#saw the original post and thought of them

[moon-of-curses]

You are on the moon. You have a job to do. That job requires the other Guy, so it would really fuck things up if you killed them with a rock.

1-2 players.

The task is simple: go out and fix something. You’ve done it before, and if you make it through today, you’ll never have to do it again. That is to say, you’ve been out here for six months already and if you spend another second with this Guy you think you might snap. 

You have a task. The progress of this task is represented by a d12, starting at 1. When this die reaches 12 the task is completed and you get to go home.

You must maintain your cool. Your Cool is represented by a d6, starting at 6. If this die ever reaches 1, you snap and kill the other Guy with a rock. Please avoid killing the other Guy with a rock.

Every round, both Guys roll a d6. If both Guys roll less than their current remaining Cool, the Task Progress increases by 1. If a Guy rolls more than or equal to their current remaining Cool, their Cool is reduced by 1.

I was going to title this "If There Were Two Guys On The Moon", but I thought that having the intro paragraph be the full title was funny. anyway I don't know if anyone else took you up on the concept back when you suggested it, or if anyone else has done it here, but I did it a while back, never posted it, saw this, and then edited down to 200 words.

the original included an event table to roll on every round, but the main mechanic was always the frustration-induced/feeding death spiral, so I pared it down to just that. there is a small amount of the original humor still there, but mostly I'm glad I could keep the intro paragraph and "Please avoid killing the other Guy with a rock".

I am ok with this entry being archived off-site.

200 Word RPGs 2024

Each November, some people try to write a novel. Others would prefer to do as little writing as possible. For those who wish to challenge their ability to not write, we offer this alternative: producing a complete, playable roleplaying game in two hundred words or fewer.

This is the submission thread for the 2024 event, running from November 1st, 2024 through November 30th, 2024. Submission guidelines can be found in this blog's pinned post, here.

[immortalmrwavell]

Blake’s Billion Dollar Opportunity

(Original story posted April 7th 2022) This story has been Updated!

Blake was stunned when he found out he’d actually been accepted by Mr Henry Anders to be the new gardener for his mansion. He’d heard the rich older man was very strict and particular when it came to his staff. But when Blake saw a vacancy open up at the mansion for a new gardener on the team, he decided to throw his hat in the ring. After all, the pay was nearly ten times what he’d been earning up until now as a freelancer plus he’d get to keep doing what he loved. It’d be a win-win!

That in mind Blake never expected to actually get in! Applying to a job like that felt like buying a scratch card and hoping for a jackpot. You never think you’ll actually win the big prize. So when he saw the email confirming his acceptance to the job, Blake was ecstatic! He hadn’t even done an interview but they already wanted him to start the following Monday. It was a dream come true.

On the very first day he was greeted at the front gate by Mr Anders himself along with some other staff members. Blake was understandably taken aback by this. After all, he was just the gardener. If anything he’d expected maybe one member of staff to greet him and get him straight to work. Yet instead he was guided inside the mansion and sat down for a free lunch with the rich billionaire himself.

Mr Anders seemed to ask question after question as they ate. Blake figured they would be his skills and what his job would be like working here but most of the questions didn’t even pertain to the job. He asked about Blake’s family and life first before moving onto his upbringing and friends. Diving into all sorts of strangely personal questions for an employer to ask a new employee. Of course Blake thought it odd but went along with it just to make sure his new high paying job would be secured. Almost started to feel like a date until Anders stood at last and offered Blake a firm handshake while officially welcoming him to staff.

Not too long afterwards he was put straight to work. Another staff member briefed him on what needed doing as he was taken to pick up where the previous gardener had left off.

Scoping out the area, it looked as though the last guy had been half-way through a job when he left. It was fairly obvious with one part of the garden looking elegant and recently pampered while the bit right next to it was… not so much. Blake heard that the previous gardener quit very suddenly with zero notice. Some said he even left the country but nobody knew why. Well whatever the reason it had opened one hell of an opportunity for Blake.

The first week at the mansion seemed to go perfectly overall. That said, there were a couple weird things he’d noticed. For example Mr Anders would frequently come outside to see how Blake was getting on with the gardening. He’d always be so kind and humble, even having someone bring refreshments out for the two of them. He’d even bring a garden chair with him most of the time so he could sit and watch Blake work as they chatted. At first he just assumed Mr Anders was just a really nice person that liked to take care of his employees. However it didn’t take long for him to realise that nobody else seemed to be receiving this kind of special treatment.

Blake couldn’t quite figure out why this was happening for that whole first week. That was until the following Tuesday when it was particularly hot outside. He’d been sweating through his shirt so much that he eventually decided to take it off in order to cool down. Leaving it to one side as he continued with his work in all his shirtless glory. His muscles glistening under the summer rays.

Not long after Mr Anders came out to chat like he had almost everyday so far with a refreshing beverage. This time however he couldn’t help but notice the older man glancing at his hairy torso. Was his boss checking him out? Surely not right? That’s when Blake glanced down at Anders crotch and his suspicion was all but confirmed. There was a very clear outline of an erect cock pressing against his suit pants, getting harder by the second!? To say he felt uncomfortable would be an understatement. Sure Blake was gay as well but this was his Boss! It was completely inappropriate. Anders might’ve been pretty handsome for his age but the man was almost 30 years older than him!

Had this been any other job he would’ve wanted to quit right then and there. Truth is he had a relationship with an employer in the past and let’s just say it didn’t end well. Crashed and burned would be an accurate description. But this job was a once in a lifetime opportunity. It was far too good of an opportunity to lose. He was being paid more than he ever had been in his life! He’d be a fool to mess this up. And so… he stayed.

After that Blake’s second week certainly had a different feel to it. Mr Anders would still come out to chat or even just to watch him work from across the garden but now it didn’t just feel kind like before. Rather it felt as though he was being objectified. Watched constantly like he was a piece of meat. Eye candy for the rich billionaire to settle his eyes on whenever he pleased. As uncomfortable as it made him though, Blake just tried to focus his mind on the pay he was getting. As long as Anders didn’t try to make some kind of move on him then he could live with it.

Finally Sunday came again and it was a scorcher just like last week. Blake was a little more reluctant to take his shirt off this time but in the end he was sweating so profusely that he had no choice. Then, not to the young gardener’s surprise, Anders came strolling out of the mansion a mere 10 minutes later heading straight towards him. Blake assumed he was just gonna get eye fucked for the next hour or so like usual. Instead he was surprised when Mr Anders offered him to come inside the mansion. The older man said he was impressed with the work he’d seen so far and was thinking of rewarding his newest staff member. Blake was reluctant to follow the man for a moment but in the end didn’t think he had much of a choice. Besides, it sounded like he was about to get a bonus.

Upon following Mr Anders through the mansion and into a large ornate office, Blake immediately felt safer when he saw two guards standing by the door. At least that meant Anders wasn’t gonna try anything… right?

The billionaire turned and leaned against his desk, very clearly eying up Blake’s body. It was as though Anders was sizing up the man before him for reasons still unknown. Eyes wandering across Blake’s pecs and biceps before scanning over his bulge and legs. His gaze then returned to Blake’s face as their eyes met briefly only for a devilish grin formed across his face. The oblivious gardener was none the wiser to what was about to happen as Anders made some sort of signal to the guards. Upon seeing it, the two large men grabbed hold of Blake, restraining him completely.

“H-HEY! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!? GET THE FUCK OFF ME!” Blake bellowed, attempting to break free but to no avail.

Mr Anders simply stared at him with a hunger in his eyes, shamelessly rubbing his bulge while doing so. “Oh I can’t even put into words how excited I am for this Blake…” He murmured while stepping closer to inspect his shirtless employee. “You know I was gonna wait another week or so for this but after seeing you today I just can’t resist any longer… I must say those shorts are very well fitted aren’t they.” He licked his lips while unzipping his pants and allowing his cock to flop out.

Blake’s eyes widened at the sight. “THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?! PUT YOUR DICK AWAY!” The younger man screamed before threatening to get the police involved for sexual harassment if they didn’t let him go. Though it seemed his words fell upon deaf ears as Anders started pumping his cock before reaching forwards to feel Blake’s chest. “DON’T FUCKIN TOUCH ME YOU CREEP!”

“Oooooh nice and hairy… much hairier than I’ve ever been. And all this muscle too…” Anders murmured with a smile. His hands felt around Blake’s fuzzy pecs before giving his biceps a gentle squeeze despite the man’s constant protest. “Oh yeah. This’ll do just perfectly.” He bit his lip lustfully before stepping a little closer and taking a deep breath. The billionaire's cock couldn’t help but jump at the sweaty aroma protruding from Blake’s body. “And I can’t wait to smell that scent on my *new* body everyday…” He pumped his cock a few more times before glancing over at one of the body guards and giving him a nod. Next thing Blake knew, he had a needle plunged into his neck. Before long he was out cold.

———

Blake later awoke groggily only to find himself restrained and unable to move. He was bound to a chair in a strange room he didn’t recognise. All sorts of machines and equipment surrounded him but most notably was whatever weird device was sat atop his head. It was like some sort of metal helmet. He was quickly starting to panic when he saw none other than Mr Anders walk into his field of vision.

“P-p-please let me go… I-I don’t… I’ll give y-you whatever you want!” Blake pleaded desperately.

“Oh don’t worry. I’m gonna have exactly what I want from you when this is over.” Anders smirked while licking his lips. The cryptic response sent chills through Blake’s body. Anders massaged his bulge again while inspecting every little detail of Blake’s body. He was basically drooling at the sight before proceeding to sit himself down in another chair adjacent to Blake.

Anders let out a sigh of relief. “You know my original plan was to do this with my previous Gardener. Unfortunately he must’ve found out about my plan somehow. It’s the only way to explain why he left so suddenly… But I think I prefer you over him anyway…”

Another man dressed in a lab coat came over to help strap down Mr Anders into his chair. He then grabbed another helmet identical to what Blake had on his head and placed it on Anders. It and the helmet Blake was wearing both seemed to be linked up with some massive machine that sat idle behind both men.

“Alright let’s do this!” Anders announced with glee. “I don’t wanna wait another second!”

Of course Blake could only scream in protest until he heard the machine buzzing to life. Electricity began shooting through it and into the devices on their heads causing both men to shake and convulse violently. A small team of scientists watched on as the men’s brains were stimulated in all kinds of strange ways. Naturally this included the pleasure centre. The last thing Blake felt was getting a massive erection before having multiple intense orgasms. His cock erupting load after load and soaking the front of his shorts. After that, he completely blacked out.

———

The two were out cold for an hour. The scientists who’d been operating the machine kept a close eye on the two men and their vitals as they slept. Eventually however, Mr Henry Anders himself was the first to awaken.

The second he gained consciousness, his eyes shot open wide with excitement. With a grin he looked down at his body with sheer lust and joy. “HAHAAA!! YES IT WORKED!” He beamed! The sound of his deeper rougher voice was like music to his ears.

Looking down Mr Anders no longer saw the suit he’d been wearing but rather the very same tight shorts his sexy fucking gardener had been wearing. Only now with a huge cumstain covering the crotch area. But that was the least of his concern. His body… No longer did it look thin and aged. He was young! And he was buff too! He’d never imagined he’d have proper pecs but here he was looking down at a hairy pair sitting on his chest. He just wanted to grope them so badly!!

“Quick! Undo these restraints so I can feel my new body!” Anders urged.

One of the scientists rushed over to free Mr Anders upon his request. They undid the straps around his wrists and ankles before unlocking the belt around his torso that’d kept him pinned to the chair.

“Fuuuuuuuck this feels incredible…” he groaned as he slowly stood from the chair and stretched out his new limbs. “No more aches or pains… and I feel so much stronger…” Anders flexed a bicep before running a hand across the forest of chest hair covering his pecs. He wasn’t able to help pinching one of his nipples in the process, allowing a soft satisfied grunt to escape his lips.

“Would you like a mirror sir?” One of the scientists asked with a half smile.

“Yes! Yes of course!” Anders responded with joy.

Within moments a pair of assistants had a full body mirror wheeled into the room with a sheet covering it. They warned Anders that it may take some time for his mind to adjust to his new reflection and that seeing a new face may be disorienting at first. Anders gave an understanding nod before reaching out and uncovering the mirror.

”Ooooohh fuuuuck… This is…” He could hardly form the words as he stared into his new reflection. Looking back at him wasn’t an older man with silver hair. Rather it was the young and strong man he’d hired to be his new gardener. Blake. The man he’d been having wet dreams about ever since he saw the hairy hunk’s application to work at the mansion. Dreams about this very moment where he’d get to look in a mirror and see that handsome face as his own. “Astounding.”

His fingers began to curiously poke and prod at his younger facial features. The scientists were right, it was certainly disorienting. It almost felt like an illusion. But the rush he got from running his hands through his new much thicker beard easily proved otherwise along with every other inch of his new body. “My hair is so dark. Barely a single grey hair in sight… and I could never grow a beard that was naturally this rich before.” Each and every new sensation felt like its own rush. Every single one making him more and more excited to explore his new form further.

“I take it Mr Blake Johnson’s body is to your liking then sir?” Asked another of the scientists.

“Mmmmm yes. Absolutely. This body is perfect!” Anders exclaimed as he began to flex his biceps to the mirror. Loving how his younger and larger muscles bulged with so much strength and vigor. “Now leave me. I want to explore myself with a bit more privacy.”

“Are you sure? What if he wakes up?” Another of the scientists chimed in, referring to the other body that was still unconscious in one of the chairs. Mr Anders original body.

Anders turned to look at the sleeping body he once inhabited. “If he does, I’ll deal with him. Now I’ll call you back when I’m ready, thank you.” He said, still commanding the same level of authority as ever despite his new form.

And with that all the scientists and their assistants vacated the room, leaving only Anders and his former body.

The second the door shut he began groping at his hairy youthful body like a lust crazed animal. Starting with his pecs as he kneaded the thick hairy barrels of muscle on his chest. “Fuck! I just love all this hair! Feels so fucking manly!…” He groaned to himself as he continued to worship his furry torso.

Through all the roughing and squeezing, Anders started to get a whiff of that familiar scent he’d grown so attracted to over these last couple weeks. That sweaty scent that Blake always seemed to brandish on hot days no matter how much deodorant he wore. Only now it was coming directly from his body! It wasn’t long before It wasn’t long before he lifted up both arms in front of the mirror to expose his furry pits and the mere sight was breathtaking. Almost as breathtaking as the scent that emanated from them. Anders just couldn’t stop himself from stuffing his new nose into each of them and inhaling his new sweaty aroma deeply, allowing it to flood his senses in a purely euphoric way.

Of course his cock was already jumping to life at all the excitement and there was no way he was gonna ignore that calling for any longer. Anders reached down and grabbed his damp, sticky bulge. He kneaded at his dick through the shorts Blake had been wearing until he couldn’t take it any longer. He basically ripped the shorts off in a horny frenzy before grabbing hold of his new member, still slick and wet with all the cum Blake shot during the switching process.

“Now THIS is a cock befitting of a billionaire!” He announced proudly, noting it’s superior length and girth while smacking the pulsing member against his hand. He looked back towards the mirror, getting incredibly turned on at the sight of the man he’d been lusting for. Even more so as he turned his backside to the reflection. “And a billion dollar ass to boot!” He added, grasping both of his bubbly new asscheeks in all their hefty hairy glory.

Of course Anders wasn’t able to resist slipping a finger into his new hole and was pleasantly surprised at how welcoming and relaxed it felt. He knew Blake was gay of course but he hadn’t anticipated his new ass having already been trained incredibly well for taking dick. Anders would’ve considered himself a top before since bottoming never felt that great in his old body. But now? He was actually craving for some dick to fill him up as he fingered himself some more. Now going as far as to stuff three meaty fingers inside his needy hole. He figured he’d have to become more versatile from now on considering his new ass was essentially crafted for cock. But he still planned on doing his fair share of dominating in bed.

Anders must’ve been pumping his fingers in and out of his hairy hole for another solid ten minutes before he finally pulled them out with a grunt. He’d supposed he’d have to buy himself a few sex toys to help satisfy his hole when he was alone from now on. Perhaps a few dildos or buttplugs. He was getting excited just thinking about it.

Once he’d turned back around to face the mirror properly, He resumed pumping his cum covered cock while relishing in every sense his new body experienced. “Damn… my old cock hadn’t felt this hard and virile in years…” He mumbled to himself, having forgotten until now what it was like to be in the prime of his life.

He licked the cum off his hand before striking a couple poses in the mirror to see his new self from every possible angle. With every pose making him hornier, making his cock twitch to the point where it was already beginning to leak pre-cum again. Anders just couldn’t wait to shoot his load. Though just as he was about to start vigorously jerking off to his reflection, he heard a low grumble come from behind…

Blake was finally starting to come around. Right off the bat he felt woozy but more importantly his body just felt… off. He blinked his eyes open slowly only to come face to face with none other than a very familiar ass. It almost looked like his own ass?… And It seemed as though the nude man standing in front of him was flexing and posing into a mirror or something? What the hell was going on?!

Glancing down, Blake was even more confused to see that he was now wearing a suit yet he was still strapped down to a chair. The last thing he remembered was his eyes rolling back as he was cumming uncontrollably. Looking down he saw and felt that there was indeed a wet patch… but he was wearing his shorts when that happened right? How could he have soaked these suit pants?

He must’ve been making some noise though as he quickly caught the attention of the naked man before home. When he turned around however, Blake’s eyes widened in both shock and horror.

It was… himself!?!?

His face?! His body!? Even down the birthmark on his hip… BUT HOW!!!? He had all these questions swirling in his mind and yet his mouth ran dry. He was left simply staring agape at his doppelgänger, not knowing how even to begin processing what the hell was going on.

“Well well well. Look who’s finally with us.” Anders gave Blake the smuggest grin imaginable. He was so damn happy that the other man could be awake to see this now. “Enjoying the view?” He taunted, bobbing his cock up and down a little.

“B-but you…you l-look like…” Blake noticed the difference in his voice as he spoke. Older? Raspier? And somewhat familiar yet he couldn’t place why?

“You?” Anders finished Blake’s sentence. “Well it’s not really you anymore. It’s me.” He chuckled. “You see that machine that I had us hooked up to is a very special device. I’ve had a team working on it for years. It was made with the capability of transferring brainwaves and memories between two human brains. So put simply, it’s a body swapping machine.” Getting to see the further look of shock and terror on his former face was even more satisfying than Anders had hoped.

Blake couldn’t believe what he’d just heard… but it was starting to make sense. He was wearing a suit that was identical to the one Mr Anders had been wearing that day. His voice sounded different and older. His body felt strange and weak. And most of all he was sitting in front of what would’ve been his twin!! Yet despite all that, he still didn’t want to believe it.

“NO! That’s not possible! Y-you’re lying!!” Blake shouted in denial, his voice hoarse.

“Am I?” With that Anders moved to the left, no longer blocking the mirror. What Blake saw was none other than the face and body of the old Mr Anders mimicking his every move and expression. Still strapped into the chair as he was. He wanted to scream or shout or do anything!… but he was frozen. Unable to do anything but stare at the reflection until his own naked body stepped back in front of him again.

“Hey. Don’t look so down old man.” Anders placed his hands on his hips as he looked down at Blake with a tiny glimpse of pity in his eyes. “Trust me when I say this could’ve been way worse for you. I had to go through a lot of tedious legal trouble to get all my money and possessions transferred over to this new identity. I could’ve just put your name in a will and had that old body killed off after the swap. Would’ve been a lot less trouble for me on that front.”

At this point Blake was on the verge of tears. He’d just had his body and a huge portion of his youth stolen by his rich boss and there nothing he could do about it! He wanted to believe this was a dream. That none of it was real. Yet somehow it was. The unfortunate reality was that the thick cock he used to own was now being smacked against his now much older face

“You know I could just have you thrown out onto the streets with no money or home…” Anders began with a sinister leer. “But there might be a way you can convince me to offer you another job here at the mansion.” Anders rubbed his pulsing member across Blake’s face and through his silver beard before positioning the tip right in front of Blake’s lips. “You know I was just about to bust my first load in this body when you woke up. Jerking a big cock like this feels fucking incredible… but now I’m starting to think a good face fucking wouldn’t be so bad either. After all, your new face is still pretty handsome for a 59 year old.” He squeezed his cock, forcing precum to drool onto Blake’s lips.

Blake looked at the cock he used to own and then up at his former face as Anders grinning down at him manically. What was he supposed to do? He’d already lost his body and youth. Now if he didn’t do this he’d be homeless as well! He felt completely defeated. But at the same time, as much as he hated it, he was sort of aroused…

Anders let out a wicked laugh as he watched former body open its mouth, ready to be used. “Good fucking choice!” He announced before shoving his cock down Blake’s throat with no hesitation.

After that Anders wasted no time jackhammering his thick rod into the restrained man’s mouth over and over. He figured he’d have to put most of the effort into face fucking his former body which he did at first. But after a good few minutes of having cock stuffed down his throat, Blake seemed to put a bit of effort into sucking as well. Somewhat surprised by this, Anders began to slow down the pace and to his amusement, Blake was actually starting to give him a proper blowjob! Even pulling off for a moment to spit on his cock before wrapping his lips back around it. Anders couldn't help but laugh as he watched the tent rising in Blake’s suit pants. “Fuuuck I didn’t think you’d be so horny for your old cock. Not that I blame you.”

Blake had no idea what had come over him. He hated what he was doing! He was sucking off the man that’d stolen his body but at the same time he was just so damn horny. The very same dick that used to swing between his legs just looked so tasty. Not to mention that coating of cum that made it even more delicious to suck on. He could feel it drooling even more pre-cum into his mouth and the taste was nothing if not divine. One side of his brain was telling him to stop giving Anders this level of satisfaction after what he did but the other side so badly wanted to swallow his old body’s load.

“Yeeahhh that’s it. Worship my cock…” The billionaire cooed, feeling himself getting closer. He couldn’t help grabbing the back of Blake’s head and holding him all the way down until he was shoving the other man’s nose into his bush. “Aww fuucck! You like the smell of my crotch huh?” He already knew the answer via the deep inhales Blake was taking of it. All the while trying his best to continue sucking and working his tongue around the huge leaking member.

After that Anders had finally reached his breaking point. He let out a powerful roar as his balls tensed. Blake knew exactly what was coming because he used to make the very same roar and hated himself even more for getting excited over. Surprisingly though, Anders pulled out just at the last second before a wave of thick virile man seed exploded from his cock, completely drenching Blake’s middle aged face.

Anders continued to grunt and groan as his dick spurted shot after shot until at last he was empty. “Wow!… I don’t think my old balls were ever capable of producing that much cum. These things are really something.” He noted while fondling his crown jewels. He couldn’t help but smirk yet again as he noticed Blake trying to lap up some of the dripping cum from his face. “Here, suck whatever’s left out of that.” He offered before putting his cock back in the other man’s mouth.

“OKAY! YOU LOT CAN COME BACK IN NOW! I HOPE YOU HAVE THAT NEW SUIT READY!” Anders shouted, knowing that his scientists would still be right outside waiting.

The scientists scurried back in only to be slightly taken aback to see that their boss had nutted all over his previous body’s face. And was still getting sucked! Yet they tried to remain somewhat composed despite that. One of the scientists ordered a pair of assistants to go fetch their boss his new clothes. They nodded and came back moments later carrying a brand new suit that was tailored almost perfectly to the size of Anders' new body.

“Right, I think that’s enough for you” Anders said while pulling out of Blake’s mouth. He left the man panting in his restraints as he marched towards the assistants in all his naked glory before kindly taking the suit from them.

He proceeded to dress himself right then and there just so he could do it in front of Blake. He yanked on the briefs and dress socks before pulling up the fitted suit pants that did well to show off his new ass and bulge. He was impressed that he people had been able to get Blake’s sizes so accurate. Next was the crisp white button down finished with a dark blue tie.

Of course Anders then couldn’t help but give himself a once over in the mirror again. “God damn I look sexy” He complimented himself before looking back at Blake who was still glaring at him with a mix of lustful hunger and complete disgust. “Okay everyone! I’m going to get busy reintroducing myself to the world. I want you to free our friend here and help him get cleaned up. After that, find him some new work clothes so he can get back to doing my garden work.” Anders waved a hand dismissively as he strode towards the laboratory exit, his polished shoes clicking against the floor.

Blake was powerless. Unable to do anything but watch as his former 31 year old body walked away in that expensive suit looking as hot as ever. This was his life now. He was a 59 year old man past his prime and still working for the man that stole everything from him…

———

Two Months Later

Mr Blake Johnson was now known around the world as the mystery billionaire that, for some unknown reason, Henry Anders had signed his entire fortune and property over too. What confused the public even more was why Henry Anders was now working for Mr Johnson instead!? There were tons of rumours and theories circulating around what might’ve happened but nobody would ever know the real truth.

By now the new Henry had gotten used to his name and tried his best to accept it. He was still working as a Gardener for ‘Blake’ after all this time. Truth is he could’ve quit by now and tried to find a new job but he just couldn’t bring himself to do it. He’d developed such a hate/love relationship for his body snatcher. Of course he wanted his body back but at the same time whenever he saw Mr Johnson strutting around the grounds in another one of his fancy suits, he couldn’t help but feel so hot and turned on by the way he carried his stolen body. Like it’d always belonged to him.

Mr Johnson still frequently visited Henry while he was working in the gardens. Just like he had before all this. Though now it just felt like he did it to taunt the man he stole his new body from.

Every now and then however, Mr Johnson would invite Henry inside the mansion and into his office for a little ‘assistance’ while he worked on his business. Of course on most occasions this would end with Henry under the desk sucking away at his former cock and swallowing its load eagerly. Other days would be Henry offering up his silver fox ass to be a cock warmer for his boss as he worked. Before eventually getting pounded and creamed inside of course. It wasn’t easy considering Henry’s new older ass didn’t seem to take dick nearly as smoothly as his old ass did but he wasn’t given much choice.

The billionaire always made sure that Henry groaned “Blake! Blake!” over and over again as he was dominated by his former body just to drive home the idea that if wasn’t his name anymore. However, on days when Mr Johnson was in a particularly generous mood, he’d even let Henry fuck his furry ass of his over the desk. But that was rare. Usually Mr Johnson just shoved a vibrating butt plug up his hole and let it do its magic. Unless he had a hot hookup of course.

By this point Henry was a slave to his former self. He’d already admitted weeks ago. He’d obviously do anything to get his body back but at this point he knew that was impossible. The best he could do was stay as close to it as possible and let it inside him whenever Mr Johnson felt like it. Though recently Henry had noticed more and more younger hairy men being invited to the mansion. He can only hope that Mr Johnson isn’t getting bored of him in favour of these younger men. Maybe he should start training his ass some more to be a better bottom. Sure he was coming up on 60 years old in a couple months but it’s never too late to try right?

Anything to keep Mr Johnson interested in him.

[hackerheartthrob]

Exposed

Matt Struniolo x fem!reader

This is from my old blog thought I would reupload it :)

Nick and Chris are live on Instagram. Chris sets up his phone so he and Nick are in the frame. They both start engaging with the chat. You and Matt are sitting on the couch, his arm around you, scrolling through TikTok together, minding your own business.

When you started dating Matt, you both agreed it would be best to keep your relationship a secret from fans, so even after almost a year of being together, no one, other than your families, knew of your relationship. 

Nick was getting up to grab something, and it caused the camera to move from its original position, causing you and Matt to be seen in the background. Chris, not noticing, kept talking to Nick, not paying attention to the live chat. Matt landed a kiss on your cheek, and the comments went crazy. They were going by so fast that Chris could hardly read one before the next one took its place. 

“Who’s that with Matt???”

“Does Matt have a gf?!”

“Nahhh who’s that girl with Matt😭”

“Matt in the background?? Hello???”

Chris quickly moved the camera so that you and Matt weren’t seen in the background anymore. Nick noticed the look on his brother’s face. “You look like you saw a fucking ghost,” he chuckles. You and Matt both turn your attention to the other two. “You good?” Matt asks as he approaches Chris. Nick and Matt look down at Chris’ phone and see the chat still going crazy. Nick takes the phone from Chris and ends the live. “Dude, it’s fine.” Matt pats the youngest triplet on his back. “Seriously?” Chris asks. “Yeah, we were thinking about telling everyone anyway." Matt chuckles. You approach the triplets. “What happened?” you asked as your eyes shifted between the three of them. Chris explained what happened while apologizing for what happened every couple of sentences. “It’s okay,” you smile. “They’re being way nicer than I would be,” Nick jokes, causing all of you to let out a much needed laugh. 

Maybe I'll post more stuff from my old blog idk. Please send requests <3

Likes and reblogs are appreciated!

[cursed-cube]

So a common headcanon/theory I’ve seen floating around is that when Okarun shifts into his yokai form, the personality shift he undergoes is representative of a “truer” inner self. I can see the line of logic that led to this, but the more thought I’ve put into it, the less I’ve agreed with the premise. And I’ve put so much thought into it at this point that it’s had to become its own whole post separated from the analysis it was originally a part of, so strap in.

Disclaimer: if this is your personal headcanon, I’m not here to try to prove you wrong or make you change your mind, I’m more so discussing this from the theory side of things and what I think will happen as the manga continues. Also slight manga spoilers for up to chapter 172 !!

So as the theory goes, the personality that comes out when Okarun’s transformed is a more genuine version of himself, where his yokai form removes his anxieties and allows him to act more confidently and openly show the depression and pessimism that’s lived in him the whole time. On a surface level this tracks, as being in this form does make him more confident, blunt, and he completely drops the formal way he speaks to people, going so far as to adopt a cute nickname for Momo.

I don’t think this fully makes sense for a number of reasons, though. Firstly is that throughout all 175 chapters that are currently out, I can’t recall any moments where Okarun ever acts in a way that would hint at his real inner workings reflecting the personality and behavior that come out when he is transformed. I could have missed something, of course, but when so much of Momo and Okarun’s relationship is built on them being their genuine selves around the other (more on that in this great video I saw), I’m inclined to believe that there isn’t going to be another shoe to drop nearly 200 chapters in.

To explain my other reasoning, I’m going to have to go into a little bit of a side tangent about Aira, and first I want to establish why I think comparing Okarun to her in this instance makes sense. So up until the cursed diorama arc, the only character that really has comparable yokai related powers to Okarun is Aira. They acquire these powers in different ways, and Seiko says Okarun has Turbo Granny’s “spiritual power”, whereas Acro-Silky says she gave Aira her “aura.” Given the contexts of the scenes these are said in I would assume they are meant to be two different concepts, however it’s not ever explicitly stated or shown how the difference there affects them or their yokai abilities, so I am treating them as functionally the same thing for this analysis. Regardless, the similarity between them seems to be that in one way or another, they have been left with the spiritual energy of their respective yokai, which allows them to transform in very similar ways. Their transformations affect them both physically in making them taller and stronger, as well as their personalities, with Okraun becoming less formal overall, and Aira becoming more formal in the way she addresses people.

Even though they are affected by their transformations in very similar ways, I haven’t seen any kind of headcanon or theory that the way Aira behaves while transformed is how she truly is or feels, which makes perfect sense considering her first character arc. From when she’s introduced, she’s shown to have a dynamic with Momo, Okarun, and her other peers at school, where even before she’s able to use Acro-Silky’s abilities, she’s pretty two faced. In chapter 51, Momo even says, “There’s our Aira!” when she and Okarun pull Aira away from her class and she immediately shifts to her more snarky attitude towards Momo. The manga makes it quite clear that the way she acts at school, and on occasion towards Okarun, is an act, and that her genuine personality is a little nasty and rude (which she is loved for! By other characters and audience members of taste). And with that established, of course no one put that much emphasis on how her behavior changes when she’s using Acro-Silky’s powers. She’s still the same person, her mannerisms and the way she speaks are just altered slightly, which is also pretty much how I feel about Okarun’s yokai form.

That being said, I don’t want to fully dismiss that the shifted personality could mean something, and in fact I wouldn’t be surprised if Okarun did still have some repressed feelings and pessimism from his time growing up without any friends, but at the current point in the story I’m not sure if I could see that being shown explicitly tied to his yokai form. As of chapter 165, Okarun gets his final ball back, and as per his end of the deal, he returned Turbo Granny’s spiritual power to her, and she left with them and hasn’t made an appearance since. Okarun no longer has access to his yokai form, but at this point he’s surrounded by friends, he’s confessed his feelings to Momo, and he’s even grown physically strong enough to hold his own in a fight without any powers. As far as what we’ve been shown, Okarun has developed and his life has changed so much that he doesn’t really have any of those reasons to be a pessimistic downer that he had before the events of the series. Not to say he has no reasons to be sad, of course, we still haven’t been given even a hint of what his family and home life is like, and I expect something will happen with that eventually. But with where the story has gone so far, I don’t see this theory being true or narratively compelling.

TLDR: There’s not much evidence going for this theory, and several things against it, so I personally don’t see it going anywhere in the canon series. The way Okarun acts and the feelings he expresses in his yokai form could still potentially mean something, so I won't completely dismiss it, but with where the story is currently I don’t think this theory being true would add much or be a compelling element of the plot.

[fictionfixations]

this is my first time hearing of this so i dont know if theres like some other context related to this im missing (or if this message just happened out of the blue) but i dont really wanna know either way.

^^^ but all points in this are valid (the reblogged post i mean)

i would like to at least hold out hope that nothing bad happened until it is confirmed (do not ask them what happened, im sure its stressful as it is) but that is not to say that i invalidate the people who spoke up because im sure they have their reasons too but we do not know what happened and we cannot know what (again do not ask what, we are not entitled to that information)

i want to believe in both sides. i don't want to end up being the kind of person who doesn't believe in a victim or is against a person who didn't actually do anything wrong, so im going to be patient and if nothing ever gets said about it thats fine too

do not speculate. what comes out of it could be aiming pitchforks at someone who didn't do what you think they did, or bringing out someone's trauma over something all over again because you want to know or you think oh maybe this could be why so and so happened

this is my own opinion, but id say to withhold any judgment and thought you might have on this until we get a confirmation. this is not to say that you can do whatever you want with this information after, because that is not true at all.

feeling uncomfortable regarding it is valid, im not saying you cant have your own opinions over it, id just prefer it if people could treat this sensitively, and with respect for the other members to not try to find out more then what has been shared, nor overly target people over something you do not have confirmation over

im sorry as ive been repeating points a lot, but ive seen people acting really disrespectfully to all the people involved in something similar to this because they want to know, but they do it with zero regard for the person on the other side of the screen

(this is more referring to people asking those who were friends to that person about it but it was a really bad situation overall, and they were attacking them when they didn't get a response out fast enough without considering that they'd just learned that someone they cared about was a terrible person and needed time to process that. now in this case its not fully confirmed but i really dont want to see that happen again.)

^ updating my response above, as there is a doc with information about what happened which i noticed in one of the comments on the original post. i just wasnt sure if something really bad happened considering the vague statement in the twitter post but considering its been spoken out now of what happened i can safely conclude that hes probably not innocent (understatement). (again, please do not hound the victims nor the hermits on information about this)

i just didnt wanna assume anything. this isnt to say that i didnt trust in what evidence they saw that made them conclude that the accusations were credible, it was just worded in a way that sounded very vague, and as a person who would like to see the goodness in everyone i tend to stay in denial about these kinds of things because i want to believe that they are not that kind of person, at the very least until its either admitted by the guilty party, or theres a credible statement from the victim

also it might feel like im understating things with how i describe them, thats my bad. i usually describe things in swear words but considering hermitcraft has a mainly young audience im trying not to and it also feels a little inappropriate over a serious topic. but it means i default to referring to something as 'bad' or 'not so good' which can come off as like im trying to make it seem not as bad as it actually is which isn't true at all. im just trying to be really careful about how i word things or what i say considering this is a serious topic but it means im not sure how to describe it so i end up going with what i default to outside of swears.

um. also please dont go asking for proof from the people affected nor the hermits cause i really dont think its appropriate and could lead to triggering them further. its also very personal.

i emphasize my point as a person who has also gone through bad things, and trying to look back through those old messages were really triggering and it was just not a good time. i imagine it was rough enough to get screenshots of what they did get so please leave it alone. they went through the trouble of sharing it in public, you are not entitled to more

and i get it might be rough to trust CCs after having your trust broken with one being revealed to be a bad person but PLEASE do not accuse other CCs of the same behavior. they are just as shaken as you that someone they thought they knew could be like that. please leave them alone, thank you.

PLEASE KEEP THIS IN MIND:

we, as fans, do not have a right to private information. anything shared with us on this is a privilege. please do not abuse it. the cc's could shut down and never talk about it if we overwhelm them.

also, please keep in mind that ONE HERMIT and THE ENTIRETY OF HERMITCRAFT are NOT THE SAME THING. the entire fandom is not 'ruined' or 'completely unsafe' because of the actions of one person.

PLEASE DO NOT ASSUME THAT THE OTHER HERMITS KNEW ANYTHING ABOUT WHATEVER'S GOING ON WITH ISKALL. this is not some big conspiracy, it's the consequences of one person's actions. they weren't hiding this from us, that's not how hermitcraft works, they truly didn't know. they probably knew as much as us about this, so making it an 'us against them' situation is immature and shortsighted.

ALSO, I AM BEGGING EVERYONE TO PLEASE NOT SENSATIONALIZE THIS. PLEASE DO NOT TURN HATING ISKALL INTO A MEME OR A JOKE.

mcyt'ers being revealed to be less-than-great people is not a rare thing, sadly, but i've seen it turned into a joke/meme/trend in other fandoms. this both minimalizes the actual people's/victims' struggles, makes the entire situation feel less serious than it is, especially to outsiders looking in, and makes everyone in the fandom look immature, petty, unable to take anything seriously, and genuinely harmful.

this server, fandom, and community are not dying, it is not ruined forever, this is one (major, i'm not trying to minimalize it) issue that we're currently dealing with. it will be okay. we will move on. this is not the beginning of the end. please calm down. i love this fandom, god bless all of you. <3

edit: doc has said on stream that we will likely get more information as time passes. like i said, this is a PRIVILEGE. we are not OWED information. please be grateful for what we're given, and POLITELY ask questions if you must. if a cc doesn't give you the answer you want, or doesn't answer at all, LEAVE THEM ALONE. THIS IS NOT AN EXCUSE TO HARASS PEOPLE. the hermits are likely just as stressed out as us, if not probably more so, so please keep that in mind when contacting them.

don't freak out, we'll be okay, this is not the end of the world, nor is it the end of Hermitcraft. we will be okay.

second edit: please remember that (at least as far as we know) ISKALL AND STRESS WERE NOT KICKED OR BANNED. THEY LEFT OF THEIR OWN VOLITION.

ALSO!!! VERY IMPORTANT!!!

WE. DO. NOT. KNOW. EXACTLY. WHAT. HAPPENED.

PLEASE DO NOT ASSUME ANYTHING SIMPLY BASED OFF OF OTHER MCYT'ERS PAST ACTIONS/SCANDALS. WE DO NOT KNOW EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED. WE MIGHT NOT EVER KNOW EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED. WE NEED TO BE OKAY WITH THAT AND NOT DRAW OUR OWN CONCLUSIONS.

[azaharinflames]

Yeah BuckTommy’s ending made me not want to bother anymore. I had originally stopped in Season 5, came back in Season 7 (didn’t miss anything SL wise because it’s all the same) and yeah no point at this point to trying anymore cause all we are going to get is more of the exact same stuff we have been seeing season after season. Nothing will change. People just need to move along to new shows. Only thing 911 season 7 and Season 8 did was reintroduce the world back to Lou Ferrigno Jr and now people are starting to look for him in other shows. He deserves it.

Hi, Nonnie! Thanks for the ask

I feel you. To be quite honest, I started to feel disappointed back in Season 6. Buck's post-lighting strike theory had a lot of potential, and 612 definitely made me curious and like I needed to watch what happened next immediately. And then we got the superpowers (which I liked, actually. 613 was fun), and then... nothing, really. Buck meets Natalia and, as much as I tried to like her... it just felt lazy, half-cooked, and extremely forced. Which in retrospect makes sense, as they thought it was the end and they wanted to give Buck a HEA, but... yeah, it disappointed me a lot.

But then Season 7 managed to capture me with the initial emergency, and then Tommy graced our screens, and... here we are. Disappointed once more, but now to a point where I just know to not give them more chances - for now, at least. And as much as I would love to be proven wrong, for the foreseeable future I'm afraid.

One thing is true: I'm glad so many people discovered Lou. I first watched him in one ep of HIMYM, fell in love with him, didn't find out his name then and eventually forgot by the time I was watching 704, fell in love with him in 911, and then when I saw someone recognize him post 704... things made a lot of sense in my mind lmao.

But yes - I'm very happy he at the very least can take a lot more fans from this. I love his acting and the way he emotes, and he just seems like a true sweetheart. Hopefully, we get to see him in more stuff soon, he's definitely shown he can make an audience fall in love with him.

My inbox is always open for ranting, venting, discussing (911 or whatever), and for opinions (popular or unpopular, hit me with it)

Take care <3

[highlynerdy]

"Wen Xiao had supplied a surprising range of documentation. Some of it was rather florid poetry with a lot of barely comprehensible metaphors. Some of it was anatomical illustrations. Some manuscripts purported to be accurate historical accounts, and several were straight-up pornography with no pretence to literary style."

a fanARTifact book based on this brilliant fic by @achray1

My first fanARTifact in a cdrama fandom and I'm in love with it. It came together far easier than most of my projects do. As always, see pics and read more below.

So, I have always seen these accordion style books in cdramas, usually covered in book cloth and often given to the Emperor, but it wasn't until I watching Strange Tales of Tang Dynasty, that I saw these gorgeous wooden ones and lost my actual mind. I swooned and immediately saved them in my For Future Reference Folder of Doom.

It's not a surprise that I have been absolutely OBSESSED with Fangs of Fortune for the last few weeks (sorry non cdrama friends) and reading achray's amazing story fueled me to finally give this a try. It wasn't until I was writing this post and re-reading the fic that I realized she said scrolls and I should have tried making a scrolllllllll, aiya. There's always next time.

My wonderful husband - always one to encourage my fannish behavior - kindly took time out of his day yesterday to cut, plane, sand, and round these covers out of a piece of walnut he had lying around. He made them bigger originally and I thought they should be trimmed down a bit. I admit he was right and I should have left them larger. Ah well, next time. As per usual with these projects, I did do the research to check if walnut trees are native, or at least grow in China, and thankfully they do so moving right along.

The ones in the picture above were clearly stained and likely shellac-ed, but I only oiled mine (again with walnut oil), and pressed them over night to soak up any extra. Just look at the difference after they'd been oiled holy hell!

I experimented with quite a few ideas for attaching the text: vinyl, carving it out (no. omg. no. Carving walnut is a nightmare. I know that now), gold foiling. But I finally landed on calligraphy on paper and then adhering it on the cover like the reference image.

I went back and forth and round and round trying to decide what the cover should say. My initial thought was to translate Achray's entire fic title but that ended up being way, way too much text. So after talking with a discord friend and a lot of thought, we landed on "妖性爱习俗", which *should* translate to "Demon Sex Practices/Customs" or "The Practice of Demonic Sex" which comes from this excerpt in the fic:

"She shook herself, and stood up, mentally running through a list of all the texts— literary, historical, and medical— that she thought might or did describe demon sexual practices."

To do the text, I input the characters into a Chinese Calligraphy generator to use as reference. I don't own a brush capable of those gorgeous points, so I drew out the shapes and the followed the reference to fill them in. I did this a few times because I first made it way, waaaaay too big for the cover. I unfortunately decide to use a water based ink which, spoiler alert, will come back to bite me in the ass later.

See that bleeding. Yeah. That's my poor choice of a non waterproof ink, very thin calligraphy paper, and wheat paste asthe glue. Which I somehow didn't notice when I was doing the test on my extra board.

I decided to try out making wheat paste for the first time with this project and while I really did love the ability to remove and move around the piece you're gluing, it did not like to be stuck to the lightly oiled piece of wood so I decided after I redid the calligraphy on slightly thicker watercolor paper WITH waterproof ink, I would just stick with the tried and true PVA glue.

Lovely folks helped me decide between upper right hand corner or center placement and I'm really happy with the decision.

The inside is a torn down to size piece of an 22 x 30 Arches cold press 90lb watercolor paper, because with all my fanARTifact projects, especially the books, I like them to be usable objects in the end. I was SO fucking careful with my measuring and scoring and folding with this project y'all and I think I deserve a cookie.

I only used one piece folded up because I wanted the book to be able to remain flat/closed when it's not being used, but I think when I try this again, I will maybe try two pieces? Who knows. Certainly not me.

After all the stress of the calligraphy and the glue experiments gone wrong, it was finally assembled and put in my press with copious amounts of wax paper to protect everything.

In conclusion, this was a hell of a fun project and maybe the fastest I've ever seen a fanARTifact come together from start to finish. But I suppose one of the good things about learning all these new skills from each one of these projects will just make them come together easier (???) each time. I would love to get a nice calligraphy brush, some Xuan paper, and some ink and an inkstone to try a project like this again in the future.

I also want to try a scroll (which this should have been), stab binding, AND dragon scale binding. But, ya know, one step at a time yadda yadda.

Thank you, @achray1 for writing such wonderful, inspiring fics. And as always, if you made it to the end of my long ass posts, you deserve a cookie. 💛

[oneinathousand]

I've assembled some lesser-known quotes about Peter Cushing and Christopher Lee, I hope there's at least one in here that most of you have never seen before, though the super-fans among you have likely seen them all ;)

Lee fancies himself playing Aragorn, the archetypal heroic figure of the piece - he would probably be cast as Sauron, the Satanic figure in Tolkien's Middle Earth - but he feels that only a Walt Disney feature cartoon could possibly do justice to the work.

-"Cinemafantastique" Vol 3 No 1 (Fall 1973)

I knew that Lee wanted to play Gandalf when he jumped on board the LOTR movie trilogy, but I didn't know he apparently originally wanted to play Aragorn! My guess is that once he got older, he figured he would be better as Gandalf, though of course he didn't get it. But Lee as Aragorn... if he played the part in the late 50's, 60's or early 70's, I could see him pulling it off, what with his swordfighting abilities. Did he ever comment on the Ralph Bakshi adaptation?

After the liberation of Germany, he [Lee] visited a number of the concentration camps, including Dachau, a deeply disturbing experience which, he says, provided him with such a close-up view of the charnel house side of real life that he is unaffected by anything he sees or does on the screen.

-The Dracula Scrapbook, Peter Haining

I have decided now to tell a tale a bit "out of school" regarding the relationship between Peter and Helen Cushing, especially since this is a lady who remains a bit of a mystery to most Cushing fans - like a figure out of an Edgar Allan Poe tale, considering the way Peter lionized her as if she was indeed his "lost Lenore." During the latter part of 1977, I saw quite a bit of Christopher Lee as he and his family were living in Los Angeles where he played golf (and made the occasional film or television movie of the week.) One afternoon, we were at lunch, and the subject of Peter and his wife came up in conversation; Christopher leaned over to me and said, "You know David, Helen Cushing was a bit of a psychic vampire in life; she kept Peter very close. It was as if she could read his very thoughts before they had them. They really were soulmates of the first order; make no mistake about that! I don't think Helen ever really trusted me where Peter was concerned - even after he and I had made several films together. In fact, Helen used to say to me, "I know you think you are now bigger than my husband don't you?" Well, I just looked at her, smiled and said, "Well Helen, I am taller than Peter you know." Christopher felt that Peter had such guilt - imagined or not - about anything he might have done when they were married; if for example he ever found himself attracted to any of the Hammer glamour girls; whom he worked opposite, it all was now too much to bear. On the other hand, Vincent Price responded to Peter's intense mourning with his usual brand of humor. During the filming of Madhouse, he observed Peter discussing ways of communication from beyond the grave by perhaps installing a phone in the crypt; Vincent listened to all this and then replied with that unmistakably deadpan voice, "Well Peter, what if she's out?"

-David Del Valle, "Diabolique" #16

A few of you may recall seeing a quote posted here from Lee calling Helen a psychic vampire. I tried to find the source for that, but I couldn't. Instead I found this other version, possibly by the same person, which seems to give more insight about what Lee actually thought of Helen, and it comes off as much less harsh on his part than the other one.

A while back, I looked up interviews about the making of The Legend of the Seven Golden Vampires, and I swore I saw a magazine or something where Roy Ward Baker, the co-director of the movie along with the Shaw Brothers, said something about Cushing during the making of it to the effect of: “He was absolutely miserable, poor bugger.” But I forgot to take a screenshot of it then and for the life of me I couldn’t remember where it came from, I tried to look through my search history but couldn’t find it. I swear that I saw it, though!

Oh well. Next up is a quote about Lee and Cushing watching Looney Tunes together for the last time, get your tissues out...

In the early 90s I worked for Hammer Films and was asked to organise a voiceover recording for a Hammer Films documentary. Both Peter Cushing and Christopher Lee had agreed to work together one last time. Christopher Lee had asked me to organise one thing: a television and a VHS player in a private room and to have some alone time with Peter. After the recording, I cleared the studio and left Peter and Christopher alone with the TV. They hadn’t noticed that I was still at the mixing desk so I waited to see what they were going to be watching. I saw Count Dooku and Grand Moff Tarkin sit watching Looney Tunes cartoons – each doing perfect impersonations of Sylvester the Cat and Tweety Pie – all line perfect! I can’t remember exactly – but I think Christopher Lee was Tweety Pie and Peter Cushing was Sylvester.

-"Popbitch" 2015 Annual, the quote is just credited to a "JH", but IMDB lists a Jane Hughes as having worked as an assistant director in the Canterbury studio where Lee and Cushing recorded their voiceover, so this is most likely her. I personally would like to believe that Lee was playing Sylvester and Cushing was Tweety because Lee said he was always Sylvester to Cushing, and come on, Cushing MUST have been Tweety, that character would fit him like a glove!

For this final quote, I'm gonna do something different and copy-paste a whole interview done with Lee by a guy named John Exshaw about Cushing a year before the latter died for the magazine Cinema Retro, the interview being put up on their website. The formatting on the interview is all messed up, so I fixed the apostrophes and em-dashes and will put the whole thing here for your enjoyment.

I find this interview fascinating not so much for what Lee says about Cushing, but for how it implied he saw himself compared to Peter:

I didn’t meet him until we did the first Hammer movie. I’d seen him. Of course the thing which I’d seen which impressed me most, understandably, was 1984, which was remarkable. He was wonderful in that… Live TV! [shudders]

Total dedication; and this is the answer to why Peter Cushing is an actor. Total dedication. Total! The most professional actor I have ever worked with. And I’m not going to say underrated, because he isn’t underrated. He’s highly regarded all over the world as a brilliant actor, and deservedly so. The record shows that… Also, one thing that we do share, I think, more than anything, which is more important than anything else - I think we share the same dedication, I think we share professionalism, I think we share the same feelings about doing the best we can - one thing we certainly share is the same sense of humor, which of course the general public is totally unaware of. If they knew what we got up to on the set in every film we’ve made… the imitations that I used to do… Oh, we used to dance together in the rushes, yes; me made up as the Frankenstein creature, a sort of, a sort of, what do you call it - buck-and-wing dance, you know. And in years and years and years he and I have shared this idolatrous love of the Warner Brothers cartoons, you see, and Sylvester, and Tweetie Pie, and Yosemite Sam. And I’ve always imitated them, you see, and he’s done the same. And we used to do that on a set; people used to think we’d gone out of our minds, and we’d make each other laugh. Sometimes it’s so important - in a way, it’s absolutely essential - but we’re both of us ice-cold when it comes to doing it, even if we’ve been been laughing a few moments before. And that’s a thing we also share, total concentration.

And what can I say about Peter Cushing that I haven’t said before? I mean, consummate actor, brilliant technician, and a marvellous human being. I’ve always said, you know - I’m sure you’re aware of this - that he should have been a priest… Because there is a great love for his fellow man. There’s an almost superhuman loving kindness in Peter, and it’s always been in there. I’ve never heard him say anything harsh about anyone. He’s also a deeply religious man. Those are the two things we don’t have in common. I’m afraid I do say what I think. I’m not tactless but I am a more direct person than he is. I don’t have his tolerance. I don’t have his gentleness. I don’t have his faith; I wish I did…

He is not an easy person to get to know, believe you me. There’s a lot about Peter that I don’t know… But of course, as you know, Helen died in the 1970’s and that is his only desire left in life. And it’s genuine. He has stayed alive because he’s a man who would never take his own life because that would be a great sin, and he has stayed alive through some pretty terrible experiences, you know. He’s had cancer, and problems with his legs, his hips, breathing, and all sorts of medical problems, but the spirit is unquenchable and the speed of thinking and the mind haven’t changed at all. I mean, it’s another cliche - the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak. The same thing with Vincent [Price]; mind like a rapier, both of them. Only the physical disabilities of getting old…

But he’s certainly one of a kind, and of course this business of staying alive, simply existing, which is how he looks at his life - existence. He’s only waiting for that moment; only waiting for it. And he’s been waiting now for twenty-three years. It must be terrible to be so admired and so loved and so respected but to impose, I feel, on yourself, deliberately, a sort of monastic seclusion which he seems to prefer. He seems to; I mean, you wouldn’t think of it if you saw him with a group of people but I think he prefers to be alone. I don’t think the house is full of people. I don’t think there’s many very, very close, intimate friends - but nor have I, and nor have many people.

Acquaintances, yes; admirers, yes - scores of thousands all over the world, people who feel they know him, people who feel that he’s a friend - all that. That’s on a professional basis; I think on a personal basis, I get the impression that he’s a person who keeps his life and his relationship with his wife very much to himself. It’s locked up in a cupboard of which he has the key. He doesn’t open that cupboard and release anything unless he chooses to. But I don’t either.

[sonkitty]

Okay, I read all 8 posts and then I went back to this one first post. I have gone over every cut for this scene. I have made my own images with their own brightness and increased saturation. I have logged notes for my own sake and general curiosity.

This puzzle is one of the most intense ones I've found shared by other fans, and it was incredibly difficult.

You have clearly put a lot of thought, time, and energy into this theory.

But you were the one who was tricked from the start, right here. You were set up. You found a very elaborate red herring, and it was definitely thoroughly set out to trap you or anyone with this line of thinking.

The irony, the joke on you, is that you were the one who was misdirected, and this puzzle even told you that.

I don't blame you in the least because I am very used to being tricked by the games in this story, so I knew to be wary of this idea and why. I also know what to look for and what questions to ask because of how many times I've been tricked.

I will break it down because this puzzle is just way too good to pass up. Solving it is an excellent learning experience on how to solve the really advanced puzzles in this story. This thing is top tier. Bravo, Crowley. I cannot believe it was solvable, but I should know better by now.

That person is definitely not the Metatron. It is almost certainly the same person the whole time, and the story did make sure to give you clues on how to determine that while very much deliberately misleading you to your conclusion, except the chess thing. The story wants you to find and play its own original game, Earthly Objects, not chess.

This puzzle requires checking things cut by cut, not just frame by frame. It is extremely advanced.

Let's start with where you started because the clues are there if one knows what to look for. Here is my version based on the first image you provided:

Here is part of the text you provided: "White hair."

White hair?

Let's check that a bit closer, shall we? Look closely. Really, really closely.

There is a little bit of white hair at the bottom, and as you go up, you can see that the hair is darker on top. That is a darker gray. It is not white.

Here, let's compare this exact cut with my estimation of the exact frame you captured with similar angles for the Metatron:

And just in case we think the lighting is too favorable even in the bookshop, let's darken the Metatron portion:

You know something? I'll try and match the original better. I'll crop them all and brighten the original some. Then for the Metatron versions, I'll lower the scale, cut off the left ear, and try to get a decent match on the darkness of our brightened person in the coffee shop.

If you don't see it, the Metatron's hair does not progressively darken from the bottom up to the top. His white hair is white so it rather follows where the light itself hits the hair. That was a lot of effort to even make the comparison.

The Metatron's hair is also very slightly longer just above the neck, yes, even if his head were bowed slightly. Here, we can find the slightly bowed down look as he and Aziraphale make their way to the pub doors for the elevator:

Oh, now we can also see more clearly that the white collar would have to be much more defined to match the person in the coffee shop.

Let's take a look at the human you refer to as the "slim man" from the initial cut with his phone lit:

In this lighting, his hair does look more white at the bottom and darker at the top.

He doesn't always look like that.

This guy has a blue bag, and because I do play Earthly Objects, I happen to know where to find him shortly before this scene.

In this particular screenshot, he is near the post and obscuring Justine.

Here he is with the screenshot now cropped:

Well, his white hair doesn't look like it darkens either. We're seeing him from the right profile. We just saw from his left profile that in the lighting of the coffee shop scene itself, that's what his hair looks like in that setting.

If you look really hard in episode 5, you can find him without his bag here:

You might still have trouble seeing him, so let me emphasize where he is:

If you watch the whole cut, you'll see that he is in Crowley's and Aziraphale's line of sight. That means it is plausible they know what he actually looks like already.

Now if you zoom in, you can see that while you might be able to find a patch of lighter hair from the back, there is enough of a gradient that it's like what we see in the coffee shop. The hair is lighter at the bottom than at the top in this lighting as well.

Another super subtle difference in the hair is that the Metatron's hair is a little wavy in the back. This human's hair is straight in the back and on the sides, not wavy.

The main reason this coffee shop scene provides this hair clue is so that you don't start making excuses once you figure out the other clues based on his apparel.

Speaking of apparel, here is the next part of the text you provided: "dark overcoat."

You can find that is not a dark overcoat in the image below with the white box I've placed below the credit card stickers and to the left of the OPEN sign:

The Metatron's coat reaches to his knees. The human's jacket reaches below his butt and above his knees. You can tell through that blue inside the coffee shop and near darker colors that the upper clothing is the human's jacket, not the Metatron's overcoat. You are seeing the separation of the jacket from the pants, and it will come up again later.

You also say "rounded shoulders."

I disagree and think overall, he looks slender here, but let's move on because there is still more to be found.

For the blue area near where one can find out that the jacket is a jacket, is that blue then the blue bag? No, it is not. We can actually then find the blue bag because we now know where it is not.

Here is the cut in motion:

Watch the area above the judo sticker.

If you can't see it because it is too dark, here is the a picture shown earlier for the part I want anyone interested to notice:

This time, look at the white box near the judo sticker. That is the blue bag. We have now confirmed that we are indeed seeing the same human we saw before this supposed switch.

It was never the Metatron during this entire cut.

You were most certainly set up to believe so if you didn't check the earthly objects that could be used as clues more closely.

Note the red shoes on his back during this cut.

...

The entire scene is like that. It is constantly testing you every step of the way.

For example, here is more text from the original post: "Well, how come we never see the slim cell phone guy again?" you may wonder.

I see someone already noticed the same thing I'm going to note. If one checks the scene very thoroughly, I don't have to wonder at all. You actually circled it for us even if you didn't realize it.

Again, it helps to watch the clip in motion:

Now here are a few cropped screenshots for me to show you where to find it in the exact same cut you circled it for us:

It is no longer lit, but it is still there. You can find it by its darkness over the shirt of the human with the orange shirt and that darkness extending out from the clothing.

This cut is also the one being referenced with the following text:

"Because he's facing sideways, we can tell that this man is not slender like the man with a cell phone and blue bag. The man we see now, in this photo, wears a long coat that comes straight down in the front. It's not a jacket, it's an overcoat."

Nope. You were tricked. Quite deliberately.

The sticker on the door just below the cell phone we just found is obscuring where the front of the jacket shows its separation from the pants.

Look further down near Nina's elbow, and you can see that the person in the coffee shop is stepping forward, so yes, his pants would meet his jacket behind that sticker.

In the next cut where you can see this person is when this puzzle shows you how you were just tricked.

This cut is for Nina saying, "You and your partner?"

That's why I said it's a cut-by-cut puzzle.

Let's take a closer look at this person:

You still might not see it, so I'll tell you what's happening and that you really do have to look extremely closely yourself, even with enhanced effects to clarify the image.

At the start of the cut, there is a small pocket where the jacket is meeting the pants just above the blue part of the door. As the person we are watching slides over to their left during the cut, this pocket is obscured by Nina's arm and so it ends up looking like an overcoat instead of a jacket. That's to help you know that if something is visually in the way of the jacket meeting the pants, it will look like an overcoat due to the limited lighting available and color of his clothing.

I'll box it from a video frame early in the cut, but I know you might not be able to see it because it's small and difficult to see, but I have checked quite thoroughly that it is there:

That's a jacket, not an overcoat, and the right side of the jacket is still obscured, this time by the door side panel. Crowley is giving us a clue here because we can see Crowley's jacket taking up a lot of space in the screenshot while also showing the red of his collar.

Still yet the next cut of this person in the coffee shop shows it more plainly:

After that, the clues shift to showing a gap between the legs above the knees.

The legs near the shoes are visible enough that you can see that the legs align with that gap.

But there's still more to this trick.

Here is the cut in full motion where you are declaring that is not a jacket, it's an overcoat. It's the part I said the jacket separating the pants was hidden by the sticker. Nina says, "You been together long?"

Did you notice the shoe moving over by Nina's left elbow? That's another clue. The Metatron wears baggy clothing. His pants run down to nearly his heels. This guy wears pants with cuffs rolled up above his shoe. You can't really tell the colors easily, but you can actually figure out that this pant leg over this shoe is a better match to the human than to the Metatron because it's too slender and tight near the ankle to be the Metatron.

Here is an image I made for reference:

I won't go over the rest of the cuts of this person in this setting where this trick is happening, but I hope you get the idea.

To close out the whole thing and even tell you that you were dealing with a red herring, here is part of the last cut of the trick:

That is a red light on one of the passing vehicles in a reflection passing over the red shoes on the door.

I didn't get the whole thing because it's long.

If you watch the whole cut, you'll even see the red of Crowley's collar again, more red lights, and red clothing on nearby humans.

I then checked the entire scene to be sure that such a red light was avoided on that window pane the whole time otherwise. It was indeed. I mean, looking at this post, there is technically a more subtle one than the type that I mean for when the human slides lightly to his left. I did mean something more defined like what is here. That's part of what I mean for how I'm tricked too. The scene waited for an audience player to check the whole thing all the way to the end of the trick to notice this clue.

If you go through the present day scenes where you expect to find humans on the street, you'll only find this human this easily in this episode. He's not one of the more easily findable repeats. He was absolutely set up for this trick into misleading someone that he might be the Metatron shown at this time.

...

But anyway, speaking of misdirection, let me leave you with a joke I found through trying to solve a different puzzle.

How do you trick an elevator? With misdirection.

The Metatron Misdirection: Nina's Magic Trick (A New Final 15 MetaTheory)

Part 1 of 8 in the Chess Moves Theory Set by @wistfulnightingale

**I believe it is new -- I haven't found it anywhere else.

Misdirection is a key element in the most skilled magic tricks. It's more than mere distraction, wiggling one hand while the other hides the ace. Misdirection in Magic means that the magician isn't "hiding" the trick; they are allowing you to think that you are looking at exactly the right moment, while convincingly focusing your attention away from the moment when 90% of the trick actually happened. Magicians Penn and Teller are quoted as saying, "The strongest lie is the lie that the audience tells itself."

This article on What Is Misdirection in Magic tells exactly how it's done. Check out the 7 Types of Misdirection in the article, or in my Chess Moves Theory Master Post. They're used easily and often in the final episodes of Season 2.

I think there might be a major misdirection in Episode 5 that set up the events of the second half of Episode 6, and makes sense of some of the crazy-weird scenes and out-of-character behaviors we see, both in that scene and later. But, it'll seem absolutely bonkers... so please, keep breathing, and hear me out, and please check out all the interconnected 8-Parts that help support my reasoning.

I include photos below, and I admit they're not clear enough to be "proof" on their own. But the idea itself would explain why Azi abruptly left Nina, and why Crowley babbled. Some of the other parts of my overall theory add some additional possibilities as well. (Interestingly, the photos are from videos that used to be available free on YouTube Prime Video, but have been removed from the Good Omens playlists in recent months.

In E5, while we were watching Crowley stammer, and listening to Nina puzzle out relationships, and when our belief in the Ineffable Marriage was shattered by Crowley's answer -- Nina was (without her knowledge) participating in the biggest Misdirection of Season 2.

I suspect The Metatron was already in the Coffee Shop. I know it sounds nuts, but I strongly suspect that Episode 6 was not his first visit. I believe that I can show you reasonable evidence (added up from here and from other parts of my Chess Moves Theory-series) that the Metatron made a "trial run" the day before, during this scene in Episode 5. Crowley and Aziraphale were each shocked to spot him through the window behind Nina. Misdirection made him almost impossible for us to see.

Almost. But I think he's there. At least, there's a guy in a long dark overcoat, who looks like he's talking to another customer. Possibly a coffee-confused celestial gentleman getting help from a good samaritan? Let me explain how I think it was done, and I'll show you what I think is the Metatron.

This screenshot (let's call it Photo #1) is untampered, basically what we see in the episode. Aziraphale was happily chatting with Crowley about the nonexistent pen of his nonexistent aunt's nonexistant gardener... Then Nina emerges, has "things to say" about Neighborhood Christmas lights (that's the moment in this screenshot)... and Aziraphale abruptly hurries away. Within minutes, Crowley is stammering as if he'd never had a moment's thought that he and his Angel could have a committed, romantic relationship.

How...? What...?! Crowley, really, dude, what the...??! (Please refer to An Old Married Couple for my thoughts on this!)

But when we take that same moment, come in closer, brighten and sharpen it, make it more vivid --

Photo #2. There. In the red oval. The white hair, the dark overcoat, rounded shoulders. The Metatron. We didn't expect to see him there. So we didn't.

Hold on! -- I don't expect you to be convinced yet. So I went through moment by moment. There are more photos. (I recommend that you also check the brightness of your own viewing screen -- it helps!)

Nina is used in the scene to perform a concealment and switch, a replacement (magician's call it a Change), and then a distraction -- A Magic Trick. Nina is a huge part of why we're not easily able to spot the Metatron.

Magic Trick Step 1: There's magical sleight of hand going on, even once you know what to look for. We are visually warned. When we first see Nina, as our Ineffables are talking about impossible French, she literally emerges from the shadows (see photo below). Remember, this is significantly Before talking about "Christmas lights" in Photos 1 & 2.

Magic Trick Step 2: If we do happen to look at the customers in the shop as Nina emerges, there's a white-haired man in line who is NOT the Metatron. Note his height compared to the orange-shirt guy. He's taller, and he's fairly slim. We can see his pants or denims, so he's wearing a short jacket, not an overcoat. He's also holding a lit cell phone and carrying a blue bag. I didn't brighten this photo at all. We're supposed to see this particular fellow. He's part of the magic trick, planted there for the switch, just in case we do notice a more significant white-haired man later.

Here's the same photo, brightened. You can more easily see that he's wearing a short jacket -- we see his legs as he steps forward.

(Pay attention to the man in the orange shirt. He's very visible with that bright color. In later shots, he stays near the Metatron, and helps us visually track them both, when both are blurred by distracting window reflections.)

Magic Trick Step 3: Next, Nina steps into the light. As she steps forward, she says, "Bravo! Just enjoying the show." Again, we are given cues that there's a show in play. She bends over to wipe a table, completely blocking our view of the slim white-haired man.

Magic Trick Step 4: The camara cuts to Azi, and that's the last we see of the slim man with the cell phone and bag. Presto-Change-o, Abracadabra! Like a disappearing act with a magician's silk cloth, or like Azi's trick for Nefertiti with the 3 cowry shells, the switch (in magic, called "the Change") has been made! The slim man is gone.

Magic Trick Step 5: When the camera returns to Nina, it's the first photo I showed you, with the Metatron in it. The man in orange isn't at the front of the line anymore. (Was he undecided about his order, and stepped aside?) We can see a sliver of his shirt to the left of the doorframe, just inside the oval, but he's almost entirely hidden. Nina's talking about the Christmas lights. "I have things to say."

It all happens in less than 30 seconds.

"Where, then, was the Metatron?" you may ask in disbelief. There's a big rectangular pillar in the middle of the floor behind Nina, just to the right of the line. There is a mural on it, so it's camouflaged. On the walls behind the pillar are menu boards -- we see them in the "How's your naked man friend" scene in E1. It's likely that the Metatron was behind the pillar, looking at the menu options.

"Well, how come we never see the slim cell phone guy again?" you may wonder. The tables at the far edges of the shop are never seen. If he sat down, especially at our far left, he'd be out of view.

Here's that "I have things to say" photo again --

That's when Aziraphale sees the Metatron. He's suddenly distracted. His response is brief, and odd. Just --- "Yes." We don't often see our Angel speechless. He walks away without another word. That. Is another out of character moment. He's gone from his "I'm having so much fun doing this" smile to the fake, nervous mask he puts on for the Archangels.

His eyes are wide and his expression frozen, until it fades into worry as he walks away. Azi nervously checks behind him for Crowley. Hoping he'll follow, away from danger.

Crowley hasn't spotted the Metatron yet. It's not until he starts to follow Azi, then stops for Nina, that he's at the right angle to see him. When Nina says, "You been together long?" Crowley's completely distracted. He just noticed the Metatron.

"Who?" he ridiculously asks. This made zero sense -- Azi was just here! However, on our far right, over her shoulder, we can see the Metatron, facing sideways towards our right. He and the orange-shirt man are on the far right, positioned as if talking to each other (maybe he's asking how this coffee-selection-thing works?).

Because he's facing sideways, we can tell that this man is not slender like the man with a cell phone and blue bag. The man we see now, in this photo, wears a long coat that comes straight down in the front. It's not a jacket, it's an overcoat.

The Metatron is almost the same height as the orange-shirt man. His dark coat nearly makes him invisible as the reflections in the window break up his outline and blur the orange-shirt man. The two have stepped back from the counter, closer to us. We can see his rounded back, white collar and hair.

Short height, rounded back, long overcoat, white collar. NOT the same as the first man we saw. That's why I believe we're seeing the Metatron. That, and Aziraphale and Crowley's strange behaviors.

When you look closely at Crowley, he's staring intently into the coffee shop window as Nina asks her question. His head is not at the same angle when he returns his focus to her. It's not just the cute little neck scrunch -- he literally turned his head slightly to his right to look at her and answer her question. Crowley is concentrating on what he saw inside, and is mentally scrambling.

After Crowley says, "Who?" the camera returns to Nina. "You and your partner," she clarifies. Meanwhile, the Metatron has turned and is now standing at the end of the coffee line.

You can see three men in line, facing the counter, with the orange-shirt man in the middle. He's the colorful backdrop to frame the padded shoulders of the Metatron's dark coat.

Nina does a lot of "patter" here, a classic magician's Misdirection technique. Lots of rapid, distracting questions. They keep our own minds as occupied as they do Crowley's -- we struggle to keep up, and share our demon's outrage about Azi as "a bit on the side!"

I had to do a lot of reduced videoplay speed, constant pausing the frames, and careful photo brightening and sharpening to make these images somewhat clear. There are also frames where the reflection of vehicles and passersby’s obscure our view. The distractions come and go. It's all designed to split our focus.

So I was astonished when I discovered that, in the moment where the Metatron is standing alone, not clustered with anyone else, Nina is almost looking DIRECTLY AT THE CAMARA. It's only a moment. It's the only shot I had, of Dozens(!) of micro-moments, where the Metatron is in full view, although still difficult to see. This is how it looks in the episode.

Here's the same photo, brightened and sharpened for definition.

There is almost nothing on the right side to reflect or distract in this moment. The lighting effects allowed a much clearer view.

Nina goes back inside, and has to deal with a busy line and a new customer, a posh older gentleman in an overcoat. One who doesn't know about human coffee shops or how to place an order, and who probably consulted orange-shirt guy for coffee-selection advice. He's confused, he's asking odd questions... She doesn't have time for this...! So when he comes back the next day, she warns him not to do it again -- "Order accurately and fast..." (For more thoughts on this, see The Metatron's Second Coming)

Meanwhile, Crowley stands there bewildered as worry sets in. The Metatron is dangerous. Why is he here? This could be very bad for them both, but especially for Aziraphale. Crowley's main concern in the conversation was to SAY NOTHING that gave away their relationship. "Just... an angel... I know."

(**There's interesting implications about the Final Fifteen if Crowley is concerned that the Metatron has the ability to hear him from inside the shop. Azi often gestures as if the Metatron could hear them from outside.)

Crowley leaves in the opposite direction. I wonder if he hung around near the cafe, monitoring where the Metatron was. That's why he's morose and worried when Azi returns to the cafe (see more in my post Ineffables In Check). Crowley is also now worried that Gabriel is actually NOT memory-less. Is he there to spy on them for the Metatron? Crowley aggressively tries to find out.

He'll do Whatever It Takes to protect his Angel.

Please check out the rest of my 8-part Chess Moves Theory Set at @wistfulnightingale to see how I believe all the moments fit together in this Life or Death Chess Game. The 8 Parts support each other -- I broke a massive idea into parts, and you'd need to read all 8 before you can decide for sure if I'm wrong, or totally bonkers! It's a crazy ride, and I'll be happy to have you along for it!

The 8 Chess Moves MetaTheory Set:

1 - The Metatron Misdirection

2 - The Metatron's Second Coming

3 - Ineffables in Check

4 - A Hefty Jigger of Death

5 - Nothing Lasts Forever

6 - The Circle Kiss Theory

7 - The Nightingale DID Sing

8 - Aziraphale's Jubilant Smile (Not the crazy elevator grin)

Also: The Chess Moves Theory Set, Why Chess & Magic?

[dailykeiji]

today's keiji is: keisou

[sassy-man-apocalypse]

Is this anything

[brethilach]

[thegirlwhorideslikeasamurai]

Thank you for sharing your thoughts! <3

To be honest, I don't know. The stories I'm reading and those I have read have a quite consistent audience that writes many (and even quite a lot of detailed) comments while these stories are being updated. But I usually read in other fandoms, so I can't tell if the demographic of these fandoms is generally more supportive of their writers or if these writers just know how to engage their audience. However, when I look at the stats of a couple of stories in the YOI fandom that started around the same time as CYHMH (summer 2022), I'm not so sure that it's just fandom demographics. Back then, there was one new story that had 10 chapters out with like 200 comments and I even saw one that had only 2 chapters out but already 300 comments. So, even back then and a long time before the movie cancellation, it was pretty much still possible to excite readers (For the record: I didn't look around for too long to protect my mental health, so the data I have to base my impression on is very incomplete.) Now that I know that many fans are very vocal about wanting more canon content, including some in-between-the-episodes stuff which CYHMH has in abundance, I'm genuinely puzzled. Having heard about the success of other novelisations and sequels, I doubt that's just about original content.

Interestingly, the movie cancellation didn't impact my stats at all. At that time I had a long-wished for uptick in engagement (supposedly due to the fact that I had resumed posting the improved & beta'ed version, but I'm not sure of that) and that uptick held on until about two months after the cancellation. It made me hopeful that I had finally found a steady audience. Interestingly, shortly after the eros-off ice chapter [about 2 months after the cancellation], comments and hits/chapter dropped massively and basically back to the low level they had been at in 2022.

The story has 477 comments (I'm counting the threads, not the total number), which is about 10 comments/chapter on average. From the outside that looks really good. However, a lot of that is from either readers who discovered the story later and made an effort to comment each chapter plus the success it had during the first half of this year. And don't get me wrong, I'm so happy every time a reader takes their time to comment on chapters that had been posted long ago because many readers seem to think that writers don't care getting feedback for these although most of us crave that. In many cases that finally got me the kind of feedback that I would have desperately needed to keep going in 2022, and if I had gotten that back then, the long break wouldn't have happened. Because no matter how much I appreciate these later readers (they're 3 in total, including you and I love every one of you <3), I also need some support and engagement when I post these chapters to keep staying motivated and not being on the verge of quitting writing again because just sharing them had made me feel so miserable.

Right now, there's still some engagement left. But knowing my experience with writing a series for my last fandom (before AO3), engagement drops with every instalment. So if, at this point, there is already so little excitement for my take on the ending of the show and my take on a continuation, I just know from past experiences that it will go down even further for the sequel. And for me, that really begs the question of whether I want to expose myself to another bout of losing my joy for writing and contemplating quitting it because I've already been there often enough.

At this point, I'm just at a loss about what to do. I feel like I did already everything that I could and it's still nowhere near enough: I did tons of research for this story, especially regarding Japanese culture and figure skating. I conducted a meticulous canon analysis to ensure that the characters are in-character and that everything that I add is a logical extension of canon to make sure that this story "feels" like YOI. I worked with a beta-reader because English is not my first language and in those chapters I've posted in 2022 it really showed. I respond to every comment and thank the commenter. And I post previews with little success, at least here on tumblr (not sure what the people on twitter do with them). There's hardly anything I could still try and it's not working.

Okay, I need to get this out of my system.

I have planned to post the sequel to my YOI novelisation in exactly a month from now. My beta said that the sequel feels like an actual continuation of YOI and a friend is even drawing a cover picture, which is just so amazing. But the more I think about it, the more it seems like I'm bound to regret releasing this story a couple of weeks later.

I won't lie. CYHMH had the total opposite of a dream start. I even paused the story for an entire year to get a beta reader because I failed to keep my audience interested and concluded that it was obviously bad. Or maybe it only did so poorly because it can't compete with other novelisations. I don't know and I don't want to know because if I learned the truth, I would probably shoot myself.

The story has 600+ kudos, but that's not reflected in the hits/chapter at all despite all the improvements I've made. The number of hits/chapter which had skyrocketed for a brief time span earlier this year (aka after I resumed posting the improved version) has decreased by 75% since June and hasn't recovered since. Often, I lose bookmarks and subscriptions within hours after posting a new chapter, which couldn't be a more obvious feedback.

I see this loss in interest also reflected in my chapter announcements and previews (not they had ever been great to begin with). Often, I'm the only person reblogging them because rarely anyone else does. On the other hand, my post that I would postpone the latest chapter due to the US elections was so popular and the contrast to the reactions when I finally posted that chapter was so huge that I wonder if people just want me to shut up and stop posting. To be honest, not posting would save me a lot of time and spoons because, let's be frank: writing for a mostly silent audience is just not it. (I have a little bit more engagement on other socials, but the downwards trend is the same there.)

There are only three chapters of CYHMH left to post. The story is at its climax and seeing the lack of interest and enthusiasm so close to the end is just so fucking disheartening after putting so much work into this story which I call my love letter to YOI. Maybe I don't write the kind of stories that inspire the majority of its readers to gush about it, but a part of me had been hoping for at least some people to be thrilled that the chapter was finally out. Or to be at least excited about the sequel. And I can't decide whether my writing just sucks that much to most people, if you're just silent because you only talk about my stories in some exclusionist fic club, or whether a sequel is just not wanted or needed due to the fandom being already saturated with that kind of story.

Would you guys prefer that I stop posting? If you really want to read my YOI sequel or just anything for that matter, I beg you to tell me and to support me.

[franky-y]

Kiss Kiss 😘

[moxielynx]

harry is too much of a loser to smoke weed lets be honest (i mean this very affectionately)

bonus

[driftingballoons]

Some creatures are more difficult to perceive than others