#smth smth other thoughts. this lives in my head atm

[thepixelblender]

posting it as pressure on myself to write it but . post-s1 sk8 fic where adam finally agrees to meet matchablossom in some café for a proper talk about everything that happened back then and since then, but it turns out 1. he brought tadashi along 2. he has to be undercover to not get flagged as being ainosuke shindo so he's in casual drag . cue a tense and very strange double date w/ focus on adamcherry divorce & tadashi's place as the guy who they barely know from his removed position yet has also always been there

[phagodyke]

sometimes I wish I was a more interesting + charismatic person just so I could keep conversations going bc I like sharing space with other ppl but they routinely lose all interest and leave once I run out of things to say/start talking abt things that don't concern them :-(

[midnightbears]

✿ duskbound, afterlight.

#STARRING: cybertronian fem reader & other characters.

#TAGS: trauma. talks of character death. hopelessness? mentions of prostitution. no appearance of canon characters because this is an intro. hunger games reference!

#NOTES: hi! still alive, just not writing for kny atm because my head is like a powerpoint presentation with all my hyperfixations and i can't write for requests when it is on another slide. hope that makes sense. this is the first chapter of my megatron x reader, a strangers to lovers to enemies featuring pre-war cybertron, a magnanimous amount of lore, a lot of non-cannon stuff like sparklings and stuff because i can do whatever i want, and my flickering motivation to finish it. i don't have a specific transformers i'm basing the timeline off, so we will see. i thought of publishing it on ao3 or smth but i have better judgement so i just figured i would upload the first chapter on tumblr. the new transformers movie was soooo good and it inadvertently rekindled my transformers obsession. enjoy? let me know if you like it, i would appreciate it if you have questions or anything :) THIS BITCH IS LONG SO BEWARE

part two | part three | part four | part five | part six

"Y/N, my optics hurt."

"I know, sweetspark, I know."

This place reeked. Pure flowing smoke and vapor, stinking energon, and the smell of the gray coal and ash that powdered the laborers' and miners' bodies like scintillating glitter filled the pavements of that day—such fragrant poetry. 

The barely perceivable light that shone down could not even be called proper illumination in the first place. Every once in a while, the wells of your optics danced up to gaze toward where the sweltering sunlight was supposed to be.

Still, your spark did nothing but wail at you when, each time, all that you caught were mountains upon mountains of pitch-dark vapor, dull particles of dust from the mines, and the visualization of the austere whispers of despair and anguish among the workers of one of the mining towns from one of Cybertron's Primus-forsaken satellites, Nuna 5PY.

Even if you turned to look towards the downtown streets, the particles infiltrated your vents and blistered your optics.

Some workers used gas masks, while others retreated to the mines, where the synthetic stench wasn't as foul, but most were forced to return to work. They snatched up energon everywhere they could, recharged in fits and starts among their screaming. You seriously needed to leave.

As Vaportrail coughed onto the city street, you held her small servo. Even with the torrential acid pouring last night, the smog got to her well before the rush hour. 

You realized things would not improve today, so you hurried in fear of the younger developing tear-streaked optics and a headache to match. It saddened you that Vaportrail would never know what a normal life would be like. It was as though they had collectively given up years before she was born, which was unjust to her and all the future sparklings. 

You grabbed her and pulled her into the cart. Traveling was enjoyable, but not at the price of introducing additional hazardous particles into the environment. 

Mining Outpost R–02 was one of the towns from Nuna 5PY, where unnamed members of the lower classes labored interminably, tediously. The gloomy, smoky shambles of a metropolis required the Communication Grid to communicate with other areas and locations simply. It was no place for a sparkling. 

The infant cybertronian lay quietly on the sulfurous mine carriage attached to the railway, more vulnerable than the glass that was painstakingly constructed for the masses of the High-caste buildings and just as giddily colored.

You wondered if her peds are dirty; how would you know? You pondered what she ate back when Starlight was still living in this downtown slum; where did her mother get energon to nourish her? 

Your servos were callous from several scars and defects, and a part of you ached to sweep her up in her arms and shelter her eternally. But. How could you ever live with yourself if you didn't allow such an innocent being to live a tranquil life?

"I'm sorry about your carrier," You told the sparkling wistfully, making sure she was comfortable for the long ride from here to where your late best friend wanted her youngling to go if something ever happened to her. You gave her a small pad which contained personal information like her name and situation, along with a plead for somebot to take her to safety, "Cybertropolis is a nice place, just make sure you reach the police station safely, they'll know where to take you." 

"Thank you," Vaportrail squeaked out, her knees pulled up to her chest plate. 

The train inevitably started, and you walked in tandem with the slow speed of the carriage just to get a good, final look at the sparkling's dainty, cheerless face. Vaportrail would surely be a problem when she got older because all of the mechs would swoon over her—deservingly so.

With those optics and a grin as charming and gauzy as that, she was the very picture of the youthful beauty who had once bored the name of Starlight. You believed she was the sweetest femmeling on the planet.

"I love you, okay? And I'm sure your carrier is so proud of you. Good luck!"

Eventually, you had to withdraw from the train, which only allowed you to stare at the vanishing small frame of a waving Vaportrail, whose response had been forever lost in the sad, sepulchral winds of the town. 

Despite that, you could still stare at the sparkling's naive, callow features and find colossal gratitude and admiration in its place, which made a lump form in your voicebox and squeezing palpation beat inside your spark chamber.

With Vaportrail gone, the smell of blazing smoke burned your olfactory sensors and induced you to cover them with your suitable servo. You had never before realized that the shrilling blare of the injectors, the drills, the massive excavators, and the wheels of the trucks could be so overwhelmingly loud, either. From the corner of your optics, the flashes and instants of the sparks that aimlessly flew around whenever metal met metal brought you out of your bewildered daydream. 

But then you turned and saw the portrait of shattered ambition, lost hope, undetermined origins, opaque bitterness, damaged honor, futile dreams, and wavering will that assembled the cybertronians of Nuna 5PY.

It was a blow to the back of your head.

Starlight was dead.

If you closed your optics, you could still see the glow on her metallurgical protoform, the spark that no longer burned, and the sound of her laughter that still reverberated in your audio receptors and processor.

Oh, you missed her desperately. 

She'd spent her days as a young and daring cybertronian who didn't let the vacillating shame of her prostitution career ridicule her or anything she was. A good, pleasant, and kind femme that thrived and existed, only for some mech to tear her from her home and forever close her laughing optics. She was a femme, a friend, a sister, and a carrier.

She was someone.

"Oi, femme!"

You knew that whoever was calling that word in such a degrading manner was referring to you and you only. You were aware that you were one of the few femmes working on that hellhole.

Sourly, you turned your helm to the source of the voicebox and found your boss—if he could even be called that—staring at you rigorously from across the street. Other mechs were beside him, and in their hungry optics, you could see hunger, amusement, a blatant lack of respect, and other things—all of it for you.

"You said five minutes. Start moving your aft before I tell someone to move it for you."

The group of despicable mechs started laughing at the humorous, unique, spectacular, utterly not-ever-done-before knee-slapper comment. You wondered what comedians told to get a chuckle or two out of their audience nowadays. 

You detested yourself when you started walking back to the mines with crystal-clear coolant forming in your optics and with the words caught inside your voicebox.

Even the clicking of your battered timer had a languid touch in the fading light of their (your) chamber as if it were a spark-beat at rest. The perpetual rhythm of it became more of a white noise inside the transparent yet spurious safety surrounding your beguiling, chimerical space bubble. 

The memory of the lingering perfume of Starlight's aromatic utensils saturated you far more intensely than it did only days before, making you want to pound and bang your head against the wall until you ran out of energon inside your body.

Your spark chamber was wrenched apart in the core by a hollow cavity. It had been there for forty-eight groons. Faithless and cynical, the pit that took form inside of you pulled you to the very depths of your revolted mind.

You were immobile, your bare servos lying at your sides and your digits tinkering with the berth. Everything within the room drove you crazy and made you want to tear out your optics under the scrutinizing, deep-rooted omnipresence of both the carrier and the sparkling.

Vaportrail was not napping on her carrier's bed; her small chest plating was not rising and falling according to her mellow, smooth breathing. You remembered how she would spring from Starlight's berth just to greet you after every single burdensome solar cycle of nothing but suffering under the cruel comments and sometimes spiteful actions of mechs and their superiors. 

You knew and understood that she left for a better life in Cybertropolis, yet you just can't comprehend why you are not hearing her dulcet giggles and her voice as soft as a feather.

"Y/N, look at me!"

You turned your helm lightly toward the soft-spoken sparkling from your spot on your berth. 

One of your stabilizers was crossed over the other, your servos snuggly behind your helm. Due to your horizontal position, you were seeing Vaportrail in a somewhat awkward manner, whispering something to her carrier excitedly, which made you turn your whole frame so you were resting against your side, lifting your helm with your right servo.

"What is it, V?"

Vaportrail, who had her mother's laughing optics, stood proudly atop Starlight's berth beside her laying figure, servos on her hips and grin on her dermas, meekly waiting for you to look at her so she could show her spectacular stunt.

She was no bigger than a mining pickaxe, which is why she was never let out of Starlight's and your’s shared chamber. She was still tiny, even for a youngling her age, but that was not unusual, as the impoverished environment and the mediocre energon didn't do much to help anyway. Primus knows what could happen to someone so small and so weak.

Her confident, puffed-up stand made you laugh casually, as while typically Vaportrail was a modest sparkling, never one to demand attention or directly ask for what she wanted, whenever she got like this and let out her inner childishness for the silliest of things, both you and Starlight would get tons of laughter out of it.

"Go on! Show Y/N what you've been practicing," Starlight encouraged.

When you nodded at Vaportrail, signaling that your attention was entirely on her, her optics lit up. She walked towards the end of her carrier's berth, planting her peds at the very ends before turning around. 

Vaportrail crouched, and with a slight push from her servos and an impulse from her peds, she successfully rolled forward in the berth, landing on her bottom before scrambling to get up and putting her servos up in the air, muttering a small 'Ta-da!'

You had smiled warmly, watching Vaportrail giggle to herself giddily. Starlight clapped for her and swarmed her in a big hug, proud of her sparkling and happy that she had gotten her little trick right. Honestly, you were a bit jealous. You wished you could be this happy by doing something as simple as a gymnastic maneuver.

Vaportrail cheered along with her carrier, excitedly thumping her peds against the surface of the berth. Then she turned to look at you, her optics gleaming with happiness. "I did it! I did a forward roll!"

"Oh, did you?" After your rhetorical question, you languidly returned to your original position, lying with your back plates on the berth and your servos behind your helm. You cheekily turned to Vaportrail and Starlight, a sly, good-natured smile pulling at your dermas; you closed your optics. "I wasn't looking."

"Y/N!"

Both femmes happily laughed at the moping undertones of Vaportrail's voice.

"Just kidding!"

That day was a long time ago, at least it seemed to be; it felt like it. Those words were spoken in the same chamber you slept and resided in. That comical stunt was performed in the berth across from yours. They were not here anymore. Even if you wished they were back together, that deceitful dream would only be achieved by death.

No one can pursue their dreams or be free enough without it. Freedom is for the rich because dreaming costs money.

Starlight wasn't there to hold her youngling and hug you when you needed it. You weren't hearing her voice either, singing lullabies to help you both fall into a much-needed recharge. Her presence was so needed, so sought; in places like this, femmes like her were what one needed to forget about the harsh burden that was the act of being alive. To think that only forty-eight groons before she was still living, she was still here. 

Her memory made you miserable because best friends comprehend you like no other. Starlight was overly protective and brutally honest—as if she ever needed that. You felt so enraged and resentful at not being there to protect her that you feared you might break. 

Although you dug Starlight's grave, blatantly refusing to let the body of your best friend turn into waste parts or scrap metal, a part of you still suppressed the image. One day, you would properly weep for her, but first, you had to accept that she was truly gone. A part of you would never be able to accept that Starlight would never appear, skipping around a corner to tease you for falling for her clever joke.

‘How can she be dead?’

Harsh knocks against your metal door made you jerk from your position on the berth.

"08, are you in there?!" 

The boisterous tone of the mech standing behind your door made you remember that you were still real and breathing inside your crude, undeserving, unworthy existence. Your bubble-turned crystal cocoon inevitably started collapsing at the reminder that life could still go on without Starlight because, after all, no cybertronian knew who Starlight is—was. No cybertronian knew who Starlight was. The world moved on without her.

Without thinking much, you got up from the cold berth, chills flourishing in your metallurgic skin before walking the small distance towards the oxidized door and swinging it open. You would not have considered the thought of opening (being too engrossed in your self-pity and wallowing in grief, you know?) in the first place was it not for the genuine undertones of chipper motivation that were painted over H–01's usually harsh, asperous voice. 

Wait, why was he at your door anyway?

His hulking, rusted frame was as corroded as ever, and it was honestly a little sickening to look at. Despite the awful veil of dust and ash that littered him, the grayish, crimson, and dull turquoise glares of his deteriorated paint job could still be peeked at; his wheels were decaying, and his melancholic optics had lost their love for life— as had everybot else's.

Ancient as a cosmic star and twice as intelligent, with his towering structure and terse personality, H–01 was by far one of the town's most elderly seniors—and, may you add, one of the most cordial. 

You remembered the day you first arrived here, back when you were still an inexperienced femme in life, gullible, back when you dreamed dreams. 

After an accident in your old work establishment,—one of the mech coworkers had stepped over the line with you, resulting in a mining pickaxe protruding from his knee plate and a lot of energon spilled around— you had been sent to Mining Outpost R–02, and H–01 quickly took it upon himself to become a mentor of some sort as you shared letter unit. 

You recalled that he laughed as he had never before when you told him the story of why they had banned you from your previous workplace. Later, you met Starli—

"08?"

You blinked owlishly, and realizing that he was calling out to you, you grounded yourself and met his preoccupied gaze.

"What did you need?"

He frowned at your mediocre attempt at lying. H–01 was by no means stupid, and sadly, you didn’t give enough credit and didn't acknowledge how easily he could pick apart your facade, layer by layer, until your shell was utterly ripped apart.

"Kid, I may be rusty, but I'm shrewd enough to know that you're not well." You became conscious of how absurd you must have seemed in his words. He continued. "I'm sorry about your friend and her sparkling."

There it was again, that funny feeling, that blow to the back of your head. You felt your spark wail painfully, and your limbs tensed up, your optics frantically searching into H–01's face plates for any sign of mockery. You found none. You almost crumbled at his sincere words until your response was unwillingly driven back to your tanks when the piercing siren started blasting across the halls of the chambers.

Instinctively, you covered your audio receptors at the discomfort. At the same time, H–01 merely stared into the speaker device right up against the wall, a bit far away from them. From the corner of his optics, he saw many of the workers exiting their chambers, each of them confused, some of them covering their audial receptors as well, and others staring, irritated and visibly vexed at the gadget that was currently stripping them of their much-needed recharging hours.

The workers of the 8th unit, otherwise known as the H unit, approached the oldest mech from their division, questioning themselves about what was going on. Their optics wilted, and there was a slight lolling to their helms, drunk with weariness after a session of an endless cycle of mining.

"01, what's going on?" One of them asked rather loudly, trying to shout over the siren, coming up to them just as you got used to the loud siren and pulled your servos away from your audial receptors. 

You moved out of the entrance of your chamber to shut the door behind you, joining H–01 by standing beside him. They shared a brief glance, one filled with puzzlement, the other brimming with uncertainty. But before anyone could share their answer or even make a single move, the horrendous blaring of the alarm stopped. 

The speaker against the wall went completely silent, and a single red light started beeping. The Cybertronians looked at each other, baffled.

Someone talked via the speaker.

:: Attention, all workers. You are summoned to the patio at this instant. Once you reach the area, stand in your respective branch line and don't question your current predicament; ignoring this order will result in immediate offlining. I repeat: ignoring this order will result in immediate offlining ::

I need to leave. I need to leave. I need to leave. I need to leave.

That was what you were thinking when you, H–01, and the others walked among the congregation of cybertronians—you would have said mechs were it not for the few femme 'nurses' among the outer lines of the crowds, who as far as you were concerned, were the ones who took care of the workers who suffered minor accidents like infected optics, fractured limbs or something along those lines. 

It was not like they counted anyway. Primus knew what they were actually in this town for and what they did to survive.

The patio, used for Cybertronians during their spare time, was circular, wide of range, and littered with damaged devices and compartment containers, a whole mess of passed-down gear and materials. 

Whenever they got their energon rations and stopped here to rest, H–01 would remark that only the fuel granted to them wasn't recycled—well, that and the smoke. The patio boulders formed a patchwork, with stones obtained as useless scraps and waste from renovations resting together as lovely as crystalline statues from the High-caste buildings. It had artistry to it, as well as smoothness. You and H–01 used to sit there together.

You saw the executives of Mining Outpost R–02, violently shove some of the workers towards their specific department, yelling something at them that you couldn't quite catch. Considering the calm and easy-going attitude of the mistreated miners, you could just tell that they were the prissy, fastidious mechs of the upper divisions, maybe the 1st or the 2nd, where they didn't get punished for slacking off or harassing other workers along with the bosses just for the fun of it.

Your unit quickly got on its respective branches and neatly stood in line. You all exchanged terse nods, mentally preparing yourselves for whatever was about to happen. 

In front of you and the rest of your division were the mechs of the 7th unit, and behind them were the workers of the 9th, and so on. Judging by the others' facial expressions, they, too had no idea of why they'd been called here nor could muster up a word, which only fueled your desire to learn what was going on. The patio got tighter, more claustrophobic as cybertronians arrived.

You were the last number in your unit, meaning that you were placed in the furthest spot from your old friend. You lightly reclined your helm backward to attempt and catch a glimpse of H–01, but to no success, as you saw him and all the other mechs, for that matter, focused on the temporary stage ahead of them. 

It held a podium, a small staircase, and fifteen glass balls with electronic chips on them. One for each unit of the Mining Outpost. A chill went down your spinal plate at the thought.

An overwhelming, ominous silence suddenly governed the patio when a mech no one working here had ever seen before climbed up the staircase. The way he moved caused cybertronians to stare at him in fear. 

The mech was brawny and towering, and the way his helm fell over his lifeless, devoid optics and left shadows smeared on his cheek plates made others shudder. He was directly in front of the plain, pitiful microphone stand. However, an almost charming smile crossed his dermas.

"I suppose you're asking yourselves why were you brought in here."

Because of the microphone, his voice, profound and with a baritone tone, boomed across the patio, making you wince lightly at its loudness. You, of course, were desensitized from loud noises due to the continuous straining sounds of the mining machines around you day after day, as everyone else was. However, his statement caused many cybertronians to look among themselves, clearly disturbed.

"Gentlemechs, my name is Bullway, and I've come all the way here from Kaon to offer you a choice. I intend to give fifteen of you the chance of coming to Kaon with me and becoming gladiators."

Hushed whispers and inaudible sentences started falling from everyone's dermas at Bullway's words and what they implied. From the corner of your optics, you saw most of the mechs look at each other in mute amazement at what they had just been offered.

Their superiors, who were at the base of the set-up podium, quickly took it upon themselves to silence everyone with a loud yell, the absence of sound appearing once again.

"Think about it! Money, power, glory, fame, all laid at your digitprints!" Bullway threw his arms out to emphasize his words. "Join me, and all you have ever dreamed of will come true. A life of nothing but recognition! Isn't that what you deserve?! Isn't that what you dream of as you stare at the ceilings of your measly stations?!"

Dreaming cost money. Dreaming cost money. Dreaming cost money.

Almost as if he had read your mind, H–01 subtly leaned his helm forward to take a peek at the workers of the section he conducted. Most of them remained stoic, and he was very glad to see that, but what worried him the most right now was H–08.

His facial plates morphed into that of slight disturbance because as he peered into your face, he clearly saw what could only be described as contemplation, doubt, and consideration, which both bothered and worried him.

Bullway smiled at how he had you under a forged delusion and continued his speech, "See the crystal globes here? There's one for each unit of your Mining Outpost. They all contain chips with your respective electronic signatures. Each vorn you have worked here, your signature will be entered an additional time. You can figure out the rest, so let us begin!"

Each vorn?

You suddenly realized that the globes were not in order because, in the same minute that you let the circumstances sink in, Bullway had already slipped a servo inside one of the spheres and grabbed one chip from it, reading it aloud so everyone could hear the letter and number clearly.

"G–10!"

All of the divisions started looking among each other, searching for the (not) lucky mech, a pregnant silence following suit as the group in front of them all glared sympathetically at the chosen one, who stood frozen in place, optics blinking several times, wishing to Primus that Bullway had read the designation incorrectly and it wasn't him who was just chosen.

You felt a shiver run down your spinal plate when one of the guards roughly seized his shoulder and made him start walking toward the platform, ignoring the mech's begging and lightly dragging him across the patio as everyone stared in horror. Your intake suddenly went dry when Bullway moved to the next globe, grabbed an electronic chip, moved to the microphone again, and read it aloud.

This time it was from the upper divisions, A–07, you heard.

Just like that, another mech was whisked away from his branch line and thrown across the patio. He then ascended the flight of stairs to stand beside G–10, who apparently was still encapsulated in deep denial, continuously shaking his helm in disbelief. It was tenaciously obvious that Bullway did not concern himself with their worries and imminent fear as he once again moved toward a globe and grabbed another.

You wished cybertronians would step outside their own frames and oversee from the outside what was actually happening at that very instant in Nuna 5PY. Plucked from their workstations like flowers in a garden, sent off to Kaon for the purpose of entertainment for the Upper class with the bombastic excuse of 'MONEY POWER GLORY' behind it.

Prisoners inside their own bodies, trapped to fend off for themselves on a planet where no one cared about them.

Electronic signatures continued rolling off the mech's glossa like energon from a wishing well. The mechs that were chosen always did the exact same thing. They stood completely aghast for a few nanokliks, staring at the soot-stained ground in front of them in absolute shock, their frames deflating like rubber balloons, dermas parting in awe at themselves because they just couldn’t believe it.

F–03.

I–11.

D–04.

E–07.

K–15.

O–02.

When they got prodded by one of the guards, they stared at them, silently begging for compassion, but they found none. Eventually, they were pulled out of their place and shoved towards the staircase on the stage, where Bullway gleefully welcomed all the newcomer 'gladiators' just to grab another electronic chip and call out yet another designation, and so repeating the cycle.

C–01.

M–06.

B–09.

L–01.

J–02.

N–14.

Oh, there was still a globe left. The H unit.

The crowd drew in a collective breath, and then you could hear a pin drop. You were feeling nauseous, your servos clammy, your whole frame tense, your processor hurt, and your spark ached. You longed to see Starlight, you wanted to chase after the train where you sent Vaportrail off to Cyberpolis, and you didn’t know how much H–01 was desperately hoping that it wasn’t you, that it wasn’t you, that it wasn’t you.

"And the last one! H–08!"

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Am I (23m) the Asshole for not giving my houseguest (23m) a ride?

We're letting a friend of my sibling's stay at our house while he looks for a job bc he's homeless right now and it's a shitty situation to be in.

He does have a car but more often than not we're driving him around unless he's on 'personal errands', which can see him driving as far as VA or PA (we live in MD). The night before he had an emergency & needed to drive to DC.

He's a cool enough guy, but he's got some living habits that are a little annoying to deal with. (Leaves his stuff everywhere but doesn't help clean being a main one). That and literally everyone who lives here has been helping him out.

My aunt got him an employment opportunity with a high rep restaurant (bc she went to culinary school w/ the owner), my mom let's him use her laptop so he can work on his resume, my sibling rewrote his ENTIRE RESUME for him (bc his initial try got wiped by a glitch & he just gave up I guess), and I've been driving him around everywhere.

Yesterday, a beautiful day, he invited me to come with him ona nature walk. I was ecstatic but as soon as I got ready and we stepped out the house he asked me "okay, so who's driving?"

Despite him inviting me, I was the one who ended up taking us there and back & making annoying pitstops for him right before bumper to bumper traffic. (Fun Fact! I really really hate driving more than I have to!)

Tonight there's an event that I've been excited for all week that he just decided he wanted to go to today, but it's a black tie event & he didn't have any formal wear. He said he'd go to Walmart real quick to pick up a shirt and I thought I'd just meet him there. But then he came up to me and asked if I could drive him to Walmart & the party.

When I told him I didn't want to drive to Walmart for him, he said "oh, that's fine. I just don't have a job right now and I'm trying to save money. But that's cool." Keep in mind I am also unemployed atm.

I left without him & he'll be meeting me at the event but I keep having this nagging voice in the back of my head telling me I'm an asshole bc I had nothing stopping me from giving him a ride other than 'not wanting to'. I guess i'm just looking for validation or smth bc I feel like im going crazy

[ottoslab]

(Shakes you) otto you've GOTTA tell me more about the freelance mystery solvers I GOTTA KNOW ABOUT EM WHAT ARE THEY DOIN !!! I love your designs sm btw your SO REAL FOR THIS AHH

HEEHEE ohhh ok cracks my knuckles. Im gonna be writing this right before passing Out for the night so apologies in advance if this isn’t very comprehensible but i will GLADLY explain the funny freelance mystery solvers o7

EDIT HI This got so long im putting it under a readmore KGJFNGKJSGK.

Also! I didn’t draw anything to go with this ask because i told myself id give my hand a break, but I do actually have some recent doodles of Vern and Kitty i was doing in between the lineup so I’ll put them here for a little display ^_^ theyre not in context of anything im about to mention, just some dynamic exploration stuff that are their own whole other rambles

Ok! Readmore time! Paragraphs of nonsense! For your viewing pleasure!

So!! Vernon and Kitty are both employed by True Psychic Tales independently of each other when theyre older. Vernon is an illustrator/interviewer for the graphic novel division and Kitty works in special effects makeup for the more-recent live action film division! They don’t end up crossing paths for a while until being assigned to work together to research stuff for an up-and-coming TPT film project or smth. They become work buddies after reconnecting (though they choose to mostly ignore the fact that they knew each other as kids due to How They Were back then. They’re both very embarrassed about it for numerous reasons)

It becomes commonplace for them to help each other out with projects, and eventually through their research (fact-checking and digging through old psychonauts mission archives) they start to come across old psychonauts files of unfinished or ‘suspicious’ looking missions, ones that normally didnt get the green light to be told in graphic novel form due to the fact that they were inconclusive and, as a result, don’t make for good stories.

Kitty and Vernon end up sort of… picking up on these old missions in their spare time. It’s not psychonauts work but its also not not psychonauts work, you know? They team up to try and work out what lead to dead ends in missions and cross-referencing possibly related stories with other stories, and go out into the field to try and get answers. I picture it a lot in my brain as an episodic mystery series vis a vis scooby doo. They pick their archived mission log of the week to check out, go out, get some answers, and get a conclusion to bring back to TPT and a new graphic novel is made of the story they were able to uncover! With some more overarching plots where they get a little in over their heads here and there.

Franke’s got a bit less of a fleshed out role in all of this atm, mostly because i havent thought of him as much as the other two? My current vague-idea i have is that she and kitty had a falling out during their teen years, and Franke calls Kitty and Vernon falsely claiming to have a lead on a mystery theyve been working on, in order to try and reconnect with Kitty after she stopped talking to him. He has to come clean when whatever she leads them to actually ends up being a real psychic issue, and she has to explain that she doesn’t know what’s going on because she hadn’t actually called in about anything legit.

Franke does end up being a good help despite technically being the reason they got into deep shit in the first place, and Vernon’s probably the one who asks her to stick around (Kitty isn’t against it, but definitely isn’t really all too welcoming about it either.) They definitely have a whole thing where they all get closer and Kitty and Franke get to mend fences (a character arc along the lines of franke realizing he was kind of a hardass who wanted to make up without actually accepting any faults, and some other super impressive character arcs along the way im sure.) And all three of them continue to go on mystery deep-dives and uncover unfinished psychonauts missions!! Wahoo yahoo!!

Mystery incorporated asses! They’re fun, i enjoy them a lot! Hopefully this is some good tidbits of detail for u thank u for asking about them :]

[iworshipsappho]

aaah tack for the tag!! @rosetintedgreyspaces :D <33

Favourite colour and why? ooh red and honestly idk i think i was like 4 or smth when i went oooh blood = cool and blood is red therefore red=cool and i love that for me

Five comfort movies: oof uhh red white and royal blue for sure yeah, maan karate,vip and remo are some really feel good tamil movies for me and uhh badhaai do :33

Favourite season and why? oof definitely has to be whatever we have from october to january here. literally all the other months are hot humid pressure cookers :')

Favourite book(s): YOU CAN'T MAKE ME PICKKKKK. but like the obvious answers here are RWRB, the song of achilles, one last stop, ooh room on the roof by ruskin bond one of my comfort books for sure, oh and this one book i read called my life as a book, changed my life as a kid honestly. other than that we have the toa series and uhh the iliad and odyssey which i havent gotten to yet but do love

favourite aesthetic(s)and why? mmmm im a big fan of dark academia but tbf i do love most aesthetics in varying multitudes, never really got much into it

Favourite genre and why? genre as in music or media?? idk in media it is definitely queer romance atm used to be mystery and mythology. and for music i more or less listen to anything and everything thats vibey

Favourite clothes style: baggy tshirts and shorts >>>>> but thats usually for at home. when i head out ive been layering a baggy tshirt over a white shirt paired with brown pants/jeans off late. layering is one of my favourite styles for sure, the whole academia vibes or the 'teenage dirtbag' style is what i usually go for ig

Favourite music genres: ohhh music here, yeah as i said if its good me likey

Favourite artists: oof long list coming up :]] uhh taylor swift, omar rudberg, the front bottoms, wilbur soot as well as lovejoy>>>, jeff satur my beloved bottom, cavetownnnnnn, conan gray ofc, queen and then uhh mitski

Favourite song(s): i for the life of me cant possibly pick now can i???? BUT rn ive been obsessed with theseee

Favourite fandoms: young royals fandom my beloved, closely followed by mcyt bc that was my firstever proper fandom and fuck yeah for that!!! (still very much into that so les gooo qsmp and tommyinnit my beloved) and well im not really part of any fandoms save for these and rwrb tbf? oh how could i forget!!!! KINNPORSCHE!!!! love that for us

Hobbies: oof uhh reading, writing and playing minecraft or watching cubitos on minecraft probably lmao

Care language you give: i think i usually show my care in the form of words i think? pretty sure yeah

Care language you like to receive: mmmm physical touch <333

Are you an introvert/extrovert/ambivert: ehhh its pretty fluctuating. used to be introverted, getting more and more out of my shell off late. so ambivert it is ig

Morning or night person? again idfk at this point man what even is time anymore fjdksgksfg uhh night person probably tho i like satying up faaar more than i like waking up early

City, country or suburbs and why? uhhhh never really thought about it? idk on one hand i do want the quiet of the country but idk if ill survive with the constant bustle of a city ykn. and never really experienced to much of suburban life except for when i lived in australia for a few months so yeah idk

Favourite time of day and why? that time between like 5-8. the hours go by so quick and hte fucking sunset etc etc

Do you have any religious beliefs(don’t have to answer if not comfortable)? mmm vaguely religious from time to time

What does your ideal family look like to you? again its faaar too much in the future for me to have given it a thought but but ik for sure that ive always wanted kids, so thats the only definitive there

Dream future: mmm im an author lving in a little cottage just surrounded by overflowing love and creativity and nature etc etc. very ruskin bond-esque

Dream place to visit: greece and rome for sureeee. and thenn uh nyc just for the vibes of it ykn also uhh sweden for reasons ;)

Favourite type of nature: mmmm rainforests my beloved. absolutely love the earthy smell and just how fucking alive it is man like >>>>> oh also the fucking hills of north east india. lomls would drop everything and go there again no questions asked. and ofc beaches. be aches are just based

Favourite habitat (eg jungle, desert, tundra etc): mmm i have a special place in my heart for tundras and the savannah idk why. i just love that life fucking THRIVES despite ykn the harsh(er) conditions

How would you describe yourself in 4 words: dumb, enthusiastic, creative and uhhhh complicated

If you could be another thing on earth what would it be: oooo idfkkkk theres just sooooo many options i could literally be a fucking manatee!!!! or a vampire or or a mudskipper!!!!! wait can i be food?!?!?! id be garlic man ajskdsfl the fucking irony of wanting to be both a vampire and a garlic clove oooh id love to be a grapefruit ngl. omg i could be an actual monkey???? id be one of those spider monkeys man so fucking cool. gosh i could just oughhhh creatures and inanimate shit man. so cool

Favourite type of weather: i loveeeee thunderstorms. top tier weather. as long as its not during deepavali. if it rains when im trying to burst my crackers? im sorry but earth can perish /j

If you could travel anywhere right now we here would it be: is my girlfriend's house a valid answer? bc thats where i wanna be right now baksdflsd. uhh idk tbh maybe like oooh i wanna go to puducherry ngl i miss the beachhhh even tho i literally just went like a week ago man. its right here-

Do you have any fears (serious or otherwise): ehhh not as far as im aware. not materialistic ones atleast. ive always had a fear of being forgotten or left behind

Dream job: uhh a writer for sure

Would you be a pirate/vampire/cowboy/astronaut/werewolf/wizard/witch/knight/cryptid and why? VAMPIREVAMPIREVAMPIREVAMPIRE!!!!! i literally get to suck blood in the most homoerotic way possible- what more could i literally ask for ahfjdsflk pirates/knights are a close second tho fucking love them could go on a whole tirade if i wasnt to tired for it

tagging uhh @elblorbo @stygianirondiangelo @foxtriestobiteandmaimandkilland @daylightsimon @desi-yearning @altruistic-meme @spaghett-onaplate @mirabel-on-a-bicycle

💜

[ialwaysknewyouwerepunk]

If we are sharing experiences I can share mine. I broke up with him after 5 years. I left the country, so no running into each other. I broke his heart - and I broke mine. I cried myself to sleep for 4 months every night. I am also one of the least emotional people I know. No drama, always just rational. I watched one of those terrible over-the-top cheesy and unrealistic rom-coms one afternoon and I ended up crying my heart out on the floor in front of the couch.

I had to end it, he was treating me badly. It took me half a year to finally make up my mind and do it after countless attempts to save the relationship. When I broke up with him he gave me the ring. He had been days from asking me to marry him. I had worked my soul out of my body to 'fix' our relationship and he hadn't even noticed that I had been unhappy. After the break up I didn't see him for half a year and we talked only very rarely. That was the point when I felt like I was truly done with the situation. I could move on happily. We met a few times to sort out our stuff and all was well. I loved my freedom and was living my best life. We met one last time and I was in a particularly good mood. The week after I went on holiday to my fave city for a week. And all I could do was think about him and that last meeting. I had been so great that day and I had felt invincible and it somehow fucked up my brain and here I was thinking about the guy I was already over for a year. Well, I fell in love with him again. Badly. I don't fall in love often and I was really thrown off by it. After deliberating it for a month I thought I could give him another chance and I called him. Well turned out he had a new girlfriend. Just like that. To go through everything again the second time around was wild. This time more a mental fight. I really went a bit crazy at times. But I learned so much and grew massively as a person. Now I am just happy that I didn't get back with him. But it took me 2 years, in the end, to truly get over him. Now I can listen to our songs because I had to learn they are my songs as well. Sometimes if I really feel like I can still bath in the nostalgia but now it is all conscious. I know that he will forever be a part of me and it feels strange. I haven't talked to him in years and do not want to really. I hope he is happy and that he found someone he truly loves and vice versa. The most difficult thing for me breaking up was that I didn't just lose my partner and my best friend, but also all my dreams and plans for the future got shattered. It felt like someone had cut a part of my identity out of my body. But then as horrible as it all was (and it was one of the hardest things I ever went through) looking at the wonderful person I am today I wouldn't change it for anything. I am so proud of myself that I took my time and processed it properly, that I treated him with respect through it all and that when I needed it and couldn't trust myself and my emotions I took even extra time. I didn't see anyone else in those two years. Some might say I was hung up or smth but I know that for my mental health I needed to work through it properly and that I wasn't ready yet for anything new without being crystal clear in my head and heart about that relationship (I personally do not enjoy casual hookups). And now I can talk about him and praise him and our amazing relationship and it doesn't feel wrong because I know that it was, it was quite incredible for the time it lasted. But I am also fully contend that it is no more. It had its time and I am ever grateful for it!

Oh yes, and writing things down helped. And walks in nature.

thank you :'( :'o what a story. i'm so glad that you got out so well on the other side. so content and understanding of it all. i'm in awe. "Now I can listen to our songs because I had to learn they are my songs as well." that hit me, bc even if we didn't share songs to be "ours" there are a lot of songs i connect to memories with them and atm i still struggle listening to them. for a moment i was afraid it would be like that for h and l but those songs are luckily mine in the first place, and my experience of them was always mainly personal. but for those other songs, yeah. they're also mine. yeah. and the part about the best friend and the future... yeah. that was something that i couldn't deal with, and something i also struggled with in the past. it's something i will struggle with forever, i think: the way a person can be with you for such a fundamental, deep, long part of your life and then suddenly be gone. all of my heartbreaks so far really hurt me most like that so far. but this one is obviously different bc to me there was such a build already towards something deeper and long-term.

thank you for sharing <3 it makes me feel so much better to feel connected with you all, to feel supported. lots of love and hugs <3

[modern-vellichor]

Hiya! Could you do smth where the reader is masturbating in her room thinking about Bucky. When then Bucky sneaks in your room hiding from Sam chasing him, he hears you moaning his name and gets flushed but instead of leaving he decides to help you out and show you that the real thing is better than imagining it ? :)) and maybe his POV too ? ☺️ thank you dear. I’d really crave some soft Bucky smut atm.

hiya dolly!! enjoy this poorly written smut! its one am and I can't see properly :)

Warnings: 18+ smut, fem masturbation, slight teasing, edging, soft!bucky, fingering, explicit language, consenting king, this is Bucky’s world and we’re all just whores living in it.

Your hand slipped below the waistband of your underwear, fingers dancing playfully on your skin. Teasing. Your breath hitched in your throat. You rolled your underwear down your legs, throwing them in the general direction of your hamper.

Bucky tore through the compound, footsteps as loud as a stampede fell on deaf ears. He rounded corners dangerously fast, feet slipping precariously on tile. Sam yelled profanities at him but Bucky simply laughed as he escaped from Wilson's grasp. He stormed down the halls, your room was closest.

Your fingers played tenderly over your clit, you let out a breathy moan. Your other hand danced across the skin of your ribs gently. You gathered your slick on your fingers, dragging them slowly over the bundle of nerves as you moaned wantonly. You thought you were alone, you thought you had locked the door.

Bucky slipped into your room silently. He locked the door and snickered as he heard Sam sprint past your door. He gently padded through your room, reaching the little couch. You were nowhere to be seen.

You slipped one finger past your folds, into the greedy cavern of your cunt. Your mouth fell open, your head thrown back into pillows. You pumped in and out of yourself slowly, tenderly. You grazed ever so gently at the spot inside of you that made you see stars. A fresh wave of arousal seeped onto your sheets.

"Fuck, Bucky," you moaned, eyes shut as you allowed your fantasy to absorb you. You tried to imagine his calloused fingers inside of you instead of your own. You added a second finger and pumped with a little more fervour. His name fell from your lips again, this time a little louder. Passion filled your voice as your free hand wandered down to circle your aching clit.

Bucky heard his name echo through your room. He silently rose from his position on your couch, stalking towards your bed. As he rounded the corner you came into sight. Head thrown back, eyes screwed shut, mouth open wide as his name dripped from your tongue like a litany.

His eyes traveled down to where your fingers were knuckle deep in your own sopping cunt, and the others fondled your glistening clit greedily.

He discarded of his shirt and then crossed his arms over his bare chest. He enjoyed the free show as he hardened in his sweats. He waited until you were on the very edge, your orgasm leering over you as you screamed out for him. He answered.

"What's this?" and your orgasm was bring ripped from you as you hurried to cover up and began to apologise profusely. He chuckled darkly at your closing legs. “Please, don’t stop on my account,” he looked you up and down with a smirk.

“Bucky?” Your face scrunched in confusion. He slinked towards you, perching on the edge of your bed. He licked his lips, a lustful glint in his eyes. He settled between your legs and you couldn’t help the involuntary moan that bubbled from your chest.

“What, baby? Need me to help you cum?”

Still in shock, you gasped at his lewd words. His eyes sparkled with the idea of you. The baleful laugh that left his lips was full of sin and all things unholy. He hovered over you. You quivered, half in excitement and half in utter fear. He brought one hand to grip your chin, bringing your tearful gaze to his.

“Don’t cry, princess. I’ll make you feel good, can I do that?” His eyes sparkled softly.

The fact that he asked made your skin tingle with excitement. You had always been a little afraid of him, of the Winter Soldier that could still lurk. You had always expected him to take what he’s given and then keep going. He wiped the tears from your cheeks and you nodded eagerly.

His lips pressed against yours, gentle at first. He worked you open, distracting you from the metal touch trailing to the apex of your thighs. You let out a profane moan, near pornographic. Bucky smiled at you. 

He stared at you. Your eyes open in shock as two, unnaturally thick and long fingers slipped into you. You jumped at the feel of cool metal in your hot, dripping pussy. Your mouth opened but you made no sound.

“It’s okay, you’re okay,” he mumbled into your skin, pressing gentle, reassuring kisses to your neck. “I’ve got you, I’m right here.” 

You wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him close to you. Your breath came out in pants as Bucky began to work you open. He pumped his fingers gently, curling against the spot that made you go wild with each addictive stroke. His cool thumb against your clit made your hips buck. You clawed at his back, but it only spurred him on.

He would work you to the edge, whisper reassuring words into your ears and then pull his fingers away. He would sit back on his heels and smirk as you whined and writhed and begged. And once your high had slipped away and you were utterly fed up, he would crawl back up your body and return to his sinful ministrations. He did this until you were a babbling mess. 

The scent of your arousal filled the room. The air was thick and stifling. You had soaked the sheets beneath you and you hadn’t even cum yet. You cried incoherently as Bucky worked you over with his fingers. He had abandoned his gentle demeanor for something rough and animalistic. 

You ground against his hand. His thumb rubbed harsh circles on your clit as his fingers curled relentlessly against your g-spot. Your nails pressed half moon shapes into the skin of his shoulders. You begged with reckless abandon. The shame of the situation has long since disappeared.

“You gonna cum this time, hmm?” Bucky cooed as he began to work faster, he picked up a near violent pace. You nodded eagerly as you moaned wantonly.

He encouraged you softly, a welcome contrast to the pace between your legs. Your mouth opened to scream as your body went stiff. Bucky pressed a bruising kiss to your lips. He swallowed your moans eagerly. His pace relented to something soft and loving as you came down from an atomic high. You were sure you had blacked out.

Bucky pulled his drenched fingers to his lips. He sucked them clean, releasing them with a lewd pop.

“Wasn’t that so much better than you had imagined, huh?” He cooed as he pulled your still trembling form into his chest. “If you were so desperate, you should have just asked.”

[dollar-store-sparklez]

so!!!! more of the 100 days au (i need a fun name for it, in my head rn its just the 100 days mianite au, but i need smth catchier. any ideas?) so where we last left off, the old heros have returned! theyve only been lost between worlds since i was in middleschool /j right, so, theres two ways to take this now, right? either its ALL the heros. or, you make some form of isles canon (thought definitely not isles as actually shown, im sorry, isles was a mess, they needed a real outline BAD). if its the first, then, well, you have the main 4, jordan, tom, tucker, and sonja, but you also have wag, andor, martha, andor, (s2) dianite, and devisor gaines if i remember correctly? thats a big group, only 5 of which actually know this world. all of which are now staring at this lone legudo, who has been living here alone for a little over 3 months, slowly making it his own since. well. its been empty for years. the big group is exceited and happy and confused, and legundo is extremely confused because, like. hello a while dnd party of people just fell out of the sky. theres probably some rushed introductions while they all end up goung to jerrys tree, given its the only place thats actually livable with room to spare atm. if its the second, then its similar, except tom and jordan are missing, because,. because isles bullshit. ill deal with isles lore eventually. theres definitely a whole lot more confusion, followed by yknow. panic. given 2 of the mianite folks are Fucking Missing, meanwhile poor legs has no fucking idea whats going on. they all probably end up at the tree still, though its a bit more bitter now that jordan isnt there to beam at it, and tom isnt there to make jokes about setting it on fire. this route, i think, leads into something interesting, which is, well. a man who isnt the biggest fan of gods, living in the no longer abandoned lands of 3 gods and their followers, talking to them and befriending them.. in either, the heros returning would draw the gods back from wherever they were before, though, yknow, theres the issue of dianite still being dead and that throwing balance out of what, s2 dianite is there to fill in the void in either case, though hes not this worlds dianite, so its not perfect. plus in the first option, theres the fact that tom still has s1 dianites quintessence n shit from stabbin the man in the finale. jordan, meanwhile, has part of s2 ianites from her dying, along w others, and also has the fucking shadows, which is something to be concerned about later. itll take a big for things to really even out again magically in the world.  the first option... well i think they all deserve a break before anything else drops on them, they get a week or so to get to know eachother before any bullshit happens i think. second option... well theres already bullshit, but yknow, seasoned worldhopper legundo might be able to lend a hand to help find their lost friends

[jalebi-weds-bluetooth]

Hi AJ, Tumblr won't let me send the entire thing by itself so I'll try and divide it.

Also sorry this is strange and you probably don't want to spend your time giving advice to random strangers but I don't want to bother my other friends with this, because it just feels like an ongoing thing, something I constantly complain about and while they're all really kind and understanding, and probably will not get annoyed I don't want to take the chance to irritate them.

I was always the ugly duckling growing up, and despite really wanting to be extroverted, I pushed myself to be a secluded person since it felt like each time I talked to people the popular girls would make fun of shit that I said or did or wore. I did eventually make good friends in freshman year of high school (I think that's what 9th grade is, India doesn't follow that system of naming so I'm not sure) but I always wanted to have a guy best friend, because a lot of my other friends did and it seemed like the cool thing atm. So when I became friends with some guys (let's call them A, B and C) I was super grateful and happy. While I lost contact with C, me and A kept in touch and B actually lived nearby so we even hung out often, studied together and everything.

1.

He ended up moving once the exams were over, after chastising B for breaking the surprise, tbh I am not very thrilled at the prospect of any surprises but I stayed quiet because he seemed excited. I thought he'd also just want to hand out once in a while (which preferably to me is like once three months lol) but once he came over he wanted to meet everyday, I was going through teb rough time because my parents suddenly decided to split and I was living with my mom and sister alone. Once he'd come over he would not leave till it was night time and frankly I wasn't comfortable with that, he was also very touchy, constantly wanting to cuddle and hold hands and go for walks and whatnot. I've had other guy friends over time and none do that unless they ask first. He wasn't per say making me physically uncomfortable but I felt scared around him that if mom walked into the room she'd think we were together, and I don't want that, also like I said I just wasn't comfortable with the actions, not threatened just not okay with them ykwim? Even B looked at us weird when A insisted on holding hands and asking me to put my head on his lap and go to sleep or smth when we were watching a movie and I grew sleepy. I'll be honest, if this was a girl friend of mine, I'd be more than happy lol but with guys I'm not, ig I've never been, not to this extent, me and my other guy friends also hug, B brings me chocolates when I'm on my periods and he even often came to pick me from my tuitions when it got dark outside but I felt incredibly safe with their actions, like I could put my head on B's shoulder on the bike ride w/o fearing what anyone else would think because I know it was entirely platonic, with A idk, on my birthday he insisted he pick me up from home to the place we all had decided to hang out at, even though I told him I'd ask B since he lived closer A seemed mad at me so I gave in. On the ride, he kept trying to loop my hand around his waist, finally I ended up sort of hitting him over the playfully but the entire interaction made me uncomfortable. Ever since I was trying to avoid him, plus I have exams and stuff going on and am rarely free because of college and my premed exam, but he keeps insisting we hang. Once I ended up getting exhausted and told another friend (a girl from the boarding school) what I had been feeling and she validated my emotions except ig she told him exactly what I felt and he sent me a text apologising for making me feel uncomfortable and that he was having a hard time in life then and meant no harm, I felt guilty because again I feel like I had no proper experience with guy friends (even though I do now) and I apologised too. He didn't ask me to hang out since then and didn't even wish me on my birthday this year which I was actually happy with because I thought it officially meant out friendship had ended, but yesterday he texted me again and asked if I was planning on avoiding him forever. Idk what to do, I feel like a bad friend but I am also highly uncomfortable talking to him again lest he wants to hang out. He was a really popular guy in school, and I had always figured he does things like this and then patting me on the head to get girls hearts to flutter (he used to watch a lot of kdramas) but he never outright says anything wrong or even close to derogatory, I think he just likes being liked but I am not interested in him at all. In fact I don't want to hang out even if he is not close to me. 2.

Sorry AJ part of that ask may have been repeated, I can't remember where I last left off

Dear Anon, 

I read over your ask a couple of times so I could give the best advice possible. First of all, I sincerely hope you’re doing better now, considering your parents splitting and all. Sending you the warmest hugs.

Now, onto your ask. There are two things I’d like to address - self esteem and RED flags.

There are various reasons why our self-esteem takes a blow. Sometimes it’s the world’s screwed up standard of beauty. Sometimes it’s the toxic environment around us. Even though I don’t know you, what I can definitely say is that your high school peers were terrible and I’m so sorry they bullied you. That’s not ok and they are a piece of shit for pulling off things like that. And FYI, no part of you is responsible for it. 

I see you call yourself an ugly duckling - hey, that whole story is about how a swan didn’t realize it was beautiful only because it compared itself to the ducks around. The swan wasn’t even a duck - of course it would look different! You might want to read up on this report on Dove which (a) shows pictures of real women and beauty and, (b) gives a statistical insight on the screwed up beauty standard. https://www.dove.com/us/en/stories/campaigns/real-cost-of-beauty.html?utm_source=VanityURL&utm_medium=VanityURL&utm_campaign=RealCostofBeauty&utm_id=RCOB%3f&gclid=CjwKCAjwzNOaBhAcEiwAD7Tb6JioHeC7EqkZTMM2J1Ma5ISY1QPWjQpXuChQ1AZFx9dpKOnaQ9EZsBoCHf4QAvD_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds

Now, to red flags.

Your friend, A, shows MULTIPLE red flags. 

He does not respect your boundaries nor does he ask for consent - unlike your other male friends

Your friends HAVE noticed and agreed that he crosses the line multiple times in physical contact

You are at a constant unease with A - you don’t feel safe with him

You would rather be in a physically close space with your other friends than A

A gets mad when you prefer another friend

He constantly tries to get physically close to you

You were happy when he wasn’t around

A could be having a hard time in his life, it does not justify the consistent need to get physically close to you. He could literally talk to you about his difficulties rather than… wanting your head on his lap? Looping your arms across his waist? 

Gender has little role in influencing boundaries in friendship. How intimate you are with a friend depends on the allowances you have mutually given each other. With one friend you can share a bed, with the other you could hug once in four years! 

Ok, he apologised - good for him - but there’s no need for you to be guilty. You were uncomfortable. Listen, you’d be a bad friend if you hung out with him when you actually didn’t want to.

I don’t think I have the rest of your message - I think Tumblr ate them up. So based on whatever I have read, I would tell you to be honest.

You are not comfortable with him - and that’s absolutely valid. It is difficult for a friendship to exist when your first reaction to spending time with him is discomfort. There’s no way a good friendship can sustain. 

I give him the benefit of doubt that he’s under 25 - and forming his personality at this age which can be very much influenced by the media he surrounds himself with. Also, he needs to be putting in some effort. If he wants a friendship to exist then he needs to make you feel comfortable and perhaps really acknowledge his mistake without providing justification. Just staying away for some time and then asking you when you would stop avoiding him isn’t the solution. 

And the main point is you don’t want to hang out with him. The worst you can do as a friend is remain as one out of obligation instead of true friendship. So being honest with him is the best that you can do. 

I would advise you to state something on the lines that ‘given how everything went and you made me feel, I don’t think we could be friends because comfort, boundaries and consent are the most important things for me in friendship and unfortunately that simply does not exist between us. However, I truly do wish the best for you.’

Even if he was the best person on the planet, there’s no obligation necessary to be his friend when he cannot respect your boundaries.

If he can understand and learn to give respect to your boundaries - excellent. If he gets pissed - you’re better off without such a friend. 

Best,

Jalebi

P.S: I’d also recommend speaking to some of the friends you trust. Even better if that trusted person is aware of A.

P.P.S: You're uncomfortable - that's enough to not continue any friendship.

[smalltragedy]

* ryan destiny, cis woman + she/her | you know kira blake, right? they’re twenty four, and they’ve lived in irving for, like, ever? well, their spotify wrapped says they listened to babooshka by kate bush like, a million times this year, which makes sense ‘cause they’ve got that whole lazily stretched out in a ray of light, daisy shaped irises and daisy chain braids, performing an intricate dance to move the ocean's waves thing going on. i just checked and their birthday is october 31st, so they’re a scorpio, which is unsurprising, all things considered. ( james, 22, est, they/them )

hllo ive hd kira in my head fr a bit bt i also know ntohing abt her! this is me winging it even though i hv no right to <3 this is my third character maybe whose birthday is in honor of ella n coincidentally 2/3 of them r in this rp. yea im messy smirks sexily.

DEATH, GRIEF, DRUGS TW

mini playlist.

wuthering heights ;; kate bush / babooskha ;; kate bush / dreams ;; fleetwood mac / california dreamin’ ;; the mamas & the papas / lavender moon ;; haroula rose / time of the season ;; the zombies / after the storm ;; kali uchis / left hand free ;; alt-j / always forever ;; cults / wait a minute! ;; willow / your dog ;; soccer mommy.

statistics.

full name: kira blake

nickname(s): keely.

birthday: october 31st, 1996.

zodiac: scorpio sun, cancer moon, aquarius ascending. 

mbti & temperament: esfp & catalyst / sanguine. 

label: the ebullient.

sexuality: bisexual.

pinterest.

biography.

born to two original hippies which hs pretty much set up who kira is fr the rest of her life <3 the type of ppl who didnt like the boundaries of marriage n held off frm it fr as long as possible until theyd hd a spur of the moment elopement involving a celebrity impersonator at fannie’s <3 yea theyre lesbians lets go <3

nvr rly took things srsly until kira ws like 5 yrs old n then they were like ah gee ah fuck we probably shld probably settle settle. n they job hopped n worked many odd jobs until they found their footing in careers they liked n one of them probably does like. blown glass art. n the other prob fixes old computers n other ~vintage~ mementos of the past fr ppl.

they make a decent living n they live in delpinius heights n they try a few times fr another kid bt it nvr rly works out (raises an eyebrow. adopted siblings anyone?) n fr the most part kira as a child spends her time running around town and tugging on the hem of other’s shirts to ask them small favors (mostly to play a game with her)

often left unsupervised as a kid, bt not in the way tht her parents dnt care (bc her parents love her a lot a lot a lot like she is their world) bt in the way tht they simply raised her the way they were raised. running amuck all day n coming home jst in time fr dinner, front porch light always on, cat always waiting faithfully on their stoop.

pretty evident frm a young age tht kira’s mind saw things differently, in a different light - the world an array of light n mystery n sound n taste n sometimes those collided n created new experiences. prob hs some form of synsthesia bt dnt ask me which one yet. she’s a painting prodigy with an excellent understanding of color theory.

always ws known as a kind of like. rambunctious kid. a well meaning class clown who cld nt keep her mouth shut fr the life of her. grew up constantly with a yellow card beneath her name in school bt ws always well liked by her teachers n classmates alike.

jst a very bright child who did well naturally bt always ws turned more towards art.

feel like her parents very noticeably turned a cheek when she started smoking weed w the cool older kids when she ws 13. the type of person who wnts 2 b liked so bad she’d jump over a hurdle fr it. hs jumped over many hurdles n many fences n many other obstacles to be liked bt does it without breaking a sweat.

(edit: nw tht i think abt it hwevr i dnt think she does tht anymore i think while a bit of a mess atm she. likes herself. n doesnt rly want or need the approval of others anymore she jst does her own little thing. bt when she ws younger? she jst wnted 2 b friends w the entire world.)

nothing bad rly happened fr like. a good bit of her life. got into psychedelics at some point in high school n tht only heightened her artistic abilities. most of her high school art portfolio ws probably done while high bt <3 does it matter.

hd a high school sweetheart n they were pretty serious like. full on in love. a total believer of soulmates kira ws jst like. this is the one. there is nobody else i cn imagine my life with.

death tw

death tw

death tw.

death n grief tw // yea. sometime during their freshmen year of college. car incident. kira ws nvr the same though she’d like to pretend tht nothing’d ever happened. like theyd nvr existed. like she didnt plan out their entire lives together hiking thru hills n valleys n boating across various bodies of water n traveling together until they were old n wrinkly. end of death tw //

cld nt explain 2 u why kira hd bought a van n completely demolished it only to drain all of her savings remodeling it bt nw she lives in it by the beach. hd dreams of travelling the world bt cannot go long distances in a car without feeling sick. sees planes n feels envy. stopped painting fr a long time bt she’s started back up recently. took on surfing. told her parents tht it ws fine n tht she ws fine n theyre concerned bt shes always by the beach, her van rarely leaves. she’s trying her best bt its only been a few yrs n i think ppl cn sense tht shes jst nt the same cheerful girl as they once knew. end of grief tw //

anyways. tugs on my collar. tht’s kira! she lives on the beach n surfs everyday n is obsessed with daisies n is prob growing her own shrooms somewhere. 

personality & facts.

always been very emotional n a little dramatic. nt a drama queen bt is a little messy n does not hv like. many rational thoughts up in there. very cup full or cup empty.

regardless though she hs an. overall reputation fr jst being. enjoyable to be around. her her little moments bt shes also pretty like. laidback. in a way. KDSHFSDLKHGHFLKSD

prob bc she smokes a lot or is often <3 on a trip if u know wht i mean <3

god. got obsessed with the 60s n 70s aesthetic at some point n hs not gone back evr. big fan of psychedelic rock. is a prodigy painter bt her life dream outside of traveling ws always to own her own record label. hs nt happened yet, maybe will never happen? works at a record shop though n does hide the good vinyls tht she wants away frm the customers.

very cheerful n usually uplifting n she doesnt like to b negative around others bt smtms she cnt control it n smtms thinks tht ppl r out 2 get her jst out of. anxiety. hs long bouts where she’ll sit in a still sort of sadness n then shake out of it n hop back into conversation like nothing’s happened bt. its fine we’re fine kira is fine.

shes not gullible or naive bt wants to believe tht everybody hs a heart of gold even if its false. keeps giving ppl second chances bc she hs a savior complex n thinks she cn change ppl.

is very into zodiac n will judge u by ur chart. knows everybody in town’s natal chart. even newcomers. it’s a little scary hw quick she finds this information bt its very important to her.

kind of like. into spirituality bt i wont lie its very surface level n a little superficial. learning tarot cards bt cannot fr the life of her memorize the meanings so smtms she jst makes up things on the spot. hs so many crystals she will not stop buying them.

i think a part of her is desperately trying to cling onto tht like. think positive. self care. msg thts super prevalent online without addressing or actually helping any of her problems. it is her flaw </3

hates to admit when she needs help. wld rather do everything herself.

head is a little in the clouds n her parents r a little concerned fr her bc shes nt rly doing much rn bt like. she jst needs time i think. shes jst doing her little thing.

does not give up on ppl easily she absolutely hates dropping ppl frm her life even if she grows 2 resent them over time which is bad bc she is bad at hiding when she is upset at someone or when she doesnt like someone.

like shes jst passive aggressive abt it n does not properly communicate <3

bt this is rare i think ... negative feelings abt other ppl

self centered bt not selfish if tht makes sense. she will do things fr others without a problem n sometimes trips over herself 2 do it bt at the end of the day i think she cares abt herself the most.

hs only been in love once bt hs hd many infatuations n many like. admirations n very surface level feelings. her body is a temple n she loves 2 b worshipped.

prob does fkn. beach yoga. probably vegan bt also maybe breaks tht every once in a while. almost noncommittal its hard 2 distinguish between her being carefree, not taking care of herself, or jst hving commitment issues? flaky or not? who knows.

feels jst a bit too strongly bt tries to contain it. jst full of multitudes or smth. idk. icon <3

like. cares bt doesnt care. does thinks tht r purposely self destructive n then acts like shes like. cool girl monologue frm gone girl. bt does it while being like peace n luv on earth x

ok thts all i hv goodbye

wanted plots.

a pseudonym 2 fool ‘em... ;; jst hd this idea pop up bt i like the idea of kira going undercover 2 expose cheaters. whether she does this on her own accord or is personally requested by smbdy is up in the air. a plottable point. she h8s cheaters n is chaotic good she prob thinks shes the relationship vigilante testing the strengths of other’s relationships. once again she cld b. specifically going undercover fr smbdy 2 help them out. im sure she wldnt go 2 very. extensive srs measures like actually. sleeping w the assumed-cheaters bt once again. world is our oyster n i lov drama?

crystal visions ... ;; once again. shes super into crystals n astrology n she will base sm of her opinions of others on it. this is nt just abt her being judgmental of others bt also jst. catching her running around in the rain trying sooo hard 2 fkn. charge her crystals in the rainwater bc she forgot 2 charge them under the full moon the night b4. this is her giving wrong tarot readings. she hs no idea wht shes doing at any given time bt acts like she does know. acts like she knows the entire world. she gives crystals as gifts n will do ur natal chart for u bt will also pack her things n leave if ur a capricorn.

time of the season... ;; i dnt knw admittedly. this song’s abt being horny so perhaps? perhaps. kira isnt rly able to keep a grasp on long term relationships rn due to. factors in her life so she hops frm person 2 person often. smtms jst flings smtms its jst a relationship accidentally led on. shes noncommittal n a little flaky atm when she’s usually ride or die fr others. perhaps this is all in the name of some good fun! world? oyster. 

literally anything .dsfskhdkgs ;; god. shes so new i jst dnt know. childhood friends. current friends. friends shes hd frever. enemies n ex lovers n ppl shes constantly pushing away or scorned lovers or both or anything?? she pushed them out of the roller rink to make more room fr herself or maybe they did tht to her. perhaps theyre both constantly pursuing some sort of fkn. meaning in their lives tht they cnt quite grasp. mayb they go on an acid trip together. who knows. 

[neo-shitty]

toffee!

ah yeah, i think quarentine has given people some opportunity to actually just sit with the person they are, rather than be rushing around for the person they want to become. its good you got smth good out of isolation! ah thats great! hope you had fun and ur partner in crime speeds back home so you can get out more hehe.

ah yeah ty, good suggestions.

hmm good point, i was sort of putting it separate to the whole not-sexualising thing, but yeah. mmm yeah i totally agree, some of the enhypen fics/imagines *shudder* and even reading innie stuff is just a bit *icky* cos everyone still thinks of him as our agi ppang. yeah def would be good but sadly this just seems to be the world we live in. :(

ah yes the holy masterlist (not sarc) i have actually read in the rain and gladius maximus before, but ill go look for in class! oooh thats good! character development lol. hmmmm yes champagne problems was the angst to end all angst, that shit hurt. it was actually one of the first of your fics i read and i recall almost crying over the whole thing, it was so heartbreaking, i can see how it almost made you want to drop angst. good that youve allowed yourself some lee-way tho :)

hehe thats so cool. okay here we go, ill try not to be mortally offended (/hj)

cheese - yes same, i liked it but that was all there was, it wasnt a super standout track. it was rlly underwhelming for me but some of the hook is super catchy so there is Redemption (tm) in store for cheese maybe

thunderous - mmm, yeah at first i totally agreed, i think they suffer from too much good music syndrome, that all their other tracks are such fucking bops its hard to stay at that level of perfection. the choreo was beautiful tho and tbh, the track has grown on me since ive been watching all the vids abt it. its my brothers favourite track

domino - YES GODAMMIT IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE TITLE TRACK. the raps, the vocals, the vibes, the fucking domino sound in the back? i would have streamed that shit on repeat. but tbh, as good as it is, it doesnt have that sort of grandness/oomph that skz seems to like in their title tracks so i can see why they chose thunderous (tho domino would have been so good) *sigh*

ssick - yeah same, not my fave track by a long mile, the crowd cheering was a ?strange? choice and the chorus was a bit bare/empty, plus like i mentioned earlier, it was kinda funny to me for some reason but ill still play it if im playing thru the whole album

the view - ahh one of those not like other girls (/j) i honestly think its just a good party song, just a bop to play in the background when nobodys rlly paying much attention. its pretty generic pop music but catchy

sorry, i love you - hehe yeah i thought it was going to be sadder as well, but i rlly loved the fact that they all just got to sing, which almost never happens, i dont think ive heard felix sing for a long time, so i enjoyed it. wasnt rlly a standout track but i just casually like it. looking forward to the fic haha

silent cry - this song i swear, some bits are rlly good and then others are just? why?? it does sound like a dance song tho idk. definitely not one of my faves either

secret secret - YES its so good! its such a chill song and i love their vocals in it. the combination of lo-fi/fake strings backup stuff and their heavenly vocals just makes it *chefs kiss* im listening to it rn and just... its so beautiful. it gives me pumped up another day vibes ya know? like my pace is edgy get cool, this one is energetic another day i feel like. overall i love it

STAR LOST - ah thats so cool! i didnt know that! on first listen this song had a similar vibe to secret secret but then the beat came in and ahh its such a good song. i can totally imagine them putting this song to a concert footage vid, this song is so sweet.

red lights - LMAO YES ITS SO AWKWARD WHY DOES IT GO ON FOR SO LONG ah thats good! yeah good point, its quite intense hehe. but that is my fave trope and this is lowkey my favourite track on the album so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ just the combination of hyunjins and chans voices, the backing music, the lyrics ahh red lights my beloved

surfin’ - yes lmao its always a shock, i feel like they should have put gone away in between them, but its such a fun cute song, i cant get rlly mad. yeah, as an aussie i think im contractually obligated to like beaches lol. sand im not such a fan of, but my familys rlly into fishing and my brother loves bodyboarding so we stay at a beach house at least twice a year and we live like 5 mins from 3 different beaches (hehe all aussie cities are on the coast lol) so thats cool. do you like beaches?

gone away - ah gone away my beloved, i love this song sm, its just so pure and showcases their vocals and lyrics so well. yes the pitch change is very out of the blue, i feel liek they went directly from seungmins soft vocals to hans powerful ones which was an interesting choice, but hey, im not complaining

wolfgang - YES IKR ah im so happy he got to be included in that era and song. yeah its such a full on song i cant rlly listen to it if im in a quiet mood but its very motivating :)

hehe mood, i hope they do! ahhh no rest, but at least you wont have to pull a blink and wait a year for any word from the group lol. im not rlly into nct but im excited for them! ah hopefully youll be able to sneak some rest into that chaotic schedule, with enhypen (idk if u stan but yeah) squeezed into it haha

<3 w.a. 🐺

i wheezed at partner in crime, it reminded me of smth. i have a lee know fic in the drafts that i wrote 'in honor' of him (and his departure-ish). i'll tag you when i finish it, if you want. it's a rather hilarious one.

oh my god. based on my experience on the collabs i've joined before, writing explicit shit for '01 & '02 is not accepted (nct's maknaes) but with enha's hyung line '01 & '02 somehow it's okay? i do a double take every time i see fics like those i mean, technically, it's legal but still what the fuck. maybe it's just not for me at the moment. not at us venting our frustration about this. it's just something that's so accepted here that i am (in all honesty) slightly uncomfortable about. but oh well. that's kpop writerblr for you.

man i could've linked all the fics in the ask instead so you wouldn't have to go looking for them! i think i saw you like in class the other day (the fic i renamed into sharp-tongued, god it took me a while to remember the new title). describing champagne problems as an angst to end all angst is one way to put what i was feeling back in december. it just hurt to write and admit?? if that ever happened to me i would prolly cry :d

okay back to the album talk! i love how you answered with more thoughts. i love exchanges like these! i am a victim of the cheese hook and it's now one of my favorite tracks in the album. PLS, TOO MUCH GOOD MUSIC SYNDROME. that's on our self-producing kings 😌💅 also, your brother has taste! as i am typing this, domino's currently playing in my head and i realized that too, that it doesn't have that 'vibe' of a skz title track. honestly, this could be a title track of another group. ssick is starting to grown on me because i found the beats cool kdjsk not the not like other girls 😭 the view is the generic pop that i don't like but i get why a lot of people enjoy it. sorry i love you scratches a certain itch that i find myself singing the first few lines every time i remember it. i too would want to hear felix sing more!

> a mini junction on the album talk bc i got side tracked. on that topic, i want skz to switch positions at some point like i know those allrounders are capable of doing so. specifically, i want to hear seungmin rap!!!! (yk in the recent weekly idol he talked faster than changbin in a challenge and changbin is like the fastest rapper in kpop that's active atm if im not mistaken. my dandy boy has some potential and i want it UNLEASHED.)

back to album talk. silent cry is basically sad music to twerk to. secret secret is definitely one of my favorite tracks :( i loved how you compared the tracks HAJSAH i burst out laughing bc yk what, you're right! i want to make a star lost edit of skz but i simply do not have the time i want to cry. i love the song so much. ok, my dreaded track, red lights. idt i have played the track since we last talked. my friend sent me the lyrics tho and i'm itching to write a twisted au out of it. idk if you're comfortable with yandere but somewhere along those themes. the obsessive type of love that's sweet at first but turns rotten. IMAGINE IF THEY PUT GONE AWAY BETWEEN ASHJA it's like going from 50 shades to the notebook.

i was about to ask if you lived near the coast and you literally mentions it here god im so stupid. yes i LOOOOOOOOOVE beaches so much. living in an archipelago is fun :( i live in a part of the country that's more island than city so every time i want some vitamin sea it's accessible. i heard the waves in australia are great :( anYWHOOO gone away :(( every time it plays im compelled to skip it because it makes me sAD AND NOWADAYS I DONT HAVE THE TIME TO BE SAD. contrary to you, i dislike my quiet moods because i tend to overthink a lot.

i have this little analogy about how there are stays that enjoy songs the generic pop + mellow songs and then there are other stays that enjoy the noisy tracks. in my mind, it's like a perfect balance that makes me feel like all the tracks are loved in the end. just by different people.

PULL A BLINK. bro i fucking hate yg entertainment. they have the biggest kpop girl group LOCKED in their basement when they could be (and i mean this in the most business-like way not morally) milking money of the quad. they're yg's biggest hope at not being bankrupt atm so it's a damn fucking mystery to me as to how they aren't doing anything. (jk i just realized lisa solo album soon, but i still need a ot4 cb hELLO)

i stopped looking forward to the teasers. rest > kpop boys. i don't want to sound like a cult member but have you tried checking out nct? are they just not your thing? (i get it tho, that's one hard group to get into). and yes i do stan enhypen!

wow i love how long these asks are! they're like online penpals. but i also want to ask about you! how have you been lately? are you feeling okay both mentally and physically? how's the weather there? do you have anything that you want to talk about? maybe an interesting book you read? feel free to bring up anything you want to share! i'm getting conscious about talking about myself HAJHSJ

and yet another long answer B) i am sooo sorry T___T should these ask exchanges feel draining to you, feel free to stop sending them in AAAA

[deathvsthemaiden]

Tagged by @natalya-romanova (ty! 💕💕) to answer this 30 question ask meme!

1. Nickname: none! Like friends and family can call me specific nicknames but they’re not free for all’s for anyone to use on me so 🤐

2. Gender: female

3. Star sign: Cancer, idk what that says abt me

4. Height: oh god. 5 foot smth not very tall numbers are not my friend 😐

5. Time: basically 11pm

6. Birthday: July 5th 🌟

7. Favorite Bands: Saint Motel, Glass Animals, IDKHBTFM, Tape Five, Hippo Campus 💙💜

8. Favorite Solo Artists: Victoria Monét, Janelle Monáe, Adia Victoria, Tamino, Caro Emerald, Tanerélle, Frank Ocean 💛🧡

9. Song stuck in my head: none. Ghlana by Noura Mint Seymali is playing via my headphones rn tho

10. Last movie: Vampires vs The Bronx ⚰️

11. Last show: Schitt’s Creek

12. When did I create this blog: 2015? 2017? 🧐

13. What do I post: random thoughts that come to mind and I rb art, words, fan art and other fandom-y stuff

14. Last thing googled: Homegoing family tree (as in the book by Yaa Gyasi, I had to refresh my memory on some things) 📖

15. Other blogs: a blog for art tutorials and a blog for art references 🖼

16. Do I get asks: sometimes! 💖

17. Why I chose my url: it’s somewhat of an inside ish joke? But mostly just bc I find it hilarious 🧸👁👁✨

18. Following: 3461

19. Followers: 694

20. Average hours of sleep: I don’t know if I could possibly calculate that :/ I’m very disoriented and inconsistent nowadays wbsjwjhsjshs 😴

21. Lucky number: numbers fill me with unease 🥴

22. Instruments: nope 😗

23. What am I wearing: pjs 💤

24. Dream job: omg.... probably something that doesn’t exist. Can I just test drive mattresses for the rest of others? Be paid to sleep on them and give reviews? Otherwise potter/ceramicist 🥺🤲🏽

25. Dream trip: don’t feel like going anywhere rn tbh... I’m in bed that’s good enough 🥱

26. Favorite food: rn id love some of those tiny samosas with sriracha <3 or hot and sour soup

27. Nationality: American

28. Favorite song: atm? Warm by Dre’es or Cherry by Jungle, can’t decide ☀️🍒

29. Last book read: Interior Chinatown by Charles Yu

30. Top 3 fictional universes I’d like to live in: 1) Roshar of The Stormlight Archive but specifically the Purelake.... oh to be a Lightweaver and dwell in the Purelake.... or Herdaz..... 2) honestly. I forget the name of the planet Warbreaker is set on but that would be fun too I want an increased heightening 3) a vague fairy tale esque world like the kinds in some of my favorite books that aren’t clearly defined but not nonsensical either. Just our world but not modern and more overtly whimsical 🤔 if that’s a bad answer then I choose the world of Eragon bc of the sheer amount of time I’ve spent daydreaming abt it as a kid 😳🐉! 4) Fate and Stormlight consume me most nowadays so a very specific version of Chaldea.... maybe

Tagging: no one for now! If anyone would like to do this, consider yourself tagged in spirit!! Go ahead and do this and tag me 👀

[madmadmilk]

(sending this to u because u always do amazing things with these little drabbles i send u) i'm staying with my cousin atm and her 3 daughters are kids and loooove Spider-man, and i'm just imagining bringing Tom home to meet the fam or to a fam wedding or smth and introducing him to them, and him being so good with how excited they get that their cousin is dating actual Spider-man!!!!!!

oh, WORD, lmao. i imagine that you would wait a while to tell your (extended) family about tom, just cos of the rumors and the fact that... you weren’t sure how long it would all last. you were just along for the ride, and you thought he was too until––

you bring him to you cousin’s wedding, not saying anything other than the fact that you were bringing a “plus one.” that definitely stirred up some fanfare, but your family was happy for you.

“everyone is going to recognize me,” tom boasted, beaming as you straightened his tie. he doesn’t mind the spotlight on this occasion, he’s happy to become a bigger part of your life. you’re entering new territory together, and he actually feels well equipped for this.

“oh, don’t remind me,” you groan, playfully patting his chest. “i’m gonna have to play bodyguard all night!”

and that is how you expected it to go, for your family to be shouting and yelling that Tom fucking Holland was here! in the middle of nowhere! with YOU! (you kinda worried that it would take attention away from your cousin’s day but–– i mean, come on, it’s spider-man!) you pictured the unrelenting lines of people asking for photos and autographs, which you would both have to turn down (for the most part). you both had smug prideful grins, washed over with a layer of tiredness. you were together at least :)

but get this..... 

no one.... recognized him. you introduced him as tom, and he was courteous, gorgeous, charming, shining–– but everyone just shook his hand, smiled, called him handsome and left. leaving the both of you a little more stunned than you’ve been in a while.

like, first of all, that’s spider-man, and hello?? you finally brought someone home to meet the family?? what is this apathy right now????

kinda lame?? tbh

you and tom make yourselves feel better by saying that this is your cousin’s wedding, and that he or you should not be the spotlight of the night. he hugged your shoulders and kissed your forehead humming,

“maybe we can actually... enjoy tonight. like a normal couple.”

you laugh together, both of you so tense and prepared that, you forgot to savor the moment of relaxation. everyone welcomed you both so warmly, and there’s good food and good music–– you could take this time to let loose and enjoy one another.

in time, you dragged him all over to introduce him to family, friends, friends of family, family of friends–– and everyone was cheery and polite. no wandering eyes or curiosity though. 

you and tom talked amongst yourselves in disbelief,

“your family watches movies right?”

“... i think so?”

and you broke into a fit of laughter together again, while tom’s eyebrows furrowed. usually, “the validation of the public” doesn’t wound his ego too much, but this was your family. these were people he wanted to impress. you squeeze his hand tight in yours and lean your head against his shoulder.

“huh, tough crowd.”

“I’ve been saying that all my life.”

you hug him gently and get ready to change the topic, until you hear the peep of little voice behind you.

“th-that’s spider-man... right?” 

“you ask them!”

“no, you!”

you and tom bite your lips, and look at each other with wide eyes–– was this finally The Moment?????? you both look over your shoulder with sly smiles.

three of your younger cousins were whispering loudly behind your seats, hands over their mouths and bright-eyed.

you wave at them to come over, and they do hesitantly, eyes on you first then glued onto your talented, beautiful partner.

tom cocked his head as you smiled warmly. he reaches over to squeeze your knee and jokes,

“that’s more like it.”

and he turned to them, lively–– and unconsciously slipping into his american accent, and entertained 3 of his biggest fans.  you see him pretend to sling webs, and stand up to carry one of them, the other clinging to his leg–– ultimately befriending them as tom, and not just spider-man.

you watch from you seat, laughing and snapping pictures (that you shouldn’t take, but who cares). it attracts some attention, people glancing towards him on the dance floor, covered in kids calling his name. tom takes time to look back at you, his wavy hair falling in disarray and cheeks pink.

“you’re doing great,” you mouth to him, flashing a dazzling smile of your own.

and you know what, your family thought so too. they watched this young man walk in beside you, tend to you, tend to your family, and return to your side at the end of the night. all with lovestruck eyes and genuine smiles.

you couldn’t ask for a better impression.

🙊🙊🙊💕

[thelosthighway]

B99 Bake off AU.

It’s the most irrelevant thought but I can’t get a bake off au out of my head even though they’re not British and have never mentioned baking before but I Do Not Control the Hyperfixations

Since Amy canonically cannot cook for shit, it’d be Jake who’d go on the show

Their life journey would be the exact same but they’d live in England (I feel like London is the Brooklyn equivalent) and maybe Jake and Gina started cooking at a young age to pass the time

OR, Jake learnt how to cook/bake since Amy couldn’t cook at all and he wanted to be able to treat her and their kids

Jake is Super competitive and he wouldn’t be afraid to show it, but also if another baker is going to absolute shit he’d try and help them finish in time even if he’s not sure it’s allowed

Amy is an avid watcher of the show, and showed it to Jake, and he signed himself up after binge watching and practicing his heart out

Charles also helped him along his baking journey by requesting super exotic and difficult bakes that’d later turn out to be the technicals, causing Jake to always be on top

It’d show bits of their precinct life in the show when they do their ‘about the baker’ segments, and Jake would be one of those that viewers Love of course, and he’d develop some social media fame, despite his account being filled with LQ pics of his bakes and just loads of pics of Amy or the squad and his selfies

If this is set about a year or two after they have their son, it’d have clips of Jake looking after him, and Ive always imagined that Jake would stay home more than Amy; since she’s still working on bringing to life her life Calendar and it’d be soft as fuck

Those who are a part of the G-Hive would know Jake already cause I hate Gina being a bitch so in my world she’s kind and her and Jake are still friends, so Jake’d get like a cult following

And as Jake talks to the judges or cameras, he’d always be saying like “my wife, Amy” or “my dad” (holt) or “my best friend, Charles” bla bla bla and tell a lil story giving other people credit for what he’s doing

Jake is committed and will persevere, maybe he does a fuckin joe sugg in SU2C bake off where he hurts himself, faints and wakes up and just asks “how long have we got left?” And gets right back to work cause that shit cracked me up big time

Jakes station at the end would look like a tornado had hit but the actual end result is beautiful and well polished

Jakes good under pressure, so I feel like he’d have a selasi vibe, where everything’s going wrong and he’s still joking about, and lightening the mood of the tent

Would Paul give Jake daddy issues again? If Paul doesn’t like it would he be devastated? If he likes it would he cry?

Prue would remind him of his mum or smth and cause Jake issues again this boys got layers ok

Would this be like bake off 2 season 1 where Paul and prue are just in love with everything he does like they were with Steven?

Jake and Noel would compliment each other’s personalities so fucking much and every one of their convos would be hilarious

I might add more to this cause I’m in love with this idea atm

[kaoarika]

I kinda want to scratch the “joining in good faith” part of my theorizing about Nemu from my last post about the last hpmi drama track.

But, tbh... this is perhaps little less worse than what I was expecting about her reveal back in December. “Little less worse” because anything like human traficking (which was part of that kidnapping storyline in BTB), or death is TECHNICALLY worse than “being part of Party of Words and Central Ward by brainwashing”. Yeap.

I don’t feel good for knowing that exact detail. Definitely suspected it from the very beginning (and very convenient of Ramuda being the double agent he is -clones/copies aside not being 100% confirmed atm- being a fashion designer who recruits young women as “models”... yup, nuff said :))) ) because, while I think some women might have joined POW and/or CW in good faith (like anything equivalent IRL, perhaps a bit too naively, maybe not), some might not... or were they forced... by brainwashing, too. 

Exactly where I thought this was the direction it was going for. (also, because I still think 19 IS a pretty fishy detail to go by - I believe it is pretty young for such a position in the government, it doesn’t matter if you tell me “but this is fiction, Kao” >.>).

I’m not gonna say this was as gut punching as the BBs Drama Track’s reveals dump, but still somewhat in that same sad train of thoughts. We didn’t have a very... bittersweet ending (because it does seem that MTC have their camaraderie on a good point? with a same objective on front), even though it did end in a very anxiety inducing cliffhanger.

The thing with the BBs’ being “VERY gut punching” was because most of the stuff about MTC was built and revealed slowly from the beginning (the military involvement with the hypmics, Jyuto having his reasons to be like he is, Samatoki and the mysterious whereabouts of Nemu, all of these have been hinted and told from the beginning), but the thing with the BBs...? not really.

Hence why they seemed a bit “plain” in hindsight, compared to the others... in contrast, for example, with MTC.

We didn’t know about the orphanage until the BTB manga... it was hinted they were orphans, yes. But, not the whole gut punching situation train around them. Okay, orphanage? Fine. The head of the orphanage being a douch*ebag who attempted to child trafic the kids under his wing? Yikes. Ichiro working his butt since he was FOURTEEN? Plausible. Bad experiences with paternal figures? Eh, I can see it. ...because their previous caretaker was ALSO a douch*ebag? Okay, wai- A conman who is probably pulling the strings or is a middle man of sorts TURNS out to be their obvious absent father who MIGHT have abandoned them? OKAY, SERIOUSLY, WAIT. OH, and did we mention the Yamadas are some of the victims from WWIII? I SAID, WAIT.

Adding the factor that the whole real hypmic deal was recently put in action in the side manga and BTB only to confirm that “okay, yes, Sasara and Kukou were hypnotized. CW wants to brainwash Jakurai, too... this was only to reaffirm: “Ah, and by the way... there’s a high chance that not ONLY Nemu was brainwashed to join CW, just saying~”

So, there’s that.

It’s nice to see the camaraderie between the guys. Fighting for a dream, and all that. This track made Riou shine a lot, though, hahah. I think he is a severely underused (and somewhat understimated) character, because from lots that I have seen about him (fanon and the like) is because his personality is mostly built around what he lived under the military. It’s also quite nice seeing Samatoki in such a position where he is not the cocky, short-hair-tempered man he is (although the gap moe has been shown before) because his weakness is his little sister. So, it’s easy to assume that Ramuda/CW/POW KNOWS how to get into him.

What DOES intrigue me is... was Ramuda the one who ordered the arrest (through hypmic influence) just to “disturb” things around (”supposedly” Ichijiku wasn’t involved, but... do we believe her at this point?) to see if he can get into a side of Samatoki (at least my theory about Jyuto knowing her fell through) of pure weakness? Or to divide MTC (like what Amayado’s intentions with the BBs probably were)?

I kinda wanted this track to go to other direction, but it was definitely going to tackle the thing with Nemu, anyway.

With this, I can briefly assume what the other two divisions’ Drama Tracks might cover: 

Fling Posse’s is probably going to deal the thing about Ramuda, PROBABLY confirmation about the Dice’s theory and... whatever Gentaro related (could be the thing about his real identity? his friend at the hospital’s identity?).

While Matenrou could go a bit deeper into Jakurai’s past (probably involving Hitoya and BAT in a sense), and probably more revealing details around Hifumi’s gynophobia and Doppo’s... hmm... smth? (we know he had a previous encounter with Jyuto, though).

Aside point/addendum - I can see the side manga series (while not BTB yet?) ending soon (FP & M confirmed) because the events of the 2nd DRB are still going to be developing as I’m writing this. But, I can probably assume once the DRB passes (results and all?), I can somewhat see KR and Kodansha resuming in the adaptation... or not, because there will be the anime, too... Hmmm...