#show me the birth certificate
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
Hatshesput: the Forgotten Pharaoh
Start time: 2:46 PM
End time: 3:25 PM
Guest: Ryann Graham
we go from Ryan to Bergara to Arbies to Beef Man
still Ryan to me
Ryan is already getting fed up with McNasty not knowing his facts
he did better this time
Ryan is also getting fed up with the point giving
Ryan isn't going to win this one, but Ryann will
why does Ryan know about J-Lo bathing in milk
where did that come from?
answer: left field
ok so McNasty eats primarily Jelly Beans
yea Ryann is definitely winning this one
"thanks for the words of wisdom there Beef Man"
Another special sex pal
"show me the birth certificate"
wtf why is Don Draper here
but it's just some white guy in a suit
so McNasty is a bad boy now
the totally unconvincing way McNasty said, "not that I ever met her personally"
so maybe he can time travel
are they like magic jelly beans that give you like time power or sm
if so why are you giving them out left and right
little misogyny
history is sad
"you know how easy it is to kill a baby?"
very suspicious McNasty
ok beef boy
Ryan is mad about now being Beef Boy
"the mystery as to why her legacy was erased remains...not fully understood"
I see what you did there McNasty
wow a mummified goose
the song is alright
it reminds me of things that we would have to watch to learn things in elementary
ofc Ryann won
"try knowing more"
no need to get violent Ry- sorry Beef Boy
#Val's Puppet History Weekend#watcher entertainment#puppet history#Beef Man#another special sex pal#show me the birth certificate#you know how easy it is to kill a baby#liveblog#beef boy
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
sooo close to writing a whole damn expose of how shafted you are as a british citizen if you don't own a passport. like i get that passports are a useful way of proving your id. but some of us are poor and can't afford one. and then we're told that without it we can't prove our right to work, here, in the uk, where we've basically never left?????? im losing my fucking mind
#i've been doing a job for like two weeks straight for uni#barely doing anything else#and now they're telling me they can't prove my right to work#so as it stands idek if i'll get paid. for all this work i've done.#fucking tapped country#the only alternative they've given me is to travel down in person to show them my birth certificate#oh and btw that's 315 miles <3
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
How the fuck do demigods get their birth certificates.
Do their parents just rock up and say this is my kid and when they ask who the father is say a fucking tree I guess??!!
#This genuinely keeps me up at night#Of course this doesn't apply to kids who are actually born#But like is Annabeth straight up undocumented??#Percy Jackson and the 16 hour wait at the DMVA trying to get a licence without a birth certificate#Percy jackson#Percy Jackson and the olympians#Annabeth chase#pjo tv show
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
Today was a horrible rollercoaster, I have bought $35 worth of soup and I will be drinking tonight. Vodka, I’ll be drinking vodka to help get over this day and I will have soup as a chaser or something.
#daily life of Blep#it started good#and then I got on Snapchat#for reference#I’m non-binary#and I guess I didn’t tell my grandmother and when I told her#she did not seem care or try to understand#and immediately shot me with#“well on your birth certificate’’#and then asked how I was#I was having a good day with my friend#but now I’m about to cry in front of her after shopping for some clothes in a restaurant I wanted to show her#I left her on fuckin seen#vent post#personal vent#don’t respond#I just had to get this off my chest#I bought a lot of soup though#the vodka will be cold now#I would also like to clarify that I will be playing a drinking game to a show#and I will not be guzzling it#I shall drink responsibly#kinda??
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
SHAKING AND TREMBLING I PRESSED THE TUMBLR LIVE BUTTON (not a fan of the feature btw) AND THEY LET ME CHANGE MY AGE HAHAHAHA FINALLY
#ihe been trying to get them to let me change my age for six months#they had me being born in 2005#i was ready to show them my birth certificate
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
As soon as it reaches my city of birth, it becomes official
Three more months with my lame ass birth name
#then a week or two for processing and getting a new birth certificate so i can get a new id#german bureaucracy my beloved#german stuff#bundesTag#trans#transgender#also shoutout to the very nice worker there who let me file it even though I accidentally showed up an hour late#the one time i dont quadruple check an appointment time ffs#anyway congrats to all the other german trans folks who are slowly but surely getting their names and genders recognized!!#crimes against the gender convention
165 notes
·
View notes
Text
Causing problems in my life by using female with scare quotes when just talking about any women presenting person. If I did that anywhere but my own home I’d prolly end up in a ditch with how gender sensitive cis society is.
It’s kinda just slid into my regular speech so apropos of nothing I’ll be like “I want a “””female””” doctor,” Scare quoting with my hands.
Which just means I want a doctor that presents femininely. Intersex, trans, nb, whatever so long as they aren’t a rude older cis man that thinks hormones are dangerous as an endocrinologist.
Spices up conversations that mean nothing completely on accident. Like spilling too much pepper into soup.
#when I just mean a lady doctor. but somehow female with scare quotes is the gender I want my doctor to be and yeah true#I don’t want a female doctor I want a scary doctor that happens to be suspicious. I want a doctor that seems one thing but maybe isn’t#but I want maybe to do a lot of heavy lifting in the sentence#just a regular lady doctor but she happened to be at the olympics- lady doctor but won’t show me her birth certificate#just a regular lady doctor but she’s queer in a way she won’t identify. lady doctor but everyone called them a tomboy growing up#a regular lady doctor but she’s 6 raccoons in a lab coat and no one’s noticed they steal medical waste#a regular lady doctor but she’s not real#also was blocking lots of incel like people. cannot believe there are adults that use femoid and moids. creepy stuff#their way of talking is contagious because you can’t help but say it aloud as a verbal tick
0 notes
Text
tryna decide if i cba to get a super special dbs where my birth name isnt on the certificate or if i should not bother since the ppl hiring me are the ones confirming my identity so theyre gonna see it anyway
#like its not whether or not my employer sees it bc they have to so idk if i should bother#i literally changed my name when i was 16 why tf is it still hanging around me#i havent done any crimes i pinky swear#im literally gonna have to tell everyone i get a dbs for for the rest of my entire life like come on#i wish it became void after like 10 years or something#like a sealed record#no one needs to know that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i promise you do not need to know#also i dont want them to be like why is ur last name the same as ur old bosses#i cld just say hes my uncle or something? thats better than dad#but theyll find out if i have to show them my birth certificate bc of the name change#can they rescind the job offer bc im related to my old boss? i didnt tell them but i didnt lie cuz they never asked#goddddddddd#i hate all this so much#why do you have to be in my business like this
1 note
·
View note
Text
This case is making me so fucking angry. theyre using common transphobic language, and also theyre not even HIDING their BLATANT FUCKING TRANSPHOBIA-
Wanna see the poster that made me aware of this current bullshit going on?
The second paragraph. 'Roxy Tickle is a man that wants to be a woman.' Okay, well a simple google search says shes transgender. Going a bit more in depth? She has done Three years of hormone therapy and gender reaffirmation surgery. Like this isnt a transgender woman who has done nothing to change her identity, she's got surgery and 3 years of hormone therapy! And looking more into it? She has said;
"I am now legally a woman.
“I am already allowed to have a female gendered passport thanks to the letter from my GP confirming that they are treating me.
“I only have one step left - to update my birth certificate to say that I’m female.
“I needed two medical specialists saying they have seen my genitals and they both needed to sign a form in the presence of a JP.
"These are the most extreme levels of identity proof I’ve ever come across – to have to show your genitals to an MD is embarrassing to prove who you are. The documentation has all now been completed and I will mail it this weekend."
That was all 4 years ago. 7 years of this shit now. (as of today, april 11th, 2024)
And the poster still refers to her as a he?
And thats the picture they use. Now heres a better one.
That was deliberate. They used an unflattering photo of her, and a very flattering one of Sall, just to try and tip people to Salls side. Common marketing ploy.
More research shows that she now has her birth certificate identifying her as female.
And this isnt enough?
By her logic, shouldnt a trans man be allowed on giggle, no matter how far through transitioning they are, purely because they were born female? I get the feeling that she would say no. This is simply blatant transphobia. Personally, I cant do anything, being a minor. I'm not sure how far this case is along, seeing as it started 2 days ago.
But I simply cant let this slide. When I saw it this afternoon it made me so fucking angry.
This case could change a lot of things. Make a lot of changes that make everything far worse for non cis gendered people, potentially influencing things world wide
#roxy tickle#roxanne tickle#giggles for girls#sall grover#transphobia#trans rights#australia#australia politics#tw transphobia
10K notes
·
View notes
Text
Things that I feel like would happen when you’re in a relationship with Simon Riley.
Simon Riley masterlist
1. First off he hates the word ‘boyfriend’.
Maybe it’s because he’s in his mid thirties or something but he can’t stand being called your boyfriend. He’s more than that but also not at the same time. You live together, have access to each other’s bank accounts (which is only because he hates it when you try to fight him about him giving you money), and you’re each others emergency contact. He thinks of himself as your husband. The man wears a silicone ring when he’s home and a necklace with the ring that’s totally not a wedding band when he’s working. Price has seen the chain once or twice and smirks, shooting him a knowing look but never says a word.
Simon cannot stand it when people get nosy and want to know what your relationship status is. You’re together and that’s all that matters. No one needs to know that you’re the beneficiary of his will and life insurance policy or that he’s put you on all of his accounts. No one needs to know that he buys you anything you want but has only ever bought you two rings; a thin gold band with a flower engraved on it and its twin a matching emerald ring. No one needs to know that when he gifted them to you, there were tears and promises of safety, love, and happiness whispered against feverish skin. No one needs to know that he has your name woven into his chest tattoo.
No one needs to know any of that because your relationship is between him and you only.
2. You are not some submissive little house wife. You are a strong independent woman and he prefers it that way.
I know this one goes against what most people say but hear me out on this. Simon has been independent since birth practically. He’s only had himself to count on for years. Even in the military, he’s only been able to rely himself. Sure the others watch out for him but if it came down to it, he’s the only one who’s going to get himself out alive.
The thought of someone else relying on him in that way is terrifying. He can’t even fathom what it would be like to look at another person and fully trust them in that way. Half the time he feels like he can’t even be trusted to take care of himself let alone another human. In theory a sweet docile housewife is great with the meals and clean house but not for him. He needs to know that you can hold your own. He needs to know that you can be independent and carry on without him if something happened while he was working. He needs to know that you will be okay if he doesn’t come back.
You have to be okay without him no matter how much it pains him to think about it.
Like I said before, he’s made you the beneficiary of everything so he knows you’ll be set financially but that’s not enough. He’s made Price promise to keep an eye out for you. He’s made you promise to let Price do that and you agreed because it’s Simon who’s asking but you’d tell anyone else to fuck off.
In addition to all of that, he’s installed the best security system the government has to offer in your house. You have a very expensive and large safe in your shared closet that he’s instructed you to only open if you feel unsafe. While you might not like it, you agree to go shooting with him so he can sleep at night knowing that you could protect yourself if he’s not home. He’s gone as far as to make sure you have all of the licenses and certificates that are needed to legally own firearms in the UK.
He’s not leaving any opportunity for you to be vulnerable or have your ‘safety checks’, as he calls them, taken away.
3. Simon Riley is a godless man…until he meets you.
Now this is entirely my own headcannon with no evidence to support it so bear with me.
Simon had a shitty childhood where his mom would pray to a god who never listened and his dad would shout verses at him when he was drunk. God was a mythical figure that he was told stories off with nothing to show for it. He did believe at one point but then his dad never got better, his mom wore bruises of every shade, and his brother found comfort in drugs.
He found himself praying when he was being tortured by the Mexican cartel. Between the flashbacks of his abusive past, he prayed to a god who had failed him so many times before to help him. He prayed again as he dug himself out of that Texas grave with the major’s jaw bone. He wailed his prayers when he found his family executed after Sparks tried to kill him.
After that he deemed himself a Godless man. Years of praying had passed with nothing. This god had decided that Simon was not worthy of a miracle so why would he continue to worship him?
That was until he met you. He finds himself praying before every mission, every time he has to leave you, every time he’s on his way home, and just about any other time he thinks of you. He doesn’t know what exactly he’s praying for other than for you to be there when he gets back.
He whispers his prayers to an absent god against your skin as he worships your body, soul, and heart. He promises to be devoted to you until his last breath and vows to find you again in whatever afterlife awaits you. He pledges to find solace in you and only you when his haunting nightmares return. He makes an oath to your heart that it will never weather another storm alone again for his will take whatever beating that comes your way. He shows you that he will love you in the same manner as a Hozier song; putting you above all else because you have become his religion, his faith, his beliefs, his life.
You have become all that he is and he thanks the god he once believed in for you. He prays again but to you, his heart, his love, and his beacon through the enteral storm of life.
#simon riley x you#simon ghost x reader#simon riley x female reader#simon riley imagine#simon riley x reader#simon ghost riley#simon riley#ghost imagine#ghost call of duty#ghost x reader#ghost cod#ghost#ghost x female reader
8K notes
·
View notes
Text
I'm almost done with my transition paperwork. it's been nearly a year since i started. we live in an evil bureaucratic hellscape
#I've had to do some stuff thrice because apparently people either can't program or use computers properly#the actual birth certificate and id took a couple of months#everything else took forever#the bank fucked up my name on my debit card twice#they made up a whole new middle name and put it on everything#i had to complain like 5 times about that one cause it kept showing up anywhere#my uni made me wait three months to figure out how to comply with the nonbinary ids on their degrees and then harassed me for two weeks#about a picture#my name's still showing up wrong in parts of the system they use at work#because some people can't read i guess#i gotta send an email about that actually#i even had to update my name at the supermarket which i hadn't even added to the list when i started#i was just grocery shopping one day and realized the cashier was calling me by the wrong name#i think all that's left now are the utilities#and waiting for everything else to be done#like my degree needs to be signed by the usual 6838282 people now#but i can see the finish line#it was all worth it btw i love seeing my name on everything#i even had to turn in my old degree at my uni it felt like a sendoff#I'll see if i can save up and invite my friends over to celebrate#alex txt
1 note
·
View note
Text
Play Pretend | Charles Leclerc x Law Student! Reader
Summary: He's Lightning McQueen. You're Elle Woods. But, when Charles misses you, he makes it known that perhaps your career isn't as important as his wishes to start a family.
Warnings: Swearing. Angst. Baby fever? Miscommunication.
Female reader with various faceclaims. Pics found on Pinterest.
2024 but some events switched around
I'm trying to make all of these different to each other so I'm sorry that this one was less baby fever and more baby mention.
Main Masterlist
next.
━━━━━━ ༻𖥸༺ ━━━━━━
YourUserName just posted
liked by maxverstappen1, francisca.cgomes and others
YourUserName the cause of stress v. the support systems tagged: charles_leclerc, YourBestFriend
6,883 comments
User1 i love how all her captions ft her degree are legal themed
charles_leclerc ❤️💛
charles_leclerc mon ange, what are you doing in that second photo
→ YourUserName it’s probably best you don’t know, char
→ YourBestFriend cocktails were involved
→ charles_leclerc this is why i don’t like leaving her with you
→ YourBestFriend cry me a river, vroom vroom boy
lilymhe i still think i would be a better support system than charles
→ YourUserName and i fully agree. let’s run away together
→ alex_albon whoa, whoa, whoa. get your own girlfriend
→ charles_leclerc she already has her own girlfriend!
→ charles_leclerc wait, no
→ User2 the prettiest girlfriend
User3 i swear charles and y/n are the cutest f1 couple
→ User4 they always look so infatuated with each other
→ User5 umm, how? she's literally never at races
→ User6 because she’s off being successful in her own way, and charles supports that? plus, she’s always snapped in ferrari merch on race days whether she’s there or not
→ User7 omg yes! when a classmate took a pic of her leaving a final in bright red, and she was easily the most spottable person in that hall
━━━━━━ ༻𖥸༺ ━━━━━━
charles_leclerc just posted
liked by pierregasly, arthur_leclerc and others
charles_leclerc welcome home baby leo tagged: YourUserName
12,298 comments
YourUserName my two favourite boys ❤️
User8 did you see in the background of one of the pics, they have his “birth certificate” framed and it says leo leclerc-y/l/n. he truly is their child
roscoelovescoco can’t wait’s to see’s a new’s friend in’s the paddock’s
→ User9 roscoe-leo play date when please
→ User10 not until 2025 😂
User11 but let’s all take a moment to appreciate how cool leo’s parents are. he has an f1 racer for a dad, and a fashionable law student for a mum
→ User12 haha his parents are lightning mcqueen and elle woods
pierregasly thanks mate. now kika is going to want one
→ YourUserName and you should give her one. i need a mum friend
User13 first they adopt ollie and now leo. who’s next
→ YourUserName oscar
━━━━━━ ༻𖥸༺ ━━━━━━
User1 the interviewer was asking about future races and charles wasted no time in bringing up his girlfriend. he’s so down bad
User2 the way his face lights up when he talks about her. he really does love her.
User3 oh Charles, honey, that’s not giving what you think it is
User4 any other woman slightly uncomfortable with the way this was worded?
→ User5 lets all take a moment to remember that english isn’t his first language. he obviously meant well, and the love in his eyes shows that he’s excited about a life with y/n, it just wasn’t worded in the best way
User6 the interviewer was so skeezy for that last comment though
User7 i feel so bad for y/n. she’s always so supportive of charles' races, even when she’s not there, and charles is talking about how he can't wait for her to be done with her degree so she can follow him around the world
→ User8 i don’t think he meant it that way. he looked horrified when the interviewer interpreted it that way but the interview ended before he could clarify further
User9 do we think mom and dad are fighting after his *slightly* misogynistic comments about making her a kept woman
→ User10 i really hope not but my heart says yes because he basically said he’ll turn her into a travel wife who only cares about his career but said nothing about her career that she’s working really hard on
User11 i didn’t realise how much i depended on y/n’s post race posts until i didn’t get one
→ User12 she always posts the most panty-dropping post race charles pics
User13 i miss them already
━━━━━━ ༻𖥸༺ ━━━━━━
User1 oh god, it’s official
User2 brb just gonna go cry my eyes out for an hour
User3 literally half of her insta posts have disappeared because they were all charles
→ User4 the only thing keeping me sane is that any post where he wasn’t the main focus but slightly in them have been kept
User5 can someone check on ollie? see how he’s coping as a child of divorce
liked by OllieBearman
User6 yes, yes. this is all very sad but now that i’m done crying, can we talk about what is going to happen with leo? is this going to be a shared custody agreement?
→ User7 how could i forget about leo. do you think they’ll see each other at child drop off or make arthur be the middle man?
User8 i can't believe they just got a puppy together and now they’re going to be co-parenting instead :(
User9 maybe this is just a minor speed bump in the road to their everlasting happiness? (yes, i’m hoping that they’re simply taking a small break)
→ User10 may all your delulus come trululu
━━━━━━ ༻𖥸༺ ━━━━━━
YourUserName just posted
liked by lilymhe, arthur_leclerc and others
YourUserName the verdict is unanimous… I’m stressing
3,880 comments
YourBestFriend this barbies practices law
→ YourBestFriend not long left, babe. just a couple of exams and we’re qualified adults
→ YourUserName i don’t think we should ever be classed as qualified adults lol
→ YourMum i still can't get over the fact that you two used to play pretend lawyers as little girls and now you're actually going to be one
lilymhe good luck, y/n. you’re gonna smash these!
→ YourUserName if not, fancy running me over with your golf cart?
arthur_leclerc good luck, y/n/n. try not to drink too much caffeine
→ YourUserName i’m not that bad!
→ arthur_leclerc you cannot lie to me. i have had to listen to you after three red bulls
→ landonorris betrayal!
User1 she’s so real for that last slide tho. like miss y/l/n you are gorgeous and we’re glad you know it
YourClassmate how do you look so nice despite being in the library until 2am?
→ User2 dude, no. that line is not going to pull the stunning y/n y/l/n
→ User3 literally, the love of her life is charles leclerc and this guy thinks he’s going to win her over with a bad line
User4 guys, is anyone else missing the sweet comments charles would always leave
→ User5 he would be agreeing with the last slide and telling her how beautiful and smart she is
→ User6 how about we don’t remind her of her ex-boyfriend the day before her life-changing exams
carlossainz55 good luck🤞🏼
→ User7 not sainz being messy on main
━━━━━━ ༻𖥸༺ ━━━━━━
charles_leclerc just posted
liked by pierregasly, scuderiaferrari and others
charles_leclerc there is nothing like racing in italy for ferrari. i wish we had a better result, but that was the maximum today. we’ll try again next week.
8,449 comments
User9 did you see his interview of him on his way out of the paddock? man was in a rush with poor leo tucked under his arm
→ User10 it’s y/n’s week with leo so charles was running out there because it was time to go see his favourite girl
→ User11 he was not wasting a minute to see the love of his life
User12 charles racing faster to go see his ex-girlfriend who he’s wildly obsessed with than he did all weekend
→ User13 bestie you better pray he doesn’t see this
→ User14 why? ‘cause he’ll have to fight the urge to like it
User15 i’m so happy that it’s y/n’s week with leo because we’re going to get the most adorable puppy pics on her story all week
→ User16 also it means that his parents will be conversing
User17 i love that we’re all depending on leo to get f1’s favourite couple back together
Baby Fever Angst Series
(This wasn’t due out until tomorrow but I’ve released it earlier in honour of THE MONACO WIN BABY!!!!!!) 🥳🍾🥳🍾
Tag list
@lav3nder-haze @minkyungseokie @callsignwidow @luvrrish @fall-bambi @evans-dejong @sadsierra2 @justdreamersdream @spookystitchery @dark-night-sky-99 @raizelchrysanderoctavius @elijahslover @luckyladycreator2 @bborra @mrosales16 @reguluscrystals @brsr @tvdtw4ever @alwaysclassyeagle @gigicisneros @spanishcorndogs @dullypully @thecubanator2 @goldenharrysworld @awritingtree @jxnellat @sbrn0905 @hc-dutch @mxdi0 @buckybarnessweetheart @ironmaiden1313 @dreamercrowd @yourbane @glow-ish
#baby fever angst#formula 1#f1#formula 1 smau#f1 smau#formula 1 social media au#f1 social media au#social media au imagine#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 headcanon#formula 1 drabble#formula 1 one shot#formula 1 fluff#formula 1 x reader#f1 imagine#f1 drabble#f1 headcanon#f1 one shot#f1 fluff#f1 x reader#charles leclerc#charles leclerc imagine#charles leclerc drabble#charles leclerc headcanon#charles leclerc one shot#charles leclerc fluff#charles leclerc smau#charles leclerc x reader
3K notes
·
View notes
Text
god can someone explain how to use insurance cards at appointments all that. im getting absolutely no guidance rn
#aesthetic rambles#teehee when i have to do everything myself bc no one provides even a decent explanation im gonna THROW UP#im sso fucking mad#first i had to email my college to get my deadname off the alt email address and THEN to even get access to an orientation that was mandato#-ry THEN i finally got to choose classes and thankfully the ppl helping me were rlly nice#and then my birth certificate shit has been hellish and just a back and forth#where im getting forwarded to 6573698 diff emails and then a 'um we dont have that' so i had to-#uno reverse and show them the fucking document saying they should have a certified copy and wowww im losing my mind#bc suddenly its bombshell over bombshell where ppl arent explaining anything until i fail and then its like 'um actually u could-'#SHUT UP SHUT UP JUST TELL ME BEFOREHAND SO I DONT LOOK STUPID#im soooo mad i think im genuinely just gonna cry
0 notes
Text
19 October 2023: In Gaza, we have grown accustomed to war
Horrific experiences of death and destruction have permanently impacted Palestinians’ culture, language and collective memory. “Is it war again?” asks my little Amal, 7, memories of the previous Israeli assaults still fresh in her mind.
The wording of the question shows the maturity she has been forced to develop. Last year, Amal asked her mum if it was “another war.”
Yes, it is war again in Gaza! In Gaza, we have grown accustomed to war. War has become a recurrent reality, a nightmare that won’t go away. A brutal normality. War has become like a grumpy old relative, one that we can’t stand but can’t rid ourselves of either.
The children pay the heaviest price. A price of fear and nonstop trauma that is reflected in their behaviors and their reactions. It’s estimated that over 90 percent of Palestinian children in Gaza show signs of trauma. But also, specialists claim there is no post-war trauma in Gaza as the war is still ongoing.
My grandmother would tell me to put on a heavy sweater because it would rain. And it would rain! She, like all Palestinian elders, had a unique sense, an understanding of the earth, wind, trees and rain. The elders knew when to pick olives for pickling or for oil. I was always envious of that.
Sorry, Grandma. We have instead become attuned to the vagaries of war. This heavy guest visits us uninvited, unwelcomed and undesired, perches on our chests and breaths, and then claims the lives of many, in the hundreds and thousands.
A Palestinian in Gaza born in 2008 has witnessed seven wars: 2008–2009, 2012, 2014, 2021, 2022, 2023A and 2023B. And as the habit goes in Gaza, people can be seven wars old, or four wars old. My little Amal, born in 2016, now holds a BA in wars, having lived through four destructive campaigns. In Gaza, we often speak about wars in terms of academic degrees: a BA in wars, an MA in wars, and some might humorously refer to themselves as PhD candidates in wars.
Our discourse has significantly changed and shifted. At night, when Israel particularly intensifies the bombardment, it’s a “party”: “The party has begun.” “It will be a horrific party tonight.” And then there is “The Bag,” capital T and capital B. This is a bag that is hurriedly prepared to contain the cash, the IDs, the birth certificates and college diplomas. The aim is to grab the kids and one item when there is a threat of evacuation.
The collective memories and culture of Palestinians in Gaza have been substantially impacted by these horrific experiences of war and death. Most Gazans have lost family members, relatives, or loved ones or have had their homes damaged or destroyed. It’s estimated that these wars and the escalations between them have claimed the lives of over 9,000 (it was 7,500 when I started drafting this last week!) Palestinians and destroyed over 60,000 housing units.
Death and war. War and Death. These two are persona non grata, yet we can’t force them to leave. To let us be.
Palestinian poet Tamim Al-Barghouti summarizes the relationship between death and the Palestinians that war brings (my translation):
It was not wise of you, Death, to draw near.
It was not wise to besiege us all these years.
It was not wise to dwell this close,
So close we’ve memorized your visage
Your eating habits
Your time of rest
Your mood swings
Your heart’s desires
Even your frailties.
O, Death, beware!
Don’t rest that you tallied us.
We are many.
And we are still here
[Seventy] years after the invasion
Our torches are still alight
Two centuries
After Jesus went to his third grade in our land
We have known you, Death, too well.
O, Death, our intent is clear:
We will beat you,
Even if they slay us, one and all.
Death, fear us,
For here we are, unafraid.
23 October 2023: Five stages of coping with war in Gaza
Our familiarity with war in Gaza has led us to develop a unique perspective and unique coping mechanisms.
We can identify five major emotional stages that Gazans go through during these grim conflicts. The stages are denial, fear, silence, numbness, hope, despair and submission.
This is day 16 and Israel has killed more than 5,000 Palestinians (many are still unaccounted for under the rubble), including over 2,000 Palestinian children, Gaza authorities tell us. More than 15,000 were injured and over 25,000 Palestinian homes were destroyed. And Israel says it is ready for ground invasion.
Stage one: Denial
In the early stages of a crisis, there is often a sense of denial. We convince ourselves that this time won’t lead to war. People are tired of the recurring conflicts, and both sides may appear too preoccupied to engage in warfare. As missiles fall and soar, we maintain a form of partial denial, hoping that this time will not be as lengthy or devastating as past wars.
No, this time it’s not going to be war. Everyone is tired of wars. Israel is too busy to go to war.
Palestinians are too exhausted and too battered to engage in a war. It could just last five days, give or take, we hope.
Stage two: Fear
Soon, denial turns to fear as the reality of another war sets in. Gaza is paralyzed as civilians, including children, are attacked by Israeli bombs. The pictures and videos of massacres, of homes obliterated with the families inside, of high rise buildings toppled like dominoes turn the denial into utter terror.
Every strike, especially at night, means all the children wake up crying and weep. As parents, we fear for our kids and we fear we can’t protect our loved ones.
Stage three: Silence and numbness
This is when Israel particularly intensifies the bombing of civilian homes. Stories are interrupted. Prayers are cut short. Meals are left uneaten. Showers are abandoned.
Therefore, amid the chaos and danger Israel brings, many in Gaza, especially children, withdraw into silence. They find solace in solitude as means of coping with the overwhelming emotion and uncertainty that surrounds them. Silence prevails.
Then numbness follows. As people attempt to protect themselves from the constant onslaught of distressing news, they grow indifferent. Because we could die anyway, no matter where we go. Emotional numbness sets in, as individuals attempt to detach from their emotions to survive.
Stage four: Hope
In the midst of despair, glimmers of hope may emerge. Even in the darkest moments, Gazans may hold onto the belief Israel might at least kill fewer people, bomb fewer places, and damage less. The most hopeful of us wish for a lasting ceasefire or an end to the siege or even the occupation. But this is merely hope. And hope is dangerous.
We hope that politicians will man up. We hitch our hope to the masses taking to the streets to reassure their politicians and warn they will be punished in future elections if they support Israeli aggression against Palestinians in Gaza.
Stage five: Despair and submission
Unfortunately, hope can often be fleeting, and many Gazans have experienced recurring cycles of despair. The repeated loss of life, homes and security lead to deep feelings of helplessness.
In the final stage, there is a sense of submission as Gazans accept the reality that they are unable to change the situation. That they are left alone. That the world has abandoned us. That Israel can kill and destroy at large with impunity. This is a stage marked by endurance, as Palestinians strive to adapt and persevere in the face of ongoing challenges.
These stages of war have become an unfortunate part of life in Gaza, shaping the resilience and perseverance of the Palestinian people in the face of unimaginable hardships imposed by the Israeli occupation.
27 October 2023: What it’s like when Israel bombs your building
I have six children. And so far we have survived seven major Israeli escalations, unscathed. We are an average family. My wife, Nusayba, is a housewife, I have two children in college and my youngest child, Amal, is 7. In Gaza, Amal is already four wars old.
We are an average family in Gaza, but we have had our fair share of Israeli death and destruction.
So far, since the early 1970s, I have lost 20 (and 15 last week) members of my extended family due to Israeli aggression.
In 2014, Israel destroyed our family home of seven flats, killing my brother Mohammed.
In 2014, Israel killed about 20 of my wife’s family including her brother, her sister, three of her sister’s kids, her grandfather and her cousin. And destroyed several of my in-laws’ homes.
Combined, my wife and I have lost over fifty 50 members to Israeli war and terror.
2023 war on Gaza
As the bombs fall and Israel targets sleeping families in their homes, parents are torn between several issues.
Should we leave? But go where, when Israel targets evacuees on their way and targets the areas they evacuate to?
Should we stay with relatives? Or should our relatives stay with us, whose home is relatively “safe?” We can never be sure. It’s been more than 75 years of brutal occupation – and over six major Israeli military onslaughts in the past 15 years – and we have so far failed to understand Israel’s brutality and mentality of death and destruction.
And then there is the fear of what to do if – when – we are bombed. We try to evade them. But how can you evade the bombs when Israel throws three or four or five consecutive bombs at the same home.
The big question Palestinian households debate is whether we should sleep in the same room so that when we die, we die together, or whether we should sleep in different rooms so some of us may survive.
The answer is always that we need to sleep in the living room together. If we die, we die together. No one has to deal with the heartbreak.
No food. No water. No electricity.
This 2023 war is different. Israel has intensified using hunger as a weapon. By completely besieging Gaza and cutting off the electricity and water supplies and not allowing aid or imports, Israel is not only putting Palestinians on a diet, but also starving them.
In my household, and we are a well-off family, my wife and I sat with the children and explained the situation to them, especially the little ones: “We need to ration. We need to eat and drink a quarter of what we usually consume. It’s not that we do not have money, but food is running out and we barely have water.”
And good luck explaining to your 7-year-old that she can’t have her two morning eggs and instead she will be having a quarter of a bomb! (Israel later bombed the eggs.)
As a parent, I feel desperate and helpless. I can’t provide the love and protection I am supposed to give my kids.
Instead of often telling my kids “I love you,” I have been repeating for the past two weeks:
“Kids, eat less. Kids, drink less.” And I imagine this being my last thing I say to them and it is devastating.
Israel bombs our building
If we had a little food last week, now we barely have any because Israel struck our home with two missiles while we were inside. And without prior warning!
My wife Nusayba had already instructed the kids to run if a bombing happened nearby. We never expected [our building] to be hit. And that was a golden piece of advice.
I was hosting four families of relatives in my flat. Most of them were kids and women.
We ran and ran. We carried the little ones and grabbed the small bags with our cash and important documents that Gazans keep at the door every time Israel wages a war.
We escaped with a miracle, with only bruises and tiny scratches. We checked and found everyone was fine. And then we walked to a nearby UN school shelter, which was in an inhuman condition. We crammed into small classrooms with other families.
With that, we lost our last sense of safety. We lost our water. We lost our food and the remaining eggs that Amal loves.
We are an average Palestinian family. But we have had our fair share of Israeli death and destruction. In Gaza, no one is safe. And no place is safe. Israel could kill all 2.3 million of us and the world would not bat an eye.
730 notes
·
View notes
Text
Lawyer Joe
Joe the lawyer died suddenly, at the age of 45. He got to the gates of Heaven, and the angel standing there said, "We've been waiting a long time for you." "What do you mean," he replied, "I'm only 45, in the prime of my life. Why did I have to die now?" "45? You're not 45, you're 82," replied the angel. "Wait a minute. If you think I'm 82 then you have the wrong guy. I'm only 45. I can show you my birth certificate." "Hold on. Let me go check," said the angel and disappeared inside. After a few minutes the angel returned. "Sorry, but by our records you are 82. I checked all the hours you have billed your clients, and you have to be 82..."
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
the problem with time jumps are they leave room for so many inconsistencies if done incorrectly. like why is luther a stripper? how did he figure out that sloane didn't make it, since he was hellbent on finding her? why didn't sloane make it but sparrow ben did? what about the ben in seoul? do they have birth certificates? social security cards? how did they find out that lila's parents were alive in this timeline? when they immigrate to america with the whole family? when did they find out? you're telling me that diego couldn't find another job? why? why didn't lila find a job if her parents were clearly taking care of the kids? how much was diego making if they were living in the suburbs? are lila's family working? also why would the writers says lila doesn't like bracelets? what happened to one diego gave her back in s3? why did they have a whole arc showing us diego could be a good dad and do nothing with it? why didn't allison pursue another career? where did ray go? did he really abandon claire too? if he's the father in this timeline. what about klaus! i actually don't have much questions because they kept his story relatively simple. ben was into crypto? why? viktor also got off easier than his siblings... tbh i don't know what to do with five being in the cia so im walking away from that.
#tua spoilers#tua4#tua#let me just bitch about this all day and i'll shut up in a few hours...#tua negativity#the umbrella academy
520 notes
·
View notes