#sisi talking
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Warning: this is an emotional writing about me failing my bachelor and what happened to me today (there will be some little disturbing stuff, you've been warned)
Today was the most heart breaking day I've ever had in my life with the bachelor, not because its the first time I've failed it, that was not the problem I don't care if I failed it again, I've got a shock attack of what happened before me knowing that I failed
so I was waiting for the official site of the bachelor result to open, as I got a call from my father that my school got some results early and they got mine, and they said that I had a 13.08/20, and I was overwhelmed by the happiness as I rolled in tears and got on the ground smiling as my mom cried with me joy tears, I was so happy I've never got a 13 before since I was a middle school, as I believed that I really worked on this year's bachelor, but after exactly 40 minutes, something happened
My father called again, as he said that the result that my school gave him was a mistake, they said that they've been wrong with my name and they gave me my cousin's result that lives right down my feet, since we share the same family name...
I had a shock attack as I heard my mom said: SHE DIDN'T GOT IT??! I fell on the ground half unconscious, as my mom panicked as she yelled at my father for not telling us sooner, she was way weaker than me she doesn't know how to handle these kind of situations, right now she is still trying to hold her tears and trying to calm down for the past 7 hours from what happened
As for me, I was on the ground as my younger brothers helped each other laying me on the wall, I couldn't move, I couldn't talk, I couldn't cry, I couldn't do anything, I only tried to move my eyeballs only slightly trying to look and process what was happening around me, which I didn't, my father came and tried to calm my mom, as he was shocked to see me on the ground sitting and unable to move, both of my grandma and aunt tried to talk to me, I couldn't listen, they tried to wake me up from the ground, that didn't work either, my dad even slapped me to gain some conscious, that didn't work too and didn't even felt the slap, I was on the ground only looking at the wall beside me, not even trying to blink for an hour and a half, as my mom stoped crying loudly and only swinged back and forth, I got up, gave my father my laptop to double check on my actual result, and went to my room, layed on the bed on the opposite side, I finally felt the pain from the shock earlier, it was painful, really painful, but luckily my other aunts and uncle called me from the US and canada and told me that all my aunts and uncles redone their bachelors more than two times when they were on my time and age, they convinced me that faillng mine is not really something to be really worried, and everything should be okay you really don't have to be worried, I wasn't shocked about the fact that I failed it, what I was shocked about is that me thinking that I got my bachelor was a lie, this was gave me a heart attack and almost died at this point
I am fine right now, only my eyes tired from crying both from happiness and pain i felt before as i am writing this, sorry if i made some of you upset from reading this, and i know that some of you dosn't understand why all of this happened from a bachalor degree and why am i crying over it, as i learned that both Americans and Europeans doesn't necessarily need a bachalor degree to go to university, as for me as an algerian, i need to have a bachalor degree for every specialty that exist in a university that i attend to, and if i don't have it, i either drop out from school, or redo my bachelor without school or with it, so that's why i'm sad and shocked
thanks for every friend that suported me with my bachelor, i've got a 9,80/20 (which its close to the passing degree 10,00/20) , its sad that i lost this one too like last year, but i'm not giving up yet, i am redoing it again next year, but without school this time
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Girl you grew up in Munich
#they call her a ''county girl'' like four times in this ep ahhh#this series wants to be sooo different yet they fell into all the ''sisi cottagecore princess who talks to animals'' stereotypes lol#die kaiserin rewatch#anti die kaiserin
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I was supposed to read a silly little historical romance about Sisi on my trip to Vienna, but instead I read a book with an ending so frustrating that I went to bed angry last night and woke up still grumpy about it
#now i hate this book for its ending#but i forgot to upload the Sisi romance on my ereader before i left 😭#genuinely hate it not just 'so good i hate it' or whatever#btw#the book i ended up hating is#how to kill your family#by bella mackie#that ending SUCKS ASS#i'm genuinely disappointed and frustrated#books#booklr community#booklr#maddie talks
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sisyphus would probably get SUCH a kick out of poking fun at gabriel and joking about his decapitation
#the convo gets awkward and he brings it up on the edge of crying laughing. Angel. Do you remember that fateful moment?#gabriel still remembers VERY well and feels VERY bad about it but he cant tell sisy to not talk about it bc HE fucked up.
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Niche history ramble(also boy king mention at the end ofc) //
I was reading abt Maximillian I today, the second Habsburg emperor, bcs ive prev read about his father who I think is very interesting. But omg somehow this guy is even more interesting, but in a completely different way(I like his father Frederick III bcs I think his life is very funny ooc, but Maximilian I is genuinely really cool!) Also it's surprising to me that it took me this long to read about him, considering I very vividly remember seeing his portrait in a museum in Vienna. It's weird looking at it being used as the display pic for his wiki page bcs im like ...I've seen that in real life omg....
He's referred to as "The Last Knight"(as well as being nicknamed "Heart of Steel") And god I love now having random knowledge, cause I'm reading this like "ha, how very Don Quixote of him" and then the very next line in the biography was like, historians question whether he genuinely was like a knight or if he was a Don Quixotic figure 😭😭 glad to see I was on mark. Anyways, I wonder if Cervantes knew abt this, like I wonder if him being popularized as the last knight was a widely known thing back then. It's funny how Don Quixote was written at the end of the 16th century, but even back in the beginning of the century, being a knight was still kinda an outdated thing. I like how the two views on Maximillian I are either that he was the Last Knight or the first Rennaisance prince who had Machiavellian ideals. It fits into my weird obsession w those two works(The Prince and Don Quixote)
Anyways that being said. Boy King au Fernando is def like this, except he has literally nothing to back it up djfkkglg. Like at least Maximilian I was actually out there being insane. Fernando just sits in his cozy reading room, fantasizing while reading The Prince, and commissioning suits of armor as decoration(thats what he says. The real purpose is to dress up in them so he can feel cool.) I think this is honestly a reason he goes along with the marriage. He begrudgingly finds Seb's family history to be very cool and interesting, and he isn't opposed to being around it 🤭 Well, begrudgingly isn't the right word. He's very earnestly obsessed with it, but he can never tell Seb that bcs Seb will literally never let it go.
Seb just finds him staring up at paintings of Seb's ancestors, and Fernando, tears in eyes, hand on his heart, proclaims "I'll continue your legacy!!!" Seb is both mocking him like "he's not even your relative" but also has tears in his eyes like omg he's my family 🥺 he's accepted being my family 🥹
#suffering in silence: no one irl wants to hear my habsburg stories </3#im in an austrian studies class and im like omg right up my alley#and then all he talks about are sisi and franz josef SOB#this is very pretentious of me and ALSO a joke yknow#but he showed a family tree of the Habsburg. but it started at the top w maria theresa#so like. its not really a habsburg family tree. its the habsburg-lorraine tree :)#ik it goes back way too far for us to be able to meaningfully cover all of it or even a lot of it#but im like YOU KNOW THERES PEOPLE FROM BEFORE RIGHT??? 😭#as i said to my friends. if theres photographic evidence of this person then i am not interested#<- basically. pre 19th century guys are my favs :)#i mean i like josef ii and maria theresa but ideally my favs are early 1700s and earlier#well anyways#this comes hand in hand w my characterization of boy king stuff#like i read these and i am genuinely interested and want to regal it to other people bcs yay history!#but then my second thought is: okay how do i apply this to the boys#im getting deeper into fernando's characterization lately#i think hes the type to be like. i was born in the wrong century 😔#catie.rambling.txt#boy king au
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I don’t even go to Empress Sissi school, but I’m still so hyped for this to drop on Lingopie. I just thirst for them to get more historical anything content and when they finally feed me a scrap I get enthused.
#I think I’m one of the only diehard loyalists to Lingopie#i unironically enjoy their content and their system really helped me and I always sound like an ad when I talk about them#but their historical content is ass. their Russian section has more frev stuff than their French section which is some sort of war crime#imo. but even that helped me with my Russian so what can I say#sisi#sissi
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Neurodivergent characters in Super Monkey Ball
Only one of these has a canon name for their disorder, the rest are implied so much that they may potentially be canon too
1. Doctor
-> Out of everyone, Doctor is the only character who has a label for his disorder, which is amnesia. And although it isn't entirely accurate representation of amnesia, it also isn't terrible as they don't portray him in a way that creates a mockery of amnesiac people in general.
-> besides that, he's also incredibly smart, so his IQ has to be through the roof practically, so maybe giftedness? Either way, he is portrayed as someone who is well-respected among individuals (hence the name Doctor, which was given by the public) (also I imagine when he was in school he was super popular due to his high intelligence)
2. YanYan
Probably not canon, but then again she litterally shows these in the games so it may be so
To start I would say she possibly shows **a few** signs of autism and although they never said anything about her having it, I feel like she probably does
-> For one thing, she **absolutely cannot sit still, AT ALL.** as seen in the games, she's constantly moving around, even when sitting down, something some sensory-seeking autistic people experience
-> Another thing, she is canonically described as being "fearless," which gets me thinking, maybe she doesn't fear anything even when it potentially puts her life in danger (for example a moving car headed her direction) (they probably mean she doesn't fear any bad guy she faces, but still).
-> Oh yeah SUPER MONKEY BALL BOUNCE AND she's the only one out of everyone who cries when she was kidnapped. Not just teary, watery eyes, I mean FULL ON WAILING which is kind of surprising because for someone who's supposedly "fearless," she's just there letting her emotions out. But why does she cry this much? Maybe it was the feeling of that green gooey web that she's tied up with, perhaps she hates the feeling of it and it upset her to the point of crying?
-> Also she's apparently shy, which honestly contradicts her actually being "fearless," but anyway, some autistic people are shy (depends on where they are on the spectrum), and although not all shy people are autistic, she could be since she experiences some of the other things (the constantly moving around is a big thing)
-> Also I think she has a lack of social awareness because she canonically has a crush on AiAi and even flirts with him even though their biological son is **right there** so shouldn't she be aware of that already? My prediction is that they throw hints and cues that any allistic person would understand and go "ok so I guess I can't date him because he's married and they have a son from the future" but YanYan doesn't seem to understand any of that, instead thinks she can still have a chance with him
3. Jam
-> Ok so this one's rather short but absentmindedness and hyperactivity are both signs of ADHD and since Jam shows both of these... :)
4. Pospos
-> I've went in-depth with this but he canonically shows signs of anomic aphasia or dysmonia, which is when you have trouble retrieving the correct words from memory, which happens to him a lot. He has trouble remembering names, which actually interferes with his job and ability to communicate overall. This is shown in-game when he struggles to remember the names of people he has to deliver mail to. He also seems to not make very good eye contact and shows signs of being shy, which I believe his disorder leads to.
5. Sisi
-> So, normally people wouldn't have to have pictures of everyone they meet to tell whether or not they exist, but just that one like tells everything ("I take pictures of everybody I meet, it's the only way I know they really exist"). The only explanation I can think of is he deals with hallucinations, specifically people. It may be only one line but he could possibly be schizo-spec because again, that piece of dialogue implies he hallucinates people and therefore takes pictures of everyone as the only real way of knowing whether they're real or not
#kris talks#super monkey ball#yanyan#sisi#pospos#doctor#jam#dereality tw#<- just in case for the last paragraph#i litterally had this in my head this morning
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let’s be real for a sec: if rusong were still alive, nhs wouldn’t have hesitated in killing him
#mdzs#mdzs talk#jgy tag#nie huaisang#jin guangyao#it’s like jgy adjacent but you know#this little ramble is gonna be kinda dark jsyk#it was NOT a coincidence that jgy AND qin su AND mo xuanyu were all dead by the end#i’m convinced the only reason he didn’t kill sisi was bc he needed to use her against him#honestly part of me has this theory that nhs was actually involved in rising’s death to begin with#talking to the right people and planting suggestions here and there#there’s a solid part of me that thinks nhs may have been perfectly fine with lxc dying too#if it meant hurting jgy more#it certainly wasn’t something he could aim for because that would be a logistical nightmare#TWO dead sect leaders at once? LWJ??? as sect leader????#but i think he would have been just fine if lxc had died in the middle#both mxy and qs committed suicide#i wonder if that would have been enough to push jgy over the edge#also btw ‘killing him’ here is shorthand for ‘getting him dead somehow’#i don’t think he would do any dirty work himself
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Fight scenes in action films are what songs are to musicals
#too long for me to understand whats happening#they also stop talking so there's no subtitles for me to follow#in fight scenes its like 'HA...........*10 minutes later* This is for my mother'#and songs 'Lalalalatrilalala for my mom and my sisi and my bro and your grandma lalala something for the plot i exist bc i was born lalo'#and my mind wanders off so its jard to follow im staring at the screen like 😶#and then wake up#hard*
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hoy me compré un perfume y conseguí el labial de nivea, blackberry shine, que no se veía hace mil años!!! peace and love on faggot earth (mi mente)
#el perfume fue un regalo de cumple pero lo fui a comprar yo kjj#bel talks#sisi a nadie le importa pero hoy no estuve tan triste
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biden calling egypt mexico....like omg bro we were mexicans this whole time, wallahi??? damn
#context: biden called abdelfattah el sisi (apparently our prez) the president of mexico#levi's ted talks#not ninjago#joe biden
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Episode 4 done! This series just dgaf anymore about anything lol
I have a lot of thoughts but I'm going to boil it down to the one thing that has been bothering me since the beginning of the season: I can't stand Sisi. She has become the charicature many authors make of the real Elisabeth, the utterly selfish woman that only lives for pleasure and thinks of no one but herself. Which would be fine as a character arc (I don't love it but character regression is an arc nonetheless) but I just don't feel that is how it's being presented. Sisi taking Rudolf in the middle of the night without even a lady to help her was stupid, her trusting a random woman and agreeging to travel with her was even more stupid, her leaving Rudolf with the father of the random woman while she goes out is the most stupid thing. But the way things so far have been framed, Sisi is in the right because we know (solely because of hindsight) that the military training is going to be awful for Rudolf. It's only in episode 4 where Sisi's actions have been presented as, if not wrong, at least mistaken, but to me she has been wrong the entire season. But let's see how they wrap this up in the next two episodes.
The only positive thing I can say is that this is at least consisting with the way her character has been since season 2, in which she also made impulsive desicions without thinking on the consequences. The problem is that so far there hasn't been any consequences lol no wonder she just does whatever she wants at this point.
#''she is doing this for rudolf!!!'' she has actively abandoned gisela to go party with a woman she just met#rudolf and sisi barely interact despite being together the whole season. she is always talking with alma while he plays at the distance#she didn't even ask him if he wanted to leave vienna!!!!#sisi live blog#sisi (2021)
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hi love!! how are u??? It's been a while, I hope ur doing okay ^^ I missed u a lot <3 make sure to take care of yourself and stay healthy -🥐
lili 10:46pm
MY SWEET💋 I've missed you sooooo much 😭😭 I'm doing great! how have you been? you as well hon, take care of yourself for me 🤍 sending you my love and kisses sisi💋🤍
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It’s so absurd to see Sisi on my dash. It’s like tumblr took a peek into 12 year old me’s mind and went “yeah, that unlikeable eating disordered horse woman with the bad teeth and the Heine obsession sounds like the perfect it girl”
Then again, tumblr WOULD think that.
#I remember being soooo obsessed with her bc of the pretty dresses#I forced my mother to go to the Sisi museum in Vienna and everything#and that museum sure was a wake up call.#I still read a biography years later and that biographer sure did not have many kind feelings towards her it seemed#and now people are talking about her???!!! on MY dash?!#I remember seeing a yassified portrait of her floating around a while back#and everyone in the notes acted like it was the real portrait as if she didn’t have anime nose syndrome#anyways I relate to her because my teeth are S H I T. so idk sisters in bad teeth I guess. plus I like Heine and write bad poetry. so.#once more a ‘disliking the self through the other’ type situation
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There's a guy.
He's a guy but under like. a question mark
theoretically he's a guy.
but is he a Guy?
He is. he's a silly guy. he sees nonexistent guys
the nonexistent guys taunt him and torture him with painful lies, and they strain his psyche with unbearable imagery, with background noise
(it's schizophrenia he's had all his life)
He lives with a granny and her husband. They took him in when he was at death's doorstep, accompanied by his one truest known lover
who afterwards disappeared without a trace. Only leaving his razor blade necklace behind.
The Guy has no clue what happened, or why his love left. Only that he was left alone, stuck in a two-day coma with noone but his thoughts and the old couple for company.
At 17, he ran away from his family home, which could supply him with guaranteed stable income, a warm meal and water, comfortable bed and utilities
for the sake of being with a person true to themselves, who questioned him rarely, but with reason
Not a long time later
He went and almost lost himself to his own very poorly executed decision, at just 19.
He paid with an eye for it.
Now, at the supple age of 25
The Guy manages his life as best he can with no life knowledge, no friends, no solid income, and probably no unexpired documents
and a lot of annoying ass fuckin "ghosts in his head".
He is
Benito Rogaci.
#queer artist#tumblrpost#julitocs#my ocs#artists on tumblr#tumblr writing? i guess?#i did this for fun so the blog isnt that dead anymore idk im exploring#yes this is my oc yes hes my fav lets talk about this later#tumblr writes#how to write well#sisi spaghett
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I think I’m at a point in my life where I don’t like taking people at face value whether we’re having a normal chat or proper discussion about something. If someone I’m talking to makes a claim about something, I want to know where said claim is coming from or do they have any evidence to back up why they think that way.
I think it’s also shaped my perspective on how takes on media are subjective rather than objective. Like if you say I don’t like insert movie here, that’s totally fine and that’s your opinion. But if you’re gonna say a movie or show is objectively garbage then I’m gonna about how it is bad whether it comes to acting, writing, production value, etc. I’m not a fan of when someone responds with ‘it just is’ when I ask why.
I apologize if anyone disagrees with this but this is just my own personal viewpoint.
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