#sk∞ x you

[pochiikou]

[wnbnny]

we can't be friends - l.mh

genre: idol!minho x reader, lovers to exes to lovers

tw: angst, hurt, breaking up, erasing of memories (almost) , mutual pining, did i mention angst, reader is kinda depressed, like two kisses ig

status: delivered !

word count: 4.0k

author's note: aaaa omd it's finally done >< reblogs + likes are appreciated!!

lee minho. your muse, your life, your heart.

he broke your heart one stormy sunday night and you hated him as you watched him leave with tears in both of your eyes.

granted, he did break your heart for your own good, to save you from the dangers of being with him. but you didn't care, not when he was your universe, your world. you would gladly take a bullet for him.

just as he would take a bullet for you.

minho knew leaving would break you, just as much as it would break him, but he needed to do it. life as an idol was already dangerous enough with all the death threats and saesangs, but the moment 'fans' caught even the slightest whiff of you they would hunt you down and hurt you, and minho simply couldn't let that happen. he knew you wouldn't care about all the danger as long as you were with him, but he did. minho would never forgive himself if something happened to you all because he had given in to his innermost wants and kept you by his side.

so he left.

november 8th, 2019, 8.46 pm.

"i want to break up." he said, one sunday night. the rain was pouring outside, flashes of thunder and lightning ringing through the sky occasionally. in the quiet and comfort of your shared apartment, with the dim glow of lamps illuminating your features, in that moment, for a split second, minho wanted to stay. he wanted to pretend everything was alright, to have you stay by his side and be happy together, but he knew he shouldn't. the two of you were eating dinner, sitting at the small round dining table in your kitchen tucking into your homemade kimchi stew. god, he would miss your kimchi stew, he thought miserably. 

"what?" your world felt like it had stopped, your hand frozen in place as you slowly tilted your head to look at your boyfriend sitting across from you.

"i... want to break up." he repeated robotically.

"minho, where is this coming from? did i do something wrong? please... just talk to me," you begged, panic starting to flood your mind as tears threatened to spill over. you couldn't believe what he had just said. the both of you had been perfectly fine before, the both of you were happy, why was he doing this? were you not good enough for him? did he fall in love with someone else? the thought alone made you weak.

"i just... it's for the best. i'm putting you in danger every day, fans will hurt you if they find out i'm with you. i can't let that happen."

"i don't care if they try to hurt me, minho. as long as i'm with you, it’s- " you reached for his hand, and could feel your heart finally sinking to the bottom as you saw his face, screwed into an expression of hurt and resignation as he shook his head.

"just... don't forget me in the future, okay?" before you could say anything, minho was already out of his seat, grabbing his coat and his phone, already reaching for the front door.

"wait! minho-" you jumped out of your seat in alarm and desperation, clinging to his arm as he looked back at you with a pained expression. 

"please- we can work this out, just don't leave me," you pleaded, tears already cascading down your face. you must've looked a pathetic mess in that moment, sniffling and sobbing, yet minho still thought you were the most beautiful person to ever exist as he memorised your face for one last time.

finally, minho turned around, cupping your face in his hands. your hands reached up to hold his, as he memorised your every detail for the last time. minho's lips found their way to your forehead, then the corner of your eyes, then your lips as he kissed you tenderly for the last time as you sobbed in his arms.  

"i'm sorry." he whispered, before pushing you back as you cried out and stumbled backwards, opening the door, walking out of the apartment and out of your life.

december 25th, 2019, 11.28 pm. 

your diary.

i still think of you, you know. i still see your face in the windows of that cafe shop we used to go to whenever i pass by. i know you're not in there, and i'm hallucinating. i can't go in there anymore, not without thinking of you. i can't even watch the television anymore without having to see your face. listened to your new comeback. that song was about me, wasn't it? 

it's christmas now. i adopted some presents for you. you would love them, the three cats. i named them soongie, doongie, and dori. quite fitting, they're playful like you. they'll never meet their father. i still wore your hoodie, the green one i always wore every christmas. you used to wear my red hoodie, but i guess you won't be here to wear it anymore. it still smells like you. 

i still wonder why you left. was such a pathetic excuse as me potentially being hurt the only reason why you would leave me? you knew i didn't care if i was hurt, so long as i was with you. you still left. i hate you for that, but deep down i could never hate you. i still love you.

january 7th, 2020, 2.35 pm.

you strolled down the busy streets of seoul, a long oversized fluffy coat resting on your shoulders and your nose pink from the cold. a sigh of relief escaped your lips when you finally stepped foot into the cozy ambience of a random cafe alongside the road, the warm air blowing gently at you helping to relieve the coldness settling into your bones. ordering a latte and a small cake which were promptly delivered to your table, you settled down to scroll through the news.

new technology developed, scientists say new machinery can effectively target and erase memories of specific people and objects. is now being offered at multiple mental health clinics nationwide at a low cost, guaranteed 90% success rate. for sign-ups and further information, please contact...

you raised your eyebrows at the news, marvelling slightly at how advanced technology seemed to be developing at this rate. thinking nothing of it, you simply continued scrolling.

january 7th, 2020, 12.02 pm.

you sighed as you flopped onto your bed, tired from a day of work and countless emails sent. feeling a warm, soft head poke it's way under your arm, you smiled softly, hand reaching out to scratch doongie's head as he meowed in content. smiling softly, you felt two large lumps jump onto your bed and settle on you, soongie choosing to settle on your feet and dori choosing to burrow his way under you arm as you giggled. 

"soongie, you're so heavy," you laughing light-heartedly as your oldest cat let out a 'meow' of indignation at your words. 

minho would love the cats so much...

your smile drooped, feeling that warm familiar sensation pricking at your eyes again. 

god, how stupid. it had been two months already and you were still hung up on him. everywhere you went, you saw his face, on advertisments at the bus stop, billboards in the shopping districts, to even advertisments on youtube, and every single time your old memories with minho would surface and you would miss him again.

memories...

oh. the news of the memory erasure experiment.

would it hurt to try? you tried imagining forgetting minho. for him to just be another face on the billboard, a random k-pop idol to you. to forget you had ever even loved him and forget that he ever loved you. the pain would be gone. your heart would no longer ache each day, you would no longer think of him and he would no longer cloud your mind.

picking up your phone, your finger hovered above the 'call' button.

"hello? this is the seoul medical psychiatry clinic speaking. how may i help you?"

"i..." you paused, gnawing at your bottom lip.

"i would like to make an appointment."

january 19th, 2020, 1.28 pm.

"welcome! do you have a booked appointment?" the receptionist greeted cheerfully as you stepped into the reception and seating area of the clinic, a large box full of items in your hands. the hallways were filled with posters and quotes, the beanbags and seats painted in warm and soothing colours. 

"yes, doctor kim at 1.35pm." you answered, watching as the receptionist typed a few words into her computer.

"ah yes, under the name yoon y/n, right?" she clicked her tongue, "for... memory erasure?" she glanced at you with a look full of sympathy, as if you were some lost wounded puppy. 

"yes." you confirmed, lips pursing together slightly as you stared down at the box.

"good, and you've got your box of items already. do double check to make sure they are linked to that specific person only, we wouldn't want any erasure of other memories woth different people."

you swallowed the lump in your throat.

"yeah, i have." 

"great, we'll be calling for you later, the doctor will run you through the procedure and then the operation will commence. take a seat first," she gestured to the seating area. not long after, you heard your name.

"yoon y/n?" 

you hurriedly stood up, making your way towards the nurse and following her into the operation room. the operation room was white and cold, lacking any warmth and colour, filled with odd looking machinery and lab coats and tools. you were sat down on a chair, and your box of items given to the nurse who began taking them out one by one while another nurse attached a few wires to your skin to a machine on the right which measured your heart rate, a steady thump-thump-thump. the first nurse began to place your items in a row, scanning each one under a machine.

beep.

minho's green hoodie.

beep.

the snow globe the both of you had bought together at a winter festival.

beep.

polariods of you and him.

beep.

a cat plushie you had gifted him in celebration of his lastest comeback before he had left.

beep.

matching mugs the two of you had bought.

minho. everything, everywhere, everyone reminded you of minho. it felt like you were drowning, consumed by him.

"alright, i'll be placing the device on your head. the device will take you through individual memories of the person, but you will have to re-experience certain bigger core memories again as those take a longer time to process. if at any point should you feel distressed or want to stop, please press the red button beside you, and should you want to restore your memories we will reload them back into your brain. however, if you choose not to restore the memories, we will automatically delete them after 30 days." the doctor explained, showing you a strange contraption with two pulse points connecting to either side of your temple.

beside you, the heart rate measured by the machine started beeping faster.

you nodded. 

the cold, tingly terminals of the device connected with either side of your temples, the unfamiliar feeling odd and alienating. 

then all turned black.

"min! look, they have matching mugs! we should get them," you pointed excitedly to two mugs at a stall in a summer fair you and minho had just happened to pass by. you watched as your old self pointed to the mugs happily, "the world's best boyfriend" and "the world's best girlfriend" written on each mug respectively. "that's so cheesy," minho said, a grin on his face as he pulled you close to him by your waist. well, the old minho in your memories. it felt like a punch in the gut yet the cure to your pain as you stared at his face again in your re-lived memory, his oh-so-familar grin plastered on his stupidly handsome face. "yeah, but it's cute!" you exclaimed, turning to face minho. "pleaseeee," you begged, lips downturned in a pout and your eyes shining hopefully as you tugged on his arm. "fine," minho groans, eventually giving in into your request, feigning annoyace by rolling his eyes yet still smiling at your delighted expression. 

god, you missed him so much.

the memory shifted, warping into another blurry picture.

this time, it was another memory that faded in, a memory of you and him sitting in the living room unwrapping your christmas presents. minho tore open his box eagerly, laughing as he held up a green hoodie from his favorite brand gifted to him by you, coupled with some other things like perfume and a brand new wallet. "oops... might've gifted you an accidental matching hoodie by accident," he smiled sheepishly, as you opened your present, some jewelry with . "a red hoodie! now we can match," you snickered, pulling the soft hoodie over your head and slipping it on. "hey, we look like the christmas colours!" you laughed, pouncing on him and tackling him down to make him wear his one as he whined in protest. eventually you did managed to get him to put it on and pose for some pictures, albeit him being disgruntled but still giving in to you anyways.

a tear trickled down your face, landing on your lap as your hands on the chair tightened, gripping the armrests so hard your knuckles started turning white.

the memory started to fade away.

"min! the new comeback was so good, i watched the music video just now," you exclaimed, bounding up to him the moment he opened the front door to your shared apartment. "thanks baby," he smiled, leaning in for a quick peck but suddenly finding a soft plushie being thrust into his hands. it was a plush of a brown and white striped cat, soft to the touch and extremely squishable. "what's this for?" he raised eyebrow, cocking his head in confusion as he stared at you. "it's to celebrate your comeback, I figured i'd give you something to cuddle when i'm not around you," you smiled, "i named the cat mr sprinkles." "who names a plush toy mr sprinkles?" minho laughs, watching as you huff at him about how the name was cute and he was being mean. "thank you though, i appreciate it," he kissed you softly, smiling at the small act of love.

no, stop-

you started to whimper and thrash around.

fade to black again.

"min, look," minho turned to you as you were admiring the ornaments at a booth, the both of you coming across a christmas market and deciding to explore it. "it's a snow globe of us," you pointed out to a small snow globe, with a man and women as figurines in the center of the snow globe and fake snow swirling in the water around them. "it does look like us, doesn't it?" he hummed, pressing a soft kiss into your hair as you subconsciously leaned into him. "we should get it," he suggested, smiling at how your eyes lit up and how you pressed a kiss to his cheek. the two of you purchased the item, and then bought some hot chocolate to sip on to relieve the cold setting into your bones. "jagi-ah," minho called, prompting you to look up at him before gasping in surprise. the first snow of the season. "you know, they say the person you witness the first snow with will be with you for a long, long time." minho grinned, leaning down to kiss you tenderly before intertwining your hands. 

you didn't want to forget him, you realized, as you gasped for air, heartbeat skyrocketing as you tried to open your mouth to scream. no, you would never want to forget minho. you would rather cling onto those memories and deal with the pain forever than never having remembered him.

the memory faded.

you gasped in surprise as you ripped open the box, holding up a brand-new, shiny polariod camera wrapped in a gift box, its paper shreds used to cushion the camera hapazardly strewn about the floor.  minho watched you with a small smile on his face, eyes sparkling as he happily obliged to any pose you wanted to do with him, groaning half-heartedly but still laughing at the silly faces you made.

the memory started to fade again.

"STOP!" your finger found the red button, desperately pressing it in an attempt to get the machine to start working. all of a sudden, you were jolted back into your consciousness in the middle of the white sterile room again, heaving and gasping for air as you tried to adjust back to the surroundings. 

"are you okay? do you need to stop the operation?" the nurse asked, a concerned look on her face. beside you, the machine was beeping, a erratic rhythm.

beep. beep. beep. beep.

your hand reached up to fiddle with your necklace, looking left and right. you swallowed, a lump in your throat.

"yes."

----------

you stumbled out the clinic, hands clutching onto the box of items tightly as your eyes adjusted to the bright light of the sun. 

hands shaking, you pulled out your phone.

'my love,' the contact at the top of the screen read. you hadn't called him in months, ever since he had broken up with you. you has tried for a few weeks, but day after day of missed calls was heartbreaking.

you pressed the button.

one ring.

two rings.

three rings.

four rings...

"hello?"

a voice you hadn't heard for months. a voice you had only been hearing in your dreams.

"minho-" a strangled sob left your lips.

"please." you could only force out a choked plea, tears falling rapidly, stumbling onto a nearby bench. people started at you as they walked by, a woman breaking down in a random street in seoul oddly disconcerting.

"where are you? i'll come get you." the moment you heard the concern laced in his voice, your eyes brimmed with more unshed tears, stifling a sob that threatened to escape. in the background, you could hear the sound of things being knocked over, presumably minho rushing to get to you.

you told him your location in between shaky breaths, occasional hiccups interrupting your sentence. 

"just wait for me, ok? don't move anywhere," minho firmly instructed, voice soft and calming.

a few minutes passed, and he was nowhere to be found.

he would hate you for this, you realized. you didn't deserve him. he tried so hard to keep you safe, and how did you repay him? by almost erasing all memories of him. the thought of it just broke your heart even more, for if he knew what you had tried to do he would never want to have anything to do with you again.

"y/n!" you heard a voice yell, whipping around only to see minho running to you at full speed.  you had never been more glad to see him, your knees instantly buckling as you collapsed into his arms, crying into the crook of his neck as you clutched onto him like a lifeline. 

you didn't think you would ever get used to this feeling, you thought. his touch, warmth, his gentle strokes of your hair and whispered sweet nothings were like music to your ears, his hand coming up to rest on your back and his other coming up to gently stroke your hair as he swayed you back and forth. he had clearly just ran from dance practice, you realized, slightly sweaty and panting ever so slightly. 

"what's wrong, jagi?" he murmured, soft brown eyes searching your own red and teary ones.

"i- i didn't want to remember you because it was too painful, and then i tried to erase my memories of you, but i realized i didn't want to and i really, really, really fucking miss you and it hurts-" your rambling was cut off by a hiccup, lips quivering as you stared back into his eyes.

here comes the part where he realizes your a disgusting bitch and hates you forever, you thought miserably.

"shh, it's ok," minho pulled you closer, engulfing you in his warmth as his hand rose up to cup your cheek.

what?

he was supposed to hate you, not do... this. you literally tried to erase all memories of him, he should be angry and offended, so why...?

nonetheless, you would take what you could get in what you assumed to be your last moments with him, so instead you leaned into his touch, memorising his every detail again. his soft brown eyes framed with delicate lashes, sharp nose and jawline, the pink rosy tint to his cheeks as the winter wind whipped around you.

"i'm sorry," you begged, "just don't hate me."

"i never did, silly." minho laughed softly, a wistful smile gracing his lips.

"but you left me." you said, confused.

"i left you because i loved you. it was just for your own safety, i didn't care about anything else," minho explained, brows furrowing slightly.

oh.

minho stumbled backwards as you crashed into him with a force, nearly knocking him over as you crashed your lips onto his, hands threading through his soft silky hair and teeth knocking against his. it was a heated, messy kiss, teeth clashing and tears streaming down your face, yet minho didn't seem to mind as he deepened the kiss with a fervour, all seeming to pour out of him, pain and regret, relief and want. it is only when you seperate with a gasping breath of air that you finally see his swollen, reddened lips.

“i’ll figure something out, i’ll talk to the company, make a statement or something- i won’t let anyone get to you, i promise,” he rambled, a giddy smile on his face. right now, minho could care less about the repercussions, even if he had to move mountains just to be by your side and keep you safe at the same time. 

you giggled, an infectious laugh bubbling out of you. the both of you, crying in the middle of a street, hands intertwined and both a mess, yet you had never been happier with the person you truly loved. 

“we'll be alright now.” you whispered. it wasn’t just a statement but a promise, one to keep forever.

december 25th, 2020, 1.43 pm.

“min! come look!” you squealed in delight, eyes lighting up when you were finally done. minho glanced over, and sure enough, you were up to mischief again, the three cats dressed in ugly christmas sweaters with cartoonish designs on them and matching hats on their heads. doongie let out a ‘meow’ of indignation, protesting as minho roared with laughter to scoop him and his fellow cats up. laughter bubbling out of your lips, you quickly grabbed your phone to take a picture of minho and the three cats, his face lighting up in amusement as he watched them try to squirm out of his grasp. 

“i love you, you know that?” minho says that night, the two of you cuddled up on the couch with the cats, watching your favourite seasonal christmas movies together and snacking on popcorn.

“i don’t say it enough, partly because i’m not good at expressing myself, but i love you. your smile and personality and everything. just thought you should know.” the tips of his ears are red as he mumbles, scratching the back of his neck sheepishly.

you smile, a red tint blossoming across your cheeks as you lean in to kiss him softly.

“i love you too min.” 

how did you ever get so lucky? you think, leaning in to rest your head on minho’s shoulder as you resumed watching the movie, one hand absentmindedly scratching dori’s head as he purrs in contentment. here, in the dim light of the cozy apartment with minho, love heavy in the air around you two and christmas lights twinkling merrily, you think you have everything you have ever wanted in life.

after all, it didn't really matter where you were, as long as minho was by your side.

taglist: @starseungs @missmajdastark @jazziwritesthings @layviyu @lailac13 @ana-marais98 @foxinthewild @dandelions-143 @rylea08 @linocz @minseongsworld @realrintaro @kkamismon12 @felinows @baribaaari

[tamagoneko]

first meeting! 💙🩷

im so sorry for this big ass post jlfda but fuck it we ball

[youreyeson1y]

when no one is around, you'll find me on my tallest tiptoes (shining just for you)

pairing: bang chan x reader (you/your)

title: mirrorball by taylor swift (album: folklore)

cw: swearing, mental health (reader is emotionally drained)

synopsis: sometimes someone just needs to show up for you to realise that maybe even the end of the world doesn't sound so bad if they're with you. or, where chan sends you a text that makes you break down.

tags: comforttt, chan being the absolute sweetheart that he is, reader is the silent type who doesn't prefer talking about their struggles, unedited, lowercase intended, relationship is not defined so can imagine it however y'all want 🤍

author's note: this was heavily self indulgent because sometimes you just need the reassurance that it'll be fine. so to anyone that needs to hear it, whatever you're struggling with now, you'll just look back on it in the long run and be proud of yourself. i love you, and my dms are always open if you wanna talk <3

word count: 0.9k

enjoy !

"did you eat today?"

it was just a text. just a single text.

but you were surprised to see teardrops on your phone screen as you stared at those words for a solid ten minutes.

it was nothing out of the ordinary; chan was always checking up on you, making sure you were hydrated, got home safe, or anything and everything else.

but sitting in the hallway in front of your apartment door, with messy hair and crumpled up pieces of papers in your bag and your glasses resting on the top of your head, covered with dirty fingerprints... you felt pathetic.

chan was the one managing a world famous band, he was the one constantly producing songs or brainstorming ideas or working on their demanding choreography.

as you absent-mindedly scrolled up your chat, it was him who was constantly checking up on you and asking you the simplest things that held the deepest meaning.

and what were you doing?

letting some mundane crisis wear you out and come back to being the person you had tried so hard to escape.

the silent vibration of your phone made you wipe your tears with a shaky breath, and accept the call request with a smile on your face.

"hey man, how was practice toda—"

"i'm coming over with your favourite take-out, and you're gonna shut the fuck up for once and let me treat you."

"chan..." inhale. exhale. you could not allow yourself to cry in front of him.

he already had a lot on his plate with the comeback, he didn't need you to add on to that and ma—

"and if you need to, we can talk about your day, and i can tell you about mine, and we can laugh about the stupid things me and the boys did or how steve has been pissing you off these days,  or we can just not say anything and eat and go to bed. how's that sound, love?"

what did you ever do to deserve this man?

"where are you, chan? i miss you."

the elevator dings, making you look up and exhale, your whole body instantly relaxing at the sight of him.

"i'm right where you need me to be." he smiles, his dimples and tiny nose scrunch making your insides ache.

"i'm sorry," you almost felt bad because of how good it felt, having someone you care about meet you halfway. being taken care of. "you're probably so tired after practice, you really didn't have to..."

you didn't want to be a burden, but looking at the way his gaze softened and his shoulders relax as you meet his eyes, you realise...

maybe you could help carry each other's burden; together.

chan placed his bag on the ground and crouched down on the floor beside you, mirroring your position.

he saw your tear streaked face, and you remember telling him once how cringey you found it when male leads would enter like knights in shining armour and save the helpless maidens.

you wish you hadn't, because you really needed the saving right now.

chan smiled.

"you know," he started, taking your glasses from your head and wiping them on his shirt. "i had a pretty shitty day today. i mean, it wasn't that bad, but i feel like i could've done much better, that i couldn't give my best. and maybe we couldn't finish recording today because of my mistakes. but the weird thing is, i realised that i wanted to say that to you. and you know how much i hate letting people know that i messed up." he chuckled.

he gently puts the glasses on your face, making you look at him.

"i wanted to let you know that i didn't do well today because i knew you would not just cheer me up, but tell me to do better next time.

i sent you that text purely out of selfish motives, so that i could get a chance to talk to you. so honestly, you don't have to feel bad."

you hadn't even spoken a word since he'd arrived, but it felt like he understood you better than you could've ever put it into words.

"plus, i was craving some chinese anyway." he stood up, reaching out his hand to you. "so, are you gonna make me wait outside the whole night, or are we gonna get in?"

"chan," you felt... love. adoration. gratitude. he did have a way of making you feel things you didn't know you could feel anymore. "did you get those complimentary starters they give? i will simply not let you in if you haven't."

as you saw him finally flash his biggest smile at you, you knew you would be okay.

"who do you take me for? of course i did! and i was going to wait till desert but they may have given me a little somethin-somethin on the house as they were closing up their shop."

it didn't matter what you both talked about as you sat down to have cold take out food; why you felt like punching steve or how chan was having the time of his life trolling stays on his lives.

at the end of the day, what mattered was you knew he was there, someone to listen to you talk for hours and hours and someone he could fall asleep in the arms of, forgetting for a moment that he had the weight of the world on his shoulders.

and thats how you know it would all be okay.

because even if it felt like the end of the world, there was someone willing to spend it with you.

a/n: comments and reblogs are what keeps me going so they are highly appreciated, thank you !

if you're going through something similar, please feel free to reach out to anyone, remember, there are people out there who love you more than you may realise.

untill next time 💌

bang chan masterlist

[ladybyakuya]

| SWOON + NATSUKI SEBA .

+cw.—f!reader, canon-typical elements and themes, borderline yan themes, explic!t smūt, s/d dynamics + s/m themes, voice k!nk, strength k!nk, edging, use of sex toy ( vibrator ), orgasm denial,dubcon, begging, sub!space + sub!drop, praising, dacryphillia, aftercare

+wc.—2.6k

+syn.—Natsuki wanted to do something for you but that did not include hurting you; then, why are you crying ?

+notes. —This has been in my drafts for a few months when i made my debut post to the fandom but it's finally out. ngl the borderline yan behavior was a little hard for me to write given his character profile but i couldn't get that particular scene from my head. you'll see which scene I'm talking about when you get there and if you ended up spotting it please yell in tags / comments.this is also cross posted to ao3 & biker!gaku is my next post tho. | redirect to blog navigation.

Your relationship with Natsuki is ambiguous at best. You are an assassin. He is a weapon engineer. That is how things started between you two. You still remember the first time he asked you to volunteer for a test run for a particular weapon he made all by himself. He was so nonchalant as well as so tactless that it made you dismiss it. But you caved in eventually because he constantly kept nagging. He had the privilege to do so since you practically lived under the same roof as him, and ran into each other so many times throughout the whole day, making it impossible for you to avoid him.

“This is not going to be a habit,” you mentioned when you first volunteered and he just nodded. You swear you saw him laugh when he turned while nodding or could it be your imagination? 

Somehow this thin layer between being a test subject for his newly invented devices and batchmate diluted to the point that now he is testing you, your patience, and your sanity without using any of his newfound devices. You can not pinpoint when it all started, the dilution of such a boundary. A boundary that you dared not to cross with him. A boundary that you drew with the sole purpose of ceasing all sorts of expansion of his relationship with you. It was for him: to keep him out, not for you, and it failed to keep you safe yet it managed to shock you  whereas the mere existence of such a boundary tempted Natsuki enough to explore it, blur it, erase it, little by little until there was no trace of it.

Now, you are sitting on his lap legs sprawled apart to be as close to him as you can afford. He has both of your arms held under a tight grip keeping them at the valley of your waist. 

“Comfortable?” he asks, his lips grazing underneath your ear over your cheek ever so slightly as he inclines to check his grip on you. You give him a hum as a response. With his free hand, he pushes a hard bulb inside your pussy. You know what it is, a pleasuring toy, a vibrator but with your knowledge you considered it quite small. 

Seba-san said he wanted to surprise you with something. You have been so good to him, so helpful with his work, and needless to say so patient with him that he wants to do something for you; something that will make you content and happy, maybe wanting more of his surprises and thereby be dedicated to continue working with him on a pro-bono basis. 

What could be more rewarding for you than making you cum? That too for the first time? He heard you once. Talking about it to Shin, saying how you always had to take care of yourself. How nobody bothered enough to make you cum! Always busy with just getting themselves off first. Natsuki practically felt his body shiver. You have never orgasmed before? That's hard to believe. How could such no one make you cum with a face like that? So pretty, so expressive. Moreover, he knows— he is aware of it that he can achieve this feat, oh dear the range of pleasure he could provide you— makes it hard for him to think it through.

Natsuki turns on the vibrator and the intensity has already swept away all your attention from the surroundings channeling it all onto him. “Is that the highest bar?” One of his eyebrows stretches upwards. So, you want more. . .? Is this too little for you, dear? Natsuki does not give you an answer but increases the intensity just one more bar making your lips curl inwards. You tip your head down, let your eyelids fall and your vision goes dark for a second. The sound of vibration reaches your ear. He increases one more bar and it just threatens you to hold on to something, anything. 

Looking up you let out a wry awkward chuckle followed by a heavy gasp you ask, “Are there more?” Natsuki’s eyebrows pinch a little and then go back to normal.

“Yes.” His voice is low, raspy, and impatient. You try to loosen his grip but he is strong. You feel his grip on your wrist tightens further. “Three more buttons.” By now your legs have encapsulated his torso yet the urge to move your hips against his lower half does not go away. You do not want this sensation to stop either, just a little toned down but saying that might not give you the result you want.

Natsuki is not doing any better though. The choice of your clothing is bothering him, hindering him from studying you properly. He should have thought of that, perhaps buying you an outfit that would not expose your excited state too ludicrously. Honestly, he is holding back the urge to put his mouth on one of your nipples and suckle on it over the cloth. He can see it properly, your buttoned nipples. Do they match the color of your lips? 

You have started to whimper, just a little though like a wounded cat but that is not the sound he wanted to hear. He increases the intensity by another progression and your forehead rests on his shoulder sniveling. You are in desperate need of distraction. You just can not let him see you like this, crumble like a house of cards. You refuse to give him a glimpse of such an intimate moment. Not to mention it will be your first time too.

“You are so impressive.” Natsuki opined, placing a chaste kiss on your cheek. “I would not have lasted this long.” He lies. He lies because he knows he will win if you two make a bet to see who lasts longer. Maybe Natsuki should save it for the next session. Turning your head, you glance at him, gasping with your mouth open as he intently watches your eyes glisten with water. “Just one more left. You can do this. I think—he pauses to glance at your lips for a second. “I believe you really can if you try,” he soaks his lips by running the tip of his tongue in a quick swipe.

It's obviously tempting. You lean for a kiss but he sways his upper body away. Ah! The hurt in your eyes. The shock. The frustration. The anger. This is what he wanted to witness: the downfall of your tranquil demeanor that you always carry with you in each step. He increases the intensity to the fullest making you close your eyes. The way you are whimpering and breathing could easily be mistaken as the sound of a dying creature. His is hard but that does not bother him as much if he can see the tears rolling down your cheeks as you arch your body. There are beads of perspiration over your forehead, and chest a little bit on your face and hands.

“Stop.” you welp. “Make it stop.” Natsuki keeps the remote aside on the table, running the tip of his index finger over his bottom lip rashly.

“Why do you want to stop? You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?” He brushes his fingers against your cunt over the cloth making you jump releasing a hiss of pleasure. “Look. You are so wet.” Even after touching you through the cloth, his fingers are so sticky. He stretches his fingers revealing the strings of your arousal and glances at you. You can barely hold back your tears. You can not figure out if those are tears of pleasure or the embarrassment seeping into you as he licks his slick fingers staring right into your eyes.

“Then, at least leave my hands.” You say huffing it out with a pained sob then, start to cry making him go silent for a few seconds. He probably forgets to breathe until your whimpers start to get elongated, louder and finally turn into lewd cries of pleasure. This is a pleasure, yeah! It definitely is. He does not know what pleasure would look like on your face. So, he assumes it; even fantasizes about it a couple of times.

“No, that I can’t do.” He whispers but a mumble reaches to your ears. “But I can do this,” He states, taking his free hand behind you and interlacing his fingers with yours. It relaxes your strained muscles. He still kept his grip tightened while filling the gaps of your fingers with his not giving you even a bleak chance to free your hand. 

Now his face is closer to yours but you know better than to pursue the desire of putting your lips on his. He rests his chin just at the advent of your cleavage on your chest watching you as you start to twist and turn your body, buck your hips. Your feet stretch out as farther it can as the wave finally stops hitting the shore. The way you inhaled through your mouth and then exhaled it felt like you were about to puke. Natsuki was the first to question, “What just happened? I didn't…

“Why did you stop?” 

“I didn’t.”  Is he lying? Is this fun to him? Tormenting you to the point of ruin. Natsuki can see your lips droop like the wilting petals of a flower, eyebrows growing closer to each other. You roll your bottom lip inside your mouth unable to take it anymore, feeling a wave of sorrow building inside your ribs. But you do not feel Natsuki’s hand anymore. So, without wasting any further seconds to got out of his clutches and ran towards the bathroom. Natsuki follows without thinking anything only to be met with the chocolate of the wood. 

As soon as you bolt the door of the bathroom it all comes crashing down— flashes of his face when he was touching you, looking too fondly than he should, pushing your limits, and making you cum. You could not help but feel the guilt of it all since it was truly your fault all along. You could have said no and he would have listened. He is not that cruel. No. Never that cruel to you but you gave in because you were curious too. You were eager to know how it would feel to orgasm, to be touched so fondly and full of desire. And, you saw that desire in his eyes: that greedy lustful desire but you were wrong to think that you could contain it all in. Now it is oozing out of you, out of him. This realization that came so suddenly and so strongly which has been dormant for years, perhaps when you started frequenting his room often after being his mock-up weapon tester lets another wave of misery wash over you. Does he like you back the way you like him?

“I’m sorry.” You hear Natsuki’s voice. It is faded but you hear it, his breathing too. “I’m sorry.” Then again, “I’m sorry. . .I’m sorry. I— I will never do this again.”

“You don’t know that.”  You shout from the inside of the bathroom, your voice hitting the walls howls back at you, and then you gasp before finally breaking into a sob. It hurts. It pains. It aches. It agonizes you to think of anything or even touch yourself to release that piled up pressure in you. You feel as if there was no spark fiery enough to create wildfire in your body. All those hook-ups and bad dates that ended up with you being used as a thing to get off . . . they are all coming back to you now . . .maybe it's you. . .maybe it's you who can’t cum and that is why they did what they craved: took care of themselves with your help.

Natsuki can hear you; your faint sob coming through the locked thick wooden door as he stands leaning his head on it. He knows saying sorry no matter how many times would be useless now but he still wanted to say it because it was never his intention to hurt you like this. He just wanted to see your pleasure and push you to the high end of your limits, show you something so strong, so impactful that every time you would touch yourself you would think of him, so every time you ever think of going out with another guy you would think of him. As Natsuki’s head rests on the wooden door he draws lazy patterns on the doors while waiting for you to come out. 

It has been over half an hour. Natsuki does not mind standing even though you have not replied. But one thing has changed you have stopped crying. He can not hear your sobs anymore. He finally sits on the ground hearing something from the other side, his face still facing the door. He is waiting for you to come out, and see your face.

“Natsu, are you still there?” Your voice is murky. It wobbles as you speak more.

“Yes. yes. Of course. Am still here. Still here.” Natuski hears the lock of the door open with a click but you wait before pulling the door inside the bathroom to open it. You see Natsuki flopped on the floor, legs one of the other loosely placed with his headphones still as it was.

“Congrats. You broke the vibrator.” That was the first thing he could say when he saw you, your red swollen eyes. You are drenched from head to toe, water dripping on the floor as Natuski is forced to remember certain days when you would come home like this. Is this your coping mechanism?

“What?”

“Well. It was my fault too . . .” his eyes pull away from you as he confesses. He can’t think of anything other than being near you. He does not want you to watch you fall apart. If you do, he will be there to pick up the pieces and build Rome again. He knows it’ll be different Rome, he knows that but still worth a try. “Shall we go eat something? You must be hungry.” 

“Nah!” you walk past him, fully drenched looking for a towel. You appreciate his sentiment, you really do but right now you do not want those pair of eyes to look at you. Natsuki gets up and walks up to you holding you by your upper arm and jerking you towards himself. You do not protest much. You are tough. You can handle it when he is rough with you but lust and desire are oozing out of you. It’s hard to just watch and not do anything about it, about the spill. 

Natsuki cups one of your breasts and you cling to his touch like a branch of a tree reaching out for sunlight. He wets his bottom lip before pressing his thumb over your nipple. It does not take for him to wipe the boundary off that you had put up to keep him away. His lips on yours cascading like waterfall from a mountain,hand tending to your breast while your hands find a way to clamp around his shoulders pulling him into the kiss, dampening his clothes more and more till he squeezes your breasts a little too hard making you come back to reality, pushing him away to breath again. Your shoulders are against his chest now. His grip over your upper arm is still intact. He won’t let you go. He won’t let you go. He won’t.

“If you don’t take care of yourself then I'll be forced to do so.”  Your eyes are so sharp as you swat your head to look at him. 

“Yes.” You murmur and glance at his lips. “Yes. Yes. ‘course.” You lean towards him a little saying, “I’m hungry, very much hungry.” as your lips clash against his again.

[astraystayyh]

Echoes of love- complete

"to love someone is firstly to confess : i am prepared to be devastated by you." Billy-Ray Belcourt.

genre : memory loss trope. angst and i mean lots of it. slow burn. basically unrequited love except you were in a loving relationship and everything changes overnight.

pairing : minho x reader.

summary : if given the choice to, would you love minho again? yes, you would've once said in a heartbeat. but now, you aren't sure of your response anymore.

general warnings : depiction of a car accident. physical wounds. mention of blood. themes of alcohol addiction. depictions of anxiety and depression. depictions of nightmares. reader has she/her pronouns.

Chapters :

i. to forget.

ii. to remember.

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

quotes series masterlist

a.n : excited about this fic as it was very, very and i mean VERY challenging to write, but also rewarding to reread in the end! i hope you'd enjoy reading it as well <33 the taglist for the quotes series is open!

[celestial-letters]

HEY CHAT. the silly (it was mammon. we all knew it was going to be mammon) won the poll so i am now legally obligated to write smth for our first man. hope u guys like it 🫶 also. i dont. have. yellow on mobile. so we have to. deal with it. and. use orange instead. #sad

mammon relationship hcs

OH THIS FUCKING GUY.

Loser.

Will do stupid shit to impress you.

"Hey, watch me carry this comically large box!"

"Mammon, I don't think that's a good idea."

"Don't be ridiculous! Look!" *dies*

You mention it's kind of cold? He will immediately take off his jacket and have you wear it. His brothers will not hear the end of it.

"Hey, guys! Guess who wore my jacket? That's right, it was-"

"Mammon, nobody cares."

After a lecture from Lucifer, Mammon will look for you in search of comfort (and cuddles)

He'll bury his face in your shoulder and complain while you rub circles on his back

He loves affection, but he gets embarrassed easily

Super clingy once he's comfortable in your relationship, but don't be fooled, he gets flustered all the time.

He's amazing at giving gifts. He knows exactly what you want without fail. Mammon just knows you best.

He's also surprisingly good at knowing where you are??? Like, Lucifer will ask him where you are and he'll respond with "I dunno, try the cat cafè." And you're there??? You didn't even tell him where you were going, he just guessed.

So annoying about you. He won't shut up about you, but he can't help himself!! He just loves you so much and everything about you is so perfect that the list would be over 30 pages long! Don't tell him I said that-

He may not be the Avatar of Envy, but he tends to get jealous easy.

You're hanging out with his brothers a little too much for his liking? That's it, you're legally obligated to spend the day with him now.

Physically cannot be more than 30 feet away from you or else he will implode.

So, so many movie marathons. At least once a week.

He tends to fall asleep easily though, so they usually never get finished.

Wakes you up in the middle of the night for the dumbest reasons and pokes you until he's sure you're awake.

"Hey. Hey hey hey hey hey hey-"

"...What..?"

"Ya hungry?"

He would never admit this, but he likes making you laugh. He just finds the way you scrunch up your face so adorable. And your laugh too. He loves your laugh. He could never get tired of it, even if he wanted to.

It is genuinely so difficult to get this guy to say "I love you" because he recharges his courage to actually say it every 6 weeks because he thinks it's SO embarrassing.

Just because he doesn't say it a lot doesn't mean he doesn't. Mammon just finds it difficult to say. So remember that he loves you, will you?

[marihem]

@fransweek 2024

Day 5: Affection

The Most Dangerous Game by @the-writing-mobster

[charmercharm3r]

Masterlist

warning: smut

thinking about hyunjin walking in on you and your not-so-trusty toy…

feeling like you’d had the bullet vibrator pressed to your clit for ages, hand numb, body sweaty, and you just could not find the right angle. the previously recorded videos of you and your boyfriend playing in the background of your headphones and his moans sounding oh, so pretty. but it just wasn’t cutting it for you right now. you need him otherwise you’ll be here for god knows how much longer.

your prayers were answered, though. hyunjin bursting through your bedroom door was a blessing and a curse in disguise. little did you know your needed relief was going to turn into an all night activity when he found you naked in bed.

immediately falling to his knees in front of you and taking the toy from your hand, hyunjin turns off your phone and takes the headphones away to replace the needed sensuality with his own voice. you never realize how much you depended on him for something as simple as making yourself cum.

“my poor baby, how long have you been here? you must be so exhausted.” whether he meant to be so teasing, you didn’t care. you only mewled out for him and reached out to feel his skin on yours.

hyunjin cooed as you gripped onto his forearm and threw your legs over his shoulders. staring at your sopping, puffy cunt, he was mesmerized. such a pretty sight deserved to be treated just as equally kind.

“don’t worry anymore, bunny. i’ll take care of you. you don’t lift a finger. how many times do you wanna cum, hm? i’ll make it happen.”

his presence alone was getting you further than you’d been able to get yourself this entire time. the added comfort of his free hand massaging your thigh and his lips pressing mindless kisses to your belly felt unreal. you held his hand with the toy steady against you, writhing and moaning in his grasp with a fuzzy mind. “oh, you can’t even speak. you’re so precious. i know, i know— you need me all the time. do i make you that insatiable, bunny? just need to have me here all day, every day, never a second apart. there we go, now. let go, baby. cum for me so i can make you cum again, and again, and again.

“my sweet bunny, i’m not going anywhere, you don’t have to cry. oh, but you’re so cute when you do. look at you! i haven’t even touched you yet! haven’t gotten to take off my clothes, you’re so desperate for me.

“i know i said to relax, but i kind of want to make you work just a little bit more. is that okay with you, sweetheart? i promise, it’ll be worth it. let me play with you and you’ll have everything you want. you’re the prettiest when you let me play. you’re always beautiful, but i really do love that frustrated ruffle in your brow when i don’t let you cum. doesn’t it make it feel even better the next time you do? just a few minutes bunny, then after, i’ll make sure you lose count of how many highs i give you, you’ll never wanna come down.”

[the-writing-mobster]

I know the most dangerous game is a Frans fic but I’d be lying if I said you didn’t make me ship your OC Ibrahim and Frans so hard 😭

AS YOU SHOULD! FRISKRAHIM 5 EVER!!!!! He is the sun to her cold Earth! He chases away the winter and melts away the ice! He supports her in every way he can. He is true romance! He is everything she deserves and she doesn't even believe she deserves him at all! IF YOU LOVE IBRAHIM THEN I HAVE DONE MY JOB!!!! It'll make the tragedies of this fic hurt all the worse and your tears taste the sweetest

The Frans of this fic is not really a romantic ship as much as it is a HORRIFYING PREDATOR PREY DYNAMIC that is interesting to explore. BUT IN NO WORLD WOULD FRISK EVER FALL IN LOVE WITH THAT IRREDEEMABLE PIECE OF SHIT!?!? Also Sans just sees Frisk as an object (albeit a fascinating one) to conquer.

This sums up the Frans ship of TMDG:

(also thank you @marihem for those two fabulous pieces of TMDG Fanart hahaha. FOLKS my oomfie draws Ibra so well, she is the BACKBONE of the TMDG fandom)

.

.

.

[hanasnx]

i want to be sk!anakin’s basement wife

MINORS DNI 18+

“you wanna be what?” his feathery voice conveys his amusement as he affectionally pinches your cheek.

“please, ani?” you keen, crawling further into his lap to straddle his thighs. “i’d make such a good one, don’t you think? dress up for you, do whatever you wanted. c’mon.” you seat fully onto him, a growth apparent under his pants as you rock under the guise of frustration— when you really just want to get him harder. “say it, see how it feels on your tongue.”

he moistens his lips, hesitant to oblige you. you get a big head when he obeys any command you give him. the idea of it grips him though, and he draws out his plump bottom lip from his teeth. there’s a sheepish curl to his mouth, as if he can’t believe you’ve said something so unusual. so depraved. his large hands knead your hips, tugging you closer to his chest. “you wanna be my little basement wife.”

[pochiikou]

[wanderingaldecaldo]

📸 by @breezypunk | commission detes

Breezy, am I so predictable that you know how to murder me in two pics? 😩😩😩

[thescarletkiller]

From indifference

To utter devotion

TW: YANDERE

AND FIERY OBSESSION

Disclaimer: For the record, I’m aware that Nacha and Francis’s relationship (at least in this AU) is questionable. Is their dynamic unhealthy? Eventually yes. I’m also aware it’s not something to romanticise in real life. But I can tell you that there certainly is love in their relationship, despite how fucked up it is. After years of being abused and unloved, Francis finally found that love for Nacha. Despite his murderous nature, he does love her in his own twisted obsessed way. And he does what he can to support her and make her feel loved. On Nacha’s end, her love for Francis is reciprocated. Even though she was suspicious of his true nature from the beginning, her worries went away when Francis finally put effort in their relationship. While there were pitfalls, their relationship was very nurturing and warm. Until Nacha finds out what her husband has done.

The story I’m telling here is that how this couple’s wonderful relationship suddenly reached their tipping point. While Nacha became afraid of who Francis truly is, she’s conflicted over feelings for him. Her fear for him and the need for her to escape with Ana or her lingering love she has for her husband. Francis on the other hand, concealed his true nature knowing that Nacha would leave him once she finds out about his crimes. He genuinely does try his best to be a good husband and father but in the grand irony of keeping his family together, they came to fear him due to his declining mental state and growing possessiveness.

It’s not like they’re the ideal relationship but I just love writing their dynamic for this AU. And that MilkBread is a guilty pleasure ship of mine. Call me a basic bitch but I love them.

[spacexseven]

sorry for the late reply! And to answer some of your questions in the tags, it’s actually all three. A “final girl” is a basically a trope that means a character (usually protagonist) that is “pure, feminine, and the victim” during a horror film. They’re usually a victim of chance or have a distant past connection to the killer. Be it their intelligence, connection, or simply pure luck, the final girl is able to avoid death until the end where: 1) they survive to the end and defeat their killer 2) they escape or 3) they die regardless. I was thinking of killer! yan bsd, but I was also intrigued with a victim/final girl! bsd. An example of an idea that’s currently plaguing my mind is Final Girl! Nikolai. I liked the idea of a serial killer targeting magician/or whimsical (maybe ability users) people and choosing nikolai as target. cat and mouse chase, and they end getting the drop on him (how? idk). Its kinda a slow burn horror, but regardless nikolai fights back. this is a gist and example. Tuna, i’m so sorry about throwing this ramble dump at you. 🙈 this is just an idea, nothing you actually have to do. im just happy sharing this with you - 🦄

ahahahaha....there was a lot i had to say about this, but i kept it as brief as i could because i Might...might do a series/oneshot w this au. Maybe &lt;/3 thank you for sharing this gem of an idea i am very excited to dig in nomnomnom. tagged under 'sk reader au 🐟'

gn! reader, is a serial killer & implied to have an ability that can 'collect' other abilities. can be read as a yandere reader.

cw: stalking, murder, violence

ability users are fascinating little things.

especially when they try everything in their power to stay alive. it's a wonderful sight, to see those that always stood above regular people, to see those regarded as gifted, desperately attempt to survive. there was something intoxicating about holding power above the same ability users that were feared by all.

but your interest was less in the users and more in the ability itself.

there was a lot you hoped to learn about abilities, regardless of the type. there must be a reason as to why some were sentient, why some were so much more powerful than others, why some were uncontrollable, and the best way to learn, was of course, through the ability itself. you were willing to do anything to satisfy your curiousity, even if it meant the user had to die for their abilities to join your collection.

you had fond memories with all of them; flawless made for an exhilarating fight, always a step ahead until you sunk your claws into the frightened figure of a dark-eyed ability user, rashōmon was unique, the dark mass almost besting you, but, in the end, you stood victorious over a sickly body—even if you hadn't gone after it, this was an ability that wasn't meant to survive for long, and you liked to think that it was for the best that it joined you instead of disappearing with its user. and of course, discourse on decadence was unforgettable. you remembered it belonged to some goverment agent who was hot on your trail—it was the closest anyone came to stopping you—and your most recent kill.

usually, you didn't like picking favorites. each ability was fascinating and unique in its own way, but it was undeniable that one in particular stood out to you.

the overcoat was an interesting ability. at first sight, it appeared quite simple, but you had viewed it in action too many times to know just how frightening it was. how easy it was to turn it into a lethal weapon—to reach in and twist out a limb or to drain out the blood from a vein. the seemingly unlimited potential of the ability, however, was only one of the aspects that intrigued you.

generally, you've never cared for the users as much as you did their abilities. while you enjoyed the brutal torture you made them suffer, and you liked hunting them down, they always came secondary to their abilities. you didn't care to know their names or their personal stories. despite all that, a name—nikolai gogol—had made his way on your list of targets, scrawled next to his ability.

it'd only take you a minute to identify nikolai in a sea of people.

whether he had the scar over his eye showing or hidden, whether he was wearing glasses or colored contacts, no matter what wig he wore or how ordinary he tried to look, you would immediately be able to point him out. no disguise, no false identity could hide him from you—you know this because he's tried, many times now, to fool you. but you've always known it was him, from the slightest strain of his voice when disguised, the unsettling blankness in his gaze when he looked at you, the subtle upturn of his lips when he approached you. you knew it was him from the way he titled his head when asking you a question, the way he said your name, and even the syllables he stressed when he spoke.

he approached you first as a police officer, then as a detective, a local politician, and even an assassin. You had already noted down each encounter you had with him, the details of each false identity, and what you had learned from it. it was a feat in itself that nikolai had survived so many encounters with you. perhaps it was because of your growing obsession with him,

(somehow, you always knew that your last victim would be nikolai. he'd be a fitting end for your legacy, as the ability user who had been watching you from the very start. the only ability user you could see as more than a shell for his powers. the only one who escaped you once.)

initially, you believed that nikolai followed you around for self-driven justice, to punish you for your crimes. (the policeman getup convinced you of that much), but instead of lunging at you, he watched, enraptured, as you stole the perfect crime, and he followed you closely as you stalked the user of falling camellia, doing nothing to stop you either time. and every time after that, be it walking past him in the busy streets of yokohama or meeting him as your taxi driver, nikolai had yet to try and expose your crimes and exact revenge. he never held a blade up to your throat, never used the very frightening ability of his on you.

his passivity, however, did nothing to quench your bloodthirst.

it was you who attacked him first.

you're no stranger to hunting down your prey. it was something you anticipated now, the sound of footsteps making their way around corners, the sight of shaking shoulders and trembling hands as they hid behind walls, the way fear consumed them when you finally cornered them; you relished in the hunt as much as you did the result.

nikolai doesn't make it much of a hunt. he's quick, with his coat fluttering around him. his footsteps, you remember, are light and quick, his breathing staggered as he laughed wildly. he snatches up your gun with a hand through his coat, and shoots blindly. there is despair consuming his mind, no panic climbing up his spine. his heart rate accelerates not out of fear, but out of thrill, and he looks at you with unrestrained elation. this was no hunt, nikolai wasn't hiding from you—this was a chase. just as you approached a dead end, and you think you can finally, finally, shove him into a corner, nikolai turns to smile at you one last time, before disappearing into a flurry of his coat. as you stand alone, a dark glove laid on the floor ahead of you catches your attention; his glove might have caught on a jagged end and fallen, you think. after cleaning up his mess, you silently pocket it, still haunted by that uninhibited look and that devilish grin.

nikolai is everywhere after that, taunting you.

he sits across you from the train, he takes your order in a restaurant, he applauds you from a distance, after watching you drag away yet another body, congratulating you on another successful kill.

"next time," he smiles at you, all coy and enticing, "i hope it's me."

you hope so too, but you don't let him have the pleasure of knowing that. the scowl on your blood-streaked face sends him spinning away in giggles.

it wasn't the next time, but after a few more dead bodies and many more warnings about your work are played on the news, you meet nikolai again. nikolai gogol is no easy prey, but you're not one to be bested twice. this time, you don't let him run. you're finally on top of him, blood pooling out of where your knife was stuck in his thigh, his coat ripped off him and abandoned somewhere else. it would be so easy to kill him now, so easy to watch him bleed out and claim his ability as yours, but for the first time, you hesitated on delivering the killing blow.

this time, it's not the ability you're after, is it?

[ladybyakuya]

| THAW + GAKU. 

+cw. — fem!reader, biker au, biker!gaku, biker!nagumo, uzuki, akira, kashimo are mentioned, background uzurion & taroaoi; no fluff or smut so idk what to mention except, heavy pining, tension, first meet, and flirting. Will there be more? Lets see? 

+wc. —1.2k 

+syn.— oya? A new face in town? A new trophy to win? Perhaps. . .

+notes. — thought too much about biker!gaku while listening to Tough by l d ray and now i’m here.| redirect to blog navigation.

Gaku always ties his ace hand bandages on both hands all by himself while the spectators watch him do it, slowly surrounding him like a bevy of stars, boys and girls alike thinking what if he needs help, what if he picks one of them but he never picks someone from the crowd to do it. It is a holy ritual for him, a gesture of good luck before he secures a win against the rival gang but tonight as he spots a new face among the crowd and that too in the rival gang he can not help but wonder who might you be! 

He sees you hiding behind one of the top bikers in the rival gang, Rion Akao clutching onto her arms like it is a last stick in the sea to survive, eyes lingering all over the place with a downpour of worry and fear. Why did Akao-san bring you here? Or were you that curious that she could not dismiss your demand? Did you throw a tantrum? Oh my my! Are you the tantrum-thrower type? Kei who is standing by his side notices how Gaku’s hand movements have ceased while doing his silly habit for what he calls “a holy ritual.” 

He nudges Gaku’s elbow saying, “Oye focus.”

“Huh?” was all Gaku yielded from his chest looking at Kei and then looking at you asking, “Who’s that? Never seen her before.”

“That’s Rion. You truly need those eyes to get checked.” While Geku’s eyes still watch you from the gaps of the crowd, his eyebrows pinch at first; then he turns his head towards Uzuki exclaiming with a tone of taunt laced underneath, “Really now! You have eyes only for Rion-san but no one else, huh?” as he leans over the engine of his bike and everyone in the crowd vocally swoons in unison at his stance which certainly makes you notice that particular crowd surrounding a biker on the opposite side of the road.

Uzuki’s eyes go flat like a heart monitor of a dying patient. He can’t put up with this now! Literally can’t.Not again. The visible annoyance on his face does not go unnoticed by Gaku and hence, he decides to salt and pepper it as the announcement starts to blare, “Everyone! clear the path. The race is going to start soon. Everyone! clear the path The race. . .”

Today’s crowd is not that rowdy so Kashimo does not have to hurt his throat and lungs much. Sometimes he has to take medicine but that happens on special days, like when there is a race match between Taro and Uzuki. 

As the crowd disperses, Nagumo gets ready for his race against Gaku. The former holds his helmet in his hands as Rion whispers in his ears. Nagumo laughs as Rion steps away with a serious expression while he laughs before stating,” Sure. Sure. I will take her on a ride for sure,” looking at you. 

“I will not wear a helmet though.” You demand. One of Nagumo’s eyebrows jumps; not that Nagumo is reluctant to your choice yet feels the urge to look at Rion. Her expression does not help him much. 

“No. can’t do. Safety first lady.”  Nagumo chimes.

Now the road is occupied by the two bikers who are about to race against each other. Most of the crowd had stepped back to the pavement alongside the road. Gaku still has not completed his ace bandage, which is spotted from where Kashimo is announcing. He was just about to ping Uzuki about it but things take an unexpected turn.

Standing among the crowd, you laugh at Nagumo’s silly antics while Rion scolds him. Gaku glances at Kei before he extends his arm towards the other side of the road. The unified commotion of the crowd dissipates gradually as you finally lay eyes on him. You see the guy opposite Nagumo swallowing, the movement of his Adam’s apple is painfully visible. It takes a while for everyone to understand who is he pointing at.

Rion and Kei exchange looks. While Kei lets his fingers skim through his hair in disbelief a smile tugs up along Rion’s lips. “Go on. He is harmless,” says she swatting her hand making your lithe grip let loose. You look at Aoi who is standing beside Taro holding his hand because Rion saying ‘harmless’ is not the kind of gauging you can easily rely on. Aoi smiles at you while Taro just nods. Now, what’s that supposed to mean? You look at the biker on the opposite side of the road who is still waiting, extending his hand out towards you. 

You sigh, just once but with the silence that got clustered in this place within a few minutes your sigh sure sounds heavy. You cross the road, stand in front of Gaku, and grace him with a two-second eye contact before holding those dangling bandages. You tilt your head and inspect. There is not much to be done, except wrapping the tape around his fingers and the thumb part has already been done. It is a good thing that you knew otherwise it would be so embarrassing. Maybe he would instruct you or show you how to do it on one of his hands so that you could do the other. You secure the wrapping with the velcro ends it had. Your ears pick up a question, “Are you new around here?”

Gaku gives you his other hand with a tape coming out of his pocket. You look at him with a surprise washing over your face, lips visibly apart as your eyebrows pinch. Is this guy for real? “No. Not really,” you say inserting the loop over his thumb. You need a sort of support to achieve the tight binding it demands. A part of you wants to avoid any sort of skin contact not because he is a stranger or an acquaintance of an acquaintance but because you would like your boundaries to be protected. So, you scoot forward a little letting his fingertips rest on the leather jacket yours,  the left side where your heart resides, while holding his wrist that has already been wrapped. You start to wrap the tape around his wrist then diagonally when Gaku notices how even your heart beats. It makes him nervous. 

“What will you be doing after this race?” Your movement pauses for like two seconds and then you continue. “Are you free?” Gaku can feel your heart rate. It is not calm anymore. You tie around his knuckles, then move to wrap in between his fingers one by one taking your time while the grip on his wrist grows firm. You can feel his pulse too. It is throbbing like an old light in the attic.

“Am not,” you utter, sticking the two ends of velcro one over the other. Glancing at him once you get back to the other side of the road getting behind Rion like you did before but this time not holding her hand or Akiras who is smiling and giving you looks. 

“That was an odd display of . . . affection?” The mike is alive again. Gaku looks like he just has his pants. 

“You really need to teach him some manners Kei.”  Gaku voiced. 

Uzuki lets out a chuckle offering the most humble response, “Now why would I do that?”