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xmasterofmunsonx · 3 days

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Got Your Number

Summary: You’re Steve Harrington’s older sister and after a rough and tumultuous breakup, you’re back in Hawkins, Indiana. 🌶️

Pairing: Harrington!reader x Eddie Munson

Author’s notes: hi hello!!! long time no update. been sitting on the first half of this for months and wrote the second half over the last two days. I love this story and honestly at this point I’m writing it for myself and everyone else enjoying it is just a plus. If you’re still hanging in there with me, thanks 🩷

Warnings: 18+ (Minors DNI!!), language, drinking, weed, mentions of past abusive relationship, body image issues, shitty parent relationship, smut

Word count: 8K

VII.

Two weeks had gone by in a flash while working full time at your dads office. It really wasn’t all that bad, and everyone that worked there had either known you your whole life, or they knew your dad well enough to not give you a hard time- whether it’s because they figured he gave you a hard enough time anyway, or they were afraid of him, you weren’t too sure.

Eddie and the guys seemed to have moved on from the record deal and decided to not sign it, and you were thankful because you were afraid they’d be making a huge mistake in doing so, but you didn’t miss the lack of spark that your boyfriend had shown the last two weeks- he’d canceled Hellfire one night, and was threatening to cancel it now at 4 pm, a few hours before it was supposed to start.

“C’mon, what else are you going to do?” You asked him, the work phone between your shoulder and ear as you were busy with some paperwork.

“Practice, and maybe practice some more. We’re having a really hard time nailing down Maiden’s ‘Wasted Years’ for our show.” You heard him sigh, and tapping his fingers on something at his work through the other end of the phone line.

“Babe, the song just came out a little while ago. I don’t think anyone expects perfection, and you don’t have to play it until you’re ready to.”

He was quiet for a moment before speaking, “I just can’t stop thinking about what if another scout is out there at the next show and we don’t blow them away? We could’ve just missed our chance to make it big.”

“Eddie, you didn’t. I promise.” You twirled the phone cord, “Steve said Dustin is driving him insane because he’s been bugging him since all you’ve been doing is practicing with the band or seeing me- you need to spend some time with them.”

“I don’t need the guilt from you too.” He said quickly.

“I’m not guilting you- I’m just trying to help you keep things normal as you… your brain adjusts to the meds.” Eddie had taken the doctors orders and actually complied with taking the medication he needed for two weeks straight. The first week was the worst- the mood swings were a little more unpredictable, and the anxiety was heightened but you could tell he was starting to level out a little now by the end of the second week. He was even getting better sleep already, and he hadn’t woken up from a nightmare since the third night.

“I’m doing better already. Do you want me to take you on a date or something instead?”

“Eddie, why don’t you want to have Hellfire tonight? You do every single Friday night.”

“I just… I don’t wanna feel different for that. I don’t wanna lose my spunk with it.”

“Do you really feel like you’ve lost it in other ways?” This was the first he’d mentioned any of this, and you really wish you weren’t having this conversation over the phone, but you knew it was probably easier for him to tell you these things without being face to face.

“I mean, kinda, I can’t get the riffs right on that goddamn song to save my life.”

You laughed, “Eddie. That song is a completely different sound from almost any other Maiden song, I heard you playing it the other morning before I walked out of your bedroom. You’ve got it. If anything, I think you’re focusing and you’re trying harder than you ever have before. Plus, this is Hellfire we’re talking about here- you are the most dramatic person I know, including right now, you could never lose your flair for dramatics. Do you want me to DM tonight, or something? I can pull out one of my old campaigns if you haven’t already stolen them all.”

“Would you?” He sounded sheepish as he asked the question.

“I may need some assistance in refreshing on actually how to properly be a dungeon master but I think I can swing that for once. If everyone’s okay with it.” You scribbled down some ideas you’d had as you listened to Eddie go on about how the guys usually played out the campaigns and you knew exactly which one you wanted to try out on them tonight.

“Never thought a Harrington would grace the table of Hellfire Club. Welcome.” Dustin spoke to you as you sipped on a glass of whiskey over ice.

“Henderson, who do you think Eddie got some of those twisted campaign ideas from? His little pea brain?” Gareth quipped at Dustin immediately.

“Hey!” Eddie said from the corner of the room, as you blew a kiss at him.

“I told you, we started Hellfire together back in middle school. Were you even born then?”

“What?! I’m not that young.” He shrugged.

You rolled your eyes, “Good luck. You’re gonna need it.”

“She’s not joking.” Gareth nudged Dustin- who’d looked all too confident when he learned you’d be the dungeon master tonight. “I almost cried once.”

You had to turn away to keep from laughing and avoid spitting out the alcohol in your mouth. You were feeling warmed up, but nervous as you waited for everyone to get to Eddie’s music store where he hosted the games in the back room. You loved the cozy feeling of it versus using a room at your school that you had to beg and plead for, and Eddie had told you it had been a fight to keep it going during high school without you being in the club to be the representative for it. He claimed they would’ve let you have any room in the schpracticeool if you asked for it, while they were begrudgingly given the drama room and even then sometimes they had to move a campaign night because of play practice running over. The back room was decked out with band posters, show flyers- new and old, and some odds and ends mounted on the wall.

“Ready, my love?” Your heart swooned at Eddie who’d also been sipping whiskey all night, his ringed hand was clutching a glass similar to yours, except his was a little more empty than yours. You loved how into character he always got, and you felt butterflies as he wrapped his other arm around your waist and kissed your temple. “Thanks for being willing to step up tonight.”

“I can’t say that it’ll happen often, but you owe me big time, Munson.” You locked eyes with his crazy wide brown ones.

“Oh believe me, I know how I’m paying you back tonight.”

“Then you better stop drinking now before you get whiskey dick, babe.” You whispered in his ear, and kissed his earlobe, your teeth lightly biting it- thankful his curtain of hair could hide your actions. Okay, maybe you were two glasses of whiskey deep now. But you didn’t have the energy you used to and you needed everything you could to pull tonight off.

Everyone had taken a seat at the table, Eddie had lent you his seat at the head of the table, and he scooted a chair up beside yours to help you if you needed it. You were excited, nervous, but mostly you were just happy that Eddie had decided to not cancel tonight. You could tell that he was really in his element here, and this normalcy was what he really needed.

“Alright everyone. Get nice and cozy, because we’re gonna be here all night long.” You sat down and rifled through your notes, smiling at a few of the add ons Eddie had scribbled down, god only knows when, as you started the campaign. You took a sip of your half refilled glass, then cleared your throat and started speaking. “Tonight, we’re in the kingdom of Evercrest.” You heard Gareth groan across the table and you shot him a look, he knew that you had many campaigns written for this kingdom. You remember that some of these used to take two or three sessions to finish, but they were some of your best work, honestly.

“Never heard of that one.” Mike quipped as he crunched on a Pringle.

“Shush.” Eddie snapped beside you, and you held back some giggles.

“Tonight we’ll be playing the Shadows of Evercrest. One of the darkest and most mysterious kingdoms of all- it’s a kingdom on the brink of being completely engulfed by darkness brought on by dark magic and ancient curses. Most recently, there have been many disappearances in the kingdom. Each disappearance has brought the kingdom closer and closer to being overthrown.”

Everyone was dead silent as they looked at you in shock as you felt yourself returning back to your old ways of being a dungeon master. You had the entire attention of the whole table, and you started to get sweaty hands. Eddie placed a gentle hand on your leg and squeezed it, you looked at him- his eyes were full of admiration as he encouraged you to continue on.

An hour into gameplay, you had another drink and you were feeling bold enough to reveal the first twist of the night.

“Elara’s influence in the kingdom is growing stronger, but how? When you’ve all been so successful so far.” You sipped and placed your glass down to your left. “There is a traitor among the allies.” Gasps were heard from all around.

“No! Absolutely not!” Dustin exclaimed, slamming his fist down, “that’s-”

“That’s how it goes, my friend. Elara has enchanted an ally, with her dark magic.” You waved your hand over them as if you were a witch yourself, pretending to cast a spell over them. “The illness that swept over Evercrest took her sister, and now she has plagued the kingdom with these disappearances seeking revenge in the name of her sister. The ally has been enchanted by her.” You kept on, “Will you confront your former ally and try to redeem them, or will you cut ties and focus on stopping Elara’s plans?” You sat back in the chair and watched as the group was talking amongst themselves and deciding what to do.

“Can we break?” Will asked as he raised his hand, almost afraid of what you were going to say.

“Absolutely.” Eddie answered for you, grabbing your notebook from the table so no one could peek, then clutching your hand and dragging you out the side exit door of the breakroom into the dark alleyway. “You. Have. No. Idea. What. You’re. Doing. To. Me.” He pinned you against the brick wall kissing your neck between words, the coldness was a harsh contrast to the warmth from his mouth. “Fuck, you’re such a goddamn nerd too, driving me crazy when you’re like this.” He nipped at your neck and worked his free hand over your body as you bit back moans.

“Never knew I did this to you, Eddie.” You chuckled as you entwined a hand of yours into his curls, letting him continue to scatter kisses over your exposed neck and chest. “Don’t leave a mark, they’ll know.”

“As if my raging boner isn’t enough of a hint, fuck.” He was out of breath as he pressed his forehead against yours. “That, t-that’s my girl back there. Not that bullshit cheerleader who was a fucking bully in high school.” You kissed him on the lips and he pulled you close by your neck. “I don’t wanna go back in there, ‘wanna take you right here.” His hand slid down to your lower back, then to your ass where he squeezed it and pulled it to meet his groin where he was very obviously hard.

“Eddie, we can’t. I promise as soon as we get back to your place we can, we’ve still got another few hours left.”

He quickly shook his head as he smothered you with more kisses, “can’t wait that long.”

“You’re gonna have to.” You pushed him off of you gently, grabbed the book from him and opened the door, walking back into the room, grabbing water and sitting back down in your chair. The rest of the room were gathered in separate groups, probably discussing game plans, and your absence didn’t seem to have been a problem for anyone to bring up thankfully. A few minutes later, a more calm (and obviously now high) Eddie returned to his seat beside you and winked at you, giving you a sinking feeling in your stomach that felt like butterflies mixed with a bit more of a tornado feeling.

“Alright, everyone ready to keep on?” You interrupted their quiet discussions.

“Question is, can you two kids keep it in your pants till we’re through?” Dustin joked as he sat down.

“Ask her, she’s the one who-” you lightly slapped Eddie on the chest to shut him up.

“Excuse you.” You fussed at him and everyone groaned. “It was all him, I swear.”

They all settled down and got ready, and the next two hours flew by. Finally you were getting to the end, and you were really proud of how everyone had handled your twists and turns to the campaign. You stood up to announce the next twist, “As you’ve now successfully uncovered all of Elara’s tragic past, you’ve all ended your quest at her lair, of all places. Hundreds of undead minions are waiting for you to cross her. Will you turn around now, after all of this? Or will you fight?”

“We’re going to fight.” Dustin answered for the group.

“Your death.” Erica chimed in and you held in a little laugh.

You went to sit back down, only to be met with the lap of your boyfriend instead of the chair, and he wrapped his arms around your waist. No one let out a groan of grossness at this show of affection, so you leaned into it.

The game continued, “Elara summons even more undead creatures to attack you in her lair.” Everyone fought on, played their hardest that they could to defeat Elara, and you could feel Eddie beaming proudly behind you. “In a moment of redemption, Elara hesitates, a flicker of doubt crossing her face as she gazes upon those who have fought so bravely to stop her. In a final act of sacrifice, she uses her remaining power to banish the darkness that has consumed her and restore peace to the kingdom, her spirit finally finding peace as she fades into the shadows. Thanks to all of you heroes for bravely planning along tonight, and saving the kingdom from an eternity of darkness.” You raised your last sip of your glass at everyone as they cheered triumphantly at their win, and you felt Eddie place a sloppy kiss on your cheek. You could feel his hips slowly moving underneath your ass as you wrapped an arm around his shoulder and sat sideways. “Munson, calm down.”

“Can’t, gotta get some relief. I had to use you to hide it.” He pulled you in for a kiss and you heard a few of the younger “kids” groan out their ewws at your sign of affection, to which you both held up your middle fingers as you continued to kiss each other.

“Alright, we’ll meet again next week.” Eddie pulled back from the kiss abruptly, and loudly announced to the group. You furrowed your eyebrows at him, “I forgot to close out a few things for the store tonight because I was too excited about having a guest DM so we’ve gotta stay back and do that anyway. You all can go.” He pushed you off of his lap, quickly, and everyone left the room in groups or pairs, the same ones they arrived in. You were browsing the dark music store that only had a few neon lights and lamps on as everyone seemed to have disappeared.

“Could you have been any more obvious, Munson?” You asked as you felt a pair of arms wrap around you from behind.

“I reaaaaally don’t give a fuck what they know, or think.” He pushed your hair to the side and started kissing behind your ear and you leaned back into him. His hot breath tickled and you shivered, “I also reaaaaally don’t think I can wait till we get home.” His hand was traveling down your stomach and you felt his fingers playing with the hem of your mini skirt. You didn’t stop him as he danced it up higher on your thighs, your body weight leaning more and more into his chest. Your arms were hanging onto his neck as your skirt was now bunched up at your waist, and he was playing with the waistband of your panties.

“Here? S’dark in here but what if someone sees?”

“Don’t give a damn baby, it’s my store, my rules. Now bend over.” He smirked into your neck and pulled your ass against his hard dick, you could feel how thick he was through his jeans already. One of his hands was pulling your lace panties to the side, while his other was skillfully undoing his belt buckle. “You wore these tonight, were you expecting something?”

Honestly, you weren’t. You just hadn’t done laundry to have any other of your more normal underwear clean. “No, promise.”

His hand grabbed at your bare ass cheek and he pulled back and slapped it, “anyone could’ve seen these, you know that, right?” You smirked at his possessiveness, it felt different than when your ex had been possessive. You knew Eddie was proud of you, and you also knew how talkative he was when he was this turned on, so you just let him keep going. You nodded to go along and felt his fingers tease your entrance. “Oh fuck, you’re so wet. I’m surprised you didn’t leave a mark on my jeans.” He lazily rubbed his fingers between the lips of your pussy, and you arched your back to beg for more than what he was giving you, pressing your hands into the wooden record display for support.

“Fuck, stop teasing me.” You looked back and saw him smirking, as he unzipped his jeans and let them slide down his thighs. He started lazily stroking up and down his dick, matching the pace of his slow fingers that were touching you earlier.

“You should know all about teasing, shouldn’t you? Grinding your ass on me, leaning over that fucking table tonight so I could just almost see what I wanted. Wanted to shove that skirt up and lick you clean tonight.” He stroked himself quicker and quicker, “You ready for me, babe?” He asked as he teased your entrance with his hard length, and you whimpered as he teased you with an inch or so, then pulled back out. He kept on a few times until you’d had enough and you thrust your hips back to take his whole length, making him grab onto your hips. “Fuck yeah,” Eddie grunted as he fucked into you and steadied your hips. The store was quiet except the low humming of the neon lights, and your quiet, low moans.

He pulled your hair in a makeshift ponytail with his hands and yanked your head up to his. “You drive me crazy, baby, do you know that? Can’t believe you’re mine after all these years.” He was relentless as he pounded into you, a skilled hand snaking around your front and circling your clit to bring you to your height of pleasure.

You felt yourself clenching around him as he kept a steady pace, and you came quickly before he followed suit, and allowing himself to collapse onto you.

“Goddamn, I can’t last more than a few minutes with you ever, can I?” You could feel his cheeks warm against your back as he chuckled and twitched inside.

“It’s fine, really. You’ve made up for it plenty of other times.” He let out a sharp sigh as he pulled out of you, and helped you fix your outfit and then his own. You both were smirking at each other as you wandered around the store.

“Ready to go?” He asked as he swung the keys around his pointer finger.

“I thought you had to- you’re such a bullshitter, Munson.” You realized he’d lied to everyone about needing to do something at the shop to get everyone to leave earlier.

“Maybe so, Harrington, maybe so.” He opened the door for you and you followed out after he finished locking the doors to the music store.

“They trust you with this?” You eyed your brother as you helped him scoot the grill out onto the patio around the pool.

“Mom and dad barely use it, so I taught myself how to a while ago.”

“Shocked that you haven’t burned the house down yet.” You muttered to him and he rolled his eyes back in return. It was an oddly warm fall Sunday, so you (Steve) had decided to have everyone over for a pool party, which you were sure would turn into a night party too. Absent parents were a plus sometimes, and you had Monday off of work because your dad had decided to close for the day.

You were both busy setting up the food and drinks in the kitchen when someone rang the doorbell, so you jogged to the front door to let them in.

In a line, all of the “kids” walked in, Dustin being last and giving you a high five as if you were Steve. You could tell they felt comfortable here as they piled in and made themselves comfortable before heading out back.

“We just… let them party?” You asked, coming around the kitchen corner to your brother.

“Nah, maybe a beer or two but they know the rules. I’m still the babysitter a little bit. Where’s Eddie?”

You shrugged, he was supposed to be here early to help you two get ready but he was either early, or late- never on time, but it was unusual that you hadn’t heard from him. “Must be running late.”

Steve raised an eyebrow at you as he sliced tomatoes. “What?” He asked as you eyed him.

“Just, not like him, that’s all.” You watched as he arranged the tomatoes and lettuce on a plate for burgers. “Alright, what do you know? You’ve never been so precise about where toppings for a burger go on a plate. I really don’t see anyone who’s coming even putting a vegetable on their burger.” You crossed your arms and leaned your hip against the counter.

“Nothing.” He moved on to cutting up an onion, and you snatched the knife from his hand.

“Steve.” He said your name back to you in the same sassy tone. “What do you know?”

He sighed, “He didn’t wanna come because it’s a pool party, and he’s nervous about everyone seeing his scars. So he said he was gonna say something came up with the store so he didn’t have to come, then come later tonight.”

You frowned, you felt bad for Eddie because he was so sensitive about his appearance. Everyone knew what they were from, but you guessed that no one had seen him since the wounds had healed, he didn’t strike you as the shirtless guy at a pool type even before, but especially now.

“I’m gonna go call him really quick, can you handle everything for a minute?” You asked Steve as you handed him his knife back, and he seemed to be finishing up any prep work that needed to be done.

The phone line rang three times as you sat on your bed waiting for someone to pick up.

“Hello?” It was Wayne, which took you by surprise.

“Hey uncle Wayne, it’s me. Is Eddie there?”

“Yeah, he’s practicin’ right now. Want me to get him for you?”

“Please.” You chewed on your lip, debating telling him it’s an emergency to hopefully have a better chance at getting him on the phone but you didn’t want to add to any anxiety he already has. You heard multiple footsteps before you heard the phone cord clinking against the plastic phone.

“Hey baby.” He sounded sweet and… oblivious?

“Hey, are you coming over? Steve’s about to get the grill going I think, and I’m kinda worried that he’s going to set something on fire, or give us all food poisoning.”

“I’m uh, I’m gonna come over later. Still practicing some today, and not really feeling like I wanna swim. Wayne’s home too and-”

“Steve told me you’re worried about everyone seeing your scars.” You blurted it out, immediately regretting it.

“I-I… yeah.” He sighed. You couldn’t see him, but you were willing to bet he was running his hand over his face and through his hair right now. “I know everyone’s got them, and they saw me all fucked up but, you know how I am.”

“Eddie, they’re your friends. And you don’t have to even swim, just come hang out with everybody. No ones gonna pressure you to swim.” You paced your room and looked out the back window of your room that overlooked the pool. Robin had arrived and was wearing a button up top, unbuttoned over her swimsuit. Steve was of course shirtless already with his swim trunks on, and all the younger kids were in the pool swimming. Nancy was in a cute striped one piece, and Jonathan had on shorts and a t-shirt. “Not everyone is swimming, and no ones gonna care if you don’t.”

“You really don’t think they’ll care?”

“No, Eddie. Come on over.”

He sighed, “Alright, give me a few minutes and I’ll leave. If I get pushed in, I’m blaming you.”

“Okay, you can fully blame me if someone else pushes you into the pool.” You laughed at him.

“Don’t wanna mess this hair up either, I’m actually having a really good hair day today.”

You giggled again at the thought of his mop of a mane getting wet from the pool, “I’m sure you are, every day is a good hair day for you.”

“Alright, Harrington.” He said, emphasizing the “hair”, “I’ll see you soon.” You hung up and ran down the stairs, and headed straight for the backyard.

“He’s coming but he’s not gonna swim, and please don’t push him in.” You said to your brother as he was crouched down getting the grill going, or at least attempting to.

“Thank god because I have no idea how to start this stupid thing.” He stood up and you were seeing his scars for the first time, too. The one on his face was obviously there and you were used to it, but it was so much smaller. You guys had been night swimming a few times since you had been home, but you hadn’t paid much attention or seen them like you could right now. He had one on the left of his abdomen that still looked pretty gnarly.

“I didn't realize how bad-”

“Yeah, it’s pretty bad, I know. Well, it was. I think just pretending they’re not there is the only way I can act like things are back to normal now.” He spoke softly as he pushed his sunglasses back up on his nose. “Gonna go grab a drink, you want one?”

“Just a water is fine for now.” You said as he walked away, the scars on his back just as pink as the ones on his front. You found Robin settled in on a pool chair and sat at the foot of her chair. She had already found a beer and was watching the kids play a game of chicken. Max and Lucas were very clearly about to win against Mike and Will.

“Your lover not gonna make it?”

“He’s on his way, he was a little hesitant to come over to swim.” You said, and Robin nodded, thankfully understanding what you were meaning without saying anything.

“I think he has the hardest time with it all because he thinks he should’ve died.” She said very bluntly, sitting back in the lounger. Steve walked over and tossed you a water, then returned back to the grill. “Like, he actually did. And the scars are just another reminder- as if any of us need one, and I don’t think he wants to be a burden and make anyone remember it anymore than we already do, you know?” You nodded, realizing again how little you had understood about what everyone had been through while you were gone, despite hearing so much about it all from them. “He had it the worst of us, but you know that. Steve was pretty fucked up too. He waited until Eddie was even somewhat stable before he got himself looked at, they could have patched him up way better but he wouldn’t leave his side.”

“What?”

“Oh yeah. Days. He spent days after we’d all been evaluated, cleaned up, stitches or whatever we needed before he said that he needed any medical attention other than what we could see on his face. Nancy finally told him he smelled like blood and sweat and needed to go before he ended up with an infection. I'm still not convinced he didn’t get rabies from those bats... She had to pry him away from Eddie’s bedside. Steve said he felt responsible for him dying, because Eddie sacrificed himself to save him for you.” She was staring out at the pool still, talking about all of this as if it were some lighthearted conversation, and you were left speechless. “When the doctors got their hands on Steve they couldn’t believe how much pain he was in for that many days and didn’t even flinch because he was so good at hiding it, but when they asked him to lie back on the hospital bed to get looked at, he was crying in pain. It was pitiful.”

You still didn’t know what to say as you fumbled with your water bottle. “I hate that I wasn’t here.”

“No, don’t say that. I mean, I hate that you were where you were, but you didn’t want to be here. In Hawkins, or the upside down.”

“I just wish I could’ve been there for them more. Anyone. You guys are so close and I feel like I’m just invading on this, and adding more to it all.”

“No, you’re good for everyone. You being back has helped Steve, and obviously Eddie too. That idiot is crazy about you. When he woke up and found out what had happened to the town, the first thing he asked about was some book in his trailer that none of us knew what he was talking about until Wayne got there after Steve called him to tell him his vitals were improving drastically.”

“What book was it?” You asked, not sure what he could’ve been talking about.

“We all thought he meant his copy of The Hobbit but he was talking about some dungeons and dragons notebook.” Your heart stopped as Robin rambled on longer, for minutes before you realized you weren’t listening at all.

You two settled into a normal conversation, but you kept thinking about the notebook that Eddie was worried in the back of your head until he arrived, he made a quiet entrance versus his usual display of dramatics. He was dressed in a ripped up, sleeveless Slayer tshirt and a very holey pair of black jeans, and a pair of black converse that you rarely saw him in. His hair was tied back loosely and he had a black bandana around his head too. You stopped mid sentence with Robin as you watched him gravitate towards Steve as if he automatically knew he needed help.

“Man, you’ve got it bad for Munson, don’t you?”

“Shut it, Robin.” You slapped her ankle playfully and she laughed at you.

“Have you guys said the l word yet?”

You looked at him again before looking over to her, “No, it hasn’t been that long yet.” You knew Robin was such a romantic at heart- she thought your story of two best friends torn apart, then reunited as “lovers” was the best plot for a romantic story.

“Hasn’t been that long?! You guys were friends for how long before this? And you both knew you had something for each other this whole time?! Come on!” She threw her hands up in the air. “Just say it and see what he says.”

Except, you knew how Eddie felt about the word. There were some things some people- most people actually, didn’t know about his life before he was living with Wayne full time. The only time he heard the word love and it actually meant something was his mom, and he didn’t hear it but a few times from her. And if his dad ever said it, it was when he was quite literally beating love into him. It was a subject you weren’t really ready to introduce into your relationship yet, and you didn’t want to be the one to push it on him either. You were following the cracks of the concrete around the pool until a pair of unlaced shoes caught your attention.

Eddie squatted down to your level of the pool chair and lifted your chin up with his two fingers before placing the most gentle kiss on your lips. “Hi.” He said, his cheeks rosy, and his eyes were a little bit bloodshot to match.

“Hi.” You giggled back, “You okay?”

“Smoked on the way over here, never been better.”

“I’ll leave you two alone, have at it.” Robin got up, abandoning her chair. Eddie replaced her at the top of the chair and motioned for you to scoot up between his legs. You settled with your back on his chest, as his arms wrapped around your body.

“Glad you decided to come. I missed you.” You said as you traced the faint scars on his forearms that were showing.

“Just saw me last night at the show, Harrington. But thanks for making me come here, I think it’ll be good.”

“I didn’t make you come here,” you defended, “I was just trying to get you out of the house and that head of yours for a bit.”

“I know.” He kissed the side of your head, “and I’m thanking you for it.” You’d half expected him to retort back with some type of a half argument comment like he was actually trying to say that you did force him to come here, but you could tell he genuinely was glad to be there. You snuggled in closer to him.

“I think your meds are working, you normally would have said something a little smarter than that back to me.” You said out loud.

“Yeah, I feel less on edge all the time now. ‘S kinda nice.” He hummed.

“Should you be smoking weed while you’re taking it?” You feel him shrug against you. “Guess we’ll find out.”

“Guess we will.” He said.

“I need to run upstairs and change, keep an eye on Steve to make sure he doesn’t burn anything, please.”

“You sure you don’t need any assistance?” He wiggled his eyebrows at you and you rolled your eyes as you made your way back inside to change into your swimsuit.

The first one you grabbed was an older black one that was a two piece bikini, you were a bit less curvy back in high school but you figured it would still fit. You slipped the bottoms and the top on and stared at yourself in the mirror. Your shape had changed so much, not necessarily for the worse by any matter, but you could hear the comments from your mom or Charlie in your head as you took yourself in from every angle in the mirror.

A soft knock rapped on the door, then it slowly opened and you weren’t one bit surprised to see Eddie there. His jaw was slack as he stuttered out a compliment. “Y-you look great.”

You blushed and tucked your arms in front of your tummy, attempting to hide your few pounds, suddenly feeling ashamed.

“I mean it. You look healthy. I know what you’re thinking. I haven’t forgotten what your mom used to say to you. I haven’t either.” He closed the door quietly behind him, then walked over towards you.

“How come I have to be the one confident about my body, but you get to hide yours?” You asked him as he enveloped you in a warm hug and rubbed your soft back.

“That’s a conversation I’m willing to have another day, sweetheart. You don’t have to swim either.”

“But I want to. All I have are bikinis though.”

“And you look fine in it.” He hugged you tighter, but then his arms dropped, “what’s that?”

“What’s what?” You pulled back to look at him and he was focused on your closet. “Oh, that’s just some old high school crap. C’mon, let’s go down to the pool so they don’t think we’re up to something.”

Eddie shook his head as he made his way over to your closet. He didn’t have to stand on his tiptoes to grab the shoebox from the top shelf of your closet. “I know exactly what this is.” He made himself comfortable on the floor of your room, and opened the lid. The laugh that escaped his lips almost sounded like a bit of a cry as he started to pick through the papers and pictures.

“C’mon, Eddie. I’m not in the mood for reliving the past right now.”

“Oh I am. Look at how cute we were.” He showed you a photo of the two of you, and some of your old friends from middle school. “God, I was such a nerd.”

“Was?” You asked as you sat down beside him and watched him carefully dig through your possessions. You watched as he pulled out each picture, most of them had a tiny hole in the corner from a push pin where they’d been displayed in your room. “Had to take all these down in 9th grade when I had my first sleepover with Grace. I didn’t want her to make fun of me. I don't think I’ve looked at any of them since.”

Your slightly shaky hand started to sift through the box too, finding a picture from your birthday party in 8th grade- the year your parents had the pool put in. Eddie was beside you, his arm loosely around your shoulder, and you were both grinning from ear to ear, everyone else at the party had smiles too, but none as bright as the two of yours. There was a picture stuck to the back of that one, and it was of you blowing out your birthday candles. Eddie was staring- yes, staring at you with nothing but admiration in his eyes. You realized then that Robin really was right about the two of you. Eddie had found a letter that you both would pass back and forth between classes and was smiling behind his hand as he read it, his eyes seemed to be shrink wrapped with tears ready to fall.

“Man, we were fucking clueless, weren’t we?” He said out loud.

You took a deep breath, “clueless to what?”

“Each other. I’m pretty sure I was in love with you back then.” He continued on, not realizing what he’d said.

“Back then?” You asked, picking at the corner of the picture in your hands.

“Yeah, back then. Look at this,” he pointed to a part of the letter and read it aloud to you as you giggled along. You didn’t want to ruin the moment so you went along with him as you continued pulling out old pictures and letters, some DnD notes, and random little trinkets.

Your heart was aching to say something to him but you didn’t want to press it, so you abruptly stood up and grabbed the box from him, putting the lid back in it.

“That’s enough for right now.” You stood on your tippy toes to place the box back in the top of your closet, where dust had settled around the edges of it for sitting in the same spot for so long.

“I can’t believe you kept all those. Even after the years you were so mean to me.” Eddie came up behind you and took the box from your hands and effortlessly returned it to its place.

“You know me, I keep everything.” You were a little nervous now, not sure where the conversation was going.

“What about pictures of him?” Eddie asked, his voice laced with disgust.

“Eddie, come on. You really think I’d keep any of him? I threw all the ones I had out in Chicago, and Steve got all of the ones out of the house before I made it home.”

“I’m shocked he didn’t make you burn your pictures with me.” He scoffed, pacing around your room.

“He didn’t know I had those.” You watched him scratch at his neck as he kept pacing. “Hey, Eddie?”

“Yeah?”

“While we’re on the subject of keeping things… Robin told me that my DnD notebook was one of the first things you asked about after you woke up.”

“Yeah, I was worried that you would kill me if we ever talked again and I’d lost it.”

“Lost it? Eddie, I didn’t even know that thing still existed until you showed it to me.”

“Well. It’s the one thing that I had of you, of yours that was still… you. You know? You just switched in freshman year to this completely different girl desperate to fit in. I tried calling you, but your mom always made up whatever excuse you told her. Cheerleading practice, or at Grace’s house, or whatever it was. Finally I just gave up after you started looking at me with disgust at school if we saw each other. Then your sophomore year I knew I was never going to get you back, you were long gone.”

“But I’m back now.” You said quietly.

“Yeah, but at what cost?” He let out a disparaging smile, “You were with that abusive piece of shit for all of those years, and I was here rotting in Hawkins, being the freak of the town and then almost dying. Now you’re back, and you’re just… you’re back in my life again. But nothing is the same.” He sounded defeated.

You looked at him with tears in your eyes, and you felt your heart crumpling down.

“Eddie, I’m sorry.”

“Everyone is. Everyone is so sorry about what happened, aren’t they?”

“Eddie, please.” You grabbed his arm as he tried to walk out. He pulled it away from you, then turned to face you.

“I loved you, but you didn’t see it. You didn’t care, you just wanted to be the popular girl, you wanted everyone to love you. Sweetheart, none of those people did, except me.”

“I never told my mom to make up lies about where I was. I didn’t know you ever tried to call me. I thought you hated me for joining the cheerleading team.”

“Hate you? I could never hate you. Fuck- all of that bullshit you said to me in high school and look where we’re at now.” His chest was heaving, and you were feeling woozy from the emotional whiplash of the conversation.

“Where are we now?” You asked, afraid of the answer. Eddie’s hands slowly reached up to your face, and he didn’t miss the tiny flinch you made as you realized he was about to touch you.

“I think you know where I’m at.” His hands were resting on either side of your jaw, and his thumbs were slowly moving in circles as he looked you in the eyes, searching for something. “I said I could never hate you, didn’t I?” You nodded slowly at him, “it’s because I never stopped loving you.”

He leaned in and placed a gentle kiss on your lips before pulling back and resting his forehead against yours.

“Eddie, I love you too.” You said, placing your hands over his and squeezing them. You watched as his eyes squeezed so hard that tears started falling.

“Don’t say it just because I said it. Don’t say it if you don’t mean it, you know-” he started getting himself riled up the more he spoke.

“I do know, and that’s why I’m saying it. I love you.” His eyes were still shut and he was breathing through his nose. “Look at me.” You grabbed his face to move it to yours and watched as his eyes opened up. “I can’t say it enough, I love you, Eddie.” He leaned in after he accepted your confession and kissed you again, still a quick kiss, but so much feeling behind it. “And I promise you, all of those people out there love you too. But not… not as much as I do.”

He smiled at you before grabbing your hand and leading you downstairs, and back out to the pool. To your surprise, no one made any comments about the two of you being gone together, and not as much time must have passed as you thought because Steve was just putting burgers and some chicken on the grill. Eddie kissed the side of your head before he went to the cooler for a beer and resumed his stand beside your brother.

Alright, you confessed your love to him, so why do you feel like you could hurl up the last 3 days worth of food as you stared at him?

“Grabbing a beer, you want one?” Nancy placed a hand on your shoulder and asked as she walked by you standing on the hot concrete, and you nodded a quick yes to her.

“Thanks.” You said as she handed one back to you.

“You alright? You look a little bit sick to your stomach.”

“Yeah, just hanging in there. We had another one of those big conversations and I feel a little off.”

“C’mon, walk it off and come sit over here with us and forget about it for a minute.” You followed her over to where Jonathan and Robin both were talking in depth about some movie ending and why it should’ve ended differently.

“Hey guys.” You sat down, sharing a chair with Robin again. You started drinking your beer quickly as they changed the conversation and you joined in as you heard laughter and splashing in the background. Minutes later, it all stopped. Everything. The laughing, the splashing, and any noise other than the few birds that were still around.

You four looked to the pool. Everyone’s head was accounted for, and then you looked over at the grill where Steve was laughing as he flipped a burger. Steve, just Steve. Where was Eddie? Suddenly you were being lifted up by a very cold, wet body and were getting thrown into the pool, beer in hand and all.

“What the fuck?!” You said as you came up from the water. Eddie was also… in the pool with you. Shirtless, but his jeans on.

“Dustin made a bet and I had to follow up on my end.” He swooped an arm around your waist and pulled you into him. “Love you.” He kissed you on the lips before he let go of you and swam to the side of the pool. He pushed himself out of the water, making a show of his wet hair, then pulled his jeans off to be left just in his boxers.

“Hey man, put some trunks on.” Steve yelled at him before putting the lid down on the grill and running inside. He jogged back out with a pair of his red ones and tossed them at Eddie’s chest, “for your decency.” He said with a smirk, and Eddie put them on and hopped in the pool with everyone else, and a fresh beer for you.

#eddie munson #stranger things #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x harrington!reader #eddie munson smut #eddie munson x you #eddie munson stranger things #stranger things fanfic #stranger things fanfiction #stranger things season 4

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mysteryshoptls · 2 hours

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SSR Divus Crewel - Rich Fur Coat Vignette

"A full course of disciplinary action"

[Sage‘s Island – Foothill Town]

Sage’s Island Resident: Good morning, Divus-san. You're up pretty early again.

Crewel: Good morning, madam.

Crewel: Also… Good morning, Emma!

Crewel: Your cute spots look so good on you, as always. I am truly lucky to be able to meet with such a stunning beauty so early in the day.

Crewel: …Can I give you some pets, you sweet thing?

Emma: Bark, bark!

Sage’s Island Resident: Fufufu, you're always so doting on our Emma, thank you. Look, she's so happy she's showing her belly.

Crewel: No, I should be thanking you. These fleeting moments I get in the morning are my personal solace.

Crewel: I'm grateful that I am able to see and pet these beautiful little lads and lasses.

Crewel: Especially since I'm unable to see my precious ones until I return to the Queendom of Roses on the weekends.

Sage’s Island Resident: If I recall, you have two friends looking after your dogs back home during the week, right?

Crewel: That's right. They're old friends… Or rather, they've become more like hired hands.

Crewel: I would love nothing more than to bring my dogs to Sage's Island…

Crewel: But my apartment here in Foothill Town is much too small to keep them.

Crewel: Sometime in the future, it would be nice to rent a large home here in this town and live with them together every single day.

Crewel: I'd drive with them in my favorite car on the long road along the ocean… That's the dream.

Sage’s Island Resident: Well, how lovely. I'm looking forward to the day that I'll be able to meet your precious dogs, Divus-san.

Crewel: And I as well, madam. I hope you have another pleasant day today. Bye, Emma.

Crewel: Good morning, my good sir. A strong cup of tea, as per my usual.

Shopkeep: Good morning, Crewel-kun. Would you like some food with that?

Crewel: No, thank you. I don't eat breakfast, as a rule.

Shopkeep: Yes, yes, I know. I thought I'd just ask.

Shopkeep: I can't believe you come to my little establishment so early in the morning just to drink tea instead of our signature coffee blend…

Shopkeep: You're still an odd one, even after becoming a professor at Night Raven College.

Crewel: Hah. Truth be told, I don't come here for the tea.

Crewel: Every Monday morning, if I sit in this seat here, I can watch the ships sail into port. The sight of the sails in a row is beautiful…

Crewel: This tea doesn't even compare to the stuff I can brew, but this view is something I can't replicate back home.

Shopkeep: Hahah! I always knew you were a sharp-tongued devil in your student years, but it seems you've just gotten even more cruel!

Crewel: I think it's more of a shock that you haven't improved your tea brewing skills in 15 years, sir.

Shopkeep: Well, luckily, we're still thriving! Do enjoy your time here.

Crewel: Thanks. …Hm. This respite is quiet and soothing.

Crewel: I should relax while I can. …Because I'm sure today will end up being yet another busy day.

Crewel: Today, I have homeroom plus three other classes. There's also preparations that need to be done for next month's event, a staff meeting, and last week's tests that need grading… Whew.

Crewel: Well. I'll just have to hope those pups won't cause me any issues, at a minimum.

[Laboratory]

Crewel: STAY!!!

Students: EEK!

Crewel: I can't believe this… What have you done?

Crewel: Why are all the ingredients needed for today's experiment scattered all over the floor?

Crewel: Which one of you mangy mutts not only stepped on but also mixed together all those spilled ingredients?

Crewel: I am only asking a simple question, and yet all anyone can yelp is "It wasn't me," or "It was someone else's fault"...

Crewel: PUPS WHO CAN'T OWN UP TO THEIR MISTAKES ARE NO BETTER THAN A MUTT! THEY DON'T EVEN DESERVE TO BE CALLED DOGS!

Students: EEEEP!

Crewel: So tell me, who is the culprit? Tell me truthfully, and you'll only have to deal with a full course of disciplinary action and not a bit more.

Students: Th-That is…

Students: [everyone stares]

Grim: Hm?

Grim: …Wh-Wh-Wh-What? Don't all you be lookin' down on me!

1. I think it'd be better if you just apologize honestly… 2. You'll get a lighter punishment if you just confess now.

Grim: It wasn't me who did that! It's [Yuu], definitely [Yuu]!

Scarabia Student: Don't try to blame [Yuu]. You really don't know how to give up, huh, Grim!

Octavinelle Student: Yeah, you were the one who flipped the table in the first place! There's no way I'm gonna let you take us down with you!

Grim: Heh! Do ya even got any proof that I did it?

Crewel: I see. It definitely won't do to accuse someone of the crime without proper evidence.

Crewel: …By the way, Grim.

Grim: Hm?

Crewel: The fur on your legs have turned black, but why is that? It looks just like that of a black cat.

Grim: Huh? My legs?

Grim: …Woah, you're right! My amazing grey fur's pitch black!

Grim: WH-WHAT'S WITH THIS!? GET RID OF IT FOR MEEE!

Crewel: There's no point in wiping it. The sap from the tree we were to use today turns black upon exposure to air.

Crewel: If it were to touch on your clothes or hair, it wouldn't matter how much you scrub or wash with water, it won't come off.

Crewel: incidentally, to return the blackened part to normal, the fastest method would be to cause another reaction to render it colorless.

Crewel: Look! Everyone see here.

Crewel: When I pour this concoction of herbs onto Grim's blackened legs…

Crewel: See, it returned back to its normal color. Make sure you remember this reaction.

Students: Oooooh.

Crewel: …Now, Grim. Do you have any idea why the ingredients we were to use for today's experiments got on your legs?

Grim: M-M… MYAAAH!

Grim: It ain't my fault! The desk shouldn't've been there!

Crewel: YOU MONGREL! YOU ARE TO STAY AFTER CLASS AND COPY LINES AS PUNISHMENT. UNDERSTAND!?

Crewel: And [Yuu], you're to also stay behind, as Grim's prefect. It would be troublesome if you cannot even look after your own pet!

1. But I have plans after class…

Crewel: Oho, you have plans that take priority over my prescribed discipline? [Yuu shakes their head] …No? A good response from a good boy.

2. I'm sorry…

Crewel: If you truly are sorry, then lets see that as a tangible result. If you can make Grim learn to sit and stay properly as his prefect, then I'll give you a treat.

Crewel: These pups truly are a handful… My beloved pet dogs are much more well behaved.

Crewel: Everyone, sit!

[Crewel magics the ingredients]

Grim: All the stuff I dropped are just floating back on top of the desk. So why's he gotta get on me when he can just fix everything…?

Crewel: The ingredients have been properly prepared once again. I will now explain the procedure for this experiment, so make sure you watch carefully.

Crewel: …I expect all of you to be on your best behavior.

Grim: Urp. He's just glaring at me, now…

[Interior Hallway]

Crewel: Ah, classes are finally over. Today was another tiring day.

Crewel: None of the freshmen listen and the sophomores slack off now that they've gotten used to the classes. And the juniors are teeming with arrogance.

Crewel: If I were a student, I would absolutely have literally knocked some sense into them...

Crewel: However, because of my position, I cannot do that now. I never even thought that I would be more inconvenienced as a professor, than I was as a student.

Crewel: Tch! I knew what I was in for, but still, I hadn't expected being an instructor to be this difficult.

???: And why are you clicking your tongue like that, Crewel-sensei?

Trein: As a professor of this school, I would prefer if you were to carry yourself better, so as to be a good example towards the students.

Crewel: Ugh… And now on top of everything else, someone even fussier has shown up…

Trein: What is with that disgruntled look? Do you take some issue with me?

Crewel: Of course not, don't be absurd! I would never bite back at any commentary you have for me, Trein-sensei.

Trein: Good. We should start to head towards the staff meeting, then.

Trein: Incidentally, you seemed to look rather exhausted a moment ago. Did something happen?

Crewel: No, I wouldn't say there was anything in particular…

Crewel: …I was only thinking of how I could effectively train the students. There are more than a fair share of unruly pups.

Trein: Do you of all people have any right to say that…? Especially since you were one of the rowdiest students during your time here.

Crewel: That was simply youthful ardor. Wasn't I just a charming little thing?

Trein: Don't write it off as simple "youthful ardor." Have a little shame.

Trein: …Well, I suppose it hasn't been too long since you've become a professor, in the end. This year makes… how long?

Crewel: Six years. Have you forgotten our joyous reunion already?

Trein: Hmph. Of course I remember your scowling little, "Oh, professor, were you still here?"

Trein: But only six years, I see… Well, why don't you pat yourself on the back for doing as well as you are for such a short tenure?

Crewel: I'm doing well? …Do you truly think so?

Trein: It is a fact that the rate of students pursuing the sciences have increased since you've arrived. There would be no purpose in denying that your instruction is showing good results.

Crewel: Heh… Heheh, is that right?! Well, I certainly wasn't expecting that coming from you.

Trein: And there you go getting carried away and speaking without any forethought. I do believe I've taught you countless times since your time here as a student to respect your elders, haven't I?

Trein: …Now then, if you're feeling better about yourself, we should get this staff meeting underway. I am keeping Lucius waiting.

[Trein walks off]

Crewel: …How insensitive of you, Trein-sensei.

Crewel: Here I am, patiently enduring everything until I can finally go see my dogs over the weekend, and you say that.

[Alchemy Workshop]

Crewel: Now that the meeting is done with, I should try to finish grading the tests while I can.

Crewel: …The rate of students pursuing the sciences, hm. I suppose it's true that everyone's grades are improving, even if at a slow pace. …A truly slow pace.

Crewel: Heh. I do enjoy seeing these pups grow.

[knock, knock, click]

Grim: Hey! I went 'n did that assignment for ya!

Crewel: What is it that you've done for me...?

1. I'll have him try that again. 2. He just misspoke!

Grim: I-I mean, I finished the assignment ya gave me. I'll put it here on the desk, 'kay?

Grim: …Hm? There's a book with a fancy cover mixed in with all these boring lookin' books. What's this?

Crewel: Oh, did that catch your eye? That book contains the collection of an apparel brand I worked for in the past.

Crewel: I keep telling them to not send anything to my office, but are some who just refuse to listen…

Crewel: Not only do I receive their catalogs, but also phone calls, all asking for my advice for the next fashion season.

Crewel: …It's just like your tests, don't you think? I'll have to fix their mistakes later to the best of my abilities.

Grim: Urgh, that sounds annoying. Why don'tcha just ignore 'em?

Crewel: Ignore them… Hahah, that's one idea. I can imagine their panicked and frantic faces.

Crewel: …But no, I do consider this somewhat of a hobby for me.

Crewel: Just because I've become a professor, that does not mean I can fall behind the current fashion. I want to constantly be checking the latest trends.

Crewel: I'm sure even you'd prefer a fashionably cool instructor over some decrepit, antiquated teacher, right?

1. I want a cool teacher.

Crewel: Right? You're quite a lucky one on that account, pup, because you have me as your homeroom teacher!

2. I want a nice teacher.

Crewel: You'll get bored if they're just nice all the time, you know. You might understand what I mean when you get a bit older.

Grim: I don't really get all that hard fashion stuff, but I totally wanna look cooler!

Crewel: Well, I'll consider that good enough for now. Don't you worry, I'll make sure to turn you into polished gems before graduation.

Crewel: You students here at Night Raven College may have a knack for magic, but your fashion senses are severely lacking.

Crewel: …And since I've taken on the duties of being your teacher, I won't allow that to continue.

Crewel: When I first started here, I vowed that I would craft every single one of you into the most fashionable and capable mages you can be.

Crewel: You have a first-class instructor, and first-rate instruction. …It would be impossible for you all to not become fantastic mages.

Grim: Heh. I'm totally gonna become a great mage even without your help!

Crewel: Hahah, you're a cheeky one. …Now then, if you've finished your task, go on. Looks like your friends have arrived to walk you out.

Crewel: Your time as a student may seem long, but it is deceptively short. I will do what I can to support all of you so that you can live your life here without any regrets.

#twisted wonderland #twst #divus crewel #mozus trein #grim #twst crewel #twst trein #twst grim #twst yuu #twst translation #mention: lucius

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blondehya · 2 days

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GIRL I NEED MIZU BEING A BULLY IN COLLEGE (she actually isn't, it's just rumors because of her aura, people are kinda scared of her) she's like tall, arm with tattoos, rides a motorcycle, sunglasses, leather jacket, WHO WOULDN’T BE SCARED????

So she has a secret crush on reader (who is also a little bit afraid of her based on the rumors) who is the complete opposite of her. So Mizu tries to be kind (even though it's hard and she's a nervous mess)

OMG BEST REQUEST I’VE EVER RECEIVED I LOVE YOU SO MUCH 😭

you were at that school long enough to know the single most important thing: stay away from mizu, always, that girl means problem.

many people believe that she is respected a lot, but she is just feared. being a tall girl, tattooed arms, and driving a motorcycle is enough to make people’s head going down while she passes. who wouldn't be afraid?

“hi, excuse me. i’m here to bring my absence certificate from friday.”

“hello sweetie! give me a minute.”

you wait patiently for the inspector to sort things out, and before leaving he calls you.

“wait, your geography teacher had to leave, so you should go to the history class right now. hush, it already started.”

you thank him and run in a clumsy way to the history classroom, and calmly open the door.

“please, come in. you can sit with mizu right there.”

everything seemed to go in slow motion. the slightly laugh of some students, and the pitying faces of others. of course, the chair with her had to be the only one free! you approach and sit down, apprehensive.

the thought of looking at her flashes through.

come on, say hi or make a sign so you don't get into trouble with her later!

you move your head towards her, smile and nods trying to say hello. she just looks at you and returns her attention to the teacher seconds later. what if she didn’t liked you?!

oh, for sure i am in trouble… what if that sign means something rude in her country?!

the teacher starts to speak again.

“since this material is over, let's ask some review questions to see if everyone understood.” she pauses for a second. “you know what? i will pick according to the numbers on the attendance list.”

several students sigh in sadness. i feel relieved in fact. i believe that i studied a good part of the content. i quickly look at mizu, she looks like a statue... wow!

“who is number… eighteen?”

“me, miss.”

the boy stands up in his chair and waits for the questions. he responds clearly and satisfies the teacher.

“number seven?”

being taken out of my thoughts, i stand up confident and i look at the teacher smiling.

“paleolithic japanese incorporates the oldest known polished stone tools in the world. this technology is associated with the beginning of the neolithic, which takes place in what time?”

fuck you, fuck me, fuck everyone!

what kind of question is that?!

“ah… it’s b.c right?” her expression changes. several students start whispering and laughing at you.

my heart starts racing and i feel like i'm going to fall ov—

huh?

did mizu just put her leg against mine?

she wants me to get distracted and fail at everything! i’m just gonna ignore it.

but why is she placing both hands clearly open on her thighs…

it couldn’t be…

“ten thousand before christ…?”

“yes! correctly lady!”

you sit in the chair again in disbelief, and happy with the teacher’s smile. your gratitude hides all the thoughts that previously hovered in your mind. you get close to mizu and whispers:

“thank you so much, i owe you one for saving me.”

for the first time she looks at you and... and smiles... mizu can actually smile, and what a beautiful vision you think.

“it’s nothing. no need to thank me.”

her voice is actually so pretty… it has nothing scary. why would people call her scary?

you think to yourself.

the class continues without worries and finally comes to an end.

“bye, mizu!” you say in a proud tone. you were proud to know now that she wasn’t that scary bully monster everyone calls her.

“ah, wait a minute, please. you were the only person who talked with me in ages. so… you don’t find me weird or anything…?”

“i was a fool influenced by rumors. you are a good person, mizu. i am sorry for everything.”

ah…

why is she BLUSHING?!

she scratches her head nervously.

“haha… good to know... so, do you want my number? like, so we can talk more, not that i want to ask you out. in fact, i want to, but not now.”

you look at her surprised.

“i’m so sorry… you were the only one who talked to me in ages without that strange scared fece. i thought we could at least talk more.”

“of course we can!” you smile to her.

you exchange numbers and start to get close. very close to a level where she picks you up and drops you off at home every day with her motorcycle.

“hi hon, it’s cold today. hold on tight.”

you do as she says. mizu’s body is bigger and of course more warm, it’s like your own big plushie to squeeze and hug. and it’s no longer a secret to anyone. everyone at school knows you two are inseparable now.

“taigen asked me if we are dating…” you declare this, lying in her arms on the lawn.

“huh? how could he?” she puts her leg over yours.

and you guys stayed at it for a few months. until mizu takes you to her favorite place on her motorcycle, and asks you to date her there.

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problemchildtm · 3 days

Text

Demolition

Derek Morgan x bau!reader

Angst/fluff~ 1.9k words

Warnings: Attachment issues, mentions of childhood trauma, bullying, self deprecating thoughts, suffering in silence (none specific), barely proofread, as always lmk if there’s more

A/n: My attempt at @reiderwriter ‘s 5K challenge. I started with one idea in mind then it kinda spiraled so this is the result. I’m still learning about writing so bear with me. This was so fun and congrats on 5K!!!!

Prompts: Grumpy x sunshine, Oh. OH, idiots in love maybe idk???

“She didn’t understand why, but faced with those decaying buildings and straggled grasses, she was nothing but a child who had never truly lived.”

Offputting, standoffish, rude: all words used to describe your demeanor and/or personality. A combination of these and more have run through your head for so long they’ve become a backtrack to your innermost thoughts. Though these were common sentiments thrown in your direction, you had little confidence in them. The words were hurled by people who would never truly know you nor make it past the walls you’ve so carefully created. No one has succeeded or even tried to climb the barriers until Derek Morgan. You’ve been with the Bau for a little over two years and while the majority of the team learned to accept your cold demeanor, Derek continues his attempt to coax you out of your shell. It’s not like you’re hostile, you just don’t go out of your way to be nice. Rather than converse and joke with the team you sit by yourself in silence. You speak when spoken to and refuse to drag out conversations or engage in small talk. The behavior was disheartening but necessary for your survival. Each action had an intention and they all boiled down to being averse to attachments. Small talk led to hangouts, hangouts led to friendships, friendships led to attachments, and attachments always led to heartbreak. Never once has an attachment left you feeling fulfilled. You’d been a witness to this fact a plethora of times and were determined to prevent the effects happening to you. It took some time but almost everyone eventually gave up their missions to get to know you. Almost everyone.

Derek Morgan was sickengly sweet to you. Every morning he insisted on making your first cup of coffee and every morning a note was left on that cup. Affirmations like “Good things are coming your way” or “You are a priority.” Honestly, it sounded straight out of a fortune cookie. It was dorky and inefficient yet you found yourself keeping every note. Not because you enjoyed them or found comfort in them or anything it would just be rude to throw it away. Right? Right. And it didn’t end with the notes. He’d personally drop off the note-adorned coffee and try to strike up a conversation. You’d always give a polite thank you and that was it. Well, there was one time you actually engaged with him and you swore he never smiled that hard before. Both the smile and conversation seemed to last the whole day and the ones following. His incessant need to speak and be around you should’ve annoyed you to no end but it almost made you open up. Almost. The second you felt the reins attached to your defense mechanisms loosen you immediately tightened them. They were there for a reason and somehow Derek Morgan made you want to loosen them. Under no circumstances would you give in. So, for the foreseeable future, you’d suffer in silence and suppress the urge to be unconditionally yourself in his presence.

You persisted in rejecting Derek’s attempts to get closer to you and it hurt. Why did it hurt? Unfortunately Fortunately, the upcoming case gave you no time to think about that one. Walking into the conference room, you never expected the image on the screen. It was a map of a familiar area, aka your hometown. Clearly, hiding a rare emotion in a room of profilers was futile because every single one of them asked if you were okay- even Garcia. Frozen in shock you could only muster up “hometown.” The answer seemed to appease them but you could sense the pity floating around the room. Derek gently grabbed your hand and led you to the seat beside him, grounding you. The gesture was followed by the signature Derek Morgan smile that was reserved for you. In return, you offered a small smile back and got into the case. His lingering eyes and overall concern went unnoticed by the object of his affections but caught the eye of every other person in that room. Thankfully the case was as straightforward as serial killers can be. It appeared to be cut-and-dry but everyone knew not to assume. Hypotheses and ideas were thrown back and forth between team members but you could only focus on the possibilities plaguing your mind. Taking notice of your unnaturally frightened air Derek carefully approached. “Wanna tell me what’s going through that pretty little head of yours?” Truthfully you didn’t know how to respond. What wasn’t going through your head more like? Understanding you couldn’t keep everything to yourself for the good of the case you started small. “A lot. I haven’t been there since I was sixteen and I wasn’t exactly well-liked.” Hanging on to your every word Derek continued, “Why not?” This time you didn’t respond, just kept staring out of the window. He was getting too close. You were getting too close. That wasn’t enough for him but he wouldn’t dare invade your boundaries; he cared too much to sacrifice the little progress he’s made. Before slipping on his headphones he remarked, “You don’t have to tell me but at least know I’m here and judgment-free.” This was going to be a long case.

The first few days were spent compiling evidence and chasing bodies as the case wasn’t as simple as previously thought. Each minute spent there was pulling at you. It felt like your body was constantly on fire, the only thing cooling you off being scribbles on a paper cup. The messages were less generic and more heartfelt. Unlike other mornings Derek backed off, giving you space to process your thoughts and notes. You missed the near-constant chatter and focused all your energy on the case, hoping it would return once on to the next. After a while, you had a lead. With Reid’s help the geographical profile was done and right in the center was a park you frequented as a kid. Maybe less than a park and more like a grass field surrounded by office buildings but tomato tomato. Hotch assigned you and Morgan to check it out so that’s what you went off to do. Should’ve known it wouldn’t be that easy. He looked over and smiled. “You gonna tell me the significance of this patch of grass or do I have to profile it out of you?” Rolling your eyes you relented. There was no point in dragging it. “I grew up poor and the local park charged entry. Every poor kid in the area would come here.” The look of shock on his face wasn’t missed despite his efforts to conceal it. “I’ve never heard of a park charging kids to play is that even legal?” “Unfortunately for you, I am not Reid and cannot give you an answer.” you chuckled. That was the first time he heard you laugh in any capacity and he was so determined to hear it again. “You should laugh more, it’s adorable.” Adorable? You’ve been called a lot of names in your life: by your parents, peers, teachers, superiors, you name it. Adorable has never been one of them. You spent a couple of seconds analyzing him. “You think I’m adorable?” At the end of your sentence, that smile reappeared. “Incredibly. Especially when you try not to smile at my jokes.” He said playfully. Dumbfounded, the only retort you had was honesty. “I don’t smile much anymore. I want to but I can’t.” “Why not?” As much as you wanted the conversation to continue, you couldn’t help but notice how different your childhood hotspot looked. While his eyes were still on you you jumped out of the SUV and took in your surroundings. It smelt different. Years ago it smelt like wonder. As hopeless as it sounds the area smelt like wonder. It felt like an entirely different reality. One you could escape to when things at home and school were bad and that was often if not continuously. It no longer felt like that. It felt cold, bare even. The childlike wonder was gone, the hope was gone, your escape was gone. Suddenly your eyes began to well with tears and the floodgates opened. "You didn't understand why, but faced with those decaying buildings and straggling grasses, you were nothing but a child who had never lived." The emotions overwhelmed every sense and the brass reality hit like a truck. All the walls, all the precautions stopped you from ever truly living. You clung onto that escape and depended on it, perpetually remaining the child that needed to come here to truly live. You wanted to be more open, you wanted to have friends and relationships, you wanted to be better.

Everything came to a head when Derek rushed over to you, frantically asking if you were okay. He’s never seen you cry. Before today he’s never seen you be anything other than complacent. The past fifteen minutes have been the most amount of emotions he’s seen from you and he didn’t know what to do or how to help. Worried, he stuck to a bearhug and a mantra: “You’re okay, you’re safe, come back to me please.” He was practically begging after five minutes. In between breaths, you managed to get out a strangled “Why do you like me? Why haven’t you given up on me?” You were still crying but Derek knew he needed to act. He pulled away and softly wiped your tears, forcing you to look at him. “I need you to copy my breathing baby, can you do that?” It took some time but you were able to get your breathing under control, the tears not so much. Silence took over the two of you until he spoke up. “Why would I give up on you? Everyone suffers differently. You choose silence and that’s okay, the only thing I can do is be a shoulder for you to cry on if you choose it. I haven’t given up because I want you to be happy.” He paused, gathering his next thoughts. “I like you because you’re unapologetically you. You try to detach yourself and not care but you’re not great at it. I know you sneak Garcia’s favorite snacks into her lair and don’t think I’m oblivious to you being the one to listen to Reid’s ramblings when the rest of us tune him out.” You interrupted him. “You guys should stop doing that by the way it’s mean” For the first time in what felt like forever he laughed. “See that’s what I mean. You hide behind a grumpy exterior but you’re so much more than that, and that’s one of the many reasons I like you.” You just stared at him. You couldn’t remember the last time someone spoke to you like that, let alone the last time someone saw beyond your gruff exterior. You started to apologize for the breakdown but he quickly nipped that, explaining how you don’t need to feel sorry. You felt safe for once. The cold feeling dissipated and was replaced by an unfamiliar warmth. The tears stopped and you were hyperfocused on the way the man in front of you met your eyes. The silence that hung over you felt like normalcy that only lasted a second before Derek spoke up. “If it wasn’t clear baby I like you.” You looked up at him confused. “I know you just told me that.” A dopey smile spread across his face as he answered. “No, I like you and want to take you out on a date.” Oh. OH. You smiled. A real, toothy, dopey smile that matched his. “I’d like that.” The walls began chipping away.

It would take time and resources to completely demolish them but for the first time you were excited for the demolition.

#reidersdaydreams #reidersshootingstars #derek morgan #derek morgan x reader #derek morgan fanfiction #derek morgan fic #criminal minds #bau #cm #angst with a happy ending #fluff #angst #fanfic

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lilacxquartz · 1 day

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Those Late Summer Nights I Chapter 15

Satoru Gojo × Fem!Reader × Suguru Geto

ABOUT: You moved to Tokyo over the summer to take a teaching job. As you get settled in, you find yourself entangled in a toxic dynamic.

CHAPTER SUMMARY: Having to work with Satoru on something on campus, he does something he shouldn’t.

Trigger Warning: sexual assault/non-con

A/N: Next week’s chapter will arrive on Friday instead of Wednesday due to irl factors. The posting schedule will resume as normal after. :)

< Previous Chapter • Next Chapter >

15. Surrender

The training with Suguru was set to resume a couple of days later, just as he had promised for lesson number two. The letters from jujutsu tech also started arriving at Shoko’s doorstep, relieving you that you didn’t have to go back and forth to campus anymore to check if there had been any new mail. Took the system long enough to update, you thought.

You read the letter on your way to meet with Suguru for the next lesson, unsure why you were even entertaining continuing to meet with him at your own will. Maybe it was confusion, or something similar? You didn’t quite understand a single thing that was going on in your head right now and needed some familiarity even if it hurt you.

(Again and again.)

Through the letter, you discovered that you needed to be at the campus to finalise some arrangements with Satoru, who you would be sharing some students with as a finalised decision after all.

Suguru caught up to you quickly as you walked, filling out the empty space beside you with his company, snatching the letter right out of your hands all the while you couldn’t help but roll your eyes. You didn’t have privacy around him anymore, it seemed, but it was strangely comforting in a way you didn’t want to understand, wanting to grab onto whatever positive fragment your life teased you with, urging you to hold onto any sort of comfort with all of your remaining will.

You glanced upwards while he read the letter before giving it back to you, something about his demeanour suddenly seeming troubled.

“You’re working alongside Satoru?” he frowned slightly, albeit subtly. Suguru was good at concealing his emotions if he had to, but his eyes always gave him away.

You nodded, folding the paper back into your pocket, “Yeah, um, seems it…”

“In that case,” he hummed, pulling you just a little closer to his side as he walked, “let’s train just a little harder today.”

Usually, you would have thought nothing of it. You already knew that you had to know how to conduct yourself in front of the students and that much was ingrained in your mind already. However, it was the hint of worry that crept through his words that left you feeling a bit hesitant, the tone throwing you off just a little.

The truth was complex and Suguru already knew how badly you were adjusting to him, so he kept the truth hidden for now. Even if it was a risk to do so. Satoru however, surely wouldn’t be risky enough to do anything on campus.

…Would he?

The possibility haunted the back of Suguru’s mind as he reluctantly let go of you, interlocking his fingers along your hand instead. He didn’t trust his friend for this one isolated matter, which was messing him up as well. Rather than leave you alone entirely like last time though, he was going to collect you from the campus instead.

“What time did it say you’d have to be in for?” he asked, trying to feign simple interest in the job instead.

“Um, sometime around two in the afternoon…?” you replied, “It said it would be until four specifically.”

He nodded, making a mental note of it in his mind. He saw that it had to be for Monday, so that’s when he’d show up and pick you up directly, not risking a single repeat of what happened the last time.

“And why do we have to train harder…?” you warily asked, still feeling somewhat sore from before.

Reeling you in a bit closer, he tried to ease your worries, “He’s just a bit too much sometimes and enjoys showing off, I’d want you to keep up, you know?”

“I suppose…” you shrugged, seeming to buy into his response to his relief, although the way he delivered his assurance only seemed to agitate you further. If he was in this deep with you, then why did he continue to withhold things from you? Especially since he didn’t like it when you did the very same.

How frustrating…!

Suguru continued to walk with you, still choosing to conceal his concerns. Something else stirred as he plotted for you to not even start the job at all, but he couldn’t quite justify it just yet. He needed a reason to pull you away from it all, to make it seem justifiable to the both of you rather than just doing so without a cause in mind.

“So yeah, let’s just focus on making today count,” he mumbled, making his way into his car with you, ensuring you were all buckled up before getting ready to go.

For now he settled on a different, less extreme plan, deciding to move you into his place instead permanently later on.

Shoko would be fine, she wouldn’t suspect a thing, surely.

(She would.)

You didn’t say anything but you did let it go, entering the studio along with him after the ride and getting started with him as he prepared himself to teach you how to actually fight now.

And he was going to ensure that this lesson counted, because if he didn’t, then it would be you who suffered more in the end and that was something that he was trying to avoid repeating ever again.

(Not knowing what his friend had in mind at all.)

~~~

Come Monday, the day to go to the campus had finally arrived. Per Suguru’s request, you let him know when you went and promised to shoot him another text when you were done, although he kept an eye on the time anyway.

The atmosphere on campus also seemed to be much more livelier than before as the stillness from summer finally started to move forward again. Students were beginning to move into the accommodation and other staff seemed to be returning to the grounds.

It was still a little unbearably hot though, especially in the late summer heat. Your body felt sore as a result from Suguru’s relentless training and the humidity surely made it all a little worse. Various insects chirping and buzzing alike could be heard in the background, especially where the water flowed.

Satoru could be found in the classroom portion of the campus. The letter told you where to go on that note and you luckily knew where to head exactly because you forced yourself to memorise the floor plan in its entirety while you still resided on the grounds.

His head craned up when he saw you enter the room, seeming happy to meet, “Hey [name], looks like we’re working together after all, huh?”

You smiled and nodded as you entered, however noticing something strangely off about his demeanour but you couldn’t place your finger on it.

“Yeah, seems it,” you replied either way, brushing your hair behind your ear to keep the heat from overwhelming you.

He hummed as you spoke, handing you a timetable with an allocated student that you would both be overseeing. Your eyes scrolled over the paper, seeing a whole lot of scheduling but not a single name.

Pursing your lips together, you tilted your head off to the side in confusion, “Who’s the lucky student? It doesn’t say.”

“Oh, doesn’t it?” Satoru smiled, seeming a little playful. “You might find the details in the supply closet. Should be inside a folder somewhere with this year labelling it, yellow tabbed shelf if so.”

You stood still for a moment as he instructed indirectly what you should be doing, some alarm bells going off in your head as you drifted past him to approach the supply closet. The windows were cracked ajar and the hot air pushed inside, wafting a familiar smell past your senses—a cologne of some sort? It smelled a little like…?

(Your mind made the connection immediately, but you refused to believe it. It couldn’t have been... It couldn’t.)

Stepping inside the closet, you felt immediately trapped somehow, your suspicions turning into confirmations as you felt the small space becoming stuffier. Swinging right around, you saw Satoru standing right before you; his figure blocking the doorway, his once calm eyes that offered still waters were now a raging blue storm, catching you in the middle of it.

“Satoru…?” you asked, watching warily as the warmth from his face faded entirely.

You remembered how Suguru seemed to act after hanging out with Satoru for the evening just a while ago. His hostility didn’t quite add up to you back then, but you were starting to understand something slowly but surely.

“Hey, [name]?” Satoru asked you, his tone of voice ice cold.

“Yeah?” you replied, half torn away deep in thought.

“So, I’ve been thinking…” he trailed off, or at least that’s how it all sounded to you. Something was connecting in your head, like puzzle pieces falling into place. Your brows involuntarily knitted even if you maintained a smile while he spoke, feeling an air of danger grow thick between the two of you.

You nodded on and off and answered him on autopilot, feinging some semblance of what could have been a normal conversation although you zoned out as he spoke. His words became a droning sound the longer that the smell of his cologne sat in your senses and how the memory of Suguru joking to train extra hard now replayed in your mind.

It could have meant nothing, but the intensity on his face when he parted that suggestion didn’t leave your head. His tone just days before was almost pleading and that threw you off now that you were catching up to all of it.

Satoru continued to explained to you how he was going to do most of the talking as if to brag, because he wants to be the fun teacher of the duo. He did say that everything should have a healthy balance though, so you could be the reliable sensible teacher to keep the students in line.

“Don’t you think so?” he would say as he closed in, walking you into the wall.

“What?” you asked as you tried to relax. “Oh, yeah. You can show off.”

Satoru hummed in amusement, “I’m glad we can agree, but you really should have listened more.”

“I have been listening-“ you defended yourself in protest only to be cut off with the truth.

“—no, at least not after a while,” Satoru corrected you, “once I could tell you were distracted, I started reciting nonsense to see if you’d pick up but you ever did,” he concluded with a slight laugh.

“Oh sorry, I thought I was listening,” you tried to defend. You knew that you seemed off too, but you also didn’t quite feel safe in the dynamic he was playing you into. Unlike with Suguru who seemed to be at least somewhat into you genuinely and out of a form of twisted care (or at least that’s what you kept telling yourself to sleep better at night, that he was just misunderstood in his way of expressing his feelings, even though both you and him knew fully well that your relationship was built on something much darker than that.)

“You’re a bit of a mess lately, aren’t you?” he continued to ask, caging you in with his arms.

“Oh…?” you replied, trying to ground yourself together again, “I suppose it’s just nerves?”

He didn’t reply for a moment as he took in the sight of you. In his mind, you were a perfect disaster right now and likely didn’t notice a single thing with how he was approaching you, how he was subtly coaxing you while you were distracted with different thoughts.

Satoru indeed thought that this was the fault of nerves (rather than it being a revelation on your end) and that made it a perfect time to ease into you, to take you away from your own imploding mind and dare he say it, perhaps even share what Suguru kept hidden perfectly well for a while.

And as your very state of being crumbled in front of him, you found yourself barely being able to hold yourself together, not noticing just what exactly you got yourself into and how.

You went into the supply closet to get a folder, right? So why were you backed up against the shelves while breathing in his scent that smelled so much like the… person who…

(Your mind refused to make the connection. This wouldn’t be happening to you a second time, would it? By someone you thought you could trust. Again? There was simply no way. It was a coincidence. It had to be, but the way he trapped you and the way he didn’t seem to let you go was already telling enough.)

“You know, you’re very easy to get along with,” he spoke up after a while, completely catching you off guard with his observation.

“I am…?” you replied as you were broken away from a troubling realisation, not sure what to make of that statement. Was that a compliment? Or did he simply just mean to imply that you were very agreeable?

“Very much so,” he said flatly, not offering you a further explanation.

You tried to move past him but he wouldn’t budge, pushing you back into the closet to keep you right where you were.

“W-What are you doing?” you asked, not wanting to deal with him being this obnoxious. However, something told you that it was much worse than that.

(It was happening again. It was happening again. It was happening again.)

“You know, I don’t usually have to go this far, but,” he said as he spoke up after a moment of excruciating silence, “there’s something I don’t quite get.”

You blinked at him, doing your best to understand, “What?”

“You’re not into me at all, are you?” he asked.

“Are you really asking me that?” you frowned.

“Yeah, I guess I am,” he shrugged, the playfulness still absent from his voice. “So, what is it? Is there someone else already?”

“Well…” you tried to forge a suitable reply but your words were lodged in your throat again; there absolutely was someone else.

“Is there?” Satoru repeated himself.

“Does it really matter?” you asked.

“I guess not,” he replied, forming a faint smile as something dark stirred within him, “I can’t force you to like me, that’s not on you.”

“So, can you move aside…?” you asked.

“It’s just… I feel like you owe me, at least just a little bit,” he said instead as he leaned further in, pressing his body up against yours, “at least after how I’ve helped you as your good friend, you know?”

“I thought friends do things for each other because that’s just the nice thing to do?” you asked, hoping that he really wasn’t holding what he did for you against you.

“I mean,” he replied as he mulled over your response, “you’re right, but it wasn’t something insignificant, was it? I helped you out a lot and friends are allowed to owe friends favours.”

You stared at him.

“Wouldn’t you agree?” He asked as he stepped back just a little, just enough to allow you to breathe again.

“I-maybe?” You considered despite not liking at all where he was going.

He suddenly laughed a little as he eyed you up and down despite the anger playing in his eyes not matching his grin. He knew that he was scaring you and that he wasn’t acting fair, he didn’t usually act this way either but… he also felt played to an extent and regardless of everything else, he was still human (and humans thrived off of irrationality, especially when facing things they didn’t understand).

“Of course, I’m also just messing with you,” he assured, the back of his hand brushing against your face.

“I-If that’s the case, then I’ll just b-be going-“

“—hold up, I didn’t actually say that you could leave yet, now did I?” he said as he didn’t budge yet again. “Just humour me for a sec, [name].”

You sighed but tried to stall it off, despite knowing where this was headed somehow, “Huh?”

(It was the same sort of conversation. The same sort of entitlement. You could feel it. It was the worst type of deja vu.)

“Just… tell me. Why have you been giving me absolutely nothing?” Satoru asked.

“No attention?” you quizzed back, furrowing your brows in utter confusion.

“Well, anything really,” Satoru replied, his smile fading again despite adopting a playful tone, “who’s the loser that’s got you on a leash?”

You kept quiet as you withheld your answer.

“Do I know them?” he pressed.

You looked at the ground and gently nodded your head, your suppressed body language giving it away that it must be someone close to him.

In the back of Satoru’s mind, he already knew from the moment he saw you in Suguru’s room, but he was hoping that it was actually because you didn’t want to be around anyone else. This meant that his friend had also lied to him.

“Don’t tell me,” he said as he raised his voice a little, his tone ripe with mockery and taunt, “you’re both serious, aren’t you?”

“I-I, uh, yeah-“ you nodded, recognising that it was only because he got to you first, because you didn't want it to be over for some twisted reason, because then that would have meant you got used and that possibility ate away at you constantly, keeping you up at night as Suguru held onto you like his life depended on it.

It was that sliver of uncertainty that settled in your mind, again and again.

“—well that’s just incredible, I got the short end of the stick for once, didn’t I?” he laughed a little as he realised it, acknowledging the idea that if Suguru didn’t want to share, that it was actually serious between you two. For some reason, that hurt more than it being just a casual thing.

He suddenly seemed very calm as he relaxed, “Have you two..?”

You nodded again, not daring to reply. In your defence, you didn’t exactly have a say.

“And all I got was a shitty kiss?” he laughed again, finding the comedy in this whole situation.

“S-sorry?” you replied, unsure how to proceed. Why were you apologising? You didn’t owe him anything, you knew that fully well.

“Hey, hey now, don’t worry, I’m just being dumb aren’t I?” he said, his body language relaxing even further as he settled on something, he already knew that he could get away with it.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” you asked, unsure how to deal with him right now.

“I’m fine, I’m fine,” Satoru smiled, leaning closer, “but,” his voice lowered, “we’re going to be working closely now, aren’t we?”

“I-I could transfer-“ you stammered.

He cut you off, his words sounding sharp. “—I could make it so that nowhere else hires you, actually. You should know by now how influential families work, right?”

You didn’t reply, the words stinging a bit too much. He didn’t know the full story but he knew enough to understand that his words cut you a bit deeper with that remark and although some guilt formed in his mind for using that line, he didn’t apologise when he saw the hurt forming in your eyes.

“So,” Satoru spoke up again, continuing with what he wanted to say initially, “what if I asked you to break up with Suguru. Would you?”

“H-huh?” you asked, even if you wanted to at this point, you were pretty certain that he wouldn’t let you.

“What if I wanted you instead?” he asked you, leaning in closer as he continued, “would you break up with him for me?”

“N-no?” you answered him.

“Ah, a shame, but… I don’t like it that it’s only Suguru who gets to have all the fun,” he considered, “you can handle me as well, can’t you?”

“N-no, I’m not like th-that,” you shook your head in response.

“I know you’re not,” Satoru replied, laughing to himself as he seemed awfully relaxed for this intense situation he had you locked into, “but what if I didn’t care about that? What if… I just took what I what I wanted from you anyway?”

“Y-you wouldn’t-“

Interrupting you again, he moved dangerously close, “—who would believe you?”

Your body reacted slightly, attempting to push him away. Some things from the training sessions stuck, like how to keep people off while they presented an opening, but it was only a couple of lessons at most and you were up against someone who had likely been training from the very moment they could walk.

“Oh? So he’s taught you a few tricks, huh?” he laughed, holding you back with a hint of amusement laced his tone, “I don’t have to tell you that it won’t be enough, right?”

As you struggled to reply, Satoru continued to hold you in place with one hand while the other hand unzipped his trousers.

He pushed you down at the shoulders, forcing your knees to bend as you quickly caught on to what exactly he was about to do.

Before you could say anything in retaliation, he cut you off before you could say a single thing.

“Just remember, [name],” he said as he held you below him, “you’re mine too”

“N-no?” you replied, trying to push him away from you but the door behind him was now both closed and locked from the look of it. When did he have time to lock it? Let alone close it—and why was he looking at you like that?

(You knew why, though. You fucking knew why.)

“I’m gonna have you, [name], at least like this,” Satoru purred, his eyes boring yours, “at least for now. You’re going to be mine in one way or another.”

“W-what if someone sees or hears something…?” you asked as you tried to talk him out of it.

“They’ve all gone out to after work drinks, I made sure they all know and usually I’m a late arrival,” he smiled, “besides, students can’t access this building either over the summer.”

Satoru then pulled you towards him as he fumbled with his trousers while your mind couldn’t comprehend what was happening to you. This approach felt humiliating as he loomed over you, keeping you perfectly locked into a kneeling position and so forcefully compliant. Of course he would prefer if you were at least the slightest bit willing, just as he had fantasised but you weren’t… so he adapted.

“Open up, [name],” he purred as he attempted to coax you in without too much force. He felt himself harden quickly, the blood rush feeling almost dizzying, prompting him to think more with his other head than anything else, “It’ll be over sooner if you just cooperate~”

Continuing to protest however, you pushed away from him a second time all the while he simply repeated himself, proving it to painfully pointless to continue fighting against his demand. Satoru’s fingers held onto your shoulders painfully, as though clamping you into place, his own irrationality threatening to escalate unless you surrendered to his own frenzied craving.

Arrogance dripped from his expression as he looked down at you with straight entitlement leaking from his gaze; he felt owed this, especially after for being on good behaviour for so long. Suguru all the while got to you while being pushy—forward, disrespectful and maybe even worse and yet, you didn’t seem to protest too much when around him.

That much stung for Satoru, to see you not even pretend to not be okay. You were fine. Almost accepting of it.

(Not knowing that you were the silently imploding type, but how could he, when you were both so different? While he openly complained through his troubles while you took them in pained suppression, despite you perfectly demonstrating this at his side in late June. He wanted to believe that he pushed a breakthrough for you, to leave a troubling world behind, to forget about the past and move forward, even platonically, but something about his friend having you and not him stirred at something ugly and he hated the taste.)

The pain continued to build while you finally gave in, unlocking your jaw and reluctantly opening your mouth. He didn’t wait around as he brushed the tip of his hardened length against the edge of your lips, the regret and irrationality melting away as he savoured the sight, the ugly taste of envy boiling off into something that tasted sweeter as lust finally settled into the brew.

You struggled initially as you took him in, your mind trying to block out the taste of him and the experience overall as you willed for it to be over sooner than never, not quite daring to scroll your sights up to meet with his hungry eyes. You shuddered almost, as you felt him lean into you; your tongue enveloping him slowly but surely.

Initially, you tried to pull away again as though by instinct. You didn’t think much about such a movement, but he slapped the side of your cheek ever so gently to keep you compliant and paying attention.

“Bad girl, keep giving me attention,” he whispered, pulling you closer to him; his fingers clasping around the base of your skull.

Not protesting a second time, he held onto you as he slid you back and forth against his shaft, feeling the all too incredible sensation of something forbidden, it somehow tasting even sweeter as he got into it. You struggled to take him properly as your lacking experience came into light, feeling unsure of what to even do but this didn’t seem to deter him.

As though to signify you to not worry, he pushed you gradually deeper as he rolled his his hips in a steady motion back and forth; his tip just about managing to reach your throat but your gag reflex worked against you, so he didn’t push you too far—just enough to get the job done.

“Shame you can’t keep up,” he hissed, seething his frustration into the air, “what has he been doing with you otherwise?”

You ignored the comment although it wasn’t like you could protest anyway, feeling him continue to use your mouth while his rhythm slowly but surely picked up. He couldn’t get enough of you struggling to take him, but at the same time, something bitter left behind a sour taste in his mouth again when he noticed tears spill from your eyes, deciding to let you breathe, if only just for a second.

Slapping the side of your face again with his palm, he played it off as annoyance, not concern, “Keep up with me.”

Pushing through it all again, he rocked his hips against your head while staring straight ahead this time; focusing more on the sensation than anything else. He rutted his hips as his release gradually built up, surrendering to something darker than the initial lust that fuelled him—guttural moans escaping his mouth as he let go of being careful for a moment, forcing himself to forget that it was you, that it was just one good feeling, that you weren’t crying—that you weren’t in the process of growing to dislike him.

(Something he truly feared above everything else was those he liked to think badly of him, an insecurity he kept safely hidden. He was the strongest and enjoyed a good ego boost, but what did that matter when the people he cared about didn’t think the same?)

He faltered as this revelation hit, despite being close to his end but strove forward to see it through, regardless. The guilt was already there from the start, so he just had to push through it once more.

“I’m close,” he warned as he leaned forward, one arm prepped against the shelves for stability while the other pushed at your head, demanding release.

Satoru held onto you as the sensations intensified, his movements beginning to get erratic as his breathing shuddered against his lips. He slammed his hips against your face, eyes fluttering as they rolled back, shooting hot white ropes of cum into your mouth and sealing himself forward to not even dare make a mess.

“Swallow for me,” he demanded, refusing to leave behind a trail of evidence while his thoughts now spiralled. He could feel you struggle to accept his load in that way, knowing it was likely not the safest to empty himself like that without giving you as much as a breather, but it was already done.

You reluctantly did so, feeling it travel down your throat. A sickening sensation.

Studying your face as he finally pulled out from you, tucking away his now spent cock back into his trousers, he didn’t quite understand how to proceed with the consequences.

“Don’t tell anyone about this,” he warned, “it’ll be our little secret, right?”

With a strained demeanour, you nodded, knowing fully well that this couldn’t remain hidden for very long because Suguru could read you strangely well and such a prospect troubled you, given how he reacted the last time when you told him the truth.

As Satoru left in what seemed to be a hurry, he left the doors to everywhere else unlocked for your eventual departure. He wasn’t about to face you again so soon, the guilt of the aftermath already taking its toll. He couldn’t help but wonder if Suguru had a similar reaction after; the feeling of something almost nauseating that almost violently haunted him after.

You too, felt something horrible stir within you as you remained slumped against the shelves with your eyes blurring on and off from the tears that kept gathering and spilling again and again. A burning sensation after a while, as though to remind you that you were indeed in hell.

It wasn’t quite anger, nor shame, nor sadness. It wasn’t guilt, nor disgust, nor even disappointment.

No, it was a combination of everything.

And in a moment of realisation, it all started to make sense at last—in fact, you understood it all so perfectly well now.

You were starting to hate yourself.

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outmakingmoonshine · 19 hours

Text

Why does it kinda lowkey feel like Claire is to Sydney what Francie Fak is to Nat?

I'm sorry but this season told me Sydney could not care less about Claire or her having a place in Carmy's life whatsoever and I can only imagine if she did voice her opinions out loud it would sound a lot like how Nat speaks about Francie Fak.

Gif credit

The face Syd made and her response when Carmy mentioned Claire in 3x01 spoke volumes and It's absolutely reasonable that Syd thinks Carmy's so messed up this season bc he misses Claire but she doesn't ask him about it once.

She asked about Chef Terry twice, was very sympathetic in 3x05 and even tried to comfort him and make put a positive light on it when she saw he was down about Ever's funeral in 3x09. But she didn't say anything about Claire all season. She asked if he was ok a few times in regards to his mental state in S3 but she wouldn't go near the subject of Claire with a 10-foot pole!

This story is obviously going to end with Syd & Carmy finding some kind of deep lasting connection with each other, what would be the point of all the miscommunication and struggle to connect between them that's been a central part of their story for 3 seasons if it's not? And as it stands in the story right now, that wont be happening as long as Claire is around. If they wanted a Carmy&Claire with Syd as the platonic partner ending, Claire and Syd needed to be besties and that needed to happen when she was introduced in S2. But obviously Claire and her presence in Carmy's life is a big issue for Syd and I don't think that's gonna miraculously change anytime soon. Even if it did happen next season it's wont feel genuine or earned like every other real friendship in this show anyway.

Sidenote: While writing this I just read this amazing post by @thoughtfulchaos773 with some great observations and discussion by @currymanganese & @vacationship, please go check it out. Thank you to all of them!

Even Cicero seemed surprised by Syd's sage wisdom in 3x05. Whether she's never been in a relationship or not she could definitely give Carmy some kinda advice on Claire, even just to ask if he's ok after what happened or wants to talk about it. Especially bc the way he's acting this season seems like it's because of her and it's making their relationship and Syd's work-life harder...but she doesn't bring it up. Not one single time. It's interesting that she checked in with him and asked if he was ok about almost everything else that was clearly wrong all season, except Claire. But apparantly they have a "platonic intimate friendship" right? So why wont she talk to him about the thing that's clearly bothering him??!

Syd doesn't care about that relationship or want it to work out. And now I've read that post above, despite her obvious personal feelings for Carmy I think Syd clocked Claire's mean girl vibe in 2x05, the same way Claire clocked the vibe between Carmy & Syd. She knows Claire isn't good for Carmy otherwise even despite her feelings, I think she'd at least ask if he was ok after everything that happened and everyone hounding him about it. But all season she basically acted like Claire never even existed.

Syd should've put a stop to Carmy's nonsense in 3x02 when she was all the way done with him over the non-negotiables, she knew he was going way overboard then but she didn't stop him because that's how he was coping and it meant he'd be in the kitchen spending time with her which is how she's been trying to help him since the beginning. "Being there" like she told Cicero. It was slowly starting to work in 2x02 as well, Carmy was in a much better place mentally. If only Claire hadn't come along.

#all S3 syd said “claire who? I don't know her”#she's so real for that tbh #sydney adamu #carmy berzatto #sydcarmy #sydcarmy meta #the bear season 3 #nat berzatto #francie fak #the bear fx #the bear meta #anti claire bear

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hotheadedhero · 1 day

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please hsc for tmnt 2012 in which the boys discover that his girlfriend is masturbating (they find a vibrator, e.g.)

AN: My first 18+ request, let's go! Hope my awkwardness doesn't make it suck 🥴

All characters are aged up

Caught Single-Handed (18+)

Warnings: Mentions of masturbation, sex toys, saucy behaviour

2012 Turtles x Reader

Leonardo

The moment his head passes through your window, he knows there's a difference in the air from what he usually arrives upon. A certain something faintly distinct in nature. A smell. One that he recognises, one that he has become all too familiar with since being with you. It isn't strong, but he's become highly adept at picking up on these things so it's hard to miss.

His first instinct is to leave well enough alone but he’s almost overwhelmed by the lingering scent of your prior arousal. Even if he hadn’t picked up on it, all of the other signs are glaring at him: the thin veil of sweat on your temples, the feverish tint to your cheeks, and you smile at him as if you haven’t done anything. You must think you’re so sneaky but you forget who you’re dating.

Leo’s first foot barely makes contact with the floor before he asks, "Fun evening?"

Your head angles to the side with a contorted amusement and then it dawns on you what he’s referring to. When you bite your lip, when your eyes fall to the floor, his suspicions are confirmed. He fully climbs in and holds his arms over his chest, awaiting an explanation. As if he needs one, the cheeky bastard. He knows what he’s doing. He just wants to see you fidget under his expectant gaze.

"I wasn't sure if you'd make it tonight,” you finally admit.

He has to laugh at your impatience, now wondering how many times you’ve felt the need to take care of yourself. Unease settles in your veins and you assume he must think less of you. Far from it. Your eagerness for relief sets off something wild within him and he catches you off guard with a kiss.

"I'm here now,” he mumbles into your lips, letting his hands fall comfortably on your hips. “Want to continue where you left off?”

God, yes, you think. You don’t even need to say it. He takes the liberty of reading your mind and fulfils the neediness that had you so unwilling to wait.

Raphael

He didn’t mean to snoop around and deliberately find the vibrator but he hardly had to do any snooping at all. Apparently, you aren’t very careful when it comes to hiding things. It was poking out of a random box underneath your bed, practically staring him in the face. You must have haphazardly thrown it in the first place you could think to. Either that or it didn’t occur to you to put the energy in, assuming it wouldn’t be found to begin with.

So surprised at your ownership of this extravagant-looking toy, he doesn’t know what to think. By no means is he crossed with ill-thought. Raph just never would have expected to come across something like this. Sly vixen. You’re so sweet most of the time. This discovery doesn’t make you any less so but he feels like he’s stumbled across a different side of you. He’s still holding it when you come back into the room and you’ve never wished for the ground to swallow you more quickly. There’s a knowing gleam in his eyes as he leans back against your dresser and twirls the toy in his hand.

"Mind explaining this, princess?" he asks, lips outstretching deviously.

Your mouth opens and closes like a fish begging for water before you’re able to speak. "Sometimes we go a few days without seeing each other and... you know..."

His cool-headedness is such a stark contrast to how you currently feel. You could have sworn you hid your dirty little secret better. This is the price you pay for doing a half-assed job of cleaning up. Pathetically, your eyes shift around, trying to not seem embarrassed and the way you squirm in place is too good to pass. He does the honours of hoisting you over his shoulder in a fireman lift. A palm lays flat on the cheek of your ass before giving it a good smack, making you yelp.

"If you think this thing can make you feel as good as I do, you got another thing coming."

Without another word, he takes you to bed to prove that his word is no empty promise. A challenge has been posed with this toy's existence and he accepts. You don't think you've ever cum so much in your life.

Donatello

His heart was in the right place when he intended to help you tidy your bedroom. He knows better than anyone what it’s like to have a messy space and how detrimental that can be to one's mind. When he encounters the open lipstick on your bedside table, two things go through his mind: your forgetfulness is endearingly precious, and he should close it for you. At least, he would roll it down if that was an accessible function but the entire item is made of plastic and metal.

To the unknowing eye, it looks like an ordinary thing of lipstick just as he had first believed himself. Oh, how wrong he was. As soon as he tried to twist it, he knew what it was. That isn’t to say that he’s overtly familiar with such things but he’s had his fair share of time on the internet. During his escapades on the web, he’s bumped into certain websites whilst looking for a gift for your birthdays or such.

"I didn't know you had one of these,” he imparts, holding the small object towards you.

Upon seeing what’s in his hand, you’re almost mortified The whole point of getting a bullet with the discrete design was to avoid a conversation like this. Marketing isn’t to blame here but you can hardly ignore the aggravating irony of the situation. In future, you’ll learn to not be so careless unless you want to risk someone else encountering these things. Anyone other than your boyfriend would be so much worse.

“I can’t say it’s something I use often.” You shrug it off as best you can given the rising heat in your cheeks.

Not something you use often but something you have definitely used, Donnie thinks. Unfortunately, your face won’t be cooling down any time soon as he advances towards you. His fingers barely pinch your chin but it alone is enough to take your breath away.

Then, he leans in close to your ear, breath ghosting the outer shell and whispers, "You'll have to let me watch some time."

Call him experimental but he’s happy to see how you satisfy yourself. It’s all just information he can gather through observation to best suit your needs in the future.

Michelangelo

Whilst you’re preparing snacks for movie night, he rummages through your things in search of something to entertain himself. Call him restless but doesn’t like waiting too long without keeping himself occupied. Besides, there’s no telling if he might uncover a Christmas present you have tucked away somewhere for him. It wouldn’t be the first time he’s attempted to get a sneak-peak, much to your voiced annoyance.

Instead, he finds a rectangular box in your wardrobe with a… he isn’t actually sure what it is. It’s a small rod with a bulbous protrusion at one end Curiously, he hits one of the buttons and the entire thing vibrates so aggressively that he almost drops it. Whatever it is, it sure does pack a punch. He speculates with himself for a minute, coming to the conclusion that it’s a device for relieving neck pain or sore muscles. He tests that theory by pressing it into the dip between his shoulder and head, precisely the moment you return with the food.

"Sweet massage stick." His voice warbles with the onset of oscillations against his neck.

"That's not- Oh, god.” Laughing into your free hand, you place the snacks down and take the wand from him. "It's a sex toy, Mikey."

His slightly widened gaze only sends you into further hysterics. Were it not for his misidentification of the wand, you would have been humiliated. Yet again, the relationship you have with Mikey is hardly met with shame. The two of you aim to be as open-minded with one another as you possibly can. It’s a very freeing prospect when you frequently give each other the space to candidly express your thoughts and opinions. Mentioning your possession of the wand was a matter that somehow hadn’t crossed your mind, however.

You go to put the toy away but his hand halts your movements and with an innocent smile, he asks, "Show me how to use it?"

The vibrator does a good job of pleasuring you but when it's in his hands, you realise you've been missing out in the bedroom this whole time. So much for movie night.

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ghostbustting · 1 day

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97 James as a new dad, holding his newborn babygirl and crying as he kisses her tummy and tells her how much he loves her BDHDBSHSH I need this

I'M SO SORRY THIS WAS VERY RUSHED AAAAA

╰┈➤“𝑯𝑶𝑳𝑫 𝑶𝑵„ ๋࣭⭑

‘97!James Hetfield x Reader

In James' perspective.

It wasn’t long after half of our show was done, we were only taking a small break and talking to the crowd, hyping them up as they return the hype back towards us. Everything were going so well, we can hear our fans cheer for us non stop.

That’s when that roadie came to me, giving me a news I’ve been waiting for since ages, yet also a news that made my heart drops.

“James? James- hey, what’s the matter?! Where are you going?!” I hear my bandmates call out behind me. But I didn’t care.

The sounds of disappointed and confused fans in the crowd of audience were too loud to avoid, meanwhile I try to brush them off without a single ounce of care. My mind occupied with two things and two things only.

The love of my life.

And the little soul inside her womb that was brought into our life as an evidence of our love.

My mind race with thoughts of worry.. panic.. fear. She’s being sent to the hospital alone all the time I was screaming lyrics and playing chords on my guitar to the crowd of people.

I wished that damn roadie would just interrupt me sooner. I could care less about satisfying my fans when my pregnant wife is in a critical condition.

I make my way out of the venue as soon as I gather my stuff, pushing through the amount of fans and paparazzi waiting for me, I can smell their nosy asses from miles away. Knowing their exact plan to put this news in papers.

My mind seems to be in a world of it’s own, as if working on auto pilot.

I took the nearest cab and make my way to the hospital, urging the driver every now and then to speed the fuck up despite the speed limit on the road.

I was aware it might be rude. But my eyes were blinded by the visual that appeared in my brain of how much pain she must be in right now, how much struggles she’s been putting up with these couple months.

Minutes of the car ride seems to feel like eternity, only building up my impatience. “Faster!” The words can’t help but blurt out of my mouth once again, I can only pray that god bless this driver for putting up with me.

Once the car comes into a stop, I immediately hand him the cash- not caring how many money left my wallet as I immediately head out of the car and walk into the hospital, asking around for my wife.

My heart race, sweat trickling down my forehead as a nurse willingly lead me through the busy hospital halls. “Where is it? Where’s the room?” I can’t help but ask the nurse, impatient. I can tell how much my nonstop questions were pressuring her as we walk faster.

I just want to see her face. See her smile with our baby in her arms. To know we’ll finally be a complete family. To find her safe, at the very least. Hold her in my arms, cover her face in kisses, let her know I love her and I’ll be hers forever.

“Where is it?!” I ask with more urgent now, my eyes narrowed and eyebrows furrowed in frustration of being parted with her for far too long now.

“Sir, please stay calm..” The nurse desperately try to dodge the many patients and doctors walking past us, the hospital seems to be terribly busy tonight.

Then, finally.. we arrive at the room.

The nurse opens the door and let me enter, the doctors and nurses inside all turned to look at the now opened door and my figure stepping in.

I didn’t care about how they turned towards me, I just immediately make my way towards the bed I see my woman laying on…

I stop in my tracks.

My eyes widens at the sight before me.

My heart melts with pure love.

All kinds of emotions fills my sense; Happiness, disbelief, love, care. I took a big inhale and let out a deep breath when I see the baby in her arms. I gasp and my eyes wells up with happy tears.

I scan my lovely wife’s face, her beautiful face painted by her perfect smile that I will never get bored of, her own eyes were filled with tears. “James..”

“Baby, I-” I fail to make a single sentence as I shake my head and make my way towards the bed, kneeling beside it as my eyes are fixated on the little being sleeping in her arms.

I look at her, my eyes searching for hers as I cannot believe this is real.

Her eyes met mine and she nod as she sniffle and a tear roll down her cheek, “It’s a girl, James.. she got your blue eyes..” My eyes widen as she said this softly, her eyes looked tired but still filled with love and happiness.

My hand reach up to hold her head and kiss her hair, “I’m so sorry I didn’t make it..” A tear leave my own eyes as I look down at the small being, too small and fragile and precious for this world. “Oh.. my baby girl..”

Carefully, I hold the baby’s small hand, trying not to wake her up. “My sweet angel..” I choked out a small chuckle through my tears. “She’s so beautiful.. and small.. and cute.. oh my god..” I peck her small hand and smile almost too wide that my cheeks hurt. “I’m a dad.. I’m a dad..!” I exclaim happily.

I can feel my wife’s hand gently stroking my hair and chuckle as I admire our baby girl, small sobs of joy leaving my lips. “You cry so ugly..” She whisper through her own tears.

Her words made me chuckle even more, too happy at the moment to even come up with a clever comeback, “Shut up..” I wipe my tears and sigh to control this overwhelming feeling of happiness and gratefulness that consumes me.

The baby girl’s small but cute cheeks just looks so adorable, I can’t help but bury my face in her small tummy and press soft kisses all over it, nuzzling my nose against my baby. “I love you, I love you, I love you..” I whisper softly.

I feel a hand on my back and I hear her voice again, “Jamie, you’ll wake her up..” She giggled softly and pull me back. I smile up at my wife cheekily and lean my head on her chest. “Sorry.. can’t help it..”

I sigh and keep my eyes on the cute baby, “The boys will not believe this!”

My smile cannot leave my face. Not even for a single millisecond. I feel so lucky. My life never felt so completed with these two girls close to me. Not a single groupie out there will stand a chance to this strong woman next to me.

“Hey, sweetheart?”

“Mhm?”

“I love you.”

I look up to see her beautiful smile once again, my eyes on those lips I wish I could glue onto mine forever. She’s everything I could ever dream of. The main piece of the puzzle to my life. The sunlight and moonlight of my world. The air I breathe everyday.

“James?”

“Yea?”

“Let’s get some chicken curry after this.”

My head turns up to her again and I laugh softly. That’s what I love most about her. She can walk into a lively room and still be able to light the room up even more than anyone can.

I slowly look down at the baby in our arms again.

And this little one.. will surely be just as special and lovely. Our sweet angel.

#James hetfield #james hetfield x you #james hetfield x reader #james hetfield fanfiction #james hetfield fluff #metallica #metallica x reader #metallica fanfiction #metallica fluff #fanfiction #fluff #divider by v6que

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codename-adler · 1 day

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last line tag 🍊

thank you beloved @stick-ball for the tag 🧡

so this is embarrassing. i thought the last thing i wrote about was the Renison wip Baby Girl, Good Luck, but it's actually a random jerejean scene for Steady Now? and by random i mean... hot steamed buns. i didn't actually get to that part, but i feel like oversharing, so have the whole dry thing:

Jeremy doesn’t touch Jean anymore. To wake him up. From the nightmares.

He waits it out, makes sure to be ready for when Jean comes out of it, be whatever he needs, steady presence or safe absence. Jeremy keeps his back to Jean and lets him decide the course of action. If he calls out to Jeremy or simply watches him until the claws of the Nest recede. He’s not actually sure if Jean knows he’s awake the whole time, if he knows just how attuned Jeremy is to his sleep cycle and everything that unfortunately comes with it. He’ll let Jean decide for this too, if he prefers the semblance of secrecy or if he’d rather know for sure. Jeremy does kind of feel bad for having learned to be aware of everything it entails to be Jean, because he doesn’t want to seem like he’s repeating abuse of the past, but it’s also not like he has any ill intention whatsoever. Jean needs this. He can’t ask for it, so Jeremy will give it to him without a word, until he tells him to stop.

When there’s a louder, longer rustle of sheets followed by complete silence, Jeremy knows Jean managed to get himself out of the nightmare. Then the deep, shaky breaths begin, in and out, in and out, like Jean’s been taught. Jeremy lies still, patiently awaiting Jean’s choice for tonight. But he already suspects it’s a ‘fighting alone’ kind of night.

The following half-hour is passed in silence, and Jeremy knows Jean is watching him from his bed on the opposite side of the bedroom. He can picture him so clearly despite the darkness, his closed eyes and his turned back. Because Jean had chosen to sleep on the bottom bunk, and Jeremy had a single bed, he knows Jean couldn’t see him properly if he stayed lying down on the mattress. No, he’s sitting cross-legged, facing Jeremy’s bed, elbows resting on his knees, hands clasped, and eyes like magnets on Jeremy. It doesn’t feel like being a target though. It feels like… a weight full of meaning and responsibility. It’s his back, with Jean’s eyes on it. The heaviness is scary. But not unwelcome. Never.

It somehow lulls Jeremy to sleep, every time. It feels steady. And steadying. Like ocean waves. It frees his mind from stray thoughts, their unkindness, and leaves only the calming warmth of roaming sand.

But tonight, Jean surprises him. Watching is not enough, and despite being on the brink of sleep, nothing could keep Jeremy from lighting up at Jean’s voice, calm and clear, calling to him, “Jérémy.”

no pressure tag: @cielalune @kevinsdsy @joanofexys @stabbyfoxandrew @dvrcos @peaceoutofthepieces @vykio @minyard-05 @ninyard @fallenstarzz @merceyca & all who wish to yap about their projects <3

#last line challenge #last line tag #my asks #my wips #project: steady now #jean moreau #jeremy knox #jerejean #the sunshine court #aftg #all for the game #the foxhole court

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thesilversun · 1 day

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WIP Wednesday once more and something from the Difang to Difanghua fic.

So the Difang part is about to happen.

“Enough,” Di Feisheng says, grabbing it back from him. “You’re spilling half of it.”

“It’s still my turn.” Fang Duobing tries, unsuccessfully to grab it back from him. “I thought we were sharing it.”

There is slight, but very definitely sway as Di Feisheng gets to his feet, holding the wine jar high above his head, and out of Fang Duobing’s reach.

The sudden fear that he will walk out and leave him takes hold. He stands quickly, ready to try and stop him. He blinks, the room blurry and soft in the lamp light. They should probably stop drinking now, but then what other reason would he have to stay?

“What are you going to do?” Di Feisheng waves the wine, teasing him with its presence, but keeping it just out of reach. “Are you going fight me for it?”

He doesn’t want that. He doesn’t want either of them to be hurting more than they already are tonight. It doesn’t mean that he can’t find another way to distract him or get him to drop it.

“What are you waiting for?” Di Feisheng asks, bringing the wine jar briefly into reach of him, so that he can take another drink from it.

Fang Duobing knows he should take it from him now. Knows he could. Yet all he can do is watch how Di Feisheng throat moves as swallows, and how the wine leave a damp, shine to his lips.

It’s not like he hasn’t noticed that Di Feisheng is a very attractive man before. He has. At first it had been an annoying realisation, because he’d found irritating and suspicious, because he hadn’t wanted to share Li Lianhua with him. What a fool he'd been.

It had been harder to ignore when Di Feisheng had come to live with then. When he’d been without his memories and he’d allowed a more playful side of himself to show. Less guarded. Less hurt by life. He wants that for him again. To see him laugh and smile. He wants to help it happen.

He wants to help. It’s all he’s ever wanted to do. Whether it was those early dreams being Li Xiangyi’s disciple, of upholding what he’d wanted the Sigu Sect to represent, or become part of Bichuan Court and help people, or then just to be Li Lianhua friend to help him and eventually to save him. All he wants to do help, but the world and everyone around seem to make almost impossibly hard.

In the soft, alcohol blurred lamplight the droplet of wine still glints on Di Feisheng’s lip and Fang Duobing knows what he needs to do. What he wants to do at least.

It’s stupid and reckless, and maybe it will still end in a fight, but maybe it won’t. Maybe he’ll just drop the wine and call him a fool or a cheat, for trying to get it from him in such an underhanded way, and for spilling it. Or perhaps he’ll kiss him back. There’s no way of knowing, and it’s probably a terrible idea for any number of reasons, but uncertainty or risk of failure have never been reasons to hold him back before, and Fang Duobing isn’t about to start letting them be now.

Stepping in closer, Fang Duobing reaches up, standing on tiptoe as if he’s going to try to make a grab for the wine. Then at the last moment presses a kiss to his lips.

Di Feisheng doesn’t drop the wine.

Nor does he return the kiss.

In a single swift movement, he grabs the front of Fang Duobing’s clothes in one hand forcing him back, until he’s bent backwards over the table, while he places the wine down on the bench beside it.

It’s so swift and sudden that Fang Duobing finds he can do nothing but give an undignified squeak of surprise and go with it.

Pinning him to the table, Di Feisheng presses an arm across his chest, holding Fang Duobing in place. “What was that?”

“A kiss,” Fang Duobing replies, still uncertain where they are going to go with this. “It's what people do it when they-”

Still holding him down, pinning him to the table, Di Feisheng kisses him hard.

#wip wednesday #mysterious lotus casebook #di feisheng #fang duobing #difang

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duskandcobalt · 1 day

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Everywhere, Everything: Chapter Six

Chapter Summary: Elain is cornered into making a decision on the future of their relationship when Graysen asks her a question.

Word Count: 4.4k

Missed the first five chapters? You can find the Masterlist for this fic here 🥰

A/N: Happy W(no longer)IP Wednesday!!

As always, thank you for all your lovely comments and messages about this fic and others... and also just in general. I'm always so blown away by how lovely this community can be and I appreciate all the support and your patience so much. It's been a busy couple months and I am so excited to finally be posting this chapter. It contains the very first paragraph that I ever wrote for this fic all the way back in October last year so it feels very surreal that it's finally going up!

I do want to give a tiny warning for a potential trigger in regards to Graysen's behaviour. It's just a tiny part but it may prove difficult for some readers so please be aware of that before you read. I hope you like this chapter, please let me know what you think and what you think may happen next!

ENJOY XX

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Elain’s ears were filled with the sounds of chatter, the clinking of champagne coupes, and the romantic crescendo of whatever modern song the violinist in the corner of the room had recomposed to better suit the energy of the function tonight. She fidgeted with the neckline of her dress in an attempt to cool herself down. The room was packed with people and despite the otherwise cool night, she could feel the first bead of sweat running down her back.

They were at Graysen’s parents house for yet another Saturday night dinner party. This one was another lavish soirée with no real purpose that his mother had thrown together for the weekend. Much like every one of these events, Elain only found out that she’d need to dress up to the nines when Graysen informed her in the shower that morning, with his arms around her waist and his lips against her ear, that she’d need to look extra pretty tonight.

Elain always felt out of place at these things. She felt underdressed and unprepared. She was constantly worried about how everything she said and did would be perceived by Graysen’s parents and their friends.

She’d become an expert at flying under the radar at these events - had figured out quickly that blending into the wallpaper was more tolerable than attempting to blend in with the crowd. She’d given up on the latter after the first couple of these Saturday night parties where she worked out that no amount of socialising and smiling would get the other attendees to look at her with any semblance of respect once they found out that she sold handmade soaps and herbal tonics for a living.

She couldn’t exactly rely on Graysen to be any sort of support at these things either, not when he was too busy schmoozing with some businessman or lawyer or doctor. He’d corner her every now and then, drape her on his arm in an attempt to show her off but Elain knew how to slip away. She knew to whisper in his ear that she needed the ladies room and she certainly knew how to take her time making her way back to him. What she didn’t know was how her partner couldn’t seem to tell, or perhaps didn’t seem to care, that his family didn’t respect her.

Elain had been wandering around all evening, entertaining herself by picking at the canapés and the drinks that were balanced on trays carried by wait staff dressed in head to toe black. She’d just plucked another thin stemmed glass of red wine from a passing server when she felt the energy in the room completely shift.

She heard the way conversations suddenly stopped, felt the way the air turned stagnant. Most of all, she somehow knew, without even having to check, that every single eye in the room was focused on her.

Elain glanced up from her drink and found the nerve to turn and see what all the fuss was about but that singular second was all it took for her to wish that she’d simply minded her business.

She froze in an instant, completely and utterly paralysed at the sight in front of her. Graysen was balanced on one knee, looking up at her with his bright blue eyes and a small black velvet box cradled in his hand.

She felt like she was going to be sick. Couldn’t stop her hands from trembling, couldn’t do anything to slow the frantic racing of her heart. Part of her hoped that this was a nightmare. She prayed that she’d wake up in the safety of her bedroom and that none of this would be real.

It felt like the whole room had tilted, the wine she’d been knocking back suddenly hit her full force as she continued to stare down at him. Based on the immediate silence that had fallen around them and the look of despair that she’d somehow managed to spot on his mother’s face from where she’d suddenly appeared just behind her son, he hadn’t told anyone that he’d intended to do this tonight.

Elain couldn’t hear anything over the rush of blood between her ears and she barely registered the way his lips shaped the question as he carefully opened the box to display what could only be described as the most ostentatious ring she’d ever seen in her life. It was gigantic and shiny and so out of place compared to all the other jewellery she owned. She tried to listen to what he was saying but Graysen’s words were overtaken by another memory she’d tucked away carefully in the very back of her mind that had chosen this particular moment to resurface.

…

“You should marry a boy like that.” Her father had told her once, peering at her briefly over the top of the glasses perched low on his nose as he’d fiddled with whatever woodcarving held his attention that particular night.

Elain had been sitting in the armchair across the fire from him, quietly cursing under her breath as she tried and failed to crochet a teddy bear for Feyre’s newborn baby.

“A boy like what?” She’d asked, setting down her hook and actually looking up at her father. It was so rare for him to comment on any of his daughter’s relationships - romantic or otherwise.

“Like that Azriel boy that’s always trailing you around,” he'd muttered, once again focused on his project. “Nice kid… respectful. He’d be good for you.”

Elain had been flustered, suddenly warmer than she’d been just a minute before as she attempted to figure out how to respond. She was so taken aback by the conversation that she hadn’t even stopped to point out that her father loved to refer to Azriel as if he barely knew him. As if he hadn’t spent fifteen minutes engaging in quiet conversation with Azriel each and every time he walked in the door for the past seven or eight years. As if her father wasn’t one of the very few people to whom Azriel would offer anything more than a passing ‘hello.’.

“Az and I aren’t… we’re just…” she’d sighed. “He’s just a friend, Dad.”

“Didn’t say he wasn’t,” her father had shrugged. “Just saying I’d be happy if you married a boy like him.”

“Well I’m not looking to get married any time soon and certainly not to - wait, why are we even talking about this?” Elain questioned, cutting off her own sentence as she nervously fiddled with a knot in her skein of yarn. She’d been desperate to move on from the topic lest she be cursed to ponder her feelings for Azriel any more than she already had when she was left alone with her thoughts too long.

“Feyre is married with a new baby, Nesta’s moved out and is getting married soon so you don’t see her as much. It’s a Friday night and you’re at home with your father, El.” His voice had taken on a serious tone. “You don’t think I haven’t noticed that you’re lonely? The only time I see you really smile anymore is when you’re with him.”

“That’s not true. I’m not lonely and I like spending time with you or by myself,” she’d said, unable to meet her dad’s eyes. How could she when she knew fully well that she was lying through her teeth?

“I’m just a little worried about you lately,” Mr. Archeron had continued. “I want you to be happy, I know Azriel makes you happy and I think, for whatever reason, that scares you. ”

Elain had blushed, biting her cheek. She had no idea how her usually clueless father had zeroed in on the two truths that she kept closest to her heart. She couldn’t work out how he’d managed to sense the feeling of relentless loneliness that followed her like a shadow as everyone around her found their people and their place in the world. She certainly hadn’t been able to figure out how he’d known that her feelings for Azriel often toed the line of just friends and how that feeling had amplified once she’d found herself spending more and more time alone with him.

“Azriel doesn’t… I don’t think he sees me like that.”

There had been a million reasons running through her head. A million excuses for why she and Azriel wouldn’t work. Why they couldn’t be together. Why it would be an absolute disaster if they even tried. She’d never dared to voice them out loud, never even dared to admit that she felt like that towards him.

Mr. Archeron had laughed - two quick short breaths that sounded a lot like disbelief. Elain had always loved her father’s laugh, but in that moment it had made her angry for a reason she hadn’t been able to nail down.

Elain had stared at him, mouth agape. “What?”

“Elain, Azriel likes Nesta. He likes Feyre. But that boy loves you.”

It was Elain’s turn to laugh as her father’s words landed. She’d clutched at her pendant and set aside her long forgotten project.

“That’s ridiculous. That’s not true,” she’d said, standing up on embarrassingly shaky legs. “I’m going to bed. Goodnight, dad.”

It hadn’t even been close to the time she usually went to bed but Elain couldn’t sit and listen to that anymore. The idea of Azriel returning her feelings was preposterous. The idea that her father thought he was in love with her? Absolutely nauseating.

“Give it a chance, El.” Her father had said softly as she made her way towards the stairs. “If he likes you and you like him, give him a chance. He’s good for you.”

…

Her father’s words had haunted her all of that night until she forced them all the way into the back corner of her mind where she kept all the other similar feelings and thoughts she preferred to ignore. Suppressing the memory of that night had worked well and it had popped up only one time in the years since. When she’d been laying in bed with Azriel on one of the nights in the week after her father had passed - her tear streaked face in the crook of his neck, his hand rubbing soothing circles on the small of her back.

His words came flying back into her mind now as she looked down at the man on one knee in front of her.

“I…” She forced herself to speak after almost a full minute of silence, her fathers words still blaring in her ears.

He’s good for you.

The only time I see you smile anymore is when you’re with him.

That boy loves you.

How could she say yes to anyone else when there was only one person she’d ever truly wanted?

She needed to say something. Anything. She focused her eyes on Graysen, her face softening in the hopes of lessening the blow she was about to deal him. “Please don’t do this.”

His face fell at her whispered words, his lips pressing together into a straight line as he slowly stood up and squared his shoulders. She didn’t miss the flash of anger that passed over his face as he pocketed the ring, there and gone in a second before his usual cool demeanour settled into place.

Graysen gave her a smile that didn’t come close to reaching his eyes as he placed a hand on the small of her back and Elain did her best not to flinch away from his touch. He led her out of the room, muttering an excuse to the rest of the guests - some small joke at her expense that he trusted would make light of the situation. She tried to ignore the incessant buzz of hushed whispers as they passed by his friends and family. His mother’s relieved face was the last thing she saw before she stepped outside and took her first proper breath in what felt like minutes, relishing in the soothing feeling of the chill night air on her overheated skin.

He didn’t say anything to her. Not as they walked towards his car, not as he drove her back home. She couldn’t bring herself to say anything either, too shocked from what he’d just done to form a coherent thought. It wasn’t until they were back in her apartment that he finally broke the unbearable silence between them.

“What the hell was that?” He didn’t bother to mask his anger anymore. It resurfaced clear as day, written in every harsh line of his face. He stood a foot away from her, one hand braced on the bannister of her stairs to block her from getting around him.

“We’ve never even talked about this.” She shook her head, shakily running a hand through her hair. “We’ve never once discussed getting married.”

She knew that he hardly listened. She was fully aware that in the year they’d been together, he’d rarely taken the time to ask her questions. Had never bothered to truly get to know her. She’d ignored it at the beginning, had kept him around because he’d been the distraction that she needed at the time and she’d been happy to go along with it as weeks turned to months. She was happy to play the part of the partner he so clearly desired.

He’d been nice enough that she’d thought that one day it would click. That maybe with enough time, she could trick herself into thinking that she was capable of loving someone other than the kind-eyed boy whom she’d silently pined over for the last decade. The only person she’d ever felt comfortable enough around to not have to pretend to be anyone other than herself. It wasn’t until she’d turned to see Graysen on one knee that she knew that she couldn’t do it, couldn’t pretend to love a man that didn’t even really know her.

“I wasn’t aware that this was something we had to discuss, Elain.” Graysen replied. “You’ve just fucking embarrassed me in front of my family and friends.”

Elain scoffed, just half of a clipped laugh filled to the brim with disbelief. “That’s what bothers you about this situation? That’s what you’re annoyed about? You aren’t bothered that I said no but you’re bothered that I said no in front of all those people?”

“Of course I’m bothered that you said no but you could’ve waited to say no instead of making a scene.”

“I didn’t make a scene, Graysen!” She seethed. “You made a scene by asking me that question in a public setting when we’d never discussed this before! You’ve never asked what kind of ring I wanted, we’ve never talked about what kind of a proposal I might like, we’ve never even discussed if either of us wanted to get married at all.”

“I thought we were on the same page. I’d assumed you’d say yes!” He dragged a hand through his hair.

“You assume a lot about me and that’s the entire problem,” she shook her head solemnly. “I know I’m not an open book, I know I keep a lot to myself but you’ve never even tried. You’ve never asked me about myself or my interests or you tune out when I do talk about the shop or my family or things that I like. All you care about is dressing me up however you like and parading me around. You like that I don’t argue back, that I go along with whatever you suggest and that’s okay because I’ve played a part in that as well but you don’t know me, Graysen.”

“If you felt like that then why are you here? Why have you stayed?” Graysen asked.

“I don’t know,” she whispered. “It’s been nice and I do care about you but it hasn’t even been a full year, Gray. I just didn’t think we were close to even considering getting married.”

“So it’s not because you’re waiting for him?”

Elain stopped short, startled by his remark. Graysen had never once brought up anything that had happened back home since they’d gotten back from their trip for Nyx’s birthday at the start of the year, much to her surprise. And Elain had fought tooth and nail, used every little bit of willpower she had to stop her mind from constantly fixating on what Azriel had told her on Nesta’s porch that night. On what he’d gently advised her to do.

I can handle you being with someone else, I’ve done it for a decade… but please… please don’t stay with someone that doesn’t make you happy just to prove a point to yourself or to me or to anyone else.

She’d heard him that night and then proceeded to do exactly what he’d told her not to. She’d spent months - years in all actuality - running from her problems and it had finally caught up to her. She’d hit a brick wall, hard and fast, and now she was completely stuck, caught in a web made of all her worst decisions.

“Elain?” Graysen’s voice broke through her spiralling thoughts. “It’s because of him, isn’t it?

“No,” Elain shook her head. She couldn’t work out why even now she was fighting the truth.

“You’re in love with him aren’t you?”

“No,” she shook her head, hating the way tears immediately started to fall from her eyes, as if her body was rejecting the lie. “He’s just my best friend.”

“Take off the necklace, then.” Graysen jutted his chin towards her chest, his eyebrow raised and his lips set in a hard line. “If he isn’t the reason that you can’t say yes to me, if you don’t love him… take off the necklace.”

Elain stepped away from him, swallowing her nerves. She felt dizzy all of a sudden. Everything felt wrong, the air felt thick and heavy and a horrible ball of something ominous settled in the pit of her stomach. “I can’t take it off, Gray. I won’t.”

She really couldn’t. She’d only ever taken it off for an x-ray or a massage. She knew it was ridiculous, that it was just a physical object and it wouldn’t be the end of the world if she gave in and removed it, but unclasping her necklace would feel like the end of something and she just couldn’t bring herself to do it.

“Take it off, Elain.” Graysen demanded again, stepping towards her. “You won’t accept a ring from me but you’ll wear some piece of shit necklace that your best friend made for you years ago?”

“It’s a necklace with sentimental value, Graysen. I’ve worn it every single day for years and I’m not going to change that now.” Elain sighed. “What does the necklace have to do with this, anyway?”

“Everything. It has everything to do with this,” he moved closer. “Hate seeing that thing around your fucking neck every goddamn day.”

“I’m not going to take it off.”

“So we’re done then?” His voice went whisper soft and she froze, completely backed up against a wall with nowhere to go. She knew that when he went quiet, trouble was soon to follow.

“I didn’t say that,” Elain pinched the bridge of her nose.

“You don’t want to get married, though.”

“No, I don’t.”

“Not now or not ever?”

She stayed silent even though the answer was loud and clear in her head.

“Fucking hell, Elain.” Graysen cursed under his breath and moved in even closer. Before she knew what was happening, he’d raised his hand and reached forward, firmly grasping her beloved pendant in his fingers. With one swift movement, Graysen tugged and the chain around Elain’s neck pinched her skin as it snapped.

She was shocked. Elain stared at him with wide eyes and it wasn’t fear that coursed through her veins, but anger. She acted on instinct, shoving him backwards with two firm hands against his chest.

“Don’t you ever fucking touch me like that again,” she seethed, annoyed at the way her voice and hands shook a little. She may not have felt afraid in the moment, but it was clear that her body was having a different physical response. “Get out.”

“Elain-” Graysen tried to talk to her. Reason with her.

She was used to this - the softening of his eyes, his voice. The slight drop of his shoulders. He’d let his emotions get the best of him and now he was doing recon.

“Please, baby.” He tried again, taking one small half-step towards her.

“Get. Out.” Elain stood her ground. “Get the fuck out my apartment.”

It was clear that Graysen was surprised by this. He hadn’t expected her to argue back, not when she usually just gave in to his half hearted attempts at apologies. But she’d had enough and she’d finally stood her ground even if she’d let it go entirely too far. His defences went up in return, his shoulders squared, his jaw turned rigid, and his eyes narrowed.

“We’re done,” her voice cracked as she crossed her arms over her chest.

“So that’s it then?” Graysen raised an eyebrow. “What’s your plan, Elain? You have nothing. You have no one here. All you had was me... My friends. My money. ”

“Please, can you just go?” Elain practically begged, her heart was racing and all she wanted was a cold glass of water and to lay down.

“Do you really think he’s going to want you, Elain?” Graysen gave her a sardonic grin. “You’re nothing but a pretty face. You’ll go running back home and straight into his arms but what do you think is going to happen? He won’t want you.”

Tears pricked at Elain’s eyes and she pleaded with herself to not let them fall. She couldn’t let him win. Couldn’t let him know that everything he was saying were thoughts that she’d had about herself time and time again.

“He may keep you around for a bit but the novelty will wear off,” he shrugged. “I know how men work, Elain. You’ve strung him along for years… he doesn’t like you. He just likes the chase. He’ll fuck you a few times and then he’ll realise that you have little else to offer. You’re nothing, Elain. He may think the world of you now but you are nothing. No one will want a girl like you.”

Elain was shaking. She didn’t know whether it was from anger or nerves or perhaps embarrassment that she hadn’t been able to hold back her tears and now she could taste the salt that dampened her cheeks.

“No one wants a girl like me?” Elain managed to scoff. “Do you hear yourself? You proposed to me not even an hour ago.”

Graysen opened his mouth to speak but Elain had finally had enough. She couldn’t stand to listen to him spit more vitriolic words into her face. Couldn’t stand the reminders of everything she’d already convinced herself to be true. She walked past him, straight to the door of her apartment.

She twisted the knob, pulling the door open before turning back to face him. “Leave.”

“If I step out of that door, I’m not coming back,” Graysen threatened. “We’ll be done.”

“Leave,” she repeated.

Graysen’s jaw clenched and he let out a sharp exhale of air as he made his way towards the open door. He didn’t say anything as he looked at her, only pausing to give her a disgusted once-over before he flung her necklace on the ground. She watched as it landed right by the sharp heel of her shoe.

Elain barely heard him mutter whatever last insult he flung her way before he walked away. She closed her door and locked it but her eyes never left that shimmering piece of gold shining bright on her dark floor. She sank to her knees, tears falling so hard and fast from her eyes that the neckline of her dress was wet. She didn’t realise how quick and shallow her breaths had become until she was on the floor, her broken necklace safe in her hands.

She pulled her legs to her chest and lowered her head in between her knees, her fingers still tightly clutching the pendant. This was the lowest moment of her life and she couldn’t believe she’d let it get to this point. She was disappointed with herself. With her decisions. She’d wasted years of her life. She’d wasted her time and the time of at least two other people. She’d isolated herself from everyone that genuinely cared about her. She’d missed out on major family milestones. Had pushed away any chance of happiness that had been presented to her.

Elain had run and run and run and where had it gotten her?

She was thirty years old and lived in a city that would never feel like home. She had countless failed relationships and one disastrous marriage proposal under her belt. She was having a panic attack in her tiny apartment and there was nothing she could do about it. She grasped for her phone - desperate to have someone talk her through this terrible feeling, to remind her how to breathe.

Amidst her racing thoughts and racing heart, she ran through her options - she couldn’t bother Nesta because she didn’t want to interrupt her time with Cassian. Feyre had enough on her plate with Nyx. She wasn’t close enough with any of her old friends to put them on the spot like this. She wanted her father, wanted a hug and the gruff it’ll be fine that would never come.

There was only one other option left but there was no way in hell she was going to go through with that when Graysen’s words were still blaring through her mind.

Elain squeezed her eyes shut and tipped her head back against the door. She gripped her necklace in her fist and raised her fist to her chest, gently tapping in a rhythm that mimicked a normal heartbeat. She didn’t know how long she sat there before her heart slowed, matching the slow knocking of her fist against her chest.

Her panic had subsided but the sadness and frustration lingered and the profound loneliness that she’d been trying to ignore - the loneliness that her father had once alluded to - finally bubbled up and threatened to drown her once and for all.

#elriel fic #everywhere everything #my writing #elain x azriel #elain archeron #modern au #azriel #acotar fanfiction #elriel fanfic

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