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shititbe · 3 years ago

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Anyway, HSM2 is about internalized homophobia, and no one can tell me otherwise.

High School Musical is one of the most beloved franchises in the world. Teenagers all over the world grew up watching Troy and Gabriella harmonize together. Three movies, and nearly a decade later it’s still beloved by all. The first film easily forgotten in the ashes of the early 2000’s, the third film stuck in a purgatorial limbo of the rather unfortunate late 2000’s. The second film on the other hand sticks out between the ruckus.

The second High School Musical film takes place at Sharpay and Ryan’s family country club, during the summer between junior and senior year. The Wildcats are working summer jobs on the country club, often forced to the beck and call of Ryan and Sharpay themselves. Sharpay uses all her prestige to help Troy with college instead of starting at the bottom ( or rather, in the kitchen washing dishes) with his friends. In the time she’s helping Troy, she is also pushing her brother away; replacing him with Troy in their musical number for the talent show, and refusing to hang out with him in preference for Troy. Ryan becomes vengeful to his twin and starts hanging around the Wildcats in the kitchen. At first, he was met with some distasteful looks and words (most of which from Chad). With the help of Kelsey, and her neutral party, Ryan fits in smoothly with the other teenagers, eventually giving the WildCats all dance lessons.

Throughout the movie, the main conflict continues to be the internal conflict of Troy Bolton. He debates over and over again if he should go through with Sharpay’s shenanigans, or if he wants to “listen to my own heart.” This of course involves Gabriella, as she is Troy’s love interest. She’s not in the second film except for the beginning, then, where she leaves in the middle of the film - in order to create angst for Troy - then when she shows up again in the finally to sing/rejoin Troy.

The conflict in the second film is the combining of Troy’s two worlds. His first - his main world in the first movie, that hence became his secondary world - which is represented by Chad. Then his secondary world - which becomes his main world in this movie - which is represented by Ryan. Chad represents Troy’s masculinity, or his more idealized version of himself. Ryan represents Troy’s femininity or his current version of reality. These two worlds collide in the iconic song “I don’t dance”.

Since this movie - and hence this scene - came out in the early 2000’s, a lot of the innuendoes went over people's heads. Luckily, as the children who watched this movie grew older and more experienced, and the world became more accepting, we’re able to see this song for what it is.

Before getting into the lore and symbolism of the iconic “I Don’t Dance” sequence, context is needed. For most of human history, homosexuality was seen as a sin in all places except ancient times (see: Greece and Japan). The modern age is the most accepting on all fronts, such as sexual orientation, race, and religion. In the early 2000’s, High School Musical director Kenny Ortega was not publicialy out yet. He wouldn’t be till 2014.

Originally, while writing this, my first thought was that Kenny - the director - would be using Troy as a y/n type character to project his insecurities and struggles with masculinity, and what that means in defining his orientation and societal views that would be placed upon him. Then, it came to me later that this is in fact not the case, Troy (and Gabriella - who is in fact a y/n character for the female audience) is more of a character for a man of his time, confused with his own ideals of masculinity and the views of society because, “oh god, I can’t like theater/drama because only queer people and girls like it!” The second point is pushed further with the Troy and Sharpay sub-plot. Sharpay tries to further Troy’s career as a basketball player, though that’s not what he wants anymore, and Troy is no longer sure if that is what he ever wanted to begin with (enter the song “Bet on it” and the hilarious meme “no dad, I’m giving up on your dream”).

Keeping these things in mind - Kenney’s queerness, and Troy’s struggle to realize you can in fact sing and be a heterosexual, wow, revolutionary - it became clear to me that Kenney’s y/n characters were Ryan and Chad.

For those who aren’t into the arts, or find them too difficult after a singular attempt thinking they could write a world class novel on the first go, let me be the first to tell you every author has a y/n character. First, for those who don’t know what y/n stands for, it’s a popular fanfiction trope where a writer will write a story about a character dating, being friends, and so on, with the reader. The y/n stands for “your name” so anyone can be the main character in this story at any time. For a writer of mainstream fictional work, such as High School Musical, Game Of Thrones, Lord Of The Rings, Pride and Prejudice, Harry Potter, Hunger Games, even most comics. Now, most writers or directors aren’t going to be as obvious as having a character not named (or named y/n) or even named Jane (looking at you Jane Austin), the y/n character of many mainstream authors/directors/comic artists and so on is usually the character they feel or have given the most attributes similar to themselves.

It’s the same reason people have favourite characters. You see a fictional character and you either 1. Want to Bob the Builder them, 2. Some sort of weird sex thing, or 3. See more/the most of yourself in this character. Number three - thankfully - is usually the main reason. Some people just create their own favourite characters. An even easier way to think about this, is just projection baby, that’s psych 101.

Before I went off on a small tangent of fictional works and how human emotion plays into creating them (except anything Disney has made in the past decade, and no you can’t change my mind on that) I mentioned that Chad and Ryan are Kenney’s y/n characters. As a queer person myself, it’s clear for me to see the different struggles each of these characters face and how these reflect the queer experience.

So, let’s finally get into it.

Ryan, without it being explicitly said is clearly a character of what people in the early 2000s think a gay man is. He is effeminate, wearing bright coloured outfits with lots of accessories - namely his signature hats - he is also in the theater department doing musicals, and passive/subservient to any of his twin sisters' wills. Yes, now we know gay men aren’t just feminized men, but in the early 2000’s a gay man who can do "masculine" things like change their car oil, like sports, and so on, break the "effeminate" stereotype thus confused many cishet people. Sharpay is painted as more confident - or, for sake of comparability - masculine to her twin in the first movie, and most of the second movie. Making Ryan a bit of her dog who would do anything to get by - painting Ryan as lesser than human, once more, playing into the homophobia of the early 2000's.

Despite the clear stereotypes playing into his character, Ryan is consistently one of the most confident characters in the movie. The other, being his sister of course. This confidence in himself is what gravitates the other characters towards him, either by being intimidated (Troy, thinking Ryan and Gabriella were a thing), or admiration (Chad, by the end of “I don’t dance”).

Chad, on the other hand, is a whole different ball game. While he is confident in the first movie, and the first portion of the second movie, he begins to break more and more when Ryan becomes a more integral part of the Wildcat group. To keep in mind, Chad is also the most vocal about his distaste for Troy’s artistic past-time. When the other Wildcats join Ryan and begin learning how to dance for the talent show at the end of the movie, Chad is also the most vocal about his distaste. The baseball game where “I don’t dance” takes place, is the climax of Chad’s arc and his turn towards acceptance to Ryan/Troy’s hobbies.

Of course, there is more to the “I don’t dance” sequence than just Chad’s realization - the exact one Troy comes to terms with in the second movie as well - of “oh my god I don’t have to be gay to enjoy stereotypical ‘feminine’ things.” That is the main part of the song though, that and all the sexual tension.

Going back to what I’ve stated previously, Chad and Ryan are Kenney’s projection or y/n characters. Let me do a small recap before we get into the nitty gritty of the famous “I don’t dance” video.

Thinking back to the first few paragraphs, I stated that Kenney wasn’t publicly out till 2014, about 7 years after the second movie came out. This could be due to the fact that a) it’s the early 2000’s and everyones still very homophobic, or b) self-doubt that comes with the queer experience. The most likely reason is a mixture of both of these. Because of this, Ryan is the more self-assured version, or idealized version of Kenney that he wants to be. Ryan is confident, never being swayed about his lifestyle (could be read as: sexuality) even though Chad - and most of the wildcats in the first movie - put him through relentless “teasing” and humiliation. He’s confident, almost to a fault, he’s sure of himself, and yet still reaches out a hand to Chad and the other wildcats to show them that they’re just being, kinda dick-ish.

Every queer person wants to be Ryan. Despite his heavily stereotyped characterization, I personally believe he is one of the stronger written characters in the movies, mainly due to Kenney putting the time in to really make Ryan feel like a real person, to give himself some sort of relief of his own anxieties, a chance to see the world through a person who truly has no fear. Unlike Kenney himself.

This is where Chad comes in.

Chad is seen as “confident” in the first movie, the second Troy “leaves” basketball though, all that confidence comes crashing down. His best friend has another hobby - one he thinks is “not right” (it’s okay, you can say gay), - they wont be spending all their time together (first, can you say dependent relationship much, yikes).Chad’s defining characteristic up until their fight that instigate act three of the second movie, is being Troy’s best friend. I’m going to take this as if this were truly the case, and not a decently written character arch. Some people base themselves around their friends and their whole identity on being a friend, that they lose sight of themselves, this mainly in high school of course, when your whole world is really nothing but school, and friends. Newly developed independence is there, but that’s scary, so instead of worrying about the future, cling to something that’s reliable. I’ve seen this happen, mainly at the end of high school, when the “real world” is coming a bit too close for comfort. This could generally be the case if a person is lonely, but for timeline sake I’m going to say Chad has got some anxiety about graduating (considering the second movie takes place the summer of junior year).

His lashing out at Troy’s hobbies and at Troy’s neglectful friendship, make more sense with that background, and are seen more in the second movie where Troy begins spending all his spare time with Sharpay (trying to collect that BAG!). Chad - and others (read: father) - insists that music is not a feasible career option, and Troy should just stick with basketball (like...that is a feasible career option). The tension Chad creates in the studio only grows when the other wildcats decide to take up Ryan’s offer for dance lessons and move from the kitchen, to helping out with the talent show. (Next essay idea: how high school musical two was really about class all along, cause Jesus).

Chad is the less obvious option for a y/n character. Though again, the 2000’s were not as cool people like to pretend they are. Chad - for Kenney - represents what he actually feels, this fear of being rejected for how he is and how he chooses to live his life/lifestyle, so he sticks to something reliable. Ryan is new, and exciting, and confident in a way that Kenney/Chad wish they could be, but in order for that to happen they need to understand that maybe people are complex creatures, and can enjoy multiple hobbies (aka: the same lesson Troy is teaching the viewers, but far less boring). But, for Kenney/Chad facing that thought and that realization is scary, and thus, they lash out at anyone (read this paragraph as: Chad mad jealous of Ryan cause Ryan bomb as fuck).

All this build up, finally comes ahead in the employee baseball match

******

The baseball game is probably the most memorable scene in the whole High School Musical franchise (minus Sharpay’s “Fabulous” solo, but that’s also from the same movie, and it’s kinda rude to give what’s already the best more points); the tension in the scene, and what it implies makes it the best written segment of all three movies, let alone the most entertaining.

Some things to keep in mind from our background information: Chad is missing his bestie and struggling with what being “masculine” really means for him and others. Ryan of course makes this confusing, because the traditional method is being thrown out the window. In short, Chad has internalized homophobia, and Ryan being open - or as open as Disney would let him - is causing all sorts of problems.

Despite the song, “I don’t dance” being logged into our collective skulls for all eternity (you’re probably humming it right now, sorry about that), the very brief interaction of Ryan and Chad before the game is lost on the public consciousness. The two are clearly comfortable with each other, though the distaste seems to be on Chad’s side more than Ryans. So, the two start playfully jabbing at each other before deciding to do a bat toss to see who will be in the outfield first.

Before they begin the bat toss, Ryan says “You don’t think dancing takes some game?” Chad then very clearly checks him out, doing a simple but effective ‘drag-your-eyes-over-them-top-to-bottom-then-smile’ and says “you got game?” (Seen in gif below)

I don’t know how much you know about sex metaphors and how many of those baseball has in it (seriously though, it’s a lot), but with the bat toss, Ryan’s hand ended up on top, and Chad’s under Ryan’s. Let’s ignore this for now, it’ll be implied again later. Ryan’s team starts out in the outfield because he won the bat toss, and hence, the song officially starts.

The first lyrics (ignoring the chores of “hey batter batter, hey batter batter, swing”) is

I'll show you that it's one and the same

Baseball, dancing, same game

It's easy

Step up to the place, start swingin

This part is sung by Ryan, who is taunting Chad out in the outfield. Before the game, as stated, Chad was taunting Ryan about his lack of “game” (both sexual and not sexual metaphor are implied), and now, Ryan has turned those tables around. Baseball - is seen as more masculine than dancing, not as masculine as football or basketball, but it’s up there. Chad is someone who cares about his masculinity, enough to the point that Ryan playing baseball makes him loose his mind. Makes him question his own personal definition of masculinity, if you will.

Ryan says, “baseball, dancing, same game,” impyling that, to him, baseball and dancing are one and the same. That is baffling to Chad, cause well, how can something meant for girls even be close to something meant for boys.

Chad comes back with:

I wanna play ball now, and that's all

This is what I do

It ain't no dance that you can show me, yeah

This only proves my previous point.

I had a conversation with myself about this, and I’ve decided not to include it in this essay, but a second essay may or may not be possible. Basically the premise - the dancing/”musical” moments of High School Musical are conjured up images by those meant to see them (ie: like a visual hallucination, but, not really) but this scene kinda poo-poos that idea.

Now, the thing I am talking about is Ryan and Chad’s peacocking at each other during the time they sing these lyrics. The movements they’re making could be mistaken for dancing - as we automatically assume it is because of the title and themes of the movie - or it could be them just getting ready for the baseball game. Ryan swings his leg over the pitcher's mound, tossing the ball up and down into his glove, making wavy hand gestures, etc. Chad brushes off his gloves, swings his legs, hits the bat on each foot, and so on.

For the peacocking, Chad makes a mock of the ballerina foot stance before strutting over to the home plate. Ryan laughs at this, which earns quite the smirk from Chad himself (see gif below).

This is when it becomes a conversation.

You'll never know - R

Oh I know - Ch

If you never try - R

There's just one little thing - Ch

That stops me every time, yeah - Ch

Come on - Ch

When Chad says “Come on” it’s when Ryan throws the baseball at him, starting the game, and giving Chad’s team their first strike of the game (get it, it’s funny). Now, obviously we need to talk about the “there’s just one little thing that stops me every time.” As a queer person, I assure you, two of the things that kept me from living my Best Life were 1) my own ignorance of what asexuality was and 2) the fear that everyone I love would hate me for who I am, and what I have no control over.

Sorry to get deep like that on main, but, can any other queer person say different? Obviously, your first point may differ, but my point still stands. In the video/scene there is a very short moment (to which I have condensed into a gif for you all, you’re welcome, and I’m sorry about the quality in advance), of the camera moving over to Chad’s team (or his friends in this case since it’s an employee baseball game) as he says this line (gif below).

I will not be explaining the use of subtly in this essay, but I’m sure you get the metaphor Kenney is trying to use. If not, let me spell it out for you in very simple words. This song has a lot of sexual innuendos (as mentioned pervious with the baseball bat scene and still, more to come), with that in mind, and clearly queer themes at play (as mentioned before, again), this scene only shows Chad isn’t as straight as he leads on. His fear/phobia of Ryan/the arts come from a much deeper place.

In shorter, and much simpler terms: Chad queer.

But, let’s get back to the boy's conversation.

I don't dance - Ch

I know you can - R

Not a chance, no - Ch

If I could do this, well, you could do that - R

Translation: “If I can do this weird, sweaty, dirty, Male thing without blowing a fuse, you can and should be able to dance just fine.”

But I don't dance - Ch

Hit it out of the park - Both

I don't dance - Ch

I say you can - R

There's not a chance, oh - Ch

Slide home, you score, swingin on the dance floor - Both

I don't dance, no - Ch (This is just the chores, you’ll see it multiple times throughout the essay, I just figured if the song is going to be in your head, go all the way right).

Two-steppin, now you're up to bat - R

Bases loaded, do your dance - R

Here we are with the baseball metaphors you’ve all been waiting for ladies and gentlemen. Girls, gays, and non-binary pals. For those who have somehow managed a sheltered existence with access to the internet, lemme help you. Ryan is talking about “loaded bases” both in the context of the game (where it shows each base has one person from Chad’s team on them) and in the term of sex. While you go out there dating - while it’s mostly douche bags and people using it ironically - your nosey friends may ask you how far you got.

“First, second, or third base?” They may ask. Or something like, “oh wow, did you get to home plate/base?” These are simply the rankings of the stages of a sexual relationship. First - kissing, sometimes just handholding, Second - making out, some light groping, Third - full on groping, no clothes come off, but it gets close. While each person has different boundaries, these are the general accepted definitions for the bases.

Home base is obviously full blown sexual intercourse. Since Chad has his “bases loaded” it means he’s done all these things before, just never gone completely to sexual intercourse with someone - in the terms of the song and the history we’ve already established, it’s most likely a male character. This is only proven by Chad’s uncomfortable nature towards Ryan (internalized Homophobia, thank you, returning theme) but his easy, and cocky personality towards everyone else. “bUt thAt DoEsnT pRovE” hush, that’s the final cherry on top. Remember this conversation.

It's easy - R

Again. Previous points have been made.

Take your best shot, just hit it - Ch

I've got what it takes, playin my game - Ch

So you better spin that pitch - Ch

You're gonna throw me, yeah - Ch

I'll show you how I swing - Ch

Ah, the famous “I’ll show you how i swing” a very strong baseball metaphor for everyone. Keeps queer people from defining themselves to dangerous (straight) people, and, well, that’s it actually. This term is mostly used by bi/pan people, though if you want to stay in the closet or are in a dangerous place, it is also used to subtly tell other queer people you are in fact, not straight. My favourite is when this term came into play when President Buchanan got elected in 1856 (for those that don’t know, he’s the first and only gay president).

You'll never know - R

Oh I know - Ch

If you never try - R

There's just one little thing - Ch

That stops me every time, yeah - Ch

This is again, the same lyric as before it doesn’t pan, and the tone is much different. The camera stays on Chad as he says this line, meaning he’s reflecting, he is now his own problem, the person that is keeping him back. His friends are not on his mind anymore, which is good, Ryan’s Gay Propaganda has been working.

Come on - Ch

I don't dance - Ch

I know you can - R

Not a chance, no, no - Ch

If I could do this, well, you could do that - R

But I don't dance - Ch

Hit it out of the park - R

I don't dance - Ch

I say you can - R

There's not a chance, oh no - Ch

Slide home, you score, swingin on the dance floor - Both

I don't dance, no - Ch

Lean back, tuck it in, take a chance - R

Swing it out, spin around, do the dance - R

I wanna play ball, not dance hall - Ch

I'm makin a triple, not a curtain cal - Chl

I can prove it to you til you know it's true - R

'Cause I can swing it, I can bring it to the diamond too - R

You're talkin a lot, show me what you got - Ch

Again, like the beginning of this song, this is a heavy base for flirting and sexual tension, which this song is drowning in.

Stop swinging - both

Hey - both

This is the part where they all start a flash mob in the middle of the baseball diamond. Again, alluding to the conversation I had to myself earlier, this only proves my own theory as no one takes notice of this. But, that’s not this essay, this is where I mention how close Chad and Ryan are at the end of the group dance.

Come on, swing it like this - both

Oh, swing - both

Jitterbug, just like that - both

That's what I mean, that's how you swing - both

You make a good pitch but I don't believe - both

Here is yet another (and the final) sexual innuendo. This is actually a rather quick one. Pitching in queer culture is considered the person who tops (because queer people even had to straight-ify their sex lives to “top” and “bottom”), this is the person who is giving, if you know what I’m saying.

I say you can - R

I know I can't - Ch

I don't dance - Ch

You can do it - R

I don't dance, no - Ch

Here is where that mosh pit ends, and how they get a little too close to comfort.

Nothing to it, atta boy, atta boy, yeah - both

The rest of this song is simply a mash-up of the baseball game being finished, and this lovely gem.

Now, clearly, Chad’s self conscious nature towards his sexuality is gone, he’s sitting close - if not squishing - Ryan, and talking to him like they’ve been friends forever. Take note of the change of close, most likely due to all the tension at the end of the song, and maybe a little of Chad’s own natural human curiosity built in. Now, I leave you with this note:

If there is anything that confirms all this more, its Chad’s girlfriend wearing the pride colours.

Also note: this could also be seen as a friend helping his bro discover his sexuality and fighting internalized homophobia, but, that’s ignoring the sexual tension, so go off I guess.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk.

Watch the full thing here

#high school musical 2 #ryan and chad #do they have a ship name?#troy bolton #high school musical #the original not the remake or whatever the kids have now #ryan evans #chad danforth #Sharpay evans #troy x gabriella #ryan/chad #that baseball scene #yall know what i'm talking about #i don't dance #the gayest scene ever #and gayest song #Anyways: the series #should I write that second essay?#thanks for coming to my ted talk

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doctorbunny · 3 years ago

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MILGRAM theory time: Haruka!

This isn't going to go super in depth (famous last words) but there's a few heavily debated parts of Haruka's MV I want to share my findings/thoughts on because I think this is my new special interest and during my quest to get best boy's song to 1 million views I have been looking over his first MV with a fine tooth comb so to speak.

Disclaimer: As the Jackalope said in the "This is the MILGRAM" trailer, we don't necessarily know everyone's crime from just the first video, its possible that a lot of things will be re-contextualized in the second MV, however I am not psychic or bilingual and thus will only be working with content released before August 20th 2021 and translated into English (which could cause some language/cultural details to be lost on me as translation is not a 1 to 1 process).

TW for discussions of ableism, child abuse, murder and animal death. Also this is really long so sorry to all the people that follow me for non-MILGRAM stuff

Firstly, I want to start on the topic of Haruka as a person. He is disabled. He does not have 'the mind of a child' (although he is 17, making him legally a minor in both North America and Japan). He is not just 'child-like'. And he is not mentally ill (well he might be, in the sense that many disabilities like Haruka's have strong comorbidities [where a person has two or more conditions but neither directly causes the other] with anxiety, depression and PTSD, but usually when I see people talk about him 'struggling with mental illness' they go on to refer to aspects of his disability). Sometimes on tumblr, people like myself, will see canonical traits written into a character and identify them as being traits associated with our disabilities/mental illness and headcanon them as such. Sometimes this even involves saying things like "It's basically canon!" Although we understand that these characters were probably not the result of a writer intending to write a disabled person. When I say that Haruka is being written as a person with a neurodevelopmental disability, I mean the writer intended to write a disabled character and wrote them in a way that they wanted the audience to pick up on. As an autistic person (which is one of many neurodevelopmental disorders and also something I probably didn't have to specify because who else would be writing an essay about a series they got into a few days ago at 11 o'clock at night) I really like how Haruka has been written so far. There's definitely some parts of him that have been exaggerated so abled normies can pick up on his disability (namely how his MV 's main motif is really child-like drawings) but the writers also included a lot of smaller details I appreciate like how it is noted he avoids eye contact when talking to other people and is depicted as nervously pulling at his sleeves in official artwork, or how he says he finds his prison uniform (which has tight straps) 'relaxing' and when he gets nervous/tense, he will dig his fingernails into the palm of his hands. (These last two potential being examples of 'self stimulation' [aka stimming] where a person seeks out specific sensory stimuli in order to help regulate their nervous system/emotions, in this case the tight uniform creates a comforting, secure feeling [you may have heard about some people preferring to sleep under weighted blankets for this reason] and digging nails into his palms sounds uncomfortable/painful but is done in an attempt to deal with a greater sensory discomfort caused by the situation/environment) I also appreciate the depth he is written with, he struggles to communicate verbally but in his MV and interactions with other inmates is shown to have insecurities, opinions and a consistent thought process (this is all basic character stuff but unfortunately not always present in disabled characters)

Also I want to add that (in terms of what we've been shown so far) Haruka did not kill anyone because of his disability/mental illness. Disabled people are not inherently more innocent than abled people. But there is no disability/mental illness where a symptom is that you kill people and real people have to live with the stigma when you speak carelessly and suggest things like "Haruka is the kind of mentally ill person who kills people as a cry for help" 🧂 (or at the very least real people have to read BS like that and cringe). TL;DR Haruka is less child-like and more onion-like (as in, he has layers) 🧅🧅🧅

Now is the actual theory stuff, oops:

Every prisoner in MILGRAM is supposed to have committed murder in some way, obviously considering Yuno just had an abortion (which i personally do not consider an act of murder) whilst Mu literally stabbed someone to death, this definition is stretched a bit. But it is not agreed upon yet who Haruka killed/how many people he killed or why he killed.

In his MV he is shown to have chased after his dog into a forest, seen something off-screen, then beaten something into a messy pulp with a rock. Some people think the dog is a red herring and that Haruka actually killed his mother/the girl from the fireworks show/his brother. I do not agree.

First: I believe Haruka when he says he doesn't have a brother. The MV literally starts by Haruka looking in the mirror and then switching between the him now

and a really similar looking younger child who just so happened to be a key feature of his memories (I don't have the vocabulary to explain it but its like cinematic parallels that establish this is the same person at different points of their life)

Its not impossible that this is Haruka's secret younger brother, but i think its unlikely. I saw someone saying they had to be different people because Haruka looks less happy than the child but like, most 17 year olds are less visibly happy than when they were 7 (or however old the child is meant to be). Life happens.

So when Haruka is shown pushing the child around and eventually strangling him, this isn't meant to be literal (homicide or suicide), but a representation of how conflicted Haruka feels about his younger self, who may have committed the murder (if you've ever been kept awake cringing at memories of something you said in the past and wishing you could go slap some sense into your former self, this is like that but 10 times more self loathing). The lyric "I am always repeating yesterday," implies he might think about this specific past event a lot.

Moving on, its pretty well accepted that Haruka's parents were abusive in some way and Haruka internalised a lot of it: he constantly apologises, he says in his interrogation questions that his one wish come true is that "[he] want[s] to be loved" and describes in his MV how when he couldn't find the words he was looking for ("you're unfair") one of his parents "would get angry at me and say “You’re hopeless.”". He seems to know its unfair but also still says he 'loves' his family, possibly mistakenly believing it is his fault, but also showing an awareness of his situation (and how his parents might behave).

Now, the MV is stylised in a way that makes certain details unclear, but there is one clear detail showing that Haruka's dog was killed

This is the first close up of Haruka and the dog. Haruka's mother is just out of frame supervising, but they look pretty happy. Notice how the puppy has a silvery chain for a collar. Somehow, this dog gets out of the house but only Haruka is shown chasing after it (whether his mother was searching elsewhere or didn't bother following her disabled son into the forest is unclear). Either way, young Haruka is now in the forest, unsupervised.

By the time he finds the dog, there is already blood, suggesting it was initally attacked by something else.

is this a sigh of relief from a boy whose finally found his beloved pet or a jealous weakling glad that nature took its course and he is finally free of that meddling mutt stealing all his mummy's attention? /j

I think this shock at the discovery that 'there is blood on his hands' could imply that rather than literally getting the blood from his dog, Haruka has seen his already injured dog and realises that if the dog got out because of him (he is previously shown to be aware his parents seem to blame him for everything) then he is the reason his dog is injured/dying and will be blamed for it. (this scene plays over the lyrics "It’s fine, though it’s really not It’s really fine, though I don’t really think so When I tried to understand it, You’ll make that disappointed face again" suggesting he is trying to avoid making his parents disappointed and letting the family pet escape into danger is something that could make them very disappointed)

now we get into rock murder (this is present-day Haruka implying that this is either: not how the scene really played out; the writers really wanting the audience to know that this was Haruka's doing and not someone else's; or this turns into a separate incident that happened much later [although note that the red sky and blue moon is the same as when young Haruka first appears at the start])

b the corpse is beyond mangled now, but its clearly the dog because the silver chain collar is still there, to the right of the body. (circled in red for your convenience :3)

My hypothesis is: Haruka didn't set out to kill his dog, but upon finding it injured (we don't know the severity aside from bleeding and also it not being able to run away from Haruka kneeling down above it w/ a big rock so it could range from treatable with a lot of vet help to already on death's door, TBH I don't think Haruka would know the difference) He knew he'd be blamed for this; made into a villain who let the poor puppy come to harm. He panicked and killed the dog out of some idea that it would make him the victim here (since he'd be found crying over a dog corpse, which might make a parent go comfort him rather than getting angry about what could've happened to the dog). This is over the lyrics: "I cried, I screamed I wanted to be a pitied and loved weakling I was in denial, I was in denial I just had to make sure I’ve become a victim, I’ve become a victim" (there's another theory that he was also jealous of the dog, which could work here too, since this is not some calculated plot; rather its a rash decision) This ties in with his Japanese song title (translated as Weakness) which is a play on a phrase sort of like "The strong eat, the weak do not" to become "The weak are eaten by society" or "The weak eat each other to survive" [once again I am reminding everyone this is based on second hand information from the youtube comments section (from users mitchki and Alphaistic) because I do not speak Japanese] This second meaning (The weak eat each other to survive) makes sense under the reading that Haruka killed his dog in order to 'survive' making his parents disappointed for the dog escaping.

Miscellaneous points:

We don't know where Haruka's necklace came from yet, it must be a gift since the most expensive thing he's ever bought was cotton candy. The younger child in the video isn't wearing it and neither is his mother or the girl in the purple dress.

Haruka's home seems quite big, at the start we can see a large flower garden outside the window and there's a forest in walking distance. This might suggest his family is quite wealthy

Haruka probably did go to school at some point as homeschooling is not a legally accepted as an alternative to public schools in Japan. (However it is estimated that up to 5000 families homeschool, this is uncommon) A lot (about 62%) of Japanese schools apparently have a 'special needs' classes and there are about 505 schools focused on educating intellectually disabled students (although I do not know which sort Haruka would've needed as whilst intellectual and development disabilities can be comorbid they aren't the same). Now, if children aged 7-14 don't go to school, their parents receive a fine, but its possible that if Haruka's parents are wealthy, they just paid it to avoid sending him to school. (This might imply they wanted to hide him or were generally ashamed of him in some way) However high school education (for students over 14) is not legally required and its likely that even if Haruka went to elementary/middle school, he hasn't been around people his own age in at least 3 years. As he seems quite lonely and glad that the other prisoners give him attention.

I don't think Haruka's parents are divorced and if they are, its not his father who left. Haruka mentions in the 30 questions that he thinks he disappointed his father. But still includes him as part of his family ("My father and mother and me"). A theory I've seen is that his father was disappointed by his son being disabled and left. but developmental disabilities (especially in non verbal and semi verbal children like Haruka) can be diagnosed before the age of 3, so I feel it is unlikely that Haruka would bring up his father if he left that early in Haruka's life

All MILGRAM prisoners have covered one of DECO*27's older vocaloid songs (DECO*27 is a well known producer who composes the music for MILGRAM) Haruka covered 'Two Breaths Walking' (https://youtu.be/puXLfVWrz2Q) which is about a boy's first relationship and how his mother's jealousy set him up for failure as the relationship becomes toxic (specifically it has some very funny out of context lines like "Whose breasts are you sucking on now?") so yeah, mommy issues: the song (Also: some people say in the song, the boy kills the girl at the end, but this isn't literal, TBW is the first of a trilogy of songs about the same relationship, it is followed by Android girl then Two Breaths Walking: Reloaded and the story resolves with the couple reuniting as adults and getting in the relationship again, although its not necessarily as abusive as before, its still implied to be codependant ending on the line 'We should live like oxygen tanks, sucking breathe from the words each of us exhale, until our last breathe')

In all seriousness, the scene where younger Haruka is walking through the city with his mother but it keeps repeating until older Haruka pulls the younger one away might indicate an attempt to focus the happier memories of his parents (since this is also over the lyrics "Why is it breaking? Tell me why? Please don’t change If I tried and couldn’t say it, You would get angry at me and say “You’re hopeless.”" which depict a worse scene) I think both his parents are still physically present but have become far more emotionally distant, not giving him as much attention, which exacerbates his loneliness from not having any friends his own age to talk to

And if one of his parents did leave? I think its likely his mother since she is shown disappearing out of his reach after the dog-incident (inferring she got angry/disappointed in Haruka anyway) This could also be where he got his necklace from: Its something his mother used to wear (although this is 100% a guess) and that's why its shown to be important to him

This one is just me, but i didn't realise until a rewatch that when Haruka is watching the younger him and the girl running together, the background has fireworks. Haruka mentions fireworks being a key memory to him so I wonder if this was one of the first/last times he got to make a friend...

On three separate occasions in the interrogation, Haruka mentions not liking animals. Despite this, he is depicted as sleeping with a rabbit plush and on his birthday art (I'd include that too but tumblr only allows 10 pictures per post, so here's a link) he is standing next to a giant blueberry and strawberry cake with two bunny themed biscuits at the side. Through my experiences of seeing Japanese fandom art on pixiv, sometimes rabbits are used to insinuate a character is cute and timid in fanart.

Meaningless details: Haruka sleeps with his necklace on; he sleeps on a bed and not a futon; at first I thought he woke up holding his plush's hand but his hand is merely next to the toy; and considering the state of the pillow and blanket, I wonder if he moves a lot in his sleep or if the is just because in this case he seems to be waking up from a nightmare about the dog incident...

Final note: I've spent so many hours writing this I don't remember if i was building up to any big finale or not but I hope you enjoyed reading this! Feel free to add on in the comments/reblogs.

#haruka sakurai #milgram #milgram theory #001 #text post #essay #long post

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the-untamed-obsession · 4 years ago

Note

Can you do if ever.. JC + LXC and WWX + LWJ and last but not the least Sizhui ( I enjoyed the part 2 of the fic ) having a fight with you but they make it up to you?

GUESS WHO’S GONNA DO THIS FOR ALL THE OTHERS 🥲 THATS RIGHT! Me ^w^ anyway I hope you like it💖 I REALLY enjoyed writing this!

First Fight P1!

Sizhui:

You two rarely argue, it’s a blessing. But when you do, it can be mildly intense.

Usually, your arguments always consist of you worrying about him and him thinking you’re underestimating him.

Your first argument was just that. You were worried he would get himself killed if he wasn’t careful. He got upset and assured you he’d be fine but you didn’t let up, practically begging him to stay with you. He got angry because he thought you didn’t believe in his abilities.

It was pretty intense. You two weren’t SCREAMING at each other, but you’d gotten pretty loud.

You two didn’t speak to each other for about 3 days. Your friends hated it and you often went to Wei Wuxian to complain. He helped ease your worries, claiming Sizhui was more than capable and you had nothing to worry about.

Both of you met up and apologized. You apologized for making it seem like you didn’t believe in him while he apologized for yelling at you and getting angry.

Jiang Cheng + Lan Xichen

Never. You three usually never argue BECAUSE Lan Xichen is usually there to stop you. Without him, you two would probably argue quite a bit. But they’re always small meaningless arguments. Nothing ever serious.

If the two of you were left alone, you would only have minor arguments. Mainly about you telling him to lighten up since he often came off really strict, even though he was clan leader. They were never concerning and he often got over them rather quickly.

Your first argument, between all 3 of you, happened because of this diplomatic mission thing. Both of them had to go to a nearby clan and try to build a healthy relationship. They wanted you to attend but you were nervous. Unfortunately, the argument got quite heated very quickly. There had been a huge misunderstanding. You were too scared to attend but both of them thought you had been ashamed of your relationship. Jiang Cheng got angry while Lan Xichen fell silent, unable to say anything. He was human after all and he couldn’t stop every argument.

It was pretty intense. You and Jiang Cheng were screaming at each other and Lan Xichen tried to stop it but somehow got caught up and started arguing with you too. He did try to defend you as well, which in turn made the argument between him and Jiang Cheng for a minute. It wasn’t pretty at all, instead it was rather explosive.

You three didn’t speak to each other for at least a week. It was so bad that Lan Wangji had to step in, trying to help every way he could. He talked to his brother, while Wei Wuxian talked to you, and attempted to talk to Jiang Cheng.

Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji came to you to figure out what really happened since Jiang Cheng and Lan Xichen refused to talk further on the matter. While you talked with the two, you quickly figured out everything was caused by a simple misunderstanding. You met with your boyfriends not too long after the talk and explained that you were never ashamed of them, just nervous because you’d be up against so many officials. You weren’t a noble by any means and you didn’t want to look bad on them. Of course, they assured you that wasn’t the case at all and that they loved you no matter what anyone thought. This became the main reason you three worked on communication, such a terrifying argument came from such a small misunderstanding.

Lan Wangi + Wei Wuxian

Arguments are not only rare, but pretty unheard of. Wei Wuxian doesn’t often take things to heart, so he’ll just get over something quickly, while Lan Wangji doesn’t argue. You also don’t let things get to you, so anything that COULD be a potential argument can’t ever come to be. You three are just good at communication.

If you were to have any type of argument it would probably be related to Wei Wuxian’s ability to just start conflict. He’s pretty good at it and usually doesn’t think before he taunts someone.

Your first ever argument was pretty stupid but it turned into a catastrophe very quickly. It started with you saying you wished you could’ve seen his swordsmanship back in the day. Wei Wuxian explained that he chose not to use Suibian after he’d given up his golden core to his sworn brother. Your experiences with Jiang Cheng were less than desirable so you’d always had a deep dislike for the man. You’d offhandedly mentioned that giving his core to Jiang Cheng was a waste and it would’ve been better if he’d kept it. Of course, this was one of those things Wei Wuxian just couldn’t let go, so it quickly turned into an argument. It got worse and worse and when Lan Wangji tried to stop you two, both of you spewed out some less than nice things at him as well. So he inadvertently ended up getting pulled into the argument too.

You and Wei Wuxian refused to speak to each other and Lan Wangji found it kind of hard to try to help you two, he was upset and hurt too. After three days, the anxiety set in for all of you. You three had ALWAYS be together and so not talking for three days was just odd. It became harder to sleep and time felt like it barely moved during the day.

Eventually, you all caved and quickly went to find each other. The first thing you did was hug each other and start profusely apologizing. Then you all sat down and talked it out. Wei Wuxian understands why you and Lan Wangji would harbor negative feelings for Jiang Cheng, but at the same time he still loved and cared for his sworn brother. You agreed that you may have been a little bit upset, but you would try to respect him regardless. Jiang Cheng had been through a lot, so his feelings were also valid. You and Wei Wuxian also apologized to Lan Wangji for hurting him when he was only trying to help. He immediately accepted your apologies and added he understood you were both just angry and would never mean to say such things. You three definitely spent the next week trying to make it up to each other.

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miraculouscontent · 4 years ago

Text

Didn’t Need Burrow (April 24th-May 3rd)

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: Marinette is exposed to the world as Ladybug by the end of the series. This is largely so Adrien gets to bask in everyone knowing that HE ended up with Paris' protector on his arm, emphasizing her status as a trophy that he won.

This feels too likely, I hate it.

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: After being badgered into trusting her with the Fox, Marinette tries to convince Alya that she can't expose herself as Rena Rouge any further, and should take advantage of the Fox's long-range capabilities to stay hidden. Alya dismisses the danger; if she tries hiding at all, it doesn't take long to reveal herself, claiming it's unheroic to hide. Shadowmoth then targets her personally, with Marinette taking the blame.

I WOULD EXCUSE THE FOX THING IF IT STAYED LONG RANGE BUT I’M WAITING FOR THEM TO RUIN IT

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: Rather than outing Ladybug, Alya reveals *herself* as Rena Rouge. She claims that this is fine since Hawkmoth already knows her secret identity... and besides, it gives the LadyBlog more cred!

Because why not I guess, the bar for her is already so low.

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: Marinette will be forced to give up Guardianship/go through the memory wipe... but continue as Ladybug. This is mined for Sadrien AND resets LadyNoir; she no longer recalls all the annoying shit he's pulled, offering a fresh start. May lead into Reversed Rectangular Romance with Chat Noir pining after the old Ladybug while she develops a crush on her brooding partner. He's so ~dark~ and ~mysterious~ and gives her such ~wistful looks~!

Marinette gets to give up guardianship but at what cost. (also, that last line about Chat being dark and brooding)

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: In a Shocking Twist, Emilie is revealed to have been evil and manipulative like Chloe/Lila, and presented as solely responsible for her husband's jerkassery. This sets up GabNath as endgame with Gabriel absolved for all his misdeeds. (Any similarities between Emilie and her son's behavior are summarily ignored.)

Because Adrien is male, obviously. He gets a pass.

Anonymous said:

Didn't need the Burrow: A lot of Adrien's supposed childhood friendship with Chloe was actually with Zoe. Which is supposed to give the new character some instant connections and serves as another proof of Chloe being irredeemable. Bonus: Marinette finds out and whether or not she spills the beans, it will be something she'll get called out for.

So, either a retcon or Adrien comes off as even more of a liar in “Origins.”

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: Su-Han will tell Marinette outright that her responsibilities mean she's not allowed to be happy. This is used to garner sympathy for HIM - Isn't it sad how his duties have completely consumed his life? Clearly he needs help learning how to unwind and relax! Meanwhile Mari's drowning in the background, but this isn't about HER, now is it?

I’M SO SAD

WHYYY

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: Adrien discovers Gabriel's secret and hides the truth, forbidding Plagg from telling anyone. Not just to protect his father/family, but because he's not ready to stop being Chat Noir. No villains means no reason for heroes, and he doesn't even know his lady's secret identity yet--! Naturally, his reasoning is treated as totally understandable and sympathetic, even as he enables the conflict to continue indefinitely.

“CHAT BLANC” VERSION 2.0 I HATE IT DX

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: Hawk/Shadowmoth starts aiming to *kill* the exposed/temp heroes in order to prevent them from potentially joining battles. This only happens during akuma fights (so that it falls upon Ladybug to 'set things right' with her powers). Chat Noir makes minimal (if any) effort to protect them, relying upon his 'partner' to carry the day instead and bring them back.

Ladybug: *trying to save everyone*

Chat Noir: *filing his claws in the background*

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: Marinette will be pressured to make others permanent heroes and let them have their Miraculi full-time. This sets up for Hawkmoth to eventually get his hands on the Miracle Box, meaning any Miraculi that haven't been distributed are now in the villains' clutches. Not only does this dramatically cut down her pool of allies, Marinette gets to be guilt-stricken over failing all her duties and not listening to their demands while she had the chance.

Marinette, you’re such a fAilUrE as guardian!!

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: Zoe will turn out to be another love interest for Adrien - only it's as the New-Bee with *Chat Noir*, enabling the dreaded Reversed Romo-Rhombus dynamic with Ladybug becoming jealous of their chemistry.

girls are such jealous types, haven’t you guys heard? :)

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: Ladybug gets a new default look (for the sake of selling more ML merch in Real Life), trading the spotted onesie for another form-fitting spandex suit that 'highlights her feminine charms' even more. This is treated as a sign of her 'growing up'.

wow i hate it

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: Alya shipping Marinette with both Adrien and Chat Noir after finding out her identity.

I am 100% not here for shipping shenanigans.

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: Alya will be responsible for leading Lila to suspect that Marinette and Ladybug are connected. Though Alya may actually *realize* that she slipped up, she won't warn Marinette about the potential security breach, not wanting her to get upset/any more paranoid than she already is.

And of course, this will be used to make people “sympathize” with her. See, she cAreS about Marinette’s feelings, how can you be mad at her for this??

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: There will be more plots where Marinette's 'lesson of the week' is that she must learn how to better control and suppress her emotions, and that she is literally not ALLOWED to be upset because Hawk/Shadowmoth will win if she does. At the same time, Adrien is encouraged to marinate in his own unhappiness over Ladybug not giving in to his advances. If the danger involved ever comes up, it's presented as purely Ladybug/Marinette's fault for rejecting him.

I’m starting to think some of you are ZAG insiders because wow that sounds likely. DX

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: A recurring theme in episodes featuring the 'girl squad' will be Marinette meddling too much, as her efforts to help them cross boundaries THEY aren't comfortable with. If she dares to bring up their past insistence that friends don't keep secrets, they'll call her out as a hypocrite while refusing to acknowledge their own hypocrisies.

“Marinette’s boundaries? Who??? No, Marinette, what about THEIR boundaries???” - the writers

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: Adrien will feel sorry for Chloe and regret the role he played in her losing her Miraculous. This is mainly a vehicle to help explain why everything that went wrong with her/Queen Bee is totally, 100% Marinette/Ladybug's fault, along with showing how forgiving Adrien is and how he 'sees the best in everyone', and is clearly right to do so. Bonus: this is combined with him distrusting the NewBee for not being Chloe/making her jealous.

*sigh*

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: Chloe will get akumatized out of anger over the New Bee, and Ladybug is blamed for her insensitivity/forced to apologize to her.

I’m still stunned at the mental gymnastics they go through to make Marinette/Ladybug apologize to people.

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: Su-Han will confirm the popular fan claim that Ladybug and Black Cat bearers are, in fact, soulmates/bound together by destiny. Chat Noir gleefully rubs this in Ladybug's face; her disbelief and horror is played entirely for laughs at her expense. Adrien's behavior escalates further afterwards, bolstered by the knowledge that it doesn't matter how shitty he gets, as she belongs to him regardless.

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: In addition to confirming the notion that Ladybugs and Black Cats are 'meant to be', it's revealed that other Miracli are destined soulmates, like Foxes and Turtles or Butterflies and Peacocks, and other random Miraculi pairings that 'coincidentally' align with various official ships.

brb, need to step away to scream on my porch

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: At least one episode will have Marinette mess up a potion, preventing her and the other heroes from enjoying its benefits during a big fight. This is blamed either on her anxiety causing her to overthink it or on her being a poor student, lamenting the fact that she didn't have more time with Master Fu. (Bonus if Su-Han takes advantage of this to slam Fu; extra bonus points if Mari defends him by insisting *she* was the one who screwed up, not her master.)

It’s like a main course of Marinette blame, oh my god.

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: Su-Han will make various sexist comments about Marinette and the other heroines, implying that they were all poor choices Because Girl. Since nothing says 'Girl Power' like insisting they must prove themselves to doubtful men who will never fully accept them. After all, Marinette is the only one who ever learns lessons; therefore, Su-Han will never grow out of his 'old-fashioned views'.

And when the writers are called out, they’ll go, “bUt hE’s jUst oLd fAshiOned”

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: Adrien gets his Ring revoked by Su-Han for misbehavior. This is depicted as a terrible miscarriage of justice, and Marinette must convince Su-Han to return the Ring without learning who Chat Noir is. The more terrible the inciting act, the bigger the bonus points; did he skip another battle like Glaciator? Pull another Syren-level stunt? Cataclysm another innocent? Who cares? Sadrien is Sad, and that's the biggest crisis of all...

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: Adrien pulls another Syren-level stunt (or worse); rather than holding him responsible, Su-Han berates Marinette for her poor leadership and failure to keep him in line. Bonus if she confides/vents to Alya afterwards only for Alya to AGREE with Su-Han that she's failed at being a good partner to Chat Noir. Fever Mode activates if Alya implies Marinette's failure is due to her inability to admit her feelings for Chat Noir and/or confess to Adrien.

I don’t know whether to laugh or cry.

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: Alya will pull an Adrien re: Lila, refusing to openly support Marinette against her. She'll claim that they need to 'gather evidence' first before exposing her to everyone. In practice, this means that Alya is willing to continue feigning ignorance, pretending that she's taken in by Lila's lies, while Marinette continues to suffer since she won't play along. Any evidence-gathering we see Alya engaging in is minimal, if she's shown doing it at all.

This is 150% one of the most accurate Alya-Lila confrontations I’ve seen from these predictions.

I hate it.

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: When confronting Lila, Alya will insist that 'Ladybug told me herself' that they aren't friends. Lila attempts to convince her that Ladybug is lying to try and protect her; this either works or spurs Alya to declare that LB 'hates liars', making her suspicious of Marinette's potential connections to the superheroine.

Alya

Alya why

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: Alya will only treat Marinette with anything approaching a veneer of respect while she's Ladybug. (As in 'Transformed/wearing the spotted suit/actively superheroing'.) Her behavior towards her 'regular BFF', meanwhile, will continue to degrade.

and, as a alternative:

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: Having learned that Marinette = Ladybug, Alya shows less and less respect towards the superheroine. (Not that she displayed much in the first place, but you know what they say: familiarity breeds contempt. And Alya's convinced that she knows her SO WELL, despite all signs to the contrary...)

Thanks. Hate them both. T_T

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: Alya will end up outing Ladybug in a moment of anger. Though this is treated as impulsive and spur-of-the-moment, the act itself hints otherwise. (For example, she posts it on the LadyBlog; that post had to be *written up* first, and she likely had to think about what evidence she'd use to back up her claim... Not to mention if she includes pictures or video. Showing that Alya thought about it well before her 'tipping point', no matter how she claims otherwise.)

okay but you missed the part where Marinette is blamed for it--

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: Tikki's comments about kwamis not understanding love are foreshadowing that they will later claim that Ladybug and Chat Noir's relationship has shown them what true love is. Because none of the other relationships they've ever seen or experienced in their long, looooooong history compare to the Four-Cornered F**kery.

Tikki sure knew a lot about love when she commented on all of Marinette’s love issues.

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: Kagami will come to regret 'impulsively' breaking up with Adrien for being a lying jerkface, while Luka moves on and finds happiness with somebody else with relative ease. Because guys are allowed to move on with their lives while girls have to wallow in the miserable mires of wish-you-were-(still)-mine. Woes--!

no but see Adrien is “worthy” of love while Marinette isn’t

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: Marinette is either responsible for the secret Juleka's keeping (such as trusting her with a Miraculous) or inadvertently sets Rose on its scent in the first place, making her *supposedly* responsible for the strife which follows.

We already know that it’s not Juleka’s secret at least but Marinette could absolutely still set Rose off.

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: Marinette will be taught techniques/given a power-up that shuts off her emotions completely, or simply reaches the point where she figures out how to do so on her own. This is ultimately shown to be a bad thing/another mistake not because of the toll it takes on her psyche, but because the fully repressed Marinette/Ladybug no longer has any interest whatsoever in Adrien, and *we can't have THAT!*

Us getting to see Marinette not crushing on Adrien... but at what cost?

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: Alya posts more embarrassing content on the LadyBlog, making it look like Ladybug keeps screwing up/making mistakes. Marinette asks her to stop, worried that she's undermining people's faith in her; Alya blows off her concerns and accuses her of getting a swelled head/becoming a 'control freak' about her image, insisting it's no big deal if people see she's human while refusing to treat her as such. (Meanwhile none of Chat Noir's mistakes/misbehavior make it onto the blog.)

“Bonus” if Alya gets particularly huffy because it’s jOunrAliSm and she’d be bIAsEd if she took down something that made her fRiEnD uNComOFTablE.

elflynns-horde-of-stuff said:

Don't need a burrow: The upcoming episode "Guiltrip" is gonna be 50% Sadrien. And we won't even get any new developments on his character for it.

so the usual

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: It's revealed that Ladybug holders are 'natural good luck charms' for everybody around them, but are punished by karmic backlash for even the *slightest* hint of selfishness (or self-consideration). Hence Marinette's whole plight, which is still presented as her fault for not being able to reach an impossibly perfect ideal. (Anything we learn about Black Cat holders, meanwhile, is purely for Agrestangst and has no bearing on anything observable within the show itself.)

Honestly, with the bad luck Marinette had in “Origins,” you’d think she’d be meant for the cat and been taught about the values of destruction and just being able to Go Off on people, or how to spin her bad luck into something good (or the black cat miraculous in general helps her channel her bad luck, such as making her Cataclysm stronger or being able to give her bad luck to others).

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: The show ends with Marinette and Adrien getting together, with Marinette declaring that everything she went through was worth it and that she's 'incredibly lucky' -- that the fact fate brought them together is 'nothing short of Miraculous!'

The sheer level at which I just cringed in immeasurable.

Anonymous said:

Didn't need the Burrow: A S5 episode will drop before S4 is finished.

Oh! Ahaha, we’ve got a wavelength, anon! I actually already added that one at some point.

Anonymous said:

Didn't need the Burrow: The series will not really make Rose/Juleka canon. They will imply it but the official language used in the episode will be "best friends". Yet on Twitter the creators will pat themselves on the back repeatedly for it

I mean, this already partially happened in “Reflekdoll” so--

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: It'll be confirmed beyond any reasonable doubt that Adrien 100% knows about Marinette's crush when he uses it to manipulate her. Plagg comments on it, and Adrien affirms that he knows, but her feelings don't compare to his own for Ladybug. ('And aren't worth sparing' goes unsaid, but is naturally implied.) Naturally, his manipulation of her is treated as 'clever', and any pain or mortification she feels as a result is just gravy.

Anonymous said:

Didn't Need Burrow: Adrien reveals to Plagg (and the audience) that he's fully aware of Marinette's crush, but refuses to acknowledge it because he doesn't want to 'crush her dreams', comparing it to how Ladybug keeps rejecting him. Making the situation entirely about HIM and how HE feels, even showing some resentment towards her for HAVING that crush for HIM to deal with. Marinette and her feelings are painted as just an ANNOYANCE that he's ignoring, heedless of the impact upon her.

wow i hate them both

thank you, both of you

</3

#category: salt #Didn't Need Burrow

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buckyownsmylife · 4 years ago

Text

Not About Angels - Sebastian Stan Fluff

The one where, after you die, you find out that the love of your life isn’t really who you thought he was.

Warnings: Devil!Seb AU. hellish themes? Bit of smutty conversation. Light angst. Mentions of death without details That’s pretty much it.

A/N: I’m already working on a smutty part II that picks up where this one stops, so hype me up on that and it might come sooner rather than later

Seb’s P.O.V.

“Sir?” Sebastian looked at the demon who had just joined him in his throne room with only partial interest. “That thing that you asked us to warn you about has just happened.” And just like that, he was out of his room in a flash, eager to see you again. Of course, in the actual life, he had just left you to “work”, as he had been doing every day since he met you by chance in one of his visits to the land of the living, but he had no idea when he had kissed you goodbye, that today was the day you would join him in the afterlife. Your forever was about to start, and he itched to touch you, kiss you, to have you in his arms again even if not much time had passed.

He wasn’t sure how long it had been, actually. Time worked differently around here, but even though it was longer, to him it felt like an eternity until he found your confused eyes staring back at him in the hall of his own home.

“Seb? W-what is going on?” Suddenly, he felt as if his heart was dropping to his stomach. He hadn’t thought this through. You were scared, that much was clear by the way your fingers trembled and how you chewed on your bottom lip. The same bottom lip he had feasted on so many times before.

And that much was to be expected, wasn’t it? You had just died, and here you were, in hell. All because of him.

“Seb?” You took a step closer to him, reaching out for the man you loved and all he could do was stare emptily back at you. His heart pounded against his chest as he thought over what he had done. What it meant now that you were here with him.

“What did they tell you?” You blinked twice, before completely comprehending what he’d said. He hadn’t meant to sound so harsh and cold, he was just terrified at the prospect of you hating him for what he did.

“W-what?”

“What. Did. They. Tell. You?” He didn’t miss the way you flinched at his tone, he couldn’t. Not only was he completely attuned to you, it would also be visible to anyone from a mile away.

“N-not much. They didn’t tell me… Nothing at all, actually. They just�� Asked me to wait here. For you.” The sight of her water-filled eyes broke my heart and forced me to look away, out of the window, at the bright lights of a city that I had created and looked over. My heart felt heavy now, as I tried to urge myself to look at her again and explain everything.

“What do you remember?” I monotonously asked, still not staring at her, although I could see her fidgeting with her fingers from the corner of my eyes.

“Again, n-not much. I remember…” I could have seen exactly when she realized what had happened, I knew it was coming from the way she suddenly dropped her arms and let out a tiny, “Oh.” But I didn’t. I closed my eyes instead, my hands tucked all the way inside my pants’ pockets as I waited for the inevitable outcome of what would happen. Only it never did. Instead, I felt a tiny, warm hand pressed against my cheek, carefully asking me for attention.

I could never refuse her. I couldn’t when she was alive, there was no way I’d be able to start doing that now. So I looked down at her, finding her bright eyes filled with a warmth I was used to seeing directed at me but was in no way expecting to still be in the receiving end of it in such a circumstance.

The feeling of her touch on my skin was enough to break my control and I found myself wrapping my arms around her waist, pulling her body close to mine while our eyes remained connected.

“I died, didn’t I?” I could only nod as I tightened my grip around her, scared to see her run away from me. “Baby…” Her own grip on me tightened, both of her hands holding my face now. “Where am I?” Sighing, I dropped my head to connect her forehead to mine.

Y/N’s P.O.V.

Sebastian looked… guilty as he finally raised his gaze to mine again. “You’re… you’re in hell, darling.” Perhaps I should have felt something other than curiosity, but as I remained tightly embraced by the man I loved, I just couldn’t find it in myself to care. So I just snorted. That made him raise an eyebrow at me, an incredulous look on his face. “Did you just… Are you finding this amusing, doll?”

I broke down in a fit of laughter as he tried to contain his own chuckle, at last dropping his hands from my body. He allowed me to bend over in an effort to gather air into my lungs. “Y-yes, I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I just never thought I’d end up here.” That seemed to have been the wrong thing to say, by the way his smile dropped and he started to avoid my eyes again. “Okay, enough of this, my love. Will you tell me what is going on?” I cautiously approached him again until I was able to wrap my arms around his torso this time.

“What do you want to know?” Good, he returned my hug. We were making progress.

“Well, now that I know where I am, I would like to know why you’re here. Did you happen to die at the same time as I did? Did you…” As the thought passed over my brain, I couldn’t help but to gasp loudly as I pulled him to look at me again. “Sebastian freaking Stan, tell me you didn’t kill yourself when you heard I had died.”

My boyfriend looked very conflicted at my display of anxiety. On one hand, I felt like he was trying very hard not to laugh at my question, but at the same time, I saw in his eyes he was very concerned about something.

“Come on, baby. Talk to me. I won’t judge… Well, I will most definitely be angry at you, but you have to remember that I love you and I’ll get over it eventually.” I watched as he screwed his eyes shut very tightly before answering.

“No, I didn’t die.” Well, that didn’t serve to lessen my confusion.

“Then…”

“You’re asking the wrong question, darling.” That shut me up, but only for a second.

“What was I supposed to be asking?” I felt his thumbs softly caressing my hips, just like he always did. It relaxed me, but only a little. I suppose that much was expected, given the situation.

“Why you are here.” Huh. That was not what I was expecting him to suggest to me. It hadn’t even crossed my mind, actually. I had just accepted the fact that I was here, and that was it. I mean, did I know that I hadn’t committed any major sins while alive? Yeah, of course. Just as I was sure that I must have committed a lot of minor ones that would interfere with my path to heaven. It had just always been the way I saw the possible afterlife. I figured only actual saints and martyrs went to heaven, while the rest of us would be trapped in hell or its equivalent.

“I don’t care,” I explained, shrugging as I hugged him to me again. “Whatever it is, at least it brought me to you. If you’re here too, I’m glad I’m not in heaven. It wouldn’t be heaven to me. Not without you.”

Seb’s P.O.V.

Fuck. How the fuck was I supposed to do this? I had to, though. She deserved as much.

“Baby…” I started, carefully pulling away from her so I could watch her face. She frowned, probably confused about why I didn’t want to hug her anymore. “There’s something you don’t know about me.”

I pulled her with me so we’d get out of the entrance hall and further into the house. She silently let me drag her through all of the main floor, and though I didn’t turn around to look at her, I knew she’d be staring at my house with a gaping mouth.

It was a bit much, even I could admit.

But for now, I didn’t have the time to give her the tour or explain my decor choices. Perhaps after I was done with my story, if she still wanted to be with me.

Please, let her still want me.

We finally made our way to the back balcony, and I brought her to my garden. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d been here, but it was still well-kept by some of my demons - well, as well-kept as I liked it to be. I’d always enjoyed the more overgrown look, so that was the theme of my backyard. Except for the little path that took us to the fountain, dark green dominated the environment, and I hoped she would like it.

If she didn’t, she could always change it however she wanted, if she decided to stay.

Please, make her decide to stay.

We stopped in front of the fountain. Once there, I let go of her hand and finally turned to look her in the eyes again.

“Seb?” She asked, confused. I took my time to memorize her just like that, still in love with me, still trusting in the person she believed me to be.

Please, don’t let her change her mind.

Sighing, I took off my overcoat, letting it drop to the floor, before slowly starting to unbutton my black shirt. I watched her the entire time. She was frowning, definitely trying to understand what was going on, and she looked so cute that it hurt.

I knew she remembered what I had in my back. In the living world, it translated into a black tattoo of wings. Here, they were real.

And so I spread them, something I hadn’t done in what felt like forever. Why would I? I had no reason to fly anymore. It was just something I used to do. It reminded me too much of home, of how things were when I was still up there.

And I didn’t want to remember. I had no reason to.

Yet I had to admit that the feeling of flying, even if it was actually just hovering a few feet up in the air, felt freeing. For a few seconds, I was able to forget my anxiety and just appreciate that I was still able to do this. It felt like stretching a muscle that hadn’t been used in a really long time.

But then I had to open my eyes and face the reality that I was living in. So I looked down and found Y/N staring up at me with indecipherable eyes.

I stayed up in the air for a little bit longer, trying to gather whatever sort of reaction I could so I could be prepared for whichever outcome was waiting for me when I touched the ground again. Alas, there were no visible tells, so with a resigned sigh, I came down and closed my wings.

We both stood there, looking at each other in perfect silence, and it felt like there was a battle going on between the two of us, only I didn’t know what it was about. Finally, after what felt like forever, her voice pierced through my dark thoughts with perfect clarity.

“The reason I was sent to hell… My sin…”

“... was loving me,” I interrupted, anxious to get this over with. By now, I was already in pieces, fully prepared for the sight of her horrified face as she realized what she had done, what I had put her through.

Once again I closed my eyes, just so I wouldn’t have to see her leaving me.

Only, instead of the sound of her steps getting further and further away, I was overcome with the feeling of warmth as I was wrapped around a familiar embrace.

Y/N’s P.O.V.

I buried my face in his chest, appreciating the intimate scent of autumn, home and insanity that were ever-present in the man I loved. Guess now it made sense. I let his scent ground me, although, despite the circumstances, I didn’t feel all that confused. I had everything I needed right in my arms.

When I finally felt his arms around my body, reciprocating my embrace, I pushed my face away so I could stare up into his beautiful eyes. He looked so confused, his mouth a bit open, his eyebrows frowning. I could only smile patiently at him, my heart overflowing with emotion for the man I loved.

“Sebastian,” I called his attention to me, despite the fact that it was clear I already had it. “If loving you was my only sin, it was worth it to me.” I raised up on my tiptoes to kiss his red lips, and to my delight, he reciprocated the kiss with an untamed hunger that had to be the remnants of the fear he had been holding inside his mind.

We kissed deeply in the middle of his garden, his hands sprawled across my back making me feel safe and wanted and his. I didn’t care that I was in hell. If this was hell, I was glad I never had to leave.

But suddenly, he abruptly separated our faces, prompting a disappointed moan from my lips as he looked at me with wide eyes, struggling to catch his breath. “Wait. Do you… Do you really understand what I meant? You’re not here because I am an ordinary sinner, and loving me made you sin in consequence. You’re here because…”

“You’re the devil, right?” I interrupted, wanting to save him the effort of having to explain himself to me even further. “I understood, Seb. And I still don’t care. You’re still the one I love. The reasons I fell for you are still here, I can’t simply turn off a switch because I figured out you fell from heaven and are now in charge of dealing with sinners. Not even the fact that you hid this from me bothers me that much, after all, I would have never believed you if you had tried to explain yourself to me while I was alive. So please, let it go, believe me when I say that I still love you and always will and just kiss me already.”

He opened one of those huge smiles that were so rare on him, but managed to steal my breath away anytime they appeared on his handsome face, immediately leaning over me to do as I asked.

The kiss grew feverish quickly, and before I could even process what was happening, his hands had found their way over my butt and he was pulling me so I’d wrap my legs around him, which I did without even thinking. “Where are we going?” I managed to separate myself from him just enough to ask, and he growled, pulling me by the back of my head so our lips would touch again.

“I want to give you a tour of the place,” he whispered against my neck, where he decided to start kissing and sucking after I separated our lips because I needed to gather my breath again. “I figured we’d start in my bedroom.” It was impossible not to laugh at his silly ways.

“You know… I never expected the devil to be this horny,” I teased him, laughing from the way he scoffed, faking offense.

“I think you have the wrong impression of me, my darling… I simply want to begin by showing you the room that will be ours for the rest of eternity. Doesn’t that interest you?” I shook my head, pushing away from him just enough to look directly in his eyes.

“No, but you know what does?”

“What?”

“You. Especially when naked.”

Chuckling, his response came just before he pushed open the doors that I assumed would take us to our bedroom. “And you said I was the horny devil.”

#sebastian stan x reader #sebastian stan fluff #sebastian stan imagine #sebastian stan fanfiction #sebastian stan insert #sebastian stan insert fanfiction #sebastian stan x you #sebastian stan writing #my fics #fluff #sebastian stan

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strangertheory · 4 years ago

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A “perfect” ending?

Thank you for Asking, @strangerbylerss ! I was a Tumblr amateur once again, and I accidentally tried to save your Ask as a Draft and it disappeared. Thankfully, I’ve started taking screenshots of all Asks so I don’t lose track of them so I’m replying in a post like this.

What do I envision as a “perfect ending” that the public would say is not forced that involves Mike and Will falling in love and becoming a couple? Well. As you probably have noticed, I already see Mike and Will’s strong bond as canon and as an essential part of the very structure of the entire series. I personally believe that any other ending would feel forced and as though the writers had diverged from their original plans that they foreshadowed in seasons 1, 2, and 3. But! I respect that my opinion on that topic is controversial in the context of the popular fandom understanding of the series thus far, and I am happy to describe my thoughts on the direction that the series might take next, how that might involve Mike and Will’s relationship, and what I would personally like to see addressed in the story by the end of season 5.

It is, of course, important for the writers to explore Mike and Will’s relationship from this point forward in a way that continues to be consistent with the established Stranger Things universe and any canon details that we have been given so far in the first three seasons. I think Mike and Will have quite a lot of hurdles to get through, but that those hurdles are an intrinsic part of the story and that they will be addressed in the final seasons. Whether they face their challenges together earlier on, or whether those challenges need to be dealt with before they feel comfortable admitting their feelings for each other, remains to be seen. I have a hunch, however, that the mysterious events and odd happenings with the Mindflayer are directly connected to what Will is struggling with in the story, and as such it only makes sense that in the process of confronting the Mindflayer and conquering the personal issues that Will is dealing with that he will also inevitably confront his feelings for Mike.

I trust the Duffer Brothers and the writing team behind Stranger Things to continue telling a great story just as they have been thus far. Season 4 and 5 will undoubtedly feature more monsters and strange happenings around Hawkins, the Upside Down, and now wherever Hopper is (presumably Russia) and wherever the Byers Family has moved to. I am wary of hypothesizing too far into plot-related specifics since I think that's entirely dependent on the writers' creative decisions and something that could take many different paths, but I'm happy to share a very general idea of one route that I could envision the story taking that I think could be very satisfying.

Hints and clues in the series so far suggest that Will is dealing with a lot of trauma, and I believe that there is evidence that Will is also dealing with a significant amount of internalized homophobia. Canonically, the Mindflayer is implied to be connected to Will's emotional state in some way or at the very least heavily influences it. Will is pulled into the Upside Down in season 2 when he is afraid: first while trick-or-treating when startled by the bullies in masks, and again when at school and frightened by Dart in the bathroom. Will senses the Mindflayer in season 3 while watching Mike and El holding hands on the hill as they walk home, and he senses the Mindflayer while at the movies alone with Mike. I hypothesize that these season 3 moments in which Will senses the Mindflayer are specifically triggered by Will’s intense fear and anxiety over his repressed feelings for Mike. I believe that by the end of the series Will has to confront many of his fears in order to effectively deal with the Mindflayer, and his internalized homophobia is a significant source of fear and anxiety for him. I theorize that he will have to face his feelings for Mike eventually, and that it is actually a critical part of the logical resolution of the story.

Mike, meanwhile, has his own challenges. We are led to understand that Mike has a lot of deep insecurities and wants to be loved and accepted by other people, and also very much cares about doing the “right” thing. As rebellious as Mike can sometimes act, you can tell that he values the respect of his friends and he also might feel like he needs to live up to his strict and orderly parents’ expectations in order to be loved. I might be projecting a bit here, but while growing up in a household that was very strict and had lots of rules, I often felt like if I broke a rule or if I didn’t live up to my parents’ expectations that their love might actually be revealed to be entirely conditional someday.

For Mike and Will to end up together in a way that I would consider narratively consistent with the themes in Stranger Things so far, I believe that season 4 and season 5 need to address:

Will’s trauma

Will’s severe internalized homophobia

Mike’s insecurities and his desire for love and approval

their separation now that the Byers Family moved out of Hawkins

The perfect ending, for me, would involve Will finally starting to confront his trauma and any parts of his past that are haunting him in the present, and working through his internalized homophobia and the ghost of his father’s abuse. I would hope to see Mike recognizing that even if people don’t approve of what he wants to do with his life that he will ultimately be much happier when he is honest with himself and with others about his feelings and who he is regardless of what society expects. I think that Karen Wheeler will be particularly happy that her son is able to understand this in a way that she struggled to when she was younger.

If I were to predict the chronology of certain plot-points: I might guess that in season 4 we will follow Mike figuring out his feelings for Will while in Hawkins, and that Will would be working through his trauma and dealing with the Mindflayer with El and Joyce and Jonathan wherever they’ve relocated to. Will, in all likelihood, is probably still under the heartbreaking impression that Mike does not return his feelings, that being queer means that he will never have the chance to be happy like his friends, and that he is alone and unworthy of romantic love. We might see a rather angsty contrast between Mike realizing his feelings for Will while in Hawkins and becoming more passionately confident about it, while Will is off on his own facing horrible things and convinced that Mike will never return his feelings. (The drama!) At some point, the adventures in Hawkins will probably collide with the adventures with the Mindflayer once again, and the cast will be reunited through various twists of fate. When reunited, Mike might be prepared to confess his feelings for Will but plans could be thrown awry as sinister plots unfold and antagonists gain the upper hand in the season’s latest conflict. Since it is the penultimate season, I wouldn't be shocked if they leave us with a grittier cliffhanger than even season 3 and Hopper's (incorrectly) presumed death.

I think there’s any number of ways that the writers could address the main conflict in the series while also addressing the emotional conflicts of the story and offer us a very satisfying conclusion to both over the course of season 4 and season 5. I’ve given you a peek into one of many different hypothetical scenarios that I’ve imagined might take place and that could work, but I trust that whatever route the Duffer Brothers decide to take with the story that it will be excellent.

In conclusion: the perfect ending for Stranger Things, for me, would involve Hopper, Will, El, and Mike (and everyone else!) being safe and healthy and happy and confronting their fears, their traumas, and their feelings while being honest with their loved ones and themselves about what matters most to them. And I do think this will involve Mike falling in love with his friend that went missing in November 1983, and them living a very happy life together for the rest of their days.

Thank you for your Ask!

*Edit: I realize that I should briefly address Mike and El’s former dating relationship since oftentimes fans see their rom-com drama in season 3 as the largest hurdle between Mike and Will becoming a couple by the end of the series. I see Mike and El’s dynamic, and El and Will’s eerie connections to one another, as being an intrinsic part of the emotional journey of self-discovery and self-love that Mike and Will are going through. I believe that El and Will's stories are intertwined and that they are not entirely independent from each other. I won’t elaborate in this post, but you can read some of my thoughts on Will and El’s connection to each other here and you can read my opinion of Mike and El’s current dynamic here. In short: I don’t see Mike and El’s relationship as being in direct conflict with Mike and Will becoming a couple, I actually see Mike and El’s dynamics as frequently directly supporting the theory that Mike has feelings for Will. @kaypeace21 also has an excellent write-up on the way that El and Mike’s break-up in season 3 directly parallels Will and Mike’s fight, and the way that the tone of those scenes reveal Mike’s feelings. You can read that here.

#byler #stranger things theory #stranger things #stranger things 4 #will byers #mike wheeler #byler is real #byeler #byler is canon #stranger things analysis

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sambinnie · 3 years ago

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1. Happy Mabon! Every autumn, I forget that the darkness comes clanging down in a great rush in the mornings. One day, I am greeted by a pinking sunrise. 48 hours later, it’s so dark on my run to the river that I have to stop a passing runner and check the time, in case my disturbed sleep sent me dressing and leaving the house at 2am. This summer may not have given us those mornings where it’s so hot I can barely get out of the water, where those early hours feel like full silent days carved out just for me to sit in the light and wait for everyone else to wake up, where the only extra thing I put on to run home is my trainers — I look at my waiting winter gear, neoprene socks and gloves, head torch, two more thickening jumpers, hat, thermal mittens — but every season, every day, is beautiful.

Today we go early for celebrations, and the water is silky, and Orion hangs over us with his phallic sword dangling and Betelgeuse winking on one shoulder. The near-full moon spotlights us and I feel almost ready for the shortening days.

2. Hilary Mantel continues to be a literary god. How does she write with that clarity? How can I ever speak with her calm good sense and wit?

3. We have two main problems at the moment, as far as I can see. a) What we’re doing (“curating” our lives; twitter spats; purity spirals; division and isolation; wanting ‘debates’ that can only be won or lost; encouraging people to buy more things; trying to buy our happiness; letting marketers tell us how we feel about the world rather than encouraging major moral lessons from throughout the ages to challenge us on our weaknesses; refusing to accept that life is suffering; asking self-care to be a plaster for everything we don’t have) and b) what we’re not doing (joining together to stand against those with more money and power; protecting the people who have even less power and voice than we do as a matter of course; learning from history; protecting nature above all else; prioritising going for walks; learning to repair things and campaigning to make things repairable; having a basic belief in human dignity for all, not just those with whom we agree; accepting that truly, we are all different and no amount of shaming or disgust will change that; working to shape our societies, culture, economies, production, food supplies and communications around improving — not just sustaining — the air, water and land, and fighting to ensure all of those new shapes protect women and children).

Individualism has morphed into something so completely self-destructive that we’ve forgotten we need nature more than anything — literally, more than anything — and we need to unionise and unite and put aside differences and work together even with people we don’t like.

Because when there are wicked people in power, when it’s genuinely exhausting to think about all the corrupt, venal, toxic, divisive, false, and cruel things they have done since coming to power, those people love to watch everyone below pointing their fingers at one another, saying, You, You’re The Enemy, You’re The Problem, while corrupt populist leaders rub their bellies and chuckle at another promise broken, another mass death on their hands, another building site on a protected forest. Do you understand the stakes here? Do you understand that it’s actual survival? It’s not about being right any more, it’s not about besting someone in the argument. It’s about having decision makers who can not only ensure there is still food to eat and air to breathe, but that relations both within a country and between countries are built on care, and support, and compassion, and believing in human dignity. And while it sounds wishy-washy and hands-clappy it’s the schmaltzy, sentimental truth. It’s the only one, really.

If we instead continue to believe every single day that my feelings are the most important, that my beliefs are the right ones, that I’ve got to prove those baddies there are evil and awful and wrong, then honestly, what the fuck? If we’re happy to live in a country where hostile architecture is the starting point for all public builds, where we send refugee boats away from our shores, where affiliate links are a career goal, where we haven’t stormed the Daily Mail offices with accounts of all our lovely immigrant friends and family and had a huge feast together and compared our long and tangled family trees, then come on. It’s only a race to the bottom if we all keep running.

Because, pressingly, whatever the spark of a major global conflict — assassination, fuel shortages, hyperinflation, invasion — the kindling is almost always a populace fed pure hatred for months, for years, until they can’t even taste it anymore but are ready to spew it out again, and are ready to use another populace as the receptacle. And hatred is brewed up in silence and isolation, and in the ashes of bridges burned between disparate groups.

And on that note, I’m not a conspiracy theorist, mainly because I don’t believe governments are generally competent enough to manage Grand Plans, but it’s annoying that technology and social trends and culture have developed in such a way that no one knocks on anyone’s door for a chat as a matter of course now, that it’s a given that a ringing phone triggers anxiety, that it’s not the norm for cups of tea with your neighbours, that we don’t know each other’s neighbourhoods, that we don’t even talk on the phone, with live words and intonation and synchronised laughter, but in text, in WhatsApp chats, in tapped out words and symbols that we know can be screen-grabbed and misinterpreted, that we know are kept, filtered and sold by the tech companies. It’s not a conspiracy. It’s just a reality that every single one of us can choose to do differently.

Sometimes exactly the right thing comes along at the right time. All of us here watched About a Boy at the weekend, a film which is so wonkily weighted and oddly rhythmed, but a perfect depiction of everything I’m banging on about here. Hugh Grant’s character likes being alone. He’s happy that way. It suits him. It’s his choice. Then, between one thing and another, he finds himself drawn into a world of a suicidal single mother, a duck-murdering young boy, more single mothers, more tricky teens, plus exes and mothers-in-law and awkward support groups. And it turns out that actually, being with people is better. Being uncomfortable often develops you as a person. Constantly prioritising only yourself produces a waxen, pointless baby. Making shared sacrifices might just be the point of being alive. Remember that to be human is to be flawed. That no one is ever completely right, and no one is ever completely wrong. That the boring stuff makes us feel good, and the glossy stuff, if all we strive for is gloss, doesn’t.

If you want anything practical, here are the things that have really helped me over the last few years:

Writing a letter or email regularly to my MP, to CEOs of organisations, to anyone I want to communicate my strong feelings and how I’d like things to be done better. Tweeting eats your soul. It’s a horrible myth the media pretends is important. It really, really isn’t.

Inviting people to go in front of me in queues, in traffic, getting on to buses and trains. It lowers my stress levels right down.

Learning the names of my neighbours and people I meet regularly on walks and letting them learn mine. (I definitely haven’t just decided I loathe a neighbour because they cut a bird-hatching tree down in their garden on the last day of the year it was legal to do so. It’s fine.)

Joining a few political parties, and the closest thing I have to a union

Making something, anything — everything can be done with love, and learning to not get sucked into the capitalist conceit of having to make it perfect, sellable, exhibitable is a genuine gift to yourself; making a cake or a film or a coaster and not putting it on social media, letting it be ugly or serviceless and loving it anyway. I felt extremely overwhelmed the other evening, but instead of doom-scrolling I knitted a… I don’t know, something flat and woollen, and it helped to have my hands and eyes working on directionless introspective creation.

Trying to stop hating. Every time I want to tell a negative story in my head about someone, I attempt to turn it into something positive: how unhappy that person must be, what they must be missing out on. It’s so nauseatingly Pollyanna-ish, and of course it isn’t always successful, and of course every single day brings a hundred thousand examples of cruelty and injustice and wickedness, but the alternative only makes my life feel worse, so why would I indulge that?

Teaching myself the names of birds, trees, flowers, clouds and constellations. I’m still at the most basic levels on all of these, but the difference one feels in the world when you can name things — let alone use them and know their stories — is a very real sort of magic. (For that reason I hope to read this book very soon.) This episode of The Cut is also good on the wonder and power of learning the names of the weeds that grow in your nearest pavement crack.

4. Creating anything is always a gamble, isn’t it, but writing a book you actually like for once and seeing it slowly and beautifully sink to the bottom of a river never to be seen again is ever so slightly crushing. However, it turns out even Thom Yorke feels that way, so I am comforted.

5. I’m sure I’ve mentioned plenty of these before, but if you want some suggestions of where to find joy, here are my favourites from the last year or so:

I was given Lucy Easthope’s book, When the Dust Settles, for work recently, and I was surprised and delighted to discover the most uplifting, hopeful, human and rightfully angry book I’ve read in a long time. Do yourself a favour and preorder it. I bought this other book for my own birthday, gave it to a housemate to give to me, forgot about it, and was delighted to later unwrap He Used Thought As A Wife. Laughed a lot, cried twice. Marvellous.

Now even the youngest housemate here can recite John Finnemore sketches and sing the songs. Has also taught them various composers, gods, logical fallacies and gothic story tropes. Also v funny. Oh, Kate Beaton! Her two books (Hark! A Vagrant and Step Aside Pops) are a bit like a comic-book version of Finnemore, but swearier and sexier and utterly unsuitable for all the housemates who have read it and been educated about the Brontes, Katherine Sui Fun Cheung, Tom Longboat, Nancy Drew, Ida B. Wells, Sacagawea, and the Borgias.

Had to give Inside a restraining order against me for the sake of us all, but Bo Burnham’s Eighth Grade is a masterpiece of writing, acting, sound design and optimism. Spy is dumb action comedy polished to perfection, and Yasujirō Ozu’s Good Morning seems like the inspiration for almost all US arthouse films since 1990, and is also beautiful, funny, thoughtful, and good.

Taylor Swift’s Evermore, like all brilliant albums, isn’t completely perfect. But most of the songs are. And Hole’s classic Live Through This is still just ideal for turning up very, very loud after a tricky day, for the enjoyment of any neighbours who may have hacked down a bird-friendly tree on the last day of February.

Watched both series of Liam Williams’ Ladhood when I had a week off this summer, and really relished the location, the intention, and the writing. More please.

Miles Jupp and Justin Edwards continue to be my comforting bedtime listening in In and Out of the Kitchen. Has it ruined Nigel Slater for me? Well, a bit, but no more than any of us deserved.

I thought this would be a book I’d mumble through the first chapter of, then let get buried in my To Read pile, never to re-open. Instead, I found Whatever Happened to Margo? laugh-out-loud funny, drily written, and full of humanity. Excellent Women has made me want to read everything written by Barbara Pym, a goal I am slowly but surely working towards.

6. I’ve spent the last few years trying to find hazelnut trees, and finally found a copse between a car park and a play area, full of nuts the squirrels hadn’t noticed. Now I’ve found them, the spell has been cast and I see hazel trees everywhere, on walks and on pavements and running along motorway slip roads. A tray of green and brown frilled hazelnuts now dries with the laundry. They are so beautiful.

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pocket-void · 4 years ago

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Some questions about Marcus: What is his relationship with himself like? How does he feel about himself when he is alone with his thoughts? Is he comfortable with the person he is? And lastly: how does his perception of himself align with other people's perceptions of him? (and please dont be afraid to ramble, I love learning about Marcus, so go ham :D )

Well, permission to go ham received, so go ham I shall. o///o

You asked probably some of the most important questions because I’ve been trying to figure out a way to articulate this properly without confusing anyone for a long time. I’m sorry this reply is so late adjbdjbe, it was a messy mix of me forgetting, thinking too hard about it, and being too busy hhh. >///<

But that aside!! I think I finally have a good way to explain! So I’ll begin by saying this:

Marcus is a hypocrite.

He’s full of contradictions and is stuck in a self destructive loop that someone needs to help him get out of. He simultaneously thinks of himself as the most important person in the room while also still fully willing to sacrifice his life for someone else. He simultaneously knows that his existence is invaluable to the group while also believing that they are better off without them. He’ll tell you to take care of yourself better while he goes off and recklessly injures himself again. What he represents and embodies constantly clashes against how he feels and how he’s treated, and it’s slowly entangled him in a web of conflicting beliefs that’s kind of hard to describe, but I shall do the best I can. u///u

Marcus has a really warped perception of himself, though he probably doesn’t particularly realize that. Part of it comes from just sheer confidence and the lack of concern for how he’s perceived, the other comes from his, perhaps still unwilling, acceptance of where he stands in c!Thomas’ life. Of course a couple of key people also had a hand in how he turned out this way, but we’re focusing on just Marcus here.

If you really try to understand him, there are two sides to Marcus: Rational and Irrational. Which, if you think about it, kind of goes hand in hand with what he is.

His relationship with himself, to him, has always been solid. He knows what he’s doing. He knows that he’s important, just like any other side. He knows that he deserves better treatment than this, and is lowkey constantly fuming about it some way or another. The problem is that he isn’t aware of how he should be treated better. He’s just vaguely aware that something is wrong, and that feeling gets semi confused with the feeling that something about himself is wrong at times. It’s only compounded by the fact that everybody else seems to be totally ok with how things have been. (And doubly amplified by someone actually labeling him as wrong for a while! Ouch!)

He’s somebody who thinks of himself so highly that he doesn’t think most people around deserve to use his name due to spending his life being pushed to the side for so long. So long that it’s managed to somewhat convince even him deep down that he deserves it, perhaps somewhat subconsciously. It’s effectively telling someone something for so long that they eventually believe you. It’s been that long. So while he still holds himself to such a high regard that a lot of his history of being repressed comes back in the form of spite, there are parts of him that still quietly hold him down from actually fighting back.

On his own though he’s actually a rather tame person who just...wants to be seen as normal. He wants to be happy and have nice things too, but he apparently breaks stuff too often. Does that mean he shouldn’t have them though? He doesn’t know.

The short answer to the question “Is he comfortable with himself?” is no. He isn’t, he really isn’t, but it wasn’t always that way. He’ll say he is, because that’s not technically wrong either. Marcus at his core likes who he is and what he represents, what he doesn’t like is that he has the capacity to spiral out of control. And for the longest time he’s only been blaming himself for it happening. There have been certain incidents that kind of haunt him. The rational side of him knows his limits and that going too far is bad, but he physically can’t control himself when he becomes irrational and it bothers him a lot that he can’t. Deep down he’s afraid of that, because despite what people think Marcus himself doesn’t actually wanna go out of his way to hurt others. Things just get a bit heated when he gets pushed too far and he doesn’t have any mechanisms to resolve that because he’s never learned how to.

His inability to control his temper is actually rooted in the fact that he’s never been properly managed. What’s technically happening is that every time c!Thomas just forgets/ignores/avoids being angry, it negatively impacts Marcus. Because that anger goes somewhere, just not in any tangible or properly resolved way unlike say, Virgil’s anxiety. Suffice it to say it hasn’t done the lad any favors, and it’s caused many a problem that he still hasn’t quite recognized the cause of. He’s considered it just a problem that he’s stuck with, and he’s been silently driving himself up walls trying to fix it when the truth is he just doesn’t have all the tools to actually do so.

Does his perception of himself match up with others? Well that depends on what we’re talking about and who we’re talking to. Because on the surface, Marcus often acts like a joker who finds enjoyment in bothering the hell out of the other sides with his presence. Part of him is completely ok with that, since yeah, he doesn’t really care what they think at the end of the day if they’re already set in what they think of him (And yeah he’s kind of a bastard sometimes). The other part of him just decides to shut himself in Logan’s room and read all day because nobody wants to see him anyways so why waste his time. The main thing wrong with other people’s perceptions of him is that they think it’s something inherent within Marcus that causes him to lash out sometimes when it’s actually a lot more complicated than that. A lot more complicated than that, and someone desperately needs to step in for anything to get better unfortunately.

Marcus is a pretty smart guy, like...actually smart. (Well, as smart as you can be as a part of c!Thomas) The others kind of recognize that, but they also don’t trust him with taking the reigns on situations because he’s also pretty reckless. Which, also isn’t wrong. Marcus himself is aware of that too, which is why he steps down despite his complaints about it. It’s just sometimes maybe he steps back a bit too far and it kind of winds up biting him back later. The two people who vaguely know about Marcus’ deep seated issues are Logan and Patton, and one isn’t really sure about what to do and the other is frantically trying to mend a wound that they didn’t realize they caused ages ago.

I guess the main point is, despite Marcus’ presumed confidence in his abilities he’s actually really confused and would benefit a lot from at least some guidance. Currently he is getting nothing though, so you can probably imagine why he has so much internal turmoil and absolutely no where to direct it.

I hope this makes sense?? I spent way too long thinking about this and I’m a lil worried it’s confusing, but the truth is Marcus is just...really confusing. It’s a lot of unresolved feelings, and frankly it might make sense if I ever get to explaining the rest of his relationships. It’s just...a lot to think about.

But yeah! I hope this is ok for now. >///<

#marcus just needs help and has gotten none #so a lot of his problems come from that #but him and everyone else just kind of think it's a him problem #so he's been looking for answers in a place that doesn't exist #and that takes a toll on a person after a while >///<#fun fact Marcus' love languages are quality time and acts of service #that fact makes me a lil sad ngl #whisperinginthevoid #orange side #ask #sorry this answer was so late I legitamately just #had no idea if what I was saying made sense lmao #Marcus

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beneaththesoftcloud · 3 years ago

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I haven’t been on here much recently but I have a story I wanna share because maybe it would be helpful to someone? I don’t really know how to summarize; it’s mainly just my thoughts on an interaction I had and mental health.

I recently went with my mom to visit my grandma out of town and everything was going really well until there was a sudden conflict between me and my mom that sent me for 0 to 60 in less than a second and I snapped. Both of them converged on me and I was so upset and I knew that they were going to be mad at me and scold me and that they wouldn’t stop to listen to anything I had to say because that’s just what I’m used to. I’ve lived with my mom and her boyfriend since the end of 2019 for financial reasons and he doesn’t want me there so pretty much everything I do annoys him and causes conflict in the household. I have several sources of stress but that’s been hard to deal with because I can’t really do anything right in that situation. There’s no way to win (by “win,” I mean “find harmony”) if the only acceptable solution for the other party is “get out of my life asap.” But with the job market being what it is, covid, and the crazy housing prices in my city rising even higher, I live there because I have no other option. I know a lot of people are in the same boat as I am and I cope with my issues the best that I can but obviously the stress is always there and it fuels a lot of anxiety. Sometimes it comes to a head like it did when I was visiting my grandma, especially because my mom has this habit of poking people’s sore spots and then brushing off their reactions and it dirves me crazy.

But instead of coming at me from a disciplinary point of view like I was expecting (despite my age, despite the fact that I was able to live independently for several years before the shit hit the fan, this is the angle my family comes at me with because they see me as a child if I live under their roof), my grandma took an uncharacteristic step back. “This isn’t you, you aren’t an angry person like this, your bucket must be really full for you to be acting this way,” she said and she wrapped her arms around me and it made me realize how very long I’d gone without a hug or similar affection. Moreso, for her to stop and consider the reason why I might be acting so upset after such a short exchange rather than writing me off as a bad kid or trying to punish the reaction was mindblowing to me.

If I get upset, I usually handle it by mentally making a tally of all the tough shit I’m facing right now and I realize, oh, of course I’m stressed, there’s so much on my plate. I take the time to articulate it to myself, even if it’s something small: “No, it’s not the end of the world that mom’s boyfriend tracked grease all over the floor you just mopped. Yes, it feels disrespectful (and sexist) that he always makes messes that you are somehow expected to clean up. These particular footprints will only take a minute or two to clean up, but it makes me feel like he doesn’t value my time or effort. It feels frustrating to feel this lack of respect now when I’m the same person they used to look up to when I taught at a university. I don’t think my job or the dollar amount I bring home should determine the respect I recieve from my family but it seems to impact them a lot; than angers and stresses me.” I can handle emotions and keep them from negativiely impacting others without having to repress things or use the bad coping mechanisms from my childhood by thinking things out this way. But you can’t just think your way out of every problem. If you have a conflict with another person, you have to communicate with them or else there’s no way to fix it. This brings me back around to the main issue: he doesn’t want harmony, he wants to force me out. My mom feels he has more right to be in the house than I do, so she is also a communiticave dead end in this arena more often than not. Her response is to get upset at me for “not getting along.”

Hence, my proverbial bucket is full. It only takes a few drops and then I’m overflowing with all of the pain, indignance, rage, helplessness, etc. and the knowledge that I’m better than this situation I’m stuck in. I see the progress I’ve made toward my goals and I hold onto that to keep me sane. I think, yes, this is a terrible situation and I can’t manicure my emotions and behavior to perfection because that’s impossible, but I want to be the person I want me to be and I’ll try and handle each given situation as that person I want to be. I’m not used to recieving any sympathy for my situation. When my grandma started dishing sympathy out despite my flawed behavior, I didn’t really know what to do. I sort of deflated and tears were falling before I really registered what was going on.

“Here,” she said and she stood right by my side and took my hand, “When you stand like this and you hold someone’s hand, it feels like you’re facing the problem together. If you stand like this,” she moved in front of me and crossed her arms, “this is confrontational. Even sitting across from one another it’s too easy to pit each other against yourselves. But when you’re side by side,” she moved again to my side and took my hand, “you can work things out like this.” She started interviewing me more or less and she didn’t critique anything I felt. She validated my personal struggle, the struggle of my generation, the effort I expend, the disposition I maintain. She didn’t crtique my mom to do any of this and my mom didn’t really jump in for good or bad, she just sort of sat and watched it unfold. There wasn’t really any news; she knew what my problems were and knew it gave me a lot of stress. But she didn’t leave the room, sje sat and listened. And since that trip, she’s tried to initiate a positive interaction with me almost every day over the past week.

And I guess a few things have been hanging around with me. My brother once said to me that you have different people in your life for different reasons when my mom asked him if it was an issue for him that his (kind, sweet) girlfriend has no sense of humor. He said he has me for that, he has friends for that, too, she doesn’t have to be everything for him to love her. Between that interaction and last weekend and just various other things, I just feel that I’ve been given this push along the last few years to allow more people into my life so that I can have different people for different reasons. I’ve always been so isolated and felt I have to do everything on my own. I do think it’s important to have a sense of responsibility for myself, but I think a lot of people feel very pressured to put on thier best face for everyone and only confide in maybe one or two people. If they share things with anyone else, it’s under the pretense of superficial conversation or the guise of a trendy topic. I know I personally tend to avoid sharing vulnerability too openly, too much openess makes it impossible to function day to day. But I also have been very closed off to the point that it doesn’t occur to me to confide even to relatively close family members.

I think there’s so much talk about how self-reliance is the only important thing for happiness in our society that we don’t even realize how prevelant the message is (you don’t need a significant other to be happy, you just need self love! It doesn’t matter if you come from an abusive family, all you need to do to recover is believe in your own strength). And I think there’s comfort in that message when it’s directly opposed from a “family is everything/ blood is most important/ you’re nothing without your roots” type of a message because so many people do have such difficult family situations and it’s important to know your worth outside of that context. But I think, at least for me, I do need affection from people to feel better. Just little bits in different ways from different people, but it can’t all come from myself and have the same healing effect. The same goes for validation, attention, understanding, play, exchange of ideas, etc. And it’s important to have more than one person because otherwise it becomes easy to fall into the trap of expecting too much from one person or causing someone to feel pressured to always ease your mind, and that’s no good.

I’m not really sure where I’m going with all of this but I guess I just feel better. My situation hasn’t changed, it still needs to change before I can really get to a truly healthy and relaxed state, but I feel massively better and I feel like I know how to continue on that path. Forming new relationships is so different in your late twenties than in your late teens and it feels like a weird landscape to navigate, but it’s like a wall that was seperating me from it all has come down. And I feel free instead of naked without that wall.

#i realize this is essitially a kpop blog hello #it's my preferred form of escapism because frankly #you can't be upset 24/7 you have to have something that makes you smile #i just feel like i'm finding balance in my life #like i think you always need something away from your circumstances to focus on #just because it gives you a break #but i feel like i've been having a lot of revelations that have been coming together #just about the most basic human interaction type stuff #but i'm going from knowing these basic things #to actually understanding them and how they fit into my life #and it feels like things are coming together #anyways what my grandma said is right #if you sit side by side with someone and hold their hand it's easier to reconcile #if there's any desire for harmony #that desire rises to the absolute surface and everything else is below #i

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defeatedbyamerechild · 4 years ago

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Do you have an opinion on what kind of parents would the canonically childless villains be?

Ooooh yes!!! I have a few ideas! ^^

Archie: “Kid” Dad!

Archie would be that kind of dad that kids absolutely adore, but teenagers cringe at. He is the super friendly and funny dad who is always playing with the kids and making jokes and trying to be friends with their friends, which usually is very cool when the child is small but becomes a bit cringy later on. Archie is very childish in my headcanon, so he might face difficulties when watching his child grow up and become, well... more mature than him, most likely! XD He’d be a good dad, though. Very loving and understanding. Also, he’s pretty good at understanding people’s feelings, so after a few cringy moments with his kid, he’d understand what makes them embarrassed and what doesn’t, and he’d do his best to avoid it. At the same time he would be kinda cringy to his teenager, he would also be the first one to understand what the problem is as soon as something started bothering them. But he’s not the best dad at serious conversations, he’d rather leave those to Maxie, but give emotional support in every way he could.

Maxie: “Mom” Dad!

You know how there’s this “mother archetype” that the mom is more emotional, more responsible but also more soft. Gets angry a bit more easily, but also forgives more easily... Gets worried about their kids more often... You know the drill. We know not every mother is like that, of course, just like some dads are just like this. Maxie is one of them, My Maxie has many traits that might be described by old-fashioned people as “feminine” (not that it’s got anything to do with gender or biological sex, but you know how archetypes go). Also, Maxie loves cooking and does it very well, which also is present on the mother archetype. Maxie is overall more resposible than Archie, and a bit more strict, but not much. He is very understanding, but not that good at reading emotions, and sometimes lets his own fears and wrong impressions blur his understanding of how his child feels, making him over-think very often. He is also more desperate than Archie, because of his anxiety, so... He’ll be the first one to freak out once the teenager doesn’t show up before eleven like they said they would. Then it would be Archie who would assume the Responsible Role to calm him down and try to keep everything under control. Both would be good dads.

Cyrus: Righteous Dad!

Cyrus has had it rough as a child, and I definitely think he wouldn’t want to repeat his parents’ mistakes when raising his own kid. I feel like he would be rather strict, specially since he is very organized, literal and practical by nature, so he would have his rules and schedules that he would like his child to follow... But he would definitely be more understanding about them not following it than his parents were with him, and wouldn’t go for severe punishments, but for conversations instead. Also, I headcanon that the way children think is kinda fascinating to Cyrus, because he is such a literal person with such a practical mind... So I think his best quality as a dad would be that he LISTENS to children. Cyrus doesn’t see children as inferior or less complex, and he admires the way they interpret the world. He would listen and try to understand their logic. Explaining why something is a problem and coming up together with a solution would be his main strategy to deal with issues. If the problem persisted, he might resort to grounding, but grounding would always make sense, like “you didn’t clean your room, so you can’t go play now. You can go play after cleaning it, though.” instead of “You didn’t clean your room so you’re not getting that videogame you want” or another punishment that doesn’t have a logical connection between the problem and the consequence. However, Cyrus wouldn’t be the best with the emotional part, naturally. He has trouble expressing and reading feelings. That wouldn’t be a super huge problem because of how open for communication he would be, so his child could just go and say “you screwed up and I’m upset because of this” and he’d accept that argument and discuss it. Terrible at emotional advice, things might get complicated during teenagehood when emotional bursts showed up, because he’d go “I understand you are feeling like this because of hormones” and the teen would be like, crying his lungs off and yelling “SCREW HORMONES” and Cyrus would be like “what do I do”. Overall: one of the best dads for small kids, but would need help with teens.

Lysandre: Disaster Dad!

I just hope Lysandre never has a kid honestly.

I mean, seriously now. Lysandre in my comics would be a disaster, because he’s not... well... he is not psychologically and emotionally balanced. So I literally think he wouldn’t be able to raise a child, the kid would end up super spoiled and with zero boundaries regarding emotional expression. It would be that kid that thinks their feelings are more important than anyone elses, and every time they have a mild issue Lysandre would just go and say that “but my kid is right!” even if like... his kid had just punched another child out of the sudden. the kid would no know limits... At the same time, growing up with Lysandre would be confusing because on one second he is super happy and on the next one he’s crying, and the kid wouldn’t know what to expect from him... So yeah, teenagehood would get even harder than usual, they’d both spend half their lives crying and I honestly think there’s a huge chance the kid would run away from home eventually. Just a big nope. Horrible dad.

Outside of my comics, thinking about a more sane Lysandre... Hmm... I think he might be a decent dad. But I’m still pretty sure he would spoil the heck out of his kids. To be honest I don’t see Lysie being a father in my headcanons.

Guzma: Cool (disaster) Dad!

Guzma is the cool dad. The dad that acts very immature for his age, and that kids like, but teens LOVE. However, he’d be so irresponsible... I feel like Guzma would be that kind of dad who’s like “where the heck is that kid though?” like... his 5yo child just got out of their house and went away half an hour ago while he wasn’t looking and now he has no clue where the kid is. So yeah, that kid would grow up with a lot of friendly respect towards Guzma, but absolutely no sense of hierarchy. The kid would have lots of trouble in school and Guzma would barely care about that. He’d just go like “come on, kid, do your homework”, the kid wouldn’t do it and he’d be like “meh”. He would be more of a disaster with a small child, because the kid would definitely miss the sense of protection and guidance that having an adult around gives you at that age, and as I said, the kid might literally walk away and get lost... Also Guzma wouldn’t even cook for the kid, like... “dad I’m hungry” - “aw man, let’s see if we have some snacks”. If the kid survived his young years, then it would be better during teenagehood, I suppose. Guzma would give them lots of privacy, get along with their friends, be chill about their choices... But I can definitely see some emotional conflicts happening in the future because “you never even cared about me” or “I have always done everything on my own anyway!” or something similar, since the child might feel like Guzma did not give them the necessary amount of attention and protection when small. And man, if Guzma ever wanted that kid to do something, he would not be able to convince them at all. That kid would just straight up not obey him. Overall? Not the best dad, but might work with the right significant other to complement his flaws.

Rose: Confused Dad!

You know that dad who forgets what you told him yesterday? Who cannot remember your friends’ names? Who might literally pick the wrong stroller at the suppermarket and take the wrong baby home? That’s Rose. That aside, he is the standard dad, like... bad with cooking, tries his best with barbecues, but is not too great with it, wears tacky clothes, makes unfunny jokes, chills in the couch on sundays... Extreme dad energy, just a bit more chaotic because of his forgetful mind. He would be a good dad, I believe, but he would need someone to help him organize his thoughts. So like... “We’ll talk about this later” would easily become completely forgotten (like with Bede in my headcanon). Punishments are often confusing and disproportional (either too severe for what happened or too mild, because Rose does before he thinks), and he’d be the first one to forget about the grounding. So like “You didn’t clean your room? That’s it, you cannot go out with your friends for two months!”, but like... two days later his kid asks to go out and he’s like “Okay! come back before it gets dark!” because he already forgot. So he would need some other person like “Rose, two months just because of a room is too much...” and “Rose, you had grounded them, remember?” always helping him keep track of what’s going on. He would also be so easy to fool for a teen, like... “Don’t worry, he already forgot about that rule...” or “Relax, he won’t even notice his wallet is gone”. Still, for being a very nice guy to his kid all his life, I have a feeling that the child wouldn’t feel like fooling him so often, and would feel bad for disappointing him if they did. I feel like he would have many problems as a single dad, but would be OK with the right SO to help him. Still would be better than Guzma as a single dad, though. Kinda the same with kids or teens, an OK dad.

Piers: Overprotective Dad!

Piers would be the kind of dad that freaks out because their kid didn’t anwer their phone, but like... while their kid is in the front yeard, you know? Also the kind of dad that just wants to know what’s happening all the time, but at the same time doesn’t wanna be too annoying, like... He’d be like “I just... why didn’t they say anything when they arrived from school? Are they mad? Are they sick? Are they sad? Is someone hurting them? Why don’t they tell me? Do’t they trust me? Did I hurt them??” just because his kid didn’t say “hi” very loud today, but he would keep that to himself. He’d keep thinking about that, and talking about that to his friends, but not to the kid. He’d sometimes say something like “is there anything wrong?” but would try not to insist too much. If the kid ever did something wrong or if he found out they were hiding something, he would argue with them and show them that he’s disappointed, but as soon as they left to their room he would collapse like “I’m a horrible dad I’m a failure this is all my fault”. Not true, though, Piers is very responsible and loving, I’m pretty convinced he’d be an awesome dad, just a bit too overprotective. He would be constantly fighting between the urge to keep an eye on his child in order to protect them from any harm and the conscience that he needs to give their kid space and privacy. He’d probably be one of the best dads but think he’s the absolute worst. Still, Piers has some... issues with authority? So like, if his kid did something wrong and got in trouble, he’d be chill. He’d acknowledge the problem and talk to his kid... BUT if his kid got in trouble for what he sees as an unfair reason... Man, Piers would kill to defend them, so yeah. He might argue with the school, the teachers, the other kids, the other parents, cause trouble and so on... He’s the kind of dad that might go and punch bullies himself then get in trouble for that. And he would not teach his kid that “sometimes we have to accept injustice because of hierarchy”, so yeah. Depending on the child, that might become a problem. Still, I think he’d be a good dad.

Yeah, I think that’s about it. I always write more when it comes to Cyrus, because he’s my favorite, but in the end I think I wrote a decent amount about everyone! XD

I think they’d all be decent or good dads, except for Guzma (that would only be good with the right SO) and Lysandre (that would just not work no matter who his SO was).

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inkprintedfox · 4 years ago

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OC Study

Tagged by @advena87 to fill out -THIS- OC question prompt.

I tag @starsandskies @1orweth @kanawolf

This is time consuming so I can understand if you guys don't want to do it, so no pressure. I spent roughly a week and a half, almost two weeks on this? No regrets, mostly took so long for me because I work full time and I tend to space out a lot and ramble. Lol

It is quite a bit of fun and a good exercise to help develop your characters so I do recommend It! Don't recommend doing more than three OCs at a time though, three was hard for me and usually I'm an over-achiever. Go easy and dont burn yourself out! Also would be a good exercise if you're writing with a canon character and want to get a handle on working with them.

I wanted to answer this in character originally but it would have been twice as long and probably taken me a month or more. 😅 Perhaps I'll do something like that one day....

Dragon Age OCs per usual for me.

Warden-Commander and Hero of Fereldan (DAO & DAOA)

Growing up in the Denerim Alienage has made Feiell a very bitter, angry, and agressive person. Biting and scrabbling to survive she also had to fight to keep her family and neighbors safe from the rich humans that liked to exploit the destitute elves. She gained a reputation as a protector but also a very hard woman.

She redibly accepted her conscription into the Grey Wardens, not only to escape the persecution of the law, but also to escape the narrow world of the Alianage. Collecting the people that would later be affectionately called "The Blight Brigade" exposed her to many new adventures as well as lifelong friendships, love, and personal growth that could not have happened otherwise.

The Champion of Kirkwall (DA2)

Laid-back, vain, and honestly somewhat lazy, Aiden has never wanted to be anyone's savior let alone a whole city's. Family has been the only thing that mattered in his life and after his father's death, he naturally took on the role of protector and main provider for his mother and siblings. This also made it very natural to take in the stray band of misfits that became almost like family and also why it is so natural for Aiden to constantly help people, even at times he would rather not.

His bleeding heart drags Aiden into the center of conflict far more often than he likes and he constantly berates himself for it. This automatic altruism has jaded him which fuels his sarcastic and sometimes bitter, self-deprecating humor. A tad over dramatic at times means that while he rarely, it ever, says no to aiding someone in need, it certainly doesn't mean he has to be quiet about it either.

The Inqusitor (DAI)

Max has been fortunate for most of his life, from growing up in the wealthy Trevelyan family, to his good looks and, quiet frankly, fantastic smile it's easy to assume he'd be another spoiled rich brat. You'd be giving in to a stereotype that doesn't, quiet, fit him though. From a young age Max has always been outgoing and adventurous which made him a handful to raise. His father frequently grappled with finding things to keep his youngest son occupied in ways that he hadn't had to do with his previous three children.

Born with a naturally sharp mind and quick wit, Max picks up new concepts quickly and with ease. Which means he often grew board with tutors, burned through the family library in a handful of years, quickly became very competent on horseback as well as the breeding and rearing of them (part of the family business), and often terrorized his siblings as well as the hired staff. Once he exhausted most of the interesting things at home he started running off to search for new adventures. Boredom and frequent arguments with his father often lead to habitual bouts of running away from home. Hence where Max got to truly learn about the world and open his eyes to the kind of privilege he's been so lucky to be born with. Unfortunately this also has ingrained his habit of running away from problems he doesn't see a forward solution to. (*cough*theinqusiton*cough*)

OC Study

Featuring:

Warden-Commander Feiell “Fe" Tabris

Champion of Kirkwall Aiden Hawke

Inquisitor Maxwell “Max" Trevelyan

1. Is your OC easily bothered by things?

Feiell – Small things don’t really bother her but she is a tad hot-headed so if you give her a hard time you might not be in for the best experience. She also has zero tolerance for idiots or assholes.

Aiden – He’s a petty bitch that mostly whines and complains to annoy his friends. Also whining about petty things is a good cover for the bigger worries and anxieties he hides underneath.

Max – Mostly an easygoing, carefree type. It takes the numerous responsibilities of the Inquisition weighing down on him all at once before he starts cracking.

2. How easily does your OC make friends?

Feiell – Most defiantly not a people person. Her natural stoic demure and biting sarcasm keeps people at bay. You have to spend quite a bit of time around her before she warms up to you.

Aiden – For reasons he doesn’t really understand people like Aiden. It’s probably his easy smile and sense of humor which he uses to get what he wants or needs out of them. Not really manipulative just doesn’t feel like he deserves the attention. The humor mostly hides his pain and keeps people at arms length, mostly unintentionally. He hates to burden those he loves.

Max – Max loves people, mostly entertaining, or teasing them. His signature charming smile and good looks usually put people at ease which makes him very likable. It also lets him get away with the mischief he often gets into.

3. Does your OC go beyond what they have to do or do they usually do just enough work to get by?

Feiell – Has almost literally killed herself to get where she is. Her work ethic is legendary and she’ll do almost anything to support her family and friends.

Aiden – Will do the barest minimum to get by. Her lazy as hell, even though he is incapable of saying no when someone needs help.

Max – Believes in doing things right the first time and if not the first time then defiantly the second time. Whatever the job needs to get done he willing to do and if it’s a favorite project he can lose himself in it indefinitely.

4. Is your OC respectful of others?

Feiell – She will be as respectful to you as you are to her, but will out match you if you’re a dick to her or her friends.

Aiden – Respectful enough to not cause trouble and get people to leave him alone.

Max – Perfect manners, and ridiculously charming. He believes everyone deserves respect unless they prove otherwise.

5. Is your OC imaginative or more down-to-earth?

Feiell – Defiantly no-nonsense and down-to-earth. She believes in hard work to active your goals.

Aiden – More of a day-dreamer but pulls a practical side together to care for and help family and friends. Dreams are nice but plans put food on the table.

Max – Total idealist, truly believes even the most impossible is attainable if you work at it long enough. Most of that idealistic optimism is broken after Trespasser, but that’s a long story.

6. Is your OC comfortable with themselves?

Feiell – She’s always been comfortable with who she is and has never felt any shame for it. She owes that to her parents and cousin.

Aiden – Feels like a constant failure and a burden despite how hard he tries not to. Doesn’t feel comfortable with opening up about his feelings and weighing others down with them. Is also terrible with expressing more painful emotions.

Max – Is mostly comfortable with himself. Always felt like a disappointment to his family because he never had the kind of goals for his life he thought they would want from him. Also never really saw himself as reliable but the Inquisition changed all that.

7. Does your OC plan things and stick to it or do they make it up as their go?

Feiell – Always has a plan and is a master of adjusting things on the fly if needed. Prefers to stick to the plan but has accepted how rarely that can happen.

Aiden – He’s been winging his whole life and it somehow hasn’t killed him yet.

Max – Usually has more of an outline than a hard plan. Trial & error are his best friends and somehow he’s still alive, that’s probably because he uses educated guesses more that throwing things to the wind.

8. Was their life eventful before the start of the story, or was it more dull?

Feiell – Depends if living in poverty and oppression is dull to you. I guess since it was normal for her it was boring.

Aiden – The stress of hiding a mage father and sister was more than Aiden ever wanted. He would have preferred boring.

Max – While the constant mischief Max got himself into means things were never dull they certainly seem boring when compared to life in the Inquisition. Josephine certainly had her hands full going through all of Max’s past exploits.

9. Do they have the habit to insult other people?

Feiell – Is a salty, little bitch so defiantly yes. She has a sharp tongue.

Aiden – Bit of a smart-ass and occasionally he can’t help it so it gets him in trouble.

Max – Mostly no, it takes quite a bit to get on his nerves enough to make him snap at you. Usually very polite.

10. Would your OC be described as “the life of the party”?

Feiell – She can be described as the death of the party.

Aiden – Likes to think he is.

Max – Is the actual life of the party if he wants to be. Usually he is.

11. Are they critical of others?

Feiell – To a degree, yes

Aiden - Mostly critical of himself

Max – Not really, he’s pretty non-judgmental

12. Do they like art? what is their favorite type (paintings, songs, fashion, etc)?

Feiell – The art of war perhaps, but music is good too.

Aiden – He considers Fenris a work of art if that counts.

Max – Paintings, music, nature, pretty clothes (mostly on Dorian), Max loves it all. He was especially fond of watching Solar paint his murals.

13. Are they more accepting or more controlling of the people in their life?

Feiell – As long as you’re not bothering her and no one gets hurt she doesn’t really care what people do.

Aiden – He has no control over his own life let alone any one else.

Max – Very accepting of people but not above a subtle nudge to do things he feels might benefit them.

14. Is your OC a good listener?

Feiell – She listens more than she talks, so yes.

Aiden – The one who’s always there to listen when you need him.

Max - Yes, he also has a great memory so he's very good at keeping track of all the drama in life. Lol

15. Are they opinionated or more willing to change their minds?

Feiell – Pretty opinionated but not impossible to change her mind, not that it is easy to do so mind you.

Aiden – Too changeable at times and mostly keeps his opinions to himself.

Max – A few solid moral opinions that he won’t move on but open-minded on nearly everything else.

16. Are they the kind of person who’s always on the defensive?

Feiell – Much less than she use to be but definitely yes.

Aiden – Only when he feels blamed for everything, which he is often.

Max – No, he dose his best to own up to his mistakes and rarely takes things personally.

17. Do people like hanging around them? do they have a positive, friendly energy?

Feiell – I will file this under HELL NO. She scares the crap out of most people if she doesn’t piss them off. It can take quite awhile for friends to warm up to her, if at all.

Aiden – People love Aiden, but the older he gets the less Aiden likes people. They demand too much from him but he’ll never be able to say no, or miss a chance at a passive-aggressive joke. Or a regular bad joke for that matter.

Max – People love Max almost from the moment they meet him. There is just something about him that puts everyone at ease and makes it easier to trust and smile. Must be the charming smile, yeah, has to be. He’s not bad looking either.

18. Is your OC a procrastinator? if they are, what’s an example of how much?

Feiell – People die if she puts things off, so no. Some days she wishes she could put many things off though. Like dying anytime soon, there’s too much to accomplish.

Aiden – What is productivity? If nobody is dying or it’s not dragging him, kicking and screaming, by the hair then its probably not getting done. At least no time soon. Guilt trip him hard to speed things up.

Max – Important things get done but if it’s not a pressing issue then it often can be temporarily abandoned for more enjoyable activities. Even if it’s set aside, the thing will still be done in a reasonable amount of time. Unless he forgets, which can happen frequently.

19. Do they tend to panic in certain situations or are they more calm?

Feiell – Always calm, if something bothers her you’ll never know.

Aiden – Panics constantly. Somewhat hides it well…somewhat…

Max – Takes most things in stride, the sudden dump of responsibility and people’s lives was really stressful but he adjusted to it.

20. Are they vengeful?

Feiell – I literally made a post of her being a deity of vengeance lol.

Aiden – Petty or bitter, perhaps, but not full on vengeful.

Max – Yes, touch the people he loves and see a whole different side of him.

21. What are some skills your OC has a talent for and what are some that they worked for?

Feiell – She’s has a natural flair for swordsmanship, her mother started training her and Fe kept up the practice even after her mother’s passing. Her leadership skills were…a little more rough. She had to learn how to organize and lead people on the fly because of the Blight but luckily she learns quickly.

Aiden – He’s scary good at lying, not even Varric can catch him in one. (Honestly most of his book is just Varric's best guess on Aiden's thoughts) Knife throwing took quite a bit of practice though. He can now nail someone at 100 pages and is unmatched at darts.

Max – Politics and navigating the Great Game are weirdly natural for Max even though he kinda hates it. His archery skill is something he is extremely proud of because he’s practiced relentlessly to be as good as he is. And he really is good, until a natural like Sera comes and shatters his ego. Lol

22. Are they more socially awkward or socially confident?

Feiell – Awkward, but in the way that she doesn’t care what people do or say. She dose her own thing and ignores everyone else.

Aiden – Smooth on the outside, tired wreak on the inside. Not that anyone will ever know.

Max – Social chameleon, and life of the party. Until he slips away unnoticed somehow.

23. What is something really dumb that irritates your OC a lot?

Feiell – Dumb questions about her hair: “How long is it?”, “Why do you keep it that long?”, “Is it really that red?”. Usually answered with “Why do you care so much, it’s not your hair.” Also people touching her constantly, she doesn’t see the need to constantly clap people on the shoulder or grab their arms when somethings funny.

Aiden – Orlesians, if you don’t know anything about DA then I’m sorry, this probably doesn’t make sense to you.

Max – Assuming he's stupid or that because of his wealth that he doesn't do any work. He's a natural busy-body so assuming he sits on his are all day is really irritating.

24. Do they tend to see the good in people?

Feiell – No, she’s had too many bad experiences before so distrust is her default until proven otherwise.

Aiden – Sometimes, mostly sees people in shades of grey. No one is 100% good or bad.

Max – He sees the good in people as often as he can and tries to pull some good out of those who are sometimes a little lost.

25. What does it take for your OC to trust someone?

Feiell – Doing what you say you will, not hiding things, sticking up for others when it clearly has no benefit for you, and give it a few weeks….or months and she may trust you.

Aiden – Help him out in a hard spot, or help family/friends.

Max – If you’re not openly malicious or he doesn’t feel like you’re lying/hiding anything his default if to trust until proven otherwise.

26. Do they have a lot of mood swings?

Feiell – Not really, she’s not a very emotional person. Unless you count her temper which can light like a matchstick.

Aiden - Known to be moody, to the point of it being a well known joke among friends. On bad days he can even out do Anders.

Max – Only if the stress is overwhelming him or he’s pretty sick. Otherwise he’s pretty even tempered.

27. Do they like to be the center of attention or do they prefer to be in the background?

Feiell – Hates being the center of attention and would rather be left alone. Unfortunately she’s had to get use to the attention after becoming Warden-Commander.

Aiden – If people could forget who he is it would be really nice. Likes being the center of attention among friends and family, doesn’t like it with crowds of strangers.

Max – Loves entertaining people and making them laugh which makes him great for parties. He grew up attending big gatherings and is an expert at navigating them, which means he's also very good at slipping away from them when he tires of the crowds.

28. Do people think they’re pretentious?

Feiell – Sometimes, her natural expression can give that impression but most of those people that make this mistake are racist shems that don’t like the power she has. Or the fact that she could kill them without breaking a sweat.

Aiden – No, his face is too friendly and if that doesn’t do it the self-deprecating jokes do.

Max – Yes, it’s easy for people to assume that since he comes from money. He’s never thought himself better than anyone though and tries to dispel that impression, but you can’t control what people want to think of you.

29. Is your OC detail oriented or do they focus more on the big picture?

Feiell – Details, details, you add them all up and that’s how you get a bigger picture. Other words, very detail oriented.

Aiden – Big picture. How you get there is a mystery though.

Max – Big picture first then an outline of the main details to get there.

30. Which high school movie stereotype would they fit best?

Feiell – The ice queen/The strict, scary teacher.

Aiden – Class clown/Troublemaker/Weird but laid back teacher

Max – The jock that befriends the weird kid/Hot science teacher

31. Are they good giving advice?

Feiell – Defiantly not, she’s better at giving orders.

Aiden – Only ask if you want to get in trouble. Ok, that’s not completely true, occasionally he can give good advice. Particularly to help cheer someone up.

Max – I would say yes, he’s gotten quite a bit of good advice over the years and likes to pass it on.

32. Which one of the 7 deadly sins fit your OC more? do they see it as a flaw?

Feiell – Wrath: Only a flaw if you think beating your enemies is a bad thing.

Aiden - Sloth: Regrets this flaw. If he had acted sooner on many things they might not have escalated the way they did.

Max – Pride: A flaw he has worked hard to temper over the years. Was more of a problem when he was younger than now.

33. Is your OC more likely to keep their feelings to themselves or to share them?

Feiell – Keeps them mostly to herself. A couple close friends may get a glimpse but only Zevran knows her well. He’s learned when to prod to get her to open up.

Aiden – Doesn’t like to burden others so keeps his feelings to himself even when he shouldn’t.

Max – His oldest sister is his best friend and confidant, she gets to hear everything. Max has started to lean on Dorian in this way too. Basically immediate family and good friends will know what’s up.

#tag game #oc study #my ocs #oc asks #maxwell trevelyan #aiden hawke #feiell tabris #My OC: Feiell Tabris #My OC: Aiden Hawke #My OC: Maxwell Trevelyan

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memaha19 · 5 years ago

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Okay, I have a lot of (mostly positive) thoughts about Frozen II and I need to get them out...

Spoilers abound, obviously. This post is giant so it’s all below the cut.

I hope this makes any sort of sense, it took me like four hours to write and I’m afraid it’s just all my rambling thoughts.

Hi. Okay. I’ve seen Frozen II twice now (with plans to go see it again) but I have a lot of thoughts about it and the story and the characters and everything that have been warring inside my brain for the last three days and I just need to express them.

Tiny backstory, for those who weren’t following me six years ago: the first Frozen was/is everything to me. It was a phenomenon to the world, but also a personal phenomenon for me. And even when everyone got sick to death of hearing Let It Go, I’ve never given up on my love for it. I have pretty bad anxiety. Some days are hard. So to see a character like me in a Disney movie was amazing. To see Elsa struggle with herself and her fear and her anxiety was eye-opening and I immediately fell in love with her character and what she represented. I’m not Disney’s “target audience”. I was 21 when the first movie came out (the same age as Elsa, so I felt like I could relate even more) and I’m 27 now. But I was in love with Frozen all the same.

So. Frozen II.

There are a lot of things I love about it. I debated before writing this about whether I should start with with my favorites, things I didn’t like, or just a general review? I guess I’ll start by saying: all of the things I disliked about it weren’t really even things I disliked, just things that I think could’ve been served better by a movie that had more time to devote to these things.

The Big Problem

This movie could’ve done with being about 20-25 minutes longer. That is my biggest complaint that ties into all my other complaints. I wanted more from some of the plots and the themes. Frozen II wanted to do way more than the time it really had to do all of these things. It wanted to deal with their parents past, Arendelle’s past, the sisters relationship post-Frozen, the romantic subplot between Anna and Kristoff, Elsa’s quest to follow the voice and find herself, the Northuldra, the mythology behind the Enchanted Forest, and a bunch of other tiny little things. It did not have the runtime for all of this and so while some of it was done incredibly well (i.e. Elsa and the whole “Show Yourself” sequence), some things felt introduced and then almost immediately abandoned. Other things felt like they were introduced and explored a teeny tiny bit and then given to us later as the reason why a character makes a choice to do something.

My biggest issue relates to our beloved, beautiful snow queen, Elsa, and her story. The catalyst for the film is Elsa’s desire and need to be something more, to do something else with her life. It’s this desire of hers that leads her to “Into the Unknown”, which ends with her waking up the spirits of the Enchanted Forest, endangering Arendelle and kicking off the journey that makes up the body of the film.

My issue with this isn’t that I don’t believe that Elsa could be having these “I don’t belong here, need to go somewhere else” thoughts. It’s been three years since the first movie took place, three years of her being queen and maybe deciding that, although she has the love of her sister and a family supporting her, there’s still somewhere that needs her more, that she needs more. My issue, again related to needing the movie to be a little longer, is that Frozen II forgets “show, not tell” a couple times. We’re told every day’s a little harder as I feel my power grow in “Into the Unknown”, without ever being shown this. A scene of Elsa wrestling with a new, undiscovered part of her powers would go a long way in fleshing out this plot point, giving her some reason to be concerned and some real impetus for her to want to follow the siren call and find out more about herself and her powers. Later, she sings or are you someone out there who’s a little bit like me, who knows deep down I’m not where I’m meant to be? A beautiful, beautiful theme in these movies is allowing yourself to follow what makes you different, don’t bury it or push it away, because it’ll show you who you really are and what you’re meant to be, but the beginning of the movie fails to show us any scenes of Elsa really struggling with being in Arendelle before it has her sing about how she’s struggling with being in Arendelle.

As it is, we’re given this (beautiful) song about Elsa wanting to go into the unknown when, only a few minutes prior, she’s seen perfectly content in Arendelle, even expressing in “Some Things Never Change”: I’m not sure I want things to change at all. These days are precious, can’t let them slip away. She flip flops back and forth from perfectly content with her family to suddenly needing to be somewhere else while the beginning of “Into the Unknown” seems to suggest that the last thing she wants to do is try anything out of the norm, telling the voice I’m afraid of what I’m risking if I follow you.

The risk is there, given that we’re all familiar with the first movie and we’re familiar with Elsa’s character, familiar with the fact that she and Anna mean the world to each other and that family is the most important thing. The impetus for why she would take the risk of leaving her family is missing, and it could’ve really been fixed and/or smoothed over with a scene or two in the beginning (maybe instead of just jumping right into “Some Things Never Change”) that shows how Elsa is experiencing new powers and/or doubts about being queen. It makes 100% sense to me that Elsa would want to know about her powers, given that they’re such a big part of her life (for better or worse) and that no one else around her has them, but there could’ve been a better way to make this theme of “I want to know who I am” the main jumping off point for the plot.

This post here, which really inspired me to do my post, brings up a good point about some of the songs that were cut from the film. “I Seek the Truth”, a song for Elsa and Anna, in particular makes me think that the road map was there for them to be a little clearer about the plot and that, like many things, it was chopped up and cut for time. In the song, Elsa sings to their mother about how she feels lost, scared, and uneasy, but that she also feels like she needs to find the truth and learn more about her powers.

How do I be me and Arendelle? How do I govern this land with a power inside that I can’t command? It’s growing and speaking a language that I don’t understand.

Here is the set up for the conflict that pushes the rest of the story forward. Here is a song that they probably should’ve kept in. (Don’t get me wrong, I love “Into the Unknown”, but it’s always felt like “Let It Go”/awards season bait.)

If you’re going to make something the catalyst for the whole film, make sure you have enough evidence to back it up.

(Again, I do not doubt that Elsa could be feeling confined and out of place in Arendelle after being queen for three years, that’s not what I have issues with. I just wish we could’ve seen evidence to back these feelings up, rather than just letting us rely on our previous knowledge of Elsa and her character to be like “oh, okay”.)

What I Wanted More Of

There’s a lot I loved about this movie (maybe this post so far doesn’t seem that way, but I do) but also it left me with this incredible feeling of “want”. I wanted more out of a lot of the moments and the story lines. Like I discussed above, my biggest, overarching issue is that they wanted to do too much in the limited time that they had and that left some things desperately in need of being fleshed out more.

I wanted more of Iduna’s backstory. There seemed like there was way more of her and Agnarr in the early trailers, so this is something I’m just assuming was cut for time, because the art book devotes a whole page to little Iduna, who we barely even see. I actually just want a whole little side story about how she snuck back to Arendelle with Agnarr and how their relationship began and grew. A little exploration of how little Iduna felt with, presumably, her whole family either dead or stuck in the forest would’ve been great too.

Wanted more of why Elsa was feeling like she needed to leave Arendelle (already discussed above)

Related, wanted more of the Northuldra, who are introduced and then almost immediately left behind, only to reappear at the end and tell Elsa that she belongs there. And then she agrees to this?! Even though she’s spent next to no time with them?! I’m 100% okay with Elsa being the fifth spirit and finding herself (more on “Show Yourself” later) but more about the Northuldra and Iduna’s connection to them would make me less skeptical about the decisions made in the ending (more on THAT later too). I definitely though that Yelena was going to end up being their grandmother, or something similar that would’ve given the girls an even more special connection to them.

I wanted a moment where Elsa and Anna actually discuss Elsa abdicating the throne and Anna becoming queen. Instead it’s just like a thing that happens in between two other scenes. I want to see tears and “I promise I’ll visit all the time” and Anna accepting that Elsa has found a place where she’s at peace and Elsa telling Anna that she’ll be a great queen. More on this later.

I wanted Anna and Elsa’s reunion to be a little more dynamic, like Elsa jumping off Nokk and running to Anna and Anna splashing through the water to get to her and then them just sinking down in the water and crying. Something like that. I know, probably even now, that Elsa isn’t the most touchy person (just watch her body language in the charades scene) and that holding her arms out for Anna is her “thing”, but Anna thought Elsa was dead, so I think the reunion could’ve been a little MORE.

I actually kind of want the alternate ending that’s been floating around, the one where the water destroys Arendelle and then everyone works together to rebuild it. I know this is a Disney movie, but it just seemed a little too neat that Elsa was able to get there in time. I don’t really want the rumored ending where Elsa dies, because that seems unnecessary, but...

Things That Don’t Bother Me

AKA, things that I’ve seen others have issues with that that just don’t bother me.

I’ve seen a weird amount of complaints about how many songs there are, which makes me go ???, because there are actually less than the first film and I, personally, would’ve liked a couple more songs.

Some people think “Lost in the Woods” is out of place but I’m just happy Jonathan Groff got a whole song.

Elsa not being at Anna’s coronation: That’s not Anna’s coronation at the end of the film. She already been crowned (another scene I wish we could’ve had). So Elsa was most definitely at her coronation, I’m sure.

Elsa being too ethereal and unrelatable at the end: it’s true, I love Elsa and look up to her because I see my mental health struggles in her, but seeing her happy and free and smiling at the end of the film doesn’t make me love her any less. She’s not some all-powerful being. “Show Yourself” isn’t about her becoming an otherworldly spirit goddess, it’s about her seeing herself for who she really is. Sure, she has a new pretty dress and a new pretty horse. But she’s still Elsa. She’s just an Elsa that knows where she belongs and who she is and she’s happy. And I feel like that’s definitely something everyone with mental illness hopes for someday. I do admit struggling with myself about this point, though, because I still would like to see her try to balance her newfound confidence with her mental illness.

Anna being too clingy and annoying: Anna working through her co-dependence is a big part of her journey in the film. Keep in mind, this girl had a childhood shaped by abandonment: her sister shutting her out of her life and then her parents dying unexpectedly while her sister still shut her out when they should’ve been grieving together. She then turns to the first guy who proposes to her (Hans) only to have him try to kill her and Elsa and just turn out to be a terrible human being, So it makes absolute sense that Anna, despite having a relatively stable, happy life with Kristoff and Elsa, still has some of these residual fears. She spent 13 years begging her sister to speak to her. It makes sense now that her greatest fear is losing her again. So I don’t find her worry and the way she clings to Elsa to be annoying or out of character. She’s still working through some trauma, just like Elsa, and that’s part of why “The Next Right Thing” is so powerful. It’s her picking herself back up and growing and telling herself she can do this.

There isn’t an actual villain: a movie without a villain and without conflict would be a bad idea. There would be no stakes. Luckily, the “villain” in Frozen II comes from the internal conflict both girls have. The “bad guy” they have to defeat is their own internal obstacles. I much prefer watching them grow and change in this very real way instead of watching them defeat some cardboard cutout villain standing in the corner and laughing maniacally.

I’m actually okay with Anna and Elsa not being together at the end of the film (that’s not my issue with the ending) but only because we all know she can gallop on her magical horse from Ahtohallan to Arendelle in less time than it took the water to break from the dam and rush towards Arendelle, so she can come home whenever. And that is really the only thing that gives me piece about them not being together. That and the very peaceful, free look on Elsa’s face right at the very end.

The Ending

I know there’s been a lot of discussion about the ending. And I have my own feelings about it too.

Like I said above, it’s not the separation, really, that frustrates me, because I can appease myself by telling myself that they still see each other all the time. Of course I would’ve preferred them not to separate at all.

I understand the whole justification of “sisters don’t live together their entire life, they’re growing up and growing apart” thing that’s been going around, but it just doesn’t feel like it fits for these two particular characters. That, and the fact that Disney seems like they’ve fallen into this “separation” trope. This film, Toy Story 4, and Ralph Breaks the Internet have all ended in very similar ways.

I am a little frustrated that they decide that the best place for socially awkward, insecure Elsa is the forest, alone, with a bunch of people (the Northuldra) who weren’t fleshed out enough to give her any sort of reason to want to live with them. Meanwhile, free-spirit Anna becomes the queen. Anna goes through a lot of growth in this movie so it’s not actually her new role that I’m skeptical of. It’s putting Elsa, given her background, where she ends up. And maybe if the movie had taken time (again, it all comes back to more time) to give us more of the Northuldra and give Elsa more of a relationship with them, I could be like “okay, she belongs there”. But does she? The forest is saved and the spirits are at rest and tamed. What does she do all day then? I honestly want to know.

Just because she is magic doesn’t really provide enough justification, for me, for her to have to live there with them. It’s not like she faces fear and prejudice in Arendelle for her magical abilities. The beginning of the film and the shorts seem to suggest that the people love her magic. So, I would’ve preferred an ending in which she could still tame the spirits and get her magical makeover and then go home with Anna, returning to the forest whenever she pleased and whenever she needed, but continuing to, if not be the queen, at least be there to advise Anna.

The good part is this gives me a lot of good ideas for future fanfics.

Things I Loved

This whole post up until now is probably making you wonder if I really loved any of the movie. The truth is, I loved a whole lot of it, but since Frozen is so important to me, I feel especially critical of it. I have to get nitpick-y, especially when I think they could’ve done even more.

However, I loved:

the animation. That really goes without saying. The film, the colors, every moment was just beautiful. I’m always in awe of the advancement of animation.

the humor. It could’ve gone one of two ways with so much Olaf humor. It went the “this movie is funny as hell” route and I am so glad. I’m still randomly saying “Samantha?!” to myself.

the more mature songs. I’ve seen people say they didn’t like the music as well and that none of the songs are catchy. I love that they’re a little more mature and a little less “Disney bops”. I cry every time I hear “Show Yourself”, “All is Found” is hauntingly beautiful, and “Lost in the Woods” is a really poignant song, if you look past the reindeer chorus.

I love that they didn’t go out of their way to make this movie appeal to everyone. Yes, it has flaws. Oh yes. But it’s dark and it’s mature and it’s a little weird. Not every little kid is going to like it, but they didn’t try and dumb it down to appeal to every little kid out there.

The growth for the girls. I already touched on Anna’s growth re: her co-dependence, but Elsa has a lot of growth too, obviously. Seeing GIF sets of her in the first movie and her in the second, I just want to cry, honestly. Seeing her be confident and sure of herself and happy with who she is and even just the way she and Anna are able to casually cuddle and hold hands when she was terrified to touch her AT ALL in the first movie. I’m overwhelmed. Strong characters can sometimes help out a chaotic plot (or a plot with too much going on) and if there’s anything Frozen specializes in, it’s the strong, beautiful characters we know and love.

“SHOW YOURSELF”. This fucking scene. I can’t listen to the song or watch the scene without SOBBING. Many things about it kill me. I’ve never felt so certain, all my life I’ve been torn. But I’m here for a reason, could it be the reason I was born? and the way she steps into the middle of the elements and it shows her snowflake and the way she says “Mother?” with tears in her eyes and the little “hand over the mouth” movement she does because she’s so happy and the DRESS CHANGE and when she starts crying and You are the one you’ve been looking for-all of my life! and I am found! Geez. Just thinking about it makes me cry.

One of the main things I wanted from Frozen II was a story in which Elsa wasn’t made to feel bad about herself (in Frozen, she hurt Anna and blamed everything on her and her powers; in FF, she blamed herself for getting sick and messing up Anna’s birthday; in Olaf’s Frozen Adventure, she blamed herself for ruining their Christmas tradition, etc.) and it delivered. I love seeing her smiling and embracing her powers. I’m okay that Anna didn’t give her a dressing down at the end like “how dare you put us in an ice canoe and push us away.” It’s nice to see Elsa gets some wins.

Elsa talking to the memory of her grandfather, saying “That’s not what magic does, that’s just your fear.” Coming from someone who used to be so afraid of her magic that she locked herself away for 13 years, this is just an awesome, confident moment for Elsa.

“The Next Right Thing” and the absolute pain in Anna’s voice as she says when it's clear that everything will never be the same again. An awesome performance from Kristen Bell.

“I don’t want to stop you from being whoever you need to be, I just don’t want you to die trying to be everything to everyone all the time.” Yikes, this line has hit me both times like a gut punch. Perfectionism and anxiety go hand in hand and, oftentimes, people with anxiety feel like they need to go out of their way and run themselves into the ground trying to please everyone to appease their own anxious feelings. I speak from experience.

The parallel between the scene in the first movie where Elsa tells Anna she belongs in Arendelle, Anna says “so do you” and Elsa replies “No, I belong here where I can be who I am without hurting anybody” vs. her decision to live somewhere other than Arendelle in the second movie that doesn’t come as a result of her trying not to hurt people but as a result of her being free and knowing, finally, who she is and allowing herself to be this person. It’s beautiful. It’s beautiful growth for our anxious little queen.

The themes are mature and gorgeous. Growing older (it hit hard when Olaf said “and you all look a little bit older”); acknowledging that things in your life will change and that you have to embrace the change sometimes, because change leads to growth; knowing that it’s okay to be angry at people, even people you love, and that your feelings are valid; embracing what makes you different, because those differences are beautiful and will let you be who you are; the power of finding where you’re meant to be/knowing what you’re meant to do; taking things one step at a time even when taking any steps at all seem impossible; acknowledging the past without allowing yourself to dwell on it and be consumed by it. Gorgeous. I’ve said many times that Frozen II tried to do a little too much, but all these themes are just beautiful.

Anyway. This is so long and I’m so sorry. I’ll probably be back with more thoughts after I see it a third and fourth time!

I really do love this movie. If I seem super critical, it’s all from a place of love. I love this franchise. I love these beautiful films. I love the amazing characters they’ve brought into my life. I’ve wrestled the last couple days with how much I truly love Frozen II vs. how much I wish they had had the time to explore all the ideas they obviously wanted to explore (I hope we get some shorts or an extended edition) because it’s obvious that all these ideas were there and ready to be fully explored.

Anyway, if you read this giant essay, thank you. It became like 3x longer that I was planning on, but I could talk about Frozen for HOURS.

#frozen 2 #frozen #frozen 2 spoilers #frozen II spoilers #disney #elsa #anna #olaf #kristoff #frozen ii #sven #disney frozen #review

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ifthearmorfitsarchived · 5 years ago

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THE POSITIVE & NEGATIVE: MUN & MUSE

Fill out & Repost ♥ This meme definitely favors Canons more, but I hope OC's still can make it somehow work with their own lore and Lil’ fandom of friends & mutuals. Multimuses pick the muse you are the most invested in atm.

Tagged by: @sweet-talkin-gladiator (thank you :> ) Tagging: @forgedcold, @fortwarden, @abuzzingofbumblebees, @incendiius, @sparkmender, @panickedforcefield, @polyhexianchicken, @blubrownrpblog and er.. anyone else that wants to? You can say I tagged you or whatever.

MY MUSE IS. canon / oc / au / canon-divergent / fandomless

is your character popular in the fandom? YES (???) / NO.

is your character considered hot™ in the fandom? WELL… / NO / IDK. (I think he’s hot...)

is your character considered strong in the fandom? YES / NO / IDK. (I think he’s strong as well considering he’s a load-bearer and whatnot)

are they underrated? YES (???) / NO.

were they relevant to the main story? YES (...???) / NO.

were they relevant to the main character? YES (???) / NO

are they widely known in their world? YES (As Ultra Magnus yes but as Minimus Ambus... No) / NO.

how’s their reputation? GOOD / BAD / NEUTRAL.

HOW STRICTLY DO YOU FOLLOW CANON?

I mean.. I try to follow the canon as close as I can. I’ve read the comics, anayalzed him to hell and back and just.. yeah. I follow canon, but I also add in my own twists here and there so that he’s still following canon, but still... different? If that makes sense.

SELL YOUR MUSE! (aka try to list everything, which makes your muse interesting in your opinion to make them spicy for your mutual.)

In my eyes, he is the ideal enforcer.. in that he isn’t biassed towards who he brings to justice. You can be an Autobot, Decepticon, Neutral, Alien, or hell even human and he’d still make sure you are given a fair trial with the proper lawyer because you still broke the law.

He is very sassy when he needs to be as in, he isn’t afraid to put you in your place, especially when he’s protecting someone. If you’re going to make assumptions about someone, 10/10 he’s going to shove facts into your face about how WRONG you are and then proceed to ripe you a new one all without so much as twitching once. I love this.

Despite being stern and seemingly emotionless, he’s not really. He just keeps all those emotions inside for the most part and rarely shows them. He is essentially selfless, caring and willing to protect anyone who needs protecting. He has issues of his own, but he’s willing to put said issue to the side to take care of your issues and your wellbeing because those matter to him more. The moments he allows himself to open up and be vulenable for just a second it.. it truly is heartwrenching, but in a good way.

NOW THE OPPOSITE! (list everything why your muse could not be so interesting (even if you may not agree, what does the fandom perhaps think?)

He’s a work-a-holic, in that he will put his work before anything else. Even at the expense of his heath. He’s stubborn like that.

He doesn’t know how to relax or have fun, at least in the ways others do. While others want to get rip-roaring drunk and party, he avoids those sorts of scenes at all costs and may even start to issue citations because there are rules being broken.

Oh yeah.. he’s a stickler for rules. Will never break one no matter what, so that can make him a kill-joy. He’s also prone to cleaning obsessively because of his OCD and anxiety and just doesn’t know how to strike up a proper converstation.

WHAT INSPIRED YOU TO RP YOUR MUSE?

I’ve been wanting to RP as Ultra Magnus / Minimus Ambus for like the longest of times since I came across him in the comics the first time he came out, but I was so shy and had anxiety about tackling such a big role. I kept putting it off because I didn’t think I could portray him correctly or others wouldn’t like how I wrote him. I finally gave in though because someone I admired wanted me to try after I mention wanting to try my hand at him and since I gave up so many others I wanted to RP as, I thought this time.. I’m going to do it and so I did. While I do still have some anxiety regarding my portrayal among other things, I’m enjoying myself and I’m glad others are actually enjoying my portrayal as well. You have no idea how much that means to me really. Besides I just.. find him so interesting really. He’s a gentleman, intelligent, resourceful, handsome (in my eyes), loves the arts and needs to be loved honestly.

WHAT KEEPS YOUR INSPIRATION GOING?

I guess the fact that I’m enjoying writing this muse and that others are enjoying him as well? Really, if it wasn’t for some of you I probably wouldn’t have taken on Minimus and just wondered about it like I did with other muses I wanted to try my hand at.

SOME MORE PERSONAL QUESTIONS FOR THE MUN.

do you think you give your character justice? YES / NO. (I mean I feel like I do yet don’t???)

do you frequently write headcanons? YES / NO.

do you sometimes write drabbles? YES / NO.

do you think a lot about your muse during the day? YES (I do that with all my muses honestly...) / NO.

are you confident in your portrayal? YES / NO. (This is rather laughable really)

are you confident in your writing? YES / NO. (HAH!)

are you a sensitive person? YES / NO. (...It depends I guess?? Sometimes I can be and sometimes you have to try harder than that bucko)

DO YOU ACCEPT CRITICISM WELL ABOUT YOUR PORTRAYAL?

I wouldn’t mind it yes? As long as it’s CRITICISM and not just flat out hate like I have recieved before. Telling me the way I’m writing the muse sucks isn’t going to help me get better. You’re just insulting me. Tell me how to improve. Give me tidbits and or hints. Provide helpful criticism. Some of you don’t know how to do that and it shows.

DO YOU LIKE QUESTIONS, WHICH HELP YOU EXPLORE YOUR CHARACTER?

I think everyone does really. It helps not only you but your muse as well. It helps you get a better feeling on your muse and expand their background and whatnot, so yeah. I do.

IF SOMEONE DISAGREES TO A HEADCANON OF YOURS, DO YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY?

Not.. really? Considering it’s my headcanon and it’s my interepation of the muse, not theirs. I mean I’m open to new headcanons and if I like it, I may addapt it to my own but I also can refuse it if I feel like it doesn’t fit with my portrayal. If you don’t like my portrayal, you’re welcome to unfollow. Not that hard really.

IF SOMEONE DISAGREES WITH YOUR PORTRAYAL, HOW WOULD YOU TAKE IT?

...Unfollow? I feel like I’m doing a decent enough job on my portral. If you don’t like it, unfollow and move on. Simple.

IF SOMEONE REALLY HATES YOUR CHARACTER, HOW DO YOU TAKE IT?

Everyone has their likes and dislikes. It’s how the world is. How people are. If you don’t like my muse, that’s fine. I don’t care. Just don’t send me messages about it or whatever. I don’t care for that shit.

ARE YOU OKAY WITH PEOPLE POINTING OUT YOUR GRAMMATICAL ERRORS?

I don’t mind as long as they’re not an ass about it... Like calling me stupid or an idiot. Not everyone can write perfectly or even speaks / writes English. Remember that. Some of us also have issues with speaking and or typing. Remember that.

DO YOU THINK YOU ARE EASY GOING AS A MUN?

I mean.. I like to think I am? Besides my horrible social anxiety and other problems, I try to be nice and friendly. If someone sends me something, I try my best to reply to it in a timely manner. I try my best not to bother people too much but at the same time, I try to be supportive and caring if I see someone is down or needs help with something. I don’t ever rush others for replies since I know real life always comes first. I also don’t force interactions or shipping or what-have-you. I’m just here to have fun and write, which I’m sure a great majority of us are. Having said that, if you ever want to message me or get to know me, please don’t be afraid to do so. I’m not a mean person by any degree really. The only time I’m rude if is someone is rude to me first, but that’s really the only instance. I don’t like to start conflict or drama. That sort of stuff causes me anxiety anyways, so yeah.. Enjoy yourselves, okay?

#﹙ Mᴇᴍᴇ ﹚ Yᴏᴜ ᴜsᴇ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʜᴇᴀʀᴛ ᴀs ᴀ ᴡᴇᴀᴘᴏɴ Aɴᴅ ɪᴛ ʜᴜʀᴛs ʟɪᴋᴇ ʜᴇᴀᴠᴇɴ #﹙ OOC ﹚ Oᴘᴏ sᴘᴇᴀᴋs

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