#she is probably the person I'll forgive last in this situation if ever

[katyspersonal]

Lrb dear god, this reminded me of that time when Alfred-chan got sooooo mad at my post explaining why fans should respect bisexual headcanons for Maria and Malenia instead of pretending like they're canonically lesbians and that they get oppressed and erased by mxf ships with them. They kept vagueing that post for like a MONTH in their blog including in tags under reblogs of Maria fanart, passively-aggressively changed their url to character+sexuality to "spite" me and then even made a sockpuppet account to start shit with me in the comments.

They deactivated when me and Val completely obliterated their "you cultivate lesbiphobic following by telling people why they should respect all sexuality headcanons instead of acting cultish or assuming their experiences and stereotypes equal canon confirmation" garbage with actual facts and logic tho but I screenshotted everything fjthfgfj (I learned to document everything the hard way after they've changed the she/they pronouns to they/they pronouns ONLY to accuse me of misgendering, so thank you for making me wiser I guess 😎). Even more vile, as they, a white person, larped as an Arab in that sockpuppet to hold even MORE "privilege" against me in discussion gjtjfh Because for them race, gender or sexuality are just badges of honor and dishonor, they don't see these as traits of actual human beings. And Dr Eugene X, who worked with them and weaponized her race to accuse everyone who disagreed with her of racism, didn't bat an eye at such a terrible act too?? As usual, rules are not for their friends, lol

It is not even the worst thing Alfred did, and yet all of this just, just, JUST because I wrote a point on why bisexual headcanon people did nothing wrong and there is no ground to claim something is canon when it isn't. 🤦‍♂️ Like, they were soooo convinced that I hated lesbian headcanons and that I'd feel angry if they called Lady Maria a lesbian, when what I was angry at is this exact toxic behavior in the fandom. No matter how much you like a headcanon, don't be a bitch about it. Maria doesn't """belong""" to any gender or sexuality, she belongs to anyone who likes her and is invested in her complexity as a character!!!

Yet, apparently, common Malenia simps / Finlay shippers are no better than common Maria simps / Mariadeline shippers. Just, wild how after shit like this, many people have the guts to claim that it is "sexist redditbros" who are the biggest problem of creators in the fandom. 🤦‍♂️ They'd actually blush if they encountered what such self-proclaimed "feminists" do to their own (!!!) over headcanons. 🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️

[mj0702]

For @tasha95 ... I hope it meets your expectations 😅 I got a little carried away 😅😅

“Bitsy I love you... I REALLY love you but this is ridiculous” Keira said one evening after training as you two were driving back to her home

“What?” you said absently as you looked up from your phone

“The situation between you and Ona” the blonde clarified

“There is no situation” you grumbled getting back on your phone

“There is... I don't know what happened and you know I'll never push you to tell me but I have eyes and the way Ona always looks over at you and you avoiding her like the pest is a dead give away that there is a situation” Keira said as she stopped at a red light

“There is no situation” you answered

“Bitsy” the blonde said softly

“I let a fan comment get the better of me and said some.. not so nice things” you mumbled

“What did the fan said that YOU of all people let it get to you?” Keira asked her hand finding your knee to calm you down

“They asked me if Lucy and Ona where a thing since Lstans wedding or before... you know.. back in Manchester” you mumbled getting even more ashamed

“Oh Bitsy... you started to overthink didn't you?” the blonde sighed

“Yeah... I called them hypocrites” you said looking down on your hands

“Why?” Keira asked confused

“Lucy was so upset about G and I and I really thought they started before....” you left the rest of the sentence open

“... you thought Lucy cheated on me with Ona?” Keira said confused and shocked

“Kinda... yeah” you mumbled

“And that would make Ona a hypocrite how?” the blonde started do push the answer out of you a little bit

“Don't know.... I was just so mad” you said honestly

“I DO understand where you're coming from Bits... and you know I'm always in your corner but you probably hurt Ona.. I know you didn't have it easy in the past but you need to suck it up and apologize” Keira said seriously her hand still on your knee squeezing it lightly

“I know.... I REALLY know... I just don't know HOW” you said your voice a little desperate

“Ona is very forgiving you know... pull her aside and apologize – a real honest apology and I can promise you she'll forget about it” the blonde smiled encouraging “... but you hurt her”

“I know... I feel very bad about it” you mumbled embarrassed

“Good.. you are an amazing person Bitsy – just show Ona” Keira smiled as she pulled into the driveway

That was one week ago. You still haven't apologized. Simply due to the fact that every time you talked some courage into yourself and you were on the way towards Ona to finally apologize someone called her, talked to her or swept her away for some media. So you retorted to you last resort which brought you to the current situation – slumped down against Lucys front door waiting for the familiar black Cupra to pull up. You were waiting now for two hours now and there was still no one in sight. Your phone nearly dead from all the texting with your girlfriend you were down to count the pedals of the roses in the small front yard. Finally there was a car coming down the street and you got some hope that it was Lucy but you soon realized that it wasn't. So you kept on waiting – you told Keira where you were so she wouldn't freak out but right now you wished for nothing more than someone familiar next to you. The sun began to set about 20 minutes ago and it started to get dark really quickly. You were tired – so so tired. Since you were back in Barcelona – and after you kind of worked through your trauma about your ACL and the realisation that you'll never ever play professional football again – you started to kick the ball around more often. Mostly with Mapí, Pina and Patri who never said a single word about how broken you looked. Even tho the three took it lightly with you it costed you a lot of Energy to keep up with them. The first time they saw you again when Lucy brought you back from Munich, your girlfriend right next to you not letting you out of her sight for a single second – they where shocked but never ever said a word about it and just accepted everything you were willing to give freely.

So you pulled the Barcelona Jacket you got from Alexia - in a small moment between the two of you – tighter around you and got a little more “comfortable” against the door. You didn't plan to fall asleep but eventually you did. That's how Lucy and Ona found you about one and a half hours later when they finally made their way home – having stopped for some dinner spontaneously on the way and then taking a little walk at the beach.

“Bubs? Hey Bubs” Lucy said softly and started to shake you lightly so she wouldn't startle you

“Hm??” you grunted lowly not really waking up

“Come on Bubs... it's getting cold here... let's get you inside” your sister said lovingly as she picked you up like you weight nothing

“Can't... need to wait for Ona.... need to pologize” you mumbled still three quarter asleep not realizing that Ona was right next to Lucy

“It's okay Bubs” Lucy mumbled into your hair holding you tightly against her while Ona unlocked the door “You can apologise tomorrow”

“No...” you whined as you drifted off to sleep again “... trying for a week now... always someone stealing her”

“She'll be right here when you wake up Bubs” your sister said as she carefully laid you down on “your” bed before leaving the room letting the door a small bit open so you wouldn't feel trapped if you'd wake up later

“She doesn't need to apologise” Ona said immediately as Lucy came back into the living room “I know she didn't mean it”

“She needs to... for her own sake... I saw how she tried the whole week to try and come over to talk to you” Lucy said as she opened a bottle of wine since they had a day off tomorrow

“When?” Ona asked confused not noticing how you struggled to find a way to talk to her “I kept an eye on her but every time I looked she was either deep in conversation or with the Trio of Trouble”

“Mhm...” your sister confirmed while passing a glass to her girlfriend “... and every time she looked over you were either in conversation or got stolen away for media – it drove me crazy to watch the two of you looking past each other for a week”

“Why didn't you say anything?” the spaniard said confused

“Not my place....” Lucy shrugged her shoulders “... that's something between her and you”

“Morning” you mumbled once you dragged yourself into the kitchen

“Bon dia Bebita” Ona said softly reaching you a cup of coffee

“I want to apologise” you mumbled lowly after you took a small sip of coffee

“No need Bebita...” the blonde started but you interrupted her immediately

“... yes need... what I did and say wasn't okay... not at all... Lucy and Keira always told me not to listen to fans or media... I don't know why this comment got to me the way it did.... maybe because Lucy was so... shitty about G and I... I don't know... but you had nothing to do with it... I'm sorry Ona... I'm sorry I pulled you into the shit I made up in my head” you said honestly but you couldn't bring yourself to look into her eyes

“Look at me...” Ona said firmly and you thought you really fucked up and your mind started to go a million miles an hour about how you just destroyed either the relationship between Lucy and Ona or even worse for you – the relationship between your sister and you

“... Bebita... I really appreciate your apology – I do...” the spaniard started softly “... but there is no need. I know how certain comments can hurt – especially if they're made to get a reaction out of you... and I followed some pages online and not one of them posted anything about Lucys and mine relationship other than the usual – so you didn't let that comment get to you until you were out of the situation and that's worth more than every apology... at least to me... you didn't comment on it you left and you didn't bring Lucy or I in a situation where we had to think about a plan to do “damage control”... you showed me that you accept me and our relationship... and that's the biggest gift you could give me”

[tsukimefuku]

Let me die

I've been obsessed with a bit for a fic I want to write, so I just decided to put it here. Nanami fluff and some angst ahead, be careful.

Disclaimer: NO ONE DIES, it’s just a conversation in a bar where y/n requests something.

This is part of my "Jujutsu Partners Canon Divergence AU". A sequence of short stories and random drabbles for a fic I'll eventually write (eventually). To see the ever-growing list of one-shots, please visit my masterlist :) 

Disclaimer: they’re NOT written and posted in chronological order of events. To see where this story fits in the timeline, please check the masterlist mentioned above.

You had just finished a mission that left a pretty bad taste in your mouth. You were forced to choose between two people to save, and one of them was your friend. Was.

The glare she had as she embraced her beloved's dead body made you sure that she would never forgive you for saving her instead of him. You chose to save her for egotistical reasons, you knew that. You knew (or thought you knew) that his death would not weigh on your shoulders as much hers would. However, you just didn't account in your egotistical equation how much his death would weigh on her, and how much more suffering you bestowed upon her by choosing to let him die in exchange for her life.

"Nanami, I need to drink." you said on the phone. "I had a horrible day. I'd like some company."

"We can meet at the bar by your house at 7PM." He promptly replied.

You and Nanami had grown close during the course of the last few months. He was assigned to you as your informal mentor until you were promoted from a grade 2 to a grade 1 sorcerer. There was some history before you went to work for Jujutsu High. Both of you met when he was on a mission that led to him eventually saving your life, and your gratitude eventually started to become something more. Sometimes, you wondered if he felt as close to you as you felt to him. These night drinks were turning into a regular thing, and you usually let your mouth say things you couldn't think to say out loud if it weren't for a few beers in, and Nanami being the person you were talking to.

***

After a while, when you spend so much time around somebody, you tend to pick up on their mannerisms, like their brows frowning, the way their mouths twitch when they feel mad, or how they are dead silent because they're drowning in unsaid things.

"What is it?" Nanami asked, out of the blue, surprising you. Both had already been drinking for a while, and you specifically were 4 beers down in misery. "I can hear your thinking from the other side of the table."

“I have a request for you.” You answered.

He took another sip of his drink, and said, unfazed, "What request?"

He inquired like he already knew you wanted to ask something from him, even before you knew you would.

"If you’re ever faced with a situation where you have to choose between saving my life or someone else, don’t choose me." you said. Nanami lifted his gaze to meet yours, and seemed surprised.

You continued. "Please, don’t make me live with the fact that me being alive is because someone died in my place and I had no choice over that. Don’t assign me that guilt.”

It would be something harsh to say to anybody, but you knew Nanami. You knew him well enough to be sure he'd not take that as an accusation of sorts. That's why you chose to tell him this kind of "if this ever happens" desire before telling anybody else. Shoko would probably chastise you for such a request, given you were prone to overthinking and martyrdom, and Gojo would never listen to that in the first place, simply doing whatever he felt like.

Nanami went silent for a while, mulling over what you asked him to do. Different from you, someone that had a little trouble controlling your emotions and how they impact your words and actions, Nanami was the man that you used to call in your head as nerves of steel. You had never seen him lose his composure. Ever.

He started talking, his face lightly flushed from alcohol. “There are two sides for this. You assume I’d be willing to live with the guilt of not saving you when I could have done so."

You were not expecting that answer. He was the most dutiful sorcerer you had ever met — hell, he was the most dutiful person you knew. If there was one thing Nanami was known for, it was not letting his emotions interfere with his judgement when making a decision. You never thought he could ever feel guilty if you died in a situation where you gave him permission to let you die.

"You'd feel guilty?" You questioned.

"Yes." He replied. "Your request would make me live with a guilt I don’t want, either."

"My request of letting me die, with my authorization, to save somebody else?" You inquired.

"Yes." He replied, looking down on his glass.

You were both silent for a moment.

"I can't accept your request, because you’re assigning me your guilt just as much." He took another sip from his now almost empty glass of whiskey. "I don't think I could bring myself to let you die, even if you asked me to.”

That pulled on your heart strings. Hard. You were instantly flooded with all the memories of the time you two spent together working, or simply chatting like this. All the times you had a silent but deep understanding of each other. Could he be...?

"I never pegged you for someone with any dose of egoism of not letting someone go when they'd rather die." You responded.

"Not letting you die." He answered. His answer made you fluster, ever so slightly, and you reclined yourself in your chair, trying to hide your face in the bar's dark ambiance.

“Would you ever curse me for that?” You asked. "Curse me for dying to save somebody else?"

“No, I wouldn't.” He replied. "That's who you are, and that is something about you that I respect, even if I don't understand it."

You chuckled softly, trying not to get too emotional. The alcohol was not helping. “Well, I might just have to curse you, then.” you responded, smiling.

“To curse me for saving you, you'd have to be alive.” He bottomed his drink. "I can live with that.”

[soaps-mohawk]

Oh my gawd WHY IS IT STILL SO PAINFULLL. This chapter was still so sad to read. 'mega clearly didn't want to watch the whole thing or kill him(even if the freak deserves it(coming back after the hiatus was quite the contrast after spending months fixated on that stupid Texas bastard)) like Simon himself said way before the kidnapping that she's not a soldier, she hasn't been condition to live with that pain and guilt, AND THE LACK OF COMFORT OH MY GOD. It's something I noticed from the start of the fic that always gave this air of things never being quite ideal but it takes center stage now(even if mega is still now willing to forgive them, rightfully so) is the way they don't notice the small things?? Especially now when they're realizing how little they knew about poor 'mega. Johnny nudging her inside despite not wanting to, the hovering John's insistence on doing everything himself. Like even when they finally took her out to the sea this unwillingness to be truthful. Especially in this chapter when 'mega finally said outright that she doesn't like surprises and they'd known if they would have paid attention. like yeah it's small things BUT THOSE THINGS ADD UP, AND JUST MAKE THE SITUATION EVEN MORE PAINFUL(like John not even telling her why they brought her there until the last moment like JESUS. That was a red flag for me.) but the Convo with Dr. Keller and the set up that 'mega will finally confront them about this GOT ME SO HYPED. The girl deserves to shed those pushover habits, it's probably the most frustrating part of reading this series personally as someone who's also putting a lot of effort into unlearning them. What an emotional banger, that I've been obsessed with for like 2 months now. I even made a playlist for it, combining vocaloid, video game music and Tchaikovsky so here that if you're interested

https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLdvKg781XoUfaZkGXLmqVLsbj4UD2y-C6&si=Z8iLaV--w0-nTVQv

(also will we ever get a bad ending au where the bond does break..? I know it wouldn't happen soon with everything in the world rn and the angst marathon that we had before the rewrites.. but I'm still a sucker for guilt angst. Things turning out to be unrepairable, the 141 left to live with a hole in their heart, and 'mega trying to move on without them.)

Things really have been tense in the fic, huh? You're so right though, the whole fic has kind of revolved around the idea that things really aren't ideal and all of them were kind of forced into this situation without any chance to really get to know each other first. Even the 141 had to learn about each other on the fly. There's a lot they don't know, especially about 'mega. They haven't really been paying attention, relying on 'mega to kind of adjust and be the one to tell them everything instead of learning themselves. Which we know babygirl isn't going to just outright say something, or at least she wasn't going to at first. Now...now things have changed a bit. I'll say that much.

I'm so going to listen to that playlist! I love when people make playlists omg I've never had that done before this fic.

I don't think I'd ever write out the full angst-filled version where things don't turn out as ideal. I do have an idea for how it would play out, but I'm not sure I could actually write it.

[a-star-that-burns-brightly]

CH2-14 Thoughts

So! CH2-14, huh? This episode has been our longest in the series yet, and it has used that time incredibly efficiently, especially given it is the penultimate episode before our culprit reveal. I don't think there's much to start with, really. Let's jump right into it :D

SWEAR STATISTICS (ch2-13)

BINGO CARD

Nico

DT-Dev needs to stop drawing Nico so handsome when they're in the middle of killing someone. this has happened twice now, I am very concerned.

Nico is probably the character I have the least to say about overall, but I still think it's fair to start with them. For one, we finally got the reveal of Nico's true murder plan! I...still personally do not understand why they didn't just garrote the man from the beginning, but it's nice to finally have some answers. Nico confessing to not trusting anyone in the killing game as well as their whole speech later on is honestly very based, if I was in their shoes I'd probably not see the point in pretending to be guilty either, and I really do think it was the most mature way to respond to this situation as a whole. Nico is probably one of the more logically-driven in the cast (when Ace isn't up their ass, anyway), so it makes a lot of sense to me that this is the conclusion they'd come to.

(x) Nico: I… I just can't stand being treated like that. My teachers, my classmates, my father… I don't ever want to relive what they did to me.

Furthermore, we also learned that their father was also in on the abuse and transphobia they received, and this combined with how Levi talked about his father in the previous episode, it's just daddy issues across the board huh? Guess DT-Dev had to make up for J's mom angst somehow lmao. But in all seriousness, the fact that Nico more than likely had no one be there for them during those times is probably part of why they drifted more towards animals, besides the fact that there's no social rules with animals. (...has anyone put alien blues by vundabar on a nico playlist? I'm getting sidetracked.)

There is also a lot I could say about Nico's predominant male figure subjecting them to such treatment and how that relates to their relationship with Ace and Ace in general, but I'll leave that for a future post. All I'll say for right now is to look up VeryWellMind's page on toxic masculinity and observe how many points relate back to Ace :3

(x) Nico: I don't expect you to forgive me. Very few people ever do. So I don't see the point in acting sorry.

The last thing I really want to mention when it comes to Nico is this line, specifically the bolded text, because... am I wrong to think this is a very strange thing to say in the context of talking about your attempted murder? I've seen people say that this could be in reference to Nico's blunt way of speaking, but I feel like that doesn't fit in with this context, and the wording itself feels too dramatic for that to be the case. I feel like Nico has resorted to violence against their bullies before. I don't think it ever got as severe as the situation with Ace, but if only a few days of abuse caused Nico to choose violence, I think its almost a guarantee that they resorted to violence a few times during the years they were abused by their peers. Would certainly explain those weird ass bandages around their upper arms. anyway Nico, I adore you very much despite your bullshit murder plan. can't wait to see where you go :) (also is it fair to say that the theories of literally anyone else committing Ace's attempted murder are de-confirmed now? Like I don't think you could get a greater confirmation than the first thirteen minutes of this episode lmao)

Hu

...Oh yikes. So I have defended Hu on a few occasions, talking about how she is just defending Nico and that her behavior towards them is completely normal. And I think I must take advantage of my minimal gag reflex and gulp down that L because lord have fucking mercy.

First and foremost

(x) Hu: You’re trying to paint them as the villain just because they lost their temper at Ace once!

(x) Hu: If Arei died of a stab wound, it would be wrong for me to say you did it.

Both of these lines were fucking crazy of her lmao. Absolutely nonsensical, she is so annoying /affectionate

Second and secondmost, Hu so clearly projecting her own emotions and feelings onto Nico so that they can look weak and small and thus have to rely on her and clinging onto that perception when it continues to falter is so fucking delicious. The way I worded that makes it seem like I think Hu is being malicious, I do not, but also that is literally what she is doing, and furthermore it is not working. This episode alone brought Hu in my mind to a high-c tier, to a high b-tier because there is nothing I love more in this world than fictional women being awful. And now that I have that all typed out, I can't help but realize that this sounds very familiar...

Oh! That's right!

...Man Hu, I get that it's across the color wheel, but you really like to foil with people in red. Yeah, I think that Acevi and Huco are meant to be parallels of each other relationship wise. Both of them feature someone (Ace and Hu) projecting a certain identity onto a stranger (Levi and Nico) to satisfy their own emotional needs and their reactions when those fantasies crumble beneath them. The dynamic between Ace and Hu is so delicious to me and I think should be explored more in the fandom. Not just because they somehow manage to give divorced spouses vibes despite one of the two being gay, but because I think the way that they foil, how they are different in contrast with how they're similar in typical DRDT fashion, adds so much to both of their characters and their relationships with the others. And I'm also glad that I at least have two more, count-em two, more parallels between Nico and Levi. I will keep spreading my Levco agenda until the day I die.

Okay but, though I've kind of been taking the piss out of Hu during this section, I do actually feel very bad for her. Especially if Eden is the culprit, because Hu and Eden have shown to be close on multiple occasions, and I could not imagine witnessing the gruesome execution of someone you love after pretty much dealing with two betrayals back-to-back. And I guess since we're here I should clarify that I do not think Hu, or anyone else except the two suspects we land on in this episode, are responsible for Arei's murder. Third Party Theory seems to hinge entirely on the idea that someone other than Nico attempted to kill Ace, and as I've said before I don't think that's the case. And given the fact that we have at least 40 minutes left of the overall case, I can't really see a way from a writer's perspective to throw in such a major final twist with an entirely different character without it feeling rushed. I'm sure DT-Dev could pull it off, but just on concept, not sure how it could work and also if Eden really is the culprit, Hu is 1000% going to try and take her place as the optimistic mood-lifter, and I need to see that outside of my imagination

There isn't much else for me to add, really, part from the fact that I am very excited to see how Hu's character progresses and how her relationships with the cast progress. ... ...hey can we count Hu and Nico as toxic yur--

Ace

Funny thing, I originally was not going to give Ace his own section in this post. But I decided I would anyhow for two reasons 1. Ace is a very fun character to analyze And 2. I get to once again talk about how much of a fucking liar this man is lmao

(x) Ace: Who’s gonna stick up for me, huh? No one. Because I have a spine and I don’t need other people to lie to me constantly to keep me happy.

[Pictured: Doesn't need other people to lie to him constantly to keep him happy]

(x) Nico: What else should I say? Ace: W— "What else should I say"?? Ace: You tried to murder me. You fucking tried to murder me! And after all's said and done, you can't even say something as simple as "sorry"?!

I love this jockey the best when he is gaslighting himself. We obviously know that Ace does, in fact, need people to lie to him to keep him happy. And I don't just mean that in the context of Levi and Nico. Ace has a very antagonized view of everyone in the cast

(x) Ace: -but now they apparently also have a fucking defense brigade to shield them from even having to think about the fact that they're a murderer.

the only person defending them was Hu

And that view of his classmates, to me anyway, is very intentionally cultivated by Ace himself. He is very aware that how he's behaving is wrong, and he is clearly not happy about it

(x) Ace: You think I act like this for fun, and then I go to bed and sleep soundly at night, you dumb piece of shit?

Ace doesn't like the fact that he is being rude to otherwise innocent people, but at the same time, he knows that any of these innocent people could stab him in the back without a second thought, like Levi. So Ace demonizes the cast in his head so that he can emotionally distance himself from them, and as such, will feel less bad about treating them like shit. As a certain indie game that had its nine year anniversary once said: The more you distance yourself, the less you will hurt. The more easily you can bring yourself to hurt others.

Ace does need people to lie to him to keep him happy. Which brings me to his role in this whole scene with Nico which just- I love. So much.

It is so, so funny to me that Ace is putting this pressure on Nico to give an apology. And why is that? Ace treats both Nico and Levi in pretty much the same way, incredibly volatile even more so than the rest of the cast. And that makes a lot of sense given his relationship with both characters and how both of them have threatened his safety. But there is one key difference between his interactions with both of these people

(x) Levi: Ace, I already said— Ace: "Sorry" won't cut it. You know that's just a word you say, right? You think that saying two syllables is going to make me forget how you acted yesterday at that trial?

(x) Ace: You tried to murder me. You fucking tried to murder me! And after all's said and done, you can't even say something as simple as "sorry"?!

With Levi, he repeatedly denies and mocks his apologies. With Nico, it's almost like Ace wants them to apologize to him. But why is that? Ace certainly cares less about what Nico thinks compared to Levi, so why does he necessarily care whether or not Nico apologizes to him? You could say it's because the severity of what both of these people did to Ace, but to me personally? I think Ace just wants this all to end. Nico's murder attempt on him, the scar it left him, it was the perfect kick in the ribs to everything Ace had become since the events of Chapter 1. It confirmed to him that not only was his fear that everyone is out to get him, that he's going to be next after Xander and Min, completely justified to have. But also that his efforts to appear tough and threatening to prevent that fear from becoming reality were not only null, but thrown right back in his face.

(x) Ace: You know… Heh. I've always wondered which is worse, dying young or living a long shitty life of suffering. But it turns out neither of those options are as bad as this.

He is currently at his lowest possible point. At this point, the least that he wants is for Nico to provide him with some form of closure, so that he can put that moment where his guts were spilled on the floor to rest. But Nico isn't providing him that closure, they refuse to. And with Ace now being suspected for Arei's murder, regardless of if he survives this chapter or dies with it, I think he is finally going to break down. That hidden quote of his is fast approaching. I already know.

Rose

Rose is a character that, though I love dearly and believe she is one of the most strongly written of Despair Time's cast which is saying a lot, always somehow manages to fade into the background for me. But this episode bringing her to the forefront and giving us some extra character development from her is something I loved a lot.

For one, her clear and open betrayal towards Nico's actions was very upsetting to me, especially when you take into account that Nico asking Rose to teach them how to paint was probably the first time Rose has ever been asked to paint something for someone without a contract involved. I can imagine the idea of it must've been a breath of fresh air for her, and for it to only result in another red string in Nico's murder plan had to have been crushing.

But what's possibly even more crushing is her monologue after David gets frustrated with her, because...

(x) Rose: I know I'm supposed to remember everything. I know I'm supposed to be smart. I know I'm supposed to be helpful. Rose: Yet I'm not. Rose: I… I'm sorry for being useless. Maybe if I tried harder, if I just got over myself—

Wow this woman really does see herself as a commodity that only exists to be used by other people, doesn't she?

Something I've always appreciated about Rose's character is how it commentates on the subject of big corporations seeing art as content instead of something that was the product of someone pouring their heart and soul into a canvas. And how that mindset kills the desire for artists to create. And it is so fascinating seeing how that mindset reflects how Rose sees herself as a person.

She's one of the few characters in the cast that I can never really get a read on when it comes to where her character arc could be going, but I am very excited to see where DT-Dev takes her, even more-so with this development.

Teruko

I am like, 9999% sure this sprite is the first time she has smiled throughout this entire chapter. I am so happy for her.

Teruko, as always, stays being Best Girl™, and I absolutely adore the development given to her as well. Her realizing that her attempts to over-correct by isolating herself and not receiving help from anyone not only resulted in her getting hurt, but those around her getting hurt as well. And the fact that that's what leads her to coming to this conclusion really goes to show that, despite everything, she cares about these dumbfucks so much. And this is only taken further by her decision to trust Eden despite (HOW I INTERPRET IT) already knowing that Eden is a more likely culprit than Ace. She is choosing to trust her, regardless of if she'll regret it. And I honestly think that, regardless if Eden is the culprit or not, regardless if Teruko backslides, I think the fact that she got the courage to trust Eden at all is going to stick with her. I don't really have much else to say, really. Uhh... Teruko and Rose were kinda fruity this episode, I dunno.

David

[Sighs] This man provides us with a new headache every single episode and I love/hate him so much for it. So like...basically everyone else who watched this episode, I was confused as fuck watching whatever the hell David was pulling for the last 18 minutes of the episode. But now that I have time to think about it, I think I have a pretty stable idea. So, let's get into it.

Firstly

(x) David: Because I'm actually the first person to see the body.

Now, most people are immediately brushing this off as David lying to fuck things up again. But I think that a lot of people are forgetting two things 1. David is not a compulsive liar. He doesn't just tell lies for no/little reason behind them. The lies that he tells all have reasoning and inner logic to support them. 2. There really isn't any evidence suggesting that he couldn't had seen Arei's corpse before everyone else.

So though this point is mostly speculation, I think that David is telling the truth (sorry if this seems like an asspull, there is literally five more hours until the next episode comes out I need to speed things up)

But that's not really what I want to talk about in this section anyway, it's everything that comes after this that I want to talk about.

(x) David: All I want is for Teruko to distrust others.

...So. I think David is lying off his ass when he says that this is why he is doing this. And my reasoning for why I think that is pretty simple... Why would he care?

Like, yeah given the fact that David more than likely has Teruko's secret, he has every right to suspect that she might be affiliated with the death game, and also probably wants her dead. But...what does that have to do with Teruko's distrust in others? Not much. I think this sentence is David lying about why he is doing this to keep his true intentions underwraps. But what are those true intentions?

I can answer that pretty easily as well. David's whole argument in this part of the episode is the idea that Eden is not exempt from being the culprit. He suspects that she is the one behind Arei's murder, and I don't think that's helped by the seed planted in his head by Arei that even Eden must be responsible for the harm of someone. And well...I think we know how exactly David feels about the culprit behind Arei's murder

(x) David: Ahaha. It's just so foolish. David: For someone to take advantage of Arei like that… David: It's absolutely unforgivable. All she wanted was to change. David: What a reprehensible person this killer is. I look forward to seeing their painful execution.

And that leads me to what I think David is truly trying to do here: I think he is trying to get Eden voted for.

That is why he wants Teruko to believe him, and is using her trust issues against her to do so. He's seen the first trial, he saw how Teruko was able to convict Min as the culprit and convince the others to vote for her too. He wants her to do the same thing again, but for Eden. Really, it's a win-win for him. If Eden is the culprit like he suspects, then he gets to witness the unforgivable culprit get their just deserts. If Eden isn't the culprit, then everyone ends up getting executed. Which is, y'know, that other thing he really wants.

That's my personal theory on what David was trying to do here. It's not perfect, but it'll do for now. I love you, Mr. David Chiem. Please keep being confusing.

Eden

...So yeah, if you've been paying any attention to this post, I do still think Eden is the culprit. I also think during the scene with her and Teruko she is very desperate and wants to live and as a result, may have sipped a small tiny bit of the manipulation juice. But I will get to that in a bit First of all though, I absolutely loved the scene with Teruko and Eden. There is something about all of their scenes that just resonates with me in a way I can't describe, and this one is no different. The way it is shot, with the half-and-half and then the closeup on both of their expressions, and the fucking HUG CG? Luucarii and Zel both did an amazing job bringing the scene to life with their voices, and the choice to use the same OST as the kitchen scene in CH2-3 was fucking evil, especially because of what I'm about to say. All around, a fantastically orchestrated and emotional scene, I would expect no less from DT-Dev and their team.

But now it's time to talk Eden!Culprit. This is not something I should have to clarify if you aren't stupid, but I think before I really go into it I should say that I do not think Eden is an inherently malicious character, and I think she feels horrible for what she has possibly done. I also think she wants to live, like every bundle of pixels masquerading as a human. She can feel guilt for her actions and also indulge in a bit of gaslight gatekeep girlbossing. Min already proved that those two things can be simultaneous. With that out of the way... I do think that Eden is slightly manipulating Teruko here. And there is a very big reason why I think that is because of something @thebadjoe pointed out in their theory post

(x) Eden: Teruko, relationships aren't transactional. It's not that I did something good for you that you should do something good for me.

[11 episodes later]

(x) Eden: Please, Teruko… You’re my friend, aren’t you? Eden: Friends help each other…. So please, help me…

...Eden? Darling? I thought you said that relationships weren't transactional. You can't simply change your principles because they're getting closer to the truth. Putting the fact that Teruko never even considered her a friend to begin with on the shelf for right now, these two lines from Eden directly go against each other. Saying that relationships aren't transactional, and then saying that Teruko should help her because she's her friend. I think Eden knows that she is basically backed into a corner. There is no evidence suggesting that she couldn't had done it, and David is turning the tide in a way that is leading others to begin suspecting her. And just as Arei said...

(x) Arei: -you're pathetic and weak, and you always need to rely on others to get by.

Eden's is too overcome with emotion to defend herself properly, so she comes to Teruko to defend her for her. And when Teruko initially refuses, she becomes desperate. Using their relationship so that Teruko will believe her and trust her.

I don't think Eden wants to do this, but I don't think she knows what else to do, and is terrified and just wants this trial to be over. Even if it means treating her and Teruko's relationship like it's transactional. And Teruko, ultimately, gives into this idea.

(x) Teruko: Don’t… get me wrong. This isn’t out of kindness or pity or anything else. This is only because you helped me in the last trial.

(teruko is most likely simplifying her thought-process, I think she does genuinely care for eden and wants to trust her. But the idea of relationships as transactions isn't one inherently new to her, so I do think this is partially the truth.)

And I think the fact that Teruko does agree to help Eden is why Eden goes in for the hug. This is where we take that point of "Teruko never agreed to be friends with Eden" off the shelf

Eden knows that Teruko is choosing to not be her friend, despite considering Teruko as a friend. But I think in this moment, Eden thinks that Teruko finally considers her as a friend, someone she is willing to extend her hand to. And even if this day is her final one, I think Eden will appreciate forever.

Extra Thoughts !! - TERUKO SAID IT!! SHE SAID THE WORD!! THE T WORD!! I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR THAT FROM HER!! another one to cross off the bingo card babyyyy - that aside, as always the voice work for this episode was fucking phenomenal. I already mentioned Luucarii and Zel's performances, but Swords and Arakachi did amazingly too. Such an amazing frosting on top of the already great storytelling.

(x) Eden: Arei is… She could have been my friend! Why would I kill her??

- maybe I'm reading too deep into it, but I honestly think this is the closest we've gotten to direct confirmation that Eden thought Arei was full of shit when she said she wanted to change. Like...she literally corrects herself. Why the fuck did she correct herself. - this isn't something I usually compliment, but the music-choice in this episode was amazing as well. Every song chosen suited the situation and the rising tension, and all of them were fucking bops. - I also adored the new sprites, as I always do. Especially Nico's

Predictions for CH2-15 - I'll be honest and say I have none. At least other than the obvious, that being that there's 100% gonna be an Ace VS Eden scrum debate.

Conclusion

This episode was a fantastic way to lead into what will probably be the last episode of the trial. I cannot wait to see what's cooking come CH2-15, which is in... [looks at my conveniently placed watch] THREE HOURS?! WHAT THE FU-

UPDATED SWEAR STATISTICS CH2-14

UPDATED BINGO CARD

[isabelawritesthings]

The Lost Potential of Quinn Fabray's Sexuality on Glee: An analysis

(I personally don't know if people still talk about Glee in 2024 considering the fact that this series ended more than eight years ago but watching it for the first time and reading some posts here on Tumblr I was intrigued by the lack of exploration of Quinn's sexuality in Glee, and I decided to do an analysis about this lost potential and what I would change in her story.)

When it comes to saying that Quinn could very well be a lesbian or even bisexual, many argue that Quinn is the most straight character in the entire glee club, the highly Christian "Miss Perfect" who ended up getting pregnant by her boyfriend's best friend and cheating on every guy she dated, but saying that she is romantically and sexually active with men doesn't mean that she is totally straight (I mean, Santana dated Puck, Sam and slept with Finn, yet came out as a lesbian in season three) Brittany was also a fan of sex with men but ended up marrying a woman, and it's not as if many lesbians and gays in real life hadn't dated someone of the opposite sex before discovering their sexual and romantic orientation.

Santana: I think I know how to make you feel better.

Quinn: I'm flattered Santana, but I'm really not into that.

Glee, 2x22 (New York)

Quinn says she's not "into that", however, doesn't mind sleeping with Santana two seasons later, even claiming she was just "experimenting".

We can't forget the relationship she had with Rachel, which was quite queer coded. It would be funny to see the girl who has dated several boys end up with a girl. "But the show already has too much representation with Brittana and Klaine" Hmm, and since when has too much representation been a problem? The LGBTQ community spent years being seen as invisible in series and films, a study in 2009, the same year Glee was released, revealed that only 3% of television series at that time had gay, lesbian or bisexual representation, and even though our situation is better than it was twenty years ago, for example, let's not forget that we are technically criminals in 73 countries. Take the She-Ra reboot for example, which has two sapphic couples with their own stories, too much representation will never be an issue.

What Quinn needed was a female writer, so that the whole story of wanting to be with Beth but not being able to or deciding to become a punk in season 3 could be explored more and not forgotten in the middle of romantic songs and Rachel Berry's exaggerated protagonism (even though Glee is limited to that lol). I don't think I'll ever forgive Ryan Murphy and Lea Michelle for being so arrogant and fighting with Dianna Agron to the point where Quinn was practically replaced by Kitty (I swear, I watched Glee at least two times but I can't remember any scene from season five where Quinn appeared) She appears in the sixth season because it is the last one and it would be fair for the original formation of the glee club to appear (if it weren't for that, Ryan would probably invent that Quinn went to live in another country or simply forget about her).

Quinn's story pretty much ends in season four, after which she barely appears.

What I would change

In the third season, instead of her becoming a punk, why not have her just come out of the closet? Quinn may be confused in the beginning because she's never felt this way about girls before and is paying "too much attention" to the other cheerios and may even ask Santana for advice on how to deal with these feelings, since Santana herself comes out as a lesbian in the same season. She could be lesbian, bisexual, pansexual or she doesn't even need labels, she could just like girls.

I would still keep that drama involving Beth because Quinn clearly didn't give her up for adoption because she wanted to, just because she had no choice, but maybe a girlfriend would make her see that Beth is better off with Shelby. The girlfriend could be a girl from the Cheerios, since Quinn has always considered them family, maybe a sweet and slightly naive girl like Marley to give more "light" to the cold and provocative Quinn Fabray.

In the fourth, fifth and sixth season I would explore more of the romance between the two and even perhaps some religious guilt on Quinn's part (let's not forget that she is supposed to be highly Christian) and at the end of the series she and this girlfriend can get married like Brittana and even adopt a child, I know that one child does not replace another, but here at least Quinn will maintain her desire to be a mother.

[stuffyflowers]

Ok payback for last one I'm gonna pay you to yap now

Sans/Toriel, Ceroba/Alphys, Starlo/Dalv (Because I'm evil)

Oh, and Sona/Ceroba. I'll give you some respite after throwing in the one I know you hate :3c

Finally back from touching sand and playing with friends I can answer these

Sans and toriel is like staroba to me I honestly don’t care if it’s romantic or not I just think they’re so important to each other regardless of how you personally see em. So makes sense n compels me. Don’t have much more to say honestly no notes. um shoutout to that moment in the pacifist ending where sans steals her phone and pretends to be her im thinkin abt it again,, they’re so cute guys ]: )

Ceroba and alphys is the definition of makes no damn sense but compels me. Like the chances of either of them voluntarily being in the same room as each other for any amount of time is sooo unlikely but ‘women who project their self loathing onto each other bc they recognise their own faults and mistakes in them’ is my favourite ship dynamic right now it’s so good. Obviously alphyne and cerobas friendship with starlo is the healthiest outcome for each of them in their respective pacifist endings but what if they just made each other worse forever and ever actually 💖 Be each others outlet for their own guilt, drag each other further down into a self destructive pit, forever believing they are rotten to the core and no one could ever forgive or understand them… um!

🌽 yaoi booooooo 🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅boooooooo🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅utdr fans we need to set higher yaoi standards there’s so much we could be cooking here but the one we’re latching onto is ‘guys who spoke to each other exactly once and have absolutely nothing interesting going on’ yaoi bc haha funny name + only (shippable) men in the main uty cast let’s be real here. Random thing that makes me lol when I think abt it is they’re literally standing as far away from each other as possible at all times in the one scene they’re actually in together like bros…….. there is nothing here. Sorry + no sense + not compelling + go ship starlo/el bailador or something instead im begging

Sonaroba obviously very similar boat to alphys and ceroba. My beloved trio of women who make mistakes that hurt people while trying to help/protect them. Sonaroba is even more interesting to me bc sona is essentially a worse-case-scenario ceroba: she never had that community to pull her out of her spiralling and grow as a person, she controls almost everyone. Staying this stagnant for as long as she has also means she’s even more stubborn than ceroba, too: ceroba is able to see the error in her thinking as soon as martlet is actually given the chance to reason with her, meanwhile sona in the imperfect endings doubles down on her initial perception of the monsters even when she acknowledges beforehand that she was wrong. She just can’t accept it. There’s so much to dig into 4 kcy. How would sona react to finding out what ceroba did, and how similar it is to her situation? Is there a mutual understanding that forms between them after they come clean to each other or does ceroba just become sonas scapegoat, “See? Monsters can’t be trusted! They will lie to and deceive you just to get what they want!” Would ceroba try to save her after the truth comes out by reasoning with her, even in the imperfect ending where she turns all of her friends into humans against their will?? What’s the limit for how far she’s willing to go to save a fucked up reflection of herself? Augh. Anyway. It’s a “kind of makes sense in the context of kissy cutie where the entire plot revolves around getting monsters to date frisks shitty racist aunt but probably not in any other context + COMPELS ME‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️”

[nogenderbee]

You can't hide from yandere Yelan, Xiao, Heizou

TW: yandere behavior, threats

They always know when and where you are. How do they get those kind of information? How do they react on you bringing in different situations?

⊱ Yelan is extremely good at hiding, so it's not a surprise that she knows your every move

⊱ she's not that possessive to keep you locked in one room but it's he who will decide how far can you go and to who you can talk to

⊱ she'll forgive it if you're just a nice person and say 'sorry, I'm busy' or some other excuse to person you're not allowed to talk to, and if they keep talking to you, you better ignore them and leave this problem to her

⊱ if you ever try to escape from her, she'll catch you even on the day she was supposed to have work

⊱ after that she'll keep you locked for 3 to 7 days, depending on either her mood or how well you can play it off

⊱ of course she'll get you anything you want while you're locked, you just have to say a word

⊱ but don't expect your little accident to go without a talk, sooner or later she'll get you to talk

"Now that we have a chance, tell me, why did you run off that day? I thought I was clear with how far you can go. Or even better question, why should I let you go? I think it would be better if you just stay here forever."

⊱ Xiao is an adepti which means he's s lot more stronger than you, that's why he called you weak and told you to never go too far without him by your side

⊱ if you do go too far tho, it doesn't matter if you got hurt or got rid of all the enemies barely breaking a sweat, he still will be mad at you for leaving without him and tell you that you're too weak to go outside alone

⊱ be ready that after this accident, Xiao will keep closer eye on you, he's not even hiding while watching you at this point, he watches Liyue while being in your room to make sure you won't go anywhere

⊱ you can't even move to another room without him following you. The only room that you can go into without him is bathroom, and he will still wait outside the bathroom

⊱ he doesn't even have to worry about you breaking out since even if bathroom had any windows, he blocked them

"Why won't you understand that you will die if you go there alone. Besides, don't forget that you cannot leave untill 5 years will pass because of your 'accident'. I was still nice enough to shorten your time just because you're a mortal!"

⊱ Heizou works as detective so it's not a surprise he can easily tell where you were by just having a look at you, and when he's not sure, he'll do a little 'inspection'

⊱ he's probably least possessive of all three, he told you that you can't leave Inazuma City and when you go out somewhere, you have to tell him everything you did in details when you come back

⊱ he can easily say when you're laying, and just by that he'll trap you in your room for like a day to teach you a lesson

⊱ just try leaving Inazuma City, he'll definitely find out thanks to some citizens telling him since he's a detective and he can just pin it to some detective work

⊱ once he catches you, he expects explanation on why you tried to run away from him, depending on your answer he will lock you for either 2 days or a month

⊱ and don't even try lying to him, at this point bad truth is better than pretty lies since he'll only make your punishment last up to 2 months longer

"Now partner, tell me why did you tried to ran away? And I'll warn you because I'm in good mood today, don't even try lying to me unless you want to make it worse on yourself."

❉⊱•═•⊰❉⊱•═•⊰❉⊱•═•⊰❉⊱•═•⊰❉⊱•═•⊰❉⊱•═•⊰❉

[captain-mj]

memory loss fic part 3?

👉🏽👈🏽

whenever you’re ready of course…..the chokehold it has on me is WILD lmao 😅

I did ALL of this on mobile so forgive any problems lol

Last Part!

Soap spent every moment he could by Ghost’s bedside. Ghost tried to stay awake, flinching when the morphine forced him under.

He looked so normal while asleep. Soap expected him to twitch but he never did, completely still besides the gentle up and down of his breathing. Then he’d wake up, pleading with Soap.

“Make it stop. I don’t want to go back anymore. Please don’t make me go back.” Simon mumbled to him, holding on to him like a lifeline. “Why can’t I just stay asleep with you?”

Soap sighed. “Simon, they’re not real. Roba is dead. You’re reliving memories.”

“I hate it. I hate it so much. I don’t want to wake up again.”

Soap felt sick. He knew Ghost didn’t understand. It was probably impossible to tell what was real and what wasn’t, so he assumed Soap wasn’t.

“I know. I know.” No ones knew if or when this would end. They weren’t sure if he was “gaining the memories in a linear timeline” or “just having Night terrors”. That’s what the nurses said. It didn’t make any sense to him. Their explanations were pointless. None of it really helped the situation.

Ghost changed. The person he had met the first day of his injury faded. Although he still trusted Soap, he didn’t let him touch him anymore. It was subtle, but he started to cover himself up, trying to prevent any of them observing him.

Soap left for just a moment and found him quietly painting a skull on his face in the bathroom, using a marker that had been left behind. When asked, he didn’t have an explanation on why.

Soap hated it. He tried to get Ghost to remember at first. Showed him anything he could think of. Their dogtags, sketches He made of the two of them, but they were all met with a blank stare and frustration.

Right now though, it was quiet. Simon had grabbed his hand.

“They left me there.”

“Who?”

“Washington and Sparks. They left me there…” Ghost stared at the tv. “I told them to. I wish I hadn’t. I don’t want to wake up.”

Soap rubbed little circles into his hands. “I’m sorry.”

“I miss my mom. Do you think she’s doing okay?”

“I’m sure she’s fine.” Soap’s voice cracked. His big, bad Lt looked very small. “You’re a good man for telling them to leave.” He knew it hadn’t mattered. Both were dead. Ghost didn’t yet.

“If this is real, why are you always here when i wake up?”

“I don’t want you to wake up alone.”

“I barely know who you are. Why would you care?”

Soap stared at him.

“Please don’t bring up the memory thing again.”

“It’s the memory thing again.”

“Why? What did i do to deserve you?” Ghost looked at him and it took Soap to realize what he was asking.

“You saved my life. You let me in. You didn’t judge me too harshly.” He leaned in, very slow so Simon could pull away. He kissed him softly and maybe some cheesy part of him hoped he’d pull away and Ghost would be fixed.

“Johnny. I really hope you’re real.” Ghost mumbled against him. He grabbed his shirt, trying to pull him closer but Soap stopped him.

“You have a still healing bullet wound. I’ll hurt you.” Soap said softly to him, cupping his face. Pretty eyelashes. Giant brown eyes. Just as gorgeous as always. “Do you want me to get you a surgical mask?”

“Yes.” Ghost nodded and Soap got him one, watching him cover that part of his face. Soap watched him eventually go to sleep.

Johnny tried to stay up but it was pointless. He fell asleep.

When he woke up, he heard movement but he assumed it was Price or one of the nurses, eyes staying closed. He felt gloved hands on his face a minute later and groaned.

“Johnny.”

Ghost.

Soap knew as soon as he heard him. He threw himself at him, making him stumble.

“Healing bullet wound, remember?” Ghost didn’t seem all that upset though.

"There you are. Fuck." He kissed his face all over, gripping his shoulders tight. "Don't ever fucking do that again."

"I'll try not to get another head injury. Where's my mask?"

Soap pulled away just long enough to find it and give it to him. He patted over him, as if checking for injuries again. "How did you get out of the cuffs?"

"Picked the lock."

"You're a scary bastard sometimes." Soap kissed Ghost until he was physically shoved away to let the man breath.

Ghost huffed and relaxed. "That was hell... Thanks for sticking with me."

"Aye... You said you didn't like my voice."

"Because I don't"

"Ouch." Soap held his hand over his heart.

"Okay, I like it a little."

"There you go, big guy."

[gingerylangylang1979]

Sick people are still sick, even if it's addiction or mental illness. We know that but we still don't think and act that way.

I've been wanting to post this for awhile but held back because it's a difficult topic but today I discovered some saddening news that made me feel it was time to talk about it. I'm not going to speak directly to that news or to any of the other situations I'm referencing. You can figure it out if you want but really it doesn't matter who the people are because the people can be anybody.

I'll start by saying I'm the child of a drug addict, my ex-boyfriend was an alcoholic, I've had many friends who have battled addiction and mental health issues. I was deeply hurt by growing up with an addict mother. It is the single most defining thing about me next to being a black woman. I am in my 40's and still grappling with the effects of growing up with her beside me and growing up with her absent from me. The abandonment, isolation, shame, uncertainty, fear, feelings of being cursed, never having normality, all of that will never leave me. All I can do is cope. And I experienced it all over again within a long term relationship in adulthood.

It's probably best that I was estranged from my mother. I know it's best that I left my ex for the last time. I didn't want those people in my live as they were and there was never any way to know if they would ever get better. My mother died. Not a drug related death, ironically she was killed by a drunk driver. Someone else's addiction took her. My ex is still living and the last I knew he was still drinking. A miracle could happen or he could drink the rest of his life.

But what I want to talk about is how we view these ill people. I hated my mother and my ex for a long, long time... until I didn't. That doesn't mean I'm not still angry or no longer hold them accountable. It just means I don't view them simply as my abusers and myself as their victim. It just means I had a shift, not only in how I see them but how I view all people. I had a religious/spiritual conversion at one of the darkest times of my life. Looking back I see that it happened shortly after I left my ex the last time and I was at a sort of rock bottom on every level. I won't go into the long story but will say I came out of the other side loving people. Not in a toxic positivity way, in a genuinely I value people and humanity was put here out of love, made with love, and we all deserve dignity and forgiveness, and can be redeemed no matter what. My whole worldview was rocked. It's a truly radical belief of my faith. Not the supernatural things. I think this because what the average person struggles with the most is just pure love for other people and love for themselves.

And when you view people with love, value life itself, all life, that you can look at a person who doesn't value their own well being and puts the well being of others, even those closest to them, in danger, and still say that person is a child of God who can be redeemed, who is not trash, who is not a loser.

And the funny thing is supposedly we are in a mental health awakening and supposedly see addiction and mental health ailments as sickness. But we still have a hard time accepting that when people are in the worst of their illness that they are indeed sick people. So we label, dismiss, and ridicule them. And if they are a celebrity, forget about it. We want to champion wellness, self care, and therapy but when someone actually desperately needs it and is struggling we shit on them.

I'm in no way saying all behavior is forgiven and there shouldn't be accountability. But after seeing some of what I've seen said recently and especially today it seems like people are just ready to tear someone's complete being down, not just condemn the behavior. I don't think my mom nor my ex were trash. They were deeply broken as we all are, in ways different from myself, or perhaps not and it just manifests in ways different than myself. It still hurts, it always hurts, but they were always hurting, too. It doesn't mean I needed to stay in a place they could hurt me but I didn't degrade their being in thought, speech, or action.

So these people don't deserve to have victims but they also don't deserve to be dehumanized.

We are all worthy of grace. So I'm going to continue to pray for healing of myself and those I know who are struggling.

[dirtyvulture]

😎Hello 🐀rat anon ( don’t worry it is just my ADHD hyper fixation that is driving me) and congrats on gaining some beef 😁. Also vulture I do consider (personally) what you write as canon because you are the creator and maker of the AU and no one know this world better than you, I also didn’t mean to write a time line more like listing every but it just turn out that way. So everything that I wrote down as a time line works just making the amends of putting the start of the situation ship before the performance elevation, cool good to know. When the time line does come a more harden thing instead of the floating one it is now please make it for me.

I would love to know how exactly the situation ship between Sergeant Nat and beef ( not sergeant at the time) happened. Ohhhhh I just had this realization, how long was the time frame of the start of the situation ship with Nat to the end with what ever beef had with the ex partner ( and the actual event of the tape happening and not the day it was leaked) ? I would also like to see the event of beef having to safe word and Nat reaction to that .

I also had the realization or the thought of Maybe Steve and Nat had a situation ship as well or at the very least Steve wanted to but it either ended with Nat going to beef or Nat went with beef instead of Steve for the situation ship. Or maybe Nat was in a situation ship with them both ( not doing the activities at the same time with each other, but separately and one on one) but Nat started to spend more time and more time with Beef which snowballed into a official relationship and of course Nat falling in love with Beef.

I was also thinking that in the ceremony  where beef and Nat were making love for the first time since  operation avalanche that in a addition to letting Beef have Nat any way that they wanted ( letting them have control) , Nat was intentionally loud …. louder than she normally is . All because Nat wanted beef not only to be comfortable physically and emotionally) but also confident. She could tell that beef lost some confidence ( in their looks , in their abilities and in many other things) and she could tell that we were worried ( in not being able to last , to not pleasing her and in many other things ) . So while Nat wasn’t faking it by any means ( she just is very quiet normally) she did show her reactions more than normal because we still can please her and showing us we still know her body . Letting us take control also guarantees that Nat doesn’t accidentally take things too far or accidentally give us something we couldn’t take . Nat would NEVER be able to forgive her self if that happened.

You are such a kind anon. I do love when people have their own HCs and timelines though, it's always fun to see what other people come up with. And I'm sure as I write more fics in this AU, you will see how things connect. :)

I've honestly never given any thought to how Nat and Sergeant Beef even got it on for the first time lol. Perhaps Nat just saw SB one day and thought they fit her criteria for being a beefy submissive himbo and it kind of just went from there. I think it would have been maybe a few months to a year since SB was with their ex though, so they would have had time to recover and consider a new relationship. Maybe in between Nat and SB hooking up for the first few times was when the tape got leaked? (Maybe the ex was jealous SB was with someone new?)

One day I might write what happened when SB had to use the safe word...we'll see

I actually don't think Steve and Nat ever hooked up or anything. Steve may have wanted to and tried to make advances, but Nat always turned him down because he was too controlling for her (in the way that Nat has to be the dom in the relationship).

Nat was probably the sweetest and softest we've seen her in the Ceremony fic (I don't know if I'll ever write her again like this either to be honest). But you can tell she really does care for SB and wants to make them happy and comfortable. SB is no longer just pretty eye candy or a fuck buddy. Nat truly loves them and wants to spend the rest of her life with them. ❤️

[arziaisfrench]

▪︎ IPKKND Ep 75 : An accident that changed everything

I'm glad Arnav was intending to make up for what he did last night. But I don't think he was about to apologize either lol ... 😬

And I also understand Khushi not wanting to hear anything coming from his mouth, he was being way too cruel !

It must be seriously tiring to see him in such excess of rage. But soon, she will understand that this anger is a mask he uses to hide his fears, that this excessive anger is in fact the result of a trigger episode.

His reaction was hilarious here looool ! "Tf she's saying?" 🤣😂

Then Khushi mistakenly scalds Arnav thinking to throw a glass of cold water on him after misunderstanding him, she thought he grabbed her dupita in order to challenge or disrespect her…

Arnav holds back his anger. He probably can also sense by her suprised face that she had no idea the water she throwed at him was still hot.

He could have legitimately indulged in a tantrum this time and yet he purposely chose to stay in control. But I don't think it's because he saw it was obviously a mistake but because he accepts this as a "punishment" he thought he deserved for all his cruel words and misunderstandings.

And then later Khushi not being able to contain this feeling of guilt decided to ask Arnav for forgiveness. Arnav looked so soft when she appeared to him. He wasn't trying to get angry with her to get revenge or anything. I find it very interesting that he didn't know how to act and what to expect from her arrival. I think he was looking at her bewildered and confused. "Why are you here now?"

Just before she had tried to talk to him and he kinda had slammed the door in her face. This scene suggested that there was resentment in his behavior. And yet, when she comes again he is not filled with agitation. Why? I think he is just emotionally hurt. He knows she didn't do it on purpose but he doesn't understand why she chose to act like this: with such vehemence. He feels vulnerable, but not to a point where he will take refuge in anger. She did not trigger him.

He tried to talk to her and the situation escalated. Which was not his intention. Then she slammed him down so she wouldn't have to continue interacting with him. And that hurt him like a child. The Choete in him, I find in this scene is very visible. The girl he likes hurt him. He is just sad and perplexed.

"She's apologizing to me? Is she? Why? Doesn't she hate me? Shouldn't she feel happy seeing me in pain after I mistreated her again? She's crying. She's crying for me? For me? Oooh ... wow ..."

Arnav is now in awe lol, probably I think one of the happiest moment of his life hahahaha ! He just discovered that the woman he loves* doesn't hate him. He's so cuuute here !

the woman he loves* : yes, now I'll now comfortably wrote he loves her instead of "the one is has feelings for" lol. I think at this precise stage and looking at his euphoric reaction in this episode, there is no need to be cautious anymore, the man is in love ! There is no doubt !

Look at his eyes, he so wanted to kiss her !! "She's so adorable", he's always been amused by this childish side of her hehe ! 😏

Now he gets to really understand the childish and truly innocent side of her personality fully. Just like how she was when they first met.

He misunderstood her being childish with him for the past days (and after everything they went through) to purposely trying to vent on him lool, to try to fight with him. He didn't think she'll ever want to be "seen" as this childish and innocent with/in front of him because he thought she hated him. He was so wrong.

This is the first time he openly smiles in front of her. He's so happy !! SO CUUUTE !!

"I'm strange? Lol. You're the most complicated mystery I ever met in my life Khushi Kumari Gupta !"

Arnav was like "Baby, why do you have to be such a weirdo, I mean, I guess I'll have to learn to get use to it, but damn, so weird" haha 😂

Ep14 - "I can't believe this" Ep75 - "Unbelievable"

= They are definitely in love. The circle is complete.

-- >From eps 50-75

Arnav & Khushi similiarities : -both are hard workers -both make a point to support the best they can their families -They have that dark thought in common. They'll consider suic*de if the most important person to them abandons them.

Arnav & khushi differences : -Arnav's psychological defense mechanism (post trauma) are much more obvious than Khushi's. He hides himself while Khushi denies herself. That's why Khushi aknowledge her being in love much later than Arnav. And he accepts his love way after Khushi does. -He uses money/ambition to survive against the trauma, and she uses faith.

[muwitch]

3 and 4 from the dark urge questions for Teth pleaaaase!

omg, thank you SM!!! *cracks fingers* it got lil lengthy so i'll place it under cut.

What would your Dark Urge consider to be their greatest skill? Is this accurate?

If asked, Teth would probably consider her greatest skill her god-given murder talent, however, it feels more like a given to her (forgive the tautology).

It is something that comes with her nature, and despite it being a skill to an extent [You still need a buffer time between joining the Temple and becoming an unstoppable killing machine, so efficiency in killing should be learned and mastered also. As other connected skills need to be polished too.], it is not what she attributes to herself entirely. If applying to herself she probably would say it’s self-control. 

In truth her greatest skill is resilience.

In the broader sense she has this pesky talent of preserving during difficult situations, sometimes through sheer spite and other negative emotions, but she’d mastered it over years, and yes it is a skill to compress and govern her emotions (most of the time), to be able to creatively problem-solve and have a certain degree of flexibility for the bigger picture.

It’s something that helped her retain a fracture of personality and survive the horrors of being the middle child in the loving bhaalspawn family, what made her technically head of the Temple aside from birthright, it's something that makes her, quote Kressa, indomitable. 

[It’s something she prizes about herself in a sense that it makes her feel a semblance of control (which is a forbidden thing in itself when thinking of it) and helps her detach when necessary.]

It’s also her absolutely illogical will to live (I am looking at the whole tadpoling situation), crawling back from the dead over and over, despite technically being her Father’s favourite sacrificial lamb and supposed last living thing on Toril. 

Resilience does remain post-tadpole, however, if asked the same question, she’d probably say something like charisma, which is, obviously, sarcasm.

What would your Dark Urge consider to be their greatest flaw? Is this accurate?

For pre-tadpole Teth that would be…mortality. Or rather what she considers mortal things. 

Anything that would stray her from the path charted by her Father. It’s in her nature to retrospect and do a lot of self-digging, and what she finds inside underneath years of servitude and gore is both a dirty secret and a greatest flaw she can only mask with pragmatism and lying.

[She’s prone to address Gortash as mortal with both disdain and childish envy in her inner monologues.]

It’s the emotional void that never truly fills and only aches, sometimes sated by momentary urges. The fragments left of the life before (though they are bleak and blurry, half-fantasies too) Teth wishes she could discard. The substitutes for connections she still needs to an extent (preventing her from killing Orin years ago). Basically all the things that come to her without self restraint the moment the weight of memory is lifted.

Post-tadpole Teth probably considers her biggest flaw the initial inability to pragma her way through certain things. She’s progressively more moody, but the lack of understanding is really killing her. She tries to rationalise but it just…doesn’t work.

It’s like barking through bloody teeth into the silence. That void drives her absolutely mad.

It’s tightly related to the power play and feeling in or out of control. That’s what makes her a bit distant from the party (adding emotional distancing as a flaw but she'll never admit).

It makes her burst out on whim if she understands others hold knowledge over her she does not possess (I am looking at Ketheric). There’s no way to ensure the reliability of the source and that uncertainty just. It’s the worst.

And for someone who once treasured her own self-control and feeling of power, lack thereof even a bit is the worst thing ever.

[late-nite-scholar]

Aug 8th (Day 4): Prompt- Mortal / Sanctuary 

Day 4: Sanctuary- Nythauriel is beginning her journey to see the world outside her people’s hiding places, and meets the last person she ever expects to. But thankfully not everything is as it was when her people went into hiding. Post-Dawnguard. Prompts by @tes-summer-fest

Redguard LDB x Farkas (mention only)

Warnings- None 

Wordcount- ~1400

Description in alt text. Made in HeroForge

***

The world was so much bigger than the hidden valley and the cave network implied. Even the trade network tunnels to the other enclaves didn't truly convey how much world there was out there beyond their sanctuary. 

It's a good thing I've got time to explore it. Nythauriel thought to herself, suddenly thankful for her people's long lifespans. Perhaps she could explore a lot of this world. There were even rumors some of her people had escaped to the old Atmoran homeland. Maybe it would be worth taking a trip. Not that she'd ever been on a boat, but the idea was rather exciting. 

Unfortunately, the world wasn't exactly friendly to someone like her. 

A group of men with pitchforks and improvised weapons blocked her path. The big man in the middle stabbed toward her with the rake he held.

"We don't want no Thalmor in our village!" he snarled. 

She held up her hands, nearly as white as the snow that still held out against the warm sun in shaded corners. "I'm not Thalmor. I'm not even Altmer. I'm just passing through. I won't even stop, I promise." 

"Don't come any closer!" The man shouted again.

"There's no need for that. I'll escort the lady, if she'd like." A soft, gruff voice spoke up behind her. 

She turned, and found herself facing an enormously large Nord as tall as herself but much more broad. He was no doubt a warrior, dressed in well-made (and equally well-used) armor and carrying a large, black battleaxe on his back. But his silver eyes were kind and his smile gentle and she found herself suddenly at ease. She didn't trust humans as a rule, but this one? Somehow she just knew that this one was alright. 

He led her past the mob, offering her a large, muscular arm. She took it, her face warming. Villagers were looking askance at them; this big Nord escorting probably the palest mer any of them had ever seen. He chuckled. 

"This is gonna start rumors. I hope it won't get you in trouble." 

She giggled in return. "I'll be fine. What about you?" 

"My wife'll forgive me when I explain the situation." 

They made their way out of the village and back onto the road. As they walked, she slipped her hand out of the man's arm. "Thank you so much for doing that." 

"You probably get a lot of that, don't you? Hostility, I mean?" 

"Yeah. I haven't been traveling that much yet, but yeah." She held out her hand, "I'm Nythauriel, by the way." 

"Well met. I'm Farkas." They shook hands. 

"Well met, indeed. I'm glad you came by. Not many will stand up for a mer out here in the arse end of nowhere." 

"I'm here to help. I'm a Companion, it's what we do." 

"A Companion? Who are you a companion of?" 

He brightened. "Oh, you haven't heard of us? It comes from our founders, the Five Hundred Companions of Ysgramor." 

She froze, and everything got really far away. Like looking through a small tube. Then blackness overtook her without warning. 

Her eyes opened slightly to the feeling of being shaken. She saw the man's face and immediately fainted again.

***

Awareness came back slowly. She was lying on her bedroll, her pack set beside her. A small fire burned to her right, the man sitting and poking it with a stick. His axe sat propped up beside him, and her blood turned cold as she recognized it. 

He turned at the sound of her gasp, relief washing over his face. "Thank the Nine! I was startin’ to get worried. Here, I made this. You should drink it." He took out a cup and filled it from a kettle sitting by the fire.

"What is that?" she demanded. 

"It's a healing draught. Should make you feel better. Tastes half decent, too. Are you ill, or injured? You just kinda fainted there." 

"Where are we?" She backed up. They weren't on the road. She couldn't even see the road! "Where have you taken me?" 

"It's a wayside camp. Lots of people use it cause it's a little quieter. I didn't want you lyin’ in the road where you could get trampled." He frowned. "Is everything okay?" 

Nythauriel pulled a knife from her belt. Farkas held up his hands as she snarled. "Nice try, Companion of Ysgramor. But your kind has already killed enough of mine. You won't have me, too!" 

His brows knit together, but he made no move towards her. "I don't wanna kill anybody. Are you sure you're okay? I'm getting kinda worried…" 

"Don't play dumb with me! You belong to a group founded on the genocide of my people! You carry Wuuthrad, the axe that yearns to taste my blood! As if you haven't done enough to us! Killed us by the thousands, drove us into hiding, others into the depravity of the Dwemer until they were twisted, wretched husks of themselves! How dare you pretend you don't know!" she shouted. 

She watched realization dawn on his face. "You mean the Falmer… the Betrayed… you're a Snow Elf?" 

"How do you know to call them that?" She hissed. 

"My wife had a quest. We went to an ancient temple of your people. There was a priest of sorts there, a Snow Elf like you. That's what he called them." Farkas shook his head. "But he thought he was the last of your kind besides the Betrayed." 

"What temple? What priest?" 

"We call him Akatosh, but the priest said your people call him Auri-El. It was a huge place, bigger than any human temple I've ever seen. The priest was named Gelebor. He's still there, as far as I know." 

"Knight Paladin Gelebor is alive?" She couldn't believe what she was hearing! "I learned about him in our history studies! He's… and the temple is still there…" 

"Yeah. He's the only one there now." 

"How did you get through the wayshrines then? Didn't you need to go through them to get in?" 

"There were spirits guarding each one. They'd tell us their message and we'd go through." 

"How did your wife end up going there, or even know where it was? We don’t even know where it is anymore!" 

"It's a long story but basically we were dealing with vampires and needed Auri-El's bow." 

"Auri-El's bow?" She shook her head. "Bullshit! Next you're going to tell me you read it in an Elder Scroll!" 

Farkas shrugged. "We kinda did." 

"What is your wife? That is way too much stuff for one person. Is she a goddess?"

"I think she is." He smiled softly. "She's Yokudan, from Hammerfell.”

“I’m not familiar with those people, I’m afraid.”

“You probably wouldn't be. They showed up a lot later. She's also Dragonborn, and that seems to be what attracts all the strange stuff.” 

"Dovahkiin…" She frowned and waved her hand, a flash of blue light sparking from her fingers. "You're not lying…" 

"What was that?" 

"A spell we call 'Liar's Bane'. It's like clairvoyance, but so I can see if you're lying. And… you aren't." 

"I'm not. Drink? You seem better but it couldn't hurt." 

She took the tea and sipped it. It was rather nice, herbaceous and gentle. She looked over at Farkas again. "I'm sorry for freaking out." 

"It's okay. I don't blame you. That must've been quite the shock. I, uh, didn't expect to meet another Snow Elf, either." 

"Yeah, we tend to keep to our hidden places, our sanctuaries. It's the only way to stay safe." 

"I understand. Where will you go now?" 

"I'm traveling, seeing the world. I have heard stories of the Skyforge, and other places." 

"Well I'm heading home to Whiterun, and our hall is right below the Skyforge. I mean, I understand if you don't want to be anywhere near Jorrvaskr…" 

"Do you still have Auri-El's bow?" 

"We do." 

"I'd like to see it." She smiled. "I mean, if the rest of the Companions are like you, I think it'll be okay." 

"Well, my wife is our Harbinger, our leader, and she won't let anything happen to a guest. I can promise you that." 

"And if we travel together, it should be safer, right?" 

"Should be, yeah." 

A giggle burst from her lips. "A Companion and a Snow Elf walk into Whiterun…" 

"Sounds like the start of a joke. Or a good story." 

"Well, I hope it's the latter."

He gave her that gentle smile again. "I hope so, too." 

[its-more-than-just-a-fantasy]

While working on a little comic strip with Via and her mom (which I'd like to post as soon as I find an artist and if can't find one I'll post my ugly sketches), I've thought a little about their relationship, it's really a pity that till now it's never been shown any moment between them, I understand they want to emphasize the relationship with her dad more than anything, cause they want to point out they're closer to each other than she is or could, ever, be with her mom and while I don't doubt they have a good dad/ daughter relationship in general, I've noticed that Via has certain attitudes towards her dad sometimes. She loves him yes, but she can be extremely harsh with him when he does something wrong like the time they went to Loo Loo land, she was pretty much annoyed and angry for the entire episode, probably due to her parents fighting ofc, but she had it in particularly for her dad...and also the time they had to go and stargazing together, but he couldn't accompany her cause he was busy elsewhere, making her angry once again and in both situations we see her "run away" her dad and she does it again a third time, now

Spoilers ahead don't keep reading if you don't want to get spoilered

I don't know how many have seen already the leak of the last episode of this season, cause it's still around the internet Idk why ( dunno why the creator says nothing about it, I've never seen her asking once to remove any leaks from the her patreon page ever, even recently there was another leak, I wonder if it's all planned..sorry I'm quite suspicious when it comes to the entertaining world but whatever) and again she is extremely angry with her dad and she literally turns her back on him, and this time she doesn't return home with him. I saw many saying that Stella is most likely manipulating Via to make sure her daughter will be on her side, in proper time! But if the two of them have never had a good or any relationship at all, (may it be because Stella is a very affectless mom or for other reasons) and since she loves her dad very much why is it that Via even believe what Stella tells her? In the leak we can see that Via clearly overhears her mom telling her uncle that Stolas has phoned her and tried to communicate with Via, but Stella denied him that and lied to her daughter or simply didn't tell Via that, also I'm pretty sure she is well aware of her mom's behaviours soo I don't understand why she didn't even get mad at her mom, dunno you but if I were in her shoes and if I would have found out my mom have done something like that to me, knowing how much I care about my dad, I would have been very angry at her, but Via didn't do any of that, she just isolate herself in her room and not only, in the end she even decides to stay with her mom and uncle!! 👀 I'm convinced that There is some truth behind every lie, and probably whatever stuff Stella is telling her daughter, the rare occasions they talk at least, have forced Via to "believe"her mom, otherwise I can't explain why she decided not to return home with Stolas and forgive him again, but instead she thinks it's better to stay with Stella.

Personally

I think Via has been a little bit neglected by her parents at some point, also I don't think there's a lot of communication between the 3 of them, maybe cause the parents are too occupied to fight each other all the time and pay her no attention.

I have also this doubt on why, between her parents, the one she is always "mad" with is her dad, I still have to see Via complaining or saying anything against her mom( It could be cause they're not that close to each other ofc so she doesn't even consider her mom much)

[emisirrelevant]

WE ARE THE TIGERS/WATT WEEK DAY 5

Happy We Are the Tigers Week Day 5 everyone!!

Today's prompt: Mistletoe

You probably know the drill by now, but here I am, presenting you with another song commentary/analysis to celebrate the day. Since the prompt is Mistletoe and I really couldn't come up with anything super creative, and I can't draw to save my life (shoutout to those who have been blessed with talent in the fanart department) today's song commentary/analysis will be Wallflower, as Mistletoe is a plant, and thus reminded me of the song, which also has a reference to a plant.

Okay, now that I'm done explaining my reasoning for picking the song, let's get into it.

•Um I absolutely LOVE how this song starts. Such a catchy little hook.

•Oh GOD I cannot WAIT to hear Lauren and Wonu sing this together as Riley and Cairo again.

•"Nobody remembers 4th grade Riley" way to start a song lol

•"she will never speak up" she just has other methods of communication, ok, and if that involves murder, well-

•"She's scared to be wrong" Well Cairo got her there, tbh

RILEY IS A WALLFLOWER

•"The type of little kid who gets paralyzed with fear when she gets called on" OKAY sorry Cairo but I can't defend you here, I was this person in school irl so

•"It was me who decided you could be so much more than they could see" HIT AFTER HIT, whatever Preston put in this song... MAN, I love it

•"If I never saved you what would you have done" I wonder if either of them ever thought how toxic/dependent their relationship with each other was

•"You would be no one" Singing this instead of saying it, idk if that softens the blow or is just equally as bad-

•"So forgive me for doing what's best for you" Alternate universe, what would it have been like if Cairo and Riley didn't see each other's situations like this- like what if Cairo didn't feel like she needed to "save" Riley and vice versa

•"So forgive me for trrryyyyYYYing to make this easier" WONU GIVING VOCALS here

•"I'll always be on your team" Until your best friend gets arrested

•"You are nothing, you have nothing, without me" again, if my best friend told that to me, much less SANG that, idk man. For musical purposes though, damn.

•"Everyone remembers sophomore Cairo" how Cairo says nobody and Riley says everybody, says a lot about their personalities and I love this little detail.

•"Cause she'll never be wrong, anything but wallflower" Can we get an opposite word for wallflower to call Cairo?

•"But who has your back every single time you crack" The way Riley sings this line later in The Breakdown tho

•"See it's me who's beside you constantly making sure you don't see how much everyone is trashing us for"

•OOH YES and this is my favorite part

•ALL THE HARMONIES YESSSS

•SING IT ICONS

•They are the moment right now

•I also loveeee watching this in the slime tutorial, the stage blocking in this song is great

•One thing I did note when listening to the song again, is how Cairo sings that line about having Riley's back, but interestingly Riley when she sings about Cairo never does. Cairo says she stepped in to save the other kids from teasing Riley, but Riley just sang about how Cairo mouthed off and got into fights, not even if she helped Cairo at all.

•I wonder if that's really subtle foreshadowing now that I think about it.

•OH MY GOD AND THEN THIS PART I LOVE IT SOOOOO MUCH

•When they both separate and sing their own part of the song-

And Riley's like "SO FORGIVE ME FOR DOING WHAT'S BEST FOR YOU"

And meanwhile Cairo's all like "BUT WHO HAD YOUR BACK WHEN YOU HAD A HEART ATTACK"

•AND THEN THE INSTRUMENTAL IN THE BACK WHEN THIS IS ALL HAPPENING OH MY GOD

•Chef's kiss chef's kiss chef's kiss

Is it really a duet with your bestie who may not actually be that, giving enemies to lovers if you don't sing "YOU ARE NOTHING, YOU HAVE NOTHING, WITHOUT MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE"

•"Riley is a wallflower" DUH DUH

•I love how it ends like that, like Cairo has to feel like she needs to be the one who has the last word

•This song is a 10/10 about those kinds of friendships.

I love my cheerwives.