#seeing lux again reminded me i made this lmao

[hetagrammy]

Belgium talking about her brothers

[xxskycrystalxx]

My Thoughts on Lucifer Season 6 [SPOILERS AHEAD]

In order to organize my thoughts better, I decided to break it up into parts (things I loved, disliked, etc.)

Things I Loved:

Deckerstar || We have been on a journey with Lucifer and Chloe since the very beginning. I am so thankful and overjoyed to see how they both developed as characters and as people who love each other. They’ve had so many hurdles/hardships/obstacles in their relationship that it took them until the fifth season to finally get together, after five whole years. To say that I’m proud to see what Deckerstar has become is an understatement, they give me life. There were sooooo many Deckerstar moments in this season that I absolutely loved, from exchanging “I love you’s,” to “partners til’ the end.” (+ flying together and radiating bde as they should) They are literally the epitome of “freaking soulmates,” the amount of love and sacrifices they had for each other just makes me tear up just thinking about them. Also them being actual parents this season was honestly a dream come true. I loved seeing them work and grow together as parents. (Rory calling Luci dad and his face just.. UGH MY HEART)  And their kiss(es) at Lux before Lucifer left, that has got to be my favorite above all. They both have come a long way and they deserved every bit of happiness they got. 

Maze & Eve’s wedding was absolutely beautiful. 

Dan finally getting the closure he needed and going to heaven + giving comfort to Trixie.

Amenadiel || I don’t know if I’ve said this much, but Amenadiel really is one of my most favorite characters on the show besides Lucifer and Chloe. I knew he would've become God sooner or later in the season and I’m glad he did, because we know that that’s his calling, and he’s doing amazingly. I also really liked him being in the LAPD. He got to really understand and see from a different perspective while being an officer there and learning from Officer Harris (which btw I love their camaraderie). I also really loved that Amenadiel and Maze’s friendship was shown more this season. 

The cartoon theme they had in “Yabba Dabba Do Me” was one of my favorite things on the show, and it reminded me just how much I had loved cartoons when I was a kid. And also seeing Lucifer and Chloe being cartoonized was the literal best.

I think we established the fact that Chloe is the best mom ever and she’s powerful af with or without Amenadiel’s rod. 

Lucifer has come a very longgggg way from where we last saw him in season one. The development was hard earned and he deserved it. “Because if the devil can be redeemed, then anyone can.”

“My socks are missing.”

Carol & Ella are C U T E

Linda writing a book about Lucifer and her first draft is essentially about 60% canon and the rest of it is like some really hilarious fanfiction LMAO || Ok jokes aside about the book though, it did help Rory see the other side of the story that she’s missed her whole life, she now knows how much Lucifer loves Chloe, how much he sacrificed her, and how he wouldn’t abandon her unless he had no choice. The flashbacks made me cry so much, it just makes me remember how much Lucifer and Chloe went through together. Linda Martin is the best therapist and the best friend the Devil could ask for. 

Even though the ‘goodbye’s’ Lucifer had to do before he thought he would disappear was sad and made me cry a lot, I really loved how he could finally tell his family, the people he loved, what he felt about them truly. “You’re my favorite brother, brother.” UGH MY HEART; ok but Lucifer and Chloe being in that panic room together and just trying to be with each other just... chef’s kiss. 

Everyone essentially got a happy ending. 

Things I Disliked/Wasn’t a Fan Of:

Time Travel || Look, don’t get me wrong. I love time travel. It’s great, it’s fun and it’s interesting. Was it the right choice to include it in the last season, when there was enough going on as it is with the supernatural? Idk, you tell me.

Lack of Trixie. Can a girl dream? The way I really thought we’d get some important or nice moments with Trixie (besides her and Dan) and Chloe + Lucifer......Mazeve’s wedding didn’t really count since they only really had like a few lines together. It would’ve been nice to see Trixie and Lucifer bond more, even comfort her when she’s feeling sad about her dad again. We didn’t even get her in the beach scene where Lucifer, Chloe, and Rory went as a FAMILY. Like I know she had her scene with Dan and helping him ascend to heaven, but was it really that hard to get her in a scene/moment with all four of them doing something as a family? And we didn’t even get a goodbye between her and Lucifer like what happened? 

What Amenadiel had, Lucifer should’ve gotten as well. Amenadiel as God, he still visited Earth many times, he was there for his son’s birthday’s and Christmas’s. Lucifer? Nope. He was down in hell the whole time. I know he made a promise to Rory to not change anything but I thought it was a torture for him not to be with Chloe like he had always wanted and had a family and spending time with his friends. More like a torture for me in frank. Seeing Chloe give birth without him, raise Rory without him, and even die without him literally broke my heart into a million pieces. He doesn’t even get the chance to see his daughter. Which is why I can understand why so many fans are disappointed with how Lucifer ended, how Deckerstar ended. But I did make my peace with it, sort of... since Lucifer and Chloe can spend an eternity together. 

I liked Rory, but she technically was the reason her parents were separated for so long, idk I’m a bit bitter about that. 

To wrap this up....

Thank you Lucifer, for being a show that will be forever treasured in the fans’ hearts. Thank you for making such an impact on me. I’ve been with this show for many years, I went on an amazing journey with the characters that I love, thank you for giving us Lucifer and Chloe, Linda, Maze, Amenadiel, Ella, Dan, Trixie, and more. The show just means so much to me and I’m honored to have watched the show grow and be renewed, every step of the way. I’m proud to be a Lucifan. And I want to really thank the amazing amazing cast for bringing the show to life. Thank you to Tom Ellis and Lauren German for having the absolute best chemistry ever, for the absolute spectacular and awards deserving acting, and the best real life friendship ever. I will miss you two muffin bffs so much. I love this show, it’s cast, it’s characters, to the bottom of my heart. Goodbye, Lucifer, and thank you for everything. 

[lassieposting]

Does Lucifer have ptsd? I remember that a cast member said that S5 Lucifer would have it but I haven’t seen it yet, unless they mean after God shows up. Which I think is possible considering Lucifer’s reactions towards his mother.

Okay so, I am not a psychologist and can only really speak to my own experience with certain aspects of PTSD, so I’m gonna use the symptom criteria given by the mental health charity Mind, which goes thusly: 

Reliving aspects of what happened

This can include : 

vivid flashbacks - we’ve seen Lucifer have one of these, when he Goddess reveals that Chloe is a miracle. 

intrusive thoughts or images - his constant fear that his dad is controlling/targeting/manipulating him probably qualifies

intense distress at real or symbolic reminders of the trauma - Lucifer gets very upset and stressed about how humanity sees him and that his father essentially vilified him for eternity as well as throwing him into hell

Alertness and feeling on edge

This can include: 

hypervigilance - there’s a screenshot of Linda’s file for Lucifer that mentions he feels “paralyzed” struggles to relax because he feels like he’s being watched constantly by God. 

lack of sleep or disturbed sleep - the same screenshot mentions sleep issues and that he can, presumably, lay awake worrying “for hours before falling asleep” (apparently he’s also iron-deficient, which...probably ties in with the fact that hell doesn’t get a lot of sunlight)

being easily upset or angry - just look at how upset he gets whenever someone says “the devil made me do it”

avoiding feelings or memories

which includes: 

avoiding anything that reminds you of the trauma - see: repeated, messy amateur-hour wing amputation because he can’t stand to be reminded of what he was/what he lost or to be linked to his father again

feeling emotionally numb or cut off from your feelings - the man hasn’t emotionally matured in billions of years

self-destructive or reckless tendencies - i mean. lucifer’s self-destructive spirals are legendary. like the time he tried to goad that rookie into shooting him, or the time he stood in front of a sniper and begged him to shoot and nobody ever mentioned it again

inability to express affection - he can’t tell chloe he loves her. if he says it out loud, it makes it real, and she becomes something his father can take away from him and know it will hurt him. as long as he doesn’t say it, he’s got some plausible deniability, he can pretend he doesn’t care. also, while he’s getting a lot better about it, early seasons lucifer clearly doesn’t understand nonsexual physical affection (i.e. being hugged) and his attempts to express affection to chloe are often mistimed, inappropriate or bizarre. this is a man who’s grown up in a completely loveless environment. he didn’t know how to love or be loved. humanity had to teach him. 

alcohol and drug use - lmao. “Only if you call ingesting millions of dollars worth of cocaine a problem. I call it a Tuesday.”

difficult beliefs or feelings

which includes: 

feeling like you can’t trust anyone - his reaction to chloe’s betrayal in 1x13, when she tries to arrest him. it’s been a while since I watched the ep, but he says something like “The one person I trusted - you - I thought you were different. I was wrong.”

feeling like nowhere is safe - again, that screenshot. he thinks he’s being watched All The Time. his own family has repeatedly tried to kill him. he’s never been allowed to feel safe on earth before because he was always trying to outrun amenadiel showing up to drag him back to hell. him choosing to stay and make los angeles his home - and then fighting for it when lux was at risk of being demolished - was a huge step for him.

feeling like nobody understands - he’s outright said this to chloe and linda a few times. “why bother [talking to chloe about his problems]? you won’t believe me anyway, you think everything i say is a metaphor.” and the “how can you possibly presume to know god’s intentions? stick within the limits of your own intellectual capacity” conversation

there’s also complex ptsd (c-ptsd), wherein sufferers experience ptsd symptoms as well as additional issues such as: 

feeling permanently damaged or worthless - clearly. early seasons lucifer can’t conceive of a relationship that doesn’t revolve around a human wanting something from him; sex, or a favour, or a desire fulfilled. it doesn’t even occur to him that he’s loveable in his own right, the only value he assigns himself as a person comes from what he can do for or give to others. lucifer is very vain, but he also uses that vanity to hide his non-existent self-esteem. 

feeling like nobody can understand what happened to you - i mean, he’s kind of justified here in that what happened to him was eons of torture and divine retribution, and nobody can understand because a) we don’t live that long and b) the majority of his human friends think he’s harmlessly insane, but he’s said as much to chloe and linda

avoiding friendships and relationships, or finding them difficult - until chloe, lucifer’s relationships with humanity had all been surface-level sexual liaisons with no attachment or commitment. “the best night of my life”, say all those people in their interviews with chloe, but none of them considered it to mean anything, even though it clearly meant something to lucifer. he pushes people away or flees when they get too close, because he’s terrified of emotional intimacy. he’s terrified that they’ll eventually realise that he’s evil and worthless and all the things humanity says he is, and that he doesn’t deserve their love. poor thing has been in therapy for years to try and navigate Baby’s First Friendship. lucifer is naturally sociable, but he’s so traumatized and messed up from the billions of years of solitary confinement that he’s terrified of connecting with people even as he’s desperate for it

suicidal feelings - we’ve had at least two onscreen suicide attempts, even though neither was ever really addressed by his loved ones. both times he tried to goad someone into shooting him, knowing that chloe was nearby and that he was vulnerable; he knew he would be killed if either gunman took the shot. he even tells amenadiel he was trying to achieve a “nice, messy” death. 

in conclusion: yeah he’s traumatized as fuck, god barging into his life after several billion years of abuse and abandonment is probably gonna fuck him up hard, and someone should address his suicidal tendencies. like...@chloe wrap your devil in a blanket and cuddle him, maybe? he’s Sad? look after him? 

[thisismyroaring20s]

My track-by-track review of Pray for the Wicked (spoilers)

and by review I mean literally just my stream of consciousness while listening to the songs ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ If that interests you feel free to read on. (Update: the ratings are based on other Panic songs, not just songs in general)

1. (Fuck A) Silver Lining

I think this was the first song I listened to off of the new album, loved it then, still love it now "Out of the old, and into the new, we dedicate, this song to you" GREAT INTRO TO AN ALBUM, felt very We're So Starving-esque, except instead of 'don't worry we're still the same' it's 'we're different but it's fine' (you know what maybe it's more 'swear to shake it up if you swear to listen') and then you get slammed with FUCK A. SILVER LINING. heck yes fuck it up Bren. I like how he's like 'silver isn't good enough, we aiming higher dammit' Shoutout to 'Yonce. The bleep part at like 2:07 reminds me of the radio edit of Raise Your Glass by P!nk. This song is just a little too repetitive for me tbh 5/10

2. Say Amen (Saturday Night)

Does anyone know wtf the intro is saying? What language is that? Is it a language or is it gibberish? Someone help. I hear "ah-deh-jah". Chorus makes me wanna smash stuff, but that may be because of the mv. Again, what are these words? "mah-key-key-yeah" I need answers. Vocals are amazing, obvi. I like this song a lot, and it's my boyfriend's fav as of rn. Saturday, SATurday, SATURDAYEEEEE. YES. incredible tbh. 9/10

3. Hey Look Ma, I Made It

Wasn't sold on the intro at first, sounded boring compared to the others. "i'm a hooker selling songs and my pimps a record label" I love it, great line, was the first thing that I liked about this song. I really like the sound of the pre-chorus. "IF YOU LOSE BOO HOO, HEY LOOK MA I MADE IT" 😂😂😂 I screeched honestly. Chorus is super fun. "if it’s a dream, don't wake me" reminded me of Stay Frosty (shoutout to FOB, love ya 😘) "see it, I want it, I take it" reminded me of two things: 1. Emperor's New Clothes, lbr, "see what's mine and take it" and 2. Fireball by Pitbull "I came, I saw, I conquered or should I say I saw, I conquered, I came" IDK WHY DON'T ASK i hate myself for thinking of that too lmao. I really like the way the song ends, idk why, just sounds cool. As for the music video, honestly wtf. It just reminded me of glee and Ed Sheeran. lmao. I loved it though. Anyways, great song, fun as all get out 8.5/10

4. High Hopes

Yes that brass! 🎺 "didn't have a dime but I always had a vision" "I was gonna be that one in a million" A++ lines. I also live-tweeted/tumbld this song when it was released.

And I did this:

and Panic retweeted me nbd. Honestly I love this song sm, and I relate to it a lot because people are always like "you're never gonna make it (and I'm like "I don't wanna make it. I just. wanna. *guitar riff*" jk lmao) but my mom is like my biggest fan and believes in me a lot and I love her a lot. And I always feel like I do have high hopes for everything, and it doesn't always work out but like... you gotta try for what you want in life. And you gotta be you unapologetically. Okay, sappy time over. The stripped back part that starts at like 2:20 with just his vocals and the background vocals. I've ascended, that part is amazing and then the drums kick in and you feel it building 😍 YES. 9.5/10

5. Roaring 20s

Holy shit I love this song so much. Perfect anthem for the summer I turn 21. The sound of the band at first and then the piano joins in?! Hell yes. "the oddest of summers" would you say it's.. pretty odd?👀👀 lmao I'll see myself out. The line "maybe I'll medicate, maybe inebriate" really stuck with me for some reason, like I like it, but it also kinda concerns me. "Maybe I'll smile a bit, maybe the opposite" I just really like the way this sounds. "My telltale heart's a hammer in my chest" ya girl's an english major and we just studied this last semester, love it. ROLL ME LIKE A BLUNT CAUSE I WANNA GO HOME lmao. Super peppy, makes me wanna dance kinda chorus. "Oscars and Emmys and Grammys, everyone here is a trophy" honestly? Tea ☕. "Hallucinations only mean that your brain is on fire" I just like this line and wanted to point it out ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ The slowed down chorus is incredible, This. Is. My. ROARING. Roaring 20s. Can you tell this is one of my absolute favs on the album? Incredible. 10/10 👏👏👏

6. Dancing's Not a Crime

Started strong. Could tell from the first second this was gonna be catchy af. Shoutout to MJ, amirite? Lots of rhyming. Marauders. Harry Potter. "Dancing's not a crime unless you do it without me" adorable omg Bren ily. "Don't be throwin shade now"

Lmao, no but really, got a little repetitive tbh but adorable anyway. Honestly don't have much to say about this song, it was okay 4/10

7. One of the Drunks

Love the beginning. "orange juice" reminded me of 400 Lux by Lorde and I started laughing. I love the way he pronounces words in this song (esp "times" and "remedy") 😍 "Damn it's all good... I guess" relatable af. "high as the sun, uncomfortably numb" I just like this. The speaking at the end omgggg 😂😂"I SAW YOU FUCKIN LIFT THAT SAX UP TOWARD THE MICROPHONE! AND I FELL IN LOVE" i cried 😂 8/10

8. The Overpass

Um??...yes 😍 that big band opening? hell yea. "sorry to get sentimental tonight" but sentimental boy is his nomme de plume tho. "Someone still loves you" 👀 The song is super fkn catchy, i love it. "sketchy girls and lipstick boys" upgrade from testosterone boys and harlequin girls or nah? I think nah. The mere mention of perfume by panic will always make me think of nearly witches, sorry not sorry ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ THIS SLOW PART IS AMAZING I’M IN LOVE. "down to your blood type" a lil creepy but okay Bren cute. 9/10

9. King of the Clouds

Starts kinda abruptly tbh, but I like it. interesting lyrically imo, and I really like the emphasis he puts on parts of words. music is stellar. lyric video looks really cool w/the song. (Side note: Does anyone know what the symbols in the video that aren't hieroglyphics are? I wanna know, hmu if you know.) Not too crazy about the fast-forward-y high pitched part at about a minute in, it was a choice. "some only live to die, I'm alive to fly high-er than angels in outfields, inside of my mind" I love this line a lot tbh "I'm lost but I better find it alone" made me real sad bruh please you don't gotta be alone 😭 7/10

10. Old Fashioned

Very, very beginning, like first 5 seconds, gave me like Right Where You Want Me/Beautiful Soul era Jesse McCartney vibes. And then the intro went into cellphone/car commercial territory. Then the vocals started and it felt less commercial-y. Love the beat, it's real fun. Verse vocals felt like they didn't quite fit with the music. "seventeen's so gone" "remember your youth...they were the best of times" i'm cryign 😭. "always tip your bartenders" "get boozy" just made me laugh and the rest of the song made me sad. I live for parts of songs when like a chorus of people sing a line together, like gives you hell and the last chorus of this (esp the "pour out some liquor, make it an old-fashioned") #fuckmeup. The very end felt like it should have gone into a peppier iteration of the chorus, felt like it shouldn't have ended there. 7/10

11. Dying in LA

So pretty at the start. VOCALS OMG. "Stars are on the ground" walk of fame? "Every face along the boulevard is a dreamer just like you" I WALK THIS LONELY ROAD. "when ya DYin in la" 😂 Is this just a continuation of LA Devotee? Is this what happens to LA Devotees? Wow the instruments in this song are so pretty. I wouldn't say it fades into WTDMTN like someone said, but it definitely sounds similar, it's just the choice of instruments. That was such a beautiful song. ❤️❤️❤️ Wow. 9/10 

[mischievouc]

♥

Meme: Kiss meme.   ( still accepting if more people wanna! Just not with this length, lmao. )

It was nothing more than a soft KISS on his lips, almost too faint and gentle to even notice, and yet his skin immediately started to be on fire – igniting a  r a g i n g   BLAZE deep inside. He had held himself back for so long, way too long - ignoring his emotions for the past days whenever their gazes had met – and now he was certain that he completely had lost this struggle forever. After seeing her reaction for the very first time, watching the bright DETERMINATION sparkling inside her teary eyes, he had tried to forget once more; reminding himself that none of them was free – that they were not allowed to feel any emotions, any love, to be those they had to be for the sake of everyone. Their MEMORIES had been taken away like leafs fallen from their branches; their former bonds were all lost as if an entire book was completely erased; only bearing blank paper sheets without any written words – it was a NUISANCE to be attached to too many things; to be attached to different worlds or even too much to the other Star Guardians. They never knew when they would meet the inevitable; when they might lose a battle for the very first time. And when they might  f a l l. ( Janna’s silence… He knew that they all had to bury the grief and sorrow deep inside. That all these smiles were just necessary to move forward. But he had never wanted these shackles. He had always sought his freedom. )

Struggling with his own SELFISHNESS over the past days had been exhausting; and he had spent hours of speaking with Yuuto to gain new information about their actual situation as Star Guardians – yet without any success. His trusted spirit did not know much about the First Star’s true nature – very unsurprisingly, since he was also just a messenger and not the First Star itself. ( They still had no true idea what this thing even was. Of course they had no other choice but to keep on fighting like they were used to. And they could not afford it to question too much – even if he was exactly doing that. He questioned all of it. This BURDEN of responsibility put upon them – the sudden loss of their memories… He started to question it as soon as he realized that he could not be together with the one he  l o v e d. ) Ezreal completely understood why Lux had interrupted their kiss – why she had been sobbing inside his arms for longer than an hour without saying a word. ( And because he understood he had held himself back. If only to make it easier for her – for  b o t h  of them. )

( Had she changed her MIND now…? That she had decided to be with him even if they shouldn’t let these EMOTIONS control them? After all the tears he already had to endure to see on her face because they had no future to hold onto but to know that their effort might once save anyone else’s? ) Still feeling the faint TOUCH of her warm lips on his very own, even almost tasting her sweet scent inside his mouth once again – a taste had had learned to enjoy just very little days ago before she had covered his mouth with her hands, interrupting his sudden break out of emotions. ( He had never hold himself back for too much. This was just not his thing – n e v e r  would be. He simply had to kiss her back then – finally holding her inside his arms just to find himself to be rejected. Not because she did not feel the same for him but because she was so very scared. Scared of what she was. Of what he was. And what they could be together. )

Her sweet SCENT  lingered inside his nose as his hand carefully snatched her wrist before she could escape once again – more an impulsive action than anything else. His grip was not too strong to hurt her in any way, but she would not be able to free herself. Not as long as he didn’t want to let her go. Azure blue eyes met her pink ones; even if his decision was already made as she had kissed him. ( The DECISION of no longer holding back. Of not caring. Of just doing what he wanted to do – just like he always had been. To take her hand and just run away with her when their duties allowed it to be at least free then. This was what he longed for the most. If she cried again, he would just wait for her tears to stop while holding her again. Just like the last time. The warmest of all EMBRACES. )

                 ‘No holding back anymore. I’ll never let you go now.                   I’ll not allow you to fall – I’ll not allow to any of us to fade away.                   So just  t r u s t  me.’

Ezreal leaned forward towards the smaller SILHOUETTE, leaning his forehead against hers – shining gems of azure blue watching her as if he was awaiting her answer. ( But all he wanted to hear was that she was trusting him with this. All he wanted was to kiss her again once she said it. )

[positivelyamazonian]

Asky Lulu back again! How much space is given to Lara's and Kurtis' approach to alcohol in your headcon? Core planned to make Lara an alcoholic after the events in Egypt. It's one of the few things I don't agree with them about. Yes, she's deeply depressed/hurt and a bottle of sth may seem to be the only solution; and she's too proud to seek professional help. BUT Lara is smart enough to know it's only temporary. I see your Kurtis more prone to alcoholism than Lara, to be honest...Thank you💗

Hi Lulu! :) Well, it’s always a pleasure to answer your well-thought, researched asks. Though you’ve already read chapter 2 from The Legacy and a glimpse of my idea concerning this is hinted here, it will be a honor to develop this a little more for you! :)

First time I read about Core’s idea of making Lara an alcoholic after the events of Egypt, I rejected it immediately. I didn’t like it. Lara had been always to me like the prototype of strong woman, and - in general, this is not an universal statement - people who drinks excessively tries to drown their sorrows in alcohol to avoid facing their reality. They are weak, and Lara’s not weak. 

Then, after a while, I realized it wasn’t totally a bad idea. I like to see human beings in all their perfection and flaws, the complexity of the human psyche. I just love that. They were trying to make her more human - tho I think she was already human in some ways - so that’s why I don’t think people who have called her an “ice queen” have the slighest idea of what they’re talking about.

In the end, Core discarded the idea and I’m glad they did, for it was too extreme. For her, I mean, not for other kind of character. But she’s always been strong, she’s always being in-control of herself, and ok, I might accept she can take a drink or two when feeling a bit down, but not to the point of becoming an alcoholic. That marks a person per-life - even if you overcame the addiction, it will always be a delicate matter to you. You’ll try to avoid it forever. Seeing a glass or a bottle with alcohol will be always a painful memory, a constant temptation.

Not very Croftish. I’m glad they throw aside that idea, and that’s why I threw it aside too. My Lara’s not an alcoholic, she’s never been that. She might have drunk a little after Egypt, but not to the point of developing an addiction. If she didn’t drink after crashing into the Himalaya’s and being the only survivor, while would she do that now? Just, nah. Her way of escaping things is adventuring, and after Egypt, she might have drink more than usual, and hide herself from the world in her home, but nothing more. The Lara we met in TRAOD is not a drunk. She’s perfectly fine, she even trades with alcohol bottles through the Parisian guetto without taking a sip - correct me if I’m mistaken, but you can’t become an alcoholic and then in only two years grab a bottle and not feeling the slighest temptation of taking a sip. At least, it doesn’t sound logical to me, much less in Lara’s case.

And I can’t agree you more concerning the fact she’s too proud for seeking professional help. She wouldn’t. This is 100% Croft. Bravo. Thats why I laughed my ass when seeing Laraboot going to that psychiatrist btw

Other idea was hinted is that, in a rage or amidst a drunk crisis, she sets fire to Croft Manor. I hated this idea even more than the first one, and I’m glad they discarded it, and so I did. My Lara has never set fire to Croft Manor. It’s her home. She’s not uncomfortable there - “Welcome back to my humble abode” -, tho she prefers, obviously, to be somewhere else, adventuring. 

It’s also Winston’s home, and the home of each one of her friends that might need to stop by for a while - and in my universe, it’s also Anna’s home, and even Kurtis’ home tho he doesn’t feel like he belongs there. Lara would never do that, specially for Winston, who’s taking care of the place while she’s travelling. Setting her aunt’s inheritance and Winston’s daily hard work on fire… no, just no. She won’t reach that limit. I rather see her injuring herself before injuring others, specially those who worried about her when her parents disowned her.

So in the end, Lara might have drunk a bit more than usual in her past, but she’s not an alcoholic and she’s not enthusiastic about alcohol. And here comes the headcanon: she will pretty much despise alcoholics - when not directly pity them. For her, alcohol is a resource for cowards, for people who doesn’t know how to face their problems. It’s a cruel approach, but I think seriously it will be hers. It’s Lara Croft. She can be really cruel and merciless, and in this case, she is.

Not that she thinks she is better for not being dependant of alcohol, of course. Not that she totally rejects it. It’s just, it’s not a healthy habit and she prefers to avoid unhealthy habits, tho she’ll drink in certain occasions if the circumstances requires it. But not against her own will or desire, of course.

Shelooked down at the champagne glass, still half full. In Dubai shariawas strict: no alcohol, but these laws weren’t made for foreigners andcertainly not for the hotels where they were entertained. Still, she had nodesire to drink. In fact, all she wanted was to get out of there.

- MR. VANCE RENNER, Tomb Raider One-shot 3

Now, what about Kurtis? He’s absolutely different to Lara. He’s been through serious shit during all his life - that doesn’t mean Lara hasn’t, but she has a different way to face things. Not Kurtis. He’ll drink. A lot.

Murti never mentioned something like this but he describes him as a “tough customer”. After knowing a little about his biography - the son of a Lux Veritatis and a Navajo woman, harshly trained in the ways of the Order - you can only imagine how much suffering that training could have meant to him, and how sick he got of the Shadow War, so that he decides to betray his people and run away… to seek refuge in the Foreign Legion. The freaking Foreing Legion, which is reputed to be one of the harshest armies in the world, with a really brutal training, composed by ex-convicts and criminals who seek to have their reports expunged, turning their former crimes into military services. A living hell. And he went in there being only 19 years old. Wow.

Of course he only stays there until he achieves French citizenship, then he quits. But even in there he’s chased by demons, to the point his own partners nickname him Demon Hunter after he fights a defeats a djinn in the Arabian desert. This is all Murti’s canon, not mine. It is there when my own headcanon starts.

Taking into account his background story - a warrior, a soldier, a Legionnaire, a hardened fighter - I wanted to develop Kurtis as a tragic character, a tortured soul. Being alcoholic suited him perfectly after that. My idea is that he drank - and drank a lot - during his years in the Legion, together with his partners, and he even won drinking competitions. It’s there when Kurtis develops a tolerance for alcohol. He might haven been punished by his superiors for drinking too much and not be in top form for the military service - and hell, in the Foreing Legion punishments are harsh, even to the point of physical injure, but, what’s that compared with his Lux Veritatis training?

He can take it, and he takes it. After winning several drinking contest, instead of dying of alcohol intoxication or turning his liver into a can of foie gras, he develops an extreme tolerance for alcohol. Just like Marion Ravenwood in Raiders of the Lost Ark, by the way.

This is one of my earliest headcanons, if you remember :) He even uses his alcohol tolerance as a resource to get information, according to his will of always keeping a low profile, his past as a double agent and his choice of not using violence is he can achieve something in a more discreet way.

In fact, Kurtis still had his first glass half full while his partnerwas on his twelfth. He’d only wet his lips twice. “I can’t overdo.” He replied with a calm smile.“I recently had stomach surgery and shouldn’t be playing with this.”

At least, that wasn’t a lie. In fact, he had really good alcohol tolerance - when the fellow right there wouldbe on the floor Kurtis would feel onlya slight tingling; but it wasn’t time to get drunk, not even to sound moreconvincing.

- THE GOLDEN SEAL, chapter 17, This man will survive

So, we can say Kurtis does not become a drunk in the strict sense of the word - he could have not survived too long to that, no matter the Gift - but he obviously will drink without problem most of the time, and of course, he’ll totally drink when feeling down and depressed.

And I mean, really down and really depressed, for he will need a lot of alcohol to really lost conciousness. And he won’t achieve  it most of the times - unless he intends to make his own liver explode. And as we said previosuly, he has not a suicide impulse. He just wants to fade away. For a while. To drown his sorrows with alcohol. 

That’s why he has a different approach of alcohol that Lara has - he’s no problem with it, and he doesn’t exactly  despise drunk people - he pities them at most, and they will remind him of himself most of the time. 

Of course, I’ve always meaning high-grade beverages, and he will only resource to them in extreme situations. If you recall Café Metro, what was he drinking in there?

Exactly. He’s drinking red wine, as far as I know, provided he’d ordered it and it’s not just a tempation dropped there by Pierre, lmao.

I am not an expert in alcoholic beverages - you know I don’t usually drink and when I do, I easily get drunk at the first shot lmao - but I think it takes a bit of taste to prefer red wine over whisky - for example. He’s just there enjoying a glass of French red wine - isn’t that cute, please - because it’s duty day. He’s not renouncing to a bit of alcohol, but definitely he’s not drinking bourbon or something like that.

Ok, this answer is again long af, isn’t it? Time to shut up. Just, long story short: no, Lara’s not and has never been an alcoholic, she might have drink a little more than usual in the past, but definitely that didn’t leave a mark in her. She’ll pretty much despise alcohol as a way of solving things. She’ll have her own ways to deal with problems.

Kurtis, on the opposite, while not being a drunk in the strict sense of the word, has drunk a lot in the past, to he point of developing alcohol tolerance. Most of the time, he’s in control, except when having a disturbing experience or feeling particularly weak, down and depressed. 

But, what is a disturbing experience for a war hero, a lonely wolf who has dealt all his life with disturbing, disgusting and unpleasant situations? Obviously, every person, no matter how tough, has their limits and their buttons to be pushed. And he’ll react badly if having his feelings hurt or his soft spots touched. That’s why he used to conceal those feelings from everyone.

Of course, there’s a single exception for that rule, and this person can really push his buttons. And this is all I can say, for now.

Enough of this. Ana out