#seduce me james smut

[alcamcat]

what do u think the seduce me boys' fav kinks & positions are? — 🍗

Hey there, since I'm working on a post about their favorite positions already, I'll just answer the question about her kinks here. Keep in mind that this is my personal opinion and not everyone may agree to my choice.

Warning: smut – Minors DNI

-I don't own the game or the characters-

James:

James is definitely into bondage and light bdsm. He loves to be in control and lives this out in his sex life. He particularly likes to restrain his partner, be it with a tie, a scarf or something similar. Having such power over the other, seeing them whimper and fall apart beneath him turns him on. For him, this also means that his partner trusts him. That they submit to him in the bedroom, even if the person is otherwise rather confident. Contrary to some beliefs, he doesn't have a daddy kink. Neither brother is turned on by being called daddy - after all, their association with the topic of father is beyond bad, so they can't find this kink arousing even apart from their memories.

Erik:

When it comes to sex, Erik has a sort of voice kink and also a penchant for edging. It turns him on to hear his partner moan and whimper. Knowing that he's the one who can get them into that kind of ecstasy and elicit every little sound of pleasure from them gives him satisfaction. Always keen to give his partner maximum pleasure, heavy breathing and moans are confirmation that he's doing everything right. When it comes to himself, he likes edging. He likes it when his partner edges him and he experiences the climax much more intensely after a few times. Through his past, he has a lot of experience in the sexual field and has tried many things. For this reason, edging is perfect for him, because he experiences his own orgasm stronger, deeper and more intense because he longed for it.

Sam:

Sam tends to have a light breeding kink, albeit unconsciously and he is really fond of outdoor sex. His breeding kink is not very strong, but he is very proud of his maternal lineage, proud of being a demon and even if he is not very aware of it himself, he would like to continue his legacy at some point. Outwardly, he just likes to cum inside his partner and to fill them to the brim. Sam doesn't really realize that the idea of having an heir is simmering under the facade. However, he himself is well aware that he has a strong fondness for having sex outdoors. He likes the adrenaline and the thrill that builds up because there is a risk of getting caught. This is all the more surprising since he doesn't like audience at all and sex is something very personal for him.

Matthew:

It probably won't surprise anyone, but Matthew has a roleplay kink (Kitty Play) in which he takes the dominant part. There is also the tendencies of a breeding kink in him, which he is quite aware of, in contrast to his brother. His roleplay kink conveys a certain playfulness and lightness, he immerses himself in his roles and manages to embody them perfectly without losing sight of the lust and pleasure of him and his partner. When his partner wants to get him lose his cool, leaning in and purring in his ear is often enough. However, they should never do this in public because when Matthew is feeling edgy he tends to get really rough. However, like his other brothers, he would never actually hurt or harm his partner. He likes to cum deep inside his partner and the thought of carrying on his legacy usually makes him want to go for a second round right away.

Damien:

Damien definitely has a slight praise kink. Unfortunately, his ability to read minds also plays a part in his kinks. Since he always heard the thoughts of the other demons around him in the castle, he developed a penchant for voyeurism. However, it's a slightly different form of voyeurism for him, as it manifests itself as turning him on when he hears his partner's sexual fantasies and ideas in their mind. A bonus point is when his partner masturbates in front of him while thinking about sexual adventures they wants to have with him. After a few minutes he will definitely do more than just watch and as far as he can he will make their fantasies come true. When they have dirty thoughts about him in public, he quickly blushes and suddenly feels an urgent need to get home as soon as possible. When his partner praises him and brags about how good he is in bed, it will push his libido to new heights.

[indescribeable]

Wait for your love I Chapter 1

So I made a post about this fic a WHILE ago now but I finally got around to writing the first chapter! This will be cross-posted on Ao3 if anyone would rather read it there! I really hope you guys like this and based on reactions and my motivation well lack there off we will see how this goes. This fic will also contain a few OC's Also, I know I keep saying this but to those who have asks still pending I am SO SORRY I just haven't had the motivation but I'm sure a lot of you feel me on that one ALSO TRIGGER WARNING this fic will eventually include smut and will explore topics of abuse, PTSD and non-con and eating disorders I will put lines like this ~~~~~~~~ above and below chapters that contain those subjects so please be aware of this! <3 Anyway hope you enjoy Also Yes Wait for Your Love by Ariana is at the bottom of this post as I got my inspiration for the fic itself and the title while listening to the song so I hope you enjoy it! <3

Mika had been through a lot of hardships in her life her father’s constant abuse, Lisette’s constant abuse, Andrew's constant abuse, the depression, the PTSD, the eating disorder and anxiety, the loss of her grandmother, the loss of her grandfather and even the trauma that came from finding 5 men bleeding on the floor of her newly bequeathed mansion and then that leading to being kidnapped and almost killed by a psychotic devil and then following that up with an incredibly angry succubus trying to take her boys away from her but this, this was harder. Watching the five men she had grown to love and adore in this world find their love with others. It had been just over 2 years since she had met the boys and only a few weeks into their stay with her she started to develop feelings for all of them that she hid incredibly well even from Damien and he could read minds. Weeks turned into months, months of pain being so deeply in love but watching them drift away, watching them each find someone they loved with their entire being, months of giving advice and reassurance that they in fact could love and that they had nothing to worry about, months of helping them plan dates, helping them solve arguments, helping them pick out gifts and then eventually engagement rings and wedding tuxedos all while slowing dying inside her heart shattering into a million little pieces.

When they each left to move on with her life she stayed strong. She put on a happy face, wished them all the happiness in the world and let them go until she was alone. The house felt so empty without them it was something she couldn’t bear anymore all she was doing was spiralling into self-pity and depression so she decided that if they moved on she needed to as well. Since James the eldest of the five brothers had taken over her grandfather’s company her father had no choice but to let her choose to do whatever she wished with her life. It was something she would be forever grateful for, so she focused on something she loved that helped her get her mind off everything. Mika had been taking dance lessons since before she can remember much to her father's dismay but to appease him she kept straight A’s a 4.0 GPA and took part in whatever ridiculous company events he wished along with taekwondo lessons, her grandfather also paid for all her dance lessons so that helped but her father was never 100% satisfied, he let her continue her lessons so that was something. After high school, she had managed to get full scholarships to multiple universities but the offer that shook her the most was her full-ride scholarship to Julliard the only problem being it was in New York. Sure she had received scholarships from some of the best dance schools in the country even from schools in Chicago but she had a choice to make. The boys or her future, she was beginning to reach her limit.

The boys obviously had no idea about how she felt about them though they did love her but like a sister. As such she was invited to every event, every meal and it was getting harder and harder to sit there and endure the torment of seeing them so happy with their wives not to mention she was the only one who seemed to notice how much they seemed to hate her bar Twila who was quiet yes but friendly and honestly incredibly sweet the perfect match for Damien and that hurt even more. Each new event was becoming more and more uncomfortable for her so she decided to accept the Juilliard offer if she was going to make it through the rest of her life she needed to get away. The boys were devastated upon finding out that she was moving away but were ultimately happy for her and wished her luck. The worst part was the smug look on the wives' faces at the airport as she left and the tearful hugs shared between her and the boys but as she left she willed herself not to look back she couldn’t because if she did she would never have been able to leave so now hear she sat in her last year of university in one of the most magical cities in the world sure she was incredibly homesick and still missed the boys like crazy but she didn’t realise when she left for New york how deeply in love she would fall in over the city.

It was getting close to Christmas so there was constant snowfall the city constantly changing between being covered in a white blanket of snow and brown and grey slush from all the foot traffic that came through it every day. Her dorm room was so nice heating and AC, crisp white walls though they were covered head to toe in posters and pictures, a lovely plush beige carpet, large bay windows looking out over the city and a decent amount of room considering the room was shared. Mika took the left side while her roommate Jada took the right. Mika was so nervous moving in and meeting her the first day but she turned out to be one of the warmest, kind and honestly badass people she had ever met. They were both vastly different but they managed to somehow get along incredibly well, Mika had a Japanese American background while Jada had an African American background, they both had very different tastes in everything from food to music but it was what they loved about each other they where honestly like each others missing halves in a way and Mika was beyond grateful for her. They spoke about anything and everything literally of course them both being witches helped that but Jada knew everything about Mika and her situation and let's just say Mika fears the day Jada ever meets the guys It’s incredibly fair to say she was not best pleased with the whole situation.

Mika was currently sitting at one of the windows in her dorm snuggled up under a fluffy blanket wearing a light brown teddy bear fleece paired with fur-lined black leggings, miss matched black and white fluffy socks and her hair was up in a loose bun. She was content happily cupping a steaming mug of hot chocolate in her hands watching the small puffs of snow flying past her window. Thankfully her ankle was now out of its cast but it still wasn't 100% yet after what happened.

Mika thanks to her father's treatment never allowed herself to rest she was always pushing herself trying to be what she believed was good enough though she’s never actually got to the point where she thought that she was enough. She had been skipping meals, overworking herself and pushing herself beyond her limits, Jada always liked to say one day she would end up working herself to death and to be fair she wasn't far off being correct in that assumption. Mika ended up truly pushing herself too far over the edge this time ultimately fainting in practice and breaking her ankle, she didn't know what was worse though a dancer hurting their ankle now causing them to have a constant weakness in their ankle broken or not or the fact that she did it 3 months before her final showcase, the showcase was basically the most important event in her life right now there would be scouts from multiple dance companies around the world coming to watch the performances, she needed to be there and she needed to be the best for her future career, the pressure was on but she could still say she was at least somewhat happy, this was something she had been dreaming of since she was a little girl and she would stop at nothing to get to the finish line if not just for her but her grandfather as well. He had been so supportive and put in so much work to help her pursue everything she wanted in life, dance her magic studies even her regular studies, the worst thing she could dream of would be letting him down and that would not be an option for her.

Before tears could start forming in her eyes over the memories of her grandfather she heard the lock to the door go before revealing a very cold and very displeased Jada. Her light blonde curly hair was shoved up in a messy ponytail the platinum locks matching incredibly well with her milk chocolate skintone. Her dark whiskey eyes were set in an unimpressed scowl though not directed at anyone in particular. Her large white puffer jacket black jeans and snow boots were covered in small flakes and her rosy cheeks were shining brightly in the light of the dormroom. Mika had to stifle a giggle at her very distressed and very dishevelled roommate.

“Someone doesn't look happy” Mika couldn't help the teasing smirk appearing on her lips.

“I HATE winter! It’s cold! And wet! And it's doing nothing for my hair!” Jada huffed the last few words struggling to rip the drenched puffer jacket off her slender frame eventually giving up sighing in defeat and blowing a stray curl out of her eyes.

“A little help over here!?” Mika chuckled before placing down her hot chocolate and untangling herself from the warmth of her blanket making her way over to help her friend escape the drenched jacket hanging it up to dry in the bathroom. Finally having escaped the offending clothing item Jada flopped onto her bed tiredly turning her head to look at Mika who had returned to her place at the window hot chocolate nestled back between her slender fingers.

“How's the ankle? Any improvements?” Mika turned to look at her in response a small smile on her face though there was still sadness in her eyes.

“It's getting there it hardly hurts when I put pressure on it anymore and I've almost completely regained my balance.”

Jada’s face lit up with one of her signature warm smiles her eyes slightly creasing at the corners. “Way to go girl! Im proud of you, you put in a lot of work but I still say you need a break” Mika scoffed turning her attention back to the window.

“I don't have time for a break the showcase is in just over a month and im completely behind on my practice not to mention that I haven't even been able to attend practice to watch the routine I planned out because Miss Sharp insisted I stay on “bed rest”.

Jada let out an exasperated sigh sitting up on her bed before getting up and making her way over to sit across from Mika at the window shoving her legs under the blanket with Mika and gently grabbing her hand with a serious look on her face.

“Look Meeks I love you, you know I do but the whole reason you are in this mess is because you weren't taking care of yourself, even if your ankle fully heals within the next few hours you still won't be ready physically to come back to practice, look you have already choreographed and planned out the entire show and Aiko and I have made sure everything is how you want it to be. You need a break. I think you should go home for Christmas.”

Mika looked as if she had been struck eyes wide in fear, Jada of course knew everything about the boys and that whole situation they had become so close to each other that they basically knew all of each other's secrets and she knew how hard it had been for Mika.

“Are you insane?! There is no way im going home.” Mikas face softened from surprised to sad “I can't do it, Jada, it hurts too much.”

Jada let out a sad sigh before lightly squeezing Mika's hand with hers. “Look I know that it's hard for you but you can't keep avoiding them forever even if they seem to be avoiding you.” The last part of that sentence was spoken with icy venom, Mika had tried to get in contact with the boys multiple times but the calls either ended up going to voice mail or somehow the boy's wives always ended up answering, she had tried their house phones, personal phones even work phones but she could never get through. It saddened her not getting to hear their voices, there were times during her stay at uni when she really needed them, needed to hear them, needed to hear their reassurance and the warmth in their voices but she was never successful.

“Girl look first things first you miss home, you miss Naomi and Suzu heck you even miss the little cafe you always used to go to, you wouldn’t just be going to see them, you can't let their dumb ass decisions rule your life plus you might be able to figure out what the hell is going on, based on everything you’ve told me I wouldn’t think they would treat you like this and that means a lot coming from me based on the way I feel about them” Jada emphasized the last bit of her sentence causing a light chuckle to pass through Mikas lips.

Mika set down her hot chocolate for the second time reaching over to give Jada a tight squeeze which was reciprocated immediately. “What would I do without you?”

Jada chuckled before responding. “I don't think either of us would like to find out the answer to that question but im gonna take that as a yes?” She finished her question with a hopeful lilt to her voice.

Mika untangled herself from Jada’s arms sitting back and giving her a gentle nod and warm smile. “Yes, I'll go home already geez I didn't realise you were that desperate to get rid of me.” At that, Jada gave Mika a light punch to the arm causing Mika to lean back rubbing her arm and feigning a hurt expression.

“Ohh, please! I didn't even hit you hard!” Both girls chuckled at finally separating for the night.

Jada headed into the bathroom to get ready for bed and Mika making her way over to her desk flipping open her laptop the blue light of the screen illuminating her face a few seconds after the power button was pressed. She searched through multiple sites for affordable plane tickets for what felt like hours, unfortunately, everything went up in price around Christmas time so it was exceedingly hard to find the ticket she wanted for a fair price. Eventually, though she managed to find the ticket she wanted at a fairly reasonable price, well as reasonable as it was gonna get at that time of year quickly purchasing them waiting for the confirmation email and then shutting her laptop and heading to bed for the night. Nerves raced through her body at the thought of going home but finally, she drifted off nervous for the days to come.

[espinosaurusrexex]

Celeste

FallenAngel!BuckyBarnes x Female!Reader AU

summary: Heaven is not what they tell you. The celestials don’t live in harmony and the devil is not as far as you might think. He’s vicious in his ways to seduce every being - makes even the mighty fall from grace. And one of them happens to be your guardian angel. When James is banished from the heavens, he is forced to amend his sins on earth. What did he do wrong, you might ask? Well, he fell for the one he watched over.

a/n: I thought I’ve read a FallenAngel!Bucky fic on here before. But I couldn’t find it. So please, if you know it, tag me. Anyway, this is my take on the au.

word count: 20.3k (good lord, someone take my computer away)

warnings: this might offend some people (remember this is my fantasy world - I don’t know much about angels and the whole shebang), soulmate trope, the devil, also God?, jealousy/envy, mentions of killing and abuse, banishment and punishments, he falls first (literally lmao), fluff and wholesomeness, agony, angst (of course, with happy end!), smut (wingplay, Bucky‘s got heavenly dick, Virgin!Bucky, size kink, cum play) !MINORS DNI!

ﾟ✫ 𝒎𝒂𝒊𝒏 𝒎𝒂𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒍𝒊𝒔𝒕 ｡✭･ﾟ✶ 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅 𝒐𝒏 𝐀𝐎𝟑 ✧*･ﾟ𝒄.𝒂𝒊 ｡✭･ﾟ

all image credit goes to @animarvelita on TikTok (there's more at the end)

James.

Wake up, James.

Wake up!

The wind hits his lashes before he opens his eyes. He’s falling. He’s falling and there’s nothing he can do. 

❁ ❁ ❁

It’s eerie outside, you note as your towel glides over the countertop. The entire window of the diner displays dark clouds. Dark clouds that will soon bring the heavy rain Old Lee has been mumbling about for days now. 

Not too many people believe what the crazy farmer says but you can’t help but notice how much he really understands of the world. 

Nick hits the little golden bell by the serving hatch and you take the fresh sandwiches to a table by the door. 

“Anything else I can get you?”

“We’re good, honey.”

You just nod as your eyes stay focused on the small parking lot outside. You wipe your hands on your apron and return to the counter when the first drop of rain hits the window pane.

❁ ❁ ❁

Branches are aching beneath his weight when he crashes through the trees. A deep thud echoes in the woods as his body hits the ground. It’s raining. 

Every tragedy needs rain.

❁ ❁ ❁

"Are you alright, dear?" Peggy, one of the regulars, a wise old lady, asks and points to your hand that's settled above your chest. 

You clear your throat. "I'm fine. Just a frog in my throat." You nod with a tight smile. Something seems to have knocked the air out of your lungs. But you've been feeling like you are coming down with something for a few days now. 

"Must be the weather," Howard comment's next to Peggy, and his newspaper crumbles beneath his touch. 

You turn and refill their coffee mugs. "Yeah... must be." But you can't shake the feeling it has brought to you. 

"It's always the weather." Peggy nods before the door to the diner opens and Old Lee enters, his muddy boots dirtying the checkered floors. You scrunch your nose. You'd be the one cleaning that up later, Scott surely won't do it. 

"This ain't a normal April storm, folks." His hat tips before he sits at the counter in front of you. "You look like you’ve been trampled by a cow.”

"It's just the weather," you say and place a cup of hot tea in front of him. That's just Stan: brutally honest and strangely right about everything. 

❁ ❁ ❁

Pain is strange. His feet get caught in the thorned bushes. Golden blood is the only evidence of his path.

And it’s slowly turning black.

❁ ❁ ❁

The storm outside intensifies, the rain hammering against the diner's windows with an unrelenting force. Old Lee's words linger in the air, stirring a sense of unease among the patrons. You glance outside, noticing the darkness creeping in as if it's swallowing everything in its path.

A shiver runs down your back as you remember how much Pietro would have loved this storm. Your mind drifts back to the memory of him. He always found solace in the chaos of nature, seeing beauty even in the fiercest storms.

But he's is gone now, lost to you in a way that is irreversible. The ache in your chest intensifies as you try to push away the memories, focusing instead on your tasks at hand.

Stan’s voice is low and gravelly when he murmurs again. "You can't outrun the storm, kid. It's coming for all of us, whether we're ready or not."

His words are chilling, but you shake it off, forcing a smile as you refill his tea. 

"We'll weather this storm just like we always do." Peggy chimes in as her hand lands on yours with her calming touch. But your heart is hammering in your chest, still. Something feels off. As if a piece fell out of place, waiting to be discovered, and raving to make a mess. 

❁ ❁ ❁

It’s cold and muddy here, no comfort in sight. But he’ll venture on until he reaches you. His soul is pulled to your very presence. 

He needs to find you. Needs to amend his wrongs. Though is it really wrong to love?

❁ ❁ ❁

It’s dark out when you hang your apron in your locker and wave a short goodbye to Nick. Pulling your coat tightly around you in an attempt to brace yourself for the wind, you step outside into the deluge. The rain lashes against your skin, soaking you to the bone on your walk through deserted streets and cold concrete. 

You sigh thinking about everyone that made it home dry, probably sitting in their beds right now, watching the rain roll down their window pane with a hot cup of cocoa in hand. 

But that seems to postpone itself, you realize as you abruptly halt. You look around. This isn’t your usual route home. But something pulled you off your intended path and toward an unfamiliar alleyway. Confusion mingles with a strange sense of anticipation as you find yourself drawn deeper into the darkness. 

Your head is screaming at you. This is dangerous. You shouldn’t be doing this. Why are your feet moving anyway?

And then you see it. Or rather... him?

A figure stands at the end of the alley, obscured by shadows and rain, but there's something about him that sets your heart racing.

"Hello?" you call out tentatively, your voice barely audible over the storm. You hate how weak you sound. 

He steps forward into the dim light, his features illuminated by a flickering streetlamp. Dark hair and a strong yaw, wide muscular shoulders, his arms are adorned by silver cuffs. His whole being is well over six feet. But he seems even taller as something wide reaches from behind him, almost hugging his shoulders and prodding up towards the sky. He steps forward again and your breath hitches in your throat when you can finally make out the grey feathery wings standing from behind his back.

But you don’t run. You don’t even stumble back. Your feet are frozen to the ground. Then his eyes meet yours, and for a moment, time seems to stand still as you’re caught in the intensity of his gaze. 

“I’ve been searching for you,” he says, his voice almost like a whisper to the wind. Calling and marvelous. 

Everything inside you tells your how absurd this situation is. How fast you should be running anywhere but here right now. But the way your heart races doesn’t feel like fear. In fact, you’re not even scared. More fascinated, awestruck, intrigued. You know he wont hurt you. 

“I don’t know you.” You manage to stammer, your eyes still locked with his. The tension overwhelming and electrifying all at once.

“That should be obvious.” He points to his wings smiling amused, a smile that you know holds a universe of secrets and promises. You want to learn them all, you catch yourself thinking as your eyes slip to his lips. 

“I don’t understand.”

“You don’t need to understand,” he replies and it’s the first time his wings move behind him. “Just trust that we are connected in ways you cannot even begin to imagine.”

“Well?” You clear your throat and cross your arms in front of your chest, relieved your body is able to move again, though the pose feels rather awkward. “Why are you here?”

He seems shocked for a moment, as if he hadn’t expected you to play along so fast. And, to be honest, neither did you... at least a little. 

“I need to...” His mouth falls shut again and he turns his head down to the side, shoulders heaving. “I guess I need a place to stay.”

“With me?” That’s insane. You know it is. But why does it not surprise you? 

He nods, you shake your head. “I cant just accommodate a...” You gesture to him and he clears his throat awkwardly. 

“Angel.”

“Right, of course.” You chuckle as you scan his body again. Only now do you see the torn clothes and bloody feet. Drenched through and through. 

You sigh. “I don’t even know your name...” 

His eyes are sparkling, the smallest of twitches making him look a little softer, tangible even. You’re not afraid of him. And it messes with your head. You should be scared, right? But all there is in your body is the steady tingle pinging from your heart back to your stomach. 

“It’s James.” His smile is handsome when he reaches out his hands, offering you a better look to his toned arms.

Whywhywhy? “Alright.” 

❁ ❁ ❁

James looks out of place in your rather small living room. His size dwarves every piece of furniture carefully picked out to make your house a home. He makes it look like a doll house just by standing in it. 

But he doesn’t seem to care. James ducks when he passes through the door and you watch his feathers ruffle as they press themselves to his back in order to fit through. 

You’re not sure what to do. Never in your life did you think you would end up in a situation like this. There is no protocol for hosting celestial beings. Though a how to angel dinner party guide would come in handy now. Did he even eat?

Something must be wrong with you. You let a total stranger into your house, even though your track record of people skills is not exactly the best. One that is borderline freakishly tall and has wings. Wings that look soft and beautiful. But strong and kind of intimidating as well. But why does he feel so safe?

“You’re staring.” James notes and a handsome grin spreads across his face. 

“I’m not really used to having angels in my house to be honest.” The sarcasm is dripping from your tone in subtle undertones. But James seems to enjoy it. “Why are you here? On earth... I mean.”

He stares at the ceiling and his wings sag a little. “I have a mission, dearest.” He tells and his eyes meet yours. They’re deep blue and stormy - just like the sky. You can see yourself falling lost in them. His presence is all-consuming, making you shiver. It reminds you that the both of you are drenched from the rain. A puddle has formed around your feet and James’s wings guide the water droplets to your hardwood floor in two perfect circles. His hair is curling at the ends, in the nape of his neck and the water is also running down his throat, pooling in the remains of his shirt. 

“What mission?”

“I cannot tell you yet.” 

You nod, even though you don’t understand. But you don’t want to pressure him. “Do you need a shower? Or... clean clothes?” The second you ask you feel stupid. It’s silly right? Why shouldn’t angels shower? 

Then again, the way he looks at you is one of surprise. “Yes, that would be good.” 

“Good. Yes.” With a sigh you flee through the hallway to your room in search for some clothes. 

❁ ❁ ❁

A shower. James is giddy. Human things have always excited him. He has been watching from the heavens for eons, never truly experienced them quite like this. But he’s intrigued. Especially when you offer them to him like he’s not an intruder in your life. 

If things were different, you would never know he even existed. But James is guilty of happiness that he gets to meet you in person. 

Up close, you’re even more perfect. You smell nice, your home feels cozier than anything he’s ever experienced, and your voice sounds just a sliver more comforting when its directed at him. 

He is smiling like a fool, standing in your living room - the one he knows by heart but so much more personal now. And when you return to him with a pile of grey cloth, his heart skips a beat. You bring him the familiar warmth that made him fall in the first place. But having you within an arm’s length makes all of it feel worth it. 

There is not an ounce of regret in him for being here.

Electricity shoots up his arm when you touch his hand. It’s cold and wet - he immediately vows to always keep you warm from now on - makes it his purpose to have you be comfortable for the rest of your life. 

You lead him to the bathroom, grinning sheepishly when you gesture toward your shower. 

“It might be a tight squeeze.” You point at the glass surrounding your bathtub. “But it’s all I can offer.”

“It will do just fine.” He reassures you. 

“I will leave you to it then.” James is confused.

“Are you not staying?”

“Sorry?”

“To help me.”

“Help you... shower?” There is hesitance in your tone, but James truly doesn’t know how to turn the thing on.

“Well, yes.”

“I...” Your eyes are big, staring up at him through surprise and nervousness. “I don’t want to intrude. Give you some privacy to- oh.”

His clothes are already on the floor. He knows this much. Shower is something one does naked. But you seem to be shocked when his whole body is revealed to you. Do you like it? James is sure he looks as close to a human as a person with wings can. So why are you still staring at his stomach?

His eyes catch yours as they move a little lower, your eyebrows raising just that much higher and a smirk places itself on his face. So, you do like what you see. He confirms silently. Not that he particularly knows why. He never noticed people by their bodies - only their soul, because that is the important thing - the one that never changes. 

And yours is the most enchanting of them all. 

❁ ❁ ❁

You watch as James sit’s down on the opposite end of the sofa. He’s declined every offer you have made for him to feel a little more welcome. But he seems content. His smile hasn’t left his lips ever since you led him to the bathroom.

You couldn’t help but notice his body when he revealed it all  to you. It’s like every inch of him is carved by the gods. He looks soft in the right parts, strong enough not to be skinny with his height. And his male parts. Well, they look more than satisfactory. 

You felt like a pervert staring him up and down while he stood there with this kind of proud innocence to him, wondering if he understood how proud he could be of his looks. There is so much you don’t know about him. It’s not like you haven’t talked. 

You have. But he speaks in riddles. 

“You are staring again.” James notes and you immediately snap your head elsewhere. 

“I’m just figuring this situation out, I guess.”

He smiles encouragingly. “You can ask questions. I imagine you’ve been eager to know more.”

You exhale long, taking courage to look him in the eyes. “And you will answer all of them honestly?”

“Honestly, yes.” His teeth find his bottom lip and you squeeze your thighs together.  “I cannot promise to answer them all.”

“Okay.”

“Good.”

A comfortable silence settles between you as you think of the first thing you could ask him. Maybe you should get the most obvious one out of the way. Maybe you should ask him more about himself, though you’re not sure how personal he can get if he spent his entire life in heaven. You just assume there is too much to do to pursue actual hobbies and such. 

“Is there a God?”

“Starting with the light questions, I see.” You just look at him with intrigue. Already lining up all the other questions no-one else in this world has the opportunity to have answered. James sighs and then nods. “Yes, God exists.”

“Do you know God?”

He hesitates, his eyes fleeting to the end of the room and then back to you. “Yes.”

“Why did that answer take you so long?”

His jaw tenses and his eyes find the floor as if he was cursing himself for offering this situation. But then again, you haven’t heard him cuss once. Maybe you’re wrong. “It was under rather... unfortunate circumstances.” 

You nod as if you understand. But you can only imagine. “So, he’s like the big boss, only getting involved when things escalate?”

James looks caught, his wings draw in closer. After a moment, he clears his throat and his feathers ruffle with a small shake. “First of all, it’s she/they. And second, ... I guess you could say that, yes.”

“I knew it.” You grin as the pride washes over you at this information. “Why did she never correct us?”

“Let’s just say mankind doesn’t have a great track record of enforcing things that go against their believe... Not that it would be believable if someone told the story of meeting an angel who told them God is a woman.”

“Fair point. That person would have probably been burnt alive.” You nod again, crossing your legs and turning to him on the sofa. James takes a moment to rake his eyes over your body, making you feel tingles all over. You clear your throat. “Speaking of torture... Why do we have war and world hunger?”

“Please do not take this the wrong way. Those are issues that very much concern God or anyone that want’s the best for her people, but she’s busy. She manages everything else that has gone south since.”

“Since what?” You partly enjoy the way James talks to you as if you are an insider, but you only understand half of what he’s saying. 

“Since she and Lucifer had a big fallout.” He shrugs, but it just adds to your confusion.

“I’m not following.”

He rolls his eyes as if it were your fault you don’t know about this supernatural fight. “They had a disagreement. Lucifer’s response to God’s proposal was an ill-conceived frivolity which ended up becoming the patriarchy.” 

To say you’re stunned is a serious understatement. “You’re telling me the devil threw a tamper tantrum and that’s why we have inequality? How did he even do that?”

James shakes his head. “...Yes. The trial is still in progress. But it may be calming to know that we have not figured out exactly how he convinced an entire species of males being the stronger part of it.”

“No, James. It is not calming to know.” You sigh and watch as he clasps his hands in his lap, his cuffs glistening in the lamplight. God, they’re big. You immediately scold yourself for thinking this, feeling weirds as the words of your mother echo in your head ‘Don’t you dare use God’s name in vain’. “What exactly has God done since then?”

The smile returns to his face and you readjust yourself on the sofa. “Oh, you wouldn’t want to know how this world would look if she hadn’t kept busy with sorting it.”

Your nose wrinkles in a frown, as you check the points off in your head. “I really don’t think it can get that much worse. Climate change, mass genocides, what else could there be?” You nod at each one just as James lifts up his fingers and opens his mouth as if he is starting to count. 

But you stop him. “Please don’t.”

“Yes, that is probably for the best.”

It is silent for a moment as you try to process all the information you have just attained. It is a rather weird feeling. Knowing you know what no-one else on earth does and not being able to tell. Knowing there will be no-one believing you. 

You sigh when your head starts spinning from how crazy this day has been. James seems to be rather relaxed considering he barely knows you. His dark hair falls around his face perfectly, the back of it forming a cute curl in the nape of his neck and your fingers itch to touch it.

But you refrain, reminding yourself that he is a stranger - and an angel. Beside the fact that he has not once reached out to you, just randomly touching his hair would probably be the weirdest thing to do right now. 

“Can I ask you something?” He suddenly breaks the silence and you shoot a thank you to the sky for saving yourself from going down the mental rabbit hole of how soft his hair looks. 

“Yes.”

“Why did you take me in?” James’s eyes are boring into yours so innocently. If it weren’t for the giant wings on his back, he would almost look like a normal clueless and incredibly cute guy. And yet he just revealed outerworldly gossip as if you were discussing the latest celebrity TMZ. 

“I-“ you trail off, thinking about it for a while. You aren’t sure how much you can tell him. But James has been genuine from the start. It wold only be fair to do the same. “I felt like you needed me.”

A weird feeling takes over your body suddenly. Like a warm flush rushing through you. James fidgets in your peripheral and nods in understanding. “I did. I do.”

It’s like the reality of it all hits you like brick when a noise sounds from outside and his wings twitch, pushing over a pile of books on the cupboard behind the sofa. This is not normal, something tells you, and yet your stomach flutters in a way that feels a lot like butterflies. Everything about James is fascinating to you. You constantly fight the urge to reach out and brush your fingertips over every part of him. And for some reason, your mind tries to tell you that he would let you. 

“Why are you really here, James?” You voice is only a whisper when the rattling outside subsides. It’s probably a raccoon or something. But James looks a little nervous all of a sudden. 

“I’m afraid that is one thing I cannot tell you, love.”

You sigh. “I guess... I just want to help. Having you stay here doesn’t feel like it’s enough. There has got to be something you need to do.”

“That is very kind of you. I admire your bravery and openness.” His lips spread into a smile, his hand lifting from his lap as if he is about to place it on yours, but his fingers only strech and land back on the sofa between you. “But to be truthful, even if I knew what I had to do, I am not sure wether I would do it or not”

So he is a little deviant. You smile at the small observation. Maybe it’s the reason he is here in the first place. But you feel like you have asked James enough for tonight. Just on cue, a yawn escapes your lips. 

“You should rest. It has been a long day.” 

You nod, rubbing your eyes and rising from the soft cushions. “I have a spare bedroom. You can sleep there.”

“That is fine. I do not sleep.” James shakes his head as he rises with you out of curtesy. With his hands clasped in front of him he looks like a goth painting. 

“What? Never?”

“I am not human, dearest. My body attains energy in different ways.” You shudder again, blaming it on your sleepiness as you rub your arms when another yawn escapes you. 

“Maybe you can tell me about it tomorrow. I am really tired.”

“I will be watching over you.” Your name passes his lips like a song, sending another shiver through you. What the hell is the matter with you. You huff as you catch yourself again. It really never occurred to you how often you referenced to the supernatural... “Take all the rest you can get.”

“Good night, James.” You nod and wave awkwardly.

“Good night.”

You know James’s eyes are only you until you disappear into the hallway. But you cant help but feel safely watched over with him around. 

❁ ❁ ❁

They will find him, and they will send him further from you than he ever was.

❁ ❁ ❁

James hates the days you have to leave for work. He watches you with a sense of longing and resignation, knowing that he must find a way to navigate this separation once again. Though it is necessary he find a way to dodge the inevitable.

It’s the vexing thing about the celestial kingdom. They always leave one to find the laws on their journey. There is no book he could read on earth that could help him here. But he has seen the repercussions of disobedience, felt the weight of his transgressions bearing down on him like a heavy chain.

And yet, as he watches you prepare to leave for work, a sense of desperation gnaws at him from within. He wants to reach out, to beg you to stay, to keep you safe from whatever dangers may lurk beyond the safety of your home.

But he knows he can't. He's bound by duty, by the laws of God that dictate his every move. And so, with a heavy heart, he watches silently as you gather your things and head out the door, leaving him alone once more.

As the door closes behind you, James is left with nothing but the echoes of your footsteps fading into the distance. He knows he should use this time wisely, to prepare for whatever trials may lie ahead, but his thoughts are consumed by you, by the overwhelming need to protect you at all costs.

❁ ❁ ❁

There’s and angel in your home. And he’s so freaking attractive, it’s unfair. 

It has been a week since you found James. And despite the incredibly irrational decisions of yours to invite him into your home, nothing bad has happened to you. Sure, the first night you might have dreamt about him. He’s everything your fantasy books described an more. And you couldn’t help but let that tiny romantic sliver of you hope for the more. 

But James is more pious than any catholic boarding school kid you’ve ever met. 

He seems to enjoy a good joke and he’s quite confident. But he never once touched you. And while that should not be one of your first concerns, considering he’s a stranger and an angel, something inside you tells you he’s holding back. 

He never even flinches when you reach out to him. And the longing stares he sends your way make you shiver with anticipation. Yet there is no attempt to ever pull you in - even though you are so sure you were sending signals. 

Maybe there are no signals in heaven. What are you even saying? Of course there are no signals in heaven. You don’t even believe dating exists up there. 

“Yo, whaddup with ya today? I’ve been calling your name for a solid minute.”

“Sorry. Feeling a little off today,” you mumble to Nick and retrieve the food waiting in the serving hatch. 

“You can’t go home. I don’t wanna serve alone today.”

“Scott, there’s literally no-one here.” You gesture toward the few people sitting in their booths and sigh. “Besides, I never said I was going home.” 

“Don’t get mad. You barely texted me back this week. What’s so awesome about your home when I’m not there with you?” You feel the heat rising to your head at Scott’s comment. “You’d think she’d call me if she ever needed to hide something.” He mumbles to Nick who just laughs and flips a pancake. 

You turn to him with your fists by your side. “The weather is weird and cold, can’t I need a little down time?”

“Not from me!” Scott looks baffled. He’s your friend, and yes, you had other things to worry about than be on your phone this week. But you also knew he wouldn’t understand.

“You’re being a real pain in my ass today, Scotty.”

“Good, so everything’s back to normal then.”

You throw a towel in his face. “Shut up.”

“Cut it out, you two, there’s customers.”

Scott resumes to the back, effectively dodging his work and leaving you to serve the new customer. But your breath hitches in your throat when you look up from the counter.

James is standing in the door, already drawing looks of attention from a few people. He’s smiling back at them, even waving at a child before his eyes meet yours and your heart sets off again. It seems to always do that when he’s close. 

You rush toward him, wrapping your fingers around his cuffed wrist and he audibly exhales. 

“You can’t be here.”

“Why not?”

“Because-“ you lean in closer and James bows down to get his face to your level. “You’re and angel.” You mutter under your breath and the sexy smile returns to his perfect lips. 

“And how would they know that?” His eyebrow raises. 

“You-“ you lean back, examining his shoulders - only then noticing that his wings are not there anymore. “How?”

“I only show myself to truly important people.” He winks and you stumble back a little, his sudden boldness making your legs feel like jello. 

“What are you doing here?” 

James looks around the diner as though he has not planned this far. His eyes swerve to the counter and then back to you. “I want to watch you work. I enjoy spending time with you.”

“But you can’t be here without ordering.”

“Then I will oder.”

“You don’t eat, James. Do you even have money?”

That seems to surprise him. “No.” You shake your head and look at the tiled floor. James’s wrist is still wrapped in your hand but there is no attempt to hold you. So you drop it. Why did he even come here when he won’t touch you?

“Please, beautiful. Let me stay.” His eyes are genuine, his lips purse in a plea. All you can think about is how weirdly lucky you are that this Adonis of a being chose you for his quest. 

You bite your lip and watch him shudder. “Alright. Just sit by the counter and try to be inconspicuous.”

His smile spreads wide. “I’ll be as invisible as the air you breathe.”

You exhale and get back to work but unfortunately, his promise doesn’t last long. Before you know it, Peggy has chosen the seat right beside James. She’s leaning over to him at the counter and Howard just sits beside them with his newspaper in hand - as always. James seems just as invested in the conversation as Peggy and as you steal glances over to the pair of them, insistently hoping he won’t spill about his identity, you catch James’s eyes lingering on you. 

“You are a fine young man, James.” Peggy's hand lands on his, tapping it in a grandmotherly manor, though her eyes are glinting with something akin to longing. She whispers something into his ear you cant make out and James’s eyes shoot to yours, his face tinting rouge from one ear to the other. 

“And you are a remarkable lady, Peggy,” he clears his throat, his mind seemingly wandering elsewhere. “You remind me of a girl a friend of mine was in love with once.”

“Then he must have been the happiest man to ever live.”

Peggy’s hands tremble when she reaches for her cup of tea, her red lipstick taint the white porcelain as James watches her movements with a soft stare. He looks so protective of her, it makes your insides tingle. “He truly is, though he seems like he has forgotten about it lately. Is this your husband?” He gestures to Howard, who just slams the newspaper down in front of him, blank eyes staring at James while Peggy laughs and waves her hand dismissively. 

“This rascal?” She presses her hand to her chest as she tries to calm down. “No, dear. My husband died a long tome ago.” She smiles warmly, floating in melancholy when she continues, “I never loved another man since. He was a heaven sent. Strong, kind, always worked towards the greater good... and his looks were to die for, too.” She winks and James chuckles. 

“Oh I wish a love like that to everyone. Promise me something, James.” 

“Anything.”

“If your find it, never let it go.” Her hand clasps around his biceps, her tone a motherly sternness laced with affection. 

James eyes you again and it feels as if the air is shifting with tension. “My word is in God’s name, Peggy.”

❁ ❁ ❁

James feels the repercussions of his being on earth stronger every day. In heaven, he was miserable because he had to watch you live your life without him. On earth, he’s in agony because he knows, if he ever were to touch you, he would cease to exist.

It’s slanted. He gave up everything coming here and despite the fact that his wings stopped working the second he fell from the sky, he categorizes the uncertainty eating away at him as even worse. Hanging in limbo is more troubling than actually going to hell, he is sure of it. 

He watches you move about your house with the same longing look torturing his features since he realized how much he needed you. It’s laughable how dependent on you he has become. While you go about your life with the minor change of having a roommate, James despises the unforgeable distance heaven has created between you. 

You are friendly with him - you are friendly with everyone. James would even go as far as to say that you two are friends by now. But he wants so much more. So much more he cant tell you because even if you did know about his feelings, there is nothing either of you could do about it. 

James sighs standing from the sofa, ducking his head when he passes through the doorway to you. You never questions when he just follows you around. The soul bond probably keeping the curiosity at bay if it feels anything like his experience. It feels good for no explicit reason. 

You sort some bowls in your cabinet as he stands behind you, offering to place the ones higher up so you don’t have to struggle too much. “What’s heaven like, James?” You ask innocently through your movements. “Are there pearly gates and fluffy clouds?”

James loves when you say his name. It makes him feel closer to you than ever before. In a way, he equates it with your touch. Just as his saying your name is his way of reaching out to you. 

“More like endless paperwork and celestial coffee breaks.” Coffee breaks. He learned about those a while ago and he loves the concept. “But hey, the views are to die for.” He gets lost in your eyes, remembering how much more distant they felt when he was watching from above and he is thankful to be this close to you now.

You smile smugly, and thats when the heart race sets in again. He’s sure you feel it too. Because your eyes avert and your hand places itself atop your chest. 

You think something is wrong with you, he just knows it. It’s like the time you watched hours on hours of Gray’s Anatomy and then proceeded to research yourself into a frenzy about the sicknesses you might suffer. But James made sure then that there was not even a paper cut compromising you and he will do the same now, too.

He is desperate to tell you what it is you feel, that there is not much you can do and that he feels it ten times worse because he hates to see you suffer. But he needs to be careful about how much he reveals to you. 

“Oh my god, I’m getting paranoid,” you mutter to yourself and James smirks at your small slip up. He has noticed how you try to minimize your references in curses. It’s cute, really, because he knows how much you used to do it. It’s a little bit amusing, the small deviant trait of yours making him feel like he has found something in common with you and he’s almost proud of it.

You collect yourself, quickly, breathing in deeply and then turning around to him. “I have to run some errands today.” 

“Great, where are we going?” James asks with eagerness. Car rides excite him. He has always found them fascinating, but actually being in one is a whole new experience. 

You bite your lip and for once, James does not feel the familiar tingle in his stomach when you do so. There is sadness sitting in your eyes when you answer him. “Actually...” Your tongue darts out to wet your lip just for your teeth to dig into it again and an unfamiliar tightness travels through James’s body. “It is something I need to do by myself today. I hope that is okay.”

The angel nods vigorously, trying to ignore the pang in his chest. “Yes of course. I will leave you to it alone.” He steadies himself on the door frame and then heads to the living room where he grabs a book and settles on your window sill to look occupied. 

“It is nothing personal, James.” Your head dips from the doorway and he looks up. “It's just... it would be weird for you to be there.”

“I understand.” The way he adds your name to his answer makes him sick. But his body is feeling weird, not showing him the familiar signs of jealousy or anger he knows. It feels... warm and uncomfortable. 

“I will be back soon.” Your voice travels through the hallway and your footsteps along with it. James stares at the empty doorway for a while, his eyes shooting down to the book when you suddenly reappear. “Do you want anything from the store?”

“No, thank you.”

“Okay.”

And then the door falls shut. But before James can get consumed by his loneliness, he puts the books down - something about an ice breaker - and heads outside to follow you. 

❁ ❁ ❁

But earth can be a lonely place. At least hell will welcome you with warmth.

❁ ❁ ❁

You didn’t lie. You were at the store. But now that you’re treading on the small path towards the grey cemetery walls, James feels the fear spread through his body like a slow and painful death. 

He’s hiding behind the trees closing around the park, watching you as you halt before a simple headstone. He can feel your mourning deep within his heart, tugging, yanking, pulling on the tiny strings that sting so effectively. His temple leans against the rough bark as his eyes trace your slow movements. You place a small bouquet of flowers on the soil before the engraved letters, resting your forehead on the gold stone. 

He can’t see it completely, but he knows you’re crying. You always do. Everything within him screams to reach out to you, to hold you and sway you until the world feels less taunting, but he knows how difficult it could make things. 

So, instead, he remains hidden, a silent sentinel in the shadows bearing witness to your sorrow from afar. He feels the weight of your tears as if they were his own, each drop a dagger to his soul and a reminder of the distance that separates him from you. 

And yet, even in the midst of your pain, there is a flicker of something else - resilience, determination, a quiet strength that refuses to be extinguished. It’s a testament to your spirit, a beacon of hope in the darkness that threatens to consume you both. 

As you linger before the headstone, lost in your memories and your grief, James feels a surge of admiration swell within him. Despite the pain you carry, you continue to preserve. 

“It’s really a shame you never have the balls to comfort her.” A voice whispers in his ear and James shoots around to be met with a redhead whose eyes stare daringly up at him. “Then again... I guess it would be kind of ironic, don’t you think?” 

“What are you doing here, Wanda?” All angels are made weary of Lucifer’s spawn. They are vicious and manipulating, carrying the pits of hell to places that least expect them and watch it all go up in flames as they stand laughing on the sidelines. 

James knows the demon standing before him. More than once have their paths crossed throughout time, but he is surprised to see her every time anew. He refuses to show any sign of weakness in her presence, knowing that to do so would only invite further manipulation.

Wanda chuckles darkly, her laughter echoing through the trees. “Oh, nothing much,” she muses with a wicked grin, pacing around James to take a closer look at him. “Just though I’d remind you of what you’re missing out on by playing the good little guardian angel. But who knows... maybe one of these days, you’ll finally grow a spine and take what you want.”

James clenches his jaw, struggling to maintain his composure in the face of Wanda’s relentless provocation. He knows better than to let her under his skin, but the demon’s words cut deep, striking at the heart of his insecurities. He feels the surge of frustration rising within him as his fists clench by his sides, the weight of his silver cuffs pressing against his wrists like chains. “I can’t,” he whispers, his voice barely above a whisper. “You know I can’t”

Wanda’s gaze narrows as her arms cross in front of her chest. “Can’t or won’t?” She counters, her voice tingling with an unspoken dare. 

James hesitates, his mind racing with conflicting thoughts and emotions. "I... I don't know," he admits finally. "But it doesn't matter. My duty lies with heaven, with protecting her. I can’t do that when I’m lost in the in-between.”

Wanda's eyes glitter with amusement as she takes a step closer, closing the distance between them with an unnerving grace. "And what if heaven isn't where you belong?" she whispers in a seductive purr as her fingers flick against his cuffs. The sound travels through the trees, making you turn and look around you. "What if your heart longs for something more, something... forbidden?"

A shiver runs down his spine, a sudden realization dawning within James. For so long, he has clung to the safety of his celestial duties, fearing the consequences of straying from the path laid out before him. But now, as he stands face to face with the embodiment of temptation itself again, he can't help but wonder if maybe, just maybe, heaven is not the place where he can truly flourish. 

“I don’t trust you, Wanda.” He admits genuinely, though the possibility of her words holding truth gnaws on his very soul.

“You shouldn’t.” She smirks devilishly, eyes flashing in a short glimmer of red and evil. “There will be consequences to disobeying celestial rules. But you will never find out if a life free of them would be more fulfilling to you if you don’t try.” She winks, setting uncertainty free within him. “Find me when you have made the right choice.”

As he watches Wanda disappear into the shadows, leaving him alone with his thoughts, James knows that he is standing at a crossroads—one that would determine the course of his destiny for eternity. And though the path ahead is uncertain and fraught with peril, he can't help but feel a glimmer of hope stir within him, a whisper of possibility that promises a future filled with love, and happiness, and the chance to finally be as close to you as he has always wished for.

❁ ❁ ❁

The night has broken over your small town by now. James has made it back with a conflicted heart before you came home from your errands. He knows you notice his silence as he normally enjoys to talk a lot to you. But you don’t say anything. 

He is just sitting quietly in the kitchen as he watches you make a cup of tea, wondering what it tastes like right before frowning at how scared he is to try a cup of hot water just because he doesn’t know what it would do to him. 

Wanda’s words come back to the forefront of his mind and the unease she instilled within his heart right alongside it. He has been longing to reach out to you for so long, has wanted to touch and comfort you in so many ways his mind began to spin. Especially after days like this, when you went to visit your brother’s grave. You would be crying yourself to sleep tonight. And you would get up tomorrow, wipe the sorrow from your eyes and continue to live your life as if nothing happened. Because you are strong and resilient. 

And James, even though he is finally present, is not able to offer you the solace you so desperately deserve. 

At least he thought so.

His eyes wander to the silver cuffs around his arms, feeling the weight and letting the subtle clink of them seep into his skull. He has never questioned why or how the rules of heaven applied to him. He never even thought about the consequences of breaking them until he felt the need to protect you. He never really cared until you became the most important thing in his life. 

Now, seeing the pain in your gaze, and feeling the guilt for being here, not soothing you gnaws on him, sending him back to a state in which he would kill to see you smile again. Free of fear and sorrow. 

You bite your lip when you settle on the chair across from his. Your eyes look dull, but James can’t help but think there is a question posed within them. Something desperate and restricted. Oh, how he would love to know what you’re trying to say. He is just too inexperienced with human interaction that he can get a read on everything just yet. 

James feels his heart picking up, knowing it beats in the same rhythm as yours, but he doesn’t dare speak, knowing his voice will betray him. Your tea cup is empty, your eyes tired, and he knows that this evening with you will end within seconds. 

“Good night, James.” You finally say, following the small ritual you have established with him as you wave at him weakly. 

Normally, he says it back. Normally, he guides you to the bedroom and closes your door promising to watch over you in silence. Normally, he doesn’t have a demon’s words ringing in his ears. 

But today, something feels different. As you gather your things and head towards your bedroom, a sudden surge of determination courses through him. He can't bear the thought of being separated from you, even for a moment longer.

With a sense of reckless abandon, and the words of Wanda hanging in his mind James makes a daring decision. Ignoring the warnings echoing in his every being, he reaches out to you, his touch barely grazing your shoulder as you turn to leave.

In that fleeting moment of contact, something shifts. A spark ignites between you, a connection so powerful and undeniable that it defies explanation. Time seems to slow as you both freeze, caught in the throes of a bond that transcends the boundaries of heaven and earth.

For a heartbeat, everything hangs in the balance, the air crackling with electricity. And then ...nothing happens. 

There is no rush of wind and light that makes him disappear, leaving behind only the echo of his presence lingering in the empty space between. There is nothing else welcoming him in wrath or absolute nothingness or whatever is supposed to happen if a celestial ever dared to touch a mortal.

He opens his eyes that he had shut tight without noticing. And you’re still here. In front of him, staring at his hand that is softly wrapped around your wrist. His mind is struggling to make sense of what just happened - or rather what didn’t. It was all a hoax. 

James feels rage bubble within him. And as you stand there, alone in the quiet stillness of the room, touching. He counts yet another reason why heaven was never where he belonged.

A single tear rolls down his cheek when he pulls you into his body and wraps his arm around you tightly. His heart beats violently, pumping the anger of knowing how much time he wasted not being close to you through his body. His wings follow close behind, sealing you into his warmth and creating a space just for you and him. It’s as if you are made for him. Your body tugs perfectly beneath his feathery white wings and he knows he’ll hold you like this for eternity. 

❁ ❁ ❁

He’s touching you. 

James is touching you. No, actually, he’s consuming you with his whole being, pulling you into the best hug you have ever received. His wings wrap around you protectively, engulfing you into his scent entirely. It’s earthy, and clean, and... heavenly. 

You chuckle slightly as your cheek presses to his chest, your head barely reaching his collar bone, but it just makes you feel enclosed by his presence from all around. You heart beats just as rapidly as his and you exhale in content as you realize that you’re not the only one feeling this connection. 

You don’t know what changed. Maybe you are not as good as hiding your sadness as you think you are. Or maybe there is a whole other reason behind this angel guarding you into the most loving hug you have ever experienced. But fact is, you needed it today more than ever. 

And James knew ...because he strangely knows so much about you. He feels familiar without trying and it is a weirdly comforting thing to experience. Especially after all you have been through. 

Hesitantly, and almost sorrowfully, you pull away from his warm chest. His wings loosen around you, his arms leaving just enough space for you to lean back and stare into those azure blue eyes of his. He’s beautiful up close. Long lashes frame his loving stare as his mouth tugs into a smile, taking yours right with it. 

“You touched me.” You say in awe as James’s eyebrows slightly raise. “You thought I didn’t notice, but I did.” 

There is a steak silence as his gaze travels over your face then roams his arms that are still holding you tightly close to him. “Should I not be touching you?” He asks carefully.

You can feel his hands retreating but you pull him right in before they’re gone. “I was just wondering when you would.” You snuggle back into his shirt and his hands cradle your head to him. “Is it embarrassing to say I’ve wanted you to do it for a while now?”

“Not embarrassing at all.” His chest rumbles with a chuckle. “I’ve wanted to do it even before then. I just didn’t know if I could.” The last part is a mere whisper that dissipates in your hair when his mouth presses to it in a feather light brush. 

A rush of warmth floods through you, filling every corner of your being with a sense of belonging you've never known before. Time seems to stand still, the world falling away until there is nothing left but the two of you, entwined in each other's arms.

"You've wanted to touch me?" you murmur, the words slipping out before you can stop them, a confession born of the unspoken longing that has lingered between you for far too long.

James's gaze softens, his fingers trailing gently along the curve of your cheek as he meets your eyes with a look of quiet intensity. "More than you could ever know," he replies. "But I feared the consequences.”

“What consequences?” James shakes his head as his thumb still lingers on your skin. 

“I don’t know.” You reach up to cup his face in your hands, your thumbs brushing against his cheekbones as you search his eyes again. It was stupid of you to assume he didn’t touch you because he didn’t like you. He was probably scared of what would happen if angels ever dared. The look in his deep blues tells you how worried he was. How long he withheld for the sake of dodging the unknown. 

“It’s not bad, is it?” You hand travels across his chest, feeling the muscles tense in its wake. “Touching.” 

James's breath catches in his throat, his heart pounding against his chest as he gazes down at you with a mixture of awe and reverence. And once again, you would love to know what is happening inside his brain. 

With a trembling hand, James cups your face in his palm, his touch gentle yet possessive as he leans in to press his forehead to yours. You cant help but feel that there is something keeping him from you, still. 

“Let me stay with you tonight, my beloved.” His fingers tighten around your face ever so slightly. “Let me hold you and keep you safe.”

“Safe from what?” You ask in a trance as your fingers bury in his hair and you play with the thought of pressing your lips to his. But he has taken so long to hug you. You don’t want him to be overwhelmed. 

“Anything.” He whispers back and closes his eyes. A whole new warmth consumes you when his words seep in, blanketing you in cherish and admiration. If this is what being appreciated feels like, you will fight to keep the feeling forever. 

“Okay.”

❁ ❁ ❁

Oh how much the celestials have lied. Flying is nothing compared to this. 

❁ ❁ ❁

As you bustle about the diner, taking orders and refilling coffee mugs with practiced ease, Peggy sits at her usual spot at the counter, her eyes twinkling with mischief as she watches you work.

"Something on your mind, Peggy?" you ask with a smile, setting down a plate of pancakes in front of a hungry customer.

Peggy leans in closer, her voice low and conspiratorial. "I couldn't help but notice that smile of yours, dear," she says with a knowing wink. "It's positively radiant today. Dare I say, it's almost as if you've got a secret?"

You chuckle, feeling a flush of warmth spread across your cheeks at her observation. “Hmm, I don’t know,” you reply coyly, unable to suppress the grin that tugs at the corners of your lips as you tab your finger against them. “What makes you think I’d share it with you?”

“Well, I am a loyal customer for one...” She pauses as she thinks of another point. “And I am old enough to think the secret dies with me." Peggy presses, her eyes sparkling with curiosity.

“Please, you know the entire town.” You laugh and Peggy waves her hand dismissively, though there is a proud smirk on her red lips. 

Before she can respond, a voice cuts through the air like a knife, sharp and tinged with bitterness. "What's all this about smiles and secrets?”

You turn to see Old Lee leaning against the counter with a grim expression. His worn-down straw hat flops over his eyes, making him look even more grumpy than usual.

"It's nothing, Stan," you reply, trying to defuse the tension with a forced smile. "Just some friendly banter."

Old Lee’s eyes narrow slightly. "Friendly banter, huh? You're squawking like a bunch of chickens in a henhouse."

Peggy rolls her eyes, clearly unimpressed by Stan's attitude. "Oh, hush up, Stan," she scolds, waving a dismissive hand in his direction. "Can't you see we're having a moment here? This is girl talk. Go and drink your tea like the grumpy old man you are.”

Old Lee shakes his head in response but wisely chooses to turn back to his drink. “We all know how the last time she came in here with a smile that big turned out.” Old Lee grumbles searching your eyes once more. “The frogs're telling me we’ll have another rain comin’ soon. You better be careful, sweetheart.”

You share a conspiratorial look with Peggy, either of you not sure wether to believe him or not. Stan is not one for sappy love stories, but he certainly hits the nail on the head with his predictions every time. His bold hint towards the last big death this town suffered glides off his tongue like a Sunday prayer and it ripples down your spine in ice-cold peaks. 

“That is in the past. Right now, I really am hoping we are talking about the charming gentleman I talked to the other week. He certainly is a sight for sore eyes.” Peggy’s eyes sparkle as Old Lee huffs into his cup.

She winks back at you and the smile returns to your lips, along with the giddy feeling you get when James is called into your mind. But before you can respond, the diner door swings open, signaling the arrival of another customer and putting an end to your conversation—for now, at least.

❁ ❁ ❁

A noise calls from the back of your house right before the sun starts its journey in the sky. You don’t wake as James tries to stir carefully with his arms still holding you tightly. He was not sleeping - he doesn’t need sleep, but he still feels groggy from the warm and comforting night being ripped away with the sound. 

It piques another time and now, James is sure, someone is trying to get inside. Within minutes he is out of bed, checking the window and then closing the door to your bedroom on his way to the back. 

He is ready to protect you at all costs, eager to show you how much you mean to him, but when he sees a touch of white beyond the window and hears the familiar rustling of feathers that accompany it, it only takes him a second to realize who has come to intrude your peace. 

Two men - angels - just as tall has James litter the kitchen once he opens the door and pulls them inside with both hands. Samuel, the one standing a little to the side, brushes his clothes off once he comes to a stand again, watching James with amusement and curiosity. “I see you haven’t changed much, James. A simple ‘hello’ would have been just fine.” He crosses his arms before his chest, his wings shaking the dowry rain from their feathers and right onto your kitchen floor. 

“Why are you here?” His eyes search those of Steven - a friend of his but also an angel ranking higher than James ever will.

“You know why we’re here.” He steps closer once he has composed himself again. “You are testing the heavens.” 

James huffs, feeling the anger rise inside him. If anything, heaven was testing him. So he goes on to ignore the blonde angel before him, willing his heart to calm at all the frustration accumulating at once. “Did you know it was a lie?” James starts instead. His voice is strained when he thinks of all the times he refrained from touching you just to keep you safe. “Just a way to keep us from initiating contact?” 

Steven doesn’t say anything and Samuel’s stare meets that of James again. Steven shows little remorse, the pride on display now more than usual. The supposed betrayal James has caused is nothing to the sting boring into his soul by the very man standing in font of him. Steven is cold, distant - when he should be a friend.

“I should have known.” James shakes his head. “Your duties have always placed higher than your friendships.”

“That is because duties are the most valuable virtue God can give.” Steven finally says and his jaw ticks angrily. 

James could never imagine being more loyal to a system placing as many restrains as heaven does. Not when he knows how good the real world can feel. How precious it is to smell flowers and hold the one you love in your arms well into the night. 

“You came here with a mission, James. And since your fall, you have done nothing but frolic throughout this place with your very own human.” Samuel is eerily still behind the broad blonde spitting one accusation after the other. But James decides not to comment on it just yet. 

“It is far more than that,” he rasps feeling the protectiveness flood his body. 

“We know. That is why you are here in the first place.” 

“What am I supposed to do, Steven?” James tries to keep his voice low, but his frustration is too great. Steven should be the one to understand better than anyone else. But he seems to have locked that part of him far away right now. “How can I amend a sin that is irreversible?!”

“Every sin can be amen-“ Steve’s eyebrows raise and Samuel’s eyes flickers from James and focuse behind him. That is when his heart beat picks up again. And as much as he loves you, he wishes with all his being that you are not standing behind him right now.

“Please, no.” He mutters and turns just to have you approach from the hallway with tired eyes. 

“What is happening? Who are you?” Your voice sounds sleepy, a hand rubbing over your face before you find yourself by James’s side.

“Angels.” He bites his lips, contemplating for a moment but deciding that you deserve to hear what is happening in your own home. A home he hopes to be part of forever. Besides, with Steven here, there is no ending this conversation without confusing you more. “They want me to abandon you.” The bitterness is evident in his tone. But he regrets it as soon as he catches the stutter in your heart.

“What?” It’s all you say, but the way you do breaks his collected facade. 

“James-“

“What do I have to loose, Steven?” his arms open wide. "They already cast me out. They took my freedom, they took it all.” His wings barely shake, just emphasizing his statement. 

Steve steps closer, causing you to slightly shove yourself behind James, his arm reaching around you, just not touching yet. ”But there is still a chance to redeem yourself.”

“What if I don’t want it?” James bites back. 

“Don’t act rash, James. Think about this.“

“I have.” Long and hard. Every night he holds you, he has enough time to do so. And he has come to the conclusion that nothing compares to having you this close to him... and only him.

“You know of the punishment placed for sinners who do not attempt to right their wrongs.” Steven is seething beneath the surface, James can tell. But he tries to stay professional. He can try all he wants. James has already made a decision. 

“What is he talking about?” Your voice takes him back to your presence. Your hands sneak around his forearm and hand, to which his body responds like a reflex. His fingers squeeze yours, his body seeks the heat of yours. Samuel looks at the interaction curiously, Steven settles for a disapproving taunt.

“I lose my wings. I lose heaven.” James explains to you, watching as your eyes open wider in shock. 

“What?” There is so much more behind your astound answer. What does this mean for us?

“James is banished from the heavens temporarily already.” Steven’s voice drips with authority, making you stiffen beside him. James hates it. And he doesn’t hate much. 

“Why?” You’re too soft for this, too fragile to take another betrayal so soon. He has just gotten started and he already feels you drifting away. Your eyes are glassy when you turn to Steven. “What could have possibly been so bad that you ended up here?” 

“You didn’t tell her?” Sam breaks his silence. The surprise is written all over his face just to be replaced by confusion when James utters his name in warning. 

“Tell me.” It seems as though his eyes switch between everyone in the room, trying to warn them all of what will happen if they take his opportunity of telling you himself.

“James is not just any angel.”

“Steve, stop it.” 

“He is your guardian angel.”

It all happens too fast. A look to Samuel tells him there is no ending this. Steven won’t stop until he has tried his all to have you turn from James. 

“And he committed the worst sin of them all.” You look shocked and expectant. The grip on James’s hands grows tighter with every syllable leaving Steven’s mouth. And James is silently cursing the angel in front of him “He killed a man... for you.” 

You stumble back and James catches you only to earn a warning glare from Steven and Samuel. 

“Brock,” you whisper and it sounds like the single word has taken the entire air out of your system.

Lighting brightens your house over the stifled morning gleam and thunder sounds dangerously in the distance. You’re flinching, though searching James’s eyes as he steadies you back on your feet. 

“You cant do this forever, James.”

“And what if I try?” He turns fully. “What if I would rather get myself killed than come back to heaven?”

“He wouldn’t” Steve is heaving, but Sam steps forward, Laying a hand on the blonde’s shoulder in an attempt to soothe his rage. “The soul bond affects her just as it does him.”

“What does that mean?” It’s barely a screech when you interrupt them again. Turning to James and tugging at his shirt, you convey the frustration of being kept in the dark through your features. “What does it mean, James?”

He sighs, shaking his head and then closing his eyes - hoping to escape this conversation. But it is happening. “It means, if I die... you will die, too. A soul need replace that of a guardian one.”

At this point, James questions his sanity. How could he have not realized the twisted ways of the celestial realm sooner? In an attempt to soothe both his aching head and your tired soul, he reaches out to pull you into a hug, but your hands swat his arms away.

James recoils as if struck, the sting of rejection shattering his heart into thousands of pieces

“You might think it wise to revisit what we offered you, James.”

The words hang in the air like a dark omen when Steven and Samuel disappear. With a heavy heart, James turns away from you, unable to bear the weight of your disappointment any longer.

As you walk away, James is torn between the desire to comfort you and the fear of causing you further pain. But when he reaches out to touch you, once more, your tears are a silent testament to the rift that now lies between you. 

"I... I'm sorry," he stammers, his voice choked with emotion. It’s a desperate attempt to fix this, even if he does not know how.

“Go, James. Please. I need time to understand all this-”

“I can help you.”

“-alone. I want to be alone.” You swallow hard. “Leave, please.” Your tears finally spill and James despises that he is at fault of them.

“Go.”

Feeling more abandoned than ever, James leaves you to your grief, the weight of his actions weighing heavily on his soul. In that moment, he realizes that the price of his newfound freedom may be greater than he ever imagined, leaving him trapped in a prison of his own making, forever haunted by the memory of the one he could never save.

He knows there are not many ways to fix this. But he is determined to find the one that will.

❁ ❁ ❁

He doesn’t remember earth to be quite this cold. 

Find me when you have made the right choice. The words keep ringing in his head. 

A little warmth would feel nice now.

❁ ❁ ❁

You were angry when you told James to leave. Angry, and hurt, and confused, and shocked, and fucking tired of it all. 

But now that he is gone, an unfamiliar emptiness has taken its place where your tingles used to be. Everything makes so much sense now. The weirdly familiar feeling. The sense of security around him - a total stranger at the time, who obviously possessed more strength than you could ever imagine. The instant pull from his heart to yours. 

The quiet of your house seems to close in on you. The walls feel tighter, the rooms emptier. Every corner holds a memory of James, a reminder of the presence that had once filled your life with warmth and mystery. His laugh echoing in the hallway, his silhouette framed in the morning light through the kitchen window, the way he seemed to know when you needed comfort before you even realized it yourself.

You sit at the table, staring at your untouched cup of coffee, replaying moments in your mind. The time he effortlessly carried your groceries when you insisted you could manage alone. The nights he stayed up with you, talking about everything and nothing, his voice soothing and familiar. The way he looked at you, as if you were the center of his universe.

The days seem endless without him. Simple tasks feel monumental in the absence of his reassuring presence. You find yourself hesitating before making decisions, second-guessing your choices, yearning for the silent support he always provided. The realization hits you: you had built your life around him, around the safety and stability he brought, even without knowing the full truth of who he was.

You cannot deny that a big part of you misses him despite all the lies he told you. Well, not lies entirely. You know he has always been truthful to you ...he just never told the whole truth until he was forced to.

And even though the other two angels who visited made him reveal his secrets to you, you feel like there is so much more to discover still. 

Your hand settles over your heart, trying to pull the constant racing around James back into existence. But it beats in profound silence, acting as though nothing has happened, when - in fact - everything has changed. James came into your life and unapologetically took your heart away. You don’t want it back. You want him back. Heart or not, your souls are connected. And now that he is gone, you know what you have truly been missing all this time. 

With a sigh, you rise form your chair and grab your keys, determined to find a way to help James out of the trouble he has caused because of you. A shiver runs down your spine at the memories of it all. James’s sin had good intentions, you know this much. But two people died at the time of it - though only one deserves your mourning. 

You pull your door closed and make your way to town hall. The entire left wing of the building is dedicated to the library and you are destined to find out more about the man who crashed into your life and took your heart away... and then disappeared. 

The library is quiet, the soft rustling of pages and the occasional whisper the only sounds that break the stillness. You approach the counter, where a librarian is meticulously organizing a stack of book. She looks up as you approach, her kind eyes lighting up with curiosity. 

“Hello, dear,” she says warmly. How can I help you today?”

You hesitate for a moment but then you decide to just start at the beginning. “I’m looking for some texts about angels,” you finally say, your voice barely above a whisper. “More specifically fallen angels... and the consequences of disobeying.”

The librarian raises an eyebrow and a look close to amusement and happiness reaches over her face. “That’s a rather specific topic,” she muses and your brow begins to sweat. Maybe this was a stupid idea. The woman is still eyeing you with a smolder, but then, as if you pushed a button, she shrugges and begins to type away on her computer. “Good thing it’s my job to get you exactly what you need.”

She nods slowly after a little while. “We do have some old texts and legends about angels. Let me show you.” With that, she lifts her body out of the office chair behind the desk and leads you to the far end of the library. It’s a quiet corner where the oldest books are kept. She pulls an ancient-looking leather-bound volume from a high shelf. For the place it has been kept, it is surprisingly dust-free. 

With a smile, she hands it to you and then wishes you ‘happy hunting’.

The book is heavy in your hands. The front is embossed in golden letters. Your fingers trace over it, feeling every ridge and dip. ‘Legends of the Divine and Fallen’, the title reads. 

When you flip through the pages, the book’s well-worn smell engulfs you and something inside you shifts. You brother loved old books. The one in your hand brings you right back to when you were kids. Pietro had a whole wall of shelves filled with his favorite stories. And more so than often, you snuck inside when he was out with his friends, grabbing one whose cover intrigued you the most and then getting lost in the pages until he came back and read it to you. 

He sparked your interest in reading - made you the bookworm you are today. And finally, probably caused you to jump into this adventure with James in hopes of finally living inside on of your fantasy worlds. 

You eyes get caught by a story in the book, your thumbs halting and fully opening the page as intrigue tingles in your entire body with every word you read. 

The Tale of Buchariel: The Curious Angel

In the celestial realms, where light and harmony prevail, there existed an angel named Buchariel. Renowned for his loyalty and dedication, Buchariel was also marked by an insatiable curiosity. His yearning to understand the world beyond the heavenly gates set him apart from his brethren, who were content to serve without question.

One fateful day, driven by an unquenchable thirst for knowledge, Buchariel descended to the mortal realm without divine permission. His eyes beheld the beauty and chaos of humanity, the joys and sorrows that defined their existence. It was in this realm, teeming with life and temptation, that Buchariel's fate took a dark turn.

As Buchariel wandered the earth, a demon of cunning and allure took notice of the angel's presence. This demon, skilled in the art of seduction, approached Buchariel with promises of forbidden knowledge and experiences that no celestial being had ever known. Blinded by his curiosity, Buchariel succumbed to the demon's temptations, engaging in acts that defied the sacred laws of the heavens.

Word of Buchariel's fall reached the celestial realm, and the angels were dispatched to retrieve their wayward brother. They arrived in time to save Buchariel from complete corruption, pulling him from the demon's grasp and returning him to the realm of light. However, the consequences of his actions could not be undone.

The celestial court declared Buchariel's punishment. He was stripped of his rank and given an ultimatum: he could return to heaven only if he vowed never to betray the divine will again. God, in His infinite mercy, offered Buchariel a chance at redemption. He was to serve as a guardian angel, watching over humanity and guiding them towards righteousness. In this duty, he could be close to the world, yet stay obedient to heaven. 

Buchariel accepted his fate, grateful for the opportunity to make amends. Yet, the legend speaks of the angel's perpetual struggle. Constantly exposed to the allure of the mortal world, Buchariel walked a fine line between duty and desire. His heart, once pure and untainted, now carried the scars of his past transgressions.

Eons passed, and Buchariel's vigilance never wavered, but neither did the temptations. His soul remained in perpetual conflict, torn between his heavenly duty and the memories of earthly sensations. The legend warns that Buchariel's fall could occur once more, for the battle within him is eternal. He is an angel forever on the edge of sin, a guardian who knows the weight of temptation, and a being who understands the cost of free will.

Thus, the tale of Buchariel serves as both a caution and a beacon. It reminds all who hear it of the delicate balance between obedience and desire, and the endless journey towards redemption that even the most divine must undertake.

A chill runs down your spine as you realize the parallels between the legend and James. The delicate balance between obedience and desire - serving and sinning. James did sin again. When he killed the man who ended your brother’s life. 

You sit in silence, the weight of your realization settling over you like a shroud. It’s clear that Jame’s story resembles that of Buchariel in too many ways to be a coincidence. He was weirdly comfortable on earth, now that you think about it. For Christ's sake he even told you he had met God ‘under rather unfortunate circumstances’. If what the legend says is true, unfortunate is the understatement of the century. Now you cant help but wonder what price he might pay for his defiance.

❁ ❁ ❁

The diner hums with its usual activity, the clatter of dishes and the murmur of conversations fill the air. You move mechanically from table to table, refilling coffee cups and taking orders, but your mind is elsewhere, clouded with thoughts of James and the emptiness his absence has left behind.

Peggy, sitting at her usual spot at the counter, watches you with concern etched on her face. She waits until you pass by her with the coffee pot before speaking up.

"What's happened to that smile of yours, dear?" Peggy asks, her voice soft and maternal. "You used to light up this place."

You force a smile, but it doesn't reach your eyes. "Just tired, Peggy. You know how it is."

Peggy's eyes narrow, not buying your excuse for a second. "Tired, my foot. Something's bothering you. You can talk to me, you know."

Before you can respond, Scott chimes in with a smirk. "At least now I know you’re back to normal," he says, his tone dripping with sarcasm. "Thought you were gonna float away with all that grinning you were doing."

You shoot Scott a glare, feeling a mix of irritation and sadness. "Thanks, Scott. Really helpful."

“Always at your service” He tips his nonexistent hat, almost bringing a chuckle up within you. In his own way, he never faisl to cheer you up a little.

Peggy waves a dismissive hand at Scott and turns her full attention back to you. "Don't mind him, honey.” She leans in closer, her expression softening. "But seriously, what's going on? I haven't seen you this down in a while."

You sigh, the weight of your emotions pressing down on you. "It's complicated, Peggy. Someone important to me... well, they're not around anymore. And it's just... hard."

Peggy reaches out and pats your hand gently. “We all miss Pietro, dear. Losing someone is never easy... especially after all you’ve been through.”

You nod, grateful for her kindness, but the ache in your chest remains. You can't bring yourself to tell her it’s not your brother you are mourning at this time. "I appreciate that."

The hustle and bustle of the diner continues around you, but for a brief moment, you feel a small measure of comfort in Peggy's concern.

As you turn to refill another customer's coffee, Peggy's words linger in your mind. Maybe opening up a bit more wouldn't be such a bad idea. Maybe, just maybe, sharing the burden could help ease the pain of James's absence, even if only a little. But who should you talk to? The only person you were every really close with is gone...

❁ ❁ ❁

Yet another day passes in which you worry yourself tired. The house feels emptier than ever, the silence pressing in on you as you move through the rooms like a ghost. You try to distract yourself with chores and routines, but your thoughts always circle back to James. Wondering if he’s safe or thinking about you.

You sink into the worn armchair by the window, your favorite spot to watch the world outside. But tonight, the familiar view brings no comfort. The sky is a dark canvas, the stars hidden behind thick clouds. You hug your knees to your chest, feeling the loneliness wrap around you like a suffocating blanket as Old Lee’s words echo in your mind once again. 

A quiet sob calls into the empty room - barely audible. And then the tears start falling down your face in constant streams. The memory of his touch, his warmth, his presence, feels like a distant dream. You close your eyes, trying to recall the feeling of James's arms around you, the sound of his heartbeat against yours. It's a comfort and a torment all at once.

You haven’t cried like this since Pietro died... No, actually, you did when the message of Brock’s death reached you. But those were tears of relief rather than pain. 

A sudden chill sweeps through the room, at the memory of the man who tormented your life in more ways than one. You open your eyes, frowning as you notice that it’s not only the thought of Brock making you feel this way. The air seems to crackle with an otherworldly energy. The hairs on the back of your neck stand on end, and you feel a strange pull, a familiar yet eerie sensation that makes your heart race.

You stand up slowly, your breath hitching in your throat. The room feels alive with a palpable tension, as if the very fabric of reality is shifting. You turn around, your eyes scanning the dimly lit space.

And then you see him.

❁ ❁ ❁

James stands before you, his presence both startling and comforting, he notes as your herts sync again. His eyes meet yours, filled with a mix of relief and sorrow. You look as if you've been through a storm, yet there is a resolute strength in your gaze that anchors him. He probably doesn’t look much better, considering he in fact has been in said storm. But he’d do anything to come back to you. 

"James," you breathe, your voice trembling with emotion. "You're here.”

He steps forward, closing the distance between you. "I’m here," he says softly, his voice carrying the weight of all the unspoken words and unshared moments.

You reach out, your hand trembling as it touches his cheek, as if verifying that he is real and not another figment of your imagination. Your skin is cold and the sensation sends a flood of emotions through him.

"Where have you been?" you ask, your voice cracking with the weight of your worry.

“It is a long story," he replies, his hand covering yours. "But right now, all that matters is that I'm here. With you.”

In that moment, the world outside fades away, and all that exists is the space between you and James. The silence is filled with unspoken promises and the electric charge of a reunion long overdue. 

When you fall into his arms crying, his knees feel like giving out. He has had a long journey behind him, but he would die before showing you weakness when you need him the most. “I thought I would never see you again!” You cry even harder and James wraps his arms around you with loving pressure.

“I’m here,” he tries to soothe you. His wings come around you once again in search for the calmness that washes over him when he realizes you feel safe. 

“I don’t think I can do without you anymore.” Your voice is muffled against his chest but his heart leaps at your confession. Warmth spreads throughout his body as the realization hits that you finally feel close to the emotions he has harbored for you for so long. 

James wants to promise you that he’ll never leave again. He wants to tell you that there is nothing worth losing you. Not the most tempting offer to ever exist. He wants to hold you forever, in fact, do more than just hold you and give into the feeling he has only ever heard about from demons and sinners. 

But he can’t. Because he knows it would not be true. 

His feud with heaven is far from over. And the journey he plans to venture holds great unknown. So, he settles for the one thing he can tell you with certainty. 

“I cannot be without you, either, my beloved. There is so much I want to experience with you but the most important of them all is love. I love you, with my entire soul and heart. I cannot deny you this truth any longer. I have done the unspeakable because of it and you deserve to know.”

You eyes look up at him widely, a question in them that has waited long enough to be asked. “Brock’s death wasn’t an accident,” you whisper, but your posture remains steady. There is no pain or sorrow in your face. Just pure, plain curiosity.

“They told me he was mugged and thrown in the river. But it never made sense to me.” You pull a little out of his touch and James lets you even though his entire body screams to keep you close. “This town is too small to be mugged in. He was killed with a single stab to his heart. A mugger would never be so efficient.”

You gleam at him, seemingly waiting for him to confirm. But James stands in your presence with a sense of pride. He does not regret is transgression, not when it meant keeping you safe - which was and still is his greatest aim. 

“The way he was found was too peaceful to be from a robbery, either.” You tell him shaking your head. “How can you make a murder look so respectful and honest?” 

“I am sorry if I have upset you, dearest-“

“You haven’t. Brock Rumlow was a bad man. It took me a long time to notice, but he was abusing and ill-driven. If anything, I am upset I couldn’t thank you sooner that he is gone.”

“I had played with the though of removing him from the face of the earth for quite some time,” James confesses, feeling all the secret’s weight rolling off him like avalanches. “From the moment he first screamed at you... to the time he laid his hands on you. But I knew you were strong. I was so proud of you for getting up each day and moving on. I would have never acted had he not hurt you in a way even i could feel throught the very bond that ties our souls together. I knew you could handle the hurtful words, even the hurtful touches - that no-one, and especially not you, deserves. Your brother is of similar cunning as myself. But he was brave enough to act while I was fearing the consequences of testing celestial rule once more.” 

James catches the new tears rushing down your cheeks. But he wont stop telling you. He knows you need to hear it. It hurts him to revisit the memory of watching Pietro die in his quest to secure your freedom. “I was trying to honor you brother as much as ensure your safety when I... killed Brock.” He clears his throat and takes your hands in his. “He would have continued to hurt every person he encountered. I do not regret what I did.”

“Oh, James.” Your hands reach up to his face. James bows down to follow the tug you apply to his jaw. “Thank you for telling me. I am not angry. And despite what the other angels said, I know you are a good person. I love you, too.” 

You smile as James’s hands cover yours on his face. Your foreheads are touching and the room around you fades into nothingness. In this moment in time, there are just you and him, and all the new feeling bubbling inside him that he his eager to explore. 

He’s known it for long, but now he is certain than going back to heaven was never an option. Not when you are still here. 

“I would love to kiss you right now,” you whisper in the space between you, igniting a heat within James he has never felt before.

“I would like that very much,” he confesses and as soon as the words leave his lips, yours are firmly pressed against his. 

The sensation is overwhelming. Your lips are soft and warm, moving against his in a way that sends shivers down his spine. His hands still press yours to his skin, unsure what to do and overwhelmed with the experience opened to him. You gently take them and move then to your waist, then a little lower, making him trace the curve of your body as your tongue slowly slips between his lips. The contact sends a surge of electricity through him, making his heart race.

The kiss is tentative at first, each of you exploring this new and wondrous connection. Your fingers weave into his hair, anchoring yourself to him as if afraid he might vanish with this daring protest against heaven. He can feel the gentle tremor in your touch, the same mixture of awe and desire that he feels within himself.

You pull back slightly, just enough to look into his eyes. Your breath mingles with his, cheeks heated and lips swollen. “Move your hands, James,” you whisper, guiding his hands to slide even lower on your body, teaching him how to hold you close, even though he thought he has always done so right. This is different. This is more.

He follows your lead, fingers trembling with the intensity of the moment as they squeeze flesh, eliciting a soft whimper from you that makes James’s insides stir. Or maybe it is not his insides after all, he notices when his pants feel tighter all of a sudden. 

Each brush of your lips against his, each caress, speaks of the longing and love that has been building between you for so long. James deepens the kiss, more confident now, feeling the warmth of your body against his, and it’s as if the world outside has ceased to exist.

Your thumb brushes over his cheek, and you smile, voice breathless. “You’re doing great.”

The kiss becomes more fervent, your guidance helping James navigate this new territory. He feels like he’s pouring all his love and devotion into this one act, wanting to convey everything he’s never been able to say. His wings reach round you tentatively, leaving enough air for you to breathe. He want’s to be wrapped up in you more - he cannot explain it.

James pulls back slightly, his breath coming in shallow gasps. “This... this is incredible,” he murmurs in a voice husky with wonder. “I’ve never felt anything like this before.”

You smile, eyes sparkling. “Neither have I.”

Your lips find each other again, more urgent this time, as if you’re making up for lost time - at least James is. The demon who lured him down the first time failed to mention this part of humanity to him.

“I want to show you more,” you finally whisper against his skin and at this point, James is willing to walk the sun if you asked him to. 

“Everything,” he rasps, his lips touching you with every syllable. He cannot get enough of your taste. “Show it all to me, my love.”

“I want to start with taking off our clothes.” You kiss him again, making Jame’s pants feel even tighter. He knows about sex and he knows it is what you are hinting at. But he has never experienced it. It is no use to angels, since they cannot impregnate another. In heaven, it is rarely talked about - and if it is, one is warned about it. 

Right now, James does not care why. He is eager to experience as much as there is on earth with you and then some. So, he lets you guide his hands over your shoulders, shrugging your cardigan off your body and letting his fingers glide beneath the thin straps adorning your shoulders now. 

His hands are so big compared to yours. He marvels in the fact of how much stronger he is, making him able to protect you that much better. 

James has no difficulty guiding the clothes from your body. Nakedness is something barely acknowledged where he comes from. But today... something about it feels different. This situation feels so much more intimate than it usually does. And he notices, when you kneel down to pull his pants down, his cock stands proud from his body, bigger than usual, and hard and- “Oh!” sensitive, he notes when your lips kiss his hip, your face slightly grazing his member in the action. 

With your head next to it, it looks disproportionately huge, but you don’t seem to mind. 

“This... I have never done this before.” James’s hands guide you back up to him. He is certain his cheeks are glowing red by now. He feels hot and bothered, yet so yearning for more of the teasing your face provided for mere seconds before. 

“Are you okay with continuing?” Your eyes find his again. 

“Yes.”

“Okay, good.” And when he nods, you take his hand and lead him down the hall to your bedroom. 

He has missed this place, missed holding you for the time he went away, but he can't tell you where he has been just yet. Not now, anyway. Right now, he wants to experience whatever you are willing to show him. 

You walk around him, touching him all over, watching him react and making him lean down only to pull back before his lips can get a taste of yours again. It’s beautiful agony and James is torn between pulling you into his strong grip and letting you wind him up until his balls feel like they are the ones squeezed tightly. They already are...

Eventually, you come to a stop behind him. He jolts when you fingers drive over the top of his wings, only for you to mumble a quick ‘sorry’ and coming back around in front of him. 

“Don’t be sorry. I was just not expecting it.”

You stare past him and at the white feathers protruding from his back. “They are so soft... and pretty.” You find his eyes. “All of you is pretty.”

He reaches for your face, finding pride in the way you nestle into his palm with a smile. “And dear, you are the most beautiful being the world has ever seen.”

“Can I touch them again?” You whisper only for James to now stare in awe. 

He watches as your hands pass his body in slow-motion. They travel past his ribs and reach carefully towards his wings again. This time, he is prepared, though his stomach feels tight with something opposite of worry. More of a physical feeling he can't begin to explain. He closes his eyes and lets your touch travel over them like a prayer. Your path leaves shivers in its wake and James lets his head hang, reveling in the feeling. He opens his eyes and watches his cock twitch whenever the tingles get too much. 

He gasps breathlessly when you graze the underside of his wings, making his whole body jump slightly. 

“Oh, are those sensitive?” You smile in awe, though your expression turns to excitement when he wheezes out his answer. 

“Very.”

“Do you like it?” 

Your fingers glide over the same spot again, making his cock leak, feeling like he’s about to explode. “Yes!” He grabs the sideboard next to him.

“I want to make you feel good, James” your voice is damp agains this ear and he bites his tongue before bursting. 

“You already do.” 

“I want to make it even better.”

James is not sure he can handle better. He’s already floating miles above the ground when you touch him in the ways you do. Maybe he has to distract himself to enjoy this some more. 

He could think about why heaven would withhold education of how amazing sex can be. That will make him calm a little, posting yet another reason why it was never the place to be for him. 

Your hands wrap around his silver wrists as you guide him to the bed, pushing down on his shoulders until he is sat on the mattress, looking up at you with intrigue and awe. 

“What are you doing?”

“I’m going to ride you, James.” You straddle his lap and his arms immediately reach around you. 

“Ride ...me? I’m not a horse.” He states and watches as your smile lights up. But it settles a weary feeling in his stomach. There is a hint of mischief in your glint, and James is not sure he can handle it right now. 

“Do you trust me?”

“With my entire soul.”

You kiss him and push at his chest. “The lie back for me.”

And so he does, realizing - once again - that anything heaven could offer him pales in comparison to the love he feels for you, a love that knows no bounds or logic and that is reciprocated in your every touch. 

James watches as you scoot up his body until you are sat right behind his cock, which has not ceased to soften one bit since you kissed. It reaches all the way to your navel. But before he can take in the sight and calculate the size difference between you, you press him against your stomach, pulling another moan from his lunges. 

His tip is leaking more and more with every touch you gift him and James starts to worry his body will give out before he can make you feel good. 

“You’re so big, so pretty.” You stroke him from base to top, letting your thumb press into the underside of his cock and send shiver after shiver through James’s body. “I need you inside me.”

“I need that to.” His voice is strangled when you lift up and grind his tip through your wet folds, moaning with the friction he can only assume is the same for you as it is for him. 

In a swift motion, the head of his cock sinks inside you, breaching tight muscle and making him feel dizzy with the new sensation. Your head falls back with a loud breath that makes his abs tighten. This whole time, he feels as though a gust of wind could make him unravel, but something inside him tells James he should hold out - or at least try to. 

The raspy sounds escaping his throat cant seem to stop when you slowly work yourself all the way down his shaft. And the high-pitched scream you set free when his tip reaches another barrier within you makes him twitch and leak even more. 

“Are you alright?” He asks through sweaty brows. 

“I’m amazing.” You smile and lift yourself up only to sink back down into his lap. Your movements become steady, and when he finally gets over the way your mouth hangs slack, the rhythm you set builds even more pressure inside him. 

The room is filled with messy sounds of skin and sweat and moans and heavy breaths. You sink down on him again and again until James feels like he is on fire. But you don’t relent. Your pace never falters when you fall back and your hands grip his thighs, digging into his muscles until his toes curl. 

It’s too much at once and not enough at the same time. James feels as though there is a cliff he could fall over every second now, but he’s too scared to loose the sensations he is experiencing right now to let his body do so. 

“Touch me,” you suddenly say, taking his hands which have fisted inside your duvet until now and placing them on the soft flesh of your breasts. Only now, your nipples are hardened when you guide his fingers over them. “Like this.” You’re somehow fare gone and right there with him. But he does as he his told again, flicking his thumb over the pebbled flesh until your moans grow higher and higher. “Ah, Yes!”

It’s doing something to him, he his twitching every time your pussy squeezes him in tandem with his thumb on your nipples. His body is moving without the permission of his mind when he suddenly thrusts up. And then again. And again. Until you are mewling and crying on top of him, your fingernails digging into his legs painfully hard. 

James immediately drops his hands only to watch you stare at him with wide eyes. 

“What’s the matter. Why did you stop?”

He bites his lips in shame when he realizes he misses your constant movement on his cock. “Am I hurting you?”

You eyes possibly widen further. Leaning forward and capturing his cheeks with both lips and hands, you shake your head after you pull away. “No! No, its a good thing, love. You feel so good. You...” Your expression changes to a rather shy one. “You’re just very big. You should be proud.”

Something inside James clicks as you confess with another kiss to his lips. A smirk spreads beneath them when he curiously thrusts up inside you and experiences your hot breath gains his face. 

In a second, his hands grab onto your hips, his body turns and flips the pair of you until your back hits the mattress as gently as he can offer in his compromised position. 

A last look of reassurance when your eyes lock with his set off the urges he has suppressed so far. His hips snap forward over and over again, your pussy tightening more around him with every push. Your hands are fist into the covers, head thrown back and mouth open. There is no more sound coming from you at this point. And James understands why. He is as overwhelmed with the feeling as you look. When you grow even tighter, gripping this cock until he cannot move anymore, white pleasure as hot as hellfire rushes through his body, kissing his nerves from head to toe. He feels his balls empty as he paints your inside with his spent, only being able to lazily rut into you after a minute to seize every last drop of pleasure this moment has to offer. 

Then he falls forward as if a higher force has taken all the strength from his body, though careful not to hurt you when his weight settles on top of you. 

“What-“ he needs to catch his breath first. “What was that?”

“That,” you open your eyes, chest having with every deep breath, “was an orgasm.” Your hands brush through his hair and James finds himself purring at the touch. “And it was the best one I’ve ever had.” 

You kiss him and chuckle when he looks at you questioningly. “I guess you could say it was outer-worldly... or even heavenly.” 

James rolls his eyes but can’t stop the laugh from slipping his lunges. He pulls back and watches as his softened cock leaves your pussy, only to be followed by your mixed arousal dripping out of you. 

Trance-like, his hand moves to collect the fluid and begins to smear it over your petals, up into the soft tuft above it. He knows angels cannot impregnate other beings, but he is fascinated by the scene in front of him. It’s like a little testimony when he marks you all around the best place he has ever experienced, wordlessly rubbing and enjoying the whimpering sounds you make when he flicks over a particular spot. 

“Is this sensitive?” He teases with a smirk only to be met with a playful smack on his arm. 

“Very.” you say. “But I am entirely satisfied as of right now.”

James sighs and falls into the sheets beside you. “Me too.” He nuzzles into your neck and pulls you closer to his body. He does not care that you are sticky with sweat or that neither of you are cleaned up. He just needs to hold you now that reality has taken its place back around him again. 

“So, you have been watching over me for - what? All my life?”

James hides the chuckle bubbling up his throat at your sudden question. He still has his eyes closed, taking in the feeling of your nails lightly scratching up and down his forearms. It makes him tingly. 

“All your life, yes.”

“And have you ever meddled with other things that were supposed to happen to me?”

“Do you remember the year in which you kept finding pineapples in arbitrary places?”

It’s silent for a moment, but your movements don’t falter. “I always thought that was a weird coincidence.”

James smiles into the crook of your neck. “Consider it my way of adding a little excitement to your life. And maybe a small attempt to make you notice me.”

You push yourself up slightly and rest on your elbows as you look at James. “I like you like this.” You smile.

“Like what?” He’s smiling as well.”

“Less angel, more...” Your hand comes up to gesture at nothing in particular. “...deviant.”

The smile on James’s face turns into a proud grin before he leans up to kiss you tenderly, savoring the moment and pushing away the thought that has been gnawing on him ever since he came back. 

He holds you until you fall asleep, purposefully missing the opportunity to tell you what he has gotten himself into while he was away.

❁ ❁ ❁

James stands in the garden, the sky overcast and heavy with the promise of rain. He’s out here to retrieve a bouquet of your favorite flowers, smiling like a fool because he finally has what he always wished for. All his mishaps and seem worth it when he holds you in his arms at night. 

The flowers are vibrant and alive, and he bends to pick them with a sense of purpose, each blossom a token of his affection. Even as the first raindrops start to fall, his joy is undiminished. The rain doesn’t bother him; it’s a minor inconvenience compared to the happiness he’s found with you. 

As he moves through the garden, he thinks of the moments you’ve shared���the way your eyes light up when you see him, the warmth of your touch, the sound of your laughter, the way you writhe beneath him in she sheets. For the first time in his existence, he feels complete. 

James clutches the bouquet and heads back toward the house, eager to see the surprise on your face when he presents you with the flowers.

But before he can pass the threshold, an eery feeling spreads though is soul, a shadow falls over him but vanishes just as soon. He scans the yard, his sight nestling through the trees at the very edge of it and then suddenly halting when he sees Wanda leaning against one at the very far corner of your property. Her presence is like a dark cloud on the horizon, a stark contrast to the bright joy he feels. Her red eyes glint with a knowing look, and her lips curl into a smirk that sends a chill down his spine.

“Are you not coming inside, James? The weather will only get worse.” You shout through the house only to appear behind him to inspect what is keeping him outside. 

But James’s stare is fixated on the demon in your yard, his protective instincts setting in immediately, scanning his surroundings while keeping a close eye on Wanda. 

“What is going on?” You ask and reach your arms around him from the side. He can sense you’re eyeing him but he knows you see what he is seeing when your entire body grows rigid beside him. 

“Who is that?” you whisper into James’s shoulder as you step even closer to him, your voice barely audible over the increasing patter of rain. He squeezes you a little tighter, trying to shield you from the inevitable storm brewing. A quick look at your state tells him he should have send you inside. But It is too late for that now. 

When his head turns back into the direction of the demon, it is no longer in its prior place. Instead, Wanda has moved across the garden with impeccable speed, looking up at the pair of you a few feet alway from the step leading to your porch. 

“You promised me time to explore the likes of this life.” His voice is low and intimidating, though he knows its futile in the face of a demon. They are scared of very little. 

“And explored you have,” her red hair falls over her shoulder when her head ticks to the side. “Tell me, Bucharius, is it worth the cost?”

The demon knows of the leverage it has on him. James was sure he would follow through with his request from the start. But he forgot, or maybe just hoped, the devil’s spawn would gift him more time until he had to go and seal the contract. 

“You know it is,” he pushes though clenched teeth, hating how your fingers clamp around his arm already. 

“Actually, I don’t. But I would be an idiot to refuse an offer such as yours.” Wanda clasps her long fingers together and grins with evil. “Oh, I will have so much fun with your soul once the time comes.”

The angel closes his eyes tightly, hating the way the demon pressures him to leave so soon. But it is for the greater good, for him at least. He need’s to be selfish for once - to be able to spend a lifetime providing whatever you desire. 

“Just give me a moment, Wanda,” James says, his voice steady despite the chaos inside his head. He knows his flicker of happiness is about to be shattered, but he wants to hold onto it for just a little longer.

“What is happening? What does she want?” There are tears brimming in your eyes and James decides he has seen them far too many times to be a good guardian to you. It just secures his decision to do what Wanda came to collect him for. 

James presses his lips to the crown of your head before gently tilting it upward with his fingers. His gaze is steady, exuding a confidence while you desperately cling to him in your confusion.

“I’m not sure I can handle all this newfound angelic drama,” you mutter with unease, and James kisses you—short and sweet, a fleeting moment of peace.

Then he whispers against your lips, “Please, you handle drama like a queen. Remember that time you dealt with Valentina from accounting?” His attempt at humor brings a small smile to your face, and he momentarily loses himself in the warmth and security it provides.

But the feeling doesn’t last long.

“James has made a deal with the devil,” Wanda grins, her red eyes flashing with malevolent glee.

Her words send shivers over your body, James feels the ripples pass beneath his fingertips. You pull away from your guardian angel, whose troubles have now escalated to an unthinkable level. 

“What does she mean, James?”

❁ ❁ ❁

James’s silence is deafening. You pray, you beg, for this to be a terrible joke, but deep down, you know it’s not.

“James.” Your words are strained, desperate for answers, desperate for reassurance. “What is she talking about?”

“It is true,” James finally admits, his eyes free of sorrow but filled with determination. “I have made a deal with Lucifer. My wings for a mortal life. My soul when it leaves my deceased body after spending a lifetime with you.”

“What?” The word is a whisper, your mind struggling to process the gravity of his confession. Because your cheeks feel salty and stained before you realize what James has just told you. “Why are you doing this?” you ask through your tears.

“Because I’d give up heaven if it meant being with you.” James’s eyes burn into yours, the rain dripping off his wet face deceivingly. His voice is steady, unwavering. “I’d go to hell a thousand times over until my soul burns to ashes if it meant I get to hold you one more time. You’re everything to me. Everything.”

Another wave of shivers slip over your skin with the way he presses the last word. His eyes are fiery, almost desperate. He is trying to make you understand how much better this decision is, but you fail to see how it can. “You can’t do this. You are destined for more. There are many more to come after me that need protecting and watching over.”

“And there have been plenty before you, yet none of them have or will ever compare, my love.” He touches your cheek, but you push his hand away. Your heart is already aching when you watch his face fall at the gesture. But you are not made for these types of dilemmas. You are human for fuck’s sake. “I would spend eternity regretting not experiencing life with you. I am tired of watching; I am over feeling the distance between us. Going back to heaven means finding you someone else to love. And I cannot do that. It would destroy me, burn me alive, rip my heart out of my chest.”

“James, think about this.” Now the first angry tear slips from his face and mixes with he rain which has grown heavier. Dark clouds cast over the scene, matching the mood perfectly. Dreary and sad - how poetic. 

“I have. For far too long. I will never feel truly fulfilled until I can be what you need me to be: a real, tangible person that grows old with you.”

You shake your head, your hair sticking to your skin. “You have to believe me when I tell you that I exist only for you. My life was dull before you entered it, and it will feel like a black hole when you leave. There is nothing—nothing—I wouldn’t do to be with you.”

Never before have words felt more genuine than this. James is hunched forward, his eyes pleading at you from above. A sneaky hand has captured yours and presses it to his chest, where his heart is beating vigorously against your skin. 

Resignation laces your voice when you finally answer him. “So you’re just going to leave now? For how long? What if he tricked you?”

You don’t know  much about all the rules but one thing is for sure, the devil likes to play and deceive. Just the thought of James walking into a trap makes your stomach churn. 

“Then it was worth it.” There is something akin to content and fulfillment in Jame’s stare when his hand squeezes yours and his heartbeat slows. Though your’s seems to do the opposite. 

“No.” You say breathlessly. 

“I’m sorry," he answers, and wraps your fingers around the bouquet in his hands.

“James.”

“I love you.”

“James.”

The rain intensifies, pounding the earth as if mirroring the turmoil in your heart. James turns and lets Wanda put him in chains, leading him away. You fall to your knees, crying, the three words you have yet to say hanging on your lips for nobody to hear. He’s gone. He’s gone without the knowledge of ever seeing you again.

❁ ❁ ❁

And just like that it ends like it began: in tragedy… and rain.

❁ ❁ ❁

Maybe you are just not cut out for happiness, you think as you wipe down the counter with a frown. The sun is shining today, almost mocking your bad mood with every chirping of birds outside. Earlier today, you were so angry about the reflection blinding you inside that you shut the blinds completely. 

James has been gone for a week now and you already feel like breaking down over what you’ve lost whenever something is mentioned that reminds you of him. 

A few days ago, after a really rough night, you swore you’d never let anyone this close to you. It’s the perfect start for you villain origin story, really. Losing your brother to an abusive ex. Losing said abusive ex thanks to a protective angel. Then falling in love with the angel only for him to go to hell for loving you back. 

You heart cannot take another hit. It’s constantly breaking as you think about the torture and pain James is probably suffering in the pits of hell. There is just no more room for another person, another worry, or anything else, really. 

You will just die an old and groggy lady, likely still cleaning this very counter until you cant anymore. The whole town is going to know you as the weird woman with seventy two cats.

You shake at the thought of it, disposing of your towel and grabbings some plates from the counter to clean up some more.

“New customer is yours, freaking weirdo has been standing outside the window and looking inside like some kind of stalker,” Scott mumbles as he paces by you with his head buried in his phone screen. 

You just sigh and throw a used napkin into the trash before loading the dirty plates onto a kitchen tray. 

“I’d like a sandwich, please.” A voice sounds from behind you and your entire body goes rigid.

It can’t be. It cant. For days you have been wishing for James to come back, now you are finally becoming crazy. 

But your heart picks up its familiar sprint and your entire body tingles with hope. Still, you don’t dare to turn around. 

“Are you not going to look at me, dearest?”

Your hands tremble as you grip the edge of the counter. What if it’s real? What if it’s not? The uncertainty gnaws at you, each second stretching into an eternity. You’ve dreamed of this moment, but dreams are fickle things, easily shattered by the harsh light of reality.

“James...” The name slips out in a whisper, a plea, a hope. Tears sting your eyes, and you squeeze them shut, bracing yourself for the worst.

You take a deep breath and finally turn around. Truly, there he stands in front of you, with a bright and gleaming grin on his lips. There is one thing you notice immediately: the silver cuffs on his arms are gone. And he looks oddly free without them.

Almost trance-like, you round the counter, your had reaches out to him, touching his jaw, gliding down the length of his neck until your fingertips disappear into the soft curls in the back of it. 

“Is it really you?” You whisper in awe as you start to drown in the familiar blue of his eyes. And when James covers your hand with his, squeezing his reassuring sequence to your bones, you know. It’s real. 

“In the ...flesh.” he frowns but then smiles widely. 

“What happened when you were gone?” Your curiosity gets the better of you, but James just shakes his head and then turns his face to kiss the inside of your wrist. 

“Not here, love. Take me home... if you’ll have me. Take me back. I promise no more secrets from now on.”

You just nod vigorously, finally pulling James into your embrace. The worry raging inside you fades into insignificance, eclipsed by the certainty that in this moment, you’ve regained something intently more powerful - a bond that defies explanation, but feels undeniably perfect. 

“I will always choose you over anything else, James.” You nuzzle into his chest as you ravel in the warmth of his body and the security of his touch. His heart is singing the same song as yours and his head hangs low atop yours, pressing meaningful kisses to your hairline between every stroke of his hand on your back. 

The diner around you might as well not exist. All that matters is this connection between you - the bond that defies the boundaries of heaven and earth. 

“But tell me one thing,” you whisper into his shirt and James moves to better hear your low voice. 

“I will tell you anything,” he presses into another kiss on your face, still holding you close. 

“Are you... did the-“ you’re not sure how to assemble the questions inside your mind without being bold. But James seems to know exactly what it is you want to say. 

He takes both his hands from around you and guides your face to his until his warm lips press a meaningful kiss to yours. “Yes,” he murmurs softly, yet steadily, conveying just enough seriousness to let you know how important and truthful his answer is. “I did what I promised. I am yours until the end of my life, and even beyond, my soul will be seeking yours for eternity. But until then, we will grow old together and finally be what we were meant to.”

His lips latch onto yours a second time and as the kiss deepens, a sense of completeness washes over you. In James’s arms, you find the solace and passion you have been yearning for, a promise of love that transcends all else. 

“I can’t begin to tell you how much it means to me.” You smile back between kisses.

James pulls you even closer, his voice a gentle murmur against your lips. “We have a lifetime to show each other.”

And in that moment, surrounded by the echoes of a bustling diner and the warmth of his embrace, you know that no matter the trials ahead, this love will endure, defying all boundaries and transcending every limit. 

❁ ❁ ❁

Because at last, there’s noting more freeing than falling itself.

🫵 You cant get enough of this character? Go check out the chatbot I made for him! This way you can explore different endlings, plotlines, or just enjoy his company for a while longer 💕

Lord, can we take a second and appreciate these images???!! Got me on my knees - and not for praying, I'll tell you this much...

Hello, loves. As always, thank you so much for taking the time to read my work. I hope you had fun! Maybe... juuuust maybe if you want to, you could leave a comment or reblog on this post. New fics will be on hiatus until August, I have some real life work to finish. But please feel free to interact and talk to me. I love hearing from you! Take care, and ill talk to you as soon as I can. ~Meg 💗

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[miss-oranje-disco-dancer]

sweet dreams

pairing: james sunderland x reader? (written in third person pov, v ambiguous description of nameless woman)

cws/tags: smut, p in v, cheating? or is it?, not proofread, weird vibes and a little dark ig, but it's just the mood of the game

summary: james re-enters heaven's night and finds a woman who seems to remember him. he does not remember her. basically if maria successfully seduced him except it's not maria?

a/n: what is going on in this fic? idk

wc: 1.4k

Mary’s body lies cold in the backseat despite the blanket covering her. He will not find her in the gardens, the old apartment, or any hotel room. Only in a videotape in which she turns to static before it ends. 

The only warmth he has is the jacket he wears. Until he returns to Heaven’s Night. A certain familiarity struck him when he entered the building for the first time. Maybe it’s the stench of liquor, drawing him toward another reality, one void of grief. Maybe it’s the neon lights, the metal pole, a discarded bra. Maybe he’s been here before. The woman sitting at the bar looks at him as if he has. 

“James,” she says with an inviting smile. 

“How do you know my name?” he asks, taking cautious, yet steady steps in her direction. 

“How does anyone know anyone else’s name?” 

“Is that a riddle?”

“No, that was just a question. I’m not trying to trick you, James. I learned your name when you introduced yourself to me.”

“I don’t remember doing that. I don’t remember meeting you at all.”

“You’ve forgotten me already?” Her expression drops, every part of her face is disappointed. 

“I’m sorry. I’m just going through a lot right now. Don’t take it personally.” He finds himself reaching out his hand and placing it on her shoulder in an attempt to comfort her. 

“Let’s start over,” he suggests. 

She nods and pulls herself together. 

He holds out his hand, and she takes it into her own. Her hands are soft minus the sharp tips of her acrylic nails that tickle his skin. 

“You’re cold,” she remarks, and he cannot decide if her pout pities or mocks him. 

“No, I’m James,” he says, forcing the creases of his lips to turn upwards into something resembling a smile. “Remember?”

“Of course,” she says with a breathy giggle. 

“Now, how about you tell me your name?”

“You know people like me don’t give out our real names, don’t you?”

People like you… it takes him a moment to realize what she means: sex workers. 

“Oh. That’s right. But I’m guessing you have an alias or something.”

“I’ve been called many names. ‘Angel’ when I’m here at Heaven’s Night, ‘Kitty’ at The Catwalk, ‘Jade’ at Jewels, ‘Baby’ by some former lovers. Call me whatever you like.”

Choosing someone else’s name was not something he’d prepared for and it leaves him stumped for a moment. 

“Don’t overthink it,” she says cupping his cheek with her hand. “As long as it’s not Mary…” 

“Why not Mary?” He flinches at the sound of her name. 

She pretends like she didn’t hear him, and pays no mind to his nerves, shrugging them off as she leads him to a seat in front of the stage. 

He follows her, eyes stuck on her curves. He startles when she pushes him onto the loveseat. 

“James, baby,” she says, her voice softer, but just as sultry. “Why are you so nervous? You want this, don’t you?”

“I just feel like I shouldn’t, that’s all.”

“Your mind is playing tricks on you, then. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to see what a woman has to offer. It’s like window shopping, there’s no harm in looking.”

Before he can say anything else she finds a boombox in the corner and sets it up - in doing so, she leans over and reveals a tiny strip of lace underneath her skirt. 

James tries to quickly adjust his pants as she’s turned away from him, but she must know he’s hard. What’s the point in pretending?

When she steps onto the stage, she needs no introduction, only the opening synth of Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This) to lead her up the short set of stairs before she walks around the pole, prepared to do tricks that James’ imagination couldn’t conjure up even if he begged it to. But despite his amazement at the way her body bends, even more so when her clothes begin to disappear, it’s the moment she sits at the front of the stage and spreads her legs, giving him a better view of the red lace thong he got a peek at earlier, that really gets him going. 

He didn’t know he was hungry until he was starving. 

The music doesn’t stop, the cassette runs its course. The scantily-clad woman straddles James’ lap, just hovering but close enough to feel the warmth emanate from her body. 

“I know I said it’s just looking, but there wouldn’t really be any harm in touching me, would there?” 

She takes his hands in hers and places them on her chest. 

He can feel her tits, her skin, her heartbeat. She’s so warm, and real, and alive. There is the childlike urge to squeeze them, to hold and let go, make them bounce in front of his eyes, but instead, he slides his hands down her waist to her hips, sitting her firmly in his lap. 

“You’re so warm,” he says without thinking. 

“I’ll be cold soon if you leave me like this,” she says. Then, leans down to whisper in his ear, “Take off your clothes.”

When he asks, “are you sure?” it stumbles out of his mouth and lands with a groan as she peppers kisses down his neck.  

She only hums in response. He removes his jacket and unbuttons his shirt so her mouth can reach further – to his collarbone, while her hands travel to his poorly-hidden erection. 

She looks up at him and bats her eyelashes before going any further. It’s her way of asking permission. 

“I guess… as long as we don’t go too far…”

“We’ll just get naked, maybe even kiss, nothing more,” she says. 

So, he helps her get his pants off and she slips off her barely-there panties. 

He feels alive for the first time in years when her warm body touches his, skin-to-skin. 

He doesn’t protest when she kisses him, he closes his eyes and lets himself feel something other than dread for once. 

She surely feels his need prodding at her core, but she must feel his guilt as well because she assures him, “If it slips in by accident, then, it’s nobody’s fault, right?”

“Right,” he says, completely under her spell, nodding along. 

Of course there are no accidents. This is a mistake, not an accident. James knows this, but when she repositions her hips, he lets her wet heat envelope his cock. 

“I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to…” she says, a tiny grin peeking through her faux-apology. 

“It’s okay, I’ll just pull out,” he says. And slowly, with a grunt, he does. 

He keeps a tight grip on her hips so he can guide her back to him. “You can sit back down now,” he says, with his cock ready to enter her again. 

“We’ll do better this time,” she says, rubbing her folds teasingly along his shaft before gripping it and sliding it inside her. 

“Sorry, it just, you know, slipped in,” he says, almost believing his own lies. 

“But it’s only the tip. It barely even counts, right?”

“Yeah, that’s right.” The music covers up his heavy breathing and her soft moans. But James makes sure she can hear him when he says, “You’re so wet, it’s only natural for it to slide right in.” He fills her in one thrust and it finally drags a long-held back groan from him. 

They can’t make more silly excuses when they’re both breathless as she bounces up and down on his cock at a steadily increasing pace. He holds her like he fears he’ll lose her and buries his face in her neck as if muffling any moans would take away any of the guilt. 

But he’s shameless when he asks if he can cum inside her, and she’s quick to say, ‘yes’. 

Though he’s as warm as ever, he shudders through his climax. After being pent-up for so long, he has a dizzyingly intense orgasm. What keeps him grounded is each squeeze of her walls around him and the sting of her nails digging into his skin as she cums at the same time he does. 

The guilt returns along with confusion when she stands back up to get dressed. He follows her lead, but once his shirt is halfway-buttoned, he freezes, looking over at her for some sort of explanation, some sort of direction. 

“What?” she asks, brushing off her skirt as she sits down at the bar. 

“Nothing. I just- I don’t think we should’ve done that.”

“Don’t feel guilty, James. You said you were looking for someone, and you found someone.”

“No, I meant I was looking for-”

“Love? Comfort? Absolution?” She laughs differently now. “You won’t get those here.”

“No, for my wife…”

“Mary?”

“Yeah, do you know her?”

“Not anymore.”

Like everything else, she is swallowed up by the fog. 

[kitty-tea]

Like father, like son

Welcome to the third and final part of the story!

Here’s part one and part two

(Link to masterlist)

Summary: James finally gets what he wants.

A/n: thank you to everyone who’s read the story so far! Sorry this is so long and full of filthy, smutty goodness :)

Pairing: dilf!James Potter x reader

NSFW 18+ only!

Word count: 5.4k

Tags/warnings: dilf!James Potter, super long, unprotected sex, age gap, low-key unhinged, almost-somnophilia, pet names, extremely filthy smut, NSFW, oral sex, p in v sex, teasing, reader is of age, dub-con (depends on how you look at it)

Hey, how have you been? It’s been a while since we’ve spoken to each other. I know you’ve been busy with the Auror Recruitment Programme. Dad and I are really happy for you. We both miss you very much, and it would mean a lot to me if you would come to our house for my 18th birthday. We know you’re very busy, so it’ll just be dinner with the three of us and we’ll let you leave the next morning. We’ll even let you sleep on the pull-out couch just like old times.

-Your friend, Harry

You stared at the letter in your hand that Hedwig had dropped onto your kitchen counter after you let her in. The words “we both miss you very much” stuck out to you. You were reminded of how fast time passed since Lily’s death. The first month after it happened, the three of you were a complete mess. James had gotten a letter from Professor McGonagall saying that Harry’s grades were starting to slip, and he was in danger of having to repeat sixth year on top of getting kicked off the Quidditch team (something that upset both you and James as former players for the same team) if something wasn’t done about it. With you out of school and unable to spend as much time with him, there was nothing you could do for him other than to keep sending him letters of encouragement. Luckily for him, his supportive group of friends were more than willing to help him get back to his feet and help keep him on track to graduating. You still understood that neither James nor his son would ever get over Lily’s death because you never got over your parent’s deaths. You understood each other’s pain. You’d never be that type of person to tell someone to get over a loved one’s death no matter how long ago it was.

You scribbled your response to Harry’s letter promising him that you’ll be at his house, and tied the parchment around Hedwig’s ankle before sending her off.

You sat still on your chair with a dreamy feeling inside of you. If you were a cartoon character, there would be hearts in place of your eyes. That dreamy feeling only swelled within you more by each day until it was the day for you to see James.

James felt selfish for using his son’s birthday as an excuse to see you. He was the one who brought you up during dinner, casually mentioning that you hadn’t spoken with them in a long time. He then mentioned that with Harry’s birthday coming up, it would be the perfect opportunity for you to spend time together.

That’s how he found himself answering the door at six in the evening. His heart somersaulted into his stomach at the sight of you.

“Oh, hi James.” His eyes didn’t overlook the way your cheeks turned as pink as the sunset or the same shy smile you started giving him all those years ago.

“Come in, Harry’s inside setting the table.” He stepped aside as you walked in with your overnight bag slung onto your shoulder.

James didn’t care if you caught his eyes hungrily exploring your body. Actually, he wanted you to catch him, so he could see how you’d react. Would you blush an even deeper shade of red and turn away? Or would you boldly hold his stare?

And what the hell were you wearing? You were (definitely) trying to seduce him with the tiny skirt that almost showed the plump skin of your ass and that white blouse that was high enough to show your belly button and exposed your shoulders. There was no way you were wearing a bra with the way your nipples were showing through the soft fabric, just tempting James to reach his thumb out and rub it over the hard peaks.

He then realized he couldn’t remember how long it’d been since he let his mind wander to you as he’d pleasure himself in the privacy of his own room.

He really needed to get himself together. He was not about to let his inappropriate thoughts about you slip out in front of his son.

“Happy birthday!” Your voice snapped James out of his thoughts as he saw you run over to Harry and give him a hug.

“I’m glad you could make it!” He returned your hug. “Come on, let’s eat. Aren’t you starving?”

“I know you are.” You rolled your eyes and laughed, only to abruptly stop with a blush when your eyes did indeed catch James looking at your body, specifically at your thighs that he saw you rubbing together. “Oh… yeah, what’s for dinner?” Your voice stumbled.

“My favorite, obviously because I’m the birthday boy.” Harry said in a joking snobbish way.

Throughout dinner, James sat back during most discussions you and Harry were having, enjoying the peaceful quietness without having to worry about the chaos that had been happening in the rest of the Wizarding World.

James didn’t know or care what time it was when his eyes opened to the sight of the still darkened sky outside his bedroom window and the dry, raw feeling inside his throat. He needed water which meant he’d have to go past the living room where you were sleeping in order to get to the kitchen.

Being careful not to make too much noise as he stepped past Harry’s bedroom door, he made his way down the stairs.

If the word temptation was a person, James was sure it would be you. His eyes gravitated up your exposed legs before landing on the hem of the short, pink satin robe you were wearing, your sleeping form undisturbed by his presence.

A more sinister part of his mind was begging him to walk over to you and untie your robe. One little peek wouldn’t hurt right? It told him, but he screamed at that part of him to shut up and that Lily would’ve been furious enough to come out of her grave to give him some sort of a spiritual beating and an earful if he did something that devious to you. It was just a thought. Not everything he thought needed to be acted out.

He wasn’t married anymore. He didn’t have to feel guilty about his dirty thoughts about you, right?

James found that his previous thirst for water was replaced by something else. He sat on the armchair next to the pull-out couch as he reminded himself about what he’d been taught: that men are allowed to look but not touch. But he wanted to touch you. His fingers twitched around the armrest as he imagined tracing them along your exposed inner thighs before dipping below the hem. Would his fingers feel a warm slickness or a piece of fabric? Were you wearing any underwear at all? It was hard to tell with your legs closed.

James couldn’t take it anymore. He didn’t care anymore that his conscience had no control over his body as he got up from his chair and the backs of his fingers found themselves brushing a strand of hair out of your face and down your neck. He made up this pathetic excuse in his mind that he had to check your pulse to make sure you were alive.

That excuse was so pathetic that James instantly snatched his hand back and mentally scolded himself before swiftly retreating to his bedroom.

Stepping out of the bathroom with your toothbrush bag, you adjusted your robe. You heard sounds coming from the kitchen which you deduced was James cooking something. You were right, for you spotted him behind the island where he was balancing a mixing bowl in one hand and holding a whisk in the other as you poked your head into the kitchen. You also noticed instantly that he was shirtless. And his muscles were on full display.

Although you’ve imagined what he’d look like without a shirt countless times, nothing could compare to the real view.

“Good morning. I didn’t see you there. I’m making pancakes.” You didn’t know what sounded more delicious: the pancakes, or the sound of his raspy morning voice.

You forced yourself to move your entire body into the kitchen.

You couldn’t remember how to speak as you felt your cheeks flame up and your eyes glue itself to his abs.

“Would you like to help?” Oh, you wanted to help him with something, alright. Just not the type of help he was implying.

You nodded and James gave you a smile as you made it to the kitchen island and set your toothbrush bag down. It was more like a smirk.

“What’s so funny?” You cringed at how your voice sounded like an angry little kid.

“It was like you were hiding from me.” Your heart fluttered even more inside your chest at the sound of his laughter. “Don’t worry, I won’t bite.”

When you hadn’t broken out of your trance, James brushed a strand of your hair behind your ear.

“Are you alright?” He asked. You weren’t paying attention to what he was saying. You were busy staring at every body part of his from his eyes down to the V-line of his abs that extended below the waistband of his sweats.

You also weren’t paying attention to how you were squeezing your legs together to soothe the ache that was starting to form there.

“Hey, relax. You’re all tensed up.” You gasped at the feeling of his cold hand on the heated skin of your bare thigh. You bit your lip to suppress a whimper as you felt his thumb gently rub circles in an upwards direction.

If what James was already doing to you felt this good, you thought the pleasure he would bring to you if he touched you in other places would be beyond anything you felt in your life.

“I don’t like what you’ve been doing to me, babydoll.” James murmured into your ear, his voice making you melt. “What were you thinking? Tempting me last night in that short skirt and your tits practically on display? In front of my own son? Everyone else thinks you’re such a good girl, but I see right through you.”

“What are you talking about?” You asked in your confused and dizzy state.

James scoffed. “Even a Muggle would be able to read you. You’re just as terrible at Occlumency as you are talented at Legilimency.”

So he did know about your crush on him… the question was how long had he known?

“Oh, I’ve known for a while…” James smirked, answering your mind. “Since I was married, actually. And I’ve seen your little sex dreams. They’re even better than those cheap porno films. Don’t even try to deny it.”

“James… you’re scaring me.” Your lower lip quivered. How on earth did things escalate this fast? You were beyond horrified that he could see things in your mind that even you tried hiding from yourself. There was no going back now. No more lying to yourself that you only saw James as a father figure.

“Father figure?” James asked incredulously. “Quite frankly, I’m flabbergasted that with all the magic you have, you never once saw the things I’ve thought while I was around you. If you would’ve used Legilimency on me at all, you would’ve seen all those filthy thoughts I’ve had about you that no father should have.”

“James!” You gasped as his hand disappeared below your robe and landed on your hip bone.

You were clenching your thighs so hard that you could feel some of the stickiness from your cunt leaking onto them.

“Open your legs. I want to know how filthy my little girl is.” He whispered and you obeyed. You sucked in a breath as you felt his long index finger venture into the crease of your thigh before using it to collect your warm slick and spread it up and down your pussy. You moaned and instinctively grinded against his fingers.

“Have you always been this wet in front of me?” He whispered.

You shamefully looked down. You didn’t want to answer him, why should you when he already knew?

“Dad? Are you in there? Where’s-” You heard Harry’s voice from inside the living room.

“Yeah, she’s right here in the kitchen with me! Don’t come in yet! We’re both making a surprise breakfast for you!” James hurriedly interrupted him.

Really? You thought as you rolled your eyes. If things were to get more out of control, you’d be on your way to making a surprise baby.

You bit your lip as James slid his finger inside and curled them upwards hitting that deep spot within you that you couldn’t reach as well with your own shorter fingers. With his thumb, he rubbed tight circles around your clit, making your legs want to give out from underneath you. You didn’t know which of those two spots he was touching you felt better.

“Okay. Should I go wait in my room?” You almost forgot Harry was still there. What kind of game was James playing with you, talking to his son so casually as if he wasn’t doing something dirty with you?

“Yeah, we’ll call you over when we’re done!” James shouted. You let out an exhale as you heard Harry’s footsteps rush upstairs.

“Just look at you. My sweet, perfect little doll.” James’ eyes followed the fingers on his hand that weren’t buried in your cunt up and down your body. “Can I look at these?” He softly cupped his other hand under your breast making sure to give them a gentle squeeze.

You breathlessly nodded and tensed under his touch as he used his index finger to slide the robe off both of your shoulders. You felt your nipples harden into peaks at both the sudden air and James’ hungry gaze on them.

Your eyes slid shut as his lips left a trail of kisses that started from between your breasts and ended at the side of your neck where he started sucking on the sensitive skin. The harder James was sucking on that one area, the harder it became for you to hide your whimpers. With each pump of his fingers inside of you combined with the pleasure he was giving you on your neck, you felt your body getting closer towards the edge of something until you couldn’t hold on anymore. You couldn’t control your hips as they thrust themselves onto his hand. Your panting was shaking your body just as violently as did your orgasm.

“Oh, James.” You quietly whimpered into his ear as your hands found their way to his messy hair.

“Doesn’t it feel good?” His soft voice replied back.

“Feels so… good.” You pushed the sentence out of you as the last remaining trembles from your orgasm left your body along with James’ fingers.

“James!” You suddenly exclaimed, remembering. “Breakfast!”

“I know, I didn’t forget.” A smile broke out on his face.

He continued to look at you like you were the most perfect thing he’d seen as he helped put your robe back onto your shoulders and clean you up with a towel.

You were still blushing and avoiding eye contact with him while you were helping him in the kitchen, but that didn’t stop him from gently caressing any part of your body he could from behind you every few minutes.

You gasped every time his face would find the crook of your neck or his hands that would wrap around your waist.

Soon, James left to go knock on Harry’s bedroom door to let him know breakfast was ready while you stayed behind to get the table ready.

James came back (with a shirt on unfortunately) with Harry running like a little kid in front of him, dressed in jeans and a hoodie.

“I’m starving!” Harry shouted excitedly, eyeing his plate. You laughed at him, glad to see his energetic old self that you missed.

You and Harry mostly spent the rest of breakfast catching up some more, before he told you he’d leave soon to go to the Weasleys’ for the actual party they were throwing him where the rest of his friends would be.

James sat across from you while you sat next to Harry at the table like how it used to be.

“What happened to your neck?” You and James froze upon seeing Harry point to the bruise that was the same color as the jelly on his plate.

“I…tripped.” You promptly used your hair to cover up the area so that Harry wouldn’t have enough time to inspect it.

“You need to be more careful next time. The corners of the tables can be quite sharp.” James chided you gently as if he wasn’t the one that caused this.

“Oh. Funny how I didn’t hear you screaming earlier.” Harry shrugged. “You should put some ice on it.”

“Well you know she’s in Auror training and she’s been learning how to keep quiet.” James said with emphasis on the last two words with a sly look in your direction. He then got up to walk to the freezer.

He returned a moment later with an ice cube wrapped around a paper towel. You felt a spark where your fingers touched his as he handed it over to you, almost convincing you to put it over your reddening cheeks instead.

After the three of you had finished breakfast and Harry had disapparated out of the living room, it was you and James alone.

“Do you need me to help you wash dishes?” You asked awkwardly, shifting your weight from one foot to the other. “I can stay here and help. I got the day off today.”

“Or you could wait for me in my bedroom.” James murmured as he sneakily slid his thumbs up your thighs. “You could help me in there.”

“Deal.” You got on your tiptoes and gave his cheek a quick kiss before departing for his bedroom.

As you came up in front of the door to James’ bedroom, your hands started to shake as you pushed it open. In all the time you spent there, this was the only room in the house you had never stepped foot in. You were starting to feel awkward, knowing this used to be Lily’s room too, and the bed that was in the middle of the room was most likely the same bed that she shared with James too.

You started to feel anxious with all these thoughts that popped in your mind like, “What if James is just using me as a distraction to help him get over Lily?” “Does James want me to replace her?” “Would I be insulting Lily’s memory if I slept with her husband on the same bed as her after everything she’s done for me?”

As for what you thought about James, you didn’t want to use him as someone to just sleep around with. You didn’t ever want to replace Lily. She was a completely different person from you. That was it. She was a person with thoughts and feelings, not some object with mass-produced replicas. You didn’t know how to answer that last question you asked yourself internally.

You walked over to the bed, taking the time to run your fingers over the soft blanket that covered the bed. You then took in the rest of the room. You watched the tree in front of the window shade the room from the full sunlight, giving the white walls and floor the illusion of a blue-ish gray undertone. You noticed that unlike the rest of the house, there was an absence of pictures. You assumed it was so that James wouldn’t be reminded of the pain of losing his wife as he was trying to go to sleep. Besides the bed, the only furniture there was were the drawers, a vanity, and a desk with a chair. The only two doors besides the entrance were what looked to be the master bathroom and the closet.

Although you and James had known each other for years, you didn’t feel right to go and snoop around his stuff. But he did snoop around your mind. Is that any different? That still wasn’t a good enough excuse for you to go through his physical stuff.

You instead elected to take a seat on the foot of the bed with your legs crossed, your mind spacing out over to the tree by the window.

“I hope someone didn’t start without me.” James’ voice snapped you out of your thoughts. He was leaning on the doorframe, his glasses and side-smile leaning with him.

You shyly turned away as he took a seat next to you on the bed.

“You’re so pretty.” James said as he twirled a strand of your hair around his finger. “What’s wrong?”

He gently cupped your face with his other hand, turning you towards his direction. You nervously looked down to where your lips were nearly touching.

“Do you actually want to do this with me? Am I just a distraction for you?” You whispered the last sentence. You couldn’t bring yourself to mention Lily directly.

“No, Sweetheart. You’re so much better than that.” James brought one of your hands to his lips and kissed the back of it.

At that moment, James wanted you all to himself. He knew there would be consequences later if that happened. He could give you a choice to either sneak around with you behind his son’s back or go public with everyone else about your relationship and face the risk of shame. That was if you wanted it as much as he did, which he knew you did, but were you willing to give in and go that far? Would you change your mind?

And Harry? So what if he had a crush on you? You weren’t ever going to go for him anyways. James was the one who got what he wanted, not him. Not everyone gets what they want in life. Damn, he was thinking selfishly, so unlike how a father should.

No matter how happy or sad you looked, James couldn’t stop thinking of how gorgeous everything about you was, your eyes, your soft lips, the way your hair fell and framed your face, the blush on your cheeks that was as potent as the flame in his heart, it was like you were pulling him in without trying as his lips automatically found its way to yours.

As he got a taste of you, he knew he was instantly addicted. Just the taste of your lips wasn’t enough for him. He needed to hold your body close to him, so he wrapped his arm around you and grabbed one of your legs and put it over him, making you sit on his lap, facing him.

If he hadn’t required air to be alive, he didn’t think he’d ever be able to let go of you. The both of you were left panting as you got a look at each other.

“Take this off.” He pleaded, tugging at the string of your robe.

As soon as you took your satin robe off, he wasted no time in flipping you over onto your back, making your hair spill out below you and knocking the air out of you.

“I can finally have this beautiful body all to myself.” You mewled as his thumb flicked over the hardened bud on your breast.

“Aren’t you just deliciously adorable?” James let a filthy smirk grow on his face as he squeezed your breast and attached his mouth to your nipple, sucking on it. “I can’t wait to taste the rest of you.”

You started to squirm more and more under him with each lick on your nipple until you couldn’t control your whimpering.

“It’s okay, Baby. You don’t need to hold back.” James cooed.

He got up from where he was above you. He yanked his white t-shirt over his head before he pulled down his sweatpants, revealing the outline of his erection in his boxers to you.

“Do you want to feel it?” James took a hold of your smaller hand. Sitting up, you bit your lip and nodded.

“It’s so…big.” The way your voice sounded so innocent like you were discovering something fascinating only made the hardness of his erection more painful. James sucked in a breath as your hand gave him a gentle squeeze.

“Fuck, open your legs.” He commanded urgently.

When you were too distracted by studying the dimensions of his cock to respond, James took matters into his own hands by jamming both hands between your knees to pry them apart.

The sight of your glistening arousal in front of him was a reward in itself. But he couldn’t stop there.

“I already made you cum today and you’re still wet for more. You’re such a greedy little slut.” James purred deeply. “How about this? You use those pretty lips to suck me off while you touch yourself.”

Your big doe eyes only widened at him as your mouth hung open. Just that look on your face only made James want to cum even more.

“Come on, Babydoll,” He reveled in how nervous and tiny he was making you feel. “Don’t be shy. I know you touch yourself while thinking about me. And now, I’m right here.”

He took your hand off his cock. He could feel your eyes studying his movements as he hooked his fingers under the waistband of his boxers and pulled it down, making his dick spring out in front of your face.

“Get on your knees.” He easily pulled your smaller body off the bed and onto the floor, while he took his seat where you were.

There you were, naked in front of him, on your knees, staring up at his cock, like you were worshiping it.

James could feel your hesitation as your fingers reached out over the tip.

“You wanna taste it?” James brushed his fingers through your hair, attempting to relax you. You nodded. “Why don’t you ask?”

“C-Can I taste it, please?” How could he ever deny you, especially with you asking him so innocently and politely?

“Of course.” He couldn’t take his eyes off yours as you continued looking up at him while letting his cock slip past your lips. You then reached your hand down between your legs, touching yourself just as he had instructed.

He couldn’t believe what he was seeing with his eyes. You were there, really sucking his cock, making the dirty fantasies that had been manifesting inside him come true.

“Fuck, that’s it Baby.” James grunted as he pushed your head down on his cock. “You’re doing so well. You’re so perfect.”

When your wet tongue hit the vein on the underside, James let a string of curses erupt out of him. That seemed to encourage you to keep going as you wrapped your free hand around the base and pumped it in sync with your mouth.

A little while later, James could feel himself getting closer to cumming when his body tensed up.

“Keep going, Baby! Good job!” He kept praising you breathlessly as he stroked your cheek.

He finally felt his cum spill into your mouth as you swallowed it, some of it still spilling down your chin.

“Fuck,” James sighed as he gathered his cum that was on your chin with his thumb and pushed it into your mouth. He felt his gaze darken as you greedily sucked and licked the entire thing. “You’ve been such a good girl. Let me make it up to you.”

James pulled you off the floor and into his body, holding you close to him as he inhaled the scent of your perfume.

As you let the heat of James’ body wrap around you, he flipped you over so that you were on your back again. Glasses or no glasses, he was the most handsome man you’d seen in your life. You no longer gave a damn that he was almost old enough to be your father. Maybe you did have a type. He had made you feel like you were the most special girl in the entire world, and you never wanted to stop feeling that way.

“Hold onto me, okay? I’m going to make you feel good. Don’t you want that?” James asked as he kissed you under your jaw, making you whimper at the pleasure he was imposing on the sensitive area.

“Yeah I want your cock deep in my pussy.” James seemed surprised at the uncharacteristic filth that came out of you to which he raised his eyebrows.

“Fuck, I didn’t think you had such a filthy mouth to go with that innocent face.” James said as he brought his lips onto yours.

As he did so, you felt something against your entrance, presumably the tip of James’ cock. He wiggled around some more until he had finally coated his cock in the slickness of your walls.

“Are you alright?” James rubbed his thumb against the apple of your cheek.

You nodded as you bit your lip. You just needed a little time to adjust to him. His cock was longer and wider than anything you ever inserted into yourself. But he filled you up in the best way possible better than your fingers or even the handle of your hairbrush could.

“It feels so good James.” You were panting as you grabbed a hold of his shoulders. Another scream left you as James’ finger rubbed your clit, adding more pleasure to your cunt.

“I want you to cum for me, Beautiful.” James grunted as he continued to thrust his cock deep into you, making you whimper and moan under him.

You were now getting addicted to the full feeling of James’ cock inside you along with the stimulation on your clit. Your head was starting to feel like it was floating on clouds. In your cock-drunk state, you kept moaning James’ name and telling him how good he was making you feel, just how you did in your countless sex dreams about him.

You couldn’t believe this was real, and it was happening to you.

“James! James! Fuck! I’m so… so close.” You sobbed into his shoulder.

“I got you Baby.” He cooed.

“Feels so big and good…” You continued moaning sentences until it turned into incoherent mumbles.

The full feeling of James’ cock combined with the intense tingling on your clit had your walls squeezing around him soon. You started screaming James’ name again through your orgasm that flooded through you.

“Fucking hell!” He suddenly grabbed your hips, and looked at you as if something came over him.

He then pulled his cock out in the middle of your orgasm. He was kneeling above your spent body with his hard cock in his hand that was still coated in your juices.

With a couple strokes, you felt the warm liquid drip down onto your tits and your stomach. You were now painted with James’ cum, and he was the artist admiring his work.

Both of you took deep breaths as you looked at each other while coming down from your highs.

As soon as James had recovered, he got up and ran his hands through his messy hair. You were too tired to sit up, so you could only watch as he put on his boxers before he went into the master bathroom. You heard the water running, and not long after, James had returned with a towel in his hand.

“How do you feel?” He asked gently as he wiped the towel across where his cum was on your body.

“A little tired.” You sighed. James rubbed the towel in circular motions on your breasts, effectively massaging them. After he cleaned you up, he discarded the towel onto the nightstand.

“Come over here, Beautiful.” James opened his arms up and you rolled into his embrace. You closed your eyes as he pressed faint kisses on the back of your naked shoulder, making you shiver.

You were scared, but also excited to see what your future would look like with James.

Tags

@xcinnamonmalfoyx

[a-world-with0ut-dr34ms]

Ghost x City Girl Reader

After your car breaks down on you unexpectedly in the middle of the night, you're left with no choice but to call the only number left available to you... Ghost.

NFSW 18+ Shameless Smut, Porn w/ Plot, P in V sex, Intimate, Steamy Makeout, Build-Up, Banter, Drama, Flirting, Seducing, Dry-Humping, Romance, Hatemance, Enemies to Lovers Trope, Cheating, Toxic Relationship, Light Angst, Characters are Flawed, Ghost and Reader are mean to each other, however things start to change, can be read like a one-shot, but reads better with context

WC: 6.1k~

Author's Note: I finally finished this chapter! Personally, I like how it came out and I like where it's going so far. Since the hatemance has been established, the only way to go is up, right? Please let me know what you think though! And please enjoy~

Masterlist

NGMLTS Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Six

"Come on, come on, come on-"

You step forward towards the edge of the road, making sure not to accidentally step 5 inches deep into another puddle of rain water. There, your eyes catch sight of another pair of car headlights on the fast approach in the distance.

Its florescent glow expands like tiny, white orbs within the black of night, speeding by ever closer each passing second.

Perfect timing.

You stick your thumb out, using your other hand to try and wave down the approaching vehicle.

"Hey!" You call out, as though they can hear you over the sound of their own vehicle. The growing sounds of trees around you blowing in the wind like it were trying to conjure up a tornado hadn't helped either. "Hey, I could use some-"

The car zips by, carrying a gust of wind which insultingly hits you on its departure. You scoff to yourself, watching their red tail-lights slowly disappear down the road, and suddenly you're reminded of the predicament you'd just found yourself in.

That's the fourth car that's driven past you since your car unexpectedly decided to take a shit on you halfway through on your drive home.

Deep down you knew you should have just had your date pick you up from the jump; your car being a piece of shit had been a secret to absolutely no one. Just three weeks ago, the damn thing died on you in the parking lot on your way home from work. However, you've had one too many experiences with being trapped at someone's place without a vehicle to know it's best to be your own ride home.

Or that would normally be the case.

Honestly you wished you'd just Ubered now that you're outside, stranded on some empty road too far from town to walk but just far out enough to be an inconvenient for anyone willing to come get you, in the dead of night at that. But at least it had stopped raining.

Its residue still remains on the dark roads. You knew you had been out far in the boonies just from the lack of streetlights, seeing how pitch black your surroundings had been. It almost felt like a wall of sorts, some sort of abyss, boxing you in. It makes you feel like you're being watched (even though you're absolutely not).

Still, it motivates you to step back into your car, settling into your driver's seat with a frustrated huff.

By now, the remainder of the car's heat had been zapped out, all its interior lights completely dead. Some false sense of hope drives you to try and twist your key in the ignition once more, only to have your dreams retroactively crushed once you see the key completely stuck in its hole, just as it had been for the past forty minutes now.

It brings you to check your messages another time. You'd all but gone through your contact list trying to find someone that could come get you; that tends to happen when it's 1am.

You called your date first, seeing as he would be the closest to you and it hadn't been like you'd left on bad terms.

One month, now that you think about it. You hadn't noticed the time flying by, though it's not to say your time together had been anything remarkable. Just a change to your usual FWB and one-night stand order. He liked taking you out on nice dates and you liked going back to his place to fuck, and seeing he wasn't insufferable, it worked, for now.

However, his ringer had gone straight to voicemail when you called. At first you questioned why that could have been, but then you'd remembered him mentioning his phone being on the verge of death in the midst of the movie you'd been "watching". It crossed him out all the same.

Soap and Price were some of the least reliable men to reach at night, though it had only been because they valued their sleep, and did so like professionals. You weren't surprised in the slightest when they hadn't picked up.

You didn't even bother calling Gaz; the man didn't have a car. And every other one of your friends was either too far away for it to be worth the drive or just unavailable. By the time you'd called the last name listed on your lifeline and it didn't pick up, the hopelessness started to bubble up again.

But then you remembered one other person you could call, someone you're sure wouldn't even bother... if he even picks up.

Ghost.

The phone sits in your hand, purposefully procrastinating, as your eyes toiled on his contact name on your phone. Reluctant.

There's really no way he would pick up; he'd all but made it clear to you that he'd rather do without your being around him as is. What makes you think he'd want to get out of bed in the middle of the night for you?

And yet, your gaze lingered on his number.

Who else was there, if not him?

You slowly dial in his number, nausea swirling in your stomach at each press, until you've heard the phone begun to ring.

You place the cool glass to your face, listening to the other line ring, awaiting to hear that familiar automotive voice message system of his.

However, the air catches in your throat when you've actually heard the other line pick up, sounds of covers shifting and a man's heavy sigh filling in this period of silence that's gone on far too long for you.

"You do realize what time it is, don't you?"

You roll your eyes, sinking back into your seat as you settled in for this conversation. Welp, you called him, and here he is. Time to deal with that.

"I had no idea," you say sarcastically.

"Should probably buy a watch then," he teases.

"You offering?"

"No."

You can't help but do anything else other than smack your lips together in response. "I'll just keep doin' me then, boo," you say.

"A shock to no one, I imagine." You hear Ghost groan gruffly on the other end, clearly having been in bed. "So what then? Your date end poorly or somethin'?"

While he had been making a jab at you, his words were more revealing than he realized. Clearly, he'd still been thinking about you, despite wanting to act like you'd been the one bothering him right now.

It makes you giggle under your breath, though you're loud enough for him to hear. "It went great actually," you say. "He really knows how to wine and dine a girl down."

"No doubt letting a man actually treat you like a woman for a change is a new experience for you," Ghost remarks.

"Guess it just took finding the right guy for the job," you remark back. "He's got you on a run for your money, Manchester."

The right guy, meaning anyone but Ghost, he'd imagined. Not in any tangible way beyond whatever lust-filled mistakes you two continuously shared between each other.

Ghost pauses for a moment. You know your comment had gotten to him somewhat. Though he spares little time for you to rejoice in it.

"He can have it," he says coldly. "We're done, remember?"

You're not sure why, but hearing him say that to you yet again -- with not a heartbeat to spare, it only seemed to make your own heart run a bit colder.

Ghost only continues, his patience having run thin since talking. "Why are you calling?"

You hesitate to speak at first, your pride already having been bruised just having to call him to begin with. You sigh lightly to yourself, regaining your composure and cutting right to the chase. After all, what reason was there to be nervous? This was only Manchester.

"I need your help," you say plainly. "My car broke down and I'm in the middle of nowhere. I tried calling literally anyone else... but you're the only one who's actually answered. So... look, if you don't want to, just tell me now so I can call someone else, alright?"

Silence.

You have to look down at your phone to see if the man had hung up on you suddenly; it wouldn't have surprised you. But no, he'd still been on the other line, merely existing with his tightly shut lips.

After some more seconds have gone by, you've found the silence has driven you mad.

"Look, just forget-"

"Where are you now?"

That's not what you were expecting to hear. His words stop you dead in your tracks, your heart beginning to race once you finally had a plan in motion.

You sit up in your seat, already typing in Ghost's address into your Google Maps so you could get a good estimate of how long you'd be waiting. You wanted to cry when you saw the double digits, and nearly did when you read that 27 minute drive time.

You hum to yourself, trying not to sound too disappointed as you spoke.

"Well..." You sigh. "...It's not close."

"How far are we talking?"

What is he doing right now? He's been asking himself that questions since he tied the laces to his boots and slipped into his hoodie on the way out the door. He must look like a fool right now, he's sure.

Seven miles out had been how far you were from his place. Evidently, by the 4th mile out, Ghost had started to grow somewhat ticked off (seeing as it was now almost 2 am), but alas, he'd already been in his car and this far out, so there was no point in complaining about it now. Though he still couldn't believe he was doing it.

The night air feels good rushing through his open window. The icy wind scraps by him, leaving his pale cheeks a rosier pink, his short blond hair thrown about, and his knuckles a cold white, with the speeding swishing sounds of his car rushing down this long, empty road.

Ghost brought his balaclava with him (he had an extra one tucked away in his glove box), knowing he'll have to put it on once he's picked you up. Until then, however, he'd enjoy the freeing sensation of the wind against his skin, as it's the only thing reminding him that he is in fact driving to come get you right now and not just dreaming this.

He knew the smart thing would have been to say no. Ghost didn't trust himself almost as much as he didn't trust you not to try and escalate something out of this situation. That's how things always happen between you two after all. And yet... here he is on the road now. He'd ask himself what that was about, but he knew himself well enough.

Your car starts to come into view of his headlights on the side of the road, as Ghost has felt walls in him begin to form themselves, preparing for your presence.

He pulls his car behind you, quickly digging in his glove box and retrieving his balaclava before exiting the vehicle. It may be dark, but even then, he wasn't about to let you see him exposed so soon. Not like this, anyhow.

"There you are!" You step out of the car, dramatically swinging your arms out before slamming your door shut behind you. "You take the scenic route?"

"And I got gas," he adds.

You roll your eyes, crossing your arms as a cool breeze brisks by. "Of course you did."

Ghost looks you up and down unabashedly, seeing the attire you'd chosen to wear for your date tonight -- some outfit that wasn't too skimpy, but still left a lot for a man to crave more for. He can only imagine how much your date must have enjoyed himself with you tonight... it's started to make his chest tight just thinking about it.

"I didn't want to call you," you say all of a sudden. However, when you've seen the look he gives you after hearing that, it makes you soften up somewhat. It had sounded rather harsh out loud, didn't it? So you then sigh, "I wasn't sure you were gonna answer..."

Ghost sighs, the man simmering down now having seen you become more lax. Though he doesn't say anything. He wasn't quite sure what to say, because he would have answered if you called him. He did. Yet, admitting so out loud would make that something more real than what he was willing to admit. So he stays quiet.

You do your best to bring things back to ground level between you two. However, whether it be because you'd meant to do so, or just did not care for the weight of your words, you go on with your small tangent.

"I called Soap first," you say. "Then I tried Price after that."

"Ah," Ghost says dryly. "I'm well aware that I'm the afterthought."

"Maybe so, but... I called you still, didn't I?"

"And I still came," Ghost says.

You've paused for a moment, and your voice is softer than any tone he's heard from you before. It puts him on edge and makes his heart feel caught in his throat.

"Yeah, well..." You say. "Thank you."

Funny. He's never actually heard you say thank you to him before, and it's got him more giddy than he thought he would be.

"Don't worry about it." He approaches your vehicle now, taking a closer look. "So what's wrong with it?"

"I don't fucking know," you sigh frustratedly. "I've already taken the damn thing in for repairs three fucking times already and it still keeps doing this. I'm just sick of this fucking thing at this point-"

You kick your tire out of frustration, only to have the tips of your toes connect roughly with stiff, cold, rubber, your foot doing nothing to even make a bulge to it on impact. Immediately you yelp, though you tone it down, so as not to embarrass yourself in front of the lieutenant. No doubt he was in need of some more material to use against you at work later.

Of course, he can see that you're frustrated by the situation, and rightfully so, he thought. He never liked having car problems himself.

"Need me to jump it then?" he asks.

"You can try."

And try he does. The man's come prepared, having cables already packed away in his trunk for situations like this, having been here before. You step to the side and let him contend with things, assisting wherever needed, and sharing no other words beyond trying to fix the situation.

Once the cables were all attached to the batteries and his car was running, it didn't take long for the silence between you two to become defeaning.

You both stood leaning against your cars, staring off into the surrounding woods. Lost in separate thoughts that somehow always led you back to one another.

You kept looking over at him, taking quick glances with your peripherals. He kept his gaze ahead, not having wanted to look at you too much. Each time he did, he felt something stir in him that he hadn't wanted.

But for the first time in maybe ever between you two, it's Ghost who breaks silence before you.

"Have you thought about Friday?"

Naturally, it would be about work.

The word Friday brings a reaction out of you, reminding you of things you didn't yet wish to think about. This Friday. The day you and Ghost will be sent out on a month-long assignment together. Alone...

It wasn't like you two haven't fought together before; often times the others thought you made a great duo, in fact. Combatively, that is. If it wasn't his swift and collected movements on the battlefield, then it was your own cunning creativity which often gave the team the edge they needed.

As a whole team, it was easy to work with him -- you couldn't bicker if there were a million different things to pull your attention. But you wouldn't be with the team this time. It would just be the two of you now, a feet which had NEVER been done before.

You sigh again, hugging your arms to yourself to keep warmth.

"Don't really want to think about it, if I'm being honest."

"Will you be ready?" He asks.

"I'm always ready, Manchester," you jest. "What about you? Are you ready to be stuck with me for a month?"

Dryly, Ghost says, "I'm jumpin' for joy just thinkin' about it."

You chuckle at his comment, which surprises him, for some reason. Normally, your low giggles felt weighted with teasing mockery. However, the lilt to your voice now had been something more... welcoming.

And seemingly, you've noticed it's made Ghost somewhat more chatty than usual, given his silence earlier.

"So your date..." he unintentionally lets his words begin to drag. "You said it went well earlier?" He now asks, no longer caring how the question might come off to you. A simple answer would only suffice.

However, he already knows he can't ask questions like that without bringing the she-devil out in you.

"Mmm," you hum. "Wouldn't you like to know."

Ghost groans. "Forget it."

You're silent for a moment, and it makes Ghost think the end of that conversation. Though, you spend the time thinking, weighing between talking or silence.

"My date went fine," you say to him. "We didn't really do much. Nothing worth talking about anyway."

Ghost crosses his arms now, looking down at his feet rather bashfully, kicking a small pebble that had been rested at his boot.

"So do you like him?"

"He's alright," you say. "He's real sweet. Super understanding; I've never met such an open-minded guy before. Except for Soap maybe..."

You unknowingly begin to go on about this mystery man from before, describing him in delightful detail, all of which seemed to contrast with Ghost.

"I've never had a guy do that for me before." You said more than once, and Ghost was sure it had been true. After all, he hasn't necessarily been kind to you to begin with. Hearing now the differences it would have made only made him wonder of the what if's.

By the end of your small tangent, he'd felt your point had been made clear enough. But then you end everything you've just gone on about -- the compliments, the ups, and highs -- with a final comment.

"...Though... I don't see this lasting long."

He can't deny, that had actually excited him to hear, even as it doesn't make sense to him. Though he covers it under his usual, husky voice he wielded so dangerously. "Why's that?"

You look like you want to tell him the truth. You almost do, but it hadn't been a matter of pettiness as to why you don't quite answer the man. You instead shrug, keeping this nonchalant attitude you desperately wanted him to see you for.

"I don't know," you say. "He's kinda boring."

Ghost chuckles. "Boring?"

"He's just a bit too... simple for me? It's hard to explain."

"Not toxic enough for you, you mean?"

You laugh under your breath, having found some humor in his jab. "Maybe," you admit, sarcastically so. "Maybe I need a little screaming and petty arguments in my life. It just makes everything feel so much more... passionate."

Ghost just shakes his head. "You say that now."

You begin to smirk. "I don't know," you turn to look at him. "You must like that stuff too, Manchester."

"I don't," he says.

"Bullshit," you laugh. "Admit it, you eat this toxic shit up."

"You're wrong," he says. "I loathe it. It's unbecoming."

"If that's how you feel, then what were you doing fucking around with me then?"

It's a valid question, one that makes the man grow silent. What had it been about you that often turned him from his better judgment? It couldn't have just been the sex. No. Otherwise, it wouldn't burden him so much to know you thought of other men so much more highly than him, half of which being of his own doing.

Unsure of how to answer you, the man simply says to you, "I don't know."

The silence comes quickly, but it is felt by you both. Had another car not driven by to break this sudden trance, perhaps this conversation would have gone further. You both wondered as such, even as you wouldn't say so out loud. But it's the longest you've spoken without insulting each other. That significance would not be lost.

Eventually, your car managed to turn on, its dim lights twitching back to life amidst the night. Having not wanted to be put in a situation where he'd have to turn around, Ghost volunteered to follow you back home in his car. That way, if you broke down on the road again he could at least drive you back home himself.

You had been more than grateful enough to thank him again once your car had been running, smiling in ways you've not done toward him before in the past. In those moments, it had been easy to forget about all of that, having felt himself smile back beneath his mask, from time to time.

The drive back to your place is a short one, the roads having been empty, given how late it was. Ghost follows you to your driveway, watching you park at a small, one-story home you'd recently gotten on post. He remembers his way here without your guidance, having come here on his own so many times now. He'd even picked out a spot in your driveway he liked to pull into -- that same spot beneath the tall tree in your front yard.

Now that you were home, Ghost remained in his car, prepared to see you wave him goodbye before pulling out. However, you do no such thing, instead exiting your vehicle, and approaching his window.

He rolls it down, giving you a curious look. "Something the matter?"

"Wanna come in for a quick smoke?"

No, he thought. He should say no. He already told you he was putting an end here to this. An end to this toxic game of back-and-forth romance. What kind of man would he be if he could not keep his word with something as simple as this?

He would only be a man, and a human one at that.

Ghost has already stepped out of his car and followed you over to the entrance of your home. And just as he expected -- as he had feared and wanted -- once inside, having heard the front door shut behind him and the faint sensation of your body brush by towards your living room, he knew this wouldn't just be a quick smoke.

It started out with the two of you on your couch. The minute he sat down he felt the late hours start to hit him like a tidal wave, his eyes having grown droopy and tired. You looked the same, your movements having slowed since arriving home. Though it hadn't made you any less chatty.

In between grabbing a lighter and a pack of smokes for you two (a transaction that took you five minutes to do), you both gossiped about work. Ghost always knew you were a scandalous sort, however, it had shocked you seeing how willing the lieutenant had been to participate in the conversation. He had a lot more to say than you would have thought, in fact.

Once the cigarettes were lit, things only grew more random, Ghost feeling the urge to ask you the oddest hypotheticals he could think of off the top of his head. He had been serious when asking too, judging your answers, and providing his own afterward.

And while you two couldn't put it into words, at the moment, this had felt good to have.

You sink back into the couch, having finished your cigarette, and felt that final headrush. You enjoy it. You enjoy this.

You look to the left of you to see Ghost, his large body having sunken the couch down so much that your legs couldn't help but rest against his boulderous thighs. His mask is lifted, and his scarred lips finish off his cigarette. He blows the smoke out in front of him, as his eyes stay forward. And all the while, his body has felt every bit of your presence near him.

"Why don't we ever do this?" you ask suddenly.

Ghost looks your way, finding your eyes. "Do what?" He asks, his voice a low and raspy thing, vibrating through your whole body.

"This," you gesture around you. "Actually sit down and talk like this."

"You're not usually the best company," he says.

You pout. "Have you been around "you" before, Manchester?"

"I know the bloke pretty well, actually," Ghost jokes.

You scoff, a smile curving on your lips. "Then you know that he's an asshole a lot of the time."

"I do know that," he admits.

His honesty catches you off guard. You had been prepared to say something witty back too. Now it wouldn't work quite as well, his response spinning your mind in a curious way.

Ghost speaks before you, having been digesting this conversation in full himself. "To answer your question," he says. "I saw no point in trying to talk to you like this. You didn't like me. That much had been made clear, so I didn't bother. "

"So... you didn't wanna talk to me or be my friend," you say. "Yet you'll fuck me. That checks out."

Now you catch him off guard with that comment, watching his jaw tighten. It does so even more when he sees the little laugh you let out in response after.

"I'd doubt we'd make good friends anyway," you sigh.

"What makes you say that?" Ghost asks.

"It just wouldn't work," you say, and then start to grin. "We'd just keep wanting to fuck each other, I feel like. That or kill each other, whatever comes first."

"Wha', you can't fuck your friends?" Ghost jokes, feeling parts of himself bubble joyously when he sees you laugh.

"Not if you want to stay friends."

And there it was that Ghost almost felt the words leave his lips, the question and the answer. Who said you two had to stay as friends? Who says this has to stay as anything?

"Well..." he thinks to himself, looking down at his lap, as he lets his callous thumbs rub softly over his rough palms. He's now noticed your legs resting against his thigh, and how close you've been this entire time, your body heat having felt as cozy as a blanket to sit beside. "We haven't fucked tonight."

You smirk. "We haven't been at each other's throats all night, either," you lightly cheer. "A new record."

"This make us friends then?"

Ghost notices your leg shift, as you invite them to rest on his lap, his arms having nowhere else to lie but on top of them. Having them hugged so close to him, feeling your calves shift over his crotch (purposefully he's sure), quickly started to fog his mind of any previous thoughts he now had.

You watch his gaze follow your legs, traveling up slowly, making their way up your torso, past your chest and to your neck, then stopping on your lips, which you've licked into a playful smile. His dark eyes finally find yours, and he sees that familiar look in them. The look of trouble.

"I can't be your friend, Manchester."

"Why?" he asks again, his voice low, humming through you and making your body ache for him.

"I already told you why," you say cooly. "I want to fuck you too much to be your friend, Simon."

"Well, I already told you we can't."

"Then what's your hand doing?"

Indeed, this whole time you've let his voice soothe you, words be damned, you've felt his large hands slowly slide their way up your thigh, fingers grazing you roughly, craving to feel the flesh of you beneath your clothes.

His hand pauses at the brink of your hip, his body having leaned in more since doing so. It's pressed you more against the couch, your body slowly being caged by him.

Despite his actions, his eyes look at you with frustration, a million thoughts running through him. You were driving him mad, and he couldn't get enough of it.

You merely watch his eyes drop back down to your lips, and you smile. You lift your hand up, bringing it to his collar and letting your finger hook beneath the fabric. Your smile widens as you've felt his throat swallow against the gentle graze of your finger, his mask still having been lifted up to his nose, and his breath tickling your skin. You slowly pull him closer.

He doesn't even resist, his body moving along to your guiding hand, until his face had only been an inch or so from you, his eyes half-lidded and lost.

Despite the confidence you let off, your heart raced furiously in your chest. This hadn't felt anything like your times before, where the banter had been short, seeing as the real reasons for it were often carried out in swift succession. This had felt slow. Intimate. You had his mouth so close to you, and it kept buzzing in your mind, the whole thing that had him not wanting to do this from the start. The reason for this reluctancy. Some jealousy and measly lipstick.

"Kiss me," you say.

You swear you can hear his heart beating through his chest, watching the gears shift in his head and feeling the bulge in his pants start to brush against your leg. Rather than let him come to his own conclusion, you do the thinking for him, pulling him down by the collar and guiding his mouth to yours.

The second your lips touch his, it's as though no other actions mattered to him beyond having all of you right here and now.

Ghost kisses you roughly, letting his hands cup over your face and his body completely cover you, arms caging you in like a prison. The weight of his body takes your breath away, making you gasp into his mouth, as you've felt him grind himself against you. By now, his cock was already resting painfully so in his jeans, and you've felt him take that pain out with each gruff thrust he made against you. The second your lips have parted, his tongue has entered in, massaging itself against yours as though to have the complete taste of you with him.

As his lips did their absolute best lapping away at your mouth, the lower half of himself humped between your legs furiously, parting them at every motion and leaving you throbbing from each brief departure. You can't help but do anything other than hug your arms over him, hugging him close and letting your lips keep pace with him.

His body feels every bit of your hands run against his chest, hooking around his neck and lacing beneath his mask to feel his hair. Your legs hook around his waist naturally, hips jirating against his just as ravenously, as though you'd been craving him all day. The smallest of movements you make send him deeper into a passionate frenzy, turning the man near primal.

You wanted every bit of him right now just as much as he had wanted every part of you -- it had the man completely drunk in you. Large hands cupped so firmly over your cheeks as he kissed you that you felt consumed by him, neither of you having spared a breath away. His hands slide down your neck, making their way to your breast and aggressively groping them, reminding himself of the parts of you that you allowed him to misbehave himself with. The parts of yourself that would always be his.

He thumbs your nipples through your shirt, letting his fingers roll against them, and feeling your chest rise with each moan that it conjures. Your lips part again, your voice like ecstasy to him. He'd stay like this forever if he could. That's truly how he felt at this moment.

After a while, he couldn't keep himself from slipping his hand beneath your shirt, finally feeling the warmth of your body against his skin, before retaking your breast in your hand to continue his work.

By now you've kissed each other raw, your dry-humping having grown vigorous and hot in nature; the room filled with your heavy panting and his low grunts. Ghost's hips viciously pulsate against you, the bulge of his cock bumping in just the right amount of friction against your clit to the point that you hadn't even needed to feel him inside you to feel yourself soaking through your pants. Having felt it only made him press harder against you, as the man made an equal mess of himself.

It had felt difficult casting you aside with you so ready to have him every time you've graced his presence. Ghost knows he was making a mistake, letting you play with his emotions, but good God did you make him feel good when you wanted him to. You drip-feed him that lustful attention you give away so carelessly, and Ghost took each drop with begrudging starvation.

Your hands continue to curve behind his neck, your fingers teetering at the edges of his masks and keeping him pulled in. They touch the most sensitive parts of the skin behind his ears, parts of him that haven't been touched by anyone in years. Your fingers continue to slowly glide their way up, gently pushing his mask up more and more.

Almost as though to distract you from continuing with that action, his hands shoot down to your pants, as he's no longer able to hold himself back from you. He pries them from you, throwing both that and your panties to the floor, before lowering his own jeans down.

His massive length rested against your pussy heavy, almost like a veiny leg of its own, the man rubbing and smacking himself against you to his heart's content, groaning gruffly to himself each time. He grabs onto your legs, hooking them over your arms and letting your feet rest over his shoulders, as he pushes your knees back to your ears, preparing your body for a vicious pounding.

With no hesitation, once he's settled his body over you, he drives his cock in, his girth stretching you uncomfortably as he pushes himself so deep that he's felt his balls smack against you. The second he's felt you clench around him, your legs tightening over his body, and your lips parting with a sharp hiccup-like gasp, he lets himself go into his favorite mind-numbing pace with you.

Ghost fucks you into the couch, his cock smacking in and out of you with barely a second reprieve. Each time you've felt he might slow down, he only goes faster, making sure to hear the visceral sounds which left your cunt at each thrust, squeezing an orgasm from you that he's felt shake your entire body against him.

Yet feeling your orgasm hadn't been enough, it would never be enough. He kept the pace going even after, wanting to feel every breath that left you be wrapped in him, and every thump of your heart against his chest be because of him.

Through the sheer mayhem, he put both your body and mind in right now, you bring your hands back up to his face, returning his gaze to you. With your eyes locked, you can make out every detail, every feeling you each had harbored, both the good and the bad. He would have all of you, and you would have all of him.

"I don't want this to stop, Simon," you pant out.

Ghost finds himself at a loss for words, having replied to you in his head, and carried it out through action instead. He brings his lips down to you, kissing you once again, and making sure that you could feel every part of his reply through the taste of him.

His arms hug across you tightly, the quick and brutal rhythm he had growing erratic and desperate. He groans against your lips as he's cum in you, feeling himself pulsate against the deepest parts of you.

Ghost doesn't move from on top of you, having buried his face in the crook of your neck and wrapped his arms over you. You lie beneath him, your own arms wrapped lazily over him, hugging him against you like a weighted blanket, simply holding his heaving body to your own. You rest your cheek against the crown of his head, your eyes looking up to your ceiling as you've both now felt the dreariness of the night finally hit you.

You both pant, out of breath, now left with the uncertainty of what would be tomorrow. For once, you don't say anything to break the silence. You just let him lay there, and you do too. It would be morning soon enough.

Read Part Six Here!

My goal here is to start turning a toxic relationship into a maybe not so toxic relationship. It's gotta start somewhere. I just want to write about flawed individuals (it's nice feeling seen lol). But, I hope the dialogue worked, I really liked it. But anywho, that's it with my rambling.

@deadbranch @homicidal-slvt @argella1300 @poohkie90 @sarraa-26 @quincessimus @cabreezer0117 @glitterypirateduck @0-444-4444 @crazymela @13thprogenitor

Let me know if you'd like to be tagged/untagged for the next part! If I'm not told, I won't tag because I feel like an instigator! Thank you, uwu

[youareiron-andyouarestrong]

hello again from your secret santa 👋 let's talk about 🌶️ you'd like your gift to include some smut and I am here for that!

what do you like & dislike in explicit fic? any favorite kinks/tropes/elements for rebelcaptain?

ooh, that's a question

what's that post? about all the different interpretations of their relationship post-Scarif?

I eat it up like ice cream every!! time!!

I love to see them acknowledging to each other that yeah, what they have with each other they don't have with anyone else, even if they can't quite name what it is...yet

but in terms of tropes I like...well, as we all know, I'm a sucker for competency kink, just the two of them being extremely good at the respective jobs and the other being thirsty about it. I have to admit, the need to see Jyn watching Cassian be an extremely competent and scrappy fighter and thinking, "I MUST have him" is a source of never ending joy to me personally. @incognitajones wrote the ideal praise kink!Cassian, another perennial favorite.

Jyn and Cassian being extremely composed and professional in public to the point of being perceived as having no attachments to each other, only to be revealed that surprise! they're actually married, get your hands off my spouse (@melyzard wrote this, and it is still my favorite married!rebelcaptain story).

for things that I dislike, any interpretation that has Cassian being some kind of James Bond-esque spy that requires him seducing women left and right...I'm not going to say I hate it, but also, I hate it. get that shit away from me

[kandisheek]

FIC REC WEEK 36 – MONSTERFUCKING

AUTHOR SPOTLIGHT: antigrav_vector

antigrav_vector is such an amazingly creative writer when it comes to explicit monster fics, and I couldn't love them more for that. They come up with tons of fantastic concepts, and I especially love how they explore xeno-biology in a lot of their work. If you're looking for some excellent monster smut, you've come to the right place!

Here's some of their work that I think you should check out:

Collared and Bound

Pairing: Steve/Tony Rating: E Words: 2,804 Tags: Vampire/Werewolf Sex, Dom/Sub, Mating Bites

Summary: This is utterly self-indulgent trashy supernatural romance fic with trashy smut. You've been warned.

Reasons why I love it: The modern day Romeo and Juliet, except it's werewolves and vampires. I love how Steve indulges Tony in what he needs - or rather what they both need in the end. And I especially loved the tidbits about what their relationship means for them in the socio-political context. This fic is wonderful, and you should definitely read it!

Straight up, with a Twist

Pairing: Steve/Tony/Pepper Rating: E Words: 3,612 Tags: A/B/O, Tentacle Sex, Dirty Talk

Summary: The Avengers came across some weird glowing plants during one of their missions, and that has consequences no one expects. Steve, Tony, and Bruce got exposed, but only two of them are showing any kind of symptoms. Such as they are. Pepper doesn't know how to react at first, when she finally finds out exactly what these symptoms are. Both her lovers have tentacles, all of a sudden. They're also doing their best to seduce her.

Reasons why I love it: Pepper is really having the time of her life here. I love tentacles in all shape or form, and this version of tentacle anatomy is super intriguing. Especially the fact that Steve and Tony both kept their genitals. Definitely check this one out, it's great!

Tap (that) Root

Pairing: Steve/Bucky Rating: E Words: 3,735 Tags: Plant Hybrid Steve, Sex Pollen, Dom/Sub

Summary: Things go very awry on a mission, but oddly enough Bucky's enjoying every minute.

Reasons why I love it: Bucky being so turned on by the fact that Steve is restraining him with his own body is really fucking hot. The whole fic had me fanning myself, there are so many great lines. I hope you give this one a shot, because antigrav_vector and Quarra did a fantastic job!

Submersive Tactics

Pairing: Steve/Bucky/Tony Rating: E Words: 6,112 Tags: Bucky and the Winter Soldier as Separate People, Consentacles, Synaesthesia

Summary: Steve and Bucky have more or less managed to calm James down, and Tony's done with his upgrades. That means experimenting with Bucky and James' new ability to gain temporary octopus arms.

Reasons why I love it: Being able to taste emotions through your tentacles is such a kick-ass concept! I love the differing points of view, especially the descriptions of how Bucky and James perceive Steve and Tony's tastes through their newly gained senses. This fic is super fun and hot as hell, and you should definitely read it!

He Followed Me Home (Can I Keep Him?)

Pairing: Steve/Tony Rating: E Words: 7,748 Tags: Mer-Steve, Fluff and Smut, Telepathy

Summary: Tony was hot on the trail of the Xi'an'du daggers with Pepper and Jarvis at his side, when another startling discovery left him feeling like he got slapped in the face with a fish. Merfolk, it turned out, weren't as mythical as he'd always thought. Really, in retrospect, he probably should have known better than to think that, after all his experiences with magical creatures and artifacts, but, well, he's not perfect.

Reasons why I love it: I love the merman lore in this fic, it really raises the stakes for the smut at the end to know why Steve approached Tony in the first place. And the whole telepathic aspect is super fun too. This fic is great, and you should definitely read it!

[devils-servent]

Can you write something where the reader let's the boys stay but doesn't date any of them officially, but her and Sam make out for energy but they both want more so one day they kiss without the energy drain and its like HOLY CRAP HE FEELS THE SAME for a split second but then the kiss becomes more? Sorry if that's too specific lol,

I'm so sorry anon I thought I had posted this months ago! Turns out I had not!! And I’ve been so busy and distracted I did not notice. But, Not at all too specific! Wasn't sure if you wanted smut or not so I added a line break thingy in case that isn’t your vibe. 

AFAB fem!reader x Sam and this is written in second person so sorry about that if it's rough because that's why this took too long (except the fact that I didn't notice this did get posted so that comment doesn't really matter anymore :P)  -_- but I struggle a bit with second sometimes. 

NSFW: minors preferably DNI but you choose what you interact with so be wise Tags: L-bombs, Slight overstimulation, Creampie, slight praise kink, Vaginal sex, make outs, Crossposted to A03, (lemme know if I’ve missed a key tag).

This work was inspired by Michaela Laws' Seduce me series. I own none of the characters here and you should definitely check out her stuff!! https://www.michaelaamandalaws.com/links

Mutual love Word count: 1.8k 

The sun was beaming down on you as you led in your deck chair on the balcony, peeking down at some of the brothers relaxing in the garden. You smiled as Matthew and Sam began having a water fight much to Erik's chagrin as he was attempting to sunbathe.

“Will you pair quit it?” 

Times like this you were really glad you allowed the boys to stay, no matter how daunting that decision actually was at the time. They were like a little family and you cared for them as if they were their brothers. Except Sam, you felt something more for him. It started small, with you casting lingering looks on his broad, strong frame. Then it grew to deciding to seek his company over his brothers, even when you had first met and he wasn’t too keen on you at all!. You had such a huge crush on him even if you struggled to admit that to yourself. It sucked though. you were almost certain he didn’t feel the same way, why would he? He was an Incubus! he could have literally anyone he wanted and it was unlikely that was you. 

You knew how he felt, how he tasted on your lips, he had made out with you in the past but it was always because he was starving. Like when you first met, and he robbed your first kiss, igniting a desire in you, one you had long thought you lacked. Or before he fought Malix after he had a shower and you were delivering dinner. But it was always a kiss and nothing more. 

You Sighed and got up, meandering down the stairs to the kitchen. Glancing out of the window and saw James and Damien had joined the other three brothers and they sat at the bottom of the garden talking. That is cute. You plodded over to the toaster in the corner and popped a bagel in and sighed gently, slightly slumped over the counter.

You knew you should probably tell him at some point, lest lose the chance at all. But it was easier said than done. If you just waited for the right moment, the perfect opportunity then maybe just maybe…

“Heya Doofus, Whatcha doing?” 

Sam strode in, shutting the patio doors behind him, plopping himself beside you. He was shirtless, only in his shorts, skin slightly tacky where he had been goofing around. You gave a coy smile at him, gesturing vaguely to the toaster. 

“Cooking, obviously” 

You jumped a little as the bagel popped out, laughing at yourself. Sam had no response, he just looked at you. There was a strange look in his eye, one you were hesitant to identify. Your breath shallows, stepping back a little intimidated. Sam stepped forward, filling the space you had created and you bump into the counter behind you. He brought his arm above you resting it on the cabinet and effectively pinning you in place. 

“Umm, Sam I-”

He cupped your chin and brought your lips up to his, gently grazing them with his own. Your heart was pounding, you could feel it in your ear drums. He probably needed energy, hence the strange demeanour. 

“Is this okay? Do you mind if I kiss you?” 

You nodded gently, anticipating the energy drain. His lips met yours in a gentle kiss, one distinctly lacking something. 

“Wait, where's the energy drain? I thought you needed energy?”

Sam sighed and pulled back, standing awkwardly in front of you. 

“I mean I could take your energy if you want me too but I’m- I…”  He sighed deeply, taking your hand in his and smoothing his fingers over your knuckles. “I love you (Y/N). and I’ve known for a while and it's okay if you don’t. We can keep the dynamic we had. But- I love you. And, I'd like something more, we can take it slow go at your pace but I-” 

You cut him off, your hand snaking to the back of his head and pulling him down to your level and kissing him. “I Love you too, I knew I did- i just never thought you would feel the same.” you smiled tearfully. 

The corner of his mouth twitched into a grin. You were pulled into a kiss. It was sloppy and eager. You raked your hands through his hair and pulled him closer. Pulling away and gasping, cheeks flushed and lips glistening. His hands wandered down your hips, cupping your butt and picking you up. 

“Come on, let's go upstairs and talk” 

He had teleported you upstairs and plopped you down on the bed. His lips found yours again as his hands wandered your body. Fingers dipping into the waistband of your pyjamas and finding your underwear. Running the pad of his fingers down over the seams caused you to let out a whimper. 

“Please, Sam! I-” 

Cutting you off with his lips, you could feel his smirk as he kissed your cheek. His kisses trailed down your neck and onto your chest where he cupped your breasts through your shirt. As he pulled off your shirt slowly, with small teasing touches, before smiling at the sight. He gave you a slow kiss on the lips before pulling away and pushing you down onto the bed. 

“We’re supposed to be talking,” he said, chuckling at your flushed expression. 

You relaxed, settling into the bed, turning to look at Sam beside you. “I can’t believe you love me too”

He smiled and brought you closer “Why wouldn’t I? You’re all I've wanted since we set foot in this house and that will never change” he wrapped his arms around your waist cuddling his face into your neck as he shifted to be the big spoon. You settled into his touch, happy and content that your feelings were reciprocated. 

You had stripped down into a shirt and your underwear and him just his pyjama pants and just cuddled for a while. You just basked in the others presence and mutual feeling for each other, idly discussing your crushes on each other and everything you want to do together. 

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

Soon, his hands began to wander. His hands travelled down your waist, fingers creeping up your shirt and tracing the waistband of your underwear. You sucked in a breath at his touch and pushed your hips into his hands, tilting your head to meet his lips ghosting them over his. 

“Are you sure you want to…” he started, a blush creeping across his face as he took heavy breaths. 

You answered him with a kiss and you felt his smirk against your lips and he shifted to sit up and pulled you onto his lap. You subconsciously began to grind your hips into his feeling his rock hard cock through your panties. You let out a soft moan that was captured by his mouth, soon getting lost in the feeling of his mouth on yours and his cock teasing your pussy. 

Sam’s eyes began to glow a soft gold and warmth pumped through your body. You didn’t notice when he pulled your panties down, you just felt a finger circle clit as you rolled your hips. You buried your head into his neck. Crying out his name as he teased you. 

“Aww, Your so wet and so needy, do you want me to fuck you?” he breathed, voice deep with poorly restrained arousal. He moved his hands, one supported your waist and one wrapped around his own cock as he rubbed it along your entrance. “You're so soaked, you want this cock don’t you”. 

Crying out as he teased, you were barely able to marshall your tongue into responding a weak “yes, please Aomaris” Your use of his demon name set something off in him. He makes a noise somewhere between a moan and a growl as he slides into you with ease. Rolling his hips gently into you at first, cautiously watching for signs of discomfort. Your fingers found their way into his hair. Looking him in the eyes as you cried out for him to go faster. He did what he was told, hips moving at a speed you did not think was possible. His hand had moved back to circle your clit and you gasped at the sensation. Thrusting your hips into his hand desperately. 

Your eyes were screwed shut, panting as he drove you to your orgasm. As sweat began to bead and drip down your forehead, Sam looked at you lovingly. “You’re so beautiful, do you know that doofus? And you’re all mine.” he pulled his bottom lip in-between his teeth, biting as he attempted to control his thrusts.  

Arching your back, you attempted to get him in deeper–pushing your cunt flush against his hips. You open your eyes and reach towards him, placing your palm upon his chest. You admired his chiselled chest. You needed him. “Need it Harder…” You begged.

His eyes screwed shut barely maintaining his control. When Sam opened his eyes, the emerald green had been all but washed away, leaving nothing but dark pupils in their wake. He pulled out of you and flipped you, your face now buried into the pillows on your bed. You arched your back teasingly, spreading your legs weakly as your wetness dripping down your legs. 

Sam cupped your pussy with his hand, running his thumb over your flushed and dripping hole. He plunged his hips up and pushed into you with desperation “Is this what you needed?” The growl that left his throat, only pushed you closer to the edge. He continued to thrust into you his hands grasping at your ass and then tracing your spine. His consistent teasing touches made you melt into the bed beneath you. 

“Please don’t stop, Sam I’m gonna…” He pulled you up from the bed, spreading your legs and pressing his chest into your back and burying his head in your neck without his cock ever leaving you. He dropped his hand back at your clit, keeping his pace as he encouraged you to cum. 

“Do It, cum all over my thick cock baby. Its okay” He kept going murmuring praises and saucy comments as he fucked you. “Im gonna cum Baby, are you gonna cum with me? All over me?” and with that you did. You clenched around his cock as he brought you to your orgasm, you feverishly rode he cock desperate to feel his cum inside you. Soon you felt it, his hips stuttering and plunging even deeper into you as he let out a deep moan. He teased your clit again, the over sensitivity leading to you cuming again and you felt your energy being pulled out of you as you came.

His grip was tight around you as you shook. Eyes shutting again and legs quivering, you basked in the bliss for who knows how long. Soon you felt the call of sleep and you settled in his arms, his magic rolling over you and the bed. 

“I love you” you spoke out, voice hoarse and weak as he pulled you off his cock and tucked you into bed. He soon settled next to you, laying a delicate kiss on your forehead. 

“I love you too (Y/n),”

[alcamcat]

Favorite position

The brothers need sexual energy to survive. And they know what they enjoy doing. What does their favorite position say about their character?

Warning: smut – Minors DNI

-I don't own the game or the characters-

James:

His go-to: Up against a wall. James is significantly more selective about his humans than some of his brothers. With his past always lurking beneath his facade, he is intent on making the best possible choice. He likes to be in control and it shows in the bedroom when he's found someone who lives up to his intellectual yet reserved standard. Having his human partner pressed against the wall has several advantages for him. For one, he can demonstrate his strength, show that he's the one in charge. At the same time, with deep and well-aimed thrusts, he will make sure to stimulate the points that increase his partner's desire to an absolute level, thereby also maximizing the energy gain. He challenges himself to hold on to his partner, but still seeks stability and trust. Because they have to trust and be able to rely on him being able to hold this position. And James will always prove he's rock solid.

Erik:

His go-to: cowgirl. The second eldest is not quite as choosy as his older brother, as he tends to look for other criteria in his partner when he needs energy. However, he likes it when his human partner is a little more shy. Through the training he received in the Abyssal Plains, he knows exactly how to ecstasy his companion and get them to deliver the greatest possible amount of energy. In his favorite position, it shows that he tries very hard to ensure that his partner really finds their satisfaction, even when he is sometimes more concerned with gaining energy than with pure fun. Because in this position, his partner sets the tone with his hip movements, can determine how fast or slow everything happens and move in such a way that they enjoys the act. But subconsciously he also shows something else with this position. It's not that he's lazy, he's trying to encourage others to take control and express themselves, which he still needs to work on.

Sam: His go-to: from behind. For Sam, in contrast to his brothers, finding a partner is rarely about gaining energy, because he likes to get it through rage, even if he risks getting into trouble with James. It is important for him that his potential partner is down to earth and not arrogant, even if it is a one-night stand. He likes to take his partner from behind so he can control his thrusts and accelerate as he pleases. He doesn't care if they're lying in front of him, if he's pushing them against a wall or if they're lying on their side. Contrary to what one might expect, he does not express his detachment or desire to instill dominance in them as he often snuggles up to them. He acts more out of a kind of protective instinct. In this position, standing behind them, he protects them, gives them joy and security, even if he seems rather rough and aloof on the outside. Above all, Sam shows that his partner can rely on him and that he always has their back.

Matthew:

His go-to: doggy style. Matthew isn't particularly picky about his partners, at least unless he's serious. It is important to him that people recognize his balancing act between masculinity and fun and honor it in a certain way. His favorite position shows that he likes it wild. It's the perfect position for him, especially for one-night stands, because both have fun while he has the speed and depth of his thrusts under control. On the other hand, he also clearly expresses his distance from the person whose energy he will gain through several orgasms. This position comes across as confident and dominating, which subconsciously is definitely something he's trying to live up to. During the act he can forget his self-doubt and the desire to be seen by others as a real man for the time being and control the whole experience according to his and his partner's taste. And while he has a favorite position that is actually most commonly seen as selfish, he always has his partner's pleasure and well-being in mind. He's proving he's capable of taking the lead and running the show, and it's not like his partner isn't getting their money's worth, as satisfying their cravings is something he never overlooks.

Damien:

His go-to: missionary. Among the brothers, Damien is the one who would most like to give up the need to feed off sexual energy forever. This also includes ensuring that he only consumes as much energy as is necessary. In a partner, he particularly values down-to-earthness, but also needs someone who is understanding and gentle. His favorite position shows that he doesn't want to lose sight of his partner. He needs reassurance to see how they react and to be able to respond appropriately. Desiring a relationship of equals, he makes a point of adjusting his position to allow his partner perfect penetration while staying as close to them as possible. As he pleasures them in this position with well-aimed, sensual thrusts, it's clear that he wants to anticipate their every need to make the experience as intimate and wonderful as possible. Damien is a loyal soul who upholds the classic values of a relationship and makes sure they both have fun without being reckless. In this situation, mind reading is more of a hindrance for him, since a person in ecstasy tends to have a confused mind but he has learned to block out these thoughts as much as possible.

[isuckatwritingsobenice]

you’re genuienly one of my fav writers! may I request the seduce me brothers with an s/o that’s a vampire? or some other supernatural being?

AHH OMG AM I REALLY? THANK YOU SO MUCH THAT ACTUALLY MEANS SO MUCH TO ME OMG 😪😪🫶🫶 i love you forever, Thank you so much for your request!! I hope you enjoy it!! I also decided to include what type of vampire they are. EX: taking inspo from Draculara from Monsrer High, or the Cullens in Twilight!

Warnings: death, blood drinking, implied smut,

Navigation!!! // Masterlist!!!

James:

You’re a regular vampire ( Dracula Coded )

He could sense it off of you, it was painfully obvious you were hungry

It was pretty dark out, and the club he was in was equally as dark

You don’t approach anyone, but others do approach you

You’re noticeably older, but not by much, maybe late 20’s early 30’s

In human years…

James decides to go over to you, what’s the worst that can happen? everything

Luckily for him you recognize that scent, and after a few drinks you’re both off to some cheap hotel room

It starts with a one night stand, one James usually doesn’t do, but you draw him in so easily it’s hard to resist

He doesn’t let you go, he refuses too

You two sneak off into small alleyways, hidden in the shadows where you’re safe

Usually if you ever go out it’s with an umbrella or long sleeve

rainy days with you are perfect for him >>

likes going to blood parties with you, which is just a fancy dance vampires have every few months

he’s seen you drink blood, he doesn’t partake in it, but he does feel better knowing you aren’t hungry

doesn’t condone you hunting humans but also doesn’t try very hard to stop you so ;)

Erick:

( Victorian Vampire )

Met at a demon ball

He was HOOKED when he saw you

He thought you were drinking wine until he saw how much it stained your lips and cup

He’s naturally flirty, and so are you

You two talk for hours about other worldly food is so much better than human food

He’s so sad when you leave :( but he gets excited when you appear in a library the next day

Cue him finding out you can travel through shadows and paintings ?!?!?!

Thinks it’s so cool and absolutely asks you out on a date

you go to a rave party when he watches you hunt

he’s in love

he helps you hide the body

he’s gonna marry you

Sam:

( Twillight based )

He met you on the bus …

not the most romantic but it was late at night and you were hungry

he watched you devour the bus driver

Of course you didn’t try to attack him but you acted like everything was normal afterwards

just casually started talking to him with blood all over you and he’s like ??? bitch wtf but like in a hot way

pulls the “ so you have plans later?” knowing damn well you don’t

you two end up having a one night stand, and the strength battle between you two is steamy ~

he does see you again though, it’s on his way home from work

he sees a dead body, he also sees you, he now sees nothing wrong and dismisses the complaints of noise, who ever knew? not him that’s for sure

you two hunt imps or animals a lot, you make a game out of it

he likes that you can be outside with him

shine bright like a diamond

Matthew:

( Draculara coded )

met at a bakery

you wanted a cupcake and Matthew asked if you needed help with balancing the cupcake and holding your umbrella together

it’s 80 degrees out

when you hand him the umbrella you step in the shade, and he follows slightly

you make small talk with him and he tells you he’s on the hunt to try all the bakery’s in the city to find the best cupcakes

you tell him the best bakery burnt down in 1857 and he’s like … come again?

he knew you weren’t human but vampire was not what he was expecting

panicked and thought you were gonna bite him

you did not bite him

he likes that you’re vegan though

at least you two can eat together, as long as it’s inside and not with a lot of sunlight through the windows

probably the most cautious about blood being around you

Damien:

( psychic vampire )

he actually loves that you can communicate telepathically

you also help with his headaches which he really appreciates

you two met under a bridge

he saw you kill someone and was like um… no thank you !!

but he did decide to give you a chance, he’s seen enough death one by a pretty vampire wouldn’t hurt

probably cuts himself on purpose for you

you don’t take the blood because you know it wasn’t an accident

he calms your bad behavior sometimes, messing with people’s minds and stuff

you help get rid of his mind reading powers

he loves you forever >>

[howyouloveyourdragon]

My Page

who's thea? - lol that's me besties hi my name is thea and welcome to my page :) - i am 19 years old and have been posting on here since late november 2022 :) - my dms and inbox are always open! - never feel too shy to approach, im nice i swear! ♡ i stalk all of your pages fr - i have been named queen of jace nation and i bear the title proudly - @aemondx has literally called me "a cupcake full of rainbow sprinkles and sunshine" I CAN LIVE IN PEACE FOREVER, NOTHING CAN HURT ME NOW🙏 - @officerbrowneyes said im like a funfetti cake 😩 i can live in peace - i live in a jace brainrot fr, it's his world we're all just living in it - @its-actually-minicika is my wife fr, do not be alarmed if she sneaks by 👀 - currently collecting as many parental figures as possible, i currently have; - @hopelesswritergall - @madame-fear - @aemondx - @worms-on-a-single-string - @pendragora

requests are now closed any requests sent in right now will be deleted and unanswered

inbox/ask box - is always open for chats and/or any questions you might have - matchups are not a priority, i am getting to them but i've been focusing on other works

accounts - howyouloveyourdragon on ao3 - @simp-aholic is my original account and where i'm most active - @howyourideyourdragon - asoiaf smut reblog account for my smut fics - @straddleandbone - shadow and bone account - @jamescult for impish thirsty hours of seduce me the otome main man james - @theacanread is my account for keeping track of the fics i want to read but haven't gotten to yet - i now officially have a kofi account @ ko-fi.com/sagethea :) i do not expect anything but anything would be appreciated!

icon - my icon was made by the incredible and talented @aemondx so check out my mama sili, their edits are incredible and so are they! ♡

header - my header was made by the amazing and kind @aegonx! please check miranda out she's too nice to me i don't deserve her😭

requesting rules: - if something is sent while requests are closed then it will be deleted and unanswered - if i deem a request too much or it makes me uncomfortable i will not be writing it but i will respond telling you,

i will write - platonic - fluff - angst - nsfw - dark/yandere content - age-gaps

i will not write - any minors unless it is strictly platonic e.g lucerys, rhaena etc - sexual assault - non-consent

my most recent fic

My Masterlists

- ASOIAF SMUT

- CURRENT MULTI-CHAPTERED SERIES' AND TAGLISTS

- Only Fair - rhaenyra targaryen x fem!targaryen!reader - Jessie (Jace)'s Girl - modern hotd au aegon, aemond, jacaerys x fem!reader - All's Well In Love and Enchantments - jacaerys velaryon x witch!reader x queen!rhaenyra targaryen - The Prince and His Corpse Bride - jacaerys velaryon x fem!reader - In Vows of Old (unpublished) - jacaerys velaryon x fem!reader x cregan stark

My Current Poll

My Current Requests

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My Character Taglists

you can find any of my fic recs on the tag ‘fic recs’ or ‘thea’s fic recs’

[thebestofoneshots]

If you had to pick a song/album that represented these Fics/Oneshots of yours:

• A Little Bit Of Paint

• Gilded Constellations

• No Sweeter Innocence Than Our Gentle Sin

• The Senses Anthology (I think thats what its called)

What would it be? (I'm wanting to make a spotify playlist that i can listen to you when I'm writing fanfic and or reading Oneshots/fics made by you)

Oofff, this is kind of tricky, I'll have to think long and hard to be able to answer this one, but I think I can manage. Let's fo one by one.

A Little Bit of Paint

This one is all about Siri and R seducing Rem, which is why I think it should be a soft melody, something haunting but beautiful. I'l thinkin:

Low Fang's - Blue Film Album

Wild Love - James Bay

City Grown Willow - Radio Company

Gilded Constellations

GC ultimately is a story about love and longing, and I've actually made a playlist inspired by it, so this now was easier to pick out. I'm giving you 10 songs here, but if you want all of them, I can post ss of the entire playlist, just ask for it <3

The Reach - Miranda Lee Richards

Born to be Wild - Steppenwolf

Don't Look Back- Boston

Those Nights - Bastille

Shelter - Finneas (Literally Remus)

The Anchor - Bastille

Wolves - To KiII a king

Chosen Family - Rina Sawayama & Elton John

Hungry - Dotan (Also Remus)

Diamonds in My Chest - Dotan

Going Down Fighting - Phlotilla

Scandal - Queen

Follow Your Fire - Kodaline

Warrior - Aurora

Happier - Banners

No Sweeter Innocence Than Our Gentle Sin

If "A Little Bit Of Paint" is a soft melody, then NSITOGS is absolutely mellow and soothing, but at the same time daring and a little seductive, after all, it's nothing but the devil tempting the poor innocent priest into debauchery. I actually have a few songs that are perfect for the fic.

Those Nights - Bastille

To Be Alone - Hozier

Power - Bastille

Foreigner's God - Hozier

breath again - Joy Oladokun

The Devil is Human - Aurora

The Five Senses

The Five Senses is very dear to me since it was with this concept that I started writing smut. It is an Anthology series with stand-alone fics in which I explore passion, desire and love through the perspective of each of our senses.

This one is interesting in particular because I even created a playlist of songs that could really get me to focus on what I was writing, so it has a lot of soft, jazzy songs in there, and some romantic tunes too, here are a few:

To Be Alone - Hozier

Spectacular Rival - George Ezra

Oil on Water - Bastille

Movement - Hozier

Haunt (Demo) - Bastille

The Beautiful Dream - George Ezra

Sunlight - Hozier

Shrike - Hozier

Glory - Bastille

Damn this playlist is just the same three artists repeated over and over

Hope this helps you! Share your playlist when you make it, I'd love to be able to listen to the songs you add out of your own accord.

What about you guys? Which songs/albums would you say represent Gilded Constellations or any of my other fics? I'd love to hear what my words make you feel on a musical level...

[lokisprettygirl]

Lose me to Love you (Loki x Female Reader) (AU) (18+)

Read Chapter 9 here // Series Masterlist

Chapter 10

Summary: Jolene continues to be a menace. A secret you had kept comes out in the open.

Trigger Warning: Extreme dark themes, Sexual abuse, physical abuse, public sex, Rough violent sex, 18+, Steamy stuff, Rough language, mention of suicide, manipulative behaviour, mention of trauma, smut, toxic relationship between main characters. Dark themes, cult stuff.

He entered the secret underground den and it was all lit up with the flames of several torches, he saw his father on the throne, his brother was standing next to him with a sullen look in his eyes, that was never a good sign, everytime Thor looked at him that way he knew he'd be in trouble, on the other side stood the other employees Clint and James. They were carrying belts and floggers in their hands and that scared him. And then his eyes fell upon Mrs. Waldrof, she had joined the center 4 years ago, she seemed a bit drunk but definitely not out of her senses, her daughter Tricia was lying on the bed in the middle of the open space, she was all naked.

"You called for me father?" Loki asked him as his eyes teared up 

"Mrs. Waldrof here wanted her daughter to be blessed, it's our responsibility to purify her and deflowering is the first step into womanhood, you know that right Loki?" Loki nodded as his father questioned him, he didn't want to be beaten up today. It still hurt when they had flogged him last time. 

"I gave the responsibility to Thor but Tricia here had a request, she chose you to purify her" The evil grin Odin had on his face was enough of an indication, he wanted Loki to fuck Tricia in front of all these people, her own mother.

"I …I can't .. she's just ..father I am begging you..I can't" he got on his knees and started crying, Tricia crawled towards him and she caressed his head, that made him flinch in response.

"Hear that my children? He can't. What a disappointment and then he cries to his mother that I prefer Thor over him" Loki started to cry even harder as Odin belittled him. Not that it was his first time but it hurt the same everytime he was insulted by his father.

"Pleaseee Loki..I like you so much, I know you want me" Loki looked at the girl trying to seduce him, she shouldn't behave this way, they were the same age but she was a virgin and he definitely didn't want to do this in front of his family or hers.

She dragged him on the bed with him and then she took his shirt off, he was so scared, he couldn't get it up and they all laughed at him, she jerked him off with her hands and she tried to kiss him but he was too humiliated to even respond. He looked at her mother and she was smiling.

"Come on son, get it up you pathetic excuse of a man, fuck her" Odin yelled at him and then he gestured Clint. Loki winced as he felt the first hit on his bare back, it hurt, the hit was so hard that it must have broken his skin. Loki laid Tricia down and he tried to fondle his cock to harden himself up and then he entered her slowly. She winced in pain and he wanted to stop but as soon as he showed concern he got flogged again.

"Fuck her like a man, bless her Loki, you're a god, you're supposed to act like one" He started to go faster as he fucked her harder, his father's voice kept ringing in his ears "Hurt her, ridden her of past sins, hurt her Loki, do it, do it, you pathetic disgusting swine" 

He woke up with heavy breathing and your concerned form staring at him so he looked around, it was just a nightmare, he wasn't back in the den, he wasn't that same pathetic boy Odin had raised.

"What's wrong?" You asked him softly as you kissed his neck and held him tightly.

"Nothing…just get off me" he snapped at you suddenly and you were taken by surprise.

"Loki?" 

"I said..get the fuck off me" you looked at him shocked for a moment before you got off him and he immediately got up to storm out of your room. Did he have a nightmare? He seemed scared and you just wanted to comfort him but he didn't give you a chance.

He sat down on the couch as he tried to calm himself down, just a nightmare, he had to keep repeating it in his head to get out of that mental space. He haven't had such a vivid regressive nightmare in such a long time, years in fact, and now that he did he could clearly see that day and what he did with Tricia that night, that nightmare ended where it did but that day he didn't exactly stop there, he did hurt her and then she hurt him too, it was violent and bloody by the time they were done with each other, all this happened while her own mother sat there quietly enjoying the show and thought her daughter was being blessed by the gods. 

He went to his room and Jolene was sleeping thankfully so he went inside the bathroom and locked it. He sat down in the bathtub as he really wanted to shove those images deeper into his mind like he had done all this time. He didn't want to feel so weak again, he pulled his knees up to his chest and put his head down as he cried as silently as he could so no one would hear him but his tears kept coming.

It wasn't just that day he was reminded of but several other memories he had from his childhood kept haunting him. He wanted to be held and be told that he wasn't at fault here, that he had no other choice but he felt evil for doing things he had done. He should have been stronger, he should have fought harder, he shouldn't have done what Odin wanted him to do but he was so pathetic like Odin said. 

After getting dressed you came out of the room and tried to find him but he wasn't in the living room, did he go to Jolene? You had no idea but you sat down on the couch and waited for him. About an hour later he came out, freshly showered wearing just a pair of black sweatpants. He didn't even look at you, he made his way to the kitchen instead so you followed him.

"Lokii are you okay?" 

"Absolutely..what do you want?" He asked you sternly and it made you tear up. The softness was gone, it was good while it lasted.

"I just.. you seem hurt" he looked at you and chuckled as you said that 

"Weak people get hurt you know.. people like you...not me" he mumbled as if he didn't even care that his words would bother you deeply.

"I just wanted to…nevermind" you turned around and stormed towards your room. After he heard your door shutting violently he groaned as he bashed his fist onto the countertop. He should have filtered his mouth but he never could in moments like this, that was one of the things that ruined things between him and Jolene. He always apologized to her but it wasn't enough. How could it be? She didn't deserve his cruelty and neither did you, especially not you of all people, you came out of the same hell as he did, he never should have said that to you. 

He tried to distract himself and decided to prepare breakfast and when he was done he went to your room, you were brushing your hair so he got behind you and held you like that.  He wanted to tell you that he got scared by a nightmare but what kind of man would he be if he did that? He shared a few things from his past with his ex wife and it only drove her further away from him, he survived that but he could never survive losing you. 

"I made breakfast" he whispered in your ear then he pressed a soft kiss on your earlobe making you sigh in response. 

"Not hungry" you mumbled as you still felt hurt by what he had said. 

"Okay give me that" he grabbed the brush from your hand and then walked you towards the bed to make you sit down, then he started to brush your hair. Reminded you of that day at the center when you wanted to go to the fair and he did your hair for you because your mommy was too busy with her therapy session and your daddy was out getting high and drunk somewhere.

He parted your hair from the center and started to work on braiding one side of your hair first,

"What do you want me to do baby?" He asked you so you glared at him 

"Apologize maybe?" 

"Okay, want to watch a movie after work today?" He asked you so you shook your head, he secured the braid with a tie before he moved on to the other side 

"What about your wife? Is–" 

"Ex wife" you huffed as he corrected you

"Is she going to join us? Because if yes then I'm not interested" 

He sighed as you said that.

"Come eat breakfast..we have to go"  He didn't say anything after that, once he was done securing the braids he leaned down to kiss your forehead then he left, you really didn't want to upset him further but he started it. 

As you all reached the set, you immediately stormed away from them, there was an actress a little bit older than you who had a scene or two with Peter and she immediately caught Loki's eyes. There it was again, the fucked up cycle you could never get out of, now with his ex wife in the mix it only got more awkward. 

The actress Layla was salivating after him as well, so once her shot was done and she was on a break she took off with Loki and you didn't need a third person to tell you where they went to. 

You could see Jolene looking upset by the prospect so you sat down next to her

"It hurts right?" You chuckled so she glared at you.

"So you must enjoy sharing him like this huh? Makes sense when you were such a whore yourself at the orphanage" your eyes teared up as she said that "Ohh you think I didn't hear about John? And those other guys?" She snickered but you wouldn't let her insult you anymore, she had no right to complain when she had hurt him like that.

"You know nothing so quit acting as if you know me or him for that matter, how many years you spent with him? Two? Three? You married him during the lovey dovey stage of your relationship and when he started to give himself to you..you fucking abandoned him" Your name was being called so before she could retort you got up and left her to stew within her anger.

 "Oh my goddd yess oh fuck yeahhh" the girl he couldn't remember the name of screamed in ecstacy so he placed his palm on her mouth, he didn't want a repeat of last time, his hips thrusted in and out of her slowly and then he increased his pace,

"Hurt me" 

"What???" She looked him a little surprised by his request 

"Just hurt me.. However you want alright?" he whispered in her ear before he sucked on her neck harshly so she gripped his hair in her fist and it made him moan in response, she took his shirt off and her nails scratched through his chest so harshly that it broke his skin. 

"Mmmm choke me daddy please" she whimpered against him so he obliged, how could he not, she wanted this afterall. His hand wrapped around her throat as he fucked her mercilessly, she moaned as he made her breathless in every possible way but he knew his limits, he knew how much she needed this.

They all did, they needed him to be this way and he couldn't fuck a woman without getting himself hurt or hurting her, even Jolene was into this and he thought he had gotten luckier, he enjoyed the soft lovemaking too but he hated how weak it would make him feel afterwards. He felt emotional, he fell in love, he cared about her, everything that his father taught him to not do in life he went against it to prove him wrong but what was the point? She still left him because no matter what he does in life now he'd always be that fucked up predator who had ruined those girls at the cult.

As he zipped himself up after the deed, she ran her fingers over the marks that she had left behind.

"Wow you are something…where were you all my life?" She smiled so he chuckled in response. However as she looked at the hickey on her neck she got upset 

"Fuck now I have to cover this" she groaned and he rolled his eyes.

"That's why I don't fuck actresses..Well get out of my way now" he walked past her leaving her surprised, shocked, offended all at once. His phone started ringing so he picked it up, he had found a place for Jolene so on the way back from work he took you both there, you could tell she wasn't happy because she wanted to stay with him and she wanted to win him over again. 

"It's small but it's just a matter of few days..I hope that's alright?" He asked her hesitantly so she smiled which was as fake as her nails were. He told her that he'd bring her stuff tomorrow and she insisted on going for a dinner together which only made you roll your eyes again. As all of you were walking down the stairs somehow she managed to slip and fell down, for a moment you were absolutely terrified and worried but as Loki picked her up and her eyes met with yours, that smile was enough to tell you what she was doing.

"She can take care of herself right?" You asked Loki as she was getting patched up at the hospital.

"I can't just leave her alone in this condition y/n" he told you strictly and that made you sigh. That's what she knew he'd do and she did it all on purpose.

So after all that nonsense she still ended up in your apartment, even worse now that Loki was helping her everywhere as she supposedly couldn't walk on her own.

At night you were browsing through the Facebook, stalking Jolene's profile obviously, she didn't have any pictures of Loki in there which confused you. She had all kinds of pictures except of Loki's, you heard a knock on your door but you didn't respond so he entered anyways. 

"Your ex wife doesn't have a single photo with you. How come?" You asked him as he got into the bed next to you, he peaked at the laptop screen and shook his head, what was his life now? He wasn't doing anything right, ever since Odin escaped things had only gotten worse, though he couldn't deny that you two had your sweet moments.

Sometimes he truly did wish for sex to just not exist so he could just love you and keep you close without having to label your relationship or what you two meant to each other, sex ruined everything, always, and he knew he'd lose your constant interest in him once he has given you everything.

"She told me once to not tell her friends about my past, that could be the reason" you looked at him as he said that. She was ashamed of his past. What a bitch!!! "I never cared about it, social media is superficial anyways" he mumbled in a nonchalant manner.

"Huhh? says the guy who watches puppy videos on repeat" his cheeks flushed as you said that, he was embarassed to say the least.

"No need to make lies" he picked up the laptop and placed it on the side drawer so you would stop stalking Jolene.

"How's her fake injury?" 

"It's not fake sweetheart" 

"Whatever" 

As he took his shirt off you noticed the red scratch marks, bite marks and several bruises on his chest.

"Layla said you sucked at sex and your cock is two inches long" he chuckled as you said that, he must have pissed her off greatly for her to be so upset with him.

"I don't care sweetheart" he smirked as he grabbed your hand and placed it on his clothed bulge "See .. so much bigger than your fucking petite hands" he whispered as he looked into your eyes and your throat went dry instantly. Teasing whore.

"Do you care about anything?" You gulped as you asked him, he made no effort to place your hand away from his cock, that you could feel was starting to grow bigger because of your touch. 

"I care about you" he whispered as he cuddled you closer to him, you stroked him up and down slowly and he stifled a moan that was going to spill from his throat "Such a naughty girl" he mumbled softly as he swatted your hand away from his member, your lips latched onto his neck as you tried to kiss each and every bruises one by one 

"What happened today? You had a nightmare?" His eyes teared up as you questioned him, he was about to get up but you got on top of him and pinned him underneath your body. 

"I don't get nightmares" you smiled as he said that, he was lying ofcourse but you didn't want to upset him anymore. 

"I do" 

"I know baby" 

"Guess that makes me weak" your eyes teared up so he sighed.

"I apologized for that" 

"Nooo you offered to watch a movie" 

"Same thing" he cupped your cheeks and pulled himself up so he could kiss your forehead then he laid down again.

You turned the lights off and laid down next to him but you made sure to undress first, he left the panties on yesterday but you took it off as well, it's not as if he hasn't seen it all before. He snickered at the game you wanted to play knowing very well that once he played his cards he'd leave you a quivering drenched mess. He took his sweatpants off and even in the dark room you could see the outline of his cock standing up for attention, and gosh you'd be lying if you said you didn't want to touch him, stroke him, suck him in your mouth and pleasure him until he was screaming your name.

"Fuckkkk" you muttered under your breath as he scooted you closer to him, he was walking on a slippery slope he knew that, he was so close to losing his self control tonight when you laid there all bare for him and when you smelled so good.

"I do admire your patience darling, you're such a patient girl" he whispered in your ear and your response left him shocked and confused, it can't be, you have been in relationships before, those boys at the orphanage, that man you went out with against his permission on your 19th birthday, you must have done it right?

"Well being a virgin pays off in such situations" 

As soon as he heard your response he got off the bed and put his clothes on, then he stormed out, he had alot to think about the perceptions he had made about you until now.

👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀

Taglist: if I am not able to tag you please check your settings

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[mycupofrum]

I think it’s time to make a pinned post.

Hello!

Welcome to my little corner on Tumblr! This blog is mostly for Harry Potter and Prongsfoot related things ��� and whatever else happens to interest me in any given moment.

I enjoy James/Sirius in a romantic sense the most. They are what soulmates are made of, and I write mostly about them. I also like Jilypad and Drarry.

I'm not into Wolfstar or Jegulus. It doesn't bother me if you're into them. I just block those tags. ✌️

I don't share JKR’s hurtful, transphobic views.

I blog/reblog NSFW content (writing/art) from time to time so I hope you’re +18.

I don't mind being tagged to ask games or WIP snippet posts etc. I'll happily take part if I have time, energy or any new writing to share.

My ask box is open if you want to talk about Prongsfoot or something else.

Sideblog: @mischief-managed-moodboards

Miscellaneous: #zodiac moodboard, #prongsfoot meme

Art tag: #my art

My fanfiction on AO3: English, Finnish

My writing on Tumblr

See below. 👇

Drabbles & microfics

The most logical conclusion

Autumn fluff. Prongsfoot, T.

Like a brother

They're so platonic. Prongsfoot, E.

Husband

James and Sirius spending a lazy weekend morning together. Prongsfoot, M.

Out of time

Sirius goes back in time and meets a certain Dark Wizard. Sirius Black/Gellert Grindelwald, G.

Imagine

Sirius confesses his feelings to James a little too late. Prongsfoot, G.

What it's always been

"We shouldn't have done it." James and Sirius fall in love in their 30s. Prongsfoot, T.

Regardless (I love you)

Sirius always makes everything better for James. James & Sirius, G.

Darkness

James battles with his dark side. Prongsfoot, T.

Grief

The Grim looked far more beautiful than any books had given it credit for. Grim!Sirius & Luna, G.

Guilt

"You never tried to contact Harry." Sirius and Remus have a difficult conversation. Sirius & Remus, G.

Academics

"Mrs Weasley says you can't tell Harry from James." Sirius & Hermione, implied Prongsfoot, G.

Jealous

He had an uncanny way of getting under your skin. Sirius & Peter, implied Prongsfoot, G.

Azkaban

"Hello, cousin." Sirius & Bellatrix, G.

Payback

James needs to let out some pent-up tension. Sirius knows exactly the way to do it. Smut, dirty talk, revenge plotting. Prongsfoot, E.

First day of work

James is ready to start at a new job. But he really should've asked the name of the stranger he had a one-night stand with the weekend before. Billionaire CEO AU, one night stand, hot boss. Prongsfoot, M/E.

The art of seduction

James wants to know how Sirius would seduce someone. Friends to lovers, one thing leads to another. Prongsfoot, T.

Happy tonight

James and Sirius escape the war for one night. Recreational drug use. Prongsfoot, G.

Permission

Time and time again James tore down his walls. Romance, light angst. Prongsfoot, G.

Jeepster

They had been sharing secrets that night, slowly moving from smaller to bigger ones. Friends to lovers. Prongsfoot, G.

One of these days

For two smart, brilliant blokes, they can be surprisingly thick when it comes to love. Oblivious James, oblivious Sirius, POV Remus Lupin. Prongsfoot, G.

Deleted scenes

1 (from Specialised in you)

2 (from A lesson in love)

3 (from Guilt)

4 (from Jealous)

My fics (Tumblr posts)

In the middle (Prongsfoot, Jilypad, E, 6k)

Birthday boy (Drarry, E, 3.9k)

Professor Black (Prongsfoot, E, 4.5k)

Out of time (Sirius Black/Gellert Grindelwald, E, 2.8k, WIP)

The easiest truth (Prongsfoot, T, 2.3k)

Just one kiss (Star Wars: Obikin, M, 5.4k)

Specialised in you (Prongsfoot, E, 11.9k)

Need you tonight (Prongsfoot, E, 1.6k)

Enchanted (Prongsfoot, E, 11.8k)

Practice makes perfect (Prongsfoot, E, 4.5k)

Fashion (Prongsfoot, T, 2k)

Surrounded by Black (Sirius/James/Regulus, E, 6.5k)

By my side (Prongsfoot, T, 1.4k)

A lesson in love (Prongsfoot, M, 6.6k)

Nothing like the feel of your hand (Ronarry, M, 1.9k)

What are best friends for (Prongsfoot, E, 2.4k)

Bathe with me (Prongsfoot, E, 4.3k)

[chartreuseian]

Rain, sun, and cloudy, please! :)

Thank you ❤️

💧Rain - What's the most emotional scene you've ever written?

Honestly, no idea! Most of my current stuff is less sad emotion and more happy, fluffy, cute love-y dove-y stuff (life is sad enough that I don't need to make more sads in my writing, tbh).

I did just write a big blow up between Helen and Nikola in the train fic that's had a few emotional chapters following it while they try to sort through the aftermath of The Thing. Oh, and I did recently write a chapter for Five fic set just after James dies that was very sad, so I suppose that counts.

☀️ Sun - What's your favorite part of your WIP?

Oh man, this changes daily! My current favourite bit that's not straight up smut might be the Five fic chapter I wrote a few weeks ago where the four of them are in Capri and it's gross and hot and Helen's being a pain because of it, so Nikola picks her up and throws her in the pool before jumping in after her (and then John joins them while James is playing at being a proper adult). It's just silly and fun and a bit of nonsense.

☁️ Cloudy - What inspired you to start writing your WIP? (or in general)

Train fic? No idea. Started it so long ago now... Five fic was because I had this image of Helen laying on a couch in John's arms one night and seducing James to join them. It was a scene that had been harrassing me for ages, but I didn't feel confident writing it so I put it off for ages. But the entire series has sprung from that single 'sliding doors' sort of moment for them all.