#says the boy who spent most of today “taking naps”

[himbos-hotline]

Late Night Thursday Box time

she looks so sleepy and valid

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 407: Wait Why Are You Running Away

Previously on BnHA: Kacchan figured out how to control his quirk upgrade and was totally chill and normal about it. Definitely not terrifying at all. He actually spent the entire chapter smiling and laughing like the wholesome little boy he is. I don’t know why Kid For One is so freaked out about it. He even politely introduced himself using his childhood nickname. Clearly he just wants to be friends with you, KFO!

Today on BnHA: Horikoshi is all “sorry to keep you waiting, here’s the AFO and Yoichi flashback you ordered at long last” and proceeds to serve a nightmarish stew of HUMAN MISERY and RATS and STABBING and CARNAGE and SO MUCH MURDER and THE SINGLE MOST FUCKED-UP CASE OF CODEPENDENCY ANYONE HAS EVER WRITTEN. I was not even remotely prepared for any of this, and if anyone else claims that they were, I will call you a liar to your face. If this chapter had a mouth it would scream. Or just sob, ceaselessly and uncontrollably. I’m really glad Horikoshi is on break next week because that man needs to take a fucking nap. My god.

okay WOW

anyone else read the first two words and just immediately say to themselves, “oh okay, so it’s gonna be one of those chapters”? I mean, I guess we were due for a darker chapter after last week’s Kacchan Comedy Tour. but idk, I just wasn’t expecting “homeless sick prostitute with a drinking problem” levels of dark

AND SHE’S PREGNANT?!

what exactly is this manga rated again? doesn’t this backstory seem just a little bit raw for the impressionable kiddos??

has anyone actually checked in on Horikoshi recently? you know, just to make sure he is okay??

what a fun and wholesome manga this is

the lil baby arm covered in blood with the AFO hole on the palm. lying next to the dead mom hand. what an image to sear into our minds. I guess it’s been a while since he killed any dogs. gotta keep us on our toes somehow

also wasn’t expecting AFO and Yoichi to be twins! that puts an interesting spin on their relationship, because it’s usually a closer bond than even regular siblings. especially with all of that delightful shared trauma from a young age!!

yes, exactly

ohhhh this chapter is gonna hurt me, isn’t it. okay. ooooooookay. let’s do this

OH I’M SORRY, THERE’S MORE?!

Horikoshi my dude. you do realize that their mom dying in childbirth and the two of them just barely surviving and growing up as street orphans would have already been MORE than tragic enough, backstory-wise. you did not have to turn this into a freaking horror show with RATS TRYING TO EAT THEIR NEWBORN SELVES jesus christ

and THAT’S where you chose to put a one year timeskip?!

what the fuck am I reading here, you guys. no please tell me, I am actually desperate to understand

so the narrator is saying that some of the quirks manifested later in life, in “pubescent and pre-pubescent stages”, which is interesting because it’s the first time I can recall hearing about someone actually manifesting a quirk that late. maybe Deku’s old OFA cover story was more plausible than I realized

anyway so eventually it occurred to everyone that they should maybe freaking study this shit, idk. and eventually the researchers concluded that the superpowers came from a new gene that apparently isn’t human. and upon hearing that, society apparently lost its freaking mind. which is fascinating to me because it implies that the turning point wasn’t actually the superpowers themselves, but the realization of what it meant

like, so they were apparently fine with it when they thought it was a “mysterious disease”, but somehow it hit different when they learned it wasn’t actually a sickness at all, but instead the Next Step in Evolution. and it became an “us vs them” thing, as opposed to a “we have to cure these poor people” thing. damn

anyway so now Japan is a dystopia and we’re cutting to a big crowd of merc-looking dudes who are getting ready to attack some “meta freaks”, how lovely

but who is this figure in the shadows

I ask politely, as if it wasn’t already beyond obvious that this is AFO about to wreck some people’s shit

ohhhhh my god lmao

hopefully Katsuki and Deku can take the present day AFO out before he winds up looking like this. because this little fella is clearly demonic and idk if anyone can stop him

you all don’t understand. you need to run the fuck away right now

oh shit it’s already too late for them

it’s too late for any of us. it’s over. it’s all fucking over

((((；゜Д゜)))

AFO I am putting the manga down. I am backing away slowly with my hands in the air. I mean you no harm. please for the love of god have mercy

holy

“you see, we told you he wasn’t human” okay Scientific Research Group, you know what?? you win this round I guess

“HE WAS LITERALLY EVIL FROM BIRTH” HORIKOSHI SERIOUSLY ARE YOU OKAY??

HE WAS BORN AN ARROGANT BABY is literally the most terrifying sentence I have ever read

what the entire fuck

it’s a gorgeous sunny mid-November afternoon outside my window. but no matter how hard it tries, the light cannot reach this place

what kind of moron would throw a can of soda at him. officially the stupidest person we have ever seen in this manga

OH MY GOD OF COURSE IT’S HIM LMAO

(ETA: how come baby Yoichi has clothes that fit him perfectly but baby AFO is just stomping around wearing a tablecloth.)

BABY YOICHI. OH MY GOD. HOW THE HELL DID YOU GROW UP TO BE SANE AND KIND AND GOOD. THAT’S MY QUESTION THAT I NEED ANSWERED RIGHT NOW. YOU ARE LITERALLY A MIRACLE. YOU ARE AN IMPOSSIBILITY, DO YOU KNOW THAT

small and weak, but also so, so cute. all of the cuteness genes went straight to him. no wonder AFO was jealous

(ETA: just want to press pause for a second to speculate about what type of twins AFO and Yoichi are, since it has some relevance to the story, and especially to the OFA/AFO quirk lore. so! at first glance the two of them would appear to be fraternal twins, just based on the fact that they have very different appearances, and also the fact that Yoichi doesn’t have the AFO quirk – no holes in his hands, etc. identical twins are born from the same fertilized egg, so in theory they would both have the same sequence of DNA, which means Yoichi would have had the same quirk as AFO. but that doesn’t appear to be the case. so all of that points to them being fraternal, not identical.

on the other hand, there is one piece of evidence in this chapter that does support them being identical twins, and that’s the fact that per the narration, AFO absorbed most of the nutrients from their mother. a few minutes of google fu informed me that this condition is relatively rare, and only happens in cases where two twins share a placenta, which typically is only the case for identical twins. HOWEVER, for what it’s worth, there have also been rare instances where two fraternal twin placentas fuse together and become a single placenta. AND this apparently also increases the chances of one of the twins gaining more of the nutrients and causing the other twin to have a lower birth weight.

so based on the evidence here, my conclusion is that the two of them are most likely fraternal twins with a case of placental fusion. besides, you can’t tell me that stealing his baby brother’s placenta while the two of them are literally still in the womb doesn’t sound like exactly the type of BS that fetus!AFO would pull, lol.)

HEY!?!

okay?!?!?! well to be fair he did throw that soda at him

oh my god this is so fucked up. in like the best and worst way possible

I genuinely couldn’t ask for a better AFO backstory. it’s so incredibly twisted, and you actually do feel sorry for him. or at least I do. but it’s also beyond clear that this kid was FUCKED UP BEYOND ALL REASON right from the get go. zero goodness in him. literally doesn’t see other people as people. sees them as possessions only. things to rule over. not other thinking, feeling human beings. and that includes his own little brother

but. even if it’s not actually what I would call love, there’s still... attachment, there. it’s the closest he can get to actually caring about someone. guh. just, somehow they have both managed to humanize him, and at the same time made him less human than ever. this manga, man. this fucking manga, though

lmao and here we go. Captain Hero

you know, all those times that I made fun of AFO for not knowing how to read, I never suspected that the twist in his backstory would be that he LITERALLY DIDN’T KNOW HOW TO READ dfksjdlfkjslkdf

but seriously though. because Yoichi appears to be self-taught, and I can’t see AFO having the patience for that, and CLEARLY no one else was around to teach him, sooooo...

oh my goodness it’s actually getting wholesome up in here

what a good fucking boy. poor AFO. fuck me, I can’t help it. it’s not your fault you’re the world’s greatest monster you poor bastard

now we’re cutting to THREE YEARS LATER. okay

is he going to declare war on the glowing baby

typical teenager concerned about nothing but likes and view counts. AFO you would be so much happier if you stopped worrying about all of that and just focused on your own growth

oh, lol. well that was quick

(ETA: r.i.p. Damien.)

“this guy had more instagram followers than me. so I killed him” honey. sweetie pie. you need therapy

omfg

all this time I was wondering who AFO’s middle school lit teacher was who had failed so spectacularly at teaching him reading comprehension. and it was YOICHI ALL ALONG. omg

“and, presumably, that’s how it always was and always will be.” dude. can you imagine listening to AFO’s oral book report on A Tale of Two Cities. “ahem. it was the Best of Times. the end” buddy noooooooo

it was at that moment when Yoichi knew, etc. etc.

oh my GOD I scrolled down to the next panel right after this one and I just IMMEDIATELY DIED LAUGHING

“WAS IT SOMETHING I SAID” ffffffffffffffff I fucking can’t omfg

NOW THIS HUSSY IS STEALING HIS BROTHER AWAY FROM HIM NOOOOOOO

HE’S HIS!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!!! THAT’S NOT ALLOWED!!!

oh my god the hands. so wait, is this just the standard symbolic BnHA handholding, or are there More Levels To This. when exactly did Yoichi pass OFA on to Kudou. like is that why the sudden close-up and all that? omg

WHAT!!!!

OH THAT’S THE END, HUH? THAT’S THE END RIGHT THERE, AND THAT’S JUST HOW IT IS. I SEE. OKAY THEN. EXCUSE ME WHILE I PUT MY LAPTOP DOWN AND GO INTO THE NEXT ROOM AND SCREAM INTO A PILLOW

oh my god. and break next week too. this is what you guys have been dealing with this entire time huh. I understand your feelings now. godfuckingdammit lmao

[gallaghersgal]

Hi there! How are we doing on this fine sunday? I spent the day at the beach and of course, that gave me some ideas so ahem ahem ✨beach day with carmy bear✨

First let’s talk about the most obvious thing ever but…this man looks HAWT okay?!!? He already does on a daily basis, doing the most regular things ever but at the beach????? 74 dead, 192 injured.

anyway yeah he looks really good but also:

You manage to whisk him away for a few days, just the two of you to relax and you rent a small house by the beach. Your goal is basically to get him to slow down a bit, catch up on some sleep and have fun, you know?That in itself is tough because he!!cannot!!relax!!!!!!!!! But he’s also very very in love so he agrees for a weekend away.

He carries all the bags because he was raised a gentleman and there’s no way you lift one pretty finger of yours k?

You insist on putting sunscreen on his back and face and okay maybe it’s just an excuse to give him a nice massage and maybe he knows that but plays along too

But he’s just as protective, always making sure you’re hydrated and you’re wearing your hat if you’re seating in the sun.

i might be almost 21 but playing in the waves!!!!!! and making sand castles!!!!! at first he might think it’s a little silly but not in a mean way, just the kind of thing he doesn’t think of to have fun because he just doesn’t have fun yk? but he helps you and realizes it is actually fun. it definitely turns into a competition btw and you end up both winning and eating ice cream as a reward.

Playing cards too!! i feel like he knows one or two great cars games that he’d teach you, something he got from Mickey or Cousin maybe?

also napping on the beach. he lays his head on your belly while you read and you’re playing with his hair and the weather is nice and it’s actually pretty good to feel the sun on his skin and—when you notice he’s sleeping, you don’t move, just let him take whatever he needs.

you 100% make sure to take a billion pictures of him, of the two of you (you send one of him sleeping to nat <3) and he tries to take aesthetic pictures of you, he snaps a few more just to keep for himself.

a lot of talking too!!! he’s been working a lot, you too, life got in the way so you take the time to catch up—you tell him about the new show you want to start with him, he tells you about a flea market he’d like to check out. It feels nice to catch up and somehow it reassures him? Like his anxiety gets too much and he’s scared you might be unhappy but then you talk and you tell him you love him and you want to do things with him and his chest feels less heavy.

who says day at the beach, says watching the sunset together. of course it’s beautiful but carmy keeps looking at you and the way the light seems to hit your features so perfectly well because he’s a sap.

You get a little cold and he’s instantly handing you his sweater. And I just know his heart melts when you nuzzle closer to him <3

I love to think he’d stay up at night to listen to the ocean. He can’t sleep because his mind is too loud so he goes on the little patio and listens to the sounds of the waves on the shore. Maybe you join him, rest your head on his shoulder and enjoy the moment with him. he hasn’t felt this happy in a long time.

-🧸

hey so something you don't know about me is that i love the beach more than literally any other place on earth!!!!! i went to the OBX a lot as a kid and it shaped me into the woman i am today!!!!! i love the beach!!!!!!!!!!!! i even had a finnpoe beach au that was like. god. it was at minimum 10k words and it wasn't even complete yet. i would just work on it when at the beach house my father took me to cause there was no wifi there- but enough ab me!!!!!

i agree that baby boy canNOT relax, poor thing. but you could talk him into it saying he can try all kinds of new restaurants and get some ideas for a seafood course for the bear menu <33 and ughhh i just. staying in a cutie little beach house with him!!! i used to go to the beach every year and when i got old enough to really appreciate the whole day, my fav thing became evening walks and i know those would sooth his soul sooo much

"there’s no way you lift one pretty finger of yours k?" i will sob??? i will actually cry and scream and roll around on the floor???? god i just. carmen carrying your bags upstairs to the house while you take stock of all the general beach things available in the shed underneath. yall know how beach houses are on stilts? yeah like that. and placing your shampoo and body wash and things in the outdoor shower so it can be used first thing, because once everything is unloaded all you wanna do is walk down to the ocean and once you're there, well, who isn't gonna jump in!

massaging the sunscreen into his back, the way he would sigh a little, and you can press soft kisses to his cheek as you do so. ugh i looveeeee him!!!! he would be so so protective, making sure there's plenty of snacks, and if you're hungry he'll walk the beach with you until you find a little sandwich shop or taco place for whatever you wanna eat. he's confused at first why you're making a sand castle, preferring to sit and read his book, but suddenly he's finished with a chapter and spending time with his girl seems so much more fun, so before he knows it he's packing wet sand into the mould sitting across from you, sandy shins and messy hair, but he's all smiley too

the poor thing would get so exhausted from playing in the waves, probably bc he's not used to it. swimming in the ocean really takes it out of you!! so when you're laid out under the umbrella reading he grumbles like "babe, lemme... c'mere," and tugs you just a little closer to rest his head on your tummy :((( playing with his curls while they dry from the salt water, forming them into perfect little spirals, putting a little braid here and there

just talking to each other and catching up in such a relaxed setting is so sweet im gonna sob. maybe y'all snagged a beachfront place so you can watch the sun set over the water ((i have never seen this... #eastcoast)) while you're sitting on the rlly comfy deck chairs, he's got a beer and you've got a little cocktail he made you, and you're playing cards and chatting about what's been going on lately. just sitting out there together listening to the waves, wrapped up in his sweater from his culinary school i- i genuinely cannot. i love him and i love the beach. I LOVE HIM AND I LOVE THE BEACH!!!!!!!

tldr; me and 🧸 love the beach and carmy so much

[sphireath-wisp]

#Lovesick

Sypnosis: Looks like someone got sick. Who else would be there other than your lover? Boyfriend duty calls <3

Warnings: Might be mischaracterization? Not proofread, messy interchanging tenses

Featuring: Nagi Seishiro, Meguru Bachira, Yoichi Isagi x GN! reader

Nagi Seishiro

You don't even have a different routine when you're sick. With his big build and strong body, you are literally trapped in his embrace in bed. He absolutely loves having you around and being sick is too perfect of an excuse to stay home all day!!

Naturally, though, he's worried. Nagi likes it when you bury your face into his neck, but the alarming temperature of your flushed face and how ragged your breathing sounds when you rest your chin on his shoulder make him pause his games to check up on you.

Nagi wants to see you get well soon of course, but that means you'll have to go do work and he can't see you :((

He shares his food with you, this boy is definitely a firm believer that eating more means faster recovery.

Oh boy, his game was totally off when he was practicing with Isagi, Bachira, and Reo. When I tell you that he couldn't concentrate, I mean it. Occasionally, Nagi would glance over to where you usually sat to cheer him on and feel his stomach drop a little deeper whenever he remembers the current state you're in.

He's taking extra naps with you whenever you're sick, sticking to you like glue despite your insistence on how he would catch your cold too. Nagi is always pouting and whining, complaining about the lack of kisses and reminiscing about the times you shower him with so much attention. "I only found out I was sick today Nagi. Plus, I'm sick..."

When you finally recover, he feels relieved. Nagi missed hearing you enthusiastically shout his name whenever he scored a goal, missed your comforting hugs, and missed going out to get food together at ungodly hours.

Though, you got busier since no one did your work while you were sick so you still didn't show up to his practices.

Meguru Bachira

He knew something was wrong the moment he saw Isagi bursting into his room dragging him out of bed. Usually, his beloved alarm clock - you - would be up and raring by now and shaking him awake. You were so excited about his match today too.

Isagi said to him, "(Name) texted me saying they caught a cold and didn't want you to catch it, they're probably at their apartment by now."

His Instagram story is flooded with complaints, insisting on how his game is off because his good luck charm isn't with him </3

Bachira asks his mom for that chicken soup recipe she would make him whenever he was sick so that he could replicate it for you. This guy is another firm believer that the more good food in your system, the faster you'll recover. You're sort of worried if letting him in your kitchen was a good idea.

Honestly speaking, he isn't EXTREMELY worried about you. Being optimistic, he's sure you'll make a speedy recovery in no time at all. Of course, he's calling you constantly during practice to check up on you. Bachira face-times you so you can see him score and see your oh-so-stunning face. (not so stunning with that pile of tissues next to you)

"I miss (Name)," He'll feign a sob and dramatically fall to his knees as Chigiri.

In actuality, despite the act, once he gets home, the loneliness begins to hit him. Usually, his free time is spent practicing or sleeping. You were usually a soothing remedy for his loneliness and boredom, but now that you're sick, he misses you more than ever.

How does he describe it? Something like how your heart aches when a family member is leaving for another country or homesickness? It's not quite that, but it doesn't feel right without you.

Once you've recovered, you begin to notice how Bachira is clingier than usual. He's linked to you by the hip at most times if not all. Elation - the perfect word to describe how he felt to see you well again.

Isagi Yoichi

The classic, perfect boyfriend. He noticed how you began coughing more during your usual nighttime stroll with him and brought you back to his place.

100% the type to feed you food and leave a hot towel on your head, assures you constantly that all of your work will be settled if you insist that you need to do something, refills your water bottle, and ensures you stay hydrated.

Isagi is sure you'll go through a fast recovery if you rest like you intended to. Just in case though, he'll tell you to call him if you ever need anything. I will bet everything on how he has a special ringtone set for whenever you call him or text him.

His team will send you pictures of that cheesy smile plastered on his face whenever he calls or texts you. Honestly, you have a whole album on your phone dedicated purely to pictures of him grinning at his phone.

His game isn't really that bad since he'll get fired up quite quickly. Though, he isn't used to not receiving sweets or kisses after practice.

Just like Bachira, he'll face-time you a lot. Hearing your voice, seeing your face, and smile, asking you if you've been feeling better ever since you got sick, it sort of reassures him.

Sometimes, he wonders if he's doing enough to help you recover and always asks if you need anything from him.

ISAGI WILL GIVE YOU FOREHEAD KISSES ROUTINELY!! SICK OR NOT, HE MUST AND WILL!! It's what keeps you and him asleep at night.

Isagi definitely breathes a sigh of relief the moment you say that you've fully recovered. On your birthday, he'll wish you good health and all of that sappy stuff so you won't have to feel so miserable being sick.

[thatcanadianfangirl]

JJ Maybank// Healing Takes Time pt.3

JJ Maybank X Jade (Booker) Routledge OC

Plot: Jade has a ✨feminine energy✨day with Sarah and Kiara.

Word count: 2.7k+

Content: brother’s best friend, slow burn, underage drinking, foul language.

Disclaimer: the 3rd and final part of healing takes time, it’s not finished but I a year and a half ago and won’t be completing. I really enjoyed writing this but it’s not something I want to continue. I didn’t edited or anything kinda just want this out of my drafts.

{Part One} {Part Two}

———-

Someone laying on the horn in the dirt drive way of the Chateau knocked the relaxation out of my bones. The water lapped at my legs hanging over the dock, my shoulder blades were resting on the rotting wood. I was soaking up the sun cascading over my body and trying to enjoy my workless weekend.

Two car doors slammed shut in the distant and I instantly knew that it wasn't the Twinkie, it had sounds that I associated with home. Soft feminine voices were mumbling and a small smile creeped onto my face.

Sitting up I gathered my worn sneakers, hooking them with one finger each on the same hand. The HMS Pogue danced with the small waves caused by other boats that have passed. Walking up the long L shaped dock water dripped down my calves and imprinted my path onto the wood for thirty minutes.

feet partially dry I managed to shout a mangled greeting as I struggled to slip on my socks. Fumbling with forcing my shoes on, a little too excited to spent the day with them. I hopped off the dock landing wrong. I grained my balance back right before I could knock my teeth out from a brutal wipe out.

"Woah take it easy, Routledge!" Sarah chuckles walking towards me with Kie at her side.

"I don't know what came over me, My body just took over." I say a little sheepish.

It was an overpowering feeling of having female friends, almost like I didn't know what to do with myself. God was it absolutely embarrassing. I always had my brother and he was, most of the time, a good fill in to indulge into girl talk. Although their were some conversations I needed to only share with female friends.

Of course I had acquaintances at Kildare high. They were fun conversations in-between classes to fill in the time, or light gossiping at the boneyard, whenever Kiara pulled me along and she was caught with the boys. they weren't ones I hangout on my own time, it felt like a lot of effort to contain any relationship outside of home and work.

The least I could say was I am starved for female companionship. When Sarah asked us a week ago to go hangout I was ecstatic. The excitement started to stack before I realized and it tipped over causing me to just about snap my ankle in two.

"Honesty. I might be a little euphoric myself." Kiara says, and it stabilized my embarrassment,

"Over here too." Sarah pipes up.

"The aura all three of them bring feels so suffocating at times. I need this day you." She says with mock desperation and lightheartedness dancing in her tone.

"Tell me about it, I have a brother who reeks of that shit," I say with a mouth full of sass, they smile wide holding back fits of laughter.

"I don't mind it." Sarah says with a shrug.

"Absolutely disgusting." I mimic throwing up my bagel and coffee from earlier. "You say that because you haven't lived with the demon for a decade and a half."

"It'll get old fast." Kie says,

"damn right!" I agree enjoying this moment I was sharing with them. Surprised by how easy I fell into conversation with them. Like this was an everyday occurrence, I never wanted this feeling to escape from my fingertips.

"Are you ready?" Sarah questions racking over my attire. I was wearing very worn in short, a blue top and one of John's loose button shirts. It's very beach casual it wasn't too fashion friendly but it wasn't the worst thing I could've worn today.

"Yeah, I'm just going to give John a heads up." I say beginning to approach the house and finding him having a massive cat nap on the porch couch.

Stepping on the porch I slammed the screen door shut, but the bang only managed to halt his loud snored for three seconds. I rolled my eyes knowing this wake up job would take a little work. His entire body stretched along the sofa, his height so tall, the toes of his shoes hung over the arm rest.

One tap against his torn sneaker, "John." My voice holding a vociferous tone in attempt to wake him. But only backfired forcing his snores to become more prominent and stir in his sleep.

what on god's deteriorating earth did this kid do last night to cause him to sleep way into the afternoon? I heard him clamber through the house at three am. very late but at least he made the effort to come home.

"John B!" I hollered right over him.

His body jerked awake and his face held alarm as he sprung to life almost knocking me on my ass in the process. John wiped at his face regaining consciousness. Soon his brown eyes fell into recognition at the sight of me crossing my arms over my chest and eyeing him down with and unamused expression.

"What the Hell is wrong with you, Jade." He said bitterly and aggressively combed his hair back.

"Good Morning to you too sleepy head." I cooed at him as if he were a small child who didn't get what they wanted.

"You're so goddamn annoying." He seethes through his teeth.

"Someone is a little cranky." I mock a pout.

"Why the fuck did you wake me?" He growled grumpily into his palms and I smirk cockily at my suffering brother.

I shrug, "Just wanted to let you know I'm leaving to hang with Kiara and Sarah." I said pointing my thumb over my shoulder. He leans over looking past me and at the two girls resting against the hood of Sarah's SUV. "Hey John B," They snicker in unison.

"Hey." He replied with a rough sleepy voice.

"You're actually hangout with them?" There was a hint of eager happiness wrapped in his tone. I brushed it off and began began battling with the smile that tried to crawl to the surface.

"Me and Kie are alright friends. Sarah just fits in perfectly. And if I'm being honest I need female friends. So I hope you don't mind me stealing yours." I say smugly knowing I'd still hangout with them even if he was fully against it.

"I don't mind one bit." Me says with an ear splitting grin.

"Also I did want to talk to you later." I say not feeling like it was the right time to be bringing it up. Was there ever a right time for it?

"Sure. Anything."

"It's nothing too tremendous." I muster up.

I hope it wasn't because I knew this treasure hunting obsession has gone a little over the edge. I need John to lift the weight off my shoulders a bit. Allow me to breathe and maybe set some money a side for a rainy day. Who Knew how he'd take it, I just have to show him just how desperate I was to have my brother back.

"Okay." he jokes as if I wasn't going to give him an ultimatum.

---

The Surf Shack is an adorable little boutique located in the middle of the island. it wasn't marked as Figure 8 and nor was it part of The Cut. It was centered ground and probably the reason why it's Kie's favourite shop in all of Kildare.

Brand new surf boards lined the back wall, bathing suits towards the left wall and summer clothing to the right. Various string and bulky beaded jewelry Koisks scattered the floor. The theme of the store held a beachy ambiance, it was very soothing and felt familiar.

"What's the colour pallet?" Sarah ask slinging her arm over my shoulder and leaning against me, I become flustered at the close proximity not expecting her to clung on to me like she did.

"Uh.." I stated not really understand the premise of the question.

"Jade it more of a teal or a purple type of person," Kie says after lightly analyzing me and I begin to feel self conscious around them.

Sarah looks at me as if waiting for me to disagree. In all honest I've never had to luxury to pick the colour of my clothing. I purchased whatever fit me and looked at least half decent. So I'm not particularly familiar with my colour pallet.

"I think Kie is right." I pretend like I knew exactly what she meant, but from the look swirling in Sarah's eyes, I knew I failed miserably. I felt absolutely pathetic and began to interrogate my decision to come here with them.

"Lets just take a look around and have a feel for it." Kie says covering up the feeling of awkwardness that started to wedge its self between us.

"Sounds like a good idea." I say relieved, taking myself out of Sarah's grasp and going towards peach-coloured pieces. It didn't take long to find out the price of a single bikini top was far out of my budget. The white tag in my hand from a lime green basic triangle top read $68.

Who in there right mind would pay that much for nipple covers? was this what is was like to not live from pay cheque to pay cheque? because please sign me the fuck up, pronto. God I wonder what it would be like to no look at the price and know I could afford a lousy bikini set.

Looking around I saw Kie and Sarah in different isles sorting through the various styles and colours. I must've been looking like a lost freaking puppy for too long because one of the employees, Henley, walks up to me with a polite smile. She's tall and has perfect blonde hair flowing down her back. Henley definitely was a freaking goddess in her past life, I could tell you that much.

"Is there anything I could help you with?" She says with a mega watt smile, and I gulp nervously hoping she didn't think I was going to tuck this top into my back pocket. I'm not going to lie, it was pretty tempting now that I think about it.

"No, I'm just looking. Thank you for the offer." I say bringing my customer service to life like I knew exactly what I was doing. Caging up the nerves in the process. I could feel the eyes of the Pogues dart to me and I wanted to melted into the floor at the questioning looks.

"Are you sure? Because it looks like you're struggling." She presses and god was it fucking embarrassing. Was it really that hard for her to leave me to my thoughts?

"Hey, Henley, could you help me find a size?" Kie calls,

"Yes of course." She replies instantly. "Will you excuse me?"

"Not a problem." I give her a tight smile. I felt every one of my muscles relax at her retreating back. I could literally kiss the girl for calling the demon off of my spine. Sometimes Kie was an expert at reading my body language and rescued me with a fucking life raft, a good percentage of the time.

I shoved the green top onto the rack again and navigated my way to the clearance section. It crumbled the little ego I had left but it was my own doing for not seeking it out in the first place. I just wanted to feel normal for once and experience something other than The Cut.

The section was more budget friendly but it was less size inclusive. being in this place was like bringing a skate board to the beach. Not the smartest idea but I could make the best of it.

I could feel Sarah come behind me and lay her chin onto my shoulder browsing my selection with me. I oddly enjoyed how touch affection she is, almost like a nice surprise after a tough day.

"I know you probably don't want to hear this, but I could get you one you'll actually like. You've been scouring the rack for five minutes, I can see nothing is catching your eye. It's not a big deal. Think of it as a an early birthday gift."

I can't muster up the words I want to say, because how exactly do I respond to that? Sarah is one of the kindest people I know and I cant possible take advantage of her for a new swimsuit I don't need.

"I appreciate it. Sarah I really do, But I cant ask that." I say in a hushed tone knowing Henley is always keeping an eye on me at all times as she works around the store.

"You're not asking. I'm offering. There's a difference between the two. I've seen how hard you've worked to keep the Chateau alive. You deserve to enjoy something new once in awhile. You're not being selfish, Okay?"

Her tone is soft as she speaks into my ear and I couldn't help the hot tears from sliding down my cheeks. Sarah saw me and still wanted to be here, I felt every emotion I could and they hit me like a semi truck.

Kie had a sixth sense and soon was glued to my hip. Sarah filled her in, as I bite down on my bottom lip forcing the blubbering cries that wanted to escape, at bay.

'Oh Honey." Kie coos fondly and wipes a few tears away but they're soon replaced by fresh ones. "Here." Sarah hands me the keys to her SUV. "Why don't you sit in the car and we'll pick something out of you?" Her voice is sugar and I didn't want to leave her side. But if I didn't leave soon I know it wouldn't take much to have everything in me spilled out.

With a weak nod I mange to take the keys into my grasp almost dropping them at the unexpected weight. I'm a mess and everyone in this place was seeing it first hand. There was no way I would live this down. Hell would freeze over before I ever thought of returning to this shop. That pushy employee, Henley, would recognize me as the one girl from The Cut who broke down in the middle of this god forsaken place.

It felt like the walk of shame as I approached the exit and onto the side walk. With one click on the car fob Sarah's vehicle beeped and flashed as it unlocked. If I didn't have the keys in my hand someone would accuse me of stealing it.

Once I clambered into the backseat I slumped against the leather bench and sobbed into it. everything I was feeling over the last few days had finally rushed out of me in an earthshattering wailing.

---

I wake up disoriented. I'm still wearing day clothes but the moon light from my window is glowing onto my skin. I'm confused and well rested, that was the best fucking sleep I've had in ages. Everything from earlier smashes into my brain like a stone wall, the reason of the best cat nap of my life.

Pent up emotion from John B trying to keep dad alive, The feeling of having friends, and the situation I've found myself in with JJ. It was a lot and I never found the time to really come to terms with it all. I'm glad that everything had left my body. I'm so light that I feel like i'm walking on white fluffy clouds.

A small bag from the Surf Shack had caught my eye, I reach over and snatch it from my nightstand. Pawing at the contents I pull out a gorgeous pastel bikini set, It's either Purple or blue. Hard to in point the colour in the dark room.

Getting off the bed I could hear something else sliding on the paper bag. I stare at it with furrowed eyebrows for a few seconds before I fetch out a necklace. it's a smooth chuck of sea glass with a calico scallop shell thread through thick string.

my heart glows at the gifts they have given me. I swore to myself I'd eventually pay them back. I'm not entirely sure how, but I would.

Flicking the light on I pull the bikini onto my body and it fits perfectly. In the small broken and smudge mirror in the corner of my room, I noted how pretty the colour looked on my skin. I wondered how they knew my correct size.

After wrapping the necklace around my neck I pulled my day clothes back on. With one last glance in the mirror I sauntered out of room in hopes to find the girls responsible for my glow.

[renjouu]

— LEFTOVERS —

POSITIONS : LER! sunghoon , LEE! sunoo

WARNINGS : TICKLE FIC

A/N as requested, here is your ler sunghoon and lee sunoo fic! i apologize for the long wait!

as soon as sunghoon entered the dorm room he was starving, considering the fact he’s had a long day of work. the other members were either off schedule today or finished earlier than him.

he remembered he had his leftover food that he saved just for this day, and his stomach grumbled just thinking about it. he excitedly hopped towards the fridge and looked for his food, only to find out it has been eaten and the rest were in the trash.

“yah! who ate my leftovers?!” sunghoon shouted from the kitchen, causing all the members to come out expect one.

“what was your leftovers?” jay asks while rubbing his eyes, looking like he had just woken up from a long nap.

“the extra bibimbap that we made yesterday!” sunghoon replied in frustration, hand over his forehead.

“ah, the bibimbap? i believe sunoo ate it.” heeseung confessed, and sunghoon soon realized that sunoo was the only member not out at the kitchen.

“thanks for telling me who the culprit is, i’ll take it from here!” sunghoon smiled widely as he made his way towards sunoo’s room.

he knocked on the door and opened it as soon as he heard the other saying, “come in!”

“oh, hi hyung!” sunoo looked at sunghoon before putting his focus back on his phone.

“hi sunoo, i’ve had a long day of work.” sunghoon said, placing himself right by the younger.

“ah, really? are you tired?” the boy asks, his focus still on the game he was playing.

“yeah..i’m quite tired, and starving too.”

“go eat something then.” sunoo chuckled.

sunghoon sighed, “i was gonna eat my leftovers from yesterday but someone else beat me to it…i was wondering who?” he asked while raising a brow.

the younger froze and looked at sunghoon who was already smirking, “aish, come on. ‘i was wondering who?’, don’t act so clueless.” sunoo replied with a sassy look, voicing a mocking accent as he repeated the other’s words.

“did you eat my leftovers? huh, sunoo?” sunghoon said, poking the younger in the side a few times, causing him to jerk at every touch.

“okay! what if i did? i was hungry hyung.” he pouted.

“didn’t i tell you, the leftover bibimbap was mine?”

“i…look, i’m sorry, okay? i’ll make it up to you by treating you to dinner or something.”

“or…you can make it up to me by satisfying me.” and just like that, sunghoon pounced at the other and pinned him down on the bed.

“hehehey! hyuhuhung stahaha—!” sunoo burst out into giggles as soon as sunghoon started squeezing his sides up and down.

“someone needs a little punishment, no?” sunghoon smirked and moved his fingers towards sunoo’s hips, drilling his thumbs.

“yaHAHAH! I SAHAID SORRY!” sunoo shrieked, bucking his hips as they were mercilessly attacked.

“sorry isn’t enough for me.”

sunghoon scribbled his fingers all over sunoo’s bare stomach before reaching up to his ribs.

“plehehease dohohon’t!” the younger begged, knowing his weak spot was most likely gonna get attacked any second now.

“don’t? don’t worry sunoo, after this i’ll be completely satisfied.” the other spent no time stalling and went directly for sunoo’s ribs, earning a loud screech that was soon followed with screams.

“HYUHUHUHUNG! YOU MEHEHEANIE! STOHOHOP!” sunoo squirmed everywhere and the older finally stopped his torture.

“don’t eat my leftovers again unless i give you permission!” sunghoon scolded playfully before leaving the room.

[what-if-nct]

hiiii today's reminder is all three of the nct units coming back within the next two months, and the new unit might be debuting soon, and I'm having a hard time being excited for any of it

127, i just want them to take a nap. esp with the J line being injured enough to cancel smtown recordings, i would feel super weird enjoying a new song knowing that it was prepared in between nonstop concerts while three members were hurt. plus i REALLY don't want a 2 baddies part 2, i still don't understand why that song happened

wayv, they seem straight-up cursed at this point. I'm not gonna believe there's an album until the album is actually out. plus part of me is braced for the possibility of a rehashing of the incident from last year that we don't speak about, or at the very least knowing a lot of the discussion about this comeback will be centred around that, which I'm really not looking forward to

dream… i feel like every time i hear about them outside of teasers, it's just another case of them "playfully" making fun of Haechan, especially Jeno and Jisung, to the point where i just… dislike them, as people. i get that they were raised with the expectation that they'll be famous in a society that places a lot of weight on this shit, and I'm sure that's fucked with their heads a lot, but that's no excuse for grown ass adults not to have basic decency yk? it's turning me off the group, even though i love the rest of them. well, most of them, Jaemin and Chenle also give me those vibes, though i don't remember if they've ever explicitly said anything like that on camera

so… idk it's weird. I've spent more than two years with nct being my main hobby (idk if that word applies but it's the only one i could think of), and now it all feels a bit icky. I'm just holding on because i think new wayv content will bring me back to them

Hiii! And first of all I feel exactly the same way about everything that you've said. Every single word of it. Like 127 has been touring nonstop and are about to go out again plus a repackaged album after three members being injured. Like it's the kpop industry Skz is also extremely overworked. But like imagine the overall well being of them if they just released one album a year with multiple music videos, promote for like a month and one full and complete tour then, then they rest for at least 5 to 6 months. Or do their own obligations to brands and stuff. I know it's nothing like western pop music cause they run off of high engagement but it's just such a ridiculous system that is doing nothing but harm. They need rest. Sleep, and FOOD!! They're overworking on extreme diets. Like something has to give before it breaks

Then we have the complete opposite with Wayv where it's been two years since an album and despite there being a rightful reason for the delay right now. it's just so unfortunate that they're not getting to do anything. And I think we all know why wayv's comeback has been put on the back burner till now. I'm happy they had a break and they've been just having fun. But you see it in them they want to work, they're so excited for this album. Which I'm buying the moment it's released. But I just want everyone to focus on the boys for their comeback and not the situation around them. I'm sure it's been harder on every single member of Wayv then it is for us and we just gotta keep it a joyous occasion when it finally happens.

And yeahhh, like before I get to how I feel I just want to say before anyone says its part of their culture. Being Fatphobic and Colorist are bad things!!! It's a toxic part of most cultures! Colorism runs rampant in every single non white culture. And it's fucking bad! As a black person I can acknowledge the colorism in my culture is bullshit. And I have never thought that shit was funny. Im always disgusted seeing how dark skin women are treated. And don't get me started on fatphobia. I just want to know why we don't expect grown ass men who have access to the internet and global knowledge to go against societal norms like most of the Younger generations all over. Like why can't we expect better from them. Like Jeno saying why does Haechan have so much flesh after Haechan complimented his muscles like thats a strike. But when he said Haechan fits black panther..........my eye is twitching. And Jisung also always saying something. Sure we don't know they're dynamic. But Jisung was saying do you think Haechan will ever get paler alone out with Chenle. Like that's just not a joke like that shit effects Haechan who is gorgeous and perfect and beautiful. And I remember Haechan wanting a regular coke and Renjun insisting he get diet coke that rubbed me the wrong way for awhile. If my friends joked with me like that uh we're not friends anymore. Like it's toxic behavior like. It's bad no excuses. It's just bad. It's not okay to joke about esp in public spaces do they not understand their words effect Haechan and fans bigger and darker than Haechan. I think I have the most hope in Jaemin cause I just get that from him. Luckily I am a grown ass woman and it doesn't effect me the way it did when I was 16 and 17. It's why I took a break around 19, like kpop really fucked up my self esteem that I had just acquired. I totally feel you. Sidenote the skz thing with Changbin isn't apart of this. Felix and Chan were obviously talking about Changbin's muscles, he's a little beef cake they've both expressed envy of his physique. So Chan and Felix are cool.

I really don't want a 2 baddies part 2 either. Love 127 but thats one 127 song I can't defend. But when Wayv blesses us with their talent and beauty it'll be the best day.

[predoom]

ohoneohone

Sunday, October 23rd, 2005 9:42 am you see that kid... its not me, its you. blow out the candles on caring. encounters yesterday: went to paul walls jewelry shop. pretty insane. then when we played jared leto came over and watched. radio shows are wack. encounters today: the gold medal gymnast from the 2004 olympics is coming to hang out with me. pretty insane. why would you ever want to meet a boy like me. i am boring. you make it easier to make the decisions that i do. i turned off the switch that cares. i watch lots of movies and take lots of naps. cause i am a baby. i am gonna be in the academy video for black mamba. i can't tell you how excited that makes me. Wednesday, October 19th, 2005 11:48 pm ill be on time for that, i cant think of a line that rhymes with that blue looks better than jealousy. im awake but not up. you know what i mean. blew the speakers out like a candle. drowned out my sorrows in a wet dream. i miss you but only in flashing moments. new stuff over at buzznet. people been asking about the prices. honestly we charge what it costs us to make. alot of the stuff lately has been cut and sew or requires hand stitching which is expensive. so we try to keep the stuff really limited, so that it stays special. the bags sold out in a day. we won't be making anymore of that particular bag. but we will be making more limited bags and other items. Tuesday, October 18th, 2005 4:48 pm i, peter lewis kingston wentz, solemnly swear... im trying to figure it out. my head moves way faster than my mouth. i went to a party at chris from nsnyc's house for a party. it was about as good/bad as you would think. except dirty was there. so factor that one in. always up or down, never down and out.

the new nightmare of you record is fantastic. it makes me think of winters at home. love it or leave me. Sunday, October 16th, 2005 12:45 pm baby, im just bad news i don't know if it feels real been watching halloween movies lately to get me in the mood taking lots of naps its easier this way she wont ever love you the way she loves me youre not pretty enough and you dont make her heart beat been hiding messages in morse code and anagrams banging my wrist against the edge of the keyboard until it turns black and blue we're all settling all the time panic! at the disco makes me want to start this all over again coversations with you make me want it to never have begun at all nick plan and william beckett are on the list in one form or another always if you dont have your friends than you dont got shit and my friends are gold halloween is gonna be the best this year i think ive never been in california on halloween- it once was, but it hasnt been for a really long time spent most of the morning on the phone with my mommy cause she can always slow my breathing down you can get used to anything after a while even this, pete pretty boys for secret girls later skater Wednesday, October 12th, 2005 12:02 pm ill make you shake so hard you might not make it through the night new york city is fucking insane. get me. bruisa. fall makes me remember and want love.

okay okay cause i should:

1. you say crazy shit in your sleep, like about us living in old milwaukee. 2. right this second "wonderwall" sometimes star wars. 3. i dunno cherry coke flavored. 4. sugar tail, freckles in your eyes, basement windows, braces 5. new years on the windowsill. 6. uh kind of in a weird way the retriever head on the beagle body. just the nicest dog ever. 7. that one bane lyric, im pretty sure its a question. but mostly lately- what happened to my best friend?

nick york city. the clan party last night was rightious. im kinda going other places. feeling it. quit sleeping on it cause im the life. from the back of my legs to the back of my neck- im so glad there are people out there who won't let me fall off the face of the planet.

young.

panic at the disco at the knitting factory in new york tonight- 5pm. Tuesday, October 11th, 2005 12:57 am you remind me of this one movie. it makes me smile. but not with my mouth and way too many teeth. but with my eyes. trouble loves me. but you do way more. im dreaming on highway lines and phone hang-ups. just happy to be me. for one second.

i got a sweet vest and some teddy bear shoes. im good for cuddling. youre gonna have to trust me on that one. Sunday, October 9th, 2005 7:38 pm sometimes its hard to remember the great moments. but you remember everything to a detail the moment everything goes wrong. your ims are crazy: i am still not dead or married. im bringing home on the road.

silly. never ccccchhhhange. 12:12 pm you could almost make me an honest man. what i have spent the weekend thinking:

good friends in nyc sometimes my eyes are red and green but not like christmas. just kind of a mess. even when the worlds underwater you're rowing in my wet dreams. everything you know about me is totally wrong because it comes from choruses and camera flashes. you come in flashes in the middle of the night or in the morning. fix me in fourtyfive. everything she thinks you know about me is totally wrong because i can't say anything i mean ever. i say things just to hurt you. i get the job done but it doesn't look pretty. Saturday, October 8th, 2005 12:24 am you win some, you lose some sometime you wake up in the morning and everything is just different. moodcontroller gets turned off. probably on by someone else. the bottom of my pants are wet from running through puddles. the streets of albany got let in on some of my secrets. swoon. its weird how when you stand next to the sun you cant notice anything else. then the lights go out and all of a sudden there is beauty everywhere. im always too little, too late. one day everyone finds something they can hang on to. the bottom line is im all wishes and luck. and thats how its always been. in the tides of the streets. dreaming about beautiful babies. with batting eyelashes and huge eyes. we were never supposed to know. im the golden boy. you are my golden ticket. but the tides always going out. and two months turns into two years. in the blink of an eye. youre never home. the stars look the same from the gutter. pens running low just to keep up with the tolerance. ive got big plans for new years. and thats a way off but its the only way to keep my mind off of the way things go. just know "you're not the lifeforce" pete and thats what keeps heartsbeating at night. i only thought you were someone else. a simple case of mistaken identity. romantic fraud. new york city. im always on. Wednesday, October 5th, 2005 4:40 pm hateitorloveit-theunderdogisbackontop sickest afterparty in newyorkcity. hopefully i can fly a friend or two in so i dont hide out in the corners all night. nick thinks my lj entries have been kinda wack lately. i can't say i dont agree. i am a total baby. but not a baby like usher sings about. we're making some super sick limited bartskull nikes. im tired as usual. rumor of the day: i pretty much only like sxe girls. you make me laugh too much with the stuff that gets written on the internet sometimes. my life is radical sometimes. maybe ill really update this later. i dont even know. congratulations to panic at the disco for having the sickest first week numbers ever. that band is the new everything. late at night thats pretty much what i have to listen to or i dont feel okay. this morning i got a strange phonecall to end a strange dream. bane. Tuesday, October 4th, 2005 9:22 pm "someday we'll be nostalgic for this second..." im tired. red thread. baby blues. im a mess. lovable, not that likeable. lemme hum you a sweet one. i know ive been in a rut. the underdogs back on top. im writing this story. but i wouldnt bet on the ending. sometimes this thing has become too big to even think about. but sometimes i wake up in the morning and it feels like something is missing. youknowyouknow. 6:57 pm the secret to my suckcess pinchme. dear friends, you let me fall off. i forgive you though. if you forgive me. i am out of my head. me and nick have cooked up the sickest idea ever. i am writing a movie with patrick. my tummy hurts most of the time. major disappointment, reporting for duty. wtf. sometimes OMG! i heart the drama. sometimes OMG! i do not. like emeralds just past the sun- green but not the sick inside more like the film warming up to you. the camera is waking up. little boys and girls- get up. the trouble has lifted. youre gonna be okay. "tell me that you're alright". i like wearing your clothes. they are like a bulletproof vest. mostly i miss my friends and chicago. i want to bring you all out on the road.

"...idonthavetobethekingoftheworld, as long as im..."

peace out. i need to take a nap and eat some icecream. i bought nicholas scimeca a present. im tired. act suprised, even if you're not. fake the words. say i love you hard like you hate me. Saturday, October 1st, 2005 4:48 pm life on mars by david bowie reminds me of you the dreams i have for me are just for us. i am not sure i even know what this means. the pros and con are the same. legs tangled. its the kid you loved forever. i got a feeling what they're all saying. under the spotlight you think about the inside of wedding rings. in dark bunks you think about the inside of zippers. make me yours. make me come to life. honestly. black hair and batted eyelashes. dont give up im not sure where this is all going. right on reds and at altars. thinking about the way you are with the little pudgy boy. im getting this sweet tat. she knows what im talking about. Sunday, September 25th, 2005 7:29 pm the spaces in your hand were designed to fit my fingers dear world,

i have actually been sleeping late. i think it's not cause i am depressed. rather i just need to catch up on a couple of years. i think that the last while of my life is perfectly represented in the movie "closer". not to have a whine tasting... but. the point of saying that is more- i got the chance to show some of my friends our new video the other day. and in watching it, i am really stoked that one story comes through. there is this girl in it and she loves this guy just for who he is. and they aren't the prettiest or the coolest- but the thing they have is awesome. and perfect. it made me smile to see it come across. demar for pres. 2008. my bestfriend left town yesterday. totes devistation. summer bummer. blender is throwing a little afterparty that william beckett will be djing. if youre on the g-list you will be dancing. i am going to corpse bride tonight. i lost my crackers seeing p!atd live. they gave me the balls to make some decisions. im thinking about having all my body hair waxed off because it seems particularly offensive. you dont even wanna see what ive got planned for halloween.

preview: www.infect.buzznet.com bi curious: www.clandestine.buzznet.com

my body isnt yours anymore so you dont have a say in what i do with it. im this creature that resembles me but im something different.

[mylovelia]

from em to zee ~

aka from admin to admin but i just wanted to be cryptic

hi, my love! i hope this little letter finds you well :') i have all of these sweet things that ren is leaving for lia so i thought that i'd also leave something sweet for you!

i can't believe we've known each other for over a year now... we're coming up on two years in march. we've been through a lot together in just this short time — though it certainly hasn't felt short — and look at us still going strong! this is what a real marriage looks like, everyone should take notes 💪🏻 it's crazy how time flies, huh?

i know i always tell you how much you mean to me and i say it sincerely with my entire heart every time, but i don't think you realize just how special you truly are to me... you've made these past two years — shh, i'm rounding it up — of my life some of the most memorable and i've cherished every bit of our time spent together, even from miles apart. when i dropped out of public school to do everything solely online, i lost contact with all of my irls and i was lonely after a while. it seemed like everyone was growing up and moving along in life, they continued on easily without me and that made me feel sad. i guess i stayed stuck in my sixteen-year old era for a while and watched everyone go off to college, find their boyfriends, a few even had kids while i was gone and meanwhile i was cooping myself up in my room giggling over boy bands and binging fanfictions, still snuggled up with my dozens of plushies and sleeping with my fairy lights on. i guess i felt left out or left behind seeing everyone aside from me grow up. even the few mutuals i made online seemed ten times more mature than i could ever wish to be — they'd talk about their college struggles and adulting things that i wasn't taking part in at the time despite being 20 years old.

then i met you... i really like our origin story because only we could have met in such a goofy way. even before our grand reveal, just the short time we spoke outside of ren and lia, you were easy and fun to speak to and i enjoyed our little random admin talks. as we continued to talk more as ourselves outside of liju, i realized how similar we were and it felt so comforting to know that i had someone like you who i could turn to whenever i felt discouraged about anything. you were — and still are, of course — like my favorite plushie; my comfort and security. you've always been so kind, compassionate and understanding towards me and anyone who's had the pleasure of crossing paths with you. you've never made me feel childish or immature, you've always validated my feelings and actions even though some may have been questionable. you've always been encouraging and patient, and for that i'll always have such a special love for you.

your little encouragements mean the world to me, like when i'm nervous to make phone calls to people or when i have to have a serious talk with someone. you've always been here to cheer me on and i can't express how thankful i am to have such a lovely person like you in my life ~ i don't think i would be the person i am today without your presence, you've been a source of warmth and safety for me — like a patch of sunlight that lia enjoys napping in! so thank you, my love, for being you and for choosing to stay around even through the toughest of times. i cherish every moment i have with you — every message i receive, every voice note you leave, every rare selfie or video i get from you. they're all reminders that i get to wake up and be the luckiest wife in the world with the sweetest husband that's perfect for me ~ 🥰

that song that liju has claimed — the one linked in the pinned post — is for us, too. you already know that of course, but i like to remind myself that our beloved babies live on through our friendship. that song is meant for soulmates which, in my obviously correct opinion, are what we and liju both are ~ liju really paved the way for us- they walked so we could run! 🥹

anyways, this is getting quite long so i'll cut this off for now, but expect more admin love in the future! i love you and i appreciate you, you mean the absolute world to me and i'm so grateful to have met you in this lifetime. i hope we find each other in every other lifetime after this, too... happy valentine's day, my love!

i love you always, zaf ~ 💞

[mnanami]

Joro at home. 3 a.m.

Pairing: Draken x Mikey of Tokyo Revengers

Summary: Three o’clock in the morning. Dark clouds hung over Tokyo. Unfriendly weather forced Joro to break into the sleeping blond’s room through a slightly open window.

Word count: 3.8k

---

Knowledge of Tokyo Revengers manga/anime is not necessary. Draken/Ken-chin are one and the same person.

~*~

Today was a good day for Joro. In the morning he was awakened by the rays of the rising sun, which after a rather chilly night, were like a remedy for his slightly chilled body. Breakfast was no problem for him, literally materializing right in front of his eyes, and lunchtime meal he intended to eat out this time. So it seemed that the day would be much more gracious than the past, not fully slept night.

Taking advantage of the beautiful weather, full and rested after his morning nap, he spent most of this sunny day outside. The cloudless, starry sky spreading over Tokyo convinced Joro to spend the night outside this time, too.

After all, nothing foreshadowed what was about to happen around 3 a.m.

Huge raindrops hit the ground. Strong gusts of wind knocked Joro off on his feet, who almost immediately took the necessary steps to reach a dry, safe place. Using an open window in one of the ground-floor apartments, slipped inside unnoticed and breathed a sigh of relief when he found that the room had ideal conditions for a frozen and drenched „guest".

The only source of light in this relatively small room was a street lamp, whose bright stream coming from behind slightly soiled lampshade, cast an eye-pleasing orange glow, scattering across the wooden panels. Joro moved nimbly across the room. Living figure sleeping on the bed moved, forcing him to immediately flee to the farthest corner of the room. Stuck in stillnes, he waited for more clues that would help him decide his next steps.

Long, bright hair spread out in a wide fan on the snow-white pillow as the boy lying on it moved, laying his body on his back. Raising his eyelids slowly, he turned his sleepy gaze toward the potential source of the sound, and his heart nearly stopped when he saw the shining, coal-black eyes staring at him.

But that wasn't the worst part, it wasn't the eyes that made him panic.

Desperate, he grabbed the phone lying on the nightstand and with a trembling hand launched Line, where from his favorites list he selected the most appropriate contact in such a situation and immediately started the call.

– Ken-chin! – Mikey called out in a whisper as soon as a distinctive sound on the other end suggested answering the call.

On the phone receiver, he heard the rustling that would accompany the turning of his still sluggish body on the bed and waited impatiently for any sign of awareness from his friend.

– What's up Mikey? Do you realize what time it is? – The timbre of his voice betrayed that he was in the first phase of a slow awakening.

– You have to come here – he said, still whispering and not taking his eyes off the intruder in his room.

– Here...? It means where? – Mikey heard a vague question.

Mikey could have sworn that Ken-chin yawned.

– My place – he replied impatiently. – You must come here, Ken-chin – he repeated once again, almost pleadingly saying his name.

– You're starting to scare me. What's going on? – he asked much more counsciously.

– There's no time to explain. I don't know how long it'll stay in one place. What if it moves?

– ...Mikey...

– Just come, please – interrupted him, slowly losing his temper.

Every second counted and Ken-chin didn't seem to understand it. Isn't it obvious that if he didn't need him immediately, he'd wait until morning?

– ...Ok, I'll be there in 10 minutes.

– 5 – Mikey corrected him, not taking his eyes off the intruder still stuck in stillness.

– Fine.

Mikey didn't dare look away. The smartphone screen lit up the room, showing more clearly the vivid reason for his behavior, a behavior far different from the one known to all for its steadfastness and tenacity. He put the switched–on phone back on the bedside table and leaned his back against a soft pillow. His head touched the cool wall, obviously not allowing his gaze to wander anywhere else, to let a distant corner of the room go unattended by his watchful eyes.

Every few seconds he glanced nervously at the phone's display to see if maybe this time the passing time took pity on him and the last digit jumped up a level, heralding the ever–closer appearance of Ken-chin. But no matter what the indications were, he felt disappointed in every case. And so the next very long seconds passed, creating another very long minutes.

So until he heard the click of a lock turning and familiar footsteps in the short corridor, all that existed was him in a state at least close to hysteria, an intruder who Mikey could swear was challenging him with his attitude, and time that seemed to defy the laws of physics. The door to the room opened, and a tall figure of a blond–haired boy appeared. His hair was shaved about halfway down, from which this time he formed something like a messy bun. It was a rather surprising sight, considering that a long carefully braided hairstyle was a characteristic part of his appearance.

– You're late – Mikey greeted him with a reproachful look, remembering perfectly the clock's indication from a second ago.

– One minute – he said unmoved, closing the door. – Now tell me why you brought me here – he added, looking suspiciously around the room.

He saw no threat. Hadn't he made it? But in that case, where is the body?

– You have to get rid of it – Mikey demanded, pointing to a spot on Ken-chin's right.

Draken's gaze went in that direction. At the same moment, as if miraculously recovered, Joro shuddered, setting his until recently paralyzed body in motion. Moving his eight legs quickly, he ducked to the side, hiding behind a wooden cabinet.

– ...Seriously? – Draken looked deadly at his friend sitting on the bed and sighed when he stubbornly didn't react.

Two pairs of dark eyes stared at each other in silence. What Draken saw in Mikey's, what he hadn't seen before, was fear. It was completely unlike him, almost comical. That's why when he heard his breaking voice, the words he addressed to him – he almost laughed.

– I won't sleep as long as this thing is in my room – Mikey said, staring at him with his big black eyes.

– You made me leave my warm bed and fight my way through a wall of rain in the middle of the night. How are you going to repent?

Serious situation, serious reaction. Draken was proud of himself.

– First... get rid of it. I can't concentrate when I know it's around.

– And what am I supposed to do with it? I'm not going to put it outside in this weather.

– What?! I don't expect you to put it anywhere. You have to kill him – he blurted out, not believing that he had to explain it at all.

– I won't do it. If you want to have an innocent creature on your conscience so much, go ahead – he announced, making his friend even more shocked. – Now move over and make me a place.

Mikey got the impression that time stood still and the whole room was spinning, looping Ken-chin's words: I won't do it...I won't do it....

– ...No... if you won't kill him, what was the point of bringing you here?

He felt panic take over his stressed body again.

– None – he replied, unzipping his pants.

– Ken-chin, I'm begging you!

He tried to convince him in another way. He hoped that the pleading tone would soften his heart, which at the moment seemed to be made of stone. His fingers tightened on the material of his t-shirt, and he located his widened eyes in those of Ken-chin, equally dark, but still impassive.

– Move – he said, not commenting on his behavior in any way.

– No – Mikey countered, pulling him by his shirt.

Mikey's voice and behavior reminded Draken of an insufferable child he passed on the street yesterday, who terrorized more than one passerby with his screaming. Taking a different tactic, he grabbed him by both hands and forcibly placed him on a soft mattress, so that this one-person surface could also accommodate his exhausted body.

Probably he couldn't make it under different circumstances. Mikey's current condition was working against him, depriving him of that almost inhuman strength, the one that was hidden in his only seemingly innocent body.

– I should have called Baji – he muttered, turning his back on him like an offended child.

– But you didn't. Swallow it and go to sleep – Draken said, slipping the rubber band from his long hair, placing it on the nightstand next to him and closing his eyes.

– ...What if it comes here? – Mikey asked after a while, bringing a wide smile to the face of his friend lying next to him.

– In this last moment of your life, remember that you were my best friend and I will miss you – he replied, giving his tone of voice a serious tone.

– Not helping, Ken-chin – he said quietly, curling his body like a hurt, frightened creature.

Mikey's quiet and soft voice caused Draken's gaze to wander to his curled body. Moved by the sight, so unusual and surprising, he felt the need to speak up in a different way.

– I'll protect you... It won't even touch you – he assured, irresponsibly touching his arm.

– Promise?

– I promise – he said, slowly moving his hand.

– Thank you – Mikey whispered, tightening his fingers on Ken-chin's warm hand.

– Besides, its venom fangs cannot pierce the skin, you would only feel a slight pinch.

Along with his last word, he felt Mikey's body tighten and his fingers strengthen their grip.

– Ken-chin... knowing that it could touch me in any way makes me panic. I don't even want to think...

– Ok, I got it. I promised that he won't come near you.

– Then why you...

– Forget the fangs talk.

A quiet murmur was all Draken heard in response. Taking his hand from Mikey's shoulder, he intertwined both hands behind his head and closed his eyes.

It was better this way. He couldn't afford to make another mistake.

– When you came here... you had something strange on your head – Mikey's voice echoed through the dark room, shattering Draken's futile attempts to fall asleep.

– Why did it sound like a reproach? – he asked amused, without opening his eyes.

– Because it was.

– I had only 5 minutes, don't be picky.

Mikey turned his body to the other side. His eyes almost immediately located his friend's face. Draken's head rested on the shared pillow, and his calm breathing brought him slowly into a well-deserved, though nonetheless distant sleep. Mikey's hand unconsciously went to his long blond hair and touched its smooth surface with his fingertips.

– What are you doing?

Draken watched his silent friend, whose action shattered the recent apparent calm.

– I was checking to see if it was still there – he explained, without withdrawing his hand.

– You didn't like it that much?

– You looked... different.

– In a bad way?

– Not sure. I don't have enough data.

And once again aware of the mistake he was making, Draken could not suppress the strong urge to touch him as well. Following his answer-seeking friend, Draken moved his hand and sank his long, slender fingers into Mikey's soft hair.

– What are you doing? – Mikey repeated the question that came from Ken-chin's mouth just a moment ago.

– Checking how it is – Draken explained rather laconically.

Mikey's eyes hid behind the soft skin of his eyelids as Draken's fingertips sunk deeper, boldly touching his skin.

– Has anyone... touched your hair before? – Mikey asked, without opening his eyes.

– Yes.

The answer stirred unpleasant emotions in him. Stronger than he expected to feel.

– Who?

– Sachiko.

– Who is she?

And more importantly – why did you let her touch your hair?! The second question didn't come up. Mikey's mind didn't allow it to reach Ken-chin.

– The hairdresser I've been going to for many years – he replied, forcing himself to be serious.

Mikey's moody voice made him incredibly happy.

When, once again, a quiet murmur was all he heard from him, this time it was he who asked.

– Has anyone touched your hair before?

– Shin.

– ...And ...who is Shin? – the tone of his voice sounded similar to Mikey's.

Although, he guessed under what circumstances the whole procedure with touching took place, he felt a strange urge to destroy something in his tightly clenched fingers of his right hand.

– Does it matter?

Draken refrained from asking further questions. Instead, he steered the conversation onto a slightly different track.

– ...Does this mean that no girl has done t h e s e? – he asked, running his fingers through Mikey's hair.

– No and I don't care. – He spoke the second part of his answer in a much quieter tone.

– Interesting.

So did he hear it after all?

Mikey tensed, tensing his muscles unnaturally. Averting his gaze, Mikey withdrew his still unsatisfied fingers. Draken's hand froze, letting his fingers rest freely on his friend's head. He didn't want to lose contact with him. Not yet.

– Are you bored? – asked Draken, extremely curious about the answer.

Mikey's disobedient body brought him another wave of heat. However, this time its source was not hidden in a monster on frail legs. The source had a completely different form, it was much closer, dangerously close.

– I wouldn't fall asleep that way – he replied evasively.

Draken smiled slightly upon hearing this forced comment, and ready to do the same, his hand returned to its original position, just behind his head.

Mikey understood perfectly what was happening. He understood, and at the same time tried with all his might to deny it. He told himself that the reason was the strange atmosphere, full of irrational mystery, the darkness in the room and this almost unbearable negligible distance between them. He told himself that under different circumstances his thoughts would not have wandered into such distant and unknown corners of his mind. Under normal circumstances, he would never have allowed himself such a scenario.

But is it really true?

After all, this isn't the first time Ken-chin's presence has simultaneously calmed and stimulated him. In that case, is there any point in denying it? Isn't it better to accept defeat and move on? Isn't it better to get honest and simply try to forget?

Aware that this was probably the last time Ken-chin would allow him to be this close, Mikey moved closer and grasped the material of his shirt in his fingers. Stimulated by his more intense scent, he closed his eyes, letting the pleasant scent fill his senses.

– I didn't know you were afraid of spiders – Draken said quietly.

The sound of his voice didn't betray one bit of what was going on inside him. Of how Mikey's unexpected gesture, affected his already rebellious heart.

– This is new to me – he added, but this time with the last word, he allowed himself something more.

He slowly raised his right hand, rested it on the mattress just behind Mikey's back, and, hesitating for a moment more, finally dared to touch them. Mikey shuddered. The warmth of Ken-chin's fingers felt behind the thin material of his t-shirt penetrated this fragile barrier and sank deeper, amazingly stimulating the receptors on his skin.

– Only you know about it – he said, struggling to control the tone, volume and speed of his voice. – If you tell anyone, I'll know it's you.

– It would be unwise to betray your only weakness.

– The only one you know – he corrected him quietly.

– There are more?

– Yes, but don't ask. I won't tell you anyway.

– ...What if I promised you that I'd get rid of Joro? – Draken asked, moving his hand a little higher.

Mikey's body tensed, which was easily sensed by Ken-chin's fingers touching him.

– ...Who?

– The spider from behind the closet. Although, in fact, it could be anywhere now.

– You're not playing fair – Mikey muttered, not daring to open his eyes.

He saw the impenetrable darkness that spread out right in front of him as a safe space where the word 'failure' did not exist. He wanted to believe that just behind the delicate skin of his eyelids there was nothing worth taking the risk to open his eyes and see if the illusory world in his head really existed.

– By the way, it doesn't have to be a spider. – Draken's voice rang out again. – Did you know that there is a yōkai named Jorōgumo who can take the form of a beautiful woman or a large spider?

When no response from his friend lying right next to him came, and the only reaction to his words was a stronger grip of Mikey's fingers on the cotton material of his t-shirt, Draken decided to continue.

– And did you know that these yōkai feed on young men?

– If so, shouldn't you also feel threatened?

– Good point.

– ...Since you know my weakness, it would be fair if you tell me yours – Mikey stated, remaining in the safe bubble of his own imagination.

– Yes, it would. But I'm afraid that would be the last thing you'd hear from me.

The illusory bubble burst, shattering irretrievably. Dark eyes met the other's, staring at him with utmost attention and a kind of sadness.

– I don't understand... – he said, getting the impression that the meaning of Ken-chin's next words would change everything.

– I don't want to lose you Mikey, so it's better if I don't dispel your doubts.

The chaos in his mind made it difficult to focus. Looping thoughts, at times absurd, forced him to speak back to Ken-chin in a way that would leave him no choice but to give in and confess the truth.

– Explain it to me – Mikey demanded, feeling his heart speed up, reaching unnatural speeds – and let me decide if you deserve to lose me.

A thought flashed through Draken's mind that although the chances were small, they were not really zero, that he had the right to hope. Fighting an internal battle, he didn't expect that the outcome would be decided by this seemingly small gesture from the boy staring at him.

Once again, Mikey's hand boldly moved toward Ken-chin's face, but this time it stopped captured by his strong fingers.

– You do realize that this is not able to stop me, right? – Mikey said without taking his eyes off him.

– Yes, although I'm not sure why.... What you were trying to do.

– Let me go, I'll show you.

– ...Isn't it strange? – Draken asked quietly.

His fingers still clenched tightly in Mikey's warm palm.

– What?

– The way we behave.

– Damn strange – Mikey admitted, causing Ken-chin's quiet laughter to reach his ears.

– If so, I think I'll take my chance – he said, pressing his hand against his warm cheek.

Mikey's eyes widened and his anxious heart sped up its work. Is it right to take his behavior in this way? Is it responsible to trust his own intuition? An intuition disturbed by the emotions bubbling up inside him?

– You're stronger than me, so stop me if I cross the line – Ken-chin spoke softly, giving him time to understand what was going on.

Very slowly and with hesitation noticeable in his movements, Draken brought him even closer to himself and held him close enough that he could feel his warm breath on his skin.

– Is it normal? – Mikey's voice was filled with emotion.

– What do you mean? – Draken asked, trying to trust his own senses, what he sees, hears and feels.

– That I don't mind...

– No, but...

– But?

– I'm not sure if I want to be normal... or if I want you to be.

– What's holding you back?

– It's hard to explain.

– You're scared – Mikey said, almost accusingly.

– Yes. I'm afraid that my action will destroy what is between us, and at the same time I'm afraid that if I don't take the risk, I'll lose the chance to see how close you would let me get to you.

– ...You're not a coward, Ken-chin. It's in your nature to take risks.

Provoked by his words, Ken-chin stopped analyzing his every potential move. Loosening the grip around his hand, he felt Mikey's fingers adjust to the shape of his cheek and slowly move higher, weaving their way into his long hair, which fell loosely around his neck and shoulders. His own hand found a rest on Mikey's face, slowly and carefully exploring every inch with his fingertips. Stopping near the lips, he ran his fingers over it and parting it gently, got close enough to taste it.

– It took an awfully long time – he heard Mikey's quiet whisper.

– They say mood is important – he replied with a slight amusement.

– Apparently so – Mikey agreed, expecting that this was not all they had experienced, that the tension between them would lead them in only one right direction.

As expected and as their needs grew stronger, their lips found each other again, and impatient hands made the space between them stop existing. The two moved independently, yet in remarkable synchronization, pushing against each other even more, so that the sensation of closeness reached another, higher level. The subtle kisses they shared gradually gained pace, significantly changing their character. Deeper and deeper, longer and longer, and more and more addictive, they deprived them of the ability to consciously control themselves, to return to a place that at the moment their flustered minds perceived as something irrelevant, something that never existed. That's why when Ken-chin moved, laying his body on top of the other one, the one belonging to the blond-haired, shorter boy staring at him with his shining black eyes, they both realized that returning to the life before that moment, was impossible. Ken-chin's kindness and unusual understanding of the surrounding world, not once suprised Mikey and made him feel safe. Knowing that he was next to him, that he could always count on him, gave him courage and faith that if he ever got lost, he would find him. Ken-chin will do anything to bring him back.

– Have I reached the limit? – heard his quiet question, snapping him out of his momentary daze.

– Limit? – Mikey repeated, not understanding.

– Have I gone too far? – he asked in a different way.

– I don't think there is any limit – Mikey replied, creating a unique confusion in Ken-chin's mind as well as his own.

– Impossible.

Mikey smiled, moving his hand to the spot where Ken-chin's smooth scalp was marked with a black tattoo under his hairline, and trailing his fingers along the sunken ink, forced his way closer to him. Their faces were almost touched each other, their breaths mingled with each other, and their gazes clearly betrayed what was to come next.

– In that case... let's find out which one of us is right – Mikey whispered against his lips.

...

„There are times when you can't give up." Draken, Tokyo Revengers

[jdgo51]

The Age Old Question: Did God Really Say?

Today's inspiration comes from:

Nothing Wasted

by Kasey Van Norman

"'One minute, I was on a high of living my best life now! I had it all — my good ol’ boy husband, Justin, who would take a bullet for me, healthy children, a dream home nestled in the heart of East Texas complete with white picket fence and a kitchen overflowing with friends on any given night. I had a good reputation in my thirty-thousand-member hometown (no small feat) and the respect of my church as a leader, and as a woman (again, no small feat in the Southern Baptist, white evangelical, Bible Belt of the world).

Then in the very next minute, my entire life came crashing to the ground.

After months of dismissing her gut instinct, my best friend Rachel, decided to dig deeper into her husband, Ty’s, phone records. When she did, she unknowingly unleashed the beginning of our end — the day my secret, 3-year affair with Ty finally hit the light of day.

I think all of our life-altering ends find their beginning in the same four words Satan posed as a question to Eve in the garden: “Did God really say?”

“Kasey, did God really say he doesn’t need your help running the universe?”

“Did God really say you are enough right where you are?”

“Kasey, did God really say Justin is the right guy for you — forever? What if Justin really knew you — who you’ve been, what you’ve done? Would he stay then, love you then?”

“Did God really say you must not eat from just any tree in the garden?”

No wonder Paul compared the Christians of Corinth to Eve’s worst day when he confessed how scared he was for them. Paul was afraid that just like Eve, they would be deceived by the serpent’s cunning and their minds led astray from their sincere and pure devotion to Christ (2 Corinthians 11:3).

Even now, his warning echoes through the corridor of our twenty-first-century church that, just like our first mother, Eve, smack dab in the middle of everything she could possibly want or need, God’s chosen can still be lured into believing it isn’t enough. That even the most authentic and committed Christ-followers can find themselves beguiled by Satan’s charms, blind to the truth and belly-up in painful repercussion.

May we not forget that Satan’s ultimate fight is with God.

And because Satan knows he is not powerful enough to land an attack on his true nemesis, he will use all of his time and resources to wage war on the next best thing — God’s real, authentic children.

Like Eve, my intention was never to distrust God. Like her, I loved God, knew Him and spent daily time with Him. It was unlikely I would turn my back on Him over something as simple as attraction to the wrong man. Like Eve, I had to think about my decision, spend time turning the fruit over and over in my hands — smell it, position it on the mantel so I could stand back and stare at it a few weeks before biting into it.

Also, like Eve, I did something much more devastating than just take a bite of fruit; I used my love for God to justify disobeying Him. Over time, I convinced myself that God needed my help. Help running my marriage, my friendships, my life.

Satan’s ultimate fight is with God.

The longer I pondered Satan’s question, the more reasonable it became. Maybe I did understand parts of Ty that Rachel didn’t. Perhaps Ty did need my emotional support if their marriage was to be successful. Maybe Justin really wouldn’t care that I sneaked out of bed each night to “counsel” Ty over the phone, it being ministry, accountability, community, and all. If the fruit helped our marriages be wise and more like God, why wouldn’t I eat it?

In those moments after hearing Ty’s voice for the last time, alone in my house in the silence of napping children and surrounded by five loads of unfolded clothes, the next sound I heard caught me off guard in every way.

Laughter.

My own.

And not just tiny, breathless sighs or a chuckle but hysterical, from the belly, loud enough to wake my kids and throw my feet scissor-kicking in the air kind of laughter.

It sounds horrible, I know. Here I am holding a ticking time bomb that will destroy everyone around me and I’m laughing.

Had anyone else been in the room, I would have felt embarrassed or guilty. But as years of shackles fell to the ground and the weight of secrecy lifted from my shoulders, my heart erupted in such pure freedom that it could not help but spill over with laughter.

Rachel knew the truth. Ty said it was over. Maybe I could finally be free.

The courage to confess my adultery was suddenly forced upon me. I was no longer in control, no longer blind or deceived. My mind was more awake and clear than it had been in years.

I had no idea what life would be like one hour, one week, or one year from this moment. My mind raced in a million directions. Would Justin leave, take our kids, what was Rachel thinking, would she take their kids? All I knew was that life would never be the same. Out of sincere gratitude for that fact, I laughed.

Maybe life could finally make sense now that I wasn’t running it. Now that plates were no longer spinning above my head, I could finally take a good, hard look through all of the broken pieces on the floor.

The lie I pampered and put makeup on and played with in secret could be seen for what it was — fear. Fear I would never be enough, fear no one could love the most honest version of me, fear that I, a devoted church girl, was capable of scandalous, horrible things just like the next girl. Fear that I was exactly who I thought I was — needy.

Most people think that fear is a lack of faith. But it takes great faith to fear. Faith is hoping in something we cannot see. Fear functions in a similar way. When we are scared, it is easy to have faith in the “what if” scenarios we make up in our heads but are not necessarily true. At its core, fear is not lack of faith.

Fear is questioning God’s love for us.

How clever, Satan. We call your bluff. Use God to turn us against him. Distract us just long enough to switch the awe-inspiring fear of God into the pride-inducing fear of man. Use the cloak of godliness to disguise the subtle shift from “God is enough” to “I’m not enough.”

Which leads me back to what God really said…

God really did command Adam and Eve not to eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil and warn them that to do so would bring death. But what Eve seemed to forget in her conversation with the serpent was what else God really said. “You are free. Free to eat anything and everything else. Free to create, work, have sex. Free to rest in the life-sustaining peace that because I am God, you don’t have to be.” (See Genesis 2:15-17.)

God really did say that He alone is the measure of all that is true, good, and right in this world. He placed a tree in the middle of our lives to remind us of our mortality and His sovereignty over those attributes. He knew how devastated we would be when our version of truth, goodness, and justice proved to be ever-changing, misunderstood, and packed with impossibly high standards.

So, we remember our freedom tree, the tree of God’s sovereignty, His full command over all created beings. Like Adam and Eve, we’ve been given this one life, our one story, to know and understand God’s grand, eternal purpose — the best story.

So, it’s not enough to say that God uses our lives if He does not also design them.

What God permits, He permits for a reason. And that reason is His design.

Because He didn’t stop it — for me, for you, and for millions of people throughout history — He has a purpose for it. And if we don’t believe our lives are designed and purposed by God, we will waste them.

This is our story — the beginning of our end, when God takes His rightful place as the greatest love of our lives. This is the moment we finally take Him up on his offer to be exactly who He says He is."'

Adapted for Devotionals Daily by Kasey Van Norman from her book Nothing Wasted.

[starsfic]

So, i Love the idea of demon courting rituals including kidnapping at a certain point (I say at a certain point because I like to imagine INTRICATE RITUALS as to not to actually kidnap someone who doesn't want to be napped) so I love the idea of Red just showing up at MKs place and misunderstandings happening, but we sleep on the idea of MK reading up on what the hell Red Son is doing, realizing he's been trying to court him and that he has blown him off in the worst way... And deciding that demon courting him right back is the only way to show that he gets it now and that he very much likes the idea of going on a date with him.

Please picture it, MK awkwardly stumbling trough Red Sons window, who wakes up in confusion "Noodleboy. There better be a good explanation as to why you are in my roo- " "RED SON! I HAVE COME TO VOICE MY INTENT OF STEALING YOU AWAY IN THREE NIGHTS! DO NOT ATTEMPT RESITANCE AS IT WILL BE FERTI- wait no that can't be right, damn writing got smudge-CRAP MY NOTES!" "Waitwaitwait, are you... Attempting COURTSHIP?" "Uh..." "WHY DIDN'T YOU LET ME TAKE YOU AWAY THEN?" "Listen! There are some cultural differences here that may have gotten lost in translation and I thought you might have been threatening me." "...ah...." "Sssoooo... I'm just gonna say it, if you're still up for it I am gonna come back in three days and tie you up or get a bag and then we can go back to my place or watch a movie or." "Do it now." "Uh, but there's a whole thing where we have to fight tomorrow and the day after I have to give you a gift and you have to take it and-" "Consider it done. Do it now." Cut to MK carrying Red Son bridal style, with the flimsiest rope they could find in such a short notice binding his wrists together poorly, both of them absolutely giddy that this worked out after all.

Today had been the worst day in Red Son’s life, second only to his father being sealed away.

The Noodle Boy had rejected his courtship.

Red had done everything right! They had fought and Red had demonstrated how strong of a partner he would be. He had gotten him gifts, like that fancy art set he knew Xiaotian had been eyeing for months! He had researched and studied and had gotten to know Xiaotian for the best courtship and now that had gone all out the window.

He groaned into his pillow, which he had spent most of the day crying in. Everything was awful. Nothing was worth it. His mother was probably planning some kind of over-the-top vengeance for him. It didn’t matter.

Even when a window squeaked open and there was a yelp as whoever it was fell in.

Red glanced back and groaned. "Noodle Boy. There better be a good explanation as to why you are in my roo- " 

Qi Xiaotian held up a hand and fished out a stack of index cards. Red sat up, staring at him as he scanned over whatever was on it before clearing his throat. "RED SON! I HAVE COME TO VOICE MY INTENT OF STEALING YOU AWAY IN THREE NIGHTS! DO NOT ATTEMPT RESITANCE AS IT WILL BE FERTI-” He paused. “Wait, no, that can't be right, damn writing got smudge- The-” He dropped the stack and shrieked. “CRAP, MY NOTES!" 

His heart racing, Red pulled the covers off himself. "Wait wait wait, are you... Attempting COURTSHIP?" 

Xiaotian looked up from where he was trying to pick up the cards. "Uh...Yes?" 

"WHY DIDN'T YOU LET ME TAKE YOU AWAY THEN?" Red had been fully prepared and everything! All his preparations had gone to waste this afternoon! And now Xiaotian was here?!

Said Noodle Boy scrambled up, hands raised in a gesture of peace. "Listen! There are some cultural differences here that may have gotten lost in translation and I thought you might have been threatening me." 

"...ah...." Now that he thought about it, straight up saying he was kidnapping him to who knows where might’ve not been the smoothest opening.

"Sssoooo... I'm just gonna say it, if you're still up for it, I am gonna come back in three days and tie you up or get a bag and then we can go back to my place or watch a movie or-" 

"Do it now." Red scrambled out of bed and looked around. Ugh, he had gotten rid of the red silk he was going to use on Xiaotian!

Xiaotian blinked as Red passed him and threw open his closet, beginning to shuffle through it. "Uh, but there's a whole thing where we have to fight tomorrow and the day after I have to give you a gift and you have to take it and-" 

There! Red yanked out a thin sash he wore on one of his nicer suits. He threw it at Xiaotian, who fumbled and dropped his cards again but caught the sash. Red held up his wrists. "Consider it done. Do it now."

Soon enough, Xiaotian was dropping out the window to the tuk-tuk, Red secure in his arms. The fire demon’s wrists were poorly tied but it didn’t matter. 

Not when he was grinning like an idiot at his Noodle Boy’s own stupid grin.

[leandrafalconwing]

Fandom tends to portray Elwing as a single mother in over her head with parenting and leading the Havens of Sirion without any real support network (with or without a dose of jewel-sickness) but I was having Thoughts about Sirion today and let’s be real, she probably did have a support system. Do you really think the people who carried baby Elwing from the sack of Menegroth would just shrug and say “Eh, she’s apparently an adult now, she’s got this, we can leave her alone”? Would the Gondolindrim who doted on baby Earendil stand back and not have any interest in his sons? Elves treasure children, and so do a lot of humans.

Consider these possibilities instead: Elwing really needs to be at this meeting, but fortunately there’s a whole pack of honorary aunts and uncles absolutely delighted at the possibility of carrying little Elrond and Elros off to play with them for a couple of hours. Elwing needs to get back home to put the kids to bed? Well, it just happens to be the perfect time for a break, right everyone? They can pick the meeting back up when she gets back. Elwing is down at the beach helping her sons build sand castles but you really need to talk to her about something? Better be prepared to play in the sand too while you bring up your issue to her! Elwing didn’t get much sleep because the boys were trading off who had nightmares and she spent most of the night comforting them? Go take a nap, Elwing, we’ve got your kids and someone will handle the day’s duties.

In short, Elrond and Elros were the darlings of the Havens and everyone was willing to step in where needed, both in raising them and in supporting Elwing when her husband is away. We have so little detail in canon, it’s not like I can prove any of this, but it feels pretty plausible to me, and more plausible than Elwing being left to flounder despite being surrounded by people who love her and love her family. This means, of course, that when the Third Kinslaying occurred, Elrond and Elros didn’t just lose their mother; they lost playmates and [honorary] aunts, uncles, and grandparents.

[miss-tc-nova]

Fangs - Leona x Jamil

Yep, I found my TWST ship. Yay! More about it later. 

Also, I AM taking suggestions on the ship name. Halp. 

Inspiration: This Video (WARNING: the song is VERY explicit)

Premise: Jamil doesn’t know what to do with his free time, but Leona exposes his fangs.

~~~~~

              Well this is an unusual moment of calm. Its rarity leaves the young man disorientated. All of his chores are done and he can’t do much more prep without being wasteful. For once, Jamil’s free and he has no idea what he’s supposed to do with it.

              The pop music club is attending a concert today hosted by Night Raven College and, as long as they help with the setup, the club gets free tickets to the show. This means Kalim is busy all day, leaving Jamil high and dry on his own. Sure, this had been in the making for like three months, but something in the young retainer didn’t believe that it would ever happen; it had been a pipe dream proposed by the silly club trio after all. Even as they spent the last week excitedly preparing, Jamil never truly came to terms with it. Of course, he would be attending the concert as well—not willing to leave Kalim alone in a crowd—but until then, the prince would be with his club mates and not in need of babysitting. Hopefully.

              At first, Jamil nearly convinced himself to go help out just for something to do—or perhaps to have his eyes on Kalim. Regardless of the reason, he’s decided on not going. Still, deciding on what to do now is proving surprisingly difficult. Before he can lose too much time, however, homework in the library becomes the chosen endeavor.

              Jamil wanders towards the back of the room, finding a quiet table in a lonely corner. The pen scratches away in the silence, filling in each answer with ease. Homework is generally nothing challenging for the boy; in fact, most time is wasted as he rereads his every answer to gauge potential grades. It wouldn’t do to draw attention with high marks—no matter how smart he really is.

              A pointed period dots the paper, followed by a sigh of disappointment. Even in solitude, this is his life.

              As Jamil shifts in his seat to continue, his foot meets an uneven surface.

              “Ow! Son of a bitch!”

              Air catches in his chest at that voice. From below the table pops a pair of ears, followed closely by a pair of glowering green eyes. It was a tail that he stepped on—that of Savanaclaw’s housewarden: Leona Kingscholar.

              “A-Ah, my apologies,” Jamil says, more surprised than apologetic.

              The man sits upright, full of annoyance and every muscle in Jamil’s body prepares for escalation. “I should put you on your ass for that.” A yawn shows off those pointed canines. “You’re lucky the sun’s out.”

              Of course he’d be napping here; it’s quiet and the sun is shining through the window right onto the sofa Leona had been dozing on.

              “I see. How fortunate for me.” Jamil reaches for his bag. “I can find another place to study if you’d like to continue sleeping.”

              A hand waves him down. “Forget it. I’m up now.”

              It’s an unexpected statement that thwarts the escape and Jamil finds himself unsure whether or not he should still make a run for it.

              Eyeing the younger student, Leona comments, “I see you’re not sulking after that little prince of yours.”

              A bit ruffled, Jamil turns his sights back on his work. “I do not sulk.”

              “Sure sure. You can hide those fangs all you want, but I know a killer when I see one.”

              The pen, gripped tighter, continues scratching away. “We’ve had this discussion before; I’ve never had such a thought in my life.”

              “Except when you actually killed that guy two years ago.”

              Suddenly tearing through the paper, the writing utensil veers off course. Charcoal eyes bolt to the lion; his mind barely contains the shock to maintain his composed face. But Leona is a hunter who’s done his homework. He knows and, even without the stationary snafu, has probably picked up every sign of surprise.

              It’s impressive how smooth Jamil’s voice remains. “There was no proof that I was the culprit for that man’s unfortunate end.”

              Oh, Leona’s smug grin is both fascinating and imposing. “Oh right. The whole investigation got dropped because there wasn’t enough evidence.” A fist presses against the prince’s cheek. “Served him right anyway.”

              Any sudden change in conversation would only pique Leona’s interest. Jamil chooses to play along. “You think so?”

              “Yeah. Kalim probably wouldn’t even be here if that man had managed to sneak that viper into his room.”

              “It was a cobra.”

              It’s ever so slight, but the way those eyes gleam show the predator closing in. “Funny. The report never actually stated what kind of snake it was—only that he was bitten by his own trap before it escaped.”

              Jamil’s blood runs like ice as Leona leans closer.

              “The man was found in the hall. Kalim claimed to have been studying for entrance exams at that time. So, tell me, when exactly did Kalim’s habit of having evening tea to help him study begin?”

              Teeth gnash together, terrified to say anything else.

              “’Cause that would put that guy right in your path on your way back to him. And of course, no one would suspect an average kid like you to have awakened his signature spell yet.” Emerald eyes have him completely cornered and Jamil couldn’t look away if he wanted. “Bet he never had a chance when you made him stick his hand in the bag.”

              This is bad; so bad. Leona’s accusation could possibly reopen the entire investigation. His image would be obliterated, ruining innocent lives in the process.

              The words rumble in the victorious hunter’s chest. “Harmless retainer, my ass. You’re every bit a snake as your name.”

              He has to put a stop this—to silence this nosey cat before he can spread the truth.

              The entire charade goes out the window. “Not that I actually care. It’s old news and only a moron would underestimate even a prince’s youngest retainer. So you can stop plotting to kill me.”

              All the tension drains from Jamil in a wave of disbelief. “What?”

              Leaning back, Leona crosses his arms. He’s not even vaguely concerned about drawing Jamil’s venom. “I ain’t no snitch.”

              And Jamil believes him. Having long since learned even the smallest signs, he finds no trace of deceit in the finicky feline. Jamil is still cautious, yet it’s marred with relief and something else he can’t quite put a finger on. Here sits someone, knowing one of his darkest secrets, and he doesn’t even care. Refreshing might be the word. No, that’s not quite it.

              Leona hums, “I bet Kalim doesn’t even know what you did for him.”

              A breathy laugh escapes the retainer. “Defended me every second I was being interrogated.”

              “Damn, that kid’s all sunshine and rainbows. How can you stand bein’ around that all the time? Don’t you just wanna tear that stupid, smiling face open?”

              There’s no use lying. “It’s…It’s not worth it.”

              “Why? ‘Cause you think it’ll ruin that perfect servant thing you’ve got goin’ on?”

              Fingers fidget with the torn work. “If only.”

              “Lemme guess, your family depends on your ability to keep the prince safe and happy,” Leona scoffs. “Your parents made their choices and it ain’t dependent on you.”

              Jamil bites back. “And what about my sister?”

              There’s backtracking. “I guess…”

              “You think I haven’t thought about how others see me? That’s all I think about and for good reason.” Leona doesn’t press, giving Jamil the chance to reel in his nascent frustration. “Why are you doing this? Are you trying to blackmail me to get at Kalim?”

              “Nah, he’s boring as hell—nothin’ I get outta that friendship.” Cat eyes look him over. “You, on the other hand, make a pretty interesting plaything.”

              His nose scrunches. “Plaything?”

              “You make lookin’ average a sport, but I wanna see what you can really do.” Intrigue gleams in his expression. “What kind of venom are you hiding?”

              “It’s unwise to play with snakes,” warns the second year.

              “Why? You gonna bite?” A fang glints in that grin. “’Cause I might be into that.”

              A flash of fire surges into Jamil’s ears. “Excuse me?!”

              That deep chuckle turns up the heat. “What’s wrong? Can’t hide behind that mediocre façade with me, so you might as well play the game.”

              Flustering aside, there’s no denying the temptation simmering in the lion’s offer. “And what game is that?”  

              “Take your pick.”

              A knuckle meets his chin in contemplation. He wasn’t prepared for anything like this, let alone for it to come from Leona Kingscholar. Accepting may lead to further discontent down the line or perhaps worse. Still, it proves too much for Jamil to pass up.

              “Alright. Let’s play.”

              It doesn’t take long for the two to leave the library and make their way to the Savanaclaw Dorm. Anticipations swells in him as Jamil faces the housewarden on the spelldrive field. He’s never had a chance to go all out for fear of upstaging Kalim, but now he has a chance to find out what he’s really capable of. And he knows it’s nothing to scoff at.

              Across the field, Leona waves him on. “Go on. Impress me, little snake.”

              Surprising him, a smile tugs at Jamil’s lips. “Oh, big kitty wants to be entertained?”

              “I want an opponent worth crushing.” The disc hovers in the lion’s palm.

              Digging his heels into the dirt, Jamil readies himself. “We’ll see who’s crushed when I win.”

              “Show me those fangs of yours.”

~~~~~

              He lost.

              Jamil lost to Leona. Even so, in this moment of defeat, as he lays in the dirt staring up at the dusky sky, a smile splits his face.

              “Yo.” The lion leans over him, instigating that elation with his heavy breathing. “You dead yet?”

              It brings laughter to his lips. “No. Not yet.”

              Leona cracks a grin. “Good. So I can kick your ass again later.”

              “Don’t get too full of yourself; you won because I missed the disc by three centimeters at most.” The Scarabian accepts the hand that pulls him up.

              “A win’s a win, Little Snake.”

              “That I concede—” Jamil returns the cocky expression. “—but next time my fangs won’t miss.”

              “We’ll see about that.” Leona’s pride slips somewhat. “You didn’t hold back, did you?”

              He sighs truth. “Not even a little.”

              “Good.”

              Grey eyes wander that brash confidence. This is not how he intended to spend his free time from his never-ending job, but words cannot begin to describe this euphoria.

              Before he realizes what he’s doing, Jamil’s lips meet Leona’s face. Immediately after, Jamil feels he’s been set alight. Even the prince is surprised and the snake pulls his hood over his face, wishing he could slither away and never leave his room again.

              But the upperclassman laughs. “If you’re gonna thank me, you could at least kiss me properly.”

              Jamil peers from beneath his jacket. That’s it. That’s exactly what that meant to him. He’d never seen Leona as more than a spoiled prince, just as he had Kalim. The royal had never given him any reason to think otherwise and was actually rather selfish and stubborn. Yet there’s no denying that Leona had given him something no one else ever had—an opportunity to be himself to the fullest—and he’s grateful more than he could ever express.

              But he can’t let the Big Kitty win all the games.

              A smirk in place, Jamil forces the tension away. “Maybe next time.”

              “You mean the next time I win,” the elder goads.

              “Sure. You win and I’ll give you a kiss.” Oh Seven, the words coming out of his mouth. “But if I win, you kiss me.”

              That grin, unlike before, holds a hint of sincerity that causes Jamil’s heart to stutter. “Sounds like a bet to me.”

              The gap between them vanishes with the housewarden looming over the underclassman. Hot breath ghosts his face, but Jamil’s own lungs fail to function.

              “Until then, you better sharpen those fangs, Little Snake.”

              Excitement pulls at the corner of his lips. “Big Kitty better take his own advice. It’d be a shame to neglect my warning about playing with snakes.”

              “Oh, don’t worry.”

              That tongue across his lips instantly snipes Jamil’s gaze.

              “I plan to make the most of my new plaything.”

~~~~~

Nova’s Twisted Wonderland Masterlist

[chifuyusfingers]

Dad! JJK boys reaction to your baby kicking for the first time.

Gojo

Letting out a cry of pain from the weird feeling, you woke up from your sleep, sitting up heavily breathing, you clutched your arms around your pregnant belly softly not to hurt the baby. Hugging it and cooling down your breathing, trying to comprehend what has just happened.

Many paranoic thoughts filling your mind. Is something wrong? Did something happen to the baby? Thinking about the worst scenarios, another one of those weird tumbling motions occurred in your swollen belly. Bending down to place your ear on the top of your belly of 5 months, you caressed it, trying to feel the twitches again.

Looking to the side, you placed your hands on your sleeping husband gojo, gently shaking him to wake him up.

His sleepy eyes slowly opening, trying to get used to the darkness in the room. Mhm, what is it, baby? Did something happen? Why did you wake me up for?“ hardly understandable mumbles left his mouth as he laid in his place, not moving a bit, still not woken up.

"Toru, I think that… the baby just kicked.“ swiftly sitting up after those words came out of your mouth, his widened eyes in shock. "Really? Did the baby kick? Oh my-"

Gojo did the same thing as you did, laying his head on your belly, his hands wrapping around your bottom, trying to feel anything. And as the baby kicked again, your belly moving softly under his head.

Gojo almost jumped out of his place in amazement as he felt that. "Oh holy Y/N, that was- -your belly just moved, I felt it. Oh my God your baby just moved.“

Tugging up your top to expose your baby bump, he planted kisses on it, still astonished from the new feeling of a baby moving inside your body. "My baby? It’s your baby too, it’s our baby and it moved, Toru.“

You both giggled at the new feeling, it all felt so real, now that you could really feel your baby. "Come on, let’s get back to sleep, you have to rest.“

Going back to sleep, he spooned you from behind, his arm embracing you close to him, caressing your baby bump until you fell asleep again.

Yuji

"Y/N do you know where is the bottle of the vinegar?“ Yuji shouted for you to hear, rummaging all over the kitchen, trying to find the liquid he was looking for.

You were laying on the couch, resting with a book in your hands, since any excessive movement made your pregnant body tired.

One eye on the pages of the book, the second one looking out for your husband Yuji who was cooking you two a meal, making sure he didn’t hurt himself or mess something up.

Even though Yuji was a good cook, he was a bit clumsy so occasional cuts on his fingers weren’t that occasional. Suddenly a dull pain hit your belly, causing you to cry in pain, wrapping your arms around your swollen belly.

As Yuji heard your painful whimpers, he dropped the knife he was holding, cutting his finger slightly, but that wasn’t what he cared for, immediately running over to you.

"Y/N Are you okay? What’s going on? Is there something wrong?“ kneeling in front of you, letting his hands fall onto your knees. Your head lowered down, trying to overcome the pain that hit your ribs and abdomen.

" I don’t- don’t know, it just suddenly started to hurt so much.“ his worried expression turned into a soft one in a blink of an eye. " Isn’t it… our baby kicking?“

Getting the pieces of information that flowed through your brain together, you realised that Yuji might have a point.

"Aww Y/N, I’m so sorry for what our baby is putting through, come on lay down, I’m gonna bandage my finger, and I’ll give you a massage, maybe it’ll relieve stress, what do you think?“ nodding you laid down, still not over the pain your baby just gave you.

Yuji ran back to the kitchen for a second, rummaging over the boxes of medicaments and this type of stuff, trying to find a plaster to wrap his finger in before going back to you and sitting on the couch. He laid your head on his lap, his hands massaging your stiff shoulders in circular motions while singing to you, trying to help you relax.

Megumi

The weekend always meant Megumi well-deserved rest. Usually, the two of you spent a weekend together in bed, lazily cuddling and watching series you abandoned throughout the week. Today was not any different.

Laying in the bed under piles of comforter, you nuzzled your back into Megumi’s chest, letting out small mewls at how comfortable his presence was. Ever since you got pregnant, Megumi treated you like the most fragile crystal vase in this world.

His arm wrapped around your baby bump protectively, the other arm laid under your head. Watching the characters move on the screen of your notebook, your attention fully captivated.

You were on the edge, almost not breathing from the unexpected plot twist, when your swollen belly twitched lightly. Frowning your eyebrows at the weird feeling, it was as if butterflies were flying in your stomach.

But the nervous twitches did not stop, yet, they only intensified. You remembered an article you read a month ago, about how to distinguish when a baby kicks or moves. Concentrating more on the feeling, it was the same as described in the article.

Turning around to look at Megumi, his eyes closed as he was probably napping. Shaking his shoulders to wake him up, he opened his sleepy eyes. " Megumi“ humming tiredly, he tried hard not to knock out, but listen to what you had to say.

" I think our baby moved“ His no longer sleepy eyes opened widely, looking at you with excitement. "Really? How does it feel? Oh I can’t even imagine it, let me touch.“

His loosened grip around your belly now tightened, his hand roaming all over your belly, trying to feel anything. "But I don’t feel anything Y/N.“ he looked at you sadly, for not being able to feel his child kick.

"It’s because the baby stopped moving, Megumi I’ll tell you the next time it moves.“ He nodded dejectedly and laid back down, holding you close to him as you two resumed the series while waiting patiently for your baby to move.

Nanami

"That’s him, that’s the guy. The guy with the black hat is the killer!“ shouted gojo as the aforementioned character of the movie you were watching appeared on the screen.

" I swear try to do this once again and you’ll be the one left out when we have the next movie night.“

Switching between the channels you turned the TV off and decided to rather talk together since nothing watchable was on. You listened to the men who was talking about his next week’s schedule.

Laughing at some of the sarcastic remarks your husband Nanami made, you comfortably positioned yourself on Nanami’s laps, his strong arms keeping you close and wrapping around your baby bump protectively.

It was as if your baby reacted to the feeling of his dad’s hands when you felt some weird twitches and tumbles. Shrugging your eyebrows at the weird feelings you supposed was the baby kicking, you lightly bent forward, your fingers circling over your bump, occasionally poking it to get another reaction from the baby.

"Is something wrong, Y/N?“ queried your husband Nanami, catching the attention of gojo, who stopped in his convo, instead diverting his attention to you.

"-I think our baby moved…“ as soon as the words left your mouth, gojo jumped out from his seat, coming over to you and immediately placing his hands on your belly out of curiosity, leaving you and Nanami speechless as the men tried to feel your baby moving.

"Get your hands off my wife’s bump, you’re irrelevant right now. Her dad should be the first one to feel her kick, her uncle is further in the line. Make your own child.“

Getou

Having to deal with pregnancy was hard, but having to deal with pregnancy when your partner couldn’t be present all the time, was even harder.

When you got pregnant Getou made sure to be there for you as much as he could.

Coming out of your shared bedroom, you yawned, still not completely woken up from your night sleep. Picking some milk out of the fridge to cook oats in, you made yourself oatmeal with fruit and a cup of coffee to eat for breakfast.

Digging your spoon into the bowl, you couldn’t get yourself to have a bite. Your stomach feeling somehow heavy. It wasn’t like the morning nausea you had in the first trimester, it was just a bad feeling as if someone was squeezing your stomach.

You at least drank the coffee as you sat down on the couch in your living room, turning the TV on to listen to watch some news. You caressed your baby bump out of a habit, it was almost like a routine, every morning when you and Getou watched the news, he’d always caress your belly.

Sipping on your coffee, you felt a sharp kick to your ribs and stomach, spilling the coffee all over your clothes. You shrugged your eyebrows, mouth wide opened as you tried to hold back your tears from the sharp and tingling pain.

"I’ve been carrying you for over 5 months and this is how you repay me with your first kick?“ Saying playfully to your baby even though you knew it can’t hear you, you couldn’t help but smile at the precious feeling of your baby kicking even though it was painful.

'I should probably say this to Getou, he’d be happy to know that our baby kicks’ you said to yourself as you picked your phone and dialled his phone number, hoping that he’d be able to pick up.

"Good morning love.“ you subconsciously smiled at his sweet voice as he called you the pet name he often used.

"Getou, our prince kicked me. It hurts like hell, he’s a strong boy, he must be taking after his daddy.“ you could feel the regret in his voice at not being able to be there when your baby kicked for the first time.

"Really?I’m so sorry that I couldn’t be there when he kicked for the first time, wait for me I’m home soon“

Toji

Chopping some pepper bells, onions and tomatoes, you put the aforementioned vegetables into a pot, pouring a bit of oil and letting it roast on a low heat as you poured some vegetable broth onto it afterwards.

Looking up to see your partner Toji enter the kitchen with no t-shirt, his sweatpants long hanging as he rubbed his sleepy eyes, from having to wake up after coming home late.

"Good morning. “ He smiled at you beamingly, brushing his hair with his fingers and pouring himself a glass of water. "Good morning, babe. I’m so tired, my muscles stiffened as I slept, I must be getting old.“

Laughing playfully at his remark you resumed your previous activity of cooking, pouring some seasoning into the pot.

The sleepy figure of your partner Toji, disappeared from your sight as he got behind you, his long limbs wrapping around your waist as he nuzzled his head into the crook of your neck, whining out of the comfort.

"Toji we can cuddle later, I have to finish cooking, okay?“ He groaned in disagreement not moving a bit as his grip tightened around your '5-month old’ baby bump, running his fingers over the material of your top.

You were so engaged in cutting tofu, that you didn’t pay any attention to the feelings in your lower belly. Sensing some tingling, you brushed it off, thinking it was only Toji's fingertips trying to tingle you to make you stop doing your actions.

"What was it?“ Letting out a quiet 'what do you mean’ you continued not taking your eyes off the cutting board. "Your belly moved.“ Turning over to look at him, you raised your eyebrows, not getting any of his words. "It didn’t move.“

"It did Y/N, I felt it.“ Letting out a small chuckle you turned back. "Toji, I’m not going to stop and cuddle you, this attempt to make me stop is hopeless.“ as you cut the food, you suddenly felt a movement in your lower stomach.

"Wait, what, it really moved. Woah, it must be our little girl.“ tears fell down your cheeks at the new feeling, happiness overflowing your veins. "See? I wasn’t lying!“

Inumaki

"What can I get for you?“ asked the young waiter dressed in a uniform with the logo of the café you were in.

"She’s pregnant and she shouldn’t drink much caffeine, so one strawberry and one watermelon lemonade.“ ordered your husband Inumaki, before you could even open your mouth to say something.

Turning to face his caring and lovely smile, you pouted at him, for not giving you a chance to order something yourself.

"You know I can order for myself? And I didn’t have any caffeine in a week, so I could at least have an iced latte.“ He shrugged his shoulders, as he gazed around the café.

"It’s not about the caffeine right now. Do you remember? We had our first date here and drank the same thing, I just wanted to recall the memories.“ You smiled as you replayed those reminiscences in your mind.

"Who would’ve thought that a bundle of joy will come out of the single date, I can’t express how happy I am. I still remember that day, I was so nervous and embarrassed myself so many times that I thought you would’ve never wanted to go out with me again, yet you did.“ you smiled at his remarks, thinking about how he almost tripped on his own foot from how nervous he was.

"I did. And there wasn’t a time when I regretted, going out with you was the best choice of my life.“

As the waiter was approaching you with the lemonades, you felt fluttering movements occur in your lower abdomen. Onum noticed the grimace on your face as you lightly hugged yourself, but waited until the waiter left.

"Is something wrong Y/N?“ You looked up to meet his worried face. "I don’t know, there is a weird fluttering feeling in my stomach and it’s just… weird.“ You answered as you took a sip of your tasty lemonade, his gaze softening.

"Y/N, it must be our baby, he started kicking, don’t you think?“

______________________________________

Heya earthlings! I hope y'all are doing well~ And I was quite busy these days because of my damn exams, so I wasn't able to answer your requests but now that I'm here, I'd make sure to do it.

[pies-writes-and-more]

when they find you sleeping

pairings : Akaashi Keiji, Kozume Kenma, & Ushijima Wakatoshi, all with a Fem!Reader

warnings: probably some swearing but all fluff otherwise 😊

a/n: i love how they just got longer from first to last lol anyways I took a lot of naps this past weekend because it was a long weekend for me so I thought I’d write about it 😊 enjoy! 

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Akaashi could’ve sworn you sounded so stressed on the phone when you had called earlier. He had only imagined the worry in your eyes and he could practically hear you pacing in your room.

“Please?” You begged, gripping the phone to your cheek. “I promise I’ll make it up to you!”

Akaashi sighed, glancing at the clock that was in the gym, calculating how long he figured it would take him to walk to your place, “Fine. I’ll pack up and you better be ready to actually review with me! Not just goof around like last time,” he scolded you gently.

“Mhm! I will!” You told him, a smile in your voice as you hung up. Akaashi just shook his head slightly. The things he would do for you.

It didn’t matter that practice had run late and that he was starving. It didn’t matter that he really wanted to go home, eat something, and go straight to bed. It didn’t matter because the most wonderful person was waiting for him to come over and he would do anything- absolutely anything, to make you smile.

But when he got to your place, he couldn’t help but smirk seeing you on the floor. For someone who seemed so stressed earlier, you didn’t seem stressed now. There you were, on the floor, curled up and using one of your old plushies as a pillow, sleeping the night away. 

The boy just shook his head as he smiled, glancing around the room at the familiar smell of your mom’s cooking. He grinned, knowing that you had saved him a plate because you knew he was hungry, because somehow you always knew exactly what he wanted.

By the time you had opened your eyes from what was supposed to be just a small recharge, Akaashi had licked the plate clean and was going over the study material.

“Hey! You were supposed to study with me!” You whined, rubbing your eyes open with one hand as you swatted at his arm with the other.

“You were supposed to be awake to study with me,” he pointed out with a smile because you were the most perfect being he could ever lay eyes on, even if you had just woke up from a nap.

“Okay okay okay I’m ready, test me!” You asked eagerly, holding up your textbook to him, shaking your head awake so you could concentrate. 

Akaashi just watched you for a moment, that smile of his reaching his eyes as he just looked at you. He asked you some questions, going over some study material and both of you finding it easy to talk things out with someone else there. He watched you as the two of you studied, just glimpses here and there. He loved you, even if he had never said it before, he did. And maybe, if this exam went well, he would tell you.

Kenma couldn’t help but feel just a bit of guilt in him as he found you passed out on his couch. His eyes drifted to the screen on his phone, noting that you had been over for at least 2 hours now and he had only now taken the time to realize where you were.

You had shown up a few minutes early, beaming sunshine and all things perfect like you always did. But even though the two of you had planned this movie night for weeks now, Kenma just couldn’t find it in himself to leave his game yet. “It’s alright, Kenma!” You had smiled, noting his hesitation. “Go ahead and finish whatever level you’re on. I’ll set everything up!”

It wasn’t out of character for Kenma to lose track of time, especially when playing a game, but this time, he felt extra guilty about it. There you were, on his couch, hugging a blanket that you probably brought for you to cuddle under during the movie, with the TV screen now sleeping because it had been too long, and a bowl of popcorn that had gone cold on a nearby table.

Kenma tried to think of what to say when you eventually woke up. He didn’t want to make you mad, because despite his actions in the last few hours, you really were the best thing that had ever happened to him (Kuroo liked to remind him of this all the time). Maybe... he could just go back and keep playing? No that would make things worse... right?

“Ken?” You grumble, sitting up slowly as you notice his presence in the room. He jumped at the sound of your voice, watching you carefully, as if gauging just how upset you were. “Oh! Are you all done now? Can we start?” You asked excitedly, still smiling so wonderfully over at him.

“...You’re not upset with me?” He asked carefully, sitting down next to you slowly.

You gave a small smile and just shook your head, “I knew when I first met you that I was going to love you. Even if that meant waiting on you.” You gave a little laugh at his somewhat stunned face, giving a bit of a whine when you realized the popcorn sitting there. “Damn, I knew I should’ve waited to get it ready. Now it’ll be all cold.”

Kenma shrugged and pulled the bowl onto his lap and tugged you closer to him, “It’s fine, we can always make more. I’m sorry I kept you waiting.” 

You snuggled into him, glad that you didn’t have to imagine him next to you anymore, “It’s alright. But maybe next time, just warn me you’re still playing so I don’t come over too early,” you teased and his cheeks turned red as he nodded.

Kenma wouldn’t be able to tell Kuroo later what the movie was about, even though Kuroo thought he was crazy for not paying attention.

“Who doesn’t pay attention to movies?” Kuroo scoffed.

Kenma just shrugged, looking up at the ceiling as he thought about his night with you. “It’s not that I really like the movies. I just... like being with her.”

“Have you even told her yet?” Kuroo nudged his best friend, raising an eyebrow. “Girls won’t wait around forever, you know.”

Kenma just sighed, knowing his friend was right, but there was just a little something in him that made him wonder if you already knew how he felt. “I knew when I first met you that I was going to love you,”... you hadn’t meant love love... had you? The thought tugged at Kenma’s brain all day long until he had had enough of it. It was starting to effect his gaming at this point because all he could think about was you. That’s it, he told himself with a huff. I’ll tell her today and just get it over with. 

Even though he decided on it so hurriedly, Kenma still gave the words he would say to you a lot of thought. This wasn’t like a game where he could try again later. He had one shot at this... and he wanted it to be perfect.

Ushijima should’ve sent you home. He had tried at the beginning of practice, but he should’ve been more firm. He scolded himself a little internally, shaking his head as he kneeled next to your sleeping body, which was lying on top of a makeshift pillow made from your jacket. You must’ve been so tired after class today and yet, you insisted to Ushijima that you wanted to walk home with him like usual.

“Who is that?” Goshiki had whispered not-so-softly as the rest of the team started to leave the gym.

“Come on, Goshiki. Don’t you pay attention to anything other than volleyball?” Shirabu scoffed in response, glancing at how gentle the giant of an ace was being as he sat down next to you. “That’s the Ace’s girlfriend.”

“Girlfriend?” Goshiki repeated, as if he hadn’t ever considered Ushijima having a girlfriend. And he hadn’t. Because Ushijima always seemed so devoted to volleyball, it didn’t really cross Goshiki’s mind that there could be something else.

“Now now, children,” Tendō laughed, wrapping his arms around the boys’ shoulders, grinning proudly, “If you’re going to gossip, at least get it right. Y/N is not Ushijima’s girlfriend yet.”

Ushijima couldn’t care less that the topic of choice for the team was his romance life. He wasn’t even really paying attention as their voices disappeared from the large gym. Although, he had wished they would be just a little more quiet since you were in fact, sleeping.

“Y/N,” he spoke gently, brushing your hair from your eyes slightly. His hand moved to touch your cheek, an instinct that he wasn’t quite sure where it came from, but hesitated and pulled away instead. “Y/N, it’s time to go home.”

You stirred a little at the comfort of Ushijima’s voice, mumbling something as your eyes fluttered opened. “All done?” You asked, a yawn interrupting you half way. 

A small smile tugged at Ushijima’s lips as he watched you, offering a hand to you and helping you stand, “I’m sorry you’re always the one waiting for me,” he apologized gently, rubbing the back of his neck as he watched you pack up your things. 

“I don’t mind, Ushijima,” you beamed up at him. “It’s not like you don’t do things for me,” you pointed out as you watched him grab your bag from you, always insisting that he help you carry things when he walked you home (even if you only had the one item).

The two of you left the gym, the rest of the team still lingering about and everyone wishing their goodbyes. You gave a smack onto Tendō’s arm as he laughed about you falling asleep, teasing you about being a baby who needed a nap.

“Is that really what you get when you’re the ace of Shiratorizawa?” Goshiki was gaping, a little starstruck over you. Sure, he had seen you around before but you just seemed a little too ethereal for him to think of you anything less than an angel.

“No,” Ushijima interrupted before Shirabu could, not even bothering to look at his underclassmen. “She’s one of a kind.”

Reon and Semi couldn’t help but laugh as Goshiki blubbered out an apology, hoping the ace hadn’t thought of his words as rude or anything, but Ushijima just walked away, clasping your hand in his as he said goodbye with you to his best friend. 

You should’ve been more surprised that Ushijima’s fingers were now interlaced with yours but it felt so natural that you didn’t realize that it was such a moment until you got home. The two of you spent the walk home talking about anything on your mind, you even managed to make him laugh a few times with how silly or dumb your thoughts were.

Ushijima gave you a small smile as he handed you your bag at your doorstep. And for a moment, he wondered what would happen if he just told you how he felt right now. But your parents called you inside and you eagerly waved him goodnight, sending him one of those adorable smiles you always seemed to save for him.

So maybe not tonight... but he would come back tomorrow morning with scribbled notes on his hand about things he wanted to say to you and a pastry or two because he wanted his confession to be as sweet as you.

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