#since someone else beat the finalist

[rin-the-shadow]

I have a sneaking suspicion that the winner of the Joker Sexyman Competition will ultimately be the one that the voters think would be funniest to have win.

Why?

Because it's a Joker poll.

[toasted-valentine]

Even more Adamandi Things That Got Me Feral

Fair warning, a lot of this is me speculating and nerding out about stage craft, I’ve work set crew for three shows and used to perform when I was younger, so stuff like this scratches my brain in all the right spots. I had to quit cause the new director in my school had the habit of throwing objects at student’s heads when angry. I love theater, wish I could’ve done it more, but I was not willing to risk my own safety for that man. More than one person got hurt, and I took that as a sign to exist stage left.

I’m gonna refer to the actors outside their characters with gender neutral pronouns because I don’t know any of their pronouns, except Vincent’s actor since I follow his Instagram for his art. Dudes got a really cool digital painting style.

•Beatrix mimics The Admin’s hand motions at the end of Read All About It, visually showing how they’re just mimicking what Admin wants, even being a bit freaked out from it. They stumble after The Admin leaves, and look around a tad dazed. These aren’t Beatrix’s own desires, she’s just as much of a puppet as anyone else at Ardess.

•Vincent’s costume patterns clash against each other, stripes, pentagons, and plaid making him stand out. Vincent’s clothing doesn’t even fit in, fighting against itself.

•Vincent’s attempts to join the crowd in Word To The Wise are off sink and off beat, they’re literally being pushed out by the rest.

•Beatrix’s hand movements within Me, Myself, and I cue the others to start singing at the end, a visualization of her pulling the strings. They’re the last one to start singing the “Me, Myself, and I” line when all three groups join in together.

•Vincent completely misses that he could’ve just become a painter, that they’re good at that, and it goes right over their head in Student Body. Like, yes bitch, “as natural as painting” you’re already good at something, don’t gotta go the extra homicidal mile.

•Vincent changes costumes several times within the show and it visually shows his progress into becoming Ambrose. They start not wearing a jacket when freshly in New England, then the long jacket makes him stand out against the rest of the cast so he doesn’t fit in, the yellow cardigan is what Ambrose was wearing at the beginning during Word To The Wise showing Vincent wants to be the Ambrose he remembers from freshman year, later becoming Senior Bassford with the letterman and lashing out to try and bash Beatrix’s head in like Ambrose tried to do to him, and finally settling on no jacket when he’s in his most complete and satisfied form in death.

•Quincy asks if Vincent would kill them, questioning what happens when it’s just the two left, and Vincent holds true that they’d never hurt Quincy. Admin does end up deciding that Vincent wins between the finalist, and Quincy kills Vincent. Vincent keeps to his promise, but Quincy never considers their own potential danger to Vincent in that moment.

•The fact Quincy is too tall to kiss Vincent when standing up, so the actors have to hug when standing, and can only kiss when sitting. It’s so fucking funny to me, cause it would’ve been too awkward a visual to have Quincy’s actor bend down to kiss Vincent’s actor, and due to the height difference they couldn’t do the same staging trick done with Beatrix and Portia’s kiss. The theater kid in me finds this hilarious.

•The red string Beatrix used to remember the lie to Vincent is longer than the rest, allowing the audience to have a constant visual reminder of what Beatrix did. The rest are blue and short, so it’s visually distinct, the bright shade helps it be seen from the seats.

•The actor for Beatrix does a fuck ton of really good visual storytelling, round of applause to them, I like the little bit when they start wrapping the string around their fingers when Portia starts asking about Ambrose’s death and it potentially being motivated by someone wanting to off the other nominees. They do it multiple times, and it’s a great way of showing where the character’s mind is at without saying anything out loud. Plus the little horrified reactions they have during Read All About it, little hesitations throughout the entire show are a nice touch of making it clear the character isn’t very sure about their actions.

•Vincent flipping the typewriter around to face the audience during Oh, Miss Reporter!, showing that he’s imagining the interview and desires one, but can’t really have one due to the nature of his crimes.

•The “fill the fake cigarette with flour” trick to make it look like Beatrix is smoking, really old trick, but such a fun one. When the actor blows into it the flour puffs out, making it look like smoke. I’ve done it a few times in the past for a show my sophomore year, could only do it once tho since we didn’t have time to refill it, so it was up to the actor to decide when it was appropriate to take the puff.

•Roswell hands Beatrix the key to the prize section in Word To The Wise, shoving them out of sight out of mind, and they keep the key on until the end. Roswell and co also give them the jacket and hat. All of it is removed at the end, having them in their best when out of Ardess society.

•You can see how fast each character assimilated based on how long it takes for them to get in step with the ensemble during Word To The Wise, Ambrose first, then Beatrix, then Quincy, and Vincent never manages to join the rest.

•The red strings are taped to the desk, it gives the actor for Beatrix ease to grab it, and there’s multiple incase one falls and they need to grab a new one fast. Plus, good visual storytelling for certain moments, the reminder of what they did is constantly following.

•Quincy gets annoyed when their race is brought up during their interview with Beatrix, and Beatrix doesn’t push any further when told to stop. It’s a nice bit of just clown to clown communication, Beatrix just getting why Quincy wouldn’t want to discuss it any further.

•During Vincent’s interview with Beatrix you can see them getting distracted by everything around them, and in one of the takes he starts carving something into the table. Nice little detail of Vincent having wanted to be a visual artist, but he couldn’t due to his family. They actually starts carving when they brings that fact up.

•The bag that Vincent carries has the different props they need for act one, the scalpel, magnifying glass, and notebook. He takes the magnifying glass during his interview and returns it later in order to bribe Beatrix, whips the scalpel out later on during the Ambrose fight, and is writing in the notebook during the first act. The props are too big to carry in pockets, so the bag is a good way of getting around it. It makes sense character wise, and helps avoid the actor having to rush to find a prop on stage or it having to be positioned within reach of someone.

•During Where Can I Run, Beatrix is following Vincent with a notepad and pencil, nice little show that she’s still interviewing them. Show don’t tell, it tells the audience that he’s still in the interview, but they don’t have to stop to establish what’s happening so they can stay on track for the song.

•When Vincent and Beatrix are smoking on the roof, Vincent’s actor knocks two of the candles over, and you can see him trying to put the candles back in place while faking smoking to make it less noticeable.

•If I were to take a guess, some of the close up shots were done during dress rehearsals so the person recording wouldn’t have to work around an audience and could get better shots, so you can see the costumes change slightly in the recording. It’s a few small things like Beatrix’s actor losing the lapel that they have on during The One Who Pulls The Strings and the tags not having been cut off their gloves at that point. For most of the show they don’t have the tags or lapel, it’s just most noticeable during The One Who Pulls The Strings. If I were to take a shot in the dark, the costume designer bought the gloves that day for the dress rehearsal, but didn’t have time to tie the strings on or cut the tags off.

•Ambrose calls Vincent by his name right before Sound Body Sound Mind, but later on stumbles over calling him Vincent, he stutters halfway through then corrects to calling them Lin. Ambrose remembers Vincent telling him not to call them Vincent, and Ambrose listens when talking to his girlfriend.

•Ambrose’s jacket has multiple A’s on it, he’s obsessed with Ardess’ culture, and has it plastered all over. The other Marmorius member in a letterman also has multiple A’s.

•Vincent being a little shit by silently reading his notebook the first time he’s asked to read it by the Marmorius. That’s just funny.

•Most of Ambrose’s songs are sung in lower notes, but higher ones for I Love You I Swear, even in his songs Ambrose is obsessed with not having anything even slightly femme. It’s only when alone and vulnerable that Ambrose sings how he’s actually feelings. His actor deserves a pat on the back for absolutely carrying, they have really good range and pull off an asshole jock character super well. Ambrose’s character would not work as well as it does if the actor wasn’t as charming with it as they are. 10/10 casting, did it perfectly.

•"I guess I’m married to my work? God that’s depressing.” Is the funniest joke in the show, the delivery of the line made me laugh my ass off first time I saw it, and it makes me smile whenever I watch Adamandi.

•Each of the characters have distinct ways of sitting, which is such a nice way to add personality. You can see these in the different interview scenes, and Beatrix’s conversation with Vincent in the first act.

-Ambrose is lax, seems generally uninterested, he keeps leaning back to avoid making eye contact, and whenever he does look at Beatrix it’s while doing a jackass hand lean.

-Beatrix sits in the gayest way humanly possible during her discussion with Vincent, taking her jacket off and being more casual than she was during the interviews. You can also see them stress smoking throughout the show, during Word To The Wise, when discussing the previous winners with Vincent, when talking about work and Portia with Vincent on the roof, and when trying to convince Portia to not report Vincent for the murders.

-Vincent puts their feet up on the table and Beatrix has to shoo them off, along with that, Vincent continually gets distracted by different objects. He’s not super interested in the interview, just wanting to get it over with fast.

-Quincy tries to keep focused on Beatrix, but keeps flickering their gaze elsewhere nervously, and fidgets with their hands in their lap.

-Portia is the only one whose completely focused on Beatrix instead of having her mind wander someone else. Occasionally she gets shy and will avert her gaze because she catches herself staring at Beatrix, gay panic ensues lol

•The candles are electric, most likely someone backstage has a remote to them, and they flicker in different ways to emphasize different things. It’s such a fun little detail, and whoever was doing it probably had a lot of fun fiddling with the flames. Such a funky little thing. You can see it a lot in Litany of the Martyrs.

•There’s a fucking A on Ambrose’s sweater under his jacket, he’s such a self obsessed jackass, love that lol

•During Me, Myself, and I, when Beatrix is doing their weird little pose while distracted, the way their hands are positioned makes the red string on the side of Vincent and the Marmorius.

•At the beginning of Read All About It, the way Beatrix’s actor lifts the newspaper allows them to wave the newspaper, but also keeps the red string in direct sight of the audience.

•Beatrix takes up Vincent’s green color in the end, their new jacket being a foresty green, I like to think it’s cause they don’t wanna forget him.

•Portia doesn’t get her Ardess jacket until she’s joined the prize section and Beatrix starts teaching her via the mock interview, she has a click to be apart of so fits in. The pink color keeps her visually distinct, most of the other cast wear more earthy or cool tones, a lot of blues, browns, yellows, greens, and grays. Portia’s make her stand out as a more good natured character in comparison. Even the A on her jacket is in a different style, she’s taking advantage of Ardess, but isn’t apart of the culture.

•After the Marmorius die they all gain red trinkets of some kind on their outfit to indicate they’re dead. Ambrose’s is around his neck since Vincent slit his throat. They’re all made out of a shiny material that the lights catch on and make stand out.

•The desk that is brought out in the second act for when Beatrix and Portia are talking has red strings falling out of one of the drawers, Beatrix is running out of space to tie it to on their hands, so it’s just spilling out onto other things.

•Vincent’s bag has a bunch of little sketches on it, some eyes and a few rats are what I could make out, really nice visual that Vincent is an artist. Makes you think “What if he’d just been an artist?” since that probably would’ve fixed a lot of their issues of feeling unfulfilled and like an outcast.

•Portia’s bag has an eye design on it, even tho she’s not fully apart of Ardess culture, she’s still feeling the pressure of being watched.

•When Beatrix and Portia’s actors are exiting the stage after the Vincent pyre scene, you can see Beatrix’s actor begin to fucking book it back stage when the lights go down and they don’t think the audience can see. They need to switch costume really fast and get into position on the scaffolding, so gotta go fast. The hat is actually different, the old one is left with their jacket on the chair in the prize section set, the new one has a different colored ribbon. Old hat’s ribbon was green with a bow, new one is black with no bow.

•I just fucking noticed that the eyepatch Vincent wears in The Other Side Of Failure has the shape of a heart on it. That’s so fucked up.

[lastblues]

decimate that little bitch. — dodge from ray

@anxietytold / ray hall. ★ meme.

          TO SAY THAT THEIR RELATIONSHIP HAS EVOLVED WOULD BE A SEVERE UNDERSTATEMENT.  before dodge even met ray he'd decided to kill him. luke hall--- at least, as far as dodge knew at the time--- had taken dayna's life from her, and he was planning to do the same to his brother. since then a lot has changed. it had been proven that luke had nothing to do with dayna's accident. dayna had laid into him about how her life had never been stolen because the life that was taken never happened. ray's had. panic was over. most importantly, ray had saved dodge from making an irreversible mistake. at the time dodge had been furious, but after it was all over he couldn't stop thinking about what ray said to him on the boat. the bad news is, at about 12:20 you're going to have to find somebody else to hate.

           hate was fucking exhausting. for a year, almost all dodge had done was hate. he'd marinated in it, let it soak him down to the bone, and it was so hard to shake off even once the man who'd caused his family so much pain was gone. dodge didn't want to find someone else to hate. he wanted to be able to release the pressure in his chest and finally enjoy being a nineteen year old. he thought all the time about how he and dayna used to just run and play and enjoy life, and he's realized that what he missed the most was when life felt good. surely he could get that back.

          he did what he said he was going to do. he left carp on his motorcycle, drove around, and just spent time trying to figure himself out. by the time he came back a few months later to visit his mom and dayna and compete in a local rodeo competition, he was different. lighter. now it's easier to make him laugh, and he finds ray to actually be really funny. the thing about ray is that when he's being serious you know it, and almost everything else is just... to make life fun. ray understood dodge better than dodge had understood himself during panic and was (and this sounds crazy) more emotionally mature than dodge was. that was a weird thing to come to terms with. but ray had been dealing with hurt and hate his whole life and he knew how to at least pass the time until it faded. dodge thinks he would have benefitted from being friends with ray sooner, but there was no way for that to have happened.

          they feel like friends now, or at least something like it. dodge smiles when he sees ray. since he came home they've had a few beers, had a long talk to catch up, and dodge had even told ray about the competition he was in town for. to dodge's surprise, ray actually showed up. 

          ray's version of a pep talk, as it turns out, is to put one hand on dodge's cheek and the other on his shoulder and say, "decimate that little bitch." this earns an immediate laugh from dodge--- a bright, warm laugh, like the statement really broke through whatever was left of the walls he'd spent a year building around his heart--- and he rolls his eyes, reaching up to grab the wrist of the hand that's on his cheek. "alright, alright." he pulls ray's hand down, but his fingers linger on the man's wrist as he turns his head over his shoulder to see the other finalist's time. "if i beat his time by at least five seconds, what does that get me?"

[ptergwen]

from one kid to another

w/c: 6.0k

warnings: mentions of drinking, lots of swearing, implied smut, and angst at times

summary: it was a mistake, a beautiful one that you didn’t make on your own

a/n: this genuinely is my favorite thing i’ve ever written :,) i say that a lot but this time i mean it, it’s really special i think and i so so so hope y’all do too <3 enjoy my loves

-

there’s only one thing in life that testing positive for is actually positive.

depending on the situation, obviously. yours isn’t ideal, or planned or a blessing or whatever people say. it’s a gigantic mistake that you didn’t realize you made until a minute ago.

you’d noticed something was wrong when your time of the month came and all you experienced was the symptoms. cramps, cravings, everything except your actual period. as everyone is pretty much taught to do, you ran to the closest drug store for a pregnancy test. what the hell else could it be? you messed around a few weeks ago, so there’s a possibility.

your heart felt like it was going to explode out of your chest the whole time you waited for the results. you’d thought of calling tom over for support, but there are a couple of reasons why you couldn’t do that. you realized you made the right decision when your timer for the test went off.

two red lines. you’re pregnant. you’re pregnant, and your best fucking friend is the father.

where do you go from here?

the test falls from your hand and hits the floor with a mocking clank. you slide down until your back is against the bathtub. well, you’re fucked. what an ironic word choice.

the fact that you aren’t ready in the slightest to be a parent when you’re still growing up yourself is one thing. it’s another that this could ruin the most important relationship you’ve ever had.

no, tom won’t be mad. he’s never once fought with or even raised his voice at you. in your times of need, he’s been the one to uplift you and kiss your puffy cheeks dry. no matter how he takes this, you know it won’t be out on you. he is half responsible.

but, with how you left things the last time you spoke, you’re not sure you’ll be able to get past it.

tom is alarmingly good at hiding how he truly feels. you always tease him that it’s because he’s a gemini. he’ll come back with shut up, i’m an actor and stick his nose in the air to give you the full image. in all seriousness, it does take a toll on how well he can communicate.

you’ve seen it in small ways, like when he brings you along for press days and uses unenthusiastic smiles to cover up his yawns. how he’ll be polite in a conversation with people he’d rather not speak to, then mumble about it once you’re home. he tries to put forward the “appealing” parts of himself even though he’s more than them.

tom’s biggest communication issue is that he’s been in love with you since year nine and hasn’t said a word about it. you’ve yet to figure that one out.

you two became friends while tom was starring in billy elliot. his schedule was so scattered between shows and school, so he struggled to balance both. he often had to stay late for extra help on the lessons. you’d also been there a few times. you worked better in the classroom, and he was grateful he didn’t have to be alone with the teacher.

most kids made fun of tom for his interest in theater, to his face and behind his back. not you. you thought it was just incredible that someone in your own classes worked at the west end. you’d told him on your way home one night.

he’d heard you before he saw you. “you’re tom, right?” you asked from behind him, the two of you making your way through the hall. the question sounded friendly, and it wasn’t every day kids were nice to him. tom stopped walking so you could catch up. “yes, and you are?” you gave him a small smile, books clutched to your chest. he instantly returned it.

“y/n. i heard you’re in billy elliot?” you laughed at your understatement, then corrected yourself. “that you are billy elliot, i mean. that’s so cool.” “oh, i am. thank you,” he chuckled back, a full grin taking over his face. you were both walking again, you by tom’s side. “i was hoping to come see you soon.” your voice got quieter as you told him, like you were nervous.

tom never had much luck with girls, not at this point in his life. this was an opportunity to change that. at the very least, to make a new friend. he offered something you said yes to without a beat of hesitation. “what if i got you the tickets?”

from then on, you began talking during class and not only when it ended. tom really knew how to keep the conversation going, telling story after story that left you laughing so much your teacher would shush you. you’d eventually moved to hangouts at either of your houses. harrison came into the mix at some point, the three of you forming your own group.

the difference between tom and harrison was that while harrison linked with other girls, tom was only interested in you. he’d gotten a crush on you pretty fast, if he was being honest. it might have been your shared sense of humor or the way you said his name.

thomas, when he was being cheeky. tommy, which took the place of a pet name. even regular tom. that might have been his favorite. he loved how it rolled off your tongue. he loved, and still loves, you.

you’d gone to all of tom’s performances you possibly could, the ones for school theater included. you also gave him the push to take his talents to hollywood. tom was afraid he wasn’t cut out for the big screen, that he needed more practice and experience first. you told him that if this was what he wanted to do, he had to start somewhere. why wait?

tom then landed his first movie role in the impossible at the age of fifteen. he’d received tons of praise and almost gotten nominated for an academy award, all because you convinced him to audition. you played a huge part in keeping him grounded when he was between films, and caught him up on whatever schoolwork he’d missed.

you practically zoomed to tom’s house when he was announced as the next spider-man. you’d been constantly refreshing every social media platform marvel was on since tom became a finalist for the part. that process was probably the most difficult experience he’s ever gone through. you’d know, having heard all about it from tom.

the two of you celebrated along with the rest of tom’s family that night. you kept giving him little proud of you squeezes on his shoulder or knee. tom is eternally indebted to you for being the most supportive of everything he does.

he of course sends the support right back. although he went down the movie star path, acting wasn’t for you. you’d gone off to university and studied hard as hell and aced all your shit. tom quizzed you on material whenever you needed. he wanted to help you somehow, and this was all you’d let him do.

he’d offered to pay off your loans and any other expenses necessary because he had the money to do that now. you refused every single time, not trying to become dependent on him. he admired your drive, yet hated it at the same time. everything you’d done for him, it was his turn to be the caretaker. it should’ve been.

whenever tom wrapped filming for the holidays and came back home, you were always preparing for final exams. he kept you company, content with simply being in your presence. you typed away on your keyboard and read over notes until your eyes burned. tom occasionally brought you snacks, tea, asked how you were and what he could do.

sometimes, he would have to cut your study time short. he’d say it wasn’t healthy or you were overdoing it and to come relax with him for a bit. other times, tom let you be. he didn’t want to get in the way of your already stressful assignments. those were the nights you’d fall asleep in front of your laptop. drool on your chin, hunched over at your desk.

tom made sure to tuck you in, press a light kiss to whatever part of your face wasn’t covered in spit, then let himself out. he knew where your spare key was, so he used that. you’d wake up to a “Fell asleep studying again. Rest today x” text the next morning.

when it came time for you to graduate, tom was on the first flight there. it was during another round of reshoots for chaos walking. he respectfully told doug that he’d have to work around his schedule or replace him, which couldn’t be done so late into filming. tom didn’t care that it made him seem like a prick. he was getting to you no matter what he had to do.

he’d earned plenty of stares and whispers from people as he took his seat in the crowd. he was a proper celebrity now, so he expected it. his solution was to ignore everything and chat with your family about how proud they were of you, tom the most. he saw you go from a kid attempting algebra equations to an adult at her uni graduation. you’ve really grown up together.

it was why he teared up hearing them call your name, seeing you beam as you walked across the stage. your mom grabbed his hand and nodded at him, like she could tell exactly what was going through his head.

you ran right up to tom after the ceremony was over, leaping into his arms. he let out a couple of chuckles as he spun you around. “i didn’t think you’d make it,” you’d admitted, happy yet sad tears in your eyes. tom put you down so he could pull you in for a real hug. “i’ll always be wherever you are, y/n,” he said into your ear, rocking you while you gripped at his suit collar.

flash forward to a year later, your career is finally taking off, tom’s is flourishing like it has been for years, and you’re pregnant with his child. you’re trying to recall the series of events that led you to this moment.

you were both drunk, blackout drunk because the only reason you remember sleeping together is that you woke up naked in the same bed. harrison’s bed.

he threw a housewarming party for himself, having recently moved out of tom’s and the other boys’ place. the three of them, sam, and you were all in attendance, along with a lot of others you hadn’t met.

neither you nor tom could figure out where he knew all those people from. he’d clinged to you two for the most part, more so you now with tom usually away. they could have been from work. harrison is breaking into the business himself, small roles here and there. tom actually met him in your school’s theater program, then he introduced him to you, ten years ago already.

sam entertained himself by making concoctions with the snacks harrison set out. harry got together a playlist for the party. harrison and tuwaine struck up a conversation with some of harrison’s actor friends. that left you and tom alone, out of stuff to do, and with one way to fix it.

“drink?” tom had asked you, a smirk playing on his lips. “love one,” you hummed back and set off for the kitchen. the two of you raided harrison’s liquor cabinet, grabbing his biggest bottle of wine. he’d dumbly pointed it out during the house tour he gave you before the other guests arrived.

you were about to search for glasses, but tom’s fingers threaded through yours. he gently tugged you away and nodded behind him. “let’s bring this upstairs. seems much more fun there,” he’d murmured over the music, a grin breaking across your face.

tom is big on clubbing and socializing, however, you aren’t. he comes up with ways to get you out of these events, just in case.

“we can break in harrison’s bed for him,” you said as a completely harmless joke, no intentions of that becoming your reality later on. spoiler alert: it did. “and how are we gonna do that?” tom quirked a suggestive eyebrow and breathed out a laugh as you dragged him towards the stairs. despite yourself, you’d giggled at his words.

not one drink in either of you yet, and you were stumbling and cracking up as you ran upstairs. you’d pulled tom by your still attached hands into what you remembered as harrison’s room. tom shut the door, locked it, saying under his breath that would be a “convenient investment” for him to make as well.

he took out a bottle opener that he must have put in his pocket at some point and got to work on your wine, you getting comfortable on the new mattress. the two of you passed it to the other after every sip, tom licking the taste of your lip gloss off his own lips every so often.

the equivalent of three drinks in, you were making out. both of you were just tipsy at this point, tom holding you by your hips as you lied down, your legs around his waist. god, he could’ve done this sober. he’d dreamed about kissing you, really kissing you since he was fourteen. you’d always felt like you two had something more. ah, there it was.

halfway through the bottle got you past the next two bases, and you were ready for the fourth and ultimate one by the time you shook the last few drops onto the tip of your tongue. tom groaned at the sight of that, drawing your half naked body in closer to his.

you two had forgotten to use protection in each of your drunken states. without a doubt, you both would’ve agreed to a condom had your minds not been everywhere but where they should have.

you’d woken up first the morning after, panic immediately coursing through your veins thicker than blood. a fully nude and sleeping tom had you in his embrace, arms secured around your middle, facing you. you gasped when you made the connection, loudly enough to wake tom up. his long eyelashes tickled your face, a confused pout on his lips. uh... um...

“did we fucking...” you trailed off, no words to describe whatever unfolded. “fuck?” tom finished for you. a very blunt explanation, but true nevertheless. “looks like it,” he rasped, pout changing into a smile. your face fell at the vague memories of how you spent your night.

you definitely wanted to do it. just, he’s your best friend, who’s seen you at your least sexy moments over the years. when you were sick, had breakdowns from stress, you name literally anything, tom was there. it took one bottle of cheap wine for him to forget that?

the real answer was no. tom is entirely in love with you, for a decade at that. you were beginning to discover you feel the same, only you had no idea he already loves you. you’d assumed this was meant to be merely a hookup. from the frown your face held, he’d thought you were regretting it. oh, were you both so wrong.

“um... we don’t have to talk about it,” tom told you halfheartedly, under the impression that’s what you preferred. you physically felt yourself get weaker in tom’s strong arms. he’s not interested. “yeah, that’s probably for the best. i...” you were lying. his heart shrunk, shriveled up inside his chest. she doesn’t love me like that.

“you have to go. aren’t you behind on some emails?” tom hoped you didn’t hear his voice strain from the tears pushing at his eyes. “right. almost forgot, thanks.” you’d plastered on a smile, slipping out of his grasp. a tear rolled down his cheek, so he wiped it away before you noticed. you’d already gotten out of the bed and begun picking your clothes up off the floor.

“i’ll drive you home, then.” he rolled on to his other side, you thought so he could give you privacy to change. it was that, and also because he was crying. he couldn’t hold it in. tom is naturally an emotional person. imagine finding out the love you’ve had almost half your life is unreciprocated. it’s soul crushing.

you two found harrison snoring and on top of tuwaine as you left the house. no silly remarks or shared glances for the first time in ten years. tom couldn’t muster anything up, and you felt numb.

the drive was painful. you’d said your goodbyes after tom pulled up to the curb, which held an odd weight to them. once you were out of the car, a sob wracked through him, banging on the steering wheel and not giving a shit about the loud horn going off. you collapsed face first onto your bed. hours passed by while you stared at nothing and contemplated everything.

since it happened, you haven’t spoken much. small talk over text every few days or so, both of you pretending things are normal for the other’s sake. about a month later, today, is when you found out you’re pregnant.

there’s no use wallowing in any of this. you need to figure out your next move, one that should probably involve tom. first, you want to talk to someone else. you want other opinions and a voice in your head that isn’t your own. harrison gets a text from you saying to come over now, the now in all caps. he does.

you let him in after the second knock, his eyebrows furrowing in concern. however torn you are, you must look it. shirt balled in your fists, lip quivering. he keeps his eyes on yours as he steps inside, pushing the door shut behind him. this is all becoming too real. “y/n, are you okay?”

you’re about to cry in three, two...

“haz, i fucked up,” you choke out, tears unable to stay at bay. he takes you into his arms for a hug. half your face is hidden in his shoulder, hands clutching at his back. he lets you cry it out, holding you until your heavy breathing steadies. “what’s happened?” harrison asks quietly, both of you leaving the hug.

“if- if i tell you, you can’t freak out. you can’t tell anyone else, either,” you instruct, searching his eyes for certainty that he won’t under any circumstances. “i won’t, y/n/n,” he assures you and puts an encouraging hand on your arm. your heart pounding abnormally fast, you spit it out. your first time saying it aloud. “i’m pregnant.”

harrison flinches and doesn’t even try to conceal it. he takes his hand off of you, worry swimming across his features. he blinks at you, unsure of what to say. you’d react the same way, maybe worse, so you don’t blame him. a discussion you, him, and tom had a couple years back replays in his mind.

the three of you were talking about your futures, seeing as you were close to living them. when tom asked you two where you stood on having your own families, you didn’t hesitate to answer. “nope, the factory is closed for a long ass time.” until you were in your thirties, you aimed to focus on yourself. harrison distinctly remembered because of how you phrased it.

“you’re... you... wow,” is all he replies with. you head over to the couch, more tears welling up in your eyes. do the pregnancy hormones act up this early? harrison follows you over and sits down next to you with an awkward clearing of his throat. “do you want to be pregnant?” he has to ask because he’s not sure if he should congratulate you or what.

“i don’t know,” you answer honestly, voice airy. your eyes are fixed on the wall in front of you. you haven’t given yourself time to think about it. there are so many reasons you don’t, and a single one you do. “do you, um, know who the dad is?” harrison glances over at you. “yeah.” your voice cracks. you’re both afraid for him to ask what he does next.

he shifts so he’s sitting up. “can i know?” a sniffle passing through you, you finally look at him. “it’s tom,” you say it before you lose the nerve to. harrison’s face doesn’t change this time. he isn’t surprised you and tom went there. he’d seen your friendship growing into more the older you all got. what he can’t believe is where it took you.

his best friend pregnant, and his other best friend responsible for it.

“when did you...” “at your party,” you explain, bringing your legs up so they’re criss cross on the couch. “i thought you were gone a little too long.” he says that to try cheering you up. you appreciate the effort, but it doesn’t work. you’re not in a joking mood. he’ll stick to the main issue. “so, have you told him?”

“clearly not,” you scoff, not at him but at what you two have gotten yourselves into. “y/n... i think you should tell him,” harrison sighs out, then adds, “whether you keep it or not.” “why? that would ruin everything, it already has.” you’re getting angry now, which plunges you into angry crying, voice unsteady as you go on.

“the last time i saw tom was that night, and i guess it meant more to me than it did to him because we haven’t talked about it at all. he didn’t want to.” you swipe the back of your hand across your eyes, gaze stern compared to harrison’s soft one.

he drapes an arm around your shoulders, you curling into him with another sniffle. he doesn’t say anything for a minute, then he tries again. “i know you, y/n, and i know tom. you’ll kill yourselves not talking about this.” he’s right, no shit he is. avoiding telling tom how you feel, and your pregnancy on top of that, it’s eating you up inside. it’s swallowing you whole.

“what if he doesn’t want to be a dad? or- or i’m a shit mum?” you croak out, your doubts getting the best of you. “i can barely take care of myself. what am i supposed to do with a baby?” you’re leaning forward with your hands pressing into your temples. harrison’s hand moves to your upper back. “i- i don’t think i should have them. i... we can’t,” you conclude.

“tom loves kids,” he gives you a gentle reminder. “why would his own be the exception?” another good point, yet you still have rebuttles. “right, he’s a godfather and he’s really good with them and all that, but i’m not the right person, and it’s a terrible time,” you tell him all at once, in a rush to get your words out before harrison’s sway you.

“he’s never around, i’m doing my own stuff. we’re not meant for this.” you lift your head out of your hands and sit back on the couch. harrison returns his hands to his lap. he’s frowning at you, which you see from the corner of your eye. “i’m not going to force you to have the baby. just saying you have options.”

yeah, really shitty ones.

“either way, talk to tom.” harrison says this more like a demand so you’ll take his advice into actual consideration. “at least about the hookup.” your teeth sink into your lower lip, eyes watering for the nth time already.

you have no choice because he’s right again. you’ll never move on from what happened unless you and tom address it.

the next morning, you do what harrison told you to and invite tom over. he replied saying he was on his way maybe a minute later. he’s nervous to see you because yeah, but more so looking forward since it’s been so long. you’re so nauseous you barely have room for nerves. it’s morning sickness with a hint anxiety.

it feels almost normal when he first gets here, no how’ve you been and what are you up to these days? being as close as you and tom are, you’re not capable of such a dry conversation. personally, you still feel uneasy while he recounts a golfing incident him and harry got into the other day. you know something he doesn’t.

“when i tell you we flew, we flew,” tom makes a pushing forward motion with both hands. “right into the tree. i think harry, like, dented part of his face.” he lets out a breathy laugh, you forcing out one of your own. you’d be more interested without the fact that you’re expecting a child, his child, at the back of your mind.

tom exhales, shifting to face you on your couch. it’s funny how different things were when you and harrison sat in these same spots yesterday. so much has and is about to change.

“they had to send another golf cart to come get us. it was wild.” “it sounds wild,” you hollowly agree. he can tell you’re not too invested in hearing about harry’s terrible driving skills, so he changes the subject. “anyway, harrison told me he came over last night?” your stomach drops, heat coming over your whole body.

“did... did he say why?” you murmur with a look of urgency in your eyes. tom shrugs a shoulder, and casually. there’s no way he knows. “no, was he supposed to?” his tone stays playful, which you can thankfully tell. that puts you more at ease. “no. no, never mind. i would’ve asked you to come, but...” you’re searching through your catalog of excuses.

thank god tom says something else because you can’t find a good one. “it’s alright. i actually, um, had a work call.” a small smile spreads across his face, a proud one. intrigued, you raise both eyebrows. “what’d you talk about?” tom twiddles with his fingers in his lap. “i’ve been offered an audition for this really amazing film. everything works out, it’ll be huge for me.”

you’re smiling back this time, putting a hand over one of his. “woah, that’s incredible. i’m so happy for you, tom.” you lock your fingers with his from the back of his hand. he looks down at them, humbly shaking his head. “when is it?” “a few weeks from today. it films in brazil...”

oh. you can’t tell him now. it’s not worth him missing out on a milestone in his career for a baby you’re not sure you should have. that would be so unfair of you to ask. what are you going to do, not support his dreams for the first time in a literal decade? and, you’d call yourself his best friend through it all?

you guess this also means the way you feel about tom is one sided. he’s okay with leaving you after the most intimate moment you two have ever shared. you’ll dance around it the rest of your lives. better yet, act like the night never even happened. that’s not so easy to do when you’ve got a permanent reminder of it.

the thought makes you sick to your stomach. so sick, you could...

while tom is talking more about what the audition entails, you suddenly bolt up from the couch. you run for the bathroom, a hand cupped over your mouth. his face twists up in confusion from your disappearance. tom calls, “y/n/n?” out to you, but you can’t respond because your head is in the toilet. he rushes in when he hears you retching.

he gets onto the floor with you. you’re bent over, puking your guts out, back in another place where your life changed forever less than twenty four hours ago. tom pulls your hair out of your face and into a makeshift ponytail with one hand, his other on your back. that’s all you have in you. you stay over the toilet just to be sure.

saliva drips from your mouth, making you cough roughly, the sound echoing. tom moves so he’s next to you, keeping his hand in your hair and not caring one bit about the smell because he loves you and he’s utterly concerned about what he witnessed.

“love, are you sick?” he coos, searching for your eyes. they water from the intensity of everything. “morning sickness,” you answer without thinking first. shit. shit, shit, shit. it came out of you like more vomit, word vomit. there’s no going back now.

tom lets go of your hair with his eyes still on yours. his hand on your back then leaves you, fingers trailing down your body as they go. “morning sickness,” he repeats, putting it together. “you’re pregnant?” guilt taking over your features, you sit across from tom. you’re once again leaning against the bathtub, him against the counter.

“this isn’t how i wanted you to find out,” you admit and bring your knees up to your chest. “i took a test yesterday. it was positive.” your arms wrap around your legs, you now tearing up because tom figured it out. a shaky breath passes his lips. “i haven’t gone to my doctor or anything yet, but i-“

“are you keeping the baby?” tom cuts in. not to judge you for your choice, to find out what the fuck is going on before he travels across the world. you tighten your arms around yourself, grabbing your wrist. “i haven’t decided.” he gives you an understanding nod and reaches out for you. you dodge him. he might not want to do that after what you say next.

“tom, i... there’s more,” you whimper out. “yeah. i’m... i’m listening,” tom croaks, unable to hold in his infinite amount of emotions for a multitude of reasons. he’s losing you a second time. more tears spill from your eyes as you break the news, the news that will destroy what he’s been working towards his entire life.

“the baby is yours.” his face relaxes, looking almost relieved when you confess it. “when we slept together, uh,” you’re sure it’s obvious enough that you don’t have to go over the details. he’s tearing up himself. you reluctantly continue. “if you still want to audition, i get it. we don’t have to do this.”

“fuck the audition. fuck the whole movie. all of my movies, really,” tom surprises you by blurting out. he moves in until your legs are touching. “i’m staying. even if you don’t have the baby, i have to be here.” you watch in disbelief as he wipes away what are actually happy tears. “really? i was scared you’d resent me for it, or hate me even,” you mumble to him.

“y/n, what? why would i ever do that?” tom places a hand on your cheek, touch gentle and filled with love. you part your legs so he can be closer to you. he takes the space between them, thumb brushing over your skin. “i didn’t think you’d want to deal with all of this. i thought that night was only a hookup for you.” your voice wobbles under his gaze.

“no, are you kidding? i thought that’s what you thought.” he’s smiling now, eyes twinkling along with it. what he’s been meaning to tell you since you were only kids finally comes out. “i’ve loved you as long as i’ve known you, y/n. i always imagined myself doing this with you.” his words draw a quiet laugh from you, a happy one. “i know we were drunk, but i meant it all.”

the sincerity in his voice, the warmth in his eyes, they make you cry all over again. you’re getting used to it.

“i love you, tom,” you lean into him with a sniffle and a grin, his forehead now resting on yours, using his thumb to catch one of your tears. “i really do.” “i love you forever. i always have,” tom speaks lowly, breath fanning across your face. your hands grab at his shoulders. “so, you’ll stay? you’ll do this with me?” he reminds you of what he said before, this time a promise.

“forever.”

-

you ended up having the baby, and tom held your hand through the entire labor. nikki was holding his other hand, your mom holding your other hand. harrison had originally been in the room as well. when you started to push, he got freaked out and had to leave. your support system remained strong either way.

despite his repulsion of your daughter’s birth, you and tom decided to make harrison her godfather. he eventually became the godfather of your other two children also, which you had a few years later.

tom took a paternity leave from the industry so he could be with you and jamie. he’d also used his time off to propose to you, something else he fantasized about since year eleven in school. it wasn’t anything too grand because the whole world was already buzzing about you two, and a big gesture felt too impersonal with everything you’d been through together.

he did it in the form of passing a note, something you often did in class to avoid being scolded by your teacher for talking. the note came with a pencil to check off either the yes or no box, “will you marry me?” written above them. anyone else would have found it so unromantic, but you giggled as you checked off yes before your lips crashed into his smiling ones.

you were married shortly after the proposal, jamie as your flower girl and all your friends and family in attendance.

to do what he loved and stay with the people he loved, tom created his own version of hollywood in london. he took it upon himself to assemble a team and make a production company. harry behind the camera, harrison and tuwaine in the films, and tom either starring alongside them or directing. they give so many young actors tons of opportunities.

you eventually went back to work, too. it was like you’d never left, coworkers offering endless hugs and going over what you missed, not that you struggled getting into it. tom was there to celebrate every promotion, every compliment from your boss, every part of your life. jamie was also there, then liam and lucy.

all three of them are running around the house right now, putting on shoes and collecting their supplies for school. you take a sip of the orange juice liam didn’t finish with a lighthearted eye roll. tom chuckles as he passes you in the kitchen, getting the kids’ lunchboxes for them to minimize the chaos.

“you have that pitch meeting today, right?” he slips his hands through the lunchbox handles and walks over to you. “mhm,” you hum, mouth full with juice. his lips press to your temple, giving your waist a one handed squeeze. “you’ll smash it. always do.” “thanks, tommy.” putting down the cup, you reach up to button whatever parts of his shirt he didn’t have time to.

“aren’t you doing a casting? for the new script they sent?” you wonder aloud and smooth down the cotton material. “me and harry. should be interesting,” he remarks, you giving him a quick kiss back on his chin. they tend to have their artistic differences. “good luck with that. you do drop off, i’ll do pick up?” you pat one of the lunchboxes around his arms.

“deal.” tom goes in for a kiss on your lips, then a chorus of dad, we have to go led by jamie rings through the house. with a knowing smile, you push at his chest. “see you later. love you.” “love you, holland,” he bites back a grin of his own. his last name, now yours, suits you perfectly.

[musette22]

Drunk in Boston

Pairing: Chris Evans x Sebastian Stan (Evanstan)

Word count: 2.4k

A/N: A week or so ago, I saw this post. I couldn’t stop thinking about it, so I decided to write a ficlet, a little Evanstan AU. It’s a bit late maybe, since Christmas has already been and gone, but it’s still technically the holidays so just indulge me? :p 

Also, I hit 3k followers this week, so this is also a sort of thank you to all you amazing, wonderful, beautiful people for getting me here. Love you all as much as I love these boys as much as they love each other 💘 Hope you enjoy!

❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️

It’s 3 p.m. on 17 December, and Chris is a little bit drunk. Maybe even a lotta bit.

In his defense, he is currently in Boston for a bachelor party and they did just do a tour of the Samuel Adams Brewery. It’s not like he makes a habit of daytime drinking. Not this much, anyway.

Chris stumbles out of the bar that’s attached to the brewery, surrounded by a dozen or so old school friends, all of whom are in a similar state of inebriation, when they pass the gift shop and a familiar image catches his eye. Chris stops in his tracks. On closer inspection, what he saw turns out to be a photo, displayed in a stand outside the shop, of a park in Concord near where Chris grew up.

No, not a photo.

A postcard.

He plucks the card from the stand, swaying on his feet a little as he peers at it. In the image, the park is covered in snow, much like it would be right now, and stamped across it in a red, gothic font are the words ‘Happy Holidays’.

Instantly, Chris is hit by a wave of nostalgia. No doubt the feeling is heightened by the alcohol – he always tends to get a little sentimental when he’s drunk – but it’s not just that. It’s also the fact that Chris and his friends have been reminiscing about the good old days all afternoon as well as the sudden, depressing realization that despite all he’s achieved in the past decade or so, his happiest memories are probably those of childhood Christmases spent in Concord.

These days, Chris lives in on the West Coast. He’s kind of a superstar now, after all, and superstars live in LA – everybody knows that. Chris doesn’t usually let himself dwell too much on how lonely he is there, or how he misses the comforting accents and the real winters of the East Coast. Tonight, though, whether because of the booze in his system or the ghosts of Christmas past, he allows himself to feel the stab of homesickness.

Without conscious input from his brain, Chris finds himself buying the postcard. When the cashier asks him if he’ll be needing he stamp, too, he hesitates. “Yeah, why not,” he decides, on a whim. It’s a Christmas card, after all, and Christmas cards are supposed to be sent.

There’s just one slight issue with his plan, Chris realizes as soon as he puts the borrowed pen to the card.

He’ll need an address to send the card to.

Frowning, he taps the pen against the counter, thinking as hard as his beer-addled brain will allow him, but the only address he can think of off the top of his head is that of his childhood home, back in Concord. But… that would be weird, right? He has no idea who’s been living there, since his parents sold the house after the divorce. Then again, Chris tells himself, this could be his good Christmas deed. Sending a postcard to a total stranger just to wish them happy holidays, that’s totally in the Christmas spirit, isn’t it?

With a decisive nod of his head, Chris puts his pen to paper and starts to write. It’s just a few lines, because there’s only so much you can say to a total stranger, but when he signs off with his initials, he feels good about it. He asks the cashier for the nearest post box, which happens to be just outside the building, so he thanks the guy and heads outside.

Pulling his pea coat tighter around him against the glacial December air, Chris spares the card one last look, and drops into the post box. It feels significant, somehow.

He doesn’t get time to dwell on it though, because the moment his friends spot him, he’s immediately and enthusiastically subsumed back into the group and dragged on to the next boozy destination.

Three drinks on, Chris has forgotten all about the postcard.

***

On the morning of 18 December, Sebastian Stan opens his postbox to find a postcard with a photo of the park near his house on the front, and a hastily scribbled message on the back:

Hey,

I used to live in your house.

I’m drunk in Boston, and it’s the only address I know.

Happy Holidays,

C.E.

Even after re-reading the message three times, Sebastian is none the wiser as to who sent it.

It makes sense other people used to live in the house Sebastian’s been renting, but unsurprisingly, he has no clue who they were. It was only last year that he’d decided to relocate from New York to Concord, craving a change of pace and more peace and quiet than the Big Apple had been able to offer. He’d visited Concord on a research trip for his third novel the year before and had immediately taken a liking to it. So when, after asking his estate agent to put out some feelers in the area, the guy had found him this beautiful place to rent within a day, Sebastian had taken it as a sign.

It’s a big old house – more appropriate for a family than a man living alone, perhaps – but Sebastian can afford it, and it has a lived-in vibe that makes it feel intimate, somehow. Its location on the edge of a large park, peaceful apart from the joggers and young families that frequent it, suits his needs perfectly, too. Despite being a successful author, Sebastian prefers to keep himself to himself. He’s not one for ostentatious book tours or photoshoots, doesn’t believe in social media beyond its promotional potential, and he’s found that he blends in perfectly in this picturesque little town.

In addition to being a private person, however, Sebastian is an inherently curious one.

It’s why he became a writer in the first place, and it’s also why the random, slightly mysterious postcard instantly fascinates him. Someone who decides to send a Christmas card to the stranger living in their childhood home has got to be an interesting person, Sebastian figures.

Unable to resist the temptation, he finds the landlord’s number and presses call.

“The initials C.E.?”

“C.E., that’s right,” Sebastian repeats patiently. “I received a postcard from someone with those initials who said they used to live in this house and wished me Happy Holidays. I’d like to thank them for the card, maybe tell them they’re free to come by the house anytime, if that’s something they’d like.”

“Well,” the landlord says, clear hesitation in his tone. “I wouldn’t usually give out this kind of information, especially not about this particular person. But seeing as he approached you first, I guess it should be alright…”

Chris Evans.

Famous Hollywood actor Chris Evans used to live in Sebastian’s house. The house he’s renting. Whatever.

The point is, Chris Evans sent him a postcard. Sebastian would be lying if he said that knowledge didn’t make his heart beat a little faster. He isn’t one to get star-struck, normally, knowing full well the rich and famous are people just like anyone else, only with an added layer of expensive, sparkly veneer.

Chris Evans, though. Well, let’s just say Chris’s blue eyes, his dazzling smile, and his chest – god, that chest – had helped along Sebastian’s gay awakening considerably, all those years ago.

So even though he realizes what he’s about to do could be considered slightly unethical, the next number Sebastian dials is that of his agent. There’s no harm in asking if there’s any chance she could use her industry connections to pass on a message to Chris Evans, surely?

“Chris Evans?” his agent repeats blankly. “The British radio DJ or the actor?”

Sebastian huffs out a laugh. “Actor. Definitely the actor. Why would I want to send a message to a British radio DJ?”

“Why would you want to send a message to the actor?” she shoots back. “Apart from the obvious, of course.” 

Touché.

Once he’s explained the situation to her, his agent hums thoughtfully. “Alright, I’ll admit that’s pretty amazing,” she says. “As it happens, I know someone at CAA who owes me a favor. I’ll see what I can do.”

Sebastian thanks her warmly, and then he waits.

***

That afternoon, Chris gets a phone call from his agent.

“Thank you for the postcard,” she reads aloud. “If you're ever in the neighborhood, you’re welcome to stop by the house and have a look around, for old time’s sake. Happy Holidays, Sebastian Stan.”

“Sebastian Stan?” Chris asks, eyebrows shooting up. “The author?”

“Oh, you know him?”

“Well, no. Not exactly. I’ve read one of his books, though, the one that’s shortlisted for the Pulitzer price, I think? He’s very good.”

His agent hums. “If you say so. Do you want me to pass a message back to him?”

Chris opens his mouth to say yes, then closes it again. “Actually,” he says, making a spur-of-the-moment decision, “I’m still in the area so I think I’ll just pay him a visit. Do you think you could you cancel my flight back to LA this afternoon?”

His agent grumbles at him for a bit but eventually concedes, though not before she’s made Chris promise he’ll be back in LA on Tuesday, for the Christmas special he’s due to appear in. Fun.

For a few moments after he’s ended the call, Chris stares out of the window of his hotel room. It’s snowing again, big flakes fluttering down from the sky, slowly turning the grey, slushy roads white again. He wonders if Pulitzer-finalist Sebastian Stan likes to make snow angels in the backyard too, like Chris used to do.

Putting his phone between his shoulder and his ear, Chris starts to put his things in his overnight bag, and calls an Uber.

It’s almost twilight, by the time the cab come to a stop in front of the house. Chris thanks the driver and steps out, booted feet sinking into the freshly fallen snow. It’s piling up quickly, he notices distantly.

It’s odd, being back here, after everything that’s happened since he moved away, so Chris gives himself a moment to just stand there, in the middle of the deserted street, taking in the sight of house he grew up in.

The house that holds countless memories, many of them good, some of them not so much. His first dog and his first kiss. Scraped knees and snowball fights. Raucous laughter and hissed arguments.

The house looks the same but different.

Chris walks up to the front door, snow crunching under his boots, and rings the doorbell.

***

Chris Evans is on Sebastian’s doorstep.

All blue-eyed, bearded, gloriously muscled, six-foot-something of him.

“Uh,” Chris says, blinking at him in something like surprise before his gaze sweeps up and down Sebastian’s body in a blatant once-over. “Sebastian Stan?”

“Oh wow, you actually came,” Sebastian blurts by way of reply.

Chris’s eyes widen. “Oh, I’m sorry, I just thought- ‘cause you said-”  

“No, no, it’s fine,” Sebastian interrupts. “I did say that. I just- I guess I wasn’t expecting you to really turn up – or not this soon, at least. But it’s no trouble at all, I live alone so it’s nice to have a visitor. Especially, y’know. You.” Forcing himself to stop talking, Sebastian runs a hand through his messy hair and wishes he’d worn something better suited to meeting one’s celebrity crush. “Sorry,” he says, smiling sheepishly. “Let’s try that again. Hi, I’m Sebastian Stan.”

“Chris Evans.” Chris smiles back warmly as he shakes Sebastian’s extended hand. “It’s lovely to meet you.”

“Lovely,” Sebastian repeats, holding Chris’s gaze. There are tiny flecks of green mixed in with the blue of his eyes, and his lashes would put any Maybelline model to shame. It takes Sebastian longer than it should to remember to let go of Chris’s hand, but fortunately, Chris doesn’t seem to be in any rush either. Huh. Sebastian clears his throat. “Would you- would you like to come in?”

“I’d love to, if you’re putting out,” Chris replies. There’s a beat, and then he freezes, eyes widening in horror. “If I’m not putting you out – not- not if you’re- I wasn’t, I didn’t mean- oh my god, Chris, stop talking you meatball,” Chris groans covering his face with a large hand. His next words come out a little muffled. “I am so sorry. Just ignore me. I have a horrible hangover, I promise I’m not usually this much of a disaster.”

Sebastian laughs, equally charmed by Chris’s helpless chattering as he is by the blush coloring his cheeks, just visible above the line of Chris’s well-groomed beard.

“You’re fine, I’m not easily offended,” he assures him, stepping aside to let Chris into the hallway. “I can take a lot.”

Oh.

This time, it’s Sebastian’s turn to wince at his choice of words, but when he tentatively glances back at his visitor to see if he noticed, he stills. The look on Chris’s face instantly makes him forget all about feeling embarrassed.

Still standing by the door, melting snow forming puddles around his feet, Chris is watching him intently. There’s something curious in his gaze, something sharp and searching.

It makes Sebastian’s breath catch in his throat. He swallows, resisting the impulse to avert his gaze, play it off as a joke. Instead, he makes himself stare right back. Lets the tension build, lets it simmer and crackle as it stretches out between them, growing stronger with every second they spend looking at each other in heavy silence.

“That right?” Chris asks finally, his voice a low rumble that settles in Sebastian’s bones like smoldering embers. Chris takes a careful step forward, slowly, giving him every chance to back away.

Sebastian stays where he is. 

“Mmm,” he hums, catching his bottom lip between his teeth and biting down lightly, experimentally, on the soft, plump flesh. When Chris’s eyes flick down to his mouth instantly, homing in on it like an eagle on its prey, Sebastian decides to take a chance.

“Tell you what,” Sebastian says huskily, stepping closer under Chris’s dark, watchful gaze. “Why don’t you give me a tour and show me which bedroom used to be yours-” he comes to a halt right in front of Chris, looking up at him through his eyelashes, “and maybe you’ll find out just how much I can take, hm?”

For a moment, Sebastian holds his breath, praying he read this thing right and didn’t accidentally sexually harass a virtual stranger – but then Chris growls and surges forward, and Sebastian knows his gamble is about to pay off.

Big time.

Merry Christmas to me, Sebastian thinks wildly, just before Chris claims his mouth in a searing kiss. After that, he stops thinking altogether.

❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️

[jjmaydank]

Love Language

summary: love languages come in every shape and size. If there are only truly five, How do you and JJ express yours? 

a/n: Not sure if I am thrilled with how his came out but I wanted to post anyway. I might write a part two about how JJ appreciates words of affirmation and physical touch too depending on how this one does. 

If you ask any adult they’d say that 16-year-old’s have no idea what love is, and for the most part they’d be right. You weren’t naive, you didn’t expect to end up engaged, married, and living full kook with JJ, but every time he looked at you. Man, your heart skipped a beat and maybe just maybe you thought about how losing him would be like losing everything. You’d been together since the summer of 2019, one year together and yet the genuine ‘I love you’ statements were reserved for more intimate moments. Moments where only you, JJ, and the four walls in John B’s guest room could hear. Or hushed moments in the hammock watching the sunset for the who-knows-hundredth time. Sometimes the love pours into everyday moments, whether with words or with actions.

Acts of Service 

The group was huddled in John B’s kitchen yet again.

“JJ don’t” Kie pleads. He only glances at her “I have a stomach of steel Kie don’t worry” JJ boasts proudly. Just as he finished putting together his sandwich, the front porch door opens. “Hey guys” You say carrying in a white plastic bag in your left hand. They all mumble out their course of hellos and you walk over to JJ. He begins to wrap his arms around your waist and lean in to kiss you, you lean back. A confused look spreads on his face and you look at the sandwich on the plate, “did you eat any of that?” You ask, disgusted? “Nah, but I’m about to” he says, removing his arms from your waist and going towards the sandwich.

“Don’t” you say seriously, taking his bicep in your hand. “I bought you something to eat”, you put the bag on the counter and slide it towards him. “Fuck I don’t deserve you” he says. Removing the layers of the food as fast as possible. You kiss his cheek and turn your attention back to the gang. “Why do I feel like I’m the only one who goes to school anymore?” you question sitting down on the couch. John B shrugs, Kie and Pope are engrossed in a conversation, and then JJ speaks up, “School is for losers” he says with his mouth stuffed. You give him a look from the couch that translates to ‘you wanna rethink that’. “...and pretty girls” he says after swallowing and grinning at you. “Nice save” Pope comments sarcastically. JJ just winks at him and decides to sit next to you.

Words of Affirmation & Physical Touch 

The scholarship you had applied for was supposed to send out the finalist email beginning today. You nervously kept refreshing your email, although you were too far out in the marsh for it to get signal. You enjoyed spending time with the group on the boat but right now, getting that email was all you could think about.

“Babe, Beer?” JJ says walking up to you and offering you a fresh can. 

You look up briefly before returning your attention to your phone screen “No thanks”. He picks up on your distressed tone quickly. I guess that’s what dating for a year will do to you. You could always tell when JJ needed you with just one look and he could always tell with your choice of words and the way you said them. “What’s up?” He sounds so concerned, you almost feel bad for coming to this outing. Everyone else is having fun but you’ve been sober and sitting down since you arrived. “I just- Remember that scholarship I told you I applied for? The one where I got really vulnerable for and poured out everything I had? Well they are sending out the results today and I haven’t gotten anything yet” you feel relieved to have finally told someone how stressed you were feeling. “They’d be stupid not to choose you Y/N” he says. “What if I didn’t even stand out? I don’t know if I’ll be able to afford any university without that scholarship J” you voice getting quieter towards the ends. “You already have a full ride to a university,” he says nonchalantly. You give him a questioning look before he grabs your hand and holds it against his chest. “The university of my heart” he says kissing your cheek. You pull your hand away, “ oh my god you dork I’m being serious” yet you can’t help and smile at his antics.

He reaches out and for a second you think he’ll pull you onto his lap or rest his hand dangerously close on your upper hand as he usually does. To your surprise he does either, instead he puts a hand on the knee and uses his thumb to rub comforting circles onto your thigh. You sigh peacefully and choose not to say anything. In this moment you feel as if every little circle motion his thumb makes is a secret language of its own. ‘I love you’ ‘you’re gonna get in’ ‘you’re amazing and crazy smart’ things he’d typically say to you out-loud. You choose to embrace the silence and revel in the secret language for as long as possible until you hear the familiar chime of your phone and break out of your trace to check it. “The application Status of Y/N L/N” reads the subject line, the opening line begins with congratulations and right then and there you know. You were chosen as finalist. “Holy shit I made the finalist list” you whisper to yourself but JJ hears. “You made it?” JJ says a bit louder. “Hey guys she made the finalist list” JJ calls out to the group The music. They all express delight for you and John B hands you a beer, “Cheers, I’ll drink to that” he says clicking his cab against everyone else’s. You feel JJ’s hand give a small squeeze to your hand before you turn to him, “I knew you could do it” he says, removing his hand from your knee and opting to place it on the back of your seat.

Quality Time & Gifts 

Feeling the sand under your bare feet and the night breeze, you curl up closer to the warm body next to you. Keeping your eyes closed as you pay attention to your breathing and try to sync up with JJ’s. 

“Considering you’re trying to jump onto me at any given moment, I’m surprised you haven’t tried anything” You say eyes still closed and adjusting your position against his chest. It’s moments like these that become rarer and rarer with all the chaos of John B possibly being put in foster care at any given moment, and in general always being around the gang. It wasn’t like you and JJ were a secret but you weren’t a fan of couples that made out in the hallways during passing-period, so PDA was kept minimal out of respect for pogue rules. “Pretty sure it's always you who wants to jump on me” he says and although your eyes are still closed, you can tell he’s smirking. You say nothing and let the conversation die there. No matter how terrible a day is, just being in JJ’s arms makes it better. 

“Do you think we’re together by chance or Fate? You ask quietly. You wonder if JJ would have even pursed you had you been a kook or missed at the party the night you met . “Does it matter?” He asks, “I’m just wondering” you whisper back. The silence that washes over you two feels comfortable. Your thoughts run wild thinking about how JJ is really a whole person stubborn but with feelings and thoughts. Out of all the people that you could have come across that night, it was him and out of girls that consistently admire him, he was here with you. Will this last forever? And if not how would it end? What if-

“I love you” JJ says, kissing the top of your hair. “What for?” you happily accept the head kiss but still inquire why the random love confession. “I always love you, but you were thinking so hard I could hear your thoughts” He explains. He begins to shift to sit up and you pull away to give me the room to do so. You knew that you couldn’t stay out there all night long, it was cold and dark but you were willing to bear the environment if it meant more alone time with JJ. You wait for him to get up and extend an arm to pick you up. Instead, he sits up and begins to reach around his neck. He takes off his shark tooth necklace with ease and motions for you to sweep your hair to the side. You do as you're told and he slips the necklace on admiring how it looks against your skin. You reach up and grab at the necklace slowly as if it could break at any given moment. “JJ you don’t have to, it’s yours” you say not wanting to take one of the most important things away from him. “You’re mine too, I want you to have it” He says running a hand through his hair, leaving his hair messier but framing his face nicely. “Well I love it and I love you” grabbing onto either side of his face and bringing him in for a kiss. He easily lays you down against the sand and crawls on top and you know exactly where this might be going. You push his face away and look into his eyes, it's cold and dark but you stare into him like he holds the answer to every question in the universe. JJ goes in to kiss you again and you roll to the side. You love him but you aren’t risking ending up covered in sand and with hypothermia.

“Inside?” You question while lifting yourself up and dusting off the remaining sand.

“Fuck yeah” He responds, ready to go.

[asterekmess]

Somebody tickled my salty-bone (in a good way. I love you. thank you.) and now I wanna vent about the absolute shitshow that is Stiles and Scott’s friendship.

Forewarning, I have a v faulty memory and I like to ramble. So. Obligatory Read More.

hoo boy. Now look, I am a salty little sea witch. I don’t like Scott. I love me some Stiles. Listen, I want to acknowledge here that Stiles isn’t perfect. He’s not the best friend that could ever friend, especially not at the beginning of the show. Yeah, he says stuff that riles Scott up. And yeah, he chucks lacrosse balls at Scott bc he’s pissed off at him. And he gets him beat up by blaming him for keying a car. These are objectively shitty things.

Now on to Scott. I’m starting at the beginning, because some brit chick told me once it’s a good place to start. It’s an anti-scott favorite to point out Star Wars. But I wanna talk about the history of Stiles and Scott’s friendship in general. We’re not explicitly told how long they’ve been friends. It’s implied “for ages” but there’s a lot of evidence that points to them not knowing each other until later (my preference is the 5th grade, just after Stiles’ mom died).

Stiles had a boa once, apparently. But Scott doesn’t know this. Stiles was apparently friends with Heather since they were in diapers but Scott doesn’t know her. Stiles has panic attacks and apparently a social anxiety disorder, but Scott has no clue about it.

Stiles doesn’t actually share many, if any, passions/interests with Scott besides Lacrosse. We know Stiles can skate, but Scott has never done it before Ice Pick episode. We know Stiles has other friends like Heather, but they’ve somehow never been introduced to Scott. Stiles plays videogames “Online gaming community that battles mythical creatures” but Scott has no clue what he’s talking about. Stiles has a favorite movie series that Scott has never watched. Scott, if I’m honest, got totally shafted by the show. He has no interests. We see a little dartboard on his wall in his room. We see posters. But he doesn’t do ANYTHING except play lacrosse and go to work at the vet. Then he gets a motorbike, which I guess....is supposed to count as a personality trait? We know jack-shit about Scott’s hobbies, even though he’s the main character. And what we do know is in Negatives. We know he has a shit vocabulary. We know he doesn’t like to read. (at least...before his “better Scott McCall program”) We know he doesn’t bowl. We know he sucks at literally all school related things. We know he has literally no other friends besides Stiles, until he becomes a werewolf.

But to me, what stands out is how...unobliging Scott is about their friendship?

It’s established that Scott usually runs around with Stiles when he’s got an idea, yeah. Two bros being dumbasses. Got it. But Stiles clearly has this whole mentality/joke view of them that’s Batman & Robin “I don’t wanna be Robin all the time” but Scott just sort of...shuts him down? “No one’s batman and robin any of the time”

I acknowledge that it’s a sort of tense situation...kind of? He’s sneaking into an empty bus lot to go sniff at the crime scene. He’s not really in danger here? But his tone of voice is so dismissive? Like he’s completely confused that Stiles would ever think that. But if they’ve been friends for ages, why would he only just now be finding out about it? And why would he dismiss it if they’re that close?

Then, of course, there’s Star Wars. Like...fine, whatever, Scott doesn’t like Star Wars. Except that it’s not that he doesn’t like it. It’s that he refuses to watch it. He knows nothing about Stiles’ favorite movie? He gets frustrated when Stiles makes Star Wars jokes because he doesn’t get them. But even KiRA is willing to watch it, and he just laughs about it.

Jackson and Lydia were supposed to be garbage to each other, but she still watched lacrosse videos with him and he watched The Notebook however many times Lydia wanted. If the couple we’re supposed to think is shitty is more kind to each other than Scott is to Stiles, what am I supposed to take away from that?

There’s also the part where he never just...believes Stiles? Not unless it’s in his favor. Sure, it sounds crazy that Stiles tells him he’s a werewolf and he’s gonna go crazy on a full moon. But Scott watched his bite completely disappear. He knows the shit he did on the field was bizarre and physically impossible for him. He doesn’t need his inhaler anymore. He heard Allison talking from Outside the School. There’s so much evidence to back Stiles up here, it’s ridiculous. And Scott still won’t believe him. Stiles tells Scott he thinks Matt’s the killer. Scott asks him why, Stiles doesn’t have an answer, and Scott immediately shuts him down. He tells Scott that it isn’t Lydia, and Scott argues with him, citing a test that he later admits he thinks is bullshit! Stiles tells Scott that virgins are being sacrificed and he’s scared he’ll be next, Scott laughs at him. Stiles tells Scott he thinks he was the one who wrote that shit on the board, the one who planted the bomb. Scott refuses to listen to him. He warns him about Theo, gets completely blown off. And Stiles is almost never wrong. But Scott continues to ignore him and refuses to believe him. Meanwhile Stiles believes Scott about Derek being dangerous. He believes Scott about Derek being the one in the bus. About how Peter is going after Allison (He must be going after Allison, the national archery finalist who’s always surrounded by hunters. Surely she’s “vulnerable.” It’s not like there’s someone way more vulnerable following Scott around, someone that Peter might force into helping him find Derek? HMMM?) Think about it, when does Stiles ever doubt Scott?

How he outright ignores Stiles just constantly? Even after he loses his temper with Stiles in the room in episode 1, he still goes to the Fucking Party. Even after Stiles tells him he can’t be in lacrosse anymore because it’s too dangerous, he ‘tries’ to quit and when he’s told that if he won’t play one game, he’s off first line, he outright ignores Stiles and fights with him until Stiles backs off and lets him play, where he proceeds to do EXACTLY what Stiles and Derek thought he would, and loses control. If ALlison hadn’t been there. People would have died. A kid from the other team saw Scott’s wolf eyes. He exposed himself! Then there’s the parts where he just pretends Stiles doesn’t exist. When he goes to hang out with Allison, and Stiles can’t get him on the phone, and when he finally answers he admits “did you get my texts?” “Yeah, all nine million of them” that he was literally just refusing to text Stiles back while he sat in the car with Allison and did nothing else. He won’t tell Stiles where he’s going, and he turns his phone off once they get to the woods. He also turns his phone off while Stiles is trying to take care of Derek, who IS POISONED and Bleeding and SHOT. Instead of trying to do anything he willfully ignores it and makes out with Allison, then wanders the house with Allison, then eats dinner with the family. He could’ve pulled the ‘i need to use the restroom’ ANY FUCKING TIME. He could’ve explained in a text at ANY TIME what he was doing and why it was taking so long. he just refused. When Stiles calls at the pool, Scott has no reason to hang up. Yeah, the phone made noise while it was ringing but after he hung up on Stiles he continued to just sit there with Allison and whisper to each other. He could’ve fucking talked on the phone! There was NOthing stopping him!

Then there’s how much danger he’s happy to put Stiles in? Like, he still hated Derek and thought he was a dangerous thug, while ignoring Stiles’ messages and leaving him alone with Derek. They knew Jackson was dangerous and had attacked Stiles before, and he left Stiles alone in the van with him?? Jackson wouldn’t need to break out of the vehicle, just the cuffs and Stiles would be dead. But for some reason Scott goes to school? LIke yeah I get it. He might fail his classes. But Stiles gave up first line just to check if Scott’s mom was the Alpha. Why couldn’t allison have watched Jackson with an arrow pointed at his head? She was better equipped than Stiles and in no danger of failing classes.

Look, I know I’m only talking about the first couple seasons but I have a rlly bad memory and I haven’t seen s3a or s3b in a long ass time. (gonna have to watch ‘em later tho while I work on the rewrite)

There’s probably more I’m missing. I’m just so damn cranky and sad. I’ll probably add more eventually when I get mad enough abt it.

[girlofthefandom]

Tales from the smp thoughts and random quotes I enjoy (essentially delayed live blogging) Part 1

I love all these npcs already

“Hurry up camera man!”

Yes! Gladiators! I remember seeing someone say that idea

Just some joes

Porkeous the 7th. Oh no I can see the fan girls now.

Yes! Punch em off!!

“Yeah same.”

“That’s good cause I don’t” “we build a new colosseum every time”

I can’t want to see the names of everyone’s characters. Especially Philz’

Stairs everyone’s worst enemy

Tubbo... sweet child

She disappeared!! Witch craft! Burn the witch!

Tubbo=Jacky (forced off streets)

Fundy=Laggius Maximus (I love this name so much with the spinning)

Please don’t kill both the boys in this fight. But also I’m cheating for Laggius.

Subbin Empire? Subbin to Technoblade!

Go Laggius! This is not going to go well... this is really not going to go well...

No I refuse to root for Jacky. I like Laggius the bit will be funnier later.

I want to know what happened to the last camera guy! Let us know!

Vertical feeling! Heaven forbid! Also look at them insulting TikTok

I love the background music. Feels magical.

A lovely jump

Surprises... well that’s ominous. And wait the first one!

Tower! Towers are always good.

We got our popcorn. Ready to watch this fight.

Laggius is... coming... maybe...

GG Jacky... he hasn’t won yet but gg.

Lava!!!! Hooray! Love us some good lava

Poor Laggius... he was burning too early

And Laggius is still lagging

Why isn’t Jacky burning?? He won???

Knocked unconscious in the lava. What is this a Pokémon game?

GG Jacky.

Nobody needs to know the way around here.

“Almost like a video game” just break that fourth wall right down

Keeps looking at sapnaps character and talking about strong. How sweet. We love some fiancé’s.

Please don’t throw Laggius to the wolves

Jack Manifold = Bartholomew

Phil having to translate. I love it.

Watson = Phil

Good pun. Very good pun.

Nobody likes Punz. Gosh everyone’s so mean

We love Watson. Let’s go Watson.

Bartholomew with the drugs and Watson.

Crazy drunk man with fire resistance

I agree with Watson why did we come to this cousin.

Sapnap in a hole

Also I love the drinking age being 3

Let’s go Watson!!!

Where are my Pom poms? I’ve got a Watson to cheer for.

Execute those architects.

And their first Borns.

Watson! Watson! Watson!

“Welcome to the land of the living Bartholomew.”

I love the slow fight.

Come on Watson shoot em!

Oh no. Oh no. Come on Watson. You’re so close!

Noooooooooo.

Why Bartholomew???? I can’t spell that! I’ve been relying on autocorrect this whole time.

Watson would be so much easier to spell.

Still must go down the stairs.

Speed running life. That’s what I do.

No one dies. Just take them to nurse joy.

Poor Punz being so bullied

Punz=Levi

Levi? Really? Oh well I like the name. He won’t like but I like the name.

Also why does Levi have such a full backstory.

Has weapon hands with a horrible southern accent. I love it.

“Hmmm”

Who is Ol’ Sap?

Sapnap = John

And no creativity apparently.

Laggius had the best name for a gladiator. All the others are too boring.

Why are we beating up BBH

Hannah=Genevieve

Genevieve! I can spell that thanks to old Barbie movies!!

Go Genevieve! Trained her life! I love this woman!

Mostly women upstairs. I love it our fandom is so biased.

“Are you sure about that?”

Darlin? Really that’s not the right word.

Go Genevieve! I probably shouldn’t cheer for her since everyone I’ve cheered for has lost.

But still GO GENEVIEVE!!

Our empire is millions in dept

Let’s step up the battle! Let’s gooooo

“Ayyyyy!!!”

Go Genevieve! Levi hush up with your gills.

Jump in! Splish Splash!

Wait why are we listening to Mario Kart music? Wait I recognize this song.

Go Genevieve!!

YES FINALLY! I PICKED THE WINNER!

Levi hush. You done lost messed up southern boi.

Go Genevieve! I can actually spell your name!

I straight forgot Porkeous the 7ths name for a second and had to check my notes.

Stairs. Woop de doo.

“Pick the most handsome” wow

Ol’ Sap = John as I remember. And he’s sticking with it. Bold man sticking with it.

Ranboo = Ran

Just Ran and it’s just the enderman part of the skin. Haha. Very funny.

BBH = Edward

He went from strange voice to normal(ish) voice

I don’t like Edwards speech pattern. At the very least. Yucky.

John v. Edward letsa go

Go John!

Wait we renaming? This is going to get confusing.

Handsome. Can you two quit flirting (not really keeping going)

Alrighty then Ugly v. Edward

Go Ugly! (Sentence I never expected to type)

The seat thing

And saying king Julien. Sigh.

Just BRB real quick.

Thinking about buying things. Oh he meant ad.

Alright Ad 1/3 let’s go.

No I can’t even open chat to watch them instead of the ad. Boooo.

2/3 let’s get this done!

3/3

Snickers just loading for forever

Alrighty we survived.

And a crown really? Just wants his normal skin back.

Let’s go Ugly!

Bo-at battle! Let’s go!

Please don’t shoot Ugly.

Go Ugly!

“King Are you ok!”

I still hate Edwards speech pattern so much

Please. Just pretend to have a fair fight.

The rabbits???? Cant rabbits swim?

Hooray rabbits! I don’t what purpose they serve but I love them.

Edward or Edwardo? Did I miss something?

Ok it seems both.

Shooting a rabbit? Disowner on you disowner on your cow.

Killing pets reference? The references are so good.

YES UGLY!!!! Thank heavens!

I’m 2/4 for choosing the winner.

I hope ugly keeps on winning

“Colosseum Remote Control”

3 in 1 battle how did they not plan correctly for an even number

Nerds hold cameras you heard it here folks

I don’t want to hear deeper for some of these stories. All I want to see is Genevieves further story. She seems deep.

“Massive pigs growling at us. No offense”

Watson trying to clean the table.

We bringing in the Harmonika.

Harmonika fits the moment.

Yes name him handsome! Haha

Grievous is how I’m spelling that stupid sounding name. But it’s better than John and ugly.

I can’t get over the name Ran.

BE GONE LEVI!

I love Watson having to take care of Bartholomew. Translating for him and waking him up.

Phil just can’t resist playing the dad.

No no stopping just fighting.

Also I love Watson saying break it up. I wish Watson had won.

Genevieve sounds like such a lovely lady and she deserves to win.

As much as I love Grevious I want Genevieve to win.

Sapnap=Grevious good gracious this is hard to follow.

Ran is cool. I’m going to kill over listening to them just saying Ran.

Complicated backstory. Found the main character.

Ran is cool.

Wait this place is going down??? Pardon me???

Three person fight is...

Grevious v. Ran v. Bartholomew

Genevieve v. Jacky

Puns! Let’s go! And of course Levi likes Puns.

Everyone is so mean.

GO GENEVIEVE!

And Watson just babysitting Bartholomew

I’m going to get good at spelling Bartholomew. Because I was horrible at it before.

Empire of women!

Cages=Lava

“Mmm what smells good”

Battle star!!

“Boing Boing Boing”

Water dome?

Water Dome in Lava?

Well he tried zombies/bunnies

Lava in the water sphere?

Only fight at top of fishbowl got it.

GO GENEVIEVE!

Come on girl you’ve got this!

No Genevieve babe please don’t lose.

“The boats going down.” “It’s yelling timber.” “Like that song that hasn’t been made yet.”

Hurry up and die. I love it.

NO GENEVIEVE!!!!!

Do do do do

That was a longer fight. But pretty good.

To the cellars! Not to the cellars!

No! The boat is gone!

That was close.

This feels like a funky Pokémon game.

Jacky is a finalist! Good for him. I’m not cheering for him but good for him.

TRIANGLE FORMATION

Who’s missing? Oh wait it’s Bartholomew

“Intense prison cosmetic surgery”

Rabbits! We love rabbits.

Oh no faceplant mode!

What is even happening?!?!

Thinking creatively.

Just don’t die. What a game.

Cant wait to watch the thinking creatively animatic.

In a boat to avoid floating.

Attack!

Go Ran!

Oh we’re lagging.

Disable the dive mode!

The zombies are a bit much. Oh everyone’s actually fighting.

Rats why weren’t there baby zombies when Watson was going. They even made a Phil reference.

No treaties.

Go Ran! Keep on running away.

I love Ran.

GO RAN! I love Grevious. But GO RAN

Faster Zombies. Zombies go zoom.

Oh Grevious won.

Wait why does Ran have grass and why do they see him again.

Placing more dirt to clean old dirt.

Poor Grevious.

I feel sorry for him now.

Stand on da dirt.

Put the rabbits in the cages!!!!

I cheer for Grevious.

And yes there are many a loser.

Everything is so spicy. As in lava is there.

You can’t kick your fiancé’s future descendent out of the gang.

A full inventory

Watson with the backup button!

Seriously all he can do is be a dad.

OH BOY LAGGIOUS IS BACK!

And he’s here for the picture.

And Watson is (still) bullying him!

Bartholomew is pure trouble.

Ooops. The root beer was on the brain.

Watson! Come get your drunk!

Oh wait he actually did! I love this so much.

Petition for more Phil in Tales.

Only Genevieve voting for Jacky

Some people refusing to vote.

I’m sorry who asked if Laggius is ok.

He is always (not) ok

He is fine. See.

I love Laggius’ character the most.

Go winners!

Reformed kinda. If that doesn’t sum up the whole of the smp.

All the grass in the cage.

And Laggius being his slow self.

Nothing v. General

I love how it went from King to Emperor to King

And there is Laggius.

I don’t know how anyone else is spelling Laggius but I like this way and refuse to edit it if it actually spelled different.

Oh we’re getting more ads.

1/3 let’s go

[radramblog]

Every Boros Commander, Part 1

Every one of these rambles is going to be longer and nerdier than the last, I guess. We’ll see how long I can keep that up for.

If you aren’t or haven’t been at least a casual fan of Magic: The Gathering, this post is going to be completely lost on you, sorry.

Oh also I’m having to split this in half since it took basically all afternoon to write and its still juuuust not done.

Boros gets a lot of shit for being bad and having bad generals for EDH until recently, and seeing as its my favourite two-colour pair I felt like exploring, well, every option we have for the combo. I’m excluding the new Commander Legends partner commanders in this, since I don’t have all day, and I’m also not covering Akiri and Bruse Tarl since no-one ever builds just Boros with them, and I’m not including 3-5 colour decks that just happen to have red and white in them. That’s not Boros.

Boros’s strengths are in manipulating combat, in tokens, and with Voltron strategies. It is the best pair for Equipment decks and top tier for Aggressive decks, to the point of being arguably shoehorned by WOTC into such strategies for a long time. Its weaknesses are mostly to do with card draw and ramp, possibly the most important things in a casual game of Commander, but the former is alleviated by many of red’s recent card draw options and the latter easily supplemented with mana rocks- if you have enough money, any deck can have good ramp, but enough budget options exist these days that it isn’t too bad even for the “worst colors”.

Anyway, enough beating around the bush lets get into this. Going in Chronological order.

Agrus Kos, Wojek Veteran (29th most played as of writing)

…It seriously took until Ravnica to get a legendary RW creature? Heinous. Cool as Agrus is as protagonist of the Ravnica novel, his card simply does not hold up in 2021, let alone beforehand. He’s a Glorious Anthem style commander, except he works best only with creatures that are both red and white, and not nearly enough cards produce multicolored tokens for him to boost. Oh, also he’s a 5 mana 3/3 with no protection or evasion that has to attack to get his effect. Save it for the novel.

Razia, Boros Archangel (30th most played as of writing, the last place finalist)

Speaking of Ravnica. Razia is fucking cool, between the art and unique, if underwhelming, activated ability. She is also 8 mana and not green. She is the only commander to my knowledge that can redirect damage to opponents’s creatures, so if that’s the deck you want to build, go for it, though enjoy the distressingly small cardpool. God, they couldn’t have given her an extra power, could they?

Brion Stoutarm (6th most played as of writing)

Brion is the first actually viable commander of the bunch, being a pretty decent head to either a Fling deck with Ball Lightnings or Acts of Treason, or just Giant Tribal with his Lorwyn compatriots. I don’t think I’ve ever seen or played against Brion yet, but I’d be interested in doing so. Having lifegain in the command zone with a deck that likes throwing damage around is pretty nice. It’s surprising that he’s still so high, especially considering EDHREC (my data source) only now pulls from the last 2 years of decks, but I’m certainly not sad to see him there.

Jor Kadeen, the Prevailer (19th most played as of writing)

Spoilers: Jor is actually the best Anthem commander. +3/+0 is huge, and when most of your ramp and some of your draw is artifacts you’re not going to have a hard time getting metalcraft. 5 mana is a fair chunk for an aggressive deck but he turns the damage output up enough notches that I think he’s pretty good. Underrated in my opinion. How are there more Tajic, Legion’s Edge decks than Jor Kadeen decks?

Basandra, Battle Seraph (24th most played as of writing)

Basandra is the head of my current Boros deck, being a pillowfort/combat manipulation deck. She’s, uh, not ideal in that even, since she stops even you from casting removal and such during combat. Having an extra must attack effect in the zone is nice, though, and a flying commander can be nice for closing games out. Basandra at least has the gift of being fairly open-ended, but also, she doesn’t really do anything, so that’s probably got something to do with it.

On a side note, fuck you Terese Nielsen for turning out to be a cunt. No-one else seems to have drawn this character, so I can’t even make an alter. Fuck.

Gisela, Blade of Goldnight (10th most played as of writing)

Gisela has a lot of very attractive words on her. Unfortunately, 7 mana and that ability means that as soon as you drop her out of the zone, you better use her quick because she isn’t sticking around long. Obviously lends herself to group slug or Earthquake decks, but the former paints an even bigger target on your head and the latter is even mana hungrier than normal. I prefer her in the 99.

Aurelia, the Warleader (5th most played as of writing)

Aurelia was the “best” Boros commander for a long time, and it’s easy to see why- haste and an extra combat trigger add up to a lot of damage very quickly and it’s not like there was much competition for a while. She’s actually the only one of the top 5 Boros commanders that wasn’t printed in the last 5 years, so I guess she’s stood the test of time, much like Brion.  I’d argue she’s pretty boring though, seeing as she has the one thing she does, but she does it well and there’s no faulting her for that. She’s the closest we have to r/custommagic’s favourite “double combat triggers” legend. A lot of people seem to run her as Angel Tribal too, which of the available Angels in the zone I’d argue that’s a pretty good shout. The Red/Boros Angels are fun!

Tajic, Blade of the Legion (20th most played as of writing)

The first on this list I’d consider playing as Voltron, Tajic’s first card is indestructible which as a former Sapling of Colfenor player is fucking excellent in the zone for when you have to play defensively. He does, however, require other creatures in the deck to truly shine, and you do have to have those creatures attack, so it can be awkward to get the most out of him. He’s a cool dude though, much better than his other card imo.

Anax and Cymede (23rd most played as of writing)

The first draft I ever played was a Born of the Gods draft in which I splashed Anax and Cymede. Clearly, I had no idea what I was doing. Anax and Cymede look a lot like Tajic in deck, to be honest, since they’re creatures that like having buffs but also want other creatures around to benefit. Heroic is kind of an awkward requirement, however, and I suspect you’d be spending more time just having it as a buff for the royals themselves. Its nice to see a loving married couple as a Magic card, though, I’m sure things will be good for them always.

Iroas, God of Victory (9th most played as of writing)

Somehow despite it being common in the 99 of aggressive decks, I don’t think I’ve ever seen an Iroas deck in my local metas. I think it has the potential to be pretty powerful, since if you can meet his (admittedly harsh) requirement he’s an indestructible evasive commander with that magical 7 power making commander damage a 3HKO. And when he’s not ready to rumble, he’s nigh impossible to kill on account of the limited targeted enchantment exile people tend to play in the format. Otherwise, he makes attacking free and bountiful for other creatures, and so is just kinda good to have around- I can see running him for that alone.

Munda, Ambush Leader (27th most played as of writing)

Somehow more people are playing Munda than Razia or Agrus, despite being just the worst commander with Ally in the text (outside the type line, love you Zada) and not doing actual anything outside of that. Why the fuck doesn’t he draw the cards? Why does he just stack them? God, Munda sucks. Also I have like 3 of them, since I drafted a lot of that deck in that environment and people just pass him around. Anyone want one? Be my guest.

Kalemne, Disciple of Iroas (11th most played as of writing)

Precon face commanders always get a bit more love and a bit more power than the average legend, and Kalemne is no exception. Double Strike in the zone on a creature that gets bigger is just nuts, and it means she kills people astonishingly quickly. Even my non-voltron Kalemne deck that just wanted to play big idiots had her as a huge threat since even if she gets killed she stays big. Kalemne also happens to be probably better for Giant tribal than Brion, though he does at least get to yeet those removal magnets if they do get removed.

Anya, Merciless Angel (26th most played as of writing)

I didn’t think Anya would be this low. While she is another indestructible commander, it is conditional, and her abilities are self-sabotaging- if someone is in range of being killed by her, you’re probably not going to want to attack them just so you can keep indestructible and buffs, but you also, yknow, want to kill them. I can see her being political in this way though- keeping someone alive with her swords at their throat can have some fun implications. I think shes underrated despite her awkwardness.

Archangel Avacyn (14th most played as of writing)

(Her colour identity is RW since her other face is a red creature. It’s a bit odd, I know)

Avacyn was fucking unbeatable in draft and obnoxious in Standard (though one of my favourite magic stories involves her, so,), and since I never managed to get one for Kalemne when that deck was around I have no real love for her. She’s generically powerful without leading in a particular direction, but her flip ability is pretty cool as is her story in the set. It’s OK. Also why do people keep putting her in Angel decks? You know she doesn’t flip off those, right?

Adriana, Captain of the Guard (22nd most played as of writing)

Adriana, Adriana. I didn’t dislike Adriana as much as I did until I actually did the math on her. Typical commander games are 4-player, so she is a +3/+3 anthem at maximum assuming you have good attacks on every single opponent and that none of them are dead yet. I’m really not sure why you’d play this over Jor Kadeen, and it looks like people aren’t, so. Melee was a fun mechanic in draft, but I completely understand why it hasn’t crossed over, ever, to other formats, seeing as there are 7 total cards with it and most of them are draft chaff. CONTINUED IN PART 2...ANOTHER DAY. PROBABLY SOON SINCE IT’S 2/3 DONE ALREADY.

[artificialqueens]

Down with the Recipe, Bake from the Heart, 6/10 (Taywhora) - Juno

Chapter summary: For alternative ingredients week, the bakers are challenged by a vegan signature, a gluten-free technical, and a dairy-free showstopper which will threaten to derail them. Meanwhile, Aurora is confused by Tayce’s seemingly opposing actions. Bimini’s motives are a mystery to everyone in the tent. And Lawrence’s strange avoidance of Ellie may send her to breaking point.

WEEK 6: ALTERNATIVE INGREDIENTS WEEK

All of Aurora’s side had moved up one space following Asttina’s unexpected elimination last week. Now Lawrence was at the front of their row, with Ellie behind her and Aurora behind Ellie. On the other side there was Bimini at the front, followed by Tia, then Veronica, and Tayce at the back, still on her own as Aurora’s side dwindled each week.

It was the halfway point in the series, and Aurora wasn’t nervous any more.

Screw that. I’m Star Baker. None of them had better mess with me.

Five more episodes to go, and only four more eliminations. It almost felt like the home stretch.

Aurora was a little taller this week, letting her gaze drift around the much-emptier tent, wondering who the three finalists would be.

Me and Tayce for definite. But who else?

Bimini and Ellie had a badge each, while Tia, Veronica and Lawrence were yet to win one. But Asttina had won the first week and gone home.

Besides, they all had strengths and weaknesses. Ellie couldn’t get consistent in Technicals, but always made up for it with her Showstoppers, a seemingly boundless imagination in that head. And Bimini had been fair, not bad but not great; but they’d won Bread Week. Anyone who watched more than one season of this show knew that winning bread week was basically a Willy Wonka golden ticket to the finale.

Then again, Veronica was a great baker, and she had yet to have a disastrous round, even though she hadn’t exactly done anything groundbreaking either. And Lawrence was consistently in the top half of the pack, and Aurora thought she could have won Bread Week too - if Bimini hadn’t pipped her to the post.

That just left Tia. Tia, who could bake an amazing, light-as-air cake; whose rainbow-iced biscuits were just the right ginger flavour; and whose bread was delicious - but whose bakes always looked like she’d sat on them before presenting them. Great taste, but appalling presentation.

If she starts nailing the looks of her bakes, she’s gonna win a badge.

Still, badges didn’t guarantee you a place in the final. Asttina had already gone home; someone else with a badge might do the same this week.

What if it’s the Star Baker curse? Coming back to take us badge-winners out one by one? Maybe it will be badge-less finale?

But Aurora pushed that thought away.

There isn’t a Star Baker curse. That was just some previous seasons. You don’t win Star Baker and get eliminated the next week any more.

Bimini was grinning from ear to ear, and Aurora realised why - it was alternative ingredients week, and there was definitely something vegan in the pipeline for Bimini to excel at.

——

Signature: 6 vegan mini quiches.

“Prue and Paul would like you to make six vegan mini-quiches this week. Now, these are not quiches made out of vegans, but quiches made with no animal products at all - no dairy or eggs.”

“And of course the filling must also be vegan - so no meat or cheese for the flavourings.”

Aurora grimaced. Here we go.

This was the week Aurora had been dreading. She’d tried to make vegan cakes and gluten-free treats for her work with the shelter, but they’d almost always failed. She’d sworn off making anything for her best friend Blake, who was celiac, telling him to go find a professional baker.

“But that’s you!” He’d protested, nudging her as she declined to make him a birthday cake last month.

She’d sighed. “I’m not that good, mate. I don’t really want to kill you.”

He’d tilted his head. “Bit rich to think you could get rid of me that easily. If you kill me with a bake, I’ll just come haunt you. Rattle some chains at you like I’m fucking - Marley or whatever his name is.”

Aurora sighed at the memory. Trust Bookworm Blake to bring up a Dickens reference.

Once Matt and Noel had announced that it was time to start baking, Aurora grabbed the ingredients she needed and ran her pencil back down her recipe again. The dough for the pastry cases was straightforward enough - she had to replace the milk, but there were plenty of replacements, and Aurora had opted for oat milk, which she’d read was best for vegan baking.

The real challenge, and she thought everyone was thinking the same thing, came to the filling. She had her pastry cases ready to go in no time, but making the filling eggy but also egg-less would be the biggest issue.

God. What do vegans do about eggs?

“You alright, babes?”

Aurora met Bimini’s hazel eyes as they stood, leaning on their elbows at Aurora’s workbench.

“What - what are you wearing this week?” Aurora said finally. Bimini’s outfit this week was a red and silver jumpsuit under the plain beige apron, causing an absurd clash of colours. “You look like a can of Coke.”

“Oh, this old thing? I found it in the back of my wardrobe earlier this week. Nah,” Bimini waved their hand, “it’s a replica of an outfit Noel wore when he was in The Mighty Boosh. You know, that comedy show he did? You never seen it?”

“And he wore that?” Aurora nodded. “Okay. Well, I guess it looks as if it will repel food if you spill it on yourself.”

“You alright, anyway?” Bimini switched straight back to concern, a concern that Aurora was unsure was real.

We’re at mid-point. Is this some kind of game plan that Bim has?

“Yeah, I’m fine.”

“You sure? Because baking something vegan is normally weird enough for people when they don’t have any vegans in their lives, but like, when it has to be egg-less, people tend to lose their minds a bit.”

“Well -“

Aurora faltered for a second too long; and that was enough of a cue for Bimini to round the corner of the workbench and sift through Aurora’s ingredients.

“Hang on. What are you replacing the egg with?”

“Uhm,” Aurora held it up. “Silken tofu. I thought I’d blend it and use that for the filling.”

Bimini gave a low whistle, nodding and evidently impressed. “Good choice! You just have to make sure you blend it so there’s no lumps. Whizz it up really fast. Give it a splash of oat milk too, you don’t want lumpy quiches. Oh, and if you have nutritional yeast, it will give it a really good flavour.”

Before Aurora could say another word, Bimini had skipped away to Veronica on the other side of the room. “You alright, babes?” She heard them say to her.

“What’s Bim doing?” Aurora asked Ellie as they went to the tea tent together.

Ellie shrugged. “Don’t know. They came over to me earlier and gave me some tips on the egg mixture.”

“They did the same thing to me! Did it help you at all? Are they - d’you think they’re playing the game?”

“Weird game to play,” Ellie shook her head. “And my egg mixture seems to be alright. What I’m wondering is when are they gonna make their own quiches? They’ve spent twenty minutes coming and looking at all ours instead.”

But when Ellie and Aurora went back to the tent, Bimini had put their pastry cases in the oven and was doing some sort of rap and dance with Noel, the cameras trained on them both.

This day is just getting strange.

While her own pastry cases were baking, Aurora watched the judges approach Tayce, who was a little behind the rest of them, still moulding her pastries into the cases and preparing the beads at the bottom of them to keep their shape whilst baking.

“Morning Tayce!”

Tayce blinked, for a second in a dream, before putting on her winning smile. “Bore da, judges! Fancy seeing you here!”

“Tell us a bit about your bakes.”

“Well,” Tayce leant over the workbench, surveying them through her eyebrows. “I’m making some mini quiches flavoured with onions, tomato, and broccoli.”

“What’s inspired that then?”

Aurora’s heart stopped beating for a moment as Tayce paused for a couple of seconds, and then chuckled, a strangely sad sound, her head suddenly dropping to hang.

She straightened back up, putting the winning smile back from where it had slipped.

“Makes me think of my Pops. Out in the allotment, digging around for onions and potatoes and all that stuff, he liked to bring me along and gave me a little trowel and let me dig for worms. He’d say, Oh, they’re good, worms, good for the earth.” Tayce paused, tentative, before her next words. “Would have been his birthday today.”

“That - all sounds very nice,” Prue said gently. “Best of luck! Can’t wait to taste them, Tayce.”

And they were gone, going out the tent to grab themselves a cup of tea for their own break. Tayce stared straight ahead for a few seconds, before biting her lip, turning her gaze down to the onions she was about to start cutting.

Aurora realised her own hand was on her chest, at the base of her throat.

——

In spite of the ingredients being a little unorthodox, not what she was used to at all, Bimini’s tip for blending the tofu worked surprisingly well, and when Paul and Prue had both praised her tomato, spinach and olive mini quiches - not Aurora’s idea, one her nan had told her to do to be ‘more posh’ - Aurora realised with a rush that almost everyone had had some good critiques this week, mostly on the quality of their egg replacements.

And they’d all been based on Bimini’s good advice.

Handshakes were being dished out like Oprah’s cars. Lawrence got a handshake, then Veronica got a handshake, then - Aurora gasped - Tayce got a handshake, looking flustered for the first time since Aurora had known her, with a high-pitched giggle that Aurora was unfamiliar with, and a gasp of “Who, me? Like this?”

“Contest seems to be heating up,” Aurora said, as they sat in Carr Hall’s common room during the break. “And we thought you were trying to sabotage us, Bim!” She said as Bimini approached them, grinning from cheek to cheek, a pile of mini quiches on their plate.

“I’m just happy I get to try everyone’s this week,” they replied, picking up one which Aurora recognised as her own, and biting into it. “God. It’s so harsh seeing loads of cakes and stuff each week and only being able to try your own.”

“I’ve tried vegan baking before, it just always goes tits up,” Tayce piped up, coming to sit down. “Like me on a Friday night. It goes flat, or it goes wonky donkey, or it falls over.”

“Is that the cake, or you on a Friday night?” Bimini nudged Tayce with their foot; Tayce responding by slapping their arm.

“Hey! Cheeky bitch. Bet I’m not the only one.”

Tayce was laughing and joking as usual, while Aurora couldn’t help chewing her lip. It was a little uncomfortable, Aurora found, being around Tayce right now.

Last week had been the strangest week yet. She’d found herself floating through it in a mixture of fun at flirting playfully with Tayce, a little bit of pride at being the centre of attention for once, and trying to let herself enjoy the baking in the same way she did when she baked for her friends - filling it with love and good thoughts and positivity.

And it had worked. A bright badge in the shape of a dessert sat on her chest.

But the day of the Showstopper, things felt distorted again.

She’d known this whole flirting thing was meant to be a play for the cameras. That was what Tayce had implied only two weeks ago, that their romance was mainly for on-screen. But last weekend, Tayce in her bed, warm and secure and silent, was heavenly; both of them comfort for each other during this time, and Aurora dared to hope that Tayce might be starting to feel the same way as she did …

… until she’d woken up the next morning to find an empty bed, a cold spot where Tayce should have been.

And then again in the evening, just the two of them. Tayce hadn’t even responded to her kiss, instead opting to leave straight after, as if she didn’t want to be around her at all.

Aurora didn’t understand, all her thoughts about what was going on and what this blur from fake flirting into actual closeness was … tangling into one big worrisome knot that occupied most of her mind.

Does she have any feelings for me at all, or … is this fake-flirting thing a really elaborate scheme to distract me and get me sent home?

——

Technical: 12 Gluten-free pitta breads

“Any tips for the bakers this week, Paul?”

“Yes.” Paul straightened up. “The ingredients are there to be used.”

At the relative silence throughout the tent, Matt shrugged. “Alright then. That’s nice and clear. They have to leave the tent now, so goodbye judges!”

Once the judges had gone, and the Technical had been announced, Aurora shut her eyes, her fingers drumming on the workbench again. Gluten-free pitta bread? This week was going to be even more hell.

She focused on making notes on her instructions, and once she’d got her ingredients into the KitchenAid, she was starting to feel a little calmer, as she did once things were starting to move. She was running her pencil down her notes when her thoughts were interrupted by a voice in front of her.

“You alright, babes?”

She looked up to see Bimini leaning over her workbench, chin in their hands. Aurora tried to hide the frown. Again?

“Hi. No - no. I can never get gluten-free baking right. My best friend is celiac, and I haven’t managed to make anything he can eat that doesn’t look like a mess.”

“More xantham gum than you think,” Bimini muttered with a wink. “That’ll make it less crumbly. Oh, and if you rest it, it will help the bake.”

When Bimini skipped away again, over to Tayce to most likely give her the same tip, Aurora stared dumbstruck after them for a good ten seconds before shaking her head in wonder and adding another teaspoon of xantham gum to the dish.

“Did he say they wanted six pitta breads?” This time it was Ellie’s voice that made Aurora look up.

“No - twelve.”

“Ah - alright.”

Aurora concentrated on kneading the dough, trying to give it as much air as possible, when she was interrupted again, this time by a gentle but familiar hand on her shoulder. She turned to look at Tayce, who held a cup of tea in her other.

“Thanks.”

The cameras were absent, pointed at Bimini and Noel doing some dance at Bimini’s workbench, rapping along to something.

“You looked like you could do with some tea. Giving that dough some welly, aren’t you?”

Tayce’s voice was strangely subdued, her fingers twisting in front of her. She took a deep breath, closing her eyes to savour it. “I love the smell of dough. Makes me think about my nana’s house. She was always baking stuff. Her whole kitchen smelled like a bakery.”

She was stopped in her reminiscing by Ellie knocking her baking tray to the floor with a crash. Pushing her hair behind her ears, Tayce nodded to Aurora.

“Right. Well. Better get back to it.”

And Aurora stared at her retreating back, wondering what had come over Tayce today. She wasn’t really as flirty, more … caring, even bringing over tea for her. This whole arrangement was just getting more confusing. It was supposed to be fake, but now lots of threads of what seemed like care were starting to entwine themselves into the knot her mind was in.

I just can’t think about Tayce right now. It’s too confusing. Focus on pitta bread.

By the time Aurora was laying out her pittas on the baking tray, Ellie spun round to her again, hands clutching at her hair.

“Is it six pitta breads?”

Why am I bloody Wikipedia all of a sudden today? And didn’t she just ask me this a minute ago?

“Eleanor,” Aurora said sternly, while Ellie grimaced, seeming to shrink slightly.

“I know, I know -“

“It’s on the top of the instructions as well - look - twelve pitta breads! I think you need a break or something, Els,” Aurora pointed outside. “Why don’t you take two minutes or something?”

But Ellie’s hands, still in her hair, balled into tight fists as she spoke, sounding a little hysterical. “I can’t - it’ll spoil - I don’t -“

“Ellie, go outside! Go on! You’re panicking!”

As Ellie marched past her outside, Aurora watched Tia, her breads already in the oven, rushing out after her. But Lawrence, in front of Aurora, simply glanced to the clear partition of the tent briefly, before turning back to putting her bread on the baking tray.

“Lozza?” That was Tayce, who had noticed the same thing. But Lawrence didn’t seem to hear her, even though everyone else in the tent did.

“Lawrence -“

“I’ll go get her in a tick, alright?”

Aurora swallowed, watching Lawrence as she arranged her breads, putting them in the oven, and she had no choice but to do the same; time was running out for them all.

It wasn’t long before Tia led Ellie back into the tent, arms linked, as Tia dropped Ellie off at her bench and stopped for a second to talk to her. “It’s just a bake, alright? Sometimes bakes go wrong for whatever reason, and that’s okay! Remember, you can only get better from making mistakes, alright?”

And Ellie nodded, grabbing her dough to shape into the pitta breads. Tia gave her one last squeeze on her forearm before heading back to her own bench to carry on her pittas, which were starting to look a bit flat.

Hopefully that will be the kick Ellie needs to turn this bake out.

When it came to judging, she sat with Tayce, who nudged her in the ribs with an oddly saccharine smile. Ellie still looked subdued on her other side, so she took her hand, rubbing it with her thumb, but to no reaction.

“In seventh place, we have this one, whose is this?” Paul motioned to Ellie’s plate, and Ellie defeatedly raised her hand no higher than her chin.

“Ellie - far too much baking powder in these, it burns the tongue - and a little bit over-baked, we expect them to still be soft in the middle.” Paul nodded to her, but Ellie just blinked in response, pursing her lips.

“And in sixth place -“

“Oh, that’s me,” Tia replied, raising her hand.

“Tia, these are burnt. I know you tried to scrape them a little so it looks a little bit better, but they cracked when we tried to bend them.”

“Okay,” Tia nodded, the earnest smile still on her face. “Next time.”

Aurora still cringed to herself whenever Tia said next time in response to her disasters. When in the name of Dawn French would she ever have to make gluten-free pitta breads again?

Maybe she has a bestie who’s celiac that she really wants to make some bakes for. Like Blake is.

The realisation stung Aurora harder than she thought it would. After all, she’d been wondering if she could make these for Blake one time. She leaned forward and saw Tia, no tears, no self-pity, graciously smiling at Veronica as Veronica tried to comfort her.

She never makes excuses. She’s never sorry for herself. She just … tries again.

Maybe that was it. This competition was about self-improvement, wasn’t it? Aurora pictured how happy Blake would be if she told him when she got back that she’d made something gluten-free and that she could now bake more things the same way.

How much she’d grown as a baker only in these six weeks.

“Whose is this one?”

Tayce was nudging her, and Aurora saw that Paul was behind her photograph. She raised her hand.

“Aurora - really good bake, well done. It just came down to the colour on this one. Which means the winner is … this one!”

Second in Technical! That’s gonna help at this point.

She joined the polite applause given to Veronica for her top placement, Veronica’s mouth agape in apparent shock. But as they all trudged out to the tent for their interviews, she watched Veronica spin in elation, her balled fists in the air to celebrate her placement, as if she’d expected it all along.

How much of any of this is real?

——

“Are they annoyed at us?” Veronica murmured, watching Tia and Ellie on their own on the opposite side of the room. They’d both opted to sit alone together, chatting quietly at first, both pallid and shaky, but now they sat silently, staring at the ceiling fan as it turned.

“I don’t think so -“ Aurora began, but Lawrence was chewing her finger again, and Veronica’s jaw twisted as she watched them. “I mean - you got top and third in Technical, you’re doing good - and they’re happy for you -“

“They don’t look fucking happy,” Lawrence muttered.

“They are, honest to God,” Aurora said, trying to calm Lawrence’s evident nerves, “but like … it’s hard, isn’t it, seeing people do better than you at this stage in the competition? We’re all here to win, at the end of the day.”

“We are all here to win, but …” Veronica trailed off with a sigh. “Me and Tia … we’ve really bonded.”

“You’ll still be friends afterwards! Or - y’know, whatever you two are.”

“What’s that meant to mean?” Veronica snapped.

“It’s pretty obvious to anyone with eyes, Veronica,” Lawrence added, “I don’t think you can really try to downplay that one.”

“Oh, right?” Veronica’s face grew redder with every second. “What about you then, Lawrence, if we’re bringing that up? You’ve been trying to avoid Ellie since Tayce said she saw the two of you canoodling after Asttina’s elimination last week!”

Lawrence’s jaw dropped open, and she frowned. “Canoodling? Did you really just say canoodling in a sentence?”

“I’m gonna go outside if you two are going to just argue,” Aurora muttered, shaking her head, standing to walk away from them both.

Her feet led her outside into the warm evening glow, watching the first of the stars come out into the deepening blue of the sky. The trees around the grounds caught the last orange light, a ring of fire, still a hot pressure cooker of a contest.

Aurora knew where Tayce would be. Through the grounds by the trees was a lake they’d found only last week, that Bimini had told her about, having found it on their morning run. And sure enough, she found Tayce on the bench, leaning on one elbow and kicking dirt with her shoe.

In spite of the confusion in her mind, Tayce still drew her in like a magnet.

When Aurora came to the bench, she startled Tayce momentarily, before Tayce’s easy smile came back, and Aurora sat with her, pulling her close into a one-armed hug.

“Hey.” Tayce gently disentangled herself, still not sounding herself. “Coming to see me?”

“I can’t stand being around those lot any more,” Aurora huffed. “I don’t know what’s going on with any of them, but it feels like you can cut the air in the room with a butter knife, for God’s sake.”

“They’re just annoyed because one of them is getting eliminated tomorrow.”

Aurora blinked at her strangely sharp words. Tayce scuffed the dirt with her shoe, turning to meet Aurora’s stare and to give her a reassuring smile, but it didn’t stretch to her eyes, and she looked as if she almost didn’t seem to believe it herself.

“You got a bit emotional earlier as well, when you were talking about your quiches.”

Tayce shrugged. “Yeah, yeah I did a bit.” She turned back away to scuff her shoe again, a little rougher than before.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

She shrugged. “Not much more to tell, really, just me and my Pops going to get veggies from the allotment. He had tomatoes in his greenhouse. And broccoli. He had loads of veggies.”

“Did he bake with you too?”

“Yeah. Actually, he liked making a quiche or two. Normally with ham, but he used to let me put the beads in the pastry tins to keep the crust from moving. Or he’d make a pie and let me do all the crimping on the edges.”

Tayce’s smile was fading as she spoke, leaning her head back to look at the sky.

“I miss him.”

Three words that hit Aurora right in the middle of her chest.

Her own eyes welling up, she rubbed Tayce’s back, until Tayce shuffled nearer and let herself drop her head to Aurora’s shoulder, let Aurora pull her in tightly, sitting silently to count the stars as they came out of their hibernation.

“It’s weird.”

“What’s weird?” Aurora asked.

“I dunno, just - it’s weird the things that remind you of people.”

“That doesn’t sound weird to me.”

“I mean …” Tayce began, but she stopped, twisting to get comfortable. “Oh, it doesn’t matter.”

Tayce was an elastic band, pulling away before snapping her back with a modicum of tenderness, and letting Aurora back in to see through some of the cracks in her armour. Just enough to keep Aurora hanging on, so it felt.

It was exhausting.

——

Showstopper: A dairy-free, vegetable-based novelty cake.

The Showstopper seemed straightforward enough. Everyone liked carrot cake, right? At least, Aurora enjoyed a slice of the orange stuff, although when she’d mentioned it to Ellie this morning she’d wrinkled her nose in an adorably disgusted manner.

“What’s yours going to be, then?” She’d asked.

“Beetroot.”

“Beetroot?”

“Yeah,” Ellie had nodded earnestly, “like, I know it sounds a bit weird, but trust me, when you mix it with chocolate it tastes like heaven.”

Aurora hadn’t pushed the matter any further, but a bigger part of her than she anticipated was hoping Ellie could pull it off. After all, she and Tia were practically tied for worst at the moment, and as much as Aurora was growing to like Tia, she and Ellie had bonded far more.

On Aurora’s left, she watched Tia chopping sweet potatoes that would form the basis of her own cake, ready to cook and then go into the mixture. Veronica, in front of her, was also making sweet potato cake, but Aurora wasn’t worried about Veronica.

When she and Tayce had spoken about who she thought would excel at this week, they’d both said Bimini above everyone, but Veronica had been the shock frontrunner, the dark horse, as she had been all this contest. Veronica tended to keep to herself, grinding her teeth and locking her jaw, a cool stare keeping everyone away.

How someone as uptight as Veronica had thawed to someone as lackadaisical as Tia was anyone’s guess.

“Yeah, I guess she’s a bit stiff,” Tia had shrugged when asked about Veronica, “and yeah, don’t mention anything about the two of us to her, she’s a bit nervous about it being public yet. But we actually have loads in common. She’s really arty. She painted one of the scenes I photographed and showed it to me this weekend, and that meant a lot.”

“She - she paints?”

Tia had shown them all Veronica’s instagram, where Veronica had painted breathtaking scenes and posted them there. Watercolours mostly, with the odd acrylic, some experimental but mostly true life, leaping from the screen and into their minds.

Veronica might not be quite making the same art as usual now, but her bakes definitely showed some artistic flair when she presented them. They always had to be just so. And her colour palettes were always a theme in the judges’ comments.

“Well,” she’d grinned nervously this morning at breakfast when asked, “I’m left-handed. So I’m a bit arty farty, yeah.”

Aurora stole glances around the room as always, seeing Bimini with Tia a lot more today, leaning over her workbench and giving her guidance. Ellie looked a little less nervous, but she and Lawrence still weren’t really communicating.

Maybe Lawrence really is trying to avoid her. Or maybe they’re avoiding each other.

But Ellie had changed the subject this morning when Aurora had tried to bring it up. Turning the conversation back to her and Tayce.

And that was complicated enough.

This morning was the second weekend in a row she’d found herself falling asleep with Tayce in her bed, and the second weekend in a row she’d woken up in the morning to find an empty space there again.

It was a strange, numbing place, and Aurora wasn’t even sure what they were at the moment. Sure, they’d agreed to put on a bit of a show for the cameras. And Aurora could deal with that, with the playful nicknames, the kisses, the touch that didn’t feel tender enough to be more than method acting.

But Tayce spending the night in her bed had been an odd addition. Aurora had held her hand as she’d drawn her back from the pond, and they’d both ended up back in her room again, Netflix on, curled up into one another under the duvet.

All it had taken last night was half an episode of Glow before their hands and arms had intertwined, drawing them nearer still, into slow breathing in tandem with each other. Tayce purring at Aurora’s fingers as she played with her hair, until her breathing had relaxed even more and Aurora had looked down to see Tayce asleep at her chest, too serene to disturb by shifting her.

Nothing about it felt like an act. In fact, it was practically the opposite - bare bones, honesty, sincerity.

A far cry from the motions in the tent.

“Hey, babe. How’s the carrots?”

Speak of the devil.

Before Aurora had the chance to look up, she felt Tayce’s fingers at her waist, her chin resting on her shoulder.

Tayce seemed to be feeling a little better this morning. Her relaxed smile was back, her eyes glinting with the same mischief, and Aurora’s stomach was turning somersaults at the contact.

“Carrots are good. Just grated far more than I’ll need, just in case. What are you making with yours?”

“I’m making carrot cake too!” Tayce chuckled in her ear, sending a shiver down Aurora’s neck. “What a coincidence. It’s almost like we’re really in tune with each other. I hope you haven’t read my mind on what my flavours will be as well?”

But as Aurora looked, two cameramen were following them over to Tayce’s bench, as Tayce’s hand hovered at her back. “Carrot and cream cheese replacement, and I’m gonna shape it into a cow’s head, because … you know, no dairy?” Tayce chuckled. “I’m a comedy genius!”

“So we’re a bit different then,” Aurora nodded, as Tayce rested her head at her shoulder. “I’m adding diced pecans to mine.”

“So different then,” Tayce interrupted her, smirking, a hideously fake giggle bubbling at her throat. “That’s good. We’re just doing carrots at the same time! Imagine if we’d had the same recipe and the same idea. That would be strange, wouldn’t it!”

She’s trying a bit too hard now.

Tayce’s fingers were looped round her waist, her head on her shoulder; but she didn’t seem to be listening, just talking at the cameras pointed at them both. Aurora disentangled herself from Tayce’s touch and smiling as widely as she could, backed away.

“You going back to your bake?”

“Yeah - lots to do, Tayce,” Aurora muttered through gritted teeth.

“Alright. Cwtch you later.” Tayce cocked an eyebrow as she smirked, but Aurora’s stomach twisted at how sinister her words seemed to sound on her tongue.

——

“Veronica, would you bring your cake up to the front please?”

Veronica was last this week - the judging had been in alphabetical order - but Aurora had also barely been concentrating. Tayce’s actions this afternoon had confused her yet again, and she’d tried to avoid speaking much to Tayce for the whole rest of the day, but that hadn’t gone as well as she’d hoped. Tayce had come over regularly, and cameras had followed them both around.

“It’s - it’s a sweet potato cake flavoured with almonds, and the icing is dairy-free buttercream with a vanilla flavour.”

Veronica was giggling nervously, while the rest of the people in the tent smiled at her. But Aurora’s mind span in a whirlwind of thoughts.

What if Tayce really is trying to distract me? To throw me off?

The thought struck her over the head, a sudden bolt of lightning that left her numb with the shocking gravity of it.

No. Tayce is trying to keep attention on us. She’s trying to help us.

… or at least help herself.

But Aurora hastily pushed that notion away. After all, everyone else in the tent was also fighting for that attention, whether they meant to or not.

Take Bimini, and their absurd dancing and rapping with Noel, what they insisted was called a crimp, whatever that meant. Was that genuine, or was that the result of them all being on the show? Maybe Bimini was a bit of an exhibitionist, but maybe they weren’t - maybe it was a front.

Was that really all that different to Tayce wanting to play up their relationship to the cameras?

How do I know that she feels anything for me at all?

“Beautiful. Beautiful flavours, you don’t get anything apart from a rich, sweet cake, and the design is ingenious. Really great week for you, Veronica.” Prue was smiling her sweet smile, and Veronica hunched shyly into her shoulders as she took the cake back.

The fog of dread was descending on them all as they walked back to Carr Hall. The bakes were always put on a table for them to try, before being given to the crew at the end of the day; but no one really felt like eating anything as they went in, the fog following them all.

“We don’t want anyone to go home at this stage,” Veronica said grimly.

They all knew what she really meant, Bimini more than anyone, as they nodded and stretched their legs out. “It’s shit. I feel like a jinx. Get too near to me, and you’re gone. Happened to Ginny, then Asttina.”

Aurora thought back to the judging for Bimini’s Showstopper, which hadn’t gone as well as any of them had thought.

“I thought this week was yours for the taking, Bim,” Aurora said quietly, cautious. “It’s all vegan stuff, and alternative ingredients. No one would have thought you’d be getting those sorts of critiques.”

Everyone murmured in agreement. The judges has been kind as always, but it was clear that Bimini had landed themselves in trouble at the expense of helping out everyone else in the tent, helping them all with their recipes.

“Well, I did.”

They all turned to stare at Bimini’s dark words.

“Bim?”

“It’s my own fault. Well, not even really a fault. But somewhere between Asttina going home and me coming back here this weekend, I decided it’s probably not important.”

“What isn’t?”

“A cake stand.” Bimini laughed bitterly. “That’s what it is! A cake stand. And I can get one of those from M&S. I could get Joe to come with me. No, I knew this was gonna be an okay week for me, so …” they shrugged, “I wanted to help you all out too. So it looks like I didn’t really … try.”

But Bimini was smiling still.

“I mean, it’s not all bad, is it? You can now all bake vegan quiches. You can make stuff for your intolerant mates, or your vegan mates, when you get back. That’s more important to me than winning this week - getting you all to be able to make more stuff vegan for your friends. Anything you can bake, I can bake vegan, and I feel like spreading awareness is gonna be better in the long run than me winning a badge!” They waved a fist in the air.

“Don’t you … want to win?” Aurora asked.

Bimini paused for half a second too long before nodding.

“I do want to win, course I do - but this show is a platform as well, know what I mean?”

——

When the producer came in to call them back to the tent for the elimination, Aurora watched as Ellie jogged to Tia to hug her around the waist, both of them holding back to let the others go, Tia wiping tears from her cheeks as they stood there.

As Aurora left them to it, she walked into Lawrence, at the doorway, watching the entrance intently.

“Lozza?” Tayce called to her from the grounds, but Lawrence waved them on.

“I’m coming - see you inside.”

Lawrence and Ellie were last in the tent, the rest of them on their stools while they waited, no one quite sure what they were doing outside. But when Aurora finally watched Lawrence come in with Ellie, both of them had red eyes and Lawrence’s eyeliner was running as they sat down.

Veronica put a hand to her mouth at being called for Star Baker. Aurora clapped her politely, while Tia smiled widely and rested her head on her shoulder, pulling her into a one-armed hug.

But Tia was biting her lip, waiting for the call for the next person to leave the tent. They all knew it was between her and Ellie, and Aurora could hear Lawrence whispering to Ellie, who was staring straight ahead as usual, but she couldn’t make any words out …

“Tia. I’m so sorry, Tia.”

Veronica’s hand, lingering at her mouth, shook as she gasped.

But Tia, her face deadpan as ever, tilted her head. “Are you sure? Positive? I mean, I don’t have any other plans, so …”

Aurora managed a laugh at Tia’s attempt at humour at the situation, but she appeared to be the only one. Bimini’s eyes were downcast as they got up to hug Tia, and Tayce was rubbing Veronica’s back to comfort her. Lawrence had her arms linked around Ellie’s waist while Ellie dabbed her eyes.

“Come on, Els - it’s fine, I knew it would be me -“ Tia wrapped an arm around them both, unable to disentangle Lawrence from her, drifting over to Aurora next, and then Tayce.

Veronica, both hands in hers, stared up at her with eyes pooling with tears, as Tia bent to whisper something in her ear, causing Veronica to snort with laughter and double over, before tugging Tia towards her, wrapping her arms around her waist, Tia dropping kisses on her forehead before they both left the tent for their winning and exit interviews.

“What did Tia say to you?” Aurora asked Veronica later on, when Veronica came back to Carr Hall, her face red and eyes bloodshot.

“Oh,” Veronica snorted again. “It’s nothing, just silly stuff -“

“It must have been good, if it made you perk up?”

“Alright,” Veronica said, sniffing. “She said - she said If I had a badge, I’d be leaving it to you in my will. That was it. I don’t even know why I found it funny, but it was at the time.”

Tayce threw back her head in a laugh. “Only way you’re getting another badge, Vee!”

Veronica blinked before smiling, more like a grimace; but Aurora’s blood had frozen at Tayce’s comment. The languid smile on her face, the flash in her eyes, just made Aurora question Tayce’s intentions even more than she already was.

Tayce had changed.

The woman who had helped her cut and load her brownies only two weeks ago, now tossing verbal barbs at any opportunity. Yesterday about Tia and Ellie. And now to Veronica. And as much as she was madly attracted to Tayce, there was no denying that doubt crept around the edge of Aurora’s mind at this new development, unsure what Tayce was truly thinking.

What would she be saying about me if I’d gone?

——

SIX BAKERS REMAIN

[psyga315]

Some Roses Will Never Bloom: A Rewrite Of Volume 8, Part 1

Never before have I felt so disappointed with the turnout of a RWBY Volume. It had the potential to be extremely good, but it chose mediocrity. Again. It felt like Volume 5 all over again.

I know I should probably wait for the final two episodes, but let’s be fucking honest here. Atlas is done. The plot is finished. These two episodes, if people are to be believed, are to hype for the next Volume and even then, given how RWBY did its “hype” and “payoff” in Volume 8… No, fuck that noise. Those last two episodes will get their own segment called the Volume 9 Character Short. If anything, only scenes with Emerald from those two episodes will be brought over to Volume 8 and if they’re big scenes, like her interacting with Cinder, I’ll make an addendum.

Before we begin, keep in mind that this is not a complete rewrite. If there’s a scene I haven’t mentioned, that’s because it’s good as is and can be left in. Length wise, I’ll try to aim for the same 14 episodes, but minutes wise… Who even counts these anymore?

So, let’s get into the meat and potatoes with a Meta-Rewrite. If this does not interest you, skip ahead to when I start talking about the episodes.

Grimm Expectations

Let’s rewind the clocks back to the hiatus of Volume 7-8. Rooster Teeth is proud to announce a new contest where Grimm entries are submitted and the winner would receive a prize. There was controversy the minute it began and it only got worse when the finalists were called.

So, let’s fix that. In this Meta-Rewrite, Rooster Teeth decide to instead broadens the prize pool to include five winners instead of the one, with no popularity contest to determine the winner. Of course, this doesn’t fix the contest results, which includes a controversial figure. However, because there is no voting involved, it instead becomes a flame war over the design that, let’s be honest, wouldn’t have mattered in the grand scheme of things.

So, yeah, RT uses all five Grimm winners, disregards any fucks that the fanbase has (again) and the only thing I could see happening is if the artist personally reached out to Rooster Teeth and requested it to be removed, to which RT will word it so that it doesn’t backfire in their face.

Alright, now let’s do it.

Divide

We’ll start right where the show left off, with Oscar witnessing the Whale arrive onto Atlas. However, curiously, it is stationary. Oscar asks what’s up with it before Ozpin cryptically tells him that’s what she wants it to do. We don’t need to see a huge montage of Oscar getting to the Crater, but just enough to know how he got there.

We cut to RWBY and co discussing what to do now, especially with Salem making good on her threat. Ruby tries to contact Qrow and Oscar, but she can’t reach them. Pietro and Maria pilot the aircraft down to the same discreet spot they parked in Volume 7. However, as they get off, they’re ambushed by soldiers. Just then, Johanna, May, and Fiona barge in and beat them with an ambush of their own.

“What the hell just happened!?” Johanna barked at Ruby. We’ll cut to fifteen minutes later where they all discuss what happened

“So, Ironwood’s finally lost it.” May mutters. They hear the news and see their wanted posters. Most notably, they see that Robyn and Penny are added to the list and that she and Qrow have a big “ARRESTED” sign over them. However, with Oscar, there’s a clear big red X over his face, causing Ruby to fret. Jaune gets upset and punches a wall, blaming himself for leaving Oscar behind on both occasions.

I don’t think Jaune would blame Ruby at this point, since 1) he, at this point, knows better than to point fingers and 2) it’s more his character to beat himself up rather than someone else.

It’d still be Yang, but she’d be joined by Ren. Yang brings up how Ruby’s leadership led them to this situation and Ren mentions how they destroyed Ironwood’s trust, not knowing what was really said up there back in “Gravity”. Ruby told Yang about how they not only went behind Ironwood’s back but also theirs by telling Robyn about the Amity Tower and thus burned their bridge with Ironwood, only for Blake to go on full blast and say what Critics have been saying for the entire hiatus:

“YOU GUYS ARE ACTING JUST LIKE THE WHITE FANG!”

She explains how they’ve done the exact same things that the White Fang had done, taking lives, stealing vehicles, but she adds the extra caveat of bringing up how they’ve also borrowed from Ozpin’s playbook. She confesses to being the one who planned on telling them about Amity.

However, Johanna breaks up the fight and tells them flat out: doesn’t matter what they did, they need to worry more about what to do. This is when they argue more about what’s important: Amity or Mantle. The team splits up the same way, since it is integral for their arcs to be like this and not go with the obvious “Ren cared about saving the world so he’s going for Amity and Nora cared about Mantle so she will help Mantle.”

Ruby frets more, since “this is what Salem wants”, only for Yang to retort: “well, she’s already getting that right now…”, which stings Ruby since she feels like it meant her splitting off with Ruby while she actually meant what happened with Ironwood. We’re not gonna do the “future” stuff. I feel like that should happen naturally instead of confusing people.

Just before they go, though, Ironwood calls Penny and tells her that Salem is here. Penny is about to answer when Ruby takes the phone away and tells him to fuck off, only for Ironwood to go “hey, people are going to die if you’re acting like a doofus about it!” Ironwood tries to talk more, but Ruby hangs up on him.

We smash cut to Ironwood growling in frustration, looking at the arm he lost in order to stop Watts. He gets a solemn look, pondering to himself about how far he must go in order to save the world. His arm trembles and thinks back to shooting Oscar. He begins to have second thoughts about what he had done, though they’re brief as the Councillors came in. During their rant, Ironwood grabs Sleet by the throat and drags his ass out to a window where they see the whale.

“YOU SEE THAT!? That is what we tried to protect the world from and now it’s at our front door. That’s why I’ve enacted Martial Law.” He then tosses Sleet to the guards and tell him to lock the Councilmen up. “You two have gotten in my way before. I won’t let it happen again.” As they get dragged away, he looks over to Winter and apologizes. Had he not arranged for her to be the Winter Maiden, she wouldn’t have been injured.

Winter reassures him and tells him that he was the only person who has given her purpose in life after her father ruined it. Ironwood is both touched and horrified with that comment, especially once the Ace Ops come, having done their grieving for Clover. Harriet also affirms her faith in Ironwood and tells him that Clover died for his Kingdom. Ironwood gives a moment to think… Closing his eyes.

“So… If I’ve led you all onto the path of hell…” He opens them as we see the light in his eyes disappear, followed by the sound of a loud, distinctive click. “Then there’s no other choice but to keep moving forward.”

And as we get our first official look at Mettle, the opening plays out.

Refuge

The villain scene from Episode 1 is moved over to here, but Cinder brings up why they haven’t made their move yet. Salem brings up that Tyrian’s report of the situation has confirmed that Ironwood has taken her bait and is now the greatest weapon they have. Let him destroy Atlas from the inside out and then clean up the mess. She then brings the relic to the Hound and has him sniff for Oscar’s scent.

The rest of the episode plays out like usual, with Ruby and Yang’s teams doing their thing, but with Oscar at the Crater, he’s not there for the scenes. He does still have his chat with Ozpin about how they’ll be one soon, however. He sees Yang, Ren, and Jaune arrive with people and he is elated to see them. He is elated to see them and asks what happened with the others. Yang sums up and then Oscar asks what happened to Qrow, Clover, and Robyn.

Cut to the jailbirds and Qrow saying how he wants to murder Ironwood. The Councilmen are tossed in while they extract Watts.

The Hound Scene gets changed somewhat, as we see it attacking Oscar in the middle of the Crater, bringing people to harm against the Hound. This furthers the reason why they couldn’t just shoot the Grimm, since the Hound threatens the lives of the refuges in the Crater. We end our episode there.

Strings

So, here’s where I think we’re going to make the big changes and axe a subplot. While the premise of Penny being hacked and her aura resisting it is good, I feel like, of the subplots that need to be cut, this would be the one. We can dedicate more of this time to her conflict with being the Protector of Mantle and now being the Winter Maiden, in other words being the Protector of Atlas.

Meanwhile, Nora, Ruby, and Blake all have their doubts. Ruby and Nora are obvious, but Blake has trouble deciding if she made the right call in returning to RWBY. Weiss, in a Tsundere way, brings up how she is a very integral part of the team. Blake then brings up how, if it weren’t for her, then they wouldn’t have had a hard time getting to Atlas, blaming herself for both their rejection at Argus and how Adam ruined their plans in the hijacking.

Weiss, however, wants none of that. While this was Ruby’s plan, Weiss takes charge of the operation due to Ruby being emotionally compromised. She gets a taste of being a leader in this episode, one she had wanted in Volume 1.

During this, Ironwood discusses matters with Watts, where they talk about the possibility of hacking Penny. For this rewrite, I think keeping the ‘Watts is working with Ironwood’ angle, complete with Ironwood having guns pointed to him, would benefit Ironwood’s arc and show how low he’s going. Not just working with one of Salem’s thugs, but also holding them at gun point. Ironwood justifies it by saying that this is Watts’s ‘punishment’ for the crimes he’s done. Watts, however, plays it by ear and waits for the opportune time for a backstab. That and he wants to stick it to Pietro.

The rest of the episode plays out like normal, but we get that ‘made a deal with the darkness’ scene as Watts is dragged back to his cell, Harriet has a hissy fit, and Robyn is like ‘you’re looking for someone to blame’. As the Ace Ops and Guards leave, Watts brings Qrow’s ‘we kill the man who put us here’ idea back to him and says he’s interested in his offer.

Fault

We open right where we leave off, as Watts reveals that he’s only getting close enough to Ironwood to acquire the right tools to escape. He then proceeds to dangle the carrot in front of Qrow.

“We’ve all been screwed over by Ironwood in one form or another. He disrupted your business, abandoned your town, betrayed your Headmaster.” The last part gets to Qrow and he lashes out. “We all want him dead, so… are you in or are you out?”

“Preposterous!” Jacques, to Robyn’s surprise, beat her to the punch. “Let’s not forget that you’ve done your fair share of screwing. Believe me, I had my experience. I know better than to trust you.”

“You’ve trusted Ironwood, right? And look where it got you. All of you.” That comment hangs in the air.

“We wanted Ironwood out for some time, but not like this! Are you mad?” Sleet asked. Robyn is visibly horrified at what Watts is suggesting and is the next to speak up.

“Jacques has a point for once in his life. Why should we trust you when you’re the reason Mantle is in this mess in the first place?” Then Qrow raises his hand.

“I want to hear him out.” Qrow said.

“What? What do you mean? You realize he works with-”

“I know! But remember who we’re dealing with. This prison… It’s not like the kind of prisons I’ve seen, especially in Atlas. No other people but us, only the top of Ironwood’s army are allowed to check in, and I’m pretty sure the guards aren’t allowed to give you that shiner. No… This isn’t our holding cell. It’s an execution cell, and we’re just waiting for Ironwood to drop the axe.”

We end on that implication as we see the episode play out like normal. While I like to have Ren bring up Pyrrha, I think the “cheated into Beacon” thing is big enough and we’ll need to unravel that bundle of worms. Instead of the “yeah, Ruby” scene, we could have Yang ask Jaune what he meant and Jaune reveals his fake transcripts. He also reveals that, for a time, he blamed Pyrrha’s death on his inexperience and that he knew about Pyrrha using her Semblance on his shield some time later. Yang, however, isn’t really in a position to pat Jaune’s back.

Meanwhile, the group crash at Whitley’s mansion, but Weiss doesn’t immediately point a sword at him. She’s tempted to as Whitley complains about having to harbour criminals without an explanation as to what’s going on, but then she notices that… he’s afraid. She then remembers Willow’s words to her and calmly goes “If you’re willing, I’ll explain everything. Please. Just help her.”

And we end on the Grimm River.

Amity

This episode is mostly the same, but with two exceptions. One, Ironwood does not, in any way, try to interfere with the broadcast. This had been the thing he was working on the whole time and, albeit without the Ironwood could no longer be trusted bit (which he looks solemnly away to), is pretty much what he wanted. And two, Watts ‘fakes’ hacking Penny.

He later reveals to his coup that there’s no way to hack Penny, bringing up how they had her schematics back in Volume 3 but were unable to activate the virus for her. What he really did was force a reboot and lied out of his ass about how it was a failed attempt. He then reveals the broken phone and offers the escape plan one last time.

Midnight

Here we are. One of the biggest episodes in Volume 8. The big backstory reveal for Cinder…

And we’re instead going to make it about Hazel, so instead, it’s going to be…

Gingerbread

We open with twins, lost in the woods. The elder reassures the younger that everything will be fine. They were abandoned by their parents to line their bellies and forced to fend for themselves. There, they come across a house that looked like it was made of gingerbread, with eagled eyed viewers being able to spot a young Cinder being carted off.

A blind woman greets the kids and brings them into the house. We know the schtick here, though instead of fattening the kids up to be eaten, she toughens them up to be sold to wealthy people who use them as child labourers. Gretchen finds out about this but she gets captured and is about to be killed to be silenced. Hazel, in a fury, ends up awakening his Semblance and, using a Dust Crystal, sets the house ablaze as they escape.

A montage plays out of them surviving however they can, even joining some bandits and raiding towns. However, during one such raid, they’re stopped by a young Qrow and have them be brought to Ozpin, which plays out similarly to how Ruby got inducted into Beacon.

We cut to Oscar chatting with Ozpin about Salem’s plan and how it seemed to be working before getting the idea to do the same to her. As Hazel walks in and gets upset that Ozpin casually says hello, Ozpin asks: “Why? Why do you follow Salem?”

“You know why. Did you tell him the full story?”

We cut back to another montage where we see that Hazel and Gretchen are part of the same team and they were the best years of their life. Unfortunately, they go on a mission to Mountain Glenn where it just so happens to be the time a mad scientist was fucking around there. They try to stop the Grimm from overrunning it, but it seems hopeless. Hazel, as the team leader, pulls the team back. However, Ozpin gives them the order to not run away and to hold the line. Gretchen follows this to a T and sacrifices herself in vain.

This devastates Hazel and causes him to drop out of Beacon, bearing a grudge against Ozpin. Not only that, but it paints some parallels between Hazel, Qrow, and Jaune, as all of them had friends they lost to the orders of a Headmaster who they despised. Qrow teeters in the middle (he talks big about killing Ironwood but hasn’t committed to it yet) between Jaune (who accepted Pyrrha’s choice and lets go of his hatred) and Hazel (“OZPIIIIIN!”). It also presents a dark parallel to the current story, since Atlas and Mantle are currently undergoing a similar siege, but it’s Ruby who insists on holding the line.

Ozpin admits that this was just one of his many mistakes, but asks again why he decided to work with Salem because of it, when she was the one behind the Grimm. Hazel then answers the obvious:

“I tried to kill her.”

We then get to see Hazel beat her senseless in a flashback, only to reform from dust and taunt him. Eventually, he gave up as Salem comforts him before revealing that Ozpin has sacrificed people like him for one huge lie (as she does this, Sacrifice plays). He then swears his allegiance to her if it means there’d be no more Gretchens.

Ozpin cuts the flashback by retorting that she’s planning to bring-

Salem comes in. The show’s about to start.

Cut to Weiss as she enters Whitley’s room. She notices that he just finished calling someone and suspects he’s ratting out on them. Whitely denies this and calls Weiss out for being overtly protective. Weiss counters by saying that she grew up in a hostile home and can’t really trust any Schnee but her sister, which she begins to doubt.

Whitley brings up that she barely had it as bad as he did and talks of his turmoil of living with the parents alone while Winter was at Atlas and Weiss was at Beacon. Between his mother’s drunken rambles and his father’s angry rants, he barely had time to live his own life. He just lets Weiss have it for ditching him before he breaks down and realizes that, no, he’s just jealous because she got to be free while he was still stuck in the cage. Weiss remembers when she was grounded and stripped of her title and realizes “oh… shit.”

Then the doorbell rings and, surprise, it’s Klein. Whitely explains that they need a doctor for Nora and without Jacques, he figured to invite the person he fired just to further spite his ass. He and Weiss begin to rekindle an old flame that they never ignited.

Back with Salem, the scene plays out like normal, but when we see Cinder get tortured, we see flashes of Cinder having a shock collar, hinting to her big backstory event. Then Salem has a small speech.

“It would appear that we have been brought forth into the light as monsters and villains. So, why not play that part and show them why dear old Ozma had to keep me a secret for so long… It’s time.”

Suddenly, Beringels fly out of Monstra and Zerg Rush the shields while the Grimm River activates and rushes forth, destroying the hut that RJY were at and almost killing them. Jaune sends out a distress call with his scroll as they try to avoid getting washed away in the water. They see that it’s heading to Mantle and that the plan by Salem is a two-prong attack to further force the division between Mantle and Atlas by putting them both in peril.

During this, Ren tries desperately to activate his Semblance, but just couldn’t. He panics, he worries, he sees Grimm emerge from the River to try and kill them and he just can’t make his Semblance work. He asks why now of all times must this happen. He closes his eyes and tries to think… Then sees petals on himself. Before he has any time to figure out what happened, they see a plane arrive and blast the River, stopping it in its tracks. Just before Jaune is about to thank their savior, they see that it’s Winter and the Ace-Ops…

War

The Beringels break through the shields and invade, destroying much of Atlas and overrunning the city, killing people on-screen. The rest of the scenes play out, however, when we cut to RWB, we see Weiss is trying to restrain Ruby from running out there, saying that she could be arrested or killed and Ruby responds with wanting to do the right thing. May interjects and asks why they bother saving Atlas when all they do is laugh at the misfortune of others. She’s basically the “Let Atlas Fall” part of the fanbase.

And this is where RWB give their counter arguments.

Weiss says how, even though the elite are snobby twits, Atlas is not exclusive to just them. May and her were just born with silver spoons in their mouths but that doesn’t excuse them from leaving everyone else on Atlas to die, bringing up how the Mantleans they saved were also on Atlas.

Blake brings up that, yes, Atlas has done bad things in the past, but so did every Kingdom at one point or another, bringing up Mantle’s role in the Great War, so to say that Atlas deserves to burn is to basically say Mantle deserves to burn.

Ruby then uses her “there are no sides” bit, but also blurts out that the whole situation was her fault and that she’s at the very least trying to fix it. And that starts by heading straight to the Whale and beating Salem herself.

The whale scene plays out the same, as does RJY’s scene right up until they plan to blow up the Whale. Yang and Jaune argue against it while Ren vouches for Atlas, saying how this may be the only chance they have at beating Salem, proposing to Winter to go ahead into the whale to scout it. This leads to the argument about replacing Oscar which pisses Ren something fierce as he finally drops the Pyrrha bomb on their ass.

“You say that like we haven’t lost a team mate before!” Boom. In a flash of light, Ren could see clearly. While muted colors were around him, he can see the petals around everyone. Jaune has blue petals, Yang has red petals, and Harriet has burning crimson petals. He could hear what each petal represents. He hears crying when he sees blue, he hears screaming when he sees red, when looking at Winter, he hears a bunch of different things as he sees multi-colored petals.

He sees that most of the Ace Ops don’t have a consistent feeling. Not even Vine and Elm, who he can’t help but see himself and Nora in their places. Then he looks to his own petals. Pure white as he hears exhaling: calmness. He’s reached a zen state, making peace with what he had felt in Volume 7: A desire to stop Salem and prevent what happened to him and Nora from happening to other people.

Hopefully that gives a slightly better explanation at what his Semblance does without directly telling the audience. However, he doesn’t use this to basically read the script and tell the audience what people feel because, reading the dialogue, it just feels forced. “You’re going to be a good guy because I have magic petal seeing powers!” Instead, he plays therapist.

“I understand why you think people are replaceable. I guess it comes with the territory of being in the army.” “If you can’t even gauge what your partner is feeling, you can’t work as a full team.” “What did you hope to accomplish when you joined the Ace Ops?” “Who are you trying to prove yourself to?”

I feel like that’s a lot more in character for Ren. As for Winter, she doesn’t go “I outrank you” but rather appeals to Harriet’s blood thirsty nature by saying that they’re basically sentencing them to a trial by Grimm, even tricking Harriet into agreeing that, should they survive and free Oscar, that they’d be let go, kinda playing into how she’s the Hare.

Back at the manor, Weiss gets ready to accompany Ruby. Willow approaches her and they have a small chat about what to do now that Jacques is arrested. Willow brings up that Jacques was promptly fired from the SDC due to his treason and, as a result, his previous rulings are called into question, including stripping Weiss of her title. She lowkey implies that Weiss should return and become the proper heiress to the SDC once more, even resisting the lure of the bottle to prove that they can make it right.

Weiss, however, looks to Ruby and Blake getting ready, then says to her “thanks, but… I think I’d rather be a team player than a team leader.” The two have a small, proper mother-daughter bond before BOOM!

It’s Penny, and she says that she’s sorry.

And that’ll wrap up this half of the rewrite. There are a lot of unaltered or even minor altered stuff, I know, but the front half of Volume 8 was alright to say the least. I think the back half of Volume 8 will be where major changes for this rewrite will happen. So, tune in for part 2.

[apex-academy]

Chapter 5: Caring Is a Hazard to Your Health (#18)

The second round begins. Or the second... whatever. I don’t pay attention to bracket terms, I just play when they tell me to play.

Not much point in switching horses mid-stream, so I stick with the blob knight vampire guy. Yuki takes the big-eyed pink thing again. And apparently the other half of us don’t care for that strategy, because Ichiriki goes for Pikachu—yes, I actually recognized that one, shut up—and Kanagi switches to some ripped martial arts guy. 

Aidan picks out another stage. I vaguely wonder if he let himself lose, since he’s the one who’s actually played this thing before. But I guess it’s harder to work the controller at a competitive speed one-handed. He doesn’t seem to be taking his loss particularly hard, so it’s not worth thinking about too much.

The countdown starts, and off we go. Yuki summarily launches herself off the edge of a cloud and into the void.

“Oh... Wrong way.”

“...”

The rest of us resume beating each other up while she’s busy regenerating or respawning or whatever it is. I don’t know what the heck move Ichiriki keeps spamming, but it’s sure doing a number on us.

“MY GUY STARTED DOING SOMETHING WEIRD what the crap.”

Kanagi keeps smashing buttons, but apparently she’s having more trouble controlling it than her last choice. I manage to knock her off the screen. And then Ichiriki takes me out immediately afterward.

“What even is this game.”

Chaos, but at least having half the players means I can freaking tell where I am without having to whip out the bat wings. Unfortunately, that does not save me from getting pummeled off the screen by some freaking background character that isn’t even one of our guys. 

There isn’t much more of a struggle before Ichiriki is the last animal-thing standing.

“And that makes Mister Tokino our first finalist! Only one spot left, and he can still take it all right now if he wins the next match!”

“This is fun!”

“Yeah, like, of course it’s fun, you’re winning.”

“But you won’t take me out next round, dude!”

“I guess we’ll have to see~! Hee hee!”

I’d ask why he’s laughing like that, but at this point I’m giving up on asking questions.

And for the last battle of this round, Kanagi switches again to some guy in a pink hoodie. Guess she had enough of karate guy.

Either way, it’s onto the next round. Everything’s going fine until the stage starts crumbling beneath us.

“Why do we have to keep changing stages?”

“You’ll have to stay on your toes if you want to win this tournament, Miss Kogamino!”

“Apparently so.”

If nothing else, we manage to gang up on Ichiriki and throw him out before he can zap us all to death. Kanagi then proceeds to knock out Yuki’s guy, which was apparently some kind of accident.

“Oh my gosh?”

“I LOVE THIS DUDE!”

“That’s nice.”

Down to the two of us now, and it stays pretty close—until Kanagi misses a punch and it somehow launches her off the stage completely. She just stares at the screen as her character goes up in flames, or whatever that’s supposed to be.

“What the...”

“THIS DUDE SUCKS!”

“........”

She throws her controller to the floor as Aidan announces me as finalist and declares another intermission.

“You!”

“Me?”

“Don’t think this is over!”

She whips around, nearly smacking me with her hair tie.

“And you too!”

“.......”

“I WILL DESTROY BOTH OF YOU!”

“At what, exactly?”

Kanagi looks around the room before swinging her arm around to point at one of the machines.

“THAT!”

I squint long enough to make out “Centipede” written across the top of it.

“Is that even a game you’ve played before?”

“I’LL STILL CRUSH YOU!!”

“Okay.”

“Hummmmm, Kanagi...”

“I can still make you some dorayaki tomorrow...”

“It’s not the same.”

“Chill out, brah.” Kaichi claps a hand on her shoulder. “Need t’ drown your sorrows in some grinds?”

“I don’t even know what that means!”

“Food?”

“Oh.”

“Yeah, sure, sounds legit.”

And off they go to the popcorn table. I’m out of disbelieving commentary for the day, so I’m just gonna get another drink. By the time I fetch that, conversations have broken out again. Pretty sure I’m gonna get recruited into one eventually, so I at least avoid the group with Tsunyasha and Kanagi.

“But you’re not having any trouble...?”

“Everything’s perfectly under control. There’s nothing to worry about.”

“.......”

“What are we worrying about?”

Aidan wheels back a bit to give me space.

“Oh, Miss Kurokame was just checking in on me.”

“Hummmmm...”

“It’s at least harder to wash your hair, isn’t it...?”

“What do you mean?”

“One-handed and all...”

“And, hummm...”

“You can kind of tell just by looking... Sorry.”

“Oh?”

Well, hard to say much of anything in this light, but I guess it’s on the greasier side, sure. Not smelling too great over here, either, but considering we have eight fairly active people and four weird flavors of popcorn crammed into this room, I’d be wary of pinning that on anyone in particular.

“I mean, you are still showering and everything, right?”

“I assure you that’s the last thing I have any interest in skipping out on.”

Can’t counter that.

“You could’ve just said yes.”

“He doesn’t tend to ‘just’ say anything...”

“Yes, yes, the point has been made.”

He opens his mouth to continue, but I interrupt.

“But there’s no bench in there, right? And the baths are pretty deep. Can you stand long enough to get in either?”

“Um. I can’t stand at the moment, no, but...”

“I don’t think the wheelchair would fit in there, either, right...?”

Aidan sucks in a sharp breath.

“Fine, okay, I’ve been mostly subsisting off hand sanitizer and deodorant for the time being and it’s not entirely effective, but!”

“I’ve already rigged up some systems to help, I’m just making sure they’re absolutely safe before I try them!”

“It’s slow going with few tools available and the situation as it is, but progress is progress, and it’s nothing to be that concerned about, all right?”

“...”

“...So you haven’t bathed at all since you came back.”

“No and I’m dying on the inside a little bit but it’s FINE.”

He takes a deep breath.

“As previously stated, the solution is forthcoming, and if all we’re going to do this break is fuss about it, I might as well start the tournament finals already.”

“There’s a public bath now, though, right...?”

“Would that work?”

He’s getting all fidgety now. Can’t stand or stand still, apparently.

He sighs. “The layout would be easier, yes, but a structure that size is going to be far more of a drowning hazard when I can’t really guarantee I would stay conscious.”

“And that’s the reason for changing the lock, right? Have you seriously been passing out that much?”

“No!!! I just like to be prepared!”

So you prioritized that over showering when you don’t even like to handle papers other people have touched. Right.

“Hummmm... It’s a public bath, though, right...? So you could have someone else help...”

“Who, exactly? I’m not sure Mister Attenborough is in condition to handle the heat of that room for long, I’m afraid I don’t tr... care for Mister Tokino’s company all that much, and the circumstances may not be terribly safe for Mister Riseiin, either.”

I guess a girl wouldn’t be a valid solution? Well, I’m not volunteering.

“Hey, ‘m I being trash-talked o’er here?”

Right, we’re not exactly alone. I shuffle to the side so Kaichi can fit in the little circle we’ve got going.

“Oh, no...! Just... talking?”

I peer at Kaichi for a second.

“He does literally carry a flotation device with him everywhere he goes. The bath’s not that big.”

“Yes, but...”

“Oh...! And he’s technically a medical professional...!”

“I would like to argue that being a professional involves more than knowledge and talent.”

“That’s fair.”

“ ’m trying t’ use my context clues, but you’re not making ‘t easy, brahs.”

“It’s noth—”

“We were wondering if you could... look after Aidan in the bathhouse so he won’t get hurt if he falls asleep in there...”

Aidan’s mouth twists like he was this close to yelling “MOM” just now.

“I mean, ‘s chill with me.”

He waves his notebook.

“And if ‘s anything embarrassing, I won’t remember it ‘n five minutes, anyway.”

“.......”

“Well there’s no time to head there tonight regardless, so there’s no need for us to discuss this right now!!”

“I’ll consider it, okay?”

“But we’re here tonight to have a good time, not to worry about every little thing, so if you would please! Let! The topic! Rest!!”

Before anyone can interrupt him again, he raises his voice, cupping his hand toward the rest of the room.

“Who’s ready for the final match of the tournament?!”

Apparently Kanagi’s feeling good enough to whoop along with Ichiriki.

“I’m half of the final match, do I get a say?”

Regardless, it looks like it’s go time. I’ve had enough of whatever that was, anyway. Seems like we got somewhere? Still, I can’t decide if I should be concerned or not, and it leaves me vaguely distracted for the match. Which is only compounded by the fact Ichiriki chose yet another character, who goes flying around on motorcycles and...

“Did I just get eaten?”

I don’t even know anymore. I end up losing, but I can’t say I’m disappointed. This whole night has been so surreal I’m not sure I’m capable of feeling that.

Fun? Maybe. Hard to say when the whole world feels muted, like everything is behind some thick pane of glass. But it’s still there, I guess. I’m still close enough to know what’s going on.

It could be worse.

[BACK] [NEXT]

[giggly-squiggily]

The New Champion

Hey! So, this is a request for the wonderful @serchooke! He really gave me a prompt that I’d never thought I could do, but I enjoyed it so much and am now ready to share it with you all!

Summary: Victor is the new champion of Galar. It’s been a few years, and while he’s enjoyed himself immensely, he’s starting to miss the freedom of roaming the region. With the new Champion tournament forming this year, will he continue to hold down the position, or will a new challenger present themselves.

I hope you all like it! X3

It had been a few years since Victor had taken the champion place of Galar. A few years of endless victories and matches. While Victor was happy with the role as Champion, he couldn’t help but begin to feel...stagnant. He missed his previous life, where he and Hop would roam the Galar region for new Pokemon and stronger challenges.He missed the thrill of a challenging opponent, and the possible risk of losing. To be honest, he even missed his campsite. The smell of fresh curry filling the area as he and his Pokemon feasted, training and napping under the stars of the twilight sky.

Looking up at the poster, he felt his heart skip with anticipation. Maybe this year’s championship would provide him with the battle he longed for. One where he would really be put to the test. Maybe..maybe someone else could take the throne. Victor thought back to all the postcards from Leon when the older man stepped down from the championship role. They were all of the ex-champion in different regions, from Kanto’s Charizard farm to Alola’s Malasada shop. In every photo, he seemed so happy, so free. Victor wondered to himself if he would feel like that if someone beat him.

He really hoped so.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Don’t be so nervous! You made it this far! Just one more match!” Bede said, giving Allister’s shoulder a squeeze. The boy nodded, though he knew without his mask, it wasn’t very convincing. “I know...it’s just. Crumbs, I didn’t think I’d get this far…” It had been a few years since Victor became the new champion of Galar region. Allister never thought of trying to become the next champion before, but after some encouragement from his friends, he decided to give it a shot.

“What are you even talking about? Of course you made it this far!” His friend reminded him, violet eyes proud. “Your an incredible trainer and gym leader. Who knows? You might even beat Victor!” Allister laughed softly, feeling his face warm with the fairy leader’s appraisal. “Okay, okay. Let’s not get too far ahead of ourselves. Victor’s incredible when it comes to battling. It’s gonna take a miracle to beat him.”

An arm slumped over Allister’s shoulders than, making the younger boy jump slightly. “Give yourself more credit, Allister! You’re starting to sound like me!” Piers grinned at the shorter boy, just as happy as Bede. On the ghost trainer’s other side, Bea smiled encouragingly. “You are so strong, Allister. Become the first Ghost-type champion! I know you can do it!” The shy boy felt his chest bloom with warmth at his small found family’s support.

“Will the finalist please enter the gym stadium for the champion battle at this time. Thank you.” The speakers announced, making Allister jump. “That’s for me. It’s time.” Bea hugged him tightly to her chest. Piers ruffled his black hair. Marnie, who was beside Piers, slipped in and hugged him tightly as well. “Good luck, Al!” She said against him. Finally, Bede hugged him tightly, reaching out and poking Allister in the belly, earning a small yelp. “For good luck.” Bede teased, laughing at the Ghost boy’s blush. With one final goodbye, Allister shook out his nerves, raised his chin, and entered the stadium, the screams of his fans filling his ears and motivating his steps.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Victor looked over at his opponent, his brown eyes widening with pleasant surprise at Allister’s entrance. “Allister! It’s been too awhile.” The ghost trainer smiled shyly, his stance strong. “It has. It’s really good to see you, Victor.” The two nodded at each other once more, before retreating to their places on the field. The champion put on his game face, eyes determined as he pulled out his first Pokemon. “As the Champion of the Galar region, I formally challenge you to a battle!”

Allister nodded, pulling out his own Poke ball. “Very well. Let’s do this!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Cheers ran across the stadium as Allister sent out his final Pokemon. Both he and Victor were at the final push of the battle, both matching each other up well with their Pokemon choices. While Allister’s team were Ghost based, he was smart to prepare with coverage moves and counter attacks for Victor’s more diverse team. Before him, Gengar turned to face his trainer, red eyes gleaming with determination. Allister nodded, his own expression growing strong, He faced Victor, who’s last Pokemon; a Rillaboom, stood tall and proud. Allister could practically see the tension in Gengar’s posture. This was like the gym battle all those years ago. It was incredibly close, but in the end, Victor had taken the win.

“You got this Gengar!” Allister’s soft voice made Gengar’s ears twitch, and the Pokemon relaxed, grinning it’s signature smile once more. They were prepared. They had their secret weapon! With a quick transformation, Gengar was Gigamaxed, looming across the field and staring down everyone around it. Victor smiled, Gigamaxing his own Pokemon. Rilaboon stood just as tall, banging it’s drum as its enormous size let out a roar. This was it. This was the final match! 

That’s when the plot twist happened. While Allister had prepared his Pokemon for the match before him, so did Victor. “Max Darkness!” He commanded, making Allister internally panic. Crumbs! He forgot about Rillaboom’s Brutal Swing! As the Rillaboom began to gather it’s attack, Allister looked over at his Gengar. The Pokemon’s eyes swung down at him, a look of determination in their red gleam. “Survive, Gengar!” Allister softly whispered, before facing his opponent. A blast of darkness hit the giant Gengar, and for the briefest of moments, Allister was sure he was gonna lose. When it cleared though, there stood Gengar, shaky, but still standing. He survived! He took the last hit with only one HP left! Allister was amazed. He reached in his bag for a potion, but stopped, realizing he only had one opportunity to end this. He looked up at Gengar, who blinked, ready. “Gengar! Use Max Fire!”

Victor looked surprised, but pleased. The crowd cheered as Gengar summoned a large amount of fire, ready to shoot down its opponent. Allister was glad he taught his ghostly friend how to use Fire Punch. Bea was right. You never knew when it would come in handy. The ball of flames hit Rillaboom with a force of a critical hit, sending it backwards with its strength. Once the fire cleared, there was a loud boom, and Rillaboom shrunk down to its original size before fainting. The battle was over. Allister had won.

The crowd went wild! Fans and friends lost their minds as they cheered for Allister. The ghost boy stood in utter shock, not expecting to win at all. He did it..his team did it! He looked up to face Victor- only to be engulfed in his arms. “You did it! My god you did it!” Victor said, his voice choked with proud tears. “I’m so damn proud of you.” Allister hugged him back just as tightly, barely remembering he wasn’t wearing his mask as he too felt tears roll down his cheeks. He hugged Victor just as tightly, overwhelmed with emotion. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

By the end of the ceremony, Allister’s arms and ribs felt like dust from the endless hugs, cheeks felt like they had a permanent lip imprint from all the kisses, but he didn’t mind. He was beyond thrilled that he won. Gengar stood by, recovered and proud, basking in all its glory. Gengar clearly felt like a little celebrity, and it made Allister giggle seeing the Ghost pose for a picture here and there.

“So now what? What will you do, Victor?” Allister asked the former champion as the two escaped the stadium for some fresh air. Victor looked thoughtful for a moment before smiling. “I think I’m gonna follow Leon’s footsteps.” He pulled out the Postcards from his backpack, smiling at the older man posed in each one. “He traveled the world, and so will I! Besides, Hop has been begging me to join him on discovering new Pokemon. I think it’s time.” He grinned and put the photos away, reaching over and squeezing Allister’s shoulder. “You’re gonna make Galar proud, Allister. I know you will. I finally get to tell everyone my baby brother is the first ever Ghost champion!” 

Allister felt his eyes well up at the sentimental statement. His “baby brother”...he considers the ghost boy family. Allister reached out and hugged him again. “I’ll make you proud. Everyday!” Victor smiled and patted his head, his voice soft.

“You already do.”

AHHH! This was so much fun to write! I hope you all like it!

[achrisstevenson]

The Illustrious Wendy Van Camp Interview!

Author Interview: Chris J. Breedlove

October 23, 2019

Wendy Van Camp

2 Comments

I asked Author Chris Breedlove what his motto for being a writer was.  He answered:

A Writer is… A humble, receptive student and negotiator But the heart that beats within his/her breast Is a determined savage Unfamiliar with surrender

Please welcome this savvy science fiction author to No Wasted Ink.

My name is Chris Harold Stevenson and I’m 67 years young. I go by the pen name Christy J. Breedlove for my YA books and stories. Yes, I changed gender entirely. That’s another story.

My early writing accomplishment were multiple hits within a few years: In my first year of writing back in 1987, I wrote three SF short stories that were accepted by major slick magazines which qualified me for the Science Fiction Writers of America, and at the same time achieved a Finalist award in the L. Ron Hubbard Writers of the Future Contest. This recognition garnered me a top gun SF agent at the time, Richard Curtis Associates. My first novel went to John Badham (Director) and the producers, the Cohen Brothers. Only an option, but an extreme honor. The writer who beat me out of contention for a feature movie was Michael Crichton’s Jurassic Park. My book was called Dinothon.

A year after that I published two best-selling non-fiction books and landed on radio, TV, in every library in the U.S. and in hundreds of newspapers.

I have been trying to catch that lightning in a bottle ever since. My YA dystopian novel, The Girl They Sold to the Moon won the grand prize in a publisher’s YA novel writing contest, went to a small auction and got tagged for a film option. So, My latest release is Sceamcatcher: Web World, and it’s showing some promise. I’m getting there, I hope!

When did you first consider yourself a writer?

I considered myself a writer when I published the two shorts in Amazing Stories magazine. I actually considered myself an author after my first non-fiction book was published and hit the media. It seems I had to have legitimate credits in order to claim such status.

Can you share a little about your current book with us?

I can give you the basic summary, or the extended blurb:

When seventeen-year-old Jory Pike cannot shake the hellish nightmares of her parent’s deaths, she turns to an old family heirloom, a dream catcher. Even though she’s half-blood Chippewa, Jory thinks old Native American lore is so yesterday, but she’s willing to give it a try. However, the dream catcher has had its fill of nightmares from an ancient and violent past. After a sleepover party, and during one of Jory’s most horrific dream episodes, the dream catcher implodes, sucking Jory and her three friends into its own world of trapped nightmares. They’re in an alternate universe—locked inside of an insane web world filled with murders, beasts, and thieves. How can they find the center of the web where all good things are allowed to pass? Where is the light of salvation? Are they in hell?

What inspired you to write this book?

It all started with a dream catcher. This iconic item, which is rightfully ingrained in Indian lore, is a dream symbol respected by the culture that created it. It is mystifying, an enigma that that prods the imagination. Legends about the dream catcher are passed down from multiple tribes. There are variations, but the one fact that can be agreed upon is that it is a nightmare entrapment device, designed to sift through evil thoughts and images and only allow pleasant and peaceful dreams to enter into the consciousness of the sleeper.

I wondered what would happen to a very ancient dream catcher that was topped off with dreams and nightmares. What if the nightmares became too sick or deathly? What if the web strings could not hold any more visions? Would the dream catcher melt, burst, vanish, implode? I reasoned that something would have to give if too much evil was allowed to congregate inside of its structure. I found nothing on the Internet that offered a solution to this problem—I might have missed a relevant story, but nothing stood out to me. Stephen King had a story called Dream Catcher, but I found nothing in it that was similar to what I had in mind. So I took it upon myself to answer such a burning question. Like too much death on a battlefield could inundate the immediate location with lost and angry spirits, so could a dream catcher hold no more of its fill of sheer terror without morphing into something else, or opening up a lost and forbidden existence. What would it be like to be caught up in another world inside the webs of a dream catcher, and how would you get out? What would this world look like? How could it be navigated? What was the source of the exit, and what was inside of it that threatened your existence? Screamcatcher: Web World, the first in the series, was my answer. I can only hope that I have done it justice.

Do you have a specific writing style?

I’m a fruit salad of other known writer’s influences. Oh, like what I consider stylists: Poul Anderson, Virgin Planet, Peter Benchley, The Island and Jaws, Joseph Wambaugh, The Onion Field and Black Marble, Michael Crichton, Jurassic Park, Alan Dean Foster, Icerigger trilogy, and some Stephen King. Anne Rice impresses with just about anything she has written. I think it’s the humor and irony that attracts me the most–and it’s all character-related

How did you come up with the title of this book?

After I had the idea/premise for the book, having researched similar works, if any, I found that I had something very unique. It dawned on me to name the book Screamcatcher since it was a play on words and it sounded impactful. Again, I researched that word and only found that it was used in a short story about a kid having a tooth extraction. I knew then that I was home free. I was continuously complimented by all of the publishers and editors who saw the title. It’s the first book in the series, and I have sub-titles for the other two as well, which are sold and just about ready for editing.

Is there a message in your novel that you want readers to grasp?

I’m not very heavy-handed when it comes to delivering messages in my books. I want to avoid any preaching at all costs. I do include the basic/standard survival, loyalty, courage and persistence themes in my young characters, as well as emotional growth and cooperation. I did hide, or rather include, a very deep and subtle message in the story that I think most will gloss over or not recognize altogether. And that is my belief that sometimes the nice guy finishes first and gets the gal. I wanted something that swerved away from the controlling, domineering alpha male that is so often seen in other works of YA and romance. I wanted a slow burn sweet romance that was touching. Quite a few reviewers recognized this message and I got kudos for it. That was a RELIEF.

Are experiences in this book based on someone you know, or events in your own life?

The main character Jorlene (Jory) is named after my sister. Although she does not resemble the FMC physically, she does so in an emotional sense. Her boyfriend, Choice Daniels, is named after my great-nephew. All of my books contain the names of my extended family members. And there are parts of them that show through in the personalities of the fictional characters.

What authors have most influenced your life? What about them do you find inspiring?

Other than those stylists mentioned above, I had direct contact with members of the Science Fiction and Fantasy Writers of America. Alan Dean Foster, Richard Curtis, Robert Bloch, Bob Heinlein, Clive Barker, and others. From their Youtube instruction videos and articles, JK Rowling, Anne Rice, and Stephen King have inspired me tremendously with their no-nonsense attitude about hammering those keys in spite of depression, lack of motivation or pure laziness.

If you had to choose, is there a writer would you consider a mentor? Why?

That honor would go to Poul Anderson who wrote back to me habitually and gave me guidance in the industry when I needed it the most. He took out his valuable time to befriend me and answer so many questions. Can you tell I’m a dinosaur yet?

Who designed the cover of your book? Why did you select this illustrator?

Carlone Andrus of Melange Books, Fire & Ice YA division rendered the cover after reading the book. I had a different idea in mind, but she absolutely nailed it. The compliments have never stopped coming. Most of the plot is revealed on the cover but you would have to search very hard to put it all together.

Do you have any advice for other writers?

Watch your spending on ads–they can be grossly ineffective. Use social media and generously interact with fellow writers and readers. Don’t abuse FB and Twitter solely for the purpose of “Buy My Book.” Join writing groups and learn from the pros. Ask politely for reviews–don’t pressure, harass or intimidate. Be creative. Target your genre readers. Offer incentives and freebies. Craft a newsletter and send it out bi-monthly. Don’t take critiques as personal attacks–learn from honest opinions. Don’t despair. Never give up. Revenge query. I run a writer’s advocate blog and I pull no punches.

Do you have anything specific that you want to say to your readers?

If you think that you’ve had it tough, I recommend you watch Magic Beyond Words, the life story of Joanne Kathleen Rowling. Books just don’t happen. They are nurtured and raised from infancy, just like a budding writer is. This business might quit you, but you cannot quit the business. Stay active and attentively writing.

Chris J. Breedlove Sylvania, Alabama

FACEBOOK TWITTER AMAZON PAGE BLOG

Screamcatcher: Web World

[lostinyourears]

Universal Championship Tournament Primer 2019 Edition

If you are unaware what the Universal Championship Tournament is, it’s an annual tournament since 2009(except 2018 for whatever reason) where all the champions of CMLL fight in 2 blocks of 1 fall single elimination matches. 

8 people in each of the 2 blocks. 

7 matches in each of the 2 blocks which lead to 1 finalist for each block.

Those 2 finals meeting in a 2/3 falls finals.

Block A(pictured below) will be on the 1st.

Block B(remaining 8 men announced/shown in the 2nd picture) on the 8th.

Final 2/3 falls match to Crown the 2019 Universal Champion on the 15th. 

Here is the poster for Block 1 which will include the 8 talents listed on the far left and right. CMLL normally do a seeding battle royal to randomize the seed for the tournament. First 2 thrown out are round 1, then 3rd/4th thrown out, then 5th/6th with the 2 survivors being the final 1st round of that block. 

I’m going to go over each talent and give a brief explanation of their belt/history/chance, going left to right in the picture above. Dragon Lee is last as he isn’t photographed here, but is expected to be in the tournament/is already announced to be in Block A

Everyone will have an (A) or (B) next to their name with the A being 1st, B being on the 8th and the Finals between those two block finalists facing each other on the 15th in a 2/3 falls finals.

Diamante Azul(B)

Current belt :  CMLL World Tag Team Championship(along with Valiente who is pictured closer to the middle), they captured the titles at a Sunday Arena Mexico(November 29th 2018) show from ingobernables Rush & Terrible. Azul/Valiente only have 1 defense which was recent, at the 01/29/2019 Arena Coliseo Guadalajara show, just 3 days before the 1st block of this tournament.

74 days with belt(as of this writing)

Recent accolades/stories : Diamante Azul has been fairly strong recently. In 2017 he headlined and won at Homage to 2 Legends. Unmasking Rush/Dragon Lee/Mistico’s father Bestia del Ring who at the time was going by Pierroth... not the famous Pierroth Jr. from the 1980′s/1990′s who is most associated with that name. The match wasn’t great, but a mask is a mask and headlining H2L is a big deal as that’s their 2nd big event behind CMLL Anniversary. 

Homage to 2 Legends always in March and CMLL Anniversary always in September(Will reference these a lot)

In Fall of 2017 Diamante Azul would also be the man to win Gran Prix for Team Mexico. In 2018′s he was a big roadblock for eventual winner Michael Elgin who Azul in 2017, last pinned to win the match.

Most recently he is in a tag team with Valiente and they have the top tag team belt in the company. The Coliseo Tag Championship which are the B belts, weren’t included in this tournament of champions(Triton/Esfinge).

Likelihood of getting to the finals/winning : Mid, has never won this tournament so he has a decent chance of making it to the finals. Still, out of all the choices for finalists he is one of the least exciting ones for me. 

Valiente is in Block A(February 1st) while Azul is in Block B(February 8th), so we could get a tag team finals, I’d hope not because Azul/Valiente haven’t really earned a who’s the better man? Team finals which we got in 2016′s Universal Finals with Valiente/Volador Jr. 

Soberano Jr.(B)

Current belt :  Mexican National Welterweight Championship, captured on the May 12th, 2017, Super Friday from Rey Cometa. Has successfully defended it 5 times since then vs. Barbaro Cavernario, Sanson, Magia Blanca, And Titan in all 3 main places CMLL operate : Mexico City, Puebla & Guadalajara. One of those defences being in  Korakuen Hall during 2018′s Fantastica Mania.

629 days with belt(as of this writing)

Recent accolades/stories : Winning the  Mexican National Welterweight Championship was part of the strong 2017 push both Soberano Jr. & Sanson had. Both being in the finals of La Copa Jr. & Gran Alternative, both of which Soberano Jr. won helping elevate him into a serious threat. Soberano Jr. doesn’t have any rivals set in stone, but did have an off again/on again rivalry with both Sanson and Barbaro Cavernario.

Likelihood of getting to the finals/winning : High in both regards, because Soberano Jr. is on a upswing momentum wise. He is arguably the best champion at the moment. His title defenses have been a highlight of CMLL since I started this blog. I’d bet money on Soberano Jr., but he isn’t the only strong champion in CMLL as of late. 

Niebla Roja(B) 

Current belt :  CMLL World Light Heavyweight Championship, captured on a non televised Saturday show in the Coliseo Mexico City arena. It was a 10 man elimination match to crown the vacant championship to someone after previous champion La Mascara was fired for vandalising Ultimo Guerreros car. 

600 days with belt(as of this writing)

Recent accolades/stories : Niebla Roja lost his mask to Gran Guerrero in the main event of CMLL 84th Anniversary of 2017. Which happened after he refused to take orders to beat down his brother Angel de Oro, effectively turning tecnico/face in the process and leaving his rudo/heel stable Los Guerreros Laguneros(which Ultimo is the leader of and Gran is a part of)

Since losing his mask, Niebla Roja has won Furia Roja & Rey Bucanero hairs in hair vs. hair matches. His brother(Angel de Oro) lost his mask in Spring of 2018 at Homage to 2 Legends, since then the two have been seen more often teaming together, but before hand hadn’t been strangers either. 

Likelihood of getting to the finals/winning : Low/mid, Niebla Roja seems popular and can be strong. He just isn’t as hyped as many of the young rudos/heels. Still he has never won it, so giving him this accolade wouldn’t put him far above anyone else. Most likely pairing for him would seemingly be Gran Guerrero who is in Block A(1st) to him in Block B(8th)

Volador Jr.(B) 

Current belt : NWA World Historic Welterweight Championship, captured on August 3rd, 2018, Super Friday which was also Negro Casas’ 40th Anniversary Show. Defeating Matt Taven who has won it from Volador Jr. a few months earlier on March 30th, 2018. So really Matt Taven was a stopgap for Volador Jr. holding this belt too long in 1 reign having amassed 1,337 days in his 2nd reign with this title, his first being 199 days(His current/3rd reign will surpass this by tournaments end). So far Volador Jr. has only defended his belt once(this reign) vs. Barbaro Cavernario on October 8th, 2018′s Arena Puebla Show.

181 days with belt(as of this writing)

Recent accolades/stories : Guys like Volador Jr. are why I put a recent caveat on this category. Being in CMLL since 2001, Volador Jr. has done nearly everything a luchador can do in CMLL. Recently he’s won the last Universal Championship Tournament back in 2017, 2017′s Leyenda de Plata, 2017′s Incredible Pairs teaming with rudo/heel Barbaro Cavernario, 2018/2016′s Torneo Gran Alternativa, 2016′s(the year it was revived) Gran Prix, 2015/2016′s Homage to 2 Legends Main Events and with Mistico/Valiente had the longest CMLL Trios Title Reign in that belt’s history 1,234 days.

These are just his most recent accolades and gives you a scope of how big he has been in CMLL recently. Of course before all this he lost his mask to La Sombra in the feud of 2013 which culminated in the CMLL 80th Anniversary Main Event. While more recently in 2017 his feud with Caristico was one of the biggest stories of that year. 

Volador Jr.’s most recent story is about losing his belt to Taven, winning it back and oddly enough teaming with Taven at CMLL 85th Anniversary. Where both lost their hair vs. hair tag team match to Rush/Barbaro.The most humiliating defeat for Volador Jr... since losing his belt to Taven for the summer.

Likelihood of getting to the finals/winning : Good/Very good, while it’s true Volador Jr. has won this tournament once and him winning would boost him to 2 to be the only other man on Ultimo Guerrero’s level. Volador Jr. is basically the ace of CMLL. So him doing that can’t be ruled out. Most obvious final for Volador would be Caristico, since Volador/Ultimo are in Block B and can’t both go to the finals. Barbaro Cavernario who shave Volador Jr. a few months back would be a good Final for Volador Jr. as well.

Caristico(A)

Current belt :  NWA World Historic Middleweight Championship, captured on August 21st, 2018 on a Guadalajara Show. Defeating career rival Ultimo Guerrero ending his 1,086 day reign.

163 days with belt(as of this writing)

Recent accolades : As mentioned just above one of 2017′s big rivalries for CMLL was Caristico vs. Volador Jr. : The two met in Leyenda de Plata’s finals, Caristico challenged for Volador Jr.’s NWA WH Welterweight belt and One match even being the last main event of 2017 for CMLL.

Caristico’s only real accolade since coming back other than his current belt is winning 2017′s Gran Alternative with Soberano Jr. those two last meeting Ultimo Guerrero/Sanson in the finals.

/stories :

A story going on with Caristico since his return to CMLL in 2015 is... having no friends or allies. Caristico of course was one of the hottest guys in lucha and really more broadly wrestling history with his 1st run in CMLL(2004-2011) before he’d go on to be Sin Cara in WWE for a few years then as Myzteziz in AAA before coming back to CMLL, after those two pretty poor runs. 

Well Volador Jr. hates him because he left, Mistico(II) hates him because he sorta lives in Caristico’s shadow, with Mistico(II)’s hate comes the hate of his brother Dragon Lee. So that’s like 3 of the big tecnico roster members who he could normally count on as allies, that don’t like him at all. 

This came to a head on April 2nd, 2018 when despite being tecnico he teamed with Gran/Ultimo Guerrero to challenge for the CMLL Trios Champions Mistico/Volador Jr./Valiente were holding.

So Caristico is a good guy/tecnico/face atm, but him having no allies might eventually see him seek asylum or at some point start a tecnico faction so someone will have his back. 2017/2018 seemed like years CMLL was finally letting Caristico get out of his leaving for WWE doghouse. This win would be proof positive that Caristico is finally in CMLL’s good graces again.

Likelihood of getting to the finals/winning : Very Good, Caristico has never won this event as it debut in 2009(he left in 2011). So he wasn’t around for half of them. This seems like an accolade Caristico will accomplish in his career, but at 36 and not showing much signs of age... it’s not like it’s now or never. Most likely final for him seems to be Volador Jr.

Stuka Jr.(A) 

Current belt : NWA World Historic Light Heavyweight Championship, captured August 14th, 2018. He defeated Hechicero ending his 650 day reign. This is the 1st singles title in CMLL for Stuka Jr., who has more often been part of trios/tag championship teams.

170 days with belt(as of this writing)

Recent accolades/stories : Stuka Jr. is the oldest man covered so far here(not by much) at 39. Despite that he is less decorated. A company workhorse so to speak, his biggest accolade is being the longest reigning Coliseo Tag Title Champion along side Fuego holding it 1,708 days, but this is a B Tag Title behind CMLL World Tag Champions. 

Still losing those belts to Okumura/Namajague(aka NJPW’s Desperado) in 2013 lead Stuka Jr. to his highest profile victory when he and partner Rey Cometa won a lucha de apuestas over Okumura/Namajague in the main event of 2013′s Homage to 2 Legends. Making Okumura shave and Namajague unmask.

Stuka Jr. won his current title from Hechicero who has even come back to challenge for it again to a losing effort. Don’t see that playing a role here, because Hechicero isn’t in this tournament and CMLL don’t really do run ins.

Likelihood of getting to the finals/winning : Low, Stuka Jr. is a great talent and champion, but not likely to win this or go to the finals. He just isn’t a star that CMLL push too hard. He could win as a workhorse accolade. Finally winning the big one, but this doesn’t feel like his year, given he has little buzz or momentum coming into this. I think he could have a good match given anyone in the finals.  

Valiente(A)

Current belt :  CMLL World Tag Team Championship(along with Diamante Azul who is on the far left), they captured the titles at a Sunday Arena Mexico(November 29th 2018) show from ingobernables Rush & Terrible. Azul/Valiente only have 1 defense vs Rush/Bestia del Ring which was recent, at the 01/29/2019 Arena Coliseo Guadalajara show, just 3 days before the 1st block of this tournament.

74 days with belt(as of this writing)

Recent accolades/stories : Just like Stuka Jr. a large chunk of Valiente’s career is on gold holding teams. Valiente is now the oldest person covered here at 44. 

As mentioned in Volador’s section above Valentine/Volador/Mistico have the longest CMLL World Trios Reign. Before Volador though Mistico and Valiente had a another long reign with Mascara Dorada. Making Mistico/Valiente tied at 4th for most days with the CMLL trios title. They both only have 2 reigns though with the 3 names above them having 3/4/5 reigns. 

Valiente has only held 1 singles title, Mexican National Welterweight Championship he had a nearly 700 day reign with that belt. The longest since he has held the title in 2009-2011, but Soberano Jr. is quickly catching up to him. 

Biggest accolade of recent memory is winning 2016′s Universal Tournament. Finals which were held on a Day of the Dead show. Trios Champion Valiente vs. Trios + Welterweight Champion Volador Jr. 2/3 of the Trios Champions and obvious favorite Volador Jr. lost to Valiente. 

Volador Jr./Valiente won a tournament whose finals were at Homage to 2 Legends(March 16th, 2018) beating Terrible/Rey Bucanero to win the CMLL Tag Team Championships only to have Terrible come back with Rush to dethrone them, then of course Valiente/Azul got them back. 

Likelihood of getting to the finals/winning : Low, Valiente won recently and like Stuka Jr. is more of a utility player than the top champion of CMLL. If he were going to the finals Azul/Volador Jr. seem the most obvious, but they did Volador/Valiente in 2016, so would arguably be one of the weakest finals they could book even if the story makes sense on paper.

Mephisto(B)

Current belt : CMLL World Welterweight Championship, captured the title May 4th, 2016 from Mascara Dorada(aka WWE’s Gran Metalik), who had held the title for 103 days.

1,003 days with belt(as of this writing)

Recent accolades/stories : In 2016 Mephisto won with Incredible Pairs with Mistico over Caristico/Cibernetico in the finals. Which gave us these cool ass Mistico/Mephisto masks.

Past that tournament win, Mephisto has carried various singles belts, tag belts, and trios titles. Mephisto is leader of Los Hijos del Infierno with Luciferno/Ephesto. They lost the Mexican National Trios Championship on July 25, 2017 in Guadalajara to NGD(Sanson, Cuatrero & Forastero), who are all in the tournament thanks to that title. 

Likelihood of getting to the finals/winning : Mid, Mephisto has never won. That’s good for him because it wouldn’t catapult him above many. Instead it would just solify him as someone in the 1 time winners level. With Hijos del Infierno being one of the weaker looking rudo factions right now, a Mephisto boost would help solidify them as a force and Mephisto eventually dropping his belt an even bigger deal than it already is. Best finals for Mephisto? Caristico, I suppose though as a faction leader Mephisto would be a good boss level threat for anyone in Block A.

Barbaro Cavernario(A)

Current belt :  Mexican National Light Heavyweight Championship, captured the title on November 6th, 2018 from Atlantis ending his 1,170 day reign. Atlantis is a legend and this may be his last singles title. Barbaro winning it is a big changing of the guard, even if it happened at a none Arena Mexico show with less people catching it.

86 days with belt(as of this writing)

Recent accolades/stories : This is his 2nd title reign, his first and only other title held was the Mexican National Welterweight Championship for 404 days. He dropped that title to Rey Cometa who Barbaro Cavernario shaved in both 2014(Anniversary)/2016(Gran Prix). Speaking of shavings he also recently won the CMLL 85th Anniversary Main Event with Rush shaving both Volador Jr./Matt Taven, the biggest win of Barbaro’s career.

Barbaro Cavernario has had more luck in tournaments than most, winning In En Busca de un Ídolo(Search of an Idol) in 2014,  Reyes del Aire in 2016,  Leyenda de Plata in 2018, Gran Alternativa in 2014(with Mr. Niebla) and Incredible Pairs in 2017(with Volador Jr.).

I consider Leyenda de Plata/Gran Alternative/Increible Pairs and the Universal Championship Tournament to be CMLL’s Big 4 Tournaments. So if Barbaro Cavernario could pull it off, it would put him in CMLL’s elite class. 

Likelihood of getting to the finals/winning : High, Barbaro Cavernario is coming into this tournament with a heap of momentum. He has also never won it and being a 1 time winner of Plata isn’t going to make him too big. Still, Plata/85th Anniversary wins were about 2 months apart and only about 3-4 months removed. So there is good reason to think Barbaro doesn’t need this win to stay hot. Him being a finalist would be a great pairing for any and all Block B finalists to take on and beat as a final boss.

Ultimo Guerrero(B)

Current belt : CMLL World Heavyweight Champions, captured on October 16, 2018. Diamante Azul/Ultimo Guerrero survived an 8 man elimination torneo to be the finalists the week prior. In the 2/3 falls finals Ultimo beat Azul to be crowned new champion after Marco Corleone vacated the belt to leave wrestling for now.  

107 days with belt(as of this writing)

& CMLL World Trios Champions(with Gran Guerrero & Euforia), captured on September 28, 2018 from The Cl4n (Ciber the Main Man, The Chris and Sharlie Rockstar), who held the belts for a weak 14 days winning it from Los Guerreros Laguneros at CMLL 85th Anniversary.

125 days with belt(as of this writing)

Recent accolades/stories : Ultimo, like Volador Jr. above has done pretty much everything. Before this Heavyweight Title he was the Light Heavyweight champion. As leader of Los Guerrero Laguneros, Ultimo Guerrero has been in many many storylines fighting various tecnicos. 

Leyenda de Azul in 2016, Gran Alternativa in 1999/2008/2011,Gran Prix in 2006/2007, and has held the CMLL Tag Titles 6 times and CMLL Trios Titles 5 times tied for most reigns with Negro Casas(tag) and Hector Garza(trios). 

It’s likely his number of reigns will pass them, as Negro Casas is near retirement and over 20 years older and Hector Garza has passed away.

Templario has been added to Los Guerreros Laguneros and there has been some rumors of Euforia perhaps leaving the ranks of that group. While Euphoria has a trios title, he isn’t included in this tournament. Unlike Gran/Ultimo who are related, not sure if that would/could play into this tournament at all.

Likelihood of getting to the finals/winning : Mid, but never count out Ultimo Guerrero. Just like Volador Jr., if included Ultimo can win. He is the big bad and shows no signs of slowing down.  

Gran Guerrero(A)

Current belt : CMLL World Trios Champions(with Ultimo Guerrero & Euforia), captured on September 28, 2018 from The Cl4n (Ciber the Main Man, The Chris and Sharlie Rockstar) who held the belts for a weak 14 days winning it from Los Guerreros Laguneros at CMLL 85th Anniversary.

125 days with belt(as of this writing)

Recent accolades/stories : Gran along with all of Los Guerrero Laguneros feuded over the last summer/fall with The Cl4n. It was a series of Okay matches carried by Los Guerrero Laguneros. Before that in fall of 2017 he unmasked Niebla Roja in the main event of CMLL 84th Anniversary. Which is still his biggest win to date. Unmasking Niebla Roja, the defector from Los Guerreros Laguneros who was still using an Ultimo Guerrero inspired mask design.

Pictured below : Ultimo/Niebla Roja facing off on the CMLL interview stage after signing their mask vs. mask match contract.

Likelihood of getting to the finals/winning : Dark Horse, having spent most of 2018 as a team player in Los Guerreros Laguneros this win would establish Gran Guerrero as a threat again. Either to unmask someone, win a singles title or just be more of a big deal in general. Niebla Roja and his older brother(maybe real life father) Ultimo Guerrero are both in Block B and potential finalists that would be a good storyline fit for Gran Guerrero. Families normally don’t fight in CMLL, so Gran/Ultimo Guerrero would be very very unlikely.  

El Terrible(A)

Current belt : Mexican National Heavyweight Championship, captured on October 29, 2017, in a tournament to crown the vacant championship by last defeating Diamante Azul, just like Ultimo with the CMLL Heavyweight a year or so later. This belt was vacant from 2013, until this time, retired for a short time when it’s holding champion Hector Garza passed away.

459 days with belt(as of this writing)

Recent accolades/stories : Terrible quietly has one of the best resumes in CMLL. Leyenda de Azul in 2008, Gran Alternativa in 2012(with Euforia), Increible pairs in 2015/2018 the latter of which lead to him joining ingobernables with Rush and his father Bestia del Ring. 

This is his 2nd Heavyweight Title in CMLL, the 1st he won by last beating Rush in a 2012 tournament to crown the vacant champion. That would spark the feud that lead to 2012′s CMLL 79th Anniversary Main Event where Rush would beat Terrible to shave him. One of both men’s biggest moments. 

It was Terrible’s 1st Lucha de Apuestas loss, a record which has further been blemished by a loss in Homage to 2 Legends 2015 Main Event with Rey Bucanero vs. Volador Jr./Maximo Sexy making his total record 6-2.

Likelihood of getting to the finals/winning : Dark Horse again, he isn’t as likely as Gran because he has already won this once in 2012. To win again would push him above everyone, but Ultimo Guerrero. Still that’s a story you could work with if you paired him with Volador Jr. who has also won once. Volador Jr. shaved him, but Terribles tag mate/leader Rush shaved Volador Jr. recently. Volador was also cheated out of Incredible Pairs 2018 by Rush/Terrible. So that pairing has the most history(for Terrible) and would see both men looking to win their 2nd Universal Tournament.

Forastero(A)

Current belt :  Mexican National Trios Championship(with Sanson & Cuatrero), captured on July 25, 2017 from Los Hijos del Infierno in Guadalajara, Jalisco

555 days with belt(as of this writing)

Recent accolades/stories : Forastero is basically the 3rd man of his faction NGD, being cousin to the brothers Sanson/Cuatrero who are both sons of legend Cien Caras. 2019 could be Forastero’s breakout year, but thus far he is unproven in singles like his cousins. 

Likelihood of getting to the finals/winning : Very Low, Forastero just isn’t proven as a singles guy. Even getting to the finals seems unlikely and I don’t even know who’d be a good pair for him. I suppose his cousins? Though CMLL is known for not making family fight that often. 

Cuatrero(B)

Current belt : Mexican National Trios Championship(with Sanson & Cuatrero), captured on July 25, 2017 from Los Hijos del Infierno in Guadalajara, Jalisco  

555 days with belt(as of this writing)

&  CMLL World Middleweight Championship, captured January 19, 2018 from Angel de Oro ending his 300 day reign in Japan at Fantastica Mania.

377 days with belt(as of this writing)

Recent accolades/stories : 2018 for Cuatrero was all about beating down Angel de Oro and proving himself as a singles competitor like his Brother Sanson had the year prior in 2017. He defended again vs. Angel de Oro twice and Titan at a Day of the Dead show, some of the best matches in CMLL for 2018. Cuatrero did so good in 2018 that Sanson went from obvious leader of NGD to basically on par with his brother. Lots of people who didn’t see Sanson in 2017 even thinking of Cuatrero as the leader. 

Likelihood of getting to the finals/winning : Very High, Cuatrero had a magnificent 2018. Better than everyone else in the tournament except Barbaro Cavernario who is also a bit more established. Cuatrero vs. Caristico/Dragon Lee/Barbaro Cavernario from Block A would all be very exciting pairings.

Sanson(B)

Current belt : Mexican National Trios Championship(with Sanson & Cuatrero), captured on July 25, 2017 from Los Hijos del Infierno in Guadalajara, Jalisco  

555 days with belt(as of this writing)

Rey del Inframundo(King of the Underworld) Championship, captured November 3, 2017 in an 4 on 4 elimination match to crown the inaugural Rey del Inframundo Champion. This is a trophy belt and probably not why Sanson is in this tournament. He successfully defended this belt vs. Templario at the November 2, 2018 Day of the Dead show. It’ll likely get defended annually like this on yearly Day of the Dead shows.

454 days with belt(as of this writing)

Recent accolades/stories : As mentioned above Soberano Jr. & Sanson had a big push which saw both being in the finals of La Copa Jr. & Gran Alternative, both of which Soberano Jr. won helping elevate him into a serious threat. Sanson got his win back by getting the King of the Underworld Title in a match that Soberano Jr. also took part in. 

Likelihood of getting to the finals/winning : Likely, He and Cuatrero are pretty even I’d be surprised if one of them didn’t make it to their block final on the 8th. Unlike Forastero who on the 1st of February may not make it past the 1st round depending on who he’s unluckily enough to face off against in his stacked block, though both blocks are tough, individually both Sanson/Cuatrero are tougher than Forastero.

Best pairings for Sanson are the same as Cuatrero. Niebla Roja would be good for both as well. Sanson has had title matches for Roja’s single titles and Angel de Oro is Niebla Roja’s brother who Cuatrero destroyed various times in 2018. 

Dragon Lee(A)

Current belt :  CMLL World Lightweight Championship, captured on March 4th, 2016 in Arena Mexico from Kamaitachi(Hiromu Takahashi) ending his 40 day transitional reign which started at 2016′s Fantastica Mania. 

1,063 days with belt(as of this writing)

Recent accolades/stories : Dragon Lee won 2018′s King of the Indies Tournament, 2019′s Fantastica Mania family tournament, and has 2 masks under his name taking Kamaitachi’s mask at Homage to 2 Legends in 2015 and La Mascara’s mask at CMLL 83rd Anniversary in 2016. La Mascara is no longer in the company, but was a part of Rush’s Ingobernables stable at the time of his mask loss to Dragon Lee. 

Dragon Lee was away a good chunk of 2018 to do a reality TV Show in Mexico and BOSJ over in NJPW. His most recent story is Pentagon/Fenix beating him up post match... seemingly setting a feud up. Dragon Lee and his brothers Rush/Mistico will likely fight Pentagon/Fenix down the line. 

Likelihood of getting to the finals/winning : Likely, I could certainly see Dragon Lee going to the finals even if it’s to lose to Sanson/Cuatrero. Dragon Lee/Rush will seemingly be working more dates in RoH come 2019. With that being the case I could see CMLL holding this win from him. Still seeing Dragon Lee in the finals just seems right. If he can get past Caristico/Barbaro who are the other two high chance people in Block A upcoming on February 1st.

TL;DR I know this is long, but there are 16 people to cover with various histories. I’d suggest reading the people marked with A’s before the A Block coming up on the 1st and holding B’s for next week when we are rolling up on Block B. 

[dat-g-man]

Voltron au with drag queens and Shance! Inspired by Rupaul’s Drag Race Part 1

Lance is a drag queen who got his start by emulating his favorite Latina ladies (like Selena and Celia Cruz) but then got out of his zone and became known for his predominantly blue themed drag and how he incorporates organic (like flowers and nature) and inorganic elements (like mecha) to the point that he won so many competitions they send him judging requests  instead of competing invitations. Enter Keith, a newly awakened queen that will take this new competition by storm. They meet early in their drag career changes. For Keith he was just getting comfortable with his drag to compete and for lance it was his first competition to judge as a surprise guest judge. As a finalist, they answered a few questions for the announcer to share as they went down the catwalk. For Keith he answered what got him into drag and he said Lady Blue (lances drag persona name for now. Idk how happy i am with it) when he saw her as Selena and she took his breath away

Selena is one of his favorite Divas being from Texas and all, but it was so beautiful and liberating to see. Until he changed career, nothing else brought him that feeling so being able to compete is validating that change that his family questioned. He is here and he is living his best life. Lance is in an incognito drag but his drag combined with answer make Keith stand out to him. Keith is starting out, but it is known he has a penchant for red and has a lot of black and purple themed drags as well. Idk his drag name, but his drag has it's own niche in that it always combines weapons and technology as his best friend is a tech genius. When they have the finalists all line up and announce the guest judge who dramatically rises from the vip part of the audience he is shook but composed. Lance is his charming self and makes a nice comment about all of them before dismissing them while the judges deliberate. The queens go back to their dressing stations in the back and gently tease Keith

Because his favorite queen is a judge while some snappy ones are like i bet that's why you said all that, you probably knew she was judging and decided to kiss her ass. This makes things tense in the back but Keith is not gonna let them say that shit and as he is getting up to answer somebody beats him to the punch. Idk who is who yet, but this queen tells the salty bitch to calm her fake tits because she is how many years in drag but has yet to create her own following let alone win in competitions. Everybody knows the only reason you got here was the big ass you kissed got you in as an applicant. Fix yourself first so somebody can look up to you like Keith does to Blue

There is silence but then they are like wait you just started doing drag last year? And keith is like yeah and they are all impressed and most take back their jealous words and start actually talking but then they judges are done deliberating and everyone is back on the stage. Keith ends up winning second and the person who defended him before he could make things ugly got first. Third is not important (for now since idk how important they might be later on) but they all get to talk with the judges and Keith is shook again because Blue is skipping towards him and they two talk about the technology as both have best friends that help, Pidge on Keith's side and Hunk for lance, and lance straight up tells him he did not know he was such an inspiration for someone who he sees will go far in drag. He is unable to be his drag mom because of so many new commitments,but he would love to be a drag aunt and keep in touch. He just recommends Keith create a social media account because lance began

Following the hashtag her fans gave her which is something like knifequeencansteponmeandstabmesheishellaslayinallthetime.

Keith is like wait wut and blushes again. From there lance helps from afar as he continues doing drag, judging everywhere because his advocacy for lgbtq rights

Got him a lot of momentum, and creating content for those marginalized groups like a weekly youtube