#she has so much power and doesn't get to use it enough
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alchemistc · 1 day ago
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Part One
Oh, I've got plenty to be thankful for
I've got eyes to see with
Ears to hear with
Arms to hug with
Lips to kiss with
Someone to adore
-bing crosby
He keeps waiting for someone to say something. To accuse him of lingering where he doesn't belong, or remind him he'd never actually made it all the way in. To tell him to go home, maybe get a halfhearted promise to let him know how Buck is at some point.
Maddie lays an exhausted head on his shoulder and Bobby sneaks him a slice of pumpkin pie he's apparently been hiding in the tote at his feet. Hen tosses him a power bank with a lightning cord and Karen makes a joke about his holiday attire.
When the coffee comes, Howie takes the trip to the lobby with him, pulls out his wallet and does his damnedest to strong arm Tommy into letting him tip the haggard looking girl another twenty bucks on top of the fifty Tommy'd figured was appropriate for having to balance a literal stack of hot beverages from the parking lot on Thanksgiving. She eyes them both with a smile and Tommy is more compelled the grab the drink carriers from her tired arms than stop Howie.
They're halfway back when Howie purposely slows his pace, and Tommy fights the urge to pick his up and avoid whatever's coming down on him. "So. Was this the wake up call you needed, or can I expect Buck to order a freezer on a Black Friday deal for my garage to store more baked goods?"
He doesn't know what that means.
He can extrapolate, though. "He's been baking?"
"Tommy, I cannot stress enough exactly how much he's been baking."
He'd tried his hand at a few things here and there, but Tommy's used to experimental chef Evan Buckley, not baking Evan Buckley. To be fair, if he'd seen Evan working a KitchenAid, apron tied loose and flour on a cheekbone, Tommy doubts he'd have actually had the time to finish whatever he had planned. That was then, of course.
"What was he doing on that trail, Howie?" That, too, he could maybe extrapolate. He doesn't want to, but he could.
Howie eyes him. Uses his free arm to elbow Tommy in the ribs. "You were the first person he ever invited to a 118 Thanksgiving, you know. My guess? He wasn't in the mood to be reminded of it while there was no room in the oven to bake away his feelings."
Yeah.
Jax had been over the moon when Tommy offered to take his shift, no trades necessary. What would the point have been, when Christmas and New Year's would be unbooked too?
Evan had bribed like six different people to ensure they'd be able to swing dinner on the day. Hobbes had sounded so thrilled to hear Tommy asking for the time off that he'd approved it without even looking at the shift.
"I'm just warning you in advance. The grovelling process is gonna involve eating your weight in loaves, most likely."
And that's that, apparently. No heavy handed warnings, no suspicion about why Tommy hasn't fucked off yet. Like it's some foregone conclusion that Tommy's not gonna panic and bolt a second time. Nothing has changed, yet Tommy gets the feeling they're all expecting some tearful reunion and a return to TommyandBuck.
Tommy slips the tea into Maddie's hands and watches her sniff it in distaste, which is an interesting nugget he'll have to revisit later if -
If.
There's no guarantees, here. That Tommy will be able to articulate how fucking terrified he is, that Evan will understand it. That the two of them will find a way through it together. All he has to go on is a solo hike on a day Evan should have been with family, an apparent bakery full of feelings spread between the 118, and the quiet calm that had washed over him when Eddie prompted him to make a decision.
Feet to the fire, he'd stayed.
---
Maddie's pregnant. It hits him between the eyes right around hour three of sit-and-wait. He's not an idiot, or a fool, and he hasn't spoken to any of these people in weeks so he's not going to announce it to the world, but somewhere in between the sporadic naps on Tommy's shoulder and the way she is attempting (failing) to power through her now cold tea makes him think. She and Bobby had driven here, and it's clear everyone else had been indulging. Maddie's no lush, but he's seen her knock back half a bottle of wine before when she's got nowhere to be.
She excuses herself to the bathroom for a third time, looking a little green, and Tommy ends up locked in a staring contest with Howie that only ends when Tommy mimes zipping his lips.
He still hasn't gotten the story about Eddie and why he's not here.
Bobby and Athena are apparently closing in on a new house.
Howie is less than a year away from having a second kid.
Athena's kids are apparently at Howie and Maddie's, attempting to keep Mara and Jee from destroying the house in the absence of adults.
And Tommy wants.
Wanting has never really been the problem, though. Wanting is the easy part. Wanting doesn't get him over the hurdle of knowing he's not enough. For Evan, for this family he's built that just keeps growing bigger and bigger. It'd been a relief, those first few days after, not to have to wonder which member of the 118 would land in the hospital next, not to have to rearrange something else on his schedule because Evan was convinced he was cursed, or Eddie'd had another shitty call with Christopher.
The relief hadn't lasted. A week in, he'd stayed up all night demolishing the half-bath off his dining room, because he'd been putting it off for months and he'd nearly texted Evan something that was startlingly revealing and left him exposed on all sides. Two weeks in he'd finished grouting the backsplash in his kitchen. And in between, he wondered how Eddie was doing, if he'd made any progress with his son. He'd wondered if Maddie enjoyed the bottle of wine they'd brought back from a spur of the moment trip to Napa. He'd wondered how Nash was doing, if he was readjusting to having his crew and his station back. He wondered how Hen and Karen were, how many things Denny had already gotten stuck in his cast trying to ease an itch.
He'd wondered, and he'd sat in it, and then he'd rewired the shoddy work an electrician had done in his spare room that he kept telling himself he'd get around to.
The wanting never goes away. He just finds new places to put it when he starts to care too much.
"Kinard and Buckley?"
Maddie's still in the restroom. Tommy - has no fucking clue why the nurse is staring at them like they'll just materialize the right people. She sucks in her lips and gives him a dead eyed stare before her eyes dart to his chest. More specifically, the nameplate on his chest.
Tommy blinks.
---
The having is where he's always floundered. Things are temporary. People are temporary. He's always been borrowing. Borrowing time, attention, affection.
For a few months there, he'd really started to think he could handle the having. That he'd get to keep it.
---
"I'm Buckley, he's Kinard," Maddie says from somewhere over his left shoulder, and he turns in time to see her adjusting her jacket, wiping at her lip. She stabilizes, looking unfazed, and stands tall. As tall as she can, at least. "You have news about my brother?"
The nurse glances around the room. No one is bothering to pretend not to be listening. Maddie hovers a wave behind her.
"Ignore the audience, we're all waiting with bated breath to see how obnoxious my brothers going to be. It depends entirely on whether or not he gets pie tonight."
She gives them all a disapproving look. This must not be one of their normal nurses.
Christ. They have normal nurses.
"Well, no pie tonight, but he should be able to eat a sandwich in the morning."
He's fine. He's fine.
Tommy knew going in that most of his injuries were superficial. The ribs had been a concern but with the pain meds and the collar he hadn't really had a chance to exacerbate those injuries. There's no reason he should feel quite so relieved to know that Evan will have a few annoying splints to work around and he'll probably need to rehab his ankle for a couple weeks once it's healed. The concussion isn't ideal, and he'll need help for a few days, but he's fine.
Tommy can feel the tears building.
"He'll likely be out for a few more hours, but I'll let you know when he's set up in a room. Two visitors at a time," she warns. "The concussion will effect his response time. Don't be surprised if he doesn't remember much, loses his train of thought."
Hen shifts somewhere behind him. It feels a bit like she's being held back from correcting the nurse about the normal side effects.
Things move on around him. The nurse leaves, Hen passes a Stanley cup around that definitely isn't filled with water, the normal sigh of relief is released while Maddie drops into the seat next to him with a groan, the team has a strange competition around him to battle for visitor position.
Tommy breathes.
I should go, Tommy thinks to himself, as half the people in the room raise their phones.
His own phone vibrates against his thigh.
A message from Howie, time stamped two minutes - Tommy squints to make sure - two minutes ago, an update on Evan. Another from Eddie reminding them all to give Buck a patent Eddie look from him while they were giving him shit. A selfie of Eddie, with Christopher somewhat reluctantly bending into the picture over his shoulder.
In another thread, he's got three messages from Eddie.
If I have to remove you from this group I'm sending my kid after you with his crutches.
You guys hiked Griffith Park for your Not-A-One-Month-Anniversary-We-Swear date, right?
Send Buck my love. Not like that, though.
Tommy sends back: When the fuck did he add me to his emergency contacts? and then decides he doesn't want to know anyway so he turns off his phone.
---
Maddie goes alone, and Tommy spends the time alternating between tapping his foot against the tile to distraction, and clamping his hand over his knee in an attempt to stop the tapping.
Bobby and Athena go next, then Hen and Karen. Then they're pulling on jackets and promising to save a plate for Buck.
Howie slips away for a few minutes and then returns, looking amused. "You think everyone else got the same greeting?" he asks his wife, who grins tiredly at him, pats his wrist. Her gaze turns to Tommy.
"Should we stay?"
That's a trap of a question. That's an assumption Tommy doesn't have a clue how to handle. He clears his throat. Shakes a few curls loose.
"What makes you think he'd want me to?"
Maddie's perfected the unimpressed eyebrow. It must be a parent thing.
Tommy barely holds in the sigh. "Go enjoy your meal."
---
Evan's been watching the door. It's clear the moment Tommy makes it to the threshold - he presses up, winces, tips sideways just enough to peek around the corner.
"Tommy," he says, and his expression melts.
Tommy's heard some iteration of that name a million times. Tom, from his dad. Tommy, fond and quiet from his mother, who'd never really learned how to speak up before she was gone. Thomas, in school, from teachers annoyed that he wouldn't just apply himself.
He was Kinard, to teammates, then fellow soldiers, to the firefighters he'd worked alongside for a decade before he ever let any of them know him.
No one says his name with quite so much reverence as Evan Buckley. He's convinced himself, over the last few weeks, that he'd been hearing adulation in that tone. But now it just sounds...relieved. Happy.
Evan slumps back and tries to cross his arms in a pout. There are too many cords and wires attached to him for it to work. "I'm pretty sure I'm mad at you," he says, and Tommy steps over the threshold.
---
Hobbes sounds fucking thrilled to find out he's going to be down a pilot for five days.
Evan throws a fit when he finds out Tommy's plan is to sleep on his own couch for the short duration of Evan's stay. Evan wins the proceeding argument and doesn't even complain that Tommy hadn't argued too hard
Bobby brings over enough leftovers to keep them in turkey sandwiches for a week, and Tommy doesn't think to ask how he got Tommy's address.
Tommy breathes. Tommy thinks. Once Evan can hold a train of thought for more than five minutes, Tommy talks.
Evan listens.
---
"So no Christmas," Evan pouts, and Tommy wants to bite it. "And no New Year's."
Tommy shifts a hand over his shoulder, tucks his chin over top of it so he can't see the pout anymore. "We were both already working those anyway."
"Do people do anything to celebrate Presidents Day?"
"Evan."
"Tommy," Evan mocks, and pulls far enough away to catch his gaze. "In the interest of transparency that was mostly a cover so I didn't ask about Valentine's Day."
"Is this you not asking about Valentine's Day?"
His smile is deceptively sweet. "I need help with my sandwich."
Tommy's seen him balancing a glass of water, his phone, two books and a takeout bag in his one good hand. He's absolutely full of shit.
Tommy leans forward to grab the sandwich off Evan's plate for him.
---
"You should stay," Tommy says, an hour after midnight two days into the new year. He's tipsy on his second glass of cheap champagne and he can't think of a reason to keep this in, anymore. Evan crinkles a brow at him.
"I... wasn't planning to go?"
There's a gold crown perched in his curls, and Tommy still hasn't taken the cheap plastic 2025 glasses off. The house is quiet, and there'd been shockingly few fires started by fireworks this year, so he's less tired than he'd expected to be.
"I meant -." Tommy starts, and then pauses. "I meant permanently. You should live here."
Evan laughs. Takes a bite out of his cake, and rolls his eyes, and then...stops. His entire body stills. "What."
It's ridiculous. The very thing that had pushed Tommy up out of his seat just a few months ago, sent him out the loft door with wet eyes and a heaviness in his heart.
"Tommy," Evan prompts, and Tommy catches the hand frozen on the countertop. He'd planned to hold this back, wait until something significant or poignant. But Evan had baked them a red velvet cake and argued with him the entire drive back from dinner about the proper way to fold a towel, and Tommy's tired of denying this isn't everything he's refused to let himself want for decades.
"You don't have to say yes just to confirm you're not breaking up with me," he tries to joke, and it falls flat.
"Tommy," Evan murmurs, quieter but more insistent.
"I'm serious. I want you here. I want -."
"Yes," Evan says, and squeezes his hand before he ducks his head bashfully. "Sorry. Continue."
"I want a life with you." The tears tickle at the back of his throat. He's gonna fucking cry, again. He'd always fucking known opening himself up to this was just an invitation for more tears in his life.
He can't quite convince himself the rest doesn't make them worth it.
"Yes. Again. Tommy, of course." He tips his chin. Purses his lips. "If you're sure."
Tommy swallows down the lump in his throat. He's never been more sure or more terrified of anything in his life. So he tells him so.
The words are like knives, but he works his way through the soreness, fights up past the fear that he's not sure will ever completely go away, and claws past the reminder that it's been a blink of an eye since Tommy walked out on this.
"Well. You can't walk out of your own house," Evan points out when he's finished, and of all things, it's that that snaps the tension of for once in his life prioritizing something other than fucking survival. He tips a grin, curls his elbow to bring their entwined hands to his lips. "It's gonna take years to coordinate another Thanksgiving with everyone," he bemoans, looking suspiciously watery-eyed himself as he holds Tommy's own wet gaze.
Tommy can extrapolate from that.
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housewarningparty · 3 days ago
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Part of why it's so frustrating to me that we didn't have the opportunity to spend more time during Vi's pit fighter era and Caitlyn's dictator phase is bc like. Well, I mean those are both hugely significant and interesting ways for them to cope that are deeply reflective of the fundamental differences in their characters
Vi, an undercity kid that spent most of her formative years imprisoned, seeks out pain and oblivion. She finds herself lost and abandoned and immediately reaches for what she's most familiar with - violence. The self harming nature of her fighting career is obvious but I think the other stuff we see in the montage deserved more time too. She drinks to an unhealthy excess, blacking out, getting into more violent altercations. We don't see her seeking out any form of intimacy or connection with people - there are no depicted one night stands or groupies. Instead we see her hallucinating Caitlyn and reacting violently when a guy tries dancing with her.
Whether it's an intrinsic part of her or a trait that was cultivated through trauma, we know that Vi doesn't have many close relationships, but she loves the people near to her fiercely. It's kind of heartbreaking and so fucking interesting that when she's apart from Caitlyn she doesn't try to fill the void with other people. She just misses her.
Vi reacts to being left behind by isolating herself further. She reacts to being hurt by piling more hurt onto herself, channeling her pain into aggression, and when she's not fighting she's trying to numb herself with alcohol. It's a brutal montage and I really wish we'd been able to dive in more to Vi's self destructive tendencies.
Caitlyn meanwhile also reaches for the familiar but in a totally different way. We see her indulging her privilege in a very particular way. Unlike Vi, instead of fully isolating or burying her pain, we see her hold her grief tight in both hands and use it as fuel. She channels her pain into obsessively hunting down Jinx and suppressing Zaun through her increasingly militarized policing campaign. She becomes a workaholic who can't ever stop focusing on her agenda, even as the doubts she has continue to increase. She's stone cold sober in every scene and the combat practice she undertakes at Ambessa's side is controlled, goal-oriented and the complete opposite of Vi's reckless prize fighting.
Instead of solitude, we see her take up with a subordinate that she doesn't have a strong emotional attachment to and take comfort in sex within a dynamic where she perceives she has total control. Maddie doesn't mean enough to Caitlyn to meaningfully challenge her, which we see as Caitlyn ignores her advice and pulls away from her in bed. Hooking up with someone under her is a move that it's hard to imagine the idealistic s1 version of Caitlyn ever approving of and that's why it's so interesting to me. I think it highlights how much of s1 Caitlyn's morality is related to her resisting the ability to abuse her privilege as a favored daughter of Piltover. In s2, she forgoes her earlier attempts for egalitarian reform and justice in favor of indulging more wantonly with her baser impulses for control and power and immediate satisfaction. It suggests this beautiful death by a thousand cuts of her moral center as she loosens her grip on her noble ideals and gives in to this rash impulse, and that pragmatic cruelty, and this selfish want until she's in so deep she's become the sort of brutal oppressive force she had once tried to tear down.
The difference between them in this part of the show is so striking and it's a shame to me that we never get to really see them confront these versions of each other.
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madameevil · 18 hours ago
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I'll try to divide this into 2 parts. First part using game codex entries, other DA canon media, etc to refute points or counter points. Second to point out how some of these points are due to personal interpretations differing. So basically... let's use "facts" for most of the first half and "opinions" in the second. No guarantee that'll work out as I type this but that's the goal at least.
"Solas already knows who Rook is. He doesn't need much time to know who Rook is, it's not a problem for him." Ok but he doesn't. He thinks he does. He thinks he has Rook all pinned down. It's why he doesn't expect Rook to escape the Prison of Regret but Rook does. Solas is convinced that all of his manipulation to get Rook to drown in regret is enough to keep them trapped in that prison. In his pride, he doesn't expect Rook to escape. He once again doesn't expect Rook to see through his final betrayal about the veil. He also doesn't expect Rook to have enough cards by the end to stop him (which is conditional based on what you do in the game)
"If Cassandra rebuilds the Seekers, she is able to deal with emerging cults and unrest quite swiftly (according to the endings)." The ending slide literally says "showing no interest in worldly affairs" - Are you thinking of a different ending slide? Or a different quote? I honestly don't remember this being mentioned at all and can't find any reference to it. Cassandra also spent time in the Hunterhorn Mountains north of Orlais, where she worked to rebuild the Seekers. For a time, the new Seekers remained reclusive, showing no interest in worldly affairs and working to a purpose few outside their order could guess.
"Also, Friends of the Red Jenny are implied to operate throughout the entire Thedas and have quite a history (they've been mentioned since DA:O). So, for them not to be mentioned at all during the events makes no sense." They started as an organization based out of Ferelden and expanded to (areas that we know) Kirkwall, Orlais, Starkhaven, Tantervale, and Nevarra. They're not described as a powerful global organization. They're peppered throughout Thedas where they can get a foothold. We don't have proof or any mention of them being a thing in Tevinter or Antiva.
"Venatori should not even be a thing. Venatori rose to power only because of the Corypheus" The Venatori at their core are a cult of Tevinter-Mage Supremacists. That ideology doesn't just vanish or appear suddenly. The ideology is deeply rooted in the Tevinter Imperium. Even Dorian points out that many magisters still privately support the Venatori's ideas. While they won't outright sanction it. The Venatori's power increase may be directly tied to Corypheus but these ideologies have been present in Tevinter for a long ass time.
"So, at best there should be some Venatori cults present - but they won't be having that much power because they no longer have structure, they no longer have their god-magister, and they have nothing to sway magisters on their side - especially if they failed to provide any alternative to Corypheus in 10 years and went back to worshipping the Old Gods. [...] To make them the main problem is lazy writing." I don't think we need to get into a lesson on power vacuums here but let's just use the definition of "when someone in a place of power, has lost control of something and no one has replaced them." With Corypheus gone there is a power vacuum. A cult of fanatics don't just say "oh well, guess we'll go home now." According to Tevinter Nights (which the franchise being a mixed-media franchise has it's own problems), while a lot distanced themselves from the Venatori there were still a good number of loyalists who remained active. This leads to Aelia trying to fill in that role. She does gain a decent amount of support for it. Even when she's "captured" she has enough sway to escape prison and cause problems. Why? Because the Venatori's ideology is appealing to a lot of people in Tevinter even if they don't directly associate with the cult. However, with her "failure" we have another power vacuum present - so why is it "lazy writing" to have the emergence of another powerful mage that speaks like Corypheus and offer power similarly to what he did fill that?
"It makes no sense for the Venatori to be the main bad guys because the entire Tevinter fucking sucks already. It's has a horrible, hedonistic and power-obsessed ruling class where dominating the weak is considered good manners. Dorian should be having his hands full by fighting the entire Senate on such concepts as "slavery is bad" and "we should treat non-mages as people" - because Tevinter abhors change and its power is full of assholes like Aurelian Titus. The Venatori are just one shade of ugly the Tevinter has - and not the most prominent one." The supremacist ideology of the Venatori embody everything you're saying here. The examples you're giving are all part of the supremacist mindset. Hedonistic and power-obsessed ruling class? Yep. "Slavery is bad" and "we should treat non-mages as people" Those two concepts are directly against the supremacists ideology. We also do get some notes from Dorian doing just that Veilguard. The Venatori isn't just one shade of ugly, it's the embodiment of everything wrong in Tevinter. It's the supremacist ideology given form.
"Yes, it makes sense for Varric and Harding to take part in the search for Solas - but I can't believe that Rook at least hadn't been approved by the Inquisitor. and that Rook doesn't have means to contact the Inquisitor for further instructions in case something happens to Varric, or Harding or both of them. This is counter-productive." Varric is the one tasked with forming a small team. It's his responsibility to form that team and onboard people and vet them. With the way it's framed in "The Missing" Varric had full authority to bring on whoever. He didn't need approval. They kept in touch via Charter and sent correspondence to the Inquisitor but there wasn't any need for approval. Varric is the main path and Harding is the back up. That's 2 channels. Until the incident happens to Varric that seems standard. When the incident happens with Varric, then I believe Harding should have introduced Rook and the Inquisitor sooner to keep that practice of a back up channel open. Harding does reach out to Charter pretty early to inform them about what happened to Varric and mention Rook. I would have liked an Inquisitor meeting or letter sooner though.
I think below is where different interpretations come in.
"Solas knows how Leliana and Josephine operate, but that's not going to stop them - and it should not stop them when the fate of the world is at stake." You think they wouldn't let that stop them. I think they're smart enough to not continue to play an active part if any information they get or send off is information Solas is spoon feeding them. If their continued involvement would cause more harm then good then yea, I think they would take a step back. I think they would hand off the reigns to others.
"However, it's going to be insanely ha[r]d to prove the threat to anyone else and then tell them to go find Solas. At the same time, intentionally holding back information about what Solas really is means sending the "someone Solas doesn't know" to their death. They go after Solas, thinking it's just a really strong mage - and they don't know that it's actually an ancient god." Given Varric's line to Neve at the beginning, Varric is upfront with the information: "I also told you he was an ancient elven god." Whether the person believes them is dependent on the person. Rook has been tracking Solas with Varric for a year or so. I think by now they've witnessed enough to believe Varric's information.
"And she is going to stop now, after it's revealed that the threat isn't gone? There is no way she won't be an active participant. Even the fact that Seekers aren't welcome isn't going to stop her." I do actually think that the threat of severe political consequences should a southern religious military group make moves in a northern territory under a different religion would dissuade her. Cassandra isn't stupid. We also see her get less rash in Inquisition. We see her stop and think things through more. So actually, yes I do think that since mobilizing Seekers in Northern territory could at worse be seen as an act of war she would let it stop her. She even says at the end of trespasser "we need to be careful."
"Basically, it meant that the Inquisitor and their allies were going to try harder, learn what they can and find new resources, new information, any leverage possible. This is why the Inquisitor sets their course for Tevinter at the end of Trespasser: they were preparing to cooperate with a controversial state, pulling strings and calling favors, finding people with an ample knowledge of magic and ancient history that could assist them with finding any clues;"
L: "My agents have found nothing with the eluvians he could be anywhere"
C: [Dialogue about whether you disbanded or kept the Inquisition]
L: "We have what we truly need."
C: "We will need to be careful."
L: "Solas knows everything about us. Who we are. How we work. Our strengths and weaknesses"
Inky: "Then we find people he doesn't know." [Dialogue about if you are saving him or stopping him]
I do think this means they were going to find new allies and new people. Tevinter Imperium is a good place to start looking for that. And all this plays out through the comics and Harding and Varric's stories. (which again making the series Mixed-media has it's own complications) They do find new allies through their journey. They do find people who have ample knowledge of magic and ancient history. This idea also continues to play out in Veilguard. We find someone who has connections. We find someone who has ample knowledge of ancient magics and history. We find someone who has ample knowledge of the fade since that's what Solas was directly trying to manipulate.
I do not think it implicitly means what you've interpreted it to. I think that's how you interpreted that and I think that's a valid interpretation of it. Unfortunately that's not where they took it. That's also now how I interpreted it. I think a lot of the fandom interpreted this in different ways and that leads to disappointment if their interpretation wasn't correct. I think that's what's happening to you here. I don't think Bioware not catering to your interpretation means "they don't care." or anything like that. I think it's just that what you predicted or assumed based on the information provided ended up being incorrect. Other people predicted it correctly. If anything this just means that the marketing team could have done better at setting expectations and making sure everyone was on the same page.
oh my god that was a lot to type.
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I don't think the game is perfect by any standards (no game is). There are things I wish they could have included or flushed out more, but I don't think any of that was done by Bioware devs "not caring." I think the Bioware team does actually really love their world and lore of Dragon Age. To quote their artbook (which is actually insane to look at):
"Art books like this one are the perfect opportunity to showcase what you don't see in the finished product: the inspiration, the blueprints, the unused drafts. We barked up a lot of wrong trees. We explored some wild directions--some ending in dead ends, others ending in precious treasure. We also created a lot of material that we liked but didn't have the capacity to build (in this game, anyway)."
If Bioware truly didn't love and care for their world and lore, the artbook wouldn't be as beautiful and jam packed as it is. There wouldn't be other medias of the series: books, comics, animations, movies.
But Bioware can't just make whatever they want. Bioware is owned by EA (not just published through them. OWNED by them). Bioware has to pay people to make the games. They need to get the funding and approval from EA to do so. This means that no matter how passionate the team is, there's only so much they can do and EA gets a huge say in what that is. EA who explicitly stated earlier AFTER BG3 released that they don't think single player story based games are worth investing in. WHICH IS INSANE TO ME. EA had them start developing the game one way. EA had them change development midway. EA had them remove all multiplayer pieces. EA cut funding to Bioware forcing them to make cuts in staff.
I guess if we say that a lot of the post is us disagreeing on how things are interpreted and not a misunderstanding of the source material then I can say my main problem with posts like this is that it targets the developers. The developers do seem to really love and care for their world and do want to do more, but they can't do it all. They can't just do everything they want. They have a parent company constantly controlling what they can and can not do. I could agree with a lot more posts if they actually targeted the company causing a lot of the problems, EA - WHO WE ALL ALREADY KNOW IS A SHIT MONEY HUNGRY COMPANY. Instead of the Devs who busted their asses for 10 years wanting to do more and being told to change it or scrap it at every turn.
Bioware writing team has a comfy, sheltered life and it shows
I'm sorry, but how come that the only people Inquisitor sent to look for Solas were Varric and Harding? How come that the only people recruited in 10 years of pursuing Solas were Neve and Rook? Do the writers understand that this is NOT how a serious effort looks like?
What about Leliana? Divine or not, she is still Sister Nightingale with an immense spywork. You'd think she won't mobilize everything she has to track Solas and his followers?
What about Josephine? What, she decided "nah, I'm done" and didn't use any of her diplomatic talents and connections to let the Inquisitor's agents have access, permissions or information they need?
What about Dorian? As a political figure, you'd think he will be the first Minrathous contact for the Inquisitor allies, the one arranging things and providing insights?
What about Cassandra and her Seekers? Isn't she interested in stopping another world-ending threat?
What about Sera and her sabotaging potential? If she organized the group of people for performing vigilante acts, people who are her eyes and ears, how come nobody from her group is helping with the effort?
I get it why Varric takes part in it - he knew Solas, the Inquisitor trusts him and his judgement, but for the game to imply that all the responsibility was lumped on Varric's shoulders is fucking disgraceful. I get it writers, Varric is popular character, and you would use him as bait to your heart's content, but the context you've created implies that Varric might have been the only one to take the threat seriously, while the Inquisitor and the rest were doing God knows what.
Varric should have been handing the Rook information on all the contacts they can recruit, all the useful agents, all the people to work with, not tell them to ask Neve because she might know someone because detective (Neve is a good character, but the fact that people who were supposed to spend 10 years chasing Solas look up to her for finding them contacts is appalling).
"Oh, but all these people were in the previous parts and we don't want to mention previous parts because muh new players" - well, you shot yourselves in the foot. Maybe, just maybe, you should have AT LEAST cared more about the choices made in DAI.
Congrats.
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starrycassi · 13 hours ago
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VERY old and uncooked au I have where Viktor (and eventually jayce) end up working for Silco.
PART 1 - VIKTOR (childhood, adolescence, survival)
Singed actually takes the child in. Yeah I know Viktor technically HAS parents but we've never seen em in the show so I'm ignoring them
So Viktor now lives + works for singed. He gets over his morals real quick when faced with a fully equipped laboratory. He's a child, okay? He gets excited and is eventually groomed (I don't mean romantically, just like molded) by singed into agreeing + obeying all the things the older man tells him. Silco joins in on the part later and toys with his brain as best as he can
Singed uses him as a bargaining chip with Silco. An investment, if you will.
A bit of a "future promise" thing. Viktor actually agrees to this because he knows it's the best shot he's got. All the years living alongside Singed have made him into a more cynical/realistic person. He's 13 and already grumbles at "kids these days"
And Silco is an opportunistic man. He looks at this young, blooming genius and goes "yeah, why not? He is your problem, though. Have some money and make me a bomb"
Viktor also gets a pretty decent gun and shooting lessons. His aim is decent enough. He also hangs around sevika A LOT. He recognizes her as the strongest, safest individual if a fight breaks out and tells her ad much. She won't admit it but the praise feels good. She allows him to hover around and he helps her with small things like lighting hee cigarettes or refilling her flask. It's a symbiotic relationship where they both look at each other dead in the eye when someone is saying stupid shit.
So Viktor is like 15 and suddenly faced with even MORE power and recognition, even MORE fundings and accomodations.
This boy pours his life and time into making weapons. His dreams of being a scientist are slowly forgotten as both Singed and Silco effectively turn him into their perfect little genius.
They turn his desire to help against himself, telling him that the only way the under city will ever get better is if they go against piltover and win (which yeah I mean it kinda makes sense) and just general promises and such
Silco is genuinely surprised by how inventive the kid can be, and in return Viktor appreciates the man's offers and words for what it is: a trap he's wilfully walking in.
Silco does NOT feel any affection for the kid. At least not a lot more than he does for sevika or any other loyal worker. He is amused by his intelligence and somewhat entertained by his ideas. He seems Viktor as more of a small dog he's raising, expecting him to develop sharper and sharper fangs. He does care for Viktor in the "one of my youngest workers is more efficient and savvy than five of yours" way
Viktor doesn't feel any affection for Silco, either. He's a really down-to-earth kid, has lived in the fissures all his life and has been coached by singed into how to navigate the under city. He knows singed doesn't really trust the man and doesn't plan on doing so himself. He does love the opportunity he's given, but knows damn well that it's all done for a higher reason.
He does feel a connection with singed, though. It's mutual in a way. More of a mentor-mentee thing than any paternal/familiar relationship, but they're both satisfied with it. Singed respects Viktor and treats him as an equal, which also means he can a bit too harsh on what is essentially still a fragile teen.
They are protective of Viktor only in the way one is protective of their own gun
PART 2 - VIKTOR (last of his teen years, young adulthood, rage)
EVENTUALLY Viktor manages to worm his way into the academy (in the same way he did in canon) while hiding from Silco, Singed and Sevika, and is, instead, rejected. Heimerdinger is too weary of Viktor and his general attitude (for a good reason) and plans on having him interrogated. When he tries to get Viktor to walk alone into a room with him, Viktor panics and starts stuttering out explanations. He knows his position in the under city is conditional. Knows the leash that Silco has around him. The academy could be his safe haven and now he's losing it.
Heimerdinger does his best to try and calm him down, however, every word he says makes the situation worse. He's so clearly out of touch, promising things that could never be done.
Viktor is under a lot of pressure and just starts spiraling. Everything the yordle says makes things worse and worse. The commotion calls the school guards attention and Viktor gets almost thrown in jail, all while heimerdinger tries to tell the guards to let him go. Viktor eventually manages to sneak out but fucks his leg up even more in the process.
He returns "home" and, refusing to cry for such a thing, turns his sadness into bright, burning indignation. Silco might be an idiot, he realizes, but he's right about some things. He burns down the uniform after ripping it into shreds.
After all of this, he abandons any dream of ever getting out. Singed looks at him knowingly, tells him that sneaking around is a fine art he hasn't mastered yet, and leaves. Silco welcomes him back with a satisfied smile, and a "see, boy? I was right"
Silco isn't killing Viktor for his betrayal because he smells the heartbreak and KNOWS that this is the time to attack if he wants that boy to be on his side for the rest of his life. Sevika isn't even mad. Just kinda disappointed.
And it WORKS. Viktor is devastated and isolated, and Silco effectively positions himself as the only current logical option. Viktor knows that this is all a shit show but decides that there's nothing to lose by working for the biggest kingpin on the city
Years go by, Viktor becomes part of silco's inner gang. He develops what could be seen as a friendship with sevika. They drink together every so often, trash-talking the rest of the henchmen in hushed whispers in between assignments. She tries to give him life advice in cryptic ways. He kinda gets it. Most of the time.
He's also a bit of a slut. I mean he's young, hot, kinda part of Zaun's elite, smart... yeah he's getting around. This part is important I swear. No it's not I just want Viktor to get it on. He's constantly sneaking pretty boys in and out of wherever he's staying at that week (idk where the fuck sevika sleeps. Do silco's henchmen just sleep in his house??? Does he provide apartments?? I need to know)
People in the under city actually start *talking* to Viktor as he gets older, realizing that he's a bit less violent than the rest of silco's thugs. This is always weird to him but he endures it for the sake of staying on top of what's being said in the city.
He buys from benzo frequently, and Benzo tolerates him because once, very slowly and in a hushes tone, he heard Viktor tell Ekko to never work for anyone with a shark aquarium.
PART THREE - MEETING JAYCE.
He's in the very same shop when he meets jayce.
He goes "yeah I could get him to suck me off probably" and tries to approach
And then jayce pays in GOLD and DOESN'T HAGGLE
And he realizes that this idiot is a piltie. He also realizes that whatever the fuck he just bought could've been useful for him and silco will not like it if a PILTIE out of everyone takes them. He literally gets in between him and the door with absolutely no idea of what he's going to do (there is absolutely no way he's upping that payment sorry silco you are no match for the Kirammans)
There is no time and he defaults to "oh this is my bedroom" mode.
Cue him saying something like "I've never seen such a pretty face in this store. Are you from around here, darling?"
Ekko is gagging in the background.
They flirt yada yada I have the scene but it's too long to write here. U get the idea. I'd anyone wants to read that ask me but for now just use your imagination
Viktor offers Jayce to come back with him to his house. Ask this is happening the kids are staging the heist.
They make out a bit, Jayce tells Viktor all about his theory (which is arguably hotter for Viktor) and shows him his notes (because obviously he carries his journal with him)
Viktor is BLOWN AWAY by this. He gets all worked up. Never felt this horny before. They discuss for a while, and Viktor decides that THIS is something he can stand behind. Actual discoveries, not just drawing blueprints after blueprint of the same fucking thing
Really how many ways can one design a weapon in
Anyways
Viktor sort of mildly drugs jayce and steals three of the shiny orbs and then wakes Jayce up and tells him that this was delightful and such.
PART FOUR - Hey Silco Can We Adopt This Boy. For Science
The heist happens the very same way. Viktor hears about it, about the trial, and decides that all these years of work should get him some privileges
He has his very first actual fight with Silco and Singed about it, but they eventually and very reluctantly agreed to give him two bodyguards so he can go play prince and break jayce out of jail.
Silco knows that even a worm will turn. If Jayce does agree to work for them, then they get another good worker. If not, they can always kill him. He's never heard Viktor this adamant about someone before, and damn he's seen the boy walk around with some pretty faces. Maybe this Jayce fella truly is smart.
Viktor breaks jayce out do NOT ask me how #thepoweroflove or whatever. The henchmen get to punch enforcers so they're happy about it.
The "am I interrupting?" Scene happens. It's also too long so.
It takes Viktor a while to convince Jayce to, yk, betray his country and leave everything he's ever known behind, but Jayce was literally about to kill himself and Viktor is talking about change and help and people who actually need it (lies) and he looks so beautiful under the moonlight and he remembered him. So. Really what can one realistically do in this situation if not agree.
They rush back, Jayce leaves a hasty suicide note and says he will drown himself in the river, they break into heimerdinger's room via breaking down the fucking door, steal all the equipment they can carry (henchmen & co brought some bags okay??)
When Mel arrives they're gone. She calls for the guards to come but they're long gone (there might be a motorcycle involved. Cyclists Viktor... Yeah)
PART FIVE - JINX AND JAYCE
Viktor shows up and finds out that silco has adopted a child. Also Sevika doesn't have an arm. Also Vander is dead. So is Benzo. Which is a bummer.
Jayce hates everything that's going on around him buts this man is SUICIDAL he's just kinda going with the flow. Having him gives Viktor his backbone and morals back. Slowly. Ver slowly.
Hextech develops WAY slower. Like they're working in a drug den there's absolutely no way there's the same conditions. They're doing their best though.
Jayce Is actually really impressed by shimmer and how it can "help" people. He's gaslighting himself ATP and everyone else is enabling him.
Also eventually Silco also gives Viktor a laced brace that makes him mildly addicted to shimmer. Viktor is clever enough to realize what's going on but also experienced enough to know that refusal would be seen as an offense. He takes the brace on and off with his own prototypes. Sevika and him both know they're just digging themselves into a deeper hole.
Silco actually tries to kill jayce one because he was getting too fucking annoying, but Jinx steps in. He reminds him of claggor (in a way). She claims that they're both her friends and silco just seethes in silence.
They help raise her. Kinda.
I wrote all of this so I could successfully say that they have a tea party with jer
THEY LOVE LIL JINX OKAAY. Specially jayce. He takes all his emptiness and tries to fill it with love for her and Viktor, the only two people he feels are kind of honest to him
Also Jayce being jealous of the fact that Viktor got around, specially when he has the audacity to give powder boy's advice (sevika is a STONE TOP LESBIAN you can NOT tell me anything else) right in Jayce's face. Yeah. Miscommunication. Falling in love. Devotion and guilt. Feelings of owing. Hesitant kisses and never said words. YEEES. I know it's a bit tropey but I like it so. Yeah.
Also both Jayce and Vik have long hair. Jinx insisted they let it grow like hers. Jayce's actually reaches his shoulder plates/mid back while Viktor keeps it shoulder length, just long enough to tie it. I think. Still haven't decided since long hair Jayce is too hard to mentally picture but I know he would look GOOD
Yes this also means that Jayce and Vi meet even earlier. They take a look at each other as they both try to calm down jinx and Become Best Friends™
Caitlyn always has a heart attack because YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO BE DEAD. She, like Vi, goes "yeah silco is definitely keeping my sister/brother captive" and they're both like You Will Not Believe This.
Viktor doesn't join them in their adventures because he is Not jumping around the roofs. He uses a cane. Leave him alone jinx no he can't climb the stupid ass tower.
Jinx and Jayce become a sort of "ground control" thing. Jayce is BUFFED that man can stand his own in a fight. He's not as quick or flexible but he makes up for it in pure absolute brawn. They're not actually doing anything useful they're just entertaining Jinx every so often.
Idk guys this au is consuming my brain.
I have more ideas but this was way too long already
If u read this far u can actually ask for a small scene on the au or add an idea and I'll write it for u
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anxi04 · 5 hours ago
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Tim admits this was… definitely a bad idea. But in his defense he could not be blamed for anything he decides after an intense case. He stayed up for a consecutive 74 hours and then crashed for 2 days straight so… really it's Kon's fault for taking the suggestion seriously.
Tim and Kon are at Olive Garden on a small date, nothing too serious. However like the fool Tim is he's disguised so he doesn't get recognized as 'Timothy Jackson Drake' or 'Tim Wayne' and since he's still very out of it at the moment he's not really putting much of a mask on so the confidence is gone, and he's still so tired so the comprehension is a little… off right now.
He forgot about the dreaded 'how much Parmesan do you want' question for dishes and after a minute it just got too awkward to say anything. So here they are, Tim dying inside while the waiter (who's definitely a meta cause where the hell is all that cheese coming from?) grates the 5th block of Parmesan. Kon is laughing the traitor that he is and at this point it's also a little bit of a challenge on his and the waiters end.
"Is this good enough for your exquisite tastes?" The waiter, Lora (god they are getting a minimum of a 500$ tip), asks him very pointedly while looking directly in his eyes and aggressively grating.
Tim can feel an angel and demon on his shoulder. 'More! A mountain of cheese! All the cheese in the restaurant!' is what his angel is saying. The demon is… cruel in the way they want cheese.
God maybe Tim should've stayed asleep. He stares the waiter in the eyes (uncomfortable but he's had to look Becca directly in her beady eyes and tell her that her ex-husband was wrong for leaving. Tim gave said husband the courage to leave. This is nothing.) and makes a 'go on' gesture.
Tim blinks and suddenly three feet have been added to the height of the cheese mountain and holy shit. Using powers for the most petty reason is 100% what he would do. He respects Lora so much right now.
"Tim.. Hon… You're lactose intolerant that is way more than enough." Once Kon was able to get his breath back he tries putting an end to this madness but Tim is committed. So is Lora, if the way her eyes dart over to Kon in a challenge is any indication.
"No. Lactose intolerance is a weakness and I will train it out." Why is he not backing out oh god what the fuck is he thinking.
"Oh, would you like more help with that? We have some more… brutal cheeses for lactose intolerance. I can grab some mozzarella, or brie, or any other soft cheeses." Oh my god. Tim's gonna die here. He's gonna die cause he's too stubborn. Although he respects the hell out of Lora right now. He's entertaining the idea of her becoming a hero. Or villain. Either would fit.
Anyway. That sounds like a challenge, and Tim doesn't back down from challenges like that. "That would be wonderful, thank you." Eye contact has not been broken. Janet would be proud of him.
Eventually there is a 10 foot tall mountain of cheese on his plate and a ladder next to the table. And now he'd feel like a dick if he doesn't eat it all but also holy fuck he is severely lactose intolerant.
Kon's head is making a dent in the table. Tim will fully understand if Kon needs a break after this.
He can see Lora blatantly staring him down from across the restaurant and well that's just another fucking challenge.
Slowly, (but not too slowly, no that would be showing weakness) he finishes the plate. And honestly he completely forgot what he had originally ordered until he got to the bottom of it and by then it was just such a cheesy mess he can't even tell if it was supposed to be spaghetti or some version of American Alfredo. He eats it anyway.
Lora comes over soon after, fake smile barely hiding fury, and asks if he wants seconds. It's a challenge and Tim doesn't refuse challenges… but Tim is also not dumb and so he declines. He swears he sees disappointment in her eyes.
She lets him pay the bill and tip her (looking at him slightly when he gives her a thousand dollars, which causes him to put down another thousand in her hand) and soon after they're set to leave.
Tim does however hear her say something about using the money to put little rockets on a skateboard instead of something useless like rent and honestly? Tim might have found his best civilian (for now) friend.
They leave Olive Garden 2,043$ less rich (not really) and Tim with a new contact and a promise to personally build her a skateboard that easily reaches 90 mph.
He's praying no one recognized him and he won't wake up to the news calling him out. He could never live it down.
(He was in fact recognized, but by one of the Bat-Clan and when he opens his bedroom there is an absurd amount of cheese everywhere. He blames Jason.)
(It was Damian.)
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kalinara · 2 days ago
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(All-New X-Men #6)
I've kind of blogged something about this before but I never get tired of seeing posts about Logan/Scott/Jean as a throuple (I will literally die of spite before I use a portmanteau) that talk about them as two godlike, immortal beings and "just some guy".
Because on some level, of course, it's absolutely true. Jean is the living embodiment of a Universal Cosmic Force. She can sneeze and wipe out entire star systems.
And Logan is basically immortal. There are a good number of timelines that go forward hundreds, if not thousands of years (see: Powers of X in the Krakoa era) that still show Logan at the prime of his life, always fighting and surviving.
Scott, is, by that standard, just some guy. He's got lasers coming out of his eyes, which is kind of cool admittedly. You could do some interesting analysis on the fact that they seem to be infinite - the only time we see them give out is when HE gives out. Or doesn't get enough sunlight or whatever. But for practical purposes, they've got one real use, the guy's just a very decorative portable cannon.
But what makes Scott special, and on level with the other two, isn't what he is, but what he does.
This is a dude who's led the X-Men since he was a teenager. And as a teenager once talked an entire fleet of Sentinels into attacking the goddamn sun.
This is a dude who co-led a guerilla war against Apocalypse in the future for 10-12 years (admittedly with his goddess wife), then came back as though nothing happened.
He's also the reason for his own last name, because in ANOTHER time traveling bout with the goddess wife, he managed to inspire his own orphaned ancestor to take the name "Summers" in his and Jean's honor.
This is a dude who got possessed by Apocalypse, and repressed him to the point of amnesia, got a sliver of the Void stuck in his head, and repressed that too. Even Phoenix possession took a while to shake that guy.
This is a dude who became the "Boy King of Utopia", uniting the entirety of the mutant race under one banner. Magneto KNELT to him and named him Caesar.
There's also that time he stared down Dracula. Was it a bluff? Dracula thinks so. But he still backed the fuck down. And for a brief period of time, even Namor followed this guy's lead. NAMOR.
This is a dude who, after becoming possessed and ostracized, led a "mutant revolution", becoming a household name among bitter college students everywhere.
He's the kangaroo trial symbol of the entire mutant race, sentenced to death, and his only response is a call to arms published through his lawyer, She-Hulk.
This is a man who's slept with Jean Grey, the Phoenix (back when they were considered separate entities), the Goblin Queen, Emma Frost, and Frenzy, and every single one came back wanting to fuck him again.
Speaking of Frenzy? That dude's sub game redeemed a fucking acolyte!
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"God took less time than that to make the world!". Okay, take a fucking breath, Joanna. (X-Men Legacy #248)
His kids are practically gods in their own right, and he was only involved in the conception of one of them. The others just kind of showed up one day with a DNA test and got invited in for dinner.
The closest thing he has to a hobby is plotting how to kill dinosaurs:
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(Uncanny X-Men #495 - and he's fought a LOT of dinosaurs.
Sinister's been obsessed with this man's DNA for years, and yeah, if you're just looking at it in terms of powers, it doesn't make a lot of sense. There are much more powerful mutants out there after all. But when you start thinking about the rest of this, yeah, I kind of want to put him in a petrie dish too.
Heck, he's even argued with the narrator! In another timeline, he could have become an incredibly boring variation of Deadpool!
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(Uncanny X-Men #96).
I'm just saying, yes, by one point of view the Moon Throuple is two godlike immortal beings and dude who is "just some guy".
But on the other hand, if you had a chance to fuck the unholy combination of Mr. Rogers, Alexander the Great, and the Death Star wouldn't you?
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chaos-of-the-abyss · 2 days ago
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i mean, i definitely don't disagree that beren and luthien -- and the rest of the lotr universe if we're being honest -- is full of misogyny and sexism. from the characters to the settings to a good part of the messaging, all of it operates from a patriarchal worldview that reflects the mindset of its writer. everyone who reads tolkien's works should be aware of that and it's absolutely fair to criticize it. (though i will say: a trend i've noticed in fandom is criticizing that the misogyny only in the characters/stories one dislikes and wants to prove as "bad," while ignoring it in others.)
i don't think your particular criticism (that luthien should have easily been able to take on celegorm and curufin, and they never should have posed a threat to her) works with what we're given in-story though. luthien is never presented as "powerful" in the typical action-hero sense. it's perseverance, guile, cleverness, and sheer nerve that pulls her through against sauron and morgoth, not physical power. i also don't think it's quite accurate to reduce celegorm and curufin to random dudes. those two are, if not war veterans, certainly battle-experienced by the time of beren and luthien, and they've seen and been involved in a lot of fighting: the first kinslaying (albeit their side was much better armed than their opponents and received reinforcements from fingon), the initial skirmishes of the exilic noldor with morgoth's forces upon their arrival in beleriand, and the dagor bragollach. i believe in some versions they also help cover orodreth's retreat from minas tirith, which similarly suggests some type of military involvement. and i'm absolutely not going to be the person that goes "uwu let female characters be feminine!!1!!11!" -- the argument can, and should, be made that we should get more female warriors in the lotr verse. that's definitely one of my main frustrations; of course we have women like eowyn, haleth, and emeldir, all of whom we know can fight -- but i could always use more female warriors (and more gnc women period) in my fiction. however, in frame of what we know about luthien as she is canonically, the idea that she should have been able to easily overpower celegorm and curufin doesn't hold up.
regarding her putting morgoth to sleep, what we need to keep in mind is that luthien tricks him first, and tells him she wants to sing to him as a minstrel. then it's morgoth's own arrogance and his indulgence of his desire to corrupt luthien that keeps him from noticing her true intentions, giving her the window of opportunity to put him to sleep. she didn't just open the act by immediately sedating him, and i don't think she could have. her magic doesn't allow her to just put people to sleep willy-nilly; the circumstances have to be right, or it has to be one of those moments of, for lack of a better way to put it, cosmic intervention (like when she put carcharoth to sleep). none of that was the case for when she met celegorm and curufin. what i'm trying to say is, despite how she's perceived (often along with resounding complaints about how she's such a "mary sue"), luthien is not an untouchable powerful demigod with a track record of easily kicking aside everyone that gets in her way. many of her antagonists far outclass her in terms of "might". but she's brave, confident enough in herself that she believes she can pull off what everyone else tells her is impossible, and resourceful and astute enough to optimize what she has going for her to her best advantage despite the odds being stacked against her -- and that's ultimately why she succeeds. which was part of tolkien's intention, imo, as it fits best with the lotr verse's themes: it's not the "big," "powerful," people that pull off the most spectacular feats. it's the people who have estel, who don't give in to despair, who have the courage and tenacity that so many others don't.
also, regarding the "enchantment" idea: another reason it puts a bad taste in my mouth is that nowhere is any magic in the legendarium ascribed the ability to make people fall in love/lust with the user. even morgoth, the most powerful of the valar, can't do that; there's simply no reason to think that luthien should be able to. and i do understand wanting to explore her character more beyond her story with beren, but forcibly shoehorning her into a position -- against all indications given in the narrative about her, about celegorm and curufin, about the extent to which magic in the universe is capable of influencing someone -- in which she's the one at fault for a male character trying to sexually assault her is not the way to go about that. to be frank, the whole concept of making female characters who by all accounts in the source material are perfectly decent people, ~more morally grey~ because it's ~feminist~, particularly when the process of doing so exonerates a male character for his sexually predatory behavior toward her, and in the case with luthien, flips the situation so that she becomes the predatory one... i don't think it's feminist in the least. there are better ways to give female characters more agency and depth beyond their male love interests than making contrived scenarios in which she becomes responsible for the actions of men who victimize her
as blatantly misogynistic as the "luthien enchanted celegorm" theory/headcanon/whatever they call it is, i do think an interesting concept is a celegorm who convinces himself that luthien enchanted him to explain his own abhorrent behavior, because even he can't quite accept how low he's gone -- i.e. he tells himself that the lust and desire to possess luthien that at least significantly motivated his actions toward her was a result of some maiarin enchantment on her part. it doesn't quite align with my personal reading of the character (though it's not wholly incompatible with it either), but celegorm with his own hellfire-adjacent musical number would be a hell of an aesthetic
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tentacleplains · 28 days ago
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more scenes that basically everyone sees but pointing out a specific detail i find interesting: "though i hope you don't cause a scene this time" does avery regularly cause scenes at parties?? lmao
#original post#citations#avery#i don't need to maintag any of this this is just for me. a tumblr is a diary first and foremost#i really need to start actually paying attention on avery's dates so i can better understand what her deal is. like i get the gist#but i like to know specifics. which is obvious if you scroll thru this blog for thirty seconds. also she doesn't tell us what her job is!#“businessperson” is vague#it pays enough for her to be a sugar mommy and for (gestures to the post-school helicopter scene) but her actual social standing#seems. unstable. like girlie is NOT secure in her position. i guess this contributes to why i find f!avery more interesting than m!avery#she's very intentionally being shallow and looks-based by toting around this pretty young thing on all these damn Events she gets invited t#and obviously she seeks power over money because if it was just the money she wouldn't bother suger mama-ing us#also. we're not special to her. she finds another young thing if we piss her off too much. like i said it's looks-based it's playing to#the people in power she wants to impress (and subsequently become)#AND DESPITE HER “APPEARANCES ABOVE ALL ELSE” NATURE she has anger issues <3 which obvi looks bad if you're flying into a rage in public!#looks bad if you're being violent towards the pretty thing young enough to be your kid who you're toting around like a trophy!#and back to the subject matter: causing scenes at parties does not endear you to anyone either girlie#she really wants to be one of the wealthy powerful socialites who has everyone under their command but she can't even rein in HERSELF#let alone her orphan of the week. my failwife <3
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hauntingblue · 20 days ago
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WE STILL GOT ARCANEEEEE
#ambessa saying mel is safer as their enemy..... OOF we are going to get her side of the story this season#one thing i dont like is that they are really hauling ass in the first episode like damn. cait and vi are too quickly on the way to raid imo#i cannot velieve my fucking eyes..... vi dropping her gauntlets to keep kissing akdhaksjsk and OF COURSE cait is the one to do it OF COURSE!#were is thay gif of the butch watching football and raising her fist bc they scored that is me right now aldjsksnsl#vi saying please dont change bc she is seeing the signs is so AJDHAKSJK the break up will end lives..... i see why vi becomes an alcoholic#salo and cait wlw mlm hostility for reals#ambessa seeing cait as a rival the second she does her job and uses her military power.... yeah bc she has a real goal not just power grab#jayce fucking up vi and cait by messing with the arcane omg they are IN DANGER!!! JAYCE STOP FUCKING UUUP!!!!#OH MY GOD CAITLYN!!!!! HITTING VI ENOUGH FOR HER TO CRY OH MY GOOOOOD!!!#THERE IS JUST SO MUCH AKDJSKSKAL THE CHILD!!!! JINX GOT A NEW SISTER NOW VI GOODBYE#also vi wasnt going to kill her and jinx told the child to stop.... the only person there willing was cait and look at her.....#also sevika vs cait.... oof.... and jinx fighting vi BARE FISTED!!! GIRL!!!!#what can i fucking say like god.... “is her blood through your veins” “i thought you were different”#jinx is right i hope they got to you know before all of this akdjaksjsk.... christ#also amazing how vi told cait to don't change and she did it 10 minutes later.... girl you are in for it...#i think they just dont understand each other yet but they are in such a situation that they keep changing every 2 minutes so they never do#does that make sense loke ofc cait changed when her mother died and vi did too bc she accepted that her sister was gone#so in a way cait changed and vi stayed the same.... cait liked her “change” but vi did not like cait#ambessa bringing caitlyn to.be a general oh my gooooood her stress is going to get thru the roof like she doesn't have enough to deal with#its bc she knows she can control her... of course she offered her army to her.... and she doesn't mind putting her in danger#AND SHE DID ORCHESTRATE THE ATTACK!!!! OOOF#MEL PLEASEEEE TALK TO CAITLYN PLEASEEEE#like of course she disappears RIGHT NOW!!!#my god... also vis drinking buddy has left too.... of course.... you're good man....#talking tag#watching arcane#watching arcane season 2
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butnobodycame627 · 2 months ago
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why didn't peridot stay disabled… it would've added to their whole message of being different being okay and diversity and…. sigh….
#she didn't have magic in a magic-oriented society and used limb enhancers as a disability aid…#but they immediately threw out her limb enhancers because they posed a threat to them I guess#and then they gave peridot metal powers anyway#sorry I'm thinking thoughts.#su does a lot of things really well I very much admire it's queer rep and interesting storyline and mental health commentary etc#but the thing it does quite poorly imo is disability rep. at least when it comes to physical disabilities#and this is also a problem with steven's healing powers#while I understand he has diamond powers which means he's going to have quite strong abilities#I think healing powers have to have some limitations or else you're implying that disabilities can be cured#which is a very uncomfortable concept#steven cures connie’s eyesight without knowing he even can (and without her permission ofc)#which I feel at least implies he can cure blindness#and he cures literal death so I don't think there are Any limitations?#which is frustrating#sigh…#don't get me wrong I love this show#I just. I want disability rep I don't see enough good disability rep#I love toh forever for giving me the clawthornes because hello chronically ill characters I love seeing myself in you 🥹#anyway if I ever make art of peridot someday I'm gonna try to remember she deserves new limb enhancers or something.#or if I make a human peridot I'll give her prosthetics or some kind of mobility aid because! she deserves it I love her#you know what I'm thinking of kid cosmic too why doesn't chuck get a new translator or a wheelchair#bro said it hurts to speak english and he literally does not have legs get this man some disability aids PLEASE
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disillusionedjudge · 8 months ago
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{Hero Archetypes: The More... something version}
The Fallen Hero You are the Fallen Hero, a tragic embodiment of betrayal, vengeance, or perhaps a heart-wrenching love story turned awry. Whether exposed to corrupting influences, manipulated by deal-makers, brainwashed, extorted, blackmailed, or witnessing the destruction of sacred bonds, your descent into darkness is marked by profound sorrow and loss. You might have turned for the sake of greed. Yet within, a lingering spark of hope remains, compelling you to reluctantly extend assistance to the newcomers. Motivated by the sincere desire to shield them from the same tragic fate you endured, you find yourself driven to guide and protect, despite the shadows of your own past.
tagged by: @tarnishedxknight tagging: anyone!!
#quiz#((*taps fingers together* I have;;; thoughts on this#so this isn't. quite accurate for Gylfie as she does have morals and does act for what is good#which is going against Vayne and fighting for all of Ivalice instead of continuing to blindly go with Archadia's expansion#because she knows Vayne will destroy Ivalice in his constant need for power and Archadia will devour herself before she's full#so Gylfie never fell in the sense of turning on what is right and following Vayne without question#or continuing to believe that it was the destiny of the Empire to conquer all#with that all said - I can see her having a corruption arc and I think that'd be fun to explore heh#but also this is accurate with how Gylfie sees *herself*#I really should write a post about this at some point lol#but Gylfie doesn't believe herself to be a good person whatsoever. She used to believe Archadia was the best of the best for *years*#and felt it appropriate for the Empire she loved so much to continue her expansion and that Rozarria was 100% the enemy#and... never thought twice about the smaller kingdoms caught in the warpath#her mother's criticism of Archadia slowly began to chip at that but she wasn't disillusioned until Nabudis because *that*#was something she absolutely couldn't get behind no matter how she felt about the Empire. it was a horrific and brutal act that greatly#disturbed her and really snapped her out of it#also Ffamran leaving did make her start to question things a bit but not quite enough#anyway my point is: Gylfie doesn't believe herself to be a good person. she believes herself to be a *product* of war#to be too much like her father to be a good person#and that she's done so much harm that there is no room for her to be good#with that said she doesn't necessarily see herself as a horrible person but. definitely not a good one#and ABSOLUTELY doesn't see herself as *any* kind of hero - she'd honestly just laugh if someone called her one#but she had been brainwashed essentially and she had witnessed destruction of sacred bonds#and she has acted selfishly and she has done horrible things in the name of the Empire#but she also tries so hard to do *right* despite it all. she *wants* Archadia to be better#she *wants* Ivalice to remain whole and she does what she can to see Vayne defeated and Archadia changed for the better#her goal of becoming Judge Magister changes from her believing it was her birthright to her wanting to be one to make sure Archadia#stays on track and continues to do better under Larsa's rule because she knows he'll make the Empire *better*#and she's willing to do whatever she can to protect him and protect Archadia's future#but with that she may have to do things that wouldn't necessarily be considered *good*
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nataliedecorsair · 14 days ago
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I wanted to give you some of Pticenoga's Borderlands AU backstory, how she was raised by Shade and before starting her shenanigans with Vaughn.
Plus a bonus comic about how she decided to set up a meeting for Vaughn and Shade, but didn't tell Vaughn who is supposed to be there x) Mostly because Vaughn has met Shade before in his macabre World of Curiosities museum and thought that Shade is too weird for him. Well, that's the kind of person that would raise a feral harpy siren, gotta deal with it!
When she was very young, nothing bothered her much as she was just a wild baby exploring the world x) And Shade was a good father figure to her. However, as she grew older, she realized that she doesn't really "fit in": yeah, Pandora is a crazy planet, but not every person there is crazy. There are plenty of "regular folk" like Shade or other people from their town - and many others. And she was frequently called a monster, a mutant and many other things by the regular kids and even adults. She was wild though, could bite them or fight with them in a pretty feral manner, and, even though she protected herself, it didn't help the situation much. She wasn't crazy enough (and too small) to fit in with the psychos or bandits, was "too human" for actual monsters living on Pandora, and for a long time she had no idea she was a Siren, as even for Sirens she looked too different. Only when she hit her teens, she was able to confirm that she is one, started using her powers, and in her human form she could see the full extension of the glowing pattern she had on her skin. She still, however, didn't know why she wasn't born "normal", and there were no older Sirens around.
At some point, she decided to become independent and live on her own. Her "wild" upbringing was helping that a lot, and she felt fine being away from people. She'd still visit Shade frequently, of course, and at some point she'd even met Zer0 and could hang out with him for some time. As Zer0 is a mystery himself, they had some common ground between them (though constantly listening to his haiku were exhausting xD). Sadly, Vault Hunters attract attention, not always positive, and that was the reason why she got spotted by a big bandit gang (could be the beginning of Vallory's gang, but before she took over). And local scientists like Tannis already declared that there may be some connection between Sirens and the Vaults. And they noticed that she's a Siren, but also pretty young (and dumb). After the first Vault on Pandora was opened, there was plenty of weird and valuable stuff around, but it wasn't so easy to get it when you're just regular bandits. And when Eridians, the aliens that are guarding the Vault, are everywhere. The Sirens like Lilith were too strong for them, and hiring a Vault Hunter is expensive, so they decided to wriggle into her favor and use her to gain access to the area. She didn't know she was dealing with bandits first, she naively thought it's a rare case of nice fellows just wanting to be friends and such, plus the Vault could have answers about her origin, and the new "friends" confirmed it.
At some point, she realized she was being used, and got into a fight with the bandits - and lost, as there were too many of them, and she had too little experience, and they knew about Shade. She got kidnapped and told that she'd do everything they told her to do, or they'd kill Shade, so she had to obey. She helped them to fight the way to the Vault and get some of the riches, and during the process she felt that she really does have a connection with Eridians - they boosted her powers and helped her to get free, and kill every presenting member of the gang. She was worried about Shade though, so she left immediately to find him before the remaining members found out what happened and could harm him. But she was too late - the water source in their town of Oasis was poisoned, and every single person there died. Except Shade though - he lasted longer, but dehydration made him insane, and he turned corpses into the stuffed dummies he could talk to (though she didn't have much of a problem with this part). As she was gone for at least several months, he didn't believe she's real, and she had to adapt to the new reality.
She never got back to the Vault after that as she felt it was a source of more trouble than anything good (in her view, the price was too much for a bunch of physical stuff).
That lasted for years, and became a bit easier as her powers, enhanced by the Eridians, wasn't only serving the destruction,  but could eventually "heal" some part of Shade's mind, so the moments of clarity became more frequent (she didn't know it's the reason, though). And you still need money, whether you like it or not, so, when Shade decided to use his World of Curiosities as a spot of illegal deals and smuggling, she didn't resist, but would watch over him in the shadows in case something goes wrong.
Eventually, she calmed down and just embraced herself. And, after some time, she met Vaughn, whose personal struggles she could sense right away, as she had to experience "being different" herself.
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rucow · 1 year ago
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having jas (my tes oc who is nerevar's and voryn's daughter) be a direct rival of almalexia is funny bc they both Hate each other and want to throttle one another but they can't. they need to uphold their public image so the only battles they fight are political debates and throwing shade at one another. if they ever get locked in a room together, at least one of them will end up Dead
#the girlbosses are fighting#ayem should be like jas' step-aunt or something like that 😭 but instead they end up being two very intense and ambitious women#who would do Anything to achieve their goals (in jas' case) or to maintain their image and power (in ayem's case)#id be scared to put them in a room together 😭 thankfully they both have enough self control to not jump at each other's throats in public#jas uses her heritage (being nerevar's daughter) against almalexia at any chance she gets#she will never miss an opportunity to let the good people of morrowind know that She Is Nerevar's Heir and morrowind's Rightful Ruler#she puts on such a grand and benevolent image just to gain the support of the dunmer people#but in reality she just wants revenge for her House and for her PARENTS#she was a child when nerevar and voryn were killed . goodness knows she feels she has every right to go berserk on the tribunal#jas is a fun character bc she doesn't serve Anyone but herself. she doesnt even serve azura though azura tried to gain jas' loyalty#in the same way she had nerevar's undying loyalty and servitude#but jas isn't nerevar. she's much more rebellious and she tries to hold the reins of fate in her own hands#she won't accept the nerevarine prophecy and she won't accept the tribunal going unpunished and she wont accept her House being erased#she is so so ambitious. and so so strong. and so very unforgiving#she's not evil. she's just a firestorm of a woman who wants justice. she wants the tribunal to admit what theyve done. publicly#she knows that if she can expose the tribunal she Will gain the trust & support of the dunmer people & she Will get the position she seeks#whether or not she succeeds remains to be seen........ i believe in her. but where's the fun in a story with a perfect ending?#her story will have a bloody end thats for sure. but it wont be her own blood. it'll be the blood of everyone loyal to her#who have sacrificed themselves for jas' cause#jas is JUST like nerevar but worse. much worse#and i love her#shes amazing and powerful and knows how to manipulate politics sooo well 💞💞💞#i luv her
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sunderwight · 4 months ago
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Bingqiu AU where Luo Binghe's the chosen village sacrifice to the evil deity who lives up the mountain.
Normally the village sends maidens, but they've more or less run out of expendable girls of the right age and, ahem, "virtues". So of course Luo Binghe's early life bad luck kicks in. In the wake of his mother's death there's no one to really care about what happens to him, he's fairly pretty, and the village leaders decide that if they dress him up like a girl the teenaged homeless kid should pass well enough. And hey, y'know, he's probably got a hard life ahead for him anyway -- dying in a brothel of some venereal disease or on the streets of exposure or starvation. At least as a sacrifice, everyone else gets to benefit from his loss! And the kid will get added to a shrine and be remembered as a hero! If anything, he should be happy about this!
Binghe is not happy about this.
But he's also a skinny underfed nobody who is easily overpowered, dressed up like a bride, and tied to a post. So. Not much he can do but wait for the evil deity to come and do whatever horrible thing he's gonna do to him.
Meanwhile, Shen Yuan is pretty sure he's been isekai'd into the over-powered hero of some kind of supernatural adventure story? He's not totally sure because he doesn't recognize the setting, but the signs are there. He's got a shrine-like base of operations (though it seems to have become corrupted/ruined, probably he has to restore it somehow), he has a very resilient and handsome new body with spiritual energy of some kind flowing through him, and a very clearly magical sword. Plus lots of neat starter powers! Though it feels like he has other abilities that have been blocked somehow? Probably he has to level up in order to access them.
When he treks out of his "base" and finds what seems to be a distressed maiden, he takes it for his beginner hero mission. The girl claims that she's been doomed to be sacrificed to an evil god. That sounds a little above Shen Yuan's pay grade for dealing with, so he unties her and decides that they had better just get out of the whole region altogether. He already packed up anything useful from his base, anticipating he might get caught up in an adventure once he left, so they follow the river away from the settlement until they reach another one.
While they travel, Luo Binghe tells Shen Yuan about the cursed deity, Shen Qingqiu, who was cast out of the heavens for slaughtering one of his brethren and has apparently being do-who-knows what to maidens from the local village in exchange for his "protection" ever since. Sounds like a real asshole! And also mid-level boss type bad guy at least. Shen Yuan hopes he doesn't have to fight him, but he probably will.
Thank goodness he found Binghe, though! Clearly the helpful little sister type! He's definitely going to require her assistance if he's going to figure out how to navigate this world and level up his skills enough to take on a god.
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vampiresbloodx · 1 month ago
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I've missed you.
pairings: Rio Vidal x Reader
word count: 1.9k
synopsis: Your ex comes back at your doorstep.
warnings: smut, vaginal fingering, face sitting, multiple orgasms, teasing, strap on use, oral sex (r receiving), top!Rio, bottom!reader, modern au without the witch stuff, toxic ex, breakups, slight angst if you squint, squirting, so much porn, a bit of yandere!Rio, possessive and obsessed mention, strap on referred to as a cock/dick, age gap, r is in their early twenties and Rio is older, bit of soft Rio but I love her mean.
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It was your usual friday night, the week had ended and work was over for the weekend, you got to relax, do whatever you wanted to do, get things done, it wasn’t like you went out partying a lot like your other friends did, always trying to convince you to join them for a couple of drinks after your shift. You just weren’t always feeling it. 
But tonight you went out. 
Having both Natasha and Yelena talk you into it was easy enough for them, it was hard to deny them both, you loved them, they were complete idiots, matching each others personality perfectly while also being different in their own styles, most wouldn’t even guess they were sisters. 
You actually first met them years ago when the three of you were still kids. Natasha being the oldest and Yelena the baby of the trio. They treated you like you were their own sibling that they looked after, you really did love them a lot and they knew that. 
This week's work schedule was rather intense and stressful, your anxiety building up and getting rather worse, as you probably had to look into changing your meds that you were currently on as they weren’t doing what they were supposed to do anymore. Work has taken up so much of your time that you hadn’t had much of a personal life, you don’t even remember the last time you went out, like actually out, out of the apartment, aside from going for a walk doesn't really count, you felt as though you’ve been stuck inside every time you finish work. Which isn't a bad thing. Rest is good, needed, but for some reason you end up craving to be social and around your friends every so often. 
And tonight you just missed being around them. 
They never failed to cheer you up, make you laugh, they were seriously the best friends you could ask for. 
They were the very friends who convinced you to break up with your ex girlfriend, that was mostly you, but they helped a lot. 
Rio. 
God, even just thinking about her makes your stomach do a flip and your heart skips in your chest, she still has such a strong effect on you that you knew if she was here you’d probably do anything she tells you to do right then and there. 
Shamelessly. 
And willingly. 
She was your first girlfriend that you’ve ever had in your early twenties, she was older than you, which your friends claimed was a red flag alone, with the power imbalance and the age gap, but you didn’t think so. 
Since in the beginning it was paradise. 
She was the absolute best most beautiful girl you had the privilege of calling her yours, sure, she was overly possessive at times, even really protective, always checking everything you do, asking where you went always, no matter the time and place, always just there, it got too much before you knew it. 
She would even threaten some of your colleagues, making assumptions that they were flirting with you, making a move on you, from the way they stared at you, god, it was like no one was allowed near you. 
But you loved Rio. You loved her to death. 
After your rough breakup, you came to wonder if she used that against you, how naive you could be, since she was your first girlfriend, she took advantage of you. 
She knew how inexperienced you were, you had just started your new job when you first met, every time you had an issue with your co worker or your boss, she’d always listen, she was always there, but now when you look back, it felt weird, you couldn’t put your finger on it, but it was like she got off on it. 
How you relied on her so much. 
It wasn’t healthy. And yet you couldn't lie to yourself when you also liked it. 
How much control she had over you, how much of an impact she had, how easily influenced you were by you. If it weren’t for your friends, you’d probably be in a much shitter situation now. 
On nights like this, you can’t help but miss her. 
Your would be anniversary is coming up, you were always the one to plan it, she wasn’t the one to make big gestures, but she did some things. Your heart ached when you had found a sweater of hers she left behind one night as it still smelled like her, you wear it more than you should. 
Your phone suddenly started ringing, startling you as you looked at it, seeing it was Natasha calling, you almost forgot about the plans for tonight as you were so deep in thought of your ex that you realised you should be leaving soon, before you could even answer, there was a knock at your door. 
Weird. 
Natasha was the type to randomly show up even if she called, it didn’t matter, but she’d also just send a text, letting you know she’s here, you weren’t expecting company, you almost wanted to ignore it, there was a part of you that was curious. 
And that won you over. 
Getting up from your couch, you walked towards the door, letting in a breath in and out, your hand reaching out to the doorknob as you twisted it, definitely not expecting her. 
“Rio?” you said, your eyes widening as your mouth hung open. 
She chuckled. 
“Better close that mouth before a fly gets in it” she smiles, you immediately shut your mouth, she used to always say that. 
You noticed the way she was staring at you, the way her eyes roamed shamelessly over your body, you stood there, still not sure what to do. 
“Wow, you look good, going somewhere?” she asks, allowing herself into the apartment as you frowned. 
“Rio, what the fuck?-” you muttered. 
She kept eyeing you up and down, a smirk at her lips as she watched you, you started getting flustered from her gaze, of course, she decided to show up when you thought about her. 
“What do you want” you asked, slightly annoyed. 
She stepped closer, too close, as you licked at your lips, not meaning to, just a stupid habit, and she leaned in, smelling you as you gasped, pushing her off of you. She laughed. 
“Did you miss me, sweetheart?” she grinned, her hand coming up as she caressed your cheek, your body shuddered from her touch, you missed her. 
“Rio, w-why the fuck are you here” you asked, stuttering over your own words as your cheeks heated up in embarrassment. 
She cooed, cupping your face in her hand, gripping tightly, she licked her own lips this time, you stared at her tongue more than you should. She saw that. The smell of her perfume overwhelmed you as she’d always wear that specific one, you wanted to feel her. She got onto that pretty quickly, as before you could ask her another question, she pressed her lips to yours. 
She didn’t even give you a chance to speak, you couldn’t stop yourself from moaning as she kissed harder, her tongue going inside yours, making you gasp as you held onto her, she chuckled, deliberately placing her leg in between your thighs and pressing it against your core, you whimpered from the pressure, you didn’t like all this teasing she does, you missed her too much to tell her to stop. 
You started grinding your hips down on her thigh, as you desperately chased after your high, your entire body burning with want. You didn’t even know what the hell you were doing and why Rio was suddenly in your apartment after a year of not seeing her. Did she ignore the fact that you broke up with her? Why the fuck is she fucking you like it’s a normal friday night. 
Not that you were complaining either way. 
“Hm, I need more of you, baby” she murmured, her voice sending a chill down your spine as you felt her kiss along your neck, sucking at your pulse. You wrapped your hands around her neck, pulling her in closer, afraid if you blinked she’d be gone. “Shhh, I’ve got you, sweetheart, you wanna lay down for me?” she asked softly, pressing a kiss on your lips as she placed you down onto the couch, gently, still kissing down your chest and further. “I’ve missed you.” 
You couldn’t even form a proper sentence or even mumble a reply back, still focused on the way she was touching you. You allowed her to take off your dress that you were going to wear to the club tonight, but you’d much prefer this. She forced your legs apart, taking off your underwear that was already soaked through, she groaned at the sight, Rio grinned, leaning in as she licked up your pussy, causing you to cry out. 
She teased at your clit with her finger, rubbing circles and adding more pressure, pleasure boiling up inside your body as you felt like you were on cloud nine. Your cunt throbbed the more she licked and sucked, she was so good with her mouth, it was one of the things you love her doing to you after the two of you would get into an argument and she’d fuck you with her tongue. 
Your hands gripped at her hair, which was soft, just as you remembered, you were a whining mess, tightening your grip as you rode on her face. She didn’t stop until she got her fill, she easily pushed her finger inside of you, she was always amazed at how wet you were for her. She felt your thighs begin to shake, she watched your face contorted into pleasure as she admired you. It wasn’t long until you broke, you loudly cried out and she still didn’t stop, letting you feel out your high. 
She removed herself from you, immediately stripping herself from her clothes as you watched in a dazed state, she smirked, her hair a mess, Rio grabbed out her fake cock, eyeing you, letting you back out now, when you didn’t, she leaned back in, kissing your lips as she wrapped her hand around her cock, pressing it against your entrance as you whimpered, pushing hips down onto it. Rio used some of your wetness as lube, easily enough the cock eased into your pussy, she groaned, slowly moving her hips as your hands grabbed at her back, your nails digging into her. 
“Fuck baby, you feel so good” she moaned, “You gonna come on my cock? Yeah? No one else can fuck you like I can, this pussy is mine, right baby?” she said, watching as you nod, she loved how she can fuck you sensless to the point where you can’t even speak. 
You held onto her tightly as you came faster than before, you gasped, feeling like you’ve wet yourself, as you opened your eyes, embarrassment hitting you but you were surprised as you saw that you had squirted over Rio’s dick, as it was still coming, she chuckled, looking impressed as her eyes filled with lust. 
“You really missed me, huh?” she teased, your cheeks burned as you couldn’t believe what just happened, all of it feeling like it was a dream. 
And even if it was, you never wanted to wake up ever again.
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whetstonefires · 6 months ago
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#wei wuxian was a joy and jiang cheng was a duty #he felt like it was safe for him to take joy in wei wuxian because wei wuxian was not a duty #it was. uh. not safe. and created messed up dynamics. but. #he can let wei wuxian run wild without that wildness being an issue in a future sect leader #he also desperately wants to make up for what this traumatised child of people he loved has been through and make him happy #but. gives little thought to making his own son happy. happiness is secondary to sect leaderness
see, see yeah, i think it was like that, but more complicated too!
because like first of all, I don't think he thought that was the choice he was making, because I don't think he grasped that there was a reason for Jiang Cheng to not be happy? Like. He already had from birth everything Wei Wuxian was being given, and more power and status besides. He was a prince. He was born one of the luckiest people in the world.
'His mom yelling and showing no affection ever' is the only obvious problem in his life, at that age.
Objecting to having to share that good fortune, if that had been what he actually objected to, and which it often looks like is what he's objecting to, especially since Yu Ziyuan keeps giving him conceptual tools to articulate his discontent based around status-conciousness, would be an awful entitled shithead reaction, which Jiang Fengmian is deeply invested in training him out of, because giving power to someone with a Wen Chao, Jin Zixun sort of attitude toward his inferiors would be irresponsible as hell.
Which is in some ways the most responsible childrearing in the whole book! And yet.
(You can see an echo of this in what a spoiled little shit Jin Ling is and how hard Jiang Cheng enables it. I'm fairly sure Jiang Cheng deliberately didn't try to teach him ethics or manners, or to not take advantage of his status, in part because he'd hated being taught those things, and they made him feel bad, and he didn't want to pass on his own inner conflict. Because he in turn doesn't have the self-awareness to partition what about being lectured about noblesse oblige made him so unhappy.)
The only way as far as I can tell that the disparity was being communicated to Jiang Fengmian was in the form of 'you Must respect the status difference here, and withhold things from Wei Wuxian that you give to Jiang Cheng, and hurt Wei Wuxian when Jiang Cheng is hurt by outside forces. Because hierarchy.'
Which is bullshit, and Jiang Fengmian thinks it's bullshit. And in the two scenes of this conflict playing out we actually see, he is clearly objectively in the right, when it comes to the actual explicit content of the dialogue:
First, Yu Ziyuan insists that if the Wen are forcing Jiang Cheng to go to Qishan for indoctrination the Jiang have to likewise force Wei Wuxian to go as well, or it proves Jiang Fengmian doesn't love Jiang Cheng.
And Jiang Fengmian is like, that's stupid, because it is, and offers Wei Wuxian the choice, since it's available in his case, which of course Wei Wuxian takes because of course he wasn't going to let Jiang Cheng go into danger without him. Obviously.
Which is ofc a locus of unfairness in itself, even as it's perfectly fair: Jiang Cheng's higher status carries with it obligations that don't weigh on Wei Wuxian except consensually. He's safer, in almost every social context, and has more power, but that comes with a cost; he doesn't have freedom.
This is almost certainly how Jiang Fengmian understands his own life: the cost of his privilege is getting to make essentially no major life choices for himself, and having no business complaining about that when he's got it so good compared to basically all other people, but ah, he wishes....
There's a stark ideological disagreement about the nature and correct use of institutional power getting fought out here in this family, with everyone losing but especially Jiang Cheng, because he doesn't have access to most of that power yet, but by god is it already weighing on him.
Jiang Fengmian's stated policy, which there's no real evidence he didn't actually follow by and large, is to treat the two boys as much the same as possible.
Which is a good policy! It's got inherent flaws in application because of all the ways it isn't possible, which is to an extent an unavoidable part of all parenting that's exaggerated by the situation they're in, where only one of these kids is Actually His so there's this feeling that by treating them the same he's taking something away from Jiang Cheng, and meanwhile their high status enhances the drama and pressure behind all the relationships.
It's also got major flaws in application resulting from the fact that he's trying to apply this parenting model in partnership with someone who feels he has in fact a moral obligation to play favorites, and is trying very hard to make up the difference, which he in turn reacts to by trying to counterbalance her unfairness, leading to his favoritism becoming steadily more exaggerated.
The very first time Jiang Fengmian comes up in the story, the narration tells us that both Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng know that he wouldn't have come running cross-country if Jiang Cheng had punched someone important.
And how much of that was because he cared more about Wei Wuxian, and how much of it was because he knew damn well Wei Wuxian was more vulnerable, due to not having the protection of a powerful bloodline; that the Lan couldn't be trusted not to let the Jin fuck over a nobody?
We don't know. We don't even know the boys were right, since the alternate scenario never came up. Although they probably were.
But we do know that the motive didn't really matter, compared to the impact of the difference in what he did and would have done--the emotional impact of having been given reason to think that. People have very limited access to one another's perspectives. We can only act on the parts we understand, which are so painfully limited.
That's one of the major themes of the book lmao.
Then, second occasion we see things play out, there's the clusterfuck after Wei Wuxian wakes up at home following the Xuanwu, which I could write a whole post series about stg. But the core bit that's relevant here is that when Jiang Cheng lashes out verbally at Wei Wuxian, the obvious motive is a deeply unbecoming jealousy, and that's what Jiang Fengmian engages with.
When the actual situation is. He is jealous, of course, but resenting Wei Wuxian's heroic feat in a Su She kind of way is just the surface level issue, inconsequential. What Jiang Cheng is upset about is that Wei Wuxian is getting all the attention, specifically from Jiang Fengmian.
And even that is a sort of simplistic bruise over how he just achieved a frankly quite impressive rescue operation, saving Wei Wuxian's life in the nick of time, and his father probably paid him very little attention, when he got home after his grueling cross-country marathon following his first brush with other human beings trying to kill him, because he was focused on getting the rescue mission off the ground.
And then once the rescue was completed Wei Wuxian was in critical condition and had achieved a legendary feat and obviously everyone was going to focus on him, it made perfect sense!
So Jiang Cheng didn't matter. And now Wei Wuxian is being praised for taking a risk Jiang Cheng wouldn't.
Jiang Cheng is incapable of being good enough even though he has done absolutely nothing wrong.
(Except try to be responsibly risk-averse in a scenario where his peers, that is the other two sect heirs, and wwx were having the dumbass stubborn heroic reaction, but once wwx committed them to fighting he didn't hold back. Bit of a no-win scenario; he winds up in these a lot.)
That hurts! It hurts so much more for being true! He wants his father to be reacting unreasonably, not reacting reasonably in a way that simply doesn't include prioritizing him!
And he translates this into accusing Wei Wuxian of doing all this for the sake of getting attention, which is pretty obviously untrue and makes him look bad, and like four sentences later Yu Ziyuan sails in to start saying even more outrageously untrue things, and Jiang Cheng's actual feelings are totally obscured, and wind up being invalidated harder by her approach to 'supporting' him.
Wei Wuxian winds up trying to comfort Jiang Cheng afterward by saying that Jiang Fengmian is only hard on him because of the expectations of Sect Leadership, which is clearly a standard line that Jiang Cheng clings to. Because the alternatives he can think of are all worse:
That his father isn't hard on him, just responding to each of their behavior on its own merits, and Jiang Cheng is actually just worse than Wei Wuxian. That he's being unreasonable and unfilial and childish and has nothing to be upset about. Or that his father isn't as warm with him because he dislikes him, as a person. That his father centers the Sect Leadership in his upbringing not because it's so important it has to take precedence over his feelings, but because his father only values him for his bloodline. Or that his father understands exactly how he feels, and simply doesn't care.
None of these is entirely true, I think; some partly true and others quite false, but all of them are unspeakable, and unspoken (except in some cases by his mother slinging them like arrows), and therefore all are able to coexist as formless fears inside Jiang Cheng, harming him on an ongoing basis.
But Jiang Fengmian clearly does not grasp the situation on that level. And he's not being given a very good opportunity to understand! The arguments he's actually being approached with are so wide of the underlying point that Yu Ziyuan and Jiang Cheng are actively making Jiang Cheng's valid hurt feelings look like selfish bullshit.
And meanwhile, Wei Wuxian was really easy to make happy! And he pays it back to you by giving that happiness back, creating a positive feedback loop where he and his 'uncle' made each other's lives better just by being themselves.
Like, if Jiang Fengmian had tried to be funny with Jiang Cheng by going off and naming his sword for him with a stupid joke about his own inability to decide, it would have dealt him lifelong psychological damage and fucked him up about his own cultivation forever.
Wei Wuxian thought it was a hoot! He loved it! He went around tormenting people with this joke, because he and his shifu had the same sense of humor!
One of these kids is pleasant and effortless to spoil, and only thrives more the more you do it, without showing much sign of it ruining his temperament, and the other one you can never seem to say the right thing to, and takes every good thing in his life for granted, and a good percentage of the time you try to parent him someone comes and yells at you about it.
Like Jiang Fengmian's failures were specific to him, but this was not a situation where anyone without +10 to child psychology was going to manage a win.
Jiang Fengmian isn't even obligated to discipline Wei Wuxian, because Yu Ziyuan punishes him at every opportunity, so Jiang Fengmian gets to be the good guy letting him off excessive punishments. Which is positively reinforcing as fuck, especially when you're the sort of person who does not enjoy asserting power over others, and finds enjoying it morally suspect.
In a lot of ways there wasn't a decision to enjoy Wei Wuxian more, not even because it was safe; he was just...more enjoyable.
I've been in Jiang Cheng's position here--it sucks, but being 'adults' and 'children' doesn't stop both parties from being human beings, and if interacting with you is unpleasant they. Aren't going to enjoy it. They are going to enjoy the optimistic kid with social skills, who is fun to be around.
If they aren't actually denying you anything as a result, it's not any kind of abuse or neglect, it's just. Something that sucks. It's not actually more unfair than the kind of adult who emphasizes obedience and respect for their authority favoring those who play the submissiveness game properly over those who tend to act out, and that's so normal no one even questions it until it gets super ugly.
Like, the absence of an obligation to make of Wei Wuxian anything but 'happy' definitely helped, but there's also context and character, and the fact that his traumas were really obvious and straightforward to understand and address, while Jiang Cheng's were subtle, complex, ongoing, and impossible to comprehend objectively because they were so deeply entangled with Jiang Fengmian's own personal ongoing trauma.
In that sense, Yu Ziyuan was even right: because of the way she thrusts herself into the middle of the relationship even more than she'd be part of it naturally, Jiang Fengmian's love for his son is compromised by it being impossible to separate from the process of coping with an emotionally abusive spouse.
He can't fight Yu Ziyuan about how they're raising Jiang Cheng. For one thing, they're both sort of right, and he recognizes that some of her positions have some basis in reality, or at least in social norms, with which he has an ambivalent relationship. For another, fighting wouldn't help anything, as far as he can see--it's not like arguing is ever going to change her mind. For a third, he can get his way whenever he wants, technically, being the person with actual rightful authority, so putting his foot down with her when it's not necessary is just bullying.
Which I don't think is exactly true, but I'm pretty sure he feels like it's true, and that she thinks so and says it. The latter happens on-page; she preemptively accuses him of denying her her prerogatives in places where it's not a very logical thing to say.
But the way she goes after Wei Wuxian creates scenarios where overruling her is obviously called-for, which I think is also positively reinforcing for her husband in itself; he gets an opportunity to push back where he can feel in the right, instead of like shit.
I have the theory that Jiang Fengmian's father was violently abusive, and cruel to Wei Changze in particular, because his reactions are consistent with the kind of guy who on the one hand is determined not to be like his own father and overcorrecting for it, very common sort of person, but on the other sort of takes for granted that what you mostly do when someone has a go at you is endure.
I also tend to suspect that both Yu Ziyuan and Madam Jin's fathers had concubines, and their family lives were shaped by vicious inheritance politics. It would explain a lot.
Anyway there is a crazy amount of complexity sketched into these characters for how little page time they get and I'm unwell about it.
Meanwhile Jiang Yanli seems to have accepted that she was getting minimal input from either parent at a young age, and assigned herself caretaking labor as a primary way of gaining a sense of control over her environment.
I think the really interesting thing is we never see her offer or expect any support to or from Jiang Fengmian. They don't speak, in the two scenes they get together. He broke her engagement on the basis that someone who hated her would make her unhappy; he looks dolefully at her soup pot, wanting soup, but does not ask for any, and she does not offer.
She helps Jiang Cheng lie about having thrown Wei Wuxian out, so their father won't be upset with him; is that just to protect the boys from the reaction, or does she also try to protect her dad from feeling bad about things, when she can? Did she cut him out of her circle of protection as she grew up, or did she only draw it once Jiang Cheng was born, and leave her dad out from the beginning?
At one point, for about a five year period, their family was just her and her mother and father--and possibly some grandparents; we know the Jiang grandparents were alive when they pushed the marriage but it never comes up how they died, to leave a relatively young guy as Sect Leader before Jiang Cheng was eight.
Usually, that peacemaking impulse in an eldest child of a bad marriage suggests that they spent a while feeling responsible for managing their parents' distress--Jin Zixuan apparently grew up actively mediating between his parents. We don't see Jiang Yanli attempt this, but she might have when she was little.
What did the conflict between Jiang Fengmian and Yu Ziyuan look like, before they had an heir to struggle over; before they had Wei Wuxian to fight over? Did Yu Ziyuan used to yell that her husband held her in contempt because she'd only had a useless daughter for him? How do Jiang Fengmian and Jiang Yanli see one another?
Did they talk, when they were alone and didn't have to pay attention to more high-maintenance family members, and if so did that happen often, or hardly at all? Did they ever talk about anything even a little bit important?
So I was thinking about that passage where we hear about how Jiang Fengmian got so excited that Jiang Cheng was willing to be friends with Wei Wuxian that he hugged Wei Wuxian, and this broke 8-year-old Jiang Cheng's heart, because he loved to be held by his father, but his father almost never held him.
(Which led to Jiang Cheng kicking Wei Wuxian out and threatening to sic dogs on him, which made Wei Wuxian panic so badly he went and hid up a tree from these entirely hypothetical dogs, and Jiang Yanli went and found him, and then found Jiang Cheng in a hole and had to carry them both home, and their relationship was sealed by a mutual pact to hide the whole episode from both parents.)
Because the thing is, Jiang Cheng very much had something to be upset about! Wei Wuxian was a treasure and a joy to his father, something recovered beyond all hope, everything he could want in a disciple and the last remainder of the person or people he'd loved best.
And Jiang Cheng was a duty.
That was the entire reason for his existence: he was born out of his parents' obligation to produce a male heir for the Jiang.
Jiang Fengmian takes his duty seriously, but finds in it no joy, and that joylessness informed his relationship with his son at every turn.
And this is the same kind of tragedy as every other in this book. Because it's not that Jiang Cheng's father didn't love him, wasn't visibly fond of him; if there hadn't been this other person here he actually liked, the absence where he struggled to connect with him would have been felt, but it would have been less crushing.
...then, too, if his mother hadn't built that rivalry up the way she did, it would have hurt Jiang Cheng a lot less.
And been less of a thing! It's painfully obvious a lot of the aversion and distance between them is a product of Yu Ziyuan running in and screaming at her husband about how he's the worst and everything is about her at unpredictable intervals.
And of course, it's a lot harder to figure out how to compensate for your own partiality when you're also, simultaneously, trying to compensate for the partiality of another person who keeps insisting the only way to uphold the natural social order is to engage in systematic child abuse. The degree to which you cannot objectively handle a complex emotional situation while someone keeps yelling at you that you should do something morally repugnant or you're Bad cannot be overstated.
I really appreciate Yu Ziyuan as a character, but the heights of her incompetence and active malice as a parent are staggering.
But I was just reflecting on Jiang Fengmian's basic failure to grasp, right out the gate, that his eight year old was parched for affection and that giving more of it to someone else in front of him was going to hurt him. And I was like, haha that's only child behavior right there.
And then I was like. Holy shit. It is only child behavior! Like. Jiang Fengmian was an only child!
Like, duh, but that makes him a serious outlier! Most of the major characters in this story have siblings! It's an outrageously sibling-dynamic-driven book. Yu Ziyuan has at least two elder sisters, and could have any number of brothers or younger sisters--no shit she instinctively interpreted this situation through a lens of sibling rivalry!
Meanwhile that's going right over her husband's head because he's just like, okay going to vicariously live out my childhood fantasy where Changze got all the same advantages as me. 💖😊
#yu ziyuan is probably the youngest daughter#or if any are younger they're concubine's daughters in an atmosphere where that is of violent import#her relationship to her own use of violence is so deeply entitled it's pretty clear there was a lot of bullying in her natal household#and that she was considered both a person with the status to lash out#and a person of minimal enough power that she got away with a lot of yelling and threats because#as with Jiang Cheng's leg-breaking#no one took her seriously in her formative years#she acts like she has to posture constantly to have any status#like she needs to be constantly on the defensive#in a situation where the only person she doesn't have power over gives her whatever she wants almost all the time anyway#and while the fact that jfm doesn't have to do what she wants and she isn't even really forcing him clearly eats at her#that's a psychological issue that kind of needs to build itself up on something that was already there#at the time of their marriage#anyway#jiang fengmian#jiang cheng#yu ziyuan#mdzs#meta#something in there about gender too#and how people reacting against the behavior of their own same-gender parent#often wind up falling into the subtler reactive disordered behaviors of the opposite one#a pattern that does not play out in jiang cheng's case because of all the emphasis#placed on his similarity to his mother growing up#and the fact that her disordered behavior was not at all subtle#but also an issue when parenting is you wind up doing it in the context of the other parent#for example jfm held jiang cheng way more than yu ziyuan did! the *only* time he remembered her holding him was right before she died!#which creates an artificially low ceiling for cuddles where if he'd ever thought about it#he probably considered himself demonstrative just by comparison#meanwhile jiang cheng wasn't getting much in the way of mothering and was looking to his father for emotional support
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