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maliciouslycreative · 5 years ago

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So I’ve mentioned a lot of times over the years that I used to be fandom famous in a small anime fandom and I spent a lot of my time running damage control to an anti however I’ve never actually recounted the whole tale for you all. Buckle up and crack open a lemonade because we’re going on a journey (more under the cut).

The year is 2004, I’m 17, and in my final year of high school. I wrote a lot of fanfic back then, mostly for anime fandoms and around the time I joined Gaia I started posting my fanfic “Several Blows to the Head” which became unexpectedly extremely popular. But before I go forward I feel I should give some back story because some of you will probably get extremely confused very fast otherwise.

For those of you who don’t know about gaia online let me give you some history. Gaia was pretty much THE SHIT back in the mid to late 2000s. It was an anime themed forum website where you had a little avatar you could dress up.You gained gold by posting, playing mini games, posting in polls, or even just browsing in general. There were hundreds of subforums and in each of them a tonne of active threads. Another feature was the guild system. Basically anyone could create a guild which was pretty much your own themed subforum that the guild admin could decide the rules and who was able to join as long as they still followed Gaia’s ToS.

The anime I was into was (Bakuten Shoot) Beyblade, which at the time was an ongoing series. For those unfamiliar with the series a bunch of teenagers use battling tops possessed with the spirits of ancient mythological creatures and even gods to fight each other. Let’s just say it wasn’t winning any awards for amazing writing but it was a lot of fun and I LOVED my small corner of the fandom. It was pretty much your average shonen series of the time which meant that it had a main cast of 5 male characters (with a female lead added in the second season) and then very few minor female characters. The only actual canon ship was only made canon in a post canon addition to the manga that was not even released outside of Japan. So I bet you all are coming to the same conclusion that yes, there was incredibly bad shipping drama. The breakdown of shipping pretty much looked like this

10% slash

70% canon male/OC

20% canon male/canon female

Now to resume our story. I joined Gaia and headed over to the anime forum and found the main Beyblade thread. I posted an introduction and in it made mention that I was a fanfic writer and I liked slash. This was when I met C. I’m not going to drag her name as all of this went down over a decade ago and I hope that she’s grown as a person since then. If any of you are REALLY resourceful I mean the threads still exist. You can go find them and see just how awful it got.

C was a year older than me and apparently the authority in these parts on all things Beyblade. She was also a writer but in her own words did not write fanfics, she wrote and posted novels. She was pretty well known in the canon/OC circles and had a pretty enthusiastic following.

So when I came in to that thread and introduced myself I opened a can of worms. I was told that we did not discuss slash ships in this thread because it was not canon and it made some people uncomfortable. And ok, I can see that. It was cool. I was there to have fun and chat with people. I mean anyone that wanted to chat slash I could add on YIM, MSN, or LJ. However, 2 things started driving the knife into the wound.

It was not ok to talk slash but it was perfectly ok for C to discuss in depth her fanfics because it was an OC and obviously did not contradict canon as the stories were post (a currently unfinished) canon

People kept recognising me because my fanfic was exploding in popularity. So people kept bringing up slash and I’d get dragged into it as my fic was usually a catalyst for discussion.

To keep things from escalating us slash fans decided to make our own thread to talk Beyblade slash. Now, there was some divide in the slash fandom and people pretty much shipped only Kai/Takao or Kai/Rei but for the sake of everyone’s sanity we put our shipping differences aside in the thread and aimed to make it a positive space for everyone. I mean, most of us were multishippers so we tended to just be excited to read anything that wasn’t one of the 9000 OC fics we had to wade through to find any slash.

Whenever people would come into the main Beyblade thread now if they happened to mention slash they would get an extremely cold message from C if one of us didn’t manage to intervene first and direct the new member to our other thread.

The other crux of the problem was Kai. Kai was probably the most popular character in the English fandom and Kai was C’s favourite character. She had an extremely specific idea of how people should interpret Kai. If anyone came into the thread and made a post like “I LOVE KAI <3 <3 <3” she would be rather unkind to them making back handed comments about how the person only liked him because he was attractive or a “bad boy” or that if they didn’t have anything to add to the thread they should leave because we didn’t like spamming in the thread. If we ever started character analysis on Kai then C had to have the last word. After all she shared some characteristics with Kai and obviously that meant that she therefore knew him the best.

You all can probably imagine how well conversations went in this thread. I did my best to kindly welcome people to the thread, redirect them when they needed to be, and tried to calm down discussions when they got too heated. And if things got too bad in the main thread we’d just move to the slash thread and be super excellent to each other. There were days where C became so unbearable that her friends that didn’t even ship slash would come into the slash thread to hang with us because we were just really nice.

She was also extremely pushy with her fics. Whenever fanfics would come up shed be the first to suggest to anyone that they should read her novels. She even tried it repeatedly on the slash fans. Being completely fed up I one day made her an offer that if she read one of my fics I’d read all of hers. I didn’t even specify which fic. So she could’ve chosen one of my under 5k fics and I would have agreed to read like 200k worth of her fics. She never agreed to this in all the years of me dealing with her.

The worst part of it all was we couldn’t even really report her for harassment or anything because she was friends with a lot of moderators. The last thing any of us wanted was to get banned over some petty grievance since we’d lose all our hard work to making our avatars look fabulous.

If the whole mess in the forums wasn’t bad enough there was 1 Beyblade guild and guess who the guild admin was. The atmosphere in said guild could best be described as… tense. Anyone that wasn’t one of C’s rabid followers ran under the constant fear that they’d be booted for saying something that didn’t agree with her narrow view of things. My best friend and I were honestly surprised that she even allowed us into the guild. But she probably couldn’t afford to outright deny us as I was a pretty prominent writer in the english slash community then and my friend was also a prominent writer and artist.

Eventually we got tired of walking on eggshells constantly so some of the other slash fans and myself pooled our resources together and I created a second Beyblade guild. Our message was simple, we were just there to be a safe haven for ALL fans of the series. We were expecting pretty much the people from the slash thread and then maybe a handful of other people to join.

The entire fandom on Gaia over the course of a couple days abandoned C’s guild and joined ours. Whereas before we created ours hers was on a steady traffic decline our guild was BOOMING with posts.

Unfortunately the oldest mail I have is from 2007 on Gaia so I don’t have any screenshots of this but C was understandably upset that we’d sniped her entire user base. We did try to smooth it over with her saying that that was never our intention but it ended with her sending me a message that literally said “ok, you win” and this is something I still think about over a decade later. It forever shifted how I perceive antis.

My whole time in fandom I’d just been here trying to have a good time. I didn’t intend to become fandom famous. I didn’t intend to be in charge of one of the most active Beyblade forums at the time. I wasn’t trying to change C’s mind or fight her. And this whole time she’d thought I’d been fighting against her because we had different views on the series.

The last episode of Beyblade G Revolution aired in September 2005, her guild officially closed in 2006 and the fandom eventually started drifting into other things. I stayed active in it until probably 2008 when personal stuff drew me out of fandom and then officially took a leave from fandom in 2009 when my best friend passed away. I don’t know what happened to C but I know she was still writing her novels at that point. Whenever I see fandom drama brewing I always think back to her and how frustrated she used to make me and then I think of the “ok, you win” and I’m just left feeling sad for her and people like her. I just don’t understand how people can let their hearts be so consumed by hatred and self righteousness that it poisons their entire fandom experience. I guess that’s a conversation for another time.

One final comment that I would like to make here since I didn’t know where to fit it in above is that my one friend was completely DONE with C one day and we were talking to each other and she was like “she acts like her fics save lives in Africa!” and honestly this is the most perfect description of C’s attitude. Like good for her for believing in her writing but there is sometimes a point where you need to chill out with self promotion.

#fandom drama #long post #man i kind of wish i had screenshots of stuff that went down #because it was absolutely wild #and this is why i don't get involved in fandom drama any more #like this shit made me eternally tired #also y'all are welcome to rebagel this and tell your own tales #malicious musings

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lhs3020b · 5 years ago

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Boris And the Baddest of Bad Weeks

I promised an expanded entry on what’s going on at the moment in our national meltdown, so here it is...

Allow me, if I may, to walk back an earlier comment of mine. Some time ago, I was distinctly skeptical about the idea of an early general election. However, the situation has evolved. You see, there was one thing I didn't count on. I never imagined that Boris Johnson would be stupid enough to force nearly two dozen of his MPs out of his party.

That's right: I over-estimated his intelligence. Umm, whoops.

In my defence, what he did may well have been the single most utterly-stupidly self-defeating maneuver ever in British politics. The only sense I can make from it is that he's having a narcisistic breakdown. Actually, viewed in that very narrow light, perhaps it does make a little sense. If you've ever had the misfortune to have a narcissist in your life, you'll be aware that the thing they just can't cope with is any sort of rejection. The "no"-word tends to summon a meltdown - and of course BoJo faced a pretty major series of "nopes" from Parliament this week.

The other thing I didn't count on was that apparently yes, there actually are some things that some Tory MPs just won't do, even if the consequences of Not Doing The Thing runs to damaging their personal careers. This did come as a surprise to me - I'd assumed that blind partisanship and the desire for salaries would ultimately trump - or perhaps, Trump - all other concerns. But no, credit where it's due, it turns out that for at least 21 of them, there was a floor on the greed after all. Admittedly it's taken us three years of accelerating chaos to find it, but it was there.

The next factor that I didn't count on was that the opposition parties got their act together. Bluntly, there was no hint of this over the summer. The speed with which it happened has left me a little dazed. The earlier failure to call a Vote of No Confidence, the weird shenanigens over ludicrous Governments-of-National-Unity, the generalised infighting and chronic myopia ... just two weeks ago, it was not looking good. I was basically starting to quietly accept that we on the pro-Remain side were finally defeated, and worst of all, we'd been defeated mainly by our own allies.

Then the prorogue happened.

It's fair to say that it's already backfired. The obvious cynicism of the strategy, the naked contempt for all the institutions of British government, the sheer gall of it all - it was meant to energise the pro-Brexit crowd. Instead, it appears to have driven everyone on the soft-Brexit/pro-Remain aisle into a state of thermonuclear rage. And if there's one thing that can bring unlikely allies together, it's a common enemy. By pursuing his grandiose "oh look at me being so Brexity!" cock-strutting routine, Boris accidentally made himself into exactly that enemy.

The other factor was that the prorogue has imposed a sharp time-limit. Consequently, Continuity!Remain just doesn't have the luxury of descending into factional infighting. The deep irony is that putting us on a tight deadline has actually helped us. It's imposed a focus that just wasn't there even 10 days ago.

Meanwhile, as for the wider country, well, Boris's walk-about up north yesterday seems to have been a complete disaster. Random people were basically coming up to him to tell him that it had all gone wrong. Then there was that bizarre speech he gave in front of a captive audience of police recruits. It was just weird - proper delusion territory, and entirely-incoherent. I'd like to compare it to Trump, but at least Trump can manage a consistent theme. Johnson was just rambling. There was nothing there, except possibly a desperate plea for attention. A lot of the political journalists I follow are openly-speculating about whether BoJo was on drugs during the speech.

(And wouldn't that be the ultimate post-2016 banter-timeline twist? If the Prime Minister - the Prime Minister! - got busted for snorting crack?)

Meanwhile, BoJo's narc-meltdown has accidentally undone Theresa May's one significant achievement.

Contrary to what many people think, Theresa May did manage to thread one single needle. That was, she (mostly) managed to keep the parliamentary Conservative Party together. Granted a few MPs jumped ship to Change UK earlier in the year, but it stayed in single digits. There was no big split - and, significantly, the Change UK crowd got wet feet about no-confidencing her. The advantage of this was that Theresa May avoided having the Tories fall into what we might call the 1922 Trap. Here's what I mean by that: in the late 19th Century, the old Liberal Party was increasingly-split on the issue of Home Rule for Ireland. The tensions only got worse as time went on. Then Asquith went and delivered the First World War and precious little else of value. (He was notably-slimey on votes for women, and seemed uninterested in doing anything about the property qualification that 40% of men still faced. The cynic might note that Nick Clegg's behaviour is not entirely new.) Lloyd George tried to put the party back on its feet, but the damage was done. During the 1920s, the Liberals were openly-split. At elections, Liberals ran against each other in numerous constituencies. Because of the way first-past-the-post voting works, in practise this meant that Tories or Labour got elected instead. (A constituency has - say - 46% of the vote for any Liberal candidate, but two run. Each of them gets 23% of the vote. A.N. Other Party takes 24% and gets the MP's seat.)

Theresa May's political strategy - yes, she actually did have one - was predicated on avoiding having Tories run against other Tories at elections. Given their divisions, it was a narrow needle, but she mostly managed to thread it. Boris Johnson has gone and exploded that. You see, of the 21 MPs he's sacked from the party, several are saying they'll contest the next election as independents.

It's hard to know just how big a problem the 1922 Trap will be - but, their vote is already split with the Brexit Party. And even the most optimistic opinion polls have the Tories around 10pts down on where they were in 2017. They're already in minority in the House - how many votes can they afford to lose, really?

Meanwhile, there's a further problem. The Tories' drift to the political right may have taken them too far. They assume that their friends at the Times, the Sun, the Telegraph and the BBC can plaster over the cracks for them - but, can they? The media was full-throated for May in 2017, and she still lost her majority. The newspapers are hysterical and shriekier than ever - but, who reads them? I can't remember the last time I bought a physical copy of one of the main papers. I suspect that's true of many other people too. There are signs that the socially-liberal/financially-conservative chunk of voters are starting to decamp to the Lib Dems. Again, it's not clear how big this movement is - but, as I said earlier, how many votes can the Tories afford to lose? It's possible that they could be facing the nightmare scenario of a general election where the right-wing vote is split three ways (four, if you count UKIP's still-slightly-tembling corpse, though they're close to a rounding error now). If the next election was still certain to be in 2022, all this would be somewhat academic. Two and a half years is a long time, they could find a way to turn things around. All things being equal, I expect they would.

But then BoJo had his narc meltdown, didn't he?

The so-called government is now in absolute minority in the House. While their opponents can't currently agree on an alternative prime minister, nonetheless the anti-BoJo grouping now has a majority of 43. They can stop him doing anything. No legislation is going to go through this house. Finance bills are basically dead on arrival. I really can't see how he could pass any kind of Budget. And also, if he does anything at all to irritate the Opposition, they can no-confidence him any time they feel like it. Quite simply, he's on death row.

My guess is that they'll leave him be during the prorogue period. The logic here is obvious enough - let him twist in the wind. He's doing a great job of destroying himself, so let him get on with it. This way, when Parliament returns late in October, they can do the deed and it will look like a mercy-killing rather than a gang-land execution.

Hypothetically, there are four ways Boris could get off the hook:

1) He could resign. This would arguably save him some dignity, and just perhaps it might leave a little room to revive his future career. But, he won’t take this option. He’s a narc. They don’t voluntarily quit. (Plus, uh, much as I’d cackle if he was forced to quit, it just leaves his successor with the same set of problems that he failed to address.)

2) He could try to simply ignore the anti-hard Brexit law. The problem here is, it would give the opposition a prima facie grounds for an immediate Motion of No Confidence. He might get some love from the rightwing press, but the ultimate result would presumably be his removal and a new Prime Minister. It would be the most pointless constitutional crisis ever.

3) He could arrange to lose a motion of no confidence in his own government. This would arguably be constitutional, and might be a way to trigger an early election. But, it would a) look utterly-absurd, b) be an unprecedented thing to do and c) would also require him personally to face the House telling him to fuck off. I’m not sure that a narc is capable of that. Also, there’s the issue that, as we saw in 2017, there’s no guarantee that he could win a general election. I’m absolutely not sanguine about the risks of an early GE but a) that’s democracy and b) if he runs his campaign the way he’s running being PM then he could well end up roasted.

4) He could reverse the prorogue. On the one hand, un-proroguing Parliament would buy him some extra legislative time. On the other hand, his opponents have control of the House, and a wobble on the prorogue would make him look weak. There’s not much upside for him here, though it’s the most “conventional” of the four options.

Basically the TL;DR is that while he has some choices, none of them are good and all of them could cause him considerable personal pain. The opposition have set up a proper four-pronged Morton’s Fork for him. Which tine will he impale himself on?

As for Brexit? Well, one interesting detail is that the underlying political question seems to be open again. It hasn't quite gained mainstream traction yet, but apparently people are starting to ask whether Brexit is going to happen at all. The Labour Party's position has moved visibly toward hard-Remain, albeit grudgingly. The Lib Dems are having their time in the sun again (though, I suspect that glomming up Philip Lee may help them less than they seem to hope). I don't know that I think it's going to happen, but I can now imagine a situation where at the end of October, the anti-BoJo constellation No-Confidences him then pushes a quick revocation bill through Parliament. (The "party line" here would be, "We wanted a second referendum but this man's scheming hasn't left us enough time.") Again, not saying this is at all likely, but I think it is now a possible outcome.

And if nothing else, BoJo's supposed golden hour is turning out to be quite the nightmarish turkey - and isn't that just delicious?

#diary of a disaster #UK internal politics #Boris's bad bad no good week #hahahahaha

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jewell-chan · 7 years ago

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Top 16 Shuichi Saihara ships

Another Amino copy/paste and this probably be extremely controversial, but let’s give it a go posting it. This is my Top 16 Saihara ships, including crossover ships as an entry. And yes, this is my quick opinion and I know there will be controversial choices but I do explain my points and I am aware which choices are controversial and why. Major spoilers under the cut:

Art source: https://www.pixiv.net/member_illust.php?mode=medium&illust_id=62325101

Hiyo, and finally, I’ll be actually listening to my poll results. And here, I’ll be going back to discussing two things that set this fandom on fire: Shipping and opinions. Yes, I know, the horror.

If you hadn’t guessed from the title, this will be ranking the ship of Shuichi Saihara, the Super High School Level Detective. It’s 16 because Saihara is pretty much shipped with the entire cast and more.

We’ll have NDRV3 spoilers from here on out since Saihara is a major character in the game so plot and character details will be discussed. Also, I’m unsure but I’ll add the warning anyway: This list may contain the mentions of adult themes and a bit of foul language. Since the title is so straightforward, I don’t really need to explain much with this OP so let’s begin.

16.Saiharu

Let’s start with one of my least favorite ships in the series. Also known as Harusai and Saikawa, Saiharu is a really poor ship in my opinion. Pandora hearts spoilers but, for those who read it, do you remember when Sharon and Reim randomly got married at the end for no reason other than both of them being Break’s friends? That’s how this ship feels to me. Except worse.

First off, Saihara and Maki’s personalities are way too serious so despite the many interactions they have, specifically in Chapter 3, they never find any particular dynamic making their chemistry seem weak as well and almost non-existent. The only, and I do mean the only, good exchange between the two is in Chapter 3 when Maki gets mad at Saihara for the implication she’s overweight and claiming the only woman Saihara has ever touched was his mother.

So that alone makes me feel neutral, leaning towards dislike, on the ship. Their chemistry being bland as fuck. However, that’s not what seals the deal. What does that for me is in Chapter 5, Maki tells Saihara and the others that she will not go into the hanger and attack Ouma and the group decide to believe her. What does she do? Go into the hanger and attack Ouma. When the group finds out about this, they have no reaction, Saihara included. When Maki thinks she’s the killer, she tries to sacrifice everyone, Saihara included, just to make sure Ouma’s dead. She put her personal bias against Ouma over the lives of Yumeno, Kiibo and Saihara who she knew were innocent.

Normally, I’d think this would be interesting. Relationships with conflict are actually well done. However, they don’t do anything with this. They do show concern for Maki’s attempt to kill everybody but it’s glossed over too quickly to notice. After the trial, Maki talks to Saihara about Kaito and it’s supposed to be a heartfelt scene between the two but at best, it feels plastic. At worst, it feels manipulative. I can’t believe this conversation after she tried to get him and the others killed and it’s not actually brought up past this point.

My final reason is why I hate this ship is because it feels the only appeal it has is because Kaito is dead so why don’t his two best friends hook up? I hated it when Pandora hearts did it in canon(keep in mind that Pandora Hearts is my favorite series of all time) and I hate the idea of it here. Thankfully, Japan agrees with me and dislikes the ship strongly with very few fans so making them canon wouldn’t help sales very much.

15.Saiguuji

Thankfully, Saiharu is the only Saihara ship I dislike. Let’s get to this weird ship. It’s fairly popular on twitter for some odd reason and while it’s fanbase is small outside of that, it’s few fans are incredibly vocal. I am fairly neutral on this ship.

This one is really personal taste, however. I just find it weird. I understand why it’s shipped but the fanbase’s treatment of it makes it sound like a tragic and canon love story gone wrong.

Like, if you want my perception of this ship, try looking at Korekiyo’s love hotel. That is how I see this pairing. So looking at the fanbase compared to things like that, I just… Ehh?

However, the incredibly bizarre fanbase aside, I actually do enjoy the dynamic between these two in Korekiyo’s FTEs. This is where I find the major appeal of the ship and definitely my favorite part of it. Korekiyo talking about anthropology and folklore tales to Saihara who’s patiently listening is actually very nice. I can see where people are coming from when they ship this. Even Korekiyo says he finds Saihara worthy for his sister.

Another thing to bring up why I can’t really grow to like this ship is because of their main story. Not only does Saihara expose Korekiyo as the killer, Korekiyo being rather pissed off about it, but Saihara finds Korekiyo absolutely disgusting in terms of his motive, even to the point of being relieved he dies. What also doesn’t help is he says “I will never understand you…” if you check his door after his demise which is probably one of the harsher comments protagonists give out we’ve had so far. Understandably so. So yeah, it’s not exactly a healthy ship and I personally have no care for it but eh, I see the appeal.

14.Saimugi

Another ship I am neutral on but can see the appeal for. This is really the ideal ship for those who like psychologically abusive villain X protagonist ships. I have seen some fans for it who pretty much enjoy it for the reasons I would assume they would.

Mugi seems like everyone’s friend for most of the game, Saihara included, and the two also have some optional scenes together. There’s also that scene when exploring for lab where she talks to Saihara more about her life outside of cosplaying.

However, in the final chapter of the game, you find out their friendship was a lie and Mugi was just a role for her to play inside of the script. While they weren’t close or anything, you could still feel they were friends. So not only is it heartbreaking for Saihara, but the final trial nails in Saihara’s suffering all caused by her. Having her be Amami’s true murderer, exposing his whole life being a lie, showing his audition tape of who he once was and all gloating about it as Saihara falls to a despairing state. It’s quite hard to watch and definitely impactful.

There’s also her Salmon mode ending(I stopped calling it prison mode since the localization says it this way) where she appoints Saihara into working with her in the cosplay business only for her true self to leak out implying she’s going to do worse things to him than what he expects she will. So with things like that, I can see the appeal of this ship. Although, it isn’t to my taste exactly.

13.Sairumi

Not a very popular ship but I can see the appeal. Although, outside of the goth aesthetic which I like, I am pretty much neutral on this ship. I do admit that Kirumi’s love hotel is my favorite and I actually do like her interactions with Saihara throughout the game. They’re both surface level with each other and get along swimmingly.

However, what lowers this ship for me is Kirumi’s pure salty and petty hatred for him in the second trial. I mean, he does have a nice line towards him after the trial to imply she doesn’t hate him but she was so furious he got her found out as the killer that she’s the only culprit who voted for Saihara out of pure spite.

12.Saihamatsu

Ah yes, the most popular ship in the fandom is only number 12. I’ve made a post going into detail on how I feel about this ship but I guess I’ll briefly repeat myself here. I have neutral feelings towards this ship. There are things I like about it, things that irk me about it and things that make me not care for it.

I do admit that it’s very cute and tragic. While I have my issues with Chapter 1, I actually really like how Kaede’s trial is done and thought her slow manipulation to exposing Saihara was amazing.

I also like certain moments between them in Chapter 1 like when Kaede asks Saihara if he’s looking up her skirt and he apologises, but unlike other anime girls where she’d get all pissy at him, Kaede took it rather maturely and didn’t mind. Another moment is in the investigation where Kaede finds a porno magazine, Saihara wonders why it shocked her so much and she fails to persuade him not to look with her which results in the two incredibly embarrassed. “It’s just Moobies- I mean movies!” got a laugh out of me.

However, my issues with this ship is the same issue I have with the anime Clannad. It’s pretty much “Look at this thing, isn’t it adorable? Oh fuck, now it’s dead. Feel sad” and then you have to angst over how the OTP was destroyed for the rest of the game because the game told you to. They don’t exactly expand on their relationship outside of them being cute and that’s fine, I like simple ships like Momoharu, but this one feels so plastic and forced in a lot of areas. Like when they’re investigating Amami’s corpse, she claims her heart skipped a beat when Saihara touched his corpse. I know it’s because she thinks she’s the killer but blind players are just gonna turn their head questioning why Kaede finds Saihara looking at a dead body hot.

And then there’s Chapter 6 where their relationship takes over and overshadows Mugi’s character a lot which genuinely pisses me off since we don’t get to see much of her true self. Instead of Saihara holding a grudge against Mugi for making everyone suffer throughout the killing game, they have him hold a grudge JUST because she was Amami’s true killer making Kaede falsely executed. Yes, that’s an asshole move but I think writing a script for a killing game and manipulating everyone to death is far worse. It’s like if one guy murdered a man and the other set fire to a school and killed every student inside, and you get mad at the guy who murdered a man.

11.Crossover ships

I don’t usually care for crossover ships outside of talent plan interactions like Mikan X Tenko(I really love this crossover ship due to their talent plan interaction) but I think Saihara has some nice ships in this category.

Ones I enjoy include the obvious Saihara X Kirigiri and the strangely amusing Saihara X Komaeda. Unfortunately, I don’t care much for Saihara’s crackships myself so this is a quick one. Honorable mention goes to Sakura X Saihara because they’re canon(Voice actor joke.)

10.Sairuma

Now this is a strangely popular pairing. I didn’t understand it very much at first since Saihara shows a lot of distaste towards Iruma and her love hotel… Sure was something. However, once I did her FTEs, I could see why this was liked. I wouldn’t exactly consider myself a fan but it sounds nice. Her FTEs actually imply that Iruma may have developed feelings for Saihara in which he accepted said feelings, although not agreed.

Said implication carries onto the third trial in a back route, funny enough. I wasn’t expecting Saihara to be able to tolerate Iruma the way he manages in his FTEs almost to a level where she can pretty much be considered another member to the group of V3 characters fighting for the Saiharabowl alongside Kaito, Kaede, Angie, Ouma, Kiibo and Yumeno. And yes, Iruma is the only one where they actually explain why she gives you her underwear after her FTEs unlike everyone else. What a treat.

9.Amasai

I do like this ship aesthetically and it has some really well done fanart. I’m going to have to replay Amami’s FTEs in order to talk about this more but I’m saving that for my FTEs review post which should come eventually since I finally managed to get my vita copy of the NISA version of the game. That aside, I can safely say that we’re getting into the ships I officially like starting with Amasai. Not saying this is OTP or even BROTP tier but I do genuinely like this ship. The issue is I can’t exactly put my finger on why.

I could say it’s because their personalities work so well with each other, but that’d be too simple of an explanation. I’d say it’s because of Amami’s FTEs and his Salmon mode ending. For those who are unaware, Amami is the Super High School Level Adventurer and upon learning his talent in his FTEs, he tells Saihara about his adventures of travelling across the world. He also explains to Saihara his situation involving his sisters and how he views himself as a terrible brother to let them go missing.

In his salmon mode ending, Amami offers Saihara to travel the world with him and look for his missing sisters together in which Saihara accepts. It’s one of my favorite Salmon mode endings and I found this a very sweet exchange between the two. My only issue with this ship is Amami’s kind of a dick to Saihara in his FTEs whether it’s outright or subtle. I don’t know if that’s just me but he seems a lot nicer with Kaede and a lot douchier with Saihara. Maybe it’s because he’s discussing his missing sisters which is a tough topic to bring up.

8.Saigoku

This is somewhat of a rarepair but it does have it’s more obvious fans and I can see the appeal of this one. Consider it a BROTP of mine actually. Gonta kind of acts like a respectful little brother to Saihara despite obviously being the taller one of the two. Their interactions are very pleasant and Gonta’s FTEs do show this.

What seals the deal for me though is Chapter 4. Unlike the other culprits, Saihara is incredibly firm and gentle with Gonta. Not even Kaede was given that type of exposure. Saihara is aware that Gonta doesn’t even remember murdering Iruma and is taking it easy on him because of that and being as calm and reassuring as he can to him. It’s a way that helps Gonta understand what’s going on, even if he is in tears while establishing so.

I can easily see why Chapter 4 brings tears to so many people and this touch is one of the many reasons. Saihara doesn’t want to believe Gonta is the killer even to the point of suggesting a personality switched, but he can only focus on his goal as a detective to accept that every bit of evidence points to him and the pieces connect the scenario too well. Even after Chapter 4, they try to hammer in Saihara sacrificed Gonta and he definitely feels that way.

7.Saihoshi

This is another BROTP of mine. Throughout Chapter 2, Saihara seemed like the only one who wanted to actively help Ryoma. A strategy I noticed Saihara uses on Angie, Ouma and Ryoma is that he wants to reach out and changed people thinking that’s the right way to go about it. Ouma points out why that’s wrong but I’ll get to that eventually. Here, it actually is the right decision.

Ryoma and Saihara are both able to read the surroundings which results in the two of them able to see eye to eye with each other’s ideals and the two of them refusing to go along with each other’s ideals. Saihara wants to help Ryoma while Ryoma thinks it’s useless. Throughout Ryoma’s FTEs, Saihara keeps bugging Ryoma and asking him to talk about himself to Saihara in order to gain his complete friendship which Ryoma catches onto quite easily.

Ryoma’s final FTE and their last main-story encounter made this BROTP for me. I’ll go in more depth on why Ryoma’s FTEs are so great in his Free time event review but it basically shows that Saihara’s attempts to reach out to Ryoma actually do work and Ryoma becomes willing to give a chance. In the main story, before Ryoma and Saihara get separated ending in Ryoma’s unfortunate demise, Ryoma says that he’s willing to find a reason to live in order to fight alongside everybody and Saihara’s conversations with Ryoma throughout the chapter is a huge motivation to get Ryoma to do so.

6.Saimeno

Now unlike Saiharu, this is actually a GOOD survivor type ship. What a surprise.The reason I like this ship is because Yumeno and Saihara are actually fairly similar in some ways and share a lot of chemistry.

The two of them both like to suppress their emotions, although Yumeno to a higher extent, and became more attached to the people around them as the game goes on. The dojo scene with Tenko shows that the two are similar in this regard.

They also have their differences as shown in the later half of the game. Saihara is more serious and reserved while in the second half of the game once Yumeno has opened her emotions, she’s more optimistic and throws jokes around a lot more to keep everyone’s spirits up.

I also really like their interactions in Chapter 4 and Yumeno’s love hotel. They’re extremely cute like Yumeno asking Saihara that if he was lost in thought from her beauty and then getting flustered over complimenting herself. Also, Yumeno’s artbook comment is really adorable “*pet pet* Good boy!”

5.Sainaga

This is a bit of a controversial choice, but I actually really love this ship. The reason for this is Angie’s FTEs and her love hotel. I just love the dynamic of the weird quirky girl dominating over the serious and submissive boy here. Strange, I wouldn’t think I’d enjoy a dynamic like that but apparently I do.

Angie’s final FTE has Angie admit that she’s in love with Saihara due to his aggression, and while said aggression was not Saihara’s intention, it sure got Angie to take a liking to him. And I can’t explain why but I loved their interaction. Angie’s quirky and ambiguously bizarre attitude played off of Saihara’s straight man side perfectly. It’s also a part of the FTEs that give some characterisation to Saihara as well as the one he’s hanging out with.

4.Saiten

Ah yes, I can hear people screeching in the distance. I clarified before that Tenko isn’t confirmed a lesbian, just incredibly likely is. In fact, I headcanon her as a lesbian. However, that doesn’t mean it’s a crime against humanity to ship her with a guy. If you guys can ship Komahina despite Hajime likely being straight, I can ship Tenko with Saihara and Kaito. With that out of the way, yes, I ship Saihara with Tenko.

Of course, this ship is incredibly unlikely or got a long way to go. I guess you could say Saiten has still got a ways to go. So why do I like Saiten? Well, as many people have picked up, Saihara seems to be the boy Tenko tolerates the most. She was a bit rude when her dojo showed up(not when they entered) and didn’t let him participate in the celebrity experience, but those aside, she seems to like Saihara. Or at least, she likes Saihara and doesn’t realize such considering her degenerate males thing is only delusion.

These two generally have some nice interactions throughout both Tenko’s FTEs and the main story. The dojo scene and her first FTE in particular shows that she does care about Saihara and respects him to some level despite constantly berating him for being a boy. The part of her FTE where she flips Saihara so hard he passes out, but she feels guilty and brings him to his bed soon after is one of my favorite moments in the FTEs of any of the V3 characters, really.

3.Oumasai

I have a full ship thoughts post on this and while it’s a little outdated, it still holds up opinion-wise. I find their main story interactions quite lacking outside of half of Chapter 4 and Chapter 3 but I really love the dynamic between these two in Ouma’s FTEs, Salmon mode ending and other bonus content. And yes, I am aware of how popular this ship is which results in it having a lot of fans and haters. That means that my liking to this ship and not Saihamatsu is probably going to get me some flak.

First off, I absolutely adore the aesthetic between these two. Ouma’s black, white and purple blends very well with Saihara’s white, black and blue but not in a way where they contrast so much. Saihara’s a detective and Ouma’s a supreme leader which can be bended into a cop and a phantom thief too, so their talents go hand-in-hand. Funny enough, Ouma’s love hotel is quite similar to that scenario.

Getting into their interactions and personalities, Ouma has trust issues and uses his coping mechanism to both keep himself alive and to avoid attachment to anyone. The reason for his ideals is currently unknown. However, despite everything, Ouma wants a friend. Someone who can see his true self and gain his trust. Since Saihara was a detective, he was Ouma’s opportunity to do so. Ouma’s FTEs are his attempt to get closer to Saihara and have a friend who can understand him and figure him out.

The game also implies that in the process of this that Ouma developed feelings for Saihara which is where the love for this ship spawned, thank you single-chapter-4-line-that-caused-an-entire-community-to-go-nuts. I also adore Ouma’s salmon mode ending. Not even the Super High School Level Detective can ace everything perfectly. Ouma calls Saihara out on trying to change him to reveal his true self rather than finding his true self through the fake one which is a pretentious attempt and not a strategy if you want to gain someone’s trust. However, Saihara does take up on Ouma’s idea and agrees to see his true self underneath. Unfortunately, the main story didn’t go as well and while Saihara couldn’t understand Ouma by the end, he still viewed him as his friend. Unfortunately, it was too late for that and Ouma was violently killed off.

2.Saimota

This is the true BROTP right here. After Kaede’s death, Kaito felt the need to carry on her wish and role as leader and tried to train Saihara’s confidence up and understand him like Kaede did. As a result, Kaito ended up understanding Saihara more than Kaede did. He’s what kept Saihara in line the whole time after Kaede’s death. As a result, he, along with Ouma and Kiibo, was the one who ultimately brought Saihara to confront his fear of exposing the truth and prepared him for the consequences in doing so.

Their main story summary aside, these two are pretty much the definition of a bromance. They’re a Kamina/Simon duo(I don’t like calling Kaito a Kamina clone because he isn’t, but Saimota does have a Simon/Kamina feel to it) in which there’s an unconfident but intelligent member and an arrogant but dumb member. What I find interesting however is the way they handle the Simon and Kamina type of relationship in which they have Kaito grow jealous of Saihara for being able to talk with both his mind and his heart while he can only do the latter and focus on his beliefs.

However, after Chapter 4, Kaito gains a lot of character development in which he learns to put his bias aside, use his head a little more and apologise to Saihara for venting out his jealousy onto him. It’s good that V3 gave character development to all of it’s main characters unlike the other games(DR1 had Kirigiri develop, SDR2 had Hajime develop, but DR1 still left Naegi and Togami(until the series went on and he became more of a friend to the group) for development and Chiaki and Komaeda focused more on being endearing characters than having development which isn’t a bad thing) and both Kaito and Saihara are no exception.

Also, can I just point out how Saihara acts like he has a crush on Kaito in his FTEs, like can we just talk about that beauty?

1.Saiibo

I had already made a post on this, but yes, I fucking love Saiibo. I love it a lot. It’s so cute and pure and sweet and comfy and perfect and- I really like Saiibo.

Okay yes, I admit that my favorite thing about this ship is just how cute it is. It is absolutely freaking adorable and even when I try to have a serious discussion on it, I always let my inner fangirl slide which I am proving as I type. Kiibo tries his hardest to be seen as a human and Saihara tries to help out every now and again only to end up comforting him on his failed efforts which is shown in Chapter 5.

I love how this ship is mostly background noise in the main story so it’s easy to appreciate and there’s no strong interactions nor conflict between the two so it also makes it a nice friendship in the background. In Kiibo’s FTEs, Saihara tries to help Kiibo get a career of some sort to help him feel more human and learns more about his history in the process. I’ll go in further depth in my FTE review but Kiibo’s FTEs are amazing for more reasons than the Saiibo scenes. My favorite part in Kiibo’s FTEs is his singing which is so bad Saihara is frightened by it.

And let’s not forget Chapter 6. With Kiibo bringing Saihara back to his senses, the audience erasing Kiibo’s AI through the survey poll and Saihara quite literally breaking his chains to save him. It’s definitely my favorite part of Chapter 6 and a really well done climax. And then you have Kiibo sacrifice himself for the survivors. One of the saddest moments in the game for me. There’s also Kiibo’s love hotel which is also really cute. Kiibo tries to learn romance with Saihara which results in the two holding hands.. Which Saihara points out isn’t really holding hands and just shaking hands.

And those were my top 16 Saihara ships. This was a bit of a short list, especially for one that took so long, but I thought it wouldn’t be fair if I gave in depth paragraphs to Saiharu, Saihamatsu and Oumasai while Saiibo, Saiguuji and Sainaga got almost nothing. I hope you enjoyed this quicky at the very least.

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avenger-hawk · 7 years ago

Note

May I ask what do you think of Naru/Hina ship and how it affect both characters? You never talk about it before. I really like your analyses and opinions on the manga

Heey thank you for your nice words~

And…I never talk about it because I don’t like H*inata and their relationship is the most boring thing ever🐍🐍

(anti-n*ruhina under the cut)

Unlike SS, a pairing that I’ve been hating since the beginning, and that makes me feel physically sick, I used to be completely indifferent towards NH. Part 2 made me like Narusaku, though, and I really dislike H*nata. Her personality is boring, I have nothing against shyness but hers borders on pathetic, her look is terrible (all those layers make her look like a homeless person living in the streets, is she cold or what?). She’s also unfit to be a shinobi, as for most of the story she’s either not being strong enough, or doing something impulsive and stupid (like a confession or tripping over a pebble), when she gets better results is when she’s surrounded by a group, like her team or another team, or the shinobi army. So apparently she gets her energy from being in a group. Which is ok I guess. In fact I was ok with her when she stayed with her Team 8 or with Neji. She seemed more rounded back then.

I never paid attention to them and I’m not following new stuff so bear with me because probably this isn’t complete or accurate.

To me it’s pretty obvious that it’s a one way crush since the beginning. N*ruto likes S*kura and defines her a dark weirdo or something like that, but he’s nice to everyone and to her it means a lot because she’s not as good as her father expects her to be, being the Hyuuga heir but being surpassed by both her younger sister and Neji. His determination and positive attitude despite being belittled and shunned by everyone are an inspiration for her to gain self confidence, so even though her progress is slow she becomes less insecure.

It sounds like a typical side plot for one of those side characters supporting the main character. In part 2 she might have been written as less insecure but her shyness is played for laughs at first, so when she pops out of nowhere and declares her love for N*ruto in the middle of a deathly battle against Pain, it sounds kind of creepy and inconsistent (like: ok, you love him and you want to protect him no matter if the enemy is waaaaaay stronger than you, but damn girl, focus on Pain instead of making a confession, because that’s what shinobi do!), especially because N*ruto doesn’t have any reaction. Like. Nothing at all. N*ruto. Someone who’s extremely reactive to anything.

Maybe it’s because unlike her he knows that there’s a strong enemy to fight…but still, when it’s over, the plot goes on and on and he never mentions anything about her confession. Which usually means that someone doesn’t give a damn about the person right? Then Neji dies and there’s that scene where she lightly slaps Naruto out of his despair when his friend does…that scene is supposed to make her appear strong, but the panel after she’s fangirling over N*ruto’s big warm hands so she only appears selfish and uncaring towards her cousin. And, again, creepy, because who the hell fangirls over her love interest’s hands when her cousin and older brother-like figure just died?

I could tell myself that this is fiction and it’s a shounen so it’s not supposed to be accurate in the way feelings are depicted. Too bad that there are a lot of relationship in the whole manga that are touching and deep and beautiful. Which brings to the movie The Last, where SP could have written their relationship in a decent, more realistic way. Since you read my rants (thank for that btw!) you know that I don’t care about realistic because this is fiction, but canon pairings remind me that there are couples who bring out the best of each other and others that bring out their complete worst. NH and SS are the latter. But this is not a solid argument. Speaking of realistic and unrealistic, while I’m ok with child soldiers, wonky politics, unhealthy anything and everything else, feelings like love, hate, friendship, rivalry, jealousy, selflessness, are universal. So SP or kishi or whomever, could have written N*ruto growing out of love for S*kura, getting to know H*nata for real and falling in love with her, but instead they chose to retcon their story, including her in his past thus shitting on who N*ruto really is and what he has been through during his lonely childhood, where they were complete strangers, him struggling with loneliness and confusion and anger and need to have some damn contact with people, her struggling with inadequacy.

N*ruto is not the smartest guy and he’s not the best at understanding feelings that he can’t relate to, but he’s not so idiotic that he would *love* S*kura out of rivalry against S*suke or whatever he said about that. That belittles his relationship with S*kura, even as a friendship only, and his relationship with S*suke. And, since this is about N*ruhina, it belittles their relationship too, not having written it in a way it could have made sense. So what it appears to me is a pairing decided through reader polls and nothing more~

#wingsfreedom #anti-naru//hina #anti naru//hina #vivalarevolution #vivalarevolution: bonds #also I like nejihina #also kibahina

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sheikah · 8 years ago

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Unsolicited Opinions on the Vampire Knight Fandom War/Therapeutic Ranting

First of all, I’ll give full disclosure by saying I barely deserve to call myself part of the VK fandom as a whole or the Zeki family because I have been out of the loop since 2013 when that ending killed my soul. Also, grad school ate up all my time to spend emotionally stewing in my feels about this story over the past couple of years. But I’m going to post my thoughts on the current Vampire Knight fandom war anyway because after only a week back in it, I am seriously baffled by what is going on here. I’m going to try to break my ideas down I guess for anyone reading this but it is more rant than analysis, really.

1. Why I am Weepy Zeki Trash

Alright so like many others, I was hopeless Zeki trash. I haven’t shipped an anime/manga pairing that hard in my life. Zero’s devotion to Yuki just seriously broke my heart and was so beautifully written and drawn by Hino. I couldn’t imagine a better romance. I loved all of the turbulence and obstacles and felt like Hino was writing exactly what I was feeling with every new volume.

I’ve been re-reading the manga lately and Hino says in the margins of volume 1 that when she first started writing, she was worried that Zero’s character would be overshadowed by Kaname, but that looking at it now she knows she managed not to let that happen and did a good job on his character. I couldn’t agree with her more. Zero is one of the best male romantic manga protagonists I have ever encountered. In her early fan polls, he was the most popular character by a wide margin.

Let’s start early. In the St. Xocolatl Day chapter, Zero, who is clearly already harboring romantic feelings for Yuki, gives Kaname Yuki’s gift when she doesn’t have the guts to do it herself. Let’s unpack that for a second. This guy gives a token of romantic affection to his rival on his crush’s behalf. He is that interested in Yuki’s own happiness that he will actually try to get her together with the guy she likes himself, even though doing so would ruin his own chances.

To me, it’s easy to see why. My favorite thing about Zero is that he is so respectful of Yuki and not possessive of her at all, but somehow we are still able to see the depth of his feelings for her without him having to devolve into some of the creepier behaviors that I see from the male love interests in other manga (and honestly in VK from Kaname. But more on that later). Yuki’s correct to say that she constantly hurts Zero and we can see in his patience with her that his love is just as deep as Kaname’s and I would argue even deeper. But what’s different about Zero is that he also calls Yuki on her bullshit any time she steps out of line, and challenges her all the time. He is himself around her and she around him.

Here are some examples of what I mean.

However, Zero also respects Yuki enough to be straight with her and he frequently tells her how absurd he thinks it is for her to pursue a relationship with Kaname, a vampire. Basically he respects her enough to talk to her about things in a way that many of the other characters don’t. It’s a sleight of hand around every turn with Kaname, Kaien, etc for Yuki as there is always some deeper mystery for her to uncover and challenge for her to face, often dealing with the past. This could be made simpler by people being honest with her, but she is often treated like a child and important information is hidden from her even though she is trustworthy and capable.

Zero doesn’t treat her that way and he’s arguably the only character that doesn’t (aside from Yori and maybe Aido, who would never underestimate her because he is always suspicious of her haha. Bless him.) Starting in the very first chapter, Zero makes his distaste for Kaname clear, refusing to coddle Yuki just to seem like a “nice guy” and ingratiate himself to her. But this criticism of Kaname is obviously for Yuki’s wellbeing and not out of jealousy, because he continues to facilitate a relationship between them if it will make Yuki happy.

1. He thinks that he doesn’t have a chance. He sees how she is with Kaname and she is constantly going on about how much she loves Kaname, so he doesn’t think she will return his feelings. He withholds his feelings not out of fear of hurting his pride, but because he wants to remain her friend even though a relationship seems unlikely. In this case, Zero is once again commendable for being a true friend to Yuki and being willing to stay at her side without agenda.

Zero is so non-jealous and supportive of Yuki that even when Kaname declares Yuki his “lover” when her memories begin returning in the second arc, Zero accompanies them on a date at Kaname’s behest, standing by quietly as his rival childishly rubs his relationship with Yuki in his face. Zero literally just sits there and lets it happen. This might come off as weak but I actually think it shows profound emotional strength and composure to watch the woman you love in the arms of another man and to keep a level head. To me this just further emphasizes the intensity of his love for Yuki, that he will suffer through watching her with someone else because he knows that it is what she wants.

Speaking of relationships, for most of the series Zero has several openings to confess to Yuki or take their relationship further. One that comes to mind is when he has that nightmare sort of early on and almost kisses her in relief when he wakes to find her safe and sound. Yuki seems on board with what he was about to do. But he doesn’t do it. And it’s not out of cowardice to me. I can think of two reasons that Zero waits for so long to go “all in” with Yuki:

2. The other option, the way I see itm is that Zero feels that a relationship with Yuki would only cause her more pain in the end, that if they get more involved, she will be more hurt when he inevitably falls to level E. Of course this theory only works earlier in the series before he discovers she is a vampire, too, before it is clear that he can stave off falling to level E, etc.

So since their relationship is platonic for most of the series, it only makes many of the things Zero does for her even more endearing. Despite his surly attitude (which I find adorable anyway) he really is a good friend to her. He tries to help her uncover her past before she regains her memories, he gives her advice about Kaname (yes, this actually happens building up to her awakening as a pureblood), he tutors her when she is having trouble in school, he cooks her dinner, tends to her wounds every time her clumsy self gets the best of her, he covers her up when she’s cold…He’s considerate in small but meaningful ways. While there are times when it seems Hino tries to pass Yori off as Yuki’s best friend, it’s really Zero, and that alone is something wonderful about his character. We as the reader can see how deeply he loves her, but he doesn’t pine about it pitifully, plan to exit some “friend zone,” or act macho and try to intimidate her other suitors like Kaname does. He is perfectly content to be her friend and nothing more.

Most of what Zero does, really, is just for Yuki, but he doesn’t expect anything in return. He doesn’t do grand romantic gestures with cryptic messages attached like *cough* Kaname *cough* Maybe the most important example of what I’m talking about is Zero’s life itself. After he has turned into a vampire, he wishes to die almost immediately. I can understand this wish. At first he believes Ichiru to be dead, his parents are dead, and he is in constant, excruciating pain. His body rejects blood tablets and consuming human blood goes against every ideal he was raised to hold. The worst part is that he is eventually forced to take blood from the one person he most wants to protect from vampires, Yuki. All the while, he watches her love another man and takes part in a career as a hunter that forces him to kill his own kind–humans who were unwillingly turned into vampires. He is miserable. No one could blame him for wanting to end his life. But he doesn’t, and this is what is key to me. He doesn’t, because Yuki begs him to stay with her. And again, he doesn’t think that this is going to end in them falling in love. He just prolongs his suffering to remain at her side because it makes her smile sometimes, and that is enough for him.

Even when Yuki awakens as a pureblood and by all accounts he should hate her, he doesn’t. He claims to. He tries to. He has reasons to. But he doesn’t hate her and he never hurts her, despite his dramatic promise to hunt her down. He forsakes his most personal ideals just to keep her safe and that’s not something to sneeze at!

Later, when Yuki can see his feelings for her growing stronger and knows that it will only cause him more pain because of her situation with Kaname, she erases his memories, knowing that it will bring him peace. My favorite part of this is that he falls in love with her again anyway. Even when he doesn’t know who she is, and thinks of her only as a pureblood vampire, he –still– can’t hurt her because his love for her runs that deep, and that brings his memories back to him.

Most recently, I think the most selfless act of all is Zero’s willingness to raise the daughter Yuki had with another man. I mean COME ON that is so rare. He is also happy to stay with Yuki even when she is reluctant to start a relationship with him following Kaname’s death. He is patient and not pushy when it comes to her reciprocating his feelings. I seriously can’t even handle his perfection. Really, how can you not love Zero?

So I think I’ve unpacked why Zero himself is so great, but it takes two to make a ship so I think I will just go on to say that it is equally obvious that Yuki loves him, too. After all, no one in either camp of this conflict is doubting that Zero loves Yuki. They think Yuki doesn’t love Zero, or loves Kaname more.

Moving along, when Shizuka appears Yuki actually considers trying to kill Kaname to save Zero. I argue this because during the ball when they are dancing on the balcony, only then does Yuki think to herself that there is no way she could possibly kill Kaname. Only after seeing him at the ball and being touched by his kindness does she flee to find Shizuka and offer herself up, and she does this without hesitation because to Yuki, any price is worth saving Zero’s life, even if it will be a short one before he turns to Level E.

In the first arc, Zero is clearly her first priority in that she is willing to accept Kaname’s disdain and any potential punishment from her father for breaking school rules by allowing Zero to drink her blood. To me that shows love, and this could be a friendly sort of love. I guess at first it is. But as time goes on it becomes more and more clear that Yuki loves Zero in a romantic fashion.

Again, on St. Xocolatl Day, Yuki attempts to cook handmade chocolates for Kaname and fails, apparently ruining her batch. She buys a flashy candy box to give to Kaname, worried that he would judge her own cooking. But she is able to produce just one successful chocolate and she chooses to give it to Zero. Yeah, he gets the personal gift, the intimate gift, and she hand feeds it to him for Christ’s sake.

After Kaname kills Shizuka, Yuki further demonstrates her loyalty to Zero when she turns on Kaname to protect Zero from the vampire Senate. She is willing to never speak to Kaname again unless he clears Zero name. This is huge to me, and so, so important to point out, because it demonstrates that despite the love she bore for Kaname at that time, she was willing to lose him completely if it meant keeping Zero safe.

Later, in the infamous almost-kiss scene after Zero’s nightmare, Yuki reflects back on this with flashbacks several times. She thinks about it A LOT. Because, duh, it was hot and she wanted him to kiss her, even if she isn’t ready to admit that to herself yet.

Even later, after Yuki has awoken as a pureblood, this is where I think her love for Zero becomes the most clear. As many others have discussed in great detail, one of the most telling indicators of Yuki’s love for Zero is her desire for his blood and her inability to be satisfied by Kaname’s. I won’t go into that again because so many already have, but it was Kaname himself who told Yuki that a vampire could only be sated by the blood of their beloved, and Yuki is extra bloodthirsty until she finally starts drinking Zero’s blood. She explicitly states that part of her heart will always belong to Zero, though she does love Kaname, too. Of course, we also know that she is able to survive just fine for a millenia after Kaname’s death on Zero’s blood alone. It follows that he is the person she loves most.

Her demeanor is just different around Zero, too, for the entire series. She is happy and herself around Zero. They joke with each other sometimes. She confides in him and cries to him. With Kaname, it seems to me that she is constantly walking on eggshells. Some might argue that that is because she loves him so much and is so worried about upsetting him, but that is sort of toxic in my opinion. If that’s the case it’s infatuation, not love.

Even when Zero proclaims that he will kill Yuki after he finds out she is a pureblood, she isn’t angry. Instead she vows to keep running from him to give him a reason to live. She vows to make her own life more difficult and complicated just to keep Zero going.

At the end of their story as we know it so far, Yuki decides to end her life after Zero is killed. I think this is such an interesting point because it is one being used by both ships to support their case. Yume people see it as proof that Yuki still loves Kaname the most because she is giving her life to resurrect him as a human even after so much time has passed. I disagree. I think it is proof that Yuki loves Zero the most because without him, she has no motivation to go on living, and is ready to give her life for Kaname at last. She had considered doing this in the past, remember; but she is only willing to do it when the option to be with Zero is no longer there. Once he is dead, she grieves for him and follows him into death, even though she has two children she could spend her life with.

Lastly, aside from all of the inner monologues and dialogue that support this ship, I also think that the sheer chemistry between the two characters is really powerful and important here. Zero and Yuki have more physical contact than any of the other characters throughout the series and to be frank, it’s hot. When he drinks her blood, even at first, it is something that is always sexually charged under Hino’s capable pen. Zero and Yuki are very comfortable with one another and he’s always holding her, or her him. I don’t know, there is just so much more obvious affection between them, to me, than she and Kaname. My favorite example is the masque scene when they pretend to be strangers and wind up kissing. It’s just a testament to how their circumstances and not their feelings are what keep them apart, because if they were just two people who met on a dance floor, they would be drawn inexorably together right away. It’s so damned perfect, yall.

So that’s why Zeki is wonderful.

2. Yume. Why tho?

Okay, I have to get this out somewhere. I started with the positives, with why I love my ship. But I have to rant for just a little bit now.

I mean this sincerely: I genuinely DO. NOT. GET. how Yume is so popular. Let’s pretend Zero didn’t exist (*gasp*), and VK was a love story between Yuki and Kaname as he exists in the series. I wouldn’t finish it. I mean that. To me, it is so problematic for so many reasons.

Above I spent a lot of time explaining why I think Zero so clearly loves Yuki and Yuki so clearly loves Zero. I don’t need to explain that Kaname loves Yuki. I will gives the Yume people that much, obviously Kaname loves her. I will even agree that she obviously loves Kaname, too. But to me that is kind of a small factor to take into account here.

She loves him, but in a really uncomfortable, frightened, obligated sort of way for a good sizable chunk of the series. She loves Kaname because she feels indebted to him for saving her, and then because of her memories with him as a brother. This feels altogether different than the relationship built on trust and shared experience with Zero. I have already explained why I think Yuki loved Zero more so I don’t need to go into detail about why I think her feelings for Kaname aren’t as strong, because those two arguments are tied together. Instead, I am going to make a different argument entirely: that in this case, it doesn’t really matter who she loves “more” because of how problematic of a character Kaname is.

When Yuki is trying to regain her memories, Kaname talks to her like she is a mischievous toddler and dismisses her concern, instead trying to misdirect her by randomly confessing his love to her at a very inappropriate time, solely to throw her off the scent. Since Yuki has been wanting Kaname romantically for so long, this might seem sweet to the people that ship it. I think it is twisted and bizarre as hell. Even Yuki doesn’t believe it when he says it so out of the blue, and it hurts her to think he is pretending to confess love just to distract her. Yuki at this stage is genuinely distraught, having nightmares and hysterically crying in Zero’s arms. She even tries to strangle Zero in her sleep. This is someone who held it together after her best friend randomly bit her in the jugular and drank her blood before she knew he was a vampire. She kept her cool when that happened. But when her memories start to return, she is crying over how scared she is, hallucinating, losing sleep, and fainting in class. Clearly this is affecting her worse than anything else ever has and Kaname’s answer to that is to distract her by taking her on some idiotic picnic and creepily declaring that they are “lovers?” What even?

What I mean is, Yume people could post until they are blue in the face about why Yuki loves Kaname more. (They already do this, I know). I don’t buy most of their points, but even if I did–I could never ship this. Kaname to me is a clearly abusive and possessive character. I know it’s fantasy. I know none of this is real and that he is a vampire. But he does some truly messed up things throughout the series and rereading the manga and watching the anime through I am honestly shocked that anyone ships them at all.

Here are some examples.

He also lies to her on multiple occasions and erases her memory. He sees her as someone he can manipulate because until she awakens as a pureblood, he has knowledge that she doesn’t, and he absolutely exploits that knowledge. Yuki even says constantly that he treats her like a child. Contrast this with the way that Zero treats her, outlined in detail above. Night and day, people. (Literally, lol).

After she awakens as a pureblood, he basically holds her prisoner in the mansion by making her feel guilty. She always comment on how lonely and sad he seems, and how he would be even moreso without her. He also keeps her close by hinting that she isn’t safe, though with vampire strength she is arguably less vulnerable than ever before. During this time frame, their whole relationship seems so depressing and just difficult. When you love someone, it shouldn’t be that hard to just spend time with them. And yes, there were all kinds of other dramas getting in the way, but they had domestic problems from day one and she was always talking about Zero. Kaname saw all this and still was just so possessive of her that it really bothers me a lot.

There are several moments where Kaname honestly seems sort of sadistic to me. He tortures Zero, allows horrible things to happen to him, for him to come within an inch of his life multiple times. He toys with him psychologically and finds him when he is most thirsty to essentially force Zero to consume his blood so that he can exert power over him. All the while he claims to do this for Yuki, but he could keep Zero alive without so many games and near-death experiences if you ask me. By contrast, even after everything that has happened, in volume 19 Zero willingly allies with Kaname at the very end and doesn’t treat him with nearly the derision Kaname does him. He isn’t nice to Kaname but he doesn’t torture him and mess with him. Kaname taunts Zero leading up to his transformation into an vampire in the first arc and also talks down to him for being a potential Level E constantly after that. Kaname’s treatment of Zero is absolutely the result of fragile masculine jealousy and it sickens me. Zero’s only crime was being born a vampire hunter and being loved by Yuki. We have countless examples of his gentle and forgiving nature but Kaname loathes him. Of course, Zero doesn’t like Kaname either, but he doesnt exert the same influence over Kaname that Kaname does over him so it just isn’t really fair, and is indicative of weird alpha male tendencies in Kaname.

And here’s the thing that no one seems to mention. I know that Japan is different than the west and that anime and manga have a lot of strange relationships that we wouldn’t really consider normal on American TV or in comics, but Kaname and Yuki’s whole situation just doesn’t feel romantic to me. It feels creepy. He is this ancient being, centuries old, and his lover when he is reborn as a Kuran is Yuki. This would already be a bit strange if they were born at the same time, if he was reborn as a baby when Yuki is also an infant. But he is already much older when she is born, and he instantly latches on to this baby in a brotherly role, that eventually turns paternal when her parents are murdered. He watches her entire life, watches her grow up literally from infancy. He is just as much a father figure to her as Kaien in a lot of ways, and then randomly, when she is a young teenager, it suddenly becomes romantic, and later sexual? I’m sorry guys, but that rubs me the wrong way. I have never been in the midst of VK in either manga or anime format and thought for even a flicker of a second that Kaname is the one Yuki is supposed to be with.

3. That ending -_-

All of this is complicated by the manga’s ending in 2013. I felt almost 100% sure reading the manga that Hino herself wanted Yuki and Zero as end game. The relationship with Kaname did have meaningful and emotional segments but it never felt to me like the one she preferred. As die-hard Zeki as I am, I know the ending of the manga in 2013 was a total Yume-friendly ending, and it wrecked me. It brushed Zero off as a character entirely, offering no closure and leaving no one happy. I honestly would have rathered her just leave Kaname alive even though I don’t ship it, because the wishy-washy ending we got was awful. Writing should be from the heart, not to please a fan base. I feel like Hino’s ending was one that didn’t step too firmly on either side of the fence, even if it was a clear Yume preference, and that she did this so that she wouldn’t be forced to choose a side and piss anyone off too badly. It’s my opinion that that backfired because the ending seems unpopular on the whole.

So I am really happy that we have these extra chapters and VK Memories to look forward to. But I cautiously tell my fellow Zeki people not to expect a Zeki happy ending (I know Zero dies, but you get what I am saying) because who knows what will happen. Things may look favorable for us right now, but they did during the manga’s regular run, too.

Here is what I truly want–our author needs to take a side. I want an ending with more closure. I want something that shows us the true nature of Yuki’s relationship with Zero and how she really felt about Kaname when she gifted him with humanity at the cost of her own life. It is all so grey right now, and that, I think, is what makes this “fandom war” so vicious–there is something to fight about because nothing is clear. No one can say for sure what Hino’s intentions were and who Yuki loves more because it ended so abruptly with no clear answer either way. It seems like she could love Kaname more for sacrificing herself, but also that she could love Zero more for waiting until he is gone and then following him in death. It’s too ambiguous.

That being said, in grad school I studied the idea of “death of the author,” the idea that an author’s intent when composing a piece of literature is not important. Trying to argue what he/she was thinking is not as important as arguing what the text itself is saying. I’m not saying that what Hino wanted doesn’t matter. But I do think that if she chooses a route that we don’t necessarily like, it will be easy, based on her writing style so far, to still find hints of an outcome we wanted, that when VK Memories ends, if things go poorly for either ship, we can all analyze the text to see that the characters Hino made speak for themselves, and draw our own conclusions from that.

4. People are mean.

I have seen some ship conflicts in multiple fandoms in my time on tumblr. What we have in the VK tag right now is especially ugly, and I don’t get a lot of it.

I’m gonna focus on the recent “star-crossed lovers” nonsense. When a Zeki blog tagged a post as “star-crossed lovers” this really twisted some Yume shipper panties and people got very angry that we would dare to call Zero and Yuki star-crossed, posting long analyses of how Zero and Yuki don’t really have any obstacles between them and that since they were together for 1000 years the ending isn’t tragic.

Okay, I took a breath because I needed one after even repeating that ridiculousness. I need someone to tell me how the freaking head vampire hunter and uber powerful vampire are not star-crossed. Seriously, that alone should be enough to complicate their relationship, but it’s made even more difficult by Zero’s backstory and extra hatred for vampires, his own status as a third class vampire in society, Yuki’s long life span as a pureblood, and even Kaname himself as a rival. These are some pretty intense odds. That’s textbook star-crossed lovers right there guys. Sorry.

I’ve also seen Yume people make huge bullet point lists of how much more star-crossed Yume is for a bunch of reasons that aren’t reasons. Yuki and Kaname are both purebloods who were destined from her birth. They were an arranged marriage. That is the polar opposite of star-crossed or forbidden love. They definitely had their fair share of obstacles, but it isn’t the same, mainly because Kaname created a lot of those obstacles with his own crazy schemes.

But the real thing I want to address here is how petty it is that someone saw the tag and took issue with the tag being applied to Zeki. Both couples are star-crossed in their own way, okay? Christ. Why does it bother you so much to know that the other ship thinks the characters are star-crossed? Yume folks, for three years the ending has been in your favor. Rest on your laurels and let Zeki people savor this rare chance to have things go well for us.

At the end of the day, this was a story that all of us obviously loved. Otherwise, we wouldn’t be fighting about it so fiercely. What would be better, I think, would be to come together and hope for an ending that we like more than the disaster of 2013, to hope that Yuki is made to have a clear choice one way or another in a conclusion that doens’t leave people on both sides feeling so empty and confused.

5. Final Thoughts

I don’t like fandom shaming of any kind. So to any Yume people who read this, that wasn’t my intent. And unlike many Yume people I’ve seen, I’m not going to cross tag it and shove it down your throats. But I wanted this post to be seen so that maybe some of the more understanding people can see why so many of us don’t like the Yume ship, and also why this fandom war is getting so hostile. Don’t go onto the other tag and start drama with people if you truly do just want to be left to enjoy your ship. And join together in the hoping for some great material to read in 2017.

Happy New Year folks :D And sorry for the textbook length post. Whoa.

@justiceforzerokiryuu I thought maybe you would appreciate this haha. Totally understand if you don’t read my novel though :P

#text post #rant #zeki #vampire knight memories #vk memories #zero x yuki #vampire knight

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