#send all my love to him
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(づ ᴗ _ᴗ)づ♡
#btsgif#dailybts#btsedit#yoongiedit#min yoongi#suga#bts#gif#if u think not every little moment needs to be giffed u r wrong#send all my love to him
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old doodles from the archives 🫶
#love u all#🤍🤍🤍#ml#miraculous#miraculous ladybug#my art#i don’t think i’ve posted any of these before#some of them are old old#the shrek one is from an old convo with peach:)#i don’t rly feel like tagging every character lol#oh and the marinette teaching everyone to draw one was inspired by a kit connor interview#where he was told to write his name on his picture and he autographed it#and the rest of the cast made fun of him for it#very adrien. to me:)#sending all my love🤍
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dont got much to offer for The Holiday but have these sillies!
happy valentines day :D
#sxf#spy x family#damianya#damian desmond#anya forger#my art#i am sleepy rn im scheduling this ahead of time like several hours ahead JKSDFKLS#unrelated to sxf. the tags are my speaking place shush#was not expecting the toby fox newsletter to have so much for me to think about JKKLDFSS#good ole gaster sending us love letters (we don't KNOW it's gaster but like. typing pattern + him being the only character to be like)#(directly referring to the game as deltarune)#ALSO THE WEATHERMEN HAVE NAMES NOW ?!?!? AND ARE IN LOVE ???!?!#so happy for them fr#i didnt get the mettaton card but like just know. that is my essence. all those blingee-core sparkles. those picmix hearts. me#anyway YIPPEE WAHOO
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the easy grip on the knife. the leg over the seat. the hand over the other seat. the sassy "come get it" move. you know the bitch is smiling behind that mask even as he said the line.
#i can't believe i'm saying this#DEADPOOL CAN GET IT#Logan I'm sobbing I understand why you lunged at him#I would too bestie#it's the sass for me folks#paint that car white as much as they painted it red my god#a deadpool thirst post? from me? more likely than you'd think#this is a branch in realities i know it#i've never had Feelings for this motherfucker until this movie#all i'm left with is anger now because WHAT DOES HE WANT FROM ME#camera crew could have just made it landscape but noooooo they had to do a medium shot of this son of a bitch#i'm sending an especially affectionate fuck you in ryan reynolds' direction#i love how you love deadpool#deadpool#wolverine#deadpool and wolverine#wade wilson#logan howlett#poolverine#deadclaws#don't get me wrong i've always adored deadpool's personality. nobody's that hilarious and not have humongous balls i mean trauma.#but i've never went 'why he kinda' until this specific shot right here#@ camera crew why the fuck did you zoom in? WHY?#for me? well it's infuriating#do it again#gif is credit to the owner#30 tags aren't enough for me to dismantle how this shot made me feel. tumblr you gotta update#damn tumblr i'm tryna feed a village here#guys just find my other post
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was this anyone else's first thought, or
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#anglerfish#YES hiking jade let's GO#send him up the mountain to look at some funky mushrooms#love how delicately he's holding his lantern with his little pinky out#ooh la la monsieur mastermind#now what are the odds we're getting gargoyle-club malleus next#probably not good but LOOK let me DREAM#i also very much want the equestrian club. GIVE ME HORSE BOYS#actually just give me everyone i want to see everyone#man though the june schedule looking pretty light over here in jp#which always makes me think something big is coming up...#whenever they pull a training camp on us it instantly sends my brain into overthinking mode#chances are good it's more main story though!#we've been averaging every-other-month story updates for a while now and the consistency is nice#i'm still not over the eight months between the end of episode 5 and the start of episode 6...#(IT'S FINE i want them to take all the time they need! i am just impatient)#(i will happily wait but i will be rolling around on the ground the entire time)
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in awe of the beauty of the world
#art#tes#skyrim#sort of anyways. hes from skyrim so that is how i will classify what is going on here#teldryn sero#tes fanart#i fucking love this guy#sidetracked my quests to give him a walking tour of skyrim after his deeply endearing reaction to the college of winterhold#as someone who never used companions in all my years of playing this game i was thrilled to learn everyone likes this guy as much as i do#also he gets extra points because chitin and netch armors have my heart#the goggles send me joyous places#anyways the state of my sketchbook ever since i descended back into my tes fixation is pretty catastrophic#what with the amount of vivec happening. so look forward to that at some point i guess#ash yams.. hackle-lo.. goggles.. kwama egg.. sujamma.. cup... we are making tinctures tonight
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JIN HUGS JIN HUGS! for @jinstronaut ♡
cr. namuspromised, dwellingsouls, 0613data
#btsgif#dailybts#btsedit#seokjin#bts#bangtan#usersky#usersan#userkelli#usermaggie#raplineuser#usersevn#tuserandi#userpat#userines#*sj#*bangtan#*comp#*gifs#em I have no idea in which timezone you are so I'm just gonna let this post at midnight my time asdgh#HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABY!!!!!!! I hope you'll have theeee bestest of days today my love you deserve it like no one else#I mean you've literally gifted us 500+ jin sets over the past 18 months -#this seems like the smallest thank you in return#you asked if someone could send you jinnie hugs so here I am!!!#if I could I'd fly to korea grab that man under his gigantic shoulders and bring him directly to your doorstep for the biggest bday hug#but for now this little set will have to do!#it gave me so much happiness just look at all the smiles with those big hugs :( and ofc I had to start and end it with jinkook <33#I love you lots emmeline thank you for being an amazing person all the time#you deserve so much appreciation and love and I hope you get showered with just that#not only today but all the time <3
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SILVER BLAZE PART THREE - happy jonkday everyone. one of these days i'll draw a scene that doesn't take place at night
#sherlock & co#sherlock and co#love when they quote acd holmes#a couple notes: i think i probably made sherlock more excitable than he actually is in this scene#its my opinion that he smiles more than we're giving him credit for but mostly i just needed to make the comic dynamic#and the thought of sherlock excitedly shaking watson was rly funny so. i did that. creative freedom#2. love that u can hear him stimming here i love him so muchhhh#3. the implication that sherlock sat and watched 6 hours. SIX HOURS of totally silent footage#and thought to himself 'hm...that was a bit quiet. TOO quiet...better wake my podcaster'#SENDS me#4. what on earth happens after this scene. does he just leave without elaborating.#anyway theyre fun to draw so thats overriding my sense that im being really annoying rn#im sooo sorry ;0;#5. yeah john has it all. freckles. stretch makes. body hair. scars. mwah#patsart
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#apple fun fact: i miss you :(#this is what I'd ironically post in my group too#i will drop everything for ringo and rush to his aid to love him all night if he send me this#but that's just me#the beatles#ringo starr#john lennon#paul mccartney#george harrison#beatles#memes
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light of my life 🤍 for @kimtaegis [cr. namuspromised]
#jimin#park jimin#pjm#bts#btsedit#btsgif#gif#jiminedit#pjmdaily#userkelli#usersky#annietrack#userdimple#raplineuser#rjshope#tuserandi#useremmeline#usermaggie#dailybts#he makes me feel so much better just to look at his pretty face#he has healing powers 🥺 angel baby i love him so#hi annie <3 i was thinking about you while making these 💌 hope you are doing well my love. sending you all the good wishes!
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WHAT IS UP WITH THE HOGWARTS LEGACY FANDOM?????????????
I am so fucking fed up with this fandom & honestly it makes me lose any desire to post anything here anymore.
So many people here look at EVERYTHING as a damn competition and it’s NOT. It should be a place for people to brainrot together, talk about theories, and enjoy seeing what other people draw and write etc. Have I sometimes felt insecure bc I don’t get as many notes as other people?! Yes of course…but I always focus on the connections and the lovely people I’ve met and like talking to bc that’s why I post in the first place. I didn’t spend 4 months posting my fic to 10 kudos and 1 comment with basically no feedback bc I care about popularity😆😆
I’ve never been part of a fandom before this one but honestly everything feels so immature here, especially lately. Is it NORMAL to send hate to people who interpret the characters differently than you?! Or send hate to people who ship something you don’t like???? Is it NORMAL to start a confessions blog that’s for people to vague post about others & give everyone reading it anxiety??? (And NO, it’s not “leveling the playing field” wtf). Is it NORMAL to be so close minded, that you’re always trying to start shit with other people?!!??
It is SO FUCKING EXHAUSTING & honestly I try my hardest to NOT feed into any negativity and I’ve never posted the hate I’ve gotten because quite frankly, it’s ridiculous.
I genuinely love seeing what all of you post and always try to comment when I have the mental energy, because I love having a sense of community and you’re all very talented.
#also if anyone is in contact with asallowgrave please tell him#I have a gigantic monster comment I was about to post when I found out he deleted everything😭😭😭😭😭😭#genuinely the best writer I came across in FOREVER & it makes me so sad#anyways most of you are absolutely lovely & I love that I’ve met you and that we talk#but some of you need a huge check on your attitude#like wtf is up with all of this#hogwarts legacy#hogwarts legacy fandom#sorry this is incoherent probably but like#I woke up and I saw so much shit in my 10 min scrolling this morning#and this isn’t about anyone in particular bc I don’t know who’s sending and spreading all of this hate#this is supposed to be a fun space for a hobby damn
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Yeonjun about the strain he felt while preparing for his debut solo project ✙ "GGUM" MAKING FILM
#yeonjun#choi yeonjun#tomorrow x together#txt#ggum: making film#gifs#creations#userzaynab#useryeonbins#skyehi#rosieblr#megtag#hibiebear#heyiri#ultkpopnetwork#kpopccc#kpopco#this are like the rawest emotions we've seen from him... I feel... it's really sad to watch him like this#i mean I know they're under lots of pressure and stress#It's only natural when you work with so many people who you could potentially disappoint#and I know it was his choice to make this solo project happen now but i feel like the company could manage his schedule better#because why he films till 3 am and then right next day has a flight to another country for a concert...#and now we know from soobin they're super busy again#I'm worried his body will just say 'enough' one day and something bad will happen :(#and you have him work so hard and stress and then all this losers online whose biggest achievement is getting 100 likes on a post#writing the worst things about him for no reason... its not that hard to be kind and you dont need to have an opinion about everything :D#at the end of the day that celebrity you hate so much is still pretty and successful#and you're just a friendless jobless empty-headed rotten fool with likes on a post that mean nothing once you close the ap#I'm just glad all this is still fun for him and that he has such a great support system: his members family staff who care about him and us#all we can really do is support them and send them lots of love fr ;; you've done well my jjunie ily ♥
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yall ever think Shen Yuan went through like, internet withdrawal after being transmigrated into Shen Qingqiu? Like, he's canonically a NEET shut-in who did nothing but spend his time online, you can't tell me that for the first week or first few weeks of being SQQ he wasn't twitchy.
Like, reaching instinctively to his pockets for a phone that wasn't there, having an obsessive itch in the back of his mind that he should check and see if X or Y novel or webcomic has updated -- only to realize he can't anymore and being irritated by it. Wanting to go and see if there's new posts about this or that, but again realizing that he can't.
When he's bored or uncomfortable or just feels like wanting to escape he tries to go for his phone to distract himself, but oops! Not there anymore, and now he has to find a new and different way to distract himself from his feelings. And going through system notifications, quests, etc only does so much.
And there's that Tetris Effect too. SQQ makes a mistake while writing and instinctively goes to backspace on it except hey-ho that's not a keyboard and now he just dipped his pinkie into a bottle of ink or on a still-drying letter.
With him scrambling to fix his reputation and learn how to be a peak lord, I think his abrupt cold-turkey from all things internet would just be another straw on the camel's back that he promptly Ignores until it goes away on its own after he acclimates to his new surroundings.
#svsss#mxtx svsss#scum villain#scum villian self saving system#shen yuan#shen qingqiu#i think him learning how to be a peak lord and cultivation and everything else would help distract him from the internet withdrawal for the#most part. but the moment there's a lull in the day and his mind wanders or he becomes bored or stressed and he instinctively reaches back#for his phone and realizes it isn't there it just sends a spike of panic/frustration/irritation through him because its a familiar comfort#and now its gone. like this is all based off my own experiences from being Chronically Online but i just think its neat to think about#in that same vein i think it also pushes him into getting into the arts on QJP. Like as the peak lord naturally he would be doing this kind#of stuff but hes NOT the peak lord but to keep up appearances he has to know how to do this stuff. and finds it??? actually quite rewarding#even more than getting into an argument online or getting a new merch item. he's making or doing this stuff. he starts drawing and finishes#a piece and regardless of its skill level he feels something unclog in his chest. like sediment being scraped off the bottom of a creek and#being washed downstream. a weight that's been slogging through his veins suddenly untangled. physical proof of his efforts that feels great#starry is incapable of NOT giving her favorite blorbos more hobbies. starry is incapable of not giving her favorites artsy hobbies#this is probably NOT a new or original thought whatsoever but im throwing it out there anyways bc it fascinates me. i love transmigration#and albeit i've only read isekai manhwa/manhua there's a common theme of the people there assimilating into their new lives relatively quic#which i know is for ease of transition and getting to the rest of the story. but WHAT IF.#i have still not read svsss yet and idk when i'll be able to BUT have some thoughts anyways
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top ten most gut wrenching heart breaking buckley siblings moments
#send post#buckley siblings#evan buckley#maddie han#the fact that he goes to therapy all by himself like no one's making him#i'm fine i just wanna be finer#we love to see the growth we love meaningful character development#but ''cause i always felt like you were sad too'' rips my heart out EVERY TIME#maddie begins when????? can we see it? can we see kid maddie?#what about maddie's fucked up childhood!!!!!#GOD
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After Angband, Maedhros had a complicated relationship with his hair for a long while. The thing he once used to cherish and carry with pride, inherited from the mother he had left behind, was now tainted with memories of unwanted attention and derogatory touch.
After his rescue, it had to be cut short for the sake of his recovery, and he could never quite figure out whether he was more hurt or relieved by the act. It was Fingon, during those times filled with anxiety and doubt and shame, who helped him learn to accept his own appearance again– from the stump of his right arm and the scars littered across his freckled body to the locks of copper hair, ever so slowly regrowing to their former glory.
And little by little, the lingering memories of malevolent hands harshly yanking at his scalp were replaced by the feeling of tender hands carefully braiding familiar golden ribbons into his hair, once again beloved.
#so basically#they are in love and i love them very much#just don't think about how during the peaceful days of valinor they used to spend days just sitting around and braiding each other's hair#and after his rescue maedhros could never do that again#or maybe curufin–#after seeing his brother moping around all day sad because he could no longer braid his bf's hair#–engineered his a prosthetic hand to help him do just that#who knows not me#fun fact i spent all day yesterday drawing this-- no literally i didn't do anything else please send help#the silmarillion#silmarillion#maedhros#nelyafinwe#maitimo#russandol#fingon#findekano#russingon#why do they have to have so many names my god#maedhros x fingon#fingon x maedhros#silmarillion fanart#russingon fanart#maedhros fanart#fingon fanart#idk what to tag here i'm gonna be honest#art#my art
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Sauron, Galadriel, & Tolkien's Theology of Repentance - Part One
Summary: Character meta analysis on Sauron (and Galadriel, through the lens of Sauron). Based on both Silmarillion & RoP canon. 3.5k words. Discussion of Catholic theology involved. Blanket TW for discussion of violence, manipulation, etc., because Sauron. Spoilers for S1 & S2 and the Silmarillion, of course. The tragedy of Sauron is that he gets offered so many legitimate chances at redemption and forgiveness, and he denies them every single time. But we know he wants absolution, because that’s what he sees Galadriel as: his chance to bind himself back to the light, to be Mairon again, to heal the pain that he caused and that was caused to him under Morgoth. But because he has such a warped view of himself and his actions, he dismisses genuine extensions of compassion, forgiveness, and care as simultaneously beneath him and too good for him. And yet, he still pursues redemption, but through none of the channels offered to him.
In The Rings of Power, he’s given the explicit instruction to change for the good in the village after he’s reborn. He’s given the chance leave his past behind and work meaningfully in Númenor. He’s given the chance to redeem himself by Galadriel's offer of friendship (or love, depending on your interpretation). In the Silmarillion, he's even given the chance by Eönwë himself, and comes close to leaving Morgoth behind completely!
Let's look at this passage from Of the Rings of Power and the Third Age (emphasis mine):
When Thangorodrim was broken and Morgoth overthrown, Sauron put on his fair hue again and did obeisance to Eönwë the herald of Manwë, and abjured all his evil deeds. And some hold that this was not at first falsely done, but that Sauron in truth repented, if only out of fear, being dismayed by the fall of Morgoth and the great wrath of the Lords of the West. But it was not in the power of Eönwë to pardon those of his own order, and he commanded Sauron to return to Aman and there receive the judgement of Manwë. Then Sauron was ashamed, and he was unwilling to return in humiliation to receive from the Valar a sentence, it might be, of long servitude in proof of his good faith; for under Morgoth his power had been great. Therefore when Eönwë departed he hid himself in Middle-earth; and he fell back into evil, for the bonds that Morgoth had laid upon him were very strong.
This passage is clear that Eönwë is willing to pardon Sauron--he simply did not posses the power to do so. But when Sauron was told he must appeal directly Manwë, he gave up entirely and skulked back to Middle-earth. There are a few ways to read this:
1. He was not wholly repentant
Sauron simply wanted the protection of a new master in the absence of Melkor. i.e., he was rather fickle and simply wanted to be on whatever the "winning" side was. This is supported by the text literally saying that at least some of his obeisance was completely false, and that he only made a point of feeling bad about anything once his master had been chucked into the Void and his armies and strongholds were being destroyed (Thangorodrim). In this reading, perhaps Eönwë saw Sauron's treachery and referred him to Manwë knowing that it would be a test of his true intent. However, while a valid interpretation, I believe this to be the less holistic of the two.
2. He was truly repentant
Sauron did truly feel badly and "abjured all his evil deeds," but he was unwilling/unable to humble himself after being so fundamentally broken by Melkor and developing an insatiable power lust (hey, he isn't defined in the narrative by lust and pride for nothing).
Earlier in this same chapter, Tolkien wrote that Sauron could "...deceive all but the most wary." This is in the specific context of his physical shapeshifting. But, I would argue that this can also be tied to his lies. Tolkien has a specific ethic of beauty, where physical perfection is equated with moral goodness. Sauron completely inverts what is otherwise a hard and fast rule within Tolkien's writings by being the character most frequently described as "fair"--seven times to Lúthien's six, and she was the most beautiful woman to have ever lived!
(Side note: I have another post on Tolkien & beauty in the works where I'll get more into this idea)
Why does this matter? Even though this interaction with Eönwë takes place in the First Age, Sauron could at this point be in the demonic form Mirdania describes in the forge. And, I am inclined to believe that Eönwë, as the head Maiar and herald of Manwë, would be a pretty wary guy, and thus able to sense any of Sauron's trickery. I read this to mean that Eönwë looked at Sauron and saw his potential to be Mairon again, either in absence of his evil form or in spite of it.
Because Sauron is incredibly beautiful. And even if it is a disguise of the true, depreciated form of his spiritual essence, he presented himself to Eönwë at his most beautiful. He wanted, even in his act of repentance, to make himself more favorable in Eönwë's eyes. To show up as Mairon (who was likely close friends with Eönwë before everything went down, since they are considered to be two of the most powerful Maia and would have worked closely together).
But I don't think this was all manipulation on Sauron's end. I agree with the scholars mentioned in the text who believed that Sauron was truly repentant--which is why Eönwë even bothered referring him to Manwë instead of kicking him into the Void with Melkor.
And this is the tragedy: Sauron is told exactly how to repent, and believes fundamentally that it is an impossible path for him. And yet, he still longs so intrinsically for it! He was, under Aulë, a Maia of precision, perfection, and order. Under Morgoth, he feels disordered, dis-regulated. He needs to correct the fundamental imbalance within him, so why does he flee Eönwë?
It comes back to Sauron's pride.
If he follows through with this path of reconciliation, there is no way he can hide or pretend his actions away. If he cannot trick his fellow Maiar, he certainly cannot trick the Valar. And he cannot stand the idea of submitting himself back under their rule, especially now that he has tasted power. This is a pride wound; it is why the idea of confessing to Manwë would be humiliating to him as opposed to just upsetting/uncomfortable.
Again, the pivotal moment: he is told how to make amends for crimes and determines that he cannot do it. So he returns to Middle-earth and stews in his own self-hated and self-pity for a few years. In that time, he consciously or subconsciously latches onto Eönwë's offer--forgiveness from penance. It is the way forward. And if he cannot earn penance at Manwë's hand, he will do it on his own.
The Prodigal Son
This is where we have to talk about the Catholic roots of Tolkien's work for a moment. The scene where Sauron approaches Eönwë mirrors the biblical parable of the prodigal son. In this story, a man abandons his family, spends all his money, and falls into ruin. But when he recognizes his failings and returns to his father to get help, he is welcomed back into the family without question--in other words, he is forgiven and restored to his former position.
17 But when he [the prodigal son] came to himself he said, “How many of my father’s hired hands have bread enough and to spare, but here I am dying of hunger! 18 I will get up and go to my father, and I will say to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you; 19 I am no longer worthy to be called your son; treat me like one of your hired hands.’” 20 So he set off and went to his father. But while he was still far off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion; he ran and put his arms around him and kissed him. - Luke 15:11-32, NRSV CE (emphasis mine)
The parallel is clear; Mairon, the repentant Maia, returns home with hopes of reconciliation. He is prescribed the same task that the prodigal son offered to his father: he must be bound in servitude to his father/creator in order to pay off his debts. This is a deliberate allusion from Tolkien. The story of the prodigal son models the path of reconciliation that Eönwë describes. Tolkien seems to be drawing a line in the sand with this: Sauron is unwilling to do the work required by the Valar for repentance, so he is unable to receive the grace of a warm welcome back into the fold of the Ainur. Since he did not humble himself, he has to be told to do it. And he does not want to! He wants to be loved, but he also wants his power--evidence, in a way, of how his character was fundamentally altered in his time with Morgoth.
His pride--and his fear--cut him off from the potential of grace. He does not know for certain that Manwë would subject him to servitude (though I would argue that it's textually evident that it is a custom), but this assumption leads him to flee, which allows him to slip back into his old ways.
He wants to be Mairon (admirable) again, not Sauron (abhorrent). He wants to be accepted and loved, but not punished. He wants the benefits of reconciliation without the work he would have to do to earn it or the shame he would feel as he did. It's pride, but it's also deep shame--the flip side of his extreme ego is an implicit self-hatred, one that we can see in the subtext of how he speaks about himself and about his time with Morgoth.
Even the language Tolkien uses is heavily shame-coded, especially in a Catholic context; Mairon did not go willingly, he was "seduced." He admits to Celebrimbor that he was "tortured by a god". It becomes exceedingly clear through both text and on-screen canon that Sauron was routinely broken and abused for centuries. This has fundamentally damaged his self-perception, which is ultimately what leads him to "[fall] back into evil"--whether due to pride or shame, he hides, perhaps because he consciously or subconsciously does not believe that he deserves forgiveness, no matter how much he craves it.
Naked in the Garden
His flight back to Middle-earth after meeting Eönwë is reminiscent of another biblical scene, where Adam and Eve, after committing the first sin, hide from God in shame and fear (emphasis mine):
7 Then the eyes of both were opened, and they knew that they were naked...9 But the Lord God called to the man, and said to him, “Where are you?” 10 He said, “I heard the sound of you in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked; and I hid myself.” -Genesis 7-10, NRSV CE
The image of nakedness is, here, one of vulnerability, and Tolkien establishes that Sauron fears that which he cannot control. He needs the Rings under his power. He needs his armies and his enemies under his watchful eye. He is petrified of letting his power slip away (possibly due to never wanting to feel powerless in the hands of a Vala, fallen or not, again).
The biblical allusion here hearkens back to the fear Tolkien describes Sauron as feeling regarding his return to the Ainur. In the religious system Tolkien has established, which is likely inspired by his own religious beliefs, Sauron has sinned, and must make penance. But he is afraid of God/Manwë, and does not want to "let go" of his sin. In other words, he is not truly repentant. This reflects the Catholic sacrament of confession, which requires self-reflection and resolve to never commit the sin again.
Instead of shame driving him to contrition, it drives him to isolation.
But he still wants forgiveness. So, in his years of hiding in Middle-earth, he decides to earn it himself. His own way.
Enter the Rings.
Sauron wants to perfect the wrong he wreaked so that he can both earn his way back into the Ainur and keep his power. But what he does not realize is that this does not work. Eönwë is clear that he must forsake his true temptation--absolute power--through penance by submission. Yet Sauron in his pride thinks he can have it all. Sauron is a very carefully controlled villain, and the only times he snaps or makes significant mistakes are when his inflated self-perception is challenged, revealing the self-loathing and/or self-pity underneath. The best example of this is when he kills Celebrimbor prematurely, and cries afterwards. Why? Because Celebrimbor was right about him, and he hates it. He hates knowing that he is nothing more than the Morgoth's shadow, because Morgoth was his master as much as he was his tormentor. As Sauron puts it, his relationship with Morgoth was often defined by pain as a test to see "whose will was the mightier":
This image carries more shame, both in its implicit sexual connotations and in the simple power dynamic of it. Sauron, even though misguided, is rallying against Morgoth. He wants to break what Morgoth has created and build something new, something better, something apart from his old master entirely. But Celebrimbor confronts him with reality: he has not created something new, and perfect, and special, as he so wanted to--he can only act in imitation, not in generation. And when he got close with the Rings, it cost him everything. It's almost like he wants the power of a Vala, and loathes that he cannot attain it.
And this is why he becomes so singularly obsessed with Galadriel.
She’s his foil. They both crave power and adoration, but in the end of things, she does not fold under his temptation. She turns down everything she has ever wanted for the greater good and for the sake of her own soul. Sauron looks at Galadriel and perceives that she would have succeeded at Eönwë's test because she is willing and able to humble herself. This maddens him to the point of both desiring her and desiring to break her.
She learns that she is easily tempted and becomes strong enough to handle it (through a lot of tough love from Elrond & co.). She has to learn how to do it, but she is able to.
She grows from someone who resisted and rejected authority to someone who is trusted as an authority because of her ability to wield it wisely (see: Gil-galad allowing her to answer for him in 2x08).
In other words, she earns the trust, love, and support of her community. Sauron has to force his to comply—it is an illusion of love.
His possessive obsession with her also stems from her fairness. She was the object of her uncle Fëanor's obsessive desire for creation as well. Her hair was the inspiration of the Silmarils (see: The History of Galadriel and Celeborn; The Shibboleth of Fëanor - source with page #s here), which Morgoth desired more than anything to possess.
Sauron, wanting to spite his master, wants one better--to own that which inspired the Silmarils, to own the image of fairness (and thus of moral good) completely. This is why he wants to bind himself to her. This is why he needs her. He sees Galadriel as his mechanism of repentance, and his last triumph over Morgoth. Winning her is his salvation as much as it is proving that his will is the mightier. It is his way of dominating Morgoth. This starts, I think, as a genuine effort at proving himself to the Valar, but quickly consumes him entirely. He is overcome with the desire for revenge, just as Galadriel was at the beginning of the First Age.
And he sees this in her. Sees their similarities. Sees that she, too, is angry and lonely and so afraid of losing her power. And he leverages that to befriend her. This is where it gets ambiguous and you can read RoP as either painting the image of Sauron being earnest but completely misguided in his proposal, or you can see it as him being entirely manipulative.
I think the truth of that scene probably falls somewhere in the middle; just like when he presents himself to Eönwë, he is sincere in his desire, but only knows how to present it in an inherently contriving way. He does want to bind her to him, so he tries to only reveal to her the good aspect of that desire (and also of his desire for power, which he allows her to see because he believes that it is good and also because she understands it), and not the ugly underside of his internal struggle against Morgoth, the Valar, and himself.
And I do think, in his own way, he cared about her. Galadriel consistently shows kindness and compassion to him. In S1, they grow to know each other's minds and souls, and she considers him a close friend. He finds comfort in this, that someone could see the blackness of his heart and care for him anyway. He thought, in his isolation, that he lost that chance when he fled back to Middle-earth. And here is the very picture of the light itself telling him that she supports him, that she sees the good in him, that she wants to help him set the world to rights! Of course he is infatuated by this. Of course he also wants to use it. He is Sauron.
But Galadriel succeeds where he fails, so he stops playing nice and tries to forcibly drag her down with him. First, by baiting her with the image of the man she cared deeply for:
Then, by reminding her of all she is losing by rejecting him:
And she is still strong enough to say no. And not just to say no, but to shut the door completely. To look in the face of everything she has desired for centuries and turn it down, understanding that it will ruin her. Yes, she hesitates. Yes, she still wants it (wants him). But she wins the day by holding fast to the light that Sauron wishes so badly to bind himself to.
Because she has lost everything--her brother, her husband, the station as commander, the trust of her high king and best friend--and earns it back only through her resistance of her greatest temptation. It is a struggle, it is painful, it nearly kills her--but she does it. She wins the test that Sauron could not even bear to face.
In their headlong, self-sacrificial tendencies, they are the same. Both view themselves as fundamentally stronger/better than their peers while also being deeply lonely due to their self-imposed isolation (Galadriel's laser-focused hunt for revenge, Sauron's exile in Middle-earth). But to Galadriel, the light is more important than her pride.
For Sauron, the light is his source of pride. He desires it more than anything, but condemns himself to never being able to touch it due to his rejection of Eönwë's offer. Paradoxically, he tries to grasp at it through Galadriel, the living silmaril, and succeeds only in darkening her. We learn from Gil-galad in 2x08 that his crown piercing her flesh in an act of brutal domination nearly strips her soul from her and pitches it into the unseen world. In this, Sauron is saying: If I cannot have you, I will force you to need me. I will break you into loving me.
He says this to Celebrimbor as well. He no longer knows how to love properly. He only knows how to inflict pain until this object of his obessive desire needs him--just like how his immortal spirit was broken into submission by Morgoth. And isn't this revealing of his own sense of self? He refuses to suffer the path of light, but willingly suffers the maddening path of darkness because it is a comfortable, familiar suffering. One, he tells Celebrimbor, he even grew to enjoy (2x08). As the path of the Rings drive him madder and madder, his desire for the light (Galadriel) and the return of his power (Celebrimbor) become further disordered and corrupted until they culminate in him destroying them--and his chance at earning/owning them--entirely.
And this is Sauron's ultimate point of no return (which we will hopefully see in S3 🤞). The razing of Eregion and slaying of Celebrimbor were acts of petty rage he committed when his pride was injured. This was the final nail in the coffin. Galadriel, in her rejection of him, ruins what he sees as his true chance for redemption.
Galadriel, now stepping into the role of Eönwë, re-opens the invitation: "Heal yourself!" (2x08). But in rage and shame and stubborn pride, he turns it down again. I believe this is where his desire to heal Middle-earth shifts fundamentally into desire to dominate Middle-earth. He always wanted to rule, but now he wants to own.
#fae speaks#I spent hours pouring thru the Silm and RoP for this so if you enjoyed please let me know I'd love love love to talk about it more <33#sauron is my favorite freak in all of tolkien's lore rn I want to study him like a bug#btw this is saurondriel (and even silvergifting? if u squint) positive but with loads of nuance. i see haladriel as love and saurondriel as#possession. both are fun in fiction of course but I want to acknowledge how deeply messed up the dynamic is#but also! it's fiction! do whatever you want with it! if you want saurondriel to get a happy ending then do it <3#and send me the fic so i can read it because i'm team half-maia celebrian hehe#also if there are any glaring gaps in my knowledge of the silm pls lemme know it's been a minute since i've read it all the way through#part two will be on beauty and evil in tolkien's cosmology :)#tolkien#the silmarillion#the rings of power#rings of power#trop#rop#sauron#halbrand#annatar#galadriel#sauron x galadriel#saurondriel#haladriel#trop spoilers#trop season 2#trop meta#rop meta#rop theory#trop theory#celebrimbor#my metas
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