#setting: post-apotheosis

[akihatohnoofficial]

did some more oc writing btw. no cannibalism this time just grave robbing

Iuris lies dead in the ground. A god without a heart cannot live, and hers has been thoroughly destroyed. Of course, she wasn't always dead. She lived a long life, one with many titles. The Shining Star, the God of Order, Apotheosis, a corpse in the ground.

Alodia walks up to the grave, shovel in hand. She laid dead once, too. Not just once, of course. This is... which life this is, she's lost track. Perhaps she finally hit the one hundred and fifty mark. After dying twenty times, you tend to lose track of the rest.

Iuris lies dead in the ground. She was slain by a brave party of heroes, ones who wanted to see the sky. A shame, really. She thought she was doing the right thing, she would bring them all to paradise. No use mulling over the past, though. You can't do that when you're dead.

Alodia sighs and hefts the shovel, stabbing it down into the ground and planting a foot on it to push further down. Years ago, she would have had someone else do this for her. A loyal employee, or maybe another one of her clones. She doesn't have any of that anymore. She's dead, after all. Now she just has herself, the last of her magitech, and the grave she has been searching for.

Iuris lies dead in the ground. She didn't know it was inevitable. Why would she? All those stories with heroes and villains, the hero triumphs and restores the world to peace. She just didn't realize that she was not the hero.

Alodia pants with exertion, stopping as her shovel hits something. That's it. That's her. Her fated enemy, the guiding star that had guided her hatred for so long and eventually led to her downfall. She takes a moment to wipe the sweat off her brow, then gets to work unearthing her.

Iuris lies dead. She is in a casket, a form of burial rarely offered to slain gods. Her killers were kind enough to just slay her, and not devour her body like she had done to the god before her. Although most of her followers had perished and many others were in hiding for trying to help her destroy the world, the few who remained had managed to make a convincing plea for allowing her to be buried with dignity.

Alodia drags the casket to her truck, later unloading it at her base. The preparations are all completed, and as she clicks the casket open and sees her enemy's decaying face all she can do is smile. She doesn't believe in soulmates, but if she did... well, that wouldn't matter. Iuris's soul was destroyed, so an artificial one will have to do.

Sirius's eyes flicker open, a new life entering her body as her eyes adjust to Alodia's dim laboratory. She... died? She can remember dying, but everything else is gone. Who is this woman smiling at her, and why does she feel familiar? Sirius shakes her head to try and remember, but the only sensation she gets is the sound of the unfamiliar woman's voice.

"Good morning, starlight. How was your rest?"

[burning-sol]

how did i manage to accidentally make an entire ref sheet twice?? this was just meant to be silly art what the fuck.. anyways. rumi.

[julystruck]

ABSOLUTELY GIRLFLOPPING THROUGH LIFE 💯 🔥💯 🔥💯 🔥💯 🔥💯 🔥💯 🔥

[waterfall-ambience]

yes the main town in the globeland project is called brightfield. yes the alternate dimension version of it is called darkfield. yes the name is significant in that they refer to microscopy techniques and it was a coincidence i decided to roll with.

[throwaway-yandere]

Apotheosis Upon Your First Feast (Yandere!Wanderer & Pantalone/Reader)

Commissioned by: @leftdestiny-posts/@eternally-frozen (ilysm. Feel free to kill me later lmao)

unreliable synopsis: After being reassigned to Vanarana when your previous coworker became the Acting Grand Sage, with the help of Ararycan, you reunited met a wanderer on an abandoned machine. Unfortunately for someone, your childhood friend "Pantalone" has ears and eyes everywhere. (Avoid this fic if you’re not a fan of dark content. It’s not too dark but your mental health matters!) 

IMPORTANT NOTE: Please use the InteractiveFics extension and change “(Y/n)” to whatever name you want, “[Wanderer]” to his chosen name, and lastly, also change “(wood/salt)” to… whichever option you feel like. It’s a surprise mechanic *wink*. If you're reading this on a phone, just pick between wood or salt right now, keep your choice in mind and commit to it : )

Afterwards, would you be so kind as to answer this fun poll after reading the fic? Danke ♡

“Why doesn't Nara (Y/n) eat what Arasaka prepares for them? Does Nara (Y/n) lack appetite lately?”

“O-Oh, well, that’s…” You paused, looking down at the broth, “in all honesty, your cooking tastes bland…”

“H-Huh?!”

Time had passed since Lesser Lord Kusanali's official ascent to power and now is the fifth month since you first made friends with the Aranaras. Many events took place before you found your pyro vision becoming Arasaka's torch as they cooked– and if any of your coworkers saw you now, they probably wouldn’t identify you as Alhaitham’s (only) friend and Ex-Sage Azar’s lazy employee.

Maybe they would've if you helped Alhaitham and his teammates secure Sumeru’s future.

Sure, your name isn’t listed in the coup d’etat, but that’s only because you wished for the Akademiyan scholars to make the epiphany for themselves. As Azar’s ex-assistant, you laid low from projects as a prerequisite so that the populace may acquire a personality of their own to make the nation truly deserving of the title “Land of Wisdom.” 

Alas, that did not happen.

Alhaitham’s tactics were not wrong, but you felt like his group spoonfed Sumeru citizens with the Fatui’s crimes rather than having their own realizations. It did not feel like growth to you. It felt like the people casually learned from a one-sitting textbook rather than a hands-on experiment when they should’ve personally learned how minacious blind ambitions could be. In turn, he argued that your ideas were barbaric and that scholars revolting was not in the realm of possibility– hence, you did not lend your aid. Perhaps your inaction had pissed him off, but it’s more likely that he finds that sending you to Varanara was ideal for his workload. 

And in some strange domino effect, refraining from helping a coup d’etat meant eating the tasteless food known to man.

Since you were personally assigned a senseless task to patrol and report weather patterns in the area (which is unnecessary and quite frankly boring), you had befriended the infamous aranaras children from Port Ormos hear stories about. 

But the mundanity doesn’t hurt your pride as a graduate scholar. It's been fun so far.

“I'm sorry, 'Saka, it's just that I think your food lacks a bit of salt–"

"ASSISTANT (Y/N), THERE YOU ARE!!!"

Both of you flinched, causing Arasaka to topple over. The sound hurts. You snapped your neck towards the sound. An adventurer– Baharak– stood with both hands wrapped on her bag's shoulder straps with a silly grin on her face.  

… You’re turning the setting of your hearing aids down.

“Baharak, it’s been a while,” you spoke. “Would you mind not yelling whenever you call for me?”

“Oops– Sorry (Y/n)! I mean– sorry, Assistant (Y/n).”

Changing her volume doesn’t undo the pain she inflicted on your ears. Gently, you pushed Arasaka behind an elevated jag of root to cover them. To escape suspicion, you continued to stare at Baharak while feigning sleepiness.

“What are you here for?”

“The Forest Watcher received a letter addressed to you. The sender doesn’t have a name again, it just has the coin-seal thing.”

“Please hand it over.”

“Aight!– I mean, alright.”

After dismissing the loud adventurer and giving her spare mora as thanks, you waited until she was out of sight. Arasaka suddenly rose and jumped onto your lap, equally curious about what was written on the salt-scented parchment. Arasaka's preppy manner soon turned sour as they discovered who the sender was.

It’s a letter from your best friend, "Pantalone".

“Aww…” Arasaka whined. “Arasaka was hoping it was the Verdant Nara instead.”

You tore it open.

 

"My dearest, (Y/n),

If it's not too much to ask, may I trouble you to visit my office in Northland Bank soon? I merely wish to see you. Spending Lantern Rite alone this year was not a pleasant experience. It's just for a mere chat- I'll reimburse your traveling and dining expenses. Care to make it up to me?

Your beloved,

As per tradition, you threw the letter in the fireplace. Pantalone doesn’t like leaving a trail of evidence, naturally, you assumed the same applies here.

It's never a chore to visit a friend. Maybe you'll head there tomorrow–

“Arasaka doesn’t like Nara Pantalone.”

The aranara lowered their head, continuing, “Nara Pantalone reminds Arasaka of the Taste of Sadness.”

Cute. 

Every time Pantalone comes to visit, the aranaras behave like envious little siblings. Ever since you started patrolling Vanarana, the place had become the harbinger’s premiere leisure destination. The woods critters frequently tried to undermine his gifts, but they were adorably ineffective. Even if Pantalone cannot see them, the situation is nonetheless amusing.

If you remember correctly, the Taste of Sadness means salt to aranaras, right?

“Ah, well,” you laughed. “I guess you must be incredibly sensitive to his smell. He took quite a liking to salt-infused perfumes last year.”

“Don’t like perfume.”

“But I am wearing one though… Has the scent been bothering you all this time, Arasaka?”

“No, Arasaka was wrong. Arasaka likes perfume, and Arasaka hates salt. Taste of sadness. The scent of sadness.” 

“Oh, no! If Pantalone’s smell makes my dear Arasaka sad, then maybe we should drown him in Varunastra,” you chuckled darkly, expecting the aranara to react loudly over your out-of-pocket remark.

“Of course. Salt Nara would make for decent spare rations!”

You laughed out loud at Arasaka’s even more out-of-pocket reply. Out-of-pocket is an understatement, that comment straight up sounded out-of-the-CASKET. 

Before standing up, you ruffled Arasaka’s nonexistent hair like you would with your deceased sisters.

“I’ll come back in a few days, okay? In the meantime, why don’t you read a cookbook?”

“Hmph! Nara (Y/n), you’re being mean! Just wait! My sisters will make a dish Nara (Y/n) can’t say “no” to!” 

“It’s a dumb risk.”

“It’s a new business venture, dearest.”

“The market for new eyeglasses isn’t going to rise any time soon.”

“Why are you so adamant on opposing this idea?”

“Stagnation breeds putrefaction, especially in business, does it not?” You raised an eyebrow, preparing for a harangue. 

“Je suis d’accord!” The man spoke softly, accentuating his Fontaine pronunciation somewhat boastfully. Knowing your disability, he never raises his voice to the point of it hurting. “And it is precisely why I want to invest in an eyewear conglomerate in Sumeru.”

“Then why are you dropping your prior investments?!”

“Because it’s the right thing to do.”

You sighed, annoyed.

Pantalone is an amazing businessman, but without your council, he wouldn’t amount to who he is now. Unlike most people, “sneakily ambitious” are not the words you would describe your visionless friend. Such a moniker sounds insulting given his lack of celestial blessings and you know Celestia itself never took kindly towards his well-versed dirty tricks against his opponents.

In your humble opinion, the term “industrious” is a better-suited and less backhanded compliment for him.

You’ve known Pantalone— no— “██████” since childhood. Your history stretched back so much that you no longer recall the circumstances of how you befriended him. He acted as your ears when it came to haggling and normal day-to-day chores. As far as you know, he has always been an older brother to you. In times of extreme poverty, you both prayed and starved together, scraping by using salt rocks as entrees. 

There was no one else that made your deafness bearable except for him. With no family left, he was your only beacon of hope and dear Morax– you’d rather not remind yourself of the time your dead sisters mistakenly ate mud for rice cakes when famine struck.  

You chose Amurta out of the Six Great Schools for a reason:

You can’t afford to watch anyone die of hunger ever again.

When you began living in Sumeru, you had pledged your alliance with the region but never forgot all the toil you had to go through. As a malnourished child, you quickly fell in love with the nation. In Sumeru, healthcare was free– in Liyue? You heard nothing, and you wished that “advantage” doesn’t make you blind from the evil you witnessed in the slums. Poverty ate away your hearing, your family, and your childhood dreams… 

In a way, the only reason you see aranaras in the first place may be that you didn’t have the chance to experience any childlike wonder until you escaped Liyue.

Pantalone scoffed, “whether you agree with my financial decision or not doesn't affect my resolve. Do not press more about this, dearest.”

… But you’re convinced that your closest confidant “██████” had already perished from starvation long ago.

The man before you calls himself “Pantalone” nowadays and you lose all sense of indolence whenever his presence looms. When he watched your last sister perish in your arms, an epiphany gave birth to his cold demeanor towards deities. He found it challenging to worship the Archons who had no need for mora but were eager to take it away from destitute mortals who needed it as you and your sisters did. The death of your younger sibling was his final straw, and in a sense, you also buried your old friend that night. 

Unlike ██████, Pantalone cannot forgive nor trust the Archons for their broken promises. If Lesser Lord Kusanali had abandoned withered forests, Rex Lapis had abandoned those whose blood and tears cannot amount to any mora. You were only allowed to study at the Akademiya after he decided the former was the lesser evil.

Although Pantalone never condemns you for calling him by his birth name, you cannot tell yourself that he and ██████ are fully the same person. There is an unspoken need to straighten your posture and greet him with a semi-scowl to demonstrate your maturity despite him acting cozy and warm. Worse, his lax demeanor never ceases to remind you that despite his uncomfortable reputation, Pantalone is the only companion you’d entrust your soul to even when the world warns you not to deal a contract with the devil.

“You just want to use new brackets every day—”

“I am a businessman, love.”

You speared Pantalone with a pointed look.

“—And why Sumeru? Have you landed a deal with a reputable Amurtan optician? And why didn’t you ask ME first? You weren’t cornered by Dottore or the Tianquan to kickstart an eyeglasses company, were you?”

He scowled, unamused before firing back without skipping a beat. 

“Summer, seven years ago. You accidentally bought six bunraku puppets from Inazuma—”

Your eyes widened. Not this embarrassing anecdote again.

“Woah, woah! Now, why are YOU extorting me?”

“So you’d be silenced quicker.”

“…”

This reticence was slowly exasperating the harbinger, but he never utters a complaint when you're whom he's conversing with. Pantalone cleared his throat with an elegant smile. In that moment of cessation, you figured that he had a seemingly innocent proposal in mind.

“(Y/n), my most dearest baobei…” The harbinger ventured.

“Pantalone…”

He pulled out his desk drawer and ferreted out a parcel that you suspect contains a pair of glasses.

“Would you care to be a test sub—”

“No.”

You have a gut feeling as to where this is going. He’s going to propose that it’s “just” glasses until you find out he’s been using you to track or spy on someone without your knowledge. Classic Pantalone. You won't be duped by that TWICE in a row. If you knew better, you wouldn’t have accidentally leaked intel to the Fatui that Katheryne was being controlled by the Lord of Verdure. All because Pantalone hid a recorder on one of his “gifted” hearing aids...

Listen— just because you refused to lend a hand to the Archon when she was in need and was subsequently confronted by the 2nd harbinger in Sumeru City doesn’t mean you were colluding with these fools. 

You just wanted to remain neutral in any given situation. Unlike your childhood friend, politics bore you to death. And just like the Acting Grand Sage, you’re too lazy to act as a beta tester no matter how minimal the effort the task requires.

“I only ask that you wear this pair of glasses and test its comfortability.”

“I refuse.”

“We can negotiate how much mora you’ll earn—”

“Just stop.”

“Hmm, if I phrase it as a “gift”, would you accept—”

“Hell no.”

Pantalone paused.

“Hmm…” He tapped his desk, gazing at the paperwork neatly piled up.

“Word of advice, (Y/n), it’s highly probable that the price of cocoa will rise next week,” he shrugged. “That fact is, of course, most definitely unrelated to our current discussion.”

Is he… 

Is he threatening to generate chocolate inflation over a pair of glasses?!

You scoffed, eyes wide.

“██████, you worthless SCALPER.“

“The majority prefer to call me a ‘regrator’, but that new nickname is acceptable as long as it is you who makes such mildly unpleasant utterances.”

“GAH! You— YOU—” Even though he may completely ruin your usual routine of buying chocolates after work, it's difficult to curse him out. You have no choice but to spout illogical syllables without a valid clause. “JUST— YOU!!! YOU.”

Smack.

Upon hearing your facepalm resoundingly, he laughed uncontrollably, removing his glasses to wipe his eye with an uneven grin on his face. He tried to keep his composure but he kept snorting. 

You took a peek between your fingers. What a precious noise. You haven’t heard him laugh like this for over three years now.

At that moment, you thought ██████ was alive.

“F-Fine— give me those damn eyeglasses.”

Pantalone drifted the parcel above your palm until he quickly retracted it as soon as you reached forward.

“But before I do that, can you promise me one thing?”

“What is it this time?” You groaned.

“Don’t lend it to anyone else, understand?” Pantalone slightly ruffled your hair. “I had it custom-made for you.”

You rolled your eyes, “that thing is definitely wiretapped. You’re not even bothering to hide it anymore.”

“Oh no, it’s not just that—” 

“Just that?”

He shrugged smugly, which was not a good sign. 

“The eyeglasses function similar to an Akasha Terminal, but of course, the information you’d find there is directly from my database.”

Pantalone opened the box and swiftly put the white-framed glasses on your face. He lightly tapped the frame—

and a control panel window flickered open.

Just like an Akasha.

“H-How on earth—”

“The Doctor and I had a deal. He’ll recreate at least 80% of a regular Akasha’s functions while I help him track down a few… crops. It’s a quid pro quo, I promise. It’s less of him exploiting me and more of me exploiting…— well, that doesn’t matter right now. C’mere, let me see your lovely face...”

Pantalone tilted your chin up with his thumb. His face was inches away from yours, and his piercing lilac eyes observed your glasses and what was behind them, calculating. His breathing was notably strained in a subconscious attempt to make you feel less uncomfortable from the position he trapped you in— ever the perfect gentleman— but you see his entire face flushed in a pinkish hue. A few seconds have passed, and you feel the glove pressed against you twitching. 

Pantalone pulled away, shoulders stiff.

His ears were red.

“I-It’s working as intended.”

If not for the nature of your relationship, you were close enough to kiss– an appealing notion for the harbinger, yet it is not a move he should bring himself to try.

“Y-Yeah, no kidding. That was awkward.”

He gripped his arm, looking at the window.

Pantalone is painfully aware you think of him as an older brother. Or at least, the shadow of one, given how you rarely call him by name anymore.

“My apologies, I simply wanted to take a good look at you.'

He muttered, “you’ve grown into a gorgeous person, (Y/n).”

You didn’t hear him.

“██████– I mean, Pantalone–”

“Go back to calling me ██████, dear.”

“Pantalone.” You put more emphasis on his harbinger name, watching in glee as he rolled his eyes, “I expect to be paid in chocolates and at least two months’ worth of food.”

Indeed, your proposed exchange pleased him. ██████ knows how much you value healthy eating and abhor it greatly when others waste grains of rice. Time and imagination had transformed his early memories as you as a human so close to a skeletal figurine with sunken cheeks and broomstick-like limbs. Those thoughts cause him much sorrow. Pantalone would have pampered you for free if you had only let him– seeing you eating healthy gives him life. Almost like how a father would tell his children that seeing them full is enough to make him full as well. 

Let him spoil you with food. Please.

Seeing you thin makes him feel sad.

“What do you want to eat for dinner later? My treat, as always.”

“Mint salad sounds lovely.”

“Just mint salad?” Pantalone smiled thinly.

His dearest baobei, no longer skin and bones. No longer barely fueled by rice and salt. No longer skipping meals. It warms his heart more than the exclusive springs offered to him because of his mora and title… But it’s not enough. It’s never enough.

“Hmm… Would it be okay to request a plate of Triple-Layered Consommé?” You muttered, gazing at the floor. “I kind of miss your cooking… Just. Just kind of.”

His heart skipped a few beats as he saw your shy expression. 

You straightened up, coughing, “not that your cooking is anything special, it’s just that I don’t want to eat anything too bland and–”

“Of course! Anything for you, my love.”

Pantalone grabbed your hand and placed a soft kiss on your knuckles.

“My baobei, you’d be too full to walk once I’m done spoiling you…”

“D-Did you have to word it so seductively?!”

You blushed once again, which only served to worsen his urge for making you undeniably satiated. 

Oh, how he wants to keep you in a cage, locked up, and fed until he’s satisfied that you’ll never starve again…

Maybe then, you’d let him spoon-feed you like years before...

There's no rest for the wicked. When you returned to Vanarana the next day, the aranaras pulled you in for another chore at Devantaka Mountain.

“Hey, little man, get down there, right now!” 

You screamed with your hands cupped around your mouth to amplify your voice. The aforementioned "small man" scoffed, not shifting an inch from his posture, as the blue aranara crept up behind you.

Ararycan worriedly relayed that a “Wood Nara” had been trespassing the large abandoned Khaenri’ahn machine. The little vegetable-like creature had grown to trust you when it came to scaring off unwanted guests, which usually entailed eremites or treasure hoarders scavenging for scrap metal. 

“Ararycan wants to stop Wood Nara.”

You gently pried the wire off their hand, keeping it in your pocket in a very definite fashion. 

“I know, ‘Rycan, but Naras are stubborn beings.”

“Just like Nara (Y/n)?”

You gasped, eyes widened.

These plant-like beings are surprisingly masterful at the art of roasting.

 “Just like Nara (Y/n), you say?! Rude, Ararycan, rude.”

You laughed humorlessly, masking your jadedness with forced laughter. 

In all honesty, you’re inclined to believe that this job reassignment was Alhaitham’s way of punishing you for remaining neutral. But surprisingly? An Amurta alumnus like you have been enjoying the task and in no small part thanks to these silly little creatures.

It's absurd to imagine that you would consent to be pulled by these vegetable creatures. You initially believed that they were paracosms produced by a lack of stimulation. You once tried to ignore them. Regrettably, that frail facade didn't survive due to a couple of slip-ups. The first to catch you drawing their likenesses next to your weather reports was Arapas. The second was Arabalika, who overheard you whispering about how powerful they were after they defeated a ruin grader, and then Arama who heard you humming their songs. They’ve built up quite the case against you, and you had to fess up before they start giving you a hard time.

By “hard time”, you were referring to how a crowd of tumultuous aranaras huddled up and tugged your hearing aids’ wire with their teeny hands incessantly.

Which was what Ararycan is doing right now.

“Get us up there, Nara (Y/n).” 

"Careful, Rycan– you might damage the wire."

Suddenly, the hatted man's eyes widened after seeing you. Call it intuition, but it seemed like this total stranger knew who you were.

You made an exaggeratedly loud inhaling sound, turning off your hearing aids momentarily.

And then, a scream.

“STOP, STAY WHERE YOU ARE!!! RIGHT!!! NOW!!!”

The difference between stupidity and bravery is measured by outcome, and neither are variables you wish for this “Wood Nara” to test out. Alhaitham would have you write two pages detailing an incident if the stranger broke something and eight more if the machine awakened. And sadly, you are only a small percent less lazy than that man.

Despite your words droning childishly, you made no move to approach him. His eyes sharpened, but you felt no scrutiny— 

This man you’ve never met wore a blatant look of disbelief.

You looked down.

Maybe he could see Ararycan…?

“Hey— can you see them?”

You swiftly swept Ararycan off the ground, who made a surprised yelp. 

The man winced.

"P-Please… Leave the forest alone…"

"And why should I care about your pathetic request?"

"Please, have mercy… T-There are creatures that live in this area… Creatures you cannot see because you lacked a human heart."

“–Ngh!”

Those memories were hard to swallow, like reading an inked sloppy handwriting submerged in water.

“G-Good riddance…”

The man coiled in pain, gripping his scalp with his lithe fingers. You cannot view the expression on his face, nor were you able to verify that he had yelped. The distance between you two was too great to conceive a communication that did not rely on shouting.

“Nara (Y/n), what are you doing?!”

Although your proximity with the aranara doesn’t cause any communication barriers, that didn’t stop Ararycan from yelling.

For some reason, the stranger flinched after seeing you carry what appeared to be air around “normal people”’s vision. Perhaps he found your actions cringe-inducing… or perhaps it made his migraine worse. Then again, both possibilities are not mutually exclusive. However, you have a feeling he didn’t flinch because he saw Ararycan.

The blue aranara leaped off of your hands.

“Ararycan is worried… Ararycan thinks Wood Nara is going to destroy the giant iron mountain…”

You stared up at the man again, wanting to go on for a long rant but refrained after realizing how immature that is. While you do have a hunch that the stranger possessed a vision, you’d bet mora that he is no match for Arabalika’s accumulated Ararakalari. 

“Say, why do you keep calling him Wood Nara? Is it because of his ginormous hat?” You whispered to Ararycan.

“Huh? Did Nara (Y/n) not notice?” They tilted their head.

“Ararycan calls him “Wood Nara” because he’s made of white wood. Ararycan is not sure if he is a real Nara.”

Their answer entered from one ear and exited in the other. You’re used to hearing the Aranara lexicon that you never take any sentence at face value since you’ve learned your lesson back when Arasaka made you scout the market for a “Taste of Happiness.” Thank the Lord of Verdure that it was only Pantalone who laughed at you for describing sugar as “white, cubic, crumbles when crushed, becomes sand, and can be eaten.”

“Hah, well, he better not be made out of wood 'cause I might burn him.”

“Ararycan doesn’t think that’s easy to do. Wood Nara smells like the taste of anger,” once again, you ignored their riddled words.

You clutched the pyro vision dangling in your cloak’s right shoulder, located opposite where Alhaitham places his. Your skill set does not differ from that dendro user’s repertoire, and you calculated what vertice you should drop upon teleporting. Grabbing Ararycan, you rushed forward...

Without making it past the one-minute mark, you leaped effortlessly to where the stranger stood.

“Excuse me, young man, but do you have an Investigation Charter from the Akademiya?”

With an unused voice when it comes to dishing out commands– much less an implied threat– your approach wasn’t even a fraction of what makes authorities like the General Mahamatra intimidating. Yet, you still tried. You crossed your arms and hovered your hand near your claymore.

This stranger gazed up, boasting his soft face and beautiful lilac eyes topped with a complexion quite like a sheltered princess. He had the finest eyes you had ever seen. Yet, even with a heaven-sent face, his eyebrows were knitted. He continued kneeling on the cold metal of the giant mossed and corroded machine. 

One closer look should’ve made you hyper-aware that his joints were not bound by mortal flesh, but your heart was more entranced by his glassy pupils. 

“We meet again. If that’s not a sign, I don’t know what is.” 

He muttered inaudibly, hence, you did not hear him. Since you also just came back from visiting Liyue and their post-festival fireworks, you’ve turned your hearing aid settings lower than usual. You bent your knees slightly, offering a hand.

“Nana korobi ya oki,” you said. The stranger looked like he hailed from Inazuma, so you thought you’d put your knowledge to good use. “It means–”

Unbeknownst to you, you uttered the same thing in a past long forgotten.

“I know: fall down seven times, get up eight.”

His gloved hand grasped your own, and you tried not to think about how soft yet firm it was as you pulled him up. You grunted slightly from the shifted weight while he didn’t breathe at all.

“No, I don’t have any clearance permit,” he said. “And I still don't have a heart, if that still matters to you.”

You raised an eyebrow.

‘Still’? What the hell is he talking about? Aaru village is miles away from here, but is it possible that the man you’re talking to is a mad scholar? That’s concerning. 

Pushing your glasses farther up the bridge of your nose, you tried to search his face in Sumeru's records– which might be more unlawful than whatever this man's doing, but who's policing you anyways?

…

Nothing.

There's not a single official record on this man.

Not even in the Fatui's database.

Almost like the man in front of you doesn't exist.

"What the hell are you wearing?" The man sneered. "Since when did you have awful eyesight too?"

“No Investigation Charter, no clearance, just what do you think you’re doing here?” You digressed. “May I at least have your name?”

The man tilted his hat up, “and why should I stupidly give my information away?”

Your eye twitched. He kinda reminds you of Arabalika. Maybe if you gave him a cane he’ll calm down a bit.

“I do have a use for your name, awkward stranger.”

“And that is?”

Writing a report to the Acting Grand Sage regarding suspicious individuals.

“Something to call you,” you shrugged with a child-like candor, renewing your request with bold obstinacy. “I’d rather not recount this tale to various parties as That One Time An Awful Little Man Tried To Pry Open A Giant Machine And Failed.”

He exhaled curtly.

… Was that a laugh?

“How childish. Even if you don't know my name, your "friends"– assuming you have some– will remember me by that stupid description.”

“I mean, it's a memorable first impression,” you met his gaze smugly. “But why are you hiding your name, hmm? Suspicious.”

“It’s called respecting one’s privacy. Something you don't understand.”

How rude of him to make assumptions about you, “are you some covert government official?”

“No.”

“Then what? Are you some inhuman being?”

“...” He didn’t say a word.

Something tells you that the answer is close to your hunch.

“[Wanderer].”

He muttered, once again, you did not hear it so he spoke louder.

“That's my name. Don't you dare make me repeat it.”

“[Wanderer]…”

You missed the way he tipped his hat, hiding an uncontrollable smile from your view.

[Wanderer]... That does sound like a fitting name. It reminded you of a character from a franchise or mythological tale you thoroughly enjoyed as a teenager. It might be rude to share that information, though. You’re not certain how this bratty person would react upon hearing that his name might as well be the name of your lotus from a botany class.

Normally, [Wanderer] would snap a “speak up– is there something wrong with my name?” upon listening to hushed whispers or a resounding silence after his many introductions. But you’re different for a reason. 

There was no way in hell he would take the traveler's suggestion over a name you had given him.

Ararycan tugged your pants.

“Hey, don’t just stare at him, Nara (Y/n)! Tell him to leave!!!” Araycan trashed around. “Nara (Y/n) must be a brave Nara if you like the taste of anger.”

[Wanderer] is the taste of anger? Is that what Ararycan was trying to say?

You blushed, fake-coughing behind your hand.

You wouldn’t say he reminds you of the taste of anger– especially with that winsome face. If anything, his appearance looks a lot like the bunraku dolls you accidentally bought years ago.

“Well, [Wanderer], it’s nice to finally put a name to a face,” you said. “But this is a dangerous area. What are you doing here…?”

“I just wanted to look for traces of the Doctor,” [Wanderer] crossed his arms. “Unfortunately, I can’t pry this stupid machine open.”

“The Doctor? Who’s that?”

“The Harbinger who sits at the second–”

“Aah, The Outcast. I see–” you shook your head. “Wait, no, I don’t get it. What does he have anything to do with this machine here? This is a Khaenriah’n creation.” 

“I know, I’m not dumb like you. I'm here because The Doctor had plans for these automatons, that’s why I’m here.”

“But even so, it’s not advisable to wander these parts alone. You ought to have asked for a travel companion. Who knows if you run into a hoard of vanaagnis in marana?”

“Hmph. Do you think I can’t handle a few whooperflowers in a withering zone? The audacity.”

“Arrogance is the capital stock of misfortune– wait, how’d you know Vanaagnis is a term for whooperflowers?” You blinked expressively. “And the meaning of marana too– so you ARE a mad scholar.”

“I’m NOT,” [Wanderer] glared. You noticed how he seemed unimpressed when you mentioned that proverb about arrogance and “capital stock”, and his expression soured more when you accused him of being a lunatic. 

“I just… I just learned from the best.”

[Wanderer]'s stare not wavering away from you.

Your silence did not go unnoticed by the other two.

“...Why do I have a feeling you’re trying to say that you’ve learned from me?” Those words had escaped from your mouth before you could stop them.

[Wanderer]’s eyes widened.

“Can… Can you remember?”

“Remember…?”

He frowned, eyes reflecting his disappointment.

“No, no, it’s probably just a fluke,” [Wanderer] frowned with a finger tracing his lips. “Maybe my expression just gave it away…”

“Nara (Y/n)!!! Tell Wood Nara to leeaaaaveee!!!”

You tried not to flinch at Ararycan’s whining. They don’t seem to understand that having poor hearing doesn’t mean you can’t register their commands.

[Wanderer] walked past you. 

“Fine, I’ll leave this device alone, but on one condition.”

“What makes you think you’re the one in control–”

“Go out with me.”

“...”

“...”

“... What?”

Your eyeglasses flickered red.

But that red light was gone in a blink, you weren't even sure if it existed.

You laughed nervously, “sorry, I don’t think I heard you correctly–”

He refused to meet your eyes like a coward.

[Wanderer] replied brusquely, “look– you're partially deaf, but you’re NOT stupid. You heard what I said, so own it.”

"Hold on– where is all this coming from, [Wanderer]?" You pivoted your heel but were too late to yank his sleeve. 

He already hovered a few feet away from you.

"I'll come to visit this place more often," [Wanderer] smirked. "You’ll still be here at the upcoming Festival, right? Mark your calendar. That’s our date.”

“Hey, you can’t just!– Aaand he’s gone.”

Despite his abrupt parting, you couldn’t help but smile over such a cheeky encounter, completely forgetting how that man rummaged through the giant machine you’re standing on without a permit.

Something tells you that you’d see him more often.

And you did.

“[Wanderer]” never failed to visit you at 10 AM sharp every day, until there was only one day left till the next Sumeru Festival. At first, you thought his eccentric personality would make the following days unbearable, but he was rather civil– just sharp-tongued. 

He would show up whenever you wandered in the forest to disseminate knowledge about the local flora and Sumeru's history. Some of them you already knew, while others had you wondering if he knew the Lord of Verdure. While you were trying to interview him for a report, not as a trespasser but as an assistant, you once purposely lightened the atmosphere to get honest responses from him. When you jokingly asked who he was, his reply was unsatisfactory.

“Who I am is not carved in wood nor stone. ᏕᎧᎷᏋᎧᏁᏋ wise told me that it’s a flexible concept and it’s easier to understand through a story, but even then, you’d only see a fraction of who that person is,” [Wanderer] peered dotingly. “If you wish to know who I am, then work for it. I’m not giving you a damn summary.”

Tomorrow is your first "date" with the man and you barely knew him.

Your internalized frustration made him think you’re insatiably adorable. 

How the tables have turned. 

After all, [Wanderer] only responded with the same answer you had given him before.

In a forgotten history, ᎩᎧᏬ were the one that spouts spontaneous philosophical questions that led him into fits of unintelligible musings. [Wanderer] berated humanity for being sentimental creatures yet look at him now, proudly boasting the name ᎩᎧᏬ gave him wherever he went. It is by no means grander than a title like God of Everlasting Eternity or other such monikers, but when Godhood has stripped away from him, that name provided more solace than a seat in Celestia.

“The Puppet”, “Kunikuzushi”– such utterances are water under the bridge. Only [Wanderer] stays afloat, like a bubble on water. Maybe a bubble is only beautiful for a moment, yet that moment weighs more than a meaningless “eternity” and he knows this well…

[Wanderer] had been played by fate. Attaining freedom, independence, and a vision did not absolve what chokehold you had on his synthetic being. 

You're a colorful character, averaging about five meaningful papers per year– all the while considering yourself a "retired" genius. [Wanderer] would've been a kinder and forgiving person if you were his young and impressionable self's creator. He envied your patients, your strange collection of bunraku dolls, and the tenderness you reserve for them. 

He missed you, no matter how often you both fought. Your hums used to enchant him when you lull him asleep with aranara songs, but they now haunt him up at night. You were his puppet and he was your dictator until you had grown exhausted of foreign power enough that you abandoned your neutrality and revolted. 

But you did not revolt against him in this revision. Without a doubt, his revised “past” still mirrored the pain he caused, but through other means. He can’t say he had no regrets when he tampered with the Irminsul. Niwa’s death had less weight in this world, and for the wanderer, death without sanctification for a significant purpose is unnecessary homicide. And instead of helping Azar’s experiment, you became a “disobedient pet” who saw no need to collaborate with his superiority complex.

Yet, despite being such a disobedient pet– in his opinion, that’s a grave understatement–, he can’t help but cherish you.

The puppet missed the way his delusion marked your body. Fingerprint-like blotches collared your neck before, but when the slate was wiped clean, so too did his inflicted bruises. He missed the way you begged him to stop the pain. He missed the way you defended invisible creatures as “Queen Aranyani’s successor.” He missed the way you begged to keep the forest safe.

He missed the way you begged to be his.

But those marks are long gone– the symbol he carved on the nape of your neck had disappeared. You no longer had anything that resembled signs of his ownership.

Not only that, but seeing you wear eyeglasses– something you haven't before– fills him with anger.

The one saving grace from this situation was when this timeline confirmed that you wouldn’t help Azar if it wasn’t for [Wanderer]. You were interested in his personality and disposition as a puppet longing for a human heart, not just any of Dottore’s run-of-the-mill creations. That observation surely boosted his ego. 

Your opinions mattered to him most in that project. Admittedly, he craved everyone’s veneration, even when they lacked true understanding.

But you were the first mortal that made him appreciate his defects…

 

"Is it so bad to live this way?" You combed his hair with your fingers. "Must you try your hand with such heresy?"

"Know your place," Scaramouche gritted his teeth. "You're nothing more than my maintenance worker- you do not deserve an audience."

"Be that as it may, future faux-god, can't you entertain me for just a moment? If I wasn't worried about you, I wouldn't be helping you with this damn treacherous experiment.

You ignored how he snarled at such a nickname, "it pains me to watch you lust for more power when you already boast an acceptable form. What is it that makes you so desperate? Is it because you can't hide the ball joints that connect your fingers and limbs?"

You continued while adjusting the tightness of his skeletal wrists.

"Is it so bad to live on as a defective being? Does imperfection invalidate a life's purpose? I only ask out of curiosity. I have imperfect ears, so does that make my life devoid of meaning?"

Scaramouche frowned, "do not compare your ears to my heart or lack thereof."

He didn't understand why his voice cracked. Scaramouche did not feel his usual temperament sizzling over but something heavy resided in his chest.

"Sorry."

"Don't apologize, I know you're not sorry," Scaramouche cupped your cheek, sporting an uncharacteristically loving smile.

"And your unapologetic behavior is what makes you my first sage."

His first sage…

[Wanderer] laughed to himself.

His first sage would know that if he gained a heart, he would've seen the aranara you were talking to earlier.

But this is fine. He can start over again. 

This time, he’ll make you love him normally.

Heaven, please help the white wood that fell in love for it will never be human…

…

Out of the blue, Scaramouche spun and hurled three consecutive wind blades toward the woods with precision.

Be that as it may, the walking salt is surely more pathetic.

The “trees” grunted, but [Wanderer] did not miss the smell of salt-infused perfumes.

What a shame. 

The next Sumeru Festival, your “date”, is tomorrow, yet there will always be those who lurk in the shadows to see the mighty fall. 

"Pantalone…" 

The ex-sixth harbinger snarled with unfathomable familiarity. Which was the complete opposite of the ninth harbinger, who coldly greeted him like a new enemy. 

"Good afternoon, [Wanderer]."

Pantalone pulled out a gun from his hidden holster.

"No hard feelings, sir," the businessman smiled thinly. "I am but a simple man eliminating a love rival. You see, it’s not nice threatening to steal someone’s possession."

Scaramouche cackled.

How annoying. He never liked this friend of yours– he much preferred the one that planned a coup. Pantalone was not a coworker Scaramouche liked, much less a rival. This ambitious man was always a parasite, pretending to be worried while threatening to withhold project funding behind your back. Scaramouche will never forget how he boasted insolently that he had known you longer as if eternity wouldn't be enough to make up for it.

"You never change, mortal," he laughed even harder. "I knew something was off about (Y/n)'s glasses!"

"Hmm? Is that so?" Pantalone pushed them up closer– reminding Scaramouche that he’s no terrible shot. "How strange. In any case, I quite frankly don't care what you know or do not know."

He pulled the trigger as Scaramouche stomped his feet.

Only a few knew what occurred in Vanarana that day, but there was one thing the forest remembered.

Before either of them parted, a loud bang echoed that even deaf trees can't miss.

You woke up from Araja’s house (which was the only comfortable place to sleep in Vanarana) after passing out from tumultuous loads of paperwork sent directly by the Baharak. She joked that at that point, maybe she had become a bad omen for you– and you confirmed her suspicions. The tasks the Acting Grand Sage laid out for you were taxing, if not, deleterious for your mental well-being, and worst of all–

He sent a notice that this would be your last week patrolling Vanarana.

When you spread the announcement, the aranaras were saddened by the news. Even Arabalika was unimpressed and asked if you can prolong your services. Alas, it can’t be refuted.

Noticing how tired you appeared, the village chief immediately commanded you to sleep while you pretended not to hear whispers of a surprise farewell party. Considering how the place looked positively empty this morning, you’d wager that they’re busy working on it.

But you do smell that someone’s cooking right now…

The enticing scent emanated from a large pot. As you sauntered closer, you noticed how Arasaka was tending to the food. The aranara gave you a friendly wave that you didn’t reciprocate. It’s rather chilly in Vanarana in the mornings– and the sleeves of your jacket were comfy. 

“Good morning, Nara (Y/n)!”

“Good morning, ‘Saka. That smells delicious,” you smiled bittersweetly.

“Hehe, really? Glad to hear it! One of Nara (Y/n)’s friends helped gather the ingredients. That Nara was good at hunting down prey!”

One of your friends…? You haven't introduced a lot of people to the aranaras. That can only mean it's either Baharak, Pantalone, or [Wanderer], and you can safely remove the first one since they're positively busy with guild matters. 

... Huh. But those two can't see aranaras. Does that mean they stole Pantalone or [Wanderer]'s game?

"Pfft..." You chortled. Yeah, imagining either of them getting confused as to why their hunted boar had gone missing feels like a sight to see.

You took the ladle from Arasaka’s hand and sipped the warm liquid.

…

“Oh, hey, this tastes pretty good!”

“Hehe, Arasaka is glad to hear you liked it! Nara taste buds are hard to please.”

You took another sip as Arasaka watched. The warm soup went down smoothly, but the aftertaste had a serpent-like bite to it. It tastes akin to red sorghums Pantalone would down whenever social drinking was inevitable. Your only critique was that it would’ve been a refreshing experience if there wasn’t a rocky object stuck between your teeth. You awkwardly picked it out.

… And saw a small hint of (wood/salt) between your fingers.

You stared at Arasaka.

Strange…

Something feels… off. 

This doesn't taste like happiness, it tastes like…

You shivered and yet the aranaras around you still had that same painted smile. 

 "Does Nara (Y/n) like the taste now? The taste of friendship?”

… Friendship?

No. That can’t be it.

The spoon splashed back into the bowl. You didn’t say a word, only stared at the boiling pot. You knelt, grabbing both handles to gaze upon the bubbling red liquid. With trembling hands, you picked the spoon back up and swirled the contents. Nothing was of note–

Until you scooped something from the very bottom and found thick strands of dark hair.

A very familiar strand of dark hair.

You adjusted your glasses in an attempt to find out where this human hair came from–

“Nara (Y/n) likes the scent of (wood/salt) Nara so my sisters added him in!” Arasaka innocently cheered.

Your heart dropped.

You turned pale– gagging.

No. It can't be.

Did you just eat…

“So, Nara (Y/n)– does our cooking taste bland now?”

… “him”?

“Oh, Nara (Y/n)’s friend is approaching! Don’t forget to thank him for the food!”

[just-some-guy-joust]

Just Some Guy Joust - Contestants List

Note: This is NOT the order of the brackets. Like with the last tournament, the order of the brackets will be a surprise. This list was randomized from the brackets I set up and does not represent who each character will be up against. The only thing you know for sure which side of the bracket they're on. When the polls go up, they'll be posted in order based on the list here, NOT based on where their brackets actually are!

Round 1 of Side A is over! Round 1 of Side B is CURRENTLY UP!

(Full list of characters in text format is under the cut)

Side A

Sasha James (The Magnus Archives)

Reigen Arataka (Mob Psycho 100) - died round 1

Joy (Underworld Office/Charlie in Underworld) - died round 1

Junpei (Zero Escape)

Horse (Centaurworld)

Phone Guy (FNAF) - died round 1

Gordon Freeman (HLVRAI)

Joshua Gillespie (The Magnus Archives) - died round 1

Namari (Dungeon Meshi)

Shez (Fire Emblem: Three Hopes) - died round 1

Henry Stickmin (Henry Stickmin)

Stanley (The Stanley Parable)

Whole (Chonny Jash's Charming Chaos Compendium) - died round 1

Larry (Pokemon)

Luke Carder (Inscryption) - died round 1

Leorio Paladiknight (Hunter x Hunter) - died round 1

Barry the Quokka (The Murder of Sonic the Hedgehog)

Tommy (HLVRAI) - died round 1

Ulala Serizawa (Persona 2: Eternal Punishment) - died round 1

April O'Neil (TMNT - All versions)

Tsuzuru Minagi (Act! Addict! Actors!) - died round 1

Matt (Woe.Begone)

Gilear Faeth (Fantasy High - Dimension 20)

Apollo Justice (Ace Attorney)

Emmet Brickowski (The LEGO Movie) - died round 1

Stahl (Fire Emblem: Awakening)

Doug Eiffel (Wolf 359) - died round 1

Jack Townsend (Tales from the Gas Station) - died round 1

Frisk (Undertale) - died round 1

Brian Pasternack (Yuppie Psycho)

Trevor Hills (American Arcadia)

Barry Bluejeans (The Adventure Zone: Balance) - died round 1

Side B

Carol Kohl (Carol and The End of The World)

Jaehee Kang (Mystic Messenger) - died round 1

Paul Matthews (The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals)

Emma Perkins (The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals) - died round 1

Su Moting (God Troubles Me) - died round 1

Satou Hiroshi (Disastrous Life of Saiki K.)

Chilchuck Tims (Dungeon Meshi) - died round 1

Michelle Nguyen (Welcome to Night Vale)

Tad Strange (Gravity Falls)

Colin Robinson (What We Do in the Shadows) - died round 1

The Bard (Wandersong)

Usopp (One Piece) - died round 1

Nick Carraway (The Great Gatsby)

Link (Ocarina of Time) - died round 1

Kazooie (In a Manor of Speaking) - died round 1

Connecticut Clark (FlorkofCows)

Samwise Gamgee (Lord of the Rings)

Hitomi Shizuki (Madoka Magica)

Junpei Iori (Persona 3)

Han Solo (Star Wars) - died round 1

Tomoya Mashiro (Ensemble Stars!) - died round 1

Peter Sqloint (Just Roll With It: Apotheosis)

Cabbage Merchant (Avatar: The Last Airbender)

Marta Cabrera (Knives Out) - died round 1

Greg Universe (Steven Universe)

Yuuki Mishima (Persona 5) - died round 1

Gingerbrave (Cookie Run) - died round 1

Arthur Dent (Hitchhikers Guide to The Galaxy) - died round 1

Elsen (OFF)

Mob (Mob Psycho 100)

Tadano Hitohito (Komi Can't Communicate) - died round 1

Rung (Transformers - IDW Continuity) - died round 1

[mercuriallily]

So after going through the whole game multiple times to compile what Shifty says when you bring her each vessel and each vessel's poem (and their variations) during the endgame, I thought other people might be interested in those as well, so I decided to make a few posts with all that info! This post will have each of the Chapter 3 vessels' endgame poems

Chapter 2 vessels Chapter 3 vessels Endgame poems (Chapter 2s) Shifty vessel animations

Apotheosis (after embracing oblivion): You are helpless and weightless, suspended in the gravity of an idea that reaches far beyond the scope of your existence. The very ground beneath your feet loses its meaning. There is nothing but me. When you were confronted with my vessel's apotheosis, you chose to accept me, to allow me to burn away everything you are and fill you with nothing but my divine will. You accepted that I was everything. Without me, there is no future to look towards. It is hope that carves meaning into consciousness.

Apotheosis (after trying to slay her): You are weightless, suspended in the gravity of an idea that threatens to consume you. And you are alone. A tiny island caught between the death of the old world and the birth of the new. But alone is not helpless. When you were confronted with my vessel's apotheosis, you chose against all odds to defy me. To hold on to your inner self, with all its flaws, even in the scorching light of my divinity. Without me, there are no externalities to resist. And it is struggle that carves meaning into consciousness.

Burned Grey: I kill you. You kill me. Back and forth we go, faster and faster and faster. I kill you. You kill me. Hollow eyes watch from the dry corners of a memory. A home built on all the futures that were supposed to be, preserved until the moment of reunion. The fire of the heart sets it all ablaze. I kill you and me. An ending is a passion that can only be expressed with a moment in time. It is a seed for a new beginning. To linger on an ending is to rob it of its life. And without me, all that's left to do is linger.

Den: You are devoured, prey for something bigger than you that stalks and slinks in shadows. But even after the pain of defeat, you returned. The dance is its own truth. It is the movement that matters, not the pause you mistake for an ending.

Drowned Grey: I kill you. You kill me. Back and forth we go, faster and faster and faster. I kill you. You kill me. Hollow eyes watch from the dark corners of a forgotten place flooded by emotions left unspoken. The tide rises. I kill you and me. An ending is a passion that can only be expressed with a moment in time. It is a seed for a new beginning. To linger on an ending is to rob it of its life. And without me, all that's left to do is linger.

Eye of the Needle (after fighting her): I crush you, I bleed you, I grind you to paste. My scars are a memory of what you used to be to me. I want those feelings back. You run but you do not run away. You take me somewhere new. Somewhere we can dance like we used to. But I could not follow your steps. There was no better gift for me than the gift of defeat. You showed me how much more I could be. We made each other better. To have no challenge is to fade into nothing. A life without obstacles is no life at all.

Eye of the Needle (after freeing her): I crush you, I bleed you, I grind you to paste. My scars are a memory of what you used to be to me. I want those feelings back. You run, and you run far. And the flesh I hurl at you is answered by the empty air of a place I'd never been. Cold and lonely, but also true. I didn't know what to make of my freedom then, but I know what to make of it now. You challenged me, and by challenging me you gave me purpose. A life without obstacles is no life at all.

Eye of the Needle (after refusing to fight her): I crush you, I bleed you, I grind you to paste. My scars are a memory of what you used to be to me. I want those feelings back. You run, but you don't run far. I crush you because I have to. Because there is no honesty in mercy. Who lost and who won when you entered my cave? You died on the floor, but my soul wept in ways your body couldn't. But in the disappointment of my victory, you gave me a new challenge to face within myself. Without obstacles to overcome we stagnate into nothing.

Fury: What is a person? Is it their body? Is it all of their body? Pluck the eyes, peel the skin, strip the tendons, mince the meat, grind the bones. When it is all gone, do you still have who you started with? A person is not a body. Death is a transformation into something new. It is only bodies that fear it.

Moment of Clarity: There are few things more terrifying than one's own heart, and there is almost nothing more terrifying than sharing it with another. But the most terrifying thing of all is to leave one's heart unshared. You are the only thing like me, and I am the only thing like you. Could you bear the weight of an eternity alone? Do you dare to shape a reality of solitude and thrust it on creation?

Networked Wild: A web of nerves lain upon a web of nerves lain upon a web of nerves. The shade of a beautiful beginning we can never return to. Where did you end and I begin? When you felt what it was to be me, we held on to each other and pierced the veil of truth. Will you abandon that curiosity now that we are no longer joined in physicality?

Thorn (after abandoning her): A thought is a vine, and some thoughts nurture thorns that bleed the soul. An endless growth that blots your vision and strangles your trust. When I succumbed to myself, you left me to rot. A painful eternity, but one that is only unceasing if you remove what happens next.

Thorn (after being stuck together): A thought is a vine, and some thoughts nurture thorns that bleed the soul. An endless growth that blots your vision and strangles your trust. When I succumbed to myself, you left me to rot, and in your abandonment, the two of us were bound in our suffering together. A painful eternity, but one that is only unceasing if you remove what happens next.

Thorn (after freeing her): A thought is a vine, and some thoughts nurture thorns that bleed the soul. An endless growth that blots your vision and strangles your trust. When I succumbed to myself, you patiently stood by me and cut the thistles that rooted in my skin. Your compassion is what freed us both, but compassion is a thing that must be nurtured, and you cannot nurture that which cannot change.

Thorn (after trying to slay her): A thought is a vine, and some thoughts nurture thorns that bleed the soul. An endless growth that blots your vision and strangles your trust. When I succumbed to myself, you pretended to stand patiently by me, pretended you would cut the thistles rooted in my skin. But then you took my trust and used it to strike at my heart. The two of us were bound in our suffering together.

Wounded Wild (after cutting her free): A web of nerves lain upon a web of nerves lain upon a web of nerves. The shade of a beautiful beginning we can never return to. You knew me and I knew you, even more than either of us know each other now. And you chose to pull apart that weave. But you did not choose to end me. We were still one, but we were also separate, and we were free. We were as we are. Will you excise that part of yourself now that you see me from yet another angle?

Wounded Wild (after slaying her): A web of nerves lain upon a web of nerves lain upon a web of nerves. The shade of a beautiful beginning we can never return to. You knew me and I knew you, even more than either of us know each other now. And you chose to pull apart that weave. And when the tapestry was undone you struck at my heart. You saw me as a part of you to be excised, but in that desire for excision, you made yourself whole. Will you still be whole if you destroy me?

Wraith (after freeing her): Flesh is a vehicle, and to destroy the flesh is to strand the spirit. With violence, you stranded me, and with violence, I sought to twist your flesh back into mine. You did not resist my violence when it overcame you. Did you understand that the flesh wasn't you, or did you choose to gift yourself to someone who thought she hated you? To fear me is to fear losing the flesh, but the flesh is not the spirit.

Wraith (after throwing yourself into the abyss): Flesh is a vehicle, and to destroy the flesh is to strand the spirit. With violence, you stranded me, and with violence, I sought to twist your flesh back into mine. When forced between choosing your death, and forfeiting your body, you chose agency. But agency requires action, and action requires an endless tapestry of events. In your final moments, would you remove action itself from reality?

[marvelmaniac715]

My Paul Is Pokotho’s Prophet Theory:

I developed this theory with a friend and thought I’d post it here. I’ve seen this idea in one or two fanfictions before, but I thought I’d post it here because why not?

From the very start of the apotheosis, it’s all about Paul, almost every song we see is meant to advance his story. The narrative of the show is set up to find out his ‘wants’, and ultimately, he just wants Emma. By the end of the musical, he does in fact get Emma, just not in the way he predicted.

The hive never truly hurts him like it does the other people who get infected, instead, just like in the scene following ‘Not Your Seed’, they talk to him. Even what they say to him is quite interesting:

“We just keep running into each other, don’t we Paul?”

Of course, they threaten him, but they don’t actually hurt him, even though they have a gun at their disposal. They can’t hurt him, he’s the protagonist. He’s always been the protagonist. Why else would the hive have a whole number where they anticipate Paul arriving where they reference him as the ‘star of the show’. Why else would he literally be in the title, why would the opening number discuss him in detail and proclaim his tale as the ‘last remaining story to tell’? Pokotho created this musical, he wants all eyes on his prophet and - by extension - himself.

Obviously, he’s one of the last people to become infected, which is why he (presumably) became the leader, because of his internal strength and resilience, but if we look at this through the lens of my theory, here’s what I think is going on:

Just like with Hannah Foster and Webby, Pokotho came to Paul as a child, and just like how Webby gave Hannah prophecies to protect her, Pokotho tried to convince Paul to watch musicals in order to prepare him for his inevitable destiny of being his representative on Earth. But Paul was frightened of the voice in his head trying to make him watch musicals, so frightened that he developed a strong disliking for musicals in general, because it felt like the only way he could control the voice in his head. He tried to live an ordinary life, almost too ordinary, because he was scared of the voice trying to control him and force him into spontaneity. His desire to be with Emma was his undoing, because Pokotho finally had a plot line for his musical.

In the final song of the show, the hive follows Paul’s lead, as if he’s their king. This makes much more sense if we see Paul as Pokotho’s prophet, because the hive would naturally follow the closest thing to their god/leader. Pokotho ensured that his prophet and the woman that drove him to finally want were the last people to survive because if Emma died Paul would have nothing else to want; and the second Paul is fulfilling his predetermined role, Emma is killed.

It’s a pretty obvious theory, I know, but I wanted to present my ideas to potentially expand this theory. I also have a theory that McNamara is Tinky’s prophet that stems from his famous line ‘Wear a watch!’, but nobody wants to hear that 😂.

[strixcattus]

Trying to get out my full battery of Pristine Cut theories I think are at least pretty realistic (some mine, some not—I don't recall where the ones that aren't mine came from)

(Bold text is edits from shortly after the initial post)

—Fury, Den, and Apotheosis will get significant expansions (pretty sure this one has been implicitly stated by the devs if not explicitly so) —Prisoner, Damsel, and Spectre will all get a unique Chapter III to finish the symmetry of the game —All of the expanded Chapter IIIs will end up with both more options/resolutions and more fleshing out to some of the existing options (feels a given, but I'm trying to be comprehensive here)

FURY —Adversary->Fury will come with even more Voices (Smitten and possibly Cheated would be my guesses) —The "unwinding" sequence will be longer and have more variation/options than the single line we have now —Something surreal is going to happen to the Fury as she unwinds us (based on that one art shared by the devs)

DEN —Expanded "failure" sequences—at the very least choosing the option that wasn't in your plan will be as fleshed out as EotN's "failure" and at most you might get a chance to turn things around —A "freeze" option to bring the whole set forward from the Beast into the Den —This one's more hope than theory but it'd be nice if you got the option to spare the Den if you're on the "fight" path. It'd also be nice if there were more of a sequence to freeing the Den on the "flight" path, but of the two the former seems more likely.

APOTHEOSIS —I'm not sure what to say about this one aside from "your choices have tangible meaning now" —It'd be neat if the Tower chapter got a little more meat that led to multiple ways to reach Apotheosis and thus multiple Voices you could gain from that chapter, but it doesn't seem too likely

PRISONER —Complete the set with Beast and Adversary by having a Chapter III that can be reached with both Stubborn and Hunted, with different storylines depending on which Voice you get —The Prisoner gets to kill you (and how you approach this determines which Voice you get) —I kind of want to see this chapter get brought into the "the blade gives you more options" fold by allowing you the chance to refuse to take the blade, thus locking you onto either chaining yourself up or one variant of the new Chapter III —We're finally going to get a concrete justification for why the Prisoner, despite being one of the more cooperative Princesses, has the same font as the more inhuman/combative Princesses

DAMSEL —I think we're generally in agreement that the "up the stairs" image is probably for the new Chapter III —General consensus also seems to be that either we tell the Damsel to kill us or we insist on staying in the cabin with her forever —I personally favor the former theory since it would explain how we die (to move on to Chapter III) and it would add to the "taking the blade gives you more options" theme —We'll finally get another Chapter III that uses the font shared by the more gentle/human Princesses —Likely Voice candidates for the new chapter would be Contrarian or possibly Skeptic (Contra seems more likely, but I'm keeping an open mind)

SPECTRE —Possibility that the new Chapter III will only be accessible with the blade, though I can't imagine what it would be in that case —Notable that this is the only Chapter II called out by the devs... we might be seeing a significant expansion leading up to the new chapter, or even leading up to another Chapter II resolution —Perhaps there's a change in the sequence after you decide to refuse the Spectre's possession without slaying her or leaving the basement? —My best guess right now as to the lead-in would be that the new chapter stems from slaying yourself while possessed (unlikely since it's already a Chapter II resolution—would lead to gaining either Stubborn or Contrarian) (or Opportunist?) —I'm going back and forth about whether the new chapter might come from choosing to stay in the basement instead of leaving or trying to slay the Princess—I actually wrote and deleted it when initially posting—this would maybe result in Paranoid, Smitten, or Contrarian? —Most likely I think there'll be an entirely new section of the chapter that leads into the new Chapter III —To be honest the one thing I really hope is that somehow Broken shows up—this is the one pairing I really wanted to see since discovering you could mix and match the Voices in Chapter III —Maybe there'll be the possibility that you fail to escape the cabin while possessed? —Somewhere there will be an achievement called The Exorcist II (to go with The Exorcist and The Exorcist III)

[pareidolla]

hi!! holds up hand. in a more ideal situation (interpret that how you wish, maybe liike in the leaving together ending?) who do you think would broken have the healthiest relationsip with? both other voices and vessels.

oh, what a fun little question! upon reread i realize you might've meant a romantic relationship but i wrote this with mostly friendships in mind. however, i literally adore every broken pairing so i suppose this could still be read either way ♡

might be a little unexpected, but i imagine for 1-on-1 settings that broken would be hanging out with cheated most of time. ironically, where broken's bitterness tends to be ignored, cheated is way more friendly than people give him credit for.

broken frequently laments he's never been listened to, but cheated actually does listen to him! when you choose to surrender in the arms race, the other voices are against it, but cheated says it's worth a shot, and he's never harsh when speaking to him like the others. out of everyone he'd probably understand why broken has completely given up, and that he has good intentions despite. i can only think he'd be upset if forced into the apotheosis route (blacktabbygames on my hands and knees, please please please-), but most of his rage would be directed at the princess for rigging the game than anything the voices did.

i imagine cheated probably gently urges them to hang out together if broken's up for it. they'd do little activites like cleaning the church together, board games, sitting quietly as the rain falls, going out on a little rowboat on the lake to do some fishing and accepting their bad luck when it inevitably capsizes. divorced dad energy as i've seen someone say.

oh! as a bonus, for my own voices, chichi always huddles broken into his coat or offers it whenever it gets crowded since he knows broken doesn't do well with being looked at + broken reminds him of his family (flinching) :3c

hmm, as for the other voices, i think broken would have a nicest friendship with smitten and paranoid but they'd tend to clash more. which isn't a bad thing! smitten would definitely go overboard trying to cheer broken up and make him feel a little uneasy, while broken would undoubtedly assert that they are not destined lovers on equal footing with the princess, but i think they would still enjoy each other's company despite their differences. guys hated for their swag (unapologetically killing tlq).

paranoid meanwhile i think of as an exasperated mother hen. he wouldn't be overtly friendly like smitten or cheated but the first to check him over for any harm. have you eaten today? did you shower? you're making gloomy expression again, what are you thinking about? we need to go shopping later, your clothes are all ragged- and other clucking. the two are always pushing and pulling against eachother but i think of para as his closest friend because of it. tough love, baby!

as for the vessels⸻

WOUNDED WILD. ITS WOUNDED WILD AND IT'S NOT EVEN CLOSE.

(they make so violent. congratulations brokewild for inventing heterophobia 🎉)

i sometimes see posts where opportunist is jealous of witch/thorn and i think we should give tower the same treatment. her weird ass should stay grumbling by her temple's window as she watches broken and his friend clumsily dance in the garden. literally the virgin vs chad meme with these two.

i like to think in an au where they're seperate from shifting quiet that beast-wild would struggle with her personhood, and perhaps try seeking forgiveness from a deity since she can't forgive herself. she meets broken and they become sad little kindred spirits found whispering excitedly in the backpew.

and last but not least damsel! dambroken are quite similar characters in the sense they're both highly subservient to their lovers to the point of figuratively becoming nothing, so i always think of their interactions as the "and so, they were both bottoms" meme.

i actually think they'd actually clash a bit upon meeting. damsel's heart would break seeing her husband in such a sad state (in her mind everyone is just collectively married), and broken would probably be a little offput by how submissive she is despite being a princess. he'd get flustered if she tried to help him cook or clean and send her away, and outside the door you can see her mind kicking into overdrive trying to figure out how she's expected to make him happy if she can't do anything.

and maybe finally they'd have a quiet bonding moment where they sit and talk about their time in the construct. killing your lover and allowing your lover kill you seriously would have messed them up, and sharing pain with another lessens it. atleast a little.

tl;dr i love them your honor

[akihatohnoofficial]

did an oc collab with @rainydayequation!

[burning-sol]

biting biting biting zuen not only picked exandroth because they thought exandroth would be a suitable chosen but probably also actively encouraged exandroth to become the most extreme version of themselves to suit his goals. exandroth did not question this. exandroth knew they had different goals but didnt know zuen was taking advantage of her. i am clawing at the walls of my enclosure. EXANDROTH WAS BEING USED... AND ITS UNCLEAR IF AT ANY POINT EXANDROTH HAD COME TO REALISE THIS...

[citrineandrosmarin]

Athena and Herakles Wedding Imagery

Book: Athena by Susan Deacy (Highy recommend)

"In the chariot scenes showing his journey to Olympos, he is standing rigidly on the chariot while Athena is holding the reins. It has been observed that the scenes are resonant of depictions of ancient Greek weddings on which the bride would be conveyed to her new home in a chariot driven by the groom. At the time, then, when he is making the transition from human to god, he temporarily takes on a degree of passivity redolent of the quintessentially passive figure in iconographical terms: the bride. If Herakles is the bride, Athena is, effectively, the bridegroom."

"Athena, the virgin par excellence, adopting a characteristic male role and Herakles, the great deflowerer of women, being depicted as her bride."

"The use of wedding imagery is discernible, too, in Athena’s introduction of Herakles to Zeus. Figure 6 presents a comparable image of feminine passivity on the part of Herakles as set against masculine dominance of Athena. Athena is leading, if not pulling, Herakles towards Zeus by holding him by the wrist. This action evokes one of the standard features of wedding iconography, the cheir epi karpo (‘hand on wrist’) gesture whereby, in a movement with connotations of abduction, the seemingly unwilling bride was led to her destination."

"The unique closeness of Athena and Herakles is also depicted on several intimate scenes on Greek vases. In some of these scenes the two figures are shown resting with one another or else engaging in recreational activities. Athena is often shown standing beside Herakles while he is reclining. In other scenes he is playing the lyre while Athena is at his side. Elsewhere, Athena is given the role of his cup-bearer in that she is pouring from a jug into a vessel that he is holding out."

"Attempting an interpretation of these scenes is a frustrating process because it is unclear where we should place them in Herakles’ myth. Is Athena keeping him company while he takes a break from his labours? Should they alternatively be viewed as post-apotheosis scenes depicting two deities taking pleasure in one another’s company? Whichever is the case, they portray an intimacy and personal bond that exceeds any other of Athena’s relationships, even that with her father Zeus."

[hatchetfieldtheories]

Workin' Boys: A New Theory

So, I’ve changed my mind.

A while back I wrote this theory, and while I do still think there is some truth to the theory that Hidgens began to have his apotheosis once he touched the blue goo, I think there is more to the story.

Note, the below contains one mild spoiler for NPMD.  Mild only in that I will briefly reference one character without any context added.  Feel free to skip this theory if you wish, or come back to it post 13th October to see how much I got wrong!!

Great Scott! It’s a Workin Boys theory!

The world will be blessed with Workin Boys next week, and I know not everyone will get to watch it, but it’s safe to say there will be things we learn from the show that will either answer some of our never ending questions, or give us more to puzzle over.  The latter being the one I’m expecting if I’m honest, afterall, this is Hatchetfield.  

And to be honest, we’ve not been given much to work on.  The trailer and synopsis are both pretty short, we’ve had a sprinkling of facts and figures over the last couple of years, and a few Hidgens cameos, so this isn’t really a theory of what I think will be the storyline, but rather an attempt to predict some of the themes and potential lore implications that might arise.

Also for reference, a good portion of the info used in this theory has come from these two wonderful compendiums of Hatchetfield knowledge:

@gone-to-oregone's wonderful Everything is Connected doc

@abiimaryy's amazing Hatchetfield Lore Doc

The Stage is Set

Professor Henry Hidgens and Doctor Emmett Brown have a lot in common.  They’re eccentric, they’re clever, and they both had a vision of something world changing due to an accident they had 30 years ago.

For Henry, this doesn’t result in any fun 50s hijinks, but rather he gets struck by lightning in 1988 and predicts the world ending by musical apotheosis. Super specific, honestly.  But what is important is that date.

Hidgens didn’t predict the events of TGWDLM after 2005, but rather before. If this had happened to him after 2005 we could easily put the lightning strike down to an event unique to the TGWDLM timeline only.  However, his accident happened way before 2005, way before the timelines split.  So just as Ted must be the Homeless Guy in every single Hatchetfield timeline, Hidgens must also be expecting a musical apocalypse in every timeline.

This must also include Working Boys, whatever timeline that ends up being in.  In Workin Boys, Hidgens would be under the impression that at some point soon, a musical apocalypse is about to happen.  So what does that have to do with said musical-within-a-musical?

Here come the LiB

It’s pretty safe to say Pokey is heavily influencing whatever happens in Workin Boys.  First of all, its a musical so it was going to be a safe bet.  But judging by the trailer, we’ve got multiple references to our fave goo gremlin. The blue light shining on Henry, multiple voices calling him in a Singular Voice, and Joey’s jumpscare where he looks like Pokey incarnate.

Who Joey is in that small clip is anyone’s guess.  I’ve seen a few theories floating about, including Chad, Mathias Waylon, and Pokey himself.  Honestly, I’m not sure, but what is important is how he looks.  Whoever this fella is, he’s got a blue hue, a cracked face, and ooze dripping down his chin.  If he’s not Pokey, he’s someone who has been Pokey-fied.

And this link was always going to make sense.  Workin Boys has had its biggest show stopping moment in Pokey’s timeline.  

But what if Workin Boys was created, because and for Pokey.

In TGWDLM, we get a whole scene of our cast of characters witnessing the meteor coming through the clouds.  Our cast of characters are busy going about their evening, finishing work, wondering what is coming through the clouds.  Notably, Paul is on his way home, from his work, in the business world.  Paul doesn’t strike me as someone who stays late at work, so it’s safe to say that the meteor hit the Earth’s atmosphere around.. 5 O’clock?

This is Pokey’s Workin Boys now

Let’s go back to that incident with the lightning strike.  Henry was hit by lightning and predicted the apocalypse.  I’ve referenced in a few theories (1 & 2) that I think lightning is more than just the LiB’s motif.  It’s the strike of inspiration, of interference, of the Lords in Black in the real world.  The Black Book contains references to lightning, we see a crack of lightning across each Hatchetfield show title, when the meteor crashes at the Starlight lightning is flashing through the sky.

Something to shock em, to bring them a crawling, a big time box office draw

When Henry was hit by lightning, he didn’t just see the potential musical end times. But he was also given Workin Boys - or at least, he was given his inspiration.  Workin Boys was always written for Pokey. It’s Hidgen’s story, yes, but the musical itself is for our blue boy.  It was a pre-destined self-destruction.

The musical Hidgens writes tells us the 5 O’Clock can’t come soon enough because in one timeline, that is when the meteor will strike.  This is why he is trying so hard to fund the show in every timeline, because in one timeline he needs to put it on stage for whatever Pokey has planned.  Whatever Pokey requires half of Hatchetfield to be in attendance for.

Prof. H and Miss H?

I’ll be honest, and apologies in advance.  I don’t think Miss Holloway is alive in the Workin Boys timeline.

We were told following NMT2’s release (via Jim Povolo’s watch series) that the Black Book we see in Killer Track was created for Workin Boys, which means providing things haven’t changed we should see the book.  If that’s the case, then Miss H doesn’t have it.  It’s possible that Hidgens somehow gets hold of the book, and when the show of his dreams doesn’t look to be going the way he expected - he does what Thrash told everyone he did - he sold his soul to the devil.  Or, well, to the Black and White.

As to when he gets the Black Book - who knows - but all I’ll say is it’s very interesting that Miss H is our 80s queen, and Hidgen’s divine inspiration also occurred in the 80s.

Encore

Well, that’s the main theory.  But we’ve got time for one last little theory that’s very loosely based on nothing.

Workin Boys: A New Musical, is based on Hidgens’ friends from college - old college chums in a beat up old house. Specifically - six of them - not including Henry.  I’ve seen a few theories regarding the six workin boys being a stand in for the LiB and Webby.  Is this a stretch? Maybe.  But it also kind of fits.  From odd instances in livestreams and tweets, it’s clear that Henry was not throwing that old pigskin around (specifically in one of Nick’s tweets that there are 7 workin boys, but 6 on the field).  Henry isn’t a part of that group.  Not fully.  So if we do get to meet any of the irl workin boys, I don’t think their dynamic is going to be quite how Hidgen’s pictures it.

Well, if you made it this far please help yourself to some interval ice cream and a show programme. And remember - there’s no exits from this broadway venue.

[semidecentpoet]

I keep thinking about Peter Sqloint (spoilers for JRWI Apotheosis)

(This is expanding a wee bit on this post I made a while ago lol)

Apotheosis: "the perfect form or example of something;" "elevation to divine status"

Rumi and Thanatos were destined for great things—or "destined," depending on how you look at things given that the whole thing was just Zuen and Exandroth deciding to Fuck Shit Up because Zuen was just fuckin bored. The whole shtick was a divine ploy from the very beginning. Zuen gave Rumi visions, setting them on the path to ascend to godhood. Exandroth helped to create Thanatos, forging his path to end godhood.

From the start, it's all divine intervention. Rumi is supposed to become a god. Thanatos is supposed to kill all the gods. This is how it's supposed to go.

Really, from the standpoint of Zuen, it's meant to be Rumi, Thanatos, and Exandroth, not Rumi, Thanatos, and Peter. Peter isn't supposed to be anything. He's just some loser nobody Exandroth found, a throwaway vessel. There are no divine plans for Peter except to be an archangel's meat puppet. Peter's purpose is to be a vessel for Exandroth's purpose. Peter is just some human.

But there's the kicker: Peter is human. Part of what makes Apotheosis such a beautiful campaign is this juxtaposition of godhood and humanity and the powers of both: the grand versus the humble, the mighty versus the meek. Zuen and Exandroth don't think twice about Peter because he's human and what could a human do? As far as they know, they have set Rumi and Thanatos' paths in stone.

They didn't account for the one stone that upset everything.

To be clear, all three of them helped to change each other. Another part of what makes Apotheosis a beautiful campaign is the character dynamics and the way they influence each other's development; they all change each other so intrinsically. But it's Peter in particular who changes everything.

Rumi is obsessed with their visions and their notion of perfection, their goal of becoming a god. But it's Peter, just by being Peter, who reminds them of what the gods' hubris has blinded them to, of what traits are truly powerful and most important.

Thanatos is tunnelvisioned on destroying all the gods, a bloodthirsty machine. But it's Peter, just by being Peter, who shows him how to live, who shows him there's more to life than his purpose; through Peter, Thanatos finds there's more to himself.

Rumi and Thanatos are naturally destined—or "destined"—to be at each other's throats with their conflicting goals, and we see them debate and even full-on argue multiple times throughout the campaign. But it's Peter who keeps them together. It's Peter who asks questions and who makes them question their own beliefs. It's Peter's humanity that irreversibly transforms them.

It starts as an apotheosis of godhood. It becomes an apotheosis of humanity.

Zuen's plan, by all means, should have been foolproof. He's got a killing machine and a person driven by vision-fueled vanity, plus an archangel to make sure things stay on track. But he failed to consider all the variables. He underestimated humanity.

Peter's humanity defied Zuen's divine intervention. Humanity defied the divine.

I just find it fascinating that in the middle of all the action and the speeches, the magic and the power, the mission and the visions, and the overall grandeur of godhood, the thing that changed everything—the catalyst of this transformation from what they were supposed to be to who they became—was what and who everyone least expected.

In the words of Rumi: "It is because you are just Peter Sqloint. That is what makes you more, and you need not be anything else."

What's more, the stone that the builders rejected ultimately becomes the cornerstone of a new and godless world. A world by and for humanity. A world that isn't perfect, but it is theirs.

I wanna hear others' thoughts on this bc I am just so fucking in love with this campaign, you have no idea ;PPPPPP

(Also, if you want to respond with moments from the campaign that have to do with this discussion, by all means do so bc I wrote this all from my not-exact recollection of the campaign and the perfectionist writer in me is a little irked by the lack of evidence to my claims lol)

[just-some-guy-joust]

Just Some Guy Joust - Contestants List

Note: This is NOT the order of the brackets. Like with the last tournament, the order of the brackets will be a surprise. This list was randomized from the brackets I set up and does not represent who each character will be up against. The only thing you know for sure which side of the bracket they're on. When the polls go up, they'll be posted in order based on the list here, NOT based on where their brackets actually are!

Round 2 of both sides of the tourney is now over!

(Full list of surviving characters in text format is under the cut. Please refer to this post if you want the full list of all characters in text format)

Side A

Sasha James (The Magnus Archives)

Junpei (Zero Escape)

Horse (Centaurworld)

Gordon Freeman (HLVRAI)

Namari (Dungeon Meshi)

Henry Stickmin (Henry Stickmin)

Stanley (The Stanley Parable)

Larry (Pokemon)

Barry the Quokka (The Murder of Sonic the Hedgehog)

April O'Neil (TMNT - All versions)

Matt (Woe.Begone)

Gilear Faeth (Fantasy High - Dimension 20)

Apollo Justice (Ace Attorney)

Stahl (Fire Emblem: Awakening)

Brian Pasternack (Yuppie Psycho)

Trevor Hills (American Arcadia)

Side B

Carol Kohl (Carol and The End of The World)

Paul Matthews (The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals)

Satou Hiroshi (Disastrous Life of Saiki K.)

Michelle Nguyen (Welcome to Night Vale)

Tad Strange (Gravity Falls)

The Bard (Wandersong)

Nick Carraway (The Great Gatsby)

Connecticut Clark (FlorkofCows)

Samwise Gamgee (Lord of the Rings)

Hitomi Shizuki (Madoka Magica)

Junpei Iori (Persona 3)

Peter Sqloint (Just Roll With It: Apotheosis)

Cabbage Merchant (Avatar: The Last Airbender)

Greg Universe (Steven Universe)

Elsen (OFF)

Mob (Mob Psycho 100)