#screaming more screaming sobbing bawling throwing up
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This will haunt me for a long, long time. His face as his world falls apart and the way he has to keep it together because they are in danger
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cntloup · 9 months ago
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18+ MDNI Price hiring Ghost to teach his bratty daughter, you a lesson
Part 2
He trusts him with his life. He knows he's a good man and would never really hurt you.
And he's a man. Not one of those boys that you sneak out with. He's a seasoned soldier. He's seen some shit. He's been through hell and back. He won't stand your bratty behavior one bit.
So basically Ghost is there to babysit a grown woman. And Price has given him the green light to do anything he saw fit with you.
Your mouth hangs open and your eyes widen the moment you set eyes on him. DAMN he's huge. And the mask is terrifying. And frankly a bit (a lot) arousing.
He threatens to get you on his lap the moment you act up and start whining which makes you act up even more.
"I need to go shopping. Where's my dad's credit card? I know I had it." "No you don't. And it's over, princess. No more access to his bank account."
You gasp dramatically and within seconds you're sobbing and squealing out incoherent words.
"Shh, princess. C'mere." he coos as he brings you to sit on his lap. He places your head on his chest, brushing his fingers through your hair as you bawl your eyes out until you pass out.
But him being soft with you does not last long as you get more comfortable around him and throw tantrums more often. And he's had it with the goddamn banshee screams.
That's when you end up on his lap almost every night. One hand holding your hip so you can't squirm away and one big strong palm hitting against your ass so hard, the sound reverberates through the room mixing with your cries and screams.
If you ever start whining about a boy, he just shushes you with a warning and goes on with his day, but if you ever try to sneak out, that's when you end up on all fours as he slaps your pussy repeatedly until you're a whining mess, both because of the pain, also the heat and slick between your legs.
And if you've been extra bratty that day, that's when he gets his cock out, slowly sliding through your folds, teasing you. Then he suddenly slams his fat cock into your soaking wet pussy as you let out sobs of pain and pleasure, muffled by the pillows.
And he starts moving without letting you adjust, hips slamming against your ass with full force, your needy little pussy stretched out so wide, the aching pleasure of his thick veiny cock dragging along your sensitive walls, so sweet and delicious.
And he cums inside. His thick warm cum filling up your womb. Not afraid to get you pregnant. Maybe you'll be less bratty then.
comments/reblogs are greatly appreciated ♥ 
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muniimyg · 2 months ago
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𐙚₊˚⊹ bbydaddy!jk (18) ⋆𐙚₊˚⊹ *nsfw*
series m.list // taglist request: closed
note: some angst ?? but it's heartwarming... smut ofc because we are so back ! jk and oc finally kiss again (and can't stop) and so he fingers her. they sort of... talk things out??? def on the right path to their happily ever after <3
//
one thing jungkook and zion have in common (aside from being each other's splitting image) is that they’re both grumpy when sick.
last night, when zion slept over at jungkook’s, he was whiny and snappy. he cried a few times, sobbing for you (he's also been going through separation anxiety with you regardless. being sick just makes it feel extra awful). it worried jungkook since whenever zion was sick, you were always around. you were always the one to take care of him, and even if jungkook wanted to help, zion would throw a fit and refuse to let him near.
he can’t blame his son, though.
jungkook is the same.
when he’s sick, he only wants you. only you could nurse the sickness away. only you could make him feel better.
as the sun came up, zion woke up in a tired, slow mood. he wasn’t snappy or grumpy per se, but he was definitely out of it. jungkook checked his temperature (it was normal) and even added oranges to his snack box for the extra vitamin c. it’s a little chilly today; the sky looks like it has plans to cry soon, so he dresses zion in an extra layer. then, he lets you know what’s going on, drops zion off at daycare, and tells zion’s educators that he’s feeling a little under the weather.
jungkook repeats over and over again: "please call me if he’s really not feeling up for it today. he doesn’t have to be sick sick, okay? just call me if he even tells you guys he’s tired. i have a meeting, but i’ll come right when it’s over… that’ll be around 11 a.m."
at 11:28 a.m., zion’s daycare calls jungkook to say that zion spent the entire morning sleeping and then woke up to throw up.
at 11:31 a.m., he texts you.
by 11:45 a.m., he rushes into the daycare, grabbing zion’s backpack and holding him with his other arm.
… and holy shit, is it awful.
zion is kicking and screaming, bawling his eyes out because he doesn’t want jungkook. he’s uncomfortable and running really hot. jungkook is trying to sign zion out as his educators quickly update him on the details of zion’s morning.
jungkook can’t hear a thing.
he just keeps thinking to himself: fuck, i wish ___ were here.
hustling to leave, jungkook’s feet come to a halt at the door.
it’s pouring rain.
he hisses, feeling like he will lose his mind in the next five seconds. everything is so overstimulating and heavy. zion’s sobs grow louder with each passing moment he’s in jungkook’s arms. zion’s backpack isn’t even zipped up properly, so some of his things are falling out—and holy fuck, why is it raining so fucking much?
then, it gets worse.
jungkook’s car is parked four blocks away. he suddenly remembers this as he scans the area and feels even more helpless.
he takes a deep breath and accepts his fate. he accepts that zion will be crying in the car the whole ride long. he accepts that the backpack he’s carrying will be empty by the second block. he accepts that he and zion will be drenched in rain and probably get sick soon, too.
he accepts his fate.
“zion, daddy parked the car far away. i’m really sorry, buddy. can you take some deep breaths for me before we go? we’re going to get wet, and it’s hard for daddy to focus if you’re crying like this—”
zion hits jungkook’s shoulders and sobs even harder. “no! i don’t want to get wet! i don’t want you! i only want mommy—”
“she’s coming, zion. mommy will be at the house—”
“no!” zion cries, shaking his head profusely. “i want mommy now!”
jungkook can’t help but tear up. zion is burning up. his small hands clutch onto jungkook’s shirt, and his face is flushed with fever. he shifts slightly in jungkook’s arms, letting out a tired whimper. jungkook’s heart twists.
he stares at the rain pouring down, watching it hit the pavement in heavy sheets.
just 4 blocks.
he’d done it a hundred times before—walked this exact route, held zion in his arms when things got tough. but for the first time in his whole fatherhood, he doesn’t know how to be one. not that he’s a pro and has known what to do for the past three years—but he was usually better than this. he knows how to calm zion down. he knows how to hold his son and walk four blocks. he knows tough days… but for some reason, right now feels impossible.
it feels like he’s stuck.
it feels like shit.
he takes a deep breath, his mind racing as he prepares to step into the rain.
“we’ll be okay,” he murmurs, more to himself than to zion, who is now resting his head on jungkook’s shoulder. every muscle in jungkook’s body is tense, ready to sprint through the storm if that’s what it takes. “daddy’s fast. okay, zi? but i’m going to need your help for extra speed. can you take a deep breath and count with me? let’s go in three, two, one—”
just as jungkook is about to step into the rain, there you are.
“zion!” your voice calls out.
you appear out of nowhere, stepping into view with an umbrella in hand. your eyes lock with jungkook’s; they’re filled with concern but somehow steady, reassuring. it’s like you know exactly when to show up, like you always do.
no call, no texts—just… there.
thank god.
jungkook exhales, feeling the weight of everything lift just a little. maybe timing isn’t something you can plan or force, but somehow, it always feels right when it comes to you. truth be told, you have this way of arriving just when everything feels like it’s slipping out of control—like the universe is telling jungkook he’s destined to wait for you.
to live life with you.
to be with you.
to love you.
zion gasps, quickly wiping his own tears.
“mommy!” he exclaims, his voice thin but full of excitement. “mommy! come here, please! i want you! okay? daddy—it’s mommy! see? over there? yellow umbrella…”
jungkook follows zion’s gaze and watches as you cross the street.
“yeah,” jungkook sighs softly, brushing a hand through zion’s damp hair. “look at that… mommy came for you, zi.”
zion smiles tiredly, his face softening despite the fever’s flush. “cos she loves me.”
“she does,” jungkook chuckles, pressing a light kiss to zion’s forehead. “i love zion too.”
zion huffs, crossing his arms weakly before whining in that small way only toddlers could. “no. i only want mommy’s love—oh, oh, oh! my mommy—” he wriggles in jungkook’s arms, reaching out towards you.
jungkook feels the shift in zion’s body, the way his little arms reach out desperately for you. it’s as if you are the only thing that could make the world feel right again.
finally, beside them, you step forward, and jungkook loosens his hold. gently, he transfers zion into your waiting arms. zion nestles against you instantly, his tired body finding comfort in the way you hold him—the way only you could.
jungkook stands there for a moment, watching you two. a small pang of something—loss, maybe—passes through him. but it isn’t about that. it isn’t about pride or who could soothe zion better.
it’s about the way zion relaxes, finally at peace in your arms, and how the pouring rain is nothing compared to the sunshine you radiate.
then, jungkook sighs. his heart is heavy and warm at the same time. with his parents taking zion over the weekend, jungkook only really had him for one cranky night and this hectic morning.
now, it’s noon, and it’s crystal clear that he isn’t enough for zion.
today, he failed.
… and that’s okay.
as much as parenting is about getting things right, it’s also about getting things wrong. this? this is what parenting is too—knowing when to step back, to let someone else be the safe place. as much as it stings, it is also filled with relief.
zion is safe.
zion is loved.
… and in the end, that’s all that matters.
as zion settles into your arms, jungkook takes the umbrella from you. he steps into the rain, holding the umbrella for you two. patting zion’s back, you whisper reassuring things into his ears. he giggles and begins to babble about how much he missed you. he requests noodles and to sleep on the couch tonight. you tell him no, that his bed is better. he doesn’t fight you. instead, he asks if he can get a lollipop for his sore throat. you grant that request.
“nam joon just sent me here by uber… but i think it left already. where’s your car?” you ask jungkook.
“it’s 4 blocks away. should I go get it—”
“it’s fine,” you decide. “let’s walk there together. are you okay? you look kind of—”
“mr. and mrs. jeon?”
you both turn your heads to see zion’s teacher come out. she has two small containers in her hand and zion’s water bottle. she jogs over despite the rain.
“oh! thank goodness i caught you two. these are zion’s—” she hands the items to jungkook. he opens zion’s bag and puts the things inside. “... and i just wanted to remind you we have show and tell next week. i meant to mention it earlier when mr. jeon was signing zion out but forgot. anyways, get home safe and get well soon, zion!”
“thank you,” jungkook nods. “thanks for calling too.”
zion’s teacher smiles warmly. “no worries! zion is so precious to us. even when he has his days… i don’t think i’m supposed to say this, but—he’s our favorite. he’s always curious and funny. he’s kind and organized for a 3-year-old… probably gets that from you two, huh? he always talks about you two. he loves you guys so much and always draws family pictures of you at home.”
your heart melts.
“... and honestly? i’ve never seen you two pick zion up together, and my colleagues and i all talk about how much you two suit each other… seeing it in person—together? wow. you look like you were destined to be a family.”
jungkook’s heart melts.
you two laugh and thank her for her kind words. they don’t make you feel awkward… if anything, they make you smile. to be known and loved—to have people believe in you two… it’s different. it’s something else.
it’s something real.
as zion’s teacher bids her goodbye, you and jungkook share a look.
“let’s go?”
jungkook nods, follows your lead, and trails a few steps behind you.
he holds the umbrella high above you and zion, making sure the rain doesn’t touch either of you. you glance back, catching a glimpse of his shoulders already soaked after just a few steps in, his hair dripping with rain while yours and zion’s remain dry.
suddenly, you feel a rush of warmth and frustration all at once.
he does this every time—always putting himself last, always making sure you and zion are okay first. it’s one of the ways he loves; you know that. quietly, without asking for anything in return. but right now, as you feel the warmth of zion’s little body against yours, dry and protected under the umbrella, something twists inside you.
fuck.
you hate it so much.
“jungkook…” you start, your voice soft, but he shakes his head before you can say more, a small smile playing on his lips.
“i’m fine,” he says, like he always does, eyes darting briefly to zion nestled in your arms, then back to you. there’s something so gentle in that look, and it’s enough to silence you. because you know—he’s doing this because he wants to, because this is how he loves. he won’t let you carry the weight alone, not even for a second.
still, it frustrates you.
watching him like this, so selfless and soaked, makes you want to pull him under the umbrella, to wrap him up and shield him the way he does for you. but you know he wouldn’t let you. you sigh, biting back the urge to protest. instead, you adjust zion in your arms and glance back at him, hoping he knows.
and he does.
because when your eyes meet his, there’s a moment—unspoken, quiet—where you don’t have to say a word. in the way you look at him. he can feel it: the gratitude, the love, the quiet ache of wanting him to take care of himself, too... and maybe he feels it too because the smile he gives you is softer this time. a little more knowing.
you wish you could pull him closer, but in your own way, you love him back. you hold zion a little tighter, taking care of what he holds dear to his heart, just as he takes care of both of you.
as the rain pours harder, he stays a step behind, soaked but steady, and you walk together in the silence, knowing without words that love isn’t always about who gets wet and who stays dry.
sometimes, it’s about who’s willing to stand in the rain for you.
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the car ride was quiet. 
you sat in the back, holding zion’s hand the entire time. zion fell asleep but would shift and murmur, “mommy, mommy…” 
jungkook drove carefully and often glanced back at you two. he isn’t sure why, but he kind of really loves this moment. it reminds him of the day you two were bringing zion home from the hospital. 
he loves the way you are with his son. 
he loves you so much. 
when you get home, zion is attached to you by the hip. he throws a tantrum when jungkook pulls him away from you so he and zion could go take a bath together while you get started on chicken noodle soup for lunch. jungkook struggles and feels bad for ripping zion away from you, but doesn’t take it to heart. 
zion is just like this when he’s sick. 
once their bath is finished, zion comes running to you from the washroom. jungkook follows along, drying his hair with a towel. you pick up zion and set him on his chair, prepared to feed him. 
from the corner of your eye, you see jungkook put his jacket on and search his pockets for his keys. 
“are you leaving?” you ask, feeding zion a spoonful. “i made you lunch too. please stay—”
“i’m gonna go buy some medicine for him,” jungkook says. “and those lollipops for sore throat? does he even have a sore throat?”
you laugh. “don’t think so. we got into a bad habit of giving him them every time he’s sick though… might as well go along with it. at least they make him feel better.”
jungkook chuckles, “whatever you want, honey—”
he clears his throat. 
“sorry.”
you shrug. “don’t be.”
he offers you half a smile and ruffles zion’s hair before heading to the door. as he puts on his shoes and opens the door, you call for him once more. 
“drive safe, okay?” 
“i will.”
“go to the pharmacy on 11th. it’s the closest and they sell the apple flavour cough syrup he likes.”
“i will.”
“the lollipops are usually hidden behind their stash of kids tylenol. so look behind the tylenol.”
“i will.”
“honey?”
“mhmm?”
“go and come back quickly.”
jungkook doesn’t turn back. instead, he smiles to himself and lets his heart flutter. biting his inner cheek, he attempts to act cool. 
“i will.”
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the day goes by fast. 
jungkook came back with everything zion could possibly need. after giving zion his medicine, jungkook scrafed down the lunch you made him. it didn’t take long for zion to fall asleep. in fact, he fell asleep right away. 
as you place zion on his bed, you kiss his forehead and take his temperature again. his fever is still high but it should get better in a few hours. you’ll check on him again in a bit. shutting the door to his door, you take a deep breath and head to the living room where jungkook is on his laptop, finishing up a few things for work. 
“how’s his fever?” jungkook asks. 
“still high,” you reply, taking a seat next to him on the couch. peaking over, you notice the pharmacy bag jungkook left on the coffee table. you lean forward and take it. bringing it to the kitchen with intentions to throw it away, you notice another box left inside.
reaching your hand in, you take it out thinking it’s just another type of medicine jungkook got for zion. to your surprise, it’s a box of condoms. 
condoms. 
you and jungkook don’t fuck with condoms. 
quickly, the feeling of betrayal kicks in. how could he do this? what does this even mean? was he sleeping with someone else? or worse… does he not want more babies with you? that’s fucked up. it’s so fucking fucked up. seriously, what the actul fuck—
“sorry, i was submitting something. what did you say?” jungkook calls out. 
you snap out of your thoughts and put the box back inside the plastic bag. you set it on the kitchen island and go back to join him on the couch. sitting yourself down, you inch closer to him. 
“his fever is still high… but i’ll check again after an hour or two. the medicine probably just needs to settle in… i hate sick season. not only is everyone around us sick, but zion can be—”
“mean?”
“i was gonna say needy…”
jungkook laughs sarcastically and shuts his laptop. placing it to the side, he sighs. 
“he hated me today.”
“that can’t be true—”
“oh,” jungkook snickers. “he hated me. he only wanted you. i felt so helpless when i went to pick him up. i’m glad you came… i’m guessing they contacted you too?”
you nod. “yeah. i was about to start this new case when i got the call. told nam joon i had to leave and have someone else take my client—”
wide-eyed, jungkook shifts. “you lost a client today because i—”
“no,” you say sternly. “that’s not what i meant.”
jungkook pauses. 
then, it hits him. 
it’s been like this for a while, hasn’t it? constantly miscommunicating and assuming things between you two rather than spending the time and effort to figure things out. 
“... is it okay if i stay the night? i know we’re broken up or whatever but i’d really like to stay and help out as much as i can. i know he doesn’t want me around and you probably have this shit handled—”
“stay,” you tell him, reaching for his hand. you hold it tight and run your thumb across his knuckles. you press on the little letter ‘z’ on his hand. “... and i hate this. i need you to know that i hate this.”
“what do you—”
you don’t know what comes over you, but something does. it just does and you can’t help it. maybe it’s the box of condoms. maybe it’s the fact that this is the first time you’re alone with him in 2 weeks…
maybe it’s just time. 
“i don’t want to be broken up,” you confess, eyes glossy. “i fucked up. you fucked up. this? this is so fucking fucked up… i miss you, jungkook. i know i’m confusing and i’m a pile of broken parts—but all i know is that even though we’re not together; i don’t want to be broken up. i can’t—i don’t want it. i can’t live without you, jungkook. this is so hard. i don’t want it to be this fucking hard—”
“okay, okay—”
“and i hate that you walk in the rain for us,” you choke on your own words. “next time i’m not bringing an umbrella. we’re a family, honey. either we all walk under the umbrella or we walk in the rain together.”
“okay—”
“and why do you have a box of condoms?” you blurt out. “do you not want to have babies with me anymore? or are you sleeping with—”
“don’t even fucking finish that sentence.”
jungkook glares at you, eyes piercing and heart racing. 
you gulp.
“why do you have a box of condoms?” 
he shrugs. “yoongi called and asked me to pick him up a box. he’s going through his slut era.” 
your shoulders slump.
“i’m sorry i—i shouldn’t have looked and i shouldn’t have assumed—”
jungkook shakes his head. “no, no… it’s okay. this is good. i want you to talk about stuff like this with me. to say anything to me, really. i wait for your texts and calls all day… you have no idea how much i cried after we took zion to the kids cafe. how—for a moment—it felt like we were us again. god, ___… i want us again—mmhpfftt—”
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on your bed, you and jungkook make out. 
he’s on top (sort of. you two are laying together) and he uses one hand to cup your jaw. his lips feel soft and slippery as you reach and deepen the kiss. 
jungkook slips his tongue in every now and then, exploring your mouth as if it’s his first time kissing you… and by how he does this; it truly does feel like that. he kisses you so good, it’s hard to pull away. you don’t need air. you need him and his fucking kisses. 
“missed you,” he murmurs against your lips. 
you smile and pucker up. 
he kisses you again. 
“love you.”
you giggle as he digs himself into the crook fo your neck. 
“yah, i’m gonna be bad if you don’t say you love me back.”
“bad?”
“bad.”
you laugh and shift.
he pops his head back out and gives you a playful glare. staying silent, he takes that as a sign. before you know it, you feel him tugging your pajama shorts and underwear down. you gasp as he brings his fingers to his mouth, sucks on them, and then slips them between your fold without uttering a warning. 
“w-wait—”
jungkook crashes his lips onto yours. he kisses you tender and soft, distracting you from the fact that he just shoved a finger inside you. 
you moan as you feel him curl inside. he pumps his fingers in and out, then uses his thumb to circle your clit. you pull away from him, and he smirks as he watches your facial expressions change. 
your eyebrows furrow, then they don’t. 
your mouth parts and tiny moans escape your puffy lips. 
the corner of your lips twitches every time jungkook hits the right spot. 
it’s all just so beautiful. he loves seeing how pretty you are when you take him. he can’t help but lean in and kiss you every so often. 
jungkook continues to finger you. your pussy is so wet, it’s a breeze finger fucking it. jungkook also can’t fucking look away. god, he loves watching you. he loves how you shut your eyes and murmur his name. he loves that you pout every time you want him to kiss you… which he does. he gives it to you. all the kisses in the world—he gives you his. 
 “what’s the matter?” jungkook teases you. “why you making that face?”
you gasp as jungkook fastens his speed. he rubs you like there’s no tomorrow. 
“h-holy sh-shit!” you cry, reaching to hold onto his wrist. "uh, uh, mhmm! f-fuck..."
he lets you. 
jungkook cups your jaw with his other hand and looks into your pretty eyes. your eyes sparkle with desperation—a plead if you will. 
make me cum. 
“cute,” jungkook hisses. “so fucking cute.” 
you mimic his hiss as he continues to finger you. your stomach twitches and your hips jolt. he lets out a light laugh when your body reacts like this. 
“d-don’t laugh. takes y-you like 5 seconds t-to cum when i suck your d-dick—”
as your lips meet again—this time—time stops. 
the world around you two fades into a soft blur.
the warmth radiating from jungkook ignites something deep within you. it’s a gentle exploration at first, a soft brush of lips that sends a thrill coursing through your veins. You can feel his breath against your skin, warm and inviting, urging you closer.
the kiss deepens, transforming from hesitant sweetness to a fervent dance of longing. he adds another finger, earning a moan from you. he snickers against your lips. regardless, there’s a softness to the way he holds you. there’s a tenderness that belies the heat building between you two. every gentle press of his mouth is like an unspoken promise, a connection that draws you in, making you forget the rest of the world.
making you forget about time. 
you responds eagerly, leaning into him, feeling the pulse of their shared rhythm. his lips are a perfect fit against yours. it’s intoxicating. the way he kisses you is a mix of passion and reverence, as if every moment spent in this embrace is sacred. 
the taste of him lingers—sweet and a little bit electric, leaving you craving more.
soon, his hand on your jaw slides down to the hem of your frilly top. you comply to his hints and slide your spaghetti straps off. he then tugs your top down to your stomach, revealing your breasts. eagerly, he brings palms them. then, he brings his hand back to your jaw, tilting your head to deepen the kiss further. you can feel his heartbeat matching yours, a silent conversation between their souls. 
in this moment, there’s no past, no future—only the here and now. 
“f-fuck—” you pull away, feeling the rushing burn and intensity of your climax. "honey—"
“what’s wrong, honey?” jungkook messes with you. “what’s the matter?”
“i’m gonna—nghhh!”
jungkook finishes you off. he fingers you fast and hard. you lose your breath, trying to soak in this orgasm. as you reach your high, you feel it. as much as you want to tell him to slow down and stop; you can’t. you can’t because you know what’s coming—
you squirt. 
“oh my god, oh my god, oh m-my—”
“fuck. yeah? that’s it, mama.” jungkook mumbles, taking his fingers out and gently rubbing in between your folds. your pussy tightens and you honestly see stars all around the room. 
jungkook catches this look and chuckles. he leans in, kissing you once more. you chase after his lips when he pulls away. catching your breath, your foreheads touch. both slightly dazed, you pucker your lips and kiss his cheeks and neck. then, you catch his gaze, a mix of mischief and sincerity in his eyes, and know they’ve crossed a threshold. 
it’s more than just a kiss; it’s a promise of what’s to come, something profound that lingers in the space between them.
“love you.”
“love you too.”
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jungkook wakes up as he feels zion climbing into bed with you. sleepily, he places the back of his hand on zion’s forehead, but zion shifts away, groggy and fussy, swatting jungkook’s hand aside before snuggling closer to you.
you shift and reach over to feel zion’s forehead; he lets you.
“still has a fever,” you say, your voice dry and half-asleep. with your eyes still closed, you decide, “no daycare today.”
jungkook hums in agreement, feeling the warmth radiating from his son. he then moves closer to you two, putting his arm around zion. but zion huffs, grumbling in annoyance, and moves jungkook’s arm away, throwing his own over your body instead. you wrap your arms around zion, feeling his small frame relax against you.
jungkook sleepily opens his eyes and can’t help but feel left out.
“i hate you,” he groans, a playful pout forming on his lips. “why does he hate me so much when he’s sick?”
you let out a sleepy laugh, glancing at zion's scowling face. his little brow is furrowed, and he mutters, “daddy, stop. i don’t like you.”
the comment makes you chuckle. you hold zion tighter and kiss his cheeks, but he scrunches his face in irritation, clearly only wanting you to soothe him.
jungkook huffs, sitting up in disbelief. “you know he loves you—”
“i’m making breakfast,” jungkook mumbles, leaning over to kiss the top of your head. “want some coffee?”
you hum, your eyes still heavy with sleep. “i’d love some coffee,” you tell him. “... but i don’t have a coffee maker.”
jungkook nods, fully gaining consciousness now. “that’s fine. i’ll go out and buy some. i’ll be back.”
“okay,” you yawn, smiling at him. “sounds good, honey.”
as he gets up, zion whines softly, shifting closer to you, his little body still grumpy and unwilling to be touched by anyone but you. he buries his face in your side, and you can’t help but smile at the way he clings to you, seeking comfort while remaining stubbornly resistant to jungkook’s affection.
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by the time you and zion wake up and wash up, jungkook has a whole breakfast spread ready on the kitchen island.
“wow!” you say with excitement. “zi, look! daddy made so much breakfast—”
“no.” zion turns his cheek. "no thank you daddy."
“no? no thank you daddy?” jungkook chimes in, approaching zion. he offers his arms and zion turns his cheek at his own father. 
“no daddy. only mommy.” 
jungkook hisses. “yah, zion… it’s a little much now. i’m beginning to take it personally.” 
you laugh and reach for him. placing your hand on jungkook’s cheek, you run your thumb against his lips. “hi, honey. good morning. thanks for breakfast.”
jungkook smiles and leans over to you, ignoring zion being trapped in the middle. he kisses you softly. 
“good morning, beautiful—”
“no!” zion pushes jungkook’s chest. “stop it. my mommy. no kissing my mommy.”
jungkook rolls his eyes. “zi, do you know you wouldn’t exist right now if i didn’t kiss mommy?”
“honey!”
jungkook laughs and playfully pokes zion. at first, zion doesn’t like it but he breaks character and cracks a smile. soon enough, he begins to laugh and reaches for jungkook. happily, jungkook takes his child and shows him all the food he prepared. 
you watch them and can’t help but just feel… good. relieved and happy. 
it’s been a long time since you felt this way. 
jungkook hands you your coffee. you thank him and sip it. it tastes good. it tastes familiar, it tastes comforting… it tastes like it’s exactly what you need. 
“oh,” jungkook reaches inside his pocket and takes a box out. “this is for you.”
tiffany and co. 
you look at him, eyes wide and throat dry. 
jungkook bounces zion a few times before swinging him around. he then puts him down and points to his toys on the living room floor. zion smiles and runs to his toys. while jungkook is bent down, he changes his position and settles on one knee. 
he looks up at you.
“when i said that your career got in the way of us—that’s not what i meant to say. what i meant to say is that i missed you. back then, it felt like every time you came home; you just came home. you weren’t coming home to me—”
“jungkook, please understand that—”
“no,” he sniffs. “part of me fears that if i understand, i’ll agree with you—that we’ve messed up too much to fix this, that this is where we end. but i refuse to accept that. so, here’s my conclusion: even when i don’t understand you, i’ll love you through it. i will see through it. as crazy as it sounds, i believe in you more than myself. you won’t let me down, okay? i want to understand, even if i keep failing. just let me try—for the rest of my life. i love you, ___. i want to come home. i want to come home to you.”
he then opens the box and reveals the ring. 
it’s beautiful. 
“___, will you marry me?”
yes.
you want to say yes.
instead, you say; “what about new york?”
jungkook swallows.
“the offer is mine for one more week,” he explains. “new york is mine if i want it… but you’re what i want.”
“jungkook…”
“please,” he begs. “i don’t want to choose.”
you take a breath. 
“are you asking—no—telling me to?” you ask, your heart racing.
he doesn’t answer, and silence stretches between you, thick with unspoken words. each second feels like a lifetime, the weight of his gaze pulling you in. you can feel your pulse quicken, a mix of excitement and fear swirling inside you.
“is it really one or the other?” you finally ask, breaking the tension.
“i don’t know,” he replies, his voice barely above a whisper.
what does it mean to choose?
to say yes to one dream over another? the prospect of new york glimmers like a distant star, bright and promising, yet here in this moment, everything else fades. it’s just the two of you, the air is thin (as my waist).
you want to say yes, to embrace all the hurt and finally take it all... but doubts creep in—what if you choose him and he regrets it? what if you both lose everything? the future looms ahead, uncertain and daunting, but there’s also a warmth in your chest, a flicker of hope that maybe, just maybe, love is enough because timing is on your side. that maybe, after all these years falling asleep next to him; you two dream the same dream.
“jungkook,” you finally breathe, feeling the weight of your decision. the world outside blurs as you focus on the man in front of you, the man who has laid his heart bare. can love really be enough to hold you both together?
his eyes search yours, filled with an intensity that sends shivers down your spine. in this moment, every hesitation fades. you know that whatever you choose will shape not just your future, but both of yours.
you take a deep breath, the anticipation heavy in the air, and feel the gravity of the moment.
as you look into his eyes, you see a reflection of your own uncertainty mingled with hope. there’s something electric between you, an unspoken understanding that transcends words. the way he holds your gaze makes your heart race, a silent promise hanging in the balance.
time seems to stretch like a taut string, each heartbeat echoing in the silence as you search for answers in each other’s eyes. the world around you fades away, leaving only the two of you in this suspended moment. in this stillness of you and jungkook, you two want the same things;
for time to be on your side.
for love to be enough.
for the choice to be right.
662 notes · View notes
hyperactively-me · 1 year ago
Text
break in, break down
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"You're stayin' with me tonight," he declares, voice firm and unwavering. You open your mouth, nearly telling him no, I'll find a hotel, but the look he shoots you suggests that you go with him. With a nod of agreement, Simon leads you away from the scene, his hand on your back firm and reassuring.
this has been sitting in my drafts for like, ever. it's not the best cause its super old, like months old and i lowkey forgot i even had it, but it'll do for now while i'm in this writing rut.
happy reading <3
warnings: home invasion, panic attack reaction (i think that's it? lmk if i missed anything please!)
A loud bang reverberates through your apartment, your peaceful sleep interrupted.
You open your eyes with a start, the volume of the sound causing your heart race and your breath catch in your throat.
You're silent for another moment until the sound of glass shattering causes you to jump. You sit up now, dumbfounded for a brief moment before unshakable anxiety takes over.
There's no way this could be happening to you right now.
You immediately leap out of bed, grabbing a stray hoodie off the floor, slipping it over your thin pajamas. Next, you grab your phone with shaky hands, trembling from the adrenaline and anxiety coursing through your veins. The sounds from outside your bedroom are starting to get louder. You swipe your car keys from your drawer, shoving them into the pocket of your hoodie.
In a frenzy, you grope under your bed for a baseball bat, struggling to steady your shaking hands as you grip it tightly. The rattling of your doorknob nearly makes you pass out in fear. Simon had told you multiple times to keep your door locked when you sleep, stressing to you that it wasn't safe to leave it unlocked, especially at night.
There was no way you could escape through the hallway. Lucky for you, your apartment is on the first floor of the building, meaning that you would be able to safely jump out of your bedroom window without injuring yourself.
You place all your things down quickly, unlatching your window from its locks. You heave it open with all your might, grunting as you hold it up to lock it into an open position. Grabbing your baseball bat first, you throw it out the window and onto the grass below you. Could never be too safe.
Suddenly, the person or people on the other side of your door start kicking at it, the flimsy wood shaking from the impacts. You bite back a scream, prompting you to jump out of your window, dropping onto the grass below you clumsily.
You don't bother looking back as you sprint to your car in the adjacent parking lot, throwing yourself into the drivers seat unceremoniously.
Without another thought, you dial 911. Running on pure adrenaline, you tell the operator your address and the urgency of the situation. The kind voice on the other end tells you that the police are on their way before you hang up.
You bite back a sob as your shaking hands type in Simon's phone number. You hold your phone up to your, chewing your finger as it rings once, twice, and the line picks up.
"Hullo?" a scratchy, sleep-ridden voice on the other end of the line rings out. His accent sounds particularly thick.
"Simon," your voice breaks, the adrenaline now worn off, leaving you a wreck.
"What's wrong?" he asks immediately, now sounding more awake. You hear shuffling on the other end.
"I- I think my apartment got broken into," you sob, fat tears now freely falling down your cheeks. "I'm so scared," you cry, bawling like a baby.
Simon's voice takes on a sharp urgency. "'M coming over right now. Where are you? Are you hurt?"
"I'm in my car, in the parking lot," you say tearfully, trying to wipe the tears from your face unsuccessfully.
"I've already called 911; they're on the way—" you add, clutching onto your phone.
The sound of a door opening and slamming shut crackles through the phone. "Be there in ten. Stay on the line, love."
"I'm scared," you cry again, your free hand trembling as you reach to make sure your car door is locked.
"I know, love, I know. Just hang in there. 'M on my way," Simon reassures you, his voice gentle. The ten-minute wait feels like an eternity as you sit in your car, sniffling every so often as you look out your car windows to make sure no one is coming towards you.
Sirens wail in the distance, the police clearly arriving on scene. Despite the growing fear gnawing at you, Simon's voice provides a source of comfort.
"The police are almost here," you breath into the phone, pulling your knees up to your chest.
"Good, I'm here," he grunts. You look up and see his truck hurtling through the parking lot, stopping abruptly right behind your car. He slides out of his car, rushing to the drivers side of your car.
The moment he reaches your car, you throw open the door and practically fall into his arms. Simon holds you tight as you fall into him, sobs wracking your body.
"Don't cry," he soothes, pulling you tighter against him. "'S alright, 's handled."
He cradles you in his grasp, running his hand over your hair as you sob into his t-shirt, fists bunching up the fabric. You cling to him as if he's your lifeline, the scent of his t-shirt grounding you ever so slightly.
"I've got you," he murmurs, rubbing your back.
Your sobs gradually subside into quiet sniffles, and you take a deep breath.
The distant wailing of sirens grows closer, indicating the police are here. Simon releases you just enough to glance over his shoulder at the approaching vehicles. "The police are here," you whisper, your voice shaky but relieved.
The flashing lights of police cars illuminate the surroundings as officers approach. Simon steps back, maintaining a protective stance beside you.
Two police officers approach you and Simon, asking for details about the break-in. You pull at the hem of your hoodie, trying to cover up your practically bare thighs from your tiny pajamas. Simon settles his hand on your lower back, encouraging you to speak to the officers. You recount the events timidly, telling them as much as you know. After providing your statement, the police assure you they'll investigate your apartment, but advise you that it's not the best to stay there tonight. For obvious reasons.
Upon their insistence of you spending the night somewhere else, before you could even open your mouth, Simon is insisting, no, demanding that you stay with him for the night.
"You're stayin' with me tonight," he declares, voice firm and unwavering.
You open your mouth, nearly telling him no, I'll find a hotel, but the look he shoots you suggests that you go with him.
With a nod of agreement, Simon leads you away from the scene, his hand on your back firm and reassuring.
As you approach his truck, Simon opens the door for you. He helps you up into the passenger seat, making sure you're settled before closing the door with a determined thud. Simon then strides around to the driver's side, the scent of him lingering in the air as he gets in. The engine roars to life, and you find comfort in the steady hum of the engine.
The drive to Simon's place is mostly quiet. He occasionally glances at you, concern etched into his features. You stare out of the window, the events of the night replaying in your mind. You shiver in your seat, thinking about what could have happened if you hadn't escaped through your window. Simon's hand finds yours, a silent gesture that makes your heart ache with gratitude.
As you pull into Simon's driveway, you're met with the warm glow of his porch light. The familiar sight brings a new sense of relief. It's not the first time you've been to his quaint home. Simon turns off the engine, and without a word, he's at your side, opening the door for you again.
He leads you inside, the click of the door shutting behind you echoing in the quiet house. Simon heads to the kitchen, rummaging through cabinets. Moments later, he appears with a mug of tea, a small but comforting gesture. He hands it to you, the warmth seeping into your cold hands.
"Drink this. It'll help calm your nerves," he says, his voice gentle.
You take a sip, the familiar taste of chamomile offering a small respite. Simon sits across from you, watching as you try to steady your trembling hands. The silence between you isn't uncomfortable; it's a shared understanding that words might not be enough to mend the damage that's been dealt.
After a while, Simon breaks the silence. "I'll make up the spare room for you. Take your time. We'll deal with everythin' in the morning."
He disappears down the hall, leaving you alone in the living room. You look around his living room, eyeing his front door for a brief moment. You finish the tea and set the mug on the coffee table, feeling a wave of exhaustion wash over you.
When you enter the spare room, you find it tidy and pretty bare. The scent of clean sheets and the comforting atmosphere of his home a stark difference from your own. You watch as he double checks the windows to make sure they're locked tight. He also shows you the lock on your own bedroom door.
"Everythin' is secure, 've triple checked it all," Simon states, turning from the window to look at you. His concern is evident in his eyes, and you nod in response.
"Thank you, Simon. I appreciate all of this," you say, your voice quiet.
He moves over to the wall, crouching down to plug a night light into the wall. He taps it a few times to make sure it works. When it flickers on, he grunts, satisfied. Pushing himself up to standing, he walks over to you.
He gives you a reassuring smile. "No need to thank me. 'S the least I can do. You get some rest. 'M right across the hall if you need anything."
With that, he leaves the room, gently closing the door behind him. You make sure to lock the door behind him as he leaves. You crawl into bed, pulling the covers over your weary body, exhaustion settling in.
You close your eyes, hoping that sleep will offer some reprieve. As you lay there, the events of the night replay in your mind. The fear, the vulnerability, and the violation of your home weigh heavily on you. Slight sounds make you jump in fear, and all of a sudden you start to breath heavily. You can't be in here, not alone.
You stumble out of the room, practically falling into the hallway. The dim glow of the nightlight casts long shadows, and you feel a shiver run down your spine. Determined, you make your way to Simon's door and knock softly.
The door opens, and Simon appears, concern etched on his face. "Everythin' alright, love?"
You can barely form the words, your voice barely a whisper. "Can't stay in there alone."
Without hesitation, Simon opens the door wider, gesturing for you to enter. His room is dark, all lights off. You step inside his room, tugging your hoodie tighter around your body. You settle onto the edge of his bed, wrapping your arms around yourself as if to ward off the residual fear.
Simon shuts and locks the door behind him, plunging you both into darkness, save for the slight shine of the moon pouring through between a crack in his curtains.
Simon stands in front of you, looking down with a mix of empathy and concern in his eyes. "You're welcome to stay as long as you need. I don't mind."
"Thank you," you manage to say, the vulnerability in your voice more pronounced in the darkness of the room.
Simon hesitates for a moment before flicking on a small bedside lamp. The soft light casts a warm glow across the room, revealing a space that's both lived-in and comforting. You feel a bit more at ease.
He pulls a chair from his desk and sits across from you, leaving a respectful distance. The silence between you is filled with unspoken words, the weight of the night's events hanging in the air. Simon's gaze is unwavering, and you find solace in the fact that he understands what you need without the need for words.
As the minutes tick by, the atmosphere in the room becomes less tense. Simon breaks the silence, his voice a gentle murmur. "I don't want you to go through this alone. You deserve to feel safe, love."
You manage a weak smile, touched by his sincerity. "Thank you, Simon. You really don't have to be doing all of this for me--"
"Don't say that, I want to," he cuts you off gruffly, offended as if you would even suggest that you weren't worthy enough of his care.
His response hangs in the air, and you notice a flicker of something in Simon's eyes—a hint of frustration or something deeper. The unspoken tension lingers, causing you to shift slightly.
"I just... I don't want you to feel unsafe," Simon adds, his voice softer this time. He leans forward, resting his arms on his knees, his gaze fixed on yours. "Or alone. Fuckin' hell, if you hadn't been able to get out of there..."
He stops, jaw ticking as he thinks. He can't even say it.
The room feels charged with unspoken emotions, and you sense a vulnerability in Simon that mirrors your own.
"Simon," you say softly, your voice a gentle reassurance, "I feel safe with you."
"I've... 've cared about you for a long time, maybe more than I should," Simon admits, his words hanging in the air like a fragile confession.
The vulnerability in his admission tugs at your heart, and you find yourself pushing yourself up off the edge of the bed, cupping his face in your hands.
"I've cared about you too," you confess, the weight of the unspoken finally lifted.
He looks up, meeting your eyes with a mixture of relief and adoration. Simon's hand reaches up to grasp your wrist lightly, his thumb tracing gentle circles on the back of your hand, his eyes searching yours for confirmation.
"I never want you to feel unsafe or alone again. I can't stand the thought of somethin' happenin' t' you."
Your heart swells at the sincerity of his words, and you lean down, pressing a gentle kiss to his cheek.
The conversation lulls, and for a moment, it's just the two of you in the sanctuary of Simon's bedroom. The emotional exhaustion begins to take its toll, and your eyes grow heavy.
He stands from his chair, grasping your upper arms gently, leading you towards his bed once again. Before he sits you down, he looks at you expectantly.
"Is this what you want?"
"Yes," you nod, "I've never wanted anything more."
With your permission, he lays you down on his bed, following you into the bed with a contained eagerness. He drags you up until you're settled on a pillow. Simon slides into the mattress right next to you, pulling the covers up and over the both of you. You turn on your side to face him, eyes searching his face just before he turns off the lamp, plunging you both into darkness.
Simon's hand brushes against your forearm, seeking permission yet again. You scoot over until you're flush against him, cheeks heating up at the proximity. You feel Simon's warm presence beside you, his hand finding its place on your waist before he pulls you up against him, cuddling you. Simon's fingers trace patterns on your back, a soothing motion that pulls you deeper into relaxation.
"Get some rest. I'll be right here if you need anything, love," Simon whispers, playing with the ends of your hair.
"Thank you," you whisper into the darkness, your voice barely audible but carrying a depth of gratitude.
He tightens his grip on your waist, a silent affirmation that he's here for you, that you're not alone. The warmth of his touch and the gentle rise and fall of his breath provide a sense of security that eases the lingering tension in your body.
. . . 
The morning light begins to seep through the curtains, casting a soft glow in Simon's room. As you slowly awaken, the events of the previous night come back to you in fragments. You turn slightly to find Simon still asleep beside you, his features softened by the morning light. His arm is draped protectively over you, and a sense of peace settles in the room. For a moment, you simply revel in the quiet stillness, savoring the moment.
As Simon begins to stir, his eyes meet yours, and a sleepy smile tugs at the corners of his lips. "Mornin’," he murmurs, his voice husky with sleep.
"Morning," you reply, a small smile playing on your lips. The air in the room feels different, more relaxed.
Simon props himself up on one elbow, his gaze searching yours. "How are you feeling?"
"Better than I thought I would," you admit, a genuine warmth in your voice. "Still kinda freaked out that people broke in to my apartment, but better."
He nods thoughtfully. "We should probably get up, check in with the police," Simon suggests, but there's a reluctance in his eyes to let go of the warmth of the bed.
You cuddle against him once more, hugging him tightly. His arm comes to wrap around your back, hand splayed across your skin.
"Yeah, we should," you say, pulling away gently as you push yourself out of bed.
"We're goin' together," he tells you. "And I will be installing a new security system in your apartment."
You manage a small smile. "I don't think you understand how much I appreciate you for this."
He sighs as he leads you to his small kitchen. "You never have to thank me for anything, love."
Before you can retort, he turns to you. "Let's get some breakfast in ya. How do you like your eggs?"
2K notes · View notes
oizysian · 1 year ago
Text
Like The Mutt You Are | Wanda Maximoff
Pairing: Vampire!Wanda Maximoff x Pet!Reader Warnings: non-con, cnc, blood, magic penises Word Count: 3.2k Genre: smut Summary: A young girl finds herself in the possession of a Queen vampire, chosen as her new pet.
•Kinktober Masterlist•
Lady Maximoff was the most influential vampire in Old New York. She owned most of the human cattle in the state and held the most power on the east coast. Other vampires respected her, humans feared her, and children were raised with the horror of her deeds as reminders of what would happen to them if they acted out of line.
Those not categorized as human cattle were just as unfortunate, paying a blood debt to Lady Maximoff to keep their “freedom.” The families that couldn’t afford to pay their debt either gave up what little freedoms they had, or they had to sacrifice one of their family members.
Y/N’s family was currently drowning in their blood debt, unable to pay their monthly dues, so they had no other choice; they had to give Lady Maximoff one of their own.
“I’m sorry, Y/N,” her father spoke softly, his eyes downcast towards the ground. “We just can’t do it anymore.”
“But, she’ll kill me!” She cried, pushing back the tears that threatened to spill down her cheeks.
“I’m sorry.” He repeated, wrapping his arm around his sobbing wife. “We just can’t give any more blood.”
She cried then, bawling into her hands as the realization began to hit her. She was going to die at the hands of this bitch of a vampire. She hated them. She hated her.
“I can’t believe you’re doing this.” She whimpered softly, her voice cracking with emotion.
She knew it would only be a matter of time before they would come for her, binding her in chains and stripping her from all of her freedoms, how few of them there were.
Before anything more could be said, there was a knock at the door. Y/N’s skin crawled with abject terror as she realized what was to happen to her.
Her father looked at her for a long moment before releasing his wife, heading for the front door where three very large men stood.
“We’re here for Y/N Y/L/N.”
“No!” She cried, nearly falling to her knees in distress.
They approached wordlessly, grabbing her by the arms and binding them behind her back with thick, heavy handcuffs and chains.
“No, please, papa!” She cried as they dragged her out, her screams echoing throughout the house.
Her parents turned away, unable to watch as their only daughter was given to one of the most dangerous monsters in the country.
Her screams continued as they loaded her into the van they came in, throwing her in the back, the chains heavily falling against her. She sobbed as one man got in the back with her and the other two got in the front seat, wordlessly pulling away from her childhood home.
“Where are you taking me?” She asked the man softly, but he just stared straight ahead, ignoring her words.
She sniffled, wiping her face on her sleeve and eyed the doors to her freedom.
“Don���t even think about it.” He growled, grabbing her chains and tugging on them, forcing her to the ground in front of him. “You ain’t going nowhere.”
She panted softly, looking up at him. Could she take him? Absolutely not. Would she die anyway if she didn’t try to escape? Definitely.
She pushed away from him and rushed towards the doors, the chains clanging as she tugged on the handles. He growled at her, his fangs elongating in his anger as he grabbed her by the shoulders, throwing her back. The chains fell on top of her and she cried, her only escape plan failing.
“You’re going to our Queen, bitch. You belong to her now.”
‘Queen?’ She thought. ‘They consider her their Queen?’
It was hours later when they finally arrived in the heart of the city, where Lady Maximoff resided. Y/N felt weak, hopeless, and all but gave up on her freedom. It was over for her.
The van came to a stop and moments later, the doors swung open, the two men from earlier stood there waiting for her to come out. She stayed still, unmoving, until the vampire in the van with her grabbed her and pulled her out with him.
She fell to the ground in a heap, her shoulders shaking with choking sobs.
“Get up.” One of them snarled, and the other one nudged her with his foot. “Get up!”
“Fuck you!” She cried, pushing herself away from them.
“Get …” he grabbed her by the back of her shirt, dragging her to her feet. “Up!”
She stood between the men, her back slouched, her head hanging as they pushed her to walk forward.
She followed closely behind as they walked, entering the large building ahead of them. When they entered, it was obvious that this was no ordinary establishment. There were cages all over; lining the wall, hanging from the ceilings, with people inside - old people, young people, naked people.
She backed up and hit the body of the man walking behind her.
“Move.” He growled, pushing her into the man in front of her.
She caught herself before she fell, her hands pressing into the vampire’s back. He smelt like smoke and death and she felt that nothing would ever get that smell out of her nose.
They led her into a cold room where other captives were standing on a stage before a woman sitting in, what looked like, a throne. Y/N’s eyes were round like saucers at the sight of her. That was Lady Maximoff.
They pushed her up the steps of the stage and she stumbled as she climbed, lugging behind her the heavy chains.
“What have you brought me this time?” A delicate voice spoke.
“The exchanges, my Queen.” One said, getting on one knee in front of her.
“Ah, yes.” She directed her attention towards the people on the stage. “Your families sold you to save themselves. I want you to remember that as you die.”
A young girl cried out and all the vampires watching in the crowd laughed. Y/N wished she could just kill them all. If she could kill the Queen, they’d all be free … right?
She got off of her throne and walked up to the stage, examining all of the captives superficially. She wasn’t particularly impressed with this group.
“Send them off to the cattle house. I’ve no use for any of them.”
One of the vampires grabbed at Y/N and she elbowed him in the stomach, the chains hitting him in the crotch.
The Queen stood and watched as this lone girl fought back, amused by the display.
“Stop.” She said calmly and the vampires holding down Y/N ceased their actions.
The battered girl looked down at the woman, a fire in her eyes that Lady Maximoff had never seen before.
“Leave that one.”
Others began screaming and crying, begging for mercy from the woman, but were ignored and led out to be taken to the cattle houses, to be used and then killed when no longer usable.
The Queen gestured to Y/N with her finger, beckoning her to walk over to her. Y/N eyed her for a moment before making her way to the edge of the stage, cautiously watching her footing as she walked.
Red wisps came towards her from within the Queen and she was lifted up off the stage and pulled to the other woman, mere inches away from her face, noses practically touching.
“You smell divine.” She whispered, inhaling the girl's scent deeply.
She struggled against the foreign magic, trying desperately to break free from it.
“You’re afraid.” She tilted her head. “And oh, so angry. You want me dead.”
Y/N gritted her teeth, not willing to admit to being afraid or being angry. She wouldn’t give this bitch the time of day.
“So much anger within you.” She smiled, her fangs almost glistening in the light. “I can’t wait to fuck it out of you.”
She spit at her then, right in her face, and Lady Maximoff didn’t even flinch.
“I’ll have fun breaking you.”
She wiped the spit off of her cheek and turned on her heel, walking out of the room with Y/N floating close behind her.
“Let me go, you bitch!” She screamed, still wriggling to get out of her binds, but it was no use.
Lady Maximoff didn’t even turn around as she flicked her fingers, the wisps tightening around the other girl.
“Stay quiet, little pup. You need to learn some manners.”
She could feel the Queen inside of her head, like maggots in an open wound. She groaned softly, images and feelings unfamiliar to her suddenly flooding her senses.
“I’ll make you feel good, pet. You’ll see.”
“No!” She grunted. “Fuck you!”
Lady Maximoff did nothing but laugh as the bound girl was forced to follow her, leading her up spiral stairs to a large bedroom with double doors. The furniture and décor was all dark, some candles burning provided extra light, but the fireplace was where most of it came from. It was a beautiful room and if she wasn’t being held captive, she might’ve complimented it.
“Now, what shall I do with you first, hmm?” She asked playfully, tapping her chin with her finger.
“Let me go!”
“No, I won’t be doing that.” She finally turned to face the other girl, walking up to her and touching her chest beneath the wisps. “You’re very beautiful, you know that?”
Y/N just bit her lip, as staying silent seemed to be the best bet at this point. Lady Maximoff tilted her head ever so slightly and brought her hand up to the young girl's head.
She tried to jerk herself back, but still was unable to move as she raised her fingers to her forehead.
Y/N moaned softly as feelings of absolute pleasure invaded her mind and body, her virgin pussy reacting to the images the vampire witch was putting into her head.
“S-stop,” she moaned, the wisps loosening and caressing her instead of binding her. “Please …”
“Please, what, pet?” She cooed, taking her time in unbuttoning the slacks the girl was wearing and tugging them down as the dark magic she was using slid underneath her shirt, swirling around her breasts.
She let out a shuddering moan as Lady Maximoff slipped two fingers between her folds, collecting her wetness and bringing it up to the girl's face, smiling as she did so.
“So needy. So ready for me.”
“Don’t, please!” She trembled as the vampire slipped her fingers into her own waiting mouth, tasting her new precious pet.
“You are the sweetest thing I’ve ever tasted.” She was nearly intoxicated by the taste and smell of her. “I don’t think I’ll be able to get enough of you.”
With a flick of her wrist, the remainder of her clothing and her chains were gone and she hovered naked, teased, in the middle of the room. Lady Maximoff admired her, watching excitedly as her nipples turned into hardened rosy peaks and inhaled deeply to smell the wetness dripping down her legs.
The girl trembled, aroused and afraid - afraid of what this woman was capable of. How could she make her feel like this? What kind of witchcraft was at work here?
“Chaos magic, darling.” She said with a smile, running her nails gently down her chest to her belly. “You’ll love what I can do with it, I promise.”
The Queen stripped herself of her own clothing, slowly, to give the girl a show. To her delight, the girls arousal grew at the sight of her naked body and she knew that she wouldn’t have to use her magic on her mind for very much longer.
“I’m going to give you a little demonstration.”
The girl was laid out on the bed, her hands and feet bound with chaos magic, and from between her spread legs, a dick grew, tall and proud. Y/N watched as the vampire crawled onto the bed with her, and couldn’t hold back the guttural moan that escaped her lips when she wrapped her long fingers around her brand new cock.
“Feels good, doesn’t it?” She stroked her cock and Y/N shuddered under her touch, her hips bucking upward to meet her rhythm. “I’m gonna fuck myself with your pretty little cock.”
She cried, tears spilling down her cheeks as her precum spread along her length.
“Well, ‘little’ isn’t the right word, is it?” She smiled, straddling the young girl and positioning herself above the erect magical dick. “I made you very well endowed.”
“Please, don’t, it feels …!”
She moaned loudly as the vampire lowered herself down, slowly, as to accustom herself to the girth of the cock.
“Yes, pet. It feels amazing, doesn’t it?”
The young girl cried as her cock twitched inside of her, the new feelings overwhelming and nearly overstimulating. The enchanted cock let her feel every delicious bit of Lady Maximoff’s pussy, and she couldn’t help but be intoxicated by it.
She rode Y/N, her hands gripping her breasts as she thrust herself down hard and fast. The vampire knew that the girl wouldn’t last long, but that was the point. She would get her pet addicted to her pussy so she would beg to please her.
“L-Lady Maximoff!” She cried, her hips jerking underneath her. “Stop! You’re gonna …”
She felt the hot cum shoot up inside her before she saw the girl react to the fact that she had came. She flung her head back on the pillows and let out a yell, her cock twitching and pulsating inside other woman.
Lady Maximoff smiled triumphantly, milking Y/N for all that she was worth. She loved the feeling of being full, but especially being full of her cum. Her new pet was beginning to be very special to her.
“L-let go,” she whimpered, her hips moving against her will. “I can’t do it again.”
“Yes you can, darling.” She cooed. “Once more for your Queen.”
She bit her lip and thrust her hips up against her, making the vampire moan with complete satisfaction. Not only was she a good fuck, but she was an obedient one.
She brought her hand down to play with her pussy, her strong, talented fingers rubbing circles along her clit. She let out a little moan, her brow furrowing and her eyes falling shut as she came.
She milked the poor, abused cock and Y/N couldn’t help but cum inside of her again, another pathetic cry spilling from her lips as she lost all control.
“Poor little pup,” she breathed softly, watching as the other girl came down from her high. “So pathetic and needy. I can help you.” She leaned down and pressed her lips to Y/N’s, a chaste kiss only to get a little taste of her. “I can make you feel good forever.”
“No …” she cried, her dick twitching once again as the vampire cockwarmed her.
“Oh, yes.” She kissed her once more, this time piercing her lower lip with her fangs and licking up the little droplets of blood that trickled down her chin. “You’re mine forever, my pet.”
She finally released her cock, pulling herself off and laying down beside her. She flicked her fingers at the enchanted penis and it disappeared, but the feeling between Y/N’s legs remained.
“I have a present for you, my darling.” She said playfully, propping herself up on her elbow and admiring the mess she had made of the girl.
Around Y/N’s neck appeared a collar, complete with a name tag and leash. She struggled to look down at it, only being able to feel it in the position she was being held in.
“What should we have the name tag say, hmm? Mutt? Pup? Bitch?”
“Let me go,” she whimpered pathetically, trying and failing to press her legs together to ease the painful ache between them left from Lady Maximoff’s magic. “Please.”
“You don’t really want to leave me, do you?” She asked sweetly, her fingers drawing imaginary shapes on her belly.
Her stomach twitched and her skin was hot with arousal. She was unable to deny the fact that this woman now had a hold on her. She was in her mind, and soon she would be in her body.
“I know you don’t.” She cooed, pouting playfully as her fingers worked their way up Y/N’s bare chest, teasing each rosy nipple to a hardened bud before slipping up her neck; two fingers finding their way inside the girl's opened mouth. “Suck them.”
The girl shook her head, refusing, before Lady Maximoff’s eyes turned red, and suddenly she was taking her fingers eagerly, swirling her tongue around the intrusive digits as they pumped in and out of her mouth slowly.
“That’s a good girl. Get them nice and wet for me.” She watched as she took her fingers with ease and her mind wandered, wondering what she would look like on her knees, taking her cock.
She pulled out of her mouth, her fingers wet with saliva and absolutely ready to explore the virgin pussy before her.
“I promise I’ll be gentle.” She smiled as she brought her hand down between Y/N’s legs, slipping her fingers between her slick folds.
She moaned, her hips rising as she eased her fingers inside of her, slowly at first, gently, but then the feeling of her became too much, and her thrusts quickened.
She let out a whimper of pain, despite being under the Queen’s complete control, and began to cry.
“No tears, dove.” She said as she fucked her, her fingers now easing in and out of her pretty pussy. “My little pet will feel so good now. So good.”
She let her thumb caress her clit and she twitched, her pussy pulsing with a need the girl was unfamiliar with.
“Do you need more, my pet? Shall I add another finger to your needy pussy?”
“No …” she cried, but Lady Maximoff smiled and shook her head.
She pulled out, adding another digit before slipping back inside, Y/N letting out a throaty moan at the feel.
“Yes, it does feel good, doesn’t it?” She fucked her harder, faster, hitting the deepest parts of her, curling her fingers and playing with her throbbing clit. “Come undone for me, pet. Come all over my fingers.”
The red wisps of magic slid along her body, heightening the sensations and pushing her over the edge, her legs jerking as she came.
“Unh … oh, Lady Maximoff!” She cried, tears in her eyes and drool dripping down her chin; a wisp curled around her neck and slipped into her mouth, pumping in and out.
“Mm, I’m still not done with you.” She purred, bringing her fingers up to her face and putting them in her mouth, sucking them clean. “I’ll never be done with you.”
She moaned around the wisp, flinching as she felt it jerk and twitch with pleasure inside of her mouth.
“Suck it, darling. It’s good practice.”
She obeyed, her head bobbing as the dark magic inside her mouth spurt gobs of its masters cum into her waiting orifice.
The Queen moaned as she and her magic came, smirking slightly as the wisp left her mouth and left a trail of drool and cum in its wake.
“You’ve made such a mess.” She said condescendingly, tutting her. “I’ll have to hose you down like the mutt you are.”
@natashaswife4125, @poison-blackheart
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illubean · 5 months ago
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hey ! can you write for the main four of hxh, where the reader is like immortal but the 4 don’t know and think they “died” but just comes back after like a couple lonngggg seconds? idk if this is weird but thanks!
Main 4 (HXH) w/ an Immortal!Reader
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Characters: Gon Freecs, Killua Zoldyck, Kurapika Kurta, Leorio Paladaknight Type: Headcanons, Gn!Reader
not telling them beforehand is EVIL
Warnings: mentions of death
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Gon Freecs
alright so for some reason you're fighting someone/thing
and right as you land the final blow they also manage to get a lethal hit in and you "die"
he is literally sobbing while laying on your chest as you take your sweet time to revive...
he is literally bawling his eyes out and feels so guilty because he couldn't help you :((
and then when he feels a hand on his head and hears "now what are you crying about?"
he literally shoots up in surprise
"You're alive!?" "Yeah, I'm literally immortal."
he's too distressed to even question you further and just opts to hug you tightly
he might ask you about it later, but for now he just needs the comfort of your embrace
Killua Zoldyck
this poor kid :(
he's literally already traumatized by everything his family has done to him now THIS?
he's another one who cries because he couldn't protect you
little does he know he doesn't have to
and when you come back like "heyyyy :p" he jumps like 50 feet from you
"What the hell!?" "My bad, took a little longer to come back this time than I thought." "WHAT DO YOU MEAN THIS TIME????"
and you explain you're immortal and hes like HAAHH!?
he angrily wipes all of his tears away before beating you over the top of your head
he plays things off as him just being mad you didn't tell him about your ability
but really he's glad that you didn't actually kick the bucket
Kurapika Kurta
he literally lost his entire clan when he was like 12
so you "dying" to who or whatever just piles on top of the darkness in his heart
cue the red eyes ooohhh
he will quickly finish off whoever "killed" you and during that time boom you're back
"Look's like you took care of things here. Thanks Kurapika :D"
he gives himself whiplash with how fast he turns around
at first he is very wary because what if the enemy has some sort of ability to reanimate your body
but then you tell him you're immortal
and he's like oh...
bye bye red eyes
"You should've told me that earlier"
he just sighs and brings you somewhere else to make sure that you're really okay
Leorio Paladaknight
Leorio has a big heart and values his relationships
so when you "die" in front of him he is in arguably more distress than anyone else on the list
he doesn't just accept the fact that you're "dead"
he is literally crying screaming about to throw up
he's like NOOOO WHYYY WHYYYYYYYY YOU CANT BE DEAD NOOOOOOOOOOO
and you come back like just kidding :p not deaddd
he's literally screaming at you and shaking you back and forth by your shoulders
"WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU!? NOT FUNNY, THATS NOT FUNNY AT ALL!"
after that he pauses then starts screaming at you even louder to explain how you came back to life
"ARE YOU A ZOMBIE!?!!?!?"
and when you tell him his frantic yelling does not stop...
good luck shutting him up
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starlightkun · 2 months ago
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❥・word count: 25.5k ❥・genre: fluff, enemies to lovers, single dad kun, single mom reader, there is some angst but not between reader and kun, more-so around them in terms of like life events ❥・warnings: cursing, kid on kid violence (biting lol) ❥・extra info: people are called ‘mommy’ and ‘daddy’ in this so if u can’t be normal abt that maybe skip this one ❥・author’s note: omggg it’s finally here! this one has been a wip for like literally like 1.5 yrs i think? anyway im absolutely in love w single dad kun in this one, and i hope u guys fall in love w him too 🫶
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“Mr. Qian, I’m failing to see how this is any of your concern.”
“Because you’re treating my kid like he’s a felon.”
“Well yours treated mine like a chew toy so excuse me for exercising some caution,” you finally snapped, tightening your grip around your son and cradling the back of his head.
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PART I: moments turn to dreams within my mind
Woobin had always been a kid with big feelings, from big smiles to big tears, and as his mom you encouraged him to feel those big feelings when they came. Your older cousin often warned you that you were raising a “crybaby,” but you brushed off her attempts at parenting advice. You’d rather have your Woobin and all his softness than her kid who screamed and threw his monster trucks at the wall at the slightest provocation.
But that didn’t make it any easier for you to walk in and see your son bawling by himself in the corner of his classroom when you went to pick him up from preschool that afternoon. You immediately skirted around a couple other kids and parents to kneel down beside him, feeling your heart breaking as you rubbed his back, “Binnie, Binnie, hey, hey, hey. Mommy’s here.”
You caught the three-year-old by the underarms before he could throw his arms around your neck. His face was bright red, eyes puffy from clearly how hard he had been crying, and snot and spit coated his chin.
“Wait a second, Binnie, I know,” you kept your voice level and calm despite how frantic you felt. “Is it a scary cry or a boo-boo cry?”
It took him several deep inhales and sniffling exhales before he could sob out, “Scary and boo-boo cry, Mommy!”
“Oh, baby,” you immediately enfolded him in your arms, cradling him to your chest gently. “What hurts, Binnie? Can you show me the boo-boo?”
It was then that one of his teachers finally joined you, an apologetic look on her face, “Ms. Y/N, I am so sorry. We would have called, but it happened right before the end of the school day.”
“What happened?”
“Woobin had an incident with another friend.”
“An incident? What sort of incident?” You looked around for another crying kid, expecting that they both had gotten hurt doing something together.
Woobin had just pulled up the left sleeve of his whale patterned longsleeve shirt when his teacher explained to you, “Woobin got bit.”
And there, on your son’s upper arm was the bright red imprint of teeth marks. In fact, it seemed to have been so recent that you could still see the indents in his skin. You were filled with such a burning, white hot rage that your skin tingled and if you weren’t already holding Woobin, you think you would’ve swung on someone. You liked to consider yourself a level-headed person, in control of your emotions, but it was practically all out the window in that moment.
“He got bit?” You repeated her phrasing incredulously. “You mean another kid bit him.”
“I understand that this can be upsetting—”
“How did this happen?” You demanded, pulling Woobin’s sleeve back down and wrapping your arms around him tighter. “What were you doing?”
“Ma’am, I think it would be best for all of us to have a discussion about this together.”
“All of us? Including the biter’s parents? I want to know what you are going to do to make sure my child is safe at your preschool before I even think about bringing him back here, much less have some mediation like he’s at fault as much as the kid who bit him.”
The teacher paused, as if waiting to see if you were done, before speaking again, “Ms. Y/N, it is our policy in such incidents to have a meeting between school personnel and the guardians of both involved children, regardless of... injury. In order for Woobin to keep his spot, you two are required to attend this meeting. We understand if you wish to seek out different accommodations for him, however, we’ve found that all parties are typically satisfied with the outcome of this process. I highly encourage you try it, and if you still want to pull Woobin from our program after, that is of course your decision as his mother.”
Your chest was heaving as you took deep breaths, clenching your jaw as you stared her down. After a few moments of deliberation and listening to your son’s continued sobs, you let out a short and bitter sigh, “When would this meeting be?”
“After school tomorrow. Will you be available then?”
“Fine. Yes,” you stood up with your boy still in your arms, shifting him onto your hip. “But Woobin will not be at school tomorrow.”
“He will be missed,” she nodded with that same placid smile.
As you stalked out of the classroom, you passed by a father and son speaking to the other teacher.
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The next day, you dropped Woobin off at your parents’ place with a peck on his forehead and profuse ‘thank you’s to them. You had vented to your mother on the phone the night prior, after putting your son to bed, finally letting loose all the obscenities that you had wanted to in the preschool. Your mom gladly took her grandson for the day before shooing you off to work.
You then had to leave work a little early to pick Woobin up from your parents’ to take him to the preschool since the meeting was to take place right after the school day ended. For some godforsaken reason that escaped you, they required the kids to be in attendance at the meeting too. As if your three-year-old was really going to be testifying about the entire situation. The most him being there could accomplish was prove that he had a bite mark, which a picture on your phone could also do.
After a “give ‘em hell” from your mom, and an offer to come along from your dad, which you contemplated for a moment, then declined, you started for the school. While your dad coming along would make you feel better, it would also make you feel like you were buying your first car again and were afraid of the salesman trying to scam you for being a woman. This was a meeting about the welfare and treatment of your son, you could do this.
Standing in the lobby with some other parents who were milling around, waiting for the respective classrooms to announce they were ready for pick-up, you found yourself tapping your foot impatiently. The 1-year-olds picked up first, then the 2-year-olds. As those families filtered out, you were left with only a few parents, as this section of the school only went up to 3-year-olds. The 4-year-olds went to a different wing of the building for VPK, and you knew that the other buildings on the rather expansive campus held an elementary, middle, and even high school.
You felt Woobin shift in your arms to get comfortable, and readjusted him to your other hip, “Sorry, Binnie, I know you’re tired.”
“Do you two want to sit?” A voice spoke up from behind you.
You turned around and had to look down at a man in a suit sitting on one of the padded benches in the lobby. He was presumably some kind of businessman from the nice upkeep and fit of his suit, even as he had loosened the tie a little bit for being off of work. His handsome, friendly smile would’ve made your heart skip a beat on any other day, if you weren’t on a mission today.
All of the seating had been taken up when you got there, and you didn’t even think to look around for open spots as other parents started to leave.
The man shifted to one end, gesturing towards the open spots that could fit probably three adults comfortably. You smiled at him gratefully, “Oh, yes, thank you.”
You sat down, keeping your sleepy Woobin on your lap. Being at his grandparents’ today had thrown off his usual nap schedule, and you rubbed his back soothingly. Rolling up his sleeve which was on the side opposite from the man, you inspected the bite mark. It had blossomed into a rather gnarly bruise overnight, all blue and purple, and it only made anger churn again in your chest. He hadn’t given any indication that it still hurt as you fixed his sleeve, thumb tenderly swiping over the area after.
Finally, the three-year-old class was dismissed for pick-up, and the other parents gathered their children. You hung back, waiting for all of them to filter out, before you approached the classroom. You figured the parents of the biter would still be in there, but hadn’t expected the man who had offered you a seat to be the one there with another little boy and the teachers.
“Wonderful, everyone is here,” Mrs. Chen, the older of the two teachers, announced.
“Qian Kun.” The man took it upon himself to do the introductions, bowing to you politely. He then ruffled the hair of the boy standing beside him, just above knee-height, “And this is my son Junyi. I am deeply sorry for Junyi biting Woobin, Miss…?”
“Y/L/N Y/N,” you half-nodded half-bowed back to him as best you could with Woobin in your arms. “And before we get into all that, what I really want to know is—” You rounded on the teachers. “How this could have even happened.”
Ms. Xu, the younger teacher with whom you had spoken yesterday, opened a door on the far side of the classroom, “Of course. We’ll be having the meeting in here.”
With a short sigh at how your question was once again brushed off, you stepped into the interior office space. It looked like it must be where the teachers took their breaks and did any sort of administrative work. A few desks were against the walls, closed laptops and bags set on a couple of them. There was a table set up in the middle, four chairs around it, and a small area with toys off to the side.
“We have a place over there for the children to play while we discuss,” Ms. Xu smiled, gesturing to the toys you’d spotted when you walked in.
Mr. Qian nodded, gently directing his son towards them, “Go on and play for a bit, Junyi. Daddy’s going to talk right over here, okay?”
Junyi toddled over and plopped himself down on the playmat, picking up a truck and doll, easily entertaining himself. The other three adults looked to you and your son expectantly.
“Thank you, but Woobin is going to be staying with me,” you informed them. All the talking had made Woobin stir, but he seemed rather content in your arms anyway, simply looking between all the adults with big, curious eyes.
“Ms. Y/L/N, I assure you, I had a talk with Junyi last night and again this morning about not biting our friends. He shouldn’t be doing that anymore.”
“And I assure you, Mr. Qian, my concerns are not about your parenting,” you told him frankly. “But Woobin will be remaining with me for the duration of this meeting.”
“Ms. Y/L/N, really, Woobin will be fine with Juny—”
“Mr. Qian, I’m failing to see how this is any of your concern.”
“Because you’re treating my kid like he’s a felon.”
“Well yours treated mine like a chew toy so excuse me for exercising some caution,” you finally snapped, tightening your grip around your son and cradling the back of his head.
Mr. Qian’s jaw dropped, and Mrs. Chen cut in before he could say anything else.
“Let’s all sit down and try to have a more productive discussion.” The words were phrased like a suggestion, but the stern tone she said them in very much let you know that they weren’t. “Ms. Y/L/N, Woobin can of course be wherever you are most comfortable having him.”
You nodded to her curtly, taking a seat at the table. With Woobin more awake, you turned him in your lap to face the table, and set up a couple toys and small games on the tabletop to keep him occupied. The teachers took a seat beside each other, leaving you and Mr. Qian sitting caddy-corner.
“First, I want to know what happened,” you demanded, entirely focused on the two teachers.
Ms. Xu took over the explaining, “The class had earned free play yesterday after finishing their curriculum work early. After, we were doing our end of the day clean-up activities, which all of the students help with. Junyi and Woobin were assigned to pick up toys this week. It seems there was a disagreement about who was going to be putting away a specific toy, a whale. Woobin was bit.”
You clenched your jaw at that passive phrasing again. “And where were you two when this was going on?”
“Mrs. Chen was assisting the students who were cleaning the snack tables on the other side of the room. I was the one overseeing the students tidying that side of the room.”
“What do you mean when you say disagreement? I’m trying to understand how it was allowed to escalate into biting.”
Mr. Qian finally spoke up again, “Ms. Y/L/N, Junyi has never done anything like this before, I honestly don’t know where this came from. He’s not a mean kid.”
“Mr. Qian, that is not what I said nor asked,” you turned to him coolly. “I want to know what exactly she was seeing and how much time she had to intervene.”
Ms. Xu recalled, “The two of them were getting along fine. Junyi did seem to be getting a little frustrated, and Woobin was beginning to tear up, but there was no contact at that point, and we know how Woobin is.”
She glanced at the boy on your lap with a sympathetic look, and it took everything in you to hold back your revulsion at her. Yes, your son was quicker to cry than others, but that didn’t mean that as the adult, she shouldn’t investigate what exactly was making him cry.
“I was keeping an eye on the situation to see if they would resolve it on their own,” she tried to reassure you. “If I had thought that it would escalate like that at all, I promise I would have intervened. The contact was entirely unexpected and very sudden.”
“The biting.” You clarified flatly.
“Well, yes,” she nodded. “As soon as I saw it happen, both Mrs. Chen and I went over and separated the two. It was no more than a second or two at most, Ms. Y/N.”
“It sounds like you two did the best you could’ve,” Mr. Qian told the teachers before turning to you once more. “Ms. Y/L/N, again, I am so sorry that Junyi did this, but it sounds like it really did come out of nowhere.”
You pinched the bridge of your nose, inhaling deeply to recenter yourself. Entirely ignoring Mr. Qian’s platitudes, you looked at the teacher, “It took you just a second or two to separate them?”
“Yes,” she confirmed.
“Binnie, may I?” You murmured to your son, reaching for the sleeve of his shirt.
“Okay, Mommy,” he easily let go of his toy for you.
Rolling up the longsleeve of his shirt you turned him a little to show off the deep black, blue, and purple bruise in the perfect shape of a set of little teeth to the other three adults sitting around the table with you. Ms. Xu audibly gasped, Mrs. Chen covered her mouth and looked away, and Mr. Qian had the most visceral reaction, grimacing with his whole upper body as if he’d been slapped.
“I simply find it hard to believe that it was only a mere one or two seconds when my son’s arm looks like this now,” you stated, making firm eye contact with both teachers. “So, I will ask again: How long did it take you to separate them?”
Mrs. Chen and Ms. Xu exchanged uncomfortable looks before the older woman took over speaking.
“Ms. Y/N, I’m not sure if you’ve had experience with removing a child that’s bitten onto another and won’t let go, but you can’t simply rip them apart without causing further damage to the other child’s skin. Ms. Xu couldn’t separate them on her own, she had to wait for me to get there, and as we’ve already said, I was on the other side of the classroom. So yes, it did take longer than we would have liked to separate the two.”
“So it took longer than two seconds, which is what you just told me, twice. You have lied to me twice now about how my child got injured in your classroom.” You rolled Woobin’s sleeve back down, absentmindedly patting his head. Leaning forward as much as you could with him there, you jutted your pointer finger decidedly into the tabletop outside of his toys, “So now I want to know what you and the school are going to do to ensure my son’s safety in your classroom.”
The father beside you suddenly jolted into action at your words, “Ms. Y/L/N, Junyi won’t—”
You rounded on him incredulously, doing your best to both be firm while not absolutely losing it on him, “Mr. Qian, I have already told you that I am not here to concern myself with how you parent your child. And I think the fact that you take my concern for my own child’s wellbeing as an affront to your relationship with yours says more than I would ever think is appropriate for me to.”
Okay, maybe you lost it on him a little.
With him sufficiently dumbfounded, you were able to focus back on the school staff in front of you, “Now please, can we get back to the topic at hand? I want to know what you two plan on doing about classroom management and observing the children under your care to prevent future incidents like this from happening. And I want it written down in a formal document, with assurances from your superiors about how both that and your staff training on communication with parents will be handled, because it certainly can’t include lying to them.”
Ms. Xu looked down at her lap guiltily, while Mrs. Chen simply looked disgruntled. You held the older woman’s gaze steadily, having a distinct feeling that little lie you’d been told was her doing, and the junior teacher was following her own superior’s lead.
“Of course, Ms. Y/N. I will call the principal right now to aid in drawing up the document you’ve requested,” Mrs. Chen acquiesced, standing up and moving over to one of the desks, picking up the landline phone sitting there.
You nodded to her, finally letting your eyes drop down to your kid in your lap. You were unable to fight off the smile that spread across your lips as you looked at your son, picking up one of his hands and bringing it up to your mouth to kiss his little fingers.
“My turn Mommy!” He squealed, grabbing one of your fingers and giving it a comically loud smooch.
You could feel Mr. Qian’s gobsmacked stare on you still, but ignored him. You’d done what you came here to do, none of which involved making nice with the biter’s parents. While what you’d said about not wanting to comment on his parenting was true, that didn’t mean that you hadn’t formed a silent opinion or two about it, especially with how defensive he was. Needless to say, with how he’d attempted to handle this, you didn’t really think very highly of Mr. Qian.
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After leaving the mediation with your own copy of the formal plan on how the three-year-old classroom’s management and safety procedures were going to be tweaked—with specific policies about biting and inter-student de-escalation—and a form that you and Mr. Qian had signed attesting that you participated in and were satisfied with the mediation process, you paused in the lobby of the school. You were juggling too many things: the papers, some of Woobin’s toys, Woobin, your purse, all while trying to get your car keys.
“Hey, you need some help?”
You turned to Mr. Qian with a strained smile, “No, thank you, we’re okay.”
Considering the conversation over, you went to set Woobin down on the ground, “Here, Binnie, wait right here next to Mommy.”
“Oh, glad to see his legs do work.” The man was apparently still there.
“Yes, they do.” You pressed your lips into a flat line, not very amused. “And I don’t appreciate the passive-aggressive comment on my parenting, Mr. Qian.”
“I didn’t mean—”
“Your joke was referencing the fact that the entire time you’ve seen Woobin and me this afternoon, I’ve been either carrying him or holding him in my lap, despite the fact that he can stand on his own. You’ve been letting your son walk on his own all afternoon and haven’t picked him up once. Thus, implying that I’m coddling my son and raising him to be dependent on me, while you’re raising yours to be independent.” You tossed Woobin’s toys into your purse, then folded the papers in half to tuck in as well. “Trust me, I’ve dealt with lots of people thinking they can give me unwarranted advice on parenting. Especially men who think I’m going to give him one too many hugs and he’ll develop an Oedipus complex. They also presumably think that my uterus is roaming around my body causing me to become hysterical while I’m telling them off, too.”
Having finally fished your car keys out from the bottom of your purse, you hoisted Woobin back up into your arms, defiantly making eye contact with the father, “Goodbye, Mr. Qian.”
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A couple weeks of uneventfully picking up Woobin from preschool passed by. You saw Mr. Qian in the lobby, or passed by him in the classroom, of course. But you made no moves to talk to or even acknowledge him, nor he you. Ms. Xu seemed genuinely apologetic about what happened, doing everything possible to ingratiate herself to you at every opportunity, chatting you up at pick-up, asking about your day at work, or telling you about how well Woobin did at curriculum or art or such during the day. Mrs. Chen was cordial, and did your requested weekly check-ins on how the implementation of the new procedures were coming along. You sincerely engaged with and thanked her after each update. After all, you wanted your relationship with your son’s teachers to be productive, not adversarial. As long as they were done lying to you.
Today when you went to pick up Woobin, he was contently sitting in his chair at a table, swinging his feet under him. You squatted down beside him, mussing up his hair a bit, “Hey, Binnie. Have a good day?”
“Yes,” he nodded, reaching out towards you, and you grabbed his hand. “Missed Mommy.”
“And I missed Binnie!” You replied, squeezing his little tummy, delighting in the bright little giggle he let out. “Now come on, bubbles, let’s go home.”
“Oh, Ms. Y/N!” Ms. Xu was suddenly at your side before you could stand up.
“Ah, hello, Ms. Xu, how are you?”
“I’m very excited, actually. But first, Woobin had a fantastic day at school today. He went down so easy for naptime, and he finished the curriculum so fast that we brought out a 4-year-old worksheet for him just to see, and he did that one too! It was some counting, and he did great!”
You turned to your son with a grin, “Did you have fun doing all that counting, Binnie?”
He nodded enthusiastically.
“And are you proud of yourself, bubbles?”
“Yes, Mommy. Can I have a high five?”
“You can have two high fives,” you held out both your palms for him to smack his little hands into.
Turning back to the teacher, you indulged her in the question she very clearly wanted you to ask, “And why are you so excited, Ms. Xu?”
She handed you the piece of paper in her hands, “Well, the Fall Festival is coming up. The entire campus pitches in to put it on, and this year the preschool is running the Bake Sale table. We’re asking parents to volunteer to either bring treats, set up, break down, or do a shift running the table. If you’re able.”
It looked like you were the first parent Ms. Xu had given the sign-up sheet to, all the slots were empty. Eight slots to bring different baked goods, and two slots for each hour-long shift. While you weren’t exactly feeling charitable to the school—Woobin’s bruise still hadn’t fully healed—you noticed the text at the top of the sign-up sheet advertising that any parent who volunteered would get two free ride tickets. Woobin hadn’t gone on his first Ferris Wheel yet, and that was a memory you were looking forward to making with him.
“The ride tickets—” You tapped that part of the paper to draw Ms. Xu’s attention to it. “Will there be a Ferris Wheel?”
Her face immediately lit up and she nodded fervently, “Yes! And Woobin should be just big enough as long as he sits in your lap.”
Well, you could kill an hour running a Bake Sale table with another random preschooler’s parent then take Woobin on the Ferris Wheel. You quickly scribbled down your name for the first hour after the set-up shift, then handed the paper back to Ms. Xu.
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The day of the Fall Festival was upon you, and you were holding Woobin’s hand as you walked across the expansive campus grounds. The booth where the preschool’s Bake Sale was set up was near the other food and carnival games towards the front of the grassy clearing, and you could see the Ferris Wheel at the very back. You were about fifteen minutes early, and most vendors were still finishing setting up. Since you were doing the first shift, you wanted to make sure you weren’t late, as well as see if there was anything from set up that you could help with if needed.
The Bake Sale booth was easy to find, and you saw two men there carrying in large tubs filled with containers of various baked goods.
“Good morning!” You greeted them brightly. “Are you the set-up crew?”
“Johnny Suh,” the taller of the two gestured to himself, then to his companion, “Jeong Jaehyun.”
“Nice to meet you two, I’m Y/L/N Y/N, and this is Woobin. I’m on the first shift. Your kids are in the three-year-old class as well, right?”
“Yes, Sungchan,” Mr. Jeong confirmed with a smile. “I think I’ve seen you around the classroom at drop off and pick up before.”
“And Mark is my boy,” Mr. Suh nodded, then looked around the property. “Well, these are the last of it. Now, he should be around here somewhere…”
You followed Mr. Suh’s gaze, and your stomach dropped as you recognized two familiar figures approaching the table from the direction of the school. Qian Kun was holding a metal box in one hand, and his son’s hand with the other. He set the metal box down on the table.
“Sorry, had to get the money box from Mrs. Chen in the classroom,” he explained, then looked to the two men with you. “Thank you, Mr. Suh, Mr. Jeong. Ms. Y/L/N and I have got it from here.”
“Alright, we’ll see you at the end for break-down, then,” Mr. Suh slapped Mr. Qian’s shoulder in a friendly gesture.
“Goodbye, Ms. Y/L/N, Mr. Qian. You too, Woobin and Junyi!” Mr. Jeong gave waves to all four of you before taking off after the other man who was already several long strides away from the table. “Hey, Johnny!”
Two pop-up chairs were set up behind the table, and Mr. Qian grabbed a bag that was beside one, unfurling a playmat from the inside and laying it down on the ground beside the table. He poured out a bunch of toys too, then squatted down beside his son.
“Alright, Junyi, I need you to look at me. Daddy needs you to play on this blanket today, okay? If you need to go off the blanket, you have to tell Daddy first. It’s so we can stay safe. You cannot leave the blanket without telling Daddy. All your favorite toys are there, you’re going to play with them and have fun. I’ve got snacks and stuff, too. But you need to stay on it. Do you understand, Junyi?”
“Yes, Daddy.”
“Okay, can you please tell me what you’re going to do then?”
“I’m going to play on the blanket.”
“And what if you want to leave?”
“I ask Daddy.”
“Why?”
Junyi’s face screwed into a pout as he tried to remember. “I forgot, ‘m sorry…”
“That’s okay, buddy. It’s so we can be safe,” Mr. Qian repeated it for him. “Now, why are we going to stay on the blanket?”
“So we can be safe.”
“Good, buddy,” He ruffled his son’s hair. “Now go play, I’ll be right here at this table.”
The man stood up straight again, his eyes flicking over you briefly as he began organizing the sweets on the table.
“Good morning, Ms. Y/L/N. Woobin is welcome to play on the mat with Junyi during the shift, if you’re comfortable with that, of course.”
“Oh, thank you.” You led Woobin over to the mat as well. “Binnie, Mommy is going to be working for a while at this table. Your job is to stay on the playmat with Junyi, so that you two can stay safe, okay? You cannot leave the playmat without Mommy.”
“Okay, Mommy.”
“So tell me, what are you going to do?”
“Play with Junyi.”
“Where?”
“On the playmat.”
“Can you show Mommy what all the playmat is?”
He pointed to the edges of the yellow and blue blanket for you.
“And are you going to leave it without Mommy?”
“No.”
“Why?”
“So I can be safe.”
You grinned at him, “Thank you, bubbles. Go play, baby. Call for Mommy if you need me, okay?”
“Okay.”
After depositing a few more toys that you had brought along for Woobin on the mat, you returned to where Mr. Qian was setting out the food.
“Here,” he held a tray of brownies out to you. “These will go there, right in front of you.”
“Oh, got it.” You set them down exactly where he gestured. “So, you signed up for set up and the first shift?”
“I’m actually helping to run the Bake Sale, so I’m setting up, breaking down, and filling in for whichever slots nobody signed up for.”
“Wait, did you bake these, too?”
“Only the ones in containers with the green lids. Other parents contributed too.”
You looked over the baked goods he had indicated. All the ones in the green containers looked the best, you had considered in the back of your mind that one of the richer parents might have just bought them from a bakery and brought them in instead of baking themselves.
Sneaking a glance at the man beside you, you then panicked when you realized that he was already looking at you, expectantly holding out a plate of frosted sugar cookies.
“Here, next to the brownies.”
“Right, on it.”
Mr. Qian cleared his throat, “I am surprised, Ms. Y/L/N… that you’re allowing Woobin to play with Junyi.”
“I’ve also allowed him back at school for the past month, Mr. Qian.” You pointed out. “As I said, my issue has never been with Junyi, but with how the school handled the entire situation.”
“Hm.”
You let out a short sigh, “Though, I am sorry for some of the things I said at that meeting, they were out of line.”
“Some? May I inquire about which ones?”
“The chew toy thing…”
“Oh, yes.”
“And the whole ‘my concern over my child’s safety not being an affront to your relationship with yours.’ That was seriously… awful of me. Just so pretentious,” you breathed out, feeling ashamed as you relived your words. But if you were to ever expect to teach your son humility and owning up to his mistakes, you had to practice it yourself. “I said I wasn’t there to comment on your parenting and then I did exactly that in the exact same breath. I’m sorry, Mr. Qian, and I hope you can believe me when I say that.”
He held your gaze steadily, “I forgive you, Ms. Y/L/N.”
“Everything else I said, though, I stand by,” you reaffirmed pointedly.
“I understand,” he nodded.
You were pretty sure the festival had officially opened, as families had begun filtering in. Some were slowing down as they passed by your table to skim their eyes over your offerings, but none had stopped so far. So you were still just stuck there with Qian Kun and the overwhelming silence that felt like it was damn near suffocating you.
“So, what do you do for a living?” You finally decided to ask. If you weren’t going to be holding a grudge against the guy, you might as well make small talk.
“I’m in sales.”
Okay, small talk was not his forte. This was going to be like pulling teeth.
“Well it seems like they put the Bake Sale table in good hands, then.”
“What about you?” At least he understood reciprocity.
“Publishing.” Yeah, you weren’t any better than him. You stumbled to add on more information, “Uh, I’m a copy editor.”
“Is that like a proof reader?”
“Pretty much, yeah.”
And at that moment, your blessed first customers walked up to your booth, a group of high school students, and you leapt at the opportunity to get out of that awkward conversation.
When your hour shift was finally over, you gleefully picked Woobin and his toys up from the playmat, took your two free ride tickets from Mr. Qian, and waved goodbye to him and the new volunteer parent who had shown up to take over your slot.
“Alright, Binnie, the Fall Festival is our oyster,” you looked it over with shining eyes. “What should we do first?”
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Two hours later, and you were just finishing up your slightly late lunch. You scrolled through the delightful pictures that you’d taken of you and Woobin on the Ferris Wheel, sending a couple to your parents before tucking your phone away.
“Dessert sounds good, don’t you think?” You suggested to Woobin, and the Bake Sale popped into your mind. Those desserts that Mr. Qian made had looked really good, and you weren’t able to try any when you were working the table this morning…
“Please, Mommy?”
“You didn’t even need to ask, bubbles, Mommy wants some dessert too,” you admitted, taking his hand in yours. “I think we should go get some of those sweets that Junyi’s dad made. How does that sound? Did you see them earlier?”
There was a short line that you bumped up against at the Bake Sale table, just a couple families ahead of you. When you finally got to the front, your greeting to Mr. Qian stopped in your throat as you took in the empty spot beside him.
“Are you all by yourself, Mr. Qian?” You craned your neck to look around for signs of another parent.
He let out a tired sigh very clearly from deep within, eyes conveying a harrowed, ominous kind of exhaustion, “It seems as though the parent who signed up for the last four slots has skipped out on me. Been by myself for the past thirty minutes or so. I gave up on him about fifteen minutes ago.”
With a resolute nod, you hoisted your son up onto your hip and slid around to the other side of the table to stand beside Mr. Qian, “Binnie and I will finish the day out with you two then.”
“No, Ms. Y/L/N, you really don’t have to. I’m sure you have things to do, and I can run a preschool Bake Sale by myself.”
“Junyi! Come play with Woobin over here please!” You called after the little boy that you’d spotted toddling a little too far away from the playmat for comfort.
The man whipped around as his son came waddling back over at the sound of his name, clearly unaware that he had just wandered off. He squatted down to chastise the boy, reminding him to stay on the blanket. Junyi nodded, plopping down with his toys.
“I’m not leaving you out to dry, Kun,” you told the father frankly, sitting Woobin and his toys back down on the playmat too.
He gave you a frazzled smile, “Thanks, Y/N.”
Another couple hours passed by of you and Kun jointly running the Bake Sale table. Word had apparently spread since the first hour that you’d done with him in the morning, and the treats were extremely popular. Your line was never empty for more than a minute or two, and often times wrapped past other booths. Now you could see why Kun was so out of it when you had gotten there, he had been doing this by himself, even for just thirty minutes, with Junyi there.
The two of you fell into a symbiotic rhythm of taking orders, payment, handing out food, and keeping an eye on the two boys with you.
In a rare, brief lull between customers, you were caught off-guard when it was also quiet behind you. The telltale giggles, babbling, and nonsense conversation of Woobin and Junyi had faded out. You frowned thoughtfully as you finished rearranging the brownies in front of you, about to turn around to investigate anyway when a heart-wrenching wail pierced the still air. Immediately, you went to jerk around to comfort your crying Woobin, but were stopped in your tracks, so caught off-guard to see that it wasn’t your son sobbing. He was standing in front of Junyi, who was sat on the playmat, half-crying and half-screaming his head off.
Kun couldn’t get the cash in his hand into the register fast enough, and you rushed over to try to get Woobin to at least back up. Crowding Junyi definitely wasn’t going to help.
But you stopped as you realized that Woobin was talking to the other boy.
“Junyi, scary or boo-boo?” Woobin quietly asked him. After he didn’t get a reply, he asked again, “Scary or boo-boo?”
Junyi managed to blubber out, “Scary!”
Kun had finally arrived on the playmat while you watched on with wide, bewildered, and awestruck eyes as Woobin gave Junyi a big hug. The dad looked even more confused than you.
“What’s going on?”
You held up a finger for him to wait a moment, then turned to your son, “Binnie, do you know what happened to Junyi? Why is he having a scary cry?”
“Junyi fell down, Mommy,” he answered you dutifully.
“Okay, thank you,” you nodded to him. Looking at Kun, you explained, “Seems like Junyi just fell down. I don’t think he’s hurt, it just gave him a scare.”
“Daddy!” Junyi whimpered, and Kun gently extracted him from the other toddler’s arms to bring him into his own. Cradling his son, Kun murmured soft reassurances to him as the boy clung to his neck.
“Uh, thank you, Woobin,” he nodded to your son. “I’ve got Junyi from here.”
“You’re welcome,” Woobin replied, but you could see the moistness gathering in his eyes too. Oh, your big-hearted kid.
Both you and Kun brought your respective kids back to the table with you, sitting in the pop-up chairs with them in your laps. The two of you were quiet until Junyi’s sobs had simmered down into little hiccups, and you could feel that Woobin’s breathing had evened out into a nap.
“Okay, how did you do that?” Kun whispered at you.
“Do what?” You replied just as quietly.
“Get Woobin to do what he just did.”
“By asking him the exact same question pretty much every single time he’s cried for the past three years,” you answered honestly. “And he didn’t use to even answer me, much less ask other people that. That’s the first time he’s ever done that, actually.”
“Huh…”
Mr. Suh and Mr. Jeong came back an hour and a half later to help break down the table. It had been a pretty successful endeavor, if you did say so yourself, as there were only a handful of treats left, which you and Kun offered to a group of high schoolers who came by after break-down.
With everything packed up except the cash drawer, Kun turned to you with finality, “I’ve just got to drop this off with the front office and that’ll be it. Thanks, Y/N. You and Woobin were a big help today.”
“Of course. Sorry about that parent who skipped out on you. Who was it, anyway?”
“A… Mr. Nakamoto?” Kun read off the paper. “I’ve never heard of him.”
“I think I’ve chatted with him in the lobby a couple times. His son’s in the two-year-old class if I remember correctly?” You strained your memory, then gave up. “Oh, whatever. Maybe he just had an emergency or something.”
“That’s one way to look at it.”
“Anyway, have a goodnight, Kun, Junyi,” you nodded to the two of them, then squeezed your son’s hand. “Binnie, we’re leaving, do you want to say something to Junyi and Mr. Qian?”
Your son perked up, giving the two of them a bright smile and big wave, “Goodbye!”
“Junyi?” Kun prompted his son from where he was tucked into the father’s chest. “Tell Ms. Y/L/N and Woobin goodbye, you won’t see Woobin until Monday.”
“Bye, Woobin. Bye… Ms. Y/L/N.” Junyi said in between yawns, rubbing at his eyes. Poor guy seemed absolutely tuckered out.
“Goodnight,” Kun gave you one last nod before heading towards the school, and you and Woobin took off towards your car.
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Monday morning you released Woobin’s hand to let him scamper into his classroom, giving Ms. Xu a wave of acknowledgement as you signed the morning drop-off sheet by the door. You were about to take off for work when a hand grabbed your elbow, and you hadn’t even realized that Ms. Xu had approached you, all too focused on heading to work.
“Ms. Y/N!”
“Ah, Ms. Xu, good morning,” you greeted her. “Is something the matter?”
“No, I just wanted to thank you for pitching in with the Bake Sale on Saturday. Mr. Qian informed us that he wouldn’t have been able to pull it off without your help.”
You looked around for Kun. You were only able to spot Junyi, however, coloring with Woobin at a table. Seems like he’d already come and gone. Great, now you had a reputation for being a helpful mom.
You shook off both her hand and her praise, “Oh, really Mr. Qian is exaggerating. He works in sales, did you know? Honestly didn’t need my help.”
“Well, whatever you two did, it was our most successful Bake Sale—well, any kind of fundraising event—for the preschool ever! And, we were wondering if the two of you would consider getting more involved in some parent leadership positions at the school? The preschool PTA have been trying to get a fundraising committee off the ground, and we really think that you two would do a fantastic job spearheading—”
You must have had some kind of look on your face, as Ms. Xu suddenly stopped dead in the middle of her sentence, entirely switching trains of thought. Keeping her same peppy tone and bright, hopeful smile, she said, “I am so sorry to have thrown so much at you. You must have to be getting to work. Why don’t we talk about it later when you come pick Woobin up? All of us, Mr. Qian, too. Goodbye, Ms. Y/N!”
And with that you were ushered out of the door, utterly dumbfounded at what had just happened.
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That afternoon, you squared your shoulders and steeled your nerves as you approached the preschool doors. You had to keep your resolution firm: you were absolutely not going to be joining any sort of PTA, fundraising committee, or parent leadership position. The only thing that you were going to be spearheading was cracking open the bottle of wine that was waiting for you at your apartment tonight.
You were a little earlier than you usually were for pick-up, which you had done on purpose, needing to clear the air with a certain Mr. Qian Kun. Immediately homing in on the man, you made a beeline for him. He noticed you, his friendly hand falling as he seemed to notice the set of your brow.
“Good afternoon, Y—”
“Qian Kun,” you cut him off sternly. “Do you care to tell me why I was voluntold for a position spearheading a fundraising committee this morning?”
“Oh, that. Look, it came as a surprise to me too,” he tried to assuage you.
“Why the hell did my name even come out of your mouth in such a discussion in the first place?”
“Because they were praising me on how well the Bake Sale went, and I was making sure you got the credit that you deserved too. Are you upset about that? If so, I’m sorry? I guess?”
“You listen to the words coming out of my mouth: I will be a PTA mom over your dead body,” you hissed, scooching in to take the spot on the bench beside him and free up more standing space for the parents coming in.
“Okay, let’s take a step back from the threats, maybe, Y/N,” Kun suggested, holding his hands up in both a defensive and ‘are you kidding me?’ gesture. “What’s so awful about being a PTA parent in the first place?”
“Free labor for so little reward, and I don’t have the time for that. Do you?”
“We haven’t even heard their proposal; we don’t know what they’d be wanting us to do.”
“‘Spearheading a committee’ sounds like a part-time job at least.”
“Alright, well, didn’t Ms. Xu tell you that you and I held the most successful fundraising event the preschool’s ever had? And that wasn’t even with us making a concerted effort, either, that was just some random mid-grade effort Bake Sale. Imagine what we could do if we really go for it.”
“You work in sales, huh?” You deadpanned after his little pitch was finished. The one-year-old class opened for dismissal, and you leaned in towards him to continue your fervent conversation in a more hushed voice, “And can’t even realize when you’re the one being sold to! You do know that this campus has a bunch of filthy rich donors, right? They’re not hard pressed for cash, they just give the high school priority, then the middle school, primary, and the preschool gets the leftovers—if there’s even any—forcing it to have to fundraise for itself.”
“Isn’t that all the more reason to do this, then?” Kun pushed back.
“We could do a hundred Bake Sales and it wouldn’t make up the difference between the scraps the preschool gets and the millions that the high school does. No, it would be all the more reason for us to go find our own filthy rich donor who would put a stipulation on their donation for it to be used exclusively for the preschool.”
“Oh.”
“You’ve got to think bigger about this, Kun,” you knocked on his forehead with two of your knuckles as best you could in the narrow space between the two of you. “God. You said you work in sales, what do you even do?”
He rubbed at the back of his neck sheepishly, red tinging the tips of his ears, “Would you believe me if I said I’m a Director of Sales?”
“No,” you snorted.
“That’s fair.”
“So anyway, glad we’re on the same page about saying no to this.” You went to lean away from him and put some pep back into your tone, watching as the two-year-old class was dismissed next.
“What? I—” he looked around, it was only the three-year-old parents left in the lobby now. You sighed, scooting back over to sit shoulder-to-shoulder again for him to be able to continue in a hushed voice, “I thought we were going to find a donor for the preschool.”
“You want us to go in there, and say yes to leading the preschool PTA’s fundraising committee on the condition that its sole mission is to stage a coup within the financial hierarchy of the campus?”
“Okay well when you say it like that—”
“I’m in.” You grinned at him. “As long as you were being serious about the Director of Sales thing.”
“I was,” he fished out a business card from his wallet to hand to you.
Qian Kun, Director of Sales, WeiShen, Inc.
And below that was his email, office phone line, and fax number. You gave it back to him.
“Perfect. Those connections will come in handy.”
The door to the three-year-old classroom swung open just then, and you got to your feet.
“Alright, Mr. Qian, ready to go start the cutest coup the world has ever seen?” You offered your hand to him.
He stood up alongside you, giving your hand a firm shake, “Yes, absolutely, Ms. Y/L/N. They’ll never know what hit them.”
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While Mrs. Chen and Ms. Xu were definitely caught off-guard by your idea, after getting over their initial shock, they were surprisingly on-board with it. They requested that you two bring in a more formal proposal to the next preschool PTA meeting— next Wednesday. That gave you nine days.
“So how did you know all that, about the donors and distribution structure of the funds?” Kun asked as you walked out into the empty preschool lobby.
“I did my research before picking a preschool for Woobin. It’s all there on the Internet if you dig deep enough, and are somewhat adept at reading through the legal bull—” You cut yourself off, looking down at the two toddlers with you. Kun pushed the front door open for you, and you quietly thanked him as you led Woobin through it before resuming your train of thought, “It’s obviously not in any of the advertising stuff for prospective parents, but for prospective donors, investors; the corporate materials.”
The four of you stopped in front of the building, where the small parking lot was.
“So then why did you enroll him here, even knowing about how they treat the preschool with the donations?”
“The high school is the best in the area, and the easiest way to guarantee admission is to graduate in from their middle school. Easiest way to get into the middle school is to graduate in from the primary school.”
“And the easiest way into the primary school is through the preschool,” the dad surmised.
“Bingo. I’m keeping Binnie’s options open,” you squeezed your son’s hand affectionately. “He doesn’t have to go there, but I’m making sure he can if he wants.”
Kun’s eyebrows shot up, “Wow. That’s some really forward thinking.”
You tilted your head curiously, “So why’d you choose to send Junyi here?”
“It was the closest to my place.”
“Practical, that’s more than fair.”
“Speaking of, Junyi and I should get going, we have to pick up a couple things from the store for dinner tonight and buddy already looks like he’s not going to last the two block walk there.” He looked down at his son, who was very quiet, glassy eyes fixed on his feet.
You nodded in understanding, “Of course, Binnie and I have a wine night planned.”
“I’m sorry, a what?”
“Oh, Binnie gets grape juice and I have red wine in matching cups. He likes to feel included.”
“Does he get a matching kiddie charcuterie board too?” Kun chuckled to himself as he hoisted Junyi up onto his hip.
“No, he just takes what he wants off of mine.”
He gave you a blank stare, “I can’t tell if you’re pulling my leg or not.”
“Look, he insists on trying whatever I have, and he ends up liking a lot of it,” you shrugged. “He’s the only 3-year-old I know who asks for tapenade as a snack.”
“You’re being serious?” He checked again.
“Yes,” you laughed. Then, before you knew it, the next words coming out of your mouth were, “You know, you and Junyi should join Binnie and I for a charcuterie night. I’ll prepare actual kid-friendly stuff, too, for Junyi.”
Kun’s head jerked back just the slightest, and he blinked a couple times before asking, “Uh, just you and Woobin?”
“Yeah, is— Would that, uh, be a problem?” The offer had felt perfectly normal and natural for you to make in the moment, but his reaction was making you second guess and stammer. You rushed to tack on, “We can— It’ll be for the fundraising committee, you know.”
“Right, right, of course.” His voice was filled with shaky relief.
“Of course,” you echoed, offering a strained smile.
“As long as that’s not a problem for—for you.”
“Why would it be a problem for me? I invited you.”
“I don’t— That sounds great, thank you, Y/N.”
Desperately wanting to get out of the plane crash that you had inadvertently taken this conversation into, you readjusted your purse on your shoulder decidedly, “Of course. Uhm, well, we won’t hold you two up from the store anymore, it looks like Junyi’s about to fall asleep on you right now. We’ll see you tomorrow.”
Kun looked down at Junyi’s head that had been resting against his chest, the boy’s eyes beginning to flutter shut, “Oh, God, there he goes. Bye, Y/N, Woobin!”
And the man was around the corner before Woobin could even lift his little hand to wave.
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“So what’s the big deal, Y/N?”
“Well because I feel stupid now, Sooyoung,” you ranted to your friend over the phone that night as you washed up the dishes from dinner. “It felt like I was maybe finally getting my first like, parent friend, you know? And then he got all weird as soon as I invited him to hang out. I wasn’t being weird, was I? It was practically a playdate invite!”
Woobin had been put to bed a few minutes ago, and you were recounting the horrible nosedive that your conversation with Kun had taken, needing to know that you weren’t crazy.
“Y/N…” Sooyoung’s voice was patient as it came through your speakers. “Now, I can only guess, because I am, as we know, not a parent friend. But��� is he married?”
 “Huh?” The plate in your hand nearly slipped out of your soapy grip.
“Wedding ring, seen one?”
You wracked your brain, trying to remember if you’d ever really looked at Kun’s hands that closely, “Uh, not that I can remember?”
“Okay. You ever met the mom?”
“No, it’s always Kun who picks Junyi up.”
“Has a mom or another parent or partner ever been mentioned at all?”
“Sooyoung, the point,” you requested sternly, having a sneaking suspicion as to what it was.
“I’m just saying, maybe he got all weird because he thought you were flirting.”
“Oh my God,” you sighed and ran a hand through your hair before realizing that it was still soapy. “God damn it!”
“Y/N?”
You grabbed some paper towels to clean the suds off your head, “Yeah, still here, sorry.”
“Anyway… is he cute?”
“SooSoo, I don’t even think I could flirt on purpose at this point,” you chuckled cynically, going back to your chore. “That muscle’s long shriveled up. I just need to time skip to being married with two kids, I think.”
Your friend laughed along with you, “Fair. But, that doesn’t sound like a no. Kinda sounds like avoiding the question, actually.”
“Sooyoung.”
“Ooh, you gonna send me to my room?” She taunted you, and you could hear her pout through the phone. “Put me in time out?”
“You’d like that, you little freak,” you snickered, picking up your next dish.
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That Saturday afternoon you and Woobin had welcomed Kun and Junyi into your apartment with giddy nerves. Woobin was excited, and you were excited for him. This would be pretty much his first playdate with a kid that he wasn’t related to. And you had all the nerves, as this was your first time having a parent friend over, too. Not to mention that Sooyoung’s words were still bouncing around in the back of your head. When Kun held out a bottle of red wine to you with his left hand, you looked extra hard at his fingers— yep, no ring.
“Oh, Kun, you didn’t have to,” you took it from him gladly, ushering the two of them further into your home.
“You’re hosting and making us a charcuterie board. I figured wine was appropriate,” he explained.
“Well, thank you. This is perfect.”
Woobin was right where you’d left him in the living room on his playmat among his toys.
“Binnie,” you said, waiting until he looked up at you before continuing, “Mr. Qian and Junyi are here, so we’re going to eat now, remember?”
He nodded, immediately standing up and beginning to shovel toys off to one side of his mat. You helped him slide the mat to the corner of the room.
“Uh, we’re just going to eat around the coffee table, if that’s alright,” you explained, gesturing to the cleared table in the middle of the living room.
“Yeah, of course,” Kun nodded.
“Great, great. Dining table kind of has a partially built LEGO set on it right now,” you chuckled as you set the wine bottle down. “I’m going to grab everything from the kitchen, be back in a second.”
“Oh, I’ll help.”
“No, that’s okay, I’ve already got a little helper,” you held a hand out expectantly towards your son. Woobin immediately grabbed your hand, looking up at you. You gave Kun a quick smile, “Be back in a sec.”
In the kitchen, you handed Woobin his spill-proof cup, then another for Junyi. You fit two wine glasses by the stems and a corkscrew in one hand, and grabbed the charcuterie board with the other. Gently nudging your toddler ahead of you, the two of you headed back out to the living room, where your guests were waiting.
Kun and Junyi had sat down on one side of the table, and you gently placed the food down in front of them, then one wine glass in front of Kun. You looked to your son, who handed the correct cup to Junyi.
“It’s just water,” you informed the dad. “We have juice too, if he can have it. I never know about allergies and the like so I didn’t want to assume.”
“Juice?” Woobin looked up at you with wide eyes.
“Yours is already grape juice, Binnie,” you informed him with a head pat.
Kun rubbed his son’s back, “Water’s fine for him, he had a juice box this morning. Thanks.”
You and Woobin sat opposite from the father and son, Woobin immediately clambering into your lap. As you went to uncork the wine, Kun looked over the board in front of you all. You had made sure to prepare some kid-friendly options in one corner in addition to your usual refined spread.
“This all looks fantastic, Y/N. Thank you, seriously,” Kun smiled, and you swore that was the first time you’d noticed a deep dimple appear on both of his cheeks.
You poured first for him, then yourself, “Of course. Thank you two for coming over, Woobin and I were both excited to host for someone. Right, Binnie?”
“What, Mommy?” Woobin looked up at you with a scrunched nose.
“‘Host.’” You repeated the unfamiliar word for him, then clarified your question, “Are you excited to have Junyi and Mr. Qian over?”
“Oh! Yes!” He nodded his head so fast you could feel the rest of his little body shake in your lap. “Can I show Junyi my room, Mommy?”
“After you two eat some, okay?”
“Okay!”
“Did you hear that, Junyi? After you eat, you and Woobin can play.” Kun gently prodded his son, then looked up at you apologetically when all the child did was yawn. “Sorry, he just woke up from a nap before coming over.”
“That’s okay,” you giggled, cutting off a piece of cheese and pressing it onto a cracker, then making another serving of the same cheese and cracker. You handed one to Woobin, keeping the other for yourself.
Woobin eagerly took a bite of the cheese and cracker you’d given him, washing it down with his grape juice.
Kun offered a bear-shaped cookie out to Junyi, who shook his head. The dad sighed, and pointed at a banana slice, then blueberry, then cheddar cheese slice that you’d cut into small star shapes. They all got head shakes.
“Are you hungry at all, buddy?”
“Yes!”
“Then what do you want? Ms. Y/L/N made sure to put out all that food just for you. I don’t think you want what Daddy is eating, buddy. It’s grown-up food.”
You chewed on the inside of your cheek, unsure of if you should speak up. It seemed like they both needed help, but you weren’t one to try to interject your own parenting if it wasn’t asked for.
Junyi squirmed in his dad’s arms for a moment before mumbling, “But Woobin’s eating it…”
Meanwhile Woobin had in fact helped himself to a kalamata olive, pre-pitted, happily munching away.
Kun seemed at a loss, rubbing at his brow, and you finally decided to jump in.
“Junyi, you can try some, too,” you told him encouragingly, leaning forward and reaching over the board. “Do you want to try the cheese Woobin was eating or the olive he just had? Or both?”
“Cheese, please.”
You cut off a small piece of the gouda, “Here you go.”
He took it in his small hands, “Thank you!”
“You’re welcome.”
You watched in amusement as Junyi ate the cheese, his features lighting up.
“Did you like it?”
“Yes! Can I try the olive?”
“Hey…” Kun’s voice held a slight warning as he pinched his son’s side.
“Can I try the olive please?”
“Thank you.” The dad patted the boy’s head before reaching around him for the glass of wine on the table.
You handed him an olive, both you and Kun watching with interest as he popped it into his mouth whole. Junyi’s face immediately screwed up in disgust. Without missing a beat, Kun held up a cupped palm with another short sigh, letting his son spit the food back out. Trying to hold back your giggles, you handed the dad a napkin.
“Thanks,” he accepted it, depositing the olive into the paper, and wiping his hand off.
After some more broadening of Junyi’s horizons—to mixed results—the board was mostly clear, and the kids had declared themselves full.
“Can I show Junyi my room now?” Woobin asked excitedly.
“Sure, Binnie. You two can go play,” you nodded, and he immediately scrambled off your lap. You held out a hand for him to use to balance himself as you kept talking, “Mr. Qian and I have some work to do, so we’ll be in here if you need us, okay?”
“Okay!” Both toddlers said in unison.
“Hey, look here,” Kun stopped his son before he could leave the room. The father waited until the boy was looking him in the eye before continuing, “Remember what we talked about before coming over? All week?”
Junyi nodded fervently.
“Good. Go have fun, buddy,” he ruffled his son's hair.
You watched the two of them speedwalk out excitedly, Woobin explaining the house rule of not being allowed to run because it’s not safe as they went.
Then it was just you and Kun. Sooyoung’s words echoed in the back of your mind.
“Alright, let me grab my laptop, then we can get to work,” you declared, getting to your feet.
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A few hours later and the two of you had made good progress, only interrupted by the kids a few times here and there, mostly them wanting to show off toys or coloring pages, or Junyi had wandered in at one point seemingly just to make sure Kun was still there.
You had been adding something to your word document of notes when you realized that your house had been eerily quiet for too long. Fingertips hovering over the keys, you exchanged a suspicious look with Kun.
“Too quiet?” He asked knowingly.
“Yeah…” You frowned, setting your computer aside to get up.
Both of you treaded through your home until you got to Woobin’s bedroom. The door was open, and you were alarmed for a moment when you didn’t see either boy anywhere on the floor playing. Until you recognized two lumps under the covers of his toddler bed, Woobin and Junyi looking like they were going to sleep for the next hundred years or so.
“Oh, god, I am so sorry,” Kun shook his head, seeming about to go in there and grab his son.
You were between him and the room, however, and quickly turned the lights off and shut the door. “It’s okay, Kun. They just tuckered themselves out. That’s good.”
Latching onto his elbow, you pulled him back towards the living room, catching a glance at the time on the microwave as you went through the kitchen.
“Damn, it’s not even Binnie’s normal bedtime yet,” you chuckled.
You didn’t let go of Kun until you had pulled him back down onto the couch, and then held his (second) glass of wine back out to him pointedly. He had a fond smile as he took it from you, and you happily accepted your victory as you picked yours back up too. You left your laptop on the coffee table, shifting to entirely face Kun as you raised your glass to your lips.
Kun took a sip.
You took a sip.
“Do you want to ask me something, Y/N?” Kun scratched the back of his neck.
“Mm, sorry,” you apologized with a chuckle. “I zoned out on your face there, didn’t I?”
“Yeah, a bit,” he laughed.
“I was thinking, though.”
“What about?”
“You’re a Director of Sales…”
“Supposedly.”
“Supposedly,” you repeatedly humorously before moving on with your question. “Do you think we’ve got a good chance at getting a donor for the preschool? If our proposal is approved by the PTA on Wednesday, of course.”
You had expected some kind of business musings, or serious answer from Kun, but instead you watched with concern as his brow furrowed, his fingers drummed along his knee, and he suddenly became fidgety, shifting around in his seat. He stayed quiet, once again scratching at the back of his neck, squinting one eye closed, then the other.
“Kun?” You said his name hesitantly.
“Sorry,” he shot you a familiar, frazzled smile that reminded you of when he was getting overwhelmed at the Bake Sale booth by himself. “I uhm, I don’t know.”
“That’s okay,” you reassured him. “I was just curious, it’s not life or death that you know everything all the time.”
He didn’t even seem to hear you as he stood up, setting his wine glass down on the table. The dad began pacing back and forth in front of your couch, his hands laced together behind his neck.
“I’m good at my job.”
You would’ve sworn he wasn’t talking to you, except his wide, stressed eyes snapped up to you after he said that.
“I’m not your boss. You don’t need to convince me, Kun,” you said slowly.
“I know, just— with all this, it’s stuff that I should be good at, it’s right up my alley. But it’s for Junyi, and I want to be the best dad I can be for him that I just end up jumping into doing things without actually thinking about them first because other people are telling me that’s what I need to do to be a good dad. I know how to be a good Director of Sales. I don’t know how to be a good dad.”
“You don’t need to know everything,” you reiterated strongly, hoping he actually listened this time. “I don’t know all the secrets for being a good mom. I just know how to be Woobin’s mom. You don’t need to know all the secrets to being the best dad ever. The only thing you need to worry about is being Junyi’s dad. Does that seem a bit more manageable?”
Kun’s pacing slowed to a stop in front of you, “Well, I guess.”
“So, the next time somebody is trying to sell you on some ‘Dad Thing,’ stop, breathe, and think: Is this what I, Qian Kun, as Junyi’s dad, need to do, to be?”
“Okay…” he looked at you skeptically, closing his eyes for a moment. You watched as his shoulders rose and fell with a deep breath.
“…Are you doing it right now?”
“Well how else am I supposed to decide if this is a good thing to do or not?”
You let out a hearty laugh, “No, that’s perfect, Kun, go ahead.”
He closed his eyes again, and you watched with fond amusement as his eyebrows quirked up and down with his thoughts. You took another sip of your wine before he had finished, and he opened his eyes once more, giving you a firm nod, “Okay, yes, I think that’s a thing that Junyi would need me to do.”
“Great,” you smiled at him, tilting your wine glass out to him.
He picked his back up and clinked it to yours in a little cheers. You tipped the remainder of your drink back in one go.
“Oh, that was good,” you declared. “Thanks, Kun.”
“Of course, Y/N. Thank you for inviting us.”
“Like I said, Binnie and I were both really excited to host,” you took your empty glass into the kitchen to start cleaning up. “I don’t know if this is bad, but he hasn’t really had a lot of play dates that weren’t like his cousins or something.”
“Junyi neither,” Kun admitted.
“It’s hard, isn’t it?” You asked, starting to stack the plates. “Kid, and work, and family, and friends, and everything else. And then you’re supposed to be in charge of your kid’s social life too?”
You’d turned your back on him to bring the plates into the kitchen, expecting to hear his response to your question, but you were just met with silence. After depositing the dishes in the kitchen, you walked back out to the living room, alarmed to see that Kun had taken to pacing again.
Keeping a calm demeanor yourself, you kept going about your task, grabbing the charcuterie board, the last thing that needed to be tidied up. You had just started back towards the kitchen when Kun broke his silence.
“Junyi’s mother left us.”
You were so glad you had your back to Kun so he couldn’t see your rueful wince. Oh, you were so going to regret this.
Relaxing your features into a more sympathetic frown, you turned around to face him, “I’m very sorry to hear that, Kun.”
This was going to be a lot, you could sense it, so you set the charcuterie board back down on your breakfast bar.
“So just know that however hard it is for you and Woobin’s dad, it’s like ten times harder for me, and that’s why I’m always—”
You had stopped listening to him, however, your brain turning to white noise after the phrase ‘Woobin’s dad.’
“Wait, do you think I’m married?” You blurted out over him.
“Well, no, I can see that you don’t have a ring,” Kun gestured down to your hands. “But a boyfriend or another significant other. I’m doing this solo and—”
“I’m a single parent too!”
“What?” He seemed dumbfounded.
You couldn’t tell if you wanted to laugh or cry more at how ridiculous this was.
“Woobin’s dad was a one-night stand! I can’t remember the guy’s name, or what he looks like. Couldn’t find him if I wanted to. I don’t have a partner now, either. What on Earth made you think I was anything other than a single mom? You’re in my home!” You gestured around wildly to where there were multiple pictures of your family, of you and Woobin, but none of you, Woobin, and any man that could reasonably be considered his father.
“Well you’re just— you’ve got— at the meeting— you’re so put together,” Kun stammered out, his voice getting smaller and smaller. He ran a hand through his hair, “You’re not falling apart at the seams like I am.”
“Kun.” You grabbed him by the shoulders, stopping his frenzied pacing. “Look me in the eye.”
It wasn’t really like he had a choice, you were now holding his face just a couple inches from yours, but he still followed your command.
“Good,” you praised him, keeping your voice soothing. “I want you to take three deep breaths with me.”
He followed along as you inhaled, exhaled, inhaled, exhaled, inhaled, and finally exhaled again together.
“Alright, thank you,” your voice was still sweet and calm as you ran your hands back down to his shoulders. “Now… why the fuck do you think I am more put together than you, Qian Kun?”
“Everything,” he breathed out, hanging his head.
“God, Kun,” you sighed, seizing him by the wrist. “Come on.”
You led him into your dining room, where there was in fact a half-built LEGO set on your dining room table. But that wasn’t your goal. On the bookshelf in there, you grabbed a specific picture frame, and took it and Kun back to the living room.
Sitting down side-by-side with Kun on the couch, you held the picture out in front of the two of you. It was of you and Woobin just over three years ago now, the first night you came home from the hospital. Your mother had taken it. He was swaddled in his baby blue blanket, all chubby cheeks, and you looked dead tired, but an excited sparkle was still in your eyes as you grinned down at your son.
“Look, Kun. I used to feel like that too. All the time. Almost every day when I was pregnant,” you relayed to him.
“But not anymore?” He questioned hesitantly.
“Sometimes. But not like before. Because I realized that I’m not doing this by myself.”
“What do you mean?”
“I may be a single mom, but I’m not alone, I have Binnie. And isn’t that the whole point? To be there for them? To make sure they know they’re not doing it alone either?”
Kun was quiet, his eyes still focused on the picture.
You continued, “I’m lucky enough to have my parents as a good support system, and some friends I can call up in case of emergency too. But I remember when I found out I was going to have Woobin, and I decided to keep him, I was scared of doing it by myself. Terrified, might be a better word.”
“When I came home from the hospital with him, my mom stayed with us for the first couple weeks.” You tapped the frame. “And the first night after she left, when it really was just the two of us, I was expecting this overwhelming sense of loneliness, and instead I just felt… full. I know I had all those birthing hormones in me, oxytocin and whatnot, but I looked down at him and I realized I wasn’t alone, and I wasn’t ever going to be in all this because I have Binnie.”
“I’ve never thought about it like that,” Kun finally spoke again.
Thinking about your cousin’s approach to parenting, you guessed, “You’ve always thought about him as the adversary?”
“Not exactly. Junyi’s more like a tiny roommate that I have to dress and feed and keep from accidentally dying.”
“I’d love to see pizza and beer night at your place.” You joked, laughing when you managed to get a small smile out of Kun again. “Does Junyi get his in a sippy?”
“You jest, but I have poured myself two fingers of whiskey into a Winnie the Pooh sippy cup before because it was the only clean drinking vessel we had.” He rubbed at his temples, then clarified, “With the lid off.”
“Desperate times call for desperate measures.” You patted his back, reaching across him to set the frame down on the side table by another one that was displayed there.
“Thanks, Y/N.” Kun’s eyes followed you as you sat back down, suddenly much closer than you remembered being before. Or were you just more aware of your proximity?
He patted your knee. “Seriously, that made me feel a lot better.”
“Of—” You cleared your throat to get rid of the squeak that was now in your voice. “Of course.”
Your skin tingled. Holy shit, you’d only had two glasses of wine spread across several hours, there was no way you should even be remotely buzzed. Kun was still looking at you. Were his eyes always this dark, this inviting?
God, he really was handsome. You’d always known that, thought that, since the moment you saw him in the lobby of the preschool. But something about now, having him in your home, so close, alone, you felt like you couldn’t take your eyes off of him. He wet his lips seemingly instinctually, and for a moment your brain short-circuited.
“Daddy?” A small voice made both you and Kun jump in your seats. You bit your tongue in surprise, hissing in pain as you and the dad simultaneously scooted away from each other. Junyi was standing at the threshold of the living room, rubbing one of his eyes sleepily.
“Hey, buddy.” Kun waved his son over with a smile. “Is everything okay?”
Junyi walked over, stopping in front of his dad, a small pout on his face. “I woke up and didn’t see you...”
“Oh, buddy,” Kun rubbed the toddler’s back. “Sounds like it’s about time for us to go home, huh?”
You smiled at the both of them, hoping they couldn’t see how frazzled you felt through it. “Of course, it’s late. I think we’re uh, we’re all tired. Junyi, is Woobin awake?”
The boy shook his head no.
“Okay, thank you.” You stood up, grabbing the wine glasses as Kun picked his son up.
You sent them off with a quick goodbye at your front door, and let out a deep sigh of relief once you’d closed it behind them. There weren’t many dishes to take care of in the kitchen, but you still took your time scrubbing at them, then tiptoed down the hall to check in on your son. He was in fact sound asleep, and you quietly went to retire in your own room for the night.
Except once you were in your own bed, sleep didn’t find you easy. You still saw Kun whether your eyes were open or closed, and you could feel the ghost of his warm hand on your skin. You rolled over into the center of the empty expanse of your bed, burying your face in your pillow, and let out a groan. You so needed to get laid. That’s all this was, you had set aside your own needs for your family’s and as soon as you saw one attractive guy, you couldn’t function. There were more important things to focus on with Kun, like the fundraising.
And so you went to sleep with thoughts of spreadsheets, Kun’s dark eyes, numbers, Kun’s warm hands on you, fundraising pitches, and Qian Kun running through your mind.
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The fundraising pitch was a hit. Yours and Kun’s PTA committee was approved at the very same meeting, and you two were made co-directors effective immediately.
Afterwards, you, Kun, Woobin, and Junyi all walked out together, and while Kun seemed to be basking in the exhilaration of success, you were shell-shocked with a harrowing realization.
“Y/N?” Kun gently touched your arm, voice tinged with concern.
You looked up at him, horrified. “I’m a PTA mom now, aren’t I?”
He seemed to be holding back his laughter as he patted your shoulder. “I think you are. My condolences. Please don’t kill me.”
“Unfortunately, I don’t think I can dispose of my co-director so easily now.”
He was grinning at you. “Ah, didn’t realize that title came with such high protections.”
You rolled your eyes, but found your mood lifting anyway. “Yeah, yeah. Anyway, you mentioned that you had something exciting, but only if we got approval?”
“Right!” Kun let go of Junyi’s hand to reach into the interior pocket of his suit jacket. He retrieved a crisp cream envelope, about the size of his hand. His name was embossed on the front of it in gold lettering.
You looked at him with an eyebrow raised. “You got a wedding invite?”
“Close.” He opened the envelope, holding out the contents to you. You set Woobin down, murmuring a quiet request for him to stay by you all so you could take the card in both your hands. The front of the card had an unfamiliar crest on it, and you opened it to read the inside.
‘The United Publishing Society is honored to invite Mr. Qian Kun and a guest to their 89th Annual Benefactor Gala’
And below that was the date, time, location, and dress code. Black tie formal.
“A fancy networking event?” You questioned, handing it back to him.
“No,” he shook his head very seriously. “These are all the old industry bigwigs who want to get together without all that schmoozy networking and ladder-climbing stuff going on. You and I are probably going to be the youngest ones there by a couple decades.”
“Wait you and me?”
“Yep. ‘Mr. Qian Kun and a guest.’” He recited off the invite. “You’re my guest.”
“Uhm...”
“I happen to know that one of the guys attending is also on the board of a non-profit that donates exclusively to children’s causes. Building pediatric cancer centers, juvenile intervention centers, the whole nine. I think he’ll be our best bet for a donor.”
You narrowed your eyes suspiciously. “But you just said they want to get together without networking and all that kind of stuff. Why would we be any different?”
“It’s a charity gala, they’re already there to write checks anyway. We’re not going to be asking him for a job.”
It’s not you were exactly overflowing with any options. “When was that again?”
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“What do we think?” You did a spin for your small audience of Woobin and Sooyoung. “Good enough for black tie formal?”
Tonight was the night of the gala Kun was taking you along to, and you sort of felt like you were going to throw up. And pass out. In that order. First of all, you had never been to a gala, you couldn’t remember if you had ever gone to something with a black tie formal dress code (you literally had to go out and buy this outfit), not to mention that you felt awful for having to ask your friend to babysit. But unfortunately your parents were out of town and all of your normal babysitters were busy. Sooyoung had already let you (jokingly) know that this was under duress, and that you owed her—despite turning down the money you offered her.
Sooyoung wolf-whistled at you, and you gave her a pointed look. Not the example you wanted to set for your son. Woobin looked up from his toys at the sound, and clapped for you.
“You look great, Y/N!” Your friend reassured you, and you were thankful that she reigned her mouth in around your kid. Typically, you would’ve gotten a much more explicit compliment from her. “Should be good for black tie. I mean, it’s not like you have any other option, right?”
“Right...” You groaned, turning back towards your room. “Hold on, let me put the shoes on so you can see those.”
You were sitting on your bed pulling your shoes on when you heard your doorbell ring. Your stomach dropped as you looked over at the time on your bedside clock. Shit, Kun was early. You should’ve anticipated that from the last time he was here.
“Soo! Can you get the door? I’m still putting my shoes on!” You yelled out through the apartment.
“Yep!” She called back.
You could vaguely hear the muffled voices of Sooyoung and Kun—and even Woobin at one point—but you were too focused on tugging your goddamn shoes on to care much about what they were saying. Just as you were finally standing up and straightening out your outfit, Sooyoung speedwalked into your bedroom, Woobin in her arms.
She had a smile filled with devilish delight on her face as she leaned in to whisper conspiratorially to you, “That is Kun?”
“Huh? Yeah? Unless you let some strange man into my home that I don’t know,” you replied, bewildered. “Should I have asked you to ID him?”
“I take back everything I said, you stay out as long as you want tonight. All night even,” she suggested, gesturing wildly with one hand as the other kept your toddler propped up on her hip. She pinched his cheek fondly. “BinBin and I can have a sleepover, right, buddy?”
Your son’s face lit up with delight at the prospect. “Sleepover?!”
Well aware of what your friend was implying, you did your best to regulate your outer emotions and intonation as you addressed your kid. You kept your tone kind but firm, “No, Binnie, I’m sorry.” Focusing your gaze on your friend, you added pointedly, “Nobody’s having a sleepover tonight.”
“Y/N, come on. You’ve never denied yourself the finer things in life since becoming a mom. Why are you insisting on starting now?” Sooyoung sighed.
“If you’ll excuse me, I have a gala to attend. For the fundraising committee I’m on.”
Walking through your apartment, you grabbed your purse from your dining room and finally found Kun in the foyer just a few steps from the front door. He was looking at a photo you had up on the wall, his back to you, so all you could see was his brown hair and dark suit.
“Hi, Kun!” You hoped you didn’t sound out of breath as you entered the room. Judging by the sound of footsteps behind you, Sooyoung had followed you in to see you off for the night.
Kun turned around at his name, hands clasped behind his back. He was dressed rather handsomely for the night in a tux with his hair neatly parted away from his face. But it was the starstruck smile on his face that made your skin warm up as he stopped in his tracks, just looking at you.
“Kun? You good?” You coughed awkwardly, well aware of your spectators.
“Sorry, sorry. Hello, Y/N.” He blinked and shook his head, stepping forward all the way to stand in front of you.
“You’ve already met my friend Sooyoung. She’s watching Woobin tonight for me.” You gestured to the two of them.
“So you two can take as long as you need!” She piped up oh-so-helpfully.
You turned to look at her with wide, pointed eyes.
 “You know, chatting people up for your fundraising, or whatever,” she tacked on innocently.
“Thank you, SooSoo. I’ll see you later.” You pecked your son on the forehead. “Goodnight, Binnie. Remember, Mommy will be back late so Aunt SooSoo is going to put you to bed, and you and me are going to eat breakfast together, okay?”
“But Aunt SooSoo said I was having a sleepover with her?”
“Aunt SooSoo was just joking, baby. I’m sorry, no sleepovers tonight,” you informed him with a heavy heart. Sooyoung set him down, and he toddled off towards the living room. Your friend went to follow him, and you grabbed her elbow to lean in to hiss in her ear, “I hope you’re happy, you owe Binnie a sleepover now.”
“And he’ll get one,” she whispered back. “As soon as you have one of your own.”
You shot her one final glare that she just retaliated with a wink, before letting her go and striding back over to Kun, who was waiting patiently by the front door.
“Everything okay?” He asked, concern on his features.
“Yeah, just making sure she knows Binnie's bedtime and to not give him any more juice.” You offered him a reassuring smile. “All good.”
“Good. You ready, then?”
“As I’ll ever be, I guess.”
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You so were not ready, it turned out. Just a few minutes after arriving, milling around and taking in the grandeur of the ballroom with Kun, you were starting to feel dizzy. Kun had already seen a couple of people that he must have known, flashing them a charismatic smile and exchanging passing greetings. You, meanwhile, felt like a weight was pressing on your chest, and inhaled deeply through your nose to try to calm down.
“Woah, are you okay, Y/N?” Kun leaned in to ask you quietly.
“Yeah, fine,” you lied through your teeth. “Why?”
“You’ve got a death grip on my arm that you didn’t have thirty seconds ago.” He patted your hand that was on his upper arm.
Looking down, you saw that his suit jacket was crumpled in your fingers, and you consciously tried to loosen your grip, but couldn’t make yourself do it. Instead, you just stared at your locked hand.
“I’m a copy editor, Kun, I don’t really go to galas on the daily, so pardon me for being a little out of my element here,” you retorted, the words cutting through the air much harsher than you had intended. Taking another deep inhale and exhale, you added a whispered, “Sorry, sorry.”
“Come on, let’s get some air, hm?”
The gala had an outdoor area devoid of other guests, presumably due to the chilly nighttime air. Kun sat you down on a stone bench outside of the main courtyard area, out of sight from the large windows of the ballroom.
The pressure on your chest was gone, and with you breathing easier, the cynical, nervous thoughts could finally take center stage in your brain.
“God, this isn’t going to work! Why did we even come out here?” You cracked your knuckles anxiously. “How do we even ask for money without just sounding like children? ‘It’s not fair!’”
“If we find the right donor—and don’t use that tone of voice—that argument is actually going to be what resonates with them,” Kun responded calmly, standing in front of you with his hands in the pockets of his slacks. “Someone that cares about the kids, not about investing in an institution or whatever, will be moved by the fact that the preschool is being neglected financially.”
You chewed on the bottom of your lip. “Well damn, when you put it like that, I may just believe that you’re a Director of Sales, Qian Kun.”
“I thought the business card had convinced you.”
“Anybody can order a business card that says whatever they want.”
“That would’ve been extensive planning on my part.”
“Hey, you could’ve had it on hand to pick up women. There’s guys that do that.”
He seemed genuinely put-off and bewildered. “Wait really? That’s… That is just… loser behavior.”
“Though the fax number did point to it being real,” you continued, finally cracking a smile. “Dudes doing pick-up probably think it makes them look dorky.”
“What? People aren’t sexting via fax these days?” Kun joked, a grin tugging at his lips.
You were laughing too hard—and thus trying to quiet down your laughter—to respond to him, giving him the perfect leeway to continue. “What would you even call that? Saxing? Sexing?”
You were dizzy again, but this time it was light-headedness from laughing too hard, quite literally slapping your knee as you tried to calm yourself down.
Kun was chuckling as well, sliding in to sit next to you. “I take offense at the sentiment that fax machines are lame, by the way. I’ll have you know that’s my personal fax line on my business card. Not everyone gets their own.”
Finally having enough wits about you to form sentences again, you sat up straight to look him in the eye as you clarified, “Hey, I was saying that loser dudes who make fake business cards think that fax machines are lame. I think men with fax machines are sexy, especially personal fax lines.”
You went to nudge his shoulder teasingly, caught off-guard as you realized just how close he was to you. Even closer than the night on your couch, his dark eyes settling on your face, unabashedly drinking you in. Your breath hitched in your throat as you were suddenly surrounded by the intoxicating smell of his cologne. The cold air made the hair on your bare arms stand up—or maybe it was something else—and you found yourself pressing forward even closer towards Kun’s warmth.
“Y/N,” he murmured your name quietly. “Are you cold? We can go back inside.”
“No, just…” you took a deep breath, scooting in even closer to him, until you were pressed up side-to-side. “Stay right here? You’re warm.”
He uncertainly wrapped his arm around you. “Sure, sure. Of course.”
“And… Can I ask you something?”
“Anything, yeah.”
“I wasn’t crazy, right? On the couch the other night… Did you want to kiss me, too?”
“You-You wanted to kiss me?”
“I’m uh, a bit rusty at this kind of thing,” you admitted, your skin burning. “But I’m not completely imagining that there’s… something here, right, Kun?”
“You wanted to kiss me?” He repeated like a broken record.
You lightly snapped your fingers in front of his face. “Kun? My question? Or have I officially lost it, and this is like… going to make everything awkward for the fundraising committee?”
“No, no, I-I do—did want to kiss you. I thought I was making you uncomfortable,” he stumbled over his words sheepishly. “I’m uhm… also pretty rusty with this stuff.”
“You do want to kiss me? Or you did want to kiss me, past tense?” You clarified.
“Both! Uhm, I did, that night on the couch, and I still do, now…” He confessed weakly.
“Is there any reason that you shouldn’t? Like, is there somebody…?”
“No, there isn’t. Not at all.” Kun gulped. “What about you?”
“Nope, nobody, and Qian Kun, if you continue to talk about kissing me without actually doing anything, I might actually lose my mind,” you whispered, feeling hot, embarrassed, desperate tears pricking at the edges of your eyes.
“God, sorry.” He cupped your cheek, turning your head and tilting your chin to be able to perfectly slot his lips with yours. The arm that was already wrapped around you just pulled you closer to him, as one of your hands grabbed the lapel of his suit jacket. You let out an embarrassing whimper as soon as his mouth meshed with yours, and he murmured another hushed ‘sorry’ against your lips. If he hadn’t just told you that he was rusty, you wouldn’t have had any idea as your head spun, your heart beat out of your chest wildly like a cartoon, and you were definitely crying tears of relief into what you were seriously considering quite possibly your best kiss ever.
It was your turn to mutter an apology as your tears turned the kiss salty, but as you pulled back to do just that, you saw the glistening of Kun’s eyes in the champagne tinted light filtering out from the ballroom, turning his tears golden as they slipped down his cheeks. Instead, you just pressed your forehead to his in silent understanding, looping your arm around his neck to hold him even closer, if that was possible.
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PART II: you got my heartbeat to play to your time
Spotting Kun in the lobby of the preschool, you immediately lit up and rushed to sit down beside him on one of the benches. He offered you a tired smile and peck on the cheek in greeting, scooting to make room for you.
“Brr, it’s fucking freezing out there,” you shuddered, grabbing his hand to press it against the cold tip of your nose. “That’s just from the 30-second walk from the parking lot to here! Are you two going to survive the walk home? You sure you don’t want me to drive you? Well, I don’t have another carseat for Junyi, but he could sit on your lap in the backseat, I think? Better than freezing to death, right?”
“We’ll be okay, Y/N,” Kun reassured you, patting your leg before resting his hand there. “Thank you though, love.”
The subject of the cold suddenly made you remember something else, and you perked up, “Oh, Woobin and I were at the store yesterday and he needed new gloves, and I saw that bun’s were getting a little worn out when we went out last weekend too—”
“Whose?” Kun asked, furrowing his brows.
“Junyi’s. Look.” You held up the pair that matched Woobin’s, save for the pattern, which had little bunnies on them instead of whales. “Aren’t they adorable? God, I just love their tiny hands. I’ll return them if this is weird and I overstepped a line though. I tried to call you to see if this was okay, but the store was just a dead zone, and I couldn’t get a signal.”
A sheepish smile punctuated the end of your nervous rambling. You and Kun hadn’t been dating for very long, just a few months, and you were still getting a feel for boundaries when it came to your relationship with each other and each other’s kids. You’d just started spending the night at each other’s houses with both kids there—already a big step, in your opinion. Taking the initiative on buying Junyi a new pair of gloves had seemed perfectly natural when the thought came to you, but you didn’t want it to feel like you were rushing things to Kun, or taking a place that wasn’t yours to take—and hadn’t been offered to you—in Junyi’s life.
“Oh, no, Y/N, these are perfect, thank you.” He accepted them, a genuine, grateful smile on his face as he tucked them away in his jacket pocket, then squeezed both of your hands. “Junyi will love them. He did need new gloves; I just hadn’t made it out to the store yet.”
“Then what is making you make that face?”
“Since when has Junyi been a bunny?”
“Were you not intentionally buying him a bunch of bunny-patterned stuff?” You questioned, tilting your head.
“Huh?”
“His backpack, his stuffie that he brings to school, his pajamas that he wore at my place last weekend, and I’ve seen him in like at least three different bunny t-shirts. I thought the theming was intentional.”
Kun took a long, slow blink. “Oh… it was not.”
“Kun… are bunnies your favorite animal?” You teased.
“No! I think…?”
“God, long day at work?” You surmised, stroking the back of his head soothingly.
He leaned into your touch, letting out a disgruntled groan, “Long week. Scratch that, long month.”
“Mm, anything I can do to help?”
“Unless you can clone me, or stop time…”
“Okay, new question: Anything I can do to make you more comfortable? Even just something small?”
“Can you and Woobin come over tonight? I know we weren’t planning on it, but—”
“Yes, Kun, we can come over tonight,” you agreed, using your free hand to grab one of his.
“Thank you,” he sighed, squeezing your hand back.
The door to the boys’ classroom opened then, and you nudged Kun’s shoulder with yours. He nodded, the two of you standing up together. As soon as you stepped foot into the classroom, your shins were knocked into by one small body, then another.
“Oh, hey bun! Hey bubbles!” You greeted the kids, wobbling a bit as they had each latched onto one of your legs.
Kun, who had caught you by the elbow to steady you, was looking at the three of you with that same tired but heartfelt smile, “Guys, am I just chopped liver?”
Junyi squinted up at his dad curiously, “What’s liver?”
“Yeah, what’s liver, Mr. Kun?” Woobin echoed.
“He means he wants a hug too, boys,” you explained. “And he’s been working really hard, so I think he should get a really big one.”
They immediately detached themselves from you to throw their little arms around Kun’s legs instead.
“You should ask for one next time, Mr. Kun!”
“Yeah, Daddy! Instead of talkin’ about liver and stuff.”
“Yeah, Mr. Kun, just ask for one next time,” you repeated teasingly.
Kun looked at the two kids with that same fond, resigned smile. “Right, my bad, boys. I will just ask for one when I need one next time.”
As the kids hug-attacked Kun, you went over to their forgotten cubbies to pick up their respective whale and bunny backpacks, giving Ms. Xu and Mrs. Chen friendly waves of acknowledgement. When you returned, Kun had managed to get a kid under each arm, both toddlers giggling as they were held like sacks of potatoes.
“Are you carrying them out like that?” You asked with a tilted head.
“Maybe,” Kun joked. “It’s a good arm workout.”
“Yeah, for all three of you,” you referred to how the boys were clinging onto his forearms against gravity as well.
“Mm, the idea of buff three-year-olds terrifies me,” he declared, lowering the kids. “Alright, time to let go, guys.”
You reached into Junyi’s backpack to secure the little tiny puffer jacket that was inside, “It’s a bit chilly out, bun-bun, and you and your dad are walking home, so come on, you’re putting your coat on.”
“Okay,” he stuck his arms out for you to help put it on him.
“Oh,” Kun pulled the new pair of gloves out of his own pocket, showing them off to his son. “Look, buddy. Ms. Y/N got you a new pair of gloves.”
“Oh wow, thank you!” He beamed up at you.
“You’re welcome,” you grinned back, kneeling down in front of him to zip up the jacket for him. “Woobin has a pair just like it but with whales, so you two can match next time he wears his.”
Woobin looked down at his bare hands with a thoughtful frown. “Where are my gloves, Mommy?”
“They’re probably in your backpack, baby. You and I are driving home so you don’t have to put them on if you don’t want to, because your hands won’t be getting cold outside like Junyi’s.”
“Oh. I want to put them on, please.”
“Here, I’ll get them,” Kun unzipped the backpack that was on your shoulder and began rooting through it.
“Thank you.” You murmured. As he got the gloves and helped Woobin put them on, you went over the plans for the rest of the night with your son, “We’re going to go home and get a few things, and then we’re going to Mr. Kun and Junyi’s house for a sleepover, okay?”
“Okay!”
Kun had finished tugging on the gloves then, “There you go, Bin.”
“Thank you, Mr. Kun!” Woobin chirped, then reached out for the other toddler. “Junyi, we match!”
“We match!” Junyi giggled back, grabbing Woobin's whale-patterned hand with his own bunny-patterned one.
You stood up, covering your mouth in delight as you whispered to Kun, “I’m literally going to cry.”
“Way ahead of you,” he whispered back, and when you looked over, you did in fact see a single tear rolling down one of his cheeks.
“Oh, oh my God, Kun.” You wiped it away with your thumb. “What’s—”
“Talk later?”
“Okay, yeah,” you nodded, looking around at the fact that you were still very much in the boys’ classroom, and had other things to do. “Right, of course. Talk later.”
Kun reached up to grab your hand that had wiped the tear away, squeezing it and offering you a smile. He dried his eyes with the sleeve of his other hand, then called for the kids, “Come on, boys. We’ve got to go. You’ll see each other in just a bit.”
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Getting Woobin packed up to spend the night at Kun and Junyi’s was easy, and so was getting the two of them fed once you were there. The difficult part was getting even a single second of semi-private time with Kun to actually talk. The two boys wanted to include both of you in every single thing they did tonight, which was typically endearing, but the exhaustion that plagued Kun’s features the while time still concerned you. It wasn’t until they were finally asleep in Junyi’s room, and you and Kun had cleaned up from dinner, that you finally had an opportunity.
He pulled you over to the couch, and you sat down, expecting one of your normal grown-up, mature, face-to-face talks to happen now. You’d had a few already, about your expectations when you started dating, about the first time you spent the night at the other’s house like this, whenever there was any need to clear the air. Both you and Kun agreed that you were both at the point in your life where you couldn’t deal with the kind of tip-toeing uncertainty of young relationships, you needed something serious, with open, honest communication, especially around the kids.
But instead, Kun practically collapsed on top of you, wrapping his arms around your waist and burying his face in your middle. You cradled his head close to you, running a hand through his hair and stroking a thumb over his cheekbone.
“What’s wrong, Kun?” You murmured. “You seem… drained.”
“I am,” he admitted plainly, defeat in his tone. “Just absolutely… fucking dead.”
“I’m sorry to hear that, love,” you replied quietly.
“But you were such a big help today, thank you.”
“I don’t know how bringing another toddler into your home helped with that, but okay,” you said skeptically, still playing with his hair.
“Having a second set of hands to help with dinnertime, and play time, and bathtime, and bedtime…” His chest heaved with another big sigh. “And just having you around… makes everything easier.”
He reached up to grab one of your hands, lacing his fingers with yours. The grip he had made you think he wasn’t planning on letting go anytime soon. “I don’t want you to leave, Y/N.”
“Kun, I’ll stay for as long as you need me to,” you promised. “A couple nights, a week, whatever you need. Life is hard, especially trying to do everything on your own. Tomorrow’s Saturday, so how about you take the boys out and I’ll tidy up around here, okay?”
“Forever?”
“What?”
“Will you stay forever?”
You stared down at your interlocked hands, the one in his hair stilling. “Are you asking…”
“You said you’d stay however long I need you to. I always need you with me, Y/N. Will you two move in with us?” Kun asked, placing a couple of long kisses to your hand. “Or we can get a new place. I just… can’t imagine having to do this without you. Both of you. All four of us.”
You hummed, your hand resuming its ministrations in his locks. “We’ll probably need a new place… but yes, Kun. We’ll move in with you.”
He quickly kissed his way up your arm to your neck and face, until he was hovering above you, a breathless smile on his features. “Really?”
“I’ll need to talk to Binnie…” You warned. “And like I just said, we’ll probably need to look for a new place, since the boys are used to having their own rooms and we can afford it combined. It won’t be instantaneous, but yes… we can start planning it.”
Then Kun was showering your face in kisses, and you giggled, cupping his face fondly.
“I love you, I love you, I love you.”
“I love you too, Kun,” you pulled him into a soft peck, before his raining kisses started going even lower, below your jaw, your neck, your collarbones. When his hand slipped under your shirt, you looked at him suspiciously. “Hey… I thought you were absolutely fucking dead?”
“Mysterious second wind,” his words were muffled against your skin, but you could feel the sly smirk on his lips.
“Alright, well do you think this second wind can at least be moved into your bedroom?”
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“Y/N, five weeks?!” Kun exclaimed, making you immediately slap a hand over his mouth and look over your shoulder at the two freshly-washed four-year-old boys sitting down to enjoy their post-bathtime show.
“Keep your voice down!” You chastised him in a harsh whisper. The living room was open to the kitchen in your new place, where you and Kun were huddled having your fervent back and forth at the moment. You’d just so very casually dropped the fact that your period had been five weeks late, at perhaps not the most opportune time, washing the dishes, but really you hadn’t meant for it to be a huge deal.
After you took your hand off his mouth, he replied back much more quietly, “Sorry, I’m not upset with you, love, I’m surprised. Why haven’t you taken a test?”
“With work and both the boys’ birthdays, then them starting VPK, I just haven’t had time to go get one.”
“Let’s go get one now then.”
“What, a family trip to the corner store to buy a pregnancy test?” You snorted at the idea, holding a dry plate out to Kun to put away.
He didn’t take the plate, staring at you as he repeated, “Family?”
“You know what I meant…” You whined, putting the dish down on the counter and covering your face in embarrassment. That was the first time either of you had referred to the four of you as one family unit.
He wrapped his arms around you, letting you bury your face in his chest. “I don’t think you even know what you meant, lovey.”
“Ugh, you’re right.” Your brain was way too scrambled at the moment, preoccupied with trying extremely hard to not think about what being late could possibly mean, what a test could possibly say.
“I’m serious, come on. We’ll buy the boys some ice cream, they’ll be none the wiser.”
“Fine, I need to put some real pants on,” you pushed off his chest, gesturing to the dingy sleep shorts were you in. “Can you—”
“Get the boys’ shoes on. On it.” He nodded firmly.
“Thank you, my love.”
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“Kun, I can’t pee with you grinning at me like that. It’s weird.”
With Woobin and Junyi preoccupied with their character popsicles and a movie in the living room, you and Kun were in the small hallway bathroom closest to the living room. It also happened to be the boys’ shared bathroom, the walls covered in vinyl, removable stickers of cartoon characters smiling down at you as unnervingly as Kun was currently. It was far too many eyes for what you were doing, peeing on a drugstore pregnancy test.
“Sorry, sorry,” your boyfriend apologized, diverting his eyes and covering his mouth, though he was clearly still beaming into his hand.
Finally done with that part of the test, you set it atop the box that was sitting on the bathroom counter, washing your hands and dropping back down onto the toilet seat.
“And now we wait,” you declared with a heavy chest.
“Okay.” Kun nodded resolutely, allowing his eyes to return to you now that you’d spoken again, still absolutely glittering in the harsh fluorescents.
“Now would be a good time to talk, about if that’s a plus. You’re still grinning like a maniac, so I have a guess as to what you’re about to say.”
He sighed almost dreamily as he looked up at you, resting his cheek in his hand. “You’re just… the most beautiful woman in the world to me, right now. And I love you, so much.”
“This, me sitting on the toilet in our tiny hallway bathroom, having just peed on a stick in front of you,” you pointed between the two of you, “is one of the least romantic situations I think we’ve ever been in. But, I love you too, you weirdo.”
“That wasn’t my answer, by the way. You go first, you’d be the one carrying any baby of ours, after all.”
“After Woobin, I told myself that if I had another, I’d do it…” You trailed off as you fumbled around for the right word.
“Right?” Kun supplemented hesitantly.
“No, no, I don’t think Woobin was wrong. That’s one thesaurus entry away from ‘mistake,’ as cheesy as that might sound. But, I told myself that I’d do my next one different. I’d be married to someone, we’d have planned the pregnancy over multiple conversations, talked about kids before we even got married in the first place, I’d have talked to Binnie about it, made sure he had the emotional space for a little sibling, too.”
“And we haven’t even talked about getting married…” He breathed out in realization.
You narrowed your eyes. “Qian Kun, do you think for even a second, that I would be with you if I didn’t think that I could marry you one day? After everything you’ve learned about me? After that whole toilet bowl confessional I just gave literally ten seconds ago? Consider this the marriage talk warning. It’s coming, and when it does, I expect you to bring notes.”
“Good point, I’m sorry for doubting you, lovey. I eagerly await the marriage talks, and I’ll make sure to do my research ahead of time.”
“Good.”
“So that’s how you want to do it. What about if that test is positive? Right now?” He returned you to the present, his voice gentle, as you were reminded of the very real, very possible, tangible now that you were being faced with.
You let your head drop forward into your hands as you tried to pick apart the tangled ball that was your thoughts and feelings. Thinking back to when you were doing this by yourself the first time in your workplace bathroom, when you found out you were pregnant with Binnie… you distantly remembered how you felt when you saw that double line, that positive result. There was definitely anxiety, yes, but more than that you remembered an excitement bubbling up and overflowing on top of that the longer that it registered.
This time, you weren’t feeling any of that. Not because you didn’t love the idea of having a child with Kun, but… it just wouldn’t be the right time. The two of you had only recently moved in together, you were still getting used to enmeshing your two—or, four—separate lives into one, you hadn’t even been together for a year, Woobin and Junyi hadn’t been consulted whatsoever, not to mention they had just started VPK and would be going into primary school next year; Kun had just gotten a promotion at work, yes, but you had your eye on your own possible promotion, too. It just… wasn’t right. Swallowing the lump in your throat, you finally looked up at Kun sitting across from you in the narrow space of the hallway bathroom. You could feel the tears gathering in your eyes, his image immediately swimming in your vision.
“Oh, hey, come here, lovey,” he gently ushered you down from your perch on the toilet seat cover onto the ground with him. He settled you in between his legs, wrapping his arms around you, “Sad cry or scary cry?”
You had the urge to smack his arm for treating you like one of the kids, but unfortunately, it was a really good communication tool.
“Goddamn,” you wept against his shirt, clinging onto him. “I don’t know, Kun. I don’t fucking know. It’s not a happy cry, though. And I don’t think that any kid should be brought into the world if their mom isn’t happy at the thought of them.”
He rubbed a hand up and down your back, not faltering for a moment as you spoke. When you were done, he started, “Look, Y/N. I’ll admit, the idea of having a baby with you kind of sent me to the stratosphere there for a second. But, I think that a baby is something that needs to be two enthusiastic yeses, or it’s a no. And you…” he pulled your face out of the crook of his neck to be able to look you in the eye. “Are clearly not enthusiastic nor a yes. So I’m not either. Okay?”
You sniffled, “Okay.”
“Okay,” he repeated, wiping at your tears. “Now, I think it’s been plenty of time. Are you ready to look at the test?”
“Yeah, yeah.”
Kun stretched his arm out, fumbling along the top of the bathroom counter until he had secured the test in his hand. You turned in his arms, fully leaned against him, your back to his chest as he flipped the stick over for you two to read the results together.
Negative.
And you were crying again, but this time you knew that they were tears of relief.
“Oh, thank God,” you whispered, holding a hand over your mouth. “Oh… oh my God.”
“There we go,” Kun murmured, holding you to him by an arm slung over your waist. “Now, call me crazy, but I think we just manifested that negative pregnancy test result.”
You let out a choked laugh, “Would it be manifesting a negative or un-manifesting a positive?”
“Good question.”
He held a foot out until he could reach the step opener of the trash can, tossing the test into it. You sat there with him for who knows how much longer, until the cold of the tile finally seeped through your clothes, and your joints were aching from being curled up on your bathroom floor for so long.
“Oh shit, the boys are all by themselves in the living room,” you mumbled, beginning to detangle yourself from Kun.
“I’ll clean up in here. You get into some pajamas and then go see them, okay? They’ve been the normal amount of quiet, I think the movie’s got them sufficiently occupied, so take your time. I’ll be right behind you.” He reassured you, standing up after you did, and keeping a hand on the small of your back as you went to wash your hands again.
The remnants of the pregnancy test packaging were on the counter, not to mention the general disarray from your breakdown, and the fact that you hadn’t tidied up from the boys’ bathtime earlier that night either. When you looked at yourself in the mirror, you could see that you weren’t in much better shape than the bathroom.
“Okay, yeah. Thank you, Kun.” Your voice wasn’t any louder than a whisper, and it didn’t need to be in the small, quiet space.
He pressed a long kiss to your temple before you left for your bedroom to change out of the clothes that you’d gone to the convenience store in. Putting on the comfiest pajamas you could find, you then shuffled out to the living room, which you were glad to see was in one piece. Tension you didn’t even realize you were carrying released from your shoulders when your eyes fell on the two kids sat on the couch, their attention glued to the screen.
You weren’t sure how long you had been standing there before Woobin finally turned his head to look at you. “Oh hi Mommy!”
“Hi, Ms. Y/N!”
“Hi, boys, can I join you?” You asked.
“Well, yeah!” Junyi said in the most ‘duh!’ tone you’d ever heard a four-year-old imitate. He patted the open space between the two of them. “We saved you a spot here.”
“Oh, thank you.” You sat down exactly where he had gestured, tucking your feet underneath you. Woobin immediately clambered onto your lap, and Junyi scooted in to snuggle into your other side.
“And when Daddy gets here, his spot is over here,” Junyi pointed to the remaining space between him and the arm of the couch. “And he can put the blanket on all of us.”
“Right, of course, bun,” you nodded, wrapping your arms around the two boys to hold them even closer to you.
Woobin touched a hand to your cheek, “Mommy, you’re crying. Sad cry, scary cry, or boo-boo cry?”
“Oh, no, baby, it's a happy cry,” you assured him, wiping at the couple of tears that had eked out again with your sleeve. “It’s because I love you all so much.”
“Happy cry,” he repeated, as if committing the term to memory.
Kun joined the three of you a few minutes later, sliding into his assigned seat and pulling a blanket over the four of you. Mindful of the child in between you two, you rested your head on his shoulder.
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Against your instincts, you shut the front door quietly behind you as you came home that night. You’d gotten caught up at work with a deadline suddenly being moved up. You plopped your purse onto the kitchen table next to the huge LEGO set that you’d started with the boys last weekend as Kun got up from the couch to greet you. He was already in his pajamas, a stark contrast to the office wear you were still in.
“Hey, lovey,” he pecked your cheek, letting you snake both your arms around his waist and hold him closer. “How was work?”
You let out a low, exhausted groan into his shoulder. “Long. If I ever have to read another word again in my life, it’ll be too soon.”
“Then you’ll be very happy to hear that I already read the boys a bedtime story.”
“Shit, am I that late?” You sighed. “I know I told you I’d probably miss dinner but I didn’t mean for you to do bedtime all by yourself, too.”
“It’s okay, I know you would’ve been here if you could. The three of us managed for one night.”
“How was everything? Were they good for you?”
“Absolute angels.”
You lifted your head up to shoot him a disbelieving look. “Our sons? Are you sure you’ve got the right kids in there?”
Kun chuckled, planting a kiss on your lips this time. “You know us too well. Only convinced them to get in bed with bribery.”
“Great, what did you promise them? Extra hour of TV this weekend? Kun, please do not tell me you promised a new toy or—”
“Woah, woah, who do you think I am?” He snorted, clearly offended. “I just had to promise that you’d give them their goodnight kiss when you got home. They were very concerned about going to sleep without one.”
Relief immediately flooded your system, along with a warm fondness. “Oh, good. I’ll go hold up our end, then.”
“Before you do,” Kun held you by the waist to keep you from walking away yet. He lowered his voice, tone turning serious. “Woobin was asking for you before lights-out. Not just for his goodnight kiss, but he wouldn’t tell me what was going on. I have a feeling he might still be up when you go in.”
You nodded thoughtfully. “Okay, I’ll pop into his room second. Thanks for the heads-up.”
With a final pat on the cheek, you left Kun’s warm embrace and treaded down the hall that contained the boys’ bedrooms and shared bathroom. You slowly opened the door to Junyi’s room first. The room was pitch black save for the dwindling light from his glow-in-the-dark ceiling stars, and you crept up to his bedside. Just able to see the faint outline of him under his covers, you gently brushed away some of his hair and laid a soft kiss on his forehead.
“Night, bun-bun,” you murmured, then kissed his pudgy little cheek one more time before standing up. He didn’t stir, his breathing remained peaceful and as you ducked back out you closed the door even more quietly than you had opened it.
As soon as you pushed the door to Woobin’s room open, you knew he was awake. He was in a phase of sleeping with a night-light on, meaning that you could immediately see his eyes staring at you.
“Hi, Mommy,” he deadpanned, hands folded together over his stomach.
You entered the room, shutting the door behind you. “Hi, baby. What are you still doing up?”
He squirmed a little under the covers, refusing to meet your eyes as you came to sit on his mattress next to him. “Waiting for my goodnight kiss.”
“Oh, you could’ve gone to sleep,” you reassured him, moving his bangs out of the way of his forehead. “Mommy would’ve still come and given you your goodnight kiss.”
He was silent as you leaned down to smooch his forehead. Pulling back, you asked, “Is that all, Binnie?”
Woobin mumbled something that you couldn’t quite make out.
“I’m sorry, could you say that again for me? I couldn’t hear you.”
“I want to say something, but it’s after my bedtime…”
“Don’t worry, baby. I want to hear what you have to say. You can say it now.”
“I don’t want Junyi to be mad at me.”
“Why do you think Junyi would be mad at you?”
“You can’t tell them!” He suddenly exclaimed, pleading and desperate.
“Tell who? Junyi and Mr. Kun?” You asked, brow furrowing with confusion.
He nodded fervently, panic on his features.
“You remember our rules about sharing things?”
“If it’s about safety or respect, we all have to know,” he recited mournfully. “It’s not! I promise! I think…”
“How about you tell me, and I’ll tell you if it’s something we should tell everyone. I won’t get mad, and you and me can talk about it for as long as you want first. Does that sound okay?”
“Okay…”
“Whenever you’re ready,” you said soothingly, watching him take a few deep breaths to calm himself down.
“I-I want to call Mr. Kun ‘Daddy.’”
You couldn’t help but smile widely at him, taking your son’s hand in yours. “That’s wonderful, baby. I think it would make Mr. Kun really happy that you want to.”
“But that’s what Junyi calls him…”
“And you think it would upset Junyi if you called him the same thing?”
“Yeah,” he sniffled.
“That’s very considerate, Binnie,” you told him proudly.
“Are you going to tell them?”
“No, not if you don’t want me to,” you shook your head. “But I think that it would be a good idea for you, Junyi, and Mr. Kun to all talk about this together. When you’re ready.”
Woobin sniffled again, and you leaned over to hug your boy. He immediately threw his arms around your neck, burying his wet face in the collar of your blouse.
When you finally left his room after watching him fall asleep with your own two eyes, you found Kun reclined in your bed, bedside lamp on as he read a book.
“Is Woobin alright?” Kun flipped his book shut and set it aside.
You shimmied out of your work clothes. “Yeah, he’s okay. Just… needed Mom before bed.”
He nodded, watching as you pulled sleep clothes on and shuffled over to the bathroom. “Mm, of course. Mr. Kun wasn’t enough…” He sighed dramatically, making you lean your head back out to glare at him, toothbrush hanging out of your mouth.
“Shut up,” you grumbled after spitting your toothpaste out and flicking the bathroom light off. You plopped into bed, snuggling up to your pillow and closing your eyes. “He loves you, you know that.”
The sound of the bedside lamp clicking off rang through your room before you felt the sheets shift around and Kun scoot closer to you.
“I know, I’m just not ‘Mom,’” he mused, grabbing your hands to tug you toward him.
You obliged, rolling over to face him and rest your head on his shoulder. He kissed your forehead, still holding your hands against his chest.
“Goodnight, my love,” you breathed out, “Thank you again for handling them alone tonight.”
“Goodnight, lovey.” He rubbed soothing circles into the palm of your hand with his thumb.
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As you watched Kun alternate between pushing Woobin and Junyi on the swingset, you couldn’t help but smile to yourself. It was peaceful afternoons like these that you treasured the most. You recognized a few more figures that were approaching the playground, waving to Johnny and Jaehyun in the distance as Mark and Sungchan immediately ran up to your two boys. The three dads all chatted as the four kids took off from the swingset at full speed towards the slides. You were on a bench a little further from the playset, and had no qualms about sitting and resting when you got the chance.
The playground was within walking distance of yours and Kun’s house, and right by the school, so it wasn’t a total shock to see some of your kids’ classmates there. You watched with amusement as all three of the adults perked up like meerkats towards the kids, who were now lined up at the monkey bars. Mark was first up, and must have been asking for help, as Johnny yelled out a ‘just a sec, champ!’ before gesturing between the three dads and all the kids clambering for their turn.
Apparently, Johnny and Jaehyun had decided it was their turn to help all four kids with the bars, as Kun lumbered over to plop down next to you at the picnic table.
“Thank God they showed up, I don’t know if I have it left in me to carry them back and forth across the monkey bars for the next hour,” Kun grunted, dropping his head down to rest on your shoulder.
You snickered, wrapping an arm around his shoulders as you watched all the children play. Woobin was the littlest, needing Jaehyun’s help all the way across the bars. The dad still gave him as enthusiastic of a double high-five as he gave Junyi after him, who was able to do a couple by himself after getting hoisted up there.
“Woobin wants to call you Dad, you know,” you blurted out in the quietness that had fallen between you and Kun.
Kun lifted his head up to look at you with wide eyes. “He does?”
“Yeah, he told me the other day. But he thinks Junyi will be mad at him.”
“Ohh…” He breathed out, nodding slowly.
“I would’ve said something to you, but he asked me not to tell you and Junyi at first. We had another conversation about it this morning, and he finally agreed that I could talk to you about it at least,” you explained. “I told him that you three should all talk. I think he’s really, really scared of making Junyi upset. They’re such good friends, you know?”
You looked on with fondness as the gaggle of kids around the monkey bars took off at a run away from Johnny and Jaehyun, apparently playing some kind of tag or hide and seek now. Woobin and Junyi were running off together hand-in-hand, giggling and cackling with laughter as Johnny mimicked chasing after them.
Kun ran a knuckle up and down your arm, trailing his hand down until he could lace his fingers with yours. “I know, sometimes I look at them and I think it’s like they’re… brothers.”
“Mm, yeah,” you hummed noncommittally. Finally taking your eyes off the playground, you turned to face him fully, covering his hand with both of yours. “Kun, with all this… it makes me really happy, you and Junyi make me really happy, and all four of us being together. But, I don’t— I’m not trying to replace Junyi’s mom. Despite what she did, he’s already had one, whatever memories he’s got of her. I want to be whatever he wants me to be. So, I’m perfectly content to be ‘Ms. Y/N’ for the rest of my life.”
“I asked him the other day, if he remembered his mom at all,” he admitted quietly.
“W-Why?”
“Morbid curiosity, I guess. He was so young, I wasn’t sure if he would. Funny thing was, he told me yes. So I asked what he remembered about her. And he just looked at me with the most confused expression I think I’ve ever seen him have and he goes ‘She picked me up from school today.’”
“Oh, oh my God,” you let out a choked chuckle, a lump growing in your throat.
“You picked him up from school that day, Y/N,” Kun said pointedly, poking you in the arm for emphasis.
“Yeah, I had guessed that,” you spluttered out, a wide, beaming smile on your face as you replayed those words in your mind over and over again.
“So it seems like, to me, you’re the only one with hang-ups about this, lovey.”
“I’m gonna fucking cry— no, scratch that, I already am,” you sniffled, wiping at your eyes with one of your hands.
“Sad cry, scary cry, boo-boo cry, or happy cry?” Kun asked teasingly, thumb wiping away one of your tears.
“Happy cry,” you answered, despite the fact that he definitely already knew. “So happy. I love you so much, both of you.”
“Junyi!” The distant voice of Johnny called out, chastising.
Both you and Kun snapped your heads up to look, only to see said child running at you full-speed.
“Woobin! Let your parents…” Jaehyun trailed off in defeat as a second small body hurtled towards you. “Sorry! We tried to let you guys have a moment…”
“It’s alright!” Kun called back to them as the two boys finally made it to you.
You lifted Junyi up onto the bench next to you with no hesitation, and Kun plopped Woobin onto his lap, his little legs reaching into yours. Junyi sat himself down on one of your legs, facing you with the most worried, intense gaze on his face.
“Are you okay, Ms. Y/N?!” He wiped at your wet cheeks. “What happened?”
“Nothing, hunny-bun,” you promised, holding both of his little hands and dropping loud smooches to them. “Happy tears, they’re happy tears. I’m sorry for worrying you.”
“Because you love us so much?” Woobin asked, supplying the last reason you’d given him for your happy tears.
“Yeah, always, bubbles,” you grabbed his head to be able to press a kiss to his forehead. “Always love you guys so much.”
“Why does it make you cry?”
“Because I have so much love inside me for all of you that sometimes it feels like I could just… burst!” You said with enough of a sing-song-y inflection that it made the two kids giggle, especially when you mimicked an explosion with your hands. “So instead of spontaneously exploding, it comes out as tears sometimes. Tears aren’t bad, Binnie, remember?”
“I know, Mommy,” he nodded dutifully.
Kun spoke up then, “I think we should all talk about what was making your mom so happy this time, boys.”
Junyi looked at his dad with alarm. “What? Bin and I didn’t do anything! We’re not in trouble, right?”
“I didn’t do anything!” Woobin pouted. “Junyi—”
“No, you’re not in trouble,” Kun hushed them gently. “I just said it was making your mom happy. What about you two getting in trouble would make your mom happy?”
“Oh.”
“I mean, it’s about what you two want to call us.”
You were still cradling Woobin’s head, and stroked over his hair reassuringly. “It’s okay, Binnie. Tell them what you told me.”
“I-I want to call Mr. Kun ‘Daddy,’” he mumbled, looking down intently at his lap. “But I don’t have to if it’s going to make you sad, Junyi!”
Junyi listened to Woobin, face turning entirely confused. “But he is your dad! Why wouldn’t you call him that?” He turned his bewildered look to you next. “And you’re our mom, right?!”
“Of course I am, bun-bun,” you smiled at him. “Binnie just needs to know if it’s going to make you upset for both of you to call your dad the same thing.”
“No, Bin, s’not gonna make me sad,” Junyi said strongly. “Will it make you sad if we call her the same thing?”
Woobin sniffled and looked up, finally displaying his teary eyes to everybody. He shook his head, and you felt relief blossom out through every part of you. Kun squeezed him tightly.
“Bub, sad cry, scary cry, or happy cry?” Kun asked him.
The child took several deep breaths before he finally answered. “I-I think it was scary first, but now it’s a happy cry, Daddy. Like Mommy does.”
Kun let out a strangled chuckle as he hugged Woobin even tighter to him, planting a kiss to his temple. “That’s okay, bub. Look at you, big kid with big feelings.”
“Daddy’s crying too!” Junyi gasped. “Is it happy crying, Daddy?”
“Yeah, buddy, it is,” he confirmed, cheeks noticeably damp.
Junyi felt at his own dry eyes. “Why am I not happy crying? Mommy, why am I not happy crying? ‘M happy! I am!”
“Oh, bunny, it’s okay,” you couldn’t help but laugh, rubbing his back affectionately. “You don’t have to cry to be really happy. Sometimes you’ll be really, really happy, the happiest you’ve ever been, and you won’t cry. Everybody’s different.”
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“I do.”
“I do!” Sooyoung squealed.
The officiant’s remaining words were drowned out by the crowd erupting into cheers as Sooyoung was dipped into a kiss by her now-wife. You clapped from your place behind her as her maid-of-honor, your cheeks already hurting from all the smiling you’d been doing that day.
As they practically ran back down the aisle together, giddy, you were left standing at the arch, holding SooSoo’s wedding bouquet that she’d forgotten in her excitement. The music swelled again, your cue for the wedding party to file out as well. You fell in beside Ahrin’s best man, taking a more reasonable pace down the walkway. Looking into the guests that had stood up, you caught Kun’s eye from one of the middle rows, a familiar wide, overjoyed grin on his face. He was in the stratosphere again.
You met up with Kun at your table at the reception, the wedding party table. While he wasn’t in the party, he was your plus one, and your friend of course made sure he was seated with you. After the obligatory speeches—including one that you had to give—everyone could start eating. Kids were allowed at the wedding, but you wanted to make sure that you could put all your focus on making this the best day ever for your friend and didn’t want to have the boys out too late either, so they were at home with a babysitter. After the food was the couple’s first dance, and you watched fondly from your table as Sooyoung and Ahrin swayed together, clearly in their own world, exchanging words and giggles and laughs that you couldn’t hear.
Kun’s hand and yours were entwined on your lap, and when the DJ asked for the wedding party and their plus-ones to join the newlyweds, you pulled him to floor by that hand. As Kun’s other hand settled on your hip, you affectionately smoothed down the lapel of his suit jacket before resting yours on the curve where his neck met his shoulder.
“Hi, gorgeous,” he beamed at you.
“Hi, handsome,” you replied back humorously. “So, what’s on your mind?”
“You mean there could possibly be anything on my mind other than the fact that I’m dancing with the love of my life?”
“You’ve got that look on your face.”
“What look?”
“The ‘I’ve been launched into the stratosphere picturing our future together’ look,” you said frankly, but still with the same fond smirk on your lips. “So? What are you thinking about?”
His eyes widened minutely before he chuckled. “I’m having a good time with you, lovey. Is a guy not allowed to smile about that?”
“You are…”
“That’s all I was thinking about.” He pulled you closer, pressing a kiss to your cheek. “Always in the stratosphere when I’m with you.”
Despite his sweet words, you felt a twinge of disappointment in your chest, resting your cheek on his shoulder so he couldn’t see the contemplative frown on your face. The two of you were living together before Sooyoung and Ahrin had even met, you were raising two kids together right now, and had already discussed getting married—binders, spreadsheets, all your joint expectations for what you wanted out of a hypothetical future partnership like that. Why was he shying away from the subject now? Was seeing you actually at a wedding making him have second thoughts? Did it suddenly all seem too real? As if the binders and spreadsheets weren’t real enough?
Those weren’t questions to ask him now at your best friend’s wedding, so you bit your tongue, continuing to let him sway the two of you across the dance floor.
Later in the night, after your feet had gotten tired, Kun excused himself to use the restroom. You took the opportunity to catch your breath at the wedding party’s table. You’d been darting around the venue the whole time, either greeting friends of friends, dancing with people you knew, or stopping mishaps before they mis-happened. Some guests had started going home, so you felt somewhat comfortable taking a short rest.
You weren’t expecting one of the brides herself to sit down beside you, however.
“What’s wrong, Y/N?” Sooyoung asked knowingly.
You tried to perk up, slapping on a smile. “It’s nothing, SooSoo. My feet are tired. Why aren’t you with Ahrin?”
“We’re about to be together for the rest of our lives. I think she can piss by herself right now,” she replied.
“Oh, right.”
“And, it’s also my wedding, and I don’t want my best friend all sad and alone at my wedding. I know you’ve been fixing all my problems all day and all night. So will you let me help you with one of yours?”
You looked around to see if you could spot Kun anywhere, then leaned in towards her with a sigh. “Kun’s been acting weird today.”
“How?”
“We always talk about getting married pretty openly. But like, now that we’re at a wedding, it feels like he’s avoiding the topic.”
“Why haven’t you guys gotten married? You practically act like it anyway.”
“He still wants to surprise me with the proposal,” you said. “I told him no public proposals, no proposing on birthdays or holidays, and no proposing at other people’s weddings. But other than that…”
“When was that conversation? About getting married and engaged?”
You took a sip of your drink as you thought. “Mm… almost a year ago? Maybe ten months? It was a few conversations.”
“So Ahrin proposed like right after that,” she surmised. “He’s probably waiting for the right time. Making sure you weren’t too stressed with the kids, then the holidays, and being my maid-of-honor. Both of you are very thoughtful and also over-plan everything.”
“That’s true,” you sighed. “And also a bit less salient of a point coming from the poster child of U-Haul lesbians.”
Sooyoung wrapped an arm around your shoulders and rubbed your upper arm. “We’re different people in different relationships in different places in life, Y/N. You’ve got a really good guy who is head over heels for you and loves your kid as much as he loves you. Don’t forget all that in one night.”
“You’re right, SooSoo,” you leaned your head against hers. “Thank you.”
“Anytime.” She pecked your hair.
“Is everything okay?” Kun’s voice came from behind you, sounding very concerned.
“Oh, yeah, Y/N’s getting a little warm in here,” SooSoo informed him brightly, letting you go and standing back up. “Why don’t you take her outside, Kun? There’s a nice little garden walkway, I think there’s some benches out there.”
“Yeah, of course. Thanks, Sooyoung.”
Your friend gave you one last squeeze of your arm before taking back off into the crowd. Kun ushered you to your feet and guided you out of the main reception hall and into the much cooler nighttime air. Sooyoung was right, it was way less hot and stuffy out here, and there was a short walkway leading to a garden with some benches. Kun sat you down again there, rubbing your back as you stared listlessly out at the fountain in front of you. The fountain wasn’t on, the water inside of it still, and the air around you quiet and empty. In the distance, you could hear the music from the wedding venue, the thumping bass, and above you, a few stars dotted the sky next to a silver crescent moon.
“Is this better?” Kun asked you quietly.
“Yeah, thanks, Kun,” you replied shortly, still unable to shake the discomfort you felt from earlier. Despite your conversation with Sooyoung making sense in the moment, now that you were back with Kun, that uncertainty crept back into your mind.
“It was a lovely ceremony.”
“Yeah. SooSoo’s dress is beautiful on her.”
“Do you want to go home? If you’re not feeling—”
You suddenly straightened up to look Kun in the eye. “We’re going to get married, right? You do want to marry me, right, Kun?”
“Wh—” He scrambled to grab your hands in his, holding them tight. “Of course, love. Yes, of course I want to marry you, Y/N. Why would you think I didn’t?”
“I know we talk about it but… you haven’t proposed. And you’ve been acting weird tonight. And by weird, I mean normal. Like, not talking about marriage. We’ll be buying groceries, and you’ll somehow bring up us getting married, but now we’re at an actual wedding and you haven’t talked about us having one of our own at all…” The dam broke, all of your anxious rambles coming forth at once. “Nothing about if we should do this or that at ours, what flowers you might want, or even— You saw me at an altar holding a bouquet and are acting like it’s no big deal! You see our future in everything, but not today, and it’s been making me think that maybe you don’t see a future anymore.”
Oh god, you were fucking crying now. This was not how you wanted this conversation to go. Tears spilled down your cheeks, and you pushed them away with the back of your hand as you sniffled and tried to calm yourself down.
“Y/N, lovey, I am so sorry,” Kun’s voice was wavering too, and you knew he was holding back his own tears. “I do want to marry you, and I never wanted to make you think that I didn’t. You were right earlier, I’ve been in the fucking stratosphere all day, and I’ve been going crazy trying not to say every single thing that pops into my head about marrying you because I’ve got your ring and everything planned out for the proposal and it was going to be soon, I just wanted it to be a surprise for you and I didn’t want to accidentally spoil anything for you. But I never meant to hurt you, and I am so, so sorry that I did. God, I love you so much, it felt like my heart was going to give out when I saw you at the altar with a wedding bouquet, and then dancing after the first dance—”
You crushed your lips against his, letting go of one of his hands to wrap a hand around the back of his neck. He cupped your cheek softly, even as you kissed him like you hadn’t seen him in decades, and like you might never again, feverishly, past the point where you were out of oxygen and your head started spinning. Kun pulled back to pick up your left hand, bringing it up to his lips and pressing a kiss on your ring finger.
“If I had it with me, I’d put your ring on you right now,” he promised, pressing another kiss to the empty knuckle. “Hell, we could elope tonight, find a drive-thru chapel.”
“The boys might feel left out,” you chuckled, pulling his mouth back to yours.
He hummed appreciatively against your lips, adding in between kisses, “Good— point. Pick them up on the way?”
“It’s past their bedtime.” You kissed him again. “They’d be cranky if we woke them up now.”
“Foiled again by two five-year-olds’ bedtime,” he sighed dramatically, leaning his forehead against yours.
“So how were you going to do it?”
“Do what?”
“Propose to me.”
“I’m still going to?”
“Well, I feel like I just ruined your surprise.”
“Me telling you what it’s going to be, would be ruining the surprise,” he scoffed and pulled back to let you see his indignant features. “Which I’m not going to do.”
You laughed, pecking his cheek. “I’m looking forward to it, my love.”
“And I’m looking forward to marrying you, and spending the rest of my life with you,” Kun sighed dreamily, pulling you in closer and resting his head against yours again. “I meant it when I said I’m always in the stratosphere with you, you know.”
“Me too, Kun.” You looped an arm around his back and under his suit jacket.
A few beats of peaceful silence went by, neither you nor Kun speaking, just the distant sounds of the music from the wedding, your own synchronized breathing, and a far-off train horn. You looked from the fountain up at the glowing half-moon above you.
“Thank you, lovey,” Kun broke the quiet, and you shifted your gaze to him, raising a curious eyebrow.
“You’re welcome?” You replied with slight amusement. “For what, love?”
“Somebody once told me that the whole point of being a parent was letting our kids know that they’re not alone in all this,” he began, rubbing his thumb over your shoulder where his hand rested.
“Who said that?”
“You did, lovey.”
“I did? Ooh, I’m smart,” you chuckled, patting his thigh. “You picked well, Qian Kun.”
He smiled at you fondly. “I know.”
“When did I say that?”
“Before we were even dating, you had invited Junyi and me to your apartment for a charcuterie night. When we were making that pitch for the preschool fundraising committee.”
“Oh, oh, oh, right.” You nodded quickly as the memories of that came flooding back to you. “You remember me saying that?”
“Of course. You completely changed my view on parenting that night.”
“Glad it was so life-changing for you.”
“It was also the moment I knew I was going to fall in love with you.”
You couldn’t help but laugh maybe a little too hard, “Oh, Kun.”
“What’s that laugh for?” He chuckled lightly despite his obvious confusion.
“I’m just remembering how I was totally going to jump your bones that night and then Junyi walked in. Meanwhile you are just… so sweet, as always,” you admitted, stroking his cheek with the back of your fingers.
Kun’s eyes crinkled as he laughed and keeled forward a little. You let him laugh into your neck, cradling the back of his head as his shoulders continued to shake.
“I—” He coughed into his elbow as he righted himself and tried to compose himself again. His eyes were sparkling with tears from how hard he’d laughed as he looked at you now, and you affectionately touched the crinkles around his eye as a couple more giggles escaped him. Once he’d finally sobered up enough, he tried again, “You’ve also helped me realize that’s not just what being a parent is about, though. That’s what being a partner is, too. Making sure your person knows they’re not doing it alone. And I hope that’s how I make you feel, too.”
“Qian Kun, love of my life that you are—” you shook your head and grabbed his face with two hands. “Of course you do, and it’s taking everything in me not to squish your head right now because of how much I love you.”
Kun just laughed again, covering your hands with his and slotting your lips together.
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⤷ masterlist
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This is a little fic from one of my asks/prompts on @ghostbite0 page about their tiny 21 trio au, such a good au I literally bawl every time... anyways tadaaaaa (I will be posting more trust gang)
🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷
Sanemi could feel something felt off when he woke up. Like a little pulling In the the back of the head. He sat up and pushed away the little puppy dog he'd been sleeping with (someone keeps putting it in his arms he swears). Sanemi looks around the room he and the other babies had been staying in trying to wake himself up. He realized they weren't here in the crib with him, he was confused but he preferred it that way (no matter what the little voice in the back of his head said).
He pushed himself up and got up holding the bars of his crib getting ready to yell at someone to get him out of this thing before he hears it. He knows that laugh. The tugging in the back of his mind overtakes his whole little baby brain. An excited scream breaks out of Sanemi's mouth when he sees a flash of purple go by. 
Genya freezes, was that Sanemi? He froze thinking he heard wrong but he knew he was right. Obanai was with Mitsuri who was trying to give him a bottle and Giyuu was with Tanjiro. Sanemi got put down for a nap after he dumped his food onto the floor. Genya's nervous, ever since his brother got turned into a baby his behavior toward him totally flipped. Sanemi used to avoid Genya like a plague and now its like the two are the best of friends. It was overwhelming for the poor teen. His big adult angsty older brother who acted like Genya didn't mean anything to him was now a little baby who wanted nothing more than to hang out with him (when he's in baby mode again). A whine breaks him out of this thoughts. 
Genya hesitates for a bit longer until the whining because sobbing. He rushes into the room, almost tripping on a stuffed animal (Mitsuri swears it's to keep the babies entertained but everyone knows it's all for Obanai). Sanemi giggles through his tears and bounces in his place. Genya pauses and tries to think of the last time his brother looked even remotely happy to see him. He guessed he took too long because Sanemi throws his stuffed dog at his face and whines with as much anger his baby body can muster (he looks like a kicked puppy with his watery eyes, chubby cheeks and tiny bit of drool on the right corner of his mouth).
“Alright Nemi I'm right here, it's okay”. Genya reaches over the crib bars and picks Sanemi up. A happy coo comes out of the baby and his brother wipes his snot covered face with a blue rag. Rags and bibs were an absolute necessity when the trio was in baby mode or eating. Sanemi has a bit of a dribble problem, Obanai is always suckling on his pacifier or little mittens, and Giyuu… he's something else. Sanemi squeals and shoves his face in his brother's neck, smelling the smallest hint of gun powder and mint. Genya chuckles, “You're such a little dweeb” and bends over to pick up the stuffed animal his baby brother chucked at him. His brother babbles out what sounds like “You're a dweeb”.
Genya tucks the toy in Sanemi's arms and the boy screams in delight and babbles random unintelligible words. Genya caught maybe the word puppy and his name but you couldn't tell with the way Sanemi was shaking his head back and forth. Genya tickles his brother's side and soaks in all the happy laughter he gets as a response. The teen looks around the room for something to do before deciding to go to the comfy corner covered in pillows and blankets. It was made after Giyuu smacked his head on the floor trying to find a comfy spot to lay down. It also doubles as a playpen and calm down corner/time out corner which was very effective for the baby Genya was holding who was prone to meltdowns for whatever reason.  
Genya steps over the makeshift gate and settles in between the pillows and blankets with his brother on his lap. The babbles continued with Sanemi smacking the puppy on his big brothers tummy. Genya smiled softly at Sanemi smiling little face and sparkling eyes. “Be gentle Nemi, don't be mean to your puppy okay?” Sanemi crawled off Genya with a little pat to his puppy and picked up a dragon plush for Genya. Genya chuckled as he realized his brother wanted to play with stuffed animals. When his brother got like this he especially enjoyed playing pretend, it was really cute. “Alright Nemi, whats our little story?” Genya smiled as he sat up across from his brother with the dragon in his hand. 
The two played for what felt like hours and Sanemi began to yawn again. Genya wiped his mouth again and laid down with him. His baby brother laid on his chest sniffling softly with one arm curled around his puppy and a hand clutching his brother's clothes. Genya rubbed up and down Sanemi's back until his breathing slowed. “Goodnight Nemi, I love you so much…” Genya pressed a kiss to his brother's forehead before laying down to think about how his life had totally flipped on him.
Genya woke up to angry babbling and things being thrown at him. “Nemi what are you doing? Come here let's get you dressed and fed”. He stood up and cracked his back before turning towards a pouty and red faced Sanemi in the corner of the room, the puppy laid nearby. When Genya tried to pick Sanemi up, the boy exploded into angry babbles with hateful eyes. Genya sighed and left to go get Gyomei to calm his chihuahua of a baby brother. So much for bonding time. 
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autisticlancemcclain · 1 year ago
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Keith doesn’t sleep a wink the following night. He quickly packs a bunch of supplies into a pod, and then spends hours staring at the base's scanners, waiting for the castle to pop up. He doesn’t hesitate for even a second when it finally does, barely remembering to check in with Kolivan before speedily manoeuvring out of the base and into the castle’s waiting flight deck. 
As promised, the team is gathered there to meet him, clambering over each other to be the first to greet him when he walks out of the pod. It should be flattering, should make a pleased flush redden his skin from his neck to the roots of his hair. It’s everything he’s ever wanted; that kind of love, that kind of joyful acceptance, an excitement to see him. 
But he barely even notices. All of his attention is trained on the figure so far away from everyone else he’s practically shroud in shadows, stiff and stone-faced. Lance stands with a duffel clenched tightly in his fists, jacket zipped up to his neck and hood halfway pulled over his hair.
Everything he sees makes him want to fall over. He almost feels nauseous, and he’s not entirely sure why. Lance has his off-days, Keith knows this. There were days when Keith had to help Lance fight his way out of bed, and when he did the same for Keith. Keith has held him as he sobbed himself to pain on the observation deck floor. Keith has watched him get overwhelmed and mean and snappy and then guilty for days afterwards. 
But he’s never seen Lance like this. He’s never seen Lance…shrink, collapsing into himself so deeply, keep himself so distant. The closest thing he ever saw was when he came to Keith’s room talking about five lions and six paladins, about a seventh wheel.
I solved that problem, he thinks, increasingly desperate. Lance was backed into a corner so Keith threw himself out of the room to give him space. That was the point, that was the purpose, that is why he has stayed in a stupid grey bunk he hates and nodded blankly to masked people he’s not allowed to familiarise himself with and stubbornly refused to leave a man behind no matter how much trouble he gets in. 
He was supposed to have fixed things, and now everything has gotten worse.
“Keith!” Pidge screams the second he emerges from the door, sprinting at him and damn near tackling him to the floor. Despite himself and his dizzying confusion he smiles softly, squeezing her right back.
“Hey, Pigeon,” he says, and she must have really missed him because she doesn’t even deck him for it. 
“You need to call us more,” she grumbles at him, and he snorts and asks her how that holoprojector he asked her for is coming along. 
Before she can launch into yet another rant about how far from the realm of possibility that is, the rest of the team catches up to her, and this time he really does hit the floor. Luckily he lands sprawled on his brother, who only sighs fondly and flicks him on the forehead. 
“We’ve all missed you so much,” he says. “Not the same here without you, squirt.”
Because Keith has misses his brother, he refrains from turning around and throwing hands with him right in the hangar, because why would he call Keith that he’s a grown ass man, basically, not six, Shiro what the fuck. The team teases him anyway because they are the worst, but Keith rolls his eyes and takes it. Between Hunk’s bawling and Pidge’s snark and Allura’s hand gripped in his, Keith can almost pretend like he’s just back from a quick and risky errand, that everything is normal, that his family is just excited to see him and they’re gonna head off for dinner together in a few. The familiar foreignness of it all is almost settled around him like a heavy blanket.
Almost.
“I believe we have an exchange to get on with,” drawls a voice so pretentious it makes Keith recoil even before the cruelty of his words kick in. 
Lotor stands in the middle of the room like he’s centre fucking stage, hip cocked, inspecting his nails, casual and unbothered. A quick glance to the side confirms that Lance’s jaw has tightened at the comment, posture tensed further. Keith looks back to Lotor and wishes with his whole heart that he had laser eyes via Clark Kent so he could fucking obliterate him. He settles for intensely praying for his downfall to the universe, which isn’t enough but will have to be until Keith can sacrifice him for the greatest good or something.
An exchange. Like Lance is a fuckin’...low rate commodity, or something. 
Keith is honestly more disturbed by the fact that no one else seems to be terribly bothered by the comment. He wonders if he’s being too sensitive, if he’s reading into things, if his own hatred for Prince L’Oreal is clouding what could be a similar relationship to what Keith and Lance have, with all the insults and competitions.
The actual thought of that makes him physically gag. 
No, that’s not it. Keith is not mistaking the pain that is radiating off of Lance, the way the air itself in the castle feels wrong. 
“I’m ready to go if you are, Lance,” Keith calls, as softly as he can manage. Unfortunately it doesn’t manage to go far, and Lance only nods once, tightening the duffel over his shoulder and walking over. His steps are deliberate, at least, no downtrodden shuffling – there’s some stubbornness within him still. It’s better than nothing.
“Aw, no, already?” Hunk complains, sniffling. 
Despite the storm raging in Keith’s head, he manages a smile in Hunk’s direction, equally flattered and amused by the affection.
“We’ll be back, man,” Keith promises. “Mission is only supposed to take a few days. Maybe we’ll finish up early and I won’t tell Kolivan, huh, Lance? Spend a couple days here.”
He smiles as brightly as he can manage in Lance’s direction, receiving only a tight-lipped grimace in response, an attempt without the verve to follow through. 
“Yeah, sure.”
He gives the pile of teammates a wide berth as he climbs into the pod, disappearing quickly into the back. Keith tries to pretend his words weren’t sullied with bitterness.
It takes longer than he would like to finally bid everyone goodbye and crawl back into the pod, which he feels a little bad about. Both because he doesn’t want to feel like any interaction with his family is at all a burden, even a goodbye, and because he doesn’t want to keep Lance waiting. But he’s in a rough place right now, off-kilter and almost disoriented, so he cuts himself some slack, breathing deeply as he pulls out of the hangar and back into dead space. He puts the tiny but powerful thrusters up as high as they will go, zooming along at top speeds. He stays in the pilot’s chair, hand firmly on the yoke, until the castle is well out of view, until they are surrounded on all sides by endless darkness. Only then does he steel himself to put the pod on autopilot, to breathe deeply and turn around to face the oppressive awkwardness filling up the small space.
“Hey, Lance,” he says quietly, sitting gingerly on the floor in front of his seat. He’s relieved that Lance doesn’t straight up move away like he expected. He’s even more relieved to notice that Lance doesn’t tense up at his mere presence.
He barely acknowledges Keith past a nod of the head, though, which is depressing. Keith wants to ask another question, get more than a nod out of him so desperately it’s actually embarrassing, but he manages to restrain himself. He knows maybe better than anyone else what it feels like to be crowded by questions when you already feel like you’re suffocating. Keith will just have to wait for Lance, however long it takes.
Thankfully, he doesn’t wait very long.
“I didn’t get any details.” Lance’s voice startles Keith, not because he isn’t expecting it – all he’s been doing is waiting for Lance to talk – but because it’s nothing like he expects. His voice is almost normal, not strained hoarse or even bitter like it was earlier. If Keith squeezes his eyes shut and pretends the last several months didn’t happen, he can almost convince himself that he and Lance are sitting at the briefing room table late at night, heads bent together, trying to iron out a plan for their upcoming mission. He wants that back so badly he aches with it, but the ache is familiar enough now that he thinks he can bear it.
“It’s, uh, a quintessence hunt,” Keith explains. “Or, well, kind of. Hopefully. Kolivan gives a lot of details at once and he speaks in this super depressing monotone and I swear to God I do everything I can to pay attention but at some point it just sounds like the teacher in Charlie Brown. So. That’s my bad.”
He has to force air back into his lungs by the end of it and he’s red in the face to boot. That’s maybe the most words he’s ever spoken in one go (hyperbole whatever let him live) and of course he sounds like the biggest dweeb. Why hasn’t becoming a super cool space ninja made him more aloof and mysterious? This isn’t fair. What happened to gay rights.
To his great surprise, his dorky ramble is rewarded by a flash of Lance’s smile, so brief he would have convinced himself he imagined it if he hadn’t spent so much of his life seeking it out. It’s gone faster than it existed, Lance’s expression falling back into something carefully blank, but the fact that it was there at all is the biggest relief.
Lance takes the tablet Keith hands to him, mission file pulled up and ready to go. He squints slightly as he reads it, tilting his head to the side. “We have to go through…wait, Keith, is this right?” He flips the tablet over to Keith, zoomed in on a pair of coordinates. “This is, like, right next to a black hole. RIght right next to, worryingly next to. I don’t like how close this is. This pod is not really built for that, I don’t think.”
Keith doesn’t recognise the coordinates, so he can’t really say, but there’s a fair bit riding on this mission, so he doubts Kolivan has fucked this particular detail up. 
“Well, it’s either safe or no longer our problem.”
“I suppose.”
A little disappointed that Keith’s attempt at a joke didn’t do much to lighten Lance’s expression, he lets them lapse into silence, tilting his head back onto the seat and closing his eyes as the pod zooms forwards. 
They have a long journey ahead of them.
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crushedsweets · 5 months ago
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Awhile back you answered an ask on how other creeps would respond to Toby's death, and I was wondering how they would respond to Kate death?
IM PUNCHING THE WALL. ALRIGHT. warning for death and grief and mourning . . .
im gonna set this after she starts staying at the proxy cabin and becoming friends with more people, rather than rotting in the mines. im also imagining they find her body in the forest, nobody was there when she died.
tim and brian would have a heavy heart about it. sure, they had massive issues with her, but even by time shes 25+, they still kinda see her as a little kid. she was 14/15 when they met her, and she acted like a feral animal till she was like 17. brian got her a job on the farm, tim helped set up a room for her. they'd help toby set up a grave, but overall they dont go out of their way to mourn her - toby has that handled
which.....guides me towards toby... they've known eachother since they were 17-19, and they are like siblings. when she was in the mines, toby would always bring her food and even dragged a whole mattress there. thats his little sister (she is older than him..) and he had always been so so so protective of her. he loses his shit, screaming and throwing shit. is never home, spends so much time at the mines. chops down random ass trees just cuz he needs to exhaust himself enough to stop feeling so much pain. it feels like losing lyra again. he sets a grave up for her, puts her body in it, carves some stuff into a wooden cross he made from a tree he cut down, lays hella rocks all over. him and nina spend a good chunk of time together. nina has never seen him cry until this. eventually, after he's gone for days, he comes back to the cabin and just rots in his bed almost catatonic. clocky has to come collect him
whiiiiiiich now brings me to clocky. she'd find out from nina, since she'd already be in her own apartment by now and tobys not gonna tell her. she'd immediately get nina, get jack, go to the cabin, and try to console toby and nina the best she(and jack) can. has to learn to bite her tongue when tobys mouthing off cuz hes mad she's trying to help. she doesnt really have time to mourn kate at first, until maybe a week goes by and tobys finally eating again and clockys just sitting there and starts bawling cuz kate was her friend too and she had to immediately go into caretaker mode.
nina. screams and cries and needs to have people with her all the time, no matter what. she doesnt feel safe alone cuz she just wants to curl up and die so so so bad. she makes toby take her to the grave(he doesnt want to but he knows kate would be pissed if he wasnt at least a little nice to nina after this) and she just sobs. she holds toby and tries to be like 'its okay its okay its okay' but neither know who shes comforting. she'd print as many pictures she got of kate as possible (not a lot) and try to scrap book it and try to memorialize her like that. just hold photos and pictures and have them in her apartment and cry. give a photo to toby with a letter written on the back telling him how much kate loved him.
similar to if toby died, jack would try to host stuff. make dinner for them all, invite them over, give everyone space to eat and remember her. he'd go with toby to the grave as well, but he's less assertive with his care compared to clocky. less 'get the fuck up, this is making you feel worse' and more 'you know you can come over right? its not good to stay home alone'. toby would come to see him a lot, too. . .
toby would have to take on a lot of her patrols, so he'd bump into ann and lulu a lot. . . ann would tease him a bit like 'ooo is katey in trouble? whyre you here, handsome?', till he smacks the shit out of her w the handle of his hatchet and he grumbles something about her death. ann would shut up after. she'd be bummed out that kates dead cuz she liked her, but not mourn. lulu wouldn't be able to process it. ann would tell her, lulu would cry, then a day later she's asking when kate's coming to visit.
i dont think anyone else would really be impacted, though... jeff/dina didnt like her, she wasnt close with ben, never even spoke to jane or liu... lazari would cry and draw pictures of her, but she'd be okay shortly after, esp cuz jacks okay.
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reidhalstead · 2 months ago
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For: @anikabooker
There's a mountain in the distance, vibrating against the darkening horizon. Flashes of purple and navy ripple in a blur as Reid sprints — he's never fast enough here. Even as a bullet whizzes past his ear, he's too slow. Not enough, as a monster — as a hunter. A son, a brother. The peak of the mountain wobbles and teases him with getting closer. But every muscle in his person is burning, causing him to stumble; starving, weakened — feeling the rays of sunlight on paling flesh. He's convinced he can make it; he'll outrun those behind him; he'll make it to the mountain.
He doesn't recall why he's so adamant about surviving this. Somewhere in the rear of his mind he's sure to stop, spread his arms out — surrender to the end.
But he hears screaming; his sisters; an arm clawing out from the mountain. It's never been a mountain. A summit made of bodies bloodied and glowing in the rising sun. Reid calls out — he screams as his skin begins to burn — then, he watches as his sisters go up in flames; the mountain engulfed —
He bolts up, yelling out something incoherent into the void of his bedroom. Blankets askew on his waist, arms trembling with exhaustion as if he's run a marathon on nothing but fumes. His throat burns with more than hunger; he's been screaming.
Halstead curses the witch that has spelled him in his desperation to find a cure. In one attempt in the many years, he's been lumbered with nightmares; sleep a difficult to maintain luxury.
He can hear the thump, thump from another room. At first, in his shock and the afterburn of fear, he believes it to be a heartbeat; a consistent strike of something. But it's too loud, too sharp — it has the ceiling trembling.
He's reminded of the mountain he'll never get to in time, the family splayed in its formation, that he'll never save before he falls.
Reid throws the blankets from his lap, noticing the slick of cool sweat beading across his person; he's not sure about the science of it given his stasis. But as he attempts to stand, his knees cave. His mouth opens to release another whine of protest at the spasming of overused muscles. (Not a sob, he'll refuse to believe he's been bawling) So, as he often does, he slumps against the side of his bed and drags a knee upwards, hand brushing away the wetness on his face. He thinks of how useless he is here, when Lis is missing and how guilt sits atop regret; there's so much remorse about the previous night. He kicks himself of the many things he'd have changed, if he could. These are the worst nights; the ones where being utterly alone and awake is another kind of curse.
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abs0luteanarchy · 7 months ago
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dect cursed my fucking brain I can’t stop thinking about it like what if I started bawling hysterically ugly sobbing into my blankets screaming crying throwing up screaming more kills somebody heart attack
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beaker1636 · 1 year ago
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I'll Be Home For Christmas - Ricky Angst
AN: I am really proud of how this one came out, I genuinely love it! Thank you for the request @tearfallpixie ! I hope you enjoy it as much as I do!
“What do you mean that you won’t be here in time for Christmas?! This is why I didn’t want you to book a flight home on fucking Christmas eve?” 
You want to yell, to scream out your frustration and grief towards your boyfriend, who is telling you yet again that he is missing something important to you but instead you find yourself getting quieter, almost in a whisper as you fight back your tears from his news.
“You-you promised me that you would be home for Christmas after having to miss our anniversary, my birthday, Halloween, and Thanksgiving. Rick, you fucking promised me,” you mumble, lip trembling as you try to keep your tears back.
“I know I did baby, we’re all currently trying to figure out how to get home.  It’s not our fault that the flight was canceled, it just happens unfortunately.  In fact Chris is currently fighting with someone trying to figure out what the fuck we can all do to get home. Ryan, Vin, Chris and I were all booked on this flight and are stuck here.  I know I promised you to be back for your favorite holiday, I’m so fucking sorry and wish I could do more right now,” you can hear the remorse and frustration in his voice, that he was just as upset as you are.
You let out a sigh before responding, “It’s part of being with you, I have to accept that, I am working on accepting that, but it’s hard Rick it is really hard.”
“I know baby, I know.  At least we are taking time off after the holidays for our next album so I will be home for a while,” he says, sounding sad as well which just makes you feel worse.
“Yeah, I hope you make it home soon.  Rick, I’ve got to go, mom is calling me,” you say softly. “I love you.”
“I love you too baby, I’ll keep you updated,” he answers before hanging up.
Your mother isn't really calling, you just need to end the call before you say something that you will regret during your emotions at the time.  You have to take some time to think about what is going on in your mind before you speak about it, not wanting to take your frustrations out on your boyfriend. 
You make your way to your bed, laying down on his side before you give in, letting your tears finally escape your eyes as a couple sobs escape as it all finally hits you.  Grief from missing him so much the last couple months Anger because he is missing another important thing. Anger because he promised you and broke it. Frustration from spending your favorite holiday alone. But most important, and probably the hardest thing is the loneliness that you feel.  
Your anger winds up winning as everything runs through your head, angry at yourself for trusting his words when he has failed you before.  And angry at yourself because he failed at keeping his promise.
You groan in annoyance, getting up and finding yourself in your living room.  Glaring at all the decorations that are mocking you, at the tree you had to decorate yourself this year.  You let out a growl before you begin ripping all of the ornaments off the tree, crying and frustrated.  Letting a couple break as you drop them while throwing them in a bag so you can be rid of the thing.  When that is done you tear the tree back down, taking it and the ornaments back down into the basement.  You wind up taking everything down in a fury, pissed off and annoyed and hurt.  So fucking hurt, you debated going home with your family but he fucking promised you.
You thought taking everything down would make you feel better, because then you wouldn’t have to sit and look at them when you know you won’t enjoy your Christmas now.. But instead it has made everything feel more real, breaking your heart even more as you sit on the floor where your tree once stood bawling, questioning if your love for Rick will always be enough to get you through the loneliness and heartbreak that you feel so deep.
Meanwhile
Chris walks back to the group, looking a little less pissed off than he was when he went up to the poor lady working the desk, but also frustrated.
“Okay, I got somewhere with her, we may still have a chance at getting home.  The airline has a flight to Philadelphia that leaves in 6 hours out of an airport that is a 4 hour drive away and she was able to get the four of us on it.  So if we can get a rental car, drive to the other airport in time, take the flight we would land in Philly at about 2 in the morning and would all get home around 430 if we can get someone to meet us at that airport to drive us home.  So let’s all start calling all the rental car places around here and see if we can find one last minute on a holiday and make this happen,” Chris says, giving a hopeful smile to his bandmates and friends.
Rick lets out a sigh, praying to a god he doesn’t believe in that they can somehow make this happen and get home for Christmas before pulling out his phone and starting to make calls.
They have no luck and now 15 minutes later Ryan is calling the last place, all feeling defeated and awful when he finally has a breakthrough.
“I’ve got one, it’s a car so we will be cramped with all of us and our luggage but it’s better than nothing.  They are holding it for me so let’s get a taxi and get there before its too late,” he exclaims, getting up from his seat.
Everyone cheers, thankful that they finally found something that will work, hoping everything goes as planned and despite the fact they’ll all be exhausted they will finally be on their way.  Eventually getting to the rental place and now on their way, Ryan drives.
Everyone’s moods have lifted at the prospect that they may have pulled this off and be home in time to be with their families.
While sitting in the car headed towards the new airport Rick’s mind wanders towards you, he tried calling you but you didn’t answer him.  He hopes that you are alright, able to hear you trembling when you speak and it really hurts him to know that you were hurting, especially when he feels like it is all his fault. But the part that killed him the most, that broke his own heart was when you said that it was part of being with him, that you have to accept that.  He honestly hates that he puts you through that, it is hard on him but he knows it is worse on you because you are stuck at home alone when he is off.  You had moved away from your family for him, so you are truly alone and he feels awful that he might not even be there for you at the holidays.  He would do anything if he knew he could erase all your pain and grief, but he knows he can’t.
He hopes that you aren’t taking it too badly, that you will be happy when he surprises you in the morning.  He also selfishly hopes that you are sleeping when he arrives home, that you will wake up and find him in your bed and get the gift he knows that you want the most this year, himself.
Back To You
You find yourself sitting on the couch, feeling a little numb as you continue to look around the room at the emptiness.  You and Rick should be getting home from the airport about now and instead you are sitting here, waiting for him to arrive but knowing he probably won’t tonight, which brings you back to your sorrow. 
You had things all planned for tomorrow, knowing he would be tired and sleep in, you planned to make a big breakfast for him in bed with all his favorites, but not until later in the day.  The two of you would have a lazy day, watching movies curled up together before enjoying a nice dinner.  You had already picked up both his and your favorite Christmas movie from the store, had bought everything, hell you even got some new lingerie for that night once the two of you were relaxed and ready to ahem spend time together.  You had everything figured out for a nice holiday and now you are alone. 
Your mother even begged you to come home for the holiday and you said no because you wanted a nice time with Rick, being his first day home from tour and now you wasted what could be a nice trip home. 
You get a call from him but you don’t answer it, given the time you figure it is bad and that you’ll be disappointed all over again, plus you just don’t want to for a moment, needing this time to figure out what you want.
You finally give up, deciding that you want to go to bed and forget about everything.  You can deal with this tomorrow, maybe if you are lucky he will be home tomorrow night and it won’t be a complete waste of the day.
The Next Morning 
Rick finally arrives home around 5 in the morning, thanks to Vinny's mom who spent her night picking them up from the airport and giving everyone a ride to their houses.  He makes sure to give her a smile and huge hug as thanks before grabbing his bag and making his way up the walkway.  He lets out a huff, before trying his hardest to unlock the door quietly so that he doesn’t wake you up.  He stops in his tracks when he notices that there is no tree up, no decorations anymore, and he knows how much time you spent putting everything up.  You facetimed him the entire time to try and make him still feel like he had a part in it with you. He sighs in disappointment before making his way into the bedroom to be with you.
His heart breaks when he sees you sleeping on his side of the bed, holding his pillow to your chest. He can tell that you were crying, your eyes slightly red and puffy in your sleep.  He shuffles out of his jeans and shirt, quietly sliding on a pair of sweatpants to sleep in before laying down behind you and wrapping his arm around you, smiling when you instinctively roll over and nuzzle your face in his neck but not waking up.  
When you wake up around 9 you are confused at first, you can tell someone is holding you before you even open your eyes.  You shoot up, concerned that someone has broken in, or who knows what but then you notice it is Rick and can’t help the excited squeal that escapes your mouth.
You can’t believe he made it on time, he told you he wouldn’t and you thought you would be alone.  You just watch him sleep for a while, not wanting to move and risk waking him up because you know he had to have arrived late.  But also because you can’t believe that he is currently home, in bed with you.
He stirs after a while, slowly stretching before opening his eyes and looking at you where you lay curled up in his side.  Rather than speaking he moves some of your hair, which is a mess from sleeping, out of your face before leaning in and giving you a soft kiss, both of you lingering in the kiss, not wanting to separate after finally seeing you for the first time in a long time before he finally sleepily pulls away with a smile.
“Merry Christmas Y/N,” he says quietly, neither of you moving nor having the desire to.  He just gave you your favorite Christmas gift, himself, and you couldn’t be happier to be laying here with him, having a lazy morning.  It may not have been the big breakfast and everything you had originally planned but this?  This is better.
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sturniololuv08 · 1 day ago
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"Chris, What The Fuck!"
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(I will say this is the TW for RAPE)
"Anything?" That caught the man's attention. Chris nodded. "Well, Chris you know very well what we do here. Snake Eyes tells me you have been hanging around for a while." I turned my neck to look at Chris. How long could he have possibly been double-dealing? "Oh. You didn't know?" I realized my swift action brought the attention back to me. I made eye contact with the man in the suit.
"No," I mumbled. I wasn't sure if he wanted an answer, and I feared that if I spoke wrong, she would get hurt more. They have the impression that she means something to me. She does, just not what they are thinking.
"So that would mean -" He paused and took inventory of everyone in the room. "You are now rivals." I couldn't figure out his tone with his speech but it almost sounded like he was excited about it. Chris stood stern and I again fucked up. I was itching to make sure she was okay and  I glanced over at her. She was fine just being restrained and watching everything unfold. I knew she was smart enough to know when to lay low. My eyes glancing in her direction didn't go unnoticed. "And you... are drawn to... her." His finger showed where his words were moving to. I knew this tone. It was a scheming one. After a moment of daunting silence, I realized just how badly I fucked up. "Anything?" He asked walking up to Chris and me.
"Anything." Chris' voice was dripping with conviction.
"You want to prove your loyalty to The Reapers, you have to break off old ties." He looked at me and smiled wickedly. "Chris, you are going to break her." He pointed directly at her. The fear in her eyes was imminent. Breaking someone was one of the worst things anyone could go through. It was the process of gaining ownership over someone, getting them to listen to you by any means necessary. You could do anything and everything you wanted to do without any repercussions from anyone else in the gangs.
"No! You won't fucking touch her." I started struggling against Chris' grip.
"Yes sir." Chris didn't even hesitate.
"Chris, what the fuck!" I was let go and I took my chance to throw a fast crappy punch behind me. I missed and was scooped up by Snake Eyes. My eyes were starting to mist over and blur my vision. I watched Chris saunter over to grab her. She was fighting as hard as me to get free. Her friend was bawling filling the room with an undertone of constant sobs. "Chris, please!" I begged him. He ignored me and struggled to hold her arms behind her back. One of the thugs grabbed her kicking ankles and carried her away. "Chris!" I yelled again just hoping to get some sympathy from him. He finally turned to look at me and all he did was wink. "Fuck you! You fucking pussy ass bit -" I felt a rough connection to my mouth.
"While they have their fun we should too. Don't you think?" Snake eyes shoved me to the ground. My arms and legs were held down. He took off his hoodie to expose his snake-tattooed chest and arms. He wasted no time hovering over me and punching me as hard as he could for his enjoyment. I stopped struggling and felt the burning and tingling sensations fill my body from every strike in a new area.
"Please stop." She screamed loud enough for all of us to hear. I closed my eyes tightly. There was nothing I could do. "Chris, no -" Her voice was muffled.
"Fuck." I screamed out in mental agony.
"You gonna cry lil bitch?" He taunted me. Their number one was watching all of this with a huge smile on his face. He was getting some sick enjoyment out of all the chaos and strife.
"I'm the lil bitch but you can't fight me without having people holding me down." I challenged. He nodded at the people restraining me. I immediately wrapped my legs around his core and flipped him to the ground. I crawled on top of him and just started pounding my fists into his face. His hands stopped mine and he threw me to the ground above his head. I unfortunately had a small build so I didn't weigh a lot. I smashed into the ground and let out a grunt.
"You aren't going to win this kid." He wiped his lip with his thumb. I stood up wobbly. My left eye was almost completely swollen shut.
"Let's fucking find out." I was determined. Not for me, for her. I had to get this over with so I could get to her. I didn't even care to fight this guy. I wanted to fuck up Chris so bad though. I wanted to kill him. The snake guy lunged at me and we collided with more fists being thrown at each other. It felt like it was never going to end.
"Okay, that's enough." Their leader halted his right-hand man with only his words. I was grabbed and restrained quickly. My adrenaline was running out and I was starting to feel weak and limp in the goon's grip. Chris came back to join us in the main area.
"Good." Both their leader and I noticed his hair was disheveled. His clothes were messy with a few fresh crimson blood stains. I whimpered. I listened; I couldn't hear her anymore.
"Chris, I'd like to talk in the office." He motioned for his company.
"What should we do with them?" A random asked.
"Put them in holding until I can be bothered again." He waved his hand around not caring about us. I was held by two men as my feet dragged on the broken tile floor. I couldn't move. Everything hurt. I was tossed into a dark room. I didn't even bother trying to move. My muscles ached. My heart ached. My mind ached. I failed. I was a complete failure every time it mattered the most. I took shallow breaths in and out and stared up into the darkness. Part of me wanted to hold her and console her but the other part of me couldn't face her. I took it upon myself to be responsible for her safety and not only did I let her down, Chris of all people, was the one to hurt her.
"It's okay." I felt the words whispered on my neck. I was in the same room as her. I felt her hand slowly slide down my arm like needles and pins until she felt my hand. The skin was broken on my knuckles causing a slight sting from her dirt-covered hands being on them. She curled her fingers with mine. I succumbed to the feeling of ease she always brought me. My eyes closed and I let out a little sigh feeling her fingers squeeze mine slightly before releasing. I wasn't quite sure how but I just knew then that everything would be okay.
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burningfieldof-clover · 2 years ago
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leaving. echo x f!reader
Here is my first fic written for Star Wars.
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Warnings: SPOILERS FROM SEASON 2 EPISODE 8. THIS WILL BREAK YOUR HEART. Angst, established relationship, lots of raised voices, panic attack, fluffy maybe? The panic attack explained in the work below is a replication of my own panic attacks. Seriously my heart is broken and this is me venting.
word count: 2427
Echo’s off-the-wall choice suddenly throws your life off track. There wasn’t even a track to begin with.
Spoilers! You have been warned!
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“Best of luck, Echo.”
What? You looked up at Tech as he gave a small salute. 
Omega looked up at Echo, panic starting to set into her eyes. “Luck with what?” 
The world faded out around you, sounds made no vibrations and colors started to vanish. You tried to ground yourself, find something to bring you back to the present. The skyline was tilting. Your sight was dimming. Your legs were failing.
A jolt brought you back; Echo’s hand grabbed your upper arm and all senses came rushing back with a sharp whiplash.
“Cyar’ika, hey, hey hey hey, are you with me?” Echo fell with you to his knees as well, trying to balance you with his scomp link as well. 
Your eyes finally met his. His eyes were definitely showing the most concern, more concern than you’d ever recorded in them before. Your bottom lip twitched, making you realize your lips were parted.
Echo leaned downward and toward you, his head not quite level with yours but also not above it. His hand started to raise to your face to touch your cheek, but you instantly slapped it away. 
“Are you serious?” you muttered out. “You’re really trying to comfort me right now–when you made this–this–decision? Without considering me?!”
Echo sighed in defeat. “I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want you to–”
“Didn’t want me to what?” you exclaimed jumping to your feet and backstepping. “Is this really happening right now? You’re leaving the team–you’re leaving me?”
Echo’s brows furrowed. “Now listen here! I have a chance to help people! I have a chance to save my brothers! You want me to turn my back on them?!”
“No, I…” you trailed off, suddenly losing the anger and feeling the replaced emotion of fear. “Echo, I never, I mean–I don’t want that–”
“What do you want then? You should know better than anyone else my feelings here!” Echo’s chest was rising and falling quickly, his breathing so heavy and his expression the same scrunch you usually see in Hunter or Crosshair.
You were breathing fine… until now. You couldn’t find the oxygen to fill your lungs. You gasped in and out, increasing in speed rapidly. Echo’s entire demeanor changed. He recognized the panic setting into your body, and if he didn’t calm you soon you’d hyperventilate to unconsciousness. Tears fell from your eyes quicker than a faucet. Your nose was starting to turn a red color as it scrunched up on your face. You started sobbing between the gasps in your panic attack.
Echo approached you quickly and grabbed your left hand and placed it on your left ear, then his left hand on your right ear. “Mesh’la breathe, I’ve got you, just breathe with me. In and out, in and out.” You fell back to your knees. He knew putting pressure on your ears was one of your grounding techniques. Blocking out the sound of your own panic helped.
The hyperventilating breathing started to dull, but you were still bawling, nearly screaming trying to release the emotions.
“Echo, why? I’ll go with you. I’ll go with you!”
Echo sighed and moved his hand from covering your ear to touch your cheek, tilt your chin up. “I can’t let you come with us. It’s going to be dangerous.”
“Are you kriffing kidding me?” you sent sarcastic laughs through your sobs. “We put ourselves in danger every. Single. Day. Why is this different?”
He glanced down to where your hand fell into your lap. “Because… it’s only going to be Rex and I. When you’re with the boys,” he nodded toward the Marauder, “there are more eyes to watch you, more people that have your back.”
“Who is going to have yours?!” you cried out.
“Rex will. And the brothers we save along the way.”
The heels of your hands came up to your eyes and wiped some tears, wiped your nose. You were gross, you were raw. “You and I, we had each others’ back.” Hiccups were coming through your mouth now. “I covered you. I healed you.”
Echo was starting to form tears in his eyes. They haven’t fallen. “You’ll never know how much I love you for your role as a medic. As my technician. As my partner.” His last word cracked as the first tear was shed. “Mesh’la, you’re… you’re still so beautiful even when you cry.”
You threw a playful punch at his shoulder, reluctantly laughing. Echo chuckled too, a small glimmer of hope playing across his face.
Your sobs started to subside as Echo caressed your face and rubbed small lines with his thumb.
“So,” you whispered. “I can’t change your mind?”
Echo scoffed. “You could. You could talk me into anything. But I’m asking you to please honor me. Let me do this. I… It’s what… It's what Fives wanted to do. I couldn’t be there for my brother when he died. If I could even save just one of my brothers, I feel like he would smile upon me. He’d forgive me.”
Suddenly, you grabbed his face. “Darling, no, Fives never blamed you for anything. He loved you more and more each day, I just know it.”
“Thank you, cyare. You’ve always given me reasons to believe.”
Another bout of silence.
“You’ll come back, right?”
Echo pushed his forehead to yours a little too quickly. It could have felt uncomfortable, but you pushed back just as hard. “I promise I’ll come back to you. You have to promise to be there for me.”
While you both held each other's gaze like it was a staring contest in which the winner would be crowned the king, your pinky slowly raised into his peripherals. He linked his pinky with you quickly. You could feel a slight tremor in his hand.
“I promise,” you pouted.
Echo exhaled the weight of this situation. It wasn’t as heavy, it wasn’t gone, but it was manageable. A small smile played across his lips as they came closer to yours. You felt that smile form. Your breath caught in your chest. The butterflies hovered in your belly just like they always did when he was about to kiss you. The kisses were never quick. They always always had meaning. He has kissed you many times in your partnership and each one was new and felt like the first time everytime. 
His hand started to move through your hair and grabbed the back of your head so he could pull you into this deep kiss. Your tears fell silently, salting both pairs of lips as they clashed. Your arm rounded his neck and forced you both to stand on your knees and push your bodies together. Your other arm went under his to wrap around his back and dig your fingernails into his back through an opening in his armor. 
You both kissed as though if you ever stopped, you would perish. You couldn’t tell if Echo had let go of tears since your eyes were clamped closed. Tongues danced in the space created between your lips. His hand was tangling in your hair. Your fingertips were getting caught on snags on his blacks. The world began to disappear around you again, but in a good way. 
Echo could get lost at this moment. He was pouring his heart into this, his full attention, pulling every feeling and texture into his memory. He had no idea when he would see you again. He had even intention to return, no matter what. He would save his brothers, then save you.
You heard a silent yet desperate “I love you” whimpered into the kiss. The interaction started moving to cheeks, hungrilly to your neck and an attempt to do the same to him, but he stopped you, but not before kissing your forehead, your nose. You both pulled back to look at each other, breathing heavy and both tinted red. Your hands went to both sides of his face and your thumbs traced the pronounced cheekbones. 
“Echo, I love you. You do what you need to do, but you better come back to me. You comm me whenever it’s safe. I’ll keep our channel open, always.”
Echo grinned. “I know you will. I love you, mesh’la. I won’t let you down.” He rose to his feet, kissed the top of your head, then pulled you to your feet. “I wish I had time to show you, remind you of how special you are to me, how radiant you are.” He chuckled quietly. “Hell, if you and I ended up in that bunk right now, I wouldn’t be able to leave.”
You giggled. “I know, my love. I respect your desire. I know that you’ve been wanting to be a part of the bigger picture for a while.” Your forehead met his again while your hands grabbed his one hand. Both of you were tracing thumbs over the other’s. 
A silent pause. You felt the universe telling you that you needed to return to the ship. You needed to go be the medic to the most ridiculous, courageous, radical clones you’ve ever met. 
“Don’t forget me,” you whispered. 
Echo shook his head while still pressed against your forehead. You both had visions focused on the hands between you. “I’ll never forget you.”
You bit your lip, considering not even speaking the next thought: “Don’t forget what I feel like. Right now or in bed as we were last night.”
A small growl escaped from between his lips as a warning. “The same goes for you.” His hand broke free from the bind you had on it. He grabbed the back of your neck and forced your head to tilt upward with a small tug of your hair. “When I come home–” you let out a heated gasp at the word home “--whenever I’m able to stop kissing you–” he kissed one corner of your mouth “--all over–” he kissed the other side “--then I’ll remind you, just in case you forgot.”
Both of you laughed together briefly. You kissed his lips gingerly, then pulled away. 
“Come home soon,” you whispered, the tears beginning to form and fall again. 
There was nothing Echo could do to take those tears away. Your pain was valid. His was too. “Keep the light on for me.”
You both looked into each other's eyes, darting between each feature you could both drink in quickly. 
“I’ll see you soon,” you both said in unison. 
Echo grabbed your hand one last time, spun you in a circle and pointed your path toward the Marauder. You took slow, forced steps away from him, dreading the moment your hands parted. Your fingers hung on as long as they could, until his touch was gone. You looked over your shoulder as you kept walking away. His smile was the peace you needed, the last thing you wanted to see. 
You could tell you both were fighting the drive to go down your separate paths. You knew that this was how it needed to be, though. You needed to let him go, let him be the hero he’s been dreaming to be. He needed to let you go and care for his brothers and sister. He knew they would thrive under your care. 
You climbed the ramp to the Marauder and stopped at the top step. You turned around to look at him one last time. 
Echo gave a salute with his scomp link hand, and with a choked laugh, you returned the gesture albeit not as formal. You stepped back and pressed the button to draw the ramp upward. You had no idea you were holding your breath until the image of him disappeared. 
Tech leads the ship upward and off of the platform. You were still frozen to the spot you stood upon. The air and mood was stale, frantic, pressured. You had no idea how long you remained there, but when you turned around you first laid eyes on Wrecker and Omega. Each of them looked at you with sympathy. 
You waved your hand. “I’ll be okay. We all will be.”
Wrecker let out the breath he held. “You know it!”
Omega charged you and hugged your waist. She didn’t have any words since she was still processing her own feelings. 
Hunter entered the small area from the section of the ship that held the bunks. He pointed over his shoulder. “Echo left you something on your bed.”
Curiously you began heading that way. Pressing a button on the wall, the door to the bunks opened up. You couldn’t really see it from the doorway, so you approached your bed slowly as though you feared what you could find.
Your hands reached for the folded paper first. Unfolding it, you saw a quickly scrawled note.
I’ll always protect you, cyar’ika. 
A small smile showed up on your face. You heard Omega and Wrecker’s footsteps close in on the doorway. 
Placing the letter back down where it came from, your fingertips landed on the sheet that covered a large shape. You grabbed the thin fabric and pulled it away.
You broke into sobs again, probably not for the last time today. You were smiling despite crying so heavily. Your arms crossed so you could hug yourself. You knelt down to the ground. One of your hands caressed the set of armor that laid on your bed, but it remained atop of the shape of a handprint stamped in red against the color of black and white plastoid. 
Hunter’s voice spoke up from behind you. “He wanted you to have your own set of armor. He entrusted us to make sure you’re kept safe, so we grabbed what we could. I hope it fits.”
“Is this, is this his handprint?”
Hunter hummed in confirmation. 
At this point, Tech had the ship set to autopilot so he was able to join the crew. “I haven’t had a chance to quality check it, so when you try it–”
Tech was cut off by Wrecker’s hand over his mouth. Wrecker pointed at you with his eyes. Tech took the hint. 
Each of your teammates looked upon you. Your hand was still laid upon Echo’s handprint on your first ever set of armor.
Omega’s small hand touched your back. Hunter’s hand fell onto your shoulder. Tech’s landed on your other shoulder. Wrecker placed a hand on top of your head. 
It was then–you knew you and Echo would be okay.
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icycoldninja · 3 months ago
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Helloo, how have you been?
can I request Vergil daughter being a figure skater ?
She’s been skating since she was three, and been on competitions winning each time 1st place, though her winning streak comes to an end not being number one but this time number two and she’s really disappointed. She had a bit of an ego always being first that even being second it was like the end of her career. Especially when her father watches all her competitions. She doesn’t know how to handle someone else taking first place and starts throwing a tantrum, So Vergil comforts her.
Yes, I can do this, enjoy!
Second place (Dad!Vergil x Daughter!Figure skater!Reader PLATONIC)
Sitting in the front row, Vergil observed you gliding around effortlessly on the ice, feeling pride bloom in his chest as you elegantly swayed to and fro, the determination to win first place clear as day on your stone-cold features that you'd inherited from him.
It seemed like only yesterday when you were a little girl, stumbling around on the ice-skating rink, holding onto his hand for support. Now you were a full grown, elegant and beautiful young lady, goal-oriented, just like her father, but most importantly, MOTIVATED to win.
Vergil was beyond proud of you for having an unbreakable winning streak for so long, as any loving father would, but he didn't want you to become obsessed with fame and accomplishments, as he once was. You should be comfortable accepting second place, but for some reason, the mere thought of not winning that shiny gold metal made you red in the face. Your ego was spiraling out of control, it seemed, just like his once did.
After you finished your routine and the other skaters had finished theirs, Vergil found himself eagerly anticipating the results, though not as much as you. When it was announced that you'd received second place, Vergil was still so proud of you. You'd achieved a feat not many others could, and thought that you would be proud of yourself too, but he was wrong.
Once the cameras had been directed away from you, you stormed into your dressing room and began having a full blown temper tantrum, screaming, sobbing, throwing things and more. Thankfully you had calmed down substantially by the time Vergil found you, or he would have smacked you upside the head.
"Y/N, there you are," He mumbled, striding up to you and seeing you bawling into your hands. "Stop that, stop with those tears. Shh. Come here." Without even waiting for a reply, he pulled you close and held you tightly against his chest, rocking you back and forth like you were a baby again.
"I-I'm sorry, Dad," You sobbed. "I failed! I couldn't be number 1!"
"No, you did not," Vergil was quick to reassure you. "You did your best, tried your hardest, and managed to win second place. That is enough for me."
"But second place isn't really winning!" You protested, sadly.
"Yes, it is," Vergil told you, patting your head. "Second place is just as good as first place. Think of all the other competitors that arrived today. How many were there, do you remember? There were not just 3 or 4, there were many. You won second place, standing out amongst hundreds. You have won, sweetheart, there is nothing to be disappointed about."
These words were really all the comfort you needed, because you knew your dad was always right, and that his validation was all you needed. If second place was good enough for him, then it should be enough for you.
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