#smells like team spirit
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🏈🌺🌊 SMELLS LIKE TEAM SPIRIT (10K) 🌊🌺🏈
by persephoneflouwers
High school || Punk Louis x Quarterback Harry || Late 90s AU
Louis and Harry have been secretly dating for years. Feeling overwhelmed by his commitments, Harry suggests a short break, fearing he can't give Louis enough time. As Louis reflects on his vulnerabilities, Harry struggles on the field without him.
Or the Diamond boy and Golden boy AU.
Written for the @1000feelingsfics , prompt #320: the grim satisfaction of ultimately being the best person.
READ NOW on AO3 🏈🌺🌊
Thanks to @thedicklace for the amazing poster! 💜
#obsessed with this poster!#louis has glitter and eyeshadow and a choker and and anddddd#the diamond boy x golden boy au#larry stylinson#larry fanfiction#hlficlibrary#trackinghome#trackinghappily#my fic#alwaysxlarrie#thelarriefics#smells like team spirit#punk louis#football harry#teenage AU#no smut
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NEW SLTS Chapter - The Dawning Light of Grey: Part Three
Kai took the shoulder to the chest, grunting as he hit the ice.
With a chuckle, Dean skated into the Grey zone.
Blowing out a breath, Kai scrambled to his feet as two Red players slipped into the Grey zone.
Carson Gregg ducked around Remi and charged one-on-one at Raul. He flicked his wrist, striking the puck straight at the net.
Raul snagged it out of the air but fumbled when a stick sliced at him from the left. More players closed in around the goal and Raul juggled the puck.
Hold on, Kai thought, just hold on.
Bodies shoved and jostled each other, sticks clacked, and the puck flew toward the left face-off circle only to be caught by Kristopherson again. He whipped his stick back. The puck shot towards the top corner of the net.
Trapped under traffic, Raul couldn’t save it.
Read the rest on AO3 or FF.net
#slts update#beyblade#kai hiwatari#smells like team spirit#please let me know that I'm not shouting into a void#I'll keep updating anyway but it'd still be nice to know there's a reader out there
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lloyd thot thats driving me crazy :
is this his business? are there ads¿?
tell me he advertises
Hell no. Mr My-Reputation-Precedes-Me? He’s too good for all that.
Also my idea for Smells Like Team Spirit was more along the lines of sex is not at all Lloyd’s business, but maybe Steve was after the same target as Lloyd. You’ve been slowly eluding to wanting Steve to be more aggressive in bed, etc, to the point where it’s on his mind. Steve gets the idea seeing Lloyd that Steve could put this guy in jail and throw away the key, no problem. Steve holds all the cards there. He doesn’t look so different that Steve would think you were more into Lloyd than him, and he behaves like absolute trash-hole Lloyd. No chance you’d choose that over Steve, boring sex or no boring sex.
There’s a dinner negotiation/feel-out of the situation, and after that the threat deal that if Lloyd gets outta line, Steve takes him to jail (with a story that no one would believe anyway) OR Lloyd can be paid for his discretion. Steve is super specific about that—the money is for Lloyd’s silence, not the actual sex.
Anyway, that’s what I’ve got so far and I don’t know that the prequel would be worth writing. We shall see…
#ro answers#smells like team spirit#lloyd hansen x reader#steve rogers x reader#Lloyd Hansen x reader x Steve Rogers#seriously how did I get here#who came up with this#lloyd hansen fanfiction#lloyd hansen smut
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the team being so exciting about sam getting a response and hyping him up and then sam cashing in his issac cut. the whole team watching and reacting to the haircut like it’s the most important thing that’s ever happened to them. these boys have come so far as a team. jamie’s there’s a apart of it and so it will. everyone’s included in their little family.
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Oh my goodness, you mean there is Smells Like Team Spirit fanart that I haven't seen yet? This is so cool! I love how you did the falling feathers, and the details of the spine, and the tail!
And his pointy teeth in the mask!
DannyMay Prompt 19: Wings
Fanart for one of my favourite fics:
Smells Like Team Spirit written by UnluckyAlis
#smells like team spirit#phanart#criminal that I didn't see this when it was posted#this is so so cool#thank you!#I adore that of all my fics this is the one that gets fanart#everyone is so creative with Danny's mascot outfit!
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I’ve been wanting to make this edit for a while I just couldn’t be bothered to but now that I’ve made it I’m not sure if I like it or not:/
#foryou#tf2#team fortress 2#sniper#sniper tf2#tf2 sniper#tf2 edit#team fortress 2 edit#sniper edit#tf2 sniper edit#sniper tf2 edit#smells like teen spirit
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Hot Rod's Song: "A Letter To Eveyone Who's Hurt Me" - Chandler Leighton, "Mary On A Cross" - Ghost, "Pompeii" - Bastille
Overlord’s Songs: "We Found Love" - Rhianna, "Centuries" - Fall Out Boy, "Love So Soft" - Kelly Clarkson, "Biscuits" - Kacey Musgrave
Damus's Songs: "Smells Like Teen Spirit" - Nirvana, "Believer" - Imagine Dragons, "The Four Seasons - Summer in G Minor, RV. 315, III Presto" - Vivaldi
So I think these fit pretty good, there's a few of these songs I was unaware existed and I am subsequently writing them down for further research.
Things that I exactly ended up imagining:
Overlord just belting Love So Soft in the shower, fuckimg pink bubbles and shampoo bite mic and all
Rodimus walking home with that gray hoodie we all damn war in highschool and getting way too into Pompeii (inspired by like. One Tumblr post)
"damn why does Damus have the same music taste as me"
#divorce au#maccadam#transformers#songs#overlord#hot rod#damus#lately I've been damn obsessed with ''smells like team spirit''#camp Mithril Lake
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MERMAY XXVI
( maybe this is the final piece of the puzzle ? we may never know the core of the fog awaits you friend )
Fun fact : ever since she helped kanji just getting rid of the crystals to protective gear she also however had the flu and next week she stayed at home
after getting better she was having a stroll until she was kidnapped and was thrown into the TV by someone
and when she got into the TV world she looked around for several hours locating a lab cave filled with test tubes and many equipment until she found the room and she went in it
when she was near the experimentation table, she heard crying then she hid and when she poked her head out to see they were sitting on a chair near the experiment table so she swam to the person that was crying and it looked like....her? but they had a lab coat with her hat still intact and they're wearing overalls with a sweater underneath
"that can't be me...right?" and then it looked at her with beaming gold-eyes staring at her and then, it gets up and gets closer to her while she backs off away from it
"hello there naoto....heheheahahaheha!...."
She screamed and swam away from it while it laughed in the background and then she was now at a dead end and her shadow self closing into her holding a comically large knife so she closed her eyes waiting for her doom
this is naoto's shadow self, and it was about to kill her and gut her like a fish
until it gets shocked and falls down to the ground getting paralyzed
when she opened her eyes, it was yu with his gang smiling at her knowing she's okay
shocked she didn't know help was going to arrive soon but it did after her shadow self was chasing her...."are you alright naoto?" said yosuke
and with him saying that question, she cried crocodile tears hugging him in the process until her shadow got up and started shit talking so yosuke had to shut it up by beating it with the mace without hurting naoto
shadow naoto got pissed off so bad that they straight up transformed into their final form and bonked yosuke then he was lightly unconscious for several minutes
and after fighting naoto's shadow she joined the investigation team and got a persona before that she had a power nap during the fight
( also she's a royal blue double tail betta and she used to be not afraid of dead bodies and now she is lol )
#naoto shirogane#shirogane naoto#anime and manga#persona 4#persona 4 golden#she investigated several amounts of cases over people dying of the fog#and she has found several context clues that were probably burned when she was taking a stroll#and when she found out her evidence was burned by the culprit she was pissed#so the investigation team now having naoto go on a journey into the TV world and what they saw was shocking at least#when she was arguing about use care about bottle caps and how they should be treated good#and most importantly carrying the team she heard whispers and disgusting smells that she never smelt before#until the bones moved they shaked and shiver and pointed at the main core of the fog#as she swam last she realized something the bone rattling had stopped in the fog smelling disgusting turned into nothing#it body moved in a skeletal way it's fine and ribs were open with rotten seaweed it's tail reeks of rotten tomatoes and poultry#their teeth creeks whlie their voice is sore#their bones are blackened to look like obsidian and the most like Dread#while their body smells like perfume mixed with rotten flesh and whale#when she was curious about get frightened she realized something they look familiar... like this is someone from class that she met#some months ago before the murder.#wait a minute....this wasn't 'mother nature' at all or the fog this was someone's vengeful spirit mixed with this curse of nuclear dread#so she screamed in horror and said ''GUYS I DON'T THINK THAT'S MOTHER NATURE''#''THAT'S THE SISTER OF KONISHI-KUN!!!!!!''#they looked at her with horror in their eyes and they looked at the corpse spirit#they were right if she was the patient one of this fog#then who was patient zero? 'mother nature' herself#looks like we got to fuck around and find out#also I meant it's brittle ribs not that lol#mermay#mermay 2024#persona 4 naoto
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୭˚. ᵎᵎ content warnings: F!reader, 18+, NSFW, p in v, unprotected sex, dirty talk, praise kink, lovesick & possessive!kenji, reader wearing Ken's shirt, petnames, explicit words, explicit content.
୭˚. ᵎᵎ word count: 990!
Kenji loved it when you wore his t-shirts.
During his matches, among the euphoric, enthusiastic and hopeful stands, joining the wave of the crowd, which had an unusual spirit, he saw you wearing one of the countless t-shirts, which contained his name and number, — shouting for the team and for him — encouraged, even more, Kenji.
And every time you hit successfully and triumphantly, you turned around, pointed to the name written on your back, and shouted "that's my player!" — Oh, Kenji could fall even more in love with you, and he didn't know it was possible.
So, like, he appreciated all the photos the media posted, commented on, mentioned of you together, post-game, and the highlight, in Ken's eyes, was, again, the shirt you were wearing. — Sometimes, it was a shirt, correctly, in your size or one of thousands of his, it didn't matter.
But, nothing, faithfully, could be compared to the immoderate, cunning, contemplation that Kenji experienced when he saw you wearing one of his t-shirts, always when he felt like it, wanting to feel as comfortable as possible. — This was already considered routine. — Out of pure irony and contradiction, when they sounded like unreality, they seemed like they were made for you, he thought.
The huge, made of rich and enhanced tissues, mentioning the values it cost, and formidably showy Kenji T-shirts similar species of dresses on your body; making it fully, fascinating and so captivating. — And, noting comfort, you used only underwear under the dress; it was not even appeared, obviously.
And that, maddeningly, drove Kenji's mind crazy. — Disturbing him, without being able, nor having the opportunity, to concentrate on certain, and reasonable, things in front of his head; without caring about the impolite and indecent looks, after all, he had something better to consider, Sato fixed his eyes on your thighs. — He had his weak point.
And always in the morning, a little disoriented, missing you and, exaggeratedly, tired, with his physical and mental state set back because of the necessary appearance of Ultraman against yet another Kaiju, — upon returning home, he collapsed into your arms and caresses — Kenji found you in the kitchen; preparing something, humming and, softly, serene. — Of course, wearing one of his shirts. — Approaching, with heavy and slow steps, his muscular and vigorous arms snaked around your waist, holding you firmly.
It didn't take you by surprise, clearly, used to his warm welcome; it was clear that the warmth of his affection and comfort was valued. — Also, given the way Kenji needed your touch or, at least, your presence.
Saying "good morning, dear" and waiting to question him about how he slept; in response, the eldest caressed your neck with his nose, inhaling your pleasant and delicious smell, mixed with the fragrance of his perfume, that was stuck to his shirt, and let out a bitter sigh; perhaps, a little libidinous. — No, actually, it was definitely lewd.
Leaving you without an answer, and with a hint of concern, and intending to turn towards him, in an instant, hurriedly, Sato pulled your waist, and reading your thought, turned you around, facing the boy's exposed chest, and he threw you onto his shoulder with ease. — He didn't hear, he ignored, your cry of surprise, and headed towards the bedroom.
And, evidently, today, at this exact moment, it couldn't be any different.
"Holy shit." — Kenji swore, in a mixture of drowsiness and excitement, intoxicated by your scent, something that is deadly addictive. His breathing was rough, dull, so sudden. — "Ah, but you're so cute, aren't you?" — A question asked in a filthy way, with a slutty and breathless laugh, he couldn't help himself. — “My dirty girl, huh?”
Spread out on the bed, between pure silk and white sheets, surrendering yourself, giving in fragility and voluptuousness, deliciously, to your boyfriend; being completely filled by him and feeling insane waves of excitement. — The intense, and so delicious, inversions that you received left you crazy and, satisfactorily, even more, immoral. — And, making it even more interesting, at the same time, without surprises, Kenji's white shirt was on your body.
Buried in your pussy, compromising, bitingly, between the heat and tightness of your walls, which sucked his cock, and causing obscene noises and noises, wet by the room's environment, Kenji left himself thinking that you would be the death of him. — He choked, growled, when he felt another tightness coming from your little hole. — It was so erotic, so carnal, so fucking good.
"K-Ken..ji." — You stammered, you didn't even know how to pronounce his name correctly, and you were so breathless, desperate as you felt him insert his dick into you; cried out to him, pathetically.
"I love it when you wear my clothes." — He traced a line down your neck with his tongue, laughing with lust and sensuality, losing herself in pleasure once again. — "And i love fucking you while wearing them." — He articulated, listening to the wet noises of his heavy balls against your ass, and looking at your face, with a fucked and desired expression, with some tears on your cheek.
Your moans, pleas ran through Kenji's ear, and settled in his mind, equally, with screams, so thin that they seemed like meows, every time his robust cock reached that little spot that only he could and loved to reach; causing your nails to dig into his burly back, scratching him. — His beautiful little girl was still conscious of marking him, Sato laughed at the thought.
Every now and then, Kenji would move away from your neck, and, surprisingly, you would sob when you felt his brief absence, and his eyes, heavy with lust and appetite, would look at the connection between you and, pulling your hips and pushing, again, he had the sinful, and deadly, privilege of seeing your pussy swallowing his cock with pleasure. — Oh, even his eyes closed, sharply and rudely.
Kenji loved it when you wore his t-shirts.
#kenji sato#ken sato#kenji#kenji sato x reader#ken sato x reader#kenji x reader#kenji sato smut#ken sato smut#ultraman#ultraman rising
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Weeks of bad behavior from your lieutenant have you convinced that he can't get laid. You take matters into your own hands.
Ghost/fem!reader. Rough sex, a nearly submissive Simon, PIV, unsafe sex, pullout method, flimsy premise to explain gross fucking, ruined orgasm. This has been on my laptop for ages please take it. 2.5k
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It’s your breaking point.
Once you reach it, a strange calm comes over you. The mission is over, Price has finished taking you all to task for your failures, and Ghost has specifically taken you to task for your own—just like a typical man to notice the speck of sawdust in his Sergeant's eye and ignore the plank in his own. For so long (far longer than just the length of this arduous mission), the friction between Ghost and the rest of the team—between Ghost and yourself—has been building. Like two fault lines grinding alongside each other, there was bound to be a break somewhere.
You just hadn’t expected it to be you.
And you hadn’t expected it to be like this.
“Lieutenant, can I have a word?” you ask, walking damn near double time to keep up with Ghost’s steps.
“Negative,” he says. “Whatever it is, save it.”
“No can do. It’s important, sir.”
“Doubtful.”
“I insist, sir,” you press, pushing your speed into a light jog so that you can come to stand in front of him and block his way. He reluctantly stops, dark eyes blazing from behind his mask. He’s stripped down, gear abandoned but no less intimidating nor lacking in height or width. Still you keep your chin up, refusing to back down. Something has to give, and it won’t be you.
“Two minutes. Go, Sergeant.”
Your eyes scan the hallway. Here won’t do, even if it is night time and the base is quiet. You know that the quiet can be deceiving. Spotting the supply closet, you bound over to check that it is unlocked and—score. It swings open silently, the inside dark and smelling faintly of lemon-scented cleaner.
Ghost hesitates.
“It’s important sir,” you promise again.
You don’t promise that it will take two minutes or less.
Rolling those dark eyes, he sweeps past you into the closet, flicking the lightswitch. The overhead light hums to life, casting a tinny ivory glow over the room. The shelves are well stocked with supplies, most of which aren’t for cleaning but are typical office supplies instead. There is just enough room inside for a man to lay down if he wanted to.
You’ll have to test that to see.
“Take your cock out.”
Silence, for the length of nearly three of your heartbeats. Ghost’s head tilts, eyes narrowing where he stares down at you. He leans down a little as if to hear you better and asks: “Excuse me, Sergeant?”
You straighten your spine, refusing to be cowed. “You heard me. Your cock. Get it out.”
“Why the fuck would I do that?”
You raise your chin a hair. “The recruits have been talking. They say your bad mood is because you can’t get laid. I’m here to fix that, sir.”
“Getting your intel from recruits was your first mistake. Of many.”
“Either I have faith that you aren’t always this much of a bastard or I give in to the belief that you really are. For the sake of my own sanity, I’m choosing to believe the former.” You find a few pins for your hair in your uniform and begin pinning it back, keeping the extras tucked between your lips and talking around them as you prepare yourself to suck his cock. That strange calm is still over you, but beneath it you can feel your better judgment panicking. You’re propositioning your superior officer right now. This could lead to your discharge, and not an honorable one.
But something had to give. It was either your spirit, or your mouth.
You drop to your knees even though he hasn’t even reached for his belt yet, hoping to rush him along. His dark eyes follow you, and you see the heat in them. The fingers on his right hand twitch.
“Do you...want me to do it for you?” you ask, your voice a conspiratory little whisper. It’s the last little push he needs and then he is reaching for his own belt, undoing the clasp and opening it. He unfastens his pants. Beneath his jeans you can already see the bulge forming; proportionately huge compared to the man it belonged to. It made your teeth ache, like the thought of eating something sweet.
Maybe you were both crazy.
His cock is uncut, a dusky flush just a shade darker than the skin on the back of his hands. His girth is nice; his length is nearly obscene. It takes all of your self control to keep from outright balking at the size of him—though the weepy little cunt between your legs certainly is intrigued by the sight.
“Well?” he says. “Don’t just stare at it. Suck it off.”
You reach out and flick the sensitive head cruelly. He hisses, hips jerking away from your touch. “You don’t give the orders here, Lieutenant. If you want your dick sucked, you’re going to be nice to me, once and for all.”
“What?”
“You heard me. Ask me nicely.”
“Yer the one who begged me in here—!”
You let out a sigh. Drastic measures… leaning forward, your soft cheek brushes against the silky smooth skin of his cock. It twitches against you, burning hot. You turn and let your heated breath fan against it. For all his outrage, Ghost has grown perfectly still above you, not trying to find the perfect angle to slip his cock past your lips or anything else of the sort.
“Come on, Ghost,” you whisper, lips brushing against him. “I’m about to do something very nice for you. Isn’t it only fair that you ask nicely for it? I’m not asking for much. Just say…please suck my cock.”
“Suck my cock,” he says. Then, like a murderous afterthought: “Please.”
You sigh again and shift to stand. His hand is suddenly on your shoulder, pressing you back down.
“Don’t,” he says, sounding less like the prat he is. “Please. Go on. Will you?”
“You want me to?”
“Yes.”
“Yes what?”
“Please,” he says through his teeth.
Leaning back on your haunches, you place the softest, chastest little kiss on the head. He’s aroused enough that the foreskin is just beginning to pull back, and you let your tongue out to lap softly at the exposed head, listening to the way his breathing stutters and stops, the way the leather of his gloves creaks as he makes fists as his sides.
“Try to fuck my face and it’s over,” you warn him. “You might be thinking of how badly you need this—and I know that you do. But don’t forget this: I need it more. I need this more. If we’re going to work together with any semblance of civility, I need this. Do you understand?”
“No. But I get the gist.”
“Good enough for me.” You open your mouth and take the head past your lips, suckling on it. He lets out a harsh breath through his nose, cock jerking against your tongue. You can taste precum already, and you’ve barely done anything. No wonder he’s been such a bastard lately. Has he been fucking his own fist at all? God knows that you’ve spent more than one night with your pruning fingers buried to the knuckle inside yourself, hand over your mouth to keep from shouting Ghost’s callsign when you cum.
Leaning forward, you take more of him into your mouth, enjoying the heavy weight of him on your tongue. He is burning hot, smells and tastes faintly of sweat from the mission, but you don’t mind; living with so many men has almost given you a strange appreciation for the scent of hard work. Maybe Ghost’s most of all. You take him as deep as you comfortably can, but there are still a few solid inches outside the wet warmth of your mouth.
You work one hand down your pants and underwear, finding the sopping wet slit between your thighs. Using three fingers, you stroke yourself leisurely from hole to clit, soaking the digits. Above you, Ghost mutters a curse, head tilting almost curiously as he searches for a better angle to watch your hand move beneath the fabric of your pants. Removing it, you hold it up to show him the filmy slick drenching your fingers before wrapping that fist around the base of his cock.
“You get that wet just from thinking about sucking some cock?”
Your eyes narrow dangerously, slowly pulling back until just the flushed head rests on your tongue, wondering if he’s being mean enough that you need to stop and remind him of his manners. Apparently just the threat of it is enough; he lifts his hands in supplication, mouth twisting a little beneath his mask.
“If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything. Didn’t your mother teach you that, Lieutenant?”
It’s his turn for his eyes to narrow dangerously, an expression that would likely put the fear of God in a lesser man or woman. But with your teeth so close to his cock, you’re not yet afraid. Before he can open his mouth and ruin anything else, you swallow him down as deeply as you can, feeling the thick head press at the back of your throat, your jaw aching. You can taste yourself on his cock and the thought has you whining around his length.
“Fuck,” Ghost mutters. His hand touches your hair—not to grab, but just to pet. “Yer a pretty thing, aren’t you?”
You hum in delight at this unexpected praise. It goes straight to your soaked core, fanning the flames of the ache between your legs. You are a pretty thing, and you are glad he’s noticed. To reward his good behavior, you lean in until the head nudges the back of your mouth again. Tongue out, breath held, he slips even deeper into the warm channel of your throat. His ragged exhale is as sweet as a moan.
You give him a few more minutes of your mouth before you grow bored without your own satisfaction. Slipping him free, you work his cock in your slick fist and say to him, voice wrecked: “Time to see if you can lay down in here.”
Turns out he can, as long as he keeps his knees bent a little. Straddling his waist only emphasizes to you how obscenely thick he is, and you have to stand to shuck your pants and panties down and off altogether. You cast a brief glance toward the door—there is no lock from the inside—but no risk means no reward.
“I don’t have a condom. You’ll have to pull out. Tell me when you’re close, alright?”
“Alright.”
His hands reach for you, gripping your wide hips as you straddle him again. You plant one hand firmly against his chest but hold no illusions that you could actually pin him in place if he decided to move. You lower yourself to brush your soaked slit along the length of his cock, back and forth, until he is soaked in your arousal.
His mouth opens to say something smart, something that will have you gritting your teeth, but instead you rise up onto one knee and sink down on the head of his cock. It’s all you can take before that pinch of pain strikes you, freezing you in your tracks. His mouth is parted beneath the balaclava, wet, quiet pants that dampen the fabric with each breath. You take your time stretching yourself open, thighs burning in time as you lift and lower yourself over him again and again.
“Touch me,” you demand of him.
For all his earlier mouth, he seems content to be obedient now, his gloved fingers searching for the space where you both are joined. The leather traces along the seam where his cock disappears into your cunt before following your parted lips up to your clit. His thumb circles the aching bud with a firm touch, and it helps you ignore the pain as you take another inch of him inside.
You ride him like that: both your hands on his chest feeling the way it hitches as it rises and falls, hips jerking and swaying as you find the angle that suits you best.
“Lean back,” he demands. “I want to look at you.”
“No time,” you pant. “It’s been way longer than two minutes, Lieutenant. I do hate to be wasting your time.”
“Fucking hell,” he sighs, eyes rolling.
“Don’t forget to tell me when you’re close.” He grunts in acknowledgement, his fingers going sloppy between your thighs. That’s not good enough. You bark: “Lieutenant, do not forget to tell me!”
He laughs.
You go to lift off of him, but his laughter turns belly up and dies so quickly, morphing into a strange, desperate little sound as he stops working your clit and grips at your hips, pulls you down more firmly against the cradle of his thighs.
“I mean it,” you say through your teeth, taking one of his wrists and prying a finger loose until he has no choice but to let go or have it broken. You guide his hand back between your legs. “Don’t cum before me, either.”
He sits up, jostling you, forcing you to change your angle. His mouth comes down hard against yours, fabric on skin, but you don’t turn him away, lapping at the cotton like it’s his tongue as you kiss through the mask.
Feeling things slipping out of your control, you press him back down with both hands, pinning him to the floor. The sound of flesh on flesh is loud in the enclosed space. At the apex of his thrusts he brushes against some deep, untouched space inside you that has you digging your nails into him, feeling that ache in your belly writhe and twist into something fearsome.
“I’m close,” he grits out.
“Not yet,” you hiss.
“I said I’m fucking close—“
“Wait for me,” you growl. Then, knowing that you can catch more flies with honey, you soften your tone: “Please, don’t cum yet.”
He shuts his eyes. “Shut up,” he mutters, scrambling for control, fingers digging into your thighs, unsure whether to pull you closer or tear you off of him. “Shut up, shut up, shut the—fuck up.”
It’s your turn to laugh, feeling your release right there, coaxed forward by this pleasurable torture you’re inflicting on him. Never did you think that seeing your superior officer suffering like this would give you so much satisfaction.
“So close,” you whisper, the tips of your fingers tingling with it. “Simon, I’m gonna—“
When it bursts, your teeth snap closed around a whine, jaw tight as your cunt clenches around him—
—and he jerks you off of him, sending you sprawling against his lower thighs as his ruddy cock twitches and spurts pearlescent seed, one dexterous hand wrapping around the shaft as he jerks himself off through it even after ruining your own. You stare, gobsmacked at his audacity, pussy still twitching and clenching around empty air, the stolen pleasure leaving behind a vicious ache.
“You bastard,” you mutter. You bat his hand away, gripping his cock and beginning to jerk him off. When you smile, it is mostly teeth, something feral and mean. “Let’s try that again.”
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Dirty Laundry
Summary: Life with two toddlers has taken a toll on your sex life for the past few weeks, but after a surprisingly calm morning, you and Javi find a creative solution to solve your problem.
Word Count: 2.8K
Pairing: Husband!Javier Peña x Wife!Reader (no use of y/n)
Warnings: SMUT (18+), unprotected p in v sex (do better, but also, who am I to say?) vaginal fingering, paise kink, a breeding kink so dangerous that you may get pregnant just from reading, creampie, cum play, a loud washer and dryer, no actual laundry accomplished, domestic girl dad Javi, you'll always be famous
A/N: idk who unlocked my cell while I was ovulating, but once again I have escaped, and once again, we're makin' babies. I think I've convinced myself I don't know how to write anything else, and for that, I am genuinely sorry. If wanting to give Javier Peña a football team worth of kids is a crime, then lock me up and throw away the goddamn key 🤠
Can be read as a standalone or as a part of the Never Too Late Series!
For as much as you loved your daughters, it was safe to say that for the past two weeks, your pair of rambunctious toddlers had been doing very little for your sex life.
Your 4 year old Lucy had been going through a phase of having nightmares every night, and somehow ending up in you and Javi’s bed no matter what you tried. That, combined with trying to potty train your 2 year old, Elliot, (who was nowhere close to being the breeze her older sister it was when it came to the matter), on top of preschool, work, and life in general, you and Javi had barely gotten so much as a kiss in, let alone some quality time together.
It had been your hope to start trying for baby number three, but after 2 months of negative pregnancy tests and another month of complete chaos, despite your best intentions, “trying” had very much taken a backseat in your mental to-do list.
But this morning when you woke up, it was almost as if a wave of calm had washed over your house to reset the state of disarray you had been in the past few weeks- Both girls had slept through the night in their own beds, had woken up in good spirits, Elliot asked to use the bathroom multiple times, and both had been happy to play in the living room together quietly as you worked on catching up on some much needed laundry.
So calm, in fact, that Javi was almost worried when he came downstairs for work to hear near silence, apart from the occasional giggles from the girls as they arranged their Fisher Price Little People in their Play Barn and the washer running in the background.
“Hi Daddy!” Lucy cooed, toddling over to her dad, wrapping her arms around his waist as Elliot quickly followed behind, perching on his leg like a koala.
“Buenos días, niñas. (Good morning, girls).” Javi grinned, squatting down to kiss the wild, sleepy curls of his daughters’ heads, still slightly confused by the tranquil state of the house. “Where’s Momma?”
“Washing stinky socks.” Lucy giggled, pinching her nose and scrunching her face, pretending to have smelled something bad.
“Yeah, stinky socks.” Elliot echoed, sticking out her tongue.
“Oh yeah? Is it because my pollitas (little chickens) have stinky, smelly feet?” Javi teased, wrapping his arms around the girls, pulling them close to his chest as he tickled their sides, the three erupting in laughter and giggles.
“What’s goin’ on out here, huh?” You grinned, stepping out of the laundry room with your arms playfully crossed against your chest to see your husband and daughters in a tickle tackle pile on the living room floor.
“Daddy said we have stinky feet! Daddy’s got stinky feet, not me and Elliot.” Lucy protested.
“I think you and Daddy both have stinky feet, Lucy Lu, and your dirty laundry proves it.” You smiled, watching Javi give one last big kiss to each of the girls before pushing up off the floor with a grunt, making his way over to you. “Good morning, Mr. Stinky Feet.”
“Hey, c’mon now. I can’t have you all gangin’ up on me.” Javi pouted through his smirk, wrapping his arm around your waist as his lips softly met yours, his words sweet and low as they danced against your skin. “Good morning, Hermosa.”
His kiss lingered just long enough to send butterflies swirling through your stomach, biting down on your lip to try and keep your heart beating any faster than it already was. You stood there for another moment, eyes locking with his as the grip around your waist tightened just subtly enough to hint his mind was in the same place as yours.
You were finding a way to finally have sex this morning.
You could feel the arousal already beginning to pool in your core, swallowing hard as Javi tilted his head and raised his eyebrows at you while his hand slid further down your waist towards your ass, trying to devise a plan for the two of you to be alone long enough to do what you had both been so desperately craving these past few weeks.
As you turned your head back over your shoulder in search of ideas, a devilish grin spread across your face, looking back to Javi to gently tug on the maroon tie dangling from his neck, twisting the end through your fingers.
“I think I really need help with the laundry before you leave for work.” You mewled, leaning in to press another kiss to his plush lips, followed by another on his cheek and neck, Javi letting a soft groan rumble in his chest.
“Oh Fuck, baby. What do we do about the girls?” He asked quietly, trying his best to keep his composure as the dark brown of his eyes grew hungrier with want.
“Snack and a movie? There’s already a baby monitor out in the living room, and if we put on “The Little Mermaid”, it should buy us enough time.” You nodded in reassurance of your own idea, already growing antsy with anticipation.
“God, I love you.” Javi smirked, giving you one more kiss and a firm squeeze of your ass before breaking away towards the kitchen so you could execute your plan.
“Hey girls?” you called, making your way towards the living room where they were back to playing, “Daddy needs to help Mommy with some, um- laundry. So if we put on “The Little Mermaid”, can you show us what big girls you are and let you watch the movie all by yourselves?” You asked, doing your best to play up your request.
“Yes, yes, yes!” Elliot squealed, clapping and stomping her feet. “Wittle Mermaid!”
“Okay, go get your blankets and sit on the couch and Daddy’s gonna bring you a snack to watch the movie with.”
“Yay! Movie time, movie time!” Lucy shrieked as the girls ran to go grab their things, plopping themselves on to the respective corners of the couch. While you searched for the VHS in the entertainment center, Javi returned from the kitchen with two much bigger than needed bowls of Teddy Grahams, turning on the TV as you pushed the tape into the receiver and pressed play.
With the bright blue Disney logo appearing across the screen and your daughters both happily snuggled with their snacks on the sofa, you and Javi gave each other the silent nod of approval, slowly backing away towards the laundry room while the girls sat in content and entranced silence.
After one last peek, you carefully closed and locked the laundry room door behind you, quickly followed by turning on both the washing machine and the dryer, trying to do yourself any favors you could by drowning out any suspicious sounds.
“Good?” Javi asked once more for reassurance, feeling his slacks get tighter and tighter around his crotch by the second as he waited for your response.
Without a single word, your lips were crashing into his, a messy dance of tongues and teeth ensuing between you as your bodies bumped against the laundry room counter, limbs tangled together in a frantic race to remove clothes.
“Fuck, I missed you. Missed this.” Javi groaned, helping you slide your top over your head and unclip your bra as he nipped at your neck, pushing your back against the dryer and caging your body under him.
“I know, baby, me t-too.” You whimpered, reaching out to undo Javi’s belt buckle, shoving his pants down to his thighs, followed by his boxers, freeing his cock as it slapped against the dark hairs on the happy trail of his stomach. “Missed having your big dick inside me.”
“Fuck.” Javi swore under his breath as you reached out to stroke him, swiping your thumb over his weeping tip to rub the precum up and down his shaft as he shoved your the waistband of your pants and underwear down your hips just far enough to let them fall to the floor around your ankles.
As much as you both desperately wanted to take your time, worshiping every inch of each other’s bodies until you had nothing left to give, you knew time was not on your side. After a few more strokes, you pulled back, letting Javi snake his hand against your body to slide between your legs, the slightest graze of his fingertips already making you shutter with need.
At this point, even after the few weeks it had been without Javi inside you, you were wet enough that you could have taken him without any warm up, your core dripping with your arousal to the point it was smearing the inside of your thighs with its shiny coating. But even with your cunt soaking wet and time working against you, Javi couldn’t help but drag his fingers through your folds, curling to push up into your tight hole and prod against your g-spot.
“Jesus fucking Christ, you’re so wet. This all for me, Momma? Missed me fillin’ you up with my cock? Missed me fucking you full of my cum, huh baby?” Javi growled, his words shooting straight to your cunt, making you clamp down tighter around his fingers and your clit throb with intensity.
It had been a minute since baby making had been at the forefront of your mind, but his question set off something animalistic in the both of you, knowing that right now could give you a chance at baby number three that you had been wishing for.
“Y-yes, Javi, fuck- want you to fill me up, baby. Want you to fill me up until you fuck a baby into me.”
It was then that Javi couldn’t have been more thankful that you had turned on the washer and dryer to try and drown out your noise, because the groan he let escape from his parted lips was much louder than he intended.
But then again, there were few things in this world that turned him on more than you begging him to knock you up, so what did he expect?
Scooping his arms under your thighs, Javi hoisted you on top of the dryer, your ass hitting the cold, vibrating metal with a thud as your lips collided again with desperate ferocity, muffled moans escaping from your mouths.
“Dirty fuckin’ girl. Want me to knock you up again, Momma? Give you another baby?” Javi smirked, reaching to line his cock up with your entrance, swiping his tip through your folds to collect your slick and coat it along his length before he pushed inside you, sinking deeper and deeper until he bottomed out, hips flush with yours.
Words couldn’t describe how much you had missed the sweet stretch and sting of Javi’s fullness, each inch of him feeling better than the last, sobbing out as his tip kissed your cervix, all inhibitions of self-composure completely tossed out the window. Still sunk deep in your cunt, Javi’s hand shot over your mouth, stifling your cries in his palm.
“Shhhhhh, I know, Osita. You gotta keep quiet though, baby.”
You nodded frantically in compliance, Javi’s hand dropping to grip around your waist as you tried to catch your breath. “M-move, Javi, please.” Your whimpering request borderlining pathetic with how badly you needed him.
“You promise you’re gonna be a good girl and keep quiet?”
“Mhmmmm. I promise, baby, please.”
With that, Javi’s hips began to snap, dragging his cock in and out of you at a dangerous pace, coating the walls with the sounds of the wet sounds of your cunt and slapping skin, muffled by the washer and dryer.
“Oh my God, Javi. Fuck. Fuck, you feel so good.” You whined, locking your legs behind the small of Javi’s back, keeping him as close to you as possible as he fucked in and out of you. You draped your arms around his shoulders, fingers burying themselves in the dark curls at the nape of his neck.
The closeness had the hairs at the base of his cock rubbing deliciously against your clit, adding to the tension beginning to build at the base of your spine, both of you knowing it wouldn’t take long to get where you needed to go after weeks without being able to have each other like this.
Javi could feel it too, his balls beginning to tense with each pump, using every ounce of self control to keep from preemptively spilling into you, his hands digging into the soft flesh of your hips and thighs, holding on to you like his life depended on it.
“Jesus, Fuck- Fuck, I missed this tight little pussy so much. Gonna cum so deep inside you. So deep it’s gotta fucking take. God, you’re so fucking sexy when you’re pregnant. I swear I’ll give you as many babies as you want, Hermosa.” Javi babbled, biting down on his lip as he pounded into you, reaching one of his hands down to circle at your wet, puffy clit, aching to be relieved from all the built up tension.
At this point, you were so drunk on pleasure that you could barely remember your own name, feeling your orgasm begin to build through every inch of your body in a way that had you seeing stars, digging your fingernails into Javi’s shoulders and burying your face in the crook of his neck to keep from crying out his name, forcing yourself to whisper incoherent sweet nothings against his skin.
“P-please, Javi. F-fill me up. Oh shit- Fuck, baby, I’m so close.”
Javi’s thrusts became sloppier and more erratic, fingers rubbing your clit with the perfect amount of pressure to coax your orgasm out of you before he followed suit, gritting his teeth and furrowing his brow in intense concentration.
“That’s it, baby. Cum all over me. Soak my fucking cock before I fuck you full of me and knock you up. C’mon, Momma.”
Suddenly, your orgasm crashed through you, lighting your body up like a goddamn Christmas tree, every inch of your body radiating with bliss as you clamped down around Javi’s cock, biting down on his shoulder as you came to try and stifle your cries.
Javi was only moments behind you, letting out a low grunt with the final sutter of his hips as he came, coating your walls with his warm spend, fucking it into with every ounce he had left until he had milked himself dry.
Your bodies collapsed into each other, rising and falling in sync with heavy breaths like you had just finished the last mile of a marathon and collapsed at the finish line, damp and sticky with your sweat.
As much as Javi didn’t want to pull out, he could feel his cock beginning to soften and the mixture of your spend leaking from your hole. Refusing to let a drop go to waste, he pulled out of you, a groan rumbling low in his chest as he wrapped his hand around his length, dragging his tip up through your folds and collecting the cum that had been dripping out. Taking the wet mess he had gathered with his cock, he pushed himself back into you, slowly thrusting in and out of you, a devilish smirk spreading across his face at the absolutely obscene sound coming from between your legs.
“Promise me,” Javi gulped between pants, finally pulling out of you again, “Promise we never go this long without having sex again. Holy Fuck.”
“Promise.” You couldn’t help but giggle in agreement, coming down from your blissed out high. “God, that was the longest two weeks ever. Don’t know why we didn’t think of this sooner.”
“Because we’ve been sleep deprived and exhausted, and our little monstros (monsters) have been giving us a run for our money.” Javi chuckled, reaching behind you to grab a towel from the cabinet above the dryer, quickly rinsing it in the sink before wiping you up and helping you find all of your clothes.
“Are we crazy for wanting another one?” You asked, looking down at your stomach, thinking about the ramifications of what you had just done.
“Maybe. But you drive me so fucking crazy, we may end up with 10 before you know it.”
“Javi! Dear lord, we are not having 10 kids, you psycho.” You laughed, playfully slapping your husband on the shoulder.
“Stop being so hot and I’ll stop knockin’ you up.” Javi smirked, raising his eyebrows at you as you rolled your eyes at him knowing damn well you’d have a whole army of his kids if he really wanted.
“You’re ridiculous, I hope you know that. Alright, you need to get your ass to work and I need to feed the gremlins before I drop Lucy off at preschool. Let’s go, cowboy.” You grinned, playfully smacking Javi on the ass, giving him a quick kiss as you made your way towards the door. “I love you.”
“I love you too, Osita. I gotta remember to call my dad on the way into work.”
“Call your dad? Why?”
“To see if Abuelo can take the girls this weekend so you and I can catch up on a lot of laundry.”
Taglist:
@chaotic-iguana @rhoorl @bbiophiliaa @purpleprincess75 @angelofsmalldeath-codeine
@pedrobaby @fatima-marisa @beboldbebravethings @poodlebae @kittenlittle24
@3sriracha @jungchloee @perennialdoll247 @prettyinpunk85
@partyofone3413 @harriedandharassed @pedrohoe04 @theorganasolo
@endlessthxxghts @beware-my-thorns @missladym1981 @milly-louise
@jay-zzle @the-one-with-the-grey-color @persephone-girl @bitchesuntitled
@pedropascallvr @millennial-teenybopper @vee-bees-blog
@hopplessilse @mxtokko @its-nebuleuse @msmorningstaarr
@amyispxnk @honeyedmiller @mountainsandmayhem @picketniffler @burningnerdchild
@copperhalfcent @theoraekenslover @bloodyinspirationaldemon @vee-bees-blog
@samgirl4life @pigeonmama @survivingandenduring @itsokbbygrl @javierpena-inatacvestnotifs
@purpleprincess75
#pedro pascal#pedro pascal character fanfic#pedro pascal fanfiction#narcos fanfiction#pedro pascal character#javier peña narcos#javi pena#javi peña x reader#javier pena#javier pena fanfiction#javier pena fic#javier pena fluff#javier pena imagine#javier pena narcos#javier pena smut#javier pena x f!reader#javier pena x female reader#javier pena x reader#javier pena x you#javier peña#javier peña fanfiction#javier peña smut#javier peña x f!reader#javier peña x female reader#javier peña x reader#javier peña x you#joel miller smut#pedro pascal characters#jose pedro balmaceda pascal#pedro pascal fanfic
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Hi Angie,
I just read your latest fic and i just want you to know that it's amazing! I really love it. Punk louis with a soft heart for his golden boy 💋 Looking forward to reading about those two again in the near future (hopefully!!) 😉
Hi angel! Thank you sooo much 💜 they are cute, aren’t they? I’m already looking for a new prompt to continue their story 👀 if you send any possible one, send it my way 🫶 I want to explore more of their dynamic and maybe we’ll learn if Louis has more piercings (he does, he does) and how punk he actually is
Thank you so much again!
Smells like team spirit on AO3
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New SLTS chapter
“Miles has a point,” Jace murmured, helmet dangling from his fingers as he ran his hand over his buzz cut. “Antonio is a player, he’s not had much coaching experience.”
“Great, so you’ll hang me out to dry?” Raul asked, picking at the paint on the top pipe of the goal. “Because if you play like you’re the only person on the ice, I’m the one who will suffer.”
Miles made a derisive noise, folding his arm over the net as he leaned forward. “You’re being judged against one other guy tonight, Fernandez. We forwards are up against 24, and Defence are up against 16. You’ll be fine.”
More sounds of agreement as Miles shone a light on the true scale of the match. Next to Kai, Graham shook his head, disappointment radiating from him but he didn’t speak up. Landon stared at the floor between the twine, jaw clenched tight while Mathias watched, eyes meeting Kai’s for a prolonged moment before jerking away.
Kai wondered at that. Did Mathias expect him to jump in? Pick another fight with Miles when Miles had a point and the team knew it? Kai didn’t have any sway with this team. He wasn’t the de facto captain. He wasn’t even on the first line.
AO3
FFN
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Danny judges the Family Business
Danny: How many kids do you have? How many vigilantes are in Gotham right now?
Batman: ... you know how many.
Danny: Seriously, your grandson too? Couldn't stick to just yourself?
Flash: Can we not?
Danny: ... I mean I sorta understand the clone thing makes it murky water, but COME ON!
Superman: *sweating*
And finally, finally, they have enough of the lectures. They know Danny's identity, they know of his parents, his sister. So they ask.
Batman: Would you not tell your parents if you needed help.
Danny: I chose not to tell my parents! My dad has his own section on the news if he's out driving, I don't want them on my team!
JL: .. What?
Danny: I mean, yeah, they'd be helpful on the government research side of things, but... You guys obviously looked into this, they can't aim for shit most of the time! They cause more property damage than any of the ghosts do in the longterm. My dad would probably shout out my name each time he saw me on patrol. Besides, they've calmed down the whoke vivisection thing, they're more like... safari people now. If the ghosts aren't actively attacking, they watch and make notes to study behavior.
Wonderwoman: And your sister? She helped you did she not?
Danny: Yeah, when I was 14 and freshly dead? Believe me, the moment she had an out we both took it. She's studying out in California now, and she's only stepping in for emergencies. Like, end of the dimension emergencies, not 'Oh I've been stabbed again' emergencies.
-----
I find the idea that Danny lectures the JL about the younger heroes and like, making sure they aren't prioritizing hero work out of duty really funny. This undead boy took up his own duty when the only other option was his parents and their inventions (one of which actually killed him by opening a door to another dimension) and felt obliged to deal with the ghosts for both the living and the dead's sakes. He opened the portal, he'll clean up the mess while keeping everyone safe. Sam and Tucker got to help, but once he got control of his powers (maybe once he gets the crown and authority in a Ghost King setting), he's offered them outs as well. They take them slightly. They step in for the heavy hitters, but generally Phantom flies solo; besides JL business. Maybe Dani joins in, but she's her own free spirit so it's not like she sticks around long.
Danny wants to know that all these younger heroes are there because they wanna be, not sacrificing a normal life because of feeling pressured or needing to live up to the expectations of their guardians/mentors.
And I know the JL care about these kids, Danny just ain't sure (He can glance at the BatClan and just smell the death and drama) - and he wants to be. These kids better have a healthy work-life balance, so help him Ancients.
#dp x dc crossover#dp x dc#dc x dp#dp#dc#dpxdc#dcxdp#dp x dc prompt#dc x dp prompt#danny phantom#ghost king danny phantom#justice league#batman#superman#flash#wonderwoman
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Spencer and sunshine!reader have to go undercover as a couple at like a bar or something to catch an unsub!!!! The team would be like “make it believable!”…but they’re literally not pretending. Just acting how they usually would with more ‘free-spirited’ hands. 😭
“Just make it believable okay?” Was the only instruction Emily had given you both.
You’re currently in a bar with Spencer, a strawberry vodka in your hands as he sips on a coke.
“Spencer, are you scared to put your hands on me?” you ask when your shoes brush the toes of his, trying to get Spencer to hold onto you as you scan behind him for the unsub.
“You know that I’m not,” he only steps a little closer, his hand falling to the middle of your back.
You don’t say anything for a moment, trying hard to find the man you and Spencer were sent to ensnare.
The unsub you’re trying to catch has a thing for voyeurism that turns into him wanting to insert himself in a couple’s dealings which had a funny way of turning into a very sex and murder type of party.
The minute your eyes lock with his, Spencer’s hand falls into the back pocket of your skin tight jeans. Even through the thick denim you can feel the warmth of his palm.
“Too much?” he licks his lips as you shake your head, eyes still locked on the unsub. “Do you see him?” you nod again and Spencer smiles.
“He’s near the restrooms, blue polo and khaki pants.” you whisper the information hoping that Emily hears you. There’s a bit of static then her affirmative and you nod.
“Look up at me,” Your heart races when you look up and find Spencer’s eyes darker than usual. He leans down, nose brushing yours and you’re only vaguely embarrassed by the surprised squeak that left your lips the moment Spencer’s hand groped your bum.
“Spencer,” you gasp, lips brushing his. You can feel your heart in your throat. All you can smell is him. That godforsaken cherry and spiced chocolate cologne that he wears filling your head.
“Sweetheart,” he murmurs, eyes leaving yours for a brief moment. “Is he coming this way?”
Who is Spencer talking about?
“Blue polo,” he reminds you, it takes a moment for your eyes to land on the moving man but when they do you nod. “Good, kiss the corner of my mouth.”
You find your voice then, “Are you usually this bossy?” Spencer smirks but instead of an answer he just taps beneath your chin forcing you to tilt it further up.
“Would you prefer it if I do it?” Spencer Reid is on his own private mission to end you, you’re sure of it.
“Yeah,” when you tell Penelope of what happens later on tonight, you’ll be sure to leave out how breathless you were when you agreed.
The kiss is chaste and sweet, a quick little nip. It gives the unsub enough time to reach you both and try to put his hands on you before Spencer is pulling out his badge and you’re attaching handcuffs onto his wrists.
“FBI, we’d like to ask you some questions.”
You can’t look anyone in the eye when you walk back into the precinct, flushed and flustered and fighting the urge to touch the corner of your lips where Spencer’s had been.
#spencerreid#spencer reid#spencer reid one shot#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid drabble#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid blurb#spencer reid fluff#spencer reid fic#dr spencer reid#spencer reid x black reader#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x you#spencer reid x yn#spencer reid x y/n#spencer reid x sunshine!reader#post prison!spencer
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Look at this photograph
(joel miller x f!reader)
The half sequel (Chapter 1.5) to Never made it as a wise man
WC: 3.5k | Part 1 | Other fics | Rating: 18+
Summary: you open Joel’s dick pic and (after examination) decide to give him a call
Note: it’s me ya boi (gn), back with more divorceddadrockdilf!joel bc you guys get me. i know y’all want them to fuck, and I want them to fuck too. unfortunately, this flowed through me first, and I am merely a vessel for the spirit of buttrock joel.
so, until they get their freak nasty on, please enjoy this as a chapter 1.5, with gratuitous dick pic art critique and crankin’ it over the phone <3 don’t worry, he’s still a lil pathetic. mistakes and bad jokes are all on me.
Tags: au no outbreak modern joel, divorced dad rock dilf joel x f!reader, picks up right where ch.1 ended, dick pic descriptions, alternating pov, dirty talk, phone sex, masturbation, it’s all just phone sex, but edge yourself through it with fond memories of ch. 1, still crackish, but i am still dead serious about it being hot so idc
inspo playlist i found on spotify: Divorced Dad Rock: BANGERZ
thanks: to @hellishjoel for hosting the #hotdilfsummerchallenge and to everyone who enjoyed part 1
@gothcsz i promise fuckboy!joel is cookin, he’s just in the crockpot rn. he’s gotta tenderize like a white lady’s pinterest recipe for pulled pork.
* i tried to tag everyone who wanted more, but if you don’t wanna be here i’ll remove it <3 or if i missed you and you want to be tagged next time pls let me know
“Oh, Jesus Christ,” you blurt out after opening the message from Joel. The vulgar dick pic sends a prickly worm of arousal slithering down your spine.
Without thinking, you tilt the phone down toward your chest, and your eyes shoot up like you’ve got to make sure nobody saw your naughty message. Warmth blooms on your cheeks as the flash of embarrassment starts to dissolve. You don’t need to hide.
You’re in your bed, in your apartment, wearing Joel’s grubby Creed t-shirt. The one that smells like Degree Sport and a Jiffy Lube break room. You're free to look at all the dick pics your heart desires. And that’s what you’re going to do.
The wiggle of bashful energy turns into a squirm as you shift your hips, seeking a comfy position in bed. The t-shirt bunches up under your back and you wonder if the unique Joel scent of it will linger on your pillow beneath your shoulders. You knew pilfering the shirt on the way out the door was a good move, and now you get to enjoy your trophy. It makes it feel like the broad-as-a-barn-door DILF himself was still close enough to touch you.
It gives you another bright shudder when you think about the noises he made when he came in your hand earlier. The disappointed grunts of “fuck, wait” and how he tried to choke down the throaty groan that came from deep in his chest. Fuck. The perverted gremlins that have a permanent residence in your mind have been roused by the digital dick, and now they chitter and squawk at you. More! More! More!
You reopen the message, and seeing it gives you another rush. You save the picture to your phone storage. For your personal collection. Mine now, big boy. Your chin starts to dip towards your chest. It’s like you’re giving your phone the Kubrick stare with the ghost of a smirk. You’re free to take your time with this one. And you can be as much of a creep as you want. That makes you sigh softly and sink deeper against your pillows.
Before this afternoon, it was titillating when Joel would pop up in your mind's eye with his slutty slo-mo scenes. The one where he was bent over your car's engine like Megan Fox in that Transformers movie. Or, that damn happy trail tease with the t-shirt-sweat-rag move. You had just enough imagery to let your dirty thoughts take the wheel.
And, god, you had a good production team in your mind for projects starring Joel. Adding this will give the team a whole lot more to work with. You can hear them crashing around your conscious like the Animaniacs on the Warner Brothers lot. Horny chaos goblin mode activated.
Now that you have time to study the image, from the luxury of your microfiber sheets and lamplit bedroom, you let it get pervy. It’s your first real, lingering look–earlier today, you were so busy trying to rile him up in his jeans that you didn’t even pull it out.
It had somehow been even more delicious that way. Having him all needy and unable to stop himself from making a mess in your hand. And not just the noises, but the erratic thrusts into your tight fist? The heat of his pulsing length as he forgot himself? Yeah, you’re gonna remember that one.
But now? Now you need the visual. If the devil is in the details, you have a new neighbor with horns and a tail.
You zoom in on everything. Holding your phone closer to your face than necessary, like how do we enhance this bitch?
And holy shit.
Drool pools in your mouth and between your legs. You have the knee-jerk reaction to lick your phone.
You can hear Joel’s voice from earlier today. All husky and grumbly, arguing that you really were a slut for him, like, “You are, aren’t you, though? You came all this way in this excuse for a shirt just to see me?” He might be touch-starved enough to cream his jeans, but you just know he’s got a nasty mouth in bed, and you’ve got to find out firsthand. Soon. There’s no reason not to, right?
You pause when a flicker of reasoning tickles the back of your neck.
You’re back to looking in your review mirror in Joel’s driveway. The last-ditch attempt at checking your ego before you marched to his front door like a Halloween hoe bag version of Betty Crocker.
You had told yourself you weren’t trying to fuck your (almost) friend’s (sort of) dad. Told yourself there was nothing to pursue, and even if there was, you wouldn’t bite.
You like Ellie. She’s been (mostly) welcoming to you. You told yourself not to fuck anything up with the only person that’s got a single one of your jokes at your new job.
You were just bringing some food as a friendly gesture. The fresh visuals to add to your spank bank reel were supposed to be a harmless bonus. Okay, maybe it was a stretch to say you had rolled up to Joel’s driveway with pure intentions.
And it was an even bigger stretch–when he added that third finger while he finger fucked you on the kitchen counter—wait, no. It was an even bigger stretch when you had told yourself you probably weren’t his type anyway.
Like, that guy? With the fridge full of Coors Banquet? With those ugly Oakley sunglasses that you know are featured in his only picture on social media that isn’t a car or truck? The guy with all the words to Buckcherry’s “Crazy Bitch” and Puddle of Mudd’s “She Hates Me” memorized?
Nah, deep down, you knew. You knew there was no way that middle-aged bachelor would turn down any action. But you hadn’t planned on actually making a move, especially not a handjob in the middle of the kitchen.
That’s on Joel for leaving the door open while trying to rub one out to some bimbo on Brazzers. And for barking at you in that sexy, angry voice. And for teasing you with the bulge in his oil-stained jeans. What were you supposed to do?
Something must be really rotting in the logic department of your brain.
Hey! The gremlin voice in your head is still shouting at you. Hey!! Why are we not tasting that dick yet?!! You’re back from your daydream and the excuses you crafted for your behavior, back to laying in your bed with Joel’s dick pic emitting a bright glow in your hand.
You still do want to lick the screen.
Fortunately for your immune system, you control your tongue. The critical part of you expels a sigh when you zoom out and take in the picture.
It’s undoubtedly a nice cock, but the image as a whole? Yikes.
Why do men have to be so fucking thick? And blunt? Wait, now you’re just describing the slightly blurry boner lighting up your face. Thick as in dense. How can men be so dense?
No imagination or creativity. No patience.
You shake your head slightly, scoffing. No wonder you caught him hunched over his cracked phone screen. It was probably the first video loaded on the only site he had saved.
No sweet, sweet, buildup, setting the mood, or getting cozy. Just whippin’ it out midday or snapping a photo in some ratty sweats.
Like you’ve never been that touch-starved or down bad?
You ignore that voice to continue your art critique.
The photo you sent is… sexy.
Sultry. A flirty tease. It says, “Look who has your shirt? Am I wearing it in bed? Do you think I'm wearing anything else?”
It’s all implied in the look in your eye and the picture's composition. The tease of the soft curves on the underside of your breasts, asking if he remembers what they felt like. Your hand bunching up the shirt, asking if he remembers the slide of that fist around his cock. If he remembers those fingers, the ones you sucked his sticky spend off of.
Such delicately crafted imagery. Personalized erotic fine art.
But men are so crude about it. He sees your tasteful, sexy pic, and immediately, the best his caveman brain can come up with is: send her ur dick! STAT!! Hard cock! Now!!
And, of course, he did. Taken in the dark with the flash on, making ominous shadows in the background. His old charcoal gray sweats are pulled down just enough to expose everything he’s offering.
The color is slightly blown out from the flash, and it’s a touch blurry where his phone didn’t autofocus quickly enough. His hand looks like it’s straight up, just choking the base of his cock. It’s jarring.
But that’s really the “man” of it all, right? Nothing subtle or demure about a rock-hard erection jutting towards you, reaching like it could get to you on its own if it just could get a little bit harder. No, there’s nothing coy about the raw thoughts of a man with no blood left in his brain who’s just aching to get inside you, either.
And fuck if that doesn’t start to override your critical analysis.
The glare from the flash reflects in the beads of precome rolling down his rosy tip. Mouth wateringly delicious. Your blood rushes to your pussy, filling your tender sex with heat and a deep, needy itch. It makes you dopey and silly. Not cock drunk, but like, dick pic buzzed.
You know it felt sizeable in your hand earlier, but you aren’t an expert at estimating size from a through-the-pants handjob. You try to recreate your own grip around nothing to estimate the size.
You giggle to yourself when you realize you're just a woman in her bed staring at her hand, jerking an invisible cock. The horny goblins aren’t amused, though. They’re sick of the daydreaming and distractions. They’re picking fights with the rest of your mind. Throwing rocks and sticks, shrieking and hissing.
The part of your brain that was griping about how men used to write love letters and respect the art of romance is getting quieter and further from your faculty for caring. You can hear its muffled shouts, and you assure that voice that you won’t give it all up this easily. Then, you completely tune it out.
The last brain cell with a complaint has you rolling your eyes. You have to be ovulating or something because it’s wholly debased the way this guy is doing it for you.
He’s just shameless with it.
You sent him tasteful underboob, and he gives you jumpscare dick-in-the-dark! How is this supposed to escalate? He gave it all up immediately! You send another picture, and he sends you his money shot? What’s he gonna do to give you more? Send you an asshole shot? That one makes you snort. You bet he would do it, too, if you asked.
Oh, that gives you a better idea. He’s not getting another picture from you at all. You tap on his name and tap the call icon. Of course, this horny motherfucker answers immediately. You aren’t sure it even rang before you’re connected to his porny bedroom voice.
“What are you wearing, dollface?”
“I already showed you. Call me dollface again, and I’m hanging up.”
You can hear his breathing like he’s got the mic on his phone in his mouth. That would typically drive you fucking nuts, but right now, you wanna hear his heavy breath against your ear and feel it hot against your skin.
“All right,” he speaks slowly, distracted. You know why. “You wanna be my slut, instead?”
Fuck. That has you throbbing between your legs, but he doesn’t get to know that yet.
“I already told you,” you keep your voice low and soft, “you don’t get to call me a slut for you, not with your behavior.” You strain, trying to hear any other noises, but his mic is probably clogged with dust from his shop or lint from the pocket of his sweats. You can just hear his fucking breathing.
“What behavior, baby?” he rasps.
“You always jump straight to sending a picture of your cock?”
You hear the soft snort through the phone. Followed by a deeper, throatier noise. A noise that makes you go cross-eyed and has you running a hand down to your naked lower half to tease yourself.
“You always steal a man’s clothes after you come on his fingers?”
You don’t really care what he asked. His voice makes your tongue go numb. Your mind goes blank. You start slowly, coating your own fingers in your slick arousal and drawing circles with a light touch.
You hum a noncommittal response into the phone.
“You look good in my shirt, baby, fuck,” he trails off breathlessly. The idea of you in his clothes gets him too close.
You don’t answer, and he’s too far gone to wait and tease.
He’s been wound up since you took off this afternoon, and it doesn’t feel like a coincidence that you sent him that pic when he had just gotten into bed.
It had taken ages to get his brother out of the shop this afternoon, and then Joel completely fucked up when he mentioned you and the lasagna. He had to begrudgingly host Tommy for dinner when he couldn’t come up with a better excuse than saying, “I’m gonna need you to fuck off so I can deal with the aching balls I’ve got from your surprise visit scaring away the woman I had my fingers knuckle deep inside.”
But when he was finally alone, it was like fate; your text came through right after he flopped onto his bed. His semi-stiff cock had sprung to full mast at the sight of you. The shirt he knew he didn’t fuckin’ lose, your soft curves, and the expression on your face. Like a vixen. Your PG-13 tease would do more for him than any X-rated video.
Knowing you were thinking about him and that you wanted him to know? That had him throbbing. He already knew from the desire in your eyes earlier today that you wanted more.
He could swear his fingers still hold the lingering flavor of your wet cunt. The visceral memory of you has him on edge. When he wraps his hand around the base of his cock, he has to pause, holding firmly in place. His body screams and aches for release, but he’s determined to keep it in check. He doesn’t want to blow his load until he gets a response from you.
He fights his urges, trying not to fuck his own fist in a frantic race to come.
But, fuck, it’s difficult when he can imagine the sounds you’d make as you sank onto his cock for the first time. The face you’d make. Your tight, wet walls hugging him just right. Like, he’s where he’s meant to be.
And the way you would look, bouncing on top of him. Your tits, your blissed-out face, the way your soft lips would part when you called out his name and cried for more.
Those lips.
The way he’d love to see them swollen and slobbering around the base of his cock. Fuck. His hips buck reflexively, and he hisses out a breath through his clenched teeth. When his phone lights up with your name, he answers before it can make a sound. You’re so bold. He likes that. It plasters a saucy grin on his face.
And now, with your breathy voice crackling through his janky phone speaker, he’s not gonna last long. You've got him losing his composure for the second time in one day. His whole body is rigid. His toes flex and snap unconsciously, and his jaw tenses. He hears your soft moan, and his thoughts are overflowing. He has no filter left.
“Yeah, baby? You moaning for me?” His hips punch up into his fist, and he gives in, allowing himself firm, severe strokes. “You’ve got me so hard. You moaning for my cock?”
You are so not gonna answer that one. If the next words out his mouth are, “Yeah, you like that?” you’re gonna block him for that. But it is undeniably hot to hear him already so worked up. You just know he’s gonna be coming all over himself again for you, and that really does make you moan just for him.
Your noises earn you another growly groan from Joel that you’d kill to hear again. The more uninhibited his noises are, the louder you get in response.
“You using your fingers, or you have a toy?” his question is punctuated with a grunt.
“Mm, just fingers,” you purr, finally granting him an actual response as you roll your hips. Having Joel on the line gives you a heady sense of satisfaction. Wondering what’s going to come out of his filthy mouth next gives you a shiver of anticipation.
“I know that sweet pussy is just achin’ to be filled again.” Correct.
“Yes.”
“S’right, baby, I know.”
Joel whimpering on the phone for you is absolutely going to get you off. Your hips chase your own fingers. You switch your phone audio to speakerphone and drop it on your pillow so you can use both hands. Pinching at your own nipples as if it were Joel’s big hand under your smuggled shirt.
“Tell me,” he pants, “who do you need to fill it for you?”
“You, Joel.”
“Fuck,” he chokes out, “you wanna ride this cock, huh baby?”
“Mhmm.” Bingo. Right again. You wish you could feel the pressure of him inside of you, massaging and soothing away the agony. The weight of his body atop of yours, so solid and secure. You can just about feel the pressure of his pelvis grinding into you. The friction from the coarse curls at the base of his cock getting you closer and closer.
“Know you’d do so good,” he cuts himself off with a low noise, “so damn sexy.”
“What else would you do with me?” You wanna hear it. For your own fantasy and to know what he’s into.
“I’d have you taking me down your throat til you’re crying on it for me, fuck,” a primal noise erupts from him.
Face fucking. Of course. You can’t deny that when he says it, your body responds instantaneously. Your pussy floods eagerly at the idea, and your cheeks burn hot from the visual he gives you. You swallow down your moans, and you can imagine the weight of him on your tongue and the strain of trying to swallow around his cock.
“You wanna come down my throat?” As if that isn’t a fucking siren song that would make him steer a fleet of ships into a cliff? Your salacious words are too much.
“Shit. Yeah, baby, wanna watch you swallow for me.” You let all your moans and gasps flow freely for him to hear. “I’m so fuckin’ close,” he can’t stop the words from spilling out his mouth, “let me hear it, baby,” he can’t stop his pending bliss either. “Please, baby, I can’t, oh f-fuck,” he cuts himself off with another primitive grunt, and that’s precisely what your cavewoman cunt wanted to hear.
“Yes! Yes! Yes!” The horny goblins chant out loud this time. You can envision sweaty, pleading Joel lurching toward a reckless, full-body climax.
You’re far from grace when the crude sounds he lets out turn you into an uncivilized beast. You hear him gasping, growling, and whining for you. It plunges you into a staggering orgasm. Rolling waves of ecstasy leave you panting and sweating.
You lie in bed, chest rising and falling beneath the Creed logo. You’re left stunned at the intensity. A dreamy smile spreads across your face, and warm contentment, like honey, pours slowly over your muscles. Relaxing you as your tension softens and you turn to pick your phone back up.
Why was it so wholly consuming just to listen to him? Imagining the mess he made again,
because of you.
Maybe you’re just made for each other.
You and Joel.
Oh, god. You should start listening to Alanis Morissette and Evanescence and trade your car for a 1990s-era Toyota 4runner and a pack of Marlboro Smooths. Really lean into matching his freak and the divorced alt-rock vibes.
You laugh softly into your phone before a deep sigh possesses you, and you nearly fall asleep. You stretch and smile, letting your heavy eyelids rest.
He’s muttering something at you, catching his breath from the stress of being that fucking horned up for you all evening. And the overexertion of lasting long enough to hear your sweet cries of release.
“You’re unreal,” his smoky voice rings with awe. “Got me shooting loads like a fucking teenager.”
You snort at the juxtaposition of his tender voice and crude comment before ending the call with a whispered, “Goodnight.”
It shouldn’t make you smile.
But he’s somehow such an enticing disaster. A cliche lonely bachelor, a cocksure idiot who knows he’s got a big dick and a generous guy who was willing to fix a stranger's car.
You shouldn’t be trying to justify it, but you know he had you figured out earlier.
You may be sated tonight, but you won’t be able to rest.
Not until you get your hands on that DILF – or rather, your pussy on that dick.
divider by @cyberangel-graphics
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