#she was glad for it! thats when i found out she likes murder mysteries

[crescentmp3]

im gonna read cards on the table with two friends and discuss it once we're all done! ^^

[walnutcookie]

can i ask what cheddar's curse is :333333333 3 33333 :333 :#3333333333333333333333333333 :3:#3333

HI I AM SO GLAD YOU ASKEDDD. :33 THANK U SO MUCH FOR THIS ASK /GEN. you have unleashed hell i am about to write so many paragraphs /silly /pos

ok to rb!

I need to draw a picture of them without the shadow sometime but. basically that glint in the shadow over cheddars face?

thats not their eye. they dont have an eye there anymore. instead it is a jewel :]c a cheddarstone to be exact. And it is very cursed!

still need to figure out exactly how it goes but when the blue cheese manor burned down they reached for the cursed jewel that their family had and They survived! They technically cannot die! but living isnt exactly easy

inside of them is a ton of Dark almost ink-like goop,, its like. Anti-life force. It seeps through their skin slowly and if it seeps out too much cheddar has to fight for control. if it gets really bad they lose control entirely. the only way to keep it from seeping out is by absorbing pure life force. they can obtain it through being around someone as they die, but more effectively they can kill people themself. Which is pretty easy since!! touching anti-life force kills a person IMMEDIATELY literally all cheddar needs to do is touch someone and theyre dead.

of course, if people knew that she was doing this, theyd be arrested immediately so theyve found ways to be sneaky about it :]c

for one, they cover themself up as best as possible. Literally from the head down its completely covered - giant coat, gloves, boots, etc. plus the hat covers not only the jewel in their eye but the anti-life force goop growing on his face!!! They avoid being in crowds or tightly packed spaces and theyre careful not to ever touch someone - while the clothing helps, it doesnt completely negate the curse, so while a brush of the shoulder may not kill the person itll at least drain them which will look suspicious.

obviously this quote wasnt related but shh its about Universe A. to me

cheddar has basically made themself untouchable (both metaphorically and literally).

say, theoretically, they need to take another victim. theyre travelling with macaroni on oh, say, a train, and they find a random cookie isolated in a train car with nobody around to witness anything. they peel off their glove and put their hand on the victims mouth, muffling their scream and killing the person instantly, and then they gently lower the body down so it doesnt make a noise as it hits the floor. next they use a knife to stab the person a few times - theyre already dead, but since touching them wouldnt give any indicators toward the cause of death, they have the perfect opportunity to create a false story behind the murder of this cookie and frame someone else for it. all they need to do after that is call macaroni to come see and he'll practically do the work for them!!!

ive mentioned this on one of my posts before but i headcanon that macaroni. cannot. stand. mysteries. he has to have them solved ASAP otherwise he CANNOT rest easy. he wont be able to eat or sleep very well at all. it makes him so anxious as much as he loves mysteries

Cheddar uses this to their advantage! theyve created a person in macaroni's head - someone whos lazy, who doesnt put much effort into their work, someone who doesnt rely on real evidence very much. How would someone like cheddar manage to frame someone else for a murder theyve committed and get away with it? especially since cheddar is around macaroni 24/7 and hed never expect them to do something in like the five minutes that they sneak away. not to mention cheddar has been working for the cbi even longer than mac and why on earth would a cbi agent kill someone for (seemingly) no reason??? In reality cheddar is actually much smarter and observant than they make themself seem but mac is in HEAVY denial about it because he doesnt want to have to think about his work partner being a murderer. Better to come up with other solutions (which cheddar so generously offers to him by framing people) than to point the finger at cheddar and raise dozens more questions that may be left unanswered. Plus the thought that all of the deaths cheddar caused would technically partially be macs fault. And as much as cheddar annoys him, mac has grown pretty attached to them.

someone could literally yell at mac and say LOOK!!! CHEDDAR HAS BLOOD STAINS ON THEIR COAT OH MY GOD!!!!!!! and mac will just laugh and say Haha that must be from lunch yesterday :) LIKE. cheddar has just made the perfect alibi for themself. they can never be accused of any crime because mac will defend them no matter what just to keep his own sanity

all of the killing and murder and crime aside cheddar is. Fucking miserable. shes so insanely touch starved bro they havent had a hug since like 1806 (except for like one person CCOUXGGHT COUCGHE GOUCGH ROUCYEO CAPPUCCINO COUGH COUCGH SPUTTER COUGH thats another post entirely though if anyone sends an ask abt it ill talk about it) and they try to make themself seem unlikable towards macaroni and try to distance themself from people and avoid relationships because even just a high five or a brush of the shoulder could be fatal. its too much of a risk, and its not one theyre willing to take.

he is fucking Smitten for macaroni theyre so head over heels for that girl but they just! CANT!!!! they cant get close to him because then he might DIE and not only would they lose the person they love but that would mean that their precious alibi is gone and theyd have to be extra extra sneaky about things to make sure that nobody catches them committing crimes. not to mention because of the way they act macaroni fucking HATES HIM. one sided yuri my beloved

anyways yaay ill stop there before this post gets too long X] theres more stuff about these two (including actual yuriful fluff NO WAAY) if youre curuois or have any other questions just shoot me an ask id love to answer!!!!

as always i dont think this is canon by any means it is all just my silly headcanon au because i think cheddar should be fucked up As a treat👍have a nice day If you read all of this i loveyiu so much /p

[wowzah2nd]

The Lioness and her Serpent lover: A forbidden love story (Draco Malfoy x reader)

Midnight Meetings

part 1, part 2, part3, part3.5

Word count:2k

Within Hogwarts many secretes and mysteries were held some solved and discovered. The castle may hold many secretes but within those wall were student holding their very own secrets. Y/N potter being one of them holding a secret that would shock not only her brother and friends but the whole school it self. What is that secret you may ask well. She was dating non-other the Slytherin prince Draco Malfoy

Under the cloak of darkness, Y/N and Draco found solace in secret midnight meetings by the Black Lake. The stars bore witness to their whispered confessions and stolen kisses, hidden from the prying eyes of the wizarding world.

Later that evening Draco and I decided to meet up near the black lake. We hadn't seen each other since last year and I had missed him so much as I was making my way down from the girls' dorms. I noticed that people were awake so I decided to wait it out till they went to bed. I wasn’t too worried about them coming this way since it sounded like there were only two boys away. But as i was listening i realised it was harry and ron talking curious i decided to inch a bit closer to listen in on their conversation.

Harry: I hate that she seems to always be around him. She says she's just being nice but i don't know i feel like there's more there

Ron: I don't know mate maybe your reading way too much into i mean she's your sister there's no way he would go near her let alone like her

Harry: It give him more of a reason too since she is my sister i bet he’s only nice to her to get under my skin 

Thats ade me a bit angry how could he say that his only being nice to me to get under his skin how self centred is he

Ron: No way mate you give him too much credit to be thinking like that 

Harry: But what if he is what if he just starts out being nice to her, then he starts being friends with her to get closer then boom tries to date her he knows that would piss me off the most 

Ron: I mean he could but come on man Y/N is a nice person she's nice to everyone even every single slytherin house she a literal angel mate

That was a very nice thing of ron to say about it glad his my friend to 

Harry: Well *scoff* Either way i aint letting that happen if he ever gets near her when he doesn't need to be i'm gonna stop it right then and here he ain't getting any closer then he needs to be. 

Ron: Alright mate but I really think you shouldn’t  meddle in her life you see how she gets. One time I told her to slow down eating and she glared at me as if she was going to murder me if I didn't shut up. She didn't physically hit me but man i felt my soul leave my body imagine doing something even worse than that i think you'd end up dead in a ditch somewhere

Harry: Well i dont care shes the only remaining family i have to protect her no matter what

Ron: Your funeral man better hope she doesn’t find out. Let head to bed now i'm pretty tired 

Harry:y eah your right 

As they got up to head to bed i could feel my anger bubbling to the surface but i had to stop my self or else id get caught as soon as they reached the top i bolted out of the common room straight for the lake i nearly got caught by filch but finally made it to the lake

Y/N: i am so sorry for being late my brother and ron were in the common room and i couldn't get past them till they left

Your groaned thinking about the conversation they had how dare harry try to control you life even if you weren secretly dating Draco you can be nice or be friends with anyone 

Draco: its okay but i'm sensing that's not the only reason your seething with anger 

He chuckled i swear if i didn't love him so much i push him into the lake

Y/N: You're not wrong about that, get this harry is planning to keep you away from me by any means necessary and does want you around me unless needed like class. CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT.

Draco : I can and i can't really blame him i do bully him and his friends 

Y/N: don't agree with him plus you've been toning it down, which again thank you for that it was really nice of you to do

Draco: anything for you my love plus I rather you happy with me then angry, you angry is scary

I looked at him shock  what the heck is he being for really right now 

Y/N: that's exactly what ron said when he warned harry, am I that scary

Draco looked worried and scared to answer my question, he didn't even need to answer anymore i could see the answer on his face 

Y/N; oh my god im scary i thought i wasn’t im nice, how can i be scary but nice

Draco laughed at my statement as if what i said was the funniest thing in the world 

Draco; love your the most kind and caring person in the world and when you like that you look so sweet and innocent but when someone crosses you which is rarely your looks could literally kills someone no joke i mean

I stared at him shock what the fuck i mouthed at him unable to get the words out at that he chuckled

Draco: its true pls i've seen it with my own eye when a slytherin from a year above us was bullying a hufflepuff you came rushing in blazing a path behind you and let me say i've never seen someone and scared as that guy trust me and everyone around wouldn't wanna be at the receiving end

I was in  shock, people were that scared of me. That is why the slytherin’s started being nice to me. I thought that was because of Draco but apparently not. 

Y/N I don't know if i should be offended or proud of myself 

I gave a nervous laugh 

Draco: proud cause of you that hufflepuff wasn’t bullied anymore you really help her out 

At the thought of helping someone else it really made me happy and not feel too guilty at scaring people

I leaned my head onto Draco shoulder the leaked really looked beautiful tonight no clouds so the moon was in full view as well as the stars i never wanted this to end 

The i heard bushes rustling 

Y/N: did you hear that 

Draco: yeah i did

He got up from where we were sitting pulling me to stand behind before yelling towards the bush

Draco: Who's there? Come out we know your there 

Draco pulls out his wand pointing it in the direction of the sound. I did the same waiting for whoever was out there to reveal themselves. The wind started to pick up blowing stronger  creating more sound causing me and Draco to tense but then the rustling started again getting closer and closer till..

Y/N: oh thank god its just a dog

It was a cute black dog can’t believe a dog got us all riled up i ended up giggling at the thought

Draco sighed in relief 

draco : glad it was just a dog and not an intruder 

Y/N: me too

I start to walk towards the dog wanting to pet it but Draco grab my hand to stop me

Draco: Hey we don't know this dog what if they have rabies and hurts you

Y/N: don't worry Draco it's a good dog look

The dog started to approach me and sniff my hand, once knowing i wasn't a danger it got up and jumped on me try to lick my face

Y/N: hey stop that 

I laughed at the situation but Draco was still wary of the dog

Draco: oi get off her you annoying dog you're ruining our date 

The dog stopped licking my face then turned to Draco giving him a growl the dog did not like that

Y/N: hey don't growl at him his just trying to protect me and you

I look towards Draco and he looked surprised that i was reprimanding him 

Y/N: don't be mean to the dog his just being friendly aren't you cutie 

The dog stopped growling at Draco and turned back to me looking happy again even wagging his tale 

Draco let out a sigh

Draco: well he seems like he likes you and seems like i'm not gonna win this so ill let it go 

You look at Draco thankfully you always loved animals especially dogs since you were a kid see people taking their dogs on walk and always wishes you had your own fluffy friend

Not that you forgot about you owl O/N she was a sweet bird and will always have number 1 spot in your heart right next to Draco 

You ended up laugh out loud again catching Draco attention 

Draco: Hey what are you laughing about aye 

He asked with a huge smile on his face 

Y/N: oh nothing don’t you worry your pretty little head

He gasped in offence jokingly 

Draco: i can not believe i own girlfriend would hide a secret from me how could you i am deeply wounded

He then turned away from folding his arms like a child throwing a tantrum

I stopped patting the cute black dog and stood up making my way towards Draco still facing away from me 

Y/N: im sorry darling did i hurt you feelings

With a huff he replied

Draco: yes very hurt why would you keep anything from me you loving and amazing boyfriend

I rolled my eyes at his dramatic and fact outburst 

Y/N: how can i make it up to you then 

This tip i tried to make him look at me by trying to make eye contact but he would keep moving 

Draco: you can't do anything i so oh so deeply hurt

He was enjoying this way to much i swear ill get him back for this 

Y/N: would you forgive me if i gave you a kiss

That got him to relax his shoulders seeing that i was winning i decided to go for the kill shot

Y/N: How about a kiss on the lips maybe would that make you forgive 

At that statement he turn around so fact and grabbed me by the waste and gave me a loving but passionate kiss

I put my hands on his cheek to try and deepen the kiss but was rudely interrupted by a loud bark

Y/N: what is wrong with you why are you so mad that his kissing me hmmm

The dog just sat their innocently as if to say i didn't do anything after we stopped kissing i had realised we were out later then we intended 

Y/N: i think we should back into the castle its getting late i dont want you getting in trouble 

Draco: don't worry about me plus i rather you not get in trouble you know how your brother is 

Y/N: your absolutely right about that his such a git  

Draco: i knew that from day one sooo

I laughed thinking of all the time the two fought. They were both so childish at times.

Draco: so can i walk my beautiful Lioness back to her house or will you deny such an honour

He looked at me pleadingly even though he knew i say yes 

Y/N: Of course you can my handsome serpent prince 

I patted the dog once last time before walking backing to Draco ready to leave the lake and back to the castle 

Draco: lead the way princess

I held onto Draco's hand pulling him along with me 

Y/N: not without my prince of course 

At the we laughed today may not have started the best but it ended in the nest way possible 

Being with the one i loved 

[wench-and-jezebel]

Dark Angel Reaction: I and I Am a Camera

Jezebel (@typicalopposite) reacts [with occasional asides by Wench (@scripted-downfall)]

My lovessss!  Well, two of them are

[I missed his accent in the CSIs]

Herbal didn’t you see what happened to Cindy’s boo?! You’re gonna get him dead!!!

Sketch showing off

Oooop ominous shoes

Is! OMG THATS- WAIT MAYBE ITS NOT-  [WHO?!?!?!]  That guy from the Office.  Dwight  [Oh, idk]

HES GONEEEEE!  Mysterious!

[SKYYYYY  (You don’t know them yet btw)]  Ooooo! Newbie  [Nah, they were in the pilot… I mentioned them then too]  Ohhhh  [But they're not mentioned by name until s2 I don't think]

Gosh OC is so pretty!  [I knowwww!]  I love her hairrrr

THAT IS HIM

Mac ded

Oh, not Mac… Just ded

OH NOOOOO I TOLD YOU HE WAS GONNA GET DED!  Poor herbal

[Bruh, that was actually stand-up of Normal]  I was waiting for the orders just like they were…  But YES! RESPECT!

[Max, why tf would you think he'd want to talk to you about it]  Because they all are blind to her bitchiness for some reason  [Why is she making Herbal's friend dying about her?]  ☠️☠️☠️

*sigh*  [Oh, no, what's their drama this time?]  Uh oh  [Oh, never mind, we knew about this.]  Someone is getting doubts  [Indeed]

Also it was a pleasant change her not getting all sour faced to him declining  [This is true]  Wait ‘til she finds out why tho 😮‍💨😮‍💨

☠️☠️☠️☠️ she unzipped her shirt like “I know how to distract him”

If I hadn’t known it was Dwight before I would have there

The head snap: ☠️☠️☠️you’ll Wot?

[Look, I just gotta say... why is Max telling more to OC than she is to her alleged bf]  ☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️  [*cough cough*]  Mindy.  Original Max?  [OMAX]  YES

YOU CAN SAVE ME THE POSTAGE?!?!!  BUDDY, YOU’RE RICH  [asldkfj]  Hmph

Ohhhh nooo

Ooooof! Murder drone

– – – 

Jezebel: Midpoint time!  So… RAINN WILSON!  I love him!  He’s so quirky! 😂😂  But I’m also glad he’s not the bad guy! 😂😂😂

Wench: Idk who he is --- I only know him from gifs and House of a Thousand Corpses --- so... cool?  :)

Jezebel: Also like… Logan is kinda confusing me and maybe I just missed something so correct me if I’m wrong… why is he so concerned with her killing now.., it’s not like he didn’t know she could, and would….

Wench: Yeah, but like… He saw proof of it not being provoked?  I guess?  Like, he was thinking of her as capable but innocent because she escaped as a kid.  And now he found out that she killed someone before she even left, and brutally, too

Jezebel: Fair!  But… Eh I still think the one they did as kids is unfair to judge her for, maybe, maybe not, idk. 😂😂😂

Wench: Nah, I agree… They were kids in a hostile environment, "trained" with extremely harsh methods, and set into a position where they were terrified/not understanding of what was going on.  

Jezebel: And didn’t they think he was one of the like monster things?

Wench: Yeah, I was just typing that :)  A 'nomlie

Jezebel: ☠️ Yeah! So like… I feel like this is gonna frustrate me with Logan now, because before if he had her on a mission or whatever she does for him he wouldn’t have batted an eye at what she did but now it’s like oh she killed someone as a kid? (And I guess with the added bonus of Ben freaking out like he did) she’s sus!

Wench: Yeah, I get it... I do think they drop this soon though, so there is that.  But I could be wrong to, so

Jezebel: Oh! Good if they do!  Also!  NORMALLLL I LOVE YOU!

Wench: :))) Yesss

Jezebel: He is such an ass most eps but he was really sincere and poor buddy was so confused when they were eyeing him like… “but?”

Wench: I knowwww

Jezebel: “Did I say something wrong?” 🥺🥺🥺

Wench: I KNOWWWW

Jezebel: I have also come to the conclusion I am in love with OC! It’s just how it is… My husband’s gonna have to share!

Wench: You have good taste :)

Jezebel: Thank you… And that’s all for midpoint!

– – – 

MURDER DRONEEEEE

[lkjLKJADS;LKFJSADLKFJ THE SILENCER GESTURE]

“What do you call yourself?”  “Max?”  “Maxxxxxx… Maximum girl…. Woman”

Logan’s gonna be like 😮‍💨 Aight I don’t have to worry

HIS LEG

[Well, *someone's* mental, but it ain't Logan]  

I love him

I LOVE HIMMM

This is just post apocalyptic Dwight.  I’m dying

DYING

[aldskfjalksdjf;laksdfj;lsakdfj *chuckles* nooooo]

Nooooo!  Sad backstory… He’s gonna die

🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

[X FILESSSSS!  I love that show]  😂😂😂 I- 👀😮‍💨  [?]  Have never seen it  [How dare]  So sorry 😂😂😂

[Jesus, woman, be tactful]  Right?!?

Buddddddy

Well damn… His survival is just plummeting.  [This is true… I can't remember if he survives]  He’s too likeable

☠️☠️☠️

He always plays a bad guyyyy

Welp… he ded

Ooooop… Good lord.

Logan!  [That got her attention]  😂

“Logan get down”  *Looks directly at it*  Buddy

Well that is ☠️  [I-  wot]

The faces

Pooor Dwight!  (I know that’s not his name lol)  [I don't know his actual name, so you're good]  ☠️☠️☠️

What is this scene! Not the dialogue.  Just the way they’re talking to each other.  Mainly Logan and his rainy window staring

Phil.  His name is Phil

And the bus explodes!  Or- oooop.  Maybe not

Ooooop you’re being sus he’s gonna doubt you more  [I’ve gotta make something actually]

Oh wait HERRRRRR!  WELL I SEE WHAT SHES DOING!

OOOOP!  Him legsss!  Now he can be the sidekick!

That smile was adorable

– – – 

Jezebel: HE DIDNT DIE THANK GOD!  I WAS WORRIED!

Wench: I knew Logan got the exoskeleton so I was concerned too

Jezebel: THAT WAS THE MOST WHOLESOME THING THO!  I loved it!  And the smirk!  But also ooooof manticore lady has the murder drone! Not goood! NOT GOOD!!

Wench: Indeed

Jezebel: But Logan’s about to be upright again! Whooop whooooop!  And if he wasn’t over the thing about max as a kid before he is now

Wench: Which is good!

Jezebel: YES!!  And!  I’m beginning to get ideas for the NORMAL & OC friends fic!

Wench: Yessss!  Lovely :)))

Jezebel: And… I am trying to think of anything else to add… But I think that’s all!!

Wench: Yesss!

[ocean-anchored]

Dear future self... December 13, 2023

It's been a week. I don't fully remember where I left off, if I talked about going for bunch with Daniel last last sunday but starting last week - I went over to Annerieke's again for dinner which wasn't too bad, I kept it light and tight, didn't stay too long but it's been nice to see J. Tuesday I didn't do anything, just relaxed which was good, wednesday went out for wing night with Shane, ugh that's when my instagram got hacked. Seriously still so frustrated about it. I was trying to make peace that I lost everything but then a few days later when talking to Cass my hair dresser she said the process she went through and it took a week to get back but she got it, I had randomly tried friday night to get into it which allowed me to go through the steps of verifying and taking a selfie of myself so I had hopes, but been trying again and still nothing. I'm more just mad I lost everything, like all my stories and highlights which finally I was happy with, I lost all the accounts I was following that was good, I had 740 followers which took years like ugh and all my saved things... like man so so frustrating. Im still holding a bit of hope that it might come back by the end of the week but I guess I have to carry on. I mean its kind of nice because now I've literally barley been on it because there's nothing to look at, I think I follow like 70 people and there's not much to scroll so I'm not inclined to be on it so maybe it's a blessing in disguise... anyways, then Shane came over & we watched some Harry potter. Thursday I did nothing, Friday I got my hair done, my once a year annual time, it didn't turn out how I actually wanted it but thats ok I still like it and it'll be really easy to grow out. I was supposed to go for a xmax pub crawl with Sasha and Shruti that night but they cancelled due to weather, I still tried to see if they want to go for drinks or hang out but they said no which was fine but then I found out later that they hung out together so that was kind of annoying. Saturday I went for santa photos with Nova and then it was Shane's christmas party with 24/7. It was good, I was nervous at first cause I didn't know too many people but it was fun overall. Buffet, comedy was funny and then we played pool for the night which Shane & I won against Tera & Chloe. Shane came over, nothing happened though but it was alright. Kept my boundaries, I'm glad he respects them at least. Sunday afternoon I went to amber & naythan's to dog sit and house sit. Nova did so so good, they all were great for most of the time, only the next morning Rue got grumpy with Nova but ultimately it was great. It was nice to stay there and chill. They came home sunday evening and bought me dinner & we just chatted & hung out for a while. We were talking about NYE and Amber wants to do a murder mystery & asked who I'd bring, I jokingly said Troy and we talked about it more, she said I should invite him but I was nervous cause we really haven't ever talked outside the twice Ive seen him this year in a group setting. I ended up msging him later that night on FB messenger (literally out of nowhere mind you) and invited him & he responded pretty quick & said yes to my surprise.

[vypridae]

OK OK HI DW ABOUT HOW LONG IT TOOK TO ANSWER I WROTE A LOT MYSELF BAHAHSDJKFHASJKFG ANYWAY !!! ANSWERING TIME

HOORAYYY I GET KIRUKIYO !!!! i wonder how much we could go into it tho, like maybe its just implied but like maybe korekiyo after the gang is like "we must Tie Him Up !!" realizes that what his sister felt wasnt love he realized he didnt love her yadda yadda but he realizes in part because of kirumi? because what he felt for when his sister died was different than what he felt when kirumi died?? DUDE??? MAYBE???

OOHOHOHOH WE COULD SO HAVE MIU KILL SOMEONE INSTEAD DUDE THAT WOULD BE SO COOL AUAUGHA, OH MY GOD WHAT IF . OKAY HEAR ME OUT WHAT IF MIU TRIES TO GET KIIBO TO KILL SOMEONE AND IMPLEMENTS A THING TO TRY TO GET THAT TO HAPPEN BUT IT JUST SORT OF BREAKS HIM (AS IN HE LITERALLY CANT FUNCTION BECAUSE IT CONTRASTS WITH SOMETHING IN HIS SYSTEM OR SMTH) AND SO SHE HAS TO COMMIT MURDER HERSELF AND THATS EVIDENCE OR SOMETHING AAUGUAUH AM I SMART

YESS IM SO GLAD U AGREE OMG, rantaro was such an interesting character and ik he was killed first for mystery reasons but like it woudl have been sOO COOL !! TO SEE HIM LIVE EVEN A LITTLE LONGER AND GIVE US MORE OF A REASON TO WONDER ABOUT HIS CHARACTER!!! and yess !! i love that idea actually too, about whatever he tries just failing, auGUUHG !!!

YES I LOVE THE FAKEOUT PROTAGONIST, honestly i wish we had kaede as a protag longer so i had the idea that maybe shuichi get killed off earlier on and haunt kaede like that?? and that eventually delves into a "what would shuichi do" sort of thing when she has to investigate?? idk idk i love the fakeout protag idea tho (in a fangan i was writing with an ex friend we made the protagonist get killed in the first chapter, switch to another character for the investigation, and then the initial protagonist ended up being the mastermind, i was trying to think of a way we could do that but DFGJS i dont think we could)

we could throw out that plotline btw yeah !! im neutral on it (i love the idea that it was a simulation and theyre all still alive and happy and besties irl) but we can come up with another idea!! i have none tho ERNFJKGH i dont have many legitimate criticisms with danganronpa surprisingly (im incapable), including v3's ending, so ive never really thought of stuff like that

WE CAN CHANGE HOW MANY SURVIVORS WE HAVE!! the most we'd be able to have would be 5 if we follow the format of the games (one kill, one blackened, minus chapter 3 with two kills and a blackened) but we could definitely have something different to canon. this is OUR rewrite we get to do what we want :3

i like the case ideas btw !!! personally i say ryoma victim (what if he finds a reason to live and then dies right after? angst <3), himiko killer could be super cool and i feel like we'd have an ishimondo situation if tenko isnt dead yet where she loses it after himiko is discovered, and if we make tenko a victim right after that would be kinda neat :3, tsumugi being a killer also YES btw i love thinking about ideas for her executions

we could have angie survive!! but i also like the idea of her being a blackened idk, i made her a blackened in my personal rewrite (i need to tell u about chapter 5 its so good dude), we can figure that out more when we have other ideas !!! we can so have shinounaga found family tho !!

OK HI SODA HI HI HI I HAD IDEAS FOR THE V3 REWRITE THAT I WANT TO SHARE (IDK IF U WANTED TO SEE THE GENIUS IDEA FOR THE REWRITE WITH THE OC BUT ILL SEND THIS AND THEN IF U WANNA SEE JUS TELL ME) ANYWAY !!!

ok i dont acgtually have too much but!! but but but i do have some ideas right

as of rn ive got two survivors (korekiyo, kokichi), a potential mastermind (miu?), chapter 3's first victim (kirumi), chapter 3's second blackened (korekiyo), and chapter 5's victim (rantaro). idk if this is good or not biut like !!!! ebehebh !!!!

miu being the mastermind is something i had for my own rewrite like with my oc but also i really like the idea, we could also have her do something with kiibo at some point like install a virus on him or wtvr that would make him kill someone? because she operates on him in the game anyway so having her do so and then have that fall into place later but like not give him time to say somethingabout it is really fun to me

kirumi i dont really have a reason for her being the first victim other than im a sucker for kirukiyo and i think he'd be pretty distressed that she died (im being very self indulgent here but we can change this if u want to, idk ur opinions on kirukiyo so !!! its up to u), we could also do something where the murders happened at almost the exact same time so he could have saved her if he had just been somewhere instead of trying to kill someone for his sister to have another "friend" in the afterlife

kokichi i want to live because i love him. end of explanation

rantaro i wanted to die at some point but not at the start, in part bc i love him but also because i think itd be really interesting if he was killed in ch 5 instead of kokichi because he has a lot of importance too, right? so i think a killing with him could be just as good, he could have helped the killer because he wanted them to try to find out the mastermind during his trial or something idk. still in speculation but i think it would be cool

as for like, protagonists and stuff, i have zero idea, but !!!!!! i think it would be super mega awesome to have both kaede and shuichi survive but also that is like not possible because kaede's death made shuichi actually be able to be good and smart at things and not feel bad IDK WE CAN FIGURE THIS OUT AT SOME POINT BUT HERES MY IDEAS SORRY THIS IS A LOT OF PARAGRAPHS

starting out i’m gonna be all over the place with this <33

first off: THE KIRUKIYO ISEA IS SO COOL THO honestly i never thought of that ship, and im not a huge shipper myself outside of bsd so im super neutral about most ships <33 so yeah!!!! we can ahve kirukiyo!!!! i like that!!!! :3 <- since you asked about my opinion on it

ALSO ARE YOU IN MY HEAD OR SOMETHING. MIU MASTERMIND!!! MIU MASTERMIND!!! or if not a mastermind, then in the very least a killer. i can’t tell you how many times i’ve ranted to my rl friends about how miu should’ve gotten to kill somebody. like ik in canon she was supposed to be the killer for 4 but that got swapped last minute but SHE SHOULDVE BEEN ALLOWED TO KILL SOMEBDIY and yes yes yes yes yes she should do something with kiibo that’d be very fun

YOURE SO CORRDCT ON RANTARO BTW his character generally suffers from the fact he was killed off way at the beginning, and ugshdh he could have done. so much. if he was left alive a little longer. i’ve said this before but that’s a common issue just in general with the type of game danganronpa is especially with the writers not adjusting the arcs for their allotted time which causes me PAIN. yeah leave him alive for longer for sure. and oooo i like rantaro, i think he could go either way being a killer or victim. especially if at the end of it all no matter how it goes down, hes wrong. whether he kills the wrong person, or if he’s caught in the middle of a planned murder and happens to be collateral damage/the mistaken victim while he’s trying to go after the mastermind and either way their only lead to the mastermind is now just gone

one of the things i do really like about v3 despite all my criticisms against it, is the fake-out protagonist. i’m not saying we have kaede die again or shuichi goes in her place, but i think it’d be cool to include something like that with one of the cast members? maybe kaito? idk im throwing things at the wall rn but basically im trying to figure out a way to have a character haunt the narrative like kaede did

yeah i ahev no clue about protags either yet, we can always just figure that out down the line sometime🎉🎉🎉

also side note but i propose to throw out the real fiction plotline or whatever it was called that v3 went down in the game, thoughts?

also also second unrelated side note: do we have to keep the 3 survivors? not like the literal characters, just the number. like obviously we wont have everyone survive, but idk let’s not confine ourselves to a number yet

for my input regarding cases: in no particular order/killer - ryoma -> victim/survivor ; himiko -> killer/victim [i think it’d be cool to have her as a killer but i’m not sure how she’d even go about it or even why] ; tenko -> victim ; tsumugi -> killer [i think her execution would be super interesting] aaaand i ahve yet to think about the rest

inout regarding survivors: idk i really want angie to survive and i am shooting you with shinounaga found family propaganda

anyways!!! give your opinion!!! sorry this took me forever to type!!!!!

[hacked-by-jake]

Hey Hbj! 👋

I have a theory: what if our mysterious chief of police, Alan Bloomgate, is MWAF or someone who works with him?

So far, we know from Hannahs psychiatrist that Jennifer was the same age Hannah is currently when she was killed. Assuming that Jennifer, and Hannah now, was in her early 20ies (at least that is what my conclusion is on possibile age), and Jennifers murder happened 10 years ago, could be possible. We know Alan was not the chief of police back then. And Hannah maybe found out something about Jennifers murder and told Alan about it, so him being or working with the MWTF would mean the MWAF would know about it too, and thats why Hannah got kidnapped¹. And we also learned from episode 8 that Alan has some kind of computer knowledge, as Jake had troubles breaking his encryprion, so it is possible he had information of our investigation. As chief, he now has easy access to manny informations and details about it, and can easily cover up for himself as being/orneorkin with the MWAF. And by contacting us, he wants to find out even more about us and what we know.

Possible? Would love to hear your thoughts of it 😊

Hsve a good day/night!

Hey, dear Anon! Yay! Theory Time! *-*

And yes, in fact, I can imagine that very well. This is also one of the theories that I have been thinking about for a very long time, and the probability of this is very high.

As with all other characters, there would still be missing a motive for why he does it, but as I said, we really lack that in everyone.

Since we don’t really know Alan yet, it’s a little hard to judge him. However, with Alan, a little bit like the typical cliché that often exists, I have the feeling that maybe Alan will be in Duskwood of all the cops, the only one who is not corrupt or bad.

It’s just very cliché, but somehow I could also imagine that we could still use the help of Alan very well and that Alan will still help us. He really seems like he really wants to help. In addition, Hannah and he actually talked before she was abducted. Maybe Hannah wanted to talk to him, too, because he’s the only one who can be trusted.

In fact, I believe that we will still be talking to him, and in fact I hope so, because it may help us a lot.🤔

But I think your theory is very good and really possible. Since we don’t have much information on Jennifer’s murder yet, we don’t know yet what role he will play and which he played back then.

In the interrogation with Michael Hanson, Alan does not seem to believe Jennifer’s father, which could also be a sign that Alan is one of the good guys.

If, for example, Michael is really the MWAF, I would rather say that he is working with Alan. I can’t really imagine that Alan could be the MWAF alone. And as I said, in general, the "why?" is missing.Why would he do that? Does that have a reason?

Ahhh! It’s so hard and so confusing, I just need more information, I’m going crazy, but yes, I totally agree with you. I actually like the theory quite much, it would be very interesting if it were really like that. And even with the age of Hannah and Jennifer, I can agree with you.

Thank you so much for sharing your theory and for taking the time. And I’m glad you sent me the theory, I love theories! So, thank you!🥰💚

Have a great day/evenig/night too! Take care of yourself and stay healthy, love! 🌹💜

[brelione]

Endgame(Kiara Carrera X Reader)

Request:with kie with a like super rich kook SO and bringing them to meet the rest of the pogues and they all expect to hate them but then not

Kiara had never liked you.Well, she had never reallly met you.She kind of just assumed you were a bitch.You were what Sarah Cameron thought she was, you came from a ridiculously rich family.

Your mother was a brain surgeon and your father was a famous actor so that obviously meant that you were ridiculously rich.Kie had done a lot of research on you, finding your name on your fathers wikipedia page and from there finding your blog where you posted videos of him behind the scenes and personal interviews with him on your youtube channel.

She was up for 16 hours straight watching all of your videos, memorising your intro song.You had a good one million subscribers, posting a lot of blogs and videos showing things that you had found on the beach.She would blush and giggle at your little comments.

 “Hey, beautiful people!Its your bitch and today im gonna show you guys my new surf board because my old one got broke on an accident.I mean, my wrist also broke so if you were gonna comment on it, trust me.I definitely noticed.So before I get into this video I just want to talk about mental health really quickly.”You paused to take in a quick breath, speaking a bit too fast.

Theres a new suicide game and its getting across social media really quick so please do me a favor and stay safe.It doesnt matter what the problem is now, its only temporary and suicide is a permanent solution.I linked some suicide hotlines and free therapy sources in the description so please just keep yourselves healthy and happy for me, okay?Okay, cool.”You licked your lips, calming down from the quick rant.

“Also drink some fucking water!Its hot out and I almost passed out the other day and make sure you get a snack because this video is already fifteen minutes long and im probably gonna be ranting for another hour.”You grinned at the camera.

Kiara bit into a carrot stick, her knees on her chest as she sat in the recliner of her living room. “Watching another documentary?”Her mother asked, noticing that her daughter hadnt moved in hours.Kie shrugged, focusing on you as you dropped your surfboard. “This is exactly how I broke the first one-fuck!”You laughed, picking it back up.

Eventually the boys started to spam her phone, interrupting her binge watching.She left her house with a sigh, walking out to the dock and waiting for the pogues.Thats when she heard your voice.It was quiet as you walked, wearing white jeans and a light blue button up shirt.

 “So you guys always ask me to show you the beach that I find all of my seashells at so thats what we’re-”You paused, looking over to Kiara.She quickly looked away, pretending to be busy on your phone. “Sorry guys, I just saw a really pretty girl.”You whispered to your phone, continuing your walk.

From there she finally worked up the courage to talk to you.She couldnt simply message you on instagram, you had hundreds of thousands of followers so her dm would get lost with all the others.

So she found her prettiest outfit and walked to your house, knocking on the door.You looked at her through the camera of your doorbell, knowing that you had seen her before.You set down your lap top as you were editing, going to answer the door. 

“Hi...um...hi.”She laughed, not planning on getting this far. “Hi, um...what’s up?”You cringed at your words. “Nothing much.I just live a block away and I just thought id say hi...im sorry.”She laughed again, becoming more anxious.

 “Its fine!So um...I dont know, do you wanna maybe hang out sometime?”You asked, leaning against your doorway.She licked her lips, trying her best not to blush. “Yeah, yeah ok.Um...could I get your number?”She asked, holding her phone.

You nodded, giving her your phone number and telling her to text you whenever.Once the door was closed and she had left you were a squealing mess on your couch, recording. 

“So you guys know that pretty girl I was talking about that I saw?Yeah so I just got her number and im low key freaking out-oh god lets just hope she doesnt watch my channel!”You laughed before finishing the editing process, uploading it to youtube.

Kiara got the notification while she was washing her face, watching the video and absolutely losing her mind.She buried her face in her pillow, squealing before deciding to text you.

Unknown number:hey!Its Kiara.Do you wanna hang out tomorrow?

You smiled, letting out a sigh.You screenshotted it, knowing that it would be fun to look back at in the future.

You:Sounds good!Do you want to come over and we can get coffee or lunch or something?

Kie:Okay!!12?

You:Works for me :)

Kie:Okay!

You were anxious the whole night, trying to figure out what to wear.You couldnt decide, posting a poll on your instagram.They decided that you’d be wearing a dark green romper and sandals.You went to bed early since you’d have to wake up before afternoon, heart pounding.

When you woke up it was eleven and you were already behind, hopping in the shower quickly, drying your hair and brushing it, trying to get it to a soft texture.You didnt want to look like you were trying too hard, deciding not to use all of the hair products you’d usually put in your hair before a meeting or a date.

You got into your outfit quickly, pinning your pin back with bobby pins so you could moisturize your face, grabbing your box of beads and parting your hair.You braided the two groups of hair that framed your face, intertwining the beads along the way, securing it with an elastic.

You sighed, twisting a golden flower ring onto your pinkie before going down stairs to sit in your large living room, waiting for Kiara.Your doorbell alerted you to motion outside, getting excited when you saw Kiara walking up to your front door.

She was wearing a pink tube top, light washed jeans with her hair half up and half down, bracelets hugging her wrists.You got up, answering the door the second she rung the bell. “Hi.”You smiled, phone in your pocket.

 “Hi.”She smiled back, looking up and down at you.The two of you got into your car, you driving as you started your drive to a cafe. “So how are you?”You asked, realising you knew nothing about her. “Im good, what about you?”She asked, hands in her lap. “I was up all night editing which obviously sucked but you know, it is what it is.”You replied, biting your lip.

She smiled, knowing she’d end up watching the video. “Editing what?Like an edits account on instagram?”She asked, cringing at how stupid it sounded.You shook your head, slowing down once you got to the main road, searching for a parking spot.

 “No, I have a youtube channel.I kind of just post random shit and hope for the best.”You answered, pulling up next to the cafe.She nodded, turning to look at you. “That’s cool, what kind of stuff do you post?”She asked, resting her chain against her palm.

You bit your lip, glancing over at the cafe. “I post a lot of interviews and random videos of my dad and sometimes he’ll take me to a set with him and i’ll take videos with the cast.I got to meet Scarlet Johannson so thats cool.”You replied, unbuckling your seatbelt.She grinned.

 “Thats fucking awesome-were they in a movie together?”She asked, wanting to hear you talk more. “A show thats coming to Netflix soon, its kind of like a murder mystery meets greek mythology and my dad plays Zeus.We should watch it together.”You answered.

The car was cool but you felt hot, probably because her eyes were focused on you.She nodded, liking the idea of hanging out with you more. “That’d be awesome.”The two of you went inside, the barista grinning at you.

She had always liked you and liked showing up in your vlogs when you came in to get your coffee with boba.She looked to the unknown girl beside you, a small pout on her face. “What can I get for you ladies?”She asked, already preparing your coffee. 

“What do you want, Kie?”You asked, moving aside so she could see the menu. “Uhhh….whats a green frappe?”She asked, squinting at the menu. “Oh-its like a blended matcha latte with like mint and vanilla.It's really good.”You explained.

The two of you sat with your drinks, Kiara laughing as you stabbed the boba bubbles at the bottom of your cup. “You know whats cool?These straws are made of hemp plastic so its-”She cut you off before you could finish.

 “Biodegradable?”She asked.You nodded, glad someone finally knew what you were talking about. “Yeah!And the company is awesome, they have like 10% of sales going to help the Amazon rain forests and another 10% going to help clean the ocean.”You smiled, taking a sip of coffee.

The afternoon had ended with the two of you on the beach, taking photos of eachother discretely while you finished your drinks, searching for sea glass and watching the sun set.Kiara was freaking out on the inside, knowing that she was pretty much dating a celebrity.

It didnt take long after that first day for her to start showing up in your videos.You held your camera as you two walked down the beach, her hand holding yours and twirling you every once in a while, flashing a smile to the camera. 

“So we’re currently on our way to a place that Kie will not tell me about because shes rude.”You spoke, turning the camera to face you.Kiara simply laughed, placing her chin on your shoulder. “Uh...no its because im good at planning surprises.”She answered, grinning when you gasped.

Two surfboards were on the sand along with a blanket and a basket full of fruits, veggies and sandwiches.You cut the camera, giggling and pulling her into a kiss. “Love you.”She grinned, giggling.

 “Love you too.”You replied, looking down at the boards.It didnt take long for the two of you to be in only your swimsuits, grabbing the boards and heading towards the water.You clipped the camera to your board, making sure it was secure before stating to film, catching a few good waves on camera before focusing more on Kie.

 “There she is, showing off for you guys.”You zoomed in on Kiara as she rode the wave, twisting her body to get a beautiful spin on the dark blue wave.She disappeared under the water, resurfacing with a smile and hair on her face, swimming towards you.

 “Did you see that?”She asked, a proud smirk tugging at her lips.You nodded. “How could I miss it?”You asked, earning an eye roll from your girlfriend. “Shut up.”She splashed you, letting out a loud laugh when you splashed back at her.

Turning off the camera, laying on your stomachs against your boards, holding hands so you wouldnt drift away from eachother.It was heaven. “So...ive been thinking lately.”She started, a nervous look on her face.

You raised an eyebrow, waiting for her to continue. “And I think I want you to meet my friends.”She tapped her fingernails against your surfboard, waiting anxiously for your answer.She had told the boys all about you.

About how you had a huge following on youtube, how your dad was an actor and how you lived in the biggest house on figure eight.She had tried her best to tell them that you werent like the others, that you were fantastic and humble.

But of course they didnt believer her and ‘would believe it when they saw it’.She knew that if she didnt end up introducing you to them sooner or later that she’d lost the chance to introduce you at all.

You nodded, considering it. “Yeah, okay.When?”You asked, hoping you’d at least have time to think about this. “Tomorrow.”She replied, wincing when you let out a small shout. “Tomorrow?Shit-Kie, im not ready!”You exclaimed, covering your mouth when you realised how loud you had been. 

“Babe, chill.Let me pick out your outfit and it’ll be fine.”She insisted.You gave in, the two of you paddling back to the sand, wrapping up in your towels and sitting on the blanket, eating some cutie oranges.

She spent the night at your house, holding on tight to you even though the two of you were in a king sized bed and she had more than enough space to spread out like a starfish.

The morning came too fast, Kiara raiding your closet for something appropriate for the occasion, pleased when she came across a black bathing suit and a yellow shirt along with some jeans, tossing them at you. 

“Babe, you gotta get up.”She told you, already dressed and ready to go.You groaned, finally getting up a few minutes later, slowly changing and not even bothering to pick up your pajamas.You were still sore from last night, stretching your limbs as you pulled the jeans up your body.The boys were spamming her phone, making her annoyed.

Dumb Blonde:Where are you guys

God:Are you bringing them with you

Trash Rat:Dont bring them with you 

Trash Rat:The place is a mess

Trash Rat:Kie

Trash Rat:Kiara

Trash Rat:Kiara Madelyn Klark Carrera

God:Where are you guys

Dumb Blonde:Wait are they the one with the dad that was in that one movie

She ignored their texts, turning off her notifications and sending you a quick smile, promising to get you an iced coffee on the way.You were half asleep in the passengers seat until she handed you a french vanilla iced coffee, slowly becoming awake.

By the time you had finished your coffee she had pulled into John.B’s drive way, hand on your thigh in attempts to calm you down. “You’re gonna be fine, babe.Everyone likes you, they just havent met you yet.”She grinned, getting out of the car.

You squeezed her hand, following her into the house.The boys were all sitting on the couch, looking up once the two of you had entered.JJ immediately looked you up and down, raising an eyebrow.You felt a bit insecure, trying to figure out what he thought of you.

 “This is (Y/N).(Y/N), these are the boys.Thats John.B, thats JJ and thats Pope.”She pointed to each of the boys.The tension in the room was ridiculous until Kiara pulled you into her lap, the boys looking between eachother. “So whats it like having a movie star as a dad?”JJ asked, the first one to speak up.

You bit your bottom lip, pulling at the skin on your hands. “umm...its really cool sometimes.Chris Hemsworth is a family friend so thats cool but like...I cant go anywhere with him when he’s home without getting followed around and there was this one teenage girl stalking him once and she was climbing our house and was watching me sleep.”You answered, relieved when you heard Pope chuckle. 

“Wait, actually?Thats so scary.”He replied, the two of you beginning to calm down a bit.You, John.B and JJ were all conversating about Chris Hemsworth, all of them asking a lot of questions.

 “Wait-who else have you met from the Avengers?”John.B asked. “I met Scarlet Johanson and Chris Evans.”You replied.Kiara smacked your leg. “You met Christ Evans and never told me?”She asked, outraged.

You rolled your eyes, pulling out your phone to show them the vlog that Chris had made an appearance in.Kiara was just confused as to why she had never seen it before you informed her that it was private. 

“Ew-ignore my face.Just wait a few seconds.”You told them, the phone between the circle that had ended up forming. “Oh my god!Its Chris Evans!”JJ shouted, staring at the phone.Chris had leaned over your shoulder, saying a quick ‘hello’ to the camera before Scarlet stole it from you. 

“This is Scarlet Johannson and I have decided to take over my new role as (Y/N)’s mom.Im sorry (Y/M/N) but they’re mine now.”She smiled.Her hair had been dyed a light blonde, red lipstick and light eyeshadow.

You had been freaking out the whole time. “Wait-will you ever see her again?”JJ asked.You hummed, sure that she’d be making an appearance for a Christmas Party. “Can you tell her I love her, please?”He asked, face red. “She reaches my vlogs-do you guys want to be in one?”You offered, remembering that you had your camera in your bag.

They all agreed, excited as you took out your camera, Kiara holding onto you. “So Kiara introduced me to her friends today and JJ has a special message for Scarlet.”You grinned, pointing the camera towards him. “Marry me, please.”He winked, giggling.

Pope flashed a peace sign at the camera, John.B sticking out his tongue and doing finger guns. “This is John.B and this is Pope, and then we have Kie as always.”You pointed the camera at her.She bit her lip, winking at the camera and making you laugh.

 “Oh my god- what is this vlog.”You shook your head, turning off the camera.When you had posted the vlog that night you were spammed with comments demanding JJ’s instagram and of course you had to give the people what they wanted.

JJ was more than happy to have a ton of pretty girls hyping him up in his comments, Pope getting a lot of attention as well.Scarlet had made sure to let you know that she had watched it and to tell JJ that he was too young for her but she was flattered by the offer.But then your instagram was being spammed.You were being tagged in dozens of edits of you and Kie along with one of you and JJ.But the comments on that one were so funny.

Kieand(Y/N)4life:bruh no

(Y/N)officialfanpage:no <3

(Y/N)officialfanpage:Kiara and them are meant to be bb

Kiara(Y/L/N):Kiara and them are meant to be buddy

KIEANDYNAREENDGAME:uhhh isnt it confirmed that Kiara and (Y/N) are dating?

“They’re catching on.”You told Kie, sitting down on the bed and showing her all the things you were tagged in.She grinned, telling you to post and make it official. “You sure?”You asked.She nodded, fixing her hair as you got ready to take a photo, kissing her cheek. She bit her lip, watching you type.

We are endgame.

@poguestyleskye  @jjtheangel @lovelyelinor @messuhp  @outerbongs  @copper-boom  @httpstarkey @teenwaywardasgardian @drewswannabegirl  @simonsbluee   @jiaraendgame  @khiaraaa-in-spacee  @on-socks-off  @abbiesthings @kindahavefeelingskindaheartless @i-love-scott-mccall​

[verdisketch]

gorblimey id love a readmore function on the phone app, lugging my forsaken laptop out is a time and a half, hello and doin' replies

kaoottinenpeitto

i have 30 tomato seedlings ready to go for spring already!

that is fucking EXCELLENT dude. I am so jealous. my housemate does tomato plants and so far only two or three have survived to give us tomatoes, and of them, a lot go to the birds. pretty delicious when we get some, though.

polar-night-scout

I'm depressed but trying to shake it off, also thinking about finishing some old art. I don't think your posts are negative btw. It's necessary discussion that validates the concerns of many people, at least it made me feel less alone

Aw, I'm sorry to hear that. I believe in you shaking it off. I'm in that weird recovery stage where you're kinda-not-depressed but also kinda-not-neurotypical-yet and i wish this upon you as well.

Thanks for saying so - I don't like the comic because of the comedically bad writing, but also because I feel like it would crystalize a lot of harmful views for people in cults/christian cults in particular (which.....reading M1nna's last address, it really does sound like she's been sucked into a cult. very classic 'i was garbage and awful until I found [x] thing and now im better and more enlightened' cult language.) I was never part of a cult, thank god, but the isolating experience of being queer in a catholic church with pamphlets about the evils of gay marriage really does radicalize a person.

but yeah. I'm incredibly glad I'm not the only person who saw this and went this is Very Bad News. Thank you for reaching out.

wavewright62

I got a Cintiq and have managed to figure out enough to get an image started. Have erased all doodles, but at least I know how now brown cow.

Oh fuck yeah bro, I am excited to see your images.

zenit-of-the-sun

Well, ive graduated! So, thats that on that. And in a unrelated note, im currently watching sk8 to the infinity and it is fun.

I HAVE SEEN YOUR REPLIES/MESSAGES I WILL ANSWER SOON - but also CONGRATULATIONS on graduating!!! - and also i LOVE sk8, what a good show.

bogkeep

ive had more time to draw which is nice

yeah man I've seen on twitter you've been more active, I'm glad

notapaladin

I have fallen ass-first into a fandom best described as "noir murder mysteries in 1480s fantasy tenochtitlan" and i am living my best life imagining "but what if the main character & his ambitious, hyperconfident apprentice-turned-future-emperor KISSED"

hmmm. please give me details this sounds fucking incredible

[anythingandeverything1d]

Moved On

“Oh yeah. You’ve already met him and Im going to need my gi- my friend to help me stay calm because I know I’m not going to like him. So get dressed because you can't wear my clothes to her house.” He smirked and added, “even though you definitely pull off the look.” You rolled your eyes and groaned knowing very well you needed to go and help him through the evening for Gemma’s sake. He laughed knowing he won the argument. “I kind of like the friend card.” 

You didnt say anything just took off his shirt and tossed it to the floor. Friends? Really? Is that all we are? Do friends do that? What even was that? Why did I even let that happen? Questions flooded through your mind as you were fixing your hair. You had thrown on a pair of leggings and a hoodie, the hoodie Harry had given you because he accidentally shrunk it in the laundry and it no longer fit him. Harry had thrown on a t-shirt and found his pants but he was sitting on the edge of your bed thoughtfully watching you. “What?” you asked turning around to face him.

“Nothing...” he mumbled standing up. Harry had decided to gain an attitude on the way to Gemma’s and you were not a fan of it. 

The two of you walked up to Gemma’s door. You were standing slightly behind Harry, your heart racing fast. You were nervous and on top of that you were worried about what Gemma and Mical would think of you being there with Harry and not Tom. Would they be able to tell what just went on with Harry? Would they care? Would they figure it out and tell Tom? What would Tom say? Questions were overtaking your mind and Harry was looking at you concerned. “Sorry...did you say something?” you mumbled looking at back at him.

“I asked if you were ready...” Harry looked at the door and you nodded. He slowly knocked and Gemma answered the door almost immediately.

“Harry tell me how it takes you so long to get here. I called over 30 minutes ago...(y/n) lives 5 minutes away..there is absolutely no excuse.”

“I do have an excuse actually. (y/n) was the one taking forever to get ready.” Gemma looked at you, realizing you were actually there with him. 

She smiled and pulled you into a hug. “(y/n)! I’m so glad you're here! Is Tom here too?”

“N-” you were about to answer but Harry cut you off with an eye roll.

“No, why would he be here?”

“Well they are dating...I assumed he would be here too.” Harry shot you a look. You hadn't really had that conversation with him yet and you could tell he was now pissed hearing it from Gemma instead. 

“Well he’s not here.” Harry pushed past Gemma without another glance at you and made his way into the house. “Where’s this boy at Gemma. I want to get this over with.”

Gemma looked at you confused and you sighed walking in behind her. “He went to pick up a pizza for everyone..he should be back soon.”

“So then why were you on my ass about being late. He’s not even here”

“Well had you been here 25 minutes ago he would have been.”

“Well I wasnt here then and he's not here now there shouldn't be any judgement  on my arrival time if you expect me to-”

“Harry can I talk to you for a minute?” you interuppted not giving him a chance to answer. You pulled his arm and dragged him into the guest bedroom. “What’s the attitude for?”

“Why don't you ask your boyfriend? ” Harry snarled. You took a step back and looked at him. You had no idea what to say. He angrily laughed and turned to walk out.

“I was going to tell you. I-”

“Were you? When? When we were having sex? After? When we got to my sisters house? After you realized you had moved on”

“Okay Harry look- I was going to tell you, it just never came up. I didnt really move on and it’s not like we planned on having sex and Tom only asked me yesterday...I didnt even formally accept-”

“But you were planning on it?”

“Yes.” you squeaked out. He didnt even look just walked out, leaving you alone. Tears threatened at your eyes and you sat on the floor trying to calm yourself. Gemma cautiously walked in and knelt next to you.

“Feels like we've been here before.”

You laughed, shooting snot out of your nose as tears fell down your cheeks. She rubbed your back and you looked over. “I’m sorry I ruined your night.”

“You didn’t, if anyone other than Harry did it was me. I shouldn't have brought up Tom when you and Harry walked in with that look.”

“What look?”

She laughed and wiped a tear, “did you and Harry not have sex before coming here?”

Your face burned red and your mouth dropped. “Wha-”

“(y/n)” she laughed. “Harry was glowing. Literally more confident and happy than I have seen him in months. You were too. I mean you a little less than him but also I’m guessing you were feeling a little torn?”

You nodded and wiped your nose. “I did what Harry did to me...I cheated on Tom and and I didnt even regret it.”

Gemma nodded and smiled, “That’s because your heart has always belonged to Harry. It didnt feel like cheating right? It felt natural like it was supposed to be there.”

You nodded and thought about it. Harry was always the one. You could fake your feelings for Tom all you wanted but it never felt the way being with Harry did. You loved Tom like a brother. Harry was the one you wanted to have kids with. You never really connected the dots until now. You had been so mad at Harry for breaking your trust but you had never stopped loving him. You looked at Gemma. “What do I do?”

“I think the best thing is to let him calm down and then try explaining everything...”

You nodded and sadly smiled. “I’m going to go. I need to talk to Tom about everything anyways and I don't want to be the one ruining your evening while Harry tries to get to know Mical.”

“Sure you don't want to stay for the drama?”

You laughed, “I think I would cause more drama than watching it.”

She smiled, “Something tells me that may be the case right now.” You stood up and took a deep breath. 

“Thanks Gem, as always you know just what to say.” You hugged her before walking to the door. You opened it revealing a smiling Mical holding a large pizza. 

“(y/n) what a lovely surprise!” 

“Hi Mical!” you smiled warmly. Harry who was lounging on the couch had wandered into the door frame and was watching everything unfold.

“Are you leaving already?” Mical asked confused.

“Yeah, uh” you sniffled and gave a small smile. “I was actually on my way out to Tom’s.”

“Ah lovely! Would you care for a slice of pizza first?” 

“No- thank you though...I really should be leaving.” you stepped out the door and turned around looking at Gemma. “Thanks Gem.” you said with a nod.

“Anytime love, you know that.” Your eyes caught Harry’s one last time, they burning into yours as Gemma closed the door. You took a deep breath and jumped in the car.

You arrived at Tom’s late. You didnt even know if he was home or awake. You knocked on the door and his roommate opened with a surprised look. “(y/n).”

“Hey, sorry its late is Tom home?”

“Uh yeah come on in, Tom!” he yelled. Tom came walking down the stairs with a smile.

“(y/n)!” he hugged you tightly and smiled. “What are you doing here?”

“I just wanted to talk to you..” you had tears in your eyes and Tom’s expression changed.

“Are you okay?” he asked ushering you to the couch. “Do you want me to make tea?”

“No-no. Thats okay really I’m okay.” you sat down and wiped your eyes. “I uh I just wanted to say- to say I’m sorry.”

“Sorry? What for?”

“Tom, youre so amazing. Youre talented, nice, caring, and not bad to look at either..” you laughed and looked into his eyes. “But-”

“But I’m not Harry Styles.” he finished. You looked surprised. You looked at him and slowly nodded slightly confused. He sighed and looked at you sadly. “I kinda guessed that was coming..you react so much differently to him than to me. I mean tonight when he got here the whole mood shifted. Youre almost like drawn to him. I’ve never seen it before. I wish it was you and I but a part of me knew I could never replace that, and that's okay..”

You were crying now. He was rubbing your back. “I’m sorry Tom. I really do love you its just- its not the same with Harry. I wish you were the one I had these feelings for. It would make everything so much easier.”

“Love is never easy.” he joked.

You nodded and he hugged you tightly. “(y/n) you need to tell Harry how you feel. You need to explain it. You also can tell him if he hurts you again, he will have to deal with me, your neighborhood SpiderMan.” 

You laughed. “We can still be friends right?” He grinned and held your hand.

“Of course, we still have to finish the SpiderMan movies.”

You hugged him and stood up. “Thank you. You really are amazing Tom. Youre going to make a girl really happy.”

“I hope so, maybe when I have more time.” 

He walked you to the door and kissed your cheek. “Bye Tom.”

“Bye (y/n). Good luck, and tell him how you feel.”

“I will...eventually.” He smiled one more time before closing the door.

You took a deep breath. That went way better than you had expected. You decided to go home. After showering and changing clothes you climbed into bed. You wanted to call Harry, but you didnt want to interrupt his evening with Gemma and Mical. You opened a text to him and attempted a few different things before throwing your phone at the foot of the bed. You decided it was better to let him cool off all together so you turned on Netflix and started watching Outerbanks. Before you knew it you were sucked in, watching almost 3 episodes in a row. You heard a noise downstairs at your door and froze hoping you had locked the door. What if someone was looking to kill you because you had your dads compass... Ridiculous, yes but the thought crossed your mind. Eventually the noise went away but you still grabbed your phone in case you needed to call 911 at some point in the night. You decided you had enough murder mystery for the night and turned off the tv, leaving only the light of your phone in the dark. Harry was still on your mind. You wanted him to not be mad at you for so long. You wanted to tell him everything. You decided against your earlier judgement and texted him. *Are you still mad at me*

You turned off the phone and waited, your heart pounding. Every two seconds you checked for an answer, disappointed there wasnt one. You watched the read receipt come on and got anxious for the response you saw he was typing. But then the text bubbles disappeared. You waited another minute for the text but soon realized he was ignoring you. Your heart dropped into your stomach and you turned off the phone. Clearly he was still mad at you. You had drifted into an uncomfortable sleep, tossing and turning all night.

 In the morning you woke up feeling exhausted. You turned and opened your eyes, surprised to find Harry sleeping in the chair across from you. You jumped a little bit and your heart actually felt like it had stopped.”Harry?” you mumbled, sleep still in your voice.

He shifted, opening his eyes and brushing the hair back form his face. He looked at you, his face red.

“What are you doing? How did you-”

“You left your door unlocked.” you could hear the sleep in his voice, it made it 10x deeper. “I needed to see you, to talk to you...but you were sleeping and you looked so sweet I just couldn't wake you.”

“Harry-”

“No, stop.” He stood up and walked over, sitting on the bed next to you. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry for overreacting last night. I’m sorry for taking my frustration out on you. Thats not how a friend treats another friend and we aren't anything more than friends so I had no place to talk.”

“No, Harry.”

“(y/n) just accept my apology. I don't want to lose you...you're a- you're a great friend.” He swallowed and looked at you. You sat up, running your finger over his cheek.

“I love you.” he leaned into your hand and smiled.

“So you still want to be friends?”

“No.” you looked at him and his head fell with a sad expression.

“I understand.” He stood up and began walking you. You realized what he was thinking. You jumped out of bed and ran to him, pulling his wrist towards you.

“Harry. I don't want to be your friend because I want us back.” He stopped, slowly turning to face you.

“You want us back?”

“Yes. I want you and me. I want us to go back to how things were before. I want to love you the way I did before. I want to kiss you whenever I have the chance. I want us to be forever.”

Harry didn't even say anything, he just smiled and kissed you. You reached your arms up around his neck and he lifted you up. Your lips never left his and he grinned whispering, “I love you.”

“I love you.” you kissed him back, drowning in the feeling of his love.

“So Tom?”

“Is out of the picture.” 

“And us?”

“We are whatever you want us to be.”

“I want us to get married.” you stopped and looked at him. His green eyes were twinkling.

“What?”

“I want us to get married.”

You smiled and kissed him again. “Okay.” All of your conflicted feelings had disappeared and a feeling of content had replaced them. You knew Harry would always be the one and there was nothing more you wanted than to spend the rest of your life with him. You knew your feelings would never fade. That much had been proved in the last few months.

He smiled, kissing you again. “Okay.”

---

The ending to the Cheating Series! Hope you enjoy! xoxo

[rjhpandapaws]

A Cup of Something Better

Ch4: Close Encounters of an Educational Variety.

Tonight, as it turned out, was not going to be fine. He honestly felt like he should have known. Changing his schedule always tended to fuck him over. Cooking ran long because he got distracted chatting with Nines, then he once again lost track of time when doing the dishes slowly evolved into cleaning his long neglected kitchen, and now, for the first time in his college career, he was going to be late. Connor prided himself of being punctual, so this was not alright. He would be considerably less anxious if his first class wasn't calculus. The professor already had a mean streak a mile wide, and being late was almost garunteed to set her off. Professor Anderson on the other hand didn't seem to care so long as you didn't disrupt the lecture as you came in.

When the cab arrived on campus, Connor practically launched himself out of it sprinting toward the Math and Science building. He was going to be late either way, but hopefully running would soften the blow. He was glad to have run track and cross country in high school as he was only slightly winded when he arrived at his class. He steeled himself and walked into the lecture hall keeping his head down and shoulders hunched to make himself as small as possible.

"Nice of you to finally join us Mr. Arkait." The raven haired woman snapped, "Do consider being on time next time"

Connor ducked down even more and sank into his seat trying once again to shrink in on himself, "I'm sorry. It won't happen again."

"It had better not." She threatened before she returned to the lecture as though Connor had done nothing wrong to begin with. Like the public humiliation had been for nothing.

Connor kept quiet during the lecture, diligently taking notes and doing everything in his power to avoid being called on. The lecture seemed to drag by slowly, painfully almost. When the class finally ended Connor packed up and rushed out of the lecture hall relieved to be out of there at last. Once he got out of the Math and Science building he took a deep breath and let it out slowly hoping to exhale some of his stress along with it.

As he walked toward building 1, the Language and Arts building, Connor took his travel mug from his bag and took a drink of luke warm coffee. The travel cup didnt keep drinks warm for long, but he had customized it online with one picture of every breed of large dog he'd seen. This was also one downside of evening classes, all of the campus coffee shops were closed so he either had to stop back by work again before school or make a pot of coffee at home. Tonight he did the latter.

He checked his phone when he got to building 1, he had fifteen minutes until his next class started. He took the stairs and headed down a side hallway to get to room 257 sitting on a bench to the left of the door, small and out of the way. He took his phone out again and grabbed his earbuds as well and opened Spotify and then shuffling his liked songs. He dug around in his bag pulling out the short story collection to reread the work they would be going over in lecture. He pulled out his notebook as well so he could organize his thoughts on the piece.

Unlike the nice neat order his calculus notes typically took, his English notes tended just to be a stream of consciousness in bullet-point format. It was the easiest way for him to form the base of his analysis. The music helped him keep from over thinking things, these were his opinions, not his professor's and he needed to keep that in mind.

He didn't take long to get caught up in his work, diligently taking notes until the door to the lecture hall opened. As the previous class filed out he packed up his things, putting his earbuds away and double checking that his phone was indeed on silent. He didn't want anymore mishaps today. Being late for calculus had been enough excitement for one day.

When there was a break in the exiting flood of students Connor slipped into the lecture hall. He walked to his usual seat in the middle of the second row. He put his travel mug up first, then his notebook, his textbook next, and lastly his pencil pouch. With everything situated neatly he sat back. He looked around the lecture hall, his classmates were slowly starting to file in, his eyes roamed to the desk and stopped. On the front left corner of the desk was a Hand Brewed Hope cup. Which by itself wouldn't be much, but he recognized his own handwriting. That made it one of only a few drinks as he was only working the register the back half off the shift.

He set his curiosity aside, he would figure it out soon enough. Connor raised his eyes to the white board to look over the notes for the lecture writing them down. Most of his professors used the smart boards, but Professor Anderson outright refused to, Connor found it endearing. Just as he finished taking down the lecture notes, Professor Anderson entered the lecture hall and once again Connor's world came to a full stop.

The Latte Murderer was his English professor. His crush was his professor. This night was not going to be fine at all. Par for the course at this point.

Connor honestly tried to pay attention, he really did, but he just couldn't. He put in effort into listening to Professor Anderson, but it wouldn't be long before he spaced out and just stared. Literary analysis was hard enough for Connor already, but now his professor himself was a walking distraction. Contrary to his calculus class, this lecture seemed to fly by, likely because he was pleasantly distracted rather than hyper aware of his own presence in the room. The issue being he didn't notice that the lecture was over until his professor spoke.

"Planning on staying here all night kid?" The gruff voice accompanied by the hands coming into view on his desk just about made him jump out of his skin, "Can't say I reccomend it."

Connor looked up. Coffee eyes meeting sky blue, and it took longer than he would have liked to find his words, "Uh, no sir. I just got lost in my thoughts."

"I get it kid, don't worry." He backed off some and Connor began packing his things feeling a bit like a scolded child, "You don't happen to work at a coffee shop do you?"

Connor paused and then nodded standing up and grabbing his travel mug, "Yeah why?" His voice sounded small even to his own ears.

"Just that you look familiar." Professor Anderson said with a slight shrug.

"I also have a twin." Connor was deflecting and he didn't know why. He walked out of the lecture hall looking over his shoulder as Professor Anderson turned out the lights and shut and locked the door, "Good night professor."

"Night kid." The olderman said heading down the opposite hall.

By some miracle, Connor managed to make it into a cab before he broke down and texted Nines, knowing if he was awake he would respond.

Connor: Good news and bad news. Which do you want first.

<Nines3: Good news first, soften the blow

Connor: I know what my mystery bear does for a living

<Nines3: The bad news?

Connor: He's my English professor.

<Nines3: Oh. Well, thats unfortunate. But at least you get a free viewing every Monday

Connor: Not helping Nines.

<Nines3: Well, I'm going back to sleep.

Connor: Night.

Connor paid his fare sulking up to his apartment. He dropped his bag by the door and made his way to the bathroom running a hot bath. Might as well try and end the night on a high note.

[shiro-0197]

aw shiro, my love, don't worry about it!! i only hope you're okay and safe :d please only reply when you're free, and don't feel bad about it!! >:(

my day yesterday was okay, i've just been relaxing, and studying occasionally. went out to explore a nearby town too, it's so pretty there. and much colder (since it's a highlands) of course!! Today was great too. I bought doughnuts (they're amazing?? I love doughnuts), and I had instant ramen, but it was SO spicy I nearly died. (Three bottles of water later, because someone finished all the milk in the household *cough* me *cough*) and I'm still just reeling. Sucks having such low spice tolerance HAHA. I'm listening to some old school hip-hop rn, while typing this out :D how were your two days?

here are some i'll be using to teach english :d and that would honestly be much appreciated, he's getting on my last nerve rn. (I included the first few, what do you think?)

thats such a priceless feeling i so totally agree. you're so precious 🥺🥺 i'm sure they're prouder thank you imagine. you're so dedicated!! i'm sure all that extra research you've done will definitely pay off. it's good that you know what the job is roughly like, so you'll be really prepared when you finally do start it. you know that one scene, in the 2nd season of the great pretender? when the chinese mafia boss emphasizes the importance of a translator in literally everything? (like that book award example) i may be getting the thing muddled up, but i found that so cool. like yeah, a book or speech could be absolutely beautiful, but if everyone can't enjoy it due to it being a different language, it would be such a shame. i just find translators really important. sorry, i'm really dorky haha 🥺🥺

awww but i think your personality type is wonderful. a lot of my favourite characters are intj (they're all so precious istg grrrr) yes!! i was in a tooru brainrot yesterday too 😭😭😭 (saw a bunch of couples on my walk, and I was like "if only Tooru was real grrrr") and yes?? there'd be so much to learn from each and every one of them. dedication from hinata, savage lines from tsukki, kindness from yams/yachi, how to be a dork 101 from atsumu. aaaah 😭😭i'm sorry they're all so wonderful.

No pftttt I totally feel you. I saw some people without masks today and I was like "bro wtf" and just really loudly said "I sure hope everyone starts following the rules so the cases don't increase" because I'm a lil bitch like that xD

awww okay!! I'll definitely keep that in mind. Mayo makes everything better, tbh >.< aww that's understandable! I don't have specific preferences but hearing the phrase "soggy cheese" makes me want to cry somewhere :( I don't like nuts in chocolate. I'm very passionate about that? XD ikr??

I'm surprised too, I usually never pass on murder, but I guess you're just special like that 👉👈 sir I'd get married to you as many times as you'd like 😼 oops sorry for being cheesy, but—you like cheese ;)

U

I won't ask why, don't worry. Since I kinda feel the same about Malaysia tbh. It's a love hate relationship, I think HAHA but yeah 😣😣 i don't look up to US at all, and it sucks because people generally do. And I'm just like ;-; why (no offense to Americans tho lol)

is that even legal omg they're so chaotic?? XD how cute tho. Angel does stuff like that all the time too, but I'd never know that when I first met her (she has the most perfect exterior, and then when you get to know her; she's the biggest dork) Schools opening on the 20th, I can't wait to see her then :] (I can, however, wait for the exams which are scheduled for the 25th ugh)

peanut butter is indeed yellow, not up for discussion hehe :) here's my favourite hues!! I love gentle, soft hues like these (pastels) , for yellow; I don't have a favourite. they're all wonderful

ahhh no that's so precious of you!! :)) I'm smiling rn.

yeah skdhskdjsk I'M JUST SO GRRR. Whenever someone goes "hey Ari can you ______" and we both respond?? The tension?? In the air?? Bro skdjskks. 😔🤚 You share a name with one of the most precious characters too tho!!;

This is Shiro from Voltron hehe. I love him so much, just like I love you (tho I'm sure we both know I love you more <3)

I share a name with a book character. His name is Aristotle Mendoza, but his crush-turned-boyfriend calls him "Ari" (which has been my nickname since I was 12). Reading it for the first time was the BEST feeling ever. It's also my favourite book, "Aristotle and Dante discover the secrets of the universe".

—Ari :D (no pfttt I love the tag so much. I have my own tag, that's like the best thing ever 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺)

Heyyy I'm so sorry for answering so late!! I know you said not to apologize but..... well hmm no excuse I just feel like apologizing, but either way thank you for your patience!!♡ This is the third time I'm rewriting this, and this time I'm doing this in my notes because fuck it😔

Im glad to hear that!! Highlands are always so pretty. Wish we had those here, but it's only steppe here:( Boring~ ooh, donuts!!! They're really good. I havent much, but I tried them like 3 times and they're so good. I really hope I will get to eat more<3 also WHAT'S THOSE NOODLES' NAME I WANNA KNOW- Are you feeling okay now, though? XD

My days were nice!!! Felt as if I had been hiding three bodies, but I've been feeling better lately. We had online school yesterday so I'm excused from the errands for the half of the day, thankfully. But your messages make me very happy. Though I dont always feel like writing a response (or I get stressed because it doenst save) so very sorry for that😔

Ohh those look so pretty!! I'd totally join to just look at them. The colors are so nice🥺 it looks like one of our olympiad prep slides, though better. I dont have the screenshots sadly😩 Either way I really love the little details like the squiggly thingies or the Ж .... they seem unnecessary but the energy changes a lot without them hehe

I really hope they will be🥺 that'd mean a lot to me. And I'm also really hopeful itll work out. I really don't wanna disappoint my family, which is literally just one person. The less people there are, the more it hurts, you know?

Yeah, that scene meant so much to me!! I dknt remember much, but I was very happy they said something like that, because I've been told being a translator wont work out for me. Now look at me, I'm about to tell them to fuck themselves<3 I was also so surprised to see Laurent know that many languages ..... I aspire to be like him😩 And honestly, I havent though so deep of that but you opened my eyes and now I'm about to float off into the next universe😭 dont apologize though, its very cute!!!♥︎♥︎

Heheh, I guess you're right.. every single anime INTJ is a silent sexy mastermind and I love them . ... YEAH every single time I see a passing couple i cry because I dont have anyone 😡💔 and sometimes when I see people doing something amusing (which includes people failing cuz I'm evil) I just imagine one of the characters doing that and I smile all the way xD Honestly, I'd sell my father on black market for a single day with one of them:( though that may sound like a really low price because his cigarette filled lungs wouldnt cost a lot... I sound like my 7th grade self again I'm so sorry

BAHQHHANEJWJD I HOPE THEY WERE EMBARRASED. I HOPE THEY FELT AWKWARD AND OTHER PEOPLE DID TOO, they deserve it. Like, learn your lesson bitch, it's been a year!

Yeah!!! I love mayo, not to the point where I would gulp it down from the package, but it does make dishes taste good. Same, soggy cheese on itself sounds like a dish served in the ninth circle of hell. You should try nuts in honey!! Like, just straight up dip them in honey. Sounds weird, and it doesnt always taste NEJFJKSKF (depends on the honey)but I think it's worth trying xD Walnuts are the best with honey I think

That was so funny ... TOO FUNNY, I LAUGHED FOR LIKE . 3MINUTES STRAIGHT and I do not laugh when I'm tired. You really are special 😭😭😭😭 cheesy ... HAHRNFJJSF

I'm so sorry for being a bully like that but it's so funny how you left a single U there . Its so mysterious, was it in purpose? Or were you lost in the excitement if messaging me?

I was one of those people, honestly 😭 but mostly because I wasnt aware of its political condition, I guess. Maybe theres more than just politics that's bad about US, but honestly, it has more opportunities than this hellfire. Though now I'm more into Norway and Japan. Really wanna travel there :(

Heheh, yeah, we never really show off to strangers at first. I dont know what exactly I mean by we, but you get my point ♡ Good luck though!! I hope it goes well for you<3

Oh they looks so pretty!! They're really wonderful. Like bubblegum and cotton candy and literally anything sweet... it's so cute !!! And I totally agree, there isnt a bad yellow.

HAHAH, honestly, that reminds me of how there were 4 people with the same name in my class, and whenever the teacher did the attendance thing, they would all stand up. Teachers usually dont say the last names, so we always gotta ask which person they mean if theres more than one person with that name, so yeah.. That happened on accident at first, but then they just did it for trolling xD

OH MY GOD HES SO PRETTY? HES SO PRECIOUS?? HUHHH??? I gotta thank Kuro for this wonderful opportunity of sharing a name with someone like .... him🥺

Oh that's so cool!! Also, he has a boyfriend ... I really need to start reading xD it's so cute though! It sounds like such a good book, I'm glad you share a name with him, hehe!!

I also share my real name with one of the characters in a kids' show, and its SO ugly, I'm in pain. Every time my friends see one of those on TV they go

Which is a pain in the ass, it's so embarrassing...........

Awh, okay!! I'm glad you love it, cuz I do too. Because it's your name.... cuz I love u. That was so lame PLEASEJWJDJSJF I HOPE YOUR DAY WAS GREAT !!! LOVE YOU

[hypmicscenarios]

Chance Meeting (2)

A/N broke it up into three parts but you can read full work on Ao3! 

“Riou, Riou, Riou,”you said outloud,”hes....kind of cute isnt he?”,you said, looking down at dog in your lap who was flipped over, demanding belly rubs. “Aaaaa D/N, I think Im catching feelings. not serious though! I mean, we’ve never even held a conversation but...he is cute...and hot..ahhh!”,you covered your face. No no, it was only proof that he was way out of your league if you continued to list the good things about him. When it came to love, you definitely had the least bit of experience in that area. Besides, your cute dog came into your life and you just sort of got into your own routine. Love had become the last thing on your mind. However, you couldn’t stop yourself from being curious about him. “Well, we saw him yesterday. I say our chances might be low. I have to get ready for work anyway, I have the night shift,”you said towards your dog. You didnt mind the night shifts, but you would rather not have them. Your job was in a pinch though and you were simply too kind to say no. You were a waiter at a restaurant. The only thing that bothered you was coming home down the sketchy streets at night, but you always carried pepper spray with....and maybe a mini knife disguised as a pen. You always made it home safe though....until today. Everything was cleaned up at work and the guests were gone. Your boss offered a ride but you declined, saying your place wasn’t too far. Also you were considering his exhaustion. He was sweet, but you knew the night had been pretty busy and you were understaffed. So, you walked home yourself. You always had your headphones on, looking down at your phone. 5 minutes into your walk, you felt like you heard something, so you stopped and turned around. Seeing a mysterious man, dressed in all black. It just smelled trouble. You walked a bit faster, then faster, eventually you found yourself running as fast as you possibly could until you ran into another person, half afraid it was him, but your terrified eyes disappeared once you saw it was Riou. You bit your lips, trying not to cry and spoke,”t-theres a man chasing me and he-”,before you could finish, Riou walked forward, his hands clenched, waiting for the man to show up. Which, he did. “Sir, you should know not to pick on women or any helpless and innocent being at all,”he said firmly. What happened next made your eyes almost pop out of their sockets. Riou had single-handily taken the guy down, like nothing! Was he a police officer or something? That was way too smooth. You saw him take out his phone, assuming he was calling the cops, then he walked back to you. You quickly bowed,”Thank you so much Busujima-san! really, you saved my life,”you looked up,”how can I repay you?” He shook his head in disagreement,”I used to be a naval officer, my whole job is based on protecting those who cannot protect themselves, so no payment is needed.but you should be more careful at night, do you not read or watch the news?” You bit your lip and looked away,”maybe...not. I suppose I should though. I definitely would have let my boss drive me home,”you said. You now had a frown because you were a bit sad you were so careless. “Im sorry, I really will start doing that from now on but still, thank you again, I really appreciate,”you said, looking up with the small smile you could muster up.  “Come on, I’ll take you home. do not leave my side.”he stated firmly. You nodded and spoke,”u-uh, yea, thanks, sir yes sir,”you said and mentally hit yourself. Really? Sir yes sir? But you were surprised when you heard a chuckle. or...you think you heard a chuckle. It was gone too quickly. Did he laugh at you? Why did he have to keep doing more things each time to pull him to you?

Once you arrived at your doorstep, you bowed your head,”sorry for making you go out of your way to take me back. Please get home safe.” You looked up and you couldn’t believe his next words. “theres no need to worry, I live right there,”he said, pointing to the door next to yours. You were neighbors?! Since when! You could have sworn on your life that no one lived next to you, least of all him. Oh no...and you had screamed so many times. Did he hear that too? Before you could process it, he spoke,”have a goodnight then Y/N-san,”and he left, opening the door to his apartment and shutting it. You quickly went into yours and slid down as you shut the door, your dog greeting you. “No fucking way....”,you said aloud, ignoring the consistent licks on your face.  This was all too much, thank god you had no work tomorrow. 

Change of POV to Rio’s

He closed his door and took off his jacket. What an eventful day. And he did that person seemed so shock he lived next to her? He was already aware of the fact, so why weren’t they. and how could they be so careless? This L/N-san was an interesting person. and their paths seemed to cross a lot. He also needed to get some sleep. First, he had to take a shower though. For the rest of the night though, he couldn’t get L/N out of his head. A bit irritated as to why, he forced himself to sleep sooner than expected.  The next day, he woke up and figured it was cleaning duty. He took out the trash first, opening the door and seeing L/N standing there. Riou blinked as she got scared and dropped her keys. “sorry for the scare,”he said and went to take out his trash. As he went back up to the apartment, he saw L/N and their dog, who went towards Riou. “Hes fine, I dont dislike dogs,”Riou said, bending down and giving him a couple of rubs. “I never asked his name.” he said, while petting him. “Ah, D/N, thats his name,”they responded. “I see, Im done with my pets,”he said as he stood up, looking as they laughed and said,”you dont really have to state that...but thanks, he loves them.” Riou nodded and headed back to his place. That person definitely made fun of him and his way of speaking, but he less upset, and more couldn’t stop thinking about their smile. Why was that? No...he should turn on some music, do his chores, workout, and forget about it. A couple of hours later, he sat down on the couch. His shirt was off and sweat was dripping down his body. Suddenly, his phone rang and he furrowed his brows,”how much?”,he asked. Dice responded over the phone,”how rude! I just miss your cooking, say say can I come over today please??,”he asked. Riou answered,”by all means. so, how much?” Dice chuckled,”okay you win, I’ll message you the amount.”

Once Dice showed up, Riou let him in,”eat first, money second,”he said, blinking as Dice hugged him. “Ri-chan I missed you so muchhh”,he said, moving his head in Riou’s chest. Riou couldn’t take the physical display of affections and took Dice off of him,”thanks, the food is ready.” Dice pouted as he mumbled,”not even an I miss you back.” They sat down at the table and Dice spoke,”soooo, whats going on with Doctor Isolation in these parts? anything new? give me something, you never have anything.” Riou sighed as he ate his food,”I rescued the person who lives next to me from the attacker on the news, will that suffice?”,he said. Dice’s eyes lit up,”Woah! How cool! were they cute?” Riou lowered his eyes,”why is that of any concern? you should just be glad theyre safe.” Dice smirked,”and...do you know their name?” “Yes, why?”,he answered.  “do you think theyre cute?”  “no comment.” 

“you need more friends you know...or even a partner,”Dice said. “I have you, why would I need more?”, Riou asked. Dice frowned,”I make you hang out with me. I want you to have someone you want to hangout with...even though you never make plans with me.” Riou rolled his eyes,”thats because thats you job.” Dice continued to question him about L/N that he eventually kicked the other out...but of course L/N had to be coming back from work. “Dice n-”

“Hey hey! my names Dice! Im this loners friend,”he said as he pointed at Riou,”please take care of him, I’ll leave him in your care,”he turned around,”They are cute by the way, just like you said,”Dice said with a wink, knowing it would it make him mad. He held onto his bag of money and dipped before he was choked,”Buh-bye Ri-chan!~” Riou sighed and looked towards L/N,”sorry...he’s a handful. have a good day.” and then he left. Its not like he could exactly deny what Dice said, then that would just put him in an even stickier situation! He sighed and flopped down on his couch, planning out Dice’s murder in his head.

[rosapeachhogwartsmystery]

Wearing Bloody Heels for the Yule Ball (Hogwarts Mystery Imagine - HPHM Fictober 2018 day 19 - fem!reader x Barnaby Lee)

Masterlist  (To view my Masterlist, visit my Tumblr page)

Prompt: Yule Ball (day 19 of @hphm-fictober)

Summary:

It was time for one of the biggest events of the year: The Yule Ball. Everything seemed to be prefect for you, at least that was what everyone thought. You would go with your boyfriend, what could not be perfect about that? You knew the answer: wearing a formal dress and those high heels your mother had picked out for you. So, when the Yule Ball was finally happening, you spent a lot  of time worrying about you being a disaster on those heels. You could only hope things would go your way, so you won’t ruin your and your date’s night...

Pairing: fem!reader x Barnaby Lee

Words: 3.2k

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“Y/N, come out already…!”

You and the girls had been preparing yourselves for the Yule Ball that was about to happen in few hours. However, you have been feeling quite nervous. Almost so nervous you were feeling nauseous the whole day. The only times you wore a fancy dress like this was when your parents invited some guests from the ministry over. This was different though… When you had those dinners with your parents, you mostly had to sit down and look pretty. That was a good thing, because that way the people wouldn’t see how clumsy you were when you wore dresses and heels like these. Just looking at yourself like this was making you feel slightly uncomfortable. Sure, you looked nice, but you would have preferred wearing something slightly more comfortable.

“Y/N, this is getting ridiculous. Just show us your outfit already.” Merula said, getting impatient.

You sighed softly and slowly opened the door.

Penny squealed in delight when she saw you. “Y/N, I don’t know what you are nervous about, that dress looks amazing on you!”

Merula snorted slightly. “For a moment I thought you were going to wear that old-fashioned dress you got once. Really, I don’t understand why you are so nervous.”

��Rowan looked at Penny and Merula. “I don’t know if you have ever seen Y/N in heels before, but I can assure you she has her reasons to be nervous.” She knew what made you nervous. You had told her about you being clumsy in heels and dresses like these.

“Why don’t you just wear flats?” Tonks asked, raising an eyebrow at you.

“My mom would probably murder me…” You mumbled. “She was the one who helped me pick out this dress and heels.”

“Didn’t she also say something like ‘a real lady learns how to walk and dance in heels’?” Rowan pointed out.

“Hm… And Skeeter would probably write something about the Yule Ball. If Y/N wears flats during the ball, her mom would probably figure it out.” Tulip said.

“Maybe you should just concentrate on having fun, Y/N. If you don’t think about how difficult heels are to walk and dance on, you might end up doing a lot better on them.” Penny suggested with a smile.

“Or you should just laugh whenever you trip. That’s what I do whenever I trip over my own feet.” Tonks said with a grin.

Merula narrowed her eyes a little. “Tonks, that’s not going to help Y/N with feeling less nervous…”

  “Just think about your date!” Penny quickly said with a smile. “Aren’t you excited about that?”

Your date… You definitely were excited for that. You began dating him not too long ago, however it made things easier for the both of you who to take to the Yule Ball. You two didn’t feel stressed out because you two didn’t know who you should take to the Yule Ball. It was like you two already assumed to go together to the Yule Ball without actually asking each other. Well, it wasn’t until he brought it up he never actually asked you to go with him and asked you to go with him to the Yule Ball officially.

“Oh, I suddenly see why those high heels are necessary.” Merula chuckled. “You also need to wear them to be a little taller to make it easier for Barnaby to dance with you.”

You rolled your eyes and blushed a little. “I’m not that small…”

“No, he is just very tall for his age.” Tulip said amused.

“Luckily, you two are about the same height, huh?” You mumbled softly with a small smirk.

Tonks snorted when she noticed Tulip and Merula were blushing.

  “Come on, Y/N. Let me do your hair and make-up.” Penny said. “The rest of us are already done.”

“Once Penny is done with you, you might be aware boys’ jaws are going to drop. She is a genius when it comes to make up.” Tonks said with a grin.

Penny huffed, looking amused. “I’m not a genius when it comes to make-up, Tonks. I just know some simple tricks, that’s all.”

“But you know what you are doing.” Merula said honestly.

“You managed to make everyone look very good for this evening, including yourself.” Rowan said with a smile.

Penny blushed a little. “You guys give me a little bit too much credits. It’s not even like I have done that much.”

“Well, it’s not like we all could do it as well as you could.” Tulip said with a shrug.

“I almost never wear make-up, to be honest.” Rowan said.

“I do, but that definitely is different from doing make-up for a ball.” Merula mumbled.

“Okay, okay, I get it.” Penny said, feeling a little flustered. “Y/N, this will take a little while.” She mumbled when she began doing your hair and make-up.

  “Have you guys seen the girls already?” Charlie asked, feeling slightly uncomfortable in the suit he was wearing. “I’ll be glad when the even is over and I can wear something else again.”

“They will be there soon and hush. You look very good in that suit.” Andre said.

“It’s better than the last suit you got from mom.” Bill said with a grin.

Charlie grimaced a little. “You know what? I actually like this suit.” He quickly mumbled.

Andre chuckled softly, shaking his head a little before he turned to Barnaby. “Y/N’s jaw is probably going to drop when she sees you in a suit.” He said with a grin.

“You think so?” Barnaby asked. “I really don’t know what she is going to think about it.”

“Don’t doubt my fashion sense, you look great. She will definitely love it.” Andre said with a wink.

Charlie moved a little closer to Barnaby and whispered. “I can’t understand how he is so sure about this…”

“That’s because I know what I’m doing, Charlie.” Andre said, giving Charlie a look.

“What if you are never sure…?” Ben asked softly.

“It’s all about the confidence, Ben.” Andre said with a smile. “Come on, Ben. Smile a little, this is a night not many people will forget.”

  “Oh look! There they are.” Charlie said with a smile, pointing in a certain direction.

Barnaby immediately looked at the direction, feeling slightly nervous now. You two dated for a little while, but this was definitely something you both never experienced before. He hoped he would be able to impress you.

“Hey guys.” Penny said when she walked over to the guys first.

“Damn, Penny. You definitely did some good work.” Andre said with a grin.

“Oh, it’s not that much, really.” Penny said with a smile.  “Ready to dance tonight, Andre?”

“Definitely, I hope you can keep up with me.” Andre said with a wink.

“I think it is you who should be worried to keep up with me.” Penny smirked lightly.

“So, there will be a dance battle tonight?” Tonks asked amused. “I guess we found something we can do Char.”

“Don’t tell me you are going to bet on them…” Charlie mumbled.

“Ah, come on. It will be fun.” Tonks said with a grin. “Just say, if I’m right you will look the other way when I will pull a prank, young prefect.”

“Like I have never looked the other way when you pulled a prank, Tonks.” Charlie huffed.

  It took a little while before Barnaby’s eyes met yours. You both didn’t seem to be able to look away from each other. You slowly made your way over to him, looking quite nervous.

“Hey Barnaby.” You greeted softly when you were close to him.

Barnaby was still looking at you. He had never seen you wear something like this before. You definitely looked pretty. Of course, he thought you would look pretty regardless what you wore, but it was definitely something special.

You blushed a little. “Barnaby?” You said, wondering if he even heard you.

“O-oh! Sorry Y/N.” He said quickly and then he gave you a smile. “You look very pretty tonight.” He basically blurted out.

“Ah, thank you, I’m glad you like it.” You said honestly. “You also look really handsome tonight.” You admitted.

“Thanks.” He said softly before he gently took one of your hands in his. “Shall we go in?” He suggested.

You nodded and gave him a smile. So far, you didn’t have much issues with your heels yet, besides the fact they weren’t really comfortable to walk on. You tried to follow Penny’s advice to focus on having fun instead of worrying about being clumsy on heels.

  Barnaby suddenly looked a little confused at you when you two walked inside the Great Hall. “There is something else that is different about you as well.” He mumbled.

You blinked, wondering what he was talking about. “Something different?” You asked softly.

“Ah, I know what it is.” He said with a grin. “You are taller than usual.” He pointed out.

Of course, he would notice something like that. It kind of drifted your mind to the bloody heels you were wearing. “Eh… I’m wearing heels under the dress, Barney.” You mumbled softly.

“Oh, I get it.” He said. “Although, I always wonder why girls feel like they need to wear heels. I mean, you don’t need to be taller, right?”

His way of thinking was definitely cute, you couldn’t help it but to giggle softly. “I think it some sort of fashion statement. Maybe Andre knows why women wear heels.”

“Hm, maybe I should do that later.” He said honestly. “However, we should probably have a dance first.”

“Do you know how to dance?” You asked him, wondering if he would be a good dancer.

“I think I do. I might not be the best, but I know the basics.” He smiled.

On flats you knew how to dance a little, however, you didn’t know how things would turn out now.

  “I hope I will be able to lead you well, during the dance.” Barnaby said honestly. “I mean, this will be our first dance together, so it should be special, right?”

You blushed slightly and nodded. “I’m sure you will be able to lead well.” You told him, knowing he was trying his best for you to make the night special. However, you were afraid you would not be able to make the dance very special. What is you step on his feet? Or what if you trip? You could already see yourself making a fool out of yourself in front of him.

“Y/N?” Barnaby said, pulling you away from your thoughts.

“What is it?” You asked.

He looked a little worried. “You seemed to be frowning a little. Are you all right?”

You quickly gave him a smile, although it probably didn’t look too honest. “I’m fine, don’t worry.”

“If you are sure.” He said, not looking completely convinced.

  You both found your friends in the Great Hall again and joined them to listen to Dumbledore’s opening speech for the Yule Ball. The speech was short and soon after that, the music began playing. It took a few minutes before pairs began going to the dancefloor. Andre and Penny were one of the first pairs that joined the dance. Tonks was amused when she noticed Andre and Penny were quite serious about the dance. Then she smirked and pulled Charlie along on the dancefloor with her. After all, they both agreed to go together as friends. Tonks definitely wanted to have some fun, even with the formal dancing.

Barnaby offered an arm to you and you knew it was time you would join the dancefloor as well. You slowly took his arm, letting him lead you to the dancefloor. You were impressed with Barnaby’s dancing skills. He was definitely able to lead you well despite you were still having issues with the heels. At least you didn’t step on his feet. You definitely enjoyed the dancing a lot more than you expected. Barnaby made you feel much more comfortable than you realized. The way he held you was almost delicate, like he was afraid to hurt you, but he still held you tight enough to lift you in the air during the dance.

  After a little while, you two decided to take a break and get something to drink. He led you to a table before he told you he would get you something. You slowly sat down on a chair, taking a deep breath. If there was one word to describe the dance then it was magical.

“It’s seems like you had quite some fun, Y/N.”

You blinked when you realized Tonks took a chair next to yours. “O-oh. I definitely did have some fun.” You admitted, blushing lightly

“Your feet seemed to work along with you.” Tonks said amused. “Mine really didn’t work along. I think I was stepped on Charlie’s feet too many times.” She laughed. “Maybe that’s why he decided to take a break.”

“I’m sure he will be fine.” You said with a small grin.

“Well, he should have expected it. I mean, he knows how clumsy I can be.” Tonks shrugged. Tonks looked at a certain direction before she stood up again. “I probably shouldn’t interrupt your date, have fun.” She winked before she left again.

  You looked up when you noticed Barnaby approached you again.

“Here.” He said with a smile when he handed you a drink.

“Thanks.” You said when you took the drink.

Barnaby sat down next to you and gave you a sweet smile. “You really seemed to be enjoying the dance, Y/N.”

“Oh, I am.” You said honestly with smile. “You are enjoying it too, right?”

“Definitely.” He said honestly. “I mean, I was worried for a moment that I would screw it up. But I’m glad it didn’t.”

You blinked. “You were? But you seemed to really know what you were doing.”

“Well, I suppose I was still nervous. I mean, like I said, I wanted this night to be special for us.”

You blushed a little, wondering how on Earth you managed to date someone as sweet as he was. “I think this night is already very special.”

“I’m glad.” He smiled brightly.

You two just sat down for a little while, talking with each other until you both finished your drink. Hopefully, the next part of the ball will go as well for you as the first part.

  You and Barnaby walked back to the dancefloor, for a second round of dancing. You noticed Penny and Andre were still dancing. They still seemed to be serious and passionate about it. You quickly turned to Barnaby though. He once again gave you a bright smile, ready to lead you again. You smiled back at him and allowed him to take the lead again. Just like the first time, he managed to make it all seem so easy. You didn’t know how he did it, but he even managed to make you feel like you knew what you were doing. It was almost like he enchanted you during the dance, but you knew that was just your imagination.

Maybe there was no need for you to be so worried in the first place. Maybe you were able to do more on heels than you thought you could. Maybe you weren’t as clumsy as you thought. Or Barnaby made you feel comfortable enough to not think about any problems and gave you a confidence boost. Either way, you were glad you weren’t making a fool out of yourself.

  Of course, one of the last steps of the dance ended up not too well. You could tell your ankle moved in a way it should not move and you ended up falling against Barnaby. Luckily, Barnaby was strong and quick enough to support you.

“Are you all right?” He asked you, looking slightly concerned.

You were blushing, wondering if you had perhaps jinxed yourself by thinking everything went fine during the dance. “I think so.” You said softly. “I’m sorry for falling against you.”

“Don’t worry about it.” He said honestly, giving you a small smile.

You gave him a smile back before you tried to stand on your feet again. You hissed softly when you tried stand on the foot you made the misstep with. You could already guess you had twisted it.

He frowned lightly. “That doesn’t seem to be good…” He mumbled before he simply lifted you up from the floor and carried you over to a place to sit down

You began blushing even more when he just carried you. “B-Barnaby!” You mumbled slightly panicked. “Y-you don’t need to carry me, really.”

“But it is clear you can’t stand on it.” He simply said. “Besides, it’s not like it is a problem for me to carry you.”

  Barnaby gently sat you down on a chair before he sat down next to you. “Could you lift your foot for me?” He asked.

You blinked before you nodded lightly. You lifted your foot and he gently put your foot on his upper legs. You wondered what he was going to do.

He looked at your ankle and nodded slightly, like he was examining it. He gently took your heel off and places it somewhere else. “That doesn’t look too good, Y/N.” He said honestly. “Maybe we can take you to Madam Pomfrey to heal it.”

“Yeah, I probably should do that.” You said honestly, biting your lips lightly. “I’m sorry…”

He blinked. “What for?” He didn’t understand what you could be apologizing for.

“For messing it up.” You mumbled softly, blushing slightly more.

“What did you mess up?” He asked, feeling even more confused.

“Well… You know… Making a wrong step and twisting my ankle…” You mumbled almost too quiet for him to hear.

“Y/N, it’s not like you made a wrong step and twisted your ankle on purpose.” He said seriously. “It was just an accident.”

“Still, I could have practiced on these stupid heels more.” You muttered, looking slightly away from him.

  Barnaby frowned and then he gently put your foot down again. He moved his chair closer to yours and then gently lifted your chin with his hand, looking into your eyes. “Y/N. You didn’t mess anything up.”

‘But-”

“Really, you did nothing to mess it up. Things like that happen.” He said seriously.

You sighed softly. Maybe you were making a fuss over nothing… Maybe things like these could happen no matter how much you would try to prevent it.

Barnaby gave you a small smile. “There is no need to worry about something like this. Just try to enjoy the rest of the evening, all right?”

You nodded slightly and gave him a small smile back. “You are probably right.”

He gently moved his face closer to yours and gave you a gentle kiss.

You kissed him back, slowly feeling more comfortable again.

Once he pulled back he gently took your hands in his. “Should I bring you to Madam Pomfrey now?”

You nodded. “That’s probably for the best.”

He gave you a smile and then he gently helped you up.

  “Just ditch those heels if they annoy you, Y/N.” Barnaby said when he helped you over to Madam Pomfrey.

That was the moment you left your heels behind. You wanted to enjoy the rest of the ball with Barnaby without worrying about wearing heels. You didn’t even look at them until the ball was over. You danced on them like your mom wanted you to do, so you felt fulfilled your mom’s request.

[roseok]

Sunflower Girl

Kim Taehyung | Roommates AU | Romance | Campus Romance | High School to College | Enemies to lovers | Fluff | Angst | Implied Smut

COUNT—20, 848 words ↳ A/N: First series written in early 2016 too! 

❝Taehyung: killer of flowers and wrecker of hearts. With a high school history you can’t get over and a problematic roommate you can’t avoid, life is great until you’re forced to live under Kim Taehyung’s roof.❞

Prologue

Knock

“Y/N,”

Knock

“I need to talk to you Y/N,”

It was a cycle. A vicious cycle of early morning wake-ups and pretending to be dead asleep to having your sister rip open your bedroom door anyway. Slipping under your covers, she nestles her tired body up against your back. Wrapping her arms around your waist, she buries her head between your shoulder blades and cries.

Lifting your gaze to the only source of light in your room you groan as your alarm clock emits the warning numbers of dawn.

“You know Mia, I wake up in two hours for my graduation ceremony,” you rasp, the morning tendrils clinging to your vocal chords. “What is it now?”

“Don’t leave,” she sobs, turning onto her back but still holding you tight. “Fuck, I guess it’s just the insecurities and loneliness talking, but I couldn’t sleep after thinking so hard about it and I don’t want you to leave the city. I don’t want you to leave me. I want you to come to my college and I want us to be close forever.”

Turning onto your back, you both stare at the glow-in-the-dark stars glued to your ceiling.

Their glow had faded significantly over the years and the thought of tearing them down after so many nights of saving you from nightmares scared you more than you’d like to admit as an adult. You thought that maybe, the karma of the universe would push you into the perils of catch up nightmares, so they stayed.

“Please don’t go,” she begs, nestling her face into your shoulder. “I’ll be good. I’ll even drink less alcohol, just don’t leave me alone in this hole.”

Letting a river of discomfort and grief flood your disgruntled morning self, you sink further down into your duvet with a frustrated sigh. You still hadn’t told your family that any semblance of an opportunity of going to a university far away had disintegrated in less than a week and that you had decided to stay instead. What else could you do?

“Mia, I’m not going,” you whisper. “Something happened and I didn’t end up getting the required grade for Brown. So, you don’t have to worry about being lonely, I guess I’m staying here. So go away so I can sleep before I murder you.”

“Something? Are you talking about Taehyung?” she asks, yawing into her hand. “If you are, I’m going to hug him. You and me forever. ”

“Don’t even say his name,” you croak, pulling the sheets back over your face. “Now, if you don’t mind, I’d like to sleep so I don’t look like an axe murderer in my graduation photos.”

“If something was meant to happen Y/N, it would. Stop being dramatic, the kid doesn’t sound that bad at all. So he lied to you, big whoop. Did you die? NO.” she shouts, her voice too loud for the mush that was your morning brain. “I’m glad he did to be honest. I think I might hug him when I see him. Thats how glad I am.” she says, squeezing you tighter before leaving you to slumber the last remaining hours of being a high school student.

“Like hell you will,” you whisper as she leaves. “Kim Taehyung is a murderer of dreams and flowers and all things in between.”

She laughs as she closes the door behind her, “Be careful there sis, love and hate are separated by a very thin curtain. You might just burn it down with all that fire of yours.”

Sinking back into your sheets, you mull over every single interaction you’ve ever had with him. You didn’t have that many, but they filled you with regret and anxiety. You felt hopeless and tormented by his stupid grin, his stupid toe nail clipping eyes, his soft brown hair and his baritone laugh.

You hated him. You hated Kim Taehyung.

In your freshmen year of high school you decide against being surprised by anything Kim Taehyung does and will ever do. He was popular, smart and kind. He was the picture perfect student justly famous for two reasons.

First, he was incredibly good looking — a natural beauty. The second, he was the most boring good looking person on the planet. He lived in the school library, he routinely volunteered to tutor and his posture was always frustratingly perfect in class. He was a brick wall with girls, a brick wall with his friends and a brick wall to you. Everything he did was a calculated move towards his GPA, he was predictable and transparent.

He remained the star pupil of your school up until senior year, when out of nowhere Kim Taehyung did a 180 and became a mystery.

You were curious as to what might’ve caused the sudden change; the good boy suddenly going bad. He acted as though he had a grudge against the world, as though the world did something so shockingly inhumane that his actions and juvenile delinquency were warranted, but he just wanted to be himself. He just wanted to be able to express himself.

With his chestnut hair streaked with green, pink leather jacket and the cool that suddenly replaced his once stoic aura, Taehyung was a completely different person. And, you could tell from the size of the dark bags under his eyes and the hangovers he routinely nurtured in the classes he did actually attend, Taehyung was chasing demons into tequila sunrises.

He wasn’t any different from the group of boys he hung around. Which doesn’t come as a surprise to you, you are at the end of the day, the product of your environment. You just hoped that maybe, just maybe, he would be different and prove you wrong.

If only.

Walking to the student administration office determined and passionate. You decide that if Taehyung could change in such a short time frame than you could too. You didn’t want to follow the path your parents set out for you, and neither did he, you wanted to spread your wings, so you did.

You were going to find a university outside of the state and attend it. You were going to find what makes you happy and pursue it.

What makes you happy was 8 hours away and you needed to maintain an A- average to even think about getting in on scholarship. Brown was an elite college designed for hardworking students like yourself.

So thats what you worked towards. You had a goal and you were going to press forward and achieve it.

But as you became more determined and goal focused, Taehyung had loosened his grip on academic reality and began to lose himself in the swell of people and what they could offer him in terms of a good time. He was a freight train heading straight for you.  

For the last 6 months of your senior year, the science classroom had become your cave. Your last assignment for your high school career was research on soil and sunflowers, which is why you spent most of your time by the back window where you could see every corner of the school.

These flowers held your hope of going to Brown.

It was english class when Taehyung approached you for the first time. You assumed at first that maybe his college friends had told him about the so called “legendary tales” of your famous freshmen sister and he had come to check you out, but he seemed genuine in his disinterest and just wanted to borrow a pen.

The second time he approached you, it was to return it. He didn’t seem at all curious or even aware of who you were and he certainly didn’t ask you about your sister. The small interactions were nice, although you were mostly ignored, he filled you with fascination and enough day dreaming material for life.

Hell, the boy was cute.

The third time Taehyung approached you however, he had figured out who you were and he played it smart so you wouldn’t figure him out.

Carrying a box filled with his last science experiment, he stops to encourage himself before making his way to class.

“Okay, Taehyung just play it cool. You’re cool. She’s just a girl. Its just a girl.” he chants under his breath. “Get in there, get to know her. Get her to like you. Get invited to the party. Invite the boys. Don’t be nervous.”

Making his way to the class, he opens the sliding door of the classroom and his eyes immediately fall on your familiar frame leaning out the back window with your chin against your forearm, your knees on the seat of the stool and your hair plunging down the sides of your face.

Staring into the classroom he notes that you were the only thing motionless in the beehive of the classroom, and Taehyung felt somewhat transfixed by the calamity that he thought might be your nature. What he hoped might be your nature.

He had always found that you were quite peculiar and compelling, but not enough to think of you as anything other than a blur in the face of blurs. He was nervous because you seemed smart. Smart enough to catch onto his plan. Smart enough to see right through him, but the allure of what your friendship could offer him outweighed any potential consequence.

Sitting down in the stool beside you, he places the box to the right of him and leans his chin on his fist to stare up at you. He wanted to be methodical with his charms, but from where he sat, it looked like you were chasing the sun and he found it amusing how the sunflowers that sat beside you almost looked like they were doing the same. He decided to run in blind, jump into the deep end with his hands tied. He was just going to be a friend. Theres no harm in that right? holla that rhymed, rm eat ur <3 out

Leaning closer to you, he clears his throat, “Hey Y/N, I know this is kind of weird but I was thinking that maybe we could be friends. I-I know its really late into the year and we haven’t r-really talked before but there is no time like the present right? What do you say?” he stammers, peering curiously close to your face.

Waiting for you to turn and reply to his overwhelmingly generous offer, he leans closer in curiosity. He questions if maybe he’s mixed you up with someone else and thats the reason why you’re ignoring him. But he knows you, and he knows he’s smart enough to distinguish you from the other blurs.

He’s so close to you at this point that he can see every freckle, every blemish and every crack of skin on your lips. He’s not sure why he’s standing so close to you, but he wants to offer his strawberry lip balm. He also wants to brush his fingers against the long length of your lashes or play with the ends of your soft hair. He feels like you’d be a nice enough person to let him, but he decides against doing any of those, you’d probably find that strange.

Cocking his eyebrows at you, he leans his head back against the window sill. “Hey, Y/N.” he says, licking his lips.

Beside the mindless chatter from other students, the clock ticking above the classroom door fills the silence between you as he waits for your response. He’s about to clap in front of your face before a gust of wind blows your hair away from your face, sending the apple and strawberry scent of your shampoo wafting towards him. He closes his eyes in awe as he lets the gentle scent clog his brain. He hasn’t smelt something so lovely in his entire life.

Looking back towards you, he admires the way your hair cascades down the back of your uniformed blouse but in turn, notices the earphones in your ears. Blushing scarlet to the tips of his ears in embarrassment, he laughs loudly at his silly mistake. Sitting back down in the stool, he rests his chin on his fist again and grins, you weren’t ignoring him.

After measuring and watering the sunflowers, you place them on the window sill beside you. Sighing into the gentle breeze you flood your brain with last nights conversation.

Your sister was arranging a massive house party at your family home. Your parents agreed and no-one bothered to ask you. How fucking rude

Mia lived in a college dorm but wanted to use the family house, where she no longer lives, under the guise of graduation celebrations. Your parents - proud and hippie, decided it was the worlds greatest idea, calling it an opportunity to “network.”.

Network my ass, any excuse to party for her was an excuse to be an asshole. You couldn’t imagine the kind of damage that would ultimately occur to your home. You didn’t want to. The idea made you grimace.  

Taking a much needed deep breath, you slap your cheeks. Maybe listening to soft music will extinguish the fire you’re starting to feel grow embers in your heart.

Leaning out the window in half a daze, you put your earphones in and listen to the mellow tunes of Jim James - a favourite of yours.

Your ears are filled with the sound of rough hands and their tender love making abilities on the wooden fretboard of an acoustic guitar.

You wished wholeheartedly to be able to play guitar like that, to push people into a swell of thoughts as vigorous as he does to you. Maybe you should try learning this song Y/N, you can play, you might as well try. It can’t hurt.

The idea seemed to tug towards a favourable conclusion but before you could even continue on that train of thought, you’re being plucked from your daze and pulled back down to reality by a baritone laugh and the strong smell of cologne beside you.

Taking out your earphones, your about to tell the baritone laugher in close proximity to piss off but as you turn and face the stranger, you freeze in shock.

“Kim Taehyung.” you choke, embarrassingly swallowing the lump of anger you were about to gift his beautiful face. His cheeks were pink and his eyes looked like toe nail clippings in contrast to the impressive rectangle of teeth grinning at you; you couldn’t yell at such a face.  

“So now you finally notice me.” he laughs, shifting the box beside him further away. “I’ve been trying to get your attention but you’ve been ignoring me for the past 5 minutes. Anyways, what’ya listening to?” he asks, flicking the tips of his hair out from his brows.

Sitting back down in your stool, you wrap your earphones around your phone and place it beside you. “Why do you want to know?” you frown, unsure and suspicious.

“Well, you looked so lost in thought. If music made you do that, I want to listen to it too and maybe get lost with you.” he says, rubbing his sweaty palms together.

“Uhh…” you mutter, your mouth not quite connecting with your brain. It was strangely bizarre how THE Kim Taehyung was talking to you, but you were too tired and shocked to question it. “Jim James. His song Exploding takes me places. I just fall in love with it everytime I hear it.”

Unwrapping your earphones from around your phone, you slip an earphone into his ear. You watch his eyelashes flutter unexpectedly at the soothing melody before looking back up to your eyes with an unreadable expression. He sits and stares at you for the entirety of the song.

He must not have meant to stare because when the song ends, he realises he had been and he tears his eyes away from yours in embarrassment.

You sink back into your chair as you wrap your earphones around your phone again. You feel like you just made some weird connection with him, it was unnerving.

Maybe you should’ve questioned him at this point, but as he agrees with you and talks about the music that has a similar effect on him, you’re transfixed.

You like the way he talks and the way his eyes pierce into yours to see if you’re still listening and the way he licks his lips in thought. You like the way he talks about music, you can feel an unspoken passion as you listen to him speak. Almost like there was furnace behind his eyes and he wanted you to feel the heat.

It made you excited for him but confused as to why he was pouring out his deep seeded passion so fearlessly to you. You didn’t even know him.

You can tell by the way he has to forcefully stop himself from saying anything more that he really hasn’t talked to anyone else about this. It seems to surprise him how much he’s managed to tell you because he couldn’t bring himself to stop.

He couldn’t understand what was happening all of a sudden. He felt like out of all people who would understand him, it would be you and he didn’t even know you. He regrets not choosing to use his methodical charm, he’s going in blind and he has a sinking feeling that you aren’t just some girl.  

He was in love with the idea of making his own music and to have people like you fall in love with it. To fall in between the notes of his melodies and get lost, because he knew that sometimes in a town like theirs, people wanted to run away and he wanted his music to imbue a sense of passion. A sense of motivation to do it. He was happy and he wanted others to be happy too.

“Sorry, I do that. My mum says I talk too much and don’t give people the chance to talk.” he laughs, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly. “Are flowers your thing?” he asks genuinely.

Facing him, you grin. “Everyone thinks I’m obsessed with my sunflowers, they even call me the sunflower girl, but I just want them to grow well. They are my ticket out of here.” feeling a slither of a blush across your cheeks, you look over your plants with fondness. “I need to get out of this city. I want to get out of this city.”

“Whats in your box?” you ask, tearing your gaze from the flowers to his curious expression. You hoped changing the conversation would divert the tender subject. You really didn’t want to talk about being suffocated by small town people and their small town minds. You thought that it might offend him.

Taehyung doesn’t even know whats in the box. “Its a surprise,”  he says, fondling the edge of it. He doesn’t know whats in the box because its not actually his work. He paid a junior in the library to fix him a last minute research paper and evidence of the “work”.

He could’ve done it himself but he hadn’t actually attended a single science class that year and had no idea what the assignment was on. Not wanting her to know about that, he diverts the conversation, much like how she did before.

“Hey, lets not talk about science. I’d much rather talk about you. I want to get to know the sunflower girl.”  he eagerly admits, inching closer until his knees were touching yours.

Surprised by his flirtation, you move back in your seat, grab your sunflowers by their shared pot plant and hold them close to your chest.

You want to hide in a hole right now because the comment came out of nowhere and your body wasn’t ready and your cheeks are starting to heat up and you’re sure they are pink and shit.

“Why?” you cough. Is he flirting with me? Why would he be flirting with me? I’m not even that good looking…

“I just want to make friends with everyone before grad,” he laughs loudly, subduing your suddenly insecure thoughts. “And why not?” he grins, suddenly feeling confident with himself as he watches you shy behind the petals.

Leaning forward in his seat so his knees were touching yours again, he remembers his agenda and what he was supposed to be doing.

Not wanting to waste any more time, he strokes the sunflower petals hanging in front of your lips, he makes sure to accidentally stroke your cheek. He’s grinning at how perfect this moment is becoming, you sitting there with flustered pink cheeks, him with sudden unwavering confidence in his abilities to charm. It made his job easier and he felt less guilty doing it.

“Come on Y/N, lets put these in the experiment room and spend the rest of the class talking. I want to be good friends with you and we can talk more about the music you like! I feel like we have a similar taste,” He smiles, wrapping his arm around yours as he pulls you up and out of your seat. “So, what do you say? Yes?”

His excited chestnut eyes simmer down to crescent moons as he waits for an answer. You nod your head and mutter back with a small smile, repeating what he said earlier, “Why not.”

Taehyung pulls you closer to him as you both carry your experiments to the experiment room. He was giddy and excited, much like a child.

You can practically feel your heart swimming in your ears in response as you look up to Taehyung and his cheshire grin. You can’t help but wonder why he was trying so hard. What good would your friendship be to him.

You’re about to ask him when all of a sudden he moves his hand to the small of your back, gently prodding you through the door.  You hate how much of an impact the small gesture has on you, as your thoughts break and fall apart, filling your body with tiny flickers of electricity.

Its in that moment that you realise that you’re a goner. You don’t even need to dwell on it. Your body and your mind like Kim Taehyung.  

And looking down at your flustered expression, Taehyung realises right then and there that he’s got you hook, line and sinker.

You remember the exact moment Taehyung sent you a message when you got home. You were sitting opposite your sister as your parents showered her in loving attention for her potentially fake academic success.

You felt invisible whenever she came home and no matter how hard you tried to talk, you were the ignored younger sibling pining for attention and you hated it.

You stayed silent with your claws in at your end of the table on the basis that after the party, you would become the favourite. There was no way she could hold that down knowing her social circle and how crazy the party will definitely be.

Feeling an alert from your phone tucked into the pocket of your jeans, you stop playing with your peas and pull it out. The silence you had adopted at the table, turned into a series of gasps and muttering under your breath once you read the message.

“What you doing? p.s. its Taehyung.”

You don’t even question how he got your number before you reply back with a timid greeting, you were just thankful that he saved you from a boring ass dinner with your family.

You were practically glued to your phone messaging him that night. He was on a roll with the worst jokes you’d ever heard when your sister finally notices your lack of attention.

“Y/N, who are you texting?” she smirks suggestively, leaning behind you. “Is it a boy?”

“Its just this boy from school, we started talking today.” you grin, turning back to your phone. “He’s funny — thats why I’m smiling, we are just friends.”

Mia smiles at you and then to your parents knowingly. “I didn’t ask but thanks for clarifying. Whats your boyfriends name?” she laughs, lunging for the phone.

“He’s not my boyfriend!” you shriek, snatching your phone back. “Leave me alone.”

“Who is Taehyung?” she laughs, running after you. “I’ll find out! You can’t hide anything from me!”

She gives up chase when you lock your bedroom door behind you. You doubt, no, you hope that she won’t remember his name. Mia is the kind of girl to beat up boys that like you, she was so over protective that it hurt.

Sinking back into the paradise of your sheets, you fall back into an endless exchange with Taehyung.

You spend all weekend and till dawn hiding under your covers texting him. It was comforting to have someone to talk to on a similar wave length, you didn’t feel as alone.

You were surprised by how much you had learnt about him in two days and how easily he got you to open up.

He loved making music and acting, his parents decided to prolong the vacation they were on to a year and he hated how he didn’t have the nerve to talk to you earlier.

You both agreed that there was this strange understanding between you, potentially caused by how much in common you had with him, but something felt …strange.

You couldn’t put your finger on it. He seemed to have either mood swings or personality swings, it almost seemed like you were talking to two different people, but you didn’t question it. You put your faith in that maybe he was just tired.

Walking the back routes to school the following week, you notice a group of boys standing beside the back entrance. They were huddled into a circle, seemingly up to no good. They looked intimidating — cigarettes hanging from their fingers, serious and hard facial expressions, and they were listening to loud rap music. It was almost scary how unapproachable they looked and how much you suddenly wanted to run away without them seeing you.

Staying out of sight, you wondered if it was worth turning back and walking to the front entrance. You didn’t want any trouble and they looked exactly that.

Looking back up to the group again you notice the familiar silhouette of Kim Taehyung hiding in the corner of the group and immediately feel your heart ricochet against your ribs. He had wanted you to come find him when you got to school so he could introduce you to his friends, you didn’t think you’d be able to so quickly.

Slowly approaching the group, your confidence begins to waver. They looked like they were well into a serious conversation and you didn’t want to interrupt.

Stopping beside a tree, you grab your phone out to text him, but when your name is said in the centre of the group ahead, you stop.

“Dude no, Namjoon and I spent the entire weekend talking to her.” Taehyung groans, running his hands through his hair.

Jumping behind the tree, you press your back against the trunk. You weren’t sure if eavesdropping was entirely appropriate, but your instincts told you to stay and do exactly that.

“Its going to work! I heard that they were throwing it at her house. I just need to talk to her a bit more okay. Y/N is too easy, don’t even worry. She’ll invite me. And then I’ll get you guys invited, its a no brainer,” he yells, scraping his shoes against the concrete, “We get along, she’s actually kind of cool for a loner.”

“I just feel bad for her. We shouldn’t use people like this, its not kind.” his blonde haired friend mutters empathetically.

“Such is life. You gotta do what you gotta do Yoongi.” he groans, stamping out his cigarette. “Come on, we gotta get to class. Its the last week and Namjoon and I want to vandalise the math block.”

You stay behind your tree and watch them saunter through the gate into school. You were shaking with adrenaline and disbelief and anger. The heart that was creeping up your body at the sight of him, gyro dropped to the pits of your stomach and your blood boiled in rage.

You suddenly felt guilty, felt horrible and felt like he just violated your privacy. No, he did violate your privacy. Holding a hand over your chest, you struggle to exhale. The hurt lodged into your throat like a rock and you were afraid that your emotions would get the best of you and that you’d cry a river right then and there.

You had told him too much about yourself and the thought that someone who had an ulterior motive for your friendship knows what others don’t and shouldn’t know, made you want to curl into yourself and cry in frustration.

You just wanted to have one thing, one nice thing in your life and you wanted that to be him. You hoped that it would be him, but Taehyung was terrible and if life teaches you anything about misery, its that terrible comes in twos.

Opening the door to the experiment room, that afternoon, you gawk at the crowd of people around your flowers. “Why is everyone standing around my sunflowers?” you ask, your voice faint, suddenly wracked with nerves.

Either your project was stunningly beautiful or something was terribly wrong. You were almost too certain that it was the latter, your classmates were too competitive to care if you did well.

The group of people surrounding your work stare at you sympathetically before moving out of the way, creating a clearing for you to see the state of your plants.

Sucking in a sharp breath from the site of them, you drag your feet defeatedly closer and closer through the clearing, disbelief indisputably on your face.

Stroking one of the last remaining petals, you slump against the edge of the table when it breaks off between your fingers.

They had withered. The once vibrant yellow replaced by a dull brown.

The students surrounding you bowed and politely left, eager to leave the awkwardness of having to comfort a top student who had definitely screwed up the worlds easiest assignment. And in doing so, uncovered the experiment box that sat beside yours. 

“Ripening Bananas - Kim Taehyung”

“Y/N Y/N Y/N!” Taehyung yelps gleefully as he enters the room, passing the group of students. The sound of his happiness as he jumps in glee, burns a couple holes in your defence as you try your best to hold back your emotions as he approached you.

“Why didn’t you come and say hi to me?” he asks, playful bouts of disappointment sketched into every word. You don’t look at him but you can imagine his face contort with that cute little pout he does that seems to make everything naught.

Taking a deep breath, you move out of the view of the flowers, so Taehyung can see.

“Your flowers,” his eyes glisten with sympathy as he pulls you into an urgent, somewhat sincere hug. “I’m so sorry. You must be so upset.” he says into the crook of your neck, with the heat of his breath making you shiver against him as he rubs circles into your back.

You know he’s trying to be comforting or play the part of a comforting friend but you stand rigid against him. It’s taking all of your willpower not to wrap your hands around his neck and squeeze the air out of him.  

Pushing him away, you stare at him incredulously, suddenly filled with anger. “Your idea of a surprise was ripening bananas? Why did you put your box next to mine knowing my assignment was on flowers Taehyung? I even told you how much this assignment meant to me.”  

Wrapping his hand around your elbow, he murmurs lowly. “What are you talking about? What did I do?”

Shoving his hand away you point to his box. “What did you do? Taehyung, ripening bananas produce ethylene gas that causes disruption of life to flowers. You put your box right next to my flowers. You killed my flowers.”

“I didn’t know Y/N, believe-

“The assignment was on respiration, how did you not know that?”

“I-I didn’t know?” he stutters. “I definitely didn’t mean to do this, I know how much they meant to you. I would never try to hurt you.”  

“Are you lying to me right now?” you ask, stepping closer to him.

“I wouldn’t lie to you. I’m sorry, I didn’t know.” he yells, begging for forgiveness with his eyes.

“You wouldn’t lie to me? Thats hilarious. Save it Taehyung.” you say, holding your hand up. “Just don’t.”

Pushing passed him, he watches silently as you yourself process what just happened. You couldn’t even argue against your results, the assignment was designed to be autonomous and you were responsible for controlling the flowers environment.

You did enough research to pass but the state of your results couldn’t guarantee even a B. Your grade had dropped and so did any hope of leaving this place.

Holding the door handle, you take a deep breath. “It was nice talking to you and Namjoon over the weekend, but had you got your facts straight, you would’ve known that my sisters party is open house. And, I’m not easy. I was just being kind even if I am a loner..”

“How did you-

“It doesn’t matter how I know.” you interrupt. “Just don’t talk to me again.”

Taehyung jumps forward to grab your arm, making you turn and face him. “No, stop. That was nothing. I didn’t mean any of that. Why would I? We talked — I talked, I haven’t talked to anyone like that in years and I did with you! We, us, I liked it a lot and so did you. You can’t deny that, I know how you feel. ” he yells, holding onto your arm to prevent you from leaving. “I don’t know what it was or what we are and I admit I was being a douchebag, but do you really think I put in all that effort just to get an invite to a party?”

You could feel the tension hang in the air as if it were a tangible object and you could see his brain run miles behind his desperate eyes, it felt like he was saying he might’ve liked you. Wait, did he just admit that he did.

How ridiculous.

Was he doing it in some last ditch effort to seem innocent, like his actions were warranted? You couldn’t trust him. He still approached you with an ulterior motive, and knowing that he did, discounted most of the priceless rom com interactions you had replayed countlessly in your mind. You didn’t even want to look at him, you despised liars.

“Yes, yes I do Taehyung.” Shaking his arm off of yours. “Come to the party if you want, just don’t bother me again. I can’t believe I was so stupid to even maybe kind of like you. Did you have fun making fun of me behind my back while I poured my feelings, ambitions and insecurities over text to eyes that should’ve only been yours? Did you and Namjoon joke about them together? Did you even once consider how I would feel? Did you even consider me as a friend?”

“Y/N, it wasn’t like that.” he snaps. “At first it was, but things changed.”

“Yeah things changed my ass, you got caught out lying. Theres more to life than pleasing your friends and hurting strangers Taehyung.”

“Strangers?” he asks, his eyes filling with a flame you couldn’t recognise. “Is that what you think you are to me?”

“Oh, I’m not? You think a week of talking under false pretence makes you qualified to be more than that? Look, I’m done. I want to go home and cry over how stupid I am. For the first time in my entire life I felt excited over something as trivial as a morning message, I got butterflies and I felt nervous coming to school because I knew you’d talk to me again. After everything that I’ve been through, I thought that I’d throw caution into the wind and open my heart. What a mistake that was. You aren’t as nice as you think you are Kim Taehyung. And now I know that too.” you yell, finally fed up with this entire situation. He’s surprised by your tone of voice and his face pales and his lower lip quivers. He looks sad or hurt, you don’t know which but the image stays painted on the back of your eyelids when you give him one last once over before running down the hallway.

You kind of hoped Taehyung would chase after you to apologise, to say something, but Taehyung was afraid you’d maul him if he followed, so he didn’t.

He didn’t even say sorry.

Stopping in the empty school hallway, you promised yourself then and there that you would never fall in love or even in like with Kim Taehyung. You were nearly charmed, you were nearly romanced by it all too.

You were so stupid.

After the graduation ceremony, you walked to the hair salon and asked them to cut and dye your hair. Getting a shade lighter from your natural dark brown hair, you decide bangs could be cute and get that too. You donate all of your clothes to charity and you throw out every single piece of high school paper.

You felt better and you felt stronger.

Your first year of university was nice. You made lots of friends in the music department and put a lot of effort into your social life. You were opening your wings and becoming a social butterfly.

It felt nice. It felt right.

It was in the second semester when you realised that you attended the same university as Taehyung. He was in the acting department, so your classes were on opposite sides of the campus.

You thought he would be gracious enough to avoid you. You weren’t forgiving enough to a person who didn’t seem at all apologetic, even if he was young and stupid at the time.

You were stubborn.

He did try to talk to you when he noticed you sitting alone in the library or waiting in line at the cafe by uni for your usual vanilla chai latte. He couldn’t understand the campus craze about that love story and how the entire female student body would order it in some weird  romance fetish.

Standing three people behind you in the line, he watches you swipe your card into the eftpos machine and make small talk with the famous chestnut barista.

“I’m not a doctor or anything but these drinks are like tranquillisers and are so good for my dysfunctional sleeping patterns.” you grin, handing the machine back to him.

“It’s good to hear that I do more than just rope hearts in with those drinks. Hey, speaking of hearts, Mia was telling me the other day that she barely sees you. Spare me a favour and go see her? I want to be able to kiss my girlfriend without your sister barging through the door and ruining the mood. I love your sister but I love my girlfriend more.”

“Ew, okay. Thanks for telling that?” you raise your eyebrows as the other barista hands you your drink. “I still can’t believe how famous you and your girlfriend are. It disgusts me. Anyways, have a good day Hoseok.”

“Sounds like someones lonely. If you want a boyfriend, I have friends who are single. Just say the word,” he winks, making you blush. “You have a great day too Y/N, I’ll see you later.” he laughs, waving at you as you leave.  

Deciding against caffeine, Taehyung runs after you as you leave. This would be attempt number 7 at trying to talk to you. Rounding the corner of the cafe, he swears under his breath when he watches you pant as you get in your car and leave.

You ran. Again,.

Truth be told you saw him in the line as your waited for your drink. You felt his scolding gaze on your back the entire time and knew he would try and talk to you as you left, but running away from those situations before they could happen became your signature move.

Your relationship with him, without actually having any resemblance of a relationship, was tiring. Innocent glances from across lecture theatres or when he saw you at parties, curious glances in study groups and awkward tension if you were too close. The tiring part was avoiding him.

No-one could understand why you’d want to avoid him. He was good-looking, stylish and smart, but your friends helped you run away anyway. They kind of liked being affiliated with Taehyungs group of attractive friends, but found the tension between you and him too suffocating to bare. So out of respect for your friendship, they didn’t ask questions and they didn’t intervene.

Again, you were thankful.

Taehyung couldn’t hide it anymore. He was sick of your flat tyre attitude and your motivated agenda to always avoid him. He just wanted to be friends with you, so he could live comfortably. He wanted to apologise and move on, but you wouldn’t let him.

At the very end of your first year, and the beginning of summer school. You moved in with your sister. You couldn’t afford to live in the dorms anymore and you were glad you had her apartment to fall back on.

You couldn’t sleep and your neighbours were loud and everything was a clusterfuck of suck. Of course you knew your sister liked to throw parties and casual get togethers, you figured it would be a weekend only thing. Just so long as you got good sleep on the weekdays, you were happy.

What you didn’t know about the arrangement was how exclusive she had become with Taehyung and his friends.

True to form, on the day of your high school graduation, she found Taehyung and pulled him into an affectionate bear hug in pure unadultered joy. She couldn’t thank him enough and Taehyung seemed to marvel at the affection and felt less guilty. Atleast someone came out of the situation happy.

After meeting his friends and becoming fond of his older friend Jin, they attached themselves to her parasitically. They enjoyed the benefits of her friendship, while you eternally rolled your eyes. Had you known that Taehyung would almost always be in the same domain, you probably would’ve just found a job instead and stayed in the dorms.

But you didn’t. You weren’t going to let him dictate your life.

The casual drink ups she hosted meant late nights at the library or at a cafe, staying over at friends houses and doing everything you can to avoid him. It was practical and beneficial for your academics. You got lots of work completed before their deadlines and lots of guitar practice in between.

You were happy.

Sitting at his second year introductory lecture for his music paper, Taehyung flicks the freshly died red tips of his hair out from his face as he waits for the lecture to begin. “So boring.” he moans, shifting his body to comfortably mould into his seat.

Dropping his head onto the arm he had sprawled across his desk, he closes his drooping eyes. Usually he’d be concerned and worried over the absence of his desk partner, but he was so tired from the festive events of last night to even care. His thirst for alcohol was drying up and he found himself sober almost all of the time, in search for something that will make him feel even more alive.

You were still ignoring him and he was becoming increasingly aware of your presence and your stupid strawberry apple scented shampoo that drove him crazy. He didn’t want to but he couldn’t tear his eyes away from you whenever you were near.

At this point he had tried everything but talking to you to get your attention and he needed something that would make you stay long enough so he could.

He watched you run away like you were the plague a million times before he realised that it bothered him. Its not like he had dated you or thought of you as anything other than potential. Its just that it was weird and it didn’t feel right that you hated him so much.

They were just sunflowers.  

He mulled over how much he screwed up a potentially great friendship and was willing to work hard to gain your trust, to be friends again.

He wanted to listen to music with you or stand in cafe lines laughing with you. He wanted to study and have deep 3am conversations with you. He wanted you to pass by him with a smile and a wave like you did with everyone else. He just wanted you to be okay with him.

It was the simple things really that made him feel like he was a firework, burning up all on his own and all because of you.

The door to the lecture hall opens and bangs against the wall loudly but Taehyung doesn’t look up. Instead, he nuzzles into the crook of his elbow, feeling the lull of sleep slowly pull him into the void.

“I’m sorry I’m late. Oh, it hasn’t started? Oh thank the heavens,” you say, panting to the teaching assistant seated by the door. “My seat? Oh, next to the sleeping boy? Alright, thank-you. Sorry again.”

You rush down the aisles of desks to find the last vacant seat.

You had accidentally put your alarm on PM instead of AM and only had 10 minutes to run like hell to class. You weren’t able to apply make up or tame your wild wet hair in time. You looked like shit, but atleast you were well rested.

Placing your bag on top of the desk, you slink hurriedly into the chair beside him eager to get this class over and done with. Leaning back in your chair, you relax your breathing and fan your hot red face.

Pushing in your chair, you take out your notebook and pen, preparing to take any important notes. The movement ushers your sleeping desk partner awake and he groans at the displeasure.

Licking his lips, Taehyung sits up and looks at his rude desk parter with the intention of telling them to soften their movements so he can sleep a little longer. But he stiffens and the words die in his mouth when he realises who his desk partner is and then suddenly, Taehyung doesn’t think this class will be boring anymore.

“Y/N.” he smiles.

“What are you doing here?”

Opening the front door to an ocean of drunk college seniors wasn’t exactly what you had in mind on a Friday night. The plethora of sweaty bodies and the throbbing of bass music made it nearly impossible for you to enter the safety of your home.  

It was kind of intoxicating, the feel of it all. How the lights cascaded down in strobes of red and green, and how the crowd of dancers throbbed against the music, hungry to climb the peak of the beat. You were surrounded, completely surrounded by strangers in your own home.

Only God knows how many people have trashed your room now, have peed in your plants or have consummated drunken regrets in your bed.

But where was all the furniture? you thought. You were sure a lamp used to live by the door, and a couch against the far wall and you remembered family portraits hung everywhere, but everything was gone. The house was completely empty of your stuff.

Pushing through the brick walls of strangers, your eyes get pulled up from the ground by some magnetic force to Jins concerned chestnut orbs across the room.

Waving you over with a smile, you spot Mia beside him talking to her friends. You didn’t exactly hate her friends but because they practically lived in your house, you held them each accountable for every Friday night and every piece of broken furniture. This party was out of control though, there was no way in hell that Mia threw this on her own knowing the reputable harm they could suffer trying to find another rental apartment when they would eventually get evicted.

Anger built up in the pit of your stomach at the sight of her laughing, the infectious sound spreading to her friends. How could she laugh this off when the impeding homeless status loomed so high above your heads.And wasn’t there a TV there before?

Walking passed Jin, you shove Mia’s shoulder. “What is this? And where is all of our stuff?”

“At Taehyungs.” she slurs in response. “And guess what! No rent! So you don’t have to work at that cafe!” she yells happily, affectionally rubbing your face with her sweaty palm. She was drunk. Very drunk.

Shoving her hand away, you step forward in anger. “That doesn’t explain why you have a whole college of people in our house. If someone breaks a window, or a wall, we can’t afford to fix it.”

“Y/N, I tried. I really did.” Jin smiles apologetically, letting Mia lean on him.“Taehyung should be around if you want to talk with him. I’m sorry that this had to happen without you knowing.”

Poking the inside of your cheek with your tongue, you gape at him incredulously. “Jin, lets skip the bullshit apologies. Sorry didn’t stop you from drinking your gin or inviting your friends. And I have a working phone too you know.” Running your hands through your hair, you take another deep breath.

You can’t remember a time where you weren’t frustrated with these people. “Just look after her.” you spat, stepping away from the group and turning around in search for a drink or for something that could make you less annoyed at the world.

Spotting a chilli bin of alcohol leaning against the wall, you rush over and open the lid. Grabbing the first beer bottle your excruciatingly sober fingers could find, you twist the bottle cap off against your forearm and slowly bring it to your mouth. You weren’t sure if jumping into the cess pool of beer was a good idea, what was the rhyme, beer before grass your on your ass, grass before beer you’re in the clear?

You never understood what that exactly meant, were you supposed  to eat some sort of grass? Is that why guys like to drink beer outside? Either way, you planned to be on your ass blind drunk by 1, or in twenty minutes if you were lucky.  Hoping to be lucky, you scull the drink at full force and slam the bottle down on the table beside you. The alcohol swirled a cautious reminder of your lightweight status as you felt your stomach already detest the quick consumption.

“Holy shit, that was impressive.” a voice cheers beside you. Turning your face to acknowledge the person invading your silent rage, you almost immediately roll your eyes. The boy was leaning leisurely against the wall in ripped black skinny jeans and a white button up with a black leather jacket. And the boy was Kim Taehyung.

Suddenly feeling frustrated again, you bite your bottom lip. No amount of alcohol can iron out the wrinkles Taehyung makes in the sheets of your rage, even if he did look sexy as hell doing it.  

“Tough day?” he asks, taking a sip from his bottle. “You look like you want to kill someone.”

Narrowing your eyes at him, you scoff. “Just go away.”

“Maybe I will.” he frowns, dangling the bottle in front of your face. “Or maybe I won’t.”

The see-through bottle of vodka that hung loosely from his fingertips cried out an incessant need to be wasted and the more his crescent moon eyes burned holes into your skin, the more you wanted to rip the bottle from his stupid murderous hands and save yourself from having to converse with him.

You hated Taehyung and you were pretty sure Taehyung hated you back. You did spend a good year and a half completely ignoring him, so not without good reason.  

Knowing that though didn’t stop you from ripping the bottle from his slimy fingers and bringing it to your mouth. He already hated you, so theres no point in being nice really. “Y/N’s a bad girl hey?” he laughs, watching you practically inhale his alcohol.

Regretting your decision almost immediately, you close yours eyes against the strong burn of vodka. “You know Taehyung, I could say the same about you.” you choke, still feeling the burn of the vodka in your throat.

Taehyung relaxes against the wall in a silent fit of laughter. “That would’ve burned me had it not burnt you first.” he grins, tilting his face to study yours.  

“Why are you staring at me?” you ask, still grimacing from the vodka.

“I want you to smile at me. We are desk partners and you refuse to show me them pearly whites, how could I not want to see you smile,” he stammers, crossing his arms over his chest. “I want to hear your laugh too.”

You weren’t sure if it was the intimacy of his attention or the alcohol that was making you blush, either way, you wanted no part in it. “Bold demand from you Mr. Popular Kim Taehyung. Go away, you’re drunk.”

“I’m not drunk, I just —you never do and I want you too.” he says, stepping forward.

You groan loudly at his eagerness to trap you into a conversation. Putting your arms in the pocket of your jumper you yell over the music. “Well I would if you got the hint, or the hints for the past two years that I don’t actually like you.”

He laughs, stepping close to whisper in your ear. “We’re roommates now. Can’t we just forget high school and move on with our lives. Well, mainly you because I’m over it,” His breath sends a shudder down your spine as he adds in a low voice. “I’d really like to be friends with you.”

He was so close to your face that you could see the pores on his nose and how red and dilated his eyes were. It only made you grimace harder. “I can see right through you Taehyung. Hot guys like you only want one thing.”

“You think I’m hot?” he grins, winking at you suggestively.

Standing straighter you poke your finger into his chest, pushing him away from you. The room was already suffocating enough, closeness between you and him wasn’t exactly helping the anxiety you felt.

“Oh please, even you think you’re hot.” you grimace. “Don’t look at me like one of the girls you think you’re going to get. I refuse to like assholes like you.”

“What if I’m not like the others?” he asks, his eyes twinkling under the strobes of light. “You refuse to like me? We’ll see about that.” he grins, putting his sunglasses on and swiping another bottle of vodka from the chilli-bin. “Just want to mention that I feel blessed that you stopped ignoring me two months ago and everyday feels like a dream when you aren’t being the ice queen to me. How about we get out of here?”

“You can go and take all your five hundred people with you.” you grin, satisfied with your comeback. “Desk partners don’t ignore each other, especially when they have to actually do work together. You should count your blessings that I decided to be nicer to you.”

“I do everyday. Wait, is that half of a smile I see? Must be my lucky day. Come on, lets have some fun.” he beams, pushing off against the wall and pulling you within the crowd of people.

“Let me make myself clear Taehyung, this does not change how much I do not like you.” you frown and he mirrors your expression.

Pulling you harder towards him, he yells loudly over the music. “Thats good to know because I hate you too. Come on.”

Clinging to his extended hand, you watch his back get swallowed by the crowd. Had it not been for his hand holding yours tightly, you probably would’ve let go.

You have no idea where he’s taking you but in that very moment, you don’t care. Where the vodka goes, you go. The alcohol made you feel free and the idea of being around the campus hottie and notorious sunflower murderer, made you feel more alive than you cared to admit.

In your first year of university you had made some pretty horrible friend choices. They showed you a life outside of the books and inside the clubs - a boring adventure you had pretended to love so much that sometimes now, you crave it.

Taehyung tugs your hand and pulls you down the hallway, you hadn’t even realised you were holding your breath until he turns to ask if you are okay. You half smile and grab the second bottle out of his hands. Maintaining your eye contact with him, you take a drink.

“I am now.” you murmur, wiping your mouth with your arm. “Was this your idea of getting out of here?” you say, taking in the emptiness of the hallway outside your old bedroom door.

He laughs lowly. “You looked like you were going to have a panic attack or something back there. Thought you’d appreciate some air.”

You blink back his words. “Thats actually kind of thoughtful but I think I’ll be fine after a couple more drinks. Oh, and if I get drunk …stay away from me okay.”

He salutes you and opens your door. “Lets drink in here, its better than out there.” You nod and he clinks his bottle with yours. “We’re not stopping until these bottles are empty okay.”

“Sounds like a plan to me.” you yell, running into the room as he closes it behind you.

You swayed to the music as a rush suddenly filled your veins. Taehyung was laughing and drinking and swaying with you and the feeling of not being alone felt so addictive it felt almost right. Its not until the morning after where you fully understand the gravity of your choice of drunk company and why addiction is usually a bad thing.

The splitting headache that threatened to tear the hemispheres of your brain apart, held your drunk adventures with Taehyung captive and you weren’t sure if that was a good or a bad thing.  Looking down at your almost naked body, you can only assume that whatever happened between you and him wasn’t good.  

Why do I have no shirt on?

Sliding back into your jumper, you closely observe your skin. You didn’t have hickies or any other evidence of sex —good. You were alone — also good and the bedroom door was locked — amazing.

“Y/N, wake up please. Seriously oh my god, fucking wake up already!” Mia yells, pounding profusely on the bedroom door. “Y/N, we need to leave now!” she panics, kicking the door. Opening the door, your immediately pulled behind your sister and dragged out of the house.

Apparently you only had approximately twenty minutes to get out of the apartment before the police would be called and Mia had been frantically trying to unlock the door and get you out. Pushed into Mias car, you can only smile at the eighth forced eviction since living with her and how Mia’s party had completely trashed the house.

How someone managed to put chairs into the tree on the front porch, burn the grass into the shape of a giant dick and destroy the mailbox was beyond you.

Banging her head against the steering wheel again she laughs. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. That sleeze - our landlord, he came over two nights ago and ….I had this feeling but I ignored it. Probably shouldn’t have ignored it, I mean it could have been you instead.” she stops, banging her head again and resting it on the steering wheel. “I just didn’t want to think he would do it, you know. Or that anyone of his esteem would.”

“What are you talking about?” you murmured, placing your hand on her shoulder. “Mia whats happened?”

“I thought it was suspicious that our rent was so cheap. That dirty bastard tried to touch me —I let him in thinking that he was fixing a drainage leak and he cornered me in the lounge. I kept saying no and he wouldn’t listen. So I socked him in the nose like dad taught us.” she says, shaking her head against the steering wheel. “I’ve never seen a nose break so hard Y/N. I nearly felt sorry for him. ”

Mia raises her head, her eyes puffy and gloomy as she peers at you. “I’ve never seen a grown man run so fast. And then I called my friends looking for a place to stay and Taehyung offered his home.”

Placing her head back on the steering wheel, Mia sighs loudly. “We officially live with Kim Taehyung now. Isn’t life great.”  

You pat Mias back, “Well, we should probably go home then.”

Mia scoffs, gaping at you incredulously, “What no argument?”

“No point.” you murmur in reply. “I can understand now why you threw such a big party. I only regret not smashing a window.”

Mia laughs, starting the ignition and driving out of the driveway. “Y/N as your older sister I need to say that if a guy treats you like shit, you sock them so hard in the mouth that their mother will feel it and regret birthing such a creature. Okay?”

You nod in agreement and she rubs your shoulder. “I hope you don’t ever have to be put in a position where you feel like violence is warranted. Its scares me just thinking about it.”

Covering her hand on the steering wheel as she drives, you give it a comforting squeeze. “Everything is going to be okay, we’ve got each other. Lets just go to Taehyung’s, maybe report him and then forget about it.”

You and Mia nod in agreement and drive in silence to his house. He lived close to campus so his house wasn’t that far away from yours.

Mia had to triple check the address on the phone to him because the house he directed her to was the biggest and most lavish house on the block.  

You stayed outside to admire the urban architecture of the two story building as she raced inside. The house was huge and the front lawn was bigger. The inside was even more impressive. Mahogany wooden floors, cream walls and home decoration on every single wall. The lounge was comfortable. Dark grey carpet, light beige furniture and an automatic fire place as the centre piece. You could see yourself sitting in front of it reading a book. It was honestly the dream house from the Sims you never had the patience to build.

It was a little unbelievable how Taehyung was the only person living in this house, but it kind of made sense as to why he never goes home. To be on your own in this house would drive anyone crazy.

As instructed by Mia, Taehyung preferred if you had the room next to his and Mia have the upstairs bedroom. You couldn’t think of a particular reason why but you didn’t care enough to ask. After unpacking your belongings, you set your books on your nightstand and lay atop your new bed.

You hear the low hum of Taehyung singing through the wall and you bathe in the sound. He was a good singer and the jazz quality of his voice sent electricity through your body. Curling in on yourself, you press your ear against the wall and smile. The longer you listened the harder it felt like your heart was consuming itself.

“I wonder what he’s doing?” you whisper before being startled by your thoughts. Why you were wondering what he was doing? You hate him Y/N.

Do I? The question itself provokes a train of broken memories from the night before and you feel the constraints of your hangover letting go as you cover your mouth in shock or more so, in embarrassment.

Taehyung slips out of his ripped black jeans and covers his lower body with the empty chip bowl. “Stop staring at me, I’m shy.”

You laugh. “Oh please, you didn’t look shy when I caught that girl over the summer break giving you a blowjob in the recording studios at school.” Narrowing your eyes, you bring your index finger to your temple, “What was her name, Ellie?”

Taehyung drops the chip bowl and you watch it fall.

“Fine. You get this question wrong and your jumper and shirt come off. What is a group of bears called?”

“Taehyung! Are you serious? Who’s going to know that?” you whine, nearly falling over in the process.

“So you don’t know what a group of bears are called.” he snorts, throwing his hands in the air in success. “Clothes. Off. Now.” he snarls, leaning on the bedroom door for support.

Disappointed in the unfair game but too drunk to even second guess his ulterior motive, you groan.“You can’t laugh at my bra choice okay, had I known I would be taking my clothes off, I would’ve avoided you.”

“Yeah but you didn’t and we’re best friends now. So, don’t be mean.” he says, sliding down the door to sit on the ground.

Turning away to  rip off your jumper, you take your time with the buttons on your blouse. You weren’t wasted but you felt drunk enough to need the wall for support.

“Hurry up! We haven’t finished the game. I don’t like losing.” he moans, leaning his head against the wall again and closing his eyes.

Turning back around, you stumble to grab the bottle of vodka at your feet, but stop when you realise its empty. “Fucking hell Taehyung, can’t a girl be shy?” you sob, slowly sliding the blouse off.

“You aren’t a ..girl ..you are …um” he stammers, eyes glued to your chest.  “Those are nice.”

Feeling defensive, you cover your chest with your arms. “I don’t remember allowing commentary on my body. You’re too sober, drink.”

Taehyung smiles a cheeky grin. “I wanted to be a bit sober to remember.”

Running your hands across your stomach, you walk towards him. “You might as well since you are never going to see my body again.”

Leaning down to grab the bottle of alcohol sitting beside him, Taehyung pulls you down to his lap.

“Here.” he says, passing you the bottle. Taehyung watches you closely wrap your lips around the top of the bottle and pour the contents down your throat. He found it strangely erotic watching you drink, especially with how close you were and how nice your boobs looked at his angle.  

Pulling the bottle away from your mouth, you bring it to his mouth. “No stopping until they are empty remember! Drink.”

Holding the bottle to his mouth, he stares at you through slitted eyes and you innocently touch his biceps. “I didn’t think you’d be so muscular,” you admit sheepishly, trying to keep your eyes open. “I like your arms.”

He hiccups putting the bottle back down beside him, staring at you in confusion. “My arms?” you nod. “Your arms.”

Taehyung smiles down at you and wraps his arms around your waist, pulling you closer to his chest. “I like you when you’re drunk, you talk to me, you look at me, you touch me. Lets be drunk forever Y/N.” he sings, swaying you.

“Hey, stop swaying me. I’m not a baby.” you frown, poking your finger into his cheek.

Taehyung grabs your finger, his brows furrowed and eyes dark. “Can’t you be this affectionate when you’re sober?”

There was a sudden seriousness to his voice that made your heart shake as he wraps his hand around your finger, sending barbs of warmth down to your toes.

“With you?” you ask, looking into his eyes. You swear his eyes were black and bold before but now, the longer you looked, the more you saw melted caramel behind the alcohol shine. You’ve known him for years but right then and there, it felt like the first time you had ever actually looked at him.

“With me.” he says, rubbing circles into your lower back. “Just me.”

Bringing your hand up to cup his cheek, he closes his eyes and leans into your palm. The intimacy of the moment was more intoxicating than anything. The harder your heart raced against your ribs, the faster time seemed to slip away from you.

“With just you.” you murmur, running your thumb along the lines of his cupids bow to across his pink cheeks. His jaw slackened as you ran your thumb behind his ear and down his jaw to rest on his chin. His mouth was agape in wonder enjoying the pleasure of your touch and his gaze was pensive as he watched you explore his face.

Running his tongue over his lips, he watches your gaze drop to his mouth in curiosity and you watch as his lips shift to whisper your name.

“Y/N.”

You hum in response as you play with the hair on the back of his head, and slowly bring your slitted eyes to his.

“Y/N. I like you. I’m admitting it because I know you won’t remember. So Y/N, I like you and I have liked you since before I killed your sunflowers.”

Your hand stills in his hair and he goes rigid against you. For a long moment, he looks absolutely terrified of what you’re going to do next. But when you caress his cheeks with your hands, he softens into your embrace again and smiles.

You watch the edges of his mouth rise and your curiosity becomes the better of you. You wanted to know what he tasted like, what he felt like and if his kisses really did pull down stars like all the other girls said they did.

So you looked into his melted caramel eyes one last time before you leant forward and pressed your lips to his.

“Shit.” you scream, thrashing against the bedsheets. “Fuck Fuck Fuck. What have I done.”

Taehyung stops singing and almost immediately runs to your room. “Y/N, I heard you scream. Are you okay? Are you hurt?”

Looking up to meet his frazzled expression, your eyes fall to his lips and your heart begins to soar through your chest. The memory flickers through your brain like a movie, in complete disbelief that you remembered when you usually didn’t, in disbelief of his confession, in disbelief it actually happened and even more in disbelief that you wanted to do it again. Throwing your face back into the pillow, you sob into your pillows.

You kissed Kim Taehyung and you liked it.

If someone asked you to write a list of things you’re good at, you’d probably write, “I am a really good drinker.” and nothing else because you don’t remember anything in the morning enough to criticise yourself. You’re the worlds best drinker in your own right. If theres one thing you do know about drinking however, it’s that you should stop. Drinking makes you aware of how affectionately deprived you are and it bestows the confidence to be intimate with others.   The strangest part about this entire thing? Wine usually makes you black out. Beer makes you regret and vodka usually takes away your night for the rest of your life. Maybe it was fate or the perils of mixing your drinks because somehow you remembered this one, or well enough to know that you and Taehyung could never just be friends anymore.

“Are you alright?” he repeats, pulling you out of your dazed expression. You were okay before but now? Now you were mad. Standing up, you shakily slap him across his cheek. The loud stinging noise cuts through the eerie silence of your new residence and the red outline of your palm makes a home on his soft olive skin. “Get. Out,” you shout, shaking with the adrenaline coursing through your veins. “Right now.” He stares back in equal amounts of shock and equal amounts of confusion. “Wh-what was that for?” he stutters, cupping his cheek. Raising your eyebrows you yell, “What was that for?!” Pacing the room, you cover your face with your hands. You were beyond embarrassed and you were beyond upset that the context of his confession last night meant that it had happened before. You were angry. You were so angry that your first kiss had been while you were drunk and while you were with him. The little shread of intimacy that you don’t normally grace, had been with him.   Turning to him again, you push against his chest, pushing him towards the door. You needed to be alone, you needed to cry, you needed to do something that wasn’t around him. But as you push against him, he stands his ground and grabs your hands. Holding them above your head tightly with one hand, pulling you close to his face with the other. The red tips of his hair are touching your brows as you stand frozen, almost nose to nose, stunned by his sudden forcefulness. To be fair Y/N you did just slap him.   Searching his eyes as he was with yours, you silently beg that they weren’t memories and that they were just figments of your imagination, but the longer you stare back, the quicker your anger erodes down to confusion. Your words of discomfort were lodged in your throat and you were suddenly overcome with the desire to lean forward and see for yourself if they were memories or not. “Y/N,” he says, interrupting your train of thought, his tone of voice low and heavy. “Do you remember… do you remember anything from last night?” He stares at you with bold coffee coloured eyes as you flicker your gaze down to his lips and then back to his eyes. The tension was so palpable, so dense, that the idea of staying so close to him when he was expecting an answer you didn’t want to provide, especially after hitting him, suddenly felt like a noose as you struggled to breathe.

 You brush your nose against his when you pull away. Your hearts racing and your palms are sweating and you’re absolutely sure your blushing to the tips of your ears when you gape back at him. “Y/N,” He stands abruptly, grabbing your wrist again. “Do you remember us, yes or no?” “Us?” you ask, swallowing buckets of guilt as you gape at the violet artwork on his neck. I didn’t do that did I? “These aren’t from you,” he says, following your gaze. “It was a hard night.” Not wanting to ask why, you ask instead. “Do you remember anything from last night?” He avoids your eye contact at this question before shaking his head. Are we both playing coy?   

“I remember everything,” he glowers suddenly, leaning against the door. “The question I want to know, is how much you remember.” He was definitely not playing coy. “Y/N!” Mia yells from down the hallway. “Come to my room, I have some of your boxes!” You’ve never been more thankful for Mia than in this very moment. Grimacing at Taehyung, you skip passed him but not without being grabbed by him again. “This conversation isn’t over.” Shaking his arm off you smile, “I don’t remember anything from last night but you giving me vodka. The headache I’m nurturing is the product of thinking it was a good idea to drink with you.” You watch his eyebrows burrow at your obvious lie. “I think you’re lying.” he says, crossing his arms over his chest. “Why would I need to do that?”, you say confidently. You weren’t sure where all this confidence to speak up was coming from and its clear from his reaction that he wasn’t sure either.   Taehyung stands up straighter, removing his arms from his chest. Rubbing his neck he stutters, “W-Well o-okay the-then.” Turning from his suddenly embarrassed expression, you yell to Mia. “I’m having a shower first Mia!” shooting him one last glance, you hurriedly walk into the bathroom and slam the door behind you. Ripping off your clothes, you turn the shower on and jump underneath the stream of hot water. You suddenly felt prudent, afraid that the naivety of your nature was a trap for deceit, especially given Taehyung’s seemingly hidden manipulative side. So as you pour soap into the palm you slapped him with, you decide to erase the memory of last night and scrub away the reminder of your sinful behavior. If only water could carve away the thoughts that torment our minds. 

2 Months Later

“Y/N, get in this shower right now and pull your hair out of this goddamn drain.” Taehyung growls, his loud voice echoing against the bathroom tiles. “The water isn’t going down because of you!” It had been officially two months since you started living with Taehyung and things were going well. Ignoring his obsession with wanting you to see him naked, he was a harmless kitten with now freshly dyed brown hair. “Taehyung!” you yell back. “Gross. I’m not falling for that.” He doesn’t reply but you can hear his giggles muffled by what you think might be his hands. He has too much fun trying than succeeding. Living with him didn’t turn out to be such a bad idea. He respected your privacy enough to knock before barreling into your bedroom and although you were grumpy most of the time, it didn’t incite arguments with the surprisingly bubbly and protective man child.  He was immature, childish, playful and emotional, and he really loved to cuddle.

 It was nice not feeling alone. 



Since your bedrooms were separated by a thin wall, after a while, Taehyung began to knock on the wall before running to your room with his pillow. The first time he did, you were so frightened that you nearly punched him in the throat. The second time he did, you were too tired to say no and had consequently woken up with his hair in your mouth and his hands on places they shouldn’t. And by the third time, you were already in love with his scent and the way he rubbed your back to sleep. It was something your mother used to do and he was welcome in your room so long as he did. Setting up a wall knocking system, one knock meant hello, are you awake and three knocks were a warning, im coming over. Despite this, living with him had become a well nurtured secret. He would warn you when his friends would come over and you would stay at the library until they left. Since he was a well known colleague of yours and a student lusted over by many, he was afraid of unneeded conflict, he was afraid of what they might think. 

 You avoided each other at uni but still indulged in note passing and secret winks. The thought never crossed his mind that you actually owned a phone, he enjoyed the excitement of a secret too much. So beside the handful of Mia’s friends and a couple of his, you became a secret.  


“Alright class. I want you to open your minds, I don’t want some cheap 1-minute noodle kind of essays. I want authentic, different, tasteful ramyeon. Which is exactly why this essay is now a group report.” Mr. Jones yells enthusiastically, eliciting collective groans from his audience.   Waiting for the chatter and rage to simmer down, he paces behind the podium with his thumb and his index finger vice pinching his chin. His other hand furiously rubbed the purple and orange hideously checkered fabric on his stomach. You had noticed a little quirk about him, he would rub his stomach when he was bursting at the seems to yell something extraordinary or socially devastating. And from the pensive but sadistic expression he wore behind his glasses, it was the latter. “You’ll be in random groups of fours, your names are down here and yes, before you ask, I am Satan. Beside your name, feel free to sign your soul away so I know you attended the class. Oh and don’t have too much fun sharing your workload with your fellow inferno buddies. On that note, you are all free to roam your real hell. Class dismissed.” Sinking back down into your seat, you gather up your materials. You hadn’t been paying attention that entire lecture or for that fact, any of them. You were so tired all the time that you kind of just dozed off in his classes. He was too intelligent for you to keep up and you weren’t even sure what the class was on anymore.

Walking down the stairs, you hurriedly skim the papers content for your name and fell upon your group.

Claudia Smith Y/N Y/L/N
 Gabby Young 
Park Jimin

“There goes any prospect of a good grade,” you groan, smacking your forehead. Of all the people to get, you got your slacker friends. “Definitely not going to get any work done with this lot.” Taking a picture of the piece of paper, you send it to their Facebook accounts and in the process make a group chat. 


You
 Screw our lives, we got put into a group report together for Mr. Jones’ class.

Jimin 
 Oh thank god, someone smart

Gabby 
You don’t sound excited Y/N? That’s great news! :)

Claudia
 Its bcos she’s single Gabs, single people dnt get excited over anything.

You Dump your boyfriend and date me then

Claudia Ur funny. I’ve got class now, so we could meet up tomorrow morning? Get a head start?

Jimin 
 I’ll date you Y/N ;) My class is next door to yours, wait up and I’ll walk you to your next class bae

You I’ll punch you in the throat Jimin.

Jimin 
Sounds like a date to me baby ;) see you guys tomorrow!

Gabby
 Ew guys seriously ugh. Tomorrow sounds good :)

You Don’t call me baby. 
Library, 9am. See you then team.


“Y/N,” Jimin yells as you leave the room, his cheerful voice bouncing off every surface of the hallway. “Wait up.” “I’m coming!” he yelps as you slowly start walking away, his black hair bobbing in the wind as his little legs ran towards you. Jimin had a fascination with leather pants and showing off his toned thighs, he –much like Taehyung, loved the attention. And you, much like every other girl, loved giving it to him. Who wouldn’t. Stopping beside you he hooks his arm around yours. The action was completely normal for Jimin, he was loud and proud about his affection for you, no matter how uncomfortable it made you feel. “Y/N, you’ve got comp class right now in the Murphy block right?” he grins, pushing you towards that general direction. “Lets go then, don’t want my girlfriend being late to class.”   “I’m not going to ask how you know that Jimin but oh my god, don’t say that out loud because if people hear you, I will kill you.” You whisper, looking around before slapping his forearm. You had become friends with Jimin in your freshmen year. He had dropped his wallet and like the good natured person you were, you searched for him all over campus just to give it back. He admired your effort and had decided to reward you with his friendship, despite chagrin from others. Being close to guys that looked like Jimin meant the constant need to tell people you were just friends. It didn’t help that Jimin enjoyed being physically affectionate with you or that he was currently dragging you to class with a cheshire grin. The jealous stares, the malicious whispers, it didn’t cross his mind how it might affect you, he was just too happy being himself. Stopping outside the threshold of two hours of boredom with Taehyung, Jimin kisses you on the cheek and shoves your shoulders in the open classroom. You turn to wave goodbye but notice a familiar mischievous gleam in his chocolate eyes. Don’t do it Jimin, don’t you dare do it. Don’t you dare yell anything. You pray, as you turn and rush down the aisles to your seat. “Have a good day baby! Learn lots!” he shouts embarrassingly over the chatter of the classroom. I’m going to kill him. You stop rigid in the middle of the class with a frown before covering your face with your bag. You don’t need to look to know, you can feel their curious eyes burning holes into your body as the room erupts with laughter. Waiting for the class to die down, you sit up straight in your seat and set out your materials. You avoid looking anywhere but straight ahead when you can feel Taehyung’s piercing stare as he nudges you with his elbow. He sits there in silence before slipping a note onto your half of the desk, weary of prying eyes. “Are you and Jimin a thing?” You frown at the note and write back, 
“Whats it to you?” Slipping it on to his desk, you hear the sharp intake of breath before he rushingly scribbles. “What’s it to me? I’m closer to you than him! Are you trying to make me jealous?” You smile before replying, 
“Why would I need to go and do that?” You don’t reply to the other notes he leaves to instead focus on the lesson and after a couple angry huffs on his end, he gets the hint. You probably should tell him that you aren’t but the idea made you excited, you just loved enticing chaos. Why did it matter to him anyway, you’re a free bird! When class ends your about to ask him if he’s going straight home, but as soon as the class ends he shoots out of his seat and storms out. You don’t miss the angry look on his face as he sinks his head into his grey turtleneck sweater. You don’t miss how tightly he’s gripping his black leather bag over his shoulder and you don’t miss the way he doesn’t look back. Taehyung doesn’t come home that night but you hear him sneak in at half past 1. You hear him pant as he slips under his covers. You hear him turn over and over and over. You hear him thrash against his sheets, until you hear him perplex, “I don’t know what to do anymore.” You can almost see him burrowing his brows, rubbing his eyes and licking his lips Turning to face the wall, you hesitantly knock. If he doesn’t reply to you he hates you and you’ve screwed up, but if he does, he doesn’t hate you and you’re happy. He stops groaning and you can hear him shift closer to the wall. He knocks back after a couple minutes of silence and your heart fills with relief. Knocking back twice, you hear him muffle his giggles before he responds with three knocks. Short lived anger, okay. You laugh before knocking back but he doesn’t respond. The shifting of his sheets and the movement of his bed against the wall sound like he’s getting up, but after a couple minutes of nothing, you decide he’s probably just gone back to sleep instead. Rolling back on your side, you hear another knock, but on your door this time as Taehyung opens it and peeps his head through the crack. “Are you sleeping?” he whispers, leaning his head onto the door frame. “I can’t sleep.” Closing your eyes, you shift closer to the wall and lift up your blankets prodding him to join you and he smiles joyfully before shutting the door, rushing over and slipping under the covers. “If I was with Jimin, I wouldn’t let you do this.” You whisper as he wraps his arms around your waist. You feel the budding protest build in your throat as he pulls you close, but you swallow it down when he nudges himself comfortably against your chest. “You can’t just run away from me when you’re angry. I swear to anyone in the clouds Tae that when I do decide to date someone, you’d probably be the first to know.” Taking a deep breath, he rubs your back the way he knows you like. “Yeah, I know.”

 Sinking into his arms after a while, he shifts his head up to the crook of your neck. You were grateful, his hot laboured breaths were quickly defrosting your body. It had been one of the coldest months on record and you welcomed any warmth with open arms. You couldn’t sleep. It had been more than an hour since he came in and your brain just couldn’t relax. Your entire body was on edge, you were too excited and he was way too comfortable. Turning on your back, you subtly shift his body to the side of you, his head laying on your chest, his arms splattered on your abdomen. Selfishly hugging the warmth closer, you wrap your arms around his waist and watch the branches from the tree outside cast shadows on your beige curtains. The moonlight peeped through the cracks of the frost covered window, and you watch it stream light into your room. Following the streaks up to his face, you admire how it accentuates his jaw and the prettiness of his lips. The fluttering of his eyelashes grasp your attention and your eyes widen in surprise. He was still awake.   “Why are you awake?” you ask softly, running your hand through his hair. He doesn’t say anything or nudge closer like he usually does. He looks up to you instead and after a minute of exchanging weird looks, he shifts his body over yours to slowly kiss your cheek. His lips are hot and your cheeks are now undoubtedly hotter at the spontaneous intimacy. Laying his head next to yours, he whispers huskily into the shell of your ear before kissing it. “I don’t like it when Jimin kisses you.” You fight back the shudders creeping down your spine and the sudden calm air dissipates as your heart fights to stay neutral. You swear either the blood in your body has suddenly drained or Taehyung has rewired it and everything is flowing backwards. “Is that it?” you ask, avoiding his probing eyes. “You stayed up for that?”

Taehyung hovers over you again, trapping your head between his hands. The sexual tension sat uncomfortably in front of you, so tangible that you wanted to lean up and either kick it away or grab it. His hair tickled your forehead as he stared doe eyed and serious. “Yes.” he admits, “Jimin is my friend. You can’t date any of my friends.”

You laugh, “You’re friends with everyone Tae, thats hardly fair.” The butterflies in your lower stomach were stabbing holes as you watch his serious expression drip into his signature smile. Resting his head back down beside you, he smirks, “Exactly.” before falling happily back to sleep. The things he does to you.   Taehyung was a mastermind at making your heart confused and as you hold him close, you wonder if maybe he was doing it on purpose because you were slowly and painfully doing what you thought you would never; you were falling for him.   “Shit.”

They say that sometimes the eye of a hurricane is the safest place you can be. And as you watch time, opportunities, dreams and love zip all around you, you can’t help but feel a truth in the saying. And it scares you the most that a single movement could pull you out of comfort and rip you apart.

“What you thinking about?” you ask, nudging Taehyungs ribs. “Must be something serious from the look on your face.”

Taehyung groans loudly before throwing his head back against the couch pillows. “Nothing.” Crossing his arms over his chest, he stares up at the ceiling in complete concentration. Before heaving a sigh and whispering, “I don’t know what to do.”

You had been having these moments with him lately of complete utter silence. No words, no movement, just two people sitting side by side, thinking. The silence wasn’t always comfortable, sometimes it would feel eerie of emotion as if you could feel his feelings swirling in the air around you. He was so transparent to you now, that it almost felt strange to ask what was up, you could feel the tension hitting its peak and you knew he was going to confess.

“Well, just follow your heart then Taehyung.” you say, watching his tongue swipe over his bottom lip.  

Taehyung drops any semblance of happiness before turning to face you. “And what if my heart is telling me to kiss you right now?”

The words fall out of his mouth so recklessly and so unsurprisingly that you don’t blink when you stare back. You almost looked unimpressed, but the feeling seemed so indubitably mutual that you felt as though the moment he presses his lips onto yours, the tension that seemed to accumulate in the house and in your bones would immediately dissipate.

“So what if I let you?” you whisper.

But there is something so unreal about being comfortable and okay with watching but never really having. With seeing these opportunities and never really having the motivation to seek them out because you’re happy and because the happiness you feel right now is good enough. Maybe you were better off in the middle of a hurricane, maybe you just weren’t equipped to take risks, or maybe …you just didn’t have enough of a reason to consider leaving the safety of your comfort in search for a greater purpose -in search of a greater happiness.

“I-I like you,” he stammers, shyly staring at the ground as he scrapes his shoes against the pavement in a nervous feat to avoid your gaze. “I beat up Jimin because he knows that I like you and I swear Y/N, he gets off to my jealousy.”

The sun peeks through the clouds as you laugh and your cheeks redden at the combination of Taehyung’s stare and the heat of summer. You hated summer. You hated it with a passion. Why Taehyung dragged you out of the house to take a walk didn’t make sense to you until this very moment. You laugh. “Y/N. I like you. I’m admitting it because I know you won’t remember. So Y/N, I like you and I have liked you since before I killed your sunflowers,” you mock, watching his face pale in cold hard realisation before you erupt in laughter. “I know you do. You should see your face Tae.”

He grabs your elbow, his eyes serious and expecting, “Wait, so does that mean you like me back?”

It wasn’t strange to think and feel this way, but it was strange that you never actively threw yourself into the flames, into the whirlwind or into the waves of the “what if”. But, you are now, and these thoughts, the scattering of little myriad dreams throughout the fields that floated in your skull and coursed through your veins. Made you aware that maybe you aren’t as happy as you think you are. That you aren’t as okay as you think you might be with staying stagnant and watching “what ifs” fly by. You were becoming ambitious again and greedy for more, you had a sunflower heart, earnest and searching for something more.

“Taehyung!” you yell, banging on the wall. “I’m trying to study. Turn it down or I’m coming over.”

“What was that Y/N?” he yells back before turning the sound up.

Taking off your reading glasses, you pinch the bridge of your nose in frustration before slamming down your pen and running out of your room to his. He was doing everything possible to annoy you for attention and this was the limit, you were done and you were going to beat him up. Reaching for the door handle, Taehyung rips it open on the other side instead and you fall into his arms. Not as gracefully as one would imagine as you slowly start to slip down his chest.

Everything happens too quickly for you to say anything because as soon as you’re on your knees in front of him groaning at the loud music, he has turned the music off, shut the door and turned off the lights. Picking you up, he throws you onto his bed and covers your body with the blankets before planting himself chest-to-chest.

“What the fuck Taehyung? I’m studying,” you yell, hitting his chest and untangling yourself from the sheets. “Seriously?”

“You don’t need to study, you’ve got this. You’re a smart girl.” he laughs, snuggling closer to kitten kiss your nose. “I’m giving you 5 seconds to back up your truck and let me out of here.” You say, gritting your teeth in anger. He nudges himself against you humming in content and when you get up to move, he lifts his leg over you, caging you against his body. To say you aren’t just pissed off would be an understatement, you’re fuming. “Stay with me tonight?” he says, “Just stay here, no more study. You need sleep.” You stare at him in bitter silence as he flutters his eyes closed in triumph. Lifting a foot over his, you hook it around his hips until you push yourself up to straddle his waist. Taehyung tugs his bottom lip between his teeth and his hands rest on the exposed skin of your waist as he watches you with lust-filled pupils through toenail clipping eyelids. You wonder where he thinks this is going.

“Study is my number one priority Taehyung,” you confidently remark. “I don’t have time to screw around.”

“Screw around?” he laughs before suddenly bucking his hips underneath you and you are unable to stop yourself when the half “oomph” and the half moan rips through your lips when you feel more man underneath you than you want to.

He’s smirking knowingly when he bucks his hips again, making you fall flat against his chest. “What do you think you’re doing? I have an exam tomorrow morning.”

He smiles at you as you push yourself back up. “I’m helping you relax.” His grip on your waist was tight but not tight enough; you were a professional at running away.

Your eyebrows cress with the playful challenge as you roll your hips not once but twice, against his.

His eyes widen in surprise and cheeks flush, he wasn’t expecting you to actually play along, and his hands loosen their hold enough for you to push yourself off the bed and rush out of his room.

He surprisingly doesn’t bother you for the rest of the night, but you hear his moans bounce off the bathroom tiles as he showers away his problems, or problem.

And all you can do is laugh and thank the heavens that Taehyung didn’t ruin this final exam for you given his history with ruining final assessments.

You were standing on the state lines of an opportunity and a potentially great love story. You were standing in between him and the idea of chasing a dream. You couldn’t have both. You were standing before a crossroad, stuck between your heart and your future. And theres no where in your near future that would allow you to have both.

“Taehyung,” you pout, taking your shoes off and putting your slippers on. He had invited a couple friends over to watch a movie and from the looks on their faces, no, Taehyung hadn’t told them you lived together.

“Y/N,” Jimin gasps, dropping the bowl of popcorn. “What are you doing here? I thought you were at the library?”

You put your hands on your hips as you watch Taehyung scurry to avoid your eye contact. He still hadn’t told them that you lived together and your patience was wearing thin, you didn’t have a reason to stay so late at the library and Taehyung was making it difficult to lie. Rolling your eyes, you decide its time to tell, why get others to do things when you can get off your ass and do it yourself.

“We live to-

“Taehyung, why do you have so many girlie perfumes in your bathroom?” Ellie yells, interrupting you from the bathroom before walking passed you and slamming her body into the seat beside Taehyung’s. Whether she saw you or not is a mystery, but as you tell them that Taehyung invited you over and they believed you, you don’t miss the way she looks at you: p ointed and accusing.

Sitting on the other end of the couch, you take the opportunity when the others lean forward to stare bullets into his side profile. He must feel it because he turns to you, guilt and shame iron pressed to his face as Ellie tries to cuddle into his arm.

Nearing the end of the film, you roll your eyes at her, rest your head against the pillow and pretend to fall asleep.

“What a shit film,” Jimin snorts. “Hey Tae, I’m going to head off. I’ll wake Y/N up and see if she wants a lift.”

“No don’t!” Taehyung yells a little too quickly, ushering a sleepy Ellie off his arm. “She told me earlier that she’s crashing here on the couch. If you wake her up, I’ll have to deal with little miss grumpy for the rest of the night.”

“True, she can get monstrous sometimes.” Jimin laughs in agreeance. “Have fun with that.”

“You have no idea.” Taehyung whispers through gritted teeth. “I will.”

“Tae, can I stay over?” Ellie asks, her tone sultry and suggestive. You really hated this girl and not because you were jealous but because she seemed like a genuinely annoying person. You hoped that Taehyung would say no and kick her out, but you definitely did not expect his response.

“The couch is already taken.” he deadpans and you nearly snort laugh.

“No like,” she says, suddenly lowering her volume. “In your room.”

“That’s a bit selfish of you don’t you think? Then where would I sleep?”

You bite down on your tongue, afraid that the heaving of your chest from bottled laughter would give away the fact that you were very much awake and very much frustrated that she was still here.

“With me.” she laughs and the silence that suddenly fills the room, fills your body with unease.

“Gross, well that’s my queue to leave.” Jimin musters before literally running out the door. “Peace out fam.”  

“Ellie, no. What happened between us last year was weird and uncomfortable for me. And plus, if you paid any attention you would’ve noticed that I don’t actually like you and that I like the girl asleep on my couch. If there’s anyone sleeping in my room tonight, it’s her. So if you could leave-

“Taehyung,” she interrupts, shrieking in disbelief. “You like her? over me? What for? I mean look at me and I’m such a nice person, like I’m so sweet and shes-”

“Oh my god, leave already.” you interrupt, not wanting to hear another second of her crow-like whining. Shifting on the couch to sit beside Taehyung, she stares at you bewilderedly like you just stole her favourite toy. “You can leave now, unless you want to stand in the corner with a video camera and watch us-

“Fine!” she yells, “Fine, I’ll go. Fucking hell, if you see me in public Kim Taehyung, don’t even say hi. Just watch the finest ass you’ll ever see walk away.” “Why watch a good ass walk away when I can stare at hers making me a cup of tea, really Ellie just leave please.” She rolls her eyes before stomping away and  Taehyung hums contently as you both watch her leave. Turning to face him, he smiles at you before grabbing your cheeks, “Hey you, long time no see.” he whispers, his tone of voice over-dramatically affectionate.

“Hey you …you jerk,” you slap his hand away to grab him but he jumps off the sofa to run away. “When are you going to tell your friends that I live here?”

“When you tell me you like me too, then I will.” he yells, running around the dining room table as you chase him around the house.

No I love you or I like you’s had been exchanged in the year that had become your living situation, in the year that had become the fruitful exploration of your unlabelled relationship with him. As you entered your third year of college, although some part of you loved him and you knew that, the other part of you didn’t want to tell him that. Didn’t want him to know. Didn’t want to ruin it.

“Y/N, I can’t deal anymore. You must be so lonely.” Gabby says, rubbing your hand “comfortingly”.

“Well, I’m not.” you say, frowning into your textbook. “I’m fine, don’t worry about me. I’m happy.”

“Happy enough for this?” she says, pushing her laptop screen to your face. “I know that you wanted to go to Brown, this has your name written all over it girl.”

You sigh. “I’ve already read it but I don’t know.”

“What have you got to lose? You don’t have anything tying you down, it’s not like you have a boyfriend or a job.”

“True, but it’s just that  …It means that I’ll have to move over there and then stay there for what, nearly two years to graduate when I could do it here?” you sigh, running your fingers through your hair. You were getting irritated with her prodding and the constant questions and the constant need to reply. “I’m gonna go look for a newer version of this textbook. I’ll be right back.” you say, grabbing the book as you get up to leave.

Dumping the textbook into a nearby trolley, you hide in the back aisles of the library to simply enjoy the quiet solitude of studiers and readers. Silence was golden and therapeutic and all you needed for atleast a minute or two.

Walking around the aisle, you spot the familiar build of your housemate, hunched over a table reading over music scores. He looked frustrated, understandably so, it’s not everyday you’re forced into a kind-of successful campus punk band. You were jealous of him. That he had something he loved more than you and was actually talented enough to be good at it.

Sneaking up behind him, you snake your arms around his waist and sweetly kiss his cheek. He immediately slumps back into you with a single deep breath, his shoulders slumping into you. You always loved him in ripped skinny jeans, but the comfortable shorts and the grey NYU hoodie he adorned today, made you want to cuddle him and hide your face in the fabric.

“You okay?” you ask, rubbing his belly.

Stroking your hand, he closes his eyes. “I will be. Are you okay?” he asks.

Letting him go, you sit in the vacant seat in front of his and he slumps over his work again. “I will be.” you say.

“Hmmm, touchè.” he smiles before returning his gaze to his papers, his pensive concentration face re-appearing across his gentle features.

“Touche” you whisper, watching the boy you had hardly seen these past couple of weeks hunched over work in earnest. It was nice to see him so passionate about his work and you’re not going to lie and say that it didn’t ignite a desire to be the same; because it did. He totally did.

You had a decision to make and whichever one you chose, love and lust or adventure and life, you knew you would regret it anyway. You would be stuck thinking of what could’ve been or maybe, what should’ve been. You couldn’t have both.

If you didn’t chose life, you knew that your heart would have trouble letting go of the idea. The pain would become so indescribably difficult to handle that it would physically break you and you would break him. But, if you chose him, the captor of your thoughts, the man with the smile that lit a thousand lightbulbs but one, you wouldn’t be as happy and you knew that.

The answer was plainly obvious. It stood in front of you with a cheshire grin and a baritone laugh, but those didn’t belong to Taehyung. Your housemate and platonic bed sharer with a happy morning grin, and an obsession with cuddling and kitten kisses.

No, it wasn’t Taehyung.

Mr Jones yells loudly before slapping a pile of information folders on the table in front of the class. “Alright class, before I excuse you all. I need to mention that we still have spots for the exchange to Brown, in fact all of the seats. It’s the first time a community college has ever partnered up with an elite, so if you all are excited by the prospect of employment in this scarce and scary world, do yourself a favour and sign up before it’s too late. Class dismissed.”

Again, you sit back and watch the class filter out. The neglected folders sat gracefully taunting you, as their tantalising words of hope and adventure called out to you.

This was it.

And fuck it, you were going to do it.

Running your hands down your thighs, you watch Mr. Jones talk to a couple of students inquiring about exam results before slowly walking down the steps towards him. He notices your hesitance to approach and laughs at your shyness as the other students walk away.

“Our resident sleeper Y/N.” he snorts, crossing his arms over his chest. “What do I owe the pleasure?”

You frown at the nickname because you’ve never fallen asleep in his classes, before shaking your head and pushing the insult over your shoulder. You didn’t sleep in his classes, you didn’t even blink in fear of being a target for his relentless questioning, but considering you day dreamed in most of his lectures, you might as well have been.

“Sir, I-I want to-

“You want to sign up for the exchange?” he interrupts. Truth be told, he made you nervous. He was intimidating and his eccentric clothing made you uncomfortable. His satire humour colour co-ordinated with the devil music notes on his tie and the red t-shirt you were pretty sure was on backwards.

“Do I have an actual contender for this project!?” he yells excitedly before rushing over to the folders. Placing a folder into your open arms, he says. “Look, all you need to do is read this folder and if you decide it’s for you. Come back and sign it.”

Looking at the folder, you take a deep breath. You’ve thought about it enough and Fuck it. “Can I sign it now?”

“You want to actually do it?” he gasps, clapping his hands together. “Oh my Aunty Barbara, the dean is not going to believe this one. If you are serious about this Y/N, you can come with me now to her office and we can discuss your options. Since you’re unfortunately the only contender for this project, heaven forbid me for actually asking why my students don’t want employment, we could potentially solidify a scholarship for you.”

Without a single protest, you smile and nod your head in a frantic attempt to communicate your agreeance. He smiles down at you and prods you to follow. “That’s the spirit. Always knew you were a fighter. You’ve made a courageous decision, I commend that.”

You follow him through the busy hallways, hugging the folder close to your chest. Students bow politely to him as they pass, and you smile when you see Taehyung and his group of friends. Taehyung winks at you as he leans against the wall to check you out and you grin back, scuttling behind Mr. Jones.

Mr. Jones opens the deans door and ushers you in, and as you turn nervously to watch him close the door behind you, you start to slowly feel it rise over the rocky terrains in your mind and light all of your lightbulbs.

A passion,

and although the middle of a hurricane can be the safest place to be, you were happy that you were no longer watching things fly by, and amazed how confident you were grabbing the opportunity by its cuff and information folder before it does.

“How was class today? I saw you walking hand-in-hand with Mr. Jones today. You get in trouble or something?” Taehyung whispers against your shoulder.

You were watching a movie, blankets and pillows, chocolate and popcorn. Taehyung was beside you, content and happy with his fair share of the blanket and Mia was sitting on the floor painting her nails. She called it family night, you called it a nuisance.

“No. No I wasn’t in trouble. I just had to talk to him about something,” you say, slapping his thigh. “I’m too boring to get into trouble.”

“You can say that again,” Mia laughs, throwing a piece of popcorn in your hair. You turn to her and frown before watching the creases in her face even out. Placing the nail polish on the coffee table, she pauses the movie and faces you, eager but nervous.

“I have something to tell you guys. I’m moving in with Jin. We’ve decided to settle down.”

“What?” you yell. “What the f-

“Woohooo,” Taehyung giggles, lifting his head off your shoulder. “We can be alone now Y/N. You know what that means? No pants all day, everyday.”

“What about me?” you ask, ignoring Taehyung and frowning at her indecency to tell you sooner. She smiles at you before grabbing your hand, “You’ll be fine. You and me forever baby, just not under the same roof-

“Well that’s just perfect because I also have something to say.” you interrupt, wanted to one up her, suddenly bursting at the seems to tell them both that you were leaving.

“What is it?” Taehyung says, hooking his arm around yours. “Mmm?”

“I’m going to Brown,” you confess,“I got into the exchange programme there and I’m going this summer.”

You feel Taehyung stiffen against you before he pulls you to face him, “What?” he asks, his voice uncharacteristically quiet and gentle.

“I’m going to Brown. I’m leaving Taehyung.”  you say.

“Well that’s okay, you’ll be coming back when the semester finishes. Gosh, you nearly scared me there, I thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant. My testical nearly fell off.” he sighs in relief, relaxing back against you.

You take a deep breath because you know what you’re about to say will hurt him, you know it will break at least one of you and you know that as soon as you say it, everything changes from here on out, and you do it anyway.

“It won’t be months Tae. It will be years.”

And there was nothing he could say to make you stay, he wanted the best for you and the thought made him sad but the best wasn’t him, the best was a state away.

He slowly unhooks his arm from yours and leans back against the couch. Mia sits by your legs tapping your knee, seemingly perplexed but not enough to say anything. She knew that nothing she could say would ever make you change your mind.

And as the room drowns in an uncomfortable silence, the red wires in your heart become untangled and focused on the direction you were heading, but they just weren’t towards him and that was okay.  

{Shamelessly} Taehyung’s Point of View Conclusion

Pacing back in forth in the empty lecture theatre, I bite my bottom lip. Namjoon and I didn’t tell anyone what we were doing or where we were, in fear that we might just not be as good as we think we are. That we might not get in. After seeing you off, suitcase and all, and accepting that you were gone, my game plan was set in motion; we were going to get signed.

It hasn’t been the first time an entertainment company has decided to roll into my college looking for trainees, but it’s been the only one interesting enough to audition for, and for the first time in along time, I felt nervous for my future.

I worked hard for this though, endless nights leaked into annoying mornings at the library writing and memorizing music. I deserve this.

“The audition results should be up by now right? Where the fuck is Namjoon?”

Sitting in a seat, I sprawl my arm across the desk and look towards the sunlight peaking through the dark clouds. Snow had collected on the windows and the turbulent weather was beginning to drown the aisles of desks in an eerie darkness.

The room was frosty cold, but the giant beige lapel coat around me and the black scarf that smelt like her, kept my body warm.

I wonder if she’s warm.

I think about her too much to consider it normal. She was always there, her little smiles and her big frowns, the way she curled herself against my chest and the way she runs her fingers through my hair when she thinks I’m asleep.

But she’s gone now and I need to stop torturing myself.

She was who I imagined singing to in that audition room. The intimidating group of judges sitting in the audience were replaced by her radiant supportive smile as I sang my feelings out.  

She made my home something I wanted to come back to.

And I didn’t want to go home anymore.

“Taehyung!” Namjoon yells, barreling through the doors. He didn’t need to say it, his smile said it all. “WE MADE IT!” he screams, pulling you into a hug. “We both made it!”

“I need to call my mum, she’s going to freak out!” he laughs, pulling away. “Who you going to call first?” he asks as he scrolls through his phone.

Pulling out my phone, I scroll through my list of contacts to find yours, but my finger hovers over the call button as I stare at your contact ID a second too long and I don’t.

I had forgotten to change your contact picture and it was a picture of you curled up in blankets sitting by the fireplace reading a book. If you knew I took that picture, you’d probably kill me. It was the little things like this that I loved so much. I wanted to keep these moments to myself because the thought of Jimin or anyone else ever seeing the side of you that I admired so much, made me jealous and made me feel so possessive that I didn’t tell anyone about you or that I nearly didn’t attend this audition with Namjoon because I knew that it meant I would have to leave you one day.

But you left me first and that’s okay.

I liked a girl who was always looking in the other direction, like a sunflower chasing the sun. I tried to believe that she wasn’t looking at me because she was out of my league, I tried I did, but my heart knew that it wasn’t because I’m not the light she wants, it’s because I’m not the light she needs.

And more importantly, I suppose it’s because we just weren’t meant to be together, maybe in the future sure, but now? no. The timing was horrible, so unequivocally horrible, but I hold hope that one day if we meet as different people I will have the courage to tell her how I really feel and then maybe,

just maybe, I’ll be the sun that she wants and I will be the sun that she needs.  

Epilogue

“Y/N, it was lovely catching up with you again. You’ve blossomed into such a lovely woman!” Jimin says, loosening his suit tie. Jimin was a corporate soldier of an entertainment company now and had spent the afternoon filling you in on the happenings around town since you moved away. You admittedly struggled to keep his close friendship, but his friendship you kept nonetheless. You were back for good and Jimin was happy to welcome you back so long as you paid for lunch. “Oh yeah, have you seen Taehyung lately? I heard he’s back around too.”

You smile.

“Not yet.” you say, lifting your wrist to check the time. “Soon though.”

“You know, we all knew you two were a thing in college. Just didn’t think it would’ve ended up the way that it did but I’m proud you two followed your dreams. I can’t wait to meet your boyfriend though, he sounds like a catch.”

You laugh.

“Thanks Jimin, it means a lot to hear that from you.” you say, watching him walk backwards towards his car. “My boyfriend isn’t that much of a catch, he’s very annoying and not as cool as you.”

“You’re probably right! Hey we need to get together for like a college reunion or something. Minus Mia and Jin of course, I can’t get over how fat your sister is. How do twins…” he gestures towards your stomach. “Fit in there?”

“How does a brain…” Pointing up to his head you joke. “Fit in there?”

He laughs loudly before smacking your hand away. “It’s been five years and you’re still so cold to me. Aish, somethings never change.”  

“Maybe you’re right but my heart has definitely turned over, I’m just really glad I left, but I’m back now so expect my relentless insults. It’s the only way I can communicate my love for you in a way that won’t upset my boyfriend.”

“That’s fine with me Y/N. I’ll text you later.” he says, smiling his million dollar smile.

“You’re always welcome in my home Jimin, so if you ever need a place to crash, you know my number.” is all you say before he waves goodbye excitingly with his briefcase and getting into his company car and driving away. You watch the red lights of his car fade into the distance.

Everything felt right.

Every light bulb was on.

Everything was where it was supposed to be.

Punching in your apartment code, you take off your heels and put on your slippers. “Hmmm, what’s the amazing smell hun?” you ask, putting your handbag on the vanity by the door.

He runs around the kitchen island with a cheshire grin and a baritone laugh. The sweet sound of happiness and coming home to it made your heart sing, made your heart race and made your heart ..flip because that’s not a nice smell to come home to no matter how hard he tried to woo you.

“I burnt the potatoes, but I ordered pizza, extra pineapple on yours too, so we should be fine for dinner.” he smiles, wrapping his arms around your waist to welcome you home.

“Oh thank god.” You smile, wrapping your arms around his neck. Leaning on your tippy toes, you give him a quick kiss on the lips before muttering, “But did you turn the potatoes off?”

He looks down at you with a vacant expression and you look up at him expectantly. Surely he remembered to turn them off, surely. The smoke alarms go off before he gets to explain that no, he completely forgot and just ordered pizza instead.

You laugh again before swatting him away to turn the smoke alarm and stove top off. Opening the lounge windows to let smoke out, you admire the sun as it descends behind the hills, nothing was more beautiful.

“Y/N.” he whines standing behind you. “What are you looking at?”

Turning to face him, you lean against the window sill and grin. You lied, nothing was more beautiful than him. “Nothing, just the sunset.”

He stands closer and kisses your forehead before turning you to face the sunset again, “Of course you were, my sunflower girl.”

You loved him. You loved Kim Taehyung.

So the idea of this fic spawned from the idea that sunflowers chase the sun -obviously. I liked the idea that sunflowers grow inside of us, we all have sunflower hearts; ambitious and greedy, and although this was a fluff series, I didn’t want Y/N to end up with Taehyung. Mainly because she worked so hard and ending up settling with second best, I didn’t want that for her, I wanted her to become comfortable with the idea that sometimes you need to feel like shit, sometimes things are supposed to fall through, sometimes we are supposed to love the people we do just to become the people we are destined to be or go. And more importantly, that there is more to life than a relationship. Happiness comes from you first before you can find it in other people, so maybe in another life or in the future, they will find happiness in each other as well.

[bishiglomper]

Who wants to learn about my family drama? Too bad I'm gonna post about it anyway.

So mom got pregnant at 16. Married the guy. He went into the military. I came along 8 years after my sister. It was all fine and good I guess until he came home from a deployment when i was... 12 maybe.

I bring this up because i took a 3 hour roadtrip alone with dad's wife. She spilled all sorts of beans..

So anyway. That was at least his 2nd or 3rd deployment and i guess he sent mom 70k. When he came home, there was no money. No one ever figured out where it went. Figured mom spent it. We have no idea on what. Looking back I can't think of anything she could have spent it on. I dont remember her leaving for secret trips or anything. No new items. No strangers coming around. Its a mystery.

So shit didnt really start take a turn for the worse until we moved to Ohio when I was around 14. Dad had another deployment, but this time he acquired PTSD. I never questioned why, i just figured war was obviously bound to leave you fucked up.

Dad's wife told me differently. I had to twist her arm just to give me vague cryptic keywords. Like "murder" "people who ought not be murdered" and "practically coerced him into being involved" 😳

My poor daddy. No wonder he ended up locked in his room with a swat team surrounding the house.. Until mom donkey-kicked the door in to get to him and take his gun. He witnessed some fucked up shit, even though I'm not quite sure what.

But the real juicy bit is something i didnt even know about until my late 20s. Sissy told me while we were in Ohio, my parents were involved in swinging. Knew no details other than thats where a couple of their friends came from.

The new light she'd on this topic though, was it was mom's idea. I always figured it was dad. But apparently he only did it for mom.

(His now-wife is named Stacy. I love her but i just cant call her stepmom.)

Sje said she researched the topic, and typically swingers are middle-aged couoles who married too young. (So, typical case)

Anyway. I guess mom gradually started breaking rules. Like getting permission from dad first. And she snuck around during his next deployment..

During this time, we jad a daughter of familt friends staying with us. I was only 14 but i knew this woman was trouble. She was the type who could and would totally kick your ass if you pissed her off. Questionable choices. Wild child. All that shit. But she was good to us, so.

Anyway. My niece has brought back stories from her bio-dad's side of the family. One of which being that one time whilst mom and our guest were at a bar, mom tried to get into (bio-dad's family member's pants)

I always thought wow, never knew mom couod/would do that; crazy..

But Stacy filled in some swinger drama from that time and it all fits.

(Took a break from posting to actually discuss and compare notes with my sister)

The only discrepancy is sister is adamant that this WAS dad's idea to swing.

So anyway.

The next bit of drama was my sister having the niece. We all went to Iowa because we spent summers with the aunt and everyone.

At this point we were already planning on the move to Iowa that winter.

So dad, being fed up with my 23yr old sister who was a slob, refused to get a job and support her child.. He's just like "so you can either stay here and I'll send your shit or you can come back for your shit and gtfo"

He sent her stuff. But because she had a child that half belonged to someone else and essentially moved several states away, he sued. Thankfully dad helped with the lawyer and while not perfect, my sister got the best possible deal for the situation.

But all through this, dad absolutely loved his granddaughter. And it was an asshole move, but dad only agreed to support my sister and let her stay with us if he got to name her daughter. He picked Dominatrice. (Doh-min-ah-treece) Because you can get Trixie out of it. We were all like Wtf but ok.

So the last biggest drama was the events that led to dad ghosting my niece.

So one thing that happened was dad wanted to take little niecey out to lunch. She was 5ish. Sister couldnt get work off though, but hes all "its fine, I'll just pick her up and drop her back off"

But sissy was able to leave and met them. But as soon as she did he's like "you know what, im actually gonna go ahead and take off"

Which created a slurry of suspicious thought like "wtf is going on, did i foil plans to whisk my daughter back with them?"

When sissy told me this, I figured it was either just a weird mix of coincidence that set off alarm bells or weird timing. Or both. I'm 100% confident dad didnt plan anything. What was he going to do with her? Its not like he'd be able to kidnap her and go off grid never to be found again. Also was he going to just raise her? None of that makes sense.

Anyway. The big blowout didnt happen until dad was on his way back to virginia and the niece was due to be picked up from ohio. He offered to pick her up along the way and we were supposed to go up after them and spend vacatipn with them.

Sister told him no, he couldn't do that. He asked why. She tried to avoid answering him, but eventually told him that it was in the court order that he not be left alone with the child. Probably because he CAUSED the whole custody fiasco.

But this was the first he'd heard of it. So he was understandably upset. And then he tried hounding her for answers, for proof. Send him the document stating this. It escalated until he would jusy be yelling and svreaming over the phone and make sissy cry until mom had to shut down the phone calls.

I asked my sister why she didn't just show him the proof. Like, thats all he wanted.

She said it was not her job to prove it to him. It was public record, he could do it him damn self.

Stacy told me he tried, but couldn't get it because niece was a minor.

When I told Sissy this, she gave me the SNOTTIEST facial expression which i think meant "well, shit." Mixed with a mocking sort of "he's still a whiny-piss-baby"

So yeah. We're only visiting because after like 9 years dad reached out after forcibly pushing all this anger and feels down in effort to reconcile. Sissy is attempting to but at the same time feels he's too toxic to bother with and doesnt want him near her kids.

All because after this went down, he then ghosted the niece. He used to call her and send her gifts all the time. Her little heart was absolutely broken when he started ignoring her. Stacy told hom not to do that, so the general consensus was that it was indeed a dick move.

His reasoning though was "my daughter thinks i want to kidnap my grandchild, how can i reach out and have a relationship with her without incriminating myself?"

So yeah. Stacy and I are very alike in the fact that we both are able to see both sides of an argument. I'm glad i got to see the other side because apparently dad told her (about the dicorce and everything) "they'll figure out what happened and realize its not all my fault"

Like, uh. No? How were we supposed to reach that conclusion? And i dont know about my sister, but i was a self-absorbed naive teenager, I wasnt aware of jack shit. 😂

And that is the story of the day. :D

In other news, I wrote this while dad finally got his gallbladder surgery and we worried he'd either bleed out or have a heart complication and die. Aaaand he was out in like an hour and a half. So far he's good. Now we can visit the aquarium without stewing in anxiety. Hooray!