#shitposting made eternal

[honeytrap-graham]

there should be some way to alert your mutuals you died or something…

[fantomette22]

Godfrey is not just the step dad... he's the dad that stepped up!!!

I am so sorry for whatever this is but I really needed to get out of my head and picture the "Godfrey is not the step dad but the dad that stepped up to Messmer"

Original meme from here?

I mean it's still very unclear if he's indeed the father or not of Messmer, thanks to this talisman in the Shadow keep.

Some people said it could be Radagon too but hear me out.

I think that when Marika ascend to godhood/before Godfrey arrived in the picture I really wouldn't been surprised if she managed to be able to have kids all by herself you know. Like she's a god it made sense. I'm pretty sure it's totally the case for Melina. Also the daughters of rot are right there! Parthenogenesis of empyrean real But all the other exemple are all girls like in nature... it's a bit odd for Messmer but idk maybe the abyssal serpent blessed/cursed Marika because she wanted to vengeance or something and boom Messmer.

Anyway all of this to say that if Godfrey is indeed the step dad, I think he might have try to stepped up for Messmer a bit and i think this memes would fit well XD

[bookwyrminspiration]

had a dream I was reading a new keeper book and y’all would’ve LOVED the pyrokinetic cycles so so unfair you don’t get to see it or my stupid shitposts about it </3

[fuukonomiko]

I know I did this a while back but now that Tumblr has polls I got all excited and wanted to do this :D

[erabundus]

ren's  hair  is  very  soft  and  smooth  and  doesn't  tangle  easily  —  which  is  good,  because  he  basically  does  nothing  to  it.

[apocalyptic-dancehall]

shaming handsome jack's hands should be a thing he's got massive fucking grippers

[nightandstarseternal]

one thing about me is I use to carry a little tin box of sauce packets to school everyday because i was so obsessed with mayo i had to eat it with every meal and then two months later they started selling 40p sauce packets at the lunch que

therefore i influenced historical change

[sneppu]

Hello! Welcome to The Sneep Zone

You may call me Nagi

Main blog: @nagoo (I'm also on Bluesky! absolutely NO MINORS on the bluesky, no exceptions. nsfw art will be going there.)

@headmasterseverussnape and @sevsbestfriend are my beloveds

u better be able to tell fiction from reality i stg.

first and foremost: fuck jkr. i do not endorse her. i do not agree with her. we dont do that weird shit here.

we do different weird shit instead (bask in the decadence of The Sneep)

This sideblog is for me to post all my Snape art and Snape related ramblings! I am addicted to snape fics, and have found myself needing to make fanart for some of my favorite writers. such things will be posted here!

Severus Snape is my favorite guy!

I am known to refer to him as: Sneep, Snorp, Sneb, The Sneberous Sneb, The Snebulous One, He Who Sneeps In The Dark, SneepSnorp, Mother, Sneppu, El Sneepo, Snorpo, Snib, The Best One, The Only One That Matters, The Community Boyfriend, Babygirl, etc.

rest assured, I am talking about Severus Snape every single time

I ship him with everyone! yes, even [insert character]. I always tag ships so block the tag or w/e if theres one you dont like.

I truly and genuinely, from the bottom of my heart, do not care even a little bit about The Grievances u may have about my ships or my sneeps. I cannot stress enough how much that is not my problem. If you're the type to throw a tantrum over ships and fictional content I'm just gonna block you tbh.

Dark/Fucky content WILL be found on this blog. Snape was practically MADE for that shit and I like to project my traumas onto him so like. ykno. I expect ppl with critical thinking on here ONLY.

in my ideal world, everyone would love and cherish Sneep. I tend to focus on marauder's era Snape

not to be rude, but i kind of only care about Snape really. the slytherins are cool and chill too (especially Lucius, Rosier, and Mulciber), but i mostly care about how they interact with and potentially fall in love with The Sneep. the marauders are rat bastards and i ship them with Snape in a "grovel eternally for the scraps of his affection" kind of way. I am not sorry.

dont expect nothing serious from me unless im waxing poetic about Snape or heavily projecting my own Tragic Past onto him tbh, and even then...

i have zero interest in any debates whatsoever. i cannot emphasize this enough, my thoughts are disjointed and nonsensical. The mere thought of having a serious debate about anything is stressful and unpleasant. I mean it as kindly as possible when I say it makes my eyes glaze over.

i am just here to draw Snape and shitpost about my favorite little guy.

i dont care that he's mean.

he shouldve been meaner, actually.

he's better than me and he's probably better than you too, because i wouldve absolutely lost it big boy style.

Art tag: #nagi nyart

Have you ever written a fanfic about Severus Snape? If so, please PLEASE read this post Here

this shouldnt even have to be said but please do not??? take me stuffs and completely re-upload it without credit or permission?? dont do that to anyone, actually? like idk basic courtesy towards artists or w/e. you know better, i know you do.

BUT that said.. using my stuff for your header or profile pic is fine with credit somewhere easily visible, like the profile description, or pinned post!

[team-avia]

Love ur game, thank u for the brainrot (This is the 3rd week). Enjoy this shitpost I made

thank u for the art! it is very accurate

sadly there is no cure for the brainrot, it is eternal /j

-bee

[liesmyth]

friends. romans. countrymen. lend me your ear

listen. I know we joke that Ianthe is terrible but truly, is she really? No, she’s not. She’s not even in the top 5 worst people of the cast. Yeah, she did war crimes off page, and also did gaslight her crush for shit and giggles, and that is bad. But by canon standards, she's very far from The Worst, and yet we insist to treat her as such. This is injust.

inb4 what about Babs: WHAT about Babs, really? Ianthe killed someone she maybe liked a tiny bit but didn’t paticularly care about, and gained eternal life and immense powers. like, yeah, killing is Bad, but who hasn’t done a spot of killing in the Houses. She made an excellent bargaign, then she immediately fucked off to God Space Station to swoon at Augustine and invade Harrow’s personal space, and didn’t do any killing at all.*

*planets excluded

Meanwhile Corona went to Terrorist Bootcamp and then to Burning People Alive Compound and she got them to trust her, so you know hot girl has done shit (not judging! I think it’s hot of her! But we are sleeping on the Corona side of the war crimes tally, as a fandom)

anyway. I'm coming out as a Ianthe Apologist and starting 2023 with the type  of energy I wish to take into my future (cit. Ianthe). She did some things that were wrong! But not that many, tbh. She’s the only person getting shit done, and she does it with flair. I love and support her and always will <3

[this is 70% a shitpost, I am open to being dragged but do it lovingly. askbox is open if you want to fight <3 (affectionate) ]

[bigkickguy]

drew this cause my bf made a funny edit about how he hates the eternals grind in granblue but he still thinks seofon is cool so I made this shitpost to cheer him on

[static-scribblez]

The following shitpost is a parody of Will Wood’s infamous Wednesday rant, I made this for shits and giggles only (also tumblr seems to like it when I post abt Will and bitch (/j) abt these random ass indie animation series about hell) - HH/HB fans and HH/HB critics are both allowed to interact with this, as long as the fans are aware that Vivienne Medrano is a piece of shit and the critics and fans don’t get into arguments with eachother

Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss are not only the greatest betrayals in Indie Animation history but the most maddeningly trite, disturbingly vapid, and internally confused ideological train wrecks I've ever had the deeply sorrowful displeasure of allowing to pass through my corneas may god have mercy on all of us who are fated to live in a world where something so culturally, socially, politically, and artistically noxious as these Mary-sue-lead and Gary-stu-lead, transparently Tumblr-targeted, vaguely bigoted, backfired virtue-signaling, fake leftist capitalist "my immortal"-esque fanfics both earn second seasons through what can only be explained as manufactured consent. Something must be done about Vivziepop’s/Spindle Horse’s Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss. These things are a condescending insult, especially to young people, the socially conscious, and members of marginalized and "'"outcast"'" groups (LiKe DeMoNs & ppL who dON’t wAnt To wAtCH tHEir CItiZens DIE EVERY YEARRRRR) who genuinely suffer from what these things hollowly masturbates to while looking us dead in the eyes and saying "yeah, you like that, don't you?" They are Gatling guns of random buzzwords and empty references to social issues, grotesquely and impotently disguised and screaming "I'm commentary!" before pissing its pants and squealing like a pig. I am shitting. I am pissing. I am standing over a warm bubble bath cradling a toaster and sobbing, chanting g-d's secret name and praying that there is indeed a hell so I can be eternally punished for having given this moral abomination one fraction of a fraction of a cent also they’re not good interpretations of hell anyway

[irrelevant-wikipedia-articles]

shaking you by the lapels I spent a whole 25 minutes reading through Sofija Smetonienė's wiki page to find just WHAT a Lithuanian First Lady did that relates to a tumblr shitpost about poorly made scifi mechs. Can you imagine the abject rage and anguish I felt when I saw your url? Fuck you, your gimmick is absolutely stupid and frankly, you don't deserve to be called a gimmick blog at all. If there existed a catalogue of tumblr gimmick blogs, yours would be recorded as one of the most devious yet base of nature to be ever created. I hope one of your posts blows up and you get asks calling you a deceiving cunt for all eternity. Fuck you truly and dearly.

Followed.

this is the nicest ask ive ever gotten

[the-witchs-cafe]

Directory | BYF | Witch Essays

Hello, hello! And welcome to the Witch's Cafe! Have you gotten weary? The crushing loneliness of your own self-torment became way too much? Fret not- this establishment is here for all witches; those who have fallen from the greatest of heights, to those who have been left with nothing at all.

Here in this little coffee bar settling between the cosmos, our customers have traveled far and wide just to socialize and find solace within their shared agonies- some managing to cross through universes; so be on the lookout for those whose faces you might have the luck to recognize!

We also herald our existence with this flag- oh, don't you worry! This flag is free for anyone to use, even if all our operations were to cease!

With all that being said, I'm certain you would like to know the way through these halls;

#Witching Hours: The customer list! Go right ahead and greet yourself to these fine folks! Maybe you'll find more similarities between yourselves than you would intially assume. (Gen. tag for crossover witches made by other people)

#Registered Witches: What cafe would this be if we didn't have any regulars? Recognized their choices of beverages just like the back of my hands! If you wish for a story, they're your go-to's! (Witch essays written by either mod H.N Elly or mod Charlotte)

#Witch cards: Every now and then, familiar faces start popping up more than usual; not as much as our regulars, but it is fun to observe their activities, even if from a distance. (same as the above, but in the form of much smaller witch cards)

#Would Witch Out: Passerby's and their rumors...honestly, you couldn't blame a gal for eavesdropping every now and then, no? Not even while getting the latest scoop on who was the poor soul whose destiny caught up with them? (due to the shutdown of YFWWO and in order to give its mod a break, I've opened up operations here. Submissions are now CLOSED!)

#Would Survive PMMM: Of course, some folks do happen to be naturally lucky; finding a way and reason to keep going forwards even in the darkest of nights...it's admirable, maybe a little enviable, don't ya think? (The complete opposite of the above; if you know a character who would cakewalk through this universe's trials and tribulations, let us know with the full details regarding why!)

#There Is a Pipe Bomb in your Mailbox: Those lil' misfits out there and what tricks they got on their sleeves- ah, what fun would it be if I didn't allow any tomfoolery every now and then? (The joke submissions tag)

#There is no Secret Menu!: (The shitpost tag; hey, the great Italian poet, Dante Alighieri, had called his little self-insert fanfic in which he and Virgil went through all sects of the afterlife "The Divine Comedy" for a reason, right? We all need a reason to crack up since we're gonna be in our self-inflicted torment and punishments for some time.)

#You're now listening to . . .: Solace can be nice every once in a while, but a nice tune to distract yourself from the pain and get in the mood to continue working on your eternal goals is just as comforting! (general audio tag)

I do also have to warn ya'll that we also have to abide by the blacklist; yeah, we do try to cater to all that enter these doors, but an eldritch horror needs to have some standards, ya know?

Hetalia

Country Humans/Country Balls

Any of the media created by Okegom/DeepSeaPrisoner

Minecraft SMPs, especially Dream SMP

Building upon the above, we do not take requests for real world figures, unless if they were obvious jokes. This includes, and is not limited to, youtubers, musicians, pop idols, and individual game developers.

Percy Jackson

Harry Potter

Palworld

Genshin Impact (x)

UrbanSpook // The Painter

Good Omens, and other works by Neil Gaiman (x)

Omori (x)

[beepborpdoodledorp]

i love how only like 10% of tadc fanart is actually embracing the existential psychological horror element of the unthinkably mortifying concept of being trapped in a digital torture simulation for eternity without even the comfort of your memories or being in your own body while the other 90% is the stupidest most ridiculous shitposts you could possibly think of (most still made with genuinely fantastic art which somehow makes them even funnier) and i am here for it

[nahualnextdoor]

Character Analysis for Shitpost's Sake (long post; tw suicide discussion):

A funny haha, a whimsy silly image. Something I did in like 10 minutes...

Well behind the scenes I spent an entire night dissecting every episode and book paragraph in my head just to see what box fits what character (I take my silly guys very seriously and my shitposts should represent their characterizations accurately otherwise I'll kill myself).

So, here we go.

Active suicide risk: (literally anyone except Cleo and Six)

-Resus: Pretty obvious and intuitive in my opinion. Our favorite trans allegory emo boy that literally sleeps in a coffin. Hates pretty much every aspect of his life, thinks he's a disappointment to his family simply for existing (and sadly kinda is), and is pretty much fine with death as a whole (most of his friends already went trough it, after all).

-Luke: This one was also pretty obvious in my opinion. While not as clear cut or active as Resus, there was this one time where he decided to banish himself to the Underlands, no hesitation, as soon as he found out (or rather was made to believe) he attacked his parent. He's very often ostracizing himself over his lycanthropy hurting those around him, and for the major part of the book series he believed himself to be a burden for his parents. (Also he has like. Zero sense of self-preservation, at least in the tv show).

-Luella: Oh boy. Where do I begin with you girl. Just her living situation alone is sad enough, add in her attachment issues, her lack of control over her emotions, her crush on a guy that treats her... horribly, and her lack of any meaningful friendship in her life up until she became bffs with Cleo in s2. Honestly I'm just glad that by the end of s2 she's mostly content with her life the way it is, but still... at least on the episodes before she got her shit together, I'd say she's kinda worrying.

-Dixon: Yeah this guy's life is just hell lol. I'm not really getting any suicidal vibes out of him, but it is more than plausible.

10/10:

-Cleo: She's just... I love her 🙏🙏 Badass, one of the most interesting characters of the tv show in my opinion, autistic as fuck (they all are, but she's the one I relate to the most), curses the entire town in order to fix her problems and is pretty much happy despite being in an eternal sisyphean cycle.

Needs to retake the am I gay quiz:

-Resus: self explanatory I think. He really needs to get his shit together because I just cannot tolerate when he's all over Luella "oh luella I need your help with this spell and also brain drain dumped me in a wet cardboard box and killed my grandma 🥺🥺" and then going "well thanks for nothing, fuck u and ur stupid useless magic, also even tho we're nothing I will get all possessive over u at the slightest possibility of u liking Luke hey can we kiss to save the world btw" She deserves so much better than him omg. Boy you're queer!!! Leave her alone and just stay with the werewolf!!!

Cannibalised first in plane crash scenario:

-Resus: I just thought this was funny lol

Adderal prescription ASAP:

-Luke: Also pretty self explanatory. Lycantrophy is the magical equivalent of autism and adhd in this universe, I don't make the rules. Both in the books and in the show he's shown having a hard time focusing on class, finding it easier to just focus on his videogames. He spends hours playing on his console, to the point of ignoring his baisc needs, and is pretty hyperactive in my opinion, at least in the show. Really I wish they'd bring back the idea of Eeafa (or maybe even Luella) figuring out a potion or spell to help him manage his wild side, wich, to me at least, is not only his wolf self, but all of his neurodivergent tendencies in general (basically it would be magical meds that makes you have more control over the wolf form on top helping you study).

Missing person:

-Pretty much all the other kids from the books but I choose Kian because he's kinda the one that has the most relevance and the only one with an available image on the internet that is not a 3 pixels wide scan on the Internet Archive (still love them tho). He could potentially be on active suicide risk once he gets old enough to understand what happened to his parents tho, but thinking about that for more than 5 seconds makes me cry so I prefer not to.

And that is basically it! Thank you for listening to my ramblings and analysis of these silly little guys that keep rotating on my head like rotisserie chicken ballerinas. Next will probably be my still pending character analysis for why I assigned the slimes I did on my slime rancher post.