#shiroikumo

[hyruleanlegends]

@shiroi---kumo asked: ❛ are you always this straightforward with strangers ? ❜ | FIRST MEETING STARTERS | Accepting

The words had Groose pausing for a moment, feeling a little taken aback at being spoken to in such a manner. All he had commented on was that the stranger's hair was an unusual color - the shade of white was something he had only ever seen before on Impa (and he didn't like to think too much about Impa; there was an ache that was left behind when he remembered Granny's passing).

His clothing was a little odd too. Oh - and the fact that he was on the surface.

Surface dwellers were becoming more and more common of late. A large portion of the citizens of Skyloft had 'taken the plunge', so to speak, choosing to relocate on the ground in the homestead that Link and Zelda had started together. Groose himself planned to make the surface his permanent home soon too, and the only thing holding him back was worry over how those who wanted to stay above the clouds would fair. They had survived for countless years, but was it really a place meant for them to live indefinitely?

"I was just asking a question." A pause. A frown. "Where'd you come from, anyways?"

[fairlybeloved]

@shiroi---kumo

"Everything hurts."

That was what he wanted to say, spectacularly failing to achieve the ends. He was seeing stars, twinkling little lights exploding in his vision in a way that couldn't be disrupted with a rapid blinking of the eyes. Very much like it was when the gaze flitted across the open sky, straying over the blinding light of the sun. It hurt and was memorizing, all at once!

He could hear a voice speaking from some distant plain, a series of echoing sounds of various tones mingled together, it was impossible to discern one from the other enough to piece together the signature markings of a real conversation [or maybe just the sounds of the real world filtering through?].

“Uuughgg.” Came the only response he could muster, which could roughly be translated to 'uuuugggffhhhhhrrrr' ancient speak for 'paaaiiiin.' It was something between a moan and a cry, body swelling with renewed life, a hand daring to break free of its spot curled at his side to massage his aching temples.

Focus was fleeting, but it shifted to regard the only figure he could discern through the haze.

Chapped lips parted, and he chewed on his words silently for a moment, or perhaps it just took that long to get started. "You---" He couldn't really hear anything substantial outside the ringing of his ears. He didn't even know if he was speaking plainly enough to be understood, however disjointed those words were.

"I know you---" Not really. They'd met. Briefly. Very briefly. Hm. He didn't even remember how it ended, or if it ended. That was an entire lifetime ago. "... I was hunting you." How ironic. His name had been---

Something weird. Something he couldn't pronounce.

[fiiirsthero]

@shiroi---kumo liked for a starter

For someone who had lived as long as he had, it was hard to see anything that could come as a surprise. Most people were not happy to be told that there was very rarely ever anything new or original, a concept that applied to people just as much as it applied to creative endeavors. Things always happened in a cycle. Nothing was new.

So to see someone floating down from the sky didn't perturb him in the way it might have bothered another who was unfamiliar with the fact that people used to live above the clouds. It did confuse him, if only because Link had been certain all people of Skyloft had long-since left the floating cities - but what he felt was more concern and worry for them.

He didn't seem to be flying with the use of a loftwing, though. That... was unusual.

"Oi." He let his hand rest against the hilt of his sword as Link tilted his head up. "You lost or somethin'?"

[theyoungprinceling]

@shiroi---kumo

"If you want cookies, Opettaja Sielu makes the best ones."

"Blue offered to make some or eat cookie dough, but I wanted to try to do it myself. Clearly, that wasn't a good idea. The cookies aren't for me anyway, that's kinda the point...Otherwise I would just ask other people."

[flameleadsarc]

@shiroi---kumo + @forgotten-teammates

In the kitchen, packing the meals he prepared for himself in his bag, no one saw the Colonel’s hands shake. 

Kain’s worsened injury was the last straw. He didn’t wander far from the Comodeen, and yet—and yet—if White Cloud hadn’t found him in time… Roy wanted to just be thankful. He was thankful he could still look into his friend’s eyes every day. But, that emotion brought friends he didn’t care for, and they overstayed their welcome. Guilt flooded his veins whenever he looked at Kain, and he couldn’t stop himself from wondering if he helped cause the man to flee their safe haven in the first place. Anger followed shortly thereafter, lighting his blood on fire, as he dared to answer in the affirmative. 

Fear, though, was the most unwelcome. Heavier than the albatross, it sat on his chest and made it nearly impossible for him to breathe. Something attacked Kain and nearly killed him—he nearly died. What else existed in Wonderland? What other beasts roamed the lands for easy prey like those already injured like Edward? It hadn’t been that long since their excursion in the south. Neither of them fully recovered since then, and Edward couldn’t breathe like he used to. He couldn’t fight like he used to, and that was detrimental.  

Never mind Gaudium. And White Cloud couldn’t be everywhere at once to save the day. That was far too much to ask from one being, never mind one a dying one. 

He couldn’t keep asking White Cloud to search for his boys like this when he had much more pressing concerns to deal with. He couldn’t do that to his friend. Not only that, but he couldn’t… he couldn’t keep staying safe within the walls of the Comodeen doing what felt like nothing. Cleaning probably helped, and he taught himself Wonderlandian, but it wasn’t enough. Edward and Alphonse weren’t in his arms. For all he knew, they could be fending off beasts like what Kain dealt with or worse, or… or…

His breath hitched as he stopped packing for a few seconds. No, no no no no. He needed to push the memory down. He couldn’t let it resurface. All he needed to do was finish packing and—

“Colonel?”

Goddammit, she found him before he finished. 

Quiet as always, the Lieutenant appeared at his side without saying much, the question in her eyes as she met his gaze. Her stance said a lot for someone to someone who knew her: feet apart, as if ready to go at a second’s notice, but shoulders squared toward him to give him her undivided attention. Her eyes traveled to his bag and back to his eyes in milliseconds, a hint of concern present along with her business as usual. She wouldn’t say a word until he replied to her, and she wouldn’t leave his side until she got her answer. He knew that. With a heavy sigh, he stopped packing, and he turned toward her. 

“I only packed enough for me.” No, that was the wrong thing to say. She gave him a blank stare before she replied.

“I’ll be fine. When are we leaving?”

“… Ten minutes.” He raised an eyebrow. “You’re not trying to stop me, Lieutenant?”

“Trying to stop you will only end up with you being reckless without me. At least I can keep an eye on you this way.”

“As long as you’re sure.” His hands returned to packing the rest of his meals. Thankfully, he was almost done when the Lieutenant arrived. 

“My duty to you doesn’t waver, Sir. I will see you in ten minutes.” With a formal salute, the Lieutenant turned on her heel and walked back to her room. She had her weapons to prepare along with Hayate. While she did just get him back, a trip out into Wonderland wasn’t the wisest idea for him. There was no telling what they’d find out in the wild, and they didn’t know how long they would be gone. Hopefully, it wouldn’t be more than a few days, and the Comodeen wouldn’t miss them that much. They did just get most of the team back together. That, and leaving without saying goodbye… 

She was not in charge of this pseudo-mission, though. The Colonel was, and he did not deem it important to tell anyone else that he was leaving. He had one thought on his mind and nothing else: his boys. After seeing the two of them return to Central… she wished she could blame him.

[proserphinas]

@shiroi---kumo keeps trying to warn.❛ Better get out while you can. ❜

She's using her leg as a brace, but even with every force of concentration, the automail's gears can't force the monster off of her. She can feel its hot breath on her face as it continues to snap its jaws. Weren't the hours spent training with Riza meant to help her in one of these moments? But the rat... if it even could be considered such a thing, was overpowering in every sense of the word. Even her knife is out of reach-

She just needs an opening, a chance to run back to the Comodeen. But this thing is unrelenting, and a part of her knows she won't make it back in one piece, if at all.

That is until she sees him-

"Isoveli!"

White Cloud's attack sends the rodent-like monster scrambling and right back into the underground burrow it emerged from. All Mar can do is watch as she tries to collect her breath. What was with his perfect timing in her life? She should be grateful, but it's all still a bit too much to comprehend.

A hand is offered out to her, and she takes it without hesitation. She rises from the ground, dusting herself off from the caked-on mud and dirt. There's that inevitable questioning as to why she was even out here in the first place. The girl huffs, bending over to grab her knife, "I got tired of sittin' around. I can only explain so many times to Cid how automail works for his research; better off gettin' Ed to make'm the new specimen."

A heavily shaded lie to hide her true intentions, more so, the undercurrents of turmoil laid dormant in her heart. Frustration from the adults' lack of action, fear for the worst to have befallen, and her own heart broken from the idea that two people in her twisted-up family may never come back to them.

She slides the blade back into the holster on her belt. "I'm not goin' back to the Comodeen until at least I can give them all more than 'we don't know, but we can hope.' Hope alone... it's stupid."

If he wanted to accompany her, he was more than welcome, but Mar folded her arms in defiance as if to say, 'You can try to take me back, but I'll kick and scream the entire time.' && more surprisingly, he didn't immediately try to force her into returning to the Comodeen.

Instead, a compromise is made. They will go back by the end of the day, especially since Mar didn't bring enough provisions for two to last more than a day or two. For now, he'll humor her and let her peer under every hidden spot in this forest for the boys.

As they walk along, any attempts of conversation have been pretty surface-level. Questions about this place, and were there any other villages around here...She wants to trust White Cloud with those thoughts from before. And he has been more than willing to listen to her before. So, is it not safe to do so now?

After a brief moment of silence, she begins, "You've always been honest with me, Isoveli." This forest, it was far enough away from the Comodeen. They wouldn't have to worry about peering eyes and ears listening into their words, "Aurora, she's a sugar coater. She lies through her teeth so I don't worry about anything.... and I think she's doing the 'they're okay because they have to be' thing to placate Roy's nerves too."

She swallows, her throat holding a significant amount of tension when she asks, "Do you think Edward 'n Alphonse are... dead?" Even she can feel the weight of that sentence hit her stomach like a stone.

Or is it the ground shaking?

It seems this grim question is left in the air because they're not alone anymore. The ground itself shatters into chunks as they're sent sky-high. The thunder of a few trees slamming against one another. Mar's fall is broken by a few tree limbs, and the eventual final drop to the uneven ground. She risks mechanical failure by allowing her automail to take the full brunt of the drop unless she'd rather have a broken leg on the other side of her body. And so, she chooses the automail.

She's on the ground, groaning from the pain. Fuck, that hurt. She heard a wire snap too. Dammit... Cid is going to have to help her investigate that. Can her toes move? Yes, her knee? Barely but it's there.

Then comes the scent of blood, but it's not too much. A tiny stream of blood is pouring from her nose, and her arm has a small slash in it. Nothing she couldn't handle.

"Isoveli, are you okay?" She asks hoarsely, turning over her body to face where she last saw the Misterican. Instead, she spots what looks like a standoff between Kumo and what seems to be the mother of the rat monster.

He's suggesting that she make a run for it.

Or is it a soft order?

"I can't... Kumo- I can't leave you; I don't know where to go."

Should she mention that her leg really doesn't seem to be fairing? Possibly, but she almost forgets that note. (Given that he's about to be eaten by a huge Rat!) "Stun it, and we can run!"

[deathleadsarc]

@shiroi---kumo | cont.

―    🜛    ―    rather  than  deadlifting  him,  she  took  a  note  of  his  body's  response  to  her  touch  and  chose  to  simply  allow  him  to  use  her  as  a  sort  of  crutch  until  they  reached  the  rooms  again.  It  was  not  as  if  she  desired  such  close  contact  with  strangers,  even  if  it  was  a  part  of  her  career,  so  his  discomfort  was  just  as  strong  as  her  own.  Truly,  if  ever  there  was  a  way  to  level  with  this  Alchemist,  it  was  in  this  manner.  Regardless  of  discomfort,  she  could  as  well  concur  that  no  matter  what,  the  both  of  them  were  overdue  for  compensation  for  the  inconvenience.  She  ought  to  be  home,  getting  together  her  texts  and  notes  and  all,  caring  for  Basker  and  preparing  to  leave  Amestris  with  Atlas!

And  this  one,  White  Cloud,  ought  to  be  off  doing  whatever  it  was  he'd  been  doing  since  before  her  arrival  there.  To  her  knowledge,  and  according  to  Roy,  it  was  a  matter  of  not  only  discovering  how  they'd  gotten  here  and  how  to  get  back,  but  his  objective  seemed  to  go  far  beyond  her  pay-grade  of  problem-solving.  To  the  left,  and  straight  back  down  the  hall  at  a  steady  pace.  The  thought  occurred  to  her  that  she  hadn't  a  clue  who  the  true  enemy  in  their  midst  was.  Highly  untrusting  as  she  was,  if  aiding  this  lot  in  their  quest  to  kill  someone    ―    well,  that  was  something  the  Belladonna  was  well  versed  in.  

Perhaps  Roy  would  remark  that  the  situation  did  not  require  such  drastic  measures.  .  .  she  couldn't  be  sure.  But  as  she  came  to  the  threshold  of  his  room,  she  knew  of  one  thing  that  at  least  made  itself  bare  to  her  thoughts  ―  as  always,  if  she  needed  to  kill  to  return  home,  she  would  indeed  do  so.  Willingly.  With  naught  care  toward  any  who  may  oppose  her.  It  was  the  only  thing  that  she  could  find  comfort  in,  and  the  only  thing  that  could  for  certain  return  her  to  Atlas.  

in  tentative  steps  do  they  return  to  the  room  as  he'd  guided  her,  heading  straight  for  his  bed  so  that  he  may  have  a  lie  down.  Even  such  a  short  excursion  had  managed  to  leave  her  completely  winded,  so  she  could  not  tell  if  he  needed  further  assistance  before  her  body  retired  to  the  nearby  chair.  Heavily  breathing  and  groaning  in  pain.

          "  As  you  can  hear,  I  did  not  get  any  farther  than  you.  It  is  not  within  my  character  to  ignore  my  medications  but  alas!  Well.  You  were  there,  and  all.  "        relaxing  in  the  chair,  she  could  feel  her  bun  loosening  but  made  no  move  to  return  it  to  perfection.  Rather,  she  turned  her  head  toward  him  and  chose  her  next  words  carefully.        "  Roy  is  far  more  understanding  and  open  to  the  world  than  I,  but  even  for  him  I  can  tell  he  holds  his  disbelief at  the  tip  of  his  tongue.  I  have  already  told  him  that  I  will  do  what  I  must  to  return  to  my  home.  Our  home.  "

a  sigh,  turning  her  head  toward  the  ceiling  with  eyes  closed.        "  Quite  honestly,  I  consider  that  man  to  be  a  bit  too  soft  to  hold  the  position  he  is  in.  He  is  too  kind  and  utterly  foolish  to  be  pursuing  the  title  he  wishes  to  have.  Even  still,  there  is  a  fair  amount  of  trust  between  the  two  of  us  as  not  only  Alchemists,  but  as  Amestrians.  What  I'm  trying  to  articulate  is  that  I  believe  what  Roy  has  told  me  thus  far.  What  I  need  now  is  to  hear  it  all  from  you.  "

        "  And  so,  my  first  query.  What  is  it  we  are  up  against,  and  how  can  it  be  killed?  "

[hawksightsarc]

@shiroi---kumo gave Riza an offer:

He's poking his head in to the room hoping he would find her and after popping into many of them throughout the space of the Comodeen, finally does the white prince find the Amestrian in question.

"Miss Riza." His voice calls out to her with in soft tone, hoping he wouldn't spook her by showing up so suddenly.

"I heard a rumor that you were wanting to learn how to dance and while it is not human dances, I have extensive knowledge of my people's dances. I can show you a few of them if you'd like."

Being trapped indoors did little to improve her mood. Birds were not meant to be trapped like this, she believed. One of the benefits of being the Colonel's bodyguard was his preference for field work, which meant less time spent at desks shuffling papers. Here, though, he needed to stay put in the safety of the Comodeen, and that meant she could not stray far. She took her job seriously. Not only that, but someone needed to make sure he actually stayed put.

But, that didn't mean she had to stay in her room, nor did she have to wear her full uniform at all times. The jacket stayed behind---it was stifling most days, especially here where it wasn't really needed. It made her stick out like a sore thumb while she did simple things like have a cup of tea or practice on the shooting range. There had to be something else for her to do. Books to read, maybe? She couldn't read Wonderland's language, though...

Or, other hobbies. She could sew like the Colonel did. Cook for the Comodeen. Listen to music. Did they have music here? Was it anything like the swing she heard on the radio from time to time? Father didn't have a radio at the estate, so having a radio of her own at home... that was a welcome change. Just another perk of freedom.

It felt silly, but she wished she could dance to it like the Colonel and his sisters.

White Cloud had a quieter approach than most. Still, Riza's ears perked up when she heard him, and her eyes found him instantly when he spoke. He had a soft voice, unobtrusive and gentle like a breeze on a summer afternoon. Maybe they could have some tea together again and chat. Or, she could show him the blanket Fuery made for her.

Would asking him to take her out of this place for just a little while be too much to ask? Probably.

His statement turned her cheeks pink. Had she spoken too loudly to the Colonel the other day about that? It was just a musing of hers, something she hadn't thought anyone would care about. The Colonel couldn't teach her---not when they had images to upkeep---and they were far from any dance schools in Amestris. Well, White Cloud did have excellent hearing. He was being so kind in offering while she stood in front of him blushing.

"Umm." For goodness' sake, she forgot herself. She cleared her throat to try and regain some composure. "I didn't know you heard that. But... if you really wouldn't mind... I would really like that. Me not being able to fly wouldn't be too much of a hindrance, would it?"

[loyaltyforged]

( @shiroi---kumo ) "getting there is one thing, it's getting back that's the problem."

@shiroi---kumo

Waking up in a strange place without the barest hint of familiar terrain had not been even remotely part of the plan for the day. One minute she had been traveling with the young prince, taking care of affairs back home after the Promised Day, and the next she felt herself being drawn in by a mysterious force, a pull she could not resist.

The bodyguard was observant, fast enough in her reflexes and sharp enough in her senses that she caught just a glimpse of it — a massive pillar descending from somewhere far beyond their atmosphere and into the Earth below, an eerie aura surrounding it. It was from beyond the mortal world, that much she deduced, particularly after finding herself hurtling through the air when she had once been firmly on the ground. A forest is what she fell into, catching branches in the canopy on her way down, slowing her descent a fraction, but not enough. Lan Fan had hit the ground hard, the grass and other foliage not providing enough cushion, and she had fallen unconscious.

Without an indication of time, she wasn't sure how long she had been out when she did finally wake up, her body aching and her automail arm damaged, but not beyond repair. How panicked she had been when the throbbing in her head subsided enough for her to realize that Ling was not with her. She was supposed to protect him and, as it stands, his whereabouts are unknown to her. Without the Dragon's Pulse to aid her, there wasn't much Lan Fan could tell about this place, what kind of people resided here or... even where she was. The most she could do is start off in a direction, eyes and ears peeled, searching for any semblance of a sign that the prince had come with her.

It was then that she ran into this person, stark white in appearance, a contrast to the dark colors of her guard uniform, someone who seemed more familiar with this world than her. Obviously, the first inquiry she had was about just where she is, what she's doing here, and how she can get back... but their answer was less than comforting.

"What... do you mean to say? That I'm stuck here?" She swallows hard, her voice beginning to rise in octave as panic truly sets in. "What about the prince?! It's my duty to protect him, I made a vow — I can't stay! Please... tell me that I can return to my country...!"

[firsthcmunculus]

@shiroi---kumo || from Here

"i am so very sorry. it was an accident."

Whatever was thrown hit Selim right on the head. It stirred up his will to kill so much, it took him a second to regain his control. He turned around and smiled.

"No worries! It was an accident."

[blindfoldcd]

@shiroi---kumo asked: for whoever you decide to throw at the prince || “If you’re afraid of falling, then don’t look down.”

imagine dragons - evolve album | meme

Heights don't frighten her (they never have), but if there's one thing she hates, it's being carried – by a STRANGER, no less. The interdimensional traveler doesn't remember exactly what transpired beforehand, between arriving here and suddenly waking up in the one of the most uncomfortable situations not even her mind could dream up. Miya recalls meeting him, though she's not sure why they're flying through the air nor where they're going. This world is still FOREIGN to her and, aside from being told her ill-given abilities won't free her from it, there isn't much she knows yet. What do these wonderland dwellers do to those unfortunate enough to end up trapped here? Do they simply carry on and continue live in this chaotic place after being displaced from their own worlds? Is it even POSSIBLE to return home?

All valid questions she desperately needs answers to, among several others that aren't weighing quite as heavily 'pon her mind – those are merely curiosities she wishes to sate. Miya casts a glance at the world far beneath the sky, trying to ignore the UNBEARABLY awkward sensation of being held against her will. Struggling out of his hold would only prove to send her tumbling through the air, towards the ground, and that's not a landing she surmises she could make.

Swallowing thickly, she wonders if this one would answer her long string of questions. ❝ So... you called this place 'wonderland'... What does that mean or, rather, where are you taking me? ❞

[zoragrace]

@shiroi---kumo has entered. "I don't judge people on their worst mistakes."

a sentence meme I lost. LKJFK;LDSALKJFA

"I tend to not do that either," If anything, Mipha's criticality towards unachieved goals and missteps extended only towards specific people, her in particular. How could someone so kindhearted be so insistently cruel with themselves? (Perhaps it was a byproduct of being an heir.) "I just wish I could extend the same kindness to myself."

[galeleads]

@shiroi---kumo has entered. "Do you miss them when they're away?"

"All the time."

She wants to say, 'that's quite a personal question', but there's no point. Any semblance of normalcy is shredded away due to her exhaustion mentally and physically. Thank god she managed to get her sister to bed before they all spoke to one another. "Mar will swear up, and down I'm the most unreasonable person she knows. That I'm overprotective and too attached."

"Maybe I am. Maybe it makes me a terrible guardian sometimes, but I'd do anything for her. She's dealt with enough."

"You see when we were younger... we almost lost her to a terrible accident."

An indicator of the future laid forth in front of her; carnage and tears only kept together by her nerves of steel. Unrelenting. Who but a child of merely thirteen witnesses such a sight, let alone aid in the search and rescue? "I was the one who carried her out it all. The adults weren't small enough to reach her; when I did get to her, she gripped onto me for dear life and didn't let go." That feeling of small hands refusing to peel themselves from her, then the traces of iron-scented crimson that left indentations upon her in the form of hand prints. It's all burned into her skin and her mind. She can almost feel it now. But Mar's touch is only small shadows in the figments of her imagination, so Aurora shakes her head to forget.

"So, when I miss her, my veins feel like ice; I promised her that day that nothing would happen. I'd fix her up and send her back into the world; but she's a shooting star, as if she knows better than me." A pause, "My fears can be all-consuming, I get that; that is why I do what I do. If I can guarantee a life for her and Amelia, then that's all I need. I'd die for that gladly."

She peers up, emerald and jade meeting one another, along with some rather horrified faces from the others. (Though White Cloud's are all she can focus on.) Perhaps she's spoken too much this time. "Don't look at me like that," She mutters, "I don't need anyone's pity."

[theyoungprinceling]

✏ for Kumo! || @shiroi---kumo

[Here is your puff ball. He was a stubborn one for a little while there lol. I hope I got his sword right. The reference I used for it was being held the opposite way, so I might've messed up somewhere. I also went back and forth on whether I wanted to add his mask or not but decided not to. It looks better this way. Anyway, I hope you like it!

@muses-of-kira / @shiroi---kumo

Send ✏ and I will draw your muse |Accepting|]

[flameleadsarc]

White Cloud already took care of food and water. Well, that was good. Besides, maybe it was better he didn't cook for Fuery when he was still a novice and this wasn't his kitchen. What else could he do? A blanket? Yes, he offered to get that. The Comodeen had to have more spares. He could ask---

Or, he realized, as a pair of sad eyes bore into him, he could just stay and listen. Just because he was used to fixing everything or jumping into action did not mean he had to. Thus, he forced himself to sit still, a challenge in and of itself as he laced his fingers together in his lap. No fidgeting. He could maintain focus without needing something to do with his hands. Surely.

Fuery did want something from him judging by that stare, but he... there was a barrier. A few barriers, some Roy set up himself due to his position. They couldn't be friends. They were professionals. That was the boundary he established with the Lieutenant and Hughes. The former held to it while the latter never gave a shit and called him by his first name at every chance he had.

And what he wouldn't give to hear it just one more time.

When talking to White Cloud, he told them they weren't soldiers here. Rank didn't matter. Maybe... maybe he needed to act on that, and he needed to start here. The boundary he and the Lieutenant had existed for a slew of other reasons, but, with Fuery... he could do better. Be better. As Edward would say, he didn't need to be Colonely here. Just be Roy Mustang... whoever the fuck that was.

Two things, he started. He wanted two things. Roy tried not to sit on the edge of his seat, tried not to seem too eager to show that, if it would make those sad eyes gain just a glimmer of their former happiness, then he would move heaven and earth. Two things. What could he do? What did Kain Fuery want from him?

To never go back to those trenches. That was one. And the other... for him to drop the façade. Well then... it seemed he wanted what White Cloud told Roy to do in the first place. Slowly, Roy nodded his head.

"You will never see the trenches again. I won't allow it. I would rather put myself in that position than see you have to go through something so abhorrent again. I'm sorry I threw that at you first thing too when I came in. I guess I was hoping they weren't going to do that, and you were going to get a desk job, but---no, no excuses." He shook his head to himself. "You deserve better from me."

Pausing, he let out a sigh. "As for your second request... I'll do my best to act less like a Colonel, but I'm not promising instant change. I'm giving you free reign to tell me if I'm acting like an asshole. The Lieutenant has that right, so you should have it too. You, the Lieutenant, Breda, Havoc, and Falman should all have that right."

She erred this time. She knew this tactic by now, the, "we need to talk privately" tactic one deployed when another person was present. The Colonel used it in various ways over the years, and, when she missed that cue, he explained it. Cid wanted to talk to her alone out of White Cloud's earshot---wouldn't that be difficult, though, considering his hearing? Either way, he wanted to talk about something that he didn't want White Cloud knowing about.

And she couldn't say she liked that.

White Cloud either knew what Cid was getting at, and he played along, or he truly was oblivious. Something told the Lieutenant it was the former. Once he left, her attention went on Cid. As predicted, he lost his smile, which meant this wasn't going to be a happy conversation.

No, no happiness could be found here. She needed to be more like the Colonel in her conversations: use finesse in favor of bluntness, less directness when the subjects were heavier. He danced around heavy subjects to avoid the pain they brought---Ishval, Hughes, the Elrics' taboo---and handled them with far more grace than she knew how. That was always the way of things, though, since he was her father's apprentice. She just needed to be more like him---her father's true heir---in every way she could.

"Understood." In this case, caution was fine and necessary. Riza knew she could be more cautious for someone she considered a friend. Now that she knew this was a heavy topic, she could avoid it. "I'll be more careful in the future. However, I do have to ask if this information is something you want to be kept between the two of us. I report to Colonel Mustang, and he will report to Brigadier General Leota. If you want me to keep this information confidential, I will."

Considering there was one other factor: how the Colonel would react to it. He could make decisions for himself, yes, but her job was to ensure he didn't do anything reckless. Going out searching Wonderland because he didn't want his sons even chancing a meeting with Gaudium's followers would fit that description. Never mind the monsters. He'd have his gloves on and be out the door faster than anyone in the building could blink.

"How can we help with the search? These are our people, so we are responsible for them. The fact that Fuery is here means there is probably more than one pillar in Amestris, so we have to work with that knowledge."

|| shiroi---kumo -> flameleads -> @justaradioguy

Mustang says he won't make him, says he'll fight for him, says he's allowed to be angry.

He's not certain if he believes all of it, and the colonel isn't addressing the main point, but it's certainly better than anything he's received before.

It's not what he'd been expecting for laying his emotions out in the open. That's never gone well.

"Get out. Get out and do not come back. This isn't your home anymore."

"Fine. I won't. I'm fine on my own and this wasn't home to begin with."

Kain's sure that whatever Mustang is doing now is as close as he'll ever get to being welcomed home after a long day. It's not opening the door to the smell of something baking, it's not having warm arms wrapped around him, it's not laughter at some small unimportant thing like how much dirt's in his boots, it's not having an animal run up to greet him, it's not warm lighting that feels cozy enough to relax in - it's not what he wants or what he imagines a home would feel like but it is a little relieving. It is the closest thing to home that he's ever had.

It's enough to let him loosely deceive himself again, and he feels a wave of self-loathing for daring to want anything more. He tries to reconcile this interaction and his feelings, and it doesn't fit neatly. Nothing ever does.

Why is he reaching out to accept an offer when he's not worth helping? He's been just fine drowning all this time, so why not now?

"... White Cloud gave me food and water."

He doesn't specify that trail mix is the food in question nor that he's not had an actual meal in so long he can't even remember what or when the meal was.

He's not sure if he can hold himself upright to eat one, anyway. He is pretty sure that Roy asking if he'd like something doesn't include most of the things he wants to ask for, though.

So, Kain does what he usually does. He stares at Roy with big, sad eyes to look for any trace of love since he knows the words 'I love you' aren't ones he's ever going to hear at this rate. His existence will simply be like this, as it always has - scraping up crumbs whenever he can just to shape them together and convince himself that he has a reason to live.

And, like it usually does, the scraping together works just enough to let him see another day.

Maybe he's not enough. Maybe Roy does not consider him a friend or even a part of his family.

And maybe he can learn to be okay with that, because if nothing else the Colonel is at least an ally, and that's infinitely more than he had been expecting going into his rant.

He decides on what he wants right now, finally.

"Two things," he says. "I just want two things. I want-"

It feels like he's choking.

These words - 'I want' - feel forbidden, but he forces them out anyway past the invisible barrier in his throat.

"I want to never go back to those trenches again, and I want to know if you'll drop the stupid façade for a while. Just... five minutes, even."

He wants to talk to someone real, someone genuine, an equal.

He wants so badly to just talk to an equal, someone who understands and doesn't just sit there coldly like he's planning his words out to manipulate in just the right way, putting out artificial warmth that does nothing in the long run and leads to this. Kain's light is dim, flickering - really, all that's left is a stray ember or two and he is depending heavily on an actual flame to light it again.

Space heaters don't create campfires.

|| @shiroi---kumo -> flameleads -> justaradioguy

[mielmoto]

@shiroi---kumo

❝ ―oh, you have to meet my girls! I owe them for, like, 50% of my wardrobe. sometimes I sketch out the original design, other times I just describe, like, the vibe of what I'm looking for, and they ALWAYS deliver! ❞

this isn't to say that Honey can't, or doesn't, find pretty little things off the rack, but with such extravagant and particular tastes, is it any surprise that most of her ensembles are custom? ❝ but, of course, that sort of thing takes time; in the meanwhile, you should raid my closet! we can cinch things in as needed, ❞ they didn't exactly have the most similar figures, after all... but that would be a simpler than simple enchantment to fix, as well. ❝ and I have EVERY color of petticoat or underskirt under the sun, so don't worry on that front! ❞