#seriously how is it so popular yet hard to find merch for???

[videogeistt]

I need you fiddauthor fans to start making merch or I'll cry.

[azaffranist]

Frozen 2 deleted/early content

On the road to F2 there were tons of leaks and I saved as many of them as I could in the fear that Disney would delete them (because they loved to shut down whole websites because of that back in the day). As a result I have a lot of pictures saved on my phone and looking back on them... some don’t sound quite right because it’s definitely not what I saw in the movie. So here’s everythinggg I have. I did my best to organize stuff a bit but there are so many things it was... hard. Feel free to add more stuff in reblogs, replies and such!

Something to note is that we won’t take into account the “officially” released deleted content, which would include everything that’s in the Blu-ray, because basically everyone already saw that (Home, I Seek the Truth, Get This Right, Unmeltable Me, the Secret Room scene, Hard Nokks, etc). Generally, we won’t be analyzing deleted scenes from the official trailers, either, because of this very reason. Something “official” that we will consider, though, are the deleted clips animators have been releasing on Instagram and other sites, because those aren’t that popular.

Before starting here’s the link to all the deleted F2 lines I could find as well as some other additions. The post itself has even more links to other posts containing deleted content so have fun clicking on links. 

Last thing to mention, none of the merch photos here are taken by me. I got most of them from the leaks channel of the Arendelle Kingdom server during 2019. If any image in this post belongs to someone here and you want to be credited please let me know and I’ll edit the post.

This post is long. Like really, really, lagging-my-browser-as-I’m-writing-it long. So grab some popcorn and get comfortable or just take a look at what interests you.

So without further ado, let’s get started!

Deleted Artbook Content

One of the most exciting leaks we got were definitely these sample artbook excerpts. None of these pages made it into the final artbook, though.

This piece definitely belongs in Iduna and Agnarr’s backstory, in which the Northuldra leader wasn’t an ordinary man but a shapeshifter.

The biggest picture in this page points to yet another version of Iduna and Agnarr’s backstory. It’s possible to deduce Bruni hadn’t been fully developed yet or created at all since the fire isn’t pink.

The one on the bottom right seems to be an earlier version of the “forest freed” scene in the final movie, or maybe it happened in another moment altogether.

The most interesting of the three, though, is this one. Nothing in the movie points to the existence of a place like this. It’s interesting to note that this peculiar house looks very similar to Iceland’s “elf houses”, tied to the myth of the Huldufólk, “hidden people”, who were said to be small and live in a parallel world, being able to make themselves visible at will.

These are definitely the inhabitants of the Enchanted Lands, who look completely different than in the final movie with their long cloaks, hoods and staves. They look like mages. Were these the very first concepts of the Northuldra, or another group of characters altogether that ended up being scrapped? Only Ahtohallan knows...

Even though the tree and the vegetation illustration is in the book, there’s one missing and that one is the bottom left. One of the most popular theories in the fandom regarding that illustration is that it was an Arendellian military camp tied to the expedition to the Enchanted Lands. I think what we got in the movie is a watered down version of a much more violent and sinister endeavor to invade the Northuldra. The above mentioned deleted scene of the battle of Arendellians agains Northuldrans is proof of that.

This one shows the Arendellian gang and most likely Mattias looking at the walls of a cave with drawings on it depicting the Nokk among other things that I can’t quite make out. I’ve heard people say that an earlier version of F2 involved the gang encountering Mattias in a volcanic cave and that’s where this scene would go, but I don’t know if those are rumors or there’s an actual source. If someone happens to have knowledge on this topic in particular please let me know and I’ll update the post.

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Incomplete Frozen Fan Fest books and their alternate scenes

As I’ve mentioned in another post, Frozen Fan Fest happened on October 4th, 2019, and it was the official release of the movie’s first merchandise. We were all super excited to look at the storybooks and read the ending!

Except there was no ending and the books ended abruptly right before Olaf’s death, completely skipping over Show Yourself.

You hear that? “Elsa bravely dives into the Dark Sea”. We know the Dark Sea scene was shortened and that’s more proof.

This section of a Frozen 2 storybook explains how it went a bit better. After Elsa was defeated twice by the ferocious waves she climbed up some giant rocks and dove back in. Only Ahtohallan knows how that would be effective in this situation and not a waste of strength, but hey, I’m sure it looked super cool and I’d be down to see it.

”Elsa trudged through terrible winds and thick snow”... um... she didn’t? This might’ve been created when Show Yourself wasn’t a thing yet and her path through Ahtohallan was just that, trudging through terrible winds and snow, and not an inspiring song about self-love and finding yourself. I wonder how that scene would’ve looked.

Maybe we can find something relating to that “unused” section of Ahtohallan in a book called “Anna, Elsa and the Secret River”. Basically Iduna tells them that there’s a secret river out there and after the lullaby Elsa and Anna go nuts and try to look for the river outside. Seems like it was all a shared acid trip because next morning they seriously consider it was a dream.

Maybe here they didn’t realize they were in front of a river, because “Glaciers are rivers of ice” and this is what that Ahtohallan Elsa ventured into originally would’ve looked like? The white river doesn’t know...

This is by far one of my favorite ones. I wouldn’t exactly describe post-Show Yourself as a moment of calm and peace. Maybe peace but definitely not calm. Then it says that the signal meant that “she managed to cross the sea”. That’s a really weird way to describe “horrifying ice statue of colonialist grandpa killing an innocent native man”. I don’t know if they’re hiding the actual plot here of if they hadn’t yet worked out all the details of SY and the moment Elsa found the truth.

Anna has her cloak on as she finds the truth. Readers have no idea what this enlightening truth is because the ice statue is indistinguishable.

As it shows here, the original Iduna being Northuldra reveal was going to happen in a different way. I’m glad we got that final version... Because wow, Elsa and Anna are completely unable to connect the dots here. Anna was smart enough to figure out what to do after receiving Elsa’s message, c’mon! This should’ve been piece of cake...

 Iduna called Elsa “Little Snow”. This points to an alternate All is Found scene and we’ll talk about that more in depth later.

Same scene. Translation is: 

“While tucking the little princesses in, Queen Iduna sang them a lullaby about a far-away river called Ahtohallan, which holds all the answers about the past.

“Does Ahtohallan know why I have powers?” asked Elsa her mother.

“If it exists, it definitely knows that and much more,” answered the Queen.

So in this earlier version, Elsa has always asked herself if Ahtohallan had the answer to her powers... Doesn’t this make Show Yourself work even better? Here she always looked for that answer and she’d learn that she is the answer. I wonder why they took it out because it makes a lot of sense and would give buildup to Show Yourself.

Here what really matters are the squares with text. Olaf never ran through moss or became covered in it. Olaf never looks down a brook to be met by Nokk’s gaze from below. Maybe it’s an alternate When I’m Older?

And relating to that particular piece of merch:

Seems like in an earlier version, the Nokk was associated with waterfalls.

Everyone shut up there’s SWORD ANNA here. Found in a coloring book. I don’t speak Italian but Google Translate says: 

“Anna is a brave one: she does not hesitate to draw her sword to defend her sister Elsa and her friends from any new threat.”

GOOD FOR HER! This is definitely from the version we were shown in the teaser, when Anna wielding an actual sword and slicing someone with it was still a thing. Man, how I wanted that to happen...

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Alternate fully animated scenes found in animators’ posts

After the release of Frozen 2, animators started to post scenes they had worked on and showing the process behind them. Some of them were deleted, are different in the final movie, or have a completely different score accompanying them.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Adam Green (@agreenster) on Apr 6, 2020 at 5:31pm PDT

A completely different dialogue during the boat scene. Pretty heartbreaking and it’s even more buildup for TNRT, when Anna was left by literally everyone she loved in the planet.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Trent Correy (@trentanimation) on Apr 14, 2020 at 8:50am PDT

Apparently, for whatever reason, Gale was going to appear in the castle first.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Trent Correy (@trentanimation) on Mar 29, 2020 at 10:51am PDT

Olaf’s revival was going to be way different, and this implies that his death might’ve been different, too. Maybe his snow just dissipated and didn’t go anywhere? Maybe instead of being neatly placed by a waterfall, it fell all over the Enchanted Lands? I have no idea.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Mariusz Furmanczyk (@mariofurmanczyk) on Mar 21, 2020 at 7:11pm PDT

I absolutely LOVE this one, okay, and I have no idea why they’d leave it out. Turn your sound on and listen to the much more tragic alternate score. But more importantly, pay attention when she turns to solid ice: just like in F1 with Anna, her last breath is visible. Beautiful parallels, poetic cinema, and I’m hurt and confused and I want it in the movie. Excuse me while I call the police.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Mariusz Furmanczyk (@mariofurmanczyk) on Feb 26, 2020 at 5:47pm PST

Here the only change is the different score as she unfreezes. I love it so much. It’s so tragic, heavy and powerful. You can basically hear the fragility of Elsa’s fate as the ice breaks and she falls. Help. Here, here, and here, you can see other glimpses of this beautiful alternate score. Once again I’m calling the police and telling them Disney hurt my feelings by leaving this out.

I’ve hit the 5 videos limit already, but here is a link to an animation by jdublish. The change isn’t the scene itself but the completely different siren call Elsa hears. Much more ominous and creepy and I also love it, even though I have to admit the final siren call sounds catchier and more iconic. Also, kids under five won’t start crying of fear when they hear it.

Then there were also plenty of changes in the Elsa vs Nokk scene and we got to see one. Thanks to @justlookatthosesausages for pointing this out and letting me use her gif! The original video was set to private for some reason so I can’t post a Youtube link, but this is @justlookatthosesausages‘ gif:

Elsa struggled way more in the original version. Go to her post to see a comparison with the final version.

And now the awaited All is Found alternate scene! Thanks a lot to @lovewillthaw-j who helped me collect all the scenes. 

First two scenes from the trailers: the Official one, Elsa looks up and Iduna gazes at the northern lights.

The Japanese one, in which Iduna kisses Elsa’s hands. @catloafs pointed that out after F2′s release so thanks!

And the last two were found by @antoineharrakblog, so thanks for that! Here and here.

BUT there’s no need to click a bazillion links because @lovewillthaw-j‘s post reconstructs in a single video what the original scene would’ve been like. Go watch it!

UPDATE: Additions by @antoineharrakblog​. Thanks a lot!

Here we can see that originally, as the elements fled and Kristoff held Olaf, he yelled, “Wow, you’re heavy!”. Don’t know why this would be removed. Maybe they wanted to keep the scene serious? Maybe they needed to shorten the movie so that it didn’t exceed 100 minutes and cut little jokes like that?

 And here, showing Elsa seeing how Iduna saved her father, there’s some deleted dialogue: “Get the prince out of here!” “King Runeard, what did you decide?” in addition to a much more tense score in general.

_________________________

UPDATE: Screencaps of deleted/alternate scenes

Thanks a lot to @antoineharrakblog for bringing all of these pictures to my attention! Multiples screencaps have appeared in different magazines or books that clearly didn’t make it to the movie.

Anna never makes that movement in the final movie. There’s more proof of an alternate/extended “Elsa and Anna talk” scene.

This is another one. There exists a lower quality version of this picture which I can’t find right now, but it shows that Anna and Elsa are sharing kransekake in this particular scene (the particular food that we can see at the beginning of OFA).

These are all part of the All is Found scene we’ve been talking about. In the final movie we can see that All is Found serves as a sort of “bridge” between the past and the present, as it transitions from Iduna singing the song to Elsa to Elsa in the castle, reminiscing. But originally, Iduna finished singing All is Found in the past. There’s proof of this here. 

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UPDATE: Novelization deleted content

This information was provided by @theupsidedownpyramid​ so thanks a lot! There are some really interesting deleted scenes in the novelization.

In this one, Elsa felt the urge to release her magic after hearing the voice at the end of All is Found.

In the novelization Mattias and Yelena’s (or Yelana? Disney will never decide) relationship was a lot deeper than what was shown in the movie.

For more information and a more thorough analysis, read @theupsidedownpyramid​‘s reblog!

_________________________

Miscellaneous

So there’s only one image in this section but believe me, it’s so worth it. 

An animator casually mentioned that there was going to be a head kiss scene. Process it. Can’t? I can’t either.

_________________________

Wow I’m TIRED. I must’ve missed something but that’s all my brain can handle as of now. Thank quarantine for giving me the opportunity to work on this post all day.

Disney committed war crimes when they deleted some of these scenes. I have only one question: Why in the world would they do that? And more information might see the light of day in the future. I’ll never get tired of trying to piece together the convoluted puzzle that is the original Frozen 2.

I will update this post if I remember something else or if someone else has more content to share. Let’s reconstruct F2 together to visualize that movie Disney deemed too cool for us!

UPDATE: Into the Unknown: the Making of Frozen 2 Documentary finally has a concrete release date, June 26th. Let’s hope we can see more stuff then!

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #368

“whatever doesn’t kill you, is gonna leave a scar”

Have you ever bought a YouTuber’s merch? My favorite shirt is the Day of the Dead design by Cloak, which is Markiplier's and jacksepticeye's clothing brand. Mom's friend/former co-worker also got me a Ninja Sex Party shirt because she knew I liked them. There are SO MANY YouTubers I wanna support by buying shirts. Do you think oatmeal tastes better when made with water or milk? Milk, 110%. Have you ever left a note in a library book? No. What time of day do you prefer to wash your hair? Morning. Has anyone ever spread lies about you? Yes. Have you ever taken a photograph with a celebrity? If so, did it turn out the way you wanted, or do you wish you could retake it? No. If you could move out of your home country permanently, would you? If so, where would you go? If it didn't mean being so very far from my family, I would love to move to Canada. Is there a celebrity that everyone else seems to love, but you find totally overrated? Why is it that you don’t like them? I legit don't know who's considered currently popular, and I especially don't know who they are as people. If you could volunteer for any charity, which one would you choose? Do you think it’s more important to help humans, or are animal and environmental charities equally important? Something relating to animals, and I think they're both equally important. Do you prefer holidays where you relax, or actually do things? I like a mix. Something chill, but you still do some stuff as a family. Do you think that after we die our spirit is still alive? Yes. Has anybody ever told you that you could be a model? Someone has mistaken me for a model in a picture I once took. It was one of the most flattering things I've ever heard, haha. Do you use different kinds of moisturizer for different body parts? ie. hand lotion for your hands, face cream for your face. Or do you just use one moisturizer for all body parts? Yes. Have you ever felt like you were someone’s rebound? No. Has anybody ever broken up with you over something really pathetic? What was it? Have you ever been dumped in a disrespectful way? (eg. through text, through a friend..) I have 100% been dumped in a very cowardly and disrespectful way; after dating Jason for nearly four years and being very serious, he broke up with me very abruptly over Facebook Messenger. His reason was valid, but at the same time, he NEVER talked to me about it. Apparently my depression was dragging him down. If he'd fucking communicated it, I would have explored new treatment options so goddamn fast. But no, he decided to snap his fingers and disappear. That's exactly WHY it was so traumatic, I think: it was so unexpected and sudden. Did you have a lot of role models as a kid? Animal enthusiasts like Steve Irwin and Jeff Corwin for sure. Do you feel like anyone looks up to you? Why or why not? God no. I'm just... not someone to aspire to be like. What was the last thing you found offensive? I'm not sure. Who is the nicest person you know? My mom. Do you feel safe in your country? I feel safe in NC, rather. Like I don't expect an atom bomb or terrorist attack or something in this obscure area. In the U.S.A. itself, sometimes I do, sometimes I don't. America is definitely not loved by every other country. Do you feel safe where you live? Not in this city, no. Have you been falsely diagnosed with something by a bad doctor? Yup. Did y'all know I apparently have ADHD? I know, shocking. Have you ever had a doctor refuse to treat you? No. Name the strangest game you’ve ever played (video game or real game): The first Silent Hill, probably. It took a lot of reading to get it. Do you know anyone who has been struck by lightning before? No. Which cartoon character would you want to keep as a pet? Does Stitch count? Or a Pokemon. Do you like marshmallows? Yes. What is your favorite flavor of candy cane? I really like the Jolly Rancher candy canes, I think they are? Have you ever fostered an animal? No. Do you still take hot showers when it’s hot out? Not as hot, but not cold except on very extreme occasions. When writing $ sign, do you draw one line through the S or two? Two. What animal have you always wanted as a pet but couldn’t have? I'm thankful that my parents were pretty open-minded to what pets I really wanted, but one I was never allowed to have was a ferret because of how messy and smelly they are. List three people you’ve had crushes on: Jason, Sara, and Sebastian were probably my biggest crushes. Have you ever thrown up from cramps? No, but god have I felt close. List three people you had a hard time forgiving. Jason, Colleen, and my dad. Who is the most spiritual person you know? Probably my sister's mother-in-law. Would you ever start a vlog? God no, I'd bore people to tears. Are your dreams coming true yet? I mean, I guess in some ways with my mental health. In my deepest depression, what I have now was a dream, even though current me is very discontent with it. Most of my dreams, though? No. Do you struggle with depression? I've been diagnosed with severe depression since 7th grade. Are you haunted by your past? A few things won't leave me alone. What medical conditions do you have? Just a lot. There are even more that are up for debate. I've talked about my diagnosed conditions enough. Do you use a Magic Bullet? No. What does your apron look like? I don’t have one. What are your favorite spicy foods? Hot Cheetos, Takis, hot wings, jalapeno pizza... Man, I love spicy food. Which do you like better: being an adult or being a kid? Being a kid. Were you excited to be a teenager on your thirteenth birthday? I had very mixed feelings. Did you feel insecure in high school? Shit, I still do. Would you ever be friends with someone who was suicidal? What the FUCK is this question? No fucking shit I would be. Someone being suicidal in no way affects who they are as a person. Who was the biggest bully in high school? I don't think there really was one. What was your favorite class in high school? Art. Would you rather have a daughter or a son? If I wanted kids, a daughter. Have you ever written to an advice columnist? No. Have you ever had a doctor not believe what you told him? Maybe? I did however have an employee at the ER the first time I went try to pry out of me that my self-mutilation was for attention, and it wasn't until I insisted about a dozen times that it wasn't that he believed me. It's odd looking back that I got REALLY attached to him during that stay, knowing now that it was absolutely horrible and extremely unhelpful for him to do that. If you’re female, would you feel uncomfortable having a male gynecologist? I would absolutely refuse to have a male one. Do you like Lisa Frank? Yeah, like can you talk about aesthetic. What gives you nightmares? Boy, I wish I could tell you, given how much I have them. Were you ever hospitalized as a child? No. Did you get senior pictures taken? No. What color is your bicycle? I don’t have one. Did you ever have to take home a fake baby in health class? No, thank fuck. Would you rather wear ivory or white on your wedding day? What color will your bridesmaids wear? I'd rather wear black. I think red will be the bridesmaids' color. Would you rather have a swimming pool or trampoline? I want a swimming pool so damn badly so I could exercise my legs without worrying about sweating, and I can stop and rest whenever I want, unlike going walking or something. I don't think my knees could handle a trampoline. Do you think babies are cute? Some, sure. But a lot, not really. Do you dream about the future a lot? Yeah. Do you think about your past a lot? Way too frequently. How good are you at living in the moment? I'm trying to get better at it. Have you ever questioned God’s existence? Yeah. Vanilla frosting or chocolate? Chocolate. What’s your favorite foreign cuisine? I've actually been exploring Italian pasta lately. I'm not a big fan of foreign food that I've tried, though. Have you ever moved to another state? No. Did you do anything productive today? No. .-. Can you say the alphabet backwards? No, actually. Do you like flowers? Of course; does anyone not? Have you ever thought you were gonna die? I didn't care if I did or didn't. What kind of mood are you in today? I was honestly really depressed through most of it. Just health stuff was really getting to me. I just woke up from what was honestly like a four-hour nap and I feel all right, I guess. What are you craving right now? I REALLY want Domino's jalapeno pizza. Is there anyone you would seriously punch right now if you had the chance? No. What is worse, physical or emotional pain? Definitely emotional. Have you ever walked in on somebody doing something… questionable? When Dad still lived with us, I think he might have been watching... you know... on TV when I came into my parents' room for something. Idk for sure though. I didn't ask, and I don't want to know. If you were to make videos on YouTube, what would they be of? Oh god, idk. I don't want to make any. What I'd have most fun with would be reptile education, but I 1.) have literally one snake, 2.) am not extremely educated on a good number of them and don't want to be misleading, and 3.) I would run outta content fast. So, leave it to Snake Discovery, haha. Posting pictures of yourself in a bathing suit on the internet - ok or not? Yes, it's okay????? If you're talking about me personally though, you won't see me dead in a bathing suit picture. Do you typically laugh when somebody falls down? No, I gasp and see if they're okay. What is the most disturbing movie you’ve ever watched? Paranormal Entity. The ending is... a lot. Your opinion of Katy Perry, please? I like a couple of her songs. If you could say anything to your Mom right now… what would it be? "Thank you for absolutely everything."

[literaila]

well. sometimes we do journalist stuff and talk, and others we take photos. so far i’ve taken photos of flowers, a coca cola can, and a mcdonald’s cup. i found all these in school, outside. i remember back in 3rd grade, whenever it was a special occasion or something, i drew my teachers cards. and it would take hours of complaining and whining.

i bet i could come up with loads of ideas. but it’s actually writing that’s difficult. i do wonder- how do you come up with titles? that sounds hard. writing in general just seems.. i dunno, challenging? you’re an amazing writer, though.

yep! can’t believe i forgot to tell you. do you have any specific jewelry?

why can’t you keep them all? oohhh! yeah, i’ve been to one. twice, actually. with my brother and sister. just made me love cats more.

it definitely suits you. you just give off green vibes. in a good way, of course. do you have any merch of anything else? oh, i remember when everybody did those. you actually painted it yourself?

also, i can’t remember if i’ve asked, but do you watch anime?

another also. what language do you speak? i mean, is english your first language? my family’s all from the iraq, and i was born in dubai or the emirates, i guess. arabic but broken- since i grew up here mostly. can’t remember if either of us have mentioned this before :/

yeah, i really liked it. loved it, actually. i mean, the idea’s so unique and interesting. i finished the abundance of katherine’s and got scythe. i’m on page 38 or something. i accidentally spoiled it for myself. but still, not fully- i don’t think? have you read book thief yet? most of my favorites are ones you’ve already read, so. but i’ll let you know when i finish and start any book. because why not. i might love books but i don’t actually read that consistently- i barely have any motivation and it’s annoying. i skipped my 100 pages yesterday. i’ll read today. by emily henry? i’ll add both of them to the list. did you like them?

somehow. it’s seriously like i don’t know how to keep up a conversation. i’m not like this with the other teachers. probably because she’s scary. yeah, that’s it. i don’t know?? i’ve never even heard of mamma mia.

then yeah, i’d prefer dm’s. so i don’t take a day and a half to respond. sorry about that, also. i guess i can come off anon?

i don’t know who wouldn’t compliment you. they’d be blind not to. you worked today, right? no, it was yesterday. how was it?

friday went okay. obviously, cares club was cancelled. because my english teacher was absent, and so was the coach that also teaches it. did practically nothing. had a nightmare today. was weird?? i dunno. and i just rewatched mean girls for the millionth time. going to read and then have ramen for dinner. that’s about it.

how’s your day been, my love? everything okay?

— 🐢

that’s cool! do you learn about different photography aspects? i’ve always wanted to know about that… which picture is your favorite? ah yes, hours of torture, but then you get something out of it. just like anything, i guess.

oh yes, the world is full of things to write about. titles? i don’t know, i find them easy. at least, for my fics. i usually build my stories around an “idea” (or a metaphor depending on how poetic i’m feeling) and that usually ends up being the title. you’ll see my titles get longer and longer. it is challenging, for anyone. i’m not really one for explanations so i have to work around that.

mmm just rings. i have a chat noir ring.

technically murphy and pepper are my grandparent’s pets. you should go again! i’ve always wanted to go.

i used to have a twilight poster before we moved. uhh i have a loki sweatshirt. no other big things though. ha, nope. my friend made it for my birthday a couple years ago.

i don’t watch anime. mostly just.. read about it? it’s very popular on social media.

wow! that’s a ways away. your family speaks—some?—arabic too, then? i know that for lots of people languages are easier to understand than to speak. english is my first, and my only fluent. i speak some american sign language, but otherwise i just know some basics. i have a really hard time picking things up and as people grow older it’s harder to learn a new language. i’m jealous of those who can do it easily..

pssh, even if you think you’ve spoiled a book for yourself, you really haven’t. my copy is in a box now so… haven’t read the book thief. i’ve heard great reviews of it but i just have a feeling i won’t like it so i’m hesitant to pick it up.. yep, emily henry. i cry every time i read “beach read” so. yes. they both just make me laugh. i just got another book in the mail today. i’ll read it tonight, probably .

it’s a lot more difficult to talk to people you like. or, it is for me. you should watch it—not my favorite but definitely popular.

whenever you want.

well thank you, darling. that’s very kind. i did work yesterday—we were “really” short staffed so i got the “hardest” section. it was fine though, i’m pretty good at my job (not to boast or anything but i’ve been there a while). also i’m a people pleaser, so, you can imagine how that goes hand in hand with costumer service. (and i was really tired last night, literally fell asleep eating dinner)

practically nothing doesn’t sound too bad. at least it’s friday. i’m sorry. was it a bad nightmare? ah, i was listening to mean girls—the musical—earlier so that fits. nice night. don’t stay up too late.

ah, went furniture shopping again. actually bought stuff this time. and then my mom and i went home to put it together and we’ll go back tomorrow. i’m restless right now. don’t do well with unfinished things. everything’s okay.

-v

[yhtaejoon]

hi! this is chey, i was here close to opening with kim1 (kim joonwoo), but i got really busy with a new job and accidentally dipped. i’m so so sorry for that! anyway, here’s taejoon’s unfinished info page & his pinterest board. this is rushed so it’s probably gonna be messy??? idk. we’re all in this together. hmu on discord if that’s your thing --- pepper#4940

full name is kang taejoon, but he has no affiliation with the kang family. he’s actually filling the role of daebak8! i checked the last names to make sure he didn’t have the same one as one of the families but alas, my pea-brain still failed me.

on that note, he’s a tiktoker born in 2000. started on vine in 2012, but didn’t actually get serious about his online presence until 2014-ish and IMMEDIATELY started lying about his life because what else is a fourteen year old gonna do online?

lied about his age, his hobbies, his family, his experiences, etc. he just really, really wanted to seem interesting, and hey! it worked! he eventually fooled thousands of people into thinking he’s someone worth their time. chased trends like crazy, kept in close touch with his “fanbase”, picked up sponsorships all while keeping his ACTUAL life completely secret basically. got very comfortable with lying.

he was always pretty obsessed with the attention because he lost his popularity when he stopped playing soccer (f’s in the chat for the former athlete side of him) & getting money from promoting brands was good, too, bc while his family isn’t necessarily lower class, they could still use some help. plus he needed cash to buy anime merch.

flash forward to 2020. he graduated high school in early 2019, still has no desire to go to college or get a “real” job. he has it made rn living in the daebak house and creating online content still. living the life.

except not really because how fulfilling can it honestly be to watch thousands of people becoming fond of ur fake persona? he still lies a ton, has begun to feel like no one will ever like him for who he actually is bc it’s quite disappointing in comparison to the always ON persona he shows. 

his tiktok user name is “beetlejoon” which is a play on beetlejuice if you couldn’t tell dshbfvds.

he speaks english really well from a mix of classes when he was young, growing up online and trying to appeal to westerners, and watching a ton of western shows/films. he does kind of have an accent but for the most part.... a lot of ppl who only know him online assume he lives in america/is from america.

the rumor about him buying views/followers is definitely true. he’s not losing popularity or anything, he just wants to look even more relevant than he actually is.

cries himself to sleep like every night but you’d NEVER guess. he’s super funny when he’s around people, knows what people want and will do anything he can to blend in and make everyone like him. needs that validation so bad. life of the party.

flirts a lot for no other reason than he can and he likes the validation of people flirting back! but his love life is hectic and always disappointing. on one hand, he knows a ton of his followers are delusional w the idea that they can be with him and he doesn’t wanna lose followers by being Unavailable. on the other hand, can’t risk being too close with anyone and them finding out nothing he says is true. heehee.

he follows whatever trends are in at the moment, so he owns a ton of dumb shit that will never be practical/clothes he’ll never wear in public/probably has dumb tattoos he got impulsively.

his trademark thing (that he stole Obviously) is a broken heart that he draws on his cheekbone Every Single Day. probably claims that it’s a tattoo just to fuck with his followers but there’s those odd times when it’s not there and everyone’s confused.

wears all black usually, lots of chains, leather, platform boots, dangly earrings, but he’s not the kind of guy your parents worn you about. he couldn’t be scary if he tried. he’s CLEARLY just a tiktok e-boy. he’s more like the lowlife your parents compare you to to make you feel better about how slow your life is moving.

while we’re talking about parents.... his gave up on him when he moved into the daebak house. he tries to give them money and support them but they won’t have it. decline his calls. don’t write him back. they think he’s mad embarrassing which is... fair. his tiktok presence is definitely questionable

likes to be funny and make people laugh, but he actually cannot take anything seriously even if he tries. this definitely gets on peoples’ nerves, has probably ended some good friendships/relationships/whatever else. sometimes he can lighten the mood if it’s dark but most of the time it just pisses people off bc it seems like he doesn’t care/doesn’t understand.

idk what else to say but if you’ve read this far and you like music, two songs that i heavily associate with taejoon are cotton candy by yungblud and lowkey as hell by waterparks. listen to them if you want... or don’t.

i don’t have a plots page put together yet, but here are some vague ideas i have:

(0/2) --- past tinder dates whom he lied to about his age and it came out somehow </3 maybe he tried to take them to a bar and he got caught with a fake id. maybe they went snooping and found out none of his info adds up. either way, the dates were short-lived and they probably clowned him pretty hard.

(0/?) --- fans of his tiktok page.

(0/?) --- alternatively, people who know of his tiktok page and think it’s dumb.

(0/1) --- another influencer who is jealous of his following, thinks he doesn’t deserve it.

(0/1) --- another influencer who “beefs” with him online so they both get more views.

(0/1) --- another influencer he collabs with a lot, even if their content is completely different. they’re friends, so might as well piggyback of each other’s popularity!

(0/1) --- close friend who makes frequent appearances on his tiktok, usually for relationship trends bc he doesn’t have an actual partner to film them with. usually acting like clowns, clearly faking but his fans still think it might be real. 

(0/1) --- someone he hooked up with at one (or more) of the daebaek house parties and ghosted afterwards. completely acts like he doesn’t know them. oops.

(0/?) --- friends to do dumb shit with. he’s impulsive and just hates to be alone (especially when doing stuff that might get him in trouble) so you could say these are his accomplices. if he wants to do things he’ll regret, they’re always in!

(0/?) --- some mellow friends who balance out his chaos.

(0/1) --- the one (1) friend he got matching tattoos with on impulse. probably something really stupid. the one thread that holds their friendship together when they fight.

(0/1) --- someone who holds themselves to really high standards, takes life seriously. thinks they’re better than taejoon and doesn’t hesitate to show it.

(0/1) --- ex partner who broke up with taejoon because (1) he wouldn’t stop lying to them, (2) he still claimed to be single online and (3) he just cracked jokes when they tried to talk out their problems, wouldn’t really listen. probably hate him now but he’s really sorry. please accept these (cheap, probably wilting) apology flowers.

i want every plot. all of them. anything u can throw at me! but if i kept typing ideas out, i’d be at this forever and we really can’t have that. so just hit me up if any of these catch your attention or if you’ve got anything you think he’d fit! 

[jlf23tumble]

Top 10 Niche Interests

Fixations? Obsessions? This is incredibly hard because I have wayyyy too many niche interests, so instead of stressing about it, I tried to channel the 10 things that immediately speak to me and maybe aren't so obvious from what I post here, like how much I'm obsessed with wigs, doll furniture, incredibly specific blogs, all forms of clothing with pockets, swimming pools, whimsical bus stops, over-the-top bathrooms, etc. etc Instead, I opted for some specifics that feel a little more evergreen and long tailed, like, so LIFE-long tailed that it's tough to nail down when or how they became part of the national psyche. I thank @alienfuckeronmain​ for the initial tag, and I'm tagging her AGAIN for round two because I know she has a billion additional niche things, and she'll post them, and I'll scream because it'll trigger five other things I neglected to post here, and I'll probably post my own round two, arggggh, insert aggressive sighing. Anyway, I tag ANYONE who wants to do it, just tag me so I can see! 

1. Indoor Trees

I have no idea why this concept PULLS so hard because houseplants are kind of meh to me, but you want to plant an entire-ass TREE indoors, in the place where you live? Me, too, and I'd add a conversation pit plus a combo gold/red bathroom, among other things, and, bam, we're in my imaginary dream home, which I have literally, constantly ALWAYS mentally constructed from the time I was about six or so. (If you're curious, it has multiple themed rooms, and the closest I've seen to it recently is the outstanding Dita von Teese AD feature, but Amy Sedaris’s apartment comes close, too). There are two (2) 1960s houses in Long Beach with magnificent indoor trees, but I can't find them online, so have this modern interpretation and cry with me about how I can't visit the multi-story fake tree inside Clifton's Cafeteria for a good long while:

2. Conventions of Fans of Any Kind

One thing that I don't think I'll ever lose is how much I *love* people who are fans of SOMETHING, people who have a passion and create something about it or cosplay it or simply gather to celebrate it and connect to other people through it. The Internet provides in all kinds of ways, but I'm talking specifically about IRL conventions and the way my heart pitter pats when I first walk in those doors, SWOON! And it doesn’t matter how big the convention is or how random, I've been to smaller events like CatCon and the My Little Pony convention all the way up to biggies like WonderCon and Comic Con, and I have yet to be disappointed. I might know jack shit about what I'm walking into, but I want to see the merch, hear about the panels, and check out the people who are fucking PUMPED to be there. Sadly, I think it's gonna be a lonnnnng time until these come back, but I can live vicariously through my old photos, sigh:

3. Dutch Wax Fabrics and African Fashion

I'm not the snazziest of dressers, but textiles, colors, and patterns have been an obsession that has soothed my visual soul for as long as I can literally remember. Wax fabric marries all three of those touchpoints, plus throws in a healthy dose of style, and I count myself lucky to have seen two big exhibits on the subject (this was one of them), oh, how I wish there were more! For sure, there's a fucked up underlying colonial/imperialist history here, but there's also humor and color and vibrancy, a reclamation of sorts, and multiple levels of fashion that take my breath away. I cannot do the different patterns justice at all, but the fan motif is one of my faves:

4. Hearst Castle vs. Madonna inn

These two fall into my #home tag because they're where I'm from, and they speak to me as equally sublime and ridiculous, camp and kitsch writ large and small, different (yet similar!) versions of Xanadu that two rich white men built as shrines to their own personal "taste." And the irony is that a lot of people shit on Alex Madonna for being tacky (the Madonna Inn is...uh, something else), yet praise WR Hearst for all the high-class art and architecture, most of which is fully lifted from desperate churches between and after world and yet they're both more or less the same concept (lodging for weary travelers, self-aggrandizement, questionable taste-mixing). Hearst Castle edges out slightly for me because it's bigger and has spectacular scenery and history, plus it gives me doses of LA noir thanks to the way Hearst killed a guy in a jealous Charlie Chaplin-related rage and Hedda Hopper covered it up, all kinds of old Hollywood shenanigans happened up there, etc. But I'm low-key an expert on both houses of the holy, I'm OBSESSED with both, and we can leave it at that. I mean, come on:

5. Snow Globes

I had to cull my personal collection slightly just to fit it all on the dedicated shelf in my bathroom, and I seriously need to refill all the water lines, but nothing beats a snow globe in terms of memorable souvenir, especially when you put it in a bathroom. The majesty!!! The jewel of my collection is the one from Sherwood Forest because WHY NOT celebrate a historic place and moment in the basic way?? He robbed from the rich to give to the poor, and the gift shop about 100 feet from the tree he hid in does the same! The circle of life! The irony of all the watermarks on this blessed image...protect:

6. Highly Specific Museums

Look, we can all agree that the more venerated museums in the world are a form of garbage in terms of what they represent, what they've done, and who runs them, but I'm here for the museums that collect and celebrate things that tend to get overlooked. There are too many to list that I love that are still thriving, so I'm going to say goodbye to four recently departed faves. RIP to the Pez museum, I'm so glad I saw you and purchased your stale candy souvenirs. RIP to the museum of terrible food, you were a pop up when Phoenix and I saw you, and I will forever think about the worker describing people literally vomiting during their visits. RIP to the currywurst museum in Berlin, I've had currywurst exactly once and it was not for me, but I respect the Journey you took me on, including obscure east German TV shows that helped make you so popular (??). Finally, RIP to the velvet painting museum, there's no way to mince words, the person who owned you was crazy AS FUCK and had zero clue how to run a business, but I'm so glad I saw you multiple times and purchased my own velvet treasure (not this exact one, but remarkably similar):

7. Liminal Spaces: Grocery Store Edition

Confession time for those who don't know me all that well, I'm a big time voyeur, and nothing fills my heart with joy like a walk at 7 or 8 pm, the witching hour when people haven't pulled the curtains, and I can scope out their decorations/furnishings without it being "weird." Another confession is how much I unabashedly adore grocery stores in other countries and will spend at least an hour wandering aisle by aisle, falling in love with how much everything is different yet completely the same:

8. Agatha Christie Novels:

As a child, I was a fairly compliant reader--I had to read something for school? Okay! For my mom? Sounds good! But the books that sparked the initial fire for me to read something purely for myself were second-hand (probably fourth- or fifth-hand, judging by cover art) Agatha Christie short story anthologies, which were the gateway drug to full Agatha Christie novels, then other mystery novels, and so on. But getting back to Agatha, I obviously loved all the stories, but every decade spawned incredibly good cover art (like, exceptionally good), and this particular artist's are right up near the top for me (I go back and forth on a lot of the '50s and '60s ones):

9. Scopitones

I link my obsession with scopitones both to my love of music videos in general and a shop in Austin, TX, that sold DVD compilations of them in particular, but either way, they're underappreciated and kitschy all in one! Francoise Hardy and the rest of the ye-ye's are my forever girls for this medium, but seemingly every country cranked them out, both actual set videos and "live" performances? If you don't know what they are, scopitones were machines that played music videos in French cafes in the '60s (??), so it was sort of your proto-MTV way to see your faves sing and dance. Oh, Francoise...so moderne!!

10. Cover Songs

I have so much patience and love for cover songs of any stripe, the more genre-bending and/or surprising, the better! My only minor beef is the trend in slooooooooowing down songs to make a point, but even those ones have a special place in my heart if they're effective. Live Lounge feeds my hunger the best, but my meta fave for representing this concept is Pulp's Bad Cover Version, which was already lyrically INSPIRED, a song about bad cover versions in terms of relationships, but then they did a video that was a visual "bad" cover version, with actors lip synching over an audio "bad" cover version, and all of it just worked? The cover for the single is someone in the band as a boy, making his own bad cover version of a Bowie album cover, it's meta meta meta, and I love love love, here's the video, if you're curious. In the more sublime cover category, I'm absolutely addicted to all of Orville Peck's covers, I truly hope he officially releases them sometime soon, but I wholeheartedly support any artist who does it:

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 127: Sir Nighteye

Previously on BnHA: Aizawa announced that the freshman students would be permitted to take on internships. Deku asked All Might to introduce him to his former sidekick Sir Nighteye. At first All Might declined, but then he had a change of heart after seeing Deku’s determination. He ended up asking Mirio (who’s been interning with Nighteye for the past year) to introduce Deku for him. Mirio agreed because he is a pal, and come the weekend, Deku accompanied him to Nighteye’s office. Mirio warned Deku that Nighteye values humor very highly, and if Deku couldn’t make him laugh, he’d probably be sent home in vain. Deku greeted Nighteye and made the weirdest fucking face I’ve ever seen. Times like this, it’s hard to believe this is the same series that was hitting us with that intense character development a mere five chapters ago, not to mention straight up blowing people to splattery bits two chapters ago omg.

Today on BnHA: Nighteye chews Deku out for getting the wrinkles wrong on his All Might impression. Deku activates his Quirk of Being a Giant Nerd and informs Nighteye that actually, his impression is based on a specific incident in which All Might made a particularly weird face. His gatekeeping attempt foiled, Nighteye begrudgingly agrees to test Deku. He says he’ll give him three minutes to take Nighteye’s hanko stamp from his hands and use it to stamp his internship form. This is much more difficult than it sounds, since it turns out that Nighteye’s quirk, Foresight, lets him see into the fucking future. Since he can see all of Deku’s attacks before they happen, Deku quickly finds himself in a pickle. Nighteye says that Mirio should have inherited OFA, and that Deku isn’t worthy. Our little green boy takes some issue with this, seeing as he was acknowledged by All Might himself. He powers up again, determined to show Nighteye just how worthy he is.

(As always, all comments not marked with an ETA are my unspoiled reactions from my first readthrough of this chapter. I’ve read up through chapter 155 now, so any ETAs will reflect that.)

are you even a megane character if you don’t use your middle finger to flip people off when adjusting your glasses

although to be fair, he has the rest of his fingers all splayed out. clearly he is still undecided as to whether he actually likes Deku or not

fucking look at this title

“shit, we didn’t come up with a title for this one.” “well who’s it about?” “um, these four characters.” “okay just put all four of their full fucking names then”

so he’s towering over Deku, who fully believes that he’s about to die

he fucking loves it, Deku. YOU GOT GUTS, KID!!

wow he’s grabbing Deku’s face and saying All Might doesn’t have a wrinkle on his right side, unlike the face Deku is making

holy shit

nevermind he doesn’t love it

jesus christ. EVEN THE UNLICENSED MERCH, DEKU. FUCKING GET IT RIGHT!!

now Deku’s looking around Nighteye’s office while the man in question continues to aggressively jab his fingers all over his face

he’s jealous of all of Nighteye’s All Might swag

Nighteye says he is “quite displeased” and is telling Deku to leave

what in the

sure. who doesn’t. that’s when all the vinegar just. fuckin’ killed itself

holy shit

OH SNAP. HE FUCKING NAILED IT AFTER ALL

Deku says it’s one of his less popular incidents, but he really likes it

mainly because of All Might’s terrible dad jokes

holy shit I love All Might so fucking much

by the way can you imagine if a river just fucking turned into fucking vinegar all of a sudden. like, did the kid change it back afterward? how much of it was actually changed? someone else is walking along further downstream and they’re all like, “...do you smell something? ...did this river go bad?”

also there’s no suicide in this story. how misleading

now Nighteye’s getting offended and asking Deku if he’s testing him

but Deku says he just got a little hyped up remembering the story

Mirio and Bubble Girl are just watching like, “...”

Mirio’s impressed with how Deku turned the situation around even though he didn’t actually get Nighteye to laugh

so now Nighteye’s sitting down and looking as though he’s considering it

Deku’s all “PLEASE TAKE ME!!! HERE’S THE CONTRACT OMG”

but Nighteye hasn’t quite made up his mind yet whether or not to take him

Nighteye’s laying out all the details of the internship and how tough it is

the internship will last at least a month -- although it’s paid, hell yeah Deku, nice -- and Deku will need to take lots of time off from his lessons at U.A. and he’ll likely have trouble keeping up with his course workload and would risk falling behind his classmates

but Deku has made him his mind on this for sure. he’s not afraid of the extra work

aaaaaand Nighteye is stamping the contract

wait a sec

uh oh

(ETA: how could I have just skipped right over Deku’s reaction without commenting on it omg

fucking flawless comedic timing. who says this kid has no sense of humor)

lol Nighteye says he has no intention of stamping it

Deku, grab his arm real quick and just... he’s right there! you can do it. he’s so skinny. just overpower him

oh shit

what the fuck is wrong with his neck

also, so Mirio’s already considered a sidekick then? you go, Mirio

(ETA: actually, Mangastream has the correct translation here: “this office already gets along fine with two sidekicks and one student intern.” it’s just that at this point we hadn’t yet been introduced to Nighteye’s other horrifying sidekick)

he’s asking Deku what he has to contribute to society. if he wants his acknowledgement then Deku has to show him

of course there’s no need to sum up everything All Might himself had to contribute. nothing to see here, just a single man who transformed the entire world for the better and gave it hope. yep yep

anyway, so Nighteye is again asking him what advantages he can offer his agency. and he says he’d appreciate if he showed him with actions rather than words

well this is tricky. what does Deku have going for him. well his winning attitude and good heart and big hero brain of course. and also a little ol’ thing called One for All, but that part is of course a secret

oh my god

lmao are you serious. yes, exactly. GO FOR IT DEKU, STAMP THAT SHIT YOURSELF

he says he’s giving Deku a rare chance even though he doesn’t have the slightest shred of humor

“am I not merciful” jesus

now he’s telling Mirio and Bubble Girl to skedaddle

well, Deku managed to graze Gran Torino within three minutes his very first time using full cowl. and he’s the guy who trained All Might. Nighteye is just his fucking sidekick. DEKU YOU GOT THIS BRO

Bubble’s asking if Mirio had to pass a test like this when he first started

he says he didn’t, since Nighteye chose him personally. I guess U.A. must have given him the same pitch they gave All Might about how great Mirio is

in both the FA translation and the Mangastream translation, Bubble uses the word “jelly”, and for some irrational reason it’s really making me cringe

so jelly

(ETA: honestly though, Nighteye really does love Mirio. initially it’s framed as just Mirio being his protege and the one he believes is most deserving to inherit OFA, but over the course of the arc it becomes clear he cares about him much more deeply than that. actually, a good deal of Nighteye’s character development is just us gradually learning that he cares a fuckton more than he initially lets on. I have a lot of Nighteye feels. someone sent me an ask about him yesterday, so I’ll post that soon)

Mirio’s thinking to himself that it doesn’t look good for Deku, though

“against Sir’s quirk, accomplishing those conditions is virtually impossible”

well then Sir “All Might’s fucking sidekick” Nighteye, what the fuck is your quirk, then. consider me suitably hyped by this point

Nighteye says he won’t attack Deku, and he doesn’t care what Deku does, even if he damages the room

okay for real though, just how badass is this dude. what rank is he. is he the number three guy at long last? they’re sure making him out to be at that level

(ETA: are we going to get Nighteye’s actual hero ranking at any point? will they mention it in his fucking obituary maybe)

Deku’s powering up full cowl. I hope he went straight to 8%

he’s charging straight at him. Nighteye seems to think it’s a feint

yep he’s right

“you’ll follow with another attack” hoooooooly shit IS HE A PRECOG. IS THAT HIS QUIRK. FUCKING KATAKIRI OMG

although to be fair, literally any asshole could have told you Deku was going to follow up with another attack lmao. “nah, actually that’s it. one and done. I give up now”

imagine if this really is the number three hero. oh Kacchan, I heard you interned with number four, so naturally I went and convinced the number three guy to take me :)

(ETA: and yeah I’m aware that since All Might’s retired, all of the rankings have been bumped up, but I still think of them in terms of their previous rankings for some reason. anyways, you know what I mean)

not that Katsuki would have been able to tolerate this guy for more than thirty seconds

“I see everything.” yeah, I’m pretty sure. either that or he’s got 360 degree vision or some shit

but I really hope it’s precognition. I have a mental list of quirks we haven’t seen yet that I’m anticipating and this is one of them. (I also really want to see mind-reading and truth serum quirks. and an illusionist quirk, because I need one of these villains to play some damn mind games one of these days)

(ETA: WE GOT THE TRUTH SERUM QUIRK AND THEY TOTALLY WASTED IT. I’M SO MAD)

Deku’s thinking to try and beat Nighteye’s quirk by overwhelming him with a bunch of attacks

yesssssss!

(ETA: later on we learn that he can only use this quirk once every 24 hours. that’s a pretty big deal, because it means he took this decision so seriously that he decided to use it on Deku. if he’d ended up needing to use it for something else (say, something related to actual crime-fighting) later on he’d have been SOL.

also, Nighteye is a great example of the advantage a hero has when the details of their quirk aren’t widely publicized for the world to see. and he also proves that it’s more than possible to keep them under wraps even after years of hero work. just saying, U.A. maybe it’s not the most rational thing in the world to deprive your kids of that advantage right from the get go simply because you assume it’ll happen eventually)

so now Deku’s straining to figure out a way to get around his quirk

I would think speed alone would still be able to do it. if you’re fast enough it shouldn’t matter whether the opponent knows the punch is coming or not. but I expect Nighteye is likely faster than Deku though since Deku’s still inexperienced

is there any way to confuse him if someone has a lot of potential “courses of action” and all of them have a near-equal likelihood?

anyway let’s see what he actually does end up doing lol

Nighteye says he was wondering what kind of person Deku was, and that he had high expectations

but he says Deku is mediocre

wow

starting to get an inkling that the guy who can predict the future has gotten a little too used to being right all the time

you really think you know better than All Might on this one, huh. okay

also, exactly how many people know about One for All for real though?? the list just keeps expanding

so Deku’s really surprised. that’s right, he wasn’t aware Mirio had been the original candidate

Nighteye says he respects All Might, but they didn’t see eye to eye when it came to his successor

why do you think you should have had a say in it to begin with?

I guess All Might probably confided in a few people and asked for advice and recommendations though

oh dang

(ETA: All Might does a lot of not telling Deku things. he is the Obi-Wan of this series after all)

I don’t know if I’m ready for Deku to have a crisis of confidence so soon after Kacchan’s. I hope this doesn’t rattle him too much

he asked All Might back at the sports festival if he wanted someone else, and All Might told him in no uncertain terms he was the one, so. hope he remembers that

so Nighteye’s reminding him that the clock’s still ticking down while he’s just standing there thinking

he’s being a real asshole! :)

NOT ACCORDING TO THE GOAT ALL MIGHT THERE ISN’T

I mean, not to compare All Might to Lord Voldemort lol, but it’s kinda the same thing. having heard a prophecy that could have applied to two different children, Voldemort went with the child most similar to him, rather than the pureblood. All Might also had his choice of successors. Mirio is amazing and would have definitely been worthy. but in the end, All Might chose the boy who was born quirkless just like him. just because he started from further down doesn’t mean his ceiling is lower than anyone else’s, and in fact it may just be the highest of them all

oh good. Deku’s getting fired up

good Deku

“All Might... chose me!” yessssssssss omg. bring it!

“he’s not the kind of kid who’s so used to rejection anymore!” omfg. now they’re trying to get me fired up. and it’s working oh damn

 BONUS:

it is pretty sweet how he went out of his way to make sure she got a decent amount of screentime and not just some one-time background role

but like, he can’t pretend her costume design wasn’t 100% the reason he picked her, and tbh it kind of skeeves me out. anywayy

[pikapikaprecure]

Pikapika☆Precure Under The Big Top episode 3- Merchandise saves the day!? Return of Takura’s robots!

“Félicité Bow!“ Jubilee summoned her weapon, and fired her arrows, being careful not to get hit by anything. She stepped back, and held her weapon in the air, as did Carnival, Cheer and Parade. “Pretty Cure Cirque Charge!”

The enemy had been defeated, or so the girls thought.

“Miss Adachi! Miss Adachi!”

It was Suzume’s math teacher, Mrs. Kagabu. “Will you answer this question please?” 

“Oh! uhhh,” Suzume looked to her notes “forty-nine.”

“Correct.”

Suzume had never been a daydreamer, but lately this Pretty Cure thing had been taking up a lot of her mind lately. She was constantly thinking about who would attack next. It really stressed her out, but at least she could vent to Ellie. Just not in school. She would have to wait until she got home, and that she did.

As soon as she stepped into her house, Suzume ran into her room, and unattached Ellie from her backpack. “I’m nervous,” she said, without hesitation.

“About what-oh. That’s completely normal. Any Earthling would be.” 

“I mean, I think we’re gonna win, but what if we all die?”

“You won’t die, I promise.”

“You better fucking mean that.”

“I do.”

“Good.”

No more than a minute later, Emica burst into the room, sitting on her bed. “Suzu! Suzu! Suzu! Suzu!”

Suzume let out an exasperated sigh. “Whaaaaat?”

“I promised my friend Kaede I would come to her house today! She got toys for the new Precure team, and I wanna see!”

“Is it really that important to you?”

“Yes!!! Please?”

“Ugh, fine. Get out of uniform first, though.”

“No! I want to go NOW!”

“Fine, then. Let’s go NOW. Come on, come on, come on.” Suzume picked up her sister and brought her downstairs. Then, she pushed her out the door, slamming it behind her. “We’re gonna walk to Kaede’s now, let’s go.” 

Luckily, Kaede’s house was just two blocks away. Kaede was already sitting on the porch, that crappy merchandise in a pile on her lap. Suzume always hated Precure merch, but now that she was the one being commercialized off of, she despised it even more. “Yeah, have fun,” she told her sister, walking off to go back home. 

“Boo!”

Suzume turned around. Tamiko was right behind her. 

“Were you following me?”

“No, just found you. I live right across the street. Wanna hang out at my place for a little while? Or we could go to the rink or something.”

Suzume was shocked. Did this girl, who hated her for a pretty long time, just invite her over? “Is this some sort of practical joke?”

“Nope!”

“But I thought you hated me...”

Tamiko started cracking up. “You seriously fell for that?”

“For what?”

“Me hating you! It’s all just for attention! Now that we’re not in public, we can be friends!”

“I’m not even that popular, you made me so mad I called you a-”

“If I went for anyone more popular, everyone would hate me.”

Suzume was not having it, so she continued on her walk home, too angry to notice Tamiko’s visible disappointment. 

When Suzume got home, she immediately went to her room to check on Ellie, who was fast asleep until the door was opened. “Suzume!” Ellie squealed. “Wanna go to the circus and practice your magic?”

“Um, why the hell not? Should we get the others?”

“Of course! You know where they live?”

“Well I worked on a project with Airi once, so I know where she lives. None of the others, though.”

“Well let’s go to Airi’s.” And that they did. When the pair got to her front door, Airi’s mother answered. “Uhh, hey...” Suzume told her, strategically hiding Ellie, who forgot to go to keychain form, behind her back. “I’m Suzume, from Airi’s class. We’re working on something together, uhh, I don’t know if she told you but we need to go survey people all over Horitori for a study. You know where she is?” 

“Yep! She’s in her room. Want me to grab you girls some to go snacks?”

“That would be so nice of you! Please do!”

Not more than a minute later, Airi was downstairs, with a bag of cookies. She closed the door, immediately addressing Suzume. “What is this town survey and why haven’t I been told about it?”

Suzume gestured to the compact peeking out of Airi’s purse.

“Oh,” Airi replied. “I know where Aina lives, she’s just up the block. Should we go get her?”

“Of course!” Ellie answered. 

So, the trio went to Aina’s house, only to be stopped by Aina herself. “Yeah, I figured you’d be around here, let’s go.”

“Are you psychic?” Airi asked.

“Nope! Just got a good sense of what’s going on. Where’s Noa?”

“No idea,” Suzume answered.

“We’ll probably find her,” Aina said. “Let’s get going.”

Airi hesitated. “Are you so sure we should just-”

“Yep.” Aina replied. “Are we going or not?”

Aina was right. Noa was found outside the park on the way over. The group made their way to the circus, where Stripe and Whiskers were waiting for them, weapons in hand. Airi was about to put her key in her compact. 

“Not yet!” Stripe yelled. “First, you must familiarize yourself with your weapons.” Whisker handed the weapons to their respective owners.

“Alright Aina, you first.” 

Aina held up the Bonheur Wand.

“Pikapika Dream Blast!!”

Aina repeated.

Meanwhile, Airi and Noa were working with Stripe to learn spells with the Chanceux Sword and the Fête Ribbon.

On the other side of the tent, Ellie was having a hard time teaching Suzume how to use the Félicité Bow. Suzume was also confused, she seemed to do good with it the other day. Maybe she needed to be transformed? Now that Suzume thought of it, she didn’t fire too much, it was mostly used for that group attack. Either way, she was having a hard time. Ellie painted a target onto a nearby prop to see if that would help with aim. It didn’t. Both of them were frustrated.

“Alright Suzume,” Ellie said. “I didn’t think you would have such a hard time. Try again.”

Suzume tried again, and for the tenth time, the arrow landed on the floor. “I quit.”

“No! Don’t quit! Keep trying. Here, I’ll give you some tips. See all those stars?” Ellie gestured to the star pattern on the bow’s handle. Those will give you better grip. Try holding the bow from those.”

Suzume did so.

“Stand with your feet apart. Be very careful near the arrow. Take a deep breath, and fire!”

Suzume followed Ellie’s instructions. She prepared to fire, but there was a sudden, loud rip in the circus tent. Suzume ran to see what caused the rip, and the fairies followed her. It was Indigo, along with two other, identical robots.

Same pale white metal, same small, bright red eyes, same otherworldly vibe. Suzume just assumed that all of Takura’s robots are the same, the only difference was power, because aren’t the bad guys supposed to get more powerful? At least that’s what Emica and her friends say.

The three robots grabbed onto Airi, Aina, and Noa. Luckily, there wasn’t another to grab Suzume, so she helped push them out so the four girls could transform together.

“Magic circus jubilee change!“

“Magic circus carnival change!” 

“Magic circus parade change!”

“Magic circus cheer change!”

“For the happiness of the world! The Pretty Cure of beauty and grace! Cure Jubilee!”

“For the happiness of the world! The Pretty Cure of bravery and friendship! Cure Carnival!“

“For the happiness of the world! The Pretty Cure of creativity and love! Cure Parade!”

“For the happiness of the world! The Pretty Cure of peace and hope! Cure Cheer!”

The Cures begun to chase the robots, until they were in the middle of the street. They kept on going until they were right by Kaede’s house. Jubilee would have kept going but she saw Kaede on her balcony, cheering. She went inside and came out with Emica. “Hey, look, we’ve got fans!” Carnival whispered to the others. Jubilee knew that to Emica, seeing this fight live would be amazing. “I think we’ll stop here,” she told the rest of the group. Carnival ran over to the three robots, and repeatedly kicked them one by one. Jubilee joined in. When Parade also decided to join in, each girl took one robot. Cheer sat out for a minute, but eventually summoned her ribbon. “Pikapika golden tangle!” She called, which extended the ribbon to the robots and tied it around the three of them, with just enough time for the Cures to escape.

Indigo lifted his arm over the ribbon. It looked like he was going to do something, but he didn’t. He just waited. 

Meanwhile, the girls decided it would be best to perform an attack.

“Chanceux Sword!”

“Bonheur Wand!” 

“Félicité Bow!”

The four girls held their weapons in the air. 

“Pretty Cure Cirque Cha-”

Indigo moved his hand, and moved the weapons into his possession.

“H-how...” Cheer stuttered.

Jubilee had a sudden realization. Emica said that Kaede had a lot of merchandise for “the new Precure team”, obviously referring to Jubilee and her teammates. These weapons might not be magical, but they could be what they need.  “Hey!” Jubilee shouted up at the balcony. “You got any merch?”

“Yep!” Kaede responded. 

“She has all the merch!!!” Emica exclaimed.

“Toss it down here!” Jubilee told the younger girls.

Kaede and Emica threw it all down.

“What are you doing?” Parade asked Jubilee.

“Just watch.” Jubilee grabbed the replica of her bow. 

Cheer, catching on, grabbed the merchandise of her ribbon and tied it on Indigo’s hand and the traces of her real weapon.

Jubilee remembered what Ellie told her before.

“Stand with your feet apart. Be very careful near the arrow. Take a deep breath, and fire!”

Being very careful, Jubilee separated her feet and straightened her back. She held the arrow right by the star pattern on the handle, and fired! 

That cheap plastic arrow seemed to have done the trick. It broke the invisible barrier keeping the weapons away from the Cures, and they could finally attack.

“Pretty Cure Cirque Charge!”

As soon as they spoke those words, all that was left of the robots was a pile of scrap metal. The girls gasped. They had defeated their first enemies.

Kaede and Emica came down to grab their merchandise, and with a lot of persuasion, got them to sign it. Much to Carnival’s pleasure and Jubilee’s dismay, a few selfies were also involved. 

Emica looked up at the girls and smiled. “There’s a reason I love Precure so much.”

“And what would that be?” Parade asked.

“Moments like this! You guys always win, and defeat the bad guys! You keep our world safe! I wanna be like you one day.”

“And maybe one day you will,” Ellie said. “Thanks for your help.”

When Suzume got home, she was mor than happy to let Emica show off all the selfies she got, including a video of the Cures saying “Hi Suzume!” (That one was awkward.) Normally she would be annoyed, but, although Emica didn’t know it, she made her happy today. There was no better feeling than that.

[themyskira]

Amazons Attack! - part 1

Once upon a time, in the lead-up to the 2005-2006 cesspool of a crossover event that was “Infinite Crisis”, DC had plans for a miniseries called “Amazons Attack!”. The story was to be helmed by then-Wonder Woman writer Greg Rucka and artist Ethan Van Sciver, and it would deal with a conflict between the Amazons and the United States following Diana’s killing of Max Lord (and, presumably, building off the simmering background tensions between the two nations since the floating islands of Themyscira had crashed into the ocean off the coast of the US in early 2004).

The idea was nixed, but it never entirely went away. Over the next few years, it passed through the hands of numerous people at DC before finally landing in the lap of Will Pfeiffer in late 2006. By this stage, the original proposal was no longer feasible. The Max Lord story had been resolved, Themyscira had retreated entirely from the mortal plane, and there was no longer any interaction between the Amazon and American peoples.

But that wasn’t gonna stop DC from achieving their glorious vision of man-hating harpies attacking the US capital with swords and pointy sticks.

Around this same time, somebody else in the company had a genius idea. Jodi Picoult, a bestselling author with a strong following among women readers, had just released a new novel about family relationships and trauma, and one of the main characters happened to be a comic book artist. Why didn't they find out if Picoult was interested in writing an actual comic and, you know, lending DC some of that New York Times Bestseller cred?

Picoult wasn’t sure. She didn’t know if she had the time, let alone the interest, in the project. She’d never been much of a Wonder Woman fan. But her kids talked her into accepting, and so, with no previous comic writing experience and far too little editorial guidance, Jodi Picoult set out to make her mark on Wonder Woman.

Together, Picoult and Pfeiffer would craft one of the most widely-derided stories in Wonder Woman’s history. There would be crimes against the written word. There would be character assassination on a mass scale. There would be bees.

Part 1: Wonder Woman volume 3 #6 -- Jodi Picoult (writer) and Drew Johnson (artist)

Some context: For reasons too stupid to go into, Diana has decided to assume a secret identity. She hopes to can gain a better understanding of those she protects by living a normal human life… as an elite Department of Metahuman Affairs field operative charged with neutralising metahuman threats.

Agent Diana Prince is standing in a scungy restroom trying to remind herself that she’s not Wonder Woman. She’s doing that thing where the hero looks in the mirror and sees their alter ego reflected back at them, but due to some poor art decisions, it instead looks like she’s staring at a Wonder Woman poster that somebody has hung over a grotty sink.

More bad art choices occur in the next panel, where the mirror glowers at her behind her back.

Diana continues to puzzle over how having a secret identity is really hard since she doesn’t know the first thing about how to be a human being. Because it’s not as though a large part of Wonder Woman’s career as a public figure in Man’s World has been working as an ambassador and engaging with people across the world at all levels of society or anything.

Also, Jodi Picoult misspells “Themysciran” twice and both typos are left uncorrected, setting the standard for the number of editorial fucks given in this crossover.

Then she steps out of the restroom and into a superhero-themed amusement park, where we meet Diana Prince’s charmer of a partner, Tom Tresser.

“I can’t believe this is my job!” Tom exposition/whines. “I can’t believe we have to baby-sit some sore loser who won a reality TV show to become the new Maxi-Man! I can’t believe you are my partner! I can’t believe cotton candy costs four dollars now…!”

I can’t believe I’m reading this fucking crossover.

Diana diplomatically replies that she’s not used to working with a partner either, and Tom sneers that, based on what he’s read in her record, she’s “not used to working, period”. Because Batman was skilled enough to build an entirely new identity for Diana, but not smart enough to give her an employment history…? How the frig did she get hired by the DEO, then?

Also, great to see that Diana and Tom are both taking their assignment to prevent a human person from dying so seriously. While Maxi-Man is signing autographs out in the open, a sitting duck for any would-be attacker, Tom is gorging himself on fairy floss and Diana is trying to order a Wonder Woman-branded milkshake.

Diana: One Wonder Woman milkshake, please. Server: It’s been discontinued. It’s now called the Black Canary shake. Tom: Wonder Woman!! Now there’s a partner I wouldn’t mind having…

In case you hadn’t figured it out, Tom Tresser is the love interest. Whatta catch.

Also, no, Jodi. No. Either the Wonder Woman milkshake has been discontinued, or it’s been renamed the Black Canary milkshake. You can’t have it both ways.

This, by the way, is the first of several “hilarious” gags about how Wonder Woman is unpopular and regarded as kind of uncool. Picoult’s going for cheeky meta, but she comes off as ignorant, tone deaf and kind of mean-spirited.

In the real world, Wonder Woman doesn’t share the same level of popularity as Superman and Batman. But in the DC Universe, and particularly in the Wonder Woman comic, she’s consistently portrayed as a hero with a strong public presence and an ability to inspire, to the point where literally the issue preceding this one was a oneshot revolving around Wonder Woman’s influence as an empowering and inspiring hero.

If Picoult was playing, as Rucka did, with the idea that once Wonder Woman started using her public status to express her opinions, a large swathe of the public turned against her, that’d be one thing. But, no, she’s just decided, as a basis for her punchline, that Wonder Woman is a nonentity in the DCU, which is out of step with canon and does a huge disservice to the character.

As a meta joke, this also misses the point, because the fact that Wonder Woman doesn’t sell as many comics as Batman and Superman cannot be divorced from the the historical (and persistent) sexism in what remains a very blokey, male-dominated industry, not to mention the fact that DC put significantly more resources into producing and promoting Batman and Superman comics and merch. Those aren’t the only reason for the discrepancy in popularity, but they’re not things you can just brush off.

It gets even more unfortunate in the context of this particular comic’s publication. See, about ten months prior to this, DC had relaunched Wonder Woman with a new #1 issue penned by Allan Heinberg, who had recently earned much acclaim as the writer and co-creator of Young Avengers at Marvel. Between them, Heinberg and DC then proceeded to royally fuck up the relaunch. Heinberg wasn’t able to balance scripting duties with his TV writing job, causing issues to be delayed for months at a stretch, until it became clear there was no way he’d be able to finish his first arc before Jodi Picoult started her run and DC had to move on without him (he would eventually finish his story in the 2007 annual — over a year after he started the five-issue arc). Picoult’s first issue was only the third Wonder Woman comic to hit the stands in more than six months.

So basically, she’s making her funny-funny “boo, nobody buys Wonder Woman” against a backdrop of DC failing to produce Wonder Woman comics for months on end.

Anyway. Diana and Tom finally get around to doing their job and return to Maxi-Man’s signing table. Maxi-Man asks them to get him a chilli dog (“and a drink! I hear the Black Canary shakes are awesome!” GROANS FOREVER), and Tom has the nerve to be offended. “I don’t remember seeing this in my job description.” Well, gee, Tom, I don’t remember seeing ‘leaving your principal unprotected so you can slack off and stuff your gob with fairy floss’ in the job description either, and yet here we are.

Tom continues to grizzle about how unfair it is that his incredible talents are being wasted on this boring assignment, and this time Diana’s starting to get fed up. Meanwhile, the reality-show superhero they’ve been looking down their noses at is the only one who’s noticed that the rollercoaster behind them is spontaneously falling apart.

Of course, the moment Maxi-Man springs into action, he’s immediately knocked out cold by a piece of flying rubble, leaving Diana to take charge. Tom does what he does best, by which I mean he complains.

Diana: Tom! You get Maxi-Man to safety! I’ll get that crowd away from the roller coaster! Tom: But… I… we… Diana: There’s no time! Now! Tom: Who the heck’s she to order me around?!?

A quick costume change, and Wonder Woman saves the day, but not without internally griping about how stupidly confusing humans are.

Maybe this is what I was born for. To protect them… not understand them. But how can I…? They don’t even understand themselves.

urrrgghghhhhhh haaaaaate.

We never learn why the roller coaster spontaneously fell apart.

Later, as Diana and Tom make their way back to DOMA, Tom is still complaining. This time it’s about the fact that he missed Wonder Woman’s appearance at the theme park, because “I bet she looked hot”.

They stop at a store selling superhero merch so that Tom can get his niece a Wonder Woman action figure for her birthday. Diana comments that she thought Tom was an only child and Tom conspicuously doesn’t answer. And sure, it’s possible that the “niece” is a real human person who’s the daughter of a close friend or non-sibling relative, but given everything we’ve learned about Tom in the last eight pages, I think it’s far more plausible to assume that there is no niece and he’s planning on jerking off to a Wonder Woman action figure.

Diana continues to be terrible at having a secret identity.

“The Batman one’s better. Look — it’s got a detachable Batarang… But my — er, Wonder Woman’s lasso doesn’t even come off.”

All the Wonder Woman merch is 75% off because lol Wondy is uncool, and for some reason Diana is super offended and tries to lecture the poor store clerk about how obviously Wonder Woman is cool because saving the world is cool so there.

Clerk: Wonder Woman’s not cool, I guess. Diana: Doesn’t saving the world all the time make you cool? Clerk: All I know is she’s never sold as well as Superman or Batman… Tom: 75% off! Sweet!

Next, it’s time for a stop off at the gas station for some hilarious comedy hijinks around Diana’s total lack of familiarity with modern society!

Ha ha! Champagne comedy! All of this is just so new to her, don’t you know! It’s not like she’s ever lived among ordinary mortals

or held down a job

or, you know, interacted with any human being at length.

Now, I don’t blame Jodi Picoult for not knowing any of this. I’d be surprised if she’d even read a Wonder Woman comic before DC approached her, and though she would have done some background reading in preparation for this gig, she couldn’t be expected to be across every element of Wondy’s post-Crisis continuity, which at that point already stretched back two decades.

Her editors, however? Were not new to comics. They should have picked this shit up.

So, they go to get gas. Tom asks Diana to pay and she pulls out a ten dollar note. Tom points out this is insufficient in the most patronising way possible.

“Uh, gas is $3 a gallon, sweetheart. That might get us down the block…”

He asks he if she has a credit card, and she blinks in incomprehension. Yeah, because it’s not like Batman would have arranged cards and a credit history when he manufactured Diana’s false identity. Not like he’s known for being detail-oriented or anything. (And by the way, this is a thing that happened four fucking issues ago, so nobody has any excuses.)

Aaaaand Diana continues to suck at the secret identity thing.

Tom: Geez, how do you normally get around? Fly or something? Diana: Ha, ha. Funny. Fly places. Imagine…! Tom: Ten bucks? No credit card? Where are you from? Mars? New Hampshire?

Oh yeah, and this whole scene she’s been internally complaining about how humans are relentlessly acquisitive and materialistic and confusing and booooooo being an ordinary person is haaaaaaard.

Finally, they arrive back at HQ, where Sarge Steel chews them out for allowing a known fugitive like Wonder Woman to slip through their fingers at the amusement park, even though they weren’t at the park for Wonder Woman and this is literally the first they’re learning that Wonder Woman is a fugitive.

He also blames them for the rollercoaster getting destroyed, even though they had nothing to do with the damage and their only contribution was to get people to safety. Although, given how much they were slacking off on the job, it’s entirely possible that some metahuman terrorist snuck in and sabotaged the rollercoaster on their watch. Since Picoult still hasn’t told us how the rollercoaster was damaged, I’m just going to assume that this was the case.

It turns out that Wondy is wanted for questioning over her killing of Max Lord, even though she’s already been cleared of charges, so Tom and Diana’s new orders are to find her and haul her in. Awkwaaaaaard.

So obviously they get straight to work this important government assignment. I’m just kidding, they head straight for the DCU version of Starbucks. In fact, so far I haven’t come across any evidence that either of them do any work at all.

Things we’ve seen Tom and Diana do this issue:

Leave their principal unprotected so they can gorge themselves on junk food

Bicker and complain while a rollercoaster explodes behind them

Shop for superhero action figures

Fill up on petrol

Drink coffee

Things we have not seen Tom and Diana do this issue:

Their fucking job.

We get the usual obnoxious joke about Starbucks coffee sizes being weird and Diana being confused by them, which I’m pretty sure was hack material even in 2007.

Tom: Iced double Vente soy latte with Turbinado sugar, please. Diana: Um… Small cup of coffee? Server: Venti, Duovent, Grande, or Uber? Diana: Um… Small cup of coffee. [Everyone stares at her.] Diana: [whispers to Tom] I don’t think she speaks English…

They sit in the park, drinking their coffee, and Diana cries because humanity is confusing and everybody is mean to Wonder Woman.

No, really, that’s exactly what happens.

Diana: Why don’t you people just leave her alone? Who cares what she’s done? Tom: You talk about people like you’re not one of them, you know that? Diana: [CRIES]

Picoult’s Diana is so outrageously bad at maintaining a secret identity on even the most basic level, even a self-absorbed wanker like Tom Tresser ought to have cottoned onto her by now. Then again, he also failed to notice a rollercoaster collapsing a few metres away from him, so…

In an out-of-character display of ordinary decency, Tom gives Diana a pep talk, then heads off home. As he walks away, Diana hears a scream for help and jumps into action—

—aaaaaaand it’s an attractive young white college girl being mugged by a thuggish, armed black man. Definitely no ugly connotations lurking there.

Diana subdues him with a single punch, and is rewarded with proof that some people do still find Wonder Woman cool because, yes, we’re still on that tired gag.

College girl: I did a paper on you in my feminist theory class! I said you were an icon of womanhood we could all divine strength from… but I didn’t realise you were so… cool! Diana: I hope you got an A.

Tom, driving home, gets a call that Wonder Woman has been sighted in a seedy part of town. In addition to illegally talking on his phone — not hands-free — while driving, he does that thing people do when they’re pretending to talk on the phone, you know, helpfully repeating all the relevant information for the audience.

“Tresser. Wonder Woman? Seen at the Villains and Vixens Bar? I’m there, out.”

If we could hear both sides of the call, I can only imagine that it’d go something like—

Tom: Tresser.

Agent: Hey Tom, it’s Fred; hear you’re on the Wonder Woman case. I know it’s late, but we got a couple reports of sightings at the Villains and Vixens Bar. You happen to be anywhere near there?

Tom: Wonder Woman? Seen at the Villains and Vixens Bar?

Agent: Yeah, that’s what I just sa—

Tom: I’m there, out. [hangs up]

Agent: Jesus, I fucking hate that guy.

Basically what I’m saying is, he absolutely deserves it when he stumbles, ill-equipped, into a suspiciously flirtatious Wonder Woman who is wearing an earlier iteration of Diana’s costume and striking all kinds of ridiculous sexy poses, and instantly gets himself captured by what is obviously Circe in disguise.

Diana gets called back to headquarters, and she’s still wrestling with the question of how she can possibly do her job when her job is to arrest Wonder Woman. (WELL GEE, DIANA, I GUESS YOU SHOULD HAVE THOUGHT OF THAT BEFORE YOU TOOK A JOB UNDER AN ASSUMED IDENTITY AT THE DEPARTMENT DEVOTED TO POLICING METAHUMANS LIKE YOU.)

Also turnstiles. She is deeply perplexed by turnstiles.

comedyyyyyyyyyy

Sarge tells Diana that Tom has been abducted and a pair of Amazon bracelets were found at the scene. This is all the evidence Sarge needs to conclude that Wonder Woman has gone back to her old neck-snapping ways and must be stopped. He gives Diana the bracelets in an evidence bag and tells her to take them to the lab and see what she can find out.

I have questions.

Why weren’t the bracelets already being analysed at the lab? Did Sarge Steel wrestle the evidence bag off a hapless crime scene investigator and smuggle them up to his office just so he could play show-and-tell with Diana? How do they know the bracelets are Wonder Woman’s? In this superhero-merch-flooded world, wouldn’t Amazon bracelets be a dime a dozen? Or is Wonder Woman so ~uncool~ that every Amazon bracelet manufacturer immediately went out of business and buried the shameful evidence of their failed ventures in a New Mexico landfill alongside all those Atari cartridges? And why would Wonder Woman leave her bracelets behind? They’re not the kind of thing she’s likely to forget. Yes, we know Circe’s planted the bracelets deliberately, but the DOMA agents don’t.

And most importantly, why does Sarge Steel’s reflection look like Diana?

Diana doesn’t need to take the bracelets to the bag, because she knows they’re replicas and, what’s more, she knows where they come from.

“They were designed to complete a uniform I donated to the Wonder Woman Museum… which closed down over a year ago.”

Okay, now hang on.

I realise we’re back on the hilarious ‘Wonder Woman isn’t popular’ gag, which absolutely has not outstayed its welcome, but a museum is not the same thing as a theme park concessions stand or a pop culture store.  A museum does not just go, ‘buhhhhh, I know we’ve amassed this huge collection of great historical, social and aesthetic significance. Indeed, it is almost certainly the largest collection of Wonder Woman and Amazon-related items in the world, and much of it was donated by Diana herself, making it immensely valuable. But — and this is awkward — it turns out people don’t want to visit us because Wonder Woman isn’t cool. Guess we have no other choice but to pack it in and open a Black Canary Museum down the road.” That is not how museums work, Jodi.

I’m also confused as to why Circe needed to steal a Wonder Woman costume from a museum when it would have been far easier to glamour her clothing to look like Diana’s, the same way she glamoured her features. This seems needlessly complicated.

Diana whips off her glasses and does the spinny-transformy thing from the TV show. This is technically a power that Wondy has at this point in continuity — at the end of Allan Heinberg’s first arc, it’s revealed that Circe has given Diana the supremely useless “gift” of being able to turn her powers off, allowing her to switch between Amazon and mortal with a spin and a flourish.

Except, when this issue was published… Heinberg’s last issue hadn’t been. Remember, he flaked on his scripting duties, so the final instalment of his story and the introduction of the dumbass spinny-power-up wouldn’t come out until November 2007 — six months after this issue was released.

The issue ends on Wondy flying to the rescue while Circe lies in wait in the defunct Wonder Woman Museum, predatorily clutching a chained and shirtless Tom Tresser.

[juggydunes]

Would it be a sin? Chapter 2

You guys... I’m so sorry for the wait. I swear. I am truly ashamed. Everytime I’d open the word doc, words would vanish from my brain. But I managed to resist and now this has been written, edited ( At 5am, so please... be gentle) and posted.  Hopy you guys enjoy. As usual, this is unbeta’d and any mistakes are mine.  PS: I would like to dedicate this to @wordsonpages1 because she’s awesome and encouraged me to actually get some writing done. <3 

Summary:  "He thinks this is the reason there are books and poems about music, this is the reason music has been around for ages, because of people like her."

Ao3 link 

Jughead is messing with some melody on the ukulele he leaves on the office as they wait  for everyone to arrive. He’s had it since meetings had become a common thing. 

Jughead’s muse was fickle and when his inspiration showed up, his fingers would  itch to write down the melody, play it and make it clear in his head. That’s  where the ukulele had taken residence on Cheryl’s office, much to her chagrin.

Slowly,his fingers start playing a song that’s been stuck in his head all day. Smiling  lightly when Archie starts to hum along the tune. It takes only a few seconds  for Melody to use the table as a drum, lightly tapping her hands on the surface  to the rhythm.

Sometimes you've got to bleed to know,

That you're alive and have a soul,

But it takes someone to come around to show you how...

Archie starts singing with a smile. Jughead enjoys these quiet moments when they get to  jam out like when they were teenagers in Archie’s garage, not a single care in  the world for them beyond doing music and enjoying the process.

Now there are moments of stress where Melody wipes a tear off her cheek because she  misses her family. Archie will sometimes knock a few shots whiskey alone as he  watches the road fly by. Valerie would go out at night and not return until the  next day, sometimes that place would be Archie’s bedroom. Jughead locks himself in his apartment to surround himself with his instruments or a book and blurt everything he feels into a notebook.

The songs on the radio are ok,

But my taste in music is your face,

And it takes a song to come around to show you how...

Jughead joins Archie singing, both of them smiling along with Melody, Valerie moving her head to the beat. He can feel the stress leaking out of them little by little as they lose themselves in the song. This is where he feels more comfortable, like this is where he’s meant to be.

She's the tear in my heart, I'm alive,

She's the tear in my heart, I'm on fire,

She's the tear in my heart, Take me higher,

Than I've ever been...

By the time they reach the final chorus, Jughead and Archie have found the perfect way  to harmonize their voices. Archie hitting the higher notes when Jughead voice  covers the rest. There’s a glint in Archie’s eyes, a certain kind of happiness  that he suspects has to do with seeing him let go and sing along his best  friend.

Jughead lets the song die slowly, the last Than I’ve ever been done by him in a  light rasp that sounded more like he was speaking than singing, eyes closed. A  few claps make him jump from his seat, turning around to see Veronica, Betty,  Cheryl and two other men that Jughead recognized from being in Betty’s band.

“That was so good! I love Twenty One Pilots.” Betty says, blinding smile on her face. It  makes Jughead smile a little in reply. “I didn’t know you could sing.” She says  as Veronica and all of them come into the room.

“He does the backing vocals.” Archie answers, coming behind him and patting Jughead on the chest. He winces a little at the cave man act, then sees how her eyes light up at the sight of his best friend. “How are y’all?”

“We’re good, thank you for asking.” Betty replies, as they sit on the large table. One band in front of the other with Cheryl in one end and Veronica plus a production man next to them. “This is Kevin and Reggie, by the way. Guitar and Drums.” Betty says, pointing at them. Kevin waves somewhat awkwardly and Reggie nods, his hands on the pockets of his jacket nonchalantly.

“Of course you’re good. You’re about to sign on a great deal with our own Archiekins here. Who wouldn’t be good?” Cheryl says, raising her eyebrows. It makes Jughead snort at her words.

“Archiekins? I like it.” Veronica says. He catches the way Archie is giving Veronica his infamous Andrews smirk and has to control himself from rolling his eyes.

“We tried to make it his stage name but he wouldn’t give in.” Valerie says, faking a pout at Archie.

“Yeah, contrary to popular belief I actually want people to take me seriously…” Archie defends himself.

“Could’ve fooled me, buddy.” Jughead mutters to himself. Betty chuckles and he realises she’s directly in front of him. He smiles shyly in return.

“I heard that, buddy.” Archie says, narrowing his eyes at him. Jughead gives him an innocent expression and grabs the bottle of water in front of him, taking a sip.

“Shall we start?” Michael, the producer, says with a bored expression on his face like dealing with twenty somethings sucks the life out of him.

“We shall.” Cheryl answers with a big smile. She gets up and starts handing everyone papers. “I left pens in the middle of the table for everyone to sign with. I checked those papers myself so they’re perfect. Let me break it down… Basically, signing these papers you would be agreeing to go on tour with Archie and the bad as their supporting act. You would have 45 minutes to perform, the recommended amount of songs is around 9 but you get to mostly manage that. The first leg of the tour is happening  in two months, this is sort of last minute to be honest.” Cheryl’s eyes wander towards Archie and Jughead in apprehension. “You’d also be able to sell your merch in the stands we’ll give you. As I mentioned earlier, the first leg will involve 26 venues and for the second leg… if everything goes alright we will call you back.”

“Can we have a moment to read this?” Veronica says, all business now with a shocked Betty by her side, she looks like she’s processing information.

“Of course. Take all the time you need.” their manager answers.

“There you go.” Jughead gives the contract to Cheryl after signing it. They’re come very far with their relationship from high school. They actually trusted each other now, a development that happened after a real serious talk they’ve all had about actually making the band work. He barely looked over papers she handed him before signing anymore.

“Thank you, Jones.” The papers of the rest of the band follow while Veronica, Betty, Kevin and Reggie look over their papers. “Don’t you dare, J.” Cheryl says a few minutes later when Jughead’s hand moves towards the ukulele sitting on the chair next to him. He sighs, frowning at Cheryl who only gives him a stern glance like he’s some restless kid… which, alright, he kinda is.

“These look okay, Cheryl.” Veronica comments.

“You sure you don’t want to check those with a lawyer?” Cheryl asks her, moving her hair behind her shoulder with a flick of her head.

“Well, considering I’m one… it kinda has been checked.” Veronica’s sly grin makes her look sort of wicked to Jughead’s eyes.

“Wait, you’re a lawyer?” Archie asks, sounding surprised when she nods at him. “Nice.”

Veronica smiles at him in a way that would make Jughead fidget in his seat, but Archie only gets this really intense look on his face he’s only seen when he can’t play something and will practice it until he gets it right.

“Betty has good taste in managers.” The guitarist, Kevin, says with a smirk as he looks at the blonde.

“In friends, Kevin, in friends. ” Betty tells him and the two girls share an adoring look before Betty breaks it to hand Cheryl the signed papers. “There you go, Miss Blossom.”

“Miss Blossom, I like it.” Cheryl says. “I shall keep you, dear.”

“You should run while you still have time.” Jughead tells Betty, who smiles in amusement at him. “Save yourself.” he whispers dramatically before finally grabbing the ukulele.

“As you can see, Betty, I need people who truly appreciate me around here. I’ve been around these hobos for too long.”

“Hey!” Archie says. “I haven’t done anything.”

“Yet, Archiekins, yet.” Cheryl clarifies, gathering the rest of the paperwork. “Well, kids, that’s all. I officially welcome you to the tour.”

Betty claps happily with a dopey grin on her face, next to her bandmates who look equally excited. If Jughead looks really hard he thinks he can see her eyes being glassy at one point. Archie appears with a bottle of champagne and pours them on some toasting flutes that he’s never seen before.

Jughead barely has a sip after they toast, merely to keep appearances, not that anyone beside his friends will notice or know he doesn’t drink much alcohol and least of all champagne. He enjoys the contagious energy of the room, almost tasting the happiness rolling off on waves from Betty and her bandmates.

“We should continue celebrating. My house? What do you guys say?” Archie says when the champagne is gone and it’s time for them to leave the offices. Jughead closes his eyes briefly because he’s supposed to stay at Archie’s apartment today and he really wants to just crash on any flat surface he can find.  

“Are you sure?” Betty asks, wide eyes.

“I’m always up for a little party.” Reggie says, nodding and grinning.

“Yeah, I’m sure. You in?” Archie directs this last question to Veronica, who doesn’t seem as inclined to celebrate as the rest of them. She looks over at Betty and Jughead can see some weird unspoken conversation happening before she turns back to Archie.

“Sure! Only if you’re buying, though.” Veronica winks slyly.

“Any time.” Archie answers, grinning back at her. “Okay guys, let’s head out!”

“You coming with?” Jughead asks Cheryl, who is lightly chatting with the producer as she gathers the contract papers and puts them into a folder.

“Oh no, I have a date night with Joshua.” Cheryl tells him. “Some relaxing before the chaos starts.”

“Okay, say hi to him from me.” Jughead says, already walking backwards. “See you soon, chief.”  He turns to the door, almost colliding with Betty and Kevin who are chatting near the door in hushed tones. “Whoops, sorry.”

“No damage done.” Kevin says, lightly guiding Betty towards the exit. “Is Archie’s house far from here?” he asks.

“Uhm… not really. I’d say it’s 15 minutes.” He replies, pressing the button for the other elevator. Reggie, Veronica and Archie laughing as they enter theirs.

The trip on the elevator is passed in a short almost comfortable silence. Jughead leans on the side wall, closing his eyes for a minute before the doors open again, leaving them on the entrance of the building.

“Hey, Jug, you okay taking Betty,  Kevin and Valerie? I’ll take Veronica, Reggie and Melody.” Archie says as soon as they step out of the elevator. Jughead takes a deep breathe. Act nice, they’re the best supporting act for us. You can’t screw this up.

“Sure. Are you guys okay with that? My car is a block away.” He turns to ask them because, unlike Archie, he does have some manners… most of the time.

“Yeah, of course. We could take a cab there, thought, you don’t have to drive us.” Betty insists, he finds her attitude endearing and briefly wonders if she’s always so soft.

“It’s not trouble. I need to drive my car to Archie’s one way or the other, taking you doesn’t bother me at all. Come on…”

They make the short walk to his car, Kevin and Betty chatting by his side, Valerie joining the conversation occasionally.  Jughead turns down the music that begins blaring on his speakers as soon as he starts the car, feeling slightly disappointed when Valerie sits on the front seat, leaving Betty and Kevin on the back.

“Oh, you’re in a Muse mood?” Valerie asks, raising her eyebrows expectantly.

“Somewhat.” He simply answers, aware of the people listening.

Valerie knows him too much, especially about his moods, as the band likes to call them. Said moods include the battery of his phone dying because he will lock himself up on his home studio, unreachable, only to come back to life with a few new songs and dark circles under his eyes. Like clockwork, Jughead will start listening to Muse days before and sometimes during. There’s just something about the band that makes him feel ethereal and like he can handle everything that’s thrown at him, a powerful force flooding his veins.

“A muse mood?” Betty asks from the back. Jughead can see her frowning on his rearview mirror.

“A long stupid inside joke. Apparently when I hear Muse I get philosophical, annoyingly so. I personally disagree.” Jughead tells her, carefully avoiding the realness of it all.

“You say that because you’re not the one making a joke only for someone to start a rant about the purpose of life, creativity, how Tarantino is a cinematic genius or all of those together.” Valerie chuckles when Jughead glares at her.

“Well… in his defense Tarantino is a cinematic genius.” Betty says, shyly.

“Thank you! Finally, someone with a brain.” Jughead yells, lifting his hands for a second before putting them back on the steering wheel. “Don’t listen to them, Betty. We’re smarter and they’re just jealous. We’ll make our own band full of Tarantino and Muse.”

“We’ll be instantly famous.” Betty plays along. “We can write odes to Quentin.”

“I like the way you think.” Jughead looks at her in the rearview mirror, catching her eyes for a second and he can’t help but smile back at her, content spreading through his chest.

“Don’t give him any more ideas, girl.” Valerie tells Betty, smirking. The comfortable silence taking place for a few minutes, the music softly playing.

“We’re here.” Jughead says, pulling over next to Archie’s car.

“How the fuck are they already here?” Valerie asks, frowning as they get out of the car.

“You know Archie, his childhood dream was becoming speed racer.” Jughead kids, making Valerie laugh.

He opens the door to the apartment with his key, music can be heard from the outside. Jughead is already mentally preparing himself for the imminent headache as he opens the door to Archie’s obvious bachelor pad.

He has white bare walls, a comfortable couch with a huge tv and a guitar rack  on the other end of the living room. Archie doesn’t really have a home studio, choosing to use Jughead’s, even buying some gear for it himself. Jughead and Archie worked best together so they had decided it would be useless to spend money in two studios when they could have one and buy all the good stuff.

Jughead get himself a beer from the fridge as the rest talk and get comfortable in the living room. He later sits with them, picking one of the comfortable chairs and enjoying the chatter and laughter going on in the room. He thinks that maybe this could work, if they’re already getting along nicely, maybe tour could work . He feels like a broken record, but after all he’s been through it stills feels like everything could fall apart any minute.

A smile spreads on his face, relaxing further on the chair and laughing along with his friends as Archie tells a tour story of how Valerie accidentally kicked something and Archie’s guitar stopped sounding. His friend, in a break of genius, had asked the sound guys to bring him an acoustic guitar and they had done the rest of the show unplugged. It had been one of the greatest experiences in Jughead’s short life, the energy he had felt that night as the crowd went silent to listen them, softly singing along… he would never forget it. He vividly remembers going back to his apartment afterwards and crying like a baby because the emotions were too big for his chest.

It’s a while after when he makes his way to the balcony to have a cigarette and to get away from the noise if he was being honest. Times like these he wishes he could adapt more to social events like Archie or the rest of the band does, but they simply drain the energy out of him. He needs to prepare himself mentally each time. Concerts are different, that’s probably the only social interaction that he absolutely loves.

The night is quiet, a slight breeze cools his heated skin and clears his thoughts. Jughead watched the smoke from this cigarette disappear into nothingness, so enraptured on the simple action that he doesn’t notice her until she’s right beside him.

“Can I have one?” She asks, nodding towards the cigarette in his fingers.

“Why, Cooper, I didn’t picture you as a smoker.” He says, passing her the box and lighter, watching as she lights the cigarette. He notices how she closes her eyes at the first drag, her shoulders relaxing a little.

“I’m not. I just like to smoke from time to time.” She tells him, leaning her arms on the rail. “What did you picture me like?”

Her question surprises him and he turns to really look at her. She’s looking back at him, unflinching, eyes a little glassy from the alcohol, but open and curious as they stare at each other. Jughead looks at her polka-dot short sleeved dress, her wavy blonde hair braided on the top, black ankle boots and the tiny key necklace that adorns her neck. She looks amazing, there’s no denying that.

At first, Betty wouldn’t really stand out from other girls, but if you look closer, Jughead realises, you could see the fire in her eyes. He can see the passion and determination in those green eyes, it makes him want to lean forward so he can take a closer look, perhaps, right into her soul. The air changes the longer they stare at each other.

“Well, you seem like the kind of girl that has this whole vocal chords ritual, a voice freak if you will…” He states, putting the cigarette back to his mouth. “Kinda like Archie does.” The tension vanishes with the sound of her laughter.

“I actually kinda have a vocal chords ritual but I do indulge in a cigarette every now and then.” Betty answers with a smile.

“Such a rebel.”

“So… how long have you known Archie?” she asks, not looking at him.

“Since we were little kids. Our parents were friends.” Jughead replies, used to this question.

“Wow, that must be cool. Growing up and then touring with your friend.” Betty sighs. “I’m really glad I got this gig, to be honest. I can’t believe this is really happening, I’ve been a fan of Archie for a while but I sent the supporting act request on a whim. Veronica talked my ear off for two days before I actually sent it, I had no expectations at all.”

“Well… you’re really good. You deserve it.” He simply says, not knowing how to answer, his stomach twisting a little.

“To be completely honest, this feels a little like a dream… being in his house, being here with you, your bandmates. I can’t believe I’m going on tour with the dude that makes me cry with his songs sometimes.” Betty says, chuckling self-deprecatingly.

“What?” Jughead asks, a little dumbfounded, her words running through his head.

“Yeah, I know. It’s a little silly, I guess, but the first time I heard Ode to sleep I cried like a baby.” Betty tells him, smiling shyly. “Don’t tell him that, It’s a little embarrassing. But it hit me so hard…”

Jughead’s heart is beating wildly in his chest, he tries to look nonchalant but inside it feels like a cocktail of various emotions spilled on his brain. His stomach twists painfully as he listens to her go on and on about the amazingly written metaphors and exceptional narration of a story in just one song. He feels sick, his headache is back.

“Yeah… he’s great.” Jughead answers when he realises Betty’s looking at him like she’s expecting a reply. “Hey, do you mind if we go back inside?”

“Sure…” Betty looks a little surprised, but they head back to the party where she’s called by Veronica as soon as they step inside the living room.

The sick feeling stays with Jughead the rest of the evening, making him quieter as his friends talk. Thankfully, nobody seems to notice he isn’t really laughing along like he was before. He waves the group goodbye from the sofa as they head to the door, sighing in relief as soon as the door closes.

“Okay, spill.” Archie says, coming to sit beside him.

“What?” Jughead asks, frowning at him.

“Don’t look at me like that. Other might not know you so well, but I actually can tell when something happens to you. It’s my superpower.” His friend says, grinning at him, proud of himself. Jughead chuckles before sighing.

“It’s nothing important.” He looks down at his hands for a moment. “She told me that the first time she listened to Ode to sleep she cried.”

“Dude, that’s awesome!” Archie says, turning to face Jughead fully, arm on the back of the sofa as he smiles.

“Yeah… she also told me not to tell you because it might be embarrassing because she was such a big fan of you and your lyrics.” Jughead’s voice drips with a bitterness he wasn’t expecting, it makes him frown.

“Jug… she doesn’t know.” Archie says softly. “Nobody knows.”

“Valerie, Cheryl, Melody and a bunch of other people do…” He tries, knowing he sounds like a child.

“It doesn’t count if they’re co-workers, man…” Archie tells him, hand on his shoulder. “You don’t let anyone know.”

“Yeah, I know…” Jughead sighs, rubbing his face with his hands. “It just… the way she spoke about the songs, man… you should’ve listened to her. It was like there were something precious.”

“They are, Jughead, they truly are. You know…” Archie starts. “We’ve talked about this, all you gotta say is tell me and we’ll change it. People should know you’re the writer of these amazing songs…”

“I know.” Jughead stops his friend, suddenly feeling more tired than he’s felt in weeks. “It’s okay. I don’t need that, it was just… a moment, you know? I’m happy with the way things are. Besides you’re the jock of this relationship, you’re the only built for fame, my friend…”

“Jug…” Archie starts as Jughead gets up from the sofa.

“I’m going to bed, pal. I’m just really tired. Everything is okay, I swear. We’re okay, forget I said anything.” Jughead tries, eyes silently pleading his friend to drop the subject.

“Sure.” Archie says even though he doesn’t sound sure at all.

Jughead walks down the hall to the guest bedroom that’s more his than for guests and closes the door behind him before taking his clothes off and falling into bed.

He knows Archie is trying to talk to him. He’s been trying to talk to him for years now, since they started this whole music career and Jughead refused to let people know he was the intellectual owner of most of their songs. He’s painfully aware of the way insecurity played a role on that decision, but he also wanted to make music without the pressure of the fame.

Jughead was comfortable as the sidekick, comfortable being the bassist of the grand Archie Andrews. In the intimacy, they knew they were a band, but for the public Archie was a solo artist that had the graciousness of taking his best-friend as his bassist. But Jughead thought he got the best of both worlds... going on tours, writing, playing music and all that without the pressure of the fame, the interviews and photoshoots he saw his friend go through daily.

The way Betty had spoken of his song brought something he had spent his whole life repressing… the desire to be seen. All his life he had taken the role as an observer.  Observing as Archie grew popular in high school, observing how people looked at Archie and really believe that he could be the next big artist. Being the observer kept him safe . He knew what it was like and wore that as a comforting second skin. Sometimes, though, like tonight… he craved the “spotlight”.

There was a moment when he had to restrain himself from telling her the truth. That’s me! I did that! That’s mine! Those are my words!... He chuckles bitterly at the idea now, how naive. At this point, he doesn’t think anyone would believe him if he went and said he wrote most of Archie’s songs. Hell, sometimes he isn’t even sure. Not that he would ever try it. Too risky, he thinks.

Feeling weirdly defeated and extremely tired, Jughead closes his eyes.

He dreams of green eyes and disappointed glances.

[gamesception]

Night in the Woods, part 8

I did actually get out of the apartment a bit.  As a result, I missed a message that I really would have rather been here for.  And I haven’t gotten any closer to being able to articulate how i feel about this segment.  But sure.

Sure, let’s go on a date.

smooth

less so

Alright, here we go.

I miss malls.  I was never a mall rat really, you kind of need friends for that, but still, I liked them.  Lots of different stores, movie theater, food.  You could spend a whole day at a mall for not that much money.

And now they’re all dying.

There was one mall I particularly liked in Poughkeepsie where I used to live, the South Hills mall.  It was like, the cheaper dumpier alternative to the bigger fancier Galleria mall not three hundred yards away.  Used to check out media play, radio shack, watch a movie in the cheap theater - one of those theaters that screens movies after they get out of other theaters but usually before they’re out on video, but if the movie was popular enough they’d just keep running them.  The lord of the rings movies were in there right up until the next movie came out, that sort of thing.

I went there on a date once and saw this... submarine movie?  Like about a soviet nuclear sub or something?  I remember it because the reels were put together out of order, so one minute everyone’s dying of radiation poisoning out of nowhere, the next they’re all fine playing soccer on the ice the next they’re contracting the radiation poisoning they were dying of earlier, then everyone’s dead.  it was pretty funny.

Maybe its not surprising these places are dying now.  I mean, again, South Hills was, is, like right next to another bigger mall, who needs two malls?  But then on top of that they have curfews and mall cops kicking out unattended teens and just...  I don’t know.  Teens should have somewhere to go, you know?

I don’t know.

yeah.

Yeah, basically.

But of course Hot Topic is still around.  I wasn’t cool enough to be punk, and was always too fat to be emo, and not confident enough to be goth.  I kind of wanted to be all of that, but again, no friend group.

Even so, I used to buy Johnen Vasquez comics & merch there, and dream of being a cooler sort of uncool than I was.

I like to make fun of hot topic, but not bitterly or seriously.  It was/is a store for teens, and teens should have a place they can go and be teens and not feel embarrassed about it.

This game has really captured the ‘20 year old in hot topic’ experience.

I want a blacklight poster.  I never had a blacklight poster, but I always wanted one.

Ok, here’s a thing.  In particular, here’s that impulsive thing that I wish I was because that’s a way better flaw than being indecisive to the point that i never end up actually doing anything.

I mean, shop lifting is a shitty thing to do, because working retail sucks enough without dealing with a manager screaming down the back of your neck over lossage or whatever, but still.

This red light green light shoplifting game is ridiculous.

silly.

Mae talks Bea into stealing something.  I apparently forgot to snap any pictures of that, but it went as well as could be hoped.

peer pressure.  cute girl.  take your pick.

I’ve never shoplifted.  I mean, I’ve done crimes, but not that particular crimes.  I wouldn’t have had the nerve.

I’m not sure I ever really believed in god.  I remember trying very hard to convince myself I did, because it mattered to my parents.  Well, to my dad anyway.  But not really.

I used to believe in santa claus.  like, when I was really little.  I still remember when I stopped believing - I was maybe six or seven, and had peeked in at my parents present stash before christmas.  Then those same gifts from my parents’ closet ended up labled as ‘from santa’, and i knew.  It was pretty devastating, but I got over it.

I wouldn’t say santa is why i don’t believe in god, I like to think i would have come to the same conclusions about that anyway, but because of santa i don’t think I ever started to actually believe in the first place.

By the time I was old enough to actually grasp the concept, I was all, ‘didn’t I already learn this lesson?’  Like, I had been primed to see stories about a big bearded man who lives on top/above the world, who rewards everyone who does good and punishes everyone that does bad, as just fairy tales and bed time stories.

I don’t think I ever even once talked to my dad about it.

I still don’t think I have, really.

I think it bothers him that I’m an atheist.  Like he feels he did something wrong, as a parent, that he messed up somewhere and that’s why I am ‘this way’.  Sort of like Mom feels when I’m sad sometimes for no reason.  Anyway, Dad’s the kind of guy who wouldn’t care what i believed in, as long as i believed in something.  Like, my family was Catholic, or at least my dad was, I think my mom was Lutheran or Methodist growing up, but...  My youngest brother, the one in the marines, has apparently been going to Pentecostal mass, and Dad’s cool with it.  My second youngest brother is into assorted hippyish stuff, meditation or whatever, I don’t really know, but Dad seems at least somewhat cool with that too.  And he got along great with a Jewish friend I had in college, one who got progressively more observant and spiritual as he got older, they used to talk about history, religion, etc.

I think he just wants people to have a spiritual life, and trusts enough in the benevolence of the Almighty that God wouldn’t begrudge people in the hereafter for picking the ‘wrong faith’ in life as long as they were still seeking a greater truth, still reaching for that ‘something’ beyond this world whether they thought of it as ‘God’ or whatever.  And it’s not like he thinks his faith is right and everyone else’s is wrong, either, that faith in God’s benevolence on the matter is something he extends to himself as well.

But believing in nothing, or at least nothing beyond the physical world, that bothers him.  And that it bothers him bothers me.

I don’t know how I ended up on this track.

I really need to stop doing these write ups before bed, I get way to over-sharey when I’m tired.

My favorite mall food was Nathans.  I liked their fries.  Also the cinnamon-sugar soft pretzels from Auntie Anne’s.

The thing about being a reclusive shut in through all of high school is that you miss out on this drama.  Like, everyone else is learning how to be a human adult the hard way, but the hard way was too hard for me, so I just never learned.

Yeah, I don’t know about that.

I already talked about that.

God, god this is so fucking relatable.

So fucking relatable.  My job isn’t even very hard.  It’s only part time, even.  And it still leaves me completely drained.  I need to start trying to find a Real Job again, start doing something with this Computer Science degree I got more than a year ago now before it joins the Studio Art degree in my box of expensive regrets, but I’m not sure how I’d even manage a Real Job when this part time office work leaves my so drained already.

Are we going to find out?

I guess not yet.

Not exactly what you want to hear on a date.

This is where I start to have problems with this segment.  Like, everything up to this point has been so relatable, so real it fucking hurts, but this?

They wouldn’t let people just do that, even at a dying mall where nobody cares, and the supports wouldn’t be enough to let you anyway.  Not even Mae is that impulsive, and if she were she’d have a broken leg, or neck, not a Magical Moment (tm)

Like, I guess it’s not any more unrealistic than catting around on the power lines?  But I sort of SoD’d that away as a euphemism for creeping around the back ally’s and what not, getting into places she shouldn’t be.

I wasn’t literally imagining a 20 year old dropout climbing power lines and walking around on them.  Traffic would stop for that, police would be called.  It would be a big deal, not something cute.

And I guess I could do the same here, like imagine that platforming segment as a stand in for, like, slipping through some maintenance door to access the machine?

But even then, this doesn’t feel real, like the rest of the game has.

Someone would call the cops.

This is sweet and cute and all

But it doesn’t feel real, it feels like something out of a sappy romantic comedy, just about the least real genre of movie there is.

She forgot your fucking mom died.  Your mom died and she wasn’t there for you at all, and couldn’t even be bothered to remember.

I’m sorry, but that just feels like a bigger deal than this game is making out?  Like Bea should still be angry about it, like there should be some sort of, i don’t know...

I still don’t know how to put this.

It felt like the game is being dishonest at this point.  Like it set itself up in everything before this point, especially the campfire scene, like it was going to be just brutal.  Like rip my guts out and just stomp on them relentlessly.  And I kind of wanted it to?  Like, I complained about how painful it was, and it was painful, but i wanted it to be painful.  It deserved to be painful.

Like the game dredged up my worst qualities, and rubbed my face in them, and I was into it.  Like, ‘yes, I’m a terrible person, I should feel terrible, make me feel terrible’.  Like I had this bottle of self hatred that I’ve learned through the years never ever to open, and this game was like, ‘you know what, lets open that bottle, lets sneak into the booze cupboard of your soul and pull out the poison bottle from the back and lets just fucking drink it, just do it.  You and me, we’ll drink it together.’

And I got the bottle out, and popped the stopper and started drinking all the hatred...

And now I’m looking around, and where’s my drinking buddy?

They’re nowhere to be found.

I only got the poison bottle out because of you, Night in the Woods!  It was your idea!  You can’t leave me alone with this bottle of self hatred that you convinced me to pull out!  We already started this!  It’s too late to decide that this is all getting a little too real for you and you’d rather be a cutesy twee romcom, instead!  I like cutesy twee romcoms, I like cute cartoon girlfriends, but you don’t get to be that, Night in the Woods!

You don’t get to decide that things were getting too real for you when you’re the one that made it real in the first place!

Fuck you, game.

Fuck you.

You made me feel things, and then you decided the things I feel were too gross for you, so you just fucking left me here alone.

FUCK.

YOU.

And that’s why I feel conflicted about this otherwise very cute date scene.  <3

I’m glad they returned the stuff they stole.  Crimes are cool in theory, but in practice people get hurt and that isn’t cool.

I’m feeling drained again.  I’ve still got more I already played to post, and I was hoping to actually play more tonight, but... ugh.  Tomorrow, I guess.

[simplyscarlet]

Side characters or “misfits” rant.

Today I saw yet ANOTHER freaking Sabo figure coming out. How many more can there be? Sabo is great, Sabo is cool. But damn. Sabo-saturation with all this Sabo-chandise. 

So I made a kind of eye-rolly comment of like “Wow another Sabo? Seriously, would it kill them to have a little variety and make [insert minor character]?”

And I got such backlash from the fan that posted it. Now, I fully admit, I shouldn’t have made a snark on a friend’s post. Obviously they like Sabo and can post what they want on their wall. I owned up to that and apologized. But it wasn’t a personal attack against Sabo or her enjoyment of him, it was just an observation that EVERYTHING is Sabo. 

But here’s where it goes someplace. She starts talking about how awful it is to hear SO MANY TERRIBLE THINGS about Sabo ALL THE TIME and that the fandom doesn’t love him. 

An Ace fan joins in with HOW AWFUL it is to hear jokes about Ace being dead all the time and that the community shouldn’t be so awful to Ace fans. 

This went on. And on. And on. Negative comments about Sabo’s popularity is tantamount to joking about Ace’s death with an Ace fan. What they have to deal with as fans of these two. Nobody loves Marco either. It’s so hard. And on.

Okay…look, the last time I checked, Ace and Sabo (and Marco) were beloved characters of the One Piece fandom. They have mountains of merchandise. Fans adore them. Fan art and fanfics abound everywhere. Cosplayers everywhere. 

So they are going on apparently HOW HARD Sabo and Ace fans have it in the OP community….and I’m like…umm…ummm?

People saying terrible things about the characters you love?

The first fanfiction that I ever, ever wrote, was about Alvida. I idolized her. The first review I ever received, called her a “fat biatch.”

The first fanfiction review I ever received called my favorite character a fat biatch.

In my early days in the fandom, I would find similar sentiments echoed around forums. “Buggy’s bitch” sticks out.

I couldn’t find any fanfics central about her. Some fanart, but nothing spectacular.  

There isn’t much merchandise for her. I have her WCF and another small trading figure. A pin. (There is even less for Dellinger!)

When I first started cosplaying, I was lucky to be recognized. It’s gotten better, but I still get “Boa Hancock,” and “Nico Robin.” Sometimes people just can’t remember her name - so I get “that fat woman/The fat chick/Buggy’s girlfriend/Oh you’re the one who was fat.” (I then go into my prepared body positivity speech.)   

Once when going to a panel with friends, the person at the door checking IDs looked at my costume and sneered “Come on, you have got to me kidding me. She’s such a bit character.” 

I learned pretty fast that nobody cared about Alvida. And I decided pretty fast that I didn’t care if nobody cared, about Alvida….because I cared.

When Dellinger tap danced away with my heart, I knew pretty much what was coming. My entire fandom narrative has been about ‘bit characters.’ The only difference is that Alvida has the immense luxury of being a reoccurring villain and I am grasping to keep Dell alive in a fandom that was all to happy to ditch Dressrosa. (@organizedchaotics …Dellinger made me fully appreciate your struggle with Saldeath.) 

I write, draw, and cosplay for myself because these characters make me happy. But I accepted long ago that few people hugely care about these characters, and that’s okay. It just means my fandom experience is going to be different than the experience of someone who likes a main character. It’s neither good nor bad, just different. 

But don’t tell me how its apparently some hard tragedy to be a Sabo or Ace fan, when you will almost always be recognized by your people at conventions. You have piles of merchandise. You can find spiffy new fanarts and fanfics every day about your characters. People will always be happy to share thoughts and discourse about those characters. You will be in movies and specials and will always be fairly universally enjoyed. 

My characters have never had that luxury and never will. There is not new fanart or fanfics or eager fan discussion about Dellinger every day. I have been creating my own content for Alvida since day one, since no one else really is. And I don’t mind. (I’m just jealous of your merch!) But it just irks me a little that people are painting themselves into martyrs for suffering through the tortures of liking a main character. So what if someone rolls their eyes at all the Sabo stuff or makes the occasional Ace death comment? If that’s the worst of your fandom troubles…I think you’re pretty solid. If I reacted that way every time I got called ‘fat’ at a convention, I would never see the damn convention because I would be too busy monologing about HOW HARD THIS IS OH THE TRAGEDY SO UNLOVED IN THIS FANDOM. 

I just want to clarify I don’t think there is anything wrong with liking main characters. They are the main characters. You’re supposed to love them. But I guess don’t invent problems when you’re on your 19th Sabo figure and Sabo was in Film Gold and Alvida was the size of my fingernail in her last appearance. This isn’t a ‘most unloved character’ competition.

I’m just going to go hang with my two Alvida figures that are smaller than my hand and my Dellinger figure that is smaller than my thumb. 

[chickenstuffedwithmozzarella]

Holii! Yesterday your inbox was hungry again and ate the ask number 8 :( (i don’t really know if the problem lies on your inbox or im doing something wrong when sending the asks tbh). Im sending it again only bcs it was the first part of the two asks i send about my sister, and maybe getting only half of it doesn’t make that much sense. You don’t have to answer, it just bothered me, sorry xd

Awwwww, I have customer that always says holiiiii!!! When she comes. And now she reminds me of you, jajajaa. But I read your holiii!!! with her voice 😅. I counted yesterday asks and there were 10, so maybe this time the problem was in your end 😝😝?? I see we’re both geeks of tech things,jajajajaja. Also, where is the message about your sister again??? jajajajajaj 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️ what a pair. I thinks is just Tumblr, that is shit… jajaja

I saw the video of SOOT/Durkink. I wasn’t expecting that and i laughed too loud. JAJAJAJA. Also, i don’t know if you have instagram, but did you see Liam’s stories? He tried singing JBalvin parts and it was a mess. I guess they can now understand my struggle. He looked so lost, poor baby. That was even better than “una sacapuntas”. 😂 Anyway, i’m going to answer you now. (oh, and i’m sorry but for me its no under the cut. No even if i log in and read it on my dash).

Jajajajajja, it was very funny, wasn’t it? I’m gonna tag you in everything that makes me laugh,jajajajaja. Awwww, liam was so cuteeeee. I laughed so much as his puppy face. He looked so lost. He was so convinced he was talking Spanish… ayyyyyy. It’s a 10 for the effort. I kept thinking: that’s how I must sound singing in English,jjajajaja.

Here we go. Okay, first of all,i have to say that this new distribution was so confusing the first time i read dit, bcs it took me a while to figure out what were my asks and what were your answers, so at times i started reading and went…uuumh, that sounds familiar, i could have written that. Waaait… 🤦 🤦 🤦 Quite lame, jajajajaja. (1)

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I’M SO SORRY FOR THAT MESS!!! I wrote everything in a note. And your asks were in bold. And when I started I thought: remember to check later that it stays this way on tumblr!! Butttttt, when the time came I was SO SLEEPY!!! I totally forgot!!! 😅😅. So, I’ll go back to normal this time, just in case (though I’m writing it the same way. I hope I don’t forget later🙏🏻). Also, I wanted to tell you a lot more, but I forgot everything,jajaja.

Yees, im feeling better, thanks for asking

Well, if it was fatigue, you have the whole weekend to rest. Hope your feeling better. Lol, I feel the same, jejeje, when I see you’ve messaged me, I’m like: how do I let her know I’ve read it, but I can’t answer now??? Asjkxs;sjdhcbuidsljd

I’ve been streaming it since yesterday, and imo is not bad. There’s only one sentence im feeling a bit ambivalent about, bcs im picky like that, but i think its quite good. I cant wait to hear it on the radio and tell everybody “THATS MY SON”(My friends are gonna freak out when they discover that for once, i know the lyrics of a JBalvin song. JAJAJAJ). You have to work 10h each day? That’s a long shift. Is that your usual schedule or is only this weekend? Espero que te sea leve 😘 (3)

I heard it again today, for a bit. And it isn’t reggeatton exactly? It doesn’t have that rhythm that I hate, jajjaja. So I think I’ll be able to listen to it. I haven read the lyrics yet, so I can’t tell you anything about it :/ Same about my friends,jajajjaa. I think mine are gonna be more shocked about me knowing a song in Spanish,jajajaja. They’re always teasing about not liking Spanish music. Which is not true, but well… 🤷🏻‍♀️ What sentence you don’t like? And my shit is parted, so al least I have a couple of hour of rest. It’s how small shops work. So 🤷🏻‍♀️ I don’t have to be back till next Saturday, so… jajajajaja

Ohhh. (I see what you did with IICF lyrics. Smart girl). I was indeed paying attention. I swear. I took notes and answered you at the same time. I’m used to take notes of the subjects while doing essays, so it wasnt hard. Your taxes are on safe hands, don’t worry. My indecisiveness help me broke the system. You choose the pink??? Well done!💖 (4. I think? Why do i lost track so easily?)

How lucky you are, you can pay attention to more than one thing. If smartphones and SM had been a thing back on my student days, I would have failed everything. In fact I did. The first time I had internet at home, I was 15. Oh god! The memories. Back then, Terra’s chat (that you probably don’t know what it is. I myself, don’t remember exactly either) was very popular to talk to people. I met a guy. Ah! My first real crush. We talked everyday via Messenger!! Awwww, he was 17. We talked so much… jajajajajaja I was pretty obsessed. We talked from 6pm (it was when my internet started to be cheaper), till 12am (bc we both had to wake up early the next morning. Oh my god!!!!! Jajjajaja. One day I told him my real age (he thought I was 16), and then we lost contact. Ay! my first love,jajajaja. We never met. ANYWAY!! This all just to tell you that I failed 6/11 class subjects that the first trimester!! It was the first time I had failed ANY class! And ended failing the whole year 🤦🏻‍♀️. So, good for me to not have had an iPhone back then,jajajaja.

Yes me too. With some of the shirts from Harry’s merch I feel like they didn’t even try. Lyrics with a font that looks like Times New Roman… Really? And yes. They are expensive. You haven’t decided it yet? Do they usually have the same things that in the web? Do they have more As you see, im not very versed in merchandising or concerts. Enlighten me pls. (I must say, i’m loving the Honey updates). (5).

I don’t even know what/where/IF they sell merch at Niall’s concert. I would think they do, but 🤷🏻‍♀️. I think I’d buy a shirt. I have the shirt Steve sold for JHO (all black, with Louis and Steve’s silhouettes on the breast, and  just hod on written in the back); and the shirt of Harry’s concert. So I’ll like to have one for each of the boys. I’ll see.jejeje.

Yes, it makes perfect sense. I totally get it. When I first heard OMO I thought “lol, me”. And when i heard Mirrors i though “not so lol. Me too”. I was so touched when he explained what was the reason that made him wrote Mirrors. He is too pure. We are so lucky to have him. After hearing your story i can assure you; i’m never going to get a lip ring. Never. Do you still have it to this day? 9 ear piercings? I still have to find the energy to go and get a 2nd one. (6)

One of the things I’m loving about the hiatus, it’s my new love for Niall. When I first knew the band I thought: I can understand why people like all the boys, but Niall? What’s is there to like??? And oh girl, was I wrong! In my humble opinion, he’s the one who’s having the best solo career. Not based in awards or anything like that ( I don’t think successfulness is marked with that). But I don’t know, he’s making a name for him. He had it so “difficult”. Because when people heard his name, they didn’t put a face or a gossip story behind it. But step by step his making himself known, and I’m very proud. And I love his music. And I love to hear him talking in interviews. And those work out sessions are paying off, ajajajajajjaaajsj. So, all my respect to him. (To te rest too, eh 😜)9 ear piercing plus the ones you “get born” with!!! Jajaja. Those were the 00s,jajjajaja.

Well, they cant be much cheaper than now, right? Bcs now we have to pay for separate tickets. That way would be just 1. Let’s see. They would play all of their songs from Four. Almost all of the tracks from Made in the AM and MM. Compulsorily. But i let them have creative license choosing which songs from UAN & TMH they want to play. Im no dictator. What about you? What would you choose? A camera? Which kind of camera? I’m sure you’ll use it again. There’s plenty of occasions, trips & so. (6)

See? I was very sleepy, I didn’t thought about that. It would be just one ticket, not four like now. I seriously hate them. They only want me for my money 😡😡😂😂😂😂. My setlist would have to have! Over Again (indispensable), Four’s songs, MITAM’s songs, solo’s songs. Also, the stage would be small, so they had to talk with each other and walk around each other. And I don’t know, I just want them back together, jajajja. The camera I bought is the LUMIX TZ70. I saw someone has posted videos of Harry’s concert from very far away, but it was only his face. Like it had a big BIG zoom. And I went to their IG, and they had the name of their camera as a bio,jajaja, bc people asked them too much. So I looked it up in Amazon. And I bought it. Mymy. Now I only have to go on trips and those things to use it…😅.

Right direction? What a responsibility. Idk. All that topics are really related to what im studying, so i just learn about it in class, and then, outside the classroom, i read as many articles and books as i can. I just read whatever seems interesting to me. Sorry i’m useless. What i wanted to say is that im no expert on any of that subjects, but i find them interesting. Thats all. (Your mom cant recognise Liam? Im surprised bcs Liam has quite a distinctive voice, at least to me). (7)

I think it is interesting. I’d love to know a lot more. I just like to learn new things. And I love when people tell and explain me things when I’ve said something wrong. So, that’s what I meant, jejej, that if I ever say something wrong, feel free to call me out on it, please.I don’t know why she can’t recognize his voice!! She just says: it’s not this or that, so it has to be him,jajajaa. (I need your opinion on zayn and j Bieber, before I go on with this,jajaja).

JAJAJAJ. Sadly i get too many “hmmm, if you want…” with my friends. And they are usually followed by “You all are crazy”. But yeah, whatever. I’m living my truth. I’ll definitely come and talk to you. Dont worry. (8),

Yes please!! You’re always welcomed here with every wild thought you have!! Jajja. I’ll do the same. I’ll write tags post to you whenever I have something to tell you, jajajaja. Now, I’m gonna check my inbox again, to make sure I had t left any ask without  answer. You sent 12 asks today?? You’re amazing!! Thanks!! Ayayayay!!! I have to talk to you about a fic I’m reading. I haven’t finish it yet, but girl! It’s one of those I’ve had to stop reading bc it was to cute!!! I have even hugged my iPad  because I couldn’t hug Louis,jajaja. Do you read fics?? If that… lets talk, jajajajajja.Last, Honey came to say hello a while back. Their cousins (my sister’s dog) is spending the weekend here with them, because my sister is on a trip, so it will be an eventful weekend, I’m sure, jajajaja.Byeeeee Love!!! ❤️❤️❤️

Pd: answering to the last thing you said yesterday :) LOU IS BACK!!! But how predictable that was!!! Jajajja. Even I said we would see him now that Harry was  a world away. Anyway, I love seeing his face. Can’t wait for what it’s to come!! Bring it!! Jajajja