#secondly although she's a little black thing

[pseudospectre]

Sent an application for a kitten on Petfinder tonight. I'm irrationally scared they'll reject me for some reason :/ but Selkie needs a buddy and I've been scrolling looking for a little face that calls to me. And she does. So I hope I hope!

[musicalslugs]

Grace and the Lords in Black: an analysis.

Okay, so, this may be obvious; although I haven’t seen anyone mention this as of yet. The link between Grace Chastity and the Lords in Black is clear, I mean we’ve all agreed that she seems to be like that, and Dirty Dudes must Die highlights her “corruption” plainly.

That being said! I think there may be more.

Firstly, the Lords in Black mention/talk to Grace first, before Peter and Stephanie (the arguable proper protagonists of this story).

Sure, Blinky’s motif is obvious, it’s of eyes, of watching and of observation. But to speak to Grace first, even if it seems (on the surface level) that it’s just to flex their omniscience and make her uncomfortable, is a little strange. Especially since they then speak mostly (only) to Steph for the rest of the song [The Summoning].

Secondly, because if that were all this wouldn’t be a very good analysis, we have her (Grace) and Nibbly being echoes of eachother.

“Swallow” and “devour” are synonymous. Both fit into Nibbly’s motif of consumption. Now, Grace could’ve said anything. Absorb, harness, control etc. I think the wording here is particular. Not exactly the same, but clearly within the same ball park.

What is exactly the same though, is Grace Chastity and Wiggly.

This may seem a bit out of left field at first, but hear me out.

In The Summoning, it is said that “Wiggly wants his Wrath”, Wrath is a vice, a sin. It may not be the exact opposite of Chastity, however Chastity is to do with restraint, whereas Wrath is very much, not so. Moreover, Wrath can be defined as ‘a great anger that expresses itself in a desire to punish someone’. Now… who else could be described as wrathful? Obviously Max. And Grace. I mean, her song is called Dirty Dudes must Die. As well as being a direct reflection of Max, it implies that she wants to harm someone. Punish someone though? Well, yes. Grace says “This is the consequence of what you’ve done!” - she must believe that death is a worthy punishment for their actions (being ‘pervs’). Thus, Wrath.

Lastly, and this is where the exactly comes in, Grace and Wiggly both say the same things. (Again, of course, I could write another analysis on how Grace and Max reflect each other beautifully by also saying the same/extremely similar things) The difference between Grace saying similar things to Max, is that she and Wiggly aren’t similar. It’s the same.

Example A) Stephy / Stephie.

Upon rewatching Nerdy Prudes Must Die and listening to the album on repeat, I noticed that no one bar these two call Stephanie: Stephie. I know Grace calls Ruth, Ruthy and Peter, Petey- so her calling Stephanie, Stephie, makes sense linguistically. That doesn’t take from the fact that Wiggly is the only other ‘person’ to use that particular moniker.

Example B) “bloody bits”

A particularly strange phrase that these two say. However, not really. The point of this analysis is to point out the links between the Lords in Black and Grace Chastity, specifically Wiggly and Grace. By pointing out the parallels in their idiolects, I have come to the conclusion that they are not only linked but INCREDIBLY similar.

Both are characters that use cutesy, almost childish language (“mommy spot” / “belly-well”) to disguise the violence, the wrath that lays beneath the surface. Wiggly (as shown in Black Friday) uses it as a facade. Throughout Black Friday and throughout The Summoning, he expresses himself as non-threatening (“We’re all pally-wals.” etc) before eventually showing what’s beneath the surface (“..deck the fucking halls!” / “We don’t give a shit about your phone!”). Both times are as abrupt as each other, showing that Wiggly has a fairly short temper. Grace doesn’t necessarily have a short temper, instead she has periods of ‘sin’, when stressed: Dirty Girl, calling “God a son of a B-Word”, smoking (after), having sex with Max, the scene of her ordering hot water etc etc. The visage, her carefully constructed facade, slips. Wether it’s because deep down she doesn’t believe in God (possibly shown in her “are you religious?” conversation with Shapiro), or that due to her upbringing she’s being confined, restrained, controlled, and this is when her ‘true self’ begins to peer through the cracks.

Either way, these are two characters who use similar themes (one of childishness, the other of purity/innocence (which can also be linked to childishness)) to cover their violence, their real selves.

Uhhh- anyway, watch Nerdy Prudes must Die on Youtube- it gave me brain worms.

[tadc-harlequin-au]

God I'm way too invested in this au. Anyway I wanna hear more of the biology of the puppets and marionettes (might make fanart maybe)

I don't think I'm fully ready to delve into the topic of a Marionette because it reveals major story spoilers, for now just know that they are completely and utterly devoid of life, forever following an endless directive.

For the Puppets, I guess I can give a little bit more information about them, as long as I'm not crossing a personal story boundary I've set for myself lol

Once a Puppet reaches the first enlightenment stage, black tendrils begin to appear on their innermost structures slowly but steadily, as I've explained with Caine.

These things, these transformations... they can be jarring for the Puppet experiencing them for the first time especially when the Puppet starts to feel full sensations such as an electrifying jolt, a pain, or a touch, but make no mistake; aside from their weird alien appearance they mean no danger, and they can even come in pretty handy.

About half-way through the story, Pomni actually gains new abilities everytime she reaches a stage of enlightenment, and there are six steps to achieving the full process, and it may vary on how fast or slow these Puppets can achieve them.

Yeah, can you tell this is like, the leveling up system? lol

Firstly, let's start with Awareness.

Awareness is when a Puppet grows to think beyond their directive; their thoughts becomes separated from the imprinted norm that they used to know their whole existence.

Although, it's still the first stage, which means that even if a Puppet begins to think original thoughts for themselves, they'll still have a tendency to follow the original commands.

They'll just start thinking "hey, maybe I should stop and think about what exactly I'm doing for a second. Just for a second. Then I promise I'll go back to my routine."

At this rate, there's not much changes happening on the physical, except letting a Puppet feel physical touch, despite their mechanical body.

Secondly; Sentience

Sentience is when a Puppet grows... well, a genuine sentience, one that wasn't pseudo and pre-programmed into their very being.

They'll start exploring aspects that they haven't thought of exploring, and this is where creativity and imagination gets to shine a little more if the Puppet is on the creative side of things.

a Puppet may undergo a change of personality (not always guaranteed), so don't be surprised when the once-happy-go-lucky puppet starts crying out of nowhere.

black tendrils may seep out of an exposed joint or a cracked part, but they're only tiny little veins.

Thirdly; Conscience

Conscience is when a Puppet starts to feel emotions based on an inner moral system, that wasn't, again; pre-programmed into them.

they'll start to THINK what's right or wrong based on personal experiences, or maybe even remember their OWN former moral system from their past life, and even a combination of the two.

This is usually the part where they'll start to judge the directive imprinted into them, maybe bouts of unknown regrets will come too.

the veins become more noticeable at this stage, and can now be used for physical attributes/advantages.

Fourth; Reminiscence

This one is usually in tandem with the third, but not everyone can have the same case, since it always varies between all of them.

Reminiscence is when a Puppet remembers their past life prior to becoming what they are now; no strings holding them back from recalling anymore.

These come in the form of seeing major life events unfold right between your eyes; whereas before, there'll only be hazy glimpses.

Fifth; Persipience

Persipience is when a Puppet becomes wiser, and can now overcome the directive they were tasked with if they wished to.

This process can be agonizing for some because it is similar to the symptom of a withdrawal from an addiction.

Fortunately, once they've gotten over past that obstacle, they'll gain full automation over their bodies, the "itch" no longer as present as it used to be.

Sixth; Enlightenment

The final step.

A Puppet needs to come to terms with their new discovery.

They need to be at peace with the process of what had happened to them, accepting the progression from "Human" to "Puppet" as a part of their existence.

Final evolution takes place, and the Puppet can now fully utilize their soul magic to it's fullest extent.

Just like wisdom, not many are willing to go through this process/or can achieve this, since accepting the idea of "becoming a Puppet" like it's similar to the concept of growing up from adolescence to adulthood can be hard for some to fully stomach.

Although, it is considered as the "fully matured" process of the six stages.

Now, Madness takes just as much of steps as Enlightenment does. Only this time, you're on the wrong end of the stick.

Firstly; there's Isolation.

As the name itself applies, isolation is when a Puppet denies/is denied social interaction that their soul wants, prioritizing objectives over anything.

Subtle twitchiness may occur.

Secondly; Revelation

A revelation settles deep within a soul fragment laying inside a puppet's heart; they're trapped, and there's no escape.

Can also be called "entrapment", but revelation is cooler and sounds more fancy

Thirdly; Rebellion

Rebellion is when an attempt to rebel against the internal system of a Puppet takes place, but is not achieved due to the lack of free will and sentience on the physical and mental body.

The body becomes more uncontrollable, dangerously swinging and twisting.

the literal metaphor of an internal battle happening within oneself.

Fourth; Corruption

Another attempt is made by the soul energy, only this time, it's harnessing the worse aspects of a Puppet to propel itself and grow physically stronger, a desperate option.

large, black tendrils may burst through weaker parts and/or limbs; namely joints.

Repairs? What's that? Who even needs 'em lmaoooo

Fifth; Obsession

A Puppet begins to obsess over directives; a byproduct of the soul energy harnessing the negative traits that it's host was ingrained with.

The physical appearance of a Puppet becomes more grim, overexaggerated features that you'd only see in horror movies start to become more prominent.

Work is non-stop, no breaks. Liberation is irrelevant. The concept of humanity is irrelevant. They only exist to follow their directives now. If some shithead wants to tell you otherwise, they will fucking DIE.

Sixth; Madness

You've grown physically stronger. But at what cost?

ANYWAYS that was a massive infodump, what were talking about again?

Oh right. Puppet biology.

Uh, They're hella weird.

[ilovespec]

Shark Love ~

Yandere Fem ! Gang leader × civilian Fem ! reader. Part 1

WARNING!!!: description OF SEVERE WOUNDS , swearing in Italian , yandere has anger problems, just fucking gang members , YANDERE HERSELF IS THE LEADER of THE GANG , a small description of torture , a sadistic character , Yandere is a female , and Y/N too.

6834 words

part 2

part 3

Today, Y/N has finally started life with a clean slate.. Finally she moved to a new city! There were just some strange moments... Firstly.. Housing prices are too pleasant... Secondly, salaries are higher here than in her city.. And what is even more strange.... There are too many jobs and vacant houses here... Maybe it 's just not such a busy city , and that 's a good thing! Then no one will make noise under the windows at night! Although there will be no noise under the windows, much worse things will happen..

｡･:*:･ﾟ’☆

Y/N has already managed to find a job! She got a job in an office, which fortunately was next to her house! And that's a little weird... Next to the house where her apartment was.. Strange people often hung around.. Namely, unusually tall and muscular women and men..covered in scars and tattoos... Perhaps it's just avid bikers ..? Really .. Yes ..? After all, when selling her apartment, the realtor did not tell her that this is a criminal area...!!! It's possible that she's just winding herself up and it's just bikers... But for some reason, their clothes don't look very much like biker ones... Tank tops without sleeves...polo shirts... Turtlenecks... Sweatpants or classic trousers, formal suits with ties.... And not a single hint of leather jackets or other biker stuff... Which is strange... Okay, maybe Y/N just developed a little paranoia......

｡･:*:･ﾟ’☆

It was late in the evening...Y/N was returning home from work... It was already about 7-8 o'clock in the evening... Suddenly ! She heard screams of pain, agony, and sobs from the alley... Foolishly, Y/N came unsteadily, looked into the alley and was horrified.... THERE WAS A GUY BLEEDING ON THE GROUND!!! His left hand was already missing fingers and half of the skin... And it is clear that the wound has already slightly festered due to the dirt.. There were already many burns on his right hand , and 3 fingers were broken .. HIS FACE DIDN 'T EVEN FUCKING RESEMBLE A FACE , BUT MINCED MEAT !!! And all this was done to him , and the strange girl continued to do it ..next to her , on the asphalt lay bloody pliers, a hammer, a dagger and various other scary sharp things covered in blood.. She was wearing a black turtleneck, and black classic trousers with lace-up boots.. She had long, grey hair slightly disheveled to the waist, and pale skin... Y/N couldn't see her face because this girl had her back to her.. And she kept torturing the poor guy.. But after a couple of seconds, SHE TURNED AROUND AND STARED AT Y/N WITH A SADISTIC GRIN!! She has narrow brown eyes, Asian facial features and quite a few scars on her face..

- CLEARLY A FUCKING DANGEROUS GIRL: ohh~ what kind of cute lamb wandered in here ~ you look like you're going to faint~ ah, aren't you having fun? ~ I'm just punishing this pathetic insect who betrayed the boss and gave out important information to another gang~

Y/N backed away, and met something solid with her back. She thought it was a wall... But this creepy and dangerous girl stared at this "wall" that was behind Y/N, and stuttered slightly..

- CLEARLY A FUCKING DANGEROUS GIRL: O-oh... B-Boss.... Haha.. B-But I'm c-conducting an interrogation.. Oh, I w-was about to t-take that g-girl down.. B-Boss don't w-worry-

This OBVIOUSLY dangerous girl broke off at the end of her word because this supposedly wall, which turned out to be a woman, jerked from behind Y/N AND PUNCHED HER RIGHT IN THE FACE OF THIS GIRL , and began shouting obviously furious words ... Uhhh... What language is this...? Italian seems to be...

-A strange savior: MIKI MORI HAI GIÀ SUPERATO IL LIMITE !!! QUESTA DOLCE RAGAZZA È UNA CITTADINA ORDINARIA CHE È APPENA PASSATA E DEVI TROVARE UN POSTO MIGLIORE PER INTERROGARE, VEDI QUANTO È SPAVENTATO QUESTO AGNELLO, HAH?!!?! HAH?!!??

While her strange savior was yelling at this dangerous girl.. And her savior was ALSO CLEARLY MORE DANGEROUS THAN THIS GIRL MANY TIMES OVER !! Y/N was able to see it... Her approximate height was 6'5 feet, she had Italian facial features (which is clear from the language she is shouting in now)... She has a rather unusual hairstyle... Short, like a man's.. And the coloring of her hair is a little strange.. Each of her strands alternates between white and yellow ... She has tanned skin.. Blue eyes... Broad shoulders and A LOT OF SCARS ON HER ARMS!! a small piercing on the lower lip and on the left eyebrow... There is a scar on the left side of her jaw.. And there's a longish scar on her right eye, like an animal wound.. And the scariest and strangest thing about her.. SHE'S GOT FUCKING TEETH ALMOST LIKE A SHARK'S!!! THE TIPS OF HER TEETH ARE SHARPENED , FUCK!!! It's scary.. But at the same time it suits her strangely..She is wearing a grey polo shirt, black trousers, a black leather belt with an iron plaque, and classic black leather shoes..AND ABRUPTLY !! Someone gently grabbed her armpits and carried her out of the alley like a cat...

｡･:*:･ﾟ’☆

It was.. More simply, but also a menacing-looking girl..She has dark brown hair..It's also a man's haircut, but a longer one.. German and soft facial features.. Blue eyes.. Prominent cheekbones..FUCK !! SHE HAS A SCAR STRETCHING FROM THE LEFT CORNER OF HER MOUTH AND PROTRUDING FANGS LIKE AN ANIMAL!!! Piercing of the left eyebrow and piercing in the ears.. A scar on her neck.. AND THERE ARE A LOT OF FUCKING SCARS ON HER HANDS TOO!! She is wearing a white sleeveless T-shirt, black sweatpants with a white stripe on their right side, a black bandana on her head , and simple black and white sneakers

- Quite a beautiful but threatening girl: Uh... Hi, are you okay..? You better not look.. My boss, the shark, is scolding my friend right now... We call her "dolphin" because of her habits and.. How to say it... An unnecessarily sadistic and evil character... and... uh... well... I'm Martina by the way.. And you? >-<

-Y/N: I'm fine myself.. But I'm pretty scared... uh.. Nice to meet you, I'm Y/N..

As a sign of familiarity, Martina gently patted Y/N on the shoulder.. Her hands are so callused..

｡･:*:･ﾟ’☆

When the furious screams in Italian stopped from the alley, this "boss shark" came out.

-Mysterious and OBVIOUSLY dangerous "boss shark": So, piranha. Take the dolphin to her apartment, and I'll take this carino cittadino to her house..

thisa mysterious and dangerous woman HUGGED HER BY THE SHOULDERS, AND WAVING GOODBYE TO HER SUBORDINATE, CONFIDENTLY WALKED WITH Y/N TO HER HOUSE!!

-A mysterious and OBVIOUSLY dangerous "boss shark": Well.. As far as I remember, ordinary civilians have a bad nervous system, I hope you weren't too "traumatized" by seeing this? There was literally almost a living corpse there..

Y/N shook her head , and continued walking in embarrassment

-Mysterious and OBVIOUSLY dangerous "boss shark": my name is Squalo. I won't tell you my last name, you won't remember it. And as far as I've heard, you're Y/N. Nice name, it suits you..

Squalo gave Y/N a toothy smile, showing her shark teeth..

｡･:*:･ﾟ’☆

A few minutes later they reached her house.

-Squalo: Good night to you, agnello carino~

Squalo ruffled Y/N's hair and winked at her and left with her hands in her pockets... It was definitely an evening...and with a slightly heavy soul, Y/N went into her apartment and went to sleep..

How do you like this part?? in a couple of minutes I'll post a description and drawings of these characters >3<

lol, I'm 100% sure that Squalo will have this on the second wallpaper on the phone : (on the first wallpaper, of course, Y/N.)

Carino cittadino: cute citizen.

Agnello carino: cute lamb

(I think it makes no sense to translate into English just Italian swearing..)

[dnpoll]

my personal explanations below the cut!

also i scheduled this poll and i realised i forgot ARIANA GRANDE that's deep lore... GOD

muse: one of the things that dan and phil bonded over when they met each other - phil's favourite artist with his streams making it dan's top artist from 2014-2016. they have also seen muse at least five times! dan has played muse songs several times on the piano (specifically sunburn) + they did a lip sync video to muse for bbc radio. also they made fun of kristen stewart a lot when they were younger (they have since apologised and called her an iconic) and she was in twilight and muse supermassive black hole is famously in twilight so...

final fantasy vii: the soundtrack with interrupted by fireworks! dan said it reminded him of phil in a formspring answer <3 and that's all...

fall out boy: firstly "no but seriously imagine if:". secondly they have interviewed fob several times for the bbc! thirdly, specifically with pete wentz, he was dan's icon in his teenage years. he followed dan because of the interviews with him - he even prank called dan in call or delete. but as punishment in a best friend quiz video, phil tweeted "sometimes i dream about being one of the reindeer galloping through the sky with leather straps tying me to my friends mm yes carrots please" from dan's account - and pete wentz unfollowed fob. i am also convinced they think the milk fic is a petekey fic or something

the 1975: dan and phil called into the radio as fans when they were not hosting and the 1975 was there! dan said he was there with "his friend phil" and matty healy immediately recognised them as "dan and phil from the radio" despite them trying to be sneaky about it. dan also LOVED a brief inquiry into online relationships which he posted on his story and said he was "personally attacked by literally every song on the album". mm okay

my chemical romance: firstly "no but seriously imagine if". secondly dan specifically was/is a huge fan of mcr - although phil did sing welcome to the black parade (incorrectly) in a yasuhati video). mcr was also referenced in dan and anthony padilla's stop emo hate video, basically i'm gay and the dream daddy series, just to name a few (they g note a LOT). also hesitant alien featured in the tour of dan's brain video! gerard used to follow dan on twitter but doesn't anymore... beef?

panic! at the disco: firstly "no but seriously imagine if". also brendon and ryan are in the milk fic which they constantly reference. also there's a dnp edit with 57k views to house of memories

frank ocean: dan's top song in 2012 was "thinkin about you" by frank ocean which ppl talk abt a lot for many reasons. he also said his religion was frank ocean in 2016 LOL

troye sivan: YOUTUBE FRIENDS LOL - the iconic pic with dan, phil, troye and tyler! also dan and phil were the first people to play troye sivan's happy little pill on the radio, and are thus partially responsible for his success. troye sivan also led to chappell roan's success, so basically muse is responsible for chappell roan. troye also featured in a phil glasses video!

one direction: firstly, dnp interviewed them - a harrowing event that they outline in detail in tabinof. secondly, the iconic dan eating an orange picture behind a 1d concert. lastly, they talk about harry styles quite a bit - phil posed as him in a viewers pick my outfit, and of course the rotisserie chicken situation

nick jonas: hey buddy you in london #dick

smash mouth: more recent dan-based lore but mark (tour member) made an instagram story asking how to get all-star licensed. a phannie (royalsdnp on twt) then tweeted about it, and smash mouth (the twt account) saw it. dan then tweeted at the account asking for it, and it worked! smash mouth is now an official dannie, having tweeted orange for wad, and also offered the original demo for shrek to be used, saying it can maybe be for dan's next special. generally insane because dan has ofc always been a huge shrek fan as a part of his meme personality in the 2010s, even dressing up as him for a calendar

[mrsundays]

TADC GANG REDESIGN

I finally finished the redesigns. It took me a long time, but they are done, and that's all that matters. Now I'll proceed to talk about each of them because if I don't, I'll implode.

I approached the designs with the idea of not straying too far from the original designs, although I can't deny that I went a bit overboard with Pomni's design.

AND NO, THEY HAVE NOTHING UNDER THOSE CLOTHES, ZERO, ABSOLUTE VOID, LITERALLY LIKE A BARBIE OR KEN. But who knows, maybe one day I'll wake up feeling crazy, ahem.

POMNI:

She has undergone the most changes compared to her original design, the most noticeable being the hat. The reason is simple; I find it funny that the hat itself is larger than Pomni, making her look even smaller than she already is, which brings me to the other change.

This Pomni is much smaller than the original, reaching only to Ragatha's shoulders compared to the redesign, which barely reaches her waist.

The third change is the suit. The only things I kept were the pattern and colors, along with the bells on her torso. I liked the idea of giving her a design that constantly makes her appear smaller than she is, with only her head and forearms visible. Now she wears a "tunic" that also serves as a small skirt. In addition, her sleeves and pants are now loose, not to mention a more prominent "collar."

Finally, the pupils - one is red, and the other is blue, both accompanied by black. I don't have many reasons for this; I just liked how the black looked in her pupils when I sketched it, so I decided to keep it in the final design.

Now, a few details or ideas I have:

The bells on her suit make little sounds when she moves. They're not very loud, but somewhat annoying.

Pomni remains just as nervous and anxious, but now a bit more aggressive and impulsive. Why? Who knows.

During the first few weeks at the circus, she develops an intense fear of physical contact. Not only because of the strange sensation her own skin gives her but also due to other events that I can't talk about yet.

She's quite elusive, like a cartoon mouse. This is the only reason she can land punches on Jax without him expecting them.

RAGATHA:

SHE'S THE SAME, SHE'S THE SAME—There are only a few changes. To be honest, I really like the original design, and I didn't feel the need to change much. So, I decided to add a few more things because I enjoy adding silly details that end up saturating things, haha.

The most noticeable change is the white apron. Now it has certain seams all around her body, from her arms to her face, including her neck. Lastly, a small bag hangs behind her with all the tools a seamstress needs, out of necessity, like herself.

Other than that, there are no other significant changes to her design.

Now, with the little details/ideas:

Originally, she was slimmer, but after a small adventure in the circus, she discovered that firstly, she had polyester fiber filling, and secondly, if she added a bit more filling to her arms, she gained more strength.

Yes, she has the kitchen knife/machete, not just to scare a certain rabbit but also to cook meals sometimes with Bubble, the meals they eat after their adventures, with all the affection a ragdoll can give.

She once tried, along with Gangle, to make clothes for Zooble. It didn't turn out well...

Currently, she is the second-longest-serving person in the circus, only surpassed by Kinger. That's why Jax sometimes calls her grandma.

GANGLE:

Same as with Ragatha, her red ribbons and mask are intact, with the only additions being the French beret befitting an artist of her caliber and a small cape that covers the top part of her ribbons. I don't have much else to say; I didn't have many issues designing her—it was just something I thought fit perfectly with her personality.

Little Ideas :D :

As the entire fandom agrees, she's an artist and probably watched a lot of anime before ending up in the circus. Yes, she has one of those pillows with a character printed on it in her room.

Every now and then, she draws the circus members, including Jax, and gives them as gifts. Although she has currently put this practice aside due to recent abstractions...

She has been in the circus for less time than Jax, and despite everything that has happened, she has been enjoying her time in the circus more than she expected.

She can take any form with her ribbons as long as they remain connected to her mask.

Pomni asked her to teach her how to draw. The reason wasn't given, but Gangle gladly accepted.

JAX:

The purple rabbit, yes, he was a bit more complicated. Originally, I had the idea of giving him a shirt with a vest—a contrast between formal wear and his asshole attitude. However, I ended up discarding that idea and decided to go for a 60s fashion style.

The beret was something I seriously considered almost at the end of his design, and at least in my opinion, I think it works well with the rest of his clothing. I had to keep the jumpsuit; it was too characteristic, so I had to work around that piece, leading to the integration of the turtleneck sweater.

And finally, I made him furrier, and yes, he has a tail—a fluffy tail that he doesn't let anyone touch.

Now, you know what's coming:

See that pocket on his jumpsuit? It serves as a hammer space, so if he wanted to, he could store something comically huge there.

He's the best at carnival shooting games. No one has managed to beat him even once. The only one who used to give him competition was Kaufmo.

Don't tell anyone, but he has Gangle's drawing saved. He thinks it's a cute detail, but no one can find out, okay?

Before Kinger's wife's abstraction, he used to play chess with him or accompany him on bug-hunting missions, mainly with the goal of finding one to bother Ragatha.

Once, Zooble called him a furry. Jax locked himself in his room for three days because of that comment.

ZOOBLE:

Zooble… was the main reason I took so long with this. I spent days trying to think of any changes, anything—giving them clothes, didn't like the idea; maybe changing their form, nope; a total redesign… no. And so, I was stuck for days until I decided to change absolutely nothing. They're perfect as they are.

But, but, but in the end, I made a few small changes. I decided to play with the idea that Zooble is a toy with removable parts, and none of the parts are from the same toy brand; some aren't even made of the same material, with their right arm being the prime example, a ragdoll arm with filling, something similar to Ragatha.

Also, now they have a built-in voice box in their torso. You just have to pull that light blue thing on their chest, and you'll hear a phrase that varies between "I love you," "You're the best," and "Friends forever."

I won't repeat myself with this, huh:

They were the one who had been in the circus for the shortest time before Pomni's arrival.

The limbs they have now are not the original ones; it took some time for them to find a combination that was comfortable to move with.

They strangle Jax at least twice a week; it has become a habit.

They dislike the lake, mainly because they don't have aquatic parts, making swimming very difficult for them. Plus, they have lost some parts at the bottom of the lake. Caine returned them, but something tells them that the ringmaster gave them duplicates.

KINGER:

He's perfect, simply that. His original design, despite being simple, I think is one of the best in the series. But I had to do something, so I decided to add two very small things.

First, a ring. No need to explain; I think it's quite obvious what it refers to.

And second, a belt to highlight the excellent figure he has, even if that belt isn't his…

Don't bug me, you already know what's coming:

Sometimes, he hums a song when lost in his thoughts, but it seems like some parts of the melody are missing.

He has managed to create a small encyclopedia with data on all the bugs he has captured, even with drawings made by Gangle at Kinger's request.

He knows what you are.

He takes long walks around the lake on his days off, perhaps in an attempt to revive memories of a better time, although he says he does it in search of an aquatic specimen to add to his collection.

Sometimes, Caine challenges him to an arm wrestling competition. Oddly enough, he effortlessly manages to beat the AI.

[snow-143]

Water Coloured Tears | Jeon Jungkook

five- mommy’s boy (0.8k words)

'TAEEEEE. YOU BETTER GET YOUR ARSE UP AND READY TO LEAVE IN THE NEXT 5 MINUTES OR I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL SMOTHER YOU WITH THAT MONSTOSITY OF A TEDDY YOU SPOON EVERY NIGHT.' A muffled groan is all I receive in response.

I grab a slider on my way to his room, and very gracefully dive right onto of his barely conscious form. I find far too much amusement in the screech he lets out, although I'm sure the rest of the building doesn't. 

'Jesus Christ are you trying to kill me? How does someone so small weigh so much?'

His complaints are met with the slider being flung at his head. 'We're gonna be late, sunshine.'

Groggily he rubs his sleep ridden eyes, 'Ughhh, how's it Monday already.' 

Snorting at him I stand up from his bed, 'Just hurry up will you? Wouldn't want you to miss out on the honour of a two hour lecture with my company.' 

'Okay, but doesn't laying in bed with me cuddling you all morning sound soooo much better?'  He's smirking at me now.

'Don't flatter yourself, anyway, both you and me know that you always end up as the little spoon.' 

Huffing he finally stands up, 'You're worse than my mother.' 

'What, does your mother spoon you too?'

'First of all, so what if she does, my mother loves me very much. Secondly, I meant your nagging.' 

'AWWWW someone's a mommy's boy.' I squish his puffy morning cheeks. ' And someone's got to be the responsible roommate, and that's certainly not you. You're basically an overgrown puppy.' 

'At least I'm cute. You're like a vicious black cat.' It's said as an insult but I beam at him.

'I love cats! Anyway, stop distracting me! I will dress you myself and drag you out of that door if I have to.'

'You know, if you wanted to get me naked you could just say that.' And there's that smirk again.

'Sorry to break it to you, but blondes aren't my type.' Ruffling his hair, I turn around to leave his room. 'Oh, and if you aren't ready in at least 3 minutes I'm leaving without you and telling the whole class you have explosive diarrhoea.'

I hear his chuckle from the hallway before he calls out, 'Yes, ma'am.'

-----------

'Well that was excruciating.' The lecture has just ended and I'm 99.9% sure everyone feels like the life has been sucked out of them.

'I swear Mr Chen enjoys making his students miserable. There's no other reason why he'd do this.' Laughing at Tae's reply I ask if he's up for our usual Monday brunch. We both have a gap before our next lesson so it's become kind of a tradition.

I'm met with a guilty smile, 'About that..'

'Tae. Do not tell me you're bailing on our tradition.'

'I'm sorry, but my next period was cancelled and I sort of have this thing.'

'What thing?' My face defiantly resembles the sus emoji right now.

'A date? I think?' 

'You're ditching me for a date and weren't even gonna tell me? I'm wounded. What happened to bros before hoes?' Clutching my chest I act as if I'm physically in pain. 

'I swear she means nothing to be. You're still my one and only, sweety pie.' We gaze into each others eyes for what feels like an eternity, both with a serious expression painted on. He breaks first, bursting out into laughter but I follow not long after. The looks we get are humbling but whenever I'm with Tae I cant seem to care.

'Have fun on your date. You better tell me every detail when you get back tomorrow.'

'Hey, have some faith in me I don't always hook up with them on the first date.' Giving him a sceptical look, I shake my head.

'Goodbye, Taehyung. And for the love of God use protection. No one wants a mini Tae running around, you cause enough chaos as it is.' 

'At least I get some action, you're just sexually frustrated all the time.' 

I slap him on the arm before shooing him off.

Great, now I have an hour to kill before I have my art class. With no other than Jeon Jungkook. This project is going to be the death of me. I've went from having to see him twice a week, every Monday and Friday, to having to actually interact with him three times a week.

We decided that we should meet every Wednesday as well as the art classes, mostly to take the photos and discuss how were getting on. Then during the actual class we can focus on making the art. 

Luckily, I brought a book with me to fill up this hour.

prev | m.list | next

—————

a/n: no jk in this one unfortunately however roommate tae content!

[galactic-glamour-girl-posts]

All of Rosalina's Mario Kart Tour Variants Ranked

Rosalina got a lot of variants in this game, not including her base form or Baby Rosalina, she has nine. Mario and Peach I believe are the only other characters in the game that have more variants than her (unless you count all the Yoshi/Shy Guy/Toad colours, but those are technically different characters). Although this is unsurprising given that she's a fan favourite.

Not including base Rosalina or base Baby Rosalina, I'm gonna rank each of her variants. I'll rank these based on creativity, looks, and whether they fit Rosalina as a character in both look and purpose.

Last Place: Tanooki

This variant isn't outright terrible, I don't think Rosalina has a single bad variant, but this one is firmly in last place.

For one, it's not very creative. It's not a new, unique design, it's a powerup form taken from a main series game. Secondly, it looks kinda silly on her. Goofier characters like Mario, Luigi, or even Peach can pull off a look like this, but given that Rosalina is a more serious character, outfits like this are kinda awkward on her. Besides, she can already fly so it's not like she'd ever canonically need this powerup anyway.

Cat

Again, it looks kinda silly on her, but I like that it's black (with a slight blue tint) instead of aqua blue. Darker colours suit Rosalina, and honestly just make her look cool...as cool as she can look in a cat suit anyway.

Fire

Like the Tanooki and Cat suits, it's not very creative as an idea given that it's just a powerup form (I'd argue it's even less creative than them design-wise since they just make her dress and earrings red). Unlike the Tanooki and Cat suits, however, she at least doesn't look silly wearing it.

Fun (but unnecessary...funnecessary) fact, I used to nickname her Fire Form "Mrs Claus" when I played as her in 3D World as a kid because of the colour scheme.

Chef

It's not badly designed or anything, I just don't think a chef outfit suits her. I don't think she'd dress up to cook, it seems a bit too playful for her to do. Maybe it's the hat or something, the outfit looks a little too cutesy for her. I think an outfit like this fits Peach more, being a fashionista (and baking) is more her thing. Oh well, at least it's an original design.

Volendam

It's Rosalina in a traditional Volendam costume. I could see her gardening in this, wanting to learn about and experience some culture. Although I can't give it a lot of points for creativity, given it's based on real life outfits, it is pretty cool that this variant incorporates real Netherlandish culture. Otherwise...it's OK.

Aurora

I know people love this one, it seems to be the fan favourite costume of hers from this game. I agree that it's pretty, but I think it's slightly overdesigned. I'm also not sure when she'd ever wear it? To see an aurora? I know she loves space, but again, I don't see her dressing up just for that, especially something so intricate. Maybe she'd wear it to a fancy party, but...would her usual royal gown not do? Her main outfit is noticeably looser and a little more simple than Peach and Daisy's, being more of a nightgown. This fits her since Rosalina is meant to be a character that is cold of the outsight yet offers warm, motherly comfort, hence her outfit is reminiscent of nightwear, something comfortable to sleep in.

Swimwear

Iiiiiiiiiit's a beach outfit!

Yep.

It's an original design. Colour scheme fits. It's not overdesigned. It seems like something she'd wear while swimming or on holiday (maybe in Beach Bowl Galaxy?) The flower is a cute touch. I like that it shows less skin than Peach and Daisy's swimwear outfits (I'm not sl*t-shaming, this actually happens a lot, I made a post about it).

This variant's nice...next.

Detective

Yep, it's this high! Why? Well one, Rosalina dressing up as a child makes more sense than her doing it as an adult (not that adults can't enjoy dressing up, I just don't think it suits Rosalina as a character).

Two, I also like that the magnifying glass resembles her future wand and brooch. Very clever design choice.

Three, and most of all, I like what this variant says about her character. I like that this outfit emphasises her brain. I like the idea of her pretending to be a detective as a child, it's fitting given how wise she'd grow up to be, and implies that she was a precocious young girl. I think this was intentional, given that they doe something similar with Baby Peach. They give her a Cherub/Cupid variant, which fits how loving Peach would grow up to be. Design-wise it could be more creative, but I really like the concept.

First Place: Halloween

This outfit has everything I could look for in a Rosalina variant!

Design wise, I like the darker colours (the purple not only goes nicely with her fingernails, but is also reminiscent of the inside of her bedroom) and although it could look more distinct from her main outfit, it's different enough so that it's doesn't seem lazy (shorter sleeves, it covers her shoulders, etc.) The little blue bow is cute but not too cute whilst adding some blue to the outfit, making it fit her all the more.

This variant is meant to be a Halloween outfit, and sure Rosalina herself wouldn't go trick-or-treating, but I absolutely could see her taking the Lumas to go trick-or-treating on Earth. You can't see whilst she's front-facing, but the back of her render has large blue stitching, making it look homemade, and the use of her wand supports that idea. I love how this outfits utilizes her wand, using it to complete a witch outfit is both fitting and creative! Also, Rosalina built most of the Comet Observatory herself, so it's easy to believe she'd make a pretty good DIY costume.

So yeah. It looks good, it's original to Mario Kart Tour, it's look and purpose fit Rosalina as a character, and utilizing her wand to complete the costume was a creative choice. All done on their first try (this was Rosalina's first alternative outfit in the game).

I guess they peaked at the start!

[papirouge]

Okay, as an autistic guy, I don't fully understand how you are radical feminism / TERF but not pro abortion

Like, aren't y'all always saying that you want men to die? And the burden of patriarchy and boyhood or how it's sexist to be forced to caretaker or whatever?

Aren't abortion like, things that can help reach you guys goal?

Also please don't use the r-slur next time

First of all, I don't take orders from randoms of the internet popping in my inbox. If a statement is retarded then it is retarded regardless of someone's intelligence/mental capability. If you're taking it personally, that's your problem.

Secondly, who's the "you" you're talking about when you say "y'all want men to die"? Although I never identified myself as a radfem, I've orbitted around them long enough to know that there are straight radfem who literally get shit for not entertaining the same hatred as separatists who are those are into this KAM (= kill all men) lunacy.

Those straight radfem do seek to male companionship and potentially a family so it's ridiculous to paint radical feminism as a movement actively seeking to eradicate malehood. Those straight radfem get shit in by kam radfem separatists for not wanting men dead so it's crazy that you're painting radical feminism as a monolith when there are so many internal conflicts and opinions lol Pro life radfem are definitely a thing.

Actually, trying to define radical feminism centering male fate is very patriarchy-oriented, and shows how little knowledge you have about radical feminism.

And anyone having a remote idea of what's laying behind abortion culture knows that it's absolutely misogynist. Abortion treats women's body like a commodity (abortion affects the body and female's fecondity), and sustains the idea that a woman with children is a problem (don't you find interesting that companies are paying for their employees abortion? "eat the rich" abortionists are clowns lol). Instead of building a society more accomodating for mothers and their family, we simply tell them they should've rather not having kids altogether. Pro abortionisys barely adress the struggle (poor) single mother face in society, because the only solution they shove is abortion, and they go blind about any other situation where women chose to keep their child. However pro life groups do offer support and ressources for those mother to become.

Pro life groups are more feminists than any pro abortion radical feminist thinking a woman is only free if she has the right to kill their offspring. Murder isn't freedom, and it's highkey offensive that this narrative is recklessly being spread around in pro abortion circles. If your freedom relies on harming or killing someone, you're a psychopath. Period.

Also have you ever considered that abortion also kills female fetus and that obsessively defending it despite acknowledging this is also misogynist ? I've addressed several times the cognitive dissonance of radfem weeping about China's one child policy and the systemic abortion of young girls, but didn't care about their local abortion clinic aborting female fetus en masse. Their only defense was "bUt tHey Don'T sYstEmiCaLlY tArgEttT fEmAle fEtUse" as if it changed anything about female fetus being killed. 🙄 Context might be different, the result remains the same. It's just a silly cope out.

Oh I won't even begin with planned Parenthood accepting donation to kill black babies which automatically puts any one defending this company as an ennemy since I'm a Black woman🤷🏾��♀️

[filmtexts]

Maestro

Okay, I admit that this pun was hard to resist. With his latest film Maestro, writer-producer-director-star Bradley Cooper is back in "the shallow now.” How did he get there?

Flashback to five years ago. The pre-release hype of Cooper’s directorial debut A Star Is Born didn’t pass me by. I had, perhaps as a snap judgement, not placed my the film on my must-see list. First, while acknowledging Bradley Cooper’s respectable work in films such as Silver Linings Playbook and American Hustle, I don’t avidly follow him like other actors whose presence in even otherwise less remarkable movies are a tipping point to watch them.

Secondly, Cooper and Lady Gaga didn’t appear to be a surefire match. Gaga herself didn’t elicit doubt. While not a fan, I can see why her “little monsters” are so devoted and her musical talent and also acting ability (award-winning turn in one full season of American Horror Story) are undisputed. Yet somehow, the Cooper-Gaga pairing seemed neither no-brainer, nor so weird it’s inspired, just a tad calculated.

Lastly, this is the fourth version (third with songs) of showbiz melodrama A Star Is Born, updating the music to cater to the tastes of a contemporary 55+ audience which in its youth preferred The Eagles and Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young to The Ramones and The Clash. (Likely over Young and DEVO, or even Pearl Jam, too.) The previous version in 1976 with Barbra Streisand and Kris Kristofferson begat the chart-topping and Oscar-winning song “Evergreen”. Otherwise, the 1970s take was less successful than George Cukor’s radical 1954 reboot (avant la lettre). He reimagined the acclaimed drama from 1937 as a dazzling Hollywood Golden Age musical. The showstopping numbers (motivated as part of a film or stage show within the film) were Judy Garland’s most iconic performances since Wizard of Oz. And in contrast, “offstage” scenes of the doomed central love affair became even more heartwrenching. This ‘revealed’ the disconnect between dream factory and ‘real life’ while such meta-narratives then became another popular Hollywood trope. Cukor and Garland created a classic. Thus, yet another A Star Is Born seemed like diminishing returns.

Then one day, as fate had it, I needed to kill time during a film trade show and A Star Is Born screening filled the empty slot. Low expectations yielded to surprised, genuine delight. Cooper had pulled off a well-crafted and entertaining film. While it would be silly to say “a star is born” in reference to Gaga, her natural and intelligent performance put her on the table for more acting gigs. (In House of Gucci, she was the saving grace.) And of course, there’s ”Shallow,” perhaps more an evergreen than that earlier song of the same name.

So my expectations had risen by the time I first heard about Cooper’s next outing as director-producer-writer-star: Maestro, a biopic about Leonard Bernstein. The legendary composer and conductor’s work and life are a motherlode: innovations in the stage and screen musical, a new approach to symphonic musical performance, making classical music accessible for young people (and generally less elitist), controversial support of progressive causes and a complex private life. The trailer showcased the film’s bold style, alternating between chiaroscuro black and white and sunny, slightly faded color. It also centered upon a lovely romantic moment: Bernstein and his wife Felicia Montealegre (Carey Mulligan) sitting, first as young lovers, then an older married couple, back to back in a park, trying to guess a number the other is thinking of.

The trailer turned out to be a much more satisfying experience than the film itself, although the focus on the relationship foreshadowed things to come. Maestro’s plot boils down to this: how saintly Felicia put up with Lenny’s infidelity with men, until she didn’t anymore. On The Town? A few shots of dancing extras in sailor suits. West Side Story? Mentioned in passing by Felicia as a Romeo and Juliet update, then a few bars of The Prologue play later in the film. It’s supposed to be some sort of “comment” but feels random. Bernstein’s overall impact on music composition, performance and education? If it all, told, not shown and sidelined by Bernstein feeling intermittantly unfulfilled as a conductor and struggling with a dryspell as a composer.

It is Bernstein’s bisexuality that drives the narrative forward. If handled more skillfully, this could have provided insight into the acceptance of homosexuality during the depicted era and the dynamics of polyamorous relationships. Instead, scenes like Felicia forcing Lenny to lie to their daughter when she asks about persistent rumors are poorly written and have little resonance within the story as a whole. We are left in the dark about Lenny’s obliviousness to Felicia’s pain everytime she becomes aware of a new male lover: does he take his unwavering love of Felicia for granted, regardless of other sexual encounters or is he just a cad? After Felicia’s death, Lenny sternly but fairly critiques a male student’s conducting during rehearsal, then cut to them joyously dancing in a club. This image suggests Lenny can separate work and pleasure (no Tár-like abuse of power here). But does this also imply that Felicia’s absence might have set him free (although he “misses her terribly”)? The exploration of Bernstein’s sexuality remains sketchy.

Maestro also fails to spark any passion or curiosity about Bernstein’s music, something that other deeply flawed biopics at least managed. Instead, much screentime is devoted out to Bernstein getting his head around conducting Gustav Mahler’s "Symphony No. 2 in C Minor." No doubt, this was a milestone of Bernstein’s career. But making this a central setpiece and downplaying his return to composition after the aforementioned personal crisis about being “merely” a conductor doesn’t truly do service to the diverse talents Bernstein craved acknowledgment for.

(Musical) biopics are hard to do really well. Many are jerry-built, held together only by the appeal of the portrayed artist and a chameleon-like lead performance. Bohemian Rhapsody, for example, coasts on the appeal of Freddie Mercury and Queen alone, despite accolades for the weakest elements: Rami Malek’s performance and the inexplicably Oscar-winning editing (this video essay presents a convincing case. The film’s editor John Ottman has since defended himself with the film’s turbulent production history.) The more interesting ones often display unconventional choices. Multiple actors (including Cate Blanchett) played Bob Dylan in Todd Haynes’ I’m Not Here. Judy (Rupert Goold) and Nico ‘88 (Susanna Nicchiarelli) eschewed the sweeping career arc to focus on the respective singers’ final years, not sensationalist, but restoring some dignity. Many other biopics beg the question, why not watch a documentary with footage of the real artist instead?

As it doesn’t want to go the boilerplate biopic route, Maestro is all the more frustrating. There are many ideas floating around. Sadly, they often fall flat. The use of different 35mm black and white and color film stocks and aspect ratios to depict the various time periods has become overused. The black and white scenes of Felicia and Lenny’s early courtship at one point briefly slide into a musical-style dance/dream sequence, but the execution remains half-baked. Using snatches of Bernstein’s compositions to comment the story sounds good on paper. On screen, the fragments are often too short to really register.

Misfire stylistic choices aside, Maestro is handsomely mounted. The cinematography by Matthew Libatique (who also shot A Star Is Born) is gorgeous, not just the aforementioned use of color but also unusual, evocative camera angles. As for the elephant in the room, Bradley Cooper’s mimicry is uncanny, aided (not only) by convincing prosthetics (the “Jewface” accusations are somewhat unfair; cinematic representation will nevertheless generally remain an issue). Carey Mulligan makes the best of a role that devolves from incandescent to long-suffering. Aside from them, other roles like the Bernstein children or Lenny’s male lovers are underwritten. (Comedienne-actress Sarah Silverman is wasted as Lenny's sister.) With a hot mess of a screenplay at the film’s core, the opulent production values cannot conceal that Cooper’s reach exceeds his grasp. Let’s hope he finds his way out of the shallow for film number three.

[eyesteeth]

explanation and bonuses under the cut

so this puppy has been kicking around my brain since around september of last year, and i figured that hey, since Val’s pretty much guaranteed to do something big next episode, might as well do a drawing of her that isn’t a loose, unfinished sketch. very glad to finally get this one out of my brain and onto the page.

symbolisms

the box: there are two parts to this.

firstly, although Val has begun to consider herself a god, she’s still got those limitations of flesh on her. whatever recompense she has planned for the unjustly killed, she may not be able to carry it out without her own death.

secondly, lab rat.

the boot: three parts here! wahoo

the way she’s gripping the boot resembles the way someone holds a gun. there’s a weapon here, but it’s just her.

in addition, boots have a whole bunch of symbolism inherent to them, licking the boot, the Brave New World visual of a boot stomping on a face forever, and the boots theory of inequality, all of which i think suit Val well.

however, the primary reason for this is the bootstrap paradox - also known as the grandfather paradox, caused by removing an event that caused the removal to occur in the first place. given the inconsistencies in Val’s powers, she has the potential to create such a paradox, and so it is both a threat and acknowledged danger - either a way to say “don’t test me, i could send us all back to the stone age”, or a looming possibility if her good intentions go awry, as such intentions are often want to do.

the eye: just a small and silly thing :}

Val’s core shape in my brain is a “clipped rectangle”, or to use a visual that probably makes more sense, the shape a black marker makes when redacting text. as a result, she has that shape as the light in her eye, pressing down to the pupil. yeouch!!

yes i have overthought things to that degree shoosh

and then she has little halos for emphasis but they arent the nice round halos we’ve come to know and love they’re all warped and pointy because she’s an aberration.

anyway here for funsies i’ve turned some of the layers off

very epic. so burgundy. much val.

anyways. thanks for taking this little peek into my silly mind!!

recompense, within limitation

[writingwithcolor]

One of my OC is a brown woman (let’s call her Evi, to make things simpler) in a fantasy world. Before the beginning of the story, she is cursed to “loose her colors”: in practice it means her skin, hair and eyes completely loose pigmentation, becoming paper white (literally white, as in #ffffff). Her true aspect is revealed later in the story, but I fear some people might interpret her change as black-facing since her heritage wasn’t manifest at first. There are other BIPOC characters that interact with Evi, however many of them appear when she is still afflicted by the curse. Moreover, the people around Evi can smell something’s off, so the reason behind her unnatural complexion is constantly discussed; discovering why she is so pale is one of the “mysteries” the other characters try to solve. Since I’m not a BIPOC, I am afraid this situation might be perceived as highly problematic. There are of course many reasons why Evi got cursed, and why the curse involved her “colors”, but it would be redundant to explain them now since, by that point, the damage will be already done.

I wrote “brown women”, that was a mistake from my behalf. To be more specific, my OC is coded as a woman with Arabic descent and her culture is inspired by ancient Egypt.

Arab woman with Ancient Egyptian culture cursed to lose skin pigmentation

Before addressing your question, I would like to mention the first thing that jumped out at me about this ask: the nature of your character’s curse.

“her skin, hair and eyes completely lose pigmentation”

This, to me, reads as albinism. You may not know this, but albinism has long been associated with sorcery and evil in many cultures. By making it into a curse in your story, you are directly reinforcing a harmful trope which contributes to prejudices against people with albinism to this day. Mod Brei (a former WWC mod with albinism) touched on it in this post: Representation of Albinism

I recommend checking out the links included there to read up on the persecution of people with albinism and the negative portrayals of albinism in popular culture. You should also read through the albinism tag for more posts on the topic.

But even if you find a way to remove the curse/magic/evil connection, there are more issues with your premise.

“the people around Evi can smell something’s off, so the reason behind her unnatural complexion is constantly discussed”

First of all, calling her complexion “unnatural” is inaccurate and dehumanizing. There is nothing unnatural about having no pigmentation. It is literally a naturally occurring genetic variation within the human population.

Secondly, losing pigmentation doesn’t just have aesthetic consequences. Melanin has a biological function, which is to protect the eyes and skin from sunlight. Without it, your character is likely to experience sun damage and will need to take special precautions to protect herself. She may also experience some degree of visual impairment due to damage to her retina. Albinism is a disability, and that has implications for your character and her portrayal which require a lot more depth than just having her look a little different. You have to be prepared to engage with that and do the tremendous amount of work required to portray a disabled character accurately without falling into ableist tropes. The idea that disability is a curse in need of a cure is one of them.

Finally, as for your main concern:

“I fear some people might interpret her change as black-facing since her heritage wasn’t manifest at first.”

I think you mean brownface, since your character is Arab, not Black (although that in itself raises additional issues, as Colette discusses below). To me, this doesn’t read as brownface at all, because the character was never white to begin with. Skin pigmentation has nothing to do with heritage, and if the loss of pigmentation is enough to obfuscate your character’s heritage, there is probably something missing from the way you’re portraying her.

There are so many ways to indicate a character’s ethnic and cultural background without ever touching on the color of their skin, eyes, or hair. As Mod Brei pointed out in this post, race is not skin color and Black people with albinism still look Black. And then there are all the other aspects of cultural coding that go way beyond physical appearance, and which you need to include if you want your characterization to have depth: language, habits, upbringing, worldview, customs, modes of interacting with others, etc. If your coding is only skin-deep, it’s not enough.

-Niki

I agree with Niki that this curse sounds like albinism, so in this case “magical albinism” and you’re equating it to a curse and punishment, which has ableist implications. 

Include African people in your Ancient Egyptian setting

I’d like to address the Ancient Egyptian portions of your question, though.

“My OC is coded as a woman with Arabic descent and her culture is inspired by ancient Egypt.”

These origins sound like erasure of Black Ancient Egyptians. Egypt is in Africa. Black Egyptians existed and exist. 

The Continent of Africa on a traditional style map.

The Ancient Egyptians were primarily Black until conquest. It was once called Kemet (Kmt), meaning the Black land.

Aggressive anti-Black erasure by the media is why you associate “Arab” and sometimes even white people to Ancient Egypt only. In the same way America is seldom associated with its Indigenous peoples.

Yes, skin color and tones would vary (as it does among Black people) and the Egyptian popular was heavily mixed, particularly upon conquest. Still, there should be African people in your African setting too. Egyptians and Nubians. It feels like erasure to prioritize non-Africans in an Ancient Egyptian (see, African) setting.

Ultimately, it doesn’t matter so much as to what one thinks in regards to who Ancient Egypt “belongs to” or who was there first -- when it comes to writing a story set there, at least. Black people (of various skin tones and mixes) were there and existed in Ancient Egypt, so you should portray that. 

Consider this when you decide to equate Ancient Egypt to the conquerors only over its original people. I suggest researching further into Ancient Egypt.

Several Ancient Egyptian and Nubian images below. Including mummies 

Because it’s always an anti-black battle when once brings up this topic anywhere! 

Evidence from Blood Types

[Senegalese scholar Dr. Cheikh Anta Diop (1923-1986)] found that even after hundreds of years of intermixing with foreign invaders, the blood type of modern Egyptians is the “same group B as the populations of Western Africa on the Atlantic seaboard and not the A2 group characteristic of the white race prior to any crossbreeding.”

Maiherpri’s mummy, Mummy, hair intact, unwrapped in 1901. xxx

“In Maiherperi's tomb, a papyrus was found depicting him with literally "blackish" skin...Maiherperi was an Ancient Egyptian noble of Nubian origin buried in the Valley of the Kings.”

Are Nubians Egyptians?  

Nubians are descendants of an ancient African civilization as old as Egypt itself, which once presided over an empire and even ruled Egypt. Their historical homeland, often referred to as Nubia, stretches along the Nile covering present-day southern Egypt and northern Sudan.

xxx

King Akhenaten, wife to Queen Nefertiti 

He is likened to this person of the African diaspora for visual comparison (whose name I don’t know)

Queen Nefertiti

Somali supermodel Iman beside Queen Nefertiti, as they’re often linkened! This is her in Michael Jackson’s music video, Remember the Time)

Ethiopian supermodel Liya Kebede

Amenhotep III, Wife to Queen Tiye. Father to Akhenaten

Queen Tiye. including a reconstruction and her mummy. Wife to Amenhotep III and mother to King Akhenaten.

~Mod Colette

Ask published Nov 2021

[bang-tan-bitches]

Title: Beloved

Word Count: 17.4k

Rating: M

Genre: Drama/Thriller/Smut

Warnings: Yandere Behavior, Violence, Blood, Character Death, Emotional Manipulation, Hint of Dubious Consent, Unprotected Sex, Vaginal Fingering, Cream Pie, Oral Sex (Female Receiving), Mild Dirty Talk 

Pairing: Emperor!Yoongi X Reader

Summary: Court was just a game of politics after all. And you intended to win

Written By: Admin B

Note: This was entirely inspired by Daechwita and everyone should thank A for indulging my madness and encouraging me

“Are you even listening to me?”

 You jerk at the sound of your younger sister’s voice, the long carriage ride has made you sleepy. You glance over at her and give her an indulgent smile, “I’m sorry, darling. I can only listen to you wax poetic about his Imperial Highness’ esteemed looks for so long before I lose interest.”

You can’t help but laugh when Ara snaps her fan closed and tries to hit you with it, but you block it with your own fan.

“Stop or you’ll wrinkle your dress!” You giggle, “Then what will his majesty think of you?!”

She sits back in her seat, but you can see her eyes are shining with laughter. She looks positively breathtaking in her pale pink ceremonial dress. Her hair is beautifully styled with pearls and ribbons laced throughout. Her maids really made her as eye catching as possible. When the decree was first announced that all single ladies of marriageable age were invited to the palace on behalf of the imperial princess to find a bride for his majesty, you were concerned. You know Ara had fallen hopelessly in love with the emperor the one and only time she saw him, having begged father to take her to court with him two years prior. Ever since then she had this fairy tale dream in her head that they were meant to be together and you were terribly afraid of her getting hurt. 

“He really is beautiful,” her eyes are dreamy as she glances out the carriage window, “did I tell you how his hair is so pale that it practically shines like moonlight?”

“Yes, yes,” the sarcasm clear in your voice, “He is the most handsome and benevolent ruler our land has ever seen!” 

“He is,” you sister insists, “even with the scar!”

“He has a scar? I thought that was just a rumor.” You look out the carriage window to see how far you are from the palace. The ride seemed longer than usual, but that could have just been your boredom with the topic. You had no interest in politics - not that that had stopped your father from teaching you - and avoided going to court as much as possible. You had never even been in the presence of the emperor or the imperial princess. Ara had no interest in politics either, but that didn’t stop her dreams of becoming Empress.

“Oh! It’s not a rumor!” Your sister straightens her posture, “There’s a scar that covers his right eye! He got it during the great war when he was still the crown prince.”

“Why didn’t he -”

“Why didn’t he have the Imperial healers treat him and remove the scar?” Your sister cuts you off before you can finish your question, “He wanted a reminder to never show leniency. He was betrayed by some of his own men that weren’t loyal to the crown. He slaughtered not only the betrayers, but also their entire families.”

You furrow your brows and fix the long sleeves of your ceremonial dress, uncomfortable with the emperor’s apparent brutality, “Sounds cruel.”

“It’s not cruel. He had to ensure that no one would try to get revenge. He was protecting our kingdom from those that would try to take it!”

“Of course, of course,” you placate your sister and roll your eyes at her fervent defense of his highness.

“Don’t roll your eyes, I’m terribly sorry everyone can’t be as noble as your dear Namjoon.”

You frown, “First of all, he is Lord Kim and he deserves your respect. Secondly, he isn’t my dear anything. Nothing has been finalized. There has only been talk of marriage, but no contracts are in place.”

Ara scoffs, “Everyone knows he absolutely adores you. His eyes get all big and his cheeks turn bright pink whenever he sees you.”

You smile wistfully and look down at your lap, “He is rather adorable.”

“Mmmhmm and if it was up to him you would already be married and probably with child.”

“Ara, it is impolite to discuss such things.” You scold gently, “What if someone overheard you?”

“Who?” Ara dramatically looks around the carriage before resting back against her seat, “Who can possibly hear us? There is only me and you in this carriage. No one is going to hear us.”

“Still, you need to be appropriate, you cannot slip up at the palace.”

You both sit in silence for a moment, Ara with closed eyes gently fanning herself while you contemplate how to bring up what’s been weighing heavily on your mind. Your younger sister was spoiled and had always gotten her way, even you were guilty of indulging her every whim. You were terribly worried that she would not adjust to court life well. Your understanding was that the women could be even more vicious than the men and you needed to prepare her.

You chew your lip before deciding to broach the delicate topic, “I heard another rumor about your emperor.”

“Mmm… what’s that?” Ara opens one eye to look at you.

“I heard,” you lean forward and lower your voice, “that his harem is… extensive.”

Ara pouts adorably, “It is. Apparently he has over 300 concubines.”

“300? That has to be an exaggeration. No man would want 300 concubines. Although,” you continue quietly, “he is the emperor and a large harem would show off his wealth and power. Does he have a favorite among them?”

“Ugh,” you watch Ara’s eyes darken in anger, “Concubine Nam In-Suk. She is his favored concubine and I heard the only reason she wasn’t named his empress is because Imperial Princess Min would not allow it.”

“Why would the emperor care what his elder sister thinks?” You already know the answers to all these questions, but you hope that asking them will help Ara realize what she needs to do to secure her place as empress. The carriage starts to slow, you were almost to the palace and wouldn’t have much time alone to prepare her going forward and no time alone once you’d arrived.

“She is his advisor and closest confidant. He trusts her with everything.”

“Ara,” you grab your sister’s hand and give her a meaningful look, “It is very important that you gain the favor of Imperial Princess Min. If you have her blessing, you will not be denied. Most of the silly girls will be striving for Emperor Min’s attention, not realizing that the imperial princess is making the final choice.”

Ara nods her head, determined. “I will gain her favor.”

“Also,” you know she will hate what you are about to suggest, but it has to be done, “You need to become friendly with Concubine Nam.”

“Never!” Ara gasps and tries to pull away, “As soon as I’m chosen as empress I will make him disband his harem!”

“Ara, you cannot!” You lean close and let the severity of your demand bleed into your tone, “You must become friendly and show you are not a threat.” 

“But I am a threat…” she pushes her lip out in a pout. 

You squeeze her hand, “I know, darling. But court politics are not that different from bedroom politics. He will not get rid of his harem just because you demand it. If Concubine Nam thinks she can manipulate and play you, she will be less of a threat. She has his ear and his favor. Let them think you are stupid little girl with stars in her eyes. It will bend them to your will.”

 “But,” Ara’s voice is quiet, “I want him to love only me.”

“Oh my beloved Ara,” you hold her close to you, “these things take time. Once you bed him and provide an heir, you will secure your place at his side. He will have to love and cherish only you. How could he not?”

Her smile is blinding when the carriage stops outside the palace gates. 

-0-0-0-

“Relax,” you whisper, “you are the most beautiful lady here. You have nothing to fear.”

Ara releases her bottom lip and nods subtly. When you had arrived at the palace earlier that day, you were welcomed inside to a large hall filled with other single young ladies and their chaperones, all from the most prominent families in the kingdom. Imperial Princess Min herself greeted everyone and announced that a welcome banquet would be held that evening. You were then ushered to your rooms where you could refresh yourselves before the evening. The Daisy Courtyard would serve as your temporary home for the next few weeks. It was a smaller courtyard, but it was beautiful and secluded and you were thankful to learn that it was nowhere near the concubine courtyard. 

It was almost impossible to remember how quiet the courtyard was now. 

Now, in the palace banquet room awaiting the arrival of the emperor for what felt like hours with the crowd growing more restless by the minute, you dearly missed the seclusion. Imperial Princess Min was present, drinking wine and enjoying the performance of the dancers brought in for entertainment. If she was upset with the late arrival of her brother, her face did not show it.

The music abruptly stops and everyone quiets down. The large golden doors at the back of the room are opened and an imperial servant steps in, placing their fisted hand over their heart, they bow and announce, “His Royal Highness, Emperor Min Yoongi, 37th Emperor of the Min Dynasty.”

Everyone immediately bows, giving reverence to the Emperor. He is dressed in the darkest black with gold dangling from his ears, neck, and fingers.  His blond hair is pulled up into a high topknot and a black headband is across his forehead. 

You notice a beautiful woman trailing a few steps behind him. She is covered in diamonds. They glitter from her shiny black hair down to the long train of her bright purple ceremonial dress. The dress itself is decorated in patterns of golden tigers, matching the pattern of the emperor’s black robe.

By the clenching of Ara’s hands, you realize that this must be Concubine Nam. You discreetly nudge your sister and mouth for her to relax. 

The emperor takes his seat on his golden dragon throne, while his favored concubine sits obediently at his feet. His presence is overpowering and you can feel his displeasure radiating throughout the room.  

“So… I was told that one of you will be this emperor’s bride and empress consort.” Emperor Min’s voice is deep and controlled, but the underlying fury is unmistakable. You can feel his eyes trail over the room, “Do you really think that one of you will enrapture this emperor? Do you truly believe one of you will become my chosen?”

Everyone is deathly silent, afraid of angering his highness even more. You can feel his penetrating gaze stop on you. You did not dare look upon the face of the emperor. You knew the rules of the court. You keep your eyes lowered and wait for his eyes to move past you. 

They don’t.

You can still feel him staring at you and after several silent minutes you hesitantly look up and meet his eyes. You feel your breath catch in your throat. He is startlingly beautiful. His features are delicate but his scar provides him a hint of roguishness that accentuates his already extraordinary beauty. 

His gaze is intense and you can feel his angry aura disappear to something unreadable. His dark eyes are burning with something as a devilishly handsome smile spreads across his face.

You quickly lower your eyes and ignore the chill down your spine and the heat spreading across your face. You now understand how your sister could be so enraptured with one look. 

The emperor laughs, startling you into looking again. He’s staring at his sister and smiling. You can see Concubine Nam’s face screwed up, but staring at the floor. You look away quickly before he can feel your stare. His voice is filled with warmth and something else, something unsettling, “Maybe this emperor will finally meet his bride amongst the ladies here today. Rise and enjoy the welcome feast.”

Immediately servants present platters of food to the various tables and the music starts again. You ignore the burning gaze you feel on you and direct your attention to Ara.

“Make sure you eat. You have to be strong if you plan to carry the next heir of the kingdom.” You add more food to her plate.

“Yes, yes,” Ara giggles and pushes your hand away, “I could feel him staring in our direction. Did you feel it too?”

You force a smile, “Of course. How could he not stare at you. I told you that you were the most beautiful lady here.”

When it’s your turn to introduce yourselves to the royal family, you make sure to keep your head low and only make eye contact with Imperial Princess Min once you’re allowed to rise. Next to you, your sister does the same, following your example, even as you feel the hot eyes of the emperor on you once again. Ara pays a pretty compliment to the Princess, and you smile proudly when the Princess laughs delightedly and asks for your names. 

“Oh, I remember you. And your father.” Princess Min says, a delicate finger resting on her bottom lip. She shares a look with her brother and you can feel the hateful eyes of Concubine Nam on you and your sister. You ignore her. You needed Ara to win over Princess Min before she won the hearts of anyone else. “I look forward to getting to know you once again. Both of you.” 

You smile, and bow again before moving on to let the others greet the royal family. 

Ignoring the heavy weight of Emperor Min’s gaze, you try to keep your sister distracted and engaged during the remainder of the banquet. For every goblet of wine your sister has, you make sure she also has a goblet of water. You don’t want her embarrassing herself in front of the other eligible ladies. You relax once the emperor’s gaze is no longer focused on you and take the chance to glance towards the throne, noticing the emperor in a deep discussion with his sister. The imperial princess has a strange smile on her face and is nodding her head along to whatever his highness is saying. You also notice that Concubine Nam is nowhere to be seen.

“Where did Concubine Nam go?”

“What?” Ara quickly looks around the large hall, her voice tinged with excitement, “Concubine Nam? His highness must have sent her away.”

"Strange..” you take a delicate bite of the fresh dumplings brought out by the servants, smiling a bit at how excited Ara is to find her possible rival missing, “I thought she never left his side.”  

“Well…” Ara is interrupted by the arrival of an imperial maid. The maid bows her head respectively and holds a silver tray with a folded golden parchment.

You grab the parchment and slowly open it, quickly read the contents, fold it and place it back on the tray. “Please tell your mistress we accept.”

The maid bows and scurries away. You watch her go and keep a calm mask on your face, even as your heart is racing. You knew the point of these banquets and festivities was to find the Emperor a bride, but to receive an invitation so quickly… You notice many of the young ladies in attendance are watching and you refuse to show any sort of emotion. 

Court was just a game of politics after all. And you intended to win. For Ara. 

Ara grabs your hand under the table where no one can see, “What was that about?”

“Ara, did you bring that pretty pale green dress that grandfather gifted you for your birthday last year?” You take a sip of your wine, and keep your tone low.

“Of course.” Ara nods her head and grabs some fruit slices from one of the platters on the table, but by the tenseness of her shoulders, you could feel her excitement. You would have to instruct her on how to hide it better. 

“Good. Wear it tomorrow.” You squeeze her hand, “we are invited to the morning meal with Imperial Princess Min.”

-0-0-0-

Imperial Princess Min’s courtyard and private rooms are absolutely gorgeous. Everything is draped in golds and pastels and smells of the fresh flowers that are placed throughout her rooms. The three of you sit at a finely crafted table in her pavilion, the only sounds are the bubbling of the large fountain nearby and the tinkling of the platters of food as they are placed upon the table before you. 

“Thank you for joining me this beautiful morning.” Princess Min smiles sweetly at you both, once you rise from your bow, gesturing for a maid to pour tea, “I do hope you enjoy the meal.”

“We are honored to be invited by her majesty for a meal. Thank you.” You bow your head reverently and sit in the chair the maid has pulled out. 

“Yes, thank you, your highness.” Your sister follows suit. The plates are quickly set with delicious smelling food, but you can only sip your tea, taking your cue from the princess who has barely glanced at her plate. 

“Tell me,” Princess Min takes a dainty sip of tea, “Are you enjoying your time at the palace?”

“It is very beautiful here. We are forever indebted to the emperor and the imperial princess for allowing us to visit.” You keep your voice soft and your sister nods along, her cheeks slightly puffed with the food she has in her mouth.

“And your rooms…” Princess Min continues, directing a maid to put some kimchi on her plate, “are they to your liking?”

“Yes your majesty. The Daisy courtyard is beautiful. Thank you for gracing us with such lovely lodgings.”

The princess inclines her head briefly and smiles, “What do you think of the emperor?”

“Oh, he is wonderful. The best ruler our empire has ever seen.” Ara gushes enthusiastically, “May our emperor live ten thousand years!”

You and Princess Min share a small smile, both seeing that Ara is completely infatuated with his highness. You take a small bite of the delicious food on your plate as Ara continues to praise the emperor. 

“And you?” Princess Min interrupts your sister and turns her gaze on you. Her dark eyes are so similar to her brother that it catches you off guard for a moment, “What do you think of the emperor?”

You didn’t understand why but you feel like your answer holds more weight than your sister’s. You lick your suddenly dry lips, smile demurely at the imperial princess and respond as blandly but nicely as possible, “His highness is a most generous and benevolent king.”

“That he is.” Princess Min smiles and glances at your sister, “And what are your thoughts on his harem?”

Your sister is quiet for a moment and you can see her struggling with finding what she wants to say, you gracefully answer for her, “I’m sure my sister would be most grateful to have others help serve the emperor.”

“Yes!” Ara nods eagerly, “I am most grateful that the emperor has many to keep him company.”

Princess Min hides a giggle behind her hand and you tilt your head, curious what could make the Princess giggle like that. 

“Indeed. You may be grateful for the… help.”

Your eyes widen but Ara continues to look confused. You share a look with the Princess before she continues, “My brother, the Emperor, has a… healthy appetite.” 

As if summoned by your discussion of him, your meal is interrupted by the arrival of a servant stepping into the pavilion, “His Royal Highness, Emperor Min Yoongi, 37th Emperor of the Min Dynasty.”

You and Ara quickly place down your chopsticks and stand from your seats to bow properly. 

“You may rise.” The emperor’s voice is deeper than you remember. He is dressed in an informal black robe patterned with crimson lotus flowers. Thick golden necklaces rest against his collarbones and his pale hair is pulled up into another topknot. You notice that his long, golden earrings aren’t as extravagant as the ones he wore the night before. You and Ara quickly return to your seats.

“Here is my darling sister.” The Emperor gently kisses Princess Min’s cheek before sitting in the empty chair that is placed directly across from you by a servant. “I hope you do not mind if I join you three for the morning meal.”

“Imperial Brother I can see right through you.” Princess Min giggles, “You just want to look at my pretty company.”

You feel your breath hitch when the emperor locks eyes with you, a dangerous smile pulling at his full lips, “Can you blame me? I cannot remember the last time I’ve been so enchanted.”

Princess Min smiles and glances between you and your sister, “The sisters are true beauties.”

“Indeed,” The emperor's eyes flicker to your sister before focusing back on you, “It’s refreshing to know that a father did not exaggerate his claims of his daughters’ virtues.”

"Our beauty does not dare compare to the Imperial Princess." Your sister answers perfectly, the flattery clear in her voice. You see the smile spread across Princess Min’s face, clearly pleased with Ara’s answer. 

Princess Min and Ara chatter for a while, the emperor occasionally joining the conversation, but his burning gaze never leaves your face. If anyone else notices his attention on you, they dare not mention it. You stay quiet, trying not to draw any attention away from Ara. You are proud of your sister, she is so poised as she engages in conversation with the royals. You were worried she would freeze up, or even worse, prattle on incessantly about nothing. You motion for a servant to refill your teacup and are startled when the emperor waives the servant away, refilling your cup himself. “Please, allow me.”

Everything stops around you at his actions, even the servants seem to freeze in place. You glance at your sister and the imperial princess, both completely in shock at the emperor’s generosity. Although you notice the imperial princess has a look of unbridled delight in her dark eyes.

“Thank you, your grace.” You incline your head and keep your face impassive. Only years of training drilled into you by your tutors prepared you for this. A lady must always be composed and even though you feel like your heart is going to beat out of your chest, you keep calm. You have no idea why his eminence would pour your tea as if he was your servant, but did not dare question his actions. 

The silence lasts longer than is socially acceptable and when you dare to look at him, the emperor’s eyes are already focused on you. You can feel Ara’s eyes darting between the two of you, but you can only focus on the emperor. He opens his mouth to say something when your meal is interrupted by several maids rushing into the room. His eyes release you from your trance as he looks away. 

You tell yourself that you’re grateful for the interruption. 

“Your highness!!!” They all drop to their knees once they see the emperor, their heads touching the ground, “Your highness you must hurry. Concubine Nam has collapsed!”

You glance at the maids in alarm and look back at the emperor, his brows furrowed, “Have the imperial healers been summoned?”

“Of course, your highness.” The head maid answers, rising from her bow. You realize that they must have been the personal maids of Concubine Nam. The other maids remain on their knees, foreheads pressed to the ground. 

The emperor turns away from the maids and takes a sip of his tea, dismissing them without words. You watch the head maid bite her lip before taking a step forward, “Please your highness, she is calling for you.”

You can see the displeasure on the emperor’s face. His eyes are angry, but the anger fades when he looks at you. He stares at you for a moment as if he’s waiting for your approval. You swallow and glance at the maids before meeting his gaze, “Your highness, please forgive this lowly maiden for speaking out of turn, but your beloved needs you. You should be at her side.”

“My beloved?” His voice is filled with mirth, and you wonder what is so humorous.

“Yes, your majesty.” You continue, licking your lips. His eyes follow your tongue. “Everyone knows she is your favored concubine. She needs you. You must attend to her.”

“You’re right.” His smile disarms you, again causing your breath to catch. “I must do what my beloved asks of me.”

With a swirl of his black robes, he is gone. The maids and his personal servants trailing behind him. 

The silence left by the emperor’s abrupt departure is broken by the tired sigh of the Imperial Princess. “I apologize for Imperial Brother.”

“No, no,” you immediately respond, seeing a forlorn expression on the princess’ face, “It’s alright. Concubine Nam needs him. I do hope she is alright.”

“Yes, hopefully it is nothing serious.” Your sister cannot hide the distaste in her voice at the mention of the concubine.

“Oh, it’s nothing serious.” The princess laughs scornfully, “Concubine Nam always pulls some sort of devious trick whenever she thinks my brother’s attention might be taken away from her.”

You glance in the direction the emperor disappeared, “Does she?”

“Yes. It’s pathetic.” 

You choke back a giggle when the princess rolls her eyes and instantly feel yourself relax. 

“She thinks she has my brother wrapped around her finger. Always throwing a tantrum or faking some sort of illness.” She sneers and shakes her head, looking at you as if confiding something, “Several months ago, when I first spoke to my brother about finding a potential bride, I thought for sure that she would do something then, but it looks like the little bitch was just biding her time.”

“That is terrible.” If Ara is shocked at the vulgar language used by the princess, her face doesn’t show it. She is calm and poised and while you know she has a million questions she wants to ask, she is keeping her composure until the two of you are alone in your courtyard. “Hopefully his highness sees through her tricks.”

“She’s not half as clever as she thinks she is. He knows exactly what she is doing, but he indulges her.”

“I’m sure his majesty has his reasons,” you smile at the princess, “have faith in your brother.”

Princess Min stares at you, a contemplative look on her face. You don’t know what she is looking for, but after a few quiet moments she smiles beautifully, “Yes. Of course, you’re right. I have faith in the emperor. He was chosen by the gods to rule our kingdom.”

“May he live ten thousand years.” Ara says solemnly. You and Princess Min murmur in agreement.

“Still,” Princess Min’s voice is resolute as she gestures for a maid to refill her tea cup, “Concubine Nam cannot be trusted. Be careful.”

You sip your tea, pushing thoughts of the emperor’s dark eyes to the back of your mind and wonder just how much danger your sister is in.

-0-0-0-

When you return to your courtyard, servants are rushing around packing your trunks..

“Excuse me,” you feel bad interrupting one of the maids, but you have no idea what is going on and can’t help but fear the worst, “what is happening?”

“My lady,” the maid bows her head, “we have orders to move you and your sister to the Golden Bell courtyard.”

You frown and watch the servants continue to carry out your things, Ara clutches your hand, “On whose orders?”

“His Royal Highness.”

“As you were.” You dismiss the maid and turn towards Ara. You can see the excitement in her eyes. She’s practically vibrating. You nod for her to follow you out to the main yard where an imperial carriage is waiting to take you to your new courtyard.

“Sister,” She whispers, “The Golden Bell Courtyard. That’s closer to Imperial Princess Min’s private courtyard.”

“I know.”

-0-0-0-

The Golden Bell Courtyard is stunning. The main yard is filled with the fragrant Golden Bell flowers and the rooms were at least twice the size of your previous courtyard. Ara is practically giddy with excitement as she throws herself down on the large bed in the room you chose.

“He must already be in love with me.” 

“Why wouldn’t he be?” You were surprised Ara was able to contain herself until the servants left. 

“Everything is so luxurious.”

“It is.” You sit yourself at the fancy dressing table in the corner of the room and check your reflection in the bronzed mirror, “You should get used to this.”

Ara giggles and snuggles into the soft bedding. You watch her through the mirror and smile at her behavior. She was still so young and you wish you could shelter her forever. You still worried about her marrying into the imperial family, but you felt a little better knowing that Imperial Princess Min seems to have warmed to her. “You need to thank his majesty at tonight’s banquet.” 

“Of course.” Your sister smiles and throws a soft goose feather pillow in the air, “I will make sure to thank him for his hospitality.”

-0-0-0-

Unfortunately, Emperor Min is not at the banquet that night. In fact, you were informed, for the next fourteen days he would not be attending any of the events Imperial Princess Min had scheduled.

You can tell the princess is upset. Her smile seems a little more strained and while she is able to handle everything as a hostess should, you can tell she is very stressed about whatever the emperor is currently handling. You have a strong suspicion it is related to Concubine Nam, but it is not your place to ask questions so you remain quiet. You do, however, try your best to help where you can, becoming a steadfast and loyal companion to her majesty, continuing to have meals with her whenever she requests and spending many afternoons in her pavilion with her. She would ask your opinions of the young ladies from the different households and tell you about what would be required of the empress consort. As the days moved along, the princess dismissed more and more of the potential brides for his majesty until only a handful were left. You were pleased that Ara seems to be the favorite.

You sit across from the Imperial Princess. She sent you a note at the morning meal requesting you to join her in her plum blossom garden this afternoon. You can tell the princess is upset. Her lips are pursed and her fingers are white as she grips her cup of tea tightly. You're afraid the delicate cup might crack. 

“Your majesty’s plum blossom garden is beautiful. It must be the most fragrant and lovely plum blossom garden in all of the empire.”

Imperial Princess Min gives you a soft smile. She dismisses the servants and they step back so they are out of hearing range, but close enough to see if her highness requires anything.

“Concubine Nam is with child.”

You are silent for a moment. You keep yourself composed and don’t dare show your thoughts on your face. Your mind is frantically trying to process what this means. How could this have happened? What does this mean for Ara? 

You swallow and gently speak, “Princess Min, please forgive this simple one for questioning, but I thought it was against the imperial law for a concubine to bear children?”

“It is.” Princess Min throws her tea cup on the ground in anger, two imperial maids rush over to clean up the shattered mess and prepare another cup of tea for her majesty. Once the servants step away, the Princess continues, “She stopped drinking the herbal tea the day my brother agreed to find a bride.”

“Will Concubine Nam be punished?” You don’t look at the princess when you ask, you focus on the full cup of tea in front of you.

“If she is punished, it won’t be until after she gives birth.” Princess Min takes a small bite of sweet cake, “The little bitch thinks the emperor will make her his empress consort.”

“Will he?” 

“No,” Princess Min gives you a reassuring smile, “He will choose someone most deserving.” Her eyes shift as she stares at you until you feel you have to look away. “He’s been diligently working on preparing everything for his chosen consort. That and this unfortunate incident with Concubine Nam has kept him busy.”

You feel relief to know that Concubine Nam’s schemes do not seem to be working. And from the knowing smile the princess gives you, you feel elated that Ara will definitely be chosen as the consort. “What of the child?”

“The child will be recognized as a prince of the kingdom, but not an heir. Only the Empress can provide an heir.” Princess Min still looks unhappy, “I hope this won’t affect things going forward.”

It almost sounds like a question, as if she’s asking you if it will affect things. But you know that can’t be. You release a breath you didn’t know you were holding. This news will be upsetting to Ara, but not all is lost. This can still be salvaged. She could still marry and become the empress. Her child will still be the rightful heir. “No, I’m sure my sister will love any child that his highness produces.”

“Oh, yes, of course your sister would.” Princess Min gives you a curious smile, her dark eyes shining as if she’s amused. She takes your free hand in hers, “I hope I can request your confidence in this matter.” She says and gives your hand an almost too tight squeeze, “This must not be told to anyone.”

“Of course,” You nod your head solemnly, “I won’t say a word.”

 -0-0-0-

The Emperor continues to absent himself from any events involving the possible consorts for the next several days. Even though it had yet to be announced, you knew he had already decided on an empress consort, therefore he did not need to attend any of the lavish events and parties his sister had scheduled. Though as the days progress and nothing more happens, you grow more and more concerned over Ara’s position until finally you are moved again to an even larger, more extravagant courtyard. 

The Mugunghwa Courtyard. 

The Mugunghwa Courtyard was reserved for the empress consort and is located directly next to the emperor’s private courtyard. The servants treat you and your sister like royalty, you are given the same respects the emperor and his sister are provided. Ara is enjoying the envious glares she receives from the other ladies and you allow her to enjoy her victory, but remind her to be polite and courteous to the servants because they will be her eyes and ears to what is happening in the other courtyards(including the harem).

Soon after you’re comfortably moved into the Mugunghwa Courtyard, the gifts begin arriving. Some days when you return to your rooms after the festivities, you find fresh Mugunghwa flowers on your bed. One morning you wake up and find a bottle of sweet perfumed oil. You know that it isn’t uncommon for a groom to bestow gifts upon his bride’s family, but you’re a little uncomfortable as the days progress and the gifts become more elaborate. Silk slippers, golden hairpieces, diamond necklaces… it’s all too much. Ara has also been receiving small gifts, flowers and oils. You don’t know why, but you don’t mention the jewelry or clothing to her. 

You continue to spend time with Imperial Princess Min, her personal servants would invite you, and only you, to have a private audience with her almost daily. Once, you asked her where the emperor was, as you had not seen him since breakfast almost a week ago. She had smiled at you as if you’d said the one thing she longed to hear, and informed you he’d been out of the palace. Taking care of business. But assures you that he would return soon. 

“If you would like, we can invite him to breakfast again.” She takes your arm and giggles, as if breakfast with her brother is against the rules. “But I might get jealous if my soon-to-be sister pays more attention to my brother than me.” 

Your heart soars at her words. This is practically confirmation that Ara will be chosen!

She keeps you updated on the goings on with Concubine Nam. The child is growing strong, and Concubine Nam has already started showing a small bump on her otherwise perfect body. While you never wish harm on anyone, you cannot hide your small sense of satisfaction when you're told that Concubine Nam is visibly distraught over the fact that the emperor has not once visited her since she collapsed.

You are still very concerned about Ara finding out about the pregnancy. You have kept your word and stayed silent on the matter, but you know Ara’s bubble of happiness will burst once she is made aware. You spend many of your days touring the multiple gardens of The Mugunghwa Courtyard in contemplation, trying to decide if you should tell Ara what is happening. 

You’re taking a leisurely stroll in the hibiscus garden when you suddenly feel like you’re being watched. This happens most days when you’re alone in the gardens, but no one is ever around so you dismiss it as your imagination. You startle when you hear the emperor’s deep voice call your name.

You spin around quickly and meet the burning gaze of the emperor. He’s dressed in his signature black robe, but this one is patterned with dark blue koi fish. His pale hair is pulled back in a low ponytail with a black headband across his forehead. Today he is wearing one long golden earring and a heavy golden choker around his throat. 

You briefly wonder if he would adorn his Empress in so much gold. 

“Your highness!” You immediately remember yourself and bow low.

You are still bent low and staring at the ground when you see a long black robe come into view. You feel a gentle finger under your chin and your head is tilted up until you’re standing again and staring directly up into the emperor’s perfect face.

He continues to stare at you, his eyes swirling with emotion. His finger moves from your chin to rub along your bottom lip and your eyes close involuntarily. He leans closer and you can smell the clean scent of his skin. You feel his breath on your lips…

The sound of a throat clearing jolts you. You snap your eyes open and immediately step away from the emperor’s personal space. Emperor Min is glaring heatedly at a eunuch who is standing several feet behind him. The eunuch looks apologetic, but you are grateful. 

“Your majesty, are you also here to tour the gardens?” You can feel your cheeks heat and you absentmindedly smooth out your dress. “The hibiscus garden is especially fragrant this time of year.”

His eyes are gentle when he looks at you. He gives you a soft smile, “No. I am here to see you.”

“Me? I do not know what I have done to deserve your attention. How can I help his majesty?”

Emperor Min’s voice is serious, “You deserve more than my attention. You deserve everything.”

You turn away from his penetrating gaze, focusing on a nearby flower, “Your highness has been very kind to me and my sister. I cannot thank you enough.”

“Do not thank me.” The emperor chuckles, “I am a king. I always have an ulterior motive.”

You realize he is most likely speaking of Ara. As Ara’s elder sister, you know you have the most influence over her and her opinions. He is trying to gain your favor so she will be more likely to accept his suit, but he must know that Ara is already in love with him. Princess Min would never keep that information from him.

“I have a gift for you.”

“Another gift?” You look up at his handsome face, “I couldn’t possibly accept anything else. You’ve been so generous already.” 

Faster than you can blink, his face is so close to yours, you can feel the brush of his lips as he speaks, his hand on your chin and eyes locked with yours. 

“I am the emperor. It is my divine right to give what I want, and to take what I want. Do you understand?” 

You blink and quickly lower your eyes, unable to bow your head, “Yes, your highness.” 

He moves away and you catch yourself before you can stumble from the suddenness of it all. 

“Eunuch Ki.” Emperor Min gestures and the eunuch steps forward holding a small wooden box, golden dragons painted on it. Eunuch Ki opens the box and you cannot stop your gasp when the contents are revealed. A beautifully hand carved jade bracelet is nestled within. You can see that your name is engraved in it along with the symbols of beauty and love. 

Emperor Min holds out his hand, waiting for you to give him yours. You place your hand in his and watch quietly as he gently pushes up the sleeve of your dress. His hand is so much larger than yours and you shiver when his thumb gently rubs along your wrist.

Eunuch Ki hands him the bracelet and he tenderly clasps it around your wrist. 

“Perfect.”

 You feel something inside you stir, “It’s lovely.” 

 “Not as lovely as the wrist it adorns,” he meets your eyes, “it becomes you.” 

You know you should pull away, part of you desperately wants to pull away. But he is the Emperor, and you know better. 

“Ara loves her gifts too!” You blurt out, trying desperately to control the way your heart is pounding. 

His face scrunches in thought and he tilts his head, “Ara… yes. Your sister. I’m glad she enjoys her gifts as well.” He raises your hand, flips it in his, and places a kiss on the inside of your wrist, lips brushing the cool jade beads. “Don’t take it off.” He commands, before leaving you alone once more. 

-0-0-0-

After that, you did not go into the gardens alone, always making sure Ara or Princess Min is with you. While you never did run into the Emperor in the gardens again, you still sometimes felt his burning gaze on you, but when you looked around, he was never there.

Today, you and Ara are staying in your own courtyard. You feel that both of you need a break from court. You know you certainly do. You have already had your morning meal in your rooms and were currently relaxing in one of the many drawing rooms. You smile as Ara pricks her finger again on her needlework. “Be careful Ara. A lady's hands should be soft and delicate.”

You can’t hide your laughter at the adorable glower she gives you. “Why do I have to do this? When I’m empress, I’ll have the royal seamstresses do this for me.”

“It’s a good skill to have and maybe your husband would want a personalized gift from you.”

Ara pouts but doesn’t say anything else. You sit in comfortable silence, her trying to embroider and you snacking on small sweet cakes. The days seem to be getting slightly cooler and you were appreciative. You didn’t know how long this consort selection was going to take, but you were already longing for home. You had written several letters to your father, letting him know of Ara’s progress and wanting to hear any news from home. You were hoping maybe your marriage to Lord Kim would be finalized, but unfortunately, there was no news about that. Your father seemed to avoid mentioning Lord Kim at all. As for Lord Kim himself, you sent him a few brief letters asking after his health and wellbeing, but had yet to receive a response. He was normally very quick to reply to your letters, but you brushed off his lack of response due to the fact that he must be very busy.

Your musings are interrupted by the arrival of several imperial servants and a finely dressed eunuch. They are carrying two large golden trunks and place them down in front of you and your sister. The eunuch steps forward and bows low.

“My ladies,” You recognize the eunuch as the emperor’s most trusted servant, Eunuch Ki, the one who was at his side in the hibiscus garden, “His Royal Highness would be most pleased if the mistresses would accept his gifts.”

You and Ara share a look and you quickly stand from the soft, golden sofa, “Thank you, Eunuch Ki. We are honored to receive gifts from his eminence.”

The large golden trunks are opened and you can hear Ara’s gasp of delight. The emperor has provided each of you a ceremonial dress made of fine, silk fabric and beautiful hair ornaments. Ara’s dress is a gorgeous light blue patterned with silver butterflies. The matching hair ornament is a hair pin styled in beautiful swirls of silver and jade, a single butterfly resting on top.  

Your dress is colored a rich gold and patterned with black mandarin ducks, diamonds line the long sleeves and train. The matching hair ornament is also a hair pin, but it looks to be solid gold with two mandarin ducks resting on top of a bed of orchids made out of diamonds. You hesitate at the pattern on the dress, unsure if this is a mistake. 

“If it pleases the mistresses, his highness requests you wear his gifts to the Grand Banquet tomorrow evening.”

“Of course, we would be delighted.” Ara beams at Eunuch Ki when you don’t respond right away, your eyes still focused on the pattern on your dress. 

“Eunuch Ki,” you follow him to the entrance of the drawing room, your voice quiet so others cannot overhear, “I feel there might be a mistake.” You gesture to your dress and your eyes flicker towards an oblivious Ara.

Eunuch Ki eyes you for a moment, his look is heavy and almost pitying, “The Emperor does not make mistakes.”

You swallow hard and nod at Eunuch Ki, closing the door behind him and turn to look at Ara. She’s already holding the dress up against herself and admiring it in the mirror. 

The Emperor might not make mistakes, but you were beginning to think you had. 

-0-0-0-

You slowly make your way towards the courtyard of the imperial princess. After Eunuch Ki had left last night, you received a summons from the Imperial Princess. She requested you to meet her for afternoon tea the following day before the grand banquet. 

This side of the palace was oddly quiet. You knew that everyone was preparing for the grand banquet, so all the activity would be much livelier near the grand banquet hall. You had yet to see that hall, apparently it was large enough to hold all the noble families of the kingdom comfortably. 

When you enter her private pavilion, Imperial Princess Min is reclining on a giant resting sofa, a servant girl fanning her. 

“Your highness.” You bow your head reverently and wait for her to receive you.

She smiles beautifully and sits up, her dark eyes shining beautifully, as she holds her hands out to you, “I’m so glad you are here.”

“Your Highness flatters me.” You go to her, smiling as you take her hands in your own before releasing them to gesture to the ornately carved tea table in the corner, “Afternoon tea?”

“Yes, we have much to discuss.” Princess Min stands up and elegantly makes her way to the table, you follow obediently behind her. Once you are both seated, Princess Min gestures for a servant to pour tea.

“Are you excited for tonight’s banquet?” Princess Min takes a sip of her tea, “I’m so very excited and the banquet isn’t even for me.”

“Of course, tonight is a grand occasion. It deserves to be celebrated properly.” You swallow a sip of tea and look around the beautiful pavilion. “Thank you so much for the hospitality you have shown my sister and I. Your kindness will never be forgotten.”

Princess Min smiles at you and chatters about the drama currently happening in the harem courtyard, Concubine Nam was still holding hope that Emperor Min would choose her as his bride, while the other concubines were furious over her blatant violation of the rules. You listen and chime in when necessary, indulging in Princess Min’s love for gossip. 

“What would you do with Concubine Nam and the harem?” Princess Min asks you, her voice curious, “How would you handle this entire scandal?”

“Well,” You ponder over her question for a moment. She had asked you similar questions before, but usually about how you would handle this political issue or that. Never one quite so close to home. You take another sip of tea, deciding how to answer without offending her, “an example would have to be made.”

“What kind of example?” Princess Min tilts her head slightly, her dark eyes swirling with something, “if you had the power, what would you do?”

“If I had the power?” You gesture for a servant to pour you another cup of tea and laugh softly, “If I had the power, my husband would not have a harem at all.”

Princess Min stares at you, her eyes practically glowing, “No harem? A normal man would not agree to your terms.”

You smile, “I will not marry just any man. I will marry a man solely devoted to me.”

The Princess giggles beautifully, “I love your way of thinking.”

“Well,” you giggle along with the princess, “My way of thinking isn’t something that is approved of. Luckily for his majesty, Ara will gladly allow him his harem.”

The princess quiets down and gestures for a servant to place a small, sweet cake on both of your plates. Her smile is sweet, “Tell me…”

“Hmm?” You tilt your head in question and take a small sip of tea.

Princess Min’s voice is light and soft, “when are you going to stop playing ignorant?”

You still completely, your stomach bubbling with dread. You keep your face calm and composed, but your heart is beating rapidly. After a brief silence, you question, “Pardon? Whatever do you mean?”

“You’re a very clever woman, it’s why I like you so much.” Her sweet smile never leaves her face, but her eyes are dark and cold. “You know exactly what I mean.” 

“No,” You keep your voice firm, “I do not know what you mean at all.”

Princess Min’s smile widens, but her dark eyes are unsettling, “Did you enjoy Imperial Brother’s latest gift?”

You slowly set your tea cup on the table, “His highness gives the most thoughtful gifts, we are forever in his debt.”

“You know, he chose the pattern and colors himself.”

“About that,” you lick your lips before continuing, “Eunuch Ki gave me the golden dress by mistake.”

“Oh you are good. For someone who claims they have no interest in court or politics, that is. Though you need a little more training before you sit in on a council.” The Princess takes a bite of cake, her eyes flashing, “I don’t recommend playing dumb with me, however.” 

“I don’t know what you could possibly mean.” 

The Princess ignores your remark, “Have you heard of my betrothed? Prince Regent Jung Hoseok. He’s the general of the Imperial Army.”

“Of course,” your mind frantically tries to understand where the connection is, “He has helped the emperor win many battles.”

“Did you know that he was betrothed before?”

You shake your head, but don’t reply. You have no idea what this discussion has to do with the emperor’s gifts, but you didn’t dare interrupt or question her.

“He grew up in the palace here with Imperial Brother and I. My father, the emperor at the time, practically raised him as one of his own. He was Imperial Brother’s companion and also to be his general in war. I had been in love with him since I was very young. He was all I ever wanted.” Princess Min Glances off into the distance, as if she’s reminiscing, “For his outstanding work as the General of the Imperial Army, my father gifted him a marriage to a nobleman’s daughter... Lord Tokko’s only daughter, Yeong.”

Lord Tokko’s name was vaguely familiar to you, you had heard your father mention him a few times. As for his daughter, you had never heard of this woman, but by the tone of Princess Min’s voice and the frown on her face, you know it was someone that the princess did not like.

“The Prince Regent agreed to the marriage, he actually cared for her, thought himself to be in love,” The princess scoffs and takes a small sip of tea, “It was not hard for me to get my father to agree to have Lady Yeong come to the palace to serve as a friend and companion for me.”

“She was one of the kindest, sweetest, young women I had ever met.” The Princess locks eyes with you, “So trusting that even as she lay dying, it never crossed her mind that I was the one that poisoned her.”

You're quiet for several moments, trying to gather your thoughts. Your voice is a little shaky when you finally ask, “Why are you telling me this?”

Princess Min ignores you once again, “We thought the sickness had skipped my brother. It usually only manifests itself in the women in my family, my grandmother had it too, you know?”

“What sickness?” You are growing more alarmed. The Princess was revealing information and secrets that you should not know and you did not understand her reasoning.

Again, Princess Min ignores you, continuing her story as if she were a player on stage and you the enraptured audience, “He never showed any symptoms, not a care in the world for anyone but himself. The closest he came was Concubine Nam, but nothing serious ever happened with her. He would never make her his consort, so I knew she wasn’t the one.”

“Imagine my elation when you finally arrived. You have turned out to be all we hoped for and more.” Princess Min smiles at you beautifully, her dark eyes shining almost manically, “The moment he saw you, your fate was sealed.”

Before today, having Princess Min’s confidence made you feel warm and welcomed. Now you only feel dread. 

“I.. I...” You lick your too dry lips and stumble over your words, your composure crumbling in the wake of the Imperial Princess’ confession, “I am to be married to Lord Kim. My father is working out the contracts.”

“Lord Kim?” The princess giggles, “My brother wanted to strip him and his family of their lands and titles, but I was able to talk him back from that.”

“I don’t understand.” You feel cold all over.

“Yes, you do.” The princess gestures and a maid comes forward holding a silver tray, the princess grabs the small bundle of letters and tosses them on the table, “You’re lucky that I was able to intercept these before Imperial Brother read them. If he knew you were writing to another man, he would have Lord Kim beheaded.”

You’re quiet, staring at the letters you wrote to Lord Kim asking after his health. The letters he never received. Too much was going through your mind. What about Ara?

“My father-”

“Your father has already agreed and I was able to have Imperial Brother gift a marriage to Lord Kim.”  Princess Min’s voice is pleasant, as if she's discussing the weather, “Your sister will be his bride.”

You stand abruptly from the table, your chair clattering to the floor behind you. You feel shaken and terrified. You knew something was off, but you were hoping, praying, you were wrong.

“Please excuse me, your majesty.” You step back from the table, your eyes slightly glassy, “I need to rest before tonight’s banquet.”

“Please, call me Ji-Soo…,” The princess smiles at you, her dark eyes are filled with what you now recognize as madness, the same look found in the emperor’s eyes when he looks at you, 

“..We’re family after all.”

-0-0-0-

When you arrive back at your courtyard, your mind is still struggling to comprehend what is happening. You rush past the servants and lock yourself in your room. You stare at the beautiful golden dress laid out on your bed, the diamonds twinkling as if mocking you. It wasn’t supposed to be this way. Ara is supposed to be empress.

You slide to the floor, your back against the door. This wasn’t supposed to happen. You stare at the dress, but your mind isn’t focused on it. You’re trying to think, trying to plan. What are you supposed to do? You don’t even entertain the thought that your father will save you. You have no choice. Emperor Min holds all the power. 

You don’t realize that hours have passed with you staring blankly at the dress until the servants knock on your door. “My lady, we are here to prepare you for the banquet.”

“I don’t need help to prepare. Please leave me.”

“My lady,” The voice of the maid is trembling, fearful, “The emperor insists.”

You swallow and stand, your legs shaky. You open the door and stare at the servants, they are terrified. Terrified of the emperor, terrified of his displeasure. You realize that you and them are not so different. No one has a choice. Everyone is subject to Emperor Min’s whims.

“Where is Ara?”

“She has already been prepared for the banquet.” Several servants rush in carrying a large washing tub filled with steaming water. The water is fragrant and several flowers are flowing on the surface. 

You watch a large dressing screen being set up around the tub, several of the servants bow low to you before quickly leaving the room. You look at them questioningly and an older maid steps forward, “Forgive us, my lady. We are under strict instructions and not allowed to help you undress or bathe.”

“What? Why?”

The maid licks her lips and hangs several white undergarments over the dressing screen, “The emperor made a new decree that it is a crime punishable by death for anyone other than the emperor himself to view the empress consort’s nude body.” 

It’s a jarring experience to be referred to as the empress consort. 

“It- it is not official.” 

You want to scream at them that this is wrong. That you’re not even betrothed, that this isn’t supposed to be you. 

They won’t meet your eyes. 

The jade bracelet on your wrist slides, warm beads against cool skin, and that’s when you realize all the mistakes you have made. You can’t stop the heavy weight you feel in your chest. You can feel your lips begin to tremble and your eyes feel watery. You don’t want to cry, but you know you should because you have the horrible feeling that once you are announced as the chosen empress consort at the banquet, the emperor will not let you out of his sight. 

The maid smooths over any imaginary wrinkles in the undergarments and gives you a pitying look, “Please get dressed in these once you are finished and we will prepare you for the banquet.” 

You’re left alone and you robotically remove your dress and undergarments. The water is hot and relaxing and it soothes your frazzled nerves. You lean your head back against the washing tub, you can hear the maids quietly talking behind the dressing screen. Your mind is racing. You are a smart girl. Your father has always praised your brilliance and forward thinking and lamented over you not being born a boy. You could figure this out. You could find a way out. 

There is obviously something seriously wrong with the Imperial siblings. The Princess herself confessed to murdering a love rival and the emperor has never shown any sign of this alleged sickness until now. Concubine Nam is carrying his child. You’ve already told Princess Min about your distaste of the harem. You refuse to have a husband that continues to keep a harem of concubines. 

But you know, you know, you could not refuse the emperor’s suit. You did not have any choice in the matter. While this is not the outcome that you nor Ara want, you know that your father will be pleased. All men want is power. They do not care for who they hurt or how they use their children like pawns. Your father will be the father-in-law of the emperor, his position and power will be secured.

The water is cold when you finally decide to step out of the washing tub. You resolve yourself to your future. Being the Empress Consort is not the worst fate you can have, but you were fearful of your sister’s reaction. She will hate you. 

You slowly put on your undergarments and step out from behind the screen. The maids eagerly rush you over to the large dressing table and sit you down. You stare at your worn reflection in the large, ornate mirror. 

Several maids kneel at your sides, dipping your fingers and toes in a dark paste. Other maids rub scented lotion onto your arms and legs. You watch through your reflection as the older maid rearranges your hair into an intricate updo, her skilled hands working effortlessly.

Your voice is a little hoarse when you speak, but you clear your throat and look at the older maid, “Will you be my personal servant?”

“Of course,” The maid gives you a warm smile, “His highness chose me personally to care for his bride.”

You give her a strained smile in return, neither of you mention the fact that the emperor chose servants that would be loyal to him. It wasn’t uncommon for a bride to bring a handful of trusted servants with them to their new home, but these aren’t normal circumstances. You would truly be alone here. “May I know your name?”

“Unso.”

“Unso.” You say the name carefully, “Please take good care of me.”

“My absolute pleasure.” She beams and gestures to your hair, the golden hairpin shining on top. The hairstyle is extravagant and more beautiful than any you have ever worn. The other maids clean the dark paste off your fingers and toes, revealing the nails to be stained a pretty red. Another servant brings a small jar of white cream and rubs it onto your face. You sit still as makeup is applied to your face. Your lips are painted a dark red and your eyes are lined with kohl. A small, delicate mugunghwa flower is painted in red and black between your eyebrows.

You stand and the maids help you dress in the beautiful golden dress. They take their time making sure everything is perfect. When you are fully dressed, the servants all stand back and stare at their hard work.

“Mistress is the most beautiful!”

“The Emperor has chosen well!”

“Her beauty is unparalleled!”

“An absolute vision!”

“His highness will be most pleased!”

The praises are interrupted by Eunuch Ki. He gives you a once over before nodding to Unso, “Excellent. Make sure everything is prepared as instructed.”

Unso nods her head and steps back.

“My lady,” Eunuch Ki bows low to you, “Please allow me to escort you to the banquet hall.”

You look around nervously, “But Ara-” 

“Your sister is already at the banquet.”

“I see.” You nod your head realizing you don’t have a choice, “I would be honored for Eunuch Ki to escort me.”

He gives you another low bow and turns to lead the way out of your rooms. Unso gives you an encouraging smile and you nod your head in return. Eunuch Ki leads you out of your courtyard to an extravagant imperial carriage. From the design and brilliance, you can tell that this is the emperor’s personal carriage. 

The ride to the grand banquet hall is quiet. You’re positive that you’re shaking in your seat. Eunuch Ki is watching you, but he doesn’t comment on your nerves. The carriage comes to a stop and the door is opened by an imperial guard. Eunuch Ki steps down first. You follow slowly behind him, all the servants and guards bowing in your presence. 

The long walk to the banquet hall seems to last seconds. You can feel sweat beading on your forehead and you are distractedly worried that all the servants' hard work on your face paint will come undone.  The closer you get to the hall, the louder the music and laughter from inside becomes. You can hear that it is a grand celebration and you worry for a moment that you are late. 

Eunuch Ki stops several feet away from the double doors. He gives you a sad smile and leans close to you, “An empress does not show fear. An empress does not show despair.”

You nod your head in understanding, straighten your back and hold your head high. You can feel your heart beating out of your chest; the expectations of the kingdom weighing on your shoulders. You can feel the sinking feeling in your stomach that Ara will never forgive you. You desperately hope she can understand. 

You do not have a choice. 

“Please open the doors.”

The large golden doors are heavy, requiring several servants to push them open. A loud chime is heard from the inside of the room. Eunuch Ki steps forward and announces your arrival, but you cannot hear him over the sound of the blood rushing through your ears. 

You step forward and you can feel all eyes are on you, but the only eyes you can focus on are the emperor’s. Dark, calculating, mad. He’s not dressed in his customary black, but gold. His ceremonial robes are a bright gold patterned with black mandarin ducks, matching yours. His long hair is unbound, a glittering crown is placed upon his brow. He is the most beautiful man you’ve ever seen. 

The room is so quiet you can hear a pin drop. You take several slow steps into the room and make your way towards the emperor. Before you reach him, Princess Min steps forward, a handsome man you recognize as Prince Regent Jung Hoseok at her side. The couple is dressed in matching colors. Royal blue and patterned with silver bats. Princess Min leans close to you and kisses both your cheeks. She pauses to whisper a quiet, “Good Girl,” that only you can hear. Prince Regent Jung gives you a low bow.

You bow in return to the Princess and her betrothed. The room is still deathly quiet. When you finally reach the emperor, he stares at you as if you are the only thing he has ever wanted. You prepare to bow, but Emperor Min stops you, “From this moment forward, you bow to no one.”

You swallow and nod your head. Emperor Min continues staring at you, his eyes swirling with equal parts happiness and madness. Eunuch Ki steps forward holding a golden goblet. You stare at the goblet and then look at the emperor in horror. This isn’t right. You realize quickly that this is no ordinary celebration banquet. 

This is a wedding. 

You quickly look away, desperately searching for Ara. Slim fingers grip your chin tightly, you can feel the cold metal of his rings pressing into your skin. Your face is turned back to the Emperor.

“Who is the king?” His voice is quiet, but firm, “Who is the boss?”

You stare into his cold eyes. He knows he has you trapped and he knows there is nothing you can do. While you want to believe that you had reconciled yourself with your fate, you had truly hoped that you had more time to find a way out. But there is no way out.

After a few moments, you nod your head in understanding and open your mouth to accept a drink from the goblet. Emperor Min takes the goblet from Eunuch Ki and holds it to your lips. His smile is gentle, but his eyes are filled with triumph as you drink.

The rice wine is sweet but you barely taste it. You swallow a large gulp and lick your lips. The emperor’s eyes darken as he watches you and his smile widens. He gently places the goblet into your hands and you carefully hold it up to his lips. He takes several large gulps, but never breaks eye contact with you. 

Eunuch Ki grabs the goblet from you and before you know what is happening, you’re in the emperor’s embrace. One of his hands cup the back of your head as the other holds you tightly by the waist, “Finally, you’re mine.”

His kiss catches you off guard and you close your eyes involuntarily. You know that kissing is improper for a wedding ceremony and should only be done in private, but no one would dare question the emperor. His lips are soft and taste of the rice wine you just drank. When his tongue gently coaxes your lips open, you do not resist. Your fingers grip his shoulders and you cannot stop yourself from melting into him. 

When he finally releases you, you steady yourself against him. You’re in a daze as the emperor leads you to the royal table. You stand quietly at his side as he raises a glass of wine in a toast, “To my new bride, your new empress!”

The hall is filled with thunderous applause and cheering. Your moves are robotic as the emperor instructs you to sit next to him. He fills your plate with all your favorite delicacies and pours you a cup of tea. The musicians start playing music again and the murmur of conversations start up around you. You glance around the hall and realize that all the eligible young ladies that were prospective consorts are wearing matching dresses. Light blue and patterned with butterflies. The same dress that Ara was gifted.

You look around for Ara and you find her seated between your father and Lord Kim. Your father and Lord Kim seem to be in a serious conversation. Ara looks calm and composed, but her eyes betray her. You can see her unhappiness and your heart aches. 

“Beloved,” You’re jolted by the emperor’s deep, somber voice, “Don’t worry about your sister. She will be taken care of. Lord Kim will make her happy.”

It takes you a moment to respond, but you do so quietly, “My sister’s only happiness will always be with the emperor.”

The emperor glances in the direction of your sister and then turns back to you, his smile is sweet, “You are a good sister, but it’s time you put your happiness first.”

You’re puzzled, “My happiness?”

“Your happiness.” Emperor Min kisses your lips softly, “To be my bride. To be my queen. To be mine.”

You stare at him incredulously, and realize he truly believes that you are happy being his bride. He really thinks you wanted this and were only holding yourself back for Ara’s sake. Princess Min gives you a knowing smile from across the table. You sit in a daze as the night progresses. The emperor would let no other serve you, but himself, constantly refilling your plate and cup.

You can feel the angry glare of Concubine Nam on you from across the hall and when you finally meet her gaze, you're startled to realize that she’s also wearing the same light blue dress, patterned with silver butterflies, that Ara was gifted. In fact, all the concubines are dressed this way.

Concubine Nam’s face is fuller and glowing beautifully. Her soft, demure persona would be more believable if her eyes weren’t filled with hatred. You’re secretly pleased that her plan to trap the emperor has failed. If she was smart, she would try to gain favor with you, but instead she will most likely plot to poison you. You give her a small nod of acknowledgement and she sneers in return before turning away. 

The night drags on and you're exhausted from trying to keep a happy facade. You catch your shoulders drooping more often than not, and even feel yourself lean against the emperor a time or two. 

When it is finally time to receive congratulations from the representatives from the noble families, you stay quiet at the emperor’s side. You smile when needed and murmur thanks when prompted. Everything feels unreal.  

When your family steps forward, you try to catch Ara’s eyes. She nods her head at Princess Min and bows low to you, “Your highness, many happy wishes on your marriage. May the gods bless you with healthy sons.”

Her voice is cold and you can see the hatred in her eyes. You grab her hand, “Ara please, you must understand.”

“Understand that my sister is a liar?” Ara raises her voice and pulls away from you, “Understand that she is a snake who planned this?!”

“Ara, no.” Your voice cracks and you can feel tears brimming in your eyes, your exhaustion and stress finally catching up to you, “You are my most beloved sister. I would never-”

“And yet, here you are.” Ara’s voice is mocking, “Empress.”

The scene your sister is making draws the attention of your father and Emperor Min, who were in the middle of a quiet conversation near you. Even Princess Min is frowning from where she is seated, obviously hearing the raise of Ara’s voice. 

“Enough.” The emperor’s voice is cold as he glares furiously at Ara, “You dare to show disrespect to your empress?”

“She tricked you! Can’t you see she tricked you?!” Ara ignores the dangerous aura surrounding Emperor Min, “It was supposed to be me! I am supposed to be your queen. I love y-”

“Guards. Detain her. Disrespect to the empress is punishable by death.”

You can see the fear on Ara’s face, she backs away quickly, but the guards grab her. Your father looks alarmed and even Lord Kim looks fearful for your sister’s life. You look at the emperor and grip his arm tightly, “Please, please do not punish her. She doesn’t know what she’s saying.”

“She dared to disrespect you. She doesn’t deserve to live.”

“Please,” You beg him, you look at Ara’s fearful face and close your eyes in dismay, you know she will hate you even more after this. You firm your resolve and open your eyes, “She’s only a child.”

You press yourself against the emperor, “She’s harmless. She knows that what we have is real. She knows that you love me. She’s only jealous.”

The emperor’s eyes soften as he stares at you. “And you? Do you love me?”

You glance at your sister, an apology in your eyes, before wrapping your arms around Emperor Min, “I love you. Only you.”

He kisses you deeply and waves away the guards. Once he breaks the kiss, you feel yourself sag against him in relief as Ara is released and your father ushers her away. You can feel Lord Kim staring at you and when you finally meet his gaze, you're taken aback by the devastation in his eyes.

His eyes flicker between you and the emperor before he turns around and follows after your father. You stare after him but the emperor blocks your view. You look up and meet his eyes.

“Your eyes are only meant for me. No one else.”

You nod your head, but don’t say a word. Emperor Min continues to stare at you for a moment longer, before he presses a soft kiss to your forehead. 

“Eunuch Ki.” 

Eunuch Ki suddenly appears at the Emperor’s side ready and willing to do whatever is asked of him and gives a low bow, “Your majesty.”

“Take my bride to rest.”

“At once, your grace.” Eunuch Ki gestures for you to follow him and you do so without another word. Once the heavy golden doors close behind you, you finally let the tears fall from your eyes. You cry silently on the long carriage ride back to the other side of the palace. Eunuch Ki looks uncomfortable and like he wishes to offer words of comfort, but has no idea what to say. 

You go to rub your eyes with the sleeve of your dress, but Eunuch Ki stops you and hands you a soft cloth, “Forgive me your highness, but your dress must be preserved for the royal archives, you must not dirty it.”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know.” You give a sad hiccup laugh and look out the carriage window. You realize quickly that you are not headed to the Mugunghwa Courtyard, but to the Emperor’s private courtyard. 

“I thought the Emperor wanted me to rest.”

Eunuch Ki gives you a look, but doesn’t respond. When the carriage rolls to a stop, Unso is there to help you down from the carriage. If she sees the distress on your face, she doesn’t comment on it. She gives you a low bow and leads you into the Emperor’s lair.

His private courtyard and rooms are enormous. Everything is draped in silks of black and gold. When you finally reach the Emperor’s private chambers, you’re astounded. His bedroom has the largest canopy bed you have ever seen, covered in a mountain of pillows. There is a large wooden desk in one corner of the room surrounded with several shelves filled with scrolls. There’s two separate golden resting sofas, each larger than you have ever seen and even a large dressing table with a mirror, obviously for a woman to use. There are also large double doors leading out to a small, private hot spring.

You watch Unso bustle around the room, preparing things and beckoning you over to the dressing table. “Your highness, let me help you remove your makeup.”

You sit quietly at the table and let Unso gently wash your face. You watch her put a special cream under your eyes to bring down the puffiness from your tears. She takes her time undoing your hair and leaving it unbound. You meet her eyes in the reflection of the mirror, “How many women has he bedded here?”

She looks puzzled at your question, “His majesty has never brought any woman here.”

“Concubine Nam?”

“Never.” Unso’s voice is resolute, “His majesty has never brought any woman, harem or no, here. These are his private chambers.”

“I see.” You don’t know if she’s lying to you, but if she is, you appreciate it. You feel slightly better knowing you are the only woman to ever sleep in his chambers.

Unso opens a chest and pulls out a black silk robe embroidered with red mugunghwa flowers and lays it over the top of the dressing screen in the corner of the room, “Your highness, you should remove your clothes and put this on. I’ll make you some tea and then you can lay down and rest.”

You slowly make your way behind the dressing screen and painstakingly remove your wedding dress. You leave it in a heap on the floor along with your undergarments. You know there is no point in wearing them and while you are nervous and a little scared, you know the consummation is inevitable. 

You put the silk robe on, and gently tie the sash around your waist. When you step around the dressing screen, Unso has already prepared the bed by removing many of the pillows and replacing the black silk sheets with a soft, white one. The white sheet shines ominously in the low light of the lanterns. 

“Your highness, have some tea to soothe your nerves.” Unso has brewed some fresh tea, but the scent is different than any you have had before. You sit stiffly on the edge of the newly made bed and take a small sip of tea. The taste is slightly bitter, but soon you feel yourself relaxing. 

“What type of tea is this?” You ask as Unso refills your cup and urges you to drink more.

She pats your head and gives you a warm smile, “Don’t worry. It was requested by his highness to help improve your health.”

You nod and don’t question her. You assume it’s similar to what the harem drinks to prevent pregnancy. The emperor is still young and with the drama that Concubine Nam has caused, you doubt children were on his mind. Before you know it, you’ve finished the entire pot. 

Unso helps tuck you in bed, and turns down all the lanterns. The only light in the room is that from the moonlight seeping in through the heavy curtains. You can barely keep your eyes open and the last thing you hear before you drift asleep is Unso’s quiet words, “Rest well, your majesty. You will need it.”

-0-0-0-

You’re awoken by a soft noise. You sit up and look around but don’t notice anything out of place. You’re still alone in the emperor’s bed. You see a faint glow under a previously unnoticed door in the far corner near his large desk. 

You get out of bed and make your way to the door. It opens soundlessly and a large staircase is revealed. You slowly make your way up the staircase, being careful not to make a sound. At the top of the staircase is a large room. It looks like an artist’s studio. Numerous canvases line the walls, charcoals and paints scattered over several large wooden tables stationed through the room. 

You see half finished portraits of Princess Min and a few of the previous emperors. You step into the room, careful not to disturb the artwork. There are some more paintings of several gardens and fountains that inhabit the palace grounds. In the corner of the room there is a beautiful hand carved desk, slightly smaller than the large tables, covered with more artwork. When you get closer you realize the paintings and sketches are all of you. You in the dress you wore the first night you arrived, you smiling in Princess Min’s private pavilion, you taking a walk in one of the private gardens, you asleep in your private rooms. Hundreds of paintings and drawings of you. 

You see another canvas underneath, it's slightly worn with frayed edges as if it’s been touched frequently. When you pull it out you see it's a painting of you, but this one you recognize. Two summers ago your father had you and your sister sit for a family portrait. The artist was impeccable and it was one of the most accurate paintings you had ever seen of yourself, it was almost like looking in the mirror. You see that the painting is torn, your sister and father removed from the portrait.

“You’ve found my sanctuary.”

You startle at the emperor’s voice and drop the canvas as if you’ve been burned. He’s standing at the entrance of the room, he’s no longer dressed in the golden robe, but now his signature black. It’s tied loosely, so the smooth pale skin of his chest is visible. His blond hair is loose and his crown is gone. 

“You’re quite the artist.” You gesture around the room, “but I notice there is no artwork of your concubines, of your beloved Concubine Nam.”

The emperor glances around, taking in his artwork as he steps further into the room, “Are you jealous of In-Suk?”

You frown at the use of her first name, but do not deny his accusation, “I do not like the thought of my husband bedding other women.”

“There are no other women.” Emperor Min slowly makes his way over to you, “You’re the only one that matters.”

You glance back at the desk littered with portraits of you, your eyes stopping on the torn family portrait, “How long have I been the only one that matters?”

He smiles, “Does it matter?”

“Yes.” You keep your voice calm and composed, “It matters to me.”

Emperor Min stands close to you, his fingers trailing over the artwork on the desk, “I had no interest in marriage. Lords and other noblemen constantly throwing their daughters at me. Your father is no different. Going on and on about Ara and how wonderful and virtuous she is.” He smiles wryly, “I finally got him to shut up by feigning interest.”

The emperor gently picks up the torn family portrait, “Imagine my surprise when he brings me this. A beautiful family portrait. I ask him about you and he immediately tells me about what a beautiful and doting older sister you are to Ara. How ever since your mother died, you have helped raise her. How you love her more than anything.”

He sets the portrait down and grabs your hands, gently turning you to face him, “I knew then that you would sacrifice everything for your beloved sister. I also knew that I needed to get you into the palace. Once you were here, you could not deny me.”

“But I was supposed to marry Lord-”

“Never say his name again.” Emperor’s Min’s voice is hard, leaving no room for discussion, “I am your husband. He is nothing.”

“Of course,” Your voice is quiet, you hesitate for a moment before you continue your questioning, “But… but Princess Min set up the consort selection. She told me she had to practically beg you to agree.”

“My beloved wife.” Emperor Min cups your face affectionately, his previous sour mood at the mention of Lord Kim completely gone, “You’re too trusting. She poisoned her companion, do you really think she would not lie to help her brother?”

“But Ara-”

“Ara will forgive you.” He presses a soft kiss against your lips, “Or she won’t. It does not matter.”

“But-”

“Is it really so bad being Empress?” Emperor Min presses another kiss to your lips, his fingers tangle in your unbound hair, “Being Mother to the country?”

“No-no, I am grateful to your majesty.” You shiver at his touch, grasping his shoulders as he presses himself against you.

“Yoongi.” He places more kisses down your lips and chin, “Call me Yoongi.”

“Yoongi!” You gasp when he softly bites your neck.

You feel him reach behind you and push everything off the large desk, the sound of canvases and painting supplies hitting the floor echoes throughout the room. Yoongi picks you up and sits you on the large desk, his lips never leaving your skin.

“You’re all I’ve ever wanted.” His mouth is muffled by the skin of your neck, his lips and tongue trail lower. You feel hot all over and cannot help but shiver when his hand yanks the collar of your robe down your shoulder. “My beautiful queen.”

Your fingers clutch at the silk fabric of his robe, holding him closer to you. You don’t stop him when he undoes your robe, his hot fingers trailing down the skin of your abdomen. “Beloved, will you show me?”

You wordlessly lean back, letting the open robe slip down your arms, baring your nude body to his view. His eyes are burning as he drinks you in. “Absolutely Exquisite.”

Yoongi leans over you, pressing himself between your thighs, and kisses you deeply. His tongue licks into your mouth with desperation. His hands are shaking as he grips your hips, and you quickly free yourself from the sleeves of your robe.

He breaks the kiss to trail his mouth down your neck and chest, his hot tongue swirls around your exposed breast before suckling the nipple. You can’t stop your moan, your whole body jerks at the feeling. “Y-Yoongi!”

“Say it again.” Yoongi’s voice is filled with desperation as he kisses down your ribs, “Say my name again.”

“Yoongi.” You whisper and your stomach clenches when he kisses lower, his wet tongue trailing over your abdomen. You’re so aroused, you can feel your wetness coating your thighs, but you can’t bring yourself to be embarrassed. 

“I have never seen a more beautiful woman.” Yoongi presses a soft kiss below your belly button, “The country has never had a more beautiful empress.”

“Your highness flatters me.”

“No.” Yoongi’s firm voice startles you and when you meet his eyes, they are burning with madness, “This emperor loves you. Only you.”

You shiver at the look in his eyes and nod your head in return, “Yes. Of course.”

Yoongi presses another kiss to your abdomen, his large hands gripping your thighs as he stares at you, “Will you deny your king?”

“Never.”

The smile he gives you is equal parts beautiful and dangerous, his dark, dark eyes overflowing with adoration for you, “Good girl.”

Your breath catches when he spreads your thighs apart and leans forward, his mouth inches away from your wet, pulsing cunt. “I wonder if you taste as succulent as you smell.”

You feel your pussy throb at his words and you lean your head back against the desk, your eyes closing in anticipation. You find his crude words more arousing than you ever thought possible. Your heart is beating so fast and you can feel sweat beading on your forehead. While you have never been intimate with a man, you were no stranger to self pleasure. You just never imagined your first experience with a man would be the emperor of the entire nation between your thighs, waiting to pleasure you. The heady rush of excitement is making you dizzy.

You tense when Yoongi presses the flat of his tongue against your juicy pussy. His tongue is hot as it licks a slow stripe up to your clit and you both release a throaty groan when he sucks your clit into his mouth.

You don’t realize you’re holding your breath until you get light headed from lack of oxygen. You're shivering all over and you feel a tight pressure in your stomach. Your entire body is tuned to Yoongi’s mouth, every lick and suck of his tongue has you soaring. 

“Better.” He whispers between licks of your swollen clit, his fingers shaking as he holds your thighs apart, “You taste so much better than anything I’ve ever had before.” 

You press your hand into your mouth to bite down on, trying to muffle your moans. Your other hand scrambles for something to hold onto before tangling in his long, soft hair. 

You press your heel into his back, but if Yoongi is bothered, he does not show it. He’s completely focused on devouring you. You bite your hand hard to cover your squeal when his hot fingers gently probe your cunt. He reaches up to pull your hand out of your mouth, his fingers gently stroking your wrist around the jade bracelet, “Do not dare hide your pleasure from me.”

He places your hand on his head, near your other hand already grasping his hair, and encourages you to use him as you please. A long, thick finger slips inside you and you cannot stop yourself from clamping down, your hips automatically rolling up into his face. 

“That’s it, my beautiful girl,” Yoongi continues to flick your clit with his tongue, “Ride my face.”

Your fingers grasp his head, holding his mouth against your aching cunt. You’re throbbing and dripping and you know you are going to come soon. You can feel the release building deep inside you. Yoongi presses another finger into your dripping hole and you can feel yourself trembling. He’s completely focused on you and your pleasure, his mouth working nonstop to help you reach your peak. 

You sit up slightly and meet his dark gaze, his eyes are brimming with satisfaction. You grip his hair hard and press his face against your dripping cunt. You’re so close you’re practically vibrating with pleasure. 

He twists his fingers and you're coming. You release a soundless gasp and can’t stop yourself from gushing all over his fingers. Yoongi moans at the taste of you, his mouth eagerly trying to swallow every drop of your release. You collapse on the desk, your orgasm still thrumming through your body. 

You barely catch your breath when he’s hovering over you, your release glistening on his lips and chin. He kisses you deeply, making sure you can taste yourself on his tongue. You can feel his body trembling as he undoes his robe and you cannot figure out if he’s nervous or excited, or a combination of both.

He breaks the kiss to look at you and your stomach flutters at his gaze, so full of yearning and affection, you’re no longer sure why you ever thought about denying him. You hadn't even realized something was missing from your life, he was missing from your life, until this moment. You weren't just doing this out of a sense of duty. Because you were his wife. Because he was your husband. You wanted this. Desperately. More than you’d wanted anything up until this moment. 

Full of your realization, you push his robe off his shoulders and spread your legs wider, allowing him to press himself completely against you. He’s hot and hard, pulsing between your thighs. You shiver at the feel of him, your sticky cunt still dripping from your orgasm. You look at him, his cheeks flushed pink, his forehead and chest slightly sweaty, his hair a tangled mess. His scar looks less intimidating in the low light of the lanterns.

“You love me?” You don’t realize you have said the words out loud until he stares at you, his dark, dark eyes burning.

“More than anything.” 

It’s intoxicating knowing you have this beautiful man confessing his love to you. He is the most powerful man in the entire world and he loves you more than anything. You can’t help the ugly feelings of jealousy bubbling in your stomach, knowing other women have seen him undone like this. Knowing that Concubine Nam has had him like this is unacceptable. 

“I want them gone.” You shift forward slightly, the head of his thick cock catching on your entrance. You feel so hot between your legs, your cunt aching to be spread open by him. 

“Who?” He sounds confused, distracted. His whole body is trembling, holding himself back from thrusting up into you.

“Your whores.” You roll your hips and feel him sink a few inches inside you, you hold your breath and try not to tense up at the intrusion. “I will not have a husband that has a harem. I want them all gone, especially that bitch Nam. I can’t stand the thought of anyone else seeing you like this.”

“Yes,” You feel more than hear him gasp, his forehead pressing against your shoulder, “Anything you want.

“You’re mine.” 

Your whispered declaration causes something inside of him to snap. You’re unprepared when he pushes completely inside of you. The burning stretch of his thick, heavy cock leaves your breathless. He groans into your chest, barely giving you a moment to adjust before he’s thrusting in and out. Every roll of his hips has you clenching around him. His lips press soft kisses into your skin between pants of yesyesyes and all yours. You’re soaked and shaking, your fingers clutch his shoulders, trying to anchor him against you. He’s so thick and so large, you swear you can feel him in your stomach.

“My Empress, My Goddess,” Yoongi whispers reverently into your skin, “I will give you everything.”

“Yes,” You press yourself closer to him, ignoring the feel of his ringed fingers bruising your hips, “All I want is you.”

Every thrust of his hips brings you closer to the edge. You’re quivering around him, so close you can almost taste it. You shudder when he releases your hip, his fingers gently rubbing your swollen clit, causing you to pulse around him. “That’s it, my beloved girl. Come for me.”

Yoongi softly pinches your clit and you explode. His tongue licks up your throat, his mouth swallowing your quiet cries of pleasure. You clench down and feel him gasp against you, his body shuddering uncontrollably. The pulse of his cock inside you floods you with warmth.

You close your eyes and hold him against you, trying to catch your breath. Your heart felt like it was going to beat out of your chest. You slowly run your fingers through his hair and smile when you realize he’s still buried inside you.

He sits up and stares at you. You can see your reflection in his dark eyes. Your hair is disheveled and your lips are swollen. You can see your eyes are hazy with pleasure and several love bites adorn your neck and shoulders.

“My beloved bride.” Yoongi smiles at you affectionately, his fingers gently brush your hair back from your sweaty forehead, “I will never let you go.”

-0-0-0-

When you awaken you’re alone in the emperor’s bed, his side is cool, as if he’s been gone for hours. You’re sore all over, your husband spent most of the night inside of you, making you come over and over again until the early morning light.

You wrap the wrinkled white sheet around you and stand on shaky legs. You slowly make your way to the door and call for Unso. She appears immediately, almost as if she was waiting for you.

She helps you sit at the dressing table and goes about opening the curtains. Based on the sunlight entering the room, you can tell it is already early afternoon. Several maids clear the used bedding from the bed, and replace the sheets with clean silk ones. 

“Where is the emperor?” 

“His majesty wanted his bride to get enough rest, he would not let anyone disturb your highness.” Unso ignores your question and pulls a black dress patterned with golden dragons from the wardrobe. She hangs it over the silk dressing screen along with several undergarments.

You watch her through the mirror as she orders servants to prepare bath water for you. You can tell that something is amiss by the way Unso will not meet your eyes and the maids scurry about as if they are terrified of you.

“Your highness,” A younger maid bows low and holds out a fresh cup of tea, “your tea?”

You take the cup from the trembling maid, it’s the same bitter tea from the night before. You take a small sip, “Unso, where is my husband?”

“Your majesty, you must drink your tea, it is good for your health.” Unso comes out from behind the dressing screen, “Come take your bath, it will soothe your sore muscles.”

“No,” You set the mostly full cup of tea on the dressing table and stand up, “Bring me my robe.”

“Your majesty, you cannot go out in only your robe!” Unso’s voice is shocked. “It is improper!”

“Fine,” You make your way behind the dressing screen and put on your undergarments, “You will help me dress and then you will take me to my husband.”

Unso and several maids help you put on the stunning black dress. You’re ushered to the dressing table where you are adorned in diamond jewelry. Unso styles your hair with a jeweled dragon hairpin. Lotions and creams are rubbed into your face, neck and arms. 

Once you are deemed presentable, you follow Unso and several servant girls to the throne room. When you reach the large doors, Eunuch Ki looks alarmed to see you and quickly bows low, “Y-your highness! What are you doing here?”

 “Eunuch Ki,” You nod your head in greeting, “I came to see my husband.”

“I see,” Eunuch Ki shares an undecipherable look with Unso, “His majesty is conducting important business, he has asked me to inform you that he will join you in his rooms later for the evening meal.”

“Open the doors.”

“Please your majesty, you need to rest.” Eunuch Ki tries to placate you, “Let me take you back to the emperor’s courtyard or even to see Princess Min.”

“Open the doors. Now.”

Eunuch Ki looks helplessly at Unso before nodding his head. The guards slowly push the heavy doors open.

The smell is the first thing that hits you. The thick coppery scent of blood. You slowly step into the room and gasp in horror. The floors and walls are covered in blood. It looks like an entire massacre took place here. You walk further into the room and ignore the way the blood soaks into your silk slippers, seeping between your toes.

Eunuch Ki follows quietly behind you. There are several servants scrubbing the floors and walls, trying to remove the pools of blood around the room. You ignore them all, your eyes are completely focused on the emperor. He’s staring at a small golden box in his hand. A bloody sword rests near his feet. 

“Yoongi.” You whisper the words quietly, but his head snaps up immediately, his eyes focusing on you. 

“Beloved.” His eyes light up when he sees you, a beautiful smile spreading across his face. He rushes eagerly towards you. You realize he’s wearing a black robe, patterned with golden dragons, the same design as your dress. The only difference is his robe is stained with fresh blood. His hair is pulled up into a topknot, his black headband in place. Small drops of blood stain his cheeks and neck. He presses the golden box into Eunuch Ki’s hands before cupping your face, his fingers still wet with blood.

“My beautiful bride,” His voice is light, happy, “everything is perfect now that you are here.”

“Perfect?” You whisper and let him take your hands, leading you towards his throne. The golden dragon throne looks intimidating in the blood soaked room. The closer you get to the throne, the stronger the scent of blood becomes. You feel light headed, your stomach churning at the smells permeating the air.

“I.. I need to sit down.”

Yoongi looks at you concerned and immediately has you sit on his throne, “Are you alright, my love? Do you need some tea?”

“No,” You sit quietly. You feel sick, you feel sweaty, you can barely catch your breath, “I just need a moment.”

You close your eyes trying to center yourself. You know something terrible happened here, there is so much blood it looks like a battlefield. You're grateful that the bodies have already been removed, you don't know how you would have handled a room full of corpses. You take a few deep breaths and open your eyes, meeting Yoongi's bright gaze.  

“I have a gift for you.” Yoongi takes the golden box from Eunuch Ki, “I wanted to surprise you with it this evening, but you are here now. My beautiful girl.”

You stare at the golden box stained with blood. You take it from Yoongi with trembling hands. Yoongi is vibrating with excitement next to you. You can feel the pressure behind your eyes signaling that you are about to cry. You blink repeatedly, holding back your tears.  

You slowly open the box and stare at the contents. Yoongi holds your hands around the golden box, making sure you can’t drop it. You swallow the scream bubbling in your throat and meet his eyes. Dark, crazed, unhinged eyes overflowing with love for you. Love and madness.

You look back at your gift. Dead, lifeless eyes stare back at you. Concubine Nam’s eyes. Yoongi kneels obediently at your feet, soaking his robe in more blood. Blood from Concubine Nam. Blood from the rest of the harem. 

You can’t stop the tears from dripping down your cheeks. 

“They are all gone. Just like you asked.” Yoongi stares at you with reverence, his eyes sparkling, “I told you I would do anything for you.”

[yesokaythatsfine69]

Man, That's Deep (Corpse Husband x reader)

Description: Y/n meets Corpse for the first time during a stream of Among Us. Things get a little chaotic from there.

Character(s): Corpse, Jacksepticeye (Sean), PewDiePie (Felix), Valkyrae (Rae), Ken, Disguised Toast (Toast)

Pov: 3rd person

Warning(s): cussing but besides that nah just a bunch of sweet stuff :)

A/n: hello! So I've recently hopped into the whole infatuation with Corpse thing, (it's kinda hard not to.) Thus I decided to write this. Hope you like it!

*none of the Gifs used are mine. Full credit goes to the maker.

A loud blast of thunder pounded the ground near y/n's house causing her to frown. Storms often rattled her, especially because she lived alone and dedicated a majority of her time to streaming and playing pretty frightening games. She tapped on her headphones and leaned back into her chair. Her eyes flashed to her server.

Is it storming here you're at?

"Yeah it's pouring down outside. Maybe it's a good time to play something else... something less terrifying." She ended the game and began to search for something else to stream.

"Any suggestions?" She asked the chat, scrolling through possibilities. Before she could pick, however, her phone buzzed. Reaching over, she picked up the device and checked it's screen. "Hold on, I got a message from Sean. Do you guys wanna watch me play some among us?"

She checked the chat. The responses were ones of excitement, as y/n rarely played among us let alone with the group that Sean played with but everytime y/n and Sean played something together things got interesting, considering how competitive the two were. Her eyes paused at a comment.

Will Corpse be there!?

She sat back in her chair, turning towards her computer. "Uhmm...I don't know actually. All I know is that they need a tenth person and I need a game to play that takes my attention away from this storm..." She began typing in the code.

"Although I've never played with him before nor have I talked to him. However-" she paused before pressing enter. "I do think it'd be cool to talk to him because he seems so kind...okay, I'm in."

She turned on the discord and unmuted, and almost instantly she was thrown into chaos. "She killed right in front of you, Felix!" Y/n's eyes widened and she looked into her camera. "Hey guys." She laughed, turning back to the game.

"Y/n!" Sean said cheerfully, ending whatever was left over from the previous game. A chorus of "y/n's" followed, until a deep baritone voice broke through. "Hello, y/n." She smiled softly at the sound, it being almost prettier than she had imagined. "It's nice to meet you guys."

"Oh yeah, y/n, I forgot you and Corpse haven't met before." Sean spoke as he changed the color of his among us character. "I've been wanting to meet you actually before this but Sean refused to give me your number." Corpse said, and y/n snorted as Sean made a gasping sound.

"That's not even-" "you know that's funny Corpse because I've been wanting to meet you too but Sean told me you didn't have phone." Y/n joined in and the group laughed. "Fuck off." Was all Sean could mumble before the game started and the screen flashed black.

Immediately muting, y/n smiled to herself. "His voice way deeper than I thought it would be. He was talking and I was like...man, that's deep." She giggled when Suddenly imposter flashed on her screen.

She bit her lip when she saw who it was with. Corpse. Their characters then fell into Mira hq, and y/n followed a group up into admin. Waiting for the bar to move until she was able to leave, and when she did she left with Felix and toast, following them into medbay.

The three entered, each going to a separate station. "So, I'm gonna kill toast first, but I gotta get these lights off first." She winked at the camera, before waiting until Rae and sykkuno also entered. Then she shut off the lights and killed. The group seemed to miss it as they hurried to turn the lights back on.

After getting the lights on, she made her way to decontamination, where she saw corpse. He had apparently been waiting for her, and they unmuted mics to speak.

"How's it going?" She laughed. "It's going. Did you need some protection?" It was Corpse's turn to laugh. "From who, we're both imposters?" They shared a laugh. "Oh my God, I killed toast like twenty minutes ago and they still haven't found him."

Corpse laughed again and y/n became dedicated to pulling that sound from his lips as much as she could. "I'll admit, they're a little slow."

Then, both Sean and Felix entered. Without uttering a word and almost in complete synchronization they double killed. Y/n giggled as they escaped, putting herself back on mute.

"This is so much fun! I love killing my friends!" Finally as she spoke that someone has found toasts body. "Medbay." Rae's cartoonish voice relayed. "Oh my, there's like five people dead." It was true, there were like five people dead. Corpse had found the time to kill two others before the double kill.

"I think- I think that it may be y/n." Sykkuno said, and y/n immediately sat up. "Why? I was in medbay with you and left before you did. Actually I think that was the last time I saw toast, was with you in medbay."

"Yeah and I've seen y/n a lot in the game. I haven't seen you sykkuno." Corpse said, coming to y/n's aid. Her cheeks reddened when he said her name. "Yeah, and you seem almost too trusting." Rae said.

Y/n smiled. "I'm voting Sykkuno. I'm not sure who the other one is, though." The four argued slightly and y/n muted. "Corpse...is so good."

She turned to the server, seeing everyone thoughts.

Wow y/n and corpse r so cute

Her cheeks reddened.

I think someone may be crushin 👀

"Guys, come on! I have just met him!" However her words were just a feeble attempt and she turned back to the game. Sykkuno was the last to vote, voting for himself.

With that, they won. Who knew how satisfying the word victory in big red letters could be. They arrived back into the lobby, where Sean immediately let them have it. "My own best friend! My own. Best. Friend. Killing me. In cold blood."

"if you don't want me to kill you play better!" Y/n jokingly shouted back. "Besides y/n and I are best friends now." Corpse spoke as he put on a flower which matched the one y/n's among us character wore.

"All I'm gonna say is that I knew her before all of you." Rae said, adding to the chaos. Y/n laughed and turned to her server.

Ooohhh are they fighting over you?

She rolled her eyes and returned to the chat. "Everytime we play with someone new you do this." Felix was complaining, also changing into the flower y/n wore.

Finally the new game was started and y/n got crew mate. It wasn't as exciting and she couldn't talk to corpse now, but it was still fun.

She got a few tasks done, and from the corner of her eye she saw toast and corpse and enter the are she was in, in reactor. "Corpse!" She said a little too excitedly. Recovering quickly she added, "And Toast!"

However part of her doubted her watchers were amused.

The lights turned off. "Damn, that was-" almost immediately she was killed by toast, probably giving her a taste of her own medicine. Immediately a hand covered her mouth and she groaned. "God fucking! What the hell toast!"

She sat in stunned silence for a second. "I guess I'll-" Corpse found her and immediately reported. "Y/N!" He laughed over his mic. "Not y/n!" "I guess that means we're the only ones left with matching flowers." Felix cut in.

"Alright who killed my best friend?" Sean said into the mic. "Wait, wait, wait. First of all- she's mine, sean-" in that moment y/n all but blacked out, but forced herself to show no reaction, lest her viewers smite her.

"and secondly. It's toast." "Toast you about to become burnt." Sean said lamely and y/n was lifted out her haze enough to snort at his bad joke. "What why is it me!?" "Because you were the last person I saw her with. It's definitely you."

Ken softly added. "I think he's right because I can't imagine corpse killing y/n." The others laughed, and y/n leaned back into her chair, slumping down.

Toast was voted out, and the game continued. Y/n was left to follow corpse around until, Felix came from behind and killed him.

"oh my God." Y/n said, laughing. Then corpse turned on his mic. "Y/n, we're both dead." She laughed again, "I know! The games definitely more boring now that we're gone."

For a few moments they spoke about the game, until y/n began telling him about the storm. "Where do you live?" "Uh, I live in Los Angeles. Usually it never storms here, though. Where do you live?"

"San Diego." She sat up. "Oh my God that's only like two hours away. We should hang sometime." He laughed. "I'd really enjoy that, y/n." "You could come up here and we could go bother some rich people. I know where James lives."

"I would love to bother rich people with you, especially James." She smiled. "Covid permitting of course." "Of course."

Finally that game ended, with them finally figuring out that it was Felix.

Y/n stretched out, and agreed to play one more game. This time she got imposter with Sean.

She laughed manically, and clapped her hands together excitedly. "This is gonna be good!" Together the two worked as a team, delightedly playing off each other. One would sabotage and the other would kill. However the two did have one weakness and it was definitely their competitive nature's.

It had become a who can kill the most players in a game contest. And y/n was now trailing behind until, finally, she found Rae and sykkuno all in the same room. Sean had followed her in and it looked like a perfect opportunity to commit a double kill. Y/n got Rae with a clean kill and Sean got sykkuno. Then in came corpse.

"fuck!" Y/n shouted, leaping from her chair "he saw us! Corpse totally saw us! Shit!" Both Sean and y/n said nothing waiting for corpse to speak. "Oh my God. Sean how could you!" For several seconds Sean didn't reply. Then he forced out a weak "what?" Corpse sighed. "He killed sykkuno right in front of me. I didn't see anyone else around."

Y/n's mouth dropped. He wasn't going to say anything. He was going to let her slide. Of course, Sean would be getting voted out but that was a small price to pay. She looked into her camera in shock.

Her server was blowing up.

He ain't gonna snitch on daddy

She covered her mouth for fear they'd hear her laugh.

Corpse suddenly became blind after watching Sean kill sykkuno

She voted poor Sean out and the game continued.

Corpse followed her around and watched as she killed more. Seemingly the last comment about him being blind was true.

Another victory was won, and y/n braced herself for the upcoming shitstorm that was the discord call. "I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU CORPSE!" Rae blasted. Y/n laughed until a loud blast of lightning shook the house and caused the lights to blink on and off. She yelped, her cat running into the room.

"wow, what was that?" Ken asked. "You okay, y/n?" Sean's voice called. She sighed. "Yeah, but I think i better log off. It was a lot of fun you guys! Thanks for letting me join."

A chorus of "yeah!" "No problem!" And "join us again!" Welcomed her. "Yeah, if y/n leaves I'm probably gonna leave too. I'll see you guys soon."

Ignoring the ohhh and aww comments of her chat she signed off.

Her phone rang and she smiled, answering it and pulling it to her ear. "Sean finally give you my number?"

Corpse laughed from the other end. "yeah, yeah. You were serious about meeting up right?" She chuckled softly. "Very." She heard him sigh happily. "Good, good. Hey if you're staying up maybe we could...chat some more?"

She smiled brightlyand her cheeks hurt. "I'd want nothing more." Suddenly her ohone buzzed and she pulled it from her ear to check. It was a message from Sean.

"you're on the phone with him right now, aren't you?"

-------------------------------------------------

A/n: please feel free to give critism and requests. Thanks for reading!

[mizukagami-takamagahara]

Noel Vermillion = Heart to Heart Wardrobe

New series because this kind of analysis is cluttering up my personal-use character docs, but I still want it somewhere!!! I’ll be taking a look at each character’s outfits.  Each character’s study will be separated into different posts for different ‘chapters’ of the story such as different games, spinoffs, or short stories, in order to keep the posts from getting too long for certain members of the cast.

When the inspiration strikes me, I’ll be considering what the outfits and any common trends suggest about the characters or the world, from an in-universe (Watsonian) perspective.  On occasion, I might take a look at what their design says from an out-of-universe (Doylist) perspective- such as how the NOL uniform is influenced by Mori’s infamous thing for backs.  I’ll be putting way, way too much thought into every little thing that I can, so if you’re interested in that, I welcome you to take a look!

As usual, Noel will be my guinea pig for this. This post will only be looking at Noel’s appearance in Heart to Heart, and will therefore only cover two outfits- her Academy Uniform and the accessories she’s shown wearing while cooking.

So let’s take a look at Noel during her first few days at the Military Academy in Torifune!  We can actually approximate the date of the scenes we’ll be looking at.  Chronologically, the first time we see Noel in her academy uniform is the same day she meets Jin Kisaragi- 5/4/2196, according to the ending of Jin’s Calamity Trigger Arcade Mode.  Presumably, then, all of Heart to Heart takes place within the May of 2196.

But I’m getting distracted.  This isn’t a timeline analysis post although I’ll probably end up doing one of those eventually.  C’mon, let’s take a look at Noel!

First, we have the concept artwork of Noel in her Academy uniform.  This is one of the Winter Uniform options available for Upper Division students at Torifune- as shown in some of Carl’s concept artwork, the Lower Division students have very different outfits.

This artwork shows a few different options for shoes and legwear-  notably, as mentioned on this page, students at Torifune can “[choose their shoes and socks] freely, but the color must be brown, navy, black, or white only.”

This can be seen ingame when looking at how Makoto and Tsubaki choose to wear their uniforms.  Further, with Tsubaki’s uniform we see that there are at least two different skirt lengths students can choose from.  As shown here, Noel wears the shorter option, which seems to be the most popular/common at the Academy.

Speculation:  For a moment I was going to mention that Noel seems to prefer shorter skirts, as we see in CP that her new outfit includes a similar one, but I actually can’t remember if that outfit was one she chose for herself or if it was given to her by a different member of the cast.  I’ll have to consider it while doing her eventual CP Wardrobe Analysis.

Secondly, we’ve seen Noel wearing a longer skirt in some concept artwork, her ‘dream’ in CF, and her ‘younger’ version shown in Amane’s Astral- though, again, now that I think about it, I’m not sure if she’s ever actually been seen to wear that outfit, or if it only shows up in theoretical scenarios.

For the time being, I do feel comfortable saying that Noel likes to wear skirts, but I won’t begin to theorize on any preference in length.

From her ingame sprite, we can see that Noel’s go-to is the white kneesocks and the brown loafers.

Unfortunately I’m having trouble uploading the sprite, so I’ll be using a screenshot from this wiki.  As previously mentioned, we see Noel wearing the typical Winter Uniform top (worn by, as far as I can tell, all 2nd Division girls until it’s time to change to the Summer Uniform) and the standard, shorter skirt option.

The tie Noel is wearing here is significant- the colors on the neckties of Torifune students seem to communicate their grade/school year.  Here, we see Noel’s tie has a green stripe, worn by Second Division First Years.  This tracks- during the events of Heart to Heart, Noel is just starting her first year at the Military Academy!

Beyond this, Noel doesn’t seem to be wearing any accessories, despite the fact that characters such as Mai, Kajun, Tsubaki, and Shiori suggest that some level of accessorizing is allowed at the academy.

Speculation:  Noel’s internal narration during the first half of Heart to Heart seems to suggest that she doesn’t want to draw a lot of attention to herself.  A comment during her meeting with Jin [1] indicates that she’d rather not run into anyone popular/with a lot of status, and a comment during her first interaction with Tsubaki [2] suggests she doesn’t want people looking at her in general.

[1] Noel:  “Phew... that was scary.  I never thought I would run into THE Jin Kisaragi in a place like this...” [2] Narration:  “[Noel] is scared of showing her own face, because she always looks like she is on the verge of tears.”

Maybe Noel’s desire to stay under the radar and not stand out too much motivates her to avoid accessorizing, despite her love of cute things.

Another thing I notice about Noel is that her hair is shorter than it’s depicted in CT, where it’s generally shown to be somewhere around her midback or her waist.  This does make sense, considering that Heart to Heart takes place roughly three years before CT (5/3196 - 12/2199.)

Here, Noel’s hair seems to be around shoulder length.  Depending on the angle it’s viewed from, some of it barely reaches her shoulders, while other sections do trail down her back an inch or two.

The last piece we’ll be looking at today is Noel during her dorm cooking!  Noel is shown wearing a white handkerchief over her hair, matches the ones worn by the other two girls.  Generally, this is done to keep a person’s hair out of the way and out of the food while they are cooking.  IRL, I don’t see this particular look in the West a lot (I more commonly see hair worn in ponytails or a hairnet used) but it is a style I see relatively commonly in Japanese media.

Speculation:  Since the girls are matching with their handkerchiefs, I like to imagine that they were given or loaned to them by the usual cafeteria staff, to use during the week they were on kitchen duty.

The apron Noel is wearing is where she’s set apart from her roommates.  She seems to be wearing a white Western-style apron with lots of frills.  While we can’t see her full body, the bottom-right corner of this image seems to suggest that her apron is relatively short- enough to cover her uniform and skirt, but not much longer.  I’ve been able to find advertisements featuring similar aprons dating back as early as the 1930s, though I’m unable to find what this particular style is called.  With the ruffled straps, it may have some relation to the pinafore aprons known to be popular among young girls in the 1940s.  Some modern aprons one can find online use a similar design, though I don’t see it often in day-to-day life.

Speculation:  The style seems to fit Noel’s known aesthetics.  We know that Noel adores ‘cute’ things, and seeing her choose a feminine apron featuring ruffles, ribbons, and a large bow in the back suits that.  Given how the aprons the girls are wearing seem notably personalized, in contrast to the handkerchiefs, I wonder if they went out and bought them ahead of time, perhaps in preparation for their punishment.

The final detail I notice is that Noel has rolled the sleeves of her uniform up to cook.  We can see that Makoto has done the same, and Tsubaki likely has as well under her long-sleeved Japense-style apron.

[messedupessy]

HERE SHE IS AT LAST, MISS RUTHIE (͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ❤

She took, way too long to finish like holy shit, she took me like over a year for some flipping reason, probably because I had some troubles getting some things how I wanted them alongside other things, but here she is at last and I am so happy with how she turned out!

This will be my last time I draw a ref pic like this, aka go full out on the colouring, as firstly you aren’t supposed to colour like this for refs which I know but I just really like to colour, and secondly it just takes way too long for me to do so, but luckily I have figured out a different way of doing these refs which will keep it easier for me and also easier for anyone who needs them refs haha!

Anyway, so very happy with how she turned out, been working on her for way too long, but fuck her design turned out so darn good and I am so damn happy with it! Very happy with her fur coat, which is actually inspired by Cruella de vil haha, and I am very happy with the colouring on her poffy shorts, as they look like a bit silky which is what I wanted! Also very happy with her hair, it took me ages to figure out a way to colour black hair how I wanted to, without like making it a bit purple or blue etc, while also making the like details visible, but I finally figured it out and I am so happy with it! So yeah, very proud of her, I love her so much haha!

So yeah enjoy!  ❤ and under the cut there will be some info about her for ya all, also feel free to send asks and ask about her if you now want to!

WARNING for some dark stuff: like drugs, sex, maybe some cannibalism hints kindaish, and a little bit of not fully consensual stuff, but nothing overly detailed!

Just as her name says, so is she a pretty damn ruthless lady, get in her way or you catch her eye, her fancy, you most likely won’t live that long whenever she gets her hands on you. She’s flirty, seductive, playful, cruel and pretty damn sadistic, she loves to toy with people, mess with them, like a cat playing with their prey, before eating them up.  

She can be incredibly charming and sweet, really good at buttering people up and get her way, manipulative as fuck, lot’s of touches when she do, a amazing liar. She’s a bit of a black widow, where if you sleep with her you might not make it out alive one way or the other, she is also not afraid to use sex and other such things to get her way.

She runs a mafia like type of drug ring, with her bakery as her front to mostly hide her shady as fuck business, although it’s not all that secret at least underground as most monsters know what she is doing, but either they are part of her clientele or they are scared absolutely shitless of her, fearful of catching one of her many eyes.  

It’s rumoured that she uses the dust of her victims/people that have caught her eye to make her drugs and baked goods, whether that is true or not is uncertain, but no one dares to question or even look into it in case it’s actually true and that they would then be next.

What is not rumoured but actually true, and is actually sort of well known, is that she do try out many of her experimental drugs she have made on anyone she finds, so watch yourself if she ever offers you anything, as it’s a very big possibility it is drugged somehow.

Kind of obvious by now, but she is a expert on drugs, on chemicals and how they work, alongside poisons and how to make even the strongest monster or human crumble at her feet frothing at the mouth after a simple taste of her drugs or poisons. She also got great knowledge how both monster and human bodies works thanks to it.

She herself is very immune to most poisons and drugs, having experimented a bit on herself to make sure she won’t fall prey to her own toys. Just in case though, and great as a bartering tool, she do carry several antidotes on her person, hidden away in her clothes and her magical inventory in her phone, but most of them are hidden in her clothes.

One of her favourite things to do to mess and fuck people over is to kiss them and make them swallow poisons and drugs that way, a kiss of death so to speak.

She got a kind of messed up crush and obsession with Edge, as he have caught her fancy, very dangerously so, but also differently to anyone else before. As she wants him badly, to ruin him, destroy him and keep him as her own, which partly is because she can’t do none of those things without most likely getting killed by a very overprotective Red.

Which she almost already did once, as when Edge was still a lieutenant and not yet captain, he was assigned by the then current captain Cackles aka fell Undyne to make a visit to Ruthie’s abode. Which then almost ended fatally for Edge as Ruthie succeeded in drugging him, and then almost had her way with him as she found him very cute and handsome, and thought why not have some fun before she dusts him, but was stopped by Red who had followed after Edge like the overprotective fuck he is.

At getting caught by Red, and finding out that not only was Edge under Red’s protection but also his literal baby brother that it was very well known he was very, very protective over, she made a very hasty retreat to safety. As Ruthie knows there are two monsters in the underground you do not mess with even when it comes to someone of her status and fearfulness, which are the King and Red, and she was now most likely on Red’s hit list.

Luckily for her, so did Edge stop Red from doing anything to her after the drugs had worn off, as without her strong grip on the drug market things would most likely fall apart and into chaos etc. Which surprised Ruthie, and now have made her very, very interested in Edge so much it’s a crush, a obsession, uncertain if it’s actual love or not, but it’s something, and it has only gotten worse since she can’t do anything to him without getting killed.

But she also can’t help but play with fire, and so she only accepts Edge to come and talk to her and not anyone else from the guard, as anyone else who have tried have not been seen again, and she even demands to have meetings with him time to time, which he unluckily can’t refuse, not even when he ends up becoming actual captain of the guard and in charge, as to him she is useful but he also finds her completely revolting and he would like to do anything but be in her presence, but he got to do what he got to do so to keep the peace, and slowly but surely make the underground a better and safer place, even if it means to work closely with a sadistic drug dealing spider monster who is crushing on him hard, although he is not aware of said crush.