#shawnimagines

[brilhantineybag]

DOENTE  - shawn mendes shawn x reader

( primeiro imagine postado aqui vindo diretamente do watt, espero que gostem - aceitando pedidos ) - desculpe se tiver erros

--

Infelizmente hoje eu acordei muito gripada, com o nariz escorrendo e tossindo várias vezes

O que mais está me preocupando é que shawn iria vir aqui, e agora do jeito que eu estou é melhor deixá-lo em casa sozinho mesmo

Não quero correr o risco de fazer meu namorado que é um cantor ter que parar a tour por ficar tossindo no meio da música

E foi só pensar nele que o bendito já estava me ligando

- oi amor - respondi assim que atendi a ligação

- oi linda, sua voz tá mais fina você tá bem? - ele respondeu

Que fofinho ele reparou

- eu peguei uma gripe shawnie, não vai dar mais pra você vir aqui - respondi com a voz manhosa

- e por que não vou pode ir aí pra cuidar da minha namorada?

- você pode acabar pegando também e é bem provável que estrague seus shows - o respondi

- mais meu amor você está doente eu não posso te deixar sozinha nessas condições - ele retrucou tentando ter razão

- e eu não posso correr o risco de você ficar gripado, sei o quanto gosta de cantar e ficar afastado com certeza não é algo que você deseja, ou é?

- ninguém gosta de ficar assim S/n, ainda mais sozinha em casa e sem um namorado pra fazer uma sopinha - ele respondeu forçando a voz pra ficar com o tom mais fofo no final

- não é pra você vir e acabou, melhor um doente do que dois - sentenciei e acabei a conversa

- tudo bem, mais você vai ter que ficar me atualizando de como está a cada cinco minutos tudo bem? - respondeu preocupado

- Tabom amor, te vejo pessoalmente quando melhorar e espero que seja logo - sussurei a última parte

- eu tambem amor, não esqueça das mensagens

Murmurei um tchau e terminamos a ligação, como não tinha nada mais interessante pra fazer decidi pegar um livro qualquer pra ler

Não deu nem 20 minutos e bateram na minha porta e que quando abri tive uma surpresa

- o que está fazendo aqui shawn?

- vim ajudar meu amorzinho - respondeu e já foi entrando em casa com sacolas de farmácia e mercado

E mais uma vez percebi que não adianta contrariar o shawn quando ele quer fazer algo

--

[shittyfandomimagines]

Time- SM

Based off of bits and pieces of NF- “Time” ... song is a bop!

Gif creds to owner

Chord progression for a new song, that’s all you have to do tonight, Shawn. Just finish this and you’ll sleep for at least 8 hours, more than you’ve gotten in a week. — that’s all I’ve been saying to myself for a hot minute now.

I had one version of a progression, but it didn’t feel right, so for the last hour, I’ve been playing different cord combinations to feel something about this song. Nothing felt right with this night, this song, and probably this whole fucking month.

“I made you some supper if you want any, if not I’ll put it away.” Y/n’s head popped inside of the music room, my eyes drifted towards her sullen appearance. I thought I felt sleep-deprived, but she looked it.

“I’ll come down there now, I’m starving.” I saw a quick smile reach her eyes, I could tell she was worrying herself sick about me, I get so entrapped in music that I forget I’m a human with basic needs, like eating.

I followed her down the stairs, she grabbed plates out of the cabinet for us and started to assemble each one.

Baked chicken, Mac n cheese, and scalloped potatoes? A blessing.

She handed my plate over and she took hers too as we made our way to the table.

“What’s your big plan for tomorrow?” She asks while taking a bite of the potatoes. “I have to be up around 4 am, go to the studio with the team for a while, and then a press session with the radio at 1:30,” I tell her and I see some more happiness leave her body, the sullen look was back.

“That’s exciting! New song coming along well?” She even sounded uninterested in the conversation. “Kinda in a rut, I don’t hear or feel the sounds that need to encapsulate the lyrics of my new song,” I explain, even though she probably doesn’t care.

“Maybe you need to stop trying to find it and let it find you. You’ve been working so hard that you’ve burned yourself out this week. Try playing without a reason besides what your heart says instead of your head.” Well damn, maybe she does care. I don’t know why she would, all I do is work and don’t show her the right way that I love her.

“That’s true, you’ve alwa-“ I was cut off by my phone blaring Andrew’s designated ringtone, she knew it too because I could see the disappointment.

“What now?” I ask as soon as I answered, I heard Andrews grunt.

“We need you to come to the studio, we need a meeting with all of the crew about tomorrow’s session with the radio station.”

“That doesn’t make sense? We’re all meeting tomorrow beforehand!”

“I understand, but 2 of the guys won’t be able to make it tomorrow morning, but they can come tonight, so let’s just get this over with so you can go back to being grumpy at home.”

“Whatever, bye.”

I look up to see her disapproval, but she doesn’t say a word as she gets up with the plate in her hand.

“I’m sorry that I can’t finish dinner, if you put it away, I’ll eat it as soon as I get home.” I was nervous to even talk to her, I knew she was pissed; I could tell in the way her left eye was starting to twitch in the slightest way, it mostly happened when pissed or stressed... now it’s both.

“I live to serve.” She mumbles as she grabbed a few ziplock bags, I knew she was pissed, but all it did was make me angry too. I wanted to stay at home and eat a nice meal with my girl.

“I don’t know what you want me to do, I can’t say no to the team.” I snapped and she just looked up, no words left her lips but the look on her face did. It was probably telling me to shut the fuck up.

“Plus, I don’t have to stay in this house 24/7 like you do. Does it not get boring being in this house all day, every day?” I was being bitter and I just continued to dig a bigger hole.

My existence felt like word vomit, I was just spewing out hateful shit and I didn’t even know why. My heart quaked when I saw a tear fall down her cheek, just one though, and she wiped it off hastily before it had the chance to fall onto the counter.

“It does get boring since you asked. It gets boring waiting for a guy to love me, show that he has a heart. To feel like I have to be ready to pick you up at any chance because the work stress is too much, but I know damn well I won’t get any love in return. It gets boring being at the end of the fucking road with your bullshit! So please, by all means, Shawn, leave before you get bored too.” She yelled, I haven’t heard that type of voice since we had our big fight while on tour, so that alone made me anxious.

Then she called my biggest bluff in my attitude, she pointed out my work stress. The stress that had lead to so much anxiety. I felt bad that she knew I was bound to break any day, I could see it causing her just as much anxiety for my wellbeing. I cause her more pain than I ever wanted to.

“Maybe I’d be better off alone,” I said it before I even thought of the consequences of my words.

A string of 6 words and 23 letters that had no absolute truth caused such a look of disdain on her face. I saw a few more tears drop and her lip trembled slightly, I felt my heart shatter.

“I fucking hate you, please fucking go.”

I never felt such a heaviness in my heart until she said that, as I’ve always known our arguments hurt; but that literally broke me. She had so much conviction in her voice that I could tell a part of her meant it. I think?

I walk to my car, chest hurting and mentally debilitating.

——

After a pointless 2 hour meeting and side advice from Teddy, who could tell I fucked up somehow, I was ready to be home to my girl. To apologize all night and to hopefully come home to her still living there.

I walk into the big apartment, the smell of lavender and eucalyptus roaming through the halls. I smiled to myself because I knew she probably had like 4 different diffusers on.

I made my way through the halls, no hot girl in sight.

“Baby?” I call out and there still wasn’t any movement, so my anxiety automatically started filling negative thoughts in my head.

I rushed to our room, hoping to find her asleep, but I didn’t- so more panic set in. I searched everywhere with no luck, until the last spot (where I thought she would not be because we never used this room), the guest room. I chuckled to myself when I saw the eucalyptus oil beside the bedside table.

I could tell she was fucking pissed when she fell asleep, her forehead had creases in it and her face was still scowled.

“Baby, c’mon, wake up. You hate this bed and you need to sleep properly.” I shake her body slightly, she grunted lowly before I started to lift her. She was in my arms and halfway down the hall before she actually woke up, her body jumping with anxiety.

“What the fuck!” She jumped up quickly, I suppressed my laugh as I waited for her to stop trying to leap out of my arms.

“You hate the guest bed so I’m taking you to ours. I’ll sleep on the guest bed or whatever.” I say and she just finally gives up the fight, but I knew I’d probably be up all night with my thoughts and half-assed writing.

“Whatever, just walk faster before I jump.”

—

The pain of my words hit a little harder around 1 am, I couldn’t believe I was even saying half of the shit that I did.

I wouldn’t even know how to react if she would’ve said the words I said to her, let alone know that she thinks I don’t love her or care about her. That’s what hurts the worst, is knowing she expects better but I just haven’t been up to her standards.

“You can’t stay up sulking all night, it’s bad for you.” Her voice cut through the dark music room.

“Can you see sulking in the dark or is it just obvious?” I ask and she chuckles, turning the light on in the room.

Her eyes were puffy and her frame curled inwards for warmth. She moved to sit on the edge of the plastic chair by the door. It stayed silent for at least three minutes.

“I don’t hate you, Shawn. I really don’t. I wish I did though, so every time you left for a new radio tour, press conference, or plain tour, it wouldn’t be so hard on me. So hard on me to watch you leave so effortlessly, as I sit here waiting for you to love me just as much. I’m not saying that you choose between the two because you don’t, I wouldn’t let you anyways. It’s just that,-“ she took a really deep breath in, her voice started to waver slightly,

“It’s just that I can tell you’re about to break. Every day I see you look more stressed out and I can’t help you. You don’t speak but a few words to me, so I know I can’t help you. And I know we both say stupid things when it’s a heated argument, but you were right. Maybe you’re better off alone because I can’t catch you and when I do, I’m no good.”

That was it, the tears started to fall down my cheeks rapidly. I knew I hurt her, but goddamn Shawn, you broke her.

“No one in this world knows me better than you do, inside and out. I’m sorry that I make it hard to love me, I build walls up to ensure I don’t break down and I built those walls without you inside them. I’m sorry. There’s no way I could be alone, I couldn’t do it without you. I just need time, I know it’s all you’ve been giving me, but I promise there is a change coming soon. I know we’re mad and on a tightrope, but you know me. Please, I’ll always need you; you know the real me is a weak mess inside.” I let the words flow out of my mouth as fast as the tears fell.

“You need time?” She asks and I nod, I could tell her heart was still just as broken.

“Not away or solely with you, I’m still making progress with my anxiety, and even if it’s hard to admit; I need more help. I’ve got to talk to the team and make changes to my mental health for once. I know waiting is hard and if you can’t do it, I understand, but baby no one has loved me as you do, and the same from me to you. So baby please, give me just a little time .” I felt like I was coming off as some desperate kid, but her face softened so gently, she waltzed to kneel in front of me.

“Okay, time it is.” She kissed my hand softly, the easiest and most loving gesture I needed. And for a second, I felt safe again. No one understood me like her.

​

[makingbeutifullookugly]

Taking care of you

AN: Hello everybody. This my first imagine on here and my first ever imagine on tumblr. I know it’s a bit short and not my best work, but I just wanted to put out something cute and short to start off this blog :) hope you enjoy it. 

Waking up in your boyfriends bed is the best thing ever, his view was amazing but your boyfriend was the most perfect human ever. And waking up to him laying next to you shirtless was always the most perfect thing to wake up to, most of the time you’d be naked as well.

But that’s the only thing that was the same this morning. You turned on your back feeling every bone and every muscle in your body hurt.  Your head was even worst and not to mention the shivers.

I turned on my back and shied shit, just great. It’s the first week that I don’t have to study for school after almost a month, and Shawn has just gotten back from tour and a few other performances, and just after two days with him – actually one night together – I get sick. Great. I moved on my side and rested my head on Shawn’s chest. Just as I put my hand on his stomach he moved and did a cute mini stretch. “Good morning hon” he said smiling with his eyes shut, his hand moving on my back. “Morning babe” I tried to say but was rudely interrupted by a cough.

 “You feeling ok?-” his hand was now on my forehead “babe, you’ve got a fever” he sighed “It’s ok, I’m fine. I’m just gonna take an Advil and I’ll be fine.” I rubbed my hand up and down his chest. “Yeah, right. I’m giving you my hoodie and sweats so you’ll be warm while I run out and get you some coffee or tea or hot choc. What would you like?” He said quickly getting up from the bed already putting on sweats. “I’m fine baby just stay right here, you don’t have to get me anything.” I reassured him. “What do you want?” he repeated, knowing I’m going to lose this fight and probably make Shawn annoyed I sighed “tea, please” he smiled and threw mi his pink hoodie and a pair of pajama bottoms and leaned on the bed. Puckering his lips for a kiss “no, I don’t wanna get you sick” I said moving my head to the opposite side. “You’re fine, eh?” he mocked me, “just go” I said moving my hand to push him away.

“Besides, after last night I’m a 100 percent sure that I got sick too.” He smirked and left out of the bedroom. I blushed and quickly put on sweats and pajama pants.

 When Shawn got back I was watching some YouTube videos and warming up under my duvet. “Hey honey, I’m back. I got you some tea and some Advil from the pharmacy.” He said and put everything on the night stand. “Thank you babe, you didn’t have to do this but I really appreciated.” I sat myself up on the bed and took out an Advil and gulped it down with some water that was sitting on Shawn’s nightstand.

 He was taking off his jacket and shirt, leaving him in just his sweats. “Why are you stripping?” I chuckled “ To come and cuddle you and because I’m hoping you’ll start to feel better if you look at me shirtless.” He smirked and made his was to bed. “Well that might actually be working” I smirked.

-

We stayed in bed most of the day watching movies – well Shawn was watching movies I was either asleep or staring at his perfect face. “I love you I hope you know that” Shawn whispered in my hair when a new episode of Friends started playing “I love you too, and I’m sorry for getting sick just on the couple of days that we have together” I said tilting my head up to look at him. “Honey, don’t apologize for that. I actually like that you got sick, we can spend our days in bed, cuddling. And what if you got sick when you had exams and stuff, that would be even worst. So stop apologizing for these type of things. Because I love taking care of you and I love you” Shawn said looking at me straight in my eyes. “I love you too.” I smiled and touched his cheek with my hand.

“Ah, fuck getting sick.” Shawn said as he placed his hand on my cheek and kissed my lips slowly. I smiled and wrapped my hands around his neck as he moved us around the bed so we were more comfortable.

The day was spend in bed, kissing and cuddling.

@flickershawn @ourboyshawn @gentlemanmendes @torontogawd @song-bird-shawn @getwaytooinvolved 

[shawnyimagines]

Sleeping

Just an idea 💕💖

I wish this wasn’t possible. I can not handle hearing everyone sob around me and yet I am stuck. Stuck in this box with lifeless limbs. It feels cold, like I am constantly under icy air. I feel like I am sleeping but yet I’m not, and I can hear everything around me. But funny enough I don’t remember going to sleep. Weird.

My mind is spinning, trying to think of all the possible reasons that people could be crying around me. Did something happen and I just don’t know yet?

My mind stops dry as I hear clicking sounds against the ground near me. “Sha... Shawn” the voice whimpers. Is that y/n? What is she doing here? I don’t remember scheduling anything that I could have missed. Before I can jump to any conclusions y/n speaks again.

“I know you promised me forever” she sniffs. “But maybe forever was just too long for us.”

Is she breaking up with me?

“I have no clue what to do without you. I’m lost. I miss you, and lately it feels like I can’t breathe without you here.”

What is she talking about? I’m right here.

“I scroll through all the photos of us and I just... we were so happy, you were so happy. I am begging you Shawn. Come back to me.” The sobbing starts again. “Your all I have.”

I’m right here.

“Just you and me.”

My heart aches for her and I don’t understand what’s going on. Why is she crying over me and why can’t I will myself to get up and fix it?

More footsteps approach and I wonder who they are. “Oh, y/n come here.” It’s my mothers voice. “Shawn would want you to move on, live a happy life.” My fathers voice.

“Just know that he died loving you.”

... What?

Thanks For reading I know it’s short but is just a small idea. Tell me what you think . Ily guys 💕

[livtries]

touring *part two*

Part One here

Summary - Shawn asked you to go on tour with him, and of course, you accepted, but also wanted to tell Shawn about your feelings for him.

Word Count - 635

A/N - Hope you liked part one, if your haven’t read it yet, I’ll link it again, here.

“Shawn, that’s not a question. Even if you told me I had to go, I’d not have a problem with it. You know I’ll support you with anything you do, including coming with my best friend on his tour.” You smile, looking at Shawn.

Shawn grins like you’ve never seen before. His cheeks flush.

“Is somebody embarrassed?” You question, his cheeks turning a darker shade of pink.

“Stahp it.” Shawn jokingly says.

You look at Shawn for a while, admiring his strong features, soft eyes, pink, plump lips.

“Shawn looks back at you, his expression growing worried.

“What? Why are you staring at me? Is there something on my face?” He questions, looking at you, breaking you out of your daze.

“Oh, nothing. No, you look… great. Like always.” You smirk, wondering if he’ll notice.

He blushes once again, realising what you said.

“y/n, can I ask you something?” Shawn says.

“Sure.” You say, looking back at him, much like you did before.

“Well, it’s not really a question, more like a confession.” Shawn says.

You just nod, waiting for Shawn to say what you’re thinking. ‘I love you’

“I’ve feelings for you.”Shawn says.

“Seriously?” You question. You’re completely shaken by the fact that Shawn had told you this. Never in a million years did you think Shawn felt the same way.

You looked at Shawn once again, wanting him to kiss you.

You decide to take it upon yourself and kiss him. You feel Shawn's hands wrap around your waist, pulling you in.

You and Shawn had so many good memories before you started dating, but everything just seemed to go uphill from there. Everything was going well, and you both couldn’t wait for tour.

Shawn was so giddy and happy to be traveling again. The first stop was in the Netherlands. You’d never been to the Netherlands before (a/n or maybe you have, idek) and you were so excited about it.

On the plane ride, you had napped most of the way, holding Shawn’s hand, and cuddling close to him. You’d not liked planes since you were a kid. There was just something about them that you didn’t like.

You arrived in the Netherlands. You felt a slightly nudge on your arm, waking up a few seconds later. You look around, stretching.

“We’re here.” Shawn says, grinning. You smile, yawning.

At the hotel, there were so many fans outside. You kind of felt bad… For Shawn, and them…

Shawn goes down, meeting the fans that were outside. Shawn finally comes back up to the hotel room, looking exhausted, stressed, and about to break. Shawn hugs you tighter than before.

He was so overtired and stressed. He starts crying because or all the stress.

“Shh, shh, shh.” You coo into his ear. “Everything’s gonna be okay baby.” You coo once more, he just nestles his head into you neck more, sniffling.

In the morning, you found yourself in the same position as last night. You nudged Shawn awake, seeing as it was almost 11.

“Shawn.” You whisper into his ear.

“Hmm?” He responds, lifting his head from where it once was, in the crook of your neck.

“It’s almost 11.” You say, looking at the clock.

“I’m never asleep this late.” He says, rolling off of you.

“I’m not either.” You say, smiling.

The concert was absolutely stunning, and magical. Everyone was so amazing.

After the concert, you’re all back on the road again.

*FINAL PART COMING LATER TODAY*

[1-800-sassy-mendes]

Surprise

Summary: A chill day with your son, he tells you his daddy is gonna surprise you and you think nothing of it at first.

a/n: so im back!! ive been vv busy if anyone was wondering. my macbook charger also got chewed up by my dog so no laptop, writjng has been very hard. i cant type on app because it crashes and this mobile browser SUCKS. so heres a writing butlike.. I wanted to write something for Jasmine but like I ended up really wanting to write Dad!Shawn. Bc I’m ready so ready, areyouready????? BTW I HAVE MOBILE PERMALINKS IN MY DESCRIPTION NOW IM SO EXCITED

masterlist / request / ask

“Mommy, suprise!” Your 2 year old yells out after giving you a kiss on the cheek when you picked him up to carry him. It sent you and Karen laughing. He has never said that before.

“Aaliyah taught him a new word.” Karen laughed and sat down on the couch. She brought Caden home on Saturday afternoon after his weekly Friday night sleep over at his Avó Karen and Vovô Manny’s. You and Shawn taught Caden how to say Grandpa and Grandma in Portuguese, which made your in-laws very happy. They watched him on the days you had to work. And on Fridays, Caden slept over at his Avó Karen and Vovô Manny’s. 

“How is she?” You ask, sitting beside her. This was a weekly Saturday afternoon thing for you and Karen, catching up with each other. Letting your son play with his toys on the carpet in front of the couch. Aaliyah decided to go to University of California in Berkeley. Very long ways from home, but she loved San Francisco, which was like thirty five minutes from her apartments. 

“She’s happy to be home,” Normally, you would always see Aaliyah every time she came home from California. But you have been busy with work and Caden that you haven’t gotten the chance to. “We hear rumors from her best friend that she’s got an American boyfriend.” 

That was Karen and Manny. All of Shawn and Aaliyah’s friends loves them. Even if Shawn or Aaliyah was halfway across the continent, or even the world, their friends always talked to them. Karen and Manny knows everything that is going on with their children’s friends, not hearing it from their children, but hearing it from the friends themselves that updates them. 

“Shawn’s gonna love that.” Emphasizing on love.

Karen laughs again, “I can already tell.”

Even if Aaliyah was already in her second year of College, Shawn still disliked the idea of her getting a boyfriend. When she bought her first boyfriend home, Shawn scared the poor boy off. In his defense, Aaliyah was only 17. But in her defense, you and Shawn were 17 when you started dating. Because of that, if the two of you had a baby girl, she would probably get married at sixty. 

“What did you do at Avó and Vovô’s yesterday?” You ask, standing near the floor to ceiling windows, drinking tea while your son was playing with his cars on the floor.

“Uhm,” He replied, not giving any less attention to his toys. “I saw Daddy.” He said in his cute little voice. It always amazes you how smart this kid is and how much words he says. Not thinking much of what he said, you figured that Shawn probably FaceTimed his parents. 

“Yeah, what did Daddy say?” You missed Shawn dearly while he was promoting his new album. Sooner or later, he’s gonna be gone for tour again. 

“I dunno,” Caden blurted his answer your question, he was too focused on his toy cars to care about your question.

“Daddy’s gonna come home soon, you know it?” You smile at your 2 year old. You knew he misses his Dad, but you knew he doesn’t have the concept of soon.

“Yes!” He yelled. “Daddy’s gonna come home latuh.” 

“No, Cadence,” Mentioning his full first name. Shawn wanted to name him something to do with music and you weren’t even sure what cadence means, you got lost when Shawn was explaining it to you. But you did like the name. “Not later. Soon though.”

Caden didn’t give you any attention after that, kids whenever they were distracted. You stared out the windows of the house that you and Shawn built after you got married. Both of you definitely wanted to start a family with kids in mind, and Shawn’s pretty condo in Downtown Toronto wasn’t the place you wanted to raise your kids in. It was obviously decided the house to be in Pickering, close to Downtown Toronto and both of your parents. It’s a gorgeous 5 bedroom house with a spacious kitchen, big backyard, a basement for Shawn’s ‘mancave’, and a lot more. You joke around about living the American dream in Canada a lot. 

“Mommy, surprise!” Caden yells and hands you his toy car. It was such a cute gesture that your heart melted.

“Oh, thank you, honey.” You messed with his curly waves that was just like Shawn’s. If he saw this, he would be so happy.

You missed Shawn dearly. He’s been gone for a month, going to different places every other day. A phone call at least once a day if he’s not busy. A FaceTime if he’s on the bus or in a hotel room. He still has a month left before the promo ends, then he’s going to tour soon after that. You and Caden are hopefully going on tour with him for a short time, your little boy isn’t really fond of traveling.

You missed Shawn so much you couldn’t help but talk to your son. “Caden, I miss your daddy. Do you?” 

“No,” Caden looks at you for a second and goes back to playing with his toys. He looks so much like Shawn, except Caden got your nose and face shape. You and Shawn knew he’s gonna be so good looking. 

“I see daddy yestuhdey.” You laugh at how he said yesterday, but in the back of your head, you thought that maybe Shawn is in town and Caden did see him. You shrugged the idea off since it was quite impossible. 

You stare out the window, watching the few cars pass by. You knew whose car each one of them were since they live in the neighborhood. You spot Aaliyah’s car and got excited as her car turned the curb to get to your house. You moved away from the windows to go to the kitchen to make Aaliyah coffee. As you walked past your son, you gave him a kiss on the forehead, telling him that his Auntie Liyah is here. 

You got the Keurig heating up when you heard the front door open and close shut. Your heart skipped a beat, being so excited to see your sister-in-law. You figured that she let herself in, which you don’t mind at all. It was just Aaliyah. 

 You were very surprised not to see Aaliyah standing in the living room, but found Shawn instead. He had Caden in his arms. He put Caden down once you were standing in front of each other. You couldn’t say anything aside from jump on him and give him a hug. Almost knocking him over because you caught him off guard. 

“Oh,” Shawn chuckled while he had you in his arms. He had been missing you and Caden a lot. Shawn had a week off all in all, due to something happening in the cities he was gonna go to. It was only a few hours plane ride to Toronto, he couldn’t help but go home. “I missed you too.” He put you down on the ground after a tight hug. 

“What? How are you here?” You watched him as he picked the now sleepy Caden up. Caden putting his head on his daddy’s shoulder. 

“I’ll explain later.” Shawn gives you that jaw dropping smile. You missed him so much.

Shawn whispered something into your son’s ear that you couldn’t hear, it made Caden lift his head and yelled, “Surprise, mommy!” Caden is like Shawn’s carbon copy. They both had this goofy smile on their faces. You figured out why Aaliyah taught your son the word. 

“You two are too cute. Come here, give mommy a kiss,” You smile at two of your favorite guys in the whole world. 

 Caden pouting his lips and leaning in to give you a sound and wet kiss. “Mwah,” he makes the noise every time he gives a kiss. It was too cute, you couldn’t help but giggle. 

Shawn leaned in to give you a quick smack. He wanted to kiss you longer, but your son was present. Caden was also impatient and sleepy, wanting his daddy to put him in bed for nap time. Shawn happily agreed to. 

 Once Shawn put your son in bed, it was time for the both of you. All cuddled up on the couch, John Mayer softly playing in the background, you guys caught up on everything that wasn’t mentioned in the calls. 

[shawnmeemes-blog]

lOok aT hIM

[thatjusthappned]

Going Up?

“Shawn Mendes is trapped in an elevator with what some would say is a crazed fan. Reports say she followed him in to get sometime alone. It’s been a total of 3 hours they’ve been stuck in the elevator. A hotel representative says they’re doing everything to get them out safely.” A News lady reports

                                              (in the elevator)

“Do you have a 7?” Shawn asks as we play go fish for the fifth time since we decided that talking about our lives was getting boring. “Go fish.” I say with a smirk, Shawn shakes his head as he blows air out his mouth which fills his cheeks. “I think you’re cheating and I don’t play with cheaters.” He picks up another card “Have you ever thought that you just suck at go fish?” Shawn glares at me “Do you have a 4?” Shawn sighs and throws the card at me “So cheating.” He mumbles under his breath. “What was that?” I asked with a laugh “Nothing, all I have to say is that you just so happen to have a deck of card in your bag and you’ve won every game we’ve played. Just sounds a little fishy, that’s all.” He says leaning back against the elevator wall. “Sounds like you just suck to me.” I said laughing hard holding the cards to my chest “It’s a game for 5 year old’s! How can I be bad at it.” Shawn says trying to sound mad, but fails with the smile that plays on his face. 

“ Hey Shawn and Y/N.” The Hotel manger says over the speaker “Sup?” We both respond looking up at the speaker. “So we’re still working on getting you guys out. For some reason we can’t get the elevator to move. Quite strange honestly, but soon we’ll be able to fix this don’t worry.” We nod “If there is an emergency you know what to do.” The manger says then disconnects from us. 

I look back over at Shawn he’s looking at his cards as his phone sits next to him and a text tone goes off that I’ve learned is his moms. Shawn checks it “My mom wants to know how you’re doing.” he looks at me “I’m good, let her know that I’m winning.”  he shacks his head a little and types something to her “I think we should do something else.” I say putting my cards down. Shawn gives me a weird look “It’s just not fun when I’m always winning.” I say leaning on the wall behind me, placing my arms behind my head for some kind of support and comfort. “What should be do now then?” Shawn asks, I shrug “You pick.” I close my eyes getting as comfortable as I possibly could. “I’m just gonna start asking you questions now.” I hum to indicate that was fine. 

“How old were you when you had you’re first kiss?” I opened my eyes then close them “10 years old, 6th grade, it was a zap.” he makes a noise “What is a ‘zap’?” Shawn asks “It was something kids in my school used to do. Someone writes something on the inside of your palm. Like a dare, you can’t look look at it, you can’t wash it off, and if you do look at it you have to do it.” I explain “I see, sound interesting. Do you wanna do a zap on each other?” Shawn asks, making me open my eyes then sit up crossing my legs again. “Um I’ll have to see if I have something to write with.” I say bring my bag closer to me “If you have cards in you bag and not a pen. Then that is just weird.” He mocks with sassy in his voice. I smile pulling out a marker and a pen. “Pick one.” I hold them out and he takes the marker. 

I pick the cards up and put them way. “So how are we doing this?” He asks moving closer to me. I also move closer, we’re both sitting crisscrossed with our knees together “Um.” I think to myself then looked up at him to answer but get distracted looking into his eyes. Now clearly this man is beautiful, but being this close it just a lot to take in. I was a fan of course but I always reminded myself that he’s human also and he deserves to be treated like one. It’s just that he’s an amazing human, which just so happened to make my crush on him that much worse than before he had no idea who I was. “Well, um. Give me your hand, I’ll write on it then you can write on mine.” He gives me his hand. Which is heavy and was some where in the middle of soft but manly. “Now look away.” I say looking him in the eyes again. “Right.” He turns his head. 

I think about what to write but nothing comes to mind. then something dose. So I write it. I blow on the ink to make sure it’s dry before closing his hand. “Okay now don’t look at it.” I say as he looks back at me. I let go of his heavy hand it’s like i was letting go of a five pound weight. “Which hand is not you dominant hand?” I hold it up he gently takes it. I’m scared to look away. “Turn you head little missy.” I do but he hasn’t started writing on my hand yet. It’s making me nervous, and want to peek. So I do. “Hey! That’s cheating.” Shawn says loudly then he turns his whole body around.Taking my arm with him and because of my arm length, my body and face gets pulled into his back. I let out a small moan of pain “Shit, sorry!” he says looking over his shoulder at me “You’re okay, just write.” I say back. I’m sitting very close to him, so close that I’m trying not to lean on him. He’s just taking too long and I’m getting tired. So I find myself leaning my head on his shoulder. “How did you come up with something? This is hard.” Shawn says “Just put anything you want.” I laugh “OH! I know.” He says “I’m gonna wipe your hand off on my chest it’s gotten sweaty.” he says as  he takes my hand by the wrist and places a finger on the back of my hand to keep it in place.

I swallow the spit that’s suddenly built up in my mouth. Then I feel the markers tip on my palm and I’m trying to figure out what he’s writing. Which doesn’t work, dammit I used to me so good at that. Shawn blows on my hand to make the ink dry, then closes my hand for me like I did for him. He turns to me and lets go of my hand slowly. I look up from our hands to him. He’s already looking at me with a smile. Not in a creepy way but a sweet way, this causes me to blush and move my body back to my “side’ of the elevator. He still has the smile on his face as he moves back also. “So what’s you’re favorite song that no body knows about.” He asks and I pull out my phone and place the hand with the zap on the cold floor so I don’t look at it. “This is.” I said starting to play it.

                              (4 hours, and 30 minutes later)

we’ve been trapped in the elevator for 8 hours, I’m basically falling asleep and I’m hungry and Shawn is also. “Hey so we’ve know how to get you out. Unfortunately It’s not the safest, but it’s kinda the only option at this point, but luckily you guys are only stuck in between the 2nd and 3rd floors it won’t be a far drop and you’ll be completely safe for the most part.” The manger says scaring me “FOR THE MOST PART? What the fuck do you mean?” I yell standing up yelling at the speaker “Hey Y/N calm down it’s okay.” Shawn says standing behind me placing his hands on my shoulders. Which does calm me down and I let out a loud sigh. I still have an annoyed look on my face. “What is this option?” Shawn asks his hand beginning to rub my arms to keep me calm I’m guessing. “Well we found out the cord to the elevator has somehow jammed and broke a little bit. We can’t pull you guys up throw the roof of it because it’s more than likely to brake. So we need to cut the cable so you guys can fall down and then we can get you out of there.” Wow i’m gonna die. I let my head fall back which hits Shawn’s chest. “Okay what do we have to do?” Shawn says still looking at the speaker. One of his hands smooths down my hair and I let him. I pick my head up and he’s now moved both hands to my hair now. “You guys need to lay down on the floor stay as still as possible. If you guess remain close you’ll be okay. So just cuddle up. We’re ready to cut the cord as soon as you guys are ready.” I begin to breath heavy and I turn to Shawn. 

“This can’t be the only way.” I’m freaking out he places his hands on my head to look at him. I look him in the eyes and he waits until my breathing isn’t as heavy as before. “We can do this. You’re going to be okay. I’m not going to let anything happen to you. Trust me.” I nodded at his words. “okay now lets lay down and you lay facing me and i’ll pull you close to me. Then we’ll be out in no time.” I nod. He lets me go and we both lay on our sides facing each other. Shawn pulls me closer like he said he would my face in his chest breathing in his smell. which is also calming. Hell everything about this boy is calming. “Are you ready?” He asks after a minute. I nod closing my eyes tight “We’re ready.” Shawn says loud. “See you soon.” Says the manger, Then in what seems like a matter of seconds we’re falling. 

——————————————————————

So let me know if I should do a second part to this, would love to do one. 

[brianc521]

There’s No Way

Him and his team think you’re playing hard to get. That you want to make them sweat a bit before you agree and extend your contract to open for the UK leg of the tour.

You’ve been with him for awhile now, touring, opening for him, becoming close with him.

This is what you did when they first asked you to be the opener, waited a little which is what lead to you getting your own bus and more merch being sold in the store. But this time around you aren’t playing hard to get. You’re waiting until your other contract is signed before you tell him.

You can’t do it anymore, you can’t be with this torture. He’s driving you insane, and it’s really starting to affect your personally.

It’s been this little cat and mouse game between the two of you. Shawn’s a big flirt, he’s a nervous flirt, but a big flirt. He’s been leaving you on the edge of your seat since you joined tour and as much as you hate it you love it.

“Hey pretty girl.” Shawn smirks, flopping on the couch, arm lazily draping over your shoulders.

You look over at him, heart rate picking up at his touch.

“What?” You sigh, looking down at your notebook.

“Andrew wanted me to ask how the reading of your new contract was coming?” He drops his chin to your shoulder, small puppy dog look in his hazelnut eyes.

“I’m not sure, haven’t spoken to my manager today.” You answer without looking at him.

“Are you okay?” He asks, fingers trailing over your arm, drawing little shapes.

“Yep.” You respond, not meaning to be so cold but not able to handle the heartbreak anymore.

“Y/n?” He whispered, brushing the hair off your shoulder. His soft breathing fanning your neck.

“Hmm?” You asked, eyes falling shut for a second, falling back into his trap.

“Are you upset with me?” He asks, and you look over into his sad eyes.

“No,” Your hollow voice responds.

“Then why haven’t I seen you this week, and when I have you won’t speak to me?” He asks, running his nose up and down your neck.

“Been busy,” You swallow thickly.

His phone buzzes and he sighs before pulling away. When he’s leaning forward, reading the email Andrew sent him you feel like you can finally breathe.

He’s intoxicating, and his simple touch makes everything around you melt away.

He huffs and you look over, letting your eyes trail over his figure and your eyes halt and widen at the purple bruise peeking out of his collar on the back of his neck. Your heart shatters, and you have to leave. You can’t sit next to him.

You stand, grabbing your notebook and purse ready to leave the green room.

“Hey, wait.” He looks over at your retreating figure.

“I have to go Shawn,” You wipe the small tear from the corner of your eye.

“No please, I want to talk to you.”

“No Shawn, I can’t do this anymore.”

He blanches, heart picking up in fear. “Do what?” He breathes out.

“Can’t sit here and talk to you about your soul, and what you think love is, and how you want to have your heart broken. Because it sucks Shawn, having your heart broken sucks and I don’t wish it on anyone and I especially don’t wish it on you.”

With that you rush out of the room, heading down to your bus and far away from him.

Shawn sits stunned, he gapes at where you were standing as his heart pounds loudly in his chest.

Jet lag is a bitch but it’s okay this time around, now that Shawn’s here to keep you company.

Over this last flight and round of shows you two started to get close, liking the fact that someone else your age is around and understands.

He’s so interesting, the way he sees things, hears things, thinks of things. It’s so interesting to get his point of view, because it opens your eyes to his world.

“So why do you want your heartbroken?” You ask softly, picking at the edge of the pillow you were leaning on.

“To write a killer album.” He chuckles, but you just stare at him, not believing that it’s his whole answer. He notices you stare and takes in a deep breath. “Because to be heartbroken is to be loved. Or to have been in love. I don’t think I have been, puppy love maybe. You know the high school stuff, but not actually in love. Not the raw, real, love you know?”

“Yeah I get that. But if I’m gonna fall in love, I’d rather not get heartbroken.”

“Yeah being heartbroken isn’t ideal, but I think I say that because I’d like to know that feeling of love. Like my fans love me, my family and friends love me, but I want to know what being IN love with someone is like.”

“Well whoever breaks your heart will feel the wrath of all of your fans.”

He giggles, shaking his head making his curls flop before settling.

“I think it’ll age my soul,” He tosses his guitar pick up in the air, catching it and doing it again.

He sits and lets your past conversations run through his head before Andrew was bounding in the room, taking him off to sound check.

**

It’s the night of the last show, and Shawn’s been trying to have a moment of your time all day. He wants to talk, he wants to ask you questions, he wants answers.

“Y/n,” He calls when he spots you down the hall with a stagehand, conversing about a guitar change in your set.

You turn and look at him at him over your shoulder and panic a bit. He’s jogging towards you and when he makes it to you you have nowhere to go anymore.

“I need to steal her for a second.” He speaks from behind you.

“Of course, have a good show.” The stagehand bids to you both and returning back his work.

“What’s up Shawn?”

“I want to talk about what you said a few days ago.” He said pulling you into his dressing room.

“Okay, but I don’t have much time.”

“That’s bullshit and we both know it. You’re free till the show, I even checked with your manager. Ran into him before his meeting with Andrew and found out you’ve been free all day, but told me you were busy.”

You sigh, shaking your head.

“Y/n, why have you been so weird lately?” He asks before his phone goes off, Andrew’s name flashing across the screen. “Give me a minute,” He says holding his hand up at you while he answers his phone. “No going anywhere like last time.”

“I’m busy,” He says as he answers.

You can’t hear Andrew, but you do know what that meeting was about so you know what this call was. Shawn’s eyes go wide, snapping to you as his mouth drops and face pales.

“This is a joke,” He mumbles and you wince at the sound of his voice. “Y/n?” He says as you look away. “Y/n!” His voice grows louder.

“I’m sorry,” You whisper, wanting to curl in on yourself.

“What do you mean you aren’t extending? Why? Why not? What?” He’s stuttering, mainly because he doesn’t understand. “That means that tonight's-,”

“Tonight's my last show.” You nod softly.

“No!” He shakes his head. “No, wait let’s talk about this.”

By now he’s hung up on Andrew and he’s a pleading man in front of you.

“There is nothing to talk about Shawn,”

“Yes there is!”

“What? What is there to say?”

“You could start with why?” He laughs desperately.

“Because I have feelings for you Shawn,” You snap at him. “I have feelings for you and I can’t work with you and be with you all the time knowing you don’t feel the same. It’s torture, it is constant torture.”

“How do you know I don’t feel the same?” His brows furrow.

“Because since the day I met you I haven’t been able to get you off my mind, I can not even think of seeing someone else because they aren’t you.” You sigh, taking a seat making him follow. “And for awhile I wondered if you felt the same.”

“But you don’t anymore?” He asks softly.

“No I don’t.” You shake your head. “When we started tour you flirted all the time, and we had these little moments. Backstage after shows, after a circle with the bands we’d have little moments where you’d lean and I’d lean in, but then one of your girls would come skipping in and poof, our moment was gone.” You wipe your eye. “That’s how I know you don’t feel the same. Because if you did feel the same you wouldn’t be having hookups, you wouldn’t come walking by with hickeys on your neck, or have girls come backstage, into our safe zone from the strangers around us.”

He’s at a loss for words. And is trying to form his thoughts but is struggling because he can see how hurt you are, and how he’s the one who’s done that damage.

“I do have feelings for you,” He mumbles.

“There’s no way this is gonna work,” You shake your head. “Even if the feelings are mutual, you aren’t ready for this the way I am.”

“Yes I am,” He defends.

“Then why did you go out with that blonde last night, and why are you talking with models, and why are you sneaking girls in and out of your room when we’re at hotels?” You demand, he looks away. “If you say it was to make me jealous that just proves my point, because this isn’t high school Shawn. This isn’t a drama show, and you’re pure and soft, yes. But you say it yourself, your songs are your truth. We both know you live it.”

He sighs, shaking his head. “You can’t tell me that just because I’ve been with other girls that we can’t be together.” He pouts.

“We can’t count out the future, because we don’t know what’s to come. But I can count out right now, because right now you’ve broken my heart.”

He deflates, shoulders slumping and lips frowning.

“I’ve what?” He shakes out.

“I’ve had my heart broken by the biggest heart throb, and oh my god it hurts. It hurts to see you happy and it hurts so much when you walk in all put together going ‘Hey pretty girl’.”

His breathing has picked up, because now with the way you are speaking it’s making him scared that you are really leaving.

“Can we work on this? Just give me some time to fix this, to help put your heart back together.”

“I don’t have time,” You stand, wiping off your jeans.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean that I’m going on tour with someone else, I leave in a week.”

His heart stops. “You’re really leaving?”

“I’m sorry, but I need to take some time for myself. I need to rebuild myself.”

He’s tugging at his curls, shaking his head as his eyes get watery.

“Shawn,” You touch his arm, grabbing his attention. “Right now, there’s no way.”

He nods, bottom lip trapped between his teeth.

“There’s just no way it would work, we aren’t ready. We may be meant to be, but we aren’t ready right now. You have life you want to live, so do I. And as much as I’d like to live it with you, it won’t be healthy. We’ll end up hating and resenting each other and I don’t want to lose you.”

He looks confused, “I don’t want to lose you either, but you’re leaving, so I already am.”

“No,” You shake your head. “I’m not extending, I’m still working but with a different team. But you aren’t losing me. I might be gone for awhile, but I’d like to know that if I needed you you’d be there.”

“I would be.” He nods quickly.

“So will I.” You agree.

“So,” He looks at you. “Not right now, but in the future?” He makes sure he’s understanding.

“Exactly.”

[imfreefallinall]

A Love Affair (Valet Shawn Imagine)

Hello everyone, Happy 2019!

This time, I am taking you back to the 1800s, when (and where) Queen Victoria ruler her kingdom like a badass. I am so in love with the tv series that I have decided to write an imagine inspired by it. English is not my first language, therefore writing like a kid in the 19th century was quite difficult, BUT I made my research and it turned out pretty well. Most of my characters existed in the past- well, Shawn didn’t of course.

I am back with a new imagine which could turn into a mini-series or it could have a spin-off. If you want this to happen, please remember that feedback is always appreciated!

I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I loved writing it.

5,1k words

Love, B.

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London, March 1840.

(Jane’s POV)

“Lady Jane, niece of the Duchess of Buccleuch, Your Majesty.” I said, bowing in front of the Queen. My first day at Buckingham Palace.

“Duchess, Lady Jane, I am delighted by your presence at court. I believe I will enjoy your company very much. You have our permission to accommodate in your apartments, we will meet at 40 minutes after 14 hours for my daily walk in the park." Queen Victoria replied, smiling kindly at me while I lifted my head again, holding my hands tight together to make them stop shaking.  I excused myself and exited the Throne Room with my old aunt, never turning my back to the Royal Family as Mama taught me when I was little. I followed my aunt into our apartments, mesmerized by the golden greatness of the palace and its hallways. Shining, crystal chandeliers hanging from the decorated ceilings, large paintings adorning the walls.

”You need to straighten your back while you bow, Jane.”  the Duchess scolded, giving me a quite disappointed look.

“I’m sorry, ma’am. I will practise as soon as my engagements will permit me to.” I answered, eyes looking at the floor. I hoped the Queen did not notice my lack of composure.

“Not today then. You heard Her Majesty, you better hurry and change your attire. We need to be ready to follow the Queen in all of her appointments when she requires our company. Do not forget to prepare your watercolours and your paint brushes. It is good use to gift Her Majesty with a painting to show her your abilities. God knows if she will find you useful.” she told me with her usual cold tone. I nodded in silence and excused myself, moving to the other room to change my dress and shoes into something more comfortable than the ceremony dress I wore to meet Her Majesty Queen Victoria and His Royal Highness Prince Albert. A little knock on the door caught my attention while I was selecting the best brushes of my collection. I opened the door slowly, ready to bow at whoever was in front of me.

“Jane, you must not open the doors by yourself. We have the guards for this reason.” the Duchess exclaimed from the nearest room. That old woman had eyes everywhere.

“I am sorry, ma’am. It will not happen again.” I confirmed, sighting a little before turning my head to the door. A handsome, tall man was standing uncomfortably in front of me. He was wearing simple, cotton clothes and his hair, although had been visibly brushed to give them some order, were messy on his head. He smiled kindly, plump limps adorning his face that had now turned bright, embarrassed red. He was carrying a golden tray, a letter laying on it.

“Correspondence for the Duchess of Buccleuch, ma’am.” he exclaimed, extending the tray in my direction. I admired his smile, flattering my eyelashes fast to come back to my senses once I realized I was staring too long.

“Thank you, I will consign it to her.” I smiled, taking the golden paper in my gloved hands. The boy bowed his head a little, retiring himself and walking down the hallway. I could have sworn he was muttering to himself.

“Give it to me, Jane! I am not too old to open a letter by myself.” the Duchess said, taking the envelope from my hands and sitting in her armchair.

“Go, do something, Jane. I am sure you will find something else to do instead of standing there, looking at me.” she added and I nodded, dismissing myself and walking out of our apartment.

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Buckingham Palace, Summer 1840.

“The Queen is pregnant, Jane, so you must practise your musical skills in order to delight her whenever she requests it. In her conditions, she will not have many engagements and you must amuse her during her period of rest.” the Duchess ordered and I assented, accepting for the thousandth time a new order.

“Yes, ma’am. I will be in the Green Room, exercising myself at the piano.” I bowed at her and walked down the stairs, losing myself in those infinities, golden hallways.

“It seems to me that you might be in need of help, My Lady.” a masculine voice said behind me. I turned and curtsey at the blonde, good-looking man dressed up in a classic English red and white uniform.

“Yes, Sir. I was searching for the Green Room to play the piano but I must have lost my path. “ I answered, intertwining my hands in front of me and straightening my back, the corset digging in the soft form of my hips and obliging me to stay rigid.

“I will be honoured to walk you to your destination. I believe I have not had the pleasure to make your acquaintance before. I am Lord Alfred Henry Paget.” he said, lifting his hat with his right hand while walking by my side.

“Lady Jane, niece of the Duchess of Buccleuch, My Lord.” I replied, reverencing again. If I was obliged to introduce myself once more in this way, I would be sickening straight away. Fortunately, we walked in silence down various hallways.

“I believe you are very talented in the matter of music. I would like to hear your favourite piece, Lady Jane.” he proclaimed entering the Green Room.

“It would be a pleasure to me, Lord Alfred.” I replied, sitting in front of the instrument with my handwritten score in front of my eyes. I played for what felt like hours, waiting for Lord Alfred to excuse himself in order to let me finish but he seemed too delighted to acknowledge my tiredness so I had to keep playing and playing until a knock on the open door gave me the perfect excuse to rest my hands.

“Please, do not stop playing, Lady Jane. Your music is nectar to my ears. “ the Lord said, requiring me to start again.

“Pardon Sir, I would never interrupt your activities but I have correspondence for you, Lord Alfred.” the same servant I met multiple times during my stay here spoke vehemently but politely. I turned slightly my gaze to look at him, my hands dancing expertly on the keyboard.

"You are my favourite page boy for a reason, Shawn. You can go now.” the Lord replied and I repressed a surprised smile. The boy, Shawn, curved his head down and exited the room.

"I would like you to sit with me, Lady Jane. I believe your hands feel heavy after such an impeccable performance.” added Lord Alfred after he read the letter, making me almost sighting in relief. I sit on the bench in front of his chair, hands in my lap.

"May I say that I have never heard a respectable man like you call a servant by his name, Lord Alfred.” I questioned politely, looking at the man sitting with the letter now opened in front of him.

"I recognise you are right, Lady Jane, it might result inappropriate but Shawn and I grew up in different parts of the same house. It was not unusual for my kid self to play with him. I believe he is as respectable as me when it comes to names and not noble titles, My Lady. " he answered calmly, making me smile a little.

"I find it very kind of the Queen to permit you to take your servants here at Palace. " I replied while he nodded.

"Being Chief Equerry and Clerk Marshal of the Queen has its privileges, beyond its duties, My Lady. In fact, I must excuse myself but I must go to solve some of my obligations. Hearing you play was a pleasure, I do hope I will be able to do it again soon.” he exclaimed, almost happily, while we both stood to greet each other.

"It was an honour, Lord Alfred.” I smiled politely, bowing after he kissed my right hand.

"If you happen to get lost again, please ask me or Shawn for help. I would never want you to miss your engagements because you could not find the right way, Lady Jane.” I giggled a little, nodding slowly.

"You have my word, Lord Alfred.” I agreed and he smiled one last time before wearing his hat on his head again and walking out of the small salon. He was a respectable man and a tempting marriage prospect, indeed, but he could not make my heart race in the same ways as his valet.

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Anglesey, Irish Sea, January 1839

(Shawn’s POV)

"Shawn, my reliable friend, I have a great tiding for you! I have been chosen to be the Queen’s Chief Equerry and Clerk Marshal. We are moving to Buckingham Palace, dear friend! Please, guarantee that all my essentials are packed before Saturday at 13 hours.” my master, Lord Alfred, ordered kindly. I nodded and bowed my head.

"I am pleasantly happy but not surprised for your achievement, Sir. I will personally pack your chest with all the things that are necessary.” I obeyed, making my way into the Master’s estate to prepare all the items of baggage.

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Buckingham Palace, March 1840.

"Everyone, listen! Today the new Ladies-in-waiting of the Queen will arrive. The Queen will host a luncheon and you will all be expected to greet them with their noble title or calling them Lady. Everyone will be needed today, so forget about your normal role because you will be demanded to do whatever will be necessary, including serving someone who isn’t your master. All clear? Now, go and do your work.” Mister Penge, the servants’ supervisor, explained with his usual harshness what were our daily tasks. Clearly, being Lord Alfred’s page did not exonerate me from normal tasks. Soon, I was asked to deliver envelopes all over the Palace, ending right in the wing reserved to the Queen’s Ladies. I knocked at the white and gold door, the Royal Guards looking at me dubiously. A young, beautiful girl opened the door, a smooth move like she was used to doing it every day. I doubted she was.

"Correspondence for the Duchess of Buccleuch, ma’am.” I spoke kindly, my cheeks immediately burning red because of her eyes scanning my clearly not noble attire. I took advantage of her distraction to admire the way her dress hugged her small frame perfectly. It was rather simple to be worn by a Lady like her: blue and long, without any particular pattern but pearled lace adorning her round, full chest and her slim waist. Then I looked at her round, natural rosy face: blue eyes shining, matching the Royal environment surrounding us, and blonde, curly hair framing her cheeks softly, leaving her pierced ears free to make those big, celestial blue earrings reflect the pale light of the sun.

"Thank you, I will consign it to her.” she smiled, locking my eyes with hers while her delicate hands, covered with matching blue gloves,  took the letter from the tray. I nodded, bowed and made my way back into the servant’s floor, scolding myself for being too insolent while looking at her. She is a Lady and, therefore, not someone made for me.

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Buckingham Palace, November 1840.

"Shawn, please, deliver this letter to Lady Jane. I believe I saw her walking in the garden after she left Her Majesty’s apartments. I am surprised her aunt, the Duchess, left her alone so please, hurry. I would really like to meet her soon. I give you custody of this letter.” Lord Alfred issued me with this duty and I nodded immediately, placing the letter on the golden tray and walking out of the Palace. The air was cold but fresh, the sky was promising white snow. I walked for a few minutes before finding Lady Jane sitting on a marble bench, her wooden easel in front of her and two palettes of watercolours placed on the table at her right. A thin brush placed in her left hand, lifted in the air and moving suavely to imitate the forms of the white flowers blossomed in the garden in front of her.

"I am sorry to interfere in your activities, ma’am, but I have a letter for you from Lord Alfred.” I announced, moving to be in her sight. She started a little on her seat, brush falling from her hold. I knelt to the ground, taking the tool in my bigger hands and offering it to her with the letter.

"Thank you, you can put the letter on the table.” she answered weakly, her usual warm smile long forgotten. I assented, placing the envelope far from the big cup full of coloured water to preserve it from being soaked. I bowed and started to walk away, before turning again.

"I would not want to sound unkind, but I believe it is getting cold outside and your dress does not seem warm enough.” I said hesitantly.

"I believe you are right, indeed, but going in my apartments would mean meet my aunt and I would rather not right now. Thank you for your carefulness.” she replied, smiling faintly. I nodded again and bowed, starting to walk away once more. I could not leave her like that, though. I might not own a title but I am a gentleman, still. I turned again.

"I am afraid I have no right to offer this but, since I have no right to enter your apartments, ma’am, I could take you my coat to fight the cold? Or I could ask Lord Alfred and take you one of his warmer coats, I am sure it would be much more appropriate.” I spoke again and this time she turned to face me.

"I would like to be left alone, please, so do not call Lord Alfred.” she answered, turning back to draw a harsh line on her canvas. I sighted, ready to recite my excuses, but she interrupted me.

"I would also like to wear your coat, please. I do not want to pass a cold to our very pregnant Queen.” she added and I smiled, relieved, running in my dormitory and going back to her. I placed my only coat, one gifted to me by my old father before my departure to Buckingham Palace, on her small shoulders. She smiled, placing her hands on mine to adjust the cloth.

"Thank you so much. Would you mind moving those flowers for me? " she asked kindly, almost giving me the chance to say no.

"Yes, ma’am. Guide me.” I replied, making my way to the small flowerbed. I started to move the flowers as her wish, making myself comfortable between them.

"This is perfect, please, hold them in this way for a little bit longer.” she commanded, sounding more like a girl and less like a lady. Sitting there, in the humid grass, I wondered how old was her, if she was happy about being at court or if she was happy in general. On any other day, if someone asked me, I would have said that she was, indeed, happy. But that day, maybe for the usual, grey sky of London, or maybe for the way a lock of her hair fell from her unkempt hairstyle, I would have answered that being a Lady was an attire too tight for her to wear.

"Please, Shawn, talk to me. Some company would make me work faster.” she spoke, her face hidden by the canvas she was working on.

"I am 22 years old and I grew up in Lord Alfred’s dad’s estate. My mother was a seamstress and my dad a squire but I was raised to be everything Lord Alfred wanted me to be: a friend, a rival in a fencing match or a musician. I am grateful because I got the chance to listen to Lord Alfred repeat his lectures or exercise his skills and, in this way, I learnt to write, to read and some science and astronomy too. Being able to read gave me the opportunity to admire the world’s greatest poems like the Odyssey or Shakespeare’s plays. Personally, my favourite is Macbeth, not only for the history it tells but mostly because of the teaching it shares with us: always choose honesty before power. And I do follow this example even if, in my opinion, a man who lived in the 17th century could have been more kind to the poor, crazy Lady Macbeth. I also like music, in fact, I can play the piano and some instruments with strings. I really enjoy looking at paintings and I know many famous artists but, unfortunately, my hands are not as delicate as yours: I would make a horrible painting if my hands were allowed to touch, even lightly, a brush.” I spoke, hearing her soft giggles coming from the seat she was sat on.

"Such a curious man you are. Please, come here. I would really like your opinion on my painting.” she said, placing the brush in the cup and standing up. I walked forward, brushing my hands on my trousers to take off the humid terrain. I stood behind her, my big frame hovering over her, allowing me to see her canvas. It represented the garden, with those white flowers that lasted all winter and that she seemed to love. The harsh line she angrily painted before was now moulded to resemble a cloud in the sky. I then recognize my figure, almost laid in that carpet of flowers that looked like snow. She did not paint my face, just some light strokes to resemble my lips, nose, eyes and eyebrows.

"Wow...this is...not what I expected, to be honest, but it is a real masterpiece. I believe your hand has a magic touch on this canvas.” I congratulated her, still mesmerized by her talent.

"I hope you do not mind, Shawn, but everything seemed too grey and sad before you came here with your charming, warm smile. I thought I needed to bring the same warmness into my painting, in order to balance the cloudy sky I see every day from this golden prison.” she answered, turning to look at me. I lowered my chin a bit, our eyes intertwined once more while I admired the smile that was gracing on her fine lips.

"I am honoured, Lady Jane.” I said, looking back to the painting. She was too beautiful.

"Just Jane for you, I beg." she whispered, surprising me with her request. I smiled and nodded, looking back at her and allowing myself to get lost in her beauty once more.

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(Jane’s POV)

"Her Majesty, The Queen of England and His Royal Highness Prince Albert are delighted to announce the Servants’ Christmas Ball in honour of the newborn Princess Victoria. It will take place this Saturday, the 23rd of December in the basement. " The servants’ supervisor announced. A small smile appeared on my face, my gaze running around the Throne Room and laying on Shawn’s excited face. Our meetings became more frequent: it could be in the gardens, when he delivered letters and spent more time than necessary by my side as I tried to teach him the French technique to use watercolours, or I could play the piano for hours, waiting for him to casually walk by and play with me, hoping no one saw us. We smiled for a few seconds at each other, then I turned to look at the Queen, sat on the throne, happiness and relief surrounding her. She was made for being a Queen. The pregnancy had made her uncomfortable and she felt useless; now she was ready to reign over her kingdom again and what better than a ball to celebrate? She loved balls. I loved balls too.

Returned to our apartments, I dismissed myself from the Duchess and I sat at the small glass table, brush in my hand as I started to draw the dress I would have loved to wear at the party. I was expected to wear the dress the Duchess would have found more suitable for me, but I would have loved to wear a rather simple dress, without all of the elaborated patterns and diamonds. Maybe a plain green dress with a little fine lace on the hem and my favourite pin, the last gift my mom left for me: a pin with an emerald and some small pearls. I hope Shawn would have liked me better in a simple dress. Maybe, if I asked nicely, I could have gotten the dressed I was more pleased to wear.

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(Shawn’s POV)

"Shawn, I believe your ceremony suit does not fit you well enough to be seen by Her Majesty. So I asked my tailor to create a new costume for you, I believe we have the same size. And certainly, I would never want people to deem I do not treat my servants, once in a while.” Lord Alfred declared, handing me the suit.

"Thank you, Sir. I am very grateful for this.” I replied, taking the soft cloth in my hands. I hoped Jane would have found me classy enough to share a dance with me.

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Buckingham Palace, the 23rd of December.

I was thrilled. The basement was decorated with green plants and good perfumes, a small Christmas tree in the corner with small candles to lit it up. I shaved and cleaned as much as I could, trying to be the best version I could be to deserve the company of Jane. I wore the suit, which probably cost as much as three years of my salary, and I was surprised it fitted so good on me. I looked almost...noble.

20 minutes after 19 hours, the trumpets started to play and we all lined up to greet the Queen. She was absolutely gorgeous, indeed, but the woman walking three steps behind her was breathtaking. Jane was wearing a long, green velvet dress, tight around her chest and loose around her hips. A small pin in the middle of the neckline and her hair tied up in a low bun made of a braid, the same white flowers she loved perfectly arranged between her locks.

"Maestro, please.” the Queen said, motioning to the small orchestra. The Head Master took her in his arms as they lead the dance, servants and noble joining them soon after. I walked slowly to the other side of the small living room, standing beside Lord Alfred and Lady Jane.

"Lady Jane, may I have this dance?” Lord Alfred said after a while, offering his hand to the lovely woman near him. She seemed uncomfortable, the Duchess her aunt whispering in her ear, clearly trying to convince her to accept. She was almost nodding, lifting her hand to lay it in my master’s.

"I believe, Sir, this ball is meant to intertwine servants and nobles. It would not be a good image if two nobles danced with each other. I am sure Miss Skerret would be pleased to dance with you, Lord Alfred.” Mister Penge exclaimed, showing my friend Nancy to my master. He nodded, not pleased but not angry, taking Miss Skerret’s hand and going into the dance floor. Mister Penge looked at me slightly, nodding a little in Jane’s direction and walking away to dance with the Queen. I smiled, turning to face Jane.

"Lady Jane, may I lead you to the dance floor?" I asked kindly, stretching my hand for her to take it.

"I would be honoured.” she smiled, placing her soft hand in mine with no hesitation. I squeezed it softly, leading her where the others were dancing and we started waving together, her hand on my shoulder and mine leaned delicately on the upper part of her back.

"I have reason to believe your aunt was not delighted by this ball, My Lady.” I spoke softly, looking at her shining blue eyes. She giggled, hand holding mine a little bit tighter.

"I am sure you are not mistaken, she has not stopped showing her disappointment since the ball was announced. I find it almost disrespectful, it is something the Queen really looked forward too.” She reasoned, her feet guiding mine during the Walzer we were dancing to.

"Was she? I hope she was not the only one.” I replied, distancing myself from her warm body just enough to let her twirl a few seconds, welcoming her back in my arms soon after.

"Indeed, she was not. The whole court is reunited here, tonight. I find this amusing and a good event to lighten everyone’s state of mind.” She laughed, twirling again and ending closer to my chest. We danced for a few minutes, switching partners for the next five dances before I had the chance to address her again.

"Would it be inappropriate if I admitted I missed all of you?” I whispered softly, my hand moving slightly on her back. I knew the corset was probably hurting her, her shoulders tensed and her movements not as smooth as when we danced once, in the dark of the night.

"It would not if I admitted I missed all of you too, certainly.” She smiled, her eyes looking lovely in the Christmas light.

"I wish we could be closer, just like we were when you were getting my horse ready.” She added, her face getting close to my shoulder. I sighed, memories of the time we passed as normal young persons full-filling my head.

"I wish, indeed, but I am afraid this will be the closest we will get to be tonight.”  I replied, my fingers intertwined with her in a desperate attempt to satisfy the need of caress her cheek.

"Maybe I could forget my gloves on the wooden chair I see in the corner, and you would be expected to bring them to me.” Jane suggested, her warm breath caressing my neck, making me shiver.

"It would be a shame, ma’am, if you did not have the chance to wear this morbid gloves again.” I agreed, my thumb brushed softly against the uncovered skin in the middle of her shoulder blades. We stayed silent for the rest of the night, gifting each other with hidden smiles. When the Queen retired, her Ladies-In-Waiting and the rest of the nobles followed her. I stayed with my equals, cleaning until I noticed her small, light green gloves methodically placed on the chair’s seatback. I put them in the pocket of my jacket, breaking a smile as the perfume of my beloved Jane filled my senses. As I finished my duties, I climbed the stairs and patiently wait for Jane to arrive. When she did, she was wearing a dark coat on her nightgown. Her hair was no longer organized in a complicated way, only a simple hair comb to keep it from falling on her face.

"I am sorry to disturb you, ma’am, but I am afraid you may have forgotten your gloves downstairs, after the ball." I played my role, her small hand wrapping around my wrist and guiding me to a darker hallway.

“Thank you, Shawn. I would have not know what to do with myself if I did not get them back." She whispered, her hands brushing against mine to collect the gloves and placing them in her pocket.

"May I have the pleasure? One more dance with you.” I smiled, my arms embracing her tenderly.

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(Jane’s POV)

How could I resist his loving smile? I knew the Duchess was probably waiting for me, but forgetting for a few minutes of who I was and what I was supposed to do sounded too sweet to refuse. I placed my head in the crook of his neck, his warmness feeling familiar.

"You looked..exquisite tonight. But would you mind if I...?” he whispered, his hand coming up and wrapping around my hair comb, extracting it slowly to let my hair fall freely on my shoulders and neck.

"I love seeing you..unbounded. Less like a Lady, more like a beautiful, young woman.” Shawn explained, his fingers brushing sweetly against my cheekbone, moving my messy hair to reveal more naked skin. I smiled shyly as he started to hum a slow harmony, his head lowering to caress my neck and my cheekbones with the soft curve of his rosy lips. I closed my eyes, his fingers moving more hair behind my ears, his kisses coming to my cheek. I opened my eyes again, uncertain if I would enjoy more this moment blind or not, only to find his brown eyes already staring at me with a glimpse of hope and tenderness.

"My beloved Jane...I wish I could be the man for you, and we both know I am not. But for tonight, I want to forget and just be a boy in love with a girl.” he whispered, his breath warm on me. I smiled in disbelief.

“You love me?” I questioned, my hand lifting to twist the lonely curl who fell on his forehead around my small finger. He took my free, and for once naked, hand in his, kneeling to the ground and kissing it in a slightly way.

“How could I not, my angel? Your skin is like silk under my callous finger, giving them rest after a rough day. Your eyes are always so full of admiration when I speak about music and art, even if I am just a valet. Your hair, blonde as the grain of August and perfumed like the flowers you adore. And your lips, my love...” he said, standing back on his feet and taking my face in his hands “...your lips look just like my deepest desire, the one I try to hold back so fiercely.” he murmured, his nose stroking lovely against mine.

“Please, my dear...do not hold it back. You are my only wish.” I replied. He smiled brightly at my words, nodding before pressing his lips on mine. A slow, uncertain kiss at first and a passionate embrace then, his arms closing around me and mine tugging kindly at the hair at the base of his neck. The humid sound of our lips parting and reconnecting was the only one filling the air as his tongue tapped gently against my lower lip, begging to meet mine and to capture it in a dance as sweet as the one who concerned us before. As we parted one last time, the midnight bells ringing in distance, he pressed a kiss on my forehead guiding my hands to rest over his strong chest to feel the fast beat of his heart.

Masterlist

[shittyfandomimagines]

Little Family

Okay so like... I want to have Shawn’s babies.

Word count: 1,570

Fluff. Cute fluff.

Creds to GIF owner

I felt like one of those blowfish, I mean I literally think I am one. My pregnant belly was pushed so far out since I’m due in 6 weeks, I mean I literally am about to pop.

I loved that my body was carrying my baby girl, I mean I will never hate that I’m swelled up because of the human in my belly. It’s just that I’m tired, beyond tired really. I don’t want to walk down the stairs, put my shoes on, and I definitely didn’t want Shawn to do everything for me.

I love that man more than humanly possible, but he is too sweet to me. He wants me to call him every time I’m ready to get out of the bed so he can help me. He wants to fetch my shoes and make sure they’re perfectly put on my feet. He brings me food and takes care of our toddler Rylan, I just miss being able to do these things.

When I had Rylan three years ago, I understood why Shawn was acting like he is now; it was my first baby, neither of us knew what to expect from the pregnancy. Trust me, I love that man and I love that he is so caring, but I want to feel like me.

I want to hold Rylan without Shawn freaking out that his weight is going to hurt me. I miss being able to tie my shoes without Shawn, which is a weird request but it was just something I did. I wish I could just have a second where I felt like I wasn’t a burden or an experiment who needed to be watched.

I let a puff of air escape my mouth as I roll off of the bed, my feet achingly hitting the ground. I walk to our closet and pull out some of my maternity jeans and shirt, I grab my bra off the door handle to the closet.

I take them back to the bed and then I sit down, I take my pajama shorts off and replace them with the jeans. I had to lay on the bed to even pull them up my legs, I found myself giggling at what I had to look like from a different perspective. I take my tank top off and try to clasp my bra on.

“What are you doing?” Shawn frantically comes to the bed to help me. “I’m putting on clothes so we can go to the doctor's office,” I state and he rolls his eyes. “I know that, but you didn’t call my name to help you.” He says as he takes the shirt out of my hands. I didn’t even answer his statement. He situated it to where I just had to put my arms through, then I put my head through the hole.

I did say anything as he did so, but soon after we hear footsteps running into the room. “Mama!” Rylan came running to me, I reach my arms out to where he could jump into them. He gets into my arms and I dramatically fall back. “Ry Ry. Who is mamas baby boy?” I ask as I was tickling his sides as he was laughing loudly. “Me!” He was kissing all over my face, it felt good to have him in my arms.

“Rylan, you know what I told you about being rough around mama and your sister.” Shawn was pulling him off of me, I started to feel my annoyance building up with me. I started to see Rylan putting his head down sadly. “Why don’t you go pick out some clothes Ry, I will come to help you in a minute. Okay?” I ask and he nods, I kiss his cheek and he starts to run out of the room.

“I think you’re being too hard on him Shawn, he’s still my baby too.” I cross my arms and Shawn slacks his shoulder. “I know but you’re due so soon and I don’t want you hurting yourself. You need to put her first because she’s inside your beautiful little stomach.” Shawn squats down to put his hands on my stomach and I put my hands on top of his.

“Yeah and Rylan was once in there, he’s my baby boy and I need to make sure he knows I still love him. You’re the only one taking care of him and I want to be his parent too.” I say while standing up, I go back to the closet to look at the shoe rack, I pick out some gray tennis shoes and I find some socks in a drawer. Shawn was standing there watching over me, per usual.

“Well, you aren’t being careful.” He groans and I feel myself snap a little inside. “Shawn, I don’t have time to be careless. You watch over me and make sure I’m not doing something dangerous. I can’t hold Rylan, I don’t get to put on my clothes, and I have to be bedridden because you freak out over everything.” I huff out and I see his face fall.

“I just wanted to be a good husband and father. I’m sorry to burden you.” He says sadly and I feel all my guilt build up. I walk past him and sit on the bed again.

I lift my leg as high as I can so I could slip my sock on, I haven’t really done this in a while. I could hardly pull on the sock up my swollen feet.

Shawn drops himself on the ground in front of me again. He pulls the sock further up and then slides the shoe on. He ties it quickly and the repeats himself with my left foot. I run my hand through his curls and he looks up at me.

“I’m sorry that I made you feel like you lost your independence.” He says and his brown eyes were sad and I rub his cheekbones. “You know I really appreciate you Shawn and I’m sorry I let my hormones take over, I know you’re trying so hard and that I do need to be careful. I do appreciate you.” I smile softly and he smiles too, he gets on his knees to be at eye level.

“You know I would do anything to make sure my family is safe. I love you.” He kisses my cheek and I wrap my arms around the back of his neck to pull him closer. “I love you more.” I kiss his lips and he was grinning big. “You’re so cute when you go from mom-ster to my sweet wife.” He mumbles and I push him back. “You nicknamed me a mom-ster?” I ask and he nods. “You’re an asshole.”

“Mama! Dada! I dressed myself!” Rylan comes running into the room. Shawn looks back and I look over, his outfit almost made me laugh. His pants were on backward and his shirt didn’t really match. He did put his socks on, but his shoes were on the wrong feet.

“Baby, you did so well! Sit up here with mommy and let me get a closer look.” I pat the bed beside me and he comes running over, Shawn boosts him up.

“I’ll go get another shirt. Arms up!” Shawn kisses my cheek and then moves over to Rylan. He lifts his arms and takes the shirt off. He gives Rylan a few strawberries on his stomach and he was laughing loudly. Shawn starts to jog off towards his room.

“Rylan, your pants are on backward. Wanna let mommy show you the right way?” I ask and he nods, he jumps off the bed and takes his blue jeans off. I turn them the right way and he sticks his legs in. “Good job baby boy, now do you wanna fix your shoes?” I ask and he nods. “Yeah, they’re hurting me, mama.” He says and I put him beside me on the bed. “That’s okay, mama will fix it,” I say and rearrange his shoes.

“Mama! We have the same shoes!” He yells as he jumps back on the floor, he gets down to my feet and starts poking at them. “I think daddy has some just like ours too, maybe when he comes back you can convince him to change his shoes,” I whisper and he nods quickly.

When Shawn enters, Ry was running over to him. “Dada, can you change shoes? Mama and I are matching, you gotta match!” He was jumping up and down, Shawn picks him up. “Ask mama if you think I should.” He kindly demands and Rylan looks at me. “Mama can dada match?” He asks and I nod.

“Let’s get your shirt on buddy so dada can get his shoes on too,” I say as Shawn hands me the shirt and puts Rylan back down. He lifts his arms and I put the shirt on.

“See, we're all one big matching family. When sissy is born we can get her matching shoes too.” Shawn walks over and Rylan giggles. “She’ll look just like mama,” Rylan says and my heart felt so happy. Shawn looked over at me with an adoring smile, it looked like he almost had some tears in his eyes.

“Yeah bubba, we’ll have a baby girl that looks like mama. We’ll be a big, matching family.”

[shawnyimagines]

Stranger in the night

Hey Guys I know I sorta have been MIA for a bit but I’m getting back into the swing of writing so here we are , hope you like it. Plz comment your thoughts 💕 hope you all have a fabulous day/night.

It’s cold outside and I mentally hit myself for deciding to walk home in a short red dress with strapped heels on. It was girls night so I decided to dress up but all the girls were off with boys so I don’t have a ride home. The goosebumps on my exposed legs have occupied the area for a while so I wrap my arms around my stomach attempting to get some warmth into my body. The wind ruffles my hair causing me to look up from the cold concrete I walk upon to fix the hair that now covers my face. Only now do I realise I am being tailed by someone in a hoodie their shadow clear to me meaning he mustn’t be far behind. I almost decide to call Shawn but I remember that he is out with the boys for the night hence why I didn’t call him to pick me up when there were no cars available and I don’t want to ruin boys night for him. I make up my mind to try and pick up pace but by the looks of it every step I take he can double it in a second. A million streets start running through my mind trying to figure out the fastest way to get to a street that has people on it so nothing can possibly happen, but, every trace of those thoughts have been ripped from my mind as a hand is placed on my bare shoulder just beside the strap of my dress.

“Hey good looking “ I hear a deep voice from behind me and not a friendly one , more like one that shouts and screams at me in my nightmares. I brush him off and walk faster trying to ignore him. “Hey now beautiful no need to play hard to get” he snickers. My breathing starts to get irregular horrid heights racing through my mind at the speed of light and as I attempt to wash them through my mind never to be seen again I feel the hand on my shoulder again but it leaves straight after. Then everything happens all to fast.

I am pushed against the brick wall behind me a squeak of pain erupting from my lips as the rough brick scratches against my exposed skin. “ Come on - just a little fun, I promise it won’t hurt” the voice spits again and only now as I look into his fierce eyes I realise they are black and soulless, the look of a murderer, he will have no second thoughts. His evil grin causes a tear to slip out of my eye and as I go to wipe the salty mess away he grabs my hand with so much force I would never be able to fight it and pins them up against the wall. Next thing I know he has both my wrists on one hand staying above my head while the other swipes across my cheek wiping the tear away. “Please don’t” I whimper cringing away from the mans awful breath “sssshhhh puddin” he coos as he places a finger upon my lips his grip growing harder sure to grow bruises by tomorrow.. if I’m still here that is.

The tears are falling freely now no way to stop them. I attempt to move away and break fee but his grip is iron tight and I get absolutely no where. I squeeze my eyes shut awaiting the worst as I feel his hand slowly creep up my thing to the hem of my dress and further and I swear his wicked grin is etched into my memory never to leave, to haunt my dreams forevermore. I let Shawn fill my vision, his sweet smile, his adorable laugh that can light up anyone’s world. The way he kisses my forehead just before we cuddle up to sleep and when I can wake up in the morning and smile as I see him peacefully laying his curly hair lying over his head. If this is how it’s gonna end I want my thoughts to be full of him.

I snap my eyes open as I hear a rumble of what can only be a car and I scream as loud as I can and kick trying to get the attention of the headlights that edge closer to me every second. I breathe a sigh of relief as the car stops on the sidewalk next to me and only then do I realise it’s not a car it’s a black Jeep and not only that it’s Shawns. Immediately the attackers grip tightens even more of that was even humanly possible starting to drag me away further down the sidewalk away form Shawn. As I look over, a pleading look on my face I see Shawn’s fully functional curls emerge from the car at lightning speed not caring to shut the door behind him as he storms over to me a murderous look on his face. “LET HER GO NOW!” He screams and I my heart is filled with hope that I will make it out of this. As soon as Shawn is close enough his fist connects with the guys face knocking him clean o the floor taking me with him, his grip only realising when we hit the ground. I am a crying muddling mess in the ground as I watch Shawn drag the guy up from the floor punching him silly blood spilling all over the concrete.

Next I hear Geoff’s voice escaping through my ears, br I don’t look not daring to look away from Shawn. “Shawn ! Shawn stop your gonna kill him” Geoff says as he pulls Shawn of the guy giving him an opportunity to run and he takes it running as fast as his injured body will take him. My eyes are blurry with tears but I see Shawn make his way over to me his face softening up immediately. “Baby “ He whispers as he wipes the flow of tears that don’t seem to stop. “Come here “ He says as he picks me up from the ground me obviously not being in a state to move it all. He holds me tight not daring to let me go. Geoff gets in the driver sit and Shawn piles into the seat with me on his lap holding me close. As the Jeep gets moving Shawn continues to whisper sweet nothing into my ear kissing me lightly. “It’s okay baby, I got you, your safe , I love you so so much.” This continues until we arrive at our shared apartment and from there Geoff calls a cab and heads home while Shawn carry’s me up the starts to the bathroom sitting me on the counter as he starts a bath filling it with bubbles. I look in the mirror as he does so and gasp at the reflection see, my eyes are puffy and red from the crying bruises forming on my wrist and my shoulder. A little bit of blood trails down my shoulder form where the bricks scraped me making my red dress a even darker shade. I look down at my knees and see that they are scraped up pretty bad from falling and another tear escapes my eyes. Shawn sees me eyeing myself in the mirror and the yet slipping from my eye. He makes his way over to me and kisses me lightly and holds my hand his thumb rubbing them softly. “It’s okay baby your safe now” He whispers his forehead resting against mine. He reaches to undo my dress and I let him, my heels, bra and pantries following soon after. Once I am undressed Shawn lifts me up from the counter and places me onto the shooting warm bath. “There you are baby.” All I can do is stare at him as he grabs the face washer and soap gently cleaning my body with one hand and holding my hand with the other. He looks up from cleaning my body for a split second and catches eye contact with me and he drops the face washer a second later his hands caressing my face. “What is is sweety?” He asks. “What if you weren’t there Shawn, I could have I - “ I choke out. “ shhhh baby don’t think about that just think that your here and safe and no ones gonna hurt you and I am so sorry that happened to you” . I find it easy to get lost in his beautiful brown eyes so I just stare trying to lull the world away but then a though crosses my mind.

“How were you even there?” I ask. He sighs gently before answering. “Boys night finished early so I thought I’d come get you from where you were at with the girls and take you home and cuddle but when you were no where to found I thought I would look for you just in case you and your friends were up to know good cause goodness we know your crazy hun.” That gets a small smile from your face which makes Shawn give a soft one back. “ and then I saw you there pinned against the wall his hands going places they shouldn’t be and I just couldn’t get there fast enough, I wanted to kill the guy. My heart broke when I saw the tears coming down your face your eyes shut awaiting the worst” Shawn looks down tears in his eyes his hands still latched to mine. I lift his head up weakly with one of my hands . “Thankyou” I whisper. “ I love you” He says as he gets in his knees and places a sweet kiss on my lips. “ I love you too, and I’m here we’re both here I’ll be okay , we will be okay” I snuggle my face into the crook of his neck for a minute taking in the smell of his cologne, the one I love all to well. “Alright baby, time to get you out” I nod and let him wrap his arms around me, my legs not being able to function just yet. Then I rember he still has clothes on. “ Shawn your clothes!” I look up at him worried. “ I don’t care you rmore important than a pair of clothes that can dry, if anything happened to you I can just fix you, your my first priority” I give him a soft “okay” and lean into him letting him take care of me.

After I have finished getting dry and into sweatpants and one of Shawn’s t shirts we cuddle up in bed enjoying each other’s company. I am cuddled into Shawn his arms wrapped tightly around me , his hand making patterns across my stomach. Brief I love you’s are whispered from time to time and a short kiss on the head from Shawn. “ I don’t want to lose you , not ever “ Shawn admits. “ and I don’t want to lose you, you are my everything” I reply. “Forever” , “forever.” One more I love you is exchanged before we fall into a peaceful sleep.

********

I slowly open my eyes to the strong morning light coming from the window and I immediately turn over to cuddle into Shawn to enjoy the morning together but all that is waiting for me is a cold bed.

SOOOOO yeah hope you like it , part 2?

Love you guys 💕

[livtries]

paranoia s.m

(inspired by “Paranoid” by Lauv)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=atF2-onTR6M

summary: you and Shawn had met through a mutual friend, and had hit it off immediately, but you never really felt good enough for him, and you felt paranoid most of the time.

word count: 453

“Shawn?” You speak, your voice ringing through the house.

You two had been together for about a year and a half. You both loved each other very much, and would do almost anything for the other, but you just… didn’t feel good enough for Shawn sometimes.

“In here, honey,” he responds.

“Hey,” you smile, sitting down next to Shawn on the couch.

“Whatcha watching?” you question.

“Just some Grey’s Anatomy,” he smiles, kissing your forehead.

You nod, cuddling up to Shawn some more.

Whenever you and Shawn would have sex, or something like that, you would always seize up, and become so self conscious about your body, and about how you acted. Shawn always reassured you that he loved you, and always has, but you were never really convinced.

You’re just paranoid. It’s fine. You would always try to convince yourself, but you never really believed yourself, or Shawn sometimes.

“Babe. C’mere. You know I love you. You’re the best thing that has ever happened to me, and you know what.” Shawn would always say.

“Shawn, it really isnt that easy. I know, but I can’t convince myself that you love me… You say it all the time, and I love it, but…” you respond, looking at Shawn, your eyes filling with tears. “I just never feel like I’m good enough for you. I just feel like you never want me.” you add, still looking at him.

Shawn wipes away a stray tear than had fallen.

“It’s just that I know you love me, but I don’t love myself sometimes. And, I know that sounds corny, but more often than not I don’t like the way I look.” You say, tucking your head into the crook of Shawn’s neck.

“Babe. You’re beautiful. I love you, and you should love yourself too. You’re smokin’ hot, and nothing less.” Shawn smiles, kissing your forehead.

You sniffle, looking up at him. You blush, seeing him blush as well.

***

Shawn would sometimes have dreams about you, and about you loving someone else that wasn’t him. He would always wake up, upset. Not at the real you, but at him dreams, and mind.

“Shawn…” You speak, rolling over.

He would sometimes sit up in bed, trying so hard not to think about the dream.

“Did you have another dream?” you ask, putting your hand on his back.

He nods, frowning.

You don’t say anything. You just sit beside him, rubbing his back, and kissing his cheek every so often.

There were some nights where everything was fine, but some weren’t that good.

You were both so tired that you had no energy to even talk to the other. You would both just cuddle up in bed, falling asleep momentarily.

sorry for this being so short. I didn’t really have enough time to write, but I had this one all ready and edited, so I just decided to post it!

I really hope you like it. 

[1-800-sassy-mendes]

Haunted by Your Ghost part 2

Summary: You hear the song that Shawn released after his one year break. Which is about you. 

a/n: Hiii. I’ve been way too busy and it’s been way too long since I have written. Feels great to be typing, I love writing :D thanks for all the love for part 1, This idea just kind of came to me while I was listening to a song. Hope you guys still like it.

masterlist | part three 

Your name: submit What is this?

“Hey everyone, we have Shawn Mendes with us after a year of silence. So how have you been, Shawn?” You heard on the radio while you were stopped at a red light. You froze for a second, freaking out a little bit.

It’s been a while since you’ve heard his name on the radio, the whole world knows that he took a year off social media and music to have time for himself. You’ve overheard from Ian and Matt how Shawn spent his time on break. He moved on so fast, didn’t he? You were startled when you heard a car honk behind you. The light had turned green, you continued to drive.

“I’m nervous, man. Uh, It’s been a while.” You heard his voice and that chuckle that never changed except it got deeper. You wanted to change the station so bad, but you just didn’t have the energy to. You left it on the station since you were close to your apartment anyways.

“We missed you, Shawn!” The radio announcer said, your heart started beating faster because you have missed Shawn too. But from what you know on what he did over the break, he obviously didn’t miss you. “It’s been a long, long year since we have heard from the Shawn Mendes. What did you do in that year, Shawn? Anything fun?” Oh, I’m sure lots of fun with all those girls he spent his nights with.

You wondered if he was gonna say the truth, but of course you knew he wasn’t. You know the truth anyways. You didn’t have to have him confirm it, more or less on the radio. “I was writing music actually,” He answered. It confirmed what you already know.

They started talking about his new music that he has written, turns out that’s why he’s on the radio is to promote the song and everyone tuned in will hear the song for the first time. With a promise of explaining what the song and future album was about, the song started playing, but you were already parking. From the little snippet you heard of the song, the song was really good. You predict a few songs from his future album will be playing non-stop on the radio in a couple of months. Not a disappointment from him, it’s Shawn. He always, no doubt, release great songs. 

You walked in the apartment that you have been calling home for the past few months. A fresh new page that you spilled colored on, a change from Shawn’s neutral theme at his apartment. From the window, it was a view of buildings and houses of Pickering, with the endless sea in the background. It’s not as great as the view of the CN tower in Toronto, but it worked. 

Sipping your tea, you sat on your couch and snuggled up to a warm blanket. You never noticed it now, but you were using what used to be your favorite mug. It’s been left untouched in the back of your cupboard for all these months. After the break-up, the mug brought back way too many memories of Shawn. But you also couldn’t get yourself to get rid of the mug. 

As you stared at the mug, the memories came back. They all hurt, but the one that has to hurt the most is when you found out about what Shawn did during his one year break. 

You invited some of your friends for lunch, including Brian, Matt, and Ian, you knew they were with Shawn a lot. They’re not gonna leave Shawn in any under circumstances, they were always at Shawn’s apartment whenever they were in Toronto. 

As lunch went on, no one has brought up Shawn, it’s just been them catching me up on what’s been going on with their lives. Listening closely whenever either one of them talked, hoping that they’d mention something about Shawn. A little part of you knew you wanted to see if Shawn would take you back, but mainly you’ve missed your friends. 

Matt and Ian pulled out their phones out of their pockets at the same time. It confused me and you couldn’t help but look over to Ian’s screen beside me. It was a group text message with a few people. The only text message you were able to see was from what you think it says Andrew. ‘Bell boy said he’s brought back another girl last night.’ 

You pretended to laugh at the joke that your friend, Julia, said. You didn’t even hear the joke she said. You were kind of thinking it was Shawn’s manager, Andrew Gertler, but who knows how many Andrews they know? 

“What the hell.” Beside you, Ian caught your ears by saying that under his breath. He tapped Brian’s shoulder and showed him his phone. Brian shook his head. You were 100% sure it was about Shawn. You excused yourself to go to the bathroom. 

“Shawn’s been fucking around,” When you were about to go back to the table, you heard Shawn getting mentioned at the table. You decided to stand where they can’t see you and listen in. “Different girls every night.” 

“What-” One of your other friends You didn’t want to hear the rest of the conversation so you went back to the bathroom and came back a few minutes later. 

You were so lost in the memories that you didn’t notice that drops of rain were falling, and so were your tears. 

“Have you heard Shawn Mendes’ new song?” Your co-worker, Anne asked you and your other co-worker, Tina. 

You froze for a second, feeling so relieved when Tina immediately answered. “Yes! I loved it. So, raw and intimate.”

“What was it about?” You asked, tried not to sound way too interested. You haven’t heard Shawn’s new song at all, you were already missing him way too much.

“I heard it was about his ex girlfriend.” Your heart beat doubled upon hearing this. There was no way, the whole world knows he doesn’t have a girlfriend all those years you were together. And you knew very well that it’s not for Lauren.

“How did you know?” You asked, stuttering a little bit. 

“He admitted it on the radio yesterday.” Tina replied. How you wished you wanted to hear the song and the interview after. You did hear that he was on the radio, but that was about it.

Anne immediately added, “Hard to think that he could’ve been married by now, he didn’t have a girlfriend all those time.” 

You scrunched up your forehead, not having a clue what she just said. “What?”

“On the song lyrics, it said he was gonna put a ring on your hand but you walked out on me or something like that. I don’t think that means anything other than he was gonna propose to her.” Anne answered in a matter of fact way. 

Upon hearing that, you felt goosebumps on your skin and your heart dropped to your stomach. You couldn’t process anything that they said after that. You just kept on thinking on how you wanted to listen to the song. 

Your boss ended up sending you home for the day because she said you didn’t look like you felt well. You agreed without a fight, everyone was talking about Shawn in the office, everyone has seemed to have listened to the song. It made you want to listen to it too. 

When you got to your car, you didn’t waste anytime in looking up his new song. You didn’t care if you were wasting data, or if you were in the basement parking of the building you worked in. You couldn’t wait to listen to it till you got home. 

The first time it was playing on the radio, you weren’t really listening to the lyrics but right now, it hit you word for word. A tear, followed by others fell down your cheeks. You instantly knew the song was for you, he thought about you non-stop in that year and he really was gonna propose to you. He loved you and what you two had was real, you knew it all this time. Shawn didn’t have to tell the whole world that you guys were together for you to know that he loved you. You were being selfish. You focused on the bad things about being with him rather than all the amazing memories you both shared and the great things of being with him. 

Once you calmed down a little bit, you just kept on driving. Not sure where you were going. Surely you’ll go somewhere you love. Forgetting about the whole what Shawn did over his one year break, you just kept on driving. Driving past the cinema you and your friends spent so many late nights. Your old high school. The park that you met Ian, Matt, and Shawn. 

Your heart beat doubled, for what seemed like the millionth time in a span of 48 hours, when you saw the black Jeep in the driveway of the house you could never forget. The house you spent so many hours in, swimming or laughing the day away. The house that felt like a second home for so many years. You used to be here all the time, and it’s crazy to think that you haven’t been back here in more than a year. 

You didn’t know what was happening to you. The next thing you knew, you parked right beside that Jeep, like how you always have done, walked to the front door and rung the door bell. It took a minute to open, but you were welcomed by a pair of surprised brown eyes. 

“Y/n.”

[thatjusthappned]

I need you

“I have so many people to thank for my success, my fans, and my team. Which I would love to thank right now, but I really need to thank my ex wife who has always been been there for me. Who gave me an amazing life, and a beautiful son that has my heart in hand like his mother. So this is for them and I love you!” I says blowing a kiss to the crowd. Now what was the next step after revealing my divorce to the public after a 5 month silence on the state of our relationship. After TMZ got pictures of us leaving a lawyers office and leaving in separate cars they came out with the story that we had split and even thought it was true we hadn’t told our family about the choice we made. 

“Shawn.” Andrew said as I walked off stage, I just keep walking “Shawn.” he said again louder this time. I still keep walking “Shawn!” he yells making me stop “Shawn, if you need to talk. Let’s talk, if you don’t want to talk to me please talk to someone.” He says calmly as he makes me look at him as he gently holds the back of my neck. “I’m good man, just need to get home. He steps back places his hands now on my shoulders nodded and says “Okay, the cars outside just waiting if you wanna go now.” I give him a small fake smile and start walking again. 

“Hello Mister Mendes, Where would you like to go?” The Driver asked “Home please.” I say as the words seem to sting because home really isn’t home. He’s has the radio on and it’s a good thing because I needed something to make me forget the fact that I was going home to a empty house.

I walk into the house, going strait to the liquor cabinet, grab a bottle.  Then sitting my ass on the couch. About a little more than half the bottle later and I was shit faced and I couldn’t stand myself anymore. I couldn’t stand that I ruined my marriage, I couldn’t stand that I felt like I barely knew my son. I couldn’t stand that I gave up everything in my personal life for selfish reasons. At this point the platinum records, the trophies didn’t mean anything, I had lose everything warm in my life and I got cold metal to replace them. This cause me to blame them, and I hated them. So I started smashing them, breaking them with no care for my well being. 

“Shawn I’m home and I brought some food.” Brian says walking through the door and then looks at the disaster in the living room. I sat there drinking from another bottle with my hands bleeding and hurting. “Shawn what the fuck.” He says concerned walking over to me “It wasn’t wroth it.” I say and bring the bottle back up to my lips for the countless time. “What wasn’t?” He asked he’s dealt with these fits quite a lot the passed 6 months, none this bad exactly. “The albums, the tours, the award shows. I loss her because of them man, I fucked everything up.” I say calmly for the state that I’m in. “Shawn you always ask me to be honest to you. So I’m going to be, you did this, she was always there for you, she gave up a lot for you, Stopped working to be with you on tours. married you before she wanted to because you ‘couldn’t wait more’  and then had your baby despite her wanting to wait a little longer. All she wanted to do was make you happy, that was all. She said she was done, and you said okay. Your one attempt to make her happy was to let her go. The one time you should have been selfish you weren’t. This is on you man. Just be happy it ended good; that there’s no hate between you two. That you didn’t end up hating each other, She loves you Shawn. I know she still does. You need to understand that the only one that hated you, is you.” he said standing up grabbing the bottle “Now go clean yourself up.” and I stand up stumbling but I make it to my room. I imagine he’s cleaning up after me like normal, and I feel bad once again.

Getting to my room I head to the bathroom, where I look at myself for a second looking at the mess looking back at me. How much I hated him and I punch the mirror. “I need to call her.” I say grabbing my phone,  but I text her. If i call her she’ll know I’m drunk and she’ll just get Brian to check on me. “Y/N I’d like to talk to you right now please and thank you it’s very important”  I send then get back “Be there in a little bit.” and I go sit on my bed just waiting for her. 

***

There’s a knock on the door and she pokes her head in with a smile on her face. “Can I come in?” she asked as if I didn’t asked her for to come over.  I nod knowing if I started talking she’d know I’d been drinking and will be discussed with me. She comes in and sits next to me. “You’ve been drinking Shawn.” I nodded and she humms to her self “Don’t leave until I’m saying what I need to say please.” I say looking at my hands and looking down “I’m not leaving Shawn, but lets go get you cleaned up.” I nod and we walk into the bathroom “Damn it Shawn.” She says as she sees the mirror. I look down “I know.”. Y/n starts to clean me up. 

“ I need you.” I say she sighs “No please, I need you. I miss sleeping in  the same bed as you, I miss smelling like you when I leave for the tour. I miss lazy days with you and Ryan. Fuck I miss Ryan, I miss looking at him and knowing that he’s both of us. I miss knowing that you were always there-” Y/n stopped me “Want to know what I don’t miss? I don’t miss our son waking up in the middle of the night asking why I’m crying and why his mommy is so sad. I don’t miss you coming home twice a month, if we’re lucky, and Ryan not wanting to go to sleep because he wants to spend as much time with you as possible. Do you realize that in the passed 5 months you’ve been present more in Ryans life then you have been for the pass 4 years? I don’t miss you telling me your coming home and Then texting saying plans have changed, or something came up. I don’t miss being in a house you build for me, in a big ass bed alone and feeling so fucking unhappy. I don’t miss being alone Shawn. I was alone, you left me alone.” She’s crying and This is the first time I realized what I’ve really done. I place my hands on the sides of her head “Shawn I fucking love you, with every ounce of my being. I never wanted it to come to this. I’ve always knew you’re the love of my life, you still are. I just can’t be the wife that is living this beautiful live and still be so fucking sad. Shawn I know, you need me, I need you too. That’s the thing.” Y/n takes a break to crying. 

I wait until she stops crying so hard “I am sorry for being so selfish with you. I was a bad boyfriend and that made me a bad husband. I was unfair, and I was wrong for so many years Y/n. You are the best and always will be the best thing that’s happened to me. I should have done more to make you know that.” I say crying also. “Shawn we need time. We need to be friends again. Then if we still feel the way we do now, we can get back together, but not now, not anytime soon,” I nodded and she looks up at me and we smile at each other, “I’ve been drinking too.” She says and we laugh together. I look at her and she looks at me, then we lean in and kiss. It’s a long kiss but it’s just a normal kiss. Nothing was going to come from it but we both knew this was the last kiss for a long while. But it made me appreciate the next one to come so much more.

[imfreefallinall]

Socks (Boyfriend Shawn)

2,2k words of funny, fluffy and a little bit horny Shawn. A small blurb inspired by my brother, who always wears socks with flipflops (I do too, sometimes). Anyone else here does it? Also inspired by October and Halloween, while we wait to see what that idiot is gonna wear this year (I'm here for Shawn as Danny Zuko tbh). A little bit of smut but nothing too serious.

Let me know what you think because feedback is, as always, appreciated! If you want to be tagged just send me a message!

Love ya, B.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(Y/N’s POV)

“Hun! Just landed. Coming home soon! I love you” he was coming back home, finally, and for the first time, I would have been there. I moved into his condo two days before he left for the festival run, six weeks ago. Since then, I’ve been occupied to transform this place to home. I prepared a special night for the two of us, a cosy but lovely night in with his favourite homemade Italian food and Harry Potter film. I was thrilled because now we would have been able to start this new journey as cohabitees.

I was sitting on the bed when I heard the sound of keys entering the lock. Quickly I slipped on my flipflops, still wearing socks ‘cause it was raining and it was pretty cold. I ran to the hall and jumped in his arms as soon as he threw his bags to the floor.

“Jeez, I could really get used to this, baby” he smiled whispering in my ear, lifting me up and spinning around a little.

“Shawn, slow down! I don’t wanna fall” I laughed, mocking him for being the clumsiest person on Earth.

“You know I won’t let you fall” he smiled, lifting my chin up with a finger and kissing me slowly for a few seconds.

“Uh, I’ve missed you. C’mon, I wanna see how you rearranged the place” my feet touched the floor again and it was in that moment that he noticed.

“Oh my god, not you too! Don’t wear your flipflops like that. C’mon, take ‘em off. Or the socks, or the shoes! Better none of them” he screamed, kneeling to take off the sandals from my feet.

“What’s wrong with that?” I shrugged, curling my naked toes cause the floor was cold.

“Just a bad memory” he laughed nervously, rapidly shaking his head and making his long curls dance a little.

“Wanna tell me?” I said lifting up his bag and making my way into the laundry, putting all of his clothes in the washing machine.

“Mhh no. Not wanna remember anymore” he sounded disgusted and I burst into laughter.

“ Y/N! It’s not funny! I am traumatized!” he continued, high pitched voice.

“Sure, hun. Let’s go, wanna know what you think about our small garden.”

“ Y/N, it’s a condo! We don’t have a fucking garden”

“We have a balcony” I smiled cunningly.

“Oh, god.”

(later that night)

“There’s no way I’m fucking you if you don’t take off those damn socks” he declared, laying already naked on the bed.

“Why not? I thought you had a problem with socks paired with flipflops, not only socks” I laughed, taking off my panties without peeling off my socks.

“I can’t fuck with you while I’m thinking about... mhh about that!” he still didn’t want to tell me what was his problem with socks.

“Fine, it means you’re not that into sexual abstinence” I laughed

“Goddamnit! Fine, but I’m in charge tonight. I’d rather look at your tits than your feet” he said flipping us around and starting to kiss my neck. Ah, the power of vaginas is incredible.

(a few weeks later)

I was looking at my reflection in the mirror, thinking I looked very good. Shawn’s stylist chose a long red dress for me to wear that night, paired with high silver heels.

“Babe we’ve gotta go! Jake’s already downstairs with the car” he shouted from the living room.

“Coming!” I replied, catching my purse and black leather jacket. I walked into the room where my boyfriend was waiting for me, handing me my coat.

“You look beautiful, you know? Everyone’s eyes are gonna be on you tonight” he smiled proudly

“Probably because it’s our first official appearance?” I looked at him, nervously rubbing my hands. He takes one of them in his tattooed one and softly caresses the back of it.

“We’ll be okay, babygirl. It’s just... a different night out with our friends. You know you don’t have to walk on the red carpet with me if you really don’t feel like doing it” he reminded me, but I knew he really wanted me by his side that night.

“Will you always hold my hand?”

“Never letting it go, sweetheart”

“I’ll be fine, then” I smiled a little, trying to reassure the both of us.

(after Shawn’s performance, sitting at the table, waiting for the show to go on after commercials )

“....and he caught me fucking that girl in Liverpool. I was still wearing socks and flipflops, don’t ask me why ‘cause I was too drunk! He didn’t talk to me once the following day, probably too traumatized to look at my face without thinking about my marble-hard butt” Geoff ended to describe me the episode that shocked Shawn that much. The whole table was laughing so hard, except for Shawn, whose cheeks were burning red.

“So this is why you don’t want to wear socks anymore!” I said between small giggles, wiping a tear that escaped from the corner of my eye.

“It’s not that I don’t wanna wear socks anymore, I just don’t wanna see them. If they’re covered by shoes I’m fine!” Shawn tried to explain, embarrassed, but we were all already laughing when he finished.

“Guys, he didn’t even want to have sex with me because I was still wearing socks! I was trying to spill this story out of him but he really wouldn’t say a word!” I said, remembering the first night he came home.

“Yes but then I gave you three orgasms so you shouldn’t complain” he smirked, making me blush. I punched his arm.

“Shawn! Shut up!”

They were all laughing again.

(October 31st, Shawn’s annual Halloween party)

“C’mon baby I wanna see why you denied a couple costume!“ shouted Shawn from the closet.

“You’ll have to wait, Shawnie” I laughed from the bathroom, blow my hair dry and tidying them in a high ponytail.

“What’s up with you and the guys? No one told me how you’re gonna get dressed. It’s still my party!” he complained, joining me to put some gel in his hair.

“You look great, John” I laughed, trying to change the topic.

“I see what you’re doing there. And I’m not John, I’m Danny Zuko” he smiled proudly

“Sure, hun. We have forty-five minutes before everyone arrives... I really wanna ruin that bad hairstyle of yours” I smiled, dropping the soft towel that was covering my naked body.

“Shit, I hate you. Just know that if you show up dressed up as something stupid I’m kicking you out” he smirked, taking off his belt.

“There’s my name too on the door” I smiled proudly

“If you keep smiling like that there’s gonna be only one name and it’s gonna be Mendes” he replied, lifting me up on the cold marble surface

“Mhhh this is such a bad proposal, I expected something better. But I love you” I joked, loving the way he kept things simple. Was he serious though?

“Let me show you how much I love you” he said, kissing my thighs and burying his face between them, making me moan and giggle at the same time.

(forty minutes later)

“Shawn hurry up! Someone’s knocking at the door” I screamed putting on my favourite sparkling pair of pantyhose.

“But I wanna see what you’re gonna wear!” he complained again making his way to the door to greet our guests

“It’s a surprise! You’ll see it in five, just let me finish here”

“Sure” he muttered, disappearing down the hallway.

I smiled and I started to put on the moulded cardboard.

“We’re here” Brian texted me. I made my way into the living room as soon as I heard Shawn’s scream.

“Get out of my building! You dickheads!” he joked, laughing hysterically

“What? Don’t you like it?” I spoke from behind him, making him turn around.

“Uhh I knew you were hiding something in the junk closet but I hoped it was some sexy thing, not this shit!”

“Ehi! We handmade them!”

“YOU DRESSED UP AS FUCKING GIANT SOCKS, Y/N!” he smiled, laughing and hugging me.

“Will you ever let it die?”  he smiled kissing my cheek

“No way, bro” replied Brian, making his way into the apartment with the other fools.

“If you want I bought a matching Sandy costume” I said, happy that our prank turned out funny and didn’t ruin his mood. You never knew with Shawn.

“Mhh maybe later, I like being the only cool guy around tonight. You guys really are embarrassing, I’m gonna have to explain to all the other guests why you’re dressed up like this”

“No need” I smirked, turning my back to him “we are all wearing a sign with the story written on it”

“Y/N!” he exclaimed, giggling and making his way to greet his friends.

(a few months later)

“I’m coming home, love! Got In-N-out with me. Pick up a film, I love you” announced the Snapchat Shawn just sent me. I smiled and started to light up all of the candles I placed around the house. I slipped into my new favourite white lingerie set and wore one of his shirts, who fit me like a mini dress. I also made sure to wear a fluffy, pink pair of warm socks. I laughed at the memory of Halloween.

“Babe I’m here!” a warm, familiar voice exclaimed. My boyfriend’s tall figure entered the room and I rapidly hugged him tightly.

“How was your flight, babe?” I whispered, covering his face with kisses.

“Mhh too long. I wanted to see you”

“What were you doing in Italy again? I’m happy you got to see my family. Sorry I couldn’t join” I added with a quite sad tone.

“Yeah I met them for like fifteen minutes, I was very busy. I met a new producer anyway” he didn’t sound much convinced though. Maybe he was just tired.

“Let me just put your clothes in the washing machine, then we can eat. You wanna take a shower?” I asked kindly, brushing his cheekbone with my thumb before lifting his bag from the ground and walking down the hallway.

“Yes and please join me”

“If we get there in two the food is gonna get cold” I joked, entering the small laundry room with him by my side and starting to put his dirty clothes into the machine.

“Doesn’t matter, I missed you” he whispered standing behind me. I put his bag on the shelf, certain it was empty.

“Hang on, you forgot something” he added, kneeling to collect a strange pair of socks from the left side pocket. He threw one into the machine, opening the other one and pulling a white velvet box from it.

“Oh my god” I whispered, looking at him standing on his right knee at my feet.

“You didn’t believe that was my proposal back at Halloween, did you?” he laughed and I nodded my head, giggling a little to contain the tears.

“Babygirl, since the first time I laid my eyes on you I knew you were special. We get on well so well, honey, you really are my other half. Sometimes it is even scary” he laughed “you complete my days and I love coming home to you. I would love to come home to you and our kids, one day. And since you are so old-fashioned, I guess marriage is the first step in this new chapter of our lives. And I really can’t wait to start this new chapter with you. I promise I’ll be by your side whenever you’ll need me and even when you won’t I’ll be there to support you and be happy with you. I promise to always make you laugh, to always share my food and my bed with you and to always lend you a pair of my socks if your feet are cold. I want this all with you, do you? Will yo-”

“Yes! Of course I will” I smiled, happy tears running down my face while I bowed to wrap my arms around him. He opened the little box to reveal a stunning, shining solitaire. I looked up to find his amazing, bright smile; small wrinkles all over his face, tears making his eyes sparkle. We giggled looking at each other’s watery eyes, his right shaky hand slipping the ring on my finger.

“Looks good on you” he smiled. I kissed him deeply for a few seconds. He smiled against my lips.

“This is the reason why I was in Italy.. to talk to your dad and to pick up the ring. It’s customized. In the band there’s a small stone from Sardinia since your mum was born there and..you know, you’re so attached to that place that I thought it would have been nice to have it always with you” he explained.

“I love it, I love you” I smiled and he kissed me deeply again.

“Now, tell me...was it necessary to put it in a smelly sock?”

“It was a clean one!” he laughed “and, you know, now I will always associate a good memory to socks. Not Geoff’s butt anymore” we laughed.

I couldn’t wait for the rest of our lives.

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