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#shut up marv
holalinkkk · 30 days
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I think the part that hurt me the most was the “Am I not…like, fucking you good enough because I can… I can always do better-!” Like Blitzø really thinks he’s never good enough for the people he loves and it literally breaks my heart because Stolas’s love is RIGHT THERE but how can Blitzø even begin to openly reciprocate when he hates himself this much 😭😭😭 I’m not okay y’all
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panxramic · 4 months
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I like the different interpretations of Tallulah’s hair color people have been sending me.
Her hair didn’t turn black JUST bc of q!Missa. It turned black because it’s the color of the wither roses her papa likes, it turned black because it matches the feathers on the back of q!Phil’s wings, her hair turned black because it’s the same shade as the crows that flock their home. Tallulah’s hair turned black because death is very much a part of her every day life. It turned black because she *likes* it. Tallulah’s hair is black because it resembles her whole life and the people she loves.
I like to refrain from attributing certain things about Tallulah solely to one person because people just end up turning her into an extension of others. Especially when people attribute certain features of hers to someone she hasn’t talked to in months and she has never seen as a father.
They already did it to her once before, and I’d hate to see it be done to her again. She’s more than that. She always has been.
Tallulah’s journey with self discovery and finding her place in the world has been a rollercoaster to watch unfold. She’s gone through so much to prove herself, she’s fought hard to show the world who she is and who she isn’t. She’s gotten lost in promises and old memories. Tallulah has struggled with her identity as it has always been heavily tied to family, and family on the island is important and complicated.
She’s come to a place where she finally feels comfortable. She finally feels like she belongs in this family and now she can continue that path of self discovery. Because there’s no greater feeling than that freedom of being able to decide who you are. Of being in such a comfortable spot in which she can explore different ways to express herself.
I don’t think this necessarily has been a HUGE issue, but it’s definitely one that has been in the foreground for a while and an added effect of her struggles in finding a place on the island. Because finding that place is also a part of WHO she is, it’s part of her identity.
I remember her getting upset that she was seen as an extension of him for months. It was all anybody would ever bring up around her. She was the egg that was left behind, she was the egg that didn’t have a father. She was the egg that was abandoned again and again. And it was hard trying to combat that, bc how do you work around something that is genuinely affecting you to your core? Something that felt so defining in your life?
Well I think she’s come far in showing that she’s more than that. That she’s not just the sad traumatized egg that was abandoned. She’s grown a lot, she’s found a new place. There’s still sore spots sure. She didn’t like being called the “trauma egg” because again, it’s something she’s been trying to move past from. She’s more than just her trauma, she’s more than the people and the things that have hurt her.
I think that yes her past is important, everything she’s gone through has molded her into the egg that she is. But she’s not just her past. Her past doesn’t control her, not like it used to at least. It’s important that she’s reinventing herself in a way. Because she’s changed a lot, but she’s still Tallulah. Not the same one we saw at the start, but it’s still her. And at this point in time she’s more herself than she ever has been.
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Day 118.
Soooo... hi. Happy Dracula Eve. To celebrate Dracula Season '24, I decided to give myself two weeks to arrange and learn to play Annie Lennox' "Love Song for A Vampire" on violin. With two violin parts. This is my first time attempting to duet myself and my mic is a bit potato. Also, this will probably not be up forever because Hollywood Lawyers Are Scary and I don't want that smoke.
I wanted to make sure this was up at the beginning of Dracula season because no one's going to be feeling generous towards Coppola's adaptation by the time November rolls around, LOL.
(Given that this is patched and has track doubling and reverb and shit it should not be taken as an honest benchmark of where I'm at right now. I just wanted to put something a little more okay-ish up as a thank-you to my long-suffering moots who have been dealing with nearly four months of me refusing to shut up about re-learning the violin.)
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osdove · 2 years
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another azulaang sneak peak, because i just wrote like 3 pages of pure aang and azula dialogue and this exchange is killing me please look:
“I know.” Azula sighed, reaching out to grab his hand—the same hand that he had held just moments before.  The ball dropped, rolling off Appa’s fur and landing on the grass.  One kid picked it up. “But they called me an egg custard tart when I refused at first.  I couldn’t allow myself to be slandered like that.”
Her hands were warm as always.  His heart beat rapidly in his chest, a pink blush forming on his cheeks as he stared straight into her eyes. “Would you have defended my honour like that?”
“No.  I know you’d love to be called an egg custard tart.”
He smiled proudly at her, eyes glistening with unshed tears. “You know me so well.”
“Of course.  You are my fiancee, after all.  My egg custard tart.”
“My flaming mochi.”
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olsenmyolsen · 6 months
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This Is Me Trying - One - (A Y/N Parker Spider-Woman X Kate Bishop Story)
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masterlist
Summary: The Winter semester is challenging as you fall behind on exams and essays all while an old threat emerges.
Word Count: 3.3K
Content: College stress, cutie Kate Bishop
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You, Y/N Parker, loved Christmas time.
You loved how it changed the city from a smelly concrete jungle into a smelly concrete jungle but with snow!
Lights went up with trees covered in decorations. Lattes got better, and so did the cookies.
The air got colder, and sometimes the people got warmer. Whether it was buying things for strangers or for a lifelong friend. Random acts of kindness increased, but on the flip side, so did the rate of crime.
Plus, swinging in the cold was awful, but with some insulation in the suit, it helped.
All of this to say you still loved this time of the year.
"You know, since you love it so much, how about you let me go? You know, like you said, kindness of strangers and all that!"
You looked at the guy webbed to a pole who just mugged a woman coming home from work and tilted your head.
"You know what you're right. Tis the season!" The man nodded as you took a few steps closer. "However, on second thought!" The man's eyes widened before you webbed his mouth shut.
"Marv, how many times are we gonna do this, buddy?" You patted the man's head as the sirens were approaching.
"Happy Holidays!" You yelled as you swung up to the nearby rooftop, looking for the woman whose purse was in your hand.
As you stay perched on the corner, your phone starts to ring. It was Peter—your best friend and brother. You debated whether to answer it or not, but eventually, you gave in and pressed the side of your mask.
"Hey man, what's up?"
"Not much... I know it's late, but I- I was just wondering if you started on Dr. Ohnn's paper yet? I'm completely lost. H-He knows we're sophomores, right?!"
You chuckled and sighed.
You haven't started on the paper yet.
"Sorry, Pete. I've been busy..." You heard Peter let out a disappointed sigh.
"Y/N... you're out, aren't you?" You felt bad. For the last couple of weeks, Peters has been asking you to take it easy with your after-school duties due to the number of exams these previous few weeks have had and, as mentioned before, the crime rate, but you haven't. If anything, you tacked on more. "Y/N, you know how dangerous I still think this is."
You rolled your eyes. "Yes, Peter, I know, but-" Before you could finish, you saw a person jump from one rooftop to another two blocks down from you. "Hey Pete, I gotta go..."
"Wait Y/N... Y/N!"
The line went dead as you tapped the side of your mask and took off, swinging purse in hand to the stranger on the rooftop.
As you front-flipped from your webbed, you laughed. "Well, if it isn't the purple bird!" You said when you got up from your landing pose, scaring the crap out of the archer. He jumped and drew his bow on you before realizing who it was.
With an exaggerated groan, he withdrew his weapon.
"What do you want, Spider!?" He sounded annoyed. You put your hands over your heart. Purse still in hand. "Ouch! I just wanted to check up on the man who destroyed 30 Rock last year."
Clint Barton rolled his eyes.
"It was a tree and a skating rink. Get over it." You raised your hand and mocked the archer as you stepped onto the roof's ledge.
"Where's the youngster?" You asked switching topics. Clint raised an eyebrow. "What are you spying on me now?" You put your hands up. "As if! Just curious. Making conversation. It's not my fault you two happen to fall into my patrol area."
Clint looked at you. "Your patrol area?" You nodded. "It's called New York. Ever heard of it?" Clint rolled his eyes again. "You can be a pain in the ass sometimes, you know that."
"I've been told."
"By friends?" You laughed. "No by enemies. Wait..? Why did you hear something?"
Clint cracked a smile. "Maybe." He hadn't, but he enjoyed this back-and-forth you two played. Like his protege, it was nice to have someone around who reminded him of the heroes of the past. People that brought hope for the future.
"So is that purse yours or?" Clint looked up from his binoculars at you. "No. It's not my color." When Clint didn't laugh, you continued. "Lady got mugged, and I don't know where to find her."
Clint looked from the purse to you and did it two more times. "What?" You asked when no words were spoken. Clint huffed. "You have her purse. It probably has her ID." You tilted your head before your eyes got wide. "Oh! Her address!"
Clint nodded yes and grumbled about you before looking into his binoculars again.
"Thanks, bird man!" You said as you looked at the address. It wasn't far. "Same time tomorrow?" You asked as you twhiped away.
Clint sent you a thumbs-up even though he wasn't paying attention. But you didn't know that. You saw a thumbs up and smiled.
You were getting through to the old man.
As you twhiped to the woman's place to return her purse, a bright-eyed Kate Bishop saw you.
"It's the Spider!" She very awkwardly whispered to no one else before running to the building; she had no idea you had just left from.
And when she got to the top: "Clint!" She shouted, making the archer jump before realizing who it was. "What!?" He said, looking at her as she smiled with excitement. "The spider! I just saw her!" He nodded like a dad would. "And?" He said. "And! And! And isn't that cool!" Clint shrugged. "I guess. She was here. She actually asked about you." Clint held in a smile.
It was a not-so-secret that Kate had a slight crush/admiration for the web-slinging hero.
"And!?" Kate took the binoculars from Clint and awaited his answer. "And... that was it. Nothing else. She joked around. I rolled my eyes. That was it."
Kate was going to press for my information, but Clint was useless when it came to details so mundane.
"Ugh. Fine. Here." Kate tried to hand the binoculars back, but Clint shook his head. "Look and tell me what you see." Kate looked through them and into the window of a known wheelman. "Tracksuits." She said, making Clint nod.
"See the guy with the awful chops?" Kate shifted her focus to a guy with bad facial hair. "Yeah."
"Look past him on the wall." Kate did just that and smiled. "I thought people only drew on blueprints in the movies?!"
"Our guys must watch a lot of movies," Clint said as he chuckled.
Kate put the binoculars down and looked at Clint. "After last year, do you still think Kingpin and these guys are connected? I mean..." Kate made a gesture that said, "really, these guys??" while pointing in the direction of the Tracksuits.
Clint shrugged. "I think it's best to believe they're connected than to not. Plus.. drugs and money still need to be run for guys like Kingpin. Any disposable person that's easy to pay is like Christmas to these guys."
Kate thought about it and nodded as she looked through the binoculars again. "Remember when we destroyed 30 rock."
Clint groans and closes his eyes. "It was a tree and an ice rink. Not the whole city!"
While Kate was busy trying to figure out what annoyed Clint and what Kingpin was planning next, you were busy climbing into your dorm through the window.
You tore your mask off as your feet landed on the floor. You ran your covered hand through your freshly shortened hair and took a deep breath before frowning. You sniffed the air before lifting your suit close to your nose. "Ah, man.."
The city really got to it tonight.
You tossed your mask into the hamper in your closet as you started wrangling out of your suit. You've been meaning to make adjustments to your suit since your arm muscle has only grown, but you hadn't, which left it a bit tight to get out of sometimes.
Lucky for you, you never had people drop by unannounced, so you could always take your time-
"Y/N is that you- OH MY GOD!"
You turned towards the voice of your brother as the top half of your suit fell, showing off you in your black sports bra and toned abdomen.
"Peter!" You yelled as he threw his hands over his eyes. "I didn't know. I'm sorry!" He shouted as he went to run out the door but hit your wall instead, causing him to fall to the floor, knocked out.
An hour later, as you moved your clothes from the wash to the dryer, Peter woke up. And after scolding him about not knocking, you and him got to work on Dr. Ohnn's paper.
But with your exhausted brain and body. Plus Peter's... mild concussion, you two didn't get far. So, just as you were about to suggest calling it for the night, your roommate came home.
Where she was or who she was with was always a mystery to you.
"Hey, losers!" Michelle-Jones, aka MJ, greeted you and Peter as she ran to grab the TV remote sitting on the table. She clicked it on and found the local news channel. "MJ, what are you-" She held up a finger and shushed your brother. "Look!" She pointed to the screen as a reporter was standing in front of a run-down apartment building that was on fire. "It's the fifth one this month!" MJ stated. "Everything thinks I'm crazy, but I know insurance fraud when I see it."
You and Peter weren't sure how to continue.
"Okay..." You started. "What's your point?" You questioned, hoping your roommate and friend was going somewhere with this. "Obviously, someone is doing something very illegal."
"Okay..." Peter said. "What can we do about it?"
"We can't do anything about it. But someone here can." MJ started motioning her head towards you, making you sigh. "MJ. I've told you multiple times. The pictures were a summer thing. I don't take their pictures anymore!" MJ rolled her eyes. Clearly not believing you. "Whatever you say..." She narrowed her eyes at you. "Spider!"
Before you could argue back, MJ got up and went to the fridge before taking a box of pizza to her room. "I'm gonna crash. Night."
"I brought that pizza..." Peter quietly said as you collapsed onto the couch. "You were gonna give it to her anyways." You turn your head to Peter. "Was not!" He defends, but you see through him. "You've had a crush on her for the last year, so please let's be honest here."
Peter closed his mouth and then said: "You're the one not being honest with her."
"Dude."
"Sorry," Peter mumbled. "It's just she's going to find out on her own if you don't tell her." He whispered. You nodded. "I know. I know. But you and I both know that the fewer people that know, the less I have to worry about. The less people get hurt."
Peter wore a sad smile on his face. "You're right. I.. I just hate lying to her."
You looked at Peter as he brought his knees close to his chest on the other end of the couch. "I'm sorry, Pete." He nodded. He knew it was easier for you to do this if the less people knew about your other life, but he wasn't sure how much longer he could lie to MJ.
The following morning, after Peter returned to his dorm, you woke up late.
Apparently, in your sleepy daze, you hit 730 into your calculator app and not your alarm clock application. On top of that, you forgot to charge your phone, so as you panicked to get ready for the day, you quickly put in the cable to charge.
You grabbed your closest pair of jeans and threw on your school sweater, all while grabbing the textbooks scattered on your desk.
You ran into the kitchen and grabbed your last pair of pop tarts before heading to the door and slipping on your vans. You zipped up your bag and bolted out the door.
However, you immediately reentered your dorm, ran into your room, snatching your glasses and phone, now on 16%.
_
The lecture hall was full by the time you entered. The booming of the door attracted the attention of everyone.
Your brother included. Your eyes found his, and he gave you a weak smile as you sat at the first seat you could find.
When you pulled out your textbook and looked up, you saw Dr. Connors sigh before he continued speaking. "As I was saying. Yes, just because the holidays are upon us doesn't mean we won't have our test on Friday. I want something fun to grade over the break, people." He gave an awkward chuckle that few students, including you, gave back. "Oh, and don't forget. Your papers on physics are still due by the end of the school year. If you've forgotten... well, there's a reason I'm tenured, and this class lasts all year." He smiled and proceeded to dismiss everybody.
Everybody but you.
"Y/N Parker. A moment."
You knew it was coming, but you kept your head up high. You look to Peter, and he nods. He'd see you after class.
"Dr. Connors, look, I'm sorry about being late-"
"Late?" He cut you off. "You missed the whole dang class." You sighed and adjusted the bag around your shoulder. "Look..." Dr. Connors started. "You're a bright student. I've seen it firsthand, but lately... it's like you're not even here. Your grades have been steadily declining. You always appear exhausted."
You nodded. "I'm trying. I wanna be here!"
"Then be here." He said before he sighed. "You still haven't told me what your physics paper is on."
You perked up at that. "I plan on doing it about fusion and Dr. Otto Octavius."
Dr. Connors sighs. "Well, planning is not a major at this university." He walks past you and goes to the giant board in the middle of the room. He then stops. "Octavius is a friend of mine. Better do your research, Parker." You nod. "I'd really hate to see you fail."
"I don't want to, sir." You say, making Connors look at you with a sad smile on his face. "I can pass along your information to Octavius. Whether he contacts you or not is up to him. After that..." He looks at you. "It's up to you, Parker."
When you exited the lecture hall, you found Peter talking to your mutual friend Ned. The closer you got, the more you saw Peter panic and tell Ned to "shut up."
"What's going on?" Peter shook his head as if nothing was wrong. You looked to Ned, who sheepishly looked away. "Ned." You drug his name out.
Ned took one look at you and broke. "I think I might know about the fires around the city!" He smiled and looked excited. It paid to have Ned be the guy in the chair.
You looked at Peter. "You didn't want him to tell me?" Peter sighed. "Y/N, you have so much going on already we don't need you." He gestures with his hand as if he was shooting a web. "Right now. Besides, you haven't even started on your essay, and you just got in trouble with Connors!"
Before you could defend your lack of action, you get interrupted.
"Hey guys!"
Immediately, your stress melted away as you looked down at Kate Bishop. Captain of the Archery Team. Your friend and study partner.
Oh, and your crush.
Katherine Elizabeth Bishop.
"Hey Kate!" You said a little too excitedly, something that everyone caught on to. Thankfully, they chose not to make a big deal out of it. "Hey, Y/N." She looked at you and smiled.
There goes the butterflies.
"So what are you three amigos talking about?" She bounced on her heels as she looked away from you and to the other two. "Oh, nothing!" Peter said. "I don't think you're allowed to say that?" Ned added with a confused face.
"Doesn't sound like nothing," Kate said, making Peter glance at you. "Sounds like Y/N is getting in trouble with Connors." She replied as she turned to you with a teasing smile. "Let me guess..." She made a thinking face. "Too busy studying for our History test?"
History test!! Oh crap, that is Friday!
"Okay, based on the look I just gained, you forgot." You nodded. Kate made a hmm noise but kept her head towards you as she thought.
"Shit," Ned spoke up. "Peter, we gotta go, or we'll be late!" Peter looked at his watch and came to the same conclusion. "Gotta go! See you, Y/N! Bye, Kate!" Peter and Ned took off running down the hall and out the doors before they sprinted across the courtyard.
"What class do they have?" Kate asked.
"Robotics."
"Sounds about right." She said. "We should probably get going." Kate smiled and gestured her head in the general direction of your History class with Kate. "Don't worry about the test," Kate said as you two walked side by side. "You always do just fine." You shrugged her compliment off.
Kate noticed. "But I was thinking if you want..." You looked at Kate and noticed her fingers interlocking with one another. "Maybe you could come to my dorm to study some more. Besides, I still need help on the laws and how they changed once the Sokovian Accords were ratified."
You and Kate had always hung out in mutual gatherings and settings. You two were good friends, but you had never been to her dorm.
On top of that. Alone.
You suddenly felt very warm and wary of your every move.
"That sounds great!" You managed to say. "When were you thinking?"
Kate thought. If it were up to her, you'd come over tonight, but Kate wasn't sure what her roommate Cassie was doing. Plus, she and Clint had a hot new lead to follow up on. "Ummm, is it cool if I text you?"
You nodded. "Sounds great." You smiled widely and pushed the door to your History class open. Letting Kate walk in first. You and Kate walked to your seats and sat beside one another.
"Shit." You heard Kate mumble when she opened her bag. "You okay?" You asked. "Uh yeah.." She bit her lip. A habit you noticed that she only got when she was embarrassed. "What's wrong?" You asked when you tore your eyes away from her chewed-on pink lips.
Kate sighed when her lips parted. "I forgot my textbook. I thought I packed after Clint- Clint-on Clinton and I got back from Archery, but I guess I didn't." Kate didn't look your way.
She was now warm and aware of every move she made.
"Hey, I surprisingly remembered mine." You pulled yours out. "We can share." You moved it in between the two of you. "Really?" She charmingly lifted her eyebrows. "Really." You said.
Kate let out a little cheer and wrapped an arm around you. "You're a lifesaver!"
If only she knew.
Kate didn't remove her arm from around you as quick as she usually would have; instead, you could feel her hand slide up your muscles to your shoulder.
Kate had been noticing your muscle growth as of late but didn't know where it came from...
Eventually, Kate removed her touch from you.
Yet you still felt her.
"It's no big deal." You said about sharing the textbook. But you and Kate both knew that based on your actions recently, you remembering to bring your book or not falling asleep in class was a miracle.
This was Kate's first time forgetting a book, and she could sense Clint's disappointed sigh.
Kate smiled as she watched your fingers turn the corners of the page in the textbook. Her eyes lifted to your fingers, to your sweater, and up to your face. She watched your side profile as you silently read a paragraph to yourself. She only stopped when you looked her way and hid a smile when you pushed up your glasses. "What's up?" You quietly asked.
"Do you want to come to my archery practice tomorrow?" Kate whispered back.
Kate wasn't sure what you had going on in your life. You and her were close but not close, like with Peter, Ned, and MJ. So she never pushed.
Plus, she liked you and didn't want to ruin what you two might have.
But when you said, "Yeah! That sounds awesome!" Like a dork, Kate smiled.
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dividers by @/benkeibear
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(part 5 of November Paramedic; part 4 is here and the AO3 version is here.)
Liquid sound courses through Eddie's body. His fingers dance over Sweetheart's strings, hitting every note perfectly. Behind him, Gareth is going at the drums like a beast while Jeff and Marv have gravitated together, now playing back-to-back. In front of him, a wall of people is pogoing, restricted by The Behemoth's 'no moshing policy'. When he launches into the solo, their headbanging turns so vicious they're but a wild sea of hair with haphazard devil horns sticking up. Solo over, he grabs the mic to roar the outro lyrics.
The audience screams; Eddie's ears ring. His veins hold more adrenaline than blood and his life has never been better.
"Thank you! You've been glorious tonight!" He sweeps his sweat-soaked hair from his face and winks at a cluster of girls in the front row. "We're Corroded Coffin and you'll see us here again soon. For now, thank you and good night!"
On his way off the stage, he catches one of the girls' hand and drops a kiss on her palm. She beams, face pink, as her friends shriek.
It's not his favorite thing about performing. He likes playing on stage because of the release, because of the building nervosity that erupts with the music. He likes it because it's fun. But the electricity between him and the crowd? The charged looks of pure want from men and women alike?
It doesn't make it worse. He's not burdened by being desired.
They congratulate each other outside as they deposit their guitars and few pieces of personal equipment in Eddie's van. Gareth is especially bouncy, telling Eddie over and over how he was great, he was on fire, he was invincible. Eddie would've questioned the post-show hype if he hadn't immediately demanded they go back inside for drinks; if Gareth thinks he can flatter himself into a free round, he's correct.
After the fresh June night, the air inside The Behemoth is stiflingly hot. It plus the hum of the patrons leave a cloying buzz in the back of his head. He might only stay for the one round before going home. Possibly two if those front-row ladies decide to pay; they're eyeing him right now. Sure, they're not Eddie's type, but that's what the other guys are there for.
Except when the women approach, Gareth shuts them off by pulling Marv in between them and steering Eddie in the opposite direction. Pushing Eddie forward, seemingly uncaring if Jeff and Marv keep up, he goes on his tip toes and hops every other step to peer above the crowd.
"Are you looking for someone?" Eddie asks.
"Noo, I just thought I saw someone at the bar…"
"Yeah, that means you're looking for someone, dipshit. Who is it?"
"It's… Uh…" Gareth says inattentively, scanning the bar area.
A large hand clamps around Eddie's shoulder, turning him around. He promptly swallows his tongue.
"Dude, you were great!" Steve says, smiling so big it could sustain a small country with power for the winter.
His hair is fluffy tonight, lying in a soft swoop. He's wearing a charcoal Henley, sleeves rolled to his elbows, tufts of chest hair peeking out from between the undone buttons. And he's got glasses on. Fucking glasses. Thin wireframes, an elegant complement to his beautiful face and delicate contrast to his hunky everything else.
Eddie's reply is strangled nonsense that drowns in Gareth's shouted, "Hey! You made it!"
"Yeah, man! Thanks for the invite!" Steve says, extending his hand for a shake.
"Anytime, dude! S'great to see you," Gareth replies, slapping and grabbing Steve's hand in a perfectly executed man-shake. Like they're a pair of fucking frat bros.
But that isn't the important part. No, the important part here is the word 'invite'. Who, when, where, and above all what the fuck??
"We loved it!" Robin says from half behind Steve. Because of course she's also here, wearing a patterned blazer that should clash with her differently patterned button down, yet doesn't. She continues gushing about the performance as Steve nods along and the rest of the band interject their gratitude whenever she pauses for breath for longer than a second. Eddie is the only one who hasn't said a peep.
He needs to fucking peep.
"Glasses!"
His exclamation has the others turn and stare so fast their necks snap. He ignores Gareth's snicker, cheeks burning. One of these days he will run into Steve without acting like a fool, but not today.
"What?" Steve says, his already huge eyes magnified by the glass. Damn, his lashes are long and dark.
"Y-You got glasses. I didn't know that."
Steve's brows jump, as if he forgot he's wearing them. He briefly goes cross-eyed as he tries to look at the spectacles resting on his nose. Then he lets out a giggle that's so cute it hurts.
"Oh, yeah. I usually wear contacts, but they expired and the new ones haven't arrived yet." He scratches beneath his eye, pushing the glasses askew. "I'd just wear the expired ones, but…"
"No!" Robin snaps. "It's bad for your eyes!"
"Yeah."
"You need to take care of yourself!"
Steve levels her with an unimpressed look, cocked eyebrow and pursed, plush lips included. "That's rich coming from someone who stopped eating halfway through an Alfred Hitchcock marathon because she didn't want to pause Saboteur to go grocery shopping."
Robin puts a scandalized hand to her chest. "I'm a linguist, not a medic. I can do whatever I want."
"That's not-"
"Anyway!" She smiles at Eddie and the guys. "You rocked. We had a blast. Steve even danced."
"That wasn't dancing. I was keeping you from faceplanting when you tripped over your own feet."
"Steve, go buy us drinks," Robin says.
"Why me?"
"They brought the entertainment; we'll bring the refreshments. And I'm broke. So chop-chop!"
She claps twice an inch from his nose tip. Steve rolls his eyes, but obliges, striding off toward the bar. Robin emits a witchlike cackle at getting her way.
Eddie elbows Gareth in the ribs hard, gritting out, "You invited them, huh?"
Gareth grins impishly even as he rubs the most certainly bruising spot. However, Robin's villainous glee melts away; she frowns.
"Is that a problem?" she asks.
Shit.
"Oh, no, no!" he says.
"Never!" Gareth shouts.
"New faces in the audience is always a cause for celebration," Marv says.
"He just didn't expect to see you, is all." Jeff steps between Eddie and Robin, wearing a disarming smile. "Gareth didn't tell any of us we had special guests waiting, but it's great to have you here. I'm Jeff."
Robin hums and appraises them with suspicion, eyes lingering on Eddie. Then she smiles; it would've been pleasant if it wasn't so sharp.
"Let's grab a table," she says.
They pick one in the quieter part of the bar. The booths don't fit more than four people, five if you're determined, but they solve it by having Gareth perch on the adjacent window ledge and by Robin sitting on Steve's lap.
It's first when Robin asks for details about the band that Eddie realizes how golden the opportunity is. The previous times he's met Steve, he's been at a disadvantage. Injured, caught by surprise, distracted by tight jeans or sweat rolling down necks. And yeah, he was surprised today, too. And he won't claim that it's easy to focus whenever Steve reaches for his glass, exposed forearm flexing with the movement.
Nevertheless, this is Eddie's turf. This is his stage. Here, he is king. And he will hold court like his life depends on it.
He talks about the band. He talks about their influences, about guitars, about the lyrics he writes. Robin participates in the conversation by making connections to punk music, but Steve only listens, eyes darting between them all like it's a five-way ping pong match and his attention is the ball. But mostly, he's in Eddie's palm, staring like only he has the answers. Fuck, like he is the answer.
It's enough to give a guy a god complex. The person who was created to be looked at is now looking at him.
It makes him bolder. Makes him touch Steve more, touch him longer. Close the distance between them when he speaks and zeros in on Steve's lips when he replies. And Steve… responds? He thinks? It's difficult to tell, because Steve's reciprocal touches are restricted by the lapful of Robin, and he seems to have a habit of looking at everyone's mouth when they talk. The boys appear optimistic, though, sending him encouraging signals from across the table and the window. He'll just have to use it as fuel and keep on trucking.
Somewhere along the way they move on to D&D. Steve remains enrapt by Eddie's every word, hanging on to the golden threads he spins. His only actual contribution comes at the end, asking if their game has space for one more. Eddie’s pulse jumps in his throat.
"Methinks we do." He leans back, exposing his neck, while giving Steve his best bedroom eyes from above the rim of his glass. "Why, you interested?"
"Not me," Steve says; Eddie barely has the willpower to smack his head against the table with disappointment. "But Lucas plays. Or he used to. His… what's the term? His group?"
"Party," Jeff says.
"Party. They're scattered all over the world now. I think he misses it."
"He hasn't said anything about it, but…" Robin trails off. Steve jostles her.
"You never talk about band, but you miss the trumpet like hell, don't you?"
"Ugh, I dooooooo!" she says, kicking her legs.
"We can bring him aboard and see how he fits," Eddie says. "If he so wishes."
Steve smiles like Eddie just promised Lucas a kidney. "Thanks."
Eddie gulps a large mouthful of beer to wet his drying mouth. "Anything for you."
They leave soon after that for food. Gareth especially needs it, starting to become tipsy on his stomach of nothing but beer. Although, outside, it becomes clear he passed 'tipsy' a while back when he climbs onto Jeff's back and yells, "Race!"
Jeff laughs as he hikes Gareth farther up. Robin glances at Steve, then spins away and mounts Marv's back instead.
"I promise I'm lighter than I look," she says.
"You look as light as your namesake," Marv says; she gently smacks his shoulder.
"Don't flatter me; I'm immune."
Gareth, holding Jeff’s hoodie like it's a horse's reins, points to the 7-Eleven sign glowing faintly in the distance. "Onward!"
Marv whinnies realistically enough for Robin to guffaw, and then they're off, their shoes clomping against the pavement and they howling with laughter. Still by the bar, Eddie and Steve share a giggle before following suit at a slower pace.
"Ah, youngsters," Eddie says dreamily.
Steve knocks their shoulders together. "You're not that much older."
"Well… Gareth's turning 21 and I'm 25, so a bit?"
"I'm also the oldest in my friend group." Steve shrugs. "It happens."
Gravel crunch beneath their soles. The air is cool and the sky is yellow with light pollution. Indianapolis is alive and full of noise, but their bubble has space for only them to walk side by side, close enough to touch but not doing so. They have an approximate ten-minute walk until they reach the convenience store. Unless the others return to them, that's ten minutes alone.
Eddie must use them wisely.
"So… how long have you been a paramedic?"
"Oh, um." Steve scratches his neck. "It's been almost four years. I'd actually been certified for less than a year when I got asked to be in that calendar. Not even a year in and I'm supposed to represent paramedics as a whole." He chuckles, mumbling, "That was fun."
"Did you make anything from it?"
"No. Every cent went to charity. Can't remember the name of it, but they provide vaccines to children in developing countries. Measles, polio, hepatitis, tetanus. That sort of stuff."
"Is this your childhood dream then?"
"Nah. I didn't want to be anything when I was a kid. When teachers asked what we wanted to be when we grew up I just said I wanted to be like my dad. He's the CEO of a huge electronics company. Mom is a socialite and philanthropist. They wanted me to inherit the company, but I…" Steve pulls a sigh from deep in his chest, throwing his head back to watch the starless sky. "I was a meathead jock. More interested in being keg king than keeping up my grades. Only reason I graduated on time was Nancy – we used to date. She's a study-beast. Makes great flashcards. Anyway, there's no way I'd ever get into a university good enough for my parents. I wasn't interested in the business degree dad wanted for me; I didn't even bother applying for college. It felt like a waste of time."
Eddie whistles, drawn out and low. "Bet they were thrilled when they found out."
Steve laughs humorlessly. "Yeah. Dad forced me to work this shitty retail job because of it." He halts, drawing himself up and pulling his mouth down. Giving Eddie the most disdainful look he's received, he says in a voice too pompous to be his own, "'If you don't follow the path to the top I laid out for you you'll end up here, at the bottom'." He rolls his eyes, himself again. "That's what he was saying. It backfired on him, because that's where I met Robin. Spent six months on that job, being a fucking aimless disappointment, and then…"
"Then?" Eddie asks, and now it's him desperately grasping at the thread. He needs to know. Anything Steve is willing to give, Eddie will accept.
Steve chews the inside of his cheek. Head hanging, hair falling into his face and glasses sliding down his nose, he resembles a model from an art student's angst-ridden project. Or maybe a movie star in an independent art house film. He just looks like art, okay? Beautiful and out of reach, which only makes you want to touch him more.
"It's kinda private," he says. "For Robin, I mean. The point is it opened my eyes to emergency services. I knew that was something I'd like to do. With some encouragement from her… I did it." He smiles at Eddie like they're sharing secrets. "Turns out studying is more fun when you're interested in the curriculum. My parents disowned me, but it's worth it. I'm as far away from being him as I can come."
He slows his steps then, face sobering before he barks a shocked laugh. The apples of his cheeks are pink.
"Fuck, that just flew out! I'm not usually like this; it's Robin who can't put a cork in it." He laughs again, softer, and levels Eddie with a gaze that borders on adoring. "You're easy to talk to."
Eddie nods. His lungs are burning, he must gasp for breath before speaking. "It's a finely honed skill…"
He swallows, licking his lips. Anything Steve is willing to give, he wants to give back. To take and give. To know and to be known.
He chokes out, "I almost turned into my dad."
"Yeah?" Steve says casually, unaware of the knife Eddie just plunged into his own chest and cut himself open with. "What's he?"
"Prison."
"What?"
Eddie nods breezily. He puts his trembling hands into his jacket pockets. "Petty stuff, but it stacks up. He taught me a few things, though, so if you ever need to hotwire your car or pick a lock… I'm your guy!"
He pulls out his hands to point at himself with both thumbs before shoving them back in. His voice is shriller, and his body's getting the jitters. Can't be still, can't shut up, and now Steve is eyeing him with… sadness? Not disgust, at least, or mistrust.
"But you're a mechanic now, right?" Steve says.
"Yeah. Learned it from my uncle – he took me in after the ol' sperm donor got caught. Greatest man I know, my uncle. I was a crap student," Eddie says, because why not. What's this after divulging about his dad? Nothing! Might as well disclose his aptitude for crime and philistinism. "Completely aimless. Still am. Redid senior year twice."
"Shit."
Grimacing with empathy, Steve sidles up until their elbows brush. A smidgen of tension leaves Eddie as he leans into Steve's warmth.
"Uh-huh. My peers started looking at colleges and all I thought was 'death before higher education!' So, I used my savings to move to Indy and got a job at a garage. It's not what I strictly want, but it pays the bills. Keeps me housed."
"What do you want?" Steve asks, like he wants to know and not just to be polite.
Eddie balloons his cheeks and puffs out the air. "I don't know. I'm passionate about music, but mostly as a hobby. Doing it professionally seems like it sucks. It's all I got, though. That and D&D."
"That's okay." Steve throws an arm around Eddie, and then they're flush. Ribs to ribs. Not an inch separating them. Close enough for Steve's skin to vibrate with Eddie's heartbeat. "You have time to figure it out. And being a mechanic in the meantime is great."
"It-It's not as meaningful as saving lives…" Eddie says, shaking his hair forth so it curtains his face.
Steve hooks the curls around his finger and tucks them back behind Eddie's ear. Holy shit. If Eddie hadn't been clinging to Steve, his jelly-legs would've collapsed and made him eat asphalt.
Steve's gorgeous grin still sends him stumbling a step.
"Sure it is. I bet you've saved someone." Steve leans in, breath ghosting across Eddie's cheekbone as he murmurs, "You'd save me. I know how to change tires and check the oil, but if it's something else? I'm screwed."
Eddie turns his head; their noses nearly bump. Steve's gaze flicks from his eyes to his mouth, indecisive. It chooses his mouth when he pokes his tongue out and drags it over his lips.
"Don't worry, big boy," he says, voice gravelly from use and their proximity. "If you're ever in trouble, just come to me and I'll take care of your engine."
Steve's breath hitches; he flinches back. For a moment Eddie's sure he went too far. But then Steve giggles like a schoolgirl. He ducks his head, face flaming red.
"Cool," he says weakly. "If you ever… heh, I was going to say 'if you ever need the kiss of life, come to me', but… don't." He's leveled himself with Eddie again and is looking at him sternly, though the effect is somewhat ruined by the humor glittering behind his glasses. "Don't ever get fatally injured. Okay?"
Eddie runs a hand down Steve's back, feels him shiver, and looks at him from beneath his lashes. "I make no promises."
A minute later they're caught up with their friends, who are very kind not to comment on how they're plastered to each other.
They buy their food – subs, nachos, chips, cookies, and juice, Steve paying for Robin's after she begs – and wander back to the parking lot by the bar. As a group, so no more clingy cuddling. Just as well, because Eddie's hot enough to erupt if touched again.
Steve didn't get the memo, though, because when they're saying goodnight and about to climb into their respective cars, he pulls Eddie into a hug. A real hug. Two-armed, chest-to-chest, sniffing-the-other-person's-hair kind of hug.
"S'been fun tonight," he says, squeezing Eddie tightly. "This is gonna sound sappy, but I'm glad we ran into each other again."
Ran into each other again.
Ran into each other.
It's a barrel of ice water over Eddie's head. His whole body constricts, shoulders hiking to his ears, jaw clenching. Because they've never actually done that, have they? They ran into each other once, but never again. Every single one of their meetings since has been orchestrated. Made to happen to satisfy Eddie’s obsessive crush. And Steve has no idea.
He doesn't know Eddie is a capital-letters-only FREAK. He doesn't know Eddie gets his rocks off to charity calendars. Fuck, he doesn't know about the calendar.
He has to know. If there's anything Eddie has learned from his millions of failed relationships, it's that there are things you have to know, and this is one of them. Because what'll happen if Steve finds out years from now from someone who isn't Eddie? A shit show, that's what!
Eddie wants for it to be a 'years from now'. He wants to feel Steve's hugs and see his eyes behind thin wire glasses. He wants to smell Steve's shampoo and hear his voice go soft as it says the names of the people he loves.
He wants to take and to give. To know and be known.
Steve has to know.
But how will Eddie tell him?
------------------------------
Part 6
Steve's glasses are a result of @pemsha's lovely fanart. If you haven't seen it yet you can do so here.
Tag list: @rougenancy, @raisedbylibrarians, @yourebuckingkiddingme, @swimmingbirdrunningrock, @emma77645, @goodolefashionedloverboi, @eddielives1986, @stevesbipanic, @the-redthread, @fandemonium-takes-its-toll, @henderdads, @gay-little-bitch, @lenore1232, @zerokrox-blog, @eddiemunsonswife, @cherrycolas-things, @ediewentmissing, @princess-eddie, @atombombbibunny, @ajamlessbaby, @dogswithforks, @grimmfitzz, @cutiecusp, @cuips-not-cute, @manicallydepressedrobot, @messrs-weasley, @madaboutmunson, @mightbeasleep, @suikatto, @brassreign, @snapshotmaestro, @courtjestermunson, @csinnamon-fox, @spectrum-spectre, @spinmewriteround, @just-super-fucking-gay, @escapingthereality, @oneweirdcryptid, @deehellcat, @misticageri, @lovelyscot, @linkydinky06, @rynnytintin, @anything-thats-rock-and-roll, @theysherobinbuckley, @freddykicksasses, @winterbuckwild, @sideblogofthcentury, @subparbrainfunction
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It takes a mob part 2
part one is here.
part 3 is here.
Bill was honestly considering the store up as hostage as he glared at the isle.
30 dollars for the cheapest can of formula?? 20 for diapers??
Jesus this had to be considered gouging at this point.
Bill felt another headache begin to throb as he tried his best to decipher the difference between brands. 
‘Not a day of health class Bill,’ he grimaced as he gently shook one oof the cans. ‘Yet here you are.’
Bill never saw himself for fatherhood, he may have pondered it once or twice in his years but only in that sort of abstract way that one ponders throwing your favorite cup. It would be stupid to do, but for a moment or two tempting.
Then he got tangled up into the goon lifestyle and any notion of that pondering went out the building.
There were enough kids in Gotham without father figures, no use accidentally making another one if he slipped up.
‘And look all that thinking led yah Billy,’ his old man droned on in his head, ‘all the work, non’ of the fun. that don’t make a happy man son.’
Bill was half tempted to open that old burner phone; it sat in his breast pocket.
Even if all that would answer would be the machine.
But no, Bill had this.
‘what’s the worst that could happen?’ he pondered as he put the tin in the cart, ‘watching three kids.’
they weren’t his after all.
He found his cohorts in the next isle shaking various items at the kid.
“What in the name of Crime Alley are you two idiots doing?”
“Oh, hey Bill!”
Ken didn’t even turn to face him, what kind of etiquette were they training these guys with? 
“Again, what the fuck are you doin’? I asked you two to pick out a couple outfits for the tyke.”
“annnd we did!” Marv chuckled handing over a bundle of cloth, “We just thought that the kid deserve somethin’ cute for being so good to us is all.”
“Actually Bill, mind throwing in your two cents? which one do you think Dan would prefer the rabbit or the frog?’
Bill pinched his brow,
“I don’t know man, what difference does it make?”
“What difference?! Man, this is his first toy we’re talking about!” Ken exclaimed,
“This is a big deal! If he’s anything like my Me Mah told me I was than he’s going to be carrying it for years!’
Danny for his part blew a bubble with his mouth, great input kid.
“I- the rabbit, I guess! I dunno, maybe he’ll like Alice in wonderland or some shit.”
Marv seemed to perk up at the thought.
“Hell yeah brother! Boss likes those old books anyways, so he probably won’t notice if we borrow a copy for a bit!”
Ken snorted as he casually thew the frog back on the shelf,
“Marven, in case you forgot, Boss is very careful with those books of his. If you want to risk it, I won’t stop you but it’s your fingers on the line man.”
“Aww, anything for our lil’ Danny!”
The clerk raised an eyebrow but kept their mouth shut as the three goons went to pay. They kept their mouth shut as Bill paid in crumpled bills and let them get on their way.
“Yeah, well pass Ken wonderlad will you? This shit isn’t going to carry itself.”
Danny babbled as they tried to sort everything into a carriable position. He shook his new toy too a fro in an almost comical manner. Like he was giving orders before an ops.
Eventually they made headway and started to make their way back to crime alley. Only for Bill to raise a occupied hand to stop the others in their step.
“Wait a moment.. where are we heading? It’ll be suspicious if we head back to base. We clocked out hours ago.”
Marv shook his head,
“Can’t go back to my place, Gwen just got done with a double shift in the ER.”
“Kenny?”
Ken snorted and shook his head as well,
“We can try but we all know Me Mah is packin’ and not scared to point first if she doesn’t expect company.”
“Then where the hell are going to go?”
Bill didn’t like how the two of them were suddenly staring at him,
“No.”
“Aww come on Bill!”
“Nope. Nah ah”
Ken rolled his eyes kicked at his shin,
“It’s just for one night Bill. Tomorrow we can ask around with the other guys, but it’s not like we have many options right now.”
“My apartment is like the least kid friendly place in the neighborhood!”
Danny have a little wine as he shoved his face into Ken’s shoulder,
“Bill..”
‘Fuck…’
Bill pinched his nose as he closed his eyes, if only to block out the puppy eyes Marv was sending his way. For a big lug, it was stupid how effective they were.
“Fine… One night and you two owe me a favor after this.”
The two dumbasses actually let out a cheer loud enough to wake a nearby dog.
Leading the way Bill couldn’t help but wonder if it was too late to go to bar like they planned.
~~~~~~~~~
Hoodlums:
​@reinluna,@confused-moose-child,@mimilikey,@emeraudesfateandfandoms, @dolfay, @boredomfarie, @aconitewolfbane, @withoutcontxt, @onyxlightdragon, @satanicrutialspecialist, @phoenixdemonqueen, @vixen-uchiha, @skulld3mort-1fan, @bytheoldwillowtree, @illusionwolfwriter24r8, @thewonderoflebanon, @vipower001, @autumnwulf,
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shy-urban-hobbit · 7 months
Note
20 with Laiden please!
20 - "I'm always on your side."
Lambert slammed the door to his room closed, fighting the urge to scream or yell or throw something, no matter how cathartic it might be. He didn't want to give Vesemir the satisfaction of knowing how much he'd gotten under his skin.
The two of them had always been at loggerheads ("Too alike" Eskel had commented once. Lambert had promptly and soundly beaten his ass in training for such slander), but it had been worse since the other Wolves had found out about Aiden.
For all their suspicions at first, Geralt and Eskel at least eventually reached some form of grudging acceptance: Lambert was still returning to them alive and well every year after all, and The Cat - according to Lambert - had never pushed his luck fishing for an invitation to The Keep, nor had he dragged Lambert off to the proverbial lions den that was Dyn Marv. Vesemir on The other hand...
Every winter since, it had been more criticism, more thinly veiled comments about Lambert's decisions, snipes about his sense of judgement, backhanded comments on things he knew wouldn't even register had it been either Geralt or Eskel. The old man had started early this year too, he hadn't even been back a full week.
He was sure that if he bought Aiden up here, Vesemir would soon change his tune if he gave him a chance. The problem was, he didn't trust Vesemir enough to not try stabbing Aiden for long enough to do that. His brothers had tried to help to begin with but over time the words had dwindled down to sympathetic looks. Lambert didn't want to blame them - if Vesemir hadn't listened the second time, he wouldn't listen the hundredth, but part of him that was steadily growing bigger wanted to curl up against the feeling of being so alone in his own home and yet knowing things would be worse if he didn't return every year. There was no way Vesemir and by extension Geralt and Eskel wouldn't assume the worst if he just didn't show up, just as they would if he told them he'd be wintering with Aiden (if he ever asked). He was damned if he did, damned if he didn't.
Just once, he'd like someone else to yell at Vesemir when he started on him. To tell him to shut the fuck up, that he didn't know what he was talking about, 'respect' be damned. He knew that would never happen though, it was his job to be the disrespectful one, after all.
He dragged himself from where he'd been slumped against the door on the cold stone floor (when had he sat down?) and grabbed his pack, upturning it aggressively. Didn't want to give the old man any more ammunition by not doing laundry.
He blinked in surprise when he saw it. A small slip of parchment rolled up and placed in one of his empty potion bottles. Odd. After some minutes trying to fish it out and not give into the urge to just smash the damn thing to get it out, he unfurled it and gave a small smile. Someone up there had a weird sense of humour.
As if summoned by Lambert's thoughts, familiar, spidery writing stared back at him. The slightly slanted i, the y that sometimes looked more like a g and could only be differentiated by the loops made by the tails - Aiden always went a little fancier on his Y's for some reason.
"I'm always on your side."
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tender-rosiey · 2 years
Note
Ohoho~ rosie opened requests I see *rubs hands together*
OKAY! I'm a total nerd when it comes to stuff like crocheting and sewing SO! imagine a domestic fluff in a quiet and a warm atmosphere while s/o is crocheting a hat or sweater for her husband while humming and her husband just adores her from far
With Chuuya Atsushi and Dazai!
Also I hope u r doing well these days my luv🥺💕💕💕
“HANDMADE SOFTNESS”
— aka them walking in on you sewing/crocheting
includes chuuya, dazai and atsushi
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ᴀ/ɴ: hey bby, hope you’re doing well too 🥺💕 I really hope you like this AHHHH I can’t believe it took me so long
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NAKAHARA CHUUYA:
he is finally home after a long day; taking his hat off, he sighs. a nice aroma fells the room that makes his stomach growl, and a gentle soft tune is being hummed, filling his house with an air of domesticity.
“…y/n?” he mumbles softly when he enters the living room.
you are still focusing on what you have at hand, apparently sewing a new article of clothing and chuuya can’t help his heart that flutters at the content smile you have on your face.
nonetheless, he walks towards you, steps soft and light, “hey there pretty,” he greets with a small peck to your cheek.
“oh!” you get out of your trance and look at him, “welcome home, honey!” you beam and he rests his forehead in your shoulder.
“yeah,” he murmurs, pressing light kisses to your neck making you laugh.
you squeak, “hold on!”
his gaze flicks to you for a second, giving you his full attention, “hm?”
“let me finish this scarf first.”
he looks at your hands, “scarf?”
“yeah! for you!” you smile, “you said your neck gets cold often because of your work attire, right?”
he blinks multiple times before chuckling and pinching your cheek, “you don’t need to do that.”
“well, I want to so shut up and let me do my work,” you huff and he gives up.
he sits on the ground, leaning his back on your legs and his head against the side of your knee, “I will be here then,” he sleepily says.
“your ass and back are going to hurt when you wake up,” you note.
“don’t care,” chuuya presses a last kiss to your thigh before closing his eyes, “wanna be close to you so shut up.”
DAZAI OSAMU:
“bella! belladonna! my dearest most gorgeous lover to exist!” he screams as he gets closer to you and wraps his arms around you.
you gasp before you scold him, “‘samu! you could’ve hurt the both of us!”
“huh?” he pulls back to see the needles in your hands before holding your face gently and rubbing your cheek with his own, “I am so sorry, my love! I promise I will be more careful for you!”
dazai kneels down in front of you and presses a kiss to your stomach, “and for you too.”
you roll your eyes, “at this point, the unborn baby gets more kisses than me.”
your hands continue their work and the shape finally comes to his eyes: you were making tiny socks.
he giggles, a sound not too foreign to you now, “no need to be jealous, my dear; you will always be my number one baby.”
“spare me the trouble,” you grumble and he starts humming a lullaby you have both created for your baby.
you join in as well not too late after, slowly falling into sync and harmonizing.
“the baby is sure going to be a lucky one,” he says in between the song and you nod, concentrating on both the crocheting and the song you’re singing for your child.
dazai stares at you for a bit, eyes glazed and his hands rub at them quickly before he hides in your lap, “you’re marvelous, y/n; truly.”
you smile, hands momentarily coming to a stop as you ruffle the hair of your husband gently.
“to think I can experience such bliss,” he whispers, “and with my darling angel of all people,” you stick your tongue out teasingly and he chuckles.
he is silent again before speaking up, “I think I am starting to ramble.”
“maybe you’re nervous,” you conclude.
he looks at you, and you’re half expecting a dramatic comeback however—it never comes.
instead, you’re meant with a sad sigh, “maybe.”
you put aside the new pairs of socks you made and before dazai gets the chance to marvel at them, you squeeze his cheeks together so he can face you.
“bebadonna?” he manages to muffle out and you pout.
“we’re gonna get through this together and we will be great parents.”
“but—“
you smack his face lightly, “say that we will.”
he looks at you and you repeat yourself, a little louder, “SAY THAT WE WILL!” okay maybe not just a little.
“we will! we will!” you let go and he rubs his sore cheeks, “my god, love; you can be so scary sometimes.”
says the infamous former mafia executive.
NAKAJIMA ATSUSHI:
atsushi is on cloud nine.
anyone can practically see the heart eyes he has on you, and they wouldn’t blame him.
you looked so ethereal, so calm and content.
it was like you were in your own little world, and he can’t help but admire you from afar not wanting to disturb you.
“atsushi!” you call, snapping him from his thoughts and he happily runs towards you with a smile.
“yes, y/n?”
you stand up, “stand still,” and he does as told. you put the sweater against his chest to make sure the shoulders would be comfortable, “okay, you can go now,” you say sweetly before sitting down and continuing your work.
he stares at your hands at work, always so elegant and delicate with everything. the sight of the bandages on your fingers pain him, but he is glad it doesn’t happen often.
he sits beside you and starts drumming a slow tone on your knee and you hum to the rythme he created.
a smile on both your faces, the atmosphere is light-hearted, soft and gentle on the soul.
even the world’s most chaotic villain would relax even the tiniest bit.
“ya atsushi!”
sweet moments never fucking last in this building however.
the were-tiger visibly grimaces and dazai acts like he has been shot in the heart, “you would rather sit in silence than hear my beautiful voice?!”
“yes.”
the brown haired man screams falling onto his back, succeeding in finishing the finale of i am dead, the new play.
“I am done,” you quip and atsushi’s attention is instantly on you once again.
you help him wear the sweater and he nuzzles into it, “it’s so comfy! thank you so much!”
“it’s nothing really; I wanted to make it for you,” you hum before pressing a kiss to his nose.
“oh how romantic indeed! truly a romance out of a fairy tail—“
“dazai-san, get out.”
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taglist: @magenta-cat-drawingss @pompompurin1028 @scul-pted @dazaisdeathwish @requiem626k @nameless-shrimp @shinys-bsd-world-1 @sonder-paradise @ravenina14 @jessbeinme15s-notebook @todorokichills @ginneko @missrown @shrynkk @simplyxsinned @beautiful-is-boring @bakugossanity @izukus-gf @irethepotato @thekaylahub @luciferspen @aeanya @sweetcloudsimp @waosobii
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copyright © 2020 tender-rosiey
do not copy or plagiarize or you will be reported
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Justice for Brandon Routh: Everything Cut From Superman Returns that makes it Great
Ultimately it's good Superman Returns didn't get sequels because of Bryan Singer & Kevin Spacey, but I'm kinda obsessed with the forgotten middle-child of Supes' movies, and it's infuriating how the movie's thematic spine and most of its best character-beats got cut.
The Theatrical Cut of Returns is literally half a movie. Brandon Routh deserved so much better.
Sources:
Deleted scene compilation (+Return to Krypton)
The Shooting Script (available to buy)
Superman Homepage deleted shots Page 1 and Page 2    
Novelisation by Marv Wolfman (this, the graphic novel & junior novelisation all used the 2005 shooting script.)
Superman Returns: The Visual Guide (available to buy)
Chew Chan comic art
Requiem for Krypton: Making Superman Returns
Prequel Comics (based on scenes from early drafts, with stories by writers Singer, Dougherty & Harris):
Prequel Comic #2: Ma Kent
Prequel Comic #3: Lex Luthor
Prequel Comic #4: Lois Lane
Comic book recap
‘78 opened with a boy narrating an issue of Action Comics. Returns pulled back red theatre drapes on a comic narrated by Clois’ son, Jason. 
Actor Tristan Lake is recording the voiceover in Requiem for Krypton
From the Script (p.1):
RED THEATRE CURTAINS, drawn shut. The kind found in classic movie houses of yesteryear. The slowly open ... the film flickers to life, fading in on an old comic-book
SUPERMAN. A BOY'S HAND reaches into frame and opens it.
JASON (V.O.): On a distant planet orbiting a red sun, a wise scientist predicted his world's imminent destruction. Despite overwhelming evidence, his pleas to evacuate the planet were ignored, leaving him and his wife no choice...
He turns the page to a panel of JOR-EL and his wife, LARA
JASON (V.O.) (CONT'D): ...but to place their only son into a spaceship and launch it to another galaxy, in hopes of finding the child a new home. A child destined to become Earth's greatest protector...
“In Golden Age style art, Kal-El is placed in the rocket by Jor-El and Lara, comes to Earth, grows up with the Kents, & learns that he possessed amazing powers.”
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The script cuts the Smallville part because it’s covered later in flashback.
5 years on, Superman has been mythologised. In-universe, to kids he seems as make-believe as comic books are to us.
This develops Jason’s POV of Superman. He was supposed to have this comic (from 'Uncle Jimmy') when he meets Clark in The Daily Planet
This could be why Smallville was cut; the public only knows about Krypton
The opening scene of Gertrude Vanderworth’s death was originally replaced by:
Prequel: Lex in prison 
Lex’s cell is covered in Daily Planet clippings. He nonologues to henchman Stanford
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LEX: I didn’t get you visiting privileges to my private suite so I could repeat myself … My work was more than mere greed … It’s a calling. Why can’t they see the danger? He’s a vanguard for an invasion of super-powered beings. I knew. I always knew. Making sure there was a line of defence against him. The Conquistadors carried a plague that decimated entire civilisations. Who knows what kind of spaceborne diseases he carried? Oh, they may not appreciate my genius now, but they will worship me for delivering them from this menace they so affectionately embrace.
Kitty Kowalski & Gertrude Vanderworth
Lex has a medical exam before his release. His henchwoman Kitty is the nurse. She flirts with him but complains Superman is all Lex thinks about 
Lex burns his old toupé to “cleanse” himself
In flashback, Kitty sees Lex kill an inmate in self-defence. Lex threatens her to protect his perfect record. But Kitty says she’s his “biggest fan” & anger becomes lust 
This is in The Visual Guide (p.26):
"She witnessed Lex murder a fellow inmate. Kitty refused to squeal to the guards, and she and Lex made clear their attraction for each-other."
Kitty is the Vanderworth widow's maid & suggests Lex write to her
She doesn’t like the name Kitty: “My name is Katherine”
An imaginary Superman hovers above, watching Lex leave prison.
Gertrude Vanderworth is waiting outside:
LEX: Gertrude! I’m dying in here. I’m dying without you. Please, take me home. If only you could imagine the grotesque living conditions I’ve been exposed to, dear, sweet Gertrude. You’ve rescued me from Dante’s Inferno, from the depths of human depravity.
Shows how prison changed Gene Hackman’s Lex into Returns’ philosophical maniac
Characterizes Kitty as Lex’s ‘Harley Quinn-lite’ & makes her more active
Stronger explanation for Lex's escape than Clark missing his court date 
The comic's final panel is Lex looking up at the imaginary Superman in the sky, zooming out into space, then leading into...
The Opening Titles as Clark’s journey to Krypton:
(from the Script):
“Stars interspersed with DAILY PLANET HEADLINES tracing Superman’s history, many by LOIS LANE;
“METEOR SHOWER BAFFLES SCIENTISTS”
“CAPED WONDER STUNS CITY”
“I SPENT THE NIGHT WITH SUPERMAN”
“SUPERMAN STOPS CRIMINAL MASTERMIND, LEX LUTHOR”
“LEX GETS LIFE THANKS TO MAN OF STEEL: SWEARS REVENGE”
“ASTRONOMERS DISCOVER KRYPTON INTACT – SIGNS OF LIFE FOUND”
And then the biggest headline of them all:
“SUPERMAN DISAPPEARS”
More headlines follow as the world is besieged … war, famine, crime. Soon, these headlines push Superman to the back pages. Within years, he’s all but faded from public consciousness. Finally, one last headline:
“WILL HE EVER RETURN?”
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IS IT KRYPTON? (p.12), LUTHOR GETS LIFE (p.24) & VANDERWORTH TOPS THE FORTUNE 500!! (p.22) are in The Visual Guide
This gives the indulgent title-sequence a purpose. It sets up the consequences of Clark leaving, his history with Lois & Lex, Krypton’s discovery, and the Vanderworth fortune Lex will steal
This transitions into:
Return to Krypton
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Concept art by Ben Proctor
The script describes “the remnants of this great civilisation… cities, monuments… all made from the same crystal technology” not in the filmed scene
Clark finds the House of El crest in the “VALLEY OF THE ELDERS . . . a VAST CANYON OF CRYSTAL MONOLITHS arranged in a circle” with more family crests.
Clark's escape is more visceral (Script pp.2-3):
“GIANT SLABS whiz by ... thousands of pieces of glowing kryptonite are hurtling towards him ... Parts [of Clark’s ship] shatter and break off ... The crystal immediately GROWS BACK ... more kryptonite smashes against the window, cracking it. Crystals work quickly to repair the damage, but it keeps coming.”
The filmed version puts Vibes over story: 
The Valley of Elders returns on Lex’s New Krypton in the finale. 
Without the other House crests the El one feels random
Showing Krypton's achievements validates Lex’s plan to resurrect it.
Clark’s ship self-repairing introduces ‘growing’ crystals immediately
Opening an action beat is important because the next one isn’t for 40 mins
Famously, this scene cost $10 million. Videographer Rob Burnett said:
“This was always meant to be the original opening [it] explained why he was so weak when Martha found him [&] that Kal-El sweats in the presence of kryptonite which Luthor notices later ... It wasn't cut until some last-minute test screenings … people unfamiliar with Donner's Superman films & Kryptonian crystals/tech found this dialogue-less opening confusing & uninteresting”
To solve this dialogue problem it was suggested Clark bring his mother Lara's memory crystal with him. She would narrate Krypton's history as Clark explored, contrasting its past glory with its current ruin. But the scene was already finished & Singer decided:
I didn’t feel it ... No-one told me to do it. I had no time restrictions or pressure whatsoever. I just felt the movie doesn’t need this."
But Marv Wolfman did something similar when retelling Jor El and Lara sending Clark away in Chapter 1 of his novelisation:
“It had been a timeless city, strong and powerful. It survived the vast armies of three great nations waging war on its bloodied streets. It stood proud as the signing place of an everlasting peace . . . [Lara] spent her early years dreaming of living where Krypton’s earliest founders had once walked, did not want to believe that this magnificence and all it stood for would soon be gone. She had spent her first year out of university touring the city . . . She trekked out to the Valley of the Elders . . . the fabled roads that Sor-El, Kol-Ar and Pol-As, the chosen representatives from the three warring nations, must’ve taken when they created the original laws of humanity that governed Krypton. From the ground, those crystal monolith towers, reflecting the full spectrum of light, looked to Lara like hands raised in reverential prayer. Kryptonopolis had been grown from a single crystal more than 10,000 years before ... shaped by the earliest Kryptonians into vast cities millions of buildings strong"
The Visual Guide also explains the Valley of the Elders is “Where Sor-El, Kol-Ar, and Pol-Us established the laws that governed Krypton" (p.79)
This is a great parallel to ‘78's opening. That was Clark’s origin. Returns is him mourning
Seeing Krypton contextualizes Clark’s arc. We understand his alienation instead of being alienated by him
It bookends the movie with New Krypton, and gives Returns’ oft-mocked climax ‘Superman Lifts a Big Thing’, thematic weight: Clark is excising the grief that drove him from Earth
Lara's narration about the wonders of Krypton both heightens the tragedy & establishes what their tech can achieve, crucial to Lex's plan
Writer Dan Harris said:
“Lex Luthor’s trying to turn this world [Earth] into the dead world, the place [Clark] can’t live, so it becomes a person’s search for identity and home and their place in the universe.” (The Shooting Script interviews p.27)
Martha Kent and Ben Hubbard play Scrabble 
Martha spells ‘Alienation’ (THEMES!!) & touching Clark’s name carved into the table is lovely visual storytelling
Ben is there when Clark crashes. Martha stops him calling the cops.
BEN: Martha-
MARTHA: (firm) Tomorrow. Bingo.
She looks at him, stonefaced. He takes another look outside – and at her, and realizes what’s happening. He sighs and shakes his head.
BEN: A meteorite?
She nods.
BEN (CONT’D): Martha Kent, I knew you’d be trouble
There’s a blooper of this scene in Requiem for Krypton & it's mentioned in The Visual Guide (p.20)
Gertrude Vanderworth's death, and Lex stealing her fortune, is shown after Clark passes out in Martha’s arms when he crashes, followed by Lex taking the yacht to the Arctic
Lex Finding the Fortress
Cool details about the Fortress' warm crystals & creating protective weather patterns, explaining the storm around New Krypton in the finale
While exploring the Fortress they find Clark's garage:
From The Visual Guide:
"Lex lingers in a cavernous chamber he dubs 'the garage', where he sees evidence of the construction and launch of Superman's spaceship"
KITTY: So did he?
LEX: Did he what?
KITTY: Take off for his homeworld?
LEX: (looking at Stanford) Well… We gave him a little push.
In the novelisation (p.89)
Lex’s First Experiment
After plundering the Fortress, Lex would test the crystal immediately- “he created a kind of giant Fortress of Solitude in the ice” (Script interviews p.28), destroying the original. Such a great way to raise the stakes!
Extended Clark waking in his childhood room
Clark waking to his starry ceiling & the Kent family photos give his return more emotional heft
Extended Young Clark’s first flight, 
Which leads into…
 “Little Secret”- Clark finds the Kryptonian ship as a boy
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From The Visual Guide (p.11): “When he holds the Father Crystal, Clark feels a primal connection to the vanished world of his ancestors”. Martha’s prequel comic shows Jor El & Lara reflected in the crystal.
The Father Crystal is the key to Lex’s plan, so it's important to see its importance to Clark.
'Little Secret' leads into: 
Martha Kent Prequel: The Kents tell the truth
The Kents find Clark on the cellar steps with the Father Crystal, staring at his ship.
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They talk in the kitchen:
MARTHA: … I wish we could tell you more… well, anything about your real parents
CLARK: You are my real parents. Those other people, the ones that gave me away… They mean nothing to me. [he bends a fork in half]
JONATHAN: I understand that you feel that way now, Clark. But I have something to show you. [He leaves the room to get something]
CLARK:Ma, I- I… Am I even human? Am I some sort of monster?MARTHA: Clark Kent, bite your tongue! You are our son and we love you. That’s all that matters.
JONATHAN: Clark? This is yours. You were wrapped in it when we found you.
He gives Clark the cloth he was wrapped in when they found him - blue fabric with the “S” shield
This is a big change from ‘78, where Clark didn’t find the Father Crystal until after Jonathan dies. Martha wasn’t there & they didn't discuss it. The Fortress of Solitude made his suit.
Clark's anxiety is more in-line with MoS (“Can’t I just keep pretending to be your son?” / “You are my son.”). Rejecting Krypton is important, as his adult desire for a home drives him from Earth
Here we see Clark feel the alienation he fears for Jason in his final speech ("you will be different..."). Parenting is a big theme of Returns
Clark reads Why the World Doesn’t Need Superman in the Kent barn 
In the script, Clark taking the tarp off his ship leads into the Little Secret flashback- which the deleted scene cuts around. The shots following him back to farmhouse include this voiceover (Script pp.13-14):
LOIS LANE (V.O.): For five long years, the world has stared into the sky, waiting, hoping, and praying for his return. We have spent our days asking where he went, debated why he left, and wondered if he’s even alive…
People have always longed for gods, messiahs, and saviors to swoop down from the sky and deliver them from their troubles. But in the end, these saviors always leave, and we are faced with the same troubles that were there from the beginning.
So, instead of facing them ourselves, we wait for the savior to return. But the savior never does, and we realize it was better had he never come at all.
Reading WTWDNS is referenced in The Visual Guide (p.29)
Articulating Lois’ POV makes her more than a bitter ex. Even the Junior novelisation has this!
In the Theatrical Cut Clark returns to the Daily Planet trying to reclaim the old status quo, until he learns Lois has a family. Here, he faces consequences for leaving before learning Lois has moved on, so he’s less selfishly motivated, and returns to the Planet to actively reconcile with her
Parallels Young!Clark finding the Father Crystal- the inciting moment of ‘78’s plot
Martha encourages Clark to return to Metropolis / Clark meets Ben Hubbard 
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This is a cute scene, humanizing Clark
Martha is selling the farm & moving to Montana
(Script p. 76), cut dialogue in purple
MARTHA: Clark, dear… No one will ever replace your father. But, Ben and I have found something special. Together. And, well, this might all come as a shock…
Clark gives her a look. Just level with me.
MARTHA: I’m selling the farm. We’re moving to Montana.
CLARK: Montana?
MARTHA: The lakes are great. And we love the fishing.
CLARK: Fishing?!
MARTHA: Clark, you’ve been gone a long time. And not even you can stop the world from spinning.
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In the novelisation (p.76)
Building this subplot from a background character from ‘78 is neat.
It expands Returns’ narrow emotional scope: It's not just Lois moving on
Superman suit in Clark’s case & changing in The Daily Planet closet 
As Clark puts his suitcase in the janitor’s closet he opens it, revealing his Superman costume & a Kent family photo.
So, when he rips his shirt open there’s "NOTHING. Where's his suit? He panics, then remembers." . He must change in the Daily Planet janitor’s closet. As he leaves he "catches a glimpse of his reflection in a window -- he's still wearing GLASSES" (the Script p.44)
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Love Superman in glasses as a metaphor for the transition from Clark to Supes. 
The Theatrical cut emphasizes Lois’ POV of Superman’s return but this is more balanced & impactful for Clark 
Lex and Stanford discuss Superman’s return
When Lex learns Superman is back he & Stanford discuss luring him away. You can see Stanford running to catch up with Lex before the Theatrical scene cuts away. Deleted dialogue in purple:
STANFORD: So, what are we going to do?
LEX: You’re going to modify it and attach it to the stern, I don’t care of the instructions are in Russian
STANFORD: You know what I mean, Lex. He’s not stupid. How long do you think it’s going to take him to trace all that stuff back to me– and you. He was supposed to die up there.
Stanford paces. Lex clenches, obviously stressed. He hears the WHIMPERING of Gertrude’s dog. 
Infuriated, Lex hurls the newspaper at it but misses. Enraged, Lex snatches a heavy crystal off the desk, when he STOPS. He stares at something on the NEWSPAPER
Lex bends down and picks up the paper. He smiles, and hands it to Stanford.
LEX: Stanford, you worry too much.
Stanford looks at the article, intrigued.
“WORLD’S LARGEST COLLECTION OF METEORITES TO EXHIBIT AT METROPOLIS MUSEUM OF NATURAL HISTORY”
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Lex & Stanford faking Krypton’s discovery makes all Clark's problems his fault. Clark did nearly die, & it makes Lex a more formidable villain
It makes the plot more cohesive 
Clark being tricked by his nemesis > ‘he just left lol’
Lex’s desperation gives him depth. Stealing Kryptonite is now a response to Superman, where in the Theatrical cut it’s so underplayed it seems like just the next step of his plan.
Stanford and The Daily Planet
I can’t find it, but Mr. Sunday Movies  cites an interview where the actor revealed Stanford was a disgraced Daily Planet science correspondent, & wrote the articles about Krypton. 
More plot cohesion, connecting The Daily Planet & Lex plots. If Lois recognises Stanford when she’s on Lex's yacht, she could figure out Clark was tricked, helping her forgive him. 
Extended Clois outside The Daily Planet
Deleted dialogue in purple, (Script pp.58-60):
CLARK: Well … Maybe saying goodbye was so hard because he didn’t know whether it would be goodbye for a little while … or goodbye forever.
Lois doesn’t seem to be listening
CLARK (CONT’D, QUIETER): And maybe he had to go and he wanted to say goodbye, but he couldn’t find the guts to do it, because maybe if he saw you, even one last time… Well, maybe he was afraid that if he even looked at you just… once… he would never be able to… leave (beat) Maybe it was too difficult for him.
. . .
CLARK: So… Do you want to grab a quick bite? Catch up? My treat.
LOIS: Oh I’d love to, but Daddy took the car and it’s my turn to ‘cook’ the family dinner, which means I’ve got just enough time to get back to the ‘suburbs’ and order the Chinese
CLARK: Suburbs?
LOIS: Yeah, we have a really nice place on the river. You should drop in sometime.
CLARK: I’d love to.
Brandon performs this dialogue for a screentest in Requiem for Krypton
Much better reason for Clark not saying goodbye. Corny, but if your gonna justify an OOC decision, do it with the romance at the heart of your movie. 
Lois is much nicer & less dismissive of Clark. Theatrical Lois seems to actively dislike him.
Hints Lois feels stifled as a suburban mom
Lois Prequel: Writing Why The World Doesn’t Need Superman
The ‘Lois at home’ scene begins with a flashback:
Perry tells Lois to write a piece for the 5th anniversary of Superman leaving. She struggles with writer’s block at home, & goes out to smoke. She thinks Clark blows out her lighter, but she’s imagining it & realizes she must move on. That night she writes WTWDNS
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Then Richard asks about I Spent the Night With Superman, then Clark is revealed to be watching at the end of the scene.
[After Clark flies away, Script p.63]
Lois picks up some food, then suddenly stops and turns to the window, staring into their backyard. Beat.
RICHARD: Lois? You okay?
Lois snaps out of it.
LOIS: Yeah, sorry. Hey, didn’t I have four won-ton’s?
Jason stuffs a won-ton into his mouth.
LOIS (CONT’D): JASON!
Lois & Richard dive, trying to snatch it from his mouth
A cute Jason moment, & Lois ‘sensing’ Clark makes his spying a little less creepy, selling their 'stracrossed lovers' connection
Superman On Patrol
Two scenes are omitted from the script (p.64) before the ‘Bulletproof’ bank robbery. Presumably they formed a full crime-fighting montage, like in ‘78.
The Visual Guide describes two cut sequences that perfectly fill that gap (p. 60):
“In Switzerland, he saved 12 stranded climbers from the peak of the Matterhorn. In Venice, he prevented the famous canals from flooding the city streets. Superman seems to be everywhere at once, but nowhere is he more prominent than in Metropolis…”
Full Deli Robbery Segment
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MONTAGE REPORTER #3: Sir, after he captured the men trying to rob your Deli, did he do or say anything?
DELI OWNER: He tried the hummus. He said he liked it – and Superman never lies!
More action! More wholesome Superman! Expanding the scope of the movie beyond Metropolis!
Lex’s Plan
Higher-key Kryptonite heist where Lex’s gang fool guards and witnesses
The movie needs more energy. Like the stolen missile earlier, in the Theatrical Cut Lex’s plan is afterthought bullet-points 
When Kitty returns to Lex after Superman saves her, the stolen missile is being disassembled. Lex takes its explosive & the kryptonite he’ll stab Clark with 
Lois Prequel: Why she resents Superman and meeting Richard
After Perry demands Lois interview Superman we flashback to him doing the same thing after Krypton was found:
But Superman never shows. Months pass until “the world had to admit” he was gone.
The world turned to Lois as their 'Superman expert.'
JIMMY: Miss Lane. You okay?
LOIS: I will be once Perry lets me cover something over than Superman. He left. He's gone, and maybe he's never coming back. How many different ways can I write that?
JIMMY: I know Miss Lane. I miss him too.
The world refusing to let Lois move on by pigeon-holing her as ‘Superman’s Girlfriend’ is important context.
Now Perry refusing to let Lois cover the blackout is part of a sexist cycle she’s fought for years
Lois escapes to the roof for a smoke: "Even as the days kept passing, I held out hope. I mean, he never disappointed me before, right?'
Richard White introduces himself just like Clark:
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RICHARD: Those things will kill you, you know. Hello, Lois. I'm Richard White.
LOIS: White, huh? Did Perry even read past your last name on your resume?
RICHARD: I won't deny what it looks like, but my uncle hired me because I'm damn good at what I do. And with you I see wasted talent. The Superman story is old news. The Planet's best reporter should be used elsewhere.
LOIS: You're certainly more insightful than you look, White.
Directly parallels Richard and Clark
And contrasts the rooftop interview with Superman immediately afterwards; we now know she waited here for Clark to return every night until she met Richard
Clark Visits the Fortress of Solitude
When Clark visits the Fortress of Solitude he has cut voiceover (Script p.89):
SUPERMAN (V.O.): Father... It’s been a long time since I’ve come to you… But I’ve never felt so alone.
EXT. FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE - SAME TIME
Superman lands & approaches the console. The crystal has been taken. WITH A VOICE ECHOING THROUGH THE ARCTIC LIKE THUNDER:
SUPERMAN: FATHER!!!
FATHER!!! Is OTT but important when Superman has so little dialogue
Clark is now clearly driven to the Fortress by Lois’ rejection. In The Theatrical Cut, he just checks in because it’s time for Plot to happen.
Losing Jor-El emphasizes the theme of parenthood- Clark loses a father as he gains a son- & justifies Jor El’s voiceover later
Lex's Fortress
In an earlier draft, Clark found the new Fortress Lex grew in his first experiment, and "Clark sunk it and put it underwater"
Originally “Richard & Lois flew there with Clark to investigate & take pictures" (Script interviews p.28) but later on these became satellite pictures that were delivered to the Planet. Lois saw them & understood what Clark had lost.
Lois seeing & understanding Cark's losses is important
Clark destroying Lex's Fortress would be an impressive action beat & Returns is desperate for those. Showing Lex's impact through action!
Extended dialogue on the yacht explaining Lex’s plan
LEX: It’s not just an island. It’s an entirely new continent. Virtually indestructible and self-sustaining. For lack of a better name, it’s Krypton. An extinct world, reborn on our own.
LEX: I’ll have ADVANCED alien technology thousands of years beyond anything anyone could throw at me. Weapons, vehicles, you name it. 
Gives New Krypton more credibility & makes Lex's plan more concrete, especially after Return to Krypton showcased Kryptonian tech
Saving Metropolis
Earlier drafts of the ‘Saving Metropolis’ sequence had “monster waves surging in every direction” (The Visual Guide p.70) Dan Harris also mentioned "waves coming in" and Clark “pulling a subway train out [of the ground]”. (Script interviews p.28) The script omits several sections that could fit these moments.
The script includes Clark saving people from cars set on fire by the gas explosion.
Again, Returns copies ‘78, but that earthquake was way bigger - a dam explodes, a bridge collapses, a train derails. Clark shifts tectonic plates to stop it.
Perry White meets Superman
I understand why this was cut but it’s still cool
The Missile Explosive
After Jason kills Brutus, the deleted scene of Lex finding Brutus’ body is followed by (Script pp.113-114):
INT. YACHT - PANTRY Lois & Jason sit against the far wall, exhausted & worried. The door swings open, revealing LEX. He looks at Jason & winks.
LEX: Catch.
He tosses SOMETHING into the room, wrapped in the handkerchief. It rolls towards Jason’s feet. LOIS CHARGES just as Lex slams the door. Jason removes Lex’s handkerchief, revealing the EXPLOSIVE from  the missile.
LOIS: Honey… don’t move.
Lois is panicked, searching for any way to get rid of the explosive. Finally; a SMALL AIR DUCT. She kneels & pulls at the VENT COVER. It won’t budge. She looks around & finds a LARGE METALLIC SOUP LADLE.  SHE JAMS THE LADLE INTO THE VENT, using it like a crowbar. 
JASON: Mommy?
LOIS: JASON DON’T MOVE!
Lois strains to pry the vent away. After what seems like an eternity, it finally pops off. She approaches Jason VERY CAREFULLY.
LOIS (CONT’D): Okay Honey, stay still…
Lois THROWS IT into the air duct … grabs Jason & rushes him to the other side of the room. The explosive drops down a series of air ducts … Silence. Lois and Jason open their eyes, relieved.
Then – BOOOOOOM! THE BLAST ROCKS THE ROOM. A burst of flame shoots from the vent. Lois shields Jason. The flames are followed by a GEYSER OF SEAWATER. The room is tipped upward. Water is streaming in. Lois tumbles backwards into the water, struggling to reach Jason, but she’s STUCK.
ANGLE UNDERWATER: Lois’ leg tangled in a LIFE PRESERVER.
LOIS: HELP ME! Oh God…
Water floods into her mouth. She disappears under the surface when the DOOR is RIPPED OPEN, AND THE SILHOUETTE OF A MAN STEPS INTO THE ROOM. He dives underwater.
The man rips Lois’ leg free from the cables and pulls her to safety. Lois finally opens her eyes and comes face to face with… RICHARD. She and Jason are stunned.
LOIS (CONT’D): How –How did you get here?
RICHARD: (obviously…) I flew.
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Lex’s response to Superman’s son here is more appropriate & threatening.
Another setup & payoff with the missile explosive gives the film more structure. Plot, y'know?
Makes Lois more active
Richard/Clark parallels
Jason recognizes Clark 
[in the seaplane after Superman saves them from the yacht]
Jason curiously looks up at Superman.
JASON: Hey, you look just like–
SUPERMAN: (Cutting him off) Can you fly?
For a moment, it looks like Superman is speaking to Jason – then he turns his head to Richard.
Also in the novelisation (p.285)
More Jason/Clark connection & more payoffs (Jason suspected Clark's identity after seeing him next to Superman on TV earlier)
Context: New Krypton
The script describes it as “almost identical to the ruins of Krypton ... Unlike the ruins, this place feels like it could be full of life – what he hoped to find when he went to Krypton,” with buildings “resembling the Fortress of Solitude”.  made of the Fortress’ glowing white crystals, presenting the facade of life.
Clark confronts Lex in “an exact reproduction of the Kryptonian VALLEY OF ELDERS" (where we saw the El Crest in Return to Krypton). Flickering x-ray vision reveals “IN THE GROUND AND WALLS are pockets and veins of kryptonite” 
From The Visual Guide (p.79):
“New Krypton recreates its planet of origin according to an ancient blueprint, beginning with the vanished capital of Kryptonopolis ... [it] will eventually replicate the towering face of Mount Argo, the bottomless depths of the Xan Chasm, & the polished dome of the Krypton Science Council”
Superman hears something else in the wind, coming from inside the structure: a VOICE. Faint, but familiar. Maybe JOR-EL? LARA? It’s joined by other ghostly whispers before another familiar voice calls out:
LEX (O.S.): See anything familiar?
The ghostly whispers are a cool detail
Now New Krypton is literally a ‘dead world resurrected’, not just some land, & will terraform the whole planet. It brings the movie full-circle- Krypton followed Clark home
After beating a powerless Clark, Lex reveals the truth
LEX (CONT’D): Look, buddy. We sent you there to die, but ya’ had to come back…
Superman looks at Lex, his expression turning from agony to realization.
LEX (CONT’D): Oh yeah. All those photos? Those stories about Krypton still existing? It was me. (Beat) And him.
ANGLE ON: Stanford.
LEX (CONT’D): Thankfully the press doesn’t check facts like they used to. (Beat) Hey, you took away five years of my life. I just returned the favor.
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In the novelisation (p.297) & literally every other adaptation of the story. Why the fuck would you cut it?
As Clark drowns:
“Crystals are growing towards him from every direction. ALL GLOWING GREEN from Kryptonite. He tries swimming to the surface, but he’s too weak. He’s trapped ... A mesh of crystal walls are closing in around him, over him like a tomb."
The tomb is a thematically resonant image (New Krypton = graveyard) & heightens the crystals’ threat
Jason ‘senses’ Clark instead of seeing him from the plane window
In the script, Jason wants to help Clark too- not just Lois & Richard deciding.
Jason looks out the window, pointing down to the water.
JASON: There.
He turns to Lois. Beat. She can’t see anything.
LOIS: You’re sure?
Jason nods. He’s certain.
While Clark in hospital, Lois names ‘New Krypton’
it's gone “into orbit somewhere between Mars & Jupiter. Supposedly it’s laced with Kryptonite & still growing”. 
Again, creates a thematic bookend with 'Old Krypton' in the beginning
Outside the Hospital
Ben Hubbard waits with Martha Kent- you can see his shoulder next to her in the Theatrical Cut
There are shots of Lois, Jason & Martha talking while they're in the crowd- presumably Martha offering support without Lois knowing who she is
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Martha meets her grandson! The two mothers of Kryptonian sons talk!
Bringing Martha & Ben back ties the Smallville section of the movie back into the plot
Final Clois Exchange
SUPERMAN: Thank you, Lois.
Tears well in her eyes, struggling for something to say.
SUPERMAN (CONT’D): It’s alright.
It’s what she’s wanted and needed to hear for years.
It’s such a small thing, but gives Clois closure, and Clark more lines
OTHER CHANGES
Color-grade: Returns’ drab sepia look ruins beautiful cinematography. The original color-grade in the teaser trailer (which is like 70% deleted footage) is much better, as is this color-corrected shuttle sequence
A tighter edit to compensate for the action-light script. They went for a classic, unhurried edit, but you could shave multiple seconds off most shots without losing anything. The Superman Restored fanedit re-inserts 25 mins of deleted scenes and is still 8 mins shorter than the Theatrical Cut
Tldr;
Returns is inherently slow-paced. Even with a faster edit, adding all this would push it past 3 hours. Regardless, Singer shot his own film in the foot because his priorities were wrong: Outlined above is a more balanced, cohesive story with richer themes. The Lex and Krypton subplots are complete. Clark feels like the main character, & Lois is more sympathetic. 
Brandon deserved so much more.
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holalinkkk · 30 days
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Okay I’m seeing a lot of “Stolas shouldn’t have sprung everything onto Blitzø all at once and he should’ve given Blitzø time to process” but 1. This talk was soooo long overdue that it’s better that Stolas was as clear as possible and got everything off of his chest because their communication has been pretty awful thus far and 2. Blitzø was kinda the one who started heavily insulting Stolas while following him down the hallway? I don’t blame Stolas for teleporting Blitzø out, they both were very hurt in the conversation and anything further said probably wasn’t going to help the situation at all. I just hate how the fandom has to make one or the other into the bad person in the relationship like???
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iamvegorott · 4 months
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A sequel to this Danti angst: Link
-----------
“Darkiplier, have you lost your mind!?” Wilford snapped as he stormed into the office, tucking his phone into his back pocket. Marvin had texted him moments ago about what had happened between Dark and Anti. 
“My mind is still intact, and I am working,” Dark stated flatly, having disconnected himself from everything and did his usual routine of sucking himself into work. He knew Wilford was beyond upset with him since he never used full names. 
“One of those statements is a lie; I will make the other the same.” Wilford slammed Dark’s laptop shut and tossed it over to the little couch, not wanting to break it but still adding to his point that he would not be ignored. 
“Wilford, there is no need-”
“What did you do to Anti?” Wilford cut Dark off. 
“I didn’t do anything. I simply put things how they should be to prevent him from getting hurt.” Dark sighed and stood up, prepared to leave the room before the conversation went how he didn’t want it to.
“Well, you failed at that.” Wilford snapped his fingers, and a pink wormhole appeared next to Dark.
“Wil, what are you-Wilford!” Dark snapped as Wilford suddenly grabbed him and shoved his head through the wormhole, having that part of him now at the Septiceye House, observing the scene from the ceiling and hidden from the view of those in the room. 
“Darling, it’ll be okay,” Marvin spoke softly as he rubbed Anti’s back. Anti was curled up a little, face pressed into Mad’s chest, using him to muffle his sobs. The three of them were on the couch.
“He’s an oblivious idiot, and this is coming from me,” Mad said, trying to help lighten the mood as he rubbed Anti’s back with Marvin. 
“I shouldn’t be like this.” Anti sniffed. “I should know better. That it was obvious from the start, but I…I still feel so gross…so used. That I was nothing more than a good fuck even though I literally signed up for that.” 
“Love is complicated, dear.” Marvin said. 
“Why do I have to love him? Why can’t I just hate him? Why couldn’t I just stay neutral and enjoy what we did have? I’m supposed to be heartless, a fucking monster that kills people for money. Why do I have to have these damned feelings that hurt so much?” Anti broke down again at the end, face back into Mad’s chest. 
“I found every single sugary item in the House. Jackie even donated some cookies Phantom made him earlier.” Chase said as he came into the room, arms filled with chocolates, ice cream, and cookies. “How are we doing?” He asked as he sat his collection down on the coffee table. Marvin just shook his head. That was all Chase needed to know. “You guys eat up, and I’m going to shoot Dark in the dick.” 
“Chase, sweetie, no.” Marvin caught the back of Chase’s shirt. 
“Fine, then I’ll just punch him a few times, and if a few of them just so happens to land on his dick, that’s on him.”
“Chase.”
“I have to do something, Marv. The asshole broke Anti’s heart.” Chase protested.
“If you want to do something, turn a movie on and sit with us. Anti needs comfort, not conflict.”
“But-”
“Please.” Marvin gently squeezed Chase’s arm, gesturing his head to Anti. Chase saw how Anti had practically drenched the front of Mad’s shirt with his tears, and his shoulders relaxed.
“Okay. I’ll stay.” 
“Thank you.” 
Dark was yanked back out of the wormhole when Wilford decided he had seen enough. He watched the pink vanish, and it took a few blinks to get the colored dots out of his eyes, vision returning to normal. 
“Prevent him from being hurt? Pretty sure a shattered heart hurts a lot.” Wilford said. 
“It’s better for him to have the pain now than to prolong it and cause it to become worse.” Dark’s head hung, a hand holding the edge of his desk as if that grip was the only thing keeping him standing. 
“What is happening to you? You’re usually a lot smarter with this stuff. Your whole schtick is messing with people’s heads and making them believe that everything you’re saying is for the best. Usually, the only reason why you can’t mess with someone’s head is when you care about them. That’s why you don’t even try with me. So…” Wilford twirled his hand in the air, gesturing for Dark to finish his sentence for him. 
“I can’t get into Anti’s head,” Dark admitted. “I can’t do my schtick, as you put it. I never have been able to. At first, I believed it was sexual attraction, that being the only other reason why I cannot work my abilities, but as time went on, I realized that…” His voice trailed off as he sighed. “It doesn’t matter.” 
“I am kicking both of your shins. Of course, it matters. What did you realize?” Wilford was urging Dark to actually say it. Hard to deny something when you’ve admitted it. 
“I don’t need to say it.” Dark shook his head.
“Say it! Stop hiding from it!” Wilford snapped, walking up to Dark and leaning over to make him look at his face. 
“I care for him, alright?” Dark tried to turn away, but Wilford grabbed his wrist. 
“You care for him?” Wilford’s voice showed he would keep prying until he heard what he wanted.
“I love him, okay!?” Dark yanked his arm free. “I love him, and I am an idiot and a fucking coward! I’m pushing him away because I am afraid. I am scared I’m not good enough, that I don’t know what I’m doing, and I am going to hurt him beyond repair without meaning to.” He stopped and made a face, looking annoyed at himself. “I want him to forget about me and find someone who can make him happy. He deserves to be with someone that can do that. Not with whatever the hell I am.” 
“Well, you’re right about being an idiot.” Wilford clicked his tongue. “But you could reverse that by proving you’re not a coward and talking to Anti about how you really feel.” 
“I can’t do that to him.” 
“Can’t do what? Continue the thing that’s been making both of you the happiest you’ve been in a long time. Ever since you and Anti got over the whole pretending to be hate-fucking thing, you two have been practically bubbly.” Wilford sighed and placed his hands on Dark’s shoulders. “You both love each other, he’s confessed to you and you just told me. Why break something that worked so well together? The only difference is that you’ll have a different label to it. Maybe you’ll kiss a little more outside of bedroom activities, maybe even hold hands and sometimes hang out together on those little things called dates.” 
“But he-”
“Stop saying ‘but’ to everything and go talk to him. You always have so many words. Surely, you can string some of them together and let Anti know what’s happening. He’ll probably be pissed at first, can’t blame him for that, but he’ll understand. Tell him the truth, Dark. Tell him the truth, and it’ll all work out.” Wilford waited as Dark just stood there, looking at him before finally swallowing and saying softly.
“Okay…I’ll talk to him.” 
-----
@ariesshower824 @bookwormscififan
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Day 81.
GOTH BOW.
I used to really get annoyed at one of my former primary care doctors for constantly badgering me about whether there was any correlation between my mood and my energy/pain levels, because there really didn't seem to be any at the time. In hindsight, I realize I was just so burnt out and traumatized back then that I was always one butterfly wing-flap away from a flareup. Hence no apparent correlation. Now, I definitely notice that what's going on in my life makes a difference. Some combination of the trip and my weird brain-rut impacted my ability to stand for practice for a week. It seems to be going away now. I had no problem standing for practice today. Despite it being pretty grueling on my arm practicing being in seventh position.
Also... did I mention I have a Goth bow? That might be helping with the serotonin levels.
It's maybe two or three grams lighter and more evenly weighted than my wood bow. The hair is very grippy and didn't require too much rosin to get started. Sound-wise, it's got a bit of a dark, earthy quality to it, which suits me just fine obvs. This is not like, a super high-end bow but it seems to be a pretty solid one and it's gonna be my default bow for now. Getting it rehaired at some point down the line is going to be... interesting but that's a problem for Future Me LOL.
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l8rs-gat0rs · 6 months
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A Christmas Carol
Pairing: Carol Danvers X reader
Warnings(s): None! just heartwarming fluff to warm your heart this Christmas :') 💚❤️✨
Summary: You're out in New York City with Carol and the biting cold starts to get to you. Thankfully Carol is there to keep your hands warm.
Word count: 1.1k
Merry Christmas!!! I wrote this on Christmas day actually and I didn't even run it through my editor because I was too excited to post it haha (Sorry Lina 😅) This is the winter fic I've been so excited to write!!! Shout out to my fellow NYC besties reading this 🤞🏽 I hope ya'll enjoy this Sapphic fluffy goodness while you wait for the requests, thanks for being so patient :)
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~~~Happy Reading!!!~~~
"wow it's been so long since I've spent a Christmas on earth" Carol said cheerfully.
"Well you're in luck because Christmas in New York City is the best!" You hopped up and down excitedly next to her, causing her to giggle.
"you're so cute" Carol said a you calmed down and continued walking next to her with a smile on your face.
Despite the bitter coldness, your cheeks felt warm at her compliment and you hid your smile in the scarf you had wrapped around your neck.
"awww look at you" Carol gushed, gently bumping her arm into yours.
"shut upppp" You rolled your eyes playfully
You adjusted your winter hat and looked at Carol, who only had on a shield cap, the winter coat you bought her, and her combat boots with her skinny jeans tucked into them.
"You're insane, I can't believe you're not even cold right now. I'm getting cold just looking at you" You shuddered
"What do you mean?" Carol looked down at herself.
"I'm wearing a jacket"
"Yeah but no hat, no scarf, no gloves!?" you pointed out.
"I don't even need this jacket, I think you're forgetting I can generate heat through my powers" Carol chuckled.
"I'm just wearing it because you bought it for me" Carol looked at you and smiled.
You felt your chest swell at her revelation, causing you to grin.
"well, some of us are not as lucky as you. My hands are freezing!!!" you hunched over and rubbed your gloved hands together before blowing into them.
Carol stopped in her tracks, causing you to do the same.
"What happened?" You inquired, confused a bit.
"Come here" She smiled, holding her hands out for you to take them.
"Okay" You chuckled.
You slipped your hands into hers and felt your heart beating quicker as you relished the way your hands fit with hers.
She pulled you closer to her, the mist coming from your breath mixing with the mist from hers.
"Carol..." You felt your face flush, suddenly feeling shy.
Carol slipped her hands that were still holding yours into her pockets and you felt heat warm your fingers.
You gasped and watched as a bright light emanated from her pockets.
"Are they warm now?" Carol whispered causing you to meet her eyes.
"Yes, thank you" You giggled before pressing a sweet kiss to her lips.
When you pulled away you noticed a slight blush on her cheeks.
"Now who's adorable?" You laughed pressing another kiss her cheek.
"Still you!"
You both laughed before you pulled your hands out of her pockets.
"Wait!" Carol said grabbing one of your hands again.
She put her hand, holding yours back in her pocket and you felt the heat once again.
"Lets walk like this" She said.
Your cheeks started to hurt from how hard you were smiling.
"Okay" You obliged, continuing your walk to Bryant Park.
When you arrived at the winter village your eyes lit up.
"Wow this is amazing" Carol breathed out.
"I know right!?" Your eye caught sight of a booth that was selling Christmas ornaments.
"Hey let's go check that out" you raced over to the booth.
"Alright lieutenant" Carol chuckled, following your lead.
You greeted the woman running the booth as you perused the bright and glittery ornaments.
Your eyes settled on one in the shape that Carol dawned on every mission.
"Ah we just made a couple of those captain marve-" the woman's mouth jaw dropped as Carol walked into the booth and wrapped her arm around your waist.
"We need to get this one." You showed Carol.
"No way! That's so embarrassing" Carol groaned.
"Come onnnnn"
"Do you personalize these?" You turned to the woman behind the register.
She closed her mouth and looked away from Carol, meeting your eyes.
"Uh yes ma'am, there's actually a hatch in the back, you can put a picture in it. You can also write on it with a sharpie. " she explained.
You turned the ornament around In your hand and noticed the hatch.
"Wow, these are great, I didn't even notice the hatch !" You marveled.
The woman smiled.
"Thank you, they're all handmade by my daughter and I"
"Wow" Carol said taking the ornament in her hand as you handed it to her.
"We'll take that one" you smiled.
"Of course!"
The woman wrapped the ornament up as you slid some cash on the counter.
"Thank you for your purchase, Merry Christmas!" The woman said gleefully waving to you, as you and Carol waved back and left the booth, wishing her the same.
"I can't wait to put this on our tree" you hopped.
Carol smiled fondly at your excitement.
Her eyes wondered until she caught sight of a booth selling hot chocolate.
"Now there's something you can warm your hands up with, without powers." Carol pointed.
Your eyes followed her finger before lighting up at the sight of the booth.
You grabbed her hand and quickly made your way to the booth.
You shook with excitement while waiting on the line, making Carol laugh.
"Two hot chocolates please!" You asked the man behind the register excitedly.
He smiled and took your card, swiping it before handing it back to you.
"I could have paid those" Carol frowned.
"Well hot chocolate is my superpower" you booped her nose, causing the smile to return to her face.
"Okay fineeee" Carol rolled her eyes playfully.
The man handed you two cups of hot chocolate with whipped cream on top, wishing you both a merry Christmas.
"Thank you! merry Christmas!" You called out, Carol doing the same.
You stood on the side of the busy walkway with Carol and slowly sipped the warm liquid, feeling it warm up your insides as it went down.
You closed your eyes and smiled before opening them.
You saw Carol looking down at her cup before taking a Sip.
Her eyes brightened as she pulled her head up, meeting your eyes.
"Wow this is good!"
You covered your mouth, stifling your laughs, causing Carol to look at you with a confused look on her face.
"What?"
"Hold on, you got something..." You giggled before reaching out your finger, swiping the whipped cream from Carol's nose and sticking your finger in your mouth.
Carol's cheeks turned dark red.
"Oh..." She muttered.
You laughed, kissing her cheek once more before continuing your walk around the winter village.
You eventually caught sight of the Ice rink.
You chugged the rest of your now, cold, chocolate, and threw the cup out before taking Carol's hand in yours.
"Come on captain, you can fly, but can you ice skate?"
"Oh you're on baby" Carol smirked, throwing her empty cup out as well.
~~~~~
Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays✨ 💝😊
Tag list: @mxqdii
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A list of Jesse Eisenberg's writing
I made a list of Jesse Eisenberg's writing.
2009
NOV 30 Manageable Tongue Twisters.
2010
FEB 24 Marxist-Socialists Jokes
2011
JUL 21 A Post Gender Normative Man Tries to Pick Up a Woman at a Bar
DEC 07 ACTOR & PLAYWRIGHT JESSE EISENBERG ON THE THRILL OF THE STAGE
2012
JAN 25 Courage Is Just an Act
FEB 15 Jeremy Lin Has Helped Me Through Some Pretty Tough Times
MAR 12 Jesse Eisenberg on His Lifelong Aversion to Youth Culture
MAY 24 Sushi Nozawa
JUN 06 Masgouf
JUL 09 The Whiskey Blue Bar at the W Hotel
AUG 01 TCBY
AUG 20 Robert Frost Elementary School Cafeteria
OCT 02 Organix vs. the San Gennaro Street Festival
NOV 21 Thanksgiving With Vegans
DEC 11 Body Rituals Among the Lauxesortem
2013
FEB 22 Matthew’s House
MAR 17 Marv Albert Is My Therapist
APR 15 The League, Passed Down
APR 17 I Didn’t Win Any Pulitzer Prizes This Year
APR 25 A Marriage Counselor Tries to Heckle at a Knicks Game
JUN 03 Fuddruckers and an Unreliable New Friend
JUN 24 Separation-Anxiety Sleepaway Camp
AUG 06 A Crawfish Boil and Dad’s New Family
SEP 09 A Bully Does His Research
OCT 02 A Post Gender Normative Woman Tries to Pick Up a Man at a Bar
OCT 07 Final Conversations at Pompeii
NOV 01 The Museum of Natural History and Making Compromises
NOV 12 Alexander Graham Bell’s First Five Phone Calls
DEC 12 The Ashram and Mom
2014
JAN 20 If I Was Fluent in . . .
JUN 10 Carmelo Anthony and I Debrief Our Friends After a Pickup Game at the Y.M.C.A.
2015
MAY 25 Men and Dancing
SEP 01 My Nephew Has Some Questions
SEP 09 My Spam Plays Hard to Get
NOV 22 THE GUY WHO HATED NOW YOU SEE ME, A SHORT STORY
NOV 23 An Honest Film Review
2016
JAN 27 What Do You Do When Your Mother Won’t Shut Up at The Ballet?
FEB 04 Act Like You Know
FEB 12 Why I Broke Up with the Little Mermaid
MAY 19 My Cousin Recently Became A Realtor
NOV 04 SELF-DEPRECATING HEROES
DEC 11 LOW TALK IN HIGH PLACES
2017
JAN 23 YOU NEVER REALLY KNOW
JAN 25 My Very Good Friend
FEB 01 发现肉——致中国读者
MAR 04 HAVE YOU DINED WITH US BEFORE?
NOV 14 Mongolia
2018
JAN 15 Sad Stuff on the Street
MAR 20 Thanks, Giving
MAY 14 My N.B.A. Knowledge Comes In Handy
MAY 18 One Small Blow Against Encroaching Totalitarianism: The Natural Order of the World Depends On It
MAY 31 Jesse Eisenberg on the Relentless Work Ethic of Philip Roth
DEC 05 The Cast Members and Their Crew
2019
JAN 03 MY SISTER PUSHES THE LOBSTER
NOV 21 My Two-Year-Old Requests Just One More Song Before Bed
NOV 23 Jesse Eisenberg: Recommends four contemporary plays
2021
MAR 02 Writer Courtney Zoffness and Jesse Eisenberg on the Radical Compassion of Art
2022
NOV 07 Content Warning
2023
FEB 20 A G.P.S. Route for My Anxiety
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dogwhizzer · 2 years
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make no mistake if this keeps up marvs gonna have him in a headlock in like five seconds flat
[id: digital art of marvin and whizzer brown from the musical falsettos. whizzer is a tall, built man with light brown skin and wavy brown hair, speckled with bits of gray. he is wearing a yellow button up with the sleeves rolled up and several buttons unbuttoned, revealing both curly arm and chest hair. he is also wearing dark jeans and belt with a large buckle depicting a crude image of a bull. marvin is a short, pudgy middle aged man with pale skin and curly medium length light brown hair. he is wearing a pink button up with the sleeves rolled up, as well as light jeans and a belt. whizzer is standing to the left of marvin and is leaning into him, squishing the side of his face into the side of marvin's head. he has a big smile on his face and his eyes are squeezed shut. his right arm is looped around marvin's waist and he is fiddling with the belt loops of marvin's jeans. marvin has his face turned away from whizzer. his eyes are closed and he is smiling and blushing, and he has covered the bottom part of his face with his right hand. he is jabbing his left elbow into whizzer's chest to get whizzer off of him. to the left of whizzer's head is a speech bubble directed towards him. it reads, 'you're so pretty'. there are also two hearts inside of the bubble. to the right of marvin's head is various text, reading, 'cut it out', 'shut up', 'no no', 'stop', and 'no i'm not'.
id 2: the same as before, but without the text. /end id]
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