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urmultideadfandomperson · 1 year ago

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Hey!! I hope you're having a wonderful day! I just saw that your requests are open and I wanted to request something myself.

How would the ARTW main sorcerers react to summoner being a renowned novel author?

MC is Renowned Novel Author

Character/s: Summoner (MC), Arcturus, Spica, Pollux, Alpheratz, Sirius, Vega

Genre/s: Fluff, Cracks

Warning/s: None

Summary: The Guides discover that Summoner is a famous author back in Mid Eartheim!

Requested by: Anonymous

Note: Hello, anon! Thank you so much for this ask! I sincerely apologize for the long release of this request. The loss of motivation and busy schedules have always been a hassle nowadays! Hopefully this will make it up for the lost time. May you enjoy you read!

Arcturus

Arcky found out when he saw you carrying a typewriter.

He was curious what it was, especially since he is unaware of such an item that belonged in Mid Eartheim.

When you told him about it, he gasps in surprise, eyes sparkling in delight.

He immediately turned into one of your fans, asking questions and getting updates. You were just awesome! The Summoner was a famous author!

If you want, you can let him read your novels. Arcturus' reaction will be overjoyed, honored to be able to read your novels.

This sorcerer will definitely dig down deeper in order to get more information and concepts that were scrapped.

If you like to put plot twists, Arcky would least expect it. You might hear him gasp loudly or see his face change to shock.

If you have a character who is bubbly and a people-pleaser, he will frown in pity and empathy, relating to the character a lot.

If you like tragedy, Arcturus always sobs to it. After reading, he will go through the five stages of grief for the deceased character. You actually broke him with a novel.

But if you write novels with spicy scenes... he cannot handle them very well. Arcturus' face turns red and he cannot bring himself to speak at all.

Overall, he loves you and your novels. He is so lucky to be yours.

"Summoner! I have an idea for your novel! Can I tell you about it?"

Spica

The sorcerer may or may not know what a typewriter is.

Spica deducted that it was used for writing purposes, but he cannot point a finger for what specifically.

So when he discovered you were a novel author, he is both surprised and impressed.

He is a bookworm, himself. He is certain you have done a great job in writing the novels (especially since you're famous back in Mid Eartheim).

Spica is highly honored to be able to read your novels for free! Because, wow. The Summoner is a novelist!

As much as he enjoys the read, there are times where he will suddenly turn into a book critic.

Not that he will insult the book and disgust the characters and writing. Spica will be giving constructive criticism, also giving some tips on how to improve the writing.

Spica will binge read your books if they are an entire series. You cannot stop him.

If you write angst and tragedy, the sorcerer will just silently mourn. He will not cry, he will not scream. He will just be quiet.

If you write spicy scenes, Spica will be a bit flustered. He has read other scenes like this before (ayo?? 🤨📸), so he can handle it. He is one of the professionals he reads smut with a straight face.

And when writer's block attacks you again, Spica will do his best to help you get motivation. But if you need some rest, then he will also help you relax.

"Your writing style is very unique, Summoner. I'll be looking forward for more of your novels,"

Pollux

He found the typewriter. He started to use the typewriter.

Pollux was basically playing around with it, typing on every single letter while making the weirdest sentences ever.

So when you told him that you use to typewriter for work purposes, he got curious. And when you told him that you were a renowned author...

... he immediately stopped.

NO WAY! You use this thing to make books?!

Pollux now treats the typewriter as a sacred item. As if he is going to play around with something to important.

And to avoid breaking it because his bad luck is awful.

Anyway, he will definitely books that has some action and cool fighting scenes. If you do write action novels, this sorcerer is BLESSED.

Being the tsundere he is, Pollux will not admit that he is in love with romance scenes. He says he dislikes romance, and yet he is often found blushing and giggling about it.

If you like to add plot twists in your stories, he will overreact and begin to screech. Then he will rant to you about the entire twist, still in disbelief.

As for the spicy scenes... he fails at keeping calm, always opening and closing the book with a red face. He even almost threw your book at the intense intimacy the characters shared.

"Summoner, summoner! I can't believe you added another plot twist in the part! I need to tell you about it!"

Alpheratz

He was just napping somewhere nearby where you were working. Because of the noise the typewriter creates, his nap was disturbed.

Alpheratz questions you with a grumble why it creates noise, and you tell him that the typewriter is just like that.

And when you finally revealed that you were a well-known author in Mid Eartheim, his eyes shot up and the urge to sleep was gone.

Believe it or not, Alpheratz is actually a bookworm. Not many is aware of this fact, but whenever a book really gets his attention, he will read it.

He likes to ask questions about the book and its concept. Hearing about the unique structure of the novel will get him hyped up to read it more.

Sometimes, he likes to read your novels as bedtime stories. He goes to a certain chapter that is calm like a memory, reads it, and goes to sleep in peace.

If you are letting Spica borrow a certain book and Alpheratz is craving to read it, he will sneak in and snatch the book when Spica is not looking. In the end of the day, Spica will be confused where the novel is while the latter reads it happily.

If you write romance, he would not mind at all. He does not hate romance, though he doesn't really like them either. Alpheratz is neutral with romance.

If you like to write spicy scenes, he is the second sorcerer who can read the novel with a straight face. But when the night arrives... use your imagination~ 😜

The sorcerer enjoys giving ideas like Arcky, though he is calmer. Instead of going to detail, he simply explains the whole picture. He wants you to use his idea to make another novel.

In conclusion, he is in love with your novels. He is blessed by the stars to be able to read your treasures in Mid Eartheim.

"Summoner~... I had a dream in my nap and it was nice. Maybe turn it into a new novel? Don't worry, I won't push.",

Sirius

You already caught his attention not by the typewriter, but by your vocabulary whenever you speak.

Deliberately? Pulchritudinous? Equivocate? Fathom? My, Summoner, those words are very complex.

Sirius somehow knew that you were an author. Maybe because of your use of words? Or perhaps you bring that typewriter everywhere? Could it be that you were a famous novelist in Mid Eartheim? You will never know; it's Sirius, after all.

That does not mean he is not impressed, though. The sorcerer really is surprised! He just does it so casually, you thought he is being nonchalant.

Whenever he reads your book, he gives constructive criticism but... they sound like teasing instead of actual advice.

Sirius is not much of a bookworm. For him, reading is more people who enjoys indoor activities. He does praise your works, though.

But if you write a fantasy novel and it has a map on the page? Oh boy, you might have gotten his interest in that book.

Sirius is neutral in romance. He does not hate it, yet he does not like it either. However, he will dislike it when it includes self-sacrificing because of, well, what happened to Polaris.

And when you write spicy scenes, this man is SHAMELESS!

He will not hesitate to read the book around you, even doing facial expressions and adding sound effects as he reads. As you listen (in embarrassment), Sirius will laugh.

But if you play your cards right when you tease him, you might find yourself seeing Sirius with a flustered expression.

"Summoner, what is this character saying? Their speech to the antagonist is quite bland and monotone, don't you think? Let me show you how it's done,"

Vega

He already knew it was a typewriter when he saw it. However, similar to Spica (if he knows what a typewriter is), Vega cannot point out where it is used for.

Vega is mildly envious at your vocabulary. He speaks very formally, but your way of speaking sounds like you belonged in royalty.

When you finally revealed that you were a famous author back in Mid Eartheim, Vega was so shocked and so proud of you.

It was a vague memory. But in the back of his head, he can remember how you once always dreamed of writing books and let the people read it.

And now that you achieved that dream, Vega is more than happy for more. In fact, he will fully support your career.

The sorcerer always compliments your novels. No matter how old it is, no matter how inexperienced, no matter how bad, he is still proud and impressed in your works. At least you can write something!

If you choose to write a novel about your friendship, Vega will be both happy and uncertain. He is joyous because it is an honor to be written in your novel. But also hesitant, as it brings back bad memories as well.

Either way, Vega is the type of person who will love romance. As a matter of fact, Vega craves romance. The intimacy, the kisses, the beginning of a relationship... it is so beautiful for him, especially if it is with you.

If you enjoy writing angst, Vega actually cries. He tries not to let the tears spill. But when a certain sentence or event happens in the book, he breaks down.

And if you like to write spicy scenes, Vega will use a straight face at first before it eventually turns into a blushing mess. He cannot even look at you in the eyes!

"Why not use these ideas for your new novel, Summoner? Everyone will enjoy it, I am certain. Perhaps I can help?"

#arcana twilight #arcana twilight arcturus #arcana twilight spica #arcana twilight pollux #arcana twilight alpheratz #arcana twilight sirius #arcana twilight vega #arcana twilight summoner #arcana twilight mc #arcana twilight nation #arcana twilight headcanons #artw

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okamirayne · 1 year ago

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Rayne, last episode was awesome!! Just here to remind you that your work is loved by everyone! Shipps in fandom tend to have a person, yk, that internet usser that opens people's eyes and teaches them about a rarepair like its a master class. For me, you are that person. 💗💗 You've done a lot for the shikaneji community, I don't know a single person that ships them and doesn't know about you! You kinda inspired me to learn english years ago because I'd just straight up translate everything with the google translator extension 😂 It's been years since then, and now I read the btb series comfortably in its native language. And there's where I have to ask you something: To celebrate the new HHU's chapter, I'm rereading the whole BtB series. I'm currently in Requiem, but something it's been in my head making noise enough for me to come here and ask you! In Break to Breath, chapter 28, I think they're in Hanegakure and the boys did what hot traumatized boys do... However they're woken up next morning and it is said that Sikamaru tied up his hair with Neji's tie, what Neji did with his hair wasn't mentioned so I always thought that they used each other's ties from then on... Until the very end. Because during the war, Neji isn't using a hairtie, maybe he didn't want to lose it and he save it along Shikamaru's note.

It's never explicitly stated that they got their hairties back, so my favorite headcanon (having people creating headcanons over your fanfic? ur the GOAT) about BtB has allways been that Shikamaru didn't give Neji his hair tie back, and viceversa.

Like when you have a partner in real life and, well, you cannot make a public statement about being together o maybe you cannot see them everyday, so (if you have long hair) you give them your hair tie for them to use in their wrist or properly in their head.

To summarize, what are your thoughts on this? 👀

It's been a while since I last reread the series, so I don't remember this fact being brought up again, at least it wasn't ever mentioned again in Btb nor OtC. Hair ties are mentioned again, but not this. So I live in delulu and imagine them playing with the hairties when they feel lonely/sad. However if it indeed was, then I'm blind and I'm reallyyyy sorry you had to read this 😭

Again, I sincerely love you and the works put online, they're masterpieces and, knowing about the author's block you suffered these years, I hope you're not pressuring yourself on writing! I think we will always wait for you, wheter its BtB universe or your original works 💗

English it's not my first language so I'm sorry if you encouter trouble reading this! xoxo

Sweet Anon 💗💗

Please forgive me if I struggle to find the right words - always a challenge when I am hit so hard by the mega-feels that I'm reduced to a puddle of pure emotion...

There is so much I am thankful for in your beautiful message. The reassurance and kindness of welcoming me back onto the writing stage after such a crippling absence. The sweetness of your incredibly high praise and regard for my work, and the intense combination of humbleness and amazement, learning that you came into the BtB story via Google Translator and took a chance on a fic not in your native language. THANK YOU, for giving my mad story that opportunity, time, investment, and love. I am so touched that the fic gave you traction regarding learning English and that you can enjoy the fic in his native language. Thank you for crossing that language barrier to read my work...again, I'll never not be humbled by that...💗

Thank You for Every Single Word of Kindness and for the monumental love and support your message has contained. I'm so, so touched and so very thankful 💜❤️‍🩹🙏🏼

To celebrate the new HHU's chapter, I'm rereading the whole BtB series.

Aww! I sincerely hope you enjoy the ride once again, sweetie. 🙏🏼

Regarding your question about the hair ties!

[...]...and it is said that Sikamaru tied up his hair with Neji's tie, what Neji did with his hair wasn't mentioned so I always thought that they used each other's ties from then on... Until the very end. Because during the war, Neji isn't using a hairtie, maybe he didn't want to lose it and he save it along Shikamaru's note. [..] It's never explicitly stated that they got their hairties back, so my favorite headcanon (having people creating headcanons over your fanfic? ur the GOAT) about BtB has allways been that Shikamaru didn't give Neji his hair tie back, and viceversa.

Oh I do love where your headcanon has gone.

To summarize, what are your thoughts on this?

I can confidently say, it's a yes. Insofar as Neji allowing Shikamaru to keep his tie when Shikamaru's goes pinging off into the bowels of whatever place they're ravaging each other in...although, I won't lie and say there aren't a few instances where one or the other fight over the last hair tie...

Of course, said fight for the almighty hair tie is always instigated by Shikamaru absolutely refusing to be caught with his hair down, whereas Neji doesn't particularly care, unless he needs it tied back for practical reasons, in which case...may the best genius win. Good luck. 😂

So I live in delulu and imagine them playing with the hairties when they feel lonely/sad. However if it indeed was, then I'm blind and I'm reallyyyy sorry you had to read this 😭

OMG don't apologise! I loved reading this 💗. I'm so happy your mind plays in the BtB madness and again, there's truth to the hair tie sharing (Neji doing the sharing lol and Shikamaru the stealing)

I love and appreciate you in return, dear Anon. BtB would not have happened - would not STILL be happening, if not for the kindness of readers reaching out to share their thoughts, feelings, feedback etc. on the work. You make it possible for me to do it. And for all the words I could ever hope to possess, none of them will ever adequately describe or encompass the enormity of the gratitude, joy, healing, and love I feel hearing from you. 🥰

I honest to gods have no words when it comes to my Original Works and your interest in them...I am just an utterly melted heart, spilling all over the floor of emotion at this point....and I thank you for that beautiful mess and the peace, joy, inspiration, motivation, and reassurance it grants me...bless you, sweetheart. 🫶🏼

Thank you also for your compassion towards my burnout and for the reminder to not pressure myself. Coming with so much sincere love and support, it soothes that awful workaholic and over-thinking streak that has my brain on non-stop and constant insomniac spin. The simultaneous stillness and sky-high floaty feeling I get from your message is a beautiful little cocktail that chills me the hell out when I need it most...and I needed it today, whilst eyeing Chapter 9. 😉😅

English it's not my first language so I'm sorry if you encouter trouble reading this! xoxo

Holy heck, are you kidding me? *bows down in respect* If I tried to write in another language, I would butcher it so hard there'd be no recovering at all. You are fluent, my lovely - coherent and awesome. The only trouble I encountered reading your message was trying to keep my heart from detonating in my chest from the overload of feelings. 💜💜 I thank you for that. It beats the hella insane nerves that eat at me as I return to writing. There's so much heart and healing to be found in this message that I'm sincerely at a loss now....thank you, so, so much.

Huge, HUGE love coming at you from all sides, sweetheart. 🥰

#i'm not crying you are #thank you sweet anon #btb reader kindness #ugh my heart #btb readers #awesome readers are awesome #love and appreciate my readers so damn much #the feels #so much love #btb ask #Shikamaru neji ask #hair tie ask #btb verse ask #anon btb ask

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thelostgirl21 · 2 years ago

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One of my favorite parts of the Radskier romance?

The emotional maturity and healthy relationship expectations of Prince King Radovid when it comes to Jaskier.

Romantic infatuation needs to be nurtured to be given a chance to grow to turn into actual romantic love.

And when someone has developed an emotionally intimate (and potentially queerplatonic) relationship with another person for over 20 years; and built themselves a family also involving that closest friend's romantic partner (Yennefer) and his Child of Suprise (Ciri), you should expect that romantic interest of yours to make that family their #1 priority.

You should find their ability to deeply commit to the ones they already love, and not suddenly lose interest in them as soon as they find someone shiny and new, as a very good sign.

Because it's extremely likely that - should the romantic infatuation you now experience evolve into genuine love - they won't grow tired of you, and/or lose interest in your relationship easily.

You'll become a part of their found family, too.

Sincerely, when I met the man I've now been with for 17 years, if he'd dropped his weekly D&D game nights with the friends he'd had since he was a kid to freaking date me, I'm pretty sure I would have broken things up with him right on the spot!

Actually, one of the first things we did, when we started dating, was meet each other's closest friends, to see if we'd be a good fit in each other's lives.

You often learn so much more about a romantic interest by watching how caring and devoted they are to those they've already emotionally bonded with, than by interacting with them all on your own.

Yes, you also need to take the time to build some intimacy; but your life together as a couple, if you ever reach that stage, is going to be filled with people sharing both your hearts and your time!

There's a difference between that romantic crush of yours making the effort to integrate you into their own lives, and making time for you so you can get to truly know each other and build a connection; and them suddenly neglecting their platonic and/or alterous relationships and no longer making them a priority in their lives because "Hey, look! I've got a romantic interest now!"

If they are neglecting the people they love because you suddenly showed up, I'd consider it deeply, deeply worrying.

17 years later, my partner still plays D&D once a week (and the boys are awesome friends to us both), I have my own personal tribe (my dance troupe) that I'm deeply close to, and one of the girls came to live with us for 2 weeks Sunday night, because she broke up with her boyfriend recently, needs a place to stay, I freaking love her to death, and we're family.

When I asked my partner if he was fine with her staying over and sharing our home, there was no hesitation on his part in saying "Yes".

We care for and support our family, regardless of who our friends are the closest to.

Because, obviously, there is no need for a romantic partner to grow as emotionally close and intimate to some of your best friends as you are. Ex: They don't need to know all of their secrets, listen to them for hours, and hold them in their arms to provide emotional support when they are going through a hard time the same way you would.

But there needs to be respect and support of those relationships. They need to allow you space and time for you to listen to them for hours, and hold them in your arms to provide emotional support when they are going through a tough time.

And vice versa.

When you are helping someone you love through a tough time, the last thing you need is to be worried about your romantic partner being jealous and resentful over the time you are giving others.

And sometimes, you find yourself connecting more strongly with some of their own friends on certain matters, and suddenly becoming their confidante, too. For example, my romantic partner is a monoamorous heteroromantic heterosexual, and I'm an ambiamorous panromantic demisexual pansexual.

When one of his best friends started questioning if he might be polyamorous, and needed someone to talk with to help him figure out his feelings and how best to approach the subject with his romantic partner, my partner immediately went "It's not that I don't want to support you or listen to you, it's just that I've a feeling you should be talking to my girlfriend about this. She'll be more likely to have some intimate understanding of what you're going through, and she's been professionally trained in counseling."

He's got great respect and acceptance of queer identities (wouldn't be in a romantic relationship with me if he didn't), but he gets utterly lost in them and all the definitions and concepts.

I, however, love discussing and exploring them. So, that best friend and I got to learn a lot about each other during our talks, discovered a lot of shared interests, and grew very close.

Actually, we realized that we were extremely alike in many ways, and that Frédérick (my partner) just might have a "type" of person he's more likely to build an emotional connection with, platonically or otherwise.

I'm also aunt and godmother to wonderful children I've got absolutely no blood relations to.

Found families matter at the very least as much, if not sometimes even more, than romantic partners.

And I believe that the way Jaskier is speaking about the people he loves, the lengths and the risks he is willing to go to in order to protect them, is deeply appealing to Radovid.

In Radovid's world, relationships are commodities to be used to gain influence or power.

You "love" what serves you and makes you more politically relevant and influential, and you can potentially drop them as soon as you find something (i.e. someone) that can bring you more influence or be more useful.

He's been forced to live in a toxic, dangerous, and downright deadly environment, filled with relationships based on lies and deceit, where he had no purpose, and was deeply unhappy.

And I think that he wants to have a chance to build a family of his own based on genuine emotional connections, and/or would be delighted to be given a chance to become part of Jaskier's own found family.

He asked "does the Witcher know how lucky he is to have you?" with a sense of wonder for what it must be like to have someone love you the way Jaskier loves, and to be free to love that person back.

Besides his affection for his brother, perhaps, there was nothing holding Radovid back from leaving the castle and the only life he'd ever known behind.

And truth is, I can't even say how healthy his relationship with his brother truly was.

Most of the time, Radovid was pretty much cheering Vizimir from the sidelines and feeding into his narcissism... But, at least, his brother being King gave him an illusion of safety, I think, until the "Hedwig incident" drove home that no one - not even the freaking Queen herself - was safe with Dijkstra and Philippa around.

In terms of his own emotional, psychological, and even physical well-being, Radovid had everything to gain by getting out of there and following Jaskier.

He could thus afford to "leave everything behind" to follow someone he'd met like 5 times in total in his life. In this context, Radovid truly was choosing himself as much as he was choosing Jaskier.

But Jaskier? He's got a family having made a permanent home in his heart, people that he loves, people that rely on him, and emotional connections that he'd give everything to protect.

And so, Radovid chose to help Jaskier keep his own heart safe, by offering to go help him find and protect his family. He wants to be there with and for him.

Radovid very much seems to understand that Jaskier's family means everything to him. He gets it. That's likely one of the reasons why he finds him so special and attractive in the first place.

Jaskier having a family to go to, and having built bonds of love and loyalty, is what makes it worth it for Radovid to leave everything behind for a potential partner that is healthy enough not to.

Jaskier's a freaking keeper, and that prince is smart enough to know one when he finds one!

And, by showing his full respect and support of Jaskier's other close relationships, Radovid is demonstrating that he'd likely be a good romantic partner to him as well.

Someone that would love all of him, including the parts of Jaskier that Radovid would have to share with others.

Perhaps that's why if it weren't for the writers themselves being a potential threat to their relationship, I could definitely see it work.

Of all the people in his life, Jaskier approached that relationship essentially telling Radovid: "This is who I am an what matters to me... The idea of fully settling down at court gives me urticaria; but I'd be willing to do it, at least for a time, if that kept my little niece and her adoptive parents - the people I love more than anything in the word - safe from threats. I'm not always in the mood for songs, or especially "entertaining" to have around. I've been broken hearted and hurt before, and have developed certain trust issues when it comes to relationships... I'm deeply loyal and devoted to those that have gained my trust and have grown very emotionally intimate with... I might lash out to protect my heart, but reassess in light of new evidence that the other person was hurting, too, and trying to keep their own head above water (or downright on their shoulders). I can forgive mistakes and still love regardless... Oh, and from that whole scene you witnessed with Vespula when we first met, I'm assuming that you've already deduced I sort of have a strong, adventurous approach to my sexuality, and am not exactly the monoamorous kind. Should we ever form a romantic couple, I can't guarantee I won't also have other sexual encounters with some of my dearest friends, but also potentially strangers."

And Radovid's like "Yup! That's the man for me, and I'd love to follow you out there in the world if you'll have me!"

So, it's hard for me not to feel at least a bit optimistic.

And, while Radovid obviously can no longer do that (follow him into the world, that is... At least, for now...), I think he might have a realistic enough approach to life and relationships that, should Jaskier try to offer him creative solutions to make it work as best they can in a world filled with uncertainties, he might be able to listen to his ideas, offer solutions of his own, and adapt.

They're two brilliantly empathetic queer boys in love... They've got it!

If they aim for anything conventional or traditional, they're screwed (and not in the fun way)!

If they make their own rules, and design the relationship to fit the way they love rather than how others would want them to love (i.e. pay no heed to what others say to sing, by going with their own needs instead) there's a world of possibilities for them to explore together.

They could have enough together, and be enough for each other.

And, from the way Radovid's been listening to everything Jaskier's been saying (and singing) since they met, and showing a concern for his own safety, well-being and happiness, given the opportunity, he just might be the one to surprise Jaskier and show some very creative thinking of his own.

Because when Radovid decided that what suited him in life was to help Jaskier protect his family, he immediately went into problem solving mode, was very effective, and showed resourcefulness (forget about baths! I need you to take my cloak and everything I have with fur to turn them into money that might help us on our journey).

He's like Jaskier's own Jaskier, in a sense.

"Look, I'm growing very attached to that guy, and if keeping his family safe is such a huge part of who he is, then I'm going with him to look after him!"

Can you imagine if Radovid had successfully gotten out of that castle, though?

You have Geralt ready to declare war on anyone that stands between him and his daughter.

Jaskier coming along to help rescue Ciri and look after Geralt.

And Radovid coming along to help rescue Ciri and look after Jaskier.

Geralt: This is Jaskier, my emotional support bard... and Radovid, my emotional support bard's emotional support Prince.

This is like Darcy Lewis, Jane Foster's intern, having her own intern.

Next thing you know...

Seriously though, each part of the season had such different vibes...

Season 3, part 1: Finally! Jaskier's been adopted into a forever home, and he's got people looking after him and openly appreciating him now! Was about time!

Season 3, part 2: JFC! Not again! *Heavy sigh* Can someone please, please adopt that ridiculous puppy of a Prince?! He needs a forever home and people to look after him, too!

So really, when it comes to how Radovid appears to be handling relationships, that freaking sense of entitlement and self-importance that would have him become a villain absolutely isn't there.

Book Radovid was a 13-year-old boy that was deeply upset that no one noticed him and his mother, and showed them the respect he believed they were owed!

He couldn't wait to show the world what he could do!

He was portrayed as an immature entitled brat to begin with!

This version of Radovid is the exact opposite.

He's like "Look, I'm just useless to the crown and terrible at politics, spying and being a prince... I just want to follow my heart and get out of here!"

He doesn't want the world to see or notice him, he's constantly hiding himself in window alcoves, corners, and trying to make himself as small as he can, for frak's sake!

He even introduced himself to Jaskier going "Ah, Radovid... Comma Prince", putting his Royal identity last.

At first, I thought it was done for humorous purposes, but it's quite telling, actually.

Being "Prince" is like some ball and chain he's been dragging behind him, weighting him down, rather than a source of pride and personal worth.

Having him magically turning into a villain would make absolutely no sense...

I'm not saying they won't do it. But the character's psychological foundations are miles away from the infamous "dark triad".

Will he allow Philippa and Dijkstra to do terrible things in his name? Perhaps. Stockholm syndrome might kick in, and he might find himself emotionally bonding with them to survive and make sense of a world that would otherwise drive him mad.

As someone that's been trauma bonded to a malignant narcissistic mother for almost 3 decades, I know how powerful Stockholm syndrome can be as a psychological protective mechanism.

But I can't fathom Radovid being inherently cruel or tyrannical.

Convincing himself that Dijkstra and Philippa really "like him" and are looking out for him and the Kingdom's best interests because of being unable to face how hopelessly fucked he is? Sure!

Now that he's been violently thrown into the spotlight and deprived of his usual safety mechanisms, Dijkstra and Philippa might capitalize on this by brainwashing him into perceiving them as "misunderstood", and the only people that have ever truly cared about him and/or respected him.

Survival instincts can be a bitch to fight at times and totally cloud your mind. The absence of cruelty becomes read as "kindness", and your ability to comply with their expectations becomes perceived as a way to "control" what happens to you. And thus, you wind up feeling like you have power over the actions of your abusers (the real threat) through your ability to constantly pacify them.

So yeah, if you want to use Stockholm syndrome to make him go against his very nature, and fall prey to the mind controlling skills of two very dangerous people, with very high sociopathic tendencies?

Yeah, that could realistically happen. And Jaskier would become the most dangerous adversary they would ever be facing in the whole freaking Continent.

Every platonic, alterous, or romantic friend or love interest of mine, that my mother didn't approve of and couldn't fully seduce and control, too, she would make sure to drive away.

My mother only ever tolerated the friends and lovers that fed her own ego and reinforced the level of influence she had on my environment and myself.

And it usually worked. I would be adopting her P.O.V. on my relationships, and breaking up with significant others to avoid risking to lose her approval.

Until I met someone that made me feel so unconditionally loved, respected, and emotionally safe - someone that was capable of loving me the way I was, resolve conflicts without seeking to dominate or control me, and always strove for "win-win" scenarios and balance between my needs and his - that her attempts to play the victim and "expose him as the true threat" to my happiness and well-being utterly failed.

Stockholm syndrome / trauma bonding can be broken by someone showing you that you'll have people that love you, support you, will believe you, and will be there to fight by your side should you be brave enough to oppose your aggressor(s) and attempt to break free from their control.

Your mind will start noticing their violence, and let you realise you've never been safe with them when you stop subconsciously believing that you have no way of ever truly escaping their influence, and the situation is hopeless.

So yeah, if Radovid believes everyone in the castle is under Dijkstra and Philippa's control, and there's no one he can trust to follow any order that would go against their will, he might comply, do what they want, and instinctively create a narrative in his mind that would give them the role of allies and protectors.

But Jaskier's one of the most influencial voices of the Continent. "Blood Origin" (that I absolutely loved, by the way... Don't know what so many people seemed to have against it...), was all about showing the power of stories, and the way they could be used to bring Empires down.

Jaskier could likely break their hold on Radovid, and put the power back in his hands, if it ever came down to it.

So, having Radovid become "dangerous" to others, by adopting Dijkstra and Philippa's P. O. V. without being psychologically able to fight their influence on his own until someone makes him snap out of it, and offers him better alternatives?

It's believable.

But him inherently being a genocidal maniac at his core? That would make zero sense. He's way too empathetic and caring about the emotional well-being of others for that.

Jaskier: "I need to find my family."

Radovid: "Here, let me give up my claim to the throne, sell my valuables, and come help you rescue those you love because you need my help, and I want to be there with you."

Yes... That's... That's what sociopaths do... And they weep over their dead guards' bodies while hiding in corners, especially when they're alone and have no one to put a show for.

That's how people start burning witches at the stake. Makes sense...

#Radovid #Jaskier #Radskier #Geraskier #My favorite romantic and queerplatonic ships on the show (respectively)#The Witcher #Good romantic interest Radovid #Deciding that what pleases him is to go help is boo rescue his found family...#And essentially wanting to become Jaskier's Jaskier on the road...#I was utterly heartbroken over poor Radovid being suddenly crowned King...#But I'm hoping that if there's one good thing that comes out of this...#It's that Jaskier will have enough ammunition to be COMPLETELY INSUFFERABLE to Valdo Marx next time they meet...#I'm the Redanian's Court only official travelling bard...#Yes the King of Redania has regularly been practicing his playing technique on both my instruments #If you catch my drift #He's already a virtuoso with one of them #And if you've ever heard him play the lute you know which one #He created the new “Royal Travelling Bard” title just for me #To help connect the Redanian Court to the rest of the Continent and share the King's love for his people with them #Including men women elves dwarves polymorphous...#My Posts #My Thoughts #Sapioromantic Jaskier #Panromantic Jaskier #Pansexual Jaskier #Pan Jaskier #Personal

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m00ngbin · 6 months ago

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mp100 for the ask game?

I did answer mp100 already BUUUUUT I can tell you my second faves bc I love talking about mob psycho and I will never shut up about it if I have the chance

My 2nd fav female character: MEZATO. I'm a mezato guy until I die, I adore her to death. Wdym this girl basically wriggled her way into a position of leadership in a cult just because she was bored? She's so smart AND she gets herself into really dangerous positions all the time because she either doesn't think or is so passionate about what she's doing (in the moment) that it doesn't matter to her (thinking specifically about when she tries investigating LOL and doesn't realize the position she's in and how dangerous it could be until they're right about to force the hood over her head.) She means a lot to me and she's awesome and I'm so upset we don't get more of her. 3rd is Tsubomi

My 2nd favorite male character: Uhhh I might as well just say Serizawa and my reason bc I guess it's not THAT tmi. He's not actually my 2nd favorite, he's my other favorite, but I didn't talk about him before. His whole entire character growth and arc of finally being able to come out of his room, go straight into being with people who did not care about him and just wanted to use him, but eventually being able to move on and join society again and learn to manage his anxiety and be more confident and just LIVE is so important to me on a level that I genuinely cannot explain to you. The message that it is NEVER too late to start and live your life and become a real, productive member of society despite everything has meant everything to me since his first appearance. I wish I could like grip him by the shoulders and give him the most sincere, emotional Thank You I've ever given anyone. Also ocd serizawa is real to me and nobody gets it like I do. My ACTUAL 2nd favorite is one of the kageyamas. They're tied

My 2nd fav season + episode: my 2nd favorite season is season 3 and my 2nd favorite episode is either Poor Lonely Whitey or the main big cleanup arc episode

My 2nd favorite cast member: unfortunately I still have not seen the stage play, but my 2nd fav va was emi's. Just because.

My 2nd fav ship: Maybe ritshou? Queer platonically? Studying them. ALSO EVERYONE GETS THEM SO WRONG THEY DONT UNDERSTAND THEM

The 2nd character I'd die defending: still would be easier to tell you who I would NOT die defending, I would defend most of the people in the series with my life

2nd character I just can't sympathize with: so I can Understand why he did it, and I do feel bad everything that happened to him before he trapped mob in the torture maze, but after it. I can't sympathize with Mogami Afterwards. He got his ass exactly where he ended up. ALSO HE COULDA LEFT AT ANY TIME COULDNT HE? Maybe he liked hanging out with matsuo

2nd character I grew to love: Not LOVE per se, but not hate. I learned to not hate minori MONTHS after I watched the mogami arc for the first time, and I know why but also like. She is a middle schooler. Middle schoolers are shitty and she eventually became a better person and she didn't Technically do anything to Mob. It was mogami

My 2nd anti otp: I don't hate any ships other than the obvious, but the other one I like the least (NOT DISLIKE AT ALL) is emimob. Only because I feel like that goes against the point of the episode, but I could be wrong and I CAN be convinced that they're awesome. Because they probably are and I'm just not seeing it

Edit: idk why I didn't put like tsubomob, I like emimob enough

#i keep forgetting about koyama but i want to mention koyama. i like him too hes cool #asks #THANK YOU FOR THE ASK :]]

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ariel-seagull-wings · 4 years ago

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TOP 12 SNOW WHITE PORTRAYALS

@princesssarisa @superkingofpriderock @sunlit-music @mademoiselle-princesse @amalthea9 @theancientvaleofsoulmaking @astrangechoiceoffavourites

Lips red as blood. Skin white as snow. Hair black as ebony. The fairest woman of all.

Snow White is one of the most iconic fairy tale characters ever created. And also one of the hardest to portray. This happens because, the story is less about her as a person, and more about following her exploration of the world and how this world reacts to her. The tale calls her a princess, but really she is more meant to be a common everygirl for a variety of readers and audiences to see themselves in. So the greatest challenge to portray the character becomes how to make at the same time universally relatable, and an individual character, and today, i’d like to share my favorite portrayals, that camed closer in acomplishing this goal.

12º Laura Berlin in Sechs Auf Einen Streich (2009)

Berlin’s Snow White acts as an outgoing, playfull young lady who deep down is trying to deal with the longing for her dead mother. And then, her father marries a new, vain and cruel woman, and sayed woman orders that the portrait of the previous queen be trown out, wich obviously makes the princess verbally snap against her father weak-willed and her tyranical stepmother. And then her father has a stroke and her stepmother orders her death. Here is a young lady in an emotinal turmoil and distress, wich makes her very relatable to audiences.

11º Nicola Stapleton and Sarah Paterson in Canon Movie Tales: Snow White (1987)

One of the first times that we see the fair princess explicitly growing up from child to young adult. Nicola Stapleton is probably more charismatic as child! Snow White, having more time on scene where she gets to sing with her father, explore the room where her stepmother keeps the magic mirror, until finally having to run trough the woods and meeting the dwarfs, but Sarah Paterson also makes adult! Snow White likable, singing about her desire to someday leave the dwarfs house because she is growing and may need her own space, and showing the doubt between fear and curiosity in her interactions with her disguised stepmother. This highlights more the themes of coming of age and confronting ones fears from the tale.

10º Yuri Amano/Donatella Fanfani/Eileen Stevens in The Legend of Snow White (1994)

In this italian-japanese coproduced anime, the twelve year old Snow White is an inquisitive, merry and kind girl, that has to adapt to a more scary reality when she has to run away from the castle to not be killed. At the dwarfs house, where she is so hungry and tired she takes all bread from a basket and sleeps for hours, she decides to give her hazelnuts and try to do shores to compensate for entering the house and eating the bread. Unfortunally, being a princess who lived in comfort all her life, she fails hard when she tries to do domestic shores, burning bread and cutting lettuce that she tought were garden plagues. But she is so sweet and kind, that it doesn’t matter. Conquering the affection of people for who she is, and not for what she can do in exchange, is the greatest strenght of this encarnation.

09º Elizabeth McGovern in Faerie Tale Theatre (1984)

A lonely girl who just wants some atention and love. Those are the characteristics that McGovern’s Snow White extablishes for herself in her first appearance, trying to impress her stepmother with juggling tricks learned with the Court Jester. Later, in the forest, when she is about to be stabbed, she prays to God for the soul of the Huntsman who is about to kill her, and to her surprise this act of kindness is what changes the Huntsman’s heart and convinces him to spare her life. In the woods she finds the dwarfs cottage, and can finally have friends to talk about things like her nostalgia for swiming in the castle moat/pit. She won’t feel alone again.

08º Kristin Kreuk in Snow White: The Fairest of them All (2001)

In this Hallmark TV Movie, Kreuk gives a 16 year old Snow White who searches friendship in garden gnomes. In a way, she expands the theme of loneliness explored by McGovern, and goes deeper about it, relating sayed loneliness with beauty: she is an awkward and melancholic person, who feels that people only care with her pretty appearance, but don’t actually come close to truly meet her as a person. In a lesser hand, this idea of a person who thinks being considered beautifull is hard could sound absurd and over dramatic, but the screenwriters and Kreuk’s sincere performance make it a compelling dilema.

07º Natalie Minko in Schneewitchen (1992)

An energetic fifteen year old, who likes to run around to play with the Court Jester, and mess up the kitchen while doing pancakes that glue in the ceiling. Minko’s Snow White is one of the few Snow White’s who is allowed to act as a normal teenager: she makes messes, she sometimes verbally fights with people, she constantly questions the adults around her, all the wille still being a genuinelly kind hearted person pursuing the path of truth.

06º Tamara Rojo in Emilio Aragon’s Blancanieves (2005)

I loved watching the DVD of this ballet production over and over as a kid. Trough dance movements, Tamara Rojo gives us a gracious and fun princess. Whetever she goes, a party will always start.

05º Adriana Caselotti in Disney’s Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs (1937)

My first portrayal of Snow White. The Disney version was raised working as a palace scullery maid, wich her stepmother hoped would make her ugly. But that didn’t work. She grows beautifull in body and soul: her singing voice is so sweet it is enough to make a dashing Prince fall in love with her, the animals are always engaged by her joyfull and sassy conversations, and she has a firm way of talking that assures a position of leadership among both the animals and the dwarfs who later befriend her. Really, she is awesome. What can i say about her that hasn’t been sayed already?

04º Marguerite Clark in Snow White (1916)

The version that inspired Walt Disney to make his version. Based on a 1912 stage play, this is the version that extablished being raised as a palace scullery maid as the reason Snow White is good with domestic tasks despite being a rich princess. Clark’s Snow White is also compassionate, sweet, romantic and dreamy, and she mix those qualities with some energy and spunkiness, being an almost wild girl.

03º Carol Heiss in Snow White and The Three Stooges (1961)

The sass, spunkiness and sweet romanticism are back, but with a new adition: an athletic hobby. Carol Heiss was originally a golden medal winner olimpic ice skater, and this movie was made to capitalize in her popularity at the time (along with reviving the Three Stooges popularity). So, we extablish in this version that the heroine who is linked to the snow loves the winter, and one of the most popular sports in this season. No other version before or after that did this, even tough its the most obvious and most awesome thing to do with the character. Ad to that the (uncredited) singing voice dubbed by Norma Zimmer, and you have one of the most complete portrayals of Snow White: she is beauty, she is grace, she can sing, she can cook and she can ice skate. She is the most interesting woman that ever lived.

02º Sakiko Tamagawa/Julie Maddalena in Grimm’s Fairy Tale Classics (1989)

Orphaned from her mother at birth and having a father who is always too busy rulling the kingdom to pay attention to her, this version of Snow White grows up raised by a nurse named Doris, and playing on the garden with a young boy named Klaus. Her favorite pass time is to climb trees to pick apples, her favorite fruit. But one day her stepmother, who for years has been ignoring her, calls the princess to her chamber, and asks if she thinks herself to be most beautifull than the Queen. Annoyed with the absurd of the question, Snow White calls her stepmother out in her vanity. What follows is her running away, having to survive as a fugitive. Getting lost from her Klaus and stumbling in a root, she crawls for her life, until being saved by the seven dwarfs and their wolf friends. Time passes, and she finds a bit of fullfilment while slowly learning to do domestic chores to help the dwarfs, and finding friendship in the wolfs and a giant black bear. But she still craves to reunite with her friend Klaus and to find some love, while the Queen’s menace lures in the air.

And now the moment everyone was expecting... My number one favorite portrayal of Snow White is:

01º Camryn Manhein in The 10th Kingdom (2000)

I know what are you thinking: “Wait, a two episode cameo in a tv minisseries, instead of a protagonist, this is your favorite”? Yes. Yes, she is. In the Hallmark minisseries The 10th Kingdom, a young lady from the real world comes to the magical world to help to disenchant a Prince that has been turned into a dog. This dog prince is Snow White’s grandson. And then the heroes arrive at the Dragon Mountain in the 09th Kingdom, and Virginia has a conversation with the spirit of the late Snow White for counsel. And Snow White counsels Virginia by simply telling her story of once being an afrayed, lonely lost girl in the woods, finding new friends in the dwarfs, suffering three murder attempts from her stepmother, being aesleep for years with the poisoned apple in her troat, until the Prince’s servants stumbled with her casket so she could trow away the apple piece, so she could finally live happily ever after. While she narrates the tale, she says that she knew the danger presented by the ribbons, the comb and the apple, but she also knew that she could hide in the dwarfs cottage, afrayed to be hurt, forever. And her husband was a good man, but she saved herself from death. With that dialogue, Manheim’s sensitive and wise Snow White ressignified the fairy tale for me, making me appreciate better the story and her character. And that is why she my number one portrayal of the fairest princess of all.

HONORABLE MENTIONS: Elke Arendt in Schneewitchen (1955), Maresa Hörbiger in Schneewitchen (1971) and Elaine Bilstad as White Snow in Happily Ever After: Fairy Tales for Every Child (1995).

#snow white #schneewittchen #snow white and the seven dwarfs #brothers grimm #fairy tales #fairy tale #folklore #mithology #literature #genre fiction #pop culture

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nutty1005 · 4 years ago

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Multitudes of Art from Wenhui Daily

Original article: Print Media by Wenhui Daily (1) http://whb.cn/zhuzhan/xinwen/20210815/415430.html and (2) http://whb.cn/zhuzhan/xinwen/20210815/415432.html

Xiao Zhan Performs in “A Dream Like A Dream”, What Traffic has Injected into Theater

Original author: 帕帕拉佐

Preface

Whether the traffic celebrity is capable is a problem, it is also another problem when there is no traffic celebrity in the theater scene. This time, because of Xiao Zhan, another group of people who are unrelated to theater started going into it. Perhaps after the indescribable wonderful 8 hour experience, some of them would truly fall in love with theater, some may continue to fork out money for her idol’s next scheduled event. But is it really that important to separate the “I’m in the same room with him for 8 hours” crowd from the theater audiences?

Theater, which used to be a niche form of art, had been breaking through its circle these two years, and causing a lot of discussions. The most recent would be “Top Traffic Celebrity” Xiao Zhan’s participation in “A Dream Like A Dream”.

In between the midst of filming a period fantasy drama “The Longest Promise”, Xiao Zhan performed as Patient No. 5, a role which Hu Ge had once performed. After the performances in the 3 stops Wuhan, Qingdao and Chengdu, at every play’s curtain call, the theater would be filled with endless applause, there was even once even covered with rousing ovation. In the cheers of nearly a thousand people, the voices of young ladies were particularly distinct.

Actually, this is not the first time Xiao Zhan’s participation in “A Dream Like A Dream” created a revelry in his fans. Early this year in March, once the official announcement that Xiao Zhan would participate in the Tour of 9 Cities, it went onto hot search immediately, and until now, Xiao Zhan’s participation in “A Dream Like A Dream” has accumulated a staggering 4.2 billion views.

Over thousand tickets were sold out in seconds, an 80 RMB ticket was scalped to over a 1,000 RMB, the tickets of the “lotus pond seats” were scalped to more than 20,000 RMB. Although Chris Li and Hu Ge both performed in this play in 2013, but since it birth 9 years ago, this magnitude of furor only happened this year.

In the midst of anticipation and suspicion, Xiao Zhan finally walked on stage. The trials of theater revealed the sincerity in him and this sincerity is Xiao Zhan’s base color, or it could even be said to be the reason he is surrounded by so much love.

This innate sincerity is a scarcity in a stage created by glorious vocals and technical construction. Many experienced actors with strong foundations would be working hard for this, but they never had it.

No one could deny that Xiao Zhan created a unique Patient No. 5, who threaded the whole play as a core character. For the actor to be a good Patient No. 5, he would need precise acting, thorough understanding of the role, firm control of emotions, and of course the blending of both the actor’s self and the character.

That year, the tranquility that Hu Ge had after coming back from his tribulations became his key to unlocking Patient No. 5; whereas for Xiao Zhan, who had went through the growth from an “idol” to a “top traffic celebrity”, who had a “unique” experience in cyberspace, the things that happened to him these few years, became his natural advantage in portraying Patient No. 5.

Last year, Yanghua held “Cao Yu’s Special 110 Year Old Commemoration Event”. Then, Xiao Zhan was still in the eye of the storm, and he had a conversation with Cao Yu’s daughter, Wan Fang, and in this conversation, Xiao Zhan did a tremendous amount of homework, and wrote down a few dozen questions regarding Wan Fang’s script “Winter Journey” and “You and I”, his questions were simple but impressionable, it gave people the feeling that he seemed to have reached the edge of theater.

In this conversation, he dazzled Wang Keran, the producer of “A Dream Like A Dream”. He seemed to have found the common point between Xiao Zhan and Patient No. 5: the impermanence nature of fate.

And once again, it proves that instincts were very useful. The intersection between the actor and the role’s life would become the crux to whether the actor is able to infuse a soul to his character. The reason he was able to establish his character was not entirely from his ability to craft roles, but more of the source came from what happened to him. In addition, Xiao Zhan’s intelligence and hard work left a deep impression on Wang Keran during the initial stages of rehearsal – while many actors had not memorized his lines, Xiao Zhan had already memorized all of his lines, and this is especially difficult given that “A Dream Like A Dream” was an 8 hour long performance and there are about 3 to 4 times more lines than a standard play.

Whether the traffic celebrity is capable is a problem, it is also another problem when there is no traffic celebrity in the theater scene. As the theater market becomes more mature operationally, more traffic celebrities would cross over to this foreign scene. At the same time, there would be controversy as well. Can the boundaries between theater and general public be broken through by “traffic celebrities”? When will theater become a “reality TV theater”? Would the audiences be looking at celebrities instead of the play? These kinds of debates had always existed. At this, Lai Shengchuan did not care too much about it. He spoke of an incident in the past, when “A Dream Like A Dream” invited Chris Li to perform, her fans did not simply watch a show, but they watched 10. During the intermission, Lai Shengchuan spoke with her fans, and he realized that hey had been watching for 5 days straight, saying “the play was awesome”.

To him, despite the difference between how traffic celebrities shine on stage and how theater is like, or perhaps foreign to then, he just has to look at how they work to know that it took a lot of talent and hard work to come this far! “Hence, don’t be too particular about whether traffic celebrities are suitable for theater.”

No matter how loud the controversy is, it is fact that theater trains people – a performance of a few hours, there is no pause, no post production, there is only one take with no chance of a retake. Hence, there has always been a hierarchy in the artistic circle, theater actors would be above movie actors, movie actors would be above TV drama actors. No matter what the actual reasons for celebrities to join theater are, Lai Shengchuan’s story proved a point, when a top traffic celebrity joins theater, an art form with high entry requirements, it would inject more vibrancy and attention to this art.

This time, because of Xiao Zhan, another group of people who are unrelated to theater started going into it. Perhaps after the indescribable wonderful 8 hour experience, some of them would truly fall in love with theater, some may continue to fork out money for her idol’s next scheduled event. But is it really that important to separate the “I’m in the same room with him for 8 hours” crowd from the theater audiences?

Let us not think too much about it, and watch the show first!

Xiao Zhan, This “Newcomer” to Theater

Original author: 贾行��

Preface

9 years ago, Yanghua Theater placed a huge bet on “A Dream Like A Dream”, it came from Wang Keran’s observations based on the changing times – China’s industrialization and urbanization created its first “middle-class” life, and for the first time the first generation who had completed education but yet who are also stuck in the “modern conundrum” – who am I, where did I come from, where do I go from here? The old answers were no longer effective. This generation’s problem was – how to face the coming of death, and how to face the loneliness that came with the inevitable death? In the hands of Yanghua, this question became – how do you use a touching story, outside of religion or philosophy, to give its audience the love of life and a sense of comfort?

As such, there exists such a different theater group, with a producer with very “un-modern” methods: front stage and backstage, regardless of matters, as long as it could not be clearly defined to a job, it belongs to Wang Keran only. He called himself an “artist + businessman”, the nature of a businessman was to be in-charge of investments, ensure profitability, so he had to consider from the business angle – whether this play could fulfill the extreme and common spiritual requirements of the current generation, while at the same time be able to continue running for a long time; he also had to consider from the artistic angle, taking risks while ensuring profitability, and create the play from his heart. The purity of drama is as such, those who are passionate about it would stake their lives for it.

The author of “A Dream Like A Dream”, playwright Lai Shengchuan had a performance principle technique called “guide the cause, not the effect”, which meant that when the director explains the scene, he does not explain the effect he wants, but instead he would explain the reasons behind this scene clearly, that is, the character’s experience and emotional state, so as to allow the actor to create a natural performance after understanding. This was very different from the rush that is in TV dramas, which would often film out of sequence, the actors might not be clear about what he is acting as, and they could only use exaggerated actions to cover their loss of direction. Worst still, there are also actors who could only count 1, 2, 3, 4 to the camera in place of lines.

However, there are also good directors who do not like to film according to logic, and film as they wanted, while the actors did not know what they were portraying, but yet they could still create a masterpiece, Xu Haofeng’s movie review on Li An’s “Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon” spoke about this – Li An felt that Chow Yun-fat’s eyes were too sharp and alert, so he kept shouting “CUT” repeatedly, until Chow Yun-fat lost confidence and his gaze became scattered, so as to get the scene he wanted. Why did he not explain the “cause” at this point? Perhaps it was hard to explain, it was like a fisherman, he had to fish for the right gaze, to wait for the right sequence.

What we said above was to explain two simple things.

The first thing: Art can be, or even must be, done in an autocratic manner, it has to set its goal based on its audience, but how the play will be like, only one person will know, and in that creative space, there is only his method.

The other thing: The status created by an actor for the role is actually very brittle, they usually only know the outcome but they rarely know the cause. The difficult part in rehearsing “A Dream Like A Dream” came from these 31 actors who had to take on more than 100 characters, besides autocracy, there was a need to protect them from interruption and confusion. Xiao Zhan, who joined in this new version, he only had Patient No. 5 on the door of his dressing room, the other roles and burden were removed.

When we were discussing Xiao Zhan, we actually saw many versions of Xiao Zhan. Going back to basics, he is a young actor and singer. I found similarities between him and Patient No. 5: They both had the same unsettling impermanence in their fate, there were things that were not caused by them, they were merely caught in between – when you take a step back, impermanence is neither good nor bad. The problem is, which Xiao Zhan is the one standing on the stage of “A Dream Like A Dream”? If we took him as actor Xiao Zhan, then there is nothing wrong with it.

As an audience, my judging criteria is very simple: How did this new theater actor Xiao Zhan do? Based on his age and experience, Patient No. 5 is an extremely complex and hard to control character, and after 3 stops of Yanghua’s tour, the audience would probably have felt: Xiao Zhan created a brand new, intricate Patient No. 5, this character was well established onstage, this meant that his understanding and analysis was also well established.

I also prepared an observer angle, that was to see if he could blend into the strict system of theater, would be he outshone by actors who had a lot more energy, foundation and experience. The result exceeded my expectations, he not only did it, he displayed clear precision in his pace and control, and realized a complete theater experience.

I do not see the problem with Xiao Zhan’s decision to perform, just like I do not see how anyone would be damaged by this incident. If it had a specific “influence” (I do not see how that is, it is just the decision by a theater group), then to me, the influence is – it allowed more audiences to walk into theaters, and let more platforms notice theater. Chinese theater really needed more exploration in terms of content and operation. As for what influence this would have on the theater scene, audiences are very simple, as long as it was a good show onstage, they would buy tickets to watch it. As an outsider, I would also want to exclaim another statement: there were those who always said they wanted to revive the theater, but when someone really worked hard at doing it, these people would always come with their senseless controversies.

From my point of view, after I met Xiao Zhan’s “A Dream Like A Dream”, I felt that my soul had been cleansed by the waters in the lotus pond, been carefully cleaned by the fluttering spotlights and shadows akin to a bright moon, I seemed to have understood many things, there were less confusion, more courage, and a lot of gratitude to lives of those from front stage and backstage of the theater.

According to Sigmund Freud’s theory, play is a child’s unique way of gaining experience in handling matters, the function of play is to vent, venting is the purification of emotions, this is slightly different from those who take themselves as the audiences’ guide to purification. Theater has created a space to help the audience to vent what is in their hearts. After becoming an adult, it seemed like besides dreaming, there are not many methods to self-purify; besides dreaming, we could also watch “A Dream Like A Dream”.

#xiao zhan #xiaozhan #sean xiao #肖战

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i-watch-too-many-movies · 4 years ago

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5 Favorite First Viewings of July 2021

Quick note: Hi everyone, I'm back, things have honestly been getting better for me, and I'm glad to be on this site full of cinephiles, people that are too horny, and cinephiles that are too horny. I'll be more active on here. But anyway, let's talk about some movies.

Beyond the Valley of the Dolls (1970) (dir. Russ Meyer)

CW: Abortion mention

What a picture. What a gorgeous, sexy, horrifying slice of what Hollywood and star life can do to a bunch of bright-eyed young people looking for success. Also is a critique of how macho nature can ruin friendships and romantic relationships with total ease. I was obsessed with the scene transitions, like Pet pouring pancake mix onto a plate after the abortion scene, or Kelly singing after someone screams before their murder in the opening scene.

Great, campy flick with exceptional music too.

Deep Cover (1992) (dir. Bill Duke)

Laurence Fishburne plays Russell Stevens, a Cincinnati police officer who hopes to do well by the community, to make a difference. He’s traumatized by the death of his substance-abusing father, and wants to make sure that he can help the people of his own town. He goes undercover on assignment as a drug dealer, where his boss orders him to take down the kingpin. Stevens realizes the police’s own failings while on assignment. The racist abuse he takes from Agent Carver, and the realization that the police department is protecting drug kingpins like Gallegos and Barbossa. Giving drugs to Black kids and Latinx kids so there will be less of them. The cops are no different than the drug kingpins looking to make filthy amounts of money.

Fishburne’s performance is excellent, as Stevens feels he has to maintain a stone face so he doesn’t get caught by Jason or Barbossa or any of his cronies, but also he maintains a stone face to try and hide his emotion, his trauma. But when he gets pissed, Fishburne acts it beautifully, as is when he has to deliver a funny quip to counter Jason’s douchebaggery. And the production design, holy fuck, the sets and the lighting.

A perfect neo-noir for the HW Bush years, arguably one of the most timeless commentaries on the era, as well as the police as a whole.

Fast Five (2011) (dir. Justin Lin)

I was torn between including this or Furious 7, but I ultimately went with Fast Five because it felt like an important turning point in the series, it's a great heist film, and it reached the same chaotic highs and genuinely excellent filmmaking that I had been waiting for since 2 Fast and Tokyo Drift.

Fast Five opens where Fast & 4ious left off. Dom is hauled away to prison on a bus. Mia and Brian drive in their high-tech cars and knock the bus over, helping Dom escape. The title drops. Fast Five. It’s such an intense yet short action scene, and dropping the title immediately after it lets the viewer know that this movie is not fucking around. It’s arguably gonna be more intense and insane than the previous one.

And it is. The filmmakers made the decision to use a lot more practical stunt work for the film, and as a result, it leads to, so far, the best action in the entire series, since 2 Fast and Tokyo Drift. It’s not just how it’s shot or edited, it’s the geography of the locations, the rooftop chase echoes the rooftop chase of Jackie Chan’s masterwork Police Story, particularly the way each character bounces from top to top.

And of course, there’s the silliest moment in the movie, the one that matches the intensity and kineticism of a film like 2 Fast, which is driving the Reyes’ bank vault throughout the street, getting chased by corrupt cops.

I know we make fun of Vin Diesel for saying “family” all the time in these films, but there’s a reason we remember him saying all of these impassioned monologues. Because he’s unbelievably sincere, and has so much love in his heart for every single person in the room. Anytime he delivers a speech to any of them, it’s genuinely heartwarming.

This is the film that finally shows La Familia in their best environment, which is working together, in a movie genre that allows them to work together, which is a heist film. And a great one at that.

Last Days (2005) (dir. Gus Van Sant)

CW: Mention of suicide

Several films have been made about legendary rock artist Kurt Cobain, and for good reason. He is one of the most tragic figures in rock and roll. A tortured genius who has written and performed classic song after classic song with his band Nirvana. He was called the voice of a generation, and helped change the face of mainstream alternative rock music as we know it. But with that fame, and all of those expectations came a worsening depression and further drug abuse, and his eventual death. But most of the films about Kurt Cobain ask one question which gets under my skin way too much:

“Who REEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLY killed Kurt Cobain?”

It was him. He did. And it’s okay, I’m sad too. Thinking that Kurt Cobain was murdered is completely ignoring the depression that he faced. And despite Last Days being more inspired by the death of Cobain rather than actually about it, it feels much more honest than the conspiracy documentaries on his death, wanting to leech off of his dead body.

This is the last installment of Gus Van Sant’s “Death Trilogy”, the previous two installments being Gerry (2001), and Elephant (2003). While I have not seen Gerry, I have seen Elephant though, and love that film for its minimalist, raw nature, and its boldness for not romanticizing the school shooter or the lives they had taken. Last Days falls into that trap once, as I don’t agree with the shot of Blake’s soul climbing up a ladder, that always struck me as cheesy in a film that is anything but.

Last Days is similar to Elephant in terms of the way it is filmed. Its usage of long takes, and still shots of characters doing various things, such as Blake playing his guitar behind a drum set. The way these moments are shot is similar to a Chantal Akerman film, particularly Jeanne Dielman. Where the acts of the mundane are the stars of the film. Blake wanders around an empty house, and the viewer can feel the pain, not just through Michael Pitt’s acting, but from the house itself. Its decay, its paint peeling from the walls, from the soft glow of the lamp that lights his face.

I say this is the most honest film about Kurt Cobain, because, despite the characters technically being fictional (the main character who looks, walks, and acts like Cobain is named Blake), this film focuses on the mental state of a person before they eventually take their own life. They’re still working, still making music, still trying to talk to friends and bandmates, but the depression lingers on. Not once does this film try to make you believe that someone else killed him, because you can see the signs of his own suicide taking place just through the film’s excellent cinematography by Harris Savides, showing his mental state only growing worse through the production design.

And it’s empathetic with him. There’s no judgement for leaving rehab, there’s no finger-wagging at him or the people he was with, there’s just a silent prayer at the end of the film, hoping that he is in a better place than he was.

Sometimes you don’t need to show every event that led you to where you are, all you can show is the moment, which also makes this better than most biopics as well, as it never feels messy or muddled, just showing one moment of Blake/Kurt’s life.

I really loved this film, and I’ll be writing about it in full soon.

The Village (2004) (dir. M. Night Shyamalan)

The Cracked.com/Channel Awesome audience stuck in 2012 will tell you that this was the beginning of the end for Shyamalan. That this was when people stopped taking him seriously, that this was when he became more of a punchline because of his twist endings.

But why?

The Village was released in 2004, deep in the Bush administration, during the early stages of the Iraq War. The leaders of the time were talking about imaginary boogeymen, terrorists that would attack the civilians if they could. Because of 9/11, politicians could get away with these false ideas with the majority of Americans fully believing them. The boogeymen in The Village are “The People We Don’t Speak Of”, monsters attracted by the color red. Yet we find out that they are all costumes made by the Elders of the land, designed to prevent people from going outside the land. They rule by fear disguised as love. They’ve gone through their own traumas through the deaths of their family members, but they’ve decided to completely abandon the lives that they’ve had and have their children living lies.

9/11 impacted American life by teaching citizens to live primarily by fear, to not trust anyone but their own people. And yet, post-9/11, all that increased was not “coming together”, but hate crimes against South Asian people. The rage white Americans had felt led to conservative politicians pushing fear-mongering agendas, and said white Americans blindly accepted. The outside world was progressing, but too many people were fine with living with further conservative politics only regressing American life further and further back, all for the illusion of safety. Meanwhile, the only threats to them were not the brown citizens outside of America they were so afraid of, but the white elders, the white politicians.

The Village explores these fears so eloquently, all while having a terrifying atmosphere, an enchanting score, and brilliant sound design. I enjoyed this movie very much.

Other viewings I enjoyed:

Beavis and Butt-Head Do America (1996) (dir. Mike Judge) (re-watch)

Blow Out (1981) (dir. Brian de Palma) (re-watch)

Clueless (1995) (dir. Amy Heckerling) (re-watch)

Furious 7 (2015) (dir. James Wan)

The Long Goodbye (1973) (dir. Robert Altman)

Lupin III: The First (2019) (dir. Takashi Yamazaki)

Unbreakable (2000) (dir. M. Night Shyamalan) (re-watch)

Velvet Goldmine (1998) (dir. Todd Haynes)

The Visit (2015) (dir. M. Night Shyamalan)

#favorite first watches #these movies are (chef's kiss)#beyond the valley of the dolls #russ meyer #deep cover #bill duke #fast five #justin lin #last days #gus van sant #the village #m night shyamalan

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bluerosesburnblue · 4 years ago

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Can I complain about the use of Laurium and Elrena in KH3/KHUX being blatant "these are good people, we swear, and we shall prove it by making them keyblade wielders long ago" and just... ignoring the whole bit on how they went on to torture Sora, Namine, Repliku, and many others? And how the two personalities are vastly different? Also as they don't remember any of this KHUX stuff AT ALL then it doesn't forgive/excuse anything they did in the present day? I feel like that bit in KH3 was thrown in for shock value. And like, I love Larxene. She's awesome and evil. But characters have been brought back who's story was over, other characters who's story was long over were brought back only to die for no reason (cough) Repliku denying he was a person was horrible (cough) and KHUX being the most "listen to my tone and not my words" that KH has done in quite some time. (And thank you 30 Rock for giving me that wonderful way of explaining it) Just ugh.

God, just... that's also what it feels like they're trying to do with Xehanort with "the reveal?" I'm not against the idea of giving a villain a sympathetic backstory, but the point of that is to give them traits that the audience will look at and see reflected in themselves and go "oh shit" and realize that they could go bad if they leave those traits unchecked. It's not supposed to be used as an excuse to gloss over all of the villainous things they did to make them a good person in hindsight. You can't buff out a game everyone's already played and known about for years

I feel like that bit in KH3 was thrown in for shock value.

Unfortunately, Lauriam and Elrena were in KHUx before KH3 came out so this whole thing was probably planned concurrently between them. Lauriam was here for a long time. There was no shock in the KH3 reveal

Thing is, Lauriam's descent into Marluxia is actually passable? There's a somewhat believable progression of "slightly conceited but still loving older brother" to "little sister goes missing, panic" to "find out little sister was as far as anyone can tell killed, start looking for revenge" to "become so obsessed with revenge that he almost kills a kid who was heavily manipulated and not actually at fault." The issue is that they tried to have him resolve that by the end of KHUx by having him realize that his acting out was wrong, leading to this weird bump where Lauriam seems to have completed a full character arc within KHUx, but for the franchise as a whole the next time we see him, he's back to the overly-aggressive-almost-killed-a-kid side. We don't get a nice, continuous progression with him, but the steps on paper kind of work?

It's just that the end of KH3 tries to backpedal him into the "realize that his acting out was wrong" stage without any of the inciting events to make that happen, so he's forced to emptily repeat the last two steps of his arc again with no motivation due to amnesia

Elrena's the one they really screwed up on by making her this, like, sweet and demure young girl (who felt bad for taking a pod!) with absolutely no lead-in to being a full-on sadistic witch. And the worst part is that they could totally have made it work and just... didn't?

It wouldn't have even been that hard. If, at the start of KHUx, we'd had flashback scenes to Strelitzia and Elrena's party where they're friends, Elrena has the KHUx personality that they actually gave her, and everyone is happy, but then relations in the party start breaking down and Elrena starts growing more and more bitter at her teammates, then you'd have something to work with. Maybe a teammate betrays them and joins a new party because they're not "earning enough Lux" or something. Elrena is only able to keep a hold on herself due to her good friend, Strelitzia, enough that she's recruited into the Dandelions (hell, maybe she's the first person that Strelitzia recruits). But then, from her perspective, her only good friend in her party goes "missing," and none of the rest of their teammates seem to care and the bitterness and anger returns full-force as she goes to look for Strelitzia by herself

Then we could have her bump into Lauriam and have her start showing signs of being her future, rude self before learning that Lauriam is also looking for Strelitzia. The two recognize each other from things Strelitzia has told them and form a partnership on their hunt for her whereabouts

If they really wanted to go dark, they could have Elrena eavesdrop on the Union Leaders (instead of just showing up to just add in the idea of Data selves existing and then snag a lifeboat) and realize that they've been suppressing people's memories and start to distrust them. Then, in the end, Lauriam would have to win her trust back enough to convince her to take a pod to try and save her (to protect his sister's dear friend), but she still ends up with the major trust issues mentioned in her character file

And then all they'd have to do is frame the KH3 scenes and accompanying deaths a little more sincerely, giving each of them a "what have I done?" moment somewhere in the middle of the story, maybe even brought on by flickers of memories of Strelitzia coming back to each of them, and then regretting things come their final boss battles. Even a "tell Namine I'm sorry" or a bitter "I've remembered someone... who would've LOVED to meet Namine... But.. I..." from one or both of them would be enough

So, not a terrible idea, even if I think making them ancient Keyblade wielders is stretching the suspension of disbelief just a bit much, but mediocre execution on Marluxia and abysmal execution on Larxene

#kingdom hearts #khux #khux spoilers #long post #anon asks #liz answers

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dickspeightjrs · 5 years ago

Text

Confessions of a Roommate in Love (college au / 3.1k words / roommates)

ao3 link

During college you’ll do anything to earn a bit of extra cash between classes.

Ash does computer shit for people (Dean has learned not to ask about how legal it all his work is). Jo works in her mom, Ellen’s, bar. Benny hustles pool in said bar (while avoiding Ellen’s wrath).

But Dean and Castiel do something a little different.

They enter trials and experiments posted around their university’s psychology and science departments. The psychology department, especially, knows them pretty well by now. It’s got to the point where they’ll just go straight to Dean and Castiel and ask if they’re interested.

So that has what led Dean to racing into their apartment one Tuesday afternoon in their final year with a look of sheer childish glee on his face.

Castiel is laying back on the sofa working on something but looks up from his laptop at the slam of the door and squints at Dean’s expression. He can never quite trust that Dean’s gleeful looks won’t end in tears eventually. But whatever Dean usually suggests Castiel will go along with because that’s what best friends do.

“They’re doing another research project in the Psych department. Charlie emailed me the details.” Dean explains.

Castiel’s interest is clearly piqued and he closes his laptop, moving to sit properly on the sofa to give Dean room to sit down next to him.

“She said there’s a few stages to it. We’ve got to enter some video submission thing first to see if we’re the right fit and then they’ll invite us in for the real thing. Pretty much like the rest of them.” Dean shrugs, taking the offered seat next to Castiel.

He pulls up the email on his phone and scrolls straight to the specific information for potential participants. They’ve done so many of these things that he tends to scroll right past most of the generic information.

Castiel’s interested gaze stays on him.

“Ah, here it is.” Dean quickly scans the text before reading it out. “So it’s a study about roommates and looks like we have to just answer a few questions about each other. Easy.” Dean grins.

“What kind of questions do we have to answer?” Castiel asks.

“Just basic ones about living together - who’s the messiest,” Dean snorts, “that’s you.”

Castiel makes an offended noise and plucks Dean’s phone out of his hand. “I think you’ll find that’s you actually. I don’t think your socks have ever made it to the laundry basket.”

Dean watches as Castiel scrolls through the rest of the questions. He lets out the occasional chuckle at some of the questions - even the tiniest of laughs lights up his face.

Eventually, Castiel hands Dean back his phone. “They’re definitely easy questions. I’ll just pack my study stuff away and we can get started on the video. It’ll be better to submit it as soon as possible.” Castiel rises to his feet and collects his laptop in his arms. He’s about to walk down the hall to his bedroom when he turns back to face Dean. “I’m glad this one is about roommates. Given the amount of times we’ve had to pretend to be a couple for these things,” he chuckles and goes to his room, not waiting for a response from Dean.

Dean’s glad Castiel has left and can’t see his face fall from a fake smile.

Castiel is right. There have been a few times when they’ve participated in research studies and posed as a couple. But what Castiel doesn’t know is that there was no faking on Dean’s part.

Truthfully, Dean is hopelessly and completely in love with Castiel.

It’s so unbelievably cliche that Dean can’t quite believe it’s actually true. But it is.

Ever since they first met, there has been something about Castiel that seems to complete Dean in ways that he never knew he needed.

Despite successfully pretending to be a couple, Dean has never told Castiel how he feels. Risking their friendship is too much. The chance that he could ruin everything between them is too big.

So he stays quiet. Living in the hope that it will blow over one day and he’ll find someone who will love him back the way he wants to be loved.

“Dean, are you listening?”

Dean blinks back to reality and sees Castiel standing in front of him. “What?”

“I asked if you wanted to use your phone or mine?” Castiel looks at him quizzically. “Unless you’re not feeling up to it right now? We can do it later.”

God bless Castiel for being concerned for Dean all the time.

“Nah, man.” Dean clears his throat and mentally shakes himself. “I’ll have the questions on my phone, so I guess we could use your phone to film it.”

Castiel nods, though he still looks a little skeptical that Dean is actually okay. “I’ll go and get my tripod for my phone.”

Dean smiles and waits for Castiel to be gone from the room before he takes a deep breath and casts any thoughts of his true feelings away. It’s not Castiel’s fault Dean feels this way, and Dean isn’t going to take it out on the guy by acting weird.

Castiel returns and effortlessly sets up the camera to record.

Having done submission videos like this before, Dean doesn’t feel self conscious about the feeling of having a camera on him anymore.

Instead, he looks over the email again.

Castiel drops himself down on the couch next to Dean and naturally lets their knees touch. Dean keeps his eyes focused on the phone in his hand.

“So it says we have to answer these questions as quick as we can. Don’t think too much about the answers.” Dean explains.

Castiel nods in understanding.

“Right, let’s get started.” Dean says. “First question: Who makes the most noise?”

“Dean.”

“Yeah it is me.” Dean has to admit. “It’s the music. Gotta start the day with listening to some classic rock.”

Castiel snorts. “Yes but you don’t only start the day with classic rock. You end with it too. And you play it when you study. And shower. And when you’re sad.”

Dean blushes a little at the thought of Castiel knowing when Dean is sad and when he listens to music to cope with it.

He clears his throat. “Okay, next question.”

* * *

It’s another couple of days before an email pings itself into Dean’s inbox telling him that he and Castiel are through to the next stage of the study.

Dean hasn’t thought about his feelings for Castiel since they filmed the video and he’s very happy to keep it that way.

He’s sat in the living room watching the new episode of Dr Sexy when Castiel comes through the door after his last class of the day. He looks tired and completely adorable.

“Hey, man. Got an email today, we’re through to the next stage. You free tomorrow afternoon?”

Castiel doesn’t reply straight away. Instead he trudges over to the couch and flops down next to Dean. The dude must really be as tired as he looks because he sighs and rests his weary head on Dean’s shoulder.

Dean resists the urge to rest his head on Castiel’s in return. “You okay there, Cas?” He asks, looking down at Castiel’s head of dark hair.

“I’ve had a long day. That last final nearly killed me. I swear to god.” Castiel groans.

As much as Dean loves Castiel, the dude can be a real drama queen when he wants to be.

“Come on, man, you’ve aced all your finals and you know it. You’re the smartest guy I know.”

Castiel abruptly lifts his head from Dean’s shoulder and looks his friend in the eyes. “Thank you, Dean,” he says, sincerity shining in his eyes. His eyes seem to flicker down to Dean’s momentarily but Dean is sure it must just have been the lights or something.

Dean swallows and coughs before he does something stupid. “Anyway, you free tomorrow then?”

Castiel clears his throat too and shifts away from Dean’s personal space a little. “Yes, I am free all day. I was just planning to sleep now that finals are over. But it’ll be nice to see what happens with Charlie’s research project.”

Dean nods. “Awesome, I’ll text Charlie and tell her we’re free.”

Text sent, Dean returns his attention to Dr Sexy, who is making out with yet another intern on screen. What Dean wouldn’t give to be one of those interns.

He almost forgets that Castiel hasn’t actually left the living room until he feels a soft weight fall onto his shoulder again. He looks to see that Castiel has fallen asleep on the couch next to him. Now Castiel’s head has slipped down and rested itself against Dean’s arm.

Any normal roommate would wake Castiel up and tell him to go to his room and get some sleep. But Dean just can’t bring himself to disturb Castiel’s peaceful slumber. Finals must have really knocked it out of him.

And if Dean gets a little joy out of having Castiel this close to him, well that’s no one else’s business but his own.

* * *

“Okay I just need you guys to sign a few documents before we get started.” Charlie explains. “I know you’ve seen most of these before with the other studies but there’s a couple new ones in there so make sure you look at them carefully. Dean.” She raises an eyebrow at him.

Dean looks up from where he’d been scanning the papers Charlie handed them when they walked into the classroom. His face is a picture of perfect innocence and offence of being accused of such things.

“Don’t pull that face, Dean. Charlie is right, you can be rather lackadaisical with important documentation.” Castiel says, his eyes never leaving the papers he’s reading.

Trust Castiel to know exactly how Dean would react without even looking at him. And lackadaisical? Who even says that? God, Castiel is such a fucking dork.

Papers thoroughly read and signed, Charlie takes Dean and Castiel into a smaller room with two stools next to each other in the middle. A pretty simple set up compared to some of the things they’ve been part of.

“Take a seat. It doesn’t matter which seat you take, just make sure you’re both facing me.” Charlie instructs.

Both boys do as asked.

“Okay, from now on neither of you can talk to the other. You can only talk to me. Understand?”

Dean and Castiel give identical nods.

“Good. This is the first stage. There is another one after and we will give you more information about that once this one is finished.” Charlie continues. “Much like your video submission, for this round you will be answering questions based on living together.”

Dean tries to concentrate on what Charlie is saying but the stools really are close together and Castiel’s knee is knocking against his own. The small spot of warmth from the other man both relaxes and makes Dean anxious at the same time. But Dean daren’t move his leg away. Castiel would wonder why he’d moved away and probably get a little pouty frown on his face. The same as he did the night before when Dean had finally got up from the couch because he needed the bathroom.

“And remember, the main rule of these questions is: what happens in this room stays in the room. Got it?”

Dean swallows and nods. He’d missed a bit of what Charlie had said but he’d probably figure it out.

“Awesome. Let’s begin.” Charlie smiles. “First question: what do you like most about living together?”

Dean knows what he’d like to answer but he’ll never confess. Instead, he goes for a more playful answer. “I like that Castiel gets free donuts from his job at the coffee shop.”

From the corner of his eye he can see Castiel roll his eyes. “I like that Dean has a brother that I can have much more intellectually stimulating conversations with,” Castiel replies with a smug face.

Dean would argue but he’s not allowed to speak directly to Castiel. (And to be honest, his brother may only be eighteen but he is freakishly clever.)

Charlie smirks and shakes her head as she writes down their answers.

“Next: What do you hate most about living together?”

This time Castiel gets his answer in first. “I hate that Dean leaves dirty socks around the apartment.”

Now Dean rolls his eyes. Castiel is always nagging Dean about his socks. They didn’t need to come all the way down here for Castiel to get that off his chest.

“I hate that you always put the empty milk carton back in the fridge. It’s gross dude.”

Castiel levels Dean with a look that says ‘you do that too and you know it’.

Dean just shrugs.

After another few questions, the first round is over and Charlie allows them to have a break. Only they’re still not allowed to talk to each other so they go into the first room and sit at either ends.

Dean is tempted to text Castiel from across the room but he knows Charlie would be hugely pissed if she found out he broke the rules.

Soon enough, they’re called back into the question room.

When they enter they’re met with the same two stools but this time there’s a solid white screen between them.

As they take their seats again, Castiel disappears behind the partition and Dean suddenly realises why it’s probably there. It’s probably an attempt to be more honest with each other because they won’t see the other’s immediate reaction.

“Okay,” Charlie begins again, “it’s the same rules as before. I’ll ask you some questions again. And remember: what happens in this room, stays in this room.”

Dean takes a deep breath. He hates being reminded of that. As if Charlie knows he’s not telling the full truth. Which, of course, he isn’t. But they don’t know that.

“First question: what has been the worst thing about living together?”

Dean internally rolls his eyes, how can he think of another bullshit jokey answer?

His thoughts are stopped by Castiel softly clearing his throat on the other side of the wall. Dean can do nothing but look at Charlie sitting opposite them. She seems to be sending Castiel a kind smile.

“The worst thing,” Castiel begins, “was that you were hurting so much when your mom died and I couldn’t do anything to help take the pain away.” The end of the sentence comes out in almost a whisper.

Dean is overwhelmed. He feels like he’s been punched in the gut. He doesn’t often talk about his mother’s death, not even with Castiel. That was one of the lowest moments of his life. But Castiel had been his rock. Cleaning up after him when he was in depressed moods, dragging him out of bars and shoving him in the shower to sober up. God, Dean would have flunked out of college by now if Castiel hadn’t saved him.

“You did just by being there, man.” Dean whispers, tears coming to his eyes. He takes a small breath and sits in the silence for a few moments. “Dammit, you promise that whatever happens in here, stays in here?” He asks Charlie.

“Well, from my point of view, yes. I will not discuss the details of your answers outside the parameters of the study, and your names will be anonymised when your data is used in the final report. However, it’s up to you two if it carries on with you outside these four walls.

Dean takes a shaky breath, letting Charlie’s answer wash over him for a moment.

“I would never judge you or be angry at you for anything, Dean.” Castiel’s kind voice rumbles through the partition.

And if that ain’t Castiel summed up perfectly, Dean thinks. Castiel is the most thoughtful and selfless person Dean has ever met. And Dean loves him.

Dean feels like he might just burst if he doesn’t finally put his feelings into physical words.

Castiel would forgive Dean of anything. It’s that thought that pushes Dean to take a final, calming deep breath and jump.

“Fuck it, you wanna know the worst thing about living with Cas?” Dean asks, rhetorically. “It’s that every day I look at him and see everything I could ever want but can never have.” Dean finally confesses. And once the floodgates are open, he finds that he just can’t stop. “It terrifies me that one day he’ll leave for someone better.”

Dean thinks he can hear a soft noise coming from Castiel’s side but he’s not done.

“And the thing I really hate the most having Cas as a roommate? It’s that my fucking heart breaks a little more every time he walks through the door because I know one day it’ll be the last.”

Dean can’t bring himself to look at Charlie so he looks down at his hands, nervously playing with them in his lap.

No sound comes from Castiel’s side and Dean closes his eyes in defeat and sheer regret. He’s ruined everything for sure. He should have known Castiel wouldn’t feel the same. He should have just kept it to himself.

As if to prove Dean right, he hears footsteps in the quiet room. Footsteps that he’d recognise anywhere.

Great, Castiel has left which means Charlie’s research is probably ruined too.

Fuck, shit. Can’t Dean get anything fucking right?

Only, when he listens more carefully, he notices the footsteps aren’t retreating. In fact, they sound like they’re coming closer and closer to Dean.

Dean finally opens his eyes and lifts his head to see Castiel standing in front of him. The overhead light is positioned perfectly behind his head and creates a ring of pure light around him.

Castiel silently lifts a hand to Dean’s chin, cupping it ever so slightly. Dean can’t help but fall for Castiel all over again, just looking into his eyes.

“I know Charlie didn’t ask it yet but would you like to know what I love most about living with you, Dean?”

Dean nods, eyes never leaving Castiel’s.

“It’s that I fall in love with you more and more every day, and I’m completely helpless to stop it.”

Dean can’t believe what he’s hearing and assumes this must all be a dream.

Dream or not, he’s not taking any chances and letting Castiel slip away.

Dean pushes himself up from his seat to meet Castiel’s lips and bring him into a kiss.

This definitely isn’t a dream, Dean thinks, he’s never felt something so intense in his life.

They finally part once Charlie awkwardly clears her throat, reminding them that she’s still there.

They still don’t turn their attention to her though. Instead, Castiel rests his head against Dean’s and whispers between them “This definitely isn’t staying in this room.”

A/N: I quite liked writing this, I hope you enjoyed reading it!

Please REBLOG if you liked it.

If you enjoy my works and would like to be added to my tags list, let me know!

TAGS: @eccentriccas @starrynightdeancas @credentiast @imbiowaresbitch @starclaire @cockleslovesdestiel @bend-me-shape-me @destielfactory @dea-stiel @wendeano @wingsandimpalas @aggressivedean @flowersforcas @chill-legilimens @pancakesofthelord @caslikescoffeeandfreckles @assbuttboyfriends @breathingdestiel @simplymisha

@thekingslover @aelysianmuse @2musiclover2 @cas-you-assbutt-dean-needs-you @50shadesofsubtext @destielle @carryoncastiel @winchester-novak @angelwithashotguun @misha-moose-dean-burger-lover @chaoticdean @jensenacklesruinedmylife @huckleberryhusbands @good-things-do-happen-dean @irlydontknoanymore @little-greek5 @joana-the-banana @findingfantazja1627 @fevercas

@mishha @casbelieves @duckyboos-blog @rambleoncas @destiel4life @bastard-man-barba @fiercedean @jackk-o-lanterns @aurastiel @castyel @joharvele

#destiel #destiel fic #dean winchester #castiel #destielfanficnet #myfic #fluff #angst #first kiss #au #collegeau #3k #friends to lovers #student!dean #student!cas #minor:charlie

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thebrotherssalvatore321 · 4 years ago

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Keeping Secrets Ch. 24

Keeping Secrets Masterlist

Dear Diary,

I thought when I got all of my memories back that I would feel different, that I would be different, like who I was in my first life and who I am in this life would somehow mesh together and create this new person. But I feel…like me, just with more knowledge. It’s weird, I thought my taste in things would change, but I like everything around me as much as I always did. I still love my friends and I still love Damon even though I’m mad at him. The one thing that has changed though, is that now I know that everything I’ve been feeling for Elijah is completely founded and rooted in truth, not magic. The spark that his touch always sent thought me wasn’t Fiona’s spell, it was what I felt before I had her cast it. Her spell just made it so that we would always be able to feel and find each other. Knowing that what I feel for Elijah is real… scares the shit out of me. I hated Damon for loving me and Katherine at the same time. Now I’m no better. It feels like my heart is a hunk of metal stuck between two high powered magnets labeled Elijah and Damon. It’s ripping me apart. I know Elijah is dead and I could just manipulate my way into the boarding house and pull that dagger from his chest, but a part of me wonders if Elijah and I would even make it in this day and age. Back then I was just a lonely housewife with a son to raise. Now I’m a vampire caught in the middle of this business with Klaus trying to kill Elena to unlock his werewolf side. I don’t know how strong my relationship with Elijah would be, but I know how strong mine and Damon’s could be if he would just stop lying to me...and if I could let go of Elijah.”

She had put down her pen and was closing the book when she heard a knock on the door. So she threw on a robe over the comfortable clothes she had put on when she got home from school and headed down stairs. When she pulled the door open the faces of her three friends came into view. Caroline held a small pink igloo cooler with a handle out to her. “I raided Damon’s stash for you.”

“You’re awesome.” Katie laughed and took the cooler from her.

“Get dressed.” Elena told her with a wrinkled nose look at the old robe she was wearing.

“We’re having a girls night at Elena’s.” Bonnie added as Katie stepped aside and let the girls inside.

“We thought about having it here, no adult supervision and all, but we assumed you wouldn’t have any real food in the house.” Elena told her as she went into the kitchen that could be seen from the living room and opened the pantry revealing a bunch of empty shelves and a few canned goods. “Just as we thought. Plus we want to catch Aunt Jenna and real her in for some cheering up.”

Katie scratched the back of her head and frowned. “No.” Caroline told her with her finger pointed at Katie. “Don’t try to back out of this. You have been mopey all week because of Damon and Elijah and we are not going to sit back and watch you spiral.”

Katie deadpanned at her. “I’m not spiraling.”

“Really?” Bonnie asked. “It’s three in the afternoon and you’re wearing pajamas.”

“Go… get dressed.” Caroline barked and pointed to the stairs. Katie rolled her eyes but obeyed. “And put on some make up!” she shook her head.

“Remind me why I let you boss me around all the time?” Katie asked from upstairs.

“Because if I didn’t you would be a hopeless mess.” Caroline answered then Katie heard Elena ask who she was talking to.

“Thanks for the pep talk.” Katie mumbled clearly not thankful.

“Hey, you asked, I answered.” Caroline replied, making Katie laugh.

TVDTVDTVD

“So are you ever going to talk about it?” Caroline asked Katie as they stood in Elena’s kitchen pouring chips into bowls.

“About what?” Katie asked playing stupid.

“The fact that you’re in love with two guys, one of which is a very old original vampire.” Caroline said with a smirk, not looking at Katie.

“I have talked about it and I’m over it.” Katie answered as she wadded up the chip bag and put it in the trash can.

“You’re over it?” Caroline asked with a confused shake of her head. “You don’t just get over something like that Katie.”

“Can we please just…not talk about Elijah? He’s dead, for all intents and purposes, and that chapter of my life is over.” Katie answered, getting aggravated with her friend.

“So what about Damon, are you still mad at him?” Caroline asked, still prying.

Katie let out a stressed sigh and placed her hands on the counter top. “Because I know you won’t stop prying until you get some kind of answer I will tell you that I don’t know. I haven’t spoken to him since that disaster of a dinner party.”

“Don’t you think you owe it to him to hear him out?” Caroline asked, making Katie frown because she was right. Thankfully Elena and Bonnie walked into the kitchen saving Katie from the conversation. “So, Chinese food or pizza?” Caroline asked.

“Like you have to ask.” Elena answered as she grabbed one of the bowls of chips.

“I will look it up.” Caroline said as she grabbed her tablet and started to search for the nearest pizza place, but she stopped when she saw the picture of her and Matt from founder’s day that was her background picture.

“I’ll do it.” Bonnie stepped in and gingerly took the tablet from Caroline.

“Do you believe that Jonas is being sincere?” Elena asked Bonnie as she set some cups out on the counter.

“I don’t know what to believe. I think he’s at a loss…not sure who to trust.” Bonnie answered.

“Join the club.” Elena sighed and Katie nodded.

“Well what are we going to do about this movie situation?” Caroline asked to change the subject. “What about the notebook?”

“Caroline, how many times have you seen that movie?” Elena asked, making the other girls laugh.

“That is so not the point.” Caroline argued.

“Well, yeah I mean…” Elena trailed off when Aunt Jenna walked into the room. “Hey…” she drew out the word awkwardly.

“What’s going on?” Jenna asked as she set down the coat that she’d had over her arm.

“Girls night.” Elena answered as she sat down in one of the bar stools.

“More like a pity party. We’ve all pretty much had a crap week.” Katie elaborated.

“You’ve all heard about my fight with Rick.” Jenna observed.

“He feels terrible.” Elena told her.

“Is this some sort of disguised attempt to cheer me up?” Jenna asked.

“No,” Elena answered, “this is about us girls hanging out and you know…we’ll be here if you happen to want to talk or…”

“Because I am a winner at successful relationships.” Caroline chipped in. Jenna and Caroline started talking about whether or not Alaric should tell Jenna about his past with Isobel. When things fell awkwardly quiet between them Caroline broke it. “You know what we need?” they all just looked at her. “Dancing. There is a band at the grill.” She looked at her friends for their thoughts.

They all said they were in then looked at Katie. “When was the last time you let loose and had real fun?” Bonnie asked.

“Fine. I’m in.” Katie answered with a roll of her eyes.

TVDTVDTVD

Katie was sitting at a table that her friends stood around, talking to Caroline about her situation with Matt, when Caroline took off her jacket and headed up on stage where the band had finished up a song. “Caroline can sing?” Katie asked Bonnie and Elena when Caroline said that she was going to sing. Bonnie and Elena watched as Caroline compelled the band to let her sing. “Whoa, she’s really good.” As Katie watched Caroline laying it all out on the table for Matt all she could think about was Damon and Elijah. Feeling on the verge of a panic attack Katie whooshed outside unseen by anyone

She had been bottling it up, not really letting anyone know how screwed up she felt inside. While she had been angry at Damon for his lies and secrets and angry at Elijah for doing this to her she hadn’t let herself feel the grief of losing Elijah or feel the hurt of Damon’s actions. It all came out a wave of tears as she pressed her back against the side of the building in the alley way. She was so wrapped up in her grief that it took a minute for the screams coming from the building to register. She was on her way to the back entrance since people were pouring out of the front one when she heard Elena calling her name. Not knowing what was going on she sped over to where she heard Elena to see that she was with Damon. “What’s going on?”

“I’ll explain later.” Damon told her and she just looked back and forth between him and Elena.

“Jonas is in there and he’s after me.” Elena told her so Katie nodded.

“What can I do to help?” Katie asked Damon with wide eyes.

“Jonas doesn’t know Elena’s out here with me. Katherine’s in there pretending to be her. You need to get in there and make sure he stays off our trail.” He told her in a rush.

“Will do.” Katie nodded then ran into the building to find sparks flying off of the busted stage lights and the bar was on fire.

“Matt no!” Caroline’s scream caught Katie’s attention and she whooshed over to see that Jonas had stabbed him in the neck with a broken bottle. She didn’t bother stopping Jonas when he ran out of the bar. Instead she went to Matt’s side across from Caroline. “Caroline, look at me.” Caroline looked up from her hand that was pressed to Matt’s neck showing the veins that were popping under her reddening eyes that mirrored her own. “Breathe. Can you do it or do I need to?”

“I can do it.” she nodded so Katie jerked her head down to Matt. Caroline made a pained sound as she bit her wrist then pressed it to Matt’s lips. “I’ve got him.”

“Are you sure?” Katie asked with wide eyes and Caroline nodded as the veins disappeared. “I’m going to go make sure the building’s clear.”

“No, the fire’s getting too big. We both need to leave now.” Caroline stopped her as she picked Matt up from the ground.

“Fine, then let’s get out of here.” Katie said with a wave to the door

TVDTVDTVD

After Elena and Katherine were switched back and things calmed down, Elena texted Katie letting her know that Jonas was dead leaving Bonnie without her powers. Katie had gone home, but after thinking about it for a few minutes she decided she could no longer suffer in silence.

So with a deep breath she threw her cell phone into her shoulder bag and headed to the boarding house. She didn’t bother knocking and let herself in to find Damon’s bedroom door open. Katherine, wearing a black negligee and an open black robe was laying on the bed with Damon. Katie watched as Katherine crawled up Damon like a seductress out of a romance novel. Damon grabbed her face as she was attempting to kiss him and a jealous green bubble grew in the pit of Katie’s stomach. “Katherine, there are six other bedrooms in this house. Go find one.” he shoved her face, throwing her off of him.

Damon was about to return to the book he was reading, but his eyes found Katie as she walked into the room glaring at Katherine. “Get out.”

“I turn you, and save your friend and that’s the thanks I get?” Katherine asked as she slid off the bed with a cocky look on her face then crossed her arms.

Katie hadn’t seen Katherine since she killed her and the anger that welled up in her was almost overwhelming. But she decided to be the bigger woman and walked over to her with murderous eyes. “Okay.” Katie put on a fake smile as she said, “Thank you for playing a game of switch-a-roo with Elena tonight.” She let her smile fall and went back to glaring at her. “But no matter how many good deeds you do you will always be the manipulative, skeezy bitch who took my human life and killed my unborn child.” Katherine cocked her head to the side as she glared back at Katie as if she were about to rip her head off. “Now get…out.”

“You’re lucky I like you.” Katherine told her as she pointed at her then dropped her hand as she walked out of the room.

“I like jealous Katie.” Damon told her as he set the book to the side and sat up.

“Do you have any idea how hard it was to not break her freaking neck?” she asked, making a twisting flick motion with her hands as she walked over then flopped down on her back across the foot of his bed.

“I’d pay to see that.” He commented making Katie smirk over at him, but she remembered that she was still mad at him and turned her eyes to the ceiling. “You still mad at me?” he asked, his face turning serious.

“I don’t know. You kept your plan to kill Elijah a secret from me, flat out lied to me, and in doing so caused Elijah to do exactly what he warned you he would do if you crossed him. Now the first, first love is laying in your basement with a dagger in his chest and my second first love hurt me so bad that it took my friend being in danger to even be able to look at him.” she looked over at him to see him frowning with wide eyes. “What do you think?”

His eyes turned apologetic. “I’m sorry.” Katie pursed her lips and pulled them to the side. “I knew if I told you about the dagger you’d try to stop me from using it.”

“But you didn’t know that.” Katie sat up and leaned back against the sturdy footboard. “You once again just… assumed that I would react a certain way and you once again assumed wrong.”

“So you wouldn’t have tried to stop me from killing Elijah?” he asked doubtfully as he crossed his arms over his chest.

“Before that failure of a dinner party?” she asked as she bent her knee up and rested her am on it. “No.”

“And now that you have Hannah’s memories?” he asked.

She dropped her eyes to the plush comforter and started picking at her cuticles, something she noticed she never did as Hannah. “Now I want to go down to that basement, pull the dagger out of him and kiss him.” she looked up at him, fighting her emotions that were so much more powerful now than they were when she was human. She bit her lip and shrugged not knowing what else to say.

“So what’s stopping you?” he asked with a frown and a glance at the door.

“You.” she answered and her voice didn’t waver, but Damon saw tears pooling in her eyes. “I heard Elijah when he told you that I’d forget all about you if he gave me my memories back. Obviously that’s not true…” She looked back down at her hands and started picking at a loose string in the stitching of the comforter, “Because I’m here.”

“But?” he asked and she looked up at him to see that he looked worried about what was about to come out of her mouth.

“But you and I…” she bit her lips closed and shook her head as she shrugged, “We seem to be in this cycle of I trust you…you break it, I forgive you and for about two seconds we’re happy then something happens and you break my trust again. I realize that’s over simplifying it and leaving out the elephant size mistake I made with Elijah, but…we are going to have to be a team, on the same page 24/7 or kiss our relationship goodbye.”

“Fine, then let's get on the same page.” He told her as he slid from the bed and headed for the door. “I’ll go first.”

“Where are you going?” she asked, not moving from the bed.

“I need a drink.” He answered as if it was obvious. “You comin’?”

“Yep.” She hopped off the bed and followed him to the study. He poured two glasses of bourbon then handed her one. Her eyes slid shut at the taste of the amber liquid and when she opened them as she swallowed she saw Damon smirking at her. “What?”

“Have I turned you into a bourbon girl?” he asked with a look at her glass.

“Maybe.” She answered coyly with a look down at her glass then back up at him. “You said you’d go first.”

He had opened his mouth to say something when Katherine walked in and between them to the table of decanters they stood at. “Don’t let me interrupt.” She sighed as she started picking through the crystal containers. Katie gritted her teeth and looked at Damon agitatedly. He jerked his head back toward his room. Katie grabbed the decanter of bourbon out of Katherine’s hand. “Um, hello.” She complained as Katie walked around her.

“Um, goodbye.” Katie mocked her tone. As they headed back to Damon’s room Katie refilled her glass then handed the decanter to him and made herself comfortable on his bed with her back leaned against the headboard and her bare feet crossed at the ankles. “Now…shoot.”

“I didn’t just want Elijah dead because of the whole Elena sacrifice thing. I wanted him dead because you wanted him.” he told her then took a drink.

“I told you that I didn’t want him.” she argued.

“And we both know that was a load of bull.” He argued back, making her look down at her drink. “If you didn’t want him you wouldn’t have kissed him.”

“So when I called you and you said that you weren’t mad at me for kissing him and that you understood because you’d made mistakes too…what was that? Lie number one?” she asked with creased brows.

“No I was never mad at you. I was mad at him for having so much control over you with his stupid linking spell.” He told her and she looked down at the glass in her hands that rested on her outstretched legs. “John came by after you left for the sleepover and gave me the dagger and I knew what I had to do to get you out from under his spell.” He kept placing all the blame on Elijah.

“Damon…there’s something you need to know about the linking spell.” She started, staring at her drink then paused to finish it. She looked up at him as she swallowed. “Elijah isn’t the one that had Fiona do the spell…I did it. He didn’t know that we worked the spell until Klaus killed me. If he did know he never said anything to me about it.” she slipped from the bed and refilled her glass. “So, are you still not mad at me?” she asked as she walked back over to the bed but didn’t sit down.

“I don’t know.” He answered with a far off look in his eyes. She gave him a few minutes to think about it, but when he never said anything she walked over to where the decanter was sitting on his dresser and put her glass down next to it. she was reaching for the doorknob when he whooshed over, wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her into him. “I am not going to lose you because of a decision you made over a hundred years ago.” He told her with a stubborn look on his face as he stared into her green eyes. “You’re not walking out of this room until we are back in a good place and I’ve heard the words I forgive you come out of your mouth.”

“You think we can accomplish that in one night?” she asked knowing it was already really late.

“Yep.” He nodded and let her go.

“Okay.” She grabbed her glass and took a drink. “Then I’ll tell you that I’m sorry I didn’t tell you exactly how much of an effect Elijah had on me before the whole…makeout session behind a building thing.”

“You said you kissed him not made out with him.” he pointed at her with the hand that held his glass. “Which one was it?”

“Now you’re just trying to torture us.” Katie complained but Damon just rolled his eyes and gave her a look that told her to answer the question. “Fine if you want to know specifics…” she set her glass on the dresser and pressed her back against the wall and motioned him over with her finger.

He walked over with a smirk on his face that showed off one side of his smile lines. “What are you doing?”

“Answering your question.” She said with a shrug as she grabbed his shirt and pulled him into her. “In a way that’ll make it a little easier to swallow, so to speak.” Without warning she grabbed the back of his neck and pulled him into her, kissing him with the same genuine hunger she had felt when kissing Elijah. After making out with him for a few seconds she jumped and his hands that were already holding her by her hips pressed her harder into the wall holding her up as she wrapped her legs around him. She tilted her head to the side giving him the subtle hint that she wanted him to kiss her neck. He took it and kissed down her jaw line to her neck. If Damon had been wearing a button up shirt she would’ve started unbuttoning it, but he was wearing a black t-shirt. So instead she grabbed it and pulled it over his head. She took her hands off of him and moved her arms out to the side, pressing her palms into the cold wall behind her. "This is when I stopped him, but you are more than welcome to keep going." She whispered as the bourbon and lust mixed together to create a fun cocktail within her bloodstream.

"You're drunk." He told her between kisses.

"I’m tipsy and I've missed you." She confessed as she slid her hands up his torso then held the sides of his neck. "Going a week without sex as a vampire is excruciating."

"We're getting off topic." He sing-songed as he slid his hand down to hold her thighs making her sigh from his touch.

"Or did we find a better one?" She countered and he growled as he stepped back and let her go. "Damon." She drug out his name with whine as she watched him walk over to the bed and flop back on it, laying across the middle of it.

"You made out with him..." he complained.

"And I'm sorry." She told him as she walked over and sat down on the bed next to him. "If it makes you feel any better I hated how out of control and not myself I felt when it was happening." She told him with a hopeful tone and a cringe of a smile. He just cut his eyes over at her. “Oh and I didn’t take his shirt off. I just undid a few buttons.” She added.

“It doesn’t.” he told her then turned his eyes to the ceiling.

“Of course it doesn’t.” she sighed and fell back with her head at the head of the bad and her legs draped over his hips.

“We can’t trust each other.” He said still looking up at the ceiling with a frown on his face.

“No we can’t,” she replied looking up at the ceiling as she crossed her arms over her chest. “but I want to.” Neither of them said anything and thanks to the fact that she had abandoned her bourbon glass she was starting to sober up and she figured he was too. She thought about why Damon killed Elijah and kept the dagger a secret from her. It was selfish of him, killing Elijah so he could keep her for himself, but she was also being selfish for wanting Elijah to stay daggered so that she could be with Damon without the linking spell constantly putting stress on their relationship. “I forgive you.”

Damon looked over at her with furrowed brows. “What?”

“I forgive you.” she repeated herself.

“Are you just saying that so you can leave?” he asked and she shook her head.

“No.” she told him with a small shake of her head. “And I hope you will one day forgive me for what I’m about to say.” Damon sat up and looked at her with wide worried eyes. “This link…will always be there. Even if we get back together…somebody is bound to pull that dagger out and when they do the switch will get flipped and once again old feelings will resurface and we’ll just end up right back where we are right now.”

“So you’re just gonna give up on us?” he asked with a frown.

“No…I’m saving you from a lifetime of misery…from always wondering if I’m going to be drawn back to him.” she argued then slid from the bed and headed for the door.

He whooshed in front of her. “Not happening.”

“Damon.” She sighed and dropped her eyes to the floor.

“We’re stronger than any magic link will ever be and I refuse to let you walk out that door.” He did his eye thing with a flick of his brows as he said the word refuse.

“So what?” she asked with a shrug of her shoulders. “We just forgive each other, get back together and pretend that we trust each other?”

“No. We get back together and learn to trust each other.” he told her with eyes that bore into hers. “Because I’ll be damned if I’m going to lose this.” He grabbed the back of her head and pressed his lips to hers, catching her bottom lip between his.

She knew it would be pointless to try to walk away from Damon. No matter how dysfunctional they were, they kept ending up together. So she jumped and wrapped her legs around him. He held her face in his hands, kissing her as he carried her over to his bed and laid her down.

TVDTVDTVD

“So did I miss anything in my week of moping?” Katie asked from where she laid under the comforter with her head on Damon’s shoulder.

“We figured out how Elijah and his witch buddies were planning on killing Klaus.” He answered and Katie rolled onto her stomach and propped her head up with her elbows and hands to look at him. “He was looking for where a bunch of witches were burned. If he found it he was going to have Jonas absorb all the power they left behind and take Klaus down while he was weak.”

“Do we know where they were burned?” she asked curiously.

He nodded his head yes, but sighed and said, “nope.” He grabbed his phone out of his pants on the floor and typed a message. “I found in a Gilbert journal that Emily was burned where those witches were burned. I know where Emily was burned.”

“Well that sucks.” Katie sighed and rolled back over, playing along because Katherine was probably listening in.

“Yep.”

#damon salvatore #damon salvatore fanfiction #damon salvatore x oc #tyler lockwood #tyler lockwood fanfiction #tyler lockwood x oc #elijah mikaelson #elijah mikaelson fanfiction #an elinity fic sneak peek #Klaus mikaelson #klaus mikaelson fanfiction #klaus mikaelson x oc #the vampire diaries #the vampire diaries fanfiction #tvd fanfiction #the originals #the originals fanfiction

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lightsandlostbells · 5 years ago

Text

wtFOCK season 3, episode 1 reaction

So! It’s a million years too late, but I decided to talk about wtFOCK season 3.

I had fairly positive feelings about S1 of wtFOCK. It was the scrappy underdog of the Skam remakes, in a way, and what it lacked in polish, it made up for authenticity. I was very willing to overlook its flaws because of what I perceived as genuine attempts to connect with teenagers. I was really, really holding out hope that future seasons would improve on its flaws. And ... well. (Disclaimer: I still haven’t seen S2. Sorry! I just failed to keep up with all the remakes and S2 is my least fave so I didn’t feel that motivated to make it a priority, even though I did like Zoë a lot in S1.)

Heads up - I didn’t care for this season. A lot of people did, and I would never, ever want to ruin someone’s enjoyment of something, even if I personally didn’t like it. So please take this as a warning that I have a lot of negative things to say, and don’t read if it’s going to harsh your buzz for a pairing or a story that you deeply love. However, I didn’t want to just be grumpy and angry the whole time, so I tried to think of constructive ways to fix certain problems I had with this season. No guarantees that they’re satisfying solutions, but it was an interesting exercise.

Also, I didn’t watch this in real time, and I paid barely any attention to fandom reactions and/or drama, so it’s very possible that I am missing context, or that pacing issues didn’t register with me quite as strongly, etc. If one of the actors ate a live dolphin on Instagram, and then got into a fight with fans on Twitter about their right to eat live dolphins, and now fandom has canceled the problematic dolphin-eating actor, I legit do not know, do not come at me if I’m like “This actor is doing a good job” with “Wow, didn’t know you stanned dolphin-eaters??? YIKES.” Honestly, for the purposes of just grading this season on a storytelling level, I would prefer not to know anything about the cast or crew unless it directly has an impact on the show itself.

Clip 1 - House party

OK, I did like this flashy intro shot, immersing us in the Wild ‘n’ Crazy Teen Party of Wild ‘n’ Crazy Youths.

Amber rejecting every dude in site … When Will Gay Vilde Rise. (I know there have been some f/f storylines in the remakes, but if there’s one involving an actual Vilde, please let me know.)

Luca saying “We’re not walking around in a high school drama” - you can hear the rimshot.

I do like the transition from the party up to the bathroom, that’s a cool shot. wtFOCK’s directing so far is more ambitious than it was in S1.

Robbe is clearly a mess and they acknowledge his problems at home right off the bat.

We go back downstairs. wtFOCK’s version of Magnus knocks his drink on Amber and she gets pissed. She gives him the finger and he falls in love. Still a better love story than S3 Daphne/Basile.

It’s a small point, but I don’t get why we didn’t get this moment before jumping up to the bathroom with Robbe and the others? It would be a far smoother transition, just on a practical level and also in the sense of fully immersing us in Robbe’s POV after a quick update with the other characters.

Belgian Magnus joins the guys in the bathtub and announces he’s in love. They roast him when they find out it’s Amber and start talking about hot chicks. Moyo starts grilling Robbe about his type of girl, in a crass, sexual way.

This is honestly not a bad start to Robbe’s story at all. Robbe is clearly more reluctant to get into his interest in girls than Isak was - Isak was more fuckboyish from the start, Robbe seems like he’s about to start squirming and doesn’t really give an answer to Moyo’s questioning. Which is fine! I think it’s fine to start off the POV character at different stages of performing heterosexuality, as long as it’s taken into account in the writing of the character’s whole arc. The fact that the boy talk is so crude and sexual just ramps up Robbe’s alienation.

I swear, I will never understand how the girls in this scene just go into the bathroom and pee in front of strange boys … like maybe I am just a ~prude but that seems like a recipe for disaster and I would not trust those little fuckers to not be secretly recording me on the toilet.

Her peeing is kind of a power move, like marking her territory.

Also L M A O at Robbe starting to flirt with the girl while she is pissing … like now this comes off as a kink thing. OK, Robbe. Jokes aside, this gets across the same meaning as the scene with Isak: he starts to flirt with her because he was encouraged by the other guys.

Uh, flush the toilet, lady. And use some TP.

Now this version of Emma seriously radiates some Natalie Portman in The Professional vibes.

She orders him to stand up and then starts kissing him. I get way less of a vibe of Robbe’s mad game with women (like how Isak negged Emma into kissing him) and more like this girl is the love interest out of an indie romcom, all mysterious and spunky. She kisses him like once after taking his jay and then leaves. The boys all crack up. Moyo tells Robbe it’s his responsibility to get the weed back which lmao, no it’s not, all you assholes were there and could have intervened.

This scene is perfectly fine and even effective! Not entirely the same vibes as OG, but it still has a purpose and some obvious cause-and-effect, and there are some nice stylistic choices.

Clip 2 - Party pt. 2

Robbe is now making out with mystery girl. We already have a divergence in characterization from OG. Isak was being performative about making out with Emma and shut it down once the guys left. Robbe is making out with this girl because he wants to be straight, I guess? If it’s not to appeal to his friends, it’s likely that this is for himself. Again, I have no real problem with this change if it’s incorporated into Robbe’s overall arc and characterization. My thing is, if you’re writing this scene, do you realize the differences in characterization? Or do you think this is interchangeable from what happened with Isak? The latter is where you run into problems, because then the writing shows lack of nuance. I bring this up here because, well, you can guess how I feel about later events.

Luca seems rather aggro about the mystery woman, which I assume is because she still has the hots for Robbe?

It makes me laugh that we got this first-person POV as Robbe leaves through the garage, because of the “Smack My Bitch Up” song being played in the last clip (the song had an infamous music video, banned from MTV in the ‘90s, that was from a first-person POV). But again, WTFock is trying harder with the cinematography and direction, good for them.

Robbe ditches the cops by jumping on the bike with Belgian Emma. OK, I get it, Belgian Emma is too cool for school.

I have kinda mixed feelings on that, actually. I mean, I’ll be honest - I don’t see why any Emma has to be made into someone more palatable. Definitely don’t demonize her or present her in a misogynistic way! She deserves sympathy and dignity as much as any character on a Skam. But … it’s fine if she and the Isak aren’t like, amazingly compatible except for his sexuality. The Even character is supposed to be the one who really shakes up the Isak’s world! The Isak is supposed to be lost and confused and drifting and then Even comes in and is someone he can really open up to. Not just because he’s another guy who’s into guys, but because Even’s personality meshes with Isak’s so easily while still challenging him and introducing him to new things. In a way, it does kinda diminish the effect of the Even if the Isak meets ANOTHER mysterious stranger who’s an awesome person. Or at the very least, it lessens the feeling of the Isak’s detachment from everything.

And again, this could work if the writing realizes it. You can totally craft a subtly different arc from the pieces of Isak’s season. It’s just that (speaking from the future) I do not feel this is what happened.

Clip 3 - Tagging time

I don’t think it’s necessary to break up all the parts of a longer scene/set piece into a bunch of different clips. If you start a scene at 16:00, it’s OK to have the clip take place over several hours. You don’t need to chop it up unless there’s a reason why this pacing might benefit the story. Honestly, if you’re watching in real time, I think this method is often less effective at building tension/emotion/etc. But wtFOCK is not the first remake to try this tactic.

... this part where Robbe and Noor put on masks sure hits differently in 2020.

Belgian Emma’s name is Noor and she takes him to a warehouse, or something? It’s very secret and Cool Kid. And IDK, it’s fun, but again… I think making the Emma that much of a fun mysterious cool exciting person is very much diminishing the effect of Robbe’s isolation. We had a good start with establishing that alienation while he was in the tub, but now his reactions to her rad hipness feel way too sincere and act against the major character conflict of his season. He seems nervous to go with her, but not because he’s with a girl, just because it’s a risky scenario.

Noor hands Robbe a spray paint can and leads him to tag a wall. There’s a guy taking pictures. So I’m assuming one of the guys in masks is the Even? The POV seems to shift to the photo guy briefly, like we’re seeing Robbe through his eyes. And even though I’m not a fan of POV breakage, I do think this is a cool way to introduce the Even without really introducing him, you know? If that’s him. (EDIT from the future: Ummm, so that wasn’t Sander, right? I’m rewatching and it doesn’t look like him. Soooo that part has even less relevance than I originally thought. Got it.) (EDIT from the future beyond the future: @hellswolfie tells me that this actually was Sander, so I am just bad at recognizing people, lol.)

Robbe and Noor take off their masks briefly to kiss. Uhhhh, did the scene really just … cut off there? Because L M A O what a weird choice. We don’t get to see what Robbe creates on the wall, which could be a great way to establish his character, AND we end with him on a smiley, contented note which does not boost his POV at all. It legit just makes him seem like a guy who’s into this girl, and sorry, even if that’s his public persona at this point in time … that’s not what we, the audience should be getting at all.

Clip 4 - Boy squad morning after

Robbe skateboards to meet up with the guy squad. Again, the directing is far better IMO than in S1.

Robbe got the weed back so that conflict is over, I guess.

He gets a call from his mom and stops laughing with the guys and gets serious. He walks away to take the call. Then he starts to open up to Jens about his mom freaking out, and then Moyo spots some girls so they all ditch Robbe to go chase girls, and WOW, Jens, please turn in your Jonas card.

Don’t love that we didn’t hear his mom on the phone. There’s no reason not to let us hear what she’s saying since it would be in Robbe’s POV AND as it turns out, they just tell us about the situation with his mom right off the bat, anyway, so it’s not like there’s much point in hiding it.

This was effective in a sense to establish how girl-crazy his friends are, as well as setting up Robbe’s isolation, which I was worried wouldn’t come across as strongly after meeting Noor. But I think they could have NOT mingled in his mom issues to make this part more effective. Like if the goal was to show more of Robbe being alienated because he’s gay, then that’s not entirely successful, because there are non-gay reasons why Robbe wouldn’t join his pals on the girl chase. I mean, even a horny hetero Robbe might not want to chase girls with his bros because talking to his mom is a downer, so it’s not necessarily because of his sexuality. Plus he just found a girl he liked in Noor, so apparently, he’s not on the prowl. What this part IS communicating that the Belgian guy squad doesn’t have much interest in their friend’s family struggles, which ... ehhhh, maybe not great in the grand scheme of the storyline? These guys can be flawed, for sure, but we do need them to care about Robbe’s well-being. And Robbe tried to open up here, so the flaw is not in him, it’s in his friends. I’m going to let it slide because Jens was offering to help Robbe in the first clip, so it’s not like he’s been a totally insensitive friend this whole time.

Clip 5 - Phone call from Robbe’s dad

Noor jumps on Robbe and they make out. She shows him the garage and they talk about the tagging world or w/e. Again, not sure why they are portraying Noor as like … a legit love interest. I don’t get much of a sense of discomfort from Robbe. Isak was just not into Emma and was uncomfortable when his bathroom flirting came back to haunt him. And I don’t think it’s TERRIBLE not to follow that route, but you can’t just make this huge change if you don’t account for it in future episodes and Robbe’s overall arc. (EDIT from the future: Which I don’t think they do, otherwise I wouldn’t care.) Every scene should count in furthering Robbe’s character, especially this early in the season where we’re just getting to know his particular struggles. If Robbe is trying to convince himself to like girls, then I want to see definite vulnerability in how that’s portrayed.

I blame the directing/writing more than the acting for the lack of discomfort, since I sensed Robbe’s lack of comfort just fine in the bathtub scene.

Makeouts get interrupted when Robbe’s dad calls. Again, not sure why we aren’t hearing both sides of the conversation? Because we’re in Robbe’s POV. Why wouldn’t we hear them? This seems like they just want to create some suspense or mystery over the situation with his parents. But it’s perfectly possible to do so while still letting us in on the phone calls. In fact, it’s arguably more intriguing to let us listen to some phone calls where we get some vague details but nowhere close to the whole story. It’s not like Robbe’s dad is going to explain the whole situation to his son in an exposition dump. We can get some crumbs to tease us, while still keeping us in Robbe’s POV and not feeling like the show is cutting corners.

Robbe gets mad at his dad and tells Noor he needs to be alone. Closeup on Noor as Robbe walks away. OK … why? Why on her and not Robbe when it’s his POV? Why the focus on Noor’s feelings when we really need to be establishing our protagonist’s mindset in the beginning of this season? I’m not saying her feelings don’t matter, I’m saying that well, this isn’t her story. It would be better to see Robbe’s pained reaction as he leaves.

Clip 6 - Robbe’s dad drama

Jens comes running up while Robbe is being sad. Robbe says that it may be necessary for him to stay with Jens because Robbe’s mom has been committed to a mental health institution and Robbe doesn’t want to stay with his dad. Ah, so I guess we’re hearing that right away. Which honestly makes not hearing his phone calls to his parents even funnier - like you lock us out of his POV arguably for the suspense, but then you end the suspense anyway by just telling us what happened a scene or two later? All right. I guess there’s suspense in that we don’t know exactly what’s up with the mom, mental health-wise, or the root of Robbe’s problems with his dad.

It occurs to me that maybe they just didn’t want to hire people to voice Robbe’s parents? Or put in the time to film both sides of the conversation? I have a hard time believing either of those because it’s so lazy, but.

I mean, just turn the phone conversations into text conversations if you’re not going to let us listen to Robbe’s parents on the other end.

They go and play football without really resolving the situation. Sad music plays while Robbe joins in. Also, someone was calling Robbe, and I assume it was his dad, but it’s not shown.

These clips are VERY short and choppy so far. You could easily combine the last two, so Robbe is with Jens instead of Noor when he gets the other phone call from his dad, leading into this conversation.

We know immediately about Robbe’s mom’s situation instead of it being a mystery, like with Isak. Which, again, isn’t inherently wrong, but then I want them to DO SOMETHING with it.

Clip 7 - Jens and Jana

Oh hey, Jana got her braces off! IDK if that happened last season or this one, but it was something I liked, seeing a teenage girl with braces on a teen drama. That rarely happens unless it’s a joke or a plot point.

OK, they really need to film Robbe’s phone so I can actually see who’s calling…

Jens tells Jana about Robbe’s parental situation. I’ll note that first she asks if something’s up with Noor, so news of the Robbe/Noor relationship must have traveled really fast since they’ve only just gotten together. Like Robbe and Noor are clearly dating, going off Jana’s comment, and not just hooking up. Then Belgian Magnus wants to know about hooking up with Amber. Meanwhile Robbe is having a conversation off screen with his dad? Guess it wasn’t important!

And that’s the problem, obviously. It’s his POV season, anything you decide to show SHOULD be important to his storyline.

Also … it’s fine that we’re focusing on Robbe’s shit home life since that’s relevant to his story, but almost nothing in these clips has set up Robbe’s attraction to men, and only slightly his lack of interest in girls, which was negated by him seeming very interested in a girl afterwards. And knowing how long this season takes to get going with the Even character, it’s a pretty glaring omission.

So we don’t see Robbe’s phone call with his dad, but he gets snappy about it when Jens asks. One of the boys (I can’t tell who) says that Robbe’s on his period. Gonna be real, I don’t care for this squad so far.

What was the point of this clip? We already know Robbe is having problems with his dad, which is the most relevant part to the plot here. We shouldn’t be wandering from Robbe’s POV so much, but even taking that into account … we already know Belgian Magnus likes Amber, so that’s not necessary to establish. And we didn’t need to see Jens tell Jana something we already know. I assume he tells her so Zoë can find out and offer a room, but there’s no reason to see Jens tell Jana this, so. Filler clip.

Clip 8 - Zoë and Robbe at the lockers

Yeah, Zoë offers Robbe a place to stay here, but again, we didn’t need to see the news travel down the Jens-Jana pipeline. It could have been condensed more efficiently.

Robbe doesn’t want to because he says his dad wouldn’t approve. Zoë says she hopes things get better with his mom and Robbe at first snaps and tells her to leave it, then says thanks. This is an actual good interaction, writing-wise, kudos.

I liked Zoë a lot in S1 and I like her here again. I really should watch her season despite my Noorhelm allergy. The scene of them kinda smiling at each other across the hallways reminds me that this is probably the strongest relationship in the whole season, tbh.

Why was this clip so short? So many of these clips could have been combined into one. I mean, Zoë could have said, “I heard from Jana who heard from Jens...” without us needing the previous clip. Although, did Robbe really want anyone else to know about his home life? Lol @ Jens just blabbing Robbe’s private business.

So I guess they didn’t set up the Eskild situation in S2 that would lead to Eskild offering Robbe a place to stay?

Clip 9 - Robbe gets roommates

Robbe is in Zoë’s room. He sees her “everyone you know is fighting a battle” quote next to the mirror, which is a detail I actually quite like in context with the rest of this storyline and Even’s condition. It’s a good Skam thesis overall.

I guess Zoë met with Robbe’s dad. Zoë calls him a tough cookie. Robbe doesn’t want to speak to him. They bond a little over their parental problems. Again, a nice detail.

Belgian Eskild appears and teases Robbe a little before announcing that Robbe’s dad has agreed to let him stay in the flat. Yay!

Oh, so Senne is staying there, too? At least they didn’t do a pointless Noorhelm breakup in this version.

Milan (the Eskild) tries to go in for a hug and Robbe isn’t cool with it, so at least that’s something with Robbe’s issues with men. (I think? The thing is, Robbe also does not really know Milan, so it’s not as weird that he’s not ready to be affectionate with a near-stranger.) (EDIT from the future: Keeping the S2 almost-kiss that’s referenced in the next clip in mind, I can rationalize this moment as a continuation of that awkwardness from Robbe’s POV.)

They chat with Lisa (Linn) who wants to direct Robbe on what he is and isn’t allowed to touch in her room, heh. Milan and Zoë have cute interaction, and Robbe looks happy. I do like the flatmate vibe so far, they seem fun.

Clip 10 - Robbe and Milan

Senne and Zoë get cute. I haven’t seen S2 so I can’t give my opinion on their version of Noorhelm, but I did think a few things about them were less creepy in wtFOCK’s S1 than in OG. Milan talks about how they’re a Disneylike couple and Robbe laughs.

Then Robbe apologizes for something that evidently happened in S2, where Milan tried to kiss Robbe at a party? Again, I didn’t see the scene. Milan says he’d never try to do that. He offers Robbe a hug, which he accepts - tbh I don’t know if Robbe SHOULD accept based on where he is in his character arc, maybe he should have more skittishness? But it’s a nice character moment, at least. They really have to make up for lost time with the Robbe-Milan relationship, so I can get that they need to establish some closeness fast.

Not being in the wtFOCK fandom, I kinda wonder if there was backlash to that scene from before and this is damage control, LMAO.

I feel like you could’ve tweaked this to be more representative of Robbe’s issues, like have him stress here that he’s not gay, because it’s a sweet scene but again, I don’t feel like this episode built up Robbe’s internal dilemma very well. You could make this not just about smoothing over whatever bump there was in this relationship, but also about setting up some internal tension with Robbe’s sexuality issues. Multi-tasking - it’s great!

EDIT from the future: OK, I tracked down the S2 scene, and yeah, while it illustrates some of Robbe’s internalized homophobia, I really think you needed to carry this through to this clip. Because that was a very public situation, and they made a point of emphasizing onlookers’ reactions. I feel like you need to show that Robbe’s internalized homophobia isn’t just about external reactions, but internal struggles, because ... so far, that’s what it is? Like what is he doing with Noor otherwise?

Clip 11 - Housewarming party

Party is underway. Yasmina is there and is friendly with Robbe. It sounds like they’re working on a school project together. Aaron (Magnus) and Moyo are talking about hot chicks again.

Noor arrives and the boys tease Robbe about how far he’s gone, Robbe looks pretty chill and happy until Moyo says Robbe’s getting laid tonight and you can see the nerves and reluctance take over. Okay! A character detail that actually works for his arc! Yes!

Partying, makeouts with Noor … sorry but they are wasting a lot of time with this relationship. ROBBE ISN’T INTO HER. Here’s the thing: I don’t want to demonize any of Evak’s female “love interests,” right? It’s pointless anyway because Evak is the endgame pairing, Sonja and Emma aren’t “threats” in the end, but also because they’re not bad people just for wanting to date these two guys who happens to want each other instead. And I think you can do interesting things with Sonja and Emma as characters. I’ve read Sonja fanfic that’s really good!

But when it comes down to it … this is not the story of Robbe/Noor, and there’s a point where it feels like there’s too much development for something that is really intended to be a speed bump in Robbe’s journey.

I guess it’s a pet peeve of mine when gay stories devote a ton of time to het relationships, to the point where it begins to overshadow the main gay relationship. Love, Victor did this to an absolutely ridiculous degree. (I actually made notes for Love, Victor reactions, but hesitated to post them because 60% consisted of me typing I DON’T CARE ABOUT THESE STRAIGHT ROMANCES.) And I GET it, this is an experience many gay kids go through in their coming out journey, but also, less charitably… you don’t need het romance to dominate everything. You don’t need to make this about how a gay person being gay hurts a straight person. I genuinely appreciate that once Isak kisses Even, it’s fucking over with him and Emma, that plot thread is done.

Anyway, Noor tells Robbe he’s so fucking hot and Robbe looks more uncomfortable, moreso when she wants to see his room and he goes off like he’s headed to Mordor.

Aaron checking out Amber … okay, again with all the het. I don’t care!!! This is not important right now!!

Noor pushes Robbe onto the bed, ugh please don’t have them Go There.

She takes off her top and Robbe touches her boob like he’s sticking his hand into a porta-potty. We see his discomfort so at least this part is effective and relevant to Robbe’s arc. Noor is taking off her bra when the boys come into the room, wanting the weed. Okay, you dumb fucks, you’re teasing your bro about getting laid and yet you think it’s cool to enter his room when he’s with a girl? I mean, that’s a lucky break for Robbe, but his friends are extra stupid.

The mood is killed, Robbe goes hunting for weed. Episode ends.

HOW I WOULD REWRITE THIS EPISODE:

Lmao, some of my changes sounded a lot like “be like OG Skam S3.” Because Skam S3 was well-written and made sense. But I tried to think of edits that worked with what wtFOCK was presenting, not just repeating OG.

(I’m also repeating a few things in this section that I said above, btw)

While this episode doesn’t make me angry or anything, it’s got a serious problem with dithering. The first clip is a solid start to the season, but afterwards, so many of these clips feel like filler. There’s a lack of substance to them. It was hard to write about them because they ended up feeling like two minutes of nothing.

Did we need to see repetitive mentions of Robbe’s troubled relationship with his dad? No, it’s an important plot detail but we could have established that more concisely in fewer clips. Did we need to see the process of how Robbe comes to stay with Zoë, Senne, and Milan? No, not really. Or at least not dragged out over at least three clips.

I don’t feel like I’m in Robbe’s head to the extent that I should be so far. Some of this is because the show just flat-out locks us out of his POV, like not showing the phone call in the Jens-Jana clip. But a lot of it is also because of the narrative dawdling. There’s just not as much to analyze unless I bring in Skam season 3 and project what we know about Isak onto Robbe. And that’s not a good way to adapt a story.

The framing of Robbe/Noor needs to change. Combine the bathroom intro with the aborted sex scene - the boys are sitting in the tub, teasing Robbe about getting laid, so he makes out with Noor and they go into a bedroom where he’s clearly not into this, and then Moyo and Aaron come in asking for weed because Robbe still actually has the weed from the bathtub at this point. Or do what Skam France did (can’t believe I’m referring to Skam France) and have the arrival of the cops interrupt the makeout/sex session and Robbe takes his cue to exit.

But frankly, it’s not great to have Robbe acting or looking too cozy with Noor, like this is a legitimate romantic arc except when it gets to the sex. The point is that this isn’t a romance. Even if you want to show some cuddly, non-sexual scenes with Noor, you have to show more of Robbe’s reluctance and fear throughout.

Show Robbe’s fucking phone conversations with his parents!!!! Good Lord. He’s not ordering a pizza. These are important aspects of his story. Capitalize on that family tension, show us what a bad place Robbe is in at the start of this season.

Now, about the lack of Even in this episode. Not introducing Even is a bold move, but not necessarily a smart one. Even’s introduction in Skam is not just the intro of “the love interest” - he’s the catalyst for almost everything in Isak’s story. Consider that in episode 1, Isak is seen mostly unhappy and bored - he’s distraught after kissing Emma, he’s checked out of his friends’ lunchtime girl talk, he zones out staring at his teacher’s boobs, he doesn’t want to be at kosegruppa. Isak is actually very passive and just going through the motions, doing what people tell him to do. But once Isak meets Even at kosegruppa - well, that’s when Isak wakes up. In the next few clips, we see Isak taking action. And sure, they’re small actions, searching for Even online, watching the Even video over and over, asking Vilde if there will be more kosegruppa meetings. But we can see that Isak now cares about something, he’s paying attention. Of course, Robbe’s story doesn’t have to follow the same arc. However, it does the season a huge benefit to get him intrigued by something at this point, so we the audience are not just sleepwalking along with him for a few episodes.

There’s also just the simple fact that we have only 10 episodes to establish a love story and make us care about the Even character, and it’s a very risky move to waste too much time. If you are really killing it with the rest of Robbe’s arc, this could still work, but ... well, that’s not what’s happening here.

If they didn’t want to full on introduce the Even directly, one thing they could do is subtly and indirectly find ways to include him in the narrative and create some mystery. Let’s say Robbe sees the Even’s artwork somewhere and is like whoa, that’s cool, and we can tell that it resonates with him. Or he admires Even’s graffiti, or it makes him laugh, whatever. Basically Robbe has some kind of emotional reaction to a thing the Even has created or done, which helps to set up that relationship even before we officially meet the Even.

If we want to add a little more, perhaps Robbe sees a mysterious dude in a mask tagging a wall, but they get interrupted by the cops or something and have some kind of brief but intriguing interaction with each other, and Robbe’s like, who was that guy in the mask? Or Noor takes Robbe to the tagging place, the police/security bust them, Robbe and Noor get separated, and Robbe gets helped out by the Even so he can escape. So it’s an important moment, lots of adrenaline, we can frame it like there’s a sudden ~charge~ between them (ooOOOooo the Even helped Robbe stand up and their hands touched like this was a fanfic, etc.), but he doesn’t learn Even’s name, maybe he doesn’t even see his face because Even has a mask on, so Robbe spends part of the next few episodes trying to figure out who that guy is, casually asking Noor if she knows a guy like that, keeping his eyes open. Maybe we have some fakeouts where Robbe thinks he sees the Even again but it’s just a false alarm. He’s on edge, eager to know more about that mystery guy, and so are we. Bam, we have “awakened” Robbe from his deep sleep.

If you’ve seen Netflix’s The Get Down, there’s even a scene like this where Jaden Smith’s character gets caught tagging by the cops, he runs and flees with another young dude, and they have a moment where they recognize each other as graffiti artists they admire. While watching that scene for the first time, without any context or spoilers, without even knowing if there would be LGBT content in that show, I immediately thought, “This guy is his love interest.” Not even because it was overtly romantic. Because the way it was written and shot told us that this meeting was important. Because they had an instant connection. Something similar could have worked for Robbe and his Even. But in any case: it would have been best to establish something between those characters, even if it wasn’t an “official” introduction.

Stop focusing on Aaron/Amber when it’s not in Robbe’s POV. Reverse the scene at the beginning with Aaron videotaping and Amber getting spilled on. She gets pissed, he falls in love, and then we follow him upstairs and we meet the boy squad. That is a very obvious, very clean transition that doesn’t interrupt Robbe’s POV as it technically hasn’t started yet. So IDK why they didn’t do that, lmao.

Some changes with the Milan relationship:

Tweak the apology scene to be more representative of Robbe’s issues. Have Robbe apologize while still stressing that he’s not gay. Have Milan be chill and not question that statement, but maybe Robbe is so defensive that it comes across as unconvincing.

Then have Milan be the one instead of the boys to interrupt the Noor almost-sex scene. Milan wanders in acting drunk, haha Milan, he’s wacky. Robbe doesn’t realize it (though the viewers do if they’re paying attention) but Milan is only pretending and is “subtly” rescuing Robbe because he realizes, based on the earlier scene, that Robbe might be struggling with his sexuality and he wants to give him an escape option. (Although I still think it’s best to combine the not-sex scene into the opening clip, but this could work, too.)

Basic questions we need to be asking, clip to clip: what is the conflict? Where is Robbe’s head right now? Why is this scene necessary? How did this scene come to be - what’s the cause and effect here? How does it advance Robbe’s story? Is it redundant? How do we tell this story in a narratively economical manner?

#wtfock reactions

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technicolor--dreams · 5 years ago

Text

Letter from Gene Kelly to his daughter Kerry

If you speak french, you can hear the whole letter being read here. Also, special thanks to @mostlydaydreaming for helping out during this journey trying to find the whole letter and translating it, and for letting me upload it in its entirety even though she originally posted the first half on her page.

P.S. grab a tissue, it’s very moving!

March 1943

Dear Kerry,

I can't wait until you're old enough for me to talk to you Kerry, and for you to talk to me. I have a lot to tell you and I want to make sure you understand me.

But maybe I shouldn't say that I want you to grow up. You’re so pretty now, I’m already worried. Imagine how worried I will be when you are seventeen ...

Kerry, when you grow up, I hope you will be an actress. If you’re not an actress, I hope you’ll be a singer or a dancer… Because I think it’s the most awesome profession in the world, with the most awesome people.

I especially hope that when you grow up Kerry, you will be able to work at what you like and raise your children in a less painful time than the one we know.

And if, as you grow up, you become an actress, I know you will work hard and try to do well. Because, believe me, it is only by trying to do things very well that, even if you fail, you will realize yourself and enjoy your work.

I always keep trying to be an actor, Kerry - and here are the things I learned along the way: you are useless when you are not honest. Honest in everything we do: studies, shows, attitude.

If you keep this honesty and sincerity in your work, and you have a certain natural talent, you will inevitably learn something and become brilliant.

... But it is I who must instill in you this notion of sincerity. Even if for that, I have to write it at the bottom of your cereal bowl.

Let’s skip all of your younger years, Kerry - I know it’s going to be a lot of fun for you, your mom and me. Because after the war, we are going to travel to small places where we went before your mother and I, and that we would like to see again. Strange little places that almost nobody knows or visits.

Maybe then we can spend a weekend in China or elsewhere, by plane, and you can see all the places your old father always wanted to see, but he never actually managed to visit.

And Kerry, please, for the love of Heaven, have a sense of humor. This is one of the blessings and virtues that you will never learn in catechism. But it’s a gift from God as wonderful as faith, hope and kindness ...

Always be ready to smile at anything and make people smile with you.

And it doesn't matter if it's old-fashioned: don't forget to work hard. Because it doesn't matter if you become beautiful and brilliant, you will never achieve anything without it.

Be nice to people, Kerry. Try not to hurt them. But don't get me wrong: I don't want you NOT to be a fighter, and not to fight for your rights. But be nice. The nicest thing in the world is to walk down the street and have people say "Hi, nice to see you! ", Really thinking it.

Let me tell you why I wanted to be an actor: I know that when you’re an actor, a good actor, you have to be an artist and look at the world that way. And when you’re an artist, a good artist, you do a lot of good.

Your old father knows all about it because he would like to do this job for this reason. Hopefully one day he can really say that he is an artist.

Don't be scared off by people who tell you that acting is tough, Kerry. Or that of singer, dancer, or any other theatrical profession. Because it is.

But all these hard knocks and struggles - believe me, you will often face them if you evolve in the world of the theater or in another similar medium - are good for you. And if you keep that sense of humor that I told you about, you’ll have a lot of fun too. Even when times are sad.

Also, being in the entertainment industry is always a thrill. Each new film, each new play, each new musical, each new ballet is a new adventure and marks the beginning of a whole new world. And that Kerry is something. Because it fuels interest in humanity. You have to stay interested ... I hate bragging about the woman I married - who, by accident, happens to be one of your loved ones, Kerry, by blood - but one of the things I love most about the show business is that it allowed me to meet your mother, my wife.

When you are a little older you will read the story of “Cinderella” and other fairy tales to whom wonderful things happened. But let me tell you a real, realistic fairy tale that will never cease to be a source of amazement for me.

I was putting on a show for Billy Rose in New York when a young red-haired girl with stars in her eyes came to me for a job as a dancer in the choir. She was an excellent dancer. She got the job. A few weeks later, I started going to lunch with her, then inviting her to dinner, and then taking her home the evening after the show. One evening after the show, we ran into a friend of mine named William Saroyan who, after a five-minute conversation, gave him the lead role in one of his new plays, "The Beautiful People".

She had never played a role on stage before. But he was so impressed with her sincerity, honesty and obvious beauty that he knew, from the first time he saw her, that she could play this excellent dramatic role in her important production, a great play New Yorker. It looks like one of those scenarios that nobody believes in in the movies - but it happened to that girl. Yes, that girl was your mother, Kerry, as you guessed I guess. The play was a success, and so was its performance. Then another of those miracles that theater makes possible happened.

I remember now what my mother and father told me about their childhood, the mistakes they made and the things they would like to have a chance to do again - all of this “went in one ear and out the other”...

And here I am a father now, trying to tell my child about these things that my parents have no doubt told me before. I hope that you will be smarter than your father and that you will remember some of them.

When I was going to school in Pittsburgh when I was a little boy, I was always afraid of doing anything "different". I always had to do what all the other boys did. Even though sometimes I didn't want a boy to pick on someone else and everyone to join him, it seemed normal to do, since it was what the whole world did, and that’s having enough courage, Kerry - to refuse to do something just because everybody does it.

I remember when my mother sent me to take dance lessons. I was, you could say, in a gang, and they all thought that dancing was for sissies and that real guys didn't do this kind of thing. I was often beaten while going to dance classes, and then when I got home, white as a sheet and the recipient of black eyes in many fights with the children who used to bother me. Now I love to dance. But because everyone thought it was a sissy thing I fought terribly with my parents until they finally let me quit. Bless them for their patience dealing with me!

Of course, Kerry, being a little girl, you're not exactly gonna get the same problems I've had when I was a little boy, but you may have similar ones and when you will have to face them, you’ll need the courage to make your own decisions, even if that means you have to be different, because, you see, those are the things that can make you successful. I'm in the theater - today I'm a dancer, so…

Kerry, if there's one thing that you really care about, do not be afraid to do it, no matter the number of people who make fun of you. Tell yourself that if you care so much about something, it has to be done. It's the same for the Curie school.Try to find out what you wish the most to do. Personally I hope you will go to university, but if you decide on the contrary it's okay, because what you'll get out of your studies will be proportional to your interest. I wasted many years when I was in college, but it wasn't anybody’s fault but mine, plus, the more effort, the more you learn. Nobody learns when you throw things in their face.

Even if some knowledge remains, I'm already thinking about the book that I'm going to buy you when you're old enough to read it.I really want for you to find out these great, adventurous, worlds of excitement and knowledge that others have lived and that you too can live, even as a child, thanks to these books. I just hope you enjoy reading enough, so you don't spend all your free time listening to all those radio shows we throw at children in these days.

I hope you'll use your imagination and that you won’t have any superficial ideas, but please, Kerry, don't grow up too quick because I'm crazy about you, I want to keep you close to me as much as possible.

But when you grow up, marry and have children who will look like you, I won't realize it right away, but it's the most amazing thing in the whole world.

With all my love, daddy.

#gene kelly #honestly i cried when i read this #especially as i translated the second half #his gentleness and strenght and moral grounding really pop out in his writing #and it's very touching

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hidelaney · 5 years ago

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Hi Delaney!

Ah, yes the quarantine. It’s getting to me. Definitely. Suddenly I have no office to go to. But it’s good, I think. Make the CEO realize the upper management has no literal reasons to keep us in the office. Like at all. Seriously, everyone from my team is working from home and the level of productivity is actually better. Because guess what? Not having people breathing down our necks is SUPER helpful. So HA!

Okay, about Larry Stylinson. You’re right, I did fall into YouTube Blackhole. And Twitter. And I just watched 1D San Siro concert. By watching, I mean I actually paused the work I’m doing and looked at the screen while it played. Admittedly I was also doing chores but! It wasn’t just background music! It counted!

When I said I could put Larry Stylinson in a microwave and be done with it, I mean the theories and compilation videos are so readily available and easy to digest like, comparable to instant meals.

It’s so neatly packaged, too. Like, I was introduced to Larry Stylinson basically yesterday. Now I could recite the storyline in my head whenever I please. Or when I want to please you, in this case.

Let’s see if I can get it all summarized down here. FYI, I’m borrowing your assumption that Taylor was in on it the whole time. And Eleanor, too. Because I actually know of her existence now! Character discovery! Except they’re real people so I feel the need to point out that I’m making all the assumptions all over the place. I’m doing this for you, my dear Delaney.

Keep in mind that we all need character growths and personal developments when I make non-flattering assumptions toward your favorite people here, ok?

First up! HS & TL met in a toilet.

Now it’s debatable whether it was during an X-Factor audition or Battle of the Bands. For the sake’s of my next argument, I’m going with they knew each other before X-Factor. Likely during their time in White Eskimo and The Rogue, respectively. Their (unconfirmed?) first words to each other were ‘Oops!’ & ‘Hi’

Up next, the X-Factor audition and getting put together in a band.

So here is where I kind of needed my first assumption for this to work. Their chemistry was so obviously through the roof. It made so much sense if they were already sort-of friends and then got put together in a band. Plus, I don’t think the way Louis jumped into Harry’s arms is something a relative stranger would do. And if they only knew each other out of everyone there, it’s no wonder they were both so apparently clingy and codependent. It’s like a situation where both of them went ‘I have no idea what’s gonna happen next, but at least I know you and you know me. So we’re bestie now. No take back!”

And then there’re video diaries, twitter cams, radio interviews, and other broadcasting media they appeared in. These need no explanation because you’ve probably seen all of them and I have functioning ears and eyes. So, yes, I saw videos of them being all disgustingly cute all over the place. During the so-called ‘Fetus’ phase (a wording which I personally find rather disturbing, no offense to your anatomy textbooks or anything.) They’re so sweet. Especially whenever there’s a mention of how they moved in and lived together. Their interactions must’ve been responsible for so many tooth cavities. So many aww-worthy moments. On stage, on screen, behind the scenes, potato cams. Basically everywhere in front of everyone.

Then 1D blew up and were well on their way to become their label’s biggest and brightest BCG-metrix star. It’s not hard to see why investors’d be invested (lol) in employing every marketing strategy possible to keep 1D in the spotlight.

There’s a twofold marketing exploitation to Larry Stylinson that I see from miles away.

Hard sell the heteronormative version of the boys. (To capture major market shares)

Never had Harry or Louis explicitly confirm nor deny their relationship status. (To capture additional market shares with queerbaiting)

But let’s say Harry and Louis were actually together and making 1) too difficult to achieve. Otherwise this whole thing falls apart like a wet house of cards.

Thus, here came what I’d like to call ‘dousing a fire with gasoline’. This is where there’s a sudden drop of their interactions in public and Larry Stylinson isn’t a cutesy smashup name of two boys who got along like a house on fire anymore. This is the part where a ship turned into a full fledged conspiracy theory. And it’s MEGA COOL WICKED awesome.

I say this in the nicest way possible. A tragedy is the grandest form of entertainments. Misery loves having friends.

Also, I’d like to say this. I’m having fun thinking of this as a fictional arc. Because I still feel like it will shatter my heart in to a million pieces if anything resembling what I write next was true.

Since breaking into US market was the Kickstarter into a global one, to the US 1D went.

This was where the heavy closeting got way more difficult to handle. Elounor had the excuse of Eleanor being a private citizen and therefore should be left alone for the most part. Haylor was the complete opposite. Taylor Swift was and still is an American Sweetheart. Harry Styles might have been the most famous British Harry if it weren’t for a (former?) prince and a wizard. (Seriously, we should not call any of our hypothetical future children ‘Harry’ unless you thought ‘Albus Severus Potter’ was a good idea. Poor kiddo.)

The saddest part about Harry Styles public image was how reminiscent of Emma Watson it felt. The minute they turned eighteen, their media portrayals immediately became hyper-sexualized. Suddenly, they left the human zoo into an open hunting game. Famous lives are terrifying.

Anyhow, say, Taylor Swift knew what the US music industry was like. She’s been playing the long game for quite some time. She got to know Harry and then became rather protective of him. Her conclusion was that ‘hyping up Haylor’ would: 1) increase media exposure for both Taylor and 1D which would translate to bigger channels of revenue for all involved, 2) hold the speculation about Harry’s sexual orientation at bay because, as horrible as it sounds, gays don’t sell in America.

This one fit nicely with your ‘Out of the Woods’ interpretation. Taylor wasn’t just spending time with Harry. She was actively enforcing the lock on the closet. Which explains why Louis seemed to resent Taylor quite obviously and quite a lot. His own heteronormative scripts with Eleanor had been relatively tame. Harry’s whirlwind series of romances in public had only just begun.

As Harry started gaining a womanizer reputation in earnest, so did the Almost-Subtle Couple Tattoo Sprees.

If ‘Always in my heart @Harry_Styles . Yours sincerely, Louis’ tweet was a sign that circumstances were about to go south for them. The tattoos were signs that the circumstances had already gone to shit. The tragic package had been shipped, signed, and delivered.

This is where non-flattering assumptions rise to the surface. I think 1D had been overworked past the point of exhaustion. Self-destruction as a coping mechanism became rather prevalent and pervasive within the band. The boys gleefully collected regrets as a new favorite pastime, some more than others. Consequences were nipping at their heels.

Then Zayn left right in the middle of a world tour and all hell broke loose.

Here comes the biggest Assumption Affair!

Louis and Liam, the last to release their solo debut albums, were the most prominent songwriters for the band. I’m not going to go on about Liam because I’m here to give you Larry Stylinson. And this is already way too long as it is. But, needless to say, the first discussion of a prospective solo career probably hit them the hardest.

If each song they wrote was a battle scar, Louis was still bleeding for the band when Harry, of all people, brought up the idea of a hiatus and solo careers. Realizing how many songs Harry already had waiting in the back catalogue must’ve felt like a slap in the face. Or a punch in the gut. Whichever you think is worse/more dramatic. I’m not picky.

Remember self-destruction as coping mechanism? What about relationship-destruction as coping mechanism? Louis cheated and had a baby with someone else. Infidelity at its finest.

ALERT! THIS IS A NEON SIGN OF ASSUMPTION AFFAIR! Please don’t kill me. I told you I was gonna make unflattering assumptions toward your favorite people. I just did as I promised!!! *run for cover*

Anyway...

I’m gonna take you back a little. I mentioned earlier how Eleanor was a private citizen and therefore should be left alone. At times when Louis desperately needed to be left alone, Elounor makes so much sense. If she’s a PR-only girlfriend, she’s a stellar employee. If it’s not just a PR thing, she’s as forgiving as a saint. Just, if it’s Harry and Louis, they likely both messed up and hurt each other badly. If it’s Louis and Eleanor,... I mean... Have you seen a meme where you misspell a word so badly that the autocorrect goes, ‘I don’t know what to tell you, man’?... Louis would be that misspelled word and Eleanor would be the very best autocorrect that practically brute force through every word in the Oxford AND Urban dictionary to find out what that word was. If that’s who she is, then bless her soul. However, for the sake of this argument, we will proceed with the assumption that she’s the star employee of the decade.

Losing loved ones and grieving for them are inevitable parts of human lives. Nothing put more things into perspectives than losing someone so fundamentally dear to you. When I heard Louis Tomlinson’s ‘Two of Us’ for the first time, I remembered walking through an actual forest my grandpa planted for us because he wanted to make sure his great grandkids would have a nice home to grow up in. Do you remember when you called and told me that he died the night I got on my first solo international flight ten months after the fact? I wanted to hate you for keeping something this big a secret from me. I wanted to hate everybody at home for that. But then you told me that it was what my grandpa had wanted. That he didn’t want me to be a sad sack of an exchange student. That you decided to not listen to my parents and call to tell me just before I was due home. So that I’d have time to feel hurt about being lied to. So that I could get all the angry words out. So that I wouldn’t scream at my parents when I got home and learnt the truth. So that you could take the brunt of my grief instead.

I just took a break to have a little cry. Where was I? Oh, yeah. You did the best you could for me when I lost my grandpa. I still managed to effectively shut you out for months. Just because you were the messenger of the bad news. What I’m trying to say is that grief changes people. It changed me. For the worst for a bit. And then for the better once I came to term with what it means to me. There’s a quote from Rosamund Lupton that sums it up neatly.

“Grief is love turned into an eternal missing.”

I guess this is the part where I connected the dots back to Harry and Louis. Well, their music definitely give grief different names. Both albums talk about coming to term with it and moving forward. Every songs they wrote could be woven to fit the narrative of Larry Stylinson and events surrounding them. If you buy the theory, then the good news is both Fine Line & Walls seemed to have a positive ending. One thing I know for sure, though, is that no matter how convincing a conspiracy theory maybe, it could all be built upon a faulty assumption. I’d probably have a way easier time disregarding Elouner if I didn’t have you as a solid proof in my life that, yes, people like the best autocorrect exists. It’s funny how I feel no hesitation at all in categorizing Haylor as a calculated move. Because in my head that’s just par for the course in business. And it genuinely terrifies me in a way. Who the hell I could’ve become if it weren’t for you knocking me off the ground and pouring kindness on me.

I know I skipped a lot of stuff. Missing names like Caroline, Danielle, Kendall, Freddie, Camille, Xander, etc. But HS and LT have a decade of history on public record and, frankly, my interest ran out four paragraphs ago. So just let me conclude this.

I think it’s tiring, spending this much time speculating on someone else’s relationship history. I must admit that I had to get it out of my chest because it was way too interesting to let go off. But now, I feel like I’m just going to stream Heartbreak Weather and listen to ‘No Judgement’ on repeat. Nile is my favorite non-problematic celebrity. I could spell his name so wrong and it probably won’t be an issue as long as I politely say, “Sorry, Mr Niall Horan”

This quarantine clearly leaves me with too much time on my hands.

Virtual hugs and kisses

Your Incredible Sasha 😘

#larry stylinson #haylor #elounor #aimh theory #larry #i hope you like this #in this essay i will...

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