#she is really only there to have a tragic backstory and get pregnant. for someone else's scheme

[beatriceportinari]

sorry can't get over this i know oc in fics are fine and often necessary if you want to flesh out a whole village so it's unfair to put them under more scrutiny but 😭😭😭😭😭 this poor lady only exists to punish izuna girl help

[zahri-melitor]

Okay because I am setting my expectations as low as possible in the hopes I get to be pleasantly surprised, here is the history of Black Canary as a solo title at DC:

Black Canary 1991: 4 issue miniseries. Probably best described as 'mediocre'. Dinah discovers Ollie's being an unemployed dropkick who has been stealing/borrowing money from the Sherwood Florist till and not accounting for it; out of her frustration at him she goes and beats up a drug cartel and white supremacists with the help of her new friend Gan Ngyuen, who would be a better boyfriend to Dinah than Ollie is being right now. In conversation with her Grell appearances, but seriously underestimates Dinah's actual skillset.

Black Canary 1993: 12 issue ongoing. Dinah's basically broken up with Ollie for the whole of this, which is completely fine by me, as Ollie uses some of his appearances in this book to accuse Dinah of sleeping with Ray Terrill. Who is 18 and was trying to look after the injured superhero who turned up on his doorstep. Time to go die in a firey helicopter crash, Ollie, you are terrible in the early 90s. Anyway, this is an incredibly uneven run that covers topics like Dinah's backstory, why Ray Terrill develops the biggest puppy crush on Dinah, and also the very first Nightwing-Oracle-Huntress-Black Canary team up. Tragically despite the compelling characterisation going on in this title between the four of them, the story they are in is a white slavery plot, rendering it almost impossible to recommend to people who aren't the sort to read every single appearance of a character.

Black Canary 2007: 4 issue miniseries. This would actually have been a compelling story apart from its intent and outcome. Dinah and Ollie, in the lead up to their wedding, grapple with combining their families and Dinah works with integrating Sin into the US educational system. Unfortunately, Sin is abducted and then Ollie fakes her death and doesn't tell Dinah what he's done, as he makes Connor take her off to one of the Himalayan monasteries various Arrows and companions have spent time at. Sin does not get to attend their wedding, and for some reason Dinah does not tell Ollie it's off even though he just faked Sin's death and lied to her about it.

Black Canary and Zatanna: Bloodspell 2014: Graphic novel. Paul Dini's pet project that he spent the best part of a decade trying to get DC to publish. The only decent Dinah solo on this list, it's not actually a Dinah solo because it's co-starring Zee. Dinah and Zatanna met each other as teens trying to live up to the expectations of their families, then reunite in Vegas after some of Dinah's friends tell her that someone's made them swear a magic oath to take part in a heist, and it's killing them. Hijinks ensue! This is the only title of any of them on this list that's actually full of joy. Please read it.

Black Canary 2015: 12 issue ongoing. 'What if Dinah decided to make Black Canary be the stage name of a musician in a band rather than a superhero?' Does this have any connections to previous Dinah characterisation? Not really, no. Does it sound like the premise of an Elseworlds rather than main continuity, even for n52? Yes. Dinah decides being a superhero is just too much work, so she'll be in a band instead, aside from all those times she needs to stop singing to fight crime in the audience. Contains a time travel plot involving Kurt Lance, aka the worst decision DC has ever made in regards to Dinah's love life, and I'm including Ra's al Ghul and marrying Ollie on that list. I think they made Kurt Lance save the universe but I admit I was hatereading at that point. The final issue has Dinah have her life flash before her eyes while retconning out most of the n52 changes to her characterisation and also suggesting she got pregnant with Ollie's baby at age 53 before dying of a mystery disease at age 69.

EDIT: Reminded of the Teen Book

Black Canary: Ignite 2019: DC teen graphic novel. Written by Meg Cabot, this is one of their teen alternate continuity rewrites set around the awkward period when Dinah was a teen and wanting to be a superhero like her mother, but Dinah Drake was firmly refusing to train her. Contains Larry Lance and is actually set in Gotham! (this is a good thing) On the other hand, maintains the 'was in a band' concept from Black Canary 2015, which personally I would rather stuff into a black hole never to be seen again, but angry teens singing in bands is a genre conceit for a reason. It's cute.

So really. Why would I let myself get my hopes up over Black Canary Volume 5?

[multiplebirthinwebcomics]

Multiple Births

Round 1 Poll 3

Read El Goonish Shive

Read Schoolbus Graveyard

Submitted context (including spoilers) and propaganda under the line

Ellen and Elliot : While they are twins, they aren't technically "same-birth" because Ellen was a duplicate of a gender-bent Elliot created by a magical artifact.

So, for context, one day Elliot got hit with a magical beam of "turns-you-into-a-hot-girl". In an attempt to disenchant Elliot using the magical artifact the "dewitchery diamond" the enchantment on him was actually extracted and transformed into a whole new person with an entirely new soul: a girl named Ellen, who has all of Elliot's memories, but is her own person. Ellen later gets a second set of fake childhood memories from a non-existent dream alternate universe where, among other things, she was raised as a girl, which helps her personality grow beyond just being a female duplicate of Elliot. All of this to say that the answers to the question "is Ellen Trans?" is "by any real-world definition, technically no. But beyond that, yes, very much so". (Side note: Elliot would later figure out that's he's "gender casual", in part because of Ellen asking him "haven't you ever wondered about the fact that I was able to adjust to being a girl so easily despite having all of your memories?")

Anyways, Elliot immediately viewed Ellen as his sister, and Elliot's parents immediately accepted Ellen as their daughter. Elliot/Ellen's friend Tedd's dad (who works for the part of the government that covers-up the existence of magic & hides it from most of society) used his authority/resources to make it so that all legal documentation says that Ellen is Elliot's twin sister, with the "official" cover-story that:

Mr. And Mrs. Dunkel couldn't afford to support themselves and two children, and could barely afford to keep one (Which. Technically, would have been accurate [since we later find out Mrs. Dunkel had to drop-out of college at 21 when she got pregnant with Elliot]). As a result, Ellen wound up in foster care. Now that the family is financially secure, she's been reunited with them

Regarding the "They fall in love with the same person" cliché, at the start of the comic, Elliot was dating Tedd's cousin Nanase. However, unbeknownst to both Elliot & Nanase at the time, Nanase was actually a Lesbian. Even though she really liked him as a person and they got along really well, she just wasn't interested in him romantically and was going through the motions trying to make the relationship work. She broke up with him when she realized that he had unresolved feelings with one of his childhood friends, because she knew he would be too passive to act on those feelings himself.

Flash forward to the storyline of Ellen's creation, and picture this: You're Nanase, you've recently broken up with the person who was the closest you've been able to get to really feeling something romantic for a guy, and after telling your gay best friend Justin this fact, he starts needling you about the about the possibility that you might be a lesbian, which you deny. But lo and behold, you are face to face with someone who is literally just said ex-boyfriend, but a super hot girl. You get close because you are one of the only people able to comfort her through the very traumatic experience of "being brought into existence with only memories of a life that aren't your own". And you feel things with her that you've never felt before.

Long-story-short, Nanase and Ellen develop mutual feelings for each other, confess said feelings, and become a couple."

Taylor and Tyler : They are each other's whole family (well their mother is alive but not very present since the death of their father). As of the last chapter, one might end up being used as a tragic backstory for the other.

[krikeymate]

Alternative scenario for the 10 year gap between the carpenter sisters.

Sam is 20 years old and hasn’t contacted her mother in over decade after she was taken by the social worker and bounced from foster home to another until she’s an adult.

One evening, someone knocks on her door and it’s the same social worker that took her, except she’s holding hands with a small girl whose backpack is barely holding on to her shoulder. The kid looks at Sam right in the eye, her gaze mixed with anger, fear, and, confusion and she doesn’t look a day older than 7.

The social worker introduces her as Tara, her little half sister and hopes dearly that Sam can take her in temporarily since she’s the closest living relative and ensured a weekly allowance to take of things financially. Just until best case scenario (mom gets clean and stable) or worst case (looking into adoption/foster care).

While feeling really empathic towards Tara, Sam wanted to say no because she was NOT ready to take of a severely asthmatic 10 year old (yes, she skimmed through her papers while they were talking) however she recognized that look in the girl’s face all too well and while she was reluctant and kinda shocked at this familial revelation, she said “okay, until you find something better.”

But there wasn’t anything better.

It wasn’t sisterly love at first sight. That took a while and they both had deep issues within regarding family, trust, and abandonment to work on and heal from.

They grew to love each other over time, they took care of each other in the ways they could, built their lives around each other that one can’t imagine life without the other.

3.5 years later, they’re at a courtroom and Sam finally got to sign the adoption papers and there was no going back.

We're one step away from straight up making Sam Tara's mum lmao.

Ok, so, anon, I fucking LOVE this. I adore you. I had to get back out of bed and onto my computer to respond to this. I've taken this in a slightly different direction, I hope that's ok? It hits the same beats, but I make it even sadder, because apparently, I love tragic backstories now.

So, nearly-10-year-old Sam gets removed from the Carpenter household, and Christina immediately gets pregnant again. She wants to fill the void that having her daughter taken from her has left (it was already there, it began the day her lover died, but she drowns those thoughts in alcohol), but it's not the same. This girl isn't like Sam, she isn't strong, she isn't his, she can't bring herself to feel anything for this mewling child.

Sam was removed because her mother was a constant drunk, she got behind the wheel with her daughter in the backseat, and crashed the car. They tell her she can have her daughter back if she gets sober, she never gets sober. Between constant drinking, barely eating, and baggy clothes, they never catch on that she's pregnant again, until 5 years later when the police are called about a domestic disturbance. Hicks finds the child hiding in a cupboard, hands cupped around her head, drawn by the noise of her wheezing.

The mostly absent father never bothered trying to get Sam back, he had a suspicion she wasn't his in the first place, drunken rambles from his wife suggesting so. He checked out of his marriage long ago, has lovers in every state he travels to for work. It's a marriage in name only, he considers leaving, until she reveals she's pregnant. He makes sure to get a paternity test this time, privately of course.

After the incident with the police, they threaten to take his daughter away from him, so he kicks Christina out, and takes custody of the girl. She never ends up going to school, he takes her with him when he travels. She spends the next 3 years mostly alone in hotel rooms, it's still not as bad as being with her mother. He still gets rough when he's mad, but she has cleaner clothes now - because sometimes he takes her with him to meetings to endear himself to the clients. And she gets sweets sometimes, a regular meal once a day. And medicine! She never knew what breathing was supposed to be like until the day the doctor handed her an inhaler.

She's 8 when her father overdoses in a seedy hotel room. She spends several days hiding in the shower, until the door is forced open by a lone security guard and a cleaner. Somehow she ends up back with her mother. That's where she stays until the day her mother tries to kill her. The neighbours hear the screaming and the crying and call the police. She doesn't put down the knife even when they point their guns at her. She just holds the child's hair in one hand and a knife to her throat with the other. They make a decision.

When Sam's first contacted, she thinks it's a joke. Both her parents are dead, and they left everything to her. Oh, and also she has a little sister, if she's interested in taking her in? She says no. They say understandable, and that she'll be handed over to the state. The man on the phone mentions the name of the home she'll be sent to - in case Sam is ever interested in connecting with her, and goes to hang up. She says wait. She remembers that home and how criminal it is that it's still open. Fuck it, she'll think about it. She wants to meet the girl.

Sam meets the girl at the social worker's office, in a room designed for children to play in. The girl sits, hunched over, in a chair at the table. She's still and doesn't lift her eyes. Sam thinks of the files she was given, the medical file, the police reports, and she wonders how this happened. Her father was absent and her mother a drunk, a little neglectful, but they weren't a bad people (not like some of the people who ran the foster homes). The files told another story, one Sam wished she remained ignorant of.

The girl is 10, but you wouldn't know it. So small and fragile, hair long and greasy, and skin pallid. It all serves to make the bruises stand out. The girl is wearing baggy clothes that Sam almost recognises, they used to be hers once upon a time.

Sam sits down and tries to greet the girl, and introduces herself. The social worker informs her that they can't get her to talk, that they think she can, that she just won't. Sam sits there for a while, observing the girl. After a while of silence, Tara looks up and the woman before her, and her eyes go wide. This woman looks like her mother, not quite the same, but enough for her heart to begin to thump. Sam sees the fear in her eyes as she looks at her, sees the way she clenches her jaw as she looks away, how she frowns, hands fisting in her lap. She remembers being this girl once upon a time, sitting in a similar room as a social worker spoke down to her.

The social worker sighs and ends the session shortly after, disappointed at the lack of progress. She takes Sam outside and apologises for wasting her time. Sam tells her she'll take her.

[rosettastarlight]

Since I’m finally feeling better, and I figured I should get this all out now before the life gets sucked out of me by the joy that is customer service during the Holidays, bleh, but this is basically headcanons I’ve got for the au where Jim Hopper and Vance Hopper are father and son. Obviously, this is full au since I’ve already discussed canon compliant because the timelines match up a lot better than you think for a tragic backstory, but anyway! Full au entails the Black Phone taking place around 1983 or 1984 which would make Vance only about a year or two above El (I can never see him past 14 whenever I post about him, so he’s 14 when he moves to Hawkins and 13 when he was kidnapped), where Vance ends up moving to Hawkins after his dad insists on seeing him more because both the Grabber and Disappearance of Will Byers would, um, definitely be incidents that made Hopper realize life’s too short. 

I feel like I should also mention I personally headcanon Vance as autistic, and I might give him traits I myself have. Also, that in this au, Vance would have been born in 1969-70 instead of 1964 to fit, and that the “Refrigerator mom theory” was only just starting to be discredited in the 60s and 70s, which was a theory people believed meant autism and neurodivergent symptoms in general were the parents’ fault because they didn’t give their child the correct amount of love and attention they should have during their developmental years. With that aside, I kinda tend to ramble, so if this is long, I’m sorry.

It’s mostly about some I have about Vance in general and the Hopper family before Sarah died, so on we go!

Hopper was still very much nervous about having kids due to the stories he heard from old friends who were exposed to Agent Orange with him, about their kids being born wrong or not at all, so he'd never been more relieved or happy when Vance was born perfectly fine if a little early. He figured he maybe got lucky, and wasn’t quite as anxious or felt as guilty about withholding the risks from Diane when she told him she was pregnant again nearly a year later.

Of course, when Sarah got sick with cancer, Jim realized he wasn’t the one that was lucky, Vance was, and he does wonder to himself sometimes through the years if maybe the reason Vance is so “different” is because the chemicals were passed down to him through Jim, too, just in a different way.

The camera shot of Hopper crying in the hospital stairwell is through the perspective of nine-year-old Vance who realized in that moment his sister was never getting better because his father never cries.

Vance is very touch averse unless you're close to him like friends, his parents or Sarah, and even then a warning is best, from behind is not advised without letting him know its you (after escaping the Grabber, coming up and touches from behind was completely off limits for a long while, it sent him into full fight or flight mode and you know exactly which one he's gonna pick), and sometimes touch can still get too much and he will make it known. He reacts really badly otherwise, if you are not close and you touch him, you get a warning on good days by just pushing you away and on bad days, expect him to swing at you.

Vance is not good at reading social cues or how he's supposed to react in certain situations, which results in his rude and standoffish behavior.

When he likes something, he gets very cautious with anything different, someone once posted that getting Vance to try something new is like getting a feral cat into a bath, and that's all I can see.

When getting instructions, Vance needs them super specific, he'll ask questions and such of what exactly he's doing or grabbing, it drives Jim up the wall and he tries to stay patient when Vance is practically interrogating him or when he's not specific enough which ends with Vance bringing back or doing the wrong thing he was supposed to.

This is both because Hopper knows his son just wants to be sure and do a good job and because he knows if he loses his temper and snaps at him, Vance will bring or do the wrong thing on purpose out of pure pettiness and spite.

Jim and Vance's similarities both divide them and bring them together. When Vance was a kid, it helped bond them because while Jim didn't entirely understand what Vance had, he did understand Vance got angry easily the same way he did when he was younger (although for different reasons, Jim because his dad was a fairly abusive douchebag, and Vance because he is easily overstimulated and had a lot of meltdowns.), and tried ways that helped his anger issues to help Vance that actually worked somewhat.

Big Hopper taught little Hopper how to fight. He thought it might help Vance to get the anger out since sometimes, to him, you just need to hit something, and would often encourage him to playfight or practice his punches when he could see Vance start to get overwhelmed at home.

Diane fought with him about it because she didn't like him encouraging violence to solve problems.

Hopper would also playing loud music on the car radio that he knew Vance liked to calm him down by being able to listen to just one, constant sound while he quietly coached him through breathing techniques.

Overall, neither he nor Diane really understood how to deal with Vance, they did try their best with varying results, but every now and then Vance tries to let them know the effort’s still appreciated.

Jim honestly doesn't mind Vance's aversion and just chooses to appreciate that he must be doing something right that Vance feels safe enough around him to consider his touch familiar and calming.

When they were still married, Diane mostly handled Vance since he needed to be handled somewhat delicately because of his aversions and hypersensitivity but at the same time needed to be taught his behavior wasn’t okay when the teacher called home for the tenth time that week on Wednesday. Meanwhile, because of Jim’s hesitance to be too strict or get angry with either of his kids, he let Sarah get away with a lot.

Daddy’s girl Sarah and Mama’s boy Vance.

I’m taking more my experiences with my brother as kids for this one since we don’t know a lot about Sarah.

Sarah and Vance were pretty close, actually, despite their differences, though Vance had to be reminded a few times to be gentle with his sister. Sometimes, the cute aggression would take hold, and he’d tackle her, poke, or pinch her playfully, and once or twice just pick her up to show he could and carry her around the house like a big teddy bear.

They would chase each other a lot and bring back home sticks, rocks, and whatever poor unfortunate worm they found on the sidewalk or grass outside.

They both loved animals and the zoo, and while never successful, would hide from their parents whenever they lured home a stray animal from mice to dogs.

Even as a kid, Vance would probably try to catch baby alligators if you let him, and “No, honey, you cannot pet the giant snake, just because it’s friend-shaped does not mean it’s a friend.”

Like most siblings, they did get into fights that would turn into brawls, but despite what Jim would ever believe, 8 times out of 10, Sarah did start it and she was a biter.

This is getting really long, so I’m just gonna make this part 1 of 2 and get back to this later.

[munariplans]

Hi, this is gonna be long, so sorry in advance.

There are some things I want to point out.

First, the team basically telling R to woman up and be good to her wife, that was golden. I know their relationship was strained, but while Natasha has the pregnancy to """"excuse"""" her recent behavior, R was being petty and downright kinda vengeful, like they were trying to make Nat pay for their frustrations. And I also understand the team wanting to protect Nat bc she literally spend like 99% of her life knowing only hurt and pain. She grew up being groomed to be a killer, to be evil, heartless, and yet she fights against those teachings everyday in order to do good. She deserves happiness more than anyone (I mean, her tragic backstory started out literally from birth. Poor girl deserves a break more than anyone).

Second, I really thought for a time there that R was really getting over themselves, but they honestly feel so childish and petty, so... Idk, lacking in the maturity department. They viewed everything Natasha did as a fight with all the "she won, I won", but Natasha literally recognized her mistakes and apologized most of the time, so she wasn't doing it out of pettiness or grumpiness or whatever, it was really just the hormones. But R took it as their mission to see these occurrences (bc really, there weren't even many times, if everyone got tired of their S/O bc they started a fight a handful of times there would be no couples at all) as a personal attack ("she won") instead of what they truly were (unthoughtful acts of a hormonal pregnant woman, nothing deliberately though out). Also, the last fight was completely justifiable, Nat had every right to be mad, literally every right, and R couldn't handle the simple truth, bc that's how they are.

Third... Don't even get me started on the bar thing. R then and there combined the two worst things a main character should be (and that's not a jab on your wiring, quite the opposite, you made lots of people hate the main character, that's a feat most people can't achieve, you were fucking brilliant) that was cowardly and un-empathetic. Like, how could they let someone talk about their WIFE like that? Do they really not care about her? And I'm not even saying love, I'm saying care, bc when you care ab someone, you never let someone talk ab them like that. Ever. Did they not have the courage to stand up to Ward, did they not care about Nat, or was it both?

And forth, the Wanda thing seemed, once again, so fucking petty. They clearly don't care about Wanda too, bc if they did they wouldn't stir up her hopes by calling her. And let's just say they decide to leave Nat for Wands, how would Wanda feel seeing the child grow up without the other parent bc of her(bc R clearly doesn't have the maturity to co-parent a child, they'd bail the second things got a bit hard)? How would she feel when the team shut her out (bc that's clearly what they would do) after they find out? She'd feel like shit, but she'd endure bc of R bc that's Wanda for you, but she'd still feel like shit, and R would be the reason. So if R thought about her well being for even just a second, they'd have backend off ages ago.

Fifth, I could see how hard R was trying, I even could see them loving Nat again, but I honestly don't think they're going to work out with anyone (not Nat, not Wanda, not anyone), bc they're too immature, petty and self centered to be in a relationship.

Yeah... That's it, sorry for the rant.

not a rant, always appreciate your views anon :)

[mermaidsirennikita]

ARC Review: Meet the Earl at Midnight by Gina Conkle

2.25/5. (Re)releases 10/6/23. This is a review of the audiobook, narrated by Marian Hussey.

Vibes: Beauty and the Beast, nerdy hero, a surprisingly experienced heroine, forced marriage.

When Lydia is taken to meet the reclusive Earl of Greenwich, Edward, she doesn't understand that her stepfather and brother have put themselves in debt to the earl. The only payment he wants? A wife to give him an heir. Although she doesn't intend to go through with the marriage, Lydia accompanies the earl to his estate, where she quickly discovers that there is much more to him--and his plan for the future--than meet the eye. If she marries him, he plans on giving her relative freedom within a short amount of time; but once she actually gets to know Edward as a person, will she want it?

Here's the thing. Gina Conkle is a solid writer, I love Beauty and the Beast, there are some unique takes on the character beats here, and the leads have chemistry. So why didn't this work for me?

Well--pacing is everything.

Quick Takes:

--I want to point out the things I found unique about this book, which was originally published nearly a decade ago. Lydia is a fun, confident heroine who isn't a rebellious renegade type, but also isn't at all missish. She's not a virgin, and there isn't some particularly tragic backstory to all that. She just wanted to get with a guy and he turned out to be a douchebag. But she had fun before that! She's described as a "hoyden" a little too often, and at times she can be a bit too perky, but overall, I found her likable and I appreciated that she wasn't just this sweet girl who existed purely to soothe Edward's tormented soul.

And despite Edward being one of those heroes who has this super beautiful one side of his face and a super scarred other side, he kind of defies a lot of the stereotypes there. Yes, he avoids society; but he's not nearly as tortured about the scars as you would expect, and a lot of his character arc revolves around him being like. Obsessed with plants. And worms. Did this always work for me? Uh, well, no, but I appreciated the creativity.

--Edward and Lydia do have chemistry, and there is an immediate sexual tension between them that is boosted by the fact that she knows what sex is and does in fact like it. She's not afraid of her own sexuality, or his for that matter, and that was a really nice change of pace. And like I said, the writing is good, which makes it easy to get engaged from the start. The issue is that the early engagement and momentum is totally lost, because...

--The pacing of this book is really off, and I have to think that a different editorial hand would have perhaps tightened it up. I was kind of shocked when I realized how little had happened at the 50% mark, because you really do begin so strongly. I was excited about the beginning. Like, I thought these two were going to GET DOWN to the business pretty quickly, based off the immediate sparks and innuendo.

What begins the slowdown is the fact that Lydia tells Edward she's not a virgin, which he isn't super bad about, the bar is underground, but... He does insist that they wait a month before getting married in order for him to ensure that she's not carrying another man's child. Which is not an unheard of trope in historicals, I've seen it before.

However, here it doesn't make sense for a couple reasons. For one thing, when the book begins Edward is going to basically dip for a long journey in three months, and the journey is long and dangerous and family trauma and so on, and as such he wants to basically leave a wife behind, pregnant with his heir. Already, this is kind of a flimsy plan because, as the book acknowledges, that is not a lot of time to get someone pregnant. Also, it might not even be a boy. Hell, it might not even be born alive. But whatever, I can wave that away.

But if the need for an heir--which is more about satisfying familial legacy obligations than Edward's own personal desires for an heir--is so great, and he is willing to have Lydia stay at his estate for the month prior to the marriage anyway... Why not just go ahead. Does the child have to be HIS? I mean, who could really prove anything? Additionally, why does he have to wait a month? Just wait until her next period, which will probably come sooner. (This is a tactic used to great effect in Elizabeth Lowell's Untamed, where the hero is like ready to GO as soon as she's had her period, and if that worked for Medieval Times McGee, I don't know why it couldn't work for Georgian Botanist Earl.) I mean, it's not foolproof, but it's pretty good and will give you some extra time to try. Sort of. Not really sure how that lines up with fertile windows, but honestly! I don't think local Georgian Botanist Earl does either!

--And after this one big obstacle to our leads at least knowing each other carnally (I mean, I'm not saying they have to be IN LOVE early in the story, but at least getting somewhere) occurs, there are then a million little broken moments. Oops, his mom walked. Whoops, here's his housekeeper. Oh no, here's an Issue. It just killed the excitement I had and made me really, really frustrated.

I'm all for obstacles to lovers being together, but this felt like obstacles to basic progress, and that just hurts a romance, always.

--To be clear, I would say that if you love love love a slow burn, this may work for you. I found the degree of slow burn contrived. However, I won't deny that the sexual tension in this novel was well done, and those who throw down for a slow burn above all else may really like this. I'll admit: if I'd known how slowly this burned ahead of time, I wouldn't have requested it, because slow burns are pretty hit or miss for me and prolonged slow burns often don't work for me at all.

--That said, on an audiobook note, Marian Hussey is a very good narrator. I've heard her narrate books before, and she does a very good job of differentiating male voices in a pleasing way--voicing the opposite gender well is always tough, so I appreciate that.

The Sex:

There is one sex scene. It's solid, but it is very late in the story, and you don't really have much physical buildup to it. Furthermore, because this sex scene happens so late in the story and so much hinges on these two consummating the relationship, you then have a total rush to the finish line of the entire romance arc, physicality aside.

Ultimately, I just felt like this was a great start that totally wasted its own potential. Which kind of annoyed me more than a book that was bad from the start would. I'm not against trying other works by Gina Conkle because she clearly has the ability to write romance, but I do think I'll need to read some reviews first to ensure that the pacing quickens.

Thanks to Netgalley and NYLA for providing me with this audiobook. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

[veilchenjaeger]

You Yi is a holy terror when it comes to interior decoration. (I say affectionately as someone whos' disproportionate sense for aesthetics is only sometimes kept in check by an almost equally gigantic sense of practicality mostly developed by tripping over unpractical pretty stuff.)

Also Xu You Yi met her husband because he hit her with a car. WTF. And then he get's really hung up on her still owning jewelry from a previous relationship even though she's literally marrying him?! WTF DUDE. You Yi's taste in men is shit. I hope my last ask didn't come off as me blaming You Yi for her ex-husbands everything. I'm just still stuck on the fact that their relationship started because he hit her with his car and she lost her baby. WTF. I mean he did also take a hit out on her, after she files for divorce and then do a 180 in attitude once he finds out she's pregnant. But it's not quite as surprising as the other stuff. Wow, Zhou Heng is rapidly climbing the shitty literature boyfriend list. And there are a lot of people on there.

Ssdhfjsdfj I'm loving the liveblog

The first meeting reveal really does say so much about their relationship, doesn't it? Zhou Heng and their marriage are so interesting to me bc of how slowly all the fucked-up shit is revealed. Like, sure, there's the reveal that he's a horrible person and not just kind of a dick who cheated on his wife, but I agree that this doesn't hit as hard as the reveal that their relationship is rotten to the very core. It didn't suddenly go bad when Zhou Heng started his affair with Zhang Wan! The very foundation of their relationship is fucked.

I guess they could have walked the "hitting her with a car" thing off, "My husband is cheating on me and I need a safe place to cry" isn't exactly a meet-cute either. And I think Youyi probably thought they did walk it off? But it's such a traumatic event for her, and I cannot help but think that Zhou Heng took advantage of her vulnerability when he started courting her right after she lost her child and basically became the reason she could become successful. And that's all on top of the fact that there was no trust between them from Zhou Heng's side from the day of their wedding. The affair was just the final nail in the coffin, there was always something deeply wrong with this marriage.

I also think it's really fun that Youyi has her own tragic backstory, it explains a lot about her impressive ability to go from cheerful to stone fucking cold. She's been through it once already, she can deal with this.

[mcrcki]

Was that [VICTORIA PEDRETTI]? Oh no no, that was just [ELAIN ARCHERON], a [CANON CHARACTER] from [A COURT OF THORNS AND ROSES]. They are [TWENTY TWO] years old, use [SHE/HER], and [ARE] aware that they are not actually from Washington DC. Too bad they can’t stray from this city for long.

how long has your character been here -

just barely a few hours, honestly, i'm thinking she's gonna be one of those people who just immediately showed up and girl is not doing super great with it. elain is not someone who handles big changes well, so this is ?? a lot

what is your character’s job -

once she is settled in, she is absolutely going to be opening a bakery!!

where has your character been pulled from in their fandom -

ok i have not finished acosf yet, we are about ???? a quarter of the way through, so that's where i'm pulling elain from. the last thing she remembers is feyre telling the inner circle that she's pregnant! i'll update this as i finish reading, the book is just CHONKY and it's taking me longer than the other volumes lmaoo

has any magic affected your character -

nope! elain is the same elain as always, honestly, she's been changed enough from magic she is not looking to get her memories or anything else messed with, thank you so much!!!

other notes -

damn do i love a soft vibe tragic backstory bitch, this time in faerie form! so original!! anyways, elain is my angel and i don't want to hear anything bad about her ever thank you so much goodnight -- pls enjoy me info dumping the current hyperfixation

elain is the middle child of the archeron family, having always been closer to her older sister nesta in comparison to her younger sister feyre. their mother always claimed elain was going to marry for her looks and for love, her family constantly putting a lot of weight into her appearance for that

she's always found some sort of peace and quiet in gardening however, though her love of baking didn't come till later. tending to her garden was one of the few things that elain still had control over, when everything else in the archeron life was falling apart

she and her father are the only ones who are affected by tamlin's glamour once he takes feyre to prythian.

this girl is just so kind, she is sad over the death of a like great aunt that literally never existed but she is still bummed about it

just wanted to travel the world and see flower festivals with feyre and enjoy their lives together and then so much shit goes wrong so fucking fast !!!!! so--

ok at this point im going into spoilers for a court of mist and fury and beyond so anyone reading ( @ jodie and risa ) don't read on !! all you gotta know is this is a sweet summer child and i would die for her

during acomsf elain is engaged to a human boy, the son of a lord who just absolutely hates faeries. homeboy is like a doomsday prepper but for faeries invading the mortal lands. so ofc when feyre comes back with just a whole fucking group of faeries, elain is understandably a little worried and she doesn't want it to get back to her fiancé. she stuck around for the meeting though and honestly good for her, she is loyal as hell and we love her for that

and then she's just kinda gone until the end of that book when she and nesta are fucking kidnapped and forcibly made into faeries by being thrown into the cauldron by the king of hybern, to literally just prove a fucking point, to make it clear that it can do that!!! (there is so much more during these scenes that i dont want to explain bc again spoilers but damn the end of that book is a nightmare of drama)

anyways, elain is tossed into the cauldron like a sack of potatoes and just dumped onto the fucking floor, having gone through possibly the most traumatic thing anyone could really go through and light of my life, dumb bitch #1 lucien really looks at her and goes "you're my mate" like my love, some tact. time and place

i love lucien don't get me wrong , just that line in the midst of everything?? what a time

mor takes the sisters away from hybern, hides them up (i think up at their cottage???) , when feyre goes back to the spring court with tamlin. enter the poor way all of prythian handles trauma --

(literally is no one in all of this faerie or human lands a fucking therapist , pls can we get the sisters to talk to ANYONE)

ok a court of wings and ruin -- elain has gone almost completely nonverbal with grief and ptsd and very poor adjustments!!! except for some weird freaky cryptic comments that everyone just looks at her like "ok honey let's go back to bed"

she has not accepted her change into fae, and spends like weeks just crying and talking about her upcoming wedding to greyson. like genuinely, all i want to do is hug this woman she needs a good hug. esp cause, while again i love him, lucien is not helping matters like at all. he's doing so much, and it's just.. buddy pls some space (i would love a lucien tho so they can maybe one day talk about their shit together)

either way, elain is finally starting to talk a little bit, but again it's that cryptic shit, that after a few weeks of it, the only person who seems to actually understand what's going on is azriel! shoutout to you az! cause surprise, the cauldron made my girl a seer!!! and she is so afraid !!!!

anyways, she starts to kind snap out of it once there is a name for what's going on, once people start realizing that she isn't like.. out of it, just seeing the future. she starts to bake with nuala and cerridwen-- the two maids rhys employees. literally that is one of the biggest things that pulls elain out of this mess of grief that's in her mind. it's still her solace even now, baking is where things make sense for her. she loves gardening, but there is something about baking that just clears her mind like nothing else.

eventually the inner circle makes their way to greyson and his family's estate for the express purpose of trying to get them to agree to take in human refugees in the upcoming war. they glamour elain so that she still appears human but my boy jurian is out here being a bigger gossip than the suriel and already told them everything. greyson like screams in elain's face to end their engagement (and i became a nesta stan in that moment ty for slapping the shit out of that boy)

losing greyson for good really set elain back off on the bad path of nonverbal constant crying. she barely leaves the war tents, only moves outside of them when the camp has to move, and is just going through a terrible heartbreak like pls can she catch a singular break!!!!!

she sure fucking cant!! bc she gets kidnapped by the cauldron and taken into the heart of hybern's camp almost immediately after!!!!!!!!!!! again shoutout to azriel for just jumping right in for that rescue mission with feyre , you're a superstar.

so war happens , elain stays mostly out of it thank god, she is not a fighter. but i will die on the hill that she deserves recognition for killing the king of hybern!! ik nesta cut off his head but elain is the reason nesta was still alive!!!!! to do it!!!!! she is the person who stabbed him first!!!!!! and she deserves that title just as much as her sister!!!!!!!

elain and her sisters lose their father in the fight, and while elain is in mourning , she goes to visit the memorial spot that feyre had created for him quite often. but she returns to velaris with her friends, her new family and is honestly, pretty well adjusted by the end of it, like she's really coming out of this on the other side doing pretty well all things considered.

for the novella -- elain's visions are mostly gone, she is adjusting well, honestly she's just vibing, baking and hanging out with the twins, there's a lot of like innerworkings of her relationships between lucien and azriel and pls don't ask me who i ship her with i simply do not know and would rather her just be happy with no man before she gets stuck in something for centuries

ok final bit i promise i know my intros are always disgustingly long but a court of silver flames!!!! this is where i'm pulling elain from, but since i am still reading it, she is only going to be pulled from the first like quarter of it

the last thing that elain remembers from home is feyre and rhys telling the inner circle that they're expecting, and her fight with nesta at the house. she remembers nesta snapping at her over their father's death, when elain wanted nothing more than to just check on her sister, to make sure hse was adjusting well. she left the house crying, having thought the training with cassian was supposed to be helping nesta but, she is more skeptical than ever.

here in dc, elain is definitely going to be like, relieved to find people that she knows, will be settling in with her bakery once she is .. adjusted. she doesn't handle change super well so it's gonna take some time before she feels confident in the city but i cannot wait until we are at that point

connections :

✩ friends!!

honestly please just be her friend , she is such a kind soul and will look after you and be the sweetest person, i just think she would do really well with a group of friends that like lift her up and are more high energy than her, just good vibes

✩ employees

once she opens her bakery, she's gonna need people to come work for her so :)))

✩ maybe someone she could nanny for

i think while she is getting used to the city and settling in she might try to pick up some odd jobs here and there before she settles into owning a whole bakery and i think she'd like the idea of helping people like that

✩ someone to help her adjust

like a guide to dc kinda vibe, someone that can explain the modern world, help her out so she doesn't feel like she is burdening her family by having them have to like walk her through all of this

✩ trauma bonding buddies

someone wanna talk about their issues with her and provide a safe space so she can finally talk about her own shit!! thanks sm !!!

✩ potential ship

i genuinely don't know if i'm going to go with canon ships or whatnot and would love to have elain just like.. branch out before she settles into anything. this would be CASUAL like not an endgame ship right off the bat (obviously if chemistry works out we can chat but) mostly just looking for someone to make her feel like she is not stuck with some predestined fate

[theprinceandthewitch]

I cannot stress this enough: I don't like the sibling bullshit going on - not because it "get's in the way of my ship" or whatever idiotic nonsense rage-baiters want to spout. I am way too old for that dumbass shit and I consume media differently than most people do.

I'm training myself to analyze story structures so I can pick apart media I like. I enjoy figuring out how they work (or don't work) so that I can better write my own stories and then maybe become an editor down the line.

So this isn't, "Oh I'm upset my ship isn't canon". It's more like "It makes no sense to "siblingfy" the type of boy the main character likes and would have got together with him if circumstances were different. It also doesn't make sense for Hunter to become Camilla's kid and not Darius's. It also doesn't make sense for Hunter to stay in the human realm with Camilla given his position as the literal prince of TBI."

Most people don't realize that shows take literal years to produce.

So the people who work on it are going to have certain details slip from their mind. This is especially true if you're not on the writing team. Voice actors have daily obligations to attend to on top of doing other projects. Would YOU call two characters siblings if you remembered:

They had a fake-out kiss moment (in Hunting Palismen). This was a call back to a sleeping prince needing to be awoken with a kiss from the proof of concept video.

Luz is into angsty warrior prince types with tragic backstories and animal sidekicks... just like Hunter. Hunter at this point is nearly identical to Nevareth - you know, that dude Luz was drooling all over in the second episode of the series. Literally the only differences between these two is body type. (There's a chance Hunter could also lose an eye but I'm not going to get into that now.)

That drawing of Luz kissing a prince that looks like Beta Hunter in "Sense and Insensitivity"

Saw Luz saying she hopes see meets a "hot yet vulnerable upperclassman" in "First Day"

Saw how Hunter and Luz parallel Evelyn and Caleb. Luz and Hunter have romantic undertones because of this. Evelyn and Caleb were lovers, this was apparent in Hollow Mind. In one of the paintings you can SEE that she's pregnant. It's the one where they're running away together. This isn't a tale about "two very good friends" or "two siblings" - they were LOVERS. Luz and Hunter cannot escape this just because they never get together or become actual siblings. Now, do you see how the latter is the worst direction you can go?

How could anyone not think it'd be weird to "siblingfy" Luz and Hunter knowing all this? Another thing people seem to forget is that voice actors who are not writers are allowed to like headcanons.

This was really rampant in the Voltron (2016) crew. Writers AND VA were supporting Shiro/Keith as a romantic pairing DESPITE the age gap and that Shiro met Keith when he was a child. And that they, you know, never ended up together.

I also want to point out it just doesn't make sense for Hunter to live with Camilla in the human realm. You all have to remember that he didn't want to go back to the demon realm because he is the literal prince who helped Belos with his plans.

Besides Separate Tides and Hollow Mind, we never get to see Hunter on the missions Belos sends him on. But do you seriously think Hunter never caused harm to people? He's afraid he'll be recognized - and he has been recognized by his voice before. You don't think the people are going to want reparations from a member of the monarchy that attempted genocide on them? You don't think someone might try to harm him if they found out who he is? Of COURSE he's reluctant to go back to the demon realm.

Hunter may be a teenager, but he isn't above the consequences of his actions. He still needs to make it up to the people he ruled over. He needs to make up for the hurt he caused before The Day of Unity. He needs to be the one who cleans up the mess his "uncle" caused.

It was so obvious he wasn't going to get his little happily ever after in the human realm because he was never going to get the opportunity to run away from accountability.

That's why it makes the most sense for him to stay in the demon realm with Darius. Darius can help him repair the damage caused by Belo's reign and maybe even dissolve the monarchy entirely. Which by the way, WOULDN'T be a quick fix. Do you really think you can undo 50 years of pain in an afternoon? Do you really think that Hunter would just be able to get on everyone's good side even if he killed Belos and stopped The Collector?

Also it just doesn't make sense for the writers to set-up this connection between Hunter and Darius if they were just gonna drop it entirely. Darius isn't some rando adult in his life - he has ties to the Golden Guard who came before him - he has ties to Hunters "family". He can give him a connection to his "family" that Camilla cant give him. While Darius and Hunter's relationship wasn't the best pre-Day of Unity - Darius did display some affection for Hunter. He is obviously going to reconcile with Hunter down the line.

And another thing... It literally makes no sense for Darius and Camilla to get hitched. Why should Camilla and Luz help in cleaning up a mess the literal puritanical white man caused to that degree? Why would Camilla and Luz even take on that responsibility? It's not their mess to clean up.

It's Hunter's mess to clean up - whether he likes it or not. He can't stay in the human realm with Camilla because doing so gives Hunter the opportunity to dodge accountability. That's why Flapjack had to die - it had to be something that devastating to give him a reason to return home and take accountability for his actions and his "uncles" actions.

[lovely-angst]

single dad!dabi

a/n: i KNOW dabi’s cannonly(?) can’t cry, but let’s just ignore that fact in this fic :^) also ty for waiting patiently for me to post! <3

genre: angst

pairing: dabi x f!reader

summary: dabi had started a family with you, but when he suddenly becomes a single father, now what?

word count: 2.4k

06.29.21

-

The sounds of an infant cry filled the small apartment as the night grew on. The sun had long gone and the moon filled its place in the sky as the city fell into a slumber—it seemed as if the only ones up were Dabi and the small child in his arms. 

Her mouth opened wide as her powerful cries rang in Dabi’s ears as he tried cooing the young girl back to sleep. A bounce in his step as he paced around the small bedroom he shared with his three-month-old daughter, Aya. 

Dabi tried shushing her gently, attempting to soothe her, but to no avail. 

He felt as if he was going crazy. He had tried everything at this point—a warm bottle, a change of fresh diaper, heck, even some snuggles, but nothing seemed to work. 

Dabi could feel his eyes sting with upcoming tears as his frustrations grew and grew. Setting Aya down in her crib, her wails grew louder before Dabi turned around and slumped against the crib, defeated. 

Reaching over towards his nightstand, Dabi gently picked up the photo of you before bringing it closer towards him, his glossy eyes running across your familiar features before he brought his large hands towards his face.

And cried. 

He cried and cried and cried.

“I can’t do this, (Name),” he sobbed into your photo, his wails mixing in with those of his daughter’s. “I don’t know what to do anymore. I can’t help Aya, she needs you,” he stated, pulling back to stare at your photo once more. 

“I don’t know how to do this without you. You were supposed to be here with us—we were supposed to do this together,” his cries had died down, allowing him to wipe the photo dry of his tears. 

Leaning his head back on the crib, Dabi’s eyes roamed over the small bedroom. It was messy, just as messy as his life was currently without you. Picking up one of your shirts from the floor, Dabi let the fabric rest in his hands before bringing it up to his chest to hold. 

It still faintly smelled like you.

His daughter’s cried came back to his ears and Dabi stood back up, tucking the shirt in his young daughter’s arms before watching her cries gently soothe away from your scent. 

“Yeah,” Dabi started, bending down to pick his daughter up before bringing her towards the bed with him, “I miss her too.”

-

It felt like yesterday when you told Dabi you were pregnant. It came as a shock to him of course—he was just hitting his twenty-fifth birthday and he was about to become a dad?

He was never really the one to think about kids or even having kids himself—but that all changed once you came into the picture. 

“I know you’re scared, I’m scared too,” you say, grabbing hold of his hands before giving him the prettiest shy smile, “but if I’m honest, I’m really excited to become a mom. I love you so much, Dabi. I can’t wait to love our baby.”

You were so excited and he couldn’t help but anticipate the day his baby would be born. 

Dabi knew you would be a great mother. On the other hand, he was nervous—but if you were going to put in all this effort to love and raise this baby with someone like him, then Dabi knew he had to give it his all too. 

He’ll make sure that his child lives a better life than he ever will. 

He decided to cut his ties with the league, ending his time as a highly wanted villain. It wasn’t easy getting Shiggy to agree, but with a little bit of convincing and a little explanation about his tragic backstory, Shiggy finally agreed. 

If he was going to be a dad, he wanted to do it right. 

Everything was going great throughout the pregnancy. Dabi was there for you as much as he could, helping you, providing for you and his baby. Basking in those little moments of realizing that he was going to be a dad. 

Reality began to hit when you had gone into labor. It would have been fine if Dabi were a normal citizen, but Dabi was a villain and because of that, he wasn’t able to be with you when you were giving birth in the hospital. 

It crushed him more than you could have known—to have his unofficial wife alone during such a difficult, excruciatingly painful and life-changing journey. There were times Dabi wished he could be a normal citizen like you, and this was one of those times. 

It wasn’t until you got discharged a few days later when Dabi was able to see you again. It was also the first time Dabi had gotten to see his baby. 

You were finally back in the apartment, Dabi helping you up the stairs to the apartment as he eyes the little bundle in your arms. ��You can hold her too, you know,” you say with a smile when you caught him staring for the millionth time.

“Her?” Dabi asked voice caught in his throat. “Welcome Aya to the world,” you say, placing her in his arms the moment the two of you sat on the couch together. 

His breathing stopped the moment Aya was placed in his arms. She was tiny. Dabi didn’t know that humans came this small. He was scared of accidentally breaking her, and from the way you laughed, he could tell you knew. 

Dabi watched you closely as you taught him how to carefully bathe her, change her, feed her, and even burp her. He remembered the times your laughter would fill the air whenever Aya spit up all over him, or even the times her little body was able to create such a smelly masterpiece for him. 

He always thought he would hate being a father, yet here he was. Sleeping soundly with his baby girl.

Three months into having his baby girl were some of the best days of his life. Sure they were tough and going off practically no sleep was rough, but he wouldn’t trade this domestic life for anything. 

It made him feel like a normal person.

But all good things come to an end.

As Dabi strolled along during one of his scouting missions, his phone rang and vibrated in his pockets before he reached in for it. He really only had the phone, so you could contact him if you were in some deep waters, which he hoped would never happen.

To his surprise, it wasn’t you who called, but Hawks.

“What? You better have a good reason for calling, or I’ll-”

“It’s about (Name),” Hawks cuts off, “you better come quick,” and with that, Hawks ended the call, leaving Dabi’s thoughts unanswered. A small ping resonating in the air as Hawks left him with a single address.

Though Hawks’ call was brief and left a lot for Dabi to figure out himself, he knew it bad news awaited him. He just hoped it wasn’t as terrible as his thoughts led him to. 

“What was so urgent?” Dabi asked as soon as he stepped around the corner of an empty alleyway only to find Hawks’ red wings filling his sight. “Where’s (Name)?” 

As soon as your name left Dabi’s lips, Dabi could see the way Hawks’ feathers shifted before the winged man himself, turned towards Dabi, finally giving him the view of what he most dreaded. 

There you lay—eyes closed and chest unmoving. Dabi’s eyes widened before he ran towards your body, where thankfully, it rested on Hawks’ thick jacket and not on some dirty alleyway like this. 

“(Name)? Hey, wake up, I’m here,” Dabi tried, gently shaking your shoulders and brushing your cheek with the back of his hand. 

“Dabi,” Hawks started, voice strained, “she’s gone.” 

Those words seemed so unreal that if Dabi blocked them out of his head, then it surely wouldn’t be true. Stared at your limp body in front of him, it was all just a bad dream.

“I...I was with her during her last moments. I found her while on patrol, it was a gunshot wound,” he informed, watching Dabi caress your cheek. 

“I made sure she left peacefully, I talked about you to her.” Hawks tried, “and she smiled. She told me to tell you to take care of Aya for her.” 

As Dabi turned around, his eyes quickly focused on Aya, who was sound asleep in Hawks’ arms. Taking a step forward, Hawks placed Aya in Dabi’s arms before Dabi began quietly sobbing while clutching his daughter.

Hawks had never seen Dabi look so broken and desperate before and it was quite painful to see. Villain or not, Hawks never wanted anybody to go through this. 

“I’m sorry for your loss, Dabi.” 

Though the two weren’t good buddies in any way, they both had you in common. As much as it hurt to see you go, Dabi asked Hawks to take you away and give you a proper burial as you deserve. And Hawks didn’t bat an eye at his request. 

Giving you one last final kiss goodbye, Hawks lifted you in his arms, ready to take flight. “Hey,” Hawks starts, catching Dabi’s attention, “if you ever need anything for Aya, just let me know.” 

Dabi couldn’t help the slight curl in the corner of his mouth at Hawks’ words. “I don’t want to owe favors.” 

Hawks smiled back at the man in front of him, throwing his visor on, “You don’t have to worry, she’s in good hands,” and with that, his large red wings spread and he took flight into the air with you. 

And it was the last time Dabi would ever get to see you.

-

It had nearly been a month since you left—Dabi doing his very best trying to raise Aya as a single father. It was hard. No, more than hard. Being a single father to a three-month-old with no mother was the most challenging thing Dabi has ever done. 

And he was starting to doubt his abilities as her father. He was running low on money to provide for Aya and himself, and there would be days where she just wanted you instead, which would break his heart. 

Dabi felt like a failure; to you and Aya. 

As he cradled a drowsy Aya on his chest, Dabi glanced over at the fridge that held up a little note with an address written on it—the location you were resting at.

Hawks had sent that note to him, but Dabi had never mustered up the courage to come out and see you. He didn’t want you to see him like this, struggling to his core. Because if you were here, he knew he wouldn’t be struggling like this.

But for some reason, that note was calling out to him. 

Walking into the bedroom, Dabi began searching the closet where Aya’s dresses were hung up. Holding her small body in one of his arms, he went through each little outfit with a slight smile on his face. 

You loved shopping for Aya, and all of these cute outfits were the product of that. 

Taking a dress off the rack, he held it up before glancing down at Aya, “Do you think your mama will like this on you?” His low voice vibrated through his chest and onto Aya, causing her to open her beautiful blue eyes up at him.

She glanced over at the outfit before making a face, tears filling her eyes and Dabi immediately out the dress back. “Your mama always did say I had bad fashion sense.” he chuckled before searching for a new outfit. 

And did he find the perfect one. 

Setting Aya down on the bed, he changed her into the outfit before smiling at her once he laid eyes on her fully dressed little chubby body. Boy, did you and him make a cute kid. 

“Okay, let’s go. Mama’s waiting.” 

Before making his way to you, Dabi bundled himself up well in his wind breaker, mask, sunglasses, and gloves. He took the less populated route, but he couldn’t avoid everybody. Thankfully, Aya was able to distract them from the fact that they were beside a wanted villain. 

Dabi followed Hawks’ instructions on the note before finding himself in front of your grave as he entered the cemetery. His heart fell from the reality of the situation—being here in person just made it all the more real that you were gone. 

Placing the flowers that he got you down in the little holder, he let out a heavy sigh, “I’m sorry it took so long to come see you, (Name).” 

His eyes continuously read over your name engraved into your tombstone as he sat down with a heavy heart, “It’s so hard doing this without you, you know? Aya really needs you.” 

Dabi didn’t want to seem like he was complaining to you, never. He had a lot on his chest, and simply, he missed talking to you. 

He went on about his days and the new milestones Aya has been hitting, telling you how much you would’ve loved to see her smile. “She looks so much like you, it’s crazy. Even though she’s just three months old, I’m glad she does.” 

It was weird to Dabi how much peace this was bringing him. Yes, he knew you were no longer with him, but talking to you like this, being with you like this, made it seem like you never left his side. 

With a final sigh, Dabi leaned over and pressed a kiss on your tombstone, bring Aya closer so she could also mirror his actions, “I love you,” he whispered, brushing his fingers across your engraved name, “we’ll be back soon.” 

It was quite an experience there, a healing one. Dabi knew his struggles and knew that he needed to reach out for help, and talking to you gave him the courage to do so. He didn’t want to seem weak, but building this strength to ask for help, made him stronger than anyone else. 

So, Dabi walked until he reached a familiar place and when he stepped inside and the eyes of his old comrades focused on him, his shoulders softened. 

“Thought you’d never come back,” Toga said with a toothy smile as she ran over to hug her old friend, “sorry to hear about (Name).” 

“So, this is what’s kept you so busy,” Kurogiri states as he glanced down at the little girl in Dabi’s arms. A hand landed on Dabi’s shoulder and he turned and noticed those bright red wings of the pro hero, “It’s nice to have you back. (Name) would be happy to see you like this.” 

Though they may be seen as criminals from the outside view, Dabi knew these would love and support his baby girl with their lives—and that’s all that mattered.

[lambourngb]

Day 2: AU get me out of here - places to go when canon is complicated

It’s Day 2 for @roswellnewmexicocreate, time to celebrate those stories that I turn to when I can’t deal with canon, or when I don’t have the emotional energy to untangle all the emotions I have for what’s going on in canon. Alternative universes, the safe harbor for us. Below are a mix of rewrites of canon, remixes of canon, or out right not even set in Roswell- to fill every type distance you want from canon- from near to far.

and the howl of the desert carries me home by @christchex​/ @michaels-blackhat​ (4,334) Alex runs into the desert to escape from his father with his guitar clutched to his chest. He plans to spend one last night playing before his father destroys it. Instead, he meets a cute boy with flowers in his curly hair and a lizard on his shoulder. He exchanges a song for a smile.

why i like it: I love everything about this story. Michael is totally a disney princess, and what a lovely way to save him from foster homes, but have him run away to the desert and use his alien powers to build his own little protective world. Looping in Nora’s plant powers like that, giving Michael a little animal friend, I love it all, but the show stealer is Alex Manes, playing music to coax the mystery boy out. It’s just incredibly soft.

***

Heartbeat series by @adiwriting ​ (133,000 - in progress) During the lost decade, Alex gets Michael pregnant and Michael doesn't see or hear from him again for the next four and a half years. When Alex comes back to town, he discovers he has a daughter with Michael and they all have to figure out how to be a family.

why i like it: it has it all, installments with angst, installments with fluff, I can find whatever mood I am in by just pouring over this incredible series. I really don’t even like mpreg, but in RNM, with aliens it seems a little more probable to me and bless Britt, she goes light on the details but heavy on the kid aspect of it. I absolutely love Alex in this story, he’s richly characterized as a man who is trying hard while wandering unfamiliar territory like aliens, like being a dad, like being Michael’s boyfriend, and he doesn’t always get it right, but he’s loved regardless.

***

tonight we are young @skinsharpenedteeth (8,137) Alex and Michael ditch the Evans' New Years Eve party to find their own fun and Alex gets his New Years kiss...(the underage tag is because they're both 17 in this.)

why i like it: I’m a sucker for teen!Malex, especially stories that take place before the shed. I love this little AU where Alex is thinking about making a move, but hasn’t yet. They are both adorable nervous babies, this feels very much how a softer teen!Malex first time would go. Perfectly characterized here, you can just feel the hopeful vibes they have at 17. I like to believe nothing bad ever happens to them again.

***

you shift on a gear (it’s been a long year) by @backinmybodymp3 (28, 362) “Good morning,” Michael says. “What the hell did you do?” Alex asks, exasperated. (or: There were times, in some of the lower moments of the past however-many-days it’s been, where Michael had thought about what it might’ve been like to share this time loop with someone. He never imagined— well, he never imagined it’d be Alex.)

why i like it: I love time-loop stories! And this is just superb. The friendship dynamics of everyone involved, the Liz/Max wedding, Michael being a good brother, Michael trying so hard to keep this bullshit from dragging Alex in and then Alex being his usual reckless self when it comes to Michael, I absolutely dig this canon-divergent au. you can feel how much the author cares about everyone on the show in this story, and they really nail the Malex dynamic. This story came along just as season 3 did and it’s a true antidote to the malex drought on screen.

***

the library by @arielana (9,657)  Alex had stopped too far away to hear exactly what they were saying, but their voices did carry over to where he was standing. The guy’s drawl had a melody to it that was vaguely familiar, but much deeper than the voice it reminded Alex of. God, that and the hair really brought some memories back.  Just as Alex told himself to stop secretly staring like a creep and walk over there, he turned slightly so that Alex got a glimpse of the side of his face.  Fuck!  Fuck, fuck, fuck! Twelve years ago Alex left Roswell to join the Air Force, nursing a broken heart and promising to never return. When work brings him back to New Mexico he runs into someone he’d been sure he’d never see again.

why i like it: the first kiss in the UFO emporium was groundbreaking, but I have to admit, I love stories that explore the almost-happened, where Malex reconnect as adults without the shadow of Jesse’s attack. I love how sharp Alex is in this story, he has all these walls as an adult built from that first rejection, but then he’s so completely unprepared to reconnect with Michael again. The clownery in this story by both of them is perfect! I also totally love Forrest as a gay best friend for Alex, trying to wingman Alex, that cracked me up.

***

stellar light based life by @jocarthage (30,651) It’s not a memory if it’s something you see every day. It’s a trigger and it’s not one Alex wants to ever let go of.Alex saw Michael disappear into a blinding blue light, soft 17-year-old body pulled back into some kind of impossible vortex -- one hand, outstretched.

why i like it: another submission from 2020 RNM Big Bang, this story just wrecked me. I can’t even really put into words about how it hooked me and basically lives in my head now to the point I often mumble the first line to myself. Anyway, this AU takes a right turn at the shed attack, and goes full force scifi and tragic separation, I love it. In so many ways it reshapes Alex’s life but the core of who he is never changes, there’s so many great science geekery details about Michael’s planet and the astronaut journey that Alex takes, plus SANDERS... anyway, this is a fandom classic for me.

***

Crossed Wires by @beautifulcheat, @ladynox (15,351) Michael's been kicked off more than one Starfleet posting. So when he learned he was reassigned to the USS Roswell, he decided that he would keep his head down and behave. This decision is immediately thwarted when he meets her hot Vulcan captain.This might be the first time Michael got kicked off a posting for flirting with a captain.

why i like it: Star Trek AU? I’m pretty easy. Seeing elements of Kirk and Spock’s tragic backstory blended into genius mechanic Michael Guerin and ice prince Alex Manes was amazing. I love how it’s serving with his family that brings Michael to the Enterprise, his bond with Max and Isobel was chef’s kiss good. The blend of Michael’s powers and Alex’s biology - I loved the balance even if it came with its own misunderstandings, but hey, this time it was cultural! lol

***

I’m still here by @vague-shadows @pippsmcgee  (35,928) Treasure Planet AU in which Michael is the gifted young delinquent who found a treasure map, and Alex is a space pirate pawn in his Father's obsession with riches and legacy.

why i like it: I’ve never seen Treasure Planet, but I didn’t need to thoroughly enjoy this AU. This was the perfect mix of angst and sci-fi adventure, where the authors managed to make the shed even more horrifying. Jesse Manes is the absolute worst in this story, the levels of obsession he goes to find a treasure, and then Michael on his own collision course - the ability to write tense action is a gift, and it’s on display in this story. Cyborg!Alex took up a place in my heart and still lives there, where he only gets the nicest things.

If you like any of these recs, please leave a comment on the story or a kudo- a  ‘this was awesome’ is enough to propel an author into the stratosphere with happiness, so don’t worry about coming up with a unique, never before shared insight- sometimes a keyboard smash and emoji makes all  the difference!

[jdmorganz]

I've read some people have been horribly racist towards Negan's new wife. As a fan, I support Negan being in a new relationship with someone regardless of their race, I mean that honestly shouldn't matter at all. What I do have a problem with is the lack of chemistry between the two. Jeff and Hilarie are obviously married so you would hope that chemistry would translate to the screen, lol and it sure did...they were incredible together! Here's Negan did such a great job at showing us Negan's backstory while introducing us to the great love of his life.

And while I don't necessarily want him and Maggie together, in the scenes they've shared (some with little to no dialogue) their chemistry is just undeniable. Hell, he's had better chemistry with Michonne in the short scenes they had together, not that I ship them either. Annie though? I got more of a vibe of them being associates. Kind of how I love seeing Daryl work alongside Rosita but in terms of a relationship, I would hope it would be Daryl/Connie (Caryl Shippers please don't come for me lol).

I love Negan and his redemption arc has been one of my favorite things to watch. I've been hoping for him to be in a relationship for so long and was kind of expecting it in a spin-off. With Annie, it's just like ok :/ Those short scenes of them standing near each other, talking, "we live here" I didn't get the vibe that they were in love at all.

I also don't like that their relationship took place off camera. Everything feels so rushed tbh. I can only imagine this is all leading up to something tragic since we really don't have much time left on this show. Anyway, I hope you understand where I'm coming from and I'm not trying to knock you or anyone else who likes Negan and Annie, it's just my opinion.

Let me see if I can hit up all of this. Yes, there were some incredibly racist comments made about Negan being with Annie. I know not everyone is like that, but I do agree with my friend that stated previously on here that if she were white people would probably be more accepting of it. I've seen a lot of people wishing her and the baby's death and I don't know it does seem exceedingly racist at times.

As far as lacking chemistry, one, it's the pandemic. And it was heavy into the pandemic still. With Hilarie and Jeff, they were married. So of course they were able to kiss up on each other. Hold each other. Cuddle, etc. And obviously, they had incredible chemistry. Annie and Negan had two episodes. Barely any screen time together in the first episode and in the second, it was rare they were in the same scenes again. I don't think you're going to see them kissing up on each other (I could be wrong) due to the fact that covid is still around (probably more back when they were filming this) and Jeff has two babies at home. The pandemic really put a stunt on the romanticizing of characters on tv shows. So of course we aren't going to get that bond or chemistry that Jeff had with Hilarie. Covid is likely going to put a stop to it. Technically Daryl and Leah had the same thing.

Now also, let's put into consideration, I'm fairly certain that Annie is just being used a plot device to "settle" things between Negan and Maggie. Oh Maggie lost her husband. Oh well Negan lost his wife and his baby, which I'm praying to God they don't do, but I'm fairly certain that's where they are going because they are locked in to punishing Negan to the highest amounts and making him suffer. So if this woman is being used a plot device, of course they aren't going to focus on their relationship because people are going to ultimately get mad. I'm already furious at the idea of them using Annie as Negan's man pain. She's a bad ass. She's a woman of color and she's pregnant. If they kill her off just to further Negan and Maggie, I'm going to be furious.

Do I understand that people see chemistry between Negan and Maggie, sure. I know people like that kind of storyline. But I'm more someone who likes the idea of Negan being happy. All Negan and Maggie are ever going to be is toxic. I personally hate the idea of all the time they have been having Negan around Maggie. The more time Negan is around Maggie, the more likely he is to die. As a Negan fan, I'd kind of like to keep him around longer.

But yeah, as far as the whole lack of chemistry thing...I blame Covid. Because Jeff is selling the fuck out of Negan liking Annie. Unfortunately the show is ending and they didn't have time to give us their backstory. Which, I wish they did, but sadly we don't.

With Negan and Annie, they didn't want you to know they were a couple because they wanted it to be a SHOCKER. It was supposed to be *gasp* Negan is married. If he was all kissing up on her, people wouldn't have been surprised. I think they were trying to make it a shock moment as well. If that makes sense.

[phoebehalliwell]

on the subject of crackships.

in a prue lives, phoebeleo piperkyle pruecole paigeandy au (in which paige meets them in s1) how do u see it playing out and ALSO. do u see them all having kids still. this is so random i am so sorry (also i don't mean they have to be set from the get go and never get w anyone else but these would hypothetically be endgame)

i mean with phoebeleo like hard yes like in s2 when they're watching the baby at the end everyone's like phoebe ik you're gonna be a great mom you're gonna have like a million and one kids like mark my words and phoebe's real smitten about it like wow u really think you : ) i'd like to. guess i should probably find a guy first tho huh. but if that guy's already there bc it's leo and he's been here since season one i think they are easily first to have kids and first to get a full power of three the other three is definitely like another can of worms bc like.

okay so for paigeandy obvi we're starting andy's an old childhood friend of the halliwell's for the sake of cleanliness did not date any of them (if we're going messy tho dated prue hooked up once or twice with phoebe (not while dating prue, but neither of them ever mentioned it around prue bc well. yikes.) And piper had a major crush on andy for like. a decade. from ages 13 to 23) and he's a cop and does. stuff idk helps people and this lands him frequently in bed with social services which is. consistently. a pain in the ass. and he doesn't try to hold it against them bc they're clearly understaffed underpaid there's a lot to do but um jesus. and everyone in the precinct Hates having to go over there to do stuff bc you're just standing in the lobby drinking bad coffee for fifty minutes before you can even get a word in with the work and unlucky andy he drew the short straw ends up at social services and who should he meet there if not this gorgeous but really scatterbrained berkeley grad with a mouth like a sailor and a heart of gold and now um there's no need to draw straws at the station because andy straight up volunteers to go to social services just to see paige which she notices of course because like. were you jinxed or something? cursed? i've never known someone to draw the short straw so many times. and andy's like no i just um. like being hands on with my work i don't like leaving up to some dumb rookie with bad luck and paige is like oh don't worry i promise it is still being left to some dumb rookie with bad luck i mean i am right here blah blah blah banter conversation hint at a tragic backstory give it half a season and then it's official bf/gf shit and as far as charmed goes it's a prophecy about four sisters and the halliwells are like phew. dodged a bullet there lmao. until they do something only charmed ones could do and they're like Wait. Fuck. Is There A Fourth Sister Out There? so they find paige within the first hmm ten episodes or so.

so since we have both s1 phoebeleo and paigeandy i'd say they'd be on the fastest track but i feel like paige does have a lot more issues when it comes to getting married and having kids than phoebe does regardless i think by s4 they're married on track to have kids with pruecole we're doing the s3 introduction and the enemies to lovers arc we seal that with either a wedding at the very end of s4 or at the very beginning of s5 however kids is like. like they both want kids but prue has daddy issues and cole has mommy issues not to mention the charmed one/demon hybrid so they need to do some soul searching on that one. prue's probably pregnant by the end of s5 and has her baby halfway thru s6. paige may or may not have had kids at this point if they did they were kind of a whoopsies baby but she and andy r embracing it with open arms.

piperkyle imo is peak in a divorce/widower era it's been pitched like piperkyle au where he's not fucking insane piperkyle au where she's not brokenhearted piperkyle au where they're both normal happy people who then meet but like. nah. the appeal of them to me really is being the broken fucked up human being and feeling like you're kinda just gonna stay broken and fucked up bc you had your shot and you blew it so now you're here get used to it and then to have someone to meet someone who sees you so genuinely as you are that at first it's disgusting leave me alone i hate you but out of that just honest sight grows familiarity and comfort and before you even realized it happened love and jfc i'm in love with them???? but you realize that you're always happier when they're around you want to stay by their side and you don't even have to wonder if they feel the same because you just know they do because you Know each other and you don't have to wait for them to turn and run once they see who you really are because they know who you are they've known from the start saw the ugly the broken and vile and looked past that and saw the beauty and genuine love underneath like 🗣‼🗣‼🗣‼🗣‼. piperkyle consistently makes me insane. So. in order to hit this. we're bringing in dan. that's right, from season two to six (maybe just five but i'd like to have the pruecole arc wrapped up in a nice bow by the time we open up the next enemies to lovers) piper and dan give a relationship the old college try going from the honeymoon phase to the cringe failmarriage stage until it's eventually just time to call it quits like you literally can't move forward. so because of the delayed start piperkyle would def be the last to have kids but because this is a long slowburn full of character development and just like. vulnerable bonding moments i think that once they go official as a couple wedding and kids are not far off on the horizon i think if we close out a season (a hypothetical 9 or 10) with them getting together for the first time then we gotta burn some miles on the freak out denial stage because i always think that's funny that'll last half a season? maybe a third. and then by the end of the season we're looking at a wedding. by the end of the following season they def have a kid

superlatives!

most fashionable couple: pruecole

most likely to name their kids after dead relatives: piperkyle

most likely to break p tradition: paigeandy

most chill about dating a charmed one: phoebeleo (andy kyle & cole would all be way too willing to throw themselves into danger, leo trusts phoebe's foresight and knows when he needs to sit on the sidelines. it is a lesson all the other men still struggle with)

bonus round!

best bromance: 1st place: leoandy 2nd place: leocole 3rd place: colekyle

[jostepherjoestar]

I remember someone suggesting about the La Squadra child being Abbacchio or Mista’s nephew/niece and I was wondering if it’s ok to ask how would (I’m gonna go with Abbacchio) react to that?. Maybe before joining the kid was just a above average intelligent child but was still normal and now Abbacchio is confused as to why their stoic, cold and with a group of assassins.

La Squadra Kid backstory and relation to Abbacchio + general HC’s

Thank you so much for asking this, I’ve been meaning to summarise their backstory and how they ended up with La Squadra! This will be kind of emotional since it’s bit tragic imo. There’s also going to be some HC’s about our little bud so you can all get a feel at how I see them 😊

Long post!

CW: heavier subjects such as trauma, not fun situations for a kid to be in and usual gang related violence, mentions of abortion and mental illness

General HC’s

I’ve always imagined them to be around 7 to 8 years old, but unfortunately due to all that’s happened, their mind has been forced to mature a lot faster. Of course they should have never had to go through that but life isn’t that simple, especially for them.

Their name is Pomo, like an apple or a pommel :) thought it was a fitting and cute name! I’ll still refer to them as La Squadra Kid in titles but opt for Pomo while writing.

Pomo is not that tall for their age, just cute lil bean with puffy cheeks! I’ve decided to keep Pomo’s pronouns neutral, it just seemed to click more.

As far as their personality goes it’s been fun discovering them through your asks! Pomo is a quiet and stoic kid, they don’t smile that often but that doesn’t mean they’re not enjoying themselves.

They love drawing things as a way to express their feelings or the things they like. It’s a lot easier than verbally communicating for them. They’ll say what they need with the least amount of words necessary.

They’ve developed a weird sense of humour, very dry I’d say lol, also thinks it’s funny to scare Ghiaccio, who they know secretly likes them.

Pomo is quite independent and goes out by themselves, their stand is very powerful and kinda scary, even to their colleagues so they can handle any trouble coming their way. Pomo is slowly learning that they don’t need to do everything alone (i.e. asking for company after nightmares)

Though going out alone can result in people turning Pomo away in shops, that’s why Melone is their choice to bring along so it’s not weird a kid is just out alone spending money.

They’re also very glad to do tasks or things the others ask of them, they crave harmony and peace at home so Pomo will try to help achieve that in any way possible (unfortunately this is a result of trauma).

Pomo really likes La Squadra and sees them as their family now, knowing what member is better at offering different types of things and who to turn to for specific needs.

Their stand’s is named My Way (マイウェイ) after the Frank Sinatra song. It fits quite nicely imo, a force to be reckoned with doing it on their own terms.

And lastly, they do not like hugs or being touched that much. They’ll allow hand holding but only if they’re in a good mood, quick head pats are also ok. It really is touch and go with them, Pomo will let you know when they don’t like something.

Backstory and relation to Abbacchio

The world moved in a blur, the two lines on every single pregnancy test strewn out before her like nails getting hammered into her coffin. Suffocating while it was lowered into the ground, scratching and screaming for air, nails bloodied and raw as the reality set in that she was unmistakably pregnant. The panic followed, clenching her chest like a vice, threatening to shatter her heart and lungs in the process, gasping for air and wishing any other truth than this one. Abbacchio’s older sister wept for days, dark circles alternating with red swollen puffiness as the life she’d just started on her own already began to crumble.

The father of her child taking his exit as soon as she confessed her situation, knowing before she’d even tell him that he’d swiftly let her suffer in the mess. The thought of looking a doctor in the eyes, the cruel conversations she would have to endure before they’d let her suffer in uncertainty of the fate of her unborn child, making her choose to just endure it instead. Not that the choice would offer a softer outcome, it was her burden to bare, she thought. Whatever horrible things she’s done to receive such heartless judgement never occurred to her. The only thing the young woman was convinced of, is that she whole heartedly deserved it.

Her younger brother, growing up to be an impressionable adolescent, unsure how to care for his beloved sibling. His eyes always so full of innocent wonderment at his older sister, wanting to become as brave and independent as her. Living alone, working strenuous hours as if only this would make him worthy of the meagre salary of a rookie police officer. Slowly but surely he saw the woman he so admired creep away as her belly grew larger each month. Coming by often to check up on her wellbeing after school, spending nights or even weeks so he’d be by her side. All the while finishing up in high school. As his sister’s expression grew darker, the smiles fading and her laughter but a distant memory Leone Abbacchio could do nothing but stand by and let her lean on him.

The meagre support their parents could offer did little too ease her mind, the reality of becoming a mother and having nothing but emptiness to offer her child digging her ever deeper into the darkness that consumed her. She sobbed the day her child was born, little Pomo’s big eyes asking her if she was even worthy to hold the small babe. Every look at the child reminding her she had already failed, not even able to comfort their cries before feedings. Incapable of shushing them and finding the strength to coo at those tiny hands that ached to play and accept the warm touch of a caregiver. The young mother did what she needed, feeding the child and changing diapers. The depth of her troubles never easing as she had to go back to work, two different jobs needed to support herself and Pomo.

Abbacchio offered what he could, often babysitting and spending weekends at his sister’s cramped apartment. A child taking care of an even smaller one. The hope he held that his sister would regain her previous lust for life faltered. It only seemed to worsen as Pomo grew. The child never overtly fussed or cried, sleeping soundly and cooing gently whenever hungry. Those big eyes always seeming to bore straight through whoever leaned over the basinet to admire them. The child’s mother wished for it all to end, every night she’d pray to any god who would hear her desperate calls. But as she did only further hurting herself, her pleading like whips claiming penitence on her heavy shoulders.

She begged her younger brother to go out and make his dreams come true. “Never let your resolve falter Leone. Ever.” The voice that brought him courage, the broken woman’s words reminding him of the image he so admired once. But in pursuing his career as an officer it would mean less and less time to care for his dwindling sister and her child.

The night she told him the sisters of their local convent would relieve her of her child, the young officer held his sister for hours. The tears they cried filling an endless well of sorrow. It hadn’t brought the relief she thought she would feel, not a feather lighter as her child would be in more capable hands. Caregivers who weren’t afraid to look the toddler in the eyes as they searched your very soul for meaning. At merely four years old dear Pomo lay gently asleep in a different cot, in a stony building smelling of earth, heated by creaky copper pipes while sisters prayed in unison with beaded necklaces intertwining their palms. Praying for deliverance.

Abbacchio came by whenever he could, becoming more and more weary of his actions and the people he swore to protect as his career started to lack the fervour it had when he started out. Seeing Pomo grow into a silent and demure child, laconically learning to read and write, quietly pleading the sisters not to let their touch on their skin linger. Every stroke burning with an unknown memory that someone once held them, just once and decided to never do it again. Their very skin warding off any unwanted contact without even knowing why. A locked memory with a firm grasp on their being.

“Never let your resolve falter, Pomo. Ever.” The last words spoken to the small child before leaving. The lonely child left in the suffocating confines of the convent. Their uncle wouldn’t return for a long time, days spent hoping to see a sliver of his stark hair and bright eyes that had seemed to dull over time. But the child would never forget those words. Not even as the head sister punished them for not answering when spoken to, not when she would order them to remain on the prayer bench for hours as punishment, knees aching to settle as they were forced to remain. Their eyes boring through the other sisters as they came and joined them at their usual hours of worship.

Restraining the stand they were born with from acting out, self control being trained as they kept going, determined to let their uncle’s last words not be wasted on them. In the free time Pomo was allowed, they’d test out whatever the ghostly figure could, standing taller than them with thick black fog-like tentacles resting behind their back. Whatever those touched seemed to shrivel up like roses in wintertime. Pomo was intelligent, interested in more subjects than just his schooling that only seemed to bore them. The ease of the material offering no challenge as they completed tests with full marks, only making the head sister grow suspicious of them and unleashing more punishment.

Men in extravagant suits would visit the convent every so often, hushed whispers as they walked by the child who’d stoically stare as they passed. They’d always ignore them, scared of the glare and aura the child had started emitting. Many of the sisters had rejected the offer to tutor them when the previous one excused herself, feeling too uneasy by Pomo’s being. It didn’t hurt them, they just kept on doing what the sisters asked of them. Stay tidy, study and don’t get in their way. They had accepted their silence and aversion to touch, growing scared to try anything after the entire courtyard greenery was found shrivelled and dead mid spring. Every freshly planted flower grey and sad, the grass as crunchy as if it had just been burned to ashes. Pomo was sat comfortably on the stone bench that was placed there to admire the garden’s beauty. It wasn’t that they wanted it to happen. Someone just came too close and made them panic, not that it was clear to the sister that accidentally grabbed their shoulders while moving past them, the child remained calm, instead letting their stand take care of the burning sensation that crept over their body.

It was one of those days where a well dressed man would come by and whisper secretively with the sisters as they strode towards a private room and remained there until it was time to leave in an equal hurry. But this time a relaxed gentleman stepped out of the room with a large huff, stretching his neck and groaning loudly as he did. The taps of his heeled shiny shoes echoed through the stony arches of the hallway that led to the courtyard where Pomo had been toying a blade of grass between their fingers. Intensely staring at the green colour that stained his pads while their stand loomed over them freely. As the steps drew nearer, the child paid them no mind, instead grabbing a new blade and continuing the process all over. Soft padded steps made their way over casually until a large shadow covered Pomo. Hands rested in his pocked while his arms pushed back the sides of the loose suit jacket. The cigarette dangling from his lips bobbing after he took another intoxicating drag, puffing out the air harshly while peering at the kid.

“And who might you two be?” The man sunk down to a crouch, inspecting a small daisy that stuck out between the sea of green blades. “Pomo.” The child stopped rolling the tuft of grass as they processed his words. Two. Never had they met another who could see the figure that was their only friend. Unsure if the man posed a threat, he exuded a certain cocky confidence they weren’t sure they liked. “Nice to meet you Pomo. That other one looks a bit scary, don’t you think? But then again, you must be too. D’you mind showing me what they can do?” Offering a gentle chuckle as he gently pried, curious to see what this lonesome child could do, never having witnessed someone so young possessing a stand. It sure peaked the man’s interest as he twirled the daisy between his digits.

The amount of precision they possessed shocked him as the daisy was shot with a quick tap of a foggy black tentacle. It crumbled under his pads as he pressed it, letting it fall back onto the earth. Impressed by the ability and thoroughly interested in what it could do for him, the man proceeded. “Have you even killed someone with that?” There was no need to beat around the bush, that much was obvious when the child never seemed to have moved from their position, merely staring at the ground before them. A slow methodical dark tendril crept towards the man, stopping an inch before his polished shoe. Pomo turned their gaze upwards now, offering a look so unreadably neutral it made the man’s heart beat faster in fear, his many years in Passione not having prepared him to face another that lacked fear as much as the child in front of him. “Do you like it here, Pomo?”

A proposal started taking form in the man’s head, one he’d have to discus with his boss before acting on it. “No.” Clear as a bell their voice made a sinister hope grow, a hope that it would only take as little as just asking them to join up with Passione to get his desired answer. As an Advisor he’d have little hurdles in his way before bringing up the idea to his boss, being one of the only few allowed to even directly communicate with the mysterious man. “You seem fearless, to an unsettling degree, kid. If I asked you to kill a guy, would you?” Somehow the direct communication had been the most pleasant conversation Pomo has had in a few years, be it of a morally ambiguous subject, but refreshing to have another respect their space and not be afraid to ask what they desired of them.

“Are they bad?” The amount of troubling honesty behind the child’s harsh gaze making the man believe he’d met his fate, it had been like Pomo was asking if he deserved to live another moment, their stand still remaining at the tip of his shoe. “Not in their own opinion.” Clearing his throat to regain any sort of confidence, the kid’s eyes skipping through the pages of his soul, weighing his sins and good deeds. In reality they were doing no such thing, only weighing their options, grown tired of the convent and its inhabitants, aching to find any sort of family or support without even knowing it. “Ok.” As they gave their answer they chose to retract their stand, ending the conversation without another word. The Advisor’s sigh of relief deeper than any he had before, glad to be able to continue living.

The Boss was feeling generous, letting his Advisor know that placing the child amongst the men of La Squadra Esecuzioni could serve them well, perhaps make them regain any semblance of respect in the organisation. Opting out of putting their deadly stand in his personal Unità Speciale, fearing the effects of Cioccolata or Secco would build a threat larger than himself. Pomo agreed immediately, knowing it would be best to leave the sisters behind to pray for the child’s deliverance. Making their own money, be it a scanty salary, living with a group of other misfits and taking care of jobs here and there did not sound like the worst future for them. The sisters, terrified at the transfer, having no clue what the mafia would even want with the child, did not let the only person on the outside that cared for them know about the move. Too afraid of the consequences.

But after joining with Bucciarati, Abbacchio held great shame, afraid to face his sister’s child with those eyes that understood too much at such a young age. Fearing any visit would involve them with the tricky business he got entangled in, the little one becoming a distant and painful memory. If only he knew.

Further events take place after part 5 where everyone survives and La Squadra works under Don Giovanna. At Risotto’s request Pomo was left out of the fights regarding Trish and the Bucci gang.

While out with Melone to buy some more markers, Abbacchio felt like he’d seen a ghost. The familiar figure of his sister’s child standing next to a Passione assassin Bruno had fought not that long ago while he excitedly pointed out stuffed animals through the toyshop’s window. “Pomo?” Abbacchio had crept closer, carefully assessing if it were smart to approach. Melone had turned before Pomo could, eyeing the familiar gangster before him. “What do you need with Pomo?” Melone’s features hardened into a scowl while searching for their hand. All Pomo could do was stare up at their uncle they hadn’t seen in what felt like forever.

“What’s going on, is everything alright Pomo?” That deep voice reminding them of when he last visited, the voice that told them to never let their resolve falter, ever. “First of all, answer my question. What do you want with them?” Melone stepped forward, never one to initiate conflicts but needing an explanation as to why Leone Abbacchio knew their teammate that had explicitly never been in contact with his side of Passione. “That’s my sister’s kid. Step down you idiot. I’m not here to start shit. Now answer me; what are they doing with you?” Abbacchio growled back at the lithe man, searching Pomo’s eyes for an answer. “Pomo is part of our team. Been so for almost a year now.” He calmed down as he remembered all the fond memories they’d made together, even after the horrible fights with the other gangster’s team.

The amount of shock and confusion Abbacchio felt was immeasurable. After many “what”’s and “how”’s Melone calmly explained that Pomo had quite the powerful stand and still wanted to be part of their squad. “We ask every once in a while if they still want this. Never said no so far.” Melone practically beamed, the other man still trying to process the explanation. Pomo quickly understood their uncle’s position as well, clearly another member of Passione as they connected the dots. That small kid has never hurt anyone -that he knew of- and now they’re an assassin already in possession of a stand? What the actual fuck. His knees began to feel weak, looking for support as he slid down the toyshop’s windowsill. “I’m sorry.” Hands scrambling at his scalp while he stared at the ground, despair filling every inch of his being. Another person he cared about thrown into the complicated landscape of Passione.

The little one reached out their hand at the man that had meant so much to them, one of the only ones to ever offer the child any semblance of a connection. Until Pomo met their new family. A soft pat on the uncle’s platinum strands, grazing the man’s overworked hands. Melone felt his intrusion, staring off into the crowd as he kept some distance, sure to be within ample reach; should anything happen.

Abbacchio had grown so much, learned that his life was worth living. Following his sisters’s advice to strengthen his resolve and to never let it falter like he did before joining Passione. But this one memory, this one being of the past had made its way back. The child he so lovingly took care of and the pain he felt to have left them behind crashing through him as he sat there. Remembering his capo’s words, his kindness and that look of care and understanding making him reach up to the little hand. Memories of them fussing over touches reminding him a hug wasn’t possible. As his eyes met Pomo’s, the ones that always understood the ones they looked in but never let you know what was being kept behind their own. “I’m sorry for leaving you.” He uttered, the small hand getting enveloped in his bigger ones, begging them for forgiveness. “I’ve missed you.” the child spoke, their expression ever unchanging as Abbacchio felt tears flood his eyes and spill onto his cheeks. The purple haired man that had been following along from a distance couldn’t help but blink away his feelings, pitying the small one.

“Never let your resolve falter.” Pomo repeated. The words they’d clung to, any semblance of purpose all pinned on the only advice they’ve ever received. “Ever.” Abbacchio replied, squeezing the small hand between his before wiping away the tears, his actions were forgiven but not forgotten. “Are you ready, kid?” Melone stepped back into reach, offering a hand to the man he’d called an enemy not too long ago, helping him up. A quick nod from the child, a sliver of relief finally being felt, their uncle was still safe and alive. “You know where to find us. Don’t hesitate to come.” Waving goodbye as they entered the store, Melone offering as much assurance he could muster for his now-colleague. But mostly in awe of the child’s strength, they really were something else, huh.

[spartanguard]

partners

summary: SVU detective Emma Swan's new partner is not what she expected. Thankfully, that's a good thing.

A/n: So I've been watching a LOT of Law & Order: SVU lately and when I got to the episodes where Stabler was partnered with Dani Beck, it just smacked with CS feels. This is just a bit of exploration of that, in honor of @optomisticgirl​ ‘s birthday!!

B—HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! Thank you for being the most amazing friend, and the best person to bounce crazy fic ideas off of (like this). I hope you have the most amazing day and I love you!!!!

Note: While there isn't any actual sexual violence in this story, it is an SVU AU, so it's mentioned.

rated T | 2.3k words | AO3

She met him while he was trying to arrest a perp who’d just walked.

“Are you Detective Swan?” he’d asked, and she immediately noticed his accent—the way it wrapped around her last name in a way that sent a shiver down her spine, but it was hard to tell if it was in a good way or not.

“Yeah, that’s me,” she tossed back.

“I’m your new partner. Killian Jones.”

She shook his offered hand (only later noticing he only had the one) and wondered—just what the hell were they about to get into?

[He was her second new partner in as many weeks. Graham, who she’d worked with since she joined the unit, had enough with special victims—with Boston in general—and had taken up some smalltown sheriff gig in Maine. Emma knew he’d be happier there, but it kind of left her in the lurch. They’d sent someone new over the week before, but her style didn’t gel with Mulan’s quite well enough—the woman was a damn fine detective but just...too different.]

Jones was new to special victims, transferring in on the recommendation of the captain at his previous precinct, where he’d worked in homicide. The dead victims, he was used to; the live ones—not so much.

It was pretty obvious on their first case together, when they were interviewing the young girl in the hospital. Emma—she’d seen enough of the world’s shitty side that little phazed her any more; growing up in the foster system made her uniquely suited to this line of work.

But Killian? He was visibly upset; she had to physically restrain him from running out of the hospital to start tracking down the culprit, holding him back by the sleeve of his leather jacket. They hardly had a lead on this. Something could be said for enthusiasm, but that didn’t excuse jumping ahead of themselves. That’s how you got into trouble—that was how criminals got away with murder (literally); she’d done that enough for the both of them, and had a feeling he had, too.

She felt they had a lot in common, actually; there was an obvious affinity for leather coats, but past that, there was something familiar in his eyes. Not that she’d met him before, or anything—just something in the determined set of his gaze when interviewing a suspect, in the empathetic way he handled the victim.

She still wasn’t sure if that was good or not, especially when he almost forgot protocol—almost lost them evidence—by rushing in too soon.

And she was half ready to walk into Captain Mills’ office to request a new partner (again) when she found him asleep at his desk with what could only be described as a murderboard spread out behind him. He looked younger and softer in his sleep, impossibly gorgeous with the way his long lashes rested on his cheekbones and gentle breaths from his full lips—and none of that was really pertinent, because the man had just researched his way to a solved case.

“Just who are you, Killian Jones?” she asked when she later woke him up with coffee and a bear claw (biting back a comment on the rumpled state of his usually pristine waistcoat-and-dress shirt combo).

“Wouldn’t you like to know,” he drawled, holding her gaze intently before taking a long pull from his cup.

She knew she shouldn’t, but damn, did she.

It wasn’t until a couple cases later that she began to put together the pieces of him. It had been a doozy of a kidnapping, and he’d been on edge the whole time—right until they finally tracked down the little boy who’d been abducted. Emma slapped the cuffs on the miserable excuse for a father who’d taken him and Killian pulled the boy into his arms, visibly deflating once he knew he was safe.

She dragged him to their unit’s favorite bar that night and slid a glass of rum in front of him, along with the directive to “Talk.”

He downed it in one shot, then worried his bottom lip (much to Emma’s distraction) before saying, “Have I mentioned I have a daughter?”

Her eyebrows rose in surprise, but she let him explain without interruption. Her name was Alice; she was 8. He had sole custody, and with good reason: her mother, his ex-girlfriend, had kidnapped her from his apartment when she was only a few years old. “It’s the most scared I’ve ever been,” he confessed. “And today...it’s like I was right back in that moment.”

“I don’t blame you,” she replied, then finished her own whiskey. This was probably where she should drop some of her own tragic backstory, right? Like the scumbag who left her pregnant at 17, and the baby boy she put up for adoption? “Props to you for doing it on your own. I obviously couldn't.”

“Don’t beat yourself up, love; you gave him his best chance.” He gently set his hand over hers on the bar and she froze; not because he was cold—quite the opposite, actually—but between that tiny gesture of support and the understanding in those too-blue eyes, she felt more seen than she had by anyone in ages, even Graham.

It was suddenly too much, too intimate, and she yanked her hand away and ordered another drink. “Is your ex the name on your tattoo?” she asked, trying to put some space in between them (physically and emotionally).

It worked. He sat back up and tugged his right sleeve down with his prosthesis, hiding the ink, and she could almost see the walls go back up between them. “No. That’s...another story. For another time.” He stood and tossed some cash on the counter. “Alice is with my neighbor; I better go get her. See you ‘round.” And he left hastily.

It was what she wanted to happen. He’d suddenly gotten too close. So why did she feel like such an ass about it?

She was going to apologize at their next shift, but they got thrown into another case. And then another after it. It was a different kind of intense—a different kind of intimate—than that moment in the bar; very quickly, she had to trust him, and vice versa. That was something neither were predisposed to, but were managing to do...honestly, better than she had with anyone.

After putting another rapist behind bars, Killian said with a smirk, “I don’t mean to upset you, Swan, but I think we make quite the team.” And he winked (well, tried to), and she just blushed back, like she was a teenager in love all over again. That fact that would normally send her running but, for the first time in years, she wasn’t opposed to it—except for, y’know, the fact that he was her partner and they were coworkers and HR generally looked down on that kind of thing.

She doubted he was interested, anyway. They hadn’t really done anything outside of work since that night; he was always quick to get home to Alice, and she didn’t fault him that—especially when she finally met the kid, who was clearly her father’s daughter in all the best ways.

They got a call for a case late one weeknight; Emma easily beat him to the scene, since he had to make sure his neighbor could watch Alice at such an ungodly hour. She handed him a coffee when he got there and they made their way to the ME, to get the rundown on the vic. 

Emma had been paying attention, but it shifted from the examiner to Killian pretty quickly; he stiffened at the description of what had been done to the victim, then when white as the sheet covering her when it was pulled back.

“Eloise,” he whispered, like he’d seen a ghost.

“Wait—as in…?”

He nodded. “Aye. Alice’s mum.”

“Shit.”

They got what little information they could from the scene and then started to head for the precinct, but he was shaking so much, she insisted on driving.

“Are you gonna be alright?” she asked.

He let out a hollow chuckle. “No, probably not.” Then, one long breath later, “It was Gold.”

She nearly missed their turn at that. “Gold? As in, the mysterious Mr. Gold, owner of the pawn store chain?”

“One and the same,” Killian said, scrubbing a hand down his face. “It’s the same as with Milah.”

She would have asked who that was, but he was resting his prosthesis over the spot on his arm where she knew the tattoo was. And she got a sinking feeling in her stomach that this was going to be a rough case.

Once they got to the office (and she got some more coffee in him), Killian explained: Milah was his ex, his first love—but also Gold’s wife. And while Gold was well-known for being a shady individual, no one had ever been able to pin anything on him.

But Gold did find out about their affair, and Killian came home one day to find Milah—dead, attacked and killed in the same way Eloise had been hours ago. He wasn’t sure what their connection was—and he didn’t think Gold knew about his to Eloise, especially since she’d only been released from jail last week—“But I know it’s him. And I’m going to prove it this time.”

(Apparently, last time had ended with him getting into an altercation with one of Gold’s lackeys. He escaped with his life, but not with his left hand.)

Milah’s case had gone cold, but given the similarities, they were able to pull the files. It took a few weeks—several late nights, more than a few breakdowns, many tears (mostly Killian’s, but Emma’s and Alice’s as well) before they finally—finally—had the evidence to pin both murders on Gold.

Tracking him down was another thing altogether, but they finally caught up with him in his penthouse apartment. To no one’s surprise, he didn’t go willingly; a fistfight broke out between he and Killian. 

She was scared she’d have to intervene, knowing how personal it was. By the end of it, Killian had a black eye and a bloody lip, but Gold was in handcuffs, tossed unceremoniously in the back of a squad car. 

Killian watched the vehicle pull away, then turned to Emma, and wrapped his arms around her in a bruising hug. 

In any other situation, she would have gone stiff with shock, but she didn’t hesitate to lean right into him. Her desire to comfort him after that was just as strong as his need for comfort. 

But then he pulled back, cupped her cheek, and pressed his lips to hers. 

That did take her by surprise. 

But she was equally quick to reciprocate. 

Just as fast, it was over and he was walking away, leaving her utterly confused. Logically, she knew it was probably just an emotional reaction—a one-time thing. 

However: he kissed her like he meant it. She was familiar with empty kisses and single-night flings—and that...was a whole lot more. 

And she couldn’t deny it any longer: she wanted that more. 

She arrived at the precinct early the next morning, hoping to beat him there so they could talk about whatever that had been. She’d even gotten up an hour before she usually did so she could get them good coffee. But he was already there, filling out forms at his desk. 

“Hey,” she said, suddenly feeling incredibly awkward as she put the cup on his desk. “You taking care of the reports?”

“Um, yeah,” he stammered, pointedly focusing on the paperwork and not her. 

She glanced down at the desk, and that wasn’t a report—that was a transfer form. “You want to leave?” she whispered, the familiar pain of betrayal washing over her. He didn’t want to be her partner anymore? 

“Emma, I can’t stay here,” he said, only somewhat apologetic. (Also, though she didn’t realize it at the moment, it was the first time he’d used her given name.) “After this last case...it just wouldn’t be good form.”

“Fuck your good form, Jones!” she cried. “How can you say that, after everything these past few months? After last night?”

Calmly, he stood up and moved into her space. “I can’t be your partner any more, Emma,” he said, reaching up to brush her hair behind her ear. “Because I want to be more than that. And last I checked, Captain Mills frowned upon inter-unit relations.”

That was true; she really did, more than most. But then the reality of what Killian was saying hit: “You...you’d give up your position for me?”

“Aye,” he answered, simply, like it wasn’t the heaviest thing anyone had ever told her. 

What else was she supposed to do after a confession like that but kiss him? She rose up on her toes, gripped the lapels of his waistcoat, and found his lips with hers. He didn’t hesitate to pull her close and she was exceedingly glad no one else was in the squad room, because she’d never quite been kissed so closely to within an inch of her life as she’d been then.

(Also, it was a good thing no one was around when he pushed her onto his desk to deepen it further. If Captain Mills later noticed the forms were a bit crumpled, she didn’t say anything.) 

Killian ended up transferring back to his old precinct, old job. It turned out they missed him. Emma knew exactly why; her next partner, David, was great, but no match. 

Good thing she got to go home to Killian—and Alice—every night. 

----------------------------------------

thanks for reading, and send B all the birthday love! tagging some others:

@kat2609​ @thesschesthair​  @xpumpkindumplingx​ t @cocohook38​ @annytecture​ @shireness-says​ @ohmightydevviepuu​ @profdanglaisstuff​ @wingedlioness​ @word-bug​ @thisonesatellite​ @distant-rose​ @wellhellotragic​ @welllpthisishappening​ @let-it-raines​ @pirateherokillian​ @its-imperator-furiosa​ @fergus80​ @thejollyroger-writer​ @ineffablecolors​ @laschatzi​ @ive-always-been-a-pirate​  @stubblesandwich​​ @phiralovesloki​ @athenascarlet​ @kmomof4​ @ilovemesomekillianjones​ @whimsicallyenchantedrose​ @snowbellewells​ @idristardis​ @scientificapricot​ @searchingwardrobes​ @donteattheappleshook​