#she saved my life and keeps me pushin every day (real)

[urmomsfavelesbian]

🧡happy birthday to her🖤

[brooklynislandgirl]

Name: "Edward Charles Allan Brock. Most people call me Eddie. Most people don't even know I got two middle names. An' only one person in the whole universe calls me Ekkie. Takin' bets right now on who that could be."

Age: "I'm, uhm... somewhere north'uh thirty. Maybe pushin' forty. Maybe just the slightest shade over it. That's not too old, right...?"

Do you like to cuddle?: "When it's someone I care about, hell yes. We oughta be promotin' physical contact more, y'know? Keeps us connected."

Can we make-out?: "I'm pretty much always down for that. But it happens only when you're ready. Not a single second before, an' not an instant longer than you wanna."

A night in or dinner out?: "If I'm honest? I like a nice night in. It can be small, intimate, a 'just us' kinda deal, where we can make googly eyes at each other an' say whatever comes to mind, not gotta worry about what anyone else sees or hears. Also, 'dinner out' has sort of a specific connotation for... Us. Means gettin' dressed up, one way or another. ... Hang on, why're you grinnin' like that? What'd I say?"

Whip cream or chocolate syrup?: "Hey, don't get me wrong, whipped cream tastes good an' all, but--" "This is not even a question. It is a matter of life and death. You do not wish Me to starve, do you?" "Okay, chill out."

Chocolates and roses?: "Think we've already established it, but when there's a Klyntar around, it's a 'hell yeah' on the chocolate. An' as for roses, I mean... I'm not really so much for flowers most'uh the time, but I gotta say, I'm lookin' right at the rose for me."

What makes you a good Valentine?: "Guess we could consider the source. Taken my share'uh beatdowns. Got my whole life stomped into the ground, really, for actin' out how people in charge never wanted me to. Maybe some'uh the stuff I've done was wrong, but I really try to do the right thing, an' I'm never gonna stop tryin' to do right by the person that saved me."

Would you cook for me?: "Point me in the general direction'uh your kitchen an' you'll see what I can whip together."

Would you let me cook for you?: "Let's be real, here, babe, you wouldn't let you cook for me. S'okay. Nobody's perfect at everything."

Where would you take me on a date?: "Clarion Alley, over in the Mission district. Artwork's incredible. Not enough words in the dictionary to describe the feelings you get when you see it. An' then, some Smitten Ice Cream. Get you a scoop'uh cherry, with sprinkles on it."

Who’s paying?: "Well... technically, it'd be you, wouldn't it? You did kinda pick up a bum on a bench."

What did you get me for Valentine’s Day?: "Yeah... so... you probably got like a dozen'uh these stashed somewhere, but, y'know, you find this in black an' you think, 'Maybe she'll think'uh Us when she looks in the jewelry cabinet an' sees it...' " An extended hand opens, revealing a hematite pendant in a very familiar shape, strung upon a simple black cord.

"T'be honest, if I had all the money in the world, still feels like there's nothin' I could buy equal to the task'uh lettin' you know just how much you mean to me. I'm the happiest man in the world just to get to see you smile. I'm glad I made the cut."

Better Together || -

The quiz had been tagged to her on her Adventures of A Nurse Shark blog. She'd mulled it over for a few days. No one could blame her for ignoring it outright; Valentine's Day has always been antithetical to every belief she's ever had about love and joy and trying to show the people she cares about just how much she does. But Eddie sees it the day before and over her shoulder he reads the questions. A kiss to her temple precedes him pouring her a cup of coffee. He returns to the kitchen and is gone for a few minutes before returning to the breakfast nook. The day is too wet and chilly to enjoy breakfast on the terrace and will be for another month or two. He slings himself into the booth next to her and she watches as he assumes what she sometimes thinks of as Interview Face. And with almost perfect recall he launches into answering each of questions. She will always be impressed with his way with words, maybe even to the point of envy. She also really likes his full name. It rings with something traditional, something that speaks to a nostalgic romance novel, in which he could very much be a rake of the Ton. Only Elikapeka Ailine Alohaekaunei Kahanuola'Ilikea'wahine Riley doesn't exactly fit in with that daydream, so she'll stick with what they have here. Hearing himself say Ekkie makes her blush. "Is fine. Gonna be t'irty-five come June, so we're of an age. An' I happen f' like a slightly older man." She winks, hopes he takes that playfully. She nods when he talks about cuddling, he knows her well enough now that she doesn't feel the need to explain touch. The making out part though? A slight feeling of discomfort that she can't put her finger on. "Dat's very noble, an' I mean…believin' li'dat certainly got you a long way wi' me…but you know it's two way avenue, right? I…nevah mind, go on." Eddie is a master, too, of subject change without making it feel like something awful to guilt herself over. "I happen to enjoy you in a suit…an' when Beloved makes himself manifest. Bo'd are dey own kind of sexy. And I would nevah starve you, Beloved. But point taken. Whip cream and chocolate syrup." Her smile carries through on the chocolate follow-through, and Beth would be a liar if she said she didn't like the Ghirardelli toasted coconut dark chocolate bar, and the dark chocolate raspberry squares. Of all the places Beloved could have found Himself with Eddie? San Francisco is a good choice. The mood turns a little more sombre when he turns his gaze inward. She hates that all of that is true as far as she knows. Comparatively, Eddie's ups and downs are worse and wide-spread than her own, and she doesn't have a leg to stand on when it comes to complaints. She could argue with him until she's blue in the face that he is a good man, and his missteps aren't really indicative of his personal character. "Dis isn't…I don' evah wan you t' feel like…you owe me anyt'ing. Dat wha' we have is base on what you do for me…I dunno how t' explain. But if I evah make you feel like you owe me anyt'ing, jus' tell me." There's a momentary pause and she fills it internally of an inventory to see if she ever took him for granted, or made him feel like their relationship was conditional. The fear of doing so tightens her belly. Outwardly she fiddles with the rim of her coffee cup before taking a sip of it. Eddie cooks for her because he seems to enjoy it and she's adequately explained that she doesn't because she doesn't need to burn down the house, or poison Them. What she's never had to do was explain the why, though with her prescriptions in the medicine cabinet she doesn't think she would have to lay it all out. Something he confirms a breath later and she chuckles about it. The date though? "Sounds wonderful, an' really very t'oughtful. I'd love t' go out wi' you." {{part the second}}

[janiedean]

HELLO ANON, I’m delighted you wanna participate in my week-long springsteen birthday party celebrations!!! and since you took care to leave me such a long, well-put, thought out message that I’m sure you thought I couldn’t wait to read, I decided to talk to you about a truly absolute classic and if you don’t know it I even picked for you one version where he’s hot as hell, isn’t it darling? ;) so, without further ado...

badlands is the opening act of bruce’s fourth (and most likely turning point) record darkness on the edge of town from 1978. it’s one of his truly most known classics, a hell of a concert opener/piece (believe me, I’ve tried it seven times and it was always a mystical experience, you should too!!) and a perfect summary of... pretty much all of his favorite themes. sounds good? believe me, if you ain’t experienced badlands in your life you’re missing something. ;) now, shall we go through the lyrics? (ps: really, listen to it while you read my explanation or you won’t get the full experience :( )

Well, lights out tonight Trouble in the heartland Got a head on collision Smashin' in my guts, man I'm caught in a cross fire That I don't understand

so, we have one of those openings of bruce’s that cold kick you into the scene that imvho are one of his trademark points and I love him dearly for it which immediately projects you into the scene: we’re in the heartland and the lights are out tonight, which means that it’s night and it’s dark and already from the first two lines you can contrast the upbeat rhythm with the utter bleakness of the opening. by the way, if we all failed geography like jon and sansa, this is what we mean with badlands:

and with heartland we mean that part in the US that goes from north dakota/iowa to kansas/missouri roughly, so we can assume that our narrator comes from some small town in center-USA and he’s not enjoying his time there that much. see, two lines and you already have situation, mood and location - this guy knows how to write a song, amrite?

so, other than that, it’s lights out and this guy has a collision in his guts, which makes you immediately think of a car accident inside his body in one of the most tender parts of it/in the part that gets upset when we feel sick first, which is supposed to make you feel his visceral unhappiness at his situation. also, he’s caught in a crossfire ie he feels in the middle of a bunch of different problems that jump at him and he doesn’t understand them, which also means that he hasn’t straightened them out and he doesn’t exactly know what’s wrong with him, but he knows that he has problems and that his life isn’t what he wants.

But there's one thing I know for sure, girl I don't give a damn For the same old played out scenes Baby, I don't give a damn For just the in-betweens Honey, I want the heart, I want the soul I want control right now You better listen to me, baby

so: now he addresses a girl, which means he’s talking to a woman who’s supposedly his love interest, and he tells her he knows one thing at least, which is that... as before we have guessed he’s in some situation of stasis that he dislikes while he feels caught in a bunch of problems he can’t face/figure out/have a grip on, and his visceral reaction to it is that he wants to cut away with all of that, he wants to stop rehashing his old life (the same old played out scenes/just the in-betweens), and he immediately states it as he says that he wants the heart, the soul and control, as in: he wants to have back his feelings (his heart), his life (the soul) that he feels he doesn’t have anymore and mostly he wants control over them, as if until now he’s felt like he didn’t have it and everyone else was taking all the decisions, and he presses to his girl saying that she has to listen to him. seems like he’s decided, right?

Talk about a dream Try to make it real You wake up in the night With a fear so real You spend your life waiting For a moment that just don't come Well, don't waste your time waiting

now, here we have one of the most iconic lines bruce ever put to music (the first four verses) which would deserve treatises, but anyway, for what we can do: he tells her that they have dreams that they shouldn’t forget and that they should try to make them real ie they shouldn’t be there worrying about played out scenes and in-betweens, but then they wake up with a fear so real that they can’t do it, and at this point you feel their fear too because he’s singing in a way that about throws all of that in your face. but then he says you spend your life waiting for a moment that just don’t come and that hits you even more because don’t we all wait to do things/wait for the right moment to experience things/throw ourselves into what we want to do and then it passes and you think it’s gone? yeah, that. and with that he says that we shouldn’t, and we go into the immortal refrain, as in:

Badlands, you gotta live it everyday Let the broken hearts stand As the price you've gotta pay Keep pushin' 'til it's understood And these badlands start treating us good

now: living the badlands every day (look at the above) is obviously a way to say suffering through your life while feeling overwhelmed (don’t you feel overwhelmed just looking at those pictures?) while the broken hearts stand as in, your heart being broken is the price you’ve got to pay because life is shitty, but if you *push until you get it* then the badlands might start treating you good and you might turn your life around. that’s the message, but it becomes even more obvious when you go ahead with the rest:

Workin' in the fields That'll get your back burned Workin' 'neath the wheels 'Til you get your facts learned Baby, I got my facts Learned real good right now You better get it straight, darlin'

so: our narrator has a physically demanding and hard job (working in the fields/’neath the wheels) which causes him physical problems (back burned) and he had to suffer through that to learn his facts real good, which he stresses repeating it twice, and then explains:

Poor man wanna be rich Rich man wanna be king And a king ain't satisfied 'Til he rules everything I wanna go out tonight I wanna find out what I got

admittedly, it’s not the most original moral but it’s because it’s true: poor people want to be rich (of course), the rich never have enough and want to rule over the others (be king) and the kings/rulers/people in power have no satisfaction until they have everything under their rule because their ego is out of control and power breeds power and no one ever has enough of it (seems like grrm likes bruce). our dude, who’s definitely poor and not a king, just wants to go out tonight and find out what he’s got. and what does he have?

Well, I believe in the love that you gave me I believe in the faith that can save me I believe in the hope and I pray That someday it may raise me Above these

so, he has three things: the love his girlfriend gave him so we can suppose she definitely has an agency in this relationship and he didn’t expect her to give it to him, he has faith that he can be saved from his crap life (could be faith in god or the love he feels for her or both) and he has hope and prays that all of this might raise him above the badlands, ie: that the fact that he has love in his life and that love gave him hope might give him the push to leave his crap life behind and get to something better that he desperately yearns for.

Badlands, you gotta live it everyday Let the broken hearts stand As the price you've gotta pay Keep pushin' 'til it's understood And these badlands start treating us good

now you see that the refrain repeated at this point has a new layer added to it, right? now, you should really be listening to the song because that’s when clarence clemons’s immortal sax solo happens and brings you to another dimension and then it slows down before the last part is basically a whole crescendo which believe me in a concert is a mystical experience. also, get ready for one of the Best Lines Bruce Ever Wrote In His Life:

For the ones who had a notion, a notion deep inside That it ain't no sin to be glad you're alive I wanna find one face that ain't looking through me I wanna find one place I wanna spit in the face of these

now: here we get the nail on the head ie he sums up the entire deal in two lines: this song is for the people with a notion deep inside ie a need so bad it’s etched inside them and nothing can carve it out or take it from them that there’s nothing sinful or bad in being glad you’re alive as in, in being glad you are because then you can keep on living and make things better for yourself rather than just give up and die in a life that you hate, and those people should find a face that doesn’t look through them (as in, someone who sees them for who they really are and loves them for it), one place (as in, a place to live that they want to live in), and they should spit in the face of the badlands ie the horrible life they feel like they can’t conquer but that they need to leave behind.

I mean, it’s basically spitting in the face of what hurt you until now and go off to live your life and trying to be happy, what’s to hate about it? and if you listened to that song, you’d know that at this point the crescendo ends and it kicks into the last refrain:

Badlands, you gotta live it everyday Let the broken hearts stand As the price you've gotta pay Keep movin' 'til it's understood And these badlands start treating us good

which is the same as before obviously, but now has three different layers more to it and tops perfectly a gem of a song that is deservedly one of bruce’s most beloved ones by us all fans and that should be more known to the casual listener because it’s truly iconic and speaks to all of us because we all felt like that at some point, didn’t we?

thank you so much for indulging me in my springsteen extravaganza anon! you might find it a little difficult to do it again I fear, but if you find a way I’ll be delighted to find you some other iconic song to dissect. happy early springsteen birthday!!!! :)

[staygtv]

MINI ROCKER TAPE VOL.1 [directed.Nau5]

3.intermission

Shit still the same nigga

I think I might change (yea yea yea yea)

Know you can never change niggas

And you can never change wit em

(No no no)

Different body same bitches

Different life

it’s all a game

riches

Bad bitches

lookin for tricks named Richard

Survival don’t realize that life rented

Shit still the same nigga

I think I might change (yea yea yea yea)

Know you can never change niggas

And you can never change wit em

(No no no)

Different body same bitches

Different life

it’s all a game

riches

Save your change

Stay away from fame go

Manifest a bag up

Put my tag up

One one one one one

Where giants stood

And above it

Is where I walk the path

Pushin good wood

Good wood stuffed

With good good

I use to sk8 and walk on ipath

Only difference now

What I prefer Air Force ones

When I land

Air guns elite force kid

I’m plinking out cans

Day dreaming bout the faces of enemy’s

Peaceful with energy

So tread lightly around me

That’s why my house lookin lonely

Only keep one bitch around me

Try to block out surroundings

Manifest what’s around me

Write about what I wanna feel

Someday

This ticket only one way

Expires every Sunday

By Monday renews

Still trying for ..

like I got something to prove

Somewhere in between south river st

And when Jesus lives

When I went walked on the path

Just to avoid the grass

And now

Puff puf puf puf don’t even pass

Airforce 2 on a mini rocker

‘Buck in my pocket

?

Fuck it let’s profit

From painting and robbin the city black

Face up with the back of my jacket

Patch by a local artist

Flat where I landed

I thought I had it

Handle tweakd when I planted

panicked

Pressure not anticipated

Watched me die in the park

If we end up out east after dark

Bring a lighter we can spark

Teach a bitch how to peddle backwards

On the handle bars

Ass up on the handle bars

Riding on my handle

Grippin ammo

Flickin pics

And dickin models

She grippin both hands

Yeah I just learned how to disaster chill

Smile in ur sleep

I seen The diamonds in her teeth

Rocker in the mil

Learning

now i get brain when I feel

tv.part2

Richer than bitch if wealth is truly of mind

But whatever with that

I be liking money just fine

Transfer over the spine

Been at the back of the line

Patiently waiting for liberation

Freedom in isolation

Been misbehaving

Had to pay with some dates

Had to pay by my babys sufferance

Im not there like every single day

forgive my past mistakes

To a stranger I remain

Won’t ever recognize

my unmistakable face

Marked up

Notice by none

Known by few

Hop up over the gap

I’m in my white gap denim

Paint splattered

No 511

Buck mark in my pocket

No fiber optic

Just plain old view

If I ever start missing my target

Then I might try something new

Throwin art up like I’m frank miller

This new sin city

For a Franklin I’m weed dealer

But only if you got titties

Barley smoke with bitches

Only cool with 2 bitches

If know then you know

So it ain’t shit to hit the road

I don’t fuck wit niggas,

white drug dealers

Or hoes

tv.show intro

Coming soon to screens everywhere

Stayg.tv

Presents

Music to ride your bike to

A classic program

For the whole family to enjoy

In the city

in the streets

outside the residential

Art district

Ridin on 10 inch rims

Stay gold hymns

Hum to the ra

By the collar of my custom

Btc do big bombs

Street Steezey

In a wu tang tee

An undeniable talent

Raw like papers

Did you do your daily cbd?

Finna b chill

Finna btc

See I’m Standing at the top of the hill

I can feel when it’s real

Fat wheels

Dog dare me to kill

Stash currency

Hiding cash

Thrasher taking up a residency

To thrash

Keep them people in the past

And let it be

Let it happen if it happen

Like tv shows

Ain’t no controllin

Just the Chanel

And the volume

And the input mode

Drippin in paint, gold

Swimming in Info

Creative is a state we all been to

But no one from out there

Kill yourself if you care

Watching Og props

On a iPod touch

Big Air m4. is a stick

Hop on whip off

The porch

Stomping in sum airforce ones

legal guns and legal drugs

All of the above

Written by: Staygold Ky

[woozletania]

Sanctuary, part 11 (final chapter)

It all ends in a dance number.  How else could it, really?

*****

It was no real surprise that Sharptooth ate his meals raw, and bloody. It was also no surprise that the feral Uplift had a noticeable space around him at the table. People gave him elbow room. But they didn't shy away from him.  Rocket nodded his approval as the sable looked up, red-muzzled, and reached out to take a cup from Blackjack.

"You knew this was happening to me, Pete," Rocket grumbled.  Lylla was off talking to Doc Foster about some trivial matter.  "Why didn't you warn me?  I didn't know what the hell was goin' on."

"I don't know what you're talking about, Rock," Peter said with an admirably straight face.

"'That's how it starts'," Rocket quoted. "You knew.  You been through all this, why didn't you help?"

"The battle for a man's first love is a battle he must fight himself," Drax rumbled.

"You too, Drax?"

"I am Groot."

"I know you were pushin' our beds closer together. You think I couldn't smell where you touched 'em? How did you know, though? No offense buddy, but you're a tree."

"I am Groot," said the tree, who stood perhaps a foot taller than Rocket now but was still a shadow of his former self.

"Oh," said Rocket, and he looked down at the table.  "'Course you do."

"What'd he say, what'd he say," Star-Lord said, poking Rocket with his elbow.

"He said," Lylla said as she returned, "'As soon as you had me bring her your bed, and then limped over and climbed in with her when she was afraid, I knew.  I'm not like you, but I know what love is'."

"Woulda done that for anybody," Rocket grumbled.

"No you wouldn't," Peter said with a grin.  "And I've never seen so you so desperate to apologize to someone.  It was obvious, man."

"I'd just never met anyone who, who," Rocket fished for an explanation.

"Smelled so nice?" Lylla said, and nuzzled his neck.

"Was like me," Rocket finished.  "Knows what it's like to be like me. And smells nice," he smiled.

"Shrimp?" said the white-furred Uplift with a darker mask around her eyes.  She had Lylla's long body but fluffier fur and resembled a less massive version of Sharptooth. 'Ferret', Peter had called her.

"Thank you Alyssum," Rocket said, and took a pot of cooked shrimp for himself and one for Lylla. "Doctor Zek's afraid of you, by the way."

"He should be," said the ferret with a fanged smile.  "I make most of the food around here.  It'd be easy to 'accidentally' put something bad in his dinner.  But look at him," she said with a nod in the Kree's direction.

Rocket didn't need to.  He'd already seen the badly concealed fear on the doctor's face as he tried to keep track of every Uplift in the room.  Blackjack and Sharptooth were helping his blood pressure rise by fading partially out of sight every time he started to look away from them. He'd snap back around, trying not to look panicked, and they would be fully visible again, innocently eating their dinners.

"He wasn't so bad," Lylla chirped.  "I kind of feel sorry for him."

"Just as Ego's crimes finally destroyed him," Mantis said, "the doctor's will haunt him to the grave."

"That's why he provoked you, Rocket.  He wanted you to kill him," said Lylla.

"He wanted to kill someone," Rocket said with no pity in his voice.  "Me or him. I don't know what would have happened if you hadn't been there."

Rocket's wrist computer pinged, and he stood, the tail of a half eaten shrimp hanging from his mouth.  "Back in a bit.  Lylla?" She didn't need his help to rise, but he held her hand as she did anyway.

"It's weird seeing him so..." Peter said.

"Happy?" Added Gamora.

"Whole.  I think he's finally whole. It's like she is everything he was missing in life. When we met him he desperately wanted respect, and he finally got it. But whether he knew it or not, he was still missing something."

"Love," Mantis said.

Peter nodded.. "I wonder how she got him to say he loved her."

"She put him a situation where he either had to admit it or lose her," Gamora said, and bit the head off a shrimp.

"Yeah, I know that one," Peter said, and smiled as he took her hand. "Dance later?"

"Definitely."

Rocket and Lylla made their way past the newest Uplifts, the ones recovered by Nova Corps from yet another illicit animal research project. This research team had experimented on larger Terran species.  Among the half dozen odd creatures was a large hard-shelled reptilian thing and a massive, tusked aquatic creature so nonanthropomorphic that it used extendable waldoes in a chest pack to manipulate its environment.  Rocket had spoken to 'Wal' for a few minutes earlier, and respected the mind housed in that whiskery thick-skinned head.

They reached the Uplift-sized podium and Rocket cleared his throat before speaking into the microphone. "Hello, everyone.  You know who I am.  The first thing I'd like to say is that everything you've been through, the pain, the horror. Some of it is my fault."

He took Lylla's hand before going on. "Because I joined the Guardians, and with them saved lives, abandoned Uplift projects were revived. People will always try to copy success.  Bad people will do it no matter how much they must hurt others to do it."

It was Lylla's turn to speak. "Earlier today, I was offered a job as the liaison from we Uplifts to Xandar.  My communication skills were considered useful. I refused this offer."

That provoked quiet conversation in the small groups of Uplifts.  "We had another idea.  Right now, out there among the stars, other research teams are torturing creatures like us to create more tools, more weapons."

Rocket again.  "And we are going to find them, stop them, and free the new Uplifts. Nova Corps has agreed to fund the Guardians in their effort to do this and house any we free. We're going to be very busy.  At some point we'll need help. I already know where I'll find some of it." Across the room he looked at the small table that held Sharptooth, Blackjack and gray-furred Foxtrot, then his gaze picked out a few other Uplifts in the room. Blackjack, speaking for his table, looked back and nodded emphatically.

When he went on, his voice was so low they had to strain to hear.  "I envy you.  When I escaped, I was the only Uplift I knew of.  You, even in this small room full of you," he gestured, and his voice returned to full volume, "Are not alone! And soon there will be more. One day we'll have a whole community. One day I hope to help build us a home.

"For now," and he looked across the room at Doctor Zek, seated next to Paul Foster, "Don't hate these men.  Some we will have to kill, but most are merely misguided. The truly bad ones we'll make pay. The others we'll let the law punish.  Sometimes, letting them live is more cruel than the alternative," he said with a grin, and his eyes never left the researcher who'd led the team that made Lylla. The man who lived now surrounded by people who loathed him, never knowing when one might strike. It would be a lonely existence.  Rocket knew what that was like.

One day he might forgive Zek.  He'd forgiven the men who created him, eventually.  But he wasn't there yet.

Lylla leaned forward to speak. "Dessert will be served in a little while.  For now, I'd like to see how many of you know how to dance!" With that Peter plugged a line into his Zune and music came from the room PA system. He and Rocket had argued over the playlist, but both agreed that a song from that thing called "Grease" was the way to start.

It was a strange way to end the evening, to Rocket's thinking, but it had its moments.  Watching two-meter-tall Drax dancing with a ferret less than half his height, watching Groot grin and flail his tendrils like jump ropes at a lightning-quick sable who slipped past to run up and over him before springing off to dodge again. Watching three bunnies dance, one flicking in and out of visibility and the others trying very hard to find him before his sneaking hands found their way into untoward places.  Watching Peter and Gamora dance, not for the first time. Watching a one-ton walrus undulate along the floor, laughing all the while as smaller Uplifts used his huge body as a slide.

And dancing with Lylla, of course. Rocket was strong, a good fighter (though not as good as her, he'd admit), an expert marksman and pilot, and the best intuitive technician anyone hereabouts had ever met.

But a terrible dancer.  Rocket cursed as he trod on her foot again, and Lylla giggled.  "It's OK, dear.  Give it time, you'll learn." Dancing apparently fell under the increasingly nebulous umbrella of 'diplomatic skills' that she was good at.

"Just so long as you're my teacher," Rocket said with a grin, and pulled her close.  At least he was figuring out this 'kissing' business.

A week ago he'd been alone in a galaxy full of people, the only one of his kind. There was still only one Rocket, one Uplifted raccoon.  There was also only one otter. Most of the other Uplifts were singletons too.

That was all right.  The others would learn what he'd finally learned, if they didn't know it already. You didn't need someone exactly like you to fall in love.

"You're the one that I want, indeed," Rocket said with a grin.

"You're the one that I need," Lylla said back.  And the dancing, the kissing, and what came later, that turned out to be a fine way to end an evening after all.

[knight-gwaine]

i keep talkin bout you bc youre my only real way of measuring my progress. you were the best and worst. yesterday or honestly whenever, i made posts along the lines of some shit like you suck ass, which ya do, but if you got your life together we could be friends or sum. but i mean. that’s a concept. what i’m realising is that every day, i’m getting further away from you. and that is a GOD DAMN BLESSING. i say all these nice things but thats for the fake fun and great version of you that exists in my head as just a comforting thought when i feel like thinking about love. but damn, i keep forgetting until i really think about it that, i literally am so fucking happy to be away. i am so happy we never have to be friends again and talk and shit. because you /seem/ cool, especially when we barely talk but if i had to actually deal with you. id rather punch myself in the god damn face. also wow it sucks that id still be down for your dick bc you be lookin like a god damn mess like eww??? i barely /actually/ see you and then when i do i realise oh yeah this b for real aint shit. like i wonder what he is actually getting done w his life. and okay, any progress is great. like if you on your own are trying. great. thats fantastic like im proud of you. everyobe works at their own pace. but in terms of me being friends w you. nah b, you lame as fuck. i aint got time for that. i have been meeting waaayy too many incredible peoole this year and have done waaay to many incredible things to be settlin for someone like you. idk dude. i see you. i hear things about you. i see the shit you do and say and i know you cant judge someone really unless you really get to know em or whatever but sometimes peoples social media and their friends can say a looooottt about them. a lot. and i do not. ever. wanna. fuck. w. you. HEEELLL NOOO.

as much as i wish for myself to never speak of you again and all that. i dont think thats going to happen for a long time. three years is a long time. even if this one seems to have lasted forever, three years is longer. and thinking back on all of it helps me realise how much ive progressed. and how much i keep progressing every day. i literally can only remember one. one. bad day. through this whole year. only one. maybe two? i remember one bad moment? but ive only ever had one bad day.

it is such a feeling. to finally. be free. all my emotions are controlled by me. i never feel depressed and alone on a cloudy quiet sunday. i never feel dreary when its pouring rain out. i never feel affected by the mundane weather. because i have done so much and i honestly will never stop. because what is the point in not trying to have fun and live your best life every moment of your life? fr that one song by anderson paak, i aint never comin down. i spent too much time bein scared and believing i was incapable and antisocial and no one likes me or whatever. but how do people get rid of their fears? you go out and face it. i feel like i can do almost anything now, im not gonna lie. like, if i really want to. because thats genuinely all it takes. if you WANT to do something, you will find a way to do it. so you will succeed. if you WANT to, even if theres everything stopping you, you find a way around it. once you realise that, nothing fucking stops you. i say this same old stuff over and over again but it just took me so long to learn and you hear about it but you never believe it. i still am amazed every day by how my life is now.

i have met some of the most phenomenal and successful people this year. i never would’ve thought first of all that they would even like me or want to talk to me but you would be damn well surprised by people’s kindness. growing up sheltered and being called annoying, dumb, and all other things, you end up believeing no one will like you its just automatic. this year, got to become friends with my favourite people that i always wanted to hang out with. i got to befriend amazing artists and photographers that are huge in my town. everyone who meets me automatically wants to be my friend. even strangers?? random people that sit next to me in class. doing leads you to meet people. and meeting people leads you to doing. its a fantastic cycle if you think about it. life is never boring. i appreciate all the small little things in my life so much more now. everything. if you arent happy with your life, find a way to make yourself happy. you arent stuck unless you give up and stop trying to change yourself. these. are the reasons why i wouldnt want you back in my life. my life is too phenomenal now. my life is too fantastic for you to be in you wouldnt fit. plus, i think im way too positive for you now. and i unapologetically love myself and every aspect of who i am now and i am constantly working on bettering me that i feel like itd just be too much? id be obnoxious to you i feel like?? and youd be boring. you would be boring. i like your interests. i love hearing what you have to say about music and movies and weird random facts but. i also dont trust you to be a good person. after all that you did too, nah. i dont need that negativity. it would be outrageous for me to believe we are connected in anyway. i hope. i mean this in all honesty with my whole being. i hope youre happy w your girl or whateva bc i want you outta mine. she better be takin fuckin care of your dumbass though i stg. i dont care when my boys get w other girls as long as i know their taken care of. vasya when he got w chelsea? immediately got over my crush for him and was happy af bc she was better than me. max, if he gets w anyone aside from cheyenne i will beat his ass. that b better fuckin be pushing you to strive for the best. she better be pushin you to realise your worth and what youre capable of and pushin you to try new things because LIFE IS TOO FUN TO NOT GO OUT AND HAVE FUN. COOK SHIT TOGETHER. GO HIKE. GO DANCE. DO SHIT. GROW UP. THINK SMART.

i fr dont know what the point of this post is im really out here just writin whatever comes to mind. bc one day i’m gonna go back through all my personal posts and ill remember how my life was rn and ill be like damn. that shit was sick as fuck. life was lit as fuck. tbh i think i was just really shook by that photo of you. ive been writing gay shit bout you for a while and then i saw that and i was like OH FUCK ABORT MISSION THAT B UGLY AS HELL AND HAS NO LIFE BACK OUT BACK OUT and now im here. straight shook. yeah. i dont want you in my life. my life is way better without you. i really am an unstoppable force right now. school is a motherfuckin one. friends are fucking precious and successful amazing wholesome human beings that are also out here doin the motherfuckin most im so proud i love all my friends we are all such successful people with amazing futures ahead of us god im so proud im 😭😭😭 we really out here chasin our dreams n shit. aND SUCCEEDIN. and money situation is L I T. ya baby’s got a fine ass mercedes w the best dad in the world getting me AUTOSTART for this cold winter???? ya baby be workin out and doin yoga everyday, abs comin in HOT. ya gurl developin as an artist with her dream school hittin her the FUCK up for her portfolio?? i am a for real artist now but i refuse to realise my big stuff. only sketches for now, dear world. the public eye doesnt need to see me as an artist yet. no. because they always will bc its always me. but no. i gotta act chill. this isnt the artist years of your life yet. you aint settled down yet no. now is time for fun, life, school, that grind 😤���, and ecology. BE THAT SICK ASS SCIENTIST BITCH. BE SMART AS FUCK AND SAVE THE EARTH.

2017 got three more months left. i already know that im gonna have the funnest fucking time. fam is leavin for xmas and my sister’s moving out?? ff got house parties like wild?? EVERY MONTH??? northern lights are comin out??? you dont have to wake up early for school so you can go chase them??? A N D YOU HAVE A BUNCHA FRIENDS NOW TO GO WITH??? AND WINTER IS COMING SO THERES GONNA BE MORE EVENTS INSIDE TO GO TO??? AND MEET PEOPLE?? AND YA GETTIN MORE HIGHER PAYING JOBS WITH HELLA TIPS??? YES. i said i was gonna make 2017 my bitch. boy the fuck did i and i am gonna end it with a muthafuckin bang.