#sick today and very tired
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Note
Wait what was electric bogalo callum like when he was “missing?” Was he happy? Did he enjoy it?
he definitely enjoyed it. the freedom, being able to fly around all the time, being in the clouds—it was amazing. of course that was ruined when they found him and got him into his room. he's all jumpy and twitchy. he can't move as much as he wants, he can't fly anywhere. it's like locking a large parrot in a tiny bird cage.
#sorry for like. not answering any asks#sick today and very tired#baby is gonna hatch soon and I'm keeping an eye on that#havent really had any motivation#itll come back tho i promise#tdp au#tdp neon sky au#neon sky au#the dragon prince au
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
🍷<3
#when i got hashtag sick i was in hospital and i was doing my regularly scheduled call with my dad#and i really had no plans of telling him bc ive done that before and its not like he can scare the MS away or anything#i dont know what happened. maybe because it was such a fucking bad episode. maybe because i was so tired. maybe it was a secret 3rd thing#but one minute was like fine then i just burst into tears and i was crying so hard which is MEGA EW BC IM NOT A CRIER LIKE THAT#and my dad freaked out and he was like whats wrong and i didnt wanna tell him but I also sounded insane bc i spontaneously started sobbing#and he was getting more alarmed and i was upset that id upset him and so i just spat it out i was like 'listen king'#'its no biggie but my body is trying to kill me again and im just a little sad atm' and he replied 'baba why wouldnt you tell me?'#and this man who has a very big serious job literally dropped everything and took a 20 hr flight over#and he genuinely just grabbed one of his work suitcase because he showed up with nothing but dress shirts and his laptop#and i think maybe it healed me a little. i mean it def also made me sad too but mostly healed me#and he'd been here for a couple of weeks and he left today and i feel shit about being sad about it#again because he has a very big and very serious job and i genuinely dont understand how he even just showed up like that#so I felt guilty throughout#anyway i dont think he drinks anymore but i was like king have a sip of wine with me and he did and it was lovely#and I hope I become my fathers daughter and not my mother's child. praying to both our gods#heres to healing ❤️🩹
40 notes
·
View notes
Text
Forgive me for showing my fangs a little here instead of being as delicate in phrasing as I usually am, but. Periodic reminder:
sweeping "humans suck, humans are evil, the world would be better off if humans disappeared/had never evolved" statements may be cathartic but they're thoroughly inaccurate (ie, the vast majority of uniquely bad effects of humans on the planet are a) extremely recent, like within the last couple centuries, b) the fault of an extremely small minority not the entire fucking species, and c) fixable)
hating being human isn't the same as hating humans. I get species dysphoria is a thing. I get that it's often hard to fit in as a nonhuman in human social groups and that can make it easy to slip into hating everyone around you. Please fight that instinct
villainizing people for traits they didn't choose, such as the species they were born into, is neither cute nor fair. No species is inherently good or bad
misanthropy is cathartic in short term vents or whatever but genuinely embracing it wholesale as a philosophy is liable to lead to you hating humans, human society, and being in a human body more and more over time and thus make your life worse by constantly reinforcing a thought pattern that makes you angry and upset
you are not immune to being part of human society (translation: just because you're nonhuman doesn't mean you're not included in statements about the effects of the human population on the world, ie "humans are killing the planet")
related, you are not better than humans for being nonhuman. looking at my fellow dragons in particular on this one. I get it, draconic pride is a thing, dragon brain probably says you're the supreme being and all else is beneath you especially anyone who annoys you. Mine does too. Please recognize that is an instinct you are supposed to FIGHT, not something that's TRUE AND THAT YOU SHOULD EMBRACE. Good fucking gods.
some nonhumans are also human (it's me, I'm some nonhumans) and you are making sweeping "humans suck, why would I ever want to be human, all humans do is kill the planet" statements in the presence of people included in those statements, which is insanely rude (and no, you don't get to "but you're different because you're nonhuman" me! you do not get to decide to ignore half of who I am because you don't like it, you do not get to decide I'm not "really" human, and also see the previous bullet point). this goes doubly if you're in a space like a DIscord server where people have expressly stated they're not comfortable being tacitly included in statements like that
saying "but I don't REALLY mean all humans, I just mean the specific ones at fault!" after the fact does not actually change anything if every other thing you say is constantly "humans humans humans" and not the group you're actually referring to, or at the very least doesn't change how it reads to everyone around you
#otherkin#misanthropy#rani talks#rani is biting today sorry#if you want me to dial it back and explain any of this in a calmer tone please ask i will be happy to do so#i'm just. aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa#sick and fucking tired of seeing 'humans bad' in the otherkin community on a regular basis. ITS ME. IM HUMANS. STOP IT#it's not a constructive mindset!! it's not!! there's no constructive conclusion that can come out of misanthropy as a core philosophy!#all it can lead to is either 'nothing is fixable' which is a recipe for depression#or 'humans should be exterminated' which is GENOCIDAL#and it's fucking ALWAYS accompanied by 'but i'm better because i'm [x] instead har har har' No The Fuck You Are Not#you participate in society exactly the same way a human would#you are exactly as responsible for the effects of humanity on the world as anyone else around you#which is to say not very fucking much!#anyway /tag rant i'm hitting post before i think better of this one
398 notes
·
View notes
Text
day 46 drawing len until my preorder arrives
i sincerely apologize for the bad art but i am. very sick. and tired. and injured :[ i would have done better for u guys but i physically cant ..
requests open! ☆ 3 in inbox ^_^
#:[ i was uh.. i was gonn a do art of mmy headcanons but.. im scared of doing it wrong and id rather just not do it than try and fail ..#iif ur still interested in that .. i can do it im just really fucking scared of doing it wrong somehow#my art#art#kagamine len#vocaloid fanart#drawing len everyday until my preorder arrives#ok chat im off to die#look man i would jhave done better but i was nauseous and sick the ENTIRE tiem and i was very tired#i am still nauseous and sick and tire it hasnt changed#look guys i would have overworked myself like usual but today its too hardddddd waahhhh and i rlly wanted to draw
21 notes
·
View notes
Text
...😭
#i've never had a job in my own field that i've liked as much as i've liked my current one#the semester is ending soon and today i heard my contract will not be renewed bc the person i'm substituting will return to work after all#i've been feeling so tired and a bit poorly after the nokia arena show and i probably should have called in sick today#as i was absolutely useless today#and then after my only class today my students came to me with a gift?? 😭#a pink enamel moomin mug and some chocolate and a paper on which they had written nice things about me + a drawing of a dachshund 😭#and i burst to tears right there in front of them because i was so touched (and also because i'm just really really tired and emotional)#i'm so tired about having to apply for new jobs and having to start all over again#i'm so tired of having to do shitty short-notice substitutions again#i feel like i deserve better than that but on the other hand i fee like life's giving me exactly what i deserve and maybe this is it#i'm dreading the summer because idk if i'll have a job to go to in the autumn#and even if i did find something it won't be like the job i have now#also. it's may day eve and the weather's lovely#and i'm hiding in my apartment with the curtains closed so i won't see all the people going out and having fun with their friends#for me may day eve has never been like that. i've always felt so very excluded from those celebrations#on top of that i got yelled at by a bus driver and i'm the worst friend that ever existed#i'm trying to quit on whining about my sad little life but it gets so lonely#please know i'm not writing this for attention or pity. i know y'all have problems of your own and i'm just being a dramatic crybaby
24 notes
·
View notes
Text
The week has already started and I already wish it was over😔
#negative#Had a not very pleasant experience on the train today#men are the worst sometimes#I'm ok! It was just very uncomfortable#I was hoping I'd be fine but I guess I'm more shaken up about it than I thought I would be#Y'know it's bad when my mother was like “Are you sick or something? Tired?” because I seemed so out of it and unresponsive#And I still got some important assignments to work on but I'm struggling to focus...#Augh! At least I don't have class tomorrow- I don't have to go out#Oh to just lay in Snow's arms. No kissing bc I'm too icked by that rn but just chill there#Or cuddle with my gf Melia...I don't really wanna think of men (other than Snow) rn
15 notes
·
View notes
Text
Cozytober - Day 10 - Cornucopia
#Cozytober#Margot's RF Art#Rune Factory 3#RF3#I actually have drawn Daria more recently than last October-- for one of those prompts I asked for back in March when I got sick--#I just haven't finished it BUT. She is fun to draw I have officially decided#I must admit I don't like prompts that feel very American Thanksgiving-y so I decided to play with a character trope that I like#and that is if you have a character that's an artist you have to one day depict what they draw#So I decided to have fun with my favorite CSP brush [Oil Paint Flat Brush] and draw a colorful cornucopia. MUCH SATURATION#I was so tired when I got home today and this turned out so much better than I was expecting tbh#I'm glad I didn't give up and delay#That's what I do these challenges for-- to prove I can#Rune Factory Daria#RF Daria
29 notes
·
View notes
Text
Just once, I would like to have a good day that isn’t immediately followed by a crash.
Just once I’d like to be able to clean my house without playing the “did I overdo it or was this crash coming anyway” game.
Just once I’d like to get through a weekend without feeling like I’m dragging myself through it by my hair.
Just once I’d like to reach Monday not already exhausted.
Just once.
#hedgehog muses#not handling the chronic illness very well today#sick and tired of being sick and tired#chronic illness#fibromyalgia
20 notes
·
View notes
Text
chronic illness culture is checking out at the dollar store & carrying on a friendly conversation with the cashier while simultaneously opening & dry swallowing two of the aleve you are actively in the process of purchasing
15 notes
·
View notes
Text
ugghhh wintertime sucks!! I'm sad and tired and sad all the time.. I need a nap.. and f/o cuddles.. and another nap..
#ash rambles 💚#negative#part of it is definitely the weather#it's so dark and dreary and i never wanna leave my bed#but also just. my mood akdjajs I'm kinda down in the dumps today#im recovering from being sick which always fucks me up#and i just cant shake this feeling of anxiety..? and i feel kinda a lot like my f/os wouldnt like me or would fall out of love or never see#me as more than a friend and other stuff like that#i.. actually got broken up with yesterday irl!#it wasnt messy. he said that this isnt what he wanted and it was fine and we're back to being pals. i wasnt sad at all in the moment and#i dont think i am now..? it's weird. we were laughing like always literal minutes after having the chat. when we got together we said that#if things domt work out we wanna keep being friends. and we're doing just that. honestly i saw it coming and idek if i LOVE him anymore#what even does love feel like..? regardless I'm not upset or sad at my breakup since i saw it coming and I'm honestly happy he just. Talked#to me about it. we communicated and then three minutes later went back to talking about x.enoblade LMAAOO it was fun!#but it is ridiculous for me to expect to feel NOTHING at no longer being in a relationship. i cant just feel nothing. i dont feel sad per s#just... in my thoughts i guess? I don't think the feeling of my f/os not liking me stems from me being dumped though. i think thats just me#being me sjdjaksj I'm very insecure a lot of the time. i dont think being dumped helpd very much though LMAAAOO#I'm doing okay i promise. and I'll be alright. theres just both a lot and nothing going on at the same time and i feel... idk what i feel.#i hope my f/os love me 😭 i hope that a lot#and honestly i know this community is ass and I'm more than happy in my own corner with my couple of followers but. ngl I've really felt as#though I'm not valued here and all that junk as of late. yeah just.. i think everything is happening at the same time and I'm tired and#i feel like I'm a confused kiddo who doesnt know anything anymore BAHAHAHA#holy shit it just sounds like i need a shower and a nap huh- I'll be alright I'm just. dealing with stuff akdjsks but i also hate to always#bring the mood down like this! i always try my best to be haha silly and all that shit. I'm just gonna try to daydream about f/o cuddles#(and try to convince myself they dont hate me ofc)#oh and. i know i mentioned this but. i hate the weather. so much. I'm sad all the time. November is actually my least favorite month too 😭#I've gotta study a lot today and I'll try to sneak in some k.urohyou and hopefully start watching monster too but yeah i apolgize if#I'm acting off these days ajdjajs I'm very stuck in my own mind these days. not exactly the most fun place to be 😭#delete later#i mean akdjajs i literally started crying the other day because my friend said that my husband (k.yohei) loves me ajdkahdb come on ash..
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
Talking to my sister can be one of the most aggravating experiences
#just allowing myself a few moments of self-pity today#because i'm a little overstimulated/sick of people talking AT me#i have begun to notice that i'm never asked anything... not a single thing. no questions about my life or interests or how school is going#no questions about my partner or our anniversary and no acknowledgement of the big haircut i just got#no questions about my BIL's wedding. none about my health.#every day it's just people talking AT me. kind of tired at the moment...#and this is made worse by my sister's holier-than-thou attitude about literally the smallest and most insignificant things#like washing clothes? and cooking rice?? idk she talks like a housewife now.#and i get to listen to her complain about her 35 year old boyfriend and not say ONE kind thing for 2 hours straight#not a single question for me. not a single nice thing. and i'm talked over constantly#it's not like i don't raise my voice or speak my mind lol#it's just that. between my family and my partner's family. it feels like no one knows just how smart i am and how much fun i can be.#my partner is perfect in so many ways. my best friend and the kindest and most compassionate person i know.#but i really could brag and boast like my sister does over absolutely nothing. because i have actual achievements. but i don't#because who does that lol. fucking annoying and rude people.#maybe my family just thinks i'm okay and so they never ask me anything or call me. ever.#but see.... i don't talk to them because i want advice or help or money. i talk to them because they're my family#and i would very much like to feel cherished and loved by them#/ end angst and self-pity boo hoo
22 notes
·
View notes
Note
Went over to blea74s page and she did bad mouth you with capt about being awful kids //
Anon you are an awful kid! I didn’t see them saying about Books blog.
Thanks, N🫶nnie. For clarifying.
But again, so tired of all this back and forth. And I can't bring myself to care about what she and others did or didn't say.
Damned if I do, damned if I don't... Just wish it didn't come with drama...
#An🫶n asks#An🫶n to An🫶n#booky reacts#booky answers#chris evans#chris evans fandom#Team Chris#special shout-out to the very first Anon to call me a racist which lead me to where I am today#a messy Fandom that's a shell of what it once was...#don't even know if I should post fics anymore if people are gonna say that “I'm obsessed and need mental help” because I write fics#scenarios that live in my head#I'm just sick and tired of all the drama#something that comes with being a part of this Fandom#man I need to rejoin the more obscure Fandoms again 😅#at least they aren't toxic
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
i fear i cannot mentally or emotionally handle being conscious much longer so im gonna take a melatonin and hope to god it works enough to make me pass out by 8:30 tbh
#i. have gone through the full spectrum of human emotions today methinks (not including joy or happiness or any of the like.. naturally)#i am so exhausted and feeling deeply deeply fucking hopeless#ive spent so much of my life feeling miserable and hopeless but holy fucking shit none of that even remotely came close to the amount#of sheer hopelessness and despair that im feeling today#gneuinely. at a loss for ways to make myself or anyone else feel better#like. well at least we're alive! bitch i dont think i want to be anymore. and furthermore for a LOT of people NOT FOR MUCH LONGER probably#at least we have friends/family/community! yes and that means i have that many more people to be absolutely terrified for on top of myself#we've been through this once we can do it again! I WANT MY LIFE TO BE ABOUT MORE THAN JUST GETTING THROUGH#JESUS CHRIST LIKE#by the time the next election comes i will be 27#meaning i will have spent the majority of my teens AND 20s fearing this stupid fucking man and his stupid fucking morally bankrupt follower#im so sick#im so tired#i have to stay alive but for what??? for climate change to make everything exponentially worse in the next 10-15 years??#for society and humanity as we know it to AT the very LEAST begin to collapse in front of my very eyes??#anyway.#like... i just...#thank god i have ppl in my life rn who care about me bc they are essentially singlehandedly keeping me alive at this point#at the end of all of it even though i can do this song and dance all day and be like "whats the point of living? why shouldnt i k myself#and the answer is that the people i love would be sad. the people i love love me too and they would never be the same.#and especially with how much a lot of them have done for me. i owe it to them to at least Try to give myself the best shot i can#us politics#election 2024#kamala harris#2024 election#uspol
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
bf says ive been going thru it and doing really well at that. bursts into tears.
#im like a toddler that needs a nap except ive badly needed a nap every minute of every day for a week because covid#and im trying really hard#im actually really okay. i don't have my first math test for another week and two days and if i did terrible on#the bio test today my lowest test grade gets dropped and it's okay. it's okay. it's okay.#i am recovering and working and in a class that is very hard for me and i miss simon so bad. i was too tired to drive last weekend#and couldn't go the one prior to that bc covid obviously#it's okay it's okay it's okay#also im getting the depo provera shot in november. i'm fully over it#also the fatigue is getting better by the day. it's okay. it's okay#getting the shot. seeing si on friday. my math prof is very kind and understands that i'm struggling and wants to help. fatigue is getting#better. turns out i don't have work tomorrow. im gonna play valo w seity sometime soon that will be SO fun.#new comfy desk chair. im gonna put something on and work thru my math hw and submit questions without feeling bad about it#it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay. im being sooo brave.#he also said it's insane that i've had to work this week because i'm very much still symptomatic. it got me really good this time#the initial sickness wasn't nearly as severe as the last time i had covid but this one is more drawn out#im still having sinus symptoms/pain on top of the fatigue. cried in my car both days that i worked 👍 it's okay. it's okay
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
mmmmrrrrggghhhhhhh slow day
#catfish speaks#i did not get nearly half the things i wanted to accomplish done#part of it is cos i need more fabric for the bottom half of this coat#and that's not a hard find but it does mean i have to wait until nexy week when i get paid to buy it#and so i couldn't do rhe bottom but tbh the top half has SO much to it#and then i just. took forever to get anything done#also got groceries today which probably didn't help#but fuck i did not accomplish very much#and im scared im going to be crunching#i haven't even gotten halfway on the owlbear#and in my head i can whiz through all the steps and figure it out easily but oh boy#actually doing it is. different#i am just. very tired#god i want to get these cosplays done so badly#and ideally not have to crunch too hard#hrghhhh we will see#have a cup of tea and rest#then get back to what i can do today#and hey i have a lot of sick leave. i could. take a day off to jusy try and catch up#we'll see.#the good thing is thay i do currently have the leave to go to pax and will be able to get more from here on#so im good there#it's organised its just a bit tight#and of course im very tired this week and have a million things on so naturally i agree to go to a party on friday#im excited but aurhjisjajai man i love cramming my schedule don't i#reminds me i need to finish that present
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
I have made so much soap and now my brain hurts
#i think it's all the smells...... there's too many smells.#...#I've made like 24 smells today and my kitchen now makes me feel like my head is gonna explode#i might go nap this headache off while this batch solidifies and then maybe get back to it#i wanted to go through and use up the last of my soap base because i was sick of it sitting in my craft supplies doing nothing#but i severely underestimated how much i had. I've made so much fucking soap and there's still more soap base to use#i think there's maybe. maybe enough for 4 or 5 more bars. so maybe after a nap i can finish it off.......#i have been making soap since about 5 am. with a little bit of cult of the lamb while i waited for the batches to cool#i am very tired#ough#soap.... i have so much soap.........
2 notes
·
View notes