#sighs they're a mess bUT
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@r4bidog said: “an exhausted drug king easily walks into matt's bedroom and plops on his bed while he's reading a book ; he lazily starts to toy with the end of matt's shirt as he stares up at the ceiling . his scar is getting better , and everyone calls him a boss , and he's killed way too many men to reach here . ❛ i feel like i'm gonna die . . . ❜ / hi i missed them idk .” {♚ x Meme I am too lazy to find right now || Accepting x}
Gangjae just walking into Matt’s room—without knocking, mind you—wasn’t exactly unheard of, nor was him making himself at home on Matt’s bad as though he owned it. Which, if one wanted to be pedantic about it, he technically did. But even though it wasn’t unheard of and even though Matt should really be used to it by now, it still made his heart miss a beat every single time; and he never failed to remind himself just how much he hated himself for it. It was a stupid crush, a hopeless crush, and yet he seemed unable to shake it, regardless of many girls he saw disappear in and out of his friend’s room. And, of course, every time he thought he might stand a chance of getting over it, Gangjae felt the need to do something to draw him right back in.
Without lifting his gaze from his book, Matt raised his eyebrows as he turned a page and let out a sigh. “Yeah? What’s killing you this time? The alcohol? The drugs? The countless girls? Or everything combined?” Okay, perhaps a little too obvious. Glancing at the other, Matt gave him a once over, then shrugged his shoulders. “You look perfectly fine to me. As fine as you'll ever be, anyway.”
#{♚ x A bird does not sing because it has an answer. It sings because it has a song [ANSWERED] x}#{♚ x v; Just keep in mind one thing: the prize is your life [MY NAME] x}#{♚ x dyn; r4bidog » tbd [MATT&GANGJAE] x}#r4bidog#sighs they're a mess bUT#Yeah I missed them too I guess?
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Just wanted to doodle the rgb siblings
#playing with their designs a bit. eyes hornet is really cool I've seen people draw her like that.. just torn on permanency#hollow knight#hk hornet#hk ghost#hk thk#xylocope#also i say rgb siblings as if they're actually rgb here#SIKE hornet is SLIGHTLY REDDISH BROWN hollow is GREYBROWN ghost is PURPLE#GET CLOWNED ON.... OR SOMETHING#sigh colors my accursed lover#was fun messing with them though here. trying to do more relaxing on my eye doodles#so this was a fun exercise
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No, no, no. You don't know how feral I went over that BTS article about the costumes and makeup in BJBJ I reblogged tonight. It was just more confirmation for me that Betelgeuse was indeed written to be in real fucking love with Lydia in this movie! Like as if I needed any more confirmation, but yeah, you're telling me it was a conscious choice to make him look like he'd been waiting (for Lydia!) all these years? Like his costumes are designed around the man's pining! And his looks too! They literally even decided he'd gained weight and all. He was waiting around, longing all these years just for her, like??? I am absolutely feral. It's in the little details.
#I go nuts#The man was sitting around sighing and pining for his babe all these years I am a mess#I am an emotionally compromised fangirl rn#Beetlejuice Beetlejuice#BJBJ bts stuff#Beetlebabes#Beetlejuice x Lydia#BeetleLyds#I can hear Salt-N-Peppa's song “Whatta Man” playing in the distance#Betelgeuse is sweet and he wants One goth lady and no one else#Don't come at me about dadbods lmao I am weak for men with tummies#They're so cute and huggable#don't mind me lol
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i love my advisor. he's really nice and is always like "i believe in you!" when things get hard. unfortunately sir, you are my professor for advanced calculus and you. see my grades. im fucked. im going ta fail this class lmao
#spacie spoinks#still don't know howta study for reasoning/proof courses. trying.#there aren't problems I can do and check my work. b/c the problems don't have. answers#like they have answers they're just not. written down anywhere#anyway I'm fucked#started atstudying a week ago and I'm still fucked#I am the only person in that class that is struggling I think b/c he makes eye contact w/me a lot 😭#''do we all understand this?'' looks at me#sigh#the answer is yes in the moment but talk ta me later and I will not have retained anything#messed up dude
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Happy, happy, cereal-covered boy. 🥣🥛
Mythical Society
Are You Gonna Eat That? BTS
#mythical society#mythical rewind#unlisted bts video#music video#are you gonna eat that? 🎶#link neal#link sans specs#giggles 😆#what a delicious looking hot mess#😋😋😋#i don't love that mythical is unlisting these old bts videos and then putting them up on the society#but at least they're not gone#and now this smiley happy boy is on my blog forever#sigh 🥰#my edit
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Hey! I know you might be a busy, so sorry to crowd up your asks, but I have a little question.
Rainy’s hair looks like- really, really soft. Does he have a secret?? Or any other hairstyles he likes?? I need to know 😭
oh! don't worry! I'm not very busy actually... (at least not until school starts back up anyways!)
(also my ask box is usually empty... so seeing this was a nice change!)
but anyways, Rainy is a puppet made for sleeping and cuddling, admittedly I do think he was just made that way! Very soft, he's just a 3 ft tall plushie honestly!
So no secrets, sorry! bwah! (unless the secret is... be a puppet? ahaha!)
as for hairstyles! Rainy likes their hair down usually, they're usually messing with it or toying with the strands, curling it with their fingers all the time, it's sort of a stim for them!
(i suppose any hairstyles that have some strands free to toy with are good in their book!)
#his hair is pretty soft...#he would let you mess with his hair#one of Rainy's love languages is physical touch! he likes hugs and things like that#so if you run your fingers through their hair they will sigh fondly#theyre not very good with words#so touch is like one of those things that helps them communicate how they're feeling!#rainy dewdrop#welcome home oc#myart#chit chat
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Would you or have you done a face reveal before? Or any one of your otherkin partners?
I can tell you already that Orion would never do a face reveal, and that Chimeras isn't exactly likely to do one either. We're a triad that tends to value our privacy.
My friends have seen what I look like on Discord calls and similar, but I don't have any plans to be like "AHA! BEHOLD MINE FACE!" on Tumblr or any other social media platform any time soon-- it might happen on my Twitch someday if I set up my camera, but, we'll have to see. Though don't worry anon, I can reassure you that I'm cute as fuck. Just ask my partners. Imagine curly red hair, dimples, and sturdy-as-fuck figure built from years of marching band and kickboxing, and you pretty much already know what I look like.
#Ask#Anonymous#Orion and Chimeras are SO HANDSOME#-gay sigh-#Trust me you guys are missing out they are absolutely smoking#Two& total cuties#I am looking so respectfully at them 24/7#How is it legal for them to be so incredibly good-looking#❤️💕 my poor bisexual heart can't take how hot my partners are#Before I was dating either of them the first time I saw each of them I had Gay Panic#I was like OH NO THEY'RE SO HOT#this sounds like an exaggeration but it entirely isn't#I was a MESS I was trying SO HARD TO KEEP MY COOL
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just #final girl things <3
#tw blood#ross mccall#serving up richard#bob cast#this fucking movie#one untapped thing about ross is that he has comedic potential and this movie fucking highlights it#his little '... ok' when glory tells him that everett cursed her so she can never escape made me cry with laughter#just. god this whole film was a mess but look at him look at my baby#love it when they're covered in blood <3#these are from imdb btw i couldnt screenshot from the apple tv bc they don't allow it SIGH
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downloading the preview so i can watch it without giving hybe my views or anything 😃
#lowkey upset for txt bc this is blowing up right on their comeback but hybe keeps being a piece of lowkey zionist shit so...#sigh#i was gonna gif the preview video but i think it's better if i don't lol#this is so frustrating tho bc like you wanna support the group but not their company#so you kinda have to affect the people that bring you comfort bc it's the only way to affect the people above them#bc they're supporting GENOCIDE#yikes what a mess#🌙.txt
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its so weird to read some of my old fics (do NOT do it but i'm just being hypothetical rn) and reading it. like who even was this person?? i completely was in a haze back in 2020. i literally was posting 3 chapters a day. A DAY. what in the WORLD was that shit.
anyway i remembered some STUPID sappy shit and i didnt remember if i'd put it into a fic or not BUT I FOUND IT.
She and Hope had been dating in secret for months anyway, and any attempt to go talk to Ryan only filed her disposition of displeasure upon knowing that she couldn’t tell anyone, Molly especially, it destroyed herself mentally. They couldn’t really go anywhere near the school, always having to lie to everyone about having projects together when Molly wasn’t around them. It’d consisted with 9 PM - 2 AM intervals of being able to actually see each other. Hope would sneak through her small bedroom window with a portable record player and whatever she had gotten from the vintage record store downtown, and Amy would always fall asleep around eleven because of her internal clock. She would always wake up to find a single sticky note stuck on the edge of her desk whenever she woke up to her alarm the next morning. One of them, Amy still had tucked inside of her phone case, a heavily detailed human heart, with blue and red ink sketched onto a neon pink sticky note, there was a caption that headed the small paper reading the phrase over every now and again makes her almost melt every time. “You have my heart.”
yeah idk why the fuck but i thought of this fucking idea again today and i was like "omg did i ever put that heart note thing in a fic???" yeah you fucking did.
all that to say ME AND WHO???? imagine. thats so fucking.... RAHHHH.
#NOT TOH FANFIC#see this is why i write fanfic. to enact some gay ass shit like this.#the fucking STICKY NOTE WITH A DRAWING OF A HUMAN HEART AND SAYING “YOU HAVE MY HEART” I AM ON THE FLOOR.#*sighs* sucks i cant reuse it on lumity though.#my friend making me realize i actually have rizz but am just too much of a disaster to actually understand cues with people#its a MESS. im just all over the place. i literally ranted to THE SAME FRIEND yesterday (or the day before??) abt some girl jesus.#anyway i remember writing A LOT OF POETRY back in hs about this one girl and then the same girl i got to talk to--#--my first actual conversation with her i blurted out that i wanted to shave my head. she was like.... oooooo god i was A MESS#still slid into her school dms during covid and was like “haha guess what i actually mf did???” anyway all that to say underlying dysphoria#they're nonbinary now too and i kinda ghosted them like a complete idiot :(. its been two years or so but i still think of them... a lot...#actually i have more lore about this person and its like istg they actually really liked me but i could not pick it up.#we had such SUCH good chemistry and vibes. n they were really pretty. ughhhhhh.#anyway yeah idk crushes are weird sometimes. the universe knows how unstoppable id be with a partner#i feel like i was the reason they were able to find themself and their identity because when we were talking i always encouraged them#and told them to do what felt right. im glad they did. i think sometimes that brings me peace. like i served a purpose.#STILL showed them toh. STILL SHOWED THEM TOH.#we were talking about amity LMAO “this green haired girl seems interesting” SHE SO WAS.#...yeah i wish i could text them but i kinda probably fucked it up.#shitposting shit#idk what this post is i just wanted to talk about this dumb sticky note thing because im rotating it in my brain and remembering how#mentally ill i was back in 2020#talking into the void yk how it isssss
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-randomly sees a screenshot of jamie and lily from the city of bones movie, where they seem to embody jace and clary, and am once again sad that we didn't get a city of ashes movie-
#like. to be clear. i KNOW that the city of bones movie has flaws--and i can tell you what they all are--but for me at least the positives#outweigh the negatives#and one of those things is that the cast really was perfect imo (and a lot of other people's opinions too)#though that's not to insult the shadowhunters cast at all of course. i think they're great and did the best with what they were give#i. personally. just don't really like shadowhunters because of how much they changed from the books#and even outside of that--if i ignored book to show comparisons--at least with the first season (the only one i watched) a lot of the#choices they were making with their own rules they were making didn't make a lot of sense. though i hear it gets better if season one so#maybe i should give it another chance sometime...#but back to city of ashes... i feel like. if city of bones had done well. city of ashes could have been better than city of bones and even#more book accurate (since that was some fans' issues with the first film) since the studio would have realized there was an audience there#and to take it more seriously. we've seen that kind of thing before. like with how the twilight movies actually became more book accurate#after the first film was a success#though that's not the world we live in of course. -sighs- oh well#maybe someday we'll get a really good and accurate tmi adaptation#i'm also looking forward to/cautiously optimistic about the the infernal devices show. PLEASE don't mess it up. PLEASE#that's my--and many--fans' favorite of the shadow world series. and it could/should be SO good. PLEASE!
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finally actually working towards fixing my blogs lol 💪
#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚#THE PROBLEM W ME... though... is i want to fix every single post on this account. which isn't. very. good.#considering i have thousands of posts and i am a very busy student but will that stop me !! probably not.#i'm NOT going to change my tags anymore i think. that'd probably kill me#there's a website tho ik but STILL.....!! troublesome. so. anyway!#gna start writing here soon again but that's dependent on whether i get my shit fully together finally. aaand i'm fixing my selfship#sb and etc etc etc yes <3 it just turned 12 am honestly i don't think i have the braincells rn#i want to COLLAPSE !!!!! tbf i could. totally do so. there's nothing important for me to worry over anymore#i mean yeah i might have a quiz later today but our teacher hasn't responded to email my classmate sent eyaghhhhhhh#SO. idk. we were supposed to do a lab fun thingy yesterday BUT THEN we got. noon classes suspended. weird shit. sigh#so.....!!! so.#it's physics and honestly going to be pretty easy since they're giving the equations so i'll just brush up on my knowledge#and then the concepts etc ... oh god. or maybe i could just yk... sleep...!#idk. anyway. HII GOOD JUST-TURNED-TECHNICALLY-MORNING-BUT-IT'S-MIDNIGHT FROM ME ^_^#i am so ill (figuratively) i am a mess but i'll Fix Things#yk what would be so good for this all... exercise..... i at least am able to walk a lot everyday bcs of school but STILL#okay bye from me now. i am. TIRED... bye <3
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Day 6! Favorite OC ship
#unfortunately i suck at drawing kissing otherwise they would've been#an e ways them <3#Oc: Babel#Oc: Sigh#they're so messed up i love them#messy lesbians who my mother would kill me for creating#babel and sigh#little nightmares oc#side note our dog keeps growl/groaning and i cannot fathom why
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this recent re-interest in quinn brought to you by the mental image of him getting introduced to neko atsume while pointing his gun at someone's head.
there aren't, in fact, better ways of checking that a suspicious person isn't There On The Job than either checking their pockets or knocking them out and stashing them in a cupboard until he's more certain - or at least finished. and no self-respecting professional would have that much personal shit on their phone.
though neko atsume isn't that incriminating, so I like to think he absolutely checks up on the cats when he gets quiet moments sometimes. allegedly burner phone with ten different cartoon kitty screenshots all dated within the past week. <3
#the person he points the gun at is fine btw#they're the kind of messed up that means processing the scary situation for like‚ two days#then coming out of it with the conclusion that That's How You Make Friends#this is purely a for me and for joy writing thing and probably won't get very far#but I did love that initial image#quinn tag#the chances that tag will get used much are ALSO very low but. sigh etc let me have this.#leaning into the Shared OC vibes for dopamine reasons.#also. I will have to get the game again because I do not remember enough but.#I feel like it wouldn't be the end of the world to have to start over every week or so?#it's the Checking In not the Progressing that sparks most joy#though if he DID start to be reluctant to ditch phones and thus reluctant to take risky jobs because of this. hm. HM. taking notes.
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My current favorite Tumblr idiosyncracy is when it suggests posts based on tags I'm following or whatever, and it's a muted word post.
The epitome of the Tumblr experience.
#oh Tumblr#it makes me giggle every time#said in that tone of voice#the one that implies they're a mess but you find their antics charming anyway#tumblr#sigh
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Having an enjoyment response to a trigger is such an exhausting contradiction to be stuck with. Like. Am I actually capable of enjoying this thing or is it just a coping/safety response? Does it actually matter? Why can't I consistently enjoy it why is it like reverse russian roulette where only one out of six times it's the blank where I come out of the encounter relatively unbothered and the other five times I act like I've seen The Horrors just by hearing it spoken of. Most importantly how do I navigate this trigger when I don't understand which response to follow the lead of/encourage/take cues from. Send help
#this is mostly rhetorical. ig i could take input but i suspect i need actual involved therapy to get to the bottom of this one#ramblingonandon#honestly part of the problem is as far as being a system goes is it's clearly a case of having specific parts find enjoyment#but they're also very vocal and tend to seek out further exposure which does not seem to necessarily Help anything unfortunately#instead it just makes the headspace a clamoring mess that tears me in all directions#sighs.
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