#she was like no i dont WANT THAT and i was like ??!????? why didnt you sayyyyy thattttttttt ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh myyyyy goddd

[andromeda-collective]

i have multiple and im going to mention all of them but im starting with THIS FUCKER HERE (blade from honkai star rail) AND I HAVE A VERY STUPID REASON FOR IT

there was an minigame thing with a character named march 7th (dont ask) and there were little events you could encounter throughout it and one of them was that you had to choose between a red and blue pill (or the third option of giving a nonanswer) and since my choice didnt matter at all i went with the red pill because i know that the matrix is a transfem allegory and i also hc march as transfem but then another character made a little comment that blade would ALSO pick the red pill which completely makes sense for his character but since i was still on the transfem allegory mindset i had the thought of "wait does this make blade transfem??" so shes transfem to me now 👍

estrogen would NOT save her. not even REMOTELY. he's a suicidal immortal who physically cannot die because of a ritual his old friend-with-romantic-implications tried who he now wants dead more than anything else. hes basically possessed by evil plants that revive him every time he dies and he goes fucking feral. hes a mass murderer with a bounty of over 8 billion. nothing can save him. but transitioning might make her miserable life slightly more manageable? plus i mean.. throwing your old name away and being a new person? obviously a metaphor for being trans /j

boothill! this is slightly for shipping reasons (turning a het ship wlw for funzies) but mostly projecting my gender-nonconforming transness onto the only southern disabled character i know of. are we different kinds of southern? yes. are we different kinds of disabled? also yes. do i care? absolutely not. (also because butch southern women make the world go round)

also sampo because the idea that this fuck is a cisgender ANYTHING is laughable. this is a nonbinary transfem boymoding for shits and giggles who randomly switches to the girl voice when talking to someone JUST to fuck with them because nobody else would believe them and the person would think theyre losing it. typical masked fool stuff. gaslight gatekeep girlboss.

and then from genshin impact: zhongli. who has CANONICALLY used shapeshifting to become a woman. and has likely done so on more than one occasion. this guy is CANONICALLY GENDERFLUID WHETHER PEOPLE LIKE IT OR NOT. and you can obviously be genderfluid and transfem at the same time so why the hell not :D

most other characters i hc as transfem i dont have much of a reason for, but im gonna list them anyways cause hell yeah

argenti (hsr) - she can have a little estrogen as a treat

dr. ratio (hsr) - no reason i just think it could work

sunday (hsr) - something something religious-trauma-and-giving-into-what-you-once-believed-to-be-sinful

diluc (genshin) - fanfiction on ao3 changed my brain chemistry

kazuha (genshin) - also no reason i just think it fits

sebastian solace (a game on roblox called pressure) - im gonna be honest with you op, i just like putting this fucker in situations. and i would love to see the struggle of medically transitioning when you've been forcibly had your body and dna altered to the point of no longer being human. even ignoring for a few seconds the thought that maybe hrt wouldnt have the same effect (or any effect at all) due to the experiments, how could you will yourself to alter yourself medically in any way after the horrific trauma you've experienced? its between fucking with your already fucked up body or having the dysphoria kill you from the inside out. i am rotating her in my mind even harder now.

p.ai.nter (from same game) on the other hand? a lot simpler. make the ai with guns a girl. also just a funny idea: you know that "put eyelashes on it to make it obvious that its a girl" thing? yeah. painter doing that.

^ TELL ME SHE WOULDNT.

i would apologize for the essay but you did say i was legally required to share so this is your fault /lh

anyways i hope you enjoyed the women

If you see this post you’re legally required to tell me at least one trans woman headcanons you have for a canonically male character, I never get to see transfem headcanons like that, give me them, and for equality of my own please know estrogen could have saved Insector Haga and Dinosaur Ryuzaki I will not elaborate, also Yuya.

[shad0wvisi0n]

Caffeinated Monster

Summary: SV3 drinks coffee for the first time in order to stay up late for SV4 gaming night, but things take a twist when the power in the studio goes out and a monster hunts in the dark.

Tags: Flashing Art, Body Horror, fluff, angst with happy ending, hurt and comfort

AU Created by @b-r-i-n-g-x and @shygirl4991

ALL ART IS DONE BY BRINGX DO NOT REPOTS

Shout out to our other Assistants @merp0515 @anartisticalniche Last Chapter Main Fic

Liko tosses and turns, flashes of SV4 injury played in her head every time she closed her eyes. She sits up on the bed letting out a sigh as she runs her fingers through her hair, she turns to see Flor floating asleep next to her. With a small chuckle, she gets up and walks to the kitchen. She groans as she looks around noticing that she used up the last of the coffee last night, the lack of sleep is killing her motivation to continue her experiments. She leans against the counter confused, she never felt this way towards something she created so why was she so haunted. She looks at the front door then to her bedroom door before she makes up her mind, she changes into her usual outfit and checks the time. “It’s not too late, maybe i could pay a small visit and make sure that kid is taking care of his eye,” she knew with SV3 around she wouldn't have to worry about how 4 was doing yet something pulled her to them.

As she gets in her car she rehearses her greeting “Hey ran out of coffee and who needs to buy some when i got you guys!” she lets out a smile before dropping it. Leaning back on the car seat she couldn't understand why these events were bothering her so much, they were just subjects she invented. Just like how she ‘fixed’ Mr Puzzle, the boys were made to please that first project and that's all.  She grabs the steering wheel and stares silently at the road ahead of her, letting out a sigh as she starts the car heading to the studio. SV3 hums letting his hair free of their constraints, he walks over to the kitchen where he hears an upset SV4 in his room. 3 giggles hearing his partner as he grabs a plate from the cabinet, looking at the assortment of snacks the man grabs a couple of SV4 favorites and places them nicely on the plate.  With a hop in his step, he walks to SV4 room with the plate “Hey 4! Got you some snacks and remember not to get too into your games, last time you forgot your pain medication your powers went pretty crazy.” SV4 takes the plate with a small smile before letting out a groan “Look not my fault the boss fight was such a challenge, you know i dont back down!” SV3 shakes his as he opens the door, he turns, staring at the bandaged eye feeling a pang of guilt hit him before he leaves. 

As he closes the door behind him the doorbell rings, confused as to who would be coming over so late he walks over to the front door. He opens the door then shuts it in a panic, the person on the other side of the door was Liko. 3 looked at his face and frowned, it was close to his normal time of sleeping meaning any trace of his iconic make up was gone. He bites his lips as he awkwardly opens the door hoping Liko doesn't ask about his face, after all someone as fashionable as SV3 isn't a fan of walking around certain people with a naked face. Liko gives him an annoying look “Can feel how welcomed I am, can I come in?” SV3 moves aside to let Liko in “I’m so sorry Ms. Liko, you caught me by surprise. You don't normally come at this hour.” He follows the scientist to the kitchen where he watches her search their cabinets. Liko sighs as she peeks at SV4 room “He taking care of that eye?” Hearing the question 3 turns looking at the yellow door, he smiles softly as he nods “Yeah, he has been good at that. Only thing he isn't good at is walking around without hitting himself against everything.” 3 frowns staring at the door, if he didnt get so angry and left the studio the way he did then SV4 wouldn't have gotten hurt. SV3 felt the sting of his tears wanting to escape, Liko turned and noticed 3’s face. She leans over the counter and pats his head. “We didn't know what that place had…only one who did was Mr puzzle, you could always do what SV4 does.”  Liko lets out a chuckle, SV3 smiles at the woman's chuckle as he turns to her “SV4 really is angry at him…I just worry about him, I don't care so much about Mr puzzle. 4 just seems different now, I can't help blaming myself for this…” 

Liko lets out a sigh as she pulls back, she doesn't need to comfort him there is no need he is just an experiment. As she continued her search in the cabinet she couldn't help herself “Look, it's only part of being alive that these things happen. Science knows that I have done a lot of stupid things out of emotions…but mistakes are what helps you grow.” She grabs a bag of coffee beans and turns to show she got her prize, SV3 eyes go wide seeing the bag of coffee. He felt his stomach flip at the site, as she put the bag on the counter “Now coffee?” SV3 felt himself break into a sweat seeing the bag, he then turned looking at the yellow door. Then turning back to Liko shaking his head in a panic, she tilts her head at his reaction “You’re not a fan of coffee?” SV3 lets out a nervous chuckle as he nods “I dont have the best history of it, I’m sorry Ms. Liko but if you're going to make a cup I should excuse myself.” She watches as he gets up and runs to his room slamming it shut, she stares at the door confused before slowly turning to the yellow door. If she wanted answers it wouldn't hurt to ask, she grabs the bag of coffee and walks to 4’s door knocking on it. 

Why did she even want answers when she thinks about it, she shouldn't get herself involved in their life. They’re experiments, something to please the first project and test her knowledge. Yet here she is watching the yellow door open as she looks down at the injured man, SV4 looks annoyed before his expression changes to one of surprise “Liko?” She shows off the bag of coffee catching his attention, he looks around before stepping out of his room “Not like you to be a friendly neighbor, what do you need? More blood for a test?”  Liko’s eyes go wide as she watches 4 slowly walking trying not to trip over furniture, he sits down in the kitchen staring at her “Or are we going to throw a pity party over me being a pirate, cause if that's what we are doing save it. I get enough puppy eyes from SV3 when I'm doing things outside of my room.”  Liko shakes her head as she walks to the kitchen to start brewing the coffee, she grabs a green cup before facing SV4 “Nothing special today, well i guess i do have one question. I wasnt a fan of going shopping in the middle of the night so I thought I would come here for coffee, SV3 seemed panicked at the bag. Any idea why?” 

SV4 sighs as he grabs a cookie from the jar in front of him, he looks at it with some excitement before taking a bite “You know how you said sugar is like a battery charge for me? Well I think I learned a few weeks ago what SV3 battery charge is…and let me tell you I lost someone important that day..” He frowns, staring at a small gravestone near his room, Liko follows his gaze and stares surprised at the spot  “How did i not notice that before?” Ignoring her 4 takes another bite from his cookie “Let me tell you a story that changed us in this studio.”

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Few weeks ago SV4 smirks as he waves a ps1 controller “Alright, the only real way to welcome you newbie is the great crash challenge!” SV3 bounces in excitement as he watches 4 walk over to his set up, he takes out crash team racing from its case showing it before popping it in the system. SV3 takes his seat next to 4 as he grabs his controller, SV4 smirks as the character selection screen shows up “Now let's have a fair race, don't get too pouty when you lose to me!” SV3 smiles as he picks Coco as his character “I won't! This is just us hanging out right?” SV4 slowly nods, hiding that he was in fact picking this game to show off, as the race start 4 made sure to use every shortcut he knew to his advantage. SV3 eyes go wide in awe seeing how fast his new partner was “Wow you really know your way around the game huh!” SV4 leans back holding back his smile  “Eh i know i trick or two,” it was strange to think not too long ago he felt so alone. He would play these games, study them and attempt the best time in order to do videos on them.  He never noticed how he felt lonely while he wouldn't confess to it outloud, he truly needed someone he could just play games with. SV4 didn't care much for SV3, the man would talk so much about how to match yellow with green and other assortment of colors. Stuff 4 didn't care for after all why would he change out of his overalls? After a couple of rounds SV3 felt himself nodding off, he looked around the room and noticed that there wasn't a clock “Hey…SV4 what time is it?” As he selected his character 4 reached over to the bedside table, picking up his phone he causally flashes the time to SV3.  Seeing the time 3 gasp “IT’S 2AM?!” it was no wonder the man felt his eyes getting heavy, he got up from the bed making SV4 frowns “Yeah so? It’s still early, plenty of more matches can happen.”  SV3 notices the excitement that was on SV4 vanishes and now replaced with an annoyed frown, feeling guilty he looks at the kitchen. Slowly an idea came to him, SV4 energy boost is sweets perhaps his could be caffeine and it will help him keep his partner company. 

SV3 attempts to mask his exhaustion as he points to the kitchen “Oh yeah totally…so we should make coffee,Keep spirits up!” SV4 face lights up before making a face of disgust “Coffee? Meh rather have soda but hey we all have our own preferred drinks, i'm sure that box head keeps some coffee in the cabinet.” With a nod the pair head to the kitchen, SV4 takes a seat as he watches 3 look around for a cup. SV3 was feeling strangely nervous as he grabs a yellow cup, he then goes to the top cabinet grabbing a bag of mocha coffee.  As he stares at the bag his mind races, he had no idea if he would even enjoy the beverage perhaps the right path was just to go to bed. He turns to see SV4 eating pocky as he reads a game guide for a final fantasy game he is playing, remembering the face the man had was enough to give  him the answer he needed. SV3 puts everything together then watches the coffee maker brew, he had to do this to bring that smile back on SV4's face. They are partners there was no way he could let 4 down, he grabs the cup of coffee and stares at it nervously. SV4 notices the silence then turns to 3, he stares at the man’s face for a moment before letting out a sigh “You don't have to drink it, not everyone can live the gamer life like i do.” SV3 lets out a soft giggle “I want to play more, plus nothing has ever gone wrong with someone drinking coffee!” with a bright smile he chugs the cup. 

SV4 nods as he gets up from his seat “Let's go then,”  SV3 nods following his partner to the room. He was feeling good, more alert he was confident that in a few minutes he would be wide awake, as they pick their characters SV3 giggles as the screen flickers.  SV4 looks at the tv annoyed as he struggles to find the shortcuts with the flickering “The fuck is going on with my tv?” SV3 was getting more into the game as his eyes slightly glowed, the static getting worse, SV4 swears under his breath. The moment SV3 made it past the finish line the tv stopped glitching letting SV4 able to see where he was, he pouts seeing he was in fourth place “Stupid television, maybe it's time to stop given my tv is acting up.” SV3 frowns hearing the comment “What? But I drank coffee to play more!” The room lights start to flicker as the tv screen showing the game goes static, SV4 gets up looking around his room confused “SV4…we are going to play more right?” SV4 shakes his head as he stares at his tv “Don't think so, something weird is going on with the power here.” Deciding to get answers he looks annoyed at the tv knowing he will have to talk to Mr. Puzzle, SV4 lets out a long sigh as he walks to the door “Hate that i have to do this but i need to bug box head about this issue, otherwise we won't be able to game.” SV3 eye twitches as 4 leaves the room “But…we were supposed to play games together….why are you leaving me?”  SV3 started to feel his body heat up as the lights in the bedroom exploded, leaving the static on the tv being the only source of light. 

SV4 stops walking as the living room goes dark, he groans as he starts to walk again only to feel something squishy under his foot. He looks down squinting to see something moving on the floor “The fuck is that?” He bends down trying to get a closer look, only to see the normal studio floor. SV4 stands up pinching the bridge of his nose, he was officially losing it. SV3 leaving 4’s room frowns as he calls out to the man “SV4! I dont get why he is so upset,” he lets out a sigh as he walks following SV4.  He noticed that the man in front of him seemed to be on edge, SV3 wasn't sure what was going on with his partner as he looked around. Determined to help his partner out he reaches out hoping his hand on the man’s shoulder would give comfort, he smiles brightly ready to hear what's bothering the man. SV4 hears steps behind him causing him to be alert “This is starting to feel like a cheesy horror film,” he feels a hand touch him causing SV4 to speed up on his walk. He is a TV guardian he knows better than to turn around and face whatever phantom is in the studio, SV3 blinks as he sees SV4 avoiding his touch. He growls as his eyes start to glow, the color in the room to fade, slowly being replaced by a strange black ooze leaking from the walls as SV3 anger grows. 

“WHAT THE STARS!? WHY IS MY OFFICE ON FIRE!” hearing Mr Puzzle yelling, SV4 runs to the office to see Mr Puzzle's desk on fire. He sighs, closing the door and grabbing the fire extinguisher, as he extinguishes the fire from the corner of his eye he notices something green.  SV4 drops the extinguisher as he approaches the green object “Thank you…wait what are you doing over here, aren't you busy with those video games?” 4 gasp as he grabs a green cloth “This looks like…SV3 sweater?” Mr. Puzzle walks up to 4 staring at the cloth confused before the lights start to flicker, remembering why he came over in the first place 4 gives an annoyed look at his boss. “Hey boxhead the power has been acting up, get shit together i have games to play!” he puts the cloth in his pocket still staring at Mr. Puzzle. The screen flickered showing confusion “The power? Given that Liko set everything up, there is no way things could be on the fritz.” SV4 sighs as he walks towards the door waving his hand to sign at the man to follow. Mr. Puzzle screen changes filled with concern as he sees the door leaking a black liquid “SV4…step away from the door.”  SV4 takes a step back and looks at the door, he stares at the liquid before reaching for the door again. Mr puzzle panics reaching out to the guardian, it was too late as he watches SV4 open the door. They gasp seeing SV3 form, Mr. Puzzle shakes his head at the sight “How..did this happen?” SV4 was shocked seeing tentacles wrapping themself around SV3 arms and legs, slowly another one wrapped around his face covering his blue eye. 3's green eye glowing staring at the pair as he gives them a wide smile, the black liquid leaking from his eyes. SV4 couldn't stop staring at the as the man reached for him, the eyes on the tentacles open looking at him, 4 feels something drop on his feet and notice SV3 gloves were stained black. 

Mr. Puzzle runs slamming the door on SV3, he then grabs SV4's hand, making him run to the hidden door in the office.  “SV4 I need you to move and tell me what happened to SV3, there is no way Liko made a mistake creating him…right?” The door opens showing an angered expression on SV3, seeing this 4 let out an awkward laugh “heh Oh hi SV3, are you…are you in there? Remember how you said you can handle coffee?” mr. Puzzle drags SV4 as they run through the dark halfway. As they run through the hallway Mr puzzle thinks over what 4 said “You're telling me that SV3 drank coffee then turned into that?” 

SV4 shrugs “Hell do i know, shit didn't start going weird till he drank coffee! If I go over what Liko told me about sugar, it's supposed to give me a boost like an energy source. We thought coffee would be the same, but I think coffee just put him into overdrive!” the pair stop running looking around. Things were quiet, making Mr. Puzzle nervous “The fact he can use this power without stars…SV3 must have come out unstable. As much as I hate to say this given I will lose a star, we might have to kill SV3 and create a new one.”  SV4 eyes go wide looking at him “What?” Mr. Puzzle screen showed a serious expression, 4 pinches the bridge of his nose and sighs “Listen box head, I could care less about him you won't see me risking my life for the man.But, isn't killing jumping the gun, plus we don't know what those tentacles and weird black ooze is.” 

Mr. Puzzle stares at SV4 before looking away, it was best that his star stay blind to the power in his body. Things will be less hostile knowing how SV4 can be about making content, he shivers at the thought of what the man would do with those kinds of powers. Then again as he looks at 4 he lets out a small chuckle, the man is too distracted by video games he wouldn't even bother using his power. SV4 turns, giving him a strange look “Why are you chuckling at a time like this?” with a shake of his head Mr. Puzzle stands up straight showing off the height difference between the two of them “My star, i chuckle because i'm surprised you claim not to care about SV3 yet you pick a route to save him? I do have to admit it would be a shame to go out and collect more DNA for one person.”

SV4 crosses his arm “Do you see SV3 as just some replaceable tool?”

Mr. Puzzle screen flickers with a charming smile as he pats SV4 back “Of course not! SV3 is my darling star with so much…talent to bring to the channel, don't you agree? We are all just a growing happy family!” SV4 squints at the Mr.Puzzle taking in his words, only to hear something approaching them. He swears under his breath “Shut it box head..something is coming.”

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SV3 knocks on the door letting out a sigh “I wonder why he is ignoring me, also strange to see him run to Mr. Puzzle wonder if something bad happened?” As he walks to the office he hears panic in the room, worried he slowly knocks on the door. He waits for a moment as he hears footsteps approach the door, he smiles brightly when he sees SV4 open the door. He stares at the pair and notices the fear and shock on their face, he tilts his head confused. Slowly he reaches out to SV4 “Why do you look so scared?” Before he could touch his partner the door suddenly slammed in his face.  Annoyed by the rude behavior he opens the door glaring at the pair, SV4 lets an awkward laugh, catching 3’s attention “heh Oh hi SV3, are you…are you in there? Remember how you said you can handle coffee?”

He pauses confused about the comment as Mr. Puzzle drags the man away, he looks around the room then himself. The more he thought about the comment the more his head started to hurt, his vision getting blurry. He felt sick as he walked over to sit down at the desk, the energy he felt at the start was slowly fading away. After a small break he gets up determined to figure out what's going on, remembering how SV4 was still talking to him SV3 knew the only way to get answers was to get SV4 alone.  He learns the same path as the others, following the hall he sees the familiar glow of Mr. Puzzle screen. 

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SV4 takes out his cell phone and turns on the light, seeing this Mr. Puzzle takes the phone from his hand “What are you doing? The light from your phone will give us away.” 4 glares at the taller man jumping up to grab his phone “Your head is literally a television, if your big ass glowing head hasn't given it away why would my small phone light do it?” Mr. Puzzle’s screen flickers, showing an annoyed expression realizing that the smaller man had a point, he hands over the phone as SV4 smirks at him. With his phone back in his hand he turns only to see a tentacle reaching out to Mr. Puzzle, without thinking he shoves the man away.

SV4 wiggles as the tentacle wraps around him, SV3 tilts his head, the black tears still falling. SV4 notices 3’s mouth moving “Want…you.” SV4 stops wiggling as he stares at 3’s mouth, then he feels a hand grabbing his “SV4 hold on i have you!” he turns seeing Mr. Puzzle grabbing on to him as his other hand was pointing at SV3. Mr. Puzzle knew he didn't have enough power to stop SV3 completely, as his view turned to SV4 wrapped in the tentacles he knew he had to still try. SV3 attempts to pull 4 closer as Mr. Puzzle grip tightens “Ow! Puzzle just let me go, I'm not going to end up in two pieces thank you!” Realizing he is hurting SV4, his view swaps from 4 to 3 unsure about letting go “And if that thing hurts you?” 

SV4 looks at the mutated SV3, his grin borderline psychotic and yet SV4 didn't feel he was in danger. 4 looks at Mr. Puzzle with an bored expression “Cause me and him are partners, pretty sure that link we have wont let him.” Mr. Puzzle sighs letting 4’s hand go, seeing the tentacle pull 4 into a hug, SV3 purrs in excitement as he runs off with SV4. Seeing SV3 start to run Mr. Puzzle starts to chase after “Not going to let anything ruin my plan, I won't let my best star get hurt.”

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SV3 gets excited when he gets closer to the pair, the closer he gets to the pair his head starts to pound. The pain in his head causes him to pause as the room begins to spin for him, the moment he sees SV4 in front of him 3 shakes his head and smiles “SV4! I wanted to talk to you, please I want to understand what's going on.” 3 grabs his arm hoping that the man would listen to him, SV4 lets out a sigh and starts to walk towards him. Finally the chase is over, that is until Mr. Puzzle grabs SV4. The tug made SV3 look at the man confused “SV4 hold on i have you!” the television screen showed a worried expression. He frowns as tears escape his eyes “Why…i don't understand…” To his surprise SV4 walked up to him, he gasped feeling the man hug him. With a soft giggle SV3 takes 4’s hand “Thank you for trusting me…come on let's talk.” As they walk away SV3 wipes his tears, he was so confused as to why the pair were acting so strange. Suddenly the room around SV3 twisted, worried he turned to check on SV4 only to gasp seeing SV4 eyes glowing red. His partner readies his fist and attempts to attack SV3, quickly he kicks 4’s legs making him lose balance. Once he hits the Floor SV3 gets up looking around for something to hold down SV4 “Is this why you two are acting weird? Don't worry I will figure this out, I will get Ms. Liko and everything will be okay!” 

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SV4 hums as he is carried away in the tentacle wishing he had his psp to play with, suddenly he gets tossed across the room. His back hitting the table in the kitchen “Ow…the hell just happened?”  SV3 lets out a chuckle as he slowly approaches him “Naughty…” 4 sits up ignoring the pain in his back. SV4 knew he had to keep alert in case the coffee made 3 do something else, seeing the slow moments made 4 smirk. The coffee is wearing off the exhaustion SV3 felt earlier in the day is starting to show, he was placing a big gamble on his theory. He watches SV3 move away for a moment, he turns his head to see 3 going into this room “What on earth is he thinking?” A few moments later SV4 sighs as SV3 ties him up “You know while I don't mind being tied up, WHY MUST YOU USE MY FAVORITE PLAYSTATION 2 CONTROLLER!” 

He felt panic everytime he moved, the thought that if he did the wrong move he could damage his controller had him almost holding his breath. SV3 sits in front of him staring at him, he is able to get a better look at the form that has taken over 3. SV4 notices how the man in front of him was relaxing, a good sign it let SV4 know that his controller was safe. He needed to figure out how to save his baby before 3 snaps and breaks it, he looks at the cord feeling his heart break at the knots they were in. SV3 reaches out and starts to pet him, SV4 relaxes from the contact “Don't take this as me liking the attention, i swear if you remember things after i will deny everything in this moment.” As he relaxes from the other man's touch, SV4 thinks over the situation as he looks at the knots in front of him. 

He slowly wiggles which gets SV3 to stop petting him, 4 looks up seeing if he alerted the man only to see the man falling asleep. “There you go, just let sleep take over and things will go back to normal.” Before SV3 could fall asleep Mr. Puzzle’s kick the door open holding his finger up, he glares at SV3 who wakes up growling at him as he stands “LEAVE!” SV4 could just about cry at the timing, “Don't you worry now SV4, I wouldn't let down my star after all we have a video to make tomorrow.” SV4 blinks at him before rolling his eyes “Seriously? US MAKING A VIDEO TOMORROW IS THAT IMPORTANT?!” his eyes then go wide seeing Mr. Puzzle pointing his glowing finger at his constraints “Wait dont do it, do you know how rare this controller is?” Ignoring the guardians complaints, Mr.Puzzle fires a bolt of energy at the cord of the controller. SV4 panics and attempts to throw himself out of the way, sadly the bolt was faster burning the cord off of SV4 body. 4 sits there in shock, he slowly looks down seeing the golden controller without a cord. “You're welcome!” shouted Mr.Puzzle as he kept his eyes on the growling SV3, SV4 slowly picked up the controller, a tear running down his face “I will never have something as beautiful…again” SV3 roars seeing the tear coming out of SV4 eyes, Mr. Puzzle readies himself, his hand sparking “This isn't the time SV4, the eldritch creature is about ready to attack!” 

SV4 lets out a shake breath as he gets up and walks to a drawer in the kitchen, pulling out a knife he walks back to the spot where his controller is. Mr.Puzzle keeping his eyes on SV3 quickly peeks at SV4, his screen changes into an expression of shock as he sees SV4 digging into the studio floor with the knife “WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!” SV4 hearing the man shout just picked up the controller and showed it to him “I’m not a monster, I'm doing a grave site for my baby. SO SHOVE IT!”  Mr. Puzzle could only stare at 4, baffled at what was going on. Annoyed at being ignored SV3 summons a tentacle to attack Mr.Puzzle, he smirks as he points at the tentacle blasting it exactly as he did SV4 controller. Since the gamer wasn't planning on helping him, Mr. Puzzle knew what he had to do as he readied his hand at SV3. The moment he was going to blast the creature, SV3 charges at him then collapses. Mr. Puzzle stands there confused about what happened, hearing SV3 hit floor 4 makes a comment as he digs “Caffeine crash..along with too much power must have drained him to sleep.” Mr. Puzzle lifts up the man, the eldritch traits are all gone. No black liquid or tentacles to see, there in his arms was a drained SV3, soundly asleep. “Your theory was right it seems, ahem good work SV4 i shall place him in the room.” As he carries SV3 the dark stains along with any other signs of the eldritch power 3 was throwing around is gone, the studio went back to normal beside a couple of broken furniture. SV4 gives the makeshift grave a sad smile “I will never forget you, ah the memories of fighting for you on ebay…good times.” 

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SV3 frowns seeing SV4 struggle against the restraints “Sorry SV4, I hope you don't mind I used the first thing I found. I really want to go get Liko to help you but…it breaks my heart to think about leaving you alone like this.” nervously, SV3 reaches out and pets 4. Seeing SV4 glaring at him with red eyes, SV3 wondered how this happened when they were playing crash. For a moment he thought the game could be cursed, as he stares at SV4, notices a flicker of something in his eyes. SV3 started to feel his eyes go heavy, shaking his head he knew he had to stay awake if he didnt what would happen to his partner. He wasn't even sure if Mr.Puzzles wasn't acting strange also, the door to the room burst open catching 3’s attention. He gets up staring at the door, surprised.  “Don't you worry now SV4, I wouldn't let down my star after all we have a video to make tomorrow.” SV3 slowly walks towards him “Mr.Puzzle im not doing anything to him, please believe me i think there is something wrong with SV4!”

Mr.Puzzles lifts up his hand firing at SV4, 3 panics as he turns towards the spot “SV4!” Once the smoke cleared up SV3 relaxed, seeing that his partner was safe. Then he noticed the constraints were now broken. “Oh no, what did you do….” SV3 was ready to face the worst, he watched ready for SV4 to attack, only 4 looked down seeing his controller broken and started to cry. Seeing that made SV3 smile slightly “He is still in there, now Mr. Puzzle, it isn't nice to just blast at people!” SV4 then gets up catching SV3 and Mr.Puzzles attention, they watch as he walks to the kitchen grabbing a knife. SV3 feels nervous seeing him with a weapon, he keeps his eyes on the man then relaxes when he sees SV4 digging a hole into the studio floor “Huh…I feel terrible that I got his controller broken, but at least some of SV4 came out for this.” Mr. Puzzle sighs then lifts his finger at SV3 catching him by surprise “W-what? Mr. Puzzle please listen to me, I didn't harm him!” As his hand starts to glow SV3 knew the only fighting chance he had was to knock him off balance, after all 3 wasn't a monster that wanted to fight his friends. SV3 charges at Mr. Puzzle hoping that he can stop the blast, only his body suddenly feels drained of energy as he slams onto the cold floor, everything going dark. 

--------------------------------------------------------------------

SV3 groans as he sits up from his bed, he looks around and sees he is tucked into bed “Did I dream that up?” The door to his room opens catching his attention, he feels himself getting panicked as he sees SV4 walk in the room. SV4 looks up from his psp and looks at SV3 surprised “Hey you're not dead, someone's been sleeping for three days really like that number hm?” SV3 relaxes letting out a giggle before it clicks, he gets up startled at the comment “Asleep for three days?! How? All I remember was…” he closed his eyes thinking over everything that happened. Given SV4 is acting normal things must have gotten fixed at some point, SV4 walks up to him with his cellphone “When you grab me i didn't notice that my phone took a photo, it will be shocking to see.” SV3 tilts his head confused “Grab you?” He looks at his partner's phone and gasps, seeing himself. He felt sick seeing the tentacles around him along with the strange dark liquid that came out of his eyes and hand. “This…can't be, you agreed to walk with me and you started acting weird…right?” SV4 frowns hearing the man's panic “No SV3, you drank coffee and became this mutated creature. You went and hunted down me and box head.” SV3 sits on the bed his hand shaking as tears threaten to escape, SV4 awkwardly looks around the room unsure what to do. SV3 reaches out to hug him only to get a gentle push “I don't do hugs, but I don't blame your reaction it was pretty surprising for us to.” 

SV3 moves himself in order to give himself a hug, he had memories of SV4 acting strange. He swore he never saw himself look like that with his reflections “What…did i do? Did I hurt you guys?” SV4 lets out a soft chuckle “Nope, you kidnapped me and tied me up with my controller which broke me. Ahem you also set box head office on fire. That was pretty funny, but you didn't hurt anyone, you just kept chasing us for some reason.” SV3 stays silent hearing SV4 before breaking down crying, unsure what to do SV4 awkwardly pats 3’s head. SV3 couldn't believe he hallucinated everything while he was tormenting his friends, how much of a monster is he?

SV4 sighs looking at the photo “Would it make you feel better if i tell you, this only happens after you drank coffee?  I think your body isn't a fan of it and well this happens.” he stares at the photo before turning to SV3. The man kept crying into his hands showing no signs of stopping anytime soon, SV4 sighs as he scoots closer to SV3 giving his head another pat. SV3 looks up to SV4 as he wipes his tears attempting to hold back the rest of his tears, he lets out an awkward chuckle “I must look gross and weird without make up huh?” SV4 giggles and shakes his head “Nah you still look good, hell you slayed the eldritch look too.” They both laugh as they continue talking about the event and planning their rematch. -----------------------------------------------------------------------

Present day Liko stared at SV4 in shock, how could something this huge happen and no one bothered to tell her. She watches as SV4 places a small flower on the grave “I was never the same after that,” ignoring SV4 being sad at his makeshift grave Liko asks the question on her mind “Why did no one tell me about this?”  SV4 steps away from the grave and pouts at Liko “Heartless of you to not show empathy over my loss, but to answer you Puzzle said not to talk about it.” Hearing this she nods chugging her coffee, after cleaning her cup she marches to the front door. SV4 slowly follows after her as he watches her reach for the door “Where is the fire?” “I need to go to my lab and see what is causing this,” she turns and smiles softly at SV4 “Thank you for this information, take care of that eye cause those bandages are coming off real soon!” With that she leaves the building, SV4 frowns as he turns, staring at 3’s door. He walks over to open the door, he hums as he enters the room closing the door behind him “SV3 i know your not sleeping, i think we have shared a bed enough times that i would know easy.” SV3 slowly gets up wiping his tears, seeing this SV4 runs over to 3’s side hugging him “Hey hey you're okay, is this because of the coffee?”  SV3 wraps his arms around SV4 crying, they hold each other for a few moments before 3 pulls away “I’m scared to be that monster again, just the smell makes me worry…” 

SV4 gives a soft smile to 3 “Well if it happens again i have your back, as long as we are together coffee can't turn you into a monster!” SV3 slowly smiles before patting the spot next to him “Can you stay the night?” 4 nods as he gets up from the bed, he looks at the time and lets out a dramatic sigh “Gee i guess i could clear my busy gaming time for you,” SV3 chuckles as he watches 4 head out of the room “Hey 4…how did you know I needed you?” SV4 stops walking as places his hand to his chest “I just had a feeling, after all Liko mentioned you freaked out seeing coffee. What kind of partner would I be if I didn't come over? Now let me grab a ds and we can play some games till we sleep.” SV3 blushes as he watches 4 leave the room, he touches his face “oh gosh why did my face get so warm again…” he flops on the bed then looks at the spot next to him with a soft smile “I hope this cold doesn't stop SV4 from sleeping over…” 

[worth-this-and-more]

[TW: sh mentions, violence] [spoilers for legendborn and bloodmarked, read at your own caution ;)]

so i've been rereading and trying to cover up all the legendborn content that happened while i pufff disappeared, and pardon me it is taking more time than i imagined, however i just wanted to start off with one pet peeve of mine

*rant incoming*

this might just be my unorganised thoughts or maybe just common sense, but sometimes you dont fully understand why a character did something; you have to sometimes to come back and read it again once you have that epiphany. it doesn't matter whatever tf they are doing, it sometimes just doesnt make that effect, especially on first read.

when i first read bree lashing out on greer and sar when they touched her hair, i didnt quite understand it. i thought its a cultural thing and moved on. now something about me, im a little fair, by indian standards. not completely clear skin and shit but im on the lighter side. so if im in my village, if im anywhere else wearing something with a bit of skin showing, i automatically get the comments "you're so fair" "what's your skincare" "so lucky" "you'd marry so soon" all that typa shit. and then come the unwanted touches, touching me on any exposed skin. and by any i genuinely mean any exposed skin. that's when i kind of realised why bree was so irritated when they tocuhed her hair, because people sometimes see our nicer features as free estate. and its annoying. and that is when her reaction fully made sense.

when i first read selwyn mesmered bree, i was so angry. i did not want bree to forgive him without him grovelling, ofc, but i also could not understand why he did that. what was his motive?? and why hide it from bree only?? nobody else?? now i've been in my low times since like years, not a big deal. got a lot of scars, some too visible, some not. i dont bother hiding it if im out in public where there's nobody who knows me or nobody who would care enough to ask. but if im with my friends, close people, i hide them all. and its just like valec said, its not to hide something its because of the fear of judgement. and that's when it kind of made sense why selwyn would hide his descent specifically from bree. she has bad experiences with mesmer, no doubt, but even worse with demons. it was a bad call through and through but one that is not unfamiliar. i dont hide my scars for my safety, i hide them because im ashamed.

and when nick killed max and then promptly disappeared into the woods, that was also somehow so out of character in my eyes from him. during grief and in the moments of crushing hopelessness, doesn't everyone want someone?? isnt the obvious reaction supposed to be him coming to bree, and not running away from her?? but that's not what happens yk. i once had a classmate who was not generally the type of person you'd want to be around. he was the type of person who has "trouble" spelt on him in flashing neon red. but after all, we were young, wanted to keep the peace, so i kept the decent communication. he would constantly invade my personal space, unwanted touches, unsolicited comments, it gets annoying. the last straw was when he tried to touch my best friend's schoolbag. i, in a moment of pure rage, threw him against the wall and actually started choking him. when the class managed to get me off of him, he was unconscious. in that moment my bestfriend came to put a hand on my shoulder, i visibly flinched and ran away from there and stayed in the washroom until school was over. this isnt as bad as beheading someone, but the response is familiar. of course he is going to go away rather than come closer; people whose love language is physical touch often have their hate language as isolation. i didnt hurt him purely because he tried to take my bestie's bag, i hurt him because i wanted to. nick didnt kill max purely because he killed his father, he killed him because he wanted to.

there's more of the events where we just kind of make this internal bias that we know what the character is going through and that we would definitely make better decisions, but can you?? do you really think you can or you're just overestimating yourself or underestimating the actual thing going on with the character??

i have made this mistake too, i know. i have taken some time to reflect back though and now i can say that yes i have made harsh judgements too. i am changing that tho because i've got a lottt of time to sit down and think and yeah i guess we all need it time to time.

what im trying to say is, things are not black and white. its a spectrum, there's dark grey light grey. it's a lot. and until and unless you are capable of putting yourself in that type of situation or closer, it's better to not make concrete opinions. shit happens and people do things, real life people are just that, people.

anyways this was a long rant i probably lost my point halfway through but okay whateva

[soulidarity]

focused on your senses

after the bond between the two gets stronger, rafayel senses the blurred line between them

hurt? maybe???? | mentions of rafayels condition | check my notes at the end!

rafayel felt an agonizing amount of pain on his left knee, waking him up from his slumber. it wasn't unusual for him to feel discomfort there when walking, but he never had experienced this, it felt foreign.

as if the pain wasn't his

his brain was spiraling with a million thoughts as he tried to make sense of this, fearing that the cause of this was her.

as quickly as he could, and in a very clumsy matter, he reached for his phone on the nightstand. 12:08, she should be at work. he didn't know if that relieved him or made him worry more.

a ring...

then another...

the pain became stronger, as if needles were constantly stabbing it. moving it didnt seem to make any difference to the amount of pain, not what he usually experienced when he had bad knee days.

another ring...

a grunt could be heard on the other line

"kinda busy yel!" the familiar sound of her gun shooting was heard in the background

"did you hurt your left knee?!" he said frantically

"thats totally not an oddly specific and not a creepy thing to say out of nowhere" another gunshot "yeah i did- how do you... nevermind, can i call you back?"

"yeah, yeah for sure. just, please, stay safe"

the call disconnected, a deafening silence. rafayel took of his shirt and went to the bathroom mirror, the pain once again didnt seem to react to his movement, just a constant. the image of his reflection confirmed his theory, his bond mark glowing.

"ugh... fuck."

hours later, the sound of his number pad lock being unlocked drew him away from his thoughts, as a very agitated mc entered his home, throwing her bag onto the kitchen counter halfhazardly. he would coo at the domesticity of the action if it wasn't for the situation they were in.

"okay, what kinda lemurian bullshit did you pull?"

taken aback, rafayels eyes widened as he guided mc to the couch, raising her left leg onto the foot rest nearby, "i didnt do anything!"

"then how did you know? the wanderer had literally just attacked me when you called. which by the way, new rule. no more calling during work hours unless you're dying. just text me"

"it sure felt like i was dying" rafayel muttered, pouting.

"...huh"

"okay so remember how I told you that when lemurians bond our senses are focused on our partners?"

"yeah... your point?"

"i now feel the pain youre in, it woke me up"

"you were sleeping?"

"i dont think thats the point cutie!"

"right, you're right. sorry just... deflecting, I guess? this is a lot. like, im in pain most of the time so this isn't good"

"that isnt good by itself" rafayel argued "we can focus on that later, first this. why did it show up now? havent we've been... 'bonded' for a while now?"

he thought for a while, trying to come up with a recent significant event of their relationship "could this be the first big injury you have since our trip to the dessert?"

"actually, yes. but ive been in pain before these days" rafayel looked at her sternly "we'll revesit that later, but i think i could've confused it with pain from my own stuff, like, my bad posture and other stuff"

"so what do we do? i can't just not get injured, it's part of the job, but i don't want to hurt you"

"clearly it only bothers me if its a very significant injury, which I really hope you don't get. I wont stop you from doing your job, we'll figure it out as we go, okay?" he geabbed her hands, a reassuring smile on his face. she looked back at him warmly "alright, get me some ice"

hiiii i have some word vomit to do about this so bear with me or stop reading

1- if you dont know what condition raf has, its been said to a lot of time in canon that he has a hard time running, walking, standing, his resting posture even shows that he puts more weight on his right leg. he is also going blind 🤓☝️. i want to explore him losing his senses and abilities due to this undiagnosed issue and starting to feel more from mc from the bond. it is said that his senses are now focused on her, this is probably not what infold meant.

2- lately ive been dealing with my own health issue, to get better i have to do stuff that cause me the same pain that my illness does so i dont take care of my self much which i know is bad in the long run. so yes i am projecting onto yel leave me alone 😔

3- i think this might be a series! i want to explore other senses, not necessarily angsty though!!!!! i love fluff. life is way too dreadful to not have a bit of wimsy writing about two fictional characters

[selen3rr]

ONYX STORM SPOILERS

onyx storm spoilers under the cut you have been warned

okay so obviously there are a lot of theories on who the "new" brother could be. here are the criteria for the candidates:

knew all 5 months (key words: stumble and fall)

is the last person X would ever expect to turn

is missing at the end

someone who feels like they arent given enough (the basis reason as to why someone turns venin)

the candidates:

Garrick

Bodhi

Aaric

Ridoc

Sawyer

Dain

all 6 are 'absent' in the final chapter, or are simply not mentioned/seen by violet

Garrick

garrick being the new brother makes the most sense to me and is the person im leaning towards the MOST

first, he has known for all 5 months

is noted to be missing when Imogen asks Brennan at the end

has 2 signets, so at first people think he doesnt feel the need to be need more

HOWEVER

at the end of I chapter, when he walks away and she asks where he is going, he says he needs to figure something out to help and how he only has enough energy to go to Aretia but not back (nearing burnout)

a lot of people said he was channeling in the tower, but it said the landing below, so i believe a venin was attempting to drain the tower and G got them out of there in time

technically, he was the one (between him and B) who was watching watching X stumble & fall because HE would go with X when X had to go away to get rid of the red rings

saw someone say he hates venin and X read that intention, which makes sense for the 'last person id expect to turn' line

Bodhi

i promise im not biassed bc i dont want it to be him

he has known for all 5 months

technically, he wasnt watching X stumble and fall bc he was at school

he says he only has one signet, but he could be hiding (doesnt know X has 2, only V knows)

is against being X's heir, and wants to fight ('doesn't have enough')

is seen on hands and knees in I chapter, a lot of people think he was channeling

i think he was nearing burnout bc he might've mainfested

theory: he manifested storm wielding and was the one killing the storms, not Theophanie

but why is he not duke, why would X marry V?

X has been HINTING at marriage all throughout OS, it was very obvious

i think he decided to do it bc B was so against being the heir

B might be V's consort in X's absence

marriage to protect V's actions (i.e. knowing X was venin and to give her power politically as she is only a cadet)

i think he is recovering bc Cuir is gravely injured (hole in wing & deep chest laceration)

theory: X's chapter starts when G gets I & Q out of the tower, so realisitically only G could get to X in that timespan since X is south and they are in the town square (more north) bc X is OUTSIDE the city

Ridoc

didn't know all 5 months

didnt watch X stumble & fall

not seen at end but is prob there

eliminated

Sawyer

same reasons as Ridoc

eliminated

Dain

is seen fighting a wyvern w Cath by X's shadows

eliminated

Aaric

its unknown how long he's known, he could have known all 5 months bc of his signet

not said how long ago he manifested

last person X would expect to turn -> he's royalty, duh

is seen going south w his dragon

X is SOUTH on the cliffs

one of my favorite theories on who it could be

literally could have SEEN X stumble and fall

theory: he brought the dragon eggs to the isle's for an army

"Has Aaric manifested?" constant line in the book...

before RY said to look at whos missing, I thought it was Brennan because he's kinda guiding V to look at the ring and testing her memory, i think he def knows smth!

[fishyfishyfishtimes]

KARLEEEN CLOTHES KARLEEEN CLOTHES!!!!!!!!!

I've been itching to redraw Karleeen's various outfits and design her new ones since forever and now I actually sat down and did it over the past few days. I wonder what her favourite colours might be !!

Not much to say here that wouldn't be obvious. When it's cold, Karleeen wears more clothes, and when it's warmer, she prefers to be barefoot and wears less clothes. They don't always cover her abdomen because culturally having your abdomen (arachnid, insect or otherwise) exposed is the same as wearing a top or a short shirt that leaves your human stomach exposed, since taurs don't have anatomy that's one to one with their "species of inspiration". Karleeen's pants tend to be loose because her legs can bend at so many places, and they open at the top (at the top of the cephalothorax or "spider back")!

[littlelightfish]

I would like to remind people that Chilchuck hasn't seen his wife in 4 years.

So he maybe wasn't there to see his daughters become adults, but he was there for the majority of their childhood.

When he left, Mayjack and Flertom were 12, and Puckpatty was 10. They reach adulthood at 14, so maybe yes, he was absent when they were still kids, but that doesn't mean he didn't maintained contact with them afterwards as far as I know. The thing he uses around his neck was a gift from Flertom, and he was using it when he met Laios's party.

[anonymouscheeses]

I'm gonna be shitting and screaming and starting fights if Sera becomes a villain. I can't take sibling angst, Sera loves Emily I swear guys believe meeee.

[dykedvonte]

I hate the stretch lines in the front of Curly's uniform because that means the devs rushed to make a model in like a month or so and thought "They gotta at least know he has huge knockers, gotta know he's got back pain." Cause like what is the thematic importance of his tits having overhang?

What responsibility is that representing? Breast reduction? It shows an inherent greed in his character due to the excess and heshouldletmeholdone and that he clearly is blinded cause if he tries to look down his damn ladder all he's seeing is his own cleavage.

[oceanwithouthermoon]

maybe its just me but i cant stand when people are like "it just doesn't sit right with me how teruhashi thought about aiura 🥺" like yes... its not supposed to ??? because her thinking badly of other girls and prioritizing male validation over everything is one of her main flaws ??? can we talk about that WITHOUT making it seem like shes not allowed to have a single actual flaw without suddenly becoming an awful person? nobody can handle complex female characters at all and its so fucking annoying

[sidesteppostinghours]

ok. question.

ortega ended up hallucinating sidestep after they "died", but sidestep doesnt know about that. they know it got bad, but never the full extent of how their death affected them. so if your sidestep Did learn, if they found out ortega looked for them in every little piece they could, would that change anything for your sidesteps? would their relationship with ortega be any different?

[stupidrant]

Hey yall I dont wanna damper anyones day but @bellaaldamas brought to my attention that trolls potentially messed with Angrb*da’s searches on google to flood it with only mentioning the wh*tew*shing m0d that got deleted back when the PC version came out. This might very well be the case since prior to that, it wasnt ONLY mentioning the mods or mentioning something like that AT ALL. Not to mention the wh*tew*shing m0d picture is one of the main images you see if you search her up. What the actual fuck. Its bad enough theres troll activity or just negativity when you search her up regardless but this is next level deranged. What really confuses me so much is that most people literally dont know, care or even like this mod as much as these trolls are pushing so what exactly is the goal and did they think nobody was gonna notice either?

Maria found more info and apparently you cant even put the mod in the game. The only point of it was to be a model of anti-woke/sweet baby inc. similarly to that of the horrendous angrb*da facetune that predates it 😐 it serves no purpose outside of it being a model so it was literally a FAIL and come to find out, the creator of the mod doesnt even know or care about god of war. WTF.

[soulidarity]

Heyy can I pls request another hurt comfort rafayel x reader fic where you go out with him and he tries to play it cool but he’s having a really hard time with his condition and he’s dizzy/nauseous and struggling to see clearly so he needs you to help him. I love that you’re willing to explore this more it’s so :’)

hiding

out on a date at an amusement park, rafayel has a hard time keeping up

rafayel was a smart man, he thought. by presenting this persona of the whiny, princessy artist, his pain got disguised as a simple tantrum, causing the hunter to just roll her eyes the few times hed make a comment.

he wasn't sure if he wanted her to take him seriously or not. he didnt want pity, he didnt want to stip the date, he didn't want to dissapoint her. he did want to rest.

the artist was proud of himself, they had been in the amusement park for a couple of hours now and he had managed to only jokingly complain three times, playing it off. but now he was facing his mortal enemy.

the teacup ride.

resting against the railing that signaled the queue to the ride, rafayel held his head. apart from his usual leg pain, he was really dizzy. he'd manage to survive the few rollercoasters they'd had gone on, she knew he was afraid of heights so they hadn't gone on any extreme ones.

"you're quiet today, all good?" she asked, mid chewing a churro

he faked a smile, his usual one. "puh-lease cutie, how could i be not good when im with you" he gave her a peck on the cheek "just a bit embarrassed that most people in line are, like, children"

"there are some other young couples in line, dont be shy!" she offered him a bite of the treat, he waved his hand in refusal "i havent gone on this ride since I was a kid with my grandma, I'm so excited"

oh that was just great. the ride had sentimental value. now he HAD to get on.

"you look so adorable when you're excited, cutie"

it took another ten minutes before they got on. he gripped the steering wheel, noticing his shaking hands. shit. maybe he should've eaten the churro, but now it was to late, hed definitely puke it out and mc had already finished it before getting on.

with a loud countdown that hurt his head more than he'd like to admit, the ride started spinning. mc smiling at him as she spun the cup with all her might, a few seconds later she must have noticed rafayels dreadful gaze, slowing the cup down a bit. he could feel her staring as he gripped the side handles. was his façade borken? he couldn't have resisted the one minute the ride lasted? was he that pathetic?

his vision started getting blurry, the familiar white spot aura filling his vision. the tingling sensasion on his legs warning him of the pain that was coming.

the ride ended, she got off before him, offering her hand. maybe out of worry, maybe out od affection or maybe both. he appreciated that it looked just like a normal situation between boyfriend and girlfriend.

he took her hand and went to stand.

pop.

there went his left knee.

a frown was shown on his face, he couldn't fake it anymore. he struggled to straighten his leg to get up. he started panicking. why couldn't he do it? he needed to hurry or she'd start questioning. were they the last people on the ride? he needed to hurry before the ride operator started to pester them. sweat started forming. he could feel mc's grip tighten but, where was she? his vision spotty, not able of making out exactly where everything was.

he felt a familiar arm on his back, then another on the back of his knees. did mc just... pick him up in front of all these people? can fishes die from sunlight? because thats what hed hope would happen as he felt it when they left the shadowed area of the attraction.

he closed his eyes, wrapped his arms around her neck.

"i got you rafayel, hold on just a bit more."

he felt himself being laid down on a bench, the sounds of the park being drowned out. was his hearing also betraying him or had she ran extremely fast to an unoccupied area?

"im gonna lift your pants up to your knees to check if its inflamed, okay?"

her voice sounded as sweet and clear as ever, so no, his hearing wasn't bad. a win he'd happily take.

"rafayel, your knee is definitely injured. why didnt you tell me anything?"

he just grunted, maybe if he ignored everything he could play it off better.

"yel... please... look at me"

he opened his eyes, blinking aggressively to try to get the white spots to leave, but even in between them, he could make out the worried expression on her face

"you were so excited..."

"and you were in pain! when did you start feeling bad"

"well, my knee always hurts, but it started hurting more by the second ride we got on. standing for so long in the queues messes me up a bit. then i started getting dizzy and by the time the teacups were done i had lost a bit of my vision, pretty sure i have a migraine too because god did that annoying music hurt my brain."

"have you ever gone to the doctor? has this happened before?"

he scoffed, "go for what? im fine. and i have gone before, its genetic, has no cure. i can fix my legs a bit with exercise but it hurts to do it, and i spend so much time painting that i honestly forget about it. ive had an mri, the spots and dizziness aren't cause by a tumor, they cant figure our a main cause apart from me staying up in the darkness painting and stress." he sighed "i didnt want to ruin our date with this because im just learning to live with it, today is just a bad day, i can usually handle this."

she looked serious, looking him up and down before turning around and squatting in front of the bench

"get on my back?"

"wh- wha- mc! I'm fine! I can walk"

"I know, but cant i carry my lovely boyfriend?"

rafayel reluctantly got on, he felt a bit embarrassed but at this point, whats he got to lose. he hid his face on her shoulder.

after a few minutes they sat down at a cafe, it was nicely decorated but not a lot of people were there.

"ill get you something to eat, then we're gonna discuss this."

as soon as she left, he slumped into the chair. this was not how he wanted the day to go.

soon after, she came back with a pastry and a milkshake, dropping them off infront of him before sitting down "alright, so what do you want me to do?"

"excuse me?"

"how do you want me to react, how do I help you and when do you rather i leave you alone"

rafayel thought for a bit "i guess, i dont want you to leave, first of all. but dont treat me like im weak, dont pity me... ill try to be more honest about how im feeling so we can take it slow, but i dont want this to change how we hang out, i like what we do. its just... my body being stupid"

she held his hand "its not stupid, things happen. i have my fair amount of medical issues and you know that. do you think im weak because of my heart disease?" rafayel shook his head "see! its not weakness, its just a hurdle, but it shows we can deal with a lot more stuff and it'll take a lot more to bri g us down"

rafayel chuckled "thats corny..."

"yeah well i learnt it from my grandma so be respectful young man!"

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

as soon as i got this request, my brain started giving me a hundred ideas. i landed on this one, but maybe another time if youd like i could explore more of rafayel letting mc help him with his vision and nausea stuff since shed now know about his condition.

once again, this is heavily projecting because i have similar medical issues so i write from my experience, these types of medical conditions can vary a lot from person to person. im not saying the diagnosis on purpose, so that more people can feel represented. most of the symptoms are related to things he has in canon

[faunandfloraas]

im so glad im not the only person that looks at seungmin and goes "❓tism❓" bc he is Way Too Relatable to me as a person w autism

yeah..... like I say it in jest but also..... well, yk. sometimes you notice something and you notice something and you notice something and you go Hmmmm

[lemongogo]

viktor prev 🤖

[theprinceandthewitch]

I really do find it incredibly irritating how TOH plays all sides of the shipping board just because they don't want to upset shippers.

It's why you get Evelyn looking more like Luz than Willow - it's also why her face is never shown. Even if Dana didn't want to get into the Caleb/Evelyn and Philip murder drama, there isn't any reason for her face to be obscured UNLESS the goal wasnt to upset shippers

It's why you get Luz's type of of boy being angsty warrior princes like Hunter - it's also why all of Hunter's important moments involve Luz and not Willow.

This is why you get Hunter dying and coming back to life looking like Caleb pleading with Luz to help him fight Belos in TTT, but then his entire arc culminates with him holding pinkies with Willow FTF. This is why all the interesting themes Hunter brought to the table were completely kneecapped by his relationship with Willow.

It's fucking bizarre LMAO.