#she’s not dead I just am obsessed
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Me? Systematically finding every photo I can of Marcia Marcia Marcia as Joan Cusack instead of getting ready for bed? It’s more likely than you think
#there’s also like 3 videos I’ve found but you can only put one video per tumblr post (homophobic)#but I will go back through and screenshot Marcia’s part or screen record my favorites and give them their own moment in the sun#anyways she’s so cute :)#and I miss her so very much :)#she’s not dead I just am obsessed#anyways Marcia return from the war (not posting)#drag race#rpdr#rpdr 15#drag race 15#marcia#rupaul’s drag race#RuPaul’s drag race 15#Marcia x3#marcia marcia marcia#debbie jellinsky#addams family values#addams family#joan cusack
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do you ever think about how in the literal very first scene with Rebecca, we learn that Unit Bravo had no idea she even had a kid
she chose UB and The Agency over the detective so consistently, so frequently, that her team didn't even consider that she had some kind of life outside of them, with someone waiting for her at home
#twc#Rebecca I am obsessed with your brain#like N and F especially are so moved by the ideas of family and normalcy and having a home to return to#i just want UB to really sit with the idea of what the detective missed bc their mom chose to be their handler#twc rebecca#the wayhaven chronicles#wayhaven#Rebecca's grief and fear and sense of duty melding into one giant nightmare creature of work-life imbalance#I've been contemplating what a rebecca & mc relationship would look like if rook hadn't died#much to consider#the rebecca lore is making me insane the more i think about it#like if anyone was going to have any inkling of Rebecca's personal life it'd be UB and theyre like 'child?? dead husband??'#she trusted agency sitters enough to watch the detective but never let even hinted her own team that she had a kid !!!#idk im rambling now
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What is it with fantasy high and girls dying before their lives ever began. How we can never really know who they are, or who they could’ve been. Brennan Lee Mulligan I will find you
#ramblings#fantasy high#dimension 20#fhjy#fantasy high junior year#lucy frostblade#yea yea this is obviously about Lucy. but also..#um#penelope everpetal#(collective booing from the crowd)#(I am dragged off the stage)#jokes aside tho#they both have that quality of haunting a narrative (Penelope specifically in the seven and Lucy in fhjy)#they’re gone. their stories are over. and yet#they have a hold over the ones they left behind#we will never truly know Lucy past anecdotes and old stories#penelope was an array of false faces and honestly? we’ll never know her either. all we’ve got is that old picture of her and Sam#and obviously Lucy was kinder. she definitely didn’t deserve what happened to her#while you could argue Penelope got what was coming for her#but the fact remains#Lucy Frostblade and Penelope Everpetal we’re both teenage girls who we can only catch glimpses of. forever#in some ways#they’re the same. dead girls who never fully leave. their ghosts still visible in the corner of your eyes#anyway rant over I’m just obsessed with d20 girls and I can draw parallels from anywhere#I might make a more… comprehensive post about this one day who knows
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did anyone order some butch4butch payneland?
#i am a firm believer in butch!edith payne#wearing her hair up and short; pants instead of skirts more in death but as much as she could get away with in life; just generally gnc#cause if edwin was 'unusually' feminine and that's what got him killed- then it would only to make sense to mirror it for edith#i'm obsessed with them#edith payne#charlie rowland#payneland#dead girl detectives#dead boy detectives#edwin payne#charles rowland#my art i guess
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My birthday was a couple days ago, and I got to see my bio dad for the first time in a while. He surprised me with the fact that I have a little half-sister, whom I've never met and who was adopted about two years back. So, I wondered if any situations in BB mimic this or have a theme of "secret siblings" or "secret family"? Sorry if this is a weird ask; this blog is honestly just such a cool little place and I love the way you approach the subject matter and take the flawed misogynistic foundation of the WC books and make them so much better (JUSTICE FOR BUMBLE!!!). I've also learned a lot about healthy and unhealthy relationships here and am really glad for your deep dives on Squilf and Bramble. Thanks, Bones!
Not weird at all! I really like exploring all the little nooks and crannies of complicated familial dynamics. I think one of the untapped strengths of WC (that the writers seem to be unaware of) is how their MASSIVE cast allows them to present all sorts of unique dynamics. So I like to pick up on it, since they don't.
For secret siblings...
I'm pretty heavily leaning towards Ambermoon being adopted by Wildfur, as a surrogacy. Something feels correct about it. Especially since Icecloud is getting retooled into a post-Battle of the True Eclipse birth, and a major supporting character in AVoS-era stories as a friend of Alderheart.
Thinking about it, I should zoom in and expand this. Maybe have Icecloud, somehow, acquire forbidden knowledge that would invalidate the Queen’s Rights and he (transman) struggles with if he's going to use it to expose his parents as an excuse to help Ambermoon.
(Especially since Ambermoon and Icecloud are basically nothing alike. Amber is independent, bold, and vain. Ice is jessie pinkman big-hearted, disorganized, and deceptively meek if you look past his "chill" demeanor)
But that's wip-- there's also Breezepelt and the Three, who are going to have an actual friendship. In particular I can't unsee Breeze and Lion having a deep one. I know I commit the Cardinal Sin of borderline himbo-ifying Lionblaze in BB, but I can't help it.
Hollyleaf ended up nabbing a bunch of his most violent roles to make her villainous descent smoother narratively, so BB!Lionblaze's story ends up being more focused on Ashfur's abuse, comic relief with cats in other Clans (something that the very serious Jay and Holly have a hard time providing), and the emotional fallout of the big reveal and Bramblestar's turn on them. Breezepelt slots neatly into that.
They were friends. Lionblaze's whole life came down around the reveal, everyone looking at him and his siblings differently, like they're suddenly something terrible. Why can't we find a silver lining, Breezepelt? Why can't we call ourselves brothers if the whole world is going to do it anyway? So much is changing, but THIS doesn't have to, we will take their weapon and turn it to armor, my ally, my friend, my brother.
(and when Breezepelt is lashing out at the three because of the Dark Forest's influence, Lionblaze is there, taking the blows and trying not to give in to the impulse to send him flying with a single paw)
There's also Harespring and Kestrelflight of WindClan and Owlclaw of ShadowClan. All of them are from a single litter between Whitewater and Mudclaw. She was going to raise the three of them alone as ShadowClan cats, but when the sire was smote, Whitewater felt they were cursed.
She was able to give the oldest two to their bio-uncle, Torear, but the weather was so bad that day and the runt was so sickly and small that it surely would have killed him. I don't think Owlclaw ever finds out why his mother always treated him with suspicion, but it did mess him up horribly.
Over in BB!DOTC, Thunder Storm is getting more half-siblings earlier. Clear Sky and Falling Feather had two daughters-- Pale Sky and Tiger Sky.
I want to explore the way that the various stages of Clear Sky's life acted on his kids. How any little curiosity Thunder Storm had about the life he might have had if he wasn't abandoned is crushed by seeing kittens who weren't. How Clear's favoritism of his oldest child set the trio against each other from the start. How this idea of "love" is toxic yet intoxicating.
It feels good to be the golden child. The power it gives you over his sycophants is satisfying. To know you, and you alone, have what someone else craves. Problem is, that's conditional, and it's cruel.
What Thunder Storm learns from his time with his biodad is that Clear Sky is not his father at all. He's taught him exactly what he DOESN'T want to be. There may be similarities-- in temperament, in physical prowess (though BB!Thunder is three-legged, he's still ripped), in taste and senses. But Thunder Storm's father is Shaded Flower.
(BB!Gray Wing died in the first book, rescuing Shaded Flower from being trampled by a horse. Xey're a patron of wisdom, Shaded Moss is taking the role of fatherhood to Thunder)
His sister is Rainswept Flower. His mom is Bright Storm. If there was a bond he could have had with Tiger Sky and Pale Sky, it dies simply and cruelly on the knife they used to cut each other out.
Pale might have wanted to mend it, she was the gentler one. But she dies in the First Battle along with her mother. Tiger Sky is too stubborn to accept any help, should Thunderstar offer it, and Thunderstar isn't in the business of begging for others to like him.
Naturally I'm lowkey obsessed with them lmao. I need to make a BB!DOTC overviewww
#I have a perspective on half siblings colored by a dynamic in my family#The generation above me has two siblings who had an awful biodad and an amazing stepdad (who did officially adopt them)#And there was nothing ''natural'' or good about how one of them was obsessed with their biodad.#It was influenced by his surroundings and did nothing but drag an incredibly toxic man back into his sister's life#Over and over#But anyway the son used to tell me ''theres no half in siblings''#The daughter adored her halfbrother through the mother who raised them-- but was adamant that her biodad's newer kids were nothing to her#I guess I agree with the son. But not in the way he believes it#There's no half in siblings because you either Are. Or you are Not.#You have a shared experience with having that person as a parent or you don't. And that's what's unchanging.#It's not the blood; it's the sweat and tears. But anyhoo#Personal details of my life aside#Tiger Sky and Pale Sky are Clear's Dead Angel Fetus Children in-canon. I think that was Weird.#So instead I made them. Not. Dead angel fetus children....#They're characters now lmaoo#Better bones au#I think Tiger Sky (i call her Tigs in my head a lot) is one of my favorite kit saves ever though#She's not going to be from the last litter either. I haven't picked who the mom is yet but he does have even more#At least one of those is going to make a grab at power but um. Sparrow Heart will not react Well.#BASICALLY lads I'm cooking. My revamps of the DOTC characters basically write themselves because I am very fond of them.#Clear's youngest: ''OH I JUST CANT WAIT TO BE KI-"#Sparrowstar: ''-lled.''
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hey you know that post about the lamb/guard dog/wolf being a great ot3 dynamic
what if the worst came to pass for the lamb. and the guard dog & the wolf locked jaws and neither will let go
or. what if jessamine came back to haunt daud, and forced him to take responsibility for the events of dishonored 1?
just started posting a new complex psychosexual corvodaud slowburn enemies to lovers fic on ao3
#dishonored#daud#corvo attano#jessamine kaldwin#corvodaud#knifecrow#to be clear: not an ot3 thing. shes dead. so its corvodaud and past corvojess but its...similar to the concept#domestic daud. corvo and em. billie and daud. prison escapes. whalers in the hound pits. homoerotic knife nonsense.#also. fatherhood grief greed jealousy vengeance hamlet jokes.#hope there's no upper limit on how many times a single author can rewrite dishonored 1#here i am. making it worse. again#feels weird calling it enemies to lovers when its more complicated than that. but hey#at least slowburn is correct. obsessive slowburn is even more correct#who am i to question fic jargon i just write stories
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Inès McIntosh, Mathieu Ganio, Heloïse Bourdon
Mayerling
photo Helena Maria Buckley
#ballet#ballerina#danseur#etoile#paris opera ballet#mayerling#heloise bourdon#ines mcintosh#mathieu ganio#EVERYTHING about this#you do know how obsessed i am with him#trying to kiss giselle’s hand#when she’s laying dead in her mother’s arms#and how he couldn’t#because the mother is glaring at him#daring him to try#so THIS is some serious next level shit!#and honestly if you could see him#whenever Sissi is on stage#oh boy…#he just desperately needs his mum#and it’s so incredibly painful for both sides#*screams*
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my sense of urgency for this election was all used up watching a genocide play out live on instagram while my mom continued to talk about which politician might make the housing market better and i tried not to genuinely lose my mind over the dissonance. in all honesty short of bombs dropping on americans' houses my adrenal glands are beyond checked out. i'll show up to the polls and do my part and try to plug into the bare bones direct action i can find in the middle of nowhere deep red county state but god. there are so many posts circulating trying to fear monger me into voting for one genocidal president of this genocidal nation over another and i may as well live on a different planet. i can fathom the urgency but i could not make myself feel it short of being held at gunpoint. which may even be on the ballot but that's how americans have been voting for decades now and each of them regardless of party has worried about the idea of being held at gunpoint while a right of theirs is taken away while there are people who are already being held at gunpoint and their rights have already been taken away by the very people being beamed into my eyeballs as the escape from this hypothetical violence that's already non-hypothetically happened to millions who aren't US liberals because of the america they're trying to save from trump the same america regardless of democrats or republicans or whigs or federalists and does anyone else feel like they're going crazy
#j.txt#2024 elections#cannot imagine how american palestinians are feeling#it's genuinely... like i felt honest to god insane watching the boots on the ground journalists over there every day for like 4 months#and then going to work 5 days a week like any of this fucking matters#like nothing about this election can compare in my psyche to that like i'm not even trying to compare them but my brain like#changed shapes this year. and its shape now does not include a sense of urgency about fucking dollhouse barbie american politics after#experiencing all that. last year early this year#i still think about gaza every day but i'm privileged enough to have burned out obsessively getting updated every day#the ocean we swim in said this is normal now. israel committing genocide w our dollars is normal now#it's the same shit with the pandemic and i don't buy into it but the dissonance of the entire world around me spinning on that axis#while mine spins on a completely different one where thousands of people we could have saved are dead now#like sorry that is genuinely insane. i feel like my mind will actually break if i think about it for too long#it's a worldwide gaslight and it's Unfathomable that these political issues in my world#where thousands are dead. is not on my mom's political radar whatsoever like she's thinking about jesus and the housing market#like those thousands upon thousands of lives were never even REAL#i feel like i'm going crazy man it's so fucking ridiculous how am i supposed to take politics seriously with that split#like i know how and i still do but. can anyone here me it's just#it's genuinely a gaslight to think about it too long like i will feel like my reality is splintering
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If Kipperlilly DOES end up betraying Porter/Jace as part of a secret other scheme she has (whether good or evil) and it has to do with saving Lucy, I just know she’s going to be a bitch about it and pull a ‘sorry, I only save High Five Heroes’ before leaving her other friends to die or some shit. And then she will take her final form: Magic Betty from Adventure Time, betraying her allies and saving her frost gf at the expense of the world. It would also parallel what Ankarna is going through (‘your girlfriend’s out of town, it sucks’, becoming a little imperialist rage machine under the influence of Porter/Sunstone but not being able to fully turn on Lucy despite going against her values and turning into a violent weirdo). This is my wish. My dream. I am manifesting it. Magic Betty Kipperlilly I believe in you.
#I am currently painting clown makeup on my face rn but this is what I’ve been rooting for from the beginning so let me dream#Come on though she HAS to have some other shit going on though right?#She was DEFINITLY in that temple when the Bad Kids said Ankarna’s name#Brennan literally rolled#and we know she was in Porter’s office#so WHY hadn’t she told him Ankarna’s real name yet? We know he genuinely believed Fig found it#Also the BKs couldn’t see who was in the window during the Wanda Childa scene#Which one of the RGs has invisibility?#HMMMM#Wanda saying ‘Kipperlilly? Why are you doing this? Is it because you’re jealous?’ before getting carried off by a fake Porter would let KP#know ‘okay they FULLY saw what happened after I killed Buddy and are onto us’ which would cause her to follow them to the temple#Also…if NONE of the Rat Grinders knew Ankarna’s name then what did Lucy write on her form to change her divinity???#We KNOW it was Ankarna’s name and not the ‘symbol representing her’ because no one could see it BECAUSE the god was dead and no one alive#knew her name#Which means Lucy HAD TO HAVE KNOWN and was keeping it from the others right?#And when she died and didn’t come back they were fucked because they couldn’t even check the form anymore#But#Brennan also said that if Porter WASNT using Devil’s Honey and genuinely believed in Rage And Conquest goddess Ankarna instead of just her#domain then he and his ritual would (maybe) bring her back instead of killing her permenantly so he can take her domain#And idk#A powerful goddess of rage and conquest who despite everything can’t be turned against her sister and ex#who’s resurrection would mean the rune could be broken and Lucy can come back to life#One who has (or had) a personal vendetta against at least one of the bad kids#and a personal vendetta against the people who led to Lucy’s death#that sounds pretty appealing to someone as spiteful and obsessive as Kipperlilly doesn’t it#especially after her best (maybe only real) friend died and didn’t come back#especially if she stayed dead specifically to stop Porter#Again I’m putting my clown makeup on but I don’t want her to be secretly good or anything just unhinged and gay and a parallel to Ankarna#Please world let me have this I’m on my knees#dimension 20
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sorry sorry sorry sorry I cannot go a day without thinking about how frequently I see "I support womens wrongs! give us more female villians! give us more complex female characters!" in the fandom when these same people hate on Mapleshade for literally just existing . . . ARE YOU SURE you want more female characters who are genuinely bad people . . . "Mapleshade is so horrible! she was a liar!" yeah shes a villain. shes a villain. why are you dissing her for being a villain and having a villain backstory. I see soo many people like fr hate her just because she isnt a good person when she isnt supposed to be a good person because she is a VILLAIN like I am going to shed a full head of hair
#warrior cats#wc#mapleshade#AM I THE ONLY ONE?#I literally never see people beef w mapleshade#the same way they beef w the male villains#male villains can literally stomp on babies and ppl will be like#“oh hes so interesting I like how hes written”#mapleshade is given the most basic tame villain orgin ever#and people legit HATE HER GUTS#she gets the dreaded “oh shes a babytrapper...” “annoying obsessive woman...” treatment#soul... dead#if you just dislike how shes written ... thats ok just not the point of this post
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Annie & Peter in BELLEVUE 1. "Pilot"
#bellevue cbc#anna paquin#shawn doyle#(i rewatched big love and now i'm here)#when i say that i am obsessed i am OBSESSED with this 7 year old one and done canadian crime show#and more specifically THEM#just a disaster of a traumatized woman who terrorizes the ones she loves to make sure they love her#and her dead dad's mentee who's devoted his life to her but is also her boss#her skittering after him! her patiently glaring at him till he breaks and gives her his full attention!#my gif5
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I hate getting into something that has a canon(ish) sapphic couple, but I only end up caring about one of the two women 😭😭😭
#warrior nun? only cared about beatrice couldn't really get behind ava much#the locked tomb? INSANE for gideon. harrow is like cool I guess (I feel like I should like her more than I do idk)#and now dungeon meshi. I knoowwwww I'm going to love falin. 10 episodes in and I already find her relatable and awesome and so cool and sexy#AND SHE BECOMES A DRAGON LIKE FUCK MAN (she's still dead atm but soon soooooon)#marcille on the other hand?? I mean she's fine... but I'm not really drawn to her (I like namari a lot more tbh)#and the thing is I know part of it is the feminization of all three of them#I am not attracted to femininity pretty much ever (outside of a super sexed up version in which case gugh)#and ava and marcielle both have a very bubbly personality type that has never really drawn me in ever#they can have cool stories and I can enjoy them in that. but I have no desire to seek them out outside of that#and harrow... honestly I think it might be the way fandom sees her that makes me not care much about her?#also my feelings about the series as a whole by the end of nona probably don't help#BUT I definitely think a big part for all three is the femininity. none of their counterparts that I DO love are overly fem#(and HONESTLY I don't think harrow should be either and the fact hardly no one actually makes her butch the way I see her pisses me off)#((she CANONICALLY hated her long hair!!!!!!!!! stop giving her anything more than a buzz cut I'm going to attack you!!!!!!))#also. marcielle has green eyes and I'm sorry but I just can't 😭#I need every single character ever in existence to only ever have brown/black or gold/yellow eyes#stop with the blue and the green 😭 please#ANYWAY POINT BEING: I hate that this happens to me because I end up not getting obsessed with the ship#and mostly only getting into the single character but then I don't want to read fic about just one person#so I try out the ship stuff and shocker no one writes the other character in a way I like so I don't read it#and then I feel bad cause all my ships and main characters I'm obsessed over are men#and then I complain all the fandom favs and mcs in stories are men#but like I'm contributing to the problem!!!! but like I'm not attracted to hannibal but I like his personality#I'm not attracted to optimus but I love how fucked up his whole deal with megatron is#I DO love both luffy and zoro even though I'm not really attracted to either of them#the lotr/hobbit ships.... eh I love the world and I love dwarves and I will do anything for them so the characters don't matter much lol#AND THATS THE ISSUE 😭 the worlds of warrior nun and tlt and most of what i've seen of dungeon meshi don't really entrance me much#so I don't get into the ships for that. and I'm not attracted to both people in the ship. and I can't relate/project on both in the ship#and sometimes I find one character type less likable/annoying so that makes me not want to engage
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Do you ever think about what Wyatt and Billie’s relationship would look like? I mean, do you ever think that maybe he sees Billie as an omen? A prophesied witch with not only extraordinary power, but projection specifically, that evil has hunted and desired for years, to the point of creating intricate plots to turn them from a young age? (While my Wyatt doesn’t realize yet, the fact that Billie and Wyatt both fell into evil’s clutch in the past? That their redemption came at their sibling’s life? That their deaths can be traced directly to them?)
Imagine Billie post-series, who has lost. honestly, everything in under a year. She went from a confident, headstrong newly-discovered witch determined to save the day to a powerful witch who lost her entire family and was manipulated and used by evil to attack good as a whole. After all of that, I don’t really think that you walk out of that without it becoming a deeply impactful and integral part of your experience.
So a Billie who is more subdued and removed from magical affairs. A Billie who knows the price and risks with magic, especially her own. A Billie who learns how to master her magic, because she’s already seen the consequences of her failures, but there is no real need for it anymore with the lack of demonic attacks. And she is asked, by the sisters who she betrayed and had to earn their trust again, to help teach a witch just like her to control his powers.
Beyond her own experiences, do you think Billie ever told the sisters about Dumain showing her what Wyatt was supposed to “become”? Or did she just chalk it up to his lies and manipulation? And even if she did tell them, do you think that the sisters would be able to tell her? When they themselves never actually knew how bad it was in the unchanged future? When they’re still unsure if they can trust her again and handing her that information includes telling them how, despite all of their power, they could still do nothing as a son/nephew died in front of them?
So she tries to impart how important it is that Wyatt uses his powers for good, not to harm. She trains him to control his power, tries to teach him to respect it as something incredibly dangerous. She conveys over and over again that projection is powerful, but dangerous and if you’re not careful, it can create a lot of harm. She isn’t his only teacher, but she, with her own history and the same power and the knowledge that he will outclass them all and that vision that is bad enough without considering what else he is able to do, is the one who is able to understand best. Piper and Phoebe and Paige are extremely powerful, obviously, but their power is rooted in their bond and that itself helps keep them in check because there is a balance. Billie, her sister (the key) dead and her as the real Ultimate Power, is the closest to knowing what that’s like.
Except Wyatt is Wyatt, his mother and father’s son in everyway but especially his heart. He’s the child who tried to prevent conflict before he was even born. He’s the child who took everyone’s burdens on himself as his to solve before he could even speak. He needed to protect his loved ones, no matter how powerful they individually were. When he failed, he blamed himself. When people struggled, and he couldn’t help them, he blamed himself. Not only does he blame himself for not being able to save or help people, he pins his entire worth as a person on his ability to help. This is the child who thought that he deserved to die because of his father’s grief and inner turmoil, something he wasn’t even to blame for. And he sees so much of himself in Billie, sees her story as a warning if he is to slip to the wrong side, if he is to be blinded to evil and used as a weapon. He takes every message that Billie tries to teach and internalizes it just a little bit too much, takes it just a bit too personally.
And imagine what happens. Billie, who can relate to Wyatt’s potential future just a bit too much, trying to teach him caution and instead teaches him fear. Wyatt, who sees a bit too many similarities in Billie’s past, transforms her lessons of control and innocents into repression and his value. Because they see those similarities, but they don’t quite see the differences and those differences change everything.
#charmed#abi speaks#wyatt halliwell#billie jenkins#charmed meta#*pterodactyl screech*#this wasnt supposed to be sad!! this wasnt supposed to be depressing!!#but now im crying at 1 am about billie and wyatt#bc they're so similar but their differences change absolutely everything but they're both drawn to those similarities#and so instead they both create this fear about wyatt's power and what he can do which just fuels that fear and aghhhh#this!! was not!! the plan!!#i wanted to sneak in a joke about them both being blonde but where the fuck am i supposed to include that#how am i supposed to make a blonde joke in this??#but also this v briefly touches on the fact that i feel billie is an incredibly interesting character after the conclusion of the show#tbh she's. insufferable on the actual show but i wanna try to have her as an actually decent character#and the tragic backstory can help with that bc. your parents are dead. your sister is dead.#you (probably) failed out of school and lost all of your friends due to your obsessive magic focus that you couldnt tell them#you betrayed the only people who were still there for you#you are twenty years old and your life is irrevocably destroyed#and you are the only one left to pick up the pieces to try to rebuild something that made any of it worth it#there is no way that doesnt become an integral part of who you are for at least a while#like. look at that amount of trauma in the span of under a year and let's see how billie pieces together something#bc there are no more demons. there are no more fights. there is only your grief and your betrayal and your mistakes that you have left#with all of that no wonder she tries to earn the sisters forgiveness. with all of that no wonder the sisters forgive her#bc what else could happen when its piper who lost a sister and phoebe who became evil for love and paige who lost her parents#bc who else can even attempt to understand besides the sisters that she betrayed? and bc they DO understand they forgive her#honestly i think that could be a pretty powerful story lmao#hey abi are you okay lmao idk im losing my mind over billie jenkins at 1 am what do you think
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I feel like at least several times a month, I have a random insane revitalization of my love for The Smiths. Not that I ever stop loving them, but I'll listen to some song and then suddenly fall into this pit of just deep, intense love for their music again where I can't stop listening to their music on repeat and watching live performances and looking at pics like AAAAAHHHHHH WHY IS THEIR MUSIC SO GOOOD?????? WHY IS IT PERFECT?????? WHY WERE THEY SO GENDER???????
(songs I am feeling intense brainrot over rn in case you're curious: "I Want The One I Can't Have(live)", "Stretch Out and Wait(live)", "You Just Haven't Earned It Yet Baby", "Some Girls Are Bigger Than Others(demo)", "What She Said", "The Boy With The Thorn in His Side(live)"(p.s. I Want The One I Can't Have is Martian-coded to me, pls listen)(also it reminds me of that movie I watched yesterday)
#i want the one i cant have is playing on repeat in my brain rn and i watched a live performance and i was tearing up. why am i like this#the live versions of their songs are just incredibly good like at an insane level to me#i know the guitar is very complicated bcs my brother is equally obsessed w the smiths and rants to me abt how hard their music is to play#so the fact that their live performances are equal if not better than their studio versions is crazy#and i love the way he sings in live versions AAAAHHHH like just so over the top and dramatic#i absolutely love singing along to music and their songs are perfect bcs i can be as dramatic and loud as i want#and that hes singing perfectly and dramatizing it so much also while dancing along to it on stage??????#their music has an energy to it in every single aspect that no other band will ever be able to reach for me#i spent so much of today just dancing along to their music and singing over the top. i just felt so joyful 🥹🥹🥹🥹#GAAAHHHH sorry i just am really in it rn hahaha#its just crazy to me ig that ive listened to these songs so many times and they still fill me with such emotion#my mom sings and dance along w me tho shes like 'wow youre so energetic today did you hit your head or smth' 😭😭😭#also was losing my mind looking at their pictures today and gahhhhhhhhb such gender envy their gender is unmatched to me#but its so funny every time i get gender envy over smiths era morrissey +#because theres some pics of my dad from that same period of time when he was younger where he literally looks exactly like morrissey#SIR WHY DID I NOT INHERIT YOUR LEVEL OF GENDER???????(my dad was a icon sjdkkd we look alike tbh)#anyways: i feel very joyful and energetic about their music. they just make me so happy and i want to dance around again 🥹#i think this recent lapse into the pit was bcs i listened to the demos/live versions on The Queen is Dead deluxe edition#and im like ....how the fuck are they this fucking good??????#hehehe tho my passion has affected others 🤭#my brother is learning some songs on guitar atm and waxes poetic abt their instrumentals#my dad always listens to their entire discography when he needs background music. and my mom sings and dances w me#sorry this is unhinged i just feel a lot of serotonin bcs their music and i need to infect other people LMAO#maybe i need to make another web weave#catie.rambling.txt
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Sometimes I don't notice when we pass your old house anymore. Sometimes I don't remember to look for the sign at your exit. I feel like I'm finally moving on but idk if that's bad or good cause I still miss you a lot but I feel like I miss you less. That's better for my mental health I guess but I feel terrible about it, especially when a couple months ago missing you was like half my day.
#shes not dead#btw#just miss her a lot#or i did#i literally wrote her a detailed account of everything thats happened to me and how much i miss her like two montsh ago#(it never got sent btw it was a mess)#(i cried twice writing it)#(i am no longer obsessed)#(actually i wrote two and i think i posted both of them on here. if you scroll far enough you can find them)#(i also made her a playlist with a bunch of songs that reminded me of her and songs she used to like)#(its been privated though good luck finding it)#(i might actually unprivate it cause she'll never see it)#we didnt date we were just friends but she was like my BEST friend yk
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friend got done with the fight and I was talking about the romance scene...But like. Soft faces?? love them. I just love the expressions in this game in general.
#Img: Talilah Bluethorn#Character: Talilah Bluethorn#I just really like how soft their expressions can be#but also how raw they can be too??#I'm just obsessed with the faces in this game ok#I got this game bc it was pretty#so that's why we're here#also I am rambling in tags to try to push tags back#in order to keep people from interacting with this due to my image tags#so like. SOFT FACES AMIRITE#gdi I need like. ten more tags#you guys know I wrote a fic where she helps him get cleaned up afterwards#bc I wanted her to wash his hair#but there's also sass of course#this couple doesn't exist without sass#omg five more tags I feel like I'm filling dead space#I really need to write some more fics. that'll be my thing tomorrow along with replies#I just enjoy them picking on each other that's how it rolls#why did they give him such a unique name#I am suffering here#Others: Astarion
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