#screaming crying throwing up trying to edit this fic
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why is editing the worst part of writing. like what the fuck dude i already wrote it why do i have to suffer more???
#screaming crying throwing up trying to edit this fic#just. hhhhhhhhhhh.#i dont even know what im doing with it#i always get to this point where im like well noones actually gonna wanna read this so whats the point#but thats bullshit i know it is#and im mostly writing it for me anyway so it doesnt even matter#i dont have to edit it if i dont want to but i want to share it with people so argh#im just gonna check it over for typos and post the first two chapters#it's fine#it'll be fine#dont mind me therapizing myself in the tags#artie talks
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+ of organising all the writing projects in notion: I have an aesthetic todo list!
- of organising all the writing projects in notion: a have a fucking todo list and all my 12 unfinished project are staring in my soul
#ok most of those are translations#some of them are in the editing stage even#but 5 of those 12 are maxi fics in various stages of wip?#ehhhhhhh#and I want to update formatting on all the old fics because I finally googled how to css the indented 1st line of a paragraph#but I dont' want to apply it to all p tags in the workskin because it messes up fucking A/N#so I need to add new class to tags and it's annoying in case of multichapters#weeeeell to be finished in 10 years I guess?#and like logically i know i don't HAVE to finish all and every project in span of a few month hopefully I have my whole life to write fics#but then I see ppl screaming crying throwing up because the fic they're reading had no updates for 6 month and they declare the author dead#and here I am in the corner trying to complete something while the hobby focus circulated to the right spot#I know I vent too much about my fics but I moved websites and lack of feedback is driving me nuts but I'm not going back to ficbook N O P E
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ok I js followed but I was wondering if you could do a fic where your Billies partner and your in the front row and js says “c’mere y/n! Come up here babe!” Or smth like that and the fans go wild because the don’t know you two are dating. If so pls tag me in it🤍. love youuuuuu!!
౨ front row seat ৎ
authors note: HII BBY!! i literally love this idea so i just had to write this immediately it's literally so cute😭 I LOVE UU TOOO🤍
billie master & taglist // main masterlist
☆ the whole stadium sings along together to one of your girlfriends songs, and you join in, knowing every lyric from heart as you scream. she's walking on the stage right in front of you, and and you reach your hand out like a crazed-fangirl as you call out her name. billie continues to sing, not noticing you as she mistakes you for another fan and just waves, laughing to herself as she begins to jump around the stage some more.
you smile as you watch her make her way around the stage, waving at her fans and even blowing kisses to some lucky ones. you stare up at the big screens in adoration as you see her beautiful face, smiling as she hits every note perfectly. as she comes back to your side, you grab onto the metal rail that seperates the stage and the pit, screaming her name once again.
this time, she notices, and she almost stops singing as shock washes over her entire being. you told her you weren't gonna be able to make it, but somehow, your meeting got canceled, and you made it right on time. you waved again, this time mouthing, "i love you," as you watched her stare at you in awe.
the fans behind and around you are confused as to why she's staring at you in particular, but they just take it as an opportunity to try and get her attention, screaming and crying her name as they all wave. the girl on stage mouths, "i love you, too," and you giggle, knowing that there will be several fan edits of this exact moment.
when the song ends and billie finally gets to take a breather and chat with her fans, she runs back over to the side of the stage that you're in front of, crouching down and moving the microphone up to her mouth, "come up here, baby! y/n, c'mere, get up here with me."
the crowd begins to scream louder at the pet names she's throwing out, and you hear several fans behind you screaming both yours and billies names, "hey! can we get her up here?" she calls at the security guards standing in front of the stage, and they shrug, walking over to the rail and helping you get over.
as you get over, you quickly run up the stairs and jump into your girlfriends arms, moving back to press a kiss to her lips lovingly in front of the whole stadium. the crowd goes wild, jaws dropping left and right as the realization comes to them, "well, this is very random, i know. but this here, is my girlfriend of 1 year, y/n y/l/n."
in that moment, she doesn't care about the media and what they'll think. all she thinks about is how happy she is that you were able to show up and surprise her. she grabs your face with both hands, looking you in the eyes with the biggest smile before pressing her lips to yours in an affectionate kiss again.
"i love you so much." is all she mutters before pulling away, and the crowd gets even crazier as the microphone picks up that short sentence.
539 words !!
@mseilishmwah @devynscomet @mxqdii @sophlovesmeangirls @livialifesblog
@mulitfandomslvt
#billie eilish x fem!reader#billie eilish x you#billie eilish fanfiction#billie eilish x reader#billie eilish smut#billie eilish#billie eilish x y/n#billie eilish fluff#hit me hard and soft#hmhas#happier than ever#hte#when we all fall asleep where do we go#wwafawdwg#dont smile at me#billie eilish req ౨ৎ#amiyahs favs ౨ৎ#amiyahs asks!#answered !!
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Tear stained pillow case
Pairings- Drew Starkey x Fem!reader
Summary- reader is in a long distance relationship with Drew and the constant shipping of him with his cast mate (Odessa) and hate get to her.
Warnings- Angst, yelling, swearing, a smidge of domestic abuse, cheating.
A/n: to the anon who requested a sad Drew fic, I’m sorry this isn’t the best. I hope I kind of got what you were looking for but I need to work on my angst! Please send me a message when you read this xxx
“YOU, you can’t keep going on like this?!” You shouted; anger bled through your veins. You felt sick, the bile rising in your throat. “You’ve got to be fucking joking me!”.
The nerve of your boyfriend, he spends months away from home. Spends every waking minute with his co-star Odessa, he kisses his co-star off screen and he’s the one who can’t keep going on?!
“Yes Y/N” Drew begins to argue, you cut him off by throwing his pillow at him. He doesn't even flinch, his face screwed up in anger. “No Drew, I’m not fucking done” you yell, you look crazy.
You look like the crazy jealous girlfriend his fans had painted you out to be, and you had every right to be.
“You don’t get to put this shit on me Drew, YOU KISSED HER!”.
-Previously-
You couldn’t take it anymore; his face was all over your FYP. You were stupid enough to create a TikTok account, scrolling endlessly and searching the tags for your boyfriend Drew.
You knew what you would see, thirst traps and edits of him and his cast mate Odessa. Edits of the sex scenes they had to film, everyone shipping them together. You were trying to make yourself hurt, you sat there reading the comments. Reading the hateful things they said about you, the words cutting you like tiny knives.
Ugly
Not good enough for Drew
She’s not even famous
Fat
You were ugly crying at this point, unsure why you put yourself through the pain day in day out. Drew had told you a handful of times not to go searching for these things, to pretend like the fans didn’t exist.
But how could he expect you to pretend? He was famous and there was no hiding it. He had been away for 3 months now; you had a routine of face timing every night around 6pm, but tonight was different. He had an event. An event with Odessa.
“GOD Y/N! What are you doing?!” You shouted, staring up at the ceiling. You roughly rubbed your face, your mascara smearing under your eyes. The tears didn’t stop falling down your cheeks. “STOP!” You ordered yourself, but it only made it worse.
Hyperventilating at this stage, gripping the blankets under you. Pressing your face into the white pillowcase, you were pathetic. A pathetic mess. You were so glad Drew was 12 hours away, there was no chance he’d walk through the doors and see you right now.
You hated that you were being so jealous, you knew he loved you. He adored you. Whenever someone tries to hint at him and Odessa in interviews, he always mentions you, you’re all over his Instagram.
You had never met Odessa; you never had the opportunity to. You did think that meeting her might make you feel less jealous, seeing how they act together in person and not from stupid TikTok clips that were edited purely to make people think they were together.
Your phone ringing cuts your crying short, you sit up quickly and reached for your phone. Seeing his face flash on the screen had you nervous, your skin clammy and heart racing.
You wiped away as much mascara as possible and dimmed the bedside lamp, pressing answer on the screen. His smile appearing on your screen moments later, he was in dark room with a small yellow overhead light.
“Hi baby” he grinned; you could see the glimmer in his eyes. You wanted to burst out crying again but instead you dig your fingernails in your thigh and gave him a fake smile. “Hey baby” you whispered, worried your voice would be husky from all the screaming and crying.
“Why is it so dark?” He questioned, his eyes darting around the screen as though he was trying to look over your shoulder. You shrugged and moved to lay on your stomach. “Going to bed early” your voice cracked, and you quickly hid it behind a cough, you could see a shift in his face.
“What’s wrong babe?” He questions, his eyebrows crease together. He looks over his phone for a second and mouths ‘hold on’ and his eyes dart back to you on the screen. “Nothing, I’m okay. You need to go babe, we can talk later” you smile, brushing him off, you wanted to go back to your sob fess.
“Your lying” he states, his features have hardened. You know he doesn’t like it when you keep things from him, he likes you to be open about your feelings. But right now, you didn’t have the energy to discuss why you were spending your Saturday night crying in bed at 6pm.
“Babe, we can talk about it when your home” “No, tell me now”
“Drew!” His eyes dart over his phone again and he lets out an exasperated sigh, he runs his hand over his face and squeezes the bridge of him nose.
It’s as though you can see the tension building in his shoulder blades, you so badly wanted to be there to offer him comfort. You wanted to be the one to rub his shoulders and whisper ‘you got this’
“Okay, I’ve got to go. I’ll call you tomorrow”.
He ends the call without an I love you, that just sets you off again and you spend the next 2 hours crying your eyes out until you pass out against his pillow.
—-
When you awaken the next morning, you’ve rolled over onto Drew’s side of the bed. Squeezing his pillow tightly against your body. Breathing in his scent that barely lingered anymore.
“Such a loser” you mumble to yourself; you reach for your phone that’s hidden under the blankets.
No notifications
You let out a defeated sigh and make yourself get ready for the day; you had planned to clean the apartment. Drew would be home in a few days, and you wanted him to come home to some normality.
And that’s exactly how you spent your Sunday, cleaning and staying off your phone. It was much harder to do the latter, you were itching to call Drew.
You usually sent texts back and forth every day, sent a couple of pics and just tried not to go crazy without one another. You had hoped listening to music and keeping you busy would stop the incessant thoughts that were flying around your head.
But you found yourself battling with your thoughts more than listening to the music. By the time nightfall came you had scrubbed every corner of the apartment. You had lit a candle in the living room and taken a seat when your phone lit up, the music travelling through the empty room.
You answer, plastering a smile on your face. He gives you a soft smile, he’s dressed in a green button up. The button up you had brought him for his birthday, you loved that colour oh him.
“Hey babe” you both say at the same time, letting out a chuckle at the two of you being awkward around each other. “How are you?” You ask, eyes flickering around the screen.
You can’t see much from where he is sat, you can hear voices and assume he’s just got back from the poguelandia event. You don’t even realise he hasn’t answered, too focused on who’s voice you can hear so close to the phone.
That’s when you look back at him, he’s not even looking at the phone. He’s looking over it again, mourning something and rolling his eyes.
“Why are you acting strange?”
“I’m not?”
“Okay.. why do you keep looking over the phone?”
“Oh, just watching something”
I’m that moment you knew something was going on, Drew always gave you his undivided attention even when he was mad. You didn’t like this, it made you feel sick again.
You were so sick of feeling unwell and anxious. “I’m going to bed”
Drew nods his head and finally looks at you, you press the end call button. You didn’t want to look at his face, you didn’t want to hear his voice. You wouldn’t be able to handle not hearing I love you back. It was easier this way.
You don’t know why you do it, but you don’t go to bed. Instead, you go searching on tiktok again. And that’s where you see it, the videos from poguelandia.
How close he and Odessa are, the way she dances with him. The whispering, the walking close together. You knew it, you just needed confirmation. He liked her, he didn’t want to be with you anymore and that’s why he’s distancing himself.
The tears don’t come though, your body seems to go into denial. Your stomach still unsettled, and your mouth feels dry but you place your phone on the counter and stare at the wall.
- 2 days dater -
“Hey, babe” you’re aroused from sleep, somebody shaking your arms. You jump, gripping the blankets around your chest. “Oh, it’s you”.
“Don’t seem so happy to see me?”
You don’t answer him, instead you stare at him. He takes a seat at the edge of the bed; he smells like the cologne you had brought him for his birthday.
He showered and is dressed in jeans and an oversized white shirt, hair a little messy since he’s growing it out for a project. “I missed you” Drew smiles, it’s a fake smile. You can tell them apart now.
He moves to give you a kiss, but you press your palm to his shoulder, giving your head a small shake.
You’re not dressed for an argument, so you pull yourself to stand and grab an oversized shirt. Not really sure if it’s one of yours or Drew’s but it really didn’t matter at the time.
“What’s wrong babe?” He questions, pulling himself to stand. He towers over you, making you feel small. The tough exterior you had been working on, crumbling slowly.
“Stop calling me babe... just, tell me the truth Drew”.
You don’t even need to clarify what you’re talking about; he runs a palm down his face. He begins to pace the bedroom floor; you had hoped he would deny it.
“I knew it”.
“It was a kiss” Drew states, your heart breaks. You feel as though you can physically hear the cracking of your heart, the bile rises in your throat and the tears pierce your tear ducts begging to be released.
“W-what?” You whisper, your voice wobbles. Your hands shaking as you move to hold yourself against the desk chair. You needed stability or you’d fall to your knees.
“I kissed Odessa, the night of poguelandia”
Your nails carve deep crescent moons into the wooden chair, your chest rising and falling heavier as you try to calm yourself down.
You can’t let yourself fall apart in front of him, he didn’t deserve to see you crumble.
“What the fuck Drew?” You yell, but your voice cracks and you slam your palm over your mouth to stop the hysterics from starting.
Turning your body so you’re not looking at him as the tears cascade down the apples of your cheeks, biting harshly on the skin of your lip. The familiar metallic taste fill your senses.
“It meant nothing”
“FUCK OFF with it meant nothing, why did you do it then?!”
This just seems to set him off, igniting something inside of him that he’s been holding onto for a long time. He’s stepping towards you and you’re taking steps back.
You’re back meeting the wall as he towers over you once more, making you feel smaller than you were. “Because Y/N, you’ve been acting weird. You’ve been distant and quiet; you’ve been making me feel bad for having a career”.
His voice is low and threatening, his hand hits at the wall behind you. You push on his chest, making him stumble back slightly.
“No Drew, I would NEVER make you feel bad for your career choice. However, I would distance myself so that I wasn’t sitting at home crying over you every night, missing you. Wishing I was with you, do you know how hard it is for me?!” You cry, you poke at his chest with your pointer finger. His larger hand grabbing yours to stop you from doing it.
You fight against him until he drops your hand, and you step away from him, your cheeks burnt red with frustration.
“How hard you’ve got it? What about me Y/N? Why is it always about you? I’m the one having to leave, do you know how hard that is on me?”
You shake your head, of course he was turning this all back around to the two of your issues. Acting as though kissing Odessa was okay, that it was just something he needed to do to forget about the issue at home.
“Don’t, don’t bring up all this. You kissed another woman; this is on you. Yea we have problems, every couple does. Yeah, we all have it hard, doesn’t make it okay for you to kiss your co-star” you shout.
You grab your phone; you don’t know why you want to add fuel to the fire. You’re on tiktok before you can rationalise with your brain, the second you’re on the app. The videos are there waiting.
“You see the shit that I have to deal with, go on, watch it”.
You throw the phone across the bed, his eyes falling to the screen of the iPhone. The video loops over the two of them dancing and whispering at the event, you can see him swallow harshly.
“This is a fan editing videos- “Drew begins to argue, and you let out a grunt of frustration, running your hands through your messy bed head.
“I can’t keep going on like this”
“YOU, you can’t keep going on like this?!” You shouted; anger bled through your veins. You felt sick, the bile rising in your throat. “You’ve got to be fucking joking me!”.
The nerve of your boyfriend, he spends months away from home. Spends every waking minute with his co-star Odessa, he kisses his co-star off screen and he’s the one who can’t keep going on?!
“Yes Y/N” Drew begins to argue, you cut him off by throwing his pillow at him. He doesn't even flinch, his face screwed up in anger. “No Drew, I’m not fucking done” you yell, you look crazy.
You knew you looked like the crazy jealous girlfriend his fans had painted you out to be, and you had every right to be. Your boyfriend of three years had kissed someone who wasn’t you and it wasn’t for a movie.
“You don’t get to put this shit on me Drew, YOU KISSED HER!” You cry, you can’t stop the tears now. You’re hyperventilating again, pressing the palms of your hands into your eyes.
He’s stepping around the bed and pulling you against his chest, you want to fight against him. You want to tell him to get out of the apartment.
But you also want to beg him to stay, beg him to stop seeing Odessa. Beg him to start fresh with you, move on and be happy.
“This is the end, isn’t it?” He questions, you pull away from him slightly. Mascara pooling in your lower lashes, you probably should have washed that off before you went to bed.
“It has to be” you breath, tears begin to fall from his own eyes. This only makes you hysterical, sobbing into his chest as he holds you tighter. You don’t even want him to let go.
“I’ll always love you Y/N, I’ll always think about you when I walk past a bookstore or see those fancy chocolate donuts in the bakery down town” he whispers, his lips are pressed against your hair. His grip is tight around your body, he doesn’t want to let go either.
“I was lucky enough to love you, I’ll always remember that” You whisper, tears fall harder as you look at one another.
“Oh.. if we are doing the right thing, why does it hurt so much?”
“I don’t know”
His thumb wipes away the tears on your cheek, pressing his forehead to yours. You let him kiss you one last time. His lips are soft, and they feel like they always do, they were made for you.
“I should go... I’m so sorry Y/N, truly so sorry”.
You watch him leave, you wait for the front door to close and that’s when you let yourself fall. Knees meeting the hardwood floor, the draft from under the bedroom door kiss your toes. You let out a gut-wrenching sob, praying he would come back and fight.
Taglist- @novxturient @kookypogue111
Part 2
#drew starkey angst#drew starkey#drew starkey one shot#drew starkey x y/n#drew starkey smut#drew starkey x you#drew starkey fanfiction#drew starkey x reader#drew starkey fluff#drew starkey fic#rafe cameron imagine#rafe cameron fanfiction#rafe cameron fic#rafe cameron angst#rafe cameron smut#rafe cameron x y/n#outerbanks angst#outerbanks fanfiction#outerbanks cast#outerbanks drew
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*ੈ🌩️‧₊˚— the mystery of misery + katsuki bakugou, eijirou kirishima.
૮˶ᵕ ༝ᵕ˶ა synopsis — you’ve spent your whole life running from the shackles of your past and the misery surrounding it, but, after the death of your estranged mother— you return to your small hometown to lay her to rest. while you’re there, the whispers of whiteridge begin to unravel, revealing mysteries of love, loss and lies that all tie back to a childhood flame and the town’s recluse.
⭑ general warnings — please read + mdni ! heavy!angst, heavy!smut, fluff, happy ending, characters aged up to twenties, strangers/childhood friends to lovers, major character deaths, themes of death, injury descriptions (bones), murder mystery, childhood trauma, gaslighting, manipulation, arguments, fight scenes, anxiety, panic attacks, therapy, pet names (sweetheart, darling, baby etc.), fem!reader, southern!au, small town!au, quirkless!au.
⭑ smut warnings — three scenes, protected/unprotected sex, drunk sex, clothed sex, oral sex (m + f!receiving), blowjobs, handjobs, fingering (f!receiving), nipple play, body worship, dry humping, multiple orgasms, overstimulation, orgasm control, choking, biting, scratching, marking, threesomes, cucking, frottage, double vaginal penetration, squirting, creampies, possession, birth control, condom usage, aftercare, light!degradation, light!dumbification, light!dacryphilia, light!baby trapping, strength!kink, praise!kink, size!kink, spit!kink, uses of cunt, pussy, cock dick etc. reader is picked up/carried.
⭑ words — 51.1K.
⭑ notes — waah !! here it is !! my baby, my passion project. this fic is an accumulation of of a month of screaming, crying + throwing up but i'm so happy to give it to you all. i've never been so proud of something, it's a lot, its heavy but its very much me and indulgent. sorry in advance for the text walls/length but i hope you guys will love it as much as i do! special thanks to @yuki-no-akumu for all the support and editing and formatting!! and @heartdevil too ! m.list / playlist / ao3 ✩
some memories are easier to forget than others.
like scars, they can fade with time until they’re hardly noticeable— as if they were never even there to begin with. others cling to familiar scents and sights and sensations, etched into the landscape of your brain never to be erased, never to be replaced. no matter how hard you try, certain memories will always come back to you— close in on you like a shadow in the night, jolting you from your peaceful present day.
at least, that’s how you feel when you get a call from your hometown about your estranged mother’s sudden death— and all of those painful memories from your childhood you worked so hard to forget, constantly pushing them to the back of your mind come crashing down on you in a giant wave of stinging nostalgia. and you feel as though you're drowning in the weight of them.
as soon as you were old enough, and on the cusp of your eighteenth birthday— you’d abandoned your life in a small town in the south to make it big in the city. you wanted to write, wanted your name on big billboards and your books in every store, so you left it all behind as a naive young woman to follow a man who’d promised you a fruitful career and that all of your wildest dreams would come true. back then, you’d have done anything to get out of that tiny town.
and you did, though just barely breaking into your mid-twenties you made a name for yourself as a best-selling author of fiction books. known far and wide, you thought that your career was your way out, but you’d never thought that you’d be dragged back to the hellhole of your childhood hometown either. the place where people cursed your name instead of cheered it, where you were an outsider instead of someone to be loved.
the memories of your bitter mother and piece of shit father ( who’d abandoned you all very early on ) sit at the forefront of your mind as you make the long drive to your old southern home— you would only go back to sell your dead mother’s house, see to her funeral arrangements and be back to your new, better life in the city within the week. you couldn’t possibly stay any longer, you refused to.
except, the words of your publicist, mina ashido, serve as a haunting reminder that your plan isn’t just a quick in and out.
‘when you go on this trip and go back home, sit in your feelings. talk to the people you used to know! write something. something refreshing that your fans have never seen before.’
you remember the conversation as clear as day, after having received the news of your mother’s passing— your nosey publicist thought it would be a good idea to pester you to consider writing that autobiography. she’d told you that your fans wanted to know the real you, that you were too private for your own good and apparently your science fiction romance novels just weren’t cutting it anymore.
you scoff to yourself, alone in your rented jeep, cruising down mountainous dirt roads with nothing but dust and rocks kicked up by your tires, cold air and the clear sky above to keep you company. “the real me, my ass.” there was a reason that no one knew anything about you prior to who you are now. why your childhood memories were kept safely behind lock and key. no one needed to know the neglect you faced after your elder brother’s death, they could be spared the details on how your mother went bat-shit crazy trying to investigate his accident. what good would it do anyone to know how the town and its people turned against your mother when she couldn’t handle her duties, being too consumed with grief to help those that needed her?
to help you, when you needed her?
everyone in town hated her, and by extension, you.
what good of a story would a life like that make to your readers?
a sign for the town of whiteridge, population 356, comes into view— a little rustier than when you’d left it, and for a moment, you bring your car to a complete stop.
though the darkened memories of your past sink their claws into your mind, you take a deep breath and push forward— facing the demons that taunted you throughout your childhood, making them your bitch in your adulthood.
as it turns out, funerals are much harder to plan than expected.
the town’s coroner had already picked the date for said celebration of life ( a good riddance for you ), which settled on the day after you had arrived in lovely old whiteridge. there was much to organise in such little time.
dealing with the funeral director had been exhausting, picking colours and flower arrangements and headstone designs— you end up throwing a wad of cash at the coroner, too tired to deal with the matter or to care. you doubt that your mother would have spared enough of her attention to do the same for you if you’d swapped places with one another. in the end, you put down enough money to cover twice the budget for the funeral and after party and whatever wages will be needed by any staff involved at the director with a polite, yet strained smile.
whatever you need to give to put your mother in the ground and bury your past with her— you’ll give.
after more discussion, you come to find that the only condition the woman who raised you had for her death was that any celebration in her honour was to take place in your childhood home— the one with creaky floorboards and wailing walls that accompanied the symphony of your mother’s sobs each night. the funeral director had told you that, and again, you agreed to the condition without a care, paying off the decorators with your hard earned money ( not what your mother had left you or what was kept for her funeral arrangements ), telling them to get it sorted for the following day.
you couldn’t bear to deal with the house yourself, at least not yet, and decide to put yourself up in the town’s nicest hotel for one last night of peace.
the hotel is on the far side of whiteridge, by the town centre surrounded by warm looking diner’s and old rickety antique shops you remember being coated in fresh licks of paint as a child. the owners are a sweet couple, who sign you up to their cosiest room right away— the taller, momo, desperately trying to hold back on asking for your autograph while her partner, jirou, looks for your set of keys in the back behind their reception desk.
eyeing momo— taking in her round, soft cheeks, her gentle obsidian eyes and silken dark locks, you wonder how she ever survived a place like this looking so kind and hopeful and make a mental note to buy an extra copy of your latest novel from the gift shop later on, so you can leave her with a signed copy as a thank you for being so hospitable throughout your stay.
a mop of purple hair returns from the darkness, each one of jirou’s steps jingling with the set of keys dedicated to your space for the night. “you’ll wanna head ta room 205, it’s up the stairs ‘n to the right,” she explains nonchalantly, her southern twang ringing in your ears as she twirls the keychain over her perfectly manicured finger before pushing the set of keys across the desk towards you. “checkout is at noon, breakfast is served by sato from eight am sharp ‘till then.”
her hands settle onto her hips afterwards, returning to momo’s side— the picture perfect painting of a happy couple residing in this fucked up world. with a smile that barely reaches your eyes, you take the keys graciously and slip them into your coat pocket— fiddling with them before you speak. “is it possible for me to get a later checkout, or leave my luggage somewhere safe?” casting your gaze around the hotel’s reception, you click your tongue before looking back at the pair with a smirk. “got a funeral first thing tomorrow morning,”
both women soften at your words, but your grin remains— not faltering at the expression of sympathy that flashes across their features. “oh goodness! of course! we can keep your bags locked up back here until you’re ready to get them,” the words rush out of momo, quick to correct their blunder before she elbow’s jirou— who gazes up at her in a gleeful mix of shock and irritation.
it makes you laugh, how natural they are with one another— like a married couple with their own special ticks and love language. nothing like what you saw around whiteridge growing up. they fuel a small fire of inspiration in the back of your mind, characters for your next book forming from nothing in your imagination but then you suddenly remember that you have an autobiography to write while being here— not a means to escape reality. your face sags at the thought.
“‘m sorry for your loss,” jirou hums quietly. “may i ask who it was?”
adjusting your posture, your hand forms a fist around the keys in your pocket— the cool silver metal cutting into the soft skin of your palm.
“my mother,” you give her name, letting out an amused chuff as recognition takes its place on the couple’s faces. you shrug next. “and don’t be.” bringing a single finger to your lips, you make them wordlessly promise not to say anything. not to leak your little secret to anyone outside of this town.
the world beyond whiteridge knows nothing of your family and the person you were before you left your town. not only that, but ashido would quite literally kick the bucket too if she found out your mother’s death had spread to the wider internet. it was a secret, the goldmine and key to your autobiography’s success. the chilly outside calls to you through a blue and red stained glass window— the yellow street lamps just shining through, accompanied by happy shouts from residents in the town. the sights and sounds lure you out of your own stuffy thoughts and taunting memories. you feel like you’re holding your breath, that you’re suffocating in the pressures of trying to live up to and prove yourself to your mom even though she’s stone cold and long gone.
twirling on your feet, you face the happy couple and plant your hands on the front desk eagerly. “i’m dying for a drink,” you blurt out brightly and try not to laugh at your awful choice of words. the tone of your voice carries something much more chipper to what it was mere seconds ago— shocking the hotel owners standing before you. “any recommendations? i haven't been to whiteridge in years!”
jirou hesitantly lifts her finger to the window that had beckoned to you earlier— seemingly pointing to a busy joint just across the street. “liquid gold bar, s’owned by a friend of mine. used to be the town’s chapel ‘fore it got burned down a few years back by a couple of highschool grads,” she says fondly, as if remembering something happy. “i may or may not have been one of ‘em. they’ve moved further out now. but if ya do go to the bar, tell kaminari we said hello.”
you both share a wicked grin at the story— laughing between each other while momo only scolds her partner lightly. they can’t be much older than yourself, meaning the chapel had burned down just after you’d finished highschool as well. ironic, you think.
“they do a great roast as well! if you’re hungry for dinner while you’re over there!” the ravenette beside jirou chips in, offering you a warm smile.
thanking them both, you muster up a genuine smile of your own before asking for a pen and some paper— which momo is quick to shove at you. satisfaction flits through your body as your signature glides easily across the bit of scrap that she’d given you ( which you’re pretty sure is a receipt for their maintenance bill ). you step back after pushing it across towards her, nodding in acknowledgement.
“thank you both for your help. i’ll be sure to find a copy of one of my books so i can give you a proper signature as thanks. have a great night.”
you take your leave after that, gathering your bags and suitcase in your arms as you trot up the stairs. you can hear the excited squeal and kisses that follow your departure, momo blabbing on about your parting gift, her fondness of your works accompanied by jirou’s gentle and exasperated ‘i know, momo’ and ‘calm down or i’ll kiss you!'. you can only grin once you reach the landing, glad that at least some positivity has manifested in this wretched town.
the atmosphere of liquid gold is buzzing.
after setting up in your room, showering and switching into something clean and comfortable— you head over to the bar and restaurant per jirou and momo’s recommendation. upon entering the establishment, you can already feel the life burning bright in every single corner of the room. it’s not busy, but people from every walk of life, people you don’t recognise from your awful childhood seem to be having fun. you feel safe here, free from the tendrils of trauma whiteridge usually had clinging to you.
you arrive at the bar in a few short strides, tugging the sleeves of your old woollen sweater over your hands, not bothering to flag down the bartender as you enjoy the animated and rustling atmosphere you’re currently surrounded in.
“yer not from around here, are ya?” an electric blonde appears before you, startling you from the peace and quiet of your mind. he notices you jump, a smile breaking out across his chirpy looking face as he pours you a shot of brown liquor and passes it to you.
folding your arms against the top of the bar, you quirk a brow before knocking back the shot with ease— the alcohol leaving a comfortable burn in the back of your throat. one that doesn’t hurt to feel, like the burn of hearing your mother’s name again when the solicitor called to tell you the news of her death. “what makes you say that?” slamming the glass down against the smooth sweet-cherry countertop, you lick your lips, and hum at the taste of dark rum coating them.
the chipper blonde gives you a look from his place behind the bar, amber orbs dragging up and down your frame as he gestures to…well, all of you. “for starters, you’re at the hottest spot in town dressed like yer about to join a seniors knitting class!” he starts, topping you up with another shot as you lean over to get a better look at him. he’s pretty, with wild hair and bright eyes and a cheeky aura about him— someone way too positive for a town that haunts your nightmares. “and second, yer just too pretty for a town like this.”
scoffing, you roll your eyes and look away. “could say the same about you,” you say to yourself— a little too quiet for him to hear before downing your second shot of the night. “thanks, but i was actually born at the hospital just up the street.”
“no kiddin’! me too!” the blonde seems giddy at the news that you, a stranger, has shared with him.
“aren’t we all…” you mumble back, blinking slow as the alcohol steadily begins to simmer through your body in the heat of the blood flowing in your veins.
“you don’t have the accent either,” he comments.
“skipped town at eighteen ‘n dropped it t’get where i needed to be in the industry i work in.” you fire back, locking your gaze with the bartender who seems thoroughly impressed by your ability to bring back the southern twang on command.
“i hear that,” the bartender looks you over, gesturing to the bottles of water behind him in concern and nods when you shake your head, gripping the bar. he’s fast to set you up with a third shot of rum, hesitant to give it to you. “so what brings ya back? tourism can’t be it.”
you swallow the rum, satisfied with how it calms your raging mind and temporarily eats up any anxieties you might have about the funeral tomorrow.
“dead mother.”
your companion reaches under the bar with a handful of black polished nails to grab a bigger glass for you— pouring you a heavier drink and a shot for himself. “bummer…” he laughs, as if understanding why you’re drinking tonight and lifts his shot glass to cheers with you. you share his laughter, already feeling lighter and clink your glass against his. “‘m denki kaminari, the owner of this joint, so if ya need anything, just holler at me, okay?”
with that, denki backs off to go tend to his other customers and gives you a sweet salute as you wave him off. “i-i will!” you hiccup cheerily. “oh! jirou and momo say hi!”
tapping your nails against the cool surface of your glass, you try not to think about the loneliness creeping up on you and the dread you have for the funeral. though, you’re somewhat relieved to let go of the woman who took away your childhood and failed to raise you in favour of digging deep into your older brother’s accident, in turn letting you be swallowed by the hate from the people in town. there was dread— fear for confronting your demons, the townspeople who failed you and the alcohol could only numb that for such little time.
“can i get a drink, please?” someone rasps and the sound of a chair scraping against the floor next to you pulls you from your thoughts for the second time that night— but you don’t bother to look up, wanting to be alone. and like denki had said, you’re pretty. it’s not uncommon for you to get hit on in a place like this.
tracing the rim of your glass, an irritated sigh leaves your lips as you take another sip of the dark liquid filling it. “before you ask, i’m not interested, but thanks anyway,” you reply smoothly, voice lowered by the alcohol clinging to the ridges of your throat.
the voice speaks pipes up again, this time sounding as though it’s directed at you. “‘nd i wasn’t fuckin’ talkin’ to you, sweetheart,” only then do you spare a glance at the person speaking— his voice husky, lower than yours and filtering through your ears like liquid gold honey. “but thanks for the clarification anyways.”
oh fuck.
you pause, meeting a pair of narrowed ruby red eyes, deep and enticing— calling to you like riches call to a man of greed. once you look up, you can’t tear your own eyes away, pulled into the trance of the handsome man before you. his hair looks like it’s been touched by only the brightest days of sunlight, a soft pale blonde that just barely covers his eyes. his skin is golden despite the cool and bone chilling weather outside— dotted with honeycomb freckles that remind you of stars in the sky. his lashes are long, long enough to make you insanely jealous of how pretty they are and your mind dares you to think about how soft they must feel when brushing against your skin.
you can tell that the man is strapping from the way his arms bulge and how broad his chest is, barely hidden by the fabric of his black turtleneck that stretches over his bulky frame. he seems familiar, but blurred from your memory— as if you knew him but weren’t supposed to.
he also looks like he was made by the gods.
like he’s the love interest that's walked straight out of one of your most famous books.
“don’t they teach you outsiders that it’s rude t’fuckin’ stare?” the stranger asks, a brow raised into his hairline as he accepts a drink from an amused denki.
shaking your head in surprise at being called out, you splutter out a response. “an outsider?”
“yer clearly not from around here.”
“you’re the second person who’s told me that tonight. what’s your reason?”
raising his drink to you, ice clinking against the sides of the glass, he utters simply. “firstly, ya don’t have an accent, sweetheart.”
rolling your eyes again, you swivel in your seat to fully face the handsome and apparently— all knowing, yet unknown person with an unimpressed glare. “let me guess,” leaning an elbow on the bar top, you bat your lashes at him and push your arms together to mockingly accentuate your chest. “i’m too pretty to be from ‘round here too.” you add in a faux dumb tone, scoffing when he falls for your trick to take a glance at your tits from over your sweater. “unbelievable.”
“was gonna say ya just give off the vibe that yer uptight, but that too.”
“uptight?” you gasp incredulously and if looks could kill, this man would be six feet under. “you don’t even know me.”
“know enough to know you don’t give a fuck ‘bout yer mom dyin’ or… at least you pretend not to. yeah i heard that.” he mumbles and takes a sip of his cool beverage, swirling it around the tempered glass before locking eyes with you again. “but then again, who am i ta judge? if she was from this shitty town, then that old hag was probably a pain in the fuckin’ ass jus’ like the rest of ‘em, hah?”
he looks to you as if reading your face, but you don’t have it in you to tell him that he’s wrong— so you laugh and raise your half empty glass to him. “right on the money…” you trail off, hoping to get his name.
“bakugou.”
“bakugou…” you repeat his last name, playing with the taste of it on your tongue, happy with it. “the people in this place are fake as shit.”
he grins in response. “they’re all bullshit, i’d rather avoid these fuckers as if they had the plague.”
you grin back. “cheers to that then.”
“cheers to bein’ the only sane people in this god-awful town,” bakugou holds his glass up to yours, cheers-ing with you before you both down your drinks in one smooth shot. when he looks back at you, you softly give him your own name, buzzing with newfound confidence as the alcohol once again takes up residence in your bloodstream.
“can i get’cha another drink, bakugou?” you ask, flagging denki over with a wave of your dainty fingers. “my tab’s already open.”
“i won’t say no t’that, sweetheart. start me off easy, yeah? don’t wanna get too drunk before i get ta know ya.”
now, that shocks you. someone interested in you for more than just your books and your money, someone who seems not to know you like the rest of the world does…or even this town. you tilt your head, intrigued by bakugou and speak softly to him again. “you wanna get to know me?”
“no one hates this place as much as i do, people like us gotta stick together.” the pale blonde with the dauntingly beautiful vermillion stare; smirks— exposing a row of sharpened pearly whites that make your heart stutter in its place residing in your chest. “’sides, i meant what i said earlier. i think yer pretty.” his smirk turns dopey, a coy smile crossing his perfectly slanted lips, sending your brain into some kind of frenzy. bakugou leans in real close, having turned to face you fully as well, and lets his hand slide over your jean clad knee— further and further until it settles on the swell of your thigh, giving it a hearty squeeze.
walking your fingers up bakugou’s own thigh, you drop your tone into a sultry. “yeah? you’re not so bad yourself.” you coo, twirling your fingers through his belt loops and tugging on them shyly. though there aren’t many people in the bar, you feel like the temperature of the room is rising— scorching you from the inside out. maybe it’s his touch, maybe it’s how close you both are, but it’s almost as if bakugou is swallowing you whole, pulling you into his air of mystery.
“not bad, hah? don’t act like i didn’t catch ya starin’, sweetheart.” he responds darkly, cocking his head to the side.
your hands travel upwards, fisting the fabric of his turtleneck as you follow the tilt of bakugou’s head. “god, you have something to say for everything, don’t you?” there’s nothing but an inch of air separating you both, your lips ghosting over one another.
“‘course i do, s’cause i never lose.” he whispers softly, his breath warm and wet against your cupid’s bow before bakugou closes the gap— pressing his lips against yours in a slow, alcohol and lust driven kiss. you briefly seize up, before letting the man lead you further into the dark. bakugou’s tongue drags over the seam of your lips, tasting the rum that’s caught on the chapped skin of them. he groans deep, the sound vibrating through you and straight down to the heat between your thighs— making you uncomfortable in your denim jeans.
you tug him close, desperate for more, for something else— but kaminari comes over, waving his rag about the place until both you and bakugou part.
“hey! hey now! get a room! you’re scaring away the customers!”
“can it, dunce face!” bakugou grumbles at the loss of contact but keeps a hand on your thigh to keep you in place while you calm your breath. “what customers?"
“um, rude!”
“‘nd s’not even like that anyways,” the lighter blonde continues, grabbing his coat and subsequently pulling his hand from your thigh— making you whimper at the loss of his warmth.
grabbing onto his sleeve before bakugou can vacate the bar, you pout, giving him your best doe eyes and pleading voice. “it can be…like that if you want.” you say breathlessly, not quite ready for your evening with the handsome stranger to end just yet. “i’ve got a room at the hotel across the street for tonight.”
and then bakugou gives you the same, slow sexy smirk from earlier and steps in between your thighs.
“yeah? then show me the way, princess.”
that’s how you end up slamming bakugou against the door of your hotel room— roughing him up between sloppy, spit swapping kisses. your hands cascade down the blonde’s well built frame, feeling his chiselled and washboard abs from over the thick fabric of his clothing, squeezing the meat of his pecs and tugging on his belt loops— hardly giving the man any room between your sensual lip locks. bakugou groans into your temperate mouth, following each movement of your lips like it’s a perilous siren song calling to him, like he can’t bare to be without your tongue crawling across his, both pink muscles dancing in a salaciously sinful song too debauched to happen between two complete strangers.
his lips feel so good, they’re soft and plump— balmier than you expected them to be for someone who seems so rough on the exterior. they move with calculated precision, not too rough, yet hungry enough to make you feel wanted and elicit a light blaze in your lower stomach, right between the plushness of your thighs. though you’re the one who has bakugou pinned against the maple wood door behind you, he’s the one that controls the flame of your desire— poking at it until it roars bright and orange, scalding you from the inside out as he pushes a thick, muscled thigh between your legs and making sure it’s snug against your clothed cunt through your jeans.
though he kisses you in a way you’d described as unhurried, cushiony and ductile, bakugou’s hands cup the maturing curve of your face between calloused fingers to tilt it upwards so he can pour more of his passion into you— enough to fill you to the brim as though to replace your soul with his own and leave you with a piece of him. his fingertips feel scarred with memories not quite sure you want to know the history of, fluidly sinking downwards until they cup the scope of your neck, dragging against your smooth unmarred flesh before finding purchase in your pesky clothes— tugging you closer to him to kiss you more, tease you more with his thigh grinding painfully slow into your aroused core.
you can’t be any closer to a man you’ve only just met, noses becoming neighbours with how frequently they bump against one another between your sticky lip locks and the blaze in the base of two sets of lungs whenever either of you come up for air. your chests expand with every ragged breath you take and the more your lips touch and tongues glide over chapped surfaces before meeting in the middle. alcohol clouds your judgement, should you really be doing this? your dread and fear of the day to come simmering on the stove into something more raunchy and taboo— a one night stand the day before your mother is due to meet the ground and possibly her maker. maybe you’re a little sick for that.
bakugou’s tongue feels like a new weight in your mouth, damn near down your throat but in a sexy way— drooling against your own, his spit shining against your chin as your makeout becomes nastier, sloppier and his thigh tenses up beneath every swirl of your hips down on him. there’s some sort of hunger, a growing and untamed appetite you have for one another, showing only the worst intentions for the rest of your night.
“fuckin’…take it off—“ bakugou grunts, restless and hot under his collar. his pupils dilate until they’re filled with a menacing shade of obsidian black that’s diluted with the red in his eye. you can tell that he wants you, his touch searing straight through the layers of thick winter clothes you have on, scorching the mark of his fingertips against the fat at your hips while he plays with a loose thread on your sweater. “wanna fuckin’ see what’cha hidin’ sweetheart,” he adds in a disguised plea, letting you pull back only slightly so you can shrug of the top layer of clothing until you’re bare to the predator’s stare. admiring the view, bakugou drags a digit up the softness of your tummy, pinging your laced bra against your skin once he reaches the valley between your breasts and exhaling deep at the sight of them bouncing for him.
a muscled arm circles your waist until you’re flush against bakugou’s bulky frame, hearts beating in sync, eyes fluttering across one another’s features illuminated by the shy sparkle of the moon peeking through the curtains and right into your room. bakugou’s skin sparkles under the silver light. his mouth is on yours again within a matter of seconds, a light blush panting his cheeks and the bridge if your nose all the while, his tongue licks into your mouth with insatiable wanton, the tip of it curling around the strings of saliva that connect the roof of your mouth to the pink muscle below.
it’s all to sedate himself, satisfy his raging ravenousness while the sweetness of your mouth drips onto his palette, making him go cross eyed and a throaty moan echo between you both.
all this from kissing a woman he just met— from kissing you.
the situation is insanely absurd, not even close to bakugou’s regular style, but he can’t help but feel enticed by the way you nip at his bottom lip and run your fingers through his blonde locks from their roots to their ends, fisting them when he lets out a breathless chuckle against your open mouth and flexes his thigh against your jean-clad pussy once again. it’s only then that you seize the opportunity— pushing the stronger, well-built man up against the door once more with some force before you quickly sink to your knees beneath him. your eyes shimmer, your mind clouded over and your lips wet and parted— you’re a fallen angel for sure, a walking temptation for bakugou himself.
he’s not a man strong enough to resist.
the descent upon bakugou’s body, one seemingly built by the highest of gods and carved out of ingenious rock, had been too quick for him to notice. and now, the sight of you on your knees for him has him embarrassingly hot all over. he’s burning bright like molten lava as you make quick work of his snake-skin looking belt and push his jeans down with his boxers in one swift motion. your fingers twirl the soft tufts of blonde hair forming a happy trail, lips twisted into a giddy, wet smile as it leads you down to his cock.
you press scorching kisses to bakugou’s pelvis, tracing your name against his golden skin with the tip of your tongue and grab at his tight ass with your eager hands, nails digging into the flesh until he snarls down at you.
“fuckin’ hell sweetheart,” he laughs through the thickness of ardour caught in the ridges of his throat. “fuck me, yer an animal.” bakugou manages through stuttered breaths. he runs a hand through his mussed and sweaty locks, staring down at you with a wolfish grin as he does so.
mirroring his expression, you toy with the elastic waistband of his boxers and hum in content when his entire body tenses up. “what? did you think i was just gonna roll over and take it? you must not know girls from the city.”
you can barely remember the journey back up to your room, both of you taking staggered and exaggerated steps across the slippery cobblestone surface of the whiteridge plaza, fuelled by sex crazed hormones and the thirty-five percent alcohol drinks pumping through your systems. the pair of you had stumbled up the stairs, curious hands slipping between layers of clothes and laughter. the sight of bakugou trembling above you makes the judgemental stares jirou and momo had given you completely worth it.
you’d failed to notice that their sights were set on the blonde and not you.
after making yourself comfortable—your tongue twists at his skin just above the button of his jeans, tasting the salt on him, sucking a cute little pink mark there so bakugou leaves here tonight with the memory of you and the best head he’ll ever get in his life. you’re almost ashamed to admit how fast your thighs squish and squeeze together as you peel back the fabric and reveal bakugou’s cock to your greedy gaze— you drink in the sight of him, heavy as his length thuds against his tummy due to the weight of it. his tip shines under the moonlight with a thin layer of white which only indicates just how turned on the blonde stranger is.
the rest of him is thick— mouthwatering— and you can feel saliva pooling on the palette of your tongue as you run your fingertips up the blue-ish, purple-ish forked veins that prettily decorate the man’s shaft and his balls sit heavy with cum.
the drooling only gets worse when you take hold of bakugou’s cock, feeling it twitch to life beneath your fingertips— your hand dwarfed by his size. you can only imagine the deliciousness of the stretch you’ll experience when he takes you later, you don’t think you can wait either.
“c’mon princess,” bakugou grumbles, his voice carnivorous and eyes intense as you squeeze him lightly between smaller-than-his fingers. his broad chest rises and falls rapidly, face twisting in a salacious mix of pain and pleasure with every teasing pump you give his cock. “f-fuckin’ put that pretty mouth t’good use, yeah? since ya got s’much to— fuck… t’fuckin’ say…” your thumb just grazes the leaky slit running across the centre of his bulbous, blistering tip, and the plumpness of your lips trace over each pulsating vein that’s wrapped carefully around his length as if they’re a perfect bow on the perfect present just for you. “open wide, sweetheart.”
you hardly know this man, but in the time you’ve spent together it’s easy to tell that he’s far from a patient one. bakugou is a go getter, he gets what he wants, when he wants and by whatever means— so he thrusts up, hurting his gooey-cockhead against the seam of your lips, glossing them up with a salty-sweet layer of precum. he flinches at the contact and his head falls back against the door with a dull thump, bakugou fighting back a timbre moan when your grip on him tightens and you palm starts to stroke him at a steady pace— slickening up the centre of your hand.
experimentally, you kitten lick his tip and your own eyes flutter at the taste of him— it’s addictive, drugging you up with an agonisingly amatory desire. “no one’s ever made you wait, have they?” you ask, voice dripping dangerously with arousal before taking bakugou deep into the wet cavern of your mouth— the spark residing in his blood red eyes tells you that you’re right, but you have little time to focus on his answer now that you have the heavy weight of his cock sitting against your writhing pink tongue. your own eyes flutter at the feeling, drool pooling in your mouth like an erotically hot flash flood. you’re completely full, feeling as if the blonde is halfway down your throat already— and that very idea only makes you crave more.
you want all of what bakugou has to offer, content with how he pushes further into your mouth until his balls sit on your chin and precum oozes in thick waves against your tastebuds. “oh fuck…yer tight. shit, sweetheart,” he curses from above you, his brawny arm thrown over his face as it burns bright with heat— bakugou draws his hips back while panting, hands fisted at his sides as he barely escapes the clutches of your needy little mouth so he can give you room to breathe. he swears he might cum when he hears you gargling. “can’t wait to see ya fuckin’ cry fer this cock. g’nna make y’such a pretty mess…”
missing his dick inside your mouth, you lean forward, pawing at his spit-slicked erection like a desperate little puppy— flicking your wrist in quick movements as you glare up at him. “then stop interruptin’ me and let me suck yer fuckin’ cock.” you say breathlessly, with a twinge of your old accent before sucking your one night-stand down again. his angry, sticky cockhead bulges against the inside of your cheek, sensitive slit rubbing along the soft epidermis there, only making him shudder until his back and slender waist arch away from the door.
bobbing your head, you waste no time in working up a pace fast enough to have the blonde above you melting like putty in your hands— you fist what doesn’t fit, the movement of your soft palms guided by the copious amounts of precum that leaks onto your tongue, that you spit out onto bakugou’s shaft only to slurp back up and repeat the process.
you breathe harshly through your nose, hollowing your cheeks as your nails sink deep into bakugou’s toned, beefy and jean-covered thighs to steady yourself before the plunge— they twitch beneath your grip and his hands slowly make their way to the back of your head. with erogenous doe eyes full of delirium you push down on the blonde’s cock, letting it hit the back of your throat while you’re forced to gag on him— nose pressed into the fluff of his happy trail.
“that’s it pretty girl, so fuckin’ pretty takin’ me like this, look s’good with my dick down that slutty throat,” bakugou drawls, his accent layered thick on top of his praise makes your own essence soak the crotch of your panties, makes your head dizzy too— though that may be because of the lack of oxygen you’re getting, struggling to breathe around the fat cock plugging your drooling mouth.
both of you keep still, letting your jaw go slack around him. one second you’re nursing on his precum, giggling around him and the next bakugou is fucking your throat until it bulges, using it as his own personal fleshlight. a frothy mix of spit and pre dribbles down your chin— his balls slapping against them with every weighty thrust of the blonde’s hips.
you grip those same swollen balls, rolling them between your soft fingers, breaking bakugou’s mind. all the while, he throws his head back, deep and throaty whimpers escaping his lips that he has caught between a row of pearly white teeth.
bakugou’s hips roll languidly into the addictive heat of your mouth, dopamine sparking in small explosions across his brain. he thrusts again, and again, and again— his pupils dilated like a rabid animal while his gaze hones in on the way your tight little throat takes him over and over. he doesn’t know how he’ll cope after tonight, if he’ll be able to survive without your greedy mouth happily sucking on his dick.
sweat beads in fat droplets against bakugou’s hairline, soaking through his sweater before he lets you go to breathe— watching you slowly pull off his cock with arousal glossed lips, coughing as oxygen fills your lungs and your chest heaves. “what’s the matter?” you chuckle once you’ve regained composure, going back to making out with the sloppy tip of bakugou’s girth. “can’t keep up?”
your hook-up laughs back, using the hem of his shirt to wipe his brow before shrugging it off. within seconds, he’s cupping the roundness of your face and his rough thumbs are digging deep into your soft cheeks.
“oh. i could go all fuckin’ night, sweetheart, whether you make me cum or not, ‘m gonna make sure i fuck that dirty lil’pussy ‘till you forget how t’walk.”
bakugou slurs in his heavy southern accent like it’s a promise, grabbing your tiny hand ( at least compared to his calloused one ) and guiding it into a fist around his achey, creamy cock. staying haunched over you, he finds your lips— tugging the bottom one away from you with his teeth before capturing you fully in a searing, messy kiss. he simpers at the taste of himself on you, mixed with the sweat sitting on your cupid’s bow.
he laps at your mouth, cupping the back of your head to deepen the lip lock— both of you moaning like fools into one another’s mouths and swallowing your raunchy song of laments and whines. the tune is only accompanied by the slick, dewy sounds of your hand jerking bakugou off. his hips continue to ram forward, never letting up their aberrant and urgent rhythm— fuelled by your hook-up’s innate need to cum.
“shit— ‘m right there… ‘m right fuckin’ there, sweetheart,” he pants against your tongue avidly, losing pieces of himself to you as you palm him faster and faster— the lewd mix of your drool and his arousal slinging from his cockhead to your knuckles. “gonna fuckin’ cum… g-g’nna fuckin’ cum!”
you work at him for a few seconds longer, kissing his red-hot tip every time it peeks through your closed fist and using your other hand to circle the seat of your palm against it, too.
he leaks ungodly amounts of arousal the closer you take him to orgasm, the world seconds away from crumbling around bakugou’s crimson gaze. “gimme that cum,” you say lowly, voice dipping. “want all of it.” you command, causing the dam to break and bakugou to finally hit his high. strings of his hot, viscous seed spurt from his sore, ravaged cock, painting your tongue, face and chest in his possessive shade of white.
“holy…holy fuckin’—shit!” bakugou cries out, and you don’t slow your fist around him until he’s done cumming, catching any smaller spurts of his orgasm with your eager tongue— looking up at your hook up with a smile as bright as the moon when he finally stops trembling and starts coming back down to earth.
though there’s static ringing in his ears and bakugou’s legs are beyond weak thanks to the life shattering head you’d given him— he still finds the strength within himself to haul you up from your knees and push you back until you hit the plush bed on the other side of the room. you squeal, bouncing in the sheets and pillows, but can’t help the streak of excitement that runs through you when you catch the darkened expression on bakugou’s handsome features as he looks down at you splayed out for him.
“t-take…take off those fuckin’ jeans ‘n let me get at that cunt, s’my turn now, sweetheart.”
you do as you’re told, unbuttoning the denim that suddenly feels a little too tight around your waist and kick your jeans off before bakugou cages you in against the bed— two sturdy arms stay planted firmly either side of your head.
the scent of flowers mixed with cotton that was embedded into the sheets is quickly replaced with the heavy musk of sex and caramel, which radiates off of bakugou in strong waves as he swoops down for another kiss. it’s softer than before, more fluid as his hot fingertips push their limits and explore what hides beneath the underwire of your bra. the blonde gropes at your plush mounds of flesh, twisting a nipple between a thumb and forefinger and leaves a trail of burning kisses down your neck— chuckling darkly at your shoulder when a feather-light gasp escapes you.
“b-bakugou,” you murmur needily, arching your back on instinct while he moves to unclip your bra with practised ease. “bakugou, please.” you add, all other logical words wasted on you as he encapsulates your pebbled nipple in his mouth and runs his tongue over it in smooth, wet circles. the mattress dips beside you from where bakugou’s shifted his weight to lie on his side to your right. tufts of sand blonde hair tickle your skin only causing goosebumps to rise against it in a ripple effect.
“hmm?” comes his lazy reply, the man still lapping at your heaving chest, all while sucking pretty marks against your tits that you know will feel tender to the touch in the morning. he only looks up at you when he switches, leaving one fleshy mound covered in saliva in favour for tending to the other. “try moanin’ my name. that’ll get my attention, sweetheart.” bakugou knows exactly what you want, what you crave for next— leaving you teetering on the edge of insanity with his hand smoothing over your tummy. it’s destination beyond the little bow on the hem of your mismatched panties.
pouting, you let your hips rise from the sheets only to have them forcibly pushed back down. “you’ve told me your name,” you say in an exasperated cry that has built up in the back of your throat. “it’s baku—“
“katsuki…s’katsuki when yer moanin’ pretty f’me, baby.” bakugou— katsuki— cuts you off, pressing his thumb into the crotch of your underwear to get a feel for how wet you are. “fuck, yer soaked. y’get this wet from suckin’ a stranger's cock, hah?” you almost hate that him teasing you only serves to turn you on more, your tight little hole gushing and clenching around nothing. the blonde grins at the whimpers you let out through gritted teeth, carefully tracing the letters of his name into your swelling clit.
reaching down, you grip katsuki’s wrist to keep him in place, locked between your thighs— as if he might choose to pull away from your honeyed cunt at your next words. “f-fuck you.”
“fuck me, baby?” he coos to you condescendingly, his teeth sinking into the shell of your ear. “don’t think yer pussy can handle that just yet, need’a stretch her open first.” the blonde pulls your trembling, doughy thighs apart until his palm can fully cup your sex— already so sticky and warm for him even through the thin layer of fabric. bakugou growls in satisfaction, yanking your panties to the side and watching with perverted crimson eyes as your slick ties the material to your dripping mound.
“please katsuki!” you try again, wailing like a petulant child for something…anything to relieve you of the unbearable heat twisting knots of ecstasy in your lower belly.
he tsks in response, pushing his lips into mocking pout as if to console a baby. “a’ight, a’ight…calm down sweetheart. y’want my fingers? wanna feel good?” the blonde says airily as he eases a single finger past your fluttering entrance, curling it immediately against your molten ichorous insides. lust lodges itself into your throat, a silent scream on the seam of your lips while you reach out for something to hold, to bring you back down from cloud nine.
your fingernails take residence in the pure white sheets beneath your writhing body and with your other hand, make a home for themselves in katsuki’s bulging biceps as he starts to finger you. they break crescent moons against sunshine skin, not hard enough to draw blood but enough to leave a reminder of your night with him.
he pushes in another digit alongside the first, slipping into you with a little resistance from just how thick they are. marvelling at the sensation of you rippling around him, of how hot your inner walls feel, bakugou curls his fingers once again— causing lewd, squelching sounds to reverberate in the air between your sweat-slicked bodies.
his dull fingertips brush against pleasure spots inside you that you didn’t even know existed, silver tears blessed by the moon starting to clump in your lashes, threatening to spill over at any moment.
“yer so fuckin’ sensitive,” your hook up muses outloud ruthlessly. he forgets that he’s being mean, too entranced by the way your cute little sex sucks him in— tries so hard to stop his fingers from pulling out. “this fucked up from grindin’ against my thigh? from a couple of fingers? ‘ve barely even touched ya.” he’s forced to grind the seat of his palm against your puffy clit, helping your tight hole ease up just enough for him to pull his fingers back with your sweet juices running down his wrist before he pumps them forward— sending you into a fit of squeals.
your brain actually lags, failing to register katsuki’s rapid and ravaging movements between your thighs that send your manuka honey mess flying up his arm and across your skin. he has your eyes rolling back into the abyss of your skull, your legs locking around his wrist and trapping him in place so that he can send you to the high heavens of electrifying pleasure over and over again.
he’s reduced you to a puddle against the bed, all moans and hiccuped sobs and begs for mercy. you can’t breathe, can’t feel anything as bakugou continues his erotic assault on your ravaged pussy— searching for that one spot inside you that he knows will shut your brain off for good. “d’awh, that’s it baby, look at that pretty pussy— she likes gettin’ finger fucked like this. i can fuckin’ tell,” he rambles, a man lost in the sight of your arousal spewing out of your spasming hole in small streams every time he thrusts his fingers into you. “you spread your legs like this fer every man you meet?”
shaking your head, you can’t help the pathetic yowl that tumbles from your cherry-bitten lips when katsuki pins your hips to the ruined duvet— stopping you from chasing the blinding ecstasy he dangles in front of you like a carrot for a working horse.
“n-nuh..n-no.”
“no?” your hook up smiles, pearly whites on display. you’re so cute underneath him, letting him stroke your enticing, sopping insides into the shape of him— preparing you to take him later on. the way you twitch and stir against the sheets with your mouth so full of saliva and your tongue rolling out over the plumpness of your lips. you’re such a fucking mess, but it pleases katsuki to no end. to have a stranger this fucked up and all for him.
“just the ones with blonde hair ‘n red eyes that say just what’cha like to hear, hah?” your feedback is nonexistent aside from your useless babbles that katsuki swallows, losing his battle in the urge to kiss you once again. he burns right through you, frying your nerve endings and neurons carrying logical thought across your brain.
instead, katsuki fills you like an overflowing glass with pure, unadulterated bliss— forcing it into your bloodstream like alcohol, poisoning your veins with a slow stack of pleasure. building the stairs to your high. letting your lips go, he leans down to spit onto your pulsing mound, rubbing the frothy mix of your shared saliva into your budding pleasure nub, making you open up for him like a blooming flower even though it’s the middle of winter.
your mind is still blank when the blonde speaks again, only grabbing your attention with a sharp slap to the cunt. “can’t even fuckin’ answer me that’s how much of a messy slut you are.” katsuki snarls mean, but angles his hand just right to press sweetly against your g-spot, grinning when your face crumples at the new pressure.
“‘m going to cum, katsuki.” you tell him earnestly, squeezing his bicep at the same time your cunt squeezes down on his fingers— practically falling apart on them.
tilting his head to the side, katsuki speeds up the unrelenting pace of his digits thrusting in and out of you— pressing encouraging smooches to your shoulder as he watches you lose the fight to your high. “c’mon then, can feel ya clenchin’ around my fingers. make a mess on ‘em, sweetheart. so i can fuck ya nice ‘n proper after.” and your body follows his raspy command, reaching your orgasm with a high pitched and borderline pornographic moan, squirting hard right up katsuki’s arm and virtually forcing him out of you with how much leaks from your pulsating gushing cunt.
katsuki gives you a second to calm down, nosing at your neck while your breathing slows and you feel ready enough to keep going. “can you take another?” he asks you huskily, slipping his fingers into his mouth with a moan— tasting your nectar on him.
“i thought you said you were g’nna fuck me. good ‘n proper?” you slur, old accent slipping through when you finally open your eyes to look at him. bakugou shines all while smirking down at you, the crown of sweat on his head illuminated by the moonlight— giving him the appearance of an angel. maybe you’ve scored lucky tonight, comforted by the presence of your own angel after the loss of your mother. maybe that’s fucked up too, but you push the thought to the back of your mind— reaching up to soft blonde locks and tug him down for a wet, encouraging kiss.
“a’ight, roll over baby. ass up, i’ll give ya what’cha want.” bakugou grunts smugly, tracing your hips as you roll onto your tummy and tuck your face into the pillows. “you know how fuckin’ gorgeous you are? your body…s’perfect,” he grabs handfuls of your ass, pulling your cheeks apart slowly as threads of your arousal drip between them. “y’want a condom? ‘m clean, but i wanna make sure yer comfortable.”
casting a sultry glance over your shoulder, you debate the choice. while you’re sure katsuki would feel amazing raw, you know for a fact your publicist would chew your head off for possibly getting pregnant and or sick from fucking a stranger before a funeral. so you decide to be smart, for once, and give him a nod.
“gonna need a verbal response, sweetheart.”
rolling your hips back until your ass pushes back against his growing erection. “a condom, please, katsuki.”
he pats your bottom once, watching it jiggle proudly before reaching into his back pocket for a silver packet and shrugging off the rest of his jeans. sharp teeth sink into the curve of your behind, accompanied by sloppy kisses at the dimple of your spine and right up to your shoulder blades. “so you do follow orders…good girl,” he simpers, tearing the condom open with his piercing canines before rolling it onto his pulsing girth in one fluid motion.
it’s not long before bakugou finds himself at your neck again, the knife-like edges of his teeth sinking into your neck while he lets you adjust to the weight of his body caging you in against the sheets. “you ready f’me, baby? ‘m gonna give you my cock now. wanna make sure you can take it.” he interrogates you lightly, searching the sex tainted air in the room for your consent, brushing his lips along your neckline and shoulders patiently.
“y-yeah. can take it, katsuki,” you stutter and rest your head back against his shoulder, bowing your body into his with a pleasingly fuzzy mind. grunting in approval, bakugou uses his knee to part you by the soiled meat of your thighs and spread you open for him again— manhandling you until you’re positioned in a way he likes.
grabbing hold of his dripping dick, katsuki runs his shaft through the length of your quivering pussy lips, grinding it against the heartbeat in your clit and tapping your clenched hole a few times before he whines needily at the sticky and indecent sounds your sexes make when they slot together perfectly.
you’re so wet, oozing at every chance you get, breathing hot and heavy as the blonde slips his mushroomed tip past your tight entrance— he snickers smugly at how well you take him and so fast, clamping down on katsuki as if never to let him go. he rocks his hips experimentally, testing your sensitivity and how badly you want him by fucking you with only the tip at first— taking at you when you whine.
pushing back onto him, pleading with your body for more— you sigh desperately. “don’t tease, bakugou…”
“s’katsuki,” bakugou cups your throat as he corrects you, giving it a reassuring squeeze as his nose nudges the side of your head. “hold on f’me baby, doin’ such a good job. waitin’ to be fucked. have a little patience, will ya?” he rasps, taunting you as he thrusts all the way in, hips flush against your fleshy ass and bottoming out inside the warmth of your crying cunt. he sticks a thumb in your mouth to pacify your cloying cries— letting you suck on it as he pushes your arched back down onto the sheets and relishes in the warmth of your sloppy, syrupy walls wrapped around his painfully bricked up shaft.
and while he loves the feeling— katsuki finds it within himself to pull back from your selfish and darling little hole to set a sensual, deep-hitting tempo, dragging his seedy latex covered tip along your ribbed walls and pleasure spots. he rolls his hips like a rushing river, making sure that they hit so deep you feel him stirring up your guts.
the sheer force of his thrusts already have the headboard bouncing off of the wall, tearing crybaby-like and pitiful yelps from between your cherry-bitten and tear stained lips. katsuki takes rein over your body like a barbarian brute claiming occupied land, ruling over what little thought runs through your mind. your hands take purchase in the poor pillows bellow you— the ones that swallow your gluttonous screams while you’re fucked to the moon and back, stars dotting your tear lined vision.
mind blanking, there’s hardly anything left for you to do except take what you’re given while bakugou takes you from behind— moulding your insides into his shape with every wild and feverish buck of his hips into yours. “f-fuck, katsuki. m-more, need it!” you squeal hungrily, succumbing to his intensity as you throw your sticky ass back onto him in your best attempt to match his rhythm. squeezing around every pulsing vein that decorates his fat, milky cock while it pushes and pulls at your gummy walls with lewd squelches, bakugou nudges your g-spot over and over again. “god, fuck…you’re so deep.”
“yer such a greedy girl, so eager to get fucked by the first man who calls ya pretty.” katsuki moans condescendingly, thrusting his thumb past your lips in perfect harmony with his dick plunging into your tight hole. using his free hand, the blonde grabs at your ass and spreads your slicked up cheeks apart— working himself further into your heat, stretching you open for him and him alone.
“love the way you feel around me, sweetheart, how you suck me in.” the praise relieves any anxiety that rattled through your body before— a lustful haze fogging your mind so you don’t have to think for yourself for once. it’s like bakugou knows the pain whiteridge has caused you, knows what it’s like to be forced away from what you love and written behind his rough touches is a sense of sympathy.
you hate the feeling of sympathy, but crave the numb mind you know that sex with katsuki bakugou can give you— even if that makes you a self-centred brat. “actually you’re the second to have—oh fuck!” you choke on the tail end of your words as bakugou lands a sharp spank against your bottom, a different kind of pain blooming under the skin there. it makes you drip nastily, juices running down bakugou’s length until it practically bathes his balls as they clap against the curve of your ass, heavy and full of a brand new load of cum just for you, ruining the sheets and blankets in turn.
the way he fucks you is hard, pounding you into the mattress which spring’s squeak for dear life. katsuki ravages you like he loves you— though he hardly knows you…but you feel his vulnerability, what you’re sure you’d see in the red hues of his eyes if you were on your back instead.
“‘m always gonna be first, baby,” bakugou growls like a feral animal, pressing his body hotly against yours until his chest is to your sweaty back, hardly peeling away from you. greed, anguish and yearning spark within you both, their explosions compressed between your bodies as they move in sync— skin meeting skin, slapping throughout the hotel room.
“the first person y’think about when you touch yerself after this, first dick you’ll imagine when you’re gettin’ fucked by any person after me—“ the blonde’s voice is tight, stuck on the ridges of his throat as he pounds away at your creamy pussy, just brushing against your cervix in a way that has you howling at the moon. your core locks and unlocks around the curve of his dick, choking precum out of katsuki, fat drops of it beading at his sensitive slit— making him falter for only a second.” r’member sweetheart, i. never. fucking. lose.”
katsuki punctuates each of his words with lunges of his hips forward, practically forcing you up the bed since you wobble weakly on your hands and knees. you’re sure that by now your nails have torn holes in the linen below from how much you’ve gripped and scratched at them— but the amount couldn’t even begin to compare to how much of his precum smears along the inside of the condom, which slides against your wrecked insides, juices drooling down your thighs in a honeyed, viscous and gooey mess each time bakugou jackhammers into you. “you’re s’fuckin’ filthy,” he drawls, red stare laser focused on where your bodies meet. “remind me, sweetheart, who’s makin’ you such a fuckin’ mess?”
“y-you!” you babble brainlessly, somehow finding the strength to reach behind you to grab at straw blonde hair— forcing katsuki back onto his haunches while you bring him down for an uncoordinated kiss. you mewl happily at the taste of salt on his cupid’s bow and shift onto your knees as well. he grins, licking impressed curse words into your mouth as he gets the idea— a singular arm of his curling around the fat at your waist to support you as you bounce back onto his thick cock. “you make me a mess, katsuki, only you.” you mumble against his swollen lips, spewing the lust blown words against his strawberry tongue and memorising the taste of sex in his mouth while he fumbles around your connected bodies to toy with your pleasure nub.
appeased by your hands lost in his hair and your pussy working itself down on him, sucking him in like magic— katsuki rewards you with a pinch to your clit and a barrage of love bites along the column of your throat, grinning wicked at the ocean deep purples and blues begin to blossom underneath your skin. “wanna see you cum f’me like this, stuff you full. y’deserve it, baby. fer grindin’ this cute lil’ cunt down on me.” he wants it, so bad— you can tell by the way he pulses to life inside of you, drives his dick upwards to chase the sweltering heat of your mound and your arousal every time you pull off of him only to slam back down.
bakugou pushes his creamy cock deep, deeper, as far as it can go until your back arches away from the safety of his chest and your lips part in loud, open mouthed moans— all with the hope of sending you over the edge, to make sure he stays true to his word and has you hooked on the way he fucks for weeks and weeks on end. “god, you make me wanna lose it.”
you’ll remember nothing else but the shape of him, once you’re out of this hell hole.
and neither of you can tell who wants that more.
vulnerability trickles into the air, intertwining with the heartache that neither of you dare to voice but anchors you both down to the same shitty town. bakugou changes the angle of his hips, grinding it so that his bulbous cockhead never lets up on that one special spot inside of you— sending shocks of serotonin, dopamine and other happy sex hormones from your brain straight to the tips of your toes. they curl and your fingers clench, pulling on katsuki’s hair so hard that it lulls a desperate bleat out of him while his freehand brushes over your nipples in a weak attempt to drag you towards your high.
his lashes tickle your shoulders as he buries his face against you, praises and curses drenching your skin— alternating between little nips here and there. neither of you seem to care when bakugou breaks skin, your blood on his lips. “a-are you close?” you simper, tears of lust dotting your lashes as he slams his cock into your tight hole over and over again. “‘m sorry…don’t think i can—oh shit— hold it, ka’suki!”
he nods his head at your question, eyes screwed shut while you gush all about the place. “cum f’me, let go. don’t need’ya t’hold on, sweetheart,” he moans to you through gritted teeth, rolling your clit between a finger and thumb, grinding his tip into your pleasure spot. “‘m right behind ya…oh fuck! there we go,” he squeezes your swollen nub once, cooing to you through a chuckle as white flashes behind your eyes and the damn finally breaks— release trickling from your body in clear streams. bakugou swallows the scream of his name that rips through you, holding you tight through the aftershocks of your high before he follows you over the edge.
you’re still twitching when he pulls out of you and shoves you face first into the bed— tearing off the condom to jerk himself off over you, hot stripes of his seed landing against your back, potent and milky before exhaustion settles into his bones and katsuki collapses to the right of you once again.
the pair of you lay there, together in a comfortable silence as you catch your breaths, neither of you having the brain capacity to speak just yet. you roll over to face the blonde stranger, not sure if your night together solicits the comfort you crave after being fucked stupid. “c’mere,” bakugou says tiredly, though his eyes are still closed. “can feel you starin’ at me… ‘nd contrary to your first thoughts on me from the bar, ‘m not entirely an asshole.” he cracks one eye open to look at you expectantly— lifting an arm up so you can snuggle into his chest.
you take the chance before he can change his mind, settling against katsuki sleepily. “you might not be an asshole but you fuck like one,” you laugh into his skin, feeling his chest rise and fall with yours. “which is a good thing, by the way.”
“i’d hope so. i didn’t wreck yer shit only t’get called a terrible fuck.” katsuki smirks. “where’s my thanks, by the way?”
“you can have the free hotel soaps ‘nd first dibs on the shower in the morning, that good enough for you, blondie?” you shoot back, fighting back the sleep beginning to creep up on you.
it’s a fight worth losing though, for bakugou makes sure to pull enough blankets over you both for a good night’s sleep, barely hanging on himself.
“ya got’cha self a deal, sweetheart.” is the last thing you hear him say, before drifting off to sleep.
you wake up the next day with a steady pound against the inside of your skull, the world spinning as if someone has grabbed you by the head and shaken up your brain— like a never ending rollercoaster with enough twists and loops to make you want to spew out your guts. it’s still dark outside, from what you can tell, and winter’s grasp on the early morning sky is as strong as ever, fighting off the sun’s need to rise.
in the inky abyss of your hotel room, you shift around the bed in search for your phone— finding it plugged in and fully charged on the nightstand next to you…though you don’t remember doing so last night. there’s a few emails from mina asking you if you arrived safely, some tweets from fans playfully complaining about the cliffhanger ending of your last book and one message from the funeral director with a few details about today’s plans.
funeral director at 6:29 AM - the procession starts at 8:30 AM sharp! ceremony will last until 3:50 PM taking place at ‘the freedom’ chapel with any celebration taking place at your old residence at—
clicking your phone shut, you don’t bother to read the rest of the text and stare blankly at yourself on its screen. she, your reflection, looks back at you tiredly, mascara clumped in your lashes and panda circles around your eyes— you feel a little greasy, feel exhaustion in your bones like weights have been tied to you only to pull you down.
she did this to you, the person who was supposed to raise you, left you a hollow mess and a void of emotion who couldn’t feel a single thing towards her death except for fear or anxiety.
your mother.
turning on the bedside lamp, you’re immediately met with the sight with a note, orange juice and an array of medications to combat your raging hangover— a piece of bakugou left with you after your whirlwind of a night together. you pop the pills and swallow the juice with a twitch of your face at how bitter it tastes after being so freshly squeezed, and through the clarity of your glass you spot your freshly pressed clothes across the room for the funeral. a simple black, sleek jumpsuit and matching blazer. crisp and hanging from the wardrobe.
a kind gesture from a man you hardly knew, spoke volumes compared to what you’d been shown as a child.
it wasn’t anything close to the love you needed, but it was the kindness that you deserved all along.
you don’t go down for breakfast, with barely two hours to get ready and be on your way. showering off the grit, grime and sex from the night before and slip into your clothes— into someone new. a woman who’s meant to miss her mother and not the woman who had been forced to grow up fast and raise herself. by the time you’re all dressed and ready for the day’s events, you’d only just remembered the note left by your hook up from the night before so you swipe it up from your mess on the bed, tucking it into your designer bag and slide on your red-bottom heels.
“o-oh! you look nice,” momo chirps after you come down from the landing, heels clicking against the trusty wooden flooring of the hotel. her hair is notably slicked back, wearing a form fitting black dress as she checks over her front of the house book. “i love your—“ pulling up your shades with leather gloved hands, you smile bright at the hostess and makes her stutter— red painted lips seeping into your cheeks. “look. you look beautiful.”
you reach the receptionist’s desk in three short strides and clicks, and hum with appreciation. “a girl’s gotta show up and show out at these things, don’t you agree?” you say, and you’re sure she might think you’re insane for the nonchalant front you have up. “where are you headed looking so pretty?”
“the funeral,” jirou responds for her, appearing from the back in the same manner as before, dressed in a similar manner to her partner. “we uh— our parents were invited along.”
momo adds on. “a-and! we thought you could do with the company, since you’re here for your mother’s funeral alone and all. we could even go together! i can't image how hard this must all be!“
“it’s not hard,” you snap without meaning to and your back straightens like a steel rod. though you hadn’t cared enough to think of a guest list, telling the organisers to invite whoever they pleased so long as they got the job done, you didn’t anticipate that they would hand out passes to everyone in town— to everyone who hated you. “and thank you for the offer ladies, but i have a car waiting for me. i’ll send it back later for my luggage.”
turning swiftly on your designer heels, you leave the hostess couple before you can feel a flick of remorse— before they can see even a crack in the foundation of walls you’d spent years building up. because no one deserves to know how much this town and your mother hurt you. no one.
it’s not hard. today will be easy. you tell yourself, buckling yourself into the black expensive car that’ll be parading you around all day— following right behind the hearse, carrying the villain from your childhood inside. with some time alone before being exposed to the fake tears and falsely sympathetic apologies, you dig into your bag for the note from bakugou, thumb trailing over his chicken scratch handwriting on the front of the folded paper.
‘good luck out there tomorrow or break a leg, whatever they say. give this town fucking hell like you did me last night.
— k.bakugou.’
his words bring an eruption of laughter out of you. so like him, though you’re not really sure what him really is. katsuki bakugou is a man you shared a night of passion with, not a friend you’ve known all your life— even if flashes of a face so similar to his resonate with memories of your brother and your childhood. your heart settles then, right there in your chest, no longer battling the anxiety of facing your old home and all its inhabitants.
and maybe, you’re not alone in all this— maybe really you do have an ally here.
you’re not unfamiliar with the concept of death, nor sudden ones either. you have your older brother, izuku to blame for that.
your memories of him had always been fond. you remember luscious curls of evergreen hair and sun-spotted freckles that looked like the constellations he’d point out to you through the bedroom window late at night. his hands were warm, always handling you with care as if you were a wounded baby bird— especially when you’d cried or scraped your knee. you remember how smart he was, nose always buried deep into a book rather than going outside to kick rocks and snap twigs with the other boys his age. you remember loving izuku, chest bursting with adoration and admiration whenever you looked at your brother because he always held the same emotions when his forest eyes were settled on you.
he was only a few years older, but he felt like your platonic soulmate— your twin flame. back then, your mother had always said you were inseparable, when it was just the three of you in your big, old and creaky house on the far side of the town. you were happy then. without your dad who had left you, you were happy. and even then, with only a few years of life under your belt, you knew that izuku would be your person forever.
what a naive and childish wish you’d had.
nothing lasts forever; not every flower on the forest blooms into something brilliant. some things die, outcompeted by others in the quest for survival. you wanted that for izuku— so badly— wanted that for you both together.
one day he was there, and another, he was gone.
izuku midoriya died just shy of his eleventh birthday— in the summer when whiteridge was warm and the golden leaves hadn’t fallen and the rivers hadn’t frozen over yet. for everyone except your mother, his death was an unfortunate accident, a miscalculation and a misstep on your brother’s part. he was smart, but accidents don’t happen to smart people— is what your mother lived by. his death was no mistake to her, and she chased every single lead until she’d chased away everything and everyone in town trying to prove that.
she gave up her duty. she was the town’s main source of produce and other food products, and while she was allowed to feel her pain and, to cry for help like any grieving mother would— loosing her only son and in that process, she’d given up on the town’s people and her job leading the grocers to feed everyone.
even when your dear izuku was put into the ground, his soul could not rest— because your mother was no longer looking out for you. instead, she searched for whatever truth she thought lay behind his death. your only parent neglected you, subjected you to the vicious cruelty to the people in the town who had thought she’d gone mad trying to find something that wasn’t there.
from the moment izuku died, you no longer had a mother or a brother or a family to fall back on. you only had yourself, and what you could do to take care of your inner child. you didn’t have time to grieve, to cry after losing your soulmate because of how much your mother needed someone to keep her alive and eating and drinking and bathing. for years, you were her lifeline; for years, you were her shield and her foundation until you could no longer handle it.
until you had to run away.
so, of course, you’re no stranger to the black mist known as death that had taken the precious light from your only sibling and clouded your mother’s judgement. maybe that’s the sick reason why you feel numb and look as blank as a canvas during the entirety of your mother’s funeral service. it’s beautiful, you suppose— the organ playing while someone blathers on and on about the miracle of life and the woes of death.
but you hate the entirety of it— how people speak of the woman who failed at raising you as if they knew her personally. you’re surrounded by people who hide their resentment for the midoriya name behind fake tears they’d cultured in their eyes. you catch it in slight twitches in their faces while whiteridge townsfolk mutter their fondest encounters with your mom with wobbles in their voices that sound overly rehearsed and pauses in the perfect places that give others the time to weep. the whole ordeal makes you feel queasy and sick to your stomach, how these people can find the most tender words to speak all while holding some of the most blackened hearts you’ve ever come across right in their chests— beating selfishly strong.
you sit alone, on the front pew of the chapel— radiating resentment in thick waves. for your mother, for whiteridge, for even your darling brother. wishing that he never left you, so that he could be sitting right next to you right now, suffering with you through this ceremony. wondering what life would be like if he were still by your side. would the people of whiteridge have turned their backs on you if he were still here?
would he hold your hand as they lowered your mother’s casket into the dirt a few paces away from where his lay?
the day doesn’t end at the chapel, plenty of cars clog the driveway to your mother’s house where the ‘after-party’ is being held. though the place is rackety and a little gross, the organisers had done it up well enough for people to forget the death that lingers in every corner as they pop open bottles of expensive wine and champagne you’d had imported for the very occasion. they’re hypocrites. celebrating her death rather than the life she lead— and perhaps that makes you the same, being relieved that she’s no longer breathing to torture you with how much more she loved your brother compared to you.
everywhere you turn, there’s someone apologising to you, someone patronisingly telling you that they’re sorry for your loss and wishing you well in wherever life may take you next, cooing at you about how good you look and how pretty you’ve gotten since they last saw you. you wonder if they really pity you for having no family or if they’re after the fortune and name you’ve made for yourself since leaving town. you’d changed, of course, carried a classy air about you and that was enough to fuel their gossip for weeks.
they were all but dying to ask you about how wealthy you were now. after all, your outfit cost a fortune. neighbours and doctors and store owners and highschool classmates that you used to know suffocate you with their condolences until you feel like you really might cry from how overwhelmed you are— it’d be the first time that day.
hastily, you make a break from the kitchen for a moment to breathe— taking large gulps of air as you steady yourself against the rusting, cool metal of the kitchen sink. “give ‘em hell, he said,” you chuckle to yourself, reminding yourself of the words bakugou had left you with. “more like they’re giving me hell.” you wonder where he is, almost everyone in town is here invading your childhood home and your personal space… you’d have thought he would’ve at least been one of those people but then again, he was just like you.
he fucking hated this place. you grab a full bottle of aged red wine and a handful of hors d’oeuvres that have yet to be served up and shove them down your throat— chewing at them unceremoniously just to kill time and give yourself a moment to think.
it’ll only be a few more hours until you run out of the alcohol that warms them up and loosens their lips, then you’ll have the house to yourself— see over a few repairs and head back to the city within the week. free of all of your childhood trauma and hopefully enough material to write a short book on your life so you can please mina, your publicist. until then, you decide, you’ll camp out here in the kitchen where it’s safe and quiet and peaceful.
at least that’s what you thought.
“i am so sorry for your loss.” a nasally voice cuts through your silence and you sigh, exasperated.
popping the cork on the wine bottle in hand, you take a swig before turning around to superficially thank your guest. “that’s so kind of you to say…” you begin, voice trailing off and gaze dropping a few centimetres as you meet the beady eyes of an old schoolmate.
“you probably don’t remember me, now that’cha all big and famous. we went to school together, i sat next to you in calculus. i’m minoru—“
“mineta.” you finish for the purple haired male with an obvious grimace and sip your wine again, leaning back against the kitchen counter. “i remember you. you peaked up my skirt every day throughout highschool ‘n tried to sell my underwear after gym twice a week in senior year.” you state, tongue glossing over your teeth from under your painted red lips. “you made my life a living hell.”
you hated him, it burns bright in your eyes as you look down on mineta. you hated everyone who watched on as he made a fool of you throughout your teen years. you hated this place.
he laughs you off, taking a step closer to you and you stand up straight. “let’s put that in the past shall we? we were just kids!” mineta gestures between the two of you, making the hairs on your neck stand up on end. “besides, we both know you could’a done with the cash. since your mom went kinda cookoo ‘n wasn’t supporting you—“
“what do you want?” you breathe out, frustrated and hot under the collar, torn between throwing up and killing the man. “you still here to bother me, mineta?” you’re not the same girl you were in highschool, a victim to your mother’s mistakes and the cruelty of the people around you. but, fucking hell, it stings. to have come all this way as someone who established herself as a writer, with more fame and fortune than this town can ever hope to see— only to be seen as an easy target again, like you’re a worthless piece of meat.
“i just wanted you to know, that if you ever need anything,” mineta winks, his behaviour scummy and reminiscent of your old school days. “then ‘m right here to—“
“help?” a timbre, calm voice cuts through— making the short and slimey man before you jump out of his skin. “she won’t be needin’ any of that from you, minoru.”
looking up, relief and recognition washes over you. your saviour looks a little different than you remember, but his ruby gem eyes are still warm and still safe— he’s a lot taller now, a broad strapping young man that has to duck as he makes himself known in your mother’s tiny and cluttered kitchen. locks of silky, eye-catching cherry hair would have been tumbling down his back had it not been effortlessly thrown up into a fitting man bun. he glows, skin golden and clear— with only a few scars littering his bulging arms, peeking out from his rolled up sleeves. his suit jacketed abandoned somewhere else in the house.
“k-kirishima!” mineta squeaks.
“why don’cha head outside, minoru? i heard they’re startin’ to serve up cake. wouldn’t want ya to miss out.” though he says his words slowly and his handsome face remains kind, there’s something eerily threatening about the way kirishima speaks to the other man that makes him scramble outside to join your other unwanted guests. “hey,” the redhead greets you next, muttering your name and approaching you as if you’re a deer about to be spooked. “you okay?”
letting out a breath you hadn’t realised you were holding, you nod your head vigorously and set down your wine— face bursting with your first genuine smile of the evening. “well, if it isn’t eijirou kirishima!” you squeal excitedly, tipsily thrusting yourself into his arms and giving him a tight squeeze.
eijirou kirishima was probably the one thing that kept you sane during your time at whiteridge. growing up, he was the boy next door, the one who always had missing teeth but the biggest grin you’d ever seen. and even though you’d spent most of your childhood by izuku‘s side, you remember afternoons full of sunshine playing with the redhead from across the street, digging up worms and rolling in mud puddles that you’d both get in trouble for doing later on. you were close, up until you lost your brother.
other parents keeping their children away from you didn’t stop eijirou from splitting his lunch with you at recess or lending you his protractor in geometry class ( in exchange for your help, of course, it wasn’t his strongest subject ).
the pair of you officially cut ties when kirishima didn’t continue with highschool in favour for taking over the family repair business— and after you’d graduated, you skipped town, not leaving him with anything to contact you by. so eventually, you lost touch.
“lil’ midoriya!” eijirou cheers back, arms wrapping around your waist to squeeze you into him. his hugs were always incredibly comforting, and being tucked into the plushness of his chest does wonders for soothing your inner turmoil. “s’been a while.”
“i-uh, i actually don’t go by that name anymore,” you mumble to him, feeling like a sheepish school girl under his inquisitive gaze.
“oh yeah, i forgot. yer like some big-shot writer now, huh? ya even look the part!” kirishima keeps his hands on you as he pulls back to give you a once over, twirling you lightly while the fabrics of your clothes fly about.
you can’t quite place it, how he makes you feel so small, in a good way but you don’t dwell on it— happiness simmering in your veins instead of anguish. for once. “i haven't completely changed! like you said…it’s just been a while!”
“change ain’t a bad thing, darlin’,” he grins, the casual use of the pet name nearly making you short-circuit. “but ya did lose yer accent.”
“oh my god, shut up! you’re like the third person who’s mentioned my accent since i’ve been back!”
the pair of you share a laugh, which quickly fizzles into thin air as nostalgia clouds over you both. kirishima hasn’t heard you laugh in almost a decade, and you haven’t seen him at all in the same amount of time. he slowly lets you go, and an odd mix of pity and sadness crosses his features as he looks down at you. “ya looked so gloomy t’day. i-i wanted to speak with you earlier. it’s just…been so long,” he whispers, the happiness of the previous moment fading away. “you can’t be holdin’ up well.”
you’ve tried your hardest, not to feel sadness, to seem weak in front of the adults who failed you as a child. but it has been hard. your mother is gone; your brother is gone; and even though it always has been just you— that feeling is even more real to you now.
shaking your head, you blink back tears you didn’t know had, as if it’ll make them stop. “i’m not,” you reply quietly. “but such is life, right? we’re all a little miserable.”
kirishima hums in agreement but doesn’t seem pleased with your answer. “wanna get outta here? looks t’me like you could do with a lil’break. my moms are around, they could clear this place out while we go for a drive?” he suggests without thinking, the kindness in his heart speaking for him.
eijirou’s always been like that. kind.
he was one of the few people in your life to show true kindness to you.
so trusting him blindly, and without hesitation, you take the metaphorical hand he holds out to you and give him a simple…
“yes, i’d love to.”
“r’member when we were little, ‘nd izuku used to make us sneak out t’come watch shooting stars ‘nd meteor showers?”
like he’d promised, kirishima took you for a drive ten or fifteen minutes just outside of whiteridge where the woods are peaceful and the sky is clearest. it had gotten dark, fast, the moon making herself at home up above and her children shining bright right along with her as your red haired companion parked up just shy of a spot you recognised from when you were kids.
the little clearing, you remember frequenting, was surrounded by the cool scent of pine as if it were a blanket— crystal streams running through with a soft rippling tune to them, and the perfect view of every star ever to be named if you find yourself there on a clear night. its almost ironic how eijirou had driven you here, as if he knew you needed a moment with your brother after such an emotionally draining day. even after all of these years, he still knows you, what comforts you when you’re overwhelmed and need a breath of fresh air.
kirishima sits in the back of his truck, leaning back with eyes illuminated by the balls of fire burning a million miles away as he speaks. he looks to you after— his face soft and smile…adorably toothy. his entire aura, comforting.
you turn to face him with a warm smile of your own, fixing his suit jacket that he’d given you over your frame, your fingers just barely peeking out of the sleeves. “yeah, and you used to make me hold your hand ‘cause you were scared of walking here in the dark.” you’re teasing the red head as if no time has passed, like you’re still that little squadron of neighbours and other kids that would follow your brother’s lead. kirishima was just the one you were closest to out of all your older brother’s friends. he lets you saddle up to him once you get cold, wrapping a bulking arm around you— his hand on your knee, practically dwarfing you in size.
“it was f’protection!” eijirou whines as you nestle yourself into him, praying that you don’t hear fast and hard his heart is beating.
“oh sure, for protection,” scoffing, you don’t even bother looking up at your old friend— choosing to press the chub of your right cheek further into his warmth. “it was like you were in love with me or something.”
it’s a joke, initially. you’re still teasing him like you would have when you were younger— back then you thought you were the only pretty girl eijirou knew. he was much more squirmish and easily flustered back then. and even though it feels like no time has gone by, kirishima has gotten bolder. he doesn’t try to push you away, but instead pinches your waist playfully and rests his head on top of yours as if to hide his raging red cheeks under the guise of keeping you warm.
“…’nd what if i had been.”
a comfortable silence settles between you both in the back of eijirou’s truck— punctuated by the odd chirps of wild animals and the bristle of the trees around you. “then i wish you’d have said something…maybe i would’ve stuck around.” you say quietly, your voice a little hoarse from the alcohol you’d consumed earlier on in the day.
you feel him shake his head above you, soft hair tickling your forehead. “then i’d just have been holdin’ you back,” kirishima tells you like he means it, as if he knew the outcome of telling you how he really felt in the past. he doesn’t want you to dwell, to feel regret on a day of loss like this. “i mean look at’cha! you’ve got the job of your dreams. you’re successful. ya must be happy!”
your response is immediate and solemn, your pretty features airbrushed with an unwritten expression. “i wouldn’t quite call it happiness, eiji.” in the mess of your limbs huddled for heat, you walk your digits down the length of the red head’s arm and play with his fingers timidly. “but look at you! you’ve grown so much, i’m sure i used to be taller than you.”
“oh yeah?” kirishima doesn’t like that you’re sad. he spent too much of his teen years watching you drown in it. “well maybe—!” pulling himself off of you ( regretfully ), he quickly hops off the truck to stand between your legs— hoisting you by the backs of your thighs into the air so he can twirl you around in his arms. “you just got shorter!” the night sky twists into a Milky Way cocktail above you, pure and genuine laughter spilling from between your lips ( your lipstick has long worn off by now ) as you hook your ankles at the small of kirishima’s back to keep yourself secure.
coming to a standstill once more so he can catch his breath, your childhood friend brushes a thumb over your hip before he whispers to you. “…there’s one other reason why i dragged you out here.” he says your name, garnering your attention.
“and what might that be?”
“my moms wanted to know when i’d be able to start the repairs on your house, they got the call from your solicitor a couple days ago and—“
your nails dig into his broad shoulders out of excitement, head whipping down in a happy rush. “no way! you’re the repairman? thank god! at least i’ll be seeing someone i like everyday.”
kirishima breaks out into a grin at your joke and pokes at your cheek “ya like me?”
of course you do. he’s your friend, your reason for sanity…maybe your first love.
but you won’t ever admit that. you don’t need anything tying you down to this town— no less, someone like kirishima.
someone who actually cares for you.
“don’t push it, red.” you warn him simply, your tone etched with a light friskiness to let him know you’re joking— biting the tip of his finger too. “you can come work on the house whenever you’re ready. it’s not a problem to me since i’ll be a little busy working on something the whole time. just let me know the costs of anything you need, i’ll pay full price for everything, and then some.”
adjusting you in his grip, eijirou bounces you and smirks sexily when you squeak in surprise at his movements— at his brute strength. “oh? what’cha workin’ on lil’miss writer?”
“i don’t kiss and tell, eijirou.” you wink.
“really? even if i kiss ya right now? if i offer you a discount on the house?” he keeps his voice low and gravelly as he talks quietly against your earlobe— and you don’t believe for a second the stupid southern hunk doesn’t know what effect he’s having on you.
so you swat him, right in the chest and pout like a petulant child— trying to hide how easily flustered he makes you. “nuhuh! and it’s full price or no work for you, mister.”
“alright, alright! i got it!” kirishima grins, twirling you both once more. “full price and no spoilers. now c’mon, let’s get’cha home. yer shiverin’ like a city purse dog.”
calming down, you steady your hands on his broad shoulders— feeling the muscle ripple beneath your touch. “thank you for tonight, eiji.” there’s a certain wistfulness that you speak with, satisfaction and happiness breaking through your usual simple tone of voice. eijirou kirishima has always brought out the better sides in you, soothing your inner child. “all of this, it helped me feel better about not being sad for my ma’s death. helped me feel a little more free.” before you can back down or change your mind, you plant a soft smooch against the side of his face— staining his skin with the last of a crimson lipstick mark.
his gaze that matches the colour painted onto the plushness of your lips flicks down to them, before looking away— embarrassed. “oh… well s’nothin’... you deserve t’have someone t’rely on. everyone does,” kirishima mumbles as he sets you down on two feet, scratching the back of his head bashfully, letting out a nervous chuckle. “we should uh…really get’cha back. ‘fore i do somethin’ reckless.”
he bundles you up into his truck after that, guiding you into the passenger’s seat and buckling your seatbelt in— even though you both know that you’re more than capable of doing so yourself. you let him, because for once, you feel like you deserve to be cared for and looked after. the drive back is shorter than it was to the creak, mostly because you spend it teasing your old friend, swiping his cowboy hat from the back seat and shoving it atop his messy red mane to make him laugh so hard that his truck swerves along the empty mountain roads.
your mother’s house is clear and vacant when kirishima’s truck pulls into its gravel driveway, just like he’d promised you. both of his moms had texted him on your drive back to let him know that all of your guests had been promptly kicked out, leaving the place near spotless— sparing you the worry of having to clean up in the morning. like the gentleman he is, eijirou offers his hand to you when you hop out of his truck, and the novelty of it all warms you from the inside out, wrapping around your ice cold heart.
the steps to the front porch creak under the weight of the well-built man, almost dwarfing the thing as kirishima ducks his head to stand under it more comfortably— towering over you at the front door in the process. “i uh—probably should give you this back—” you say breathlessly, watching the air wrapped around the syllables of your words come out in cool puffs. you gesture to his suit jacket, still drowning you and move to shrug off the fabric, remembering how he’d so sweetly given it to you.
“n-no! keep it,” kirishima blurts out quickly, before you can even finish speaking. he grabs your hands— face hot and tainted with a bright rosey blush. “i’ll be round in a few days t’come pick it up ‘n fix a few things around the house anyways… maybe y’could try and get the lipstick stain out until then?” he’s staring down at you like he’s going to kiss you, like he wants a little more than an innocent lip lock too.
and you’d be a liar to say you weren’t thinking of inviting your childhood friend upstairs for something not so innocent either.
“i think you like it this way,” comes your response as you stand on your tiptoes, meeting kirishima halfway— giving him the space to back off or to swoop down and take what he wants.
“yeah,” eijirou breathes while his eyes flutter shut, long lashes brushing against his cheeks and in that moment— he’s close enough to have his nose nudge yours. “i do.” he takes off his hat, a hand resting on his chest as he leans down to press his lips against yours— not moving until he feels you fall into him, reciprocating with a tenderness that has you melting like butter in a pan even in the coolness of the night. your arms reach up to wrap around his thick neck as his finds your waist, tangling in the tiny carmine curls at its base while you pour unspoken words and thankfulness into the sweet smooch.
“i should go…don’t know what i’ll do if i don’t hold back so…goodnight,” he murmurs your name in pillowy hushed tones as he pulls away— barely wanting to let you go in favour of filling his lungs with oxygen again. “sleep well, kay?”
“k-kay, g-goodnight!” you sway in place, waving kirishima off with a dreamy smile before unlocking the door, rushing in and slamming it shut behind you.
there’s a tremble to your fingers as you touch your kiss-swollen lips, a squeal erupting from your throat shortly after.
you hated this place, everything about it.
except for maybe one person, who’s maybe made your trip to whiteridge worth it, after all.
‘my life fucking sucks…’
the cursor flashes on the page of your google doc teasingly— taunting you to add to the four existing words meant to be the catalyst of your origin story. the crème de la crème of your life. the piece de resistance. your god awful fucking autobiography. your brows knit together, meeting like two bristled and angry caterpillars in the centre of your forehead as you stare at the near naked document. the words don’t feel right on the page, nothing like anything you’ve ever written before and you struggle to write more.
because this doesn’t feel like you.
yes, this is meant to be a book on your life— a dedication to how you got where you are, an ode to everything you’ve ever made but… it’s not you. you’re used to building worlds from nothing but the eightieth song on your favourite playlist and three minutes of the best music you’ve ever heard. you’re familiar with designing a character based on the colour gradients in the sky that afternoon and garnering their personalities from interactions you’d seen in coffee shops or on trains throughout your week. what you were born to write is fiction, cultivating your own escape from your memories— a solace, somewhere else to breathe and exist away from real life and world issues.
writing about yourself feels like a grotesque science project, or learning about punnett squares in your tenth grade biology class. it’s like writing an essay on a concept you can’t quite wrap your brain around no matter how many sources you read into. you’re forced to analyse every little detail you spent smoothing over in your adolescence, synthesising a new skin for yourself to live in, pretending your trauma wasn’t really there.
pressing the backspace button your laptop’s keyboard, you delete the words and pull back from the screen to crack your knuckles— holding your interlinked fingers high above your head to stretch the lethargic muscles in your back. you’d been sitting at the desk in your mother's master bedroom for hours at this point— waiting for words that never come, anticipating a bigbang of inspiration to hit you until your words hit the page. you wonder if this is how the higher power felt before they created the universe, if they sat in silence, annoyance and confusion. just…waiting.
your fingertips coast over the keyboard again, typing out another sentence to start your story with.
‘my life really fucking sucks…’
did adding that extra curse word help? does starting it off like that come off as too ungrateful? you have everything, you muse, a life people only dream of having. money in your account, the number never falling too low— healthcare, basically free of charge, a secure job with rich foods to fill your stomach and all the fans where you could only ever wish to meet them all in person. that’s how your readers would perceive you, at least.
in reality, you’re bitter and lonely— you have no family, you’re too scarred from your past to make new friends and all you really have is yourself. and your publicist, mina, but she’d been pissing you off with pestering you about this book.
maybe you could be vulnerable here, use the solitude of your adulthood as material for your book. your mind starts to drift with fresh new ideas printed into some lobe of your brain until you land on a certain someone from the other night. a warm glow in your current state of gloom. kirishima…he could still be your friend. after all, you’d made a connection when you’d reunited at your mother’s funeral and his number was right there in your phone. for repairs, of course, but it was still there…
no. you shake your head, trying to realign your focus with the task and craft at hand— you could go back to your roots and do an internet search for sentence starters, a ‘how to a start book for dummies’ might help you out, too. however, the goddess of higher power seems to be messing with you, for when you click on your internet browser, you’re met with the foul message that the wifi in your mom’s house has completely gone out.
you’re so fucking lucky google docs is able to work offline— otherwise you’re sure you would have lost what little progress you’d made on the start of your book. that surely would have ruined your morning. it does appear, in spite of it all, that having no wifi gives you an excuse to take a break from your work and from mina’s nagging to call a certain hunky and red-haired repairman for assistance.
at least fate is on your side— sort of… she has a funny way of toying with you. for now, you take it as a positive sign and shake off your frustration, reaching for your phone to make the call.
“kirishima repair service, where your repairs make us riot!”
eijirou picks up your call before you can even hit the first dial tone— he’d been eager, drinking up your words like a cool glass of water on a hot summer’s day as you complained to him about the wifi, the creaky floorboards in the bathroom that freaked you out last night and the mysterious drip in the hallway connecting the living room to the kitchen. you’d been lodged up in the house since the funeral, no point in spending money on a hotel when you’d need to oversee the work on your mother’s old place anyways— sorting through her belongs for sale or storage while you worked on your book.
and, you hadn’t thought much of it at the time, one casual comment about the god-forsaken house slipping out after another and the redhead hadn’t even protested. ‘i’ll be right over,’ he said, so proud you could hear the smile in his voice from over the crackles of the line. ‘i was plannin’ to start today anyway. wanted to see your face too…’
“hmm, that’s cute.”
giggling and hiding your smile, you hold open the door wide enough for eijirou to slip past you— trying not to dwell on his size as he ducks his head to enter your childhood home, ridding yourself of any inappropriate thought. like how he nearly had you pinned against the door the other night, with the vague confirmation that he was thinking about fucking you right then and there.
“will you be needing anything, ei? i, uh, found some tools and the instructions for the router back in the kitchen…” you mumble, planning an escape route from the bulking man and your thirsty thoughts as he practically dwarfs everything in the house.
kirishima looks at you once, his inquisitive and bright eyes having swept over the interior— as if he was trying to match the look of the house to his memory. it’d been a while since either of you had been here together. “oh! nah. got everythin’ i need right here, darlin’,” he says, gaze still set on your face and neither of you making a move. right…where? did he mean you? were you everything he needed? after a beat of awkward silence he coughs, probably having realised his words and lifts his toolbox sheepishly— cheeks a shade darker than his hair. “i-i mean in here, the toolbox.”
“right…um should i point you to the—?”
“the wifi router? please.”
“don’t sound so desperate to get away from me eiji, it’ll make me feel bad.”
“‘m not!” he defends quickly, letting you guide him to the living room and to a high rustic bookshelf where the point of internet connection sits. the device is too high up for you to reach, but kirishima swipes it down with ease— avoiding eye contact with you as he inspects the red lights indicating a bad signal. “s’just…yer lookin’ at me in ways that’ll make me forget that ‘m here to work. and i need to focus, sweetheart.”
oh.
so he had been thinking about the other night too.
grinning slyly, you cross your arms over your chest— avoiding the heat bubbling under your skin when your repair man’s gaze drops down to follow your movement. “i’ll leave you to work then, eijirou. wouldn’t want to distract you from your hard work,” you coo, cocking your head to the side in satisfaction when his whole body stutters— the wifi router slipping from his grip before you catch it and pass it to him, getting a little too close. “call me if you need me, i’ll be across the hall, working on my book.”
“i-i will. if i need you. f-for the wifi! i’ll probably need’ya to check if the connection works once i reset everythin’—“ he stumbles over his words, not quite saying what he means, not quite knowing what he means, if you’re even talking about the repairs anymore. “yanno what? i’ll just start workin’ now.”
he’s so cute, so easily riled up just like you remember from back in the day. with one last pinch to his bulging bicep, you skip back to the kitchen to try and get started on your dreadful own task at hand.
“good luck, cowboy.”
about an hour and a half later, eijirou politely ( disrespectfully ) disrupts your bubble of failed creativity by clearing his throat, an apologetic expression plastered across his face before he hesitantly steps into the kitchen. you glance up from your laptop and from where you sit at the rustic, hand carved wooden dining table in the centre of the room— blinking twice to stop your eyes from bulging out of their place in your skull when they finally land on kirishima.
“any luck?” you whisper, breathing deep through your nose as he approaches the table in short strides— the scent of pine and his own musk filling the air.
“not an ounce,” kirishima huffs, clearly annoyed and you can tell by the adorable pout spread across the shine on his lips. “damn router won’t connect for more than fifteen minutes! can’t freakin’ figure the thing out!"
the red head’s shoulders slouch as he takes a seat at the table with you, squeezing himself into one of the chairs he used to have to climb into when he was little. letting out a fond laugh, you put your hand on top of his and give it a comforting squeeze— not wanting eijirou to be too annoyed with himself. “if it helps i’ve not made much progress either,” you gesture to the chicken scratch notes you’ve resorted to taking on the various sheets of paper, scattered across the table. “i can’t seem to figure out how to start this book. it’s killing me.”
this time it’s eijirou who gives your hand a soft squeeze, flipping his palm to lace your fingers together— you try not to dwell on how thick and rough they are. “‘m sure you’ll get it,” he whispers to you, a dopey look on his face— pride, for you, dancing in his ruby gem eyes. “yer amazing at what you do…”
“thanks eiji,” you chirp at his praise, bristling with happiness. “you always know what to say, huh?”
“of course, i’ll never stop tellin’ you how proud i am of you fer gettin’ outta this place. makin’ a name for yourself.” he goes on, rambling earnestly with excited dips and dives sprinkled throughout his voice. “how about this? i needa go into town to get you a new router, so after that, we can grab some grub at that old diner ‘n maybe take our frustrations out on that? my treat.”
your stomach rumbles at the thought— hunger sneaking up on you like a big cat on its prey.
“y-yeah, that sounds great!”
“one black coffee for the ‘lil lady, and one super sweet hot chocolate supreme with extra whipped cream ‘n marshmallows for you, baby.”
you try to ignore the trill of displeasure that runs through you as the waitress places your drinks on the table— leaning in real close to eijirou as she passes him his hot cocoa. he’s too distracted to notice her blatant flirting, like a child on christmas as soon as he’s got his sickly sweet beverage in front of him. but you do. she was cute, definitely from around here and pretty as a picture too— she’d make a cute little wife, and if he wanted, she could give eijirou as many kids as he damn well pleased.
you sit across from him as you stir a teaspoon of sugar or two into your coffee—bitter, tired but still mysteriously sexy so at least you had that going for you and eijirou kirishima would be a fool to pass you up for some hillbilly bit—
“black coffee? is that seriously all ya want to drink?” he cuts off your trail of thought, staring straight past the waitress and right at you— as if you’re the only person in the room.
smiling to yourself when the waitress scurries away, you circle the spoon around your mug— watching the white sugar crystals dissolve into the dark, piping hot liquid. “as black as my soul,” you joke, eyes darting up just in time to watch kirishima snort his whipped cream. “what’s so funny, ‘shima?”
“your humour was never this…dark when we’re kids.” he chuckles in response, nose scrunched and eyes bright.
you take a sip, hiding behind the rim of your cup. “being a writer does that to you.” as does being abandoned by your mom, losing your brother.
kirishima quickly senses the dip in mood and overs you a tender smile, resting his hand atop yours just like in the kitchen back home and rubbing his thumb over the backs of your knuckles. “so…this book yer workin’ on?” he pokes the bear, running back to sip on his cocoa when you playfully scowl at him.
“i said no spoilers, eiji!”
“c’mon, just one? i am treating you to breakfast — at least tell me what it’s about.”
you can’t resist when he begs like that, like a big puppy awaiting his treats— so you reply, hesitant words clinging to the steam rising from your coffee. “it’s…” you start. “it’s about my life?”
“and you’re struggling to write that?” kirishima quips incredulously, whipped cream tainting the cupid’s bow of his full lips.
body flushing with embarrassment, your lips turn into a frown. “h-hey! it’s a lot harder than it looks!”
pulling his hand from yours to wave the pair of them about, eijirou is quick to apologise— nearly knocking over your drinks in the process. “n-no! i just mean—“ the words die on his sugar-coated lips as he flounders for the right thing to say, to articulate himself properly. “i-i mean yeah, what would i know?” he speaks quieter now, looking down at his lap while his jubilant actions calm, and you cock your head to the side— curious to pick his brain for an explanation as you prompt him with a tiny ‘go on…’ “like, i dunno, i dropped outta school but…you’re interestin’, ya always have been! a-at least to me…so i figured… you’d have a whole lot t’talk about.”
you’re the one who turns bashful after that, picking at the sleeves of the random sweater you’d thrown on, discovering it at the bottom of your suitcase. your gaze wonders to the wet and frosted windows of the diner noticing the chipped paint on its panes and the walls now coated in an inviting shade of yellow— different from the colours you remember from coming here as a child on saturday mornings. there was never any consideration for how other people perceived you when it came to yourself.
you had to learn fast and hard that society didn’t take kindly to children who didn’t meet the norms, whose families were a little twisted with tragedy like yours. almost everyone you knew growing up had turned on you as soon as your brother lost his life, same as when your mother started to lose herself, too.
it never occurred to you— that someone outside of the damaging thoughts plaguing your mind would care for your story, would care about you and the little details that make up your DNA. perhaps your readers would take interest in how you and izuku would play hopscotch on the way to school, how you preferred wearing your tie loose on your neck or not at all because you didn’t like to feel too constricted, how you liked your eggs fried until their edges were a little black in your bentos or how you would trade them with the kids in the playground before it all came crashing down.
before the accident.
and maybe, your readers would take comfort in the girl the accident forced you to become. the one who kept her head down, got the grades she needed and fucked right out of town. the one who got lost in the city and published story after story in smaller anthologies until she got her big break— until someone noticed the passion she’d penned onto paper. until someone saw her for more than just her mother, and her brother and her harrowing past.
until someone finally saw you.
but someone had been seeing you all this time, rooting for you from here. from home. and he was sitting right in front of you.
“i didn’t think—” you pause, looking back at the rugged man before you. “i never knew you saw me…t-that way! that way. i never knew you saw me that way.”
kirishima hums content, an expression of wistfulness taking residence on his face.
“i don’t think you ever really noticed how i saw you.”
you open your mouth to speak— dying to know what eijirou means, but the waitress from earlier returns with the steaming hot plates of breakfast you both had ordered with the red haired repairman quick to steal a bite from yours. he forks his way through half of the omelette on your plate in favour of scraping it onto his own, giving you a wolfish grin as he downs a bite in mere seconds.
the whole ordeal makes you forget what you were planning to say. “hey! i was gonna eat that!”
“oh yeah? but’cha never finished your plate back when we were kids.” he taunts, daring to swipe more food from you.
“that’s ‘cause you always ate what was on it before i got the chance!” you squeak back through your laughter, blocking his fork with your own.
after breakfast at the diner, the rest of your day is spent pressed right up to eijirou’s side as he guides you around whiteridge’s town centre. he’d fought you over the bill, let you stand on your tiptoes to ruffle his mane when you paid a tip worth greater than the bill as he pouted on the way out too. his fingers graze yours along the way, not too far out of reach but enough to remind you that he’s there— walking with you through the memories that you relive.
he points out the tuck shops you would sneak into after class. he forces you to press your nose against the glass with him watching the bakery put out fresh loaves of milk bread and tucks his hat over your ears when the breeze starts to pick up, sending ice chills down your spine.
kirishima is unbelievably warm and it’s intoxicating, his joyous spirit floods through your dark memories of whiteridge with hues of soft pinks— removing the taint of loneliness from your childhood. he’ll kiss your knuckles after every spot you visit— good and bad, reminding you that he’s there with every step you take through the town that left you to rot when you were too young to defend yourself.
kirishima is there, kirishima will always be there and he’ll always choose you. and you remind yourself not to take his comforting presence in your life for granted from now on.
you both fly back almost ten years when you stumble upon the playground you used to frequent as little ones. like children, you race to the rusted and red painted swing set— slipping on the ice, with your cheeks bitten raw by the cold as it shows in each puffed out breath you take. it makes you feel alive, makes you feel the blood pumping hotly through your veins again.
there are mothers with their infants that look down on you both, but neither of you can think to care, too wrapped up in the happy bubble of nostalgia that shelters you both from the cruel world. of course, eijirou beats you to it, claiming the last remaining swing and sitting on it with all his weight— nearly pulling the damn thing from its old and worn out chains.
“push me, darlin’,” eijirou demands jocosely, his big hands gripping the chains— his crimson eyes rioting and roaring with a teasing glint as he looks up at you. flirts with you. “or yer chicken.”
rolling your eyes, you stand in front of him. “you think i can’t, red?” placing your hands over his on the chain and muster all your strength to start swinging him back and forth, the heels of your boots crunching against the frosted tarmac beneath them. “you’ve gotten bolder while i’ve been away! what’s gotten into you?” you goad him, picking up momentum while you both sway with the swing. “did you look up flirting tips after that girl… who was it? nejire from two grades above found out you had a crush on her in middle school—“
“you still don’t get it,” he says. the swinging comes to a dramatic halt, kirishima forcefully digging his boots into the rubber flooring below to stop you both— his grip on the chains dropping to cling to your waist, dragging you to stand between his wide spread legs. “do you?”
“e-eijirou—?”
your words die with the gust of wind that blows over you both and you can’t tell if you’re shivering because of how cool it is or because of kirishima’s warmth as it spreads through you like a flame taking over kindling— his lips ghosting over yours, pressing a feather light kiss to them as if to test the waters. when you tilt your head to meet him at a better angle, the redhead knows it’s safe to continue— deepening his actions, gliding his tongue against the seam of your lips as though to ask permission for more before you let him.
the kiss is a little rougher than you’ve felt with him before, contradicting with his gentlemanly nature— not that you mind, feeling all the emotions he pours into it.
“meant what i said, yanno,” kirishima breathes into your mouth after you pull apart, eyes half lidded and his hold on you still tight— as if he doesn’t want you to slip away. “ya never noticed the way i looked at you. how much i liked ya. even now, there’s been no one else since you left.”
“eiji…” you gasp, wordless for the moment but he presses on, brushing a thumb over your cheek.
warm, unlike the weather.
“i’m not asking for all of you now…or for you to magically have feelings for me. i can wait, i’ve had to for this long anyways.” he adds with a smile, one so soft compared to how he just kissed you— sending you reeling and making your heart a rapid beating mess. “no pressure or anything, we can make this whatever you want it to be.”
“a-and what if…what if i want you by my side?”
“then i’ll be here.”
“for how long?”
“as long as you’ll have me.”
you fist kirishima’s jacket under your grip and steady yourself— blinking back tears of appreciation before they fall, letting kirishima thumb them away when they do. “that’ll be a while red, i hope you know that.” you huff, holding onto him so that he doesn’t let you go.
kirishima only wraps the entirety of his arm around your waist— keeping you close as he says. “i know, i’ll make that time worth your while,” he presses a small smooch to your midriff, looking up at you with those same rioting and lovesick red eyes and speaking again. “let’s get’cha back home ‘n set that wifi up, yeah? i think me kissin’ you in front of all those mommas has them a little spooked ‘n to be honest, ‘m barely holdin’ myself back here.”
“you’re insatiable, red.” you swat at his chest, stepping back so he can tower over you once again.
“and who’s to blame for that?” kirishima pinches your side back all while taking your hand to lead you out of the park and back to the bustling square of whiteridge.
‘me.’ you think giddily and your heart settles in its place, soothed by eijirou’s heavy hand in yours.
for once you’re happy to take the blame for this one.
there’s a car you don’t recognise in your driveway when you get back— blocking kirishima’s truck from parking up next to your own vehicle.
“do y’know whose car that is? were you expecting guests?”
raising a brow, you peer up at kirishima who sits confused behind the wheel. “you’re the only person i like in this town and all of my family is dead. of course i’m not expecting guests.” you deadpan, but raise your hands in defence when the repairman glares down at you. “i kid! i kid!”
“not funny, darlin’,” he grunts and sets the car into park, making sure she’s steady before opening the door on the driver’s side. “stay here, ‘m gonna check it out. robberies aren’t that common here but i don’t wanna risk it.” risk you.
with your face scrunching up, your actions follow the same path as your red haired companion and you unbuckle your seatbelt swiftly to jump out of the truck. “you’re not leaving me here! what if mineta’s lurking around, waiting to get me alone!” you huff, boots crunching on the ice below as you follow kirishima’s tacks up towards your mother’s house and current place of residence.
“neither of those jokes were funny, stop makin’ fun of yer trauma, kay?” he scolds you gently, casting his gaze over his shoulder to check on you. only when eijirou‘s back is turned again, do you mimic and mock him a little before slipping your hand into his— noticing he was holding it out for you from behind. you hear the porch creek up above, breath hitching as kirishima yells at the intruder. “hey! don’cha know that this is private property— you can’t be here!”
“calm yer tits shitty hair, ‘m just here to get my stuff. i ain’t botherin’ no one.” a rough voice responds, sending a wave of familiarity through you. “b’sides, i got. a fuckin’. key.” the last sentence is punctuated with pockets of a condescending tone— causing light bulb memories to flash through your mind and back to the night at the bar.
“bakugou?”
stepping out from behind the mountain that is eijirou kirishima, you reveal yourself to another set of red eyes— watching as recognition flood’s the blonde’s features and smooths over the crease between his knitted brows. “well, well, well. who do we fuckin’ have here…” bakugou rasps, his signature smirk tugging the corners of his lips upwards as he gives you the once over. “how ya doin’, sweetheart? mind gettin’ this big red oaf off my back?”
“oaf? sweetheart, do you two know each other?” kirishima grunts defensively, squaring himself in front of you as if to protect you from katsuki’s leering gaze.
“know each other?” bakugou interjects before you can, smirk only widening. “we slept together, shitty hair. couple days ago, weren’t it, baby? she took me real fuckin’ good—“
“now hold on a second!”
“are we lyin’ now, bakugou? doesn’t the town hate you enough for that already?”
“e-eiji! that’s not nice—“
“you don’t know shit, fuckface.”
“oh, i know all about whiteridge’s shitty little recluse—“
growing more irritated and embarrassed by the boys’ back and forth arguing— you reach into bakugou’s car through the window ( as it’s still running and open ) and press down on the horn until it shocks them both out of their bickering. “that’s enough!” you growl, eyes shooting between them angrily as you take turns pointing fingers at them. “kirishima, backdown. you’re not my guard dog…and bakugou! what the fuck are you doing here? is your name really even bakugou?”
both the blonde and the redhead settle for a second. “it is, i am katsuki bakugou.” bakugou shifts on your front porch and lifts a box up high for you to see, once that you didn’t notice before. “used to live here, helped ya ma out since she looked after me durin’ a rough time…after ya skipped town ‘n stuff.” he explains simply, wincing when you let out a quiet gasp that’s slightly visible in the cold air. “just came t’get the last of my shit. couldn’t bring myself to tell ya before…and it wasn’t appropriate at the funeral. ‘m sorry for that.”
“you…knew my mom?” you frown, clutching onto kirishima who stays as still as stone, watching the exchange.
“yeah…she wasn’t as crazy as ya made out to be at the bar, yanno.” the blonde smiles sad, yet wistfully, passing by both you and eijirou to get to his car.
kirishima barks from beside you, tracking bakugou’s movements like he’s defending his territory. “don’t you think it’s rude to speak ill of the dead?”
“don’t you know that i ain’t fuckin’ talkin’ to you?”
“boys,” you warn again before turning to katsuki to give him your name. your real one, with the midoriya last name and all, and it brings you comfort when he doesn’t immediately point it out or apologise for your loss like everyone else. “thanks for stopping by bakugou, and thank you for that night, i guess?”
he nods, slipping into his vehicle with the box now in the passenger’s seat— the rest stashed away safely in his trunk. “anytime, princess,” he coos, revving up his engine to drive away and around eijirou’s truck— only reminding you even more of the explicit night that you both shared before your mother’s funeral.
you watch him go with the redhead as your company, jumping out of your skin when he speaks to you, roughly. “y’should head up to the house. i’ll get the new wifi router from the truck ‘n set up for you.”
“do you need any help again?”
“no need. i got this.”
just like he said, eijirou handles everything on his own— fixing your wifi and setting it up with speed. except, he’s icy the whole time, rejecting your advances, meaner and slightly ruder than before as he works until he doesn’t anymore. gone is the soft, warm and comforting heat of eijirou kirishima from earlier, where he kissed you and practically begged you for a chance. you can only assume it has something to do with your hook up and encounter with bakugou… but that was before and it’s not like your sex life was any of his business.
kirishima rushes off before tending to any other repairs to the house— grumbling something about coming back in a few days time as he slams the door shut behind him, leaving you to fester in silence once more. men are fuckin’ weird, you decide.
with no inspiration left in the tank and you feeling a little butt-hurt from the boys— you take solace in exploring your old house and the memories that dance within it’s creaking walls. pictures line the pathway up the staircase to your childhood or teenage bedroom, and you can’t help but stop to look at framed and dusty photographs of you and your brother throughout your early years. all toothless and gappy smiles.
a particular one catches your attention— a snap of both you and izuku decked out in swimmer’s gear, juice stains from red popsicles smeared along your chubby cheeks and orange against izuku’s freckled ones. you remember it being taken on a summer’s day before you ventured into the woods to swim about in the streams so you could cool off.
lifting the frame from the wall, you blow off the dirt, thumbing your older brother’s youthful face— missing him, hurting for him and pressing the trinket close to your chest as if to hold him for one last time. you squeeze a little too tight, jumping back as paper slips from behind the frame and onto the wooden steps with a light thud.
“what the—?” you muse to yourself, hanging the portrait back on its nail before carefully scooping up the sheets of paper.
the notes, with your mother’s writing on them.
a photo of deku, katsuki and eijirou all together.
‘they know something.’ one reads. ‘the boys, izuku’s friends.’ says another.
a chill runs down your spine, your body not liking the ominous wording or the idea that you’re reading a dead woman’s thoughts. a million questions race through your mind all at once while you dart up the stairs and to your room, snapping pictures of the notes just in case— sending them to your laptop. just in case.
they were hidden for a reason, tucked behind one of your happiest memories in hopes that you’d…find them? perhaps? you can’t figure out for the life of you what they mean, why your mother wrote them or her motive to have tucked them away…but what you do know, is that something doesn’t feel right about them. that something tells you that she might have been right about izuku‘s death being somewhat suspicious.
you can’t help but dwell on the thought, even up until you’re tucked into bed, an idea for the startling line of your book coming to you once you finally manage to drift off.
‘my life, is a complete and utter fucking mystery. and you’re going to help me solve it…’
apparently, being simultaneously ghosted and pissed off makes you write a whole lot faster.
it’s been a few days since the stand-off outside your house between the two men you’ve somehow gotten yourself involved with— resulting in you getting ghosted by both of them. bakugou, mostly because you don’t have his number. and kirishima? well he’s just been a prick. since beginning his work on the house he’s probably said all but twenty words to you— clearly still riled up by the fact that you’ve slept with someone else.
fuelled by your annoyance at the two, you’d managed to make a breakthrough on your book and kept yourself hauled up in your mom’s old room, writing away while staying to oversee repairs on the house for a little while longer. it’d been at least two weeks since everything went down.
silence and the sound of your fingertips married to your keyboard have been your only friends since eijirou started to ignore you— not that you mind, they were great company growing up too. with more than three pages filled with the intricate details of your early life, your birth, your first crawl and then your first walk, you decide to take a break from your work before delving deeper and head for a piping hot shower.
the water soothes your tense muscles, washes away the fear and anxiety you’ve felt since discovering your mother’s notes and trying to figure out what they mean. lathering up, you scrub at your skin until you feel clean of any discomfort and mystery clinging to it before the water suddenly runs cold— acting as a shockwave that runs through your system.
it forces you to begrudgingly send a text to eijirou, asking him to fix the shower while you work and he sends a quick, disinterested reply of ‘sure.’ as you towel yourself dry for his arrival. he’d wanted to do some repairs to the house anyway.
you’re lucky that the house is warm, waltzing around in nothing but an oversized shirt and fuzzy winter socks by the time kirishima pulls up in your driveway— a hot mug of coffee and milk between your fingertips when you open up for him. “coffee?” you ask him politely as if the redhead is a stranger, closing the door behind him as he kicks the ice from his boots and sets his toolbox down.
“is it black?”
“no.”
“then yeah, i’ll have one.”
he’s still being cold, a bit of an ass— but perhaps you can’t really blame him. literal minutes before bakugou had shown up on your doorstep, he’d been asking for a part of you. telling you that he’d wait for you and you’d agreed after many years of being apart. kirishima had a right to be mad, but you were, too— nobody ghosted you. in the kitchen, you brew and sweeten up his coffee, setting it on the counter above his head as he works on the water source in the cupboard beneath the kitchen sink, tools splayed out beside him.
now, as you write at the dining table, you’re accompanied by an awkward silence, clanking tools and your fingers on the keys. every now and again, red eyes stray over to your bare thighs squeezed together ( from sneaking peeks at the way the burly redhead’s arms bulge with every twist of the water pipe with his wrench or whatever the hell it is ). tension layers itself thickly in the air, and you know eijirou’s been holding himself back when it comes to you, so you take this opportunity to try and get him to talk to you. to get the answers you need about the notes you found the other night.
“hey kirishima?” you call out to him as he stands up to finish off his hot drink, closing your laptop.
“hmm?”
“uh…” you pause, gnawing nervously on your lower lip. if you ask him now, there’s no telling how kirishima will respond, you’re not on speaking terms and as far as he knows, he doesn’t owe you anything. just like you don’t owe him an explanation on bakugou— who he doesn’t seem to like very much. “were you…you and bakugou, friends?”
kirishima stiffens— gaze shooting up from your thighs to your face, as if to read it. “why you askin’, dollface?”
“my mom,” you start, fisting the hem of your shirt between your fingers and fiddling with a loose thread. “i found some photos of hers, of the two of you with izuku…some notes too. it just got me thinking…maybe she was right about the accident and something happened, and i just want to know if you truly know anything about what happened to him.”
the red-haired repairman shakes his head slow at first, picking up in velocity as if he’s denying any thought that comes to mind— turning away from you to get back to fixing your water. “i’ll tell you what i told y’mom ‘n the police at the time. i don’t know anythin’ much about what happened to midoriya,” he huffs simply, grunting with exertion. “and look, midoriya, you and i were good childhood friends and … i’ve no idea why bakugou was hanging around us or in the photo from back then. so, maybe…just drop it?”
your face scrunches up sourly at his words, anger flashing through you. “drop it?” you snap— tone so harsh that both you and kirishima jump out of your skin. “eijirou, this is my family…i never understood what my mother meant as a kid. i didn’t get her pain or why she suddenly turned on me, but i feel like this is a sign, her way of reaching out to me after she—“
“after she what? died? you didn’t even care up until now! and now ya wanna go diggin’ through skeletons in the closet because of some…some note? blaming me?”
“that's not fair, eijirou! and that’s not what i’m saying!”
he dares to bite— baring his fangs at you like you do with him. “oh? so what are you sayin’?”
“that maybe there’s some truth to what my mom believed. that something really did happen to my brother…to izuku. to your friend.” you fight back, standing from your seat so fast that it flies back and hits the floor with a loud clang. “why else would she have hidden the clues, the pictures in the house?”
“why are you even lookin’ into this shit now?”
silence.
kirishima folds his arms over his chest, breathing heavy from all the yelling before he prompts you again. “why are you doin’ all this?” he asks, nursing your name bitterly.
“for my book.” you state, quieter and shamefully.
watching eijirou’s face morph from an expression of confusion to one of hurt, and shock, and betrayal makes you feel sick to your stomach— knowing that you caused it. “yer fuckin’ kiddin’ me,” he slurs angrily, brows furrowed and meeting in the centre of his forehead. “seriously? your brother died. and you’re diggin’ into his past, his death for some fuckin’ clout?”
“eijirou it’s not like that—“
“don’t you ‘eijirou’ me!” this time, the redhead roars so loud it makes you cower back— surprised that he would ever direct such a tone towards you. “yer not the only person who lost a brother. yer not the only person who fuckin’ grieved. stop sticking your nose in places they shouldn’t be and let izuku rest! do yourself a favour and quit while you’re ahead b’fore you end up goin’ crazy just like your ma—“
the world around you shatters like glass as eijirou hits you where he knows it’ll hurt the most. it’s like he knew exactly what cells and nerves of yours to target in order to cause you the most pain. before you go crazy, like your mother. the one thing you couldn’t possibly stand in this world, would be to end up exactly like her. to have driven away everyone, to be perceived as a freak who just couldn’t let her loved one rest in peace. you didn’t want that for izuku, and hell, eijirou was right. you didn’t want that for her either, in a way.
still, it doesn’t make his words ache any less— tears stinging at your eyes like acid or poison before you can even stop them, letting them fill the silence echoing between you both.
“fuck,” kirishima abandons his tools faster than the speed of light, brushing a hand through his red mane before striding over to you— lifting you to sit on the kitchen label and pulling you into his plush chest since you’re too numb to resist him. “‘m sorry, i— i shouldn’ta said that to ya.” his forehead presses against yours, his large hands parting your thighs to stand between them as he rubs circles into the swell of them— doing anything he can to bring you back down to him, to soothe your quiet sobbing. “‘m so fuckin’ sorry darlin’, dunno what came over me. what i was thinkin’. that was an asshole move from me.”
he goes on, mumbling apologies over and over again— but you’re numb to them all, eyes glazed over and mind blank…because maybe it’s true. maybe eijirou is right and you really should just leave it all alone.
you let him kiss you softly, a few times, gentle pecks against your lips until they’re brushed with unspoken forgiveness. because it feels nice to have him close again, to not be ignored by the only person in this shitty world who might, still actually give a fuck about you.
“‘m so sorry,” kirishima says when you finally make an effort to kiss him back, angling your head just right for him to lick at your lips— tasting the coffee on them.
you shake your head, letting your fingers tangle in his luscious mane— gripping him as he calms your frenzied mind. clears it of any thought. “it’s okay, kirishima, it’s okay.” you offer in comfort, even though he should be the one comforting you.
you let kirishima stay the night after he fixes up the water and a few other things— with it being too dark and the colder weather starting to pick up a little bit more now that the temperatures have dropped below zero. he orders takeout, on him, from a quaint little business owned by someone else you went to school with— someone who went by the name sato.
it almost freaks you out how tenderly he treats you after damn near tearing your head off earlier— spoon feeding you, keeping you tucked into his toned and blisteringly hot side while you watch silly cartoons to fill the space as you finish off your writing for the day. neither of you speak about the argument, nor dare to bring it up in fear of setting one another off again but you can’t seem to shake the suspicion feeling— debating whether or not kirishima has something to hide.
you have a moment to breathe when he asks to wash up before bed, and you agree, offering to make you both a warm cocoa so you can settle down for the night. though, when you return, you don’t expect to see eijirou hunched over your open laptop at your desk— seemingly clicking through files even though he’s fresh out of the shower, red hair dripping about the place and broad, bare and golden shoulders decorated with crystalline droplets of water, a pair of cotton sweatpants hanging low around his waist.
“what are you doing?” you ask hoarsely, using your voice properly for what feels like the first time in hours.
spinning around in his seat, eijirou looks at you with an expression that reads ‘a deer caught in headlights’, quickly clicking out of whatever he was obviously snooping in. “oh um— i was lookin’ f’some music, somethin’ romantic so i could set the mood for tonight,” he turns back to your laptop and pulls up the draft for the intro to your book, reading over it proudly as you walk up behind him and set the mugs of cocoa to the side. “then i came across this, and i know you said no spoilers but… s’really good. i like it, pays homage to izuku.”
kirishima lies smoothly, to the point where you almost believe what he’s saying— but a quick glance at your files from over his shoulder tells him he’d been looking through the notes and photos your mother had hidden, the ones you’d sent to yourself. “please don’t go through my stuff, eiji. it’s private,” you murmur, realising that only one of the files is missing, and you shoo eijirou out of his seat at the desk to recover it and password lock the data.
“s-sorry,” he seems apologetic, holding his hands up as a sign of retreat as you stand to face him once again. “i didn’t know you were that serious ‘bout that stuff, wouldn’t have looked if i had known.” you almost hate how timbre and hypnotic kirishima’s voice is— feeling as though you can’t be mad at or irritated with him for long; like he knows just what to say to get your mind to do a clean sweep and forget any wrongs he might have done. it’s hard to put your walls up around him, shut him out when he’s so inviting— cautiously taking you into his arms, his lips finding your neck to place calculated smooches along the path of it.
feather light, barely there as if the kisses never existed in the first place.
“i-i told you,” you reply, holding your breath— depriving your brain of the oxygen it needs to be able to think properly. “no spoilers, eijirou.”
his sharpened teeth come into play next, just barely puncturing your skin with little marks and bites between ever growing sloppy kisses, his spit leaving a warm shine against your throat. “alright, alright, no more spoilers,” he whines against your neck, heated breath coasting along your skin until it rises with goosebumps. “just…didn’t think that y’cared about yer past that much.”
writhing in his hold and letting eijirou push you back to lean against the desk, you whine back— sounding needier than he did. “i don’t… i just got curious.” you let your counter argument slip away from you as kirishima sucks a mark just under the shell of your ear, humming at your speeding pulse beneath his lips.
he uses a knee to nudge your legs apart, both of you growing more desperate— hungrier, the red haired repairman lifting you to sit on the edge of the table by the waist. “thought we weren’t supposed to talk about it, though,” he keeps going, teasing you and taunting you— picking you apart under his touch as eijirou’s fingertips ghost up your shirt to massage the swell of your thighs.
your breath hitches, lips parting in a quiet moan at every squeeze of your flesh— your own fingers curling in a sea of ruby locks. “eijirou…please,” you plead with him— wanting to hear anything but talk of your book, wanting to hear your name coat the inside of his mouth. you buck your hips up into nothing, using your grip on his hair to tug kirishima close enough for some friction, grinding your clothed cunt against his girth showing through his sweatpants.
“please, what, darlin’?” his words hang between a set of shark sharp teeth— ones that leave bruising marks against your skin while his hips follow your movements, pushing back and forth against your panties for some relief too. “what? y’want me to fuck you, is that it? that why you’re grinding this cute cunt against my—fuck— cock?” kirishima soothes what he bites, pink tongue peeking out between pearly whites to gloss over the inflamed areas he’s left on you, knowing that they’ll be more visible come sunrise. “say it, darlin— say you want me.”
“i need you,” you wheeze, at a loss for words with kirishima descending from your neck, placing open mouthed kisses along your collarbones, tugging the collar of your shirt down to give the same treatment to your chest. before he can go any further, one of your hands leaves his hair to tilt his chiselled chin up to face you, a neediness taking over your tone and desire spreading through your bloodstream. “come up here, kiss me.”
eijirou’s mouth is quick to melt against yours just as it has done many times before, his wet tongue grazing your bottom lip before forcing its way into your mouth— claiming you as his. his cheeks flame at his own boldness, while you surge forward and chase the dopamine high he gives to you every time your lips lock. your teeth sink into his bottom lip, daring the man to pull away as you drag the flesh away from him but kirishima is just as hungry for you as you are for him, hands sliding up your shirt and over your rib cage, thumbing the bare skin until you gasp— letting your tongues come together sloppily, lips slotting against one another in mismatched ways.
kirishima doesn’t stop the route of his hands under your shirt, letting them settle on the clasp of your bra before he pulls way— both of you panting for breath.
“w-what?” you grumble, nosing his face, missing his kisses already. “is something the matter?” you’re impatient, you don’t like waiting for something you feel you deserve. kirishima had been pining after you for years, there’s no doubt in your mind that he’s imagined having you like this for several of them so you don’t understand why he pauses, ghosting his fingertips under the curve of your breast where it meets your rib cage— marvelling as you arch into him subtly.
the repairman shakes his head, a slow smile tugging on the corner of his lips, as if he knows how much he affects you— knows that your body tingles with anticipation, craving something more than a few kisses and playful touches. “yer just so pretty, darlin’, wanna take my time with you,” he drawls, finally undoing your bra and letting the nylon material fall away from your breasts and revealing them to his hungry hooded eyes. “that okay?” rough padded thumbs press into your budded nipples from under your shirt, the cotton material only serving to make them more sensitive— you can’t even think straight to answer eijirou, writhing and shaking your head from a few simple touches. “c’mon gorgeous, don’t be like that. you wanna feel good, right? lemme take care of that.”
his voice oozes with condensation accompanied by gentle tones of adoration watching you react to him in such a way— it’s like your body knows to love him, to trust him even if your mind doesn’t and you whine out for him. “wanna feel good eijirou, i’ll do anything just—please,”
“awh, s’fuckin’ cute,” he laughs, leaning back down to kiss you hungrily, making his goal to swallow you whole and fill you with every ounce of lust he has for you. kirishima’s mountainous frame looms over you, chest to chest as his teeth sink into your lower lip— pulling back while you desperately attempt to lick up into his mouth and suck in his devious tongue. “god, you’re so fuckin’ cute, baby, taste so good, so sweet.” spit slings between your eager mouths, drool running down your chins the messier you both become and as he gropes and pinches and tweaks at your sensitive chest, your own hands make the trek down his muscled back— the dull edge of your nails carving a red streaked patch down his flesh as well.
your tongues dance messily with one another, a little out of sync for new lovers or the teenagers that you once were finally admitting your feelings for one another after all this time— truly proving to you that kirishima had waited. that there was no one else while you had been away, just as he’d told you earlier on. his hips rut against your arousal soaked panties, pressing against your fluttering cunt and riling him up beyond belief— both of you shudder as you practically ride his precum loaded tip, the dull head of it nudging your clit over and over again to the point where you’re scared you might cum to soon.
“eijirou,” you croak, needy and without shame— your soft hand darting between the bump and grind of your bodies to grasp at his thick, temperate shaft as it glides through the length of your cotton clad slit. “s-slow down…’m sensitive,” you breathe heavily into his mouth while both of you gasp into each other’s open mouths and share high-pitched moans, your chest rising and falling as if you’ve been running a marathon. his forehead, lightly doused with sweat, rests against yours as he pouts— leaning close to tug on your bottom lip.
his usually kind and bright ruby eyes are lust blown, the black in them nearly eclipsing the red colour. “but sweetness,” he whines, cock twitching in your hold as blood pulses through the pretty purple veins wrapped around it. “fuck, s-sweetness, ‘m barely holdin’ back here.” kirishima sounds like a broken man, more wrecked than you from only a little dry humping. his grip on your thighs tightens in anticipation, the broad and muscular man close to collapsing on top of you.
“lemme touch you,” you whisper, voice silky smooth and sultry while you work your hand past the band of his sweats to get a better proximity to his hardness. “make you feel it,” your gentle fingers explore him, tracing over the thick veins on the underside of his length before forming a fist around the rest of him— creating the perfect sticky fleshlight for eijirou to fuck. he hisses, jutting his hips forward into your hand while the air tingles with a newfound desire to be close— to forget whatever bad blood had brewed between you both earlier on in the day.
wet, slick sounds fill the room, acting as a personalised soundtrack to jerking kirishima off. he leaks copious amounts of arousal, white and loose from his bright red tip coloured in a shade to rival his hair and eyes. his precum guides the movement of your hand despite the restriction from his waistband, slipping and sliding up and down his dick. saliva pools on the palette of your tongue as you gauge the sheer size of your childhood crush— he’s huge, swollen and fat with an oncoming orgasm, with the seed that weighs down his balls that swing with each rut of his hips.
the wild whine that resounds from deep within kirishima’s rock hard chest makes your cunt quiver, your juices darkening the crotch of your underwear. all the while, the redhead ravishes you pulling your atoms apart and putting them back together with just his touch— running from your thighs, over your hips and stopping just below your ribcage, thumbs sitting under the flesh of your breasts. “pretty girl, you’re g’nna be the death of me if ya keep jerkin’ me off like that,” he stutters out, breath condensing on spit shining top lip. it makes him throb knowing that it’s him, that did that to you— using his saliva as his claim over you. “ohhh fuck, just like that…god, i-i can’t.”
you feel a little powerful, breaking such a big and strong man down into nothing but a resolve of pathetic squeaks and hiccuped mewls. though, you fail to remember that you’re just a puppet on eijirou’s strings— he’s the master in this scenario, his large hands moving up to cup the entirety of your chest, groping them roughly as the feverishness of hips increases. without a second thought, he tweaks your nipples, brushes over them with the heat of your palm as if to make you as much of a mess as himself. levelling the playing field.
though he’s hunched over you, kirishima falls like an angel with burning wings angel from up above and descends down on your clothed chest— ravenous teeth biting into your right sensitive and stimulated mound, hot mouth sucking on it while his free hand cruelly toys with the other. his strawberry tongue rolls languidly over your nipples, earning him those darling babyish cries from between your bruised lips and a squeeze to his dick— the sensation sending his eyes rolling far back into his skull. “d-don’t get too cocky, baby,” the redhead rasps nice and low despite his voice cracking like the slow burn of firewood. “‘m in charge r’member?” and he is, even if you pump his slick cock to your heart's content, he still dominates every corner of your mind. he still has mastery of your every waking thought, raunchy or not. kirishima owns you, whether you like it or not.
without another word, he latches back onto you— biting and sucking at whatever he can like he’s teething, marking up your raw and covered flesh like a man starved of his last meal. you don’t dare to think of anything else, drinking up the sight of kirishima’s wet and sloppy cock in your hands instead, sure that his sweatpants are tainted with the preview of his impending high, a charcoal coloured patch forming where his clear and stringy arousal seeps through the fabric and dirties your hands with salacious sin.
your watery eyes dart upwards to watch the man’s face, serene, pretty as he uses you…and in a way, you use him. a crutch for your emotional imbalances, a numbing drug for the pain lodged in your chest. eijirou kirishima is the visage of beauty that distracts you from the harsh, ugly reality of your daunting world— with fuzzy and contented eyes, ropes of his own drool connecting the roof of his mouth to his eager tongue and rose tinted cheeks that are coloured almost the same shade as the apple the snake offered to eve ( a perfect match ).
he’s forbidden, he’s a trap set out to get you— and you find yourself going against all the alarm bells ringing off in your head.
because you want him. you want to be wanted by him.
“can ya do me a favour, darlin’?” eijirou shakes in your hold, crumbling as your thumb glides over the oozing slit on his tip before you circle it subtly. “think ya can make me cum? be so fuckin’ good f’me, hm?” they’re not questions, more like candy wrapped order and you follow them blindly— led head first by his alluring voice into a pool of honeyed praises with each syllable running through your ears, sending a shiver right down your spine and to the tips of your toes. “got so much f’you sweet girl…fuck, wanna give it all to you.”
when you nod— desperate to please him, the corners of kirishima’s lips twitch up into slow sick grin that you know shouldn’t make you melt, should strike fear into your heart, before he kisses you tenderly, letting you know how good you are for him.
your free hand joins its partner beneath the layers of eijirou’s clothes, letting him fuck through both of your fists as if they’re the tight, velvety depth of your cute little pussy clenching around him. “are you close, ei?” you ask him softly, pleadingly with a growing appetite to see him weak above you. the pace of your fingers switches from fast to tantalisingly slow, and the changes in stimulation only serve to bring kirishima closer and closer to his high— his chest heaving and speech pattern slurred, like he’s losing touch with reality and the last remainders of his sanity.
it doesn’t take much for him to tumble over the edge, just a small whimper of his name on your cherry bitten lips has kirishima seconds away from cumming— hard. he pushes your hands away, hazy and swaying on his feet as kirishima takes over on tugging one off on his fat cock. “lemme see that pussy baby, need’a see her, w-wanna—!” his rambled words taper off into a strangled groan as you lift your night shirt high and yank your soiled panties to the side with freed hands— revealing your warm shiny mound to his greedy gaze. “f-fuck!” he can’t help it, how much he cums— white hot seed spewing from his aching cock all over your thighs, your shirt and your adorable twitching sex, so wet and sticky all for him. his orgasm shakes the mountain that is eijirou kirishima like an earthquake, and much like a rockslide, he tumbles over you— humping the creaminess between your thighs like it’s the last thing he’ll ever do.
kirishima doesn’t stop cumming, his heavy load thick and lubing you up while he pushes his milky shaft through your bare folds, convulsing over you on the desk as your pussy lips cling to him— tied to his shaft by your syrupy nectar and the remnants of his orgasm. “oh…eijirou,” you sigh, barely holding back your hips as they circle upwards to meet his, grinding your naked mound against his— the scent of sex beginning to hang in the fizzling air between you both. “w-we should grab a condom… or somethin’…” you add half heartedly, the rawness of his cock slotting perfectly against you replacing all rationale in your mind as you commit the feeling to memory.
“but i like you like this darlin’, so close, so wet up against me…makes me wanna fuck you raw,” kirishima says like a petulant child, blissed out and already throbbing with life again— gearing up for another round. “don’t you wanna feel me that way? lemme stretch you out, get nice ‘n fuckin’ deep…ohmyfuckin’ god, y’feel like heaven, baby...” just being pressed up against you like this makes his dick spurt tiny streams of seed, eijirou’s eyes screwing shut as he pushes himself past his overstimulation to grind into your addictive heat some more.
your jaw goes slack, muscles giving out on you as you collapse against the desk— an electric current of pleasure humming through your body each time eijirou catches your clit, pushing his milky seed through the length of your puffy pussy and letting it stick between your folds. “w-we can’t…” you weakly protest through your clouded judgement. “‘m s’pposed to be responsible.”
shaking his head, kirishima pouts down at you. “baby please…, please,” there’s no denying that eijirou knows his way around people, maybe a little more so than you. he knows just what to say to a customer to get a better price for his work, knows how to charm someone into doing exactly what he wants with just a smile. “won’t put it in, we’ll just keep goin’ just this,” he pants, slowly drawing his hips back until the only thing that connects him to your sopping cunt is strings of your mixed arousals. “we’ll get’cha plan b in the mornin’ too…please, i’ll do anythin’,” pushing back against you, it’s clear that he knows how to get to you, predicts your next move in every game of chess you play. so when he grins down at you dopily, noses your cheek softly and almost romantically, you can’t help but give in.
“p-promise, eiji?” you ask him wetly, with big bambi eyes and your lips caught between your teeth. both of you cry out in unison when the repair man reaches between your sweaty bodies to take hold of his cock— making sure to circle the bulbous tip into the swollen nub peeking out from between your folds.
he coos when your puckered and clenching hole gushes from the new stimulation— calling out to him, begging to be filled and fucked. “yeah yeah, i promise,” he says under his breath distantly, stretching his thumb up to spread your pussy, groaning from deep within his chest at the raunchy view. it’s a picture of scandal— viscous, treacle-like tides of your nectar, like dew drops on an early morning, run down the length of your slit and drip to the desk below.
no one would believe kirishima if he told the world he had you like this, and part of him selfishly wants to keep you writhing against his hot and heavy dick all to himself, anyway. “god…ain’t i lucky, got the cutest lil’ cunt in the world right here. all mine.”
“all yours,” you slur back and trip over each word, throwing an ambrosial and avid look kirishima’s way— telling him without words how much you crave him. “move, please.” your hands take purchase on the curve of his taut ass so that you can lazily grind into one another— your hips rocking fluidly like a boat on waves. you feel like you’re going fucking insane beneath kirishima, but god’d make him a liar if he said he didn’t feel the same. he chases after your sweltering, soused sex like a dog after a bone— pushing forward when you pull back and vice versa.
“baby…y’so wet, can you hear that?” kirishima simpers, his dick slotting against you perfectly, both of you moving with an air of vigour and restlessness— grasping and tugging at one another wherever and whenever you can. “so nasty, so sweet. s’adorable!” he praises you over the crude sound of your sexes echoing into the night air, each sugar-coated word running through you like honey in your system.
he cups your neck while your eyes roll back in an attempt to keep your blurry gaze on him, ensure that you can watch the man fall apart on top of you, so you know he only gets like this for you. so you remember you can only get like this for him. “you look like you’re about to cum, darlin’… must be so close, huh?”
the feeling of your orgasm twists in your lower tummy, the pressure building right above your pelvis at a painfully slow pace. a gargled gasp and the pinch of your nails into his flesh will tell kirishima that— though he’d earned it, tapping the weight of his shaft against your spasming pussy to test his theory. “mhm…so you are about t’cum?” he guesses, the vibration from his condescending gripes rattling you beneath him. “gonna make a pretty mess of me, yeah?”
“uhuh,” you sigh out, voice increasing in octave while your tongue darts out to wet your lips and the tips of your ears start to burn. “‘m right there, s-shit! don’t stop—!”
“don’t cum.” one second, eijirou’s teasing your clit— dangling your orgasm right in front of you like a carrot in front of an animal, the next he’s plunging the monstrosity he calls a cock deep within your warmth— letting her welcome him home all while telling you to fight your body’s instincts. telling you not to cum. “you cum, ‘nd i fuckin’ stop, you got that?” the way he stretches you out is delicious, stinging at the rim of your entrance with a delightful twinge of pain. he’s lucky you’re so fucked out, wet too, otherwise you would have chewed him out for forcing his hefty girth all the way into you and without a condom too. “g’nna hold it f’me baby, promise it’ll feel so much fuckin’ better…”
losing his composure, the repairman sets a brutal tone to the pace of his hips— jack hammering into your poor swollen pussy without a second thought, groaning loud and proud over the desk that creaks under the burden of your animalistic ministrations. “k-kirishima!” you wail in surprise, tears biting at your waterline, spilling out onto your salt licked cheeks. “y-you’re bein’ unfair!” everything you say is hiccuped out and warbled, shaken up by the forceful thrusts kirishima gives to your lush and goey sex.
“you’re such a crybaby, gorgeous, i—fuck— only asked you to hang on fer a lil’bit longer,” he snaps back through harsh breaths, throwing his hips back and forth, back and forth— cock smearing it’s precum along the pleasure spots on your ribbed and overstimulated walls. “thought you wanted to be my good little baby, now you’re bein’ a brat? now you can’t wait? such a fuckin’ pitty,” this kiri is meaner, harsher, but still tops up your lungs with a blistering lust in explosive shades of red and orange.
though they hurt so good, it feels even better too, there’s not a moment where you don’t feel filled to the brim with bliss, the redhead’s huge dick repeatedly jamming against your g-spot, lightly pressing into your tummy— at least that’s what it feels like.
eijirou is bigger than you could have ever imagined, but you should have realised that from the moment you couldn’t wrap your hand around the entirety of his cock. he’s weighted, chubby against the sugar-glazed stickiness lining your gummy walls the further he presses into you. if you squeeze down on him, douse him in your candied essence then kirishima shakes like a leaf above you— a mountain brought down to his knees by an earthquake as his uneven breathing prickles at the shell of your ears. the raunchy sound crackling across your brain like electrical static.
usually, the redhead is a man of restraint, patience and kindness— but he’s done holding himself back from indulging in the treasure he’s been hunting for most of his life. you. “i wanna move, darlin’,” he seethes through gritted teeth with your bodies flush and close, pelvis to pelvis when he reaches the hilt. your cunt clamps down on him so hard that he feels like he can barely move, suffocated by the selfishness of your creamy hole. he’s barely keeping himself together at this point, pulled another step closer to the edge by every ripple of your sex around him. “s’fuckin’ tight, almost like you want me to fuck you open…”
something on your face changes, the slightest twitch of your features indicating your desperation. your brows are knitted, lips parted and doe eyes dazzling bright— it makes kirishima grin, lick his lips like he sees right through you, right down to the cells and DNA that make up who you are. make you a needy little bitch who’s hips buck up to coax more of his pulsating, scorching hot cock deep into your guts. “i want you t’do whatever you want with me, eiji,” you hiccup pathetically, oozing nectar down both his thighs and balls.
“what a sweet expression…” he mumbles fondly, using his brute strength to manhandle your calves up and over his wide and toned shoulders— the pair of you choking on pitiful groans with how deep he gets. “y’makin’ me wanna kiss you again.” with both of you positioned like this, kirishima drops his entire weight onto you and pulls his length back from the snugness of your heat, simultaneously diving back in for a lewd and uncoordinated kiss. you yelp at the loss, but your eyes roll back when his hips surge forward and kirishima fills you up to brim in one powerful thrust.
the desk squeals louder than you do, overpowered by the force that eijirou used to brutally pound into you— fat drops of his precum beading along your ripe insides, the ones that welcome him home with every push and pull of your sexes dancing together. your pussy froths at the base of him, as does your mouth as it slots against his— sharing moans and swapping spit, tongues rolling over one another’s. it makes you twitch, makes you scale your nails down his back possessively knowing that he waited this long to ravage you like this, even if he’d lied and hurt you just to get you to take his dick.
“s-say it,” you fight through the thick drool on your tongue and the tears that burn in your throat to whisper to him. at first, the redhead doesn’t hear you— hyper focused on his large hands spreading your pussy lips apart so he can spit onto your mound, watching the crude mixture disappear inside of you. “eijirou.” you grunt a little more sternly, speaking over the wet pap pap pap of his dick plunging in and out of you. “you’re mine. n-no one else’s. you’re only like this for me.” cupping his cheeks, you pin his blood ruby stare onto you, watching as it softens only just.
kirishima falters, the rhythm of his hips stuttering just a little. “‘m yours, darlin’,” he says genuinely, wrapping his arms around your shoulders as if to keep you from slipping between his fingers. “f’as long as you want me.” he pulls at your heart strings, pulls little whines from deep within your chest, eijirou kirishima stretches you both physically and mentally beyond your limits to the point where everything feels so good that it hurts. you’re afraid of what lies on the other end, what waits for you after all this blinding and mind numbing ecstasy is over— you don’t want him to stop.
“i gotta cum, sweetness… ‘m close,” he huffs against your shoulder, wisps of his red mane sticking to your damp, sweaty skin. he shifts, resting a hand against the wall behind you for leverage— ravaging you with the last of his energy driven into frantic, hungry movements. “you r’member what i said right? n-no fuckin’ cummin’ until i say so.”
gone is your darling kirishima, his warmth replaced by the beast of lies and lust. “fuck…’m so close, gonna cum all over this lil’cunt,” he drawls loud enough to wake anyone in a ten mile radius, swaying with you in sacriligeous dance, speeding up to chase his own high. almost leaving you forgotten and left behind.
“s-slow down eiji, i can’t— can’t hold back if you don’t—!”
you squeal out, but he doesn’t care, lost in his own pleasure. “maybe i’ll fuck it into ya, fill you so good…” the redhead simpers when you sieze up and trap him inside of you. the dam bursts before you can push him off, his fingers shakily snaking between your bodies to roll over your clit as he creams your insides— potent seed clinging to every ridge and soft spot of your inner pussy.
tainting you.
ruining you.
“s-shit. sorry baby.” he mumbles, never letting up or slowing down despite how sensitive he is— rubbing at you until you’re rendered weak and useless, your own release crashing over you in a sudden wave. “c’mon…let go for me… that’s it, good girl.”
you claw at his back hard enough to draw blood the entire time. you want him to hurt, just like he had done so with you.
“pretty girl,” his voice cuts through the fog settling over your mind. “let’s…let’s get you cleaned up, yeah? do you wanna shower or i could grab a cloth and—“
it amazes you, how he can switch between personalities so easily— make an emotional mess of you one second and treat you like you’re the only person in the world the next. “i just want to sleep, eiji,” you say numbly as he carefully sets you back down, as if you’re made of glass.
he frowns, for only a split second, replacing it with a tight lipped smile. “at least let me take you to the bathroom, i don’t want you getting sick.”
“fine, red.” you oblige, letting the man lift you into his arms to clean you up— an uneasy sleepiness taking over you as you follow his command, helplessly once again.
if there’s one thing you know for certain, it’s that eijirou kirishima has always been sweet.
perhaps it’s in his nature, hardwired into each individual fibre of his DNA, to be as kind and as caring as he— like he was genetically coded from conception to some incredibly gentle giant. a man who would cherish his partner or romantic interest above all else, or maybe it was down to his two mothers and the way they raised him.
but being a person who’s experienced all sides of the dice, who’s had to read into the eyes of others to know what they’re really thinking about you— you can feel that something is eerily off with kirishima. despite the night of passion that you’d shared, succumbing to days, if not weeks of want directed towards one another— you still feel somewhat afraid. he stays over most nights, and you fall into the same routine in the sheets, waking up to mornings of regret and staring at the ceiling when he kisses the pulse point on your neck. you feel scared. like he might try to rip your lifeline out every time he does.
eijirou is sweet, you have to remind yourself when he randomly squeezes your hip during the day, passing by to work on repairs on another part of the house. eijirou is not bad. he would never cause harm to you, but the thought still lingers in the back of your mind every time you catch him lingering around corners; or following you around the house only to surprise you with affections that don’t feel real— don’t feel like him. perhaps kirishima was never nice, never sweet or never good— and you’re only just seeing through his gentlemanly facade.
your rose tinted window is beginning to crack.
if he hadn’t been so avoidant of your questions about izuku, about what you need to know for your book, maybe you could see past the true parts of him that begin to show. for now, you shift uncomfortably underneath his coal furnace heated limbs after another night tangled in the sheets with kirishima, his arm is slung heavily over your waist as you struggle to find your phone amongst the mess you’ve created.
the device chimes with two notifications, though early in the morning and you grunt with both annoyance and success once you pull it out from beneath your pillows and the screen blares blue light into your face.
mina ashido ( publicist beloved ) at 9:45AM: hey love, just checking in to see how the draft for that first chapter is coming along, gonna need an update soon x
reminders app at 10:27AM: izuku’s anniversary.
your vision swims, that sickly feeling of grief flooding your veins like thick black tar— suffocating you from within your own body. the anniversary of your brother’s death has never slipped your mind like this before, it usually arrives weeks before the actual date does, a mental reminder creeping up on you like that wolf in the children’s fable of little red riding hood— but this year, you’d almost forgotten the event.
the tragedy that changed the trajectory of your life forever.
maybe you can place the blame on your mother, like you do for most things, blame her for not holding on long enough to see another torturous year without izuku by your side— torture her for a little longer with the loss of her golden child.
it can still be her fault that you forgot, if you try hard enough. after all, she’s the one who decided to kick the bucket, too, making it all about her grief— yet again.
“that’s today?” kirishima utters from over your shoulder, voice laced with sleep with his gaze settled on the digital glow from your phone. you’d failed to notice him wake up, too engrossed in the notification to feel his movements around you. “are ya okay?”
shaking your head, you shrug and allow yourself to use the redhead as your crutch and as your comfort— no matter how confused you might feel about him right now, you know that he’s been through this loss too and deserves some solace like you do. so you lean into his grip as you speak. “i had no idea that it was going to be today either,” your voice is the most devoid of emotion it’s ever been. at least to eijirou it is. you look empty, feel lifeless in his arms and he hugs you close to try alleviate the shockwaves of pain running through you. “i think… i think i wanna go see him. his grave.”
“you sure? ya want me to come along or somethin’?”
“no, i should go alone.” shaking your head no again, you turn to look eijirou dead in the eye. “it’s been a while since i’ve been and i’m sure you go to see him all the time.” eijirou stiffens and loosens his hold on you— almost as if he’s revealing a part of himself that he doesn’t quite want you to see. taking off his mask as the rose tinted glass above you both threatens to shatter once more. “but we can do something together when i get back, a family dinner? like the ones we used to have. i think izuku would like that.”
“for sure,” eijirou responds quickly, perking up again and pressing kisses up your arm in an attempt to keep you calm. you almost hate that it works, that he plays you for a fool even though you know he holds secrets above your head. little white lies that he feeds you just to keep you sedated— you hate that at this moment, it’s still not enough to steer you away from your sweet old eijirou kirishima. that you don’t distrust him enough yet, despite what your dead mother might have believed about him and your brother’s death. “i could cook his favourites after ‘m done re-paintin’ some of the rooms today.”
you seemed to have forgotten that eijirou stuck around out of convenience to work on the house and not just to keep you company and ravage your body night after night as a distraction from your discoveries or anguish— perking up too at the mention of paint.
“oh, you finally picked out colours then?”
“mhm, though some are mostly different shades’a green.”
“why green?”
“t’honour him, was his colour after all.” kirishima says simply, checking your face for permission for his idea.
the colour green is supposed to represent health, the shade of life. your brother’s colour. and you despise that, how it’ll be immortalised in the walls of your childhood home… because to you, none of it is true. green when associated with deku means death, it means sickness, it means envy of the happy life others around you lead when yours fell apart as soon as he was taken from you.
green walls wouldn’t even begin to honour the person you loved most.
but it was his. it was present in his glistening and curious eyes, his unruly and wild curly hair. it was definitely his.
so, you push through the pain and you pull yourself together enough to offer kirishima a half-hearted and appreciative smile— instead of screaming the protests your lonely heart sings.
“thank you eiji, i’m sure izuku would love that.”
kirishima insists that you take his truck up to the graveyard. it’s a little ways away out of town, up one of the rockier trails where lost loved ones can quite literally rest in peace. overnight, it had snowed up to your ankle, and there was absolutely no way your little sports car-convertible had the strength to pump itself uphill in this weather. you weren’t sure if it was worth the risk either.
your brother was a sentimental person, that much you remembered. he found something to cherish in almost everything he touched, appreciated gifts no matter how big or how small— just knowing that you’d thought about him was enough. that’s how you knew not to splurge on the overly priced bouquets of flowers in the whiteridge gift shop, how you figured something homemade for his grave would be better than the half-assed and plastic-wrapped wilted flowers sold in the convenience store next to liquid gold.
so, with this in mind, you stop kiri’s truck just outside of the woods— trudge through the thick snow and black ice in search of something…something thoughtful.
wildflowers.
you gather sweet violets in the shade of a rich purple, barren strawberry for their delicate white petals and the gentle blush pink of butterbur. each flower, growing wild and unruly at the foot of overarching pine trees or huddled together, reminds you of him— the way his curls couldn’t be tamed, the way his star-spotted cheeks still held warmth despite the bite of cold in the winter seasons. they all somehow connect back to izuku. you don’t know how long you spend picking flowers as you make your way up to the graveyard, your fingers growing stiff with the frosty air, your nose sore and chest a little tight from the oncoming cold you’re about to catch…but you can’t find it in you to care.
izuku would have loved this, you know that, you can practically hear the quiver of gratefulness in his youthful voice— see the smile stretching across his lips and the fresh stream of tears in his eyes. ‘f-for me?’ he would have said to you. ‘t-thank you so much!’ he would have added. because izuku was not a materialistic person, he was not one for gestures of grandeur; he'd always want something from the heart. you can only hope that your small bouquet of children from nature is enough for him, enough to make him feel loved even while he rests.
you love him so much, you miss him more and you even hate him just a little— for leaving you alone so soon.
by the time you reach the top of the hill, melted snow has infiltrated your boots and soaked through to your socks— you’re shuddering, you’re teary eyed but you’re there and a little more ready to see his stone. kirishima had told you that he hadn’t visited your brother in a while, so the headstone might have needed a little sprucing up but when you arrive, it’s already clean.
there’s not a cobweb in sight, it looks like it’s been scrubbed of any grime brought on by the countless types of weather that falls upon the little town of whiteridge and there’s a bouquet of flowers that look similar to the ones you clutch tightly in your right hand sitting on the ledge— a box of steaming pork katsu right beside it.
izuku’s favourite.
approaching the grave, you drag your fingers along the engraved cursive of your brother’s name— brows crinkling and face sagging with a muddled lour. a twig snaps behind you and between the snowflakes that fall hard but slow, you manage to make out tufts of straw blonde hair poking out from beneath a thick cable-knit hat and a pair of blazing crimson eyes. “hey,” as he gets closer, you can just about follow the movement of his lips as words form around them, the man from the bar towering over you— his hand with a flask in it, outstretched. “want some green tea? ya look like a shakin’ purse dog.” bakugou offers so casually as if running into him at the grave of your dead brother isn’t the strangest thing in the world.
a beat of silence passes, filled only with the wind's wails— a symphony of pathetic howls and cries that only your mother could recreate. when you don’t respond, katsuki shrugs with the rustling of his winter coat and unscrews the cap of his flask, pouring a cup of tea out for you and shoving it between your nimble fingers.
he almost thinks that you’re frozen in place, before the piping hot mug thaws at your state of shock. “what the fuck are you doing here?” you blink up at him with snowflakes in your lashes, a warm puff of breath condensating on your lips from how much your chest heaves— annoyance and bewilderment rattling about amongst the sparse oxygen in your lungs, from being so high up.
bakugou looks at you like he’s holding back— pained as he debates on what to tell you. “it’s deku’s anniversary—“
“izuku’s.” you snap back harshly, correcting him, snarling and baring your teeth like a provoked and angry dog. “first the bar, then my mom’s place and now here. it’s like you’re obsessed with my family or somethin’. you don’t— did you even know him? my brother?” it’s irrational the way you speak to him, using your heightened grief to lash out at a man you barely know. regardless, bakugou stands his ground— let’s you vent at him over the steaming drink he’d been so kind as to pour you. “it’s not like you were even friends—“
but every man has his limits, his invisible line before the point at which he snaps. “that’s a damn lie.” he barks back a little too honestly and with just as much force, words piercing through the blizzard and your force field of anguish. “we were more than friends…fuckin’ brothers and i—“ everything he had planned to say, dies on the tip of katsuki’s tongue, lost in the wind as if he can’t tell you anymore. as if he’s too far over that invisible line.
“and you miss him,” you finish for him, gesturing to the small display of flowers the blonde had set up— crouching a little so yours can join them. “how…how did you know him?” prying gently, you think back to the photos of them that your mother had hidden— he and kirishima and your brother— and take advantage of the vulnerability clinging to katsuki like the heavy snowfall.
“we met at school, like everyone else did.” bakugou fixes his blood red stare onto your other hand clasped around the mug and nudges at it after a few moments, prompting you to take a sip and not saying anymore until the temperate liquid slides down your throat and earthy tones spread across your tongue. he notices it then, the satisfied twitch of your face amongst the wretched snow, and continues— knowing that you’re warmed up, doing what izuku would have done for you.
“he was the only kid that spoke t’me after the town practically fuckin’ villainised me. a freakin’ kid.” he laughs bitterly, nervous fingers tapping the cool marble of izuku’s headstone. “not that it mattered, was the drug addict’s son, all of whiteridge hated that. hated me.” then he looks at you, right at you— as if he’s reading deep into your soul and picking out the parts of your brother he sees in you. “‘cept for deku. he showed me kindness, hung out with me when other kids wouldn’t…”
“he even got’cha ma t’look take care’a me from time to time. s’why i stayed with her after everythin’. we really were friends,” the blonde continues, telling you this like it was a promise. “we all were. ‘nd i shoulda done more t’save him.”
perking up, you grab bakugou’s wrist. “if you’d done what? what did you say?”
“n-nothin’,” he yanks his hand back, walls building back up and sheltering his grief stricken heat by pulling his sleeve back over it. “i just meant, that maybe if i had been there f’deku like he was from me…he wouldn’t have died. not like that.”
to hear someone else take the blame you’ve been bearing all these years, to be gifted with the knowledge that they’d been loved and cared for by izuku too is enough to bring you to tears— and you can’t even remember the last time you cried like this. crystalline and salty droplets strike a hot and stinging path down the apples of your cheeks as you realise. you are not the only person this town wounded in the war, you’re not the only person whiteridge viciously chewed up and spat back out. for once, you are not alone in the pain that you feel.
you might not have remembered bakugou from back then and you might have even played your hand in his suffering, but if he truly meant a lot to your brother, then he now meant a lot to you too. more than a hook-up. a friend.
“‘m sure izuku would be happy that you came to see him today, you even brought his favourite.” you offer, reaching out to the blonde in the storm of grief— letting him know that he has you too.
“was gonna share it with ‘im, yanno just fer old time’s sake,” bakugou quips in response, relieved to have the topic changed. he fiddles with the box of the convenience store version of your brother’s favourite curry and passes you the set of wooden chopsticks it comes with before closing his eyes and putting his hands together to thank whoever’s out there for the meal. “but ‘m sure the nerd wouldn’t mind if i split with ya too.”
bakugou peeks an eye open to look at you from the side, admiring how the blanket of settled powder white illuminates your features. “i don’t think he would mind, izuku loved to share,” mimicking the blonde, you clap your hands together and thank izuku for the food, for the memories and for bringing you someone to walk through the rest of your loss with. “and he had this weird habit of bringing people together,” snapping the chopsticks and rubbing them together, you take a mouthful of the food, humming at the warmth that embraces you— as if you’re being held by your brother himself. “in the most unconventional of ways.”
you let the blonde take the dish and utensils from you— parting your lips when he holds another bite to them before feeding himself. “like gettin’ us to sleep together, sweetheart?” he chuckles, light and full of life— as if he’s feeling the same pain relief you are.
“alright hot-shot, this is my dead brother you’re talking about.” you joke back, pulling another sweet symphony of laughter from bakugou. “what’s so funny, hah?”
“you mockin’ me, sweetheart?” katsuki cocks his head at you, swiping a thumb over the corner of your mouth— wiping away some leftover sauce.
“what if i am, sweetheart?”
at that, bakugou scrunches up his nose adorably, nearly killing you in the process, and pinches your cheek hard— tugging the flesh away from your face until you apologise between fits of giggles and squeals, begging for the blonde to let you go.
the rest of your visit to izuku’s grave is spent in much higher spirits. you understand now what it means to share your grief with someone else. yourself and katsuki spend hours by your brother’s side, reminiscing, laughing and crying— drinking through the green tea flask to warm your souls until it’s finished and your fingertips are close to freezing off.
taking your fingers between his, bakugou rubs the heat of his hands over yours— blowing some breath over them as he tenderly looks to you between the slowing snowfall. “yer freezin’ up, doll,” he murmurs, pressing his lightly chapped lips to the backs of your knuckles. “do ya need a lift back t’the house? i think deku would have my head from beyond the grave if i left’ya to walk back on yer own.”
your shoulders raise as you shrink in on yourself, not because you’re cold…but because of the way the blonde looks at you. as if you remind him of all things good in the world, as if you’re special and important and all things wonderful wrapped up in a gift with a pretty little bow. no one’s looked at you that way for as long as you can remember, not since your brother at least.
katsuki looks at you as if you matter.
“uh, no,” you start, clearing your throat as you shy away from his intense stare. “i drove out here.”
“in that shitty ‘lil sports car ya got?”
screwing your face up into a pout, you send a playful glare his way. “you leave duchess outta this!”
“pfft,” bakugou sucks his teeth, but grins at you and facetiously pets your head, nonetheless. “whatever.”
“i took kirishima’s truck on the way up,” the blonde grimaces, visibly wincing at your words. “he insisted because my baby duchess couldn’t handle the snow and iced up roads…but if you drove too, you could follow me back to the house?” you explain calmly, pulling bakugou’s attention back onto you and not the fact that you’re so buddy-buddy with the aforementioned redhead. “kirishima and i are having a dinner for deku and…we—i’d love it if you came to celebrate him.”
the man before you doesn’t respond, still eyeing you with that same intense and calculating stare before he shrugs, slinging his arm over his bent knee. “what’s in it fer me?”
you smile at that, remembering his words from your night at the hotel. “a free meal and spending some extra time with me?”
“fine,” he says, standing and outstretching his hand for you to take so that he can help you up. “sounds like a deal, princess.”
“hey darlin’, is that you? you back already? i was just about to finish up with the—“
kirishima’s voice fails him when he notices you standing in the doorway to the kitchen sheepishly, your jacket folded over your arms neatly while bakugou shrugs his off from behind you. subtle scents of fresh paint and spices that once filled the room quickly become mellowed out by tones of testosterone and quiet rage that both men exude. “hi eiji…i hope you don’t mind but i brought one of izuku’s strays over for dinner…” setting your clothes to the side, you step forward to greet the now brooding redhead, but he looks straight past you— his face hardened while his usually sparkling ruby eyes darken with the clouds of an oncoming storm. “eijirou…” you whisper with a little more firmness, only to be shrugged off once more.
“what is he doing here?” he asks, keeping his voice short despite the anger skimming just below the surface of his skin, particles of the emotion vibrating against kirishima’s vocal chords.
innocently, albeit mockingly, katsuki tilts his head to the side— rows of his pearly white teeth on display as he smirks slow. “you got cotton between ya ears or somethin’ red? she invited me over fer dinner,” he juts his chin out to gesture towards you as you turn away from kirishima, exasperated with both of their behaviours. “‘m here to celebrate izuku’s anniversary.”
kirishima rolls his eyes and tugs on the sleeves of his green-chequered button up even though they’re already rolled up snug on his convex biceps. “celebrate.” he throws down the towel that’s slung over his shoulder, snarling his words with an incredulous tone. “you weren’t even friends with izuku!”
“shut the hell up, y’don’t know a damn thing, red!” bakugou fired back, equally as riled up as the other man in the room— his own wrath bubbling over like the soup kirishima has going on the stove. “talkin’ shit about friendships like what you had with him even meant somethin—“
“oh, i call bullshit, bakugou.”
“yeah? ya sure that stencha shit ain’t comin’ from you?”
you feel as though you’re in the middle of a war zone, dazed and confused at the two people who seemingly meant a lot to your brother ( as far as the picture you had of them went ). they fire worded missiles and shrapnel insults at each other, not caring that you stand in the middle of no-man's land, seconds away from being hurt— too caught up in whatever conflict that’s brewed between them over the years.
“will you two just shut it?” you screech into the midst of the battle, eyes screwed shut and fists balled at your sides. “what’s the matter with you guys? arguing like this on the day your close friend died.” both men reach out to touch you, silenced and apologetic but you shake them off, inhaling deep to calm yourself down. “yanno, i have this nagging feeling that the two of you were supposed to mean something to izuku, that he cared for you both so…profoundly…and i have no idea what happened between you both, but i know that he would hate it— hate this.” opening your eyes slowly, you look between kirishima and bakugou with helplessness and a pleading gaze. “so please, just for today. can you try to get along for him? and if not for izuku, then for me?”
a tension lays thick and suffocatingly over the three of you, so much so that you’re sure not even the sharpest of butter knives would be able to cut through it. yet, slowly but surely, the redhead and the blonde nod their heads, grumbling out their agreements.
“yeah, of course, darlin’.”
“whatever ya say, sweetheart.”
though, both of them fail to admit that they’ve only agreed for a selfish reason— only agreeing because of you.
the rest of the meal goes without ( and you say this lightly ) a hitch, aside from the few snide remarks bakugou makes about kirishima’s cooking and the way that the taller redhead barges him back in response. they, at least, try to be on their best behaviour when you begin clearing up after your meal, three sets of dishes and cutlery all stacked up to the left of the sink with bakugou on washing and kirishima on drying.
“see,” you coo, watching the boys work dutifully side by side. “that wasn’t so bad, was it?”
passing a bowl to kirishima, katsuki shakes his hands of the apple-scented suds on them and grabs another, grumbling and he does so. “yeah, i guess,” he grunts with an irritated tick to his actions. “the food weren’t half bad, shitty hair.”
“neither are you, asshole.” the other responds, running a tea towel over the water droplets on the bowl.
“what’cha say t’me?”
“what’s the matter, bakugou, y’got cotton between your ears?”
sighing again, you find yourself stepping between them both before fists are swung and break up the fight with a bribe. “okay, okay, while you boys play nice, imma go sift through my mom’s stuff and see if i can find a place to call for dessert,” you tell them, pushing yourself from the dining table to leave the room. “be good.”
and as soon as you’re gone, the claws come out.
keeping his voice low, eijirou is the first to pounce, practically tossing the dish he was drying into a nearby cupboard to point an accusing finger in your other companion’s face. “the fuck is yer game, bakugou? what the hell are you doin’ here? we promised to never speak to each other ag—“ the bulking redhead hardly ever gets like this, hardly ever feels the urge to put his hands on someone else— thats not how he was raised…but looking at the blonde before him drives him crazy and up the walls, his piping hot blood carrying vexed hormones straight through the logic in his brain.
“you think i wanna be here, red?” katsuki snaps back and cuts his rival off with stinging words, bearing his fangs, showing the pink of his gums. “the only reason i came was for her.” that much is true, after everything that’s happened between them, katsuki bakugou wouldn’t have been caught within a ten mile radius of this red haired jerk.
“her? since when did ya give a fuck about anyone aside from yourself?” the whole idea is entertaining to kirikshima…the idea that the brooding blonde could possibly care for someone outside of his own being. it’s practically laughable, a joke so unheard of anyone would cackle the first time they heard it.
scrunching up his nose, nostrils flared—bakugou jeers back at the younger male, throwing the sponge he’d been using to wash up into the sink in a fit full of pent up irritation “yanno that’s real fuckin’ rich comin’ from you, asshole.”
eijirou hisses back, refusing to back down in this fight for who’s right. “fuck you, katsuki, you were never supposed to come back, you got some damn nerve bein’ around her.”
“well unlike you, she’s got more reason t’trust me over anyone else in this fuckin’ town! even over you. ya don’t deserve her, you don’t deserve half the shit you got.” katsuki’s words are like acid, singeing right through eijirou’s supposedly unbreakable skin. they hit him right where it hurts the most, in his strong heart that beats for you. the girl he’s loved since before he even really knew what that meant and what it entailed.
eijirou moves before he thinks, acting on instinct as his fist suddenly collides with katsuki’s face— stunning them both. bakugou barely has time to recoil, blood oozing thickly from his now busted lip before the redhead grabs him by the collar— seething directly in his face. “and you do?” he whispers through gritted teeth. “you’re nothin’ but a lowlife, a sad lil’ man livin’ on the out-skirts of town ‘cause no one’s given a fuck ‘bout’ya since your precious old lady died.” the back and forth between the two men never dies down, like a continuous game of tug of war with both of them pulling as hard as they can, giving the other burns from the rope in the process.
seeing who can cause the other the most pain.
“you take that shit back, eijirou. she was like a mother to us. you know that.” bakugou’s voice wobbles, near crying out like a wounded animal.
“ah, so you’d still defend the woman, even after everything she put her through.” your childhood friend, he’s talking about you and the suffering your mother put you through— but neither man can tell if it's because he cares for you, or if it's to put the blonde through another round of mental agony.
“and you’d still keep on lyin’ to her, even if it meant costin’ her feelin’s instead of tellin’ her the truth!” he barks venomously.
“what truth?” interjecting softly, you re-enter the kitchen with your phone in hand, the dial tone echoing from the device. “who’s feelings?”
bakugou is the first to say your name. “you’re back.”
“y-yeah, i found a place to order from…i just came to ask what either of you wanted,” you trail off. “what’s going on, you guys?’
you must look scared because both men relax their stances, worry cascading over two sets of features. “n-nothin’ gorgeous, we were just talkin’, s’all good,” kirishima says, using that sickly sweet tone that makes your skin crawl, the one he uses to play pretend and act like nothing’s wrong. “right, bakugou?”
the blonde looks over eijirou with disbelief, failing to fall for his nice guy facade where you usually do. “fuck you.” he spits, pushing kirishima away from him. “fuck this shit, ‘m leaving.”
“w-wait, katsuki!”
“i shouldn’t have even come here,” he brushes you off, grabbing his coat as he curses under his breath. “i knew this shit was a bad idea, can’t fuckin’ be around him when he lies like that.”
eijirou moves to defend himself, but you catch katsuki by the sleeve desperately, searching his face for answers. “eiji wouldn’t lie to me...and please, stop being vague, i just want to know what’s going on,” you exclaim, equally as desperate as when you’d grabbed ahold of him.
“get off’a me!”
“don’t talk to her like that, bakugou.”
“i thought i told you, shitty hair, fuck. off.” katsuki froths like a rabid dog, pulling away from you both.
reaching out for him again, you try your best to plead with the man from the bar. “what’s the truth? eijirou would never lie to me!”
sparing you a glance, his eyes bore deep into your soul, reading you— looking for something you can’t see. “do ya trust him?” you hang back before nodding ‘yes’ in response. “do ya trust me?”
your throat bobs, an uncomfortable soundlessness feasting on the oxygen in the room. do you trust him? “i-i…” you hesitate to admit your truth. “i hardly know you, bakugou. kiri…he— we grew up together, he’s always been there for me.”
“and where was he these last couple years, hah?” bakugou laughs coldly when you don’t reply. “exactly. but that don’t matter, does it? as long as he puts his dick in ya t’keep y’quiet at night, you’ll keep on believin’ whatever bullshit he feeds you, ain’t that right, sweetheart?” he sends a heated glare over your shoulder. “right, kirishima?”
“i think you need to leave.” the other male voices from behind you, stern, level.
bakugou looks back down at you, waiting for you to wake up, offering you his metaphorical hand to shake yourself from this nightmare…but no matter what suspicions you hold to kirishima— you know him. you’ve known him all your life, and you’d be a fool to pick a stranger over him.
bakugou takes your silence as his answer, and scoffs in sad mixture of disappointment and amusement. “fuckin’ figures. yer just like ‘em, everyone else in this shitty fuckin’ town.” he turns on his heel, marching out of the room before you can even stop him, slamming the front door to your mother’s house as he makes his own way out. “i hope yer makin’ the right choice,” he adds as he goes, the words echoing down the halls eerily. as if its a warning.
eijirou is quick to swaddle you in his candied, overbearing affections, wrapping his arms around you from behind— his chin resting on your forehead while you tremble from hurt. from fear. “‘m sorry, pretty girl,” he says, breath just tickling the shell of your ear. “i shoulda warned ya, kept ya away from him. that bakugou’s no good. the whole town knows that.”
ripping yourself from your childhood friend’s grip, you glower up at him— the look on your face is enough to put him six feet under. “what makes you think anything the town thinks of people is the least bit true?” you hiss, unimpressed.
“woah, hey! i’m not the bad guy here…” kirishima throws his hands up in defence, confusion taking residence on his face— evident in the crease between his brows and the downturned corners of his lips. “his parents did drugs yanno, he was practically raised by himself! you don’t know what kinda things guys like him get up to!”
“i practically raised myself! you have no fucking clue, eijirou! no clue what it was like for me or for him!” you’re screaming now, hot all over— so angry that you can feel the lump in your throat telling you that you’re about to cry. “does that make me bad? does that mean i deserved the way this town treated me?”
“n-no, darlin’ that’s not what i meant!” he tries to coo at you, tries to hold you again— but all you feel is disgust, betrayal towards him.
your head pounds, a migraine brewing at the back of your mind like a thunderstorm over the horizon. maybe everything you’d found, the letters and pictures from your mother had been a sign. a warning. trust no one, believe nothing but your intuition. “i want you to go.” deadpanning, you circle the sides of your head with two fingers in order to alleviate its ache. everything both bakugou and kirishima had said has your mind a whirlwind of a mess, like the aftermath of a hurricane and just having eijirou near makes your head hurt even more. “i need you to go.”
“baby…please, i didn’t mean it. t’mess this all up. what i said…i—“ the repairman attempts to reason with you, but you resist yet again.
“please!” you scream until you feel like your throat is bloody and raw, tears glimmering in your rain-clouded eyes. “just leave me the fuck alone!” from here, kirishima is quick to gather his belongings as you continue to scream and scream, following after him. “don’t come back, don’t call unless you’re going to be useful and fix this damn house instead of lying to me!”
you don’t stop yelling until he’s out of your childhood home, in his truck and halfway down the drive.
you don’t stop crying until you know that he’s gone for sure.
nothing stops hurting until you crawl into your mother’s bed, wrap yourself in the sheets that smell like her and fall asleep to the warm memories of her, yourself and izuku back in your happier days.
and you swear, right before you drift off, you feel them both embracing you— telling you that the truth will come out and that it’ll all be okay.
some questions are best left unanswered.
its a common saying that you used to believe. you’d scream it at your mother all throughout your teenage years, begging her to open her eyes and see that you were suffering behind her cloud of desperation to uncover what had happened to your brother. but the longer you spent in the clutches of white ridge, the less faith you had in the saying— there were too many questions, too many puzzle pieces that fit together to paint the perfect picture. something happened here, that both kirishima and bakugou refuse to tell you, despite all the signs and odd behaviours that lead to them.
curiosity killed the cat.
you think you understand that one a little better now. your inquisitiveness and investigative nature will be the death of you. you need to find out what truly happened to izuku midoriya, the urge to uncover any ounce of the truth spreading through your body like a virus, your bloodstream teeming with the deadly infection known as said curiosity. it rots at your brain, sitting at the back of your mind like a heavy weight that stops you from concentrating on your original task. your book.
a few deys after your dumpster fire dinner for deku, mina had sent you the edits she’d made on the beginnings of your transcript. it wasn’t enough, she’d told you more or less, you needed something more captivating and in depth. your work just wasn’t enough. the thousands of words you’d poured your heart and soul into, every little raw and scalding detail of your early years deemed uninteresting in a matter of small and yellow highlighted notes. no matter how much digging you’d done, no matter how many pictures of them boys you’d uncovered— it wasn’t enough.
“fuck that,” the cursor on your laptop and google doc flashes at you mockingly, daring you to type up more words that’ll only be obliterated by your publicist. you can’t write like this, with so much on your mind so you slam the lid of your device shut and rush yourself to get ready. there’s somewhere that you need to be, some questions that you need answered, no matter how much of a risk the truth may cause to you.
to your destination, you take more hidden photographs that you’d uncovered beneath your mother’s mattress, ones of eijirou and katsuki, their arms around the shoulders of your shorter and youthful older brother. their smiles had been wide, eyes innocent and much unlike what you see in them today. on the back of the glossed papers, you find hand written messages— a list of belongings owned by your brother that had never been returned, friendship marks of tiny hearts on their inner wrists that indicate a lifelong bond.
a bond that’s seemingly fallen to pieces, leaving you with clues to solve the mystery the shattered glass has left behind.
anxiety blossoms in the soils and flesh of your chest cavity once your car pulls up outside the whiteridge police station, it grows faster than you can keep up with, fertilised by the blood rushing through your ears and your levels of cortisol, the stress hormones, that spike. you remember it vividly, memories of frequent visits and damp questioning rooms and jingling handcuffs rush forth in your mind— making you swing open the door to the driver’s side in fear that you might throw up out of nervousness.
you feel your inner-child recoil with a hunger to escape with each step you take into the police building, remembering the hours you spent sat against PVC covered chairs in the waiting room, listening to your mother sob and plead for investigators to re-open izuku’s case.
you think about how she died without being able to rest, without bringing justice to her son.
you feel guilty for putting the blame on her for all these years too.
with a shaky breath, you approach the front desk and the officer behind it, coughing to grab their attention. “hi,” you mumble your name softly, leaning against the cool varnished wood for some relief that combats the world spinning around you. “i need to look at a case file? whatever you have on the midoriya incident.” you give him the date too, stumbling over the exact day and month.
“sorry lady, but that case has been closed for years,” the officer, officer monomania, drawls— grey eyes dragging lazily up and down your frame. “since before i started workin’ here, and we don’t give out scoop t’primp ‘n proper city journalists like you.” that same feeling of sickness from before crashes over you like a strong tidal wave and you grip the ledge of the desk to steady yourself. you wonder if that was how your mother felt, denied time and time again the opportunity to seek rectitude for her eldest child.
“i’m not a journalist, i have rights to the case,” you say simply, trying to keep the edge off of your trembling voice— this town has done you no good, chipping away at the strong walls you’ve built to protect yourself from all the harm it’d caused you while you were young. you may be from the city, you may not look like you’re from the quaint life of quiet little whiteridge, but this had been your home, and you’d be damned if you let it wear you down again. withhold the truth from you again.
standing tall, eyes darkening— you lower your voice to a bone chilling sneer. “if looking at me isn’t enough indication of who i am, then you’re going to have to listen to me very carefully, officer monoma.”
“i am one of this country’s best selling authors, the cost of my car parked right outside this building is probably worth more than every person in this shitty, filthy little town alone.” you’re tired of the world and the way in which it's treated you up to now, so you say fuck it all and direct all your rage at the one person who stands between you and your truth in this moment. “you don’t even want to know how much is in my bank account right now, and how little of a dent suing you and this place will make in my earnings. so i suggest, you take your ass to the back, get me the case file and whatever belongings you’re holding from these pictures and bring them back to this prim ‘n pretty fuckin’ author. y’got that?”
monoma visibly shrinks underneath your steeled gaze. “y-yes ma’am.”
you feel like you can finally breathe again once you’re back in the safety of your car, duchess, whipping out a bottle of water from the glove compartment and chugging it back just to wash the taste of bile out of your mouth. you can feel the weight of izuku’s case file sitting in your lap, scared to open it, scared to see what you might find— his belongings that they’d found at the scene fitting into a small ziplock bag, wrapped in a brown paper envelope.
using careful fingers, you flip open the file— eyes skimming over the report, the autopsy and the witness statements. it tells the same story that had been relayed to your mother all those years ago. izuku midoriya, nearly two decades ago, had wandered into the woods just outside of west whiteridge unaccompanied at mid-day, and passed away alone after falling into a nearby river. the autopsy revealed a broken ankle, blood bond markings on his inner wrist that were freshly made the day of his death, and his shirt and accessories tucked away into a nearby bush.
final ruling: accident.
the contents of the ziplock bag reveal just that of the report, and you feel like your whole world has come crashing down. izuku knew how to swim, izuku was smart— he wouldn't have just wandered off injured and exposed himself to danger like that. not on his own.
that’s not who he was, and it wasn’t fair for the world to treat him that way.
with the evidence now in your possession, and every possible route or bridge to the truth burned and fizzled out, you make your way back to the house at top speeds— fuelled by your emotions, aching to get back into bed and scream into your pillow about how unbalanced the world seems. however, on your journey home, you notice a familiar looking jeep, one that you know belongs to a certain blonde who you haven’t seen or heard from since the night of deku’s dinner.
you know that the abrupt ending to such a pleasant night had mostly been your fault, taking kirishima's side over bakugou’s was a bad move, especially after the scene you’d walked in on. they were both equally to blame.
for the millionth time since you’d arrived in whiteridge, you move before your brain can catch up— turning your steering wheel so that your car blocks up the middle of the empty, icy country road and bakugou is forced to come to emergency stop. “are ya fuckin’ insane?” he yells, hauling himself from his driver’s seat and slamming the jeep door shut with force. “i coulda hit ya, or worse, killed ya!”
is it weird? that even when katsuki’s fuming he’s one of the most beautiful people you’ve ever seen? cherry red eyes suddenly fiery while he marches over to your car, your ribcage dramatically lifting and dropping with your ragged breathing from behind the wheel.
“k-katsuki,” you breathe out when he opens your car door from where you’ve left it unlocked for him.
“jesus sweetheart,” his gaze sweeps over your face, eyes brimming with concern as all of his anger dissipates just from taking in your teary expression. “have you been cryin’? why the fuck’ve you been drivin’ so recklessly?”
his calloused fingers brush over the swell of your wet cheeks, and instinctively, you lean into his touch. “i wanted to apologise for the other night…i shouldn’t have put so much pressure on you and…” your voice tapers off, still confused by katsuki’s dynamic with eijirou and where they might stand today.
he shakes his head, offering you a soft smirk. “don’cha worry about that, we shouldn’t have put’ya in that situation,” shrugging, bakugou nudges a stray tear from your cheek with his knuckle.“‘m skippin’ town anyways, so none of that matters anymore.”
this makes you perk up, and not in a good way. “y-you’re leaving whiteridge?” you grab at katsuki’s sleeve just like you did that night, a silent plea for him to stay and not leave you behind.
“yeah, s’like kirishima said, i ain’t worth shit ‘round here.”
that's not true, bakugou has to know that. he was kind where the world had chewed him up and spat him right back out, he was honest where others were cruel and fed you lies on a silver spoon…and most importantly, he cared. for you, for your mother and for your brother.
he had to know, that at least to you, bakugou was worth the world and then some.
“you’re…you mean something to me, katsuki,” your hand on his wrist shoots up to his collar, tugging him down. so fast that bakugou has to balance himself with one hand on the roof of your car— his lips falling to meet yours in a gentle, pillowy kiss. having him like this, compared to the fast paced and rough nature of the sex you’d had before is like walking on clouds.
he tastes like caramel apples, feels like heaven and slowly but surely, he relaxes in your hold— noses brushing and his long golden lashes brushing against the apples of your cheeks.
when the need for oxygen becomes too much for you to bare, you look at him yearly, brushing your own thumb over his kiss-swollen lips. “i-i like you, and i’m thankful to you for being my support this past month,” you hum, sniffing a little from the cold. “don’t forget me when you leave, kay?”
“how could i ever forget the girl at the bar that night, hah?” katsuki responds like its a promise, resting his forehead against yours.
déjà vu is a funny thing.
as soon as your back hits the inside of the door to your mom’s place, you feel as though you’re reliving your first night in whiteridge again. katsuki’s all over you, having followed you back here after your rushed confession— both of you deciding to say fuck it all and have one last hurrah. he floods your senses, he’s all that you can taste as his tongue sloppily glides over yours.
he’s all that you can smell, the scent of burning sugars filling your nostrils— poking at the flame burning in your lower belly. his low moans vibrate around in your skull erotically, between your own gasps for air and the rustling of your clothes.
you feel him everywhere, his hands on your waist, the back of your neck and up your skirt, groping at the flesh of your ass as bakugou hoists you up, lips still melting against yours like hot candy, and carrying you to the living room.
in a pile of limbs, you collapse onto the couch which squeaks underneath your combined weight. katsuki briefly pulls away from the alluring prison of your kiss— he would have been destined to a life sentence if he didn’t— and rest his head against your shoulder for a moment.
katuski’s breath is balmy against your skin at the nape of your neck, and if you focus your fuzzy brain hard enough, you can feel his lashes there too. the steadiness of your pulse lulls katsuki closer, the blonde descending on your neck and whining at the taste of your skin spreading across his tongue. the man’s mouth is right against the column of your throat, and he’s embarrassed to admit, he’s had your body committed to memory from the very first night he’d touched you— knowing exactly which spot made you whine and which one had you arching into him too.
there’s an odd sense of tenderness about katsuki as his teeth graze your skin to paint deep shades of purples and blues against it— wet tongue lolling over any bruise he leaves.
he treated you like a flower left to fend for itself out in the cold, covering you with the heat of his muscled body while your nails scratch down his back and fingers move up to curl in the blonde baby hairs on his nape. “k-katsuki,” the syllables of his name tumble from between your lips wistfully as knocks at your front door echo through the shell of the house. “katsuki…should probably get that, s’probably kiri—“
bakugou who had above you for a moment, his palm resting against the arm of the couch swoops down before you’re able to finish your sentence, delving deep into your mouth, his lips moving feverishly as if to leave one last claim on you. “he can fuckin’ wait, can’t he sweetheart?” he chuckles into the sweltering ambience of the room, licking into your mouth to swallow any protests you may make.
kirishima finds his way into the house anyway, using the spare key under the plant pot to get in as he usually would if you had overslept on days that he came for repairs. or, more recently, when you’d started ignoring him after the dinner incident. he hadn’t expected you to let him in for his job today, but he did plan on apologising for the way he’d treated you up to now.
that is until he catches you mewling on the couch pinned down by the man he hates more than anything in this world, katsuki’s hand practically half way down your panties, rubbing one off on you from under your skirt.
“what the fuck—?”
“don’t get pissed ‘n calm the fuck down, red. you’ll have yer chance with ‘er once i skip down s’dont fuck it up.” bakugou moans into your mouth, showing off a little as he sucks on your sucking on your syrupy tongue. “so either fuck off or come join us, she’d love it. she needs it. don’cha baby, s’fuckin’ pent up, poor thing.”
stepping into the room, kirishima reaches the pair of you in three short strides— using a rough thumb and forefinger to tilt your head over to face him, luring you into a slow and sultry kiss with the flavour of a bad decision. the blonde continues to draw shapes into the crotch of your panties, faster and faster to get you panting and drooling into the redhead’s mouth. your fingers curl in two sets of hair, keeping both of them close to ground yourself and when kirishima finally gives you the chance to breathe, you shyly push their heads together as the temperature of the room rises to a scalding heat.
bakugou makes the first move, cupping the sharpness of eijirou’s jawline and bringing him into a similarly sinful lip lock, dragging the tip of his strawberry tongue over the seam of the other man’s plump lips. “gonna let me in, red? g’nna lemme kiss ya?” he slurs with hooded eyes and a predatory gaze.
“go ahead blondie, ‘m waitin’,” kirishima goads in response once they’re a breath’s width apart, not giving bakugou any time to dwell on the nickname before they’re kissing welty, all teeth and tongue in an uncoordinated rhythm.
“f-fuck,” you whimper between the two of them, thighs squeezing together as if to hide the slickness pooling in the middle of them— far too turned on at the sight of them messily making out in front of you.
bakugou laughs at the sound, breaking away first. “she enjoyed that, look atcha pantin’ so fuckin’ nasty, hah?”
“don’t be mean bakugou,” kirishima reaches between his thighs, giving katsuki’s growing hard-on a playful squeeze. “you obviously liked it too.” vivid and merlot eyes drip into something dangerously dark as the redhead palms your other lover faster and faster— dragging salacious moans from between stubborn lips with each precise touch. “yer rock hard blondie, practically drippin’ all over my fingers. c’mere darlin’, feel what a mess you’ve made him.” giving katsuki some time to breathe, eijirou guides the three of you to sit up— your frame pressed between the heat of the two large men before he guides your smaller hand to the erection twitching in the middle of the shorter man’s thighs.
“feel that? all that from just kissin’ ya doll.” there’s a hint of a smirk tied to the dips and dives of eijirou’s voice as if he’s mocking bakugou, gluttonously drinking up the way you gently pull bakugou’s cock out from his rough denim jeans— a wet patch formed at the crotch from where you’d smeared your pretty panty clad pussy all over him earlier.
now that you have him in your grasp, you can already tell the difference between the two and their cocks. where bakugou is longer, his tip a shade of terracotta though slightly flushed from him being so aroused, kirishima is chubbier, his tip usually a bright red— harder to stretch around in a way that causes you to remember his delicious burn when pushing into you. bakugou is pretty and kirishima is monstrous. both make your mouth water.
glancing over to the blonde, you drag your soft fingertips over the slit on his bulbous cockhead— rubbing a thumb through it a little more confidently when he exhales deep through his nose and his tip lip twitches upward, his eyes fluttering shut. “shuddap, kirishima,” he snarls, though the insides of his mouth are coated with a quiet moan just for you. “feels good baby, such a tease. you gonna keep playin’ with me or are ya gonna get me off like the good lil’girl i know you can be?”
the air of nonchalance about him, despite how bakugou throbs in your hold, has your stomach in desire laced knots— an innate urge to make him feel good taking over you. “fuck that’s good,” he mumbles, opening one eye to look at you, a carnal lechery simmering between the flecks in them as you slowly start to flick your wrist and jerk him off. you smile to yourself after spitting down onto his dick, watching it bob in response before the frothy mixture disappears into his pre that helps guide your hand up and down his shaft.
“awh, come now gorgeous,” kirishima sighs darkly from your other side— again using a soft touch, which contrasts starkly with his rough hands, to pull your focus onto him by cupping your chin. “can’t let the two of you have all the fun. i want some attention too,”
eijirou makes you watch as he fiddles with his belt buckle to get to his own length— he doesn’t kiss you like you want him to, holding it against you until his girth is free, pinkish tip bleeding with milky arousal as he stands tall and proud, smearing precum against his shirt that covers his tummy. the redhead is cruel as he brushes his lips over yours, goading you, coaxing you to take a hold of him and give him the same treatment as a blissed out katsuki on your other side.
you fist what you can— tiny fingers barely fitting around the entirety of kirishima… but lewd squelches from both of your hands around two cocks only serves to spur you on, making lust bubble hotly under your skin. you alternate between the two boys, thumbing at katsuki’s slit while you squeeze eijirou, drinking up their moans and the way their hips keen into your touch— giving them attention in different ways. and even with them both a wreck between your sticky fingertips, the duo still find ways to dominate you…make you feel like a treasured fuck toy even though they’ve yet to touch you themselves.
kirishima noses up the side of your neck, as if the very scent of you drives him wild and sucks his claim into your skin, grazing you with the tips of his pointed pearly white teeth. “don’t stop now, angel,” he rasps, the hint of a smirk rippling throughout his voice when your breath hitches at the sultry contact. “keep goin’…makin’ us feel so good,” you can’t help the way your body twitches to follow his command, speeding up your gentle fists around them, both sets of your knuckles coated in stringy opaque. “would…fuck, hate to see what happens if you get too distracted…”
the redhead’s mouth is back on yours before you can register his shift in movement, tongue dragging over the chapped skin of your lips, twisting around your own. “thas’ right baby, s-shut him up…mmm fuck, feels fuckin’ good,” katsuki slurs, blending his words together messily. he’s red in the face and hot to the touch, fiercely bucking his hips in an attempt to keep up with you jerking him off. the softness of your palm messes drastically with the chemistry of the blonde’s brain— altering it’s levels of dopamine until they’re sky high and katsuki feels as if he’s just high off of wanting you. “y’talk too much red, why can’t ya just moan pretty like her, hah?”
crimson cut and covetous eyes flutter open, drifting over to where you play with kirishima too and bakugou would be lying if he said the sight didn’t make him hornier, the glint of your hands covered in arousal causing him to swallow thickly. eijirou grins against your lips, reluctantly letting you free from his sinful hold to cock his head over at your blonde lover. “katsuki, you’re hard as a rock just from watchin’ me with her, d’ya really need to hear me moan for you too?”
“bet you’d sound like a pretty lil’ bitch too.”
“alright,” kirishima hums, finding your mouth again and hisses into it— as if relieved to be making out with you once more. this time he presses his fingers between your thighs, prying them open with a growl when you resist a little. “c’mon sweet thing, lets put on a show f’him, yeah?” the biology of your body tells you that you have no choice, blindly following his domineering lead and falling in tune with eijirou as he guides you into lifting your hips and tears off your skirt and panties in one go. “yeah that's it… you’re so cute, doll, moan a little, tell us who’s makin’ you feel good…”
at first, he spreads your swollen pussy lips apart to give your other lover a nice, nasty view of your juices that slide between them— his eyes goad you, tell you what to do as you quiver and the pad of his thumb slips over your budding clit. “k-katsuki! f-fuck!” you cry out, like the song of an angel, at the same time bakugou groans from deep within his chest.
“look at you baby, grindin’ all over red like that, so fuckin’ pretty,” his breath stutters, cock throbbing and spurting pre in your hold.”‘nd what ‘bout you, red? gonna whine like that for me too?”
kirishima only scoffs, spitting onto your dripping mound and watching as the frothy mixture slowly slides between your folds. he’s quick to gather it up before it hits the couch or your ass, dragging his fingers over your hole as if to push the mixture into you. the very feeling makes you jolt, one hand jumping up and into tousled red locks— pulling on them hard to ground yourself during your spiralling desire and neediness. all the while, you never let up on pleasuring eijirou, though your fist tightens around kirishima’s shaft, as if to mimic your fingers clenching down hard on his thick fingers working their way inside of you.
“katsuki!” eijirou quite literally whimpers, the sound high-pitched and breathy— surprising both you and bakugou.
bakugou hums cruelly, content with the pair of you calling out for him, toying with one another like cute little sluts just for his amusement. “both of ya need me that badly, huh?” he coos, pulling your hand off of his dick to suck your tiny fingers into his mouth. both you and kirishima watch like dazed animals as katsuki cleans you up, moaning hungrily at the taste of himself. “wanna see you play fer a ‘lil longer. eijirou, use your fingers…and you sweetheart,” the blonde recluse leans in real close, the scent of him mingling with the obvious tones of sex in the air clearing your mind of reasonable thought. “touch yourself f’me…”
the repairman at your side wastes no more time, sinking from beside you to his knees on the floor. kirishima swirls his digits over your entrance once more, threading your slick between them with a hearty grouse tainting his lips. “katsuki, he murmurs, looking up at your face from below. “she’s cryin…” and he’s right, silver tears brim in your waterline as eijirou slips a finger into you and immediately curls it against your slippery walls.
katsuki’s latched onto your neck now, marking over wherever kirishima might have with jealousy-rich blood pumping through his heart. “she can cry all she wants, but it better be from pleasure, red. want you makin’ her see fuckin’ stars,” he warms between licking and sucking at your salty skin.
kirishima marvels at the creamy, viscous mess growing between your thighs— amazed at how wet and tight you are while he pushes another finger in alongside the first. he’s eager to please, to explore you, blunt tips brushing along your most sensitive spots and even landing on your g-spot almost instantly.
“she takes me so well too, always does. there you go, darlin’… just like that,” you can’t tell who it is that krisihima is talking to you, whether its you, your puffy salacious sex or katsuki who’s mumbling sweet nothings and praises into your ear. but no matter which way you look at it, the desperate lilt to his voice seems to have only one purpose, and that’s to drive you insane.
bakugou can’t help but laugh in amusement as you fall apart between the two of them— exploding into a million tiny pieces and letting them put you back together. kirishima pumps his fingers in and out clenching hole while the blonde wraps his hand around your wrist and ushers your hand towards your clit. “touch yourself baby, wanna see you fall apart.” he hums, tongue darting out to wet his lips while you slowly trace shapes on your pleasure nub, blossoming for the boys like a spring flower.
“k-kats…e-eji,” you gasp at as the pair of them pick up their pace, bakugou using your hand to smack down on your sticky bud while kirishima bites down on your inner thigh as if its a fresh fruit for the taking. you bruise, soft like a peach, and he’s quick to soothe the pain sprinkled into your bloodstream with a roll of his greedy tongue over the inflamed area. “i can’t…”
“yes, you can.” the redhead grunts menacingly, the carmine in his eyes darkening with bloodlust while your cunt dribbles and drools into the seat of his palm. you’re close, he can practically taste it— salivating at the scent of your honeyed sex. “gonna cum for us, darlin’?”
your body flashes with heat, like you’re being swept up by an inferno and all you can do is nod weakly in reply— gasping for air, desperate for oxygen to fill your lungs instead of the smoky fragrance that the two men exude. “why don’cha let go for us, sweetheart? be messy, wanna fuckin’ see it.” bakugou adds on, tempting you over the edge with sadistic dip to his tone of voice. it’s low, hot against the shell of your ear and you find yourself unable to resist, giving in to katsuki as well as kirishima.
eijirou scissors his fingers one more time, just enough to get you where you need to be, and then you’re cumming— release crashing over you like a vicious wave amidst a raging storm. pleasure pulls you under, and your body is rendered useless between the two beefy men. shaking, writhing and trembling as bakugou slaps down on your pulsating mound to help guide you through the rest of your high.
“fuck…that’s hot,” kirishima comments wistfully, watching your orgasm trickle down his thick fingers, soaking your thighs. “i gotta…wanna…taste—“
a hand on his forehead pushes the thirsty redhead back, his blonde counterpart snarling in warning. “nuh-uh. s’my turn, shitty hair.”
the next few moments are a whirlwind, your mind still spinning and still heavy from cummings just seconds ago. you’re lifted into a pair of well-built arms, your face tucked into a sturdy chest and you’re not far gone to know who is who. footsteps trek along the creaky floorboards of your childhood home, and you’re familiar enough with the sound to know where you’re headed.
the bedroom.
when you finally come to, eyes fluttering open— bakugou is lying fully naked on his back at the head of your bed, his expression almost as needy as kirishima’s was earlier. “crawl t’me, baby, come sit on my face.” he purrs, chest rising up and down with ragged breaths as the vines of fervour have wrapped themselves around each of his ribs, taking root deep in his lungs.
before you have a chance to respond, kirishima ( who had been holding you this entire time ), unceremoniously tosses you onto the bed to join the blonde— nodding his head over to him. “go ahead, be a good girl for us.”
you make your way up the sheets, tossing off your top and shuddering as your now bare skin brushes up against the heat of katsuki’s. he welcomes you with a dirty, uncoordinated kiss before guiding you up to and over his face with a pair of rough palms on the globes of your ass. grabbing the headboard, you take a peek down at the ravenous man beneath you, nervousness flickering over your sweat-licked features.
“what’cha waitin’ for, sweetheart?” he mumbles, squeezing your flesh between his fingers in encouragement. “y’don’t think i can take it?”
shaking your head, your lips part in protest. “n-no, ‘m just—“
“sit on him,” eijirou barks at you like its an order, looking up from stripping himself of the rest of his clothes. “he can handle it.”
it amuses bakugou, how thin the other man’s patience has worn and he nips at your inner thighs to test the waters. “you heard shitty hair. sit.” neither of them give you much choice after that, katsuki wrapping his arms around your waist to drag you down onto his awaiting mouth. the entirety of his tongue presses flat against your slit, sucking the juices from them as he groans— sending vibrations straight up to your clit. “god…kirishima, she’s so fucking wet down here.”
“yeah?” kirishima responds huskily, kneeling on the bed behind you both just as you start to roll your hips back and forth across the blonde’s eager mouth. “how does she taste, kats?” the bed dips underneath his weight, with eijirou swooping down between katsuki’s thighs this time, instead of yours. “is she sweet? i wouldn’t know… you wouldn’t let me…”
his words taper off, drowned out by his own gagging as bakugou bucks into the heat of his mouth in surprise. “thas’ a cheap shot, red.” he damn near howls, stuttering as he traces the tip of his tongue over your slit, spelling out his own name and slurping on your lower lips. “fuck thats it… quit yer talkin’ and use that mouth on me.” when kirshima licks, bakugou sucks and each time, a symphony of salacious moans bouncing off the bedroom walls. katsuki alternates the pressure of his tongue against your clit, dragging the tip of it around the hood of the tiny nub in lazy circles before he forces it past your entrance as far as he can go.
high pitched moans that burst through the saliva-slicked seams of your lips mingle with eijirou’s gargles from deep throating katsuki, bobbing his head up and down in a steady rhythm before he uses an arm to pin the blonde’s hips to the sheets below. “j-jesus, bakugou,” he pulls off of him with a layer of precum coating his tongue, aggressively spitting it down onto katsuki’s seedy cockhead and making it shine. “you tryna choke me t’death or somethin’?”
“w-what? can’t handle it red?” even katsuki struggles to get his words out, ruby framed eyes disappearing into the depths of his skull between the feeling of eijirou pressing their cocks together and you, gushing all over his lips and chin, glazing in him in your arousal. “thought you were a big boy, thought you could— mmph!”
“shut up,” you wail, tears threatening to spill once more as you force your hips down on the blonde’s face and muffle his speech— ecstasy rolls off of your body in waves, hypnotising the two men who’ve only come together to make you feel good and reach high heavens. “both of you talk too much… i wanna cum.” you gasp out, katsuki’s tongue now wrigglingly against your ribbed walls, making the knot in your lower stomach twist and twist until your insides burn with pleasure. “want us to cum, together.”
chuckling from behind you, kirishima makes a fist around both his and bakugou’s sopping lengths— creating a makeshift fleshlight for the both of them to fuck into. he alternates his grip to mimic the clenching of your raw, puffy mound and his grin broadens against the bare skin of your shoulder blade, causing goosebumps to rise across the expanse of it. “i don’t think you’re in the position to be makin’ any demands, gorgeous,” he coos, slowing down his words as if to dumb them down for you. after all, the way katsuki sucks on your pussy, languidly rolls his tongue between your folds is rendering you thoughtless. your only feedback being made up of pitiful mewls. “but i think your little friend here wants to cum too. and i, for one…well, ‘m hardly holdin’ back here.”
calculatedly, eijirou shushes a thumb through katsuki’s milky slit— spreading the beading precum across both of their cockheads. this earns you the vibrations of katsuki’s whine against your juicy pussy, and the stimulating sound of the redhead’s breath faltering. all you can do is take what your boys give you, the heat of your bodies slotted together sending your internal temperature off the charts. all you can hear is the wet slap of kirishima’s hand has he jerks himself off along with bakugou, their crude mix of frothy white arousal slinging about the place.
they’re a mess, but you’re in no better state than your lovers. the ones that pull you apart with every suck, bite and pinch as you choke or heave and piece you back together just by moaning your name. your body cries out for another orgasm, bakugou switching between leaving lovebites on your inner thighs and nipping at your clit while you tug on his hair— harder and harder each time. your legs shake either side of his head, every drag of his pink muscle in and out of you, fucking you as if it were his cock— drags you closer towards cloud nine. it’s so close you can almost touch it.
katsuki’s hips rut up to meet the slide of eijirou’s cock back and forth against his own, his bright red and almost sore cockhead catching on the thickened blue veins that wrap around kirishima’s shaft. the repairman throws his head back, pearls of sweat dripping from his forehead and running from it, down his throat and right over his adam’s apple.
you jerk as that same and familiar feeling from earlier begins to simmer in your lower tummy, threatening to bubble over like a pot on a stove if you’re touched just right. you whinge and sniffle the closer you get, one hand raking through katsuki’s sweaty blonde locks and the other bracing your weight on the headboard as you throw your hips and sopping cunt down against his soaked face. “‘m gonna…oh god! think ‘m gonna—!”
connected by a heavy string of your clear, syrupy nectar that flows in streams from your gooey insides— bakugou pulls off of you with a lewd pop, panting for air. “she’s gonna cum, kirishima,” he mewls, lapping at you like a kitten. “wanna…fuckin’ cum with her too.”
“don’ worry, i’m…shit. ‘m right there with you guys,” eijirou sobs, biting down hard on his lip to suppress his pathetic squeaks, flicking his wrist faster, clumsier around their viscid and creamy cocks— desperate to get them both to the edge. “k-katsuki, b-baby!” the redhead chokes on the moan of your name, his orgasm hitting him first as his hot white seed spills over katsuki’s thighs and shaft. the blonde follows suit, back arching off the bed along with his hips as his potent load shoots up your back and adds to the mess.
he groans deep into your cunt, crying out your name as well, weakly. “oh fuck! fuck yeah…”
your orgasm breaks you.
blood rushes through your ears and static crackles across your brain— all that tension, all that ecstasy that’s been building up is finally released. your juices splash out against katsuki’s face, who gulps everything you give him down— three fingers on your clit, rubbing you in tight circles to coax you all the way through. colour dances behind your eyes and you squeal, and shake— collapsing back into kirishima’s plush chest as he catches you before you fall.
you watch contentedly and with hooded eyes, after rolling onto your side ( once again stuck in the middle of your boys ), as they reach over you to share the sweet, candied flavour of you in a kiss. bakugou’s tongue dominates kirishima’s, pushing into the hot cavern of his mouth in a nasty, hungry exchange— riling one another up even though you’ve all just cum. they turn to you next, with rose tinted cheeks and heart shaped pupils to pull you into the kiss as well. ensuring that you get a taste of yourself too.
now, with the three of you catching your breath against solid sheets, you find yourself calming a bit— letting eijirou trace affectionate patterns into your left side, katsuki beginning to mumble praises to you on your right. “did so fuckin’ well for us, sweetheart, you okay to keep goin’? you came fuckin’ hard.” he’s teasing, you can tell, a bright and lazy smile on his face as he watches over you— the only hint of concern you detect being hidden behind the brownish flecks in his eyes.
“i-i think i can go again, if you both want to,” you say bashfully, pressing a soft kiss to bakugou’s cheek before rolling over to give kirishima the same treatment. “i-i like having both of you fuck me.”
kirishimma laughs fondly, his dick twitching against your side just as katsuku’s does. “is that so?” he inquires coyly, rough fingertips dancing over your slick thighs while he locks eyes with his blonde counterpart— as if to send him a message. “i think we can manage a double stuffin’, since y’want both of us, right?”
“d-double stuffing?” you breathe, brain lagging as you process the words.
the sound of moving fabric does nothing to cover the sound of your heart hammering against your ribcage at redhead’s suggestion, bakugou already shifting to get into position— lifting your thigh and grinding his half hard erection against the wetness of your cunt. “i mean, that’s what yer after, no?’ he chimes in, licking his lips and looking down at you as if you’re nothing but a hunk of prey. “to have both of our cocks, fillin’ ya up’ta the brim. pluggin’ you full.”
“y-yeah…i do,” is all you can respond with, especially with the newer friction from kirishima sliding his cock against katsukis over your pulsating pussy. you gladly bask in their attention. “oh god, i do. i want it so bad.”
someone speaks, but as lust tremors through you like the aftershock of an earthquake, you cant seem to tell who. “then say please.” the voice utters.
“p-please! fucking, please!” you comply, desperate.
“atta fuckin’ girl.” rasps the other voice.
kirishima hooks your knee over the bend of his arm and you end up back to chest with him while bakugou takes you into his arms so that you’re chest to chest for better positioning. his caramel skin is hot to the touch like molten sugar, comforting even when you become hyper-aware of eijirou’s cockhead pressing against your entrance— groaning as he tries to ease past your tightness.
your nails form reddish crescent moons along katsuki’s biscep as you clutch onto him for dear life, still adapting to the stretch of the redhead behind you as he pushes deeper into your fluttering cunt slowly. “easy red, don’t want you hurtin’ her,” bakugou is gruff with his words and settleshis large and worn down palms on your waist, his thumbs rubbing soothing circles into your lower back to distract you from the burn between your ruined thighs.
“i know what she can take, bakugou,” eijirou snaps back, staggering for breath but stops his hips in order to give you time to adjust. “j-just lemme know when i can move, kay baby?” he’s only got the tip in, your hole stinging only just as it resists his intrusion. the slight twinge of pain is enough to bring a fresh set of tears to your eyes but feels significantly better than it hurts.
“s’okay kiri, keep goin’,” you croak and lean forward, too needy to think and capture bakugou’s lips in a chaste kiss. you shiver at the taste of yourself and kirishima’s lip balm on him too. the display of affection is aimless, going nowhere except for consoling you the more kirishima thrusts into you.
a broken moan reverberates between the three of you, planted firmly against the blonde’s lips when your red haired partner finally bottoms out, snug against your slick walls. “shit darlin’…you’re so fucking wet ‘n hot ‘n tight,” he groans, fidgeting against your back. “have i not fucked you enough? poor thing.”
you respond with a sweet little mewl, near purring at the feeling of kirishima’s girth sitting heavy inside of you— practically in your guts even though he’s only shallowly thrusting into you. he whimpers against your shoulder, his grip bruising against your thigh to the point where you’re sure you’ll have handprints on it tomorrow. “kirishima, ya idiot, did’ya put a condom on?” bakugou fumbles for your clit again, tracing his initials over it as if the added stimulation will help.
“no…you really gonna make me pull out?” he whines like a petulant child.
“s’okay, i just wanna…i need you. both of you.” you plead and cling to him, eyes wide and glittering— pushing back on kirishima and forth on the blonde’s fingers for some friction and some form of pleasure.
the repairman languidly juts his hips forward, smearing his new wave of precum along your ribbed walls, the sound of your laments and simpers syncing up with kirisima’s makes bakugou relent. “fine. but you better pull out before y’get close…” katsuki lets out a hiss, just as his counterpart grabs at his shaft and circles it around your stretched entrance where you and kirishima meet, a mix of your arousals making it easier for bakugou to slip right in. “damn…she’s so cute, y’gotta let me in baby, ease up…”
your body follows his command, relaxing as you slump between the two boys— mind too numbed and dumbed by the pair and their leaky cocks. you can barely move, only jolting with them whenever their dicks brush against each other inside of you. “move katsuki, wanna give her the fuckin’ that she needs.” kirishima pouts, losing his patience again.
the entire world spins, barely preparing you for the feeling of both boys thrusting into you at the same time. everything is so tight, vulgar and souse— neither of them wasting any time in pounding you to hell and back and the bed cries out under the intense and sudden movement, though it isn't any louder than you. when kirishima throws the weight of hips into you from behind, fucking you without thinking, bakugou pushes you back with his own passionate lunges of his hips too. as if they’re fighting for ownership of your spasming cunt.
you soak their dicks in your honeyed nectar as they pump into you, and bakugou grabs at your waist roughly to stop you from writhing about the place. he quietens his moans with love bites and kisses across your skin, your throat— pulling you down onto his rock hard cock. they stretch you for all your worth, bathing in the essence that you give them all while sharing sloppy kisses from over your shoulder.
its not like you haven’t slept with either one of them before. you’ve spent plenty of nights with your fingers stuffed deep into your needy sex, trying to pleasure yourself to the memory of your first time with bakugou and just as many nights bouncing away on kirishima’s length— filling the void with a melody of your mixed moans. but this is unlike anything you’ve ever experienced before. being double stuffed by two brawny and beefy men has you losing your very last shreds of sanity with each hard rut into your drenched, convulsing cunt. bright red and lacteal tips brush up against your g spot at the same time, doubling down on the dopamine and rapture tingling in your bloodstream.
poor eijirou sniffles, cries at how good your pussy grips him as he hits it from the back— his arousal and your juices tangling in his happy trail and slinging between your ass cheeks, glossing you up with a layer of sin. from behind, his palm snakes around your throat, giving it a light squeeze and restricting airflow into your lungs and to your brains. only serving to make you dizzier, easier to fuck.
on your other side, katsuki drops his grip to play with the cute bubbly flesh of your ass— spreading it apart so he can force himself deeper against your gushing, gummy insides. the further he spreads you, the more of your scent fills the air, accompanied by timbre groans and heavy pants. clear, thick liquid seeps out from between your folds and against katsuki’s tummy which lubes up your tangled limbs. “sweet fuckin’ girl, you feel so good. basically milkin’ us dry,” the blonde praises though his tone is slightly patronising, barely surfacing through his husky sighs. “you like that?” he adds, slowing the roll of his hips to grind up into you, making kirishima growl and you squeak.
“he’s talkin’ to you sweetheart, y’got an answer for him?” the redhead teases, shifting his hand to grab at your tear stained baby fat cheeks to turn your face to him. his chest bristles against your back in entertained laughter, pride dancing in his bright red eyes. “oh poor baby… what’s the matter, huh? you been fucked dumb? too full? god, look at her katsuki. a fuckin’ mess.” he continues to mock you over the sound of skin slapping harshly on skin, nipping at one of your wet cheeks. they cream warmly inside you, backs arching whenever their sensitive cocks brush against one another during your nasty double stuffing.
“don’t be fuckin’ mean eijirou,” bakugou coos to you softly, contrasting to his usual personality and with kirishima’s brashness as they take turns in ravaging you. “she just wants t’cum. don’t worry, angel, we’ll get’cha there.”
“p-please, just wanna be fucked, want all of you. harder katsuki, more eiji.” you beg, tripping over your words as they’re punctuated by your pleasure filled gasps. what you want, they give to you. balls clapping against your ass and your cunt.
the three of you make the trek up to cloud nine, just touching the gates of heaven. your expression is lewd, eyes rolled back in your skull, lips parted and your mouth hanging open— strings of saliva connecting the roof of your mouth to your tongue as it lolls over your bottom lip. bakugou and kirishima press bare down hard on your g-spot, never letting up on it while they angle their hips just right to make you see stars.
you’re seconds away from erupting, scratching down bakugou’s pecs while reaching behind you to tug on kirishima’s sweaty ruby strands of hair. their hips stutter but still attempt to delve further into your sopping, welcoming heat. “can feel how close you are, doll. clampin’ down on us. gonna make us lose it,” the blonde slurs.
“let go for us, c’mon baby. cum.” kirishima hiccups, working the three of you over the final hurdle— head first into an orgasm.
they pull out of you, as promised, just as you hit your high. your brain fuzzy and cleared of thought as you squirt for the boys, juices tainting their skin. they follow suit, two heavy loads of hot cum soil your thighs, your back and tummy— laying their claim on you for now.
the three of you flop against the ruined sheets, kirishima scoops up the mix of your arousals from the crudeness between you all and holds it to bakugou’s lips. the blonde blinks sleepily but complies, licking the redhead’s digits clean with a satisfied hum. and if you weren’t so fucked out, the view would have made you horny all over again.
“good boy, katsuki,” eijirou smiles, holding down his counterpart’s tongue.
bakugou bites down on his fingers cheekily, brows furrowing once the pink muscle is set free. “fuck you, eijirou.” looking down at you, a quivering cute little mess, and nudges your cheek. “you wanna get cleaned up, sweetheart? or do you wanna sleep.”
“sleep please,”
“‘m down for that. as hot as this was, you guys really wore me out.”
“yeah, yeah. settle down then red. let her sleep, alright?”
bakugou rolls his eyes, unimpressed, but smiling softly and throws an arm over you and the taller man in some form of a hug. completely blissed out, the three of you drift off into a deep slumber.
when you finally come to, one side of the bed is cold and the other warm from where a familiar figure has wrapped themselves around you. like a boa constrictor might do with its own prey.
“hey sleepin’ beauty,” eijirou greets you fondly, brushing a thumb over your pudgy cheek to gently coax you awake. “c’mon, katsuki said i had t’get you to go pee as soon as you woke up. don’t want you gettin’ sick.”
groaning, you rub the crusts of sleep from your eyes and stretch your limbs, sore from the countless rounds of sex earlier. “where is katsuki, anyways?” you mumble back, still drowsy, still clinging to the big muscular repair man in your bed.
“shower, he woke up first ‘n said he felt gross. try not to miss him too much, darlin’, you have me to keep you company.” he explains as if the two were never at each other’s throats, sinking back into the linens with you and squeezing you close to his chest. you think you could get used to this, the domesticity of it all if the boys can get along well enough, at least for your sake. maybe katsuki wouldn’t have to leave whiteridge, maybe you wouldn't have to leave and the three of you could be like this, together.
maybe you could help one another grieve in a healthy space. all together, as the found family izuku left you to be.
perhaps, this is the love that you’d been missing. deprived of.
you peer up at kirishima as he cradles you into the molten hot centre of his chest, sitting up with you in his arms slightly. even after everything you’ve been through you think that he’s beautiful, somewhat of a guardian angel to you and you can’t seem to fight the words trapped under your tongue. “eijirou i think i—“ love you. is what you want to say, but those butterflies carrying adoration start to go up in flames. they die under the wave of anxiety that crash over them. crash over you.
you change your words with your changing mood. “eijirou, what’s that?”
the redhead had been playing with your fingers above the duvet, allowing you to catch a glimpse of his inner wrist. “hm? what’s what, darlin’?”
there’s a mark embedded into his skin, familiar to you but you can’t quite put your finger on it. you wrack your brain, dash through your memories trying to place the little heart and match it up to what you know.
izuku comes to mind again, but not pleasantly. he had the same friendship mark, the same blood bond on his inner wrist. you remember it from the files in the autopsy report. they’re practically a perfect match. grabbing the repairman's arm, you inspect it closely, brushing your fingers over the symbol. “izuku. he had one of these…” you whisper.
“don’t be silly, i’ve had this for years and—“
“no.” you retort roughly, springing up from the bed and throwing on the nearest shirt. you ruffle through the papers on your desk until you find the report— frantically tearing out the photographic evidence and shoving it into eijirou’s face. “there’s no way you have the same intricately designed mark in the same place, faded like that. its not just some coincidence—“
panic starts to take over you, your brain running a mile a minute as you try to figure out the biggest question you have. why?
“baby. calm down. you’re being hysterical.” kirishima says in an attempt to bring you back you down, but he looks tense— scared. he knows what he's said is wrong, highly aware of the minefield he’s just stepped on.
“don’t you dare call me crazy, eijirou. you’ve done it before and i won’t let you do it again.” you growl, protecting yourself from any sensual lies he may try to feed you. “tell me the truth or so help me i’ll scream. when and how did you get that mark?”
bakugou resurfaces from the bathroom, sweatpants low on his hips while he confusedly towel dries his hair. “what’s goin’ on in here? why are you screaming?”
this time, you yank at the blonde’s arm to get a good look at his wrist too— right after you whirl around to face him. you’re sure you look crazed and you don’t have the time to dwell on the fact that he’s still wet, the water droplets on his skin sinking through your clothes. “you…you have it too,” its like a shock to your system. the fact that all three of them have the exact same mark printed against their skin.
you back away from katsuki, distance yourself from eijirou and tremble right in the middle of the bedroom. your head pounds as you try to figure out the possibilities and put the timeline together. bakugou looks between you and kirishima in confusion, and you watch as his face crumples upon making eye contact with your other lover.
“did…did he tell ya?” katsuki asks hesitantly, frowning deeper when you flinch as he steps towards you.
“t-tell me what?” you breathe out shakily, stomach dropping as katsuki confirms your suspicions. they’ve been hiding something from you. “no one tells me anything in this goddamn place! k-kirishima says i’m crazy, you can hardly look at me when i ask for the truth. i just want to know why you both have the same mark as izuku got on the day he died, why you were with him, why you won’t tell me shit!”
the room falls silent and all the air in it becomes replaced with a tension so thick you’re sure that not even the sharpest tool in the shed could cut through it. eijirou stands up from the bed this time, reaching out for you but you glare at him in warning to stay away. “let’s all just take a breather,” he proposes nervously and holds his hands out in deference. “you’ve had a long night doll, you gotta rest up—“
your face twists in disgust, hardly believing that kirishima would use the fact that the three of you had just had sex as an excuse to deny you the truth. “why do you keep denying me? why won’t you be honest with me?”
why. why. why.
katsuki makes a pained noise, mouth opening and closing as he debates his next words. he says your name welty and remorsefully. “because…we love you too much to hurt you.”
“katsuki.” eijirou says in warning, though he doesn’t rebuke the confession. they love you, they love you enough to lie to you. “don’t.”
“why not?” you fight back, even though you feel like you’re losing the battle already. “i know something went on between the two of you, i know now that my mother wasn’t crazy trying to find out either.” emotions rush through you all at once— guilt, anger, sadness. everything you thought you’d pushed away since leaving whiteridge coming right back to the forefront of your mind— brought forth by the last people you thought would ever hurt you. “if either of you cared about me like you say you do. love me like bakugou says—“
stepping forward and almost crossing your boundary, the redhead cuts you off, his throat dry and eyes wild. “we do!” he exclaims, trying his best to be convincing. “we do love you. i always have, you know that.” he says your name once and for some reason it feels like a punch to the gut, a betrayal to even utter the syllables after lying to you. “y’gotta believe me when i say it…”
“then let me put them to rest, kirishima! stop dodging my questions and being vague. quit gaslighting me into thinking there’s nothing fucked up about what’s going on here!” you argue, not even bothering to stop the flow of tears that fall freely from your glossy eyes. “i just want my mom and izuku to have their peace…and you’re not letting me do that.”
that seems to break something in katsuki. you can almost hear his heart break when he looks at you, like he’s been dying to say it all from the start. if just push a little more, he might crack, if you try a little harder, he might open up to you like you need him too. so you plead with him, try to appeal to the softer side you know exists within katsuki bakugou— hold that metaphorical hand out to him like he’d done for you at your brother’s grave some weeks ago.
“please,” you choke back a sob, not caring if you look insane or if you’re a snotty and teary eyed mess. “i deserve to know. i need to know, and if you have any sense of love for me, you’ll tell me what happened to izuku that day.”
“it was an accident,” he starts slowly, voice raw. bakugou looks like he’s hurting, taken a bullet to the chest as he bleeds his truth out for you. “we…we didn’t mean for it to happen.”
“katsuki, shut up!”
“kirishima let him talk—“
“—god damn it, eijirou!” spinning on his heel, katsuki directs his frustrations at the latter��� seething through his heartache. “quit playin’ around! she deserves to know…t’know what we did.”
kirishima’s lips form a thin line, expression solemn as he visibly gives up— stops building up his happy go lucky wall that keeps you on the outside of it all. it could have been his way of protecting you, like he had said but no matter what side of the card kirishima showed you, you knew in this moment, knew that somewhere in the back of your mind you couldn’t trust him. not anymore. not even if your heart wanted to.
“it really was an accident,” he croaks after some time, his words punctuated by bakugou’s heavy breathing. “we were with deku that day too, just the three of us. like we always were. y’couldn't separate us back then…even if you tried.” kirishima is wistful as he speaks, almost as if that fateful day was a good one for him. he looks as though he can feel the sunshine on his cheeks and the fresh air in his lungs, hear izuku’s laughter accompanied by the sway of the canopy up above their youthful heads. “katsuki had given us the marking… they were stick ‘n poke tattoos, he stole the kit from the convenience store, you remember that kats?”
bakugou nods his head, but doesn’t dare look at you— aware of the fact that if he does, he’ll shatter like glass under the weight of his own guilt. “i r’member. you cried like a bitch when i got yours. deku…” he laughs, but it’s heartless and cold before he corrects himself. “deku took his like a champ. he was brave like that, the bravest out of all of us.”
hearing them talk about your brother so softly makes you feel both sick and, in a weird way, happy at the same time. just knowing that even in his final hours he acted the same way as he always did— just like your izuku. “how did you guys end up by the lake?” you prompt. “what about his ankle? the picture my mom had of you guys?”
the redhead rolls his shoulders, tense as he recalls the story to you. “we weren’t s’pposed to be that at the lake.”
“w-what?”
“we were only going for a hike, to izuku’s favourite spot— i swear we were just kids— just being fuckin’ stupid,” bakugou seems more panicked now, as if the memories were too anxiety inducing for even him to bare. “o-on the way up he tripped, i’d been messin’ with him ‘n made deku trip on a fuckin’ rock of all things.”
a rock? that would have explained how your brother had broken his ankle— the thought of his bone crunching makes your skin crawl, imagining his beautiful freckled face twisting in agony only pisses you off. you’re across the room before you can register, gripping him by the shoulders and shaking him.
“what for? why did you touch him?”
he’s never seen you so vicious, like a rabid dog pushing the bulking blonde back against the wall. and he lets you, barely putting up a fight. “i-i…” he stutters.
“it’s because he liked you and deku didn’t approve.” it’s kirishima who confesses this to you and you stop your attack on bakugou to listen attentively— holding back despite your trembles. you hadn’t known the blonde back then, but you remember spots of him in your life. how he’d be kind to you when izuku wasn’t around, how he looked out for you behind the scenes. it hadn’t occurred to you that he might have liked you the way eijirou did, you’d hardly known each other after all. his lack of deku’s approval could been foresight, knowing what all comes next. “bakugou wanted to turn back after it happened, but midoriya insisted on getting to the clearin’ so we carried him up…he wanted to camp out ‘n see the stars that night.”
“we found the lake by accident tryna find somewhere t’rest before we got there. we stopped and…” kirishima trails off, swallowing thickly and an awful feeling swirls around in your lower tummy. like that feeling you get just before you’re jump-scared while watching a horror movie. you’re stomach drops, your pupils dilate— air becomes scarce to you.
this is the plot twist, the truth your mother died without knowing.
“it was an accident,” eijirou repeats the same mantra from earlier, sounding as if he's about to burst into tears.
“so you’ve said,” you say, voice devoid of any emotion as you wait for the big reveal, for the ball to drop. “what happened, eijirou?”
“he pushed him.”
ice runs through your veins— freezing your beating heart in its place as your gaze trails back up to katsuki’s face. he catches you as you stumble and the world starts to spin as if you’ve been thrown on an unstable rollercoaster. “pushed him…right over the edge. ‘cause deku said he weren’t brave enough for you.” bakugou mumbles, plainly— though the rubies in his red eyes are shattered with grief.
it was stupid. the dumbest thing you’d ever heard— your older brother, the only person who’d ever truly loved you shoved over the edge of a fucking river bank over you. you who didn’t know the two men before you had loved you too. you were the reason eijirou kirishima had let him drown. you were the reason eijirou kirishima had pushed him to his death.
“t-that doesn’t…that doesn’t make sense!” you try, clutching at your chest because you feel like you can’t breathe no matter how hard you try. something as simple as taking in oxygen and letting out carbon dioxide becomes a chore, eyes darting everywhere around the room only to settle on the man who took your world away from you. “izuku can swim. he could swim!”
kirishima hiccups, doesn’t dare to move or touch you— knowing that you’ll lash out or tear him apart. “i didn’t mean it, i-i swear, if i could take it back i would have—!”
“why didn’t you go in after him? why didn’t you save him?” you scream this time, realising the gravity of the situation. realising that izuku, like you now, in his last moments couldn’t breathe. how he’d slipped under the surface of water that’s meant to give life and instead had it taken away from him. he’d been cold, he’d been in pain— suffocating and neither of these men had gone in after him. how could they have possibly claimed to love you after all of this. “you…you murderer!”
even though your knees are weak and wobble, you follow your fit of rage and toss yourself in the redhead’s direction with the intent to kill— probably no better than him. bakugou circles his strong arms around your waist even though you kick and scream and cry, scratching at him until you draw blood.
“we thought he’d come back up!” the blonde whimpers.
breaking free, you look at bakugou incredulously— like a wild animal in fear and you might as well be. you have no idea what these men are capable of almost a decade and a half later. you sniff, your eyes lined with red and liquid silver tears. “why didn’t you get help?” comes your choked out question.
“we were kids… we thought if we just went home…it’d all be over. that it’d never happened. what else could we have done?” eijirou warbles wetly. you don’t know how he can sit there after all this time and have the audacity cry. how either of them can act like they hid this from you out of love. love isn’t playing mind games or dragging you through rounds of mental gymnastics. love isn’t pushing the person you care for to the brink of insanity.
they don’t love you.
only izuku was capable of that, it seems.
“you could have helped him.” you utter quietly— as cold as the thick shards of ice once again guarding your heart. your next movements are quick, have you running on adrenaline and that same desire to escape this town from years ago. you grab what you can, the important stuff— clothes, your laptop and any notes, your mother’s pictures and something to remember izuku by before making a dash for your car. your second great escape.
the men that you thought you could call your lovers are quick to follow you— calling out your name hopelessly through the loveless walls of your childhood home. every bad memory you thought you’d replaced here turns sour, every second you’d spent between them with katsuki and eijirou garners a visceral reaction from you. you can’t stand to hear their voices anymore, to think about how close you had allowed yourself to be with them. you’d been vulnerable, let them see the deepest parts of you that you’d kept safeguarded for years only to have it shown to the wrong people.
to have everything thrown back into your face.
defeated tears burn at your tired eyes as you reach your car— fighting with its handle to get inside. you’d never given so much of yourself to other people before, only to find out they were the ones who’d hurt izuku. it breaks you, in the worst of ways— as if someone had taken the delicate vase of your heart and thrown it at a wall. you’re cut by the shards, worn down beyond repair. there’s no coming back from this, to this horrible place.
“baby…baby please don’t go.” katsuki tells to you as he rushes down from the porch to meet you with eijirou in tow. despair dulls his once beautiful vermillion eyes, but just looking into them hurts you. you can’t trust what they say anymore. “we…we never fuckin’ meant for any of this to happen. to hurt’cha like this. please don’t go. let us make this right. give us a chance. just one—“
“just don’t go to the police.” kirishima cuts bakugou off once they’re fully by your sides, desperation clinging to his voice and ringing out into the night air. “it’ll ruin our lives.”
your actions pause, and you no longer find yourself slipping into your car but instead eerily turning around to face the duo. before you can realise what you’re doing— your hand flies back and lands harshly against the redhead’s cheek, stunning you all into silence. “are you fucking kidding me, kirishima? your lives?” there’s so many years of rage echoing in your voice, a wet tiredness in your face that no one else in the world could possibly relate to right now. his words sting, they fill you with a poison that only blackens your weak heart and you don’t bother to stop the viciousness that spills from your lips next.
“that’s all you can think about? you have no fucking idea what its like to have your life ruined, to live day by day absolutely-fucking-miserable because the only thing…the only person that you lived for, is gone. you don’t know shit about living life or having it ruined.” neither of them think to speak as you rant away, releasing everything you’d ever held back since leaving whiteridge. kirishima clutches his swelling cheek, an expression of regret plastered across his features and bakugou can’t even bare to look at you— gaze focused purely on the dirt beneath his shoes.
“my brother is dead because of you. he is gone. he’s never ever coming back and it’s all your fault. i hate you. i hate you more than i’ve ever hated anyone in my entire life. both of you.” you spit, slurring over your words, crying the hardest you ever have in all your years of living. you’re still met with nothing, you’re not sure if you even want to hear what they have to say but you keep going, nonetheless.
“that’s what it feels like to have your life ruined, when there’s no more love left in you. you will never know what that's like…what it’s like to be me. my life, all my hopes and dreams, they were ruined the day you took my brother from me. the day you murdered him.”
taking a deep breath, you wipe your face on the hem of the shirt you’re wearing and throw yourself into your vehicle, duchess, reviving her up in frustration. kirishima sets his hand on the glass of your window and feebly mumbles your name, bakugou doesn’t budge. you’ve said your piece and now there’s nothing more to it.
“fuck you. both of you.” you growl as best as you can before pulling out of the driveway and making sure you leave for good.
you contemplate stopping at the police station, but without their confessions recorded you have as little evidence as your mother did when she fought for the lost life of her son— and you barely have it in you to spend a second longer in this town. god forbid they start calling you crazy too.
so you drive, you drive through your choked tears and heaving sobs. you drive until you can’t see the sign to whiteridge anymore. you drive until your wrists hurt from holding the steering wheel too tight— and until you feel safe again.
safe like the day you left for the first time, all those years ago.
your book releases exactly one year and one day from the day you’d left whiteridge for good.
the loneliness of your luxury apartment deep in the bustling life of the big city had welcomed you back with working heating and open arms— giving you the space to recover from your emotional and mental wounds left on you by two men you thought you could trust. the ones you thought that you could love.
from there, it takes you six months, a shit tonne of black coffee and low-contact with the outside world to fully complete your autobiography. you tell every story you can think of, every lust, every love, every loss and every lie— permanently inking them as your life’s work for the whole world and it’s mother to see. you want anyone who will listen to know your story and know that there’s nothing more the universe could throw at you to mess with you.
mina receives your full and completed manuscript via email right before she’s due to board a plane with her fiancé hanta sero ( the graphic designer for the cover of all your books, as it turns out ) and both of them drop everything to swing by your place to check that you’re alive and well. you’re far from it, actually. they can most certainly tell by your sunken red lined eyes and your kind-of gross pyjamas that you wear and the litter scattered across your living space— but at that time, neither of them question it.
sero orders take-out for dinner ( or whatever meal of the day it’s supposed to be ) and ashido cleans up the apartment, before cleaning you up, and together the three of you read through the final transcript.
of course, she loves it, she holds you when you cry and sero holds her when she cries. they don’t dare to ask you what happened out there, in the small town of whiteridge, its written clear as day in your heartfelt words… but for the first time in your life you feel that people really know you, and genuinely care.
mina gets you the best therapist money can buy after that night.
your book launch comes sooner than expected, and it does better than you expected as well. fans from all over the world sympathise with your story, they mourn the loss of your family right alongside you, they curse the two men you’ve named as ‘red’ and ‘blondie’ and most importantly, they hate the town that hurt you. these days, jirou tells you that almost every establishment in whiteridge has negative reviews on yelp, except for the hotel she runs with momo and denki’s bar right across the street— in fact, both businesses have been skyrocketing since your autobiography hit the shelves.
kirishima calls around that time too. when you answer, the line is full of static crackling over the loud silence and neither of you speak. “finished repairs on your mom’s house today,” he says, floundering for words and time. “think it’ll be up f’sale later this week.”
“thanks, kirishima.”
his breath had hitched at the use of his last name, no sweet pet name, no tone of affection or butterflies in your stomach. “i read your book too.”
“hasn’t everyone?”
“i should have told the truth, i shouldn’t have lied to you,” he goes on, clinging onto one last thread of hope. “then maybe—“
“then what?” you ask slowly, clutching your phone a little tighter.
“then maybe we could have been something, like we’d always wanted.”
there’s more silence, and then you laugh— brightly, genuinely, rendering the repairman confused on the other end of the phone. “i doin’t think you ever wanted me that badly, eijirou. otherwise, you would have come after me.” you tell him once you catch your breath. “besides, we wouldn’t have worked out anyway.”
“why not?”
“because, even if you’d told me the truth. lying to spare my heart would’ve always been an option to you. you’d never be honest to hurt me and comfort me after— you’re too nice for that. you’d rather not see me hurting at all.” when you explain, he has no answer and your phone beeps signifying another call on another line. “kirishima?”
“maybe… maybe you’re right.”
“i think i am.”
“yeah,” he whispers in harmony with the static. “i guess this is goodbye then.”
“it is,” you whisper back as the beeping gets louder. “goodbye kirishima.”
“goodbye, lil’ midoriya.”
he never apologises after that, and the only time you hear from him is via text regarding the house. bakugou never makes contact with you, and you can’t help but wonder if he even bothered to read your book— that’s if he even knew about it.
according to management, and mina, a book tour was the next and final thing on your agenda before you were allowed a well earned break— the promise of freedom and the time to relax or write something a little less soul-damaging, getting a little closer with each tour stop you make.
“so, when you found out that these two men you’d been falling for had lied to you and hid the truth about your brother, how did you feel? i-i know you talk about it in the book…but i’d gone through something similar a-and i wanted to hear it from you.”
you end up back in the beautiful city you call home for the last tour-stop. the girl who had been asking you the question stands in the very front row, she seems nervous, like she’d been silenced her whole life— and the way she clutches onto your book gives you the impression that she’d found her voice through you. you see your old self in her too.
“well…” you start, carefully folding your hands into the centre of your lap. in the back of the auditorium mina had rented out for the event, the door swings open, and you swallow thickly as it reveals a pair of familiar and daunting red eyes. “well, to be honest… i felt the greatest loss i’d ever felt in my life.” you muse out loud, refocusing your attention to the timid girl in front of you. “you’d think, after everything i’d seen and been through, that i wouldn’t be able to feel anything aside from numbness at that point. i’d spent years of my life trying to fill the hole izuku left…that my mother left too. and to be betrayed like that? well you might as well have cut open my chest and ripped my heart out.”
the audience applauds your monologue, and the girl thanks you sweetly but most of it falls on deaf ears before your next question— those same red eyes locking with yours once again, saying only one thing.
‘i’m sorry.’
after your talk, there’s a two hour book-signing and you don’t expect your unexpected guest to be leaning against the wall, waiting for you outside, once everyone has gone.
“you didn’t want your copy signed?” you ask with a tiny hint of amusement, leaning against the opposite wall to your visitor. “i think i still have some ink in my pen if you do.”
adjusting his cap on his head and holding out his copy to you, bakugou scoffs but mirrors your playfulness with his signature toothy smirk. “don’t do too well with crowded spaces, so i figured i’d wait until after,” your fingers brush only just as you take the book from him and scribble your name across the first page with your dedication to both izuku and your mom on it. “was an amazin’ read, by the way, i loved the endin’— how y’solved yer own mystery ‘n shit. the girls at work loved it.”
looking up from the printed version of the story of your life, you give bakugou a small smile. “mystery and misery do seem to go together.”
“ya still miserable?”
“sometimes,” you admit to the blonde a little too quickly for your liking. “but i have more good days than bad now. what about you? is whiteridge still as shitty as ever?”
“nah,” katsuki hums proudly and matches your smile. it’s nice to see him happy, after to so long— but maybe a part of you is a little glad to see him when you should be hating him. “moved outta that shithole ‘bout six months ago. i live here in the city now, ‘n work in a small family owned restaurant downtown. they serve the best fuckin’ pork katsu you’ll ever have...”
you wrap your arms around yourself, a shiver running through you despite how warm the building is. your mom used to tell you that those random cold shivers were the spirits making their presence known to you— so you think that izuku might be watching right now. “i’ll have to try it someday,” comes your quiet voice.
“you’ hafta lemme take you sometime soon—“
“i don’t mean to be crass, bakugou, but...what are you even doing here?” then the conversation goes quiet.
you’ve come to hate the sound of silence these last few months— no one who knows you, no one who loves you knows what to say to you anymore.
your silences are no longer filled with the click and clack of a keyboard because you no longer have anything to write about, they’re no longer broken up by text chimes or ringtones because you’ve cut off kirishima and he used to call you almost everyday, they’re no longer filled with the laughter you would share from bantering off of bakugou. there’s no one to occupy your silence except for the frenzy of your own mind, because izuku is dead, your mom is dead and it’s just you now.
but then, bakugou speaks up— rasps through the heavy hushness for you, reaching out for you like he always does. “i-i don’t fuckin’ know,” he begins aimlessly. “i wasn’t even s’pposed t’be here, ‘m meant to be on dinner service tonight but i got an ad fer ya book signin’ on the way over ‘n just…called in sick,'' the world comes to a standstill as he explains himself to you, the blonde is right in front of you but feels a million miles away all at the same time. katsuki looks to the ceiling, as if you’ll be scorched by his gaze. “i had this whole plan in my head, of what i was gonna say t’you when i got the chance, but now that ‘m here…well ‘m.. fuckin’ blankin’!”
“i don’t… i don’t need a long-winded monologue from you, katsuki, i just need to hear you say it and know that you mean it.” your voice trembles with the threat of crying, tears already forming in your waterline.
you don’t need much, is what you tell yourself, as bakugou’s mouth opens and closes— formulating the words, finding the right order to put them in. you just need one more ounce of truth. you’ve been given the bare minimum almost all of your life, but this is the highest standard you’ll ever hold someone to. taking accountability for hurting you.
katsuki takes a step towards you, and another more confident one when you don’t move. “‘m sorry,” strong arms wrap around your waist, pulling you into his safety net of an embrace, one of his hands cupping the back of your head. “‘m sorry for all the fuckin’ pain i put you through, never wanna see you that hurt ever again.” you melt into him, tears falling freely as bakugou fights back his own. “i stayed away f’too long, tryna figure out if i was worth forgivin’, if i deserved a second chance but i know now… it was never about me. you jus’ needed me to apologise. so ‘m sorry, to you, your mom and to izuku.”
katsuki bakugou says it all, everything you’ve been needing to hear from every adult in your life since you lost your brother— so clutching his shirt tight between your fingers, you pull him into you, letting your eyes bore deep into his own. in the life you’ve lived, you’ve had to learn how to read people, see through their eyes to know what they truly mean and think when they look at you.
but staring into katsuki’s right now, all you can see is the honesty in them— intertwined with the dark brownish flecks that contrast with their rich vermillion colour. he truly means it.
he’s truly sorry.
and with that, you lean up and press a feather light peck to his lips, feeling him tremble in your hold before hesitantly melting into you— saying the words he needs you to say.
“i forgive you, katsuki, we both do.”
END.
#bakugou x reader#bakugou smut#kirishima smut#kirishima x reader#bnha smut#bakugou x you#kirishima x you#bakugou katsuki smut#bakugou fanfic#bakugo smut#bakugou katsuki x reader#eijirou kirishima smut#mha smut#bakugou imagine#bakugou angst#kirishima imagine#bnha x reader#mha x reader#✧ ₊˚੭ — writing#tteokdoroki#tw: character death#tw: dark themes
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PURELY PLATONIC(?)
CHARLES LECLERC
summary : are yn and charles dating? are they just friends? who cares? well, twitter does. category : smau. note : disregard all times and dates, they don't matter. all spelling mistakes are intentional. this wasn't supposed to be my 1st fic posted but it is what it is.
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charles_leclerc finally got to see ma crevette
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youruser thought we'd agreed that you'd never call that in public ever again
charles_leclerc no, you said that, i was silent
user2 were you silent or were you silenced😭
youruser you're such a pain in my arse
charles_leclerc you love me really
youruser unfortunately
username67 SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP SOBBING
user08 they're so friends to lovers coded
username12 SHE DIDN'T DISAGREE!!!
pierregasly didn't you see her 2 months ago? when you flew out to see her
charles_leclerc that was forever ago
pierregasly *cough*whipped*cough*
this comment was deleted by creator
user8 I SAW THAT, YOU CANT HIDE FROM ME
user92 HE FLEW OUT TO SEE HER😭😭
user5 did anyone see pierres deleted comment or was it just me?
user16 no, I saw it too
user7 me too!
landonorris relax bro, no one's taking her away from you
charles_leclerc I'd like to see someone try lol
user99 adding lol to the end of your sentence didn't make it less threatening 💀
user420 *joker voice* why so serious??
user111 LANDO, WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THIS??? ANSWER ME PLS, I AM IN YOUR WALLS
lunavrse pls pretend the manips look good👍 also the last one is just a random picture bc I couldn't edit it the way I wanted
user25 what the fuck are you on about?
user72 what is bro yapping about?❗💀
user7 WHO LET BLUD COOK⁉️❓❗❗
user222 monaco's finest😋
user00 them in the 1st pic have my heart
user000 UGH,, HIS DIMPLES!!!!
mutualfriend she's serving and then there's you
user777 two pretty best friends🤭
user66 two besties😁
user33 yeah... besties...
user92 REUNITED AND IT FEELS SO GOOD...
user29 REUNITED CAUSE WE UNDERSTOOD
user929 i love this song
user127 I KNOW Y'ALL SEE THE "MY" INFRONT OF THE PETNAME
user24 WE LOVE TO SEE IT
user9 that's honestly so fucking cute I'm crying
user88 charles repping ferrari where ever he goes!!!
user237 suprised it's only the one tbh
user228 as he should!!!
user1616 THE WAY HES LOOKING AT HER😭😭😭
user090 face cards never declining ❗
user10 charlito te amo❤️ !!!
user47 never knew i needed this until now
user74 so real bro
user27 please back away from my wife, it's hard enough seeing her with another man and you have the audacity to rub it in my face😭
user123 two best friends in a room... they might kiss
user262 can we talk about how close they are??? like they just seem so touchy!!!
user751 no fr!!! you can't tell me they're not in love with one another
user12 see if he was touching me like this, you'd never see me again because I'd be deceased
user61 so real of you tbh
user767 pls they're so...
user50 im not allowed to see these, im unwell
user44 you look so cute !
TWITTER
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landonorris has posted to their instagram story.
you replied to their story.
YOU DUMB BITCH DELETE THIS ⤷landonorris SORRY, IT WAS MEANT FOR MY CLOSE FRIENDS
you replied to their story.
DELETE THIS YOU CLOWN ⤷landonorris DONT YELL AT ME! I'LL DO IT NOW
you replied to their story.
is that charles and yn
lunavrse replied to their story.
this is the worst manip in this post<3 (editing note: it's actually not, it gets worse)
you replied to their story.
LANDO IS THAT CHARLES AND YN
you replied to their story.
Lando mate, they're gonna kill you
you replied to their story.
I KNEW IT, MY FAMILY SAID I WAS CRAZY AND THEY CAN KISS MY ASS
you replied to their story.
Carlos owes me €100, I knew it'd be you. can't wait to attend your funeral
this story has been deleted
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liked by charles_leclerc, pierregasly, landonorris and 712 273 others
youruser suprise but not really🎉
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landonorris does this mean I get to live?
youruser you're funny.
landonorris what do you mean?!? please don't kill me
youruser see you soon x
charles_leclerc we look so good❤️
youruser the best baby❤️
user19 BABY SHHSHSHE
user91 IM SCREAMING, CANT BELIEVE I GET TO SEE THIS
pierregasly glad i don't have to suffer alone and the rest of the world gets to see how gross you guys are
charles_leclerc weren't you the one who sent me a voice note crying about how happy you were when i told you i finally asked her out ?
youruser aww, pierre, you cried???
pierregasly he's lying
charles_leclerc do you want me to send her the voice note?
user65 it's quiet, ain't no back talk🤭
user80 charles said, i've got receipts bitch💀💀
user71 THEY LOOK GOOD TOGETHER!!!
user22 idk who i want more
user505 me and who?
user005 me n u?
user505 lol no
user101 IMS O USED TO GIVING ANDN OW I GET TO RECEIVE 🥹
user41 PARENTS
user14 IKTR😌
user06 IM SO GLAD WE GOT (OFFICIAL) CONFIRMATION
user003 god, me when?
user79 i want both of 'em😋
user25 I need to know when this happened 😭
user87 same😭
#lunavrse writes(?)⋆#charles leclerc x reader#f1 smau#f1 instagram au#charles leclerc instagram au#charles leclerc imagine#f1 x reader#f1 social media au#f1 imagine#cl16 x reader#f1 fic
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i think i need a better system than what i have now which is if a scene pops into my head ill type it out quickly and then i just have it there for months like ??? ok but what is the plot of this???
god i want to write so badly but my mind feels sooooo empty i’m at the point where i would beg for prompts just to see if i can force something. Like i guess my issue is that so many of my WIPs and ideas center around eddie, and specifically him coming out and kgnfngmfngnf i just feel like i need to see how the season ends to know how much of a fool i am kgnfngmfn 😅😅and nothing else is sparking in my head rnnnn but i WANT to write
#the only thing i know the plot of is a short smut fic which im just feeling uninspired about rn and the cheating aftermath fic which feels#too daunting but im slowly chipping away at it…#idk i just!!! want something to click the way catfish fic did in my head#coming back to edit my own tags to call myself out for rewriting history#girl you were screaming crying throwing up trying to write catfish fic it didn’t click!!!!!#the tommy fic is the only one that came with no hassle and that’s bc i wrote it during a manic breakdown
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Kill me slowly, Baby you know I don’t fucking mind
warnings: vent fic about illness, mildly graphic depictions/imagery of physical and mental illness
tim drake centric
title: life waster by corpse (don’t look at me ok im embarrassed)
word count: 912
beta read and edited by the lovely @vespertilionis
Do not cry. Do not cry.
That’s all Tim can tell himself as he stiffly walks back to his car. He knows how this is going to go, he’s not too sure why he got his hopes up. He feels like an idiot.
Finally, in the safety of his car, he actually looks down at the referrals he has been given. One for a CT scan and the other for an overabundance of blood tests. He didn’t ask for either. All he wanted was a referral to see an ENT, but the doctor hadn’t even looked at him before she started talking over him and suggesting other ideas.
There’s a few things we can do before you see an ENT. It’s been a year since he started feeling like this. All he wanted was to see a specialist, someone who would know what was wrong.
It’s probably not what you think it is. Probably?
You’re crazy, nothing is wrong with you.
Nothing is wrong.
Nothingiswrongnothingiswrongnothingiswrong
He throws the referrals across the car before slamming his fist into the steering wheel and letting out the loudest scream he could.
It peters off into a sob when he realises he can’t hear anything. Well, anything but a high ringing. He sits there hyperventilating in his own version of silence.
He calls the CT place while driving, desperately trying to sound like he hasn’t been crying. He almost breaks down when the receptionist mentions he had the same test done around this time last year.
As he pulls into the driveway of the manor, he takes a moment to calm down. Firstly, because he doesn’t want to talk about it, and secondly, because he feels guilty for being upset. At least the doctor was running tests. Sure, she didn’t really listen to him and suggested tests for allergies and anemia, which he is sure he didn’t have, but she still decided to do tests. Other people have been sick for years and don’t have doctors listen to them, so he should be grateful.
Maybe she doesn’t think he’s crazy.
He tries not to think about the fact that if the CT scan comes back and shows his sinuses blocked, the doctor might put him on his fourth round of antibiotics. Even after the other three rounds have completely tanked his immune system. Or that if the blood tests show he is anemic, she might focus on that instead of the actual problem. Like the horrible constant congestion that makes him feel like his brain is being compressed into a liquid that’s going to explode out of his ears and nose. Or that if he does have the disease he thinks he does, he might lose his hearing. He really doesn’t want to think about that part.
When he enters the manor, he heads straight for the cave. He’s hoping for the perfectly healthy distraction of vigilantism. His hopes are immediately crushed when Bruce turns to him and asks him how the appointment went.
“Oh, uh, it went ok. We’re redoing some of the tests we did last year,” he says awkwardly, wishing for once Bruce would notice he didn’t want to talk about it. Once again, his wishes go unheard as the older man just looks concerned.
“You don’t seem too happy about that.”
No shit, man, no clue how you got the title of world’s greatest detective.
He tries to push away the resurfacing anger by laughing, but it comes out wrong.
“Yeah well, last time the results didn’t really get us anywhere. So, I was kinda hoping she would try something else.” Another laugh. Bruce nods and turns away. Either he finally got the hint or doesn’t know where to go with Tim’s response.
Relieved that the conversation is finally over, he starts heading to the computer when he hears Jason scoff.
“Ya know what I think you need? Some concrete to harden you up.”
Harden you up. Fucking whiny baby.
Harden you up. Ungrateful child.
Harden you up. Nothings wrong with you Tim, you’re out of your mind.
Tim stops in his tracks and turns his head slowly to face the older boy.
“What?” he says coldly, causing Jason to raise his hands in surrender.
“Hey! I was just joking with you.” he laughs, and Tim’s eye twitches.
“No, explain it to me, so I can understand how it was supposed to be funny.” He can feel the anger rising again. Jason lowers his arms, looking guilty for his ‘joke’, but Tim couldn’t care less.
“I just meant that you complain a lot. It’s kinda miserable.” He answers, sounding defeated, but again Tim couldn’t care less.
“Why do you think that is Jason? Do you think I’m complaining because it’s fun?” “No—“ “No! I’m not! I am fucking miserable! I’m exhausted and dizzy and I feel like my brain is rotting in my skull! And I’m sick of people not listening to me and thinking I’m fucking CRAZY!”
His throat hurts from screaming. He’s hyperventilating again, but he can’t hear it over the sound of the ringing again. It hurts. He shakes his head to try and clear it, but it just makes the world spin around him. A hand reaches out to steady him but he pushes it away.
“Don’t fucking touch me.” God, his voice is always so much louder when his ears are blocked.
He stumbles up the stairs, knowing he’s probably stomping, but he can’t hear that either.
#ew i hate tumblr formatting#i’ll link the ao3 post as well but in a bit#sorry tim love you bud#tim drake#jason todd#he’s also here#batfam#chronic mystery illness#i’m fine guys 😀#fanfic#batfamily fanfic#tim drake fanfic#batman#bat family
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at the end we didn't re read, but rather read Archive of Our Own. and you know what. I was fucking right. if it's yours, is good. that a goddamn law by now.
1. I'm soooo Charles trying to explain Max about ao3. sadly, truthfully, I do not have a hot best friend to yap to and force to read the stuff I read who has a spot for me. WHERE IS MY OWN MAX. also yes Charles. the notes. the tags. so important. you don't wanna learn it the bad way.
2. I got a flashback reading when Max called out Charles and writers. literally my roomie. and now, look at him. he's gone so far, my boy is all grown up 🥹
3. I can absolutely see the grid turning this into a competition. egocentric bunch of competitive assholes (affectionate) also the press con? excuse you?
4. omg maddie the phone scene was FIREEEEE. dare I say, you professed your own fic because as much as I loved the end, the call was a little hotter than the actual thing.
5. so we've all agreeded that Max is oblivious as hell? yes? alright. like. the names? the titles of the fics? ARE YOU FOR REAL?!?! Charles was almost screaming at the top of his lungs and Max was like uh yeah. how was it? I want him to be happy and to be there to see it for the rest of my life? my bed is cold and empty without you? I miss him so much my chest aches? the cuddling as well?!?! (I screamed) yeah buddy. so so friend coded. suuuure.
+1. I decided to open a bottle of red wine yesterday and I laughed so much reading this. like so so much. met me tell you, that was a bad combination. my couch now has two stains of some fancy italian red wine. one is my fault. the other one is from my gay roommate hearing about spit as lube for the first time. you had to see his face.
+2. Max does indeed has, a breeding kink. I know. I was one of the unused condoms from the strip Charles had.
+3. writer+blogger+lestappie+chussyandbottomcharlestruther Charles holds a special place in my heart. also, the reader that called him out on characterization and wheel. knowledge LMAO. and finally, how the fuck did he found out about ao3. and how do we not get there.
can't wait for the next wygig chapter, whenever it comes! also, loved this completely short and not almost completed fic-like one shot. ❤️
the levels of meta of Max being quintessential written by a woman character while at the same time in fic critiquing fake Max being written by women .............
so we all went through the 'is this morally ethical' to enjoying omega verse pipeline then huh ...
literallllyyyyyyy they all got so into it. the sniff of a grid wide competition and they al run off with it
when I had the idea for the phone sex I was like "my mind. wow." so I totally agreeee
max was so deep in denial that he came out the other side and was pining hopelessly the entire time
+1. not the red wine stains!!!! also when my gay best friend found out I was writing gay sex he was like "ok you do you but if you use spit as lube I will kill you" so. that pipeline is also very real.
+2. oh my god. screaming crying throwing up. that's so funny. (and yes you're right. he totally does)
+3. he for sure already knew about ao3 and fic but had never read it and then he was casually watching some lestappen edits on TikTok to pine over Max, saw someone in the comments talking about a fic they'd read on 'ao3' and then was like 'wow I could take my pining to the next level'. and then boom. suddenly he's realised lestappen are losing to maxiel and then he's barging into Max's apartment 30 minutes later.
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(idk if tumblr ate my ask but i resent it and edited it a bit since i wanted to get back to you)
"everyone is sideyeing aya" as they should... she just seems entitled, conceited and a bad friend. like we were screaming crying and throwing up bc we didn't get a chance to date a guy we saw first and she rubbing it in unintentionally (i still feel like she knew or had a hunch that we liked him and still went through with it) it was blatantly obvious we were uncomfortable and then we have to deal with her bad attitude and be her therapist too... girl gtf from me lol (aya not you) and suguru not liking her has my eyebrows raised
i honestly see a lot of draken angst including emma but not a lot of them are well written and fleshed out enough to relate to them (or you end up being friends and it's not easy to feel immersed in the fic since sometimes you can’t see yourself being friends with the character) so i'm excited since i like your writing style (i haven't fully watched tr but i fell in love with him when i first saw him and our zodiac signs are compatible so it made me so excited until i found out about emma and my feelings were hurt Imfaoooihatebeingsensitiveooooo) i always fall for characters with canon love interests and i always end up with my feelings hurt
you can expect to hear from me when it drops bc i'm a sucker for seeing fictional men suffer when its deserved (which it could be based on the synopsis, which makes me want to giggle and scream into my hand) can't wait for him to scream cry and throw up a be why would he love someone more than me and know other women (only joking)
but yes!! cannot wait and lowkey go to your page for updates bc i'm invested in the gojo fic and draken fic
tumblr is hating
aya is definitely a bad friend but you didn't hear that from me 🫢
screaming crying and throwing up is so accurate but guess who satoru is with now 😝
thank you for liking my writing, i hope i can live up to your expectations with my draken fic
and my feelings were hurt when i found out abt emma too 😭 i was LIKE LEAVE MY MANNN
i have sooo much to finish in both fics and i don't want to put them out until i'm satisfied but i'm just not getting the time to work on them 😣
i'll try to post them asap
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I am sorry to disturb you but sometimes I stay up at night, lying awake in my bed at 3am, staring up at the ceiling as I think about how they did ladynoir dirty and I wanted to talk to someone who understands 😭😭😭
Like let adriennette happen. Let it happen. BUT AT LEAST LET THE GHOST OF LADYNOIR HAUNT THEM. Let it be a question mark. A brushed away thought. An untapped yearning. Don’t give us one tsukuyomi episode and then act as if that wiped the slate of four seasons of a situationship cleannnn 😭😭😭😭
I just feel so cheated. That season 4 finale. THE SEASON 5 POSTER. We were so sure and then we we were left with our hands empty empty empty
HI OMG!!! first of all PLEASE do not apologize because i seriously love love LOVE getting asks and i LOVE talking about ladynoir
secondly yes most of my free time is spent working on my ladynoir fic and when im on tiktok i see ladynoir edits and i am simultaneously so sad and so happy all the time. ALSO YEAH. like um i guess i get why they can't lean too heavy into ladynoir bc they are SO chemistry and we can't make them look like they're cheating on themselves but i MISS THEM and i want to see them so bad all the time. stanning ladynoir in s5 is like being obsessed w that one random side character and screaming crying throwing up when u see them show up on screen like YASSSS GO BABY GIRLS!
anyway i have decided to cope by being extremely delusional and overreading into every little thing ladynoir related on the show. and also overattributing value to every tiny interaction they have
i think ultimately no matter what we have to remember that ladynoir STILL has a romantic history and chat noir and ladybug did not fall in love with each other for no reason!! think of them rn as two people who almost dated and are now trying to be really chill and cool about the fact that they VERY RECENTLY got very uber sad and pissed about getting tricked into thinking they got married and had a family together AND now um boom suddenly they're both dating other people and its totally awesome and fun and they're not in a strange ambiguous situation anymore and now they have to NOT accidentally brush hands when theyre on patrol and this is a normal thing to think about
re the whole ladynoir arc and how things will play out I GENUINELY THINK adrienette will break up at some point bc this show IS like the drama show and it has a minimum of 3 more seasons left AND the love square is never be stable for long and ifl that will always be the message pre-reveal. like if u have 2 identities each that all constantly interact (ladynoir and adrienette) u will always eventually feel conflicted between both identities bc that's how perfect u r for each other! the whole point is that a reveal would eventually solve everything and thats why pre-reveal love square is always doomed. i love suffering btw. ANYWAY adrienette rn is interesting bc they're getting closer but also facing problems at the same time and i think their time as a couple will make them so very interesting like. as exes. SORRY im not preying on their downfall I HAVE ADRIENETTE VISIONS TOO and i think exes adrienette who r more comfortable w each other should have a fight someday where its v obvious they still want each other but idk theres like problems abound and shit. WOULDN'T THAT BE FUN <- crazy person
tldr i think the ghost of ladynoir will haunt them soon!! hopefully!! in the meantime lets be unnecessarily delusional!!!!!!!!! also lets talk about ladynoir all the time i always understand bro
#ask#ladynoir#mlbposting#i think i am not main tagging this just in case#IM NOT A HATER I LOVE ADRIENETTE#but some people get mad at the thought of an adrienette break up#even tho this is the Messy Show and its not like they wont have feelings anymore...........#intuition spoilers#i was referring to the scene at the end so .#just in case.......#ALSO THIS GOT SO LONG IM SORRY#HOPE U LIKE LONG UNNECESSARY RAMBLING
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HIIIIII!!!! Im new here and i would like feedback on this bkdk fic that I’m writing:))))) and i would just want some pointers or hopefully to find someone who would edit/help me write this story. PLEASE I NNED HELP i want to put it on ao3
Down hereeee
“””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””
A scream was heard throughout the kingdom- scratch that, more like a holler was heard. “Get out!!”, the voice sent shivers down people's spines. Everyone in town ran to see the commotion, knowing the possessor of the ear-splitting screech, but not the reason.
When the people of the town got close enough to the castle, they could see The Mad Prince, Izuku- No one dared to say that to him, but that is the name he garnered over the years.
Anyways, the prince could be seen throwing a peculiar looking man with red and white hair, out of the castle doors. It was strange because royalty or people of high status only colored their hair, and on rare occasions some people were born with it, like izuku.
Someone had recognized the man as Prince Todoroki and yelled his name asking him what he was doing there?, and that is when Izuku turned and stated in a very loud voice “ This Prince-“ laced with disgust as if he was going to throw up any moment .” Has tried to defile me in undesirable ways!’’ Many scrunched up their faces and some gasped, they had thought the man was a goner! Then the prince started again while Todoroki was being restrained by guards, it had begun to rain and the ground the town’s people were stepping in started to soften. many, including Todoroki only had a simple tunic on. Izuku's hair began to soak as the rest of the people.
“ I had refused his advances many times and he wouldn’t give up” Izuku yelled venom lacing his words as if he wanted the man's head. The detained prince tried to object, but a hard slap stopped his words in his tracks. Multiple townsfolk shrieked while holding their faces as if they got hit. Then Izuku continued, his eyes apparent with rage “ this man won't ever step foot in this kingdom… and if he does the next time you’d see him is BURNING AT A STAKE” he yelled convulsively shaking, eyes bulging out of his eyes, lightning striking multiple times behind the castle as if he were in a movie.
Finally losing his temper- not that he was holding it to begin with. He had motioned to the guards to take the red and white haired prince to his home kingdom, and began to walk away until he heard a cry.
“ I'm sorry!… please don’t do this- i thought you l-loved me!” Todoroki sobbed roughly, terrified of the consequences of his actions. It was so pitiful, Izuku chuckled under his breath, bringing his hand up to stop himself. He turned his neck showing the side of his face. “ I don’t recall ever saying that? Hmm..” he said in a mockingly innocent manner, putting his index finger to his chin and arching his eyebrow as if he was trying to remember. Slyly smiling as he turned his head walking away, water squelching as he walked. You could hear Todoroki gasp for air as if he couldn’t believe what he heard. His eyes widened in betrayal
The guards took the pervert away, metal stomping against the water making tiny splashes. He cried and begged Izuku but the green prince wouldn’t look back. He shut the castle door and Todoroki choked realizing that he was royally fucked. The people of the town eyed Todoroki as if he were a monster, even though izuku was crazy he was sweet to the people and they’d go to war for him. One person went so far and threw dirt at the perverse prince as the guards dragged him away. The whole time he kept thrashing and screaming to break free but it was no use. The guards threw him in the carriage and they took him away
“ YOU'LL PAY FOR THIS!! YOU FUCKING PSYCHO” was the last thing anyone heard of the pervert while the drove him away, the murder laced in his voice was terrifying enough but the look on his face was worse the rage in his eyes, his grinding against each other and the dried tears on his face. Everyone had an eerie feeling about him, its like they knew he’d be back.
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A breathy exhale out his nose, Izuku flops on the sofa in his room. Mentally exhausted, he curls up shivering, breath quickening, shoulders shaking. Fisting his hair roughly, trying to stabilize his emotions. His chest collapses inward, tears form while his lips quiver. Why me ?!….why is it always me?…why can't I be loved- a painful sob broke his thoughts. Izuku didn’t want to be bitter, he didn’t want people to fear him, he knows he is loved bye the people but they’re scared, he can't show too much vulnerability he’ll seem weak. Hitting his hands against his head,gasping for air sobs becoming violent, no one saw him. No one will ever see him, if they get too close- “no no no no” he muttered , shaking his head , tears and snot rushing to the side of his face. He would never let anyone get close.
He sat there and cried for a while, when he calmed down he took his fancy looking tunic off and went into his bathroom, stopping to look at himself. Looking at his deep green curls, the messed up glitter on his face, his red nose and puffed up eyes. The dried tears on face and the smeared light pink lipstick on his face, he looked real, he didn’t look all made up and perfect. He breathed in and exhaled deeply and smiled softly, lips barely curling and walked into his shower feeling new.
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Laughter could be heard loud and thunderous throughout the red castles “ That’s fucking hilarious!! “ Prince Katsuki cackled, talking to his best man in his dressing room, “yeah dude! He was shaking!” His red haired friend exclaimed. “ he really slapped the fucker…, whew! I didn’t think greenie had it in him” Katsuki said wiping tears from his eyes from laughing too much, he always hated Todoroki so getting his ass handed to him really boosted his mood. “ What?! Izuku is feared by A LOT of kingdoms!” Kirishima said, in emphasizing ‘A lot’ as if this was common knowledge. Katsuki gave him a quizzed face wondering if they were talking about the same person,he opened his mouth but before he could inquire some people came in and told him it was time for him to walk down the aisle.
————————————————————————————————————————
He sighed softly and looked at his bride,uncertain but in love he smiled. He knew he had some infatuation with her. She had looked as beautiful as a flower in a lonesome desert, no one could compare to her beauty he thought. He felt like he was moving in slow motion but he just wanted to get to her, that’s all he wanted, that’s all he ever wanted. In the corner of his eye he spotted Izuku, and his breath caught woah.. he thought but shook his thoughts. He had scared himself and he started to doubt his thoughts , then he looked at his bride and all of his worries washed away.
When he got to her-his love, his eyes widened and softened he grabbed her hands and held them and looked in her eyes. The priest said whatever he said- Katsuki wasn’t listening he kept thinking about izuku, it quizzed him but he snapped to reality. “ Speak now or forever hold your peace” the priest said, those words would forever scar him. “ I love you!!! Please don’t marry him!” A voice yelled from out of he audience. Katsukis heart sank his eyes moving erratically, he looked at his bride and back at the crowd, he let go harshly let got of her hands, his throat contracting “ what?” His voice broke nose flaring, he kept looking in her eyes hoping he could get anything, but she couldn’t even look him in the eyes. He backed away, he felt lost, all the time they’ve spent, all the ‘I love yous’ was for nothing.. his eyes burned and he started to breath as if he was out of breathe shaking his head, he couldn’t believe what he heard, his ears were ringing and heart was beating loudly, he looked at the girl her head was down and she was wincing like she was expecting to get hit, he didn’t even yell. He ran, he ran as fast as he could out of the castle. Turning corridors, running through halls he pushed the door open, feeling the sun hit his face. He cried, broke down on his knees holding his chest.
” Hey” a soft voice said. A calming hand was placed on Katsukis back rubbing circles , the voice began to speak again but stopped, running was heard from inside etching closer to the door. “ Be ok” the voice said quietly but reassuringly, then the hand returned to its owner and the person walked away. Katsuki looked up for the first time and saw a blurry silhouette with green hair moving away, “ ill try” katsuki whispered, and the silhouette stopped as if he heard him then continued to walk away. Kirishima came out the door and shook katsuki asking him if he was okay. Katsuki kept looking at Izuku everything was slow he didn’t take his eyes off of him. Izuku got in his carriage and finally looked back at katsuki, nodding at him and softly smiling while the horses started to trot. Katsukis eyes widened a little, his heart was beating fast and he merely nodded back. Eyes following the carriage as it drove away.
“ KATSUKI!” The red haired boy yelled in his ear, snapping him out of his trance. “ WHAT” katsuki yelled back “ are you ok?!!” Kirishima worried, katsuki wobbly sighed and looked in the air “ I will be”. “ I guess that’s enough for right now” kirishima said calmly plopping him self next to Katsuki nudging his shoulder, “ yeah” katsuki breathed
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“ YOU DID WHAT??!!” Shinsou spat his tea, “ what it just felt right!!I felt bad?” He exclaimed confused, curling his shoulders and moving back hiding by his tea. “ its not a bad thing it’s just…. Unlike you??” Shinsou gestured his hands side to side like he was trying to feel his answer looking confused. Izuku frowned, unlike me ? He thought “ what do you mean ?? You think I’m mean??!” Izuku worried, shinsou looked up at him confused but hurried his answer” NO- no no ! I’m saying that you don’t talk to people like him” shinsou tensed his shoulders up and looked to the side, tilting his head in the same direction. Like him?? Izuku quizzed “ People like him?” Izuku questioned, Shinsou looked alarmed
, he looked in izukus eyes as if he were joking. When he realized he was not he sighed “ izuku… darling, people like Katsuki are..well… aggressive and we shouldn’t associate with them” he said condescendingly, taking his hand and looking at him like a child, as if he couldn’t understand. That made Izuku uncomfortable and ticked off but he couldn’t say it so he just agreed and switched the conversation, ‘darling’ put a bad taste in his mouth.
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Izuku got a letter, he sat down at his study lighting a candle while drinking some tea. He opened the letter, it read,
Hi, this is katsuki, I just wanted to say thank you I guess for that.
Izuku smiled, he didn’t think his words would stick with katsuki, but he continued.
We are having a get together tomorrow night, with a few of the kingdom's princesses and princes.
I would like to invite you-
Izuku choked on his tea. He's inviting me!!!?? He thought coughing.
I think you’re cool enough to come or whatever
Izuku could tell that part was written fast because it was all sloppy. Was he embarrassed? Izuku chuckled
Anyways you don’t have to write back just show up or don’t whatever I don’t care.
He cared
The location is by creek in the forest at the border between The heart kingdom and yours, the time is preferably late, around 10, wear something you wouldn’t mind getting wet.
Bye.
Izuku already had a an idea what he was going to wear, he was excited. He knew he couldn’t tell Shinsou about this.
———————————————————————————————————————
Katsuki felt like shit but he really wanted to go to the little thing he had planned, it had been maybe two weeks since the whole incident and it wasn’t so popular anymore, and he’s been coping. He still thought about her and he’d call her name forgetting that she wasn’t there , but it was ok.
He got off the bed groaning, walking in the bathroom he saw his reflection in the mirror, he looked….interesting. That’s what we are going to call him, he groaned and got in the shower, hissing as the hot water hit his back, he turned his head and swore he saw her but it wasn’t real, he’s been seeing her from time to time but its only glimpses and he was painfully reminded that she wasn’t there, and that shed ran off with someone else.
Katsuki picked up a black shirt and put it on, flexing his muscles to fit in it. It was a little tight but that’s how he liked it. He had also put on some white knee high shorts, and a slide type shoe. He'd almost walked out but he had put a coat like item on so he wouldn’t be exposed, he walked outside getting in his carriage and left.
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It was probably like 10:40 and Katsuki was sure izuku wasn’t coming, he was a little disappointed but it’s whatever.
“Damn suki he stood you up” said the infamous ‘Pink Princess’ chuckling while she nudged his shoulder. Katsuki grunted while rolling his eyes “ stop with the ‘suki’ shit… and he didn’t “stand me up” I told him he could come if he wanted too” he replied with quotations while looking at his friends messing around the fire while drinking idiots he snorted.
“Yeah whatever” she said joining them before Katsuki could retort, “ asshole!” He yelled.
He sat there drinking for a while and then he heard a snap of a twig, he almost dropped his drink and it startled him, when he turned around he saw him.
Izuku was wearing a deep teal chemise with a medium length train in the back, it had greenish blue and green streaks in it. His pants were black and tight, like a stretchy material? His hair oh..- his hair was so curly t the curls were perfectly placed, some out of his face and some in front. He was so shiny and his face looked glittery, in the moonlight he shined like the moon was there to spotlight him.
“Woah,” Katsuki murmured out loud, his eyes widened and his lips parted.”Excuse me?” Izuku chuckled, pulling his hand up to cover his face, Katsuki coughed “ nothing, sorry um hey.” Izuku was amused. “ Hi!, Im izuku if you can't tell” he said smiling, it was just silent. Izuku looked at Katsuki, he just looked dumbstruck. He could see the bags under his eyes. He must've had some rough nights. Izuku thought sadly, the silence got uncomfortable so he waved his hand in front of his face “ are you ok?” Izuku asked, he started getting worried.
“ Huh?..yeah! I'm ok..” Katsuki said, regaining his consciousness. “O…k?” Izuku said eyeing him. “ um.. they’re drinking over there if you want to join them” Katsuki said nonchalantly, it shocked Izuku because he totally switched his tone and attitude. “ hm?… I think I’ll stick with you, I mean it was soo nice for you to invite me ” Izuku said in a faux innocent voice looking up at Katsuki. Katsukis eyes widened for a little, he cleared his throat “ Ok… but, be careful Izuku i might be a little too much for you ” he said whispering raspy in Izuku's ear, and then backing away. Izuku gulped and cleared his throat, it was like Katsuki beat him at his own game. “ I can handle anything, “ he suggested. Katsuki didn’t respond, he just chuckled.
As the night progressed, izuku got hold of some wine or something he really didn’t know. It just made him really woozy. The other princes and princesses had joined them, it was The Heart Prince Kirishima and The Light Prince Kamanari, The Pink Princess from The kingdom of lust and a few others.
They were laughing around but izuku swore he heard a sort of ‘whisper’ it was calling him all night , he excused himself from the group and started to follow the voice.
“ Come here” it whispered , izuku turned and looked but he didn’t see anybody. Pushing through branches and bushes he continued into the forest.
“In here silly” the voice giggled, izuku looked around more and saw a light he tripped over too it “H-hello” Izuku hiccuped. He saw there was an opening, before he could go in an arm pulled him back. He whipped his head to see katsuki, “ what the fuck are you doing out here?” Katsuki said Izuku was going to answer but he was cut off.
“Come in and you’ll see” the voice purred
Izuku gave Katsuki a look saying, "Does that answer your question’.
“Are you coming?” The voice was getting inpatient
“ lets go” Izuku whispered gesturing to the cave, Katsuki thought he was stupid” it’s dangerous, no idiot” Katsuki hissed , izuku rolled his eyes and forced his arm out of his grip and ran in the cave “ scaredy cat” izuku whisper-yelled. Katsuki of course ran after him but then stopped after seeing a large orb glowing with an array of colors. Izuku stood in front it mesmerized.
“ like what you see?” The voice chuckled,” i can give you power wouldn’t you like that?”
Katsukis hand tightened and inhaled walking to the orb where izuku was
“ what do you mean?”katsuki spat replying to the thing
“ just touch me and see” the voice moaned with excitement
“What’s the catch?” Katsuki questioned, he was super sketched and izuku was just staring.
‘ ughhhhh you’re so boring, you’re not going to make this easy are you?” The voice sighed
“ no I’m not sorry I don’t touch random fucking orbs in caves” Katsuki said sarcastically.
“Ok, well sorry for this then” the voice said plainly , before Katsuki could say anything “ what?-"Izuku said before the orb got bigger and touched them instead.
The pair jumped back holding their arms.
The voice cackled “ look down”
Everything went so fast
The pair looked down, everything was glowing they looked at their arms , it was a stripe of light going up their arms. Katsukis was orange and Izukus was green, but Katsukis stripes ruptured into other lines like explosions?. He looked up at izuku and saw his were like lightning strikes in his arm reaching his neck, izuku looked at him “ I’m sorry” barely even whispering he looked as if he was going to cry.
Katsuki wasn’t going to go out like this, his anger built up and charged at the orb, thinking he could do some damage. Izuku followed him trying to stop but it was too late, Katsuki jumped on it and izuku was still grabbing him.
“This is going to be soooooo gooooood” the voice exclaimed laughing
They both got blasted back, landing on their back. Convulsing violently, feeling like they were being electrocuted, izuku grabbed Katsukis arm trying to withstand the pain
By this time they’re whole body had streaks of light. It looked cool but didn’t feel cool.
Izuku had started to holler, the pain was too much too bare, he patted his hand around to find something sharp. His hand met a rock, he grabbed and tried to plunge it into himself. But Katsuki had stopped him.
“We…can..do..this” Katsuki groaned, he was not going to give up on life. “ I’m…sorry,“ izuku said lightly. tears running down both of their faces” Be ok…” Katsuki whispered.
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“Sir, are you ok” a voice said, Izuku shot up, his eyes widened. “Woah! Calm down, you're ok,” the other man exclaimed, trying to get Izuku to lay down.” What happened !!? Where’s Katsuki? “ Izuku said practically screaming. The man had covered his ear, wincing at the screech, “ he’s just in the other room, I was told the other kingdoms princes and princess found you in a cave laying next to Katsuki….with throw up everywhere” the man said, lightly gagging at the thought of being covered in throw up.
“Oh…” izuku said looking down at his arm, there were little marks all across his arms. It wasn’t a dream izuku thought I DIDN'T DIE!? Eyes wide.
“I have to go to the restroom” Izuku announced, trying to get up but immediately falling after.” Woah, you can’t just get up like that sir you haven’t been up for two months” the man exclaimed running to the side of the bed to help him up. Izuku choked two months,
“ What?” Izuku rasped, the man sighed “ he woke up the other day, do you wish to go to the bathroom?’’. It took a while for the prince to respond.”… yes, i would” he said, collecting himself, giving the man a sheepish smile.
#writerscommunity#boku no hero academia#bakugo katuski#bnha deku#katsuki x izuku#mha izuku#bakugou x midoriya#bakudeku#fanfic#mha fanfiction#tumblr help#hlep me#this is a cry for help#feedback#critique
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another "overcoming the absolute hell of new post editor" tip: to work around the inability to toggle between new and old post editor without discarding changes, save your post as a draft, open make a new post, and switch to the other version of post editor on it. you can then edit draft of your original post, and it will be in the version of post editor you're currently switched to.
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oh editing. my savior. my vice. my best friend. my whatever the fuck that guys name in the bible was that betray jesus. my confidant.
#bones talks#anyways catch me screaming and crying and throwing up trying to make this paragraph sound smooth#i should just post it and say 'forget it'#but im too much of a perfectionist when it comes to my writing 🥺#and yet a lot of my works come out like shit 🤔#i should go back and edit that one fic...#oh well#ok no more procrastinating lol
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So this request is kind of exciting because it’s kind of complicated but I know you will put it into words flawlessly,
Tasm!xreader (obvi because Andrew is beautiful)
So I’m thinking that the reader is from tasm universe and she’s his gf that he couldn’t save… BUT BUT BUT….HE doesn’t know that at the exact moment she “died”…the avengers “blipped” everyone back and somehow in the multiverse craziness, her “soul” or whatever got tangled up in that and she ended up in the MCU as a Jane Doe obviously injured from the fall or whatever happened in tasm universe…and either she recovers in the hospital and tries to live a whole new life in this universe OR she’s been in a Coma state until NWH happens and the only thing that brings her back is tasm!peter being in that universe….you can make edits or whatever, you’re the writer but it’s just something I’ve been thinking about. ❤️❤️❤️
aurora
[tasm!peter parker x f!reader]
nwh spoilers | word count: 7.2k
summary: somehow within the blurred lines of the multiverse, your death is prevented by the snap of a green scientist’s fingers. replaced by a state of coma that can only be broken by the presence of someone from your universe— peter parker.
warnings: nwh spoilers, unedited, strong fairytale references (thus the title), angst, mentions of death, coma, injuries, fluff, overprotective!peter, lots of mcu!peter content, miraculous occurrences that we’ll just chalk up to the whole fairytale aspect lolol
note: thank you for this request! sorry for the extensive delay. i’ve been super behind on everything. also, i once read a brilliant fic with a very similar plot and i can’t for the life of me find the author so if anyone happens to find it, pls let me know!! <3 hope you enjoy this :)
He was having a nightmare again—the kind that wrapped its hands around his neck and squeezed until he was gasping for air. His eyes were glued shut, trapped in his mind as it replayed the worst night of his life over and over again…
Sirens surrounded the premises, their red and blue lights illuminating the clock tower in an array of colors.
But none of that mattered—your prime focus was staying alive. Your fingers desperately gripped at the web keeping you from falling to your death. All you could think about was the fact that your life was being held by a literal thread.
Then, you heard grunts and sounds of struggle, your vision darted past the web and up toward where Spider-Man was neck-to-neck with Harry Osborn.
As if he felt your stare, Peter glanced down at you. Even with the mask you could sense the utter terror that coursed through his veins at the sight of you hanging in mid-air.
It blinded him, distracting him from the fight and propelling his feet to rush toward you. His fingers almost grasped the web that was tied around one of the clock’s gears, but he was shoved away, landing meters from where you were now crying silently.
…You were accepting your death. Accepting that the possibility of you not coming back from this was greater than the chances of you touching the ground alive. A tingle on the back of Peter’s neck alerted him of your surrender, his soul being extraordinarily in tune with yours. Even the slightest change in your aura called to him louder than the sirens below…
Peter screamed your name, fighting off Harry’s advances but he was relentless, throwing punch after punch.
You glanced down foolishly… The distance seemed endless, a multitude of railing and gears filling the space but there was a clear shot straight to the bottom from where you hung helplessly. How convenient, you thought bitterly.
As if things couldn’t get worse—you were absolutely terrified of heights.
Trying to keep your heart from entering cardiac arrest, you started mumbling your favorite poem under your breath, lips quivering violently and tears burning as they trailed down your cheeks.
“How do I love thee? I love thee with a love I seemed to lose with my lost saints. I love thee with the breath, smiles, tears, of all my life…”
Peter’s head snapped over to you as soon as he heard the crack in your voice and the words you were reciting so quietly it was almost impossible for him to hear even with his abilities… It was a fragment of the poem you two would recite to each other, usually whenever one of you were wrecked with anxiety or hopelessness.
You’d hold each other’s hands to your lips and each recite line after line to each other until you were brought back to earth, anchored by the love you two shared… It was your favorite work of poetry, words of comfort you used to express your infinite love for his soul…
So his mouth turned dry when he heard the words being softly uttered below him, a quiet sob shaking your frame as you tried to finish.
He was too frightened to turn around, too frightened to glance down because he knew in this moment, he failed to keep the one promise he made to you:
That as long as he had the privilege of living on this earth with you, he’d keep you safe and loved. He’d give you everything you deserved.
… His moment of distraction sent him tumbling straight into the gear that was supporting your weight. Just as his arms were pinned down, the gears started shifting.
And that’s when everything started moving in slow-motion for Peter.
… The hour hand suddenly moved, the clock kicking into gear and sending your web straight into a cluster of metal. He stuck his foot in the metal to keep your web from snapping.
Straining against Harry’s hold, he stole glances at you, foot already giving out against the mighty strength of the clock tower.
And maybe he would’ve been able to hold it off if he hadn’t simultaneously been pushing Harry away.
The other hand moved suddenly, Peter catching it a moment too late.
The machinery sparked, pushing against the resistance until suddenly it all came apart with a huge bang! The hour and minute hands spun out of control as your web tangled with the exploding gear, snipping your only chance of living…
“…and, if God choose…I shall but love thee better after death,” you finished in your last gasp.
—
… For a moment you couldn’t remember why you were so scared of heights… the fall was peaceful… like floating in a body of water. It was the most free you’d ever felt.
That is until you opened your eyes and felt the sticky grip of Peter’s web connect to your torso. But the distance from where you’d started and where you were at suddenly clicked in your brain and a flash of white-hot blinding terror shot through you before—
His body shot up from bed, his mind finally releasing its vicious hold. His lungs ached, desperately yearning for air and never getting enough to calm the racing in his chest.
Peter Parker was finally awake, reeling from the memory as he did every night since your tragic death. But even after he woke, the pain lingered… with no end in sight.
Your side of the bed remained empty and cold, and his soul was still missing its other half.
No amount of torturing himself would bring you back. And it was a tough pill Peter had to swallow every day.
Like every morning, he pulled himself from the cold bed and over to the bathroom. His hands gripped the edges of the sink with extraordinary strength; the evidence of his turmoil was in the little cracks forming in the wood. Any day now, the sink would quite literally break under his trembling grip and then that’d be another problem he’d have to deal with…
His eyes were vacant, drained of emotion as he went through the motions of his daily routine— splashing his face with icy water, brushing his teeth, eating a quick breakfast without savoring its flavor (he didn’t care much for food anymore, it was just a necessity to keep him running), putting on his suit and aimlessly swinging along the city…sometimes stopping crime when he saw it but mostly keeping to himself.
He wasn’t worthy of saving anyone.
You were the one person who deserved to live a beautiful, long life and it was his foolishness that got you killed…
Because Spider-Man believed he had it all figured out— that he could beat death, but it was amateur thinking.
Actually, he knew nothing of using his powers responsibly, believing his webs could save everything when he physically couldn’t.
But it was his web that killed you— it was no one’s fault but his own.
Though it had almost been a year since the unthinkable happened, your face was still engraved in his mind like it was yesterday…
Your beautiful eyes framed by your wispy lashes. The way they hung over your sparkling irises whenever you’d look up at him. Your skin, beautiful and perfect in complexion, soft against his fingers whenever he’d graze over your cheeks. And the way your hair hung around the frame of your face delicately… and your lips— well that was his favorite thing about you. Ethereal in the way they’d curl around the syllables that fell off your tongue. Addicting in the way they’d dance against his deliciously.
How he longed to hear your melodious tone speak his name once more. To hear your soft giggles and the way you would recite the words of your favorite poem…
It destroyed him that he was powerless in helping you through your last moments. An overwhelming guilt choked him whenever he remembered your death was so painful, that you didn’t instantly find peace as soon as his web gave you that fatal whiplash. That even after you hit the ground, somehow your heart continued to beat weakly.
That same night was the first time the public had seen the merciless side to Spider-Man, the shell of the man he used to be…
A second after he desperately threw his web to catch you, he realized his mistake…
Watching the white substance wrap around your waist was like feeling hope for the first time in years and then it being violently snatched away.
His suit clung to his skin uncomfortably as he struggled to move his limbs. It felt like thousand-pound weights were tied to his legs, making the initial dive after your body slower than he intended. Bile rose to his throat — blood rushed to his ears — he wanted to scream but his mind couldn’t control his body.
It just felt like one big disconnection, seeing your inevitable fate and knowing he was absolutely powerless to stop it.
It felt like one cruel joke…
… Snap!
There it was, the confirmation that your human body wouldn’t withstand the elasticity of his web. His creation that he specifically catered to his supernatural strength. Something meant to aid him in keeping you safe.
In real time, the seconds were too short, not long enough for him to possibly send multiple webs your way. It wasn’t enough time to properly support your frame…
So, Peter’s mind sent him into a safe place—one he knew was impossible but the pain of losing you was too great… He went into a state of denial.
As soon as he touched the ground, his legs dragged him over to your still figure. It was as if he were a puppet, someone else controlling the strings.
Glass cut into the fabric of his suit, digging into his skin as he dropped to his knees, but he didn’t care. His mask was discarded as soon as he got close enough to see the blood trickling down your cheek. The sirens disappeared into the loud ringing in his ears; your slow, thready heartbeat was the only thing he could hear…
“Y/N?” He gathered you in his arms gently, bringing you close to his suit-clad chest. Your painful struggles for air put him through utter hell.
It didn’t take his Spidey senses to know you were slipping away. There was no way you could survive the crack he heard in your bones.
“Hi—hi,” you whispered. Your eyes were closed, and they were too heavy for you to open anyway. Even the simple word was excruciating to deliver, shocks coursing up and down your spine until the agony eased into numbness.
“Sweetheart, open your eyes for me,” Peter begged. “Please.”
You wanted to. God, you wanted to. But there wasn’t much strength left in you; there was only your will to survive and even that was hanging by a thread. The only reason you hadn’t given up the fight is because you refused to die in Peter’s arms…
Even if dying in the arms of someone you love seemed like the most peaceful way to go… you knew it would destroy him if he witnessed your last breath.
Thankfully, the officers were rushing toward the tower, their footsteps thundering close by. “Please, please.”
A sob wracked his body, followed by another until he was rocking back and forth in anguish. “Please,” he brushed the hair away from your face. His fingers were smeared with your blood, stained crimson.
“I can’t…It’s hard.” Who knew a whisper could be this exhausting?
“I know it is,” he sniffled. “I just want to see your eyes, pretty girl.”
Your lips curled into a weak smile, blood staining your teeth. His pet names always made nervous butterflies swirl in your stomach. Despite the promise of death around the corner…
“I love you…” That’s all you could offer, gladly using your last breath to express just how much you adored Peter Parker.
He completed you like perfect pieces in a puzzle. You wouldn’t be you without him.
The biggest blessing in your short time on this earth was knowing someone with a soul so dazzling it was nearly blinding to gaze upon. And it was your greatest privilege to have been able to love him and be loved in return. The simple fact alone made your departure comforting.
The endless silence took over, muting Peter’s gut-wrenching screams and the commotion of dozens of officers demanding him to step away from your body.
… And you were gone before you could witness Spider-Man’s sudden act of violence, lashing out as he was surrounded, numerous hands grasping at his shoulders to pull him away.
The last thing he cared about was his damn mask, but his identity was something you heavily guarded when you were alive. The least he could do was conceal his face.
Fully suited, Peter shot a web toward a gun that was pointed at him, pulling it away from the officer’s hands and swinging it far from reach.
Unbearable pain turned into uncontrollable anger... All the while he kept your limp body pressed against his. Your pulse was barely there, skin cold and unresponsive.
In his rage to fight off all the forces trying to rip him away from you, he failed to notice the other enforcement that arrived on the scene, dozens of guns aimed at his body.
Behind the mask, his expression dropped. All the anger disappeared until there was only ice-cold fear. “No,” he stuttered, raising a hand to pathetically shield you. “She’s alive. She-she’s alive! Don’t shoot. Please don’t shoot.”
“Step away son,” the officer closest to him demanded, gun still raised.
“You don’t understand,” he pleaded through tears. “She needs help—she needs help.”
“Step away and we’ll get her the help she needs.” The officer was unrelenting, slowly raising his radio to ask for immediate medical assistance.
But that was the last thing Peter wanted to do. His hands tightened around your frame. “I can’t leave her,” he shook his head aggressively. “No, no, no, let me go. Let me go!”
Hands grasped at his arms again, pulling him away so the medical personnel could lift your body onto a gurney. His strength was gone, weak from torturous grief.
Then Peter watched you disappear into an ambulance.
And despite his best efforts to figure out which hospital you’d been taken to, that was the last time he ever saw you.
To this day, he had no information of where you’d been taken to. There was no funeral or memorial… no tomb… nothing for him to grasp at other than the old traces of your presence in his apartment:
Your extra set of keys… your favorite poetry book… the mug you religiously drank from every morning… the stuffed animals you kept in the corner of the bedroom that he found absolutely pointless and a waste of space, but you didn’t care—you loved those little things…
—
… In the months after your death, Peter tried to continue being New York’s hero. It’s what you would’ve wanted, but the wound was too fresh. He wasn’t sure there was ever an end in sight… So it caused him to become bitter, resentful— angry toward the world for constantly working against him when all he ever did was sacrifice everything for the world.
So when Spider-Man should’ve held back, Peter didn’t— he stopped pulling his punches. And it caused him to create a few enemies along the way but he couldn’t find it in himself to care.
But sometimes he did his part—stopped a burglary or saved a dog from the road— to appease his guilt from failing you, but he mostly just stuck to himself.
Alone.
It was extremely late when Peter decided to leave his apartment for a quick swing.
He was feeling a sudden burst of energy, unusual for his zombie-like state but he grasped at the sensation, pulling on his suit and jumping through the window of his sixth story apartment. For the first time in months, there was an inkling of hope in his chest. A warmth he couldn’t quite explain.
A holler left his lips as he swung through the streets of New York City, reaching Manhattan in record time.
As he swung over Greenwich Village, something in the air suddenly changed. As if he hit an invisible wall, sending him flying toward the closest building. He landed on the roof with a bang!
His body rolled a few times before he came to a stop, groaning from the impact.
“What the—” the Amazing Spider-Man looked up at the sky but there was no wall, nothing that would’ve sent him tumbling off his course the way he did.
…Rattled, Peter opted for a walk, trying to figure out why he suddenly felt so strange.
Like he was walking around in the wrong skin…
“You have some nerve walking around in that suit,” a stranger spat as he walked on the sidewalk. His vicious glare sent a chill down Peter’s spine.
“What?” He was confused.
The stranger sneered at him, shoving his shoulder. “Little punk.”
As he briskly passed, something was shoved into Peter’s chest. A newspaper.
Quickly, he grabbed it before it could fall. Furrowing his eyebrows, he flipped the paper over. It was a picture of… Peter Parker?
SPIDER-MAN IS PETER PARKER: PUBLIC ENEMY NUMBER ONE!
He stared at the picture incredulously, feeling extremely small…
Because the boy staring back at him… was not Peter Parker.
[in a hospital in queens, hours later]
“Hey, Ms. Sloan! How are ya?” A teenage Peter Parker (native of this universe) waved at the front desk the next morning, gliding through the hospital hallways until he reached the usual room—145B. Just as he was going to push the door open, Ms. Sloan came running down the hallway.
Ms. Sloan never left the front desk, Peter thought suspiciously. He gave her a strange look, hand lingering on the handle. “Is everything okay?”
“Well, I’m glad to inform you there’s been an update with this patient,” she started. “It appears she’s finally woken up—”
Peter heard a rustle on the other side of the door and he wasted no time, rushing in before she could finish.
And alas, awake you were…
The Jane Doe he’d found months ago during one of his patrols as Spider-Man. You were severely injured, barely breathing by the time he got to you but the doctors were able to resuscitate you.
…It struck him as odd that no one was ever able to identify you, especially given the fact that Peter had this strange feeling in his gut that somehow, he knew you…
Something about you pulled him in and it suddenly got personal— the hero visiting every week as Peter Parker, “the high school student that witnessed Spider-Man save the girl and who wanted to check up on her…”
The hospital staff found it sweet that someone cared for her so they let it slide.
…Obviously, when his identity was exposed to the entire world, Peter no longer had to keep up the ruse. The entire staff knew Spider-Man was the one checking up on her this entire time.
… And now here you were—finally awake and staring at him with curious eyes.
“Oh my God…” Peter breathed. “Hi.”
“Um, hi,” you waved awkwardly, disorientated from the news you’d received about your coma. “Who are you?”
When you’d woken up, the first thing you asked for was your boyfriend. You were relieved when the nurse informed you that Peter Parker had been visiting every week since your accident, and you waited with excitement when she told you he should be in sometime today.
“I’m Peter… Peter Parker,” the stranger stammered.
You gave him a strange look. “No, you’re not.”
The stranger gaped like a fish. “I am.”
“You’re not,” you argued. “You are absolutely not my boyfriend.”
“You’re right,” the boy agreed, staring at you wide-eyed.
Alarmed, you tried to decide if you wanted to hit the help button or drag some answers out of the stranger that apparently visited you every week. You were leaning toward the former and he seemed to notice. “Um— look I have no idea who you are. I just found you dying in an alley and dragged you to this hospital.”
That was blunt… but effective, halting your movements before you could punch the red button.
You bit your lip, eyes darting around the room to stare at anything but Peter.
Concerned, the boy stared at you carefully. It was like standing in a room with a ticking time bomb. He had no idea who you were or what you were capable of. Though he didn’t feel the tingle that usually alerted him of danger.
“I’m confused,” you started shakily. “You found me in an alley?”
“…yeah.”
“And you’re… Peter Parker?”
“…yes?”
You rubbed your face. “I’m so fucking confused.”
Peter loudly received a notification on his phone but you stared at each other silently, neither moving a muscle.
You narrowed your eyes. “So… are you gonna check that or—”
“Yeah! Yeah, hang on—” Peter dug his phone from his pocket, reading the text he’d finally received from Flash Thompson.
the MIT administrator should be heading to the airport now there’s a lot of traffic tho so you might be able to catch up with her🏃♂️
“I gotta go,” Peter blurted. He was already making a quick exit when he suddenly glanced back at you. “I’ll be back.”
“Okay?” was all you could say, too weak to stand up from your bed and too confused to even try. Your waving hand fell limp beside your leg…
…Alone again, you thought about what the doctor had told you when you woke up… that you were severely injured when you were brought in by Spider-Man and while the damage was extensive, you ended up making a full recovery (well, besides the chronic pain you might experience in the future).
But among all the news you’d received today, only two discoveries left you reeling in shock:
One— You were in a coma for about seven months
And two— this Peter Parker wasn’t your Peter Parker…
Your breath hitched, dread consuming you as you looked around your plain hospital room.
The last thing you remembered was falling from the clock tower and hearing your Peter’s voice begging you to wake up…
A lightbulb went off in your head, pressing the button to call a nurse into your room. As soon as she entered, you fired question after question.
“Am I in New York City?”
“Yes,” the nurse smiled kindly.
“What day is it?”
“November 20th 2024, dear.”
2024?! Yes, it confirmed your theory. Multidimensional reality and matter displacement…
Either that or you’re just dead. In the afterlife you supposed.
Otherwise, how could you have gone from the year 2014 to 2024 in a matter of months?
You gulped. “I’ve been a coma for seven months, yeah?”
“That’s correct, dear. Is there anything more you can tell us? Your name, any family we can contact?”
Hesitantly, you told her your name, avoiding her questions about family and trying to figure out how you were going to leave the hospital. Your mind was racing with ideas on how to successfully make it back to your dimension— that is if your theory was correct. A theory you’d spent most of your life studying (the plan was to attend Columbia as a Physics major).
There was also a peculiar feeling in your chest, as if a string was pulling you in a certain direction far from the hospital. But seeing as you were too weak to even leave the bed, you swallowed your anxiety and watched the news on the little tv in your room, in between various tests and consults.
…Just as you began to think about this earth’s Peter Parker, you suddenly saw him on the news! Just like your Peter, this one was also Spider-Man, suited up on the Hamilton bridge and fighting a man with… octopus tentacles?
Despite the intense battle, you admired his suit, impressed by the nanotech.
And that was the breaking news of the afternoon, the most interesting part of your day.
The rest of the time, you spent fretting over your Peter Parker. Wondering if he was okay— if he thought you were dead.
Was he faring well? Did he move on? How long has it actually been? You may have arrived in a universe of a different timeline but was it still 2014 over there? Or had ten years passed?
Your heart monitor suddenly spiked, everything hitting you all at once. You ripped the electrodes off your chest in a panic.
Something wasn’t right with this universe… If there was a chance you could find your way back to your home dimension, then you needed to find Peter Parker.
After aimlessly swinging above the streets of Manhattan from sunrise all the way to sunset, Peter finally found himself in a deserted alley, breathing heavily as he stared at the damp floor.
He wasn’t sure what to do, feeling like a criminal even when his face didn’t match the Peter Parker they were attacking.
The Amazing Spider-Man paced the length of the alley, hidden by the night’s shadows.
A flash of orange caught his attention and he raised a hand to shield his eyes from the blinding light. Warily, he kept his distance from the forming circle.
Am I on drugs? He thought in astonishment.
The circle cleared, the sparks still bright but he could see what it led to— a pair of teenagers (probably around his age) and a living room.
“Peter! That’s him! Peter!” “Peter!”
He was perplexed, slowly jogging over to the portal before jumping through it swiftly. By some act of magic, Peter Parker actually landed in this random living room.
A lady he hadn’t seen in the corner suddenly screamed, throwing a pillow in his direction.
“Wait— no, no, no! I’m a nice guy, hang on!” Spider-Man ripped the mask off, revealing his young face. One of the teenagers raised her hands in defense.
“Who the hell are you?”
“I’m Peter Parker,” he explained. “I’m Spider-Man in my world but then last night, I was just… I was just here.”
Fascinated by the space, he slowly started to wander around with child-like excitement. Something he hadn’t felt in almost a year. “String theory, multidimensional reality, and matter displacement? All real?”
The two teenagers nodded blankly.
“She called it,” Peter smiled. He was wonderstruck, feeling giddy that all the theories you’d shared with him were actually true. Every time you and Peter would gush about the idea of a multiverse, it wasn’t just nonsense!
If only you were here to see this…
The grief came rushing back but this time, he didn’t let it numb his emotions… Peter wanted to be excited… for you.
And excited he was— practically bouncing as he explored the area.
“Prove it,” the girl said suddenly.
Peter faltered. “Prove what?”
“That you’re Peter Parker,” she clarified.
… After getting attacked by a roll of bread and a humiliating moment later, Peter successfully convinced the two teenagers, who later introduced themselves as MJ and Ned, of his identity.
Then another portal later (he was still awestruck that magic was real here) and there were two Peter Parkers in the same room, one in a suit and the other dressed like a regular civilian…
… “I just have these feeling that he needs my help,” the other Peter was explaining to MJ and Ned.
“Our help,” the suited Peter added, clearing his throat as the strange sensation from earlier returned. Like he was being pulled toward something he couldn’t quite place. “… and this might sound weird but I think there’s something in this universe I’m meant to find… I don’t know what it is but it’s been nagging at me since I got here.”
MJ and Ned shared a glance.
“I don’t know, man,” Ned answered awkwardly. “Maybe you’ll find what you’re looking for when we find the real Peter.”
“Ouch,” the normally dressed Peter winced.
Suited Peter gave him an understanding look. “That’s what I said.”
“We need to figure out where he is,” MJ sighed.
The dysfunctional group sat in silence until the older Peter perked up.
“I think I might have an idea,” he said thoughtfully.
Escaping the hospital was a whole ordeal, requiring some men in black type shit you were more than thrilled to perform.
It was one of your lifelong dreams to sneak around like a undercover agent and to your surprise, you actually succeeded.
Satisfied, you walked down the streets of Queens, donned in the clothes you’d been wearing the night you saw Peter last. The clothes you “died” in.
Thankfully, the staff kept it in the closet of your room, clean and folded in case you ever woke up from your unconscious state.
You felt rejuvenated after using some pocket change (which thankfully they also left untouched in your pocket) to grab a milkshake and a greasy slice of pizza.
There was nothing better than the pizza in New York, no matter what universe it was.
Sipping on your shake, you suddenly choked when you glanced up and saw a familiar sight hanging off the top of a building. It couldn’t be…
Yes. It was Spider-Man!
You thanked the heavens above as you discarded your milkshake, hurrying your pace so you could find someway onto the roof of the building.
It appeared to be a school— Midtown School of Science and Technology to be exact.
You fought an aggressive eye roll. Out of all places, you would end up at your old high school.
Trying the doors, you were pleasantly surprised when they swung open easily. It took some trial and error but you eventually found the staircase, running up until you made it to the very top.
Out of breath, you leaned forward and placed your hands on your knees for a moment
Then you finally pushed the door open, your hair tossed by the strong breeze.
But what you found was not at all what you expected…
Yes, you found this universe’s Peter Parker, the kind boy who kept you company throughout your months in a coma, but you also found four other people…
A girl who looked around the same age as you, a boy standing beside her like a deer in headlights, an older middle-aged man who appeared to recognize you, and…
No. It couldn’t be. You suddenly saw through tunnel vision, eyes narrowing in on every detail of the man who stood before you.
He looked the same really, his youthful features frozen in shock. Though his hair was longer and his eyes seemed heavier.
You couldn’t stop the tears from forming as you gazed upon the love of your life.
“Pete…” you breathed, forgetting everyone else.
All at once, his whole world seemed to cave in. His chest felt like it weighed a thousand pounds and his lungs refused to work properly.
You were alive. Breathing. Standing in perfect health and staring at him with those eyes… Oh God those beautiful eyes.
Eyes he never thought he’d see again, eyes he begged to stare into one last time as he held your dying figure. Eyes that caused his world to tilt off its axis and revolve around you. Solely you.
This couldn’t be real. He must be dreaming; he had half a mind to actually reach up and pinch himself but then you were suddenly crossing the rooftop with determined strides.
You ached to feel his body pressed against yours. To hold him in your arms again because God knows you never thought you’d be able to again.
Peter finally realized he was awake, that he hadn’t died and gone to heaven. That you were real, made of flesh and bone, when your bodies collided.
Familiar arms wrapped around his neck and pulled him close until there wasn’t a hint of space left.
You vaguely felt him slowly run his hands along the sides of your waist until they slipped under the fabric of your shirt and felt the warmth of your skin. The blood pumping through your veins and the steady pulse of your heart beating against his chest.
Then his body melted into yours. His hands were spread along your healed back, arms tight around your body.
To you, hearing his gut-wrenching sobs over your imminent death felt like yesterday but you could tell from his sobs of relief that it had been some time since he’d been able to cradle you to his chest. “This can’t be real,” he whispered into your hair shakily. “This isn’t real.”
“It is,” you assured softly. “I’m here. It’s okay.”
And in that moment, the world melted away until it was just you and Peter on that rooftop.
“How—how did this happen?”
After your miraculous reunion, the group had decided to convene in the school’s science lab. Each Peter Parker was to concoct a cure for their respective villains (well mostly). MJ, Ned and their Peter sat toward the front of the room, the older Peter a few tables away from you.
You sat huddled with your Peter, fingers interlaced with his, despite the extra difficulty of trying to make the cure with only one hand… He didn’t care if he went slower; he wanted to feel you at all times.
“I don’t know.” You wished you had more to offer him.
“You appeared around the time of the blip,” this universe’s Peter suddenly joined your table. “My guess is that the infinity stones somehow brought you to our universe and the only way you could wake up is if someone from your own plane was in this universe as well.”
His theory was solid— the most probable explanation but it didn’t stop you from giving him a strange look.
“Infinity stones?”
“The Blip?”
The other Peter looked confused too, mouth open as he tried to figure out how to explain the chaos of his universe. He opted to take the easy way out. “It’s hard to explain.”
“However, I got here… thank you for checking on me. Even if I was shitty company,” you smiled at him.
He looked rather bashful suddenly, shrugging as if it were no big deal. “You couldn’t really talk, you know. I wouldn’t call it shitty company… just quiet. I needed that sometimes.”
“Well, I’m glad I could help you in some way.”
Your Peter gave your hand a harsh tug, causing you to look over. He was giving you an incredulous look, jealously dancing somewhere behind his concerned gaze.
He couldn’t believe he was feeling jealous of… himself?
“Oh! Um—Peter here is the one who found me after the—” Your boyfriend’s gaze fell in shame. “—the— um—accident.” For lack of better word.
He looked between you and the other Peter Parker, and his heart sank when he realized a different Spider-Man saved you when he couldn’t.
What did that make him? The lesser hero? He couldn’t even save the love of his life.
Nevertheless, he felt overwhelmingly grateful, standing up to embrace your savior. This Peter had given him something he thought he’d never have again—a chance to build a future with you.
This universe’s Peter tensed up, awkwardly patting his back while keeping his eyes locked on yours.
Biting back a laugh, you stood up and pulled your boyfriend away gently, rubbing his shoulder as he sniffled.
Rubbing his eyes, he sat back on his stool, resuming his progress on the cure as if nothing happened. You and the other Peter shared a glance before he smiled and walked back to his station…
It was silent for a few moments. “So… did you find someone while I was gone?”
His head snapped up so fast you were surprised he didn’t get whiplash. (Maybe it was too soon for the whiplash jokes, but you couldn’t help it). “Why would you think that?”
Was he offended? “I just—I’d understand if you did.”
“No,” he breathed. “You were it for me, Y/N.”
“Well, I wouldn’t have wanted you to be alone—”
He grabbed your hands tightly, forcing your eyes on his. “It’s been seven months. Seven long months but there’s no measure of time long enough for me to let you go. I need you to understand that, Y/N.”
Your chest swelled with adoration. “I understand, Peter.”
“Good,” he smiled like you were his sun.
An hour passed and the cures were finally ready; the Peters were preparing for the final fight.
You’d spent some time with the older Peter, asking him about his home universe and he told you of his version of you in his world— you were married with three kids, happily living in the wonderful state of New York.
It shocked you to say the least—not the fact that the other version of you married this other version of Peter, but the fact that you were alive and healthy... Maybe the only idiotic version of you in the multiverse was… well, you.
Being accident prone and a bad decision maker was not a good combination.
… But now you were standing in front of the love of your life, arguing over your place in tonight’s battle.
According to Peter, you “absolutely had no place in the battle.” Your participation was out of question, and you could understand his concern over your safety but to ask you to stay with Ned’s grandmother? Absolutely not.
“I’ll stay with MJ and Ned and everything will be okay,” you assured for the millionth time. “I promise.”
Peter looked nervous. “I don’t know…”
Shaking your head, you started pushing him toward the open portal gently. “You’ve gotta go. The bad guys will start showing up any minute now and they need you.”
“Y/N, I love you,” he said, walking backwards so he could look into your eyes.
“I love you.”
With that, he was off, joining the other Spider-Men just in time for the battle to commence.
And everything was going smoothly until Connors jumped through the open portal, forcing you, Ned and MJ to flee. Despite your promise to Peter, you found yourself in the middle of the action, running down the steps of the Statue of Liberty as fast as you could.
You felt nauseous as you tried to avoid looking straight down. If your fear of heights was bad before your fall, it was fifty times worse now. Your limbs were shaking aggressively as you descended in wide turns, ignoring everything so you could focus on taking step after step.
The buzz of electricity reached your ears and you glanced up to find Electro hovering nearby, watching you with an indecipherable look. You didn’t give yourself the time to ponder on it, otherwise you would’ve realized he was reliving the memory of when he met you…
You were the first person to remember his name and treat him with respect. It’s what caused his hesitation as he watched your helpless figure run down the stairs.
Though his anger caused him to lash out at anybody and everybody, your familiar face was enough to make him falter.
It only took a second for Peter to take advantage of his distraction, swinging around the statue and snatching you away from Dillon. The ground beneath you disappeared, a chill going down your spine before you realized Peter had you in his arms. His hold was secure, and you were quickly approaching the ground safely.
Spider-Man landed smoothly, setting you down and pulling his mask off. You saw the worry in his eyes, the frown etched on his face. His cheeks were turning red.
It was long overdue, but you seized the moment—locking a hand around his neck and pulling him down to meet your lips in a passionate kiss. It was needy, the kind of kiss that took over all your senses until it almost felt like you were floating. And your only anchor was his pillowy lips against yours.
To Peter, this was everything he longed for. The best sensation he’d ever experienced in his life. Because you were his and he was yours. And nothing would tear you apart again.
This he knew.
… He leaned in, arching your back slightly as he tried to give you every part of him in this one kiss. “Stay,” he gasped against your lips.
You pulled away slowly, looking into his hooded eyes.
“Wasn’t planning on goin’ anywhere. The floor seems like a mighty nice place to be,” you put your hands on your hips and gave the ground an approving look.
It wasn’t a lie—you were pretty sure you’d never leave ground level again. Traumatized wouldn’t even begin to describe your utter terror for heights now.
The love of your life laughed musically, nodding and giving you one last look before he shot a web and swung to the top of the statue again.
Enamored, you stared after the Amazing Spider-Man, knowing in your heart that you wouldn’t want your life any other way.
.
.
.
.
the poem featured in this one-shot is “How Do I Love Thee” by Elizabeth Barrett Browning!
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huh??? did this make sense? you tell me cause i swear none of my writing does lololol.
thank you for reading, hope i didn’t obnoxiously over explain anything but i tried my best to avoid most plot holes!
some clarification if needed:
the time line is altered so that no way home takes place only a few months after the blip (as opposed to a year)
peter is still the same age as he was during the events of tasm2. don’t know if i made it clear enough but it’s only been a few months since y/n’s death. while tasm’s universe is still in the year 2014, mcu is obviously in 2024… beauty of the multiverse ✨
check out my masterlist !!
— elle <333
general/tasm!peter parker taglist:
@idli-dosa @nikkitc0703 @golden-hoax
#tasm!peter parker x reader#peter parker x reader#andrew!peter x reader#Andrew Garfield x reader#andrew!peter parker#andrew!peter parker x reader#andrew garfield#tasm!spiderman x reader#tasm x reader#the amazing spider-man#the amazing spider-man x reader#no way home#no way home spoilers#nwh spoilers#nwh#tasm 2#tasm#spider-man#spiderman x reader#spider-man x reader#mgparker#requests
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Poison Running Through My Veins | Part 1
Another Eddie Munson x reader fic! I'm sorry it took so long but I had no inspiration for ages and then BOOM all of the sudden and I'm like okay guess I'm writing until midnight.
And I'm introducing my other red flag of a man, Billy Hargrove. Yes. He's alive in this okay and no I don't care about canon right now.
Summary/ Idea: Eddie sees you in school parking lot being very close with your ex. Jealousy and angst ensues.
I swear this was supposed to be a fun little idea and it just ended up turning into this. Whatever this is.
Warnings: Eddie Munson x fem!reader, using she/her pronouns, no mention of Y/N, Billy Hargrove is alive, Steve Harrington being a parent and doing damage control, jealousy, angst, pain, tension, little bit of billy hargrove x reader, violent tempers, Eddie be angry and jealous, reference to a Losing Sight of You, argument, possessive!eddie, highly jealous!eddie, crying, so much fucking angst, lmk if I've forgotten any.
Sorry if any errors, I haven't proofread it yet but when I do, I'll edit it properly.
No minors allowed please and thank you.
Words: 3332
I think that's everything :)
Please do not repost anywhere, I will be posting this on my AO3 and putting link here.
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4
Eddie leaned against the side of his van, arms crossed and body slumped hard against the back door. He was trying his hardest not to stare, really, he was. He fidgeted with his rings. He shoved his hands in his pockets. Then crossed his arms. Looking up at the sky, looking to the rest of the parked cars in the school parking lot. He was trying to not stare.
But every time, his eyes would drag back to the same spot he had been staring at for over 15 minutes. His leg bounced as he crossed his arms again. Fighting the urge to draw attention to himself and smack his fist against the van, he shoved his hand into his back pocket to get a smoke. Cursing as his lighter refused to light. "Fucking come on you stupid piece of crap" he muttered, baring his teeth as he grimaced.
"Munson, you alright?"
He almost jumped out of his skin as Steve tapped his shoulder. Eddie swallowed his scream but mouthed 'Jesus H Christ' as he dropped the cigarette that was in his hand, reaching into his back pocket for another one. Eyes flickering back to their original location before, going back to successfully lighting his cigarette and taking a deep drag.
Steve looking at Eddie's obviously flustered state in pure confusion. "Seriously, what is up with you-" Steve followed Eddie's line of sight and let out a small "ah" before falling silent himself and putting his hands on his hips disapprovingly.
Robin coming up to the side of Steve and gagging at the smell of smoke. Then her eyes almost bulging out of her skull at the parking lot, "Holy shit! When did Billy Hargrove get out of hospital??" Instinctively she looked to Steve for answers, but when she was met with an uncomfortably loud silence, she paused.
"Long enough to be chatting up my girlfriend" Eddie spat, quickly finishing the cigarette he only lit a few minutes ago to then scrummage through his pocket for another. As soon as another one was in his hand, Robin snatched it out of his grip.
"Dude, he's not chatting her up. They just used to date" she shrugged unbothered and threw the cigarette away. Turning back to see Steve staring at her like 'why did you do that' and Eddie looking like he was torn between throwing up and killing a man.
"They used to date?!" he hissed, trying to lower his voice. He was aware that the parking lot was practically empty but still.
Steve massaged his temples, "Yeah before the Star Court Mall situation" Eddie grinded his teeth and raked his hand through his hair, wincing slightly at the pain. "Honestly though dude, you shoulda known. It was big news throughout the whole school, Dustin never told you?"
Eddie paused at that. Maybe Dustin did tell him, but he didn't listen because he didn't pay you any attention until the last year of high school. But he remembered one thing. You had definitely never brought it up. You never even mentioned Billy Hargrove. You just mentioned that you had dated someone else before Eddie and frankly, Eddie was delighted. He knew that whoever your ex had been it wasn't something you talked about much. Eddie took that as you didn't think there wasn't much to talk about. Which meant you didn't have any high expectations when it came to dating him. But you still hadn't ever brought up just who your ex was or how it had ended. And that was what was eating him up inside. Especially since he had to hear it from someone else.
He turned his attention back to you and him chatting. Honestly, he wasn't sure why he was getting so worked up over nothing. You were just chatting to him. Sure you had the brightest smile on your face when you had ran over to him, pausing in mid conversation to see a black car pull over in the school parking lot and a tall figure step out. You still had the same smile on your face when the figure had walked over to you, clearly in pain but pushing through. The same smile on your face when he returned it. The same smile when you looked to the ground as Billy winked at you, and Eddie knew you were blushing.
"Munson, you can't take Billy in a fight so don't even try it" Steve said stealing Eddie's concentration. Eddie knew it was in case you looked back and saw how upset he was. Maybe this was why you had never brought it up. He raised his eyebrow at Steve. "Trust me, I tried." Steve said shuddering as he remembered the fight that seemed like forever ago.
"She never brought him up with me" Eddie admitted. Looking at the sky, blinking quickly, running his hand through his hair again. In the however many months you two had been dating and a year of friendship beforehand, you hadn't brought it up once. Robin and Steve gave each other a look.
"It wasn't an easy relationship" Robin offered. She knew the things you had told her. But equally she couldn't let Eddie suffer like this. "She ended it and they stayed close friends" She bit her lip looking at Steve for help.
"How close?" Eddie growled as he watched you stand on your tip toe and lean into a hug with Billy fucking Hargrove. One of his hands on upper waist, lower back, the other is slightly higher up holding you firm against him and yours around his neck.
Energy and rage rattling around inside him, feeling like he was either gonna explode or faint. So, he channelled his rage and as confidently as he could, held himself tall and started walking over. Robin elbowing Steve to catch his attention and he whipped round and saw Eddie striding towards you two. Steve quickly caught u to him, practically running towards you, and clapped his hand on Eddie's back basically telling him to 'cool the fuck down'.
As they got closer Steve called out to you, "Yo man! When did you get out of hospital?" Hearing this, you quickly separated yourself from Billy. Billy didn't let go of you as quickly and let his hands linger on you for a little longer. Your heart did a weird somersault when you turned and saw Steve and Eddie walking towards you. Seeing Eddie's face, you knew it wasn't good, but you pushed those feelings down. As Billy's hand slid down your back, the small shiver that seeped through you, you know Eddie saw.
"You still fucking here Harrington?" Steve rolled his eyes. "And who are you?" Billy scoffed pulling a cigarette out from behind his ear. You inwardly sighed. You knew Billy was deliberately pissing off Eddie. You knew he knew who Eddie was.
Sending a small look to Billy you jumped in before Eddie could retort, "This is my boyfriend, Eddie Munson. You know the guy I told you about, he has a band" You smiled your brightest smile.
"Yeah Corroded Coffin, we play Metallica covers and original songs" Eddie said puffing out his chest a little. He was nothing compared to Billy, even though Billy had been in hospital for months and not near his workout gear for ages. You tentatively tried to stand near Eddie but doing so you ended up being closer to Billy. Not what you had intended.
Eddie slung his arm around you, heavy and tight and you almost toppled over at the sheer aggression of the action. Confused by Eddie's tough guy pretention, you completely missed the way Billy smirked and raised his eyebrows at Steve. Steve just looked like he wanted to really not be there. You glanced behind you seeing Robin with the rest of the kids. You could see there was a discussion going on but you couldn't obviously hear. You just knew it wasn't good with the way Max was looking at you four.
When you thought the testosterone levels were going to explode, the words ended up falling out of your mouth before you could stop them, "We have a gig on Friday, you could come if you wanted to...?" You hadn't meant it to sound like a question and you're not sure why you asked but you'd done it now.
"We? You in the band too?" Billy asked, curiousity twinkling in his eyes and the grip on your shoulder tightened.
"Yeah, the lead singer and Eddie's the guitarist" Steve said trying to quickly end the conversation. He noticed your wince in pain as Eddie's grip on you continued to tighten. Steve gave Eddie a look, but it appeared that Eddie ignored him.
"You're sleeping with the lead guitarist? You're moving up in the world, my girl" At the pet-name you froze and smiled awkwardly, not knowing what to do. Billy was grinning, knowing full well what an absolute shit he was being. Fucking bastard.
Eddie hadn't said a word, but he didn't have to from the way his entire body tensed.
Oh shit
"Anyways. We gotta be going, rehearsal and all that." Eddie said with a tight smile, pulling you away from Billy. You stumbled backwards slightly at the sudden movement and almost fell.
"It was nice seeing you Billy" you managed to say before being dragged away for good. Steve on the other side of you in case you accidentally fell over again.
"See you around doll" You heard Billy call after you. You saw Max walk past you as he yelled, "Oi shithead! Get in the car!" with less animosity than before the Star Court Mall fire but still not with much warmth either.
It was going to be an interesting drive home...
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The car ride home was silent. Not even turning on Metallica or Iron Maiden helped the situation. Eddie had ejected the tape and shoved it into his side door pocket mid-way through the song.
You had opened your mouth to speak but got shut down real quick, "Not now" was all Eddie said. His voice remained levelled and calm, which only scared you more.
It was only when he pulled up outside his trailer did you wish you could return to the silence.
"Billy Hargrove, huh" he started. It was phrased as a statement rather than a question, so you didn't answer. He turned to finally look at you and you could see the wildfire behind his eyes. You had never seen Eddie like this. You swallowed and slowly undid your seatbelt.
"When were you gonna tell me that your last ex-boyfriend was Billy fucking Hargrove? The biggest asshole that ever showed up to Hawkins High." Eddie locked the car doors as you tried to reach for the door handle. Oh no.
You didn't usually have big explosive fights. The last fight you had that was this big was when he had been keeping it a secret that he had been doing drug deals and meeting up with Chrissy Cunningham - when both of you knew full well, that he used to have a crush on her since middle school.
"You never asked" you shrugged your shoulders. You knew that wasn't the answer he was looking for, but it was the most straightforward one. Because it was the truth. He hadn't ever asked or pressed further about your past relationship.
"I had to find out from Steve and that was after you had run off to be all flirty with him"
That made your blood boil, "What is that supposed to mean? I wasn't being flirty, you idiot! I was happy that he was finally out of hospital. I was there at Star Court Mall too ya know!" Huffing you put your head in your hands. Completely shocked that you were even having this conversation right now.
"Oh yeah sure that's what we're calling it." He smacked the side of the driving wheel making you almost jump. Eddie talked with his hands, but he never hit things. You started feeling uneasy and trapped.
You ran your hands down your face and tried to keep yourself calm. You knew Eddie would let you out once he had calmed down a bit. You just had to get him there. "Oh my god what is going on? I love you - you absolute dumbass! I'm with you, I sleep with you, I practically almost live with you considering how much I come round to yours." You voice sounding strangled at the end. "Why are you so worked up about this?"
Looking at him exasperated you could see his eyes still blazing with unquenched fire.
Then it dawned on you.
"Are you jealous?" You looked at him as you waited for a response. When none came and he looked down at the steering wheel biting his lip, you gasped. "You are jealous! Is this what this is all about?" You relaxed into your chair your mind going hazy with both disbelief and shock. "So, cards on the table. You go and sneak off with your middle school crush for weeks on end, during which you avoid me, and I have to find you and confront you about it. But on the other hand, I'm just talking to my ex-boyfriend in a friendly way, and you fly off the handle after not even 20 minutes?!"
You waited for his response. When none came you clicked the air in front of his face annoyed. "Hello? Got nothing to say? What, did you lose your argument when you realised that you got nothing to be angry about?"
When he just looked at you, you just sunk back down into your chair. Arms crossed, annoyed and exasperated that your boyfriend was even angry about this in the first place. Gently rubbing your thumb over the part of your shoulder he had been gripping tightly during your encounter with Billy, you bit the inside of your cheek. You weren't sure what on earth you had to do to prove to Eddie that you weren't going anywhere and that he shouldn't be jealous. But from his expression and the way anger was still flowing through him, you knew your words would fall on deaf ears.
"Let me out of the car Eddie" you said. Feeling claustrophobic in the car with all this anger and negativity swirling around in front of you, you needed to in the fresh air.
"Not until you promise me you won't see him again" Eddie breathed out, staring ahead of him at the trailer door.
You looked at him thinking that he was joking. But the look on his face said that he was definitely not. Still, "you're kidding" you scoffed. He couldn't be serious. Eddie had never been like this with anyone else. He was jealous of Steve, you knew that, especially at the beginning of the relationship. But he had never said that you couldn't see him. This was ridiculous.
"Promise me" Eddie responded in a monotone voice. He still wasn't looking at you.
"Eddie, you're scaring me. Please let me out of the car" you tried again. A tremor of fear ran up your spine and you saw Eddie finally look at you. The fire behind his eyes was gone but the poison that had inflicted him with this jealousy. The poison was still there. His pupil massive, like he was on something. You could see it in the way he stared at you expressionless. Your heart rate quickening.
You've never known Eddie to be scary like this. This kind of possessiveness reminded you of home and the flashback memories started coming to the front of your mind. Your hand fumbled as you tried frantically to jiggle the door handle, but it was still locked.
Eddie grabbed your wrist and pulled you towards him, "Am I your replacement for him? What, we both listen to heavy rock and know about the Upside Down so you think 'yeah I can replace him with another fucking weirdo'? Were you planning on leaving me as soon as he got better?" As you shook your head repeatedly, his grip on your wrist tightened, "Now, promise me" he said each word slowly. Over punctuating each syllable.
"Eddie, please." your voice trembled with fear and pain. Where he was holding you on your wrist was aching and you could see your hand turning blue with lack of blood circulation.
You saw something flash behind his eyes and all of a sudden, his pupils returned back to regular size, and he let go of you. He unlocked the doors and stayed sat inside the car before jumping out and slamming his door shut. You shrunk back at the noise, your body taught with fear and caressing the purple bruise forming around your wrist from how tightly Eddie had been holding you.
You slowly got out of the car, legs wobbling slightly. Closing the door slowly, you leaned against the cool metal of the van. Breathing deeply, you sighed at the fight that had just unfolded. Your head was swimming with thoughts. Why was Eddie so jealous of Billy? Was he this jealous of Steve when he was first introduced to the gang? None of what he said he meant right? You could provide no answers to the questions swirling inside your mind. But you heard footsteps, so you straightened up, ready in case Eddie wanted a round 2.
You felt yourself be pulled into a gentle hug. Your nose breathing in his scent slowly. Still trying to keep your breathing steady so that you didn't start crying. "I'm so sorry for how I was with you then. I just got so angry" Your face buried into his hair so you could barely hear what he was saying over the sound of your mind and your heartbeat. "My dad used to lose his temper like that with me, I guess I lived up to the Munson name." You knew he was trying to apologise and make a joke out of it, but it felt like he was excusing his behaviour to genetics. You made a small 'hmm' noise in response and the hug became slightly tighter
You pulled away first. "I'm gonna go home. I need to be on my own for a bit" you murmured. Refusing to look him in the eye, because you were still terrified, you'd see the poison still there and also because you knew if you looked at him, you would definitely lose all control of your emotions and weep.
"I'll call you?" He offered. You simply nodded. Your vocal cords tired after the short but explosive fight. He'd let you walk to your trailer across the trailer park by yourself. He knew he had overstepped the line and he knew that you needed space. He sighed. "I've really fucked this up" he pinched the bridge of his nose and walk walked into his trailer when you began walking away.
As you made your way passed Max's trailer you stopped to pet one of your neighbours' dogs. The silly good boy wagged his tail and whined, putting his paw up against the fence. "I'm fine, I promise" you managed a small smile when you reached through the fence to scratch his ears. A couple of small tears escaped through the quick blinking of your eyes. You used your other hand to wipe them away, pausing when you saw the bruise on your wrist develop fully.
The doggy whined and sniffed at your hand before licking your fingers softly. "Thanks for making me feel a bit better" you let out a soft laugh at the feeling. "You're a good boy" you said, and the doggy woofed in response, clearly pleased.
"And here's me thinking you'd only call me that"
You turned around too quickly, almost losing your footing, but a large hand caught you by the waist in time. You recognised the voice and the hand simultaneously.
"Hi billy"
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if you liked this please like, comment, follow and reblog for more. This is going to end up being more chapters because I have so many ideas of where I want this to go. Hope you enjoyed!
#eddie munson#eddie munson x reader#billy hargrove#steve harrington#robin buckley#eddie stranger things#stranger things#stranger things s4#fanfiction#eddie munson fanfic#eddie munson x you#angst#because i cant help myself#just reblog#stranger things fanfiction#billy hargove is alive#dont fuck with me and my red flags#i got a certain taste in men okay#jealousy#tension in the relationsip#oh boi#Chrissy Cunningham#a dog makes everything better
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