#she's so brave for this bc he has the energy of those guys who think washing their ass is gay đ
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Did Margaret and Denis share a room? They seem like such a formal couple I can only imagine them having, like, tea together đ
I guess so? I have no reason to believe they didn't... đ€ from what I've seen of the floor plans, I believe there are two bedrooms though, or she could've kicked him onto the couch or something lol
Even if they shared a room, they might not have shared a bed though? Not that this proves anything but @margaret-hilda-thatcher do you still have that pic of the Brighton hotel room showing two beds?
#she's so brave for this bc he has the energy of those guys who think washing their ass is gay đ#he also has âfucking bathing in cologneâ energy#source: vibes đ#margaret thatcher
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Swipe Right 04 | Patch Notes | JJK (M)
Rating: M (Explicit 18+)
Pairings: Jungkook x Reader, brot7 x friendship
Genre: E2L, fluff, angst, humor, [eventual] smut, PersonalTrainer!Jungkook, fuckboy!Jungkook, Nerd!Jungkook, Nerd/IT!Reader
Word Count: 15.1K
Last time on SR03: You joined a gym to increase your confidence and things progressed the way you want with your tinder match. You ended up in an unlikely competition with your friends when you went new bar together, leading to some unexpected conversations and shenanigans.
CW & Other Tags:Â Drinking, anxiety/panic attack mentions, muscle tearing injury mention, fuckboy Jungkook, pining, flirting, pick-up lines, sexual tension, Joonie is still Y/Nâs best boi, soft Jungkook
Series: Activate your SIMCard
Fic: Swipe Right (4/?- Ongoing)
Do not repost.
â± ââââââ {.â
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Whenâs the last time you felt as good as you do right now? Jungkook has pretty much stopped bothering you since that night at Seesaw, your date with Jason went well, and youâve been sticking to your early morning workouts. You definitely donât push yourself as much as trainer Hwasa, and you know you should really take advantage of the free trial, but it was overwhelming to take in so much at once and the session made you sore all over for days.
At least your stamina seems to be improving and youâve discovered post-workout endorphins are real. Tonight is your second date with Jason, a date youâve uncharacteristically elected to host at your apartment. You can place some blame on those endorphins for your boldness, with pining and disappointment composing the rest of it.
While your first date ended without a kiss, there was enough flirting to keep you hopeful. Neither of you were brave enough to do anything about it then, but youâve mentally coached yourself into pretending like you have an unbreakable spine with nerves of steel. Meeting him only solidified your attraction, and youâve resolved to take the lead, even though you feel like you have no idea what youâre doing.
Itâs not like you often make the first move, but your confidence in him to do so has waned. Youâve been talking and playing games together online for months without any physical touch. Despite how heâs said he likes you and wants to see you again, youâd still be waiting if you didnât suggest today.
Youâre determined to show him what heâs missing by being a recluse. Thatâs why youâve picked out the sluttiest clothes and the strappiest heels you own, decorated your face with expensive makeup, and even styled your hair instead of just letting it do whatever it wants for the day. You check yourself out in the full-length mirror on your bedroom door for the millionth time and pull down on the hem of your dress like it will somehow magically grow longer.
You donât need the heels; no part of the night calls for them. Youâre going to be sitting on the couch with him. If youâre lucky youâll even move it to the bedroom you spent so much time cleaning. But theyâre cute and they make you feel sexy, so youâre going to keep them on until heâs peeling you out of your dress.
Nerves bubble in your stomach, but you have to pretend like theyâre not there or youâll fixate on how hard youâre trying to be confident and cool. Youâll fall apart when itâs obvious to Jason how hard youâre pretending to be everything you arenât. Checking your phone doesnât help; itâs almost time.
Taking a deep breath, you pace through the confines of your apartment as you wait, and answer group texts from Jennie and Namjoon. You offer up a selfie, hoping any compliments will build your confidence enough to stave off the anxiety in your gut. A few devil emojis later, some keysmashing, and more than a couple hamfisted compliments from Namjoon, your ego is adequately inflated but you can always use more hyping. Maybe you should send it to Jimin to fish for more compliments? Heâd indulge you for sure.
Instead you flop on the couch and open Tinder. According to Jennie, Jason is stringing you along; itâs been months, but you hate to admit that she has a point. So you donât. Sheâs been telling you for a while now that she thinks you should pursue other suitors. While you object to her assumptions, she has more experience with this kind of stuff. Itâs not exactly something you want to believe, not when youâve put in so much effort for literal months.
You want to believe in Jason being awkward and dorky and thatâs why itâs taken so long for the two of you to hook up. Heâs shy and super introverted, but so are you. So why are you the only one trying to make things happen? You want to believe, but at this point youâre uncertain enough to heed Jennieâs advice and keep swiping any time you find yourself in a situation where youâre waiting on him. Like now.
You have your reservations about swiping while you wait for your date to begin, but you can practically hear Jennie cheering you on. Heâs late anyway, and it will keep you busy until he arrives. You open the discovery tab and swipe left on a couple incomplete profiles. Most of the guys on here donât put in any effort. How are you supposed to want to give any of them a chance when you donât even get a tiny snapshot of who they are?
When you pass on yet another fish pic profile, a blue frame appears around the next guy in line. It takes a moment for your brain to register the name along with the duck-faced photo as someone familiar.
[Jungkook said: Your legs remind me of oreos đ„Ž wanna know why?]
How fucking dare he? You match with the intent to ream him out and leave.
You: I told you not to fucking find me on here
It takes only a few seconds before you see the dots move on his end, like he was waiting for the moment you would answer, and it keeps you tethered to the conversation.
Jungkook: Princess!! I couldnât help myself how are you
Jungkook: Surprised you didnât block me
You: Donât worry Iâm gonna
Jungkook: itâs bc you wanna know huh
You: ???
Jungkook: Your legs
Jungkook: Like oreos
Jungkook: I wanna split them n lick the cream from the center đ
Electricity rumbles in your gut, carrying heat and a surge of excitement to your cunt that threatens to flood your panties. You swallow hard and squeeze your thighs together as you stare at the screen. Embarrassed by the response his antics elicit, you scramble to formulate a coherent thought.
You: I wish I could unread đ€ą
Jungkook: Aw but thatâs one of my favorites
Jungkook: Just like you đ
You: đ
You: I hate you so much
Jungkook: So much that you matched with me?
You stare at the message like a clever response will come to you and when it doesnât you bite your lip. Heâs got a point. Havenât you learned your lesson not to encourage him? Your eyes scan the top of your phone for any notifications from Jason. Nothing. At least this is keeping you distracted. Thatâs what you tell yourself.
Jungkook: Youâre still here which means đ
You: It means Iâm tired
Jungkook: Of?
You pause for a moment. Namjoon and Jennie canât know how anxious you are about Jason. Itâs the guyâs last strike with them and he hasnât even met them yet. Jungkook, an impartial third party, might be able to lend an ear. As much as you donât care what he thinks, you need an outlet for the anxiety in your chest. You start to draft a word-vomit. Jason has been so hesitant to see you in person again and now heâs late. Maybe if you just put it out there to someone youâll feel better.
Jungkook: If you need to sleep how about a massage?
Jungkook: Iâm good with my fingers đ„Ž
Stupid. In what universe could you confide in Jungkook? Deleting your word-vomit before you can send it, you start to type something else, but your thumb accidentally taps enter at the exact wrong moment.
You: You know what? I want you
FUCK. Goddamn you, sausage fingers.
You scramble to rewrite the sentence but Jungkook is quicker. He has to know it was an accident, but youâre still fucking mortified.
Jungkook: đ
Jungkook: My place
Jungkook: Ten minutes
You: *to stay off my profile
Jungkook: đđ?
You: YOU KNOW I DIDNâT MEAN THAT
You: đ€ąđ€ąđ€ą
Jungkook: đ©
Jungkook: Now youâre just playing games with me princess
Jungkook: Canât say I mind just fuck me up đ„Ž
You: Donât you have a princess to fuck in another castle? Maybe she can stroke your tiny ego
Jungkook: Ouch felt that from here
He goes quiet and you close the conversation out. Setting the phone down on the cushion beside you lasts all of two seconds. When your phone buzzes twice, you know better than to answer, yet you feel compelled to look.
Jungkook: Hey quick question
Jungkook: Is this the most youâve used the app to talk with someone you like? đ»
Just like that you unmatch with him and take a moment to seethe. Distraction or no, heâs not worth the mental energy. He always seems to draw you in like a pretty little thirst trap and drain you of your sanity. Not engaging is the safest option so why do you always end up doing so? Maybe itâs that shitty little part of you that gets excited any time he shows you attention.
Thereâs a gullible girl within you; she sets your pulse on fire when he feigns even the slightest interest, fills your head with wind when he brushes against you, and floods your eyes with tears when he walks away. Still, she wants him to look at you, even if it means heâs really looking through you. You hate her. Why canât she learn that you deserve better?
You check the time again and wince. Jason is really late now. Not even a text. Or a phone call. Maybe itâs traffic?
Try to relax. Nothing bad is going to happen. Youâre going to have fun tonight.
You start up a game to take your mind off the options available to explain his absence. When youâre invested in a game you often lose track of time, but tonight youâre hyper-aware of every minute that passes. You bite at your freshly painted nails during loading screens, chipping the red from their edges. Sounding casual is difficult when youâre worried, but you attempt it anyway via text. Itâs ten more agonizing minutes of waiting before your phone buzzes with an answer.
The controller drops to your lap and immediately tears begin to sprinkle your thighs with the manifestation of your heartache.
He forgot.
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An earthy scent fills Namjoonâs apartment as he carefully transfers the last of his plants to a bigger pot, filling in the edges of its roots with fresh soil and patting the edges down with care. His plants have needed this, maybe even more than he needs the mini hangout that will soon follow. The kitchen table is covered in dirt, but at least heâs almost done.
Itâs not his fault Jungkook showed up earlier than expected. At least heâs quiet now. Itâs been a while, but heâs finally stopped asking about how much longer it will take, so he must either be invested in the show he put on or asleep on the couch.
âAlmost done,â Namjoon loudly announces. âCan you text Tae?â
âKay.â Jungkook yawns as he stands and heads towards the bathroom. âJin was already cooking when I left so it should be ready soon.â
âGood. Iâm hungry,â Namjoon says, carefully transporting the plant to the desk in his bedroom.
As heâs on his way to clean up the mess on the table thereâs a soft rapid knock at the front door. The moment he opens it and finds you standing before him, he knows something is wrong. Even the ratty hoodie covering your shoulders canât hide the effort youâve obviously put into your appearance tonight. While your makeup seems to have fared rather well, your eyes are red and your cheeks are puffy. His mind automatically assumes the worst about your second date and his jaw tightens.
âWhat happened? Did he hurt you?â
âHe never showed.â You throw your arms around him and openly sob.
âOh, Y/NâŠâ His arms are around you in an instant, hugging you close while keeping his dirty fingers at bay.
You press your cheek against his chest, letting the tears fall freely. âIâm sorry. I know you probably have plans tonight, but I wanted to stop hereââ You choke out a loud sob and wipe your nose with your sleeve as you look down at the floor. âI didnât want to drive upset but you werenât answering and I justââ
âShit. Exam today. I left it on silent.â He pats his pocket to make sure itâs still there, wiping as much dirt as he can on his jeans before placing his hands on your shoulders. âHey, itâs okay. Deep breaths.â
Jungkook emerges from the bathroom quietly with a furrowed brow and pursed lips. Did he hear your voice or is it his imagination? Unsure if youâre some wishful remnant of earlier texts, he peeks around the corner.
Heels: black, strappy heels with a velvety smooth red undersole. Has he ever seen you in heels? If he has, itâs never been something as flashy as these. His gaze travels up the smooth, exposed skin of your legs until it hits the hem of a skirt. The dark fabric seems a little short; it clings to your thighs, riding up as you embrace his friend. Itâs hard not to notice how well it accents the curve of your hips and more importantly: your ass. Heâs definitely never seen you in something so revealing, not even on nights where youâve joined them for dancing.
He pauses for a fraction of a second, eyes trained on the swell of your ass before moving up to find the disappointing sight of your favorite hoodie barring much else from view. Namjoonâs arms outline your shape, but the places his hands rest are far too respectable to glean much else other than simple blueprints.
With his dick leading his steps, Jungkook opens his mouth to announce his presence with a joke. He means to selfishly steal a glimpse of your entire ensemble with some snarky comment but you choke out a sob and his stomach lurches to form a whirlpool of apprehension. His mouth remains open, but his words are swallowed back into the dark swirling pit that now wrenches his gut in circles.
Namjoon looks up just in time to read the confusion and shock on his features. He shakes his head and cups yours against his chest, wordlessly signaling Jungkook to keep quiet.
âIs there anything I can do? Do you wanna talk about it?â Namjoon asks, hoping you donât see the man behind you slowly backing away like heâs just approached a rabid animal.
Youâre sobbing. Why are you sobbing? What happened? Was it what he said before you unmatched? Jungkook tiptoes back into the kitchen without a word. He leans against the counter and shoves his hands in his coat pockets, trying to piece everything together. Did he cause this?
You screw your eyes shut to try to keep the tears inside. Itâs no use. They always seem to find a way out. âHe didnât show up and when I texted him, he⊠he said he forgot."
âWhat?"
âI thought it would be good after the arcade date, you know? Like, good chemistry. Heâs weird. I like him! He seemed interested and we made these plans and he justââ you choke out another loud sob. âGod. Am I really so fucking forgettable?â
You wanted your friends to be wrong so badly that you ignored the fact that itâs been like pulling teeth trying to get Jason to meet up again. For him to forget completely is like a kick to the face that leaves all the teeth intact, maybe a little bloody, but stubbornly intact.
âY/N, no. Itâs not your fault. You deserve better than this fucking guy.â
Jungkook swallows hard. This definitely doesnât feel like a conversation he should be hearing, but itâs loud enough to carry through the entire apartment. Kitchen, bedroom, or bathroom: his options are limited, but he knows thereâs nowhere to go to pretend like he canât hear it. Itâs not like he can just walk out the front door now.
âDo I? Itâs seems like a fucking pattern, Joon. I fall for people so easily and they always make me feel like an idiot for trying. Donghyun. Seojun. Jason. Jungkook⊠It doesnât matter. No one fucking wants me.â
Jungkook tenses. He may not know all the names on your list, but his is among them all the same. Has he really hurt you so much?
âHey⊠Donât think like that,â Namjoon says, his voice soft as he rubs your back. âYou know your worth, and itâs not measured by how well someone else can see it.â
Every time you think youâre done crying, fresh tears begin to roll down your cheeks. âIâm tired, Joonie.â
âI know. Iâm sorry. We'll get you home."
As you step back to look at him your ankle rolls, and you begin to fall. Hearing the scuffle, Jungkook winces and peeks around the corner. Namjoon has a good enough grip to stop you from fully tumbling to the floor, but youâre definitely not stable by any means.
Although you now face Jungkook, youâre too distracted by your ankle to notice the extra pair of eyes on you. He allows himself to stupidly linger within your line of sight, raking his gaze across your form to take in the details of your attire, right down to your choice of earrings. Even with a red nose and puffy, smudged eyes, the time youâve spent on your appearance remains evident.
You did all that for some guy who didnât even show? If thatâs how you dress for your dates then his innocent perception of you is completely wrong. What kind of moron would pass up the opportunity to peel you out of that dress and dive into your cunt? You look incredible. What the fuck.
"God. Shit. Fuck! Fucking stupid heels!â You huff out your exasperation and let a small pitiful laugh pass your lips as you right your stance with Namjoonâs help. âYou know, I spent hours getting ready and now I just look stupid. I feel stupid.â
âYou donât. Youâre not,â Namjoon insists, his palm squeezing your shoulder.
âNamjoon, I shaved my entire body. Do you know how long that took?â
Jungkook forces himself to withdraw into the kitchen. If you see him now you might murder him. He purses his lips into a thin line and tightens his grip around his arms. In an instant he imagines hiking your dress above your hips and parting your legs so he might brush his cheek against the smooth expanse of your thigh all the way to your core. Are your panties as slutty as your dress? Are they cute? Lacy? Plain?
âGeeksquadâŠâ Namjoon sighs loudly. âI really donât need to knowâ Hold up. Wasnât this the second date?â
âAre you slutshaming me?â The tired laugh that follows sounds more like you, but it still hurts his heart. âIâm stepping up my game.â
âNah. You do you,â he says, a soft smile on his lips thatâs obviously full of pity. âYou want to stay and get some food? I think I have some sweats you can change into.â
Tires screech in Jungkookâs mind. Is he going to be trapped here for the night? Without dinner? What kind of karmic torture is the universe putting him through?
âNo, Iâm sorry,â you sniffle, wiping your face with the sleeves of your sweater. âJennie wants me to come over but IâI didnât think I could make it with having a full meltdown. You were on the way.â
âNo need to apologize.â He pulls you into another tight hug. âDo you want me to walk you back to your car?â
âNo, no itâs fine. Iâm right in front. Thanks, Joonie.â Your phone begins to buzz in your hoodie pocket. You pull back and wave it at him, already on your way to the door. âItâs like she knew. Iâll talk to her on the way. Thank you for listening to me cry for the millionth time.â
âAlways. Text me when you get there, okay?â
âWill do, mom,â you tease with a soft laugh.
âZip up your hoodie.â
You grimace at him with narrowed eyes but heed his advice on your way out. You also pull your skirt down as far down your thighs as it will reach. Men are gross and you trust virtually none of them.
Jungkook waits until he hears the click of the lock on the door to breathe a loud sigh of relief. Namjoon rubs the back of his neck and stares at the door. He worries about you.
âYikes. That Jason guy is a dick huh?â
Namjoon swivels on his heels and rounds on his friend. âLike you were so much better to her?â
Jungkook casts his gaze to the floor. âI didnât stand her up.â
Even he knows that argument is flimsy.
âGuk.â
âIt was always just a joke.â
âItâs not though. She really liked you, man. I asked you not to mess with her.â
Memories have warped Jungkook into a jaded man: untrusting although not uncaring. Guilt is the only thing churning in his stomach as he thinks of you. He never expected to genuinely hurt you. Somehow things twisted into a gnarled mess that never really felt like more than a playful game of tug-of-war. But these kinds of games only work when the people involved know that theyâre playing. Itâs shitty when one pulls another into the mud when theyâve never agreed to participate.
Faced with the reality of how you consider him now, it dawns on him that heâs dragged you into the mud face-first without even the slightest resistance. Youâve stood up and youâve even yanked the rope in retaliation, but you never shouldâve been in the mud in the first place. Regardless of his own emotional ineptitude, he knows you never deserved that humiliation. No one does. The weight of his actions sits heavy in his gut.
Still he tries to justify himself. âAll I do now is make pass after pass and sheâs the one who turns me down.â
âYou said it earlier yourself,â Namjoon sneers, irritated by his friendâs immaturity. âItâs always a joke. Youâre never serious and she knows it. Look, you donât have to like her back. Sheâs my friend and so are you. Just donât lead her on and stop with the mind games. Be honest with her. The least you can do is apologize for being a dick.â
âThatâsâ I feel like⊠I donât know how.â
Jungkook canât bring himself to tell him of your conversation earlier tonight. It just adds to the guilt piling on his conscience. Namjoon used his own words against him and the worst part is it makes sense. Itâs so much easier when itâs a stranger at a bar or a random encounter at a club, but youâre neither of those things. He lumped you into that category all the same.
Namjoon clicks his tongue and puts an arm around Jungkookâs back. âStarting with âIâm sorryâ can go a long way. Sheâs a good person and I know you guys can get along. Things were going well until you made that bet, right?â
Jungkook opens his mouth to speak and then closes it. âMmm.â
âNot every girl is a Jiseo, Jungkook.â
âYeah.â
âI thinkâŠâ Namjoon sighs and shakes his head. âI donât know. Can you try to just... tone it down? Maybe try to patch things up?â
âOkay.â Jungkookâs brow furrows and he chews his lip as he mulls over Namjoonâs words. He reaches into his coat pocket and pulls out his keys. âYou ready?â
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Your head dips forward as your fingers glide across the keys. It's hard to concentrate on your task when you're this distracted by your own thoughts. You stare at the monitor with furrowed brows. Namjoon grabs the back of your chair and leans forward to tower over you.
"Went that well, huh? Did he blow the second chance he didnât deserve?"
The motion jerks you backwards and you grip the armrests of the chair to steady yourself. Despite your best attempt to curb the irritation in your expression, your frustration remains apparent. You sit back and tilt your head up to look at him, trying to think of something to say, some excuse to not reinforce the "told you so" waiting in your future, not after you showed up at his apartment sounding like a dying whale a few days before. When no ideas come to your immediate aid, you click your tongue and let out a heavy sigh as you turn your attention back to the screen.
"Geeksquad," he presses. "Talk to me."
You exhale through your nose and briefly purse your lips before obliging his plea. The words are quick and quiet so you don't run the risk of bawling your eyes out again. "He canceled.â
Namjoon steps back and the pressure on your seat is gone. He places a large palm on your shoulder. "I'm sorry. Do you want to talk about it?"
Despite wanting to give the opposite answer, you shake your head. You don't trust yourself to speak, but you'd like to tell him. He's clever and you know he'll likely find a way to get it out of you with minimal effort anyway. Still, you donât think you can manage the words without crying like a baby and you donât want to do that when the morning has only just begun. Silence falls between the two of you as he gives you time to decide if you want to open up.
After a moment of tapping away you finally give in. You know youâll feel better after you cry.
"He said he had to stay behind and help do clean-up for the party he was at. And thatâs nice and all, but we had plans. I feel crazy. I should be glad that heâs so kind, right? Like that shows heâs a good person, right?â Your voice has cracked but it hasnât quite broken.
He sighs and flops in the chair on the other side of his desk. âY/N⊠I think youâre asking me for answers you already know.â
âBut tell me anyway,â you press, tears welling in your eyes. âOur first date went so well. So why-y-â Your voice breaks.
âHey.â He reaches across the desk and brushes his fingers against your arm. âI know you want me to help you make excuses for him... But you deserve someone who values your time. Clearly heâs just looking to waste it.â
âButââ
âY/N, you donât need someone like that. If this is what heâs like before youâre even together, then what kind of effort is he really going to put into a potential relationship? Not enough. There are so many people out there, people that would trip over themselves just to have the chance to be with you. I know you donât want to hear it, but I think itâs a mistake that you even gave him another shot. He blew it. Twice. Delete his number. Forget him.â
âI know,â you croak. Tears fall from your eyes and you quickly swipe them away, focusing on the task at hand.
Namjoon is right and you know it, but youâre kind of irritated about it. You know itâs not really him youâre mad at, but Namjoon is a good enough placeholder while you try to sort through your hurt feelings.
You muster your most monotone voice as you stand. âI updated your drivers and deleted any cached files that might have been causing issues. Is that all?â
âDonât be mad at me,â he pleads, rising to block your path as you step towards the door. âYou have a big heart and I hate seeing it stepped on.â
In a matter of seconds you melt into his embrace and bury your face into his shirt. âI hate how fast I like people.â
âI know.â He pets the back of your head softly and squishes you against his chest. âItâs gonna be okay. How about udon later? My treat?â
âWith beef?â you ask with a sniffle.
âWith beef,â he agrees.
âGyoza?â
âMhm.â
âAnd takoyaki?â
â...Youâre pushing it.â
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You slide the appetizer tray across the table towards Namjoon. âHere.â
He shovels a dumping into his mouth right before he speaks. âI could eat this every day for the rest of my life.â
âCould you afford it though?â you tease, taking a sip from the bottle of sakĂ© and crinkling your nose at it before passing it to him.
âNot if youâre joining me,â he snorts. âYouâre supposed to pour it.â
âNo, thanks.â You push the tiny glass full of liquid back towards him.
"Wow. Are you guys on a date?"
You know the source of the voice before you even crane your neck to see Jungkook.
"Pfft." Namjoon waves the question off with a deep laugh.
Despite finding the scenario of ever dating Namjoon absolutely absurd, you canât help but feel a little insulted by the volume of his laughter. Namjoonâs hangout night was supposed to take your mind off of how unwanted Jason made you feel. Instead, the pit of insecurity within your stomach grows into a thick, tangled brush of hostility. Is being seen with you really so laughable?
âWhy would we be?â you snap, turning your attention back to your bowl.
Heat settles in your face and you purse your lips, not daring to look at either of them. You try to wrangle some noodles to shovel in your mouth before you can say something stupid. Their eyes are on you. Jungkook is definitely confused but not alarmed by your hostility. Itâs something heâs grown accustomed to. But Namjoon knows when he hurts your feelings, every time, and itâs easy enough to disarm your irritability.
âSheâs way too good for a mess like me,â Namjoon says with a light laugh.
âWhy are you here?â you ask, tone already softer than before.
"Post-work snackie," he answers, all too cheery for your sour mood. âCame for the noods. Mind if I join?â
He looks to the rosy-cheeked Namjoon for his answer, as you set your hoodie and purse down in the space beside you to give him yours. Namjoon betrays you by scooting over to make room on his side of the booth. Youâd mentioned to him before that youâd eventually like to fix things with Jungkook, to somehow make steps for peace. But you only have so much mental energy left to give today.
âNot tonight, Jungkook,â you plead with a sigh.
The frustration in that puff of breath is enough to make Jungkook hesitate. He blinks a few times, wide-eyed. âWhat?â
âI just⊠canât handle your bullshit tonight.â
Jungkook tries to break the uncomfortable tension with a grin. âNo bullshit tonight. Promise.â
âNo.â Your answer is firm and somehow so fragile that it makes both men worry their brows in the same fashion. âPlease, just go away.â
He shoves his hands in the pockets of his leather jacket and takes a few steps back. He doesnât know what to make of your demeanor, but he can put enough together to know the basics. Youâre upset, maybe not at him for once. However unlikely, thatâd be a blessing. Maybe youâre still upset about that guy that stood you up a few days ago. If thatâs the case, he probably shouldnât stick around and risk letting on how much he knows about that.
He tongues the side of his cheek and nods, forcing a smile to his face. âAlright. Iâll just order it to go. Planned on that anyway. Catch you later.â
Guilt wracks your nerves as he walks away. The moment you look back at Namjoon, youâre faced with a wall of disappointment that threatens to topple the scale of decision-making in Jungkookâs favor.
âYouâre judging me for that,â you mumble. The noodles between your chopsticks slip back into the broth.
âLittle bit,â Namjoon admits, watching his friend sulk over to the entrance waitstaff. âYou know he told me heâs trying to be nicer to you.â
âWhat? When?â
âThe other day. We hung out.â
He keeps his answers short and ambiguous, hoping your curiosity has been piqued. Maybe this is the golden opportunity heâs been hoping for to patch your friendship.
âWas this before or after he harassed me on Tinder?â
Namjoonâs heart sinks into his butt. Of course Jungkook would make reconciliation harder than it needs to be. âWhen did he do that?â
âThat night I showed up at your apartment like a big crybaby.â
âI went over his place for dinner after you left. Jin wanted to try a new recipe out on us.â That seems to at least make you pause.
âYou guys talked about me?â
âYup.â He goes back to chewing his food, knowing heâs got you hooked.
Your incredulous stare does nothing to pull information past his lips. âJoonie. What did you say about me? What did he say?â
âMmm?â He slurps up a long noodle. âA lot of things. But theyâre not really my words to tell.â
âNo one likes clickbait, Joon.â
âLook, all Iâm saying is that he told me that he wants to fix things. If you want specifics, maybe we can invite him to come eat with us. It might be easier for the both of you to talk about it over good food.â
You sigh, seriously considering his words even as you shake your head. âJoon, Iâm already emotionally compromised. I really donât want to cry in front of Jungkook tonight.â
âWhy would you cry? This is a night for good things only. Namjoon-approved and protected. You donât have to talk about anything you donât want to... I just thought it might be nice to make some good memories with good friends.â
You roll your eyes but hold your pinky out for him. âFine. But this is Joonie-Y/N time. Youâre cutting into that allotted time slot, you know that right?â
Namjoon rests his elbow on the table, preparing to pinky swear to whatever youâre about to suggest. âConditions?â
âHe sits next to you, he doesnât make fun of me if I cry, andâŠ. he doesnât get to talk.â
âY/N.â
âFiiiiine. He can talk. But he better be as nice as you say heâs trying to be.â
âWe allowed to talk about Jason?â
âIf it comes upâŠâ you sigh. âYou know, if heâs mean to me and I cry then you have to deal with it.â
He clasps his long pinky around yours. âDeal. But with how all that just went down, you gotta go tell him to come back. He wonât believe me if I do it.â
âDonât let him be mean to me,â you plead, tightening your grip on his pinky and locking eyes with him. âGood vibes only.â
âHe wonât be mean. Good vibes only.â Namjoon nods with a soft smile. âHe really is a good person where it counts, Y/N.â
You push your things aside and force yourself to find Jungkook. Heâs leaning against a wall near the entrance, scrolling through his phone while he waits for his order. You quietly request to your waitress that youâd like his food brought to your table. Sheâs nice enough about it, but your stomach churns regardless. Itâs the anxiety.
You gingerly poke a finger against his shoulder as you approach. âUm. Hey.â
He seems startled at first, but smiles when he realizes itâs you. âHmm?â
You take a deep quiet inhale, trying your best not to get lost in the butterflies his charming smile conjures in your gut. You try to tell yourself itâs anxiety and nothing more. Apologies are hard and scary. Thatâs all.
âIâm⊠sorry for being rude. Iâve had a rough week but I shouldnât take it out on you. Come eat with us, please. Namjoonâs buying anyway.â
His eyes seem to light up with surprise and a warm smile deepens the creases around his eyes and mouth. The hope that these feelings of attraction would evaporate with time is a flame swiftly snuffed out and replaced with a burning heartache that deems denial useless. Even now, pangs of infatuation lurk below your feelings of disdain, breaking the tension of its surface with each beat of your heart.
âItâs okay,â he reassures you. âI shouldnât have invited myself when I saw you guys. I should really get home and shower anyway.â
He looks so clean that youâd assumed heâd already showered. Itâs not like you can smell him from where you stand. Maybe heâs lying, but at least you get the sense itâs coming from a place of politeness.
âJungkook, I want you to come eat with us. Besides Namjoon wants someone to drink sakĂ© with him and I cannot keep doing it.â
âI see.â He offers a small laugh and rubs the back of his neck. âAre you sure? You seemed pretty against it before. What changed?â
âNamjoon told me youâre trying to be less of an asshole to me.â
âDid he?â he licks his lips and tries to hide his pleased smile. âIâm surprised you believe him.â
âHe also promised me I could punch you in the dick if you make me cry,â you lie, completely stone-faced.
If he knows thatâs a falsified statement, he doesnât say anything. He looks past your shoulder to quirk a brow at Namjoon, who appears to be furiously texting at the table. Jungkookâs phone buzzes a few times against his palm and heâs fairly sure he already knows who it is.
âCome on. I already asked them to bring your food to the table.â
He reads Namjoonâs messages as he trails behind you.
NAMJOON: If you seriously want to apologize stick around, make her laugh, just listen when you need to
JUNGKOOK: Donât worry
JUNGKOOK: I got u
Before Namjoon can send a text saying that Jungkook's response has the opposite effect, youâre peeking across the table, trying to get a glance at the screen.
âWhoâs that?â you wonder. Namjoonâs not usually one to be so secretive with his texts.
âHmm?â he raises his eyebrows at you and pours you a shot. âStupid. Donât worry about it.â
âHa. Haha. Ha.â You gesture at your face. âYou say to the girl with anxiety.â
Crinkling your nose at the glass he offers, you slide it across to Jungkook as he settles in next to Namjoon. âHere. Iâm done drinking that stuff tonight.â
He regards it with a quirked brow. Something about your demeanor really has changed, but looking between you and Namjoon does nothing to answer the question of what that may be.
âOkay, so on reddit this guy was reaching. Heâs going on about the symbolism in the red scarfââ
Your eyes gloss over the moment he mentions reddit. Is there anything you care less about than Joonâs favorite modern literary discussion threads?
âGot it. Not worrying about it,â you interrupt, bringing your bowl to your lips to slurp some of the broth.
Jungkook hides his smirk by throwing his head back to drink his shot. Namjoon is a genius. It might be scary if he ever decided to use his intellect for nefarious purposes. Lucky for the universe he uses it to protect others, like a real superhero would.
As the three of you dine together, youâre surprised to find that Jungkook isnât being as annoying as he usually is. In fact, it seems the more he drinks outside of any competitive setting, the more affable he becomes. Maybe thereâs something to Namjoonâs clickbaity words. Heâs almost the person you remember meeting before the Halloween Party, maybe even more pleasant.
Youâre grateful when the two of them start telling embarrassing stories so you can listen and laugh at the way they slur their words and interrupt each other. Laughter makes your heart feel light and full, and brave enough to take the last step to prove to yourself youâre done chasing Jason. As the two men fight over the last piece of gyoza and distract themselves over dessert, you quietly decide to clear your text messages from Jason. Your finger hovers over the delete icon for a second before purging his contact information from your device entirely.
Itâs freeing to not have to worry about what you should send him. Itâs frustrating to have tried so hard for so long and have nothing to show for it, but at least there will be no conversation history to pick apart anymore. It should feel perfect. That will definitely show him, right? You donât have to reflect for more than a couple seconds to reinforce the memory of how little he actually reached out on his own.
He still has your number. The only time he ever called was on your first date. He never texted you unless you spoke first. He probably wonât even notice youâre gone. Heâs probably relieved he wonât have to answer you anymore. He probably thinks youâre desperate for trying for so long. You donât realize how well you wear your anxiety.
When you look up Jungkook is watching you while he chews with his mouth wide open. âHey, why do-â He hiccups and swallows. âWhy do you look so sad? You should have some ice cream.â
He scans the table for something to offer you, but he canât seem to find what heâs looking for in his drunken stupor. After a few seconds his eyes finally land on his own plate where the other half of his red-bean cake sits.
âDo you want my taiyaki?â He holds the tail end of the fish-shaped cake out to you. âItâs really good!â
You canât help but laugh at the unexpected sweet absurdity of the night. âJungkook, I donât want your half-eaten cake.â
He frowns and looks at the pastry. âIs it because I bit it? Iâll break off that part for you if you donât want your mouth to touch that.â
Although Jungkook definitely is more drunk than Namjoon right now, the older man canât help but be amazed by how well this is going. He loads up on green tea ice cream and digs his spoon in it. He shouldnât have been so worried. Jungkook can put away the act when he wants to, especially once alcohol is involved and thereâs nothing to prove. You guys are actually getting along. What a relief.
âNo, really itâs okay.â You laugh.
Jungkook is already breaking the pastry apart in his hand, watching as it crumbles to pieces on his plate. He blinks a couple times and closes his mouth in a frown.
âI thought that would work.â He sounds utterly defeated.
The waitress walks over just in time to watch Namjoon stick a heaping spoonful of wasabi in his mouth. You're too busy laughing at Jungkook's forlorn expression to notice the way Namjoon's eyes water. His eyes drop to the ice cream he thought he shoveled into his mouth. Right next to the pristine, untouched scoop of green tea ice cream, he finds his spoon resting in the hunk of wasabi adjacent to it. He should really pay attention more. He pushes against Jungkook's side and motions that he needs to get up. The younger man spares a glance his way but Namjoon waves him off while mumbling something about the bathroom.
The waitress tries to keep her composure and looks between the pair of you. "How is everything?"
"Great! Could you please bring us some water?" you ask in your sweetest voice, realizing the two men with you should at least try to start sobering up.
You expected to have Namjoon crashing on your couch on a Friday night, or at least be dropping him off down the hall at Hobiâs place. Jungkook was not part of the plan, but you canât exactly let him drive home inebriated. You know heâs not your responsibility but youâd feel guilty making him call for a ride home when youâre perfectly capable.
Although you hate to admit it, youâve had fun tonight. If youâre being honest with yourself youâd like to see what heâs like without Namjoon nearby to police his moves. Heâs been nice enough, but you want to know for sure this isnât an act. You want to ask him if heâs made another bet, or playing some game since he hasnât hit on you all night. Before you can get your line of questions in order, Jungkook turns to the server with large, pleading eyes.
"Oh! Can you bring some more dessert, please?"
He may be a grown ass man capable of charming the pants off of women everywhere, but right now he is little more than a child begging for seconds. Regardless of everything he's done, your heart softens, endeared and embarrassed by his drunken request to your server.
The waitress nods. "Sure, what would you like?"
His eyes fall to you for an answer. "What do you like?"
You blink at him. "Me? I thought this was for you."
He nods. "Mm. We can split it."
"Um, how about... tempura?"
"Banana?"
Jungkookâs voice is full of anticipation and his upturned eyebrows seem to bargain for agreement. Itâs so hard to believe this is the same man who has been so cold to you for so long when he seems so open and warm now. You remind yourself itâs probably the alcohol. Itâs probably some secret promise to Namjoon. Some bet with Hobi. Some game heâs playing. Itâs probably anything other than what your dumb crush-stupefied heart wants it to be.
The waitress looks to you for approval and you give a nod. "Sure. Banana tempura."
The waitress awkwardly smiles as she gathers the empty platters and gives you a chance to break away from his endearingly drunken face. He smiles across the table at you and wrings his hands while you pick up your phone to check on those nonexistent messages. Maybe if you distract yourself enough you can ignore the feelings that are catching up to you tonight.
âThank you for inviting me back over,â he says, reaching to the nearly empty bottle of sakĂ© to pour himself another shot. âIâve... been wanting to talk to you."
"Iâm surprised you didnât blow up my phone.â Itâs supposed to be a joke, but thereâs a harshness in your tone that exposes a venomous bite beneath it.
He downs the shot and plants his elbows on the table, leaning forward on them. "I wanted to say it to your face."
âOh, really?â
You donât allow yourself to entertain the idea that heâs about to say anything groundbreaking, but you look away from your phone to meet those dark, twinkling eyes. Suddenly thereâs hope in your gut. Youâre desperate to put some distance between the feelings jumping to the surface.
âIâve been a dick.â
âNo shit.â
Though the fog of alcohol consumes his apology, his eyes focus on you with clarity. âIâm sorry.â
How long have you waited to hear those words? You never really thought about what you might say in response. His apology sits in the air between you for a moment before he speaks again.
âIâm really sorry. Namjoon is right. I am trying to be less of an asshole to you. We donâtâŠâ he catches himself, âI donât have a lot of close friends who are women.â
âYou donât say.â
That seems to cut through the fog. He hangs his head and focuses his gaze on the table.
âI never wanted to hurt your feelings.â
âWell, you did,â you mumble.
âI know... Iâm sorry.â Itâs like now that heâs said it once, he canât stop saying it. Heâs not sure how to make you understand. Maybe you do understand and you just wonât forgive him. Can he really blame you for that?
âWhy?â you question; itâs the last barrier protecting your heart, the only thing keeping you from caving. âWhy do you care now?â
Jungkookâs head lolls to one side as he sits back against his seat and stares at the nearly empty bottle of sakĂ©. âI donât know. I guess I was thinking⊠I wish I had a save to reload. Before I messed up.â
It seems thatâs the best youâre going to get out of him right now. The waitress sets down a beautiful platter of banana tempura meticulously arranged around a simple mound of ice cream, topped with a single cherry and drizzled with decorative chocolate. She places three waters on the table and you both take a moment to politely force smiles and pause your conversation.
He licks his lips and stares down at the plate and then back up at you. âCan we start over?â
âDepends. Are you gonna go back to being a dick when youâre not drunk anymore?â
âNo, no. I mean it. I wanna try to be friends.â
âFor real?â You swipe the cherry, pop it in your mouth and tilt your head to regard him. You canât let yourself fully believe him. You want to. The earnestness in his drunken features charms you, but you hold onto a shred of disbelief as a crutch. Youâll wait for the moment he reverts. Hopefully this time youâll be prepared for the whiplash that comes along with it.
âFor real.â
You reflect on his apology as the pair of you dig into the dessert. âMaybe. Prove it.â
He perks up. Heâll take a maybe. Maybe means the damage heâs done might not be irreparable. The guilt weighing on his conscience feels lighter. Itâs a start.
âI will. Iâll find some way to make it up to you.â
You roll your eyes, unwilling to put stock in his words. âIs this another bet with Hobi? About how quickly you can make me forgive you?â
Jungkook shakes his head furiously, wisps of wild black hair whipping his cheeks. âNo, I mean it. I promise.â
You drag your lip through your teeth as you teeter on the line of acceptance. âWhat is a promise from a liar worth?â
He drops the flat of his palm to the table and he pouts. âHey. I mean itâŠ. Hm. If I break my promiseâŠâ His eyes scan the table for anything he can use to change your mind. He looks at his arm pressed against the table and then back at you. âYou can choose my next tattoo.â
Your eyebrows rise into your hairline. âReally.â
He eagerly nods. âIâll get whatever you want wherever you want. Just. Not my face.â
âI want that in writing,â you snort.
Jungkook glances around the table and pulls a napkin from under the plate of tempura. âDo you have a pen?â
âJungkook, you donât have toââ
âIâm serious.â Heâs not taking no for an answer.
You shake your head and rummage through your purse to supply him with a pen. He smooths out the napkin heâs chosen to use as a conduit for his promise. When heâs finished writing he slides it towards you.
Princess
Iâm sorry. I can make it right.
I promise. Please give me another chance.
If I blow it you can choose what & where my next tattoo goes.
As long as itâs not my face. Letâs be friends? #promise.com ⥠Jungkook
Of course he signed it with a heart. Despite his inebriation, his handwriting is still neat. Well, thatâs one hell of a promise.
âOkay.â You fold the note and drop it into your purse. âWe can try.â
His face lights up as he stuffs a piece of tempura into his mouth, happily chomping with his mouth wide open. He reaches for the saké but you slide a water in front of him instead.
âFriends donât let friends get totally shitfaced at Hajime.â
He frowns at you but seems to accept your answer with a pout.
âSpeaking of which⊠Where is Namjoon?â You crane your neck to look around the restaurant.
âFriday noodle nights common for you guys?â Jungkook asks, digging into the dessert between massive gulps of water.
âNo, not really. Weâre usually watching movies at my place or hanging with Hobi. But Namjoon wanted to take me out because I was sad,â you say, finally catching sight of your friend on the other side of the bar.
Jungkookâs chewing slows and he regards you with furrowed brows. âSad?â
Before you can decide how you want to answer, Namjoon is scooting into the booth next to Jungkook and reaching for a piece of tempura. âMmmm. What did I miss?â
âY/N was telling me why sheâs sad.â
Namjoon nods like he understands exactly what youâve been talking about. âHeâs a dick, right? Like how do you even stand someone up, not once, but twice? Makes no sense.â
âJoonieââ
âAnd I know what youâre gonna say, but I disagree. It has nothing to do with you or how you look, Y/N. You donât need to workout like a maniac to try to change anything. Especially not for someone like Jason. I canât even imagineââ
âJoon.â You click your tongue and slide a glass of water in front of him. âPlease, shut the fuck up.â
As you glare at him, he looks at you with raised brows and wide eyes. Unsure what to do now that heâs obviously fubared the conversation, he casts his guilty gaze to his cup and brings it to his lips.
Jungkook stares at you with furrowed brows, trying to wait to let you fill in the blanks even though heâs itching to ask about everything. He picks another piece of tempura and stuffs it into his mouth, but when you remain silent the impulse to pry takes over. âJason?â
âHe stood me upâŠâ you start, but you close your mouth when you realize youâre going to try to defend him. Your throat feels full, like you canât get enough air through with a giant knot in it like this. You have to whisper so your voice doesnât crack. âTwice.â
The couple drinking at the table nearby becomes a much more interesting place to rest your eyes than the two men across from you. Tightening your jaw doesnât prevent the gloss from coating your eyes. Thinking about it makes you feel so stupid and desperate. Bending over backwards a thousand different ways to accommodate him couldnât convince him to put in even a minimal amount of effort one time.
Jungkookâs eyebrows shoot up in genuine surprise. âTwice?â
The hurt you feel in your chest scorches your cheeks until anger is filling your head like a teakettle ready to release an unhealthy amount of steam right in Jungkookâs face.
âThatâs what I get for giving people second chances,â you snap as you focus back on him.
Joon says your name like itâs a warning but you donât need it. You feel guilty enough for projecting your anger onto Jungkook with a petty one-liner.
âSorry. Itâs not your fault. I justâŠâ Your throat closes around the rest of the words.
Before an uncomfortable silence can settle over the table, Namjoon inches the bottle of sakĂ© with his fingertips until itâs in front of him. âDating is tricky. Jason sucks. It sucks that he hurt you. But you donât have to twist yourself into whatever you think he wants anymore. And thatâŠâ He pours the pitiful remainder of alcohol into a shot glass and slides it towards you.â...is worth celebrating.â
Jungkook silently nods his head in agreement. Itâs obvious youâre on the verge of tears and he doesnât want to be the thing that pushes you over the edge.
A soft smile curls the corners of your mouth. âThatâs true, butâŠâ you slide the glass back towards him and steal the last of the banana tempura. âI can celebrate back at my apartment. Finish your water so youâll be awake enough to join me. Both of you.â
Jungkook perks up and happily reaches for his water while Namjoon gives you a proud, yet confused look. It seems like a new start to something. What that is remains to be seen.
â± ââââââ {.â
⯠â
.} ââââââ â°
Jungkook watches intently as the colors of the city shine through the windows. He runs his fingers over the soft blanket you keep in the backseat, mouthing the words to the song softly playing from your dashboard. Namjoon has been talking nonstop from the passenger seat, which is fine with Jungkook since heâs feeling a little tired. The last session of the day was a bit more intense than intended, but the client left happy and covered in sweat. A success. But Jungkook is sore and exhausted. Physically and socially.
A sense of relief floods him at the memory of his conversation with you. Things may actually be okay from here. Who would have thought crashing your noodle night with Namjoon could have yielded such results?
His head bobs to the music as his eyes wander across the scenery outside until he grows bored and they drift to the interior of your car. A graduation tassel swings from your rearview mirror as you turn. He follows the movement of the tassel when it swings towards you and his eyes land on your face, or at least what he can see of it from this angle.
You look focused and calm while conversing with Namjoon but your posture is a bit rigid and your hands remain planted on the steering wheel in complete control. Thereâs something about this candid snapshot of your persona that puts him at ease. Your voice is a soft contrast to Namjoonâs, but equally enthusiastic.
He tilts his head as he leans back in his seat, pulling the blanket over his lap and twisting the fabric around his palm. Your eyes flicker in the rearview mirror, catching his. He gives a tiny wave and rests his head against the cushion, fighting the temptation to close his eyelids for longer than a second. The more he listens to you laugh, the more he finds himself smiling. Itâs goofy.
Itâs also kind of cute.
â± ââââââ {.â
⯠â
.} ââââââ â°
Jungkook is surprised when Yoongi answers your knock; he thought he would be asleep. Heâs even more surprised when you make yourself at home on his couch and guilt him with a puppy dog pout to make you a drink, and he complies. When Jungkook asks the same, Yoongi tells him thereâs beer in the fridge while measuring out the ingredients for your cocktail. The suspicious sour ache of jealousy stabs his gut as he moseys to the fridge but he quickly shakes it off, settling on the floor in front of the tv with a beer in hand.
After a couple hours of drinking, laughing, and playing Jackbox games with the three men, youâre feeling much better about everything. Life is good. Friends are good. Alcohol is very good.
It doesnât take much to get you drunk. Youâre about as much of a lightweight as Hobi and for better or worse everyone has come to know that fact. Whatâs nice about drinking in Yoongiâs apartment is that you donât have to walk very far to get home. Things donât get awkward with the three of them together; itâs actually kind of nice, like a mini Saturday night pregame.
Soon Namjoon and Yoongi are snoring on the couch with a movie playing in the background while you stand in the kitchen with Jungkook. He pours another drink for himself, though he knows it will mostly likely remain unfinished. Tomorrow may bring a massive hangover, but tonight has been surprisingly pleasant. He feels like heâs finally on okay footing with you, maybe even on the road to serious repair. Amazing how well you get along when inhibitions are replaced by inebriation. If thatâs what it takes, heâs determined to keep it up.
As he turns his back to place the liquor bottle in the cabinet by the fridge, you swipe a sip of the drink heâs concocted. He spins around in time to see you wrinkle your nose and stick your tongue out.
âHey, thatâs mine!â he pouts.
âBlegh. You can have it. Yuck!â Your face screws up again at the aftertaste.
He drunkenly giggles as he slides the drink closer to him. âWhat, donât like sour?â
âToo sour!â You reach for the water bottle Yoongi gave you hours ago and attempt to rinse the puckering sensation from your mouth.
Amused, he tilts his head and watches you take gulp after gulp. He purses his lips and holds back the comment itching to escape, deciding to enjoy a sip of his drink instead. You shimmy out of your hoodie and tie it around your waist and his eyes lazily follow the motion of your arms, noting a slight difference in their musculature. Some errant thought about their shape leads him back to an earlier unaddressed comment that heâs finally comfortable enough to prod you about.
âWhat kind of workouts are you doing?â he blurts.
Suddenly you feel very exposed. You straighten in your seat and suck in your gut, hyper aware of every imperfection of your body on display to someone so in shape. You immediately begin to fidget with the sleeves of the hoodie you just tied around your waist.
âYou donât have to tell me. I justââ he pauses, exhaling a small breath and looking down at his drink as though heâs wary of continuing the thought.
âNo, no itâs fine,â you assure him, too curious to say otherwise. âWhat is it?â
âWhen Namjoon saidâŠâ he sighs and takes a sip, smacking his lips and licking them before looking back to you. âI thought maybe I can prove myself to you by helping you come up with a plan.â
âYou donât have to do that.â You plant an elbow on the counter and lean on it.
âI want to,â he insists, reaching out for your arm.
His hand is like fire engulfing your skin and your eyelids flutter at the sensation. Instinctively you place a hand over his and rub your thumb anxiously over it. He looks down to where your thumb grazes his knuckles and then back up to your face with a surprised smile.
âUm⊠Everything,â you say, trying to sound as vague and nonchalant as possible so he doesnât judge you for your lack of knowledge.
âLike, full body?â
âUh...â Youâve managed to make a habit of going to his gym a few days a week while successfully avoiding him, but it seems that time is coming to an end. âI⊠machine.â
âOh. Like at a gym? Did you join one?â He seems genuinely curious.
âUm, yeah.â Suddenly you pull your hand back when you realize the speed at which your thumb is moving.
âWhich one?â
The more you say, the more suspicious you seem, but is saying less any better? Jungkook rests his elbow on the counter and simply looks at you but you donât look back. A slow smile spreads his lips as the possibility dawns on him.
âPrincess⊠Did you join Iron Kingdom?â
You puff your cheeks and force the air through the tiny opening of your mouth. You donât offer any sort of confirmation and continue to avoid his gaze.
âAnd you didnât tell me?â he playfully prods, drumming his fingers against your forearm.
âI⊠Yeah,â you admit, your voice small as you stare at the counter. âI didnât want you to know.
âWhy?â
âBecause.â
âBecause?â
âI donât want to give you another thing to make fun of me for.â
âIâm not gonna make fun of you.â When you donât respond he tugs on your arm. The motion is enough to angle you towards him. âHey. Hey. Hey. Hey.â
âWhat?â you grumble, staring at your lap even as you face him.
He takes your hands in his and drunkenly waves them around. âHeeeeeeeey. Look at me.â
He pouts until you reluctantly drag your eyes to meet his. âWhat?â
âEveryone starts somewhere,â he says softly. âEven me.â
The shift in his demeanor catches you off guard and you subconsciously lean forward as you relax. âWell I started with Hwasa, but I was too sore to ask for another session with her.â
He nods sympathetically, clapping his hand over yours. âYou should try again.â
You shake your head. âI donât know. I feel likeâŠâ
âLike?â he prods when you let the silence trail for a bit too long.
âI donât know what Iâm doing,â you sigh. âI feel like I donât belong there. I look so stupid reading the instructions on the machines. I donât even think Iâm doing it right.â
âWhat?â He makes a sound between a laugh and a grunt. âThereâs nothing wrong with making sure you donât hurt yourself. Nobody knows how to instantly do things. If they tell you they do, theyâre lying.â
âOr theyâre Namjoon,â you say with a roll of your eyes, glancing over at your snoring friend.
He smiles and clicks his tongue against his teeth in thought. âI didnât know what I was doing when I started.â
âReally.â
Youâre skeptical. Itâs always seemed like he was born in a gym. Or maybe hatched. Heâs kind of inhumanly gorgeous. Maybe he sprouted from a flower like a mythical god.
âFor real. First time doing squats. I think it was gym class? Yeah, I was like twelve or thirteen. I was⊠not very athletic. Didnât play sports or anything. Kind of shy. Didnât really have a lot of friends eitherâŠâ
The way he trails off makes your heart hurt. Puberty isnât nice to most people. Itâs hard to imagine a world where someone like Jungkook isnât instantly popular and naturally fit. While youâre not exactly the same person you were at twelve, a lot of your interests and personality quirks have remained the same. Youâre still painfully awkward at times. How did he manage to overcome something like that? Is it not ingrained in him like it is you?
âJust a big dork, you know?â He laughs. âI see this girl I had a crush on, Amber. Sheâs looking at me. I think I have to impress her. So Iâm stacking up weight and I think Iâm hot shit and go too fast. Know what happened?â
âPlease donât tell me you dropped it on your foot or something,â you plead, squeezing his palms at the way heâs building up the story. The secondhand embarrassment is too real.
âI hear a pop.â
âNo!â you gasp, bringing your hands to your face as if you can stop the past from happening.
âAnd pain. So much pain. I donât remember putting the weights down but I remember ending up on my back, staring up at the ceiling.â
âOh no. Knees?â
âWorse.â He points down to his crotch. âPulled a muscle in my groin. Had to sit the rest of the day with an ice pack on my junk. Was not fun. My point is: donât give up. You learn more as you go. Give Hwasa another shot.â
His anecdote gives you pause but youâre desperate to cling to the comfort of your anxiety. âMy free trial with her is almost up and I donât think Iâll be able to afford to keep at it.â
âMore excuses,â he teases, taking a sip of his drink. âAt this point I should justââ His eyes widen, a lightbulb practically forming above his head as he puts his cup down. âIâll be your personal trainer!â
âUhhâŠâ
âNo, no. Itâs perfect. Weâre friends now.â He smiles, proud of himself for finding a way to prove himself to you. âI can teach you everything you need to know about working out. I can set up a plan for you and figure out the best way to help you achieve your goals. Oh, man weâre gonna have to figure out your goals. What do youââ
âHold on. Hold on,â you interrupt with a nervous laugh. âYouâre missing the part where I still canât afford it.â
He rolls his eyes and grabs your glass, holding it under the sink to refill it. âDonât worry about that. Iâll cover it.â
Youâre stunned into silence as you observe the expanse of his back, searching the black fabric of his t-shirt for the definition of his muscles. He sets the cup in front of you, waiting for your agreement. When it doesnât come, he second guesses himself. Did he overstep?
âI mean if youâre okay with that. Would-would you want to do that?â
The innocent drunken sparkle in his eyes makes your stomach do a flip. When you woke up this morning you hardly thought the day would include getting sloshed with Jungkook and having him offer to take you on as a fitness trainee. Itâs like heâs opened himself up just enough for you to see the soft mess beneath. You like it. You like it a lot and you kind of hate yourself for it. While you donât know if you can trust him past the evening, you find yourself hoping you can.
âYou wonât make fun of me?â you ask timidly before bringing the cup of water to your lips.
âItâs my job not to make fun of you. We start where youâre at and go from there. And like I said, Iâll cover the fees for as long as you want. No pressure.â He smiles at you. âWhat do you think?â
â...Okay,â you murmur with a nod of your head. âIf youâre serious, then Iâm⊠Iâm in!â
His lips part to expose his teeth as his grin spreads. âYes!â
As he brings his hand up in a sign of victory, his knuckles knock against his glass. You reach for the cup with impaired reflexes, hands fumbling over the slippery surface in conjunction with his. The sour contents spill across the counter as the pair of you struggle to right the glass. While heâs quicker at getting the glass upright, your brain is faster at processing what to do next and you already have a paper towel in hand, wiping up the liquid as fast as possible.
Your eyes follow the spill to the edge of the counter where itâs flooded over the side. Acting on instinct rather than rational thought, you quickly press down where the liquid has begun to pool in his lap. As you fold the paper towel over, you rub frantically as if the action will keep the stain from setting into the fabric. He shifts in his seat and squeaks out a sound so small that you canât actually tell whether it came from him or the chair.
It only dawns on you how inappropriate your actions are when you glance towards his face and find his wide eyes gazing back at you. His cheeks, already flushed from inebriation, seem twice as vivid and his mouth is parted slightly as though he means to speak, but he doesnât. Maybe he doesnât want to embarrass you, but itâs too late for that.
Your palm stills against his crotch as the shape beneath becomes clear in your mind. For a second youâre frozen, but your lips work quickly to mumble an apology. It feels like an eternity before you will your drunken fingers to release the paper towel. The clearing of Jungkookâs throat is followed by a tiny giggle, then a full on snort. A grin spreads across your lips and you soon follow him into a fit of laughter. You thank the universe for the small mercy of being drunk enough to push your embarrassment to the side for the time being.
âI wasnât thinking!â you wheeze, tears in your eyes from laughing so hard. âIâm sorry.â
âItâs okay. Itâll dry.â He laughs, dabbing his pants and shirt in the absence of your hand. As he stands he pulls the hem of his shirt away from his torso and looks down at it. âReally. Itâs my fault Iâm soâŠâ
âSticky?â You quirk an eyebrow at him, a blatant flirtatious action thinly disguised as a joke as you eye the blot of liquor staining the lower half of his shirt.
Both of his eyebrows raise and a mischievous smile curls the corner of his lips. â...Wet.â
You consider his answer with a pleased hum and turn back to the counter to polish off the last of your water. Youâre friends now, right? It canât be that easy. But it kind of is. So whatâs wrong with a little harmless flirting between friends?
Drunk brain, who happens to be a notorious hoe, assures you itâs great. Rational brain might disagree, but sheâs taking a well-deserved nap. Youâve at least had a good night. Youâre not sure it matters at this point who is giving you the attention you crave. It feels good. So good, in fact, youâre sure you can indulge drunk brain a little more.
Youâre drawn to the inky shapes swirling around Jungkookâs bicep as he wipes the counter down. Every time your eyes begin to focus on an object marking his skin with some kind of meaning, he moves and you lose it. Itâs brush strokes, isnât it? Youâve definitely seen a paintbrush and mountains and a knife surrounded by roses. A swathe of grey and purple connects to each one youâve seen, but you know there are more.
Before you can blurt that youâre dying to know how many he has and how bad it hurt to get them, he turns toward the sink and begins to work his t-shirt up his torso. You watch in awe as the toned muscles of his back are exposed. The image of the bright phoenix does little to hide their definition.
Trying to will yourself to look away is of no use; heâs hot and youâre drunk enough to acknowledge that fact. Of course he peeks at you just as the shirt slips over his head to find you open-mouthed and dazed, ogling him as though there isnât any shame in the world that could pull your gaze from him. He turns to the fridge to give you a moment to compose yourself, nabbing a water bottle from the shelf in the process. Youâre clearly not ready for the way he quickly spins on the balls of his feet to face you.
Y/N.exe has stopped working.
Your fingers hang in the air suspiciously until you lazily drop them. But Jungkook dons a toothy grin and has the audacity to look shy. He mockingly shields his chest from you with the shirt clutched in his hands.
âPrincess! Are you⊠checking me out?â
Somehow you donât let the fire in your face turn your brain to ash.âPfft, no.â
âWhatâre you doing, then?â he teases with a laugh as he sits, scooting his chair closer to yours.
âCounting,â you reply simply, brow furrowed in concentration. To drive the point home, you poke at his flesh everywhere you can make out an object drawn into its surface.
âHow many?â he wonders, watching with cloudy, amused eyes.
âMmmâŠâ You trail your finger down his arm and back up, following the curve of the brushstroke around his shoulder. âCanât tell if this counts as one.â
He shrugs and rests his head on his palm as he leans against the counter. âWhat do you think?â
You hesitate when he quickly quirks a brow.
âI think⊠A lot.â
âDefinitely accurate,â he says with a grin.
Awkward laughter steers the pair of you towards your waters. The TV in the background provides enough noise to steal your focus; youâre grateful for the distraction from the attractive man beside you. Drunk brain is telling you to touch him again, to grab his hand, to feel the touch of someone just for the night, to ruin every good thing this night has started to rebuild between you. Anything to stave off the emptiness of your bed, the 2AM thoughts of failure, and the drunken desperation to find someone, anyone, who will fall in love with whatever image you happen to project on your dating profile.
Heart pounding wildly in your chest and blood rushing through your ears, your fingertips tap against the countertop as they inch closer to where his arm rests. Luckily your futile attempts at nonchalance go unnoticed. Jungkook anxiously turns his water bottle over in his hands, trying to gather words in his brain before freeing them from his mouth.
âSoâŠâ he begins.
You jump at the sudden sound and retract your hand while heâs not paying you any mind.
âI was thinking. About that guyâŠâ
You wish you could at least pretend you donât know who heâs talking about. Youâve vented plenty tonight, but still your heart sinks. Deleting Jasonâs digital footprint from your life was simple and quick, but the feelings of rejection and disappointment that swirl in the back of your mind spill forward the longer his pause continues.
âI know this probably means nothing coming from me. But I justâ I know you liked him, but you can do better.â
Your posture stiffens at his reassurance and you find yourself grateful heâs not looking at you. Do you deserve better?
âYou deserve better,â he affirms, as if somehow aware of your internal struggle.
âThanks,â you murmur with a distinct lack of enthusiasm as you stare down your glass.
It's cry hours, isnât it?
Realizing you donât believe him, he takes a deep breath and nudges you with his elbow. âHey.â
âWhat.â You refuse to look up because you know youâre on the verge of an irrational stream of tears over some guy you hardly knew. Itâs stupid and you know it. But the wet warmth coating your eyes tells you itâs coming regardless.
âIâm... sorry that you donât feel like you do. Some people canât get over the weight of their own shit. But that doesnât mean itâs on you to pick it up for them. If they canât even bother to carry themselves to meet you halfway, then theyâre not worth the effort.â
Itâs a perfect time for your heart to seize up and it takes the opportunity to do so. The advice he offers doesnât stave off the tears, but it resonates deep within you. Namjoon said something similar. It makes you ache to hear it again from someone else. It just leads you back to the same questions you keep asking yourself. Whatâs so wrong with you that people donât even want to try? Is it your personality? Physicality? Is it a lack of confidence? What is it?
âI canât even get a shitty guy to like me. Maybe Iâm the one not worth the effort.â You donât dare say those words out loud. Pity isnât something youâre looking for. A warm body to fill your bed maybe, but not pity.
âSounds easy when you say it like that,â you murmur, trying in vain to will the tears not to fall. Youâre quick to swipe at them and force a smile. âI guess I have trouble giving up on people. Itâs not that Iâm naive. I try to be realistic. But no matter how many times I get fucked over I just... hope for the best in people. I canât help it.â
He pats your arm reassuringly. âThatâs why you deserve better.â
If only it was as simple as hearing those words and magically being able to believe it. A big chunk of your confidence has crumbled away and thereâs no clear path to restoration. As the warmth of his palm comes to rest against your arm, you place your hand over his and squeeze.
âI donât know if I believe it,â you pause and thoughtfully add, âbut thanks for saying it.â
His eyebrows raise in surprise and he offers a tiny, âYouâre welcome.â
A shaky chuckle passes your lips. All of his features seem to soften the more you look at them. Maybe itâs the drunken gloss coating his big brown eyes or the way his lips slightly part as he looks back at you. The tightly coiled nerves in your belly urge you to unravel.
Although it's a subtle gesture, he licks his lips as he smiles and it practically seals your fate. If you don't leave now you're bound to do something you'll regret.
"It's late. I should sleep."
Or masturbate.
The speed at which you launch yourself from the seat is unpleasant. You're not sure what's worse: the dizzying vertigo or waves nausea sloshing in your gut. Jungkook's reflexes may be delayed but he's a steady mass of muscle the moment you reach out to steady yourself.
"Whoa. You okay?"
"Maybe," you mumble, finding yourself drawn to the heat radiating from his skin. Instead of walking away, slump down to rest your cheek against his shoulder and sling an arm around him. You might be drunker than you thought. "I don't know."
"Hmm. What do you need, princess?"
"Just wanna stop spinning."
His stance shifts to better accommodate the additional weight you press against him.
"How about you take over Yoongi's bed tonight," he suggests softly. "He's passed out anyway."
"No, I should go home." You peel your cheek from the warmth of his skin.
âYou gonna make it there?â
âYes,â you say indignantly. The world may be a bit wobbly right now, but youâre certain you can handle the short stroll down the hall.
"Okay.â He smiles, loosening his hold. As you step back your foot catches on the leg of the chair and it drags loudly against the floor.
Despite Jungkookâs attempt to keep you standing by grabbing at your arms, he loses his balance and he drops to his knees. The chair clatters to the floor before your ass does. Luckily his grip keeps your back and head far from impact, but youâre too cramped to be comfortable.
âAre you okay?â he asks. Those big, dark doe eyes of his are frozen in fear and a frown adorns his face. He looks so serious itâs ridiculous.
You canât help but laugh, wiggling backwards to make space between his body and the heat steadily building between your legs. âIâm fine. Stop making that face.â
âHuh? What do you mean?â He sits back on his feet and tilts his head to the side in confusion.
He breaks into a fit of giggles when you dramatically mimic his expression. You roll back onto your elbows, making another ridiculous face to further mock him.
âNo, no. Itâs more likeâŠâ Jungkook takes the opportunity to lean over you, reaching with one hand to squeeze your cheeks to pucker your lips. You blow a disjointed raspberry at him before pulling his hand off to the side.
While the clamor of the fallen chair did nothing to rouse the men on the couch, the sound of Jungkookâs hearty laughter is loud enough to disturb the rhythmic snores of Namjoon.
Jungkook sits back on his heels and peeks over the countertop. He seems miles away, even as you sit up and scoot in to bring yourself closer. Laughter fades into a quiet hum as Namjoonâs snoring resumes.
You're lost in the abyss of his gaze as he turns his head to look back at you. All that remains in your brain at this point is a foggy desire to tug on the silky spirals of his ebony hair until he presses himself against you one more time.
Your hand settles for following the curves of his bicep instead, wondering how it might feel to be wrapped within his embrace. Some might say liquor makes you bold and stupid, and they're right. They should say it. But it also makes you feel invincible, like a goddamn glowing Mario star power-up.
"Princess?"
Enraptured, his eyes follow the motion of your hand as it slithers around his arm and squeezes. Unable to ignore the prompt, he answers with a flex against your palm. His ego swells when you shiver and noticeably hold your breath.
You know it's a mistake. You know it goes against all of your sober judgement, but you find yourself doing it anyway. It doesn't matter that you still harbor a grudge that holds your heart hostage. Drunk hoe vibes are taking the wheel. Youâre tired, drunk as hell, and just want to feel wanted. And he's here.
Every fiber of your inebriated being is singing in unison: Why the fuck not?
Heartbeat pounding against your eardrums, you attempt to gauge his reaction as you lean towards him. It's hard to tell from beneath half-lidded eyes, but you think he's leaning towards you too. If he isn't you suppose you can always play it off like you're just a mess. It's not far from the truth. Focusing on the tiny freckle below his lip, you allow yourself to finally close your eyes and go for it.
But the universe isnât here for your dumb boozy bitch mistakes.
The front door swings open with the sound of jingling keys dropping to the floor. It snaps you back to reality and you freeze, realizing there's no defense that will save you. Jungkook is quick to disengage, poking his head above the counter to acknowledge Hoseokâs presence with a wave. But his friend is completely enamored with the company heâs ushering towards his bedroom.
âYeah, baby? How bad?â Hoseok whispers to the giggling girl wrapped around his arm.
He pins the stranger against the door to drag his tongue across her neck. Their bodies move rhythmically in a slow grind, a precursor for whatâs likely to come. Jungkook purses his lips. How long until one of them notices him watching? Itâs not until the girl moans Hoseokâs name softly that Jungkook spares a panicked look towards you.
Oh shit.
You gesture for him to get down before he draws their attention. The last thing you want to explain is why youâre on your knees in Hoseokâs kitchen with a very shirtless Jungkook standing close by. He obliges your silent request, squatting down beside you.
âFeel how hard you made me?â Hobi chuckles quietly.
The girl giggles, her voice growing closer. âYou gonna fuck me right here or what?â
âYouâd like that, wouldnât you? Naughty girl. What if my roommate wakes up? Looks like he has a friend over too. You really want them to see what a dirty slut you are?â
You can hear her giggle as he directs her where to go, failing to keep his voice down so you hear every filthy thing he says after. Your hands fly to cover your mouth. Is your skin made of lava? You want to blame it on the close proximity to Jungkook, but the only thing you can imagine is Hoseokâs dick and the eager mystery woman about to be impaled by it. Can you scrub your brain of this memory? How are you supposed to look at him after this?
Jungkook watches your face carefully, trying his hardest not to laugh. Your eyes look so big heâs pretty sure they could roll out of your skull any second. Are you really so innocent? The way you cover your mouth says you are, but maybe itâs just the shock. Maybe youâre just trying to not laugh. Or scream. Or breathe? It kind of looks like you might pass out.
Are you gonna make it, princess? he wonders.
Once you hear Hoseok's bedroom door close, you fuss your hands over your hair and scramble to your feet, releasing a big exhale. The hushed words fall from your lips while you scurry away like a timid mouse. "I should go."
Despite being too far to make contact, he reaches out as you round the counter. "Waitâ"
As soon as the word leaves his mouth he struggles to come up with the rest of his statement. Thereâs no reason to keep you here, except to maybe laugh a little about what just happened to smooth over any second-hand embarrassment. So why doesnât he want you to go?
He swallows down the blank space caught in his throat and searches every last crevice of his brain for something of import to say. Guilt weighs his gut down, though there isnât a clear cause. Heâs probably screwed something up again without realizing it.
âThanks for giving me another shot,â he says softly.
You breathe a sigh of relief and offer a tiny smile as you half turn, your hand already on the door handle. âDonât blow it.â
He nods with a smile. âI wonât. Goodnight.â
ââNight,â you mumble.
As soon as the door is closed you practically sprint down the hall to lock yourself within your apartment. Maybe it will also lock out all the mistakes your brain has made tonight.
The world feels colder now that youâre not pressed against the human-shaped heater that is Jeon Jungkook. Thinking about him makes your heart swell and ache at the same time. Regardless of how badly you wish you'd asked him to bed, you know loneliness is fleeting and guilt would be a far worse feeling to be saddled with.
â± ââââââ {.â
⯠â
.} ââââââ â°
Jungkook picks up the fallen chair, finding your soft, worn hoodie draped over it. Rubbing a thumb over the material, he considers running it back to you, but he can't remember which door is yours. It's not like he's been here often enough to know. Instead he slips his arms through the sleeves before flipping the hood over his head.
He settles on the floor in the space he previously claimed for the night, pulling a blanket out from under Yoongi's ass. Yoongi rolls his head up, a scowl on his features though his eyes remain closed. He grumbles but lies down, facing the couch.
Jungkook regards his friend for a moment before deciding to drape the blanket over him instead of claiming it for himself. Jungkook rolls onto his side and fluffs the throw pillow under his head. As he watches the credits roll on the TV, he nuzzles into your sweater.
He closes his eyes, thinking of you. He knows he shouldn't linger on the little occurrences of the night, especially with how foggy his brain is. He can't trust anything about his memory.
Still he thinks of the way your fingers trailed along his arm and curled tightly around his bicep. He lets himself dwell on the tiny sound you made, the involuntary tremble of your body, and the subsequent hitch in your breath.
He smiles and inhales the subtle scent you've left behind. A new spark of adrenaline fans flames that inflate his ego, spreading warmth from his stomach up into his chest. The world may wobble around him right now, but the little magical warmth within his gut helps him comfortably drift off to dreamland like he's the world's most immovable object.
#smutcentralnet#jungkook smut#jungkook fic#bts fic#jungkook x reader#jungkook fluff#jungkook x you#bts fluff#jungkook fanfic#bts fanfic
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Who is your LI in each book? How did you choose them?
thank you for asking đ„° ill reply abt ones i actually care about đ
Heavens Secret > Mimi, then Malbonte : essentially i went w Mimi bc i loved her design (who doesn't) but while her badass independent attitude is charming u see there's sth soft and vulnerable in her and i found her route very satisfying,, her love of plays, relationship with her father (rip btw ;-;) is just so precious... loved how she gets jealous and angry and won't let the mc walk all over her,, eventually I went with Malbonte bc he reminded me of another li I loved from another (now dead) app... that I didn't love tbh, I love an against the system character but I guess his 'love' wasn't enough for me... well my character. I love his backstory though and he is a very interesting character
Sails in the Fog > Chris Chris Chris... and Manta : so I played this story twice n each time I couldn't pick anyone but Chris (and not only bc I headcanon her as a lesbian and didn't want men to hit on her đ€) she is very brave, she is beautiful, she is good with knives ~ what more could a girl want! Seriously through I think she s my favourite in the whole app with her bashfulness in emotional moments, protectiveness and fun loving personality. She has a bleak upbringing - doesn't let it bring her down, knows what she wants... yes she's very young (18?) and you feel this restless energy, but it doesn't feel sexualised,, in my story she kept disguising as a guy and they lived that way which I felt was the most respectful option like she doesn't need ball gowns to be a woman,,, and obviously in that time it'd be more comfortable if they went around as a man and woman instead of 2 women... Manta is just too mysterious I couldn't not pick his scenes but I never went w becoming his 'slave' route... the thing between them was just a brief intense experience nothing more. He s interesting
Path of the Valkyrie > Liod : y'all if u know me u know I played this book more than anything so I romanced all the characters. Liod supremacy fr. I love her I think she s so so interesting and different than other characters like her --- which is tall and sorta likes fighting, strong, you know the type. She'd usually be weirdly dominant and aggressive (well she is aggressive but not like that) a badly written wlw subversion of this big brute barbarian li.... But no she s anything but that. Liod is really thoughtful, she s smart, she s not afraid of asking for help, while she s protective of the mc she also teaches her how to fight and supports her. She's really loving and in moments she becomes vulnerable its clear to see she cares a lot for the mc u see this w/o anyone clearly saying those 3 words I call it good writing. They don't need to be constantly outwit each other w the mc tbh I'm not fond of that constantly bickering couple trope so I love the loving calm understanding these 2 have going on. Now I also really love Andvari he is very different too like with his delicate build or polite speech,,, honestly wish I could do both their routes
Theodora > Friedrich or Yoke : man i was really set on being a second mommy to Bruno and suddenly this shy german soldier got my attention... mostly i kind of related to him for his personality, interests 'wanting to feel safe and cared for by his so' and aversion to conflicts... He might be one of the top 5 characters i relate to rn.... ~ no but rlly i loved how he was trying to help that kid, trying to make up for the fact he's with the invading force and how he so obviously doesnt want to be there... unless he s like a spy which is a theory of mine... Doesnt help that i have a thing for blond men too.. Still its too early to say more. With Yoke i kind of loved the single mom representation? like some people have kids they still find love w others, its a thing. How she stands behind her decisions â during ww1 nonetheless! She might not be very flashy rn but i find her bravery and refusal to get shy her life and choices such as not taking very dangerous jobs bc she s the only parent her son has - very attractive. She s lovely.
Kali Call of Darkness > Ratan : im not gonna lie the first time i saw him i was like omg please be a love interest đ„ș He is one beautiful man. He is charming. He is definitely keeping secrets. Probably the dangerous kind. But man i cant help love him. The sensual way he speaks during the diamond scenes, his politeness and the way he urges the mc to be bolder w/o overstepping boundaries, and reminds her of her worth and significance and strength as a woman is just đđœđđœđđœ very beautiful... Something I never saw before. I love how they are both surprised at this intense cinnection they got (which i hope is a sign of something something đ) He explains everything so delicately i find his dialogues to be one of best (perhaps #1 for me rn) in the whole app.
Arcanum > Liam : i kinda lost interest in this book but Liam is still a fave,,, kinda lost my feelings tho đ€·đœââïž so my professional opinion abt Liam is that he's pretty af and i wanna brush his hair
#romance club#asks#ratan vaish#rc yoke#rc friedrich#rc pierce#rc liod#rc chris#rc manta#rc mimi#rc malbonte#long post
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All eddie depression aside, his smile when he was in the caravan saying 'Harringtons got her' was the cutest thing ever. (:
Frfr I can't stop watching that scene! His smile is adorable! âșïž
And this....THIS.... yhwrkoyesfhkgaz!!!
I was blushing at the way he said it and I'm not even He/Him or Steve. If he gave that smile to me and leaned in to say something to me in that playful tone? I'd die. đ
đ Sad and PISSED OFF girl hours ahead:
What got me was him play fighting with Dustin đ„ș and being a big brother to him. Like...I knew but I also lowkey hoped Robin was talking about someone else. I'm sorry, revoke my bi girl card but I would not have been nearly as upset if it was Robin...Not every gay character is my favorite, sue me. And would I be upset with Steve or Nancy? Not as much as Eddie! This back and forth romantic tension as their only plot just bc we KNOW they're gonna get together is getting old. The plot armor for the four older teen main characters in general is OLD. Other than Nancy being badass, Jonathan being a good brother which okay bare minimum brownie points and Steve being Mr. Mom; their personalities are bland compared to Eddie.
They turned Robin's character from the intelligent sarcastic girl that had so many tricks up her sleeve we saw at chips ahoy to a bumbling neurotic mess that offered hardly nothing this volume 2. Third Season Robin I'd be upset over, fourth season Robin? Doesn't even feel like the same character so no. And outside of when there's danger in Hawkins...Are Nancy or Jonathan or Steve REALLY that interesting or good of ppl? Bc Eddie was a good guy WAY before he realized there was danger. Jonathan is so avoidant of controversy or emotional responsibility he's being manipulative by NOT telling Nancy. Nancy is so ready to be an ambitious woman she doesn't even ask others or think of what's happening around her vs what she wants to do. Steve has zero presence other than 'protect the kids!'...What hobbies does Steve have? If there were no kids, what would he do? What other traits does he have other than 'brave, protective, himbo'? Truly. I want to know. Dewey may be those things in Scream but at least he's not a nag like Steve is. I like these characters but compared to Eddie? Not as much!
I'M SICK OF THE BORING FAVORITE CHARACTERS OF THE DUFFERS HAVING PLOT ARMOR. PERIOD.
Eddie is naturally charismatic, weird, playful, fair minded, tries to be a tough ass when he's a huge softie, funny, high energy, rebellious, he likes D&D and Metal, he has a world view that gets rocked by Chrissy and Steve and Nancy and everytime he seems to grow and realize putting labels on the popular kids is no different than ppl labeling him. He had more growth and likeable traits in THE FIRST EPISODE than the main four older kids have all season.
There was no reason for them to kill him off. The 'warding off the bats' thing did nothing. 'They'd go after Robin, Steve and Nancy' it would have taken them awhile to get there and who's to say they wouldn't have been released in time? He died in vain just for the Duffer Brothers to have a stupid point. You're telling ME...You couldn't have written Dustin doing this instead of Eddie and Eddie leaping in to help him? (And being able to get to him faster being taller and more athletically built) and even though they'll probably be injured, Eddie could have been the hero, saved Dustin and still had his 'I didn't run away' moment....It's cheap shock factor writing to kill him off. I may kill off characters but it's necessary for the plot, YN's development and realistic bc ANYONE can die in my fics. It's not realistic that every single main character has plot armor in ST but not Eddie or other side characters.
I would be less upset if other characters died bc at least it wouldn't feel like a cheap ass cop out to get rid of a side character that SHOULD have been the main.
I get he'd be a criminal in Hawkins but they could have easily written him saving everyone with an audience against Vecna or Demagorgons or something in 5 to show he's not the bad guy to Hawkins. EASILY.
AND HOW THEY HANDLED HIS DEATH??? Probably leaving his body in the upside down, not even upset other than Dustin and his Uncle, not honoring the fact he SAVED YOUR UNGRATEFUL ASSES? Idc Steve, Nancy, Robin I could care less about after this. I probably would have never even watched this series if I knew they were gonna kill off THE REASON for me picking up this show. I deadass only watched this to see Eddie in 4. FUCK.
#i literally dont care about 5 now...DAMN first scream 6 now this? Just aint our year.#2022 was supposed to be 80s summer how can i enjoy an 80s summer when the character that ppl got TATTOOS of and got everyone liking#metal and wanting to learn dnd and easily becoming one of the best characters I've seen in awhile is GONE?????#stranger things 4 spoilers#stranger things spoilers
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10 Characters I Fell in Love With in 2021
thank you for tagging me brigid @s1utspeareâ â„â„ am currently making an edit series about my fave dramas of 2021 which also includes some of my fave characters so for this, i tried picking ones i donât get to mention there!
tagging: @i-am-just-a-kiddoâ @ashenlightsâ @bang-wonâ @yiling-recessesâ @fengqingâ @wuyusâ @psychic-wafflesâ @aheartfullofjollllyâ @inessencedevidedâ @gusu-emiluâ â„Â
here are mine, in no particular order:Â
Hei Xiazi
Daomu Biji
i legit fell deeply in love with this raccoon man this year. iâve enjoyed hei xiaziâs character before but after ultimate note and lyn speaking so fondly of his role there, i started having more thoughts about hei xiazi and ended up realizing that he is probably my fave character in the whole of dmbj. i love it how unhinged he is, how he gets things done but will be a bitch about it. how heâs fun and seems unbothered but still cares deeply and has this very philosophical side to him. thereâs a lot going on behind those glasses and i obsess over figuring out every thought he has in his headÂ
(i think iâve used this gif for him before bc this is just perfect representation of how he popped into my life and decided to stay)Â
Cao Weining (Ma Wenyuan)
Word of Honor
my starry eyed boy!! my precious son whom i adore!! i love him so much ;; i remember just being delighted by him while i was watching woh. he was such a fun character, all fluff and no angst really, a precious lil bean who just loved gu xiang. i loved it how pure and innocent he was, how happy he was with gu xiang and the family that came with her, and how readily he changed himself and his thinking to adapt into the love he was feeling. his ending was a tragedy that pains me to this day and i am sorry that he had to suffer like that in the hands of those he loved. he had never done a bad thing in his life and i wish i could tell him that :(Â
(i donât even know how the actor does it but cwn literally has stars in his eyes all the time, itâs endearing)Â
Shin Daon (Choe Chanyi)
Light on Me
not much stayed with me from light on me, which i enjoyed donât get me wrong, but shin daon i fell in love with. i know he was king of the âvillainâ of the story and there were things he did that were mistakes. but i related to him so much; to his wish to please everyone, his inability to say no, his hesitance when it came to his feelings and wanting something in his life. he was so scared of what loving a boy would mean for his life and i felt sorry for him but also comforted by the way he grew up after realizing his mistake. seeing him become happier and starting to think about himself before others made me so warm and i wish we could get a side story for him where he finds love for himself too bc he deserves that â„
(just a ray of sunshine!! boy has big puppy energy :â) â„)
Teng Muren (Chen Lian)
HIStory 4: Close To You
ok listen. listen. history 4 as a whole was a disaster and the whole drama was just me shaking my head and then placing it in my hands in desperation but. but teng muren ;; our precious tengteng. his and lichengâs story was heartwarming (in most parts) and muren grew up so beautifully throughout it. from a cold-looking guy to a soft goofball. from someone you think is standoffish but who actually cares very deeply, is a good friend and a lover, and will absolutely cherish everyone he considers his. he was a mess, and his relationship with licheng was a mess, but there was a lot of good in him too and i wish to only remember that
(precious boy getting wine drunk and being a goof, love to see it)
Chu Ran (Guo Shutong)
Killer and Healer
i felt so bad that i didnât mention her in my post for this drama ;; chu ran was absolutely amazing in killer and healer and i really admire her competence. she was just a reporter but so brave when faced with the issues of her city. she was so smart and so clever and her marrying zhan junbai just to stab him in the back was so sexy of her â„ also really have to admire her patience with jiang yuelou and chen yuzhi bc wow those two are a disasterÂ
(she is so beautiful oh my god?? going through all the episodes while making my post made me just sigh dreamily bc every time she appears i just feel my heart bursting)
Qiao Sanli (Mao Xiaotong)
The Bond
watching the bond was a journey. it broke my heart but also fixed it, it left me frustrated and sometimes even bored, but at the end, it was very lovely. i havenât watched such... slice of life dramas before. there wasnât really any plot there other than seeing what happened to this bunch of siblings and the ppl associated with them. it was very refreshing somehow. sanli was my favorite in the series bc i loved how her character grew and changed, how she turned from a very stoic and temperamental child to a serious teenager and then to a shy young adult who grew up into the loveliest mother and wife. she never lost her edge and her strength and i admire her trust in herself and others despite everything she had to go through
Lin Nansheng (Zhu Yilong)
The Rebel
i never expected to watch this drama. i never expected to like it. but for a while i was absolutely obsessed with this and the whole vibe, the heartbreaking desperation of everything, the melancholy that followed everyone in this drama bc they were bound by tragedy. zhu yilong did amazing in this as lin nansheng and i loved him so much. lin nansheng deserved to have his happiness. he sacrificed so much, suffered so much, and all of that bc he wished to make life better for othersÂ
(z1l whumps so prettily tho, i donât have any complaints. the rebel offered a variety of ways to watch this one man break and z1l shines in all of those scenes bc heâs just so full of emotion)Â
Kang Elijah (Jeon Chaeâeun)
The Devil Judge
god i love this girl. she is such a savage and might stab you with her words but sheâs So Smart and So Strong and just. she is so amazing?? handling someone like kang yohan for all her life, growing up under him while absolutely despising him, being alone and lonely and vulnerable. all of that and she still has a pure heart. all of that and she still loves and dreams and fights. i loved her presence in the devil judge and i lived for her scenes with both yohan and gaon
(props to this girl for handling the two most chaotic gays out there plus their murderous bullshit, sheâs braver than the us marines đ©)
Himura Kenshin (Satoh Takeru) & Yukishiro Enishi (Maeda Mackenyu)
Rurouni Kenshin: The Final
i cheat a bit bc i cannot choose between these two. for a while in... september? i was absolutely obsessed with rurouni kenshin as i watched all the five movies in maybe two weeks? that whole story is just amazing and especially the final two movies left me feeling breathless. i loved kenshinâs story where he tries to discover himself as a person capable of loving and being able to love without destroying it. i also loved enishi bc despite him going insane with his grief and wish for revenge, he was good. he loved his sister so much and after discovering the truth, i believe he will be able to redeem himself. idk if iâve ever cried as badly to the villain of any story but that boy made me sob.
(i love both of their styling so much? satoh takeru has range as he goes from a believable killer to a confused puppy in 0.5 seconds flat and then einishiâs actor just manages the crazy look perfectly. but he is also just a boy, missing his sister, and it breaks me)
Yuan Boya (Deng Lun)
The Yin-Yang Master: Dream of Eternity
itâs weird to think that this movie came out this year. or well, it didnât but i watched it at the beginning of the year and was absolutely obsessed with it. iâve now watched it five times in total i think? i love it so much. and boya! my dear demon hunter master! god i love him. iâd let him kick me in the face. but iâd also hug him real tight. he is so good and beautiful and every day i sob about both his zhuque self and him with his hair down bc wow deng lun is. gorgeousÂ
(i love it how once boya allows himself to trust qingming, deng lunâs own self shines through :âD that man is just the happy puppy personified i swear and boya with puppy eyes makes me so soft)
Bonus: Pat (Ohm Pawat) & Pran (Nanon Korapat)
Bad Buddy The Series
i wasnât sure if i could put this here bc bad buddy hasnât finished yet but this was âcharacters i fell in love with in 2021âł and i did fall in love with both of these boys during last year. i just love them both and the whole series so, so much. it has become my life and they both own my heart. i relate to pran on a personal level while pat just makes me super endeared. they are perfect. they deserve to be in here. i could write essays about them and my love for their relationship. i just hope they end up happy â„
(they are absolutely disgusting and i love that about them â„ also both ohm and nanon make the best of faces and i adore that)
sorry this got extra long but thanks if you read this far! have a wonderful day ^^
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I donât know if Iâve ever heard of your actual thoughts(tm) on khr, so whatâs your constructive review on the series as a whole? Like some positives and negatives w/ the writing, characters, etc. If u donât feel like answering, feel free to ignore this LOL.
 tl;dr because this is 800 words of nonsense. i think you should know i would not know a constructive review if it bit me in the ass.
my guy i have not done a full read of khr in maybe two years and i know that does not sound like a long time but i have the long-term memory of a fruit fly. please bear with me. luckily for both of us i liveblogged the last time i read so i at least have my own sparknotes jdflaksjddaf
first off! khr is a satire manga!!! i cannot stress this enough, i can and will fight you to the death about this!!! âoh but it gets serious laterâ it grows a PLOT, thats not the same thing. khr is stupid as hell and that is both on purpose and my favorite thing about it.
i fucking love shonen man!!! its all about FIGHTING and LOVING YOUR FRIENDS and HAVING EMOTIONS and. bro im a water sign. my mars is in gemini, there is nothing i can do about this, god made me and said âget that bitch some found family and also some incredible violenceâ and we all just have to live with that.Â
khr is so much all of those things that i did not realize they were being made fun of until very long after the fact so my current opinions are very much not the ones i started with jaldkhjdfhd but man. once i clued in i both loved it so much more and became 100% incapable of interacting with fandom in any meaningful way L M A O
i just. the main conceit is that theyve weaponized the deus ex machina eleventh-hour shonen power up. the âmy dead family came back to life to kill meâ trope is used three separate times. the big bad student body president is a delinquent. theres an entire subset of above magic god powers thatre just
the tyl bazooka was just ripping on the Timeskip Arc until the Timeskip Arc actually happened?? like fuutaâs special thing is that he can communicate with the Meta Planet to divine Character Rankings, i dont know what to tell you!!! the truth is out there!!!Â
like DO YOU EVEN REMEMBER that time tsuna experienced a villainâs flashback sequence FOR HIM because i fucking do, i think about it every day,
so in the sense of âplease critique the writingâ, i cant do that because im pretty sure 98% of all the tropey bullshit is by design. do i wish people like the kokuyo gang got more characterization outside of being ride-or-die villain sidekicks?? of course i do but thats my own damn fault for seeing cool side characters and losing all higher brain function. on the other hand, hibari being the person he is and having absolutely no backstory or motivation beyond âget out of my schoolâ is really fucking funny and keeps me warm at night, so. win some, lose some.
(the 2% of the writing that isnt tropey bullshit that i CAN critique is whatever is happening with kyoko. Bad Female Cast is definitely a shonen trope but its a shitty one and i want it to die. within maybe four minutes of kyoko being introduced she tries to body a man and then thats just never spoken about again?? wheres that energy queen?!!! let kyoko say fuck!!!!)
((this applies to haru too in the sense that all she really does is make moon eyes at tsuna but the way in which she does so is honestly so fucking funny and unhinged that it comes back around to being great. like yeah yep yes maâam thats 100% bonafide Girl Who Throws Skittles In A Puddle And Calls It Potion right there please may i have another))
If khr took itself even 4% more seriously it could be really deep and compelling and i think that frustrates a lot of people, but i think i like it better this way?? half the fun for me is reading in between the lines!! the subtext, however unintentional it may be!!
examples: yamamoto is one of my favorites just because theres SO FUCKING MUCH to unpack about him!! canon gives us a lot of information about him just by virtue of the fact that heâs a Main Character, but paradoxically he himself is never really the focus. he just Does Shit and you have to figure out why on your own and i LOVE DOING THAT.
i dont love mukuro because heâs a fleshed out and nuanced villain, i love him because he says shit like âi went to hell six timesâ and never expounds upon that or âi can definitely trust the information i got from this magic monocle called Demon Spadeâs Super Evil Murder Eye or whatever the fuckâ and then expresses surprise when daemon spade is an asshole. he goes and willfully fucks up the only job anyones ever given him (impersonate 80 year old leonardo lippi) because he Just Has to shapeshift into a young hot dude and hand deliver byakuran, the boss of the Flower Family, the Family that names all its members after Flowers, a bouquet that means âi am in disguise ;) cant catch me bitch ;)â
like WHAT THE FUCK!!
i dont know man. i just like puzzles and khr is a gift that keeps giving.
(sidenote that shouldâve maybe just been the subject of the post but re:i cant shut the fuck up about anything ever, i love tsuna so much. so much. his personality!! his relationships!!! his growth!!! his growth!!!!! his growth!!!!!!! khr has its claws in me because i see tsuna do something cool or brave or even deeply stupid actually and my whole heart goes AAAAAAAAA bc thats him!!! thats my son!!!!! my baby boy whom ive raised since birth!!!!!! suit me up and call me a reborn kinnie, fuck!!!!!!!!!)
#asks#also the hibari-alaude-fon sameface being explained after the fact as 'they are all secretly related'#is the funniest shit#you cant change my mind#unrelated but my khr liveblog spanned like a whole fucking year and its peak comedy#what happened. to my energy.#evi.txt
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hey zira, what are your hot takes on all of the fo4 companions?
Haha, I donât know how hot they are, but I can give you a speed run! (Also I am very excited to get this. FO4 was the first open world game I ever played and just the concept of that and the hugeness of the world and branching story & sudden feeling changes towards me in companion characters totally blew my mind, & it still lives rent free in my heart).
Ada, Old Longfellow, and Strong I /still/ havenât maxed despite having too many hundred hours to want to list on this gameâthe former bc they were DLC, Strong because honest to god I left him at a nice settlement and then completely forgot about him and remembering that I am the energy in this Ryan OâFlanagan video but abt leaving my super mutant in a tiny settlement alone. I will get there! To max affinity I mean. But anyway, I donât truly know those three, so my takes are incomplete. So far though, I really like Ada. She is a good girl just trying her best. Fucks me up I can tell her to self destruct. Even though I feel sure she would ignore me, I cannot imagine ever saying that to her. It was really sweet she was willing to forgive the Mechanist and move on with her life. A good girl. Longfellow I am maxing rn (was last time I played anyhow). I enjoy him. Gruff grumpy old man but he seems quite decent and I like his idle banter and when he sings to himself a lot. Seems like heâs had it rough. Strong I liked. Heâs wild, and I loved how insane meeting him was, and am worried about him eventually understanding poetry and how that might mess up his sense of world understanding. But heâs a chill dude in his own way and I am glad they gave us at least one nice super mutant.
For the companions I actually do know like the back of my hand, the speedrun:
Nick Valentine: Best man on earth. One of two fictional characters I ever called husband. I would die kill or live for him. I want to be 1/4th the man Nick Valentine is. One of the best characters ever period and I adore literally everything about him. It fucked me up early in game where right after he offered to basically risk destroying his mind to help a stranger look for her son, he asked me how I was doing. First character in the entire game to do that. His first companion dialogue is abt how youâre doing TuT. The man is very kind and forgiving and fair, but knows when the draw the line and take no shit. Emotionally mature, kind, caring, longsuffering. Incredibly damaged and broken by life, but holding on and living kindly and to help others anyway. One of the four most marryablen fictional men Iâve ever seen.
Preston Garvey: Brave, kind, sweet man. I would defend him with my life. He really just wants so bad to make the world better and life has been so hard, but heâs still trying. A beautiful and underrated companion and I would throw hands for him on sight. I adore how he whistles. A true and gentle and loyal friend. Take him to Quincy and let him get his justice itâs what he deserves. People who hate him because he tries to get help helping civilians in that game are weak. I love him so much... please give him enough time to reach max affinity heâs so worth it.
Deacon: *To the tune of You Are My Dad* You are my friiiiend! Youâre my friend! (Boogie woogie woogie). Initially, he pissed me off bc he lies all the god damn time, but after we got close enough he actually trusted me, he stole my heart and I would also die for Deacon. Heâs a really good person who thinks heâs shit because of who he was on his past. Also him đ€ Preston: massive survivorâs guilt. They should be friends. Poor Deacon has been the last member of the Railroad like four times, and itâs awful. Help him. Give him love and support. Heâs one of my all time faves. Also, Railroad hands down best faction and if you kill them for any reason other than like a walkthrough route video and I ever get the chance I would 100% clock you in the face as hard as I can, like going for losing teeth, and feel no guilt. I know itâs a game and thatâs wrong, and Iâd be wrong, but Iâd still do it. Also, Ryan Alosio (his VA) saw me do cosplay for Deacon once and told me it was great and it filled me with even more love. Anyway Deacon is great. Also, his whole âThere are other organisations out there. And, in time, I'm sure they're going to spoon-feed you their own patented form of bullshit. Ignore the verbage and look at what they're doing. What they're asking you to do. What sort of world they'd have you build and how they're going to pay for it.â Is one of the like, two most iconic quotes in all of FO4 & just super good in general.
Hancock: Hardcore badass man but also a good dude and a champion for the people. Man really puts his money where his mouth is and you gotta respect that; another favorite companion for sure. Big fan of the way he stabs a guy for you upon meeting, and is a cool leader who organized his crime and does a decent job actually leading. He works hard to help people and bites back hard. Social justice advocate, dangerous man about town, not afraid to cosplay a revolutionary war hero 24/7 & u gotta respect the no fucks given attitude. A chill dude. Like that he fights the institute, hates the Brotherhood, helps the Railroad, and is friends with Nick. Heâs legit af. Also, his VA gives a different answer every time someone asks him about the voice he did for hancock and theyâre funny af.
Piper Wright: A cool spunky lady. Lois Lane on the case, kicking butt, and taking name. Sheâs nice but also hardcore and smart, supportive, fun. A good person. You always get points if you like Nick (which most companions do), and theyâre good friends. Sheâs funny and I love her. A good heart.
Codsworth: Heâs great. Heâs family. Heâs like my...weird brother. Getting to max affinity is heartwarming and also makes my heart go :â-] . Great early-game companion bc he kicks ass and doesnât need stims to heal. I love getting called by my name and think that was a great feature (well, my PCâs name). Heâs a wonderful funky little robot dude and I am so glad he likes me.
Dogmeat: Amazing. A good boy. Doggo of the year. His actor deserved the game award she won. Cute, full of love, and plays with a teddy bear if you give him one. 100/10z
Cait: I like her a lot. Sheâs been through so much shit, and it makes sense she is how she is. I like they actually gave her an emaciated and messy (though still pretty) design, since she is a drug addict. And that they make her main quest about taking that seriously and wanting to get help, and that sheâll call out the player if they fuck around and do drugs in front of her after she gets rehabilitated. Her relationship to the PC if good is really sweet, and I am a fan. I like that while sheâs not sympathetic to synths and thinks they arenât people, she forgets that every time Nick walks into a room and is like âOh hey Nicky : )â. Sheâs a good girl who has been through a lot and still needs time to heal and find herself, but sheâs making great strides.
Robert Joseph MacCready: Human disaster (loving). Homeboy a goddamn /mess/ but I love him. He tries so hard to be cool. I love he makes you pay him to come with, then chickens out and gives it back lol. A fool ball of anxiety and bad decisions and what he thinks brovado is. I wish he, Preston, and Deacon would quit fighting, bc I am always like â :â-] </3 Boys Pleaseâ when they swap out, but I love them just the same. Heâs doing his best, heâs just stupid and a fool. Like Philip J Fry. Keeping his goddamn soldier toy, which somehow is listed as junk instead of sent to Misc with quest items where it would be fine, safe?parylizes me with fear. Iâve lost 2 hours of gameplay reloading an old save bc I accidentally lost it.
X6-88: A more complex one to answer about. Heâs bad, but like, Iâm pretty sympathetic to how he got that way. He was created in a lab and had his emotions mostly dragged out of him in intense psychologically damaging training so he would be a weapon and view himself as an object. I was relieved he chose me over the institute even if he wasnât a fan of the chocie, and think that means thereâs a lot of hope for him. Wish heâd chill the fuck out and quit intimidating civilians for 6 god damn seconds, but I like him. I bring him fancy lad snack cakes home from travels all the time, bc Synths are supposed to like them. Really like that heâs the /most/ sympathetic companion towards Danse in Blind Betrayal, even though he should not be programmed for that, and Danse hated him and made it clear any time they interacted.
(EDIT) Curie: I FORGOT HER BABY IM SO SORRY. I like Curie a lot, despite the fact I temporarily forgot she existed. I stg I thought she was in here. Uhhh, okay. Curie: like her character and personality, HUGE un-fan of both the way her desire to get a synth body is to be âmore real,â as if Codsworth isnât a fully realized person while the same robot type she is, instead of just like. Because it would make her happy. ALSO hate how much of a Born Sexy Yesterday she is, even intentionally in not-determinate affinity talks. Itâs gross. But her herself, I like a lot. Sheâs my daughter and I will protect her. She works at The Castle right now as their on-site medic.
Paladin Danse: I know Iâm gonna take heat for this but honestly? He didnât do much for me. I like that he looks and sounds kinda like Buzz Lightyear, and thatâs fun, but idk at all why people think heâs so hot. Heâs very boring & generic looking to me. Like youâre valid! Taste all be different. But he doesnât do it for me personally in looks or personality. I donât at all like, hate him. Or even dislike. Tbh I am fairly neutral on him. It was funny making affinity with him though. Every other companion I had maxed, I liked more and more with each affinity talk. Theyâd be like âSo my dad was a minuteman and died and I want to honor himâ or âI just want to really feel like Iâm a person, for real, myself, and I am glad I met you, because the good we have achieved together is ours, even if I canât be sure of anything else,â or âMy brother threw the cultural minorities out of our city for clout bc the rich citizens were all racist, and I tried to helpâI snuck them food to the unsafe ruins they set up in for weeks, but eventually, they just vanished, and I still bear immense guilt and self-hatred over not having stopped that.â And Danaeâs would be like âOne time a buddy of mine got kidnapped by super mutants. They turned him into one of them, and theyâre all abominations, so I killed him and it made me really sad.â And I was just like â...Oh danse. I really wanted to like you more. But what the fuck.â His relationship to Haylen is sweet though. And ofc I saved him in Blind Betrayal. I blew up the Prydwin so heâs safe now too, and he lives in the garden by my house and tells me how glad he is weâre friends, and Iâm p into that. Overall, my feelings on him are not strong at all though.
Porter Gage: Not a fan. Like, I appreciated he helped me kill the old boss, sure. And bc I owed him for that, I went to max affinity to see what there was to him as a person. And like, as far as raiders go, he was okay. But he wasnât deeply sympathetic, and heâs a slaver, and if you try to liberate the slaves he and the others own, he /will/ turn on and attempt to murder you immediately, no matter how close you were, so he made his choice, and it was to be a bad person and an asshole to the last. Really enjoyed the VAâs work a lot on him tho.
And there you have it đđđ. Thanks for asking!
#ask#anonymous#fallout 4#fo4#god I love them so much. I was really proud I kept all the OGs too. everyone but Gage. who had to go but itâs his own choice and fault đ€·đ»ââïž#GOD far harbor was a good dlc. itâs like the main quest choice again but way more condensed and twice as f ked up. my poor MC had only#come to terms just before with all the lives she took & started healing#doing bad things she did not want to do & knew he would know about and think less of her for doing. but she did them. đ bc of course she did#then she had to choose between letting the dude she loved be hurt in a way he wouldnât recover from & torpedoing her relationship to him by#she loves Nick and if itâs him or her itâs always gonna be her#I was SUFFERING. a lot. but I also loved it#donât come into my inbox and clown about liking Danse please or Gage. idc at all#like you are welcome to your opinion Iâm not gonna try to convince you /not/ to like him. plz do me the same courtesy & respect my right to#have an opinion u may not like
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Heyo if u wanna talk abt ur ocs can u tell me abt the newest ones (or at least the ones that r new to me which is all of them on the last pic of ur oc post I think?) :3
omggg thank you for asking :3 this is long sorry i havenât organised my thoughts about them yet ahjfklsa but here we go
before i can talk abt rain n evie i have to explain the universe with kes, amaya, and rio. im sure you remember them :3 but umm you said they were based on pacific rim and i donât know anything abt pacific rim fhjlafnj sooo i made a bunch of stuff up. soooo thereâs a parallel universe/alternate dimension full of people and like, monsters. the alt. universe people r testing ways to break into our dimension and open the door permanently so that both dimensions are their domain. the... city...? that the story is set in is like a capitalistsâs dream, split harshly between rich and poor with no middle class. the poor faction of the city that will be named soon is the one responsible for keeping the other-dimension-ers out of our dimension, most if not all of them are responsible in some way for keeping their area safe from those tears in the ozone layer. they in return are given technology, money, and supplies from the rich faction. those guys do next to nothing, they operate like any other city where everyone has jobs and pays their dues to the government. they are very strict about who they let into the city; they donât want outsiders to know about their dimension problem lest they stop the warriors from doing their jobs or do something to make the tear bigger etc etc. they also donât want poor people in the city, even if theyâre responsible for everyoneâs safety. Iâm thinking of making the story a really obvious allegory similar to older-fashioned dystopian novels like animal farm and brave new world because iâm obsessed with those in concept. so i think supporting characters will be one-dimensional caricatures of types of people in society, and only the MCs will have nuance. this also makes it easier for me to write side characters ;3
so kestrel and amaya are siblings mostly born and raised into monster-fighting. you know when thereâs a factory or whatever in town that most people in that city work at? thereâs one of those but itâs like... a firehouse for monster fighting. they mostly live and sleep there, theyâre fed and clothed here for free so long as they fight and theyâre both content with that. Iâm not sure what happened to their parents yet but theyâre probably dead. not everyoneâs parents are dead, some people have families that they live with at the... compound, these two are just tragic and whatnot. families are encouraged to fight together in duos or trios so that loyalty makes them fight smarter and harder to protect each other. when theyâre not at the compound, like if they have shifts off or whatever, they live in an abandoned subway station and steal power from the government whoâs unaware that that track is unused đ
so as far as them as individuals, i kept the planets that u based them off of :3 kestrel is based off mars and mars is the planet of action, energy, motivation, temper. kestrel is moody and temperamental, but their choices are never made without careful consideration. theyâre a quick thinker and that makes them confident, so they never back down from a challenge. they have a hard time masking their emotions and itâs easy to see whatâs going on in their head. theyâre hard to embarrass, though, and theyâre very confident in most of their assertions. theyâre impatient and crabby, but they arenât at all shy.
amaya is based off venus, so sheâs more emotionally rounded than her sibling and more interested in the poetry of life. sheâs very expressive and polite, and she has a thing abt maintaining her image. sheâs a bit materialistic and self-centred, focused on her looks and her space, but sheâs realistic in her material n sensual desires because al things considered she lives in a subway station. she knows what to expect from life, or at least she thinks she does, and is just as confident in her own assertions as kestrel. sheâs stubborn and argumentative for that reason, but her confidence makes her a natural leader and people flock to her for advice and assistance. she loves this.
and adrion, based off earth, comes into their lives later. rio used to live on the rich side of town until a second dimension creature escapes the notice of the warriors (i swear they wonât actually be called âwarriorsâ forever đ) and destroys his part of the city. his family is alright, but the destruction makes him feel like he could do a better job than whoeverâs currently there. he leaves his family to join up with the. the compound, and when asked to find a partner to fight with, chooses amaya and kestrel because theyâre a top-of-their-class team who are always talking about how things could be better. at first, they donât want him bc theyâre lone wolves and they do not like to be told what to do. but heâs a tough fighter and heâs got the motivation to be good, so they let him stay on the team. as far as personality, rio is really chill and understanding, often willing to let other peopleâs faults slide. as long as heâs allowed to do what he wants to do, other people can have their way. heâs cheerier than the other two but heâs quieter and more in-the-background. his strong will makes him sensitive and he refuses to change his mind often because heâs quite naive and gullible, making him easy to trick and take advantage of which makes him insecure. this makes him prone to snapping when people put pressure on him.
now for rain and evie. i originally created them as prototypes for their own narrative but the story seemed really similar to my other stuff so i scrapped it BUT i thought the characters themselves worked in this story instead so i kept them :3. rain and evie are brothers who were initially raised in a fighting ring. they live on the poor side of town but they never worked for the compound. they make a living by gladiator fighting, people pay to come in and bet on them and obviously theyâre paid for winning fights. rain is an extremely adept fighter and usually manages to beat opponents with brute strength. evie is smaller and less physical and usually fights by using the opponentâs strength against them. theyâre simultaneously popular and unpopular in their neighbourhood as theyâre like. cool for being good in the ring but theyâre really weird otherwise. theyâre aggressive, angry and irrational, they act like theyâre always in the ring. rain is more sociable and capable than evie, who tends to be reactive and angry. he doesnât want to be here, but rain is more content in his abilities, so he handles mostly everything so that evie doesnât have to be responsible for anything. they end up moving on from the ring after evie takes on an opponent that rain tried to tell everyone that he could never beat. evie takes a violent blow to the head that leaves him comatose, and rain spends a huge chunk of money for a piece of technology that replaces the damaged areas of evieâs head and functions in its place. no one tells rain, though, that the thing he put in evieâs head is technology from the other dimension. after the two leave the ring, they decide to make themselves useful and fight the monsters that forced them into this life in the first place.
personality-wise, rain is a laid-back, go-with-the-flow kind of guy. he likes to let things take their course and he isnât much concerned with proceedings outside of himself and evie. he purposefully denies himself negative emotion and usually tries to fake that everything is good all the time. despite this, heâs emotional and reactive and extremely defensive. he doesnât like to be challenged or made unhappy and in his dream world he and evie are always just hanging out doing what they want and not having to answer to anyone. people often find him charming bc heâs able to finagle most situations into him getting his way, heâs exceptional with people but he doesnât like them.
evie is more sullen and droopy. he almost always lets rain do all the talking and he usually appears unconcerned with most goings-on because heâs letting rain evaluate the situation. heâs usually inside his own head, daydreaming or fussing. most of his interactions with others are verbal or physical fights bc heâs unsure how to manage himself without rain around and is often willing to fight for whatever he thinks rain would want. heâs independent outside of that, doesnât like to be told what to do or how to act. not even rain can calm him down when heâs on his soapbox because he truly believes that if he had to grow up a fighting dog he should be allowed to do whatever the fuck he wants. in downtime heâs usually a little bit more uppity than rain but still similarly laid-back and willing to act like things are okay.
the five of these characters r in the same universe and they go on missions together often, though kes and amaya donât really get along with rain and evie because theyâre all so stubborn.
next are niko and andre, who i got from sammy! we got urban fantasy going on here, and iâm thinking of setting it in like. the mid 1800-s. iâm feeling spicy. umm so i think the key thing about this universe is that âhuntersâ are a species of humanoid monster. this world is spinning with vampires, werewolves, faeries, demons, etc. pretending to be human in order to survive, and hunters are a mimic species that look human but just... arenât. they have an insatiable desire to hunt and kill (used to be for food but humans make food more easily accessible), but killing humans makes them vulnerable to being found out. killing other monsters is the perfect substitute, plus humans praise them for it. theyâre onto each other but they canât make scenes in human society so they have to dance around each other to do all of their killing in secret.
andre is a hunter living in the shadow of his older sister, angel. sheâs a better, more ruthless hunter than he is, with stronger instincts and a greater prey drive. sheâs popular with people in town and generally just more charismatic. he really wants to be like her, but heâs klutzy and insecure and his instincts are poor cuz he overthinks them. one day he comes across niko in a bar and, perceiving him to be human bc he has 0 instincts, they get their flirt on. until niko says something that makes andre realise heâs a vampire. embarrassed and ashamed of his attraction, andre tries to turn his feeling of betrayal into murderous instinct, and he can turn that anger into his first solo kill. niko keeps chasing after andre trying to catch his non-murderous attention because he actually really likes him and doesnât want to let what they are get in their way.
personality wise, niko is a noisy little wisecracker who likes to be popular. heâs a genuinely nice guy and is famous wherever he goes for being wise and helpful. heâs usually pretty optimistic and very charming, especially in bigger crowds where he can fit in. he can be purposefully oblivious and is very good at disguising his feelings and intentions. heâs witty and sarcastic, often masking negativity for the sake of keeping it light.
andre is a straightforward intellectual type who likes to work and create and achieve. heâs intelligent and steadfast and always strives to do his best (which is why being terrible at hunting is upsetting for him). making achievements kind of replaces his understanding of himself, and not being good at things really digs at his self-worth. heâs not much of a people person but heâs not really shy, either. heâs polite and good-natured, though his feelings are quite fragile.
next generation, same universe, next is honour (whose name HAS to be spelled with the u), journey, and solace. resident throuple. honour and solace are hunters, and journey is human. honour was raised in a big home with lots of hunters under the iron fist of like, the mean nursemaid from annie. they hunt monsters as an organised group, but its a violent institution that doesnât believe in autonomy nor the worth of human lives. humans exist as something to blend into while they exterminate all other monsters. honour stops believing this when she gets older, mostly due to meeting journey. she assumes journey is just going to be vapid and goofy bc heâs a human, but he ends up being a really cool dude whoâs just as in-depth as her and she begins to realise how terrible the lessons she was raised on are.
journeyâs family were aware that they were often surrounded by monsters and as such were very protective of him and his siblings. journey never gets to go out and do things, and being stuck in the stuffy comfort of his home is not what he wants to do with his life when he knows there are monsters out there. when he and honour hit it off, they decide to run away together, deciding to shed their upbringings entirely by changing their names to the things they want most.
i set this in the 1800s JUST so that i could have honour and journey use the train to run away. not nice public transit trains, i mean they are riding the dirty rusty rails to seek a better life. they intend to ride a long time to make sure that theyâre never recognised. on one of the trains they catch to head north, they come across solace, helping him onto the train as he got there a split second too late to catch it. despite his initial gratitude, solace is unpleasant to ride with. turns out heâs been on the run for most of his life and is just trying to find a place to stay where no one will care that heâs a hunter. in human-only societies hunters are known as mimics and are heavily discriminated against if youâre suspected of being one and straight up killed if you are. after living an uncomfortable life and seeing his father killed, solace decides to go from town to town until he finds a place thatâs mostly hunters. when honour reveals theyâre looking for the same thing, solace decides to go with them. heâs hesitant to give up his name because it was given to him by his parents, but ultimately he wants to leave that life behind and embody comfort and. yk. solace.
havenât quite figured these three out personality-wise bc i only finished their designs and names in time for posting the art, rip
and lastly my warriors ocs! I decided to make regular fanclans as opposed to using my existing ocs in an au mostly because i didnât wanna add in random npcs (as it were) to fill the nursery and elderâs den even tho those r important to clan life. so, i made separate ocs, they live in the arctic! summitclan in the mountains, tundraclan in the plains, and glacierclan by the. glacier. the story so far is a murder mystery, cats of all clans are being killed and going missing and no one knows why. while most warriors assume thereâs a bear or fox hanging around the territories, the apprentices saw something while they were hanging out that made them decide to investigate deeper...
our mc is snowpaw, a repurposed rp oc fjdkfjld;af. heâs a summitclan cat and heâs known to be strange and standoffish. he seems cold and apathetic about almost everything and itâs hard to see what he enjoys and dislikes. his secretiveness makes it easy for him to investigate the murders, no one ever questions where snowpaw is going or what heâs doing. with his friends and family snowpaw is a little more jovial, he has very dry humour and is also always trying to help
crowpaw is a tundraclan cat. heâs stuck up and big-mouthed, very arrogant little know it all. donât ever tell him that, though, bc heâs very sensitive and he will cry. he likes to be seen as the best at everything so he dedicates excess time to learning and is actually a very curious and adventurous cat underneath.
swiftpaw is a glacierclan cat. heâs very mature and is often rumoured to be a great deputy choice when heâs old enough. heâs calm and level-headed, a quick-thinking problem solver with a bit of a superiority complex but not one that anyone in his life would be aware of bc heâs so darn polite. the warrior code is important to him and so are rules of daily clan life that reduce conflict in any way.
teapaw is also a glacierclan cat. she, like snowpaw, is a little bit quiet and secretive, the kind of person (..?) that kinda lurks in the back of important things going on rather than offering her voice. sheâs a healerâs apprentice and takes a lot of pride in being effective and efficient with all her duties. sheâs curious and observant, and shes good friends with her clanâs seer, deadhawk (i split the medicine cat position into two for these clans, healers do doctor stuff, seers talk to starclan), so she tends to be up to date w what starclan says, which helps her and her friends w their mystery.
and finally, breezepaw! heâs a summitclan cat and snowpawâs bff. heâs kinda clueless and distractable, very much a follower personality as he likes others to decide whatâs important for him to do. heâs a quiet cat, but heâs not afraid to speak his mind when the time comes. kinda a goofy jokester dude, but he knows how to read a room and keep quiet when he doesnât know what to contribute and jokes wonât help. he likes snowpaw because snowpawâs always confident in what heâs doing and never clowns on breezepaw for not knowing wtf is going on
#this took me so long to type out all the way jfdkslfjd sorry abt that#maybe its been a week and a half who are you to judge#anyway thankie again for asking it was great to tupe out stuff abt them for the first time :D#type* -_-#oc ask#edit: ive just decided that hunters feed off life energy but only as it escapes#that's what drives their desire to kill
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revolutionary girl utena review
ep 1-5
the plot is actually kinda different from what I thought ?? in my mind the plot was: utena was a girl in a princess school who each and every princess would be "conquered" (for a lack of better words rn) in a ceremonial duel by a prince who fancied them, maybe she didnt wanna wanna marry anyone or she liked Anthy already but anyway in my mind utena showed up in the ceremony with duel clothing and then, in a very brave tm like-scene, she would openly declare she refused to be conquered by anyone and tbh I'm not even sure how Anthy would come into the plot... but back into what actually happened in the episodes everything so far is very introductory and just showing what mechanics will be explored further down the line I think?? the op is really good too
also every boy so far reminds me so much of knights of the zodiac?? maybe it's just the design I guess...) and nanami can get these hands, jealousy is a disease and she's the sickest person on earth for all I know
dont ask me why bit I just feel like room of mirrors - gfriend has a very well fitting vibe for it but I'm not exactly sure why hm.... đ€đ€
ep 6-12
ok so why does this school just have random animals around đ I could understand the horse but a bull and a kangaroo?? what ...
touga just says the most random dramatic things and then just casually says anyone who believes in friendship is a fool ?? the guy wouldnt last a day in the naruto universe tbh, he kinda irks me in some way but I'm not sure why so I'll live with this strange feeling for a while I guess
âł okay so watching ep 10 made me especially kinda creeped out, I know I've watched only 10 eps so far but like can he fall downstairs and break a neck or something already ...
also haha what if I watched that bet on it fmv and gave myself a bunch of spoilers would that be funny or what đ this is why i cant have nice things yall.... hope my memory goes to shit when sleep so I dont remember about it this week while I finish it
I feel like the main thing on the episodes are parallels, one way or another I always feel like they're setting up parallels and giving me clues for a bigger picture and a deeper plot arc that is still to come and the bet on it fmv just made this impression stronger, also I wanna say it's done in a good way, one that is both mysterious (??) and "honey you've got a big storm coming" at the same time đ€đ€ much to think about honestly
âł just saw ep 11 and even though I already knew this was coming sooner or later it still felt like crap seeing utena lose to dick head, at the end of the episode when he says anthy was always just reflecting utena's own wishes for himemiya (in another way bc I dont remenber the exact words) it felt like đ bc yes I knew that (the way she was working her thoughts was simply a copy and paste of what utena was saying) at all time I kept those essays about anthy in my head, I dont think theyll be truly relatable to what I'm seeing rn but yeah anthy rights (even though I know you betray/cheat on utena down the line bc of the bet on it fmv but I'm sure you had your own motivation)
âł saw ep 12 bc I just couldnt handle being in a cliffhanger and yeah it happened what I absolutely thought it would lmao not that it was that difficult to foresee but yeah, I kinda liked how utena did it for her instead of being like "oh I wanna save anthy from touga" and treating her like a damsel in distress (I know that's kinda her position as the rose bride for what I've been told so far and that this is a subject spoken about in many many essays on tumblr but yeah) bc so far she's been treated as a trophy and a way to get something else, for the green haired guy it was a way to see something eternal, for miki it was a way to hold on into his "shining thing" and for touga it seems (so far) like a way to manipulate (just like he does with nanami) and just mark his position as above everyone else as he seems to view himself?? man I might be saying random stuff rn but it kinda does makes sense in my mind with the information I've had to this point
ep 13-25
honestly đđ through 9 whole episodes I felt like they were trying to make the side characters deeper and show their hidden face and motivations but it felt so shallow...... not even actually shallow, just not deep enough that it would make me care about these characters and the fact there was no actual build to showing us why we're getting to know these characters backgrounds was just kinda meh too, didnt really help that all episodes had all the same formula and the same timing just for the developers made in those episodes be forgotten at the end and also just that pink haired guy could be like "ah failure again", it felt like watching the same episode over and over again, it was really tiring and like?? girl help I do not care about these characters at all, I feel like it could have been done well (like the keiko ep in comparison to the furuba chapter that deals with the yuki appreciation (??) club president graduating.... the way this ep was done and setup didn't really bring me any emotions) overall not to my taste and tbh I feel like I could have skipped all those episodes except for maybe the miki and juri one so đ
all nanami focused episodes are the worst so far, she's so boring and I cant stand now annoying she is, the diary episode?? the cow episode?? the episode when tsuwabiki fuels with utena?? honestly I know they're trying to show me a better and different side of her but it just doesnt!! work!! bc i feel no sympathy for her, my biggest wish rn is her and touga just disappearing and no more filler episodesđŁđŁ
I thought akio was utena's prince?? but apparently he's just anthy's brother and like.. I'm do done with his little talks with utena and yadda yadda, I just wanna see their duel is that too much to ask I'm dying over here (if this lenga lenga continues until ep 25 i will be so mad bc why were so many episodes wasted on such boring and and not necessary side characters backstories?? idc about them at all man aaaaaaaaaa)
âł ep 25 was good finally we got what we deserve boys đđđđđ can utena just beat up akio already I'm tired of his ass, he exhales both "I'm a feminist I even take women studies classes #herstory" and "if she breathes she's a thot" energy also he has 0 style that mullet is simply horrible I bet there's a hairstylist community who considers him a criminal bc like đ it is simply so bad (q bit less when it's tied up but when it's all lose jesus Christ)
also touga thinks he's suuuuch a genius, sooo smart like king, I do not care about you at all can you shut the fuck up please and can we tall about the pink haired guy episode?? wack. honestly thought it would be more emotional or something, I binge watched 12 episodes with his ugly haircut face and did not even feel a thing he can choke I guess ÂŻ\_(ă)_/ÂŻ
ANTHY TAKING A SWORD OUT OF UTENA'S CHEST??? OSCAR WORTHY KINGSâââand then her lame ass brother being like "oh ho ho idk idk" shut up no one cares no one cares I swear to you no one cares shut uuuuup
ep 25-39
first of all, ep 25 was good but kinda reminded me of the nine episodes (13 until 21) where absolutely nothing interesting happened so I hope I'm wrong also can I just say just seeing the preview of the next episode made me roll my eyes so bad I almsot saw my brain?? bc yeah I'm fucking tired of nanami fosuced episodes she's so annoying oh my god nobody cares about a goddamn egg and much less one coming from her let her die or something pls she's so annoying there's nothing I've learned about her that was not against my own will I'm basically rotting over here đ€
âł ep 30 has me thinking Akio has a foot fetish or something đ bruh leave utena aloooooone I already know your plans and schemes you're not fooling anyone that's embarrassing for u and also... utena you're not very bright are you.... you start seeing every duelist you face with the same exact car and then when you see akio has the same car you didnt even stop to think about it that 1+1 equals 2 ... girl help yourself đ
âł yet again another nanami focused ep đđđđđ even though I do understand her better now I still don't find her particularly enjoyable to watch, call me a woman hater but like. idk she's still a bit annoying to me (but touga is straight up evil and is manipulating her so I feel bad for feeling like that tho.....)
âł ok last 2 eps to go but listen. I thought the akio duel would have happened much sooner, maybe on ep 33 max but well didn't this age well lmao ngl, it did seem a bit too slow paced for my personal taste but also I feel like there's a certain level of drama that comes with slowing the pace down....
âł aaaaaa yall I'm kinda đąđ over the ending omg........... even though it took the best of me to keep going in some parts I still enjoyed the ending aaaaa I thought i wouldnt really like it bc I just usually dont enjoy this type of ending but stil đąđąđąđą wait for me utena đđđđđđđ girl I cried and then anthy walking in the end god utena and anthy holding hands đđđđ akio can suck my dick
there's obviously many things I've missed or that I kinda didnt really pay attendance to so please dont take this serious, I was just writing as I watched the episodes so it's more like a thought compilation than anything, still I can see why there's many essays written about it and why it is held as a masterpiece by so many people
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mannnnnnnn all these theories and all make me want to read more đđđđđđ (no pressure or anything, just be being dumb pls) iâm a sucker for happy endings but this is all just reaaaally fucked up and it can get ever worse... i just wanna give riley a big fat hug and tell baekhyun to fuck off and look what he has done, bc itâs the same exact thing haneul did to him in some sort of way??? idk she hurt him beyond repair and he hurts riley and even melody?? and all his friends with his behavior so... i think riley getting her happiness, self love and maybe some spicy one night stands, AS WELL AS NEW FRIENDS and baekhyun getting out of his mess, his family and his demons with therapy and then finally reuniting them would be CHEFâS KISS but idk bebfbdjfjdjfjf knowing you, riley could be pregnant rn or some of his exâs and then the rest is history JSJDJDB
(Here comes another long response because I am bursting with in love with Six Phasesâ theories energy!!!đđđ)
All the theories make me want to write more asdfghjkl I love them đ Happy endings are my guilty pleasure, like yeah you can bring me and the characters through a world of pain, but no closure??? No way for them to move on with a lighter heart? It crushes me to the core!! Anddd thatâs why I donât read angst đ
if I do Iâm in the mood to cry.
Itâs a huge mess, from start to finish. But Riley sensed this coming in a way, sheâs talented at knowing when trouble is over the horizon... but she didnât pay attention to the warning signals this time. She thought things were looking better only for it all to crash and burn, just as she feared it would.
She didnât deserve any of this. Despite her own flaws, her doubts, her issues, and the demons of her past, time and time again she chose to reach out for Baekhyun instead. Even in the middle of her crying, she chose him over herself so she could be there for him. So she could understand him. She just wants to love him, and heâs not putting in the same effort - not even half of it! Not even the most important part!
Communication is a reoccurring theme, it can make and break just about anything. Friendships, relationships, business deals. Speak your mind, be open with yourself and with others who choose to share those sacred truths with you.
Iâm rambling again oof - back to the topic! đ
huhuhu đ€ dear youâre in for a treat with what Iâm âcookingâ up in my drafts. 17 scenes is a lot of ground to cover, and with my luck, it will be another long journey within itself. Thatâs what Six Phases does to ya đđđ
I have a confession - or more like a few đ
There will be a happy ending, but at what cost? There will be another man who gets close to Riley, but who will it be? How will it go? How will it end?
Endless possibilities, and if youâre curious about who will be coming along... hereâs this ask that I answered last month for reference đ„°Â
Anon O.o you are so clever! What the heck, are you tapping into my mind or what? Stop it, there are spoilers galore in there đđđ you notice the look Melody and Baekhyun shared at the table?
âŹâ©âȘâ©
âI still donât understand why you broke up in the first place.â Mr. Byun grunts, wiping his mouth with a napkin.
Baekhyun and Melody share a knowing look, and the emotion in both their eyes has my food coming back up.
âŹâ©âȘâ©
These two have history waiting to be revealed. And damn will it pack a punch đ€
Speaking of Haneul, yes, Baekhyun has become the person he hates. Itâs just like bul*ying, you know? The mean guys beat up the little guy, the little guy beats up a smaller guy... The cycle continues over and over when no one is brave enough to admit that, âHey, someone fucked me up and instead of getting help imma keep it all in and do the same exact thing to cope with my trauma.â Misery loves company, folksÂ
This is so deep, I can go on all day, Iâm- đł
To be honest, at this point I wonder if Riley will let anyone in... New people or the ones she has seen take Baekhyunâs side in this. (And, hey, do you want 40 more characters introduced in the next update? I donât think I can manage, Iâm barely keeping up! hehe) If nothing else, she needs to work on herself before getting involved with anyone else - one night stands has me wondering though... Hmm... Once upon a time (6 months ago) I considered such a thing. Iâll keep it in my thoughts >:)
Baekhyun needs help, if he keeps going on like this he will bend and break until heâs so broken nothing will be able to fix him... Letâs hope this painful breakup has made him realize his mistakes đ
I love happy endings, and these two dating each other even with all their flaws. They are chaotically beautiful in love, in hate, in everything when they come together. But they are growing up now, the world expects more from them, and they should expect more from themselves. They need to accept their past, present, and move towards a healthy, long-lasting future. For themselves, and everyone around them đ Growing pains hurt, but why not make the end result one worth hurting for?
Oof sorry for this long response lovely đ
I got knee-deep in my story musings - also! đ€Łđ€Łđ€Ł I love how you think. I have a habit of creating these angsty scenarios, huh? hehe đ„°đ Thank you for commenting~~ Hope you like what comes next đ€đđ
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The Perfect Date (2019) dir. Chris Nelson
summary: To save up for college, Brooks Rattigan creates an app where anyone can pay him to play the perfect stand-in boyfriend for any occasion.
2/5 stars
Spoilers, duh. This oneâs the dictionary definition of meh, so if you decide to read this in lieu of watching it, youâre not missing out on much.
The Perfect Date starts with Brooks writing his first (of many, many, *many*) drafts of college app essays to Yale, of all places. âShoot for the mo, because even if you miss youâll land among the stars,â eh? The first thing I noticed was that every sentence in Brooksâs essay sounded like it belonged in one of those âIntroduce yourself to the class in 5 sentences or lessâ assignment. You know, the ones you get in every year in English class from grades 2-8? They were dull, bland, and unoriginal. Youâd think an Ivy-bound student would know the difference between traditional and overused. Oh wait, with Yaleâs 7.1% acceptance rate, there is none. You have to be unique and avant-garde and witty and risk-taking and *you have to be somebody*. Not Brooksâ line, âWithout vision, we succumb to the average, and what I want is the extraordinary.â Guess the writers didnât have much of a vision for their screenplay, then, huh?
The movie also makes it appear as if his only strong suit is his grades, since thatâs the only thing theyâre constantly talking about. When going to college admissions office, he should know more than to spew his numbers. If youâre really dedicated to Yale, you have to know itâs not all about the numbers.
Speaking of relevant numbers, unlike Brooksâs SAT scores, Yale tuition for the â19-â20 school year is approximately $43,000. In a few months, Brooks earns about 3/10ths of the money he needs, based on the MyTraxx app Murph creates so he can see his progress towards the end goal. Brooks earned about twelve thousand dollars in 3 months from taking girls on fake dates. Iâm not saying itâs unrealistic, but exactly how much would *you* pay a stranger to take you on a fake date? (itâs unrealistic)
Shelby, Brooksâs initial love interest, is made out to be the dumb rich girl for the entire movie, painting her as a shallow puppet of her parentsâ money. Brooks pretends to be rich in order to impress her, and miracle of miracles, she believes him despite his terrible responses to her rich-girl questions. We hear her casually mentioning how many stylists and makeup artists she needed to get ready for the winter formal, and making shallow comments behind peopleâs backs. Then for some reason, when Brooks comes clean about his identity, sheâs suddenly such a great, enlightened character who tells Brooks sheâs better than him because *sheâs not a liar.* Why bother making her out to be such a one-dimensional character when she actually has a holier-than-thou attitude to top it all off? Nevermind that she kisses Brooks when heâs straight out of a (fake, but real to her nonetheless) breakup. At least she does not lie. Layers, people. You can be rich *and* honest.
This is a bit of a petty complaint, but about a fourth of the way through the movie, Brooks whines to his father, âI havenât worked my ass off for the last 3 and a half years to go to a public college.â I mean, I get it. He wants Yale, and only Yale. But implying that people who attend public school donât work just as hard as you do gives Brooks such a bratty attitude. Itâs as if heâs saying that he should get everything he wants because he tried to stay awake in AP Calc BC. The sheer entitlement just rolls off Brooks in waves. Maybe thatâs why he had Shelby fooled for most of the movie.
By the way? Eat the rich.
Brooks is paid to take a girl named Celia to a school dance. Celia is, coincidentally, rich, and gives Brooks the idea to create the dating app in the first place. She first appears in black combat boots and a scowl, and she is refusing to wear the high heels her mother wants her to wear to the dance. I mean, if that doesnât tell you all you need to know about her character, you must have missed out on a significant part of 2010s young adult contemporary. She was, as my brother would put it, âsuch a raging feminist .â God knows we needs feminism, seeing as to who weâve so intellectually elected president, but. But. Celia felt like a caricature. She felt like a trope. She, in fact, felt like every single ânot like other girlsâ trope mixed up in a hard cocktail served with flashing eyes and a burning internal monologue and a hatred for all things pink, served in a gunmetal grey flask with a âBeauty is Brainsâ sticker on it. I might be a bad feminist, but God, I hated her, or at least how she was written, for the first half of the movie.
I also got heavy TERF energy from Celia. When she is driving downtown with Brooks, they begin talking about an anonymous street artist named Trashbug. Celia goes, âHeâs probably just some bored, privileged white boy,â and rolls her eyes. Iâm not sure if youâve noticed, Celia, but youâre a bored, privileged white girl. You can tell that she honestly believes sheâs so much better than Trashbug because she doesnât spray-paint mediocre, avant-garde art onto dumpsters. In reality, she probably spends her free time moodily posting on Reddit about how Transformers 2 is sexist. I could also totally see Celia being Trashbug, because she has no passion, for anything. At all. Sheâs completely surface deep, so it would make sense for her to be a secret graffiti artist the entire time.
My favorite line from this movie directly follows the above. After admitting to Brooks that sheâs afraid to show her true personality, Celia goes, âOh god, if anyone actually heard me saying this.â I mean. Wow. How brave she is, to be telling this all to Brooks, to be trusting him enough to do so. What a significant indication of the closeness of their relationship. Simply an artistic line, packed with such raw emotion and honesty. What an executive decision that must have been made to allow this revolutionary dialogue into this scene. Truly a remarkable line.
Half of the banter between Brooks and Celia sounded unbelievably scripted and horrible, and the other half sounded natural and flirty. We got disgusting, fake-deep conversations, like how Brooks is like vanilla ice cream because he seems basic at first but thereâs more subtle part to him. No idea what the hell happened there, but I did like the chemistry between Laura Marano and Noah Centineo, and âVanillaâ is a cute nickname/inside joke.
I really, really sympathize with Brooksâs best friend Murph. Even in the summary, when Murph is the one who codes and produces the dating app, Brooks gets all the credit for the app. Nothing for the black, gay, nerd (onto whom the directors seemed to shove as many minority traits as they could for the sake of ârepresentationâ). The friendship arc constrains some of the most predictable lines and concepts Iâve ever seen. When Murph is worried that Brooks is going to start drifting away from him, Brooks reassures him âIâm not gonna make any new friends.â and you just KNOW that heâs going to ditch Murph, for the girl or for the popular kids. How could he not?
As much as this movie was predictable and blah, there were a few gems that made me snort because they were just. So bad. So terrible. My favorite bit went:
Dudebro: âWhaddup, Rattigan? Italian sub on wheat, no tomatoes.â
Brooks: âItalian sub for the Italian guy.â
DB, not missing a beat: âIâm Swedish.â
#noah centineo#laura marano#the perfect date#netlix original#netflix#movies#bad movies#shitty movies#shitty movie review#to all the boys i've loved before#high school#lara jean covey#my writing
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May 21: The 100 2x11 Coup De Grace
Itâs late, my computerâs more tired than I am (and hardcore hates me and very well may decide to eat this entire post who even knows), and this is probably a bad idea but Iâm gonna do it anyway.
Or at least start.
Another episode, or partial episode, of The 100.
This opening torture sequence makes me so uncomfortable. Which like I get is the point but tbh Iâm just not into âlook how unflinching we are at the realities of Bad Stuff.â Especially when my tired computer is skipping and the sequence becomes, like...trippy. Trippier.
This is probably a super bad idea because my computer literally cannot handle video lol. I am going to restart it.
Itâs actually kind of nuts that Montyâs been missing for 2 days and Harper even longer and Jasper and Maya are like âthis is weird and upsetting but I guess weâll find them somewhere!!â Well, Maya more than Jasper. Mount Weather isnât THAT big.
âYou have to look like nothingâs wrong. Like everythingâs okayâ is so sad. I think itâs situations like that that make S2 my favorite, just b/c Iâm a sucker for scenarios of enclosed tension. Like, forget war and blah blah blah, I want this, like... secretive, spying, being spied upon, uncertainty. Thatâs the real horror in a satisfying way.
Gosh his haircut is awful though.
When does Clarke learn to ride a horse?
I have literally no idea whatâs happening bc I rewatch these eps so infrequently.
Clarke just got âyes maâamed.â I find that semi-hilarious, not because sheâs 18 but because you knew Grounders used words like âmaâam.â
I love Clarkeâs single-mindedness. âWe canât stop for water. We canât stop for anything. Weâre on a mission. And Bellamy might have called!â AWWNH!Clarke is so OOC lol but she has a different background okay?
Iâm not really in the mood to trust Abby about anything. Does she... actually make good decisions? I feel like youâd have to track her through all of the seasons but I am inclined to say...perhaps......not.
So the Mountain Men tried to assassinate Clarke and Lexa. Completely forgot about that.
The introduction of Echo. I just... I just have no opinions on her, I guess. Literally my only opinion is that she should have been the Ice Queen and, not being the Ice Queen, sheâs just not interesting to me. I will say, she couldnât have been in Mount Weather long if she knew who the Sky People are, as theyâve only been on the ground about a month. But also...why does she hate them? They were only fighting with Trikru, and Azgeda territory isnât even, like, in the vicinity.
I love Dante but he has some major balls looking Jasper in the face and saying he doesnât know where his friends are. I mean, he doesnât, because Cage stole them, but how do you just MISPLACE people in a 600,000 square foot bunker? Where COULD they go?
Iâm sure Iâve said this before but as someone who went to a high school with a uniform I find it HIGHLY unrealistic that all these teenage boys tuck in their shirts and keep them tucked in all the time without exceptions.
Jasper being protective of Monty <3<3<3.
So it was MW that told them there were no Ark survivors. Did I know that? Did I forget that? Not that it matters as my Clarke/Maya fic is done lol.
Dante is the most Hilarious and Wonderful of all of the attempted father figures on this show I said what I said--theyâre all terrible but at least he bring the Weird Father Figure energy to 11. Iâll lie to you but itâs to protect you, call you son (always weird), super good at self-defense--ah-ha! sword at at your neck!
âThis is not a toy.â If the sword is in MW itâs probably Important and Famous.
IMO and I completely stand by this assessment, itâs harder for Jasper to be brave than it is for other people, and he was really brave, and it worked, and Iâm proud of him.
I realize this is also a problem with the literal world but we actually do know that torture isnât effective so Indra being all upset that sheâs not allowed to torture Emerson is just so....exhausting to me. Like Clarke isnât suggesting not torturing him bc she loves the high ground and must walk it at all times. Sheâs suggesting not torturing him bc the last time she tortured someone, she got 0 good information. And even though neither of them know it, it was the shit information garnered from torture that led Finn to TonDC! Also if they had let Emerson die, the Grounder would have also still died--itâs not that they chose to use resources on one and not the other. They had two different types of wounds. I mean I guess if theyâd brought them in faster without patching up Emerson in the field? Thatâs probably what she meant. However the Grounder Death Cult and their complete willingness to declare their fight over at the merest papercut makes me again less sympathetic to this point of view.
Iâd literally already forgotten that someone tried to assassinate Clarke like an hour earlier. Abby doesnât need to be concerned about that, lol, Clarkeâs used to it!
Okay first I did have a longstanding headcanon that Echo had a crush on Bellamy going way back--I mean thatâs practically canon, yeah?--but now Iâm super convinced because in their second scene together, he sacrifices himself for her using information she gave him (that MW takes the loud/strong looking ones), even though she greeted him by spitting in his face, and actually, that was very heroic and selfless of him. Iâd fall in love too.
Second, I thought she had no tattoos because sheâs a spy or w/e but I CLEARLY see tattoos on her legs. And they are not white either.
I donât think I ever realized that Maya found Bellamy because she was in the infirmary/harvest chamber looking for Harper and Monty. I do not have a good memory for each scene leading into the next. AND she think sheâs found them when she sees how fast the random patientâs treatment is working, because that has to be a Sky Person and she would never guess Bellamy.
They really do just talk about their little torture machine casually all the time. âI need to go over the treatment schedule so I know how many cages to clear.â
Hey so like how did Maya get in if sheâs not cleared for this facility?
What a wonderful time to remember yet again that if Bellamy knows who Maya is from her reference to Jasper, Clarke, who saw Maya and Jasper flirt like ONE TIME, must have told him about them, which is cute and funny all at once.
Maya: âI wanted to see what was so special about him, but... heâs dead.â Bellamy: Ah yes! Iâm dead! * immediately closes his eyes * Why am I laughing so hard at this?
Good thing they take dead bodies down slowly instead of just thunking them on their heads.
Maya, Bellamy, and Echo v. Lovejoy is a pretty satisfying fight. Also, what did Clarke just say about Emerson talking b/c they saved his life? Echo helps Bellamy because he saved her life. Sometimes you get more flies with honey.
I tend to forget that Bellamy literally strangled this guy with his bare hands. Like it was self-defense to some degree, in that this had to be a fight to the death, but it was also just pure fucking rage. Like he said, he (like Clarke for a while) wants to kill everyone in the Mountain.
And then he thanks Echo and asks Maya if sheâs all right. A True Catch. Tbh I could see something forming out of Echo and Bellamy here, but not after some of the later twists and turns in the later narrative.
Honesty, Iâve always loved Maya but... letâs just appreciate her, shall we? That was horrific, seeing someone she knew killed in front of her--and helping, because she knew he was on the wrong side, even though that was the same side sheâd been on her whole life. Is she completely in the moment, or is she already seeing that thereâs no way out for her here? That the people theyâve brought into the Mountain are really going to destroy it?
Bellamy coming out in Lovejoyâs clothes looks like a kid trying on new clothes at the mall before the new school year. Except heâs just dumped a body down a trash chute.
Like âIâll come back for you, I promiseâ--I can see a basis for a ship in that. So far it is 100% built on how Echo would have to be dumb not to fall in love with Bellamy but still.
This Maya and Bellamy scene is amazing. I love every aspect of it.
Lemme just...watch that Jonty hug on repeat.
Honestly they even ended the scene with them walking out the door together even though thereâs no way anyone could have moved Harper that fast and thereâs also no indication of who moved her or how. Guess sheâs...not that important...?? LOL??
Kane has only two modes: fairly ineffectual bastard or utterly ineffectual neo-hippie. âYouâre not grasping the situation! Weâre nice! Be nice to us!â I probably shouldnât mock him bc he is me lol, I also would not know what else to say to Emerson other than âplease????â but still. Common sense and peace and love would be great but those arenât shared values I guess.
And then he goes 180 to âletâs torture him then?â
What you should be doing is good cop bad cop. Or like, wearing him down with repeated questioning? I heard thatâs an effective interrogation technique, although here Emerson has a certain advantage of time and that his interrogators are way more easily annoyed than he is easily worn down or confused.
Anyway I remember now. Clarke ultimately solves this problem with that ultimate BDE moment, sending him with a message and 6 hours of oxygen. She really is just the Smartest.
At least Kane acknowledges that the Chancellorship is a completely random title since Abby literally just kinda stole it? Like Jaha is the rightful Chancellor and Kane is the second-most-rightful Chancellor and sheâs just sorta...there? But it also doesnât matter because as established, Clarke is the one actually in charge.
This Bellamy and Maya elevator scene is also the kind of tension that I like. Is Bellamy...legitimately considering shooting him? In the elevator? That would end badly lol. He has this idea to just start randomly offing people in public/enclosed places, while Lexa is all like âwe canât save TonDC bc it would blow Bellamyâs cover!â like the irony.
I wonder if the MW classes are like...to some end, like, mandatory schooling that must be completed, or if theyâre just like for funsies? I think the second, partially because itâs an âExpressionist classâ which doesnât seem like the Three Rs and partially because this dude doesnât seem upset that Maya didnât show, like heâs just vaguely wondering where she was.
âWeâve accomplished great thingsâ in that tone is like the MOST American thing I have ever heard. (I can say this because Iâm American.)
âWeâve been bleeding people to stay alive for generations. Thatâs our legacyâ is true in the sense that Danteâs line in the sane is...truly in the sand. But also has it been âgenerationsâ? Iâm not sure you understand how time works, show-as-a-whole. I mean maybe this is technically true? They probably discovered Grounders like....50 years ago? Which is sort of âgenerations.â But when you say it like that it makes it sound way longer.
You wanna root for Dante over Cage because heâs on the side of our heroes but in terms of like bitter logic Cage has the advantage. What theyâve already done and what Dante has managed to rationalize to himself is bad enough. Theyâre already Doing Bad Things, doing yet more bad things isnât going to bother anyone. Especially when these extra bad things (1) come out to the same--torturing/killing people and (2) lead them to a permanent home on the ground.
I wonder if Dante/MW justified what they did to Grounders with stories of them being like...irradiated mutants. Like literally inhuman. So it âdoesnât count.â I mean objectively theyâre wrong of course but I mean in their heads. And then for Dante the line is so obvious between killing radiation casualties and killing just normal humans like themselves, whereas for Cage--who sees the Grounders more because of Cerberus, and knows they donât look that much different, that they are also just people underneath the masks and big clothes--sees no difference between the Grounders and the Sky People, and if heâs already sullied himself by using one set, he can continue sullying himself, for a greater cause, by using the other set. Itâs just a question of which story youâre telling yourself and how much youâre willing to lie.
The plotting of this season is, overall, very good. Especially in the second half.
I think Clarkeâs default mode when stressed is order giving. Itâs part of the control thing. Sheâs okay if she has everything under control, and if she knows everything, and when she has all that knowledge and control it just...spills out of her, directing people with what they need to do and where they need to go.
Whereas Ravenâs in full âfalling out of love with Clarkeâ mode.
Also I think Clarke is very quick to comfort people and she is genuine in this but because she ALSO has her agenda and her strident tone and her controlled demeanor, it can look like manipulation. Or at least, if I were her friend, I would always wonder if she really cared or if she just wanted me to calm down so my emotions werenât in the way of The Plan.
My 15 second Raven, Clarke, and Octavia scene. Lemme just rewatch this a bunch of times too.
âJackson found genetic marker anomalies that can only come from someone born on the Ark.â Remember when people were theorizing that this was a big deal in some way? The Arkers were genetically modified to withstand space? I remember that being a theory. Anyway in retrospect, itâs just a Plot Device. Possibly a Pseudo-Science Plot Device I would not know.
Never mind. âWe were genetically engineered. They werenât.â So it is in fact canon, just meaningless canon. HOW IS THIS SOME RANDOM THROWAWAY LINE?
Clarkeâs feral moments are the best.
Itâs cute how Abby continues to think Clarke isnât in charge.
Having Bell run into Lovejoyâs son is cheap but effective. I still remember that scene and I can really feel the full effect on him through Bobâs acting and the music. I also always remember that line âWhat did you expect youâd find here?â Because the answer is obviously âmonsters.â They had their simple narrative too: about how MW were the bad guys and thus they could destroy them all and it would be vengeful and feel good. But itâs more complicated than that: everyone in the Mountain is complicit in terrors. But many of them passively so. Bellamy was ready to kill all of them, and so was Clarke, but he changes his mind based on this encounter, tells her about it over the radio, and makes HER change her mind and in fact change her entire plan, by the time she explains it in 2x15.
And itâs sad for Maya too because Bellamy is being aided by her but she is still a Mountain Person. Itâs easy to say âsheâs an exception, sheâs Jasperâs friend, sheâs our friend.â But sheâs done everything he hates the Mountain for. If the whole Mountain is evil, sheâs evil. And to the extent you canât be both pro-MW and pro-Sky People, sheâs put in this impossible position of choosing sides, or trying to switch sides abruptly. Bellamy sees that, and itâs like yet one more additional layer to his guilt over what he did, because he sees a new angle to how it affected Maya, without whom heâd be dead.
Jonty the leader couple. And Jasperâs face when Monty says âWeâre not safe here.â
S2 is my favorite bc of plotting like this episode: just as the 47 are about to leave, Cage stages his coup. Just as Bellamy is about to see his friends, the doors lock and theyâre trapped. The moment when Jasper sees Bellamy--with absolutely no reason to believe this could even be possible. In trying to plan fics that use S2 I tend to get confused about the plot bc it goes back and forth and circles around a lot, but in actually watching it, itâs quite effective, and I think part of the circling confusion is just bc there are so many moving parts, people need to be in the right places at the right times, meet and separate at the right moments, so it can read awkwardly in summary. But they did a good job ultimately, I think.
Another thing about S2 generally is that even though itâs much more expansive than S1 in terms of locations and number of characters and groups of characters, ultimately almost everything revolves around one story (except for the CoL setup stuff), and 2 main locations that have meaning, with various points in between. So it is more concise and more centralized and more meaningful than later seasons, which become increasingly spread out and disjointed. Or so I try to explain to myself at 1am.
Yaaaay emotional Princess Mechanic and then Bravenlarke. I live for these moments when characters are just like...emotional together.
I donât know if I find it realistic that Clarke would be like âitâs overâ so fast but nevertheless I like Raven and Bellamy picking her back up.
Clarkeâs relieved face...sheâs in love.
Bellamy: Iâm fine. Me: Heâs a liar!!! But I guess they can talk about his emotions later.
When theyâre all together, theyâre all better. Like immediately. Even Clarkeâs âRavenâs going to help youâ with a little look to her, like, this isnât an order, and Raven nods....
I love that Bellamy took Mayaâs expression to mean âItâs not a problemâ when it quite obviously meant âItâs a huge problem.â But also Clarke smiled for .05 seconds so I think she knew he was a-lying. This could be a sitcom if it were a totally different show.
Weirdly, I watched part of 2x15 again for a fic I decided not to write atm and...they donât actually use the Grounders as a Trojan Horse army. Their plan NOT to kill everyone including the kids meant basically that they used their real army as a distraction and then just took the inside-Grounders out the back way. Or that was the idea. Which in retrospect is actually kind of disappointing.
Clarkeâs power walk through the hallway with her Grounder Entourage is just so....satisfying. This is the emotional payoff that got me into this show.
Clarke just literally staging a coup against her own mother, using the Grounder force that sees her as a leader, is so.... I feel like I have never appreciated it before this rewatch. I think in the past I found it kind of annoying tbh. But this time I like it a lot more. I like Clarkeâs just insane levels of confidence and self-assurance. It is a good look.
First of all the parallel to the Wallaces. But more importantly, I always wanted this big story line of Delinquents Versus Arkers that never fully came as I wanted it, but this is pretty close, where sheâs just used to being in charge by now, so you know what, she is. And the only thing she needs to make her desire for power real is muscle, which she has, thanks to Lexa, so she uses it. Itâs also very satisfying. And should ultimately have been the groundwork for the delinquents to form a separate community but WHAT DO I KNOW?
All that said, and this isnât contradictory, but Clarke picks like the MOST inflammatory way to go about her plan. She just does it, she gives no explanation, she stages a showdown at the gate with her own Mom the Chancellor. There is a subtler way of doing this. But I like that she didnât do subtle because itâs IC for her. Itâs IC for her age (who is more Dramatique than a teen?) and itâs IC for her place in her heroâs arc: under Lâs influence, sheâs becoming big-headed, leaning into the sin of pride, here in the form of âI do can do no wrong,â and by 2x16 in the form of âI can do no right, no one has ever been more wrong than I, no one has ever been more sorrowful than I, let me perform penance in the woods.â
Pride: the most annoying deadly sin.
Anyway.
And Kane, who always bows to the Alpha Female in the room, immediately enables Clarkeâs Drama.
âLet our people go and weâll let you live. Itâs just that simple.â
âThe Grounder army is bigger than you think and the acid fog canât hurt themâ is honestly a bluff though? Because again, they do not use or even PLAN to use the inside Grounders and they DO plan to take out the acid fog so??? I guess the point, if she was protecting Bellamy, WAS the bluff, WAS the distraction.
I think it was unnecessary to take out his O2 but I guess sheâs really just showing off, which again is IC and I guess has the purpose of showing MW she means business and is Not To Be Fucked With. Still, it is important that her message make it to MW since itâs the distraction Bellamy asked for, so it seems like something of a risk to make it hard for the messenger to arrive home safely.
I do like that she gets to use that classic retort âThat sounds like a you problem.â
And so.... I meant to go to sleep like 3 hours ago, and my power is flickering. Time for bed. The end, goodnight.
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BEASTMASTER
playing with names. zh'ang, bastardization of the romanization OF a translation meaning warsong, but i was just trying to find something that could sound gith so that doesnt really matter! he never goes by this tho, as his subordinates just call him master, sir, or boss. i think he would be very private about his life before joining a company (one i havent plotted out yet, though i like the idea of whatever mercenary crew heâs apart of following the idea of using assigned nicknames or titles in place of true names, even amongst the non-magic users, just for their safety or rather the integrity of the company so that their private information canât easily be used against them).
yiz'shi, same bastard deal, this time im thinking beastmaster could be something he gained before joining a company and he just translated it to common. im not sure if the gith would have a need of surnames. i assume theyâd be like uh âconan the braveâ or whatever, a sort of similar idea iâve establish for my goblins where their surnames are based on trade and can changed based off merit, and their first names are given after a personality begins to appear. i think gith may be given names, then a âthe braveâ or âunholyâ may follow depending on how they choose to live their life.Â
zizshangi --> yizshangi --> some sort of mix between warsong/beastmaster. perhaps his true name is obscured and not even his minions know it!
im thinking he will be a shadow monk who uses his telepathy to rise in the ranks! i dont like multiclassing but i also really want to incorporate aspects of a whisper bard into this character or at least one of his underlings. i think after coming out of slavery under some mindflayers, he joins the company that frees him and starts using his monk training from the astral plane to...not convert, but to translate into the way of shadows. he would recruit the help of those who others overlook, such as kenku, kobolds, gnolls, and goblins. heâs very quiet, very observant, wears a mask often and even when he doesnât he pretty much as a complete poker face. He chooses his words carefully but does relax around those he knows/trusts, and has a sort of dry sense of humor. Despite his psionic abiliities heâs sort of like, an idiot socially and canât actually read people all that well. he relies on his extrasensory input and Maud (explained below) to navigate relations mostly. Iâm not too sure what he looks like yet! I do want him to have the sort of vaguely asianic features a lot of githzerai have however, and i have a monk outfit in mind based off some Absolver outfits. Heâs worked his way up in company rank enough to become a sort of espionage expert within the troops! This has earned the ire of some other company members, but for the most part i think this mercenary group would be pretty civil and view each other as respected associates and comrades.Â
His main crew consists of two kenu, two goblins, and a tabaxi. Heâs known the tabaxi longest-- im thinking she was also an underling in the company who helped him get back on his feet when they picked him up. She was a teen looking to hone her skills as a rogue and he helped her learn the art of stepping lightly and always keeping an ear to the ground. Looking at tabaxi names Iâm thinking she probably has some dumbass one like âquick of pawâ but they just started calling her Maraud, which turned into Maud LOL. Sheâs all black and has short, sleek, shiny fur, brownish/maroon irises, pointed ears and big paws with her claws usually unsheathed. Sheâs become a mastermind rogue who trains two (also totally black, yellow eyed) kenku twins as a thief and scout under Beastmasterâs tutelage. Sheâs very streetsmart and has a gravelly sort of raspy voice from years of working as a slave (able to rise as a slavemaster who was tasked with yelling orders to the other slaves and cracking the whip). Sheâs a bit matronly, very wry and slinky and coy, and very good with people. Typical scorpio but with a flair of aires determination and single mindedness. Sheâs very driven, but has the life experience to keep herself grounded and logical. Sheâs beastmasterâs most trusted associate and essentially the brains behind his crew, at least second to him. Sheâs the boss when heâs not around, but while strict, she has a HUGE softspot for her sort of adopted siblings. She gets along well enough with the rest of the company.
The two kenkus are fraternal twins, a bit younger than Maud, named Lasher (girl) and Bowstring. Lasher is the thief and Bow is the scout. They were orphaned and picked up by the company shortly before absorbing the refugees from the Mindflayer slaveship so they never really had birthnames afa the company was concerned. They speak through sign language, body language and gesture, facial expressions, and a sort of quick-hand morse code theyâve developed from both thieves cant as well as the company cant. They canât easily speak to people outside the company, and even within the ranks they have trouble communicating without parroting, which they donât seem to like doing unless itâs to mock someone. Their inability to speak, however, lends to their spy nature as people often underestimate their intelligence and perception. Though they canât fly, theyâre quick when racing across building tops and through tree canopy and prefer high vantage points to preform their work. Beastmaster is a very silent person who gets along well with these two, using his telepathy and patience to forge a mentor relationship with them and cultivate their infiltration and investigative skills. Lasher loves to read anything she can get her feather little fingers on, and often steals what she canât buy. Sheâs not too girly but does enjoy fantasizing about the high life noble ladies lead and likes to collect trinkets she thinks represent this such as bows, perfume bottles, bits of mirror and buttons. Bowstring likes to help his sister with her plights but is much more grounded and serious. heâs dry and sardonic and takes himself a little too seriously. even for a mute, heâs very silent and a little shy and prefers to hide behind Maud or beastmaster or even Lasher. He getâs his name for his skills as a ranger, whereas lasher gets hers from her talons and tendency to use them when people get too close to her or her brother. she gets along better with the rest of the company however, and likes to be seen as cute even if she feels sheâs being condescended on. she and her brother work spectacularly together, along with beastmaster and maud, and donât mind being separated for missions or otherwise.
The two goblin (identical!) twinsâ names are Fritz and Racket and they are, respectively, a storm sorcerer and a storm barbarian! obviously theyâre not as subtle as the rest of the gang despite being gobs, in fact they get their nicknames from their quirks of being loud, aggressive, and favoring a sort of berserker approach to confrontation. Fritz is the caster, Racket is the muscle, and both feed off eachâs other whole uh, storm bullshit. they both worship an elemental goblin deity but very very casually, itâs more of hero worship, and beastmaster sorta thinks they might have a touch of wild magic and a fixation on LOUD and FLASHY shit hence the storm kick. theyâre very loyal, very brave, and only a little stupid. they both have tempers and donât like comments about their height. very easy to bait into confrontation especially if theyâre together. theyâre not the kinda twins who walk together in unison and finish each otherâs sentences (like the kenku twins, who similarly work off each otherâs energies for their work), but they are usually together and look almost exactly alike. Fritz is a bit slimmer and taller, a bit pointier and a bit more spastic and shrill. Heâs weaker than his brother but is smarter. He also has a worse temper and despite not being a melee fighter, will not hesitate to tackle anyone and just use his claws and teeth. Racket is a bit calmer but dumber, more gullible, and a lot stronger. Heâs only a tad quieter than his brother but is also more physically aggressive and tends to stomp and throw shit around, hence his name. he usually followâs frtizâs lead if beastmaster isnât around, but the both defer to Maud for instruction. Theyâre technically younger than the kenku twins if you account for the fact that goblins age quicker than kenku, theyâre only slightly older! theyâre more immature, however, and usually need more corralling than anyone else. unlike lasher and bow, fritz and racket dont like being seperated, but usually dont have to be since they donât do much espionage. if they are dispatched for such tasks, itâs usually a matter of blending into busy, or sketchy environments rather than being silent and shadowy. theyâre useful for intimidation, distraction, firepower, and muscle.
the last notable character iâve cooked up is a kobold, the youngest (but again due to kobold age, its not like hes a baby technically) named Rak! heâs not very skilled in anything but he considers himself an inventor and makes really pathetic little stick contraptions that use like. shitty venoumous bugs and stink bombs LOL. i dont even know what class heâd be. no magic skills, too dumb and loud for espionage. heâs sort of a little mascot for the company and everyone treats him like a pet, but beastmaster took pity on him and lets him tag along with them. fritz and racket think hes funny and usually just throw him in a bag or like, if they have to fight, put him in a pocket till theyre done. he doesnât get in the way too much and every now and again is a bit useful to get into super small places or to do errands like deliveries or shopping or cleaning. he got his name bc he makes a sorta RAK sound a lot when scared or startled or hurt or excited or mad. like a mouse goes EEK but heâs a stupid lizard guy so he goes RAK!
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VUD paladin headcanons!!!!
BTW this is based off of @voltronuniversaldefender âs reboot!!! CHECK THEM OUT THEYRE DOING GODâS WORK
also i have read approx 2 headcanons and baRELY understand this AU so if there are similarities to anyone else or inconsistencies iT IS AN ACCIDENT AND IM SORRY
anyway this is just about the 4 confirmed paladins BET ill be doing more about Faârah/Takashi/Zahi/Ashanti once i know a bit more about their roles in the team!!
Alvaro Garcia Valladares
he has a twin. i don't make the rules, but he has a twin.
he has a big family. the biggest family. weâre talking, his mom has 8 siblings and his dad has 9 and thereâs a 10 year age gap between him and his oldest sibling and he loves them all so much
natia is his best friend. i repeat, NATIA IS HIS BEST FRIEND!!!!
heâs also quite close with kiki. Natia and Kiki are the only two that he met before their great space adventure
he wasn't really sure of his sexuality at first. (i say this because i wasn't sure of my sexuality at first - im bi btw - and all the media i saw told me that any lgbt+ character was 100% sure of their sexuality form the day they were born, which made me doubt myself bc i didn't figure it out till recently, so i wanna see that in some media!! sometime!!) he probably figured it out halfway through having a crush on someone
the someone is akio, and he definitely tells Natia about it first
ânatia... natia listen.... I have a crush on akio. freakin akio.... what do i do??? Iâm bi, natia... I'm bi. what does this mean -â
âalvaro, I'm so proud of you, but this is a public bathroom and akio is right outside -â
GUARANTEE that the first time he saw Akio he just basically wanted to fight him but also flirt with him and had a slight moral crisis and ended up doing nothing
he is a goddamn sharpshooter, okay. he straight up becomes famous for it throughout the galaxy.
yet despite that heâs still insecure, and those insecurities prevent him from really getting together w akio until much later
he comes off as very suave and extroverted when you first meet him, but underneath it all, heâs actually really warm, personable and funny: not that anyone outside the team know thatÂ
aliens on social media, probably: god, the blue paladin is so cool... i bet heâs amazing and awesome and eloquent...
meanwhile, alvaro: do u guys think i could fit my whole hand in my mouth or nah?
enjoys memes, and shares this love with kiki
basically an all around great guy. because he often felt like a seventh wheel at the beginning of the formation of the team, he always tries to include everybody as best as possible, going way out of his way to ask after people, even if they forget to ask about him sometimes :â)
Natia Nanai
first off: what a gorgeous name. seriously. incredible kudos, my dude. anyway on to the head canons for this gorgeous girl
probably alvaroâs soulmate. already mentioned this, but it needs reiteration. they are best friends
had a large family too (not as big as alvaros tho) and probably major relate to him with that big family dealio
v close with kiki. they complete each other on a technological level.Â
natia is very, very creative. she and her sweet engineering know how are always instrumental in getting the Team out of tough situations
Akio: theres no way out of this weâre going to die -
Natia: bet?
she does say âbetâ a lot. like, almost too much? but she's always right and valid when she says it
the villain: iâve got you now!!!!
natia, under her breath: bet
the paladins, thinking: thank god, weâre saved
very soft but also badass as hell. she has a unique duality.
pulls a violet baudelaire: she puts that GORGEOUS hair up in a ponytail when doing work or whenever she has an idea
everyone on the team, regardless of sexuality, is low-key in love with her because sheâs just so nice. no one can hate her. she's way too solid of a friend
speakinG of being a great friend: natia is 100% the secret keeper up in this bitch. everyone comes to her because they know sheâs got the best advice around and will take their secrets to the grave
akio: idk man... alvaro is just rlly cute, u know?? but i can't tell him...
natia, thinking of alvaro literally whining to her about akio not even five minutes ago: christ
the mom friend. she always has all the things everyone needs on hand or in her lion, and sheâs got it all going in terms of chore charts and family meals. she is the queen of figuring out times for team bonding and everyone loves her more for it
definitely started a board game night asap
she has a silent bravery about her that no one else can match. despite her trepidation, natia will always do what has to be done for the greater good.Â
she is guided by her heart and her morals, and is easily the kindest person on the team
bc of this kindness, she is often the diplomat when conflicts arise between people on the team
she is seen by the general public (aka the galaxy) as a strong, morally righteous woman. kind of like rosie the riveter-esque??? sheâs the symbol of justice and fairness.Â
aliens: she's so... peacekeeping :0
natia, at kiki: throw me that wrench, or so help me god -Â
basically, a queen who always considers everyone and works really hard to create a family, even when they're all so far from home :â)
Kiki Evans
generally over it tbh
âalways tired, but always inspiredâ - kiki, on being asked why there were dark circles under her eyes
kind of standoffish. sheâs not really about being nice, she's about getting the job done, and that can rub people the wrong way, since she is always the first to offer up the cold, logical solution
but underneath that, sheâs just a computer science nerd who is loyal to a fault
she really is loyal. its almost dangerous sometimes, because she would put the universe in danger to save her friends, which actually comes into conflict with her typical cold, logical approach.
she has 0-1 sibling. she's every bit the single child. she cannot relate to living in a big family setting, and at first its hard for her to deal with before she warms up to everyone else on the team
she's a genius, and thus found school to be tedious. in fact, she got fairly bad grades, as she wouldn't do the work that she saw as pointless and boring
she is a meme connoisseur, and loves to quote vines, often assisted by alvaro
kiki, as they approach a giant black hole: HZZK
alvaro, catching on immediately: is... is that real???
she is a conspiracy theorist, for sure. the government is watching us all, trying to make sure we don't learn too much.... sheâs sure of it, and akio is too
tbh, the first proper conversation she had with akio was about cryptids and how the government had hidden them from the public
she was friends w natia and alvaro from before, but it is akio she becomes closest with the fastest. in some ways, she feels more distant from natia/alvaro bc of how close they are with each other and  bc all of them have known each other for so long while akio is someone she got to know recently: he has no preconceptions about who she used to be, and she has none about him
plus, she and akio relate on many levels: both trans, both gay, both autistic, both theorists, and both loyal to a fault. she finds a real blood brother in akio :D
very openly gay. very. she's a space lesbian, and theres no denying it
kiki, meeting some random space girl: oh
kiki, moments later to akio: god I'm gay
akio, downing a glass of water but acting like its vodka or smthg: god, same
the public sees her as the cold and calculating techie, the brains of the operation
natia is her partner in crime. they finish each others sentences. they've got a tech connection going, babey
kiki: if we just cross-reference the zaiforge tunnel with the -
natia, nodding: particle consummator, of course weâll get the perfect -
them, together: amount of energy!!!
everyone else: sorry wot
basically, she's a tech goddess with a splash of genius. she's uneasy and a bit awkward, but thats just bc sheâs never been in a situation like this before. after literally 1 second with her, she opens up and is such a loyal friend. :â)
Akio Himura
wow this boy is gay and he knows it
he loves his parents (zahi, takashi, and ashanti) but god he will never admit it. not ever
alvaro, after listing his parents, 20 aunts and 100 cousins: and i love them all so much, with all my heart. what about ur family akio?
akio, not wanting to show weakness: they're nerds.
alvaro: um okay cool good talk haha :)
akio, internally: but i love them nd would die for them tbh... but i can't show weakness
he's so guarded after his biological parents left/died/disappeared. poor boy
definitely a single child, and definitely adopted
his parents love him SO MUCH. so much.
akio: why do i have three parents, dad?
takashi, almost crying: its simple. u deserve so much love, that it couldn't be contained in just two people. we needed three. its how its gotta be, my beautiful, sweet summer child
a yeehaw kind of guy. he grew up in the midwest riding horses before his biological parents died and theres a piece of him that will always be a southern boy
the kind of kid in school that pretends heâs a delinquent, but actually just has the aesthetic of a delinquent, and is truly soft
akio: hell yeah I'm a rebel. i logged onto disney.com without my parents permission
kiki, choked up: so brave
mothman is his love. his passion. all cryptids, for that matter. kiki is more of an all around conspiracy theorist: akio is in it for the cryptidsÂ
heâs a bit awkward, and doesnât totally understand all social cues/jokes. because of this, he stays away from memes, and is very guarded when meeting new people, especially after experiences with light bullying for not only his social ineptitude, but his upbringing.
considering that, his first meeting with alvaro was supremely awkward, and akio accidentally fought with him multiple times before they established a solid friendship
akio, having a gay panic: you are the light of my life
alvaro: sorry what??
akio, panicking more: I said, you wanna fiGHT WITH A KNIFE???
he pined after alvaro from basically day one, but had the foresight to actually know that he was pining, unlike alvaro who just floundered
of course he would never say anything
he is a stabby boi. he is unrivaled in swordplay, and enjoys routine. his natural affinity for picking up new skills plus his unrivaled work ethic basically DESTROYED everyone else when it came to swords
heâs loyal af and is always the first one to take action. akio is a âdo something. do anything, but do it fast before we lose a chance to do somethingâ kind of guy
the general public sees him as the fiery one: heâs the one with the fanciest footwork in a fight, and heâs very good with battle tactics. he can come thru with that strategy at the perfect times
he's a low-key emo. for sure. he loves MCR, but strangely dislikes other similar artists like p!atd and fob.Â
kiki: but...brendon urie, akio....
akio, sipping tea: as a gay, i can appreciate the aesthetic. but no one can compete with MCR
kiki, exasperated: its not a competition -
basically, a slightly guarded boy with a real talent for defending the universe and his friends, but also an emo cowboy mess who is in love with alvaro and loves everyone :â)
WELL THAT ENDED UP LONGER THAN I EXPECTED. I HOPE U ENJOY AAAA
ALSO FOLLOW @voltronuniversaldefender !!!! its amazing, guys, really check it out :D
#vud#voltron universal defender#i love them asadjkdflkKL#vud headcanons#I HOPE YALL LIKE THIS#alvaro valladeres#natia nanai#kiki evans#akio himura
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yyh rewatch number 11 WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO MY KIDS NOW
been a few days bc I am BUSY AFÂ irl, and I made it through the dr ichigaki fight--just barely without tears--by watching with a friend. now weâre at episode 35 and watch straight through to 42, and I canât help but blog about it because HELLOOOO, NINJA BABES
guess whoâs here
itâs jin and TOUYA BITCHES
kurama recognizes them, I wonder if he's actually fought them before
I remember that hiei and kuwabara both get taken out of the fight, but canât recall if genkai does as well
what I figured out when my friend asked why koenma knows genkaiâs younger face is that since she was on a mostly human team in the past, she was probably one of the special guests at the tournament? and thus a member of a team koenma technically ownedÂ
itâs upsetting that toguro didnât seem to recognize his EX GIRLFRIEND.
jin speaks so quickly I can hardly understand him
itâs like merida in the new wreck it ralph trailer, just.. irish
ps JERRY FUCKING JEWELL again, for those keeping track
Iâm gonna go ahead and mark yusuke and jin down as a ship now before I lose control
also, jin and touya
ship count: 8/400
I should really make a list of whoseâ who in that count lol
oh yeah, hereâs the medical exam, I remember it
her hair is gorgeous I would marry him if she asked
WOW she doesnât even take kuwabara just genkai and hiei
a barrier master
and sheâs just
oh man she took her coat off and I melted
STOP ELECTROCUTING MY KID BABE
epilepsy warning for this whole arc
koenma youâre a jerk
jin decides to fuck off because he doesnât like fixed fights, bless him, heâs a terrible shinobi
demon makeup cool. not cool? the FUCKING RACIST image in the back during the explanation. I SAW that feathered headdress, togashi!!
kurama isnât BOTHERING to attack because heâs observing
and hiei tells us why kurama is going to be fucked
jin is so done with this subterfuge bullshit
the audience is eating this up and touya speaks at last, my love, my darling, my short spiky blue beautiful man
I would kill to be able to put on makeup that perfectly, that easily
I know how kurama finishes this fight, but my friend canât remember. I love it, this is so good.
âwith his hair??â she asks, shocked
âonly an amateur depends on arms and legs for victoryâ--kurama, with a whip coming out of his hair
âHow is he controlling that?â
âWith his spirit energy?â
isnât there more behind why this guy is trying os hard? theyâre not being blackmailed are they
oh.
thereâs more, the patterns--
fuuuuck
and of COURSE his reiki is sealed, and as long as heâs standing--goddamn
wait
touya fights an immobilized kurama?
I donât remember that!!!! son of a BITCH
âhow will yusukeâs shattered team surviveâ asks the narrator. âThis is badâ says yusuke
this is not good
I hate that kurama seemed to observe that gamaâs paint was made of blood but didnât like. pay attention to it?
friend just punned:Â âTouya is a cool dudeâ
Iâm screaming she hates puns
one of the black black club just asked sakya why he is sharing âAss spaceâ with demons. fucking. what.
why does the committee want yusuke so dead, when they invted him? I guess thatâs the whole REASON they invited him, ugh.
genkai tries to be optimistic for the first time in this series, and kiei shuts her down immediately
ohhhh the shinobi just need attention so they keep getting jobs
koto freezes to death, itâs very sad
touya somehow thinks a theif canât keep running.. and seems to be right
ârunning like a baby is perfectly brave if the odds are uneven enoughâ--Koenmaâs words of wisdom
such an inspiring leader the spirit world has
doesnât he smudge the seal withhis own blood HEY he does
I am remembering these things seconds before it comes into play
touyaâs attacks are honestly amazing
koto is a bit twisted
kurama plants something in himself, and then thatâs what holds him immobile for the next guy right?? the big one yusuke kills
why doesnât touya know who he is??? I thought, if they called him a traitor, we could ASSUME they knoew who kurama was??
why was touya blishinâ?
the ICE SWORD man oh man one of my old old old old mary sues had that attack
oh yeah there it is, the arm wound, he plants it in that
âson of a frickin bitchâ--yusuke urameshi
Koenma: Why do I get the feeling our most intelligent fighter is about to do something incredibly stupid?
Kurama: Let me do what I must... *does something stupid*
touya decides theyâre friends now, so he wants to kill kurama painlessly
is
is touya fucking DEAD
oh good heâs alive
but also itâs not good
oh but okay kurama won
three more then
I know kurama vs. bakken is terrible
kurama also thinks theyâre friends
faint heartbeat
amazing
ah, bakken
I hate him
âa fighter standing in the ring cannot be removed agains this will. as will cannot be determined...â
hatred
hiei is ready to go to war for his man
how is that motherfucker even a shinobi
yikes that last shot of the ep is absolutely awful
yusuke promises the audience that of he goes, it will be with a bang. I remember more of a whimper when sensui kills him.
who is that last guy on team masho? I remember bakken, and itâs clearly jin, but the third one, I canât remember
BAKKEN JUST BITCH SLAPPED KOTO
yusuke is my BOY
I love him
this âkill the traitorâ count is just. horrible
kuwabara is STILL out for the count
kick his ass baby boy
yusuke is my hero
why is uh. bakken sweating so much
mist made from his own uh. sweat. thatâs pretty nasty
yusuke: I hate saunas.
I donât remember this fight taking even this long???
yusuke has such great eyelashes
boy is already so like. pumped to fight jin.Â
yusuke just used eighth grade scienceâyou can get on your hands an knees and start begging.and maybe, just maybe, Iâll listen.â--yusuke urameshi
KILL HIM YUSUKEÂ
heâs ready to commmit murder and itâs amazing
jin didnât even flinch
âThatâs a pretty good fightâ
kuramaâs gorgeous and also awake
heâs making plant jokes and I hate it
I STILL DONT REMEMBER THIS RISHO BITCH
look how great these kids are.Â
I DID remember about rukaâs barrier thing healing hiei
no way jin canât fight first if he does how does yusuke fight him SECOND????
âIf I win my whole teamâs screwed and if I lose I have to fight again.â
jin is amazing. seriously. also, can these boys get married please?
you know Iâm a multi shipper rightÂ
well that was a fun match, sad itâs over
jin is just
such a happy guy I love it
they call them brothers but really the chu thing is much closer to that
âass spaceâ bbc guy now claims to pull the tournament committee by his the âass hairsâ
so quick!!
kuwabara seems insistent on the fact that he is âspiritually awareâ in situations where he lacks that talent to actually observe
yusuke lands exactly one punch and jin floats up to let the impact wear off
âHey, I needed that!â says yusuke when his spirit gun is deflected by jins windÂ
jin thinks heâs very funny
heâs right
why is boan lashing out at kuwabara, when sheâs supposed to be TREATING HIM
somehow Jin with his irish accent--or rather, Jerry fucking jewell with his irish accent--isnât triggering at all lmao. maybe because this is how I prefer him
yusukeâs hero eyes, at it again
how many reigun shots does yusuke have left?
jinâs so good at fights I love him so much
âsomething always comes ot me at the endâ say yusuke about his battle stretegy
hiei
genkai, sarcastic: you truly havbe a way with women, hiei
JIN IS HUMMING LOVE HIM
yusuke plans to try the spirit wave, somehow forgetting his shotgun move???
shizuru once again knows exactly whatâs up
bless the kuwabara family sixth sense
itâs so weird how genkai is speaking in third person
have I mentioned how much I love Jinâs eyes?Â
yusuke call shimself a freak because he enjoys fighting
okay weâre back to who the fuck risho is???
if jinâs the official captain---
oh my god I just screamed when risho revealed himself and dropped my laptop holy shit
like a gut punching, throat-tearing godawful scream.Â
âITâS YOU!!!â
oh my god I donât reember anyting about him other than earth and rocks and how much I HATE HIM
does he fight kuwabara? yukina just showed up trying to get in to see the tournament, does she heal kuwabara for this fight?
touya comes up. does risho attack him? that would explain why I hate him
yusuke defends koto, who he doesnât like
hiei
i love
these two children are so angry
lkjlkjdasdflkjsadfkhjsdfasdf;lkjsadf
shizuru finds yukina and recognizes her from watchign that video, bless her
girls helpinâ girls
kuwabara was never technically ruled ineligible to fight, and I hate life
ginger son, donât do it
he is so goddamn fucking helplessly sacrificial
yukina, go inside and heal your goddamn boyfriend
yukina is looking for her brother, oh SHOCK
shizuru intimadates an entire crowd of demons
her legs oh my god
just wait kuwbara, your girl with healing powers will be there soon
kuwabara is doing his best
keiko gets hit on by a bouncer and murders him
shizuru once again takes out a demon
can kuwabara shizuru marry kino makoto please???
risho is a dick
koto is clearly a sado-masochist
hiei GET OUT OF THERE
ruka is just like. a fetish indulgence of the artists. I know sheâs hot but how long are they going to draw this out?Â
koto: Iâm goign to take the ocunt now, so everybody make sure to tell me how Iâm doing it wrong, okay?
savage
START the DOUNT KOTO, heâs OUT of the ring
shizuru WRECK THEM
oh yukina has ptsd flashbacks when she runs into toguro
sakyo lets shizuru escape bless her
kuwabara prepares to sacrifice his ENTIRE FUCKING LIFE and becomes telpathic?? bless
kuwabara canât imagine what to say to yusuke, who means so much to him, goddamnit
yukina is in the stadium, babies
YOUâVE GOT TO BELIIIIIIIIIIIIEVE IN THE POWER OF LOOOOVE
IT GIVE MEANING TO EACH MOMENT
ITâS WHAT OUR HEARTS ARE ALL MADE OF (just look inside)
oh my god
amazing
âThatâs my girlfriend!â--Kuwabara Kazuma, aged fourteen
yusuke is astounded by his boy
koto isnât counting either of them
SPIRIT SWORD
GET IN THE RINGÂ
damn kuwabara
I canât beleive he did it thatâ s an highly unlikely triumph
hiei
âSheâs... really here.â
Kuwabara bonds with yukina while keikpo and keiko FINALLY talk
KILL HIM BABY GIRL
pls get married
t;dr I would marry shizuru in a heartbeat if I didnât know she was meant for sailor jupiter
shoutout to @batmares!!! thank you ever so much for joining me today for the Urameshi vs. Ninja arc of the dark tournament saga!
#yyh#yyh rewatch#jin#touya#genkai#hiei#kurama#kuwabara kazuma#team masho#team mashotsukai#gama#angst#dark tournament arc#dark tournament saga
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what is kissing various ccuers like? find out
vivian: awk af and will force ur hands up to touch her face. altho thinks its 10x more hot for u to just touch her lips not actually smooch her. might end w her trying 2 like eat ur hand killian: hes a dad. also divorced 2 times. so weird is an understatement. also full indiana dad semi-aftershave beard so double awk. altho if u like that good on ya. needless to say he kinda is occupied w trying to eradicate humanity but he makes time exceptions 4 u. lips taste like regret and $5 cedar lake beer c(d)r: again awk as hell. high energy tho. prefers little 'muah' pecks. if on lips: redbull and coffee. makeouts r rare but cdr isnt rly a ~sexy~ person (lawyer). would love love love if u initiated smth further tho! but if u are not comfy thats ok :) xiang: gravity increases in a good way like when u get underwater so far & water pressure does that thing it does where you just feel .zip'd. soft lips rating = 12/10 kris: dont try to be sexy and bite his lip you might catch his lip ring and that hurts him be careful :( otherwise also p awk but in a very endearing way pre gb emerson: apyr :) post gb emerson: his lips taste like broken dreams, expired yogurt, and porn. 0/10 but he likes to shove his tongue down ur throat and if u find that hot congrats. also will use his es. just enjoys the idea of escalation. rly hard to 'just' kiss him bc if he wasnt already horny for everyone its ESPECIALLY bad for u. ender: doesnt know what human affection is but hypothetically will not have an understanding of being normal. will try and succeed to hurt you. if you dont like it he wont be affected (MEAN!) unless he cares abt u (partner on his quest for revenge). if you like it congrats hes not abt to go bdsm and hurt u unless u ask tho eva: not interested in romance but you're special :) at first shes eh to the idea of making out bc tht takes up time but it grows on her. likes human intimacy ig. kisses are very sweet and very nice :) 20/10 jacobi: smoker so not great. also doesnt shave so not great. kinda awk and not rly in an endearing way either. you have to teach him. but hes trying ok???? juno: electric! loves kissing thinks the idea of smashing faces is weird but also AzanPog. will like it if u run ur hands thru his hair so do it :) ruth: has never been a romance guy post-HS and frankly has naught the time nor energy for it rn (except for u). so hes just kinda rusty. likes to be guided and told what to do not in a weirdo way just ig u gotta let him know cos he needs to know ur boundaries if escalation. otherwise hes super nervous. will maybe surprise kiss u if he is brave! :) holo 0302: kiss -> makeout -> devolves into (if you so desire) hard and heavy fuckin. cant really control itself enough to stop UNLESS you give the word/it senses u arent having a good time. otherwise its rly possessive of u. always wants to be the instigator. always tries to get ur clothes off as fast as possible lol tour: AWKKKKK but it is ok. she isnt for pda or hell even private da so moments are rare w her. u have 2 initiate. super duper rusty also lips chapped af. not rly one for making out tho. sometimes u get insecure like oh does she not love me and the answer is no, she does, just bad at showing it smop: weird she doesnt rly care abt romance or face smashing at all. also unphased by 99% of advances or innuendos or anything remotely romantic. have 2 tread carefully w her. first kiss probably 6mo after u started dating but shes like huh i thot we were jus rly good friends. its super sloppy and she has no idea what shes doing but its ok cos its endearing rich: need i say anything. its perfect every single time. pure euphoria. rly good kisser too. ur welc johanna: messy & sloppy af because she insists upon not initiating intimacy unless shes super inebriated. she doesnt want you to overwrite trevor in her mind so she just hopes the alcohol will get rid of the taste of ur lips. doesnt work. first sober kiss is still weird and shes rly hesitant. u got 2 feel it out w her. takes a looong time to escalate since shes uncomfortable but thats ok. when shes at that point then o ya she loves nice long chill makeout sessions. probably with the caveat that every so often she takes a massive swig of beer (remember to work out this idea with her beforehand as to not overstep boundaries). lips obvi taste like beer. sooo much jack daniels. nikolai: will never initiate intimacy. u have to sit him down and tell him its ok but he still wont. loves it if he is never in control of the scenario. would love it even more if u escalated w/o him asking and hes afraid to ask. but if u eventually deprogram him he might initiate sometimes. kisses are super weird hes not used to em. whys his mouth taste so salty wtf? clara: very clinical. she is not by any means a romantic. but still nice tho since any intimacy is a good act of opening her shell! issac: CHEFS FREAKIN KISS BABY. better than rich. even if u just have a fling u will never ever find anyone who can even just smooch u like he does. filled w emotion and also hes super nice ig so :). handles u so carefully not in a fragile way but in a loving way. mouthtaste for sure some kinda minty flavoure. or a nice wine :) reina: she makes u feel so safe. thts all i have 2 say. u are Held ingrid: are you crazy? schuyler: actually not as bad as one might think. prefers u to initiate. obvi used to be a heavy smoker and drinker so he is kinda bad for the mouth ya feel. acquired taste for sure. if u like southern men, congratulations. dr.w: go grandpa go jim: would start happy crying if u asked if u could kiss him. then would say no. ur gonna have to wait a LOOOOOOOOOOONG ASS TIME to kiss him. just be patient. notice that his acts of intimacy are skewed towards nonphysical- hes a great listener and is very attentive to u! those are good :)
#IT IS A DELUSION A PERSONAL CREATION PERSONAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#textpost
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