#second generation amazon

[helthcareproducts]

Home Doctor

I recently purchased Home Doctor: Practical Medicine for Every Household and I'm impressed by its wealth of information.

Clear and concise guidance

The book is written in a clear and concise way, making it easy to understand even for those with no medical background. It covers a wide range of common ailments and injuries, providing step-by-step instructions for treatment at home.

Empowering knowledge

Home Doctor empowers you to take charge of your health and the well-being of your family. The knowledge gained from this book can give you peace of mind in situations where immediate medical attention may not be available.

A valuable addition to any home

I highly recommend Home Doctor to anyone who wants to be prepared for minor medical emergencies. It's a valuable addition to any home library.

Book: click here

[a-soft-fluffy-girl]

TL;DR: Steam just made library sharing so much fucking easier and so much fucking better. Instead of login-trading, it's just a simple goddamn invite.

Read this. Really. It's a good read. Because it shows that, full-stop, Valve isn't just doubling down on their stance to make sure that people can and should be able to share their copies of digital goods as easily as they can physical ones, but they're making it better and easier than ever.

But you know how Steam allowed you to, with either friends or family, link accounts with another person to be able to establish an ability to share game libraries with one another? The general gist of Steam Family Sharing was that, with a limit of five people plus you (six in total) on a limit of ten computers total could share account access to willingly mix your libraries. You could play theirs. They could play yours.

This was a huge boon. It was meant to emulate sharing a physical copy of a game. A way to allow children to play games their parents or siblings had bought without having to fork over double the cash to buy it a second game. But it had some major limitations and drawbacks, and was archaic to use.

If a person did not share the same computer, you had to manually log into that computer to give it and the accounts on it access. This wouldn't be a problem if both accounts were used on the same computer, but many households (and astronomically more family and friend groups) had multiple computers, all used by different people.

If that computer, at any point, was hard reset to any point before the sharing occurred, you lost access. And had to do the whole process again. This was also an issue with computer transfers. The whole kit and kaboodle needed to be redone on upgrades. On top of that, the old computer is now just dead weight that you may not realize you have to manually revoke access to.

Putting your account information on another person's computer opens up security issues. They could, intentionally or accidentally, land themselves on your account if the login information was stored. Which could easily lead to purchases or bans you did not want to happen.

If anyone was, at any point, playing any game on their own library, you had no access to their games. Even if it was a totally different game, you had to wait your turn as if waiting for their computer to be freed up to sit at. (Admittedly this is kind of like the "mom said it's my turn on the xbox" meme, but hey, kinda archaic.)

You could not choose whose library you accessed a game from. Not at all. It always prioritized the first library it gained access from, DLC access and multiplayer be damned. If another friend you were accepting games from had more DLC? Too bad.

And yet here we are. Steam Families Beta fixes EVERYTHING about the above issues. By just going through Settings > Interface > client Beta Participation and clicking onto Steam Families Beta? You get:

No more login sharing. No more computer links. You can now choose which person's library you borrowed from. And you can play any other game from someone's library, even while they're in-game. It just needs to be a different game than what they're playing.

Pick five people. Invite them to your family. And now everyone has access to everyone's library. My goddamn library went from 150-ish to almost a goddamn thousand in ten minutes of setup.

Account sharing and password sharing are dirty words that "lose" billions of dollars. Netflix, Hulu, Amazon, Max. They aren't game storefronts, but they still allow you to access massive libraries and scream like you murdered their firstborns for daring to share your password with your mother after you moved out.

Microsoft tried pushing to demonize and undercut used games sales and borrowed copies of physical games. Remember the first attempt to reveal the Xbox One? People forget, but these vultures tried to make an always online console that checked to see if you were the account that owned the game, even if you had a physical disc, and prevent access to the disc's contents if you weren't the original downloader.

Valve walked the fuck up. Valve tapped the mic. And Valve dropped the fucking thing right onto the ground with one feature's revamp.

About the only issues I can see with this are twofold:

If someone sharing your library gets banned from a game's servers... so do you. No one else in the family does, but the both of you do. This is... rather unpleasant, because banhammers can be dropped quite frequently by mistake. I'd urge Valve to rethink this one, but I see the logic: don't cheat and effectively bite the hand feeding you. Still making me side-eye that, though.

If you leave a family you've joined? You have to wait a YEAR to join a new one. It's to prevent people form jumping ship to another group and screwing over who's in the former one in the process, but a YEAR? OUCH.

Problems aside, though... it's probably the biggest fucking power move I have ever seen a media distributor make in the current economic climate. It's the kind of thing that would let so many new games be available in a way that's easier than ever. Just a few clicks to send or accept an invite, and bam. Permanent access to dozens or even hundreds of new games with so much more freedom than earlier drafts of the system.

It's the kind of thing that slaps you in the face with positivity after so many Ls from the games and media industries. And I'm all the fuck for a W like this.

[mostlysignssomeportents]

You should be using an RSS reader

On OCTOBER 23 at 7PM, I'll be in DECATUR, GEORGIA, presenting my novel THE BEZZLE at EAGLE EYE BOOKS.

No matter how hard we all wish it were otherwise, the sad fact is that there aren't really individual solutions to systemic problems. For example: your personal diligence in recycling will have no meaningful impact on the climate emergency.

I get it. People write to me all the time, they say, "What can I change about my life to fight enshittification, or, at the very least, to reduce the amount of enshittification that I, personally, experience?"

It's frustrating, but my general answer is, "Join a movement. Get involved with a union, with EFF, with the FSF. Tell your Congressional candidate to defend Lina Khan from billionaire Dem donors who want her fired. Do something systemic."

There's very little you can do as a consumer. You're not going to shop your way out of monopoly capitalism. Now that Amazon has destroyed most of the brick-and-mortar and digital stores out of business, boycotting Amazon often just means doing without. The collective action problem of leaving Twitter or Facebook is so insurmountable that you end up stuck there, with a bunch of people you love and rely on, who all love each other, all hate the platform, but can't agree on a day and time to leave or a destination to leave for and so end up stuck there.

I've been experiencing some challenging stuff in my personal life lately and yesterday, I just found myself unable to deal with my usual podcast fare so I tuned into the videos from the very last XOXO, in search of uplifting fare:

https://www.youtube.com/@xoxofest

I found it. Talks by Dan Olson, Cabel Sasser, Ed Yong and many others, especially Molly White:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MTaeVVAvk-c

Molly's talk was so, so good, but when I got to her call to action, I found myself pulling a bit of a face:

But the platforms do not exist without the people, and there are a lot more of us than there are of them. The platforms have installed themselves in a position of power, but they are also vulnerable…

Are the platforms really that vulnerable? The collective action problem is so hard, the switching costs are so high – maybe the fact that "there's a lot more of us than there are of them" is a bug, not a feature. The more of us there are, the thornier our collective action problem and the higher the switching costs, after all.

And then I had a realization: the conduit through which I experience Molly's excellent work is totally enshittification-proof, and the more I use it, the easier it is for everyone to be less enshittified.

This conduit is anti-lock-in, it works for nearly the whole internet. It is surveillance-resistant, far more accessible than the web or any mobile app interface. It is my secret super-power.

It's RSS.

RSS (one of those ancient internet acronyms with multiple definitions, including, but not limited to, "Really Simple Syndication") is an invisible, automatic way for internet-connected systems to public "feeds." For example, rather than reloading the Wired homepage every day and trying to figure out which stories are new (their layout makes this very hard to do!), you can just sign up for Wired's RSS feed, and use an RSS reader to monitor the site and preview new stories the moment they're published. Wired pushes about 600 words from each article into that feed, stripped of the usual stuff that makes Wired nearly impossible to read: no 20-second delay subscription pop-up, text in a font and size of your choosing. You can follow Wired's feed without any cookies, and Wired gets no information about which of its stories you read. Wired doesn't even get to know that you're monitoring its feed.

I don't mean to pick on Wired here. This goes for every news source I follow – from CNN to the New York Times. But RSS isn't just good for the news! It's good for everything. Your friends' blogs? Every blogging platform emits an RSS feed by default. You can follow every one of them in your reader.

Not just blogs. Do you follow a bunch of substackers or other newsletters? They've all got RSS feeds. You can read those newsletters without ever registering in the analytics of the platforms that host them. The text shows up in black and white (not the sadistic, 8-point, 80% grey-on-white type these things all default to). It is always delivered, without any risk of your email provider misclassifying an update as spam:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/10/10/dead-letters/

Did you know that, by default, your email sends information to mailing list platforms about your reading activity? The platform gets to know if you opened the message, and often how far along you've read in it. On top of that, they get all the private information your browser or app leaks about you, including your location. This is unbelievably gross, and you get to bypass all of it, just by reading in RSS.

Are your friends too pithy for a newsletter, preferring to quip on social media? Unfortunately, it's pretty hard to get an RSS feed from Insta/FB/Twitter, but all those new ones that have popped up? They all have feeds. You can follow any Mastodon account (which means you can follow any Threads account) via RSS. Same for Bluesky. That also goes for older platforms, like Tumblr and Medium. There's RSS for Hacker News, and there's a sub-feed for the comments on every story. You can get RSS feeds for the Fedex, UPS and USPS parcels you're awaiting, too.

Your local politician's website probably has an RSS feed. Ditto your state and national reps. There's an RSS feed for each federal agency (the FCC has a great blog!).

Your RSS reader lets you put all these feeds into folders if you want. You can even create automatic folders, based on keywords, or even things like "infrequently updated sites" (I follow a bunch of people via RSS who only update a couple times per year – cough, Danny O'Brien, cough – and never miss a post).

Your RSS reader doesn't (necessarily) have an algorithm. By default, you'll get everything as it appears, in reverse-chronological order.

Does that remind you of anything? Right: this is how social media used to work, before it was enshittified. You can single-handedly disenshittify your experience of virtually the entire web, just by switching to RSS, traveling back in time to the days when Facebook and Twitter were more interested in showing you the things you asked to see, rather than the ads and boosted content someone else would pay to cram into your eyeballs.

Now, you sign up to so many feeds that you're feeling overwhelmed and you want an algorithm to prioritize posts – or recommend content. Lots of RSS readers have some kind of algorithm and recommendation system (I use News, which offers both, though I don't use them – I like the glorious higgeldy-piggeldy of the undifferentiated firehose feed).

But you control the algorithm, you control the recommendations. And if a new RSS reader pops up with an algorithm you're dying to try, you can export all the feeds you follow with a single click, which will generate an OPML file. Then, with one click, you can import that OPML file into any other RSS reader in existence and all your feeds will be seamlessly migrated there. You can delete your old account, or you can even use different readers for different purposes.

You can access RSS in a browser or in an app on your phone (most RSS readers have an app), and they'll sync up, so a story you mark to read later on your phone will be waiting for you the next time you load up your reader in a browser tab, and you won't see the same stories twice (unless you want to, in which case you can mark them as unread).

RSS basically works like social media should work. Using RSS is a chance to visit a utopian future in which the platforms have no power, and all power is vested in publishers, who get to decide what to publish, and in readers, who have total control over what they read and how, without leaking any personal information through the simple act of reading.

And here's the best part: every time you use RSS, you bring that world closer into being! The collective action problem that the publishers and friends and politicians and businesses you care about is caused by the fact that everyone they want to reach is on a platform, so if they leave the platform, they'll lose that community. But the more people who use RSS to follow them, the less they'll depend on the platform.

Unlike those largely useless, performative boycotts of widely used platforms, switching to RSS doesn't require that you give anything up. Not only does switching to RSS let you continue to follow all the newsletters, webpages and social media accounts you're following now, it makes doing so better: more private, more accessible, and less enshittified.

Switching to RSS lets you experience just the good parts of the enshitternet, but that experience is delivered in manner that the new, good internet we're all dying for.

My own newsletter is delivered in fulltext via RSS. If you're reading this as a Mastodon or Twitter thread, on Tumblr or on Medium, or via email, you can get it by RSS instead:

https://pluralistic.net/feed/

Don't worry about which RSS reader you start with. It literally doesn't matter. Remember, you can switch readers with two clicks and take all the feeds you've subscribed to with you! If you want a recommendation, I have nothing but praise for Newsblur, which I've been paying $2/month for since 2011 (!):

https://newsblur.com/

Subscribing to feeds is super-easy, too: the links for RSS feeds are invisibly embedded in web-pages. Just paste the URL of a web-page into your RSS reader's "add feed" box and it'll automagically figure out where the feed lives and add it to your subscriptions.

It's still true that the new, good internet will require a movement to overcome the collective action problems and the legal barriers to disenshittifying things. Almost nothing you do as an individual is going to make a difference.

But using RSS will! Using RSS to follow the stuff that matters to you will have an immediate, profoundly beneficial impact on your own digital life – and it will appreciably, irreversibly nudge the whole internet towards a better state.

Tor Books as just published two new, free LITTLE BROTHER stories: VIGILANT, about creepy surveillance in distance education; and SPILL, about oil pipelines and indigenous landback.

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/10/16/keep-it-really-simple-stupid/#read-receipts-are-you-kidding-me-seriously-fuck-that-noise

[headspace-hotel]

There was this post a while ago where somebody was saying that Cheetahs aren't well suited to Africa and would do well in Midwestern North America, and it reminded me of Paul S. Martin, the guy I'm always pissed off about.

He had some good ideas, but he is most importantly responsible for the overkill hypothesis (idea that humans caused the end-Pleistocene extinctions and that climate was minimally a factor) which led to the idea of Pleistocene rewilding.

...Basically this guy thought we should introduce lions, cheetahs, camels, and other animals to North America to "rewild" the landscape to what it was like pre-human habitation, and was a major advocate for re-creating mammoths.

Why am I pissed off about him? Well he denied that there were humans in North America prior to the Clovis culture, which it's pretty well established now that there were pre-Clovis inhabitants, and in general promoted the idea that the earliest inhabitants of North America exterminated the ecosystem through destructive and greedy practices...

...which has become "common knowledge" and used as evidence for anyone who wants to argue that Native Americans are "Not So Innocent, Actually" and the mass slaughter and ecosystem devastation caused by colonialism was just what humans naturally do when encountering a new environment, instead of a genocidal campaign to destroy pre-existing ways of life and brutally exploit the resources of the land.

It basically gives the impression that the exploitative and destructive relationship to land is "human nature" and normal, which erases every culture that defies this characterization, and also erases the way indigenous people are important to ecosystems, and promotes the idea of "empty" human-less ecosystems as the natural "wild" state.

And also Martin viewed the Americas' fauna as essentially impoverished, broken and incomplete, compared with Africa which has much more species of large mammals, which is glossing over the uniqueness of North American ecosystems and the uniqueness of each species, such as how important keystone species like bison and wolves are.

It's also ignoring the taxa and biomes that ARE extraordinarily diverse in North America, for example the Appalachian Mountains are one of the most biodiverse temperate forests on Earth, the Southeastern United States has the Earth's most biodiverse freshwater ecosystems, and both of these areas are also a major global hotspot for amphibian biodiversity and lichen biodiversity. Large mammals aren't automatically the most important. With South America, well...the Amazon Rainforest, the Brazilian Cerrado and the Pantanal wetlands are basically THE biodiversity hotspot of EVERYTHING excepting large mammals.

It's not HIM I have a problem with per se. It's the way his ideas have become so widely distributed in pop culture and given people a muddled and warped idea of ecology.

If people think North America was essentially a broken ecosystem missing tons of key animals 500 years ago, they won't recognize how harmful colonization was to the ecosystem or the importance of fixing the harm. Who cares if bison are a keystone species, North America won't be "fixed" until we bring back camels and cheetahs...right?

And by the way, there never were "cheetahs" in North America, Miracinonyx was a different genus and was more similar to cougars than cheetahs, and didn't have the hunting strategy of cheetahs, so putting African cheetahs in North America wouldn't "rewild" anything.

Also people think its a good idea to bring back mammoths, which is...no. First of all, it wouldn't be "bringing back mammoths," it would be genetically engineering extant elephants to express some mammoth genes that code for key traits, and second of all, the ecosystem that contained them doesn't exist anymore, and ultimately it would be really cruel to do this with an intelligent, social animal. The technology that would be used for this is much better used to "bring back" genetic diversity that has been lost from extant critically endangered species.

I think mustangs should get to stay in North America, they're already here and they are very culturally important to indigenous groups. And I think it's pretty rad that Scimitar-horned Oryx were brought back in their native habitat only because there was a population of them in Texas. But we desperately, DESPERATELY need to re-wild bison, wolves, elk, and cougars across most of their former range before we can think about introducing camels.

[mittendad]

Hey Tumblr fam! 😍🎧 Just found out that the Second Gen Amazon Echo Buds are currently 33% off! That's right, you can snag these awesome earbuds at a huge discount! Don't miss this opportunity to upgrade your audio game. They're perfect for music lovers, workout enthusiasts, and everyone in between.

🔥 Remember, this deal won't last forever, so act fast!

[darnell-la]

Can you guys please do another fic about Logan and the bartender I’m so hooked on your page🫶🏾

pairing: sub soon dom!logan howlett x bartender!reader

warnings: heavy drinking, attachment issues, heavily drink, lots of begging, oral (fem receiving), face riding while standing up, orgasm, overstimulation, dominance, submission, scratching, choking, rough fuck, cream pie, baby trapping, etc.

note: Logan feels like he needs to be more of a man. he’ll get to that after he submits to his pretty girl.

———

Logan and y/n have been in a talking stage for a month now. The man would come to her work every day, bringing lunch and sitting in the building until she clocked out, and then they’d make their way over to the bar across the street.

Getting y/n drunk was something Logan loved seeing. She was so wild, loose, and beautiful. She got along well with Wade, and of course with Vanessa.

Logan thought that maybe he’d pick up his dominance by getting her so wasted, that he could do whatever he wanted to her, letting her know he was the one in charge, and not her.

Even though he loved the way she ducked him dry that night, he felt like he had to be more of a man. He grew up in different generations where being a man was something that he needed to be.

Every single time Wade brought y/n back him, he failed. She was so damn convincing when she begged to ride him or suck him until he saw stars.

At first, he thought he won the dominance title because she’d be the one on her knees submitting to him, but by the end of the night, he was the own squirming around and begging for more or for her to take it easy on him — “please,”.

Tonight’s another night where Logan took the girl home. She’s drunk, but not as drunk as he wanted her to be. Instead, he was the one who drank too much.

“Why won’t you let me move in?” Logan whined as he leaned back on her apartment door, closing it behind him. Y/n giggled as she bent over to take her shoes off, then his.

“You’re the one that said you didn’t want to move in too early. Said you wanted to make more money and move us out somewhere away from people,” y/n reminded the man, but he wasn’t fully thinking right either way.

“Well, that’s stupid! I-I can take the TVA money and escape from this place. With you,” the man said as y/n helped him to her room, which is basically his room as well since he’s stayed over almost every night since they met.

“I told you not to use your hero money on me, babe. They gave that to you to save and spend for yourself,” Y/n reminded him about that as well.

“B-But, I am doing this for me. Wanting you around me all day is way better without seeing you work behind the counter while I’m just fucking- fucking declining Amazon orders like some robot!”

Y/n had gotten Logan a job. An online job since he whined about wanting to be around he more. All the man had to do was decline the few hundred orders that came through every week, but that was too much for him.

The man talked to her about moving out to the country where he could chop wood for a living, and she could watch him do so while drinking coffee or tea.

Y/n felt off about that idea because Logan was a superhero. An old one at that, and he didn’t need to be working, right? Sometimes she doesn’t consider his strength, but at the end of the day, she feels like she should be the one working.

“Baby, let’s just take this slow, okay? You haven’t even gotten your second paycheck — They pay you monthly and you got a good check a few days ago, right?” Y/n asked the man as he finally sat down on her bed where she put him.

“Yes,” he pouted, not wanting to argue about that money he received. He spent a lot of it on y/n already. Buying her new clothes, shoes, cooking objects, and more. He loved her cooking.

“Alright then,” y/n smiled at the man with a shake of her head. He always worried, but he didn’t have to. Y/n felt good where she was at, but Logan had been planning with Wade already.

Wade didn’t see a such thing in a talking stage between them in the first place, so when Logan came to him, planning to move forty-five minutes out to a nice new cabin and getting that wood-cutting job, Wade was all the way in.

“Using all that money to impress a girl you just met — Sounds like a damn good plan, peanuts,” was all Wade could say. He loved this for Logan, and if he had to bully and make y/n feel bad for not accepting it, he would.

“Let’s get you undressed, baby. We’ll shower tomorrow since I have to change the sheets anyway,” y/n spoke in her soft and sweet voice as she undressed the huge man.

He was a big baby, and he’d always think about that. Even now, he couldn’t help it. He loved being taken care of like this. Having a job and providing a cabin is something he had to do eventually, but letting y/n baby him, was something he could deal with.

“Are you gonna undress too?” The man asked, eyes barely being able to stay open a focused on hers. His hands reached up and tugged on the girl's shirt, wanting to help her just like she helped him.

“Yes, I am,” y/n silently laughed at the man and helped him get her undressed. “So pretty, y/n,” Logan said as soon as y/n’s bra came off. The man grabbed her breasts softly, moving them around as she took her shorts and panties off.

“Logan, not tonight. I’ve gotta work,” y/n spoke as his hands traveled the girl's body and his lips attached to a nipple. “Logan,” y/n rolled her eyes but soon gasped at the instant pleasurable feeling.

“Please, just a little,” the man looked up at her, sucking on her toy with need. “Logan, I’m so tired, and you’re too drunk,” Y/n spoke to him like he didn’t understand, but he did. His reaction was just a bit slow.

“Please, y/n — Please,” the man begged with a low growl, fingers digging into her waist. Y/n stood there for a while, looking down at the man who continued sucking, and leaving love marks.

“Fine, but only for a little,” y/n said, thinking of what he could do for her to make her stay up longer than she wished. “Get on your knees, baby,” y/n said as she stepped back.

Logan looked at the woman, confused and a bit sad his mouth wasn’t on her skin anymore. “C‘mon, we ain’t got all night,” y/n said. Logan did as told and got on his knees without thinking.

“S-Sorry,” he said, cussing himself out that he didn’t listen the first time. His girl asked him something, and he just looked at her like a deer in headlights. So fuckin’ stupid.

“Want you to make me cum,” y/n said after she spread her legs right in front of his face. The man looked up at the young lady, eyes traveling from her eyes all the way down to her cunt.

The man slightly whined as he leaned in, not taking another second to dive into her cunt. He instantly began slurping, taking in the wetness she had been hiding tonight.

“Ah- That’s it,” Y/n said, tangling her hands in his hair and then pulling him closer, now rubbing his mouth in the right places. “Mhm hm?” Logan asked muffled, wanting to make sure he was doing good for her.

“Oh, yes, baby — Always eat me so well,” y/n looked down at the older man, locking eyes with him as he kept sucking in the right spot.

You would think y/n would be the one rolling her eyes, but the one doing the rolling was Logan. After making eye contact with the pretty lady, he couldn’t help himself.

His mind was foggy, and he felt like he was drunk. Almost like he was pussy drunk, but there’s no way, right? Fuck it — There definitely was a way. He’s always this drunk for her. He needs her.

“So hot under me — Might take a picture and keep it in my wallet,” y/n said, making the man groan into her heat. Y/n’s knees bucked, instantly making her feel her cunt pulse.

“S-So close, baby — So close,” y/n gave a heads up, only making the man groan more into her cunt. He was going to cum himself. He knew he’d feel embarrassed about it right after, but right now, he needed it.

“S-Shit,” y/n’s legs almost gave out, but luckily Logan wrapped his arms around her, keeping her up and pinned onto his face. “Fuck, Logan, fuck!” the girl tugged on his hair before right as she released on his face.

The man slightly pulled away, making sure her juice would leak right out of her and into his mouth as much as it could.

Y/n’s clit throbbed hard, feeling amazing like any other night as Logan’s vision blurred, cock twitched, and in seconds, he came.

The older man buried his face into the girl's heat, muffling his own moans as he shook from the hard orgasm he didn’t know he could experience.

Y/n cried out, trying to pull the man off, but he was too lost in his own high. “L-Logan!” Y/n cried out with a crack as an aftershock hit her. Her cunt throbbed harder than usual, making her eyes cross in a way that she’s never done before.

The loud moan she let out only made Logan feel the need to do more, so he did.

The man pulled away from the girl and threw her on the bed after he stood to his feet. “L-Logan, fuck,” Y/n said, trying to catch her breath, but it didn’t take long for the man to hover over her.

“Need to fill you,” the man said, now crawling in between her legs. “No, Logan — I-I can’t anymore,” the young lady shook her head as she leaned her head back, trying to rest.

“Well, I can,” the man said before plunging into her, giving her no warning. Y/n’s loud moan filled the room as he groaned in her neck, thrusting his hips at an ungodly paste. He needed to fill her.

“L-Lo!” Y/n cried, overstimulated, but the man couldn’t think straight. He felt so fucking good, and he knew she did too.

Logan’s breathing sounded deep. Deep and animalistic as his hands grabbed the young lady's thighs on the side, scratching upwards until he heard a pleasure cry escape her mouth.

“So fucking good, baby. Need this every fucking day. No breaks!” The man said, one hand now digging into her waist as the other gripped her neck. He finally had her where he wanted.

“So fuckin’ dumb to let yourself be like this. All drunk and overstimulated. It’s my turn to dominate, baby. Mine!” Logan gripped the girl's neck, watching her jaw slack and eyes roll back.

“Gonna buy that fucking land and take that damn job. You’re gonna sit your pretty ass at him or in my truck and watch me. No more working. No more being away from me. You’re fuckin’ mine,”

Y/n wanted to say yes to everything he mentioned, feeling like she had no choice, and she didn’t. He wanted this, so she had to give it to him. She had to and needed to.

“That’s it, baby — Cum,” Logan’s voice echoed through the girl's head as her walls clenched onto him. “Fuckin’ cum,” the man spat, looking down at her as his hips snapped forward. She swears he’s about to break her.

“C-Can’t anymore,” the young girl cried, but who cared? Not him. What he said, goes. This side of being drunk felt good. The horniness after being on his knees for her, was a boost before his cock begged to feel her walls. He needed the second climax to be in her.

“L-Logan — You don’t have a condom-“ y/n tried saying, but her orgasm stopped her. The young girl cried and whined loudly, her voice sounding crackly as she came all over his cock.

Y/n was the one who suggested a condom. She didn't want the man to regret anything. Logan told her for months that he regretted nothing and never will. Night, he'll prove that to her.

“Gonna fill you up, baby — Make you unemployed,” the man threatened, but it didn’t sound too much like a threat to y/n. She wanted it, rather she was drunk on his cock or completely sober through the day.

“Fuck, yes!” The man growled through his teeth, feeling himself get closer with every thrust. “Tell me to cum in you, baby — Tell me!” The mutant man demanded the warn-out human.

“C-Cum,” y/n tried saying as her head moved side to side slowly, trying to gain her vision back, but everything was spinning. “More — More!” He demanded again. “C-Cum in m-me,” she finally got out.

Logan groaned loudly, cock pushing deep inside of the woman as his grip on her waist and neck tightened. She swore she could feel him actually filling her up until she couldn’t take anymore.

“Fuck!” He shouted, slowly pulling out and looking down. His cock was coated with so much of him and her, and she leaked so much of her and him. This was perfect. She was perfect, and now she was staying with him forever.

[lady-raziel]

It's time...we're edging the sleep

Link to the full pdf document HERE (includes links)

What This Is:

A collaborative, grassroots initiative for fans of Markiplier and The Edge of Sleep to promote the newly released TV show on Amazon Prime Video to raise awareness and generate attention that will drive supporters and casual viewers alike to watch the show.

Why This Exists:

Fans of the hit podcast and followers of Markiplier (Mark Fischbach) have been anticipating the TV adaptation for years since it was announced in 2021 and have been waiting to watch the show since then. However, after radio silence since nearly after filming completed, the long-awaited show is now being dropped on Amazon Prime early—before any official promotion starts.

Many fans disagree with the confusing treatment of an adaptation they have been wanting to watch for years, the haphazard amount of pre-release promotion for the show, and the increasingly high benchmarks of instant success placed on creative material, regardless of origin, that challenges the ability of new ideas and stories to thrive and grow.

This collection of suggested guiding materials is intended to serve as a starting point for fans and advocates in taking matters into our own hands and promoting the show we want to succeed, to open doors for future creative projects for all sorts of innovators, and to bring attention to the current challenging creative environment that stifles new projects before they have a chance to shine.

CRITICAL TAKEAWAY (if you read nothing else):

Stream The Edge of Sleep on Amazon Prime Video if you can and TALK ABOUT THE SHOW. Talk about it and anything else covered in this guide as much as you can, because every bit of chatter matters in allowing this project to succeed.

(More info on steps you can take to help under the page break, or check out the full doc linked above for everything!)

Most Important Steps To Take:

Stream The Edge of Sleep on Amazon Prime Video, as well as add it to your watchlist and like the show on the platform to enhance performance metrics.

The full pdf document has information later on detailing how to access Amazon Prime Video as well as information on low-cost pricing and deals for gaining access to Prime Video, and how to use “Watch Party” mode to stream with others.

You can “like” the show even if you don’t have Prime Video and just have a basic Amazon account! Even small metrics like this impact both the front and backend impressions viewed by corporate employees.

Use the hashtags #TheEdgeofSleep and #TheEdgeofSleeponPrime on social media sites where hashtags are applicable in sharing material about the show. Share or make anything you can—memes, art, discussions of the story, pictures, edits, or even just posts saying you’re watching the show. Truly, it all matters and helps!

It’s important to use both tags or at the very least, the second one indicating the streaming platform. It identifies WHAT the show is and WHERE to find it, which is helpful information for those stumbling across The Edge of Sleep for the first time. Additionally, using the name of the platform frequently attracts attention for Prime Video, which can reflect back positively on the show in the eyes of the company if The Edge of Sleep is the source of the discussion.

Although it can be laborious to type out “The Edge of Sleep” every time and thus impulse says to abbreviate in both discussion and hashtags to “TEOS/teos,” this can hinder effectiveness as it is not a recognizable acronym to non-fans and might impact the potential of the full “The Edge of Sleep” title to trend on any social platform.

Share the show with anyone and everyone you think would like it, offline and in person. A personal recommendation will always be more impactful than any ad—everyone is an “influencer” to someone! Also, be sure to rate the show or add it to your watchlist anywhere you can—including on Amazon Prime Video itself through the like function on the show page, as well as on third-party sites like IMDB or TV Guide.

Not sure how to recommend the show to someone? The brief synopsis, “fast facts,” and “pitch” suggestions in the HELPFUL REFERENCE section of the full pdf document might help, along with thoughts of enthusiasm for the show, original podcast, or any of Mark’s other projects mixed in!

Sites like IMDB allow you to rate shows and films for free, even if you haven’t gotten the chance to watch them yet.

Most Important Thing To Remember:

JUST HAVE FUN!!! This is about promoting the show we’ve waited for and want to succeed, opening the door for more projects we want to see, but also just about getting together as a community and making cool stuff!

Again, you can find all this info and more resources in the full Strategy doc linked here. Go forth and sleedge △

[woodland-gremlin]

Ghostly Parents AU

An AU where Jason was ghost adopted after he died. His resurrection caused his ghost parent a lot of grief. First their kid was brought back to life, having to dig out of his own grave which is extremely traumatic. Second he was kidnapped by a bunch of cultists. Thirdly, said cultist dumped him in contaminated ectoplasm, giving his ecto-posioning. Fourthly they tried to brainwash him and generally treat him horribly. To say that Jason's parent was furious was putting it mildly.

Now depending on the ghostly parent the methods to get him back and how they raise him differ. There is plenty of ghost parents to choose from. There is Frostbite, who would probably just show up and ignore everyone while he treats Jason for ecto-posioning. Depending on who they were he might heal others. He would also do something to the pits just because of how dangerous they are, unknowingly single handily wrecking the League by doing so.

Fright Knight would probably challenge Ras for kidnapping his son/squire, sending him to the nightmare dimension.

Ghost Writer would force the whole League into a book of Jason's choosing forever.

Pandora would charge and seize the League, forcing them to face Amazon justice.

And that is just how they would bring him back, raising him is a totally different matter. Frostbite is pretty chill, ha, but would insist on teaching him the basics of first aide. This could lead Jason to becoming a Doctor that Alfred always wanted in the family because of how well it feeds into his protection obsession. This also leads Jason to meet "The Great One" the yetis always talk about. Whether he joins the yetis in their religion like in one of @long-live-astronerd-ghost-king 's post ( https://www.tumblr.com/long-live-astronerd-ghost-king/742150810600947712?source=share ) or tease Danny about it relentlessly is up to you.

With Fright Knight he would be a squire to him. Jason easily settles into this role because it reminds him of what he did with Batman. All he really did was trade one Dark Knight for another. Like "Afterlife" by batling_out_of_hell on Ao3. Training might kick up a notch because of the kidnapping though. This is also how he meets Danny. Since he is training under Fright Knight who is Danny's knight, this leads to some romance of a knight and his king.

Ghost Writer and Jason would get along like house on fire. They often spend their days writing and reading. Ghost Writer also is very supportive of Jason getting to finish his education. He is not so supportive of Jason's relationship with Danny. He doesn't say anything because of how happy Danny makes Jason but he certainly does not like it, at least at first.

With Pandora he originally had a small fan girl moment because she's related to Wonder Woman! He gets along great with the other Greeks, sparring and having philosophical debates. He meets Danny when he comes for his weekly tea time with Pandora, who later coos about how great they look together.

[neil-gaiman]

Hi Neil,

I hope this doesn't get buried in the ask box, but if it does, I'll still be glad I sent this, just to know this little lengthy slice of complement and thanks existed in your inbox is enough. I apologize for the length, I am pretty sure the grammar is in tatters...and probably just the general awkwardness in advance.

Frist of all, congratulations for Good Omens Season2, it's a roaring success even here in this...I don't know, bottomless pit? I myself and some others fondly call it the PRC. The show didn't made pass the firewall officially, neither was Prime Video. People still managed to watch it eventually by VPNs, shared accounts and when times are desperate...sorry, piracy. Chinese fans, including myself, using every tool in the shed to try to fool Amazon™ and our goverment, just to watch this on Prime and try to help to manifest S3, is one hell of an experience. This kind of experience is pathetic, ridiculous....and somehow hilarious in a dark, gallows humor way, almost like some bad spy comedy, I just have to share it. Worth all the trouble by the way, the reward at the end of the back channel is...well, some divine comedy to say the very least. All in all, it's a brilliant show and a solid job well-done.

Then some of my personal gratitude. They say good art resonates with your soul, I now know this is just as true as matter and gravity. Since I know Good Omens certainly resonated with mine. I'll redact the typical "depression and anxiety reduced me to a husk, a shadow of my former self" story and get to the result for brevity's sake. I can't write anything meaningful while I know I took joy in writing, I can't finish reading anything longer than a brochure while I know I was such a bookworm in the past. Then I was compelled to get up in the middle of the night, wrote a full 5000 character long analysis after marathoned S2, and then write even more analyses in both Chinese and English. I picked up American Gods because I know I need more Neil Gaiman in my life and then impressed by myself for actually finishes it the second time 5 years later. I didn't know how exactly that happened through one watch of a TV show, but I know I am changed for the better. I grasped life again, and can start living again, somehow. The resonation just keeps on giving.

This is a quiet, gentle and romantic story, it is soothing, accepting, filled to the brim with love and kindness, and it makes me feel safe and accepted and loved in a way I never felt before. I thank you for it, and hope thart I may have the privlige to witness more of this miracle. Thank you Neil, Sir Terry Pratchett and the team for this miraculous book and this miraculous show.

谢谢。(I just had to say thanks with my mother tongue, it feels more earnest this way)

Thank you so much! I'm impressed by everything you and your countryfolk have gone through to watch it as legitimately as you could.

[couldeatthatgirlforlunch]

can you do some headcanons about no nut november with the league? like how long they would last??

i love your writing and thank you🙏🏻😭

This can be for both my series A Day in Life to just regular JL X Reader scenario, and both yandere and not yandere

Superman:

He could last three weeks if he wanted to, honestly

Like, if he's single, and not in love

But if you guys are together? The first week he has sex with you

Less than 7 days, I think, he won't deny you if you want to have sex

Batman:

He accidentally lasts two weeks

Accidentally? How so? Well, let me explain

I don't think Canon!Bruce is taking time off his very strict routine just to masturbate, so he probably just loses when he has to keep appearances for the public and have to go on a date with someone famous

Unless he's in love with you, then he masturbates on the second week, I give him 10 days

And if he's dating you? Pff, doesn't last enough to the end of the first week, five days maybe

Wonder Woman:

If this woman was actually into this dumb silly challenge, you can be sure she would win

Even if she's seduced

But Diana Prince, Princess of Themyscira, Amazon born from Clay, Daughter of Hippolyta and Zeus, one of the greatest heroes on Earth

Why would she do that?

Especially if someone catches her attention…

Could be anywhere from a day to a month, indifferent loss to accidental win

Green Lantern:

A week

Canon!Hal Jordan dates a lot, so you can't tell me his sex drive isn't high

And if he's with you and someone reminds him about this challenge? Doesn't make it 24 hours, just to rub it in the face of the people who are actually trying to win this thing

Like, you're there suffering while I'm here getting laid every time I can😘😜

But he's also Green Lantern, his will power is so strong that in canon, when he gives up his ring, and doesn't want to be part of the lantern cops anymore, a situation where he needed to save himself happens, and his mind creates a new ring, one that seems even more powerful than regular lantern rings

So if he wanted to, he would win

Flash:

His body could take the challenge, I think, fast metabolism and all

Fanfic writers be like: fast metabolism🔥horny all the time😈

But in reality, his body is acting so fast that he goes from horny to not horny in a matter of milliseconds, so he doesn't feel anything unless he slows down

But his mind?

If he's in love and dating?

You seduce him and he's gone, he's not gonna say no

And fight crime wouldn’t stop him, he can be back in a flash

So, depends on you, I think

Aquaman:

Three days, unapologetic

Wants you? Fucks you

You don't want him back? That's fine, he will just masturbate

He's actually smug that he "lost", like Hal Jordan

The real winner is actually the real loser if you think about it

Martian Manhunter:

I don't see him as a very sexual being, tbh

Like, he could go the whole month

But if someone wants to have sex with him? Then he will do it

Three weeks

General Masterlist

Like, comment and reblog 🥰

[theriverbeyond]

believing in everything (and knowing nothing at all) by @lesbianjesuslovesyou

A series of childhood memories from the Ninth.

I love this fic, it makes me ACHE for baby Gideon, and I love its exploration of Gideon's dynamics with the other characters on the Ninth as she was growing up :') this is the second fic I bound for @renegadeguild's Fanfic Writers Appreciation Day event!

Fandom: The Locked Tomb

Pairing: Aiglamene & Gideon, Gideon & Crux, Gideon & Harrow

Title font: Supernova

Body font: Garamond

Pages: 200

Size: Quarto letter

Case: Pleather book cloth (Generic amazon brand) with sword shaped cut out and hand-embossed gold foil

Endpapers: Skull Natural Copper by HimalDesign

progress pics and ramblings below the cut!

I was SO excited to try a cutout cover for this, and think the endpapers I picked were perfect for it. The Pleather "bookcloth" I used was a bit thick, and that in combination with the shape of the cut out made for some very goofy progress pics. I ended up gluing scrap paper to the tiny flaps, because they were SO at parts.

Also, there were definitely several places that were like... exposed chipboard/paper, so I used a marker to color it in to hide those issues and it worked great

I initially formatted the cover incorrectly and my printer was out of commission at the time so I couldn't re-print it, so I just cut it up to frankenstien it into what I needed! I'm REALLY happy with how the sword cutout ended up lining up with the skull -- you can see in the above photos that they aren't identical, and this is because I did not think about this at all when cutting and gluing the endpaper in. OOPS!! anyway HOORAY luck was looking out for me bc it ended up looking great anyway!

The color of the cover was honestly hard to photograph but I love how it turned out and how it looked IRL. YAYY

[petermorwood]

Recently I got roped (ha) into an Age of Sail roleplay, and decided I wanted to play the ship's cook. I then realized I don't know too much about provisioning a ship in the Age of Sail! I figured you'd be the sort of fellow to know where I could find resources on that kind of information though?

Well, for a start I recommend sending a similar Ask to @ltwilliammowett (Beat To Quarters) who knows far more about The Age of Sail / Wooden Ships & Iron Men subject than I do.

*****

In the meanwhile here are a couple of books, both of which you may well be able to get through your library, or buy pretty cheaply for your research library. They're also an entertaining read.

The first was recommended to me by Terry Pratchett - "'If you haven't read it, you should!" - when we were at a con together and he was researching "Nation".

It's "Feeding Nelson's Navy" by Janet MacDonald, available here as an ebook and from Amazon as a Kindle Unlimited free read.

The second is "Lobscouse & Spotted Dog" by Anne Chotzinoff Grossman & Lisa Grossman Thomas.

Funny how both books use the same period image - "Shipmates Carousing Below Decks" by William Pyne - as cover art.

"Lobscouse" deals with the same period as "Navy", while also being the author-approved official cookbook of Patrick O'Brian's "Aubrey / Maturin" novels.

Here's a Reddit about making dishes from it, and here's a blog page about making Spotted Dog and why Suet Makes a Difference.

I've already posted about the role correct cooking fats play in making traditional dishes "taste right", and since Atora brand makes both carnivore and vegetarian suets, it's worth tracking down.

Here's a blog page which summarises the Age of Sail diet - think of it as an exam crib to tide you over until you get the books and learn more.

*****

Here's Max Miller of "Tasting History" making lobscouse:

And here are Dylan Hollis and Max making that ubiquitous on-board delicacy and culinary ingredient, ship's biscuit (hardtack / hard-tack / hard tack).

Something very similar was still issued as a ration item at the beginning of the 20th century and into World War One. J.R.R. Tolkien would certainly have encountered Biscuits, Ration, H&P, Army No.4...

...and may well have used them as a basis for the waybread "cram" as mentioned in "The Hobbit" and "The Lord of the Rings". This description has the ring (hah!) of familiarity about it.

"If you want to know what cram is, I can only say that I don’t know the recipe; but it is biscuitish, keeps good indefinitely, is supposed to be sustaining, and is certainly not entertaining, being in fact very uninteresting except as a chewing exercise." "The Hobbit" ch.13, "Not at Home"

No.4 biscuits were so hard that soldiers could use them as substitutes for wood...

...and Nelson's sailors probably did the same with theirs.

*****

Terry Pratchett took this wooden quality and - with the dial turned up to eleven - transformed it into the rocky quality of Dwarf bread.

Here's a health nut's real-life version of a healthy nut loaf...

...while this is an example of sedimentary conglomerate rock.

With a bit of judicious cropping, the captions could be swapped and a casual glance would never notice.

Of course this post wouldn't be complete without a certain GIF.

So...

*****

To finish, a few links to more video.

One (12 years ago).

Two - 1 year, including some of the ship's biscuit made in that first one (!)

Three - also 1 year, featuring other dishes - pease pudding ("dog's body"), lobscouse and plum duff. Oh, and ship's biscuit ...

Those are from Townsends, another great source for 18th century food and cooking.

This last example is by Dan Snow, in an extract from a longer History Hits documentary, and is a short general overview of period Navy rations - and of course, ship's biscuit... :->

HTH !

[inf3ct3dd]

loser!ellie headcanons pt.6

summary: ellieeee my chiquitita my baby my love

warnings: none :3

authors note: ik yall missed herrrr

masterlist. help palestine.🇵🇸

- ellie tries to be soooo cool and wear her cool people jackets (leather jackets, canvas, those carhartt hoodie jackets etc) but they’re very not helpful against the cold and you’ll be out with her and shes just SHIVERING the whole time…

- she’s obsessed w those “general knowledge quizzes” on tiktok. that girl is a hoe for trivia she’s sitting on her bed at three in the morning saying her answers OUT LOUD while she watches them. she gets so upset when she gets literally any wrong… “man…im not a quiz master 🙁”

- ik in the games she walks around with her little journal and shit but i feel like shes definitely jus constantly typing shit in her notes app… random thoughts and jokes and shit that she most definitely shows you at the end of the day

- she barely ever baby talks to babies… she’ll go up to a baby and just be like “wassup dude” and have a full blown conversation with him while the babies just sitting there babbling and giggling at her

- thinks those “im nothing like yall” slideshows r so hilarious…. like you’ll be on the couch and she’s just giggling at her phone at paracetamol 😞

- references the most niche memes ever constantly and literally googles them to explain herself. you guys went camping and she said “boy you want hot dog” and you were like ????

- so strangely particular about how her stuff is arranged 😭 her desk looks like an absolute hot mess 90% of the time but SHE UNDERSTANDS IT and if u try and organize it for her she just puts it back how it was

- always says “guys” and “yall” when she’s talking to literally one person. and CHAT. she just constantly adds it into conversation like “chat how are you today”

- loves asking if things are “fire.” she’ll cook you something and you take a bite and shes like “is that shit fire???” she has to know

- obsessed with “i barely know her” jokes. the second someone says something ending in er shes like “rider??? i barely know her!!” and she’s laughing her ass off

- that girl will go HAM on some mac and cheese. but it can only be really good baked mac or the shitty kraft mac and cheese. she puts like- hella pepper and red chili flakes in it and eats it straight out of the pot 🔥 its always at like three in the morning and you just walk in the kitchen to her with a pot in her lap watching glee or some shit

- SPEAKING. OF. glee is most definitely one of her guilty pleasure shows…like shes rewatched it a million times and glee cast was one of her top artists on apple music wrapped

- shes an apple music user. send tweet.

- got yelled at by an old lady once cuz she picked her flowers out of her front yard and gave them to you

- when i tell you that girl goes ham on those tiny clementines… she’ll eat like 10 in one day and theres just PEELS. EVERYWHERE.

- also she fw grapes heavy. especially green grapes (shes a weird little freak red grapes are so much better)

- OBSESSED WITH THOSE BLIND BAG SHITS. especially mini brands oh my god she definitely has the whole lil grocery store set and she’s so obsessed with it.

- her house slippers are definitely just a pair of crocs with the fur inside and a bunch of stupid ass jibbits. she buys the mega packs off amazon and changes them whenever shes bored

- has SO MANY drafts on tiktok and they’re all her trying filters staring at the screen like 😯

- most annoying person to sleep next to ever . snoring, sleep talking, moving around CONSTANTLY and hitting you accidentally, the only way she sleeps peacefully is if you’re holding her or she’s holding you, otherwise shes insane

- weirdly into linguistics…that girl is using humongous words for no good reason just for fun and half the time she has no idea what they mean and when she googles them and shes right about the definition she does that little fist pump and “fuck yes”

- speaking of. that girl is SPEEDRUNNING DUOLINGO . she’s fluent in (bad spaniard) spanish from it, and just learns random languages for fun. you speak a different language? she’s learning it immediately. definitely leaves notes for you in random languages she learned and you have to pull out a translator to understand wtf shes talking about… she also sleep talks in spanish sometimes and its so funny

- loves trying out different recipes…like i said my girl is a CHEF she will be at home fucking up a salmon bake she made and making you homemade pho for dinner

- had a phase when she was younger when she was really into the la bamba movie and dressed like richie valens for two years

- also cried so hard when she watched selena with you…that girl was devastated 💔 every time she hears “dreaming of you” she almost sheds a tear

“when that yolanda bitch gets out of prison….im shooting someone . its obvious who its gonna be.”

- she definitely begged joel to buy her a gun for christmas and he would take her to the range all the time so she can SHOOT. that girl is goated at lazer tag she gets down…does not play

- thought that candy cigarettes were the coolest thing ever when she was little… everywhere she went she had one hanging out of the side of her mouth and shed hold them between her fingers like they do in movies. if you two go to a candy shop shes for sure buying a pack

[spooky-pop]

My brother mailed me some trolls related gifts for my upcoming birthday, and along with it was one of those themed sticker packs from Amazon and YOU KNOOOOW those packs have some weirdness in em. So I must share two ugly finds while going through the pack.

FIRST OFF: This sticker was almost cute- except for the fact that Poppy has a HUMAN ARM and this image is from the second movie, not the third?

SECOND- what is this ai generated mess??? Horrible. Terrifying.

I took the stickers out that obviously included stolen art, some from artists I know of in the fandom, but tbh the rest of the stickers are fine 😂 But these two?? Into the incinerator immediately

[otkuhotgirl]

─── 𝐀𝐌𝐀𝐙𝐎𝐍 .

# with : black-leg sanji.

at last, having been granted enough privacy, following your lover’s catastrophically failed wedding, you’re determined to remind him who he belongs to.

⎰ & smut. post whole-cake island. sub!sanji. amazon position. oral (reader receiving). dom!reader. pathetic sanji (😍). praise kink. fem!reader. no y/n used.

W.C: 4K.

sanji prided himself in a select — yet useful — number of crafts. he was a terrific chef. he had an innate talent to find the ripest fruits at the street market. he had muscular legs and quite a vast list of attacks. and the most important of them all: he turned out to be a master in pleasuring his woman. one could count the manner with which he treated women in general, yet upon learning of his love, sanji had ceased to flirt without a purpose, rather focusing on the one whose finger he meant to put on a ring one day.

by the end of those miserable two years of training — apart from those he cherished, running without a second of rest —, sanji was thrilled to, at last, reencounter his crewmates. it was enough a blessing to bear witness to nami and robin’s perfection, yet nothing had prepared him to the sight of you, a breathing deity; the epitome of all that was sacred. and when his captain proudly stated that you were given the allowance of your empress to join his crew? sanji learned of heaven.

it proved to be a complicated task — earning the trust of a kuja, as a man. particularly because, upon first meeting the strawhats, your idea of the behavior of a man was based on luffy. and luffy was far from normal.

nevertheless, sanji had refused to quit. he memorized your favorite dishes and introduced you to ones you never had; he paid attention to your stories; he seeked you out amidst the others. at first, it was mere attraction — born from the idealization of the island of women and the warriors born and raised in amazon lily. however, soon enough, sanji was left dumbfounded at the realization that he fell for you — and hard —, during those shared moments.

luckily for him, it seemed that the kuja were also prone to falling madly in love in a scarce interval of time.

being your partner was the biggest marvel of his life, and quite the accomplishment of one of the wildest dreams of a clear pervert — to teach his partner the wonders of sexual endeavors and to be aware of the fact that she’d learn it all from him. sanji adored the thought of being your first — and only —, as you were his as well. sex began with its rough patches due to mutual inexperience, and your absolute cluelessness regarding a man’s intimacy and even the act of masturbation, yet time proved itself to be a blessing; you caught on to the act pretty quickly, learning of his most sensitive spots and taking advantage of them during those intimate moments.

sanji was on top during the first instances, his experience — consisting of porn magazines and eavesdropping on past conversations at the baratie — gave him the upper ground. yet, as your confidence grew with repetition, sanji found himself struggling to maintain his dominance. it started gradually: you, riding him more than often; a hand to the nape guiding itself to his throat; his tie wrapped around one of his wrists. it was a matter of time until he surrendered himself entirely to you, unashamed to be at your feet.

and the time at hand came after the unfolding events of his failed and arranged marriage; the freedom of wano; and the brief peace thereafter. the sunny docked at the boisterous deck of a town for supplies, and before sanji had the chance to venture it with the means of restocking the kitchen, you grabbed the collar of his shirt and dragged him to the women’s quarters.

the ship was oddly quiet due to the absence of the rest of your crewmates, and he watched as you searched underneath your mattress for something in particular.

“are we… alright, my beloved?” he inquired, fidgeting.

you had long understood and forgiven him for his past acts, yet sanji was neither a fool nor blind to the ever-growing tension lodged in your shoulders; the clench and unclench of your fists when you were lost in thought. it made him nervous — terrified, even —, wondering if you meant to leave him.

rather than answering, you turned towards him with a magazine in hand, your finger marking a specific page with quite graphic illustrations.

sanji recognized it immediately, his eyes growing wide and throat drying up. it was one he bought ages ago, back in loguetown, that had at least seventy sex positions listed in it.

“i want to try this one,” you stated matter-of-factly. “it has the name of my island.”

he felt his legs tremble as he approached you, wary in his steps. sanji glared at the page in question, the amazon written in black ink above the illustrations, seeming to taunt his resolve.

at last, his eyes softened as he placed one hand above your cheek, caressing the skin with his thumb, aiming at a loving encounter. “i could never deny you a thing, amoureuse.”

sanji should have known better than to expect you to be tender. your eyes were sharp as you threw the magazine somewhere meaningless, gripping the front collar of his shirt.

“take off your tie,” you demanded, the intonation of your voice unallowing protests.

he shuddered; fingers trembling as he complied. your eyes remained glued to his movements, the famine stare of a predator facing its cornered prey. sanji let out a breath of awe, feeling a heat reach his cheeks and neck, painting the paleness of his skin a shade of pink. the erection jailed by the knitting of his clothing became painful within a second. he was too hard; grinding against nothing for an ounce of non-found solace.

you cooed at the action, tangling your fingers amidst golden threads of hair, caressing his scalp. “so eager, sanji-kun. you missed me, haven’t you?”

behind the lust and the command, he caught on the briefest glimpse of uneasiness — as though you longed to be reassured. he felt weak and ashamed, wishing to punish himself for having ever made you believe such a sour and untrue thing of your importance in his life.

sanji knelt in front of you, hugging your legs with both arms as he claimed the flesh of your thighs and bones of your knees with his lips and tongue, his eyes trailed to your face as he rested the side of a cheek against your skin.

“there’s no life for me without you in it, dearest,” sanji whispered, voice meek as you softened — for the merest of seconds — before the loving touch in his hair turned into a bruising grip.

“get up and give me your tie, will you?”

sanji’s mouth fell open to produce a shameful whimper at your touch. he felt your fingers moving down to his chin, nails digging in the skin as you forced him to meet your eyes.

“don’t make me repeat myself, lover,” you demanded, to which he gulped.

sanji’s legs had been crafted into a wonder of itself. muscular and firemade; unbreakable flesh and bones meant to shield and serve. yet, as he raised from the ground, those same legs trembled and faltered under the pressure of your glance.

the fabric of his tie — expensive, at that —, was crushed between your fingers, and sanji found himself not caring in the slightest, mouth foaming at the sight.

his teeth clashed once your thumb forced his jaw shut. he observed you with widened eyes as you soothed the region, skin scraping against his goatee.

“lay down on my bed,” you instructed, pressing your palm flat against his chest to push him further.

sanji complied, his back meeting the soft surface. he whined, observing your knees digging into the mattress as you hovered over him, not quite meeting his clothed thighs. sanji observed you with certain desperation, his fingers trembling due to the overwhelming desire as he aimed at your waist.

“now, now,” you cooed, gripping his wrists as you tied them both to the bed. “we have the entire afternoon, why the hurry?”

sanji tested the binds, well aware that he had more than enough strength to tear it with the merest of pulls. your glance hardened, not an ounce of sympathy offered towards his actions. sanji ceased immediately, accepting his fate.

“please,” he mumbled, his voice sounding odd to his own ears, lacking its usual fire.

“please what, sanji-kun?” you taunted.

“touch me!” he found himself begging, tearing his head from the pillow; buckling his hips as he searched for the contact from your figure.

you gripped the middle of his shirt, pressing a kiss to his forehead. sanji closed his eyes, whimpering as he clung to that faintest touch as though one would to the lingering taste of a most favored food. he chased your lips, nearly losing the sense of the words that graced his sore ears.

“don’t be mad at me for that,” you whispered, breath fanning above his earlobe.

sanji meant to protest. to remind you that there was not a thing you could do or say to ever grant his distaste. yet his voice failed and melted into a yelp, his eyes widening as he observed the buttons fly across the room, the fabric of his shirt tearing open and your eyes drowning in the sight of his bare skin.

sanji’s head fell against the pillow as your hands traveled down his chest, pinching the skin; massaging his abdomen. he tried — he really did — to maintain his composure. sanji was still when your fingers unraveled him, and remained still when your lips, teeth and tongue greeted his flesh, leaving a trail of bites and kisses and bruises in its wake. he was in a pathetic state of broken moans and pleads, yes, but he was obedient. that was, of course, until your mouth closed around a nipple.

sanji’s hips buckled. he moved with pure desperation, chasing friction, whimpering, fighting against the tie. your own hips lowered, forcing his back against the mattress. you applied force, ceasing his movements all at once, and observing him with a glint of disapproval.

“stop that,” you grounded him, gripping his wrists.

“‘m sorry,” sanji caught himself saying, a pool of tears threatening to spill at the pressure of your figure above his aching cock. “‘m sorry. ‘m sorry.”

“you won’t move unless i tell you to,” he nodded fervently. “repeat it.”

“i won’t move unless you tell me to.”

“and i’m your one and only.”

“and you’re my one and only,” he started, refusing to stop at that. “i’m your devoted servant. your loyal dog. i’m nothing if not born to be yours.”

“that’s good, beloved,” you said, and sanji could have melted if not for your next words. “because you’re not being a good boy right now.”

sanji felt himself flush with shame, devastated at the prospect of having disappointed you in some sense.

“i’ll do better,” he whimpered with clear desperation, eager to serve.

“of course you will,” you answered, pleased with his reaction. “you won’t get to cum otherwise.”

ruthless, he thought to himself. his dick twitched. sanji never loved you more.

your lips returned to its previous ministrations, claiming each and every inch of his skin; torturing the most delicate spots of his neck. when you bit down on his pressure point, sanji moaned. his mouth clamped shut thereafter, nervous-struck tears rolling down his flushed cheeks.

he cleared his throat, forcing himself to meet your piercing gaze. “c-can i—”, his voice toned down, embarrassment overcoming him.

“use your words, sanji,” you reminded him, lightly pinching one of his nipples.

he shuddered, swallowing down a whine. “can i make… noises?”

sanji was unsure; meek, even. you pressed a single kiss to his chest, humming. “you must.”

his throat went dry, and he mumbled incoherences, clinging to the tie. a harsh bite to his flesh stole a moan from him — a reminder that he was to speak.

“alright,” sanji whispered, losing a sense of sanity as he observed you unzip your shorts and toss the fabric somewhere amidst the lost buttons.

sanji whined at the sudden lack of contact once you aimed to position your core above his awaiting lips.

“would you mind?” you teased, refusing to remove your panties, while well aware that he had no means to do it himself.

“please,” he pleaded, feeling pathetic at his own despair. yet your eyes held neither pity nor disgust, but burning lust and passion; the intrinsic pride of having him into such a position.

sanji had prayed to be loved; to be desired. he wasted ages pursuing such a thing, at last to comprehend that one did not capture love, but was rather captivated and lured into it during the least expected instance. love was the sight he was faced with as in that moment; love was what he meant to pour in his tongue once it met the drenched patch of your panties, seeking your warmth.

slowly and with certain sadism, for he wasn’t allowed to move a mere inch, you lowered yourself, at last offering him the solace he chased. sanji latched his mouth on your clothed clit, circling his tongue around the sensible bud. he whined at the sounds of your pleasure, sending vibrations through your core.

the first moment in which he begged you to sit on his face had been surrounded in reassuring words from his side. you once hovered, hesitant to have him uncomfortable or trapped in between your thighs. sanji, then, had a vice grip on your flesh, pleading you to use him for your pleasure. and once you complied, it became clear that you had taken a particular liking to that position — and sanji would never complain whatsoever.

he buried his nose in your cunt, coating your panties with his saliva, attempting to have his tongue inside your pussy regardless of the fabric in between. you gripped his hair, bruising the scalp, forcing yourself further down his mouth. sanji drowned in it, controlling the urge to rut his hips, eyes trailed to your reactions.

sanji adored the sight of your face once it was contorted in pleasure; thrived in the fact that he was the one responsible for it. he fastened his pace, teasing your clit with his nose while biting the vexing panties that stole him the delight of tasting you fully. you were nearing an edge, melting at the teasing of your folds — he could sense it. before sanji could demolish your resolve whatsoever, you raised your hips, tearing your cunt from the ministrations of his lips. he whined, observing you; a pout threatening to form in his lips.

“don’t complain,” you reprimanded, returning to your previous position above his thighs. “i’m not cumming on your tongue.”

sanji’s erection was painful, constrained by the fabric of his clothes. his eyes filled with tears yet again, and your gaze softened ever-so-slightly.

“my love—”

“shhh,” you reassured, working to unbutton his pants. “i got you.”

sanji’s grip tightened around his tie as you stripped the lower half of his body bare. your panties were thrown above the pile of his trousers and underwear, and you touched his calves softly. with sudden tenderness, you raised both his legs, pushing them beyond his shoulders, eyes wide.

“you are flexible, aren’t you?” you mused, the compliment causing him to nod with fervor and melt.

“for you, mon cheri, i can be anything,” he breathed out, lost with the sight of your intimacy.

your palms remained on his calves, forcing his feet to meet the headboard. “don’t move.”

“i wouldn’t dream of it, my heart,” sanji proffered, missing the warmth of your palms as you guided one of them to his cock.

you tightened your fingers around the hard shaft, teasing the reddish head. sanji whined, struggling to contain his squirming. yet, he remained still — as you had instructed him to.

“what a good boy,” you complimented, aligning his dick to your entrance. sanji offered you a meek smile, moaning as you teased your folds with his erection.

your walls enveloped his cock as you sank into him. sanji closed his eyes, his cheek against the pillow. you pressed your chest against his own, wickedly satisfied with his reaction. sanji trailed his glance to your covered chest, trembling with desire, his fingers twitching due to the urge to touch your figure.

the fabric of his tie scratched against his wrists as sanji squirmed, struggling to keep his hips tethered to the mattress, as you were unmoving. if he was to switch the angle of his legs ever so slightly, he would feel his feet brush against the side of his head. yet your palms held his calves with an ironmade grip, nails digging in the surface.

“what do you want, love?” you inquired, and he poured his adoration into his glance at the sound of your voice.

“to touch you, ma perle,” he answered with near desperation, struggling to maintain his voice stable.

you tilted your head to the side, grinding your hips. your walls clenched around his shaft and sanji whined, tearstruck eyes born from lust.

“you are touching me,” you said, raising your hips for a mere instance before sinking all the way down. the sound of your moan pushed him through the bottom of a cliff.

“please, please,” he pleaded. “i’ll make you feel so good, mon amour. let me touch you properly, i promise—”

“oh, but you’re making me feel good already,” you mumbled, moving your hips to tease his cock — sheltered inside your warmth. “let me have you this way for now, hm? could you do that for me, sanji?”

“yes,” he broke down, his resolve melting in a puddle.

you hummed, pleased at his willingness. after what seemed to be a thousand ages, your feet sunk into the mattress as you sat above him, holding his raised legs into place. the bed creaked and complained with your bouncing, the tip of his cock reaching newer and deeper spots due to the angle; spots that had you mewling above him, a fruit of ecstasy that sanji so eagerly devoured.

a choir of whimpers tore through his throat as you rode him, raising your weight until his tip brushed against your entrance, to at last slam yourself back down, allowing him to brush against your sweetest spot. you held his wrists for further equilibrium, mouth agape and drool dripping down your chin to his chest as the base of his cock disappeared amidst your folds.

sanji’s glance was tethered to your face — contorted with pleasure —, while he fought against the urge to roll his eyes. the sensitive flesh of his cock was painted white with your essence; the alluring sound of your flesh meeting his own, his balls caged under your ass for the briefest instances. he teared up at the stimulation, his voice assuming a louder — yet shriller — intonation.

sanji felt the warmth of your essences on his skin as it dripped from your intertwined bodies to the silken sheets. he struggled with the tie, repeatedly hitting the back of his head against the pillow. sanji was muttering incoherences — from meaningless pleading to the broken syllables of your name —, a desperate fool of aching feet that could not cease to dance at the tempo of your music.

sanji was barely able to make out your figure through the blurriness from his tears. your hips halted to a slower pace, taunting circles that had him gasping and squirming for a deeper contact.

“what do you want, dearest?”

sanji glazed at your hardened nipples, hidden behind a slim fabric. a harsh grip to his chin — one that guided his eyes to your face — brought him back to the matter at hand.

he cleared his throat, struggling to find the words, lost in the feeling of your walls clenching around his cock.

“want to help you,” he mumbled, aware of your trembling legs, threatening to crumble. “want you to use me.”

you hummed, sinking your knees on the mattress. his tip brushed against your cervix, the position granting him deeper access. sanji cried out, arching his back, his legs diligently obeying to your commands as your palms spread them open. the room filled with the sounds of skin-on-skin, and your pace wavered due to the previous effort; your hips rolling, rather than rising.

your palms met his bare chest, and you yelped when sanji — out of sheer instinct — buckled his hips upwards, matching the tempo of your bouncing. sanji prepared a choir of apologies for the haste; for disrespecting your commands. yet, he was graced with the sound of your mewls, arching your back and digging your nails as you conceded to his actions. your breasts followed the pace you settled, and sanji’s mouth all but watered at the sight, his tongue rolling past his lips due to the desire to have your nipples covered in saliva.

you spared him a glance, eyes losing focus as your thighs burned and your release fled from your grip.

“sanji,” you drawled out, placing one hand on his cheek. the man followed your touch with his lips, pressing wet kisses and sucking onto the skin, observing you through his lashes; eyes glassy.

“y-yes, mon amour?”

you gulped, falling prey to his flushed cheeks and fucked up expression. so much for following-in with the dominance.

“touch me,” you allowed him, emitting a groan of frustration with one last descent.

your cunt swallowed him whole, his balls brushing against the flesh of your ass. your moan got lost between the sound of his ripped tie. sanji lowered his legs and sat up with such haste that his forehead met yours with a particularly unnecessary strength.

“ouch,” you mumbled, giggling as sanji cradled your cheeks with worry.

“‘m sorry, my treasure,” he breathed out, pressing kisses to the extension of your face, not leaving a single inch unattended. “allow me to take care of you.”

you brushed the sweaty hair off his face, wishing to have both of his eyes focused on your figure. you rolled your hips, fueled by his reaction. sanji cranned up his neck, and dug his digits on the flesh your ass as he set the pace, moving his hips to meet your own as you rode him.

the cook latched his lips to your collarbone, unable to reach your breasts due to the angle, yet refusing to have your skin without a trail of hickeys. you hugged him, pressing his face closer. your back arched, eyes rolling with pleasure as your tired throat failed to produce a single moan.

sanji sobbed at the clenching of your cunt around his sensitive cock. gripping his hair, you adjusted the angle of your head to allow him to lick the sweat off the side of your neck. somewhere in that haze there was the sound of frail wood — not that neither of you cared.

“i’m c-close,” you moaned, hips giving in as sanji did his best to rut into you, claiming your insides as his tip continued to meet your sensitive spot.

“c-can i cum too?” he inquired through trembling lips, his voice close to giving in. “please, my star, let me cum with you. i’ve been—ngh, good, right?”

you felt his tears dripping on your skin, mixed with his saliva and your own sweat. your fingers caressed the blonde locks of hair as you nodded, attempting to reassure him through the broken moans as your hips rolled against his.

“cum for me, love,” you encouraged, feeling the familiar twitch of his cock within you.

sanji whimpered, burying his face on your shoulder as he bottomed out, spurts of his seed filling your insides and dripping on the sheets. you rode him, ignoring his pleas and sobs, chasing your own high.

“so good for me,” you cooed, pressing your lips to the crown of his head. “you’re always so good.”

a last bounce undid the invisible knot that held your own release. as it seemed, it also demolished the structure of the bed, and you heard the cracking wood before you, sanji and the mattress were thrown on the ground. your essence mixed with his, and sanji’s cock remained deep inside as he hugged your figure to shelter you from the impact.

“oh shit—”, he worried, anxiously observing the surroundings as you guided him to the soaked sheets.

both of you whimpered, sensible, when you removed his softened cock from your cunt. sanji’s fingers settled on your back, drawing hearts on your skin as you laid above him.

“it’s fine,” you soothed, pressing the side of your head to his chest to hear the wild beating of his heart. “want to stay like this for a little longer.”

the cook peppered kisses on the crown of your head, allowing the silence to engulf the room. musing how he had managed to live for such a long period without your guiding light.

“missed you,” you confessed, kissing the spot above his heart.

he stifled for a second, before his arms hugged you tighter, as if fearing that you were but a dream that he was soon to be woken up from.

“i’m so sorry for leaving so suddenly—”

“sanji.”

“hm?”

“you’re back and you’re mine. and i love you. that’s all that matters to me.”

his throat dried up as he swallowed. “i love you more.”

“enough to take the blame for the bed when nami returns?”

he shuddered, observing your face as your chin pressed against his chest. “anything for you.”

— 🐈‍⬛ : hiiiii (mouth foaming) it’s been a while (i need to impregnate that man) hope everyone’s having a great week (clenching my fist) let’s all do our best!! (if i don’t have sanji by saturday i’m going to crawl up the walls and eat a tree).

[gennyrthewriter]

I'm celebrating the DEFINITIVE (second) edition of my first book being released on Amazon! If you like colonial-era inspired low fantasy with political intrigue, moral ambiguity, ideological struggle, and of course, two gay men coated in blood fighting each other with swords at the climax, give it a chance!

Click here for a link to the Amazon page

In a forgotten backwater colony, a power hungry general, an exiled city guard, a lost queen, and a rogue agent clash over the scraps that each feel they were entitled to. When those hungry for power fight, can anyone truly win?