#she just yelled at the NICEST most KIND guy in this place that helps everyone with everything

[rose-colored-something]

U know that one coworker that you love as a friend and think they’re lovely but they suck so fucking bad at their job that it physically hurts u

[jadedxrealityw]

-Truth Or Dare- Pansy Parkinson x Female Reader

    ☼-☪-☼

   Kody: Happy Lesbian Visibility Day!

   Movie/Show: Harry Potter 

   House and Year:  Slytherin / 7th year

   Request: Good morning/night! Hope you’re having a lovely day and make sure to drink water ! Can you write a Pansy x Fem!reader where they’re playing truth or dare and get dared to makeout in front of the people they’re playing with 

   Possible Triggers / Warnings: cursing, makeout, slytherin’s being dumbasses, if you don’t like girls kissing unfollow me please, 

    ☼-☪-☼

   slytherin’s were considered the most poised and proper house since most came from wealthy pure-blood families who acted like they were born with a stick up there ass. To everyone else the house of Slytherin was also the rudest people alive.

   those people have never been in your friend group clearly. 

   it was true, most of you came from wealth, but you also had shitty, racist, probably homophobic parents. It was the main thing that brought you together, the fact no one else knew what you had to go through just so you weren’t written out of an will or disowned. 

   it sounded shallow to most outsiders, but you needed the money to start your own life and finally be free to do what you want without the constant reminder from your parents about how to act, what to wear, who to hang out with, how to be a proper lady and all that bullshit. It was suffocating.

   enough of the emotional shit. It was a godsend that school year’s at Hogwarts were as long as they were because it meant you had all the time in the world to hangout with your best friends. Draco Malfoy, Blaise Zabini, Theodore Nott, and Pansy Parkinson. 

   Draco was the biggest hot head you knew and easily offended, but he also had a big heart under all that angst. When he attached to someone it was impossible to get rid of him. He clung onto all of you like a lifeline and even if he’s a little overbearing you loved him all the same. 

   Blaise was a calm collected fellow, very sarcastic and condescending sometimes. He talked so proper you couldn’t tell if he was insulting you really. Like Draco he also had a big heart, but would never ever show it unless you was with with Theo and to Theo only.

   speaking of Nott. Theo was the ultimate loner avoided all of you for your first year of Hogwarts, then he met Blaise and they connected very well. You all thought it was funny when Theo would be all quiet around you and suddenly light up like a star when Blaise walked into the room.

   he was like that with all of you now though

   and Pansy. She was the embodiment of ‘fuck you and your mom’ kind of person. She took no ones shit and you admired her for that. She was also a giant flirt towards you and only you. Compliment your looks, body, anything really. You thought of it as a joke t first and casually flirted back.

   you suppose Pansy saw that as an invitation to try something more. She’d randomly place her hand somewhere on you and trace random shapes in agonizing slow patterns. A tease at it’s finest. There were also the sides of her you found comforting. 

   you were always prone to panic attacks, something that developed from your parents nonetheless. She would always cradle your face and make sure you were breathing just fine or slip you chocolate frogs randomly because she knew you liked sweets. 

   she was your best friend, but with time your feelings changed and every little thing she did set fire through you like no other. Your heart would start beating so fast you were afraid she would hear it if she got to close. Sometimes you wished she did

   unbeknownst to you Draco, Blaise, and Theo all knew both you and Pansy liked each other and were both pussyfooting around your feelings. Pansy always thought she wasn’t good enough for you and you on the other hand thought that she just didn’t like you like that at all.

   the boy’s were adamant to see you two together

    ☼-☪-☼

   every other friday night all of you would crowd into Pansy’s room to have a sleepover- well you stopped calling it that after fourth year because Blaise said it was to immature for your guy’s age. He shut up real quick after Pansy said he wasn’t invited then. 

   each of you had your sacred tasks bestowed upon you if you wanted to be allowed entry to the dark cave that was Pansy Parkinson’s private dorm. Draco was in charge of getting butterbeer, Theo got sweets, Blaise had to collect extra pillows and blankets for you all to sleep on.

   and you and Pansy would watch idly as they ran round for said things. 

   “Finally, only took you three an hour” Pansy taunted as the three Slytherin boys walked through the door “Your not the one sneaking butterbeer into the dorms at two in the morning you lazy ass” Draco snapped back, holding the case of glass bottles in his hand. 

   Theo set the basket of sweets on Pansy’s trunk that was at the foot of her bed so he could help Blaise set up the blankets on the floor “Yeah shove off” she waves her hand before falling back onto the bed “Where’s Y/n? Is she not coming? She’s okay right?” BLaise asked, looking around the room.

   Pansy had to hold back a fit of laughter “She’s in the bathroom changing. Your dad is showing by the way” she snickers. Blaise scoffs and goes back to putting down the pillows.  “Why does she need to change?” Theo spoke up, taking a seat on a pillow.

   a grin made its way to Pansy’s face “Spilled some water on her clothes- she spilled water on her clothes” she quickly corrects herself. Draco narrows his eyes and looks at Blaise who gives him a knowing look. “Right” Draco says, knowing full well what happened. 

   the bathroom door opened and Pansy sat up quickly. You walked out, running a hand through your hair as the Slytherin girl eyed you up and down, unable to hide her grin at her shorts and matching black shirt on your body. “Hey Sexy” Pansy sends you a wink. 

   fuck

   you have learned to tone down your emotions around her, but still- “Hey” you reply simply nad go over to sit at the foot of the bed “Sorry for the wait” you say and they shake their heads “It’s fine, want some butterbeer?” Draco asked and you nod rapidly. 

   Draco begins to distribute the butterbeer amongst you all and that's when the chatting started. Pansy sat behind you and wrapped her arms around your waste, one hand holding her bottle of butter beer and the other wrapped tightly around you. 

   at one point she slid her hand up your shirt, stopping at your belly button to rub the cold metal of her ring along your skin. It made you choke on your butterbeer a bit and cough up “Are you alright?” Blaise asked and you nodded quickly, pointing to your throat “Went down the wrong pipe”

   Blaise seemed to believe your answer or faked it well because he went back to talking to Theo.

    ☼-☪-☼

   an hour later

   you all had pretty much devoured most of the sweets and were out of topics to talk about though Pansy could continue to insult Draco’s hair until her dying breath. “I’m fucking bored” Pansy whined, laying her head on your shoulder. Y/n.Exe has stopped working.

   “Not my damn problem” Draco retorts, popping a flavour bean into his mouth. You exhale, shaking your head. Weren’t your friends just the nicest people alive. “Good thing i didn’t fucking ask you then huh Malfoy!?” Pansy shouts. Blaise copies your previous actions and sighs.

   he reached up to rub his temples “May we not yell for the sake of my head and Theo’s” he says. Pansy was about to go in one Blaise when you spoke up “Yah, your yelling in my ears Pans” Draco shot her a smirk, knowing she wouldn’t yell after that. 

   Pansy flips him off with a grin “Sit and spin on it” she mouths to him and he just shoots her a glare “We could play truth to dare, heard a couple Hufflepuff girls talking about it. They said it was fun” Theo cut in, looking at his hands. Blaise’s face scrunched up a bit t the idea, but he didn’t say anything. 

   “Yes- your mine bitch” Pansy lets out a maniacal laugh as she points at Draco who looked more weirded out then scared “I’ll play since Theo is, what about you Y/n?” Blaise questioned. You shrug your shoulders “Sure, i’m always down to try things once”

   Pansy’s face lights up “Thank you babes. Now who goes first?” she asked. Blaise lifted his wand nd tapped the empty Butterbeer bottle, causing it to levitate “Pansy, spin it” he says. She shrugs and reaches over your shoulder to spin the bottle. 

   it took a couple seconds before it landed on the Slytherin prince himself. Draco scoffed, rolling his eyes “Fuck my life” he muttered as Pansy gave him a sickenly sweet smile “Draco, truth or dare prick” she said, keeping her wide smile. Draco looked like he was weighing his options in his mind. 

   “Truth”

   “What house did you want to be in when you were ten?” She asked. What a weird question. Draco’s face darkened s if he had seen a boggart, before he scowled “You fucking bitch” he seethed making you snicker a bit as well as Theo. “Say it~” she says in a sing song voice. 

   “Fine!” he shouts and takes a deep breath, crossing his arms like an angry child “I wanted to be in Gryffindor, like Harry Potter” the room was silent for a moment as you all stared at him blankly “Loser” Pansy laughs and he throws his arms in the air. 

   “I hate you”

   “Okay cool it Gryffindor” BLaise interjected, making all of you snicker. Draco narrowed his eyes at his mate “Your laughing now Zabini, just wait until i get you and your fucked” he threatens, but Blaise doesn’t have an reaction “Right...good luck with that”

   Draco spins the bottle and you all watch as it spins around for a couple seconds until it stops on the one and only Blaise Zabini “Well shit” he says with a deadpan look. Pansy gasped and covered her mouth “I can’t believe dad just cursed in front of us” she mutters to you, making you smile. 

   “Truth or dare Zabini?” Draco asked, a evil smirk on his face. Sometimes you forgot you were surrounded by Slytherin’s and your friends were assholes. “Dare since i’m not a pussy unlike my fellow housemates” Blaise grins, making Draco shake his head. 

   “Tell Theo you love him...in front of us”

   now Blaise wasn’t one for PDA and neither was Theo, probably one of the reasons they fit so well together. Draco was a dick for this one “I choose truth” he said instantly. You look at Theo who’s half smile turned into a grin. What was he planning? His face drops to a frown and he looks at Blaise.

   “You don’t love me?” he asked, his lip quivering a bit. What in the? All of you looked at Theo as Blaise stared at his boyfriend in shock “What?! No of course i do!” Blaise protests, but Theo doesn’t break from his character “Then say it” he persits. 

   all of you were stunned into silence, even loud mouth Pansy. Blaise looked like he was going to breakdown, which was an interesting look on his face actually “I- uh- what? I-” ne sputters, not knowing how to answer. Theo looks down at his lap “It’s fine i get it” he replies.

   he starts to sniffle, to make Blaise think he was crying which seemed to push - him over the edge. He grabs Theo’s face and makes him look at him “Oh my- i love you Theo. I’m in love with you. What has gotten into you?” he asked rapidly. Theo finally breaks and gives him a tired smile. 

   “I love you too. Who’s next?” he says, breaking away from Blaise who looked like he just went through all five stages of grief and is deciding to go through it all a second time. “Damn- that's tough” Pansy says, breaking the tension “Fuck you” Blaise snaps instantly making you all go wide eyed.

   you guys needed a dad swear jar

   Blaise huffs and spins the bottle, his usual smile with bad intentions coming back to his face once it lands on Pansy, who just sighs, mumbling some curses under her breath “Pans, truth or dare?” he asked. Pansy eyed him with a glare before smiling “Dare” she says. 

   you knew it was a bad idea

   “I dare you to make out with Y/n” he said casually, causing you to choke on your butterbeer “Excuse me!?” you interject “I didn’t laugh at you!” he shrugs his shoulders “Your just collateral damage Y/n, very sorry” he says. but you knew he wasn’t.

   “This is bullshit” you mutter, though the thought was making your heartbeat against your chest. Pansy shrugs nonchalantly before using her hand to tilt your head up so you were looking t the ceiling. This way she could reach you since she was sat behind you.

   Pansy leans down and plants her lips onto yours, leaving you shocked. You lose your grip of your butterbeer, causing it to fall, but Theo catches it. Pansy Parkinson was kissing you, the girl you fell in love with. This wasn’t a teasing touch or flirty comment. It was the real thing.

   and you loved it

   you reach up to put your hand on the nape of her neck to pull her in for  deeper kiss, feeling her grin against your lips. As you both got more heated the boys slowly left the room, leaving you two alone to do whatever the hell really. Good thing too, because it was only going to go further. 

   Pany’s free hand reaches up to wrap round your neck, not squeezing, but just gripping firmly to keep you in place. Fuck. Her tongue ran along your bottom lip and you opened your mouth slightly for her to slip her tongue in and connect it with yours.

   you always forget she has tongue ring

   it was nice to latch onto, hearing Pansy moan into your mouth was an added plus as well. You guessed Pansy was fed up with the current position because she pulled away and pushed you roughly back onto the bed, pulling your legs so you were closer to her.

   she leaned down, hovering over you “I should probably tell you i’m in love with you before anything else happens” hse spoke, a wide smile spreading across her face “Why?” you asked. “because- answer the question Y/n, do you love me too?” she spoke, you could tell she was getting anxious. 

   “Of course i love you. I have for a long time” you say, matching her smile “You're telling me i could have been kissing you like this sooner?” she asked with a small pout. You reach up and loop your arms around her neck “Then let’s not waste anymore time then huh?”

   Pansy grins before kissing you again. 

    ☼-☪-☼

   Click Here To Join My Taglist!

   @the--queen-of-hell @sonbelleame @dracosathenaeum @spaceconstellationss @marrymetheonott 

    ☼-☪-☼

   Kody: How come every Pansy fic i write so far is just really horny? Anyways, i haven’t slept yet and peace!

[huenjin]

𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐘 𝐊𝐈𝐃𝐒 𝐓𝐄𝐋𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐈𝐑 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐒 𝐀𝐁𝐎𝐔𝐓 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐈𝐑 𝐒/𝐎 (𝐎𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐌 𝐅𝐈𝐍𝐃𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐎𝐔𝐓)

genre | fluff, toothbiting fluff, and slightly suggestive

warnings | hints at nsfw in slight occasions, but it's still very sfw.

members | bang chan, minho, changbin, hyunjin, jisung, felix, seungmin, jeongin

note | tried at making it gender neutral. also, this is my first hc, if this is what it is, so please do tell me if it's any good.

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐍

downright going to be the most classic one. he'd bring you over for a christmas dinner, his mum and dad looking at you quizzically and you swear to god it was the most raveling moment ever in your whole life. the fear, the anxiety and the pain of being rejected by his parents weighs far too much in your head. however, chan would hold your hand, rub small circles at the junction between your thumb and your other fingers and tell his parents that you're his bestfriend, his lover, the one he loves in the present and hopefully for a long time. that he wants to spend his christmas with every single human being that he loves under the same roof. it is only after this that his parents calm down, cheer up and are overjoyed that their son has found someone to be with — to share his happiness and sadness with. will go down in your history as one of the best christsmases you have shared.

𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐇𝐎

here to spread the college boyfriend!minho agenda. this was off this ad that i saw the other day and idek why i found it cute but it was dead cute and i knew that's definitely minho. 100%. so you're over at his lodging room in college in his shirt — minho swears to god he finds you the cutest in his shirts — watching this romcom on netflix on his laptop. you're cuddled up against him on his bed and minho's kissing your cheeks occasionally when you're too engrossed into the movie, making sure he gets the gasp and the chuckle exactly from you. and all was going well till he gets a video call notification from his mother and he's scrambling up from his bed, angling the mirror away from you as he answers, "hi, mom." his mother would ask of him to show his new room, something he was supposed to do earlier and he sighs, "can we do this tomorrow? it's late and i have this assignment to do?" but his mother wouldn't have it any other way and insists — determination running through their family veins evidently. and here you are, scrambling around his room everytime he moves to show his room to his mum, just to avoid the camera. until you can sit back on the bed and minho's rushing to end the conversation, "can i please go do my assignments now, mum?" you know you're royally fucked when minho's mother laughs, only to ask her son, "does your assignment wear your shirts now? you should introduce them to me."

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐁𝐈𝐍

changbin's whole family knows you already. in fact, if anything, it was his sister that forced him to finally ask you out because he has been crushing on you forever. the following events happen in this particular order: you're the cute cashier at his favorite drink place and if college has taught him one thing, it is never to miss out on an opportunity and he knows he must ask you out. his sister is with him and finds him all awe eyed at you and she knows. she also knows that her brother is a wimp and won't ask you out so she nags him over throwing litter all over in his room if he doesn't. changbin thinks it's the extra push he needed and he does ask you out while paying his bill — a mere, "uhm, i think you're cute. if you happen to have some, uh, free time this saturday evening, we could go watch a movie or something. oh, i mean, of course, if only you're free and if you haven't watched the movie and like everyone seems to be busy and you're just so so pretty i ha—" changbin still remembers the way you giggled, the way you held your chest and the way you smiled and nodded. changbin's family knows that very evening because siblings are snitches deep down and his sister yells as soon as she enters the home, even before she has taken her shoes off — "listen, listen! our changbinnie grew up. guess who has a lover, guess who, guess who!" all changbin could yell back was, "they are prettier than you and nicer than you!" and stick his tongue out. needless to say, changbin was found picking scrap paper off his room's floor at 2am.

𝐇𝐘𝐔𝐍𝐉𝐈𝐍

lowkey his parents are suspicious of you and think you're not a great person and this is another episode of hwang hyunjin getting overly attached and loving another human. you can't blame them. experiences make parents cautious and when all of hwang hyunjin's relationship has ended him with an aching heart, you know you'd be suspicious of the next person he brings home too. he brings you home for dinner and his parents were definitely not expecting another member. it starts with frigid stares and hard, short answers and hyunjin has to hold your hand to stop you from crying because you feel like you lost your chance even before you had it. that is till, hyunjin speaks up, "mum, dad. i love them. and i know you guys are doing this because you fear they're going to break my heart—" "i wouldn't," you mumble, "you're going to break mine if this ends." and hyunjin chuckles, kissing your cheek before his parents. he turns to them and repeats the same, "i love them. so much and i hope you can accept them and not pin all my bad experiences on them. please." it takes a few more meetings for his parents to warm up to you but it happens slowly over the time, till — you're now spending every other weekend with his mum to bake cakes.

𝐉𝐈𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐆

so jisung, as much as he needs the caring and loving, is an eccentric man. he's so eccentric you're so sure you fell for him because of that, because of how he manages to make you always smile. so eccentric that he had a whole ppt presentation on why everyone should be like you. and this stupid boyfriend who is oh so in love shows this before his parents to announce how he's dating you. it's like a one slide presentation. he's planned it all out for days. he'll bring you over in the guise of being a friend and then surprise his parents after dinner by turning this great one slide presentation on. it'll have a picture of you on the side and points in bullets to the left — of how you're pretty, of how you're funny, how you make him want to be a better person, how he wants to continue going to the orphanage to help every sunday with you, how he wants to give you his world. how you're the nicest person he knows. your parents are smiling and they know. they know even before the announcement that you're his lover and better half and you make him happy and so does he. and courtesy of jisung's great brain, the animations rotate and land and the last two lines are so big that you blush and are embarrassed but god fucking help you, you're so in love with him that this makes your heart race. "be like y/n. be my lover," races into the screen and you think the animations makes it even more quirkier than it already is. until his mother makes everyone laugh even more by asking, "are you asking us all out, sungie? doubt they would like that."

𝐅𝐄𝐋𝐈𝐗

another one of the classic introduction types. felix asks you if it's alright for him to finally introduce you to his family and you nod, heart fluttering because you know for sure this is a huge step. upon much consideration, you agree to go for dinner with his parents at his place the following weekend. you're asking him over the week if this dress was alright or if you should go for formals and as much as he reassures you that it's not a huge deal — it is a huge deal to you. you want his parents to know how serious you are of him. you even being a gift home that night and bake some muffins and his mother is just really impressed (if she wasn't already flustered by all the stuff you brought). and when you know you have warned up enough to them, you know his mother is going to show the embarassing pictures just to fluster her son and it works. you do spend some good hours with his parents — his dad giving you a thumbs up to be new fashioned as you leave and his mum waving you good bye — and it is only after this you sigh in relief, tension off your shoulders. you've left a good impression and felix knows this too as he kisses you in his car.

𝐒𝐄𝐔𝐍𝐆𝐌𝐈𝐍

seungmin is the softest boyfriend ever. i mean seriously, if the whole world already didn't know the two of you were dating would be a surprise — it's the pretty bracelets you wear, the matching hoodies found in your closets or how you're just always in his blue hoodie. always. and so when seungmin is rushing you, two weeks into official dating for you to meet his parents, you're wide eyed. all he has to say is, "i'll be going to marry you either way. why wait till the day before marriage to show you off to my parents also." and he'd be so thrilled. seungmin's mum is enthralled because he is enthralled. he is so excited to tell his parents about you and about how you're his lover. his to show off. his to love. for years to comes. and you're blushing in front of his parents, ears heated up at the term. seungmin's dad jokingly pats his son's back, laughing, "have you grown up already to bring someone home?" and he nods, smiling like the dork you fell in love with. his mother rushes to sit you down by the table, ready to take care of you and you realise — seungmin's family will always be as accepting as he is. the fruit doesn't fall that far away from the tree, after all.

𝐉𝐄𝐎𝐍𝐆𝐈𝐍

trust me, he's the reckless kind. he'll care for you, love for you and be there for you but he's so bad with dates and timings and everything that mistakes like this were bound to happen at one point. he's shifted to his own place and jeongin is so excited that he calls you over — "y/n, you must come here. even the bed is warm." and you know what that meant. the bane of every mankind's downfall and every civilization's achilles' hill. that is exactly how you ended up next to jeongin, his hands cupping your face and him kissing you like he has all the time in the world now that he has his own place. until the two of you hear the door click and jeongin pulls back, swearing and in panic. you hold his shoulder in worry and he's telling you that his parents were supposed to come over, today. that he didn't know it would be this early, however. and the only thing his oh-so-bright brain could come up with in that moment is to shove you and himself into the small closet till his parents leave. and even if it meant a few sweaty minutes in the closets in each other's warmth, moans and giggles in the air albeit the warning of silence, and jeongin kissing you in places the heavens shouldn't know, you'll happily brace it all for him. the two of you come out of the closet only after you hear the door shut again. the two of you walk down carefully to see if his parents are away, only to find a small yellow post it note stuck on the fridge — you should have told us you had someone over. you bury your face into his shoulders in embarassment as you ask, "they heard, didn't they?" he chuckles, "probably. we'll get you to officially meet then soon. my mum loves pies and you bake the best ones. she'll fall for you like i did. instantly."

[julie-thefatones]

Ghost of You || Luke X Reader || Part 1

Hello everyone!! welcome to my first Fanfic pretty much.... im really nervous about posting it, and really hope you guys like it! Im going to warn you that there are some punctuation mistakes, and probably some misspelled words, and run on sentences... but nobodies perfect eh? lol anyways Enjoy! please let me know what you think, I am already writing part 2 so if this goes well ill post that soon :)

A/N: Your best friends with Julie, since the stamp was removed from the boys they are able to be seen by lifers at choice and can touch lifers at choice, but are still ghosts. You and Luke grow closer and closer starting to go from friends to more than that and everyone starts to notice, it just takes a little longer for you two to figure it out.

Word Count: 2,352

First day of school is always hard, especially senior year.... big deal or its supposed to be. You have always had a hard time with school because it was just hard for you to focus, you were always thinking about what you would rather be doing like painting, singing, taking a walk, and most recently learning guitar which Luke had been more than happy to help you with. Luke, Luke Patterson he was a member of your best friend Julies ghost band, Julie and The Phantoms, which included members Luke, Reggie, Alex, and of course Julie. You always knew they existed but it wasn't until recently that you were really able to get to know them your self because until recently only Julie could see them. Ever since they had that curse of a stamp removed from them, they pretty much can choose whenever they want to be seen or touch anything. It has been nice, because now you can really be apart of your best friends new world, you also got to make 3 new really fun and funny friends, they were just as chaotic as you and Julie. You and Luke really clicked from the moment you and him were able to actually see each other, well he has always been able to see you, but this way was much better. Since you and Luke hung out all the time, you found your self spending hours with him a day. In fact thats where you were before school, was with Luke, you guys had this little place by a lake you loved to hang out at, which caused you to be late for your first day.

So deep in your thoughts you didn't even realize you made it to your locker until you heard the all so familiar tone of your best friend calling out your name as she approached your locker "y/n!!! I didn't even see you pull in" Julie said as she now rested against the lockers next to you "Hey Jules! sorry I over slept and was late" Julie rolled her eyes "On your first day! man you really setting the bar high this year" she said laughing at you, You laugh too at the obvious sarcastic tone in her voice "alright, alright!! ms setting the bar high, we better get to class" you say punching Julie playfully in the arm before heading down the hallway to class.

As you sat in class, you started to feel really bad about lying to Julie about the real reason you were late to school today, you just didn't know how to explain how much you and Luke have been hanging out with out her asking a million questions, but its not like it was a big deal. Trying to get out of your head you try to focus on Mr. Berty who was describing the different factors of algebra which you never understood anyway, so you just write notes in hopes that when you study it later you'll understand it.... which never happens either. As you're writing notes you notice something in the window, in the corner of your eye, not really thinking anything of it until you notice that the thing is jumping up and down and no one else is noticing which could only mean one thing. You look to the side and you see Luke in his orange beanie and Rush tank top jumping up and down waving his arms in order to get your attention with the biggest smile on his face, you laugh to your self, and then realizing he must want something, looking at the clock you realized you still had 40 mins left in this class *Oh my gosh! for real its only been 20 minutes!* you thought to yourself; quickly looking from the clock to the window where Luke was still jumping, you raise your hand "Yes ms. Y/L/N" you bring your hand down faster than you want to, slightly hurting it on the desk "May I use the restroom please?" you ask hesitantly, eager to know what Luke wants, Mr. Berty sighed with annoyance "If you really need to, I suppose, but make it fast ms. Y/L/N" you stand up a little to excited "Thank you mr. Berty" you said as you scurried out the door.

When you made it outside Luke stopped jumping, but his smile remained. You loved his smile, it was contagious, you noticed you were smiling too "Luke! what are you doing here" you said punching his arm playfully, he laughed and grabbed his arm pretending that the punch hurt him "Wow the abuse Y/N" with a smirk he continued "Someone help!!! im being abused someone help!!!" you roll your eyes and smack your hand over his mouth "Not that anyone can hear you, but shut up! that did not hurt" you say with a small laugh, as he is laughing underneath your hand "What are you doing here Luke?" you say with your hand still on his mouth, you feel his smile grow bigger underneath your hand "Well, Y/N, Im here because I got something for you!! but you have to come with me to get it" he said with pure excitement, still with your hand on his mouth, then he licked your hand to get it off, you pull away in knee jerk reaction, he smiled "Sorry! as much as I love your hand on my mouth we need to go!" he said eagerly, you laughed and rolled your eyes "Luke, you do realize im at school right?" he grabbed your hand pulling you across the school field "Yeah! but if you really cared about that, you wouldn't have come outside would you" he said, still with the biggest smile on his face, you rolled your eyes even more and gave in knowing he was right "Alright! but where are you taking me" you exclaimed, speeding up to be side by side with him instead of him dragging you, he looked at you, and bit his lip still excited "aha! you'll just have to wait and see" he said and you both smiled. As you kept walking you realized never Luke never let go of your hand from when he was dragging you..... not that it meant anything, it felt nice though.

It took about 15 mins to walk to you and Lukes usual spot by the lake, still holding hands you approached the tree you guys likes to sit by, or sit in depending on if you wanted to climb, which about 90% of the time Luke did.. also doesn't help he can just teleport up there if he wants to, where as you had to do it the hard way while he just laugh at you trying to climb up. This time Luke wasn't going up the tree, he let go of your hand, which kind of made you sad, but then you saw the look on Lukes face, which was pure excitement "Stay right here Y/N!" he said firmly grasping your shoulders to make sure you stayed in place, as he hopped over to the tree "CLOSE YOUR EYES!" he yelled from behind the tree grabbing something, but you obeyed closing your eyes and before you knew it he was in front of you, you could feel it "Alright, you can open" he said softly, you opened your eyes, and there Luke was with the same smile, holding an acoustic guitar, you could tell it was a nice one, just from the shine on it and how pretty the strings looked, you didn't even realize your mouth was wide open until Luke laughed "Ya like it?" he exclaimed, and you just looked at it "Is that for me?" you asked shocked and excited, Luke laughed "Is that for me?" Luke mocked you "Yeah its for you! ya dork" he continued as he hopped over around you, to get behind you so he could place the guitar in front of you for you to hold, you could feel his arms brush against you... which you like as much as the hand holding but, a little more ... again it didn't mean anything, he was just a friend... and Julies band mate. Luke continued talking taking you out of your trance "Ya never answered me though, do you like it" He said still behind you, but now you were holding the guitar, you just looked at it in awe "Where did you get this Luke? How did you get this?" you asked still in shock, Luke just laughed "Don't worry about that!" he said with a mischievous tone, and then you got worried "Luke you didn't ?!... you didn't steal this right!" you asked with actual concern, you wouldn't put it past him, he just laughed and in a teasing tone said "Ouch! you think I would do that Y/N.... Im not that bad!" and then he continued but more serious this time "No! I didn't steal it, Since I have this new found power of choosing when to be seen and stuff, I picked up a small job at the music store downtown, thought why not earn some money.... and then when you asked me to teach you how to play guitar, I wanted to get you your own.... sooooo I have been saving up ever since" he said in a soft tone and then you felt him come closer to you from behind, but now he was putting his hands on the guitar softly playing a melody, while pretty much holding you, as he played the melody you could feel his breath on your neck.... you guys have never been this physically close before, right before you got to lost into your thought Luke continued talking "You! still haven't answered the question though!!! do you like it??" he exclaimed with a teasing tone once again, which caused you to laugh, and you turned around in his arms making the current position pretty much a hug but Lukes holding a guitar "Of course I like it you dork!!" you said excited and continued "This is the nicest thing anyone has done for me...." you looked into his eyes and with a soft tone said "Thank you" he smiled, a soft smile, and his whole face became soft as he relaxed the guitar down by both your sides and looked deeper into your eyes "Of course...." he said softly, both of you just looking deeper into each others eyes, you felt some kind of connection, and you felt like you both were getting closer and closer to each other and then a voice came from behind both of you, causing both of you to shake out of the trance you both shared "Hey! Y/N! Luke! what are you guys doing out here?

You and Luke both jump, moving away from each other as you see Reggie come out of the trees eating a meatball sub. You and Luke look at each other confused as crap as to why Reggie was there and how he knew about it "Hey Reg!" Luke said a little nervous putting his hand behind his head messing with this beanie, you looked flustered flashing your eyes from Luke to Reggie and back to Luke who continued talking "the real question is what are you doing out here buddy?" and Reggie just chuckled a little, while taking another bite off his sandwich "Well, I went to the school to see Kayla like I always do, we like to eat lunch together, then I saw you two run off and thought I would follow" Reggie said with a full mouth, you and Luke shared a look "So you have been here the whole time?" you asked, wondering how you guys didn't notice Reggie was behind you guys the whole time, Reggie smiled a meatball smile since his mouth was still full and he answered "Yeah!! but I wanted to eat my sandwich so I decided to sit down in those trees and eat it" Luke looked at Reggie with a confused look "But Reg, isn't that your sandwich?" Luke asked still confused, and Reggie looked at him, again with a meatball smile "No! this was supposed to be Kaylas sandwich but since I didn't see her, because I followed you guys... I decided to eat it!" You and Luke laughed and Luke stepped forward patting Reggie on the shoulder "Kayla is one lucky girl Reg!" Luke said teasing Reggie, you laughed in response, and then Reggie went back to his initial question "So what are you guys doing out here?" he asked taking yet another bite of the sandwich, in which Luke got nervous again and answered Reggie with a slightly nervous tone "Hey! shouldn't you be getting back to the school, Kayla is gonna be wondering where your at bud" Reggie stopped chewing and his eyes grew big and he looked at Luke "Youre right! awww man, im gonna have to go get another sandwich" Reggie answered in a high pitched nervous tone "Ill see ya guys later!" Reggie said while running away nearly tripping over his own feet. You and Luke sighed and looked at each other, Luke smiled "Well should we get you back to school as well?" Luke asked you with a soft tone added with a light chuckle at the end, you nodded "Yeah, Lunch is gonna be starting soon and Julie is gonna be wondering where I went" you responded, and then looked at your guitar and looked back at Luke "I love my guitar Luke, I really love it!" you said as you wrapped your arms around his neck and gave him a tight hug, he responded by wrapping his arms around your wait pulling you in tighter, when you guys released from the hug you shared another look, quickly shaking it off with Luke responding "I cant wait to teach you some more chords on it!" he said back to his excited state from when you first got there, skipping forward grabbing your hand again as you guys walked back to school together.

[shhhhyoursister]

enemies to lovers/band!au

okay yeah heres the final one, the big boy, the one im probably proudest of, i really really hope you guys like it!!

Matteo was lucky that the conductor liked him, because showing up 10 minutes late to the first rehearsal of the year was bad, even for him. Matteo wasn’t known to be the most responsible member of the band, and usually the only thing he could be counted on to do right every rehearsal was show up, and show up on time. He adjusted his grip on his baritone case as he sped down the hall of the music department, cursing as he checked the time on his phone again, and when he got to the door of the theater they rehearsed in, he cracked it open as quietly as he could.

“Ah, Matteo!” the conductor yelled from the stage, and Matteo flinched before stepping fully into the room, “You decided to show up! I was worried you quit after playing that really loud wrong note at the concert last semester.”

“Which one?” Matteo joked back, knowing that if it was any other professor he would have just apologized and rushed to put his instrument together. He was on a first name basis with Rick, who was probably the most laid back member of the music faculty. Some of the players on stage laughed at the exchange, and Matteo smiled as he popped his case open.

“Just hurry up, we do actually need a full band to rehearse,” Rick said, turning back to his stand with a chuckle, “and poor David looks like he’s going to explode if we don’t start soon.”

Matteo rolled his eyes. As if that would make him set his baritone up faster. He ignored the second wave of laughter that followed the conductor’s comment and grabbed the folder with his music, and made his way onto the stage. He took his seat next to the other baritones, in the third chair, and tried to ignore the glare he could feel coming from the clarinet section.

Matteo was a little upset that he had missed his favorite part of each rehearsal; before Rick got there, when people were still whispering to their stand partners, some quietly tuning their instruments or practicing difficult measures, some tapping their feet and counting out the beats. It felt more alive than when everyone was coming together to play one piece, and while Matteo loved the sound of a full band playing beautiful music, he really needed that calm before the storm. It reminded him that the music that he listened to came from people like him, who had to practice and tune and count and focus to produce the notes and phrases that seemed to flow so naturally.

He risked a glance over at David when Rick asked him to play a note so he could tune the band to it, and, like always, felt a little bit of a shiver run through him when he watched David take a deep breath before playing out a long, perfectly in-tune note. He knew it wasn’t only because of the sound of the clarinet, which Matteo secretly thought was the nicest sounding of all the wind instruments. Although David couldn’t stand him, and Matteo didn’t have too many kind feelings towards him either, it was hard to deny that first of all, David was an amazing musician, and second of all, much less importantly, he was really hot.

Matteo didn’t feel bad for thinking it. Every person in the band who was into men was into David. Matteo would hear girls whispering about him while they were setting up their flutes and oboes, and there was the one guy in the saxophone section who had been trying to get his number for a year. It was old news, but Matteo couldn’t help himself from staring at David when he had long measures of rests, and had to admit that David was the cause of his distraction during some rehearsals.

Rick finished tuning the band, and had them flip to the piece that Matteo was the least confident in. He looked up and took a breath with the whole band when the conductor brought his arms up, and dropped his eyes back to the notes a split second before the downbeat.

Inevitably, Matteo got to a part in the song where he had four measures of rest, and he leaned back in his chair a bit and stretched his neck out. He was counting on his fingers and tapping his foot to the tempo and managed to come back in at the right time, only for Rick to cut them off as he flipped aggressively through the papers on his stand.

“Where is the second page? Why do I only have half of the score here?” He asked angrily, and then huffed and said, “Okay, everyone take out the next piece. David, take over for me.”

Matteo rolled his eyes as Rick walked off the stage, and David took his place in front of the band. David always got the most cocky, smug look whenever he was asked to conduct, and some people rolled their eyes because they knew David was harsher, faster, and much less forgiving than Rick was.

“Okay guys, remember we tried to play this last semester, but some people couldn’t keep up,” his eyes flicked to Matteo, who just shrugged, and then smiled as the frown on David’s face deepened and he continued, “as long as everyone watches me, we’ll be able to get through it. Let’s start at the beginning.”

That won’t be too hard, Matteo thought to himself, and smiled before bringing his lips to the mouthpiece.

They got through the first half of the song with no issues, David going slower than usual to let people warm up to playing it again. Matteo knew that the only reason he hadn’t messed up yet was because his eyes were glued to his sheet music, but he saw that the tempo was changing in a few measures so he would have to look up. Once he did, he caught sight of the serious expression on David’s face, his eyes scanning over the band and darting down to the score in front of him, his arms waving and emphasizing different beats in a fluid and practiced way, keeping the tempo while cuing the other instruments to come in.

“Stop, stop! You were supposed to come in there, baritones, what happened? Are we playing too slow for you?”

Matteo (and everyone else) knew that when David was yelling at the baritones, he was really yelling at Matteo. His animosity was known amongst the other students in the band, so they weren’t surprised to hear a critique aimed at that section of the low brass. That was confirmed when Matteo looked up to see David glaring directly at him, his hand that wasn’t holding the baton clenched tightly around the stand.

They got through the rest of the song with no incidents, Matteo purposefully playing quieter to avoid making any loud mistakes. Rick came back just as David was berating them for speeding up at the end, and he clapped him on the shoulder before waving the missing pages of his score in the air.

“Thank you, David, for re-traumatizing your bandmates. Let’s go back to the first piece, and I promise I won’t yell as much as he did.”

The band laughed and David chuckled (at least he’s self aware, Matteo thought to himself) as he took his seat, with one final glance in Matteo’s direction. They could both see each other from where they were sitting, David being at the end of the second row and Matteo diagonal across from him in the back. He watched as David settled back into his seat and picked his clarinet up, his tongue flicking out to wet the reed, and when David’s eyes shifted back over to him he blushed and looked down at the floor. He scowled, angry that he got caught staring.

***

He struggled through the first week, playing confidently when he could and quieting down whenever he got lost until he could figure out where they were again. Sometimes he found himself so confused he would whisper out of the corner of his mouth, “Where are we?” to his stand partner, and she would roll her eyes before pointing out the correct measure.

The next week of rehearsals, Matteo started out on a much better foot. He was running early as opposed to late, and he hummed to himself as he strolled calmly down the hall leading to the theater. There was one measure of their newest song that he just couldn’t get right, and he flipped open his folder as he walked, knowing that the page with that measure would be at the front. He stopped paying attention to where he was walking, tapping out the beat of the notes on his hip, and just as he turned the corner into the room he crashed into someone leaving, and heard an annoyed, “Are you serious?”

He tensed when he recognized David’s voice, and looked up to see the exact glare he was expecting aimed directly at him. He almost missed the stack of papers that David had dropped, and only noticed when one sheet landed perfectly on top of his open folder.

“Sorry,” Matteo muttered, not knowing what else to say, “let me help.”

“No, I’ll do it,” David snapped back, the glare on his face darkening a little as he snatched the paper on top of Matteo’s folder and said, “I had them organized by section, and by part. You’d just fuck it up. Go set up.”

Matteo took a deep breath through his nose, tired of being torn down every single time David spoke to him, and he took another breath before glaring back and saying, “I wouldn’t fuck it up. I know how sheet music works.”

“Yeah, but if Rick wanted you doing any of this I’m sure he would have asked,” David scoffed, kneeling down so he could gather the papers together, “but he didn’t.”

Matteo bit his lip as felt something angry building in his stomach, and he knew it wasn’t professional or smart of him to do but he couldn’t help but bite back, “Look, we all know that you’re just using us to set yourself up for the future, and that’s fine, but it doesn’t give you the excuse to be a fucking asshole all the time.”

He stormed off before he could see David’s reaction, and set his baritone up with trembling fingers. He was already in his seat and tuned up by the time David stalked into the theater with all of the papers, and Matteo watched with a smug grin as David quietly apologized to Rick for being late before handing off the sheet music and taking his seat. He grabbed his clarinet, his fingers pressing down on the keys harder than was probably good for them, and shot Matteo one final, piercing glare before turning to his music. Matteo smiled to himself as the conductor got everyone’s attention.

***

Things got a little more tense after that.

Getting even more on the bad side of the most talented, and most respected (and most feared) musician in the band was not Matteo’s best idea, but he had no idea how to fix it, and didn’t even know if he cared enough to.

Matteo didn’t know exactly what he was going to do once he graduated, but assumed that he’d figure something out. Pit bands were always looking for fresh talent, so he assumed that he would join one of those and get some menial job on the side while he waited to see where his life would lead. He knew that David, on the other hand, had a plan, and it seemed like their interaction in the hallway led David to believe that Matteo was the one thing standing in his way.

Another week of rehearsals went by, Matteo trying his best not to mess up, and failing almost every session. He knew that his conductor was starting to get a little frustrated, and he didn’t know how to explain that his new bout of issues weren’t coming from a lack of understanding the music; it was just difficult to play when you could feel someone openly glaring at you anytime the first clarinets had rests in the music. He and David hadn’t spoken or interacted at all since the incident in the hallway. They had never really spoken before that, so it wasn’t too unusual, but that amount of glaring was new.

And after a day or two, Matteo started glaring back. He would only do it when David wasn’t looking at him, either focused on the music or counting or watching the conductor, and it felt like the smallest form of retaliation that Matteo was willing to participate in. He knew that he couldn’t talk back to Rick, and he was doing all he could to avoid having to actually speak with David, so the glaring was a good alternative.

It was also a bit of a problem, the glaring. Sometimes Matteo would get lost in his own anger, resulting in him getting lost in the music, and Rick would stop the band and tell the baritones to pay attention to the music, not their bandmates, and Matteo would whip his head back to his music, his cheeks red at being caught.

It came to a head during one rehearsal, the first rehearsal since the glaring had started where Rick had to step out of the room. He handed David his baton and walked off with a wave of his hand, and Matteo noticed David smirking in his direction as he took up the position in front of the band.

“Okay, we’re going to start at measure 46,” David said, his eyes yet again scanning over every member of the band, squinting a little as they passed over Matteo, “the low brass has really been struggling with this section, and I’m going to take it faster so we can see exactly who is having trouble.”

Matteo’s eyes widened as he looked over the part David was referencing, realizing quickly that it was the hardest set of measures for the baritone section out of all of their pieces. He looked up again, trying to look determined despite the nerves starting to make his fingers twitch on the valves of his baritone, and caught David smirking at him again. David raised the baton, and Matteo lifted his baritone to his mouth and tried to focus his eyes on the music.

He managed to play through the first few measures correctly, but his nerves got the best of him and he messed up in one of the worst ways you can mess up as a musician; playing during a full-band rest. He felt his entire body tense up as half the band turned to stare at him, and he knew that it was the perfect excuse for David to go off on him.

“I heard that in the baritones, don’t let me hear it again.” David said sternly, the tip of the baton pointing right at Matteo. He looked mad, but there was something slightly encouraging there too, like he was trying to give Matteo another chance.

Matteo was surprised but grateful that his mistake didn’t send David into a fit and really tried to take that second chance and run with it. They started playing again, and Matteo made it through that measure, and then managed to mess up on the next one. He held one note too long and then played a sharp instead of a flat, and David didn’t stop the band but his head flicked to Matteo and he gave him a look that made his fingers freeze, and it took him a measure to come back in because for some reason that look scared him more than the many critiques and looks he had gotten in the past. David looked furious, as if Matteo was messing up intentionally.

They played through the rest of the section, Matteo getting less tense the more measures he played right, and just as they reached the last measure Rick came back into the theater, the door creaking a little behind him, but enough that it distracted Matteo, who not only played the last note wrong, but he felt his face heat up at the monstrous honk that came out the bell of his instrument.

“Matteo!” David snapped, and his other hand grabbed the top half of the baton and quickly bent it, snapping that as well.

Most of the band  gasped, Matteo included. David seemed shocked himself, staring down at the fractured wood in his hands. Rick walked up to him and without saying a word, grabbed the two pieces, and turned to face the band with a stoic expression.

“I think I’ll call it for today, everyone. I’ll see you tomorrow,” he said, before dropping a hand onto David’s shoulder and looking up at Matteo and saying, “You two, in my office.”

Matteo gulped, and tried to ignore the look on David’s face as he got out of his seat and made his way over to his case. He put his baritone away slowly, watching as the rest of the band filtered out through the main doors, some shooting him sympathetic looks as they walked out. He might not have been the best member of the band, but he was nice enough that most people liked him enough, and probably felt bad knowing that he was about to get screamed at. He looked away when he saw David walk into Rick’s office hot on his heels, already saying something that would probably get Matteo in more trouble.

He made his way over to the office once he had all of his stuff together, and took a deep breath before knocking on the door and walking in. He entered and saw Rick sitting at his desk, looking annoyed, and David standing in front of him with his arms crossed over his chest. He looked like he had just finished ranting, his face red and his chest heaving, and he turned to fix Matteo with a glare as he walked into the room.

“I don’t know why two of my best musicians hate each other as much as you guys do,” he started, and Matteo’s eyes widened a bit at the bluntness of his statement along with the compliment, “but you need to work it out before next week.”

“Sir, I don’t know if I’d say he’s one of the best-” David started, his voice hiding the hint of a pretentious laugh, and before thinking about it Matteo cut him off.

“You don’t know shit about how I play.”

David turned to him with tight lips and said, “Well, I’ve conducted you before, so I think I have a pretty good idea.”

“Yeah, how could I forget being verbally abused.”

“It wasn’t abuse, if you aren’t going to play right I’m going to say something and I’m sorry if I don't sugarcoat it. I focus on being right, not on being nice.”

“Yeah, obviously.” Matteo muttered under his breath, and just as David turned to him to snap back at him, Rick clapped his hands together, loudly.

“Okay, I know what we’re going to do to fix this.”

***

That was how Matteo found himself the next day, an hour before band was supposed to start, during his only free period of the day, making his way to the music building so he could get to the practice rooms. He was walking slow, making sure to be on time but exactly on time, because he didn’t want to spend a second longer with David than he had to.

To their chagrin, Rick decided that the best way for the two to get along was for David to help Matteo figure out the parts of the music that he was struggling with. He had set up mandatory twice a week private sessions for both of them. Matteo had a feeling they wouldn’t make it past the first week without screaming at each other.

Matteo got to the door of the room he was meant to meet David in, and he could hear shuffling so he knew David was there already. He rolled his eyes and braced himself before pushing into the room.

“Put your instrument together,” David said, not even looking at Matteo as he set two chairs up in front of a stand, “ and get your music out. Let’s not be here any longer than we have to be.”

David finally turned around when Matteo didn’t move, and raised an eyebrow at him. Matteo had been expecting the hostility, and knew what he wanted to say in response.

“If we’re being forced to do this,” he said calmly, dropping his baritone case on the chair and popping it open, “I’m not going to let you be a dick to me. You need to be here just as much as I do. If you’re mean I’ll walk out, and then we’re both fucked. Don’t test me.”

He turned and started setting his baritone up, not waiting for David to react or respond to what he said. He only looked up at him once he sat in the chair and had his music on the stand, and he was surprised to see David look down at the ground, his face almost completely neutral except for the corners of his lips, which were twitching up a little.

“Fine,” David said, sitting down in the other chair, moving his leg quickly when his knee bumped into Matteo’s, “Play it right and I won’t be a dick.”

Matteo rolled his eyes but figured that was the best he was going to get, so he took a deep breath before bringing his mouthpiece up to his lips.

He played through the first few measures that David pointed at, trying to be as quick as he could while still following the tempo David was tapping out and playing the notes correctly. He knew that he had nowhere to hide if he messed up. Not that he really did during their bigger rehearsals, but he also felt much more confident playing by himself. He knew he wasn’t going to mess up the timing of anything, but he was worried about a set of measures near the end that had a beat that was so complicated he couldn’t figure it out.

He messed up right away when they got to it and he stopped, expecting David to make some harsh comment that would have him snapping back, but was surprised when his only reaction was, “Go back a few measures, try it again.”

He tried again and messed it up the same way, and then tried again, before putting his baritone down with a huff. He was frustrated at himself for messing it up, especially for messing it up in front of David, knowing that there was no way he wouldn’t say something sarcastic or rude after Matteo messed up for the third time.

“Why are you counting it like that?” David asked, his voice surprisingly devoid of any mocking or cruel tone. He sounded genuinely curious, but Matteo was still wary.

“I don’t know, because that’s how it looks?” He answered quickly, rolling his eyes, shifting uncomfortably under his horn.

“If I’m promising not to be a dick, you need to promise to take this seriously,” David said, turning to look directly at Matteo for the first time since the lesson had started, “I know you don’t really care about all this, but I do, so if that means teaching you how to fucking count I’ll do it. Now, play it again, but right.”

“Who says I don’t care?” Matteo asked, keeping his baritone firmly in his lap, “And I know how to count. That measure just makes no fucking sense.”

“Yes it does, you just aren’t counting it right,” David said, his voice tight, and he took a breath before saying more calmly, “here, give me your horn, I’ll show you.”

Matteo hesitated before handing it over, and he sighed a little in relief when David took Matteo’s mouthpiece off and took another one out of his bag.

Matteo was always impressed at the sound that David was able to pull out of any instrument he touched. There were multiple times where their conductor would ask David to grab an extra trumpet or sax or flute or set of mallets for a marimba, and would shove him wherever the band needed extra help. The only reason he never sent him to sit with Matteo’s section was because they didn’t have any extra horns, and Matteo was beyond grateful for that.

David pointed at the measure, and said, “See, you’re playing this,” he played out the beat that Matteo had been playing and then stopped and said, “but that amount of notes doesn’t fit in the measure, you’re adding an extra one in the middle. It’s supposed to sound like this,” he raised the baritone to his lips again and played out the measure, tapping his foot loudly as he continued playing so Matteo could hear how that measure fit into the rest of the phrase.

He gave Matteo the horn back after switching the mouthpieces again, and Matteo hesitated before starting to play again, and when he got to the measure and played it the way David showed him, it flowed perfectly into the next one and he even saw David smile a little.

“Yeah, you got it that time,” David said, and Matteo smiled back at him before turning back to his music as David said, “now let’s fix this other part.”

***

After a couple of weeks of the private sessions, Matteo was starting to sense a pattern. They would be completely civil during their one-on-one sessions, David only critiquing when necessary and only with comments that were actually helpful, and then they would get to band and it would start all over again. Matteo would get lost, Rick would snap at his section, he would look over and see David glaring at him or shaking his head in disappointment.

He didn’t know why it was getting to him in a way that it hadn’t before. He always knew that David was a little tougher on him than others, but he had really been hoping that the private sessions would stop the glares and the looks and the scoffs whenever he messed up. If anything, the private sessions only made the actual rehearsals worse.

The second boiling point was reached their third week of the private sessions. Matteo had sat through his perfectly cordial hour with David before band, and was even looking forward to playing that day. He felt like he had finally nailed the set of measures that he and David had been working on so he was excited for Rick to hear him play it right. He was so giddy about it that he even smiled when he caught David looking at him from across the band. David had raised a confused eyebrow at him before shifting his gaze back to the front of the band, and Matteo blushed and looked down at the ground, feeling a little silly.

Again, after a little while the conductor had to step away, and again David took his place at the stand, and picked up the baton. He looked right at Matteo as he told the band that they were going to start a few measures before the one Matteo had been messing up, and he sat up a little straighter and returned the look, nodding when David finished speaking. David nodded the slightest bit back at him before raising his arms, and Matteo breathed with the rest of the band before bringing his mouthpiece up to his lips.

And it was like nothing had changed. Matteo found himself getting lost watching David’s waving his arms in all directions, wild but completely in control of himself and the band. He missed one note and David’s eyes flicked to him, and held there as Matteo panicked and stumbled his way through the measure that he had spent two weeks of private lessons fixing.

He saw David’s jaw clench and he cut the band off with a sharp wave of his hand, before turning his full body in Matteo’s direction to say, “So the last few weeks have been a total waste of my time?”

Matteo didn’t think before standing up and walking off the stage, and out of the theater. He ignored the whispers and looks that followed him out, didn’t think about when he was going to be able to go back and get his case and bag and music, and he walked to the hallway of practice rooms and entered one, slamming the door behind him.

***

He emailed Rick and got permission to skip rehearsal the next day, the conductor ending the email with We really need to figure this out before your issues with David end up hurting the rest of the band. Matteo had read the response and collapsed back into bed, glaring over at his baritone (in the case, his roommate and friends brought his stuff out for him after he left).

It was also the first night of the first concert in the music department. Matteo wasn’t performing but he was required to go, and as he got himself ready in his appropriate concert attire, he worried over the fact that David was going to be there, to perform and to watch. Matteo couldn’t think of something he’d like to do less than watch the dude who embarrassed him in front of their entire band perform and get endless praise for it.

Matteo sat quietly next to his friends throughout the concert, and when David walked onto the stage, he felt himself tense up. His best friend Jonas, a trumpet player who was more than aware of the situation in and out of rehearsal, put a hand on his leg and squeezed, trying to offer a bit of comfort. Matteo smiled tightly at him as David lifted his clarinet to his lips and took a deep breath.

No matter how much Matteo hated him, he couldn’t ignore the fact that David was the best clarinet player he had ever heard. It was like his body and his clarinet were formed together, the way he breathed sound through it and moved around it, how quickly he could run his fingers over the keys and play the most complicated string of notes without a single flaw. Matteo found himself entranced by the song David played, and he opened his eyes when the last note faded out into the otherwise silent theater, and he watched as David kept his clarinet up for a beat after the song finished before his eyes opened, and they looked directly into Matteo’s as the audience clapped around him.

He looked away as quickly as he could, ignoring the face Jonas made at his sudden movement, and tried to focus his attention completely on the girl who stepped up next with her violin. He only let his eyes flick to David once more before the concert was over, and while his view was obscured because David was sitting a few rows ahead of him, Matteo could see his fingers twitching in his lap, probably resisting the urge to make the player follow his lead. The concert was over after that last girl, and Matteo turned to his friends quickly to stop himself from staring in David’s direction again.

Coincidentally, (or not at all) the night of the first concert in the music department was also the night of the first party being held by some people in the percussion section, a couple of guys who had a big house that was perfect for hosting a bunch of drunk but mild-mannered music majors.

Matteo had barely even wanted to go, knowing that his reputation amongst the rest of the band was not a great one. He wasn’t hated, but most only knew of him because of the amount of times per rehearsal the conductor would have to stop and critique the baritones (him) or tell the baritones (him) what measure they were on, and now because of all the new drama with David. He also didn’t want to face his bandmates after walking out during the last rehearsal, but the pushing and prodding of his friends made him reluctantly agree.

“Dude, we’re gonna get you so fucked up you can’t even think about what an asshole Schreibner is,” Carlos said as they made their way to the house.

Matteo snorted as they turned onto the correct block, and they quickly spotted the house that was holding the party. There were lights and music loud enough that they could hear it down the street, and Carlos and Abdi started whooping before running over to it.

“You don’t have to go in if you don’t want to,” Jonas said when Matteo hesitated near the front door.

Matteo waited another second before shoving into the house, and throwing back over his shoulder, “Who cares about that asshole, I want to drink!”

And drink he did. Matteo was on his third beer after only twenty minutes, and he was considering it a win that he hadn’t seen David yet. He could feel himself getting more drunk, and didn’t know what he would even say to David if he saw him. He was glad that the little corner of the room he and his friends had grabbed seemed to be pretty hidden away.

Matteo was handed a joint after a little while and he grabbed it quickly, sticking the end in his mouth and taking a deep hit. He closed his eyes as he blew the smoke out his nose, and took another hit as he opened his eyes slowly, and saw David walk into the room. He didn’t seem to notice Matteo though, seemingly focused on getting to someone that was standing in the opposite corner.

“I didn’t know that David and Leonie are friends,” Carlos said quietly, staring over at the two, “she’s in the orchestra with Kiki. I heard she’s just like David but worse.”

“Matteo would love her, then,” Jonas said, ruffling his hair, and he flipped him off before taking another hit and passing the joint along.

“Why are talented and attractive people such assholes,” Matteo said, and when the three other boys turned to him, their eyes wide, he asked, “what?”

“Did you just say something nice about David?” Abdi asked with a grin, and Matteo rolled his eyes as the boys all oooohed.

“Me saying he’s attractive and talented isn’t nice, especially when that was the lead up to me calling him an asshole,” Matteo said, grabbing the joint when it was handed back to him, “I don’t have a single nice thing to say about David. He can play good, but he’s a piece of shit and nobody is going to hire someone with his kind of attitude. He thinks just ‘cause he can play and wave his arms around in the air that he’s going to become a famous musician and conductor, but he needs to work on being a decent fucking person first.”

His rant wasn’t the most coherent, but it felt good to get off his chest, and he leaned back against the wall and took a hit to emphasize his point. The boys were quiet, and when Matteo raised an eyebrow at Jonas, he tilted his head to the front of the group where David was standing, scowling at him.

“We need to fucking talk.” David growled out through his teeth, his hands clenched into tight fists at his sides, looking like he was going to vibrate out of his skin with the amount of tension in his body.

Matteo said nothing but handed the joint off, and followed after David when he turned and walked out of the room. He was done. At that point he didn’t give a fuck if he got kicked from the program, or if he was fucking kicked out of the school, because he and David needed to settle whatever their issue was then and there.

David led him down the hall and he knocked loudly on a door before shoving it open, and grabbed Matteo’s wrist to pull him inside. Matteo noticed it was a bathroom, and quickly glanced around to see if anybody was watching them. He wondered what they thought was happening. Someone in the band would probably recognize the stiff way David was holding his body, and see Matteo trailing almost lazily behind him, and know that something was about to go down. But someone else might just see two boys going into a bathroom together at a party, and come to a completely different conclusion. Matteo almost laughed at the thought. Yeah, he was gay, but he didn’t know if David was. He didn’t know if David even had the time or patience to date or hook up with anyone.

He could tell that his apparent apathy towards the situation was just pissing David off further, so he closed the door slowly, not even locking it before leaning back against it with a bored sigh. He definitely wasn’t actually as calm as he looked; he crossed his arms across his chest so the shaking in his hands would be less obvious, and it was taking a lot of effort to keep his face neutral when he saw how angry David was. He didn’t think David was going to hurt him or anything, but he was terrified about what the fight could lead to when it came to his position in the band.

“I don’t know what your fucking problem is, Matteo, but I don’t have any kind of attitude. I care about what I do and I want it to be done right. It’s not my fault that you don’t care enough to actually try, but it is really fucking with my experience here,” David said quietly, his voice a little too calm for his red face and clenched fists, “I can’t conduct a band when I need to stop every five seconds because you lose your place.”

Matteo snorted, and leaned his head back against the door. It was taking him a minute to figure out what he wanted to say and he was surprised that David was quiet, like he was giving Matteo the time to think.

“David,” Matteo said, after figuring out what was probably the dumbest part of the whole issue, “you’re good enough to be hired anywhere. Me being a shitty band member won’t stop you,” he paused for a moment, and then picked his head up and said, “And I do try. I’m good. The only reason I’m still here is because they know I’m good. I just don’t need to prove it like you do.”

He was glad that his mind was clear enough to get his exact point across, and he watched David as his words sunk in, realizing that David had probably drank too, considering the way he was leaning back on the counter, his legs a little unsteady. David stared at Matteo for a minute before standing up straighter.

“I don’t need to prove anything,” he said, “I know I’m good.”

“Then why are you such a dick?” Matteo asked, “Like, specifically to me? Yeah, you yell at everyone but you’re just mean to me. Are you homophobic or something?”

Matteo couldn’t stop the thought from drifting through his mind and out his drunk mouth. Maybe David was, and there was going to be no way to solve the issue. What the fuck would he tell Rick?

“What? No, I’m not homophobic,” David said, looking like he wanted to laugh at the idea but was too confused to, “I’m trans.”

“Trans people can be homophobic.” Matteo said, shrugging, knowing that it was a stupid point to make. He was honestly just happy for a break in the tension.

David actually laughed, before tilting his head and smirking at Matteo and saying, “Trust me, I’m not. That would be kinda weird considering I’m also not straight.”

The way he said it made something hot bloom in Matteo’s stomach, and he hated his stupid, gay brain for reacting. That statement combined with the look on David’s face, and the fact that despite their stupid rivalry David was still really fucking hot, was making Matteo lose sight of the original conversation a little.

“You’re hot.” He said, verbalizing his thoughts before he could stop himself, and then he clamped his mouth shut and bit his lip, half terrified that David was going to get angrier, and half glad that he was just getting everything off his chest thanks to the alcohol in his system.

David fell back against the counter, the smirk dropping from his face, and he blinked before stammering out, “Uh. What?”

“I think you heard me,” Matteo said, shrugging, and then he looked off to the side before looking back at David’s confused face and saying again, “you’re hot.”

“Why- what does that have to do with any of this?” David asked, and Matteo couldn’t tell if he was angrier but he sounded different, in a way that made him stand up against the door a little.

He just shrugged again, and then stared at David as he tried to work through whatever was going on in his head. Matteo watched as he stood still for a minute, his fists loosening and tightening at his sides, and he watched as David’s eyes scanned up and down his body with the same focus they would scan the band with, and he watched as David pushed himself off the sink, took a few confident steps forward, and shoved Matteo against the door and pressed their lips together.

Matteo’s eyes widened and then slid closed as he felt David’s hands clutching tight onto his hips, and he grabbed at David’s arms and just as he started moving his lips David pulled away roughly, and was back against the sink in a second.

“That was a bad idea,” David said, holding onto the edge of the sink, avoiding Matteo’s eyes by looking off to the side, “we’re both drunk, we’re fighting, we can’t do that.”

“We don’t have to fight,” Matteo said, knowing that it probably was a bad idea but stepping forward anyway, until he was close enough to see just how tight David was anchoring himself to the sink, “you can tell me to fuck off and I will. Or,” he said, taking another step closer until his foot was kicking against David’s and he could reach out and grab his wrist, “I can stay.”

David only looked back at him when he felt the tug on his arm, and he looked down at Matteo’s hand before looking him in the eyes. Matteo took a risk and slid his hand down, grabbing David’s, and was shocked when David used that grip to pull him in for another kiss, backing him up until his back was smacking into the door again. He got an arm around David’s neck before he was pulling away,  again, and Matteo sighed as David rubbed a hand over his face and said, “Fuck, no, this is such a bad idea.”

“Maybe,” Matteo said, rolling his shoulders as he asked, “can you just make up your mind? This is hurting my back.”

David looked at Matteo again, looked him up and down the same way that he had earlier that night, and something seemed to click. He tilted his head again, his eyes filled with a sudden new brightness as he stepped forward, placing his hands on the door on either side of Matteo’s hips, boxing him in.

“Okay, here’s the plan,” he said, and Matteo raised an eyebrow, amused, before he continued, “whatever happens tonight happens, and then we don’t talk about it, and it never happens again. Deal?”

Matteo thought it over for a minute, more trying to get one last little jab at David by making him wait for an answer, and once he saw David’s face go from confident to bordering on annoyed, he grinned and stuck out his hand, and said, “Deal.”

David ignored his hand but grabbed his ass and pulled him in close, his hands dragging up to Matteo’s waist as their mouths met again, and Matteo slid a hand into David’s hair and let himself melt against the door.

***

Matteo woke up the next morning with a dry mouth and a bad headache, both of which he attributed to the hangover he almost definitely had. He couldn’t even remember drinking that much, but the pain behind his eyes was more than just him being tired like usual. He got himself out of bed, just wanting to drink some water and get into a hot shower to wash away the sweat and alcohol from the party.

He got into the bathroom and turned the shower on, tugging his shirt over his head as he yawned and rubbed at his eyes. He blinked at himself in the mirror, taking in the pale face, the fucked up hair, the red eyes, the bruise on his neck, the-

Matteo jolted forward and slapped his hand over the mark on his neck, before moving it so he could gawk at the dark purple and red. Seeing it brought back a rush of memories from the night before, memories that Matteo couldn’t believe he had forgotten, and he stared at himself with wide eyes and let out a quiet, “Fuck.”

***

Matteo debated whether or not he should skip the next band rehearsal. He knew that realisitcally he couldn’t, and that skipping because of a hickey was so dumb that he shouldn’t have even been considering it. He just didn’t want to face his friends and have them ask questions, and even more than that he didn’t want to see David.

He figured that David wasn’t planning on showing up for their usual private session, so he got to band with just enough time to still be considered early, and he found a quiet corner of the theater to set his baritone up in, a row of seats off to the side. He smiled when he saw Jonas come in, but it fell quickly when he saw Jonas notice the hickey on his neck, and the pure joy and confusion that came over his face.

“Dude!” Jonas exclaimed, staring obviously at the mark, “Who gave you that?”

“Someone from the orchestra, I barely remember his name.” Matteo said as casually as he could, having thought of the lie on his way to band. Jonas nodded with a grin and held out his fist, and Matteo rolled his eyes and bumped his against it, grateful that the idea of him and David hooking up was so unbelievable that it wouldn’t even enter Jonas’ mind.

“And what happened with Schreibner?” Jonas was bouncing on his toes, excited for the news and probably expecting a story.

Matteo snorted and rolled his eyes again, before turning back to his half-assembled baritone, and shrugged and said, “We worked it out.”

Fucked it out is more like it, Matteo thought to himself, and he shook his head to rid it of that kind of thinking.

Matteo got settled in his seat, listening to the cacophony around him, and then finally let himself glance around the room to see where David was. He was surprised when he didn’t find him, unable to think of any other time where David showed up late (besides that one time with the sheet music), but the doors suddenly burst open and the conductor walked in, David hot on his heels as always, whispering as they finished up what looked to be an intense conversation.

“Sorry we’re late, we got caught up discussing the sequence of songs for the concert, but I’m glad to see you’re all ready to go.” Rick said as he grabbed his baton, and he waited for David to sit in his usual seat in the clarinet section before counting them into their first song.

Matteo spent the entire rehearsal trying his hardest to not stare at David while doing exactly that, but he was lucky that David never returned his gaze. He seemed to be actively avoiding looking in Matteo’s direction, which made sense considering the deal they had made, but he was still a little let down that David didn’t even look at him. He even found himself disappointed when David didn’t end up conducting that day, and got up and went over to his case once they were dismissed.

He was glaring at his bottle of valve oil, realizing that he was low and was going to need to go get more, when a shadow fell over him. He looked up with a smile, assuming it would be Jonas, but it dropped when he saw David standing there. He had his jacket on, his clarinet case clutched tightly in his hand, and his backpack on his back, and he was staring down at Matteo with something between apathy and irritation on his face.

“Where were you earlier?”

Matteo raised an eyebrow. He tossed the valve oil back in his case before snapping it shut, and stood up and gathered all of his things before turning to face David again and shrugging, letting his eyes drift to the side as he said, “I figured I’d give things a day to chill after...you know.”

“After what?” David asked, with a tilt of his head, and more pointed, forced confusion on his face than Matteo had ever seen. Oh, so that was how it was gonna be.

Matteo smiled back tightly. “You know what, never mind. I’ll be there next time.”

There was a moment where David’s eyes darted down to Matteo’s neck and back up just as quick. His cheeks got a little pink. Matteo smirked.

“Good.” David said simply, and then turned and left. Matteo stared after him, and smirked when he saw David turn again to look at him one more time before almost jogging out of the theater.

Matteo heard a snort from behind him, and he whipped his head around to see Jonas standing there.

“Fuckin’ dick,” he said, tilting his head in the direction of the door, “what was he yelling about this time?”

“Nothing important.” Matteo said, shrugging again, readjusting his grip on his baritone case as they started walking towards the door.

“Is it ever with him?” Jonas joked, elbowing Matteo in the arm, and they both laughed as they left the theater, Jonas waving a goodbye to the people who called out to him. Nobody said anything to Matteo, and he sighed as they made their way down the hall.

“Who knows, man,” Jonas started after a second, pausing and then turning to Matteo with a grin, jabbing him again, “maybe Schreibner is just secretly gay and super jealous of whoever gave you that hickey.”

Matteo snorted, before laughing out loud as they got outside. He shook his head and chuckled when Jonas shot him a confused look.

“I don’t think that’s it.”

*****

The next day that Matteo was meant to meet David, he woke up, and the anxious and dark feeling that settled over him immediately made him want to turn over and go back to sleep. It didn’t have anything to do with David, Matteo knew that, had a diagnosis that proved that, but he couldn’t help the dread that filled him at the thought of sitting in a practice room getting scolded over and over again by the same guy who had given him a hickey the week before.

He lit a joint as he left his place. There were tons of off-campus apartments around his school, and he had managed to get a place with Jonas. It was small, but they had all the rooms they needed, and a balcony attached to Matteo’s room for him to smoke on. It was perfect.

Smoking that day was a bad choice, though. He had gone to band high before, and knew that his fingers would be slower and he wouldn’t be able to focus, but it wouldn’t be any different with the fog filling his head. The only difference was that at least he would be out of it enough to not be bothered by the criticizing.

But by the time he got there, he had almost forgotten that before he had band, he had to see David. He knew it would be obvious he was high, and was preparing himself for whatever David would have to say about it. He was also a little late because he needed to take a minute outside of the building to breath and calm himself down. The weed had done the job of dulling everything coming in, but the anxiety twisting up inside of his gut was still pretty active. He took another shaky breath before pushing into the practice room.

“You’re late.” David said sternly, turning in the seat to glare at Matteo as he shuffled in. Matteo barely acknowledged that he had spoken besides a half shrug until he was settled in his chair, with his baritone set up.

“Bad morning,” he said in a quiet voice, before putting his music on the stand and saying, “let’s just start.”

David went easy on him at first, starting off with one of their simpler songs just to make sure Matteo understood one set of measures that the entire band had been messing up. It didn’t require much complex counting or a lot of movement, so Matteo was playing fine. It was a little further into the session when David switched to a different song, one that Matteo could play most days, but not with his fuzzy brain and fingers that started to shake when David pointed at the measure he wanted Matteo to start with,

He barely got through the first measure before David was cutting him off and telling him to start over, and then stopping him again to count out the beats, and then finally stopping him again when Matteo was playing at a tempo so wrong that he didn’t even know what he was doing.

“Okay, stop, stop,” David said, and he flopped back in his chair with a huff, “what the fuck is going on today?”

“Nothing,” Matteo muttered, leaning back in his chair as well, but crossing his arms over his chest, “I told you, bad morning.”

David turned to stare at him, actually looking at him for the first time he had come in, and Matteo saw understanding dawn on his face before a glare took its place.

“Oh, I get it,” David said, shifting back in his chair, “you’re really trying to get kicked out, aren’t you?”

“No, what the fuck?” Matteo said, shaking his head at the idea.

“So you thought coming in stoned was a good way to keep your spot?”

Matteo froze, before asking quietly, “Are you going to narc?”

David rolled his eyes and snorted, and opened his mouth, before closing it again and leaning back more in his chair. He squinted at Matteo for a second, and then asked, “Why did you do it?”

“What?” Matteo asked, running a hand through his hair, his eyes darting to the side because he hadn’t even thought about what could happen if David told anyone that he had showed up high.

“Get high, before coming here? If you aren’t trying to get kicked out? Did you think it was a good idea?” David seemed almost amused by the conversation.

“None of your fucking business.”

“I kind of think it is, though, if you’re going to be showing up here, at a time that I only agreed to meet at because you need help-”

“Shut the fuck up, you have to be here just as much as I do, in case you forgot,” Matteo snapped, feeling himself losing a bit of the control that he was usually very careful to hold onto, “and if you really need to know, my brain is pretty fucked up and coming here and getting yelled at by you doesn’t help. Shockingly, it makes it worse. So if you’re going to run off and tell the department that I’m high, make sure they know it’s because you’re so unbearable to work with that it’s the only way I can get through it.”

David stared at him, and swallowed, his face unreadable. Matteo took a deep breath and looked down at the ground, his pulse pounding in his ears. He pressed his fingers down on the valves of his baritone as he tried to get his breathing back under control after losing his temper, and with the new panic that was filling him. He was done for. There was no way David would let him get away with all of that, and Matteo knew that the department would not be happy to hear that he showed up to a rehearsal high before screaming at everyone’s favorite.

“Okay,” David said quietly, “I’m sorry.”

Matteo’s head whipped to him. “What?”

“Don’t get me wrong, I’m pissed that you’re high right now,” David said, but his voice was still soft, and he was looking at Matteo with the closest thing to sympathy on his face that Matteo had seen from him, “but brains can suck. And I get that I can be...blunt.”

Matteo snorted. “Blunt, sure.”

“So here’s what we’re gonna do,” David said, and he took his phone out of his pocket and started typing, “have you ever listened to the songs that we’re playing?”

“Well, he played new pieces for us in the beginning of the semester. And I hear them when we play.” Matteo said with a shrug. He had never really been the type to listen to band music. He loved it, and loved playing it, but it already took up so much of his time. When he was listening to music on his own he usually chose stuff that he couldn’t tell you the time signature of.

“Yeah, but sitting in a section of a band and listening to the people around you is really different from hearing it like the audience does,” David said, barely looking up, “we still have some time before rehearsal, so let’s just listen to the songs until it’s time to go. I’ll point out some parts that you’re struggling with so you can hear how you fit into everything else.”

“Oh. Okay. That sounds good.” Matteo said, staring at David in shock as he kept tapping on his phone. After a few seconds, Matteo could hear the run that starts the first song in their program. David raised the volume and set his phone on the stand, and then leaned back in his chair, the corners of his lips turning up as the clarinet came in, playing the solo that David played every class.

“That person played it better,” Matteo said under his breath, a little uncomfortable with how suddenly accommodating David was being. He was sure light teasing was still safe. He smirked at the eyebrow David raised.

They listened to the next couple of songs, David pausing every now and then to point things out or tell Matteo to listen to the part coming up next. Matteo could see his hands twitching on his lap, tapping along to the beat, and sometimes, seemingly without even noticing, his hand would come up and with just a finger he would conduct to the room. Matteo watched until it seemed like David wasn’t paying attention to him anymore, and he leaned back in his own chair, and closed his eyes.

He was still listening, and he continued tapping his foot to the beat of every song that played. As the last note of the last piece played out in the room, Matteo let out the breath he had taken in and held during the final crescendo. He didn’t realize until then that he hadn’t even put away his baritone, the horn just resting in his lap, his hands moving across the brass and pressing down on the valves of their own accord.

“We should probably head out,” Matteo heard, and he opened his eyes slowly, not expecting to meet David’s as quickly as he did. David was staring at him with another unreadable expression, biting his lips as his eyes darted around Matteo’s face, down to his lips, before he bit his own and jumped up from his chair with a, “yeah, we need to be there in ten. Let’s pack up.”

*****

[insert blah blah whatever but then the conductor is like haha later this week im gonna be gone and david is gonna conduct all of you the whole time and matteo is like “lol k” but it actually ends up being fine?? And matteo plays better and david doesnt have to say anything to him and near the end he actually SMILES at him and matteo is like okay oaky….this is kinda nice i like not fighting with this dude also hes STILL SO FUCKING CUTE]

[flash forward to a couple weeks later they're still kinda getting along like they are still constantly teasing and bantering and arguing but its like,, nice and funny and ,maybe flirty??????]

“Why can’t we talk about it?” Matteo asked, finally, snapping his case shut and turning to stare at David’s suddenly stiff back. He heard David’s case zip up after a second, before he turned around, a tight smile on his face.

“Talk about what?” he asked, crossing his arms over his chest in a way that made it obvious he wasn’t pleased.

“Stop acting like it’s fucking crazy that two people who don’t like each other got drunk at a party and hooked up,” Matteo said, rolling his eyes at David’s carefully controlled expression, “just because you’re so busy and important doesn’t mean you have to be boring.”

“I’m not boring,” David hissed, but he flopped back down in his seat and rolled his eyes up to the ceiling before saying, “I don’t want other people in the band finding out. I have a reputation with them, and I know that...I know this would make things weird.”

“If anything they’ll be jealous of me,” Matteo said with a laugh, “as if you don’t know how many of them eye fuck you while you’re conducting.”

“I’m not...oblivious,” David huffed, and Matteo smirked when he saw his cheeks get red as he looked down at the ground, “and that’s not it.”

Matteo tilted his head, trying to figure out what David meant as he looked up from the ground but off to the side, chewing on his lip. Somewhere in the back of his head a thought started brewing, and once he thought it it was impossible not to clear his throat, and take a breath before asking, “Is it because you think I’m bad? Like, a bad player? Do you not want them knowing you hooked up with me?”

“What? Matteo, no,” David looked at him sincerely for the first time since Matteo had started the conversation, and he reached a hand out, and Matteo jumped when it wrapped gently around his wrist, “I don’t think you’re a bad player, and that...that isn’t the problem. You aren’t the problem with this.”

“Then what is?” Matteo asked, exasperated even though he was the one to ask.

“It’s them,” David said, gesturing vaguely out but Matteo could guess he meant their bandmates, “I love them, but do you know how hard it would be to lead a group of people, including lots of people who have hit on me, if they knew I hooked up with the one member of the band that I-”

“That you what?” Matteo asked too quick, excited to hear the answer.

“That they have seen me get angry in the past- perhaps angrier than necessary.” David said calculating and slow, like admitting it hurt him somewhere deep. Matteo kind of hoped it did. After smiling to himself at that he refocused on the point of the conversation.

“Do you really think I’m planning on telling any of them?” he asked, shaking his head in disbelief, “The only other people I talk to besides you are Carlos, Abdi, and Jonas, and I’m not telling them about any of it because I don’t want them giving me shit for any of it.”

“Why do you even want to talk about this?” David asked, looking up and fixing Matteo with a hard stare, “It happened a while ago, and it’s not like we had some romantic fucking moment of reconiliation. We got drunk, we argued, we hooked up, and now we can move on.”

“Well,” Matteo said, licking his lips and shrugging before looking up at David again, knowing that he didn’t really have a reason besides, “I had fun.”

David opened his mouth, and then closed it again, and then opened it again and just went, “Okay?”

“Didn’t you?” Matteo asked, trying for confidence, but coming off as a little desperate with the way he twisted in his seat to make sure he would catch David’s answer.

“I mean…” David started, his cheeks getting darker as his eyes darted around the room, then down to Matteo’s lips and up to his eyes again as he said, “yeah. I did.”

“Yeah, so,” Matteo said, shrugging again, “what’s the big deal if we acknowledge it? It happened, and now we-” he cut himself off, before taking a deep breath and continuing, “and now we see what happens next.”

David’s eyes popped open. Matteo shrugged again before standing and picking his case up, and his bag, and taking a couple of steps to the door. He turned when he heard silence behind him, and saw David frozen in his seat, still staring at him. He stared back for a moment before gesturing out the door and asking, “Are you coming?”

David blinked and nodded, before getting up and gathering his things as well, and he followed Matteo out the door, and they made the short trek to rehearsal.

Matteo felt different sitting down next to his bandmates that day. He was still full of adrenaline, but felt ready to play, quietly humming one of their songs to himself as his fingers pressed down on the associated valves. He couldn’t stop his gaze from flicking to David every few minutes, and he caught David looking back just as Rick walked onto the stage. David coughed and looked away, and Matteo smiled to himself before leaning back in his seat.

He could feel David’s eyes on him throughout the rehearsal, and he was surprised, but it encouraged him to keep sneaking peeks as well. His eyes would wander up from the page even when he was playing just to catch a glimpse of David in his seat, sitting up straight, his strong arms and shoulders holding the clarinet up, his lips wrapped around the mouthpiece-

Matteo was glad he had a lot of rests.

“David! You were supposed to come in there!” Rick yelled suddenly, smacking the score in front of him with his baton, “You’ve never missed that cue before, what’s got you so distracted today?”

The band was silent and they watched David blush as he said, “Sorry, Rick, I’ll focus better. Won’t happen again.”

The conductor just shook his head before telling them to start the piece over, which was followed by angry grumbles and the sound of papers flipping. David looked down at the ground, his cheeks an angry red, and Matteo bit back the smile that threatened to grow on his face.

[david cancels their next private lesson and matteo is like what why and then he gets to band that day and david is conducting again and he basically ignore matteo the entire time and matteo is a lil mad and then after matteo goes up to him and is like “hey wtf why did you cancel on me and then not even correct me when i messed up” and david is like “fuck cause youre super fucknig distracting now and i cant spend an hour alone with you and then get up in front of a group of people and conduct like an idiot cause im too busy thinking about YOU” but hes likes embarassed and actually mad about it and matteo is like oh my god are we going back to the anger i thought we were passed that and davids like well i guess not and matteos like lmao do we need to hook up again cause that seemed like it worked pretty well last time and david is like,, so fucking pissed but is more pissed that hes kind of into that idea so he locks the practice room door and basically they hook up in the practice room because wow what a fantasy that is]

[things are like….weird but chill for a while after that. It seemed like being able to hook up with matteo again made david less distracted by him in a destructive way and even put a bit of a pep in his step?? And matteo notices that hes being a bit nicer to everyone, not just him, and hes actually smiling and complimenting matteo during their private sessions, and even though nothing is explicitly referenced they both know something's going on. Neither of them would call the other a friend though]

[this is after they hook up the third time, which is the first time that isnt completely out of anger but they arent really friends They just happened to run into each other after a concert and were both being a bit flirty and matteo was very boldly like “hey uh come back to my place” because he thinks and david actually does]

“Tell me something about you,” Matteo said, turning his head and propping it up on his arms so he could see David. The light was low in the room, and the plant near his lamp was casting strange shadows on the walls, and on David himself, leaned back against the wall like he was.

“Uh,” David started, his eyes dancing around the room as he tried to think of something, “I started playing the clarinet when I was-”

Matteo reached out and pinched his leg. David twitched, and raised an eyebrow at him. Matteo hoped that David was okay with the fact that he just kept touching him. It was hard to keep his hands away, and he didn’t know David’s comfort level with non-sexual physical contact. So far he seemed more amused than anything else.

“Tell me something not related to music.” Matteo said, and David snorted at the request.

“Why?” He asked, reaching down to push Matteo’s hair out of his eyes. He bit his lip, wishing that David kept his hand on him longer.

“I just think, you know,” Matteo said, hoping he wasn’t pushing it by sliding his hand onto David’s thigh, the same one he had pinched, “might not be the time to to get into that topic. Just in case.”

I don’t want to start arguing when we just had really great sex and we’re like five minutes away from cuddling if I play my cards right, is what Matteo was thinking, but he figured he got the point across.

David hummed, and nodded, the amused smile still on his face, and tilted his head against the wall and said, “Okay, let me think.”

Matteo stared at him, from where the blanket was draped over his lap, up his bare chest, up the angle of his neck, and still found himself blown away at how beautiful he was. He sighed, glad that David wasn’t watching him swoon.

“Okay I got something,” David said suddenly, turning to Matteo, his eyes bright, “so, growing up we had a cat. My sister got to name it because she was older, and she named the cat Martha Jones, after a Doctor Who character. That cat fucking hated me.”

Matteo laughed, but David didn’t look like he was done, so he prompted him with, “And?”

“Years later, I moved in with my sister, and she wants us to get another cat. So, we go to a shelter, and there’s a cage in the back with a sign on it that says ‘Martha Jones’. Completely different cat, but of course my sister says we have to see her.”

Matteo nodded, enthralled.

“So she goes to ask a worker, and this dude says that that cat was a biter, would hiss, and scratched anyone that went near her unless they had food. Laura insisted, because she’s stubborn, so they brought us into a room and the dude basically tossed the cat in with us and closed the door.”

“That doesn’t sound safe.” Matteo said, shifting closer until he was able to rest his head in David’s lap. He couldn't hold back the need any longer, and he was pleased when David started playing with his hair.

“It wasn’t, she immediately scratched me so bad I started bleeding,” David said with a chuckle, “but she chilled out after a bit, my sister was very persistent. After like 20 minutes she was purring in my lap.” David finished with a proud smile down at Matteo.

If Matteo hadn’t already been crushing that would’ve sealed the deal. It did make something soft settle in his chest, and made his hands a little tingly, and he didn’t think twice before asking, “Can I see a picture?”

David looked thrilled at the question, and he leaned over to grab his phone. Matteo watched, biting back a grin as David scrolled through his pictures before settling on one and handing his phone over, obviously excited for Matteo to see.

The first thing Matteo could make out was a metal music stand, the same basic kind he had in his room for practicing, but it was tilted so the tray was lying flat. He grinned at the cat bed that was resting on top of it, and actually awwwed out loud at the pretty calico, splayed out on her back in a sunbeam. The stand was in front of a large window, and Matteo could see plants around it, and he wondered if it was David’s room.

“Yeah,” David said, looking at the picture again himself before putting his phone down. Matteo felt a tug on his hair, and he looked up to see David staring down at him, and he said, “now you.”

“Me? I don’t have any cats to show off,” Matteo said, wrapping his arms around David’s legs so he could squeeze himself closer.

“No, now you have to tell me something about yourself,” David said, rolling his eyes, but his face was softer than Matteo had ever seen it.

“Oh, shit,” Matteo said, not thinking that David was going to turn the conversation on him, and he hummed for a second before saying the first thing he could think of, “well, I like to sing. When I was younger I used to have a vocal coach and everything, now I mostly just sing whenever my roommate isn’t home.”

It wasn’t something he brought up, or really thought about too often, because ultimately the decision for him to stop the training was out of his hands, and he regretted not being able to go farther with it the same way he could with the baritone.

“Why’d you stop?” David asked, his voice soft, as if he could sense the sadness underlying the statement.

“Well,” Matteo said, shifting back a little bit so he could roll onto his back and say it up to the ceiling, “my mom was the one who got me the lessons, I had already been taking them for the baritone for a year or so. My dad got pissed, because I was already singing in the church choir at that point, and he didn’t want singing to distract from my other music shit. When I got older, uh,” he paused to take a breath, “there was a while where my mom wasn’t living with us, so all the singing lessons stopped. I stopped singing at church, too, and, well. I was better at the baritone anyway.”

He hadn’t noticed that while he had been talking, David had slid down more on the bed until he was resting on his side, and he was staring with a concerned look when Matteo turned to him again,

“They have vocal coaches through the school,” David said, an arm inching across the mattress towards Matteo, “you can sign up for one, if you want. I can get you the email of the person who sets them up, I-”

Matteo laughed at David’s eagerness to help, cutting him off, and rolled back over onto his side, surprised at how close he found himself to David. He felt a hand gently sliding onto his hip, and he bit his lip, his eyes meeting David’s, and he leaned in to kiss him.

David didn’t seem to have expected it. He made a sound, and Matteo worried for a moment that he was going to pull away but instead he was pulled in closer, David’s hand sliding onto the small of his back. He pulled away, and David rolled onto his back, his cheeks pink.

“Thanks, but I don’t need any of that,” Matteo said, and he hesitantly let his head drop onto David’s shoulder, and then let his arm drape across his stomach when David tangled their legs together, “it’s just something I do for fun now.”

“For fun,” David repeated, and then took a breath and asked, “since the topic of music is back on the table, do you want to hear a secret?”

Matteo looked up, amused, and then propped his chin on David’s chest so he could see him better, and he said, “Yes, please.”

“So, I can play almost every wind instrument, right? And brass too, and I can figure out percussion pretty quickly. I can pretty much play anything you’ll find in the average wind ensemble, and then some.”

Matteo rolled his eyes, “That’s not a secret.”

“Yeah, but,” David took another breath, and it seemed like it actually pained him to say, “I can’t play anything with fucking strings.”

“Really?” Matteo asked, leaning up a bit more so he could see the hurt on David’s face, and he grinned, and questioned, “not even guitar? Or ukulele? Even I can play those a bit.”

“Nope,” David sulked, “nothing. One time my friend gave me her violin to try and she said I should be banned from ever touching anything with strings again.”

Matteo covered his mouth with his hands to stop the giggles that were threatening to pour out of him. It wasn’t like there was any actual expectation that David was able to play every single instrument that existed, but the shame he seemed to be feeling about his own inability was hilarious.

“Now you have to tell me something else too,” David said, poking Matteo in the cheek, obviously trying to change the subject,

“You offered that information up freely, I don’t have to tell you shit.” Matteo snarked back. He was still reeling from how strange this new dynamic was, and he wanted to push a bit, see what was allowed.

David scrunched his face up before suddenly grabbing Matteo’s wrist and flipping him onto his back, David hovering over him, looking much too pleased with himself. Once he could tell Matteo wasn’t going to try to move he slid his hand off his wrist and down his chest, onto his hip, and blinked his dark eyes slow and said, “Tell me something.”

“I can speak Italian,” Matteo blurted out immediately, unable to resist a hot, mostly naked boy pinning him to his bed.

“Oh yeah?” David asked with a grin, “Fluently?”

“Yeah,” Matteo said, his eyes wide as he stared up at David, “my dad’s from Italy, we spoke it when I was growing up.”

David hummed, still looking down at Matteo with the same cocky smile on his face, and said, “Say something.”

“No,” Matteo refused, and with a sudden burst of confidence he slid his hand onto the back of David’s head and said, “kiss me.”

David’s eyes widened but he smiled, and did as told. The conversation ended there.

*****

A few days later, a weekend, Matteo walked out onto his balcony. It was midday, and he had already eaten and gotten the work done for his academic classes, so he had an unlit joint dangling between his lips. He stretched, and squinted when the sun shone down on him bright enough to hurt his eyes. He dashed back into his room, intent on finding the sunglasses he knew were somewhere, and he saw something balanced against the wall in the corner that made him pause.

It was a ukulele, his ukulele, one that a random family member had gotten him when he was first accepted to the school. It was a bright blue, and Matteo knew that with most instruments a bright color didn’t ensure the best quality, but he didn’t mind because he barely played the thing. It was good enough for the random time every few months where Matteo would decide to teach himself a new song.

He thought back on his conversation with David. He felt the corners of his lips twitch up, remembering David’s pained face when he revealed his secret, and with a small laugh he grabbed the neck of the ukulele and tucked it under his arm. He found his sunglasses on the floor next to his desk, and slid them onto his face before walking back out the door.

He leaned against the railing of the balcony as he lit the joint, smiling around it, and puffing the smoke out his nose. His room faced out to an empty street, across from a bunch of buildings that he was sure nobody had gone inside for years. He liked how private it felt, for the years he had lived there he had only seen a handful of people out there.

Which made it the perfect place for him to pluck out a few random chords on the ukulele without the judgement he usually faced when playing music. He wasn’t good by any means, but he knew enough chords to play enough songs to keep himself occupied. There were even a few times when he and Jonas had played together out there, usually after a few beers or joints when Matteo was feeling less self conscious about giggling as he badly played along with Jonas actually playing his guitar.

He puffed on the joint, his eyes closing under the sunglasses as he started strumming. His fingers had settled naturally on the frets, playing the chords to the last song he had taught himself, one Jonas had played in his car that got stuck in Matteo’s head. He hummed along, but stopped when the joint almost fell out of his mouth. He took a step back, rolled his shoulders, and started playing again.

The joint did fall out of his mouth, tumbling to the ground at Matteo’s feet, thankfully not setting anything on fire, when he heard from the street below him, “Matteo?”

Oh god, he recognized the voice immediately. He bent down to grab the joint and stubbed it out on the ashtray conveniently right next to him, and took a deep breath before peeking over the railing. And he was right about the voice, as David was standing there, a hand over his eyes to shield them from the sun, squinting up at the balcony.

“Uh, yeah,” Matteo called back, lifting a hand to wave awkwardly before realizing that he was still clutching the ukulele, so he set it down, his fingers tight around the neck, “that’s me.”

“Nice shades.” David said, smirking up as he moved his hand from his eyes. The sun was going behind some clouds so the glare was gone, and Matteo lifted the sunglasses from his eyes with a blush.

“What are you doing over here?” Matteo asked, leaning over the edge so he could get a closer look. David had a bike next to him, and a backpack tight on his back, obviously either coming or going from somewhere.

“Oh, well, actually,” David said, digging the toe of his shoe into the ground like he was embarrassed by the question, “I was just taking a shortcut.”

Matteo snorted, and looked down at his arms folded across the railing. He didn’t really know what to say. He wasn’t expecting to see David obviously, and it didn’t seem like David’s answer matched his reaction to the question. He wanted to know what that was about. After an almost awkward silence, just as David’s hand tightened around the handle of his bike, Matteo quickly asked, “Do you want to come up?”

Something about David made Matteo do that a lot, blurt out things that drifted through his head that he wouldn’t usually say without a second more to think about it. He blushed after he asked, looking down at his arms again, not wanting to watch David uncomfortably decline. Sometimes it was hard to remember that they weren’t really supposed to like each other.

“Okay.” David said, confidently, and Matteo’s eyes snapped back down. David was looking up at him with his head tilted, a smile on his face like Matteo’s question was a challenge.

“Oh,” Matteo responded, needing to take a minute to realize that David was actually agreeing, “um, go around the front and I’ll buzz you in?”

David nodded, and hopped on his bike and disappeared around the corner of the building. Matteo let out a breath and rushed into his room, looking around with wide eyes to see what he needed to quickly kick under his bed and shove in his closet. He managed to tidy his room up enough to not be embarrassed by the time the buzzer went off, and Matteo ran to it, not even knowing if Jonas was home but desperately hoping he wasn’t.

He pulled the door open, biting his lip when David came into view, smiling slightly in that cocky way he did. He felt like he would swallow his tongue if he spoke out loud so he waved David into the flat, blushing at the chuckle David let out as he did so, and David bowed his head as he walked in, stepping past Matteo and stopping in the entrance to the main part of the flat.

“We should go chill on your balcony,” David said, looking around like he had never been there before. To be fair, the only time David had been there they were stumbling through the dark to Matteo’s room trying to keep their lips connected, so he didn’t blame him for taking the time to look around in the daylight.

Matteo nodded, and then realizing he hadn’t actually said anything since David came up, cleared his throat and said, “Yeah, sure.”

He led an amused David through his room, pointedly avoiding looking at his bed, his face flushing although he kept his eyes trained forward. David didn’t say anything, or even show in any way that he remembered the fact that just days ago they had been wrapped up in each other in that very same bed, kissing and touching and a lot else. Matteo didn’t know how he was so nonchalant about it when the sight of the bed instantly brought the taste of David’s lips to Matteo’s head, the feeling of his hands on him, Matteo’s hands in his hair. He shook his head and pulled the door to the balcony open harder than he meant to.

He was glad that they had chairs set out on the balcony, ones they had found outside some other building when they first moved in. They didn’t match but they were surprisingly comfortable and most importantly, not broken. Matteo only sat after David had picked a chair, and looked up at him, an amused smile still on his face.

“I should tell you that I lied, earlier.” David said suddenly, after Matteo sat. He looked up, confused, at David’s smile.

“Lied about what?”

“I wasn’t really taking a shortcut.”

Matteo raised an eyebrow, “Oh?”

David nodded, and bent down, digging around in the backpack at his feet. Matteo settled back in his seat to watch until David sprang back up with a book in his hand.

“Don’t tell anyone,” David started, flipping to a page near the end, “but I might sometimes sneak into buildings in a way that isn’t totally...legal.”

Matteo smiled at that, tilting his head, and asked, “For any particular reason, or do you just like the thrill?”

David smiled back, not cocky, and said, “It is pretty thrilling, especially when you get chased out by security guards. But I really do it for this.”

His cheeks got a little rosy when he handed the book over to Matteo, and Matteo’s jaw dropped when he looked down at the page. He was expecting words, but instead there was a sketch done in black pencil, and it took Matteo a minute to piece together what it was.

[idk dude figure out what he drew i guess lmao i dont care enough to try to write this part rn]

“These are… really good,” Matteo said, flipping through the pages. He didn’t really know if David wanted him to but he didn’t try to stop him, so Matteo let his eyes wander over the pages.

“Yeah, well,” David said, sounding a little sheepish, “it’s a hobby, I guess.”

Matteo was quiet as he turned page after page, finding sketches of more abandoned buildings, random people, different plants. A cat popped up a few times, which made Matteo smile, along with the doodles of instruments and staff lines half filled with notes. He didn’t realize how long he had been absorbed in the book until he noticed he was on the second to last page. He stared at the drawing that seemed somewhat familiar, a barely-started portrait, a head with short swooping hair, a button nose, a small smile-

“Okay, um,” David said quickly, his hand darting out to grab at the book, “yeah, a lot of those last ones aren’t finished. Not really that interesting.”

“I thought they were,” Matteo muttered, a little annoyed at being interrupted. He had been enjoying himself.

“I, uh,” David started as he shoved the book back into his bag, “don’t usually show that to people.”

Matteo tilted his head. He had never seen David look less sure of himself. He leaned back in the chair, biting his lip, his eyes avoiding Matteo’s. He seemed almost… shy? Timid? Words that Matteo would never associate with David.

“Well, you should,” Matteo said after a moment of silence, “it sucks that you’re amazing at that too.”

That got a bit of a chuckle, and Matteo grinned at David until their eyes met. There was a beat, and then David looked away again.

“I don’t know,” David said, his cheeks getting pink again, “that’s something I really only do when I need to escape. I just… go somewhere, and draw whatever I can find. I don’t really show people because I’m not doing it for anyone else. Like… you know.”

Matteo had a million questions about what he meant by that, but David had crossed his arms over his chest and looked off to the side after saying it, his jaw set. He let out a long exhale through his nose, and Matteo got the hint that he didn’t want to further dissect that statement.

Matteo leaned back in his chair, quiet, trying to figure out how to turn the conversation back around. He could tell David maybe hadn’t meant to say as much as he did, maybe was a little embarrassed at revealing something so personal. Showing off a picture of his cat a week or so prior was nothing compared to talking about something that he was actively keeping to himself. His escape, from what Matteo knew was a very stressful and hectic life.

He thought for a moment, his eyes darting around the balcony to find something to change the topic, to stop David from looking so uncomfortable. His eyes landed on his ukulele. He paused there, the thought alone making his heart race and something nervous twist up in his stomach, but before he could stop himself he reached out and grabbed it, letting it settle in his arms the way it always did. David didn’t look over until Matteo accidentally twanged one of the strings.

“Um,” he said, when David’s eyes widened and a grin started growing over his face, “I’ll trade you.”

The grin stopped, David tilted his head in confusion and asked, “You’ll trade me what?”

“You told me about what you do that’s just for you, that you don’t usually share with other people,” Matteo strummed, quickly adjusting a couple of the tuning pegs until the sound was just right, “only fair that I do the same.”

“I didn’t think that playing the ukulele was that important to you.”  David said, uncrossing his arms, relaxing back into his chair a bit. The tension was gone from his face, and his lips were curved up at the sides.

“It’s not,” Matteo said with a smirk that looked more confident than he felt, and he took a deep breath before putting his fingers on the frets.

He started strumming the song he had been playing when David showed up, looking down at his hands because he knew he would need to focus on the chords and not on David looking at him. He took another deep breath, tried not to think about it, and started singing.

“There once was a bittersweet man and they called him Lemon Boy….”

Matteo hadn’t considered the lyrics before singing them, just picking a song that was fresh in his head so he wouldn’t embarrass himself by messing up, not that David would have been shocked by that. It was a simple song, pretty, one that he didn’t have to think too hard about. But as he sang it, as the lyrics came out of his mouth less timid with every word, he felt butterflies in his stomach. He got to the chorus, and closed his eyes.

“Lemon Boy and me started to get along, together,” he sang, ignoring the heat he could feel spreading across his cheeks, “I helped him plant his seeds and we'd mow the lawn in bad weather.”

Matteo stumbled on a chord, managed to fix it in a second but he knew David heard it. He continued, though. David had reminded him of that often, not to stop when he made a mistake.

“It’s actually pretty easy being nice to a bitter boy like him...”

He sang the next verse, getting a little sloppy with the chords as he failed to not think about the words he was singing. He got through it, got halfway through the next chorus, and was suddenly cut off when loud classical music started playing from David’s bag. His hands stilled, and he opened his eyes.

It was as if David hadn’t even noticed he stopped, or the sound coming from somewhere near his feet. His eyes were wide, shiny and dark, staring into Matteo’s, leaning forward in his chair like he didn’t want to miss a single word, a single strum of Matteo’s fingers over the strings. His head was tilted, lips parted just enough that a long shaky breath could escape, his hands gripping tight to the arms of the chair. He looked awed by Matteo’s mediocre performance.

David’s gaze snapped down to his bag when the classical music started again, and he whispered an, “Oh, shit,” as he dug through it. He pulled his phone out and Matteo expected him to put it to his ear, assuming the music was a ringtone, but instead he could see it was an alarm that David turned off with a slide of his finger across the screen.

“I was supposed to be home a while ago, I need to, uh,” David cut himself off as he stood, shoving his phone into his pocket and zipping his bag closed before swinging it onto his back, “I have to do my shot today.”

“Oh,” Matteo responded, not understanding what David meant. He wasn’t able to say anything else, like singing had taken the rest of his voice for the day.

“You know, testosterone?” David stuttered out, nervous, as if Matteo didn’t already know he was trans.

“Oh,” Matteo said again, almost smacking himself in the face when he blurted out, “have fun?”

That made David pause, his franticness to leave slowing as a smile grew over his face. He bit his lip, and then to Matteo’s shock, let out a laugh.

“I’ll try my best,” he said, winking. That action alone was enough to have Matteo collapsing back into his chair. David turned towards the door, put one foot back into the apartment, and then stopped before saying, “oh, and Matteo?”

“Yes?” Matteo said, leaning forward again, greedy to hear whatever David was about to say.

“One day I’ll show people my art. Have an exhibit at a museum, maybe.” he said, turning his head so he could look back at Matteo with a soft smile on his face, “but only if I can hire you to sing there.”

Matteo’s jaw dropped, his face turning bright red as David walked through the door. He flopped back in his chair, waited until he could hear the clicks of his door opening and then closing, and let out the breath he had been holding for who knows how long.

[milkttea]

can you do some mha boys save you from someone who wont take no for an answer? I dont know if this is your style but i really love your writing! <3

Of course I can! Thank you so much for sending an ask!! Btw I write for just about anything LOL so don’t be afraid to ask!

Also Happy New Year! This year has been tough for everyone so I hope this will help to lessen your nerves! Consider it my gift to you and everyone else!

You were minding your business in the city, having just finished your work for the day. It wasn’t too late in the evening, it just turned to four when you left your apartment. 

While you were walking around you got hungry and deciding that you definitely were not in the mood for cooking, but also not eating something completely unhealthy, you went to a take out place that you frequented.

In line, you’d already decided on what you were going to order before you even walked through the door, you’ve ordered from there that many times. Anyway, you didn’t notice the eyes of a man lingering on your form in a disrespectful way. Disgusting we hate to see it, kill all men.

Getting your food and leaving the little take out restaurant you failed to notice the same man following you out of the restaurant and trailing after you. This didn’t go unnoticed to the hero who happened to be on duty and noticed the man following you out of the restaurant.

At first, he didn’t think much of it and resorted to lightly following you with his eyes. It was when the same man turned to the same street as you did and grabbed your arm that he finally went to see if you may need help.

When you felt your arm get grabbed you immediately became filled with anxiety, turning you met eyes with a man that just screamed danger. 

“Sorry miss, I just couldn’t help but notice your carrying some heavy bags, do you need some help carrying them back to your house?”

That raised red flags immediately in you and putting on the nicest smile you could while trying to not cry you just shook your head.

“No thank you, I’m fine!” You tried to take your arm out of his grip, but his hold only got tighter, “really it’s fine, thank you for offering to help me though.” Your hands were shaking and you felt like throwing up.

“I’m just trying to be nice here, lady. Geez, what you can’t be nice anymore?! I’m trying to help you!“

The man was now yelling at you and his grip on your arm got impossibly tighter and you guessed there would be a bruise there by tonight. 

“Sir please I appreciate the offer, but I really don’t need your help,“ you tried to reason with him.

“You’re so fucking ungrateful, I’m trying to help you you fucking bitch!“

Things were quickly escalating as the man gripped both of your arms now and squeezed them very tightly.

“You’re hurting me! Please let go!”

Before the man could do even more damage a hand reached out to grab his arms and pin them behind his back. Your eyes which had been previously closed opened as you feel the hands of your harasser leave you. Looking at the man you see the pro hero Deku with an angry expression directed towards the man who’s face contorts in pain.

 Deku in question looks away from the man and turns to look at you, his face immediately changing from anger to concern. He quickly takes a capture weapon, typically used on villains, and ties the mans hands together then to his feet.

He makes quick work to look at your arms and check for any injuries you may have gotten.

“I’m so sorry I should have acted quicker I just wasn’t sure what this man was planning on doing and-”

He continues to mutter as he fiddles with your arms, holding them much gentler than he did with the tied up man. You just stare at him in wonder, you’ve never met a pro hero before much less one of the most popular and top pro hero.

“I- thank you so much for helping! I wasn’t sure what would happen, honestly thank you so so much!”

He nods and breathes a sigh of relief, which then moves to concern when you wince and let out a whine at a particular spot he rubbed on your arms. The sound led to less than respectful thoughts and made his face warm up, but he pushed them aside in favor of making sure you were feeling better. 

“Yeah, still pretty upset at myself for not helping sooner though, um do you need any help because I know you can carry the bags yourself but your arm looks pretty bad right now and you winced when I pressed a little hard and the bags might make it worse and I don’t want you to get hurt even more if I can help it-”

You laugh a little at his muttering, it was kind of cute and fit him perfectly.

“Um yeah- I could use the help but just for a bit after all your a pro and there are much more people who need help than me!”

“Oh it’s fine really I don’t mind helping!”

He proceeds to help you carry the bags you have after taking the man to a police station to report him for harassment. You both make idle chatter as you head to your apartment.

“Hey asshole! Leave the girl alone!”

The man, startled, turns around your forearms still in hand and somehow grips them tighter as his eyes land on a less than pleased pro hero. Realizing that he’s been caught he lets go of your arms and stutters out.

“I was just offering to help her! She was being ungrateful!“

This truly was the weakest excuse he could have ever given because the look on Bakugou’s face said it all.

“Don’t try to lie scumbag, I saw you follow her out the restaurant and harass her.”

The man realizing that Bakugou wouldn’t let up he stupidly tries to make a run for it. Bakugou having quick reflexes puts his hand over your eyes and lets off a flash bang that stops the man in his tracks as he furiously rubs his eyes.

“If there's one thing I hate it’s guys that can’t take a NO especially when a person tells you repeatedly.”

Bakugou says this as he grips the mans arm and leads his away to a nearby cop and explains the situation with a huff. He returns to where you are as you just stare at him for a brief second, before eventually letting out a small thank you as you rub at your arms to try to relieve the pain from the tight grip of the man.

“She was an ungrateful bitch! I offered to help her for free! You here me you ungrateful who-!”

Bakugou shares a look with the cop before hitting the guy in the neck, effectively knocking him unconscious. He talks with the cop before making his way back to you.

He notices you rubbing your arm and makes a face.

“Hey

Considering that this whole thing started with you refusing you would accept anyway, but considering the fact that your arms were now in pain it would probably be best for you to get some help.

“Thank you for your help! I really appreciate it.“

You rub your arms as Bakugou looks at you briefly, before letting a slight smile show up on his face.

“Should probably take self defense classes dumbass, you could have seriously gotten hurt,“ Bakugou responds as he follows your lead to your apartment. He didn’t know why he offered to help you, maybe because he felt like you were weak.

Either way, you were happy for his help and waved goodbye to him once you got back into your apartment and gave him a smile.

Ice shot out from seemingly nowhere and froze the mans legs to the ground, the action surprised him and caused him to let go of your arms and you hurriedly backed away from him.

Shocked at what just happened you look around before your eyes land on the pro hero Shoto who offers a slight nod as he goes towards the man with a less than pleasant expression on his face.

“Hey what the hell man?! I was helping the dame out and she wouldn’t take my fucking help! Freeze her not me!”

Todoroki now on the scene blankly states at the man who tries to free himself from the ice as his face lowers into a harsh glare.

“You were harassing this young lady and wouldn’t leave her alone, learn to take no for an answer.”

He freezes the mans hands and legs together before going to your side and making an ice chunk to put on your arms.

“I apologize for not coming earlier I didn’t realize his intentions, I should have acted sooner,” he says with regret laced in his voice.

A little shiver runs down your spine at the feeling of the ice block on your arms, but you offer a smile to him in gratitude.

“I’m just glad you were here when you were, Shoto,” you respond with a slight blush on your face at how close he was.

His face wasn’t too better as he forgets for a brief second that his hero name was his first name, he decided he liked the way his name sounded coming from you. Using his quirk to cool down his face he looks at your bags that have since fallen on the floor.

“I could help you bring your stuff back to wherever to you need to go? Your arms don’t seem too injured, but straining them won’t do you any good,” he hoped he didn’t sound rude, thankfully he didn’t and you let out a slight laugh.

“Yeah I guess you’re right, kind of need my arms to work at their best for my job and life really.”

Todoroki picks up your bags and walks with you towards your residence, waving down an officer on the way and pointing them towards the man who harassed you.

[writingmyanxietyaway]

Cloacked Heart | Jackson Avery

Requested by anon:  Hi😊💕 Are you taking requests? Also, I wanna tell you that your works are very good💯👏👏👌🏻 and then, I was thinking on using “Oh, do you ever shut up?”; “You can call me whenever you want.. Even if you don’t have a reason to.”; “Tell me I’m wrong.” where the reader is DeLuca's sister and gets to work for the first time with Jackson but they don't get very well at first :) xx

Word count: 2.7k

Warning: none

Note: not my gif! kinda enemies to lovers

Thank you so much, darling! It really means the world to me :) Hope you like it xx

#11 - ‘Oh, do you ever shut up?’

#46 - ‘You can call me whenever you want.. Even if you don’t have a reason to.’

#67 - ‘Tell me I’m wrong.’

------------

Today was your third week at your new job. Thanks to your brother Andrew, you got in at Grey Sloan Memorial Hospital. Before, you worked in a hospital on the other side of the country which you thoroughly enjoyed but due to staff cuts, you had to leave. Being incredibly good at what you do, you got offered some jobs but none of them interested you. So Andrew spoke to his superior and got you a job as an attending in OB/GYN. Your sister Carina worked in OB/GYN also, so that’s where your fascination and passion for this specialty came from.

‘Hey, Y/N! How’s moving in going?’ Arizona asked, handing you a coffee. You took a sip and let the hot beverage slip down your throat. Warmth spread through your whole body as you enjoyed the bitter taste on your tongue.

‘It’s going okay, actually. All I need to do is paint the walls and I’m done,’ you nodded contently. Moving in was less stressful than you thought it would be, thanks to your newly made friends here at Grey Sloan. Arizona was the first person Andrew introduced you to and since he’s her roommate and head of Ped’s, you knew you would most likely see each other more.

‘Cool! Hey, you wanna come over for dinner on friday? I’ll kick Andrew out and we can have a girls night. If you want I’ll invite the other girls too,’ she said, pointing to the three sisters at the end of the hallway who waved at you.

‘Yeah, that would be fun. If it’s not a bother to you, that is,’ you said. You hated being a bother to anyone and always did your best to keep to yourself. Especially since you were new, you didn’t want to intrude. All of the staff seemed really close to each other by what you had seen so far.

‘Oh it’s no problem at all!’ she waved off, ‘And besides, after such a stressful time you deserve a glass of wine. Or bottle.’ She winked at you and left to check up on het patients. You knew you had surgery tonight, so you decided to lay down for a little in one of the on-call rooms. Thinking about your life before and now made you smile. The job you had was great, but they didn’t let you do what you did best; save lives and deliver babies. There was always someone who was better than you or stole your patients. It was unfair and definitely uncalled for, but being here made you feel appreciated and welcomed. You hadn’t met everyone yet, but so far you got along with everyone.

You heard a knock on the door and got up. It was one of the interns who told you the surgery had been moved to the afternoon. You decided to check on the patient before surgery, but someone already beat you to it. A man was talking to your patient. He was tall, muscular and had piercing blue eyes. You knew it was Jackson Avery, as you had seen on the board earlier today, but you had yet to meet the man. Your breath hitched for a moment and that caught the attention of both your patient and the still unknown man.

‘Hi, sorry to interrupt. I’m doctor DeLuca. I’ll be performing your surgery with doctor Avery,’ you introduced yourself to the patient with a smile. She shook your hand and then turned her attention back to Jackson. He explained every step of the surgery. She was pregnant with twins, but her skin had been completely stretched out, making the continuation of the pregnancy very dangerous. You would deliver both babies safely while Jackson restored the skin. It wasn’t a risky procedure, but it did require some skills. Hence the two of you being here. Once he was done explaining, she felt safe enough and two interns took her to pre-op. You handed the tablet to one of the nurses, who you remembered was called Linda, and turned to Jackson.

‘I don’t believe we’ve met yet. I’m Y/N DeLuca, ’ you said with a smile and held out your hand for him to take. He shook it and nodded at you.

‘Jackson Avery. Let me be clear straight away. Don’t try anything funny with me or anyone in this hospital. This hospital is funded with the money I provided, so this placed is owned by me, no matter what anyone says. I can kick you out as easily as you came in. So, let’s do this surgery, because I have more to do today.’ Not waiting for an answer, he turned around and left to prep for surgery. You stared at him until he left and shook yourself out of your haze. What crawled up his ass and died?

When you tried to leave, you bumped into Andrew.

‘Hey, Annie,’ you asked, hearing him groan behind you. You had called him that since you caught him singing along to Annie: The Musical one night. He hated it ever since, but after doing it for so long his actual name sounded weird so you just kept using it. ‘Is Jackson always such an ass?’ You turned around and watched his face turn into a frown.

‘No.. most of the time he’s the nicest guy around, why?’ he asked. He saw you frowning and stepped towards you, placing a hand on your shoulder. ‘Did he do something?’ 

Your sister was older than you and he was younger, making you the middle child, but he always protected you like an older brother. Whenever you felt sad or angry, you came to him first before anyone else.

‘No, nothing happened. I just introduced myself and he started going on about me not trying anything funny here because he could kick me out if he wanted to,’ you mumbled.

‘Hmm.. maybe he has a bad day? I can talk to him if you want me to?’

‘No, it’s okay. I’ve got surgery with him, so I’ll talk to him. I gotta go, see you tonight?’ you asked. He nodded and smiled. 

‘Goodluck, peanut! Page me if you need anything.’

You scrubbed, changed into different clothes and stared operating. You could see how tense Jackson still was, so you tried to lighten the mood.

‘So, Jackson, how long have you been here for?’ you asked. Your hands worked flawlessly and Jackson noticed. He was pissed off at someone new coming to work at the hospital again, thinking it would only cause more drama again, but you seemed actually nice and talented. It sparked a little jealousy in him that he hadn’t felt before.

‘Long enough,’ he grumbled. You couldn’t help but notice how attractive he was. His eyebrows were furrowed and he watched the skin he worked on closely. You had seen his work before and it was incredible.

‘Okay, well..’ you started, ‘Not to kiss your ass or anything, but I think you’re a great surgeon and I am really looking forward to working with you more in the future.’

There was no response as you continued on delivering the babies. You soon delivered a boy and shortly after a little girl.

‘There they are. Please take them to either doctor Robins or Karev. They’ll check up on them and inform the parents. I’ll be right there,’ you told the interns with a smile and they quickly left.

‘That was really nice, you know.. Saving the hospital and all. I couldn’t-’ you got cut off by a load groan of Jackson.

‘Oh, do you ever shut up?’

Shocked at his sudden snap, your hands froze and your breath hitched. He seemed to be okay with what he said, since he just kept going. What you didn’t know was that he didn’t mean to snap. It was like he lost control over his mouth, because when the words left his lips, he was shocked himself. Snapping at a woman like that was very unlike him, so when you mumbled out a sorry, he wanted to apologize, but the words were stuck in his throat.

-

The ‘shut up’ incident had been almost a year ago. You had worked with him a few times after that and he talked to you more often now, but luckily Arizona offered to take your surgeries with him so you could take over hers. She had truly been your best friend since you started at Grey Sloan, besides April. The three of you got along incredibly well and you even went out for dinner once a month. Andrew and you had switched apartments, so you now lived with Arizona and he lived in your apartment.

It was saturday and you were about to leave, but you wanted to check on you patient Amy one last time before she left. She was allowed to leave tomorrow and you had the day off, so you wouldn’t see her anymore. Sofia was 18 and was now a mother of a healthy baby girl. Her parents refused to see her as they were religious and didn’t approve of their daughter having sex before marriage. So you kind of took her under your wing until she left.

‘How are you holding up?’ you asked her, sitting on the end of her bed. She smiled at the little peanut laying on her chest as she wrapped her little hand around Amy’s finger. 

‘I’m okay. I guess all the cliché’s are true. Whenever I look at her everything just falls away. I’m going to be okay. We will be okay. I know we are,’ she spoke and you felt extremely proud of her. When she came in, she was terrified, alone and hurt. Now, she was all grown up and not scared of what the future would bring.

‘I’m proud of you, Amy. I really am. You have my number, so if anything happens or if you need anything, just give me a call, okay?’ She nodded and you hugged her goodbye. You caressed the little girl over the head and was about to leave when suddenly her heartbeat picked up and she started seizing. You took the child away as you yelled at nurses to help you, but to no avail. She had a heart attack and didn’t survive. The baby was taken away to the pediatric wing and her body was taken to the morgue. You sat in the middle of the room, staring at the place Amy laid alive and smiling just a little over an hour ago. Your bottom lip trembled and you could feel your throat closing up as you choked back a sob.

Jackson was about to leave too, when he saw you sitting alone in an empty room quietly crying to yourself. He glanced around to see if anyone knew what you were doing there, but when he saw no one even noticed you were sitting on your own, he stepped in. 

‘What are you doing here?’ he softly asked you. He noticed you tensing up, but something inside him told him you needed someone to be there for you. Clearly you were shaken up, so he couldn’t just leave you here alone. He grabbed a chair and sat down next to you. He followed your gaze and it didn’t take long for him to realise you’d lost a patient.

‘How old was she?’ he whispered. You let out a shaky breath and wiped away your tears.

‘Eighteen. Heart attack,’ you whispered back, your voice breaking. His heart clenched when he saw you so broken. You always wandered and skipped around the halls, a smile on your face and carrying positivity with you everywhere you went. Seeing tears falling down your cheeks and a frown on your face was nothing like you.

‘I’m sorry,’ he said, placing a hand on your thigh. You felt a spark of electricity flow through your body and turned to face him. His eyes held remorse and his eyebrows were furrowed in worry.

‘I’m sorry too.’

You two sat like this for a few minutes. Sitting in silence cleared your head. You enjoyed Jackson’s company and it made you feel safe and warm to know he wanted to know if you were okay.

‘Come on. I’ll take you home,’ he offered, holding out his hand for you to take. You gladly took it and placed the chairs back on their spots. You got in his expensive car and silently drove to Arizona’s and your place. When you arrived, you didn’t get out right away.

‘Thank you Jackson. You didn’t have to do that, wait for me, I mean. But thank you for waiting and being there. I appreciate it,’ you told him, not daring to look him in the eyes. You could see him nod in the corner of your eye.

‘No problem. If you need anyone, you can call me whenever you want.. Even if you don’t have a reason to.’ 

Your heart fluttered at his words and you blushed. He reached out for your hand and kissed the top of it.

‘Goodnight, Jackson. Thanks again.’

-

Three years you had been working here. Since the passing of your patient, you and Jackson got along surprisingly well. Others seemed to notice as well, because both of you got invited to parties and dinners more, because you finally could be in a room with each other without one killing the other. Either of you were unaware of the feelings you shared for each other, that seemed to increase more every day.

‘Hey Jackson, wanna come over for dinner tonight? Arizona is out and I don’t wanna sit alone all night,’ you asked him, flopping down on the couch next to him. He seemed to ignore you as he continued playing on his phone.

‘Jackson? Are you okay?’ you asked again, this time softer and turning your body to look at him. You saw him swallow thickly and nervously play with his beard. It felt like a slap to the face when he ignored you. After three years you could finally have a decent conversation and now he was shutting you out again..? It simply didn’t make sense.

‘Did I do something wrong?’ you whispered. You swallowed the lump in your throat and Jackson finally looked up at you. He had to say it. It was now or never.

‘Tell me I’m wrong,’ he stated. His eyes held fear as he looked you in the eyes.

‘Wrong about what?’ you asked, eyebrows furrowing in confusion. ‘Jackson, what’s going on?’ Placing a hand on his knee, his eyes flickered from your hand to your face.

‘Tell me I’m right to believe you share the same feelings I have for you,’ he breathed out. Your heart beat loudly in your ears and you felt like he could hear it. He placed his hand over yours that laid on his knee and interwined your hands. You couldn’t believe it. Taking you silence as an answer, he chuckled bitterly and let go of your hand.

‘I guess I was wrong,’ he mumbled, standing up. You quickly stood up too.

‘I want to tell you you’re wrong, but that would be a lie. And I can’t lie; not to you. I actually wanted to tell you the same. Tonight. If you wanted to of course.’ You stumbled over your words as you tried to tell him how you felt. He chuckled at your rambling and he cut you short by placing a hand in your neck and pulling you against him, kissing you softly. His lips were soft and full and he smelled amazing. You closed your eyes, wrapping your arms around his neck and standing in your tip toes to pull him closer.

‘Only if it’s a date and I cook for you,’ he whispered against your lips. You giggled and nodded, making him smile.

‘I’m sure we can arrange that.’

You leaned in again, but froze when you heard a voice behind you.

‘Oh come on! Not you too. Now I’ve lost both my sisters to my co-workers. I shouldn’t have offered you the job, damn it,’ Andrew grumbled.

‘Oh, shut it Annie. Your time will come,’ you called after him, earning a middle finger in return, making you and Jackson giggle.

[gladerwolfstarkimagines]

Imagine being Bolin’s best friend for years and harbouring feelings for him but managing to keep them hidden. Until Korra and Mako break Bolin’s heart and you accidentally confess your feelings to him...

You heard a faint crying noise getting louder and louder but didn’t realise it was Bolin until he threw the loft door open and you saw him crying his eyes out. Tears were streaming down his face and petals flowed around him as the flowers he held crumpled in his hands. He dropped them in a clump on the floor and rushed to his room slamming the door. You could still hearing him crying as he dramatically flung himself on the bed and buried his head in his pillow. "Bolin?" You called rushing to his door "Bolin? What’s wrong?". Bolin gave you a muffled reply full of tears and you had no idea what he said. "Erm can you repeat that?" you asked. Bolin did but it was even more hysterical then before and more of a screetch than anything. "Bolin please open the door so i can hear you better" you sighed trying the locked door handle anxiously. "Bolin!" you called when you didn’t get any reply. Suddenly the lock clicked and the door swung open. Pabu poked his head around and you realised the fire ferret had unlocked it for you. "Thanks buddy" you smiled and Pabu ran up your arm burying his head in your neck, apparently just as upset as Bolin. Bolin was laid limbs sticking out faced down on his bed, his head stuffed into a pillow which only slightly muffled his sobbing. You stroked Pabu and approached Bolin. "Bolin?" you called placing a hand on his back to let him know you were here. He jumped and turned his head to see you. "Hi Y/n" he sniffed still crying. "Hey" you said sitting down on the space beside him "wanna tell me what’s wrong?". Bolin sniffled for a while composing himself before he flopped onto his back dramatically, starfishing on the bed. He explained how he’d asked Korra out and their date went amazingly...but then not hours later he caught her and Mako kissing. Right after he’d just bought her flowers too. Bolin started crying again after he finished his story and you felt just as emotional, however your emotion was more anger. How dare Korra and Mako do this to him! Bolin was the sweetest, nicest, most gentlemanly man you’d ever met! Korra and Mako should've treated him better, they clearly didn’t realise what an amazing guy Bolin was. Right on time the door slammed open and Mako appeared. "Bolin" he said out of breath "Bolin don’t cry i’m sorry!". "Go away" Bolin yelled and you agreed. You rushed to stop Mako coming in the room knowing it’d make Bolin worse and pushed him hard in the chest. "Nope, i think you should leave him alone after what you’ve done". "After what i’ve done?" Mako asked and you nodded "was it someone else who kissed Korra?". "No but it wasn’t just me! Korra was there too!". "Yes but she has the decency to hide away while Bolin is...." you were thinking of a word to make Bolin’s current state less dramatic when Bolin started sobbing loudly again and you frowned "...processing". "Y/n come on!" Mako frowned and you glared "he is my best friend! It’s my job to protect him from people and look after him and right now that means getting you to leave him alone!". Mako rolled his eyes but you carried on glaring at him. "Fine just look after him please" Mako sighed and you raised an eyebrow "of course i will, i’d never hurt him". Mako sighed walking away defeated and you shut the door sharply. Bolin halted as Pabu jumped on him and looked at you "is he gone?". You nodded and sunk down beside Bolin. You laid beside him and frowned. You were never too good with words, Bolin was the talker in the friendship, you just listened so you didn’t know what to say to make him feel better. You thought about what Bolin would do if the roles were reversed and an idea came to you. You hugged Bolin tightly, knowing how much he loved to hug everyone and anyone and figured he needed one. Bolin was unresponsive at first but then turned into you and you wrapped your arms around him letting him bury his head against you. His shoulders shook as he carried on crying and you held him tighter, struggling not to get upset seeing your best friend so sad. Eventually the crying got quieter and quieter until it stopped. You still kept a hold of Bolin though and he still held onto you too. "I’m sorry" Bolin said suddenly "for being such a mess". "Don’t you dare apologise" you told him and he sniffed. "Is this not uncomfortable for you?" Bolin asked only now realising he was partially laying on you "i feel like im crushing you". Knowing Bolin secretly liked to be held and loved to be the little spoon you smiled and shook your head "nope you're pretty light". Bolin smiled and relaxed more against you. You patted his arm and sighed "you know Mako and Korra didn’t mean to hurt you right?". Bolin nodded "yeah...but it still sucks it’s just, i thought she....i thought she actually kinda liked me". Your heart broke to hear Bolin’s voice so small and unsure and you gripped him tighter. "She seemed to enjoy the date but i guess it was just as friends" Bolin sighed. "Well it’s her loss" you couldn't help but comment "Korra would be lucky to have you, any girl would!". "Yeah right...until Mako comes alone" Bolin smiled sadly "no girl would choose me over Mako". "That’s insane!" you said a little louder than you meant to "Bolin you have so many amazing qualities! You shouldn’t compare yourself to Mako, you’re Bolin and that would be amazing to a lot of girls..." you trailed off blushing. "Ow yeah like who" Bolin smirked and you paused. "Well me for instance". Bolin and even Pabu froze and looked at you. You panicked and back tracked "i just mean i’ve always thought you were the better brother...i never got why Mako got more attention, my attention was always captured by you and as we became friends that just grew and grew and erm...you said nobody would pick you over Mako but i would". "You would?" Bolin asked and you nodded "everytime". You could see Bolin trying to process everything in his head and were scared what he would think when he reached the correct conclusion you liked him which you’d made very obvious. "Well i’d best go now you’re feeling better" you said awkwardly and Pabu chittered to Bolin rapidly as you headed for the door. "Y/n wait!" Bolin called. He stumbled onto his feet knocking his small room apart as he lurched after you and nearly took you out as he crashed into the door forcing you to close it and kind of accidentally trapping you against it. "Y/n when you said all that..." he breathed haggerdly "did you mean...do you choose me? Do you like me? Not just compared to Mako but really like me?". Your heart was hammering so loudly you were suprised Bolin couldn’t hear it and you felt like the room had been heated rapidly. "I erm...i.." you babbled your throat now dry "i...i’ve always liked you" you gulped. "Always?" Bolin asked "all these years?". You nodded not sure if the shock on Bolin’s face was good or bad. "Always" you breathed. Bolin moved away from you and started pacing and you panicked. "Bolin i’m sorry" you cried "i shouldn’t have told you...it’s okay that you don’t like me, i gave up hoping anything would ever happen ages ago so it’s not like i’m expecting things i just thought you should know not every girl will overlook you and that you’re just as good as Mako...well i guess it’s better in my opinion but the principles the same" you stuttered but Bolin still had his back to you. "Bolin?" you asked scared. Bolin whipped around and you jumped back bumping into the door but Bolin followed you. His eyes were brighter than usual but his expression was unreadable "you like me?". You nodded "but as i was saying i don’t expect anything" when Bolin cut you off kissing you. It was only a quick kiss, Bolin broke it as abruptly as he started it, his eyes snapping open to look at you. Bolin checked your reaction as if not believing you at your word "you really like me?" he asked again and you nodded "yes".  Bolin grinned and kissed you again, this time for longer. You were pressed against the door as Bolin got overly excited and he apologised realising he’d almost pushed you up the door in his haste. "I can’t believe it" he breathed coming up for air "i always just thought we’d be good friends forever". "So you like me too?" you asked and Bolin blushed "i’ve had a crush on you for years, i actually made Mako swear never to date you". "You did?" you asked and Bolin nodded "i was too scared to ask you out but that didn’t mean i could handle Mako beating me to it...gosh if it’d been you and Mako i saw today..." Bolin trailed off going pale and you smiled pulling his face gently to make him look at you. "I wouldn’t do that because Mako is not the brother i like, it’s you Bolin". Bolin grinned picking you up effortlessly and moving you so you were no longer trapped against the door. Used to Bolin lifting you, you wrapped yourself around him and Bolin smiled tracing your cheek with his free hand (yes Bolin could lift you with one hand). "I’m never gonna tire of hearing you say that" he grinned and kissed you again.

Mako’s POV

Korra burst into Mako and Bolin’s apartment ready to force Bolin to accept her apology when she saw Mako relaxing on the sofa with Pabu, not a care in the world. He had a towel wrapped around his head covering his ears and Pabu had a little one around his head too. "Mako...why are you so calm? Where’s Bolin and what’s that on your head?". Mako moved her into the hallway and only then pulled the towel away. "Ow Bolin’s fine" he nodded. "How can he be? He was crying!". "Y/n" Mako said simply. Korra frowned "what does y/n have to do with it?". "I don’t know how but whatever we did made her confess her feelings and i think Bolin’s forgotten all about us". "He has? He’s okay?". "From the sounds of it" Mako winced and Korra stared confused before blushing "ow...oww wow". "Yeah can we go out please the towel only blurred so much and i can’t take much more". Korra nodded "come on i think we owe Bolin a night with y/n undisturbed".

The next morning

You awoke to sunlight streaming in through a window and it took you a second to realise that it wasn’t the usual view from your window. The previous evening’s events came flooding back and you looked behind you to see a very adorable bed head Bolin. Bolin was awake and smiled meeting your eye “good you’re awake!” he said shooting up”I was going to make breakfast but didn’t know what you wanted” he grinned at you. You blushed but we’re still in disbelief this was real, that things could be this perfect. “Do you want pancakes?” Bolin asked turning on his side to face you better “I can make pancakes and Mako bought blueberries yesterday!”. You nodded and Bolin jumped up to go make them. You we’re still worried though and called out to him. Bolin paused immediately at your tone and frowned sitting beside you “y/n what’s wrong?”. “Nothing” you sighed "just...Bolin what happened between us...you were upset and emotional so was that, did last night mean the same for you as it did for me?". Bolin frowned "what do you mean?". "Well was that...was I a distraction from Korra or do you really like me?". "Of course i like you" Bolin cried "i wouldn't have done that with you if i didn’t..." Bolin trailed off blushing "but i’m sorry it wasn’t the most romantic thing i guess". "No it’s fine" you smiled "i was just worried it was a convenient way for you to forget about Korra". "I haven’t thought about her since you told me you liked me" Bolin smiled "y/n i like you a lot and i know we did this backwards but i’d love to take you on a date". You smiled "how does tonight sound?". "Perfect" Bolin smiled “but first pancakes!”. Bolin kissed your cheek and then rushed out of the room. You laid back down and smiled, Korra's loss was definitely your gain.

[silenthearts]

I’m just your friendly neighbourhood Spiderman

Summary: You and Luke have a date planned but being the friendly neighbourhood Spiderman gets in the way of your plans

Genre: This is tooth rotting fluff, Luke helping old ladies, kittens and young boys and girls with their football skills!

Also this is set where Both Miles and Peter have retired from being Spiderman. You can send me ideas of what you’d want me to write about within the universe.

Requests are open , I’d love to write more Spiderman!Luke, I may even do a mood board

****

You had been looking forward to a date with Luke for ages, both of you had been extremely busy and with your hectic lives, it had been almost impossible to just have some time for yourselves.

But today you had an extra hour for lunch and Luke had been at university all day and the “superhero” side gig had been fairly calm, so you decided that you were both gonna grab some lunch and stroll around somewhere.

You left the office super excited as you could be a normal couple for at least an hour today. The spring air caressed your cheeks as you walked quite quickly towards the coffee shop you agreed to meet Luke at.

A smile was fixed on your lips the whole way, who knew a lunch date with your long-term boyfriend could be so exciting.

Luke stood leaning on the lamp-post in front of the coffee shop, two hot drinks in his hands as he looked around for your face in the crowd. You saw him from a distance as he looked around and avoided his gaze so you could surprise him. You slowly walked up behind the tall boy and tried to put your hands over his eyes, but failing miserably as he was too tall for you to completely cover his eyes. Instead, your hands awkwardly rested on his cheeks which made an audible giggle escape his lips.

“Guess who?” You said, trying to not laugh yourself.

“Oh, I don’t know, who could it possibly be?” He giggled, going along with your silliness. “Is it Mr stark?” He said jokingly which made you drop your hands. Luke turned around to face you and you giggled

“Close enough,” you said as he offered you your hot drink which you thanked him for with a little peck on his soft lips.

“So, where are we going?” He asked as you both started walking aimlessly in a random direction.

“I was thinking, maybe central park? Get a hot dog for lunch?” you suggested, your hand found his as your fingers interlaced. He nodded.

“Sounds like a plan!” he said excitedly and pulled you in the direction of central park. On the way, both of you talked about your day and how your apartment really needed a tidy and maybe a better paint job. Luke told you how the Spiderman gig had been quite quiet today and he almost didn’t know what to do with the normalcy of just being a student.

When both of you got to the park entrance and got two hotdogs from your favourite hot dog stand, Luke noticed an old lady who stood yelling up at a tree.

“C’mon  Snowball! You got up there, you need to get down!” Meows were heard from the tree but nobody seemed to be helping the poor lady, New Yorkers and tourists alike just ignored the old lady pleading at her cat who seemed to be stuck up the tree.

You observed Luke and just tapped him on the shoulder

“You can go help her” you smiled. Luke had a worried look on his face, his eyebrows knitted together as he restrained to not leave you on your date.

“But the date-” He tried to say but you just shook your head, “ I think she needs you more than I do, besides I get to annoy you at home every day.” he smiled and gave you a deep kiss as he ran away and left you with his food. You found a bench nearby and sat waiting for Spiderman to appear. You didn’t even wait a full five minutes when he came swinging down.

He swiftly landed near the old lady making her excitedly sigh in relief as she saw him and he walked in her direction.

“Do you need help mam?” he said politely, approaching her. His suit made you blush every time as he looked so handsome. Let’s just say you liked that the suit hugged him in all the right places.

“My snowball got up to that tree and I don’t want to pull his leash and make him fall” she explained and pointed up the tree where a fluffy Persian white cat stood on the tree branch.

Luke nodded “Don’t worry mam, I’ll bring your snowball back down safely!” With a web he pulled himself up the tree, at the point, there was a small crowd gathered around the tree, all looking up as he approached the little fluffy cat, at this point you observed him from a closer spot, and your heart couldn't help but feel tight and warm and Luke’s little soft voice as he tried to get the cat’s attention.

“Hello, snowball...” Luke said softly, his voice a bit muffled by his mask. The cat meowed and turned away from Luke. “Hey I know we don’t really know each other but like we are buddies now,” he spoke as he slowly made his way onto the same branch where snowball stood. The tree branch cracked under his weight and everyone let out a gasp as Luke steadied himself.

Snowball sat on the edge of the branch, it felt like he was mocking Luke on purpose. Snowball meowed in Luke’s direction as he slowly made his way further, maintaining his balance.

‘I know buddy but it’s time to come down” Luke whispered as he finally got a hold of the chubby and fluffy snowball, the circle of people underneath the tree all started clapping but it wasn’t long till the branch broke under Luke’s feet. Thankfully his fast reflexes made him shoot up a web that held him and snowball in place. The tree branch fell and Luke yelled for the crowd to disperse.

Thankfully everyone did and Luke slid down the web, snowball held in one of his arms, the crowd started clapping once again as he delivered the cat to the old lady who had small tears in the brim of her eyes. “There you go mam, safe and sound” He held out snowball to the old lady who held her beloved cat close to her chest.

“Thank you so much, you’re a very nice young man.” She said as she tapped his shoulder in reassurance, a wide smile plastered on her lips.

“Oh, thank you so much, it was a pleasure to help” Luke gave snowball one last tap on his little fluffy head “ You need to be more careful next time buddy.” He said happily with a giggle at the end. Everyone swarmed Spiderman but he made way so the old lady and her cat could safely exit the crowd of people who had formed around them.

He, of course, stood behind to greet fans and talk to everyone who wanted to talk to him, even taking a few silly selfies. Once people started dispersing, he made his way back to you, a smile was on your face and your cheeks were rosy from the slight chill in the air, and because your boyfriend was the kindest person you’ve ever met.

You sometimes wonder if these radioactive spiders just go around choosing and picking the nicest guys, sometimes it feels like it.

He finally approached you “Did you see that?” He said excitedly “I am your friendly neighbourhood Spiderman!” He giggled, Luke had wanted to just do that for a while, the big villains and steaks of the last few years had left him a bit fatigued and exhausted, he was happy to just save kittens from trees and stop bicycle robberies.

“You are indeed!” You exclaimed happily. Your moment just the two of you didn’t last long, however.

“Hey, Spiderman!” A kid yelled loudly from the little concrete football (soccer) field. “Do a flip!” Another little girl yelled. Luke laughed and happily obliged at the request, doing backflip which made the kids erupt into celebratory laughs and chants. Luke gave you a tilt of his head and you playfully rolled your eyes.

The kids yelled a request for Luke to join them for a football game and you nodded “Go on...” He excitedly made his way to the group of children, giving high fives to all the boys and girls who stood around him. Soon enough you sat at a park bench, eating your and Luke’s hot dogs as he played around with the children, letting them all play against him and consequently letting them win every game.

You knew your date got somehow pushed into the background, but there was nothing you enjoyed more than seeing Luke happy and doing what he liked most. His kindness with everyone overwhelmed your heart with happiness, You couldn’t have asked for anyone better than him, your friendly neighbourhood Spiderman.

****

Okay this made me soft, spiderman!luke is like one of my fav things to write atm. Mostly cuz I cant wait for the new Spiderman movie. I hope you enjoyed lovelies xx

[jerrylevitch]

Jane McCormick on her experiences with Jerry Lewis

Here’s her excerpts on Jerry Lewis from both books she authored, but first background info on her:

“I was beaten, raped, my leg has been broke, my neck has been broke, I’ve been shot at twice and left in the desert,” McCormick said in a recent interview. “I was like a freelancer in the casinos. I was introduced by the owners and pit bosses of the casinos. After being in Las Vegas for three months, everyone knew me.”

Being a pretty blonde with an outgoing personality and quick wit put her in the top 2% of prostitutes in Vegas, the ones who didn’t ever have to walk the streets.

She had champagne blonde hair, a knock-out figure, and a vivacious smile. But the glamour was all for show. But life as one of Las Vegas; top call girls was lonely, sad and marked by abuse. “The men always went home to their wives, to their homes, their families–and you are left alone.”.

She was 29 when she left the life and has had a lot of ups and downs since. She admitted it was a hard life to walk away from because of the money. For someone like her who never graduated high school, being a prostitute was a way to survive and support her 2 little girls.

She ALWAYS talks about Jerry in articles and interviews that she does, with nothing but good things to say about him.

And she points out some of his quirky beliefs on “cheating”…Apparently, Jerry believed that if he pulled out before he climaxed, no matter what type of relations he had with her~ he felt he wasn’t cheating. That was during his trying to be a better man for Patti phase that happened during the 60′s. Definitely he didn’t always do this while cheating.

Anyway here’s the chapter:

“Back at my apartment, I lay on my bed and cried. Every day I asked God to help me get out of this life. But then I stopped crying, took a shower, swallowed some pills, and went back to the casinos. My first stop was the Sands.  I stood and talked a few minutes to Bucky Harris, a pit boss there.

‘You know who’s here in the hotel’ Bucky asked.

‘I didn’t notice the billboard who is it’

‘Jerry Lewis’

‘Oh that crazy guy? He’s so funny!’

‘He is a fun guy. He’s in his room now. Why don’t you go surprise him? He starts his show tomorrow night, so he might have time for a pretty little thing like you.  Let me call and see if he wants me to send you to the cottage.’

Bucky went to call Jerry’s room from the house phone in the pit, the place where the bosses stand to watch the transactions of money and gambling. He came back saying ‘Go on over there.’

I was a little nervous. I had always thought Jerry Lewis was a great entertainer, never dreaming I would meet him, much less turn a trick with him. He opened the door to his suite.

‘Well, come on in sweetie. What’s your name?’

‘Jane Harvey’

‘That’s a pretty name. It fits that pretty face, Jerry said. ‘Sit down. Let’s have a drink.’

We sat there about two hours, laughing and telling jokes. I said I had always wanted to meet him, that I thought he was one of the greatest comedians in the world.

‘Do you like it when I do this?’ he asked. He stood then, stumbling around the room, being clumsy, feet and legs of jelly, doing his nerd routine. He cracked me up.

Jerry said I reminded him of someone he had noticed among the fans hanging around after his shows in New York.  On his way from the building was a staircase where the fans gathered to get his autograph. In the crowd, over a period of time, was a girl with a beautiful face, blonde hair, and green eyes. Jerry said he had never met her or talked with her, but she had always stuck in his mind.

‘And you, my dear, have that same face,’ he said. Then he did a little song and dance routine: ‘That face, that fabulous face…’ he chortled, doing a soft shoe shuffle across the carpet.

By this time, we’d had a few drinks and I’d noticed how soft-spoken he was, how serious he was off stage. He wasn’t at all the zany, crazy guy I’d thought. He told me how much he loved his family, and how hard he worked for the causes he promoted. He said he felt lonely on the road, and he was glad to meet such a sweet girl. Maybe, for a few moments, I could take some of the loneliness away. I was thinking about how handsome he was when he was serious, how sincere. I wished he weren’t attached because I felt attracted to him. I just loved him then, and I do to this day.

Jerry was almost bashful when it came to having sex, but he thoroughly enjoyed it. Still, he had a quirky way of dealing with his loyalty to his wife. He would not climax inside me, no matter what kind of sex we had.

Afterward, we had drinks, and Jerry took me to his car, a Lincoln, I think, and we went for a drive downtown.  He showed me the recording equipment he had installed in his car. He said he practiced many of his routines using that tape recorder, and played them back when he was driving. As we head back on Las Vegas Boulevard toward the Sands, we saw the sun coming up over Sunrise Mountain.

It was breathtaking! Jerry pulled his car to the side of the street, and we simply watched. Jerry said he loved the morning hours more than any part of the day. I told him I did too, but that I never got to see much of morning because I was just going to bed. He laughed. I think he liked my sense of humor.

‘I wish I had my airplane here. I love to go flying in the morning. It’s the most beautiful time of the day,’ he said.

At the Sands, Jerry drove into the circle drive in the wrong direction. He was still pretty drunk, and he was being crazy. He headed the Lincoln toward the curb, and drove up onto the sidewalk near the entrance of the casino.

‘I think we’ve landed,’ he screamed in his crazy, nerdy voice. Laughing like crazy, we jumped out of the car, ran into the casino, and out the side door by the pool. We both ran around the pool twice, yelling, before heading back to our room. We fell onto the bed in stitches. We had another drink. The Jerry said we’d better eat something, and sent for some sandwiches. I could tell he was tired, and I said I had to leave, that I had some important things to do.

Jerry invited me to his show that night. I accepted and really enjoyed it. He saw me in the crowd, and looked right down at me. He directed of the lines and antics in his routine straight at me. He was one of the nicest men I’d ever met.

Jerry just liked me. He liked to talk, and he felt comfortable with me. I knew that being a celebrity on the road could be hard and lonely. I think guys like Jerry thought of me as a breath of fresh air, because I saw them as the persons they were, and I talked down to earth with them as if we’d known each other for years."

-Breaking My Silence - Jane McCormick

" I was thinking about how handsome Jerry was when he was serious and sincere. He just liked me and my sense of humor. At the Sands, Jerry drove into the circle drive in the wrong direction. He headed the Lincoln toward the curb and drove up onto the sidewalk near the entrance of the casino. Laughing like crazy, we jumped out of the car, ran into the casino, and out the side door by the pool. We both ran yelling around the pool twice before heading back to the room. We fell onto the bed in stitches. We had another drink. Then Jerry sent for sandwiches. When I told him I'd been molested as a little girl, Jerry told me it was the most horrible thing he'd ever heard. He held me in his arms while I cried and he cried with me. I just loved him then, and I do to this day. Jerry was almost bashful when it came to having sex, but he thoroughly enjoyed it. He didn't go all the way, though, to preserve his loyalty to his wife. As we returned to the Sands on Las Vegas Boulevard, we quietly enjoyed the sunrise over Sunrise Mountain. Jerry Lewis was one of the nicest men I have ever met”. —"Rat Pack Party Girl" (2017) by Jane McCormick”

Here is a link of her talking in person. She mentions Frank Sinatra and Jerry in this part and in part 2 she talks about Dean Martin. It’s here that she says she would’ve loved to marry Jerry out of all the men that she had slept with, and apparently she’s slept with a couple of thousand in her estimation.

She mentions Jerry starting at 10:07 in part 1

Part 1: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PSbPQ4482gE

Part 2: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QDmVyR7Flqg

[little-lizziej]

"Will you talk to him?" Alya asks Marinette as she takes a seat on her chase, the soft cushions support Marinette's back as she talks with Alya.

"No" the bluenette shakes her head. "I broke them up, I'm the reason his heart got broken." Marinette lets out a sigh before lifting her legs and hugging them. "How am I supposed to even look at him?" She asks.

Alya looks at her best friend with pity, she had earlier said that out of everyone Adrien deserved love the most, but she had been wrong. She deserves it the most. Marinette deserves it the most. "It's not your fault Marinette" Alya shakes her head.

"Yes it is" She whispers, cutting her best friend off.

"No!" Alya exclaims and stands up from the chaise frustratedly. "It's Kagami's fault, yes you liked him! You loved him! But you also respected him...and her!" She yelled as she started pacing around the room. She just couldn't believe it, Kagami managed to make her best friend believe this was her fault when it wasn't.

"A relationship isn't made out of three people Marinette, and she shouldn't have talked to you about it, she should've talked to her boyfriend about it. You don't owe anything to her, he does. Because he is in the relationship"

"I was still a bad friend! Maybe I'm not in the relationship but I am her friend...and friends don't do that. I had to respect her and her boundaries because of our friendship and that's final"

"A friend?" Alya asks with a scoff. "You think what she did was friend-approved?"

Marinette stays silent, she knows Kagami was indeed a bad friend. Friends don't make them ignore their feelings or friends, they don't hurt each other. They encourage and respect each other's feelings.

Marinette shrugs her shoulders as she lets out a tired sigh. "She was a bad friend" She whispers with a nod, "but she liked him...and I know better than anyone that love makes you do crazy things"

"You also know how to love" Alya narrows her eyes at the wall as she sits beside Marinette. "You know how to love your friends"

"I think she's just confused"

"I don't care" Alya grits out, "you hate being selfish so I'll be selfish for you. You were here first, you liked him first. You loved him first"

"I don't even know what love is" Marinette cuts her best friend off. "Maybe I wasn't in love with him...maybe I just loved him as a friend"

...

"Kagami stop" Adrien clenches his jaw as he watches his ex girlfriend approach him once again. He takes several steps back and tires to maintain the distance between them.

"Adrien please!" She whines, "I-I made a mistake!"

"No Kagami!" He yells without a care about who listens. "You hurt her"

"So what if I did? She's just Marinette!"

"Just Marinette? She's the nicest and most caring girl I've ever met. She has done absolutely nothing to you!"

"She loves you!" Kagami yells and instantly regrets it. He didn't know that. Adrien didn't know that.

"No she doesn't!" The young model shakes his head in denial.

"Stop being so oblivious Adrien! Why do you think she made you that scarf on your birthday? Or why she has so many pictures of you on her wall? Or why she stutters and gets super nervous when you're around? She's in love with you!"

"She made that scarf?" He asks her unable to think about anything else.

"That's not important!" Kagami rolls her eyes and hears him approaching.

"Yes it is!" Adrien yells as he grabs her softly by the shoulders. "Kagami we are not getting back together"

"Fine" Kagami whispers after a few seconds, she opens the door of his room and looks back at him. "It's your loss anyways" she grins before slamming the door closed.

Adrien lets out a sigh as he sits down on his bed with his hands pulling at his hair. "Grr I swear if you had just let me at her!" Plagg exclaims as he comes out of his hiding spot. "I hate that girl!"

"Why do you hate her?" Adrien asks.

"She hurt Marinette, no one touches my princess" the black kwami growls. "She makes the best cheese puffs!" He adds before letting out a dreamy sigh.

Adrien stays silent, he can't help but think about Kagami's words. She's in love with you. She's in love with me. Those two sentences keep repeating over and over in his head. Plagg glances at his holder and tilts his head to the side in wonder. "What are you thinking about kid?" He asks him.

"Do you think Marinette is in love with me?" He lifts his head and watches Plagg.

Plagg's eyes widen as he takes another bite put of his Camembert cheese. He swallows before taking a deep breath, "well..."

"What?" The young model asks him with a frown.

"I need more cheese" Plagg groans. Suddenly, a shoe flies his way. Plagg dodges the shoe and places his hand on his chest. "Well someone has issues" he mumbles under his breath before letting out a laugh. "Oh I'm so funny!"

"Plagg!" Adrien exclaims.

"Ok ok!" Plagg yells as he throws his hands in the air. "I think she is in love with you...can I have more cheese now?"

"Ugh" Adrien groans, "this just complicates everything"

"I thought you already knew?"

"I knew she liked me! Not loved me!"

"Potato, poTaTo it's the same thing" Plagg rolls his eyes and shrugs. He just couldn't believe his holder was complicating things so much. If he was in this position with his Camembert he would just eat it. He wouldn't complicate his life so much.

"It's not! You don't get it Plagg, my father has never said he loved me! The only person that's said it is Kagami. How am I supposed to know how to feel?"

"You love her kid" Plagg sighs as he approaches Adrien and sits on his shoulder. "Just don't hurt her"

...

The classroom is filled with chatter as usual, only this time there is only one topic to talk about. Why did Kagami and Adrien break up?

Maybe it's none of their business, but they can't help but wonder why? And how it affected not only Adrien but a certain bluenette. To say they're worried is an understatement, said bluenette has been there for every single person in the class, even Sabrina and Lila.

It's only natural for the class to feel worried about their friend, she's always supported and helped them in every way possible. She's always been an amazing person to count on, and although they do like Adrien, the place Marinette holds in their hearts is far bigger.

"Hey guys!" Greets Adrien as he walks into the classroom. Everyone immediately quiets down and stares at him.

"Hey dude" smiles Nino and holds out his fist. With a smile, Adrien bumps his fist against Nino's. "How are you feeling dude?" Upon te question everyone listens in, eager to know how their friend has taken the break up.

"Surprisingly ok" Adrien chuckles with a shrug. Everyone lets out a sigh of relief but doesn't stop worrying. There is after all a certain designer who is yet to confirm her feelings.

"Adrien" Alya greets him with a nod, she isn't sure how to feel, a part of her is happy for him. Maybe the model hadn't realized it himself but...his relationship had started becoming toxic.

Without a doubt many had noticed, but said nothing. Their opinion hadn't been asked and Adrien looked happy. They, however, couldn't stay out of it anymore. Adrien wasn't only getting affected by this, but Marinette was too.

The young designer knew how much her friend deserved, and to see the way his own girlfriend and father treated him killed her.

"Good morning everyone!" Said Ms.Bustier  as she walked through the door. Everyone greeted her back and sat down in their respective seats.

"I'm here!" Marinette yelled as she ran inside the classroom, late true to Marinette's fashion. "I'm sorry madam!" The bluenette ducked her head as she apologized and made her way to her seat.

Because her head was firmly on the floor, Marinette didn't catch Adrien looking at her dreamily.

"It's alright Marinette just don't let it happen again" Ms.Bustier sighs knowing very well it will happen again.

"Can I talk to you after class Marinette?" Asks Adrien after he turns to look at the bluenette. Marinette's eyes widen before she quickly nods and shifts her gaze away from him. "Great" Adrien says with a grin.

Eventually the class ends and the classroom empties, "where uh...do you want to talk?" Marinette asks Adrien refusing to meet his eyes. Although it cant be further form the truth, Marinette couldn't help but firmly believe that in just a few seconds she'd be blamed for her friend's broken heart.

"I'm sorry Kagami made you feel that way Marinette" Adrien apologizes and reaches for the blunette's hand. He laces his fingers with hers as he lightly tugs on her hand pulling her closer. "I never ever want to loose you" he whispers.

"It's all my fault" Marinette mutters looking away from him, "you shouldn't be apologizing"

"It was never your fault" Adrien denies as he shakes his head. "Kagami shouldn't have done that, she shouldn't have gotten in between our friendship"

"Did you get hurt?" Marinette whispers making the model chuckle and shake his head once again.

"You ignoring me hurt a lot more than Kagami leaving me" he smiles as he grabs Marinette by the waist.

"Really?" Marinette asks finally looking at him.

"Yeah" Adrien whispers, "did you make that scarf for me on my birthday?"

Marinette's eyes widen as she recalls the blue scarf. "H-how did you-"

"So you did" Adrien interrupts her. "Why didn't you tell me?" He asks.

Marinette shrugs and squeezes his hand, smiling when the action is returned. "You looked so happy and I...I didn't want to take that away from you"

Adrien looks at Marinette with wide eyes, no one had ever cared about him so much. A warm feeling takes over him as butterflies appear on his stomach making him feel all kinds of ways.

"Do you love me Marinette?" Adrien asks feeling hopeful.

"I-I used to, but I shoved those feelings away when Kagami and you started dating"

"So not anymore?"

"No" Marinette shakes her head, "not anymore"

Adrien's stomach sinks at her words. It's such a shame he finally realized he loved her just as she stopped loving him.

Previous chapter

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[maruzzewrites]

(Every breathe you) Take #1

Hello! This is what was supposed to be the April’s Fool fic but I didn’t write it in time. It’s an Actor AU in the “universe” of EBYT. All nice and cool. Not real content warnings.

You looked down at your car’s clock. It was barely late afternoon, maybe he was in class. You let the phone fall onto the passenger’s seat, and continued to drive.

“Cut!”

The director shouts. Your shoulders go lax and the tension melts over your back, making you slump over the fake car seat. You stretch as everyone around starts to walk around, taking props and placing them outside the set. You climb out and look around to see your fellow actors, all gathered somewhere just outside the current scene.

You try to catch up with them, but you are stopped halfway. You almost trip over some cables on the ground when your manager calls you. She rushes to grab your arm, and you can see the burning desire to reprimand how clumsy you can be. She decides against it, yanking you straight and clearing her throat.

“You remember you got an interview today, right?” Her question is simple and, luckily, you do remember. Having an acting role is a new thing to you, especially with the role of the protagonist, and you did mess up a bit at the start. You are so used to minor roles or filling other positions around the set that you needed a bit to pick up the pace.

“Of course,” you answer. You see she is about to speak again, you even know about what: you need to plan what to say and what to omit during this interview. But you really don’t want to think about it, not with the filming being finished for the day. You will catch up later, “I will see you later. I need to do something…”

Before she can protest, you march away towards your colleagues. They’re now outside the building to allow some of them a quick smoke break, and they welcome you in their little circle without any problem. You look at each of them, and you find it hilarious how similar they are to their own characters – without the threatening auras, of course.

“So,” you cross your arms, “do you guys know what to say in this interview?”

 “Excuse me,” One of the reporters raises his hand, a pen between his fingers. You look up at him and ask him to ask whatever he wants. He grins, “Thank you. So, can you tell us anything more about the idea behind this show?”

“Well,” you start and look around the other actors to see if someone wants to speak instead. No one even attempts, so it’s in your hands, “I was said it was supposed to be about normalcy and what it means in a dangerous place. The director has experience with people who are called not so legally to clean at strangers’ houses and wanted to show it more.”

The reporter thanks you for the answer, even seems to want to ask one more, but someone else jump on the occasion to inquiry, “Did you choose it because of the premise? It seemed like a difficult role for a new actor.”

You think about it a bit, “I liked the premise. It’s dark and I don’t know if I can fake falling in love more than being scared. These goons make it rather easy, too.”

You point at them with your thumbs; some of them chuckle, some of them roll their eyes, some seem more embarrassed than anything. You hope you haven’t offended them too bad – it’s not your fault they really look rather menacing at times.

“Means we are good actors,” Formaggio chimes in, grinning like a fox. He turns to you and points a finger, “You too. Sometimes I really think we are intimidating you. The first time you saw Risotto, you looked like you saw a ghost.”

Some of the people in the room giggle at that, while Risotto pouts a little at the observation. The poor man can’t help his appearance or his size, and you came to understand he is one of the calmest and nicest people in that group. To avenge him of this direct insult, you decide to tease Formaggio a bit, “Look who’s talking. You’re the one who looks like he belongs in an actual gang, here.”

The joke makes even the imperturbable Prosciutto crack a smile, along with the sneer from Illuso at Formaggio’s frown. You even see the next reporter barely contain a laugh when she raises her had to speak, “You seem to get along quite well. Do you find it interesting to work with your colleagues on this project?”

The question is general, but you figure you talked enough for all of them. When a second too much of silence lingers, Melone is happy to jump in, “I enjoy it quite a bit! I barely get the opportunity to work with people who are so funny.”

“Really?” Ghiaccio almost yells, before he can reign in his tone. His inside voice is still loud, but it borders a stage whisper, “Because you’re really annoying during breaks. You say the most inane things and we’re supposed to just take it.”

Melone smiles, affable, “As I said, funny. You’re all entertaining. I get why you would become actors!”

Someone in the public clears his throat and then stands up to speak. Doesn’t really wait for his turn, but no one seems to mind besides turning around in their seats to look at him. He asks, “How did you come to accept your parts? You seem like a very varied bunch.”

The others look at each other, then Prosciutto takes the stage, “Formaggio tried for the role before us, then told us about the auditions. I assume we were just the right fit for the characters.”

The reporter nods and then looks at you with expectation. You don’t have quite the same story to them, “I… I just wanted to try for a big role, for once. I was told I had the face for the story, even if now I knows it means being somewhat average.”

A bit of an awkward silence before someone – Melone, specifically – intervenes, “I don’t think you are average or plain. You just give a friendly vibe.”

You smile at him just when Illuso decides to speak up, “That’s a nice way to say homely.”

He gains a light punch in the arm since he is sitting right next to you, which makes him chuckle and pretend to fall over on his chair. Ghiaccio, sitting at his other side, shoves him almost violently when they are close to touching. Risotto tells them to calm down.

“Do you have anything to tell us about the future of the show?” A reporter takes advantage of the ruckus to ask before anyone else can. He looks at every actor for a handful of seconds each before elaborating, “Fans really want to know what’s coming up in the near future.”

You ponder on answering that one question. You don’t let anyone chime in before you take your decision, explaining, “I don’t think we can reveal too much, but what’s coming is probably obvious. You know about stories with gangs. There may be something surprising to it, maybe.”

The reporter nods and waits patiently. You just shoot him a kind smile and you can almost see the disappointment coloring his face. You were told not to speak too much about the future plot, direct orders from the director and your manager – who was very eager to let you know how much you needed to shut your mouth.

The reporter evidently knows when to drop it because he doesn’t prob further. The rest of the interview goes smoothly, with jokes and teasing, with answered questions. People are really curious about the show despite being so grim, but you appreciate the fans.

At the end of the whole thing, you wonder what you will read the following days in online articles from those reporters.

 “Have you seen the new theories? People are really quick to take every ounce of info they can get from exclusives.” Melone scrolls his phone right before leaving it inside the pockets of his jacket, ready to put on his outfit.

You hum in response, too busy rereading the script for the episode. You hope you will finish quickly so that you go somewhere and eat with your colleagues – it’s been a while since your last lunch together. It may or not be because you end up giggling during the most tense scenes, during the first few takes.

Melone leaves you alone, wishing you good luck for the first scene of the day. You take a deep breath and replay it in your mind, trying to visualize it.

Going back home after a stressful day. After having to play a game of cat and mouse with dangerous men, wanting nothing more than a doll in their hands. You feel the tension harden your muscles, your shoulders and back stiff with anxiety.

You are a cleaner dealing with something too big for you, and you return to that house.

[mookybear12404]

I know a lot of people, including me, felt a bit let down with the reunion between Byleth and Claude.

But now? Now I realize that this masterpiece of a scene is an incredibly vital piece to Claude’s character development.

Let me explain to you why.

Firstly I’ll have to explain Claude’s character development. I’ve seen a post or two where people accuse Claude of being the only lord without any character development. Well it is true that his character development isn’t as in-your-face as some of the other lords, (like Dimitri), Claude does in fact have quite the character development.  

To start off, we know that Claude didn’t exactly have the nicest childhood. Listen here to his support conversation with Marianne:

Claude: There’s no reason to feel uncomfortable. It’s not like I plan on saying it aloud. But if my guess is correct, there’s something I want to tell you. Will you hear me out?

Marianne: Fine. I will listen.

Claude: Once upon a time, in a faraway place…

Marianne: What the— are you telling me a story?

Claude: Just listen. Once upon a time, in a faraway place, there was a young boy. This boy came from a despised lineage. In short, his mother was a daughter of the enemy. So the young boy was treated horribly by everyone around him. He hadn’t done anything wrong. Everyone hated him simply for existing. Yelling, fighting back, explaining himself… Nothing he did could change his situation. When he was finally old enough, he ran far away from home. He escaped.

Marianne: It sounds to me like he had no choice. I would have done the same, had it been me…

Claude: Thing is, after he ran away, he still found himself in the very same position. People in the outside world hated him for where he came from.

Claude spent most of his early childhood having to defend himself from repeated and violent attacks of racism. He was harassed so much that he felt he had no choice but to run away at the first opportunity.  

We get even more about this in his support with Byleth:

Claude: Well, I grew up in an environment where it was necessary to think that way. It’s like I told you before, I wasn’t born into a life of luxury. Ever since I was a child, I’ve always been seen as…different from those around me. An outsider of sorts. I’ve been resented and hated. There have even been attempts on my life. I don’t believe I’ve earned such treatment, but that’s how it goes for people like me.

Byleth: I don’t think of you as an outsider.

Claude: Thanks, Teach. You know, in many ways I’m just a normal person like everyone else. But in the right environment, anyone could be seen as an outsider. It can become…overwhelming. That’s why I kept running. Kept fighting. As a kid I spent a lot of time licking my wounds and coming up with schemes, trying to keep my nose out of trouble while plotting against my enemies. My parents always told me I wouldn’t grow stronger if I didn’t learn to fight my own battles. And so, in the end, I did. And I grew up to be as independent and self-reliant as my parents always wished for me to be. Lucky me, right?

Having to defend oneself alone at such a young age, having to cope with isolation, constant mistreatment, and discrimination, those are all things that must of had an impact on his mental well-being.

We know that Three Houses is a game that doesn’t take traumatic experiences lightly. Dimitri, having to witness the Tragedy of Duscar, suffers from terrible survivors guilt, depression, and anger. Edelgard is permanently scarred by the torturous experiments inflicted on her at a young age. Even many of the minor characters, such as Bernadetta and Marianne, suffer tremendous detriments to their mental health because of their childhood traumas.  

Despite this, Claude appears to be one of the most cheerful and laid-back characters in the game.

At first.

While Claude comes off as an easy-going guy, we quickly learn otherwise.

Near the beginning of the game Byleth states to Sothis that Claude, “has a smile that doesn’t quite reach his eyes”.

Claude is a character that lives in a mask. He’s secretive. Defensive. He refuses to share his his secrets with others, and he straight up lies to Byleth about his birthright in their C support. In fact, he somehow manages to keep his identity as an Almyran a secret right up until the very end of the game.

He had to learn from a young age to defend himself. Without significant physical strength, he had to resort to fighting dirty, and eventually learned to use his brain to his advantage. According to the wiki:  

“Being treated as an outsider by both sides, he devised schemes at an early age that would help him survive the rough treatment he received from both houses. These experiences helped him develop his strong tactical prowess.”

On top of being secretive and cunning, Claude is also someone who HATES when others have secrets. He pretty much spends the academy trying to gather church secrets and pressing other characters into divulging their backstories.

In an earlier conversation with Marianne:

Claude: She’s hiding something, that much is clear. But that just makes me all the more desperate to know her secrets!

I can’t find the exact words he says, but in a conversation with Byleth where Claude tries to convince them to give him Jeralt’s diary, he admits that if Byleth had turned him down he would have stolen the diary anyways, because he was so desperate to know their secrets.

From all of these traits, It is clear to see that there is a lot more to his character than just his cheerful demeanor. It is also clear that the events of his childhood had one major effect on Claude.

They shattered his trust

Claude is someone who has learned that there is nobody in the world he can trust but himself. He becomes totally self sufficient, runs away from home, conceals his identity, and enters the academy completely alone.

Claude is also the only lord in the game to not have a “best friend” character that is locked from being recruited to another house. If you wanted, you could take all the students away from him, leaving him completely alone.

Throughout your adventures with him, however, this shell of distrust seems to crack little by little.

During many of his final support conversations, (such as the Marianne one I copied earlier, as well as his one with Lorenz, Hilda, and many others,) Claude is more open and honest about himself. While he never fully trusts any of the other students with his identity or his plans to unity Almyra with Fodlan, he is less careful to hide things that relate to his homeland.  

It is with Byleth, however, that Claude opens up to the most.

Byleth is the only person Claude comes to trust enough to share his grand plan. (side note, I truly loved the English voice acting in their A support scene. I haven’t heard the Japanese yet but I bet it’s just as good.) During their A support, there isn’t the usual swagger or charm in his voice. He’s open, honest, and so so raw. He starts by admitting to Byleth that he’s an outsider, (though he doesn’t say from where,) and he, for the first time in his life, describes his dream in detail to another person.

He shares his plan with such a careful voice. And at the end of his speech Claude asks if Byleth thinks his plan is just “a crazy pipe dream”. He’s so desperate for Byleth’s approval.

Also, there’s also a really good piece of dialogue I enjoy from Claude in the war phase. If you try to move him while he’s at critically low he will grunt,

“I-I’m hurt, but I’m with you.”

He trusts Byleth so much, that even when he’s close to death, he chooses to go along with whatever plan they have for him.

Claude, the master tactician, king of distrust, obediently follows Byleth’s orders.

So going back to the reunion scene…

While yes, some tears and a hug would have been nice and all, it wouldn’t have been able to convey the most vital part of Claude’s character development. Claude has grown to trust Byleth more than any other person in the world. So much so, that he refuses to believe that anything, not even death, could have stopped Byleth from breaking their promise to return on that day.

And he’s not like Edelgard, who returned to the monastery on a slight sliver of hope. No, Claude believed without a shadow of a doubt that Byleth would return that day. He believed this so firmly that he even prepared food for them.

It seems like a stretch of logic for Claude to think like this. I mean, Byleth disappeared in the middle of a massive battle. Who’s to say their body wasn’t buried under some rubble or something? But Claude’s not someone who likes to bound himself to logic. And this is his Teach we’re talking about here. His Teach, who tore open the eternal darkness to return to him. His Teach, who risked life and limb daily on the battle field to protect him. Teach must have survived. And if they survived then they’re coming back.

Its not a question of “if” or “when”, but of “so what kind of food should I bring for them?”

[quicksilversquared]

Helpfulness with a Side of Spite

Superheroes are kind. Superheroes are patient. Superheroes are helpful.

....that doesn’t mean that superheroes can’t manipulate the situation, though. And they’ll do it with a smile on their face.

links in the reblog

Superheroes were, practically by definition, meant to be helpful.

Ladybug and Chat Noir helped all of Paris by fighting supervillains and restoring the city. They helped save lives and property alike if they happened to be nearby when a bus or news helicopter went out of control. They saved cats that were stuck up in trees and helped parents with young kids evacuate when there were akuma attacks nearby. They even helped out spoiled brats and snotty liars who were getting targeted, even if they definitely didn't deserve the help.

It was one of the reasons why they were so liked, really. Paris' superheroes weren't aloof or cold or focused only on their job and their job alone. They went out of their way to reach out and make sure that people were okay.

….but even the most patient of superheroes had their limits. There were only so many times that Ladybug could put up with Chloe's clinging and endless babble when, despite Chloe's assurances, she had definitely done something to tick the unfortunate akumatized person off and therefore entirely deserved to be the target of their ire. And really, trying to help Lila at all during akuma attacks was a waste of effort, since she seemed determined to fake injuries and try to distract them. But it was still expected that they at least try to help, because- well, they were superheroes.

Still, being a superhero didn't necessarily mean having superhuman patience. And even though it was still early in the morning- they hadn't even finished homeroom yet- Lila was already wearing Marinette's patience thin.

Really, it was an impressive accomplishment, considering that Lila was "out of town" on one of her mother's "trips" and therefore not even physically in the classroom. But she had video-called in first thing after homeroom started to give an overly saccharine-sweet "recounting" of what she had been up to the previous few days. This time she was calling from "the fjords of Finland, I wish you guys could be here because it is gorgeous!" and prattling on about some princess that she had supposedly met and was discussing charity work with.

Marinette could not envision anything being a bigger waste of time. They could be catching up on curriculum that had gotten behind because of akuma attacks, but nope, no such luck. Instead, they were listening to Lila's completely made-up and not at all relevant stories and wasting their entire homeroom period. Lila had been yammering on for over forty-five minutes now, and showed no sign of stopping.

(Also, Marinette had some serious questions about how Lila was supposedly getting enough internet to support the call while on a hill overlooking one of the most spectacular of the Finnish fjords, which was decidedly not close to any sort of civilization.)

At least Marinette had started bringing projects to school to work on during their calls with Lila. If they couldn't use their time productively for schoolwork during homeroom, then she would take the chance to get some of her other work done. Maybe Ms. Bustier frowned on it, but. Well. Marinette had more or less ceased to care. She had too much to get done to be too concerned with what did or didn't bother her teacher, particularly when what she was doing wasn't hurting anyone.

"So I'll be out for the rest of this week and maybe a couple days next week," Lila chirped at long last, beaming at them. "Depending on whether I can persuade Princess Sophia to join Prince Ali and I on our global campaign to end pollution! I'll keep you all updated!"

The entire class exploded with assurances, everyone hastening to tell Lila that they were sure that she would be able to get the princess to help, and how amazing it was that she was doing such great work, and how everybody was sure to pitch in and help her get caught back up on her schoolwork once she returned to Paris. Lila basked in the attention, gushing about how kind everyone was and how lucky she was to get placed in what had to be the world's nicest class.

Which of course meant a whole new round of people telling Lila that she was nice and kind and fantastic, too.

Barf.

Finally, finally, Lila signed off after another few rounds of back-and-forth gushing. Marinette let out a sigh of relief, plenty glad that she wouldn't have to listen to Lila's humble-bragging for another couple days. The far-fetched stories that Lila had been spinning- seriously, how were people believing that Lila had somehow saved a beloved prized cow herd with only the help of their traditional decorative cowbells- had been grating on her nerves.

Cows with decorate cowbells wasn't even a Finnish thing. Somehow, Lila (and everyone else in the class, with the sole exception of Adrien) had forgotten that that was a Swiss tradition.

It was probably too much to expect that Lila would actually pay any attention to details like that. For her, differences between countries and cultures were probably annoying little details that she didn't feel like bothering with.

"Well, we won't be doing anything as exciting as discussing anti-pollution plans with a princess today, but we do have plenty of other things to cover," Ms. Bustier announced as soon as the call ended, glancing up at the clock. "We're actually running a little behind schedule in Literature, so let's use the last, ah, three minutes of homeroom to try to get a bit of a head start so we won't have to have as much make-up homework this weekend!"

Marinette could only sigh and hope that the rest of the day wouldn't be so incredibly exasperating.

Because right now? She didn't feel like being very helpful at all.

  By the time news of an akuma out and about reached the school in the early afternoon, Marinette was almost relieved at the excuse to leave for a bit. It seemed like everywhere she turned, people were talking about Lila's latest so-called adventures- so much for not having to put up with it for at least a couple more days- and speculating about what new royal support might mean for Lila's campaign. And as if that wasn't bad enough, Ms. Bustier had pulled Marinette to the side between classes to tell her off for her obvious disinterest during Lila's video call, so Marinette's mood had slid even further downhill.

And now? Well, she was in the mood to work out some of her frustrations on Hawkmoth's latest minion.

But not too obviously, of course. People would wonder if they saw her punch an akuma's face in, just because she was pretending that it was Lila's. Besides, whoever was under the akumatization was a victim, as she and Chat Noir were always reminding the press and the people that akumas had targeted. They weren't in control of what they were doing.

(Well. Mostly. There had been some exceptions, largely consisting of Lila, but proving that enough to be able to persuade anyone in power was a bit difficult. On top of that, once the first accusation of on-purpose collusion with Hawkmoth stuck, then- well, it could easily turn into a slippery slope lined with baseless accusations from people out looking for revenge.)

Though to be fair, it honestly seemed as though this particular akuma completely deserved whatever beating Ladybug gave her. Best-Laid Plans seemed entirely entitled, screaming in fury whenever her "foolproof" plots to capture Ladybug and Chat Noir were defeated and yelling about how dare they not fall fire her traps, how dare they not believe whatever she said, how dare they laugh at how (laughably) easy and transparent her so-called complex plans to catch them were.

Honestly, she and Lila would probably get along fantastically. Both of them had some serious delusions of grandeur.

"I can't figure out how she thinks these things are foolproof and complex when she can't spend more than a couple minutes seeing them up," Chat Noir said as he yanked the side off of another "hidden" cage and chucked it off to the side so that it wouldn't pose them any danger. "They're impulsive and showy but lack any real substance."

Best-Laid Plans let out another screech of fury. "Stop making fun of them, they're foolproof!"

"Right, because even fools would be safe from them!" Ladybug yelled back. "Because they fool no one!"

"How dare you, I learned how to make traps from an expert in Bolivia! You're just getting lucky!"

"She does realize that claiming that doesn't somehow make it true, right?" Ladybug sighed, utterly exasperated. They had wasted half an hour already, and she really wasn't in the mood for another half hour of this nonsense. "Lucky Charm!"

A bottle of soap dropped into her hand. Ladybug sighed, then glanced around as she and Chat Noir sprinted after Best-Laid Plans. She was heading up, up, up the Eiffel Tower, fast but not fast enough to outrun the superheroes.

"There's another trap there," Chat Noir pointed out as they leapt up another level. "I bet she's planning on pushing us in."

An idea clicked in Ladybug's mind. Of course! "She's going to stop on the next platform- hit the soap bottle right at her as we pass, hard enough for it to split! And- now!"

It was practically a work of art, really. Ladybug tossed her Lucky Charm at Chat Noir, who hit it at just the right time. Sudsy pink soap sprayed across the platform, completely coating it. The split bottle and what little soap remained in it slammed into Best-Laid Plans' face, sending her staggering right into the slippery puddle of soap.

And she slid, cursing up a storm, right off the edge of the platform and neatly into the trap she had set up below.

"Well, would you look at that," Chat Noir said cheerfully as he and Ladybug swung down to land next to the soap-covered Best-Laid Plans. "Your traps can catch one person, at least! So they're not entirely fool-proofed after all."

Ladybug nearly choked on her laughter as she snagged Best-Laid Plans' cell phone, snapping it in half and catching the butterfly that fluttered free. The akuma only glared, furious but unable to do anything with the ropes of her trap twisted around her arms and keeping them bound.

Really, it was art.

After a moment's pause to appreciate the sight a little more, Ladybug snagged the remnants of the soap bottle with her yo-yo and tossed them into the air. "Miraculous Ladybug!"

The glittering swarm rushed around the city, wiping away all of the destroyed traps and putting things back to normal. Once everything else was fixed, the light swept around Best-Laid Plans and left a sulking Lila Rossi in her place.

Somehow, Ladybug was not entirely surprised.

"Surprise," Chat Noir sighed, rolling his eyes as he stepped up to her side. "Gee, and wasn't she meant to be out of the country right now?"

Deep in Ladybug's brain, there was a distinct aha as an idea was born, and Ladybug pounced on it. Pasting on her best friendly-helpful-neighborhood-superhero look, she approached Lila, who only looked more sour.

"You must have been really upset about whatever plans didn't quite work out!" Ladybug told her, trying her best to sound sympathetic instead of smug. "It's always disappointing when things don't work out the way we want them to, but it's rarely the end of the world!"

Chat Noir nodded seriously, only the twitching corners of his lips giving away the fact that he was maybe not quite as sincere as he was pretending to be. "Exactly! If we miss a movie, there's always another viewing. If we can't go out with friends, there's always another day. It's not worth getting too upset about, because then we miss out on other stuff. I'd say just let it go and move on with the rest of your day."

Lila looked mutinous. Ladybug had to assume that whatever plans had been foiled hadn't exactly been the sort that could just be picked up and done another day. "Uh-huh."

"Chat Noir is right," Ladybug said immediately in her perkiest voice, cheerfully ignoring Lila's deepening scowl. "It's best not to linger too much over plans that didn't work out and just go back to your normal day instead. In fact, to help you get back to your normal day, I'll even give you a free ride back to school, so you don't miss even more class! You're at Collège Françoise Dupont, right?"

Without waiting for an answer, Ladybug grabbed Lila and hoisted her over her shoulder before the other girl could realize what was going on and object. She and Chat Noir were usually more careful when carrying civilians- after all, the over the shoulder carry wasn't very comfortable- but she definitely wasn't keeping Lila in any position where she could make a grab for her earrings. "See you, Chat Noir!"

Chat Noir waved back, looking suspiciously like he was struggling to not double over laughing. "See you, Ladybug!"

With that, Ladybug was off, jumping off of the Eiffel Tower and letting herself do a free-fall for perhaps a little longer than she normally would before casting out her yo-yo and swinging at top speed towards the school.

She really couldn't tell if Lila's screaming was in fear or in anger.

It took almost no time at all for the school to draw near, and Ladybug did some hasty calculations to figure out where to go- her class should still be in Literature, though they would be switching pretty soon- before aiming right at the window Ms. Bustier had opened earlier in the day and dropping neatly in.

"Ta-da, back in class!" Ladybug announced cheerfully, dumping Lila back on her feet with perhaps a little more force than necessary. Lila staggered and nearly fell before catching herself. "And it looks like they managed to start up class again after you got akumatized! That's good, I know that sometimes after people get akumatized in school, the whole day just gets entirely disrupted. And I'm sure you wouldn't want to be the cause of your class falling behind on their work!" She sent the class a smile, then jumped straight back out the window with a wave. As soon as she did, the class exploded with noise, confusion clearly reigning supreme.

Ladybug only smiled.

  By the time Marinette slipped back into the classroom, there was such mayhem going on that no one noticed her come in. Lila had clearly tried to spin a new story to cover why Ladybug had brought her to class- and how she had gotten akumatized when she was meant to be several countries away- but this time, no one was buying it.

In fact, Marinette noticed as she slipped back to her seat, Mr. Damocles had already been called in and was currently punching a number into his phone. No doubt Lila's mom was being called now that there was solid evidence that that Lila had not been where she was supposed to be. It was definitely long overdue, honestly, but better late than not at all.

Adrien slid into his seat a minute later with a politely puzzled look on his face, apparently having missed the commotion with a poorly-timed bathroom visit. He caught sight of Marinette, pretty much the only other student still sitting in her spot, and raised a curious eyebrow.

"Lila got akumatized and Ladybug was being helpful and brought her back to class," Marinette whispered, unable to hide her grin. "And, well…"

"Now she's in trouble because clearly she wasn't in Finland," Adrien finished. He grinned back. "Somehow I suspect that Ladybug might have known that Lila hadn't been in class in the first place."

Marinette bit back a tart I don't know what you're talking about before she could give herself away. She wasn't sure why Adrien would suspect that Ladybug would know about Lila's lie about not being in the country, but- well, maybe it was because he had seen Ladybug call Lila out before, and it wasn't exactly normal for her and Chat Noir to return civilians to wherever they had been at the start of the fight.. They only did it for young kids, really, and only if they had enough time left before they detransformed.

So maybe she hadn't been very subtle, so sue her. But at least now Lila wouldn't be able to carry out whatever no doubt nefarious plan that she had been dreaming up. It had already then thwarted once, and Ladybug hadn't been about to let Lila take another swing at it, despite what she and Chat Noir had said about trying again.

"Hopefully she won't get akumatized again," Adrien added after a minute. Up in the front, Lila was in full meltdown mode, but no one seemed particularly inclined to comfort her. Mr. Damocles had clearly gotten through to Lila's mom and had retreated to the corner to try to hold a conversation uninterrupted by the commotion. "I mean, Ladybug and Chat Noir have already fought her today, I'm sure they don't want to again." He grimaced. "I'd hope that Hawkmoth would be tired of her by now, but considering how many times Mr. Pigeon has showed up, that….might be too much to hope for."

Marinette made a face at that. True, another Lila akumatization would be less than ideal, but on the bright side, if she got akumatized at school, then hopefully classes would be canceled for the afternoon and no one would notice her missing. Besides, well… "I'm sure they'd rather just deal with her being akumatized again today than being akumatized several dozen more times in the next couple months, because she is totally on track to do that."

"Ooh, good point."

"And honestly, if anyone is going to get akumatized today, I would guess that it would be one of our classmates," Marinette added, glancing around. People were clearly ticked off about the lies Lila had told, with all of the connections that she had promised and the "industry advice" that she had given people getting their hopes up. Now those hopes were dashed, and people had to come to terms with the fact that someone who they thought was a friend- a friend that they had gone out of their way to help more than a few times- had been outright lying to them to manipulate them. That had to stink, and she was sure that some people would be particularly upset. "Oh, poor Rose. She looks like she's about to cry."

"And Alya looks like she's about to commit a murder," Adrien added. There was an edge of laughter to his voice. "But she's still filming, at least."

Marinette looked and had to try not to laugh herself. It seemed like Alya was torn between chewing Lila out and getting her scoop, so she had combined the two in what could only be described as an accusatory interview given in a yell with less-than-flattering angles.

Well. Whatever made her feel better, she supposed.

"All right class, that's enough!" Ms. Bustier finally yelled over the noise. Mr. Damocles had clearly given up on making his phone call in the room and had fled. "Everyone, to your seats, we're going to continue class as normal until further notice- yes, that includes you too, Lila. Just borrow some paper and a pencil, since you didn't come prepared. And now, back to the lesson-"

Marinette exchanged a grin with Adrien as slowly, everyone filtered back to their seats. Most people were clearly in a state of shock still, but others were whispering, comparing stories and trying to figure out where they had missed the signs where things didn't quite line up. The gossip and speculation continued even as Ms. Bustier resolutely tried to forge on with her lesson, questions about what had happened reigning supreme.

The rest of the story came out less than an hour later, during an easily-overheard shouting match between Lila and her mom inside of Mr. Damocles' office.

As it turned out, Lila hadn't intended to get akumatized at all this time around. She had gotten so upset partway through the day because she had gotten an email- an email that should have been sent to her mom, but apparently the email on file was Lila's instead- that said that, given her test scores and the absolute piles of unreturned makeup work from during her trips, the school would not be able to approve any further travels for the rest of the school year and- even worse- she was in serious danger of having to repeat the grade. She had been furious- there was no real way for her to lie her way out of that- and, well, the rest was history.

And Lila was soon to be history, if Alix was to be believed. She had managed to keep hiding nearby after the rest of the class was busted for skipping class and eavesdropping, and had caught more of the fight. Lila's mom was removing her from Paris effective immediately- apparently she had a very strict aunt and uncle back in Italy who would be willing to take her until either Mrs. Rossi could be transferred to a different embassy or Hawkmoth was no longer an issue. In fact, because of Hawkmoth, Lila was going to be sent back to Italy that evening, before she could get akumatized again.

Marinette honestly couldn't be more relieved about that. Lila's akuma forms tended towards the difficult and more indirect than a lot of other akumas, and she got akumatized often. With her gone- and with the class relieved that Lila was getting properly punished for lying to them- the chance of more Lila-related akumas was steadily dropping.

"What I think is funny is that, if Ladybug hadn't done anything, Lila still wouldn't have lasted much longer," Marinette told Tikki as she headed home after school, completely unable to hide the spring in her step. "She wouldn't have been able to go on any more 'trips' and Mr. Damocles would definitely have to reach her mom about the whole being held back thing, so all of the lies would have come out. Ladybug just sped it up." She grinned. "And maybe it was a bit fun to see everyone's reactions." She paused. "...and maybe it was a bit fun to get my revenge, too."

Tikki giggled too, clearly amused. "I bet it was pretty funny to see everyone's faces! And at least now you don't have to worry about Lila anymore. I bet that people will forget about her pretty quickly once she's gone."

"I hope so." Marinette glanced back at the school before she stepped into the bakery. More people than normal were still lingering, no doubt gossiping about everything that had happened and trying to come to terms with the betrayal. Her class was resilient, though, and they would move on. Maybe there would be some lingering disappointment about the hopes and dreams they had pinned on Lila's lies, but it would fade with time.

After all, Lila Rossi wasn't worth their time or energy.

[crowleyellestair]

Headcanons on how the wolves + Jaskier would react to a s/o who is due for their period soon and thus very testy/wheepy? I have just been an atomic bomb this month and it’s driving me and everyone else nuts 😖

AN// I’m sorry it’s rough right now, I feel you 100% I hope you can relate and feel just a touch better through this by laughing or feeling some fluff

 The thing about the boys at Kaer Morhen is that they weren’t really aware of what was happening. Triss had explained it a winter prior due to Ciri’s first cycle, but that hadn’t meant that they were used to it. Sorceresses don’t have these problems, and that was the type of women they were around most of the time. Close friends were always invited to the keep, and when Y/n was invited, it stirred the castle into territory most people wouldn’t think it would go.

Vesemir was the first to notice, being the soft dad he was

-Being as old and as trained as he his, he could simply tell

-He had been quite the gentleman as a young wolf, and was familiar with what to do in general

-Not wanting to truly treat you differently, he still asked for certain chores to be done, keeping you up and walking, but not having to move too much

-Honey and black tea would be specially made for you in the morning, as well as having your seat warm by the time you came down for breakfast

-He made certain your clothes were washed separately and more frequently, wanting to help you feel as clean as possible. The scent of sweat or musk never helps on that front

-Since he also cooks, as well as take care of laundry, he plates your food before taking the large pots to the table. The others thought it was because you became his favorite, and while that was true, he made sure to add extra ginger as that helps with cramps. He had regrets for not growing fennel this season, but he was glad to know that his ginger stock can help make you feel comfortable

Lambert was the first to experience it

-There were pranks to be had between you two

-While Jaskier can take what has been dished, his revenge pranks were never as funny

-He was the one who wasn’t afraid to be rowdy with you, and he found out the hard way that you weren’t up for it

-The witcher had been stalking you through the rafters, waiting until he could pounce

-Cramps weren’t necessarily terrible when approaching time, but you had stopped to rub your lower stomach for a moment, trying to sooth anything before it started

-That was the cat-wannabe’s time to strike

-He slid down the wall behind you, though close enough to whereas he landed, his arms wrapped around your shoulders and he wrapped his legs around your torso in a piggy-back formation

-You immediately went off, turning and falling against the wall

-He evacuated before he would be smashed and as he rounded to the front of you, smirk plastered on his face, you cuffed him as hard as you could

-The tears didn’t come, but the unnecessary adrenaline mixed with the already foul mood

-“Not today, Lambert, I swear to Melitele.”

-His eyes went wide, and he truly felt bad.

-You had never raised your voice, even after that one time he glued your mug of ale to your hand

-He threw out a quick sorry and practically flew down the hall in the direction you had just come from

Geralt had noticed next

-It had been the smell

-Not that you smell, but with the extra mutations, he could sense something

-It had been a familiar thing with Ciri, but he simply couldn’t place it

-He walked in on it as your room was on the way to his

-You had a plant, one Vesemir entrusted you to grow, but unbeknownst to you, it wasn’t really important. He just thought you might like a little life in your room. The plant began to wilt however, and leaves started to fall. You were in mourning, resting and crying against the wall

-The White Wolf stepped in to ask if you were ok, not realizing the situation before, but quickly stepped out when the real water works started. You clutched the plant to your chest and wept

-He made a swift and silent exit, trying to not interfere with your grief nor the scent in the air

Eskel, the soft soul, hadn’t noticed anything

-The brunette had either been held up in the library trying to fit his new finds into the shelves or he was with Lil’ Bleater

-You had made contact with him in the area where the goat roamed, fawning over the dear

-He had simply thought you shared the same kind of bond with the animal as he did

-It actually pleased him thoroughly to see it, a small grin plastered on his face

-You even went as far as picking the lil’ guy up and holding him

-He hadn’t noticed it then, but looking back, you were certainly too into it

Jaskier found out through the three younger witchers asking

-“You’re fully human, so what’s happening?”

-“What do you mean?” The three other men sitting him down in the main hall’s table. Lambert looked hurt and uncomfortable, and in the smallest voice any of them had ever heard from him, he said,

-“She yelled at me.” Geralt nodded, also noting the difference in behavior

-“Her smell is different. Not bad, just off. I also found her with a plant, crying.” His tone was rough and almost angry, upset with himself for not knowing what was going on, nor knowing how to fix it

-“Now thinking about it, she did seem aggressive in her coddling with Lil’ Bleater.” Eskel’s hand flew to his scarred cheek, a habit he developed whenever he thought something was very wrong

-It took the bard a moment to think of ideas, but the realization still came quickly

-He felt confident in his knowledge, though he had certainly been lucky in his life, never really being in contact with the disastrous side of a period

-Being dramatic, but also very out of his depth in this area, he told the men to leave it to him

-He shouldn’t have

-Jaskier ended up on his ass for trying to give you a massage and for making a mess of your bed by putting frozen wildflower petals over it

-Vesemir stepped in finally, overhearing the conversation, and explained that it wasn’t a voluntary thing. That Geralt could sense the intense shift in hormones, and you were lashing out, but not because you wanted to. He, being logical and a great dad, exaggerated how much you didn’t mean it, and how you most likely felt bad. Subtlety was needed for the situation, and no one needed a grand gesture. It was simply another week in the life of someone with ovaries, and you shouldn’t be treated too differently than usual, simply with a little more care.

The boys understood, but still felt bad for whatever reason. Jaskier was the first to think of a discrete apology, realizing a surprise massage was definitely not the way to go about it. He had come up to you late the same night, a hot rock wrapped in the nicest towel he could find, in hand. His same bubbly atmosphere stayed with him as he gently handed it to you. There wasn’t an actual conversation between the two of you, but he explained somewhat,

“I’ve heard that heated pads where better than massages anyways.” He knew that when he received a soft smile that it was okay.

Eskel was the next to think of something you might appreciate. He had a favorite book, despite reading many titles over his time. Embarrassingly enough, it was a smaller romance novella about a noble woman falling in love with a dwarf that worked in her families mine. You didn’t need to know it was his favorite, but he left it in your spot as an offering, knowing how he becomes so wrapped up in the book that he looses a sense of reality while reading it. He simply wanted you to lose yourself or whatever you felt, even just for a moment.

Geralt had become spoiled on his travels with Jaskier and Ciri. He fell in love with chamomile oil and honey exfoliation soap. The scent wasn’t overbearing, and the small grains in it from the oat really made one feel clean. There was a bathing order for everyone, his lining up right before yours. Geralt had extra bars, leaving one for you one night. It was like the others, just with a hint of orange zest. He knew you wouldn’t smell or sense what he could, and again, it wasn’t bad, but he knew how you appreciated feeling clean before this.

Lambert was the last to think of something. This had been traumatic for him, the young witcher taking a liking to you more than he had with someone since Aiden. He never thought he had to apologize for anything, nor has he ever had to come up with something to make someone more comfortable. Of course, he knew he didn’t have to, but he truly cared, and wanted to do something nice. And that came in the form of fur a week after the boys’ realization.

He was always freezing, and always wrapped in fur blankets. He had made sure he had the best furs, scratchy furs being uncomfortable. His favorite was a black and grey wolf pelt he had taken from this overly large wolf he found in the Skellege mountains. No matter where he dragged it, how many times he washed it, or overused it, it continued to be the softest thing he’s felt. Lambert would be spotted frequently at night being wrapped in said fur as he would pad down to use the bathroom. The fur had been cleaned and placed on your bed one night, though when you ventured to his room to ask about it, he was hidden. He was watching of course, and only relaxed when he watched you shrug and wrap the blanket around your shoulders. They all wanted your pain to leave as you mattered to them. They all wanted you safe and secure, but none of you can help it. They all swore they would try their damndest to make you comfortable in caring ways

[marwritesgood]

Match | O. Diaz

Pairing: Oscar x Finnie!Reader

Timeframe: Season 2 - Season 3 (SPOILERS)

Summary: It’s hard what they have had to go through, but they’ve always had each other.

masterlist

A/N: lemme make one thing clear, siblings who have had to assume parental roles in their younger sibling’s life because of incompetent parents are nothing to glamourise or sensationalise. that shit is so hard and so unfair on everyone involved, because it robs so many kids of the luxury of getting to be a kid. no one deserves to have to grow up so fast. i am so touched by how this was represented this season. cheers xox

I couldn’t believe my eyes. Monse was packing a bag and really about to make a decision I could already tell she would live to regret. With Cesar and her broken up, and out last conversation being a tumultuous argument, it seemed she didn’t care about the people she was leaving behind.

“Are you really gonna keep ignoring me, Monse?”

My little sister turns to glare at me, only to turn back around and zip her bag up, before placing the strap over her shoulder. For the past few weeks, she said all but two words to me (”fuck you”), the rest of our communication were made up of me talking and her glaring holes through all the sides of my head.

“Dad?” Monse calls out, as she heads into our kitchen, with me following after her. Our dad was drinking a mug of coffee, when he turned up to see us standing on the opposite side of our kitchen island. “Can we go now? I’m starting to sense a negative presence in the room”

“Oh grow up,” I retorted, folding my arms as once again, Monse spoke of me indirectly, but glared at me in the most direct way possible.

“Actually sweetie,” my dad began, before awkwardly reaching for the car keys in his pocket, and handing them to me as he continued. “I’m gonna let Y/n drive you there.”

Monse may as well have thrown a full-blown tantrum with the way she scoffed aloud, crossed her arms and stormed off to where my dad’s car was parked. I predicted that perhaps Jamal’s dramatic tendencies were beginning to rub off on her.

The first few minutes of the car ride were silent. Monse had opted to listening to music as opposed to listening to me, but when her phone died, I quietly thanked the universe for giving me a chance to make amends with my sister.

“Monse?”

“What?” She answered harshly, turning her head to the view outside her window as opposed to looking at me.

“... I’m sorry, okay?” She shifted her posture so she was sitting taller, and glanced my way for a split second- sure sign that she was willing to listen to me, finally. I wasn’t one to be the first to say sorry, Spooky could tell you all about that. “You have a right to know who our mom is, and I shouldn’t have tried to stop you from finding out.”

Monse nodded, which was enough for me to feel lighter now that things were better between us. The next few minutes were silent against, but it was far more bearable this time around.

“She’s changed you know,” Monse whispers only just loud enough for me to hear. And just like that, my heart dropped. I was so afraid of her getting hurt, but it seemed like she was already setting herself up for that without even realising. “You could stay for dinner... See it for yourself.”

I sighed. I wanted to be honest with Monse. I wanted to tell her the brutal truth about what happened between our parents from the time we were born to the time she left us for good. But seeing how happy Monse was, packing her things and looking to spend time with the one person she’s yearned to know for so long. What kind of a person would I be to ruin that for her?

“Maybe another time, Mon.”

That’s all I needed to say for Monse to drop the topic. The fact that I didn’t respond in an outrage was enough for her, it seemed. Little did she know how hard it was to keep myself from yelling and bawling both at the same time.

Once we got to Julia’s house, I helped Monse with the one suitcase she had packed, while she carried the other backpack she brought with her. We didn’t even need to knock for the door to swing open, and for Julia to embrace Monse in a warm hug. Nice to know she was capable of showing affection to her daughter.

As they pulled apart from one another, I coughed quietly to fill the evidently awkward silence. When I looked up, I saw Julia gazing at me, tears brimming in her eyes. How I wished I had just sprinted to my dad’s car and drove off. I signed up for making amends with Monse, not reuniting with the woman who ruined my life.

“Y/n?” She place her hand over her mouth, and inhaled deeply. I stared at her, emotionless, because I knew getting angry or upset would make things worse between Monse and I. I didn’t need that. “You’ve grown up so beautifully.”

That was far different from how she treated me in the few years she stuck around. I wanted to slap her then and there.

“I’m gonna go say hi to the kids,” Monse said, as she wheeled her suitcase inside, right after taking her shoes off beside their coat rack. 2 seconds in and she was already changing her habits to fit in. I didn’t want to know what she’d be like when I pick her up in a month or so. I secretly hoped she would be begging to come home by then.

With Monse gone, Julia’s expression turned from joyful to regretful. I already had my fair share in life to know white tears when I saw them. For some reason, I stuck around long enough witness them fall again.

“Y/n... I am so sorry,” she wept. She had the audacity to cry in front of me, like she was the one who dealt with the brunt of her actions. I knew then that she hadn’t changed. Not enough for me to ever consider sticking around for dinner, so much as a conversation.

“Monse didn’t specify how long she’ll be staying, but she has my number and unlimited texts.” I wasn’t about to be vulnerable in front of this woman. I wasn’t about to give her the satisfaction of talking out what she did to her daughter. She didn’t deserve that. She never would. “She knows most of the important stuff she needs to know, but if anything comes up, just get her to call or text me.”

Julia nods silently, understanding that just because Monse wanted a relationship with her, didn’t mean she was any less dead to me than she was the last time she abandoned my family. 

I was about to turn around and leave, but there was one thing I needed to get off my chest. Not for my sake. Not for Julia’s. But for Monse’s.

“She’s been looking forward to this for a really long time,” I began, looking over Julia’s shoulder and watching Monse run around the living room with Julia’s youngest kids. “Longer than you know... So I swear to God, Julia... If you hurt her the way you hurt me, I will make sure you live to regret it.”

The way she held her breath, as I coldly threatened her, was enough for me to be satisfied. I drove off without saying goodbye. Without even looking back to see if Julia was still standing on her front doorstep, but I knew she was. I wonder if she understood the irony in that.

With little to do, now that Monse was out of the house and my dad was getting ready to hit the road again, I decided to stop at Oscar’s on my way back home. For most of my life, he was the person I went to when I needed to vent to someone who got me.

And that was the thing that made me fall for him so quickly. He just... got me.

“You saw her?” He asked, as he fixed the both of us cups of coffee. Neither one of us were going to be sleeping anytime soon. Not with all the shit we had going on in our lives.

“Yeah,” I answered sadly, fiddling with the mug handle. Spooky took hold of my other hand; a thing he’d do anytime I started fidgeting with something. “She hasn’t changed... I wish Monse would see that.”

“You spent your whole life protecting her from Julia,” he reasoned. “She never had to know what she did to you guys... You didn’t want her to hurt the way you did growing up.”

I nodded. He was right, but that didn’t make the situation any less painful than it already was.

“I’m scared it’s gonna happen though,” I whispered, staring down at my mug as a way of keeping me from tearing up. “You should’ve seen how happy she was... How much trust she has that Julia’s actually changed.”

Oscar runs his hand over his mouth and down his chin, before gently squeezing my hand. 

“She has to find out somehow,” he stated, looking at me apologetically because nothing he could say could change what would inevitably happen. “We can’t protect them from everything... no matter how badly we wanna.”

And we couldn’t. I couldn’t protect Monse from our mom. Oscar couldn’t protect Cesar the world of the Santos. But we really wanted to. We really really did.

***

It had been a good handful of months since Monse and I saw Julia last. Much like I predicted, she hadn’t changed. And unfortunately for Monse, this meant she had to find out the hard way that our mother was an awful person. 

“You’re really not gonna go to the funeral?”

Monse and my dad were both dressed in their nicest black attire, whilst I was still wearing what I had gone to sleep in. I told them I wouldn’t step foot in Brentwood again, but it seemed that they only now understood how serious I was.

“Y/n,” my dad always spoke softly to the two of us, particularly when we were at a disagreement. “I really think you should come with us.”

I took a spoonful of cereal to my mouth and chewed loudly, before speaking again. This was my way of emphasising how little I cared for the matter at hand. Julia was dead to me a long time ago. I already did my grieving. She didn’t deserve so my respect, so I wasn’t about to pay that to her anytime soon.

“I’m not coming.” I looked at my dad and shook my head. He sighed, and took hold of the car keys, before grabbing his coat. Monse however wasn’t having any of it.

“I can’t believe you,” she said loudly, despite my dad’s attempts at calling her to go to the car. “Our mother is dead, Y/n. Don’t you think it’s important you go to her funeral?!”

I placed my bowl down abruptly, making my dad walk back into the kitchen, because anytime Monse and I dropped what was in our hands, shit was about to go down. 

“She’s been dead to me for a long time, Monse, I don’t owe that woman anything.”

I could feel my dad’s eyes widen, and I knew I was beginning to cross a line. Talking bad about Julia to my dad and Oscar before was one thing, but now that she was dead, and since this was Monse I was talking to, we were in uncharted territory.

“What about me, or her kids? You’re being so selfish, Y/n!” I ignored her and began putting my dishes away. It hurt hearing her say what she did, but I wasn’t in the mood to argue. Monse, however, apparently was. “You know you’re a lot more like her than you wanna believe.”

And I thought I was crossing a line.

“You better watch your mouth, Monse,” I growled, trying to keep myself from throwing something at my little sister. A spoon perhaps? “You have no right to say that to me. Unlike her, I’ve looked out for you from the beginning.”

We moved away from the kitchen island, and were now standing opposite each other, with all but my dad in our way. He held both his hands out, almost as a precaution in case one of us threw a punch.

“Oh please,” she spat. My dad glanced over at me. Knowing where this was heading, he knew how personal this was becoming for me especially. “I never asked you to become my mother.”

I gasped quietly, only just loud enough for my dad and I to hear.

“Y/n-”

I shook my head. There was no coming from this, at least not today. No matter how softly my dad spoke to me or how hurt Monse was by everything that had happened, I couldn’t bring myself to pretend like things were okay. They weren’t. They hadn’t been for a while, even before we found out about Julia.

No longer able to stand in the same room as Monse, I walked out of the kitchen and out of the house, making sure not to tear up until I was positive that I was definitely on my own. This wouldn’t last for long though because, just as I did in any time of crisis or mental breakdown, I headed towards Spooky’s place.

And just as well, by the time I got there, I saw his father walking away from the house, a duffel bag in his clutched hand- the same he had when he arrived from prison. I waited around the corner until he left, before approaching Oscar. 

I could tell that whatever argument they were having, it wasn’t one I needed to get involved in. 

“Spooky?”

Once realising I had seen what happened, he shakes his head, runs his hand over his mount and sits on the steps of his front door. Making no sudden movements, I slowly sat beside him.

“Did he leave?”

He flares his nostrils and looks up at the streetlights before nodding.

Shifting closer to him, I placed on hand around his waist and rested my head on his shoulder, only after placing a small kiss on the bare skin. 

“You not going to the funeral?”

I shook my head, before leaning into him. He takes his arm and wraps it around my frame, allowing me to lean into his chest. He was so good at showing me love, despite never receiving any from the people he needed it most from.

“How are you gonna tell Cesar?” I asked, looking up at him concerningly.

“... I don’t know,” he sighs.

“Why do we have to go through this?” I cried, placing my head in my hands. Oscar rubs my back gently all the while. “It sucks so much, you know? When Monse was staying at Brentwood she looked so happy... Why couldn’t we have had that growing up? Julia can give that to her white kids... but not to us.”

It was a rhetorical question of course. Spooky and I had our fair share of pain. We both knew how messed up things are for no apparent reason. 

“You know she wrote her a letter?” Again, a rhetorical question. I knew for a fact that Monse told Spooky about it in a drunken haze. “Despite everything that happened, Monse still cared about her.”

“... How about you?”

My lips began to tremble, because I finally began to understand why I held so much anger towards Julia. Why, even when she showed some kindness to Monse, I still couldn’t look at her without feeling so much rage in my heart.

As I began to tear up again, Oscar held me until I started to recover. I hated how much power that woman still ad over me. That even when she projected all of her internalised insecurities onto me for a good chunk of my life, I was still distraught that she was gone. That we’d never be able to reconcile our relationship.

The sun began to set when I rested my head on Spooky’s shoulder, and stared out into the block we called home; thinking about our two siblings, of whom we had to look out for. Of the innocence we were robbed of. Of the childhood we never got to enjoy.

“Do you think they’re gonna be okay?” He asks, staring just as intently as I was into the streets. 

“Yeah... They will.” And I really believed that.

“What about us?” This time he turns his to me and gazes into my eyes, emphasising how serious and intimate his question was. “Think we’ll make it?”

I couldn’t think of an answer that would accurately encapsulate my enthusiasm and confidence, so I took hold of his face and kissed him softly. And I could feel him smiling as I did so, pulling me closer to him with the strength of his arms.