#she never actually gets to be fully happy
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𝓛𝓪𝓼𝓽 𝓒𝓱𝓻𝓲𝓼𝓽𝓶𝓪𝓼
Wanda Maximoff x fem!reader, Natasha Romanoff x fem!reader (past)
Summary: After last years incident you don't know if you can move on, but Wanda shows you how real love feels.
Word Count: 1.1K
Warnings: Hurt/comfort, Nat cheats
AU: Pietro is alive :D
Author's note: Merry Christmas! I wasn't planning on making another fic for Christmas, but I was listening to Christmas music while wrapping and well here you go~
Snow was gently falling in New York making everything feel more magical. All the decor was up, the tree fully lit at the Rockefeller center and people were bustling more than usual to get their Christmas shopping done.
You were trying to pick a gift out for your secret Santa, Wanda. Tony did this every year for his holiday party. You really weren't in the mood for it this year, but you were trying…after last Christmas things didn't feel as magical.
Last Year
“Come on Tasha! We're gonna be late if you take any longer on your make-up!” You playfully called out. She smirked at you through the mirror.
“Don't worry Detka, we'll make it.” Her sultry voice wrapped around you. You looked her over as she stood; a tight short black dress, tights, heels to match. Her hair was pulled into a fancy braid she'd mentioned the name of earlier, but you couldn't remember it.
The party was in full swing by the time you two arrived. You were in fact upset about it because Natasha knows how you hate to be late because of your anxiety. As soon as you set your gift on the table for secret Santa Natasha was gone in the crowd. Interacting with the boys and Maria. You frowned, but went to grab some finger foods and a drink while you found the twins and Vision. The three of them are talking about experiencing Christmas for the first time.
You sat yourself next to Wanda with the boys across the table on another couch. The four of you talking for a bit before you realized Natasha hadn't come to find you.
A pout covered your mouth as you got up, “I'll be back guys I'm gonna go check on Tasha.” You excused yourself making your way through the crowd of people, looking everywhere until in the corner of your eye, her dress caught your eye. Your head turning and the glass in your hand falling with a sharp crash to the tiled floor.
Natasha was kissing Maria.
You were noticed by many including Natasha who looked like she had regret on her face. Not for the kiss itself, but because she was caught.
You walked out of that party and didn't look back.
Present Day
You got yourself ready, looking over yourself in the mirror and then at the clock. You'd be a little early which was perfect. You grabbed your gift for Wanda. It was perfect for her. It was a few different things.
Tony never had limits on how much to spend. If you got him as your secret Santa you could expect a car or a new place to live.
You got there, hugging Tony with a smile. “I'm surprised you decided to actually come. You even have your gift!” Tony said surprised. You gave him a roll of your eyes.
“Yeah I wasn't sure if I'd come at first after last year I felt sick thinking about it and about seeing her. I gave her my heart Tony…she gave it away. I decided if I did come this year then…I'd give it to someone special…” you explained to him. Tony was like your annoying older brother. You told him a lot of your problems and he was happy to listen.
He gave you another hug, a nice tight one where you could smell his cologne clearly, making your nose scrunch up a bit.
“Go get her.” He whispered before letting go.
It was hours into the party. You'd spent the whole time with the twins. Vision had gone off to talk with Tony at some point and now it was time for secret Santa. You got up, grabbing your gift to Wanda and you were surprised to see she had you as well.
The two of you laughed, deciding to go find her old room in the tower so you two could have a quiet moment to open each other's gifts.
You both sat across from each other, she was cross legged in her usual black skirt and thigh highs, a low cut tank top and a dark gray cardigan fell off one shoulder that she kept fixing. Rings adorned all her fingers, some having multiple. You smiled as you gave her your gift.
“Open yours first Wands.” You insisted, making her giggle which had your stomach doing flips. Biting the inside of your cheek to try to hide the effect the witch had on you.
She opened up the bag that contained a few wrapped gifts.
“You didn't have to get me so much.” She said with her honeyed accent.
“I couldn't decide…they all felt like they were perfect for you.” You saw the barely There blush that covered her cheeks as she refused to look up from unwrapping.
You'd gotten her a new mug that said village witch with a little graphic of a witches hut, the smoke coming out of it a ghost. The next gift was a variety pack of different teas from around the world. The last gift you'd gotten her was a new set of tarot cards.
“Oh y/n! These are amazing and I love them! I can't wait to try the teas and you're getting the first reading with this tarot deck.” She said, leaning forward to hug you tight. “Now it's your turn!” She squealed excitedly.
You smiled, taking the gift from her, opening it up, your jaw dropped. You just stared for a minute, speechless before looking up at her.
“You…you made me a burr basket?” you asked dumbfounded.
You'd asked Natasha for boo baskets and burr baskets and she never got them or made them and it hurt every time.
“Yeah you kept talking about them so I wanted to make you one. I hope I did it right. I watched a bunch of tiktoks on making them and how others had them.” She rambled out.
Tears welled up in your eyes, there was a blanket, slippers, flannel pj's pants, a face mask, eye mask, a little holiday squishmallow, lip balm, your favorite perfume, and some seasonal chocolate.
“W-Wands…I…i don't have words this is…I…” you physically couldn't form words. You looked up at her and realized the only thing you could do to say thank you was kiss her.
You moved the gifts out of the way, crawling forward and letting your lips brush against hers, when she didn't pull away you pushed into her, letting your lips pressed together. Your hand cupped her cheek as her lips started to move against yours.
When you both needed air you pulled back just a little, your foreheads touching.
“I wasn't expecting that as a thank you, but I won't lie…I've been wanting you to kiss me like that since I came to America…” she confessed. How had you not noticed what was right in front of you this whole time?
“Wands…would you do me the honor of being my girlfriend?” You ask softly.
“I thought you'd never ask.” She practically growled before kissing you again.
This wouldn't be like with Natasha. You knew this was different. You could feel it.
She was your someone special.
#Ley writes#ley writes one shots#ley speaks#ley writes#ley writes series#wanda maximoff#wanda maximoff x reader#wanda maximoff x fem!reader#wanda maximoff x y/n#wanda maximoff x female reader#wanda maximoff x you
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viktor headcanons
[modern-ish edition + meljayvik because I cannot resist, also I'm desperate to see more unhinged little ideas about him outside of being everyone's favorite blorbo. we should fear that man and this is my thesis]
learned a weird amalgamation of martial arts and self defense as a kid due to growing up in zaun. despite being in what was considered the "safer" part of the underground, his mother worried he wouldn't be safe on his own. his core strength and arm strength are absolutely ridiculous
in fact, one time he was hooking up with a fellow academy student, and by the time the whole affair was over with, he was hardly breaking a sweat while the other person was trying to catch their breath. he became somewhat of a local legend at frat parties because not only can he wear someone out for hours but, allegedly, he's real freaky with it too
knows the exact monetary value of different human body organs on the black market. whether or not this is from experience is something jayce and mel are unable to determine. vi is also knowledgeable of this and has traded tragic backstories with him in detail
has had to kill a man before, and tells this to jayce frequently to win petty arguments (jayce never actually believes him, even though it is fully and one hundred percent true). it doesn't work on mel
jayce and mel have a secret chart written of how many substances viktor has tried and with how much frequency. weed is at the top of the list, with alcohol being shockingly low. in spite of coming from a slavic background, viktor didn't learn how to hold very much liquor without feeling ill, but for some reason is fine with the illicit psychedelics that grow naturally in the undercity near the runoff tunnels. so far the list is nearly half a page long
will not hit anyone with his mobility aids but will ABSOLUTELY find ways to blackmail and hustle his way out of embarrassment. he learned the blackmailing skill from mel, and frequently looks to her for information since she somehow knows the most about the student body
extremely morbid sense of humor. jokes about being fatherless/motherless behavior and then hits you with, "I would know :]." mel is an honorary member of the motherless behavior banter, considering her own mother disowned her shortly before she came to piltover
taking care of one another is equal parts give and take with him, jayce, and mel, but it's never in a way that demeans each other or exploits each other's weaknesses. for example, viktor hates being carried or manhandled without consent and finds it incredibly patronizing if someone assumes he needs help without just asking him (common sense, but the student body is full of ableist sharks). if he's having a bad pain day or is finding it hard to move, he and jayce (or he and mel, depending on time and place) have a system for getting him to or from somewhere without drawing much attention and even have specific "I need help but don't want to be stared at about it" phrases
father's half of the family is slavic and mother's half of the family is romani. cannot follow a recipe unless it has specific measurements, but can improvise ANY stew or potato based dish with little more than his nose and a few kitchen tools. jayce can improvise any dish, but will always somehow overdo the spice if it calls for spice. mel is happy to try any and everything they make (on her birthday, she's spoiled with their attempts at making the ethnic food from her family, and she'll never tell them but she's very touched by their efforts)
owned ONE pet in his life and it was a hamster. instead of freaking out over it's death, he studied it's body post mortem until his father declared it a biohazard and forced him to dispose of it
learned most of his chemists knowledge from a disgraced former academy professor, but taught himself everything else he knows (if he couldn't get access to it in school). including, for fun, how to preserve and analyze body parts. he initially wanted to be a surgeon or biomedical engineer, but then stuck with chemistry (specifically regarding infectious diseases) to try and find a cure for the grey
shows up randomly at jayces or mels dorms at strange hours in the evening/morning. the first time he showed up at mel's, she thought a burglary was being attempted. he made it out with a bad knock to the head, but she did make him tea in the aftermath as an apology (he hated it but drank the whole thing anyway)
gets stoned with jinx on the weekends, since she's the only one who can find him good, ethically sourced weed. he pays her back by teaching her things he's learning and researching at the academy
meljayvik + caitvi + timebomb dates but they have to find a way to rent out the whole place because each and every one of them has Some Kind of History with the other academy students even though jinx and ekko are still a couple years shy of college age
viktor threw up at the distinguished innovators competition because jayce did first. it was a whole disaster. they spent hours after the ordeal hyping each other up on gatorade and pure adrenaline. it was the physically worst jayce has ever felt around viktor but far from the worst viktor has ever felt around jayce. this was just days after the two of them met mel, and she spent the rest of the evening forcing them to sleep or eat something that wasn't "pure chemicals." somehow, this ended in a heated debate between herself and viktor about the validity of gatorade as a substantial meal. he still refuses to admit he lost
I've said this before and I'll say it again: he has a closet full of ramen. mel takes from his stash often
can run on caffeine and very little sleep to the point where he is physically incapable of resting like a normal human being without feeling drained. flu season is absolute hell
showed up to one of his lectures shirtless once because he was in a hurry. fed everyone who looked at him funny the most outrageous sob story about how "weak" he was, then laughed about it with mel and jayce like an absolute sociopath for days about it. jayce did not find it altogether very funny. mel and him still joke about it
beat vi in an arm wrestling contest before he got sick. still almost beat her after his diagnosis too, but still took the betting money anyway. she'll never admit she's slightly terrified of him, but it shows
can wield many different kinds of knives but is terribly clumsy when it comes to other weapons like clubs and swords and staffs. tapped out of adaptive sports within his first week because it was "boring him." spent the next month teaching martial arts to his fellow disabled peers until the board made it an official extracurricular
turned sky down in the nicest but most insane way possible. nobody knows what happened or how, just that they ended up spending MORE time together after the fact and that it involved illicit activities. the rumors were insufferable for weeks. and wildly funny
(please feel free to add more, I'm gonna start a collection)
#arcane#viktor arcane#arcane viktor#viktor#jayvik#melvik#meljayvik#mel x jayce x viktor#arcane headcanon#arcane headcanons#arcane lol#viktor headcanons#jayvik headcanons#meljayvik headcanons#cannot believe that wasn't a tag to begin with wtf ??
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The Menhara Rabbit and the Yandere Wolf (Manga)
Created by: Hayu Shiori
Genre: Romance
@erednayy translated a whole entire thing for this one, so this is going to be a long journey of typesetting. I was a little skeptical of it mostly because I'm not super as into the older manga style, but it actually is a pretty good time and the development of the relationship between the yandere and the main character, Tsumugi and Itoshi is actually pretty interesting, as it shows the struggles and happiness of their relationship as a whole. On the first day we'll also be just dumping the first volume on everyone like a late Christmas gift. If you like our stuff, please donate to us on Ko-fi for more yandere stuff.
The story starts out quickly with Tsumugi looking through her boyfriend's phone before her boyfriend, Shouma, finally breaks up with her and kicks her out. Tsumugi begs for his forgiveness, with Shouma complaining about her menhara tendencies: being too emotionally intense, clingy and otherwise hard to deal with. We see that the reason she developed into a menhara was due to her first boyfriend, who confessed and then pretty much immediately dumped her for another girl, causing her to become extremely anxious over her future boyfriend's feelings and being more of a doormat to please them. Shouma attempts to beat Tsumugi for everything she's done, but she is saved by her neighbor, Itoshi, and brings her to his room to give her some clothes (as she was kicked out in only her undergarments). After some introductions, Itoshi comforts Tsumugi for what happened with her ex-boyfriend, telling her it's not her fault for the situation, even stating that he would be happy to have such a cute girlfriend as Tsumugi. Tsumugi, misinterprets this kindness as flirting and tries to kiss him, but Itoshi pushes her away. This causes Tsumugi to lash out at Itoshi for being kind to her and begging him to stay as she's incredibly scared of being lonely after being broken up with. Itoshi is able to comfort and Tsumugi, as she cries, eventually falling asleep. It's then that Itoshi reveals his yandere tendencies, taking a picture of her as she sleeps and promising to make her happy, no matter what. Upon waking up, Tsumugi finds out pretty quickly that Itoshi has been stalking her, as his phone has photos of her and her password is based off her birthday. She freaks out and starts to spiral believing that she can never be loved and that her failed relationships are all her fault. Despite finding out that he's her stalker, she still wants to be with him as he accepted all of her flaws. We get a flashback of Itoshi's point of view, seeing him get dumped by an ex for being too stalker like in front of Tsumugi's apartment. Here she comforts him and he falls for her. As a neighbor, he can hear her and Shouma's arguments and love making and due to this he becomes more and more obsessed over her. Itoshi after finding Tsumugi promises to delete all of his photos though Tsumugi stops him and realizes how similar they are, both being people who go too far and don't feel like they're loved. The two of them kiss, though the latest chapter ends with Itoshi crying and trying to strangle Tsumugi.
I have actually done the typesetting for a couple of the chapters as of current, so although it's not fully translated on our end there's a lot of things that happen even past the first volumethat are pretty interesting. I will try to refrain from direct spoilers, but I will say that the relationship between Itoshi and Tsumugi develops relatively quickly which is pretty surprising, since many yandere stories take a while before the couple gets together (see stories like My Yandere Neighbour for example). It's also really cool to see Tsumugi recognize and understand certain behaviors that Itoshi has as they are things that she herself had to deal with in her previous relationships and improve herself because of Itoshi. It's also incredibly fast how Tsumugi finds out that Itoshi is a yandere, literally two chapters in and the reasoning for why she accepts him is pretty solid the more we learn about her background and menhara tendencies.
In terms of yandere, what we see so far is pretty light, implying that Itoshi has been watching Tsumugi for a while, likely because they are neighbors, making it pretty easy for him to track where she's going. He's also pretty protective, immediately going to protect Tsumugi after being kicked out and almost calling the police on Shouma (at least until Tsumugi prevents that from happening). I can see Itoshi more as a bit emotional, as he seems to show a lot of expression and feelings towards Tsumugi even when not showing off his yandere form, as well as maybe a bit childish considering his reactions, though mature enough to know not to take advantage of Tsumugi's emotional vulnerability after she broke up (because boy would a lot of yanderes jump at that chance immediately). It does make me curious why he does that though, so he's probably much more of an respectful yandere (for lack of a better term) than we'd initially think, because again, a lot of yanderes would have just jumped at the opportunity to become their obsession's lover. Even past this, we later do see Itoshi become very possessive and jealous when it comes to Tsumugi later down the line and he can be protective over her as well, though compared to many other yanderes he's a lot more kinder and the couple strikes a good balance.
Personally, because of How to Train Your Handsome but Overbearing Boyfriend, I actually have taken a liking to yandere and menhara couplings since they work really well in terms of their desires. Menharas desire attention and yanderes love to give unlimited undivided attention to the person they love, so I think that this relationship will be similar where while they might run into some troubles, the two of their desires match up pretty well. Whether or not this will be some balance of unhealthy and healthy or just plain unhealthy is yet to be seen, but I think either way, I think that the story would be really fun to read and explore either or even both ideas.
Overall, a pretty good start to a manga series. This one is pretty lengthy actually, spanning around 14 volumes, so I'm sure there will be many situations for these two to get into and be able to properly develop their relationship.
#The Menhara Rabbit and the Yandere Wolf#male yandere#yandere#yandere boy#recommendations#manga#ongoing
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Eddie Gluskin Headcanons because I cannot stop thinking about him and im bored
Happy holidays, I usually just am not happy during this time of year so I’m pushing down my emotions and writing angst. Enjoy. Tw: Self harm, CSA, rape, misogyny, violence, typical outlast stuff.
-Eddie hates bathing and has to be physically restrained if the doctors wish to get him clean. This is mainly due to his CSA, as Eddie was attacked a lot while he was in the shower-but it is also due to him feeling uncomfortable with being nude for long periods of time.
-Eddie hates dogs. His family had a dog that was specifically trained to bite him if he commanded it to. Eddie doesn’t own any pets, really, and believes that cats are too “feminine” for him.
-During his initial murder spree, Eddie killed around 34 people-men and women, who he all gave the definition of “bride” to. He was found not guilty by reason of insanity, and was sent to Mount Massive Asylum. For a time, he actually had a proper psychologist before he was eventually signed up for the Walrider program after he attacked the wrong guard.
-Eddie has diagnosed Schizophrenia, BPD, psychosis, and could possibly qualify for a DID diagnosis.
-Eddie could possibly qualify for DID because he has a few seperate personality states: a younger version of himself, trapped within his childhood, “The Groom,” the dominant personality states, and a version of himself that is haunted by his trauma, and rather prefers to be alone. Though it is unclear if this is DID or just due to his BPD (he does dissociate from reality quite often, though).
-Eddie’s favorite movie growing up was Sleeping Beauty, and often quotes it to the best of his memory. He believes that Prince Phillip is the perfect depiction of a devoted husband, and Aurora is the most beautiful woman in the world.
-Sketching and tailoring are his favorite hobbies. He most often draws women in goregous dresses, and has a very traditional Disney-like style to his artwork.
-Eddie believes that it is the 1950s and is incapable of perceiving the current year as it is. He writes things like computers, camcorders, and cellphones off as “advanced space-age technology.” Don’t ever ask him to operate a computer because he would have absolutely no idea how to do it.
-If Eddie could comprehend the concept of a trans person, he would for sure be a supporter-due to his psychosis and delusions, however, he couldn’t comprehend it even if he tried. He can’t even comprehend that he may be gay.
-Eddie may have targeted women before the asylum, but once he was incarcerated, he practically exclusively targeted men-even when there was a female presence in the asylum, he didn’t attack them nearly as much as he did the men.
-Eddie is actually a pretty damn good chef. He has to be, considering his only qualification for a good “wife” is that “she” has to be alive and breathing. (Even then…)
-Eddie has a love for salted caramels.
-Eddie has a hard time keeping his anger in check, and rarely keeps his hands to himself. He was transferred to an isolation cell after he groped a guard, and he was never really allowed out of maximum security afterwards. This, plus other forms of inhumane treatment at the hands of Murkoff, eventually led to his mental health getting worse and his transfer to the Walrider program once it was deemed that he was “too far gone.”
-Eddie may be a charasmatic, boisterous man but deep down, he is suffering from crippling lonliness and deep seated insecurities that will likely never fully go away.
-Eddie did self harm before he was transferred to Mount Massive.
-Eddie’s best friend in the asylum is Frank Manera canonically, but he does have a rather good relationship with many of the Variants, including The Twins and Chris Walker. He and Frank used to have cells right next to one another, and communicated through a hole in the wall.
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Genuinely don't get how people forget about Trina so easily or undermine her in favour of literally anyone else. Like have you seen this woman. I'm a gay man and I would beg and plead for a chance with her oh my god. Smash.
#HI. EXPECT LONG TAGS:#This is very obviously a joke guys!!!!#okay??#Now that we all got that#i do think people forget about her really easily#or just focus on the parts that relate to Marvin or anyone else#like give her some love too!!!#she's such an interesting character#she never actually gets to be fully happy#sure she marries Mendel and she's happier#but he isn't an awesome husband at all#some of you are NOT ready for this conversation#TLDR: PAY SOME ATTENTION TO TRINA PLEASE!!!!!!!#And no#writing her off as “the mom”#or “Marvin's ex wife” doesn't count#that's just weird#THERE'S SO MUCH TO HER#PLEASE EXPLORE IT#all that said PLEASE ONE CHANCE TRINA I-#falsettos#trina falsettos#trina weisenbachfeld
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sss day my favorite national holiday WOOOOHHHH
bonus
#pokemon#trainer lyra#rival silver#soulsilvershipping#timeskip tag#bao beis#i had so much more planned. but alas. college.#ANYWAY. sss my everything. ohh. always thinking abt them.#this is very obviously lyra's room! all the pink! massive bed to fit all her pokemon! the champion paycheck gets you that much at least#and plants!!! no. 1 horticulturist in johto#she's living somewhere around the base of mt silver... decently close to the league and her hometown#so i like to imagine her with a huge greenhouse so she can take care of plants even in the harsher climate#meanwhile silver has one of those decrepit malelivingspace flats in viridian. he's making it work.#i can only see sss properly moving in together liiiike in their late 20s#after they get to enjoy young adult independence for a while#but before they permanently settle down they should go on silly adventures again... just once. or twice. or#as much as i like to entertain the thought of them being homebodies i think they'd rather spend their lives travelling haha#since silver never got to fully experience it as a kid on the run#being a wanted man and all#and lyra is itching for the getaway#they deserve to be in nature and responsibility-free and *frothing at the mouth*#BTW i put my whole wyvussy into that wall decor#lisia signed poster... rosa's resemblance as mei(!!!) in the totoro one... bell tower + whirl island pics //#pokemon constellations... and those gen 4 mail templates that no one actually used. probably from dawn. champion penpals :]#i debated doing a lance poster because celebrity idol funny but nah she'd bin that immediately after moving out#oh yeah the drawover was um. inspired by the nonebinary neochamp fit. so happy for my son.#i'm glad i managed to finish the big piece in time otherwise i would've just posted that LOL can you imagine#okey bye happy sss day
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if I had a nickel for every time I was in a fandom and a child character had a breakdown and did something that accidentally hurt another character, and then the fandom all turned on the character and vilified them because they [the fandom] can’t understand that sometimes 14 year olds make mistakes when they’re going through something traumatic, I would have 2 nickels
not a lot but it really is weird it happened twice
#This is targeted at anyone who vilifies Gon from hxh or Homura from pmmm#”Gon was manipulative towards Killua and took advantage of him” shut up shut the fuck up#”Homura never actually cared about any of the other girls she only cared about Madoka” never touch the internet ever again you absolute idi#I’m sorry that some of you incells can’t understand moral complexity or that characters can’t always be 100% good all the time#they were kids#they were only 14#At the same time saying stuff like this is actively undermining both Gon and Homuras characters but also Killua and Madokas as well#Killua and Gons friendship was kinda toxic from the beginning. They were each others first ever friends#and they didn’t really know how to have any#Gon was literally having a mental breakdown confronting the person who killed the closest thing he had ever had to a father#can you really blame him for lashing out???#And Homura#don’t get me started on the amount of idiots in the pmmm fandom who think she’s evil because he did what she thought was best for Madoka#she heard Madoka say she was unhappy being a god and how lonely she was and she took action#if she didn’t care about the other girls then WHY DID THE CLARA DOLLA DRAG THEM INTO HER LABYRINTH???#WHY DID SHE MAKE SURE THEY WERE ALL HAPPY WHEN SHE REWROTE THE UNIVERSE??#she tried for years to save Madoka just to fail when she made her final wish to become a god#imagine how she felt when she realized she wasn’t happy with that outcome either#when she realized she was all alone#she just wanted for her to be happy.#i swear to god#if you think either Gon or Homura are evil you might as well just block me now#because I fully believe you should not be allowed internet access#rant#rant post#pmmm#madoka magica#homura akemi#puella magi madoka magica#madoka kamane
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I don't think this is Moe's first offense (saying something brazen/flippant) but I do think it's the first time it's called the King a bitch. And it won't be the last! The funniest part of Anna being the one to take charge and chew Moe out is that it gives Moe the opportunity to do The Exact Same Thing to Alfonse one-on-one (you know... to test the waters... to see how he feels about it....). Which it is. Also promptly chastised for.
FAVE PANELS...
#fire emblem#feh#moe really is. a type of guy. it immediately gets scared when anna first corrects it. so what does it do? dig the hole deeper. double down.#THAT REALLY IS MOE'S BRAVE FACE.... playing dumb or getting oppositional. sometimes both.#but it is NOT confrontational... epitome of i'm just a little birthday boy. EXTREMELY annoying type of guy LMFAOOO#i feel like anna has been v patient w moe up until this point. like this has to be a three strikes you're OUT situation.#and both alfonse/sharena have been such hard working straight and narrow types that. they have never seen anna like that.#I REALLY THINK. it's like. anna is The Literal Commander Of A Military Unit and also given her background#more or less she could have been killed for having an attitude like that. hypothetically. we don't know her background. BUT THEORETICALLY..#i like to imagine it does come from a place of that though.#also moe may be an authority hating shithead but it does VERY quickly come to respect anna actually.#you have to Earn it. be Worthy of it. it sees that anna is extremely capable and skilled and fair. it respects that.#so like... i think it genuinely doesn't want to upset or disappoint her. however... it does have ... moe tendencies.#anyways even though i'm in between a dozen things i just had to draw this out and i'm so happy i did tbh#i don't really know how anna feels about moe. but it IS extremely funny to imagine moe is just torn asunder by her at one point#AND. IT FULLY DESERVED IT. it is taking the L here.#ALSO THE FACT THAT ALFONSE IS PISSED TOO. IT'S SO FUNNY TO ME. moe you just fucked up big time#IT WAS TRYING. TO BE NICE. 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#fe alfonse#sharena#fe anna#moe tag#summoner oc#my art#my comics#also that is. a whole other comic. moe committing the offense again and getting sternly corrected#until it's like ooooohhh. wait. you actually respect your dad... okay. um. let me think of something else to say#LMFAOOO... i think third time's a charm. it doesn't dare say that to sharena. what if she cries. moe is also gonna cry. and thrup
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I always point out Bunk’d on the list of shows with a terrible finale (since S3 was supposed to be the last but it effectively did kill the quality of the show) but having watched the final episodes of Bunk’d that aired last night, I can now actually reaffirm that its ending is shit.
Because oh my god is it shit.
#Bunk’d#Jessie#disney channel#disney sitcom#Disney#lou hockhauser#Camp kikiwaka#I think I owe The Lion Guard and Jake and the Never Land Pirates an apology for their finales#Don’t get me wrong they’re still absolute garbage but I don’t think I felt as burnt out and empty with those finales as I did with this one#Lou gets a random-ass love interest in the last 2 episodes and they pull a soap-opera style fake-out break up#which is like#I have no reason to care this late into the game#but they also rehash the plotline of the characters possibly separating and Lou wondering if she should stay a camp director#As if we haven’t had that plotline used in the last 4 seasons (including the season that was SUPPOSED to be the end)#Again no reason to give a shit#Especially since the status quo remains with Lou staying at the camp#The Ross kids are barely acknowledged or mentioned despite the show originally centering around them#And rather emotional closure that wraps up the loose ends with the series-original characters that were written off the show#and got no closure#instead they pull a Descendants with a dance party ending that doesn’t even fully fade to black by the end#Like what the fuck#My expectations for the series were low because any chance at a ‘good ending’ were thrown out the window with every renewal this show got#But oh my god this finale actually lowered my already low expectations#For years I’ve affirmed that Bunk’d is the perfect example as to why shows should just stay dead after they’ve ended#because if they don’t they can just become a rotting shell of what they’ve used to be and lose any and all quality beyond salvation#which is exactly what happened#And by consequence I am only happy BECAUSE the show ended and not in HOW it ended#But yeah the Jessie franchise is dead and so is Bunk’d lol
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fuck
#like idk i never realized just how bad she hurt me. i didnt even rly realize she hurt me at all#bc there are so so so many ways she sldve reacted so much worse. but like i never thought someone cld just straight up ignore it.#like i get the way i told her was dumb and confusing. ok. i can understand that. whatever#but idk. she said she wished my sister had told her years earlier so that she cldve helped her back then#but then suddenly it's different when it's me. suddenly it's 'but youve always been my little girl' and 'oh i dont know that sounds dangerou#s' and 'are you sure?' and 'how long have you felt like this'#well it's been almost 5 fucking years now and it hasnt changed. i havent changed. fuck#i trusted her. i trusted her to be there for me and to support me and to accept me and she threw it back in my face and never even blinked#i can never ever trust her again and she doesnt care. she doesnt even know bc shes so wrapped up in all the fucking lies she tells herself#fuck. she did everything wrong. fuck. i can never fully trust anyone with this part of me again bc of her#and it's awful bc it's such an important part of me. it brings me so much joy and i think on it often and i love myself for it#but it's just simmering in my chest and every time i think of letting it hit air again i freeze bc i thought it was safe once and it WASNT.#i wanted to get my name changed before high school. i wanted to start the medical process. i wanted all the thing i thought shed do for me.#my wants and my understanding of my identity has changed now but it still hurts.#it hurts so bad to see other ppl my age get all of that and to have the support of their family and to not be afraid to put a name to it all#im happy for them. but it's so awful hearing her point those ppl out w no self awareness like oh thats so good for them isnt that sweet#I AM RIGHT HERE! YOU COULD BE DOING ALL OF THAT! I NEEDED YOU TO BE THAT FOR ME!#and every time she does acknowledge it she gets it completely wrong or it's just to bemoan how little she understands#'oh everyones changing their name now its so confusing' 'im really trying i dont know what else you want from me' NO YOURE NOT! YOURE NOT!#YOUVE NEVER BEEN WILLING TO TRY. NOT FOR ME.#you never fucking loved me you loved the idea of what you thought i would be and you cant fucking let it go even when the truth is staring#you dead in the face. fuck. you complain about how i 'hate you' or 'think youre stupid' well maybw treat me with an ounce of respect and act#like you understand the things youve EXPLICITLY BEEN TOLD. even a little.#but honestly it's too late. if she were to suddenly have a change of heart now i wouldnt give a damn.#the damage is done you dont get to have this part of me and act like youre such a good and supportive mother.#i cant even say i hate her. i love her but shes hurt me more than anyone else ever has and i can never trust her to actually love me or even#fucking see me or support anything about me that actually matters to me#i dont know. i dont know. thinking about it again.#ive thought abt telling my dad. not bc it wld do any good but bc ik he values honesty and maybe hed throw me a 'damn that sucks'#my sister said this is something i have to fight on but she doesnt get it. i have no ground to stand on as far as shes concerned
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I just found out what happens to dabi at the end of mha. Don’t talk to me.
#personal*#jess talks#mha spoilers#when I say I can’t stop crying. I mean it.#he’s still alive technically but he’s only predicted to last a few more days#he spoke to all his family too#but the part that broke me was shoto asking what his favourite food was#and finding out they both love soba😭😭😭#I’m fuckin… in hysterics#now my brain is like ‘finalise rins story!!!’#but I’m over here struggling to cope with all this#1000% she gets to go see him#like fully bound and no allowed to move but she’s allowed to visit him#cus I predict fuyumi/shoto see the decency in her and know she’s not at fault for what her family made her do#so she’s deffo in prison for a long time#but they let her visit toya#and part of me is tempted to make some changes and get Eri to save him#BUT I honestly don’t know how I feel about that rn#like realistically I know he will die#and that makes the most sense#but if they can have a little longer I would want that😭#they were never gonna get a happy ending that’s for sure#but closure would be enough#maybe a little love confession or something#just an acknowledgment that they did actually love each other#and that /maybe/ she could redeem herself#after all the heroes and cops know she was doing them a favour by wiping out her rivals#but she’s still a villain#and it was take AT LEAST a decade before she would agree to ‘help’ the good guys#like deffo still a crime lord - but an organised one maybe?
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discovered miah_pie on t*ktok (<- i don’t have one btw i just stumbled upon her bc someone i follow on ig talked abt her) and her videos make me want to cry so bad. 24 year old dependent moment
#purrs#i went to a clothing store today to try to get new work shoes and pants bc the one pair i have of each literally have holes in them and are#falling the fuck apart on my body and it was a HORRIBLE experience largely bc i think everybody in town was out shopping for back to school#so it was super crowded and there were lots of screaming kids and it was extremely stressful + my dad got into a mini car accident while i w#was in the store (he was / is completely fine thankfully but the car is not which is so awesome 😍😍😍😍😍) and i was just so stressed and#overstimulated but also like… nothing fits me bc im so short lol. but anyway it was so horrible i was on the verge of starting to cry in the#store and then i came home empty handed and my mom got super pissed at me for… needing to go to the store / being the reason we were out lol#and then finding miah pie and her videos are all about making trips to the store SO much fun and buying little treats and saying yessir and#OHHHHHH MYYYYY and just finding the joy in smth that can be so stressful and unpleasant… it makes me want to cry happy and sad tears at the#same time like i want that soooo bad and i can’t do it fully yet but i want it. need it. fuck my stupid baka life#anyways im gonna start saying the stuff she says just to make myself feel better even when im not at a store. yessir! OHHHHHH MYYYYYY.#acquired. don’t mind if i diddly dooooo!#also btw i am not a dependent except for the ways i am a dependent. hope that helps 🫶🏻#the problem is really that i don’t have a car or a license and also that my mom throws a fit every time i need / want to get driving#practice bc it’s never a good time so. lol 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍 me doing drivers ed this summer was a fucking joke i forget literally everything i#learned and have only been behind the wheel 3 times and none of them have actually counted bc im just developing basic motor skills#(literally). fmlllll im never getting out of here who am i kidding 🤪#delete later
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I don't talk about them nearly enough (bc unfortunately I'm a C.orrin/O.din stan bc I married his dumbass my first conquest run) but I have SUCH fondness for O.din and K.agero because she's one of the small handful of people who never?? Makes fun of him?? And she plays along with him?? She insists on painting his parents if they're to be married even though he's orphaned??
#im shaking them actually#support chains where o.wain/o.din is never mocked my rare rare beloved#so many people are so mean to my boy and im shaking them all#( ooc ; christina rambles )#shes one of the mothers who make sense in that in o.phelia support#where her mom is lile 'yeah cause im a chosen one too duh'#like k.agero fully went along with him calling the engagement ring some lofty ridiculous name#'give me the binding of eternal happiness' or whatever and he gets sO TOUCHED#dont mind me I'm talking ships with nick#im generally biased to whoever i got together first but i love many many ships
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hi, i'm the anon who fell in love from before, and it's totally alright to post it! i'm very glad that you're feeling a little more at ease, and your well wishes mean a lot. thank you so much, too. i'm happy i got to say it to someone <3
I remembered I had this waiting too !! ;v; I actually got so occupied with family stuff I didn't get time to look at this properly (aside from the ok) until monday where we got new vaccine shots at work and it helped me think about smth else all over again so thank you again! ;v; and I'm happy that you enjoyed saying it too!
#I'm intentionally grabbing as many vaccines as I can bc 1) just in case and 2) to spite my antivaxer lab partner#but bad with needles I remain... or bad with the knowledge smth was just added to my arm I guess...#I thought I was doing so good distracting myself with conversation with coworkers except the nurse had to shout at me to breathe xjsifbdi#I've never actually fallen in love but it always sounds rly nice !!!#I had a close experience once a rly long time ago but I was so comfortable in our friendship I never rly felt a need to do much...#I remember thinking that if she brought it up I would grab the opportunity but otherwise everything was also good as it was#she confessed to me later on but by then I felt like we had grown apart#I sometimes wonder if it was better for us to never pursue anything so it was easier to grow apart naturally#or if we wouldnt have grown apart at all if things were different#either way I'm contentish with where I am in life so I don't regret anything#anyway I used you to reflect a bit myself I hope that was ok#I am typing this out fully expecting her to never see it but just in case I might delete it later haha#anyway!! even if I don't fully understand the feelings myself it always makes me so happy to see the happiness it brings others#I'm old enough ppl around me are getting engaged now and it feels so wonderful every time !!!
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hachi choosing to be with takumi 'cause he's an impossible man.. he can never break her heart worse than all the men before him have, and she knows damn well she could never break his..
#guys ive never been happy reading this manga. ive been miserable since the beginning but i cant stop reading#dont even get me started about shin .. guys i cant believe i going to say this but for the first time in my life i have the urge to murder#a woman#SHIN IS A KID. HE WAS FIFTEEN#and the fact that everyone's fully aware of what's happening and not doing anything to stop it#shin you are an angel on earth.. i need to be friends with him so i can tell him he's loved#back to hachi.. she has toxic man syndrome and she cant help it#i understand why everyone dislikes her but i actually really love her so much and i cant help but root for her#she just wants to be loved at the end of the day ...#i cant help but feel that the reason she rejected nobu (apart from her just not liking him that much) was because she was too much#- of a wreck to want to be with someone who isnt a wreck.#i thought this was a funny cute happy lesbian story and instead i was met with tragedy pain suffering and NO LESBIANS?#im on volume 6 so lets hope it goes up from here (it will not)#00
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because sometimes there are invisible tests and invisible rules and you're just supposed to ... know the rule. someone you thought of as a friend asks you for book recommendations, so you give her a list of like 30 books, each with a brief blurb and why you like it. later, you find out she screenshotted the list and send it out to a group chat with the note: what an absolute freak can you believe this. you saw the responses: emojis where people are rolling over laughing. too much and obsessive and actually kind of creepy in the comments. you thought you'd been doing the right thing. she'd asked, right? an invisible rule: this is what happens when you get too excited.
you aren't supposed to laugh at your own jokes, so you don't, but then you're too serious. you're not supposed to be too loud, but then people say you're too quiet. you aren't supposed to get passionate about things, but then you're shy, boring. you aren't supposed to talk too much, but then people are mad when you're not good at replying.
you fold yourself into a prettier paper crane. since you never know what is "selfish" and what is "charity," you give yourself over, fully. you'd rather be empty and over-generous - you'd rather eat your own boundaries than have even one person believe that you're mean. since you don't know what the thing is that will make them hate you, you simply scrub yourself clean of any form of roughness. if you are perfect and smiling and funny, they can love you. if you are always there for them and never admit what's happening and never mention your past and never make them uncomfortable - you can make up for it. you can earn it.
don't fuck up. they're all testing you, always. they're tolerating you. whatever secret club happened, over a summer somewhere - during some activity you didn't get to attend - everyone else just... figured it out. like they got some kind of award or examination that allowed them to know how-to-be-normal. how to fit. and for the rest of your life, you've been playing catch-up. you've been trying to prove that - haha! you get it! that the joke they're telling, the people they are, the manual they got- yeah, you've totally read it.
if you can just divide yourself in two - the lovable one, and the one that is you - you can do this. you can walk the line. they can laugh and accept you. if you are always-balanced, never burdensome, a delight to have in class, champagne and glittering and never gawky or florescent or god-forbid cringe: you can get away with it.
you stare at your therapist, whom you can make jokes with, and who laughs at your jokes, because you are so fucking good at people-pleasing. you smile at her, and she asks you how you're doing, and you automatically say i'm good, thanks, how are you? while the answer swims somewhere in your little lizard brain:
how long have you been doing this now? mastering the art of your body and mind like you're piloting a puppet. has it worked? what do you mean that all you feel is... just exhausted. pick yourself up, the tightrope has no net. after all, you're cheating, somehow, but nobody seems to know you actually flunked the test. it's working!
aren't you happy yet?
#almost wrote the champagne line as ''effervescent'' but legit could not write it without saying ''effervescent like a snail''#ah tumblr...#writeblr#warm up#idk . having trouble writing rn#ps i don't like to talk about it . it is my medical information. but before you ask. yes this is about being on the spectrum#i really don't like when ppl make my writing about how im [whatever ID]. i want it to ring true for the people who it rings true for#i don't want it to be like ''awwwww look at this person!!! she's the EXCEPTION!!! :)" .....#no.... not really.....#idk something gross happens whenever i admit to certain conditions and i turn into like inspiration p*rnography#like yes they actually let us use keyboards these days#furthermore i just... dont feel comfortable talking about this part of me. i had too bad of a childhood. adhd is one thing...#this one im like. still coming to terms with. which is like. my own journey.#idk. just please be kind. some things are more private than others. this one feels private to me.#i do not know how to help others w/this . and i do not know how to help myself. i will talk about it if im ever ready. idk if that will#actually ever happen#ty in advance i love u im kissing you we are kissing somewhere on the spectrum
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