#shitty mini reviews

[jelly-o630]

Growing up isn’t learning how to take care of yourself, moving out to live on your own, or even starting your career it’s no longer subscribing to YouTube channels with a huge backlog of videos but instead following people who have all of 5 videos that are each an hour long for who you will patiently wait their next entry

[loonarii]

ITZY BACK TO BEING HIT MAKERS I KNEW THEY COULD DO IT YEESSSSSSSSSSS

[headlessdino]

batfam hcs

really mundane headcanons about the batfam if they were a Normal, non-vigilante family with some sibling stuff

dick:

always calls shotgun before anyone else (jason) can and they all (jason) get really dramatic over it, esp when they're younger

liked to play mermaids as a kid

had a really bad rebellious phase and would go to parties every week and bruce could Not keep him in check

decorates his room with band posters and other stuff like that. a lot of photographs too.

weirdly competitive about board games

insanely bisexual

late night snacker

used to sleep walk

whistles while doing random tasks like they do in shows

jason:

really likes orange juice

has tattoos

probably got a good couple of shitty stick n pokes as a teenager that bruce only found out about years later

had a photography phase

decorates his room but not as hardcore about it as dick

reads a lot

hates going to bed hungry

really good at math

latino (chilean maybe)

tim:

"would you look at that! someone came out of his cave" (first time seeing his family in the past three days)

doesn't know how to swim (his parents forgot that was a Thing he had to lean at some point) and just tries his best when he's in the water because he doesn't want to admit he doesn't know how

stoner

is insane about chess

really messy room but he still knows exactly where everything is

picks up hobbies for like 2 weeks and then drops them

has a blog with movie reviews

his socks never match

conspiracy theorist

damian:

when he was younger and short he couldn't reach a lot of the kitchen cupboards so bruce bought a stepstool. he would only ever use it when he was by himself or with dick because of his pride

hates mint toothpaste

weirdly good speller

oil paints and makes sculpture

likes puzzles

goes on a lot of walks

plays tennis for his school team

bruce:

naturally wakes up really early

has mini drawer things on his desk

always wears long socks

has a pair of lucky socks

plays tennis with damian

old useless key collection

had a genuine emo phase as a kid and denies it whenever alfred tries to bring it up

got forced to work at a mcdonalds by alfred so the money wouldn't get to his head too much

extra:

all the kids have their names on their doors with the wooden letters

[whywhisperinginvain]

Unlovable?

Hello! Peepaw here trying to cook some content!!

So, I decided to do a little comic previewing a sad part of my fanfic, Illusion of Choice! Chapter 4, to be more specific. I plan to make a comic after I finish more important lore-wise chapters, but if I track some positive reviews I crave comments, I might do more preview mini-comics! Though it's gonna take a long, long, LONG time!

I hope you like the babybones angst! Poor little thing. Too bad nobody can comfort him.

Unless Peepaw gets teleported in the timeline. If so, Peepaw might steal some kneecaps from shitty parents. No one is spared from this old man's wrath ♥

[writingoneout]

Untilted Katamari Reflections

Preamble:

Content considerations for the following include:

Parental abuse

Bigotry

Worldly anxiety

You're welcome back another day if that's too much right now.

I.

It’s fall of 2015.

You and your virgin college friends drink shitty cocktails called the “Slutty Will Rodgers.” They’re just Pepsi rawdogged with indeterminate amounts of grenadine and Captain Morgan. When you bought the mixers a Wal-Mart stocker yodeled “OOOOoOoooOH, maKIN sOMe DRINKS?!?!” and you knew it was time to leave.

We Love Katamari is on the Telly. It’s a sweet, trippy game you first bought to cope with high school. On Dark Fridays at 1am, when your inbox was barren and your balls were full, you’d drive to the empty gym downtown and sprint six miles. Then you’d come home and replay the firefly level until you fell asleep with your pug.

Your college friends are bad at the game, so they pass the controller. You’re playing the underwater stage. A spaceman falls in the pond of people gunk and stacked crabs. It’s going really well if you’re honest. You point to the screen and say “this’ll be Florida if Trump wins.” See Fig. 1.

Figure 1: Rick Desantis has big plans for Disney.

Your friends don’t reply because they soon won’t be virgins and their tongues battle each other’s. It’s a different game they play, one with fuzzier rules, but greater industry respect. You wish the campus gym was open 24/7.

. . .

Your skills as the prince are not inherent. You first meet him in 2005, when your dyspraxic hands can barely tie a shoe. Your parents catch you lose shit for the Toonami review of Me and My Katamari. They buy it for Christmas, hoping to steady your nerves while your father’s in therapy.

Dr. Flam is a Neo-Freudian hitched to your mom’s guy, Dr. Flim. She’s deep in your dad’s dream journal and makes him watch movies like Cool Hand Luke to really reign in his ego. He gets the DVDs from the Netflix site, then through the mail. As a family you watch your dad’s therapy films and reruns of Inyuasha.

In the waiting room you barely navigate the sticky ball through Namco Bandai’s Satoshi Kon parade. See Fig. 2. You’ve only seen adults express anger verbally, so when you mess up you grunt a lot and let out those Leopold Butters Stotch swears like “crap,” “shoot,” and “gosh darn.” You’re not particularly self-aware, so you probably just say “god fucking damn it” a few times and don’t remember. Years later you realize there was probably a secretary behind the glass watching you do all this.

Figure 2: Bwahbwahwabhbawahbwaaaaah.

Sometimes there’s a girl in the room with you, just around your age. She’s stuck while Dr. Flim teaches her mom about what dream snakes mean for her fear of male puberty. That's what he did for your mom, anyway.

You think the waiting-room stranger is cute, but you won’t admit you like girls yet, especially not to yourself. To cope with the cognitive dissonance, you do your weird shit louder while refusing to make eye contact with her. If you get real stressed you crank up the main menu track and yell “ahhhhh that’s so relaxing” while the “nah nah nah nahs” play through your headphones.

At one point the girl stands against a wall and stares at you with her arms crossed. You bet she thinks you’re cool, but she’s probably just annoyed and hopes you’ll notice, or maybe just ask if she’s OK. It’s probably good you don’t talk with her. You might ask something stupid, like if she's seen the roach corpse in the stairwell. It’s been there for a year straight, isn’t that crazy?

For better and worse, you power through your little game alone. Every time you lose the King of All Cosmos beats, shoots, and belittles you. See Fig. 3. It reminds you of when your own dad shattered your Harry Potter wand over the kitchen counter because you dropped a mini pizza.

Figure 3: The King of All Cosmos offers little constructive advice, all things considered.

You fail quite frequently. Eventually you drop the game because it’s getting stressful and you have the power to relieve yourself of the situation—not the Freudian lobby, just your fake dad.

II.

It’s 2012. PlayStation Network uploads The Prince’s primeval outing: Katamari Damacy. Within, Padre Cosmotic flaps his gums over too much hooch then slams his dump truck ass through the better part of our solar system. He dislodges every recognized constellation and even the moon itself.

Cosmos sends Prince to Earth—the last brick left in the shitstorm—to make slop of our planet and bodies. With the slop space itself will be made anew. The Good Son does as he's told, and every living entity experiences euphoric ego death within the bulbous heaven of the Katamari.

As a Real Gamer Teen you lose a lot less in this one. You really go in and fix Fake Dad’s mistakes, no problem at all. This is why a year ago you hailed “gaming journalism” as your calling. You write clean and play tight; should keep the lights on. It’s the most concrete idea you’ve had since 7th grade when you outlined a YA novel called Tooth Pocket. Even you didn’t think Scholastic would buy that one, though. It was just too hot for the book fair.

One day you’re cranking through FFVI and your real dad swings by, mad you're young. He grills your ass and says “I bet you can’t even tell me the biggest thing happening right now.” It’s some real “What’s a gallon of milk cost?” shit, he could mean anything.

 Surprisingly, you can’t think of a good answer. You and your friends are actually pretty informed because John Stewart is still at the desk and y’all chime in every day. See Fig. 4. You also spend hours each week tearing through MSN slideshows in your Graphic Design class because the Photoshop takes five minutes. You’ve seen a staggering amount of the Syrian civil war.

Figure 4: Sometimes in Snapchat you draw glasses on your cat to make him look like Mitch McConnel. You wouldn't do that without this guy.

Still, you’re a little stumped. It’s the middle of a phenomenon native to moralist presidencies known as "a slow news week.” You actually ran out of war shit the other day and clicked through some slides about Pakistani wrestlers. The seniors who offered you Jack Daniels in the Whataburger lot saw it and laughed. They thought you were peeping dong in class. You really weren’t, but they didn’t believe you. They graduate certain you were bricked up in the Dell Lab over big guys in spandex.

“I don’t know,” you tell your dad.

He throws his hands behind his head, hard, like an orangutan chucking logs at a poacher.

“It’s the fucking carbon tax,” he yells. This comes as a surprise, you think, because that shit is last month’s news. It really didn’t go anywhere.

“Do you not pay attention because you don’t give a shit, or are you just a nihilist and think you can’t do anything?” You can tell in his eyes he thinks there’s a real answer. “Seriously, which is it?

You don’t remember what you said. You probably just stammered until he walked off.

A month later he picks you up from marching band. Your phone is dead, so he had to wait twenty minutes longer than anticipated while you found his car. He punches the rearview mirror until the windshield cracks then screams of how your birth kept him from New England.

III.

It’s 2016. A rockin’ MILF in the Psych department gets you really into Hamilton. See Fig. 5. Every day you wake up on the grind and blast “You Aaron Burr, sir?” through your shitty 7-11 cans. While cramming foreign language Quizlets and McGraw Hill Online you do this thing called “Hafilton.” It’s where rock up to “Nonstop” and quit listening just before Hamilton decides what he will stop is being a good husband.

Figure 5: Like Kojima, you know "MILF" is a mindset, not a factual inquiry.

It’s 2018. Your grades are notably better and you’ve snuck into the honors program. Like Hamilton himself, you really flourished at 19 and thought about running for office. You immediately abandoned this idea after remembering your allergy to recordings of your image or voice.

You cohabit with the Psych MILF, and she offers some advice: she’s really had her boots on the ground with this whole “clinical psych thing” and honestly, respectfully, she loves you, but dear God it might not be your scene. It’s taken a real toll on her and the friends, and she can’t imagine you going through that shit.

At 1am in your living room you boot up DOOM (2016) and listen through some Hamilton. Angelica is thirsty on main when you remember that you, yourself, could be a lawyer. You don’t have to run for Congress to fight the establishment. There’s just the common law, and it’s right there. You can just get your grubby little hands in that shit and work your magic.

. . .

It’s the last semester of undergrad. Your Western Thought professor says Hamilton wasn’t really a huge deal and really James Madison shat out the big parts of our faction-proof empire. Yes, there was, in fact, a civil war, but the caplock rifle worked it out. After the Federalist papers he has you read the Bill of Rights but no Supreme Court cases. There’s a lot of talk on negative liberties.

Just before finals, the learned doctor says your generation only has two things to worry about: the climate and the poverty. Yeah they’re big, he says, but they’re just two things. You’re crafty kids, smart as the framers, even.

. . .

The state decides law school is your jam and lets you come inside.

There’s the negative liberties but you actually read Supreme Court opinions when the big boys aren’t shaking fists for Valley Forge. They have you listen to Hamilton for context. You feel dirty. An LRW professor puts on the “I’m Just a Bill” video and your sectionmate with Ivy degrees gets really, really mad.

. . .

The Federalist Society has a comfy presence at your law school. Along with Big Oil they sling out free pizza to every Little Scalia with a rumbly tum tum.

On your way to class you hear what the pizza boys feel. They hate Europeans, those social democrats with the rotten armories and clumpy cash. The Euros, they think, give too much wiggle room for the mentally ill, and by that they mean they mean gay people and probably just women overall.

There are more than two things to fix, you think.

. . .

The pandemic hits. You and some pals start a Google Doc to stay afloat. It barely works. In the Zoom review for the property final your professor catches multiple people crying. "You don't have to be here," he tells them, “there are other jobs.”

. . .

A year passes. You’re in a niche public interest class you do all right with. The professor looks you and thirty-five others dead in the eye and says how sorry he is that law school is traumatic. You shed a single tear in your little window. You're pretty in the shit and haven’t worn pants to class in months.

Then public interest prof takes a big, big drag from his long, fat spliff. He spins his desk chair and baseball cap at the same time, never letting go of the joint.

“Hey,” he says. “It’s not your fault, really, but the world is fucked. It’s time to fix what your parents did.”

The next week he gives a practice exam where the best solution is to sell an old lady’s house to Nestlé.

IV.

It’s 2022. After throwing your whole gooch at it, you fail the bar exam.

You fall back hard into exercise. When you’re not slamming Barbri you’re at the gym binging curls and cranking the Chainsaw Man soundtrack. One night on the way to squats you finally hear “Black Parade.” Just like you, Mr. Gerry Wayland is stuck between global disrepair and the desire to write Funny Little Books.

You just started an FLB yourself, actually. It’s spin on a Story Break episode you love. In your version there’s a fucked up civil war horse that moves like a spider and is covered in bugs. Rich people kill the planet then the horse gets lost in space. It’s compelling, you promise. There’s body horror and pirates dressed like Gorton’s Fisherman. See Fig. 6 It’s about the horrors of the contemporary world state. It’ll be fun.

Figure 6: An untapped horror icon. Imagine blood contrasting that yellow.

Big problem, though: you remember rich people love hiking. There’s no grass on Mars, not that good shit anyway. Would they really fuck all of it?

You edit. In the last few years, the real breathless ones, the oligarchs cash their tab. A cartel, they think, could really muscle those stragglers, the tragically common. There’s one city left with both breathable air and refugees. They level it. The few survivors are spread amongst the stars, so their loves and languages may die.

. . .

It’s the middle of Bar Prep Round 2. You and the patient MILF see Hadestown in the Big City.

There’s a juke joint on stage flanked by devil trombones. A sad little guy slinks in from the janitor’s closet. His name is Orpheus and, just like you, he’s a sad, short writer who likes a lady so much it comes out weird. He has a vision, he says, for a little ditty. It’s compelling, he promises, and shit’s gonna change. His love is functional and realized, worth the investment of a hardened woman displaced by capital’s torture. She believes him.

You cry because you know where this goes.

It’s just a single tear.

Don’t worry.

Nobody sees.

. . .

There’s this game you like, by some corporate anarchists who hate themselves. They’re Scandinavian, from the spot in Tallin where you stopped for a cruise. Every gift shop there had swastikas and gas masks leftover from the bloody years.

In the game is a liberal yacht MILF. She thinks you’re stupid but someone’s helping with your gun, so you’ve got that on her. And yet, she pins you, re your whole writing thing. See Fig. 7.

Figure 7: She sucked, but it still hurt when she left.

Your favorite Supreme Court podcast says the ocean’s last hope is other countries. But those countries’ people cry to the Disco game, and their ministers also bought The End of History. You meet them on the subreddit. You're all geeked out, waiting for the tide.

. . .

It’s the era of desert cradles. God thinks you’re disgusting, so he sends his better kids with a memo: the flood was too much work on his end, it’s time for something different.

“Just keep walking,” he says.

Your skin bares his figure. So do the corpses. You little birds among billions, gassed out and screaming, move to clean.

V.

It’s 2023.

We Love Katamari is up on the PlayStation store. You sit with the cats and mow down some crabs. You don’t need it so much these days, but it’s nice.

There’s a Bar card in your wallet, just below your gym tag. There are two interviews in your Google Calendar. Good stuff might happen, hopefully soon. You crawl into bed and wrap an arm around your wife’s rib cage.

Everything matters and nothing is safe.

You are loved enough to sleep.

[scary-pixie]

November 1st = New Tina Year! (secret diary entry and upcoming goals)

I'm mainly writing this down so I don't slack off! Cause if I slack off I can look back on this and think, "wow, you failed terribly. dingus."

Ahem.

Anyways, I am in the process of thinking up some new short term goals now that:

2024 con season is over (with the exception of some smaller events)

Spooky Season is almost over (I like posting non-stop spooky stuff during this delightful time)

Twitter is going inside the toilet

Magazine troubles (more on this below)

I have met the famous man whose inspiration played a big role in both: a) getting back into drawing my old OCs after 15+ years (little round glasses are a bad influence), and b) getting brave enough to be on video after saying I would never do this for god knows how long. (secret: I watched a certain music video with one of his characters the morning before I made my own). BUT HE WILL NEVER KNOW ABOUT THIS AND I WILL NEVER TELL! I AM FULL OF CRINGE!!!

This is what I'm thinking at the moment, in terms of my next creative direction. I appreciate any thoughts or advice!!:

My OC art was an absolute flop in terms of gaining new social media followers. Bluesky seems to be a LITTLE bit better, but it's still early to tell and I haven't posted too many of my OCs there yet either. For the time being, though, I plan to get back to my Schoolism subscription assignments since I've been neglecting them for a bit!

good lord I need to flatten my stomach somehow, as I cannot fit into my preferred fashion choices. I quit watching TV for a while in the summer, which helped a bit (I tend to eat everything in the house while I watch), so I may try this again soon.

arm workouts are going alright I guess, I am gaining a bit of muscle in my armes so they do not look so much like noodles.

Tempted to get back into posting video game screenshots and mini-reviews on social media since people really liked this stuff, but I'm worried it might just add more to my plate.

I'm really enjoying doing videos now, I'm just not sure which direction to take them (or if I even should take them places). I tend to film a lot of myself and a long-time friend in the car just saying stupid shit, but I don't really want to post all of these.

I wish to read more books without falling asleep, jesus christ this is tough.

On a similar note: the magazine I used to write book and comic reviews for has SHUT DOWN GOD DAMN IT so maybe I'll write some new stuff here?? Not sure yet!

I need to get back to my Japanese studies!! I used to do them at lunch and dinner but now I get distracted by all the awful political shit online! Aaaaaaaa!! I really hope America doesn't combust in the next few days but I guess we'll find out soon...

Finally, I need to be more active HERE! It's the best place for longform writing and art that might be a bit too "cringe" for the general public. Let's see if I can stick to it!!

I think that's all I have to SAY for NOW. Wish me luck in sticking to my goals instead of spiralling into ADHD Twitter nonsense, aaaaaaaaaaaa!!

Tagging a couple frands: @prometheus-ghost @fadingdreamerdream @thewebspinner @autolykiss @draganwhorror

Also anyone who actually wants to watch my shitty ass videos, the link is below. I have a bunch more but haven't posted them! https://www.instagram.com/kittensoft39/reels/

[tfmerc]

Kyle Garrick Headcanon's

notes: just a reminder that these are just my silly little thoughts!

-—-

masterlist - rules - character headcanon's

-—-

- Was obsessed with Yu-Gi-Oh as a kid : Originally started collecting them after his uncle coughed up his duplicates. Puffed out his chest and waltzed around school showing them off, bragging about how much cooler his Cyber Dragon Hova is compared to Pikachu. His Ma still has shoeboxes filled with the cards stowed away in her garage, waiting for Gaz to teach his nephew/niece how to play.

- Trinket collector : I just imagine Gaz a little bit like a crow? Always hanging around in the background, studying his surroundings; taking in all the small details. Picking flattened bottle tops up off the ground at shitty pubs, running his fingers over the ridges. Little keychains, Lego figures, random keys, mini hot wheels... all ending up in the top draw of his bedside table.

- Hates minions : It's not that he hates them, more makes him uncomfortable. Watched it with his niece/nephew and payed little attention to it, though re watched it with Soap and couldn't help but start googling what minions actually were.

- His underwear is labeled everyday of the week : Knows that he can space out after rather confronting missions, spacing out during training or briefings; hyper aware of how quickly things can change. But you know what doesn't change? The days of the week, always Monday through to Sunday.

- Practically all his screentime is on letterboxd : A bit of a movie fanatic, leaning towards shitty/old slasher films. Always writes the most in-depth, almost poetic reviews under movies that have .5 stars that no one else knows exist. Stalks other people's letterboxd and will leave judgemental comments on their reviews.

[vivalgi]

Almost forgot this month's Choices Insiders due to my lack of interest in the app that's taken me over again lately.

If anyone's wondering then here's what I wrote in the monthly questionnaire:

---

Of course we're getting new skill set and weapons because the ones we already have aren't underutilized enough:

The lead writer Emi also has a twitter thread about the series.

Let's be honest, the real reason why we're getting new skills is because PB really wants us to spend them diamonds on new bling. Fine, money has to come from somewhere, though I'm not really thrilled about it. I even pointed it out in my book 2 review:

--- "Our artists have also been hard at work..." Oh, screw you, PB! It's just some quick sketches for the ignorant masses. The real stuff was definitely baked in the AI oven. I've already seen - the new CGs, outfits and characters were all done with the help of image generators. Also, not a fan of that mini hitler blocking Nia's spotlight.

---

Did PB even let us send questions this time? I usually check Instagram daily and was looking forward to send another set of questions PB will never answer but I swear I didn't see one in the story feed. Regarding the replies, I don't get why PB doesn't want to spread out its release schedule on other week days. Each book would more attention that way.

---

The only one here I'm really looking forward to is Blades 3. I'm dreading what PB has planned for the wedding stuff in COP3 as PB has a really shitty track record with GOC characters. I just want to solve the father's murder and I'm already imagining a head canon about divorcing from Trystan 2 months after the wedding and starting dating Ruby instead.

Even though Bitten is a supernatural story with two LIs, it's still gender locked for some weird reason, so it's a no from me. I simply can't play with those ugly ass new female MCs and they're too much boring work to fix. The other two new titles Inheritance and Years Apart sound like boring Hallmark fillers🥱

---

Funny thing is that in the FAQ PB already said Blades 3 wide release would be in November so why put the ambiguous "fall" here:

---

It's sad to see Choices in such a miserable state and its new sugar daddy's murky background doesn't instill confidence either and it's all affecting my motivation to deal with the game at this point. I'm more excited about Candlelight's project but that one takes time make.

[eyewithinthesky]

Shitty headcanons

Obey Me

- Asmodeus doesn't use deodorant. He has so many rose scented bubble baths that the sent sticks and he just uses perfume for the rest.

-Levi has absolutely gone on the devildom black market to get video games from the human world.

-Barbatos has a room in the castle that is dedicated to astrology and future visions. (It's like a void)

- Satan has read A03 before (or the Devildom equivalent.) He's seen your posts.

-Lucifer reads your private messages too. He said you weren't the only one with that ability.

-addition, he reads the Anti Lucifer club chat the most to learn and avoid their pranks before it happens

-Diavolo has joined up with the hate luci club to prank him. He found it very funny.

-Belphie has one of those mini tents that you stuff with pillows and sleep with.

-Beel and Belphie have a solar projector

-Levi has a water projector

-Mammon has stolen RAD's credit card before and gone shipping with it.

The Magnus Archives

- Nikola reads all reviews on skincare products.

Additionally, she won't buy from brands if they've been animal tested.

- Helen wanted to own a hotel before becoming fused with the Distortion.

-Jon had listened to 'Everywhere at the end of time'

-Micheal has tried finger knitting. It didn't work (half joke one)

-Martin has seen videos online of people with pet mini highland cows and demands Jon get one.

-Elias has put cheap shitty wine in an exotic bottle to convince to his rich friends it's good (he drinks all the good wine)

-Tim has played Two trucks in the office before

- Sasha knows the violin. She learnt as a child.

[waterparksdrama]

Thanks for replying to my would you recommend them because I had heard so much mixed reviews, I didn’t really know what to think about it

What shitty jokes has Awsten made or who’s he hung out with? I’m not that familiar with him

The only person I really know of is Joel Madden I think but I don’t really know HOW shifty he is, I’ve just heard things

awsten used to make a bunch of edgy jokes pre 2016 for like. literally anything under the sun. like this is a man who admitted his white ass got like five durags of his confiscated in high school so just imagine the rest of the edgy shit he was saying and you'll probably be on the right path.

joel madden fucking sucks. maybe his twin sucks too but joel dated hilary duff when she was 16 and he was 25 and it was very public (right before she turned 18 of course). they're on better terms now i guess (i mean the maddens are definitely a part of the reason the band of hilary duff's husband opened for parx last minute on their most recent tour) but it's still. weird.

not to mention the maddens are such trendsters that fucking joel has collabed with blood on the dance floor when it was definitely known that dahvie was an actual pedo.

and one final nail in the coffin; their glassdoor reviews of their management company. angry detailed reviews of how disorganized and misogynistic the work setting they foster is with descriptions of it along the lines of "men's locker room of the industry", "vanity project", and "young women steer clear". the maddens are parx's mentors and they are the first to be under their management company.

i really don't want awsten to become a mini madden but the maddens do have their own successful business ventures through veeps and clearly they're encouraging awsten to do similar things with his hiidef fashion line. idk i just kinda worry sometimes awsten's gonna ride off the coattails of his former glory like the maddens do with having podcasts with tiktok artists they sometimes manage and only make shitty music every four years. - iz

[copyspaghetti]

Tenegaru (twit), honeypotluck (ao3), an anonymous secret 3rd person and I talked about a Mob Psycho X Undertale AU and I made art for it

[ID: Pixel art of Reigen Arataka reimagined as an anthropomorphic foxlike monster in an undertale AU. He sits in a mostly barren office, with a table, a laptop, a printer, a potted plant in the corner, and a window with the blinds half drawn. The ambient light is red-ish. He is backlit by the yellow window. Reigen has one arm behind his head, is reclining in his chair, and has the other paw lifted up with the pointer finger and claw stretched out. The left text box reads "* Welcome to Spirits & Such * I'm Reigen Arataka * Greatest PSYCHIC of the 21st CENTURY" and the right text box reads "Buy", "Sell", "Talk", "Exit", "3G", "2/8". The talk-option is selected by the red heart. /End ID]

AU notes under the cut

Anon: Okay I haven’t left yet. But I would love to see an UT/DT style Spirits&Such shop for him.

Lucky: tbh him being some kind of trickster that follows frisk!Mob around in a UT au. literally everybody knows reigen is full of shit, but Mob is so trusting lmao. somehow all of the shitty things Reigen sells Mob along the way actually end up being useful in wacky ways.

Tenegaru: weird buffs, good heals.

Anon: That would be neat! I can see him as maybe a foxlike monster or even a Boss Monster w shit stats lmao. God what would his voice clip sound like??? 🤔

Tenegaru: aa aaa aaa aa a a a a a ae e e e e ee ee æ ee.

Anon: Just any clip of Sakurai screaming and just take a sample and repeat it.

Me: Shit stats yesss but he has his special moves and they're the stupidest ever but he keeps winning.

Anon: *This is one of Reigen’s signature moves.

Tenegaru: salt splash rains salt.

Me: A single flake of salt rains through the screen. He's like oops running out, anyway.

Lucky: "ask this magic 8 ball special questions and it will always show you the right path to take! and that'll be a gazillion gold, kid" *mob literally is never lost and thinks it's because the 8 ball has all the the right answers after all, but it's just that he's extraordinarily lucky*

Me: XD excellent choice, Mob.... The blue flowers all say stuff about how Reigen is a fraudster like negative reviews.

Lucky: "it's not nice to lie" - mob, defending reigen's honor. he refuses to listen to anybody about the fox lmao. 😭 imagine it actually makes reigen feel bad.

Me: I think Ekubo would be a monster he meets like the Mad Dummy.

Anon: He’s a ghost that takes the form of a ratted dummy and he’s just walking around, leaving fluff around everywhere lol.

Tenegaru: i dunno maybe he’d be like lancer and start out as an enemy but join the team like he does in canon lol.

Anon: Mixing both UT and DR together forgive me. [Referring to the party of Kris, Ralsei and Susie vs. Solo Frisk (with inner Chara)]

Lucky: eku joining the party and kind of quietly keeping mob out of trouble is sweet.

Anon: How would timelines be into play? That’s another question 🤔 Ekubo would show up from time to time on the title screen. He says you’re doing good in leading Mob in the right direction when you’re a Pacifist. But if you so wanted, you could reset everything….. or switch your current route up and start killing. Who knows.

Me: My vision: Mob runs into a weird dummy in the junkyard that is being worshipped by small random monsters and the dummy comes to life and it's Ekubo and then he follows Mob around. One of Ekubo's moves is making a little minion attack you.

Anon: Ohh please! That’s adorable. They try to make you laugh too.

Me: Do they tell horrible punny jokes in style with the original UT?

Anon: Oh god yes! We need that ROFL random humor in there too.

Me: Mezato, what would she be?

Anon: Honestly, I haven’t thought about it yet. I was mainly thinking about the main party like in DT and how they’d function. But I do know Mob would be the only human fs.

Me: I think maybe Mezato is a mini fox, same kind as Reigen, but Reigen insists that he's the only real fox around so clearly Mezato is something else XD you know how there are lots of dogs like lesser dog ? This time there's a lot of foxes.

Anon: Maybe a fennec fox?

[itookyoudown]

for the ask game: top 5 justified episodes?

oh lordy this is so hard to choose. i'm not answering this with any thoughtfulness just going with gut instinct.

5: Full Commitment, season 2. this is my guilty pleasure and comfort episode because of how western it feels and how much tim gutterson we get :)

we even get raylan talking to dan!! i just love how all the pieces of the plot and characters come together in this episode. this also sets up and kicks off the finale of Bloody Harlan. really the last three episodes of this season feel like a mini movie to me, they all flow together brilliantly.

4: The Promise, season 6. this isn't my favorite season or even my favorite season finale, but it's one of my favorite episodes because of how bittersweet it is. it was the perfect wrap-up for a perfect show and the final scene is my favorite final scene in any show i've ever watched.

some characters survive, but nobody really wins and i love that. it feels like such a real true to life ending.

3: The Hunt, season 6. the episode that cinched boyd's characterization and showed us two flavors of domesticity horror (raylan and winona with willa's heart murmur reveal and trying to navigate co-parenting along with raylan's lackluster fathering VS boyd's abduction, terrorization, and assault of ava).

this is the most thriller-esque episode of justified to me and truly does verge into lowkey horror at some points. it shocked and numbed me the first time i watched it and the reality didn't really click until the second rewatch and by the third time it truly sunk in.

the fact boyd became the type of man his father and his brother were...utterly devastating and really changed my perspective on his character. and he chose it, he plotted it and organized it in a cold fashion. it's heartbreaking and at first you can't believe it but upon rewatches of the show it revealed to me that yeah...yeah. boyd was always capable of this and it's no surprise this is where he and ava ended up.

outlaw king and queen they never were and never would have been.

this episode is also fascinating because you can see critic response to it as a disturbing time capsule. look at reviews of this episode back when the show was airing...be prepared to be sickened by how often boyd assaulting ava is framed as "making love" or a reunification/rekindling of their relationship 🙃

this episode is always difficult for me to rewatch, but i still love it.

on a lighter note, i also delight in raylan being a fail dad and with city primeval fresh in my mind i love how it really does confirm his work over family priority from the get-go lol.

2: Outlaw, season 4. in general this is a solid af episode of justified in the best season of the show, but it ranks so high in my mind because it's the culmination of Arlo and Rayan's relationship. look, the truth is abuse is so rarely accurately portrayed in media. usually, it's revenge fantasy or feel-good simplification that reduces things down to evil monsters and pure perfect victims. and i get why that happens, i get it, most people find it healing and those stories do need to exist i'm not knocking them.

but justified has a complex and multilayered way of dealing with abusive relationships (they did it with boyd and ava too) that actually digs into how complicated and messy and painful they truly are.

the fact we get to see Raylan grieve Arlo in such an understated but devasting way...holy shit. one of the best moments in the show imo. because it doesn't matter if you hate your parent and they were shitty and abusive. you still loved them. you still love who they were in-between the abuse and maybe you don't grieve the person they were but you grieve what could have been and what you never had with them.

1: Decoy, season 4: all-time best episode of justified and top-tier episode of television everywhere. the episode is really the pinnacle of justified's genre (neo western). e v e r y t h i n g about this episode honors justified's storylines and honors characterization. heart and soul and brain all in one go.

it respects the lawmen and the outlaws in portrayal. the writing is tight, the dialogue is outstanding, and it comes with one of justified's most iconic and thematic shots (the stairwell scene).

[plznomonkeys]

Wtf is up with reviewing on fanfiction these past years?

Mini-rant incoming

Y'all, idk what happened to these sites, but over the last couple years there has been huge changes on FF.net and AO3.

When I first started out in like, ~2011 ish, I was 16, young, dumb, wrote pretty cringe fanfics. MF's, I got a review on the first chapter of fics within 24 hours that I posted. They were honestly dogshit and I didn't have ANY concept of characterization. They just... did what I wanted them to.

One of my fanfics got over 400 reviews IN 3 MONTHS.

THATS OBSCENE

But now? I'm lucky to get a single review with a thumbs up emoji. And I get it, some people have nothing to say, but even little, "hey this is great, I like this, don't like this bit, but I'm still reading" is totally fine! I even rather have people give a review when they stop reading and tell me why. Because how the frickity frackity am I ever going to improve as a writer if nobody stops me?????

And I get it, maybe my writing just isn't good enough. That's entirely possible.

HOWEVER

If that was the case, why is my view count on FF over 500 reads per chapter? How about my AO3 being at over 5000 hits? If they were so shitty, why are people reading them?

And then I see these fucking posts online about people saying "oh yes, this fanfic was amazing, it means a lot to me, I love this author, they're amazing" but have they ever told the author that? No? Then they're shocked when the story gets abandoned.

I'm sorry, but reviews and commentary seriously matter for us authors. Seriously, they do. When I post a chapter that finally lore drops some seriously important notes to a story and nobody gives feedback, I start questioning myself. Did I do it right? Was it poorly written? Am I just fucking with myself and an idiot? I don't know, can't tell.

Tell your authors that their book is good. Once is not enough. Seriously, even just every few chapters tell them!

I've written two fics that are approximately 200,000 words deep, but they have very few reviews. And do you know what that looks like to a viewership? There is a massive amount of people who will read a review on the story before they pick it up. If there's a 1% ratio of reviews/comments to hits, it looks really really bad. It makes the story look like nobody is actually reading it through. This is why stories get abandoned. They live in the author's head, rent free.

I don't have to write it out honestly, I can keep it to myself if people don't want to review it. My Naruto fic is complete inside my head, the ending is set, I don't need to do anything more. So if people don't tell me they want to read it, then I'm not gunna write it. Like it's a pretty straight forward concept people seem to misunderstand.

And I get it, writing is supposed to be fun and stuff, but there's time and effort put in to making it work and keeping characters in character, in editing, in making the story read more enjoyable. Why would anyone put themselves into free labour for nothing in return?

It's just shitty, if I'm being honest, that people don't realize their stories are more likely to get put to the side if they don't show interest. Me personally, I comment and review everything I read, even if it isn't great, because I understand how important that fucking is.

Well, rant over, I guess, but I'm just super fucking salty.

And to those that do review, you're amazing. I have 3 loyal readers that I'm genuinely writing just for them, that's it. I hope they have warm sunshine and cool pillows.

[the1975attheirverybest]

oh fuck those people and what they think!! I know it’s easier said than done but the internet shouldn’t be stressing you out. Allow yourself to take a step back and detox a bit. And if you don’t want to do that you can do other things like turn off (anon) asks or go in-app. If people want to be shitty then they won’t like you more if you listen to/ review songs by an artist that you don’t enjoy (even if you suddenly gave her stellar reviews!!) I’d suggest you listen to music you actually like/ wanna hear to make you feel better. "Give Yourself A Try" by The 1975 is a good song for that. Ever heard of it ;)

Sending you a big hug

P.S.:

And why would you believe you could control how you're perceived

When at your best, you're intermediately versed in your own feelings?

You are so kind thank you so much 🥹🩷🩷

Ahhhhh yeah I often want to quote Sincerity Is Scary back to Matty so this is really saying a lot hahahaha.

I think I might be due for a mini break actually. There are some irl things in my life that I need to focus on so that gives me something to think about. Maybe next week.

Thank you for the support and reality check 🤍

[eurofox]

Like a dragon/Yakuza: The man who erased his name review

This was way better than ishin!. Lot's of spoilers

I had low expectations for this because I'd heard it was just planned DLC that was quickly turned into a full length game but it's great.

The story moves along at a far quicker pace than usual but that was to be expected, it's a small timeline that's confined to 7 and 8's story. I saw people say they didn't understand why this existed at all and that kiryu's story should have ended with 6 but frankly I'm glad we're getting more. I found 6's ending to be kind of shitty and I want to know how the bodyguard situation came to be

Kiryu is so fucking miserable in this game and the voice actor does a great job conveying it. Even all his little ordinary task phrases are just so fed up sounding. The end scene were he's breaking down actually had me tear up a little, first time in the whole series.

Akame is basically the Florist again, but less annoying. I was meh on her at first but she grew on me

The baddies are pretty good with how short the game is and shishido was a good rep for all the guys at the bottom who are left floundering with the dissolution. Tsureno was a great character, I'd like to see more of him. The kpop nishitani guy was ok, but I'd prefer they just killed him off instead of having him repeatedly survive.

The plot itself is the usual over the top nonsense, and it does tie it all in fairly well. Kiryu swanning about in the world's shittiest disguise required a serious suspension of disbelief though. As well as characters not using guns when they should have. I know some characters saw through the obvious bullshit but still. The castle ship not being found by police was also kind of silly but we've already had purgatory so whatever (i prefer castle to purgatory, more flair). The whole daidoji thing was strange at times, but I guess they'll flesh them out more in future games. The big final battle alonside the jimas' was cool, even if kiryu couldn't really acknowledge them. Felt bad for Daigo though, only one shocked he's alive and he isn't allowed to speak to the guy. Also LOL at Watase getting stabbed in his Peter griffin fit, so unnecassary. Also he didn't delete the footage he just broke the phone screen

Combat was really good, agent was a nice change of pace and yakuza felt powerful, exactly what i wanted after Ishin and it's low damage dealing. Rocket shoes are my new favourite thing, drones were a bit shite though. Progression is straightforward, no fuckign around with random trainers, just pay with your yen and get the moves. Did seem like my grabs failed most of the time though, but I did rush things. Some great Long battles, again an area I felt ishin was lacking

Music is fine, mostly the long battle themes that stood out. Can't remember most of the boss themes. Good karaoke selection.

Still lots of mini games despite being a kind of filler entry. Lots of master system games, although i found them all a bit shite. Live action hostess clubs are uncomfortable and weird. Sonic the fighters is great still. The joryu clan thing wasn't bad but I'm glad the DLC characters were included in the sale I found because fucking hell they were not worth it. All this time I wanted playable Daigo and when they finally allow it he only has a bare bones move set. The fucking AI daigo has more moves so what the hell?

Sub stories only being through the Akame network is odd. Half are really good ones with lots of throw backs to earlier games and half are tedious 'go there and fight this guy' for your colosseum team missions. I couldn't get one to trigger despite fulfilling conditions so there's that. Also the walk around missions are boring.

The akame network and the colosseum were used as filler during the story and that got old very fast.

Really enjoyed this game and I'm hyped for 8.

Things I liked:

Emotional gut punch of an ending

Cool throwback substories

Ghost substory

Akame isn't bad as far as female yakuza characters go and they didn't kill her off/send her to her planet that needs her at the end

Ties up things

Great long battles

Agent style is a nice change

Finally get Playable Daigo!

Things I didn't like:

Some tedious substories (red peacocks anybody?)

Kiryu's dumbass disguise

Obvious filler missions

Playable Daigo isn't very good!

[madecanary]

(  NICHOLAS  GALITZINE  |  CIS  MALE  |  HE  +  HIM  |  TWENTY  -  ONE  )  — — —  it's  just  been  another  long  week  in  boring  -  ass  hawkins.  isn't  that  right,  WILLIAM  BYERS?  shit,  i  guess  they  can't  hear  me  over  WHY  CAN'T  I  TOUCH  IT?  by  BUZZCOCKS  playing  through  the  headphones  of  their  walkman.  it  looks  like  they're  gonna  be  late  for  WORK  as  a  SALES  ASSOCIATE  at  FAMILY  VIDEO.  did  you  know  WILL  has  been  in  hawkins  for  HIS  ENTIRE  LIFE?  yeah,  their  family  and  friends  describe  them  as  GENTLE,  but  i've  seen  them  be  RESERVED  too  !  i  would  also  say  they  remind  me  of  a  wound  in  the  shape  of  a  boy, raw-bitten  lips  as  sweet  as  they  are  sour,  an  intolerable  tenderness  nestled  in  a  center  that  cannot  hold,  splotches  of  ink  littered  haphazardly  across  flushed  skin,  eyes  rife  with  mischief  and  melancholy  in  equal  amounts,  but  is  that  weird  ?  i  guess  nothing's  too  weird  for  this  little  town,  huh  ?  — — —  (  dev,  any,  25,  est  )

usually found trying his best to not visibly judge family video's patrons and their taste in film, doodling on scrap paper, bobbing his head to whichever mix he's listening to now, with his head in a book, getting away with being a little shit in the background, and being soooo normal 😁👍 (lies) prominent traits empathetic, coy, pragmatic, anxious, sweet, sensitive, pixyish, prone to keeping things in & then exploding, self-sacrificing, frank mini anachronistic playlist climbing up the walls (radiohead), i'm just a kid (simple plan), prey (the neighborhood), i wanna be adored (the stone roses), basket case (green day), good feeling (violent femmes), unloveable (the smiths), my love mine all mine (mitski)

bridging the gap

whatever dreams will had of going to college were momentarily completely and totally squandered by The Horrors and Their Consequences. he went through a lot, year after year, and leaving the nest to venture out into the great unknown by himself right after just... wasn't in the cards for him yet. he wasn't quite ready, didn't know how to reconcile what he felt with the life he was living and the one he wanted to live. so, he stuck around.

got a job at family video because if the abysmal reviews in the local paper were anything to go by, then clearly this town was in great need of at least one person with good taste to guide them, and who else could it be but him, your resident movie buff? he's been there for a minute—probably over a year now—and he likes it. he likes it a lot, actually, and probably abuses his employee discounts lmao.

a lot can happen in two years, especially two years of peace, so i'd like to think will continued his self-realization journey he was on in canon and is in a better place than he was. he's in this unique position of simultaneously being both hypervisible (widespread gay rumors & bullying have existed since forever, and his family dropped hints throughout the years lol) and invisible (it doesn't stop girls from barking up the wrong tree; some doubt still exists), and he'd use that to his advantage. it isn't safe to be fully out, but i think... that if you need to know, you'd know. ...you know? so, not out-out, but not making a concerted effort to appear otherwise. you either notice his flags and put two and two together, or you don't. does that make sense? his family absolutely knows, and i do imagine he'd want his chosen family to know and love the real him, too.

considering his unfathomably shitty luck in life, he probably spent most of that first year of peace waiting for the other shoe to drop, and only finally exhaled when november came and went without any issues. still doesn't know what he wants to do with his life (does he go the practical route and do something with computer science? or does he chase after his pipe dream and pursue art?), but he did enroll in some gen ed classes at the local community college with intentions to transfer someday, so that's progress. he still feels so behind, like he should have moved on by now, but baby steps are still steps.

so, y'know. he was living that small town life. getting by, shooting the shit, trying to not shit his pants thinking about The Future. everything was fine! so great, so normal. until. :)))))))) he started not being able to sleep as well as he used to. started feeling anxious, not entirely alone. he thought it was just... him, y'know? he knows he has ptsd, he knows that life isn't always as easy for him as it is for others — he made peace with that. but... he thought he was getting better, that things were finally starting to look up for him. and now this?

he hasn't told anyone. his options are both shitty: either he's so scared of growing up that he's getting bad again (and then he has to be the mentally ill one, ugh!) or it's not just him and they really are in danger (and now they have to fight for their lives again, great!). nightmare scenario no matter what. but it's probably fine. it's just his brain turning his fear of the unknown and unfamiliar into something that he does know and is intimately familiar with. it's — no, yeah. that's probably it. right...?

so, basically, old habits die hard and will has fallen back into the routine of pretending that everything is fine and soooo very normal, unaware that he looks and acts like a prey animal to anyone with eyes. if he has bags under his eyes, no he doesn't. if he's been listening to should i stay or should i go? again, no he hasn't. if he's extra quiet, extra jumpy, and a little more sensitive than usual, well. what happened to minding our own business, huh? 🤨 can't a man be a freak in peace? could someone going through it do this? (cue will giving himself a choppy wolf cut in shitty midnight bathroom lighting). it's literally so fine!!!!!!! (<- lying again)

he may... have to start opening up a little bit, though, given the latest murders. maybe. but only if you promise to not get mad... 🙄👉👈

extra tidbits

it's very important to me that will has a little gay hoop earring that someone gave him at like three am during a sleepover on a random whim. sometimes he wants to buy a pearl and serve full on girl with a pearl earring realness, but he also doesn't want to get hatecrimed, so. little innocuous hoop it is 💛

joining the war on smoking on the side of smoking by following in s1's historical accuracy footsteps and making will an occasional smoker. and yes, he does still bum cigarettes knowing full well he has a pack of his own on him (we love a scammer) + it's been a lil bit more than occasional ever since the return of The Horrors :(

i'll still be writing will as a sweetheart of course, but bitchy will is so near and dear to me. his season three WHO CARESSSSSS 🙄 & cracking up at the boys getting dumped & you weren't with her? 🤨😒 & general #imwithher vibes and season four sighing and rolling his eyes and calling others out etc mean Everything to me. get their ass, william!!! sigh and bitch and moan and complain, as is your right!!!

will had that hair you see in the second gif, but he cut it recently and now it looks like the first and third gif. is this because i'm indecisive? perhaps....

he still loves dnd + still the same old geek + still loves [video] games + please hang out with him he wants to hang out can he come over to hang out or do you want to come over to hang out when are y'all gonna hang out bc he just told me he wants to hang out. btw