#slutshaming the vulcans

[yel-halansu]

Nam’uh ka-ashausu, tr’y’dzhar-tor’uh.

Be gay, do crime

Suggestion by @lionesshathor after this post! Vulcan calligraphy in India ink over a watercolour background vaguely shaped like a heart, because as we all know crimes in Vulcan are just having feelings and holding hands with Terran boys 👀 Print available here: https://society6.com/yel-halansu

[marlinspirkhall]

Vulcans, moments before accusing someone of impropriety.

[satanickpanick]

waving at a vulcan is like blowing them a kiss

[yel-halansu]

Scandalous 🙊💖😗

Spirk as vintage romance comic books banned by the Vulcan High Council for ‘inappropriate content’

Twitter | Instagram | Prints

[yel-halansu]

Best purchase I've ever made in my life! 💜🖤🖖

T-shirt design by @thesadchicken | BUY IT HERE

[marlinspirkhall]

- Vulcan mind melds

*gets inside your mind*

* makes you gay*

*leaves*

[yel-halansu]

Lerash-halan t’T’Lana fi’kau-yut, il ashaya kafeh Vuhlkansu.

The arduous journey of T’Lana on the road to enlightement, or Vulcan Love Slave.

A cover for what is obviously the greatest work of literature within the Trek universe…👀👀👀 see the uncensored version and buy the print here: https://society6.com/yel-halansu 

[yel-halansu]

Sarek pls

[yel-halansu]

*scandalised Vulcan noises*

STAR TREK DISCOVERY (2017 - )

2x01

[yel-halansu]

ARE YOU TELLING ME THAT SAREK BUMPED UGLIES WITH A RELDAI AND NEVER MARRIED HER

*whispers in scandalised Vulcan*

Does the thottery of the S’chn T’gai men know no bounds

#I looked it up on Memory Beta and their marriage was actually annulled... but still this is so much funnier

dkbsjdbdjs wait hold on, is sybok a bastard??

[yel-halansu]

👀���🙈

Hmm

[yel-halansu]

Don't leave this in the notes OP

[lionesshathor]

Ok there's got to be a snazzy Vulcan brandname we can put on there... Maybe something about Solkar the Slut because this is a pleasurable mixing of earth and Vulcan? Do puns and alliteration even work in Vulhkansu? What would be short enough in Vulcan script to print on a chocolate bar wrapper? Would there be "proof" ratings like we use on alcohol? (I.e. 70% cacao dark chocolate would be "70 proof")

Ok time for some word barf

Tipsy T'hy'la

Just "chocolate" but in Vulcan calligraphy incorporated into a cocoa tree

Solkar's Pride

Solkar's Chocoloco

It's Pon Farr Night at the Vulcan Nightclub

V'tosh Ka'tur for a Night

It's not my fault, I was drunk

Human-like intoxication for fun and profit

Everybody loves Zefram

Zefram Chocrane

S'chin T'gai Choc

Denial of pleasure is illogical

Oz'esta fiesta

T'amanda's favorite

Komihn, come in!

Save a sehlat, ride a human

She thinks my ears are sexy

Choco-lok (with double-ridged squares?)

Shon-ha-choc

Human females crave this and so can you

Surak won't mind

Designed a fake chocolate brand called Screw Surak's Teachings for Vulcans who want to have fun 🖖

[yel-halansu]

So basically after the Sundering, the Vulcsns lost all contact with the ones that left and assumed they were all dead (but of course they weren't and they settled on Romulus). The Vulcans went about their business as usual, not worrying too much about space travel, until a huge fleet of ships shows up from out of nowhere a few hundreds of years later and attacks Vulcan. These were the Romulans obviously, but the Vulcans didn't know. Eventually the Vulcans managed to defend themselves but never figured out who it was that attacked them, and most of their early space travel is motivated by this event. Then they go on to make first contact with other planets etc, but they always researched everyone they encountered before making direct contact because they're super weary of something like that happening again.

I also want to believe they're responsible enough to check for stuff like bacteria and disease before passionately entwining their hands with the first human they see

Thinking about First Contact like...how did the Vulcans know that they weren’t carrying diseases, even something as commonplace as harmless gut bacteria, that were deadly to humans and in an immunologically naive population could’ve like wiped out half of all life on earth?