#self-motivation isn't about rejecting connection

[anneapocalypse]

Tired of the false dichotomy between "you should create for yourself without desiring any form of connection" and "feedback is everything and without it there's no reason to create." Neither of these things are wholly true, and it's frustrating to me that people have taken "create for yourself" to mean "you shouldn't want feedback or enjoy it, you should create in a vacuum with no hope of human connection" and are lashing back against what they think it's saying rather than what it's actually saying. I love comments and feedback and connecting with my readers as much as anyone and would never discount the value of that experience and I try to be the kind of engaged reader I would want to have because I know how much it means. I especially know how much it means to a niche creator because I've been that creator myself and I so treasure the readers who took a chance, gave my stuff a try, and stopped to say something supportive about it.

But that's also exactly the thing: the things I want to write are often things that do not in any way guarantee me an audience, but they're what I enjoy, and creating for myself is what gets me through those long first drafts where I know there is no guarantee of an audience because the reality is I'm choosing to write this thing and nobody owes me a readership. Internal motivation matters because there are parts of the creative process where internal motivation is all you have. I've seen people give up or nearly give up on projects that probably would have found an audience, if a niche one, because they convinced themselves that nobody would care and then couldn't motivate themselves to care. Or they decided that a small audience wasn't good enough; they need their work to be Popular or it was worth nothing.

And if someone doesn't want to invest themselves in creating something that might have a small audience, well, that's their choice. But creativity is inherently an act of risk, and a lot of amazing art would never be made if the creator wasn't willing to risk silence, rejection, loneliness. Yeah, those things suck. I'm not saying they don't, that's why it's a risk. But art isn't always about safety. Sometimes it's about creating because you simply have to get this thing out of your head, and you hope someone will connect with it, but you don't know until you try. So everything can't be external motivation. It just can't be. It's too limiting, it's too stifling. I can't live that way, personally.

[azure-cherie]

|𝑃𝐿𝑈𝑇𝑂 𝐴𝑆𝑃𝐸𝐶𝑇𝑆 |

What does Pluto represent?

It represents regeneration, metamorphosis, to change and become into something new , it represents innermost feelings, what have you discarded, thrown locked away , it can show where your blockages might be , and acknowledging them and healing them will lead you to embody yourself more , the core step of regeneration is acception so accept yourself for all the darks and lights and greys they will show you your own soul beautiful, empowering, unfearful.

This post is based on what's observed if it doesn't resonate please check other placements 🌷 This post can be read for tropical as well as vedic astrology however in vedic the outer planets don't matter as much .

Tw : I have tried to be honest and some stuff can be triggering please know that these are general observations

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Sun 🌞

Conjunct: These people go through a lot early on , like rejections, rumours that their kindness is fake , as they get older they get famous for a new look of theirs for example, someone maybe known for being a chocolate boy when younger but they age like fine wine as they get older , they like to take major risks in life . Their energy stays hidden from people who don't appreciate it in a way they will only embody their true self when they're truely appreciated . Their inner child is oftentimes locked and can be accessed and healed through breathing exercises, sunbathing, helping out poor children or lost souls.

Trine : They are known mostly for having a profound balance in what they do , like a beauty with brains type of vibe , they get famous for things they do authentically , are you ready to show yourself to the world if yes it will take you for all that you got , now you choose . A good placement for bombshell beauties , they are known for their unique looks eg : Angelina jolie, grace kelly , really revolutionary.

Sextile: They have a very experimental fashion and with every look of theirs , their outlook towards life changes , change in styles give them growth . Might be kind of control freaks and perfectionists but they actually work best in chaos and unpredictability gains a lot for them. Men with this are known to be very brave and powerful. People with this take challenges and criticism very well and use it to their advantage .let go of the mentality that society will only love you when you have all of the best things , infact the people who love you will love you regardless.

Square: These people literally have cults , their views are so strong that only people who really want to believe and deal take them , they will throw your triggers at your face. Believers of tough love , they might be a little too misunderstood, it takes time for people to get through their layers . You may think , here finally i know this person, but you'll be shocked about how much more they have to offer .

Opposite: These people have a lot of internal struggles , they often choose the wrong people to trust , fame isn't the best thing for them , a quite luxurious happy life is something they are content with . They have a very sophisticated face , they have a look of I'm satisfied but watch me do more kinda face . They are often famous for their aesthetic choices . Tw : fame may lead to early death , unless they learn to navigate it .

Moon 🌙

Conjunct: People have too many views about them and their mental health, they may suffer from a lot but you don't have to remind them , they already know and are working. They have a great spectrum of emotions and can be well known for writing their innermost thoughts. Intuitive and good at channeling and connected to their daimon. Divine inspiration always leads them . They have a very enticing and captivating face . Sometimes their speech is confusing, but they are trying to do good for you , might be a little rough at times.

Trine : They are intellectual and can provide anyone with sufficient motivation to do something. Good at telepathy and communication. They hold the power to influence people for good and bad . Have an easy navigation about their emotions. Some people might hate or be jealous because of how well they can navigate their triggers.

Sextile: They are soft and pure hearted , oftentimes known for their activism and support all the people around them with open hearts , it's a good placement for psychologists . They are known to persist despite all the hurdles around them . They like punk rock , and like to speak on dark topics for the welfare of society . Liked by many because of their authenticity .

Square : They like to mainly stay away from social media , as too much presence leads to people building wrong assumptions about them . They have revolutionary and conflicting views about things . These people regret not taking the right action at the right time . Can turn out to be manipulative and self sabotaging .

Opposite: They can be narcissistic, too absorbed. Though they introduce new trails of ideas , their speech is oftentimes too extreme and unacceptable. They are well known for their work . Known for their sad personality they feel things really deeply and are often confused about their own emotions. They have deep voices. People can really relate to their cries for help , they just need to have peace with themselves, and know that not everything shouldn't be known by everyone.

Mars ♦️

Conjunct : makes one a visionary for change , sometimes destruction. They have violent control of their emotions. Feels isolated initially which they turn into super power and channel it through their art and daily life . They can give great advice on just about anything, people trust them but also fear them .

Trine : hates to be ignored , when someone disregards them they get in moods of ignorance . Likes attention. They attract men who are a bit passive aggressive. Good at calisthenics , a lot of people consider their body to be a piece of art . Prone to knee injuries.

Sextile : common placement for royalty and fame after marriage ( rich powerful men ) . The people with this placement need to learn to love themselves, can be too fixated on others to love them which in turn creates a void, when they are developed , they enjoy themselves a lot , a very nice business mind and can give a good sense of life and the game of it . Lowkey reminds me of Shera .

Square : They like boyish clothing, can be stuck in scandals for example : Mila kunis for her age, courtney for the m*****r of Kurt, Kristin Stewart for cheating . They have a great sense of confidence , people try to copy them a lot . Usually they are trend setters in rare sectors . They tend to have a pull for life and the purpose of it but are confused often .

Opposite: Gives one strong sense of justice , however at times it could bounce back on them , for example they raised their voice against some injustice, it indeed hampers their image . Being a mediator is a peaceful case for them but if they choose to go for their heart that is true, they experience turbulence , initially until they realise life is all about give and take . Might give you a square face and lean body .

Venus 🦪

Conjunct : god knows you know about the deadly charm they exude , when Venus is conjunct pluto every step that you take towards healing and facing that is coming towards you , you are blessed in beauty ( how don't ask me try ) you become so self assured and so much more confident, they also have an air of knowing a lot even though they are still learning holy shit the grasp they have upon us .

Trine : These people can really turn their hurt into their power , they strive to get something in life, they know that whatever happens they can get out of it, so beautifully reminds me of the phoenix , rise like a beautiful song .

Sextile : you're intense you're full of depth and beauty, they have deep philosophical and in the core know that money cant buy all happiness but it's essential for their survival, they know how to strike a balance in life and really are the masters of their own fate

Square : Venus and Pluto forming squares gives one a drastic drive to be their authentic self to accept themselves in all their forms be it good bad or weird they aren't afraid to go through the little deaths in the self discovery of finding themselves again and again . They have many aha moments as they are always learning something new about themselves.

Opposite: this placement could bring internal struggles about looks and money , they think they can't manifest money but it's already written, these placements agree for you to accept them and work with them for your benefit. However this could also lead to them having a god complex and a feeling that they can do no wrong .

Jupiter ✨

Conjunct : These people are one of a kind very wise and you know those kinda people who give great advice because they have f*****d up in real time so with all they have gone through they try to live the best lives for themselves and everyone around them , these people are also very lucky in gambling, lottery and stock market .

Trine : blessed in marriage and business with people who see themselves in their true aura and still choose to love them. These people are dominating and they know what they want , don't like people correcting them too much.

Sextile : with a trine in this position one might go through this thing of being bad or fluctuating with money , once you have a lot other time you're blaming yourself for spending too much but be assured that no matter what , what you lose you will earn it back again too . They like to help the oppressed and the outcast .

Square : when in square you really go through the challenging times , the key to why you're great is because you can always self discover yourself again that's why the people around you see you in such a light of a leader , you're like a hierophant to the lost people because you found yourself again .

Opposite: you might feel unlucky that your luck doesn't work in your favour but her we talk about the solution so the thing is you're meant to work alright this pretty much like working on a child , you have to love your inner child so much so truly . you work hard for the benefits they work a little late but they def work c'mon it's with jupiter ain't no way jup ain't blessing you.

Mercury 🖊️

Conjunct: they know that the emotions they have good or bad are a result of innermost issues , very aware of their problems and solutions . Makes one a very good person to go for advice . Good in the logical sector , they like to chill or spend time reading stuff. They study or seek mental stimulation in times of distress

Trine : they can bring out their innermost desires easily through art and literature, healing when it comes to skin is fast for them , their brains work in a very result oriented manner , they think about the consequences and possibilities before doing something drastic . Makes one a lover of fiction of all kinds .

Sextile : They really find inspiration in the things most people don't see . They pay attention to the things most people ignore and find a way to use it to get a hold of information. These are the people with a variety of information in all sectors ,though conjunction and trine gives the intelligence, they choose to restore more as a built mechanism to enchant people

Square: this gives a hard time accepting this for what they truly are might lead to some anxiety and adhd issues , this could make one scared of changes . Early age bullying could be seen but with time , the youth of mercury and the resilience of Pluto makes one a visionary, someone who knows so much.

Opposite: might have a hard time to channel logic , though their emotions are alright . Might fall for fake promises and they have to work on their people pleasing tendencies. This gives one a hunger to do better in life , eventually they see that all that their mind is feeding them isn't true and they can always do better than what they have been taught .

Saturn 🪐

Conjunct :makes one a very disciplined person , they strive to work hard . You know the lana lyric " I'm doing it for all of us who never got the chance , and all my birds of Paradise " like wise they work hard so everyone around them can be happy and healthy, they make great people to bond with if you wanna succed in life and are looking for like minded people.

Trine : they are very hardworking towards what they want very goal oriented people. One thing i have seen is they can never work unless their work space is really clean , an organised view of things make their mind work better . People see them as someone who can be stiff at times , you can sometimes let loose is alright and appreciated to enjoy life .

Sextile : This works kind of like Saturn retrograde, the initial obstacles remain while Saturn gives the bad later in life when one has proven worthy to have something . Since life has thrown away them a lot of times they learn to be really humble , and try to assess all the possibilities before being sad about something. They understand that life is what you make it.

Square : might have a hard time following routines , they blame their luck a lot for having problems . When they get into healing themselves they have to deal with a lot of intense inner conflict and they might not take it very well , however to have a strong mind one has to deal with this tw might fall into depression. They come out stronger than ever knowing the power of free will .

Opposition: they believe rules are meant to be broken and i believe though this is opposition and might be malefic but being with Saturn and Pluto this gives one a very idgaf mentality which it turns out good for most times as one doesn't spend too much time contemplating. Might ignore their problems at times . But once in life the urge to get their life on track will occur and they will set things right for themselves. They want what they want by hook or by crook .

Uranus 🪻

Conjunct : They orchestrate changes, they are potent in telling people why they should do some things and why some things will bring them the better , they can really motivate people to live life for themselves. Usually they have strong sense of justice and remain very grounded .

Trine : They are free spirited, charming people , one thing about them is they can really see what others don't they can really put up the themes regarding what's beautiful and what's ugly and bring it to the world , work really hard to bring about equality in the society .

Sextile : This is a placement for the psychics healers and mystical beings , they learn that their position in the world is to heal and through their consistent efforts they heal themselves as well as others . They might find themselves in a state of dilemma sometimes as they are always energized with new ideas , they learn to channel it eventually.

Square : people with this can be a little stiff and scared about changes , they want things to be the same but to realise life's all about changes and how good one does to cope with it . These people are also very good at keep people on their toes. They guide themselves back to themselves. With this placement you don't loose your sense of self.

Opposite: A lot of people have their eyes on them and every move they make so they feel anxious and try to avoid changes . This placement can make one a control freak but if you choose to have faith in yourself and flow sometimes in life you will see the beauty of things that aren't forced , changes are necessary, cultivate the courage it requires to change .

Neptune 🌀

Conjunct : makes one a good artist , bestows beauty , other worldliness . Your dreams make so much impact in you daily life . Manifestation is your power you make it work for you all the damn time . It could bestow good healing powers and career in the therapy sector of all kinds. And this gives so much mystery to people.

Trine : They find very creative ways to channel their energy, might make one a bit lazy . They can work their emotions in a very creative way and achieve great things in life on the basis of their belief systems . Also good at predictions and reiki and astrology.

Sextile : These people are always full of surprises they have so much to give to the world , often they can come off as delusional but eventually they prove everyone wrong by getting all they want . However to warn the laziness if given a chance to grow will grow, so avoid it and go make the life you deserve

Square :. They have bizarre dreams , they aspire for a dreamland and seek ways to make the world a paradise , this in positive sense as they work hard to do things their way . Their homes are always so pretty and decorated . They can make anyone relax and calm down from the chaos . To truly grow in life they have to move with wisdom and have to accept all changes and chances with bravery.

Opposite : tw , this could lead to some sort of depression, addiction or inner conflicts , they seem and feel lonely or left out , they are great artists but their minds might be a little dark place to be in . To channel this energy properly is one great thing to live with the darkness and transmute it into light is great . Be sure of what you want and never ever bow down to what is trying to bring you down

I hope you enjoyed reading this post 🫂thank you so much, please consider reblogs and feedback it helps .

Suggestions for any post are open through the ask box

Have a great day/ night 😚

[bookshelfdreams]

There were two great posts about Izzy yesterday, and I would like to expand on and add my 2 ct to the things said in them a little. One, by @celluloidbroomcloset (with additions by several others), about how Izzy immediately falls back into old patterns of manipulative behaviour after his supposed redemption in 02x07, only this time with Stede as the focus of said behaviours instead of Ed. The other, by @batsarebetterthanpeople, about how Izzy's behaviour in 02x06 and onward is more akin to the development a homophobe coming around to a queer loved one, than an arc of queer self-discovery.

Izzy's story isn't about himself. I think this is the first, fundamental mistake people make when engaging with it. He's not a protagonist; he doesn't exist in the story for his own sake. So when ofmd asks "How to reform a toxic person? What does it look like and is it even possible?", the starting point isn't one of empathy with Izzy.

It's one of empathy with Ed. ofmd is asking these questions not because it wants to understand Izzy better. What it wants to explore is the possibility of Ed having the relationship with Izzy Ed wants. Whether Izzy can be brought around to understanding Ed's wants and needs, whether he can understand the hurt he caused him.

This is a fundamentally different approach to how these stories are usually told. Usually, we start out with the unspoken assumption that the toxic person is well-intentioned, good at heart, and whatever pain they caused our protagonist is more akin to a misunderstanding than deliberate harm. Yes, they may have have caused hurt, but if you just see things from their perspective, you'll understand that they only had your best interest in mind, and that will enable you to forgive them.

Obviously this can't not veer off into victim blaming. "The abuser had a good reason for what they did, and therefore, it's your own fault. Or at the very least not theirs."

ofmd fundamentally rejects this. It is very careful to never let the bullies and abusers have a valid point. Abusers are abusive because they get something out of it. To truly reform an abuser, they would have to be willing to build a life for themselves that is a lot less comfortable. Where they have to consider other's feelings, communicate and compromise, meet other people on equal footing, instead of putting themselves in a position of authority. It means letting go of patterns of behaviour that they have so far been quite successful with*.

And Izzy - tries. He is interesting because part of him clearly wants to leave the toxicity behind. He gets to see what positive relationships, human connection, being part of a community look like; he's offered an outstretched hand, and, after biting it a few times, tentatively starts to take it.

But he can't quite get there. The temptation to fall back into what he knows is too strong. celluloidbroomcloset's post linked above talks mainly about 02x07, so I'm not gonna repeat all that, but I'm going to add two little scenes from 02x06 that further cement this. In the beginning of the episode, Izzy finds Ed as he's standing on deck, watching the sea, and the conversation that plays out is a clear mirror to, almost repeat of the Frankfurter clouds scene from 01x04. Ed tries to share an observation with Izzy in an attempt to reach out to him ("Something's wrong. Feels like a storm's coming but I can't see it."), which Izzy, of course, immediately dismisses ("Or maybe you're just a mopey twat and there is no fucking storm").

The second scene is, when Izzy is the only one discouraging Ed from following Stede to his cabin after he kills Ned Lowe. Discouraging support, discouraging connection and emotional honesty; Izzy will continue to try to isolate Stede.

Now, I do not think this, or the things happening in 02x07, are put in there deliberately to show that Izzy has ulterior motives. Rather, they are an illustration of how deep these maladaptive patterns of behaviour go. Izzy isn't able to fully admit to himself the extend of the harm he caused and this is what prevents him from truly changing his behaviour - even when he has just experienced the benefits of a loving, supportive community!

All of this is the explanation to the answer the show gives to our starting question: Is it possible for Ed to have the relationship with Izzy that Ed wants? And the answer is: No. Just because growth is possible, doesn't mean it is enough. Doesn't mean anyone's entitled to forgiveness. Sometimes, the only compassionate thing to do, is to take yourself permanently out of the other person's life.

But Izzy did learn, and he did grow. It's just that the purpose of said growth wasn't to heal him; it was to enable him to understand the hurt he caused to Ed. That doesn't have to mean people like Izzy can never be reformed, it just means that this isn't a story about the reformation of a toxic person. It's the story of leaving this toxicity behind.

And this is why Izzy's heartfelt apology followed by his immediate death is a positive ending. It represents the conviction that no relationship is so broken it can't be mended, but also the assurance that no relationship is so important it can't be ended.

Ed gets to hear the things he needs to hear most - I am sorry, I was wrong, you didn't deserve this - and then Izzy disappears from his life, and with him, all the toxicity he represents.

They can part on good terms, but part they must. So Ed can go into the rest of his life, unburdened.

*read Lundy Bancroft's "Why does he do that", seriously. The whole thing is on archive.org.

[thedomesticanthropologist]

You know how we all kind of collectively agreed that astarian is jealous if you sleep with someone who isn't him and I just kept on rolling that around in my head because in the very beginning he doesn't like you

And he wants to secure a safe place in the group, but if you listen to the dialogue he tries with every companion before you, and he gets rejected.

Oddly enough, he also tries with Alfira, who can objectively offer him nothing and I wanted to expand on my thoughts about that.

I think it all ties into him believing that he has nothing to offer except for his body, except for sex. It's the number one way that he feels he can communicate with others positively, it's the only way he knows how to make a connection because he doesn't actually know how to make meaningful connections.

And most importantly above and beyond all else, he says it's his instinct. And when he says it's his instinct he scoffs and makes a disgusted face and looks upward and away. It's a knee-jerk reaction for him. And he's not a very good planner, we know that. But I think there's a lot to be said for the fact that he does this not only because he thinks it's going to serve him (get him safety, loyalty) but also because he has been so thoroughly trained to initiate these types of encounters that when he feels neutral towards someone or even slightly positive or they are attractive or any sort of thing that would have been a cue for him in his past to go after attempting Target - he just sort of automatically goes for it.

Let me backtrack to my original point about the jealousy. Since he thinks that sex is all that he is good for which he specifically States in his confession if you pick certain dialogue options, then at the point in the game where you haven't an initiated a romance with anyone else he is trying to give you, the player, the only thing he has that he believes has any value. Even if you have an unsuccessful relationship with him he later on says that he believes that it was worth it for you because you got to have sex with a world-endingly beautiful vampire so he does believe that he is giving you something of value.

No imagine him offering up to the player the only thing he thinks has any value at all, his only bargaining chip, literally the only thing that he thinks would make him have or provide worth, and then he's rejected. Not only that, but he's rejected in favor of another companion that he can already most likely identify has more to give than he does.

I don't think he was jealous at all. I think that this was a huge blow to his self-worth or what little is left of it. And please don't take that as a reason to make yourself romance him I'm trying to do a character analysis here, based on his personal motivations. By not taking him up on his offer, he can't use his only "chip" in the bedding pool and is immediately forced to figure out different tactics to survive.

So yeah, I don't think it had anything to do with jealousy in the very beginning. I think it was just the beginning of him figuring out that he's no longer playing the game that he's always played or rather that he can't.

[bloodpen-to-paper]

Analysis of the Trials

The Witches' Road holds four trials, each meant to test the four types of witches that traditionally make up a coven. The trials change the appearance of the coven to match the rooms, and the rooms match the witch who is most being tested in that trial. Despite the big twist regarding the Road (and excluding Rio given she wasn't present for hers), I wanted to analyze the symbolism of the trial setups and what they revealed for each of the witches.

Potions ~ The first trial tested Jen, with the room being set as a modern getaway beach house. It was sleek and pristine, the outfits of the coven were tastefully stylish, and the trial even executed itself by having them do a wine party; it was quite classy to say the least. From what we see of Jen, she's very high-class in her fashion choices as well as her general presentation, and personality-wise she sees herself as a cut above the rest. I believe Jen herself tries to emulate this with her candle business; ultimately though, the business is a bit of a sham that fraudulently copies the all-natural luxury aesthetic. Similarly, as the trials progress we see that Jen can be very crass, selfish and not very "poised"; so, not as classy as she let's on. I believe the reason Jen goes through all this effort is to compensate for her lost magic after being bound. Embracing the high-status markers of regular human society is her way of trying to feel powerful since she can't do so anymore in the world of magic. As a result, the trial formed itself to represent what Jen wants on a surface level, and Jen does take a liking to it, but unlike with Alice and Lilia she doesn't get the personal development the others got. This shiny, rich aesthetic isn't what she truly wants; Jen wants her power back, real power, and no cheap imitation of luxury will replace the severity of that loss. It's not until she experiences true covenhood that she's able to be a witch again.

Protection ~ The second trial was Alice's, set within a 70's-style music production studio where the coven wore corresponding clothing. The 70's was when her mother Lorna started going around touring music and creating the Ballad (the beginning of the end for Lorna). Music was what her mother was all about, and despite Alice's tumultuous relationship with her witch lineage, the Ballad was what connected the two after Lorna's passing. Alice's motivation for coming to the Road was to find out what happened to her mother, so the room presented itself as though it was a physical representation of Lorna herself. To complete the trial Alice had to confront her family's curse as opposed to something more objective, and once she realized the curse was spreading to the others in the coven, her urge to protect them led to her finally utilizing the magic and music of Lorna that she had long since rejected, gaining more understanding of her inner power as she progressed. Where Alice initially entered the room with caution and fear, she came to fully embrace the spirit of the trial, of Lorna, so wholeheartedly that fire plumed from her sheer spiritual power, and she was able to end her family's curse. Alice got what she needed from the Road, she got her closure, while finally accepting being both a Protection witch, and the daughter of Lorna Wu.

Divinations ~ Finally, Lilia. Her room was a medieval castle setup (I believe in the comics it's stated Lilia came from royalty, and her younger self is shown in a time period that could've have these style castles). The tarot card trial was a test of her divination, with the gravity-flipped sequence was a testament to the element of air and the unbound fluid nature of divination itself. The outfits in this room were the first to not consistently match the room setting (Maleficent lived in a castle like this, but not Glinda), as everyone was dressed in caricaturized witch costumes. I have a more in depth analysis on the possible indications of the costumes regarding Lilia in this post, but the main idea is that each costume held some representational relevance to the witch wearing it, and the caricature-ish nature was a reflection of Lilia's self-view as well as an opportunity for her to reclaim negative stereotyping around herself. Lilia accurately reading herself through tarot in order to understand her own nature was I'd argue the most impactful show of self-actualization and growth in the entire story, with both the setup and costumes representing Lilia's life in some way, and her journey being about accepting the chaotic nature of her trial as it is a reflection of herself, and only by accepting herself is she able to find ultimate fulfillment and harmony.

[temis-de-leon]

New Exchange Student - Magda

Based on my Replaced MC AU/AU Series where the brothers are the ones being replaced, this is one of the NESs (fem!MC x fem!NES).

This is more info about her adding to what I already described and posted in the Replaced MC AU/AU Masterlist.

Main Masterlist

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Full name: Magdalena Caballero

Birthday: September 25

Likes: Autumn nights

Dislikes: Mammon

After being summoned to the Devildom, her strongest motivation is placing herself on top of the food chain. It's an act of survival, but then it becomes a fun pastime, especially when the other human in the house plays along so willingly.

Their friendship is comfortable and fun and it quickly evolves into a playful situationship; and then Magda starts catching feelings and sharing the bed isn't "nothing" anymore.

She refuses to confess, because why risk what little she has when she can just daydream? And also, the humiliation of being rejected just like the brothers had been is a real possibility that she won't accept.

Friends:

Besides MC, the only one Magda has been able to connect to is, horrifyingly, Levi. Despite being a loser who proudly presents himself as an otaku, he's loyal to his friends and himself and every self-hate he feels is driven by envy, his sin, and Magda understands that deeply. She's willing to put his nonsensical rantings aside and she may even defend him from those so-called "normies".

She also hangs out with Asmo from time to time for some partying, but it tends to be a superficial arrangement.

Mammon:

He gets the special treatment, but not the good kind. His greed and her commitment issues don't connect well. They both fight daily for MC's attention and, while it's Magda who has a "deeper" relationship with them, Mammon is the one willing to profess his love. It's a true shame, because they could work together to scam people like professionals.

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I'll make more posts like this one for the other NESs. If you want to know more about her (or them), don't hesitate to ask!

🩷🩷

[pynkhues]

A lot of people think Louis' persona during his "Prince of Iberville" years is not his authentic self and completely OOC. And subsequently that he returns to it with Armand as a coping mechanism instead due to transactional nature of that relationship (Louis starting his "companionship" with Armand as a way to shield Claudia. @dhampirdulac on twt has a few threads on the topic).

Can we hear your thoughts on this? I've seen you mention in the tags that you have other views.

...did Louis start his companionship with Armand as a way to shield Claudia? I don't know if I agree with that at all, rather I interpret it as coming back to what Claudia says to him in 2.02 which is that he doesn't know who he is without Lestat and outside of her. He's spent the last three episodes trying to pursue photography and getting very passionately interested in art and has just that episode been shut down by a gallery owner who won't stage his work.

He makes excuses with Dreamstat - that he can't sit down with a subject because he'll eat them (not true, he worked with mortals for years at The Azaelia, and made genuine, albeit brief, mortal connections in the shelters of Eastern Europe without eating them), the lens is dirty, he's impatient - the latter two probably are true, but that's the thing about art, right? Being a successful artist is less about talent than it is about persistence, which is hard when the creation of art requires vulnerability, and the rejection of that art can feel a rejection of the self.

Louis' seeking not just validation but identity, and Armand floundering at controlling the Coven offers Louis a way back to a part of himself. As he says it, he used to be (and proves to still be) very good at running things, and that is a part of him from before Lestat and Claudia. He holds to it as something that is true of himself. Is it all of him? No, of course not, Louis' a million things, it's what makes him interesting as a character, but he's always been professionally ambitious and I think to deny that part of him is to deny his story. His whole NOLA arc is about the fact that Louis is forced to settle for a secondclass seat at the table when what he really wants to be the head of his own table. He wants power and autonomy and freedom. What's disingenous about him in that era is that Louis has to play submissive and pander to the white men who are a fraction as intelligent, ambitious, capable as he is because it's the only way he can get his leg in.

He, as a character, wants to be respected, he wants to be seen and not just heard, but listened to. I think his relationship with art is something that's really fascinating and I could write a lot about that, but in terms of this question in particular, I think he saw art as a way forward for him and when it left him treading water, he felt crushed by it. His photography's not very good because Louis doesn't have anything to say, he doesn't have an artistic rationale, and he's deliberately been creating distance between himself and everyone around him as a means of emotional survival. How can you capture something artistically that you're refusing to engage with? It's not a coincidence that the best picture he takes is when he's trying to take one of Lestat.

Keeping things casual with Armand was, I think, partially motivated by trying to live a bohemian lifestyle, and making things official wasn't about shielding Claudia. It wasn't about Claudia at all, that's the point, as she says it. It's never about her. It was about slipping back into a job he knows he's good at to give himself a sense of identity, trying to let go of Lestat, and regain control not over Armand, but himself, and affiliate himself with power. If he's dominant over the only person who gets to have a genuine voice in the Coven, isn't that as good as having a voice of his own? And it's that that's disingenous, the idea that he'd ever be happy puppet mastering someone else - - that's not Louis' character. Louis wants to feel professionally fulfilled but he doesn't actually give a fuck about the Theatres des Vampires, and he certainly doesn't give a fuck about the Coven. In fact, he actively dislikes both.

He's tried doing something he was passionate about, has given up when he wasn't immediately good at it, and now is putting himself in a position to run a business he doesn't care about just because he knows he's good at it and it gives him some semblance of a sense of purpose again. The Theatre is not The Azaelia, and that is what I'd say leaves Louis cold.

And look, I actually do think in this early stage of their relationship, there is genuine affection between Louis and Armand too, and I think Louis likes that Armand needs him. Louis wants and needs family around him, and Claudia's pulling away while Armand's desperate to get closer, and I think there's something to Louis trying to let Lestat go that shows his companionship with Armand isn't purely transactional. He wants to move forward, but he's going backwards with pale versions of things that were once important to him - again, the Theatres is not The Azaelia, and Armand is not Lestat.

[maspers]

Ranking the Miracucast by how they'd react to being chosen as the next holder of One For All

Marinette: She would scream and cry and do everything in her power to avoid becoming the next Symbol of Peace. She would then proceed to be one of the most beloved and powerful Heroes the world has ever seen. 9/10

Alya: Depends on when she gets the Quirk. Early Seasons Alya is all about fame and branding, and she'd be loved by the populace as a hero but make a decent amount of rookie mistakes. Late Seasons Alya would be way more competent as a One For All user, but she also knows how to keep things subtle. I can see her becoming an Underground Hero like Eraserhead. Either way, 7/10

Adrien: Yes. 10/10

Nino: He would be very confused as to why he's being chosen, but if his friends were in danger he'd do it. Would much prefer to focus on his music than hero work, and as such would be known for the former more than the latter. 3/10

Chloe: She would try so, so, so hard to be the ultimate superhero that everyone loves. Unfortunately we saw how that went down in canon. She has the potential to great things, but motives will always be a serious problem for her. 4/10

Sabrina: Getting One For All might be what it takes to get her out of her shell. She'd never reach the fame and reputation that All Might and Deku have, but she would treat her powers with utmost respect and very few people would have bad things to say about her as a hero. 7/10

Mylene: She would be very confused, and very scared, and honestly would probably reject the Quirk outright. If forced to take it she'd be great, but I just can't see her wanting to hold on to it. She prefers to change the world in other ways. 3/10

Ivan: Everyone would doubt him due to making assumptions, but he would surpass them all and come into his own as a beloved and respected hero, albeit one that's pretty intimidating. He wouldn't really focus on quirks other than the super strength, but hey, it worked for All Might! 8/10

Rose: Be afraid. Be very afraid. 6/10

Juleka: Guaranteed to be more of the Underground hero type. Possibly might go full vigilante. She would use the Quirks very differently than most would expect, so people won't make the connection to past One For All holders. She does not want to have a body count, but definitely has one. 6/10

Kim: Kim is a total doofus who would immediately gain a rep as a reckless hero who causes lots of collateral damage but makes up for it by just trying really hard. Deep down he will feel unworthy and self-conscious. Local Himbo has internal turmoil and Does Not Deserve It. 5/10

Max: Would reject the Quirk outright and only accept it in the most dire of circumstances. Max does not want a messy complicated Quirk like One For All. Max likes simple and efficient, stuff he can manipulate from the get go. One For All is not simple. Give it to someone else. 0/10

(side note: while Max does not want One For All, Markov absolutely does, and finding a way to give Markov One For All would make for an interesting challenge. But Max still isn't taking it.)

Alix: Would politely decline taking it. Because she's already received it (and passed it on after engaging in brief shenanigans with it) in the future, and knows it is not her battle to fight in the present. Alix/10

Nathaniel: Please let this poor boy have some sleep. He is very tired and very angry and accepted the Quirk on impulse and really doesn't want to do this. Eventually manages to figure out his niche being a artist/spraypaint hero (Alix helps), and may or may not accidentally trigger the downfall of a corrupt government. 7/10

Lila: She obtained it under false pretenses and we are all doomed. There's a slim chance she'll do some hero work for the sake of her image, but like. The cons will definitely outweigh the pros. This was a mistake. 1/10

Luka: Accepted One For All during a time of great need, and knew the moment he received it that it was something Important. He puts on a front of being chill, but treats his work as a Hero with the utmost of seriousness and will do what has to be done. Like his sister, he would actively strive to not have a body count, but definitely would have one. 9/10

Kagami: She's a superhero with a sword. Awesomeness is the default. She will have no idea what she is doing but like. She has a sword. Stuff is getting done. 7/10

Marc: Look, you know Worm? You know Legend? One For All Marc would be like Legend except less hunk and more bishonen. The fangirls and fanboys will rejoice. Marc does not want all the attention, but he has it anyway. 6/10

Ondine: Kim accepts his role as the ultimate trophy boyfriend. Ondine would be competent, but she would also create even more collateral damage. 5/10

Aurore (New!): If there's one thing she knows, it's branding. She may not be known as a particularly powerful hero, but her branding would be top notch. When people figure out she's the latest successor she will OWN it and turn it into more branding. 5/10

Felix: Was likely offered One For All by someone who thought he was Adrien, and accepted it under that pretense. Would do a good job as a hero (and would give Adrien the credit in the process) but would figure out how to use all the Quirks very quickly and have a gig as a vigilante going on under a different identity, using different quirks to keep people in the dark. Very sus, Felix. You can be better than this. 2/10

Zoe: Look the populace would pick up on the fact that she's blonde and associated with America and immediately assume she's related to All Might. That's just going to happen. All Might will basically have to end up adopting her, if he's still around. She does not like this, but makes it work. 6/10

[snackleggg]

Keith & Lotor parallels going burr in my brain.

The fact that the reason they turned out so different in the end was that Keith found a support system while Lotor was completely alone (both due to the actions of the people around him and his own baggage later on)

Father wise, Keith's dad was obviously a good loving parent to him from the little we see. He was a genuinely good guy and had a positive impact on who Keith is even if he wasn't around in his life for long. Meanwhile, Zarkon was neglectful at best, he was heartless and caused untold amounts of emotional and psychological harm to Lotor growing up.

Mentor wise, Keith ended up having Shiro who became like a brother to him. Though we don't see alot of it, from the flashbacks we do get its obvious Shiro took on a parental role in Keith's life after he joined the Garrison. Meanwhile, Lotor's governess was painted as a cold and distant figure. She could've filled a parental role since she was presumably the adult that spent the most time around him but that wasn't her duty, her job was to educate Lotor and the Omega Shield episode shows us she does that using pain as a motivator (which isn't great considering Lotor was like 6 or something when he started learning from her)

Friends wise, Keith is equals with the other paladins. They're peers and while Keith may have been a little closed off to start he obviously opens up to them and trusts them with his life. Meanwhile, there is obviously a divide between Lotor and his generals. They respect him but there is this distance between them. He's not their peer, he's their Prince. He doesn't tell them his full plan or clue them in on his goals, he just gives orders and expects them to follow. It's why his team fell apart and betrayed him, a contrast to how Voltron is built on trust. At this point in his life, Lotor's lack of connection is no longer a direct result of negligence of the adults around him (though their negligence in his formative years is a factor) but instead is caused by his own self sabotaging and inability to trust anyone. Keith does sabotage his relationship with the paladins a little when he becomes unreliable to the team and then leaves for the Blade but he comes back to them and they have a stronger bond than ever (forever insane about the fact that the rift between Keith and the others started because he was late to missions, and when he took up the mantle of the black paladin again he unlocked an ability that let him make it to the fight against Lotor on time to save them. The parallels man)

Mother wise, boy where do I start. Neither of them knew their mothers and both were obviously desperate for closure when it comes to these missing figures in their lives. Keith seeks it through joining the Blades while Lotor seeks it by becoming obsessed with his altean heritage. Krolia & Honerva both care deeply for their sons but where Krolia express this in a healthy way, choosing to protect her son and leave him where he could grow up safe even if it was at the cost of having a relationship with him, Honerva becomes obsessed with having a relationship with Lotor even when he rejects her and even going as far as tearing the multiverse apart for it.

Also the contrast between how Lotor dealt with Narti being used as Haggar's puppet vs Keith's fight with clone Shiro really gets the difference between their characters across. The moment Lotor figures it out, he immediately kills her. It does seem like it's a difficult decision for him in the moment but he still does it in the end and seemingly doesn't take any time to explain to the other generals why he did it, expecting them to blindly follow him like always. Meanwhile Keith never gives up on the possibility of getting Shiro back. Even when it separates him from the team, puts his own life in danger, even when he's falling to his probable death he never let's go of Shiro. Its because of that they had a body to be able to bring Shiro back.

[penultimate-step]

One thing that interests me about Koyomi and Tsubasa's relationship, especially early on, is the contrast between how much they care about each other and how little they really understand each other. From their first meeting, their relationship begins with a complete lack of understanding.

All through Bake, Hanekawa is talked up extremely highly by Koyomi. In his eyes, she's the one who knows everything, the one who is always right. Her own catchphrase might be "I just know what I know," but this is in response to Araragi complimenting her about knowing everything. He rarely thinks that she can possibly be wrong - which makes it almost funny in retrospect to realize that he holds this opinion of her despite the fact that one of the first inferences he every sees her make is massively misreading his own issues.

In Kizu, spurred by the day's sense of melancholy and the sudden absurdity of Hanekawa's skirt situation, Koyomi briefly opens up and is emotionally honest with Hanekawa. (Given that we as readers learn most about him from internal narration, this is bigger than it seems: this is one of the moments when he shares the most about himself out loud to others in the whole series.) It's not his whole deal, not by a long shot, but he gets across the basics: his strained concept of the value of friendship and human connections, his sense of nihilism, and his desire not to have to live as a human: "I want to become a plant," he tells her, "so that I wouldn't have to talk or walk." Honestly I'm not sure what a good response is to someone you are only now having a first conversation with telling you all about his depression, but Hanekawa chooses to reject it. She tells him that normally people would dream of becoming something like a rock, but in his case, since plants are a form of life, "You still want to be a living thing." Subtextually: "You don't really want to kill yourself. You aren't suicidal." To this, Koyomi basically thinks, Huh, never thought about it like that. Maybe you're right. and moves on.

….20 pages later, Koyomi chooses to kill himself for Kiss-Shot's sake, stating, "There isn't a single reason for me to bother staying alive." Kizumonogatari is in large part about Araragi's suicidal depression. Hanekawa, I love you, but you misjudged this one.

Even at this early stage of their relationship, Hanekawa thinks highly of Koyomi, much more than he deserves. As such, when confronted with something she considers a weakness, like his supremely low self-worth, she tries to justify why this isn't actually a trait he has.

Much later, by the time of Neko White, she's gotten a better chance to get to know him and become familiar with his him as a person, including his flaws, enough that she and Senjougahara can list them for hours. But that doesn't necessarily mean she understands him or his motivations - because she cares for him so much, she ends up idealizing his bad traits and his personal weaknesses into charm points and strengths. She says at the book's start that she admires him because of his confidence in his own identity, describing him as a person who doesn't hesitate over questions of who he is as a person or what he should be and do moving forward and comparing herself unfavorably to her own lack of sense of identity.

Readers, having read his narration in Kizu and Neko Black know this is far from true; that he spends a huge amount of page count trying to reflect on where he stands in life. The climaxes of both those books are great examples. In Kizu, Koyomi has a huge internal crisis after seeing the death of Guillotine Cutter. He tells Hanekawa that he is unsure if he is human or monster, worrying even that he'll eat her. He is unsure if he is going to oppose Kiss-Shot or not. And on top of that, his own guilt is eating him alive, causing him to question the worth of all his actions in the book so far. There's no way that this can be called a man sure of who he is, and it is Tsubasa herself who snaps him out of it. He relies on her presence as a guide to move forward. She has first hand experience seeing him experience deep uncertainty as to what kind of person he wants to be, but her narration in Neko White claims the opposite - that his consistency and surety is a trait she admires. A similar kind of struggle happens in Neko Black's ending, though given her own stresses and struggles at the time its very understandable that she didn't catch this one. Time after time Tsubasa is the one to see Koyomi's doubts and greatest moments of weakness, but rather than harm her view of Araragi, if anything it seems to have raised her opinion of him. In her Neko White letter, she admires what she calls "confronting his own weaknesses." She talks about falling in love with him when she saw that he was crying as he saved Kiss-Shot, comparing it negatively to how she showed no emotion and smiles through both suffering and aid. She basically says this outright in the letter: to her, all of Araragi's flaws becomes positive. Moments of self-doubt become moments of self honesty, to cry while acting is to remain true to oneself, and so forth.

Not that Koyomi is a genius at understanding her, either. While he admires her, for most of Kizu a lot of whats going on between them is going on in his head - he's projecting his own issues onto her and he deals with her more as what she represents to him than an equal friend, as he will come to treat her later in Bake and beyond. Neko Black, taking place between these two points, shows him in the middle of this transition.

I feel like there's less to say on his side though, just because Neko Black is much more explicit about Koyomi's failure to understand Tsubasa than Kizu is for the reverse. When she feels obligated by friendship to tell Araragi about her struggles with her family, in a reversal of their first conversation from the start of Kizu, he has this to say about it:

Despite having been friends for a month by then he realizes he has still been seeing her more as an ideal than a person. However, his reaction here, in contrast to when the situation was flipped, also illustrates that his way of misunderstanding is subtly different from the way Hanekawa misunderstands him. Rather than a direct dismissal, Koyomi, while originally ignorant, does come around to understanding What Tsubasa will do. However, he does this while blocking out any understanding of Why she would act like this. He can grasp the actions and emotions, but not the underlying causes.

As an example, near the end of Neko Black, after Koyomi has had some time to internalize his new understanding of Hanekawa, he is able to predict her words to her father before Meme tells him, then later develops a plan to deal with the Cat based around predicting her actions well in advance, first luring her out and then baiting her into attacking him. However, despite all this, he seems to have no knowledge, or perhaps is intentionally blocking out, the motivations behind her actions. Theres a reason she calls him "the worst" when he offers to give his time and energy to deal with her stress. (And much like when he healed her injury earlier, this is him dealing with symptoms rather than the true problem.) Because he's totally misjudging what she actually wants.

A similar pattern can be seen in the Cat chapter of Bake, when he first sees the cat. He realizes this means she's stressed, and can guess at how this will make her act and that things might get dangerous, but has no idea what set her off this time, not until the Cat tells him outright why things got to this point.

Koyomi views Hanekawa so highly, almost like she is incapable of making mistakes, despite having personal experience from the get go that she is very capable of making mistakes and that sometimes her inferences are wrong, and that she is often wrong about him, specifically. Hanekawa is wrong about Koyomi because she does the same thing, and views him so highly that she dismisses and glosses over his faults that she has seen personally. Together, they both consistently fail to understand each other because they place the other on a pedestal without meaning to. And yet, the book is clear that despite this gap in understanding, the friendship is no less for it. The care between the two is real, as is the effort they take in each other's lives.

[crookedkryptonitebeliever]

But what if we wanna do the dirty dirty with another man, or even with yandere big bro himself, does he say "no" politely? Is he shocked? Does he go feral? Does he spiral? I want to see him spiral.

TW: reader cheatingz, mentions of incest, grooming, violence

Depending on what was agreed between the two of you, the rules on that can be very lax. Usually, people don't discuss their bedroom activities with someone in the family. Quite uncommon to hear sons describing how their girlfriends want them to moan in the bedroom, to their mothers and daughters mentioning that their boyfriends have them in a mating press to their fathers. The same goes with Yves. If you don't agree to be romantically involved, he will instantly assume a role similar to a guardian. It will feel weird telling Yves you want to have sex with another person. It will feel just like telling your parents or your siblings about it.

It doesn't mean Yves won't know about your desires. He just has no intention of ever discussing your private tendencies unless it is regarding your safety.

If you go ahead and tell him (while he isn't your boyfriend/husband), his reactions depend on your intentions. Yves will sit you down and talk about sexual safety and assure you that he will support you no matter what happens, this is if you're telling him because you're unsure, scared, or feeling forced by your partner. He will offer to talk to your partner privately, to come to a 'compromise'. Regardless of whether you accepted or rejected his help, he will have a meeting with them anyway. No way in hell is Yves letting anyone hurt his precious darling.

If your intent was to spite him or just to see what he would do, Yves will give you a spine-chilling stare before bluntly asking what your motive is. He knows. He absolutely knows. Yves just wants to see you squirm in discomfort just like how you wanted him to. He will keep grilling you until you shy away from embarrassment and apologize to him with a level of sincerity he expects.

If you're telling him nonchalantly, like this is a topic as mundane as the weather, Yves will state that this isn't a comfortable subject to him; as well as to a lot of people. He wouldn't cast judgment, Yves would set a boundary with you and explain how speaking about such matters to strangers, friends or family could be inappropriate. Parenting you, in a way.

Regardless of your aim, mentioning that you carnally desire your own older brother would get an entirely different response. You were groomed and he knows that this is a delicate situation, he cannot simply scold some sense into you, it must be a combination of compassion and self-realization on your part. Yves would choose his words, tone, and body language very carefully before asking questions with increasing levels of specificity, to try and drive you to see it from his perspective; or anybody else's lens, just not yours or your brother's. Needless to say, he will be paying a visit to your brother soon with a vial of some mysterious substance tucked in his sleeve.

The situation changes entirely if you are in a relationship together. Yves is strictly monogamous, he will make sure you understand he doesn't want you to bring up the idea of polyamory later in the relationship. But, if he predicts that you cannot keep your hands off other people and he isn't fulfilling enough for you that you have to cheat, Yves will automatically fill a platonic position in your life instead. He will be the closest to you, but he will not be your Husband, boyfriend, or even a fling. Yves will even reject your love confession if you ever happen to have one.

Yet, he is a constant presence in your life. It is undeniable how much he meddles with your marriage. Just like previous posts described, he is a true monster in law to your partner(s).

However, if you manage to bypass all his oracle-like forecasts and commit adultery with another person long after you and he agree to keep the intimate connection only between the both of you, his composure will have a fissure. He wouldn't be overly explosive, but he will absolutely traumatize you with tears running down his cheeks. Yves almost never cries genuine tears outside of his manipulative tricks, but you will see true pain leaking out of his eyes when you betray him like this. It will take a very long time until you get to have your freedom back, you will be a witness to a brutal murder after all, he can't have you running around with that loudmouth of yours. Neither will he trust you to remain celibate for him without his active intervention.

This is one of the few ways that will lead Yves to reveal his information vault to you. Expect him to be a lot more restrictive and controlling than ever, divorce or separation is not an option at all. It will be the first time Yves will force you to be in a condition without being discrete or tactful about it, he will finally put himself first.

The consequences are less severe if you merely suggest doing it. Yves will be calm and collected, crossing his legs and gracefully resting his hands on his lap. Inviting you to talk about it further, discussing your intent and disrespect towards him, he will be giving you the benefit of the doubt. So use this opportunity to either back down, present your case, or ask for help. His actions and words seem poised and peaceful, but the tears dripping down his eyelashes tell you otherwise. Maybe he isn't noticing that he's crying, too focused on pulling the cracks of his control together; He never once brought a hand up to wipe them away, blurring his vision and ruining his expensive coat.

Humans cannot control how they feel, they cannot control what they think most of the time; and Yves understands that, he was human once after all. He will help you through it if you're saying such hurtful things to him to release and eradicate unwanted degenerate thoughts. Almost everything will return back to normal once the issue is dealt with.

Yves will be colder, and more distant for a few months, yet he will be around you much more. He is still deeply ruined and would weep to himself several nights, he needs to update his database too with anything he can observe, anything he can record. Everything and anything to correct this major oversight, it affects him so much that he cannot trust you and his logic.

If it's the other possibility where you simply want to see how he will react, if it's a show you want, then a show you shall get. You will feel the pain you unnecessarily inflicted on him, you will realize that you get back what you put out in the world, and you will learn that if you play stupid games you win stupid prizes.

You will learn that Yves is not someone to be fucked with. You will soon discover that he has been nothing but a saint to you, how lucky you were to never have seen this side of him, you only saw the most merciful and considerate Yves.

Don't forget, he has an almost complete collection of what makes you cower and whimper in fear. All your traumas, even genetic from ancestors that you never met. Yves can easily utilize and expand that list by a vast number. Do not test his patience.

[sunisglowing]

NEW MOON IN ANURADHA - PICK A CARD

(sidereal scorpio)

♡ WHAT SHOULD YOU DEVOTE YOURSELF TO? ♡

<<following your heart's desire>>

°•° << tip me in my paypal to support me >> °•°

PILE 1

Pile 1, I'm seeing you need to get out of your headspace and start living in the reality. (regarding your desired relationship). You have formed picture perfect image in your mind of how a relationship should be, but it will only overwhelm you and complicate things while making your choices. You wont know if something or someone is worthy unless you give it a chance and open yourself to it.

Devote yourself to the will of the cosmos. Stop trying to control what's coming in your way and just flow with it. Accept it. You need to change your perspective. A belief or mindset is keeping you stuck and creating the kind of wish or movement you deeply desire. Stop being so stubborn about it. Make some space in your heart and be open to receive love. Maybe you want a partner really bad but this fantasy in your head isn't allowing you to be open to something really good that is in front of you. Put your guards down and allow your heart to explore the new adventure the universe has designed for you. The picture for this pile is so on point lol.

I'm seeing that if you do this, a new relationship (platonic, romantic, mentor, whatever you are desiring right now) will come to you sooner than you might imagine. Be open giving and receiving love and joy. Take it easy-peazy. I see a relationship passionate person coming your life that will make you feel inspired and motivated again. This person is going to be in your life for a long period of time. Feels like a lifelong friend even if its romantic which is great. I'm also seeing that you should or you might connect with someone from your past. A childhood friend or someone you have been with a very long period of time. If you had a falling out with someone in the past or a bad breakup, it's time to make peace with the past. At the end of the day, you are who you are and you are here because of your past so don't be so there is something you learned from it so don't be harsh on yourself and your past self now. You have grown and matured so take those lessons forward with you!! I hope this reading helped you!! please tip me in my PayPal if you found this reading helpful🤍 have a great day or night!!

PILE 2

Pile 2, I'm seeing that you have been juggling with a lot of responsibilities lately. Financially, I'm seeing that you might have had to work twice as hard to meet your needs. It hasn't been an easy time for a period of time. Maybe your overburdened with your work or your business. You are juggling too many things at once. It might that you are a student and also working. Some of you might have a regular corporate job with one or more side business or passion projects you have been working on. Someone of you, it's home life and work life that's going messy and hard to adjust to. You need a work life balance whatever your situation might be.

Devote yourself to some 🌺ME TIME🌺. The thing is that you need to take some time out just for yourself. It's like life has been more about other people and their expectations and problems than you and what you enjoy. It feels like you have been doing exactly what people would like you do, trying to be the person that society, family or people expect you to be, but it's time that you march to the beat of your own drum. This is also a sign that you should pursue your dreams and desires. What have you been wanting for a long time but putting it on the back burner?? I think particular thing varies in this group.

For some of you this is a relationship that you desire but haven't been pursuing. Maybe because of cultural or family pressure. I'm coming from a brown asian family so I understand. Maybe this is a career path or creative hobby that you are scared of pursuing because of rejected or disapproval from family. For some of you, I see thar you need to go out and explore the world. Traveling is coming through strong. You should do it to relax and rejuvenate. You need adventure and a breath of fresh air. You need to feel inspired again. And inspiration and growth doesn't come if you stay stuck at one place. You need to move. Maybe move your body, practice yoga, stretch or meditation. Traveling near water bodies will be very healing for you!! I see that if you go out and travel, you may find a romantic partner. The lovers card is here so just saying.. being around water 💧 and me time with some solo travel will be very beneficial for you!! I hope this helped you Pile 2!! please tip me in my PayPal if you found this reading helpful!!🤍 have a great day or night!!

PILE 3

Hi there PILE 3, I see that you have been really focused on work. Is it an escape from your pain?? I think you have been ignoring your heart and your feelings. Something might have really pinched you and its hurting. Financially you are stable and secure. Actually you are at a very good place. Like you have everything you need and want. But from the inside, there is so much gloominess and pain. You are working like a robot and it's not nice. Please give time to yourself and sit with the pain. Please stop neglecting it. It will get harder to ignore.

this message is for a very few of you- it might be that you got pregnant but you don't want to be a parent rn. you want to feel like a kid again. you really love your childlike wonder and you are really curious as a person. you aren't just ready for this responsibility (acc. to you)

if you had a breakup with someone, you might be really heartbroken with this one. you should devote yourself to some self-love and self-care. spend time with your mother. you need to do something creative. spend time on your hobbies. have fun doing things that bring you joy!! put your ideas into action. maybe this pain has inspired you in a way in which you could express it creatively. your creative talents are insane!! like some of you are really good at what you do!! you should do it more because it will give you more confidence!! i hope this helped you Pile 3!! please tip me in my PayPal if you found this reading helpful!!🤍 have a great day or night!!

PILE 4

PILE 4, so your reading is so full of Cups cards!! I think your are really having a hard time trusting your intuition and emotions. You feel conflicted. Like it's really hard for you to make a choice. You want to choose the best and the best thing, whatever it maybe. You are afraid of making the wrong choice. You are also really guarded and cautious at the moment. is something happening in your home life, or something that is threatening your sense of security and stability??

Some of you might have to make an important decision. Something that is really important to you!! For example, you value your career a lot!! So you are finding it really hard to pin point what will suit you the best as a career? what will bring you tye most money or which career would feel fulfilling ?? these kinda questions have been running in your head for quite a long time and it might be giving anxiety!

You need to devote yourself to be calm from the inside. I just think that you are afraid of making the wrong move! You are really stressed as of right!! So you need to devote yourself in prioritizing your mental health! You can't make a good well thought choice with a chaotic mind. You need to be grounded in this situation. Express your emotions. Stop expecting people to read your mind. Be diplomatic and take care of your family members!!💙 i hope this helped you Pile 4!! please tip me in my PayPal if you found this reading helpful!!🤍 have a great day or night!!

● do not copy, reword, steal my readings in this or any other platform

● tips are always appreciated, it gives me motivation to do more

● do comment and share your experiences

[aashi-heartfilia]

Who you are really? TogaChako's brand of Love

So, finally we have a confirmation of Ochako's feelings about Toga. Yes, she's saving her and yes it's gonna be good.

Honestly, TogaChako's development is the one I'm looking forward to the most, and I like it even more than Deku and Shigaraki cause unlike Deku who got his magical visions about a child crying inside etc, Ochako sees Toga for who she is. A person, who deserves to smile and it didn't happen instantly...

Ochako started out as a young student with a shallow motive, to a person who wants to save people to a hero who wants to save her fellow heroes to an ultimate hero who will save anyone in need.

Yes, Ochako loves seeing people happy and yes, Toga comes is that list. This is so dear to me because this is what MHA does the best, i.e. handle the emotional beats of the story.

Here, Toga goes through an existential crisis where she doubts if her love for her found family is genuine or not.

Ofc she loves Dabi and Shigaraki to bits. Lov us her family but she doesn't want to become them, completly.

Theoretically, she should be able to copy quirks as well like with the real Twice but she can't maybe because deep down she doesn't want that either.

She's not interested in this world domination thing, she just wants a world that is easier to live in but if she wants to live, she has to follow orders, she has to pick sides.

Toga lived a hard life because of her quirk and all she wanted was to be accepted for who she really is. She has very less self worth, so her quirk allows her to become the person she wants to; very literally.

So, I think what she feels deep down is dire admiration, born out of her own self hatred.

Bloodlust = self hatred

When she was little, she was always asked to be normal.

She was different but she was asked to be like everyone else, which made her hate herself unknowingly and served as a drive to become other people.

We know her first incident happened during middle school and everyone else reported how she was a very cheerful and social girl.

But very likely, her parents weren't that supportive calling her demon and taking her to quirk councelling sessions which made matters worse.

If she was satisfied with herself, maybe she wouldn't feel so blood thirsty. But this has never happened before cause the formula keeps repeating except for the Lov where she found true love and acceptance.

She had a connection with all members of Lov but with Twice it was different. She was devastated by his death and that actually made her question the ideology of the heroes.

Ochako is pretty similar. She wants to be like Deku because he's cool and all but she doesn't love him, at least not in that way.

What she has always felt was a deep admiration for her closest friend which is why people like Mina, mistook it for love.

Of course, you would love to keep stuff from your idol close to your heart and of course, you would want to become like them.

But admiration isn't the only thing that Ochako feels.

In the start, Ochako also had very less self worth. Coming from a lower class family, shallow reasons for becoming hero but as the series progressed , we see her develop not just as a person but as hero who is willing to save anyone in need.

She always thought that Deku was amazing but after the Deku Retrieval arc we see her acknowledge him as a normal person with a special power.

Deku is still her close friend but she's also her own person now.

And this is where the connection between Ochako and Toga comes from.

Ochako found a healthy environment to learn and grow while Toga was always rejected and neglected until she joined the league.

But the connection lies in their admiration as well

They both the admire the same person, Deku.

Not love but admire.

Because reasons. But Toga also loves Ochako, Stain, Izuku and even Twice?

It's very simple actually. You can admire a lot of people at the same time and want to become like them.

Toga just wants an easier world for herself to live in and just like Shigaraki and Dabi she wasn't a born villain.

But aspiring heroes like Ochako are brainwashed into thinking that villains are bad and heroes good. They don't have any problems and they just like to wreck havoc.

So, when Ochako's saw her tears, she realised that even the labelled villains that are seen as nothing but menace can have their own problems.

What makes her interesting is that she realises that things done by Toga are wrong and that they are way past the point of forgiveness.

But what made her do those terrible things?

What are the driving factors?

What drove her to insanity?

She's already thinking about all of this and we know that if there is something that she could do to put an end to this sad Girl's Parade, she'll definitely do that.

Ochako has already gotten past this and accepted herself for who she is and she needs Toga to do the same.

[ancientgoddessofegypt]

The Healing Light: Your Aura Is The Passage Way To Divine Fortune & Attraction

So I want to specifically talk about the aura and how this energy in us when unlocked can be a superpower.

Most people don't understand the weight thats been holding on to their spirits and sometimes the lack of knowledge of knowing who they are can be the reason dense energy blocks their aura from truly shining.

What I mean is, we've all come here to be a light in some way or some form. Wether it is to be a light in the dark, to be the sun and/or the moon. To be somebody. To be important. We all came to do one thing, and it's to glow.

Everyone has this gift, no one was eliminated from this. The truth is, some don't know how so they find other ways to get noticed. This can be good or bad, but getting attention isn't always what we need.

To be a healing light, you have to know the reason why your born, what did you come here for, and why?

Theres a saying that we are all stars, do you believe it? We all came from some where, whether you believe in reincarnation, past lives and living beyond the stars... theres a reason why you came here. And once you relax in that essence, you will glow.

Glowing is a big part of attraction and attracting the things we want and desire. When we know who we are and we let that shine through, the spirit within us comes out and soars. Its a part of self-mastery. The soul meets with the mind and the body, and becomes the middle man out of the three. Awakening the senses and anybody who feels you will come up to you to either give or receive. When we are in our divine light, we can find our mission, our souls purpose and what we truly want for ourselves. You won't ever have to beg for nothing, because your soul comprehends the reality of what it wants. And the more you allow your soul in, the more you wont want for much. Because your soul has everything, it just needs to wake up.

The Divine Light will tell you all the answers if you wait, your intuition is your divine light. Your soul purpose is your divine light. Your strengths and weakness. Divinity. Your gifts, your divine light. All of these things shape you and make you who you are, so no fear, doubt, or playing small will ever take that away.

The point of the message is to be yourself. That connects you to your soul group, to your drive, what truly motivates you. Your biggest desires will come in and you will make sense of all that is within you.

When you awaken the spirit, you will realize that some of the blockages with obtaining what you wanted at the time was because it wasn't for you. You know that saying 'Rejection is protection?' There you go. When we are ourselves, we wait for the right time. The right answers, the right team. The right everything. Listening to your intuition will bring you closer to self, and in a way closer to the God within. Whether you believe in God, The Universe, or whatever.. these concepts live within us. It lives in you, in your heart.

So I want a breakthrough for everyone reading this, you have to be who you are. That is the only way your blessing can come in full bloom. When you hide your gifts, you hide yourself. When you hide yourself, you create a dense energy around your auric field causing you to feel stuck. Getting out of that energy takes longer because you're shadow self is hiding when its your full power.

Take this as you will, but remember, it is safe to be you.

It is your currency, and its the only way out of here. Wink ;)

[max1461]

Look, I just don't buy that people's stated beliefs are a very consistent guide to understanding or predicting their actions. I mean, it's an idea that has some intuitive currency, but that doesn't mean it's true or even that it should be our null hypothesis. Our null hypothesis should probably be "no correlation", and I think obviously we have enough evidence to reject that. But that doesn't mean that we can default to "strong correlation"! In particular, I think if you just like, interact with people, it becomes obvious that they say things they don't believe and believe things they don't say all the time. They act based on vague gut feelings and justify it with some narrative later. They bullshit, say whatever is convenient in the moment, thinking only about how it sounds and not what it means. They also say things they actually mean, but it can be very hard to tell which things are which (sometimes intentionally!). Often there is no sharp dichotomy. People just do shit and say shit, those things aren't necessarily connected to each other.

This doesn't mean that people's stated beliefs are no guide to their actions, obviously that's not true either. I mean, duh. If you go through life just ignoring the content of what people say you won't make it very far. And I think "I take people's word for what they believe, and assume that their beliefs are reflected fairly literally in their actions, unless I'm given strong reason not to" is, for what it's worth, a really good heuristic—better than most alternatives. But the thing about using a heuristic profitably is that you have to recognize that it's a heuristic, you can't actually conflate it with ground truth. And the ground truth, again, seems to me to be that people just do shit and say shit a lot. Guess it depends on who you're spending time with. But like, enough people do this that you have to take it into account.

This isn't about anything in particular, it's just that "of course we should take people's stated beliefs more-or-less literally when trying to predict their actions or understand their motivations" is a refrain I hear around here a lot as if it's self evident. And I think it's not only not self evident, it's like, actively misleading. Out of politeness and respect, among other reasons, I believe in basically taking people at their word. But you should probably maintain a pretty high prior that any given thing being said is kind of a little bit bullshit so that you aren't caught off guard when it inevitably happens. And, more importantly, if you're reasoning about large populations or large bodies of speech, you should be prepared for a bunch of it to be kinda bullshit. Because it will be.

[i-will-change-this-someday]

My thoughts on Frankenstein:

(This is incredibly long)

Victor is definitely autistic or something right?

It’s honestly shocking to me how much of the book was just describing the scenery.

Also, because I self project constantly, Victor seems kinda Ace to me, maybe Aro with a QPR with Henry, but that might be actual romance.

Kinda surprised that no one ever stops Victor to ask why he’s collecting so many body parts, they’re just like “eh, Victor’s experimenting on corpses again, I guess.”

Absolutely wild for Caroline to adopt a child for the sole purpose of “gifting” her to her son.

I wish I could be motivated in to a hyper-focused frenzy where I actually complete my projects, maybe not for 2 years though.

Alright time for all my unpopular opinions. (this will likely be very long)

Y'all are babygirl-ifying the Creature way too much. My dude murdered at least 4 people. (Technically murdered 3 and framed the 4th for murder.)

Hey, remember when the Creature murdered a child? Yeah, that happened.

Or when he framed a woman for murder, knowing full well what would likely happen to her? (The Creature didn't even know she had any connection to Victor, he fully decided to frame her because of the idea that she would reject him)

or when he murdered 2 people just because Victor cared about them?

I'm not saying the the Creature isn't sympathetic, and it really is unfair that everyone shuns him, but that doesn't mean he gets a "Murder innocents" pass.

On a similar note, and this is maybe just me, but Victor is way more sympathetic than anyone gives him credit for.

When he made the Creature he was a dumb kid that was messing with things he really shouldn't have, but he was grieving his mother and coping very poorly.

So he thinks "what if I could bring her back?" or at least "Maybe I can prevent losing anyone else" so he tries """Playing God""" but it's not because he has a god complex, he's mourning a loss and is doing anything to not think about it while also trying something that might prevent such loss in the future.

I do think he's a bit self-centered, but not in a "I'm superior" way , more in a "Why is this happening to me?" way that makes him forget others' perspectives or how his actions may affect them.

I don't think he's always thinking about how every other person is dumber than him or how great he is.

I do think he has a very strong desire to have his achievements seen and known, because for quite a while everyone dismissed his interests. (Which, just saying, can really do some damage on a kid)

Should Victor not have abandoned the Creature? Yes, but he also didn’t exactly have the mental or emotional capacity to care for the Creature at that time.

When the Creature awoke, Victor was faced with the reality of what he was doing; he wasn’t bringing someone back to life, he was creating something else entirely, so he ran. And afterwards the Creature was gone, and then Victor had a psychotic break for like several months. He wasn’t really in peak parent mode then.

(Side tangent, but any of those “I wouldn’t run from the Creature” people are absolutely lying, you’re really going to react calmly to a 8ft shambling monster made from dead bodies?)

Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying Victor is entirely innocent, but there's a lot of things that he get's blamed for that were not his fault.

Not one of the deaths in the book are Victor's fault.

William died because he screamed and revealed his family name, so the Creature killed him to hurt Victor.

Justine died because the Creature framed her because he thought she would reject him and because she was pressured in to pleading guilty.

Henry died because the Creature wanted to hurt Victor.

Elizabeth died because the Creature wanted to hurt Victor.

If you think any of those deaths are Victor's fault, then you're victim blaming.

Yes, the Creature likely wouldn't have done any of that had Victor not ran, but you know what else would have prevented those deaths? If the Creature didn't kill them.

The Creature is an incredibly intelligent being, by the time he kills William he has learned enough to properly frame a woman for murder.

You can not say he accidentally killed William, he knows what death is.

He didn't accidentally frame Justine for said murder.

He didn't just so happen to kill Henry because he got caught off guard by him.

He wasn't looking for Victor to kill on the wedding day.

He chose to kill every single one of them, and to put all the blame on Victor is unfair to Victor and the Creature.

The Creature is his own person, which means he also needs to be held responsible for his actions.

You can understand and sympathize with the Creature, but that doesn't mean he's infallible.

The Creature has every right to be mad at the world, his first experience in the world is being abandoned by the one who gave him life, and then he is constantly shunned, feared, and hated for the rest of his life, it's not right.

But that doesn't mean you murder people, or if he had to, he should have killed Victor, the person that actually wronged him.

And listen, I understand every minority feels a kinship with the Creature, but for me, there's something about Victor that is so unbearably relatable.

The thing about Victor is that he has people that care for him, but none of them understand him in the slightest, even Henry, he may love Victor but I don't think he really understood him all the time.

So you have Victor, who has people who care for him and who he cares for in return, trying his best to act normal, to pretend there's nothing wrong.

He's trying so, so hard not to worry the people he cares for, but on the inside he's miserable, paranoid, and overall just incredibly mentally unwell.

And that is something that is just so intriguing to me. (Not saying the Creature isn't also very nuanced and complex, just that Victor scratches some itch in my brain.)

Anyway, this is already very long, I honestly have more I could say about it, but this is good for now.