#seeing as tybw is now airing

[osakisz]

someone please make a shinji x m reader fic i am so desperate ☹️ i don't even care, smut, fluff whatever just write something for this man 😭😭

[kyokutsu-sama]

Hello! May I request a Shunsui x female reader that takes place before tybw where the reader and shunsui are betrothed but for what ever reason reader dosent want to and therefore dosent particularly like shunsui until finally they start being attracted to one another and they have a spicy night together?

A/n: Hi @mizugami!! Firstly, I'm sorry for the delay. I was prioritizing the other requests because they were quicker to make than a scenario like this one and that's why I ended up taking a long time. I hope you like it ❤️

Tw: Nsfw content below

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Everything seemed to have happened so suddenly that you still wondered if you really wanted that. You liked him, but for some reason you feel like you still didn't know much about him to move forward with it. He, on the other hand, was more extroverted and had an easier time showing his emotions and didn't hide that he loved you, and you don't doubt in any way that he loved you. You thought about a second chance and spending some time with him to try to get closer to him too and also to see if your relationship with him improved.

One night, you were returning after he took you to dinner and now you were walking back home. He and you talked about different subjects or each other's events, he liked talking to you and you also couldn't hide the fact that despite him sounding stupid most of the time because of his silly personality, he still maintained a good posture around you and managed to be serious. In the last few days you felt very close to him and that made you a little more confident and what also revived the feeling you wanted to feel for him. You seemed to still be pondering these thoughts but his hand holding yours was what diverted you from them and brought you back.

"Are you okay Y/n? You seem a little distracted"He said, stopping a little on the way and looking at you "Yes, I'm fine" You said a little nervously after his eyes were on yours and his hand felt so warm holding yours "Are you sure dear?" He insisted "Yes, don't worry" You smiled

He smiled back and you both keep walking until you got home, where you entered in bedroom and sighed tiredly as you removed his flowery kimono from around your shoulders that he had once given you because of the cold night air. His chivalry was a quality, the one that stood out most to you.

"Do you want some?" He asked you after entering the room with a bottle of sake "Yes" You agreed

He poured both glasses and handed one to you, he always used to offer you some even though he knew that you often refused because you were afraid of getting drunk, he knew that and that's why he only used to serve you once and only serve the next drink if you allowed him.

"It was a good night" You said, sitting on the small ottoman in the corner of the room while he sat on the edge of the bed, facing you "I think I should leave my position as captain to someone elseso that I can have free time to spend the whole day with you" He smiled at the idea "Even if you did, you wouldn't enjoy that time because both your lieutenant and the head captain would kill you for it" You added before taking some more of the drink and he laughed "Yes, you may be right, but it would still be a good idea" "I also like spending time with you, this week it was difficult being togetherand I think that's keeping us apart…" you let out a sigh, bringing the glass to your lips again "Do you feel insecure about something?" He looked at you, making you stutter a little at the sudden change in his expression "No…I mean" You fumbled a little with your words but he got up and knelt in front of you holding your hands "You can talk, I will listen to everything you have to say and help you"He seemed understanding and that only warmed your heart even more "Things will only be resolved if we talk" "Yes, I know, it's just…I think this was a little sudden, it's not that I don't like you, I love your way and the things you showed me and..." "Do you need time to reorganize your feelings? I'll give it"

You looked at him in silence for a moment, reflecting. You weren't lying when you said that you liked his presence and everything about him, despite how suddenly it was, he didn't stop revealing his character and showing all his qualities and imperfections. Being his subordinate in the eighth division also taught you many things and you had also known him for years but you were no longer just friends, you two had a relationship.

"I can give you time, as much as you want" He said

His chivalry was what you admired most, maybe you should really give him an opportunity and forget about time and doubts after all you promised to be for each other in everything. You looked up and looked at him, his eyes always sparkled when he looked at you and you had to admit that it turned you on a little. You initially didn't feel like you could be attracted to him but after these recent events things ended up changing a little, especially for the way he looked at you.

"You know, I think…I think I don't need time, I need you" You said and he frowned a little giving a slight smile "Of me ?" "Yes, maybe I should trust more in us and in what we have done throughout this time" You said decidedly "I see, and are you really decided? It's because I don't want to do anything that you don't want or don't feel good about" He said, revealing once again his chivalry and respect for you "Yes, I'm decided. I want it and I want it now" You placed the glass on the side table and leaned over it as he was on his knees in front of you "If you say so, dear, I won't refuse but show you that it's worth it" He said in a hoarse and whispery voice next to you

His breath against your lips, his eyes possessing yours and making you shiver, deep down you knew that no one would look at you in that unique way like he did. Unique in everything, especially his gaze. He brushed his lips with yours and kissed you slowly while you tried to make sure you didn't fall off the ottoman with all that softness. When you separated, he extended a hand to you and you held his, standing up and looking at him. The moonlight outside coming in through the window and lighting up his face.

"I promise to take care of you" He whispered, moving a strand of hair behind your ear "Thank you" You whispered back feeling your heart lighter

He returned his attention to your lips again and kissed you once more but this time there was flame and desire, his hands running down your back, taking off the dress you were wearing to go out. He could look at you dressed like that for hours without getting tired and still give you a ton of compliments.

You felt your exposed skin shiver as the dress fell right at your feet, you removed his clothes, sliding them over his shoulders without leaving his lips. His proximity, his lips, his hands removing the rest of his clothes, everything about him was leaving you asking for more. He picked you up and took you to the bed, laying on top of you, your hands held his shoulders while he lowered his lips to your neck and kissed you. Everything seemed hotter now than before, his body so close to yours and your breathing heavy because of him, he could take any woman's breath away despite them taking him for an idiot.

He went down to your breasts where he sucked your skin and your fingers started running through his wavy brown hair. His hands touched were caressing them, he kept his lips in the middle leaving a few kisses while one of his hands slid down holding the hem of your panties and that was when your legs shook slightly. He got up and knelt between your legs, looking from your chest rising and falling to your flushed face and your shining eyes. You removed the last missing piece and threw it aside with the others clothes, opening your legs and revealing your wet slit to him and seeing the desire in his eyes increase.

"You look so beautiful now Y/n-chan" He said, starting to leave kisses on the inside of your thighs, scratching your skin lightly with his stubble

You moaned when he reached your bud, sucking and pulling it lightly between his teeth, you squirmed feeling such a good sensation running through you and leaving you crazy and lost in his lips tasting your flesh. Your fingers grabbed his hair, relieving the heat in your folds caused by the excitement and his tongue passing through the middle and increasing the viscosity oozing out of you. The butterflies in your stomach only increased with the proximity of the orgasm you were feeling, your thighs tightened around him as he continued sucking on your clit and giving you wet kisses around it.

"I'm close…I-I'm so close" You whimpered feeling your empty insides tightening and your legs closing around his head in the middle of them

His tongue took care of licking every droplet that came out of you until there was no more left, he licked his lips looking at you and getting up. Your eyes followed his and you could feel your body burn in that tension as you watched him removing his pants.

"Come here, love" He said, sitting on the mattress and patting his thigh ordering you to sit on his lap

You lifted up just enough to see him in front of you with one hand on his thigh and the other touching himrself while he looked at you, that excited you and made you even more eager to take him. You placed one knee on either side of him and held his shoulders while maintaining eye contact with him, he couldn't deny that your gaze were seducing him.

"You have such beautiful eyes, my dear Y/n" He whispered to your lips before kissing you "And your such a gentleman, Captain Kyoraku" You said between the kiss "Thank you for---" His sentence was interrupted when he released a small moan as you sit down on his dick. "recognize it" He gave a smile and you kissed his neck while running your hands along his back marking it with your nails "You're welcome, my love" You whispered close to his ear and gave him a light bite on his earlobe

He grabbed your hips as you slowly rode him making him sigh heavily against the curve of your neck, you brought a hand to his face to hold it and kiss his lips. You tighted him inside you more and more as you rode him faster, one of his hands around your waist keeping you close to him and the other on the back of your neck, deepening his lips against yours. You were becoming panting and all your moans were muffled, your panting breathing colliding with his and your fingers digging into his shoulders. You broke away from his lips to let out a whimper when he brought his hand to the middle of your legs, brushing his fingertips against your bud, sending goosebumps down your spine.

"Come to me, my beautiful petal" He said in a hoarse and breathy voice next to his ear. "I know you're close"

You held his forearm while his fingers increased the circular movements while you rode him and at the same time feeling your insides tightening around him, which led him to release some moans and long sighs. You arched your back and tilted your head, releasing yourself on top of him and feeling him fill you shortly after, now with both hands on your waist and his lips kissing your breasts. You had never felt so good as at that moment, everything seemed blurry and spinning, you were tired and shaking. Besides being a charming man, he was sinful and that led you there, but you didn't regret it one bit. He attracted you more than you thought and said.

"Are you okay, love?" He raised his gaze from the valley of your breasts to your half-closed eyes "Yeah…just a little tired"You said while combing the hair that stuck to the sweat on his forehead to the side

You saw softness and affection in his eyes at that moment, you could no longer say that you weren't attracted to him after what he gave you. That had been too good between the two of you. You leaned over him and kissed his lips again and rested your head on his chest.

"Let me take care of the rest for you" He withdrew from you and just hugged your body close to his again and placed a few kisses on the top of your head, running his fingers over your skin "I love you" You said in a low voice before closing your eyes and starting to sleep, with your head against his chest

He looked at you, smiling, watching you fall asleep and kissed your forehead.

"Me too, my dear Y/n-chan"He whispered

[scammydoesstuff]

Finally getting around to sharing my latest sewing project!

My boyfriend - John - and I started rewatching Bleach some and are in the middle of TYBW and, in doing so, I was reminded of just how much I love Urahara Kisuke as a character. It also made me remember how much I wanted that haori he wears, only to then realize I know how to sew now and have adult money with which to buy materials at the fabric store where I work and can find said materials I like best. So I did that! It was a lot of trial and error to learn how to make it cuz I hadn't made anything like it before, but it was so worth it! It's genuinely so warm, but not, like, super heavy. I really like just wearing it around the house and I've worn it out as well.

To be clear; I wasn't necessarily trying to make a cosplay. I jsut happened to have the cane (dressed as Kisuke for Halloween once over a decade ago and just still had it), I happened to have the hat, and I unironically use the fan at my Joann Fabrics job cuz air conditioning is for losers, apparently. Having that stuff was more of a bonus for when I shared some pictures. I also have a black cat, but she's being a brat and won't sit still for a picture.

Anyway, John has talked about possibly cosplaying Shinji and me as Urahara in the future, but I dunno. Guess we'll see. We do have a couples cosplay we're planning for Bleach, but I'mma hold onto that for a while. ;)

[recurring-polynya]

If you could pick just six Bleach characters for the story to focus on, who would they be?

Not sure how anyone could ask me this and think the answer was not going to be the Six Hearts crew, but the answer is, in fact, the Six Hearts crew.

For the most part, I really like Bleach the way it is. I am not a beefer with canon. At least for the first half to two-thirds of it, I find that Bleach has just about an optimal mix of main character focus to interesting side character ratio. I like that it sprawls. I like that a lot of side characters have really rich and interesting back stories that the main narrative gives you little bites of, but leaves the rest to the imagination and/or filler materials. I like stories that give you a lot of space to write fanfiction.

Now, the back half of the Winter War and nearly all of the TYBW did, in my opinion, sprawl too much. The Fake Karakura Town arc used up all my patience with the pillar fights and I spent the rest of it going "get back to Hueco Mundo, already." I definitely would have liked the TYBW to focus more on the core group of characters.

On the whole, though, I like that core the way it is. To be honest, it wouldn't be Bleach in any other way.

Ichigo is the heart of Bleach. His struggles are the themes of the narrative. He is not an everyman character. He is someone who cares so much about the world that he wants to save everyone, but at the same time, he understands and fears the weight of that obligation. His ability to empathize with his enemies-- his inability not to-- is what sets him apart from every other shounen protagonist.

Sometimes I see fanfic where someone else gets stabbed and given shinigami powers other than Ichigo and it's always worse. The only character I accept being swapped in for him is Orihime, and, frankly, that only works in a fanfiction, meta-narrative context, primarily because you need a much better depth of character to be a really good love interest, and I don't think Ichigo has what it takes. Orihime does, though! All of the forces in Bleach pull Ichigo toward the path of battle, but Orihime's stalwart pacifism and unwavering belief in him are the strings that tie him to the world, that keep him human.

I suppose you could swap out one of Ichigo's other school friends for some other member of the Six Hearts crew and probably have it still be okay, but I wouldn't, because their existing dynamic is perfect to me. Uryuu is Ichigo's Classic Shounen foil, but he legitimately challenges him constantly and forces him to think critically about what he's doing. Chad is so full of love and heart and birds land on him like a Disney princess. He is there to balance everyone else's manic energy, except that he's only marginally more thoughtful than the rest of them, so he does not interfere with the general air of stupidity. A lot of people wish Tatsuki had gotten powers. While I don't love the way she is sort of left hanging, I am not sure that she would improve the dynamic. Perhaps it's because she isn't given powers, but she always seems to represent fear to me, the sort of bad-side of attachments that prevents the sorts of leaps of faith the other characters are so inclined towards. The Six Hearts crew being made up of objectively smart people who make absolutely idiotic decisions based on their hearts is the crux of Bleach, and I think Tatsuki brings sort of a rational energy that really dampens the mood.

Rukia is Rukia. Rukia is The Character of All Time. Rukia is the catalyst that sets all else in motion. The other reason that I don't really like Bleach main character swaps is because the decision to illegally give all her powers to some kid she just met, using a maneuver that she probably read in the appendix of a textbook somewhere and involves stabbing him is not a thing most people would do. It is a thing Rukia would do. The way Rukia trains Ichigo and the things she expects from him and the things she expects from herself and from Soul Society are fundamental to the narrative. Rukia stays.

There are many people that would argue for swapping Renji out of the core cast, but I think, for the sake of Rukia's character, it is absolutely essential that there's another shinigami character along for the ride. Rukia is friends with the Karakura kids, but she is not one of them. She is not a teen. She is an undead adult who has deep ties to Soul Society and the Gotei. The culmination of her character arc all ties to Soul Society: becoming vice-captain and then captain, making bankai, earning her brother's acceptance, reconciling with her childhood friend/love interest. Several of the anime filler arcs have her living in Ichigo's closet again and hanging out with the kids, and I think her character suffers for that.

Anyway, thinking over other shinigami characters, there's no one I would pick over Renji. He fits right into the rest of the crew, both powers and personality-wise. He's cool and strong and good-looking, but he's also a simp for Rukia, and Rukia deserves that. Also, he's a high-ranking Gotei officer, which is often convenient for plot purposes. Most importantly, he is my chief blorbo and I love him, the end.

[pikespendragon67]

AND NOW, Time for Another Pikes Check-In Update Thingamajig!!!

Basically this is just where I post current interests/events in life to see if other people are currently sharing the same interest, or if people just wanna catch up on things.

WITHOUT FURTHER ADO:

What I'm Watching

Seasonal anime: Summer season's just starting so of the ones that caught my interest at the moment are the following

Might see if Helck is good when it airs

I'm getting tempted to reactivate my Netflix account for My Happy Marriage but ehhh maybe when Beastars airs again. I do like stories where characters go through absolute shit but get better lives and heal from their experiences

Undead Murder Farce: I really like the character designs, and I love the snark of the protagonists. Hopefully it's like Appare Ranman but with Victorian England instead of 1910s-1930s America

Jujustu Kaisen season 2: Sucks that the airing schedule seems to be whack (first 5 episodes will be normal, but then it's gonna be on hiatus until like. October) but I love the OP, ED, character interactions, and the Digimon joke.

Bleach TYBW: Bleach was my choice of shounen as a youth and it's got me in an iron grip of nostalgia. Is the writing terrible at times? Yes! Do I still love it? Yes...for certain characters nowadays

Apparently Nier Automata's making a comeback? Hope so. It was hinting at big stuff when it last got hiatus'ed

MAL says Dungeon Meshi is gonna air this season but I doubt that

I'm also gonna watch the new Superman cartoon since a friend's letting me borrow another friend's Max account (I COULD technically reactive my account, but I hate how WB cut most of their projects & library for tax write-offs). And I'm 2 episodes away from finishing Iruma season 3, so once I'm done with that, it's onto Saiki K to watch during my lunch breaks when there isn't a seasonal anime to watch. ...Though I'm kinda wondering if I should swap it for Nanbaka now... Eh I already had the poll, so might as well stick to the poll until I finish Big O

What I'm Playing:

Just finished the 2nd labyrinth of Persona Q. I'm not really looking forward to replaying the 3rd labyrinth since it's horror themed. (Plus this was around the time I actually had to start playing with a guide because of a few FOE puzzles. Gonna be distracting to do so as I play). That being said I love that this combines EO dungeon exploration with Persona combat. Makes me wonder if I should try to get back to EO4 or see if I should get EO3 on modern consoles

Other potential interests: Ghost Trick (got the special edition right when I was in the middle of my Persona Q replay), 999 on Vita (solves the issue of not being able to play the updated version at work), possibly get back to Personas 2-5 (after I read the manga for the first game; keep forgetting to do that), maybe explore my Steam library since I have a few games there now thanks to the summer sale, maybe get back to playing Fantasy Life until I get to Al Majiik (though I forgot how tedious it is to grind for jobs). Just man. While I'm sad there's no FEMC for the P3 remake, I'm still super excited for it

Though with that being said it feels weird to buy games I already own just on different consoles. It'd be one thing if there were remakes/reboots, but nah. I just have Nier on both PS4 and Steam now. Game collecting's a weird hobby, but one I enjoy nonetheless

Other Stuff:

Anxiety spiked a bit today after seeing discourse start to pop up here again & cringing at past mistakes I've made, hence the checkup post you see now

While I'm cool with my job, I don't like how it consumes so much of my free time/energy. If I can get paid enough to work 4 days without me having to do 10 hour work days, that'd be pretty neat

Barbie movie's in a few weeks oh boy

Another con's happening at the end of the month, but it will be like 3 hours away. Gonna go with a friend then but hopefully my car sickness doesn't kill me.

Then the next con I definitely want to go to is in September

And after that I'm gonna see Hadestown with another friend

Not sure what to do for a Halloween shindig with friends. And it might be the brainrot talking but I kinda wanna go as Shinjiro from Persona 3? Though I also want my coworkers to recognize my costume, so I might need to start looking for Vampire Hunter D attire now.

THUS ENDS THE CHECKUP!

[kayo-min]

Hello! Little update~

I reached 1k followers on here, thank you so much everyone!! When I opened Bleach 2022 requests I was around 420 (haha) mark and it’s incredible to see the growth now, I truly appreciate it! ;w;

Things got busy for me for so I apologize for another gap break of the Bleach requests. Unfortunately, the gap will extend; I have to work on some personal art for a passion project(s) at the moment but I’ll still try to weave in the remaining requests if I can! ｡ﾟ(ﾟ´ω`ﾟ)ﾟ｡  As of now I have 7 Bleach requests left! If the break is still ongoing, I most likely will work on them when TYBW season 2 airs.

Thank you everyone again for the huge milestone and for all the support! 💕

kayomin

[hirako5hinji]

random non-contextual drabble of a conversation between aizen and shinji post!TYBW:

          Once again, that Aizen is being so forthcoming is…difficult to fathom. The tendency to overthink when it comes to this man is strong, as always. Layers upon layers of silken deception and subterfuge over the centuries has rendered Shinji unable to simply, blindly, trust in his senses anymore when it involves all that comes from Aizen. Every word, every gesture, every unspoken nuance. The urge to reexamine and carefully pore over it all, turn them around and around in his mind, mulling them over like maybe they will reveal hidden secrets if he looks hard enough. But that is also dangerous. Sometimes, the truth is as is. It is really not that deep. There are no buried depths to unearth.

               “ Yes, barely. The Quincy sure kicked our asses good. ” Shinji does not deny, because Aizen is right. Woefully unprepared and taken off guard, struck repeatedly again and again in quick succession by a shattering series of turbulences that had shaken the Gotei to its core in recent times, the biggest of which was the audacious coup d’état perpetrated by none other than this man before him. Yet he still has the gall to sit there and talk about how he was the one who saved the day (true and undeniable, for without that strength surely they would have been destroyed), but Shinji cannot help but think that a lot of those lives lost as collateral damage could also have been preserved, if this man who claimed to only want to help had done so in a way that hadn’t weakened the Gotei to the point where it was finally advantageous for the Wandenreich to attack in the first place. The resentment is real. The simmering anger, impossible to ­mask. “ Are ya seekin’ praise or credit for yer meritorious deeds? Isn’t this- ” he gestures vaguely to the quasi-pleasant surroundings of the man’s paroled residence; it is at least head and shoulders, hell, an entire torso above the black pit of despair that is Muken. “ - already a nod of recognition towards yer merciful intervention, even when ya provided it with such great reluctance? ”

          The thread of sarcasm that leaks from his tone annoys him, because the control of emotion is something he very much desires to keep a tight rein on whenever Aizen is concerned…but that is slowly unraveling too, in frustration. A weapon of war, Aizen had bitterly labeled himself, but aren’t they all? This is the type of world they exists in; fight to live or perish by the wayside, and Kyouraku had dragged Aizen out kicking and screaming to perform his duty. He pauses, takes a deep breath and holds it, counting the seconds for as long as he can until the disquiet is silently strangled out of existence, his lungs starting to burn. Then, he exhales…and breathes.

               “ …Yer right. Yer strength saved us all. I’m grateful ya fought on our side. ” And he is. He really is. There was true hopelessness and despair, the day the Wandenreich invaded. He can still taste it now, the raw acridness of smoke and fire and destruction, the sharp tang of blood and terror and wailing grief in the air. They were so close to losing it all, until Aizen’s power surged and he pulled off that spectacular act of sacrifice completely out of the left field, buying precious time for Ichigo to finish Yhwach. Even now, Shinji wonders at the other’s motive, wonders why the other chose to do what he did, even if he knows that he will likely never get a straight answer. His eyes continue to seek Aizen’s firmly, trying to read beyond what the other allows him to see. His voice…softens. “ Why couldn’t ya have chosen to do that from the start? Ya already knew that ya couldn’t convince Yamamoto, of course ya wouldn’t be foolhardy enough to seek that direct path. There are other routes; did ya even try? How could it be that yer immediate conclusion was to plan a bloody coup? What the hell were ya even thinking? ”

          Kyouraku, Ukitake. Even Unohana. The previous Soutaichou was notoriously rigid and unyielding, but even a leader would not be able to lead if his followers refused to follow. And Aizen have proven himself charismatic and strong. Inspiring, even. He had been told that the younger Shinigami had idolized him, during his tenure as Shinji’s successor and predecessor. Yet oddly enough, he steered clear of the older Captains and kept his activities low profile. “ I mean it when I say that ya’ve got no faith in yerself. I ain’t referrin’a strength and intelligence, because in those yer excessively proficient and we all know it. I’m talkin’ ‘bout yer inability to establish genuine connections with others, in a way that exposes yer vulnerability. ” All his followers were younger…and depended on him to a certain extent. Even Gin and Kaname. Even his ranks of arrancars and espadas, who were all beholden to him in a way that placed them in a lower position below him, however powerful they were independently. “ Rather than not botherin’a establish trust because ya’ve got no need for it, isn’t it more because ya’ve got no faith in yer own ability ‘ta earn trust, in a way that does not involve using yer power as a crutch or a bargaining tool? ”

          He wants to hunch up like some tortoise, defensive and protective, as if Aizen will take something of value otherwise. Tensed…but also knowing all too well that the other man is not wrong with his pointed remarks. But neither is Seireitei, at least not in the ruling that had resulted in a one-hundred-year long exile for them who have been maligned and tarred, their reputations dragged through the mud and blackened…for a sin not of their choosing. Once upon a time, he was angry. Once upon a time, he raged, and he roiled with seething hatred. He was through with it all. In denial. In bargaining. In grief. And then, finally, acceptance. The past was the past. The years have tempered his fury and smothered the helpless impotence of being abandoned by the very organization they are meant to die for, that will also leave them to die unyieldingly. But this and that, are two different things.

          Shinji glares exasperatedly at Aizen. “ Funny ya brought that up, seein’ as YOU were the whole main cause of our miseries. Ya wanna be thanked again, is that it? ” If Shinji is still disappointed in Seireitei and the Gotei, it is not because they had once been deemed dangerous and had to be exiled for their conditions. Because that was the truth. Back then, they had been out of control, completely out of their minds and irrational, driven by howling instinct and violence. Dangerous and corrupted beings entirely unknown as a new, forbidden hybrid of powerful entities. They were a high-risk peril not just to themselves, but to everyone around them. Those were all true. Until they had been stabilized, until they learned that it was possible to control the feral, corrupted entities that lurked in their souls…there was no telling if they would go berserk and destroy everything in their way until they had to be put down like rabid animals. Coming from the Gotei’s purview, Shinji understands that trepidatious reservation.

               “ I don’t disagree that Seireitei is too entrenched in tradition and unyieldin' laws…and I don’t disagree that a fresh start might be ideal…but so what? ” he scoffs, gaze still hard, voice still low. “ How will yer leadership be any better? You, who turned us against our will, you, who made use of anyone and everyone like expendable pawns just for yer own agenda. You, who could not even spare yer own allies and the innocent. A hundred years passed, and in all that time ya managed to do more harm than good to the people whom you were s'posed to look out for. Is this yer definition of a better system? Seireitei as she is now is full of monsters, true. ” 

          Because even Shinji, himself, has to become one whenever it is necessary. 

               “ But do not think, not for even a second, that yer not also one of them. ”

[amethystconstellation]

Shunsui Birthday Blurb

Okay so this is the first time I’m writing something like this. If you have any tips for me to get better, please let me know in the comments or message me. I want to get better at writing in the story sense just so I can write some nice things for myself. (Like I love the black reader tags with all my heart and soul but I really need some fluff right now 😅 So if I get better at this, I’ll start writing some fluff soon).

So of course my inspiration comes from the fact that Bleach, one of my fave anime shows from when I was a kid, returns and I get to see the love of my life Shunsui again.

You know it’s funny. When I was a kid, I always liked Shunsui. He was funny and laidback and him and Jushiro were the best friend dynamic I always loved. But I also thought he was super cool and really intuitive because he was really good and looking deeper into situations and because of how he presented himself outwardly, people would think he’s assuming and he would use that to his advantage. BUT he was still a captain and was mentored by Yamamoto so everyone new there was something special about him. And he was always like a teddy bear to me because he did show a lot of care and considerations to others as time went on.

And now that I’m older, that just morphed into him turning into my man my man my man because well…. HE’S GREAT! I don’t know what to tell you.

Now with TYBW coming back, we get to see more of his character and how he thinks because he was made soutaicho. I also want to do like my own head cannon deep dives into his character because he’s really just an overall interesting character. That’s what these little blurbs are for. It’s going to be out of order because TYBW is ongoing and I’m able to keep up with it easier than the old series (which I’m rewatching right now) if that makes sense.

Also I am going to write in his perspective. If there is any instance where I accidentally mess that up in the writing, please let me know.

And I’m going to be mainly basing this off the anime, I am going to read/re-read TYBW and update these when I have the chance and time but right everything is anime based.

But yeah. Sorry for being long winded. Here’s my writing below under the read more button. I hope you guys like it too.

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TYBW Ep 1: The Blood Warfare

Warnings: Anime spoilers but other than that none. Again if I missed

something let me know! 🙏🏾

Something’s off with the air today but what? I don’t know.

I’m sitting and drinking some sake looking out the window from my office. Well, more like nursing it really. I haven’t drank much of it because today just doesn’t feel right to me.

On the Karakura side of things, everything seems fine. The usual hollow appears, we send Soul Reapers to handle the problem. But if push comes to show, we have them and, most importantly, him on our side to help.

Ichigo Kurosaki and his friends, Orihime Inoue, Yasutora Sado, and Uryu Ishida.

He’s one interesting child alright. He’s got us out of tighter spots with dealing with everything that’s happened.

So much has happened since Rukia has met.

It feels like it was just yesterday that he ran in here with his friends to save her from execution and then everything happened so fast.

Aizen, Tousen, and Gin, to a major extent, were revealed as traitors. The Bounts emerged again along with Ran’Thao and ultimately became extinct. The arrancars and thus Aizen returning. The Fullbringers. Kisuke returning to clear his name and the downfall of Aizen’s plan.

We’re lucky to have him help. It’s unfortunate he’s so young. Not just in soul years (?) but just in general human years as well.

I have a feeling that fate is not done with Jim’s and his friends yet but we’ll have his back. Besides knowing him, he’ll want to help even willing to risk his life in the process.

But something weird is going on here. Whole communities in the Rukon district have been disappearing without a trace. The latest incident being in Sabitsura, the West 64 District in Rukon Ikkaku and Yumichika, the 3rd and 5th seat of Squad 11 are there now helping with the investigation.

I wonder if they’ll find something in this dis—

“Hm?”

Someone’s spiritual pressure disappeared just now. I have a bad felling about this—

Someone else’s spiritual pressure is gone…

…..It was Lieutenant Sasakibe’s. I knew something was wrong with today.

It’s only a matter of time before Old Man Yama calls the captains together again.

“Captain Kyoraku.” Nanao’s voice cut through my thoughts.

“Oh, Nanao. Haha. Looks like you found me. What is it?”

She furrowed her brows and I can see the worry and stress in her face.

After a brief pause, she finally tells me, “Soutaicho Yamamoto has called for an emergency Captains’ meeting and has asked for all Captains to report to him immediately.”

I stand up and put on my Sugegasa hat to get ready to head to Old Man Yama and the others.

“Okay. I’ll head over immediately.”

Walking out the door and heading to the meeting place, I can’t help but wonder.

How bad is this going to be?

I should’ve known that peace in the Seireitei would be fleeting and would only last for so long.

With a deep sigh, I said to myself, “I guess it’s time to go back to work.”

[azulawriting]

The Fullbring arc, oh boy

Recently, I watched a video essay detailing how the fullbring arc was, in fact, the best arc in Bleach. The reasons given were somewhat compelling before I read the arc. I mean, I don’t think I could’ve enjoyed the Soul Society arc as much as I did if it wasn’t for the Substitute Shinigami arc, which still is, to me, the main reason why I got hooked on this show/manga. I daresay that the first arc of Bleach is even more enjoyable in manga format. There’s a bunch of cut content that makes it all the more addicting to me, even now.

When it comes to my impressions of the Fullbring arc in the anime, I was surprised to know it wasn’t yet another filler arc. I think that, like many others back then, ending Bleach after Aizen’s defeat was a good decision. It was the culmination of the story, and I really wasn’t sure where the story would even go after it. The Fullbring Arc was interesting as a time skip and how Ichigo would deal with being a completely normal human being while all his friends were not, but I would not have “dragged it” for an entire arc, however brief it could be.

My feelings towards this arc have somewhat changed with the manga, but not that much. I think that, in hindsight, it is a necessary arc for TYBW and it introduces a “power-up” for characters like Orihime and Chad, which will become useful for the upcoming arc. I think Ichigo’s introspection about where he would go with no powers is rather powerful, and it gets to shine a little bit more in the manga, but it is not part of my favourite arcs in this manga. Again, I don’t think the magic of the Substitute Shinigami arc will ever be reached again, though I will admit the Fullbring Arc gets very close.

I will give the manga credit where it’s due in that it made the stakes about Ichigo’s character and how poorly he could handle ever coming back to being a nobody, basically. I think it’s something not a lot of shonen manga have tackled something as heavy as “what would happen if MC lost his powers but the threats didn’t stop?”. His dependence on Ginjo and Execution built a good betrayal plotline but, and I do feel bad to say this, I don’t find any of the new characters all that enjoyable. And that’s my main issue with it. The first arc introduced a varied and interesting cast of side characters, but there’s not much of that in this arc. Tsukishima is somewhat interesting as a villain due to his power, but not much else. The same goes for the rest of Execution, who, at least to me, don’t stray too far from being tropes.

It’s a shame, really. I appreciated the flashbacks for Ginjo and Tsukishima in particular, but man do I wish we had more. Then again, that would have perhaps played against the mystery/betrayal plotline that was decently built over the span of the arc.

I don’t think I’ll continue reading the manga from this point on. I hated the Quincy arc for how rushed and outright bad it was. The anime is airing right now and I’m honestly more interested in revisiting the arc by watching the adaptation. From what I’ve heard, Kubo has the reins and will add some anime-original content to improve the arc. So far, I like the anime and I hope a certain captain does not miraculously come back to the battlefield. If he does, for any reason at all, I’ll have to wonder if the rest of the arc will be improved or just rehash the mistakes from the manga. I don’t want it to come to that.

Before I finish this post, I wanted to add one last thing. Since I mentioned Kazui in my first post ever about bleach in this blog, I do plan on making an even longer rant on the Hell chapter and my problems with it, as well as speculate as to where it could go, assuming it ever gets another chapter. I might do this old blog justice again and write something short for the Hell arc, but I doubt I will even get the time for it. We’ll see.

[littleeyesofpallas]

So, did you watch episode 5 of Bleach TYBW? I'm a bit surprised by the decisions the production team made.

I did. I'll be honest, I'm not as gungho about the new anime as a lot of fans have been, but I'm trying to not be too picky about it, so I can just try to enjoy myself. Most of the shuffling around of plot points have been pretty inconsequential, especially considering how little of the plot in the first wave of invasion actually carry forward into anything meaningful after the training arc in the middle.

Gotta admit though, of all the things i've been disappointed with, As Nodt's voice being so normal is definitely not what I was expecting. A lot of the textography and voice bubbles around As Nodt's line, as well his use of katakana over hiragana, except for particles, gave a pretty distinct impression that he had something weird about his voice, even if it was just distortion from speaking through his mask, or a stilted cadence, or even a slight accent.

speaking of accents, still shocked that Mask does not have the fullblown bad westerner accent like Jack and Mary King from Getter Robo or something. I know it's far from being his moment yet, but he really feels like he should be louder and more obnoxious.

In general the sound design has really been bugging me. It's awkward and often really empty? And other times the use of old tracks or the new versions of them don't really feel like they fit the scene? I feel like there's more to it, but like I said I've been trying to avoid just throwing myself fullbody down any of these rabbit holes for convenience's sake if nothing else...

I did appreciate Meninas being worked in as Rukia's opponent, even if only barely shown/seen. It always bugged me that in the manga she just shows up lying on the ground without explanation.

It was also fun to see an idea of how Chojiro actually used his bankai. Although it felt weird that Driscoll's was a different color when "Yellow" is in the name. Plus the way they animated it, or rather just kind of didn't felt super lame. it doesn't feel particularly electric for there to just be static pillars of "electricity" standing around. What's the point of a lightning power if not the moment lightning strikes? The lightspeed crash of empty air flashing with fire and power, shaking the earth, and then being gone before you can even really register what happened.

And it totally fit with Chojiro's fencer thing, and even a bit of his western influence and the idea of him as complementary to Genryuusai's oldfashioned and supremely Japanese(tm) demeanor. I thought the manga fairly adequately got that across, but watching Genryuusai just sort of sit there under a jiggling tower of purple light was uninspiring.

I felt like there was something I was working towards when i started working down this list of things that happened in the episode, but now I've lost track of it...

[rays-of-fire-and-ice]

Before the Dawn of War

Rating: K+

Setting: sometime between chapters 537- 545, before the Quincy completely invaded the Seireitei.

Synopsis: Unable to sleep with the impending war on her mind, Momo decides to take a walk around the Seireitei, only to discover she isn’t the only one who can’t sleep.

AN: I’ve come out of hiatus to post this one! @pinkhairedlily, this one’s for your very belated gift exchange! I was originally going to post this all the way back in the Two Weeks of Hitsuhina, but I didn’t finish it until now, and seeing as you asked for stars to be involved in your gift, I thought this story would do just the trick. I’ve always wanted to write something like this, seeing as we got little to not hitsuhina content in the TYBW arc. Prepare for some angst, but it has a fluffy ending.

Hope you all enjoy it, going back into hiatus now!

_________________________________

Momo rolls on to her side, cringing when she sees her alarm clock. A few minutes to midnight; she should have been asleep hours ago. Her usual routine is to retire to her quarters every night at nine, lights out a nine-thirty, and if she isn’t tired by then, she’ll pick up a book and read it until she’s too sleepy to keep going.

Tonight, she’d tried three different books, and none of them worked.

She clutches her futon and curls in on herself. She can’t afford to lose sleep. What if the Quincy attack again tomorrow?

The thoughts that are keeping her up go through her mind all at once and the air seems to get thicker. The property damages, the powers lost by four captains, all the causalities. The loss of the Commander General is still a sore spot, but admittedly not as much as the loss of her subordinates. Some of their names float to the surface, as do memories of her time with them – training them, eating with them, laughing and working with them.

She wipes her eyes when they start to burn, threatening to tear up. With a sigh, she lifts herself up to sit. She’s not going to fall asleep anytime soon, and no book can distract her from her thoughts. She needs to get out her room and away from the thick air that presses down her. Maybe a long walk would tire her out.

She slips on an outer robe and puts on pair of tabi and waraji before going to the door. She stops just as her hand grazes over the handle. She looks over her shoulder at Tobiume lying next to her futon. She hates that the thought of bringing her zanpakuto on a peaceful night crosses her mind. But then, is it really that peaceful? She’s taken back to the last time wartime exceptions were made, just under two years ago. Unlike then, she goes back and secures Tobiume to her hip.

The hallways are quiet, save for the few snores that waft from behind closed doors. She takes what little comfort she can from her subordinates being able to sleep soundly as she walks out of the barracks.

Only a few lights are on outside, but the crescent moon is bright enough to illuminate her path. She doesn’t have a particular destination in mind, just letting herself wonder around where she feels like. In the past, she’d only caught a glimpses of Seireitei at this time of the night – once when she’d come back from a mission in the World of Living, and another time when she had to help Rangiku get back to her quarters after drinking too much. Despite the few Shinigami who would be out for one reason or another, each time she’d noticed the stillness and quietness. It was eerie, but peaceful at the same time.

Tonight though, save for her footsteps, it’s completely silent. There’s no wind to rattle the lanterns or flag signs along the walls, and no Shinigami wondering around. Despite sensing all the reiatsu around her and having her zanpakuto at her side, Momo can’t stop gnawing sense of loneliness.

It’s not helped when she comes upon wreckage that had yet to be cleared. Ahead of her, two walls are half destroyed, and the surrounding buildings were in only slightly better condition. Caved-in roofs and broken floor tiles, and debris is strewn everywhere. On the corner of a piece of broken wall, there’s a splatter of darkened, dried blood.

With a shuddering breath, Momo is quick to turn on her heel and go down another path, getting as far away as possible. How was any of this fair? They’d just come out of a war and were thrust into another one with no time to fully recover. But there is no such thing as fairness, was there? The world goes on no matter what happens.

She halts when a pulse of reiatsu comes from one of the joint training grounds a few miles away. She frowns and looks in its direction. Hitsugaya-kun?

He’s up too?

She walks briskly towards his reiatsu, but a few seconds later it vanishes. He must be concealing it. Did he know she was coming towards him? Maybe he actually didn’t want anyone to be found… or maybe it’s a calling.

She doesn’t bother to hide her own reiatsu as she goes towards where she last sensed his. At some point her walk turns into a jog, the world around her becoming a blur. She runs down the tenth and seventh divisions, and stops at the edge of the woods. Catching her breath, she walks towards the training grounds and comes upon him a few minutes later.

He stands in middle of a training area marked out by deep cut lines in the dirt and poles in each corner, forming a large square. His back is turned to her and Hyourinmaru’s blade gleams in the moonlight as it slashes through the air. His movements are precise and repetitive, he must be practicing zanjutsu. His technique is the best shes ever seen him have. Each slice and cut is measured and controlled, the weight of his zanpakuto and the attacks he performs doesn’t causing him to teeter or lose his footing. Just how long had he been out here practicing before she found him?

She makes her steps louder as she approaches. “Hitsugaya-kun.”

He finishes the arc of an attack before he halts. He looks over his shoulder at her. “Thought it was you.”

She can’t help but smile; it’s been so long since they’ve spoken to each other. In the last several months, she’d been busy helping Shinji settle back in and repairing the damage caused by Aizen’s betrayal within her division. At most they’d spoken for five minutes in all that time. “As perceptive as always. But then, I guess I wasn’t exactly hiding my reiatsu.”

“It might be wise to, considering.”

And that dampens her mood. “Yes, you’re right.”

After a heartbeat, Toshiro relaxes his fighting stance and fully turns to her. “What’re you doing out so late?”

She sighs. “I couldn’t sleep. I thought a walk might help. What about you?”

He nods. She almost expects him to ask why she can’t sleep, but then realises he likely already knows. As a captain, she can only imagine how it must feel to lose subordinates you’re supposed to lead and look out for. Knowing him, he’s taking the causalities of his division just as hard as she is for her own, if not more so.

“I wasn’t able to sleep either,” he says. “Figured I might as well train, it could tire me out.”

Her smile half returns. “And is it?”

He considers for a moment. “Somewhat.”

She considers asking about Hyourinmaru, how Toshiro was coping with losing his bankai, but thinks better of it.

She lays a hand on Tobiume’s hilt. “Then, can I practice with you? Not sparring, I need to brush up on my zanjutsu. Maybe you could give me some pointers?”

He raises a brow, thinking. She wonders if he’s remembering the last time they’d done zanjutsu practice together. It would have been at the Academy, in her last year before she graduated.

After a moment he squares his shoulders, assuming an attack stance. “If you need them.”

She comes to his left while brushing her ponytail off her shoulder, and unsheathes Tobiume before coming to an identical stance. As one, they bring their swords in a downward strike. They do this several times before Toshiro relaxes his stance to watch her. “Be mindful of your feet,” he advises, “they look unsteady.”

Momo stops, frowning down at her legs. They’re too far apart, so she brings them in a few inches closer. At the captain’s nod of approval, they continue. There are no further interruptions, and she throws herself into every slice and cut she makes, taking on any pointers he offers. He comments on her stance, the grip of her zanpakuto, the extension of her swings and arms.

If only she had been better at this, maybe she could have somehow saved more lives. It’s a thought she knows is useless, because there is no going back. There is only now, where she has the chance to get better at this. So much had happened since she entered the Academy. Yes, she remembered being happier then, having a more optimistic lookout for the future. Back then she never knew all the subordinates she would have to look out for, or that Aizen wasn’t what he’d seemed, or that the Soul Society would be torn at the seams by his betrayal.

She needs to keep getting better for her Captain and her subordinates. For the residents of Rukongai. For those who had already been slain. She won’t let their deaths be in vain, won’t let them be part of meaningless slaughters. They helped protect the Seireitei, and now she must, so that it doesn’t crumble further. She won’t be useless, she won’t be weak.

“Hinamori, snap out of it!”

Momo chokes out a gasp, freezing completely. The shot of adrenaline that thrums in her veins fizzles away. Her hands and arms ache from throwing too much of her weight behind her attacks and from gripping Tobiume too hard. Her throat feels a little raw, she must have started yelling. Her skin stings against the cold air, sweat threatening to form along with tears. Her whole body completely deflates when she lets out a long breath. She can feel herself starting to tip forward when Toshiro steps in front and catches her by the shoulders.

His gaze is stern, but not unkind. “Come on, let’s take a break.”

She sheathes Tobiume away and lets him lead her out of the forest. Tremors run up and down inside her body, not materialising on the outside. She’s light-headed, her mind swirling with no real coherent thought.

“I got carried away,” she murmurs. “I’m sorry.”

His frown deepens. “Just rest for now.”

A gust of wind comes through, rustling the leaves and their uniforms. The back of a tenth division barracks comes into view behind the trees and shrubbery. He leads her there with a steady hand on the back of her shoulder.

Once they emerge from the tree line, she tilts her head upwards, letting the wind cool of her skin. It’s only then she notices the stars. Perhaps it’s her because of her current state of mind, but they’re entrancing.

“There’s so many of them,” she murmurs absentmindedly.

Even when Toshiro guides her to sit on the barrack’s veranda, she doesn’t look away from them. They glitter against the dark blue and around the crescent moon. Without realising, Momo lies back on the veranda, her view partly obscured by the awning.

Toshiro, who had been confused at first, follows her gaze to the night sky. He rests Hyourinmaru against the veranda’s edge and sits next to her. She it’s been so long since it’d been this quiet, with the air so fresh and freeing, and the whole world is at peace. She can almost forget the reason she is up this late.

Her lips lift into a small smile. “Remember when we used to stargaze?”

He lets out a huff. “You always came up with the weirdest constellations.”

“I was more creative. You even admitted a few times you could see mine!”

“Only to stop you from complaining. At least mine were straightforward.”

She snorts. “Your mean like ‘box’ or ‘a box inside a box’? Your best one was ‘watermelon slice’.”

“Better than ‘cat chasing a foot’.”

“You remember that?”

“It was too strange to forget.”

She can hear the eyeroll in his voice, and despite the urge to cringe, she manages a chuckle. She thinks to ask him ‘And what do you see now?’, but stops. As children they could make up all sorts of shapes from the stars, but she’d found that ability dissipated with every year she grew older. Back then, she felt like they’d had a small power over the night sky, that she and Toshiro could shape the stars into anything they wanted.

Now the stars are beautiful, far away things, and make her feel very, very small. She cannot change them, not anymore.

She looks at Toshiro, cast in moonlight and leaving a long shadow trailing behind him. Even in moments of rest he can be as still and solemn as a statue, with a coldness that is at odds with the boy she grew up with.

It’s then as her heart squeezes in her chest. She’s missed him so much. She hasn’t spent any time with him in so long, and because of that it makes him just that little bit harder to read compared to before Aizen’s betrayal. Were they growing apart? What is he thinking right now?

It’s then she sees it, and she inwardly curses at herself for not noticing sooner.

“Are you okay?” she asks.

He twists around. “What?”

It’s barely there, but the shadows are a bit deeper in his cheeks, his arms are thinner, the side of his palm has a thick blister, and his knuckles are more pronounced. His zanjutsu technique showed he’d been training for long periods, but…

She pushes herself up to sit. “Are you eating enough?”

“Of course, I am,” he half grumbles. “Why are you asking that?”

“You look thinner. Are you training too much? You shouldn’t push yourself beyond your limits, Hitsugaya-kun.”

Something in his eyes turns steely. The air around them changes, becoming still and thicker. The corners of his eyes and lips tighten a fraction.

She’d had a fair idea of why he was in this state, but his reaction snaps it into place. With some hesitation, she pries, “Is it because of what happened to Hyourinmaru?”

His gaze drops to his knees.

The squeeze in her chest tightens even more. She resists the urge to put a hand on his shoulder, unsure how he’d react, and instead presses on, “My Captain told me you’ve lost your bankai and the ability to communicate with Hyourinmaru. I know you were training for months in those caves, and even before then, you’ve always worked hard with Hyourinmaru to train together. I can’t imagine how that feels to be torn away from…”

She fumbles to a quiet. Nothing she can say will help him, nor make her understand what he’s going through. She lowers her head, letting out a breath to try and relieve the heaviness building her chest. “Sorry, I shouldn’t have brought it up.”

“There’s no need to apologise.” Toshiro lets out an exhale of his own, rising his head to the stars once more. “There’s nothing I can do, so I have to focus on what I can do now. I can still create ice, and Matsumoto and I can have been working on a technique together using our zanpakuto powers. So long as I can still fight, with or without Hyourinmaru, I can still protect the Soul Society.”

She hates the resignation in his voice. As always, Toshiro looks to the future, not always dealing with how he truly feels. He looks out for others rather than himself. She imagines right now he is thinking of his subordinates, how he can best protect and fight alongside them. Even so…

Momo looks off to the side, and the weight of it all comes back. She bites the inside of her cheek to stop the threat of tears. “…Please don’t exhaust yourself. Please don’t push yourself so much. So many have died, Shiro, and I…” I don’t want you to die too. “I know I need to move forward, to focus on what I can do now, but even so I can’t forget who died.” She shakes her head, vision starting to blur. “I won’t let their deaths be in vain. I have to protect the Soul Society, I can’t let it crumble.”

“It’s for that reason we must continue training.” The strength in his voice returned. “That’s all our responsibility as lieutenants and captains. No one’s death will be in vain. There will be a time to mourn them, but all we keep moving forward, it’s all we can do right now.”

His gaze slides back to her, hardened with resolve. “I want to ensure no else dies under my watch. If I die to save others, so be it, but if I can help it I won’t.” He leans in a fraction more. “Don’t doubt your own strength. Your zanjutsu is good and your kido I know will be on par with a Captain's technique. You can still look out for the subordinates who are alive, you can still fight to protect them.”

Momo wipes her eyes. As a Shinigami she had been taught and trained to deal with death of her division members. She’d seen many before this war with the Quincy, but even so, nothing could have prepared her for casualties this fight had brought.

She knows he’s right, and although it doesn’t bring her complete comfort, some of weight lifts from her. It’s a bitter pill to swallow, but she acknowledges the grief and guilt swimming within her, and that there is nothing she can do for the dead until this is over. She must forge a new way forward for the living, for her captain and friends.

“Likewise, Hitsugaya-kun. You may not have your bankai, but you have so much strength. Together with Rangiku-san, you’ll be formidable as always.”

His brows tilt upward ever so slightly and his eyes becoming half-lidded. It’s a hidden heartache for a part of his soul, lost to the enemy. There must be a void within him, a place where Hyourinmaru used to reside and call out from now empty. He must feel incomplete without him. He was training this much to forge a way forward, to be as strong as he can on the battlefield with his bankai. Even so, did he still have his doubts about his strength? Or perhaps about…

Momo resists the urge to hug him, instead putting a hand on his shoulder. Exhaling deeply, she starts that new way forward with a vow. “I hope after all of this, we can finally have peace. Even if it takes years for this war to end, I’ll fight for that peace. I’m going to fight for Seireitei, and I’m going to fight to make sure you and the other Captains get their bankai back.”

She nods towards his zanpakuto. “We’ll find a way, I. We won’t go into a time of peace without everyone’s powers being restored.”

He searches her eyes, for what she’s not sure. Several heartbeats later he must find what he’s looking for, because his usual frown returns and his gaze hardens once more. “Typical,” he mutters. “Always looking out for others…” His fingers lightly come over hers.

The blister catches her attention. She slips her hand out from beneath his fingers and place it over his, He watches her with a perplexed frown as she guides their hands down for both of them to see.

She hovers her free hand over the blister. “You might know this kido already, but just in case…”

Momo whispers the incantation, and midway through the familiar glow emanates from for palm. We’ll know the first two lines, but the three that come next will likely be new to him. After completing the chant, most of Toshiro’s hand is enveloped in green-blue light.

He frowns, watching the blister heal. “It’s accelerated.”

“That’s what happens when you know the complete incantation.”

“I’ve only ever known the first two lines.”

“I was the same for a while, but I did some studying into healing spells and discovered the full incantation. I don’t know why they didn’t teach us the full chant at the Academy. Maybe they thought in battle it’d probably be hard to do the complete incantation, and it’s effective enough with just the first two lines.” With the blister gone, she lowers her hand and curls it into a loose fist, cancelling the spell. “Want me to cast it again?”

He shakes his head and instead repeats back the lines he hadn’t heard before, word for word. Momo sighs with a smile. Trust him to flawlessly recall only after hearing her say them once. She expects him to raise his hand away from hers, but he doesn’t, instead just running his fingers over where the wound had been, the skin as good as new.

“Why did you show me that?” he asks.

Her smile becomes wobbly. “We don’t know what will happen tomorrow, or even in the next minute. After tonight I may not see you again before the enemy returns.” She gives his healed hand a squeeze. “I know you have the strength and will to fight this war, but please stay safe.”

“It's like I said, I don't plan on dying.” His gaze turns stern. “Just watch yourself, and come out of this in one piece. If worse comes to worse, send out a kido signal.”

Her heart flutters, and her smile is restored. “Likewise.”

Reassured, they find their eyes going back to the stars. She’ll have to go soon, finally starting to feel the dregs of sleep ebb in. Until then she sits with him in the silence, watching the stars, taking in the peace and being here with him.

The stars and moon have never changed, but their world has, and after a time, it will change again. Even so, the stars will always be there, forever glittering in the night sky, a constant even when the clouds are blocking them.

[chiapetirl]

Bleach: Revisited Series

Hello, (Bleach) Tumblr! I’m back after... a while!

I used to be chiapet-irl on tumblr, and now I’m back to remake my fanfiction-based tumblr. I am the author of the ongoing Bleach: Revisited Series and just wanted to make a post promoting it real quick!

What is B:R?

Bleach: Revisited is a canon rewrite of the original Bleach Series, starting from the beginning of the Arrancar arc and going towards (and past) the TYBW arc. It is an IchiRuki based series, but IchiHime shippers are welcome and loved. There are a few OC’s, LGBT+ pairings, and quite of bit of world building, so if those are your things, then give it a read! 

We are currently at two novels (over half a million words) so it is a long, long series (just so you’re aware!).

Here’s a quick excerpt from the first book:

"You play guitar?" Tatsuki asked, her eyes wide. "H-how'd you get a guitar in the Soul Society?"

Shuhei finished chewing, fishing another noodle from his bowl. "I picked one up while on a mission here," he said. "It was about a month or two ago, I think. This guy was throwing it away, which I thought was strange, since it was almost in perfect shape." He shook his head, smirking a bit. "I think he just couldn't figure out to use it," he explained, "or he had given up on learning how to."

Laughing, Tatsuki shook her head. "That's a shame," she said. "At least you got a free guitar out of it, though. You'll have to play sometime for us!" She took another bite, excited. Shuhei looked a little embarrassed, placing his utensils on the table.

"W-well, I've never played for an audience, you see," he said. "My division members don't really like hearing me play, so I kind of… have to go off and practice on my own, so I'm not that sure I'm good at it."

Tatsuki looked shocked, finishing her chewing. "If you ever need to practice, you can just chill here," she said. "We've got a music store nearby that has tutorials and stuff, and I don't really mind if you practice in the guest room. I… don't really have many people over, and my parents are usually gone anyways."

"Y-you'd seriously let me practice here?" Shuhei asked, nearly choking on his food. "Even if it sucked?"

Tatsuki shrugged, raising her bowl and drinking the broth at the bottom in one go. With a sigh of satisfaction, she wiped her mouth and smiled. "I don't see why the hell not," she said. "I'm not here all the time anyways, and even if I was, I feel someone should support you in your hobbies. It sucks when your friends and coworkers don't, and I feel if anyone should, it should be me." Setting her bowl down, she stood, leaning over the table, hand extended. "Does that sound like a good deal to you?"

It took Shuhei a few seconds to contemplate what was happening. Here was a human, basically asking him to be her friend, to support him in his own hobbies. This day just kept getting more and more interesting. "I-I-I guess so," he managed, slowly raising his hand. He grasped her hand, feeling her shake their clasped hands up and down three times.

"Then it's settled," she said confidently, placing her empty dishes in the kitchen. "You can come back here and practice as many times as you want. Ya know, after we defeat Aizen and all that." The clink of her dishes on the counter filled the small pause, her back turned to him.

There it was again, that small terror in the back of her mind. The possibility that, after all this, they may not win.

"We will win," Tatsuki said aloud, mostly for herself. "And when we do, I'm going to sleep for at least three days straight."

Shuhei laughed a little, resting his head in his hands. He knew he'd need at least a full week's worth of recovery, especially with how little sleep he'd gotten. "Same here," he said between laughs. "And it'll hopefully be a dreamless sleep." They both laughed until they struggled to breathe, the air silent once more.

"What will you do if you have to fight Tosen?" Tatsuki asked, her eyes serious once more. The question ate away at her mind, unable to stay silent. "Do you think you could fight him?" she continued, looking over at the tired Shinigami. Shuhei lifted his head from his hands, the shadows over his eyes harsh.

"Probably," he replied at last. "I gotta protect my friends, after all."

A knock on the door interrupted them, causing the two of them to tense up. "Hisagi?!" called the muffled, familiar voice of Ikkaku. "Let's go! We've got another long night ahead of us! Yer late!"

Shuhei shook his head, standing now. "Gotta go," he called over his shoulder to Tatsuki, quickly grabbing Kazeshini off the floor, sliding the sword into his belt. His hand rested on the hilt, contemplating for a moment.

"Thank you, Arisawa," Shuhei said, standing at the front door. His head was turned away from her.

Tatsuki tilted her head, asking, "For what?" She seemed confused.

His hand on the door handle, Shuhei simply replied, "For everything. For showing me that I was wrong about humans." His head turned, the 69 tattoo on his face revealed. "For showing me that, even in death, we are still very much the same."

With that, he opened the door, stepping out into the night air.

This account will occasionally post updates on the series. Currently, we are on book two, Bleach: Re(Vers)ed, which looks at both the Fullbringer arc and a dash of Hell Verse (and we are nearing the halfway mark!).

Links:

Ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15681246/chapters/36433008

FanFiction: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13014282/1/Bleach-Revisited

[floppydisk7000]

Why do I have mixed feelings about Bleach coming back? My only hope right now is I hope they make Ichigo and Rukia fight Yhwach together, give Orihime a better outfit and fill in the plot holes that weren’t filled and maybe make Ichiruki canon as a bonus. I don’t know. The manga ending is kind of what “ruined,” Bleach for me tbh. I’m sorry I’m bugging you, I just don’t know who to talk to about all this.

just the thought of seeing it animated again makes the kid in me happy, but I’ll probably have those exact mixed feelings while it airs 😖like at the very least have rukia involved in some way in the final battle…it would be nice to see changes made in tybw anime but i’m not going to have any expectations. rn i’m just thinking about that mini rukia arc with her bankai getting animated tbh 😆focus on the good things!! the music will be so good too ahhh. new op and eds!! new soundtracks!! 💖🥳 

basically just ignore the ending which is a looong way off from being animated and just look forward to the bits we *will* like… but i get you and i’m sorry the ending ruined Bleach for you ☹️

[kodoku-no-maria]

Why do you say bleach's gotten a remake? Is it some new news or just something you're speculating? If it's just something you think why so? Thanks in avance for the answer!

It's not new news.

It's just my assumption. Prediction, if you want.

I had this theory before the announcement, that if they ever revive Bleach to animate the last arc, it's gonna be a part of a REMAKE.

Like FMA, like Fruits Basket.

If you watch the PV for the anniversary projects. You can see that they show dates, and the unknown parts of the dates are represented by XX(I guess it's a play on Roman numeral 20). When the PV comes to the part about the anime, they show different manga panels and 2021/XX/XX as in "it's gonna come out in 2021, month and day unknown"

Then they start actually showing manga panels from TYBW arc. And the date changes from 2021/XX to XXXX/XX as in "we dont know what year in the airing of the anime we'll come to this arc, but we will"

If you count the episodes in Bleach, 366 episodes. 166 of them are filler episodes, and 203 are canon manga episodes.

But even the canon episodes, because of Kubo's shitty pacing are stretched beyond possible (like what's happening right now with One Piece)

So, if they remake it, with normal pacing of the story, and no fillers. It's gonna sum up to what, 150 episodes? Maybe even less. And that's like three years of airing time.

It also just doesn't make sense to start the anime right where the last one ended. Because yes, we remember bleach, and maybe some people from the next gen do too, because we recommended it. But so many people don't.

From the business point, it's just better to start from the beginning. Fans will watch it like they're rewatching it,but it's gonna be better drawn. And new fans will fall in love with exactly what we fell in love with. The beginning and the SS arc.

And then, just like everyone else people are gonna stay for the ride, to see it to the end.

And then there are just going to be more people disappointed with the ending, unless they want to pull a wild card and rewrite the fuck out of it.

[sequencefairy]

Pay No Heed to Fallen Skies

Ichiruki. AU, post-TYBW. Canon-typical violence. This got away from me a bit. ~2200 words. 

Ichigo has always known that his choices have consequences. 

[ AO3 ] 

Ichigo is headed across the wall tonight, Zangetsu strapped to his back and the gathering fizz of power in his blood. There’ve been reports of hollow incursions in some of the lower Rukongai, and Ichigo is not about to leave them unchecked, regardless of what the official word from command is.

Rukia catches up with him just as he’s preparing to leap the wall. “What are you doing?” she hisses, and Ichigo shrugs. She knows that the orders this morning didn’t sit well with him, and that the white haori chafes, but orders are orders and disobeying them is treason. They both know, all too well, the penalty for treason. 

Ichigo ignores her and jumps the wall, shunpo lightening his landing. Rukia lands beside him, and catches him by the hand before he can take off again. “Listen to me,” she says, and Ichigo turns to look at her.

“No,” he says, “you know this isn’t right. You know it, I know it, everyone knows it. I’m not leaving these people to die, because Kyoraku said so.”

“The captain-commander has his reasons,” Rukia protests, but Ichigo shakes his head. 

“That’s bullshit, and you know it.” 

“Ichigo–“ 

“Either come with me or don’t, Rukia. I don’t have time for this.” Ichigo steps out of her reach and launches himself into shunpo, streaking off across the rooftops. He doesn’t stop to check and see if Rukia is following him, focusing instead on the telltale reiatsu signature of a group of hollows in the distance. 

Ichigo is drawing Zangetsu as he drops out of the slipstream, and his first swing cleaves the first hollow in half, it’s mask splitting cleanly. He hears Rukia before he sees her; she drops out of shunpo muttering a kido spell under her breath and obliterating the next hollow that charges them in a flash of blue light. 

The fight that follows is fierce and violent. 

It’s close quarters in this alley; Ichigo ducks under Rukia’s next volley of kido flames and throws himself into a skidding slide, Zangetsu raised and it’s keen edge slicing through muscle and sinew as he disarms the hollow, before rolling to his feet and turning, shattering it’s mask with one hit. Rukia freezes the next one in place, and then runs it through, the roar of its death making Ichigo grit his teeth as he leaps and then drops, driving the point of Zangetsu into the soft spot at the top of the spine of another hollow. It dies in a gush of murky blood, and Ichigo closes his eyes against the spray. 

They dispatch the last hollow together, and as it’s reishi dissipates into the clear night sky, the street is silent once more around them. 

Ichigo takes stock. Rukia has a scrape across one cheek, and her blade drips, inky blood running in rivulets down the silver surface. Ichigo is breathing hard, and he can feel the beginnings of several bruises in the throbbing ache all along his left side. Rukia lets her shikai go with a whisper of frigid wind that lifts the ends of her hair, and sheathes Sode no Shirayuki after flicking the blood off the length of her blade. The droplets scatter against the dirt of the alley floor and Ichigo grimaces. 

“You didn’t have to come,” he says, finally, after the silence has stretched so long that he nearly aches to fill it. 

“I know,” she answers. 

“Thank you,” Ichigo says, and then steps out of the alley. The scent of hollow blood and the taste of hollow reiatsu lingers in the air, and he wonders if there’s something they could do to cleanse the space, and he turns to ask Rukia, but she’s standing, frozen, staring at something behind him. “Rukia, wha–?” 

Ichigo doesn’t feel the first hit, but it throws him into the building across the way. He sprawls, groaning, in the rubble, Zangetsu lost to his scrabbling hands. Ichigo coughs, and rolls onto his side, propping himself up with one hand. He gets as far as lifting his head before the next hit comes. This time it is a kick to the point of his chin and Ichigo sees stars and nearly loses his tongue as his teeth clack shut. 

“Fucking Shinigami,” a voice mutters from overhead, and Ichigo opens his eyes again, now on his back, and blinks up at his attacker. “You think you can just come in here–“ the man is cut off by Rukia’s wild yell, and Ichigo watches upside down, as she jumps him, slinging her hands around his neck, sword forgotten, and tackles him to the ground, using her body weight and momentum to counter the man’s center of gravity and topple him over. 

Ichigo picks himself up from the ground, and massages the back of his neck while Rukia holds their assailant down easily. The man is frothing with rage and tugging at the binding kido Rukia slapped on him, ignoring Rukia’s admonishment that it’ll only get tighter if he keeps struggling. “She’s telling the truth, man,” Ichigo says, but the man grunts in response and tugs again against the restraints binding his hands. 

“Explain why you have attacked two Shinigami captains,” Rukia demands, and there is ice in her voice. Ichigo ignores the throb of pleasure that rides in his belly at the command in her voice, and watches their captive instead. The man is dressed like an average citizen of the Rukongai, but there’s a whiff of power about him that sets Ichigo’s teeth on edge. 

Ichigo prods him, none-so-gently, with the business end of Zangetsu. “She asked you a question, asshole.” 

“Don’t have to answer to likes of you.” The man spits, it misses Rukia’s toes by the barest of spaces. “Filthy Shinigami.” 

The insult makes Ichigo’s hackles rise, but Rukia’s hand on his arm eases the bristling rage under his skin. “It’s not worth it,” she says. Ichigo knows it’s not worth it, and to be perfectly honest, he doesn’t begrudge the man his opinion of Shinigami as a whole, but an insult to Rukia is always enough to fire his blood. He looks down at her, and falls, as usual, and completely helplessly, into her twilight eyes. 

After a long moment, Ichigo blinks and Rukia drops her gaze to the man on the ground. “What do you know about the incursions?” Rukia asks, and the man grunts. Rukia sighs, and Ichigo sheathes Zangetsu. 

“Shall we drop him at the Second division on the way home?” Ichigo’s question is all false levity. The man on the ground visibly flinches. Rukia follows Ichigo’s gaze and then looks back up at him; her mouth twists briefly in a moue of distaste at this tactic, but she will go along with him anyway.

“I think there’s a spot in the holding cells at the barracks, no need to wake the Second’s captain at this hour,” Rukia says, conversationally. “Though, it might be better to take him straight there…” Rukia trails off and their captive remains silent. 

“The Second it is,” Ichigo declares cheerfully, and heaves the man to his feet. “Have you ever travelled by shunpo?” Ichigo asks, and the man remains stonily silent. “No? Well, this might be uncomfortable.” Rukia shakes her head at Ichigo’s antics, but takes the man’s other arm, and they step into the slipstream together, whisking their captive back across the Rukongai to the wall. The three of them drop out of the slipstream, Rukia and Ichigo landing lightly, and their captive tumbling forward to his knees, retching. 

“Sorry about that,” Ichigo says, not looking very sorry at all. 

The man clears his throat and looks up the two Shinigami. “Alright,” he says. 

“Alright, what?” Ichigo says, leaning down. The man looks away, unable to meet Ichigo’s gaze. Ichigo straightens. 

“I got information,” the man says, and Rukia looks at Ichigo over his head. Their eyes meet and Ichigo nods. 

“What kind of information?” Ichigo asks. 

“Stuff about them monsters, and that guy - the one you were all lookin’ for a while back? With them googly eyes all over hisself?” 

Ichigo feels Rukia stiffen next to him. The mention of Ywhach chills him to the bones. 

“What’s your name?” Rukia asks, sinking down so she can be at his level. Ichigo remains standing. 

“Devin,” the man says, finally, though the admission seems to cost him. “I ain’t got a last name, so don’t ask.” Rukia nods, and Ichigo remembers all of a sudden that she lived in the Rukongai for decades. He forgets more often than not that this is where she came from, and the resultant swoop of shame means he misses most of what the man says next. Rukia seems satisfied with the man’s responses, and continues to question him, carefully avoiding the subject of Yhwach and sticking to the more recent incursions. 

Devin seems to relax as he and Rukia talk, and Ichigo does his best to ignore the pit of dread that has opened up in his gut. Devin’s information about the hollow attacks seems to line up with what the Captain Commander had been outlining in their meeting the other night – they come in groups of five or six, slaughter whoever happens to be in their vicinity when the gargantua rips open and then disappear, back the way they came. 

Rukia releases the binding spell before asking about Yhwach, and Ichigo feels rather than sees Devin blanch. “Them eyes,” he says, “they watch you, you know? Always watching. In every shadow.” Devin shudders. Ichigo doesn’t blame him. The night is warm, but Ichigo is covered in goosebumps and his hands have gone clammy. He wipes them on his shihakusho. Rukia’s sharp glance upwards is the only outward sign of her discomfort. Ichigo, as always, envies her control. 

They let Devin go shortly after that. Ichigo presses a card into his palm. The address is a tea house that the Kuchiki family runs in one of the middle districts of the Rukongai. The Second division and the stealth force it houses may be the official intelligence arm of the gotei, but every noble family runs their own network of spies and informants, and the tea houses are the Kuchiki’s points of contact. “If you have more information, leave a message for us here.” Devin nods and disappears back into the shadows. Rukia’s shoulders droop and Ichigo feels the wave of exhaustion that signals the beginning of his own adrenaline crash. He steps forward and pulls Rukia to him, her small frame fitting easily in the circle of his arms. 

“It’ll be okay,” Ichigo says, with a confidence he doesn’t feel, and he presses his lips to the crown of her head. Rukia’s hands clutch at his waist. “We’ve got each other,” Ichigo says, “he didn’t count on that last time, and he won’t this time either. We’re both stronger than we were–” 

“It’s our fault, isn’t it?” Rukia interrupts, and looks up at him. “We did this, we chose our own happiness over the safety of both our worlds. Ichigo, how could we?” 

“No,” Ichigo says, firmly, “this is not on us. We defeated him once, despite his claims that he could not be destroyed. We can do it again, and this time, we’ll end him forever.” Ichigo wonders if Rukia can tell this is all false bravado. They both nearly died last time; his bankai shattered and his power siphoned out of him until there was nothing left, and Rukia– 

Ichigo doesn’t like to think about waking up to a world encased in ice, and Rukia collapsed on the stone, her hair a white halo and her hand outstretched towards him. Yhwach was nowhere to be found. The official story is that they defeated him together, but Ichigo knew better, and Yhwach’s threat had echoed in his mind. 

Still, they dared to be happy together, and Ichigo put the voice out of his mind, consciously ignored the warning, and chose, instead, a life with Rukia, instead of a life without her. He doesn’t regret this choice, could never regret this choice, because a life with her is better than any life he could have had without her, and Yhwach had shown him several. 

There’d been lives where he’d married Inoue, settled down and had passel of children and a dog; a memorable life where he and Ishida had grown old and grey and snarky together; and lives where he’d ended up alone, watching his friends wither and age while he remained ever-youthful and the long stretch of eternity threatened to tear him apart at the seams, but never a life with Rukia, and when the vision had ended, Yhwach had answered the unasked question with a threat. 

I will return, when you are at your happiest. 

Ichigo knew then, even as he threw himself at the Quincy’s self-declared despot, that choosing the life he wanted, the one with Rukia in it, was playing with fire, but he didn’t care, and even as his blow did not land and Yhwach’s hand wrapped around his throat, Ichigo knew he would pick her, and pick their life, never mind the cost. 

Rukia slips out of his embrace, and Ichigo shakes off the pull of memory. She looks up at him. 

“I’d always have chosen you,” Ichigo says, “no matter the cost.” 

Rukia turns so she is standing in front of him. Ichigo can feel the weight of her gaze. “I know,” she says, and leans up. The kiss is brief, but laced with heat. When they break apart, Rukia rocks back on her heels. “I love you too,” she says, and together, they leap the wall, landing hand in hand.

[hajiike-archive]

Title: I need you and it terrifies me.

Words: 1,600

Summary: CangHina-centric, minor platonic KarinHina, mentioned badship AiHina, mentioned platonic MikiHina. Post TYBW arc, canon divergent. A gift for @jiiaian. WARNINGS--  implied sexual assault/relationship violence, slurs, minor violence, panic attacks. She is as empty as his gestures, yet it anchors her to him.

She insisted she came a long way over the six years since Aizen was defeated. The Wandenreich threw a wrench in her progress for a time, but her friends were okay and she had time to grieve over the last five years.

She was put together. She was okay.

She was okay, she insisted, though he kneeled and stared at her with twinkly eyes and lips parted so slightly like she was something of wonder and awe.

“I brought you these,” he said. Daisies. Girlish, juvenile, sweet. She used to adore daisies. That was a long time ago, when she wore her hair in pigtails and had the energy to stop and admire flowers. Her bones were tired those days. Forty years of a dead run only to fall into that monster’s hellscape took a lot out of her.

Daisies. Harmless, like Cang those days. He slouched, his arms were as thin as they were strong, Karin said. He hurt a lot of people but he knew he hadn’t fight left. Five years of prison must have declawed him. Cang was refreshing like that, impotent, fresh. He treat her normally while she was either fragile or trash to anyone else.

“Thank you,” she said. She took his daisies and pet the fragile petals affectionately, like she sometimes wanted to pet Cang’s cheeks. “Does she let you pick these? I don’t want you to get in trouble….”

“Fuyuno-taichou says it’s fine.”

“Alright.” It was fine for the time being.

Tulips. They’re more innocent than roses but a step away from daisies, no way around it. He wooed her and it her heart stammered in a way that made her sort of queasy.

“More flowers?” she said, her voice thankfully even. Even those days her control was feeble. Anything scrap she had over someone else was a scrap more to her. No man would have anything on her she wouldn’t let them, especially not her unchecked adoration.

Never again, she promised. Cang gave her a run for her money however.

“Yes,” said Cang, “do you like them?” He looked at her with that look again. They’re yellow like your smile. I love your smile, my heart palpitates whenever you look happy Momo-san.

His flowers couldn’t disguise the stink of gobantai. Even her outward beauty was questionable. She was grey and had crows feet and stank of tobacco and she was dirty to her core. Daisies and tulips couldn’t change that she was still dirty.

“Thank you,” she murmured. Her voice left her like her bravery, like the measly six years she tried to pull her shit together.

Cang’s fists rest upon her knees. He must prostrate himself before her, not like Karin prostrated to like the photo of Masaki kept in a corner of her barracks. Like an idol. Like an object of worship. Like an object.

“I’m glad you like it,” he said as her belly somersaulted. She doubt he could see it. Cang knew nothing about her and it wasn’t as pleasant as it used to be. “Can I bring you flowers everyday.”

She smiled though she trembled. Cang smiled too.

He brought her roses next and he may as well have kicked her.

Her mouth was dry and her gut lurched into her chest. Couldn’t he hear it slosh? Couldn’t he see how her hand shook?

The rose was red was like Tobiume’s hilt, like her favorite chemise, like her blood on Aizen’s hand.

“I-I didn’t eat today,” she told Cang. Ever a pleaser, she was full of excuses.

“Shall I fetch you something? Karin tells me you keep the break room stocked.”

“N-no…” no. No. No, she wouldn’t be able to swallow, she felt so sick. She’d just cough it up, she’d choke on it. Cang would slap her back until she gulped air with tears down her cheeks and act like a fucking hero even though he was the one who did it to her. He was enamored like she was some priceless relic on a pedestal.

He was a man. They were good at being ignorant.

“Alright then,” he said. She wanted him to leave but her mouth couldn’t move. “Do you like roses, Momo-san?”

“I don’t care much for flowers…” she confessed.

“Oh.” Cang’s lips fell. He was hard to read sometimes, always stone-faced. When he did express something it felt like another knife in her ribs.

“I’m… I’m sorry,” she said. “I’m very busy, Cang, can you leave me now?”

His head bowed apologetically. “Of course,” he said. “I apologize for badgering you, Momo-san.” Cang stood, finally, and he left.

She dropped the rose in the trash. It made her taste copper like her last heartbreak.

“I don’t have flowers today.” Thunder rumbled somewhere in the distance. Cang was soaked, his hair and his cloak caked to his frame.

“Lord, you look like a wet dog. Did you walk here, you fool?” she said. “Come inside, Cang. Take off your shoes and your cloak, I don’t want you tracking water everywhere. I’ll be back with some towels.”

“Thank you….”

She did. Karin’s eyes followed her as she returned with a pile of terry cloth in her arms. Cang held a book close to his chest as she scrubbed his hair. The sickness returned and yet her arms refused to stop drying him off.

“You should’ve stayed home,” she scolded him.

“I-I’m sorry. Karin says you’re off on Saturdays and… easily subject to boredom.”

“I wouldn’t say that. I’m knitting my brother a sweater so I’m occupied.”

“Am I intruding?”

Yes. “No,” she replied. She hated herself. “Come. I’ll put on something warm for you.”

Karin leapt onto the bean bag from the couch before Cang reached it. Funny little creature. Smoked like she did and still had the energy to hop around like a frog. She almost envied Karin.

“Fuyuno-taichou loaned me this poetry book she has,” Cang told her. “She tells me you like poetry. I am not a poet so much of it… um… I’m afraid I can’t understand much of it, but there are a few passages that remind me of you. I would like to read those to you.”

“Oh god, I’m gonna go before this gets corny. I’m gonna use your room, Momo,” Karin said.

Like that, her heart seized and she was left to listen to his driveling love bullshit.

She grasped the counter as she listened. Her ears rang like she caught Cang’s right hook instead of some sugary poetry he sat down and jerked off to. Streams trickled off her chin and sizzled on the stovetop, the kettle rattled like her knees but she could only seem to hear the high-pitched ring. Breathless, like he stabbed her again and again.

“Momo-san!” Cang reached around her and flipped off the stove. The kettle quieted, though it shook with the rolling boil, and Cang turned her around.

“Don’t touch me!” she shrieked. Her palm clapped across Cang’s cheek and he stumbled back. “Don’t pretend fucking love me, you’re full of shit!” Karin emerged from her room with some sort of curse. Cang was escorted out by his shoulder and she braced herself on the countertop, gasping like she narrowly avoided drowning. Her heart roared in her chest. She swore it would collapse any second---

Karin wrapped around her from behind. They sunk to their knees, her forehead on the cabinets, and she wept. She was supposed to be a fucking adult, she was supposed to be there for Karin, not vise versa.

“I’ll answer the door if he comes back,” Karin said.

She nodded. Her mouth was agape, she tasted salt, and she whined. “Please,” she begged. “I can’t breathe when he’s in the room.”

He came back. Karin, true to word, went for the door while she escaped to her room.

“She’s not here,” Karin said. The youth’s voice carried unlike Cang’s. “Oh, you dumb shit, do I look like her babysitter? She’s a grown-ass woman. If she wants to go out, she doesn’t need your fucking permission.”

Karin was cruel in a lot of ways. It was much of a relief as it broke her heart.

“Yeeep. See you in the morning, Caaang,” Karin sang.

She had no idea how she ended up out of her room, but she shoved her charge aside and tumbled into the engawa.

“Cang!”

He spun and he met her back at her door.

“I’m sorry.” She’d cry again if he got in a word. “About that and the other day. I… I shouldn’t have panicked like I had and I apologize for that and for striking you.”

Cang, stunned, merely stared at her. There was a blush-pink dahlia wrapped in paper machete in his hand. “Momo-san…. You have nothing to apologize for. I understand my actions were easily misconstrued as… as coming on to you. I came here to apologize for scaring you and to promise I will behave more conscientiously in the future.”

How eloquent, fanciful. How blatantly scripted.

It was more than she had in the past. She cried afresh.

Cang held the dahlia to her. “I’m sorry I made you cry again. I know you do not like flowers, unfortunately they are all I have. I am clumsy and I don’t have the words to express how I appreciate your forgivingness.”

She smiled again and brought the dahlia to her nose to smell it. It was as sugary as the poetry. It was like another knife. But she was needy. However it hurt and nauseated her, she knew she-- a whore-- wouldn’t get anything elsewhere.