#shes just a completely real person idk
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we as a society do not talk about Karen Wilson enough
#no one is doing it like her#shes just so fucking cool#and such a thoroughly fleshed out character that she doesn't even seem like a character#shes just a completely real person idk#karen wilson#911#911 abc#911 fox#911 show#9 1 1#9 1 1 show#9 1 1 fox#9 1 1 abc
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je n'ai pas peur, je suis née pour faire ça
#fate grand order#jeanne d'arc#jeanne alter#jalter#fgo#fanart#i will always support a vegenful joan darc even if the real historical figure was very much accepting of her fate#although one just wonders if she was really. idk i think about joan darc a bit too often compared to the normal person#it disappointed me that in fate jeanne alter is just an oc with jeannes name instead of being like#a manifestation of jeannes anger and betrayal (which are completely justified given the circumstances)#anyways#the caption means “i am not afraid; i was born to do this” in shitty french probably
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im a eurydice = solas truther btw and ill die for my beliefs
be so serious........ and lavellan as orpheus......
#I NEED TO BE LOBOTOMIZED. TRULY.#i dont even know where to start i feel like i cant even post abt this bc theres no way all my thoughts can fit coherently lol#like the 2nd act/hadestown soul-selling business is just solas committing to his goals....#who would win eurydice/solas ''i walk the dinan'shiral - there is only death on this journey'' or orpheus/lavellan walking it anyway lol#to find them and bring them home again#also if the solas-is-a-spirit-that-mythal-bound theory turns out true then the hades = mythal parallels well. they are parelleling <3#''And the choice is yours / if you're willing to choose / Seeing as you've got nothing to lose / And I could use a canary'' HELLO????#ik the other popular interpretation is solas as orpheus but idk solas/eurydice just makes me crazy . it works so well#like theres that one interaction thats like#eurydice: “i havent seen a spring or fall since.... i cant recall”#orpheus "thats what im working on / a song to fix what's wrong / take whats broken#make it whole / a song so beautiful / it brings the world back into tune''#and thats very solas coded. BUT its also such a good parellel to high approval lavellan's fixing the world thru the inquisition/anchor#and thru their kindness and curiosity and all the things he thought were lost in arlathan. the things that make him think maybe shes Real#and it could all be real and worthwhile.#solas recognising the depth and personhood of lavellan thru their [from his pov endearingly naive] actions and spirit#''i havent seen a spring or fall since...i cant recall'' / ''you show a wisdom i have not seen since.... since my deepest journeys into the#ancient memories of the fade'' what if i lost my entire goddamn mind. what if i just completely lost it lol#ok im done im so sorry i feel like harrassing every single person ive ever met with this information like idek what to do with myself lol
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being a huge fan of tlou but also like. thinking that certain stories are built for certain mediums. like the entire theme of tlou2 is grounded and fresh because it’s a railroad/story video game that still affords you mechanical choices in how you navigate the world. i just don’t have a lot of confidence that presenting that story in a tv show with the minimal adjustments that they did in s1 will be fulfilling or compelling in any comparable way. because with tlou1 some of the like. beauty of that story was simply that it was such an emotive story contained in the medium of video games. and some of that was retained just by hitting similar or expanded emotional beats in the show, like the episodes that expanded on the life of the characters and the realities of that world. but truly so much of tlou2 emotional depth and ‘why does this story matter’ rests in the fact that’s it’s your hands on the controller, continually choosing to go forward in the story and have hope that it will work out in your-as-ellie-or-abby-or-somehow-booth’s favour. and you simply cannot get that in a non-interactive medium like television. like i do think tlou2 is a good story but it’s a good story because of the investment required by the player to keep pressing buttons and keep returning and to feel the adrenaline like responses of high intensity moments and be jarringly shifted into backstories that only increase the frustration. in general i’ve been thinking a lot about cross-medium adaptation and on the one hand i am glad that season 1 makes the story of the last of us more accessible to people who wouldn’t pick up a video game but it’s also like. maybe instead we can destigmatize video games as this inaccessible and dangerous medium a bit more instead of just . implicitly agreeing . like no maybe your mom won’t pick up a video game controller and play the last of us . but maybe you can play the game in the living room. sometimes the mediums that stories are told in aren’t just important but are actually foundational parts of how the information of a story is conveyed and that’s not only okay but is fucking fantastic. we should be happy actually that there are so many ways to collect a bunch of themes and ideas and put them together and hold them out to someone else and say “won’t you consider this with me. won’t you feel these emotions and care about these characters with me.”
#i’ve been thinking about this both for academic and personal reasons#where like. my thesis literally includes discussion of tlou2 and it’s profundity because of the players position as in control but without#real decision making power in the story#and it’s like. you’re the person animating these two ptsd ridden women who subject themselves to be puppets to their#own grief . and there’s something particularly resonant about the fact that you can’t change the Story. you can only play it.#and like . i’ve talked with my mom a lot about the last of us#since i played it the first time and it really just rocked my shit. and i remember walking out my bedroom after i’d finished tlou2#feeling that odd mixture of empty and completely fulfilled by a good story with tears in my eyes#and a few years later when i visited home and had happened to bring my ps4 along with me and i was having a rough time#my mom asked if i’d want to show her tlou. because she knew i loved it and because i’ve told her it has tropes she’d enjoy#but the only games she’ll ever play are point and click because she’s stubborn and some physicality stuff#but like i remember sitting on the couch just. playing this game and it wasn’t the exact same as her playing it herself . but sometimes her#commentary was like it was.#i just. idk man. tlou lover wants to be hyped but seeing the exact same visuals from the game just in tv show format is like#. what’s the point. why are you distilling the themes by removing the active (non)agency of the player and#replacing it with the passive role of ‘watcher’ in a story so emphatically about having an active role in the action#anyway#tagging this#tlou#for blog organization but this isn’t discourse or whatever just me thinkin my thoughts on my blog
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i haven't even seen the episode yet, but learning about the fact that they didn't include such an essential aspect of the story is making me feel so irrationally sad
#letters from stephanie*#idk maybe it isn't essential maybe it's just too important to me... but without it you take away so much from lila...#she's not a crazy person that is too enigmatic for the audience to understand... lila is the character you feel in your soul#not explain in a few sentences. there is no Grand Secret of Lila to be revealed. you feel her or you don't and that's it.#yeah this is my hot take on lila. if the main takeaway is that she's a mysterious madwoman you're treating her the same#way all those men did. why can't we just feel things why does it have to be written in big shining letters#to be considered real and human. idk idk idk#she is surrealism the spirit of surrealism packed in a person and i think that is the truth of life. to misunderstand this is to completely#miss the point of lila as a character#which is that we as humans invent shapes to store the incomprehensible in and in that we take away from the reality of life#the raw beating heart of life. lila cerullo who has spent her life in one place who didn't get to go to school#understood and saw this beating heart of the universe and while studying history of her city she gets to...#extend the logic of it to the whole universe. she recognises these historical facts within her own being#she finds her daughter in these stories and she runs to her. i am so upset about this#i have to watch the episode though i can't betray my fundamental belief that you have to face life no matter what#ferranteposting#l'amica geniale#s4 spoilers#my brilliant friend spoilers#lila cerullo 🫀
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oh for fucks sakeeeeee
#i do believe being able to just cry about it would fix me but i cant lol#which is stupid af because otherwise im very quick like lightning speed quick to cry when its Not About Me#but when i could actually use it for personal benefit and idk some emotional release its the fucking sahara desert#until it builds up to the point where i get a genuinely scary ass episode like i go into full oscar worthy hysterics#sobbing choking literally howling like a husky in the shower and banging my head against the wall etc etc#real fucking bonkers stuff only for it to last like a few minutes and then i just bounce right back like uwu teehee normal again 🤪#rinse and repeat like three or four times a year. id definitely prefer to just be able to cry as i go instead of powering up for months#for this one special performance that makes me feel like a fucking animal in the wild and like i belong in a straightjacket. what the fuck#i need to get drunk like completely shitfaced and i need a girl to tell me she thinks im beautiful#not even pretty. beautiful. insane to me but it worked last time. shit made me cry like a baby lol#i should get drunk more often
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just recently watched this is us with my college friends
#tbqh i found it kinda boring 😭#the louis clips were so not enough#ive watched some clips online prior to actually watching it (for the first time might i add)#one of my friends had a cousin who was crazyyy ab 1d so she dragged her out to the cinema to go watch it when it came out and in 3d lol 😭#the 3d schtick is so funny 2 me lmao 😭#my friend recalls freaking out in the movie theater bc she was a major niall fan at the time. she said 3d niall was so close 2 her face lol#anyway. ab how i watched some clips online prior#i was actually waiting for the louis n his sisters part or the one where he visits his school or smth#my friends.... they literally don't know a thing ab louis personality-wise so they didn't really get much from it#UGH i should download aotv and make them watch it that was way more interesting (but idk? smth about it feels like it's made for fans only?#but... i'll suggest it the next time we get together 🙏🏼#anyw back to my review.#simon cowell's face was a jumpscare what can i say. it was so evil how nicole scherzinger was just. completely written off#im from the future i Know things#<- and like. about this. i felt kinda bad being cynical about the movie when i know my friend is Still an ot5 at heart#i think i broke her 13-year old heart a little 😭#it's so weird how the movie keeps singling out zayn about him getting kicked out or him talking solo music etc kskdj. feels v pointed Lol#they really just documented the 1d-mania & madness they ensued huh.... i think 2 of my friends (bts fans) weren't as impressed LOL 😭#they kinda flamed their performances and stage outfits which is. yeah i agree. kpop idols do WAY more than just.... that (1d) kskskd#i guess i'll make them watch the extra clips next time (o haven't seen all the clips yet i think)#OH and 😭 why was martin scorsese in the film that was hilarious#didn't have a lot of realness to it. is what i thought of the film. yeah. this is(N'T) us ✊🏽😔#maybe... i am too much of a hater#i liked... the... um. it's hard to highlight things i liked ab the film when im Not a 1d fan 😭 like im a louie ONLY idgaf ab 1d 😔#the part ab louis audition.... im sorry babie the editors did u dirty but it was so funny........😭#<- though i imagine it solidified people's (wrong) opinions about him :/
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ok i might need to force myself to not romance astarion bc i don't want to know what it says about me to turn down karlach, the woman of my dreams, the character made to cater me personally, like, if she was real i'd bring the moon and stars down for the chance to see her smile, she's everything i've hoped for in a rpg companion, what does it say about me if i turn that down for someone like astarion
#ngl karlach would be too good for me and i wouldnt deserve it#shed probably ask me stuff like 'what do you want?' upon which i would be paralyzed with fear my mind completely blank unable#to process why i can't answer a simple question#and she's so up front with her emotions which i absolutely adore but i could not reciprocate that#wait am i actually for real avoiding the karlach romance bc i feel like this fictional character from a video game is too good for me#a real human being. like. i think i would feel guilty about romancing her#which makes no sense bc i romance characters too good for anyone all of the time. but idk#in those cases ive always had like a strong character i play as who is very divorced from who i am#but playing as durge there is no past so idk who my tav is yet so all i can do is project so he feels very. personal#im v sleepy and also ive had brain fog all day so yea idk#i mean i do genuinely like astarion and his character but in his case i dont feel guilty bc i feel like i#i have no idea how to finish that sentence without it sounding like 'i can fix him'#bc i dont want to fix him i want to show him compassion and respect him and his boundaries so he'll be able to reclaim tje feeling of#being in control of his life#so he'll stop putting people down to feel like hes on a pedestal#like i get him and why he is like that but i just feel like being kind and caring towards him would feel so good#it wouldnt fix him and thats a good thing bc i dont want him to change who he is but i do think he needs support#also hes hot im so mad at myself for being so atteacted to him#we wouldnt b here if i didnt have a thing for voices#besides thag back to the main point of astarion its like. ugh! im so frustrated rn bc i dont have the words#to express my emotions toward him bc everything ive said lacks the nuance that im feelikg but idk how to put it in words#i guess i want to protect him? that such a terrible sentence and still not what om going for
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my biggest dissonance is how robert de niro in once upon a time in america actually looks like young carlo (but more handsome than carlo) but noodles character is nothing like him like max is a certifed carlo core. he would do everything max did
#noodles is eddie core. such a dissonance#anyway. another reason i crave moretti dlc is that all these young guys ardnt supposed to be handsome#no more handsome young mafiosos. and they would also be morally ugly. i crave it sm#good sees im so attached to higher ranks characters in m2 is bc theyre way#more relatable. god please. i live in a godawful country everyone here turn cursed at early age#and bout character design. id give some of them monobows at least not full ok#n tanned skin. some characters look like my armenian relatives im sorry. and ik that#it & arm ppl sometimes look very alike and i mean#luca frank carlo eddie rocco - just on top of my head#my roman empire is when i did character design for don henry fic carlo supposed to have#a full mononrow#but i was a chicken shit (i still am). if i wasnt he would have it & eddie had more tanned skin#but ok hes from canada he'll be pale makes sense. but still i need more of them#to look more like southerns like. pretty please? ok lemme remake at least#carlo n roccos designs please. if i was a strong person id redraw morettis design too#but idk. i think yeah its logical for him too look more like torrio#anyway. i believe half of m2 & mde characters should be thicker im sorry theyre italian#and they also rich. theyre rich italians. why r they so thin.#have u seen al capone. ok sorry. ik that i also draw them pretty thin but its bc im a chicken shit#anyway my conclusion i need moretti dlc so bad god. so funny that itll never happen#bout chicken shit ik that lauretta shouldnt be super thin either esp after marriage#& ok if we ever we'll see henrys mother & shell be thin id start to howl sorry#she mothered for 7 times she cant be thin#if we ever will* dont mind me im stupid#atp my fav m2 designs r frank carlo n joe. n also luca#<- if to speak only bout italian characters. but m2 in general have good ch. design#i remember that one beef bout fat bald italians. didnt say anything back then bc i was too lazy#but im on the side of fat balding italians. did u forget that italians have like. strong food culture#+ alcohol w food. mostly they arent supposed to be thin like just logically sorry get real#upd. derek is a peak character design to me. hes very vivid + completely bonds w his character. hes a cool ch. in general
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Ep 7 :)
#Like. The real issue isn't Louisa. I really get it actually.#Being extremely anxious and finding comfort in an overconfident person who does all the talk and alleviates your worries–#is a very nice and real sentiment.#That said when you put it in the context of a franchise who just can't have women with agency.#Seeing her go through this complete abnegation is so... :///#Like you see Lucy go “It might be because she doesn't care about herself too much” and you'd expect the direction of the arc–#to be going towards a Louisa character development where she values herself more right? But then that just... Doesn't happen because–#God forbid women are valued (or even just. have character arcs of their own at all for the matter.)#Deep sigh. Look I'd stop talking about sexism every episode if every episode stopped being sexist#That said I still find her and Fitzgerald's relationship really cute. When I first watched the series I thought Louisa was in her thirties.#In a way I still like to think she is.#I like Fitgerald post Guild arc. He loves his wife does all the talking and loves sales as much as I do he's about the perfect man#This episode is very 📈📉📉📈📉📈📉📈📈. It always looks like Fitzgerald is acting morally until it's revealed he isn't#And it is quite enjoyable! I like the unpredictable plot twists and I like how at times even a villain's pov is shown. I think Fitzgerald–#is an interesting character. That said I really feel like the exasperated lack of morality is just out of the author's own belief that–#there's no such thing as good and bad at all and everything is ultimately gray. Which I fundamentally don't agree with#I still like Fitzgerald tho. Idk. He's funny and charismatic and loves his wife#The daz/atsu in this episode was so cute 🥺🥺🥺#Akutagawa next episode!! Finally!!!!!!!#random rambles
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HEY noticed The woodcarver from Inscryption could possible have Native American elements inspired for her design so I wanted to do some research before I make a design and outfit for her and stumbled across a fact that seemed pretty cool: that wood carving are primarily done by the guys?? Is this correct?
#I'm trying to do thorough research because I like accurately portraying cultures when doing character designs n stuff#and also cause i rly like learning of different cultures in general gah#but cause I'm not familiar with any of the cultures personally it's hard to find accurate sources#idk i just think it'd be cool to use this fact as an indication that she's trans?#Basically what im saying is -#fELLOW GAYS Where can i find cool real facts and not get got by false facts#i really want to actually learn and not be dumb#please feel free to call my an idiot if this fact is infact false djdj#inscryption#maybe i completely misread her design in general and she's suppose to be from another background#could we discuss would that be okay#also forgot to add that i know all tribes are different in their own way#but this seems to be a thing in northeastern woodland tribes according to some sources#???
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Will you be commenting on the Taylor drama?
I love the way this was worded, like I'm one of the siblings on Succession and the press has cornered me outside my penthouse to ask if I'll be releasing a statement on my family's latest scandal. Hehehe anyways.
Sorry but I just don't understand how anyone is shocked. Truly what has that woman ever done to successfully convince people that this is out of character for her. Like I don't want to diminish anyone's pain or anything but I see all these stans on here and over on Twitter in all this distress, having their very first epiphanies like "Hold on . . . does Taylor . . . suck??" And I kinda just have to chuckle at them cause like bless your hearts babes, but omg catch UP 😭
Lol because 1) she is a severely emotionally stunted person who thinks edgy British "bad boys" are hot like she's 12 years old, 2) she has no true deeply-held moral principles outside of issues that directly affect herself, and 3) truthfully, she seems to be suffering from a serious crisis of identity after the end of the longest and most significant romantic relationship of her life, and in my opinion is pretty clearly desperate to prove something to the world/her ex/herself.
The first reason is cringe but not news to longtime viewers, the second reason is pathetic but also not news (to those who can be honest with themselves), and the third is . . . understandable in some sense, but not pitiable enough to make me willing to humor this insufferable little episode she's having. I wish her luck on this humiliating rebound journey, but she is gonna have to walk that road on her own.
Normally, I always roll my eyes when people make these kinds of jokes, but given the circumstances I feel justified in saying: I can't wait to hear the breakup song about him, sis 🤡
#the great thing about disliking your own fave is that they simply do not have the power to disappoint you lol#like her stans (at least those who arent complete sycophants—which sadly is not most) are breaking down over Babys 1st Cognitive Dissonance#meanwhile im just over here chilling lol#ive also just NEVER been particularly invested in her personal life anyways so im gucci on that front too#i didnt even realize specific songs were about specific celebrity exes until *several* years into listening to her music#thats how unplugged i am lol#she is unusually extremely visible in the collective conscious right now cause of the tour and this insufferable PR blitz#but the absolute best thing for me is when she disappears and i dont have to perceive her -- the actual person -- outside of her music#and then it can just be me and my lifelong companion the fictional character “taylor swift” (c)(r)(tm)#so personally the only real threat this hangs over my head is the thought she might put him on an album#like that does strike real terror in my heart im ngl#ESPECIALLY any of the rerecords oh my god#and given the way hes been tailing her in and out of that damn studio . . . its not looking good for me kids 🥴#i cant believe she would be that dumb after making the same mistake with joe on folklore#cause even tho now she has to suffer the indignity of sharing a grammy with her ex (LMAO)#at least we can understand that at the time she thought they were in it for life#but if she pulls that shit again with a REBOUND??? just to like stick it to joe or further delude herself or whatever?#idk im gonna need interpol or somebody to step in and do something drastic like this is a cry for help#did you guys see that euphoria meme someone made about her deranged “ive never been happier!!!!” speech the other day?#it was SO funny ill go find it
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i am thinking about how fucked up my mom made me and just when i was getting over that how fucked up she made me and just when i was getting over that the pandemic started and irreversible harm was done to my psyche
#xenon screams#vent#my mom wouldn't let me go outside#strangers are going to come and slash you#now idk what the fuck slashing is but it sounds terrifying as hell. and i was 4. so i believed her#so i played inside. only talked to my friends at school. couldn't relate to them. only had webkinz and a sketchbook to keep me company#i probably would've gone completely insane if I weren't an eldest sibling#new school 4th grade. it's nice. enter 5th grade#when i tell you she did irreversible harm to my social developemt i mean she was so annoying and clingy that i got avpd#she's the reason why i started having homicidal thoughts#anyway 9th grade. school cares more about me than my parents. hospital. i started Lexapro n shit#therapy is nice. i made friends at the hospital. i even made a friend at school. i hope they're doing ok#im finally allowed to go outside and do things!#the next year is 2020#maybe i should just kill someone and go to jail. that way id be able to meet people#fuck dude right before the pandemic started i was in the esports club. smash ultimate was about a year old. i was the “only girl'' there#i was about to be a real person with life experiences and social skills#i almost made friends
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Oh my god I was NOT expecting to leave the Sun & Foxy fake date ep. mildly shipping Puppet and Foxy?? Help when I clicked on it I was kinda thinking “oh. More fake kidscove stuff. That’s always fun :)” but then everything happened and???????????? Huh??????? Like I don’t really ever ship TSBS characters just cuz it feels weird to me but?? Oh my god
#HELP???#I don’t know how to feel#like the whole Puppet Bodypillow situation is very 🤨 on Monty’s part obviously and kinda very weird#BUT#but but.#Puppet what was that reaction when Foxy kept it??#like Foxy was being completely normal about it. he took it because well Why Not and to maybe sell as a ‘collectors item’#then YOU made it weird#I don’t. hm#is Puppet catching feelings for Foxy??#like. there is NO WAY they included over half an episode of JUST the two of them for. nothing#like Monty at the end was even like ‘🤨hey. hey buddy why are you. Being Like This? Hm?’#I. I don’t know to me personality it honestly kinda seems like it. could work??#like it just felt so REAL to me when they were in Puppet’s new apartment and like. Foxy knew EXACTLY what Puppet would want#and he got EXACTLY what Puppet would want. and you could see how happy Puppet was they were just trying to act not excited#“I like. Couches. I like comfortable couches.’’ and ‘You have a very comfortable couch’ like??? excuses to just. be in Foxy’s house more???#I am reading waaaaaaaaaaaay too much into this but CMON. PUPPET YOU WERE NOT NORMAL ABOUT ANY OF THIS BUT WHY??? PUPPET.#and FOXY?? FOXY YOU ARE POOR. Foxy the most recurring thing about you is that You Need More Money. and then you.#spend MILLIONS of dollars on an apartment for Puppet???? adhdjfjskdjdhagfjskfsjd#like. going back to Puppet. she even EXCPLICITY made some romance-related comments regarding Foxy and?? I don’t know. I don’t knowwww#IS SHE catching feelings?? IS she?? I just. that felt like Something. their entire interaction the whole time felt like Something.#puppet x foxy#(kind of)#mgafs#mgafs puppet#mgafs foxy#i rambled a bit#THAT JUST. chat I am TELLING YOU there is SOMETHING. there is something. I really hope we expand on this because PLEASE. please#it just. as a Ship it feels soft and comfy?? like a comfort ship?? idk I just really hope they expand on this#if they don’t I’ll live. I’ll just be Silly in my head and imagine it being real. BUT IF THEY DO. ILL NEVER BE NORMAL AGAIN
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relapsed thinking about eriklorna again. fucked up fucked up fucked up
#daddaughter about a questionable father and a very angry daughter who are also mirror images of each other is so real to me#his favorite daughter... his youngest daughter...#the thing with the two of them to me(tm) is that wanda&pietro are such a unit(tm) that erik and lorna will always be left behind#lorna and pietro are very close but she'll never escape the wanda&pietro(tm) yknow#once wanda is there it's her her and only her#similarly erik has fucked up w the twins obvi but even if he didn't it'd still be wanda&pietro and then everyone else#it's fascinating.#i think she's his favorite bcuz of that but also bcuz she has his powers which means she understands(tm)#aka they both have that vague canonical magnetic mutation disorder that's just bipolar#and she's also the one he respects the most out of his children historically (even when he uses her like he does everyone)#<- which is hilarious bcuz then leah williams came along and ummmm. yeah#the thing about the leah williams eriklorna dynamic is that canonically it's bad and completely inaccurate to their histories together#BUT it's also really hot to me personally. which is a dilemma#dad who tries to mold his daughter into the perfect little woman... the pressure of their 'legacy' and his being overbearing just leading#to her rebelling... it's great idk.#but also not great bcuz this woman doesn't read comics. so i'm permamently stuck flipflopping#which eriklorna dynamic i like the most lol#like... do i listen to my head or do i listen to my pussy... so complicated smh#txt#don't even get me started on ultimate eriklorna i will never shut up about it
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