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#she did it at the station in front of the other nurses too
unamused-kookaburra · 1 month
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I'm trying so hard to stay positive and not take it personally, but since I found out what ward I was on I've been dreading seeing the unit manager again because when I did my student placement there she was always short/borderline rude to me, and yesterday after going into my first shift with the idea of starting fresh and forgetting about our past interactions, she responded to my 'hi I'm Jacinta, I'm one of the new grads starting today and I just wanted to introduce myself' with 'yeah, I figured' before turning her back on me and walking away, leaving me standing there with no idea what to do or where to go.
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oval3000 · 11 months
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Chapter 5
Yandere Psych Patient König x Nurse Reader
Warning: Possesive, Obsession, Death, Gore, Blood, Smut, Toxic behavior, age gap.
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
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"Seriously, I'm talking to you and you're dismissing me!" Dr. Smith followed Mr. Miller trying to get off the elevator.
He turned around clenching his fist. His stared at her with pure hatred, "shut. Up. You are a psychiatrist! Do your dam fucking job and leave me out of it. The only way you get to talk to me is if it's work related not to fulfill your pathetic needs. If you're so desperate for sex? Get a dam husband!"
He left the elevator, leaving her shocked. He walked towards the nurse's station and saw you doing your work on the computer. He hasn't spoken to you after his attempt and neither have you. You avoided him like like the plague. After the comfort König gave you, you apologized for how inappropriate it was for a worker to get her personal feelings get in the way of work. He spoke to you with his thick accent, telling you that you're more than just his nurse. It really took you back at how wrong it was for you to have this sort of connection towards a patient. You had to keep your distance, even König made it a bit hard for you.
He's been more comfortable giving you physical touch by touching your cheek with his finger or tracing your hand with his. Even so, he's noticed the distance you made with him. He didn't enjoy it.
Everything has been complicated for you. Your co-wrokers wanted to know why Mr. Miller called you in his office. They were too curious about it and kept nagging you for an answer, but you told them that nothing happened. You wanted to march out those doors and never come back, but it means giving up your lifestyle you have sacrificed to live.
The heels of Dr. Smith came near you and the scent of her strong perfume lingered around you. "Check König's vitals."
"I already did." You pointed to the computer screen of König's last vital check.
She crossed her arms, rolling her eyes, her eyebrows form a sharp arch as her wrinkles showed more perfoundly, "and I'm asking you to do it again." You looked at back the computer, not staring at the screen perse, but just nothing. "Is there a problem (y/n)?"
"No." You got your supplies ready and went into König's room.
He was surprised you came in three times already and dinner time hasn't even passed. However, you're lonely visit was interrupted when Mr. Miller entered the room. He shut the door, which alarmed you. No, he wouldn't, he couldn't possibly, not infront of König, you thought.
"I think we need to talk." He said, watching you prepare to check König. You haven't made eye contact with anyone yet. "About what happened the other day." König tilted his head, listening to the conversation. His fingers tingled a bit, feeling a bit of a twitch. Mr. Miller reached to touch the side of your arm only for you to quickly yank yourself away. " I didn't mean to do those things to you. I was just stress with everything that is going on. Look, your wonderful and beautiful." His placed his hand on your back reaching," why don't I take you out for dinner, my treat," down to your ass. You felt as he gave it a squeeze, which made you jump causing you to bump into the cart. This caused König to stand up.
Was he foolish, stupid. König couldn't believe it. He swooped in and stood between you and Mr. Miller. He stood tall and broad in front of him, making him look like a child wearing a suit. "Wh-what are you doing, König. Get back on your bed." He pointed his finger on his chest, shaky, but trying to keep his confidence. "Listen to me now! Go back to your bed...you fucking looser," he whispered.
"Looser! Looser!"
Without a single thought, a single hesitation. He grasp his finger and with a quick, smooth, swift, König move it to the side. Mr. Miller let out a shriek of pain as he felt the bone of his finger breaking in half. He saw the blood coming out as the bone sticked out. "AAAHH! SHIT!"
He moved his hand with the compound fracture close to him, blood driping down to the floor, covering the white tiles with red liquid.
You covered your ears with the loud scream he made. "HELP ME (Y/N)!" He screamed at you. You were facing König's back. You were afraid. Afraid of everything.
He is going to hurt you too? Is he going to turn around and break your neck? You thought.
"FUCK!" Mr. Miller took another look at his finger and saw the bone clear as day. You peaked through and saw. You walked in front of König and saw the fracture. You were about to grab Mr. Millers hand with the wound, until you felt big, strong, hands on your arm, yanking you away from Mr. Miller. It made you collaps onto König's torso.
You heard multiple people trying to open the door. People screaming at others to get the extra key.
You felt König's breath near your neck. He lowered his head to get close to you. You felt his lips near your ear, "Is he the one, schatz?" Not breaking eye contact with Mr. Miller.
The one. The one that almost raped you in his office. You didn't say anything, you just shook your head to give him an answer.
The door eventually flew open as guards rushed in to assist the situation. They looked at Mr. Miller and saw his despair of his broken finger. Jacob and the fellow nurse rushed to help him, wrapping gauze around to help stop the bleeding while they called 911. Dr. Smith made her way and saw the scene. She was left in shock. Her jaw dropping to the floor. Her eyes widen so big it looked like her eyeballs were going to pop off her eye socket. She followed the blood trails and saw you in Königs brace.
The guards telling König to let you go. Were you his next victim? you thought. Was he going to kill you? Everything was killing you on the inside.
König released the grip he had on your arm. You walked away from him and went towards the guards.
"Sedate him." Dr. Smith demanded one of the nurses. You didn't stand up. You didn't interfere. You watched as they stuck a needle into Königs arm.
He flopped onto his bed unconscious. Everyone left the room including you. They took Mr. Miller to the hospital as the rest of the staff made in the report. Dr. Smith wasn't happy. Not one bit.
She was furious. She stared you and thought about how stupid you look. Just standing there, in shock..maybe. You didn't mutter a word. Your workers tried to question you, what happened? But you didn't give them an answer.
"(Y/n). (Y/n)!" Dr. Smith yelled out. It finally got your attention. Everything went back into sync. The blurred vision finally cleared and the echoing finally stopped. "You need to come with me for the report. Now!"
You followed her into the elevator. Her feisty walked made her heels clink harder on the floor.
As soon as the elevator doors closed, you felt the palm of her hand smacking up against your left cheek. "You stupid bitch!" Your head turned to the side, holding your irritation it developed.
"You bitch! Instead of studying, you're becoming a whore!" The mother smacked the girls cheek, making the girl cry in pain.
"Mom!? Why would you hit me!?" She cried out.
"For being a slut! Just like that cunt that stole your father!" She yelled back at her.
"We were only studying. I was just tutoring him. We did nothing wrong!" The girl tried to reason with her mother, who was in distress with what she thought she caught her daughter trying to seduce one of her fellow classmates, but the truth is she was just tutoring him.
That's all. She was just tutoring the boy who was struggling with math. Until her own mother came in and saw, greeting herself to him, saying goodbye to him. The innocent daughter thinking her mother would be proud of her for helping someone in need. Instead it was all...
"Lies! Don't lie to me (y/n)! I know exactly what you were doing. Seducing that man for your liking." She argued with her 15 year old daughter. "How dare you do this to me. Becoming a prostitute while your own mother is sick!"
"I'm sorry, mom. I wasn't doing anything to him, I swear!" The last plea she gave to her mom before recieving one last slap from her mother.
"You are a nurse and you can't even help someone in need! You let someone like Mr. Miller, who has been nothing but nice to you, get hurt like that!" She yelled at you. Your hand was trying to sooth the irritated left cheek she gave you. "So pathetic! If you think you can get away from this then think again. As soon as he's back, you'll be walking out of here."
She told you to leave. To clock out and take the rest of the day off. She said, she couldn't bare to look at you anymore. Everything you do is a disaster.
"Auughh! What a day!" Jacob groaned, closing the cabinet with the medical supplies.
"I know. Poor (y/n). I feel bad for her. Having to deal with someone like König." She sighed smacking the bottle for it to open.
The other nurse pitched in giving glances to them, "I heard that she gets triple the pay, just to take care of König. That's the reason why we are short staffed and lack of working supplies."
"Are you kidding me! She gets like what? Four patients and gets paid way more then us. Way more then Jacob, who does the heavy lifting. " The nurse, Mia, the one who banged the bottle to open, said.
"Don't feel bad for her anymore, Mia?" Jacob said, standing next to Mia.
"I did, but it's hard to feel bad for someone who does less work and gets paid more then us even though we all have the same title." She scuffed "We all went to nursing school to get our degrees only for us to get bitch slapped. I guess I feel bad, I mean, almost getting killed isn't worth anything."
"I heard that she fucks König and the administrator." The nurse, Wendy, said crossing her arms.
Mia let out a laugh of denial, "No! How!?"
"I mean she's always defending König and the way he held her earlier. They definitely fuck. Plus everytime, she leaves his room, she's happy. You don't walk out of a lunatics room unless he shoved his cock inside your pussy." Wendy leaned in closer to Jacob and Mia, "and i heard from Mr. Miller's secretary that she heard Mr. Miller talking about how good (y/n)s pussy looks like. And that she saw (y/n) walking out of his office with her clothes looking a little shriveled."
"Oh my gosh! Is that why she didn't want to tell us why she was called to his office?" Mia exclaimed with joy, like she was on celebrities gossip. "I mean it makes sense that König broke his finger. Two lovers fighting for the same vigina."
"Are you guys finish gossiping" Dr. Smith said towards the three nurses all huddled up together.
"Sorry." They said in a union.
Dr. Smith smacked the file of paperwork into the small desk. She wasn't deaf, she heard what they were gossiping about.
Mr. Miller and (Y/n). Dr. Smith didn't love it. She stared down at her wedding ring finger.
"You're leaving me!?"
"Sarah, I can't do this. Not with you!" The men screamed at her as he packed his suitcase.
"You're leaving me for that slutty waitress!" She screamed at her husband, yanking out his clothes from the dresser.
"Don't call her a slut! The only slut is you!" He words tamed with anger, burning her heart like acid.
"How many times do I have to apologize!? Me and Ben, it was only a one time thing." She plead trying to get her husband's affection. "I thought we pushed back this."
"No! You pushed it back! You wanted to pretend like nothing happened after you slept with another men! With! Your! Colleague! In! Our! Bed! Sarah!" He pulled his arm away from his soon to be ex- wife from her touch.
"And what! You don't think it hurts me too, to see you with another women. What is it!? What does she have that I don't!?" She cried to him. For an answer an answer as to why her husband went out to sleep with a beautiful waitress that attends him with his needs.
"Loyalty! Respect! Careness!" He answered her walking away from their shared bedroom, rolling his suitcase with him.
"Loyalty!? A homewrecker doesn't have any loyalty!" She chased after him.
He turned to her, hovering over her, "And you do!? She's not a homewrecker. The only homewrecker here is you when you slept with that Miller. You ruined this marriage, not her. You ruined this for us, not her. So go cry to Ben, because I don't care. Goodbye Sarah, have a nice fucking life."
Sarah saw as her husband left her. She reached to her phone. "Ben. Ben is me. He left me, Ben. I'm all alone." She cried to him.
"Dr. Smith."
"So what? You want to fuck her? Is that it. Never head young pussy before?"
"Dr. Smith." She snapped away from her thoughts and looked at Jacob. "König. He's awake."
"Check up on him." She said.
Jacob gave her a nod and walked away.
Jacob entered Königs room alongside a guard. He placed his medication on the table. König stood up. It alarmed them.
All of them.
Dr. Smith couldn't comprehend anything. She was so in her own thoughts, the screams of pain went passed her.
The screams of nurses and guards running. It finally caught her attention. She turned around in her chair and saw Jacob on the floor. His neck slit opened. The blood squirting out of his neck and into the walls and tiles. He tried his hardest to crawl away.
But nothing stopped König. She saw him coming out of his room. The guards ran to him, to hold him down, but all König did was to smash their heads into the wall. Nurses running away from him, but he quickly yanked their hair closer to him. He twisted Mia's neck all the way to the back until her spine cracked open. Wendy tripped on the blood and got her head stomped by his large foot.
Dr. Smith stood up from her chair, seeing the massacre. The screams from guards and nurses ringing in her ears. His eyes landed on her.
She ran. She ran as far as she could. She opened the door for the emergency staircase. She ran while looking back to see if he was still chasing her. Her stupidity of not paying attention caused her heel to miss a step, making her trip down.
Her hands landed on the floor, preventing her face from smashing into the tile floor. She groaned in pain. She looked down and saw her knees, right below her dress skirt, bleeding. She heard the door open and saw König walking down the stairs. She saw the look on his eye.
"Please! Please don't hurt me!" That doesn't stop him from getting close to her. She tried getting up, but her legs felt like they're going to snap. She stumbled down and landed on the floor.
She cried her eyes out. Turning around so her back is faced away from him. " *hic* please! Please don't hurt me! Please!" The Burning tears made it hard for her to see clearly.
König grabbed her neck, lifting her up from the ground. "I-I'm sorry! I'm sorry. I...I'm SO SORRY!"
He grabbed a chunk of her dirty, blonde, hair and with a quick movement, he smashed her head onto the wall...repeatedly. Over and Over.
The blood coming out. The chunk of skull falling to the floor. Her brain matter slushing out.
He threw her dead body to the floor and walked the rest of the stairs down. Finding his old clothing where he first arrived here. His tight compressed black t-shirt, his tan trousers and his black t-shirt- mask, his combat boots.He placed the needle inside his pants and went on to his destination.
Being a computer analyst and specialist really come in handy.
But nothing beats the help of his good ol'pal.
"Hello?"
"Horangi. It's König."
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The night fell. The moon shining through your curtains. You took off your shower robe, put on a bra and a white tank top and some comfy shorts. You fixed your hair and went to the kitchen.
You opened up a tea bag and dumped it into the mug with hot, boiling, water.
Silence filled the room in your apartment. You decided to enjoy this time off. To take advantage of it.
You made your way to the living room and placed the mug onto the glass table, next to the couch. You roamed around to see the remote, but couldn't find it.
The sound a bang coming from your bedroom startled you frozen. You have a view of your room and saw the window, near your bed, open.
Either be stupid like the characters in horror films and check it out, or walk out of this building.
Either way, ignorance is bliss. Pretending that you never heard anything in the first place.
You entered the bedroom, taking precaution, quickly glancing you room and found nothing.
You entered to grab your blanket when out of sudden you felt a hand covering your mouth, preventing you from making any noise. The large hand covering your entire bottom half face. You felt strong wall behind you. "It's okay, die liebe"
He pulled out a needle, the same needle they use to sedate him. He injected it into your arm.
It didn't take long for you to fall unconscious. He lifted you up and carried you, bridal style. He carried you out and placed you in his car. "Don't worry, schatz. Ich bringe dich nach Hause. (I'm taking you home.)" He caressed your cheek, giving you a light kiss on the lips. "unser Zuhause. (Our home.)"
"Mein Liebling."
"Mine."
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Invisible Smoke - Five
Summary: There is something going on with Jake’s favorite mechanic. And everything comes to an end. Pairing: Jake “Hangman” Seresin/F!Reader (No Y/N) Word Count: 26.5k (from the bottom of my heart…my bad) ABSOLUTELY NO MINORS ALLOWED A/N: This is the final chapter! Thank you for all the love on this little story of mine, I truly appreciate it. Warnings: Naval and medical inaccuracies, stalking, bodily injury, hospitals, blood, unprotected sex, female-receiving oral, my love of happy endings, pregnancy and children, and overuse of italics.
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Jake hated hospitals.
He hated the scent of bleach and the crinkle of the overwashed sheets on the tiny beds. He hated how everything was said in gentle murmurs while machines beeped and hummed in every nook and corner. But he would sit in this stupid, uncomfortable plastic chair for a week straight if it meant that he would be told how you were doing.
Everything since your house had been a blur of blood and flashing lights. He nearly fought the paramedic that shoved him out of the way to get to you, adrenaline keeping him focused on you. There had been blood everywhere. He still had some dried beneath his fingernails. The cops that had shown up had, for a moment, believed Jake had been the one to hurt you until your neighbor had yelled about a man running through his yard, covered in blood.
But they lost him.
The cops lost Luke somewhere in the next neighborhood over and you were taken away in the back of an ambulance before Jake could even get the chance to climb in beside you. They then spent another hour and a half getting Jake’s statement and taking pictures of his bloody clothes before telling him not to leave town. It was a fucking mess. Three more cops, who looked like they were more interested in getting a blonde nurse’s number than protecting you, were stationed around the hallway of the emergency room waiting area.
It had been hours since they had rushed you into surgery. No one would tell him anything about you because he wasn’t listed as your emergency contact. The nurse behind the desk did seem to take a modicum of pity on Jake–with a grim look on her face that had Jake’s stomach sinking–and told him to be patient and that the emergency contact had been left a voicemail and she hoped that they would be arriving soon.
What kind of emergency contact doesn’t pick up the phone?
Jake scrubbed a hand over his eyes, stinging and tired. But he couldn’t leave. Wouldn’t leave. Not until he knew you were okay. The one thing he did to help pass the time was telling the group chat which hospital you’d been taken to—but he kept his phone on silent when almost everyone asked what had happened. They’d probably be able to connect the dots if they were on the way to your house. There was blood smeared out onto the front stoop and into the driveway. It would paint quite a picture. The only person he actually replied to was Rooster, who had texted him outside the group.
It was him, wasn’t it?
All Jake could think to type in return was, Of course it fucking was.
He jumped when someone fell into the seat beside him and it took a stretched moment for Jake to realize that it was Maverick. He hadn’t even seen the other man walk in.
“How’re you holding up?” He asked.
“I, uh, I guess I’m fine.” That was a blatant lie but neither man commented on it. “Why are you here?”
“Rooster is calling her brother and sister, and the Kazanskys, keeping them updated. He’ll be here soon but he wanted to make sure you were okay.”
Cotton was stuffed between Jake’s ears as he stared at the older pilot, mind buzzing. “Rooster is her emergency contact, isn’t he?”
Mav nodded but had his eyes trained on the cop currently flirting with the nurse at the desk.
“What does he know? Does he-”
“He was only told that she was in surgery. As soon as he’s done with her family, he’s coming here, too.” Maverick’s voice was calm and even, the tone Jake knew he used when talking to his students.
Jake wasn’t sure if he should feel insulted or comforted. So he settled on neither. “He doesn’t know anything? Seriously?”
“They couldn’t give him an update every minute. They’re concentrating on keeping her alive.”
Jake smashed his tongue between his teeth so he didn’t say something that would get him brought up in front of Cyclone or Warlock. “Fine,” he said through clenched teeth.
The doors to the waiting room opened again and Rooster jogged in, eyes wide as they swept the lobby before they landed on the two pilots. He was then yanking Jake up and out of his seat and wrapped him in a tight hug that smelt of more bleach and sweat. And Jake froze for a moment and his arms hung limply at his sides before returning the embrace. “She’s gotta be okay, right?” His voice was strained like he was trying to speak while pulling Gs.
Jake only nodded. You had to be okay. Selfishly, he didn’t want to just have a taste of what it was like to have you only for you to be ripped away from him, bleeding out under his hands. He had felt your heartbeat slow and your body go slack. He had seen your eyes roll back, unseeing. The last thing he’d heard from the paramedics when they were shoving you into the back of the ambulance was, “she’s crashing! She’s crashing!”
But Jake still had to hope. He didn’t know what else he could do.
Rooster stepped back after a moment before Maverick suggested checking in at the nurse station to see if he could get an update. He was quick to do so and Jake watched the nurse turn to her computer, heart in his throat. Her eyes darted to Jake for a moment before she whispered something to Rooster. The other man’s hand clenched into a fist on top of the desk before relaxing again as he nodded and turned away.
Before Jake could even open his mouth, Rooster said, “they don’t know how long she’s going to be in surgery. But they’ll tell us as soon as she’s out.”
“That’s it?” Jake bit out. “That’s all they could tell you?”
“Seresin-”
Jake stepped away for a moment, shoving a hand through his hair. Screaming in the middle of the waiting room wouldn’t help. You would still be on a table in a room he couldn’t get in and he’d probably get thrown out of the hospital. That wouldn’t help you.
He just wanted to see you again. Wanted to know you were going to be okay.
“Listen,” Rooster started, “I’m sorry it took me so long to get here. I had to call Georgie and Danny and Georgie was afraid she’d gone into early labor as I was telling her. Then I had to call Sarah just as Bob and Phoenix showed up to clean up Punch’s house. We didn’t want her to come back to a mess after all this is settled.”
If she gets out was left unsaid. Truthfully, Jake wasn’t even sure you would want to go back to your house after all of that. Hedidn’t want you to go back, but that was a different argument.
Maverick stood, slapping his hands on his thighs as he did. “I’m grabbing coffee. I’ll bring you back a cup.” He didn’t let either of the other men argue before he was setting off down the hall where he’d surely come back with three cups of brown sludge.
Rooster sank back into a plastic chair and Jake slowly followed his lead.
The cops hadn’t even turned their heads when Jake had yelled. There was no way he was leaving until he knew you were safe. “Is Georgie okay?” Jake finally asked after a stretched silence.
The barest hint of a smile pushed at Bradshaw’s mouth before quickly fading. “Yeah. She’s okay. Baby is, too, and has a few more weeks before her due date. I had to convince her not to get on a plane and come down here.” He sighed. “Danny said he’d come down only if Punch asked him herself. He knows how she gets about people wanting to take care of her.”
Jake almost laughed. Yeah, he knew that, too.
“But I think he called the chief of police here and is threatening legal action for their shoddy work already.”
“Her entire family operates on a different frequency, huh?”
Bradshaw’s eyes cut to him for a moment. “I think they’re gonna like you.”
That made Jake smile. Just for a split second. Just until he remembered that you still had to pull through in order for him to meet them. He didn’t want to meet them at your funeral. “You think so?”
“Yeah.” It was soft. Softer than anything he’d ever heard come from Rooster’s mouth. It twisted behind Jake’s ribs. “You just gotta, you know, actually get your head out of your ass and ask her to dinner or something.”
Jake huffed, another trace of a smile on his face. He could refute that claim, tell him that you had promised to go get steak and that Jake saw a future with you that he would tear the world apart to see. But he didn’t. That was your secret for now. “What did you tell everyone?”
The man sighed. “The truth: Punch was nearly killed by a crazy ex-boyfriend with a vendetta.”
It was an oversimplified version of the truth, but it was a kindness, Jake supposed, to keep the gory details unspoken. You would tell the Daggers if you wanted. A small bit of shame bit at the back of his mind when he realized how intent he had been about learning your secrets. Did you resent him for it? He hoped not, but he would closely guard your secrets anyway. If he was given the chance, he’d keep all your secrets.
Rooster shook his head, letting his head fall against the wall with a dull thunk. “Georgie knows most of what happened with Luke but apparently Punch made her promise not to tell Danny that the money she gave their parents to pay off his medical bills came from Luke’s father paying her to keep her mouth shut.”
Jake screwed his eyes shut with that revelation. You were always taking care of someone else.
Maverick came back with three cups of coffee that did actually taste like tar but Jake choked it down anyway. Just as he threw his cup into the trash can, a door down the hallway opened. A woman in dark scrubs stepped out. Jake watched her step to the nurse’s station and say something before the nurse pointed at their small group.
All of them stood as she approached and Jake’s blood roared in his ears as she asked which one of them was Bradshaw. He stepped forward and Jake felt a small glimmer of hope start to spark in his chest when she smiled. “She’s a fighter. She coded twice but she came right back each time. Her lung did collapse but the second stab wound missed anything vital. If she makes it through the night, I would consider it an ‘all clear.’ She’s going to need to take it easy for a few weeks after she gets discharged here, but I am almost certain that she’ll make a full recovery.”
The rock that had settled over Jake’s heart disappeared.
You were going to be okay.
You were going to be okay.
He was going to take you to get steak. He was going to take you on that promised date. He was going to make you smile again, make you laugh. You were going to be okay.
“Can we go see her?” Maverick asked.
The doctor nodded. “She’s sedated and we’ve moved her to a private room, but I’m a firm believer in surrounding yourself with people who love you helps with the healing process. Visiting hours are over, so you’ll need to keep it down but I’ll bring you to her.”
The square hospital hallways seemed to stretch on forever and the elevator actually did stall between floors but soon Jake was pushing into your room, ignoring the pair of uniformed cops on either side of your door. There were machines everywhere and an IV drip, too.
He must have paused in the doorway because Rooster clapped him on the shoulder before scooting by him to stand at your side.
“She’d want you to be here.”
Jake looked to see Maverick standing at his side, more than a little uneasy with the glint in the older man’s eye.
“I’m not blind, Seresin. If I hadn’t known before, the way you acted tonight made it glaringly obvious.”
Shit. This could be bad. Maverick could report the ‘relationship’ to the brass and you both could be reprimanded if not worse. “Mav-”
“But I can turn a blind eye when necessary. She means a lot to you, to Rooster. The entire squadron is either cleaning up her house or waiting for word on how she’s doing. This thing, whatever it is, makes you both happy. I’m not going to stand in the way of it.”
The smallest bit of tension slid off Jake’s shoulders with that. Maverick was known for breaking the rules when he thought he was doing the right thing. If he was grouping Jake and Punch into that, he wouldn’t fight him on it. So, he offered the other man a nod, thinking it was better to keep his mouth shut anyway.
“I’ve been told she’ll have a guard at her door for the entirety of her stay here. I’ll have an orderly take down the names of anyone you’re allowing to visit.”
Rooster nodded and Jake imagined he was probably making a list of all the Daggers’ names, the Kazanskys, and a few of the other ADs to have written down.
You looked so fragile. So breakable. Of course, Jake was well aware how finite life could be. He was a fighter pilot–he knew the chances of dying could always be slim to none when it came to real dogfights or combat. But there was something different about you. You weren’t supposed to be in this hospital bed and he wasn’t supposed to be waiting for you to wake up. Not like this, anyway. He had once thought about how it would be to wake up beside you in his bed, with blankets and sheets that smelled like you and your perfume. Not of bleach and metal. You were supposed to be full of life and giving him shit, all with a smile. Not this. Not confined to a hospital bed and unconscious.
Slowly, he followed Maverick into the too-small room and took the chair on your bed’s left side while Rooster and Mav were on your right. The chair at least had a bit of padding and his spine didn’t feel like it was trying to rip itself out of alignment. But he saw how still you were. Your chest was barely rising and falling with each breath. He couldn’t hear your breaths over the beeping machines. There were thick bandages covering both of your palms, held together with sticky medical tape. A fresh wave of anger stormed at the back of Jake’s mind for a moment. He hadn’t even realized your hands had been hurt when he had rushed into your home. There had been too much blood all over you; he had only seen the two stab wounds, pumping blood out of holes in your ruined shirt. What else had Luke done to you? It was a small solace to see that most of the blood had been washed away. There were still splotches of dried blood around your fingers and beneath your chin, staining around the crux of your elbow in a ring, just clean enough for all the machines to patch in, and even more beneath your nails. Just like Jake. You had fought so hard.
“I wanted to get steak with you.”
The simple sentence you had labored to say had echoed in the back of Jake’s mind since the paramedics had ripped you away from him. Had you been scared? Were you trying to say goodbye with those words but wanting to soften the blow?
He wanted to reach out and just feel the warmth of your hand in his again, just to give himself some peace that you really were alive. That you made it out. But the furthest he reached was right beside your unmoving hand. Just out of reach. What if he hurt you? What if he was the reason everything went wrong now? He couldn’t do that to you.
“I’ve called Cyclone,” Maverick said, breaking the tense unquiet. “He has notified the MPs and said we could formally request Naval security and he would personally make sure it gets approved.”
Jake looked to Rooster to see him already looking at him. “I’d prefer that.” The cops haven’t exactly proven themselves to be reliable; the fact that Luke had managed to evade the cops while covered in your blood didn’t exactly give them any credibility in their ability to keep you safe. Jake needed you safe. Knowing someone like Cyclone was willing to throw his weight around to make sure you were as safe as possible was a calming thought, as calm as anything could be in this situation.
“Me too,” Rooster agreed.
The three men were quiet as another doctor came in a few minutes later to look you over and read your chart. His eyes did seem to flit from Bradshaw and Mav to Jake and he wasn’t subtle when he checked the time on his watch. But there was no way they were leaving. He did seem to get the hint–or the cops outside may have helped–because he didn’t say anything about them being in there well past visiting hours and said that you may wake up in a few hours. He then left the room without a look back. It wasn’t a great deal of information, but maybe they’d get more out of the day shift.
After Rooster yawned for the third time, Maverick suggested they all go home for the last few hours before dawn. “I don’t think we’ll be much help here anyway.”
“I’m gonna stay with her,” Jake said immediately. He wasn’t going to leave you now. What if you woke up and you were all alone? Someone needed to be with you until you woke up. And Jake wanted it to be him. It needed to be him.
Rooster nodded, as if expecting that, as he stood and wiped at his tired eyes. “I’ll bring you food when I swing by tomorrow.”
It was a simple enough sentence. But Jake knew what it was. Approval. They trusted him to take care of you. Sure, they trusted him in the skies and enough to help in the infrequent bar fight at the Hard Deck. But this was different. This was you.
Rooster squeezed his shoulder on the way out the door and Maverick nodded at him in goodbye before saying, “you have my number if you need anything. You call, I’ll answer.”
Jake wordlessly nodded and told them to get home safe before turning back to you. You hadn’t moved. God, he wished you would have, selfishly. He just needed to know you were going to be okay. Again, he wanted to reach out and just touch you. His hand inched across the bed and fell short again. His one comfort was feeling the warmth of you start to soak through the bedding and into the starchy sheet beneath Jake’s palm.
But he still couldn’t touch you. Not yet.
Hours ticked by and Jake tried to not yell when he heard the repeated squawks from the cops’ radios outside your door, continuously saying that they hadn’t found Luke. It was like he had vanished. Then, when he tried to watch the tiny television screwed into the wall on the other side of the room, it was tuned into a local news station that was, of course, broadcasting their story about a “violent domestic disturbance” with your house in the background lit up in blue and red lights. “Police say that the suspect is still at large.” He quickly turned the television back off with a grimace and a matching curse. There was no way to make the chair more comfortable and Jake settled for leaning forward to settle his arms across the bed near your legs and drop his head onto his hands. This could work, right? And he hadn’t meant to fall asleep, but a few minutes later, he was snoring.
Jake woke to the sound of poorly hidden whispers scratching at his ears and a crick in his neck. His eyes slowly opened, squinting against the brightness of the room to see Bob and Phoenix bickering not-so-quietly near the door. Both had large bouquets of flowers in their arms, along with a small bag from a diner down the street, and were dressed in their khaki uniforms; they must have stopped by before heading to base. A quick glance at his watch let Jake know that it was still fairly early, probably not even close to proper visiting hours.
“You owe me ten bucks,” Phoenix said. “I knew he wouldn’t leave her.”
“I refuse to acknowledge a bet right now.” But Bob still pulled out his wallet and handed over a crisp bill to his pilot. “Ridiculous.”
“I am clinging to the fact that she’s alive enough for him to fall asleep at her bedside, all right? I need a little joy.”
“And ten dollars, apparently.”
“I’m awake, you know,” Jake groused as he sat straight. Both his neck and back popped noisily and Bob grimaced at the noise but Jake hardly cared as he turned to look at you, hoping that your beautiful eyes would be open and you could smile at him again.
But you were still unmoved on the flat pillow. Nothing had changed.
As if on autopilot, Jake reached out to grab your hand but stopped short, curling his fingers into his palm before his hand fell back into his lap.
“I’m surprised you slept at all,” Bob said as he took the flowers from Phoenix and filled a vase–that he apparently brought with him–with water and dropped both bouquets into it before setting it near the window.
“It was an accident,” Jake said, turning his head left, then right, eliciting another pair of pops. He probably should get up and splash some water on his face at least. Maybe he could ask Rooster or Javy to swing by his house and grab him a change of clothes. He scrubbed the sleep from his eyes as he pulled his phone out of his pocket and saw a text from Maverick telling him that he had been cleared to take the day off. He hadn’t even thought about that. All of his thoughts had been consumed by you. Phoenix handed him the diner bag and said it was from Rooster but he caught the knowing look in her eye. It didn’t matter. None of it mattered right now. He didn’t care about hiding how he felt about you now. To be fair, she had probably suspected something at brunch.
Bob hummed and took the chair Rooster had used last night before scooting closer to the side of the bed. He carefully took one of your hands in his, mindful of your bandaging and the wires and tubes connecting you to the machines, and kissed your fingers. “Hi, Punch,” he whispered.
Jake looked away, feeling a bit like he was intruding. He knew how much this must be hurting Bob, too. To know that the man that he had saved you from once, had tried to kill you again.
Bob had no problem touching you. So, why couldn’t Jake? He just needed to reach out and touch you. Just slip his fingers beneath yours and give himself that small bit of peace. He continued to war with himself when Phoenix leaned over just enough to kiss your forehead. “I have so much to tell you and I have so many questions, but you have to get better first, all right?” She whispered. “First you need to get better.”
Jake stood and gave them a moment, moving into the small ensuite to freshen up as much as he could and scrubbed a bit more blood from under his nails. When he glanced at himself in the mirror, he nearly grimaced. His hair was a mess. He had dark circles beneath his eyes, and his shirt–not the one that was covered in your blood, that one had been handed over to the cops–grabbed from his gym bag in the backseat of his truck, was rumpled and smelt of hospital. He texted Javy and asked for him to bring a change of clothes and his toiletries go-bag if he had the chance after work. It felt like his entire universe had shifted on its axis ever since Phoenix’s text had come through. How many different ways could he tell himself that he nearly lost you? Still, he pushed out of the bathroom to see Phoenix flipping through the charts usually clipped to the end of your bed, and Bob slowly pulling away from you as he stood.
“I don’t think you’re supposed to be going through those, Phoenix.”
But she waved him off, eyes flicking over the papers. “My sister is a neurosurgeon, you know. I helped her study all the time. I can read a chart just fine.” The other pilot looked over your charts in silence before dragging her gaze to him. “Rooster said you were the one who found her before the paramedics arrived.”
It wasn’t a question but Jake still nodded with his stomach curling into knots.
She snapped the chart shut and clipped back onto the edge of your bed. “You helped save her life. Keeping pressure on her wounds likely kept her from bleeding out before they could sew her back up. Your hands helped her then, they won’t hurt her now.”
Bob stepped to his pilot’s side with a sigh, halting anything Jake could have said. “We should probably get back to base.” He then clapped Jake on the shoulder with a small smile. “Let us know if you need anything. Either of you.”
Phoenix essentially did the same and turned toward the door. Just before she disappeared into the hall, she turned back to Jake and set her mouth in a firm line. “You are two of the most stubborn people I’ve met. But don’t be stubborn with this. Okay?” And then she turned and left, leaving Jake alone with you again.
Damn.
They won’t hurt her now.
He had to believe her. He had to. Slowly, Jake sat back down and reached out. His hand hovered over yours for a moment before gently falling over yours, mindful of your bandages. You were warm, so warm. Alive. Tears stung at Jake’s eyes as he curled his fingers around yours. He had nearly lost you. He could still see your scared eyes looking up at him. He could still see the blood on your teeth. He could still see it all. Jake raised your joined hands to his mouth and he brushed a kiss to your fingers. “I’m right here, Punch. All right? I just need you to wake up for me. Show me those beautiful eyes, darlin’.”
But you didn’t open your eyes. You didn’t move. And Jake had to continue to hope that you would soon.
A nurse came in a few moments later and looked you over, carefully poking and prodding before injecting something into one of your IVs. The twitching of your fingers grew slower and slower until it stopped.
“What did you give her?” Jake asked.
The nurse threw him a look over her shoulder before scribbling something in the chart. “Just something for the pain. She’s going to be uncomfortable when she wakes up. That should just take the edge off for now, until we can figure out how she’ll respond to other pain medication.”
Before Jake could even think to ask if they knew when you could wake up, a familiar face was bursting through the doorway and nearly leveling the nurse who was trying to leave. Sarah Kazansky was a flurry of movement as she came in, looking like she’d sprinted out of her house at first light to arrive at the hospital.
“Oh, my sweet girl.” Sarah’s voice shook as she took the chair at your side and set both her hands over yours. “What has he done to you?” The woman sniffled and moved to press the back of her hand to your forehead, the standard mom move to check a kid’s temperature, before setting her hand on your cheek. Sarah was quiet for a moment before she slowly turned to look at Jake with tears in her eyes. “Bradley said you found her.”
Apparently Bradley had told everyone more information than he had let on. “Yes, ma’am.”
She nodded. “I’m glad it was you.” It was a strange thing to say, but Jake didn’t voice that opinion. Sarah knuckled at the corners of her watery eyes. “You know, I always wanted another child—it wouldn’t happen, but then she came barreling into our lives and she just fit, like she’d always meant to be mine. Always meant to be the third kid for me and Tom. She knew exactly how to help me when I needed it, knew what Tom needed without him needing to ask for it. Lord knows he’d never ask for anything.” She huffed, a wet laugh. “She might not have come out of me, but she is mine. She’s my girl. And she looked at you like you hung the moon, you know.” She smiled at him then. “I’ve never seen her look at anyone like that. And then you looked at her like she had done the same.”
Jake didn’t particularly know what he was supposed to do with that observation, but he found himself smiling. Maybe he hadn’t been as good at hiding it as he had once hoped. And you had let your guard down enough in the home of the family you loved to be open enough to show how you felt. “Sometimes, I think she did.”
Sarah’s smile widened a fraction but still didn’t quite reach her eyes. “She deserves that. She’ll make you work for it though.”
“She’s already put me through my paces, I promise,” Jake said with a small smile of his own. “But she’s worth it.”
The older woman looked at him then, quiet and calculating, and Jake once again found himself fighting the urge to stand a little straighter in the presence of a Kazansky woman. She must have found something in his face because she gave a shallow nod before turning back to you. Her thumb swept over your knuckles. “Thank you for saving my girl.”
Both of them were quiet for a stretched moment, not needing to say anything else to each other. Sarah did stand when yet another doctor walked in and grabbed at your chart. “What can you tell me about her prognosis?”
The doctor, a man who looked like he’d been waiting for this exact question, nodded with a small smile as he folded his hands over the chart. “The fact that she needed little more than observation overnight is only good news. From what I understand from the surgeon, she is resilient. Once she wakes up, which should be shortly, she may be in a great deal of pain. It will only be temporary and I can assume that she will make a full recovery if she has the support she will need.”
“She’ll have it,” Jake said. You would have him no matter what you needed.
**
Coming back to yourself felt like swimming through tar, slow and strenuous. Even opening your eyes was a herculean effort and you immediately hated how bright the room was. It felt as if you’d tried to inhale an over-bleached towel and you tried to swallow any spit to help with the dryness but only ended up coughing. That was when your body decided to remind you that you had been stabbed twice. The pain stretched across your body like a whip of heat lashed out from your stomach. You bit back another cough and grimaced as it only made your throat ache. You looked to the side to see if there was a glass of water or something you could sip on and the room tilted for a moment.
“Fuck.” You hurriedly shut your eyes to keep your stomach from lurching. A section of the bed falling near your knees had you slowly opening one eye.
It was Jake.
Your Ken.
And he was sticking a bendy straw into a small cup of water before holding it near your mouth after pushing the button on the side of the bed to get you into a slightly elevated position, sitting instead of fully on your back. “Small sips, okay, Punch? Don’t overdo it.”
The water almost had you wincing as it filled your overly dry mouth but you still took a few more sips, breathing easier when your throat didn’t feel like sandpaper anymore. As you took a final sip, straw falling from your lips, you were still looking at Jake, feeling a little less like a human bobble head, but still a little strange.
He only stepped away from you for a moment to call for a nurse before returning to your side again. He didn’t say much, but his eyes were roving all over you, making you think he was trying to find something you were hiding. In your hazed mind, you wondered what you could possibly be hiding. Did you take his car keys?
The small bit of confusion continued as a nurse swept into the room and started to ask you a few questions you blearily answered and then had to sit still while a doctor looked you over, too, pressing lightly at your side and checking the weird tube and patch jutting out under your arm. By the time they finished and you were nodding along when they said they would be back to check on you again later in the day, you felt a little more settled in your skin.
Jake, who had stood near the window the entire time and hadn’t moved aside from nodding when the doctor or nurse told or asked him something, moved to stand at your side again. “How’re you feeling? What do you need?”
“Are you okay?” you asked in return.
Jake’s smile was shaky and you could tell he was tired–you couldn’t miss the rumpled shirt and matching hair, nor the dark circles beneath his eyes. But he was still beautiful. “I think I’m supposed to be asking you that, Punch.”
“I feel like I’ve been stabbed twice and then put in one of those spinners at the state fair.”
“Well, you look great, all things considered.” His fingers brushed your cheek and you leaned into it as best you could.
“You’re such a liar. I know I look like shit.”
“You’re beautiful, same as always. Just a little banged up.” And he said it so sincerely that you almost had tears in your eyes.
You hated that it took being stabbed twice for you to give yourself permission to really try to be happy again. Jake could make you happy, wanted to make you happy, would make you happy. You knew that even with the residual effects of the anesthesia and everything else falling on your shoulders.
You just had to let him.
“Do you still want to get that steak dinner with me?” You asked, hating how small your voice sounded.
Jake smiled—fucking smiled—and moved to smooth a hand over your forehead before brushing a kiss to your temple. “Let’s get you cleared for solid foods first, okay?”
“Is that a yes?”
“It’s a hell yes. But let’s make sure you can move without tearing a stitch.”
You smiled, ignoring how you felt one of your lips start to crack. “I’ll even let you pick me up.”
Jake’s sea glass eyes sparkled in the shitty fluorescent lights. He’d always been so pretty. “And you’ll let me pay? What about bringing you flowers, can that be negotiated?”
Just for a moment, you paused as thoughts raced through your mind. This was different. He wasn’t Luke and you weren’t scared of him. “Only if I get to take you out to ice cream afterward.”
“Oh, you’re already thinking you’ll make it to dessert?” He teased with a smirk you could feel pressing into your skin as he brushed another kiss against your forehead. “Presumptuous.”
“I have it on good authority that you may like me, even when I look like death.” You hoped your smile was convincing as he stepped back, warm hand still holding the side of your throat.
His thumb smoothed a gentle path across your pulse as his green eyes locked with yours. “You look like you beat death back with a stick.” He paused and you knew he was trying to choose his words carefully. “It’s a good look, you know. But I’d appreciate it if I never have to see you like this again.” His words held none of his usual bravado or confidence and your heart dropped when you noticed just how sad he looked. And not just sad. Scared.
You blindly reached up to grasp at his hand, curling your fingers over his thumb in an attempt to prove to him that you were okay–you could deal with the slight ache in your hands later. You just needed him to be okay, too. “It was a baseball bat, but I can promise you I have zero intention of trying to do it again.”
“Good.” He pulled in a slow breath and you felt him twist his hand in our grip so he could pull your joined hands up and he pressed a kiss to your fingers before holding your hand gently between both of his on the edge of your bed. It was like he couldn’t stop touching you and you reveled in it. “I don’t know what I would do without you.”
The simple sentence had your entire chest flooding with warmth. Feelings you had tried to ignore were pushing at the tip of your tongue but you couldn’t form the words. Not yet. Not even with Bradley’s words ringing like a bell at the back of your mind. “I’ll try to make sure you never have to find out.”
The look in Jake’s eyes had the warmth in your chest growing hotter. It was too knowing, too wanting, too…
His mouth opened and then shut again and Jake shook his head. He hooked a foot around the leg of the chair behind him and lowered himself into it as he kept a hold of your hand. “I have to tell you something.”
“What is it?” You asked, feeling your face scrunch in confusion.
Jake licked at his lips and took a deep breath in. “They still haven’t found him.”
“What?” The single word cracked on your tongue as familiar claws of dread started to close around your heart. “What do you mean?”
“The cops lost him somewhere behind your neighbor’s house but-”
“No, no, no, no. Don’t tell me that.” One of the machines at your side started to beep and flash. This wasn’t happening. This couldn’t be happening. “Jake. Don’t tell me that. They-they have to ca-catch him! How-”
Jake moved to smooth his hands up your arms until he was gently grasping the back of your neck and he pushed his forehead against yours. “They’re out there, right now, looking for him. They’re not going to stop until they catch him. And he is not evergoing to touch you again. I won’t let that happen.”
“J-Jake.” His name broke in your throat and you hated that the tears you knew were forming in your eyes only brought you more pain and embarrassment. This had to be a nightmare. Had to be. There was no way you nearly died and Luke was still out there. “He…he…”
“Luke is not going to touch you ever again. I swear it.”
Tears blurred your vision despite the strength shading Jake’s words. “You don’t know that.”
“I do because I’m going to make sure he never touches you again. I don’t care if I have to put him in the ground, he’s not putting his hands on you again.”
The machines were still whirring, sounding your distress out into the room and letting it echo like a wraith in the sterile air. But Jake did not pull away, did not tell you that you needed to calm down or negate anything that you were feeling, but he held you through it until your breathing evened out again and you slumped further into your flat pillow but did not pull away from Jake. “I can’t do it again,” you whispered.
“You won’t have to.”
You blinked away the tears in your eyes and pushed Jake back just enough to look at him. The fear you saw in his face was gone now, replaced by a steely determination you only usually saw before climbing up into the cockpit of his jet. He was going to do anything for you–the thought was equal parts horrifying and comforting. “I don’t want you to get hurt for me either.”
“We are going to be fine. Both of us. And we’re going to go get that steak.” He reached up with his other hand to carefully cup your cheek and you remembered that he held you like this when he’d kissed you in your living room. It all seemed like ages ago now. And you wanted his words to be true, to know that you'd both be okay when this was finally finished. But something whispered at the back of your mind that you and Jake weren’t safe. Not yet. Not when Luke was still out there.
A knock at the door had you separating and looking to see a grim looking MP walking into the room. “There’s a detective here to speak with you,” he said, looking at you. “I can send him away if you’re not available.”
Jake looked at you, waiting for your answer. “Let him in. I should probably get this over with.”
The MP nodded and stepped out again before escorting a man in an ill-fitting suit into your room. “I’m Detective White, I just need to ask you a few questions.” He held out his hand but quickly retracted it when you reached out with your own bandaged one and then hurried to grab a small pad of paper from inside his jacket and tapped a pen on the top of it with a terse smile. “It won’t take long.”
Instead, Jake squeezed your hand with a small smile. “I’ll just be right outside.”
Would it be ridiculous for you to want him to stay? To say that you felt safer with him in the room? You could feel the detective’s eyes on you and you hated it. You hated how stupid you felt in that moment and how insecure and ridiculous. “Can he stay?”
“Miss-”
Jake immediately said your rank and last name, making sure to put enough emphasis on it that he knew that was the correct way to address you. It made you smile for a moment, knowing he meant it as a way to protect you. “I’d like him to stay.”
The detective’s eyes darted to Jake for a moment before he squeakily cleared his throat. Your name and rank soon followed and he tapped his pen on his pad of paper again. “That isn't standard procedure.”
“Look, I have two holes in me that shouldn’t be there. Jake held me together and kept me alive until I could get to the professionals. And I’d still like him to stay.”
Jake hid a smirk behind his hand before he sank into the chair by your bed.
“Okay, well,” the detective started as a ruddy blush blotched across his cheeks, “we can work with that.”
The interview took hours. You only stopped once to sip on some water and poke at the bland hospital food that was delivered and that was mostly at the behest of the bedraggled nurse who came in to check on you. And Jake did not move from his post at your side. When you had paused to catch your breath, embarrassed, angry tears biting at the back of your eyes, Jake always managed to keep you steady without even needing to say more than, “it’s okay, Punch, you got this.”
Detective White did actually shake your hand on his way out and you tried to ignore how his grip made you innately aware of the stitches in your palm. “We’ll get him, I swear it.”
You hoped he had more confidence in his police work than what you heard in his voice. He sounded unsure. When the detective left, you turned to Jake to see him frowning, yet again. “You feel as good as I do about that, huh?”
He sighed and shook his head. “They haven’t exactly proved to be reliable. Or competent.”
You laughed—it was worth the sharp ache in your stomach. You had to laugh otherwise you may cry again. “Well, I guess we will just have to wait and see.” What else could you do?
Another knock at the door pulled your attention and you were thankful for the distraction, even more so when you realized it was Rueben and Mickey now sticking their heads into the room. You quickly waved them in and let them shower you with movies and books they had brought to help you pass the time and you laughed when Mickey said you now had no excuse to not start watching Star Trek: Deep Space Nine. The pilot and WSO were always kind and funny, but you could tell they had questions and you set the Blu-ray set aside before taking a deep breath. “You can ask. ‘s all right.”
You had always thought the bond between pilot and WSO was intrinsic and nearly magical, and you got to watch it in action when Reuben looked to Mickey and they were quiet for a moment before turning back to you. “Are you okay?” Reuben asked gently.
Your shoulders slumped. They were always so nice to you. “I’ve been told that I’ll be okay eventually. I just need to take it easy for a while.”
They asked if you needed anything in particular and didn’t take your ‘no’ for an answer and promised to bring you every unhealthy food they could think of once you were cleared for “real people food,” as they called it. Mickey’s watch beeped a few minutes later and he sighed. “Time’s up for us, Mav’s only given us an hour each.”
“Apparently he thinks that Cyclone would notice if we all just didn’t show up today.”
You had to smile at that. Captain Mitchell creating a timetable so all the Daggers could come visit without higher brass permission to skirt duty was probably the most on-brand thing you could think of him doing. It was a kindness, truly. Perhaps you should have confided in him—Tom had trusted him, Bradley, too. But maybe trusting people implicitly would take more time.
You said your goodbyes to Mickey and Rueben and Jake somehow got a blu-ray player delivered to your room and set it up quickly after belatedly pointing out the flowers Bob and Natasha had brought you—they were your favorites. You’d have to text them a thank you later.
“Look at you go, Ken. So handy. Next I’ll have you painting walls and tightening leaky faucets.”
A lazy wink was thrown over his shoulder in your direction. “Whatever you need, Punch. I’m pretty handy.”
You laughed and tried to ignore the stinging bite that came with it but you still set your hand over your stomach as if that would help disguise what you were feeling from his gaze. It didn’t work at all and Jake abandoned his task to hurry to your side. “I’m fine,” you said, pushing a smile to your face and hoped that would be enough for him to ignore how the heart rate monitor beeped erratically for a moment as you tried to breathe through the new wave of pain.
Jake shook his head. “You don’t have to lie to me. I’m here to help you.”
You sighed. That would be another thing you would have to work through. “Sorry. I just…” Your words trailed off as Jake once again took your hand in his. He might be fond of touching you, but you knew you were fond of him touching you. He was always so gentle with you. “I just don’t want to cause a fuss.” Which you knew was stupid because you were in the hospital after being nearly murdered.
“You are worth the fuss.”
Was it pathetic to think of that as romantic? Maybe. But your heart still leapt as he looked at you but a familiar, self-satisfied smirk started to push at his mouth when your heart rate monitor betrayed you and let out a happy little beep-be-beep and there was no way you could talk your way out of it.
His smirk faded the slightest bit before he said, “I mean it. You’re worth the fuss. You’re worth a lot more than what you’ve been given.”
The fact that Jake wanted to be the one to prove it to you was even better. You just had to let him, you reminded yourself.
“Am I interrupting something?”
You and Jake retreated from each other (you mostly just pushed further into the pillow at your back) as Callie and Neil came in with balloons and another bouquet of flowers. They told you how the Daggers and other ADs were keeping it quiet about why you were currently in the hospital, but the Top Gun hopefuls did send along their well wishes that you supposed they mostly meant (except Royal, who you knew didn’t have a sincere bone in his body).
When they left, you got exactly seven minutes and twelve seconds into the first episode of Deep Space Nine before Billy, Logan, and Brigham came in with a teddy bear wearing a miniature version of their flight suits and your last name stitched over the heart. They also told you that there has been increased security stationed at every entrance to the base with extra protocols in place for entry.
Good. Luke probably wasn’t quite dumb enough to try anything on base, but knowing your friends would be safe on base was a comfort.
Javy was the next to visit, a small duffle bag in hand for Jake and wearing a suspiciously wiggly coat. He unzipped it with a wink and a familiar dog was carefully placed on your bed. “Sweet Pea!” You happily squealed at the sight of the tenacious Pekingese. She was quick to clamor up your legs to offer you a lick at your chin in greeting before immediately making herself comfortable in your lap. “You’re breaking so many rules right now,” you said, more traitorous tears stinging your eyes as you sank your fingers into Sweet Pea’s soft fur. You had watched Sweet Pea for Javy during his deployment a few months ago and had fallen head over heels for the dog immediately, even going so far to ask Javy for weekly updates, which he readily gave.
Javy waved it away and gave you a quick kiss on the temple. “You’re worth it, Punch. And she was missing you anyway.���
Jake nudged him with a halfhearted scowl but you hardly cared when your fingers sank into the dog’s fur again. You didn’t even mind when Sweat Pea started to gnaw on the teddy bear, she was your favorite and the bear was probably machine washable anyway.
Javy eventually left after a close call with a doctor who came in to administer another dose of pain medication and to check on your stitches. You and Jake eventually settled in enough to watch a few episodes after he changed into the fresh clothes Javy had brought him.
(“What is this show even about?”
“I have no idea.”)
After another gelatinous meal was presented to you and Jake only half heartedly tried to get you to eat it, you were handed a new set of pills by your doctor who told you that they would help stave off infection and probably make you a little sleepy, too.
“I do recommend you take them with food,” the doctor said after spying your uneaten lunch pushed off to the side.
Well, that certainly wasn’t going to happen but you said you would eat it before taking the pills just so he would leave the room.
“You’re not actually going to eat that, right?” Jake said in a low and disgusted voice as soon as he was sure the doctor was out of earshot.
“Absolutely not.”
“Good. I’ll grab you a smoothie or something from the cafeteria downstairs. Do not take that without eating.” And then he was dashing away, startling one of the MPs at your door by the sound of it, too. When he returned, your favorite smoothie in hand, you had a hard time keeping the smile off your face even as the large pills stuck briefly in your throat. No one had really taken care of you like this. Not since you were a child, anyway. Red tape had kept you alone after Luke’s first two attempts on your life and you had to heal alone and in silence. This was new. Different. And for the umpteenth time, you realized that Jake wanted to do this for you. All of it.
You really needed to have a talk with him. A real talk. Unfortunately, it seemed the doctor’s warning that the medication would make you sleepy was an understatement. As soon as you finished your smoothie, you were already fighting to keep your eyes open. Jake took your empty cup from you and threw it away and you saw him starting to settle into his chair again, a wince already scrunching his features.
“You need to go home and get some sleep.”
Jake’s eyes cut to you with a frown. “I slept just fine here last night. And it is barely past lunch anyway.”
You sighed but the fondness clouding your lungs had it sounding a little forced and your limbs were sagging with the need for sleep. “Stubborn man. You have work tomorrow. I won’t have you falling asleep at the controls because of me.”
“I could just not go in,” he muttered like a child.
“Ken!” You chided, fighting a smile, lips twitching at the corners. “I’m not worth going AWOL.”
His face scrunched, as if he was insulted. “I already told you this: you’re worth a lot.”
God. He was infuriating and adorable. And usually only used one of those words when describing him. “I need you to go to work, all right? After getting a goodnight’s rest in a bed.” You watched him open his mouth and quickly added, “and no, I can’t just scoot over to make room for you in this one.”
Jake was quiet again, mulling over his options, before standing. “I can be back in time for dinner, or whatever slop they give you in a few hours, and-”
You raised a lethargic hand toward him and sighed when he laced your fingers together, letting his sentence go unfinished. “I need you rested, all right? I need you flying; that’s where I know you’re safe. Happy.” You yawned, the ache you’d been fighting settled into your bones, low but manageable. Damn, those pills were something else. And so were Jake’s eyes.
“I can be happy here, too.”
“Go home, sweet man. Visit tomorrow. Take a shower. Sleep.” You definitely were about to fall asleep. Everything felt so warm and loose, almost like you had one too many drinks to be tipsy.
“You saying I smell?” He asked with a laugh, but he still leaned down to press another kiss to your forehead.
“Yes—like blood and hospital. But you’re still so pretty. Pretty Ken.”
He chuckled and you felt him stand rather than saw him as your eyes finally closed. “Yeah, my pretty darlin’. You win this round.” With another careful kiss to your temple and his thumb pressing at the edge of your chin, he was gone and you were out like a light.
The next afternoon, you woke up to the sun shining in through the window and Bradley setting a bag onto the chair beside your bed. When he noticed you were awake, a slow smile started to push across his mouth. “Hey, sleeping beauty.”
“Hey,” you replied, the single syllable slow and syrupy with sleep.
He moved a little closer and you could see the circles beneath his eyes and his caramel waves were in a bit of a mess. But his service khakis were still neatly pressed—that was good. “You were asleep when I came in yesterday. Seresin said they gave you some pretty heavy duty stuff. How’re you feeling?”
That pain medication must’ve truly been something else because you mostly just felt uncomfortable rather than anything else. “I’m okay. Might be hungry though.”
Bradley’s smile widened a fraction and he opened the bag and pulled out a sandwich from the deli just off base that you frequented, usually with Bradley, and your cellphone which had almost 200 notifications. “I asked, like, four nurses if you were cleared for real people food and they said as long as you don’t overdo it, you should be fine.”
You weren’t entirely sure how you could overdo eating a sandwich, but you weren’t about to ask in fear of them taking the sandwich away and replacing it with the slop you managed to evade yesterday. It felt like heaven in your hands when Bradley (carefully) set it in your grasp. “Yeah sure,” you said, suddenly much more awake than you had been moments before.
But he also held out a bottle of water and shook it. “Water first. Sandwich later.”
“Then you should have led with the water,” you grumbled but you still drank it with careful sips after he glared at you after you sputtered over your first overzealous mouthful. He let out an exaggerated sigh when you pouted as he put your medication on the little table beside your bed and said you needed to take those, too. He really did bait and switch with the sandwich. A true big brother move that you begrudgingly accepted with a smile you tried to hide behind your water bottle.
(The sandwich in question was delicious and you didn’t even care that Bradley told you to slow down twice—you should have listened because you felt nauseous for a solid hour after polishing it off. Worth it.)
Bradley sat and watched an episode of Deep Space Nine with you before he told you that Sarah was planning on stopping by again today and that Bob and Natasha would probably try to swing by after being dismissed for the day, too. “Your sister is a very avid texter, by the way.” He pulled out his phone and showed you the fifteen texts he’d received from Georgie in the last two hours. They were all about you, obviously, and your stay in the hospital. Toward the end of her barrage of texts was a quick, also, Danny is wondering who this ‘hangman’ is. Might want to give both of them a heads up.
You almost laughed at that. After noticing your parents’ complete detachment from you, Danny had taken up the self-imposed role of ‘protective brother’ and had tried his best (either from a hospital bed or across state lines or both). It had always made you smile because he was more likely to throw a textbook at someone and then run away than to actually throw a punch. He was a good man. Gentle. A good brother to you. You knew he and Georgie would like Jake, even if they pretended not to for a solid five minutes.
“I’ll handle her. Promise. How was everyone yesterday and this morning?”
“Hangman was a little distracted.”
“Was he okay? Did he-”
“He’s fine,” Bradley said, fighting a smile. “But he did pull some stupid stunt when Royal was about to get tone on him.”
“Oh? It must have been something else if you’re calling it stupid,” you teased, earning a halfhearted glare in return. But this was good. Almost normal. Like you weren’t in a hospital and Bradley wasn’t taking a day of leave to stay at your side. Then you remembered… “Oh, Bradley, your date with Natasha! I ruined it! You were supposed to go to dinner, weren’t you? Natasha had a plan-”
Bradley’s hand settling over your arm quickly halted the rest of your rambling. “Please chill out.”
“Okay, but, what if I don’t?”
“They’ll probably have to sedate you,” he said, trying to keep a straight face and failing. “It is fine. Really. We rescheduled.”
“Easy as that?” You asked. Guilt still twisted your stomach. They had been in love with each other for years and had one date and then you had to get stabbed and ruin their second.
But Bradley nodded. “Easy as that. I took my time to get off my perch, I don’t mind waiting a little longer for a second date. We both would have just been worried about you anyway.”
You grimaced, guilt still gnawing at your bones. “I’m sorry anyway.”
“You did not purposely get stabbed so we couldn’t get a second date,” Bradley said, voice more serious than it had been just a moment ago. “Please don’t beat yourself up about it. We have time. We made time.”
You moved to set your other hand over his with a sigh. “If you say so.” God, you hoped it was true.
It would be a long recovery, you knew that. But it seemed a little easier this time, even with the extra damage, because you had people that cared about you. You weren’t lonely and twiddling your thumbs alone in the hospital room, waiting to be released and being told to keep your mouth shut or to report to the brass as soon as you were discharged. This was different.
It was different when the Daggers still took turns visiting you and your fellow ADs did, too. Sarah stopped by as well, and made you video chat with Junior and Lily who both worried over you until you promised that you would be fine. They both offered to visit, or in Lily’s case she offered to smuggle you out of the hospital, but you declined and told them to both just focus on wedding planning or classes. “I’ll be fine!” You even winked for good measure.
Yeah. This time was different. Recovery wasn’t exactly a walk in the park and the tube coming out of your side was always annoying and bordering on itchy, but you got through it because you had people who cared about you. To your delight and dismay, Jake was the most frequent visitor to your stuffy hospital room. He brought food and books and seemed to be watching Deep Space Nine on his own because he was never lost when he sat down to watch an episode or two with you.
It was good and gentle and god you wished you could kiss him again. But it seemed he was trying to give your poor heart a break and rile you up at the same time. You had never been treated so…delicately before. Like you were something, someone precious. But god you wanted to kiss him. Even more so when he was the one to wheel you out of the hospital, complete with boyish car noises when he would speed around a corner. You weren’t even a little surprised when he drove you to the temporary housing on base instead of your house, only relieved. Bob and Natasha had been the one to tell you it was probably a good idea for you to not stay at your house for the time being and had set up your stay on base. You didn’t need a ton of convincing; you weren’t sure if you’d ever be able to step foot into your little bungalow again without seeing Luke hiding in the shadows or your blood staining the floors.
The temporary housing was little more than a hotel room with a kitchenette, but you weren’t about to complain. Not when all of the Daggers and your fellow ADs were waiting inside with balloons and your favorite junk food to welcome you ‘home.’ Natasha and Bradley had brought all of your clothes and a few of your pictures, too, to help make it seem a little more like home. Over a glass of a virgin Bee’s Knees, whipped up by Penny who asked you if you were taking your medicine with a motherly look, you caught Jake’s eye across the small living room as he spoke with Callie. He smiled and raised his beer in your direction with a wink.
Oh, what an asshole. It should not be allowed for him to look like that and not want to kiss him senseless. Or have him kiss you senseless. Either way, someone should be getting kissed senseless. But he had been almost resolute in not kissing you. A small voice at the back of your mind whispered that maybe all of this, the stalking, the blood, the stress, the hospital stay, had all been too much for him. That you had been too much for him.
But he had been sweet. He kissed your cheeks, your temples, the tip of your nose. He held your hand and made you smile and laugh when you needed it most. He wanted to be near you. Didn’t he? You hoped so. He never seemed to care when you called in the middle of the night with another nightmare filled with Luke and hidden knives, making the drive across base to sit with you in the low light of your temporary living room, sipping on hot chocolate and watching Golden Girls reruns in silence until you fell asleep again. “If you call, I’ll come,” he had said. And he did. Every time. Didn’t make it any less confusing though.
It was entirely unsurprising to be put onto desk duty when you were finally able to report back to base two days later. Admiral Bates was kind and popped his head into your office every other hour to make sure you were comfortable. “You can leave at any time, if needed. Please take it easy.” Admiral Simpson also seemed to be doing the most to not even give you paperwork to do. They were being kind but you were so bored. It didn’t feel like you worked if you didn’t have oil soaked into your skin by lunch. The other ADs kept you up to date on what each of the jets needed every day so you could jump right back in when you were cleared for it.
You actually volunteered to take on the extra paperwork from the other ADs so you could still feel like you were contributing a few days into your new duties. It sometimes had you staying later than everyone else but you slowly started to enjoy the quiet of your office when almost everyone had gone home, especially on Fridays before the start of the weekend.
Almost everyone.
A knock at your door had you looking up to see Jake leaning against the frame and you hated how your heart leapt at the sight of him…and how the sleeve of his service khakis strained against the bulk of his arm. “Hey, darlin’.”
“Hey stranger,” you replied, setting your pen down. With the outgoing of the Top Gun graduates and the incoming of a new class, Jake had been busy alongside most of the Daggers. There were rumblings of a deployment, too, so you tried not to take his absence personally. If you had been out in the hangar or on the flight line, you would have seen more of him. Also, a lot of your free time was filled with check ups with your doctor and your new therapist. Both seemed to be hopeful for you. Your writing was going well, too, if you did say so yourself. Both Natasha and Bradley were still buzzing in that new relationship glow and you were so happy for them to finally be together—you even made sure to have them do the necessary paperwork as soon as possible so nothing would take them off guard. Detective White and the rest of the cops on your case were apparently following leads about Luke’s whereabouts but didn’t have much more to say other than, “when we know something, we will let you know.” You tried not to dwell on it, focusing on what made you happy. And you hardly left base anyway.
“I’ve got a question for you.” He walked into your office with a smirk playing on his mouth and an arm tucked behind his back.
“I’ve got an answer.”
When he reached the edge of your desk, he pulled an almost comically large bouquet of flowers out from behind his back. It was a beautiful mix of sunflowers, peonies, and tulips and you took them carefully as you stood, your heart in your throat. “These are for you.”
“They’re gorgeous, but that is not a question, you know. Questions are meant to gain an answer, or elicit information from another party-”
Jake groaned, rolling his eyes. “Busting my balls after I give you flowers? I should have expected that.”
You laughed and brushed your fingers against the buttery petals, delighting in the soft aroma of the bouquet. “Probably.”
“But my question was,” he started, pausing either for dramatic effect or just to rile you up. “Would you like to go to dinner with me?”
The smile that split your face almost hurt and you attempted to hide it behind the flowers for a moment before Jake hooked a finger in the wrapping and slowly pulled it down with a smile of his own. “You sure did take your time asking.”
Jake’s smile grew. “Technically, you asked back at the hospital, but since you never followed up on it, I figured I could be the bigger person and ask you.”
Your mouth opened then closed again as an embarrassed heat started to inch its way up your throat. “That…is not fair. You technically asked back at my house.”
“And I’m asking again.”
God, he was something else and you couldn’t help but let the growing smile split your face as you nodded. “Then yes, I am saying yes again.” What else could you possibly say?
“Perfect. Phoenix has a dress and shoes waiting for you in our locker room and I will meet you back out here in thirty minutes, okay?”
“Oh, you thought of everything, huh?” You asked with a shake of your head.
“I had some time. But you don’t—our reservation only has a five minute window.”
You grumbled good-naturedly to try to keep the butterflies you felt rioting in your stomach at bay. “Fine. I’ll be back.” And if your steps to the locker room were a little hurried, he thankfully didn’t mention it. The dress Natasha picked out for you was perfect, midi length with a slit up the thigh with a floral print—she must have found it at the back of your closet. The shoes were sensible but cute, found in a box you had kept at the back of your closet, too. Damn, she knew you so well. There was a sticky note on the dress’ hanger: Have fun! But not too much! Your makeup bag was on the shelf above and you hurriedly touched everything up before meeting Jake out in the hallway with your heart thrumming a happy beat behind your ribs. He had changed, too, into a smartly tailored pair of black trousers and a button up shirt of the same shade tucked in. It was almost unfair how beautiful he was.
Another smile broke across his face as he looked you over and you felt like one of your heroines when he reached out for you. “You look beautiful.”
As promised, he drove you to the ritzy restaurant and you delighted in the weight of his hand on your thigh the entire time as your flowers were safely kept in a vase in the backseat. It wasn’t until you pulled into the filled parking lot that you realized that you hadn’t looked out the window once in search of a black charger.
You felt safe.
He held the door open for you and tucked your chair into the table. It really was like a dream, even when the waitress flirted with Jake. Why? Because he simply reached across the table to curl his hand over yours as you fiddled with your silverware roll.
Gentle. He was being gentle and choosing you.
The conversation was quiet and easy as you ordered and you tried not to laugh when your original waitress was nowhere to be found.
“There’s this Italian place a little up the coast. We should try that next.”
While you enjoyed this peaceful bubble, you couldn’t resist poking at him like you always did. You cocked an eyebrow as you cut into your perfectly done steak. It almost melted in your mouth as you saw Jake glance at you as he cut into his own. “Oh, I was presumptuous by thinking we should get ice cream after this but you’re already planning the next date?”
His fork froze just in front of his mouth and you watched his eyes go wide for a moment. “I…”
“Relax. I’m always game for pasta.”
Jake’s answering smile split his face and couldn’t hide the tinge of pink on his cheeks. “Good. That’s good.”
As promised (after bickering over who got to pay for dinner), you had Jake pull over into the parking lot of a small ice cream shop on the way back to base and you each ordered their version of snickers ice cream. You both happily ate it as it tried to melt down to your fingers when you watched the moon’s reflection over the ocean after Jake found an overlook a few minutes down the road. As you licked the remnants of the treat from your lips, Jake hopped out of the truck and you watched him jog over to your side and pull open the door. He reached over you for a moment, letting his expensive cologne flood your senses again, and turned up the radio. Some old country song—yes, you would make fun of him for this later—filled the truck but you still put your hand in Jake’s when he held out a hand for you to take.
“Dance with me?”
The singer crooned about love and the moon and you laughed as Jake spun you under his arm. This could have been a scene from one of your books, you could scurry home after this, write it all down, and sell a million copies of your next book just because of this scene. But you knew you wanted to keep this just for yourself. This was just for you and Jake. You’d never feel like this before; happy, desired, fulfilled but hopeful for more. Hopeful for more with Jake.
Just for a few beats of the song, you wished you hadn’t waited so long. Hadn’t tried so hard to keep him at arm’s length. Hadn’t let Luke win for so long.
One song turned into two, turned into three and you only separated because a car drove by and honked obnoxiously. You laughed and pushed your face into Jake’s chest for a moment, listening to the rumble of his own chuckle. When your giggles subsided, you tilted your head to smile at him, probably looking like a loon but you hardly cared when he brushed his knuckles against your cheek.
He leaned in slowly, giving you enough time to pull away if you wanted, but you didn’t move. His lips pressed against yours gently before you surged forward, making it abundantly clear that you were not going anywhere. His warm hands held you firm as they slid up your arms to frame your face. There was no resistance when he licked at the seam of your lips, and you didn’t even care about the happy sigh you let out, hands scrunching into his soft shirt. He tasted like ice cream and that damned minted toothpick and you couldn’t get enough, pressing closer closer closer to let him keep kissing you in any way he wanted.
It wasn’t until your lungs protested that you broke away, chest heaving with the need for air. Jake stole another quick kiss anyway, letting you feel his smile against your mouth. “Let me get you home, darlin’.”
You nodded with a smile you hoped wasn’t too wide and let him buckle you in after he opened the truck door for you again. The smile, however, couldn’t be contained when his hand once again found a home on your thigh. When he pulled into the small parking lot in front of the stretch of temporary housing buildings, you let out a laugh when Jake all but bolted out of his seat to run around to your side of the truck and open your door, your flowers in hand. You slipped your hand into the crook of his offered arm and let him walk you toward your door.
“I had a great time tonight,” you murmured as you looked at him out of the corner of your eye. The dim light from the nearest streetlight cast him in a buttery light and almost made him look like some sort of old Hollywood leading man—you’d never tell him that. His ego was big enough.
“I did, too.” The warmth in his tone matched the soft look he sent you as you stepped up to your door.
You could have asked about the Italian restaurant he had mentioned earlier or bargained with him that you get to pay for dinner next time and he could pay for dessert as a reversal of what happened tonight, but instead, you listened to the butterflies in your stomach and asked, “would you like to come inside?”
Jake paused for a moment before nodding, almost hesitant.
You unlocked the door and waved him in, watching as he set your flowers on the small table beside the door. After setting your purse on the couch, you turned to face Jake and tried to resist the urge to wipe your slightly sweaty palms on your dress as you kicked off your shoes. Maybe you had misread everything. Or maybe he was still trying to “treat you right,” by his standards and take things slow. You wanted to respect what he wanted. “You don’t have to stay, Ken.” But god, you wanted him to.
Jake huffed before shaking his head. “You gotta know that I don’t want to leave, Punch. But I don’t want to hurt you. I would never-”
“I’m okay,” you let out in a rush. “I promise.” The smile you tried to keep from your face pushed its way free anyway as you shuffled a little closer to him.
“And I want to keep you that way.” Jake shook his head and you almost shivered when he let his fingers trail down your arms before dropping back to his sides, like he just needed to touch you. “Trust me, there’s nothing more I’d like than to keep this date going, but I would not be able to live with myself if I set you back in your recovery because I did something.” The slightest bit of pink dusted his cheeks as he said that, too.
It was so sweet. So adorably kind that all you could do was smile. “I’m not in danger of dying right now, Ken.”
“That’s not funny.”
You sighed and reached out to grasp his hands, pulling at them until they were pressing at your hips. “I’m here. Upright and mobile. I’m okay.”
“Your doctor said-”
“That I was cleared yesterday,” you said with a growing smile. That appointment had been a bright spot of your week for several reasons.
There was a slight pause before his hands tightened on your hips. “Yeah?”
“Yeah, Ken.”
You felt his fingers drum against the low of your back before he leaned closer. “So, for twenty four hours, this entire date, I’ve been trying to be a gentleman and you-”
“Oh, just kiss me.”
And he did. His kiss immediately dominated all of your senses, hot, heavy, and hard. Your back hit the wall beside the door and you could feel Jake’s smile again as you giggled against his mouth. This was perfect.
The smile faded as Jake’s mouth slid down the side of your neck, no doubt feeling your thrumming pulse, and a breathy moan slipped from between your lips.
“I’ve hardly touched you,” Jake said, words vibrating against your heated skin as you let your hands grasp at his shoulders, needing to anchor yourself to something. “You already singin’ for me?”
Your laugh was just as embarrassingly breathy, too. “Can’t help it.” You really couldn’t. Every nerve ending was starting to spark and burn delightfully, your mind already hazing. He kissed you again and his grip tightened on your waist before trailing up your sides.
He pulled back just enough to breathe against your lips. “You want this?”
The question cleared your mind for a moment but only served to send a bolt of soft warmth straight through you. “I do. I want you, I want this,” you whispered in return.
You could feel his answering smile before he kissed you again, harder and bordering on desperate.
You wanted him.
He wanted you.
Jake pawed at the top of your dress until your breasts were spilling out, nipples instantly hardening against the air conditioned chill of your room. “Fucking beautiful,” Jake muttered before diving down to press a searing kiss right over the swell of your heart. His large hands yanked the rest of your dress down just enough for him to grab at your chest, squeezing your breasts together as he lathed attention on one and then the other and then back again. Kisses turned into licks, turned into the lightest scrapes of his teeth that had your breath stuttering and knees shaking.
“Jake…” Your voice was little more than a moan, torn from your throat.
Big sea glass green eyes peered up at you, nearing sparkling in the low light of the room, as he continued to bite and suck and kiss at the exposed skin. But then, as if knowing you were already too far gone for words, his lips closed around a nipple and tugged, pulling a keening whimper from you as your hands wove through his short blond hair, drawing him closer. The heat of him, of his talented mouth, was all consuming. You couldn’t control the tightening in your lower stomach, nor the whimpers that left your kiss-bitten lips as he switched to the other side.
“So perfect,” he said, words muffled as he burrowed his nose into your sternum. “Perfect for me.” He glanced up and your heart stuttered at the heat in his gaze. The green of his eyes was nearly entirely gone, eaten by the black of his pupil.
Your grip on his hair tightened the slightest bit, dragging him up again to press an open mouthed kiss against his wanting lips. “Take me to bed,” you panted.
It was a blessedly short trip to the bed on the other side of the room and as soon the backs of your knees hit the soft bedding his hands skimmed up your sides, dragging your dress with it. His lips followed, lathing heat against your skin and up your sternum. Then he slowly, carefully pulled the offending fabric off, taking care to not jerk your arms up too high or too quickly. But his attention was soon back on your skin, pressing his mouth against the swell of your breasts.
“So fucking beautiful,” he said, words muffled against your heated skin. He could probably feel your heart beating a mile a minute beneath your ribs. But you knew he did when he took a moment to press kisses to the raised scars that now littered your torso.
It was almost too much for you and you pulled him up and fumbled with the buttons on his shirt before shoving it off his shoulders and then did the same to the button on his trousers and shoved them down before grabbing handfuls of his unfairly toned thighs and squeezing. You didn’t let go when he had to step out of his shoes and shoved his trousers off the rest of the way. God, he was warm everywhere. “You’re pretty,” you murmured against his neck, letting his expensive cologne and heat keep your mind buzzing.
“You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.” You had to laugh but it quickly faded when Jake’s roughened hands slid down the expanse of your thighs, and his mouth followed, sliding along the soft skin on your right leg and then the left, making sure to press a hard kiss to the scars there, too. The simple touch had you quaking beneath his grasp. “It’s only fair, darlin’. You know how much I love these legs of yours.”
“Y-you’re ridiculous!”
“Maybe, but you’re still beautiful.” His thick fingers slipped under the lace edges of your underwear and quickly pulled them down and you just as readily kicked them away. A hot kiss was pressed to your right hip and then your left before he gently shoved you back onto the bed, your legs falling open. Wider shoulders had your legs spreading further as he shoved his way between them and he licked a bold strip through your folds and nearly had you wailing. “And you taste so good, too.” Again and again Jake licked and sucked and nibbled until the heat that had started burning with the first brush of his lips overwhelmed you and stars burst behind your eyes.
When you came down, your thighs were wrapped around Jake’s head and shaking but he didn’t seem to care as he pressed a slick kiss to each of your thighs before carefully helping you set your legs back down before helping you lay further back across the bed. “Yeah, still beautiful.”
With aftershocks still shaking your fingers, you pulled him up again, tasting yourself on his tongue when it slipped between your lips. “Still want you,” you murmured, unabashed.
“You’ll get me. You’ve got me.” Jake curled his body over yours as he took your mouth again. You greedily shoved at his boxer briefs and let out a sigh when you felt the length of him press against the meat of your inner thigh. “Condom?” He asked.
“Got a clear bill of health and just renewed my birth control prescr-” The rest of your explanation was cut short when he kissed you again and you felt him press at your entrance. The first push knocked the wind right out of your lungs. “O-oh!”
“God, you’re so warm.” His words were pulled taut and his knuckles were nearly white as they pressed into the blanket beneath you.
You pawed at his shoulders as he sunk further, further, further. God, he was so deep. “J-Jake!”
“Almost there, darlin’, you’re taking me so well.”
When his hips finally touched yours, each breath was ragged and short as you tried to breathe through the burn that came with his size. He was so deep. Jake pressed gentle kisses across your jaw, murmuring to take all the time you needed but you saw his arms shaking on either side of your head.
“Move,” you said.
“You sur-”
“Move!” You laughed, but it was quickly taken over by a broken moan with Jake’s first thrust. Every drag and pull of him had new sparks sizzling up your spine until you were nothing more than a heap of shaking limbs and heated skin. “Jake, please!” It was all you could say. What you were pleading for, you wouldn’t be able to articulate, but it didn’t matter because Jake seemed to know as his thrusts grew more forceful, pushing you further up the bed and dragging a hand down your leg to squeeze at the dough of your thigh and having it tighten around his hip so he could reach further into you. “Jake!”
“Give it to me, darlin’. C’mon. I know you can.” His whispered words were scalding against your ear and you let out a wail as he hit something deep inside you again again again again. The feeling only grew when his hands swept beneath you on the bed and hauled your hips higher as he drove into you. “Is that it? That where you need me?”
All you could do was moan and hang on as he continued to hit that spot you had never known existed. Your legs lifted, too, wrapping around his waist and that seemed to be the right thing to do as Jake slid one hand down to grab at one, widening you up to his thrusts—and with just a handful more snaps of his hips, you broke into a million little pieces of stardust.
**
With just a few more thrusts, Jake met his own end, shuddering above you. And you were glorious, beautiful, sated. He had never seen anyone look so wonderfully undone as you. Jake pushed up onto his knees and could only smile down at you before stealing a kiss against your mouth and then another and another until he got what he wanted: a soft laugh, breathy and satisfied, if he did say so himself. The simple sound had his already thundering heart leaping. Then you reached up and pushed a few errant strands of hair away from his forehead. The words he wanted to say were on the tip of his tongue but he bit them back—he wanted to tell you with flowers and something sweet, not when you could think he was just caught up in the endorphin rush.
“You’re impossible, you know,” you said, snapping him out of his train of thought.
“What?”
“You’re still so pretty after all that? Impossible.” You punctuated it with a soft tug at his hair before your hand swept to his cheek and your thumb smoothed an easy path on the half moon beneath his eye.
God. He could look at you forever. “If I’m pretty, then you’re-”
Your fingers pressed over his lips as you halfheartedly rolled your eyes. “You already got me in bed, Ken. Don’t need to butter me up.”
Jake kissed your fingers before pulling your hand away from his mouth and leaning down to steal another kiss. “I think you should be told how beautiful you are every day.”
Jake felt you freeze for a moment, rigid under his grip. “Sounds exhausting.”
“I’m up for the challenge.” He could have said it then, too. Almost did. Instead, he carefully pulled out and smirked at your moan with the movement. Jake swept a hand down your sternum to your belly before rolling off the bed and walking into the bathroom. He quickly found a washcloth and ran it under some hot water and wrung it out before walking back out.
God, you were beautiful. Still trying to catch your breath on the rumpled blankets (and if Jake felt a little zing of pride and seeing you so debauched, so be it), Jake slid next to you and carefully cleaned up the mess he’d made of you. He couldn’t stop touching you. Didn’t ever want to stop, but he did eventually pull away to drag his underwear back on and brushed his lips against your palm as you reached for him, curling your fingers around his cheek. But even with you still on his tongue and your body heart bleeding over him, he felt the first tendrils of doubt start to creep up the back of his mind.
Did you want him to stay? Did you regret it? Did-
“Will you stay?” You asked, voice much quieter than you had been all night. It reminded him of when you were surprised he had wanted to go to Junior’s engagement party. Maybe you were nervous, too.
“Of course I’ll stay, Punch.”
Your answering smile was near blinding and you wiggled around on the bed just enough to pull the blankets down to invite him under the sheets beside you—wow, you both really just fell onto the bed, absolutely no patience. After you washed up in the bathroom and turned off the rest of the lights, you slipped beneath the sheets too, eyes bright in the moonlight streaming from the small window.
He could look at you forever. He just had to tell you that. Some day.
**
Things were good and fun and wonderful. Jake took you to that Italian restaurant and then you danced in your little living room. You went out to the movies and laughed behind your bucket of popcorn when the horror movie victims lived up to their cliches. Jake would press smiling kisses to your mouth in good morning in the shadows of the hangar. But he was also fond of swallowing every sound you made while driving deep and holding you close and you got to find out what it felt like to have the weight of him on your tongue.
Yeah, things were good.
Things were good even when Detective White called to tell you that Luke might have been spotted back on the East Coast—at least he wasn’t still lurking somewhere in the shadows of San Diego, waiting for you. It was good because you only had about a week left on desk duty and Bradley and Natasha were still annoyingly in love and Bob had agreed to (eventually) meet the woman Jake said was “perfect” for him. Georgie had given birth to a healthy, happy baby boy and you had plans to visit in a few weeks’ time with Danny.
You may have still had those words waiting on your tongue, unspoken and waiting, but you knew they were going to spill out sooner or later, especially when Jake kissed you so sweetly. Everything was strangely easy with him and you knew it was a little too early to think of the future when it was so soon into whatever this was with Jake, but maybe it really could be this easy. There were short tiffs, of course, but it was good.
Things were good.
“Hey, darlin’. Can I talk to you for a moment?”
You looked up from the paperwork on your desk to see Jake standing in the door of your office. A joke was on the tip of your tongue when you spied the envelope in his hands. You knew what that envelope meant. You knew that look in his eyes. “How long?”
“Eight weeks.”
“Oh.” You swallowed the lump in your throat and set down your pen with unsteady fingers. “You leave next week, don’t you?” You already knew the answer—Admiral Simpson had been heard talking about it yesterday.
Jake set the envelope down as he rounded your desk and pulled you up and close, pressing a kiss to your forehead, your nose, then a slow kiss to your lips before standing straight again as his hands settled on your hips. “I don’t want-”
“You and I both know that the Navy doesn’t care what we want, Ken. You have to go. And I’m going to be waiting for you when you come back.” You tried to smile but you knew it looked more like a grimace. So, you tried a different tactic. “It’ll fly by.”
Jake pulled his lips into his mouth for a moment before sighing but you could tell he wanted to laugh. “That was a terrible pun.”
“I think you like me anyway.”
Jake smiled then, all softness and sweet. “Yeah, I think I’ll keep you around.” He pulled you close again and had you giggling the moment his lips touched your neck.
“You went on plenty of deployments before me and there will be deployments after-”
“Don’t say ‘after you,” Jake grumbled. “I don’t want there to be an after you.”
The words had your heart leaping. “I wasn’t going to say ‘after me,’ Ken. I was saying that after I’m cleared, you’ll have a few more with me. Okay? It is just this one.”
A small bright spot was knowing Javy, Callie, and Neil were also going with him. You and Jake tried to make the most of the week you had left before his deployment. There were quiet dinners in your small room and falling asleep in your bed as reruns of old sitcoms played on the television. There were quickies, too, of course, that always left your legs shaking and his come running down your thighs. But you still weren’t entirely sure what you were with Jake. He obviously wasn’t picking up women at the Hard Deck and spent most of his nights with you, slotting into place like he’d always meant to be there. But neither one of you had put a label on it. But you remembered Bradley’s scolding. You remembered that Jake himself had said that he knew you felt the way about him the same way he felt about you.
You tried and failed not to think about it too much as you walked with Jake through the muted crowds on the dock near the carrier. Dawn had just started to break on the horizon and your fingers brushed against Jake’s for the fifth time as you neared the ramp onto the hulking mass of steel. You only broke away to hug the others and wish them luck and safety before coming back to Jake’s side. There were too many eyes out here. Your relationship—no matter how undefined it was—was still unapproved and discouraged by Naval Regulation. There could be consequences if you kissed him goodbye now.
But you wanted to.
“You stay safe, okay?” You murmured as you turned to him.
“I’ll try my best, darlin’,” he said in return, grip tightening on his bag for a moment before letting loose again. Like he was fighting the urge to touch you, too.
The most you allowed yourself to do was hug him like you did the others while you blinked back the tears stinging your eyes. You should say it now. Say it. Say it. Say it. But wouldn’t that be cruel, to say it now when you couldn’t do more?
As you pulled back, it looked like Jake wanted to say something—his mouth opened and—
The carrier’s horn blasted and halted anything he might have said. You watched him shake his head before his hand fell to your shoulder. Only the careful swipe of his thumb against your pulse separated the touch from anything platonic. “I’ll be seeing you, Punch.” And then he was turning and walking away, a tightness in his shoulders you hadn’t seen since the hospital.
Something inside you cracked at the sight of it, growing larger with each step he took away from you. Every deployment could be dangerous. Hell, every time he got into the cockpit was dangerous. You could lose him.
And he wouldn’t…
“Jake!” You called out, his name bursting out from between your lips.
He turned back to you, brows pinching.
This was it. You didn’t want to hide. You would handle the consequences, no matter what they were. You needed to tell him. You pushed through the crowd and Jake dropped his bag at his feet and he reached for you just as you reached for him.
Your hands slid over his broad shoulders and up to cradle the back of his head as he curled his arms around your waist and hauled you close. You kissed him. You kissed him and didn’t care who saw as you felt him press at the seam of your lips and happily let him lead you through the unhurried but all consuming embrace; he had wanted this, too.
“Come back to me, okay?” You whispered against his mouth as you broke away, chest heaving. “Promise me.”
“I promise,” he said, voice strong despite the desperate look in his eyes. “I’m coming back to you. No matter what.”
“I love you, you know that?” There, you’d said it. For better or worse.
Jake’s smile started slow but soon lit up his entire face and he kissed you, pressing his lips to yours so intensely that you thought he might be trying to sear the touch into your marrow. “I love you, too. I have for a long time, I think.” And then he kissed you again and didn’t step back until the carrier let out another horn blast. “I’ve got to go but I will be back. I’ve gotta come back to my girl.”
You could only nod as he slowly walked backward toward the carrier, trying to keep you in his sight for as long as possible and taking your heart with him.
**
Jake hadn’t been expecting to be called into the Admiral’s temporary office before he had even put his duffel on his tiny bedroll, but here he was, standing in front of Admiral Simpson, hoping beyond hope that this wasn’t what he was thinking it was.
You loved him. You loved him and he didn’t want to have it ruined by something as stupid as regulation.
Cyclone crossed his arms over his chest before sighing. “I should have you formally reprimanded and have her moved to a different squadron, if not an entirely different shore station. You and I both know that, Lieutenant Commander.” He was quiet and Jake felt a bead of sweat roll down the back of his neck. He couldn’t lose you. Not now. “But I made Kazansky a promise. I promised to keep that young woman safe whenever she stepped foot on base. She is a remarkable AD and has proven herself to be an irreplaceable part of this team. The Daggers are better with her, and she is better with the Squadron.” He was quiet again and Jake tried not to feel too hopeful as the man continued. “I will require the necessary paperwork on my desk by 0700 the day after we are back stateside so I can pretend that you two went about this correctly and I won’t have someone with more stars on their collar trying to rip this squadron apart. Am I understood?”
“Understood, sir.” Jake didn’t even care that he was supposed to be on shore leave for two weeks after every deployment. He would get that paperwork to Cyclone an hour after docking if he had said so. Jake would happily do a thousand pushups before dinner and be grounded for a month if it meant that you didn’t have to hide, that you wouldn’t be separated because of protocol or paperwork.
Cyclone nodded. Just once. “Good. Dismissed.” If Jake sprinted out of Cyclone’s office, neither of them mentioned it. But the Lieutenant whom Jake would be sharing a bunk with definitely asked why he was smiling like a mad man when they finally crossed paths.
Jake didn’t care.
Come hell or high water, he was going back to you.
**
If Bradley asked if you were okay one more time, you were going to steal his lunch.
“I just worry about you!”
“Get away from me, Bradshaw. I swear to god-!” The rest of your rant was cut off by sweet Bob pulling you into a different classroom and handing you a water bottle.
“Drink this.”
You did as you were told and by the time the bottle was empty, you felt marginally less prone to lunch thievery. When you handed the bottle back to him, Bob sighed. He seemed to do that a lot lately and it had only been a week since Jake and the others had gone. “I’m bad at this, aren’t I?”
(The rest of the Daggers had been given a hard launch of you and Jake being together after Callie posted a photo to the group chat—it was supposed to be of her and Neil before they got on the carrier but you and Jake were clearly seen in the background kissing.
Not your finest moment but everyone seemed to be happy for you both and Admiral Bates chuckled after calling you into his office to tell you to fill out the required paperwork—how he found out was anyone’s guess but you were thankful that he was fine with it all. While the stack of red tape was a bit of a slog to get through, you finished it as quickly as you could despite being told that you’d have to wait to formally file it until Jake completed his, too. The stack of paper was kept safely in the bottom locked drawer of your desk, just waiting for Jake.)
“I’ve been told it gets easier,” Bob said with a small smile. “It’s only been a week, Punch. Give yourself time.”
You sighed and leaned just enough to press your forehead against his shoulder. Maybe tensions were high (with you in particular) because today was supposed to be your first day back in the hangar and…it rained so everyone was grounded until the weather cleared. “I mean, whenever you guys would get sent out I would worry, but this feels different. Is that stupid? Or am I just losing it?”
Bob sighed and you felt his hands start to press careful, patient lines up and down your back. “Not stupid and not losing it. But I think ‘s different when you care about the person leaving.”
“I care about you,” you muttered into his shirt.
“Not the same way and you know it.” His hands continued their careful touches and you relaxed a little more. God, whoever earned Bob’s love was going to be so lucky. “If I was a betting man, I would say Seresin is probably feeling the same way except he’s stuck in a tiny metal room.”
You laughed and a tiny bit of tension slipped from your shoulders. “Thank you, Robby. I promise to not throttle Bradley or steal his lunch.”
And now it was Bob’s turn to laugh. “Reasonable.”
The rest of the day didn’t exactly crawl by but you were still thankful to walk out to the parking lot by the end of the day, even if you knew you were still only going across base to watch more Golden Girls with a frozen meal. You’d get through this.
You knew it.
Just as you pulled into your usual spot outside your temporary home, your phone rang. Detective White’s name flashed across the screen and you sighed, bracing for no new news, before answering.
“Have you been to your house today?” He asked instead of a greeting.
“What?”
“We need you to come here, take a look at things.”
You were struck silent, sitting in the driver’s seat of your car. “I…” What were you even supposed to say to that? “Yeah, okay. I’ll be there as soon as I can.” The drive to your little bungalow was done in a haze, you didn’t even remember turning down your street or pulling into the driveway. Three patrol cars and a beat up Cadillac were parked along the curb, too. Two uniformed cops were waiting by your front door and checked your ID when you asked for Detective White before waving you inside.
Just for a moment, it did actually feel like coming home. This had been your home for almost two years and…
“It’s been a long time, hasn’t it, baby?”
The cruel echo of Luke’s voice had you flinching before the faded scent of bleach did. Your next breath stuttered in your throat as you glanced toward the bookcases and the floor beneath them. You had nearly died here. Nearly bled out in your home. It looked like all of your books had been placed in boxes, stacked at the mouth of the hallway.
You hardly saw any of it as your eyes were drawn to the broken glass that littered your kitchen floor and then the terrible deep, dark red paint splattered on the wall above your television.
COME OUT COME OUT WHEREVER YOU ARE
“Good, you’re here.”
You jumped at the sound of Detective White’s voice and turned to face him with an unsteady smile. “I’m assuming you called to tell me about this?” You asked, hooking a thumb over your shoulder at the crude paint job.
Detective White nodded. “Yeah.”
“I thought you said Luke was on the East Coast?” Keeping the angry disbelief out of your voice was a Herculean task—one that you failed, spectacularly, if the detective’s flinch was any indication.
He tapped his pen against his stupid pad of paper. “We had a tip that he was.”
“But nothing concrete? Have you stopped the search for him around here?”
“No, we still have the tip line open here, too.”
“Tip line,” you bit out. “But no one is looking? You’re just hoping that someone will spot him and you’ll be able to catch him this time?” Dragging a hand over your mouth, you tried to suck in a steadying breath that only marginally worked.
“We follow up on each one,” he said as if that would help.
“Sure. Of course you do. Is there a reason you needed me to come here?”
He then went on a spiel about you needing to look around to see if anything was missing or broken because there had been a series of break ins in the neighborhood and they just wanted to make sure that this was connected either to Luke or to the low level thieves before proceeding.
It took you about three and a half minutes to realize nothing was missing other than one of the knives from the block but you had a hunch that it was probably in an evidence bag, if the cops had found it at all. Your anger at the cops swiftly disintegrated into fear when you realized that it meant Luke was now back in the city. Or he had never left. Neither was a great option and you told Detective White what you thought and only earned another tap of his pen against his stupid fucking notebook.
You seethed as you stomped to your car and tried to pull in a soothing breath when you buckled yourself in. It didn’t work. But fine. You just needed to get back to base and slip beneath your room’s mostly soft blankets and pretend this didn’t happen for at least a few hours. Sure. You could do that.
But, just as you pulled onto the highway, your low gas light clicked on. Perfect, just perfect. There was a gas station just off the next off-ramp so you took it, hoping for a quick stop. But, of course, when you pulled up to the pump, there was a sticker over the card reader, stating that you’d have to pay inside. With a sigh, you locked your car and started toward the gas station. You made it two steps before coming to an abrupt stop when a bright red car screeched around you and came to a stop at the pump just beside your car. Whatever. Not your problem.
You heard the other car’s door open and close and then…
“Hi, baby.”
There was no way he was here. No way. No. Every hair stood on end and it took you a stretched moment to even muster the courage to turn to face him.
“Luke…” His name cracked in your throat as your heart hammered against your ribs. It only increased when you caught a flash of something in his hand, shining and terrible.
A gun.
You took a step back and then another and another as your eyes bounced around the parking lot, looking for someone, anyone to help you. And you saw no one, nothing except other empty cars.
“Don’t do this.”
Luke smiled, all teeth. “I’m having fun with it now, baby. I wonder how many times I can shoot you before you actually die? Maybe I should have gutted you, you know, see what you’re hiding inside you that keeps your heart beating.”
The more he spoke, the more you realized that he was drunk, every few syllables slurred and messy. Your next step nearly had you toppling over as your heel collided with the curb. Pain lanced up your palm as you blindly thrust your arm out to keep yourself upright by grabbing the concrete pillar. Luke took a step forward and raised the gun-
The lights of a car coming into the gas station pulled his attention for just a moment and you made the split second decision to dash into the gas station when his head was turned. You nearly bowled over another woman as soon as you were inside, the bell above the door screaming your arrival, and you quickly bit out an apology before yelling, “he’s got a gun! Please—call the cops!”
The man behind the register immediately pulled out his cell phone and you saw him dial 9-1-1 before your blood ran cold when you heard the bell chime again. All the air in the tiny shop was sucked out when the telltale sound of a gun’s hammer being pulled back filled the air. You knew if you looked behind you, you’d see Luke pointing a gun right at your head. Without sparing a look back, you dove down the nearest aisle, nearly bashing your head against a row of chips. You heard the shot tear through one of the freezer cases before the cacophony of screams and shouts of the other patrons rang out, too. Before you could even crawl behind another row of snacks or curl into a protective ball, the screech of the bell came again and the gas station was silent and still.
Instinctively, you knew he was gone again. In the wind.
You didn’t particularly remember the police arriving nor the “escort” down to the station. Giving your statement a handful of times felt robotic, detached. You didn’t react when the responding officers said Luke likely fled when he realized there were other people in the gas station. You barely flinched when Detective White came in and you saw him tap tap tap his pen on his notepad.
“It was Luke,” you muttered. “You can probably see it on the cameras.”
Your drive back to base hours later wasn’t exactly memorable and you sat on the small couch in the dark for a stretched moment until your phone rang. It felt like your arms had fallen asleep as you fumbled to get it out of your purse.
“Hi, sweetheart.” The sound of Sarah’s sweet voice immediately had you sobbing.
Unsurprisingly (but still embarrassingly), Sarah was in your little room within the hour and didn’t mind at all when you slouched into her lap as more Golden Girls reruns played on the television. Her soft fingers traced flowers and stars into your arm after your tears eventually ran out. She said nothing when you had told her what had happened other than a soft, “I’ve got you, sweetheart. I’ve got you.”
**
Four weeks into the deployment, Jake was finally given allowance to make a video call to you—he had been told that he was allotted two calls every two weeks but so far he’d only been able to call his mom once. The entire deployment had been a clusterfuck. Jet malfunctions mixed with food past its expiration only added to the usual stress that came with a deployment of this scale. Having Javy, Omaha, and Halo with him was nice—Javy much more than the others, if Jake was being honest—but he still wanted you. He didn’t want to be away from you, especially not with how things were left when he had been called away. The fact that Luke still hadn’t been caught had bit at the back of his mind daily. He knew you were safe on base but…
The call rang twice before your pixelated face came into view and Jake felt something shift behind his ribs, like he was waiting to take another breath until he saw you again. “Hey, darlin’.”
“Hey, Ken.”
Jake’s spine went rigid at your tone. Even with the shitty connection, he heard how tired you were. “What’s going on?”
Your answering sigh crackled through the connection. “I’ll tell you when you get back, okay? How…how is everything going? Are you doing-”
Jake leaned a little closer to the tiny camera as if that would help you understand what he was saying. “No, c’mon, Punch. Don’t do that, not to me. You can talk to me, remember?”
You rolled your lips into your mouth for a moment. “Fine. But first I need you to know that I’m safe, all right?”
Ice ran through Jake’s veins. No one should have to start a conversation with that. “Punch-”
“No one was hurt. I, um, I’m not really leaving base anymore—but I will be there to pick you up when you come back in. Luke seems skittish with crowds anyway. I’ll be safe there, too.”
“Just tell me what happened,” he said, voice a little harsher than he wanted and his anger dissolved when he saw you flinch. “Jesus, sorry. I wasn’t yelling-”
“I know,” you murmured. “I know you weren’t.” Another sigh pushed through you before you shook your head. “Luke found me at a gas station. He had a gun. He’s a lousy shot and took off when he realized there were other people around. Sarah and the Daggers are on a rotation; someone is with me all the time. Admiral Bates also had even more security put on each entrance to base, too, after I had to tell him what happened.”
Jake nodded, knowing that it was standard protocol to tell your commanding officer if something happened and the civilian authorities had to get involved. Knowing Admiral Bates was stepping up security was a small relief but Jake wondered how quickly he’d be court martialed if he just flew back to you.
“Don’t do anything stupid,” you said next.
“I wasn’t go-”
“Ken.”
He might have laughed if this were a different situation. Realizing you knew him well enough to pinpoint exactly when a thought as stupid as flying back to you was crossing his mind, if you would be able to call him an idiot to his face and say something about using his two remaining brain cells to only make moronic decisions, he might have laughed about it. But he couldn’t so he didn’t. “What can I do?”
You were quiet for a moment before the smallest hint of a smile pushed at your lips. “Can you tell me something funny?”
Jake didn’t have to rack his brain a lot to find something, but he hoped it could keep that smile on your face. “Well, I’m on this boat with another aviator, right?”
“I know how deployments work, Ken.”
“His callsign is Honey.”
“Don’t throw stones in glasshouses, Hangman.”
Jake almost smiled then, too, and continued on. “But his backseater’s name is Badger.”
The quiet laugh you let out would have to be enough for now—it seemed like that small sound was all you were capable of right now. But the tight line of your neck and shoulders unraveled. So, for the rest of his allotted time, he took every opportunity he had to make you laugh. Before he was kicked out of the little room, you made him promise to keep himself safe.
“I love you,” you whispered.
“Love you too.”
He didn’t think he’d ever get tired of saying it.
**
You waved to Bradley and Tasha as they stood like guard dogs near the entrance to the parking lot. They’d come with you without a grumble but they appreciated the pastry and coffee you brought them as a thank you anyway. God, you just wanted to set eyes on Jake again. These past few weeks had been so fucking weird. Not leaving base had been fine, mostly. Having a friend or Sarah with you every night was nice for the most part but you did always feel like you were interrupting their lives with your bullshit. But even without that, the threat you had always managed to ignore or push to the back of your mind was now front and center.
Luke wanted you dead, no matter the cost.
And you, no matter how cliche it was, felt like you had just started living.
People had started to trickle off the carrier’s ramp and you tried to shake off the nerves you'd been living with for weeks. This was supposed to be a good thing. You scanned the crowds and spotted Javy’s girlfriend, Hope, and Neil’s parents beside Callie’s wife, and then you had to squint at the next group you spotted. Green eyes. Blonde hair. All of them. You knew them, didn’t you?
They seemed to spot you, too, and quickly turned course toward you. And then it dawned on you.
Oh god.
This wasn’t how you wanted to meet Jake’s mother and sister.
Sandra was leading the charge with one of her daughters behind her. There was no mistaking it now, they were headed right toward you.
“Hi there!” A delightful Texan twang hit your ears over the excited din of the crowds and you hoped your answering smile didn’t betray how nervous you were as you held out your hand for her to shake.
“I’m-”
“Punch!” Sandra finished for you before she threw her arms around you in a tight hug. And there was little fight in you to do anything but reciprocate. She rubbed your back for a moment then stepped back, holding you at arms length with that same warm smile on her face. “Oh, I am so happy to meet you, officially.”
“It is wonderful to officially meet you, too. I’m sure Jake will be so happy to see you both.”
Sandra laughed with a shake of her head as she dropped her hold. “We will probably just be an added bonus—you’ll be the star of the show, I’m sure.”
A surprised chuckle escaped you, a little strangled. What exactly did they know about you? What had Jake said? “Agree to disagree.”
Sandra was quick to introduce Mia, who also gave you a quick hug. “Kelly and Alex weren’t able to take off work but they’ll probably demand to FaceTime later.”
“I didn’t know you all were coming! Did you have trouble finding the port?” You asked, feeling a bit like you were intruding.
“Oh, not at all. And don’t you worry about us stealing too much of your time with Jacob,” Sandra said with a wink.
It immediately made your stomach twist. Oh god. This was embarrassing. “N-no, I, um-”
“You’re killing her, mama. Let her breathe,” Mia said with a smile. “Jacob probably still hasn’t grown a pair and said-”
“Mia!” Sandra scolded. “Language!”
Both you and Mia snorted (Mia more so than you) before her mother huffed and shook her head. “But she’s right. We’re just in town for a few hours and then heading up the coast to a cattle auction. We figured we could see him for a bit, we hope you don’t mind.”
You shook your head, chest warming at learning how adorably close Jake was to his family. “Of course not. I know he’ll be happy to see y-” Your words cut off in a scream as familiar arms wrapped around your waist from behind and hauled you into the air for a moment as you were spun in a circle. As soon as your feet touched the ground, you turned and poked at Jake’s chest. “Don’t do that! You-” His lips on yours quickly stifled any halfhearted argument you may have had, too. At least for a moment. When he pulled back, a familiar smirk on his face, you were quick to say, “that's so rude. You can’t just kiss me-”
He kissed you again and probably would have continued if someone hadn’t cleared their throat behind you.
“Please tell me my mother isn’t here.” His words vibrated against your smiling mouth as he stood stock-still with you still in his arms. Oh, this was hilarious.
“I don’t think the Jurassic Park Tyrannosaurus Rex rules apply to your mom, Ken. She can definitely see us.”
**
“Yes, she can see you,” his mother said, a laugh muddling her words.
Jake gave you one last kiss before stepping back and hugging his mother, trying to will the intense blush he felt blotting his cheeks away. He really hadn’t been expecting them—he had only had eyes for you as soon as his boots hit solid ground. And the fact that he hadn’t slept properly for eight weeks might have muddled his thought process anyway.
“Surprise!” Mia exclaimed.
He was quick to hug her, too, happy to see her smiling in person again. After his mom explained that they were only in town for a few hours, you suggested getting a bite to eat at one of the diners down the road. That worked for everyone and Jake started to herd the small group of women toward the parking lot, only pausing when he saw you stop to speak in low tones with Phoenix and Rooster. It seemed the pair needed a bit of reassurance to let you leave their line of sight but Phoenix eventually poked Rooster’s side with enough force to have him relent. Jake raised a hand in thanks to them before you rejoined his little group and he let you lead him to your car as you gave directions to the diner to his mother. The ride was short, thankfully, but he was happy just to feel the warmth of your thigh beneath his hand as you drove.
The hostess was quick to seat them when they arrived and his mother made sure to shove Jake onto the same side of the booth as you with a wink that had another blush inching its way up his face. She’d never been subtle.
“Well,” his mother started with a smile as her gaze moved between you and Jake after you all had ordered, “it seems like we may have been left uninformed about a few things.”
“It’s…new,” Jake said, feeling like he did when he was twelve and had been caught with his hand in the literal cookie jar.
“It doesn’t seem new.”
Jake kicked his sister beneath the table and earned a boot to his knee in return. She hadn’t even flinched. “What does that even mean?”
“It means that you guys seem settled, happy.” Mia paused, unsuccessfully hiding a smirk behind her hand. “Like an old married couple.”
Jake felt your eyes on him and it did little to deter that thought of you in a white dress and a smile on your lips walking toward him. Married. Jake knew he had thought of you in that way for months before he even knew what it was like to kiss you, but to hear someone like Mia say it? It felt like…
“Either way, we’re happy to see you both so happy,” Mia said with a wink, giving him an out. “And now we get to finally learn all about you. Jake was pretty sparse in the details he gave about you. Other than your ability to keep him on his toes and the way your eyes seemed to stare straight through him.”
His face was on fire now and the temperature only grew when he heard your laugh. “Straight through you, huh? What else has he said?”
“Nothing. I’ve said nothing.”
You patted Jake’s leg with a laugh. “Let the women talk, Jacob. You can try and fail to tell me that you didn’t say any of it later.”
The food arrived by the time Jake’s ears were burning and you were laughing like old friends with his sister and mother. He couldn’t help but laugh, too, at a few of the stories they told about him.
“Oh, but enough about Jacob,” his mother said, “tell us more about you. What do you do when you’re not keeping him safe at work?”
You smiled around the straw to your strawberry shake. “I’ve had some time on my hands lately, so I’m trying to write a book.”
“You write?” Mia asked, setting her fork down to give you her attention. “What do you write?”
Jake couldn’t resist teasing his sister and his tired brain forgot a key piece of information when he opened his mouth next. “Oh, c’mon, Mia. You’ve read her books, I gave them to you, remember?”
The silence that followed swallowed the table.
It took two stretched moments for Jake to realize what he had revealed and it washed over him like a wave of cold salt water. “Oh shit.”
You leaned forward to set your head into your hands for a moment before sighing. “Did you knock something loose when you were in the air, Ken?”
“I’m sorry!”
“You’re Georgia Torrance?”
You nodded as you sat back with a small, uneasy smile. “I am. I hope you liked the books.”
“She loves those books! She and her girls talk about them all the time!”
It was Mia’s turn to blush. “Thanks for that, mama,” She grumbled. Mia fiddled with her fork for a moment before her shoulders slumped. “Please tell me my brother hasn’t inspired your books. I’ll never be able to read them again if he did,” she said, only half joking if the strained chuckle she let out was any indication.
Jake hadn’t thought about that. Where did you find inspiration? While it may be a bit of a stroke to his ego if you did see him as a book worthy romantic lead, he could understand why his sister would never want to read them again. He watched you smile and set your hand over Mia’s across the table.
You leaned closer with a glint in your eye that told him whatever came out of your mouth next was probably going to leave him fighting for his life in front of his family. “He wishes.” And then you winked as Mia giggled. As his sister’s giggles petered out, your smile grew, but maybe a little less sharp at the edges. “I just wrote about what I wanted most in the world at the time. Someone gentle and strong and understanding.”
“And they’re gorgeous.”
“Oh, of course. I mean, not everyone is going to think all of my leads are their cup of tea, but if someone finds a bit of joy in my book, I think that’s just as good. I wrote most of them when I was at my loneliest, but I think the stuff I’m working on now is just as good. I hope you still like it.”
Mia’s smile grew and Jake watched her set her other hand over yours. “I’m sure I’m going to love it.”
“We could talk about it later, if you want? I’d love to get your input.”
“I’d love that. Really.”
The rest of the meal flew by and you earned a motherly frown from his mom when you managed to pay for everyone’s meal without them noticing just as they noted it was time for them to hit the road again. You and Mia walked ahead out to the parking lot, exchanging numbers and giggling about something he didn’t hear—but the sight of two of his favorite people getting along made Jake smile, too.
His mom grasped at his arm and pulled him to a top with a gentle look he knew well. Jake was about to be told something she thought he should know already. “She’s wonderful, Jacob. And you’re so happy with her.”
“I am happy, mama.” And he was. He hoped you were, too.
She reached up and gently patted his cheek. “You let me know when you want Gram’s ring.” Then, after kissing his cheek and reminding him to still call on Sunday, she said she loved him and she and Mia were gone.
And, really, who could blame Jake for thinking about the antique diamond and white gold ring on your finger? No one.
“They’re nice,” you said as you climbed back into your car a few minutes later. “I might like them more than you.”
Jake groaned, letting his hand find its usual spot on your thigh as you pulled out of the lot. “I don’t think I’ve ever been dumped for my sister or mom. That would be a first.” He then squeezed your thigh for a moment, earning a squeal.
You halfheartedly slapped at his hand as you pulled out onto the road, heading back toward base. He watched you bite your lip for a stretched second. “We would have to be together for me to dump you.”
What were you talking about? “Do you…”
“Look,” you cleared your throat, “I know we don’t have to put a label on things, but I’d like to know where we…stand. Together.” You then steadfastly refused to look at him as you took another turn.
And, really, Jake couldn’t really comprehend what he had just heard. “Punch, I was under the impression that we were together since you asked me to dinner at the hospital.”
You were quiet for a moment before letting out a soft, “oh.”
So, Jake continued, knowing he needed to lay all his cards on the table. “There is no one else I would do all that paperwork for, you know. I am all in. I’ve been all in with you since before I knew that you snore in your sleep.”
“I do not snore!”
“Yes, you do,” Jake said with a laugh. “But I am happy to hear it. All the time. Whatever you want, I want, as long as it is with you. You’re my girl.” This felt just as important as telling you that he loved you.
“And if I want the whole nine yards? Marriage, babies, a home?” You looked at him out of the corner of your eye. “For a long time, I didn’t think I could get any of that, deserve any of that.”
When you rolled to a stop at a red light, Jake reached out to tip your face in his direction. He wanted to make sure you knew he meant every word. “You deserve it. You do, all of that and more. And I would be honored to be the one to make sure you get it. I love you, darlin’. And I want everything with you.”
**
It was good to have Jake back for several reasons. One of them was that he took over all the “guard dog” duties (as he called them) at night so your other friends could get back to their normal lives. And you would never mind waking up to him on the pillow beside yours in the morning.
Knowing that you were on the same page with everything and this relationship was just…perfect. Something wonderful to focus on instead of knowing Luke was still out there.
Your name being called pulled you away from Natasha and Bob’s jet and you wiped your hands on the rag you kept in your jumpsuit’s pocket as you turned to look at Admiral Simpson a few paces away. “Sir?”
“I need you in my office. Now.” His mouth was set in a firm line with his hands on his hips. That was never a good sign.
A few of the other ADs looked at you as you followed the man out of the hangar and you tried to smile reassuringly at them, despite not knowing just what the hell was happening as you followed him all the way to his office. The grim look on his face didn’t budge even when Jake walked in a few moments later.
“Good. You’re both here.” He turned to grab paperwork from his desk. “I don’t want to be having this conversation. I want you both to know that.”
The rest of what he was saying was little more than a dull ringing in your ears as you realized what he was holding, what that paperwork meant. Something cold ran down your spine when you read one of the names signed at the bottom. You immediately recognized it. It was one of the big brass people who went golfing with Luke’s dad. It felt like the world had been taken out from under your feet and you were falling falling falling with no hope for a soft landing.
“We went about this the right way,” Jake argued, voice cutting through the sudden fog that had permeated your senses. “We filed the paperwork, we-”
“This comes from someone higher up than me, Lieutenant Commander.”
“Well, then what is going to happen?”
Admiral Simpson sighed and your heart dropped when his eyes landed on you. “The easiest route would be to have one of you reassigned.”
You knew it would be you. You were outranked and easily replaceable, all things considered. It would be you. And that was what Luke had wanted to do: to rip your home away from you, to leave you alone in the world again. But you just…
“No.”
“No.”
You looked at Jake and saw him already looking at you when you had spoken in unison.
“There are protocols that need to be followed. If it was up to me, this wouldn’t be an issue. Both of you have proven to be professional while on the flight line. But it is out of my hands. I don’t have a choice.”
“But I do,” you argued, turning to look at him. You rolled your shoulders back, wanting to stand as tall as you could with what you said next. “Please consider this my official acknowledgement that I will not be reenlisting at the end of my contract.”
“Punch!” Jake’s shout only strengthened your resolve.
“You do not have to make this decision now.”
“I do. I…I made a family here. I’m not going to lose it by being transferred to a different shore station.”
Jake whispered your name but you couldn’t look at him now. Not just yet. Not when you had all but set everything in stone.
“Are you sure this is the route you want to take?” Simpson asked, a surprising softness to his tone.
“I am. You can tell your superiors that this situation will be wrapped up in a neat little bow in a few weeks’ time.” You could feel both Jake and Admiral Simpson’s gazes pushing into you as you took a moment to glance down at your boots, trying to keep the resolve you had felt only a few seconds before.
Simpson was the one to break the silence. “I’ll get the paperwork started for you. I’ll have it on your desk by lunch tomorrow.” He paused and you looked up at him to see his mouth set in a sharp downturn. He shook his head before extending a hand out to you and you took it with a small smile. “It was a pleasure serving with you,” he said, making sure to enunciate your name and rank, too. You saluted him as he stepped back and then excused himself after a pointed look at Jake, leaving you alone.
“Punch…what are you doing?” Jake’s voice was soft but you could hear the tension hiding behind each syllable.
“I had to. I am not going to let Luke take this away from me. I have friends here, my best friends. I have made a family here. I…I have you here. I’m not going to let this all go. I won’t.”
Jake was quiet for a moment, sea glass eyes searching your face. But then a small smile pushed at his lips. “All in?”
“All in.”
And when he kissed you, you could feel his smile against your own. This was good, the start of something new.
**
Jake knew that the Daggers would take you leaving like a blow to the chest. When you asked them all to come to the Hard Deck, a place you felt safe in, a little before opening the following Saturday after your discharge papers were filed, there had been yelling and finger pointing and then tears.
Bradshaw had been the one to pull Jake aside when you were distracted by Harvard and Yale trying to get you to apply for one of the civilian contractor positions on base so you’d never be “too far away.”
“This is about Luke, isn’t it?” He asked.
“Yeah. Punch thinks his dad called in a favor with his buddies and had had our paperwork pulled. God knows what he said to his dad to make him think this would help, but-”
“I’ll kill him,” Rooster said through gritted teeth.
“Which one?” Jake asked, not laughing.
“Doesn’t matter. Both of them deserve it.”
The group eventually turned into an impromptu goodbye party for you as the bar opened, despite you still having a few weeks left of your contract. Drinks were bought and shared and Jake noticed how you smiled through it all.
“Are you sure this is what you want?” He asked quietly as he twirled you beneath his arm.
“It is,” you said with a soft pat to his chest. “I told you I wasn’t a lifer. Sure, this wasn’t exactly how I pictured getting out, but…I think I’ll be okay.”
“I’ll make sure of it,” he murmured before reaching up to carefully hold your face.
The night continued and Jake bought a round for everyone after Javy announced that Hope had accepted his proposal. Hope showed off the gorgeous ring (which Jake helped pick out) to almost everyone with a bright smile and then Javy asked Jake to be his best man while you were pulled away by Bob and Phoenix for something. By the time Javy had told Jake the entire proposal story and Jake had already started a mental list of possibilities for his bachelor party, you had disappeared from view.
Jake was not entirely too proud to realize he started to panic when he didn’t immediately find you in the steadily growing crowd, but his heart settled when he spotted you on the back deck. You and Phoenix were talking out on the deck, dying sunlight painting both of you with a golden light. You were rolling your water bottle between your palms while Phoenix stared out toward the waves.
You were telling her about Luke. You were telling her everything. He could tell by the way you held yourself, back straight and uncomfortably rigid, only relaxing when Phoenix reached out to lace her fingers with yours.
“You’ll be good to her, won’t you?”
Jake turned to see Bob and Rooster both looking at him. Jake might have laughed if he didn’t see the sincere looks on their faces.
“I will. And she’s doing this so she can still be near you guys, it isn’t like she’s being sent across the country.”
Bob looked at Rooster, some silent communication passing between them before Rooster nodded. “Still, be good to her.”
“I plan to, for the rest of my life.” And he meant it.
The rest of the night passed with you beneath his arm, smiling and laughing with your friends. It loosened something tight in Jake’s chest each time he heard your laugh. You were going to be okay.
By the time midnight rolled around, the party had quieted a bit, Jake pulled you out to walk a little ways down onto a quieter stretch of the beach in front of a restaurant that had closed for the night, so you could watch the waves again, making you elbow him when he said it was “romantic because it was like our first date again.”
“You’re a sap.”
“Tell anyone and I’ll deny it.”
You hummed, a happy noise, and turned to rest the point of your chin on his chest as you wound your arms around his waist. “Yes, I know. You have a reputation to uphold.” But you still stood there with him and watched the waves until you shivered, the night air coming off the sea cutting through your thin dress.
“Ready to head home?” His hands traced slow circles into the low of your back, earning a soft sigh in return. You were content. Happy. That’s what he wanted for you.
“Yeah,” you murmured.
The yawn you let out next only made Jake smile. “Yeah, let’s get you tucked in.”
“You gonna rock me to sleep?” You asked with a lazy wink as you started to walk toward the parking lot.
Jake groaned only so he wouldn’t have to admit that the line worked on him. “Awful. Truly awful.”
You only laughed. “C’mon, Ken. Let��s go.”
He let you guide him up the bank to the restaurant's empty parking lot—he really did love watching your hips sway with each step. Just as you both stepped onto the asphalt, you froze and Jake didn’t realize you had stopped until he bumped into your back. “What is it?” Jake asked, looking up and trying to find what you were seeing but his blood ran cold when he spotted it. Spotted him.
It was Luke, lurking like a beast in the shadows of the lot’s street lamp.
**
“Get behind me,” Jake said, already pushing you to his back.
“Jake!”
“Come out and fight me! What, you have to wait until she’s alone again?”
You wrapped a hand over Jake’s arm as blood roared in your ears. You needed to leave. Now. You didn’t want Jake to get hurt, you wouldn’t allow it. “Jake-”
But Jake gently shook out of your grip and took a few steps toward Luke. “I’m here now, what’re you gonna do, huh? She’s not alone now—but that’s never stopped you from failing on doing anything worthwhile. You really are the biggest fuck up I’ve ever heard of.”
You knew what he was doing, goading Luke into attacking first so there could be plausible deniability. Jake wouldn’t be the aggressor if anyone asked. But still, you just wanted to leave. To leave and never see Luke again. You swallowed hard and moved to stand at his back again, hand tightening on Jake’s arm, ready to run. “Jake, c’mon.”
“How many times are you going to try to kill her, man? How many chances do you need to actually do something? Don’t you think it’s a little pathetic that you can’t do anything right the first time? And when you can’t, you need your father to come in and clean up your messes.”
Luke gritted his teeth, shining in the moonlight. His hands were curled into fists at his sides and muscle memory had you wanting to run. Hide. Or try to calm him down. But you couldn’t, not now.
“Shut your fucking mouth. You don’t know shit.”
“I know that you beat a woman for doing your job better than you because you liked the bottle more than keeping your pilot alive.”
“I was good at my job!”
Jake laughed, low and rumbling. “And you’re a shit liar, too. You don’t even believe that.”
And that was enough. Luke charged at Jake and you tugged you both out of the way, watching in muted horror as Luke pulled a knife from his pocket and swung blindly. When he swung again with a shout, you shoved Jake to the side and managed to step back just enough to only feel the air rush by your neck.
Jake stumbled and you saw his eyes go wide before he pivoted and threw himself forward, catching Luke around the waist and tackling him to the pavement. He reared back just enough to haul his arm up and landed a blow to Luke’s face. But Luke was not finished either. His head snapped to the side only for a moment before you saw the knife still in his hand.
“Jake!” was all you could scream. Not him. Not your Jake. He couldn’t take him from you.
But you weren’t fast enough. The moonlight caught the blade just before it arced across Jake’s chest as Luke threw his entire weight behind the move, shifting them both to the side. Blood bloomed and soaked through Jake’s shirt as he let out a sharp yell before he wrenched backward, away from Luke who was slowly sitting up, poised to try again.
You dove for them and your knees slammed against the pavement, skidding into Jake’s thighs. Your shaking hands wrapped around Luke’s hand and slammed and slammed and slammed it into the pavement until his grip on the knife loosened and you wrenched it away with a guttural scream of your own.
Luke ripped his hand from yours just enough to backhand you. Pain rippled across your face as white spots danced in front of your eyes for a moment but you hardly had time to recover before a punch left you gasping for air—Luke snarled something, drool gathering at the sides of his lips, but you hardly heard it over the ringing in your ears.
And then you were shoved backward, your spine flattening against the pavement with a muted shout of your own. Luke pushed himself up onto his feet, looming over you for a moment, cloaked in shadow. But you couldn’t be scared. Not now. You kicked, your heel connecting with his crotch, and sent him to his knees again.
“You bitch!” He seethed. “You-”
The rest of his threat was cut off as Jake’s arm wrapped around his throat, you hadn’t even realized he had moved. Luke reached up to claw at Jake’s skin but he didn’t falter, even as he thrashed in his grip.
Heaving yourself back onto your feet, you watched Luke’s face get steadily redder and his attempts to get out of Jake’s hold grew more sluggish by the moment. A small bit of you liked it, liked seeing the man who had tried to ruin your life and murder you over and over again be so utterly helpless. You looked at Jake to see him looking at you, silently asking for you to tell him what you wanted.
So, you said nothing. Nothing until Luke’s eyes rolled into the back of his head and he went entirely limp. Jake let go of him after you nodded and you almost laughed as you watched Luke’s face bounce on the pavement just as red and blue lights started to bleed across the street. You weren’t surprised someone had called the cops, maybe they’d do something worthwhile this time.
Jake reached out for you as the sirens grew louder and you happily set your hand in his before carefully pressing your lips to his. “Thank you,” you whispered.
“I’d do it again in a heartbeat.”
By the time the paramedic had cleaned the thankfully shallow slash on Jake’s chest, Luke was being read his Miranda Rights and you had given your statement to the responding cops.
You watched Luke get shoved into the back of the cop car; one of the cops actually pushed his head down with a palm on the back of his neck like a disobedient puppy.
When Jake stepped in front of you and gently cradled your face, you sagged into his grip, all the remaining fight and tension bleeding out of you in a moment. “It’s done,” was all you could say.
“You finished it,” he said softly.
“We did. And I…” The words stalled on your tongue. “What happens now?”
Jake shook his head before pulling you close to press a kiss to your forehead, your temple, then your lips. “I don’t know, darlin’. But we’ll figure it out together.”
**
The dance was slow and easy, you and Jake simply swayed to the beat as other couples moved around you.
“How are you tonight, Mrs. Seresin?”
You laughed with a shake of your head. He called you that more than your name, more than “Punch,” more than anything else. It had been five years since you’d surprised all your friends and family at your Ugly Holiday Sweater Party that it was actually your wedding and he still didn’t get tired of calling you Mrs. Seresin. But you didn’t think you’d ever tire of hearing it, either. “I’m fine, Captain Seresin.”
His pleased smirk grew and he pulled you a little closer. Well, as close as your bump would allow. Just for a moment, he let go of your hip to smooth a hand over the silk of your gown stretched across your growing bump before resuming your dance.
Your fingers inched up his shoulder to push into the hair at the back of his head, ruining his carefully coiffed style. He was so handsome in his dress whites. The tinge of grey starting to grow at his temples only added to his enduring appeal—and he was all yours. “Your speech was wonderful,” you added with a smile.
He chuckled and shook his head, glancing at another dancing couple beside you. Bradley and Natasha were in their own bubble; it was to be expected at their wedding reception. But you did get a chuckle out of Natasha stealing her husband’s dress white’s hat and wearing it atop her carefully styled hair. To be fair, it did match her gown, too. Their son, welcomed two years ago with the help of a surrogate so both parents could keep flying up until they took their parental time off, was happily eating cake in Bob’s lap at a table in the corner. Bob’s wife was making a valiant effort to keep crumbs off Bob’s dress trousers while Pete kept a napkin beneath the toddler’s chin in an attempt to help. Today had been beautiful and perfect, exactly what you wanted for your best friends’ wedding.
“Thank you for looking it over for me.” He leaned down to brush his mouth against yours and you could feel his smile.
It had been a blissful five years. You may have been a bit of a naval cliche, getting married within a few months of really dating but it worked for you. You were happy. Getting out of the Navy allowed you more time to write. Your publisher was nearly ecstatic with the increase in productivity and offered you a new royalties deal. While it still wasn’t Stephen King money—and you knew you’d never reach that level—you were proud of it.
Jake had made sure the house he bought on the coast had an office for each of you and he happily helped you paint it a soft green that you swore helped you write. When you offhandedly mentioned that it reminded you of his eyes, he fucked you bent over the pricey cherry wood desk he’d bought for you after your latest book hit the best seller’s list. If your math was correct (it was), that was when your first child was conceived. Little Elsie came screaming into the world a few months later and immediately had Jake wrapped around her tiny fingers. She was currently being babysat (aka spoiled) by Grammy Sandy while you and Jake took the weekend for Bradley and Natasha’s wedding—you were a bridesmaid and Jake a groomsman, so you had quite a few things to take care of. The house was filled with pictures of quiet moments you cherished, like Elsie asleep on Jake’s chest a few weeks after she was born, and then more rambunctious moments, too, like the last Halloween party you attended where you were dressed as Ken and Jake was your Barbie. Apparently Jake looked good in everything, including hot pink. Pictures of the Daggers and their families were hung up beside pictures of Danny at his first lecture after earning his PhD and Georgie with her husband with her little boy on her hip. A picture of you and Jake surrounding Mia at her wedding a few months ago was on the mantle above the fireplace beside a picture of you and Lily with Sarah, Junior, and Taylor at Junior’s wedding, too.
Luke had been sent away for a few decades after pleading guilty to attempted murder and aggravated stalking. You doubted he would ever be a threat to you again but you and Jake had both been granted restraining orders against him, too. From what you had heard from the grapevine (Beau mentioned it in passing with a knowing smile), Luke’s father quietly retired from his position in the Navy before the trial and all of the relationships he had cultivated over the decades of his service crumbled when they’d learned of how he had paid for your silence. The ordeal had been exhausting and had left you reeling day after day when you needed to relive all of it while on the stand. But you had a support system. You had the Daggers, your siblings, the Kazanskys, your in-laws, and Jake. Your Ken. He never left your side.
“Is my son giving you any trouble tonight?” It was a recurring question since he learned you were pregnant again. Elsie had given you a few scares in utero and he wanted to make sure you were comfortable.
“He’s on his best behavior.”
“Good.” Jake stole another kiss and then you stole one right back.
It wasn’t always perfect. No relationship was. You still had to deal with deployments and growing pains that came with expanding your family, and the infrequent disagreements that arose. But it was good. It was worth fighting for. Jake had given you a home that could never be taken from you.
“I love you,” you whispered after he spun you under his arm.
“I love you more.”
A/N: that’s all she wrote, folks! thank you so much for going along on this ride with me. I hope you enjoyed Xx
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illdowhatiwantthanks · 5 months
Note
Could you maybe do possessive Amelia Shepherd with a strap on, where she gets jealous of someone talking to reader, drags reader to an oncall room and takes what’s hers. Xoxo
You're Mine
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Amelia Shepherd x fem!reader Warnings: 18+ Minors DNI, NSFW, established relationship, sex, strap-on, dominance, some explicit language (let me know if I've missed anything!) Word Count: 1.1k
Summary: A misogynistic new surgeon has all the women residents on their toes, and it seems the only way to beat out the boys for surgeries is by flirting. But your girlfriend, Amelia, does not like it. She takes it upon herself to remind you just who you belong to.
You sprinted through the halls of Grey-Sloan, rushing to answer a page to the neuro unit. You hoped against hope for a surgery–any surgery. Neuro wasn’t your specialty but, at this point, you’d take anything.
You’d spent the better half of the morning flirting and sucking up to Dr. Wooten–the cardiothoracic surgeon who was filling in for Teddy while she was on parental leave. You couldn’t stand him–none of the women could. He clearly favored the male residents, and was known to trade sexual favors for surgery. You weren’t interested in any sexual favors, but he didn’t know that. And flirting was harmless. He was an extraordinarily hairy man, and every time you got a glimpse of chest hair poking out the collar of his scrubs, you were reminded of how very, very gay you were.
Nevertheless, you’d turned on the charm as best you could, but it had all been for nothing. Despite kissing his ass all day, he’d once again pulled one of the male residents in for an emergency thoracotomy. This page to neuro was your last hope for a surgery before you hit too many hours and had to go home.
But when you reached the neuro floor, there didn’t seem to be any emergencies. No emergent situations. No one even to say, “Oh, Y/N! Good, you’re here.” You checked the page again to be sure you’d gotten the instructions right:
Neuro. NOW. Urgent. –AS
The AS was for Amelia Shepherd, Chief of Neurosurgery. She was also Amelia Shepherd, your girlfriend, but you both had a strict no-personal-stuff-on-pagers rule. If she’d paged you, it was for work. And if Amelia said it was urgent, it was urgent.
You poked around a few doorways, glanced in a few rooms, asked if anyone had seen her at the nurse’s station. You’d just been about to give up and at least watch Dr. Wooten’s surgery, when a hand shot out of a doorway and grabbed your scrubs.
“Ow!” you exclaimed, more out of surprise than injury, as Amelia jerked you into an on-call room and slammed you into the door, reaching behind you to lock it.
You didn’t even have time to question why you were there before her lips were on yours. She kissed you hard, so hard it almost hurt. And the force with which she held you there, hands on your waist–you knew you’d have bruises tomorrow.
“Amy,” you groaned, when she came up for air. “The pagers are for surgery, not sex!”
“That was before,” she said, yanking your pants down.
“Jesus Christ!” you exclaimed, blushing. “Before what!?”
Despite your confusion, you could already feel yourself getting aroused. It didn’t take much with Amelia. It never did.
“I saw you,” she said, accusingly, making you gasp as she ran her fingers through your folds. “Flirting with that cardio surgeon.”
“Wooten!?” you said, laughing a little, then wincing as Amelia sank her teeth into your pulse point. “Honey. He’s a pig. I’m just trying to get on a surgery.”
“I don’t like it when you fuck with other surgeons,” she seethed, kneading your breasts in her hands, a mixture of pain and pleasure.
“I’m not fucking with anyone but you,” you protested. Amelia heaved in front of you, her face a mixture of anger and jealousy and, beneath it all, fear.
“Prove it,” she said, pulling down her own pants to reveal a thick, purple strap-on.
You startled. “Did you wear a strap to work?!”
“No talking,” she said, turning you around and shoving you into the wall face-first. You whimpered as she traced the strap over your entrance, teasing you. “The only thing I want to hear from you is who you belong to.”
You rolled your eyes. Who knew Dr. Amelia Shepherd was so insecure? She shoved herself into you without warning and you gasped, squirming and trying to adjust to the feeling of her inside you. But Amelia didn’t give you any time. She started thrusting into you, her hips ramming into your ass again and again. It was just the right amount of painful to drive you over the edge and you felt yourself pushing back, eager to feel Amelia deeper and deeper inside of you.
“Who do you belong to?” Amelia asked, her voice rough with lust and effort.
“You,” you whined, reaching down to circle your clit with your fingers.
“Again.”
“You.”
“That’s right,” she confirmed, grabbing onto your hips and pulling you toward her for more friction. “Who else makes you feel this good?”
You moaned. It was getting harder and harder to form coherent thoughts, let alone words. “Only you,” you whimpered.
Amelia could tell you were about to come, could hear your ragged breathing, feel the way you pressed into her harder and harder. She grabbed your hair and tugged and you cried out. “Amy, I’m gonna come!"
“You’re mine,” Amelia hissed, her breath hot in your ear as you tumbled over the edge, legs shaking, bracing yourself against the wall. “Say it.”
You covered your mouth with your hands in an effort to stifle your moans and whimpers; you were all too aware that the on-call rooms weren’t sound proof. You felt another stab of pleasure shoot through you as Amy tugged your hair once more, placing an open-mouthed kiss on your cheek. You heaved and shook, and she held you up, strong arms around your waist.
“I’m yours, Amy,” you heaved, wiping sweat from your forehead. “I’m only yours, you know that.”
You turned around to look at her, and you saw that she still looked scared, almost sad. You placed a hand on her cheek and leaned in to meet her eyes. “Amy. It’s only you for me, okay? You don’t need to worry.”
“You’re mine,” she whispered, leaning her forehead on your shoulder. It was halfway between a question and a statement.
“I’m yours,” you confirmed, running a hand through her hair, and she let out a shaky sigh. You chuckled a little as she melted into you. “Next time just say you’re jealous.”
She swatted at your arm, but beamed at you, leaning in for one more kiss.
“Sorry,” she said sheepishly, undoing the strap.
“Well, I’m certainly not.” You smirked, pulling your pants back up. You placed a kiss on the corner of Amelia’s mouth, grinning. “I gotta get back to my actual job. See you later, Dr. Shepherd. Thanks for the break.”
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steddieas-shegoes · 2 years
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Read Supportive Uncle Wayne Series Part 1 first :)
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Eddie and Steve slept for hours, while Wayne sat waiting. He kept a few crossword puzzles by his designated chair for the times he sat with Eddie, but this time, he couldn’t focus on anything but the way Steve and Eddie kept moving closer to each other in small ways in their sleep.
He’d considered waking Steve up a few times just so he didn’t have to watch his back and neck bend at such an impossible angle.
But god, he was resting.
Wayne wasn’t interrupting any sleep that boy got.
But he watched them both curl into each other incrementally, barely moving, yet always closer together every time Wayne looked at them.
Steve’s face was almost completely buried against Eddie’s “good” hip. If you asked Wayne, he didn’t have a good hip, he just had less stitches on one side.
Eddie’s right hand was placed in Steve’s on the bed, and his left hand was holding onto Steve’s hair for dear life. Like if he let go, Steve would disappear entirely.
From what Wayne knew of Steve so far, he wouldn’t be going anywhere unless he was physically forced.
Eddie’s body was relaxed, the drugs constantly flowing through the IV probably keeping him from experiencing any major pain. He had more stitches in his body than a sweater, and Wayne had no idea how he would heal physically or mentally from any of what happened.
But Wayne was honestly more worried for Steve.
Steve, the boy who had been exhausted since he was a small child, the boy who had refused medical care to make sure Eddie wasn’t alone or scared, the boy always secretly ready to let someone down.
He knew Richard Harrington. He knew how much of a showboat he was, how he never did anything unless it benefitted him personally or led to financial gain. Wayne even remembered shortly after Steve was born, he took an ad in the newspaper for a nanny who was willing to work ‘most days of the week and some nights, minimum wage, cooking and cleaning expected.’ Within a week, Richard and his wife Anne, were gone more than they were home.
Wayne wasn’t much for socializing or he probably would have caught Steve out and about with the nanny often. God knows Richard and Anne weren’t going to run errands.
But looking at the young adult in front of him, he had to think maybe it was a good thing Richard didn’t dig his claws in too deep. He knew if he had, Eddie would have been sitting alone right now, and Steve would be at some Ivy League college becoming something he didn’t even realize he didn’t want until it was too late.
Eddie visibly tensed, his body suddenly going rigid.
Steve was awake and fretting over Eddie before Wayne could even stand up from his chair.
“What hurts? Is it your side? I was hurting you wasn’t I? I’m sorry, Eds, really. I didn’t…”
“Steve. Please shut up. I wanted you there.”
Wayne noticed when Eddie spoke, his voice was raspy from disuse. He was still tense, but he was forcing a smile for Steve’s sake.
Wayne wasn’t having that. No matter how much Steve cared about Eddie, and Eddie cared about Steve, he wasn’t about to let either of them lie about their health.
“I’ll go get the nurse.”
Steve and Eddie both turned to look at Wayne when he spoke, cheeks red with embarrassment.
“Oh, didn’t know you were here.”
Eddie was still forcing a smile, but now it was pointed at Wayne like he wouldn’t see how fake it was.
Like he didn’t know all of Eddie’s tells since he was 13 and trying to hide how scared he was about living with him.
Wayne didn’t respond, just left the room to grab Janet, who sat alone at the nurse’s station during calmer periods in the chaos.
He hurried back in while she got the doctor on staff to see that Steve was helping Eddie adjust himself a bit in bed.
“Damn bats, Jesus Christ!”
Eddie let out a loud yelp and Steve froze.
“What was that?”
“What wasn’t it at this point?”
Eddie was breathing heavily, and his heart monitor started beeping more frantically.
“Son, you need to sit still until the doctor gets in here.”
Wayne wasn’t about to watch him hurt himself more and it didn’t seem like Steve knew how to make it better or stop him on his own.
“My side hurts like this.”
“I think your side will hurt any which way you try to be.”
Steve placed a hand on Eddie’s cheek, gently turning his face so he was looking at only Steve.
“You can be still for a minute, right? For me?”
Wayne’s eyebrows shot up to his hairline.
“Yeah.”
Wayne’s jaw was practically on the floor.
He’d been in charge of Eddie for 7 years and had never once been able to get him to listen the first time. Not a single time.
Before he could say anything, the doctor came in, followed by a handful of nurses, including Janet.
Janet sent him a smile, but hurried over to stand next to the doctor at Eddie’s bed.
“Well, Mr. Munson. You sure are lucky.”
“I’ll feel a lot luckier when I’m not in pain.”
“Where does it hurt?”
Eddie glared at the doctor. Steve glared at Eddie.
“Mostly my side. My chest hurts a little and my left hip and leg are sore.”
“Your left side is in pretty rough shape. You’ve got about 298 stitches holding you together.” The doctor checked his pupils and his heart rate before continuing. “Go ahead and start another morphine drip, same dose as before.”
The doctor turned to Wayne.
“He’s probably going to sleep the next dose off over the next 24 hours, so you can head home. We’ll call if he wakes up earlier.”
The doctor turned to Steve, deep frown on his face.
“You, too. He needs rest.”
Steve was refusing to make eye contact with anyone at this point and Wayne was almost certain he knew why.
Steve’s father wasn’t known for being a particularly kind or loving man. One wouldn’t have to think too hard to come to the conclusion that he was harder on his son than anyone else. The doctor was speaking to him in a way that would have made Wayne’s hackles rise for Eddie, and they did for Steve too.
“I think Steve should stay.”
Wayne wasn’t going to let either of his boys go without each other if it meant they’d get some sleep.
“We do recommend that Eddie have very limited visitors.”
“If I may,” Janet spoke up. “Steve’s been here the entire time and it hasn’t affected Eddie’s sleeping. We can’t be everywhere all the time so it would be nice for someone to stay with him and come get us if he wakes up again.”
The doctor gritted his teeth together but gave a single nod before exiting the room. Most of the nurses followed behind while Janet made herself busy playing with the buttons on Eddie’s IV pole.
“Thanks Janet. What’s that doctor’s problem?” Wayne asked as he made his way to the bed.
“He came in while you were downstairs and saw the um, sleeping arrangement. He wasn’t too fond of you seeming so close.”
“We can be more careful,” Eddie mumbled, body slowly relaxing into the bed.
“Or he can just deal with it,” Janet shrugged.
She sent a wink to Steve, then turned to Wayne.
“He should be feeling a lot better now. Right Eddie?”
“This is way better than the stuff I have.”
Wayne shook his head, but couldn’t help but smile at his nephew’s antics.
“I won’t ask questions I don’t want the answer to,” Janet said as she walked out of the room. She turned to wave and then closed the door to give them all some privacy.
Wayne looked down at Eddie.
He was so pale. He’d lost so much weight in the last week, and he barely had any to give to begin with. His hair was dirty and greasy, and despite Steve and Janet giving his face and arms a wipe down, he still had dirt under his nails.
Wayne didn’t know the details of what happened. They said it was earthquake related, but he knew better. He knew if this was just an earthquake, Steve wouldn’t have stood guard by his bed for days on end.
He was just glad Eddie was alive and awake.
He placed a hand on his right shoulder.
“I’m glad to hear your voice, kiddo.”
Eddie’s eyes were glassy and his smile was much brighter than before when he responded.
“Glad you hear my voice, too. Have you met Steve? He’s my boyfriend. Or maybe not? I want him to be though. Do you think he likes me?”
Wayne looked over at a bright red Steve, then smiled down at Eddie.
“I think he likes you a lot, kid. You get some rest. Steve will still be here when you wake up, alright?”
“You too?”
“Sure.”
So Wayne stayed, and Steve stayed. Wayne watched them both as Eddie slept.
Steve didn’t fall back asleep. He looked like he needed to, but any time his eyes started to slip shut, he shook his head and widened his eyes trying to fight it.
“Steve?”
“Yes, sir?”
Wayne watched as Steve’s body curled in on itself defensively.
“None of that. You can call me Wayne.” When Steve nodded, Wayne continued. “Whoever you are to Eddie, I hope you know you’ve got me, okay? I know Eddie must like ya a whole lot for him to say any of what he did regardless of the drugs in his system. And you must like him a whole lot to not leave his side this long. But you gotta get some rest, son.”
“I take naps in the chair sometimes.”
“A nap ain’t rest. Especially not if you’ve been through war.”
“I…”
“You don’t have to tell me. I’m sure I shouldn’t know. But I been there. And I’m not lettin’ ya suffer the way I did when I came home.”
Steve’s eyes were watering and Wayne knew if he watched this boy cry, he’d be done for.
So when Steve’s first tear fell, Wayne got up and joined Steve on the other side of the bed, pulling him out of the chair and into his arms.
Steve was injured, and hadn’t had proper medical attention or pain medication, but he ignored it to fall apart in Wayne’s arms.
“That’s alright now. Let it out, son. Let it out.”
Wayne felt a tear fall down his own cheek. He couldn’t have possibly predicted this moment, but he knew he was meant to be in it.
He was meant to be here with Steve, providing something the boy needed for a long, long time.
He was meant to be someone for Steve the same way he was meant to be someone for Eddie.
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sooniebby · 1 year
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ఌ 𝐍𝐄𝐑𝐃
꧁ 𝙊𝙧𝙞𝙜𝙞𝙣𝙖𝙡 𝙘𝙝𝙖𝙧𝙖𝙘𝙩𝙚𝙧 𝙭 𝙢𝙖𝙡𝙚 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙚𝙧 ꧂
Teaser ➤ the day he fell in love with his big booty himbo <3
Word count › 894
Rating › NSFT
Warnings › Yubin a perv
Kinks › none
╭┈─────── ೄྀ࿐ ˊˎ-
╰┈─➤ BEGINNING
Choi Yubin was an outcast. At least in popular spaces. He had a few friends in his music club but if they hadn’t enjoyed music like him, would they even talk to him?
Most likely no…. He knew he was a bit weird: didn’t talk much, answered in short sentences, and even cute girls talking to him didn’t get his shell to crack.
But he was fine being the weird good looking nerd that kept to himself.
He needed only one friend, Kim Bora. She was way hotter than him—by the amount of notes she got in her locker in home room. But she never got a boyfriend.
Or girlfriend, Yubin wasn’t sure if she liked anyone really.
“Bin, pass the ball.” Bora said, pointing to the ball that had rolled down to his feet. Yubin hates gym class so he stayed in the back with other kids who didn’t want to play. He huffed but pushed the ball back to whoever was playing.
“You’re so out of it.” Bora laughed, a grin on her lips. “See someone catch your eye?” She jokingly looked around but knew it wasn’t true.
Yubin hated almost all of his classmates. All they wanted to do was talk about their looks or something else he didn’t give too shits about.
Oh well, he just had to survive another school day.
He glanced down at his shoelaces for the third time today. It was more interesting than whatever his classmates were doing.
“Oi!”
He wanted to die so bad.
“Oi!!!”
Mmh, what should he have for dinner?
“YUBIN!!!”
Yubin looked up and cursed. A ball came straight for his head and knocked him square in his nose. He swore he heard a crack as he fell to the ground with a shriek that Bora would forever bully him for.
At the nurse, the clinic nurse didn’t do much. Gave him an ice pack right before pushing his nose back in place. It was painful. He screamed.
Never again.
He was allowed to leave school so he had texted his grandmother to meet him at the train station. Just as he was about to leave, the door to the nurse’s office opened and he saw something magical in front of him.
Yubin wasn’t sure who the hell he was but he wanted to know everything about him.
Tanned skin, jet black hair parted in the middle with a few longer strands getting into his eyes a bit. Double eyelids that resembled that thing Bora mentioned about people looking like animals.
Yeah, this guy looked like a puppy. The guy was buff, way more than the average student should be. He was still in his gym clothes. A tight white shirt stuck to his chest showing an outline of abs and boobs.
Yes, boobs!
A slim waist. And the most pouty lips he ever saw.
Yubin opened his mouth to speak. Wondering what the hell this guy was in here for but he looked at him.
And he smiled.
Holy fuck someone other than Bora smiled at him!!!
“Yunwoo!”
That wasn’t his name but he’d take it!
“I’m so sorry.” He said, walking over to hand him a bag of rice snacks. How the fuck did he know he liked them?!? Yubin looked at him as if he was an angel above.
“Sorry for what…?” He mumbled, remembering he couldn’t just stare at the guy.
“The ball. I had hit it too hard. If you want anything else, I’ll give it to you! I heard your nose was broken.” He looked so guilty. His lips were jutted out into a pout while his doe eyes looked down.
Yubin wanted him to look like that everyday. He made sure to use his jacket to cover his growing erection and simply nodded.
“It’s fine. It wasn’t on purpose.”
“Ah,” the guy smiled. Ah he loved this look as well. “I’m Yim (Name).”
Yim? Oh, it was close to Yubin! It was fate!! Yubin was just thinking out of his ass but he promised himself that he would make this random guy his boyfriend.
“Get home safe, Yunwoo.” (Name) said.
“Yubin….” Yubin muttered but (Name) was already gone.
Well, that’ll be the first thing he does when wooing (Name)… getting him to know his actual name.
𝄞
Yubin knew he was nasty. Perverted really. Who meets someone random and suddenly jerk off to them?
Choi Yubin, that’s who.
Groans left his lips as he rubbed his cock in his bedroom. He was still dressed in his gym clothes—having just rushed into his room. His grandmother was surely confused but she didn’t say anything.
Yubin was surprised in himself at how quick he was about to cum. The thoughts of (Name)’s lips around his cock. His doe eyes staring up at him as he sat on the ground as he cried on his cock.
“(Name)…” he grunted as he came into the napkin nearby. Yubin threw it into a trash can underneath his desk and stared up at the ceiling.
God damn, what a pervert he was.
His mind went back to (Name), thinking back onto his boobs. The white shirt that stuck to his wet tanned skin. He hummed to himself, imagining (Name) fucking himself on his cock.
Yubin glanced down at his twitching cock.
Ah, he had a few more rounds in him.
╭┈─────── ೄྀ࿐ ˊˎ-
╰┈─➤ END
Perverted Yubin is back!
His first post was way more popular than I thought!!
I have three other characters that I’ll publish their meet cutes soon next week!
Requests for Yubin are open if you got any ideas for him 🤭
1K notes · View notes
satoruxx · 10 months
Text
NORTHERN LIGHTS.
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✧ PAIRING: kaeya alberich x fem!reader | 4.5k words
✧ SUMMARY: smut, p -> v, praise, fingering, lots of pining, angst, angsty bc it’s kaeya tbh lol, kaeya lore but it’s vague, also military themes bc sometimes we forget kaeya is a captain and i love the knights of favonius, he’s highkey got commitment issues but i think he’s valid, man is whipped tho, he's just an overthinker and traumatized, also can you tell i’m a med student?
✧ RHEYA'S NOTE: first i have to apologize bc this is SO late??? i got this request back for my 200 event, asking for kaeya with the song northern lights by kennie (which is such a good song). at first i was gonna make it a short little drabble, but the more i wrote, the more i wanted to make it a full fic, which is what ended up happening. kaeya's character has so much depth and i wanted to explore it hehe. northern lights is such a fitting song for him so i just had to go all in. but i'm so sorry that i got to your request so late, hopefully you still enjoy it lovely! (even tho it’s not the main focus in this fic, this is technically my first real smut fic so take it with a grain of salt; i don't think i write it that well LMAO)
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it was rare to truly know your own weaknesses, but kaeya knew his a little too well. behind his carefree, unbothered exterior he cared a little too much. he cares a little too much when klee tugs on his fur cape and whines about a scolding she’s gotten from jean, and he ends up indulging her with whatever she’d like. he cares a little too much when rosaria spills just a tad more than usual during her drunken ramblings. he cares a little too much when he sees the discomfort in the face of certain fiery bartender as they speak, and he consistently lies awake and remembers days when that discomfort between them didn’t exist.
it’s a curse, he thinks, because he always ends up feeling too attached to people he knows he shouldn’t be attached to.
even now, his weakness is acting up as he barks orders to his soldiers. they scramble around him as they enter the city, carrying their wounded brethren to safety up at the cathedral. kaeya knows he shouldn’t blame himself but as their captain he feels like he should’ve seen this coming. new recruits wouldn’t be able to handle the hordes of monsters at daduapa gorge—he miscalculated.
“take them to the sisters at the cathedral. sister barbara and the others should be able to heal them,” kaeya commands, clasping one of the men’s shoulders and helping him up to the church. he’s ignoring the now dull throbbing in his side as blood stains his clothes—his soldiers were most important right now. like he said, he cared a little too much.
the nurses had set up a medical station at the cathedral, and in between all the commotion, kaeya’s finally able to hand over the groaning soldier to a nurse, who immediately gets to work.
he then takes a few steps back to assess the damage, grateful that all of his soldiers are getting the attention they needed. he’d hate himself if there were any losses today.
he doesn’t even realize that he’s now leaning against the wall, panting shallowly as blood continues to pour from his abdomen. oh well, he’d wait his turn—only after his soldiers were taken care of.
kaeya shuts his eyes, letting his body rest for a minute.
“you’re wounded.”
his eyes shoot open to see you standing in front of him. he assumes you’re not one of the nuns because your clothes are entirely different. you’re young, appearing to be around his age as you eye his torso critically.
“it appears so,” he answers.
“did someone take a look at you yet?”
“i’d prefer all my soldiers be taken care of first.”
your eyes flash with recognition. “so you’re captain kaeya?”
“indeed i am.” he lets his eyes roam over your concerned features.
you give him a small smile before continuing with a sigh. “i can safely tell you that all the wounded are being treated. i’m still an apprentice so i’m only here to deal with the non fatal injuries. like yours, captain.” you crouch down in front of him, fingers reaching towards his clothing with a silent question of permission. he lets his hand slacken as he gives you a nod and you attempt to peel back as many layers as you can to asses the damage before you’re motioning him towards a tent.
a few minutes later and kaeya is letting you strip his torso bare until you have a full view of his injury. your fingers brush over the wounded skin gently, and he wonders if you even touched him at all. “it’s long, but not too deep. a few stitches and you should be alright. if you’re okay with it, i’ll get started,” you tell him.
kaeya wants to tell you that he’s no stranger to the pain of injuries, but he finds something oddly refreshing about your comforting attitude, so he just says yes and lets you begin to work.
you thread through the skin with a delicate hand and despite the sting he honestly can’t even focus on it, choosing instead to analyze your features.
he realizes that you’re awfully pretty.
kaeya makes small talk with you as you work, partly to stay awake through the pain and mostly because he can’t stop his curiosity. he finds out your name, your hobbies, your goals. you may not have the most exciting life but kaeya thinks there’s something so alluring about you it makes him a little dizzy. he's not sure what it is, but he thinks about it the whole time you tend to his wound. realization hits when you finally finish, looking up at him with a smile, and kaeya realizes that your eyes hold the stars in them.
it’s hard to explain but when kaeya watches you work, nose scrunching in the dim lighting of the tent, he thinks you remind him of home.
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(kaeya has chased the stars for as long as he can remember. he remembers shouting with diluc in the grass behind the winery, the two of them reaching for celestia because the stars up there were so undeniably pretty.
"we're never gonna get them!" diluc would laugh, trying hard to balance kaeya on his little shoulders. "they're too far…"
and kaeya only grins down at him toothily, raising his fists to the sky. "no way! i'll catch them one day!"
and yet his whole childhood went by without being able to capture the stars. as he grew older he started to learn that it was impossible to steal what the sky so selfishly held on to.
but even as an adult, kaeya knows to appreciate the stars when he gets the privilege to see them in the sky.
especially after he finally seems to find them in the dim glow of a medical tent.)
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he hates to admit how often his eyes seek you out after that one encounter. sometimes he’ll see you at the cat's tail, giggling with your friends as you slam tcg cards down on the table triumphantly. other times he’ll catch a glimpse of you at good hunter, chewing on a quick meal as you browse through a book. almost every time he gets caught staring you only smile and offer him a little wave that sends his brain into a frenzy.
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(maybe in another life kaeya would allow himself the luxury. he’d let himself go through the motions for you. let himself stress every time you threw a glance his way. work up the courage to ask you out on saturday afternoon. finally get the chance to press his lips to yours. trace your skin with nimble fingers and have the privilege to call you his.
in another life maybe.
but for now he’ll just keep you his own little secret—a guilty pleasure he’ll indulge in because it’s hard to rid an addiction, especially if you don’t have the will to rid it in the first place.)
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kaeya’s messed up this summer. he knows it in his soul that he’s made the wrong decision as he watches you babble about something as you lean against his bare chest, still basking in your own afterglow.
he knows that he should have resisted the temptation. as soon as he and the troops got back and he saw you sitting in a secluded corner at angel’s share he knew that his feelings for you hadn’t dissolved.
they say absence makes the heart grow fonder and kaeya only now knows this to be true because just the sight of you sends his mind into a frenzy. you could probably feel his gaze on you because you look up from the book you’re reading and make straight eye contact with him. for a second, he wants to turn away but then you smile at kaeya like you’ve never once forgotten him, and he’s putty. before he knows it, he’s buying you a drink and walking over to your little corner to make himself comfortable.
it’s a slow descent for him because in his head he knows he shouldn’t get too attached. he’ll leave again soon with the troops, and who knows maybe he’ll leave them behind one day too. his future has always looked so clouded to him, and he knows you belong in the sun. he’d like to leave you there in the light—avoid dragging you into his darkness.
so he tries to keep it simple, occasionally meeting you for a drink or catching up around the city. but then you’re showing him your favorite place to study near starfell lake and he’s showing you his favorite stars while laying on his back on starsnatch cliff. and he knows he can’t avoid it.
soon enough he’s giving into everything he said he wouldn’t, finally finding out what you taste like. finally knowing how his name sounds when it falls from your lips.
it's more addicting than he could've predicted, the feeling of your breath against his skin as you pant out his name. kaeya can't even bring himself to pull away from you to stop and think for a second. if he did then maybe he could slap some sense into himself and draw some distance because archons above he was digging himself deeper into this hole. but he can't, not when you're gripping his shoulders as he presses you against the wall of his bedroom, whining into his lips for all that he can give you.
and kaeya is nothing if not generous.
so he indulges both you and himself—the perfect mix of selfless and selfish as he guides you to his bed, nimble fingers loosening the ties of your clothing until you're bare in front of him. he can see the bashfulness settling into your cheeks and he almost feels like goading for just a minute, but he decides he'll be nice.
you've always deserved a nice guy anyway.
he tries to push that thought away, instead distracting himself with the heat of your body, his fingers dancing along your skin eagerly. maybe, just this one night, he can let it be about you two. he can afford to forget about all the old promises he's made—all the responsibilities and duties he devoted himself to a lifetime ago.
kaeya ignores the flush of heat crawling up his neck as he hovers over you, caging your body underneath his as you squirm in anticipation. he understands—the tightness in his pants is enough for him to feel the same. but he's not worried about that, not when his fingers part your thighs eagerly, brushing over heated skin and finding slick wetness there as he dips into your cunt. he hears the sharp intake of breath, the quiet restrained moan, and he preens. kaeya revels in the sounds he pulls from your lips as his fingers curl against your slick heat, your head lolling back against his pillows.
there's a possessive streak of something that cuts through him then—something that tells him how he aches to be the only one who gets to hear those sounds.
it makes him slightly sick.
kaeya realizes then—he's been quite stupid when it comes to you. he's kept the maelstrom of feelings brewing in his soul trapped under all his bravado, arrogant and cowardly all at once. he needs to tell you, needs to be honest because this isn't something he can trick his way out of.
but all he wants to do is run. run so far away from you because he doesn't want you to to get caught up in his own ruin. you're far too good for him, too sweet and carefree to be tainted by his sin-laden hands. he needs to run.
but he does none of that, not when he's guiding his fingers to the apex of your thighs and exploring territory he knows he shouldn't claim. because then you look at him with an expression so blissful—so thankful, relieved that he's giving you a part of himself he never wanted to—and he can't even be angry about it.
kaeya presses his lips to the swell of your chest, feeling the rapid thumping of your heart under your skin, and he shuts his eyes as he breathes out your name. you answer with a resounding mewl, catching his eyes even through the dark strands of his hair.
he then chooses to focus on pumping his fingers in and out of your cunt because archons do you look heavenly when your eyes roll back like that.
but it scares him, the way you leave him open and exposed and aching even when he doesn't want to be.
in his head you're perfect, all bright and glowing under him as you chant his name like he's some kind of savior. but kaeya isn't a savior—if anything he's destruction in human form, sent by the heavens to wreak havoc on those around him. he'd destroyed enough already—he doesn't think he can do it to you too.
but archons the way you're looking at him now, from under fluttering lashes and dewy eyes that shine even brighter when they're trained on him—begging, pleading, and oh so trusting of him and every thing he wants to give you. he can't even help himself.
"i know, sweet girl," he sighs, voice strained as you buck your hips just perfect—a temptress, sent to lead him to his doom. and yet he can't stop his fingers from pushing back your hair from your sweaty skin, knowing that he should be careful because he doesn't want to destroy something as fragile as this.
"kaeya please," your breath comes out in short desperate pants, nails digging into the fabric of his shirt and sliding it off his shoulders haphazardly.
"i know," he repeats, reaching down to heft your thigh over his waist as he slots his hips against your own, biting back a groan at the sensitive brush against his cock—throbbing, aching, needy.
"ah fuck," he's almost shy at the way his voice shakes as he lines his cock up, the heat and slickness of your cunt a teasing caress against his sensitive head. he drops his forehead against your shoulder, breathing heavily even before he's inside you because something about this makes him so incredibly nervous. a single desperate whine and the soft squeeze of your fingers into his biceps and he's stilling—breath catching, heart pounding.
for a moment, he doesn't even feel like himself. he's not anything, no one.
and then he slides in and kaeya knows that there will never be anything better—another experience that would feel this right in his life.
he pulls out a little, gaze lingering at the sweat beading at your forehead, and something in his chest stutters. "okay?" he traces your face for any hint of hesitation—of the nervousness that he feels in his gut, but all he finds is a stormy mix of desire and devotion.
"uh huh," reassurance, stability—everything he isn't. his brows pinch, eyes shutting because he doesn't want you to know.
he's pulled out of the whirlwind that is his thoughts when he feels your fingers on his cheek, brushing over his skin gently. his eyes snap open, and even through the haze he can feel himself relaxing under your touch, because the way you're looking at him is so undeniably loving and it makes his stomach flip.
"you okay?" you whisper, looking up at him carefully, and kaeya feels as though you've put him between the halves of a microscope slide to analyze him.
"i'm fine," he breathes out, not a lie but not the whole truth either. "don't worry."
his words do little to quell you, but one roll of his hips has your eyes fluttering, a choked moan escaping your throat, and the sound makes his pride sing.
there's an image then—hazy and yet so obvious as his brain registers it. the implications behind it makes his stomach churn.
quiet smiles, hazy kisses, soft goodbyes—and then the inevitable distance as he crosses over the border separating your world from his. a lone figure standing in the streets of mondstadt, always waiting for him to come back. always disappointed.
you buck your hips upward, blissfully unaware of the torrent of conflicting emotions in his head. kaeya's brain short-circuits, and then he's pushing back, a steady rhythm against your gummy walls that takes the breath out of your lungs. you savor every thrust, punctuated by the sharp grunts he lets out against your throat.
your fingers rake over his back, desperate and needy and focused on one thing only—kaeya, kaeya, kaeya.
"that's it sweetheart," he doesn't have any more control—not on his mind, his body, his mouth. they've all escaped his grasp, too spurred on by you and everything you're willing to offer him.
"'s okay…ah fuck…it's okay," kaeya groans into the column of your throat, not sure whether he's telling you or himself. the clench of your walls sends him spiraling, hips picking up the pace as he pistons his cock in and out—trying to find out just how far he can go.
then he hits one spot, and his vigilant gaze catches the way your jaw slackens, eyes glazing over even as they roll back and a shaky moan escapes your throat—surprised, unexpecting. his ego jumps.
an experimental roll of his hips against the same spot and you make a sound so unhinged that he finds himself already addicted to it. and to tease is in his nature.
"yeah? right there?" he drawls, masking his anxiousness with his bravado once again.
"right there," you whimper, nodding meekly as you grip his shoulders. he huffs out a soft laugh, pressing a gentle kiss to your eyelids like he's trying to kiss away the tears that have gathered there. you preen under his ministrations—it feels a little too domestic.
he understands. it scares him, but he understands. he wonders what the point of worrying is—wonders why he's letting his paranoid brain taint this moment that he'd been waiting for. the only solution left is to ignore it. because you're here, writhing underneath him in the throes of pleasure, vulnerable and trusting and just for him. he should give you what you deserve after all.
so kaeya pushes every other thought out of his head, only focused on you and making you feel good because that's what someone like you deserves—everything you desire laid at your feet.
he presses a chaste kiss to your mouth, paired with a languid roll of his hips as he quietly groans. "okay…." his voice comes out an octave lower, pushed down by the barely concealed need for you. "okay sweet girl. i've got you."
another searing kiss as he breathes through his nose, picking up the pace again as he slams his cock into the spot that makes you see stars. your moans get louder even as they remain muffled against his lips, and kaeya can't help but dig his fingers into the meat of your thigh, leaving behind finger shaped dents in the plushy skin.
a claim—possessive, desperate, selfish.
your kisses become sloppier as kaeya leads you closer to the edge, walls clenching around the length of him, tighter with every thrust he delivers. the chants of his name have become almost reverent, and kaeya thinks his name couldn't possibly sound more beautiful than in that moment. he wonders if he could be blessed to hear it for the remainder of his life, and the thought sends pure unadulterated need through him.
his hips stutter, red hot fire coursing through his chilled veins—building, climbing, overwhelming as every sense goes fuzzy with heat. his grunts become more irregular, in time with the reckless thrusts of his cock as your cunt tightens around him greedily.
his cock twitches as you suck him in eagerly, feeling every ridge and vein as he grunts and groans and tightens his hold on you—unyielding, unrelenting, selfish.
your eyes stay locked on his even as your orgasm rips through you, and kaeya sees celestia in them—brighter than ever before. your muscles spasm, clenching almost painfully as you tremble and writhe underneath him, and he follows you to the doorstep of nirvana with a throaty groan. his hips stutter, twitching and throbbing as he pants out a broken chorus of your name and every praise that doesn't do you justice.
then he drops his forehead against yours, watching your eyelids flutter—celestial stars dim. a soft brush of your lips against his.
your muscles go lax, every guard dropped just for him—trust he realizes, trust he doesn't deserve. he doesn't know how to tell you that.
because even after everything—when you're curled up against his chest, skin warm and dewy against his own, he does not think about how he adores the feeling of your hair brushing against his arm, nor does he focus on the soft tickle of your breathing washing over him. instead he thinks about how he's ruined it all, how he's dragged you into him, and how he needs to let you go before he destroys you completely.
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at the end of the summer, kaeya tells you he can’t.
“what are you talking about?” you ask him, a light chuckle escaping your lips as you barely focus on his words. your nose is buried in some medical text, and kaeya thinks that the universe is punishing him now by making him repeat himself.
“us. we shouldn’t have…” he sighs, shoulders dropping. “i mean, we should stop…seeing each other.”
he can practically feel the way his words pull your attention and when he looks up he sees the way your grip on the book has slackened. there’s panic settling in your eyes, mixed with a bit of confusion. a conflicted emotion runs across your face and kaeya’s fingers itch to touch you. “w-why?”
it’s a simple question and he should have no problem answering it, but he struggles to get the words out, his throat constricting uncomfortably. “it was fine in the summer, when i was back here with the troops. but now i’ll have to leave and-“
“so what?” you question, turning in your seat to face him completely. his eyes drop to the shirt you’re wearing, his shirt, and he feels his heart squeezing.
“so-“ he gulps, head spinning as he tries to explain himself. he doesn’t even have a proper answer—he just knows that this is his only option. because there’s no way in hell he deserves this kind of comfort, this kind of happiness. “so i cant-“
“can’t what, kaeya?” you stress, voice going slightly higher and he only then sees the real fear in your expression.
he pauses, mulling over his words and the bitter taste they’re leaving in his mouth. he can feel the sting of your pleading stare, and he swallows hard. “can’t stay,” he finally answers, and he’s shocked at how miserable he sounds.
you look at him like he’s insane, and honestly he feels like he might be. you’re confused and rightfully so, because there are so many remnants of him left in your space, so clearly evident the impact he’s left on you.
“can’t or won’t?”
kaeya’s eyes snap up to yours, because the tremor in your voice sends a jolt of fear down to his stomach, churning and roiling until it makes him sick.
he regrets looking, because he can feel himself breaking then and there.
you’re looking at him with these shining eyes and he swears that he’s glimpses them again—the brightest stars he’s ever had the privilege of seeing. for a second he thinks the light of those stars might disappear because that’s what always happens. but they remain, glowing against the backdrop of your irises and he’s captivated all over again.
his plans to leave you in tears fly out the window then and there.
he’s reaching for your cheeks in less than a second, holding them delicately as he lets his thumbs brush over your teary lashes. there’s a reasonable bit of confusion in your face at his sudden change, but when he leans down to kiss you, you don’t protest, melting into him even though he’s so undeniably cold. kaeya doesn’t even realize he’s saying he loves you, choosing to murmur it against your lips because it’s not meant for anyone else to hear—just the two of you.
he remains there, in the quiet darkness of your room for the rest of the night, because he doesn’t want to leave your side even after he told himself he would.
and yes, he dreads tomorrow. he dreads tomorrow because he knows that he will have to choose between the comfortable home he’s found in you or the dark abyss that has swallowed his past.
he’s scared that the more he allows himself to fall into you, and the more he finds that your eyes are the ones that hold the stars of celestia, then the easier his choice will become.
he’s been chasing the stars for so long after all. now that he finally has them, why in teyvat would he let them go?
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slytherinshua · 2 months
Text
DEATH'S LONGING
genre. angst. the tiniest most minuscule sprinkle of fluff. flower language never gets old in fics </3. warnings. major character death. reader has a terminal illness (not mentioned what it is) and is hospitalized. just general angst... not proofread. pairing. yujin x fem!reader. wc. 1.7k. request. requested by 🪩 anon from the prompt list but i did slightly change the prompts to fit the story better. a/n. i'm very sorry for this... i didn't mean it for be this angsty.... but don't blame me blame disco for this mess. divider by @/saradika.
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It was lonely in the hospital. Apart from mealtimes and daily checkups, the nurses didn’t have time to keep you company in the room. You knew you were running out of time. You didn’t blame Nurse Park or Nurse Jung for not wanting to spend extra time on their shift talking to the girl who would be dead in a couple weeks. You were sick of being a burden to people. Maybe if your terminal illness would just hurry up and do its job, you wouldn’t have to cause mental stress for other people.
You had been offered euthanasia, a rare occurrence in such a small town hospital. But people pitied you, or maybe they just wanted you gone as fast as possible. You declined it, despite knowing that you would be in more pain. You were still waiting. Still waiting for him one last time.
Yujin’s face was stained with tears. He looked out of the train window, wishing that there was any way to get there faster. He just wanted to see you. He didn’t want to be late; he wouldn’t let himself be late. He was the only person you had left, and if there was one thing he was determined to do, it was to be with you for as long as possible.
He had received countless letters from the hospital, each with updates on your condition. He couldn’t bring himself to read most of them. He didn’t want to accept such a cruel fate. Why were you the one who had to suffer?
You had always been close to Yujin, supporting him in everything he aspired to do. Growing up in a small town, the community was tightly knit. Everyone knew that you and Yujin were inseparable. It was easy to tell that there were romantic feelings involved, especially as you grew older.
But unlike Yujin’s future, which was bright and full of endless possibilities, you didn’t have a future. Yujin’s dream had always been to move to a big city, one with skyscrapers reaching to the sky, one bustling with life and innovation. You were never allowed the privilege to dream as big or bright. It always seemed pointless.
But there was one thing you did allow yourself to dream of. One thing that you had always wanted. To be loved, to be in love. You wanted the same thing all the leads in books or movies had. But now as you lay in your hospital bed, staring at the ceiling and the artificial lights that were way too old to shine bright, you were starting to accept that even that small dream would die with you.
“I wish I could just see him one last time…” You gulped. The small plea was heard by no one, and you were once again reminded that you were so, so alone.
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Yujin was breathless when he reached the front desk. The train station was a few miles from the hospital, and he had decided that running would be faster than waiting for a ride. Usually he would get tired from such a long distance, but the adrenaline and desperation to see you allowed him to sprint all the way to the small hospital.
The lady at the front desk, who recognized Yujin from a sprained ankle when he was 5, struggled to understand his hurried and stuttered speech. But, she eventually figured out that he was looking for your room, and directed him to the second floor.
He ignored the signs stating that running was not allowed in the halls, rushing past the elderly patients whose eyes widened at the young boy. All Yujin cared about was getting to you as fast as possible, and when he finally reached room 204, his heart finally stopped racing as fast. 
He took a second to breathe, wiping the sweat that had collected on his forehead. He wanted to look composed and calm in front of you, as if none of this actually affected him. Although, maintaining that in front of you would almost certainly fail. It had already been over a year since he had seen you. Letters and short phone calls were the only contact he had been surviving off since he first left for the city.
He slid the door open and his eyes met yours. Like a habit, your face brightened, and you opened your arms for Yujin to run into. It all felt like the last missing puzzle piece coming together. You held him as tightly as possible, as if he was the one who was going to disappear instead of you. Sobs wracked your body, your one wish allowed to live on for a few moments longer. The boy you loved was in your arms once again; you had survived long enough to see him one last time.
“I thought I wouldn’t make it in time.” Yujin whispered breathlessly, tightening his grip around you as well. He wanted to memorise everything about the feeling before it was too late, so that the last memory he would have of you would be pleasant.
“I waited for you. I would’ve waited longer if I had to.” You told him earnestly.
Yujin’s eyes stung, and he tried to blink back the tears. He couldn’t imagine how hard it must have been for you. Alone, faced with nothing but the heartbreaking reality that was dealt to you. He felt guilty for wanting to chase his dream, for not staying by your side for as long as he could. 
“I had to see you again before I said goodbye.” You whispered, face buried in his neck, relief present in your every movement, every breath, every word. Now that you were in Yujin’s arms, death’s sting couldn’t harm you anymore. You weren’t afraid. Although you still wished for more time, you knew it was impossible. So, instead, you were beyond grateful that at least your final moments weren’t spent alone.
Yujin shook his head, unable to hold back his tears for any longer, “I’m too scared to lose you. Don’t die, please, not yet. I can’t let you go yet.” He stuttered, brain panicked as he held onto you tighter, as if he could give some of his life to you. 
You pulled back, wanting to see his face and not just hear his voice. A smile graced your features when you met his eyes. Although he was crying, nose and eyes red and cheeks stained with tears, he still looked beautiful. You cupped his face, wiping one of his tears with your thumb. His lip quivered, and he tried to choke down the wave of emotions that was threatening to hit him. He sniffed, wiping his face of the rest of the tears and clasping your hands with his.
His heart constricted feeling how cold they were. The sight of the IV you were hooked up to, distributing pain medication. His gaze drifted to the monitors to the side of your bed, and the small table in the room. He saw his letters still open on the top of it, neatly ordered from first to last. Even the envelopes were carefully preserved by you. He looked back to you, soaking in your features. You just smiled at him.
“How can you still smile?” He wondered aloud, both awed and dismayed at the sight.
“You came back to me. How could I not be happy?” Your eyes crinkled as your smile brightened, a feeling of pure happiness filling your body, replacing the old feelings of hopelessness and loneliness. You touched his cheek again, tracing the line of his cheekbone and down to his jaw. You had only been away from each other for a year, yet he had still managed to grow more handsome than ever before.
“I wanted to tell you something.” You said softly, immediately grabbing Yujin’s full attention. “Thank you.” It was such a simple statement, just 2 words, yet it felt like Yujin’s heart was completely shattered by them.
You continued with a breath, “Thank you for staying by my side. And thank you for loving me even though you knew you would have to say goodbye. And… thank you for coming back to me.” 
Yujin closed his eyes, kissing the palm of your hand. It was enough to convey his thanks back to you, as well as another message. I love you. He knew if he said anything, he would probably end up crying again. It was better to stay silent, basking in the last moments he would ever have with you.
“I want to kiss you.”
Yujin opened his eyes again, eyes softening as he heard your request. He nodded softly, leaning forward to a distance where you could reach his lips. Your touch was tentative and gentle. It was your first kiss, and you knew it would be your last as well. At least, you were fortunate enough to share it with the boy who stole your heart.
It seemed like you both knew that time was running out. As you rested your head back on the pillows and Yujin swallowed back painful emotions, you were once again faced with your unavoidable end.
“I love you. I know it was hard to wait for me… but you can rest now. You don’t have to fight it anymore. I love you, and that’s why I’m letting you go.” Yujin said softly, mustering a smile for you. Just for you.
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“I love you.”
It had been months since he confessed those words to you, yet they seemed to follow him wherever he went. Your hospital bed was long empty. The sheets had been neatly folded on the foot of the bed and the room sanitised, the last traces of you eradicated. It no longer held your possession, nor did it smell like you. But Yujin could still feel your presence somehow. 
Not just in the hospital, but whenever he visited the columbarium just to stare at your picture again. He brought you flowers every time; pink camellias, which had been your favourite since childhood. They represented longing.
Longing.
That was the feeling that stayed with Yujin every day. It was bitter at times, sweet at others. Memories of you played in his mind and made him smile or laugh. The thought of never seeing you again bruised his heart. But he kept going for you, who had always believed in him, always knowing he was capable of anything he put his mind to. While you were still beside him, your words kept him motivated. Now, your memory served the same purpose. Even when you were gone, you were still with him. Not even death could shadow your love for him.
↳ zerobaseone taglist (bolded could not be tagged): @eternalgyu,, @okshu,, @chewryy,, @haecien,, @sobun1est,,
@emmylksblog,, @talkingsaxy,, @thesunsfullmoon,, @chenleszone,, @sxmmerberries,,
@talking-saxy,, @cupidslovearrows,, @dimplewonie,, @50-husbands,, @hursheys,,
@kristianities,, @kangtaehyunzzz
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witchthewriter · 1 year
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𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐒𝐨𝐧𝐬' 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐩𝐮𝐧𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐚𝐜𝐞
⤷ female, ambiguous race, and any size reader. Requests are open, thank you for reading!  
Warnings: swears, mention of blood and bruising, also creeps
ᴹᵃˢᵗᵉʳˡᶤˢᵗ | ᴹᵃˢᵗᵉʳˡᶤˢᵗ ᴵᴵ
𝐉𝐀𝐗
・Not surprised, but a tad shocked. He was used to this behaviour from his mother.
・But when he laid his eyes on you, all he could feel was pride.
"How'd the other guy look?"
"Way fuckin' worse, sweetheart," you said with a smirk.
"That's my girl."
・His arm wrapped around you as you left the station, Unser already pulling strings to get you out. Plus, the guy wasn't going to press charges.
・While getting on the back of Jax's bike you said, "You know what, it felt pretty good."
"I know it does babe, but please don't make it a regular thing," he replied and lightly slapped you on your thigh.
"I'll do my best..."
𝐎𝐏𝐈𝐄
・"The hell did that come from?" He asked as you walked through the front door, nursing a very swollen black eye. Apparently punching first doesn't mean you've won the fight.
・"Ugh, would you believe me if I said I ran into a pole?"
"You hate running."
"Fuck, you're right."
・Out of all the guys, he's the most surprised. It took him a while to process it, the story, the lump on your forehead.
・But to him, it meant you accepted this life.
・From his first marriage, Opie was used to having a s/o who was against the club, but with you - you took it in your stride.
・Completely intergrating with it.
・He pulled you onto his lap, cupping your face.
"That's a fucking big one," Opie said, tracing the outline of the bruise.
"I know. But I was the only one left standing."
𝐂𝐇𝐈𝐁𝐒
・Taken aback, mostly upset because you were arrested.
"You're saying my Old Lady, Y/n Telford, was arrested?"
"Yes," Unser said on the other side of the call. He watched you from the door.
Your head was leaning against the cold brick wall. Eyes shut, nose bleeding, but that was the extent of your injuries.
"And may I ask why, she got arrested," Chibs growled.
"She assaulted someone," with Unser's reply, a smile grew on your face.
"She fuckin' what-" then the line went fuzzy and all Unser heard was "I'm coming," before Chibs hung up.
・You weren't worried. Not about being arrested. Because you knew Chibs wouldn't let you stay in here.
・And you were right, because that very afternoon you were released and Chibs grabbed ahold of your face, checking for injuries.
"What were you thinking lass?"
"Oh honey, I wasn't-"
𝐓𝐈𝐆
・Surprised and kinda turned on by it
・It had been pure luck that you weren't arrested. The Sheriffs had been occupied with actual crime ... not a woman punching a creep square in the face.
・However, once Tig came home and saw the swollen, bruised hand of yours, he instantly knew what had happened.
"Look, all I'm gonna say is ... I'm proud of you baby. You put those creeps in their places. But next time, I want a few rounds too."
・You smiled up at him, and went to push yourself up from the couch but grimaced as you used your hand.
"Yeah, it's gonna be a bit tender for a while. Just relax. I'll do whatever you need me to."
・And then he came over and kissed your hand, examining the darkness that was still developing, the splits in the skin.
"Sheesh, you did a good job," Tig mumbled and went to go get your first aid kit.
𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐏𝐘
・The PROUDEST.
・The next day he told everyone in the meeting what happened and all the Sons clapped him on the back.
"Happens to all of us," Jax said with a wink.
・Not only was happy, Happy, he was ecstatic. Because it meant you weren't averse to violence...
・Not that he would readily bring it into the home now, it just meant that you didn't find him or his work disgusting.
・He's always worried about that. That one day, you'll just up and leave because this life isn't for you.
・But you know how he feels, and it was part of the reason why you gave that guy a shiner.
・He would've been only a few years older than you, but he wouldn't stop hitting on you. Not even when you told him you weren't single.
・So you thought, "fuck it, my family is a fucking bikie club," and you went for it.
・Explaining that to Happy made him ... kind of emotional.
𝐉𝐔𝐈𝐂𝐄
・Completely shocked.
・Not in a million years did he think you would be in a fight. Or at least a punch up.
・You were quite fiesty, and that's part of the reason why he loved you
・But he never thought that side of you would become physical.
"Babe, why?" Juice asked over his bowl. He had made dinner that night, wanting to do something.
"The fucker kept on staring at me. Even after I told him to knock it off, twice."
"Oh, he had it coming then."
・A part of him was upset that you had to defend yourself. He always wants to be the one to do that.
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xxanaduwrites · 6 months
Text
much ado about nothing, major
i. bubbles & battle scars
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gif creds @sakuragifs !
pairing: john “bucky” egan x (ofc) maude “blue” bluell
warnings: this story will contain mature themes, descriptions of injury, blood, sexual content, swearing, as well as, physical and mental illness. proceed with caution.
— i: mentions of injury, death, & puking. (pretty much just maude, bubbles, & croz being a dynamic trio, total bestie vibes — & then there’s john. he’s just there haha)
word count: 3.4k
there must be something or nothing at all
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July 24, 1943 was the date — a date marked in the history books as the start of the Hamburg attacks, and in the journal of Nurse Maude Bluell, an inclusion of her very first introduction to one Major John Egan.
It was just past 0900 hours when the doors swung open to the infirmary rather unexpectedly. Bluell was organizing a new shipment of supplies, placing gauze, bandages, and wraps alike in their respective places, Lottie wa re-evaluating the health passes for the men who were flying today — confirming that they has passed inspection so to speak, and Q — well Q was reading newspaper cutouts of her favorite gossip columns, courtesy of her girlfriends back home. A red cherry sucker laid limply in her mouth as she took in the recent excepades of the Hollywood starlets she fawned over.
For Q, it was better for her to dive her nose into the latest gossip than worry about a certain Lieutenant she had tethered a liking too. A certain Lieutenant Curtis Biddick — "Curt" for short — who was scheduled to fly today. Q would deny the prospect of liking the New Yorker with the heavy accent, but it wasn't deniable to Lottie and Maude who had seen the Lieutenant saunter in every morning just to talk to her at the nurse's station. He used the need for a sucker to subside his "apparent" drops in blood sugar as his excuse of choice.
Lottie reprimanded her every time, claiming that they were only for the patients, not for the healthy airmen — hiding the sugary sweet lollipops from her colleague.
But, Lottie's attempts proved to be fruitless as Q would find them at every turn in every single hiding spot, opening a sucker of her own just to push Lottie's buttons.
And, she was doing that just now — not just to bother the blonde, but to also hold some sort of reminder of Biddick, that he was here with her as much as she was there with him — the cherry red sucker that mirrored the very same shade of her hair — tucked safely in the pocket of his flight uniform for a victory treat.
Alas — in other words — there wasn't much to do until their men came flooding back in waves.
Until there was.
The sound of a door swinging open broke the dead silence that pervaded the medical unit. The three women immediately dropped everything they were doing once they saw the sight of Colonel Harding sauntering in with Lieutenant Payne following suit — under the haven of a thick blanket, accompanied by the the arm of one of his fellow airmen.
Or well — Maude and Lottie did.
Susan was trying to consume the last line of the article in front of her as fast as she could. She didn't want to be left wondering what Bettie Davis was doing nowadays in the middle of assessing what was to come.
Lottie, being under the wing of Doctor Stover longer than the two nurses beside her, did not hesitate to meet Harding half way. "Good morning, Colonel'' she greeted, pressing her clip board of names close to her chest as a means of suppressing the shock of it all. It was rather unusual to see any of the airmen, let alone the Colonel until the conclusion of a mission, especially when every health pass had been confirmed and processed.
"Morning. Ladies," Harding replied to the three nurses present respectfully as he always did, curt, and to the point. "Lieutenant Payne is coming down with something and will no longer be navigating today's mission," he explained. "You ladies mind checking up on him?"
"Oh not at all, sir!" Lottie chirped, setting her clipboard down and immediately swinging into action. She nodded over at her colleagues, urging them to take the clearly pale and ill Lieutenant from the hold of the corporal present.
It didn't take long for Bluell and Q to get the Lieutenant situated and comfortable in a bed with brand new sheets — pressed and floral scented. Maude felt lucky and rather grateful that they had completed that task in time for such a situation to occur. Q was still quite busy with her cherry sucker while simultaneously taking the man's blood pressure, so Bluell decided to do the evaluating — not that she minded anyways. It was refreshing to see a man in front of her who wasn't bleeding out and barely coherent. She could already tell without really knowing that Payne would be just fine. That she wouldn't be losing another one of their men just yet, and that made the weight in her chest subside with the sweetest relief.
"Lieutenant Payne," Maude enunciated carefully, smiling fondly at the poor man in front of her. It was obvious from the sight in front of her that illness had racked his bones. The color was draining from his skin, a dull gray taking over, a line of sweat was creasing his brow, and his eyes drooped heavily doused with a glossy sheen. "Please, if you could tell me what seems to be going on. How are you feeling?"
"Well, quite shitty," he laughed dryly, yet a smile still managed to grace his features and prove to be rather contagious to Maude's expression  in seconds flat. "I was fine. I mean, I thought I was. 'Twas until I was propped up ready to fly, feeling like I could hurl if I even moved a muscle. Major Egan shut that down real quick though. Got me a sub with Croz."
And there it was, a title attached to the name of a man Maude Bluell would have scorched into the back of her mind soon enough. Yet, now – now in that very moment, her unfamiliarity with that very same man would simply fly over her head. Instead, she would find a tying point to her patient in the traces of his explanation, one that made her eyes light up in genuine interest. "Lieutenant Crosby?" She asked while dropping the back of her hand to Payne's forehead, inspecting the extent of his temperature."
"Yuh-huh," he nodded
At the same time as Q announced "one-nineteen over seventy," but it really sounded like, "nun-eye-dee ova even-yee," with that sucker still tucked dedicatedly in her mouth.
Maude's hand dropped from Payne's forehead then, seeming pleased to know that he wasn't burning up as bad as she expected – definitely warm but more mildly speaking – and his blood pressure was relatively normal. The wheels were already turning in her head, coming to the conclusion that he merely had some sort of bug. But, she couldn't really come to one until Doctor Stover came to access the man himself.
"Lemme guess," Payne began, getting Maude's attention after she instructed Q to get the Lieutenant a glass of water. If she got his prognosis right, he would need to remain hydrated to subside the urge to vomit. "He's here quite often ain't –" Payne's words seemed to lodge in his throat then, his features twisting just the same.
The clear indication of his illness brought Nurse Bluell to flight mode and she picked up the bucket adjacent to his bed in mere seconds. "Let it out, Lieutenant," she urged as she situated it on his lap just in time for him to spill out the contents into the bin instead of his bed. He did just that, and Bluell did not hesitate to keep the bucket steady and rub his back in a soothing motion, hoping to ease the strain in his back from achy muscles.
Once he was done, he slumped back against the headboard – his eyes appearing glossier than they had before. He was spent, but that did not stop him from mumbling out his appreciation. "Thank you Nurse – Nurse?" He trailed off, a crease forming on his sweaty forehead with a curious sort of confusion.
"Bluell. Nurse Bluell," she introduced herself, moving the bucket off the bed, tying up the old one, and replacing it with a brand new one. "But you can just call me Maude."
"Maude. The powerful battler," a droopy smile spanned across his face, recalling the meaning behind the name of the nurse in front of him.
"Yes, but –" her cheeks dusted pink, and she looked away from him as she got rid of the previous trash close by. "Not me. All you – All you boys."
"Doubt that." Q brought over the water then and he thanked her kindly before taking a gentle sip. "Call me Bubbles."
"Pardon, Lieutenant?" Bluell stood straight then, completely taken aback by his sudden admission. She took a deep breath and sucked back the urge to laugh.
It wasn't uncommon by any means for nicknames to be a staple pass of courtesy and comradely around base. It served as an attempt to distinguish the tension of a deeply set reality and also comouflague identity to foreign forces. Like Charolette and Susan who replied to Lottie and Susie Q or just plain old Q. It was common knowledge. And she had found herself giving into such knowledge as she adjusted to the shortened form of her surname — replying to Blue more often than not. But, Bubbles. Bubbles? She hadn't heard something quite like that before.
"Bubbles. That's what they call me. Ain't heroic by any means. You can ask Croz the next time he's here, 'M sure he'll tell yuh," he elaborated.
A chuckle escaped her then, a genuine smile enveloping in her cheeks in a way that almost felt foreign. She couldn't remember the last time she smiled – really smiled since she'd arrived on base. "Quite heroic to me,." She flattened her hands across the edges of the mattress, making sure he was tucked into the sheets comfortably and then she fluffed up the back of his pillow for me good measure. "Should rest up now, Lieutenant. I'll be here if you need anything. Please don't hesitate to call us over," She affirmed, and in a sudden newfound sense of confidence or maybe it was simply just the comradery, she found herself adding, "that's an order, Bubbles."
Bubbles – still poorly, shivering, and pale as a ghost – managed a light laugh from his strained throat as Maude left the man be. "You got it, Maude"
Maude's spirits appeared to be more pleasant than usual as she busied herself in the next coming hours. Her conversation with Lieutenant Payne – or Bubbles if you will – subsided the nerves that usually rattled her in deep anticipation of what was to come. However, knowing that Lieutenant Crosby was navigating today still kept her worried.
Would his stomach be okay?
Would the natural herbs she recommended to brew in his tea ease him?
Those thoughts did not fail to plague her mind throughout the day, but she was grateful to have some distraction in the task of caring for Bubbles. She made sure to keep an eye on him as much as she could, so much so, that it started to concern Nurse Charlotte Reign and Susan Quinn who felt as if previous patterns from the young nurse were resurfacing. Patterns that were brought into light the very same day an airmen died in her arms for the very first time.
Yet, Maude felt fine – well, as fine as one could be in the circumstances placed upon her. She felt like she could breathe again the moment the boys returned from the Trondheim mission in the later afternoon. It had proved to be successful – and even more so in the hands of one Lieutenant Crosby who was currently at Bubble's bedside. With a chair situated over, he not only came to check on his best friend, but also report on the mission.
Maude was finishing up wrapping a flier's burn wounds adjacent to Lieutenant Payne when she unintentionally overheard the conversation at hand. "I mean the flak, it came in so hot. I didn't even think about it when I put it on. It – It must of froze, but then these chunks, they start rolling down my forehead, I think 'holy mackerel crosby, holy mackerel, you've been hit!"
"Of course you would narrate your own death." Bubbles laughed lightly at his friend's retelling.
She secured the wrap tightly and comfortably and practically repeated the earlier lines she had said to Bubbles. She was starting to become more and more accustomed to her script, finding it more and more natural as she annunciated each word within passing days.
"Well, I mean I could make overthinking into an Olympic sport." Lieutenant Crosby joked just as Maude appeared at Bubbles bedside. She smiled at the two men, acknowledging them as she refilled Payne's water cup without interrupting their conversation.
"I've been puking so much today, I'm starting to catch up to you. Ask Maude." He nodded to the nurse next to them.
"Evening Maude." Crosby greeted the nurse. "Hope Bubbles here ain't giving you too much flak.”
"No more than you have." She just about pulled the man's chain with that one, making Bubbles erupt in laughter.
"Hey, 'snot my fault, Nurse." Crosby held a hand to his chest as if she had wounded him with his words, but the knowing smirk on his face proved otherwise.
"Did you try the tea?" She asked Croz, handing the cup of water over to Bubbles. His color was starting to come back. He looked better than this morning but he still needed to stay hydrated if he was gonna get back in the skies anytime soon.
"Nah. Next time when I actually know I'm flying I will," he sent a look over to Bubbles, only pushing his friend's buttons for fun. "Thanks Bubbles."
"Anytime." He said laughing against the rim of his cup. He took one last sip before Maude placed it back on the side table for him.
It seemed like Croz wasn't gonna let that one slide so easily. "You know I washed my hair twice, I still can't get the smell out." He leaned over his friend, practically shoving his hair in the fellow Lieutenant's face."You wanna smell? Yeah, jump in."
"No. No!" Bubbles tensed up then.
"Yeah, Come on." Croz pushed on.
Maude couldn't help but laugh at the playful side of these men. Men who still managed to let their inner kid shine through all the horror and terror they had ensued in the skies.
"Get – get away. I will puke on you! Yuh gonna have to wash it out." Bubbles threatened, trying to push Croz away.
And then like a burst of unexpected flax, everything shifted.
For not only Croz who immediately stiffened back in his seat – putting on a serious and professional front, but for Maude who – for lack of her own sense of understanding – found herself freezing just the same, but for a whole other reason.
"There he is," a deep, firm, yet some-what carefree voice broke the ice within her. And there he was, one Major Egan looking and sounding like one of those Hollywood starlets in Q's paper clipping — just stepping out of a film in the cinema. And if he hadn't had a small cut just under his right eye, he could have passed as a man who hadn't just returned from an intense mission across the skies. Clean cut, pressed in his uniform, curls styled and gelled back to perfection, with his flight jacket wrapped around his arms. Arms that held a strong hand planted against the edge of the foot of Bubbles bed. "How you doing Bubbles?" He asked.
Maude hadn't realized she was staring at the six foot two bulk of a man in front of her until Bubbles spoke up. "Never better, sir."
"That's good." And then his eyes landed on her, so intense, she suddenly wondered if he had become even taller than he was a minute ago. Feeling caught, she looked away and busied herself with the water cup on Bubbles nightstand to give herself something to do. Would the Major report back to Doctor Stover that she was incompetent and unfit to take care of his men? Lucky for Maude, his gaze broke away from hers the moment she turned around. "And I was looking for you," He said to Croz.
The chair beneath Croz creaked in protest as he stood up to be at the Major's level. "I'm sorry, Major."
"What for?" Major Egan inquired loosely.
"I – I didn't give PRs the whole flight back, I messed up the rendezvous – "
"I know. I know. The radio silence really threw off those Jerries. It's that and hitting the deck." Egan affirmed. With the conversation becoming more detailed, Maude felt out of place and rather rude for overhearing. Yet, the next words that came out of the Major's mouth not only took Croz and Bubbles by surprise, but Maude too. Any previous contemplations seemed to dissipate the moment Egan said, “Now, Harding, he couldn't be more impressed by you so, I'm transferring you to Blakely's crew full time," and then, " Bubbles, you get better, we'll find you a new fort. And Croz, we gotta give you an actual nickname."
"They call him Bing back home." Bubbles added into the conversation just as Maude urged him to take another sip. "More?" He asked, and she simply nodded as she turned back into her previous position– her view of all three men near her resurfacing.
"Bing Crosby? That's just lazy, unless you can sing." Major Egan put in his two cents, and his eyes gleamed when he asked, "Can you sing?"
"I–I ca –" Croz tethered.
"Like a donkey." Bubbles confirmed with zero ounces of hesitation, truly on a roll at deflating Croz's ego today without letting an ounce of illness ruin the fun.
"No, no – not a note, sir."
"Ah, I'm no good either, but I'm loud and hell if you can commit with enough enthusiasm, it really don't matter." And this was when Maude would come to learn of the singing shenanigans that came with one Major Egan. If only she knew then that those shenanigans would very well start up something alright.
The shorter Lieutenant and the taller Major clapped hands then in parting – a shake of sealed establishments and confirmations, proving that they were on the same page. "I'll see you at the Club Croz. I'm buying," the one with height told him, referring to the same exact club Lottie and Q would be dragging Bluell against her will in just a few short hours. "Goodnight Bubbles."
"Sir."He croaked between sips and finally handed the cup back to Maude for good.
"Goodnight, sir." Croz bid farewell. When the Major was out of earshot could Maude breathe, and Croz seemed to be too because he was back to bantering as he commented, "He thinks my nickname is lazy."
Another patient called her over then, stealing her away from the two men she had found herself laughing along with, yet a part of her felt grateful for the sudden diversion – especially now, after the Major's interruption. She couldn't explain it – couldn't even compartmentalize it exactly, but something had shifted inside her the moment he had stepped foot into the infirmary. An instinctive feeling of sorts — awfully hard to pinpoint. It hurt her head too much trying to think about it, so much so, she momentarily wondered if she was coming down with the same exact virus as Bubbles.
She wasn't.
But, she knew it was something, but what was it?
That — she didn't know.
Yet, something deep inside her – against her better judgment – told her that she needed to know. So as Croz passed by and bid her a farewell of his own, she knew what she had to do. And when the girls pitched going out to the Club again tonight, practically begging her in their shared quarters — Lottie using Q's obvious need for a distraction with Curt's lack of a return — did she give into their demise.
Was there really much ado about one night on the town?
Lottie and Q wouldn't think so, and Major Egan – well he wouldn't think so either.
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the way in which she is already whipped without "knowing" is so real.
+ Q — curt and susie got me giggling & kicking my feeties !!!
also, for important context purposes, the gifs in the beginning is how i imagine bucky diverting his gaze from eyeing miss. maude ;) sir, we all know you were LOOKING — respectfully!
p.s.: i love bubbles & croz so bad, ugh my HEART <3
ANYWAYS.....
more to come sooner than you think. lemme know what ya think so far? feedback is much appreciated as this is BRAND NEW. this is also my very FIRST historical-esce fic so my apologies if there is any inaccuracies, but it do be my own fiction twist anyways haha.
love ya'll a mil, smoochies!
— xanadu
tag list:
@rubberpsyche
@precious-little-scoundrel
@major-mads
@luminouslywriting
@justheretoreadthxxs
@karmasloverrr
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iamwhoami · 1 year
Text
It Will Get Better (Grey's Anatomy)
Grey's Anatomy
It wasn't that bad. That's what you told yourself each time. But as the excuses start piling up, Amelia Shepherd can't deny what's in front of her any longer and tries to convince you that it was bad enough to finally do something.
Warnings: Domestic Violence/Abuse
Requested = Yes
Y/L/N = Your Last Name
WOW it has been a hot second. A very hot second. A burning second. Maybe I'm back? I'm so sorry to all the other requests that I just haven't gotten to but I'm going to try to make an effort to write more again.
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Sometimes you felt stupid.
Here you were, a well accomplished and respected surgeon with a soaring career, yet you just couldn't seem to leave.
Sometimes, you would stop and wonder why you couldn't.
Because you loved him.
Because he loved you.
Sometimes you would convince yourself that you would leave. That when night came and he fell asleep, you'd pack a bag and walk out the door. Of course, that never happened, because each time, you'd convince yourself that it was your fault.
You upset him. You shouldn't have picked a fight with him. You deserved what he did to you.
That he was a good man. That he was going to change.
That he loved you.
After an especially rough night, you woke up groaning. Your body was on fire, resisting every move you made. Aching, you managed to get yourself to the bathroom and in the mirror, you examined the damage.
"Shit..." You cursed softly as your fingers traced the blaring purple splotch along your cheek.
This was going to be difficult to cover.
Sighing, you rinsed your face off with cold water and wiped it dry before pulling out your makeup bag. The bruise was already vibrant and you knew that make up wouldn't make it completely disappear. But you were hoping that between the light and the angle, you could make it work.
It was a routine you were all too familiar with.
~~~
"Y/L/N!"
You turned around, looking up from your patient's chart to see a grinning Amelia Shepherd walking towards you.
"Just the person I was looking for," Amelia grinned, her smile infectious.
Amelia Shepherd was the first person you met when you first started working at Grey Sloan after transferring from your previous hospital. She quickly became the first friend that you made too. Realistically, you trusted Amelia with your life.
"I feel like I haven't seen you around much," Amelia commented. "We should do something on a day off, I need some Y/N time."
You chuckled and agreed despite knowing that you would never spend time with your colleagues outside of work because he would never let you.
"What can I do for you?" You asked and began walking towards the nurse's station. Your body still protested every movement though and you couldn't help but let out a soft groan.
Amelia eyed you carefully but let it slide, "I just need a consult."
You nodded and she pulled up the scans, eyes still trained on your expression for any kind of sign of discomfort.
As you carefully examined the scans on Amelia's tablet, you could feel her gaze trained on your face and you felt yourself staring harder at the tablet than necessary.
However, just when you thought you could get away with it, Amelia spoke up before you could open your mouth.
"What happened there?" Amelia softly asked, her hand reaching to your cheek.
You instinctively flinched and Amelia's hand paused before she lowered it.
"Y/N?"
You blushed, "Don't worry about it Amelia, I'm just clumsy and slipped. I hit my face against the table."
Amelia, of course, was not convinced but she sensed the anxiety in your body and let it slide.
"You would let me know if something was wrong right?" Amelia quietly asked and you nodded before forcing a smile on your face.
"Of course I would."
You felt sick lying to Amelia through your smiling teeth but there was a heavy weight in your stomach that made you do it.
He loved you.
~~~
You made a conscious effort to avoid Amelia after that close call. It hurt your heart to do so but you couldn't risk it. You took longer routes to get to places in the hospital when you could. You avoided break rooms that she was in.
Amelia knew you were avoiding her too. She let you have your space for a while but when it became clear that you weren't going to let up any time soon, she began to try to reach out to you.
It was one missed call. Then two. Then you stopped answering texts. You contemplated blocking her altogether but couldn't bring yourself to do it.
One evening after a long shift, you let yourself melt into the comfort of your couch, your partner watching the Seahawks game next to you.
Your phone sounded and you glanced at your screen to see a text message from Amelia. Sighing, you closed your phone and turned it face down on the coffee table.
But it didn't stop.
A series of text messages resulted in a series of dings but as you were reaching out to grab your phone to silence it, your partner's arm pushed past you and ripped your phone off the coffee table.
"What the fuck is so important that it's interrupting the game," He grumbled and looked at the screen. "Amelia?"
"My coworker," You quickly responded. "She's probably just asking about a patient."
He eyed you and you thought you were going to get away with it until his glare hardened.
"Prove it."
You gulped knowing that Amelia's text messages weren't about a patient. Your heart raced as you stumbled for an excuse but your hesitation was more than enough for him to lash out at you.
You weren't sure how long it would have lasted had your pager not gone off. Maybe the whole night for all you knew. Mumbling that you needed to be more transparent with him, he backed off, leaving you to pick yourself up off the floor.
Your body screamed in protest as you gathered yourself as quickly as possible before rushing off to the hospital. A massive trauma had come in and they needed all hands on deck. On your way out, you managed to pop two Advils into your mouth before grabbing your bag.
As you drove to the hospital, your mind raced with excuses to explain the growing bruises on your skin. You knew that in the moment, the hospital would be too busy to question the blotches but the aftermath would be an interrogation.
~~~
Exhausted and burning, you had finally made it through all the surgeries and now all the patients were in recovery. As you closed your eyes, you let yourself relax into the couch in the break room, a steaming cup of tea in your hands.
You felt someone sit down next to you and you didn't need to open your eyes to confirm it was Amelia.
"Let me guess, you fell again?" Amelia spoke softly and you knew it wasn't actually a question.
She knew.
You couldn't bring yourself to say anything. To lie and deny what she knew. To tell the truth and confirm what she knew. You felt your throat tingle as a lump formed and a tear silently escaped your closed eyes.
"You don't need to keep doing this," Amelia said and gently placed her hand on your arm.
You still didn't respond and Amelia took the cup out of your hands before placing it on the table with a soft clink.
"Y/N, look at me," She said but your eyes remained closed.
"Y/N."
Reluctantly, you opened your eyes even though one was beginning to swell shut.
"You deserve better," Amelia spoke with conviction, her gaze focused on your eyes. "It's not your fault, it was never your fault."
You swallowed and shook your head softly, "I can't."
"Yes you can," Amelia said. "You can. I will be here the entire time but you just have to trust me. It will get better if you just trust me on this one."
"He loves me." You replied but your voice quivered.
Amelia's heart broke at your words, "Y/N, this isn't love. Love doesn't hurt like this."
The singular tear that had slipped through your eyes seemed to have been an invitation for the others to follow as your body began to shake with each sob.
Slowly, Amelia wrapped an arm around your shoulders and pulled you close to her side before stroking your hair.
"I promise Y/N, it will get better," She whispered. "You deserve so much better."
You closed your eyes again and took a deep breath as the tears kept dripping down your cheeks.
"Okay," You mumbled back. "I trust you."
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rebelliousstories · 4 months
Text
Sins of the Father
Relationship: Luke Alvez x Reader
Fandom: Criminal Minds
Request: No
Warnings: Angst, Violence, Fluff
Word Count: 4,992
Main Masterlist: Here
Criminal Minds Masterlist: Here
Summary: When the victim of a crime shows up to a hospital, she only has one name on her lips as she dazes in and out; Luke.
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John F. Kennedy said, “Children are the world’s most valuable resource and its best hope for the future.”
Racing inside of a hospital in the blistering cold, there were medics and emergency room staff working desperately on a woman in a stretcher. A small boy who was crying out for his mom from the back of the ambulance. An oxygen mask covered her mouth but she kept trying to speak.
“Get the OR prepped now!” A nurse yelled, running alongside the gurney.
“Luke. Luke!” The woman pulled her mask off and fought with her nurse that was trying to put it back on. People moved out of their way as they ran down the hallways. As they were doing that, a small boy was being led by an EMT to the waiting area to wait with him. A woman in a suit, and a man in a polo showed up to the nurses station and showed their credentials before being pointed over at the waiting room.
“Buddy, I know that you’re scared, but I’m gonna wait right here till the police can show up and help you. Do you want a water?” The EMT tried to get the boy to open up, but he just curled in on himself.
“Excuse me,” the woman gained the attention of the older man, “we’re agents Prentiss and Alvez. May we speak with you for a moment?”
The man went to nod, but his eyes drifted back to the small child next to him. Luke stepped forward and crouched down in front of the small boy. The boy hesitantly looked towards the older man, and looked at him with recognition that the agent did not understand.
“Hey there. I’m Luke. Do you mind if I wait here with you?” He asked softly, waiting for the boy to acknowledge him. But the boy said nothing. The medic was ushered away by Emily, but Luke still sat on the floor in front of the boy to not crowd him in.
“You’re the one who treated the woman that was just admitted?” Emily asked, already going into business mode.
“Yeah. She was in rough shape when we found her and her son. I’ve seen so many things in my years, but if I never saw one of these guys victims again it would be too soon.” He shook his head as he dropped his eyes.
“Can you tell us where you found her? We know there was a 9-1-1 call that led you to an abandoned factory. Was there anything unusual about it?” She pressed. Her feyes flickered over to where her friend was still sitting near the boy.
“Um, she was bound with tape and rope. Her kid was holed up in a closet down the hall.” The man responded.
“This is very important, did you remove anything from her hands? Stamps, coins, even bugs that have been preserved?” Prentiss got her phone ready to make a call with whatever the EMT said.
“Cards. We gave the police a queen of hearts, jack of diamonds, and a uh… oh what was it,” he was thinking hard about what the other card was. “Oh, a king of clubs as well.”
“Thank you. You’ve been a big help.” She let the medic go and turned to where Luke was still trying to get through to the woman’s son.
“Ready and willing for you, my fair lady.” The cheery voice of one Miss Penelope Garcia chimed through the phone.
“Hey girl. Listen, the collector left a set of cards this time. I’m gonna have the Virginia P.D. send them over. But he only left three this time. He didn’t complete the set.” The older agent continued to stare in confusion at the duo in front of her while the clacking of keys filled the other line.
“Why wouldn’t he have completed the set? That’s like his whole thing.” Penelope was also staring confused now.
“I don’t know, but we do know that the three previous victims all had something that they hid and never claimed. Look into our Jane Doe and see if anyone matching her description has gone missing that has a child.” Emily instructed, noticing the smile passing over Luke’s face as the child looked at him again. He still had not said a word but he was responding.
“Oh she has a child? That is awful. Why do bad guys do bad things? Okay, I will see if anyone has gone missing in a tri-state region matching her description that has a child. Farewell fair g-woman!” And the line clicked off. Prentiss smiled but kept her distance from the to men in front of her and just watched them.
“Can you tell me your name bud? If I know your name, I could find out how to better help your mom.” Luke gently pried, finally moving to the chair next to the boy.
“Liam. My mom has a picture of you.” The boy admitted, turning his body fully to the man to his left.
“Okay Liam, what do you mean your mom has a picture of me? Like from the T.V. or computer?” He pried again, confusion forming deep in his face.
“No. In her necklace and in the frame in her drawer. She thinks that I don’t know, but I do.” Liam looked down at his feet as he kicked lightly.
“You’re very smart Liam. Do you know where she got those pictures?” Now, Luke was going away from the main objective.
“She’s had them forever,” he shrugged, “she doesn’t like talking about it with me. Mom just cries late at night. I think that’s why the man gave me this.”
“Gave you what, Liam?” He did not know how that little brain was able to comprehend and process everything that was happening; Luke’s brain was having a difficult time by himself.
“This.” Liam pulled down his shirt and showed something stapled to the inside. Luke helped him flip the edge over to reveal a card. Whipping a glove out of his pocket, Luke was grabbing the card, careful not to cause harm to the child. The name “Luke” stared back at him, which just added more confusion to his mind. The agent looked back to Emily who was calling to get an evidence kit to collect the card. Once the card was collected and sent off to the BAU, Luke continued to sit with Liam as he did not want to leave the boys side.
At the headquarters, Reid stared at the three cards that he currently had and thanked the agent that delivered him the fourth. There was a reason the unsub did not pair all for cards together like he should have. He was known as The Collector; he should have put them all together out of compulsion.
He placed all four cards on a board and just stared at them. This unsub paired the stamps together with years consecutively apart. Coins were in the same pattern, just with earlier years. And the bugs were the oldest but the dates on the back of the frames were earlier, but all together.
“Garcia got a name on our Jane Doe- what are you doing?” JJ asked, walking in to the round table room where Reid was staring at the pictures of items that were found at the scenes of the crime. He did not give her an answer but instead turned to his friend instead.
“I know why he’s choosing what he’s choosing to display. Who’s the latest?” Spencer jumped from thought to thought with surprising speed. Jennifer told him her name, and placed her photo where it needed to go on the board.
“Great. We need to get the team together.” He left to go track down his fellow teammates while JJ just stood there, trying to see what he saw in the pictures. In just a moment, JJ and Spencer stood with Rossi, Lewis, Simmons and Garcia while Alvez and Prentiss were on a conference call.
“I didn’t see it until the card came in, but please indulge me for a moment.” Spencer began, gaining the attention of those around him.
“So, when we’re young, what’s something that we can easily get to collect? Especially young boys?”
“Bugs.” Lewis offered.
“Exactly,” his hands were running wild as he spoke, “then when we’re old enough to make or get money, you usually collect by date. When you’re old enough to write, you might send letters and if you have the collecting tendency, you collect stamps. Finally, when you’re old enough to start playing cards, you might collect cards based off their patterns and designs.” After his explanation, Spencer was looking around and just hoping he had not lost them.
“So he’s telling the story of his life through the collectibles he leaves.” Rossi pointed out, feeling like there was more to be discovered.
“Exactly, but this is where it get’s interesting.” Reid pulled down the cards and laid them on the desk.
“On the front, all four of these cards look similar, however,” the cards were flipped, “on the back, only the two hearts match. The two kings don’t match each other or the hearts. They have completely different appearances.”
The team stood around as they thought about the explanation. It was not until a nurse came by that Luke’s attention was drawn away. He let Emily know that he was going to her, and left the team.
“She’s resting right now. There was some extensive damage but she should make a full recovery. You can go see her now.” The nurse led the way down the hall to where the woman lay in her hospital bed. Alvez thanked the nurse, and she went on her way. He looked in through the glass at the beaten woman inside and felt his throat close. Her voice still ran through his head everyday, even after all this time.
Luke walked inside the room, and let out a shaky breath at he watched her just lying there. She was staring off into nothingness and barely registered that there was another person in the room. With a clearing of his through, the agent brought her attention to him.
“Luke.” She whimpered, tears welling up at the mere sight of him.
“Hey reina.” He whispered, coming over to the side of the bed. She said nothing for a minute, before she finally burst out crying. The pain in her face flared up, yet she could not help but cry.
“I’m sorry, Luke. I’m so sorry.” Her words caused the man to hold her hand delicately as she continued to cry.
“You have nothing to be sorry about, sweetie. You did nothing to deserve this treatment.” Alvez tried to reassure her but she just kept shaking her head and crying.
“It is all my fault. I did this. This is my fault, Luke. I set him off.” Her breathing was starting to pick up and Luke knew he needed to act fast. He had enough of his friends from the army that developed panic attacks after what they saw to know when one was starting.
“You gotta calm down, reina. Breathe, you gotta breathe. Follow me. In and out. There you go. Try it again. Good job. Let’s try it again.” Luke led her through several exercises to help stave off the attack, and was glad to see her heart beat finally calming back down. Once she was able to catch her breath, the woman looked around, and was about to be sent into another tizzy.
“My son. Where’s my son? Where’s Liam?” Even though she tried to get up, the agent did not let her.
“Hey, hey, hey. It’s okay. Lay back down. Liam is with my coworker, Emily. They’re just outside in the waiting room.” He reassured her once more. She nodded as she settled back into her bed with Luke at her side.
“So, where are you working now,” came her ask. Her voice was small and weak than he had ever known.
“The Behavioral Analysis Unit at Quantico.” He answered, sitting down in the chair beside her bed.
“BAU, huh? Would have never thought you would go from the FTF to a desk job.” She teased, causing them both to chuckle.
“Hey, don’t wanna hear nothing. Little miss work from home author.” Alvez sent right back, making them chuckle again. But once they died down, the man turned solemn. “I’ve gotta ask some tough questions that I’d much rather not have Liam present for, if that’s okay?”
She nodded and let her self get comfortable in her bed first. Luke readjusted in his seat as well before he began.
“Do you know the man who did this to you?” He asked, watching the woman closely for any sign of discomfort.
“Yeah. My ex-boyfriend, Santiago.” Her eyes shifted away as she answered.
“Wait, Santi did this? I thought he was still in New York.” Luke could not catch a break on the confusion.
“He followed me here. When I broke up with you, Luke, I didn’t want to. But he said he would kill you and my parents if I didn’t. I couldn’t take that chance. He knows where all of you live.” She pleaded, looking back with tears in her eyes.
“It’s fine. You were only doing what you thought was right. Even though, I would have had someone investigate his threats for you. But sweetheart, that was five years ago. What have you been doing all this time? And why would he do this now?” Luke pressed, holding her hand in his own.
“I was taking care of my son. But I was tired of being controlled. I found out that your number hadn’t changed. I guess he found out cause one minute I’m packing Liam’s bag, and the next I’m tied down to a table in an abandoned building.” Her words tumbled out of her mouth uncontrollably.
“When we found Liam in the waiting room, he had a card stapled to his shirt. Now, that’s just his signature, right. Leaving something on his victims that is a collectible. But the cards weren’t collectible. They were all different except for the queen and jack. Two different kings that did not match. Does that have anything to do with Liam?” Luke noticed how she chewed her lip between her teeth and picked at her nails unconsciously. That was always her tell that she was hiding something. Now just what that something was the question. He called her name, and she looked him in the eyes. The woman was wishing that she had not done that.
“Who is Liam’s father?”
A knock at the window caused the pair to pull away and look to the source of the noise. Emily had arrived with Liam, who ran to his mother. Luke helped the young boy up, and followed the agent out of the room to discuss.
“This woman had the most rage shown to her, but not the son. Whoever this guy is, he is getting closer to his end game. But I can’t help feeling like we’re missing something.” Prentiss lamented, noticing how distant Luke was after her little speech.
“What is it?” She pried.
“I know who this guy is. We need protection detail stationed at her door until we catch him. He’ll come back and finish off the job.”
The two agents raced back to Quantico while on the phone with the team to fill them in. Inside the SUV, the air was so thick with tension you could cut it with a knife. Prentiss was not sure what was going on with Luke since they left the hospital, but he was silently staring out of the window. The man was lost in his thoughts as he thought about everything that had happened in the last decade.
When they made their way up the elevator to the sixth floor, Luke was silent through all of that. His next words would not come until he had barged his way into Garcia’s lair. The technical analyst let out a shriek as she was startled by the loud noise.
“Oh hello to you too. What can I do for you mister with the very scary look on his face that tells me something bad is about to happen?” Her voice trailed off as Alvez came to rest his hand on the bak of her chair and look over her shoulder to gaze at the screen.
“Garcia, pull up anything and everything you can on a Santiago Domingo from the Bronx. We went to the same high school. Send it over to the main screen.” Luke left as soon and as fast as he had entered which left the woman to scramble to get his information. Making his way into the round table room, Emily met him in there with determination.
“I got your text. What’s going on that you don’t want to fill the team in about yet? Is this about the latest victim in the hospital?” She wasted no time, and got right down to business.
“Yes,” he admitted with a deep sigh. “I wanted to tell you first before bringing the team up to speed.”
“Floor is yours.” She prompted.
Down in the bull pen, the rest of the agents watched through the blinds as the unit chief spoke with her agent. They were all trying to figure out who this guy was, but was not able to. However, no one missed the DMV photo that was pulled up on the big screen.
“What do you think they’re talking about in there?” Lewis pondered, sipping her coffee. She had lost track as to what number cup she was on for the day.
“Whatever it is, it doesn’t look good.” JJ replied, popping a chip in her mouth as she was finally able to take a break to eat. A noise prompted the rest of the team to turn their heads to the resident genius who was still focusing on the cards that were collected from the scene.
“Your IQ is whining so much I want to give it some cheese. What do you have, Reid?” Rossi teased, prompting a few chuckles.
“The cards. The other mismatched king, the king of spades, that’s the one that had Luke’s name on it but why?” Spencer held a confused look on his face as he tried to piece the puzzle together.
“Maybe the unsub knows Luke and wanted to taunt him. Wouldn’t be the first time that’s happened.” Simmons pointed out, but Reid only shook his head.
“It’s got to be more than that. The queen and jack are from the same suit, and the same deck. But only the kings are different in suit and deck, and they don’t match any other card that was recovered.” He continued his explanation.
“What’s your point?” Rossi asked.
“I’m not sure.” Reid concluded.
“Guys,” Emily stepped out and called their attention, “you’re gonna want to get in here.”
The team shuffled into the room, and all stood around the table while Luke was right in front of the screen. His face was solemn and defeated; a look that did not suit Luke Alvez very well.
“The man we’re looking for was my best friend in high school, Santiago Domingo. We called him Santi. He was a bit of an odd guy, but harmless for the most part. Came from a broken home and was a typical kleptomaniac. Anything he could get his hands on, he took.” Luke took a break and casted his eyes to the table. Having to dig up old memories was hard for him.
“Halfway through senior year there was a girl who transferred to our school. She had all the same classes as me so I got assigned one morning to help her around. I really liked this girl, I mean she was the total package. Smart, pretty, great sense of humor, wanted to help people, already had a job and another more permanent one set up after high school. Well, as time went on and she would hang around me and Santi, I ended up falling for her. I didn’t realize that Santi was in the same boat I was in.’
‘Prom came around and as much as I wanted to ask this girl out, Santi was asking me for advice on how to do it himself. So I helped him. He was the happiest I had ever seen him when she said yes. They made a really lovely couple. After high school, they stayed together. And I saw less and less of her, and anytime I did see her, she was always within arm length of Santi. Then the bruises came.”
Pictures flashed on the screen, and the whole team had to hold their breath. The woman’s face was covered with scrapes and marks. Her arms, chest, legs, hands, and feet were all in the same horrid condition. Garcia averted her eyes as they continued, but everyone else kept watching the slides.
“She reached out to me about twelve years ago, wanting to get out of the relationship but felt like she couldn’t. I got her to go to the police, testify against him in court, and got Santi put away for ten years. Two years later, we started dating once she felt like she could and we were happy. I planned on proposing to her, but before I could, she broke up with me. Left all of her stuff in our apartment, and was gone in the middle of the night. According to prison records, Santi only served four of his ten. Got out on good behavior. According to her, she had to break things off with me, otherwise he would have killed her parents, then me.” Luke concluded. The room was so silent, you could hear everyone’s breathing. No one said anything for a while. They just stood there and stayed silent.
“So how can we help find Santiago?” Emily asked, which pulled everyone else from their stupors.
“Garcia, where was he staying in town? If he’s doing all these murders, he’s got to be staying somewhere isolated that he can plan and execute everything.” Matt directed.
“Right, um. So Domingo’s last known address was…” her face dropped once the search result came back, “an apartment downtown. He’s been living on the same floor as Luke for the past six years.”
“No matter how stupid this guy may be, he’s not stupid enough to keep her, with a child on the same floor as Luke. He’s got to have another spot that he was holding them.” JJ countered, but it all slipped away for Alvez. Six years Santiago had known where he was and knew the routine.
“Look for anything registered in her name. That’s going to be where they’ve been living since leaving Luke.” As soon as Spencer said the magic words, Garcia had her fingers racing across her keys. Another ding.
“Okay so I’ve got an address, also downtown, but about five miles from the apartment. It’s a house registered in her name. They’ve been there for five years.” Penelope looked up at Luke, but he was just staring that table into the ground. If looks could kill, that table would be taking a world of abuse.
“So we go to his house. He was interrupted with her. He’ll wanna regroup before going with his next strike.” Luke made the move to leave the room to get ready but was stopped by a hand on his shoulder.
“Look, Luke. You are far too close to this case. Let us handle it. We need him alive, and with your relationship to the victim, you’ll be a liability.” Rossi gently spoke, as if hushing a cornered animal. The agent turned around and leveled his unit chief with a look. A look that said, “you signing off on this right now?”
“Go stay at the hospital with her until we catch Santiago. You’ll be better suited for that than this.” Emily did not miss the look of indignation that came across Alvez’ face. Even less so when it was paired with the stomping of boots as he stormed away.
Luke obeyed the order though. He drove silently to the hospital, wishing that he was out in the field taking down this guy. Once he was parked and the vehicle was shut off, he hit the steering wheel a couple times to let out his anger at the situation. Scrubbing his hands over his face, Alvez left the vehicle and made his way into the hospital. His team was out there taking down his childhood best friend without him. If anyone should be able to make that arrest, it should be Luke.
He kept thinking about this all the way to her room. And then his mind drifted to her son, Liam. The kid was just five years old and had almost lost his mom thanks to that man. Arriving at her room, Alvez noticed that the blinds were drawn and immediately had a bad feeling in his gut. Placing a hand on his firearm, he went into the room as quietly as possible.
“Thought I wouldn’t notice yo slipping right back into Mr. Perfect’s arms, huh?” It was Santiago. He had found her. Luke should not have been too shocked; Santiago needed to complete the collection.
“Please, don’t hurt us more than you have. Okay? Liam loves you. Don’t do this in front of him.” She was trying to shield her son, but with her condition and being in a hospital bed, that was very difficult.
“Don’t lie to me. I know he isn’t mine.” Santiago growled, waving around a knife.
“Santiago, put it down.” The man in question turned around, but his face relaxed to be almost jovial upon seeing the agent in the room.
“Well, look who we have here. Luke Alvez. Big bad FBI agent who doesn’t give a rat’s ass about where he comes from.” Domingo moved closer to the mother and son in the bed while moving his knife closer and closer. This prompted Luke to draw his gun, and kept it trained on the man in front of him.
“Santi, I don’t want to hurt you but I will. Let them go and drop the knife.” He pleaded, shifting his eyes to her in reassurance.
“Has she even told you,” came the question. When no response was given from anyone, Santiago burst out laughing in his spot. “Oh, she hasn’t. This is too perfect. You’re so clueless man.”
“Santi, please.” She begged, but cowered when the knife came closer to her and her son.
“No! Don’t you think he has the right to know? I mean, you wouldn’t be so heartless as to keep that from him would you?” He was teasing her, and still waving a knife around her son.
“Go on, tell him. You’ll feel better.” Santiago kept repeating the prompt over and over again, but she refused. Instead, she held her son close and waited for the nightmare to be over.
“Tell him!” He shouted, yanking Liam from his mom’s grasp. Both people cried out and tried to get to the other, but Santiago had other plans. With a knife held menacingly over the boys stomach, he prompted the woman again. This time much gentler. “Tell Luke.”
She looked at her son, who had tears coming down his face. He looked just as confused as the agent that she laid her eyes on next. Her vision was obscured by the tears that were pouring down her face as she tried to figure a way to get her son back.
“Luke, when I left to go to Santi, I was pregnant. I told him for years that Liam was his, but when he started growing proper hair, I couldn’t lie anymore. Liam is your son, Luke. I’m so sorry I hid that from you.” Her wails were overshadowed by Santiago’s whoops in delight.
“Doesn’t that feel so much better. How about you Luke? Feel any better knowing the truth?” Santiago teased again. The agent kept his gun and eyes hardened on the man but was quietly processing the information.
“Now where were we?” He raised his knife up as if to swing, and Luke did not think about it another second. Landing a bullet in the man’s shoulder, the agent swooped in and kicked the knife away from him as he grabbed the boy and hoisted him up. Santiago was writhing in agony on the ground, blood steadily pouring out, but Luke did not care. He set the young boy on the bed, and called it in.
In just a few minutes, his entire team was there. Luke kept himself busy for the time being with giving a statement, getting Santiago out of the room and filling his unit chief in. Thirty minutes later, he finally caught a long enough break to go back into the room where mother and son rested. Even though they were lying down, neither was too terribly tired. When she heard the door click, she waved the man over to sit on the chair beside them. Keeping a hand on the boy, she reached her other hand out to hold Luke’s.
“Was that true? What you said earlier.” He asked, begging for confirmation.
“Every word. He’s yours, Luke. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier, but he wouldn’t let me reach out to you once we knew for certain.” Liam sat up and faced the adults talking.
“Hey buddy. I’m your dad.” Luke choked out as tears came to his eyes. Without another word, Liam launched himself into his awaiting arms as Alvez cried. Bringing her into the fold, they all sat there crying and finally being together as a family.
“Each day of our lives we make deposits in the memory banks of our children.” Charles R. Swindoll
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nyasiaaaaa · 8 months
Text
In the Bleak Mid-Winter
Pairing: Thomas Shelby x Fem reader (Nurse)  Fem reader x Arthur ( platonic) Fem reader x John( platonic )
Summary: This is a story about two people who become constants in each others lives, and eventually fall for each. While one learns to love again, the other learns the cost of loving a man like him. 
Word count: 3.5k
Warnings: Cursing, blood, death, , drinking, alcohol, talks of war, guns, murder, Tommy Shelby, ( If I missed anything or you think something should be added please tell me.) ( Also Y/N is on dick, IDKY she acts like this)
A/N: part 1 takes place during season two, part 2/3 season 3 and 4/5/6 season 4. This is a Slow burn there will be smut eventually. 
Part 1  Part 2    Part 4   Part 5  part 6
*****************************
It was early, though you didn't know how early; sunlight filled the room slowly, and you heard birds chirping in the distance. You were still on the floor, but your position had changed slightly. Tommy was now lying to your right on his side with his head in your lap, and your legs were stretched out in front of you with one hand on your lap and the other playing with his hair. Neither of you had to gone to sleep; even though Tommy's eyes were closed, you knew he wasn't asleep. 
You didn't know how long you had been laying there, and honestly, your body was aching, but you were going to stay till he was ready to get up. 
It wasn't long after the sun completely filled the room that Tommy got up without a word or a glance in your direction. He walked to the bathroom that was in the room and shut the door, locking it. 
You stood up and stretched, then you stood there debating whether to wait for him or leave. He needs space, right?  
Yeah— he needed space; you decided to leave and go check on Gracie's body to make sure she was ready to be transported. You headed towards the nurses' station, hoping to get an update. 
As you approached the station, you were glad to see a nurse you knew and liked.
"Hey Jackie," your voice fell flat as you slightly smiled. 
"Hi, you OK. " 
"Yeah, just tired. Uh, did Grace's body get taken care of? Is it all stitched up and down in the morgue?" 
"Yeah, and one of the other doctors had to stitch her up. Dr. Brown's hands weren't the steadiest between the Whiskey and Grace dying on his watch. And now the board wants to do an investigation," she said and smacked her teeth. 
"I had told them— I told the board that Dr. Brown was a drunk and that It was only a matter of time before someone got killed." You had pushed the papers on the counter in frustration before resting your arms on it and placing your head in your hands. "Maybe— I don't know." 
You had been too caught up in your emotions to notice that your friend had gone silent. You didn't notice till someone cleared their throat behind you; slowly, you raised your head to see your friend frozen in fear. 
You turned around and saw Tommy standing behind you; he cleared his throat again before licking his lip and then running his cigarette across them. He placed it in his mouth, lit it, and took a long drag, all while his eyes remained on the floor. 
Pulling the cig from his lip, he lifted his head to look at you. 
His eyes looked different; they were darker, and they looked.... empty.
"I'll send someone for Grace," he said before turning and leaving the hospital. 
You watched him as he walked away from you. You wanted to say something, but what could you say? 
You just watched him walk away till he was out of your sight. 
You were sick, you knew about Dr.Brown, and you never said anything, and now Tommy Kn-
Wait
Tommy had just heard you admit that you knew Dr.Brown was a drunk, and you never told him, and now Grace was dead because of him. 
Because of you. 
You fell back, but Jackie caught you; people around you asked questions, but you couldn't hear them, let alone see them, as your vision started to get blurry and your chest tightened.
Tommy was going to kill you, no doubt about it. 
*******************************
You had yet to die; you were so sure that by nightfall, you would be in a shallow grave right next to Dr.Brown. But surprisingly, you and Dr.Brown were still alive, and it had been one week since Grace's death. 
For the first couple of days after Grace's death, you had been slightly paranoid, constantly checking your surroundings on the lookout for Tommy or any peaky man. But after a week of not seeing anyone, you started to calm down.
Everything had been quiet and slow. It didn't feel right, like the calm before the storm. 
You had been sitting at the nurse's station doing paperwork when a fellow nurse came up to you and told you that you had been requested to exam room one. 
You were petrified.
You got up slowly from your chair. Your legs had a slight shake to them as you walked. Had he done this on purpose? Did he wait you out just to kill you when you least expected it? Your breath started to come out shaky, and you started feeling light-headed. You looked at the wall, counting down the exam rooms as you walked. It was like the universe was laughing at you, giving you your very own count down to your death, 5….4….3….2…1.
You stood in front of exam room one. 
It was time. 
You couldn't move, your arms felt glued to your side, you couldn't move them, you couldn't open the curtain.  
You closed your eyes and took a deep breath.
On three, you would go in.
One 
Two 
Three 
You didn't move, not an inch. 
You felt like screaming; you brought your hands up to your mouth to keep you from making a sound.  
Your face suddenly felt cold and wet; you reached up to touch your cheek; it was tears you were crying. 
You couldn't do this. Maybe you could run away; you did have an Aunt in America somewhere, you think. You could-
The curtain was pulled back, and in front of you stood John and Arthur. 
You started to back up, and your tears flowed more freely. 
"No, no, no, Please," you sob out. 
Arthur said your name as he reached for you, but you flinched away and continued to back up until you hit a wall.
You were trapped; there was nowhere you could run, so you just slid down the wall and curled into yourself.
"Calm down, will you? I don't know what you think is going on, but we need your help," John said 
You raised your head out of your knees and looked up to John before looking over at Arthur. 
"It's true here; take my hand," he said, reaching his hand out to you; you hesitated but eventually took it. He helped you up to your feet, guided you into the exam room, and closed the curtains behind y'all.
"What do you need?" your voice was strained, and you kept sniffing.
 Arthur took out his handkerchief, handing it to you; you took it and wiped your face.
The two shared a look before Arthur spoke up, "Tommy wants the doctor dead, the one who worked on Grace." 
You were confused. If they weren't here to kill you, then what did they want, and why are they telling you this.
"OK, what does that have to do with me?" 
"The Doctor isn't taking any visitors or new patients. He's keeping himself locked up, and we're having difficulty getting to him. We need your help. Tommy said you would know how to help." John was blunt, and while Arthur stood, there was a look on his face that you could quite read. You had heard that the Doctor locked himself up in his office days ago, so it made sense that they couldn't reach him. 
You had assumed Tommy was talking about taking the Doctor down the hall you snuck him out of. It made sense; they could snatch him as soon as he walked out the door, he wouldn't suspect a thing, and there would be no witness. It's not like anyone would snitch anyway. 
You didn't take a second to think about it cause there was nothing to think about. You had no choice but to help them, so you said, "OK, follow me." 
You lead them to the hallway and out the door; you tell them your plan and tell them to wait there for you. Once they understood, you left them and headed towards Dr. Brown's office. 
You walked fast. There was no reason to drag this out.
You arrived at his office and jiggled the handle, but it was locked, so you reached up and knocked.
"Doctor, it me open up. It's me, Dr.Brown; open up." 
 You heard footsteps approach the door, then a lock turn; he peeked out the door slightly before shutting it again. You were confused and about to knock again when you heard stuff being moved around. He must've barricaded himself inside, not taking any risk. 
You waited, and soon, he came to the door again and opened it; he pulled you inside before closing the door and locking it again.
It smelled like shit, 
you looked around; the room was a mess; the trash cans were overfilled, spilling onto the floor, papers were everywhere, and furniture was tossed around. You turned back to look at the Doctor, who was already looking at you. He looked like he had been rolling around dirty; his clothes and hair were all messed up, and his eyes were bloodshot. He looked like he hadn't slept in days. 
You felt bad for what you were about to do.
"They're here, Tommy, Arthur, John. They're all here. They're looking for you." You tried to sound panicked so he would believe you.
He started to pace around the floor and ran his finger through his hair. "What—here—no, no." He stopped and turned to look at you. "Why are you here, you with them? You here to kill me, please, please don't. I'm a good guy; you know I'm a good guy." Tears fell down his face as he got on his knees in front of you and begged. 
You felt your eyes start to water; you couldn't do this; you panicked and turned your back towards him. 
You closed your eyes and calmed yourself down. 
You turned back to face him and hoped he wouldn't read into what just happened. 
"Get up; I'm not here to kill you; I'm here to help you." 
"What"
"If I was with them, they would have come through the doors instead of me. Now Get Up!" 
He looked at you briefly, got up, grabbed some cash from his desk, and met you at the door.
"OK, we'll have to be quick; they could be anywhere. I will let you out on the south side, and after that, you're on your own." He nodded at you, tears still falling from his eyes.
You quickly opened the door before you could stop yourself. You pretended to check if the coast was clear before telling him to follow you. 
Your walk to the south end of the hospital felt so slow but fast at the same time. You were approaching the final stretch of hallway, the door was in your sight, and you picked your pace up, 
you just wanted to get this over with.
"Thank you so much. I had prayed for a way out, and in came you." 
His words caused you to let a few tears sip; you quickly wiped them and reached out to open the door.
As soon as the both of y'all were out the door and it closed, Arthur and John came around from the wall. You heard him panic but kept walking straight. He yelled your name as he begged for his life, 
that only made you walk even faster. 
You passed Arthur and John, but you didn't look them in the eye; you couldn't. 
You heard the gun cock, and that's when his begging ended, and he started saying prayers.
"By The Order Of The Peaky Blinders" 
Then the gun went off.
You jumped, frightened, and quickened your pace.
You walked to the front of the building and into the hospital. You walked up to the nurses' station and grabbed your things. Some other nurses were there, and you told them you weren't feeling well and would be out for a few days. You didn't wait to hear their response and rushed home. 
When you got home, you immediately went and showered; you felt dirty. You were in there for over an hour, and you kept soaping up and washing it off over and over again. No matter how hard you scrubbed, you still felt like there was blood on you. 
When you finally got out of the shower, your skin was sore, and you were tired. You were too tired to even put clothes on; you hopped on your bed in your towel and balled yourself up real tight. 
At the angle you were lying at, you could see yourself in the mirror; you just looked at yourself. 
It wasn't like you were looking at a completely different person; you knew it was you. It wasn't a stranger in the mirror. It was just a different version of you that you hadn't seen since the war. 
A version you didn't want coming back. 
************************************
It had been a month since you saw Tommy and a few weeks since the Dr.Brown thing. 
You had taken a week off to handle your emotions; it was your first week back, and you were doing fine. You weren't your happiest self, but you spoke when you were spoken to, ate with everyone else, and even laughed at people's jokes. 
Was any of it genuine? No, but you are all about faking it till you make it. 
You had also been trying to write a letter to Tommy. It will say how you are genuinely grateful for everything that he has done, but you can't do this anymore. You would back pay him in rent when you could, but for now, if he could stop the protection detail and send his men to get fixed up, you would greatly appreciate it. 
You were having a hard time sounding stern. You had to make sure he understood that you couldn't do this anymore; you couldn't keep a man like him in your life, 
cause it was starting to cost you.
You were chewing on your pencil as you stared down at the letter you had written. The paper was smudged, and eraser pieces were everywhere.
 You had glanced up the clock to check the time; it was late, a quarter to midnight. You were working a night shift at the hospital; it wasn't bad. It was a chill night, pretty quiet. 
You stood up about to get a snack when you heard a tire screech outside; you peeked around the corner and saw a car in the ambulance bay; it must have been pretty serious if someone had driven here instead of calling an ambulance. You started walking towards the door of the bay when they suddenly burst open; a young lady yelled as she fell back. 
"Help, please, someone help."
You rushed over to help her, and that's when you realized the woman was Ada and the man she was holding in her arms was 
Tommy. 
"Ada, what happened?" You grabbed Tommy off her and signed for her to stand up; together, you both lifted him on a gurney and rushed him to an exam room.
"I don't know, h-he said," She was struggling to speak as she cried, "he said he had a cracked skull, concussion, internal bleed, and something about hemorrhaging." 
You looked at her, confused; if he had all that, he would be dead right now; he should be dead. You placed Tommy in a room and started to look him over; he was severely injured. 
"OK, Ada, look at me." You grabbed her arm tightly to get her attention. "I needed you to run towards the hospital's front desk and tell them that I need help. OK, say my name and tell them I need a neurosurgeon to come." She looked at you, hesitant to leave Tommy 
"Please, Ada, I can only do so much." 
She nodded and took off. You put gloves on before assessing Tommy. 
He had bruised ribs and a dark purple stomach; he might have been right about the internal bleeding; you went up to check his pupil reacting, and you grabbed his head softly, turning it up toward you before flashing your light. One eye was blown, but the other was good. 
He was in serious trouble; the likelihood of him dying outweighed the possibility of him not.
You were about to walk away to grab some gauze when someone grabbed your wrist; you tuned in and saw Tommy blinking; you rushed over and stood over him.
"Tommy, hey, can you see me? Can you hear me? You are in the hospital. Everything's going to be OK." He let out grunts of noise, not making any sense.
"Shhh, it's OK. Don't speak, please; you might hurt yourself."
"G-Grace " 
You immediately got nervous; if he was seeing Grace, he didn't have much time left.
"Tommy, no, it's me, hey, it's me." You grabbed his face in your hands and made him look at you. 
He whispered your name.
"Yeah, Tommy, it's me." Tears had been falling from your face, but you didn't notice until you tasted them. 
"Yo- You h-hav-e to P-ull me out." 
"What?" You reached up to wipe your tears; you were so confused.
"Pu-ll me out." That time, he spoke just above a whisper, but you still heard him and were still confused.
The Doctor then rushed in and quickly assessed Tommy; Ada stood behind in the distance. 
You stayed next to Tommy; you held his hand instead of his head, out of the Doctor's way. 
Before you knew it, other nurses had pushed the wheels into a moving position. They were about to take off towards the surgery room. You jogged alongside them to the room.
"It's going to be OK, Tommy; they're going to take good care of you, OK?" You squeezed his hand for reassurance.
"In t-he-" 
"What, what did you say?" You leaned closer to his face to hear him better.
"In the Bleak Mid-winter" 
You had reached the surgical room and let his hand go; you didn't want to put up a fight; this wasn't your specialty. You knew you would only delay his care if you fought to be in the room when you weren't needed. 
You had slowly walked back to the ER; your mind raced so fast you couldn't keep up.
You had heard that before; you didn't know where, but you were sure you'd heard "In a bleak mid-winter" before. And not at church but in a way Tommy just said, in a "final good-bye" kind of way 
You were so confused and so caught up in your thoughts that you didn't even realize that you had made it back to the ER. Once you pushed through the door, you were immediately rushed by Tommy's family, who asked you a million questions. 
You backed up a bit before speaking.
"I don't know anything. I don't know if he will live or die. I don't know the extent of his injuries. All I know is that he's in good hands; this Doctor is the best in the county. " 
Even though no one seemed satisfied with your answer, they all backed off. You had decided to lead them to the same private room they were in before to await Tommy's fait. You had been waiting no longer than 20 minutes when a nurse came in; you had all gotten a bit nervous, someone coming in so soon. 
He had to be dead. 
He wasn't, though, and the nurse had just come to gather some information about Tommy.
Ada helped, and you stared off, trying to remember. You weren't listening to them, but she said something that caught your attention.
"What did you say?" You asked Ada; you had pushed yourself slightly out of your seat to get closer to her and hear her properly.
"I said Tommy was a tunneler in the war and had been in a Tunnel collapse." 
You nodded your head slowly as you sat back down, 
"In a bleak mid-winter," you whispered as you slowly remembered where you had heard that before; your head was starting to hurt as the memories came rushing back in. 
It all started to make sense now, from your first in contour, the way he looked at you, and why he trusted you so quick without even knowing you, not only with his life but with his men, Grace, and his son. The reason he pays your rent and the reason you have a protection detail. 
You never understood it before; you never understood how you made such an impression on Tommy after one night or why he made you a constant in his life.
But now you understand, this isn't the first time you met Tommy.
You met him all those years ago when you dug him out of the dirt, brought him back, and saved his life. 
That's what he meant with Grace, how you saved him but couldn't save her.
He knew who you were this whole time, yet he didn't say anything.
Why didn't he say anything? 
91 notes · View notes
hisunshiine · 1 year
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—i kiss your waist and ease your mind [6/7]
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Part 6 of 7 of the Seven Days Series ↣ series masterlist
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🗓️pairing: nurse!jungkook x teacher!reader 🗓️au/genre: non-idol au, brother’s friend au, fwb, age-gap(reader is older), f2l, fluff, angst, smut 🗓️rating: M 🗓️wc: 6,323 + text message 🗓️warnings: angst, mentions of Gwangju Uprising, casualties from the Uprising, hospitals, argument, hurt feelings, minor character death, grief explicit sexual content: unprotected sex, creampie, grief/comfort sex?   🗓️an 0.5: WELL, THE POST WAS ACCIDENTALLY DELETED AND ONLY SHOWS IN CERTAIN SITUATIONS, SO I HAD TO RE-UPLOAD. 🗓️an: well, well, well…back again for some pain, are you? I would apologize for how this ends, but it’s necessary for the set up of the final day of the week, and truly, I think it makes the final day that much more better if we have to hurt a little bit more, right? Thank you for reading, and again, I appreciate my beta readers for all of their help!   🗓️summary: “i kiss your waist and ease your mind.” The only thing that could make you feel better is the same thing that made you feel worse. You and Jungkook are both confused with your emotions, but two different stories help you both see a bit more clearly. The only problem is that when the two of you get around each other, clarity goes bye-bye. don’t let these soft lyrics fool you; make up sex doesn’t actually solve any issues if sex is the only communication that happens.  
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Taglist: @sizzlingfestpeach @mochminnie @jungkooksmytype @kookslastbutton @taebangtanbabe @bbtsficrecs @jk97bam it’s not letting me tag you (if joining the taglist, please think about reblogging with tags/leaving feedback!)
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Last night could not have been any worse for Jungkook—well, he’s sure it could have—but luckily the worst that could’ve been, had not come to be. Today, however, is proving itself to be a challenge in its own right. Jungkook knew he had to work early in the morning, but was alright with going out last night because he was with you. 
Last night honestly had been turning into a great night—the way you had silently laid your claim to him at the club, possessive of him in a healthy way—Jungkook thought things were progressing in the right direction. And clearly, you did, too. Hell, he knew he was all over you last night. Knew that he was taking a huge risk in advancing the relationship past friends with benefits when he threw all caution out the window to kiss you like that in front of your friends, but at the time, Jungkook didn’t care. 
And now? Well, that would be a different story, seeing as now that several people know that you’re the one he’s been fucking every night, they might all think something more should come from this situation. Jungkook doesn’t know what to tell them if they ask, and he’s been avoiding Jimin every chance he gets during his shift so far, because he doesn’t really know what to say. He walks to the nurses station to grab his oversized water bottle, drinking several large gulps before being interrupted. 
“Jeon, we have a case that’s just moved over to us, can you help?” Park Soo-hyun, the head nurse for the shift, asks him. As he lowers the semi-transparent canister, he takes in her cotton candy pink hair, which is mussed in a few places; the corners of her eyes are pinched with stress.
“Yeah, no problem.” Jungkook sets the bottle back on the shelf, and follows the shorter Nurse Park down the hallway to the right of the nurses station and watches as she pauses at the elevators to press the call button. Jungkook slows his walk and raises an eyebrow at his fellow nurse. 
“Sorry, we need the help on another unit,” she shrugs, elbow extending her arm to pass Jungkook a slim tablet with the patient's info pulled up. 
“Honestly, that’s perfect.” Escaping to a different floor means almost zero percent chance of Jungkook running into Jimin, so he strolls into the elevator with no regrets. 
Jungkook scrolls past the general information to see just exactly what he’s dealing with as the metal carriage rises. 
His heart breaks a little when he sees that this case is a hospice care one—a focus on the quality of life at the end of it. He follows Nurse Park, barely noticing as he puts one foot after the other, approaching the room. There are several acronyms listed in bold to the left of the door. This clues him into the fact that the goal has shifted from treatment care to comfort. 
Jungkook sees a sleeping, elderly woman in the hospital bed closest to the window, her grey hair pulled away from her face in a short ponytail. Next to her side is a similarly (he assumes) aged man, holding her wrinkled hand in his own. It is a sight that tugs at Jungkook’s heart; he doesn’t usually struggle with the elderly, just small children who end up in this unit, but with how he’s currently feeling about you, he thinks it's impacting him more than he’s used to. 
“Mr. Kim? This is Nurse Jeon. He’ll be with you and your wife for most of today,” Soo-Hyun says kindly as she pats Jungkook’s back in a motherly nature. “Please let him know if you need anything, okay?” She passes Jungkook a small phone, which he pockets, and leaves him in the sunlit room. He steps closer, pulling up the doctor’s chair to sit; a small, rolling, cushioned stool in hospital green. He glances at their names on the whiteboard. Patient: Jung Min-Ji, Spouse: Kim Tae-Woo.
“Hi, Mr. Kim,” Jungkook starts, voice gentle and quiet so as not to disturb the sleeping woman.
“Hello,” Mr. Kim replies, voice weathered with time and wisdom. “We’re okay, son, you don’t need to sit with this old man.”
Jungkook is no stranger to the phrases the older generation tend to say when in this position. The feelings of being a burden on the hospital staff, guilt for brief thoughts blaming their loved one for being in this position, grief that they could possibly lose their loved one—they’re all valid emotions, and a lot for a person to bear. Especially an elderly man who appears to be carrying this weight alone. Instead of responding to his statement, Jungkook changes the topic. “How did the two of you meet?”
The man’s eyes sparkle to life as he looks at Jungkook’s eager face. “Oh, we’ve known each other since we were kids. She was the most beautiful girl in the village, and I was just some dumb kid who followed her around like a puppy. She’s older than me, you see, and I was the annoying little brother of her best friend.” He smiles fondly at her sleeping form, and Jungkook feels his chest grow tight. “She used to hate my guts. My friends and I would terrorize her and her friends, pull their ponytails, leave frogs in their backpacks, all the terrible things thirteen-year-old boys would do to pretty girls they were afraid to talk to.”
“No wonder she hated you, Mr. Kim!” Jungkook laughs. “I’m guessing you finally stopped tormenting her if she ended up married to you?” Jungkook points out.
“Yes, yes.” The man chortles fondly as he reminisces. “I finally grew up, and realized that treating her badly was not the way to her heart. A little too late, though. She ended up married to some other punk in the neighborhood. He wisened up a little faster than I did, told her how he felt one winter, and they were married by the time the cherry blossoms bloomed.” He sighs, and Jungkook tilts his head, questioning. “Oh, I was distraught. I couldn’t do anything about it, though, I realized that I missed my chance, busy playing games. I ended up married to one of her friends, and well, we spent the next fifteen years circling each other.”
“Wow, that must’ve been hard to deal with.” Jungkook can’t imagine being in his shoes. Or well, he can, but he doesn’t want to imagine that future for himself. Doesn’t want to see a future where he stands in suit and tie to take wedding photos, and it’s not you next to him in them.
“Oh, I loved her enough, my ex-wife, but I think she always knew deep down that she wasn’t…she wasn’t Min-Ji.” Jungkook can see his hand tighten imperceptibly around his wife’s frail one. “We never had kids, and when I came home from work one day to find her waiting with her things packed...I think I always knew that day would come.”
“So, how did you end up winning over Min-Ji?” Jungkook is intrigued by the man’s story. He doesn’t know what he would do in this situation.
“Oh, I wouldn’t call it that. She was thirty-two with a new-born daughter, and left a widow after the Gwangju Uprising. Her husband was one of the many lost that summer. I was freshly twenty-eight, newly single, with an empty house, and still in love with her. I stepped up as her friend, offering her and her daughter a place to live and slowly we became a family. I asked her to marry me a couple years later and she said yes.” Kim Tae-Woo’s eyes water, and even in the dimly lit room, Jungkook can see the love he has for the woman in front of him. 
“That’s an amazing story, Mr. Kim. I’m glad you found each other.”
“Oh, me too. She’s given me everything I never knew I wanted. Three children and the best forty-three years of my life. She’s my everything.” He turns back to Jungkook, a look on his face that he can’t read. “Do you have someone, Nurse Jeon? Someone you love more than your own life?”
The question throws Jungkook for a loop, because the whole time his patient’s spouse was telling their story, there was only one person who crossed his mind. You. He hesitates to answer, but Mr. Kim was honest with him, and Jungkook is sure that he can be vulnerable with this man, too. 
“Yeah, I think I do.”
—————
“Stop staring at your phone and moping, oh my god.” Yoongi rolls his eyes at your mood, whispering to Leah about how you’re the rain cloud following them around, ready to ruin the wedding tomorrow. 
You glance at the message one last time before locking your phone and stuffing it into your hoodie’s front pocket. 
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You hate that you and Jungkook ended the night like you did, even more that he didn’t text you his usual morning text. The thumbs-up emoji haunted your dreams last night, and you barely slept, waking up throughout the night. The bags under your eyes reflect the nightmares, a fact your annoying little brother enjoyed pointing out when they picked you up at 10 AM.
-10 am flashback
“Shush Yoongi!” Leah berated him gently, “need I remind you how you looked after our almost break-up?”
“Hey! I thought we promised never to bring that up again!” Yoongi pouted the whole trip to the wedding venue for the final review of the plans. 
-end
You sit back in the chair, your head facing away from the floor-to-ceiling window of the wedding venue, wishing not for the first (or even second) time that things had gone down differently last night. Sorting through all of your feelings is a lot harder than you thought it would be. Especially with your brother’s looming nuptials while seated in a decorated wedding hall. 
“I’m not moping, jackass.” You pick at non-existent lint on the sleeve of your hoodie before tilting your head back and allowing the hood to fall off. “I just don’t know what to do with myself.”
“We’re almost done. Leah is just dropping off the last of the checks for the vendors, and we are running through the ‘Day-Of’ itinerary one last time with the planner. Then we can grab some lunch, and you can fill us in on the troubles running through that head of yours.”
“Sushi?” You make your eyes big and pout your bottom lip as you turn your head to look your brother in the face. He looks good; his hair is freshly done with an undercut cropped close to his head and the top layers falling in organized, chaotic layers. He has a healthy glow about him that screams ‘happy and in love’, that makes you feel wisps of green envy. His face breaks out into a smile, eyes disappearing in delight. 
“Of course, princess. Whatever you want, if it means you’ll be in a better mood.”
Hearing Yoongi call you ‘princess’ reminds you of Jungkook, and you turn away again, hiding your crestfallen look as Leah walks back into the room with the wedding planner. Yoongi leaves you to join his soon-to-be wife’s side, shaking hands with the wedding planner as they bid her goodbye and motion for you to meet them at the exit. 
Finally supplied with sustenance, you feel a little better as you chew and swallow the tempura-fried shrimp drizzled in spicy aioli sauce. Though that feeling dissipates a bit when Yoongi sets a deliberate gaze on you. 
“Spill it. I know you're moping about Jungkook, but what happened? Do I have to kill him?” he attempts to make you smile, but the joke falls flat with you today. 
“To be honest, it all happened really fast. One second we were good, really good. And then he just kind of shut down and called me a taxi and kicked me out at like 2 AM.”
“Wait, that dickhead kicked you out at 2 AM? I should fucking kill him! What if something had happened to you?” Yoongi’s ears are red and his eyes glint in anger. Leah reaches out a hand to soothe him as you speak quickly to do the same.
“Nothing happened to me. I’m a big girl, Yoongi. I’m pretty sure I said some hurtful things to him, and if the situation was reversed, I would’ve asked him to leave, too. If I had been a little more sober, I probably would’ve left on my own volition instead of getting into an argument.”
“If you don’t mind me asking,” Leah cuts in tentatively, “you do like Jungkook, right? Like not just as a friend?”
Your face says everything your mouth won’t as you shift in your seat. Leah nods knowingly, and Yoongi takes a deep breath. 
“Okay. You’ve already told Mom and Dad that you’re dating him or whatever, so what’s holding you back from taking that step with him if you like him so much?”
It takes everything in you to not cut your eyes at him. You see Leah cover her mouth; the mirth there doesn’t match the situation, but she can’t help but feel like her very smart and emotionally aware fiance is missing some important social factors. You don’t blame her for the smile, in fact, you welcome it, knowing full well that she gets it.
“What’s holding me back? Maybe that conversation with Mom earlier this week, where she nagged at me for being single and not giving her grandkids, and then when I told her I was seeing someone, she ridiculed Jungkook’s age? Or how about the fact that the stupid goth art teacher talked shit about how young Jungkook was?” You shake your head, defeated. “Everyone judges the relationship between me and Jungkook, before it’s even a relationship. So what happens when it is real?”
“What changed?” Leah’s brows are furrowed, and you can see her mind sorting through the information you’ve given, or lack thereof. “Something must have happened to make what you had going no longer work for either of you, right?”
You decide to trust them both and tell the truth of what happened.
“So after we left the club, we went back to his place since it was late. Taehyung, Jimin, and Hoseok are now fully aware that there’s something between me and Jungkook because he wasn’t exactly subtle. To be fair, I didn’t stop him either, so I guess if I’m being honest, we weren’t exactly subtle. We get back to his place, and it’s business as usual.” Yoongi grimaces as he reaches for his whiskey, downing the entire thing as you skim most of the sex, though a memory surfaces as you let the night replay in your mind. 
“Oh god!” You slap your hands to your face, covering your mouth. “I just remembered…I kind of let slip that I loved him while having sex,” you mumble into your hands, head dropping down in embarrassment. “And then right afterwards he’s receiving a ‘you up?’ text from SoHee—with a fucking topless picture!—and I just lost it. There was an argument, which I honestly can barely remember what was said. We were both so mad, you know?”
“Wow, no wonder you were mad. I’m guessing he didn’t say anything about your confession,” Leah questions, validating your feelings in a way that warms your heart. You definitely think you and your new sister-in-law (as of tomorrow) will get along great.
“No, he didn’t. And it’s not even that he has to say it back or anything, I didn’t say it for that reason, but the fact that we just had—”
“Please don’t say it again!” Yoongi interrupts.
“I wasn’t! Anyways, the fact that we just had such an intimate moment happen, and here comes SoHee texting Jungkook her perky tits asking if he’s awake? I know a booty call text when I see one.” 
“Wait, but you just said SoHee texted it to Jungkook, right?” Yoongi sits back, a quizzical look on his face. “So, he got a text from SoHee and you got jealous. But I’m gonna be that person right now and point out to you that technically, you and Jungkook aren’t together.”
“Yeah, thanks for stating the obvious,” you say with a roll of your eyes. “Anyways, we were in the bathroom,” you think back through the specifics. “His phone went off, and he set it down to dry my hair, and then it went off again. The message lit up his phone, so I saw the text from SoHee.”
“Sis, you know I love you, but I think you’re jumping to conclusions. It sounds like Jungkook was just the recipient of the messages, not necessarily the instigator. Guys can receive unsolicited tit pics just as much as women get dick pics. People just think all men are horny 24/7, but we also can feel uncomfortable in these situations. If we’re at work or start dating someone new, and an old flame sends us a ‘you up’ text or sends nudes? Not to mention, sometimes we just aren’t attracted to the people sending us stuff. It causes issues no one asked for.” 
Yoongi’s eyes show no malice as he speaks a truth you’re upset with yourself for not realizing in that drunken stupor, or even in the light of today. “Jungkook’s hot, you know? He could’ve just been the recipient of unsolicited nudes. He might actually get quite a few that he ignores, because that man is high-key in love with you.” 
“Honestly, I’ve seen you and Jungkook together, and I agree. Who cares what other people think, especially the ones who don’t know either of you well enough and shouldn’t matter enough to sway your happiness with each other.” Leah looks at Yoongi, and he takes her hand gently. “This wedding tomorrow will not be my first one, but it’s the one that matters the most to me. Your brother loves me on a level that I never knew was possible, thanks to my ex, and though our age gap isn’t as big as yours with Jungkook, I’m still older than him. Both of these are things your mom took issue with, but you know your brother.” She looks over to him with a fondness you understand. It’s how you look at Jungkook. “The only thing that matters is what you and Jungkook want. I know it’s not easy, but it’s infinitely worth it.”
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By the time Jungkook finishes a sponge-bath and documents the care Min-Ji received during this time, he realizes it’s past the typical lunch time and that the husband has yet to eat. The three children he mentioned live on the other side of the country, but are traveling now to be with their parents. He had hoped they would arrive earlier with the promised food Mr. Kim is waiting for, but Jungkook insists he get something to hold the man over for the time being. He reminds him of which buttons to press to contact the phone in Jungkook’s pocket, then heads to the canteen.
The employees share the cafeteria area with the visiting families of patients, and it is bustling quite a bit as Jungkook exits the elevators straight into the lobby of the cafe. To the left, the room extends into a seating area once past the cashier lines, and Jungkook sees the moment SoHee spots him through the crowd. 
He’s tired of hiding from people—tired of hiding from his feelings, really—so he decides not to run away this time. If SoHee decides to talk about the messages she sent last night, he will address it and let her down easily. They’re still friends, in Jungkook’s mind, so he smiles at her as she approaches him, soft pink scrubs swishing lightly from her quick steps.
“I am so excited about the wedding tomorrow!”
Jungkook can tell; her smile is glowing. Once upon a time, he might’ve been enthralled by it, it’s still a beautiful smile, and it sucks to know that he might be the reason it fades in a few moments.
“Yeah, me too. I actually wanted to talk to you about it.”
“Yes, that’s why I came over here, in fact, so we could finish coordinating and—”
“SoHee, wait.” Jungkook knows he’s being rude, cutting her off, but the longer she stands there, grinning up at him like that, the more his chest feels tight. “I can’t be your date for the wedding.”
As he predicted, the rosy apples of SoHee’s cheeks lower along with her smile as she processes his words.
“I don’t think I understand?” She's polite as she speaks, head quirked to the side as if showcasing her confusion, but Jungkook is no fool to the glint of a woman’s eye as she braces for battle. 
“I know that it took me a lot longer than I promised to get back to you about this, but I’ve only just figured things out myself, and I just don’t want to string you along.”
“What have you been doing then, if not stringing me along?” SoHee crosses her arms across her chest, stance shifting to one of defensiveness. “I’m not trying to be a bitch, Jungkook, but from my point of view, it kind of seems like you’ve been doing exactly what you claim you don’t want to do.”
Jungkook sighs, restraining himself from rolling his eyes at her words and tone. He can’t help but feel that SoHee is being a bit dramatic—it’s not like he was the one who started all this wedding date talk, and he never even agreed to be her date! He did put off turning her down, but she’s the one who texted him to say he didn’t need to feel obligated to take her. And then she sends nudes and a booty-call text message at the worst possible moment last night and wants to get mad at him?
“Look, SoHee, I know that you probably feel like I’m the bad guy in this, but—”
“You’re an asshole, Jungkook.” SoHee’s voice carries a little too well, and other nurses standing nearby tune into the conversation. He really hates public confrontation like this, especially when he didn’t do anything wrong, and yet, here he is dealing with this bullshit.
Jungkook doesn’t mean the words he says in the way that they come out, but he feels cornered. “What do you want me to say, SoHee? ‘I’m sorry that I like somebody else’? Or possibly, I’m sorry that you sending me nudes I never asked for at 2 AM fucked up my relationship?” He probably could’ve said it with a little less attitude, probably should’ve held back from the second example, especially when he sees the way SoHee’s eyes begin to fill with tears as she looks at all of the gawking bystanders. One of the other nurses walks over and places an arm around SoHee’s shoulder, glaring daggers at Jungkook as if willing him to keel over on the glossy linoleum. 
“You really are an asshole, Jeon. Why would you say that to someone, in front of a crowd? You have no tact.” 
Jungkook is about to fire back at the other woman, but a hand on his shoulder reigns him back in despite his blood continuing to boil.
“Janice, why don’t you escort SoHee to the employee lounge for a bit? I’ll have a chat with Jungkook here.”
Frozen eyes sending a final chilling glare, the women disappear as Jungkook finally moves through the cafe line to the cashier, Jin following quietly. He continues to shadow Jungkook as he makes his way back to the palliative care and hospice unit to deliver the food. As he rounds the doorway, he sees that the patient’s adult children have arrived, a few grandchildren as well. 
To his surprise, Min-Ji is awake, but this only makes him worry about what’s to come. He sets the food to the side, greeting the members of Min-Ji’s family as he does a quick check of Min-Ji’s breathing. The pattern appears abnormal—though normal for someone approaching the end of life. He’s glad her family made it in time to see her; he knows that before the day is out, possibly even before his shift ends, she’ll quietly cross the veil.
Jungkook slips back out of the room to give the family some privacy, and to meet with Jin, who he knows is waiting for him. The two men walk to a nearby empty nurses’ desk, and Jungkook waits expectantly for Jin to speak. 
“Well, that went swimmingly.”
“All thanks to you, my friend,” Jungkook responds snidely, “not only is SoHee mad at me, I’m also not talking to You-Know-Who right now because of a pretty serious fight we had last night.”
“Calm down, she’s not Voldemort,” Seokjin snorts out. “But you two fought about something serious?”
“Yeah…She was at my place last night and saw a series of messages from SoHee that included a nude. She kind of went spastic on me, accusing me of requesting the nudes from SoHee after having sex with her because I’m ‘too young’ to behave any differently. I honestly was so angry, I called her a taxi and sent her home.” 
Seokjin blinks at Jungkook dumbfoundedly before speaking. “Maybe if you’d already told our dear friend you’re banging his sister, and then told her that you want to date her, none of this would have even been able to happen.”
“This advice would’ve been better than encouraging SoHee’s imagination,” Jungkook grumbles out, though his voice takes a softer tone when he says your name as he continues, “if she had wanted to date her brother’s youngest friend, I think she would’ve said something by now.”  The condescension towards the age gap is laced through every word. Seokjin ponders his words before speaking his point of view.
“You know, I think that maybe the two of you put too much weight on this age gap. Even now, you’re taking on this submissive role, waiting for her to tell you or make the first move. But let me tell you a little something about women. No matter their age, they want someone who isn’t afraid to want them back. And you, my friend, are shaking in your scrubs.”  
“I’m not scared,” Jungkook instantly defends, but even he can hear the lie whistle through his teeth.
“Then why are you waiting for her to make all the decisions? Why haven’t you had an adult conversation, sat her down, and told her what you wanted for a change?”
“Because I—” Jungkook pauses, unsure of how to answer. In all realness, he is scared. He enjoys what the two of you have going on, and he worries that if he speaks up for what he wants, if he asks you to change the friends-with-benefits status to something real…being incinerated by the sun after being lit on fire by jet engine fuel would hurt less than the hypothetical rejection he fears. 
Seokjin just gives him a knowing look, his eyes soft with empathy for his younger friend's dilemma. “Just talk to her. Show her you want her, and not just in a friends-with-benefits way.” He once again gives Jungkook that knowing look. “Tomorrow is the perfect opportunity to clear the air. Everyone loves a good wedding.”
“Except SoHee is also going to be there.”
Seokjin curses lowly under his breath and is about to say more when Jungkook’s phone begins to emit a shrill tone for attention. The two men silently make their way back to Min-Ji’s room, knowing that if the phone is ringing, it’s not for any good reason.
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It’s been a long day full of revelations. The long talk with your brother and his soon-to-be wife has left you feeling drained and empty. Sitting on your couch, you open up the app to order food from your favorite takeout place barely a block away. Carelessly, you reorder the last meal you placed before slumping backwards into the plush cushions. 
Now that you’ve ordered, you really wish you had chosen delivery, like the lazy ass you want to be, but it’s not that far from your place. You close your eyes for what feels like a moment, but an alert jerks you out of the light slumber you’d slipped into. Your food is ready to be picked up. Sighing, you rock back then forward to lift yourself from the sunken spot on your comfortable couch and shrug on Jungkook’s hoodie for the trek. 
The weather teases a light rainfall, the petrichor scent enveloping you as you quicken your steps through the glass door of the establishment. Approaching the counter, the cashier recognizes you and pulls your order—two plastic bags with a brown paper bag inside each full of steaming hot food.
Checking the receipt stapled to the first bag, you see that you’ve accidentally ordered twice as much food; your last placed order was a meal for two, and the extra food? Jungkook’s favorite dishes from here. With resignation, you grab both bags, attempting to balance them on each forearm and use your foot to push open the door, but the door swings open as a man with an umbrella steps through. 
Jungkook says your name as if it's a curse and a prayer, sidestepping back onto the sidewalk to hold the door for you to exit. You thank him, fully intending to keep walking past him, but he follows you instinctively. 
“Let me help,” he says, his hand reaching out to grab one of the bags, and like muscle memory, you allow it, both of you walking in tandem until you reach your place. Unlocking the front door, he follows you in if only to set down the bag, but you stop him with a hand to his wrist before he can leave. 
“I, uh, accidentally ordered your favorites when I rushed my last reorder. You can have it, if you want. I can’t eat all of this.”
Jungkook just shrugs, and you finally notice how he looks. It’s not good—well, he always looks good; he can pull off anything. It’s more so that he doesn’t look well; his face is pale, eyes listless and devoid of any joy, parts of his face a bright red from being picked at. It’s one of his habits you’re well aware of, like when he bites his nails when nervous. Reaching into the bag, you lift out the container and pass it to him along with napkins and utensils. Taking the food from you, he steps into your living room, plopping down onto your couch as if muscle memory has taken over, he takes off the lid and begins the motions of eating the meal.
Your own thoughts are racing, unsure of what to do or say, so you just say nothing, instead pouring two glasses of water and delivering them to the coffee table before going back for your food. You end up sitting on the smaller couch, the corner closest to where he sits on the larger couch. The room fills with the sounds of you eating, an awkwardness that never used to be there lingering in the air. Your eyes flit from your food to Jungkook’s slow movements, so after you swallow your most recent bite, you take a sip of water before speaking.
“Is everything okay, Jungkook?” The urge to call him ‘baby’—to cuddle him to you and comfort him—is strong, but you resist.
His hand moves the food around a bit, and you watch him as he gathers himself to reply. It feels like hours, but he finally looks at you. “Yeah, I just had a really hard case today. It was a hospice patient, and I spent most of the day with her husband. Well, second husband—but the love of her life, I’m sure.” 
“Oh,” you don’t know what to say; you’re not really sure what made the case so hard, so you wait for Jungkook to elaborate.
“They, uh, knew each other for a long time, since they were kids, you know? But he was the younger brother of her best friend, and she married someone else before he worked up the courage to pursue her. He ended up married to one of her friends instead, but she left him. He said his first wife knew that no one could compete with the girl he actually loved. So when the first husband died in the Gwangju Uprising, leaving her a single mom with a small baby, he stepped in to provide them with a place to live and just help out, but they ended up together eventually and they have a big family.” Jungkook’s eyes look back at his food, a bit teary. “I met their kids and grandkids. They arrived right before she—” he clears his throat, but a small tear sneaks down his cheek.
You reach out for him, pulling the food from his hands and placing it on the table. You scoot closer to him, taking his hands into yours as he looks down at where the two of you connect. He sniffles, trying to stabilize his voice before he continues with his story.
“They arrived right before she passed. She’d been asleep the whole time I was there with her husband, but once everyone arrived, she woke up and was talking to them all, told them she loved them one last time, and then she just…slipped away. I don’t think I can ever forget the sound her husband made as he cried.”
“Oh, Jungkook…” unable to bear it, you join him on the same couch, holding him close to you as he cries. Your own eyes are wet; something about this couple’s story resonates with you after everything that you’ve experienced today.
“I can’t imagine going through that,” Jungkook says with a wobbly voice. “Losing the person that you love the most in the world? I mean, he almost avoided having to go through this, she married someone else! And the chance comes around for him to be with her and he takes it, but the way he cried when he lost her…I’m not sure it’s worth it in the end.” 
His words cut like a knife to your heart. You want to remind him of the good that he told in the story, how the couple had a large family, how the wife was surrounded by the evidence of their love when she died. How the man taking that second chance meant a single mom and her baby had a better life—that anguish he felt when he lost her was because they shared a love like no other. To you, it’s always worth it. 
Instead of saying what you want to say, you ask him what he needs. And those beautiful teary eyes look up at you and he whispers one word; “You,” and you’re unable to say no to him. Not when his lips meet yours with a desperation that you can’t begin to decipher, not when his hands pull you closer, and he clings to you like a lifeline, and definitely not when he sighs out your name against your lips, as if the simple utterance fills him with solace and relief of all that ails him.
His strong hands relieve you of your clothing as his lips remain fervently attached to yours. You relish in the feel of him as your naked form meets his own body, skin to skin, while he lays you back onto the couch. His kiss leaves you dazed; you have no idea how long it took for you both to end up naked, and by the time the question is flying through your mind, Jungkook is already nestled between your thighs, his cock hard and throbbing pressed against your lower stomach and your ankles crossed at his lower back.
When he pulls away slightly—reaching to line himself up with your slick opening—you bite his bottom lip where it was resting against your own, and the sensation causes him to surge his hips forward, fucking himself deep inside you. The intrusion is orgasmic, stretching you to a fullness you only experience when he doesn’t take time to prep you. Jungkook is needy, fraught with a raw emotion he can’t yet put words to, but his body can.
With each stroke, he finds comfort, the grip of your walls building the friction to a pleasurable high that he wants to drown in. Is there anything better to ease his mind than to be buried inside of you? He knows you're close, can feel the way you quicken—hurtling towards climax as you dig your nails into his back and cry out his name. Your body wrapped around him brings him a level of peacefulness that allows his mind to empty and his heavy cock to release thick spurts of cum until you're full and leaking around his softening member. 
You lay underneath him, holding him close as his chest rises and falls, and he peppers kisses along your shoulder. His movements are slow and you can feel the effects of the day taking over and pulling him into sleep. He slides his body so that the two of you are back to front, him curling around you as the big spoon. He grasps the blanket you keep across the top of the couch and attempts to cover you both, but you take over for him. 
He drops his arm around your waist, pulling you closer to his chest as he kisses the back of your head once more. 
“I’m sorry, Princess,” he mutters before he’s softly snoring, and you lay there in his embrace, contemplating what his apology could be for. 
Was he apologizing for sending you home last night? For that thumbs up he sent that ruined your day? Because he feels bad that he only made you cum once after using your body to make himself feel better?  It’s only when you’re about to drift off that you remember his words about his patient, and your mind wonders if his apology is telling you sorry because he can’t give you what you want the most. Himself.
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stay tuned for “i’ll be loving you right, seven days a week” coming 9-?-2023!
↣all rights reserved © hisunshiine 2023. please do not repost. translations & modifications are not allowed.
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strrykais · 22 days
Text
die with a smile
a hwang hyunjin short story
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week one
he couldn’t hear the doctor with the buzzing in his ears. he refused to believe it. he was sick. the doctor said cancer. no he felt fine. there was no way he could be sick. the light shaking of his shoulder brought him out of the little daze he was in. 
“hyunjin are you okay? did you hear the doctor.” his friend said. 
the tears in his eyes started to fog up his vision, slowly tumbling out his eyes. the doctor in front of him, pulls out tissues softly handing them to the crying boy.
”i understand this news can be very hard to take in, we are lucky that we were able to catch it in it’s earlier stages. if you don't mind we would like to have you stay here for some testing.” the doctors voice did nothing to help the breaking heart of his. he should be happy they caught it because if it was too late, he didn’t even want to think of that. 
hyunjin nods, his friend patting him on the back saying its going to be okay and that he is in good hands.
a soft knock on the door followed by a girls head poking in with a bright smile. “good afternoon doctor kim. is this the new impatient?” the girl turns her head from the doctor to stare at him. hyunjin felt awkward, his face was tearfilled and you gave him a bright smile. 
“hi yn. yes this is hyunjin, he will be staying here for a while, and how did you come by this news?” the doctor says placing the charts down on his desk. 
“word travels fast; we don't really get many inpatient's anymore. can i walk him?” hyunjin finally looked away at the girl in the doctor's coat leaning fully on the door frame. 
“yn this isnt your job, how many times do i have to sa-“ 
“i know, ill just walk him to nurse lee. im heading that way anyways.” you say practically begging. hyunjin couldn’t understand why you was so eager to walk him to his ending doom. some people love to see others suffer or something.
the doctor sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. you smile walking further in to grab the charts only for the doctor to slam his hand over top of them.
”nice try kid. hyunjin this is yn she will be leading you to the care unit. please just ignore anything she says. she likes to talk alot. also if i can speak to your friend for a little and then i can send him your way.” hyunjin nods, following you out the door. 
the hospital smell was sickening, hyunjin couldn’t get his mind off the devastating news. trying to distract himself, hyunjin watches yn. the little skip in your step, the doctor's coat that seemed a little too big for you. he watched how you interacted with the other doctors laughing or with other patients like himself. It made him sick. there was no reason for someone to be happy in this moment. 
you stopped in front of the nurses station talking to someone. she waves over to him, he slowly takes steps till he standing right next to your smaller form. 
“this is nurse lee they will be taking care of you from now on. trust me you are in gentle hands.” you say bye waving to him and the nurses at the station. hyunjins eyes continue to follow you till you round a corner no longer in sight. the nurse in front of him called him out, then showed him to his room.
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tags : @hannamoon143 @jellyleggz @tajannah-price1 @skzfelixlove
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imtryingbuck · 4 days
Text
Two
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Pairing: Bucky Barnes x fem!Reader
Summary: Y/n L/n becomes Queen of Astoria not that she wanted to. Prince James of Winterfeld meets her and falls in love.
Word count: 1,893
Warnings: angst. fluff. mentions of being barren. mentions of hunting.
Masterlist   Series Masterlist
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Sitting in the chair that her father had been sitting in only two months prior with a crown sitting upon her head that she was surprised her neck had not yet broke with the weight of the thing, she tried not to wince at the pinching of the corset.
She had been crowned as the rightful heir to the throne and was now Queen. The whole hall erupted into cheers and chants, “Long live the Queen” and “The warrior Queen” hit her ears as she sat with her back straight. The knights all bent their knee to her - Carlson in front of them all, smiling up at her as he pledged his allegiance to her. She saw the scowl coming from Sir Jon as he nursed his ale, she smiled at him just to piss him off a little extra.
The celebration was loud with music and chatter from those in the hall, the smell in the air was intoxicating with food and ale - a lot of that was going to the floor as the guests danced. Everyone including her mother, sisters and Carlson were laughing and dancing, celebrating their new Queen. 
But Y/n, she just couldn’t find it in herself to join in the festivities she just wanted to be left alone or preferably in the woods training with Carlson and some of the other men, or better yet she wished that she was far away from the kingdom as she could possibly get. Looking around slowly making sure no eyes were on her as they were to busy dancing and having conversations amongst themselves, she stood and walked out of the side door. She found herself out in the private courtyard that only her family were allowed to be in, she took the crown off releasing a content and relieved sigh. The cold air soothed the ache of her chest as she looked up to the darkened sky smiling as the stars twinkled.
“Should have known you were going to try and run away. Ah, see you do not startle easily anymore.”
“I could smell you before I heard your boring voice.” She replied still staring up at the stars. “And do you see me running? The answer is no.”
“Listen here, you should have respect for your elders-“ he barked as he moved closer to her.
“I am not the same thirteen year old who was terrified of you, matter of fact I am more scared of a butterfly than I am of you.”
“You should not even be queen!”
Turning to face the man she had known all her life, the man who taught her how to play chess, the same man who would sneak some extra cake slices onto her plate when her parents weren’t watching. “Why shouldn’t I? I am the first born, my father never had a son, so why should I not be queen?”
“You are rotten. You are a barren bitch, what use are you if you cannot have an heir? You are best to work in the whore house-“
“Along with your mistress? I would rather not hear how dull you are at sex, thank you.”
“Y-you have no idea what you are talking about!”
“No? Red head, big tits, pretty face? A stark contrast from your wife, I must say.”
“Rotten you are-“
“So you have already said.”
“Barren bitch whose only deeming qualities lay on the battle field.”
“Again, you already called me that and also a battle field you have not seen in so many years, too busy hiding behind my father. And may I remind you of who you are talking to? I am the Queen, do not like that fact? Go and jump off the cliff, I will be sure to keep your wife and mistress safe and looked after.”
“You-you- wh-“
“You are embarrassing yourself now. You keep forgetting your station and I will end up removing more than your tongue. Do you understand?”
“Yes.”
“Yes, what?”
“Yes… my Queen.”
“Very good. Run along and leave me in peace.”
“What happened to you? The little girl I knew was nice, sweet and had a heart of gold. Where did that little girl go?” Jon asked her with his hand on the door knob.
“She died the moment you dragged her off that boat. Goodnight Jon.”
Hearing the door slam close she gulped a large breath of air, trying her hardest to keep her heart rate down. She wasn’t scared of him but she did know how dangerous he could be, she had seen it with her own two eyes. When Y/n was younger she use to sit upon a tree stump with her knees pulled up to her chest and watched in fascination as Jon trained the other warriors, she watched in awe of how fast he was though he had years added on to those he was training. And although Jon was friendly and sweet to her she had seen him do things that gave her nightmares or would be afraid to go near him for a few days after. The Jon that stood in front of her just then, calling her those names, wasn’t the same man she had grown up with.
She didn’t know why he was so against something that she didn’t even ask for, he should have taken it out on her father and not her.
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“Jon said I could find you here, old man is too busy drowning his sorrows in the corner- hey what is wrong?”
“Nothing. Go back and enjoy your night. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“You are freezing, come back inside Y/n/n.”
“Would you marry Anna?” She asked changing the subject.
“No. She’s a pretty girl but I do not view her in that way, why?”
“What about my other sisters?”
“No Y/n, what is going on?”
“If you married my sister I could abdicate from the throne and hand it over to you two, and then the kingdom would have a King and a Queen that would have heirs and I could leave and I-I could be happy, I could be free.”
Carlson stood there frozen listening to his friends words, he had half a mind to go back into the hall and attack Jon knowing for sure that he had said something to her for her to be thinking of such things. “You will find a husband of your choosing, hopefully it would be a marriage of love and have your own child-“
“I cannot have them and you know that.”
“You do not know that though. Your father told you that when you was a child Y/n, he was wrong about many of things - he is wrong about this too.”
“I will find a suitable prince for one of the girls-“
“Y/n-“
“I do not want this life Carlson, I never have. And I am not ashamed to admit that I am scared.”
Wrapping his arms around her and pulling her into him, he whispered. “I know. I know you do not want this but I believe in you, I know you will be the best Queen anyone will ever know. I am sorry but this is your life, and please know I will be right by your side every step of the way. I will not allow you to fail or to fall, this I swear to you.”
For the first time since she was sixteen years of age when she was made to take part of the annual hunt and forced by her father to take the life of an innocent deer, she cried. Gripping tightly of Carlson’s shirt she let everything go, the loss of her life, the loss of her fathers life, her stepmother life ending so soon, the unfairness of the life she had to live when she did not want it. She cried and cried until there was nothing left for her to give.
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“Queen Y/n.” Her personal servant bowed as the young girl entered her chambers.
“Larissa, how are you?”
“I-I am very well my queen, how are you?”
“Good, have you eaten today?”
“I have not but-“
“Come sit with me, and enjoy some food. I fear the cooks have given me more than enough.” She sees the hesitation in the young girl’s movements, Y/n pushes a chair out and pats on the seat giving her an encouraging smile.
“Th-thank you my Grace.”
“Do not need to thank me, eat as much as you can”
Larissa was not use to this. She thought at first that she was to be the tester to make sure no one had tried to poison the queen, finding herself frowning when Y/n digs into the food before she does. Larissa had always admired Y/n growing up, always finding herself smiling then she would hear the Princess laughing, when she would have the duty to collect herbs from the woods she would see Y/n fighting against men who were bigger in height and weight to her and would always silently cheer on the Princess and finding herself chuckling to herself when she would win against her opponents. Never in her life did she think she would be handpicked to serve her queen directly, and now here she was eating a breakfast fit for royalty, answering questions that Y/n asked, mind and heart racing as her queen actually paid attention to her words.
The bubble burst for the two of them when a knock came from the door, Larissa goes to stand up but Y/n’s hand came into contact with her arm, “it’s okay. Come in.”
“My Queen.”
“Mother, how are you? Would you like to join me and Larissa to eat? There’s plenty to go around.”
“I have already eaten, but thank you.”
“Your loss. What is it?”
“I need to speak to you, privately, please.” Larissa nods and stands, bowing to the two women she leaves quickly.
“What is wrong?”
Y/n watched as her mother take the seat that Larissa had been occupying, her fingers tugging at the flow of her dress - something she tended to do when she was nervous. A habit she herself had taken up. “Please, please do not be mad.”
“What has happened?”
“Y/n, you need a husband and you know it. You need an heir and that is just how it is, you need to marry in order to have them.”
“Mother, you know-“
“Your father was being a foolish angry man, he did not mean it.”
“But what is he was? What if I am barren and I cannot give my husband what is required of me? I do not, no, I know I cannot go through what you went through. I will not do it, it is not fair on me, the man or the other woman. Please mother, please just drop this. I will figure something out.”
There was a deafening silence that followed her words, mother and daughter just staring at each other waiting for someone to speak. Y/n truly wished she had just bid farewell and left her own chambers to go and train with Carlson even though she knew she had other obligations to attend.
Her mother smiled sadly at her and whispered the words that Y/n had been dreading to hear ever since she was a child.
“I have found you a husband.”
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