#skippin to a fight

[reasoningdaily]

she's right that lil skip move, that all you need to see to know it's gon be brutal and fast

[momo-shut-the-fuck-up]

So i ve done the main story in infinity nikki and im gonna stop playin now, before i squeeze the game dry of content and have nothing (new) to do on release.

Time for a lil review/thoughts post

I m not gonna review every single mechanic in the game, simply things that stood out to me or that i wanna talk about. I also wont add more images, i kinda want ppl to see the world for themselves... i ll share more when the game comes out tho.

There s a lot of text under this. Tldr, i like the game i think it's a solid, enjoyable experience with a good gameplay loop, the story isn't for me, and i'll keep playin of course. And u should try it too if ur device wont blow itself up tryin to run it.

Dress up

The bread and butter of Nikki games... it's good as usual. Game doesn't shy away from long skirts or coat tails or complicated ballgowns just cuz nikki can run and jump and dash now and i'm very happy bout that. There's some clipping issues once in a while, but it's nothing major and the clothes we do have in the game are lovely. There s an evolution system for some of the sets, which makes em a diff color.... usually they can evolve once, but i saw Three extra evolutions for one of the UR sets and that scares me. Bcs to evolve them u have to craft the suit again. So u have to pull 4 copies of a suit to max it out..

Combat

Game's definitely succeeding in its quest for being cozy. There's no real stakes, combat isn't difficult in the slightest but i do welcome it- super simple but it's pretty fun regardless. The boss fights were surprisingly creative and fun for what they are, it's just unfortunate that you have to do them more than once or twice (crafting mats)- but they do change what the boss does so it's different depending on what mat u are farming for... and u can claim double or triple or however much stamina u got-le of the mat after u complete it once. So that s rly nice.

Exploration

I actually think it's really really good. Again this isn't a difficult or complicated game, not yet i guess... but with the major goal being "get new clothes" and "take pretty pictures maybe", the open world feels actively engaging to participate in. There's collectibles everywhere, little challenges you can do that are diverse but quick, styling battles, collecting everythin from animals fur to bugs to fish, and allll of this brings u closer to that never ending goal of woo more clothes.

However even if a challenge doesnt give you a blueprint, it's still just. Really Nice to exist in this world. It's very whimsical, as expected of Lilith, and the world has a combination of realism and cartoon artstyle that is just soso appealing to me. It's genuinely how i would've imagined miraland to look in 3d. Shame it's not the same miraland we know..

Story

Hmm... silly is one word i could use for it. Cute also. The story isn't doin anythin bad per se, and i did start skippin dialogue near the end w the pieceys because i want to keep at least Some part of the story for the game's release... but i get the gist of it, and it s just not my thing.

It feels like a story made for children, and it definitely would get a G rating. Easy and simple to follow, there's moments of tension or sadness sure but with the antagonist bein a literal babie lookin cutey fairy with a grown man's voice, or the creatures that i'm interacting with are a bunch of. Fuckin weird lookin big eyed balls of fabric that look closer to plushies than somethin Alive... it's all so silly and dramatic sometimes i can t help but cringe.

Part of it is a me problem, if u just open ur heart and free urself from the cringe the story is fine. It's just a little too kiddy for me and i so desperately hope it won't stay like this forever. My prayers might be answered though, there's a whole war beyond the borders and we have refugees around... shit's lookin bad for Umbrosa.

Other things i noticed that i liked:

The effect on nikki's skin when it's raining, she actually has water dripping down her face... its so cool

Momo capes are actually kinda neat ngl. Especially cuz the fucker follows u around everywhere, at least i can bedazzle him

Npc models look really good im a fan. They do suffer from "everyone is very beautiful" syndrome, which makes some of the npc villains look/sound ridiculous, but they have kid-teen-adult-elderly versions of models (i never see teen models in these games! Its cool!) And some body variation. The grandmas look so lovely i cry

The dark skin tone is really dark, and it looks quite nice and natural.

The lighting engine in this game is just rly good in general. God bless UE5

The edges of the map where there s forest, which u obv cant go thru, the forest is made to be darker, thicker.... i m a huge fan of this idk y. It's not just *invisible wall in front of an open field* nopee cant go there lets explore that area later tee hee. And it looks good to boot.

Camera function is p robust, has more options for changin brightness/saturation/contrast etc which i feel Shining Nikki lacks.

Some of the creature designs are so good man i looove themm <3.... the pieces are awful tho. Ok creature design is a hit and miss sometimes but the stray hatty? Peak. All the weirdy fashionable animals? Peak.

Bein able to quick switch thru ur saved sets while in the overworld is real neat

Oke that was it. Bye

[miheartsedthings]

Part Nine

SFW ModernBily x FemReader

Summary: Tensions rise as the student body starts accusing you and Billy of being involved with Molly's disappearance. At the same time, you're sick as a dog and being haunted by a waking nightmare.

Warnings: ANGST, mystery, anxiety, missing child

Words: ~6,000

Eyes follow you in the hall, and like never before you feel seen by the entire school. Eating lunch alone feels like being a single fish in an aquarium full of peering eyes, and after only a couple minutes, you can’t stand it. It’s just as well because you have no appetite. You spend the hour in the hall, leaning against your locker with a book, trying to study, and find yourself re-reading the same paragraph over and over. Your mind is filled with Molly. Had she come to the party alone, and thus left alone? Surely, someone had to have been with her. 

“Hey.” 

You lift your head from your book to find a boy you vaguely recognize. Thin and pale, his copper hair cropped and pushed aside. A handsome nose splits his face, and his round-rimmed glasses balance at the fine bridge of it. He’s smirking. 

“So like, where’s the party house?”

“Excuse me?” 

He chuckles. 

“You know, the hideout.”

“I…I don’t.”

He steps up closer, making you closeyourbook and step back. 

“Look, I’m not judging you. In fact, I think it’s pretty rad when a girl’s willing to fight for her man. But you two can’t just keep her all for yourselves.” 

His tone makes your skin crawl, as well as his proximity, which backs you against your locker. 

“Could you like…back the fuck up?” you say softly. He laughs. 

“Oh man, you’re more interesting than I thought.” He looks at you with a solicitous gleam in his eye. “Is she tied up?”

It’s then that Billy yanks the boy by his thin shoulder to send him stumbling back. 

“Didn’t catch that,” he says, staring at the boy “Say again?”

The boy hesitates, staring back into Billy’s menacing gaze. 

“Sh-” he laughs, stepping back to free himself from Billy’s grip and shove a hand through his puppy-soft hair. He smiles, looking back and forth between the two of you, light returning to his eyes. 

“Sure,” he says “I mean, I just want in, is all. On the whole thing you got with Kellerman.” 

Billy gives the boy such a long stern look that his smile fades. He looks at Billy with an expression full of fear. He stammers, saying he doesn't want any trouble. Billy cocks a grin, which freezes the boy in his tracks.

“Yeah?” Billy asks. “What would you do with her?” 

The boy smiles again, a cautious energy returning to his face.

“Typa shit we shouldn’t say in front of her.” he says with a chuckle. Billy shrugs.

“She can take it. Come on,” he says “What…you’d fuck her?” 

He takes a step forward, which makes the boy step back. Then the boy laughs nervously, his eyes keep flicking away from Billy, who relentlessly stares him down. 

“Uh-” 

“Hm?” Billy interrupts “What? Don't get shy now, tell me how you'd do it.” 

The boy is against the other lockers now, having stumbled back, he's chuckling still, a nervous rattle though he won't look at Billy, who's stalking closer to him, crushing him with an aura of menace and anger that overwhelms the smaller boy's whole being. The boy stammers saying something you can't make out from across the hall, and Billy answers. His words are muffled under the bell, but the low rumble of his voice makes it clear his words are a threat. Just as footsteps and voices are filling the halls, the boy trips, sliding sidelong against the lockers for a moment with new horror in his eyes. 

Billy gives him a shove which sends him running, then returns to you, regarding the book in your hands. 

“Skippin lunch?”

“What did you say to him?” you ask. He shakes his head, the anger and disgust obvious on his face. 

“He talks to you again, let me know.” 

You hesitate to agree. The excitement on the boy’s face gave you chills knowing what he was imagining. Molly Kellerman tied up in a basement somewhere. A play-thing for whatever boy got invited over. It turns your stomach again, and along with the nausea came a dull swell of pain in your head. 

“This shit is making me sick.” you mumble, turning to retrieve your books for your next class. “Why would he…” your voice fades and you put a hand on your locker, your nerves rattling. 

“Hey, take it easy.” 

You try to breathe as Billy touches your cheek. 

“You're hot”

You chuckle.

“Is now the best time-”

“No, dingus, you're fucking burning up.” 

You touch your own forehead. 

“Am I?” 

“Go see the nurse.” 

“Its fine. It's just all this…who'd she come to the party with the other night? Did you see her with anyone?” 

He shrugs, examining your face. 

“What'd you eat today?” 

You shake your head. 

“Nothing I guess…but people knew she was there, someone had to see something-”

He gets down close to your face, his expression tense. 

“Stop talking about it. Barney’s gonna find her or he won't. Eat something.” 

You search his eyes. 

“You don't care at all?” 

“She ran off. Obviously. Surprised anyone sticks around this bumfuck town. Not surprised everyone's creaming themselves over it because nothing happens here. But fuck it, either way. You gotta fucking eat.”

“I can’t!” you say, and Billy groans in frustration as you close your locker and start walking to class. “Billy she’s gone, and maybe I’m being dramatic but I don’t think it’s just…something’s wrong.”  you clench your stomach. 

When you look at Billy he’s a little red in the face and you know he isn’t listening. He’s too angry to care about Molly or hear your concern. You turn to him. 

“Ya know…you’re really good at only hearing what you wanna hear.” 

He looks a little taken aback by this, and searches your eyes waiting for more of an explanation, but, having arrived at your classroom, you simply walk in and sit down at your desk. People are watching, whispering to each other just low enough to keep their words from reaching your ear. The whole situation makes you nauseous and you can't think of eating. 

During class, you ignore the stares of other students, trying hard to focus on your work. Still, you can't stop thinking about Molly. Billy apologizes in the class you share by holding your hand under the desk and not nagging you to eat. In fact, he asks nothing of you, not even getting upset when you bring up Molly again. You ask if there's anything he remembers about that night that seemed odd but he simply shakes his head. 

You drive home in only a swell of metal music. No talking. Your head swims. Billy wears his sunglasses and you start to regret his silence. Your eyes linger on him, your head against the rest, your hand makes a lazy journey to his thigh, the denim warm against him. He glances at your hand's gentle touching, then reaches over and touches your chin, his thumb brushing over your cheek. 

When you get to the gas station, he pulls you in for a kiss that swells your head. As you pull back, you search for his eyes behind the shades and find your own reflection. 

“Hey” he says, his tone a low warning. “Don't run away from me.” 

This gives you pause, his tone so serious. You blink. As a result of your silence, he grips you, his hand under your chin. 

“When I'm talking to you…” you realize he's talking about the way you left him after the incident in the hall “You hear me?” 

Your heart sinks and your stomach twists. Billy knows how demanding he sounds, but he must demand. Being polite only sounds non-committal on his part and when it comes to you, he's 100% committed. He has to protect you, and since you sometimes act in ways that are contrary to your wellbeing, sometimes it means making sure you obey him. You can't be ignoring your needs and refusing to eat. You can't throw yourself away when you get distracted. 

“Billy…” you say, but your head is cloudy, and you have no energy to fight his controlling nature. Your eyes close as a wave of nausea sweeps over everything. 

“Just eat something for fucks sake.” 

He pulls you in and kisses your forehead before kicking you out of the Camaro and peeling off. You walk the short distance home with your mind buzzing, and later, eating dinner, you force down several spoonfuls of red beans and rice before nearly being overcome by nausea and retiring to bed early. When you open your eyes, you're looking at the figure on the street. She's slim and her long legs are nearly as ghost white as the long T-shirt she wears. 

Then, you find yourself in bed again. It's morning, and your head is still cloudy. 

“Baby?” Mom coos at the table “You okay?” you look up. When had you gotten to the breakfast table? Your teeth taste clean and you're wearing proper clothes. But when did you get up? When did you dress? You blink a few times and rub your eyes. 

“I'm…I'm…” 

“Eat something” mom says, pushing your plate closer. You chuckle at the familiar refrain and pick up your fork, managing a couple bites of potato and egg. You try to remember the steps of the morning, your usual routine, and come up empty. Yet you remember the dream. The girl on the street staring up at you and how she seemed to glow.

Then, you're standing on that same spot on the street, under the lamppost right where she'd been. You’re hit with a rush of Deja Vu and shake your head. The morning is cold, dense fog hugging low to the ground. 

You turn and look at your bedroom window. She was here. Right here where your feet are standing. A honk makes you jolt and you spin to see Billy in the Camaro, he gives you a perplexed and impatient look, gesturing for you to get in the car. You do, the motion of your body feeling heavy as you sink into the seat. Immediately he touches your forehead. 

“What the fuck are you doing just standing here?”

“I..” you cover his hand with your own “what time is it?” 

“You look terrible” Max chimes in from the back, startling you again. You cover your face with your hands and Billy reprimands her for her comment. 

“I'm fine,” you say, “I slept weird last night.” 

“Nightmares?” Max asks, wedging herself onto the armrest. Billy snaps at her to get the fuck out of our business but you break up the squabbling quickly. 

“I'm fine!” you announce “It's fine, I ate this morning, can we leave, please?” 

You’re trembling by the end of this and roll down your window for air. Billy's holds your hand as he drives, glancing at you over and over. When you stop to drop Max off at the middle school you’re surprised when she leans over your window. 

“Feel better,” she says, before sailing off on her skateboard.

The gesture makes you smile. 

“She's a good kid,” you say to Billy.

“She said you look like shit.” 

“Yeah,” you laugh, “yeah, she did.”

You arrive at school and Billy opens your door for you. He does it every morning but you'd never really noticed what a sweet gesture it was until now. You lean against the car once you're out, giving your head a chance to clear. 

“You sure you're alright?” 

You look at him, the concern he tries to mask under a veil of indifference is given away by the line of worry between his eyebrows, and the way he stares, appraishing your face, probably trying to calculate how little you slept. 

“It'd be nice if you could hold me for a minute.” 

You say this assuming he won't. He doesn't usually comfort you that way in public, and you’d given up on asking. Yet you need it now more than anything. To feel that solid sense of something of which he was made up, and know he’d shelter you in times that mattered. Like now.  He  searches your face, then to your surprise he hooks an arm around your shoulder and pulls you in, tucking your face into his neck. You curl against him, comforted by the smell of his smoke and the woody cologne he favored. He holds you a while, offering his warmth, and maybe it's the fog covering the two of you that makes him feel comfortable enough to linger with you there. You feel him dig out a cigarette and light it as you close your eyes, feeling him inhale and exhale. He hums a few lines of a melody you don’t recognize. 

“My head is spinning,” you say softly. 

“Shoulda stayed home.” He says. You wrap your arms around his waist. 

“And miss this?” 

Your words are much too sentimental. Cheesy. Yet he doesn’t tease. He presses a quick kiss to your temple, and you can hear the distant chatter of other kids making their way into the school. You imagine that somewhere among them is Molly. You imagine she’s come home. Called back by the beacon of the whole school’s collective worry. Then you remember the ghost on the sidewalk in a burst of fear.

“I had such a weird dream,” you say, “Feels like I didn’t even sleep.” 

He goes on humming, smoking and holding you, and its the perfect thing. A few more long moments go by before he flicks the butt of his cigarrette to the ground and crushes it. 

“Come on,” he says.

You go with him, content to be led because the moment you do move, the nausea returns, and everything, from the pressure of the fog, to the weight of your backpack makes it worse. Only his presence works to soothe anything. So you cling, and he allows it, accepts your fingers laced through his without the slightest complaint. A rarity. A gift. Inside, the day is a blur and you find that you keep running into people in the hall. Apologizing time and again and earning dirty looks. You keep away from the boy from the day before, but it's clear what happened between him and Billy has made its way around school. 

It scares you to imagine how many people actually think you two have Molly Kellerman tied up somewhere. Also, you keep realizing you’re walking the wrong way. Between every class your body wants to steer you toward the auditorium. For what reason you can't say. You just keep stopping yourself with your hand on the door to the stairwell closest to it. Then, just before lunch, your name is called over the PA system. 

“Report to the principal's office immediately.”

A chorus of jeers erupts in your class while the teacher shushes them and excuses you. Your hands are jittery on your way to the office, your stomach queasy. You knock on the principal’s office door. 

“Come in.” 

Inside, Sheriff Hopper stands beside Principal Drisk's desk with his hands on his belt. He watches you linger near the door, nervous and lightheaded, shielding your eyes from the light from the window behind them, burning intensely. Principal Drisk sits with his hands clasped on his desk and gives you an expectant look. 

“All the way in, Ms. L/N” 

You leave the doorway, closing the door behind you and inching forward. The room is musty and everything from the carpet to the crown molding is a different shade of brown. 

“Have a seat,” he says. 

You sink into the stiff chair in front of his desk, your eyes on the decorative baseball at the edge of the desk. The principal clears his throat and you look up at him. 

“Nervous?” 

You hesitate, then shake your head. 

“You look it.” He adds.

You shake your head again and he sighs. 

“Here's the thing. We've been told some disturbing things about you. You and that Hargrove boy.” 

You stare blank-faced and he clicks his tongue, shaking his head. 

“The two of you are dating, correct?” Hopper asks, rather reluctantly. You nod, eliciting more disappointed noises from Principal Drisk. 

“A poor decision. I must say," he says "When your family moved here I expected more from a girl with two hardworking parents. I know they probably go this differently where you’re from…”

The name placard on his desk is gold, reflective, and in it you see the ghostly white figure of the girl from the street standing behind you. Your heart jolts and you look over your shoulder to find no one standing there. Your body goes cold. 

“Missy, are you listening to me?” The principal’s stern voice draws your attention back to him. His jaw is set tight. “This is serious. The things we’ve heard in regards to you and that boy and Ms. Kellerman-” 

“You were there at the party together.” 

Sheriff Hopper interrupts the principal’s rant, you look at him, your eyes stinging from the burning light, your stomach a knot.

“We didn’t do anything to her.” you say. “And we weren’t together. We were there and she was there. Separately.” 

The principal opens his mouth to speak but Hopper steps up, sitting on the edge of the desk. 

“Listen. We know right now you feel like you need to protect him, but you don’t. You’re a good kid. There’s no reason to get yourself tied up in something like this, something you know is wrong.” 

The world sways and a wave of nausea makes you close your eyes. 

“He didn’t do anything.” you insist, your body straining with the effort. 

You fight the urge to get snarky with them. Hold your tongue for the sake of making Billy look better. The two men look exasperated, the principal especially. 

“What if it were you?” Principal Drisk asks, his voice trembling “Wouldn’t you want the girl in your position to care enough to speak up?” 

As he speaks you’re shaking your head, exhausted because they won’t believe you. 

“Billy and Molly were seen sneaking off together,” Hopper says, twisting a knife in your side. “And you went there looking for the two of them. So, we know you were in fact there with her.” His face hardens as he focuses on you. “You were upset with her. That’s natural.” 

I look at him through shaded eyes. 

“All they did was kiss,” you say “And he apologized.” 

“You fought with your friend after that.” Principal Drisk was red in the face, “What was that disagreement about?” 

Irritation burned through you then, stoking the urge to yell at them to leave Billy and you the fuck alone, instead you lean forward, your elbows on your knees. 

“We didn’t take her,” you managed, your heart in your throat “She ran out that night and…I don’t know, someone must have seen her leave. She had friends there! Did you ask them?”

“Right now we’re asking you,” Hopper says.

“Why did you and Nancy Wheeler get in that fight?” 

“God,” you groan, leaning back in the chair, your head swirling. The music of the party thumps in your skull, Molly’s smeared lipstick an electric shade of pink. She ran by and Billy and you behaved as if she’d never been there, too caught up in yourselves to wonder. She’d been crying. You pinch the bridge of your nose. You try to recall the fight with Nancy and it feels so stupid now. She doesn’t like Billy and it's the simplest most high school thing a pair of friends could ever fight about. In the moment, compared to the seriousness of the situation, it feels completely silly and you let out a dry little chuckle. 

“Is this funny to you?” 

Principal Drisk’s eyes are humorless. Colorless. 

“I don’t remember,” you say, “We fought about something stupid.” 

The principal scoffs, leaning back in his desk he looks at you with daggers in his eyes. 

“Well which is it? Was it something stupid, or do you not remember?”

“Both.” 

His gaze sharpens, and all around you, static raises in the air, the way it does before a lightning storm.

“There is a girl suffering.” 

“We didn’t do anything.”

“Imagine you go missing, imagine your mother-”

“We didn’t do anything!” you yell, the effort of it pushing you forward. “She left! She ran off and Billy left with me! We didn’t see her again! What the fuck is so hard to understand about that?!” 

The Principal glowers. 

“You watch your tone with me you little shit.”

“Alright,” Hopper stands, “Let’s all of us call down.” 

You lean back, rubbing your temples and take off your jacket to the t-shirt underneath. Hopper comes over, looking down at you, only he isn’t looking at your eyes, but lower. 

“What happened here?”

He points to a bruise you hadn’t noticed on your forearm. You examine the deep purple mark, in the shape of a hand, horrified. 

“I…I don’t know. It wasn’t there yesterday.” 

Hopper and the principal exchange a look. Hopper then sits on the arm of the chair next to yours. 

“Answer me one final question. If you’re honest, we’ll lay off you and Hargrove…” you don’t move, just stare at him trying to swallow your rage and nausea. “Are there times when he scares you? I mean at all?” 

Your heart clenches and you close your eyes for a long moment. When you open them you see Hopper’s expression hasn’t changed. In his mind, Billy’s guilty, and you hate him for believing that. You hate this town for being so certain he’s capable of evil. Not a person, but a tool to be placed upon a throat. You hate them for thinking Neil is some fine man because he pays his taxes and mows the lawn. You hate them for their inability to listen. Your gaze is cold as you lie. 

“Never.” you say “Not even a little.” 

He stares at you and you stare back, defiant and immobile. When he speaks again his voice is low, he gives you a steady look and your stomach twists. 

“And you’re prepared to go to prison for him?”

The back of your tongue goes soft and sour. You try to breathe, your eyes going fuzzy. 

“I’m…I…”

“Hey,” Hopper recognizes the look in your eye at last and gets up, searching for something to catch your puke in. Rather than wait, you rush from the office, the two of them calling after you as you run through the hall to the nearest bathroom, where you just make it inside before the puke starts coming. You spray a little on the floor and sink. Then finally burst into a stall and cover the seat of the toilet in foul beige and yellow chunks. Eggs and potato.

You’re shaking, your head pounding along with your racing heart. You retch so long and so hard that you’re gasping for air and coughing when you’re done. All this because of Hopper and that asshole principal. You can’t stand their judgement, as if they’d ever bother getting to know the kid they both blame. You sit on the floor (the part of it not soiled with your puke) and urge yourself to calm down. 

Yes, everything is a mess right now, but that would change. Surely someone would recognize the falsehood of these accusations. Maybe your houses would be searched, the woods behind your houses combed for little sheds or secret hideouts. But then, upon finding nothing, the theory would die and everyone would be forced to move on. Maybe Molly would decide to come home or her captures would slip up and she'd escape back here. Somehow, someway, everything would go back to normal.

But fuck, your stomach feels like it's clawing to escape. Is it food poisoning? You hadn’t eaten anything new. You retch again, throwing yourself against the toilet seat. 

Your fingers slip against the bile coating the seat, making you grimace, your stomach painfully clenching again and again. Your eyes are squeezed closed when you sit back. The bell rings, and lunch is over. God, will this day never end? You hear the squeak of the bathroom door, the sound of voices and feet in the halls flooding into the room for a moment. Then, squeals of disgust. 

“No fucking way.”

“Oh shit,” 

“Are you serious?”

Instantly, you’re flushed with shame. You force yourself up and lock the skinny door before they can follow the trail of sick to your stall. Shaking, you grab tissue and start wiping down the toilet seat, flushing to rinse the bowl, but this was the least of it. The girls discover the sink, and a new chorus of gagging and complaints fills the bathroom before they finally turn tail and escape the sour smell and ghastly sight.

You stop your fruitless cleaning with your hands on the seat, staring down into the clear water. You’re always surprised by the sudden intimacy with toilets one assumes while throwing up. In such a state, that smooth porcelain feels so much cleaner and safer than your own body. You hug it, and settle close to it, trusting it for shelter. For reprieve from the horrors taking place inside you. You’re grateful for its willingness to accept the mess you have to offer. 

There’s something in the dark sinkhole at the bottom of the basin. A glimmer, something moving. Something slick and nearly as pale as the toilet itself. You stare, your body so weak, yet it holds you there, watching the slow unfurling of what looks like a pale hand. Yes, five slender fingers open softly, like the petals of a sick flower. A pounding on the bathroom door sends you startling back from the toilet and you nearly slip on the vomit. 

“Anybody in there?” The janitor calls but you’re unable to answer. 

. . .

You’re back in the office, only now, you wait near the receptionist with your head in your hands for your mom to arrive and take you home. The principal has escalated things to calling in your mom, demanding he inform her of your involvement with Molly. Your head is swimming, your stomach fluttering and empty. You'd rather die than explain the way Billy and you had fought. His mild infidelity and the way you'd snuck out to confront him. 

You hear voices and the opening of the door and look up, your heart leaping to see Billy. Though, it sinks again when you notice his dad right behind him. You and Billy catch eyes and he tells you silently, not to speak. You’d never met Neil Hargrove and you’re certain he doesn't know your face. You turn your worried eyes back to your lap. You wanted nothing more than to talk to Billy, hear his voice, but you have no choice but to sit there as he and his father walk solemnly by and into the inner chamber of the Principal's office. 

You watch their feet through the short section of window not covered by a shade, and wonder what Neil will say. What he'll do when he learns what his son is being accused of. You can only assume the worst, and it makes your stomach turn, if it weren't already empty, you would throw up again. 

You sit, nerves jittering, until your mom arrives. By then the final bell has rung, yet Billy and his father haven't emerged from the office. When your mom comes in, her eyes flashing like bits of metal, you hang your head. The receptionist asks who she was, and then rescinds her question when she notices her eyes boring into you. You stand, as you know she’d want you to, and she leans into your ear. 

“Tell me why I’m here,” she says “Don’t make me hear it nowhere else.” 

You sink into yourself. 

“I’m…okay, but don’t be mad, okay?” 

“Girl,” she warns and you sigh, full of pain. You shift your weight, your stomach twisting. 

“I…Okay so, I’m dating somebody.” You let this sit for a moment. 

“What’s that got to do with why I’m here?” She urged. 

“Well people…basically-ya know that missing girl?”

Her eyes slid to the side, thinking. 

“That Kellerman girl?”

“Yeah, so people are making up rumors that Billy’s the one who took her, but he didn’t,I know he didn’t.” 

She appraises you. 

“How do you know?”

“‘Cause I know him.I really do, and I know he wouldn’t do something that crazy.”

“So why are people blaming him for it? If he’s so obviously innocent.” 

You avert your gaze, remembering the night with Stacy and the doubt you and Nancy felt about his involvement. Fresh guilt washes over you, then, for being no better than anyone else in this town, who sees a boy struggling with restlessness and anger, and strength he doesn’t know how to yield simply because he isn’t old enough to know. They see this boy, wound like a coiled snake, and fear the things he makes them feel. Just like you. Even while you cling to him. 

“They’re just small town people. They think anyone different is a problem.” 

You watch this resonate with her, certain she knows it more than she cares to elaborate. Just as you’re getting ready to defend Billy, say she’d like him and you’re certain he isn’t the problem, the door opens behind you and the principal leans out. 

“Ms. L/n, thank you for joining us.” 

You slink into the office behind your mother. Billy is slumped in his chair, his jaw clinched, his face red behind his hand, and you can’t take your eyes off him. Your love for him swells into a balloon many times the size of your chest. You wish, more than anything, to save him from this moment, this time and place. To return to your home in the curve of his neck. The pressure, you can tell, is crushing him, and it must be stopped. The principal starts to talk and you force yourself to look at him, close your lips, blink away your tears. Then, Neil is talking, cutting off whatever the Principal had begun with. 

“Ma’am,” he says, addressing your mom, “I just learned our youngsters started up a little so-called relationship a few months ago. Now, were you aware?”

You felt your mom’s gaze on the side of your fuzzy head. 

“My daughter still thinks I like surprises,” she says. 

“If neither of you knew your children were seeing each other,” Principal Drisk says, “With all due respect, how can you know they aren’t involved with Ms. Kellerman going missing?” 

“How can you know they are?” Your mom says, a spark of hope shooting up inside you. 

“Rumors, ma’am,” Neil says with a sour grin. “Rumors from school children is apparently all it takes.” 

“This girl is missing and your children were the last to see her.” 

“That’s not true,” you chime in and all eyes turn to you. “There were other people at the party, someone else had to see her leave.” 

“What party?” Your mom asks, striking you quiet. 

“Have you asked any of those other delinquints about this?” Neil asks. 

Billy glances at you, and his heart clenches. You’re sick, looking more tired and afraid than he’s ever seen you. He wants nothing else than to raise from his chair and gather you to his chest. He wants to make a peaceful home for you inside himself. If his father weren’t there, he would’ve told Hopper and Principal Mayes what absolute dipshits they were being. But, most shameful of all, he’s still afraid of his father. Afraid that the man would strike him right there in the office, and he wouldn’t be able to hit him back. For you to see him so weak would be too much. He feared something would break inside him as a result of that failure, never to be repaired. 

He glances over again and finds you looking at him. Your eyes, beautiful as ever, glimmer with a secret. A warmth, thick and satirated, fills the cavity of his chest, tightening his throat and a quick flash of fear pierces his belly as he realizes that he truly does love you. Even more now than he had a day ago when the thought of losing you turned his whole morning into panic. Now, he imagines a time far beyond this moment, when the world, as far as it matters, doesn’t exist, and the two of you are alone and free. Finally. The mental image is enough to make him forget his fear for a moment. All of the chaos of this impermenant place. You. You’re forever for him. You’re the great expanse of time and he can’t wait for his next moment alone with you. 

Less than a blink’s width of time has passed since you locked eyes, and now your mother calls your attention away to ask you why you were at the party in the first place. His stomach drops, remembering the heartbroken rampage he’d been on that night.

He’d spotted Molly with a group of friends, he didn’t know her well because she was a sophomore and he a senior, but something about her hair and lipstick stood out so he chose her and took her upstairs, all the while thinking of you. He was imagining you moving on and finding someone who could make you happy. He thought he’d be doing you a favor. Even if he didn’t actually fuck Molly, being seen going off with her would be as good as if he had. Word would get back to you and you’d call things off. 

You’d take your lovely heart elsewhere and he’d be free of worry. Your face is screwed up in discomfort and Billy sits up, his attention now fully focused on you and your sickness. 

“I was just there for a minute,” You say, “Just to check it out.” 

“And you found Molly and Billy together,” Hopper adds. You sigh, leaning back in your chair. 

“Oh yeah?” Neil sneers, nudging his son's shoulder “Real playboy, huh?” 

Billy knows better than to speak. 

“She left,” You continue, ignoring the rest. Billy knows you’re protecting him and God, it hurts. Don’t you know he’s meant to take the worst of the world? “We didn’t see her again, okay? Someone else must know something. We don’t.” 

The principal starts in again on the reason you were there, the fight with Nancy and your mom cuts him off. 

“Who else are you questioning?” She asks, met by an incredulous look from the principal. Hopper steps up. 

“We’re following all possible leads.”

“Sure you are,” she says. 

“We’ll need to search your homes.”

“Now wait a minute,” Neil says. 

“Do you have a warrant?” Your mom goes on.

“I’d like to know that," Neil says. 

“Ma’am, we’re just doing our jobs.” Hopper says. 

“Search warrants are part of your job, are they not? I’d like to see a judge agree that rumors from a bunch of bored children is cause to invade a home.” 

“Don't get me wrong, we’ve got nothing to hide,” Neil says “My son’s a fuckup, we can all agree on that, but I know what goes on under my roof.” 

Your head is spinning again, your stomach a cave, your eyes wander as the voices of the people in the room turn to cotton. Your gaze slides along the waxy panes of the window behind the principal’s head. Out under that blue cloudless sky, where spring is just beginning, there’s a girl, a column of white, and from her mouth, a dot of crimson. So red it seems like a tear of construction paper against her paleness.

You stare, then blink for a long beat, the world twirling in the dark behind your eyelids, like it does trying to sleep drunk, and when you open your eyes again she’s still there, only now she’s closer. She’s right up against the glass, her pale, bloody face staring right at you. It’s then that you recognize her. Molly. A pale, bloody-gummed Molly Kellerman. 

Your vision blurs, and then darkness. 

Banners by saradika-graphics

[snowviolettwhite]

Rules: Share a song, or several if you'd like, that relate either to Tarlos or a different 911 LS character(s).

Tagged by the lovely @heartstringsduet

Tk & Carlos/ Tarlos

Carlos saw Tk that first night and decided that boy is my soulmate and future husband. Tk later says that was why he ran way the first place. Tk knew Carlos was also his soulmate.

"Once upon a time

The planets and the fates and all the stars aligned

You and I ended up in the same room at the same time

And the touch of a hand lit the fuse

Of a chain reaction of countermoves

To assess the equation of you

Checkmate, I couldn't lose

What if I told you none of it was accidental?

And the first night that you saw me

Nothing was gonna stop me I laid the groundwork, and then just like clockwork

The dominoes cascaded in a line

What if I told you I'm a mastermind?

And now you're mine It was all by design

'Cause I'm a mastermind"

----

"So I told you none of it was accidental?

And the first night that you saw me

Nothing was gonna stop me I laid the groundwork, and then saw a wide smirk on your face,

you knew the entire time

You knew that I'm a mastermind

And now you're mine

Yeah, all you did was smile

'Cause I'm a mastermind"

------------------

Owen & Tk - Father/Son Love

Tk wants to be just like his dad when he grows up. Owen sometimes wishes Tk was not so much like him. He probably sent his parents into a panic when he told them he is going to be a firefighter.

I remember sayin', "I don't care either way Just as long as he or she is healthy, I'm okay" And then the doctor pointed to the corner of the screen And said, "Yo, see that thing right there? Well, you know what that means"

I started wonderin' who he was gonna be And I thought, "Heaven help us if he's anything like me" He'll probably climb a tree too tall and ride his bike too fast End up every summer wearin' somethin' in a cast He's gonna throw a ball and break some glass in a window down the street

He's gonna get in trouble, he's gonna get in fights I'm gonna lose my temper and some sleep It's safe to say that I'm gonna get my payback if he's anything like me

I can see him right now, knees all skinned up With a magnifying glass, tryin' to melt the Tonka truck Won't he be a sight with his football helmet on? Well, that'll be his first love 'til his first love comes along He'll get his heart broke by the time he's in his teens And heaven help him if he's anything like me

He'll probably stay out too late and drive his car too fast Get a speedin' ticket, he'll pay for mowin' grass He's gonna get caught skippin' class and be grounded for a week

He's gonna get in trouble, we're gonna get in fights I'm gonna lose my temper and some sleep It's safe to say that I'm gonna get my payback, if he's anything like me

He's gonna love me and hate me along the way The years are gonna fly by, I already dread the day

Driving through town just my boy and me With a happy meal in his booster seat Knowing that he couldn't have the toy 'Till his nuggets were gone

Green traffic light turned straight to red I hit my brakes and mumbled under my breath His fries went a flying and his orange drink covered his lap Well then my four year old said a four letter word That started with "s" and I was concerned So I said son now now where did you learn to talk like that

He said I've been watching you dad, ain't that cool I'm your buckaroo, I wanna be like you And eat all my food and grow as tall as you are We got cowboy boots and camo pants Yeah we're just alike, hey ain't we dad I wanna do everything you do So I've been watching you

--

Tagging But No Pressure : @anewkindofme. @im-overstimulated-and-im-sad. @the-flaming-nightmare. @aroeddiediaz @missmagooglie

@babygirl-diaz

@lochnesswriter

[blue-disco-lights]

* Masterpost * The Parent-Teacher Conference

A @galladrabbles series, updating weekly... Thank you for reading!

{on AO3}

-✏️-📓 -✏️-📓-

Mean & Scary “Daaaad you don’t understand!! He gives SO much homework. And he kept threatening to take everyone’s phones away today! We weren’t doing ANYthing!”

Ian knew middle school might get… dramatic. His daughter is walking him up to her math classroom for a parent/teacher conference with “the meanest, scariest teacher EVER”.

He turns to her as they approach the door: “He’s doing his job, cookie. Which is to make sure you’re learning. What’s his name anyway?”

She rolls her eyes ALL the way up to the ceiling. “Mr. Milko….”

He hears the door crack open, an incredulous voice utters…

“Ian?”

-✏️-📓-✏️-📓-

Karma

They both freeze in place, staring.

“Holy f…,”  they stutter out simultaneously.

Ian’s slow to recover, mind flooded with memories. Mickey.

“Dad?” His daughter’s voice brings him back to earth.

The boy he used to know transforms back into the adult in front of him. “You’re Sadie’s teacher.”

“Yep. Was pretty good at math back in the day, if you remember.” 

He’s propelled back again. Ratty couches, pizza bagels. Doodles on Converse. Mandy.

Ian smiles. “That’s crazy karma. You never went to school and now you teach here.” 

“Hilarious. We should start. Sadie, ready to talk geometry with your dad?” 

-✏️-📓-✏️-📓-

{{ The Song That Makes Me Think of You }}

Mickey welcomes Ian and Sadie into his classroom. 

Ian’s still reeling. It’s been at least 15 years since he’s seen his best friend’s brother. Biggest crush of his life.

“Start of the semester, like getting to know the parents. Thanks for coming,” says Mickey, looking as shell-shocked as Ian feels.

Ian takes in the room: neat rows of desks, textbooks on each, a poster that reads: “Come to the Math Side, We Have Pi.” 

His eyes roam back, collide with curious blue ones. He absentmindedly starts humming a familiar tune. 

“Dude, if that’s ‘Hot for Teacher’, I’m kicking you out.”

-✏️-📓-✏️-📓-

{{ Eins Sein by Wilhelmine song prompt }}

The gruff voice, piercing eyes, the way he walks - all of Ian’s intense teen crush memories flood back.  

Mickey’s classroom smells like wood and musty textbooks, and he’s transported to that ratty Milkovich couch. Back when Mickey had been his whole world. 

Flashback to hanging out with Mandy, reviewing English homework, counting the minutes until Mickey walks through the front door. He’d get lost in fantasies ~ of being close to him, touching him, running his hands through his hair… thinking Mickey makes everything in the world beautiful …

And how dejected he’d feel… convinced Mickey didn’t even know he existed.

-✏️-📓-✏️-📓-

Rain

Just like Ian, Mickey’s in a daze, memories flooding back. 

To standing across the street from the Gallagher house. Back then, he “needed to take that street, it was on his way, OK?” just about every day. His life back then was such an ugly mess.

Catching a glimpse of Ian, even briefly, walking to school or running around with his siblings felt like a balm.

And he remembers that day perfectly. 15 years ago. It was raining so hard. When Ian stormed out of that house, army backpack on.  

That was the last time he saw him. Until now.

-✏️-📓-✏️-📓-

"All that blood looks good on you. It really brings out your eyes."

“Mickey… this is a crazy coincidence, right??”  

“You’d be surprised how many kids we knew from the neighborhood are parents here,” Mickey walks to his desk. “Just met with Short Mike and his kid.”

“No way! Remember you two got into that fight in 6th grade? Total blood bath.” 

“Yeah, you and Mandy thought you were real funny too. ‘All that blood looks good on you, really brings out your eyes.’”

They both laugh, eyes locking in warmth and shared memory. “Sadie, your dad was a nightmare when we were your age.”

Sadie wishes she had popcorn for this conversation. 

-✏️-📓-✏️-📓-

Gamble

“OK enough skippin’ down memory lane. We’re here to talk about Sadie.” 

They sit at Mickey’s desk, watch him pull out a folder.

“I’m happy we’re meeting. Sadie’s doing great in class. Picks everything up super fast, perfect test scores so far,” Mickey turns to the girl and smiles.  

And he’s about knocked off his chair when he sees the look of pride in Ian’s eyes: “Honey, that’s awesome.”

“I’d gamble you’d do great in Honors Math next semester. Or math club, which I supervise every Friday.” 

Mickey feels a jolt as Ian beams the same proud look at him. 

-✏️-📓-✏️-📓-

Tease

“M-math club?” Sadie’s eyes grow wide.

“And don't worry about those assh.. uh, kids teasing you,” Mickey smiles warmly. “They don’t mess with anyone hangin’ out with mean & scary Milkovich.”

Ian wonders what happened to the shit-talking piece of Southside trash he used to know. Thinks he really likes this upgrade.

They review classwork until the bell rings… and it’s time to go.

Ian reluctantly gets up, feels panic wash over him. He’s just found Mickey again, now what?

They walk to the door, Mickey’s nervous eyes mirror his. 

“So… you know where to find me if you gotta problem?”

“Actually, don’t know where to find you… if Sadie has homework issues, or if I have … questions.” 

-✏️-📓-✏️-📓-

Flood

“Actually, don’t know where to find you… if Sadie has homework issues, or if I have … questions.” 

Mickey can’t believe the dorky teen he once knew is now this dorky adult standing in front of him.

Ian’s beaming this goofy, curious smile at him, and his body floods with a warm fizziness he hasn’t felt since he was 17. Not cool.

“OK, if you need me,” he scribbles on a post-it. “My school email. Sadie’s got it, you can contact me too. If you need me.” 

“I’ll try not to bug you with dumb questions.” 

“No such thing, Gallagher.”

-✏️-📓-✏️-📓-

Harness

It’s been five days since Ian reunited with his (still-gorgeous, still-devastating) unrequited teen crush.  

In the presence of his daughter, who’s been giving him curious looks ever since. 

“So were you friends with Mr. Milkovich when you were kids or something?” she asks over Fruit Loops one morning.

“Kind of. Actually best friends with his sister. It’s been a really long time...” He smiles and stares down into his cereal. 

Meanwhile, Mickey’s post-it has been burning a hole in Ian’s jacket pocket, an open invitation. 

For some reason, he can’t seem to harness the courage to do anything about it….

-✏️-📓-✏️-📓-

Grazed Knees

Mickey is NOT refreshing his inbox every 15 minutes.

He can’t stop thinking about how good Ian looked, not the gangly redhead hanging out at his house anymore. He was so damn chatty back then. But smart, and so funny.  

He couldn’t keep his eyes off him then… but there was no way in hell he could be obvious with it. It’d be lethal to even talk to him with his family around. It was easier to lie and be safe. 

He clicked “refresh” one more time. 

A new message, a jolt of adrenaline…

“Hey Mickey… have a math question….”

-✏️-📓-✏️-📓-

Koala Hug

Ian didn’t have a math question. Sadie was top of her class - she could teach him, frankly.

Ever since seeing Mickey again, he couldn’t stop thinking about him. The teen crush memories were strong, but so was the overwhelming attraction to the grown man. 

Grown man… like insanely-delicious cologne, take me to dinner, and then jump up and wrap your professional teacher pants around my waist and tackle me to the ground-kind of grown man.

Whoa. Get it together Gallagher. He’d start with a ‘let’s get to know each other as adults’-email. 

He pressed send and hoped for the best.

-✏️-📓-✏️-📓-

Pressure

Hey Mickey… have a math question. – Ian’s note reads. 

Actually, – it continues.  

it was an excuse to reach out 😊 Still can’t believe our paths crossed like that, didn’t think I’d see you again after high school, with Mandy moving away, my own shit going down… Anyway, you’re a math teacher! I’m so impressed. And so curious about how you got there. What’s it say in the teacher handbook about catching up with an old friend who happens to be a parent?

Mickey finishes reading and lets out the breath he’s been holding. A dull pressure creeps into his temples.

-✏️-📓-✏️-📓-

I'd rather have you, cursed or not

He did it, sent the email.  

They should all be happy now, right? His siblings, constantly badgering him to “get back out there!” and “Sadie’s growing up, it’s time for you to meet people and have fun!”

Didn’t they realize how cursed his love life was? One non-committal, controlling narcissist after another. Not one of them understood his complicated family dynamics, his mental health struggles, why he chose to adopt so young.

Something clicked into place though when he saw Mickey again. An understanding. 

Curse or no curse, it was time for him to choose himself and his own happiness.

-✏️-📓-✏️-📓-

Still Into You

“Ohmygod you’re still INTO him!”  

“What the fuck Mandy?? Was never into him.”

She’s laughing now. “How can one be so smart yet have no self-awareness.”

This was his own fault. Mandy demanded these weekly FaceTime catch-ups, but he should’ve stuck to updates about work and his cat. 

He obviously had to tell her he ran into Ian. But what he didn’t have to tell her was how tall he’d grown, how his hair was this lighter shade of red now, his voice had gotten deeper, and…. 

“You don’t know jack.”

“It’s not like he wasn’t into you too, dumbass.”

-✏️-📓-✏️-📓-

Zipper

Ian unzips his laptop case to check email and finish some work. 

~~ OK Gallagher. Checked the teacher handbook. Looks like we’re all clear to catch up.  

{Stomach flip} Mickey’d actually answered his dorky-as-hell email?! 

~~ You moved right? Used to seeing you every day… and then, you were gone. 

How’d I get into teaching? Short version - was a great way to get away from my asshole family. Only thing I thank my dad for is teaching me math in the “family business”. Maybe I can tell you the long version one day.

Ian thinks that sounds a lot like an invitation.

-✏️-📓-✏️-📓-

{{ "Revel in Your Time" song prompt }}

Maybe I can tell you the long version one day…  WTF. 

Had he just asked Ian out? Can’t believe he pressed ‘send’ on that embarrassing shit. Blames that 3rd cup of caffeine-fuel-sludge in the teacher’s breakroom, got his brain ping-ponging all over.

He feels ridiculous, inexperienced. He didn’t “date”.  He liked keeping things simple, transactional. That was safe, it worked fine. 

Now what? Ask him to the movies or something? Lay a blanket down, look for shooting stars??  

Who’d ever want to date him? 

He’s shutting this down now…

Who’s he kidding? He’d kill to be with someone like Ian.

-✏️-📓-✏️-📓-

{{“If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.”}}

After his last disastrous relationship, Ian decided that his next would be grounded in truth.

He’d white lied, appeased, hid, compromised himself enough.  

Yeah, I moved out 15 years ago actually. Complicated teen years, you know…  

If anyone knew, it’d be Mickey. The unstructured, unpredictable riot of their childhood. The weight of early responsibilities: caretaker, earner, not just another mouth to feed. How that can drive a family apart. 

The desire to then take control, build your own future. One rooted in honesty, autonomy, structure.

Wonders if that’s why Mickey loves math. 

I want to hear your story. Meet me?

-✏️-📓-✏️-📓-

End of the World

Meet him? 

Damn, now what.

He made up a whole list in his head of why this was stupid as hell...

First and fucking foremost, Ian was a parent in his class. This would get all twisted, the kid would be traumatized…

Those assholes in the teacher’s lunchroom would have a field day…

He’d been in love with the guy when they were kids - watch him tackle the guy at the door. Then what? 

Mandy’s voice interrupted his spiral: “Mickey you absolute FREAK, it’s not the end of the world, just meet him!

Fuck! Fine.

– Yeah Gallagher, Friday night, Alibi?

-✏️-📓-✏️-📓-

Perseverance

He arrived at the Alibi embarrassingly early and has been pacing around the corner ever since, willing himself to push through the doors and just go inside already.

He’d dropped Sadie off at a friend’s house for the afternoon and then come home to nitpick through his closet for the perfect casual, this-isn’t-a-big-deal outfit. Because it’s not a big deal.

Not like this was his first date (inside voice: it is with a guy like Mickey) 

You barely know him (but you have a good idea)

Maybe I should cancel (nah, you’ll get through it)

He pushed open the door.

-✏️-📓-✏️-📓-

Double Date

Guess he can’t back out now. After stress-smoking his third cigarette in the Alibi’s alley, Mickey snuck through the back door and situated himself in a dark booth. 

Kev materializes out of nowhere and places a pint down in front of him, V following close behind. 

“Mickey I need details! You’re meeting Ian Gallagher?? This a date or what?”

“You’re on a date? That’s hot, man.”

What possessed him to suggest the Alibi for this … meeting. He’s not telling these two a damn detail.

“Can you two fuck off, this ain’t a double date.” 

Just then the door opens.

-✏️-📓-✏️-📓-

Dream

He opens the door, lets his eyes adjust - he hasn’t been inside the Alibi … in a while. But he’s trying to shove all that nostalgia away so he can find who he’s looking for.

His eyes land on a familiar figure, slouched over a beer glass, takes a second to compose himself. That profile, the pensive stare down into his phone. Leg bouncing up and down in what he thinks might be a nervous fidget.

He still can’t believe this isn’t all a joke or a dream.

Just do it, Gallagher, he tells himself.

“Hey Mickey, this seat taken?”

-✏️-📓-✏️-📓-

Control

Mickey looks up to see Ian towering over him. He’s dressed more casually today than when he saw him in school, and he’s reminded how tall Ian is, how good looking. The view stuns him a bit. 

“No it’s not taken. Hey,” he says, trying hard to school his face.  

“This place hasn’t changed at all,” Ian smiles, looking around the room and waving at Kev and V at the bar.  

“Nope, same hole-in-the-wall as always. Wanna beer?”

“Sounds great, none of that craft bullshit.” Ian smiles at him and it takes all of Mickey’s self-control to not beam back.

-✏️-📓-✏️-📓-

Let Me

Somehow Mickey looks even better than Ian remembers. 

His eyes intently follow as Mickey heads to the bar to get their drinks. His fingers drum out a rhythm nervously against the old wooden table.  

By the time Mickey sets two Old Styles down, he’s run through multiple scenarios in his head about how this night might go. 

His favorite includes them flirting for hours, sharing a smoke, then boxing Mickey in against the brick wall outside, getting his hands down…. 

“You zonin’ out on me already Gallagher? Don’t let me interrupt.”

“Uh-no just thinking… I’m really happy we met up.”

[bidamonalbarn]

You're Losing Me lyric parallels

feel free to lmk any parallels/references i missed!!!

You say, "I don't understand, " and I say, "I know you don't" We thought a cure would come through in time, now, I fear it won't Remember lookin' at this room, we loved it 'cause of the light

A house not a home, all alone 'cause nobodies there (Dear Reader) / We could leave the Christmas lights up ‘til January (Lover) / In the cracks of light, I dreamed of you (evermore) / it’s morning now, it’s brighter now (Daylight) Now, I just sit in the dark and wonder if it's time

See you in the dark (So It Goes) / I search for your dark side (The Archer) / I’ve been sleeping so long in a 20-year dark night (Daylight) / I tapped on your window on your darkest night (Renegade)

Do I throw out everything we built or keep it? I'm getting tired even for a phoenix Always risin' from the ashes

I rose up from the dead, I do it all the time (Look What You Made Me Do) / You know how much I hate that everybody just expects me to bounce back, just like that (Labyrinth) Mendin' all her gashes You might just have dealt the final blow

Every mornin', I glared at you with storms in my eyes

Those eyes add insult to injury (exile) / Look in my eyes, they will tell you the truth (Lover Remix) How can you say that you love someone you can't tell is dyin'? I sent you signals and bit my nails down to the quick

You didn't even see the signs (exile) / Now I’m searching for signs in a haunted club (Death By A Thousand Cuts) / Gave me no compasses, gave me no signs (invisible string) My face was gray, but you wouldn't admit that we were sick

And the air is thick with loss and indecision

Clearing the air, I breathed in the smoke (The Archer) / I just wanna stay in that lavender haze (Lavender Haze) / Somewhere in the haze, got a sense I'd been betrayed (The Great War) I know my pain is such an imposition Now, you're runnin' down the hallway

Holding all this love out here in the hall (exile) / Were you standing in the hallway with a big cake, happy birthday (coney island) / You were standing hallow-eyed in the hallway (Maroon) / Chased me down through the hallway (The Very First Night) And you know what they all say

They whisper in the hallway, “She’s a bad bad girl” (Miss Americana and The Heartbreak Prince) / I know what they all say (End Game) / They say I did something bad (I Did Something Bad) / But 'cause he really knows me, which is more than they can say (Call It What You Want) / I know they said the end is near (mirrorball) / They said the end is coming (Sweet Nothing) You don't know what you got until it's gone

They say that if it’s right, you know (Hits Different)

Stop, you're losin' me Stop, you're losin' me Stop, you're losin' me

I’m yours to keep and I’m yours to lose (So It Goes) / But I stay when you’re lost (New Years Day) / I hope I never lose��you (Cornelia Street) / I don’t wanna lose this with you (Afterglow) / And I lost you (Maroon) / That was the night I nearly lost you, I really thought I lost you (The Great War) I can't find a pulse My heart won't start anymore For you

But I got your heart skippin’ (So It Goes) / King of my heart, body and soul (King Of My Heart) / He got my heartbeat skipping down 16th Avenue (I Think he Knows) / You have beaten my heart (hoax) 'Cause you're losin' me 'Cause you're losin' me Stop (stop) 'cause you're losin' me

My heart won't start anymore ('cause you're losin' me) My heart won't start anymore ('cause you're losin' me)

How long could we be a sad song 'Til we were too far gone to bring back to life?

My one and only, my lifeline (Dress) / He brought me back to life (High Infidelity) /  I rose up from the dead (Look What You Made Me Do) I gave you all my best me's, my endless empathy

You must like me for me (Delicate) / Even in my worst times, you could see the best of me (Dress) I promise that you’ll never find another like me (ME!) And all I did was bleed as I tried to be the bravest soldier Fighting in only your army Frontlines, don't you ignore me

My hand was the one you reached for all throughout the Great War (The Great War) / I vowed not to fight anymore (The Great War) / My winless fight (hoax) / Can’t remember what I used to fight for (evermore) / It’s a war, it’s the fiercest fight of my life and you started it (ivy) I'm the best thing at this party

I search the party of better bodies (You're On Your Own, Kid) (You're losin' me) And I wouldn't marry me either

I'd marry you with paper rings (Paper Rings) A pathological people pleaser

Bet I could still melt your world argumentative, antithetical dream girl (Hits Different) Who only wanted you to see her

I can change everything about me to fit in (mirrorball) / I'd pay if you'd just know me (High Infidelity) And I'm fadin', thinkin'

"Do something, babe, say something" (say something) "Lose something, babe, risk something" (you're losin' me) "Choose something, babe, I got nothing (got nothing) To believe

I’m still a believer, but I don’t know why (mirrorball) / Your faithless love’s the only hoax I believe in (hoax) / You once believed in me (Hits Different) Unless you're choosin' me"

And I chose you (Maroon)

[my-chaos-radio]

Release: November 6, 2006

Lyrics:

Come on, let's give it a try

Years on the run, boy I know I can take it

And now that I'm here I know you can't stand

The waiting, boy

Let's say no more games, no messin' with the mind

Always room for change, let's give it one more try

I got my bags packed baby and I'm ready to go

Look in my eyes rock steady and I'll promise you more

I got my heart back baby and it's skippin' a beat

I got my ass in check check and now I'm ready to be

What kind of girl wants to be a fool

If you're good to go I'm right here fot the takin' (ooh, take it, take it, take it)

Don't cross the line I'll promise you no fakin' boy (no, no, no, no)

It's all understood, no messin' with the rules (the rules, the rules)

If I let you go, boy I would be a fool

I got my bags packed baby and I'm ready to go

Look in my eyes rock steady and I'll promise you more

I got my heart back baby and it's skippin' a beat

I got my ass in check check and now I'm ready to be

Tell me why we act so stupid with games we're playing (ooooh)

Life is so cool when we're heading towards the same thing

You and I work best with love instead of the fighting (ooooh)

Let's get together forever boy, no more hiding

I got my bags packed baby and I'm ready to go

Look in my eyes rock steady and I'll promise you more

I got my heart back baby and it's skippin' a beat

I got my ass in check check and now I'm ready to be

Songwriter:

I got my bags packed baby and I'm ready to go

Look in my eyes rock steady and I'll promise you more

I got my heart back baby and it's skippin' a beat

I got my ass in check check and now I'm ready to be

Greg Kurstin / Gregory Kurstin / Shaznay Lewis

SongFacts:

👉📖

[anderbj]

Remember days of skippin' school Racin' cars and bein' cool With a six-pack and the radio We didn't need no place to go Remember at the prom that night You and me, we had a fight But the band, they played our favorite song And I held you in my arms so strong 🎶🎶🎶🎶🎶🎶🎙🎸

[lilyoffandoms]

After seeing @peonyblossom’s rec for a writer I haven’t read, I had to rectify that situation immediately! And I was NOT disappointed!! In fact, I was so beyond excited to find this fic that I’m gonna go so far as to make this the eighth writer I’m recommending to y’all this month 💕

I was so excited to click on the link and find this story over at ao3! You’ve no idea!!

First off, Ethan’s heart skippin a beat has me all awww!

"Nothing?" Tobias raises an eyebrow, "You want me to believe that?"

"Nothing?" Tobias raises an eyebrow, "You want me to believe that?"

"...No." Ethan shakes his head, "Not really."

haha this seems like something Tobias would say. Not ‘you expect me to believe that’ but a ‘do you want me to’. Gah it seem like such a small thing that one word makes all the difference. It’s so respectful! Like okay I’ll believe it if you want me to. Love this!

Not them having a place to go for private talks and moments!!!

“Look, Tobias, if you murdered someone and need to bury a body I won't turn you in but I am not getting involved." Ethan says, jokingly.

"What? No! Nothing like that." Tobias chuckles a bit, "Also, coward."

Ethan can't help but chuckle too, "I've dealt with you for almost two years already and I am not that attached to you to commit a felony."

"Boooooo." Tobias sighs lightheartedly, "Keep telling yourself that, but I know you're not above helping me bury a man."

This whole exchange lol is fuckin perfection!!! Plus that last bit, ‘…I know you’re not above helping me bury a man.’ The other connotations here are *chef’s kisses*

But this whole exchange that follows is so important to see in fiction!! Like it’s a scary terrifying thing to come out, even to friends. Coworkers and people that hold your freakin livelihood in theirs hands is even worse. The steps one needs to take to do that are… man (gender neutral) I don’t even wanna go back to thinking about that.

Ethan nods, "Alright. I guess...Tobias is Tobias."

But gah! this exchange just prior and this line in particular might as well have been me when this all went down with my partner. (Maybe a few more swear words lol but not directed at me just my partner trying to comprehend what that meant for us and settle into a new view of me and us. It’s a bad habit he picked up from me 😅).

Tobias smiles at that, "...And you're still Ethan."

But ugh! my little non-binary heart! This is beautiful!!

This reminds me of something a friend told me when we were going through a rough patch after my realization. The change is vocabulary for the other person takes some getting used to and it all comes down to ‘they are mine’, whether that be friend, partner, family, or something other. If you feel they are your’s in some meaningful way, that is all that matters and that is something worth fighting for and learning for and growing for.

To see this written out and this story told makes me so beyond happy!!

Okay now that I’ve had a trip down memory lane and taken y’all with me (sorry), I just gotta say that I loved this all! It was beautifully written and so in character and, my freakin gods, you handled this topic so well and so beautifully!!

Thank you for sharing it with us @jaredkau <3 <3 <3

[enjomo-arch]

𝗦𝗢𝗡𝗚𝗦  𝗧𝗛𝗔𝗧  𝗥𝗘𝗠𝗜𝗡𝗗  𝗬𝗢𝗨  𝗢𝗙  𝗬𝗢𝗨𝗥  𝗠𝗨𝗦𝗘  :

♠️  mean  ass  drunk  -  watsky  

Gotta say, i'll be skippin' what you got for the day  //  Maybe you'll be thinking that i'm hot in the head  //  Or I'm sick of picking on my chicken pox in the bed  //  You can think what you like  //  I think i'll take a hike  //  Has anybody told you you're a mean ass drunk? //

♠️  blood  //  water  -  grandson

Look me in my eyes  //  Tell me everything's not fine  //  Oh, the people ain't happy  //  And the river has run dry  //  We'll never get free Lamb to the slaughter  //  What you gon' do when there's blood in the water?

♠️  burn  it  to  the  ground  -  nickelback

We're screaming like demons  //  Swinging from the ceiling  //  I got a fist full of fifties  //  Tequila just hit me  //  Oh, we got no class, no taste  //  No shirt, and shit faced  //  We got it lined up, shot down  //  We're going till the world stops turning  //  While we burn it to the ground tonight

♠️  dancing  with  the  dead  -  one  hope

I'm dancing with the dead again  //  I don't think you'll forgive my sin  //  So I'll cross my heart and hope to live  //  'Cause I'm desperate for the touch of life  //  Fight these thoughts I'll never fly  //  I know I'm worth more than I try  //  I'm dancing again  //  Come dance with my friends

♠️  play  with  fire  -  sam  tinnesz

Rite of passage, classic havoc  //  Match in the gas tank, ooh, that's wretched  //  Unstoppable, legendary animal  //  Digital justice, now you're gonna know us  //  I've always liked to play with fire

♠️  you  know  what  they  do  to  guys  like  us  in  prison  -  MCR

In the middle of a gunfight  //  In the center of a restaurant  //  They say, "Come with your arms raised high"  //  Well, they're never gonna get me  //  Like a bullet through a flock of doves  //  Pain in my heart for your dying wish  //  I'll kiss your lips again

♠️  and  to  those  i  love  thanks  for  sticking  around  -  $B

Never really felt like I belonged  //  So I'll be on my way  //  And I won't be long  //  I'll be dead by dawn  //  What the fuck do I do, when sabotage is all I know?  //  Oh, I done dug myself my own grave in this hole, oh no, whoa, whoa

♠️  cannonball  -  8  graves

You're right, I'm good for nothing  //  I make the same mistakes a thousand times  //  Can't say you're wrong to judge me I burst into flames and run in blind  //  Wildfire, light it up and burn it all  //  Dead and I know it, set on exploding

tagged ; @feufist ♡ ♡ tagging ; you steal it !

[bullet-prooflove]

Donna’s Wednesday Radio Show Prompt List #4

Hey guys! As some of may know I do a weekly radioshow on Wednesdays and I thought why not put together a prompt list from some of the songs I’ve been playing. I thought it would bring some fresh prompts into our world!

Feel free to pop any of these prompts with a charcter I write for (You can find these on the pinned post on my blog) into my ASK box!

 1)     You've never been with anyone who doesn't take your shit

2)     fucked on the bathroom sink

3)     every girl in here wanna be her

4)      You know your smile woman

5)     there ain't nothing that I gotta prove

6)     Baby when you kiss my lips

7)     So am I wrong for thinking that we could be something for real?

8)     I'm so in love with you

9)     When you whisper in my ear

10)  I'm still the man you want It's just hard to tell you so

11)  That's the beauty of a secret You know you're supposed to keep it

12)  What I say is how I feel for you

13)   I need your loving every night

14)  Your tender words of love, 

15)  You are the loving girl who's taken my hand

16)  I know you've enjoyed all that attention from her

17)  I thought I knew about love I only knew about the fight

18)  For me there's no way out

19)  When I saw you walkin' in And my heart started skippin' a beat

20)  It's hard to change a love like this

21)  For a woman who became my wife

22)  To feel your lips upon my face

23)  How your hands felt in my hair

24)  It's just a rumor and I don't believe 'em

25)  I'll give you all I have

26)  Damn, you's a sexy bitch

27)   the moment you let go

28)  Try to love you when you really don't want me to

29)  I've been holding back my love

30)  I know you've never really taken responsibility

31)  You think your words will make me black and blue

32)  I'm always ready for a war again

33)  why do I try to love you?

34)  She's nothing like a girl you've ever seen before

35)  We wrote a story in the fog on the windows that night

36)  But you love me anyway

37)  All the better just to please you

38)  Deeper In love with you, I'm falling

39)  please him Any time or any place

40)  All I wanna be Is somebody to you

41)  So I lit a match and burned it down

42)  how you laughed when you said my name

43)  My kind of medicine is whiskey straight

44)  I'm gonna love you,

45)  My hands are dirty and my heart is cold

46)  you walk like you're a god, they can't believe I made you weak

47)  they don't make posters of my kind of life

48)  Gonna lose control tonight

49)  You try and change me, you can go to hell

50)  These days I can't seem to make this right

51)  What do you want from me?

52)  The boys I've been with say I got no soul

53)  Tell me who's gon' save me from myself When this life is all I know

54)  "You know, I haven't always been this way"

55)  And memories like a coat, so warm A cold wind can't get through

56)  just a bit ashamed

57)  nobody would ever compete

58)  how you gripped my hips so mean

59)  But I don't have to fucking tell them anything

60)  I used to be so tough never really gave enough

61)  I don’t feel safe

62)  Tell me who's gon' save me from this hell

63)  And everybody wants to know 'bout how it felt to hear you scream

64)  Whose gonna pray for me

65)  First date, first kiss

66)  I used to run around I didn't wanna settle down

67)  feeling of a lightning strike

68)  And she'll tease you, she'll unease you

69)  baby let's give it a shot 

70)  Her lips a sweet surprise

71)  Then you were gettin' down on your knee

72)  'Cause you say you love me and then you do it again

73)  Fooling my selfish heart

74)  And a love that, when it was right could always see me through

75)  Left broken empty in despair

76)  Going through the motions

77)  sacrificed for the greater good

78)  Kickstart the honeymoon

79)  The I do's and the kisses

80)  Let's set the date

81)  I fight the world, I fight you, I fight myself

82)  I'll spill this blood for you

83)  Without you, I'm all alone

84)  I'm tryna fight back tears, 

85)  You need a hero, look in the mirror, there go your hero

86)  Miss me when I'm gone

87)  Moments, when I knew I did what I thought I couldn't do

88)  I stood there, tryin' to find my nerve

89)  I think he recognized That look in my eyes

90)  But now, I wake each day Looking for a way that I can see your face

91)  Nothing ever mattered to me more than this

92)  So much more I have to say

93)  Watching me fall apart

94)   baby, I need more than that

[captainschaos]

hermit-a-day may 4: false!

*note, there is no 3, I'm skippin the wednesdays !

Queen of hearts heads and body parts, a very powerful fae to have as an ally, absolutely terrifying as an enemy <3

FALSESYMMETRY

court: summer

type: spriggan

-Falsie's a spriggan, one of the greatest natural fighters among the fae! Spriggans are built for fighting and are typically guardians of some sort or another, essentially the greatest bodyguards or just generally allies you could ask for. Do Not get on her bad side

-A summer fae, she's very intense even without necessarily being loud about it. It's said sometimes that when she looks at you it just kind of.... burns

-As summer fae, False also is bound by certain strict ways of the fae. She is one of the summer fae that is bound by the inability to lie, but don't you worry- she can be plenty slick, and her sheer confidence means she really doesn't need to flat out lie to get her way

[peterpanfromlemonland]

Don't Hyde From Me (ch. 8 Follow You To Virgie)

CW/TW: lots of fluff and angst. Lots of sad stuff here folks

Don't Hyde From Me Chapters

Tyler and Hoa snuggled up on the bed, their sleepy eyes finding it difficult to focus on each other as the warm blankets enveloped their bodies. The silence was welcoming as their day was eventful, their hearts beat in sync with one another. Tyler didn’t know if he should mention what he saw earlier, he was worried that if he did tell Hoa she would be mad at him and he would lose any shot at having a second chance, that he would lose her. As he lay there holding her in his arms he couldn’t help but let his thoughts run amuck in his head, he was losing control of his thoughts again.

Acting like we’d live forever.

“You know I can hear your thoughts, right?” The girl spoke, pulling him from his head, “You’re not gonna lose me, I promise.”

“How long have you been inside my head?” He questioned, startled by the sudden comment, “Have you been reading my mind all this time?”

“I don’t read your mind all the time dumbass,” she grumbled, “Only when I think you may hurt yourself or hurt others-”

“You sound like my old therapist-”

“You mean the one you-”

“Yeah, let’s not-”

“Sorry.” She muttered awkwardly, “Didn’t mean to sound harsh.” Hoa clung onto the boy tightly, as a tear threatened to fall from her face. Truth is, she knew about what he saw and she knew about how he felt. She didn’t want to push him away, this was as close to normalcy as she could get and she wasn’t going to throw it all out the window over a suspicion. The two were silent for a while, the boy found this form of silence too suffocating and he wanted to break the awkward ice that lay between them.

Gettin’ high and skippin’ class.

“You know,” Hoa started, “You can try to read my thoughts right now.” The boy stared at her, eyes wide, was she giving him permission to pry through her brain?

“You won’t be mad?” He tilted her chin up so she could meet his gaze, “You’re okay with me snooping around your head?”

“I gave you permission, didn’t I?” Tyler hesitated a bit before he focused all his energy on reading the girl’s thoughts, pecking her lips quickly before he closed his eyes in concentration. Ever since Hoa drained him he’d been having strange random thoughts, ones he didn’t know if they were his or not. That’s when it hit him like a freight train. A little girl, it seemed to be a young Hoa sitting on a swing set at the park. Tyler couldn’t help but smile as he watched the small child hop off the swings and jump around and about the playground, the little girl’s giggles were contagious. He followed the child, that’s when he saw her. Ha Bui. The woman was beautiful, Hoa was the splitting image of her. Like mother, like daughter. Ha called to the little girl in Vietnamese, Tyler tried his best to understand it; thinking maybe the mother was calling the girl over to get ready to go home.

“What do you see?” Hoa hummed as she stroked his hair.

“A little girl.” Tyler replied, his eyes still closed in fear he’d lose this vision, “You?” Hoa hummed in affirmation, a smile of success traced the boy’s face as he read her thoughts correctly. This was a memory, one of Hoa’s favorite memories to be exact. That day when the twins were around the ages of 4 or 5, they had gotten a letter from their father who was overseas fighting in some Middle Eastern country- he had attached a picture of him and a comrade trying to make sand castles in the desert, the children couldn’t help but laugh at the silliness of the photo. As the children and their mother were leaving the park they made their way to an ice cream parlor, little Hoa was practically bouncing in place with excitement.

I’d reckon we were heathens, but in her eyes we were saints.

Tyler opened his eyes slowly and pressed his lips against hers, amazed at how much she grew in over 16 years. He brushed her jet black bangs out of her face, her void like eyes burning a hole through his soul, he sighed with content. He wasn’t thinking, nor did he have full control over what he was saying- the boy was exhausted after all- but the words just slipped from his lips like a jewel thief escaping the authorities.

“I love you.” He whispered. Both of their tired eyes widened in sync, Hoa turning pink in the face as Tyler turned red as a tomato. He started apologizing profusely, the girl remained silent as a log; he could feel the tears in his eyes forming, this is it, he thought to himself, she’s going to run away for sure now.

“I…” the girl was at a loss for words, she loved him back but she was too scared. Too scared to say those words back to him, her throat was dry- she wanted to say it back, but the fear that he would be taken from her in an instant burned her. Tyler knew, he could hear her thoughts as loud as the cathedral bells, as clear as the sky. She didn’t have to say anything, but seeing her afraid of the future hurt him. If only situations were different, if only fate were in their favor. Tyler wiped the silent tears from her face as he pressed a kiss to her forehead, he had made his decision. He would stick with her through thick and thin, he would follow her to hell and back even if it meant losing his sanity. He would do it all for her.

“It’s okay,” he whispered through his tears, “You don’t have to say it back if you’re not ready yet.”

“I’m sorry.” She sniffled as she pressed her face against his chest, her shoulders shaking as she tried to muffle her sobs, “I’m just- I’m scared.” She was scared of what tomorrow would bring, of what would happen if word got out that she was in love with a serial killer- a monster. No, to her Tyler was no monster. He was a broken boy that went down the wrong path and encountered the wrong people.

And I will follow you to Virgie although it hurts me so.

To her, it was never his fault. Her fingers intertwined with his as she smiled up at him, this was something she wanted, she would fight with her whole being just to keep what was in front of her. Hoa pulled him closer and snuggled as her thumb brushed against his hand as she felt the sleep slowly pulling her in, as if she were about to black out after 6 drinks of Baileys- this time there was no regret, no shame, no guilt. She wasn’t running from anything, not when she had Tyler around.

To help you out when you get weary and you can’t go no more.

“Let’s get some sleep now,” she giggled softly, “I’m really sleepy.”

[dyrewrites]

Pale Blood - Bosch could use some assistance before his libido gets him killed

The wolves had long fled their mother’s lair, in a cacophony of snarls and growls and squelching flesh that would haunt Bosch until the day he died–which he hoped would not be soon. The witchvine had loosened, but not fallen away, shortly after the sounds died down but he was still captive, still starving and still unable to undo the growth he’d caused in his limbs–or force his will on the mad wolf holding him.

Fucking vines, he snapped, to no one but himself, straining to bite at the foul weeds stretching him too wide along the bed. How does she even have so many…

Then Lulu, in her human form, returned in a soft black gown that hid little from his eyes. And she brought with her a snack; a bloodbag she presented to him, as one might a priceless jewel, in the cleavage of her perfect breasts.

It was little wonder he didn’t argue as she laid beside him, or when she pressed in close enough for him to reach its straw. However, the expectant look on her face that sunk to disappointment as he drank and drank did cause him wonder–if only for a moment–between gasps at her wandering hands.

“You know, Lu, this’d be real hot if you weren’t tryin’ to poison me,” Bosch said around the straw held tight in his dry lips.

Lulusara petted the curly hairs on his chest and drawled, “Oh, Boschy dear…don’t you trust me?”

His eyebrows answered for him, as did the blood he choked on when he laughed, blood which splattered against Lulusara’s face. She narrowed her eyes and raked her nails through his skin, adding his own blood to what he’d spilled. Greater gasps took him then, and she bit back her rage to lick away the mess she’d made of him before taking care to lap up the sweeter blood he spilled on her–savoring its sparking touch as it seeped into her tongue.

“I’m sorry,” Bosch coughed, chuckling between sips of what he expected to be unique–after all, she did put on a show for it–but it was any other blood to him, sweet and electric but not especially so. “But you were jokin’, weren’t ya, that was a joke?”

She stuck her thick lips further out, trying far too hard to appear as innocent as Bosch knew she’d never been, and snuggled closer.

Bosch took a longer, slower sip before he spoke again, “Lu, all that noise I heard out there, with what I gotta assume were your pups. Then all the trouble you went to for these bags, you can’t tell me there weren’t a reason.”

Lulusara didn’t answer; she only pressed in tighter and nuzzled her face into his neck. Then her hot tongue teased Bosch’s ear, moist and soft against his skin, but his breath kept even, resolve strong. Until she replaced it with her teeth, not a gentle nibble as was expected but a hard and sudden bite. Bosch lost the straw, or part of the straw, as it joined the too-big drink of blood barreling down his throat.

“Fuck!” He choked, gagging until he could swallow.

Her giggle sang before she lapped at the holes she’d made in his ear, holding his other to keep him from pulling away, from retreating. Her free hand pressed harder against his chest, squished beneath the warmth of her breasts, to keep the bloodbag close–to keep him drinking.

“As much…fun as this is,” Bosch began, swallowing harder as the straw-tip caught, “I feel you’re skippin’ a few steps, answers namely.”

The blood on his ear drove Lulusara again to bite, softer, nibbling his warming, pinking flesh. Bosch’s breathing stuttered and the heart beneath Lulusara’s palm beat faster, she smiled and pulled the sweet lobe of his ear between her lips.

“Now hol’ up a minute there,” Bosch tried, fighting the gasp that built as Lulu’s hand left his chest in pursuit of more sensitive places and he wriggled to keep her from them. Her gown, thin as it was, brushed rough against his bare skin and he tried again, “The vines, Lu. You got me…at a disadvantage here. Not fair, that, to me or you.”

Lulusara purred in his ear, “Who says I’m fair?”

Bosch began to forget what he’d come to her for, what he intended before their romp…before whatever foul feast her and her wolves partook of. But he also began to worry for her eagerness, for the disappointment as he sipped the treat she’d brought. And then he gasped, his train of thought derailed by a seeking hand that’d found its target. What it went for was not hidden, not covered by the clothes it ought to have been. His wriggling failed to keep her from it, and it did not object to the attention.

“At least someone still likes me,” Lulusara cooed.

“Oh, I still like ya, Lu,” Bosch promised, moaning as her soft hand tightened and pulled, ever so gently. “Not the distraction, so much, at present…but I like you.”

Her nibbling teeth moved to his neck and the emptied bloodbag slipped from between her breasts as they slid across his chest. She kissed along neck and throat, following the lines of his veins down, her hand ever-moving, ever-busy, keeping his breaths shallow and quick.

Bosch’s worry grew, Somethin’s wrong, she ain’t ever this nice.

Then when Lulusara’s lips moved to his, when she shoved her tongue into his mouth and forced his into her teeth, Bosch saw just how he could escape.

His coat, untouched, laid on a chair an arm’s length away. He needed only to reach it. And, as Lulusara threw a leg over his hips, moving her hand to hike up her gown and ease her considerable bulk onto him, Bosch found that way. His wrists jerked with the motion, but the vines they hung in did not stab or tighten and, with his body still holding its extended form–for an hour or two more, until the suns were fully open, their hateful glare forcing them back–it wouldn’t be long before he could slip them.

Lulusara’s muffled moan shivered through Bosch as she guided him into her, and his joined as the full weight of her pressed against him, forcing him deeper. He bit the tongue that twirled so hungrily inside his mouth and Lulusara growled and slammed harder against him.

Hot and heady as she was–so warm and wet and welcoming–Bosch fought not to lose himself, not to fall too deeply int0 his lust, into her. He ignored the puffs of syrupy breath against face, the bite of nails digging into his shoulders, and focused instead on his coat–on escape.

She sleeps after, his thoughts plotted through their growing moans, just gotta enjoy the ride and then I can tie her up and fu–run. Right, yeah…run.

---

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@rmgrey-author

@ruinmegently

[ghostwise]

👾!

We were sun-burned and shoeless kids It was the dead of July We were skippin' stones in the failing light I smelled the fire place Although we were miles away We were infinite There was no time in those days

When all we knew wasn't stolen There was nothing real to lose When our heads were still simple We'd sleep beneath the moon You were something That would always be around When regrets were nowhere to be found

Here's another Tamlen song 🥺 This one very much describes he and Hamal's childhood in Clan Sabrae and has such a nostalgic feeling to it, and a sense of loss (we were infinite, you were something that would always be around... but we all know how that goes.)

This song is very sweet with them in mind, even includes little nods to Hamal's childhood selective mutism, and the relative safety they experienced for a time, together.

Dirt in our ears, sun in our eyes Shirts hung in rags, head in the clouds Our fears had no teeth, hearts were still blind You barely talked and I didn't mind

One major event that's part of my headcanon for Clan Sabrae involves a violent incident when these two were young. In a sense, their childhood ended then, when they realized the dangers of the world and experienced them firsthand. (This is the attack mentioned in fsisap, where Mathuin loses their ears and Hamal and Tamlen try to fight off bandits; as Mathuin says, everyone was left with scars after that, both physical and emotional).

Following that, Tamlen became very hypervigilant and angry, and felt a need to become like something of a protector of his friends and family. Hamal became very depressed and lost, and it definitely precipitated his later suicide attempt.

Night, down by the shore We were down by the shore When the skies opened up And all the stars fell into the lake When the water was warm Walked in over my head But you pulled me out by the collar of my shirt

[spacedem0n]

You got a bone to pick?

You've come so far, why now are you pulling on my dick?

I'd normally drowned your ass off

And all of the gods could watch

But I'm feeling nice

Here's some advice

Listen up beeyotch

I like

Lookin' smart

Kill the guys they can not

I like

Fighting hard

Maxing dad's favoritism child

I like

Skippin' Ares

Scarin' him,

Screwin' him

I like

Killer guys

Kickin' him in the nose

If you lack the balls

You can go play horse

Let your people fix you a snack (whoa)

Or you could come kill

Pound some blood and guts

With my owles, with the superiority complex (whoa, whoa, whoa)

Kiddo, what you waitin' for?

Welcome to my morder club

Time for you to prove you're not a loser

Anymore

And step into my smartass club

Nymphs fall

At your feet

Give you a blessing

Help you cheat

All you

Have to do

Say goodbye

To the good

Athena: He's still a threat, until he's dead. Finish it. Odysseus: No. Athena: ... Athena: Are we gonna have a problem?