#seriously though the one ship that doesn’t cover his part with just the j is the one that takes off

[jabithajates]

It’s 2021 and I’m still wondering why “Bughead” stuck instead of “Jetty”. Like why would y’all do that

[the-phoenix-heart]

10 Amazing Futurama Comics

There is a severe lack of Futurama content on this and other sites (seriously, the Night at the Museum movies have more fics than Futurama). And, nobody posts about the Futurama comics. So I’m posting 10 of my favorites.

10. Attack of the 50-Foot Amy (Issue #33)

It’s actually not as sexual as the cover makes it out to be. The basic premise is that Amy mistakes the can of growth spray (that Cubert and Dwight want to use for their science fair project) for hair spray and sprays waaaay too much before her anniversary date with Kif. Meanwhile, Bender teaches Fry the wonders of video piracy, but after he gets scared by a movie home alone style he eats his disc of pirated movies and starts uncontrollably acting them out. You can probably guess how these two plots connect.

While I do list this one as one of my favorites, it’s far from perfect. The artwork is good, but the scaling on Amy is very wonky so she looks more like a twenty-foot Amy (also Dwight’s eyes are drawn weird in this comic, he looks blazed out the entire time). But I cannot help but be charmed by this comic. It’s got some sweet Bender and Fry friendship moments and actually makes me believe Kif and Amy’s relationship for a little bit. They are very sweet in this comic, although Kif does go through some pain in this comic.

Best moments: They way they resolve the plot is actually pretty funny and clever, plus Bender hopped up on pirated movies is a joy. At one point Fry gets shoved by Steven Spielbot (don’t ask) and Bender goes all Rocky on his ass saying “No one talks to my gal, Adrian, like that!” It’s very sweet and...subtextual if you understand my meaning. This one also has anti comic book piracy message at the end which was ironic for me to read.

9. Doctor What (Issue #32)

The Professor creates a time traveling port-a-potty so that you can pee in whatever time and space you want, although it’s completely random. However, Zoidberg accidentally breaks the potty, so him, Leela, Fry, and Bender have to keep randomly flushing to get back home. On each of these new worlds Zoidberg keeps accidentally saving the citizens, getting medals, and ends up becoming addicted to the fame he keeps winning. Which leads to them getting stuck in a post apocalyptic New New York.

This is the infamous Leela-Bender-Fry fusion comic, Leelan von Fry-Bot. His backstory is actually a little sad, but I won’t spoil it here. This one is pretty good, because it has Zoidberg as the hero. Actually quite a few of these feature Zoidberg as a fourth member of the delivery crew which is weird, but not entirely unwelcome. It’s also fun to see these other worlds, and now that I think about it it’s actually a little similar to The Late Phillip J. Fry, what with the time travel to different interesting worlds.

Best Moments: I actually liked Leelan’s backstory, and his interactions with his “parents” (you’ll understand when you read it) are actually pretty funny and a little cute. Fry really wants to be a dad you can tell.

8. The Simpsons Futurama Crossover Crisis II

The professor creates a device that takes characters out of their stories into the real world. Trouble is, he tells the mayor that this invention is useful because you can get slave labor out of the characters because they technically have no constitutional rights. The Simpsons end up working with the Planet Express crew, but an accident leads to the release of ALL FICTIONAL CHARACTERS EVER.

This is a sequel comic to the Futurama Simpsons Infinitely Secret Crossover Crisis (fun fact: a reference to several famous comic book arcs). I chose this one above it though because I think it understood the assignment better. The original is funny, but I just don’t think that Springfield is a good setting for a Futurama crossover. Springfield for all its zaniness, is not the future. New New York, however, is great for this crossover. We get several scenes where we see the Simpsons going through space and fighting off monsters. We even get to see the other residents of Springfield in the future, Mr. Smithers becomes a space pirate and Mr. Burns falls in love with Mom, it’s great.

Best Moments: Some of them I already mentioned, but I cannot stress enough how hilarious the Burns-Mom romance is, it’s especially good when you can hear their voices in your head. I also like the friendship the Simpsons have with the Planet Express crew.

7. Six Characters in Search of a Story (Issue #14)

This is a very interesting comic. The Professor falls asleep, so to pass the time the crew decides to look through his old failed inventions, and well, that’s a very bad idea. The most interesting thing about this comic is it’s designed so that if you want you can only read certain panels to follow one person’s story. The Futurama comics do this a lot of the time and it’s always interesting.

The shenanigans that occur in this one are really funny, and there are some great looking pages in this. Also the Futurama crew clearly took ideas from the comics, and this is one of them. You can tell from the cover art that this does have elements of “Benderama” in it, what with Bender cloning himself ad infinitum. I also really like the climax, it’s a little schmultz-y for Futurama, but I don’t mind.

Best Moments: Fry gets stuck with a Spanish speaking Bender and I don’t know why but it’s really funny to me. The professor also gets some funny moments in this one. And Scruffy. Scruffy is always a delight.

6. Igner-ance is Bliss! (Issue #63)

Yeah this is the infamous robot Leela and Fry comic. Don’t worry, like the cover says, it’s not as dramatic as it looks. The crew has to go to a world that’s too dangerous for humans, so Fry, Leela, and Zoidberg all have their consciousnesses put into robot doubles so they can make the delivery. However, it turns out this planet is a sort of getaway spa for robots, and the crew decides to party it up there, at least until Bender discovers that this is a front for an evil plot by Mom. The subplot is mostly about how Igner is not respected by his brothers.

This one is fun, and I love a comic where Bender has to be the voice of reason. It is clearly killing him to be the responsible one, but I love it. Also, I have a soft spot for Igner, so it’s nice to see him get thrown a bone for once. This also has some really fun jokes with everyone, but Zoidberg in particular gets some bangers. I think my only problem is it ISN’T as cool as the cover makes it out, but like I’m happy with what it is.

Best Moments: Fry beats up Bender at one point and wins, I think he deserved it. Also, y’all know Admiral Ackbar from Star Wars? He makes some cameos in this one. Also all the robots (sans Bender) make a Japanese style mecha and it’s the coolest thing ever. Plus everything I’ve said about Igner I love in this one. Oh also Fry beats Calculon at poker and I really love that.

5. Who’s Dying to be a Gazillionaire? (Issue #5)

This one is sweet. The IRS is threatening to bankrupt Planet Express, and if they can’t think of a way to make a million dollars they will go out of business. No one really has any ideas and doesn’t even really care, except for Fry who is determined to save Planet Express. He gets the idea to go onto Who Wants to be a Gazillionaire to make the money, even though it’s a trivia show and if he loses he will die.

This one really warms my heart, it’s Fry at his best, just doing what he can for the people he loves. Even the professor is great in this one. I don’t want to spoil it, but trust me when I say it’s good (god I hope I’m not building this up too much).

Best moments: The end panel. But also the resolution of the story is great, and I really appreciate this comic for Fry as a character.

4. Rumble in the Jungle (Issue #38)

This is a fine comic. Leela is mad that she’s not being respected by Fry and Bender, and it’s bad enough that they don’t believe her when she says they’re going to crash into a planet. They end up parachuting down and getting separated. Leela ends up as queen of some workers in the “Amazon,” meanwhile Fry finds Bender’s corpse and goes off to avenge him.

This one is fun, and another fun one for Fry, because he’s determined to avenge Bender and works hard for it. This also includes the original Frender, not the ship but fusion. Leela and Fry even have a fight scene against each other and it’s honestly great.

Best Moments: Fry is great throughout the entire comic, and Leela spends most of her time beating up random animals. Bender also using a lead parachute he made out of toys he stole from children is funny, especially because I’m always a sucker for Bender doing dumb shit.

3. Don’t Go Taking My Heart! (Issue #69) (nice)

Mom only has a couple weeks to live, unless she can get a heart transplant. It’s revealed that Mom uses the cryogenics lab to get new body parts for herself, and that Fry was supposed to be her heart donor! Unfortunately, because he was unfrozen she now has to get him to work for Mom Corp to make sure his heart stays intact for the procedure.

If you can’t tell I love the Fry-centric comics, and I also like the comics where Mom is the villain. Of course this comic doesn’t go completely how you expect it to go, it’s actually REALLY sweet. I also love the fact that in this comic Fry actually makes a great intern. He basically has the job of a secretary and he’s GOOD at it. And I love seeing when Fry is good at things. The reason why I put this at only 3 is because it doesn’t really have a subplot. Bender gets a job at mom corp to but it’s only there for a couple pages, and Leela’s new crew gets two panels and that’s it.

Best Moments: The moments with Mom and Fry, but also guess who Mom’s doctor is? I’m actually not going to reveal it because it’s so random but also hilarious.

2. Boomsday! (Issue #58)

The Professor builds Bender his own parents, as a way to placate/discipline Bender. However, these parents decide that Fry is a bad influence on Bender, leading to them kicking him out. Meanwhile, the Professor’s doomsday devices are all stolen, and he has to go find them.

Both of these plots are funny and good. Bender’s plot is also really sweet what with his friendship with Fry, and his wish for parents. Meanwhile the Professor’s plot is just really funny and I do love seeing the Professor in his element. The ending is mostly heartwarming.

Best Moments: Everything with Fry and Bender, and Bender has a sweet relationship with his fake parents. Also, the Professor uses Issac Asimov candles on the robot mafia which I found a great joke. Oh, and the Professor’s first doomsday device was made when he was four years old and I love that. The end of the comic also has very nice message.

1. Rotten to the Core (Issue #27)

The world’s weather has gone kerflooey, and the Professor has figured out that his invention that can drill into the center of the Earth has been used. It conspires that Bender sold it at a yard sale to some aliens call the magmoids. The magmoids are trying to steal magma from the Earth’s core and the crew has to go and stop them.

This is my favorite because it’s a great character comic. All of the main three have great moments, and it’s also a great science comic. The Earth’s core is incredibly magnetic so of course Bender starts spouting out folk songs, and also SECRETS. I can’t believe no one has used the fact that canonically magnets make Bender incapable of telling lies. Anyway, it’s just really fun.

Best Moments: Way too many to count. Bender and Fry are told to cut out the “Brokeback Moanin,’“ Leela and Fry are bitter at the end, Fry tells story about his childhood, Bender has some great secrets to tell, the Professor gets a really fun ending, Bender has a rare moment of generosity, and the entirety of the climax is all kinds of fun and sweet.

[souyaszn]

ooh yea if you want to, I always like seeing how others ship ppl 😙 maybe the moots you talk to the most rn or something?

OOH OKAY SO.

MATCHMAKING WITH SUPER GUCCI COOCHIE COI!

my moots + … (PART ONE)

@sanophiliac — benkei. i feel like he’d worship the ground zai walks on and be a big teddy bear for her yk? (side note: i also think he’d be too nice for zai so she’d probably cheat on him with mikey for the toxicity yk but he’d find out and accept it so they’ll end up having an open relationship)

@anubai — if i say anything but baji i think i may be struck down by lightning. when i think of crew and baji i think of bike grease and sundresses. he spreads chaos everywhere and cleans up his act the second he’s brushing his foot on her doormat.

@spicysoftsweet — naoto. just bc of today /j her lil fairly odd parent pixie. seriously though? ushijima. i’ve seen it and i cannot stop seeing it. u saw that meme of perfectly calm bf and feral gf? i see that and i see them. he balances out mae’s menace

@lovebykai — kokonoi. he’s ruthless and rich and would absolutely indulge kai in every way imagineable (including the ways that worry me). one day we’d see kai looking normal and the next diamonds up to their neck. all in a span of 24 hrs.

@ryugujislut — ran. beats people to death without batting an eye and is an absolute dork for sammy here. definitely plays off the effect sam has on him through teasing until rindou snitches. likes to let sam sleep on the side that isn’t tattooed so he could be covered at all times. real dorky.

@shiwhore — taiju. he thinks it’s impossible for him to be loved bc of the bullshit he pulled on his siblings (rightfully so) until he meets shi. thinks she’s insane at first or fucking with him. slowly realizes she’s fr the longer she sticks around. and surprisingly she doesn’t want him to change who he is for her which makes him want to better himself even more for her. yk? starts putting her in his prayers without even realizing. y’all know that gif of kirby and bowser? hold on let me get it.

them.

@kontentious — OH I AIN’T FORGET. hanma. totally would be the relationship you say ‘oh yall so cute’ and praying they break up. oh i’d hate his guts. but they’re actually both insane and sexy and teasing and testing each other’s patience is their main dynamic.

[fandomfanfics12]

10,000 Hours-Part 1

Title: 10,000 hours Pairings: Steve x Tony Warnings: swearing, fluff, angst, slowburn. Summary: Tony’s a hotshot lawyer in upstate New York. Steve’s a single father in a small town out in North Carolina. When Tony’s law firm suggests he takes a year off after his Uncle Jarvis passes, Tony and Steve’s lives entangle themselves together. But their time together is limited, and their lives are so different that it may be impossible to ever make it work.  A/N: A new fic that i’ve been working on, hope you like it. 

Tony stared out of the window of his big fancy office, and admired the skyline of New York City. It would be the last good Friday night he’d get to have for a while. In exactly one weeks time, he had to defend his client of the charge of first degree murder. He heard the door open and sighed, Pepper’s heels clicked on the hardwood floor.

“Tony.” Her voice was calm, stern and he spun around in his chair. he plastered a smile onto his face, her blonde hair tied back in a tight bun.

“Hey Pep, is the car ready?” he asked and watched as her eyes darted down to the opened bottle of whiskey on his desk.

“We need to talk.” She said and Tony rolled his eyes, she knew how to ruin a good mood.

“Can we leave it for Monday? It’s eight o’clock on a Friday night, what are you even doing here?” Tony asked and she sat down across from him, a deep frown set upon her face.

“This is serious Tony.” She told him and he shrugged. It was always serious.

“Did dear old dad call?” Tony asked and stared up at the roof, not able to stand Pepper’s disapproving and pitying frown any longer.

“He did, actually.” Tony sighed and looked back to her. His father owned the law firm that Tony worked at, and it was nothing more than a royal pain in Tony’s ass.

“And what did Howard have to say?” Tony set the glass of whiskey down on the oak desk and Pepper glanced down at the tablet which she was holding a little too tightly in her hands. “Pep?” Tony asked, frowning and she looked back up at him.

“It was about your uncle Jarvis.” Tony rose a single brow.

“Uncle J? what about him?” Tony began to rifle through a drawer, looking for his phone which he’d dumped that morning.

“Tony he died.” Tony’s hand stilled in the drawer. He didn’t know Jarvis all that well, but the man had been nothing but kind towards Tony.

“Oh.” Tony looked back to her, her eyes shone with tears.

“I’m so sorry.” Tony shook his head, he didn’t want her to pity him.

“It’s alright Pepper. Death is a part of life.” Tony shrugged and she sighed.

“That’s not all I have to tell you.” Tony nodded and leaned back in the chair, Pepper tucked a piece of hair back with a trembling hand.

“It’s alright Pepper, do you need a moment?” she shook her head and Tony nodded.

“Jarvis had this big beach house up in North Carolina, he’s left it to you.” Tony nodded and tapped his fingers on the desk. He had no use for a beach house.

“Okay I’ll have it looked at and put on the market.” Pepper sighed.

“The funeral is next Friday.” Tony sighed and squeezed his eyes shut.

“Could it be pushed to Thursday?” he asked and when he opened his eyes, Pepper was tapping away at her tablet.

“No it can’t. Friday is the funeral.”

“But I have to be in court.”

“The other partners have put it to a vote and you’ve been kicked off the case.” At that, Tony snorted.

“Kicked off?”

“They’ve given it to Bruce.”

“Banner?” Tony shrieked and Pepper nodded her head. Tony swore, anger radiated throughout him.

“it’s non-negotiable Tony.”

“But doesn’t Banner have his own cases to work?” Tony asked and she shook her head.

“The other partners also agreed, upon your father’s recommendation, that you should take some time off.” At that, Tony snorted.

“Time off?” he lived and breathed his job. Time off was a foreign concept to him.

“A year.”

“A year?” his brows rose and she nodded her head.

“They’re all worried about you.”

“They’re my colleagues, it’s not their place to worry.” Tony said and Pepper sighed.

“You’re twenty-seven years old and you act like a toddler.” She told him, it was rather blunt but Tony took it in stride.

“And?”

“And the partners want you to clean your act up. If you don’t then it’s more than likely you’ll be pushed out of the company.” Tony sighed, he really didn’t have a choice then.

“So what? I just stay at home for the next year?”

“No. Your dad had the locks changed today.” Tony rose his brows.

“are you fucking serious?”

“He emailed me, he wants you to spend this time in North Carolina. Get some perspective.” Tony shook his head, this couldn’t be happening.

“Perspective?”

“I think it will be good for you. take the year off, come back hungry for the job.” Tony looked at her and then nodded.

���Alright, but only because I literally have no other option.” Tony ran a hand through his hair and Pepper visibly relaxed. Obviously she’d expected more of a fight from him.

“Great, your flight leaves in three hours.”

“three hours?”

“I sent someone to pack your bags earlier today. Happy will take you to the airport.”

-

Steve started the engine, the truck sputtered to life and he relaxed in his seat.

“Seatbelt.” He said as he put his own one.

“you really should get the engine looked at.” Peter said and Steve nodded.

“Yeah I know.” He thought of the jar of money he had underneath the bed, he’d get it looked at as soon as he could afford it.

“Dad?” Steve reversed out of their driveway and began the route to school.

“yeah Pete?”

“Are we going to Jarvis’ funeral on Friday?” Steve sighed and stopped at the red light.

“I dunno, I’ll see if I can get off work.” He promised and Peter looked out the window.

“so that’s a no.”

“Peter…” Steve trailed off and Peter shook his head.

“he was our neighbour dad.”

“We didn’t know him that well either kid.” Steve said and Peter sighed.

“I know, but Jarvis kept to himself. What if no one goes to the funeral?” Peter glanced over at Steve.

“people will go to the funeral Pete. Besides, you have school so you can’t go anyway.” Peter rolled his eyes and Steve pulled into a parking spot at the school.

“We should go.” Peter said and Steve looked over at him.

“since when did you care so much about Jarvis the next door neighbour?” Steve asked and Peter unbuckled his seat belt.

“It’s stupid.” He got out of the truck, Steve grabbed Peter’s bag before he could take off.

“Pete?” Steve rose a brow and Peter stared down at his shoes.

“I guess I was just hoping that we could go see mom while we were there.” Steve let go of the bag and sat back, he stared straight ahead and took a deep steadying breath.

“We can go see her on Friday if you want.” Steve’s voice was strained and Peter groaned.

“Dad-“ Steve shook his head, then cut Peter off.

“You should get to class, you’ve got that math test right?” Peter nodded and then slammed the door shut. he only looked back at Steve once. Then disappeared into the crowd. Steve rested his head on the steering wheel and forced himself to calm down. Now wasn’t the time, and it wasn’t the place. He pulled out of the school parking lot and drove to work, pushing away any thoughts about his dead ex-wife.

-

Tony had to catch a bus into town. Then he had to walk with his suitcase trailing behind him to the house with dodgy instructions from the bus driver. The house, was large, wooden and sat right on the beach. But it was also a mess, completely falling apart.

“Well this is just great.” Tony grumbled as he approached the front door. Only his father would be capable of not only shipping Tony away, but shipping him off to an inhabitable nightmare. Tony climbed up the rickety steps, dragging his suitcase up behind him and stood before an ancient door. Tony sighed and then shoved the rusted key into the door and unlocked it. he then had to throw his shoulder into it and the old door groaned as it swung open.

“Hello?” he called out, even though he knew that the house would be empty. There was no response and he stepped inside, leaving his suitcase on the old and rotting porch. It was worse on the inside. everything was covered in dust, and a foul smell hit Tony’s nose.

“Oh that’s disgusting.” He grumbled and pulled out his phone. He called Pepper and she answered on the third ring.

“Tony?”

“Hey Pep, I’m inside the house and I am telling you that I have learnt my lesson. Very funny. When’s my flight out of here?”

“In three-hundred-and-sixty-two days.” She said and Tony let out a humourless laugh.

“That’s funny. But seriously Pep I need to get out of here. This house is…” Tony trailed off and heard Pepper’s impatient sigh.

“Tony I told you that Jarvis hadn’t actually lived in the house for three years leading up to his passing.” At that, Tony snorted.

“That explains a lot.” The windows were covered in a gross film that made Tony second guess himself.

“I had the house checked before you arrived. It’s been given the all-clear.”

“Of what? I’m probably breathing in toxic fumes as we speak.” He shook his head, were they really forcing him to live there for the next year?

“I wouldn’t let you stay there if it were dangerous. You’re being overdramatic. Try and relax, or fix the house up. I don’t have time to listen to you whinge.” Pepper said and Tony sighed.

“Fine, I’ll let you get back to helping Banner on my murder trial.” He flicked on the lights and flinched at the sudden brightness.

“Bye Tony.” And then she hung up on him. He shoved the phone back into his pocket and looked around the house. Fix the house up. He shook his head, he could head back into town and see if anyone would do it for him. Or Tony could do it himself. He had vague memories of helping his uncle build up old cars when he was a kid. He had enjoyed being a handy man mechanic at the time. But rebuilding and fixing up an entire house?

But then again, it wasn’t like Tony had anything better to do.

“There must be at least one clean room in this house.” Tony grumbled to himself and then ventured further in, hoping to find a space he could dump his stuff.

-

When Friday rolled around, Peter had stopped talking to Steve. Steve had promised he’d take Peter to the cemetery but said he couldn’t pull Peter out of school for the funeral. But it was dead quiet at the hardware store where Steve worked, only him and his co-worker, Sam, occupied the place.

“Do you mind if I pop out for a couple hours?” Steve asked and Sam shrugged.

“you going to the funeral?” Sam asked and Steve nodded his head.

“Yeah, Peter made a big deal about it and he was my neighbour.”

“Steve you don’t have to reason with me, just go. I’ll makes sure the place doesn’t burn down while your gone.” Steve smiled and nodded.

“thanks Sam, I’ll see you later.” And then Steve was out the door, climbing into his truck. The funeral had started at two, and according to the clock on the dash it was now two-thirty. He might be able to catch the tail-end of it. Steve hoped no one would mind the old jeans, black t-shirt and blue flannel that he had on. He pulled into the funeral home and noted that there were only two other parked cars.

“Peter had a point.” Steve grumbled as he climbed out of the truck. He slipped inside to the funeral where there were only four other patrons. Steve sat down in the back, a part of him regretted coming in the first place. Three of the four people were unfamiliar to Steve. There was an elderly couple who had probably lived with Jarvis in the old-people’s home. Then there was Doc Strange, who had looked after Jarvis in all the hospital visits over the last few years. And then there was the man up the front.

Steve couldn’t really see him, but from the suit alone he knew the man wasn’t from around here. Jarvis had never mentioned any family. But then again, maybe they weren’t that close. Steve wondered what Peter would think of the man. Probably be relieved to know that at least someone showed up for the funeral. No sooner than two minutes since Steve had sat down was it over.

“I would now ask that everyone leave the room so the family can have a moment.” One of the attendants announced. The man at the front hunched over, was he crying? He looked over his shoulder and surveyed the room, and then his eyes met Steve’s.

Holy shit.

-

Tony wanted this to be over with. As soon as the funeral was done, he’d go to the town bar for a drink and tell Pepper to send him back home. He turned around in his seat to thank the doctor and the old couple for coming when he saw the man in the back. The guy had let his hair grow too long and it desperately needed a cut. The dirty blonde hair stood out on odd angles. Then there were his clothes, jeans and a flannel? Tony really did need to get the hell out of here.

-

Steve’s breath was taken away by the man’s face. He was hot, and he seemed arrogant enough to know it. there wasn’t even a hint of sadness on the man’s face. But he had to be family, otherwise why was the attendant ask everyone else to leave? Steve got to his feet and the man turned back to the front, was Steve supposed to say something to the guy? He decided it was better not, and stepped outside. He needed to pick Peter up from school soon anyway.

-

Tony sat down at the bar, beer in hand and stared at his cell phone. The first three times he’d tried Pepper, she hadn’t answered. He’d texted Bruce on how the case was going and got no response. How was he supposed to get out of here, if no one would answer their damn phone? Tony didn’t want to go back to that nightmare house of his, not tonight. He hadn’t expected the funeral to be so emotionally draining and he felt exhausted. He just wanted to turn off his emotions for a little while. He brought the cheap shitty beer to his mouth and took a swig, wishing for the scotch back home.

“Shut up!” someone yelled across the bar. Tony glanced over and recognised the dirty blonde mop of hair from the funeral. The guy was heavily intoxicated, but in better shape than the drunk he was yelling at. The drunk in question wore a dirty old baseball cap and an oversized shirt that was covered in grease stains.

“Everyone knows it was your fault that she died, did you kill the neighbour too?” baseball cap slurred his words, but they were loud enough to silence the room.

“I said shut up Benny.” Blonde guy snapped and Tony frowned. They needed to calm down.

“is the kid next? I bet he’s next, you’ve never treated him right.” baseball cap laughed, blonde smashed his fist into baseball caps nose.

“Steve!” a bartender cried but it was too late. The two men were on the floor, landings punches and kicks into one another. Tony stepped forward before he could think his decision through. He grabbed the blonde by the back of his shirt and dragged him back.

“Alright buddy you’ve had enough. Walk it off.” Tony told him and he scowled but didn’t argue.

“I hope you know that you won’t get away with this! I’ll be pressing charges and that kid will go to someone better!” baseball cap called after them. Tony walked the blonde outside and noticed the blood on the blonde’s knuckles.

“You alright?” Tony asked and the blonde glared at him.

“Do I look alright?” he snapped and Tony shrugged.

“You look drunk, where’s your kid?”

“At home.”

“you left your kid alone at home?” Tony asked, suddenly feeling a little apprehensive to the blonde.

“Peter, he’s sixteen and his friends were coming over. there’s this girl he likes so I thought I’d give him the house and…” Blonde trailed off and shook his head.

“Teenager.” Tony said and Blonde nodded.

“Yeah, drives me crazy sometimes but I love him.” Tony looked down at the concrete between them.

“Thanks for coming to the funeral today.” Tony said and the guy tensed beside him.

“I’m sorry for your loss.” Tony’s head snapped up at that.

“How’d you know Uncle J?” Tony asked and blonde rose a brow.

“Uncle J?” he shook his head and Tony tilted his own.

“Something funny about that?”

“No it’s just, the Jarvis I knew wouldn’t answer to anything other than Jarvis.”

“Sounds like uncle J.” the night grew silent around them, Tony eyed his left hand where the knuckles had all split open.

-

“Jarvis was my neighbour.” Steve said at last, remembering that the brunette had originally asked Steve a question. His hands was killing him and he felt incredibly embarrassed for losing his temper. He hoped Benny would forget to lodge a complaint tomorrow, this would blow over. Peter would lose it at Steve if he knew. Steve had spent the whole afternoon in the cemetery with Peter, sitting at Peggy’s grave. Peter had told Steve he had friends coming over and Steve had said he’d stay out, Peter had argued but Steve had wanted a drink.

“You’re the neighbour?” Brunette asked and Steve nodded his head.

“I’m Steve.” He held out his hand and the brunette shook it.

“Tony.” Steve smiled and let his hand drop back to his side.

“Nice to meet you Tony.” His head was starting to pound and Tony’s eyes darted back down to Steve’s swollen and injured hand.

“Well, since we’re neighbours, walk back with me?” Tony asked and Steve nodded his head.

“Yeah, alright.” He glanced at his truck in the parking lot and Tony shook his head.

“Nope, you are in no state to drive and I’ve had one too many. Hand me your keys.” Steve rose a brow but did so.

“I wasn’t going to drive.” Steve told him and Tony nodded.

“Sure you weren’t. so were you close with uncle J?” Steve shook his head and they began to walk back home.

“No, he mostly kept to himself.” Tony nodded his head, there was a light breeze and it was warm. Nice weather for a walk.

“That’s uncle J, even I didn’t know him that well.” Steve nodded and then silence settled around them.

-

They arrived at Steve’s house and Tony noted that the lights were still on.

“Well, thanks for the walk.” Steve said and Tony nodded his head.

“Well we were going the same way. Put some ice on that hand.” Steve laughed and nodded.

“Yeah, will do, thanks for pulling me off the other guy, I’m not usually that aggressive.” Steve scratched the back of his head and Tony shrugged. He could already tell that, Steve seemed so calm and collected. He didn’t seem like the type of guy that just randomly exploded.

“Anytime.” Tony smiled and Steve nodded. A solid five seconds passed and Steve still didn’t move.

“my keys?” he asked and Tony felt his cheeks flame with embarrassment.

“oh, right, sorry.” He let out a nervous chuckle and dug through his pockets. He found the keys and handed them to Steve and Steve nodded.

“alright well, guess I’ll see you around?” Tony nodded his head.

“Yeah, see you around.” And then Tony headed back to his own personal monster house, suddenly not hating this town as much as he had originally.

[sharpen-jadescythe]

Operation Kitten, 1

Part One: The real story of what happened after Sharpen punched Mathias Shaw in the face. Continuation of the other SI:7 Seal story LOL

Jiroki, I’m sorry you had to find out this way. That the problem with Lux’ana Queenwing, a member of your guild posing as someone else? Yes, that can be traced back to me. But one upshot of this situation is, I finally get to be honest with you about something I was holding back. Not because I started things with us in a lie—no I would never do that unless lives depended on it. And they did, actually. I was protecting a lot of people so that’s why I didn’t tell you or anyone the full story, about me. Maybe that sounds like a lie a lover would tell you when he just happens to um, secretly be SI:7. Every time there’s a problem in your romance, he goes ‘Look baby, I had to lie to you in order to save lives.’ And I do know some agents like that. Those guys who use their jobs as an excuse, they’re filth. I guess if you think I’m filth too, I wouldn’t blame you. However, this is the truth. Alessandre and I were both trying to save Lux’ana’s life and the lives of her flock when she walked up to you that day and asked to join the Greyshields like it was nothing. Like Alessandre was just her friend and I had nothing to do with it. But it was part of a much bigger operation, love. Like you wouldn’t believe...

Al instructed me to pretend like I didn’t know Lux’ana, never met her. Al was going to serve as her reference. But now that cover of ours has unraveled some, and so much time has passed? I am going to tell you the truth. The real truth. Okay so, I’ll start at the beginning.

It's dangerous to talk about my work, so usually they give you a story to tell other people instead—not that this is it. I’m telling you everything, even my part in it. I’ve been called a himbo before, that sometimes I make dangerous or stupid decisions. But I see no point in lying to a woman I care so deeply for. I made some promises to you that I intend to keep. Just know that SI:7 gave me another version of my recruitment story, that I failed the swim test. That they threw me in a carriage for punching Mathias Shaw on the beach and sent me home. I embellished a little and said I got to keep the swim trunks. Because I look so damned fetching in that little blue and gold speedo, I guess my vanity sold me out a bit. It was a poor excuse for still having them anyway—as if SI:7, as powerful as that organization is, would let some recruit walk away with their standard issue uniform, even a… choice part of it, just to wear at pool parties. No, you can get picked up and arrested for that, seriously.

There’s a scene I was instructed to leave out, because my situation with them stayed tenuous even after my first mission. Yes, I did punch Mathias actually. That’s still true. But they didn’t give me a free ticket home with no muss nor fuss. That’s the part they asked me to tell my friends. What actually happened is they hogtied me, shipped me all the way out to Boralus which was the center of things at the time, then put me in a holding cell. After leaving me to cool down for a few days, they brought me before the man himself.

They brought me more standard issue stuff to wear, some loose cloth pants and a shirt. I was mad, and wanted some way to mess with them, so I ripped the shirt sleeves off. Which was a bit foolish, I guess. It does get pretty cold in Boralus. Shaw and the others had a barracks set up on the east side of town, close to the damp docks. Close to the Alliance ship docked there and all the cough-cough, handsome fair winds flowing in from the sea, if you know what I’m saying. (Fairshaw’s totally a thing, but you didn’t need an SI:7 Seal to reveal that secret to you. All I’m sayin’.)

To my surprise, they sent me in to see the head man without shackles on my wrists. I had a tight escort—this big Kul Tiran named Big Mack who took up almost the entire hallway, but I did also note that it was just one man and they’d fed me this whole time, treated me well, let me go out into the practice yard for exercise. They just didn’t let me mix with any of the other recruits. And another thing I noticed, all the people I’d trained with were gone. Even that annoying Dwarf guy Hael who couldn’t save himself in the water, let alone from being an obnoxious Dwarf stereotype, being loud and trying to get me drunk the night before the swim test and all that. (In fact, I think I remember telling him that, that he was playing up the Dwarf thing so much I was starting to wonder what he was trying to prove?) So anyway they dropped us all off the coast of Northrend, near Honor Hold, gave us the swim test and they all graduated, even that fool who tried to hang on my back like I was a Night Elf-sized wading board, and drown me in shark-infested waters? Geesh, what a world.

I teased Big Mack, said he looked like he wanted a sandwich. I mean, come on, how big did this guy really need to be?

“Hrmph. Need a third man for that, if it’s a real offer you’re making.”

I blinked. I… was Big Mack coming on to me? He laughed, and yes he did a good job of scaring the pants off me. Let’s not think about me, Big Mack and my pants off. Anyway…

Mostly, I was sullen. I hadn’t shaved in days. My green beard was scruffy and I knew my long dark green hair was kinda bedhead, too. If I didn’t get released right away, I was fully prepared to do something I promised myself I would never ever do, wherever I worked, no matter how tough things got—but damned if I was going to let them lock me up for no real reason, even if it was in the recruit’s barracks. If things were truly rough, then I was going to name drop my sister Wisthera Bane. They knew about her, of course, she was a master rogue in a leading Kaldorei spy organization. But they needed to understand that I was at the point of leveraging my sister and all her connections. Alessandre’s too, if I needed. He was a top assassin as I understood it. He helped run the Kaldorei Rogue Network with her, and they only really reported to High Priestess Tyrande and the Shando, Malfurion himself. Not the Alliance. Well, the Alliance wasn’t their first stop anyways. The Kaldorei people came first.

Big Mack rather roughly pulled out a metal chair for me and pointed with a meaty finger for me to sit. I had a little shock at first, seeing the important man I had punched waiting for me on the other side of the table. Arms crossed, that certain smirk on his face beneath that clipped brunette moustache, but this time, Mathias Shaw had a black eye. Well, it was more of a gray eye by now. The medics had it healing up nicely.

“You don’t just punch a man like Mathias Shaw in the face and get away with it.”

“Well.” I was stunned to be facing him. But I knew from our training that you never showed you were intimidated. However, I’d learned that from before in life anyway. “How do you punch a man like Mathias Shaw? Maybe next time I’ll stand my ground, should’ve stayed standing over you on the beach while you were flat out like a light.”

Mathias uncrossed his arms, sat up right in his chair. “Alright, Seal. You’ve had your word in. I’m letting you have your personality because it’s useful to us. Your freedom of speech in this situation is in my gift—you do get that, right?”

“I’m not an SI:7 Seal. I failed my test.”

“Did you, though?” Mathias cocked his head at me, smirking anew. So this was his revenge, the hitch. Why he was able to smile at me even with that black eye. Mathias was giving me the one thing that I hated most of all.

“I did so fail that swim test.”

“I’m not sure that’s how tests work? Right? I mean… doesn’t the teacher grade you? And if the teacher isn’t sure, then doesn’t the pass-fail decision fall to the headmaster? How exactly do those Kaldorei schools work, that you still don’t know?”

“Interesting line of inquiry, sir. But I’m immune to insults coming out of the mouth of a man that I punched.”

“Hold on now—we’re going in circles. Relax.”

I guess I did have my hackles all the way up already. I let my big shoulders sink down, took easier breaths. I glanced back over to see Big Mack still standing in the room by the door. I gave Mathias a look, that after everything, he wanted a bodyguard in my presence.

Shaw folded his hands on the table. “Yes, SI:7 has a reputation for letting some big arseholes in. Arseholes who bungle missions because they’re really in it for the gold, the chance to retire early after body-breaking work and then start up their own businesses. Security agencies and the like.”

“Yes! After only one year of service! Maybe two? But how does that serve the Alliance?”

Mathias nodded at me, that it was all true. But he also looked weary. That wasn’t a part of his organization, they way it was run, that he condoned. “If men get tired, we have to let them go. We can’t force them. And there’s this pipeline of ex-pats helping their buddies and the sons and daughters of their buddies to join up, just to make even more money. We’re trying to break that down from the inside. No offense, but Kaldorei don’t tend to rub each other’s backs like that. So, we’re aggressively recruiting your people. And before you think of threatening me with intervention from your sister in the Kaldorei Rogue Network, we know all about them. In fact, I made them, Wisthera and Alessandre. And the third triumvir rogue, Mistress Myrielle Fadeleaf? I trained her as well.”

I pointed his way, “Not how my sister tells it.”

He rolled his eyes, “Anyway. You’re young, you’re new to spywork. And seems it runs in your family. We recruited you because of your sister, Sharpen. You’re not going to catch us out with that, it was one of the main reasons. SI:7 didn’t go into it blindly.”

“But you just said!” I floundered for a moment, realizing my parachute was gone. “Corruption, back-scratching is rife in SI:7! That whole recruitment experience—nightmare—is not something I want to repeat in the field. I won’t serve!”

Mathias stayed calm, sucked his teeth and looked up thoughtfully before he spoke. Like he was indulging me. “Now. I don’t want to call you a himbo. I don’t wanna hurt your feelings. But let’s say that, unlike your sister, you are a man who would take orders. You would do it for the greater good, you would be incorruptible in that way. Sharpen, didn’t I just explain to you that I’m sick of the bad guys inside our organization? I want a real man. You.” He pointed at me with both hands, thumbs up like he was attempting to sell me a horse, fast. “You are a real man, Sharpen Jadescythe. A man we can depend on.”

[laws-yellow-submarine]

Can you do NSFW alphabet with Ace?

Hi anon! I went ahead and did the whole alphabet again this time, but I think in the future I’m gonna have to just take up to 5 letters 😅 this takes more time than I thought it would. I hope you enjoy though! 😊

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

Ace is very affectionate after sex (all the time, to be perfectly honest), so he’s very good about checking to make sure you’re ok after sex, whether it was tame or rough, and will usually want to cuddle afterwards, at least until he falls asleep.

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Ass for both.  He’s likely to grab your ass without even thinking about it, it’s not even always sexual; he just grabs it for comfort, like a stuffed animal. He really likes it when you feel comfortable enough to do the same for him (though he is more likely to get teased by his crew members for having you grab his ass than you would be).

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)

He’s a gremlin who barely even cleans the cum off himself before relaxing for bed. Please spray him with a hose.

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

The first time he had sex he got so excited he set the bed on fire.

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

Ace isn’t actually all that experienced; other than maybe fooling around with a few girls here and there, he hasn’t gotten seriously involved with anyone until you.

F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual)

Ace doesn’t necessarily prefer one position over another, he just wants to be close to you; close enough to wrap his arms around you if he wants, reach any bit of skin he wants, kiss all over your body...that kind of close.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

He is so goofy, he’ll be laughing and making jokes and teasing all the way up until you’re naked in front of him, and then he just becomes a flustered mess who can’t believe this wonderful being is right in front of him for him to consume however he sees fit, and he’ll turn suddenly very serious about what you’re doing.

H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

It’s a bit of a mess down there, but if you ask nicely (and if it’s your preference) he can be persuaded to at least trim it back a bit.

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…) 

He’s surprisingly tender. This boy doesn’t do one-night stands, so when he commits to having sex with you it means so much more than that, and he’ll let you feel it. 

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

Ace may be inexperienced with actual people, but he’s no stranger to masturbation. Back on the gremlin note though, a word of caution: wash his sheets before you start sleeping with him

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

Nipple stimulation, temperature play, orgasm control (on him, not his partner. He can switch between being dominant and submissive, but he prefers you to be in control, at least during foreplay), is also really turned on by thigh high socks/stockings

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)

He’s not very adventurous when it comes to location, preferring his bedroom above all else. It’s not always necessarily in the bed, but it’s at least in his room. Also is willing to have sex in the shower.

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

Grabbing his ass may not always be an inherently sexual act, but it can very easily lead to other fun activities depending on time, place, and conversation. Also loves lingerie (though sometimes thinks it’s too pretty to take off); placing kisses along his chest, collar bone, and neck is also a surefire way to get him going (no pun intended)

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Won’t have sex where others could easily walk in on you. Also if you call him Daddy he gets grumpy, so please leave the poor boy with daddy issues alone.

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

Prefers to receive; will literally just throw his head back and let you work him over. When it comes to giving he’s more a fan of 69, especially so he can feel the vibrations from your moans while you’re giving him head.

P = Pace (Are they fats and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

Foreplay tends to be slower paced, since he’s trying to savor every second with you, but once he really starts going he speeds up quite a bit.

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

He’s not opposed to quickies, but be warned he falls asleep pretty quickly after sex so he won’t go for it very often. Would much prefer to take a lazy afternoon for you to just ravish each other.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

He’s pretty risky, preferring to go bare. He trusts you though, so as long as any birth control is covered by you, he’s not worried about anything else. Worst case scenario, he swallows his pride and asks Marco for help.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

Ace lasts a somewhat decent amount, and can go at least a couple rounds before he passes out. As long as he’s still being stimulated he’s better able to keep his narcolepsy at bay.

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

He doesn’t own any himself, but he’s more than willing to use them on you if you show him what to do with them first. Doesn’t really want anything used on himself though.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

His teases are more verbal than anything, meant to get a rise out of you so you’ll throw yourself at him. Physically he’s not one for teasing, he’d rather get to the main event.

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

This boy is loud. The closer he gets to climax, the louder and louder he gets, and eventually the whole ship can probably hear him. It’s mostly just a long chant of “Oh my god” and your name. 

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

Ace has freckles all over his body, and one of the easiest ways to make him blush (and get him hard) is to trace over them; whether it be with your fingers, your lips, or your tongue.

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

His penis is on the thicker side, average length, and veiny.

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

He could mostly keep himself in check before he met you, but after getting into a relationship it’s like his body is on overdrive. He could easily go a round or two every day if you wanted to.

Z = ZZZ (�� how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Once sex is over and he’s checked to make sure you’re ok, he passes right the fuck out. He doesn’t need to sleep for long at least.

[newcaptainofsquad9]

Notice Me!~Kim Junmyeon/Suho x Black! R&B Star! Fem! Reader {2}

Previous Parts: 1  2 3

Pairing: Suho x reader

Summary: With your support sent out to EXO as a fan and a potential collaborator, you awaken to a massive wave of support from your fans, along with fellow EXOls. However, a vocal majority of them aren’t too keen about you working with their bias band. All of this anxiety comes to a head as your supports push you towards the idea of a collaboration, including Suho himself.  

Warnings: Toxic fans, racist comments and negative thoughts. 

Writer’s Note: Here’s chapter 2, I hope you guys enjoy and let me know if you want any more EXO fics/series, requests are open! I also want to add that this is purely fictional, I don’t know Halsey (Ashley) personally, so if she acts a little odd I’m sorry. And another thing about this fic and others I write, the Kpop idols speak English, since I don’t want to butcher any translations or Korean words, since I do not speak the language. Maybe in the future, but not now! Thanks!  

Word Count: 1, 583

I could hardly sleep at the sound of my phone buzzing like a madman. Of course the sun peaking through my blinds didn’t help, along with Ashley’s bed hogging ass. Next time I’m taking the couch instead of sharing my bed, jeez. 

I shift over on my back to reach for my phone, it comes to life at my slight touch and overwhelms me with so many notifications I almost tumble from the bed. 

“Mmh,” Ashley groans, “quit moving.” 

She kicks my foot softly, but I don’t react at all, most of my attention is on my phone. 

My Twitter bell icon stays red with a swarm of notifications, messages, likes and retweets. I’m trending, right underneath with EXO and of course BTS. 

“Uh, Ash, look! Look!”

I nudge her a few times before she rolls over with hair stuck to her cheek and a scowl. 

“Y/N, I-I need at least one more hou—”

“Look!” I scold.

We both stay captivated by the tiny screen as Ashley’s finger scrolls down some of the comments. 

They read:

Um, SM we need a Empress Dee Dee/ EXO collab, stat!

Aw, Junmyeon was soo cute, I lowkey ship it!

Finally a Kpop band reaching out for a black artist, I wish someone would follow through too *cough, cough BTS

“Holy shit,” Ashley says, “they really love this idea, did your publicist call you about it yet? Y/N?”

Her voice is drowned out as more of the comments turn sour. 

A lot of them read:

Western Artist X Kpop Artist= trash

Black people should stay with their own music, it wouldn’t mix with EXO’s sound

Gross, please don’t tell me Junmyeon has a thing for that black girl, why not a Korean woman?

They continue to flood my feed, most of them turning more daunting than the rest. 

“Ok, enough Twitter for one morning,” Ashley says as she takes the phone. 

“You’re right,” I say, “I need some more sleep.”

Ashley frowns as I lay back against my pillow and yank the covers up and over my face. 

“Y/N, come on,” Ashley groans, “you seriously gonna let these assholes get under your skin?”

I nod against the sheets. 

“Half of them are right Ash,” I say, “why would any of EXO collab with me? There are many other Kpop artists who are better anyway.”

“Um, but none of them are Empress Dee Dee, are they?” Ashley asks.

I shrug. 

“They aren’t black though, Ash,” I note. 

Ashley gives me an incredulous look. 

“That’s got nothing to do with it,” Ashley growls. 

Her words strike an unexpected nerve within me as I push the covers away and sit back up.

“Nothing?! “ I snap, “Ash, it’s everything to do with it! Racism still exists, even more prevalent now, especially with colorism still at an all time high!”  

Ashley frowns. 

“But I-”

I put a hand on Ashley’s own, the stark contrast of my brown skin and her pale one. 

“I know, I know who are Ashley, but it’s different for women like me, and darker skinned black women,” I say, “I just need you to understand that, please.”

Ashley nods. 

“I do,” she says, “but I need you to understand that it shouldn’t stop you! Don’t listen to what those assholes are saying!”

“Ash—”

“You love music, don’t you?” she asks. 

Her question throws me off, yet I nod anyway. 

“Of course I do,” I say. 

“Then focus on making music, talk to your publicist and agent about that EXO collab!” she declares.

I watch Ashley in half awe, half amusement as she tosses the sheets onto the floor like the drama queen she’s being. Maybe she should shoot for the Academy Awards rather than Grammys next year. 

“You know you gotta pick that up right,” I deadpan while gesturing to the splayed mess of covers below us on the floor. 

Ashley turns her nose up, but softens as she comes around to my side of the bed, sitting next to me and taking my hand.

“Don’t worry about the fucking bed spread and listen to me,” she says. 

I stare at her eyes, there’s this hint of desperation in them, as if I was the one who insulted her. Maybe I was a bit too much in my feelings. She cares about my wellbeing so much that I forget this affects her as well. 

“Promise me that you’ll stay all right through all of this,” she says, gripping my hand skin tight. 

I think of another comeback but save it for later.

“I promise Ash,” I vow, “now can you pick up the damn covers?”

Ashley frowns but rises to gather up the covers anyway.

“There. I’m doing it, now could you please call your publicist?”

A heavy sigh escapes my lips as I reach for my phone on the nightstand. More notifications flood, a few missed calls from Daphne, my publicist and Todd, my agent. Great, now I have to deal with them. 

“I’m calling them back now, Ash,” I announce.

“Awesome,” she calls from the bathroom. 

I decide to go with Todd first, since he left the most missed calls. My heart beats heart against the insistent ring of the phone, it drawing out a bit longer than it usually should. 

“Hello, Y/N!” Todd calls. 

I gulp before speaking.

“Hi Todd, look I-I know I should have contacted Daph first about posting that tweet.”

Todd chuckles through the phone. 

“Y/N, that was a genius move! It seemed really genuine!” he exclaims.

I frown.

“Uh, I was completely genuine Todd, my heart was one hundred percent into it,” I say. 

“Oh, well that makes it even better, because I’ve already got in contact with the producers on the Ellen Show, and since EXO will be there promoting Obsession, we can finally have you both in talks for a collaboration!”

My stomach nearly drops. It’s exciting news, right? Getting to meet my bias band in front of me instead of a tiny computer screen, yet the circumstances got me worried. In front of all those people. Some of them could be any of those people spouting out hateful comments. 

“Er, Y/N,” Todd says, “you heard me, right?”

“I-I u-uh yeah!” I say, “j-just uh, fan girl nerves is all.”

Todd chuckles, but gets back to business as usual.

“No need to worry, it’s all scripted and Ellen has a way of making people calm, especially new guests,” he explains, “but this will really put you on the map! Considering you haven’t made a public appearance since your grammy snub and you’re gonna do it with one of the biggest kpop groups, ever! Don’t let those fangirl nerves get to you too much!”

I manage to cough up a tiny giggle. 

“Of course Todd, thank you.”

“Already have a flight set up for you in the morning, I told you that you’d skyrocket soon, didn’t I?” he asks. 

I roll my eyes but agree anyway.

“I know Todd, bye.”

“Get plenty of sleep, call me when you get there!” he urges before hanging up.

WIth him off the phone I can finally freak out in peace. Well until Ashley returns with her toothbrush a nosy look on her face. 

“Shit, by that face I’m assuming it didn’t go well, did it?” she asks. 

I shake my head and collapse backwards against the sheets. 

“I-It went unexpectedly well,” I admit, “EXO’s gonna be on Ellen for the first time, and I got a spot on there with them.” 

Ashley nearly jumps into the ceiling. 

“Are you fucking serious?!” she exclaims, “it hasn’t even been 24 hours yet!”

I nod against my pillow. 

“Right! God, I-I’m not ready for this,” I groan. 

Ashley shifts closer to wrap an arm around my shoulder.

“You got this sweetie,” she whispers, “I’m gonna take the shower first, that cool with you?”

I nod as she rises. 

“Oh and stay off Twitter,” she says as she goes back to the bathroom. 

Of course I don’t listen as I unlock my phone yet again. My eyes scan through all of the comments: good, bad, ugly and downright unnecessary. My finger stops at a previous V Live EXO recently did, or a clip at least. 

The caption of the video read:

Ya’ll Junmyeon is really out here caring about DeeDee, like a lot! When he gonna pull up 😂😂

I click it and there’s Suho, Baekhyun and Chen with soft looks, unlike the way they looked during their X-EXO concept stage. Beakhyun leans closer to the camera, scanning the comments I assume as Suho frowns. 

“Of course not!” Suho growls, “why would anyone say that?”

“What is it hyung?” Chen asks. 

Suho points at the screen. 

“Someone said that we thought DeeDee was ugly, why would you insult a beautiful woman like that?” he asks in disgust.

My breath gets hitched in my throat at his words. 

Baekhyun frowns this time.

“Aw, why are people making fun of DeeDee?” he groans, “don’t listen to them DeeDee! Stay strong! Keep smiling!!”

Chen nods sharply as Baekhyun continues to yell it obnoxiously.

Suho pushes him until he ceases and looks into the camera intensely. 

“The people who are saying this aren’t our fans, DeeDee,” he explains, “you’re amazing, stay all right, ok? Ok!”

Suho grins as he puts up his finger hearts as his smile widens.

The video ends, yet it doesn’t within my head. EXO actually stood up for me. This has got to be a dream. 

[teampandawang]

26 REASONS TO LOVE MIN YOONGI

We are so grateful for being able to celebrate this precious lil’ bean birthday. We love him so much.

We hope you enjoy it!

AGUST D

The bad guy side of Yoongi. This man made us all his bitches in the Agust D MV, and we’re not even complaining. But leaving his sexiness aside (just for a while, ‘cause damn) let’s talk about how creative this name is. It is a reference to his stage name with BTS ‘Suga’ and his city, the place that made him who he is, we just love it.

MIN YOONGI

There are different sides of him and we learned to see and love all of them. Suga is that talented man that kills us with his stage presence every time we see him doing his work, and Min Yoongi is the sweet boy who once felt insecure about life, but now is living his dream, being the person he always wanted to be.

RAP SKILLS

This is the whole truth: He is one of THE BEST rappers from this era. His skills are something out of this world. This man was born to do this, and he knows it because we all can see how much passion he feels doing it.

DANCING

Continuing with the serious tone, BOY CAN DANCE. Just go see one of his fancams. He has improved a lot in his skills.

PRODUCER

Let’s don’t forget the number of BTS’ songs he produced, along with the ones he made for other singers like Suran’s If I Get Drunk Today or the collaboration with Lee Sora in Song Request. He is an amazing songwriter and producer, full of passion for his job.

PIANO

The melodies he can create with it can light up your day and make it rain in the same second. They are just beautiful masterpieces that bless our ears.

TONGUE TECHNOLOGY

That thing with his mouth isn’t just about his skills as the amazing rapper he is. When he’s performing he sticks out his tongue and immediately he becomes the sexiest men alive.

GUMMY SMILE

If you tell that this is not the sweetest smile you have seen, we won’t believe you. His gummy smile might be the most adorable thing in this world. Is so full of happiness and somehow innocence, what a charm.

SQUISHY

Let’s make a point here: who does he think he is? He is around with that badass attitude sometimes but with his squishy little face is just almost impossible to take it completely seriously, he is just too cute.  

TINY

And continuing with the previous point, the size difference between him and the rest of the members don’t help his serious expression, he is so soft and tiny that it melts our heart. Let’s cry together...

POKER FACE

But for hell sure that he can look like a rock if he wants to. But let’s clarify something: there is absolutely nothing wrong with having a poker face most of the time. We all have different ways of expressing our feelings and emotions, just like him. 

SCREAMS

But he can be LOUD, like really loud. When he is in the mood there is no one and nothing capable of stopping him. Like those high-pitch screams that he makes when he is excited or the noisy ones he makes to hype the other members:  

J-HOPEEEEEEEEEEEE!! 

SAVAGE

This is part of his charms. His comebacks are GREAT. He always has some acid comment to spice things up and make ARMY and the members laugh at his occurrence. His entire presence says SAVAGE, is just part of his swag.

DAD FEELINGS

He is such a caring person, he just doesn’t show it explicitly, but once you understand his way to show love to those he cares about, you see just how sweet and protective he actually is, especially with his younger members, those he feels he kind of raise. 

IN YOUR NEXT LIFE...

He looks so grumpy sometimes. Even though, he said he wanted to be a rock in his next life. A MF ROCK!!! It’s just because he’s lazy and wants to lay down the whole day.

SKINSHIP

He has said more than once that he is not into skinship, but PLEASE, we know that’s not entirely true. He loves taking the other members’ hands in his, he is    s o f t.  

SLEEPY

Who can blame him? Sleeping is one of the guilty pleasures of this world. It’s the most perfect thing to do. And taking in count how much does he work, HE DESERVES IT af.

HAIR COLORS

We have seen every possible color in his hair, but a funny thing about it is how (involuntarily, as he said once) he managed to match his hair color with the album cover he is promoting at the moment. 

SATOORI

Don’t you feel attacked with his Daegu accent? Btw, that features on the way he talks makes him even cute, it’s something traditional that we as foreigners, can find cool.

KICKS

This is one of his inexplicable features when he’s performing or on the MV’s. We don’t know if we are the only ones that had noticed it, but he has a strange obsession about doing this kind of little kicks. Btw, he doesn’t look aggressive, just cute.

PRE-DEBUT

I totally believe that every ARMY needs to see his audition video for BigHit, it’s meme gold. Seriously, you won’t regret it.  But jokes aside, he had a rough time then, but he overcame his issues with the support of the fandom and his members. He is a perfect example of how things can truly get better, so everybody out there.

Keep going, you can find happiness! 

RAP LINE

We ain’t gonna lie: BTS’ rap line is AMAZING. They sweat talent. Each of them has their own style and they make it fit perfectly in their songs. Masterpieces like Ddaeng need more attention, not just because it is fire, but also ‘cause its genius lyrics.  

TAE’S LOVE LETTER

There is a really special video, the BTS Dinner Party, where Tae revealed that Yoongi once sent him a long message saying that he loves him (Jungkook also received such message from him). This is just proof of the taste of how sweet this precious man is. Always grateful and full of love. 

SOPE

This is THE ship. The way Yoongi’s attitude and energy change when Hoseok is around is heartwarming. He feels happier and more excited when his sunshine is around. They complement each other perfectly. 

SHOOKY

This tiny friend is the exact representation of him. Hope y’all are giving this precious character the love they deserve.

BTS

And finally, he is part of BTS. It means something different for everyone, for ones it means the group composed by 7 talented men who make really good music, and for others is an angel’s hand that came to save us from the dark room we all have to surpass. But we can agree on one thing: They deserve all the success and love they are receiving.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, YOONGS!

Thank you for all your hard work and those inspiring songs. Hope you know that ARMY is here for you and the rest of the members, and we will support you no matter what as long as you’re happy, that’s all we want.

[thejakeformerlyknownasprince]

What if Ax joined the team in the first book?

[Someone asked me what would happen if Ax joined the team at the same time as everyone else.  Whoever it was: sorry that I lost your ask; drop me a line so I can credit your idea.]

When Aximili asks to come along for the fight, Elfangor — against his better judgment — relents.  «Stay close,» he says, and «Don’t touch anything.»

«Yes, Prince Elfangor,» Aximili says.

Elfangor flashes him a quick smile, stalk eyes only.  The use of the title shows that Aximili understands the seriousness of the situation.  This is no driftball game where they can argue over the rules.  This is combat, and thus Elfangor’s word must be law.

Elfangor knows he made the right call.  That Aximili is mature enough to be cabin boy (as the humans would say) for the GalaxyTree.  He was right to insist to his captain that his little brother is ready for combat, aristh or no.  And he proves to be right in letting Aximili come along in his fighter.  Otherwise, Elfangor is reasonably certain, Aximili would have perished along with the rest of their crew.

It’s mere seconds into the battle that the Blade ship’s dracon cannon strikes the Dome ship square in its broadside.  Mere minutes that pass between the T.O. first spotting the yeerks and a thousand warriors crying out in a single thought-speak shout of despair, only to be horribly silenced.

In that moment, Elfangor’s mind races in a dozen directions at once: Andalite fighters aren’t equipped for planetary landfall.  The Time Matrix is down there on that planet.  The G-force of attempting to reach it could kill them both.  There’s an Escafil device stored in his fighter’s center console.  The yeerks are on Earth.  Loren is on Earth.  Tobias is on Earth.  Aximili is right here in the fighter with him, sharing the risk and the blame if anything goes wrong.  The Time Matrix... The G-force... The Blade ship... The humans...

Elfangor makes an impossible choice, because all the choices are impossible.  «Strap in,» he tells Aximili.  «Brace for impact.»

Aximili doesn’t ask.  Doesn’t point out that Elfangor’s out of his mind.  Instead, he scrambles for the crash harness.

A nudge of the controls.  Almost slowly, almost gently, the little fighter surrenders to the planet’s gravity well.  It tilts.  It slides.  And it starts to accelerate.

Elfangor yanks back on the thrusters with all his strength, even as the hydraulics scream at him and the craft judders with hull-cracking force.  They are become a meteor, arcing across Earth’s sky in a jet trail of flames.

Bracing all four hooves against the floor, Elfangor struggles for fast calculations of half-remembered geography.  That’s North America... That’s the west coast... No, no, further south, struggling to force the craft to obey... That patch of light must be Los Angeles... That satellite is San Diego...

Aximili is whispering the oaths to prince and people and honor, the oaths repeated before death.  He does not have to do it so that Elfangor can hear, and yet he seems to want to share this small comfort before the end.

Elfangor slams the secondary braking system into place.  The craft goes from thousands of miles an hour to mere hundreds in half a second.  Gravity flips sickeningly.

Aximili, safe in the harness, gets jarred but nothing else.  Elfangor, who had no time to join him, slams into the far wall with a breath-destroying crunch.  He staggers to his feet, weak gasps of pain escaping without his permission.  He’s bleeding internally, ribs broken, his lower heart sending out horrible judders of pain with every beat.  He remains hopeful, however — until he looks down and sees a wasteland of concrete and half-finished buildings where an empty field should be.  «No,» he whispers, helpless.  «No.»

«Elfangor...?»  Aximili’s voice is so tentative it verges on inaudible.

Elfangor is staring at the nav screen showing a familiar set of coordinates and also at the fifteen feet of solid cement between him and the Time Matrix.  Still, a part of him refuses to believe.

He lands anyway.  Stumbles out, just to be sure — and finds himself face-to-face with five human children.  Five children on a planet on the brink of subjugation.  Five children surrounded by threats on all sides and yet unknowing and defenseless.  Five children, one of whom has Loren’s wide grey eyes and soft yellow hair and the round-shouldered build of a long-lost human named Alan Fangor.

«Aximili,» Elfangor says.  The yeerks are coming.  Visser Three will kill him, either now or after the kind of hunt that will tear this planet apart.  Better to let it happen now.  Better to use these last moments to give Earth a fighting chance.  «Come out here.  Bring the Escafil device.»

Ax is reeling, spinning, too far into shock to take it all in.  Elfangor is dead.  Dead because of Visser Three, the Abomination.  Dead partially by his own choice, as well.  Because when Ax tried to insist that they stay and fight, or that they morph and run, Elfangor held up a hand to stop him.

«Aximili, I can’t explain everything right now, but this is what has to be done.»  His private thought-speak was rushed, harried.  «I need you to go with Tobias and the others.  They’ll keep you safe.  And they’ll need you to guide them.»

«I can’t do this,» Aximili had whispered.  «I don’t know enough, I don’t know how...»

«Aristh Aximili, formerly of the GalaxyTree, formerly of Mother and Father’s awful lopsided scoop they’ll never get around to fixing.»  There had been a catch of emotion to Elfangor’s voice, thought-speak letting more leak through than the words alone.

Aximili felt himself go cold all over, knees locking, breath struggling with unshed tears.  He understood a field promotion when he heard one.  He knew what was coming.

«I hereby relinquish my command to you, Prince Aximili.  I do so in utmost trust that you will serve our cousins faithfully, both on the homeworld and here, though we are far from home.»  Elfangor bowed his head.  «I am the servant of the People. I am the servant of my prince.»  He lifted his eyes to look straight at Aximili, leaving no chance that he could be referring to their captain.  «I am the servant of honor. My life is not my own, when the People have need of it. My life is given for the People, for my prince, and for my honor.»

It went against everything they’d been taught, but Aximili allowed the tears to fall then.  He’d listened, one last time, when Elfangor told him to take the humans and run.  To flee this place and not look back.  To avoid knowing what was going to happen next.

They take Ax (they call him Ax; he doesn’t care) back to the house of the human called Jake.  Ax staggers along, awkward on two legs.  He acquired the human called Tobias, for now.  Later, he will have to make himself a properly unique human morph, but for now he’s too sick at hearts to perform a proper frolis maneuver.

The humans were very concerned with putting artificial skins on Ax’s human shape; the two females refused even to look at him until he wore a windbreaker from the human called Jake and the human called Rachel had fashioned him a sarong of sorts from her overshirt.

“My parents are going to think that Tobias is a raging nutjob, but that’s okay because they’ve never met him before,” Jake says, by way of apology.

“Nutjob.  Nut.  T-t.  T-job.”  Ax understands most of the words, but for those two.  It’s comforting, even in this strange shape, to allow the dual click of his human tongue: once at the very front of his mouth for T, once further back for J.  “T... Tuh.  Juh.  T’Juh.”  The repeated motion calms him, keeps him from thinking.

“Yep, you’re really proving my point right about now.”  With a sigh, Jake pushes the front door open.

Jake shepherds Ax up to his room after a bare minimum of interaction with the rest of the family.  He offers a padded tube known as a sleeping bag (Ax declines) and assures Ax more than once that they’ll work out a better solution tomorrow.  Ax finds the human dwelling strange and uncomfortable; it is all blocky angles and enclosing walls.  He cannot even see the stars, and the thick fabric covering the floor proves to be inedible.  After demorphing, he folds himself into a  corner to try and sleep.

At first Jake asks many questions: about Elfangor, about morphing, about yeerks and controllers.  Ax does his best to answer without giving too much away.  Finally Jake’s voice tapers off, his breathing becomes slow, and he starts to make a steady noise that Ax will later learn is called snoring.

Ax tries to sleep.  He lists z-space theorems in his mind, breathes slowly, tries to think of nothing.  He recites the ritual of death.  Recites it again.  Continues to turn the phrases over in his mind.  Hoping that soon they will take on meaning and cease to be mere words.

They are both awakened the next morning by a staccato tap tap tap against Jake’s window.  Jake sits upright, rubbing at his eyes.  “What the...?”

There is a small quadruped balancing on his windowsill, batting at the glass with one front paw.  «Let me in, would you?» says the quadruped, in a voice that Ax recognizes as Tobias’s.  «I’m still learning how to balance as a cat, and it took me forever to get here.»

With an ease startling to Ax, Jake rolls to his feet and shoves the window open with strong human arms.  “How are you doing this?” he asks.

«How long have you been in morph?» Ax says over him, alarmed.  Elfangor told the aliens about the time limit last night, and Ax emphasized it again after they left the construction site.  This kind of behavior — morphing unsupervised, using an untested animal, failing to track the time — is shockingly careless.

«Not sure.»  Tobias drops lightly to the ground.  «This is hands-down the coolest thing I have ever experienced.  I don’t know how you andalite types ever get anything done, with this kind of fun to distract you —»

«Demorph immediately!»  Ax speaks so sharply that both Jake and Tobias stare at him.

«Okay, but I’m kinda naked—»

«It is imperative that you demorph!  Do you wish to become a nothlit?»

«Fine, fine,» Tobias says.  To Ax’s enormous relief, he is resuming his human form as he speaks.  «What’s a nothlit?»

Jake removes some artificial skins from the much smaller room adjacent to his desk and hands them to Tobias.

«A nothlit is a person who has become trapped in morph and cannot resume andalite shape,» Ax says.  «The process is irreversible.  Fifteen percent of andalites in the first generation ever to morph suffered this fate.  It is the terrible price of this gift.»

“Huh.”  Tobias finishes pulling one of Jake’s garments over his head.  “And then what happens to them?”

«They are trapped.  Unable to demorph.  Forever.»

“Yeah, but I assume you, like, accommodate them as animals or whatever, right?  You said fifteen percent of some groups.  So there’s probably a lot of people like that, and you probably have some fancy tech to help them do stuff, right?”  Tobias’s eyes are wide in what Ax is beginning to recognize as a human expression of hopefulness.

Ax shifts position on the carpet.  «No.  Not really.  They are usually secluded from society.»

“What, just because they’re stuck as cats forever?”

«They are vecols.»  Seeing Tobias’s confusion, Ax clarifies, «warriors who are permanently wounded.  It is best to allow them their privacy, apart from mainstream andalite society.»

“Separate but equal, huh?” Jake says, a darkness to his tone that Ax does not understand.

«Yes, exactly,» Ax says.

Tobias and Jake look at each other.  Tobias makes a wordless sound in the back of his throat.

“So much for the superior alien society coming to enlighten us,” Jake mutters.

«It is for their own good,» Ax tries to explain.

“Oh, so you polled every single one of them, and they prefer the ghettos to —”  Jake cuts himself off.  “Okay, this is not what we need to talk about.  Aliens.  Yeerks.  Let’s go get the others, yeah?”

The next few days are... overwhelming.  All of them assemble near the home of the human called Cassie, in a space filled several other species of Earth animal.  They have questions for Ax, dozens of questions, and they talk over each other in their eagerness to learn about andalites and thought-speak, interstellar travel and dracon beams.  Marco and Cassie want to recuse themselves from the war entirely, while Tobias and Rachel want to throw themselves headlong into the fight with an eagerness that shows they don’t truly understand how hopeless the fight will be.

Ax does his best to tell them what he can, while keeping state secrets to himself.  He reminds them time and again to be careful when morphing, because it’s the only thing he knows that they must be told.

He doesn’t know how to lead them.  He’s not qualified to be a war-prince.  He has no idea how to balance Seerow’s Kindness against their demands to understand why their home is being invaded and destroyed.

In the end, Tobias helps Ax set up a scoop in the woods.  Jake’s appalled at the idea of Ax being alone out there with no human domicile, but eventually Ax succeeds in impressing on him that this is what he wants.  Finally he wins them over.  It’s a relief, to be out in woods that are not quite familiar but nevertheless closer to what he knows from the homeworld.  It gives him the chance to be alone, away from the aliens and the infinite answers he doesn’t have for them.

All of the humans come by with gifts for his scoop: books, a small television, magazines and newspapers, a material called plywood that keeps out the rain.  Marco provides several cans of a delicious substance known as Spam, and an even more delicious condiment known as kerosene.  Their worry is... touching.  But Ax also suspects it is not right.  A prince should look after his warriors, not the other way around.

At their next team meeting, Ax walks in to find an ongoing argument between Marco and Jake.

“You don’t have any proof,” Jake is saying.

“That cop knew him.”  Marco crosses his arms. “That cop, who was definitely a controller, was like ‘oh, you’re Tom Berenson’s brother?  Never mind then.’  Not to mention the fact that you said yourself he’s been acting weird.  And yeah, him deciding to give us the ninth degree about UFOs and how we know Tobias was really fucking weird.  So you just don’t want to admit that your brother —”

Which is when Jake hits Marco across the face with a closed fist.  Marco staggers back a step, cursing and cupping his jaw.

“Stop!” Cassie shouts.

Marco presses the heel of his hand to his swelling lower lip.  “Tell me I’m wrong,” he spits.  “Tell me the Sharing isn’t sketchy as hell.  Tell me the way he talks about it is totally normal.  Go ahead.  Look me in the eye and tell me you actually believe that.”

Jake is gasping for air, face flushed, staring around himself as if lost.  His knuckles are bleeding.  “Ax,” he says.  “Ax, I’d know, right?  I’d be able to tell if — If —”

They’re talking about Jake’s older brother.  Ax briefly met the human in question on that first night, and didn’t get much of an impression one way or another.  “I don’t know,” he says at last, very slowly.  “I have not known... nnnnooonne... any controllers.  Oll-lers.  The yeerks can access all the memories of their hosts, so it would be possible... ssssib-bble...”

“Possible.”  Jake takes a breath.  “Possible.  But not guaranteed.  So we... we use this morphing thing.  We go to a Sharing meeting, and we prove that there’s nothing wrong with the Sharing, because Tom would never get involved with a yeerk organization.  In the process, we prove that there’s nothing wrong with Tom.”

It occurs to Ax that he shouldn’t allow his team to take this kind of risk, especially not for the sake of a single human who is likely lost to yeerk control already.  He knows, too, that Jake may even be right about his brother being unlikely to join the yeerks willingly, but that it makes little difference if so.

Only, the thing is, it occurs to Ax as well to wonder what he would do if it was Elfangor who’d been taken.

“We can do this,” he says aloud.  “Th—ssssss.  But we must be careful.”

Ax’s suspicions about Marco’s suspicions prove to be correct.  Tom, and most of the Sharing’s other full members, are in fact controllers.  Jake proves to be right as well that Tom isn’t voluntary, sparse consolation though it is.  Ax doesn’t like Jake’s plan to go charging down to the yeerk pool to free Tom and the other hosts, but this is a human affair and perhaps a human decision.  So he goes along with them to acquire DNA — and when Cassie gets taken, he commits fully to leading his first-ever battle.

“Tobias has been in morph for kind of a while, right?” Jake asks Ax as they walk to the middle school.

Ax has warned Tobias already about timing; he doesn’t feel capable of doing it again.  “I am sure that Tobias knows how to be safe,” he says.

Ax has read about battle.  Studied it extensively.  Listened to Elfangor’s stories, asking incessant questions.  Learned all the theories.  Even watched holos of famous fights.  In short, he is as prepared as it is possible for an untested aristh to be.

He knows nothing of war.

The battle happens all at once, from more directions than even he can watch with stalk eyes scanning frantically all around him.  Humans and animals and hork-bajir and taxxon clash and scream, shoot and claw and die.  Blood slicks the floor, spilled kandrona slopping over the sides of the pool as bodies crash down among the yeerks.  He doesn’t know who is a controller, who is a host, who is a friend or an enemy.

Hork-bajir charge him, dozens of blades at the ready.  He bashes them back with frantic graceless tail swings.  A taxxon is already down, intestines spilling across the floor, before he has time to plan the strike.  No time to think.  No time to feel.  Exhaustion and foreign gravity drag him down.

He’s going to die down here.  He’s going to die like his brother, slaughtered on an alien planet and devoured.  He’s going to die, and his parents will never learn what happened to either of them.

«Ax! Ax!»

He strikes at the shape.  Luckily fatigue slows his swing.  Luckily Jake ducks with cat reflexes.  Too late he registers blood-matted orange fur.

«We’re losing ground,» Jake says, gasping for air.  «Time to get the hell out of here while we still can.»

«But...»  Ax is crazy; why is he objecting?  «But we haven’t saved anyone... We haven’t...»

«This is— Ax, we stay, we die.»  He’s right.  He’s right.

«We go, then,» Ax says.  He’s a failure.  A coward.  He’s running from his duty.  If Elfangor knew— «Everyone!  We have to go!» Ax shouts.

Rachel raises her trunk, bellowing.  She shoulders aside controllers and hosts alike, clearing a path for the rest of them.  She’s not going to make the stairs, not with that bulk.  Marco is loping behind her, but Cassie is pinned down by three hork-bajir clear across the room.  There’s no sign of Tobias.

His warriors are dying around him.  He doesn’t know what to do.  All the choices are wrong.  Enemies are on all sides, far too many to fight.

«Help Rachel and Marco!» Jake calls.  «I’m going for Cassie.»

Ax doesn’t question.  He leaps, clearing the heads of a dozen human-controllers, and lands next to Marco.  Together they brutalize their way forward, cutting down or shoving aside anyone that gets too close.

The battle swells and screams and roars around Ax.  It’s too much to keep track of.  He loses Jake and Cassie, still hasn’t found Tobias.  All he can do is keep swinging, keep yanking his tail back bone-sore and flinging it gore-slick into yet another hot sick piece of flesh.

He stumbles over a small protrusion in the floor.  Marco steadies him roughly.  It’s the first stair.  He struggles up the first several too-small steps, hooves sliding on the blood-slick stone.

Rachel is shrinking, half-crushed by the crowd of fleeing hosts.  She goes down.  Marco and Ax haul her upright.  They pull her forward with unforgiving speed in spite of her many injuries, trying to keep the mob from eating her whole.  Ax feels the strange sizzling non-pain of a fourth-degree dracon burn along his left hind leg.  His collapse halted by the press of the crowd, he shoves onward.

Ax bursts into the bizarre empty quiet of the high school hallway.  Marco is just ahead of him, carrying Rachel with her face hidden against his dark fur.

Half a dozen hosts are fleeing in every direction.  «Godspeed,» Marco murmurs, looking after them.  His thought-speak is shaky with unshed tears.

It’s nearly a half an hour — long enough for Ax to show Rachel how to morph to be rid of injuries — before there’s a clatter of hooves.  Cassie, still in horse morph, bursts through the doorway.  Jake is slumped across her back, clinging to her mane with the arm that isn’t severed at the elbow by a hork-bajir blade.  His right side and Cassie’s entire flank are soaked with blood.  He slides off the moment they’re safe, green-white with shock.  Ax rushes to his side to tell him to morph.

When Jake has morphed and demorphed, he slowly sits up.  He looks from where Rachel is punching a locker door repeatedly to where Marco crouches over the custodian’s sink to vomit.  Finally, he looks up at Ax.  “Where’s Tobias?” he asks, soft and hoarse.

Rachel whirls away from the locker she was abusing.  “We thought he was with you!”

They all stare at each other in silence for several more seconds.

Jake curls forward to bury his face in his hands.  “We have to go,” he says into his palms.  “If... if I don’t get home before Tom does...”

There’s another long moment of silence.  Marco becomes the first to turn and walk away.

Tobias finds Ax, later that night.  He’s not dead, anyway.  And he’s not a controller, not in that form.  Ax knows better to voice such sparse consolation.  He can’t offer hope, not really.  Instead he does his best to listen, and to let Tobias say what he will.

Their next meeting in Cassie’s barn is... tense.

“How could we let this happen?” Jake demands.  “How could we have done this?  I should have known—”

«Jake...» Tobias says.

“Anyway, I’m out.”  Marco stands up.

“Fine, then get out!” Rachel shouts.  “What are you waiting for?  Go run home to Daddy!”

“What I’m waiting for is to see if I can convince any of you people to come with me!” Marco says.  “Because, for the record, we should all be out.”  He takes a breath.  “Ax... Jake... I know you both have more of a stake in this.  But...”

“It’s your call, dude,” Jake says.

“Okay, but back to the real problem,” Rachel snaps.  “How do we fix Tobias?”

Ax takes a step back.  She didn’t look directly at him, but both Jake and Cassie did.  «I... I wish that I had more answers... Escafil’s paradox of zero-space delay...»  He has no answers.  No words.

«In short: we don’t.»  Tobias jerks his head.  «So.  Guess I’ll be hanging out with Ax a lot more in the future.»

“But even if we can’t demorph him...”  Cassie is definitely looking at Ax.  So is everyone else.  “There has to be something we can do, right?”

Ax’s tail hits the stall door behind him.  He’s been backing away from them the entire time.  His chest heaves with panic, eyes skittering from one target to another.  Except Tobias.  He can’t look at Tobias.

“Ax?” Jake says, and then, “Hey, Ax, hey.  Just, just, take a second, okay?”

“Take a second?”  Rachel crosses her arms.  “He’s the one who got us into this, and now Tobias—”

«I’m a fraud!» Ax bursts out.  He’s shaking, still gasping.  «I don’t know what I’m doing — I’m just a stupid incompetent kid.  I ran last night, like a coward, and I left Tobias to be killed.  I’m not a war prince, I’m a fake!  A stupid, useless fake!»

Tobias flutters down to land on the stall door across from him. «There’s a big difference between being inexperienced and being a liar, Ax-Man.»

«You don’t — You don’t understand.»  Ax wraps both arms around himself.  «I can’t lead, I can’t do anything right. I have less than four months of training from living on the Dome ship, and even that was only because of being Elfangor’s brother.  I never should have tried to pretend to be a war-prince, because I’m not.  I’m not even a warrior.»

“And, what, you think any of us are?” Jake asks quietly.  “We’re all dumb kids with even less training than what you have.  But we all went down there anyway.  Not because you told us to.  Because I asked for it.”

«I still had responsibility for you all,» Ax says miserably.  «And I failed you.»

“You screwed up, yeah,” Rachel says.  “So do better next time.”

“Next time?” Marco demands.  “You saw that place— You heard— Are you out of your mind?”

She rounds on him.  “You’re right.  I saw.  I heard.  There are little kids down there right now, Marco.  My cousin is down there.  And so are thousands of other people.  If you’re too much of a coward to do anything about it, that’s your problem, but I’m not letting that stop me.”

«I’m still gonna do what I can to help,» Tobias says.  «So count me in.»

“I’m in too,” Jake says.  “Ax?”

«I can’t lead you,» Ax insists.  «I can’t.  It wouldn’t be right.  It’s not my place.»

“Hate to say it, but we need a leader,” Cassie points out.  “Ax, we can’t make you do it if you don’t want to. Tobias, should you lead us?”

«What?  No!  I’m nobody’s leader.»

“Okay, okay.”  Jake looks around.  “We don’t have to decide this right now.  We’re all tired, so let’s just take a breather and meet back here tomorrow when we’re clearer headed.  Yeah?”

None of them argue.  Cassie and Marco murmur agreement.  Rachel’s already turning away, asking Tobias where he plans to stay tonight.

Interesting, Ax thinks.  The vote isn’t until tomorrow, but he suspects he knows already who they’re going to choose.

Jake is not what Ax would’ve expected from a prince.  He calls for a vote any time there’s a major decision to be made.  He always explains himself to his team, after the fact if not in the moment.  He becomes the first one to admit when he made a mistake, and sometimes even when a mess wasn’t his fault at all.  He asks Ax questions.  A lot of questions.

But he leads them.  He makes the calls in the battles.  He takes responsibility for them all, and he carries it well enough to get by.  Unless, of course, the situation calls for an official chain of command.

«Prince Elfangor asked me to lead in his stead,» Ax tells the andalite commander on the long-distance call.  «I accepted the honor, and was humbled by it.»

«Very well, Prince Aximili.» Ithileran’s expression is stiff, but he doesn’t argue.  «We would like to discuss the nature of your strategy for leading the Earth resistance.»

Throughout the conflict on Leera, Commander Galuit seems to be almost bemused by the Animorphs.  «I’ve heard a great deal about you, Prince Aximili,» he says.  «What do you suggest we do about these explosives?»

«I wouldn’t dream of making such a decision without consulting my warriors,» Ax says diplomatically.  It’s Jake’s cue to make a polite suggestion, but that Marco can also be expected to weigh in with an opinion.

«Yes,» Galuit says, as much to himself as anyone.  «You’re an interesting one, indeed.»

“You’ll have to forgive him,” Tobias says loudly to the security forces.  “He’s visiting royalty, you see.  Extremely important prince.  From a place you wouldn’t have heard of.”

Ax has consumed what is, perhaps, slightly more than a typical quantity of mini quiches at what is supposed to be an all-you-can-eat banquet.  He fails to see why this is an occasion for law enforcement.

“Anyway.”  Tobias is now shepherding Ax out of the room, which is unfair because he has only made it halfway through the platter of crab rangoon.  “It’s considered a compliment where he’s from.  And if you even think about filing a report, you will be hearing from the rest of his majesty’s security team.”

“We will not be falling in line,” Jake tells Arbat, chin lifted, eyes narrow.  “We will not be deferring to your command.  We will do what Prince Aximili tells us, and I suggest you do the same.  Because you can either help us, or you can get out of our way.”

Standing on the bridge of the Blade ship, hand resting on the pad that broadcasts footage of the Animorphs to the entire Andalite Electorate, Ax does his best to look confident.  «We have won a great victory this day, but now is the time for peace.  Now is the time to work with the humans to help them rebuild.  Now is the time for forgiveness, for yeerks and taxxons alike.»

«Who are you?» the Technical Officer demands.

Marco opens his mouth to make a smart comment, but refrains.

«I am War-Prince Aximili-Esgarrouth-Isthill,» Ax says.  «And as of this moment, I am officially ceding my position to Prince Jake Berenson, Commander in Chief of the Earth Resistance.»

Jake steps forward.  Grieved but unbowed.  Nervous but resolute.  All eyes are on him.

So no one notices when Alloran nudges Ax gently in the side.  When he says in private thought-speak, «I can say with utter certainty that he would have been proud of you.»

[notthefilmreview]

Lauren James’ The Next Together was *way* better than THE LONLIEST GIRL IN THE UNIVERSE (sorry!)

Hey, it’s Dana and it’s Monday which means a new blog post (yay!)

Today I’m going to be reviewing a book I read about a month or two ago called The Lonliest Girl In The Universe by Lauren James. 

If you’ve heard the name Lauren James before then it’s probably because you might have read her book The Next Together. I may do another post about this book (despite reading it such a long time ago) but to spoil my overall view: I absolutely adore that book. The Next Together is basically the zenith of young adult novels so it’s clear why I came into The Lonliest Girl In The Universe with high hopes.

From the cover itself you can clearly see how just about anyone would want to pick up this book and read it. I, myself, ended up staying up until midnight (on a school night, might I add) attempting to finish the book because I just needed to know what happened or else it would have seriously haunted me the next day. Therefore, from that you can probably tell that I did enjoy my read.

However, don’t be mad but...I wasn’t entirely pleased. The problem was that I really started reading this book with such *high* hopes that it would equal (or even surpass) the incredibly thought out and heart warming story of The Next Together’s Matthew and Katherine (I love Matthew and Katherine so much, there is no other perfect love story). But, at the end of the day, it just didn’t suffice.

To explain why I think this way, let’s start out from the beginning with our main character Romy Silvers. In a very positive note, Romy’s character has real depth and that is quite clearly explored throughout most of the book (compared to the slightly under developed ‘romance’ plot) which, I guess if you know the ending, is quite intentional. The plot of being the daughter of astronauts who died in space and essentially being ‘the last man standing’ is very enticing for avid sci-fi readers. 

(On a side note, I have noticed that Lauren James does like incorporating science into her work from what I’ve seen of The Next Together and this book and it does seem as though she has thoroughly done some background research before writing. So I do applaud that because it does make the novel even more realistic and exciting.)

I also believe that Lauren James doesn’t shy away from focusing the story on Romy’s psychological feelings after experiencing the deaths of the astronauts and then the death of her father at the hands of her mother and I absolutely loved that!

Romy’s relationship with her father seemed realistic and adorable (and I also liked how her father was British). Romy’s relationship with her mother on the other hand is where you get to the tension that makes you ask question after question, urging you to turn and turn the page until you’ve finally reached the end of the novel at three in the morning.

Romy’s mother is one of those characters you really want to have a spin-off series on because she just seems so interesting. Therefore, if Lauren James were to decide to make a spin-off based around Romy’s mother then I would like to know about her life on the way to becoming an astronaut (going to school, training, meeting her husband, her relationships with the other astronauts - particularly Lucy and Jeremy, J’s parents) up until the astronauts died, where the real psychological effects of their deaths could be explored.

At the end, she does end up redeeming herself of killing her husband by dying in the process of trying to stop J from killing Romy. There was something about that ending that didn’t seem very fulfilling because I just wanted to see more of Romy and her mother attempting to work together to defeat J, with her possibly dying in the process to pay her penance. The ending overall did seem quite rushed and underwhelming.

Now, let’s talk about the ‘romance’ aspect of the novel. So, the reason as to why I put ‘romance’ in inverted commas is because it just wasn’t exactly the romance driven plot we as the reader were advertised in the blurb. While, yes, that was most likely intentional as the story did mislead the reader into believing J was actually who he said he was - the story seemed to focus more on Romy’s past, her fears, and the burden NASA has set on her shoulders.

While J’s part of the story was essential for the plot, I don’t think it should have been a romantic arc (especially because ends up being some 30 or 40 something guy, which really did make me *INCREDIBLY* uncomfortable). Instead, I think Romy should have just seen him as a good friend and confident in the lonely space because even if J didn’t end up being a paedo, their romance was under developed and made me feel quite uncomfortable at times (but so does every YA romance so maybe it’s just the style...)

So, the twist was obviously that J was a 30 something guy who catfished a 16 or 17 year old girl because he wanted to seek revenge for the deaths of his parents. The fact that his parents were part of the astronauts who died was a compelling part of his character and I don’t knock off any points for that backstory. However, what still aggravates me is of course the romance.

(Get ready for a rant).

Okay, so even before she knew of J’s real age (and hair colour because he ended up being blonde instead of brunette after all and I don’t know why but I’m really annoyed about that) the romance did seem a tad bit...iffy. Firstly, he did tell her that he was in his 20s while she was about 15 or 16 so she is still very much underage - and that made me *deeply* uncomfortable. This is especially because their overall longing was to link up their ships (I don’t really know if that might be an innuendo or English Lit has just made me see everything in a sexual way????) and then live together - alone - in deep space, with zero adult supervision (or any other human supervision at all for that matter!) 

Basically, even if he didn’t have that ulterior motive their relationship would have been creepy and I would have been deeply scared for Romy’s safety.

The last thing I want to talk about before the ending (and I saved this for last because it is both the most laughable and annoying aspect of the novel) was Romy’s fanfiction. Just the very fact that there is fanfiction (and that it is even essential to the plot) is quite amusing too me but in such a cringey way. Not to be rude or anything to fanfiction writers (because I do believe that everyone has at least read one piece of fanfiction in their life and there are many brilliant writers out there) but I just don’t believe that fanfiction belongs in novels. I feel as though once an author decides to add fanfiction to novels I end up mentally (or physically) rolling my eyes and the novel almost degrades before my eyes. 

There’s a line between incorporating things like letters or emails (which is very much used in the novel as well) and then incorporating something like fanfiction; I feel as though this books crossed this line. I don’t really know how to lightly describe how much is displeases me to use fanfiction (or even the mere word ‘fanfiction’) in novels but I just think it makes the novel seem almost Wattpad-esque. There is the argument that many YA books do feel like a Wattpad book (and some are even Wattpad books *cough* *cough* After *cough* *cough*) but, again, there is a line and this book crossed this line in so many ways.

In addition, there’s also something else that I have noticed in this novel and other novels as well. It’s this recurring theme of the main character being really avidly into reading or writing (or both!). This is most likely because it does bring in the aspect of the nerdy girl in romances and the very fact that authors write about what they love  - and what do they love? Reading of course! I just thought I’d point that out because I don’t really know if anyone else has ever noticed this (or if I’m just reading too far into things).

Alright, so overall the book was a lovely light read if you’re really into young adult science fiction-esque literature as long as you can handle the cringe (and if you often read YA novels then you probably can) and can stomach the age difference (so maybe the book’s for Twilight readers).

If anyone has any book recommendations for me (because that’s just what I need, I guess; more books to add to my reading list!) then comment down below books that you just adore and I might read it!

Also, if anyone’s read The Lonliest Girl In The Universe then tell me what you thought of it!

Anyway, I’ll be back again at the end of this week so follow my blog if you want to see that! Byeeeeeeee!!!!

[zenosanalytic]

Reply-Reply to Shonasof: Discovering Klingons

shonasof replied to your post: DS9: Political Writings III: Worf

It’s still a HELL of a lot more interesting that what Discovery is doing to the Klingons.    

Who knows what this is in response to given how comments work these days, but I really don’t see Discovery as contrary to what I was arguing. Rather, I see it as “getting it” in a way 90s Trek never really managed to(TOS can be excused since those were totally different Klingons who were more expys of Earthican colonialist powers or, occasionally, the USSR than a weird, vaguely defined, imperial space-feudalism). Discovery runs with the 90s Trek concept of “Houses” and the implications of it, which is basically what I’m also doing. This is Long :| :| :|

In ep 2 of Discovery we see heads of 7 Great Houses respond to T’Kuvma’s summon to face a threat to “The Empire”. But the thing is, there is no real “Empire” to speak of. An “Empire” is a polity with a unitary leadership or rule, and the Klingons lack a central government. Rather, the Klingon “Empire” is a corporate(meaning made of smaller autonomous bits, not “a business”) entity made up of a few large Corporate governments, the Great Houses, plus hundreds or thousands of smaller corporate governments(the not-Great Houses) of varying size and importance contained within or allied with those Great Houses, all fighting one another over that “Empire”, as a territory, in pursuit of their own interests. That’s was a “Feudal” society is. If one could unite all the Houses behind them, then it would become an Empire in the functional sense, and that’s obviously what Kol is attempting to do.

T’Kuvma also tries to unite the Houses into a true Empire again, but his attempt is not a self-aggrandizing one that exploits the feudal logic of the House system to make himself overlord(as Kol’s does with his passing out of cloaking technology to proven loyalists, and poaching of feudatories), but rather one that seeks to route around its tendency towards internal conflict through an appeal to shared cultural values and a shared external enemy(sort of like The Church and The Crusades). Which makes sense, considering that their “First Contact” was the Hur’q conquering and plundering Qo’noS, then hightailing it with troves of Klingon artifacts and natural resources(an Era possibly reminiscent of 70s Heavy Metal apocalyptic sci-fi-fantasy album-covers. We just Can’t Know u_u). That experience would tend to make a culture pretty hostile to and suspicious of outsiders, and rallying insiders around attacking outsiders a significant cultural trope. Casting the Fed -an ideologically anti-militaristic alliance of prosperous, loot-rich worlds- as that enemy is particularly effective as it also appeals to the more mercenary aspects of Fedual systems. “Feudal Obligation” as a concept can be boiled down, 7 times out of 10, to the promise “If you kill and rob people who I tell you to, I’ll give you a cut of their stuff”. This leads to what you might call “plunder economies”: a person becomes a lord by promising, and successfully delivering, wealth to others(being a “ring-giver”, in the explicit parlance of Beowulf) then must continuing delivering wealth to maintain that loyalty, necessitating more raiding, plundering and -whenever land and the people to work it become vital or commercial resources- eventually conquest. Plunder economies are, as a structural matter and by definition, expansionary, internecine, and aggressive; looting outsiders when a strong center is present to prevent internal conflict, and looting each other(along with everyone else) when one isn’t.

Discovery takes this feudal dynamic seriously and explores it. For instance, this is why Kol could so easily gain the loyalty of Voq’s followers. Voq couldn’t defend T’Kuvma, couldn’t even feed his followers, let alone give them plunder and wealth, and Kol could. By the terms of political morality a feudal society like that of the Klingons operated under, Voq failed T’Kuvma as a follower by not keeping him alive, and failed his surviving followers as a lord by not providing even the basics of food, drink, and a safe place to sleep. Kol could and did, so they switched to following him instead. There’d have been little or any internal moral sanction on their parts about this; it wasn’t a betrayal to them he deserved to be abandoned. Kol’s snide comment to Voq on his return about his followers switching their loyalty for such paltry food isn’t an insult to them for the ease with which they were won; it’s an insult to Voq for his inability to provide as a Lord should.

What’s particularly cool here to me, though, is that Discovery doesn’t treat the Klingons as a flat culture with just a single moral philosophy; T’Kuvma’s House existed within the Klingon system, but it was built around loyalty to a political, spiritual, and moral philosophy which sought to transcend the feudal House system and its worldview through the cult of Kahless and the more egalitarian ideals of his myth. Thus Voq’s refusal to scavenge from the Fed ships. Scavenging is the obvious choice by the Klingon political/warrior morality of the Houses -if you’re strong enough to take something you should- but an impossible one by the equally Klingon spiritual/ethical morality which T’Kuvma preached, and which Voq favors. So, too, Voq’s inability to see Kol’s approaching and obvious betrayal; Voq and Kol are operating in two Klingon -but different- moral universes, and what appears “impossible” and “inconceivable” to do and remain Honorable to Voq appears obvious, necessary, justified, Victorious(and thus Honorable) to Kol. This is a sort of cultural complexity 90s Trek rarely allowed, and even more rarely explored, in non-Fed, non-Human cultures. Ironically, Worf seems, in retrospect, more like a T’Kuvmaite than most Klingons(minus the extreme Klingon Chauvinism) -emphasizing the universal aspects of Khaless’s life and teachings, and a personal ethic of Honor inspired by his example, rather than the practical Warrior’s life most Klingons we see prefer- and for that he’s called “Unklingon” throughout the 90s Trek Era.

So how does this relate to the House of Mogh? In 90s Trek what we see is an Empire in the sense that a central government’s pronouncements are generally recognized throughout a set territory, but structurally it is an Aristocratic, Feudal Democracy: A High Council of the Great Houses rules the Empire, led by a Chancellor elected by the council from among its members. That, during the Civil War, Kurn brought ships to Gowron’s cause, and could just as easily take them away again, shows that the Houses(and, very likely, Houseless captains who have proven themselves able providers to their followers) provide the ships and soldiers which defend the Empire, rather than being granted ships from a central Imperial Fleet. That Grelka’s House was put under direct economic strain by the Cardassian War suggests that Houses not only provide the ships and soldiers but maintain and supply them(none of the fighting happened in Klingon territory, so the strain only could have come from war costs), rather than having them supplied through a centralized military bureaucracy[1]. When the House of Duras rebels against the rightfully elected Chancellor Gowron, the majority of Klingon ships and troops follow them into rebellion, showing that Feudal obligation and connection carries greater importance in Klingon politics and society than loyalty to the central “Empire”[2].

Obvsl, the writing in the shows is simply convenient to whatever story the writers and showrunners want to tell. Luckily we, as fans, have the luxury of getting to pretend it’s supposed to have internal consistency, and try to imagine it into a form we like that does(which is to say: we get to make it convenient to our own storytelling) >:] So, assuming that Klingon concepts of Honor and morality are just as Feudal as the evidence suggests for their political structure, I figured that Worf’s second Discommendation wouldn’t be as clear-cut as DS9 presents it. Gowron is feudal lord to both Worf and Kurn. Worf, as an individual, refuses to join the invasion on the basis of his Duty to the Federation. He took an Oath to the Federation, Feudal relations are based on Oaths, forsaking an Oath would dishonor him, so he refuses to, and people living in a Feudal system would Get that. Kurn, living within the Empire and bearing no complicating Obligation to the Federation, joins the war-effort and takes his House into the war. Gowron, to punish Worf for his choice, discommendates the whole House. Discommendating Worf alone he could probably get away with(there are other cultural reasons I think that ought to be difficult, but this is all hc anyway so whatever), but doing so to Kurn, a member of the High Council and life-long warrior with friends throughout the Fleet, and the whole House of Mogh, one of the richer and more important in the Empire since the Civil War, would violate his Obligation as Lord to them as Feudatories, and without either having even come close to violating their Obligations to him.

Such punishments aren’t unheard of in Feudal systems, but usually they exist in more centralized ones where military power is concentrated around the Executive, whatever they’re called,  making it easier to destroy Houses that have fallen out of favor. When the military is directly controlled by and loyal to the Nobility, and only loaned to the Central government, that makes forcibly dissolving their Houses much more difficult(and usually impossible unless they’re widely hated or very small). In the more distributed and corporate Aristocratic state that the Klingons have, it’d have not only generated ill-will(because if he can do it to them, two of his oldest allies and the House that saved him in the Civil War, then he can do it to Anybody), it’d have been seen as foolish(and it’d be questionable that the House of Mogh would just accept it lying down to begin with). The thing about overlords is that very few people are usually personally loyal and obligated to them. Rather, people are loyal and obligated to them second-hand, through the upper-nobility who choose to follow them. So the majority of Gowron’s powerbase would be in his support among the Great Houses; not necessarily in his own House, and certainly not in his office. Impoverishing, dishonoring, and exiling form the Empire a House(and its feudatories) that was such a significant part of his powerbase, naturally shaming their allies and infuriating their admirers in the bargain, would have looked, politically, like him cutting off his own foot and sticking the stump in an anthill. Even those Houses with grudges against the House of Mogh(for instance, Duras loyalists) would have thought less of Gowron for weakening himself so massively and unnecessarily over the decision of one man, who is a pretty unconventional Klingon living within the Federation anyway.

Like: Imagine what would happen politically in the US if Bernie Sanders were declared a traitor, had all his property seized, and was exiled from the US for opposing a war with Iran. Then imagine how that would go down if he trained, equipped, and led a sizeable portion of the US Army(many of whom grew up under Bernie’s political and social patronage), owned large stakes in many US firms, and personally managed numerous US cities. Now imagine a Democratic President doing that and what it’d do to the Party’s voter base. That’s the sort of situation Gowron is creating for himself by discommendating Kurn and Worf, and DS9 treats it like it’s nothing because things are easier that way. As someone with an Inveterate interest in politics, I think that’s boring.

And Gowron’s power rests on him being seen as smart and savvy. A consistent part of his characterization since his first ep in TNG has been that he’s a political animal and outsider, not really accepted by the Great Houses, and too much of a plotter and deal-maker, too indirect and ambiguous, for the liking of the Klingon aristocracy. So starting a war by weakening his internal position, alienating his friends, and making himself appear foolish before his enemies, in a society where promotion in most walks of life is handled by killing the person ahead of you for their incompetence, would be a very Bad Look for him.

[1]It’s possible these were exactions which then went to such a central bureaucracy, but that would still mean the central government cannot extract resources directly, but instead must extract them through the Houses, meaning the Klingon economy would still be, structurally, Feudal in character.

[2]and possibly that “The Empire” and the central government aren’t considered synonymous in Klingon culture. Given the mythic quality of Kahless, how inseparable he is from “The Empire”, and the way “loyal to the Emperor” is used even when no Emperor exists, making it more of a saying seeming to mean “a good Klingon”, this could very well be the case. “The Empire” could just be a sort of nebulous geonational concept: basically “Klingon Space”. Sort of like “Christendom”.

[taeguboi]

BTS x GOT7 Ship Pairings HCs

Request: ‘ bts with got7 members? like pairs in friendship and as a ship’

Part 2 of BTS x GOT7 request

PREVIOUS POST: BTS x GOT7 Friendship Pairings

Headcanons Masterlist

GOTBANG (BOY)FRIEND-SHIPS

Rap Monster + Jackson: RapSon 랩슨

The RapSon cannot be unseen

Though their relationship is love/hate

more love from Jackson’s side let’s be honest

Rap Mon is soft for Jackson

Too intelligent for y’all

Lots of sass with each other

well actually

it’s mostly Jackson jumping round being precious

followed by Rap Mon being

r00d

but they equally make fun of the shit each of them does on stage

“well Rap Monster is like this”

“but Jackson is like this”

uh Namjoon

your phone is ringing

you should, you know

probably answer that

“nahhh”

because he wants to seem chill and manly

Jackson may be older

but Rap Mon is the hyung, really

Mothers’ blessings needed

and of course, they instantly give their blessings

Jin + JB: JaeJin 재진

Not to be confused w/ JinJae

Confidence

Visual couple

Both like to take photos

But there’s no prettier picture than his boyfriend

JB is always writing in his notebook

Jin inspires him

makes songs just for Jin’s voice

not just ballads or whatever bullshit we get fed as to why Jin doesn’t get enough f*ckin’ lines most of the time

Fancy restaurant dates

midnight snacks

2 single parents unite

bc Jackson is enough for Joon to look after so bye

Youngjae gets special treatment tho

BROAD SHOULDERS

BIG MOUTHFULS OF FOOD

acting

will act sensitive to get what they want

like ‘I’m so offended’

just so they get the last of everything

cover is bust when they’re giggling in their room

because omg they fell for it yet again

sass

but never on the level of the Suga/Jinyoung pairing

seriously has no one giffed the jin/jb back hug thing that time at the isac? dammit

well, insert that here, in your mind before the next gif

Suga + Jinyoung: SugaJin 슈가진 / YoonYoung 윤영

SAVAGE to everyone

Act so cold in public

but behind closed doors, they’re so squishy

*knock on the door*

*quick, act manly*

*we totally weren’t spooning,*

*or feeding each other food,*

*no homo*

*you should leave”

*so Jinyoung can read Yoongi a bedtime story*

back up parents

Ninjas

you don’t always notice they’ve entered the room

til you turn round and

GODDAMMIT HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN LOOKING OVER MY SHOULDER?!

*shrugs*

chill

yet have no chill

J-Hope + Youngjae: YoungHope 영홉 / HopeJae 홉재

SUNSHINE SHIP

Pure

You can just walk up to them from behind

and they both scream

bless

Always clinging onto each other

Gentle souls

“boys, what are you doing?”

“V-hyung thought he saw a ghost so we’re hugging to increase our energy field against it”

or something along the lines of idk about conspiracy and superstition tbh

Youngjae playing piano for J-Hope to dance to

J-Hope giving Youngjae the energy to wake up in the mornings

Taking Coco on long walks together

Sorry Mark, you’re gonna have to share her with one more person

Coco adores Hobi

That’s sign enough for Youngjae that he’s the one

and he drags J-Hope into the whole

I AM OUT thing

Jimin + BamBam: BamMin 뱀민

No one really expected this

There was just something about BamBam

That flustered Jimin

and Jimin’s mood eventually was just like that moment when he was like

“JEON JEONGGUK!!!” on the rooftop

only with BamBam’s name obviously

Like last year, when Jimin saw BamBam, he was a cute bubby

But then he just entered the room one day and it was like

h O L y  s H i t  h E  g R e W  UP

Although they’re in the maknae lines of their respective groups

They treat each other as one another wants to be treated

so they treat each other like the men they are

Offensive dancing couple

too many thrusts and rolls for any sane person to handle

That couple that make everyone late

“just five more minutes!”

“you said that 2 hours ago!”

selcas galore

that one in particular of their matching ear piercings becomes iconic

P L U M P  L I P S

matching clothes

dye their hair specifically to become the most aesthetically pleasing couple ever

V + Mark: VMark 뷔맠 / TaeMark 태맠

Adorable

Mark sometimes helps V with his English

but gets distracted by the proudness

and then he just has to stop for cuddles

V loves cuddling his older boyfriend

V is always the big spoon

because he always has to hug something in his sleep

sometimes he’ll even act sleepy just so he can keep hugging Mark

Skateboarding dates

lots of dates actually

just nipping down to the shop together

turns into sitting on a park bench together enjoying life

everything becomes a date

Mark, you have to stop jumping off of things in front of this kid tho

because he wants to try that shit for himself like

NO TAE!!!

but Mark does have a calming effect on V

Mark makes sure to look after V well

easily distracted

“Uh, guys, didn’t you have something cooking on the stove?”

*smoke alarm sets off*

oops

Actual puppies

Jungkook + Yugyeom: JungGyeom 정겸 / YuGuk 유국

This maknae ship can’t be unseen either

Jungkook didn’t think he’d want to date someone taller or younger

Until Yugyeom

Yugyeom can be quite mature for his age

Smiles all round

Growing up too fast

everyone one day is just sat there minding their own business having their separate conversations

and then Yugyeom just blurts this innuendo out to Jungkook

and the whole dinner table is SHOOK

Jin has to hold back that one tear he’s about to shed

but then Jinyoung says something savage to Yugyeom

everyone laughs and carries on and ‘forgets’

but they don’t forget

that will always be the day that innocence went extinct

bowling dates

Yugyeom likes long hugs in public

Jungkook gets flustered and embarrassed

getting teased by the other 97 liners they’re in a chat with

bless these children

I did my best on this hc, hope this was almost as much fun to read as it was to think about all the got-bang interactions haha... 

It got a bit tricky along the way because I only wanted to do each got7 member once for friendship and once for a ship so it was all equal... if not it would have been Youngjae dating like 4 people and JB at least 2 and it’d be one weird love triangle only with a shape with more sides [when did I stop being smart]

[yukipri]

YOI Future!Verse ABO AU - Timeline + Basics

*second image slightly larger in full view

So for this AU, the comics are kinda all over the place in terms of timeline, and the timeline itself isn’t particularly rigid in my mind either ^ ^; There’s some complicated world-building and a lot of stuff that I don’t really mention but is just part of the overall AU in my mind. So here’s a reference for not just you but me that should help give context for the comics that are out and also give you a hint as to the kinds of scenarios you can expect within this AU in the future.

WARNINGS PLEASE HEED:

-A/B/O (yes that’s alpha/beta/omega dynamics aka omegaverse) with unnecessarily complicated world-building, mpreg, and OC children.

-Yuuri-centric poly marriage, the main ship(s) are Victor x Yuuri, Yurio x Yuuri, Phichit x Yuuri, Minami x Yuuri, all simultaneous, with additional  Chris x Yuuri and Otabek x Yuuri later in the timeline. Relationships among other members of the family are more or less platonic. (If this isn’t your thing, no need to comment, PLEASE SKIP by hitting the J key)

-The relationship is completely requited and consensual among all parties. This AU does not contain any adultery, endgame unrequited, or past and done with relationships among the main family members.

-No underage romantic/sexual relationships but some characters have crushes while they are underage that are not acted upon.

-Don’t take anything too seriously this is legit my “I don’t want to think, just lemme self-indulge and please roll with it” AU >.>;;

-all subject to change on my whims

~~

This INTRO POST covers some of the basics of how ABO works in this AU, and the following text assumes you’ve read it.

Here’s an even more detailed world-building post

For links to the other comics in this AU, check out the “Future!verse ABO” section of my YOI Art Masterpost HERE!

~~

Please keep ship bashing out of the comments/tags. Don’t like, just skip <3 Thank you.

~~

PLEASE DO NOT REPOST, EDIT, OR OTHERWISE USE MY ART WITHOUT MY EXPLICIT PERMISSION. More detailed rules available on my Rules & FAQ Post.

~~

Okay with all the warnings? LONG text post beneath cut!

Timeline [titles of works in this AU in brackets]:

-5 years pre-canon, Yuuri moves to Detroit.

-4 years pre-canon, Phichit comes to Detroit and becomes Yuuri’s roommate. He presents as alpha around half a year after they meet.

-more or less ��canon” YOI

-year following canon - Yurio presents as alpha (and ends up suffering in skating as a result), Vic sweeps gold at all competitions [Yurio presenting comic #1]

-2nd year following canon - Yurio wins gold at Worlds, Yuuri wins gold at the GPF, Vic takes silver at both. (when are the Olympics? who knows!)

-2 years after canon - Yuuri and Victor officially take over coaching Yurio from Yakov, and the three of them also start formally dating.

-3 years after canon - Yuuri and Victor retire, they and Yurio get 3-way married, Yuuri’s pregnant with twins and takes a 3 year leave from full time work (tho he occasionally swaps coaching with Victor) and temporarily relocates back to Hasetsu.

-6 years after canon - kids are 2+, Yuuri returns to full time work, Minami asks Yuuri to be his coach and Yuuri decides to do that instead of returning to co-coaching Yurio with Vic [preview comic + Coach or No? comic + half a year later, Minami’s devotion comic]

-7 years after canon - kids are 3+, Yuuri’s still coaching Minami, and there’s rumors that Yuuri’s pregnant again but this time with Phichit’s kid. Yuuri marries Phichit before the end of the year. [Intro comic (latter part)]

-10 years after canon - Minami also marries Yuuri, and Yuuri gets pregnant with his fourth child.

[EDIT: Chris and Otabek also join after this, details to come]

[note: future comics will be scattered anywhere along this timeline I see fit]

~~

~~

Points to note about this AU:

-In this universe, many countries allow omegas (and oftentimes ONLY omegas) to have multiple spouses because omegas are more likely to give birth to alphas, which many countries want more of. There’s a lot of stigma against poly marriages but it’s legal if an omega is involved. (mentioned in intro post)

-The country our family lives in will be irrelevant/ambiguous in most of my comics, but you can assume they have several houses and occasionally move between them. During his three year hiatus Yuuri stays mostly in Hasetsu bc he wanted to raise them in a quieter, more low-profile location and wanted the support of his family (plus his family home is an onsen. Marvelous for aching). Vic + Yurio + Minami once he becomes Yuuri’s student all home rink wherever the family’s main location happens to be at the time.

-Victor is the catalyst for a lot of things in their relationship, including first proposing invoking the right of an omega to have multiple mates to get poly married. He cares the least about following traditional social expectations and has the confidence to proactively encourage the others to embrace the strange and unconventional if that’s what happens to work for them. While extremely jealous of outsiders, he is self-proclaimed “extremely greedy” and is set on creating the happiest future he can for what started as just Yuuri, but ends up being the entire growing group of people he considers his family.

-Yuuri and Phichit have been in a steady, ambiguous but definitely not purely platonic relationship since pre-canon. Yuuri helped Phichit through his presentation as alpha, and Phichit helped Yuuri through all his heats in Detroit. The Russians are fully aware of their bond and all parties consent to this relationship, though at first Vic and Yurio aren’t entirely sure what to make of it and why Phichit hasn’t pushed for more. Phichit’s not in any rush to officiate his relationship with Yuuri because he’s not planning on going anywhere. Plus, he doesn’t want to make things any more hectic than they already are after Yuuri marries the Russians. Phichit gets closer to the Russians during the 7 years post canon, at which time everyone feels that it’s time for him and Yuuri to also get married.

-Yurio had an ambiguous but growing crush on Yuuri since pre-canon but he’s in strict denial about it even though it’s becoming painfully and almost comically obvious to everyone except him and Yuuri. Things come to a head after he presents and Victor is helping him learn about his new status as an alpha and ends up outing Yurio’s feelings in the process. Yurio expects Victor to flat out crush his chances with Yuuri and is surprised when Victor is oddly encouraging, though it’s a mystery as to why. During their time at St. Petersburg, Yurio feels anxious that Victor and Yuuri’s retirement is getting closer and demands they stay with him as coaches and ends up accidentally confessing at the same time, sparking their three-way relationship which he realizes was Victor’s goal all along.

-Yuuri was worried about marrying Yurio while he was so young but Yurio wanted to get married early because he knew he’d regret it forever if his grandfather was unable to make the wedding. Yurio’s super worried about his grandfather bc Yurio’s always away, his grandfather lives alone in a pretty isolated area and his health isn’t great. After Yurio gets married, Kolya visits Hasetsu and hits it off with Yuuri’s parents, and after that it doesn’t take long to convince him to move in with them which certainly puts Yurio’s mind at ease. Kolya loves helping with the kids and is very happy to be their caretaker when their parents have to inevitably travel away from home.

-Phichit retired relatively early from professional figure skating to pursue his dream of creating his own ice show, which means learning not just the skating part but production design, acting, and everything else. His primary passion is entertaining his audience after all. During one of his theater internships he gets scouted as an actor, thinks it could be a good learning experience, and that lead to others gigs, leading to him becoming a pretty popular growing celebrity. This, combined with his super popular blog he runs about Yuuri’s kids (aided by his “employees,” the Nishigori triplets), has made him pretty high profile even outside the skating community.

-Minami is very openly and unashamedly in love with Yuuri but never pushes for a romantic relationship, being genuinely content and happy with whatever he can get (not that he doesn’t gloat around the Russians when he does get attention). Minami more or less moves into Yuuri’s house when he has kids and is absolutely besotted with them, self-appointing himself as Yuuri’s assistant and taking care of them constantly to the point where Yuuri has to scold him to focus on figure skating. He then also moves in with Yuuri when he gets a separate house from his parents with his current husbands and is sort of a permanent fixture in their family. The Russians bemoan how sometimes it seems the kids like Minami more than them. It seems natural and inevitable to everyone but Minami that he’d also eventually marry Yuuri, but Minami is so shocked when Yuuri proposes that he cries. (Minami’s is the only case where Yuuri proposes; in all previous marriages, his mates proposed to Yuuri)

-While he’s “currently” not really interested in permanently settling down with them, Chris pops by a lot and everyone’s used to him pretty much joining in on whatever he feels like; he’s very much an open lover, his casual relationship with Victor long preceding canon.

-Their other regular family member is Otabek, who isn’t nearly as sexually open but adores spending time with the kids. Yurio suspects Otabek may have a very slowly growing romantic interest in Yuuri and is wondering if he should discuss the possibility of him joining, but the timing doesn’t seem right so they’re content as is for now.

-For now none of them have changed their last names, as they aren’t sure how to hyphenate so many names. When his mates suggested they all take Katsuki, Yuuri wasn’t too thrilled because he’s very fond of their last names. They figure they can always change later if they want.

-They all wear their wedding bands on their left ring fingers. While his mates have more or less standard rings, Yuuri wears very thin bands so he can have them all on simultaneously, each a different color to match his mates’. Victor’s ring is white gold, Yurio’s yellow gold, Phichit’s black gold, and Minami’s is rose gold. Yuuri and Victor still wear their gold bands on their right hands as it symbolizes their unique bond during their time as coach and student. Shortly before his last competition, Minami gets a matching piercing with Yuuri, and in retaliation Yurio and Victor eventually get matching tiny tattoos on the inside of their fingers.

-The kids all call Victor, Yurio, and Phichit some variation of “dad” regardless of biological father and Yuuri some variation of “mom.” To the older three kids, Minami is their beloved “Ken-chan” because they knew him prior to him formally becoming Yuuri’s mate, but the youngest also calls him “dad.” Neither the kids nor fathers show any particular favoritism through blood connection and the kids get especially upset when outsiders try to single them out based on parentage.

~~

~~

Character presentations:

As mentioned in the Intro post, things are a bit more complicated and on a spectrum rather than cleanly divided three A/B/O categories. But the charas in this AU present as follows:

Yuuri - Omega, but leaning heavily towards the beta center of the spectrum. By U.S./international standards he’s technically classified as beta despite being able to bear children. Is not particularly sensitive to alpha pheromones and his own scent tends to be hard to notice. Usually has incredibly mild heats with main symptoms being pre-heat hunger and drowsiness. Went through most of his early life being told that he’s a very “unsexy/boring omega,” which tbh he’s been totally cool with, and he’s used to passing as a beta.

His “nonexistent omega pheromones” turns out to be a bit of a lie; he smells unbearably good to people he opens up to, but ONLY after he unintentionally lets them see who he is, so to strangers he smells beta. Yuuri is bad at opening up to people so has been under this misunderstanding for most of his life. Things change quite a bit after Victor becomes Yuuri’s coach, and Yuuri unintentionally learns how to open up his pheromones during performance and even more in his personal life.

This results in everyone who sees Yuuri perform being able to scent Yuuri’s pheromones, and for the first time in his life Yuuri gets noticed by strangers. Unused to the attention and still convinced that everything’s a misunderstanding and he has no scent, Yuuri always severely underestimates the impact of his pheromones on others which has his mates/future mates going into overdrive with protectiveness. Yuuri’s heats also become more severe based on the amount of alpha pheromones present in his vicinity.

Phichit - Alpha. Presented at sixteen while he was rooming with Yuuri. While smack dab in the center of the alpha range, he is extremely good at suppressing his pheromones due to his culture, his body’s natural biology, but most importantly extreme discipline and practice. As such he tends/chooses to pass as beta in his daily life, which allows him to remain close to Yuuri without anyone asking questions. His regular milder scent means people tend to underestimate him, but when provoked he can remove all restraints and intimidate the crap outa people with scent alone. Yuuri has always smelled amazing to him, and he didn’t know why no one else seemed to notice until Victor’s teaching revealed how Yuuri’s unique scent works.

Victor - Alpha. Very much on the far extreme end of the spectrum. Both due to his culture and how his body is, he tends to leak pheromones everywhere all the time and is very, very noticeable. Yet despite his often overwhelming presence, he is very good at keeping his emotions from coloring his pheromones and remains hard to read. He admittedly did not notice Yuuri’s scent at all until the banquet, and even then it was faint, leading to him assume that Yuuri’s a beta. During their time together he starts thinking Yuuri’s scent is getting stronger which confuses him greatly for a long time until he talks to Phichit and realizes what’s happening. While he’s glad he’s helped Yuuri access his full performance potential, he has mixed feelings about now having to beat off droves of suitors attracted by Yuuri’s scent after seeing him perform.

Yurio - Alpha. Presented at sixteen, and has very similar body chemistry to Victor. Being on the extreme end of the spectrum means more extreme sensitivity to pheromones and more extreme physical changes. More than his growth spurt, the near painful new awareness of pheromones becomes a huge barrier to his skating until he gets used to it, rendering him incapable of being in crowds of people or even stepping outside at first. During this time, the only scent he can stand and actually finds immensely comforting is Yuuri’s. Yuuri assumes it’s because his mild, unoffensive, and “unsexy” scent is soothing to Yurio’s new haywire alpha instincts, since even the scents of other omegas has Yurio feeling nauseous and sprinting to the bathroom. Victor pieces together that Yurio may be scenting Yuuri the way he is because of pre-existing emotional connections and romantic interest. Unlike Victor, Yurio’s emotions tend to bleed out heavily into his pheromones, though he does get a bit better at controlling himself with time.

Minami - Gamma (gamma-alpha). As a gamma, Minami is usually more or less beta, but changes in the pheromones in his environment/his own emotions/mental state can drastically change his pheromone output, how sensitive he is to those pheromones, and even physical factors like stamina. Unlike Phichit, he can’t really control how people perceive his pheromones. His gamma secondary is both helpful and challenging for his skating, because it means he can get a major power up whenever he’s in serious performance mode but it’s near impossible to recreate in daily practice. In addition, it’s risky to depend on “going alpha” because there’s no guarantee his emotions and environment will allow him to shift secondaries at the time and there are also benefits to performing as a beta. Training with Yuuri has helped stabilize him a ton, as being constantly bathed in the pheromones of the omega he loves has kept him in better touch with his alpha side. He tends to be full alpha the whole time whenever Yuuri is in heat.

(others, briefly)

Chris - Alpha

Otabek - Alpha

Leo - Beta

Guang-Hong - Omega

Georgi - Beta

Mila - Alpha

Seung-Gil - Alpha

JJ - Delta

Emil - Beta

Mickey - Gamma (gamma-omega)

Sara - Gamma (gamma-alpha)

Yakov - Beta

Lilia - Alpha

Minako - Alpha

Yuuko - Omega

Nishigori - Beta

Mari - Alpha

Yuuri’s parents - both beta

NOTE: International/most professional sports and other gender-divided things in this AU are NOT divided into “mens” and “womens.” There are standard tests and some sport-specific tests that measure an individual’s projected natural physical potential (such as strength, stamina etc.) and pheromone level. These are used to try to group athletes into the “tier” that best matches their physical abilities, indiscriminate to gender identity, and the number of tiers depends on the sport. Juniors may or may not be separated into tiers at all, but either way are re-tested prior to competing as adults or post-presenting and may be re-categorized. For pair skating/ice dancing/other sports that are traditionally man-woman duos in our universe, a pair’s eligibility is calculated based on a combined numerical value of their physical/pheromone points, which cannot be less than or greater than a certain range.

Figure skating has two tiers and Yuuri/Victor/Yurio/most of the gang compete in “Tier 2,” which tends to be more dominated by alphas/beta men. Some changes: Mila (alpha) and Sara (gamma-alpha) also compete in Tier 2, whereas Guang-Hong (omega) and Mickey (gamma-omega) compete in Tier 1. With his more beta-like physique and impressive stamina, Yuuri was told that despite being an omega he was on the border so could choose his tier and he chose Tier 2 to be in the same group as Victor. Most of the male figure skaters in the cast are alpha/beta because they all compete in the same Tier.

~~

~~

OC Kids

NOTE: They all have hyphenated last names with Katsuki first so they’ll be together alphabetically. They all attend international school in wherever country they happen to be in at the time and are all raised English/Japanese/Russian/Thai multi-lingual though I’ll probably be too lazy to show it in comics ^ ^; Full Name Explanations for the kids

Am open to suggestions for names for the pets  I’ve been calling them “dog,” “dog mini,” “cat,” and “ham” in my head bc that’s admittedly what I often call my pets in rl oops

-Yasha Katsuki-Nikiforov (older fraternal twin, conceived when Yuuri is 27 and Victor is 31) - Looks near identical to his twin except for coloration and hair part differences. Looks angelic but is a master at manipulating adults. Has perfected the poker face and is hard to read. In contrast to his ever cheerful smile he can be extremely blunt and rude. Doesn’t really care to make friends outside his siblings. He doesn’t admit to being as dependent on his little brother as Shura is on him but they’re very much inseparable. Takes great joy in terrorizing Yakov.

-Shura Katsuki-Plisetsky (younger fraternal twin, conceived when Yuuri is 27 and Yurio is 19) - The other near-identical twin, he is almost always glued to Yasha’s side. It’s partly out of competitiveness, but mostly because they both just want to do everything together. Despite their similar appearances, he’s the polar opposite of his brother in many ways. He chooses not to appear friendly to outsiders, but is also completely incapable of hiding his emotions and is very much an open book. He’s openly hostile and fiercely jealous of anyone who tries to take away his siblings’ attention, but is extremely affectionate to those he loves.

-Arisa Katsuki-Chulanont (3 years younger daughter, conceived when Yuuri is 30 and Phichit is 27) - Charming, friendly, and easy to please, she seems like she’d be the easiest child to raise after her brothers. Unfortunately, she has both her adoring older brothers wrapped around her little finger and realizes very early on that she can ask them to do almost anything for her. Combined with her rather sadistic streak, this leads to quite a few extreme mischief incidents the likes of which the twins would not have been able to conceive of by themselves. She’s terrifyingly smart and has a knack for reading people both in person and on social media, which she takes to very early. Unlike her more aloof, intimidating, or just plain unapproachable older brothers, their sister is extremely sociable, likable and popular among her peers...or she would be, if said terrifying older brothers didn’t scare them off first with their possessiveness and jealousy. This has lead to her becoming somewhat of an elevated queen on a pedestal, from whom the other kids can only wish they could get a smile or a few words of praise.

-Yuuji Katsuki-Minami (3 years younger than Arisa, conceived when Yuuri is 33 and Minami is 27; not pictured in the family portrait on this post bc not born yet) - Looks JUST like Yuuri when he was younger (+ tooth). Extremely happy and energetic and outgoing, he follows his older siblings everywhere. He’s extremely trusting and gullible, but while the other siblings sometimes like to tease Shura, Yuuji is coddled and protected. Has super powerful puppy eyes and uses them unintentionally to maximum effect. Really loves food and shouting nice things about everyone.

the adults sigh very loudly and wonder how their kids turned out this way...oh wait...

-a large poodle (Makkachin passed away from old age…;_;)

-a toy poodle

-Potya - Yurio’s now very old and crotchety cat

-Phichit’s hamster that likes to taunt said cat

~~

Thanks for reading! Again, for links to the other content in this AU including comics, illustrations, and headcanon posts, check out the “Future!verse ABO” section of my YOI Art Masterpost HERE!

~~

Like this post? Interested in supporting the artist and encouraging the creation of more similar works? Please consider supporting me through Patreon or Ko-Fi!

[adamlynnch]

Check Please!: fic recs

these are mostly nurseydex heavy but there are some good ones. I’ll tag ships just incase.

*Crossed Wires by lecrivaineanonyme

14k, Oneshot, T (nurseydex)

Will snorts. "You are unreal,” he says, shaking his head. “I’ve had people in here crying because they downloaded a virus that can be removed in two minutes, and here you are with pie-filling in your computer, joking about how at least you didn’t fucking put rice in it.”

Derek grins. “It’s chill,” he replies, scratching the back of his neck. “Why worry? I know you got my back.”

Also known as the one where Nursey is constantly fucking up his laptop and Dex is the lucky Best Buy employee who gets to fix it.

*Mixing It Up by sinspiration

40k, Multi-chapter, M (zimbits)

Eric Bittle, of Bitty's Bakery, is very excited to have been chosen as a contestant for the Food Network Challenge. He's even more excited to find out that he's making a cake for the NHL new-Cup winners, the Falconers.

Jack Zimmerman, of the Falconers, doesn't know anything about cake, and will be the first to tell you that he feels wholly unqualified to judge a cake-making competition. At least Alexei is there to help ease things a little. Honestly, all he's really expecting is to be very awkward on camera for the entire segment, and to eat a lot of cake that's not really in his diet plan.

That's how it starts.

*how to not fall in love with your best friend + other holiday activities by quidhitch

7k, Oneshot, M (holsom)

When Ransom meets Adam Birkholtz for the first time he’s wearing a t-shirt that’s half a size too small for him, jeans that are worn out in the ratty way, and Birkenstocks that look about a thousand years old. His glasses are crooked on his nose and he introduces himself with a loud, booming laugh even though Ransom hasn’t said anything particularly funny. Ransom thinks it’s the kind of laugh that moves mountains, full and round and beautiful.

“Everyone calls me Holster,” Adam says, squeezing Ransom’s hand before he lets it go.

“Cool,” Ransom’s smile back is a reflex, the easiest, most natural response to Holster’s toothy grin. “I’m Ransom.”

“Sick nickname,” Holster tosses an arm around Ransom’s shoulder’s without warning. He is very large and very warm, and his breath smells like cinnamon. “You know what, Ransom? I think we’re gonna be tight.”

*I Know I Am, But What Are You? by sysrae

19k, Multi-chapter, E (nurseydex)

“I need you,” says Dex, “to be my fake date at my family Christmas. Please.” “Cool,” says Nursey, mouth operating on Chill Autopilot while his higher brain functions come to a screeching halt. “I can do that.”

first love, late spring by lehtonen

12k, Oneshot, M (holsom)

“Right.” Ransom still looks serious, but there’s a sinister glint in his eye that Holster gloomily recognises as contemplation. “What’s in it for us?”

Holster whips his head round to stare at him so fast his neck twinges in three different places. “Nothing is in it for us,” he hisses sotto voce, “or did you not hear the part where we’d be dating?”

handful of crazy stars by alwaysayes

2k, Oneshot, T (nurseydex)

your name is derek nurse and your world is on fire and will is your sun and your moon and stars and your entire virgo supercluster and you know that you are his too. your name is derek nurse and for the first time in your life you may have something other than hockey to keep you going because he makes you strong and you make him strong and together you are inescapable and magical and radiant and everything in the world that you will ever need because you have each other.

*The Huntsman and the Bard by rhysiana

9k, Oneshot, T (nurseydex)

Derek Nurse has cut it extremely fine on finding a cover story location for their New England travel magazine's fall issue, but he the pumpkin farm he just came across looks almost too good to be real. If only he can get the taciturn owner to agree to an interview...

Dex has no interest in an interview, or any kind of publicity. He's just trying to live a normal, mundane life, far, far away from the politics of the Faerie Court and his mother. But this journalist is proving oddly persuasive...

In which things go right, and then they go very, very wrong. Faerie queens do not like to be denied.

All I Ask by nickbonino

1k, Oneshot, T (holsom)

Ransom had been at March’s for a little under two hours, one last afternoon together before Ransom went to kiss the ice goodbye that evening, when he got the call. Bitty sounded almost frantic but was clearly trying hard to hide it.

“Ransom, I think you should come home. I don’t know what’s going on but I think you should be here.” Bitty’s voice rose as he spoke and Ransom heard what sounded like him banging on a door.

“Bits, I’m sorry dude but I’m kinda busy. Can’t you just sort whatever it is?” He tried to sound as apologetic as possible but Bitty was having none of it.

“Holster won’t open his door, Rans! I can hear him cr-. Just come home,” Bitty ordered, with a note of finality Ransom wasn’t prepared to argue with.

“Yeah, yeah okay. I’ll be there in five,” he sighed and hung up.

*and we dance like angels do by benvolio

7k, Oneshot, T

"Bitty is a literal angel. Not just the whole angelic metaphor concerning how his blond hair probably forms a wispy halo around him when the light hits him from behind or anything. Real deal angel."

Inspired by tumblr user cardamom 

all this war just to win by lehtonen

8k, Oneshot, E (nurseydex)

“You want me to shut up?” Dex takes a step back, triumphant, his eyes flashing. “Make me.”

Or: Dex and Nursey hook up, but they're still a mess.

*if we bite (the pain is sweet) by shellybelle

57k, Multi-chapter, E (nurseydex)

After two and a half semesters at Samwell, Dex has gotten used to people handling their stress in weird ways. Bitty bakes up a storm, Lardo is constantly covered in what Dex really, really hopes is paint, Ransom turns into a curled-up ball of anxiety on the nearest flat surface. He gets it: people are just weird here.

That doesn’t mean he doesn’t choke on his Red Bull when Nursey sighs, “God, I’m so tense right now. I just really need to suck a dick, y’know?”

(Or: five times Dex and Nursey really don’t quite know what they’re doing, and one time they’ve really, really figured it out.)

dots and dashes. by katarama

1k, Oneshot, T (nurseydex)

It took him a longest to warm up to Nursey, to feel comfortable with much more contact than a fistbump after a celly. There were the incessant “chill”s that grated on Dex’s nerves more than they should’ve. There was also the voice in the back of Dex’s head to be careful, because once everyone found out he liked boys, there was no helping the fact that things with Nursey would get weird.

Now, they’ve come far enough that he’s sitting on the grass with Nursey’s head in his lap by the pond, the sun finally warm enough in May to have melted all the ice and snow.

Cheiloproclitic by akadiene

1k, Oneshot, T (zimbits)

Cheiloproclitic - Being attracted to someones lips.

Jack really likes kissing.

all that you've conquered by whimsicalimages

10k, Oneshot, T (nurseydex)

“Drunk Nursey doesn’t write checks that sober Nursey can’t cash,” Nursey tells him very seriously.

Or: William J. Poindexter’s sister is getting married, which means, among other things, that he has to learn how to dance.

Close by tiptoe39

23k, Multi-chapter, E (zimbits)

They’ve been together for a month and a half. Now they need to learn how to be close.

A Madison/Fourth of July fic

[almaasi]

reaction post typed while watching the JIBcon 2017 Jensen & Misha panel

um............this is........ kind of gay

under the cut: my casual thoughts on Cockles, Jensen in heat, a lil bit of Destiel, and a small dose of toxic masculinity because man it just keeps coming back to that

08:00pm

PART 1

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=esVT4rZ1F0M&ab_channel=thiniassk

i’m not fucking prepared honestly oh god

-

08:12pm

i have petted my cat diezel and i am slightly more prepared

-

08:14

it STARTS with them singing to each other?!?!?! 

jensen gets so much of his energy from misha he can’t address a crowd without first staring deeply into misha’s eyes??? IS THIS THEM SOULBONDING BEFOREHAND SO THEY MAKE A BETTER TEAM

miSHA TURNS AWAY IT’S JUST JENSEN SERENADING MISH OH GOD

-

jensen: *leans in for no reason*

-

08:17

HE DOES SO MUCH OPEN-HANDED REACHING 

-

08:18

j: “the hairs on my arms are standing up”

m: “he was just showing me his freckles”

j: “who don’t love freckles *winky face* know what i’m saying”

m: “you wanna hear something weird”

J: “SHUT UP”

MISHA WAS GONNA SAY FRECKLES ARE ANGEL KISSES AND JENSEN VETOED IT

THIS IS THE ONLY OPTION

-

08:20

YES MISHA putting a chair backwards stops you worrying about crotch-staring

j: “oh no, i enjoy showing my crotch the entire time”

m: “i know”

j: “i don’t have to hide it”

...........................surely this is illegal

-

08:2

j: “let’s see how deep it goes”

(talking about the crowd size?)

m: “by which she means it’s an innie”

(talking about navels maybe?? not sure how we got here?)

(OR DICK FORESKIN WHO KNOWS)

JENSEN YOUR FACE

WHAT

-

08:25

? i think jensen moved to cover his crotch jokingly aND MISHA REACHES IN TO UN-COVER HIS CROTCH

;A;

-

08:28

j: *faces misha and spreads his legs* “here’s the thing. pick a leg”

WAT THE FIDSAHFSF I???

-

08:29

jensen wants misha to choose between his bowlegs??? OH NO

I JUST GOT IT

HE STANDS UP TO DO THE DICK-ADJUSTMENT DANCE

RIGHT NEXT TO MISHA

“PICK A LEG” IS ABOUT WHICH LEG HIS DICK SITS AGAINST

why the fuck does he want MISHA to choose what the fuck this is so fucking gay what the fuck

misha claims out loud he’s uncomfortable but frankly he doesn’t look that uncomfortable

-

08:32

jesus christ jensen is flat-out turning everything into flirtation

j: “you have big dolls?”

(regarding the mini-dads misha has in his house)

JENSEN HOW BADLY DO YOU WANT THIS GUY TO FUCK YOU

WOW

-

08:34

such blush

...and jensen starts hitting himself in the head as self-chastisement for flirting????????????????????????????????????????????????

-

08:36

https://youtu.be/esVT4rZ1F0M?t=4m8s

fig 1: jensen believably pretending he doesn’t know what “firework[s]” by katy perry is

fig 2: telling the truth “of course i know what ‘firework’ is, i have a 4 year old daughter” (correcting misha’s addition of the ‘s’ at the end, i must note) “i DANCE to firework”

....but like.......jensen’s process of ”i don’t know what this potentially emasculating thing is at all”.... “did i mention this thing is close to my heart and know it intimately”

does that sound like “talk about cutting the fat”/”who’s cas?”/”misha who?” to anyone else? hurr

THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT DEAN DOES. BLAH BLAH BLAH THEY’RE DIFFERENT PEOPLE But tHEY DO THE SAME SHIT WHEN IT COMES TO ~EMASCULATING~ THINGS

granted jensen does it easier and more jokingly than dean does, but he STILL DOES IT

(also? jensen asked misha what’s on west’s playlist and requested he be honest, probably knowing full-well what’s on there (and there’s something dodgy there to be honest about). jensen pretends he doesn’t know the song, misha reaches in to touch him and says “you would be off on a lot of [these songs]-- AND THAT’S WHEN JENSEN REVEALS THE TRUTH TO PROVE HE’S NOT ALL COUNTRY FOLK SINGER and then blames his knowledge of popular songs on his daughter rather than the fact it’s impossible to go through modern life without having heard that song)

(he serenades misha with a few lines before mocking the song)

(i wonder if he’s ever sung it to misha in private)

-

08:50

jensen: *finger over his lips as misha’s talking about his kids singing carry on wayward son in the car* i.e. ~don’t say the thing~

j: “is what you told me earlier public knowledge? ‘cause that’s kind of a nice segue”

it’s nice that he asks

m: *high pitched voice* whyyy did i tell him

SO HE CAN RELAY YOUR CUTE STORIES TO US WITH HIS PRETTY POUTY BLABBERMOUTH, THAT’S WHY

-

j: *leans in to whisper and ask about the story he wants to tell*

m: NO NO ON ON O

wow that’s gotta be a damning story holy shit

-

m: “i am actually having palpitations right now”

I REALLY WANT TO KNOWWWWW AAAH

-

08:56

j: “real men have twins”

....wtf

j: *looking apologetically at misha* “aaah it’s just a shirt somebody sent me, it was pretty cool”

...........wtf even more because why are you apologising to misha wtf

(after the panel i came back and read this and I JUST GOT IT. i thought “have twins” meant the man in question has a human duplicate sibling. but it actually means the man in question has two offspring who are born at the same time. welp.)

-

08:58

bless daniella for getting these boys so fucking drunk

drunk!jensen is kind of.... look i dont wanna say it as a slur but also i do really wanna say it.... he’s kind of a slut?

god i love how much he’s enjoying himself aaah

-

09:00pm

here we have jensen laughing way too hard at misha’s “i am not a spy... which is exactly what spies say” accent

j: “that one got me. i dunno why”

BECAUSE YOU’RE HOPELESSLY IN LOVE AND ALSO DRUNK

-

09:03

rip fluffy unicorn

jensen for someone with a 4 year old daughter you very quickly, very unnecessarily, AND VERY VIOLENTLY reject soft fluffy cute things your daughter would like

someone tell me again how he’s not fuelled at least 25% by toxic masculinity

-

j: *to the unicorn* “fuck you steven”

what did steven ever do to you

-

see this is where dean and jensen differ. dean would maybe sneer at the unicorn but he’d keep it if it was given to him by someone who cared about him (the in-show version of daniella?). he’d give it to a little kid. smile, play with it for 10 seconds if no-one else was watching. but jensen? THROWS IT AND INSULTS IT AND HATES IT FOR EXISTING

like dean and jensen are both haters of soft cute things (in front of people) but in totally different ways

jensen’s hatred seems kinda disingenuous to me ?

and waaaaay over the top, maybe just because there’s a crowd

WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO PROVE

who exactly in that room would think any less of him if he said “aw cute” and hugged the thing on his lap, y’know? the room would be full of cheering. i feel like he’s only doing the act for self-comfort idk

it’s a soft unicorn .........i don’t get it

it’s a kicking machine with a death spike

IF IT WAS MADE OF PLASTIC AND LOOKED LIKE A ROBOT WOULD HE REACT THE SAME WAY THOUGH

(not that i dislike him for this, i’m just commenting on what i observe. he fascinates me. how did he get like this? WHAT COTTON CANDY PLUSHIE ABUSED HIM IN A PREVIOUS LIFE)

-

09:16

regarding superstitions: jensen steps right foot first onto airplanes, it hasn’t failed him yet. misha “always wears something akin to orange underwear”

OH NO HERE WE GO

-

j: “wait seriously?”

jensen looks fascinated...and awed

does he not know this stuff already? do they not talk about weird personal stuff outside of conventions?

-

okay well jensen is definitely adding “lucky orange underwear” to his list of things to imagine while he’s lying in bed with his hand between his legs

-

09:23

jensen’s lil finger wiggle to encourage misha to take his pants off?????

-

09:26

k but why did the convention crew turn the lights pink when jensen dropped his pants for misha

-

jensen to misha: “you can’t unsee that”

misha, kinda shaken: “no, i’m trying”

WHAT THE FUCK WAS JENSEN WEARING

AND WHY WAS IT SO BAD THAT WE COULDN’T SEE TOO

my current theory: a cock sock (maybe so jensen doesn’t get visible boners and/or panty lines??)

like this (WARNING NSFW NSFW)

-

j to misha: “rawr”

........................STOP

j: “you didn’t even get the full picture”

OKAY THAT’S IT IT’S GOTTA BE A COCK SOCK RIGHT ASDFSJF

-

m: “now would be a good time to take a 10 minute break”

AND WHAT DO YOU PROPOSE YOU AND JENSEN DO IN THAT TIME SIR

KINDLY DO SHARE

-

09:32

fan: “[jared] was kind of away with the fairies”

j: “no he’s been a fairy all day”

and THEN HE LOOKS AT MISHA EXPECTING A REACTION

is it just me or is jensen perfectly aware when his jokes are potentially homophobic and he’s checking with misha to see if it’s okay?? because i guess misha is the in-house feminist and if jensen goes a minute without misha’s approval he knows he needs to start sucking up and grovelling

-

J: “misha kept us out late” MORE RAWRING

like does he just wanna go behind the curtain and blow him ‘case i think we’d all wait patiently

(apparently completely unrelated, except by connection of “they wanna bang”) jensen: “by the way they go down to here” *points to mid-thigh*

someone mentioned maybe he was wearing a brand called ethika underwear on some post i made yesterday, i had a look at their website and it just seemed like perfectly normal boxers just with some funky prints

idk why that would make misha gawp so madly though, if it was just a loud print. or why that would mean the audience can’t see. it had to be something about the cut of them, too. (unless there was a tiger or something on them. i think i saw cat faces on the website)

also why is jensen so keen on telling misha about his underwear

...this is some exposure kink bullshit honestly

he’s not shy in the slightest, he’s getting off on making misha squirm

-

09:42

fan: “people who work together frequently develop habits/quirks”

j: “undoing your pants in front of each other”

fan: “probably not as many people do that”

j: “no”

they know how gay they are. they know. they know we think they’re fucking. they don’t care. they encourage it. why. jensen is absolutely revelling in this. he has not one single problem with people shipping him with misha

and i am dying because of it

-

09:45

fan: “i was wondering if there’s anything that doesn’t involve your pants--”

*jensen shakes his head*

fan: “--that you only do around each other”

jensen covers his mouth ~don’t say the thing~

oh no

(bless this question-asker)

-

09:49

AND HERE MISHA GOES CHANGING THE TONE BECAUSE JENSEN CAN ONLY THINK OF INAPPROPRIATE THINGS

-

PART 2

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T0BnSu26yjE&ab_channel=thiniassk

-

09:53

m: “jensen came in, his eyes were red, i gave him a hug... jensen said - i’m quoting here - don’t do that”

(jensen smiles)

-

m: “we have these brief interstitials”

OOH interstitials. what a good word

-

09:55

when misha is talking, jensen listens. he LISTENS. he reacts in real time.

when jared talks, he zones out so much more often, or at least acts like he does (”i’m sorry, what were you saying? i zoned out”)

idk what to make of it

-

10:01

jensen’s lil speech <3

also bless daniella for always being the hero we need

-

10:05

jensen’s like ~welp i just spilled my heart out!! time for a circus act and some unicorn violence

-

10:06

DAT NECK SQUISH THO

-

i wasn’t expecting it to turn into this

... this panel has so much more jensen than misha. misha’s so quiet and still. and jensen’s so animated and talkative and aggressive and affectionate ??

is misha sick, tired, or upset?

-

10:10

https://youtu.be/T0BnSu26yjE?t=9m5s

fan asks what dean and cas would do together on a scooter in rome

m: “WHEN IN ROME”

and jensen looks at him like his gay innuendo alarm is flashing red

.....but like. they’re in rome. when in rome. gay things happen in rome. yes?

m: “NAUGHH NO you’re taking this the wrong way, i just mean ‘when in rome’ i just mean, show each other our underwear”

NOT ANY LESS GAY

AND NOW IT’S COCKLES AS WELL AS DESTIEL

++ misha referring to dean and castiel’s underwear as “our” underwear

m: “NOT ANYTHING WEIRD.”

what’s weird misha. what would you classify as weird. tell us.

*jensen’s dead eyed blue steel*

m: “YOU CAN’T LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT ANY MORE BECAUSE OF WHAT YOU DID” (misha’s voice breaks)

MISHA RAWRS

OH NO

-

.........................jensen sPREADS his legs

oh no

JENSEN COULD YOU LITERALLY ACT ANY MORE LIKE YOU’RE IN HEAT

FUCK

-

10:18

this person’s head is blocking my goddamn view

-

but 

jensen

what is the purpose of your face

-

10:20

https://youtu.be/T0BnSu26yjE?t=10m47s

fan: what would dean and cas do in rome, “a holiday” ?

m: *to jensen* “where do you GO with that?”

j *flirty*: “i know where i’m goin’~”

IN WHAT WAY EXACTLY COULD THIS BE INTERPRETED IN A NON-DESTIEL NON-GAY WAY

I‘M TRULY, TRULY STRUGGLING

look why don’t they just say “dean and cas would rent a hotel room and fuck the shit out of each other for five days straight” OH YEAH BECAUSE THAT’S TOO CLOSE TO THE TRUTH RIGHT

BUT THAT’S WHAT THEY’RE BASICALLY SAYING ANYWAY

they could’ve said “eat all the italian food” and “check out some of the monuments, dean and cas probably haven’t seen a lot of that stuff, cas knows all the history since he was alive in ancient times, and jensen would really appreciate a holiday spn episode in the future” BUT NO

THEY DELIBERATELY LEAVE IT OPEN AND MAKE SURE EVERYONE’S THINKING ABOUT ROMANTIC GAY SEX

forget the underwear exposure, i need all the gifs of this and all the meta

THIS IS WAY GAYER

i’mma puke rainbows brb

-

10:28

misha tries to save it with “the colosseum” BUT JENSEN’S FACE IS ALREADY LIKE “I SAID A GAY THING DIDN’T I”

misha: *rushed* “yes great question thank you”

THAT WAS IN NO WAY THEM AVOIDING “DEAN AND CAS WOULD MAKE LOVE”

NGHGHNH

m: “i don’t know how you’d answer that. i feel like there’s a lot of..”

daniella: *says something*

m: “go to the vatican?”

nope. hopeless. it’s too late, you can’t save this misha, it’s already gay.

-

fan: “can you explain why cas is driving the motorcycle and not dean?”

i love this person and their suspiciously gay questions

https://youtu.be/T0BnSu26yjE?t=11m49s

(can anyone figure out what jensen says when misha’s saying “dean actually drives the impala but...”)

-

PART 3

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xr1d_7fG5zA&ab_channel=thiniassk

-

10:36

AW MAN EVERYONE RUSHED ON STAGE AND I WANTED TO HEAR JENSEN’S ANSWER TO WHATEVER THE QUESTION WAS!!!! he did comedy elbows followed by throat stroking and lots of thinking I WANTED TO KNOW WHAT WAS SO DIFFICULT TO EXPRESS

-

10:40

https://youtu.be/Xr1d_7fG5zA?t=3m7s

MISHA DUCKS AND HE PUTS HIS FINGERS IN HIS EARS

gimme the gifs friends i need them

-

10:42

THIS IS THE LAST JIBCON??????? NOOOOOOOOO WHAT

WAit wait---- wait............

DANIELLA says: “LOOKS LIKE THERE’S GOING TO BE ANOTHER ONE”

YYYYYAAAAAAAAAAYYYYY MORE COCKLES

fsjdgfd that was scary

-

daniella’s crying

oh god i love her so much

YESSS SHE DESERVES TO HAVE HER NAME CHANTED BY A CROWD

-

10:46

did jensen and misha leave the stage? i’ve lost them

did they go off for a bathroom quickie or what

-

10:48

the endddddddd

ahh i’m exhausted now

in short: jensen’s head over heels in love, horny, in heat, and definitely spreads his legs in bed

misha? seems a lil upset. quiet. not as energetic as he usually is, which was surprising given jensen’s highkey flirtation. this panel was a lot of jensen and not a whole lot of misha, or misha+jensen as a pair. jensen was throwing a ton of sexual energy at misha and not getting much of anything back. 

idk how to feel about it, but a tiny bit of me is disappointed? and maybe a tad concerned. however, that said, they did make it fun and interesting AND SUPER FUCKING GAY

this panel reiterated to me that romantic destiel is a thing and they know it, and anything jensen says against that is just consciously-created bullshit

also? he lies really easily and really well. and it’s usually to protect some kind of face-value manly-man thing. even if he counteracts it within seconds.

but i find it very interesting how he looks to misha as his source of how much masculinity he’s required to protect. he asks misha “too much?” regarding the unicorn violence, and looks at him any time he made a gay or unfeminist joke that was a little risque (the “fairy” thing about jared, the “real men have twins” shirt)

it’s like misha’s his gatekeeper for gayness and softness, jensen clearly trusts him implicitly, and vice versa (although misha seems shaky on that, second-guessing why he told jensen a private story which jensen wanted to tell but misha was all NO NO NO OMFG)

but IMAGINE HOW MANY SECRETS THEY HAVE TOGETHER

OH NO

hopefully there’ll be some more cockles soon ...but at least we have hawaiicon to look forward to in november!! =u=

[askkav-archived]

Characters : The warlords. All of them. ( aka : Boa,Buggy,Blackbeard, Crocodile,Doflamingo, Jinbei, Kuma, Law, Mihawk, Moria, and that wannabe whitebeard son. Edward Weevil )

GIVE ME A CHARACTER | ( X )

*Sweats* Julie, Why… ;=;

It’s super long and so it’s under a read more also crosses off OTPS bc shit’s irrevelant to my constant shippy ass.

Blackbeard

How I feel about this character:

First thought when I saw him first: Look at this dumbass

My current thought: Look at this dumbass

My probably future thoughts; Ugh, I don’t want to look at this dumbass

I actually; for once, don’t like this character - you might think it’s based off of his looks, ew, never assume I dislike a character on appearances alone. I appear and seem shallow but I’m really not, it’s like a cover. Well disguised cover.

I hate his personality traits. 

He acts so high on power; like he’s untouchable and unbeatable but the moment he knows he’s on the losing side, he’ll cry, cower and ask for mercy like the sniveling little shit he is.

He reminds of people I pushed out of my life for a good reason. Weak, manipulative and conniving.

But you know what; the fact that he’s able to will this sort of reaction and feelings - shows that he’s a good character, good at what he’s doing. I can respect that.

All the people I ship romantically with this character

Can’t ship what you don’t understand. ( X )

My non-romantic relationships for this character

Death; slow and painful death. And my foot. Up his ass.

My unpopular opinion about this character

Why does anyone like him? (Joking, it’s like how people ask how do I like Akainu and this character - dude chill.)

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

Shit himself.

Boa Hancock

How I feel about this character

You know; I can fit a whole lot of shit of words but goddamn I love them - GIVE ME MORE OF BOA, BOA IN LOVE, BOA WHO KICKS BITCHES LEFT AND RIGHT!! Just give me more of her, I know we know a lot about her as it is; but just…

My love~

All the people I ship romantically with this character

Luffy? Like the mushy kind, the lovey-dovey kind and Luffy is oblivious and doesn’t care-kind. I’ll stand by you Boa. (But plz marry me…)

I probably ship them with other girls; give me some and I’m like ‘fuck yeah’

(( ;///; And Kav, maybe, maybe a lot… ))

My non-romantic relationships for this character

Her sisters, the island and crew she rules over and that previous snake princess - they’re all her bros.

My unpopular opinion about this character

I often see she gets shit for being in love with Luffy - the only known character (ofc besides Zoro) that hasn’t shown the sort of attraction to Boa and cares not for who she is but she’s cool because she helps him out.

I find it cute honestly but if Boa kicked my ass, I would find that cute so… go figure. Though honestly a few authors need to write better female characters tbh so… whatever.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

Come back to me and in canon! That’s all and also kick more people’s asses.

Buggy

How I feel about this character

Eh not much to say; I kind of don’t like clowns or characters who look like one. But he’s alright

All the people I ship romantically with this character

Himself and a mirror, maybe a bit of Mr.3/Galdino

My non-romantic relationships for this character

His crew. Galdino, Shanks, Luffy - he  can be pretty cool buds with a lot of people.

My unpopular opinion about this character

Uh… For a clown, he’s not very funny. Actually most clowns are terrifying...

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

Like others, become relevant to the story line, maybe?

Crocodile

How I feel about this character

Great character, but like the majority in One Piece - overconfident and arrogant, like it’s kind of why y’all get your ass kicked by a boy. Age doesn’t mean maturity or all your decisions are made wisely.

I would like to know more about his backstory, we got everyone else’s because they’re going to be pushed aside but him - he needs his and I’m waiting.

All the people I ship romantically with this character

He’s not a really trusting man; much like Doflamingo - like a lot of these older pirates aren’t trusting either.

No romantic ships for this one either. (Most of my faves don’t have romantic options, fuck love, right?)

My non-romantic relationships for this character

Platonically, there’s very little - I often see Luffy and Crocodile getting along, as well as Daz. Daz can be a little more than platonic though.

J-just everyone wants to screw Croc and I have no understanding why but god, that arrogance and I think I’m better than you attitude is just. Nice!

He fucks everyone at some point, maybe.

My unpopular opinion about this character

Nothing in mind.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

Perhaps come back; most likely go back to your villainous roots, maybe? I don’t know.

Doflamingo

How I feel about this character

Fuck boi, fight me, like right now.

No but seriously, I gravitated to this character more than any other in this series - his love for pink, his carefree nature and his controlling tendencies - Like a moth to a flame and I’m willing to burn in hell for them.

I spend the better part of being in this fandom hyperfixated on them, oops.

But yeah, I do that often actually - I base my life around characters to keep me somewhat sane and emotionally stable. Too bad for everyone though, me fixating on him made me more honest, mayde me more egotistical and so goddamn flamboyant.

He teaches you to be you and that’s cool. I love Doflamingo but I’mma slam dunk his ass down a trash chute.

All the people I ship romantically with this character

If you want a romantic ship with this character, well you know - it wouldn’t be very romantic because he’s not the type to let go easily; he holds onto you because you belong to him and well, if you aren’t strong or capable, expect death being your only way out.

(Toxic-ly ships both Kav and Doflamingo)

My non-romantic relationships for this character

Platonically, everyone in his family this includes Law and his Corazon.

Sexually, there’s more than a few actually besides Kav - because of course, I ship Kav and Doflamingo seeing as Kavandria’s story was made with Doflamingo in mind.

Katakuri though… A crackship Katakuri and Doflamingo, just don’t tell my sweet love.

My unpopular opinion about this character

Eh I got none at the moment.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

YOU COULD HAVE PREVENTED THAT SHITSHOW IN DRESSROSA, YOU ASSHOLE!!!! I am so pissed off with how your story just ends like that… I wanted more from you and I was so disappointed.

Jinbei

How I feel about this character

Mm I think I used to think he was cool; not as much. He’s okay.

All the people I ship romantically with this character

None.

My non-romantic relationships for this character

Luffy and crew; along with his own

My unpopular opinion about this character

Too hyped up

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

Nothing really.

Kuma

How I feel about this character

Not much to go on about them really; though his objectives is mysterious and I wonder about them seeing as he helped out the strawhats in his own way.

All the people I ship romantically with this character

No one I can imagine.

My non-romantic relationships for this character

Ivankov? People back at the Revolutionary army? I don’t know. I wasn’t really invested in him.

My unpopular opinion about this character

Nothing.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

Tell us more about him next time. I’m tired of vague things tbh…

Law

How I feel about this character

He alright though I kind of wish he kept that “I wanna destroy everything” sort of mindset, honestly - the terrible and horrible things he would have unleashed onto this world with his powers, ooh~

Yeah but he’s alright.

All the people I ship romantically with this character

Nobody, really.

(Unless it’s Kav ;=; They’re both snarky and would hate each other, which makes it all the more better. There’s a trend with my ships, isn’t there?)

My non-romantic relationships for this character

Platonically, there’s his crew, there’s Luffy tho and Zoro. People here and there, whatever. I’m more interested in his powers and what he could do with them.

My unpopular opinion about this character

Eh, pretty boy - too emo, ugh. Much like Ace, you know...

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

Wish he wasn’t a fuckass and was bent on revenge; a man saves your life and then you dedicate your life to kill another a man? For what? Nothing. He didn’t even die, you failed! Boo.

Mihawk

How I feel about this character

Beautiful human being and I think he’s great; only because of Julie (like I never would have thought of him - yeah he was one of the characters I liked because he’s a warlord etc)

But you got me hooked even more ;=;

All the people I ship romantically with this character

Huh, I can’t think of anyone - he doesn’t seem like a romantic character, but I say this about myself and everyone so I’m a terrible judge of character.

Ships them with Kav though.

My non-romantic relationships for this character

Perona and Zoro are like his kids, right? I guess, though I think it’s more like a guardian sort of thing - not parental, he just guides them.

Shanks is another, he complements that quiet guy honestly - it’s nice for those who are introverted or silent to have that one loud and happy-go-lucky friend.

I would love to see more warlord interactions honestly ;=;

My unpopular opinion about this character

Like many, I don’t have like set opinions about characters. It changes frequently.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

Please, show up more.

Moriah

How I feel about this character

You know, I don’t say this often - much like Gin and a couple of side characters or antagonists, Moriah has made an impact on me. What affected me a lot is that expression when he spoke about his crew - I can relate, I don’t want to lose anyone important to me and when we do, it’s a huge loss on our psyche and our mentality from then on.

I love him honestly.

He’s lazy, he’s got an agenda and he acknowledges it. Honest, he’s just out right with what he thinks. He’s not physically appealing and his theme is halloweeny, what a weeny. The guy wears fishnet… Amazing!

All the people I ship romantically with this character

No one, really.

My non-romantic relationships for this character

His crew; whomever they were - Moriah deserves to have his friends and crew. A father/daughter relationship between him and Perona.

I don’t know what else beyond that. I don’t think he’s a sexual character; he might seem like it but people and characters can surprise you.

My unpopular opinion about this character

Eh, I never really make fun of people or even character’s appearances - I just can’t do it, because you know… I’m not that terrible of a person. And I know it’s suppose to be, you know, funny but my sort of my fun or humor is like at no one’s expense.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

Please, come back? You didn’t die. Also fuck up Kaido, he’s bleh… Reminds me of someone I know and I think he deserves to keel over.

Weevil

How I feel about this character

Ew

All the people I ship romantically with this character

No one deserves to have this man child to care for

My non-romantic ships or otherwise relationships for this character

His Momma - she appreciates him I suppose but only for his power and his dumbness.

My unpopular opinion about this character

Mm nothing in mind

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

Probably become relevant at some point, along with other characters too.