#secret alliance x reader
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animeyanderelover · 2 months ago
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not sure if youre still open for the single hc thing or not but if you are - maybe chae yul from secret alliance? :3
Tw: Yandere themes, possessive behavior, obsession, clinginess, jealousy, some Nsfw-ish stuff
Quick, little Hc's
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💜​Chae Yul's mentality has usually extreme withdrawal symptoms when you you are gone from his side which is one of the reasons why he normally clings to you tightly as if you are his lifeline. In a very rare case where you do have to leave his side though he has prepared an emergency packet to provide to keep him somewhat sane when you aren't with him. That emergency packet truly is like the accumulation of everything that is wrong with someone as terribly obsessed with you as he is. It includes a bottle of perfume that you like to weat. It includes a few of clothes that you have worn just recently and that he has stolen to keep them as long as your scent is still stuck within the cotton. It includes lots of pictures he has taken of you without your awareness and even USB flash drives with hours worth of footage that only includes you. It may show you whilst you are undressing, whilst you are sleeping or even records of the two of you during sex. That box is stuffed with everything that reminds him of you and is there so that he can indulge in anything reminiscent of you whilst you are gone to keep him from storming out of the house and follow you. It's only a temporary distraction so please hurry back to him soon~𖹭
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dearyuls · 7 months ago
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#. — chae yul x reader (she/her pronouns used.)
#. content warnings! — extreme yandere behaviour, failed recovery, obsession, stalking, kidnapping, murder, violence, blood and injuries, gore.
#. word count! — (so far) 13,500.
#. < full fanfiction, slowburn, no update schedule just whenever I feel like writing. only three chapter have been written so far, slow updates. also being crossposted on ao3 and wattpad as “ hand in unlovable hand”
#. > 0 | 1| 2 | <
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PROLOGUE.
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He swore to himself that this would be a new chance, he wouldn't waste the second chance at life that Eun Sian had graciously gifted him, in not ruining his life, that was all he could do in thanks to his dear person...well. Ex-dear person.
It was only one picture, he wouldn't let it get out of hand again, he probably wouldn't see you ever again, fate was cruel like that, and more than anyone, he knew he couldn't bend it to his will, even if he were to break all of his fingers doing so.
He had been moved far away from Sian, all on his own. A fresh slate. And, now he had no school to preoccupy himself with, he figured that finding a job would be the best thing for him to do in order to try and get his life back on track from the disastrous place he had steered it to, he blamed himself for it all, so, he decided he must be the one to fix it.
His father had given him the money to move in, and apart from that, he had no contact with his family in the slightest, he had no family left that wanted anything to do with him, he had no support system, and with this came more reason to job hunt, with no money he wouldn't be able to feed himself, or pay the bills he had.
Since he was already skilled in photography, that was the easiest first step in his mind, he'd build up a portfolio and become a photographer for events ,such as weddings, and put his prior experience to use.
It was a somewhat warm day in spring, Yul stood outside, camera in hand, snapping pictures of the scenery around him, he was just wandering around, finding whatever he saw pretty he wore a plain outfit, all black, with a hat on so that less of his face was visible, he was aware nobody that knew him could be here, they had actual lives to attend to, but, the thought of it happening but him on edge, he was lucky to be holding his camera or he would've bitten his fingernails half to death.
" At least it's a nice day out.." he mumbled to himself, as he moved to snap a photo of a water fountain that he had found in the middle of one of the nearby parks, surrounded by the greenery it made for an aesthetic picture, just what he was looking for.
CLICK!
The shutter went off and Yul waited to check the photo on the screen...
Fuck, He'd have to retake it, he couldn't have that person standing in the frame.
He looked up, he had to see if whoever you were had moved, and, it was as if the first domino had been pushed over, you were looking away, it appeared an orange butterfly had caught your attention, so you didn't make eye contact, but Yul felt his heart speed up. The rays of sunlight painted your face, the gentle breeze made your hair flow ever so slightly..and you were just wearing the cutest outfit..he wondered what Sian would look like if she wore it.
He slapped himself in the face. He hated the way he thought, he needed to stop thinking about her, it wouldn't get him anywhere. He wanted to change, it was what she wanted. He knew Sian would never wear a skirt like that, what a dumb thought.
By the time he'd finished his self argument, she had already gotten out of the frame, and Yul hesitated before taking another picture, he wouldn't delete the first photo, something compelled him not to.
He bit his lip, harsh, almost like trying to draw blood as he went back to the first photo, infact, your presence there seemed to elevate the scene, maybe it was better with you in it... the more he looked at the photo the more he seemed to agree.
He shook that feeling off and kept walking, he had to learn to do something by himself without the thoughts of her creeping in.
By the time the sun started setting Yul had already gone home, he felt strange, unable to take anymore pictures. His mood had turned completely dejected. It hasn't been all that great after getting out of hospital, he had been miserable despite trying, and today he just started to feel worse.
He was on his computer, which sat on a little desk in the left corner of his room. And was clicking through the photos which he had taken, figuring out which one would be the best to show to professional companies, he had only found two of actual quality for that day, and he clicked right, going to the next one, the one with that girl in it.
He zoomed in, and in and in.
He just sat in his dimly light room, illuminated by a single lamp, with his eyes pressed to the computer screen. Staring at you, Unblinking.
He stared, and stared, and stared.
It didn't take him long to realise he was being creepy, this behaviour wasn't right. He needed to stop.  In the short time he was at therapy, he had been taught a few ways t stop himself when he got all worked up like this, but, it was a shame he couldn't remember a single one of them.
It had been some time since he showed proper interest in anyone, and, you were just some random girl, he wouldn't let it get any worse again, he didn't even know your name or anything, plus he didn't even know anything about you.
Despite the kind look on your face and your general demeanour, you could still be a serpent lying beneath.
Why was he even questioning any of that? He didn't even know you, why was he trying to figure out what kind of person you were? He shook his head, minimising his gallery before closing his computer completely, maybe he was just feeling vulnerable and this is why his strange feelings started to act up again..
Yul had no other explanation outside of it being that, so, he decided to try and sleep it off. He got up from his desk and draped himself over his bed, staring up at his empty walls. With no pictures spread over them, it didn't look right, he could just imagine her face staring back at him...but she wasn't there. She had abandoned him she was horrible she was
Something he no longer needed to worry about, he reminded himself. He had no right to be angry.
He just needed to search and find something to overwhelm the still lingering feelings he has,  or he needs to actually get better, one of the two, he'd settle for.
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kichiyosh1 · 2 years ago
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Deceitful youth
Modern au! scaramouche x f! reader
w//: yandere themes, suggestive, cross-dressing, obsession, photographs of you and your stolen things
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summary: When you finally transfer to an all girls school, he was left with no choice but to take on a false female identity. Just so he wouldn't have to be separated from you, he'd do anything.
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He was obsessed with you from the start.
That day in grade school when you found him playing alone in a corner and you came to offer your hand out for him to take, inviting him to play with the other kids with a cheery smile on your face.
"It must be boring playing there by yourself, come on! i'll introduce you to the others!"
He only stared at your outstretched hand, before looking back up to meet your eyes, his eyebrows drooping before he averted his gaze a few seconds after.
"I don't like playing with the other kids, they think i'm weird..."
"What do they think they're talking about? there's nothing wrong with being weird! I mean, i think i'm weird, but there's nothing wrong with me, see?" you then proceeded to flail your arms out in the air, thinking that'd somehow convince him of your point.
'nope, there's definitely something wrong with you' he wanted to say, but he decided ignoring you would be the best course of action. Unfortunately, you weren't going to let him.
"Let me play with you then! whether if you're called weird or not, I dont mind, because you're definitely much cooler looking than the other kids!"
Cool? you think he was cool? better than the other kids even? he went silent after that, a little too flustered to say anything, but didn't make a move to pull his hand out of your grasp as you led him to who knows where.
if only those times with you could've lasted longer
As time went on you became more distant with the people around you, especially when it came to the opposite sex. He knew what your reasons were, you had told him before you decided to cut all ties.
"My mom... doesn't like the idea of me hanging around with other people, especially boys for some reason. Ah, it's not that I don't like hanging out with you! but, I'm really sorry."
Despite this, that didn't stop his on growing obsession for you. From grade school all the way to high school, he was content knowing you were still in the same school as him. Even if he had to keep a good distance away as to not scare you off. How his fingers nails would dig deep into the wood of the outdoor table when he sees you all buddy, buddy with your friend group, and to no ones surprise, only consisted of girls.
Your mother really did engrave it in your brain, the 'all men are evil' kind of saying, annoyingly enough. The way your face would deflate whenever a guy would walk by a little too close to you. Seeing you fear other guys brought a strange feeling of delight and relief to him. The chances of you getting a boyfriend was beyond negative and non-existent.
Maybe your mother wasn't all that crazy and weird after all. It's true, had it been anyone else, any other guy, they were undeserving of your time and attention. Who knows how they would have treated you, but not him, because only he could treat you right.
You had befriended him first, and in return he will continue to watch over you, as the loving boyfriend you didn't know you had and needed.
So why.
Why did you leave?
"It's been a week since [y/n] transferred to that all girls school."
A week? he's surprised he hasn't spiraled yet into madness.
"Tsk, she thinks she's better than us that she can just up and leave like that?"
'Annoying wench, of course she's better than you, in fact, you're not even close to her league'
"Man, good thing I'm a guy, If I wasn't I'd probably be there too."
'ugh, nobody's forcing you, who the hell cares what—'
he nearly choked
eyes bloodshot when he scanned the room, his bedroom. Why was he here? shouldn't he be in school? Wait, you didn't attend the same school as him anymore, so what even was the point of going?
He layed there with his arm over his forehead, his eyes devoid of any light, the same ones that were present whenever you'd step into a room.
If only he could follow you, he would, but how? If only the world would bend down to his wants, and rules be damned when it came to you. He zoned out the knocking at his door, faintly hearing the jingling of keys when his sister stepped into the room.
"Really? getting all worked up because of some girl that you can't even bother with your attendance anymore?" Raiden Mei, better than being scolded by his mother atleast.
"You're trespassing." said in such a robotic and raspy voice, his glare was received unfazed by mei. "Relax, I've got today off so I decided to be the oh so kind sister that I am and do everyone's laundry. Unless you want to continue living like the hermit that you are under all this pile of trash." He didn't bother replying, and neither did mei want to continue the conversation further, so silence enveloped the room as she rummaged through the pile of clothes that were on the floor.
but something caught her eye, at the foot of the heep was a pretty [f/c] t-shirt that had obviously no business being there. "This-","Don't touch that!" the grip he had on her was inhumane, he hovered above her with a look that clearly said 'don't'. Despite the burning sensation on her wrist, there wasn't a single sign of discomfort shown, instead it was disgust.
"So not only are you a creep," Her eyes wandered to the many pictures of you he had on his wall, she tried to the best of her ability to ignore whenever entering his room, "you're a thief too." She jerked her hand out of his grasp, leaving the t-shirt alone before quickly finishing up collecting his dirty clothes.
"Mind your own damn business","if it would make you feel any better, mom thought you were gonna be a girl, atleast she hoped you would be."
she rested her hand on the doorknob, pausing for a moment, causing scaramouche to raise a brow. "and that's going to help me feel better, how?"
"maybe if she continued believing you were a girl, maybe you would have been, if that came to be then i guess you would have been able to follow her." His breath hitched, the cogs in his head finally starting to turn.
The door to his room was already closed when mei let out a sigh, 'Could have been blessed with a sister, but I've been cursed to have this gremlin for a brother' she'd be lying if she said she wasn't concerned, whether if it was for you or for him, that was none of her buisness.
"poor girl".
_
Back in his room, he was already plotting what he'd do next. The answer was so obvious, so easy for him to achieve, that he's wondering why he hasn't thought of it sooner.
"Being a girl, huh," it wasn't impossible for him to do, he already has feminine features, as he wasn't blessed with a muscular body. He knows how to do make-up, and it would probably be best if he wore a wig to add on to his girly appearance. He'd need to change his wardrobe too, he'll have to do a little bit of research on what girls usually wear depending on what occasion. He's not worried about changing his identity, he's had experience before when making fake accounts and id's. The transfer won't be a problem, he can use his mother's connections to get him in, quite the convenience. You probably already forgot about him, as much as it hurts to say, but it's for the best so you won't be able to recognise him.
He's already getting lightheaded at the idea, giggling to himself imagining all the things he could get away with. Visiting your room wouldn't be weird, sleepovers? he gets to sleep next to you? he's shaking at the idea. Maybe even borrow each other's things, make-up, clothes, food? If you saw him as a girl then you wouldn't have to be afraid of him. It wouldn't be weird if he got all touchy with you, I mean your friends do it all the time, right?
something was starting to rise between his legs, he cringed at the motion. He better keep that in check if he doesn't want his secret to be revealed once he gets close to you.
He's sighing dreamily, his hand going over the framed photo he has of you on his desk. It was the one his mother took when the both of you were still in grade school.
"My [y/n], my darling [y/n]." His gaze softened at the idea of finally being close to you, once again.
"Let's start over."
pt.2?
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chaeeyull · 1 year ago
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Are you sure that your Internet "friends" actually exist, and are not my regular fake accounts with which I learn more about you?
。・:*:・゚★,。・:*:・゚☆
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deathbxnny · 3 months ago
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Arcane characters saying things they'll regret during an argument with you. | Vi, Caitlyn, Jinx, Ekko, Sevika x Gn!Reader
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(Part two)
Because if I can't be happy, then neither can you./j✨️
Content: Alcoholism, spoilers for season 2, heavy angst, toxic behavior, cursing, established romantic relationships, potential mentions of cheating, gaslighting/ manipulation, probably ooc idk, sfw
Reader has no set pronouns.
((Not proofread))
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》VI
You hated the cycle she had trapped herself in. It was never-ending and beyond self-destructive. For a while, you tried to get her out of it by attempting to reason with her, show her the light, tell her that everything is going to be okay and to just stop with the senseless fighting. But then the heavy, out of control drinking began, and she became unrecognizable to you.
She barely spent time with you, and when she did, then it was due to an extreme hangover that you had to nurture her through before the next fight began. You were so sick of it. You couldn't take the state she was in anymore. You wanted your girlfriend back but didn't want to suffer anymore as a result of it. And so, you tried one last time to snap her out of it.
"Hey, uhm... can we talk?" You ask nervously whilst peering at her from the doorway into her room. The roaring of the crowd and indistinguishable words of the announcers buzzed over your heads, reminding you of the timelimit you had to do this right. Vi didn't turn to you and instead focused on smearing the black paint over her eyes, a dark gaze glance cast your way at your meek plea. "Make it quick. I got 10 minutes before I have to be out there again."
You took a deep breath and tried to ignore the coldness in her tone. It was so odd, so not like her. "Vi... I... I need you to stop this. I understand your pain. I really do, I... get it. But this isn't right. You're practically killing yourself here, and I can't take that anymore-" "-This topic again? I told you to fucking drop it already." She hissed with a shake of your head and something about that made you finally snap. "I care about you Vi! That's why I'm doing all of this shit for you. No one else would do as much as I did. Why can't you see that? What the hell happened to you-" Your voice was cut off by her hand slamming into a nearby wall, anger written all over her face that made you flinch away instinctively.
You had never been scared of her before and this just broke your heart further.
"Shut up! You haven't done shit for me, except for pissing me off and whining and crying about every little thing I do! How about you fuck off and leave me the hell alone instead!? The only person who ever did shit for me is Cait and look how that turned out!" Silence. Deafening silence. Except for Vi's heavy breathing. You were rendered speechless. All the years you've spent with her at her side even as children flashed through your mind, before it all stilled and went cold. Your gaze hardened, and you nodded slowly, turning away wordlessly to do as she asked. You understood now. You were always the second choice in the end.
Vi seemed to only notice that you've left once she heard her name being called from the ring above. And her heart sunk at the realisation that this time, you wouldn't be there to watch her win.
And so she didn't.
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》CAITLYN
Zaun was becoming a sensitive and dangerous topic to bring up around her. Even the slightest mention of it made her face harden and earn you a dismissive hand waving all of your protests away. It also didn't help that she was pulling away from you and instead getting closer to a certain red-headed officer of hers. It was frustrating and so exhausting to deal with, on top of all the grief that hung over your heads constantly. It was driving you mad. Nothing you said got through to her.
It wasn't a secret that you disapproved of the war and the alliance with Ambessa. You could look right through her, see with a clear mind that she was up to no good. Whatever she had planned wouldn't bring either nation anything but more plight. This wasn't the right way to go about things. It wasn't humane. The people she hated were no different from you both. But she just couldn't see it the same way, her judgment clouded heavily by her need for revenge on Jinx. A singular person had shifted her perception about a whole group of people... and it was becoming suffocating. You couldn't recognize her anymore.
You were trying to find the right time to finally confront her about it fully, and thankfully, the opportunity came up one evening whilst she was going through paperwork in her office. You were pacing nervously around the room, trying to find the courage to speak your mind, but she beat you to it. "If you have something to say, then say it. I have work to do and can not be disturbed like this." She muttered, eyes focused on the sea of papers before her rather than your stilling form. Very well, she asked for it. "I... want this war to end. This isn't right."
Her hand froze before she hummed and resumed her task. "I thought we had moved on from this topic." She said calmly, not betraying how clearly irritated she was becoming. But you couldn't give up now. You'd go crazy if you did. "Caitlyn. There is no moving on from it if people are going to die as a consequence! How could you ever look away from that? Why can't you see that this is wrong? Why can't you see that Ambessa-" You stepped towards her grand desk with every word, hands coming down to push the paper she was holding away from her face. You just wanted her to finally look at you again after so long. "-Is playing with your mind!" "Enough. Don't you dare say another word."
The Kirammann stood up and towered over you, a strong hand grabbing onto your arm with a sharp shake that surprised you. Had the grief taken over her mind this badly? So much so that she couldn't see how much this was hurting you to lose her? "I demand you see reason and stop sympathizing with those treacherous animals... unless you want me to see you as one of them as well." "You think I'd betray you?" You breathed, and suddenly the realisation that you had lost her for good finally sunk in. You needed to go. Now.
Caitlyn's face sobered up at your question, yet before she could say a thing, her dear officer Nolan stepped in with a report in hand. Seeing the position you two were in, she nervously tilted her head. "Oh, my apologies, am I disturbing you-?" "-Not at all. In fact, I'm the one who's disturbing YOU. My apologies for that." Ripping your arm out of her gloved hand, you pushed past the girl and rushed out of the room.
Your girlfriend watched you disappear down the dark hallway before she straightened up and gave the officer a curt nod to go ahead with her report. But it was hard to listen to a word she was saying when Caitlyn's head was replaying the memory of your teary, heartbroken eyes over and over again.
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》JINX
She didn't care about her life anymore. That was clear as day, and unfortunately, your relationship was suffering because of it. You knew that Silco's death had killed her inside, that his absence left her lost and confused. But you were so desperate to keep her together. So much so that you were practically destroying yourself for her well-being. Eventually, this boiled over when she was beginning to pull away from you. You, who had always been there. You, who she always cringed onto and begged to stay with her. You only had eachother now. It was impossible to think about a life without her now.
The unhinged spark in her eye had faded away and was replaced by an empty shell of what it once was. That scared you more than you'd like to admit. "Jinx... what are you thinking of?" You asked her one night whilst you quietly snuk around the dark lanes of your home. She didn't respond at first, and your eyes were focused on the back of her hooded head, wondering if she even heard you. But you know she had, when she came to a sudden stop. "... I... I think we should part ways, sweetheart. This ain't gonna go over well forever." She said in that hauntingly calm voice you've grown to hate. And you'd be lying if you said that you didn't see this coming.
"But why? We've always been together through everything. This isn't any different-" "-But it is! It's over! Jinx is over!" Facing you, you near flinched at her glowing, violet eyes, heart beating against your chest. She would never hurt you. You knew she wouldn't. And yet... you found yourself ever so slightly stepping away. Maybe that's what set her off in hindsight. "You're gonna leave me like everyone else anyway. Might as well beat ya to it-" "-I would never do that! What has gotten into you? You should know better than to think that-" "-You're scared of me, ain't ya?" You pressed your lips together when you realised that her mental state had gotten much worse than you expected.
She was losing it.
"In fact, I bet you're thinking of me the same way Vi does. You'll be so much happier without me. But... actually... what if you're going to backstab me like her one day?" The look on your face must've been horrific enough to sober her scrambled mind then because even she seemed to be unsure of what she's saying. And yes, you knew she wasn't doing well. You knew she was just saying things without thinking them through. But you were sick of it. So tired of it all. She could practically read your mind.
"W-wait, I'm sorry, I didn't mean that, I-" "-Okay... you're right. We truly would be better off going our separate ways." You were stepping away from her quicker now, and then you were running, your view becoming blurry and unintelligible. "WAIT NO, PLEASE DON'T LEAVE ME, I DIDN'T MEAN IT, I-" Jinx screamed after you, her breathing heavy and uneven, but she didn't go after you. She knew she had lost that right the second she opened her mouth.
You disappeared into the lanes, for the first time ever sprinting away from rather than towards her. And like the Jinx she was, she had screwed up another good thing up for herself. Perhaps deservingly this time.
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》EKKO
Ekko was extremely busy with his duties lately and practically completely neglecting himself for them. It was very concerning to you and everyone, to say the least. Especially now that a war was practically forming at your front door from Piltover. And you were grateful and thankful for all he did for you. You really were. For that reason alone, you wanted him to take things easy at least sometimes to eat and sleep properly when he can. So, on the request of other members, you went to go looking for him one night before it was time for bed. He was sitting up in the tree, clearly planning to keep watch all night, like he usually did.
But you had come with a mission of your own and refused to leave until he came down to bed with you. "Ekko." You hummed as you finally reached him, a friendly smile on your lips. Balancing a nice basket of baked goods you had made yourself, you stepped towards his form that was beautifully illuminated in the moonlight. Seeing him here made you feel content and relieved since you were barely seeing each other to begin with anymore. Which you have been trying to be understanding about.
"I know what you're here for, and the answer is still no." The young man sighed with a shake of his head and frown. You weren't the first one to come by, that's for sure. "Hey... you know this isn't healthy. We're counting on you to stay strong for us, and you can't be that if you're starving yourself." You say with a slight falter to your smile, yet you tried to keep your tone playful and light. He, on the other hand, did not.
"I already told you that it's a no. Now go to bed and let me work." "But I made you these and-" "-I said, no." He hissed out, and that took you aback. He never raised his voice at you, nor did he ever have an attitude with you either. But the stress was getting to him badly, and so was the lack of sleep. "Why can't you just get that? How many times do I have to say it to get it through your thick skull? The least you could do is go and make yourself somewhat useful by patrolling, instead of wasting your time with this."
Oh, how his words cut you deep. Rationally, you knew that everything was just getting too much for him. But it didn't stop you from feeling hurt anyway, as your lip wobbled, and you slammed the basket on a nearby desk before quickly taking your leave wordlessly. Ekko froze at that and reached out to you, your name on the tip of his tongue, but the guilt stopped him from saying a thing.
"Fuck!" He cursed at himself, as he rubbed the bridge of his nose with a disappointed sigh. He definitely was losing it... and you unfortunately had to unfairly take the brunt of it.
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》SEVIKA
"What did I tell you about running off when I tell you to stay put? You could have fucking died out there and then what?" Sevika was angry at you. Not that you could necessarily blame her since you did nearly get killed by an Enforcer earlier. But you had no real choice in this. You swore you didn't mean for this to happen. It was supposed to just be a quick errand run. You wanted to make her something nice for dinner, spoil her a little as a thank you for all the work she was putting into Zaun. Yet you couldn't explain any of this with the way she didn't let you even say a word now from the anger running in her veins. In fact, you had never seen her this enraged before.
"I am sick and tired of you disobeying what I tell you. I can't always be there and save you from everything, you know? I got better things to do and than to babysit you all the time-" "- I'm not asking you to do that either! I'm a grown adult, I can take care of myself!" You yelled back, absolutely angry now yourself at the way she always infantilized you like this. It always the same conversation and argument over and over again. You were so sick of it. You could handle yourself just fine and have proved this before. Yet she was so hellbent on proving you wrong every time, you couldn't take it anymore!
"I'm your partner, Sev. You're supposed to treat me like an equal." "I would, if you weren't so fucking incompetent. If I wasn't there, you would've been dead. Why can't you get that? Should I spell it out for you more? Dumb it down even more?" You hated when she was being like this. It was rare for a reason, and you despised this side of her. The side that was so prideful and egotistical. And you were trying so hard not to stoop to her level. It didn't help that you were a little injured and struggling to stand as is. "I'm not in the mood for this shit, I'm literally bleeding. Can we argue about this later, please? I just wanted to surprise you with something nice for once, and I get that I was wrong, but you don't have to be so mean about it, damn it!"
The tears in your eyes were betraying you, and the embarrassment of that just made you push past her and disappear into your shared bedroom. You'll just deal with the injury yourself. Sevika stared after you in slight surprise, considering it was rare for you to yell back like that and cry at that... but the sight of the flowers and half prepared food on the kitchen counter made the regret finally set in.
Perhaps you were right after all.
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violetrainbow412-blog · 8 months ago
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From hate to love… or something like that
Aegon II Targaryen x fem!reader
word count: 15.7k (sorrrryyyy)
warnings: arranged marriage, hate-to-love, mentions of rape, mentions of incest, mentions of suicidal thoughts, drinking alcohol, mommy issues, daddy issues, mentions of sex without love, unprotected sex, oral sex (f receiving), porn with plot (but something cheap, tbh) and I probably forgot something but I think that makes it clear that this shit is not for minors, so MINORS DNI :)
A/N: I started this since the second season premiere started so if you find any canon-like scenes I completely promise it wasn't intentional. I also want to make it clear that you are responsible for what you read and if you don't like something please just let it go, that would be very kind of you!
And this doesn't make me team green at all, I'm a defender of the rightful queen to the death… it's just that her brother is too sexy to ignore 🫦
Enjoy!
taglist (who I thought might be interested): @barcelonaloverf1life @ilovequeen978
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FIRST ACT: HATE
Finding a wife for Prince Aegon II was probably one of the most difficult tasks Alicent Hightower had to face.
The engagement with his sister Helaena had been broken after a more tempting offer for the princess, which would get them a permanent alliance with the Lannister house that they couldn’t refuse. Viserys himself had agreed to accept and the queen consort had no choice but to give her little daughter in marriage to a blonde lord. The problem was that her son was left without a fiancée.
Aemond didn't worry her, after all he was growing up quite quickly and she knew that he was more inclined to become a warrior than to fulfill his marital responsibilities. But Aegon, however, was a lost cause.
It was no secret that Alicent had always felt disappointed in her eldest son. He was careless, lazy, and a hopeless alcoholic, qualities that couldn’t be celebrated at all. Now that her beloved father had returned, the queen didn’t hesitate to consult him on the matter, hoping that the man had a solution for the problem that afflicted her, and together they analyzed what was the best option to unite the king's first-born son. Especially after, years ago, Rhaenyra and Daemon got married and moved to Dragonstone indefinitely.
“It must be someone we completely trust, someone who cannot dare to hurt us because they know that their blood is linked to ours.”
The Arryns were loyal to the future queen Rhaenyra and some of the houses south of Vale were too. The Westerlands was the richest section of the Seven Kingdoms and was already secured, so it seemed prudent to the king's hand to go for the next widest section: The Reach. The most formidable options within this area were the Hightower and the Tyrell. Obviously taking the first option would be a waste since the members of that house would support Aegon without complaint due to their kinship, so the decision was made with the direct heir of Highgarden.
King Viserys agreed to the idea without putting up many obstacles, since poppy milk clouded his judgment most of the time and also the affairs of his first son had never interested him much.
The union was sealed as soon as the deal was offered to Lyonel Tyrell, who was extremely happy to be able to assure his family a future with said marriage. It was thus that he gave you, his only daughter, to Prince Aegon II Targaryen.
And the second the boy saw you, he absolutely hated you.
He had come to the idea (very unpleasant, by the way) of marrying his younger sister and now that his mother was forcing him to marry a complete stranger, he couldn't be angrier. In a short time he would turn twenty and it seemed pathetic to him that at that point he would have to offer shows like those before the kingdom. Because the wedding wasn’t simple, of course, but thousands and thousands of guests were present at the banquet that Alicent forced the king to prepare, claiming by saying that he had done the same for Princess Rhaenyra's wedding.
“It is a pleasure to finally see each other, your grace. They have told me a lot about you”
You had said those precise words the first time you had met, when his mother organized a walk so that you could 'get to know each other better', although supervised by her own eyes that were behind you, making sure that her son didn’t commit any indecency. But no matter how sweetly you smiled and spoke them, Aegon could sense that you were lying.
There was hatred in your eyes and a clear resentment towards the life from which you were torn, as if it weren’t an honor to have the opportunity to marry the prince of the seven kingdoms. Your hypocritical words represented an insult to the boy and that is why he decided from the first moment that he would hate you deeply.
With your mere existence you would have deprived him of his freedom, his entertainment, his youth. He would be tied to you for future occasions, he would have to take you to all the events, secure your food, your clothes. share the same roof and pretend to be nice to you in the eyes of others. And, besides, he could have thought of a lot of candidates better than you, physically speaking. Your beauty was quite ordinary for his taste, as if he were looking at any painting; cheap and repetitive.
“I regret to admit that I am not so fortunate, Lady Tyrell. But I am happy for the union of our houses” he lied, in the same way that you had done.
And it was obvious that this didn’t go unnoticed by you, that you had the same critical eye as your recent fiancé but that you sought to maintain composure in the presence of your future mother-in-law.
On the wedding day Aegon had a good time only because he was able to drown himself in monumental quantities of liquor and because he was able to eat as much as he wanted of the exquisite banquet. He didn't even pay a bit of attention to how you looked in the wedding dress that the royal seamstresses had been in charge of making in record time, because when the time came he flattered you superficially and then ignored the matter. The ceremony kiss was the first you shared, and it was so fleeting and awkward that the prince felt disappointed. On the wedding night he was so drunk that he didn't even look at you.
You knew that the unfortunate day would come when you would have to carnally please the young man and the simple thought of being defiled in this way caused you terror and nausea in equal parts.
It was a stranger whom you had married, of whom the only thing you knew was his noble title and name.
In the days following your marriage, unfortunately or fortunately, Aegon didn’t even speak to you. You didn't have to share a room, so it was easier for him to completely ignore you while he went about his ways.
You had to admit that the only good thing about having taken this trip was the beautiful landscapes that King's Landing offered you. Your room had a direct view of Blackwater Bay and you spent several days looking out the window at the beautiful sea. Sometimes you could watch Prince Aemond ride his dragon, and honestly, the size of the beast scared you a little. You hadn't had the chance to observe Aegon in Sunfyre yet but if he was as impressive as Vhagar, then he would be quite a sight.
A week passed, then another and another where you were nothing more than a guest in the palace. You didn't talk to anyone, you ate dinner alone, you barely saw the outside of the castle. Sometimes you went to the Sept, pretending to pray, but really just killing the endless boring hours of the day. You were somewhat lucky if you found Helaena, the most sensible and calm within the royal family, because you had pleasant conversations with her. When you met the queen it was a little more difficult, because she asked you endless questions in which you had to fake the answers. How could you be fulfilling your parenting responsibilities if the capricious prince wouldn't deign to lay a finger on you?
After a month, Alicent seemed to take matters into her own hands and forced her eldest son to take you to sleep in the same room as him. However, Aegon seemed to want to blame you for something you hadn't chosen. He never spoke to you and every time you went to bed, he would stand with his back to you as far away as possible. And as if that weren’t enough, he had explicitly ordered his guards not to allow you to leave the room unless it was in his company. It was his way of punishing you, of getting even for the complaints of his mother and grandfather regarding his lack of interest in marriage.
“My mother wants us to attend a dinner tonight” you were so unaccustomed to hearing his voice addressing you that it took you a second to process what he was telling you “I will talk to the maids to bring you a suitable dress.”
You didn't know what to say. You didn't want to go to that dinner, nor did you want to be with him, or wear one of those tight, annoying dresses. Aegon, noticing your silence, deigned to look at you and in your eyes he could see the aversion you felt for him. It was something difficult to mask and he had seen it on so many faces that it was nothing new.
“As you wish, prince.”
A bitter laugh came from your husband's throat.
“Don't be a hypocrite, for God's sake. I know you hate me as much as I hate you. Save appearances for guests, not in the chambers."
You wouldn’t have had the courage to admit out loud what his majesty had said, but you didn’t dare to contradict him either. You had to play the role of a self-sacrificing and suitable wife for the man if you wanted to keep your honor, but above all your head.
You tried, with all your might, to see some quality in Aegon that you liked so that you could treat him in a better way, which always resulted in something useless. Perhaps if he had been nicer to you, you could have known how to forgive his faults, but even that wasn’t granted to you.
The dinner was mostly family-oriented, with the guest of honor being from House Baratheon whose purpose was to discuss some political matters with the king and queen. Due to his health, Viserys didn’t usually leave his room more than necessary, however, that night the occasion warranted it.
“Lady Tyrell, how is your stay in King's Landing?”
The king had a reputation for being gentle with his guests and was the first person to ask you a personal question, so the smile you showed him was genuine.
“Very pleasant, your grace. The servants treat me as well as possible and I must admit that the views from my room are beautiful. Your dragon is impressive, Prince Aemond, by the way.”
The boy, who wasn't all that expressive, just looked at you for a moment and tilted his head down slightly.
“I'm glad you like it, princess.”
"And my son? How is our Aegon treating you?”
That question was more complicated to answer, since it required expressing a lie. Everyone present focused their attention on you, except your husband who had been staring into nothingness for a long time.
“Very well, my king. He’s a good husband and I am happy to have been able to unite our houses.”
The aforementioned snorted, incredulous at what you were saying at the table, and took a long drink from his glass of wine.
“And I hope very soon you can give us strong and beautiful heirs.”
Although that was intended as a compliment, you felt the weight of that responsibility pressing down on you again.
“I wish the same. It will be an honor to serve the crown and bear the progeny of a house as formidable as yours."
The queen was pleased with your answer and for a moment felt sorry for you. She knew her son well, so deep down she knew that it wasn’t a gift from the gods to be married to him. The rest of the table looked at you curiously, wondering if you were serious, trying to be ironic, or just trying to play the good girl role.
Aegon, as expected, became intoxicated during dinner and when Queen Alicent announced that she was going to retire to sleep you thought it prudent to do the same. Your husband, however, had other wishes.
“Stay here,” he asked, his voice serious.
When he was drunk he looked you up and down, probably evaluating how worth it would be to decide to strip you naked and fuck you once and for all. Your body in the dress you were wearing looked better with a few drinks on him.
“I think it would be best to retire, my husband. This way you can stay with the men to chat and… drink”
“But I want you to stay here to keep me company,” he insisted, holding your wrist tightly “Or don't you want to please your prince?”
It wasn’t a loving request, but one for control. He wanted to have you there only to demonstrate his power over you, without paying attention to you or talking; only as an ornament.
“Aegon, enough,” Alicent interrupted, observing the scene that had begun to unfold. “Daughter, let's go to sleep. “I will accompany you”
“Fine, do whatever you want,” he spat contemptuously, abruptly releasing the wrist that was holding you. There was hatred in his eyes, but also pride.
The queen said goodbye to everyone present and then offered you her hand to take you away from there. You spent most of the way in silence, walking through the long, wide corridors of the fortress followed only by the faithful footsteps of Ser Criston Cole.
“You must be patient with him” he began to say “He is a particular man and sometimes… difficult, but I know that with your docile character you will be able to deal with his temperament.”
What did she know about your character? She didn't know you at all.
“So it shall be, Queen Alicent.”
“I understand what you are going through, dear. We both come from the same lands to endure the difficult task of accompanying a monarch. But it is our duty to carry it out with all the honor and temper worthy of our homes. Of course, I can trust that as a woman you will be able to help him fulfill another of the most important marital commitments, such as having children, to maintain the lineage and blood. For a virgin like you, Aegon may be rough, but... patience and resilience are among the best virtues. A woman in royalty must endure these things to give the best to the people.”
You had never wanted to be a princess. And just when you thought the queen was showing you compassion, you realized that she was only looking out for her interests and those of her family.
"Thanks for the advice. I'll keep it in mind"
She smiled and immediately left a kiss on your forehead, which could have been taken as a maternal kiss but which you didn't like at all. The longer you can postpone suffering, the better. If Aegon didn't even want to look at you, it was perfect.
That night, as soon as you touched the mattress and the silk sheets that decorated it, you began to cry until you fell asleep.
SECOND ACT: CONTROL
Time passed again and although the punishment of not leaving your room was not revoked, you found multiple activities with which to entertain yourself in the prince's absence. You filled your mornings and afternoons with reading, writing, knitting and embroidering. The nights were even more boring because most of the time your husband wasn't there either.
Rumors that you hadn’t yet consummated the marriage had spread through the halls of the palace and soon the smallfolk would murmur too. After all, the people couldn’t entertain themselves with anything more than the gossip and the plays that were going on in the poor neighborhoods, making fun of royal affairs.
You no longer even had the energy to deny those accusations and Aegon had given you the perfect opportunity by throwing you out of his room and refusing to leave the four walls of yours: if you didn't leave there, there was no way anyone would question you. And since you didn't have family inside the Keep, you didn't have any visitors either.
One night, however, your husband surprised you by entering your room. It had been days since you two had seen each other and his staggering around the room warned you that he was drunk again. You often wondered how he resisted drinking so much and the long-term effects it would have on his health, but right now your mind could only focus on the fear of what he might want in that state.
“Good night, dear,” he drawled, sounding as sarcastic as possible.
You were in your nightgown and you were carrying in your hand an old book that you had been reading and that you threw on the nightstand as soon as you saw him approaching you. You didn't have time to say or do anything else when he had already approached you in giant steps to grab you by the back of your neck and start kissing you. He was abrupt, careless, with his mouth smelling of wine and tasting even worse. You wanted to cry from helplessness.
“It's what everyone wants, isn't it?” he murmured, separating himself from you, but still holding you by the hair at the back of your neck. “A marriage arranged in a couple of days to form alliances. And that's it, my life was ruined thanks to my father wanting your stupid castle to expand his domain."
The truth is that couldn't be further from the truth. Viserys’s ambition had never been that, as he had been so little involved in the process that he simply didn’t care who his children were or were not married to. Except for Rhaenyra, of course.
Aegon continued:
"I didn’t want this. I didn't want to marry you, or anyone..."
“And you think I do?” you confronted him.
You were tired of the insult, the humiliation and him ignoring you as if you were worthless; even if that was what a husband did. And the most likely thing was that your words would be forgotten due to alcohol or that they would put an end to the wait for your suffering to begin and Aegon decided to take you once and for all.
“You have nothing to lose, prince,” you continued. “You get drunk as much as you want, you run away from your responsibilities and walk everywhere when I have to stay locked up here all day just because you want me to. I have to endure the suspicious looks of everyone because I still don't have an heir in the womb while you go and fuck your whores."
“I'm the prince and I fuck whoever I want, did you hear me?” he hissed. The grip on your hair had already begun to become painful and a few tears slipped down your cheeks “And I stop fucking whoever I want too. I'm not going to please anyone by getting you pregnant. There they will see if they come and force me to put my cock in you”
“Do you doubt that, your grace?” you exclaimed bitterly “Doubts that will force us to conceive?”
“So that's what you want? Do you want me to do it?”
“I want to go home. That is what I want. But my father used me as a bargaining chip and that's why I can't do anything."
“I'm sorry it was like that. If I had chosen my wife, I would surely have chosen someone prettier and more educated than you, but I can't do much either."
Once again, the man pushed you until your lips joined his and the same discomfort settled in you. He didn't kiss you with love, but with fury and violence to the point that you had to push him away when he bit you so hard that a trickle of blood began to come out of your lower lip. Aegon was also stained by it and with an acidic smile he ran the tip of his tongue all over his mouth to remove any traces.
Looking at you he didn't look happy, but he didn't look angry either. He just seemed fed up.
Everyone knew, or suspected, that the prince was very capable of taking sexual advantage of any woman. He had done it before with maids and prostitutes and had slept peacefully throughout that time. However, there was something about you that encouraged him not to. He didn't even think it was something about you specifically but about the situation, because he wanted to do the opposite of what he was ordered: if everyone ordered him to take you to have an heir, it automatically became an unpleasant act and at the same time that he refused.
He was hurt, not because of you but because of years and years of abuse and neglect. He didn't really know you at all, he only knew what you represented.
You were just the unlucky one who had married him.
"I hate you. I hate that you are my wife and you are not worthy of me even touching you” he snapped with disdain. You were still fighting to keep the tears inside your eyes and his vision had also blurred slightly “I wish I had never met you.”
“The feeling is mutual, your grace,” you expressed, your voice breaking. If it was an offense to the crown, you wouldn't even care anymore and if he killed you right there you wouldn't regret it too much either.
Aegon looked at you one last time before staggering back out the door without another word, closing it behind him with a loud gesture and leaving you alone in the room. The reality that you had escaped, once again, from being raped by the man fell on you like a bucket of cold water and your knees weakened until you fell to the floor.
You were hurt, tired, and defeated by the stress of the situation and the fear that had washed over you the entire time. Luckily he was gone, otherwise you didn't know if you would have endured what he had to do to you. It was better to have him busy in a brothel than to have to endure him in your bed.
You wished you could talk to someone and cry on a loved one’s shoulder, only to realize a second later that that was impossible. Aegon was your new family, now you belonged to the Targaryens and you would have to do as they wished.
Anger completely overwhelmed you to the point where you stood up from your seat and began throwing pieces of glassware all over the room, in a violent outburst at what had just happened and the way you felt. None of the guards outside your door dared to come in to check on you and soon enough you fell back to the ground, exhausted from the effort.
As you cried, perhaps for the umpteenth time since you had been married, you thought about how you would never be able to love Prince Aegon. Not even if you tried.
THIRD ACT: PAIN
After months, the inevitable arrived. The truth was that the first time you felt sorrow and anger, but the following times it became more tolerable. Not because it was better, but because you began to get used to it. Aegon didn't change his attitude towards you one bit. You indeed spent more time together, although that didn’t mean that you got along better or that you had begun to have more sympathy for each other.
The only advantage was that you had started to be friends with some people in the palace. Your sister-in-law, to begin with, as well as some of the maids who were in charge of looking after you, as they turned out to be your only company during those days. Those distractions were more than enough for you, considering the situation you were in, and they kept you sane as time went by.
Almost like a punishment from heaven, it seemed that you weren’t pregnant yet, since your biological processes seemed to continue working to the letter. That meant that, unfortunately, you would have to keep trying; when Aegon was lost enough to forget who you were and you had to stand still as a statue to let him loom over you.
You often liked to imagine what your life would have been like if you had stayed in Highgarden. Nobody knew it yet, but there you had found your first love and although it never went beyond a few kisses, you treasured the memory with particular affection. You had always wanted to marry a sweet man who loved and respected you, who would give you your place as a wife and adore you day and night; someone with whom you could feel protected, cared for, but above all happy. You thought, naively, that that boy you had met and who was nothing more than a commoner could have given you that life, but all those possibilities were nothing more than fantasies in which you tried to lock yourself in to feel less miserable with your unpleasant reality.
One night Helaena had invited you to a modest dinner in her company that you couldn't refuse, since none of your husbands were present and some time with friends could clear your mind. You didn't even know where the prince was, although it was expected that he was spending some time in the town with his friends.
“Sometimes I feel sad about our situation,” said the blonde. You were in the privacy of her chambers, not even with the maids present, so confessions like that were allowed “But I am happy that you are my friend, something that wouldn’t have been possible otherwise.”
“I'm glad to talk to you too,” you smiled sincerely. “You're the best thing I've found around here.”
“My brothers aren't that bad, they're just… well, we've had a hard life. And that's why they behave like that."
“I think there is no justification for being a…” idiot, you wanted to say, but you had to remember that you were in the presence of the princess, “a person who is rude to others. But I guess that happens with royalty, right? They do what they want without consequences”
"I guess so. Kings, princes, the heirs, lords, dukes…”
“Okay, I get it,” you laughed bitterly “It's probably a masculine quality.”
You never thought your sister-in-law would have that kind of humor and to be honest, most of the time she was a comic relief for the situations you two were going through. Sometimes her prophecies scared you, especially the way she phrased them, but you wanted to think that her premonitions would never affect you directly.
When you finally got tired of chatting and the food was finished, you decided to return to your room, so you could have a peaceful night's rest. It was raining outside and thunder echoed in the distance, making the atmosphere slightly gloomy, but at the same time cooling every corner of King's landing.
The novelty of your position was no longer important enough to require you to be escorted by guards twenty-four hours a day, so you were able to slowly walk through all the corridors that led to your sanctuary. It was modest but cute, although not on the level of Aegon’s.
A man was guarding the door and you bowed your head to him to let you pass, which he did without any opposition. Once inside you got rid of your shoes and unbuttoned your corset, not caring that the room was almost in darkness; only the moonlight illuminated from the window. You took a few steps forward and squealed when you discovered that there was another person in the room, sitting at the small table with a drink in his hand. You would have started screaming for help if you hadn't noticed that said intruder had silver hair falling like a curtain over his face.
"Your grace?" you asked cautiously.
It isn’t usual for Aegon to drink in your room, as he preferred other places with more interesting company, and when you didn’t receive an answer you approached slowly. You thought that at best he had simply fallen asleep and at worst he would be dead.
At first his long, wavy hair covered your view of his face, but when he noticed your presence he raised his head and then you could see him. His features became clearer as lightning illuminated him from the outside and for a second you were horrified.
His cheek was red and a trickle of blood was dripping from his nose, however, what surprised you the most was seeing his eyes completely swollen.
“For the seven, I… I'll go call a maester”
“Don't even think about it,” he exclaimed hoarsely, seeing that you were already rushing towards the door.
Your husband didn't sound like his usual angry tone, but rather he seemed... hurt.
You thought for a second about what the appropriate reaction to the situation was. You couldn't leave the room because, in addition to the guards murmuring, it would be impolite to leave him in that state; also, where would you go? If you ignored him, he would probably take it as an insult and he had already made it clear that he didn't want to see someone who could take care of those injuries.
You hated him, it was true, but you weren't an insensitive monster either.
"Who did this to you?"
Aegon was surprised by how soft, even kind, your question sounded and the intoxication gave him some courage to answer.
“My mother and my grandfather. Mostly my mother, my grandfather rather dedicated his efforts to reminding me how useless I am”
You didn't know what to say. You never believed that the queen would be capable of hitting one of her sons like that. You didn't believe it from any mother, actually.
With some trepidation you took one of the chairs and placed it in front of him, expecting him to immediately push you away or ask you to get out of his sight. However, the prince didn't seem to have enough energy to do any of those things.
He had a lost look on his face and tears began to run down his face.
“Nothing… nothing I do pleases her. Neither to her, nor to my grandfather. All the time they are pressuring me, demanding me, yelling at me. Apparently Otto still hopes that my father will name me king, but I've never wanted that. They blame me for drinking all the time and how do they expect them not to? My father cares so little about me and my mother hates me. All his life he has hated me. She does it, my brothers… and so do you. My own wife hates me. Everyone… everyone who knows me does it”
You were silent for a moment.
There were mixed feelings inside you, because you couldn't forget the mistreatment that the man had given you during those months, nor the way he used you for his pleasure. He was right when he said you hated him. However, there was a compassionate part of you, deep down, that felt sorry for the man's state.
“And sometimes I just want to be dead. I just wish all the shit would go away and drowning in alcohol and dying would take away Alicent's problem and allow her to focus her attention on something better”
His gaze lifted and he looked at you with crystallized eyes.
“Maybe you should poison me one day. So your suffering would also end”
“Your highness, I cannot do that”
“But would you like it? Do you hate me enough to wish me dead?”
“Of course not,” you said quickly.
"Liar. You lie like everyone else. You want me dead”
You knew that saying something negative at that moment, in the state he was in, could result in him making some incoherence that you would be blamed for the next morning. So it was best to act cautiously.
“I don't think anyone wants that”
“My mother does. My father, Rhaenyra does it, and so does her stupid new husband…”
“Your grace…” you interrupted him harshly. Listening to him sink into his self-indulgence was too much to bear “You better go to sleep, don't you think? Now you're not thinking clearly, you'll feel better in the morning."
But Aegon seemed to be lost in his own thoughts, oblivious to anything you had to say to him.
“I guess I just wish someone wouldn't completely detest my existence, you know?”
Aegon had done terrible things to you, of course, but seeing him at that moment made you wonder if all of this was the product of poor parenting and psychological abuse that had been perpetuated for twenty long years. You couldn't say your father loved you, not after what he had done, but at least he hadn't constantly hurt you as the man in front of you had. You knew better than anyone that hate had to be healed with empathy and for a brief moment you felt soft for him.
Once Aegon was a small child, without sins, without accumulated hatred, without evil... and apparently that frightened child hadn’t been completely buried, because it was him who cried inconsolably and saw death as a viable alternative to end that suffering. However, there is no redemption without guilt, right? You don't get to heaven without first repenting.
You stayed silent for a long time, listening to him sob, and when you gathered the courage you spoke:
“Prince, can I be honest with you?”
You had spoken in a low and benevolent voice, while you slid from your chair until you were kneeling in front of him. The boy didn't even want to take advantage of that position for a sexual act, he was simply too tired and drained to think. You placed your hands on his knees and seeing that he nodded, you continued:
“You say you wish someone wouldn't hate you, but have you ever made an effort to do so? Or have you even wondered why people feel that way about you?”
“It's something natural for them”
“I didn't feel it,” you said, honestly. You hated the idea of getting married out of obligation, but if he had been different from the beginning maybe your feelings for him would be too “And you made me feel it. With your contempt, your humiliations, your punishments…”
“If everyone thinks you're a monster, what's the point of contradicting them?”
“And then you prefer to agree with them?”
You were probably taking too many liberties with the prince, but you would never have a chance to talk to him like that again. He was vulnerable and therefore less defensive than normal.
“Every person is responsible for their actions,” you continued. “You can't change how the queen or king feels about you, but you can choose to offer something better to others. If it’s your desire that people not hate you, that won’t happen overnight just because you tell it to. It takes time, effort and above all it requires kindness. If you live regretting the concept that people have of you, without doing anything to change it, then you will live a lifetime of dissatisfaction. If you seriously want someone to feel happy about your existence then pursue that goal, don’t expect it to be granted to you as a divine work.”
A deeper cry began to well up from the man and you almost thought he would lean down for your hug. Still, he didn't.
“I don't know how to be someone else. I have always been this”
“Not always, that's for sure. Water that stagnates rots and becomes a swamp. The one that runs, on the other hand, becomes a river and flows into the ocean.”
You raised the handkerchief you always carried and, in an act of kindness that was also intended to be an offering of peace, you gently wiped the tears and dried blood from his face. Aegon squirmed as he had never experienced that kind of care.
“You just have to ask yourself: what do you choose to be?”
For an endless moment he watched you. His judgment was clouded by drunkenness, but he wondered if he wasn't hallucinating and you were simply the voice of his conscience telling him something he had never wanted to accept.
It was easier to blame others for his mistakes, to justify himself by saying that everything about him was his mother's fault and that if he behaved the way he did it was only a defense mechanism. Aegon had never thought about how his treatment of women was a direct consequence of Alicent's upbringing: if his own mother had hurt him, why wouldn't other women do the same to him? And since he was convinced that they were all going to do it, he preferred to turn them into objects that he could use for his benefit.
He was so drunk and so exhausted from all the crying he had shed that he simply pushed your hand away from his face and stood up from the chair, without saying a word. You, now standing, saw him begin to undress and the first thing you thought was that he would seek to heal his sorrows by having sex with you. However, he only got rid of the essentials and then lay on his stomach on the bed. Without any choice, you took off your clothes for the day, put on a nightgown and also lay down on the mattress to sleep.
You were sure that the next day Aegon wouldn’t remember anything and you weighed the possibility of the whole story repeating itself, in an endless and painful loop for the two of you. And if you were right, it would be a shame if you had to live like this for the rest of your days.
FOURTH ACT: REDEMPTION
“Do you know where Meryna is?” you asked one of the maids who had come in to change your bedding.
“No, your grace”
“I'm starting to get hungry and she still hasn't brought my breakfast,” you exclaimed sadly.
You had woken up a while ago and had gotten dressed to go for a walk after eating, to see if this would cheer you up a little. It had been a few days since Aegon had opened up in the privacy of your room and after that you had barely seen him, much less spoken to him. You believed that everything was due to a matter of pride or even shame for what you had witnessed and you simply didn’t give it importance, because you knew that eventually he would approach you again. You just had to wait for him to want to do it.
Almost as if by summons, the black-haired girl appeared through the door, looking agitated and embarrassed by the delay. Furthermore, she came empty-handed.
"Princess…"
“Didn't you bring breakfast?” you asked, still sounding cordial but slightly surprised.
“I'm very sorry, it's just that Prince Aegon asked me to bring the food to the royal dining room. He is waiting for you there, he told me to come and get you.”
He hadn’t mentioned requiring your presence for any breakfast and, according to you, there were no guests in the palace to accompany. The two women noticed your dismay and Meryna stood waiting for a response.
“Did he tell you why?”
“No, your grace”
"Good. Then tell him I'll be there in a moment."
You only took a few minutes to change your dress, one more suitable for being in the presence of the prince and in case there was a guest you didn't know about. There were no guards at your door so you were able to walk to the dining room by yourself and were surprised to see that only your husband was at the table. He had an expression that you interpreted as a mix of impatience and nerves.
“Oh, you finally arrived. Sit down. You, bring the princess something to drink,” he ordered a maid. He used to call you that in the presence of guests, but it was rare for him to have that courtesy when alone.
“Are we waiting for someone?”
"No. I just thought you might want to have breakfast together.”
You were already sitting next to him, and for a second you watched him with a frown. Had he hit his head somewhere or why was he acting so strange?
“Do you prefer juice or wine, your highness?
"Juice"
“And bring her some strawberries,” Aegon exclaimed.
There was something about the situation that scared you, because you imagined that he wouldn't be treating you so kindly without wanting something in return. But you were already his wife and he did whatever he wanted with you, what more could he want from you?
You looked him up and down, as if searching for some sign, but he looked completely normal. He was wearing one of those full black robes he was used to, with a golden chain with emeralds decorating the hem of his neck and a belt accentuating his figure. The dark circles in his eyes were pronounced, as always, but the look was not that of someone angry; you would even say that he looked somewhat passive, even sleepy.
While you were thinking about all that, you remembered the last conversation you had had with him. You feared that madness had finally exploded in your husband and the food you were about to eat was poisoned, as he had suggested at the time. Perhaps out of courtesy he was waiting for you to take the first bite and, trying to control the trembling in your hands, you took a portion of the cold cuts on your plate to put it in your mouth. Luckily the food didn't taste different and after seeing that the man ate it with the utmost calmness, you assumed that it didn't contain any poison either.
There was freshly baked bread, jam, some cheeses, the aforementioned cold cuts, a variety of fruits, scrambled eggs with fresh herbs and chives, as well as some stuffed buns for dessert. It was a mini banquet and as you ate it you couldn't help but wonder why this show of kindness was due.
Aegon didn't seem to have any intention of talking and you didn't try to force him, not wanting to either. The atmosphere was one of peace and tranquility, one you had not experienced since your wedding day until now, and it was a very different but strangely pleasant feeling.
It was just a couple sharing breakfast time, but for two people who come from such a broken home it felt like a totally new experience.
You continued in silence until most of the things served were finished, leaving only what wasn’t to your palate's liking or that your body was simply no longer able to ingest.
“Do you need anything else, your majesty?”
“Clear this table, we won't eat anymore,” he said to the maid, nonchalantly pointing to the leftovers you had left. Then he looked at you “Satisfied?”
"I am. Everything was delicious”
“I want us to do the same tomorrow. I will send a maid for you, so get ready soon,” he said decisively.
Then he got up from his chair, stretched a little, and left the room without saying anything else to you.
You didn't see your husband the rest of the day, but the next morning he kept his promise without fail. Although the breakfast menu was different the routine was the same and again it made you wonder what the reason for it was.
The next day he also requested your presence for breakfast and you concluded that he intended to make it a habit. For the rest of the morning you were supposed to dedicate yourself to your activities, but after a week of following that routine Aegon informed you that he had other plans for you.
“I want you to come with me for a walk.”
"To the exterior?"
"Yeah. I have training with Ser Criston but I don't wish to attend, so you will be my excuse. I'll tell him that the princess wanted to go for a walk and that I couldn't let her go alone."
He was telling you that lie almost like a childish prank and you would swear he was about to smile.
“Huh, okay. If you want it, we will”
You were still confused by his actions, because in all the time you had been there it was the first time he treated you decently. You didn't know if he was still drinking in large quantities, but at least when he went to sleep he no longer reeked of liquor in the same way. And all that week he hadn't forced you to have sex with him.
What had motivated the prince to change his way of behaving towards you?
"Do you want to go to the beach? I will order a couple of horses to be saddled for us” he exclaimed when you had already left the dining room.
You couldn't refuse to go to the bay, because in your entire life you had never seen the ocean and your curiosity was greater than any other feeling. Besides, you loved horses, and being with them might even make you feel better.
Aegon did as he told you and soon enough you were in the stable. He had ordered a beautiful white mare for you, with a silver mane the color of your husband's hair and a formidable build.
You approached to pet the animal, carefully, and tensed completely when you felt another body behind yours. Until that moment you hadn't realized how warm your husband was.
“She's pretty, right?”
His voice sounded at your ear level, as he had also reached out to touch Frostfire’s hair.
"She is"
“I guess you know how to ride,” he muttered under his breath and you let out an offended sigh.
“Of course I do. Highgarden is the heart of the chivalry of the seven kingdoms”
After saying that you turned your head just a little and met his gaze, indigo eyes with hints of lilac looking at you carefully. You could feel his breath against yours and at that closeness your cheeks had already turned red involuntarily.
He separated from you and then went to choose his horse, a black thoroughbred with beautiful braids, to get on it and ask the guards to open the door for you. You almost managed to sneak away, but Ser Criston stopped the two of you just before you could do so, claiming that he had a scheduled practice with the prince.
“I'm taking my wife to Blackwater, she hasn't had a chance to visit since her arrival.”
“But your grace, your father…”
“We will continue with training later, Ser Criston,” he said firmly.
“Will you go to Blackwater without an escort?”
“I will”
"That's impossible"
“Don't worry, I don't want to be accompanied. Just rest for now.”
“But you are the prince.”
"Exactly. I am the prince and I want my orders to be respected."
The boy was a smug son of a bitch when he put his mind to it, just like now. The man had no choice but to obey the words and then the two of you were able to leave. You could get there on foot, but Aegon had felt like riding and had wanted an alternative to quickly escape if something went wrong.
You walked along a path that still belonged to the Red Keep grounds, so there was no great danger of being attacked along the way, and you soon reached the bay. It was even more beautiful up close and as soon as you got off the mare you forgot any courtesy towards your husband, as you rushed towards the shore to watch the waves crash. Your pumps and dress were soaked when the water reached your calves, but it didn't bother you too much because you were happy for the reason.
“Have you never been to the ocean?”
“I'm afraid not, your grace. There was never any business that required me to be on the coast of The Reach and I have always lived surrounded by hills and forests. I had seen some rivers, but…”
Before you could continue your story you staggered because of a wave and to avoid falling you tried to hold on to whatever was within reach, which turned out to be the man next to you. He supported you from the elbows with his strong arms.
“Oh, I'm so sorry.”
“It’s okay,” he laughed. For the first time in your presence, he had laughed “But we should get away from the shore. I wouldn't want to take you back to the castle all soaked”
You heeded the boy's advice and, still leaning on him, walked towards the sand. The sky was slightly cloudy, so the weather was perfect for walking around without any discomfort.
“I've never visited Highgarden, is it as impressive as rumored?” he asked, as he began to walk in the opposite direction of the Red Keep.
Although you never believed that the prince would be interested in such things, you began to talk to him about your hometown with particular emotion. You told him about his surroundings, about the castle and you also told in greater detail the gardens that once belonged to you and were full of golden roses, as was the emblem of your house.
You were surprised by how attentive the boy was to everything you had to say to him and for the first time since your arrival, you didn't feel like a stranger in your own skin. Talking about your home was like remembering a part of yourself, as if you were showing him your insides through stories of the beautiful hills where you had ridden so many times.
“Everything sounds wonderful,” he concluded. The sea breeze had already ruffled both of your hair and he took advantage of this to brush a strand out of your face “Someday I should go visit it”
“Yes, maybe you would like that” you exclaimed smiling. You had come too far and it was time to walk back, towards where you had left Frostfire and Moonshadow tied up “Your grace, may I ask you a question?”
"Yeah"
You opened your mouth to ask him why he was doing all that and why he had suddenly started showing so much interest in you. You wanted to know the reason for his unexpected kindness and his abstinence from activities that weren’t very pleasant for you. But before you could speak, you took a moment to observe him. His skin looked paler in the light outside and his silver hair waved in the wind, however, what caught your attention the most was the serene expression on his face.
Although you couldn't say that you knew Aegon, the time you had lived together had shown you that his personality was extremely challenging. If you pointed out that he was being nicer to you and questioned him about it, he would most likely revert to his old behavior towards you simply on a whim. So no, you couldn't ask him about anything or you'd ruin the minuscule part of a good relationship you had managed to build.
“I was thinking... Do you think we can one day bring golden roses to the royal gardens? Green and gold are part of your emblem too and that would beautify the place. I could take care of them, if you want.”
“That's a good idea,” he exclaimed happily. You had already turned around to return and you calculated that it must be after noon “I will order them to be brought in as soon as possible, in the hope that the hot weather at King's landing will not ruin them”
“I hope not,” you said, although a little less enthusiastic than before.
You had been lost in thought after the appearance of that question that you did not verbalize and suddenly Aegon feared that he had made some mistake. You walked a few meters in silence, until this state was unbearable for his majesty and he stopped you by holding your shoulders. You were about to ask what had happened when he pulled you against his lips, stealing your breath. It was still a rough kiss, but this time less desperate than before. His hands went down to your waist and held you to his body until there wasn’t even a centimeter of distance left, with your belly touching the heat of his stomach.
“Still no signs that you are pregnant?”
You thought that, perhaps, your answer was in that question and that the only thing the man wanted was to convince you to hurry up the matter of producing an heir.
“I'm sorry to say no. It's very unfortunate."
“We'll have to keep trying,” he said, shrugging his shoulders as if he wanted to downplay the matter “Mother insists on it.”
“Has your mother always been like this to you?”
"What are you talking about?"
“It's just… she seems to have everything under control all the time.”
You couldn't be further from the truth and rather than describing it that way Aegon would have said that she was controlling. She wanted to have things under control, but she couldn't and as an example was the eldest prince himself, whom she had never been able to persuade to behave the way he did.
“Well, she is the queen. I guess that's how she must be” he exclaimed without much encouragement. He was still holding you by the waist and was surprised by how intimate that position was. “But we better get back, they must be wondering where we are”
“Maybe they even think I ran away, taking advantage of the fact that you weren't there to watch me,” you joked.
"Would you do it?"
"Do what?"
“Run away”
You looked at the man, incredulous, because it was stupid to think that if you were planning to run away you would just tell him like that. That was the characteristic of it, that it was surprising and hidden.
“Why would I do, your grace?”
“Maybe because I'm a bad husband,” he said quietly. You weren't understanding the game Aegon was playing and it was driving you crazy.
“I wouldn't dare do it. I have nowhere to go and I know I couldn't even get through the doors without your majesty noticing,” you replied.
The prince didn’t want pragmatic reasons like that, but rather his question was more aimed at whether it was your will to abandon him.
Against all odds a couple of raindrops began to fall and very soon a storm had already brewed over your head. It was useless to run, but you did it anyway and Aegon held your hand to prevent either of you from falling due to a trip. Somewhere along the way you lost one of your pumps and at this you began to laugh and he, infected by your joy, did the same. It amused you greatly to think of the face the queen would make when she saw you enter the castle, with her eldest son soaked from head to toe and your clothing incomplete. But you also laughed from the joy of feeling so alive in that moment. You felt like a girl playing in the rain and despite the coldness of the falling water, you felt a certain warmth traveling from the tips of your fingers to your chest.
Although he was sure that you were an excellent rider, your husband insisted on taking you on his own horse to avoid any accidents and you agreed without complaint. His body sheltered you all the way to the Red Keep and once there, under the roof, he helped you down from the chair with extreme care. You didn't think he was that strong until you felt him grab your waist and place you on the floor effortlessly.
“Ask the maids to prepare a bath for you, or you will catch a cold,” he said, putting on your back a cloak he had found hanging on one of the walls.
There was the hint of a smile on his face and seeing him behave like this towards you made you feel weird. You almost felt like he was trying to be affectionate with you, even though he wasn't quite succeeding.
“You should do the same,” you exclaimed softly.
Motivated by the kind moment you had shared, you reached out to brush away the wet hair that had stuck to his face and he shivered at your touch. It was the first time you touched him that way, out of conviction and with care.
“Your majesty, Lord Hand is looking for you. He says he needs to talk to you urgently."
“My grandfather,” he sighed at you, as if wanting to apologize for the words the guard behind you had just said.
He gave the man Moonshadow's reins and then explained that someone had to go get the horse you had left in the bay, so you assumed your presence there was no longer necessary. You were about to leave when he stopped you, grabbing your arm somewhat roughly and looking at you with a feeling that you couldn't decipher.
“I'll go to your room tonight,” he informed.
You felt a little disappointed by the reality of having to share a bed with him, after so long without having done so, but you were grateful that he was at least warning you.
You nodded your goodbyes and he did the same, forming an unspoken agreement. You thought maybe that was why he had been polite to you, so he could get back under your bed sheets. But there was no point in doing it, he wasn't courting you to win your hand, but you were already his wife and he had made it very clear that he could do with you whatever he wanted.
Still a little confused, you were escorted to your bedroom, where you hoped that a tub with hot water and essences would be enough to appease all those doubts that were growing in you.
FIFTH ACT: LOVE
At some point Aegon would get tired of all this, you were sure. But while that moment arrived, you were thoroughly enjoying all kinds of attention you received from your husband. He kept his promise to bring golden roses for the gardens and although the queen wasn’t very happy, in the end they adorned some of the busiest sections of the place. You took that as an act of good faith, so you thought that maybe the thought of repaying him for some of the decency he was showing you wouldn't kill you.
There wasn’t a single breakfast that you skipped, except when the prince was required for political matters or had to travel. You were too proud to admit that you had begun to genuinely enjoy his company, as you still had some distrust due to how temperamental the man was. It wasn't all sunshine and flowers, as the young man still had some outbursts that made you fear him and reminded you that this was who you were really talking to.
His drinking habits hadn’t changed much, since although he was able to handle it during the first week after that period, it was inevitable that he would go back to his old ways and drink an entire jug of wine in a couple of minutes. With sex it was the same, because he continued to fuck you without signs of care and regularly when he was lost in drink. It amused you to think that perhaps that was the reason why you still didn't carry a child in your womb; that he was too drunk when you tried to be of any use.
However, as your relationship strengthened you could notice slight (you almost swore they were imaginary) changes when having sex. He was no longer as rough towards your body as before and tried to thrust into you a little slower, as if he wanted to lengthen the moment and not just unload into you and sleep like a baby after that. Maybe it was just that the drink made him lethargic, but he had even started seeking your lips in the middle of the act or kissing everything within reach of the skin on your neck. You didn't intend to spend much time analyzing his behavior because for you it already represented a victory that he had stopped hurting you after every time you had sex and, honestly, you didn't want to inquire about it. Once again you thought it was more prudent not to question the prince and simply let him continue behaving that way.
Until one night, things looked different for you.
When you heard your husband open the door, quite late at night, and saw him approach your bed, you knew that the same dynamic of nighttime visits would take place. Aegon, already hard as a rock, would kiss you a few times, undress, order you to undress, and then position on top of you to satisfy himself. Needless to say, under the confidence that being in the dark gave you and your husband's lack of interest, you looked away or concentrated on something else while your martyrdom was carried out. He would finish, lie naked next to you, and then sleep soundly with no memory the next morning of what had happened.
Aegon called your name, just to check that you were awake or otherwise wake you up, and you were surprised to hear that his voice sounded quite normal. He wasn't slurring his words like usual.
"Your grace?" you called back, propping yourself up on your elbows so you could look at him.
He did what was expected and as soon as he was far enough away, he started kissing you. You must have known something was wrong from that first moment, when he grabbed your cheek with his wide hand and offered you the most passionate kiss you had ever had. It is reiterated that Aegon was always somewhat careless in intimacy, but this first contact hadn’t felt as impatient as others, but rather was something more careful and planned.
Only one other man had kissed you like that in your life and although the feeling brewing in your chest must have been pleasant, the truth was that it wasn't. You had endured too much abuse from the white-haired man so your body didn't know how to react otherwise. That's why when he continued kissing you for longer than usual and then laid you down meekly, you couldn't do anything but tense uncomfortably.
You were only in your nightgown so there wasn't much difficulty in sliding the straps to the side, almost exposing your tits. Suddenly Aegon lowered his kisses to your neck, where his stubble scratched your skin. Knowing that he would be busy in that area, you turned your head away to focus your gaze on a tapestry on the wall. However, you got a surprise when you felt the prince move away from you and then a bigger one when he took your face between his fingers, placing his index finger and thumb on each of your cheeks to force you to look at him. At first you thought there was anger in his eyes, but after looking at them for a second more you concluded that the feeling was more like that of someone insulted. And why? you asked yourself. What had you done that had offended the prince?
“Why are you looking away?”
His question had a certain aggressive tone, but, at the same time, he sounded hurt. With that you confirmed that he wasn’t drunk or that, if he was, he had drunk just enough to make him feel slightly dizzy. You couldn't tell the way your eyes looked at him, but Aegon interpreted your expression as one of disdain.
Unbeknownst to you, he had his own whirlwind of feelings inside him, one that was driving him crazy and causing him to look you up and down while still holding you. He’d never been like this on another night, so you were at the mercy of knowing how good or bad that would turn out.
Suddenly he seemed upset, you would even say disgusted, and surprisingly stood up from his position. The cold air hit you where he had been before and you sat on the bed to watch him, completely confused by the way he was behaving.
"What's going on…?"
“You don't want this,” he spoke firmly. It was obvious that you didn't want to and you wondered how he had barely realized it. “Not like that… I… no. Not this way"
His babbling confused you even more and when you saw him walk away with exaggerated steps until he left through the door, you couldn't help but feel totally amazed.
What was the reason for what your husband had just done?
The feeling of being abandoned was more hopeless than having him fuck you would have been, and for a moment you even felt ashamed. Maybe he didn't like you anymore or he would just go and cure his frustration in the bed of a woman you didn't know.
He had watched you very strangely and the whole scene wasn't like him. You even pinched yourself just to check that it wasn't some strange dream, getting a moan of pain in response to your question. You thought that perhaps you were acting impulsively, but barely a minute later you put on a green robe over your nightgown and headed towards the door, still not knowing exactly what you were going to do.
“Where are you going, your grace?” the guard on duty asked, putting his voluptuous body in your way.
“Prince Aegon, do you know where he went?”
“In that direction, your majesty. But I'm afraid I must recommend that you return to your room, it is dangerous to walk around the palace at this time."
“But I wish to see my husband,” you said firmly.
The man let out a sigh and then slid to the side of the hallway, leaving you a clear path. Even so, when you started walking you felt his footsteps following you because he probably wanted to make sure that something didn't happen to you. You walked for a while, but you knew it was useless when all you found were locked doors that you couldn't knock on and that you couldn't open either. If Aegon was in any of those rooms, you wouldn't know it. Defeated, you returned to your room and, as expected, found it empty again.
The next morning there wasn’t a single word about that event, but it was present in your mind throughout the day. You had already lived with him enough to realize that something was bothering him, however, upon noticing that he was less talkative during your usual breakfast, you decided to give him time.
You were about to leave the table when he stopped you, asking you to take your seat again and looking at you seriously.
“I have to travel for a couple of weeks,” he informed you. You were surprised to hear that he almost sounded sad “The king is required on some business and since my father can no longer travel, I will have to do it.”
“I hope the entire journey is favorable and the visit profitable, your grace,” you exclaimed cordially. However, your husband didn’t seem pleased with it.
One of his hands slid to hold yours, with a strength that surprised you. There was urgency in his grip, like he needed to hold on to something.
“Is that all you have to say?”
A couple of wrinkles appeared on your brow, as you clearly weren't understanding what he expected of you. Accompanying him would be reckless and you didn't know if he wanted you to keep him there at King's landing.
During those last months something had changed in the man's face, because those eyes surrounded by purple marks no longer saw you with the same aversion as the first time. And it disheartened Aegon that his attempts to please you were yielding no apparent fruit. He was giving you time, effort, and being kind to you like you had said was necessary, but he still couldn't help but feel that you still considered him a stranger.
He had been patient because he thought that, as time went by, you would begin to seek him out or not shy away from his touch. Aegon cared a lot about the physical, so every time he sneaked into your room he did so with the hope that you would welcome him with open arms and give yourself to him willingly. Countless nights he waited in his own room for you to show up to keep him warm and love him throughout the night. But it never happened and a part of him couldn't blame you either.
However, he was already tired of it. He wanted to make it clear to you that he not only wanted to give, but also receive. But forcing you to do anything would ruin everything; you had to want it.
“Have I said something that offended you, prince?”
“I just thought you would say you were going to miss me”
A laugh echoed in your throat at those words and for a second Aegon felt hurt, like you were mocking you. He was going to let go of your hand and walk away, insulted, but you squeezed his hand harder as a sign that you didn't want him to do that.
“I'm sorry, I didn't mean to laugh at you. I just didn't think that if I harbored feelings of that kind they would be of interest to your majesty."
“Do you miss me when you don't see me?” he asked now, allowing himself to be vulnerable in front of you “Or are you glad to have me away?”
You didn't know what those direct questions were about, because you didn't expect that a man like him would be plagued by uncertainty about knowing the answers.
“Not at all. I will always be willing to be with you whenever you want.”
“And you want to be with me?” he insisted.
“I think that what I want is not important”
“But I'm trying to make it so. I thought I was making it clear enough,”
He was angry, but not for the reasons you might think. It frustrated him that he was trying hard to improve and that your eyes continued to see him like that first time. Too many people were already observing him like that and he thought that, perhaps, since you were the most recent to do it, you could also be the first in whom he could manage to modify it.
You, however, were still too confused by his signs. Sometimes his attitude didn’t coincide with the intentions he had, since antipathy was often the only emotion with which he allowed himself to express and feel, accustomed to what he received during all his years of life.
All those months of effort were a direct product of the talk you had had with him, of that moment of weakness in which, instead of ignoring him like everyone else did, you had stayed with him. Aegon was aware that the treatment towards you was sometimes inhumane and he couldn’t explain how despite this you had wiped away his tears with such care, expressing nothing more than an act of integrity. Sometimes he even just imposed things on you to see if he could push you to the limit and he was surprised to see that you endured everything with honor and decency. You were good, something he could never be.
He didn't want to hear anything more and then let go of your hand, feeling rejected again.
"Majesty…"
"It's getting late. I have to go feed Sunfyre so he can endure the trip.”
“Will you travel by dragon?”
“How else would a Targaryen do it?” expressed obviously.
You were silent for a moment and then he stood up, ready to fulfill his obligations. In the afternoon he had already left, without emotional goodbyes or anything like that.
You had those weeks alone to reflect on everything that had been happening. You firmly believed that a cruel and evil person would always be that way, even if they hid it, because humans can’t change from one day to the next. Still, you had to allow Aegon the courtesy of admitting that he wasn't being a complete jerk lately.
You tried to think of any unpleasant moments with him during that week and although you found a couple, you realized that they had all been because of minor arguments or simply that one of the two of you had woken up in a bad mood. The hatred for the boy had been so ingrained in you that now it was difficult to decipher how much of it was due to things that were really happening and how much of it was a resentment carried from the past, at the beginning of that harmful relationship that existed between you.
He was no longer a mean man to you, he just sometimes had those logical slips for anyone who has never been taught to love. He didn't know how to care for you, how to talk to you, or even how to touch you properly. He had always existed alone and could still be seen reflected in his incessant desire for you to be the one to look for him, in his longing to know that you would miss him during his absence and in wanting you to look forward to his return. He wanted you to pay attention to him. He needed it.
One fine afternoon the vision of Sunfyre finally appeared in the bright blue of the sky, with you watching from the huge window of your room. He looked majestic, flying deftly and confidently with the rider above him grinning from ear to ear. Aegon had once confessed to you that he loved to fly on his dragon and he spoke about it with a devotion that completely touched you.
You thought about going to look for him, grateful that he had returned, but you were afraid that your presence would bother him or, in that case, that there would be murmurs about you. You didn't want to seem like a desperate wife so you thought it would be best to look for him at dinner time and in case he wanted to see you before, you stayed in your room all afternoon.
Once night fell, you put on one of your prettiest dresses and went to the royal dining room hoping to find him there, but it was in vain. Luckily one of the cooks had seen him and he told you that he was in his room, since he had ordered that something to eat and drink be brought there.
Determined, you made your way there and took a moment before entering. You hoped that the time away from King's landing had not hardened your lover's character, because it would be a shame to waste what you had built for some time and have to start over, or not do it at all, which would be even worse. Since there were no guards at the door, you were able to push the wood without any hindrance and then you saw it.
Aegon was sitting near the fireplace, his back to the entrance and leaning against a table that had a jug that you assumed was full (or not so full anymore) of wine. When he heard your footsteps he turned slightly and when he saw you, he kept a serene expression on his face.
“Hey,” he exclaimed quietly.
“The maids informed me that you were here” you explained and he nodded.
You noticed that he no longer wore his black doublet with the Targaryen emblem, he only kept the breeches of the same color and a mint-colored linen shirt that left part of his chest exposed. His white hair had some natural curls that fell delicately over her shoulders.
“Yeah. I don't feel like seeing my parents.”
“I understand” you assumed that if he hadn't wanted to see you he wouldn't have hesitated to tell you, so you approached him. Undecided whether you should greet him with a kiss or just stay to the side, you placed your hands on his shoulders and leaned a little to look at him “How was the trip?”
“It was good,” he responded with reluctance. “But my body feels completely crushed”
“Hm. It shows” you whispered, amused. The tension in his body was palpable and that's why you began to massage him, pressing hard just where he needed it. Aegon, feeling your skilled hands doing this, let out a satisfied grunt and leaned his head back with his eyes closed.
Doing that wasn’t something you had planned when you went there, it had only happened out of the heat of the moment and the reality that your husband's body was taking its toll on him for the hours he had spent riding his dragon.
With each passing second Aegon's burden felt lighter and lighter, wondering where you had learned those movements and how your hands were strong enough to exert the right pressure.
"Feel better?" you asked kindly and he nodded immediately, eyes still closed.
Suddenly one of your hands slid lower, towards his chest, to caress him. This time your fingers were light as feathers, sending an electrical current up and down the man's spine under your touch. No whore had ever touched him like that, with that force and at the same time so delicately.
But it was clear that you were not a whore. You were his wife.
“Come here,” he said firmly, reaching out to wrap his hand around your wrist and pulling you directly into his lap.
It was extremely painful to admit that he had missed you. He was physically frustrated because he hadn't dared to take any other woman in your absence. It had been a long time since he had frequented pleasure houses, since his appetite was awakened only by being with you.
What the hell had you done to him?
“The cook told me that you ordered some food, but I only see wine around here. Have you already eaten anything?”
“Mhmm,” he said absently. Your legs dangled to the side and one of his hands came up to your face, brushing your loose hair away from it. The other one surrounded you until it planted itself firmly on your belly. “Still no signs of anything?”
“Honestly, I don't know. The maesters can’t say with certainty… I am sorry”
“What if you are sterile?” the mere possibility of it made you nervous and you wondered what your fate would be if that was the case. Aegon didn't look so worried “What a disappointment for Alicent.”
You didn't know how to take that, because on the one hand it could be that your husband was amused by the irony of the matter and on the other hand it was that he would never have wanted to have children with you. For a moment you thought that the tranquility of the environment had been fragmented by this, but it turned out that the man couldn't care less. He was completely focused on your lips, almost as if hypnotized.
“I trust that is not the case, your grace. Just… it was a streak of bad luck.”
“I guess so,” he murmured nonchalantly. He was still watching your mouth when you spoke “But now I don’t care much about that.”
He carefully grabbed you by the back of your neck and brought you closer to shorten the distance, giving you an eager kiss that took your breath away. The hand that was on your waist pulled you closer to his body, leaving practically no separation between you and him. You could feel the desperation on his lips and in his touch, like he was eager to make you his. And at the same time, he was kissing you like he had never done before: it was sweet, yearning, passionate. You felt like he really wanted you.
He separated from you so you could breathe and, as best he could, he maneuvered to lift your body until he placed you on the table, where it was easier for him to place himself in the space between your legs. You instinctively placed your hands around his neck and wrapped one of your legs around his body.
“I longed for you. These weeks” you finally confessed. You heard him, and felt him, breathe more erratically at this because your words had fallen on him with the force of an axe.
From there, Aegon acted solely driven by the feeling of knowing that you had wanted to see him as much as he had wanted to see you.
His entire body leaned over you to kiss you, with the same urgency as at the beginning. While he did that he grabbed you by the lower back, pulling you until your body collided with his crotch which, if it wasn't already hard, wouldn't take long.
His kisses were clumsy due to urgency and after a while he moved away from your mouth to descend to your neck. Sometimes he left a kiss or two, at most, but this time he seemed to want to take his time. His tongue ran all over your skin, freshly washed, and he spread caresses without restraint. Every place the dragon's lips touched lit up with fire and his hips grinding against you weren't doing much for the blush on your cheeks. Inevitably you began to sigh from so many stimuli, right at the level of his ear, which only motivated him to continue.
As best he could he pulled the laces on the back of your dress and it didn't take long to get rid of the restraints. He slid one of your sleeves over your shoulder to begin kissing that section, the same way he had done with your neck. An indiscreet moan escaped you as your husband bit into your soft flesh and you could feel him smile against your skin.
“You're mine, right?” he sighed brokenly. You had tilted your head back to give him more space and he took the opportunity to lower the entire torso of your dress. “Only mine…”
With the same devotion he took care of your breasts and you couldn't do anything but continue alternating between sighs and some muffled moans. You could feel how he longed for you, eager to be able to kiss every inch of your skin even if it took him the entire night. Suddenly your body had become a temple, an object worthy of worship. The prince continued to distribute kisses that each time descended towards your belly, until with one hand he violently threw everything that was on the table and you ended up lying completely on it. Then he walked away.
You were about to ask what had happened when he took care of taking off your ballerina flats and throwing them somewhere far away in the room, only to stretch your leg up to the height of his torso to start kissing it. No one, not even him, had ever done that to you, so it was natural for you to be dismayed. His kisses moved quickly up your thigh and once he did that, he dropped to his knees in front of you. The skirt of your dress blocked your view and when you tried to get up something made you scream. Aegon had bitten into the tender flesh of your thighs, quite close to your crotch and with more force than he had hit your shoulder. You could only imagine his face when he carefully licked the mark he had surely left on you, once again making your chest exhale a moan.
What he did next and the sensation it caused, you could never have even imagined. That mouth, which most of the time was used for ironic puns and sloppy kisses, was now taking expert care of all of your pussy. Aegon was devouring you completely, touching just where it was necessary to make you squirm on the table. He wasn't careful at all; it was a touch hungry and extremely dirty.
You wanted to hold on as much as you could to keep yourself attached to reality, but it was difficult with your husband eating you like that. One of his arms wrapped around your leg and placed it over his shoulder, probably to give him better access. You had never moaned like that in his presence and it only made him harder and harder beneath the tight fabric of his breeches.
The pleasure was barely getting to your head when he stopped and a dissatisfied grunt escaped you shamelessly. Aegon laughed unabashedly at this, pleased at the control he had gained over you, and then went up again to kiss you hungrily. You couldn't do anything but welcome his salty lips and you moaned against him as he leaned against your body and you could feel his crotch, not knowing if it was your own wetness or his that was present.
He held you from behind and, without stopping kissing you, carried you until he placed you on the bed. You considered it somewhat unfair that your husband already had you trembling beneath him and still hadn't taken off a single piece of clothing, but your complaints were silenced when he hurriedly pulled his shirt over his head and took off his breeches in record time. In the same way, he pulled your dress towards your legs so that a second later it ended up on the floor, along with everything else.
He knelt down on the mattress and spread your legs roughly, lining himself up with your entrance. He began to rub the tip of his member up and down your already wet center and that did nothing but drive you crazy again.
When a delicate, pleading, «please» escaped your swollen lips, Aegon knew it was more stimulating to have you begging for him than to worry about only satisfying himself.
He played with you for a while longer, smiling from ear to ear at the sight of his delicate, pretty wife vibrating from having him close, until he finally plunged into you. For the first time there was enough wetness in you that the stroke felt satisfying rather than painful and both of you let out a delicious moan.
He set the pace, slow at first, but after a while his movements became more desperate. He wanted to get to the core of you, he wanted to fill you completely so you knew that only he could make you feel that way. When his body began to ache he leaned towards you, resting each of his arms on the side of your head and looking directly at you. You had stopped looking away from him, now you were looking at him with your mouth open with pleasure, your eyes watery and your pupils dilated on your completely flushed cheeks.
“Aegon,” you sobbed pathetically, clouded by everything you were experiencing and proving that it wasn't long before you reached your orgasm.
You had never called him by his name. You always referred to him as «your grace», «prince» or «husband», at best. So hearing his name come out of your lips like that, under those circumstances, was too much for him to bear.
Knowing that he couldn't last much longer, one of his hands moved down to rest his thumb on your clit and once there he began to make erratic circles. You closed your eyes, completely seized by pleasure and a couple more thrusts were enough to make you lose the battle. Hearing your whimpers, combined with the way your walls squeezed him, was enough to make him cum too. With trembling legs you felt the warm liquid filling you and, for the first time, it was comforting.
When Aegon plopped down next to you, you immediately missed his body warmth. Both of you were breathing heavily, trying to catch the breath that the orgasm had taken from you. You could clearly feel your heartbeat bouncing off your bare chest and the stinging sensation coming from your crotch and running through your entire body was something you could get used to. Your hair had stuck to your face from the sweat and not to mention your lips, which you felt were burning from your husband's attention.
Aegon had already had many orgasms in his life so this time he decided to turn his gaze a little to see you enjoying yours. The mere idea that he was responsible for your condition made him completely shake.
“You look beautiful,” he blurted out suddenly. You thought he had heard wrong because of the rush, but from the way he was smiling at you, you highly doubted it. “Just like that”
“Like what?”
“Freshly fucked. Well fucked” he corrected himself.
A laugh bubbled up from within you and you blushed even more, if that was possible, perhaps from the nerves and elation of what had just happened. The man stood up a little from his seat and leaned down to kiss you, although this time he did it with a calm and affection that you never thought you would see in him. It was just that he couldn't deny it anymore; from that moment on he would become an open book for you, where you could see all his feelings, desires and fears.
“I don't know why you're doing this,” you suddenly murmured and Aegon pulled away enough to look at you “And I don't know why you've been acting like this these past few months. But I like it. I think it's a good time for you to know."
“You said I could choose who I am,” he said meekly. One of his hands grabbed your chin and stole another fleeting kiss from you. “I haven't forgotten, every word is present in my head. It's just... sometimes it's hard. And I thought I would have a better chance with you, even with the things I did to you when we got married”
You smiled at him and were happy to know that the change in his behavior was because of the talk you once had with him. If he continued like this, ignoring the demons inside him and trying to be better, then your marriage had a chance to become more than just a condemnation.
Driven by the pleasant feeling growing in your chest you reached out towards him to reward him with a kiss. The man's breath hitched when you pushed him to the side and reversed roles, now you being the one pampering him while he was lying down. There was a playful glint in your husband's eyes as you looked at him.
“Do you know this is the first time you kissed me?” he exhaled softly.
You couldn't believe that was possible and for a few seconds you tried to remember so you could contradict him. But every time you remembered you realized that it was always him who initiated the contact to which you only responded, so, effectively, it was the first kiss you gave him out of conviction.
Maybe it was an omen that something good was coming.
Still happy with how everything had turned out, you snuggled into his side, your head resting on his chest while he hugged you and threw a sheet over your bodies. You planted a hand on his bare skin and began drumming your fingers, alternating with small circles made with the greatest delicacy.
You were silent for a long time, you even thought that your husband had fallen asleep until you heard him speak again:
“It's also the first time I'm doing this.”
“Are you talking about sex, your grace?”
“No, I'm talking about cuddling,” he confessed softly, his hand caressing your back the same way you did with him, “And don't call me your majesty anymore. I am Aegon. Or my prince, at any rate. But my is important”
With the affection worthy of a wife, you raised your head to place a kiss on his cheek and assured him that from now on you would call him that in the privacy of your chambers.
Suddenly, after another moment of silence, Aegon pulled you close to him as if afraid you were going to suddenly evaporate. Intending to calm his fears, you climbed until you were on top of his body, hiding your head in his neck so that the distance became minimal.
There was silence for another couple of minutes.
“Do you think I can ever be forgiven?”
Apparently the atmosphere of the moment had managed to soften the boy's heart.
“We can all be absolved, Aegon.”
"And you?"
"Me what?"
“Do you think you can ever love me?” you were quiet for a second, thinking about your response. Then, he added “Or could you at least try? It would be a nice detail for me. No one has ever done it before.”
Not wanting to ruin the mood with a false word you decided to kiss his neck gently and that was enough of an answer for him. He would have to trust in your goodwill and that he could continue to restrain his impulses to keep this newly discovered gem that was his wife. With some luck you could even be that person he prayed for so much all his life, one with whom he could feel safe.
The slowing of the man's breathing revealed to you that he had already fallen asleep and you discovered that it seemed not so bad to find yourself in that position, sheltered by your lover's arms.
Under that scenario, the idea of eventually loving Prince Aegon Targaryen no longer sounded so far-fetched.
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poguehearted77 · 3 months ago
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OBX Season 5: Payback for Maybank - masterlist
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Actor! Au Pairing: Actress! Reader x Drew Starkey Your Character: Piper Monroe, a jack of all trades whose hustle was making a living as an arms dealer in Morocco. Until a group of foreigners find her with an appetite for revenge, and she decides to tag along.
These can be read in any order, the season summary is just to give you some background on the character and role you played in the final season. In this mini series you'll get to see what really goes on behind the scenes.
Lmk if you want to be added to the tag list <3
Season Summary: This season, the Pogues are back, and their hunt for Chandler Groff leads them through the scorching sands of Morocco—and straight into your path, a mischievous arms dealer with secrets as deep as your scars. Due to your betrayal, the Pogues are ambushed and barely survive, saved only by your last-minute change of heart. Even after your redemption and display of loyalty, Rafe still doesn’t trust you, and in your uneasy alliance, he keeps you close, sometimes too close. Tension crackles between you, with moments where his knife is at your throat, yet something unspoken simmers beneath the surface. In the final episode, as danger closes in, confessions boil over when you and Rafe find yourselves held hostage by the leader of the mercenaries, Finch. During your time in bondage, you connect on feelings of solitude and regrets, but you see a spark in him when he mentions a girl back home, a reason to keep fighting. It's a race against time before Finch comes back to kill you. To both your frustration, critical thinking and strategic camaraderie are necessary for your escape. When you find yourselves stuck in a sticky situation amidst your escape, you make the ultimate sacrifice for Rafe, reminding him, “You have someone to live for,” before initiating a human diversion in a suicide mission, giving Rafe the chance to make it back to the Pogues, giving him a second chance.
Below the cut you’ll find my masterlist of life behind the scenes of season 5. Including premiere appearances, bloopers, red carpets, interviews and your budding romance with Drew.
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Lights, Camera, Action! -> It's your first day on set and your nerves are through the roof but the cast makes you feel at home. You practice your lines, but the sparks between you and Drew are unscripted.
Between the Lines -> It's the little things that go on behind the scenes between you and Drew that makes your chemistry electric.
Co-Star Confessions-> The cast takes you along for a trip to take a lie detector test. The jokes are rolling and the tea starts to spill.
Portugal Nights-> The day was tense. Rehearsals were much more heated than the lines intended and the thin rubber band of restraint holding you both apart was bound to snap, and it finally does.
The Wrap Party-> Filming is over and that's a wrap for Outer Banks. Things get emotional but Drew knows how to cheer you up.-coming soon (January 2025!)
Limelight -> Due to your smaller role in the season compared to the main cast, you only had a few solo interviews but not without a few surprises. -coming soon
Wardrobe Malfunction-> You and Drew were scheduled to make it to the red carpet by 8 sharp, but not everything goes as planned.-coming soon
Ship Wars-> The fans are back at it again, and the shipping continues. Debating that Piper and Rafe should've had a romantic arc. You and Drew are given a special interview to address them.-coming soon
The Power Couple-> Drew finally made things official, so you began to have your fun with the fans and let them put the pieces together.-coming soon
The After Party-> The champagne is bubbly in your systems when you and Drew are stumbling into your hotel room after the party.-coming soon
I do not own or take credit for the characters or cast of outer banks. These are all pure fiction and do not accurately reflect the cast.
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prythianpages · 4 months ago
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A Light That Never Goes Out | Azriel
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Azriel x Rhysand's sister (reader) | The aftermath of Azriel kissing you in front of everyone in the Court of Nightmares.
warnings: angry Rhys, angry High Lord, brief mention of Tamsand, mating bond snapping
word count: roughly 3K, around 3.5K if you read the bonus scene
a/n: This is a part two to this but can be read as a stand alone. I had fun writing this but I worry this sounded better in my head. I was tempted to turn this into a crack fic bc of this trending tiktok sound.
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Azriel kisses you, consequences be damned. His hand slides from yours to the nape of your neck, drawing you closer. You kiss him back with the same intensity, years of longing and love pouring into this single moment. Your mind and thoughts tangling with his, the bond between you surging with emotion. Desire and hope. He’s still in disbelief that tonight was the first night he told you he loved you.
But in truth, Azriel had been telling you all along—in every glance, every touch, every kiss that held more than words ever could.
Azriel’s shadows recoil as the two of you pull apart, breathless. The Court of Nightmares had faded away, the two of you lost in each other. It’s just you and him, as it is meant to be…Until the distinctive footsteps of your father approaching echoes throughout the ballroom. Your eyes are wide, too many emotions swirling within their depths. 
But Azriel is relieved that regret is not one of them.
“Azriel.”
The High Lord’s voice is calm and collected but the fury flickering in his violet eyes is unmistakable. He stands no more than two feet away, the authority radiating from him as cold as it is absolute. Beside him, Rhysand watches, his expression unreadable. 
Your father lifts a hand, wisps of darkness and starlight spilling from his fingertips. The orchestra resumes under the silent command and driven by some invisible force, the guests resume dancing and drinking. As if nothing had happened. 
“Come with me,” your father says, his tone leaving no room for argument. His command is directed solely at Azriel. “I’d like to have a word.”
 You try to hold on to Azriel, to keep him close, but he slips his fingers from yours, bowing his head in quiet submission to your father. Without another word, he follows after him. And though his command had been directed solely at Azriel, the weight of the situation falls on the both of you. 
So you step forward, determined to follow after them. But just as you step outside the ballroom, Rhysand grasps your arm, forcing you to a stop.
“You stupid, foolish…,” his voice trails off in frustration. “What have you done?”
You spin on him, eyes flashing with anger as you yank your arm out of his hold. “What have I done? What about what have you done? Planning marriage alliances behind my back? Like I’m some pawn on your chessboard?”
Rhysand’s gaze softens for a brief moment. “Y/n, I–”
“No.” You interrupt sharply, starlight beginning to swirl from the fingertip you point at him. You don’t want to hear his excuse, whatever justification he thinks will make this right. Out of the corner of your eye, you see Cassian and Mor making their way toward you, slipping through the dancing couples and out of the ballroom. 
The starlight seeping from your fingertip glows brighter, ready and poised to attack. However, it’s your words you speak into his mind that make the blow instead.
“You know, if you love that runt from Spring so much, why don’t you marry him yourself?”
Rhysand’s eyes widen, his brows furrowing as the meaning of your words hit him. The revelation that you know his secret. Where he’d sneak off to some nights. Why the scent of crisp rain and earth lingered on him when he’d return. You and Azriel had pieced it together after Cassian had mentioned that his book on Illyrian training and methods suddenly went missing. Given your secret, you and Azriel had kept that information to yourselves, waiting for the moment Rhysand would feel comfortable to tell you himself. 
It takes him a moment to regain his composure, for his gaze to harden again. His lips curl into a snarl–a warning.  “Y/n.”
He leans in forward but you take a step back and winnow away, only one thing on your mind. Finding Azriel.
**
The walk to the High Lord’s private office in the Court of Nightmares is silent but the sense of foreboding is nearly deafening. Azriel is tense, his shadows quiet and burrowing into his leathers. Too many possibilities and consequences storm through his mind, each one more damning than the last.
Does he regret kissing you in front of everyone? No.
That kiss was the first honest, uninhibited thing he’d allowed himself to do in years. It was freeing, exhilarating to be able to show everyone, especially the sons of Spring and Autumn that you were his and he was yours. He could face death for this—for touching the High Lord’s daughter. For kissing you so openly, so brazenly, in front of the entire court.
But why? Why should it be so wrong for him to love you? Because of his birth? The scars of his past that marked him as unworthy? He’s served loyally. Bled for this court.Tortured for this court. 
He’s watched from the shadows as lords and sons, full of false charm, have circled you like vultures, eyeing you as nothing more than a prize to be claimed.  And yet, when he—who knows you, who cherishes you—shows his love, it is considered a crime.
It isn’t fair. But Azriel has never been afforded fairness. 
The heavy doors to the High Lord's office swing open with a wave of his hand, and Azriel steps inside. The air is thick with tension, and every muscle in his body tightens. The High Lord gestures for him to sit, but Azriel bows his head, respectfully declining. Standing feels safer. Less vulnerable. He wonders if his refusal will anger the High Lord further, but the single shadow curling at his ear reports no rising fury.
He can feel the weight of the High Lord’s gaze—it’s heavy, scrutinizing, like the cold press of a blade against his skin. He keeps his eyes forward, even though his heart pounds in his chest. If there’s punishment to be had, Azriel will accept it.
The High Lord moves to his desk, positioned beneath an oculus, where moonlight spills through and dances across his features. He gazes up at the starlit sky as if searching for answers—or perhaps, waiting.
“Normally, this is the part where people like you should be begging for forgiveness, for a way to rectify your mistake.”
Azriel’s jaw tightens. “I haven’t made a mistake.”
“No?” The High Lord’s gaze snaps back to him, piercing as if he could peel away Azriel’s very skin to lay bare his soul. Azriel wonders, for a brief moment, if your daemati powers had been inherited from your father. Could the High Lord see into his mind, his thoughts? Have kept this power to himself all these years as a secret weapon? 
“You sound so sure of yourself,” the High Lord continues, his tone sharpening. “Tell me, how long has this... affair been going on?”
“For decades.” Azriel admits, knowing that there was no use in lying. The truth was already written in the way he kissed you, in the way he looked at you as you broke away from the kiss.
“For decades?” The High Lord repeats, his expression darkening, violet eyes narrowing. “You took my daughter’s first dance tonight of all nights.”
Azriel’s silence says everything. Both of them aware that Azriel had taken more than dances, more than a kiss.
“You’ve taken her innocence. You’ve ruined her…” The High Lord continues to seethe in that cool, unnerving tone.
Azriel’s fingers twitch at his sides, fighting the urge to reach for his dagger. Not to defend himself, but because it’s his only comfort in moments like these.
But this is not a battle to be fought with daggers or swords. This is a battle of love, of politics, of status. One he’s had no training for yet one he’s willing to fight. After all, it wouldn’t be the first time he’d fight against all odds.
“Whether she marries Spring or Autumn, she will become a lady of the highest esteem and forge a strong alliance with my court. Laden with all the riches and wonders only a High Lord can offer. What can you offer? You don’t even have a proper last name to give her, Shadowsinger.”
Azriel swallows thickly, the weight and shame of his low-born status crashing into him like the violent current of Illyria’s river. It feels like he’s sinking under it, drowning in it. He knows he can’t offer you what any son of Spring or Autumn could. He had reminded you of that—again and again. 
It’s as if you can feel his doubts creeping back in, the poison of guilt and worthlessness seeping in. Your presence—soft, warm, and steady—enters his mind. You bring forth the memory you had shared with him moments ago on the dance floor again.
“I can’t give you much,” his voice had dropped to a whisper, barely a rasp as he leaned his forehead against yours. His nose brushed against yours, his lips hovering just over your own. “But I can give you everything I have.”
“That’s all I’ll ever need,” you had replied, the words echoing now in his mind, like an antidote to the venom of doubt. That’s all I’ll ever need, that’s all I’ll ever need, that’s all—
“I asked you a question, Azriel.” The High Lord’s sharp voice cut through the memory, yanking him back to the cold, oppressive reality of the Court of Nightmares. “What can you offer in exchange for my daughter?”
Azriel’s knees buckle beneath him before he even realizes it. He drops to the floor, bowing his head low. His shadows stir, swirling around him in a frenzy, urging him to stand. To stop him.
“My life.”
“Your life,” The High Lord muses. He lets out a dark, humorless chuckle. “You love my daughter enough to give your life for her?”
“Yes,” Azriel says, his voice firm and steady, even as his shadows coil tighter around his arms, trying to pull him back from this path. But he stays rooted to the floor. His life, his soul—it all belongs to you anyway. What was it worth, if not to protect you? To be yours?
The High Lord’s eyes narrow as he studies the swirling shadows, dark and restless, wrapping themselves around Azriel’s form. Shadowsingers are rare. Their power is precious. They can see and hear things others can’t. The only known living one kneels before him now. 
Despite his low born status, the Shadowsinger had also proved himself a formidable, Illyrian warrior. A Carynthian. It’s why he appointed Azriel as the Night Court’s spymaster.  
And now this powerful and strong male is offering his life.
To have a Shadowsinger as his spymaster is rare, a gift in itself. To have Azriel’s loyalty, his strength, his skills bound by magic for life. A weapon of mass destruction, at his beck and call. No room for betrayal, no worry over him leaving his court for another.
 All in exchange for your hand in marriage? 
Now, that sounds like a deal.
He lets out a thoughtful hum, voicing his consideration. He could give Azriel a title, raise him from his bastard status. At his will, darkness begins to rise from the floor. The power of the bargain hovers in the air between them, ready to etch itself into both their skins. 
 Azriel finally lifts his head, meeting the High Lord’s eyes with no fear. Only the light of determination. He is willing to give his life to your father if that’s what it takes to be by your side. 
The cloud of darkness begins to separate, its dark tendrils moving toward him, the binding magic poised to seal his fate, to chain him to this bargain for the rest of his life.
But before it can touch his skin, before the deal can be made, a bright light erupts in the room. A sharp hiss escapes the darkness as it recoils, retreating back into the shadows where it had come from. Azriel’s own shadows seem to shudder in relief.
Both Azriel and the High Lord’s heads snap toward the source of the light. You stand at the doors, your eyes wide and brimming with unshed tears, your hands glowing with pure, raging starlight.
“No!” you cry, the word trembling on your lips as you step forward, the glow around you growing even brighter. 
Your eyes lock with Azriel’s and something tightens in his chest, crawling up his rib cage. It’s sharp and breathtaking. His hand grabs at his chest and yours does the same. 
”He will not be your slave,” you say, turning to your father with the same determination flashing in your eyes. “There has to be another way.”
The High Lord’s features morph into a scowl. “Another way? My star, he is a bastard—”
“I love him!” 
That tightening in his chest finally snaps and Azriel’s breath catches. He feels that light in your eyes, perfectly reflecting the one in his. It sears into his soul, as fierce and unrelenting as the starlight glowing from your hands.
Your father doesn’t notice the shift in the air, the change in Azriel’s posture, in his chest. Or in yours.
“You think that means anything?” 
Azriel’s shadows whisper a warning into his ears, of an oncoming raging darkness. Different but similar to the High Lord’s. He barely hears his shadows, too focused on you, on the bond thrumming between you. His mind is consumed with you. 
Mate. Mate. Mate.
“You and mother—” you begin.
“Do you think your mother and I love each other?” The High Lord interrupts sharply, his voice cold and cutting. He breaks out into a laugh.
Azriel snaps out of his trance. Anger flares within him at the shock, the devastation that takes over your features. He watches as you shrink back slightly, his instincts roaring to protect you from any harm, whether verbal or otherwise. 
Because he’s your mate. Because he loves you.
 “You think I would marry your mother, a low born seamstress by choice? What your mother and I have is different. It’s complicated. A special bond.  One that gave me Rhysand and you and–”
A sound like thunder crashes through the room, reverberating off the stone walls as darkness swells in every corner. One moment, Azriel is on his knees. The next, he’s slamming into the cold marble floor, the force of Rhysand’s power pinning him down. Tendrils of Rhysand’s darkness coil around Azriel’s form, fighting with the shadows that instinctively rise to defend him.
“How long?” Rhysand's violet eyes blaze as they burn into Azriel.
“And I am beginning to think you both are nuisances to my existence rather than gifts...” The High Lord mutters followed by an exhausted sigh.
“How long have you been fucking my sister?” His words are a snarl as he slams Azriel harder into the floor, advancing toward him with clenched fists.
“Rhysand!” You let out a cry, rushing to the two males to separate them.
Your brother whips around, his anger igniting into something fiercer at the sight of you. “Stay out of this!” he snaps, his hand raising. He’s too angry, too heated. So much that he doesn't even notice the force of darkness he aims your way.
Rhysand’s magic hits you hard, knocking the breath from your lungs. A choked gasp escapes as you stumble backward, struggling to keep your footing. A burst of bright sapphire explodes from each of Azriel’s siphons, a deep and low growl rumbling from his chest. He breaks free from Rhysand’s magic, standing to his feet. His wings flare behind him, shadows swirling like a storm.
The look in his hazel eyes is nothing short of feral, dark and ancient, a fierce and possessive glint that makes Rhysand falter and surprise flash across the High Lord’s features.
You fall to the ground with a thud, palms scraping against the stone and pain flaring in your hands. Rhysand turns toward you, the anger that had been simmering in his violet gaze immediately dissolving into guilt and regret. “Y/n, I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t touch her.” Azriel growls, standing in between you and your brother, his shadows forming in an additional protective barrier. Some shadows flutter toward you, helping you stand and bringing you to Azriel’s side. Your hand instinctively seeks Azriel’s, fingers curling into his and you squeeze it, letting him know you’re alright. 
“By the Cauldron…” the High Lord’s voice comes out in a low murmur, his gaze darting between you and Azriel. His eyes narrow as he finally notices the subtle shift in the air, in your scents. The scent of a bond. 
“You two are mates,” he says, tone laced with resignation. Because even he, a High Lord, is not above going against The Cauldron.
It feels like a punch to the gut for Rhysand. His best friend and his sister. Fate’s inevitable design had been right under his nose all along. “What?” Rhysand breathes in shock, chest still heaving from the exertion of his magic.
Azriel’s hand tightens around yours. His gaze softens as he turns to you, the fierce protectiveness from earlier easing into something gentler. And when your eyes meet again, it’s there—the unmistakable light of the mating bond. It shines bright and steady between you. Just like your love for each other does.
 A light that never goes out.
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bonus scene
Once the shock of the bond had worn off, the High Lord excused himself, muttering about damage control. “Spring will be the hardest to deal with,” he had said.
Rhysand’s body tensed as his eyes found yours. But you’d only given him a small, reassuring smile. Though it is something you would like to talk about, his secret would remain safe with you.
Your father would soon announce the bond to the Court of Nightmares, already making plans for a grand mating ceremony. You’d much rather have something private, intimate. But a public celebration seemed like a small price to pay for the lifetime you’d get to spend beside the male you loved.
Rhysand turned his gaze back to Azriel, his expression still unreadable. “You never answered my question,” he said, voice calm but edged with something darker. “How long?”
Azriel hesitated before answering, unlike the way he had with the High Lord. This was his best friend standing in front of him. The one he grew up and trained along with, survived the brutality of the Blood Rite with. Rhysand was like a brother to him and he went behind his back for years.
 “A decade.”
“A decade?” Rhysand blinks in surprise. 
A whole decade of secrecy. Of Azriel sneaking around with his little sister. It all made sense now. Why Azriel became more reserved, more private. Why Azriel no longer indulged himself with the pleasures of the females at Rita’s or the Illyrian camps like he and Cassian did. Why you spent more time at the Moonstone palace, instead of the House of Wind, where you had grown up and been raised by a handful of Priestesses. It hadn’t been to learn about the politics of the courts but to be closer to Azriel.
And then, with no warning, Rhysand swings.
The hit lands squarely on Azriel’s jaw, so swift and unexpected that neither you nor Azriel’s shadows had seen it coming. Azriel takes the blow without protest, silently commanding his shadows to stand their ground and not fight back. 
“Rhys!” you snapped, your brows furrowing into a scowl. 
Rhysand huffs, shaking out his hand from the impact. “That’s for going behind my back,” he says. He pauses for a second and then, he lets out a low chuckle. Full of disbelief and relief.
“I’m still angry at both of you,” Rhysand admits, and Azriel lowers his head, bracing for more. “Not because it’s you—though I’ll admit, seeing you together is... strange. But because you kept it from me for so long, putting both of your lives at risk.”
Then Rhysand’s voice softens, his gaze following. “But I’m glad it’s you.”
Azriel lifts his head back up in surprise as Rhysand holds out his hand.
 “You’re a good male, Azriel. Better than most. And I know you’ll protect her. Love her in a way no one else can.”
Azriel stares at Rhysand’s outstretched hand before finally clasping it, the tension between them easing. Your chest warms at your brother’s sincerity.
The sound of footsteps, heavy and hurried, echo through the stone walls. They grow louder with each passing second and moments later, Cassian and Mor appear at the entrance of your father’s study. Cassian braces himself against the doorframe and Mor leans on him, their chests rising and falling rapidly.
It’s clear they’re winded from the endless stairs they must’ve taken to reach the floor of your father’s private study. It was located between the Court of Nightmares and Moonstone Palace, warded so that only those of his bloodline could winnow directly inside.
Their eyes dart between the three of you. 
“What did we miss?”
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a/n: hope you enjoyed! here’s a little HC (idk what to call it?) of Rhys’s sis & Az if you’re curious 💙
General tag list: @scooobies, @kennedy-brooke, @sillysillygoose444, @lilah-asteria @the-sweet-psycho
@daycourtofficial, @milswrites, @stormhearty, @pit-and-the-pen, @mybestfriendmademe
@loving-and-dreaming @azriels-human @mrsjna, @adventure-awaits13, @lorosette
fic tag: @noisyinfluencerstrawberry, @tothestarsandwhateverend, @tulipbite, @kylaisra, @stressed-reader
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suhkusa · 6 months ago
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A SECRET ALLIANCE - A HAIKYUU SMAU
pairing. sakusa kiyoomi x reader
smau warnings. college au!, angst, fluff, subjective/questionable humor, ooc probably, strangers-to-lovers, slight enemies-to-lovers (if you squint), some written content
status. COMPLETE!
synopsis. Your love life has never been too interesting— or good. But after downloading an app that allowed you to talk to strangers online, you find yourself entangled with anonymous user IMOAsukas. The catch? He’s part of your college’s volleyball team.
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INTRO.
1. THEWURLDISMINE
2. JANE THE VIRGIN
3. EMBARRASSING
4. GOOD NIGHT
5. HELP ME!!!
6. MISSION K.M.S
7. ABOUT TIME
8. #REAL
9. BREATHE [📝]
10. BIGGER (SAKUSA KIYOOMI)
11. LIKABLE PERSONALITY
12. SILLY GIRLY FANTASY
13. SICK AND TWISTED
14. SPOILER WARNING [📝]
15. SKY DADDY
16. COINCIDENCE
17. DICK APPOINTMENT
18. LIGHTLY SHAT
19. SEVERELY DRUNK
20. MESSY
21. CRASHING OUT [📝]
22. I’M MARRIED!!!!!! [📝]
23. HAPPY WIFE HAPPY LIFE
END.
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specific warnings will be specified each chapter
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© all writings belongs to suhkusa 2024. do not repost or change.
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animeyanderelover · 2 months ago
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chae yul again for this event if you dont mind? 🥺🙏 sorry I just wish he had more stuff lol;; also merry christmas!😊
Tw: Yandere themes, possessive behavior, obsession, delusional tendencies, clinginess, isolation
Tags: @iloveeyanderes
Quick Christmas Hc's
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💜​Christmas has never been something that Chae Yul has ever been much invested in, mainly because he has never gotten along that much with his own family. After all this is meant to be the time to celebrate the end of the year with your loved ones yet he has never had someone he loved and wanted to celebrate with. Then you came into his life and suddenly Chae Yul understands the appeal of a time like Christmas. Only if he gets to spend it all with you though. Especially during special holidays or celebrations is Chae Yul more clingy than ever as he wants to spend such annual events and share the happy moments only with you. Something that Chae Yul loves to gift you during the end of an year is a photo album all listing his favorite memories of the year forever captured in the pictures. He's written the date of the picture as well as the occasion of it in form of little notes all over the pages, hearts and multiple confessions of love all littered across the sides. Another gift that you receive this year is a large, oversized hoodie, probably because a lot of your clothes have gone missing during this year... again. Chae Yul can't wait to "borrow" your hoodie as soon as it is covered in your scent.
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dearyuls · 7 months ago
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#. > 0 | 1 | 2 <
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CHAPTER TWO.
> please read the prologue (0), for content warnings.
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Yul couldn't believe how well it went! He hadn't done anything strange or creepy and was able to sort out everything for the job, which he would be doing tomorrow – it was a little soon but, Yul wasn't going to turn down his first opportunity to make money, since he has no other ways anymore, but it was better that he didn't rely on his parents anymore, he didn't want anything to do with them. Plus, he didn't have anything better to do with his time, and when he had nothing to do, it was difficult for his mind to not end up wandering, and he couldn't just spend his time trying to sleep it off.
He'd pulled his hood back up, stuffing his hands into his pocket as he made his way home, he definitely deserved a smoke after holding it together like that.
He could hear the faint voices of people talking in front of him, but he paid it no attention, he didn't even look up, all he wanted to do was make sure he didn't end up talking to anyone.
His instincts to fight struck as soon as he felt somebody grab him, his hand balling into a fist, ready to push whoever it was away from him – until he looked down at the girl, and then the man she was with..had she just called him her boyfriend?
Being assumed as a man was nice for him, due to his facial features, most people assumed him to be a tomboy...it was a good feeling.
Yul evaluated what was going on for a second before deciding to go along with it, he knew firsthand how bad harassment could end up being, it would be nice if he could at least help, he didn't help strangers very much, he was ever so selfish, all of the time, but since you had pulled him in, he supposed he would do what he could.
...Damn, he was persistent, he didn't even give up after the girl grabbed him...he almost winced at how hard she was grabbing his arm...he thought she must be really scared....he remembered how he felt that time in school...he wasn't in a position to stand up for himself then, but he was now. It wasn't even about the girl for him.. it more felt like he was doing it for him in the past.
He only held the knife with him in the case anyone was to recognise him and bring any harm to him, and he knows that since he looks feminine, he is likely to be at the brunt of male harassment too...the latter was closer to the situation at hand, so, he was pretty lucky.
His eyes had darkened as he watched the man shrink back....oh, it felt good. He felt adrenaline.
After watching him walk away, he looked down at you for the first time, he hadn't even bothered to check who had grabbed him before deciding to step in, it wasn't as if he had any friends here, so he doubts checking who you were would've actually changed anything, and when he did. Fuck. He recognised you immediately.
You were that girl from before...in the photo he took.
You were grabbing onto him...so close to him.
He couldn't believe it; you had somehow found a way back to him...did this mean something? You had grabbed him, not somebody else...did that mean you thought he would be able to protect you? Did you think of him as more than a man than that scum?
Yul was getting too ahead of himself, he shook his head, he didn't know you, you were just some nice-looking girl he saw, and happened to bump into twice, there was no need for him to start thinking anything strange. You'd definitely just thank him and be on your way and never see him again. He wasn't even in the mindset to be interested in anyone again! He hadn't stopped thinking of Sian fully yet, and then on top of that he was completely unstable, he hadn't changed at all, despite trying his best.
He was stuck in a tangent in his head before you started to speak, he'd never heard your voice the first time but... he thought it was cute, you were apologising to him. It had been quite a while since he'd heard an apology from anybody, he didn't feel like he deserved one, even if you had cause him any bother, stopping someone from being possibly assaulted wasn't something he would've actively avoided.
You'd even invited him to your work so casually...you didn't even know who he was...so why were you doing that...had you really felt so bad about it? He was no better than that man for what he'd done in the past, he didn't deserve to be treated so kindly.
He was unsure what came over him when he offered to walk you home, why would you let some strange man that you didn't know do that? He remembers distantly in the past he specifically stated not to do so... to make it even worse he stumbled on his words in the worst way possible, and he said it so casually as well.
He seriously wanted to drop dead in that moment.
He had no problems with stalking in the past, it was rather normal to him, but he wasn't a stalker anymore, he didn't want you to go thinking he was one then somehow figuring out who he was! He needed to fix his mistake... you probably thought he was a weirdo now! He panicked internally, this was the one thing he didn't want to do, this is why he avoided people, he knew something like this would end up happening—
As soon as he scrambled out an apology for what he said, you.... Laughed?
You hadn't found fault in what he'd said, you weren't stepping away in fear.. he was surprised, really surprised.
His eyes were wide as he stared at your face, just listening to you.
You had a really warm laugh, it felt welcoming and soft.
He wasn't really even sure what you said afterwards, he hadn't fully been paying attention, he felt like he had been put into a trance, by a siren or something of the sorts, and before he could recognise it, you were already walking away from him, and all he could do was stare at your back, until he could no longer see you.
Yul didn't follow you; he was kind of tempted, only to make sure you made it home safe of course, he had no ulterior motives...but. He had something more important to take care of.
Yul walked down the path going the opposite direction to you, fast and quiet, he didn't want attention to be drawn to him..and he didn't want to get himself caught.
In complete silence, he caught up to that creep from before, but instead of making himself known, he just stayed following him, a few paces away, nobody else was out in the area, so it wasn't like someone would bring alert to him.
After a few minutes, Yul finally saw his opportunity, he smirked, watching the man turn to walk down a barely lit alleyway, away from the public eye, Yul increased the volume of his footfall, wanting his presence to be made aware of.
The creep turned around, his movements were rough, and he looked down at Yul, who was glaring up at him, his pupils dilated.
He stepped away; Yul stepped closer.
" Did you really think I'd let scum like you get away ,huh? " His voice was deeper than when he had first spoken, he was now trying to be scary, or pose as some kind of threat. It didn't seem to bother the guy though.
" I left your girl alone man, whaddya want from me? " He had a sour expression on his face, and was clearly hostile. Was he stupid? Yul had already heard him threaten that he wasn't done with you, he didn't want this man to bring harm to such a warm person...something in him couldn't allow that...Sian used to be warm. Then she turned cold. It was all that assholes fault.
This creep reminded Yul of him...his mouth twisted into a deranged smile; he couldn't control the raging emotions inside of him. Scum like this shouldn't even be allowed to live--- you didn't even like this man, he had the full right to do whatever he pleased!
" You were going to do something to her right? " Yul chuckled, pulling the taser out from his back pocket, and within seconds, the man was writhing on the floor. Yul walked over him, looking down at him with his legs on either side.
Hm? The man hadn't passed out, but he wasn't' moving very much..perhaps the voltage hadn't been raised high enough. Whatever...more fun for him at least.
" You fucking—" Yul kicked the man in the face, blood dripping out from him nose.
" Go on, finish what you were gonna say. " He glared at him, his voice taunting as he stayed stood over him, he wasn't going to purposefully get closer to this man than necessary, He couldn't explain why there was so much anger flooding through him, it felt like his blood was passing through his body in raging tidal waves and he couldn't stop it from overflowing.
He kicked the man again, this time his stomach, making him keel over, grabbing at the now bruised skin to protect it.
Yul could just keep beating the guy up..but he didn't want this stain on the earth any longer...all people like this shouldn't be given the gift of existing, Yul was a firm believer in that fact, he would just be doing everybody a favour by doing this..not just you.
If only he hadn't cared what she thought of him...he would've been able to kill that bastard before, but, at least he could take his anger out on this creep.
He put his taser away and slid the knife back out from the inside of his sleeve, grabbing the handle and spinning the knife around in his hand.
Yul's eyes quickly focused on how the mans throat tensed up as his mouth opened..he was about to scream..! Yul couldn't have himself being caught, he needed to do this and run.
Before he could think Yul's foot was smashed down onto his throat, restricting his flow of air, making sure he wasn't caught.
He put his weight down on him, hearing a gargled choke for air come from him, he moved his foot around a bit to torment him, crushing his windpipe.
" Don't think you'll get saved so quickly--- did any women ever get the chance to scream when you got your hands on them, freak? " Yul patronised him; he didn't know whether his accusations were actually on the point or not but, he didn't care, there was no way he just randomly woke up like this, Yul was justified! It was okay for him to do this.
" I'm going to kill you. " He stated, stepping away from the mans throat, hearing rushed intakes of air... Yul missed the feeling he got when he was in control of someone's life...such a dark, bloodied feeling...but it made him feel so good..! he could go insane! The thrill of it, it just made him so excited!
He had just taken a big step back from his progress, but he didn't even care. He wasn't getting far anyway...these feelings are okay once in a while, right? He can't just completely let himself be depraved of it.
His grin intensified, his eyes drilling holes into the man as he dropped to his knees on top of him, stabbing the knife in and out of him mercilessly.
He'd needed this...ever since that day..he needed this!
He laughed to himself, cruelly, as he drove the knife into the man's chest, blood splattering all over him, he didn't care, this wasn't his favourite outfit anyway, he could just incinerate it.
He didn't just stop there, he stabbed the man in the abdomen, multiple times, then in his throat, just to make sure he was definitely dead, and without thinking he scooped the mans eyes out, they were already closed, he had definitely died quickly with how many vitals Yul had stabbed, there weren't even any tears streaming down his face like a most people have when they feel pain.
It was a bit of a struggle pulling them out since they were pretty well connected, but he managed to do it anyway, he had probably seen so many nasty things with those eyes, even in death he didn't deserve to keep them.
Yul stood back up now, admiring the deceased body, that he'd just killed, he didn't even remember stabbing him that many times...but, he was scum. He deserved it.
Yul wiped the smudge of blood on his cheek on his sleeve, he was lucky he was wearing black, and that it had grown dark, so nobody would be out, and nobody would be checking down this alley anytime soon, he pulled his hood which had fallen down back up over his head to disguise himself and he walked back home, like nothing had even happened – he didn't feel bad at all for what he'd just done, he was just imagining the man was blonde, and that he had long hair, and it felt so good to finally get that out, better than any stupid therapy session he'd tried to go to.
His urges needed to be satisfied, and if he didn't have any love to obsess over, violence would certainly do the trick as well.
On your walk home, you'd called Iseul, she was very worried about you and insisted on keeping the call going even an hour after you'd arrived home, you'd locked the door, locked your windows, and made sure you kept a baseball bat next to your bed in case you needed to attack when you woke up – perhaps you were overly worried about the situation, but better safe than sorry!
You'd told your boss as well, and he'd sent you a few messages in concern.
Shin
Are you doing okay, did anything happen to you?
Shin
You can take the day off tomorrow if you're not feeling safe to go outside.
Shin
Would you like me to come over to your house?
You replied to him letting him know you were okay with coming in tomorrow, you were okay, and that he didn't need to waste his time coming over, he'd have to be up early the next day, so you didn't want to waste any of his time, when, you felt weirdly safe. Although he was often dry when he messaged you, he really did care for you, he got like this whenever you were sick as well – you were grateful that you had a boss that was so nice, even though you reassured him you were certain he would stay up worrying about it, that's just the kind of person he was, the kind of person anyone would be lucky to have in their life you thought.
Thinking of that creep, you couldn't believe that had really happened, you weren't one to draw attention to yourself, but you still managed to have a creep loitering after you.. what horrible people. You were so glad that you'd found a sweet guy to protect you...he did look sort of shaken up after what happened, he was staring at you, he must've been scared, you thought, you really did feel bad for the guy...Yul wasn't it? What a nice name.
You hoped he'd stop by your work so you could thank him properly, you were still terrified, so you couldn't properly show your gratitude in the moment..,which was understandable, but still! It didn't feel right, especially when he'd instilled such a safe feeling inside of you, talking to him had made you almost forgot what had just happened, he was soothing. You really wanted to see him again. He was pretty cute when he messed up his wordings and his face got all red. You snickered to yourself as you thought about that turn of events.
Returning home, all you really wanted to do was sleep, you were too stressed to stay up and watch a show you liked, you knew every sound you heard around you would make you paranoid, so the best thing you could do would be to try and sleep it off, you didn't think that man would end up following you home after he'd already walked so far in the opposite direction, and you were pretty sure your apartment had CCTV as well, you'd be alright..
You hugged one of the plushies on your bed close to your chest, pretending it was a real person as you managed to drift off to sleep.
Tomorrow would be another long day you supposed.
--
Upon your arrival at work today, you almost died of shock, Shin ran over and hugged you, when you came in, asking if you were sure you were in condition to work and patting you down to see if you were alright and if you had any injuries you hadn't told him about. – even if you did have some it wasn't necessarily his business, you thought.
" I'm telling you I'm okay! Seriously don't worry about it! " You tried to calm him down, he wasn't a very affectionate man, so it was kind of strange feeling his arms around you, his hair kind of tickled when it hit your skin, you were jealous of how much of it he had.
" As your boss, I should've been able to de-escalate the situation for you, next time something like this happens, I won't let it stand. " He pulled back from the hug, holding your shoulders tightly as he looked into your eyes, with his usual serious gaze.
You smiled. " Thanks for the concern, really. " You spoke quietly, gratitude seeping through, you did appreciate his kindness.
" You're my friend, obviously I'd be concerned. " He replied, still holding you by your shoulders, you lightly pushed him off, he really wasn't a touchy person, so it just felt strange. Even stranger he referred to you as a friend, he wasn't really one to point out such relationships either.. he really did turn soft when he was worried.
" Now, get back to the kitchen, I think I smell burning. " You found sincere moments grew awkward when you let them linger for too long, so you broke the mood with a joke, not wanting him to start telling you how he planned to protect you whilst you were trying to setup the bakery.
" Say anything more and I'll start thinking you're the boss. " He took the hint, jostling back with you.
Today was full of surprises it seems; he was never really a joker.
" Please call me if anyone bothers you today. " You nodded, and he went back to his work in the kitchen..something in there smelt really good today, you'd have to try and figure out what it was.
Then, Iseul rushed in, practically mirroring Shins movements with you...too many hugs today for your liking.
" Are you suuure you're still free tonight? I don't wanna push you past your limits if you don't feel safe going with me! I mean, I'd like, totally understand if you'd rather stay at home after such a traumatic night! " She spoke frantically, worry was evident in her words as she looked you up and down, like you were about to just drop dead infront of her.
" Why is everybody so worried..? I'm okay Ise, If you're still free then I'm still free. " You smiled at her, but, she her face hadn't changed.
" Seriously. " You added on in the most honest tone you could muster.
" Okay..but, if you ever feel uncomfortable at any point, we can go home! " She persisted and you nodded, with a sigh.
People showing so much care for you made you pretty uncomfortable if you were honest, you just kind of expected to go through your life without concerning anyone, and somehow you had managed to worm your way into their hearts without even trying, you had no idea how you did it.
She then proceeded to tell you about her own evening after you hung up the call and how she couldn't sleep because she was so worried she just had to see you and make sure you were actually fine – it was kind of endearing to watch her ramble about you, but, again you felt bad about invoking such things, like maybe her day would've been better if she didn't know you at all..people can be so stressful and confusing sometimes.
Afterwards she ran to the kitchen, and you could kind of overhear her talking to Shin, but you weren't sure what about, you couldn't hear them properly, with the most of your attention being about, well, doing your job.
Tuning people out of your head was something you often did growing up; it was an easy skill for you now. .
Standing behind the counter, of the now opened bakery, you tapped at the counter, waiting for customers to come in, and praying to yourself nothing bad would happen this time, you still wondered if that guy would be coming back..perhaps he'd just ignore your invite, you probably wouldn't go to some random girls work if she invited you there either, but it's not often you speak to unknown people to begin with.
Thankfully, halfway through your shift nothing bad had happened yet, you were on your lunch break, sitting in the lounge room with all the other employees, the shop temporarily shut.
You were eating some of the snacks you'd brought in your bag, eating actual food in front of people was something else you weren't a huge fan of, so you just stuck to small things which wouldn't take too long, you were quiet, and so was Iseul, who was sat next to you, until you heard a loud gasp from her, looking over, she shoved her phone in your face..at maximum brightness as well. Squinting, your eyes adjusted to the bright screen as you took in what she was showing you.
A dead body had been found this morning by a local jogger – in some random alley, apparently it had been brutal....could that have been you? Your eyes widened slightly, if you had been forced to go anywhere with him...was that what he planned to do to you? Was he still out there waiting for you? You may have been uncaring about many things but, that didn't mean you just wanted to die like this.
" Can you believe it? That's only like ten minutes away from here! That's suuper scary don't you think?? " Her voice was loud, and picked up the attention of your other co-workers.
" Yeah..I saw the victim was a guy, a big one as well, that's even worse...can you imagine how strong the person who killed him must've been? " a girl from the other side of the room gossiped back with her, and Iseul replied back, leaning forward, with interest.
Oh? Wait what if...? No, no, the man who saved you wasn't really defined as big you wouldn't think..but, if it was the creep then, you could possibly see him waiting and killing Yul since he couldn't have you...and your heart was racing..you didn't want to be the reason some sweet guy died! That would be on your conscience forever!
" They don't even know anything about the killer, other than they were wearing black! They aren't sure whether it's a guy or a girl... " ....that means it couldn't have been the creep. He wasn't wearing black....You were still concerned but, at least that meant your involvement was minimal.
The conversation continued, and you lost track of it, despite Iseul originally starting it with you, you weren't really a big fan of gossiping, so you just sunk down into your seat and pretended like you weren't there.
The conversation continued until Shin coughed, saying that maybe it wasn't an appropriate thing to talk about at the workplace, and so everyone and so you fell into silence.
At the end of your shift, you walked out of the doors with Iseuls arm draped around your shoulder.
" I'll come pick you up in two hours, so get ready! But if you change your mind about it at any point, tell me! I seriously won't be upset at you, I promise! "
She reassured you again, to which you told her you were definitely okay – it was good to go out once in a while, and since it would be your day off tomorrow, with it being a Sunday, it didn't matter if you slept in really late due to tiredness.
You made it home without a hitch, nothing bad had came your way this time, so you considered yourself lucky again, and now you needed to get out of work mode, and get into hanging out mode.
You kept the same outfit on, you weren't even sure where you'd be going, so you didn't see it fit to change, when your outfit was already cute enough, and you didn't want to go outside reeking of pizazz.
The time passed without you even realising it, you couldn't really recall what you'd been up to before hearing the ringing of your doorbell, and you walked over to answer it.
Your friend stood there, with her hair pinned up into two ponytails, it was a nice dark red, kind of like blood—a bit of a weird comparison, but you couldn't name many red things, and inside of the ponytails were braids, it was a pretty style on her..you'd kept yours down, because keeping it up just ends up being annoying, and it takes effort to actually style it, and you didn't really care about the gaze of other people enough to try and appear better to them.
She wore a one-piece black dress, with a leopard print jacket over it, she also wore heels to make herself taller, which she didn't even really need, she was already 5'6,
" You didn't even dress up! Ahh you're sooo borinnggg!" She complained, stomping her feet a little, like a child, you laughed dryly. " Well, you never said what we're doing...and, you know I don't like to dress up, unless it's alone in my room, to myself. " You replied, stepping out of your house and locking the door...you were pretty sure you locked the windows as well; you hoped you did.
Guilt was hard to ignore when it felt so present, you enjoyed spending time with her, and, it was nice that you had a work friend who actually wanted to hang out with you when the two of you were out of work, but, you were already thinking about coming back home and going to bed, that probably meant you were a bad friend...but you didn't mind.
" Didn't I? Weelll...You're really gonna stick out dressed like that..we're going to party girl! " She grabbed you by the hand and started to walk with you, and you walked slightly behind her, judging by her attire you'd be going to a bar or a club...ugh.
..Maybe ugh was a bit too judgmental, you hadn't actually been to one before, so you shouldn't act so snobbish about it, although you were pretty certain it wasn't your type of scene.
" Y'know, you always seem so lonely, I wanna make you some friends! Orrrr something more if you're lucky! " You grimaced as Iseul looked back at you laughed..you definitely weren't going to enjoy this night out...you could just hope it wouldn't be awful,
" I don't really need any of that though..I'm happy with how my life is now, lonely and
all. " , it seemed like she just couldn't understand that the quiet life was ideal for some people, like you.
" Your only friends are me and your boss! Come onnn try and socialise juuust once...for me? " You hated that she was talking to you like she was talking to a toddler, but you bit your lip and focused out, listening to the clacking of her heels on the floor as she dragged you by the hand, you noticed she now had some bright red fake nails on her, they were nice, they suited her personality, vibrant and in your face.
The music violated your ears as you closed in on where Iseul had taken you...great. A crowded club full of drunk people, just where you wanted to go after a long day of work.....you knew that Iseul frequented places like this, but she usually invited other friends, seeing her post about it on social media, you rarely posted yourself, but if you did it was because you saw a cute cat on the street or saw a pretty looking cloud or something stupid like that. This was the first time she'd invited you to with her.
You thought the two of you may have looked like a couple, with you gripping at her hand harder, you hadn't realised how nervous you were, gritting your teeth as you could hear her talking to some guy outside, and then the two of you walked inside, yet again you hadn't been paying well enough attention to what was going on, too busy trying to convince yourself that the time would pass quickly and that you wouldn't end up dying here...
" I'm gonna go grab us drinks! " Iseul turned to you, yelling at you over the music, and you covered your eyes, nodding, staying on the spot as your watched as your friend was able to weave in and out of the crowds with ease, as you stood motionless, not even moving to the music.
People bashed into you and stepped on your feet, and you just stood and stumbled and tried to get yourself out of the way of the people in the room with you, your eyes scanned the room as you looked for her, but, you had no idea where she was getting drinks from, or how long she'd take, so for now you were alone.
Clutching the strap of your bag tightly as a support helped give you something to focus on, it felt like your senses were being assaulted, there was a reason you didn't come here.
Five minutes had passed, and Iseul hadn't came back yet, you'd started to look around for her, mumbling quiet " Excuse Me"s to people as you sifted through them, and now you couldn't see where you'd came in from which made you even more stressed! Your palms were growing clammy, and you could feel every strand of your hair and hear every single breath you took – it was getting uncomfortable alright, but now you couldn't tell your friend you wanted to leave, since she'd seemingly disappeared somewhere.
The music seemed to grow louder the longer you were there, voices merged into each other as people were yelling across the club, all of them were dressed the same, you were really sticking out, this was the antithesis of a good time for you.
It felt as if the room was spinning around you, as the loud pop song felt like it was making the floors vibrate, or maybe they were vibrating? You weren't sure. At least you'd worn basic trainers so it was easier for you to walk around...your aim was to find a bathroom and go and text Iseul, but, the flashing lights around you made it impossible for you to see if there was a sign for the bathroom, and, walking in and out of people didn't seem like the best idea, especially when it felt like your chest was closing in on itself, you really wanted her to come back, it was becoming suffocating inside. The room just seemed to get smaller, and denser, it felt like everyone inside was purposefully intruding your personal space...you were pretty sure somebody just grabbed your arm, you yanked it away and kept looking, there was still no sign of her..
A couple more minutes passed and now you were getting anxious. What if something had happened to her and you were here panicking about yourself?
You had to try and look for her more...you walked around, eyes darting in every direction, compared to you, sure she stood out, but in a room full of people the exact same...it was too hard. You didn't like it.
You'd only came to this place because she told you to, and then she has the nerve to leave you on your own...how terrible...next time she asked you out you'd definitely tell her you were sick, as payback.
A headache was starting to come up, and you reached a hand up to hold your head, looking around, you swore everyone in the room was staring at you, they had to be, you were hyperventilating... you needed to get outside so badly, you were pushed and shoved around as you were trying to find anywhere that wasn't here to go and try to recollect yourself, hands were over you, or maybe you were imagining it... looking around again you finally found some form of security, there was a set of stairs, there had to be less people upstairs right?
Without a second thought you ran up the stairs, it really felt like you were about to pass out, you didn't feel right at all...had someone drugged you without you realising, even though you didn't drink anything yet since Iseul hadn't come back..what If there was a new way of drugging that you didn't know about! Anxiety filled you as you stumbled up the stairs, holding onto the handrail. There were a few people upstairs but far less, since the music was quieter and there was no atmosphere...you could presume everybody huddled up here were people like you who were dragged along by their friends.
Up here there was a lot of seating, where people could just sit and drink, and a restroom, as well as a large balcony. You figured that was your best shot, some fresh air was really needed, especially knowing you'd have to brave the downstairs area again in order to get out..unless you could jump off of the balcony! You weren't too fond of breaking your own legs though...so that was probably out of the question for you.
Shakily walking out onto the balcony, you took a seat on the floor, there weren't any seats out here...you guessed people just came to smoke and then leave.
You pulled your knees up to your chest, inhaling the best as your could as you tried to calm your hammering heartbeat down, you could hear it so loudly in your ears, you really wished you hadn't came. You could've been at home right now....This was the worst experience of your life...at least yesterday it was over quickly, it felt like you'd been here for hours upon hours.
Taking your phone out of your bag, you texted Iseul, asking where she was, if she was okay, and if she could meet you up on the balcony, you gave it a few minutes, and after getting no reply you called her, you were desperate to reach her.
You let the phone keep ringing, but she didn't pick up, meaning you had been left completely alone. You sent another text, telling her to call you as soon as she looked at her phone, you then put it away, just in case you ended up putting it down and then forgetting about it.
Had it started to rain..? You felt a wetness staining your knees. Looking upwards you saw no clouds in the sky, just a plethora of stars, so many that it made you feel lonelier, ah, you had been crying.
--
Yul was glad that he had so many repeats of the same black hoodie, or he'd be screwed, he'd fully cleaned the other one, and disposed of it, and he was wearing the exact same outfit again, although, he kind of regretted it...it was really hot in here with how many people there were, he was allowed to stand in areas blocked off to normal people though, so, bonus for him. His hood was down, and his hair was fully out, since he wouldn't be able to see properly if he didn't.
He'd taken quite a few photos by that point, and people were ignoring his presence there, he didn't like the type of women who wasted all their time in clubs though, so it's not like that bothered him at all.
His shutter clicked as he took a photo the moment the club lighting changed at the chorus of a new song, and it was a pretty sick picture, at least to him, he checked it out as he gazed into his camera. Everyone looked so good, this would definitely get the club a better reputation if they were showing pictures like this! He was glad he decided to take on the job, it seems maybe he did have an actual talent, who would've guessed, seeing the pathetic loser he was before.
Wait...was that? His eyes narrowed, bringing the camera closer to his face, zooming in on the picture as much as he could, he couldn't quite make out the facial features but..he was sure that was...you in the background. That same girl from yesterday..! Now he had two photos...with you in them. Lucky him.
He bit his lip after thinking that, that was a bit too creepy.
What were you even doing here? In that outfit as well...Had you came here by accident? He laughed to himself at the thought, he didn't let his questions linger before he continued to work, he wasn't getting paid to be a detective, afterall.
Looking through the camera roll, he was certain he had enough photos for the club owner to be happy with...he needed a break.
He knew there was no smoking inside of the club, but he figured there'd have to be somewhere outside he could go. He placed another hand on his camera to steady it, and to make sure that nobody smashed it up on accident doing a wild dance move, God. Everybody here looks insufferable. If he was trash, what must these people be?
Walking up the stairs, he saw a sign saying smoking was permitted there, and he quickly went towards it, this was so deserved after all of his hard work! Maybe if he'd started to work before, he'd have a better feeling when he smoked instead of a dull emptiness.
Upon first glance he didn't see that anybody was there, so he pulled out a cigarette, and then his lighter, leaning himself against the railing by his arms, looking up at the clear sky, it was a beautiful night outside, when you weren't stuck in a stupid, stuffy building surrounded by drunk people.
His purple hair was blowing in his face every now and then, he shook his head to move it back into place,
...Odd. He felt odd. Was somebody watching him? His gaze darkened, it was a good thing he had his taser on hand...what if it was the police? What if they'd somehow figured him out? His body tensed, he turned around a fraction in the direction he could feel the eyes from, using his peripheral to just check what sort of threat he'd have to be dealing with, acting like he wasn't actively looking would do him better, as it made him look less suspicious.
There was nobody in the direct corridor behind him... it was clear...his eyes were drawn down, where two wide eyes were staring up at him.
He jumped, almost dropping the cigarette as he realised you were there " Fucking hell-" he cursed, turning fully to face you, before he actually saw who you were... what a strange series of coincidences.. it really was you from before.
Wait were you...crying? He tilted his head, not wanting to get any closer to you, he'd only ever been close to one girl before and well...he didn't want to evade your boundaries. He thought you must still be upset about what happened yesterday...he would tell you what he did but, he didn't want to end up scaring you even more.
" Hey..." His voice was softer than before, he put his cigarette out and squished it beneath his foot, as he crouched down infront of you. " You're the girl from yesterday right? " He repeated your name, and you nodded with a sniffle. " Are you okay? Why're you out here alone? " He wanted to reach out and wipe your tears, but...you sort of looked good with teary eyes.
You hadn't replied, and he sat down on the floor with you now. He wasn't sure what compelled him to do it, he didn't know you, or anything about you, you weren't even his friend, you were just some girl he kept running into, who gave him a really warm feeling. You meant nothing to him. He shouldn't try to get any closer to you than necessary.
Perhaps he felt bad for never being able to comfort Sian when she needed it, so he was trying to makeup for it, he was just being selfish, and doing this for himself, He couldn't care for another person who isn't her. He knows he can't, that's just who he is. He wasn't just feeling drawn in by the way you were looking at him...that just had to be something else.
" My friend...dragged me here and then abandoned me..." You spoke meekly, and Yul looked over to you, he had a tired look on his face, it didn't look like he particularly wanted to be here either.
" I got overwhelmed so..I came up here...and now I can't bring myself to go back downstairs.." Your voice was more of a mumble now, but he had trained his hearing to be sharp, given what he'd done...he needed to make sure he was able to hear anything, so it wasn't an issue for him.
" So, you didn't want to be here? " He asked, and you shook your head, he wasn't sure how he managed to come outside and not see you for so long, he felt a little stupid.
You were clutching onto your legs, you really didn't look like you wanted to come up here. " Bad things keep happening to you, I guess. " He couldn't help but laugh in your face, he felt a little remorse after you looked away from him, but he couldn't think of anything more comforting to say, and he didn't want to somehow make things worse by saying something unhelpful.
" Maybe its you...bad things only seem to happen to me when I bump into you, Yul. Which is seeming to be a recurring issue lately.." You joked back with him, he hadn't expected you to do that...he was a little surprised. His name.. You had remembered his name... That was sweet of you. You seemed so nice, how had someone looked at you and decided to take you here.. were they trying to torture you or something?
" You should try avoiding me then. " He looked back up at the stars, not noticing that you'd stopped crying now, maybe if he did he would've made a comment about it.
" Not until you come to the bakery. I need to repay you for yesterday, you really did help me a lot.i—I was really grateful for that. I just didn't know how to word it, I'm not good at talking in general. " The tone you were speaking in was so soft and gentle, he couldn't remember the last time anybody had been so kind to him. Were you this nice to all strangers you met?
" You really want me to come that bad? Well, I'll see if I'm free sometime next week, don't start expecting anything out of me though. You don't even need to thank me for what I did, I'm sure anyone would have. " He wasn't sure why you wanted to see him so badly, he didn't want to end up getting closer to you, he couldn't get close to...others.
He had already thought of you a few times on his own, he didn't want to start being like that again.
" But, You were the one who did it. I want to show my gratitude. " You weren't giving up were you? He sighed, supposing one trip to see you wouldn't do anything too bad to him, he had already memorised the name of the place you'd told him to go to, for no particular reason of curse.
" Fine, Fine. I'll be there, I guess. " He decided that he'd been outside for long enough and so he stood up, but, he felt a sensation on his lower leg.
You had reached out to grab his leg, only with two fingers, pinching the fabric of his jeans. "...wait." He stood and waited, looking down at you.
" Sorry to keep asking you for things but...could you help me get out of here please? I really can't find my friend and I get too overwhelmed on my own—I mean it's okay if you don't want to I can just stay out here but-"
He cut you off, grabbing you by the arm and pulling you up to your feet.
" You just wanna go home right? I'll help you out. " His other hand returned to his camera as he held your wrist tightly...he had quite a grip.
He started to walk back inside, pulling you behind him, he figured this was the best way to make sure you weren't separated, he didn't stop to lookback at you, just focusing on remembering his way out, he didn't want you to have to stay there any longer when you looked so sad, especially given how nice you could be despite it.
His grip was bruising, he sometimes was unaware of his strength, yet you didn't complain or ask him to let up. He thought that your skin was soft, and nice to the touch, he'd appreciate it whilst it lasted, since he didn't plan on having to make contact with you again. He'd already grown too close to you in your short moment outside, he was kind of glad you were doing bad and weren't able to keep a longer conversation, it was better for him that your interactions remain short.
Getting downstairs he could feel you gripping his wrist back, your fingers digging into his skin, he really could tell you weren't comfortable here.
Guiding you through the crowd, he finally managed to get you outside, letting go of you once you were across the street from the club.
" Thank you so much again , Yul! I'm sorry for bringing so much burden onto you. " You apologised to him again..you sure did like to apologise. He wasn't really used to hearing such words, it was kind of a shock to him. He wasn't completely hating it, though.
" Really, it's nothing, all I did was walk you outside. "
" I think you did a little more than that for me, but, thank you. " Why did you sound so warm all of the time? He didn't deserve to be spoken to like that. " I'll be getting home now..I know the way don't worry! Thank you again. "
Yul didn't say a word in return as he watched you walk away again, this was exactly like yesterday. He still wasn't sure why you had been pushed to him twice but, this had probably just been a coincidence.
His purple eyes bore into you again, watching your figure get further away.
Making sure you got home safely wouldn't hurt...right?
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sansaorgana · 7 months ago
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— LADY OF THE ROSES (I)
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PART TWO || PART THREE || PART FOUR
PAIRING — Ser Gwayne Hightower x fem!Reader // Tyrell!OC
SUMMARY — When Lord Tyrell organizes a huge tournament, the rumour has it that the winner might get his eldest daughter's hand in marriage. When she finds out that certain twins are not playing fair and are scheming together with her father to win, she finds herself a champion she wants to succeed instead – Ser Gwayne Hightower, who was sent by his father to win the tournament.
AUTHOR’S NOTE — It’s written as an usual x Reader fic without describing anything about the Reader’s looks but I still classified it as an OC as well since she is a Tyrell. Although I am not sure if we have even seen them in House of The Dragon, so they can literally look like anything...? 🤔 Thank you so much for reading my last fic with Gwayne and leaving lovely comments and messages! 🌹 It inspired me to write for him again and I already have more ideas for him and a Tyrell Lady Wife (although I don't think the fics will be connected, so they can be read separately). For some reason it makes SO MUCH SENSE to me for Gwayne to have a wife from Highgarden! Some sexual things are mentioned here but there is no actual smut, so I didn't put the warnings. 😉
WORD COUNT — 5,040
ENGLISH IS MY SECOND LANGUAGE.
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LADY OF THE ROSES (I)
Beautiful courtyards of Highgarden were filled with tents and knights. The sound of horses and clinging armour reached your ears as you were taking a stroll between the tents – against your father’s wish. He didn’t want you to walk freely around all those knights but you had your own guards and your curiosity had no match because you knew perfectly well what that expensive and flashy tournament was about.
You were in the right age to marry – some would say the age was more than right, too right even. You were Lord Tyrell’s eldest daughter and out of all the three sisters, you were the only one who still remained unmarried. The reasons behind that were two. First of all, you were a picky and proud Lady. Second of all, you didn’t want to leave Highgarden and The Reach.
Your father hoped that your marriage would create a powerful alliance and as a daughter of The Lord Paramount of the Reach and The Warden of the South, you were quite a catch for your suitors. Walking amongst them, you saw them turning around and staring at you with smirks. You were the only Lady around and your pale green dress was showing off just enough of your virtues in a typical Highgarden fashion. There were golden roses in your hair and golden eyeshadow on your eyelids as you were all dolled up for the first day of the tournament.
You took a turn around the Lannister tent and you hissed at the sight of your father. Thankfully, he was not looking in your direction and you managed to hide behind your guards but you ordered them to stand still. You wondered why your father was even by the Lannister tent. Talking so openly to one of the knights participating in the tournament was a clear favouritism.
“Thank you, Lord Tyrell, your support means a lot,” Lord Lannister said and you tried to see him better from between your guards’ shoulders. You didn’t like him at all since arrogance was written all over his face.
“It is no secret for all the men here that I would like you to win. It is a formality,” your father lowered his voice. “An alliance between such big houses… It would make us both stronger,” he put his arm around The Lannister. “But I liked the idea of the tournament. It has splendour, don’t you think? I like to show off,” you father grinned.
“As I said before, I am no knight. My younger twin brother is,” Lord Lannister said and your father looked around before shushing him and they both entered the tent.
Curiously, with furrowed brow, you peeked inside the tent despite your guards’ protests. And you nearly gasped at the sight of another man inside who was being prepared for the tournament as a squire was putting his armour on. He looked identical to the man your father was talking to.
“My brother, Ser Tyland, will pretend to be me during the tournament. No one will know,” Lord Lannister told your father and your father nodded at that. “I will sit and watch, pretending to be him. I will be criticising his techniques out loud just like a real knight would criticise his foolish brother who takes part in a tournament without being a knight,” he explained, very proud of himself.
He wouldn’t be the only man who wanted to take part in this tournament without the title of the knight. After all, everyone was aware that the prize was your hand in marriage and you didn’t necessarily need a knight. There were lots of common Lords joining the tournament but they were all honest with their intentions. Not only Lord Jason Lannister had your father’s favouritism but he also was planning to obviously cheat by using his brother.
It made you angry as you carefully took a step back and nodded at your guards to follow you down the path. It seemed like the whole tournament was just a show and a theatre play – you were no longer excited since the end result seemed to be fixed. You would be sent to Lannisport to marry that annoying and arrogant Lord Jason Lannister. Tears filled your eyes and you didn’t even care about your makeup anymore since you no longer longed for the tournament to begin.
You walked past the greenest tent around and saw a man in auburn hair washing his face outside. He noticed your staring and looked up with a dashing smile. He recognised you immediately from the portraits and your clothes. Also, what other Lady would dare to take a walk here? Only the one for whom the tournament was taking place.
“Lady Tyrell,” he bowed his head but his blue eyes were still on you.
You sniffled your tears back and straightened yourself.
“Lord…?” You asked and turned your head to see the banner on the tent. “Lord Hightower? No, that cannot be. Lord Hightower is in King’s Landing, is he not? And he is much older. He is The Hand of The King Viserys,” you tilted your head a little.
“You mean Otto Hightower, my Lady,” the man nodded with a smile as he approached you. His armour wasn’t fully on yet and you could see his shirt slightly open. “I am his eldest son, Ser Gwayne Hightower,” he introduced himself and reached his hand out.
After a while of hesitation, you allowed him to kiss the palm of your hand.
“Ser Gwayne Hightower. You are a brother to our Queen Alicent! Are you to inherit Oldtown after your father’s death?” You asked.
“That is correct, My Lady,” he nodded and straightened his back.
You hummed to yourself. Oldtown was in The Reach and it was the second largest and most populated city in the Seven Kingdoms. To get there from Highgarden, a horse needed around ten days down the Roseroad. You had been there before a few times with your parents but you had never met Ser Gwayne before. 
You looked him up and down. He had a cocky grin on his face but there was something about him that you actually quite liked – especially compared to Lord Jason Lannister. Ser Gwayne seemed to be confident but in a different, less exasperating way.
“Did your father encourage you to take part in this tournament, Ser Gwayne?” You asked him as you raised an eyebrow at him. “I do believe he is known for being an ambitious man.”
“Yes, my father insisted on me taking part,” Ser Gwayne admitted. “But I do not mind it myself.”
You nodded at that. Well, a union between your houses seemed to be right. You were both from The Reach and perhaps The Tyrells were more significant but The Hightowers were a real power, especially now. Sadly, your father seemed to be fixated on that whole idea of you marrying a Lannister.
Unless… Unless you would interfere somehow.
Your silence was interpreted by Ser Gwayne as a sign of exhaustion or boredom, though. He nodded his head and took a step back.
“It was nice to meet you before the tournament, my Lady,” he bowed his head. “I know there are dozens of knights around but, please, do remember about me while choosing your champion, I humbly ask,” he gave you one more dashing smile before walking inside his tent.
As a Lady for whom the tournament was taking place, you had the right to choose your champion. A man you favoured. Although, since the unofficial prize was your hand in marriage, it would be very awkward for a man who was not your champion to win. You assumed that your father would try to force you to choose Lord Jason Lannister.
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And you had been right. Now, when you were holding a golden rose prepared for this occasion as all the knights were standing in front of you and your family in the audience, your father squeezed you by your elbow. He leaned in to whisper into your ear:
“You shall give the rose to Lord Jason Lannister and name him your champion,” he said with a fake smile before moving away.
You swallowed thickly and took a step ahead to be able to reach the man you would choose. You glanced at The Lannister man on the horse – Tyland, pretending to be Jason. And in the audience nearby you there he sat – Jason, pretending to be Tyland. Your eyes met for a second and he grinned at you confidently although he had no idea you were aware of his plan.
You searched for a different pair of eyes now, amongst all the knights. And then you found them, the blue ones. His armour had beautiful ornaments and even his horse was armoured. It all looked so elegant and you smiled at the sight.
You bit on your lower lip. But was he a good knight? Did he actually stand a chance to win?
Well, you were about to find out.
“Ser Gwayne Hightower,” you took a few steps to the right to be closer to him as he commanded his horse to take a few steps ahead. “I choose you to be my champion,” you smiled at him and leaned in to hand him the golden rose.
“Lady (Y/N) Tyrell, it is an honour,” he bowed his head and you saw in his eyes that he was quite surprised that you had named him amongst all the men your champion. He took the rose from you carefully and pinned it to his armour before closing his helmet and returning to the other knights.
You took a deep breath in before walking away to take your seat. Your father’s burning gaze was nearly painful but your mother kept smiling, unaware of the schemings.
“That’s Otto Hightower’s eldest son. The Queen is his sister,” your mother babbled to your father. “Our daughter has chosen wisely,” she smiled at you. “And he’s handsome and quite young.”
Your father ignored her words and gave you a deadly glare instead but you only huffed and walked away, locking your eyes with Lord Jason again. The real one, sitting in the audience. He was not grinning anymore.
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Thankfully, Ser Gwayne turned out to be an excellent knight. Sadly, so was Ser Tyland Lannister, pretending to be his brother Lord Jason.
On the second day of the tournament, they already got rid of most of their opponents as they defeated them in combat. Some of the knights were seriously wounded.
On the third day it was already known that the last duel would be between Ser Gwayne and Ser Tyland. Everyone was taking bets and your father was gritting his teeth.
All this time, you were carefully watched by him and you had no opportunity to speak to any of the men taking part in the tournament. But on the night before the last, fourth, day when the final duel would take place, your father had thrown a feast, during which you were approached by Ser Jason Lannister.
Or Ser Tyland. Were they pretending to be each other during feasts as well? You were tempted to ask but you had no courage to do so.
“Lady Tyrell, there should be songs about your beauty,” he bowed his head and you bowed down.
“Lord Lannister,” you mumbled out, uninterested. “Why aren’t you busy writing them then?”
Your mother looked at you with terror in her eyes but you ignored her.
“Oh, believe me, I do not have time for such frivolities although I wish I had. However, my duties in Lannisport are many. My treasure is full and I shall spoil you with my goods when you are my Lady Wife,” he grinned at you, luring you with his wealth.
“You sound so sure that you’re going to win, my Lord,” you pointed out.
“Oh, I am sure. Ever since you named that Hightower knight your champion, I am determined to show him his place. But I hold no resentment towards you for your choice. I do realise that you, women from The Reach, like to tease,” he winked at you and you had to pretend his words were not an insult. Even your mother gasped a little at his boldness.
“I cannot believe you would spoil me with your wealth for nothing in return, my Lord,” you raised an eyebrow, curious of the response.
“Well, of course not. Like every husband I want my wife to be obedient, easy on the eye and give me many, healthy children,” he informed you. “Sons, I mean,” he fixed himself. That arrogant smirk was still on his face.
“I think your father is calling us,” your mother saved the day as she quickly took you by the arm and excused you both to walk you away from Lord Jason. “Oh, what an insufferable man! Sadly, your father seems to be fixated on the idea of you marrying him. And you know, dear (Y/N), after all the matches you had dismissed in the past… You just can’t say no now. Especially at your age,” she looked at you sternly, but still worried.
You didn’t answer that. You simply nodded your head and walked away to go outside and catch a breath.
You kept walking ahead of you, leaving the noise of the party behind you. You wanted to be alone and despite the darkness, you knew where you were going because you knew this garden better than yourself.
You entered the maze to hide in your favourite spot but after a while you heard unfamiliar steps behind you. You gasped and turned around to see a male silhouette, which caused a shiver go down your spine. If something happened to you now, unguarded and with no one to rescue if you called for help… You didn’t even want to imagine the consequences.
“That is only me, my Lady,” you heard a familiar voice and the man took a few steps ahead. It was Ser Gwayne Hightower, smiling at you.
“Ser Gwayne!” You pretended to sigh with relief but the truth was that you didn’t trust him either. You trusted no man who was creeping up on a Lady like that. “We shouldn’t be left alone without a chaperone,” you pointed out.
“Forgive me, I saw you running away and quite upset. I wanted to make sure nothing bad would happen to you as you wandered off from the crowd without any guards following you,” he lowered his voice as he approached you.
You swallowed thickly. He was right in front of you and behind you there was a tall live-fence that was making it impossible to escape. As he leaned in, his auburn hair fell onto his face and you felt it tickling your cheeks. That close he was.
“How chivalrous of you,” you breathed out, starting to feel dizzy. You had never been so close with a man.
He looked down, his gaze fixated on your tight, revealing dress. Your breasts were squeezed under the silky golden fabric.
“What if I don’t win tomorrow?” He asked as he lifted his eyes up again to meet yours. “Lord Jason is surprisingly good, especially for a man who is not a knight.”
“It’s because it’s not him,” you confessed with a heavy sigh and Ser Gwayne furrowed his brow at you.
“Are you suggesting that…?”
“I am not suggesting, Ser. It is true. I know from the very beginning, I have overheard them talking to my father. My father wants me to marry Lord Jason Lannister and this tournament is nothing but a show-off. He was angry at me for choosing you as my champion,” you told him.
Ser Gwayne seemed to be confused as he took a step back and you surprised yourself because you wanted him close again.
“That is… Unhonourable and disrespectful,” he pointed out. “Do you wish for Lord Jason to win as well, my Lady?” He looked at you, intensely.
“No! Why would I choose you as my champion then, Ser?” You shook your head, desperate to make him believe you.
“To toy with me, perhaps. Or to tease Lord Lannister,” Ser Gwayne pointed out.
“I do not wish to have anything in common with that man,” you huffed.
“And me? You do not know me, do you, my Lady?” Ser Gwayne smirked as he leaned in again, his nose nearly brushing yours as he put his right hand on the live-fence above you. You felt so small underneath him suddenly.
“What do you expect from a wife, Ser Gwayne?” You asked, swallowing a lump in your throat and he looked confused at that question as if it was a stupid thing to ask.
“Loyalty, of course,” he answered.
“And that’s it?” Now you were the surprised one. “What about children?”
“Well, it would be nice to have them, don’t you think, my Lady?” Ser Gwayne chuckled and rubbed your nose with his.
“What if I am flawed like my mother and I can give you only daughters?” You bit on your lower lip, slowly getting drunk at the feeling of having him so close.
“Then we shall make them all great ladies of great houses. My sister is The Queen. Us, Hightowers, we are ambitious,” he told you. “And I have many younger brothers who can produce their male heirs. The future of my family is safe whatever I do,” he assured you and raised his other hand to caress your cheek with his fingertips.
At first, you got startled at his touch as if it was causing you pain because you were not used to being touched like this by a male hand. But then, after a short while, you gave in and hummed to yourself, making him smirk.
You leaned back onto the live-fence and arched your back, connecting your crotch with his. You had no idea what made you do that… It was as if your instincts were telling you what to do. And it felt good.
“Don’t,” Gwayne scolded you and took a step back as you whined.
“Aren’t you here to claim me just in case you lose the duel tomorrow?” You asked, feeling your cheeks heating up. You couldn’t believe the boldness of your own words.
Lord Lannister had been right about the women from The Reach, apparently.
“Perhaps you should have not made me your champion, Lady Tyrell, if you think so lowly of me,” Ser Gwayne bowed his head and turned around to walk away, leaving you alone; confused and full of embarrassment.
One thing was certain – he was messing with your head. You couldn’t stop thinking of him all night long, touching yourself to the thoughts of him standing so close, to the memory of his touch and his voice.
You would rather die than marry Lord Jason Lannister. Any attempt to imagine anyone else other than Ser Gwayne touching you, was making you physically sick.
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You watched with fear, clenching your fists on the railing and leaning down to see better although, at the same time, you didn’t want to see; you were that scared.
You knew that people had been betting on who would win this combat. And more people had bet on The Lannister. Your eyes followed the golden rose attached to Ser Gwayne’s armour, though. You only wanted to keep looking at him as you prayed to the gods old and new for his victory.
The combat was fierce and long. Both of the horses got hurt and taken away and the two opponents were standing face-to-face now, having to duel with their swords on the ground.
Lord Jason Lannister – the real one, the one in the audience – stood up and clenched his fists on the railing, too, as he watched his twin brother.
“Come on!” He yelled and that was when the other Lannister struck Ser Gwayne down. “Yes! That’s right!” He cheered alongside the audience. Then, he looked at you with a smirk.
“Ser Gwayne!” You exclaimed in a high-pitched, scared voice.
To your relief, your champion stood up after taking the blow and you clenched your fists even tiger around the railing. You wouldn’t be surprised if you broke the wood with your hands.
After a few more attempts to strike each other down, both opponents were roaring with frustration. And then you spotted Ser Gwayne taking his helmet off and throwing it aside as people gasped.
Was he insane? You had been thinking that he was a rational man but apparently much less than you expected.
He looked up at you and nodded his head as the wind ruffled his auburn hair a little. You had to admit that he was presenting himself very handsome and you were aware that the helmet was limiting his view during combat but it was still very risky.
When you nodded back, he went back to the fight. His strikes and blows were fast and determined as if the fight was to death. You held your breath whenever he would get a punch or a strike since he was wearing no helmet. However, he seemed to be doing much better now.
Eventually, The Lannister was laying down and not standing up for quite a long time now as Ser Gwayne spat some blood out and looked up again – his face covered in blood and a few bruises but other than that, he was fine.
Your father stood up, carefully, before walking up to you to see with his own eyes. He hesitated and froze instead of announcing the winner and the whole audience was now looking at him.
“You shall announce my champion the winner,” you reminded him and he swallowed thickly.
“I… I announce Ser Gwayne Hightower the winner of this tournament. Congratulations!” He exclaimed and turned around this very instant to sit back down on his chair.
“You fought bravely, Ser Tyland,” Ser Gwayne helped his opponent to stand up as everyone froze at his words. “Oh, Lord Jason, do forgive me,” he nodded at him with a smirk before leaving the field.
Your heart picked up its pace and you couldn’t help a big grin. You glanced at The Lannister in the audience and he gave you a very unpleasant look this time. You couldn’t blame him, really. Ser Gwayne’s little mistake would make people gossip about The Lannisters cheating in the tournament. It was bringing you lots of satisfaction.
You were about to excitedly leave your parents’ side, when your father grabbed your wrist and stopped you.
“Where are you going?” He asked, harshly.
“To see my champion!” You answered him.
“Absolutely not,” your father shook his head. “You are coming with me to meet with The Lannister brothers,” he told you and both you and your mother widened your eyes at him.
“Father… Ser Gwayne has won the tournament… Fairly,” you pointed out.
“You said that the winner would have (Y/N)’ hand in marriage,” your mother reminded him.
“It was never officially announced, was it?” He barked at the both of you. “It was just a rumour.”
“Do you want to enrage The Hand of The King by disrespecting his son? Do you want to enrage The Queen herself by disrespecting her brother?” You asked him.
Your father let go of your wrist but he kept staring at you with anger and resentment in his eyes.
“Why did you want The Lannisters to win so badly?” You asked him. “To the point of letting them play it dirty and cheat?” You continued as your mother’s eyes were widening. “I have overheard your conversation on the first day while taking a stroll between the tents like you had forbidden me to,” you admitted. “Why, father?”
“My Lord Husband?” Your mother asked him, enraged by what she had just heard.
“Perhaps you have also overheard the part where I was saying that the tournament is a nice show-off,” he explained.
“I do understand why you threw the tournament. The question was not about that,” you raised an eyebrow at him and crossed your arms.
“Wealth,” was all he said after a short silence.
“And… that’s it?” You asked, disappointed.
Your father nodded and looked away.
“Wealth and splendour. An alliance between The Tyrells and The Lannisters would be a powerful one. And their treasure is big,” he added.
You opened your mouth to say something but you had no words.
“Your foolish sisters!” He continued as he raised his voice suddenly. “One married some Dornish lesser Lord and the other went up North to marry a knight in The Vale! The Ladies of House Tyrell! I should have been creating powerful alliances with you, foolish girls, but, no, all of you know better! All of you!” He yelled at you as your mother began to calm him down.
“I would never marry a man without an honour like Lord Jason Lannister,” you only said. “A cheater who plays dirty by using his brother because he knows very well that he would lose his very first combat if it was him down there,” you finished.
Without any other word, you hurried downstairs to run up to Ser Gwayne’s tent. His squire was working on removing his armour off of his body and you approached him to cup his bruised face splashed with blood.
“Ser Gwayne…” You started and then you swallowed thickly and looked down, remembering your encounter with him from the previous evening and the things you had been thinking of at night.
“Lady Tyrell,” he nodded at you with a smile.
“Are you alright, Ser? What has gotten into you to take the helmet off?” You asked as you dared to look up again, right into his blue eyes.
“It was limiting my view,” he answered. “I am alright, my Lady, no need to worry about me.”
“Are you always that irresponsible, Ser?” You asked yet another question. After all, it was important to know if he was supposed to be your Lord Husband.
“Never, my Lady. But it was rather an important combat, was it not?” He raised an eyebrow at you and you smiled widely at him.
You let go of his face as you took a few steps back to let his squire continue his work with the armour.
“I shall leave you now,” you nodded. “Thank you.”
“The pleasure is all mine, Lady Tyrell,” Ser Gwayne bowed his head slightly as he watched you walking out of his tent.
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There was a feast again on that evening but instead of being with the guests, your father was locked in the library with Ser Gwayne, discussing the unofficial prize of the tournament – your hand in marriage.
You were pacing around the corridor, all dolled up for the party in a pastel pink dress but with no interest to walk down and participate in the celebrations. You were afraid that your father would be rude to Ser Gwayne or scare him off, so you wanted to be around just in case you needed to put out some fire.
At first, you had chosen Ser Gwayne Hightower to be your champion simply to annoy your father and to avoid showing any favours to Lord Jason Lannister. But as the time progressed – especially after last night… – you just wanted to become Ser Gwayne’s wife. You would still live in The Reach and have your mother quite close but at the same time you’d be away from your father and his constant remarks of remaining unmarried despite your age.
Oldtown was an important place on the map of Westeros and you would be The Queen’s sister-in-law. Your father would be foolish to choose Lannister's gold over that honour.
The doors opened finally and you saw your father who was visibly surprised at the sight of you nervously pacing outside the library.
“Are you curious or nosy, dear daughter?” He asked you with his eyebrow raised.
“Perhaps both,” you answered.
“Either way,” your father shrugged, taking a step aside and revealing Ser Gwayne standing behind him, “that is not a problem of mine to deal with anymore,” he finished. “Disciplining her might be a challenge,” he chuckled at Ser Gwayne.
“With all respect, Lord Tyrell, I am not Lady (Y/N)’s father to discipline her,” Ser Gwayne nodded at him and approached you to hold your hands in his as he looked at your face. “We are going to get married, my Lady,” he announced to you and you smiled widely at him, feeling a huge wave of relief washing all over you. Relief, happiness and… excitement.
“When?!” Was all you asked before looking at your father’s face. He seemed to watch you carefully but wasn’t as displeased as before, right after the tournament.
“Ser Gwayne is running Oldtown in the name of his father so he must return there immediately tomorrow morning,” your father answered. “We will escort you to him for the wedding once all the preparations are finished. It shouldn’t take more than a few weeks.”
“A few weeks?!” You whined. “How am I supposed to wait for so long?”
Ser Gwayne chuckled at that and so did your father as you felt your cheeks heating up.
“You have been waiting for so long to get married, my dear, you can surely hold off a few weeks more,” your father pointed out.
But he didn’t understand. Now, when you actually wanted to become a wife and found a man worthy enough to be called your Lord Husband, you didn’t want to wait a day longer. However, being whiny about it would only make you look childish and desperate.
“I shall wait then,” you sighed and looked down in defeat.
“And I shall prepare The Hightower for your arrival, my Lady,” Ser Gwayne nodded at you. “What is your favourite colour, may I ask, my Lady, just so I know how to tell my people to decorate your new chambers?”
“It’s green, Ser Gwayne,” you answered with a soft smile. “Green and yellow like the colours of my house.”
“Something tells me we are going to be an excellent match,” Ser Gwayne smirked at your answer with a wink.
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MASTERLIST
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chaeeyull · 1 year ago
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Without a sense of obsession, I feel useless.
🫀🔪
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idkyetxoxo · 20 days ago
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Cregan Stark - Northern Frost Southern Sun
Summary - In the unforgiving North, a Southern princess struggles with her political marriage to Cregan, feeling like an outsider. As she voices her insecurities, their bond deepens, transforming their alliance into a passionate connection that bridges the divide between their worlds.
Pairing - Cregan Stark x Martell reader
Warnings - Sexual content (smut!)
Word count - 2124
Masterlist for Cregan • House of the Dragon General Masterlist.
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Born into nobility, my life had always felt scripted—a path inked not by my own desires but by the hands of the men around me. 
My father, my uncle, my brother, even the echoes of my grandfather shaped the walls around me. 
As a daughter of House Martell, the rulers of sun-drenched Dorne, my existence was predetermined, my fate a strategy in the game of thrones woven by my father, Prince Qoren Martell himself. 
A Martell daughter, after all, was a prize to be bartered, and he had chosen a formidable match.
He pledged me to Cregan Stark, Lord of House Stark, in the distant, unforgiving North. 
A union as calculated as it was unfeeling, our marriage was intended to bind the desert heat of Dorne with the ice and shadows of Winterfell. 
It was a pact, a quiet promise to fortify our realms and maintain a precarious balance in the ever-shifting powers of Westeros. My father assured me it was for our people, for peace. 
But I knew what the alliance would cost me: the endless winds that sliced through bone, the chill that would burrow into my soul, the lonely shadows that clung to Winterfell's walls like phantoms.
The North was all I had dreaded—an imposing land where silence lingered thickly in the air, and winter settled in more than just the stones. 
Every breath was laced with frost, every glance held a guarded judgment, as if they wondered if this southern-born woman could ever survive in a world so different, so grim. 
And always, there were whispers—"the Dornish wife"—spoken softly yet deliberately, trailing me like spectres through the dim corridors.
Yet amid the cold and the solitude, Cregan Stark surprised me. 
He was not the man I had envisioned: distant and unyielding, a creature as cold as the land he ruled. 
Instead, Cregan had a quiet strength, a kindness that seemed out of place in such a harsh land. He understood, perhaps better than I, the challenges I faced here. 
With subtle gestures and quiet assurances, he tried to ease my discomfort, his attentions more thoughtful than I'd dared hope. He never pressed, but he was there—a grounding presence, a warmth that, little by little, began to soften the edges of my isolation.
A moon had passed since our union. I was neither entirely happy nor entirely sorrowful; I was simply... here. 
Somewhere between contentment and restlessness, caught in a place that wasn't mine yet somehow, piece by piece, was becoming so. 
Winterfell was no closer to being home, but Cregan's attentions made the frigid halls more bearable, his patience an anchor as I drifted, my heart searching for familiarity in a sea of foreignness.
One evening, as twilight painted the snow in hues of indigo and grey, I stood on the balcony, gazing out across Winterfell. 
The frosty landscape stretched endlessly, an ocean of cold where dawn seemed forever on the edge of arriving but never quite here. 
As I watched the endless expanse of snow, I remembered the hot, golden sands of Sunspear. 
In Dorne, the sun-kissed our skin, the scent of ripe figs and sea salt filled the air. Here, every corner held a chill, every shadow seemed to whisper secrets.
In that stillness, I heard a voice—a voice I had come to know well, warm yet edged with the subtle command of a lord.
"What's on your mind?" Cregan's words reached me, low and tender.
Startled, I turned to see him leaning on the railing beside me, his gaze thoughtful. His presence was a welcome warmth, and yet I found myself instinctively closing in, the winter wind cutting through my gown.
"Nothing," I replied, a feeble defence as my voice carried softly into the chill.
He studied me quietly, his eyes catching the slight shiver that ran through me as the wind nipped at my shoulders. 
"Doesn't look like 'nothing,'" he said, his voice low. "You're cold. Come inside." 
Without waiting for my reply, he draped his cloak over my shoulders, guiding me toward the warmth of our chambers, stopping by the hearth as the flames crackled to life.
"I don't belong," I murmured, staring into the fire. My fingers traced the thick Northern fabric of my gown—a cloth I'd hoped would make me feel less like an outsider. 
The weight of the words hung between us as if spoken aloud for the first time, stirring the silence in the dim room.
"What do you mean, my love?" Cregan's voice broke the quiet, a softness I hadn't expected. 
He turned to face me, his eyes searching mine with a rare vulnerability as if my answer mattered more than the words themselves.
I took a long, steadying breath, watching the flames dance and trying to gather the right words. 
"They still see me as different," I whispered. "A stranger, from a land they neither know nor trust. I try to blend in, to be... what I think they want. But sometimes, I wonder if they'll ever truly see me as one of their own." 
My voice trembled as the truth spilt out, deeper than I'd intended. "They whisper, Cregan when they think I can't hear. They don't trust me. And some days, I'm not sure they ever will."
Cregan listened in silence, his gaze steady and unwavering. 
Without a word, he reached for my hand, his calloused fingers rough yet gentle as they enveloped mine, grounding me in the midst of my insecurities.
"Give them time," he said softly, his voice like a balm. "The North can be as harsh as winter itself, slow to warm, but it's not unyielding." 
His hand lifted my chin, guiding my gaze up to meet his. In his eyes, I saw not just kindness, but an unwavering strength, as if he could will my doubts away by the force of his conviction alone.
"You belong here, with me," he said, his voice a quiet promise. "No whispers or frost will ever change that."
I felt his words settle over me like a cloak, their warmth reaching parts of my heart I hadn't realized were cold. But still, uncertainty lingered, stubborn and unrelenting. 
Perhaps sensing my hesitation, Cregan shifted closer, his presence wrapping around me like an unbreakable fortress.
He cupped my cheek with a tenderness that both surprised and soothed me. 
"You are the heat I've always been missing," he murmured, his voice low and thick with meaning. 
Slowly, his hand drifted down, sliding under the folds of my gown with a touch that sent a shiver through me—a sensation born not of the cold, but of something deeper.
"What are you doing?" I asked, a laugh escaping as I fought back my nervousness.
"Showing you." His voice was gentle, a playful glint in his eyes. "Showing you that you belong."
With a tender confidence, his hands moved, sending ripples through me that melted the tension from my body. 
His touch was warm and steady, his fingers tracing up my sides, and for the first time since coming to the North, I felt my fears begin to ease as if his presence alone could erase them. 
The doubts, the whispers—they all faded as his hands explored, each caress a quiet reassurance.
His gaze held mine, unwavering, and in that moment, there was an intimacy that transcended touch, a promise woven in the quiet between us. 
He leaned in, his lips finding mine, capturing them with a gentleness that made me feel like I was being seen for the first time. His kiss was both soft and fervent, his lips warm as they moved against mine, igniting a fire that outmatched any northern hearth.
As his hands roamed over my body, rough and calloused from years of wielding steel, they were uncharacteristically gentle, tracing the lines of my skin as if memorizing each curve. 
His fingers held a kind of reverence, as if I were something precious, not just the wife bound to him by a political alliance but a person who was cherished.
In that moment, he lifted me, guiding me slowly towards the bed, never once breaking the kiss. 
I felt myself sink into the softness of the furs as he laid me down, the flickering fire casting its amber glow across the room, cocooning us in its warmth. 
There was a tenderness in his touch as he caressed me, his movements slow and purposeful, each gesture a quiet declaration.
The world outside the chamber ceased to exist; there was no cold, no looming suspicion, no whispers echoing down the corridors. 
Only Cregan and the fire between us, burning bright and fierce.
His lips trailed down my neck, each kiss a spark that sent warmth radiating through me. He paused, his gaze seeking mine as his hand found the ties of my gown, his touch both reverent and questioning. 
I met his eyes, giving him the permission he silently sought, and with careful, deliberate movements, he began to untie it, each pull of the fabric a slow unveiling.
As the gown slipped away, leaving me bare before him, I felt no vulnerability, only an overwhelming sense of being cherished. 
Cregan's eyes held nothing but admiration, and in that look, he banished every doubt, every whisper that had haunted me since I'd arrived in the North.
"You're beautiful," he murmured, his voice raw and thick with emotion. "So beautiful."
His words soaked into me, warming those fragile places hidden within, and I felt myself drawn to him, my fingers threading into his hair, pulling him close. 
His warmth was a balm, a grounding presence I needed as his lips found mine, slow and deliberate, speaking promises only we could hear.
With a practised, fluid ease, he shed the last of his clothes, his gaze never breaking from mine. 
His bare skin met mine in a press that was both electric and soothing, each inch of contact igniting a surge of feeling, of completeness that made me gasp. 
His hands traced down my sides, exploring the curves and lines of my body, as if they held secrets he'd yearned to know. 
Every touch, every brush of his fingers sent shivers across my skin.
He lowered himself, aligning our bodies with a reverence that made my heart ache. 
When he settled between my thighs, his touch shifted, moving from a delicate exploration to a quiet, steady possession. 
His grip on me tightened, anchoring me beneath him, and his eyes held a ferocity that was matched by the tenderness in his touch. He was wholly mine, and I, his.
"You're mine," he whispered his voice a low growl that sent a thrill through me. "Mine."
"Yes," I breathed, my fingers pressing into his shoulders as I clung to him, letting myself believe it. "Yours."
He moved with a deliberate rhythm, each thrust a declaration, an unspoken vow that silenced the doubts within me. 
Every part of me, every fragment I thought too broken to matter, felt seen, treasured. 
The warmth grew between us, winding up in intensity as he continued, his movements steady, yet laced with a simmering need that built with each passing moment.
His hands roamed over me, possessive yet reverent, fingers tracing gentle lines along my skin. His lips left trails of warmth, soft whispers mingling with our breaths. 
The connection between us thrummed with a strength that felt sacred, binding us beyond words, deeper than the physical.
Our rhythm intensified, his hands gripping my waist, his lips capturing my moans as we chased the rising wave together. 
The air was thick with the sounds of our bodies, the soft crackle of the fire, the murmurs of our whispered names.
In that moment, there was no North or South, no whispers of "the Dornish wife." There was only Cregan and me, bound together by a love that had taken root in the most unlikely of places.
When the climax came, it hit with a force that left us breathless, a bliss that surged through us like fire and water, fierce yet softening. 
He held me through it, our breaths mingling as we trembled in the aftermath, our hearts beating as one.
Cregan collapsed beside me, his arms wrapping around me as he pulled me close. We lay there in the afterglow, our bodies entwined, the fire casting a soft glow over us.
"You belong here," he murmured, his voice a soothing balm to my soul. "With me."
"I do," I replied, my heart swelling with a newfound certainty. "I belong with you."
As I drifted off to sleep in his arms, I knew that no matter the challenges we might face, we would face them together. 
The North might be cold and unforgiving, but with Cregan by my side, I felt a warmth that could withstand any storm. 
And in his embrace, I found not just a home, but a love that would endure.
A/n - I am such a sucker for any Dornish reader works 😝
Cregan tag list - @veesuguru
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mrscarpenter · 2 months ago
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BED CHEM
Jacaerys Velaryon x Dornish!reader
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Summary: The Prince gets send to gain a powerful alliance that the house targaryen has wanted for a long period of time, and he stumbles upon you. A gorgeous dornish queen.
Includes/warnings: dornish!reader this is probably horribly written so thats a warning in itself, not proof read but i believe Y/N has been used on multiple occasions. Did not give reader a description other than female & dark black curls. There is an age gap in this (reader is 16, jacaerys is 19, but it is never actually mentioned) like i said, not proof read, if you see any spelling errors feel free to point them out!
🪐notes: idk much abt the dornish, especially not in this timeline/au so please ignore any mistakes. Jace is not engaged to baela in this. :)
from my short & sweet collection
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You were standing in the hall of your castle in SunSpear. Waiting for the arrival of the prince Jacaerys Velaryon, heir to the iron throne and prince of DragonStone. Or he would be, had King Aegon Targaryen not usurped the iron throne.
The weather in Dorne was always exceptionally hot, so you wore a sheer gown. One thing about the Dornish was that you were not ashamed of anything, especially not what the gods had given you. The dress was a dark blue, with red and gold detailing, your long black curls hanging loosely over your shoulders.
Once you saw the prince arrive, you stood up straighter, clearing your throat silently, allowing a faked smug expression to fall upon your face.
“Prince Jacaerys Velaryon, to what is the pleasure of your presence owed?”
It was all a different environment to what he was used to at DragonStone. The strong breeze of hot air, the lack of thick winter-like clothing, the more exposed body, the tanned skin... it was all such a strange sight to a prince accustomed to the cold. He bowed gently towards the young Queen of Dorne, and looked at her dress. He admired the work that her seamstresses had to do to look so good on her.
“A pleasure indeed, my lady. May we chat inside? It is quite hot here, I confess.”
you nod curtly. “Of course. i am afraid i am in a bit of a hurry though, many important matters to attend.” You point out a hand, allowing him to walk beside you as you walk up the steps into the castle.
Jacaerys follows you, watching the way you walk and the environment surrounding the palace. The hot air, the sun, the tanned skin.
He looks over at you, trying to figure out more about the queen of Dorne. “You are quite young, my lady. Not that I'm much older, but tell me what's it like being queen so young?”
“I am quite used to it. I have been Dorne’s ruler since i was 6 summers old. The Dornish are respectable people, and very direct. It hasn’t always been easy, but it felt natural.” You spoke.
Jacaerys nodded as you walked, thinking it was somewhat impressive someone that young could ever rule. He smiled slightly at your comment.
“I can see the directness in you already, if you'll forgive my boldness. You don't seem like you're the type of woman to beat around the bush, are you?”
Jacaerys was trying to figure you out, as any man with an interest in women would do. He walked beside you as you both spoke, trying to gauge his chances.
after a few seconds you speak up “No, i indeed am not. And i do not expect anyone else to either, if i step on anyone’s toes with my words, they are not company i should keep.”
That comment made Jacaerys smile, appreciating your honest nature. He couldn't deny how attractive blunt honesty was, especially in a place where everyone was so used to keeping secrets and making alliances all the time. “So you speak plainly?”
He knew women with bluntness often became some of the most interesting ones. And a queen, with an attitude like that, made a very intriguing proposition. As curious as your boldness made him, he couldn't deny his physical interests.
That dress... Gods...
You bring him out of his thoughts with your reply. “Yes i speak plainly, and so should you, Prince Jacaerys.” You spoke softly, almost gentle-like. It was very refreshing.
Jacaerys took a long look at your body, his eyes slowly glancing at the details of your dress. The way the skirt of the dress swayed with your movements and how the gown itself left little to the imagination. The way your curly locks dangled and moved. The way your skin shone with the sun's blessing...
His gaze finally returned to your face, the soft features combined with the dark eyes and long wavy hair. He couldn't deny what was crossing his mind right now. Your blunt nature, combined with the way you looked, was certainly making him wish for things.
He couldn't help himself, as he took another look at you, before finally speaking. “That must come in handy for a queen like you, my lady. You're much less... complicated than one would expect from a ruler.”
Jacaerys approached one step closer, his eyes still locked on yours.
“If I may ask, are you married or betrothed by any chance?”
Your blunt words, your direct manner, and your pretty face only encouraged his desires. And it seemed the prince was rather blunt with his intentions as well.
Your eyes locked with his, as he asked the question you were certain was coming.
Of course, he must be interested in some deal. Just like any man, the prince wouldn't be able to simply let a beautiful young queen pass by.
You took a moment to think, wondering what to share.. or perhaps hide. "No, my prince. I am unmarried."
The corner of Jacaerys' mouth curled into a small, cocky smile. "Oh, is that so?"
A hint of teasing was clear in his voice, his eyes still looking for something in yours.
"Well, I suppose that does have some upsides."
He took another step closer, until he was at an arm's distance. The young prince could smell the scent of the air in Dorne, the sun-kissed skin, and the expensive perfumes of a queen. "Tell me, how might a man catch the interest of the queen of Dorne?"
The prince's voice had the tone of teasing, making your eyebrow raise slightly. His sudden proximity also caught you slightly off guard, his physical interests becoming very clear to you.
You couldn't deny how handsome he was. And you guessed perhaps you could use a bit of fun, considering you were unmarried and in your youthful prime.
You tilted your head slightly, looking up at him, his eyes burning a hole through your face. "Hm... What are you offering? Your family is at war, are they not? your visit is political.”
The prince let out a quiet chuckle, letting his eyes wander over your body for a moment.
The dress was certainly eye-catching, the way it hugged your curves, allowing his imagination to let loose...
The words you spoke only made his eyes find their way back to your own, and the smirk he had on his face only grew.
"Is the possibility of a political alliance enough to catch your interest, my lady?"
You watched the prince's eyes as they caressed your body, the boldness in his gaze, and the clear interest that you knew was there. You knew how to take advantage of an opportunity..
"Depends on what kind of a deal you're suggesting, my prince." There was an undeniable flirtation in your voice, your own subtle way of teasing him.
The prince didn't hide the smirk that spread across his face after that statement. His hand slowly reached over to your waist, his touch feeling the silky fabric of your dress.
"Would a marriage perhaps suffice?"
Your dress, as thin as it already was, provided no barrier against his touch. You could feel each stroke of his fingers, his thumb moving in circular motions against the thin fabric.
The marriage proposal was expected, but it seemed the prince had a more hands-on approach in mind.
You kept a straight face, not to give away how your mind was beginning to wander with the possibility of a marriage. "What would I gain? And what would you expect in return?"
He didn't let your serious expression stop his hands from wandering over the silk of your gown, his hand moving across your waist and down your side. "You would gain protection, support, and a powerful alliance."
"And I would gain..." He leaned closer, his breath against your skin, "A gorgeous Dornish queen as a wife..."
Your heart began to race as his words and his hand continued it's exploration of your side, the anticipation of where those hands might end up was growing.
The prince's proximity and the way he slowly looked at you, expecting some kind of reaction. You stayed firm, holding back the subtle reaction you felt with his words.
"Hm... We might have a deal, my prince."
And with that, his lips ended on yours.
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Requested by: @avatar4life
explore post. masterlist.
please comment and reblog if you enjoyed. <3
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© mrscarpenter, 2024.
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weasleyreidstyles · 1 year ago
Text
Serendipity Masterlist!
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series status: ongoing
summary: it was only meant to be a purely transactional relationship. he would help her strengthen her abilities in return for her getting his friends out of his father's nasty path. he didn't mean to fall for her, but loving her was the easiest thing in his dark world.
“serendipity is the phenomenon of discovering something interesting or valuable by chance”
pairings: mattheo riddle x fem!ravenclaw reader; platonic!slytherins x fem!reader; platonic!golden trio x fem!reader
no use of Y/N, but your general nickname is Meadow. All characters are aged up to be over 18. and Bellatrix isn't Mattheo's mother in this fic (just fyi)
general warning(s): 18+ content, angst, fluff, some canon compliance, some canon divergence, typical wizarding world violence, war, torture, drugging, hospitals, familial problems, mean!harry, mean!ron....
** indicates smut warning
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~∞~ chapter one
chapter summary: on the trainride to your sixth year, your friends give you a proposition that you can't refuse.
~∞~ chapter two
chapter summary: it's your first day back as a sixth year student. Classes are more intense and your first lesson with Mattheo ensues.
~∞~ chapter three
chapter summary: the first Hogsmeade trip of the year has a rather unpleasant ending.
~∞~ chapter four
chapter summary: after you end up confined to the Hospital Wing, you're surprised when Professor Dumbledore pays you a visit.
~∞~ chapter five
chapter summary: Mattheo has been avoiding you. You find and confront him after a frustrating week.
~∞~ chapter six **
chapter summary: the growing tension between you and Mattheo snaps. He reveals something about yourself that you has scarcely any prior knowledge of.
~∞~ chapter seven
chapter summary: joyful dinner parties and a switch in point of view. Two juxtaposing starts to the christmas holidays.
~∞~ chapter eight **
chapter summary: you're given plenty of revelations: all equally as daunting as the other.
~∞~ chapter nine
chapter summary: Ginny ambushes you in the library and Ron's birthday is off to a delirious start.
~∞~ chapter ten
chapter summary: in the aftermath of Ron's poisoning, Harry learns a thing or two about where your loyalties lie when he overhears your private conversation with the headmaster.
~∞~ chapter eleven
chapter summary: intent on avoiding him, you underestimate just how desperate Mattheo is to be around you.
~∞~ chapter twelve
chapter summary: new friendships are formed and you finally learn to control your abilities. Mattheo comes to a life altering realisation.
~∞~ chapter thirteen **
chapter summary: idk how to summarise this but i will say it's pure smut...enjoy
~∞~ chapter fourteen
chapter summary: friendships are rekindled and you save Draco from certain death in Moaning Myrtle's bathroom, igniting your powers in the process.
~∞~ chapter fifteen
chapter summary: now fully recovered, Draco has a task to complete. The fate of the Wizarding World hangs in the precipice of his actions.
~∞~ chapter sixteen
chapter summary: after a startling and gutting discovery. secrets are revealed and alliances are questioned as Voldemort's tyranny begins to fester into the beginnings of another war.
*invisible string fits into the plot here!!*
~∞~ chapter seventeen
chapter summary: Dumbledore's funeral reveals new allies as you navigate a world without its protector.
~∞~ chapter eighteen
chapter summary: with his new role as a secret spy of the Order, Mattheo begins to grapple with the consequences of the horrors that occur at his father's hand.
~∞~ chapter nineteen
chapter summary: there's a spy in The Order and you make a decision that Mattheo is vocally against in every way.
~∞~ chapter twenty
chapter summary:
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series oneshots/headcannons:
~∞~ tulips & starlight – valentines day drabble
~∞~ serendipity hcs (mattheo) – a glimpse at his life pre sixth year
~∞~ invisible string – bonus scene from chapter 16 **
~∞~ snippets of navigating fifth year with fred weasley
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series taglist:
message me or comment to be added :)
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all works are my own (2025©️weasleyreidstyles), do not copy, translate or repost.
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