#seeing as they are pretty much the only characters that were described SEVERAL TIMES as being super handsome by the narration

[neon-ufo]

Pridak 🦈

[cool-island-songs]

Analysis of ALNST Character Relationship Metrics

My art book won't be here for a minute, but I ran some screenshots I saw on twt through an image translator and have a lot of thoughts:

TILL: Despite claiming to hate everyone in the world, Till ranks Ivan at 70% intimacy even as he identifies perturbing behaviors of Ivan's going back years and refers to him as "a bother". He also ranks Sua at 10% in spite of having little to say about her and finding it uncomfortable to be around her.

Though he postures at being misanthropic and has all the manners you'd expect of a boy who was half off at the human child pound, he's actually quite gentle and sensitive. This is reflected in one of the graduation messages he's left by a classmate as well:

The person he feels closest to is an unattainable crush, and someone who doesn't feel that close with him in return, likely because he's too shy to really approach her or carry on a conversation.

MIZI: That's Mizi, of course, who's rather childlike and naive initially. She likes everyone, but since Till chokes when he tries to speak to her and often keeps his distance, she wonders if he's avoiding her because he dislikes her.

Mizi gravitates towards people who she sees as "perfect", which is how she describes Ivan and Sua in her graduation message to Ivan:

She doesn't see the darker side of Ivan's personality (which has been described on several occasions, even by himself, as "twisted") because he's attractive, successful, and helpful to her.

Though she likes everyone, Sua is her "God", and the only thing that can keep them apart is the tragedy of their situation, which forces Mizi to grow up in a brutally painful way.

SUA: Sua is far less idealistic and naive than Mizi, and has clearly thought about sacrificing herself to save Mizi, since Ivan picks on her for thinking of doing so in an official comic. Accordingly, her feelings about Mizi are far more tinged by the knowledge that they will one day be torn apart by external circumstances. She laments that reciprocating her feelings will one day cause Mizi great pain.

She's always been more somber, and despite her surface similarities to Ivan (which he notes in a follow-up comic wherein he realizes he was wrong about Sua's feelings for Mizi being unrequited), she's quite different on the inside. Sua's more sensitive and thus her colder exterior serves to protect her, whereas Ivan's outward persona creates an illusion of normalcy that doesn't reflect his reality.

Sua views Ivan and Till as a threat and a nuisance, respectively. Like Till, she senses something strange about Ivan, and when it comes to Till, it's just one person too many around for her. This is fascinating to me, because I thought she might pity Till! Her feelings about Ivan were already pretty clear from this panel of the 'piggyback' comic, and she seems deeply hurt in the first comic linked by his prodding.

IVAN: For his part, Ivan is fascinated by Till even though he's content to sit back and observe, pestering him to get a reaction or his attention for a brief time. He doesn't expect anything in return but wants more than anything to be on Till's mind (hence behaviors like stealing Till's belongings and returning them to him, pretending he had found them).

He prefers Sua to Mizi despite his awareness that Sua doesn't particularly like him, seeing her as a sister and even telling her she's "twisted" like he is. He likes Mizi well enough, especially her sincerity, but seems to find her optimism a bit much at times.

The fact that Mizi and the others would likely consider Ivan and Mizi quite close while Ivan does not reflects how much he postures even in his closest relationships. He struggles to connect with those he's most compelled by and it's not clear if he really wants to.

Some Ivantill thoughts before I go:

There seems to be a common sentiment that it's tragic Till was unable to see how much Ivan loved him, and I think we'll likely get more of Till's perspective on Ivan and their relationship in round 7. But it may not be the case that Ivan even wanted his true feelings to be seen, or would have known what to do if Till had reciprocated them.

There's something almost voyeuristic and self-negating in his feelings for Till (see: "I can’t reach you, so I imagine alone/You who shines, I stand next to you" from 'Black Sorrow'). He has far more self-awareness and willingness to accept things as they are than Till, who doesn't see that Mizi only has eyes for Sua and who would likely struggle to accept that reality.

Ivan, on the other hand, is well aware that his feelings for Till are "shallow", a bright fantasy to get him through his dark reality, and he seems to sincerely believe that his death won't scar Till because he's never really broken through to him. He's a schemer, and comments he makes in his graduation message to Till and the interview he gives in advance of round 6 suggest that he may have been planning to sacrifice himself for some time.

Part of me wonders if he hoped it would leave a mark on Till. Choking, kissing, and violently sacrificing oneself are all aggressive, forward acts, especially from someone who used to toy with people to get his kicks but was otherwise quite passive and unfeeling.

There are a lot of parallels in the one-sided loves, like Till acting out of his usual character for Mizi, and Ivan doing the same because of Till, putting all hopes of being saved in something just out of reach, staying in chains for that one special person. But Ivan's psychology is quite different from Till's, and in fact closest to Luka's re: low or no empathy. Both Ivan and Till are significantly traumatized by their upbringings but Ivan's difficult early life in the slums and his experience being dangled off that rooftop seem to have damaged his ability to connect to others or feel much of anything.

Till is the first person for whom he feels anything while for Till, Mizi is an early crush he puts on a pedestal in a much more commonplace way. I think the shared trauma of competing on that stage makes it much more difficult for either of them to imagine moving on, but Ivan is not wrong in identifying that he won't find that feeling again.

The thing that intrigues me most about this series is the way the contestants' differences play out, particularly with regard to how they view love and how they respond to their individual and shared challenges. I'd love to get into it further another time but this is quite long already so thanks for sticking with it if any have (haha)

[juniperskye]

Without You

Sneak Peek: Aaron and you have been dating for over a year now…the thing is, the BAU team has no idea. When Aaron does something reckless that could cost him his life, will you expose the relationship you have worked so hard to keep under wraps?

Aaron Hotchner x BAU Fem Reader

Angst/Fluff

Word count: 2371

Warnings: One use of y/n, age gap, mentions of anxiety/anxiety attack, some language, canon typical violence, mentions of death, explosion, BAU case details (similar to those of s7e23), severe emotional pain, mentions of Haley’s death, mention of Jack, secret relationship, JJ is still the media liaison (it just fit better for the plot) if I missed any – let me know!

Not edited - please be kind.

I do not consent to having my work translated or reposted to any other site. That being said I do not own the characters portrayed in this story.

Aaron Hotchner had very quickly become your best friend. Your friendship had come so naturally, despite a pretty significant age gap. After two years of what could only be described as painfully obvious yearning from both parties, Aaron finally gained the courage to ask you to dinner. Even though it took two weeks before you could actually act on that invitation, the date had gone better than expected. Aaron had been a perfect gentleman; bringing you flowers, opening your door, holding your hand, paying for your meal, actually listening when you spoke.

That’s why it had been so easy to fall in love with him. Things with Aaron truly had been effortless, falling into a comfortable routine in which you would drive to his place after work, relieve the babysitter, get Jack started on homework while you got dinner going. Since meeting Jack, back before you’d even begun dating Aaron, you were one of his favorite people. You had spoiled Jack since you’d met the boy, he was just so sweet, and he’d reminded you of your nephews…it was easy to spend time with him. Aaron would come home to Jack helping set the table and you plating up the food. He’d wrap you up in an embrace and the three of you would sit and enjoy your meal while discussing how your days went (mostly Jack talking about school).

The one thing in your relationship that had not been effortless was keeping it a secret from your team. There had already been much speculation as to whether or not Aaron and you had feelings for one another amongst the agents. Dave was the one who pestered Aaron the most, constantly encouraging him to take a chance on love, that it wouldn’t always end like it had with Haley. In your case it had been Penelope, she and you had grown close over your time at the BAU, and she could see the tell-tale signs of a blossoming crush for your superior.

The two of you hadn’t initially planned to hide your relationship, but after many late-night conversations about it and a lengthy pros and cons list, you had determined, for the time being, keeping things quiet was the best option. That was nearly eleven months ago. You and Aaron had been together for about a year and a half, living together for four months…things had not been easy. You guys had to work hard to keep your feelings at bay on tough missions. There had been an instance of you getting stabbed by an unsub, thankfully the wound was superficial, and you were fine, but it had taken everything in Aaron not to run to you and take you into his arms. That was one of many hardships you had faced, but none of those would have prepared you for today.

A call had come in to the BAU at 9:53 am. The call rang to Aaron’s direct line, which meant it was a time sensitive case, usually a child abduction or in this case, a hostage situation. Aaron came out of his office swiftly, calling everyone’s attention without even speaking.

“There is a hostage situation at First Union bank. We’ve been called in by Virgina PD, who is already on the scene and SWAT is currently on their way as well. Everyone needs to gather their things and head to the garage” Aaron gave his orders, and everyone sprang into action.

As you all made your way to the government issued SUVs, Aaron continued briefing everyone and he gave out assignments.

“Alright Garcia and Reid, I want you two in the mobile command unit digging into our unsubs, we need to identify them. JJ, I need you to control the media with this, I don’t want any details getting out without my approval. Morgan and Prentiss go check in with SWAT and go over our plan. Y/N and Dave you will take point on the negotiations. Understood?” Aaron looked to everyone for confirmation.

There were collective nods, and everyone went to their separate posts to get started. You and Dave made your way over to one of the command center tents, discussing with the officers there that you would be in charge of the negotiations. They filled you in on what had happened thus far, and you worked to devise your initial approach. Dave and you had made contact with the unsubs, they were demanding a helicopter and one million dollars (a truly ridiculous request on their part). Approximately fifteen minutes later, Garcia and Reid rushed to where you, Dave and Aaron were standing.

“We have identified the unsubs! The two men are brothers, Michael and James Snyder. They are connected to at least eight other bank robberies around the northeastern United Staes. The woman, her name is Katiya Kuznetsov she is not connected to the robberies, but she is flagged under the FBI’s most wanted. She’s thought to be the mastermind behind dozens of explosions in North America from the last nine months.” Garcia explained. Aaron radioed to request the bomb squad.

“Why would she be working with these two? Robbing banks isn’t quite the same M.O. as blowing up buildings.” You questioned.

“We looked into it, and it seems that she may have connections to someone who owns a safety deposit box at this bank. We don’t know what is in it, but we were able to narrow down the list of potentials.” Reid answered.

“This changes things, we need to get in there and apprehend them. We need to get the civilians out. I think our best option would be for us to breach with SWAT and local PD.” Aaron explained.

“Hotch, that seems a little drastic don’t you think? If we just barge in there, who’s to say they don’t just start shooting the hostages. Dave and I were making progress and now that we know who they are, perhaps we can get them to break.” You could feel your anxiety eating away at you, the thought of Aaron barging in there terrified you.

“Sorry kid, but I’m with Aaron on this one. We were making some progress, but not enough and given this new information, I think it is safe to assume that there is probably a bomb in the bank somewhere, the sooner we get the hostages out, the better.” Rossi shut your idea down.

You could feel the bile rising up your throat. Your palms were starting to sweat and your pulse quickening. You knew what was about to happen, Aaron was going to give out assignments which meant he was diving headfirst into danger while he ensured your safety.

“Alright here’s what we will do, Morgan and I will go in the front, try to talk the unsubs down. Prentiss and Reid you will go through the back, with SWAT and the bomb squad try to locate the explosive and disable it. Garcia, I want you to keep eyes inside the bank the whole time, keep us posted of everything you see through comms. Dave and you can stay out here and monitor the phones, I want you to call in to distract them while we enter, I think it might buy us some leeway.” Aaron gave the assignments.

You gave Aaron a pointed look, one that expressed all of your nerves and anxiety. He looked back at you, it was stern as far as any onlooker could tell, but you could see the softness flash across his features. He was silently telling you that everything would be okay, and for a moment, you believed that it would be.

Time seemed to slow then. Everyone was moving, following orders hastily. But you, you were glued to your spot…Dave’s hand on your shoulder is what finally snapped you out of your thoughts.

“He’ll be okay kid.” Dave tried to soothe your nerves.

You called into the bank to try and steal the attention of the unsubs as Aaron had requested, all the while agents were moving through the bank. Suddenly Garcia’s voice rang over the comms.

“One of the unsubs slipped away. I’m assuming to get to the explosive. I am working to get the blueprints of the bank so we can figure out where it is set up.” Garcia rushed.

Gunshots echoed through the air, the comms were buzzing with shouts from Aaron, Morgan, Prentiss, Dave and some other voices you couldn’t pin down.

The fact that you could hear Aaron’s voice helped to calm your nerves as he clearly hadn’t been shot. His next words soothed your mind even more so.

“We have Michael and James in custody, Morgan is walking the hostages out now. I am going to go and assist the others in finding Katiya and the explosive.” Aaron called over the comms.

Dave could see you tense at Aaron’s words; he once again laid his hand on your shoulder in hopes to ease your mind. Morgan walked over to you and Dave after placing the unsubs in the police cars that were standing by.

What happened next brought your world crashing down.

The silence over the comms had been eerie. Everything paused and then it happened. The bank had exploded, right before your eyes. You had been far enough away that the blast hadn’t knocked you over, but it still left your ears ringing.

Had Morgan and Dave’s ears not already been ringing they definitely would have been after the scream that ripped through your body.

“NOO!!!!!” You screamed.

You couldn’t form a coherent thought; you sobbed and lurched your body forward in hopes of going to find Aaron. Before you could make it three steps, Morgan had his arms around your waist holding you back. He turned you around and held you while you pounded your fists against his chest.

“Sweetheart you can’t go in there. I know we have people in there and waiting for them to get out is going to feel like an eternity. But until we get any sort of confirmation, we need to try and stay positive.” Morgan explained.

Garcia and JJ joined you, Dave and Morgan, tears streaming down their faces, all of them silently hoping your team family would make it out unscathed.

You could feel it coming on, the more time had passed. Your breaths were shallow, body clammy, your vision was going blurry, you were having a hard time keeping yourself upright. Dave was the one to notice and lead you away from the group, he held your hands and was saying something about you needing to match his breathing.

“Dave I…I c-can’t. W-what if he doesn’t make it out? I w-would d-die without him Dave!” You hiccupped.

“He’s going to make it out. But remember that you are strong and no matter what happens you will make it through this.” Dave reminds you.

“No! Dave, you don’t understand without Aaron, sure, the rain would fall, the children would play, the tides would change but I-I would die.” You looked away from Dave momentarily “I die without you.” You whispered.

You saw heads start turning in the direction of the alleyway that was adjacent to what was once the bank, as you followed suit, the bile returned – easing its way up your throat.  A body bag, with no other signs of Aaron. Your mind jumped to the worst-case scenario and your legs finally gave out. Dave tried to catch you as you fell to the ground, another gut-wrenching sob ripping its way through you.

You didn’t register the loss of Dave’s arms around your shoulders, not until he moved to pull you up off the ground and turn you in the direction of the group of agents making their way towards you. You tried to protest, telling Dave that nothing mattered anymore, until he physically turned your chin towards them.

“Aaron?” It came out as an exhale, below a whisper.

“Aaron?” This time was a bit louder, gaining your voice back.

“Aaron!” A shout this time as you could see his eyes scanning the crowd for you.

His gaze snapped to you as you ran towards him, looking him over to ensure that he is unharmed before you launch yourself into his arms. He lifted you fully and allowed you to wrap your legs around his waist, he could feel your tears soaking the collar of his shirt. He gently shushed you assuring you that he was okay and that everyone was safe.

“T-the b-body bag, I-I thought it. I thought it was you, Aaron.”

“It was Katiya, she was trying to detonate it when we found her, we had just enough time to get to some sort of vault, but when it went off, the debris trapped us in. Honey, I am so sorry I scared you. I’m alright though, not even a scratch.” Aaron brushed his hand over the back of your head as you brought your feet back to the ground.

He looked into your eyes, he could tell that your brain was trying to process everything, all the emotions you had just been feeling, along with the relief you must be feeling now. He couldn’t help himself when he leaned in and kissed you. It was a kiss that said I was terrified of losing you but we’re safe and here together now. As he pulled away, you rested your foreheads against one another’s.

You knew that there would be tons of questions from the team but honestly in this moment you couldn’t care less because Aaron was safe and back in your arms. This moment that you were sharing allowed a few things to become clear for you and Aaron. You knew that he was the one for you, nobody else, and you were sure you wouldn’t survive losing him. He came to realize that it was time for him to pull that ring from the back of his sock drawer and finally ask you for forever, he thought that maybe it was time for him to step back and take that promotion Strauss had continuously offered. All he knew was that he couldn’t risk what you two had. Without you…he couldn’t even finish the thought because that wasn’t even an option.

[dunmeshistash]

What do you think about Shuro? And more specifically his relationship with Laios, and idk if you talk about ships but what are your thoughts on laishuro

I have this headcannon that Laios has some sort of unrequited crush on Shuro just because it's sorta funny

I ship pretty much everything. Like, as default I think everyone should kiss everyone 👍

If I'm honest I'm not much of a Shuro fan, he's a little boring to me and reactions to the chimera episode made me dislike him a bit lmao.

Ignoring the fandom I like him as a character and I LOVE his fight with Laios. Shuro's relationship to Laios is my favorite part of that character so laishuro pretty much saves him for me.

In universe Shuro is said to be quite the introvert even for people from his country. He's not the standard for someone from the eastern archipelago and it bothered me a bit when people used that to justify how he wasn't honest to Laios. I understand the idea that he comes from somewhere where reading social cues is not only expected but required but he's also someone who avoids confrontation and is quiet/shy in general.

Here's a bit from Maizuru's description from the adventurer's bible

"People tend to describe Shuro as "drab" and "shy" (...)" so specifically HE IS the exact type of person who would cause the biggest misunderstanding with Laios, just compare him to how his retainers or even his father and brothers act.

It took them saying they used ancient magic on Falin/seeing chimera Falin for him to finally snap, everything else he decided to just take it cause he thought it was better to take it than to confront Laios directly.

So besides the cultural differences you have to take into consideration this was pretty much the perfect storm brewing for that confrontation, and it's as much who Shuro is as a person and who Laios is as person that caused it.

I also disagree that the fight was a "they're both in the wrong" situation. Don't get me wrong, Laios was VERY culturally insensitive to Shuro and even more insensitive to his feelings, but there was nothing he could have done differently with the information that was available to him.

Specifically I see this comic being used to justify how Laios was to blame too, making Shuro into the victim

Like that's a major white guy move but he DIDN'T HEAR Shuro's name and Shuro never corrected him. I'd understand it if his reaction was "Your name is too complicated so I'll call you Shuro instead" that would be a major dick move, but Laios did not hear his name because Toshiro mumbled it, and for someone that forgot Kabru's name several times I imagine he made an effort to remember Shuro's.

Laios never met someone from the eastern archipelago before this, nobody ever explained to him he wasn't acting in an appropriate manner and most of all he thought they were friends. He trusted Shuro to set boundaries for him, he always respects boundaries that are set even when he doesn't fully understand them (Recalling the "I forgot about feelings.." when Chilchuck says it feels wrong to eat merman)

Instead of explaining ANYTHING to Laios, Shuro instead held it all in until it exploded all at once, he blamed Laios for not knowing something he couldn't know, and accused him of not being serious about saving his own sister.

Just imagine how this must have felt for Laios, everyone is always underestimating how serious he is, everyone accuses him of being stupid, clueless, and now this guy is telling him he isn't serious about saving the person he loves the most in the world and wants to protect always. To me this wasn't a "they're both in the wrong" situation, Shuro is far more in the wrong than Laios. But that's just how I see it.

That all being said, they understood each other finally and made peace after that fight.

And several times after this we see that Shuro really cares for Laios, and Laios still wants to be his friend. He even offered to save Laios if he fails (and he's sure he's gonna fail). So their relationship is dear to me, especially cause after this they finally have the foundation for a true mutual friendship <3

I think my dislike of Shuro comes from relating to him to be honest, it happens often that I see my own failures on a character and get angry at them for being angry at myself lmao. I also got a little annoyed cause I only saw people defending him, apparently those were made as a response to hate he had gotten? But since I never actually seen the hate it just felt annoying to see Shuro being white knighted.

Anyway I love the two of them together and I'm really happy they finally understood each other better. laishuro might be my favorite Laios ship, one sided crushes are great.

[bcacstuff]

The clock may be ticking for Outlander on TV, but the story is everlasting for bestselling author Diana Gabaldon, who writes the historical fantasy books (nine and counting!) upon which the show is based. Debuting in 1991, the first Outlander novel has spawned several sequels, spinoff novellas, and ultimately the intense Starz drama that viewers have come to love. With the final episodes on the horizon and new prequel series Blood of My Blood forthcoming, Gabaldon reflects on the show’s end and offers a peek inside her notebook.

What have you been happy to see so far in Season 7?

Diana Gabaldon: One of the things the Outlander production as a whole does really well is battle scenes. We’ve had a certain amount of the [American Revolution’s] Battle of Ticonderoga, the first Battle of Saratoga, and a lot of the second Battle of Saratoga. And I absolutely loved the actor playing Benedict Arnold, Rod Hallett. The casting this season has been spectacular. Every character is just right.

Would you say that Benedict Arnold was the character you were most excited for fans to meet this season?

He is historically fascinating, and I did a lot of research work on him because he plays a large part in more than one of the books. And we’ll see him again in Book 10. His story is very interesting. Everybody knows how his story ends, or at least they think they do. But yes, I was just impressed that, between the script and the actor, they pretty much nailed him and captured his sense of reckless adventure and his charm. Luckily, they used a lot of the book dialogue for it, some of which was taken from things that Benedict Arnold himself said.

With the show set to conclude with Season 8, do you have an ending in mind for Claire and Jamie’s story on the page?

Yes, I have shared the ending scenes with [the creative team]. But as to the actual way the story comes to a conclusion? No, they don’t know that. [Laughs] But we’ll get there. I don’t write in a straight line, and I don’t work with an outline. This is why it takes me several years to write one book — not only the way that I write, which I describe as like playing Tetris in my head, but also just the sheer size and the fact that they are books of a continuing nature.

You’ve shared a few excerpts from your 10th novel in the series. Is there anything else you can tease about it?

Well, I’m still writing it. And I have a title, but I’m not revealing that until we’re a bit closer to publication. I don’t want to rub all the “new” off it. I can tell you that it’s got whales.

You’ve also written Season 2’s “Vengeance Is Mine,” “Journeycake” in Season 5, and the upcoming 14th installment in Season 7. Can we anticipate more scripts from you?

Yeah, it’s so much easier than writing novels. [Laughs] It takes me three weeks tops to write a scene. I will be writing a script for the prequel [Blood of My Blood] and one for Season 8 [of Outlander].

Though only one season has been given the green light, how long do you envision the prequel’s story to be onscreen?

Well, the television version isn’t up to me, but for what it’s worth, I have material for three —  relatively short, as compared to the main Outlander novels — prequel books concerning Jamie’s parents. Blood of My Blood is based on the synopsis of the first of those books.

Apart from the ones you’ve written, are there any episodes you love so much that you wish you had?

Oh, yeah. There’s always at least one per season where I’m thinking, “Oh, this is fabulous.” It would be [Episode 8, “Turning Points”] for Season 7.

Do you have a favorite memory from your times visiting the set?

It would probably be the first season where they invited me to do a cameo [as Iona MacTavish] in Episode 4. It was fascinating being part of the set rather than visiting it. I was a cast member for three days. It was just interesting to see how it all worked.

Were you able to make it to set for Season 8?

God willing, I will be on set for a week or so next month [September 2024]. They’ll be filming the final block, for which I wrote one of the scripts, so I’d like to see a bit of it live. The last time I was on set for a prolonged period — as opposed to drop-in visits — was for Season 2’s “Vengeance Is Mine.” The food from craft services was always excellent, so I’m hoping to have a toastie, and I’m looking forward to seeing good friends.

How have the main cast’s performances surpassed what you envisioned on the page?

Sam Heughan does a fantastic job with Jamie, and Caitríona [Balfe], while she doesn’t look like the Claire of the books, certainly acts like her and is totally immersive in her character. I’ve [never] seen a bad performance by anyone at any level.

What will you miss most about the show?

I’ll miss the entertainment value of seeing dailies five nights a week, but otherwise, I’m not troubled. The end of a great adventure is always a bit traumatic and nostalgic — but it does leave you with a feeling of specialness, accomplishment, of having been part of a great endeavor. And they do live in my head, you know…

Are there more stories in this universe that you still wish to explore?

There’s always more I could write. Making the optimistic assumption that I’m going to live long enough, I have notes for [time traveler] Master Ray-Mond’s book (no title on that one yet) and for another [about Claire’s first husband, Frank], titled What Frank Knew.

Will you feel sad saying goodbye to Jamie and Claire?

I really don’t think I will — the main books are written with a lot of lacunae — spaces where we move from one block of story to another, leaving a hiatus of months (or sometimes years) in someone’s life. I can, should I want to, always go back to one of those places and write what happened while everyone was looking somewhere else.

Outlander, Season 7B, Fridays, 8/7c, Starz (Midnight on the Starz App and On Demand)

This is an excerpt from TV Guide Magazine’s Outlander: Claire & Jamie’s Love Story For The Ages issue. For a deep-dive into the historical romance, scoop on the second half of Season 7, and details on the upcoming prequel, pick up a copy of the issue available on newsstands and for order online at Outlander2024.com.

Article posted 29 November 2024

[callmelittlesunshinefics]

Hello, Little Girl (Part One)

Logan Howlett (Wolverine) x Reader

Summary: You have been living at Xavier's school for a few years now, feeling slightly out of place as a Nephilim from another universe but welcome nonetheless. When something pops up that has no business being in this universe you're sent gearing up for a mission that you would rather leave the X-Men out of, but an anxious endless and overprotective step-uncle-devil insist on this being worked as a team.

A/N: The title is an Into the Woods reference for no good reason other than that I couldn't help myself. We're also loosely using X2 Logan purely because of the kitchen scene, but in reality it's an AU.

Some quick background, the reader (Y/N in fic, described with she/her pronouns) is based off of an OC I tend to pull out pretty frequently. Half human, half angel, displaced from their home universe and dropped into this one, with characters from Lucifer (show/comics) and The Sandman (show/comics) making appearances despite not existing in the Marvel Universe. *shrug* TW: Alcohol use, swearing, mature/explicit themes down the line in subsequent chapters so MDNI

Feedback/questions/comments HUGELY appreciated as it took me a long ass time to say f it and post this <3

Pairing: Logan Howlett x Reader

Word Count: 3,437

It was late when you arrived, but that was part of your plan. You didn’t want too much of a fuss and had plenty of groceries to put away, everyone made a big fuss out of missing your cooking when you announced your departure, so you were sure to come back with all the essentials you knew you’d be asked to make in the coming days. It was late to start cooking, even by your standards, but the silence in the house was so deep that you were certain starting some baked goods wouldn’t be the cause of any commotion. You got to work with plenty of butter, flour, sugar, and eggs on hand. All of the basics you would need to make as many things as possible. 

You got started on big batches of basics; chocolate chip cookies, brownies, dough for cinnamon rolls to serve tomorrow morning. You had several bowls in various stages of prep when you fell silent, realizing you were no longer alone. 

“If I had known you were here I swear I wouldn’t have started,” you turned, explaining yourself to the only person it could be, “You’re the only one who could’ve heard any of this from three floors away.” 

Logan shook his head in the negative and unlocked the fridge that stored alcohol for the adults of the mansion, grabbing two beers. He held one out to you that you accepted, and he took a large sip of his before explaining. 

“I was up as soon as you landed in the kitchen,” he referenced your unique method of travel, shrugging, “You might be flying too fast to see, but I heard you.” 

You smirked, “Yet you waited until the cookie dough was just about ready…” 

He shrugged, “Figured you’d be so happy to see your favorite in the house you’d be more likely to sneak me some extra.” 

“Were you even asleep?” You cut through the bullshit, and Logan chuckled, “And so confident you’re my favorite?” You teased, “What if it’s Scott?” 

He actually growled and wasn’t ashamed of it, “Don’t say things just to wound me, darlin’.” 

You chuckled to yourself but relented, sharing the cookie dough with the wolverine with an extra spoon you pulled from the drawer as soon as you realized who was snooping. You took a long sip of the beer and hummed, relenting without much of a fight. 

“How many are still here?” He knew what you meant without clarification. 

“Not many, but they’re all older so no one complains about these,” He gestured to the beers between the two of you, “But all of this will be gone by tomorrow.” He meant all of your baked goods and you shrugged. 

“That’s what they’re for, Old Man.” He glared at you, shoveling more cookie dough out of the bowl.

“How long are we going to do this little dance?” He asked looking you dead in the eye. It took a lot to throw you off balance, but Logan was better at doing it than most. 

“Is it your hip? Need a seat, grandpa?” They were coming out half-hearted even to you, and he leveled you with a look to tell you as much as he continued to wait, “Alright look, I’ll admit those weren’t my best, but if you don’t want to keep up the dance how about you just ask me whatever it is you want to know?” 

Logan looked genuinely surprised and you snorted, getting back to work you started to roll out dough that had finished resting for the cinnamon rolls. Logan sat down to watch, sipping his beer and enjoying your company while he worked out how to ask you everything he was thinking without scaring you off. 

He sighed, “When you left you said you couldn’t tell us much, and I understand needing to leave the past in the past better than most.” 

You waited for him to continue as you spread the filling across the dough. There were long silences sometimes between the two of you, but they never felt awkward. Logan didn’t have the gift of gab, but you weren’t in any rush. You learned early on that it was best to give him his time, but you also realized equally early that sometimes Logan sitting down and trying to talk about his feelings was like trying to recite a poem he’s never heard in a language he doesn’t speak.

“If I’m being totally honest, and I will be since it seems like that’s what you’re getting at, I don’t really know if I fixed anything or if I just…” You trailed off and Logan nodded, scooping up more cookie dough. This was the point you realized Logan really wasn’t leaving without more answers from you, any other day and that cookie dough would be a fond memory by now. 

“If they’re sending you for intel it must be pretty bad, huh?”

You finally got a genuine laugh out of him, “No one sent me, bub. The reason I waited for this to be ready first,” he gestured to his snack, “Is because I could smell the stress on you miles away. Whatever sent you runnin off hasn’t let you alone since, matter of time before you accept the fact you need help.” 

You squinted, “Can you actually smell stress or is that an exaggeration?” It may have sounded like a joke but you were genuinely curious and he knew, deciding to humor you. 

“More complicated than I made it sound, but bottom line is yes, bub. Is it my turn to ask a question?” He threw you a signature smirk as you both nursed your drinks, cinnamon rolls temporarily abandoned. You took a deep breath. 

“You’re no stranger to the fact that there are other worlds out there, some like the ones I came from, some much closer than that within this universe.” Logan sobered up quickly, sitting up straighter. He thought it would take more prodding, he didn’t expect you to casually toss him into the deep end. “Does the name Morepheus mean anything to you?” 

Logan shook his head in the negative and you nodded, but he interrupted before you could continue, “Do you want me to wake the professor?” 

You smiled sadly, “I’m going to tell him everything too. But is it alright if I just tell you first, we’ll consider it a first draft. I really have no clue how I’m going to explain this to-” 

“I’m gonna get us some proper drinks, don’t get too ahead of yourself kiddo.” You rolled your eyes and took the break as an opportunity to finish spreading the filling and roll up the cinnamon rolls to rest ahead of slicing and baking. 

Opening up to Logan first thing upon your arrival wasn’t on your bingo card for how your return was going to go, but it wasn’t unwelcome either. Your friendship with Logan was an easy one, but you couldn’t pretend it didn’t get strained in your absence. He knew you weren’t a mutant and that some part of you felt you didn’t belong at the school, didn’t deserve it, but he would be the first to remind you that didn’t matter. Of course, you weren’t fully human either, so what that made you to the team was always a question mark in your own mind. 

Logan returned and began covering your many bowls before you had a chance to tell him what went where, “I take it you’re forcing me into a break?” 

“And some sleep if I’m lucky.” He meant it as a joke but regretted it as soon as he saw your face fall, “But for now moving us into the study with the whiskey.” 

You got the kitchen mostly in a state of order before heading down the hallway to meet Logan by the fire, plate of brownies in hand. If you weren’t painfully aware of the bad news you were about to deliver, it might even feel romantic, huddled near the fire with chocolate and alcohol. You kicked your shoes off and collapsed onto the small couch beside Logan, enough space between the two of you to feel intimate without being crowded. You closed your eyes and leaned backwards into the plush cushions of the couch, taking a deep breath as you tried to pinpoint the start. 

“Now hon the first thing you need to understand is that nothing sent me off running. It may have seemed abrupt to everyone here, except the professor that is, but I was gone the second my head hit the pillow that night. I shut my eyes here and opened them in another world.” You took a deep breath as Logan stared back at you looking like he wasn’t entirely certain if you had completely lost it or were telling him something of dire importance. Once the shock wore off and he remembered who he was speaking to, a nephilim from another universe, he decided if you told him you were pulled into another world, he had no reason to doubt it as fact.

“Do you know where you were?” 

You nodded and pointed to your empty glasses, “It’s not like you to be stingey with the liquor, ever plan on helping a girl out?” 

He rolled his eyes but eagerly poured you both what looked to be maker’s mark. Not your favorite but for the conversation ahead anything would do. You weren’t a lightweight, but you couldn’t be called a drinker either, so you surprised yourself and Logan when you downed the double shot he poured before refilling your own glass and topping off his. You expected a snarky joke or more disapproval of your behavior, but instead the Wolverine just continued to watch you as if he were studying for a test he wasn’t entirely prepared for. 

You didn’t need his heightened senses to see that your behavior was putting him on edge, and you quietly admired this as one of his most underrated abilities. He might not know what you were about to tell him, but his instincts knew before you said the words that you were gearing up for a fight. 

“Have you ever heard of the Endless?” You asked Logan and he slowly shook his head no, “I didn’t think so, at this point most people think of them as myths. Stories that got lost to time and all that. But my Uncle Lu had a few run ins with the family, not all of them good, but you know how he could be…” You wandered off for a bit and Logan felt a chill, as much as he would try to deny it. You mentioned him so casually, your “Uncle Lu”, Lucifer Morningstar, the devil himself. 

“Dream of the Endless dropped in at Lux to see if Lucifer was behind a hex bag found in the dreaming.” You pulled a leather pouch from your pocket and Logan felt all the hair on his arms stand at edge, “It’s unusual here though, this type of magic. Even some of the most powerful magic users in this world haven’t seen anything like it, but to be fair it’s some creative work.” You pulled the drawstrings slightly to open it just enough for Logan to see inside. 

“Bones? And..” He squinted at the bag and you nodded as he finished, “Sand.” 

“It belongs to Dream. Also known as the Sandman, never seen without a raven,” you gestured to the bones in the palm of your hand, “and his sand. They contain fragments of his power, even in this state.” You stared at the item in your hand that weighed on you more heavily than the literal weight of its contents. You felt yourself veering towards tipsy but reached for your glass anyway. 

“The irony of who I’m saying this to isn’t lost on me, but you seem pretty quiet, even for you.” You threw a playful elbow nudge in Logan’s direction and completely missed, he caught your shoulder before you could fall over him onto the couch. His hand stayed on your arm as he shook his head as if to clear his head. 

“Have you seen anything like it?” Logan asked cautiously. If he was being completely honest the direction of this conversation was unsettling him for reasons he couldn’t place, it was a new feeling entirely. 

“That’s the million dollar question,” You smiled sadly, “I’m gonna need a favor, Lo.” You stood up and began  throwing all your strength into sliding the small couch you and Logan had just occupied out of the way, lifting the edge of the rug it had been resting on. You gestured to a particular floorboard, “Can you lift that one?” 

You expected another question or any hesitation really, but Logan stood and did as you asked. You reached into the opening as soon as the board was cleared and pulled out a small bag that looked nearly identical to the one you had shown Logan. 

“I have a feeling I’m not gonna like where this is goin’.” Logan huffed as you returned the floorboard and started to climb back into your seat. 

“Everyone told me the kind of things in the world I came from didn’t exist here, but even when I was with Lucifer and then came here, I couldn’t just…let my guard down?” It sounded like you were asking him a question but you just kept going, “I had been on the run for years, Logan, and everyone was telling me I was safe here, but-” 

“You were stuck in survival mode.” He said it as matter of fact, and you closed your eyes and nodded, “So you hid these here for…protection?” Logan was giving you a break, filling in the gaps he came to understand from what you were telling him and what he already knew about you. 

“Some are for protection,” You nodded, “Some of them actually act as little safeguards too so that if someone or something comes waltzing in here that shouldn’t be, it can bind them to the spot.” 

Logan chuckled, the way you delighted in your clever tricks not lost on him, “Can’t say we couldn’t have used a few of those before you got here,” 

“To be honest, I wasn’t even sure if they would work here. Still not totally sure, can only tell you that this one,” you pointed to the one fallen open with sand and bones, “Managed to work in the dreaming without Morpheus detecting anything.” 

You didn’t need to tell Logan you were scared, your heart rate was erratic enough for him to start to wonder if he should change the subject, shit on Scott for a while or something else guaranteed to get a chuckle out of you. This time a few years ago he might’ve done that, when you were both still new and he didn’t know how quickly you would become pivotal to his life, to everything he knew about who he was, not that he ever said as much. When it came to you Logan wasn’t prepared to take the easy outs, he needed you to tell him everything.  

“How does it work?” It was a careful question asked quietly, vague enough to keep you talking, but not specific enough to spook you. 

“It was basically hijacking some of Dream’s power. Whoever made this used it to create a little pocket dimension for themself deep in the dreaming, the only reason Morpheus found out at all was an increasing number of dreams and nightmares stumbling upon it only to be transported back to Morpheus’s castle with no memory of their hours before.” Your voice was just above a whisper, and you startled a bit when Logan snorted. 

“This guy has a castle?” He asked, raising an eyebrow. 

“You know, some would call this a castle, Logan.” You getured to the mansion you were seated in, tucked away in the cozy study that screamed wealth, intentional or not, “But yes, Morpheus, Dream of the Endless, King of Dreams and Nightmares. No one has that many names and doesn’t have a castle.” 

Logan caught the mocking tone and was grateful to hear it, “So are you telling me you ditched us to go hang out in a castle, Princess?” 

He smirked at you and your heart stuttered for a different reason entirely. Logan being insanely, ridiculously attractive was by no means new to you, but huddled next to the fireplace and calling you ‘Princess’, even jokingly….well, you took a deep breath and tried to laugh off just how flustered his comment made you. 

He knew, of course he knew. Any other night Logan may have finally taken the plunge, grabbed you by the chin to look him in the eye and ask if the two of you were ready to stop dancing around your feelings. But then again he had been telling himself that for months already, and the night of your return showing up being chased by ghosts from your past was probably not the best night to add more to your plate. 

“Something like that. I actually haven’t gone to the dreaming yet, Lu didn’t think…well, he thought-”

Logan stiffened and his mind started racing a thousand miles a minute while screaming at himself that he’s a fucking idiot, that he should have caught on to what this all meant sooner. 

“He thinks they’re coming for you?” It was growled through his teeth, but he needed to ask it. 

“He thinks…” you chose your next words carefully, not wanting to put Logan any more on edge than he already was, “That we don’t know enough yet to rule it out, and me prancing right into the dreaming, even with him and Morpheus-” 

“You need backup.” Logan finished for you as you nodded. 

“As much as I don’t want to involve any of you in this, I’m afraid I don’t have much of a choice. Logan, I,” you struggled with this next part, trying to figure out how to explain it. 

“Just say it, kid, don’t worry about how it sounds on my account.” 

“Logan, the best case scenario would actually be that they’re coming for me.” You whispered as Logan began to snarl, you continued talking faster, “The alternative is that someone with a lot of knowledge they shouldn’t have is trying to destabilize the dreaming. If that’s what’s happening, I’m not the only person in danger. Human and mutant alike, we’re all tied to the dreaming. If the dreaming dies…” 

“Alright kid, look,” Logan sat up in his chair and took your hands, that you hadn’t realized you were wringing anxiously, in his, “I’ve lived a long time, alright? Until I met you I didn’t know about all of this celestial bullshit, hell I still don’t understand half of what you’ve told me tonight.” You chuckled, acknowledging it was quite a lot to handle in general let alone around 3 am, “But you know what, bub? I’ve been in more wars than I’d care to count, we’ve been in battles with imperial space birds, and I’ve had to time travel enough that Chuck sometimes has to fill me in on what’s changed when my consciousness returns to the present.”

You looked at him quizzically, not having been aware of that last one and he shrugged, “You can be nosey about it later, my point is everyone under this roof has stopped the end of the world a few times by now, don’t go losing sleep before we even know what we’re up against. Give us some credit.” He winked at you and squeezed your hands before returning them to your lap and finishing his drink. 

You released a breath you hadn’t realized you were holding and smiled sweetly at him, a little too sweetly in fact, “That was quite the pep talk Lo, gotta be careful, some might say you’re starting to sound like Scott.” 

You expected a glare, maybe even an actual growl as you compared Logan to the ever present thorn in his side but instead he shrugged, “You tell anyone I said this and I’ll deny it, but one thing Summers and I agree on is tackling the big bads as a team. From this universe or whoever the hell else is stupid enough to come knocking.”

There were a few beats of silence as what Logan said soaked in, and even though your instincts were still screaming at you to run, when Logan told you you would face it and beat it as a team, god help you, you believed him.

[balkanradfem]

I know I just made a serious post and I'm about to post something silly but stay with me here. I've had an experience that was deeply unsettling and horrifying to me and my mental health, and now you have to hear about it.

So I was reading fanfiction, and you can judge me, it's fine, I don't feel guilty for my little thought crimes, but it was a m/m fanfiction of two fictional blorbos I will not name in this instance. And this fanfiction was absolutely beautifully written, the prose had me in the first sentence; it was sophisticated, detailed, words so unusual and interesting I had to consult a dictionary. It started off wonderfully too, my characters were bantering, they were having issues, then had to work together and be civil to each other, it's what puts a smile on my face.

However, one of these characters had been changed in the fanfiction, in a way that felt unsettling to me. First the author changed his hair to long – and it happens sometimes, I'm okay with it, why not, make him look like an elf. Then his outfits were color-coordinated, and described in detail (it was like reading my immortal). Then he started wearing his hair in a long braid, which is normal, but, then he changed it to two braids, which I felt, was taking it too far, like this would happen only if he lost a bet and was being made fun of. Then he lost all of his desire for banter and started acting very dainty and vulnerable. I was having a bad feeling about it, but I still hoped it would get better. Maybe they would still fight.

The fanfiction had some very detailed and unusual descriptions of food, and it was food I've never heard about, red onion marmelade? I had to stop reading to consider if that was real. The food was a big issue and every meal had several courses and multiple fancy deserts and we were getting information about ingredients and freshness level. Then the characters started a discussion about the food, and the character I'm describing understood in detail how food is made, from what ingredients, in what manner, and I've felt suspicious about that, how would he know about cooking. Unreasonable.

I've still been hanging onto hope until finally, I got to the part where this character was in the hospital, and here I found out that the author erased all of the scars on his body. Not only that, but the character was obsessed with having skin free of blemishes and flaws and from what I was seeing, probably had a skin care routine. This was deeply unsettling because the scars have been vital to the plot, a proof of what had happened to him, and to just erase all this to make him blemish free? There was no hope. I knew it then for sure. I understood what was happening. They had turned him into a tradwife.

The outfits, the braids, the blemish-free skin, the extensive cooking knowledge, the lack of banter, the dainty behaviour... they did that to a fanfiction character. A male character. Nobody is freaking safe. The trend is so strong it bled into my emotional-support fanfiction. I am stripped of one thing that usually comforts me, two fictional males having a female-written relationship.

And the other character, who was supposed to be pursuing him, was written like a sexual predator. Consistently turned on by all of the tradwife elements and pretty much only by that. I generally love this character but in this fanfic I hoped someone would kill him. It was disgusting and disturbing. By the time the characters got to intimacy I was grossed out and skipped it entirely because I was about to throw up.

This is a common issue for me, a big bulk of fanfiction has already been ruined by rape fantasies, by bdsm, ddlg, fetishes, pedophilia, power imbalances, and all other influences of patriarchal society but I can usually FILTER THOSE OUT. Nobody will tag a fic 'tradwife' after they do this to a character. I've never seen a fic ruined in this particular way before.

This is mormon church's fault. They did this to me. They need to be taken down for this bs. This is taking it too far. Give me my adorable fanfictions back.

[theyhavetakenovermylife]

I just wanna ask something before I hit the hay. I would love to see Leo and his g/f decided to have sex for their first time together. 2003 please, over the ages of 18 and they are both virgins. That would make my day!

Soft Love (Fluff) (18+)

2003!Leonardo x reader

A/N: Sorry it took some time. My inbox has exploded recently😂 But! *Clapping hands together* I got it done, and here it is. Hope you enjoy💙

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All characters are aged up.

Warnings: Spelling, first time, fingering, handjob, turtley anatomy, unprotected sex.

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You and Leonardo had talked about it for a while, both whispering about it in each other’s arms late at night. You talked it through, both of you wanting to take the extra step further in your relationship. But there was one thing holding both of you back, making you nervous, fidgeting slightly whenever you started talking about you. Neither you or Leo had been intimate with someone before. Sure, you had had your few run-ins with fellow humans in the past, but none of it had ever gone any further than a few kisses, your reasoning being that you just haven’t felt ready. But for Leo this meant much more than just being ready. You were his first girlfriend, after a lifetime of thinking that he would never find anybody to love him. But then you entered his life, turning this belief upside down, shining new light on Leo’s life and the way he viewed it. You were the best thing that had ever happened to him, and he was determined to show you just that, being the main reason he ever mentioned sex in the first place.

And finally, after several months of talking, it was happening. And you couldn’t have asked for a better evening. You and Leo pretty much had the whole lair to yourselves. Raphael was out with Casey, doing whatever those two usually did. Michelangelo was out fighting crime with Silver Sentry, while Donatello had gone to April’s place, so they could work on their new project in peace. And Master Splinter? Well, neither you or Leo were sure. But you wouldn’t be too surprised if he has gone to the Battle Nexus, in order to have some tea with the Daimyo. But that did not matter. All that mattered in that moment was you and Leo.

Kissing had never been uncommon for the two of you. Sure, Leo was the biggest on PDA, but even with his family around, he would sneak in a few kisses. Making out however, had always been strictly reserved to the comfort of you or his bedroom. Just like now, where you laid tangled up together on Leo’s futon mattress, with his blanket covering the two of you, your lips dancing together, and your hands slowly but hesitantly feeling around on each other. Leo’s hands had so far only been reserved for your torso, his hands slowly moving from your waist under your shirt, up and down your back, before softly running down your side. Your hands ran up and down his arms, feeling his muscles flex under your fingers as they moved. But once your hand rested flatly against Leo’s plastron, it was as if something clicked in his head, as he slowly pushed you from your side onto your back, following you down every step of the way.

You hummed against Leo’s lips as you snuck your arms around his neck, holding him close as he hovered above you, his soft touches on your waist making your head spin ever so slightly. Leo smiled against you, hid other hand playing with the stands of your hair. You felt your heartbeat rising in a way that Leo only could make it do, but this time it was slightly different. The best way you could describe it was it made you feel excited. Your fingers having a hard time staying still, just having to touch the skin around Leo’s neck and shoulders.

Leo hummed as his tongue slightly licked your lower lip though the kiss, asking for entrance, which you gladly gave, causing him to hum against you, as your tongues slowly started their slow dance. You shivered slightly. Every action you and Leo made, caused your body to heat up, creating a pulling feeling between your legs.

Leo moaned lightly against your lips, his strong senses having picked up on the scent of your arousal in the air. He broke from the kiss to place small kisses around your face, leaving you panting ever so slightly in your search for his lips on yours once more.

“I can smell you, (Y/N)”, he whispered, his kisses moving from your cheek, down your jaw and down your neck, his hand subcutaneously lifting your shirt up as his hand moved up your side. “You smell really good”.

“Leo”, you whispered, holding onto the edge of his shell, as you felt all of his words go straight to your core. As if it was instinct that drove you, you bend your knees opening your legs just a little more for him. This action made the scent of your arousal stronger. Leo had to stop his soft kisses on your neck for a moment, just so he could fight the need for dropping right on the spot. This was yours and his first time. It had to be special. He couldn’t just rush in there. He had to take it slow.

Leo pulled back so he could take a look at your face. You had only been kissing, and you already looked like one that was in heaven. Your cheeks red with a blush, your eyelids heavy, your pupils wide and your lips red from all that kissing, and your teeth that was now biting your lower lip as you watched him. Fuck, you were so beautiful. How did he ever get so lucky that he could have you?

Leo leaned his forehead against yours and let out a sigh of happy content. “I love you, (Y/N)”, he murmured, his deep breath fanning cover your face, his face so close you could easily just lean in and kiss him one more time.

“I love you too, Leo”, you said, your hand letting go from his shoulder, in order to find the hand that was still playing with your hair. With your fingers entwined, you brought his hand to your mouth, giving all three of his knuckles a kiss. “More than you’ll ever know”.

It took everything in Leo not to let his animalistic instincts take over. How dared you be so perfect that he almost lost his famous self control. Churring erupted from his chest as he connected his lips to yours once more, letting the kiss become more hungry this time. He almost lost it when you moaned against him.

Leo’s hands started subconsciously to push at your shirt once more, causing you to part from the kiss with mischievous yet nervous eyes.

“Do you want me to take it off, Leo?”, you asked, the blush on your cheeks deepening.

Leo had to remind himself how to breathe for a second. He had never seen you fully naked. Sure, he had seen you walk around his room and your apartment in nothing but underwear and a bra, but he had never seen what was hiding under them. So right now, as one of your hands went for your shirt, waiting for Leo’s answer, he could not help but tremble a bit out of excitement.

“Yes”, was all Leo could mutter out, his throat almost failing him as he did, anticipation so high that his tongue started to feel numb. He watched as you sat up, before slowly lifting the oversized shirt over your head, shaking slightly out of nervousness. Once the shirt Leo couldn’t help but stare at your breast, marveling at their shape and beauty. You, starting to feel a bit self conscious under Leo’s silent gaze, moved your arms to cover yourself.

“No”, Leo said, softly grabbing onto your arm. “Please don’t. You’re beautiful”.

A smile spread on your face, as you slowly moved your hands away, letting Leo stare at you. His hand moved from your arm to your chest, hovering over your breast, waiting for you to consent. You giggled and nodded, letting him know that it was okay. Leo’s hand was warm when it felt your breasts, his hand slowly cupping around one of them. You sighed in content, watching his hands as they touched you. His thumb slided over your nipple, causing you to let all a small moan, the wetness between your legs increasing once more.

As Leo slowly got to know your chest, and what movements caused a reaction from you, he slowly pushed you to lay down again, before he brought you in for a tender kiss. This tender kiss slowly evolved, until Leo started kissing down your neck once more, this time continuing down your collarbone and down over the top of your chest. You hitched a breath, your hands finding the top of Leo’s head, closing your eyes as you enjoyed the feeling of his lips against your skin. Leo hummed against your skin, as he made his way over your left breast, until he reached your nipple. You let out a moan as his tongue darted out over your nipple, arching your back slightly.

“Leo”, you whimpered almost involuntarily, reaching for his right hand, as his left hand started palming your other breast. Leo hummed as you entwined your fingers once more, churring with your nipple in his mouth, your hand tightening your grip around his.

“How does it feel, sweetheart?”, he asked before returning to you nipple once more, letting his tongue continue its slow work.

“It feels good”, you sighed, arching your back at his slow licks.

Leo let go of your left nipple, in order to focus his attention on your left, making you moan out once more. He already loved that sound. It did things to his head, and he liked it. He liked it a lot. Especially when you moaned and arched against him. It was enough to make a man go crazy for you.

Then something happened that neither of you had expected. You didn’t seem to notice it at first, but Leo did, growling against your chest, as he felt your lower half grind up against him. You gasped at the vibration that went through your chest, causing the scent of your arousal to grow so strong that Leo could no longer ignore it. Continuing his mouth’s work on your chest, he started grinding his own hips against you, once again feeling the urge to drop, when he heard you moan for him. Leo cursed under his breath, closing his eyes momentarily. You were a dream come true in every shape and form.

Slowly, Leo let his hand move down your body, until his hand reached your underwear, this thumb stroking your hip, just above your waistline.

“Can I?”, he asked, his lips making their way back up your chest, with your face as his goal.

“Yes”, you choked out, raising your hips, making it easier for Leo to slide your panties off, all while his lips found yours once more. Leo had to pull from the kiss, in order to get your panties off, before throwing them to wherever your shirt was. It was here that he suddenly came to realize that you were all bare for him. Your naked glory shining at him, like the sun on a blue sky. Once again he had to stare at you, his senses being assaulted with your sweet scent.

Leo leaned over you once more, letting you pull him down for another kiss. It was hungry but sweet, a passionate cluster of all the emotions you tried to show one another, even if your nervousness poked its head out every once in a while.

The hand that had taken your underwear off, made its way up your leg, Leo’s palm smooth against your thigh, as he made his way closer and closer to your core. You whimpered in anticipation, excited yet nervous for what his next move was goin to be.

“Can I look at you?”, Leo asked, hinting to the dripping rose between your legs. You nodded, biting your lip. Leo leaned back, resting his weight onto his knees and his toes, giving him a full view of your most intimate area. Like said before, you were absolutely beautiful. The sight of you, laying all naked before him, leaving all of you on full display for him. Leo had to put his hand on your knees, in order to keep himself grounded. He was almost so dizzy by his racing heart, that he felt like he was flying away.

“Wow”, Leo whispered, his eyes gliding along every curve of your body, his eyes lingering on your dripping core, glistering in the dim lighting of his room. “You’re fucking beautiful”. All you could do was giggle, flustered by his words, closing your legs just a little. To hear Leo curse was a rarity, making your heart jump in your chest at his words. But Leo pushed your legs apart once more, before leaning down to your face yet again, sweet seriousness written all over his face, one of his hands coming up to cup the side of your face. “I mean it. You’re beautiful, (Y/N)”.

You did not know what to say, your mind slowly becoming mush under his sweet words. The only way you knew how to react, was by connecting your lips once more, this time being your tongue that asked his mouth for entrance. The hand on your knee started running up your thigh once more, getting closer and closer to your core. You gasped in excited enjoyment against Leo’s lips, your mind focused on his sweet touch, his fingers mere centimeters from your delicate flower.

Leo broke from the heated kiss, his eyes staring deep into yours, his breathing heavy and his eyes hooded. He was like a sight sent straight from the gods, and you were mesmerized by his beauty.

“Do you trust me?”, he asked, his snout just gracing your nose.

“Yes”, you whispered back, your hand slowly guiding his fingers closer to where you needed him the most. “I trust you with my life, Leo”.

Your words caused Leo to moan out loud, as he dove back down for your lips, his fingers gliding over your slick covered folds. Both of you moaned at the connection, your wetness surprising both of you. Leo’s thumb found your clit, where he tried out a few different techniques before he finally found the movement that made you moan, louder than he had ever heard you moan before. It was at that moment he was glad, that the two of you had waited til you had the lair on your own.

Leo watched your face as he played with your clit, seeing your face contorted in pleasure. He felt the pressure against his cloaca grow once more. He was about to drop.

Leo’s finger found your entrance. He looked at you for permission, needing to know what he was doing to you was okay. You nodded to him, letting out a needy moan. Leo gave you a peck on your lips, before he slowly pushed his finger into your small hole. You gasped, looking down to where his finger was disappearing from your view, and in between your warm walls, stretching you out just a little. His fingers were bigger than yours, one of his almost feeling like two of yours.

Leo cursed under his breath, watching in pleasure and amazement as his finger disappeared into you, feeling your tight warm walls around him. He slowly pulled his finger out before pushing it back in, looking for your soft spot, making you tensen for a small second, moaning once more.

“Do that again”, you whimpered, watching his actions with hooded eyes.

“Anything for you, (Y/N)”, he said, kissing your cheek before repeating his action over and over. It didn’t take long before you started to continuously moan and whimper under him, your hands holding onto his shoulders. Leo couldn’t hold it any longer, feeling himself slowly slip through his slit, his length resting against your thigh, pre-cum leaking onto your skin, slowly dripping down to the underside of your thigh. Your curiosity peaked at the feeling of Leo’s penis resting against you, your hand finding its way down to him, before grabbing a soft hold of him. He was bigger than you had expected, feeling yourself getting slightly scared just by his size. But all that fear fated away, as you started your own work on him. Leo moaned as your thumb rubbed his head, before your hands started stroking his shaft, in the same speed as his fingers that worked on your insides.

“That feels good”, he breathed out, his eyes getting distant with pleasure, his fingers speeding up, with his thumb once again finding your clit, causing you to moan loudly.

“Fuck, Leo”, you moaned, feeling a slow pull in your lower region. Leo felt it too, your walls closing around his fingers ever so slightly, making you look him in the eyes once more.

“Do you feel ready, (Y/N)?”, he asked, his eyes full of love, lust, concern, and curiosity. Everything he could feel, he felt for you at the moment, his very thoughts and skin tingling in delight.

“Yes, Leo”, you said, giving his shaft a few more strokes, making him close his eyes in pleasure. “I’m ready”.

You removed your hand from his, as he positioned himself between your legs, placing one arm by your head, leaning his weight onto his forearm, his other lining himself up with your entrance. You held onto his shoulders, watching in anticipation as he moved his head against your folds, before he finally found your opening.

“Are you nervous?”, he asked, looking at you with sincerity.

“A little”, you answered. “But with you I know it’ll be good”.

Leo smiled warmly at you, his heart skipping a beat at your words, placing a sweet peck on your lips. “Just tell me if you want me to stop, and I will. I’ll never do anything to hurt you”.

“I know”, you nodded, a bright yet nervous smile on your face. “I trust you, Leo. Always have and always will”.

Leo nodded, watching you as he slowly pushed himself into your opening. Both of you moaned at the new feeling. You closed your eyes at the pleasurable yet painful stretch his size provided, biting your lip. Leo rested his hand on your waist, letting himself slide in further.

“Are you okay?”, he asked, placing small kisses all over your face.

“Yes”, you whimpered, leaning into his kisses, not fully sure how to explain it to him. “Just… full”.

“Is it a good thing?”, he asked, a boyish smile on his face.

“It is”, you said, humming as you felt the pain go away, getting used to his size inside of you. “Just getting used to it”.

Leo chuckled, showering your face with more kisses, even as you asked him to move. He did as you asked, slowly pulling out of you before softly pushing back in, letting both of you get used to the movements. Your hands help tightly on to him, as he slowly picked up his speed, your legs hiking up over his hip, letting your feet rest against his shell. Leo’s churrs got louder, resting his face against the crock of your neck, the hand on your waist holding onto you tightly as he thrusted into you.

Leo felt as if he was on cloud nine, feeling your soft walls hugging him tightly, pulling him further and further into a new world of pleasure. The sounds of you moaning his name, telling him not to stop made him shiver. The hand on your waist moved to your hand on his shoulder, placing it down on the bed, entwining your fingers as he continued to speed up the movements of his hips. He groaned, kissing your neck and shoulder, listening to how his actions continued to bring you pleasure, over and over again.

“Don’t stop”, you whimpered, your hand holding onto him for dear life, your knuckles turning wait. “Please, Leo, don’t stop”.

Leo hummed against you, whispering sweet nothings with every kiss, feeling your walls hug further and further around him with each and every thrust.

“I think…”, you whimpered, your nails on Leo’s shoulder digging lightly into his skin. “I feel something. I- it’s getting stronger”.

“I feel it too”, Leo groaned, both talking about the growing pressure in his lower region, and the tightening of your walls. “Let it happen. Let it come”.

Your legs grew more and more uneasy, no longer being able to rest against him. Leo had to let go of your hand and hold onto your leg, keeping you still as he drove into you, your back arching against his plastron.

“It’s coming, Leo!”, you moaned, so loud that if anybody else had been in the lair, they would be able to hear everything. “Fuck! It’s coming!”

“Let it go, (Y/N)”, he groaned, the rhythm of his hips becoming unsteady. “Let it go for me”.

You whimpered, making a sound that almost sounded like you were about to cry, none of your limbs being able to lay still. Leo leaned back, watching you with his mouth agape, feeling his own high getting closer and closer. And then it happened. Your bubble burst and you cried out against him, your hips moving against him as you came, your walls pulsating around him. That was the last thing before Leo came, his hips shuttering against you, moaning with you as he felt himself shoot into you, almost collapsing on top of you. Both of you, too shocked by this sudden burst of pleasure that caused both of your worlds to shake, stayed still for a moment, processing all of the feelings you had been through.

Once both of you had calmed down, Leo slowly pulled himself out of you, both of you groaning and moaning because of the friction in your now sensitive areas, before the sudden loss of feeling.

Leo laid himself down next to you, pulling the blanket up around you, as he pulled your sweating bodies close, letting you rest your head against his plastron.

“That was amazing”, you said, almost laughing from the strong feelings that still lingered around you.

“You’re amazing”, Leo retorted, making you giggle. He dipped down to your lips, kissing you one more time. “You’re amazing, and I love you”.

“I love you too, Leo”, you hummed, letting your lips linger against his for a moment.

“What do you say about we take a nap, and then we go take a shower afterwards?”, your considerate boyfriend asked, his lips still against yours, his fingers running up and down your arm.

“That sounds like a genius idea”, you said with a small laugh, letting your head rest against Leo’s first chest, feeling your eyelids get heavy as sleep started to creep up on you, lulling both you and Leo into a peaceful nap in each other’s arms. But little did you know, that when the two of you woke up an hour later, neither of you would go for that talked about shower, but instead squish in a quick round two, before Leo’s family would be making their way down to the lair.

[hbpseverus]

for all that us snape fans say how we love his character because he is flawed and complex, i find it disappointing how many of us can't extend that line of thinking towards lily, while pretending that young severus was entirely innocent. i've noticed this a lot recently and it's been bothering me quite a bit so i've felt the need to defend lily, or to be exact, analyse the downfall of their relationship without basically giving her all the blame and instead looking at both characters and especially lily more critically.

so. let's talk about the conversation between her and severus after the werewolf prank. some snape fans harshly criticise her in this scene because she insists that james saved severus and doesn't acknowledge how serious this prank was, while insisting that at least the marauders don't use dark magic.

and i agree that she should have been more on severus' side in this case. after all he could have died or gotten seriously injured, turned into a werewolf etc and she downplays the severity of the situation and generally doesn't acknowledge how the marauders bullied severus very much. so yes, she could have been a better friend here.

but at the same time, from her perspective, she was already noticing that severus was spending more time with his housemates, all of them aspiring death eaters, how he had always looked up to lucius and was slowly heading down that same path. how he didn't truly disapprove of his housemates disgusting actions towards muggleborns - her own kind. even though it's not entirely logical, since we see through the marauders that light magic can be used to do harm aswell, this also explains her dislike of dark arts, which these (aspiring) death eaters all were fond of and using to do awful things to her friends (and hogwarts also pretty much teaches that dark magic is pure evil). by this point she had most likely also experienced discrimination at hogwarts for being muggleborn. she knew the situation in the wizarding world wasn't favourable for her, and now her best friend was starting to agree with those people?

the next notable event was of course snapes worst memory (sigh, here i go talking about it for the millionth time). and i really don't like how some people on our side of the fandom talk about lily in this scene (of course, this is not all of us).

first of all we saw that she initially smiled upon seeing severus be bullied, and yes, this was honestly quite disgusting. we know that severus saw this and was rightfull hurt, and this very well could be the reason why he snapped at her. but that is her only 'crime' in this scene. because she then does quickly turn against james and this entire crowd and defends severus. only for james to insult and threaten her, and severus to call her a 'filthy little mudblood'.

now, people say she should have done more to defend severus, that her attempt was quite half-hearted. i don't know. maybe she could have done more, but she did tell the marauders to stop, you can't say she didn't try. some say she should have hexed james herself or bring up her prefect role (although i'm not sure it's confirmed she was one at this time). but say she was a prefect, her job would be to stop fighting, which she tried to do, not to get involved in fights herself. and you can tell that james is entirely dismissive of her and clearly won't let her stop him no matter what, even threatening her in the process. lily also genuinely seems to still hate him at this point in time, she is described to have been disgusted with him to the point where even harry questions his parents marriage. so i don't believe it's fair to say she was just 'flirting' with james here.

furthermore, people believe she should have forgiven severus for being called a mudblood. i used to agree that it wasn't that serious, but i feel differently now. because it wasn't just a word, it wasn't a one time mistake or slip up or even the first time she noticed that he was slowly turning into a future death eater. that's why i brought up their conversation after the prank. lily knows that severus' descend into the death eaters arms had been going on for months, years even. being called - not even just mudblood, but hearing the words "i don't need help from a filthy little mudblood like her" out of the mouth of her former best friend was just the final nail in the coffin. it was her confirmation that severus was finally too far down that road, and she, as a muggleborn, could no longer justify surrounding herself with him. so she abandons him at the scene, and i can't blame her one bit.

of course this post is not meant to be severus bashing in any way, he is and always will be my favorite character, but i don't enjoy pretending he was completely innocent, even his younger self. this is also not to excuse the marauders, as their bullying never had anything to do with severus possibly being a death eater and was really just for fun and because they could, and because he was an easy victim. but i truly believe that lily deserves some grace and also to be analysed as a complex character like severus, rather than painting her as one dimensional, either fully good or fully bad.

severus becoming a death eater is the tragic result of his background and surroundings, and when we analyse him we factor all of this in. lily was wealthier, had a better family, was pretty, smart and popular and had a good support system in and out of hogwarts. she couldn't understand why severus made the choices he did. maybe as an adult she would have looked back and understood it all better. but as it was, she was just a teenage girl watching her best friend turn against people like her and not knowing what to do about that. and what's also important to me to point out is that it was not her job to try and stop this, to try and fix him or whatever. it was first and foremost the adults in severus' life who failed him over and over again, not lily.

finally a lot of us can't understand how lily ended up marrying her former friends abuser and use this as an argument against her, but i honestly don't want to go too deep into this topic. i personally strongly dislike this relationship, because james treated lily herself like shit too, aswell as other people. we have to believe that he truly did change, even if there is not much to prove this. even if he did, i personally wouldn't have been able to forgive him. but i don't believe that marrying james makes lily a bad person by extension or anything. ultimately, if she was able to find happiness, i'm happy for her.

[aureliusbraniff]

I finished The Hobbit recently and I wanted to talk about it.

Full disclosure If you haven't read the book yourself, watched the movies, or seen any memes I would like to warn you moving forward in this review will contain spoilers

My rating: 3.75 ★★★★

Summary:

A high fantasy story set in an intriguing and expansive world. Throughout the story you mainly follow a character that's from a race called hobbits, and a bunch of dwarves. They get themselves into a number of predicaments throughout their adventure and we (the readers) get to witness their shenanigans, as well as meet a few interesting characters.

In the book your introduced the MC Bilbo Baggins, Gandalf, Thorin, Bombur, Fili, Kili, Bofur, Bifur, Oin, Gloin, Dwalin, Balin, Dori, Nori, and Ori. We also encounter other iconic characters such as Thranduil, Elrond, Beorn, Gollum, and Dain to name a few.

I can appreciate that this was revolutionary for the time and as you read this you can see how it influenced the fantasy genre. The writing style is very much a product of its time, so if your not used to early 20th century writing or if you don't like it, it might be difficult to get into this book. Aside from the style the way the story is written was difficult for me to read not in the sense that the writing was complicated it was just hard to immerse myself that might be a me issue, I'll revisit this if I decid to do a re-read. The characters don't get much development aside from Bilbo the MC. To a certain degree I would forget about some characters were there because they rarely did anything or weren't mentioned as frequently as others. So it was hard initially to get attached to characters even within the main cast. I will say that Fili, Kili, Bombur, and Thorin stood out to me the most out of the 13 dwarves. Gandalf was kind of just there which I find amusing it was quite literally just a side quest for him. Some of the other characters were decent, we don't really get to know much about them, but that makes sense since the book focuses on the Bilbo's perspective so it makes sense that readers would be kept in the dark.

I will also say that the world building is brilliant, it feels flesshed out despite it being a small book it was described in a way that still made it believeable and intriguing after the first 80 pages or so. I think it also helped that the characters kept moving from place to place. So that we got to several different locations in this world and the different species and some of the cultures in this world.

Some critics I have for this book is that the characters get into difficult situations and get out of them pretty conveniently. For instance Bilbo just randomly coming accross the ring was a good idea in a sense but it was too easy that he just passed out and when he woke up randomly came across it. Another example would be whenever they were captured by an antagonist (i.e. the trolls and goblins) and then last minute Gandalf would miraculously show up and save them. I get that he's extremely talented in magic and insanely powerful so much so he's a living MacGuffin but still it just felt to easy, and made me question why he couldn't do anything sooner. Don't get me started on when Smaug got super mad at them and instead of attacking Bilbo and company he decided to fly off and destroy Esgaroth. the only time I felt like the stake we're relatively high was when the humans we're trying to fend of Smaug, but that just made me more mad at the fact that Bilbo and company got off pretty much Scott free. I feel that it kind of lowered the stakes for me and so I didn't really feel concerned for the characters. Although it is a children's book so it can be expected. Another thing that bothered me was the songs, there were numerous songs throughout the book. I usually don't mind songs but they sounded the same, the lyrical style and rhyming scheme was the same despite the fact that some of these songs were coming from several characters from various different races and cultures. It just seems unlikely that they would be that similar. I understand that there can be similarities between different cultures especially when they are close to one another but there would also be some slight differences and there simply isn't. Also the book is written to be a translation. It seems strange that the songs were translated to rhyme in the first place. The likelyness of something rhyming from one language to another is slim, and if the song was translated to rhyme then would that not bastardize the original language of the song? It just really irked me.

However in a less critical note there is also some pretty good symbolism in the book some of the things that I noticed and saw from other reviews was:

Orcrist and Glamdring being symbols of heroism

The ring symbolizes power something that can be useful and handy in many situations but has its drawbacks

Thorin gets dragon sickness which can symbolize greed obviously and how quickly it can consume you and destroy your relationships in addition to yourself.

Also Thorin being buried with the arkenstone is nice not sure if it counts as symbolism. I think it could symbolize the heart of the mountain/people being returned to its rightful place

I would also like to add it might be the movies and memes that has corrupted my perception of Thorin and Bilbo's relationship I think it's kind of romantic that Thorin waited to die until after he saw Bilbo one last time. Also it might just be wishful thinking to support this claim Bilbo and Thorin hadn't known each other that long considering their species' lifespans. Not to mention Thorin's reaction to when he thought he had been betrayed. I know his mind was corrupted because of the dragon sickness and he was being protective of the gold and the mountains because of its significance to him and his people but even still he had a visceral reaction and seemed incredibly hurt. Either he was projecting his pent up emotions about the situation at Bilbo or he felt something for Bilbo those are the only two logical explanations to me. If you have other theories feel free to share.

TRIGGER WARNING ⚠️

Mention of Antisemitism -

Another thing I want to point out is the antisemitism. I didn't notice initially and I was confused because I had seen people talk about. In my copy around page 192 there was a strange and unnecessary comment about how the dwarves really are, and it did consist of common antisemitic characteristics. Although I wouldn't really associate the dwarves with Jewish people, but I can see why someone might see some similarities I suppose. I don't think it was a deliberate choice on Tolkien's part, I think it was probably an subconscious decision. Unfortunately in the case of a lot of popular books especially with classics this is a pretty common issue. Although from what I've heard he did apologize and was more cautious in LOTR. Which is something, I guess

[thehollowwriter]

Do you have any criticisms in regards to the official English translation of TWST?

I have many. So many.

Firstly is the unnecessary changes, mostly with Trey's UM and the name of magical shift.

See, the main thing is, a lot of people say "Paint the Roses" sounds way better than "Doodle Suit", which is goofy, and also works as an Alice in Wondeland reference The thing is, though, I'm pretty sure Doodle Suit is supposed to be a goofy name. It's a teenager naming his UM at about 16 or younger (before canon time), of course it'll be goofy. And on top of that, it is a reference! "Suit" is likely a reference to card suits!

The reason I find this change unnecessary is because you can't even say it was a translation complication, not only are the UM names and certain other words written in English in the JP game iirc, but after getting twst myself I CHECKED and they didn't even bother to RERECORD THE LINES. I can still hear Trey say, "Doodle Suit." I'm English when talking about his UM, but the text box says, "Paint the Roses"

The same applies to magical shift, which was changed to "spelldrive." Characters still say "magishift. " It's just such a useless bunch or changes to way too many names and stuff cause it was already right there in English.

Another issue I have with character names or event names that aren't said in English being different than the names fans have translated is that they often sound a lot worse or a bit weird than original. Like Baul and Baur. I think Baul sounds way better, but this overall could just be some fans not having a completely accurate translation? But tbh we have a lot of bilingual speakers who also talk about the strange differences.

My MAIN NUMBER 1 ISSUE IS THE CENSORSHIP

I'm still so mad that they removed that scene of Cater saying he would absolutely date Vil and that they altered lines from one character to another that could be interpreted as romantic or flirty (only to then, in some cases, ramp up the flirt vibes, ironically).

It's just so disingenuous and was definitely not a mistake.

And of course, iirc, replacing describing Vil as "beautiful" with "handsome" instead because we don't want to give the character whose whole thing is defying gender roles a feminine description, no, that's ridiculous/s

Then there's Azul's backstory. As someone who's only access to twst's story was through translations, both because Eng hadn't released and I'm in the wrong country, it was really icky to see how they watered down the things Azul's bullies said to him.

I just... they were calling him a fat, slow, ugly, and stupid octopus, among other terrible things, and then we got to twst Eng where it's just "silly octotwerp" ?????

Like they were either trying to make it kid friendly (even though this is NOT a kids' game) or they didn't want to put emphasis on the fact that Azul was bullied for his weight. If you ask me, in the official Eng translations, it's actually a bit harder to pick up on the fact that that's part of why Azul was bullied and hates his old self so much.

It's something that really frustrates me, because it makes Azul come across more as a bit of a spoiled kid who got lightly teased and held a ridiculous grudge over it (even if octotwerp is still a bit mean) rather than a deeply traumatised teen who's body image and mental state was badly effected by the severity of the bullying he received. He's constantly bringing up calories, Floyd mentioned he barely eats, etc.

I'm sure this can apply to a lot of other chapters, especially Book 4 with Jamil and Kalim, but I'd like to rewatch YouTube translations and then go through twst Eng before I talk about them

Anyway, rant over now fjffj

[silverofthunder]

— play with me —

Papa Emeritus I (Primo) x Female Reader || 🔞

summary: ”You can play with me whenever you want.”

content: 1.1k words, romance, vampire!Primo, blood drinking, suggestive touching, maybe some dom/sub nuances

Oh well, what can I say? I just couldn't resist. The ending is not quite how I wanted it to be but I guess this is okay. Had fun writing this, anyway, so that's what matters. Enjoy!

It was so quiet at the Ministry library that you could have heard a needle drop to the floor. You were sitting on the armchair in one of the lounge corners, reading some old romance novel you had happened to find. The library had closed about a few hours ago but no one really cared if someone would stay there even for the whole night so you enjoyed the quiet and focused on reading. Romance wasn't usually your first choice yet you had decided to give this one a chance and the story had actually captured you pretty much right from the start. It wasn't a typical happy romance – there were some dark undertones and bittersweetness in it and it had drawn you right in. Everything was described so palpable that you could feel the thrill of the main characters when they interacted with each other.

A slight creak reached then your ears, startling you and your head shot up, gaze trying to see if there was someone else joining you. However, you couldn't see anything past the light, only darkness between and with a sigh and a shrug, you returned to reading again. Only a few sentences later, there was another sound, this time like a wind blowing and you wondered if someone had actually come and opened window for some reason. You didn't usually get scared easily but as the sound seemed to get louder, you felt your hearbeat fasten, chills running over your skin. Focusing on the words on the page seemed to be the best idea, so that your imagination wouldn't get too wild. There really wasn't any threats at the Ministry, someone was probably just messing with you.

As a pair of hands wrapped around your neck from behind soon, you stopped breathing for a second. The hands felt cool against your skin, the touch making you shiver. Gently they tilted your head and then you sensed someone leaning to spoke right into your ear. "Reading something good, cara mio?" That deep, yet soft voice with a hint of danger was enough to make you relax and you hummed in reply, your lips spreading into a smile. You turned your head, seeing Primo there, looking at you with undeniable hunger. His fingers ghosted over your neck, slowly, examining, and you knew what he was after. "Looking for a snack, perhaps?" you smirked, pulling your hair out of the way and tilting your head more to tease Primo. Primo let out a low growl, placing then a kiss right under your ear. "Wouldn't say no to a small taste," Primo said, and you chuckled. Of course he wouldn't say no.

"Go ahead, my love," you gave a permission, and Primo didn't need to be told twice as he pressed his mouth against your neck and then there was a sharp sting as his fangs pieced your skin. The pain hit soon, still feeling a bit unpleasant even though you had gone through this several times. You gasped as Primo started sucking your blood, the pain slowly subsiding as the venom numbed it. Primo moaned against your skin, sliding his other hand down to cup your breast – a good thing that you had no bra on this time – and you drew in a sharp breath, feeling the heat gathering in your core. You grabbed your thigh with your hand, fingertips digging into the clothed flesh while your other hand tightened its hold of the book. Primo caressed your breast with skilled moves, his thumb pinching your hardened nipple, your shirt only adding to the feeling, the fabric causing more friction and your breath hitched.

"You want more than blood, huh?" you managed to ask and Primo hummed into your skin, the vibrations coursing through your body. He continued sucking and caressing you for a while, and just as you could have been ready for more, he withdrew his hands and fangs, running his tongue over the spot he had bitten. "Maybe later," he now answered to your question, then taking a hold of your chin and turning your head so that he could seal your lips in a kiss. You could taste your own blood on his lips, the metallic nuance of it mixing with something more earthly. Something purely Primo. When Primo started to pull away, you tried to chase his lips and he chuckled, gently stopping you. "Always so eager," he spoke sofly, his eyes filled with satisfaction and adoration as he looked at you. "Ti amo, bella mio."

Your heart fluttered, a warm smile spreading onto your lips.

”I love you, too.”

A moment of silence passed between you and you decided to abandon the romance novel – you could always come back to it later and you probably would do so as the story was way too intriguing to leave unread. You set the book on the nearest table and stood up, approaching Primo who was watching you intensively. You stopped right in front of him, lifting your hand up and hooking your finger on the collar of his robe, giving it a light tuck.

”Did you try to scare me before coming to me?” you asked, brow quirking up. Primo shook his head but the way the corners of his mouth twitched, gave you a different message.

”It didn’t work that well.”

”Your heartbeat told otherwise,” Primo stated, smirking, and you shook your head.

”I wasn’t actually scared.”

Primo chuckled lightly and before you even realized he had you pinned against the wall, his hand around your throat. He bared his fangs, leaning closer to you and inhaling your scent.

”Apologies, my dearest,” he said, giving a quick peck on your lips. ”But I needed some thrill before having a snack.”

You weren’t surprised by that and you couldn’t blame Primo for chasing that feeling of thrill of making the prey scared. It was only natural for his kind. And considering the situation you were basically his prey, a personal supply.

”You can play with me whenever you want.”

That seemed to please Primo, the look in his eyes darkening, his hand moving from your throat and tangling in your hair. Then he kissed you hard and demanding, his free hand snaking around you and pulling you flush against him. You grabbed a handful of his robes on his sides, and when he tucked at your hair lightly, you moaned, your knees buckling.

He kissed you until you were running out of breath, only then pulling back, and searching for your gaze. You looked at him under your lashes, breathing heavily and lips tingling. There was a satisfied smile on Primo’s lips, his dark gaze now having a warmer edge as he untangled his hand from your hair and slid it under your chin.

”Oh, you really know how to please your man.”

You flashed Primo a teasing smile.

”What makes you happy, makes me happy, too.”

[littleoneamanda]

GF: Fiddleford Hadron Mcgucket

Alright, I think I'll just continue drawing in the original style. It's actually pretty fun xD The only difference is colored lines and maybe background. Hope you like it!

And here we go again to my thoughts on the book of bill, thisisnotawebsitedotcom and my thoughts on Fiddleford as a character. Or in this one is more like a summary of what information we have about him. Welcome to my second essay on 2D characters xD (SPOILERS)

Oh boy, where do I begin with this one? xD

Fiddleford, probably (imo) one of the most tragic character in this show. Going from once a brilliant inventor to a deranged hillbilly living at the dump. His life ruined by trauma, his fear of bad memories, and by his own invention.

College

Fidds is the first Mcgucket in the family to go to college. His first day starts off pretty rocky. The school's mascot "THE BMU B-", shoved him into a locker, got his mustache caught in a pencil sharperner (???) and getting laughed out by a whole class for trying to prove the universe was a giant hologram. While sitting in his room in tears, his room mate barge in the room. Confidently declared that his theory was plausible and was ready to not sleep until they have proved it accurate. Not only did they cracked it, but Fidds did something else that he thought was impossible: He made a friend, Stanford Pines.

This is pretty much (currently) the information we have about them in college. I really wish there were more. It seems both of them became friends very fast. Both being nerdy and outcasts for different things. Ford with his sixth finger and Fidds coming from a hog farm ( I relate so hard with Fidds on the farm background you have no idea I love it) However, while Ford is more of a socially awkward introvert, Fidds seems to be a little bit more extroverted.

After college

Fiddleford moved to Palo Alto, California. Around this time he met his wife Emma-May and they had their son Tate.  He starts up his own computer buisness "Fiddleford Computermajigs". It's unclear how the relationship between Fidds and his wife were, but the fact that he doesn't seem to hesitate to leave them behind to help an old college friend he haven't talked to in 6 years is a little weird. Six years is how long Ford had been in Gravity Falls before he contacted Fidds. (Source: Journal 3). Sure, if the whole project was a positive thing, it could be have been their big break in science and fame. But Fiddleford had a life in California. He had a family, but how good was the marriage? Maybe Fidds didn't get any other friends after college. So when Ford called for help, he didn't seem to hesitate to say yes and join him.

"Success! He has agreed to join me! With his assistance, I am confident we can complete the machine. He has already made several suggestions over the phone that I intend to incorporate into my revised designs."

-Stanford, Journal 3

Gravity Falls, Fiddleford is now Stanfords assistant/partner.

Some things Fiddleford brought with him: A vase/pot when he chews tobacco, a photo of his family, the banjo, floppy disks , two laptops which one of them is special designed for Fords extra finger. The other one is Fidds which has Fords name as password. And a Cubic's Cube that Ford scrambles when Fidds is not looking. Fidds solves it without a problem tho.

When seeing the blueprints for the portal for the first time, he asked Ford if he had any help with these plans because of complex they are. Ford describes Fidds as a suspicious man (pretty ironic knowing how Ford will become later).

During his time in Gravity falls we learn early that Fidds seems to have some trouble handeling his anxiety. Especially after some of the things they encountered. His knee starts bouncing when he's agitated or he starts pulling out his hair. Being Fords assistant turned out to be adventurous and scary at the same time. Reading Journal 3 you kinda wonder why he even stayed for so long with Ford. There was times he really got traumatized. It is now where the we get into the speculations and the hints of Fidds having a bit of stronger feelings for Ford than just a friend.

The gifts. Already in Journal 3, he gives Ford a special designed laptop with extra keys for his extra finger. He buys a pumpkin at the fair because it reminded him of Ford.

"He pulled it out of a barrel of "reject gourds" because he said it reminded him of me! (Suppose I did inherit my dad's nose.)

-Stanford, Journal 3

From the thisisnotawebsitedotcom, if you type in Oroborous, you will get two pages of when Fidds gave Ford an axolotl that Ford named it Frilliam.

"F said it's frills reminded him of my sideburns and he thought it could keep me company the next time he's out."

-Stanford, thisisnotawebsitedotcom, Code: Oroborous

I'm still pretty traumatized after Frilliam...that damn dorito asshole demon. Also...Ford drew a heart over the "i" in friend instead of the dot??

In the TBOB, Fiddleford gives Stanford a snow globe that HE MADE. And not only that! He gives Ford knitted a pair of six-fingered gloves that HE has KNITTED.

Fiddleford flies back home to visit his family for the holidays, but the reunion have not been exactly happy. Fidds and his wife had got in a massive fight when she realized he'd forgotten to buy her a Christmas Present...man. Look. I mean...I honestly do not know what to say to that. My guy gave gifts that he had made to his bestfriend that he might have some certain feelings for and just happen to forget he had a wife...that's normal right? xD

Let's talk a little bit about Ford cause I forgot to mention some other things as well. In journal 3, Ford talks in a certain way. It's more sterile and stiff. Keeping distance from emotions pretty much. Especially before the 30 years on the other side of the portal. In TBOB+ the pages from the website, these pages are more personal. Which is a whole new view of Ford that we didn't see before. This time we get to see what Fidds and Ford did when they weren't focused on the project. When they had a winter break from it. When Fidds tells Ford he's leaving to visit his family, you can kinda read between the lines that Ford seems very sad about that. His fear of being alone again. On that page, there are some blue stains which some believe are tears... :(

"Sixer was a lot better at science than he was at making friends, and he tended to rip out journal pages that had anything to do with his issues with others..."

-Bill, TBOB

After the massive fight between Fidds and his wife, he decides to return to Gravity Falls as soon as possible. When he reurns, he sees Ford being in trouble and saves him from the Krampus by hitting him with his banjo. They embraced. Fidds explains why he's back and Ford asks him if there is anything he could do to cheer him up. But Fidds feel pretty defeated by everything that has happen.

That night, Ford calls Fidds to come down to the lab for a portal update.

"I'll admit that it wasn't the most efficient use of our electricity, but the smile on his face proved I'd made the right choice."

-Stanford, TBOB

Ford later tells that it was time to drink nog until they didn't remember what a Krampus was. And they spent the rest of the night building snowmen and reminiscing about old times.

This is wholesome asf. Also, Ford said himself he's not really a drinker, but after that kareoke drunk thing, I wonder if he kinda wanted have a similar experience? Perhaps a stretch, but interesting in my opinion.

But all good things comes to an end. In Fiddlefords case, in a very tragic way. After some traumatic encounters (especially after the  Gremloblin), he invents the memory gun. He uses the gun multiple times on himself during his time with Ford. He have even used it on Ford at one point when Ford tries to talk him out of ever using it.

The night before the testing of the portal, Fiddleford expresses his concerns to Ford about the portal. He tries to talk him into publish his research as a thesis instead of the portal. Ford who has been ver manipulated at this point to believe Fiddleford has ill intentions, refused. And the next day...the portal incident that makes Fidds mental state go so south. Seeing the Nightmare realm and  predicting apocalyptic catastrophe that was about to be the consequences of the portal.

Now here is a interesting thing about the portal scene (this could be a stretch once again). Something i did notice while rewatching s2. When Ford tells the story about the portal, it seems pretty cut and clear of what happen. Fidds get dragged into the portal, traumatized, warns Ford, stands up and leaves. And Ford calls Stan. Which makes it look like everything happened in a very short time period. But when Ford talks about the portal incident again with Dipper, Ford has different clothes, sitting down and have Fidds in his lap. Now this could just be a mistake or something they choose for more dramatic effect. But seeing the difference how Ford talks in Journal 3 and TBOB, it is a interesting choice for that scene. Like, when he has the white shirt and black tie, there is a more serious tone and stiffnes. When he has his blue shirt and brown sweater vest he is more personal. In TBOB, it takes like around 2 days before he finally decides to contact Stan. He decides to do that after he found the 5 failed knitted prototypes for the perfect 6-fingered gloves and the ripped photo. When he realized he had lost Fiddleford.

Fiddleford's mental health keept getting worse. After quitting the project, he found himself still very haunted by everything he has seen. He started to use the memory gun even more and created an organization, The Blind Eye Society. Hoping this would help other people in the town to forget bad memories. Ford found this out and suspected Fidds to be behind it. Unfortunaly, Fidds started to use it as soon as he had seen something scary. The more he used it, the more he started to lose his mind and forgetting words. 618 days. It took around 1 year, 8 months, 1 week and 6 days. That is not really a long time. He used it so frequently, and knowing he had some trouble handling his anxiety from the start…this hurts. His body aged so fast during this time as well. And he's suppose to be around the same age as Ford, around or in his 30s.

Fiddleford before the portal: a very smart, brilliant inventor, sensitive and a very kind person.

After the portal: An old deranged hillbilly who lived at the dump with no memory of his past, but still haunted by what he saw in the portal.

He does starts to regain his memories in S2: Society of the Blind Eye. Finding out after 30 years who he really was.

"After all these years I finally know who I am. Maybe I messed up in the past, but now that I've seen what happened, I can begin to put myself together again."

-Fiddleford, S2, "Society of the Blind Eye"

When Ford and Fidds reunite in Weirdmaggedon, he forgives Ford for everything that led up to this. After Weirdmaggedon, Ford visits Fiddleford. Fidds was overjoyed to see Ford and they spent hours talking. Ford is feeling guilty for the things leading to Fidds causing losing his memories, but Fidds dismisses his attempts to apologize.

"Not only is this man's mind superior to mine, but he has one of the biggest hearts I've ever seen."

"Before I left, Fiddleford insisted that I listen to him play the banjo. I could have sworn that as he joyfully played, i could see the age lift off his face, and see the the Fiddleford who had been my friend so many years ago."

-Stanford. Journal 3

I swear a tear dropped from my eye while writing this quote. And I have an idea for a drawing for just that one.

And that's where I wanna leave this. A happy ending after all :)

I'm very sorry again if there are any grammar errors in this one. I have to go back and forth on the sources a lot here. The show, books, website and the wiki just to try understand the timeline and if there were any details missed. I did not intend for this one to be as long (maybe even longer) about Stanford. But I kinda wanted to put Fiddlefords story together and give some of my thoughts on it as well. Fiddlefords story is so sad in so many ways. He and Ford, Best friends and room mates in college. Both of them having no other friends than each other. He sacrifices a lot when he leaves his family to help Ford in Gravity Falls, Returns to Ford when the family reunion goes south. The fact that he could have done anything else, but he decides to go back to Ford. Maybe because he felt he didn't feel welcome there anymore and only has Ford left. Tate is probably the one I mostly feel sorry for in this situation. His father coming home for the Holidays and then leaves again to not come back. Fidds trying and wanting to help Ford, but get his concerns about a real danger ignored. Then Fidds trauma and fear of remembering bad things takes over so much he invents a memory gun that becomes his addiction. Ruined by his own invention.

Now, I'm someone who has NEVER done shipping art or not really expressing any thoughts about it. I'm pretty careful with that honestly and I have been with Ford and Fidds as well. But this time feel so different from the other times of speculations of what happend between them. It feels like it's right there. Especially with Fiddleford reading TBOB what he did for Stanford. Or maybe I'm just another person hoping a little bit too much xD It's just...the possibility of them having some kind of stronger feelings is there. Again, Especially when it's from Fiddleford. Stanford is kinda bit harder to read when it comes to his feelings. Kinda what I said before, he talks in two different tones. Probably depends on who he trusts to talk to.

Alright, That's all folks! I promise I won't do a essay like this for the other drawings xD But I just needed it to get out of my system. And I haven't really seen a post like this that sums up the information we have atm. So I wanted to contribute xD

Thanks for reading!

Next up is actually going to be a GF video🍃

[twochildreninamoteldemo]

what’s on your personal list of “must reads” for wincest? i have a feeling you’ve got good taste

- @spn2006

i wouldn't necessarily say i have a must-read list as in everyone has to read something, because everybody has different taste, especially when it comes to sam and dean's dynamics (both sexual and otherwise), but the fics that i would heartily recommend that fall into my reading of supernatural (or adjacent to it) go as such, keeping in mind that I am a samgirl, pretty much only care about early seasons, and enjoyer of the family horror of the show:

The Ballad of the Invisible Boy + Two Headed Boy by @dollyluxed

If i had to pick any fic as a must-read for a samgirl cestie, this would be the one. the yearning and desperation speak deeply to the isolation of samdean's youth, especially how sam feels it, and dollylux isn't afraid to get inside the beast of teen angst, which makes it feel really lush and visceral. the 90s nostalgia is excellent (disclaimer: i was born after the 90s, but it made me feel like i was there without being corny), and the way the story is told through several vignettes feels a lot like the show itself. these kind of snapshot short films of how samdean's codependency develops through this unspoken tension over the years. the stanford era portion has a scene i think about every time i listen to joni mitchell (check out the soundtrack for this duology too; it's excellent), and the season 1 section ties together the story in a way that fits well with the show. a slow burn, really beautiful story, and i love the illustrations. i would also recommend dollylux's shorter works for amazing smut:)

@applecrumbledore 's fanficography

The first of Roni's fics I read were "Dream fuckery" and "Drywall dust" (the latter the first of a 4-part preseries story), and the balance of angst, sexual tension, and humor blew me away. It keeps the tone of supernatural, which a lot of fics don't (which is fine), but this was super cool in that it felt extremely natural, and very fun to read. I haven't been updated in all my fanfic reading lately, but I loved the beginning of Pine Sweat, their time travel fic, and "try asking," their pov outsider fic, is fucking hilarious and exhilarating. they have lots of creative ideas from preseries to late seasons and it never gets old!

Gospel Truth by @cowboyified

A case fic with an accute sense of shame embedded within angst, a really great sense of description, and perfectly inspired by art by @thegoodthebadandtheart for the reverse bang a couple years ago. the aesthetic of both frauke's work and the fic itself feel real, both the openness of the great plains and the claustrophobia of incestuous pining. definitely a modern classic.

"Buy You a Mockingbird" by candle_beck

the dark pov outsider fic to crown all others. candle_beck is an amazing writer and i also recommend all their work, but this one in particular stands out because of the horror of the dramatic irony of the story--what the reader knows, but the pov character does not. it's incredible to see everything unfold, and a realistic if bleak interpretation of another classic trope (which i won't name for spoiler's sake).

"Other Brothers" by @homo-pink

another incredible pov outsider fic with this beautiful sense of empathy and also a hint of adrenaline thrill. sam's cheeky and sassy and smart, and dean's cute and so in love. pov outsider weecest has the potential to be disturbing or sweet, and while this teeters the line, i think it falls into the latter category in a way that doesn't feel too saccharine.

"Three Days on the Rack" by keerawa, read by Reena Jenkins

I'd highly recommend listening to this via podfic! reena is great and there's a lovely cello cover of fade to black by metallica that plays in the interlude. anyway, the fic is an orpheus and eurydice-adjacent story about sam trying to get dean out of hell--but it's a torture fic. i love the way it describes hell, i love the way we see dean in the depths of alistair's apprenticeship, i love sam's strength. another gorgeously dark gem.

"Skin Like Fear" [orphaned]

I can't speak much on this one because I don't remember it super well, but it's a take on samdean after sam's hell trauma, something not very touched on by the fandom, and the horror is super well done, it's a great fic. obviously dark, deals with rape aftermath, proceed accordingly.

"show me again, shame takes hold" by objectlesson

if you can't tell yet, i really love preseries fics. this one is a lesbian femchesters AU, butch dean i love u foreverrrrrr. as you can tell by the title, more angst, more shame, etc etc. i was catholic what can i say. there's a lot about the ambiguity of sexuality and gender in this fic too.

and that's it! some of my other favorites are "Tomcat," the Caged Desires series, "The Truth in His Bones," and Brothers, but those i wouldn't necessarily rec on a wide basis because the first one is specifically about transmasculinity, and the second 3 deal with dom!dean/sub!sam dynamics in a pretty sharp way that everyone may not sit with right. that being said they're wonderful and sexy (and the last two, rather sad). let me know what u thought of this list!

[sleepingdeath-light]

male s/o hcs ; wally darling

requested by ; anonymous (09/05/23) [2/2]

fandom(s) ; welcome home

fandom masterlist(s) ; here

character(s) ; wally darling

outline ; “WELCOME HOME FANFIC WRITER LETS GO?!

Uhhhh dating headcanons for Wally and eddie please? 👉👈 sfw please!! ✨❤️

And can s/o be male? 😳 much obliged!!!”

warning(s) ; none, just fluff!

refers to you as his husband or the mister in general conversation with other neighbours (e.g. ‘did you hear what my husband did the other day?’ or ‘it’s getting quite late, i should head back, the mister’s expecting me’)

this is because whilst he’s neutral to marriage as a whole, he definitely sees himself marrying you and wanted to get used to using those terms as soon as possible

you have matching pyjamas like an old married couple, as well as matching cups that you use every morning (they both say ‘mr darling’ and barnaby got them for your first anniversary)

you are the one thing standing between an in-the-zone wally and him downing his paint water by accident — this has happened several times and you only realised after you heard him hacking and coughing from the other room

you’re the only person who can get away with stealing some of his apples, but he will still jokingly call you a thief for it

he’s kind of like a cat in that he’ll just randomly come and lounge across your body when you’re sitting down and he wants attention, or how he’ll just randomly cause problems to get your attention away from what you’re doing

calm boyfriend vs gremlin boyfriend energy

he has a very specific hair routine and you can guarantee that you’ll need to air out your bedroom and bathroom to get rid of the biohazardous amount of hairspray he uses

he turns into something of a koala when he sleeps and he’ll just cling to you

he enjoys spoiling you with breakfast in bed

he has loads of paintings and sketches of you hanging about home and you’ll just randomly end up stumbling across them wherever they were last left — which has given you multiple heart-attacks over the years

you’re 100% his muse and he’s not ashamed of telling you about it

he sleep talks sometimes and it’s usually when he’s dreaming about you — nearly incoherent but sweet is the best way to describe it

picnic dates are a must

thinks you look the absolute most when you steal his neckties and sweaters

most pda with wally involves holding hands or him kissing your hand, otherwise he tends to be pretty conservative about it

[painted-bees]

aw yay! Here's a bunch more OC questions sent my way by @wulff20ko <3

promt description: Questions about two of your original characters about their relationship. Should work for friends/lovers/coworkers/enemies/etc, maybe not so much for family, but you're welcome to try!

Answering all of these for Margie and Raf again lmao

1) How did they meet?

Like this!

2) How long have these two characters known each other? 

 Since 2008..! I think the last piece of Hi-Note writing that currently exists takes place in 2014. So–six years over the span of their story so far.

3) What were their first impressions of each other? How does that compare to their impressions of each other now?

 Raf thought Margie was a bit strange and ditzy, and she rubbed him as a pathological humble-bragger at first–which was…really unattractive to him lmfao. He initially kinda pulled at that thread in the interest of seeing the whole thing quickly unravel only to discover that she’s legitimately some manner of undiscovered genius who has absolutely no idea just how incredible she is.

  Margie thought Raf was a charismatic player “says that to all the girls” sort–with some shade of mental illness that made it all feel a little too uncanny to be fully effective. She was technically right, but quite differently from what she initially thought lmao.

  Nowadays, Raf knows Margie is his superior in several avenues; she’s a smarter, faster learner, an adaptable problem solver, a far more brilliant musician, and the most genuine, kindest, patient person he’s ever known.

  And Margie knows now that the guy she met in the train station was a fictional character that Raf employed to stand between himself and the threat of forming meaningful relationships. The real Raf is a quiet, anxious, isolated pessimist buoyed by the hope that he isn’t the only person in the world who wants to do well by others.

3) How would they describe each other if asked? Physically? In personality?

  Raf: “Margie? She’s brilliant, she’s sweet. You won’t meet a more incredible person.”

  Margie: “Raf’s a huge dork with a dorkier smirk and you just kinda gotta treat him like a cat if you want to make a good impression on him. Y’know like–just sorta ignore him, let him come to you first.”

4) Do they get along? Why or why not?

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

5) Do they have any shared interests/hobbies? Do they ever do these hobbies together?

 Pretty much most things, these days. Music, walks, rock flipping at low tide… If Margie does anything, she prefers doing them with him. Good experiences are best shared!

6) How often do they see each other? Where do they usually meet?

  Well, initially it was just every Thursday for jam sessions. And then Raf started inviting Margie to crash at his place. Now they live and work together.

7) How do they communicate with each other? Are there any recurring phrases or gestures unique to their relationship?

  Their relationship only exists as it does because of how they communicate with each other. They’ve developed a lot of little shorthand gestures to indicate to one another that things are good and there’s nothing to worry about, such as here. But there are also clear signals they provide when one needs some space or time alone, or if hugs are in order, and other such things. They’ve established a baseline understanding that when they are mad, it is never at each other–and have agreed not to assume that just because one of them is upset, it’s because they’re upset at the other specifically. The person who is upset will always take the time to explain what upset them, once they are able to properly articulate it. Until then, the priority is making sure they get the space or whatever they need to calm down and process what they’re feeling and why.   If they were unable to establish free and easy modes of communication with one another, where they don’t put each other on trial, on the spot to immediately defend their behaviour in the heat of a moment, but give each other the space and grace to process and discuss things under calmer, less volatile circumstances, the wheels would fall off this relationship real quickly, real dramatically. 

8) What is one quality they have in common?

  They love music! They love playing music–together!

9) What is one major difference between them?

  Margie is a very rosy optimist, and Raf is a very calculating pessimist. 

10) Does one act as a narrative foil to the other? How so?

  Yeah, It’s very puppy and cat. Raf’s long established career and jaded burnout vs Margie’s nascent/struggling career and bright-eyed, passionate energy. Margie’s willingness to trust and believe the best in people, vs Raf’s pathological mistrust/suspicion and the constant threats he sees hidden in the actions and words of all those around him. Margie’s ability to bounce back from failures and adapt to challenges–it’s all a learning process for her, vs Raf's stubborn rigidity and unwillingness to compromise–failure is devastating for him. Raf helps Margie keep her feet on her ground so that she can make more purposeful strides towards her goals. Margie helps drag Raf out of his paralyzing anxiety spirals, and keeps his creeping cynicism at bay.

11) Do they have any affection for each other? How do they show it?

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

12) Do they have any disdain/contempt for each other? How do they show it?

oooh…Raf, at his worst, can feel quite overwhelmed with resentment towards Margie for how much sway she has over his feelings of worth and wellbeing. At times when he feels like she fails to understand how her actions can dictate his moods, and fails to behave in a manner sensitive to this [it’s very mercurial and unpredictable what exactly this entails–what sets him off], it’s really tempting–and it feels wholly just–to lash out just to make her feel a fraction of the discomfort/hurt he’s feeling, as way of some kind of punishment. Instead, he gets really quiet and withdrawn, sometimes for a week or two. Margie understands this as “mental health is happening at him” and takes care to stay well out of his way until he’s wrestled control of his narratives again. 

Margie’s got nothing but love in her heart for Raf.

13) Do they share the same goals in life?

  Yeah! They just wanna be comfy, and loved, and make good music together. Everything to do and build together is towards that shared goal.

14) Do they trust each other? Why or why not?

  They do.   Margie’s a given, she trusts everyone.

  Raf, though, has vacillated pretty wildly between wanting to trust her by trying to brute force fake that trust until he believed it–and not trusting her at all. However, the morning she basically returned from the dead to come shambling back home to him in one piece–cemented his trust in her. He thought she had died and, in her concussed state, she was just sorry that she took so long to get back, and wanted to know if they can still play music together. He still has hiccups and moments of panic about the honesty of her relationship with him and such–but so long as he can recall the sheer relief he felt when he held her, and the absolute heartbreak she delivered to him thereafter by way of concussed murmerings–it’s irrefutable to him that she loves him very dearly and that she’ll always be there. Come hell or literal high-water.

15) Is one of them keeping secrets from the other? Why? How would they react if the secret was revealed?

  Not anymore, no.   Initially, Raf had only explained to Margie that he had PTSD. All of his paranoid behaviours and such were swept under that as their explanation. Once things had become quite a bit more serious between the two of them, Raf’s Uncle asserted that Margie was eventually gonna have to know about and understand the challenges of his paranoid personality disorder. And after some gentle coaxing about that, Raf finally relented to ask his uncle to talk to Margie about it for him–because if it was left to Raf to do it himself, it wouldn’t…go well, if it ever happened at all.

  Margie had dated a guy with schizophrenia during her time in Winnipeg, and so there wasn’t really a big scary stigma that needed to be dispelled. The schizophrenia of her previous relationship had been such a non-issue compared to what she otherwise might have expected, that it maybe gave her the idea that Raf’s PD would similarly pose no major challenges. Eehhhh…she was a little off base with that assumption, but she got up to speed on all of it eventually, and it’s mostly fine. At the very least, it didn’t change her opinion of Raf at all, and any drama that accompanied the reveal was hosted exclusively in Raf’s poor brain. 

16) Are they keeping a secret together? How do they feel about that?

  Yeah lmao Raf’s PD is no one’s business but their own. Of the people still alive, Margie, Nels, and his therapist (and Tess) are the only people who are aware of Raf’s PD. The rest of the guys at Hi-Note know he has PTSD, but that’s it. 

17) Do they view their relationship as temporary or permanent?

  Use to be temporary, until the temporary part of their relationship was almost exercised–and now it’s as permanent as a relationship can be lmao

18) Are they satisfied with their relationship? Do they wish they were closer/more distant?

  There’s always things they are working towards together, but they’re both very happy with their relationship, generally.

19) What is their best memory together?

  Oh nooo there’s so much lmfao. I think they both look back on their first year in Cortes Island very very fondly–as kind of a turning point where their lives together became a pretty ironclad thing. It was forged in fire the entire year prior, and they stuck it through–and suddenly things were easy and calm and nice again, and it just…strengthened everything quite beautifully. 

20) What is their worst memory together?

That whooole year before they arrived in Cortes Island lmao. Uncle Bills death and dealing with his estate was the most difficult test their relationship will even endure, I think.

21) When were they the most vulnerable with each other?

  Hm, this is hard, they’re vulnerable with each other pretty well all the time. Again though, the most vulnerable moments were probably during that year of grieving and dealing with Bill’s estate. Raf had basically hit a melting point and was largely incapacitated for much of the latter half, and it culminated with Margie admitting she couldn’t take care of things like he needed her to. I think they both thought the other was gonna leave, because things had stopped being fun and enjoyable, and they couldn’t carry each other out of it or provide what the other person obviously needed. Raf was just waiting for Margie to get sick and tired enough to walk, but Margie was wrecking herself on the terror that he would feel irreparably let down by her if she failed to adequately carry his burden for him when he needed her the most. In the end, Margie’s breakdown and her fear of not being and doing enough for him is what galvanized Raf to get his shit together just enough to put some real, physical distance between them and all the garbage that had piled up on them. A move that Margie had suggested months earlier, but Raf had been too stubborn/overwhelmed to properly consider at the time.

22) Do they have any mutual friends? Mutual enemies?

 All of Raf’s friends are Margie’s friends (he only really has two aside from her and Tess)–but not all of Margie’s friends are Raf’s friends. No mutual enemies, either. Solely because Margie doesn’t have anyone she’d describe as an enemy haha. Maybe Raf’s mom…but Margie has never met her, so it feels weird. She greatly dislikes everything she’s heard about the woman, though.

23) How do these two interact with each other in public versus in private?

 In public, you might think they’re just really close friends. Margie and Raf don’t engage in any explicitly romantic displays of affection in public–largely because Raf is very uncomfortable about it.

 In private, they’re in each other’s space a lot of the time, and fill silences with the occasional sappy call-and-responses that are all some shade of “guess what?” “what?” “I love you.” “Woah, I love you too–weird!” Sometimes the words they string together to carry this sentiment between each other are absolute nonsense…but they know what it means. They’re also just very content to be in the same room together, quietly doing their own thing and otherwise ignoring each other in perfect comfort.

24) If a stranger saw them together, how would they describe their relationship?

 “They seem like really good friends! They’re working together quite well!”

25) How would these characters react to being stuck in a small room with each other?

  Stuck? Well…They’d try to figure out what the deal is. And if it’s like…a busted elevator situation or something, Raf wouldn’t pause for levity until the situation was under control. But once it’s just a matter of waiting for things to become unstuck again, He and Margie would sit in each other's space and pass the time musing and joking to one another. They just enjoy each other’s company, generally.

26) How far would they go for each other? Would they risk their own lives for each other? 

  Margie would crawl out of Davy Jones's coldest locker for Raf lmao

  Raf would walk into oncoming traffic for Margie.

  But more than that, both of them would endeavor to live their healthiest, happiest lives for each other.