#save me sexy cult leader

[eepy-bells]

Ma'am those look heavy🤲🤲🤲

[hajimedics]

writing not one but two welcome home analysis in my google docs and reading clown's posts made me realize how a certain side of this community made wally so out of character. he's the most chill out of everyone in the neighborhood. he's an easygoing guy who's not good at reading/expressing emotions. he's so fixated on apples but not eating them. just apple. he paints slowly and draws simple paintings. he talks in a slow manner. he goes limp when hugged and doesn't get up when he falls. he founds joy in anything he or his friends do. he's not a sexy smooth talker who's lovesick/obsessed with you or any of his neighbors. he is literally just some guy. the average joe

also he really, REALLY loves his friends. especially home. he's very adamant about saving them. you can even say he's desperate. he doesn't understand "romantic love" the way humans do but his love for his friends is very true and genuine. to box it into simply "platonic" or "romantic" or "familial" kinda weakens it. he simply loves them extremely deeply, his bond with them is tight knit. he's not good with words or emotions but the way he reaches out to you in order to save them speaks volumes about the amount of love he has for them. he loves and cares so much about everyone and to see him getting depicted as a cult leader by the youtube community or an obsessed lovesick yandere by some tumblr people are just a bit hilarious to me lol. not to mention many of his traits can be easily seen as him being autistic and traumatized which just adds further to the stinger

I could go on and on about his character but it's reserved for another day in this google docs. anyways how's everyone doing

[gaykarstaagforever]

This 1984 Teen Titans comic was the exciting conclusion to a multi-part story where they were battling something called H.I.V.E. This was a cult of people in purple druid robes who led an international network of mercenaries and assassins, who lived in an underwater dome and were all named numbers. I realize that sounds cool, but it absolutely isn't.

They were started / led by some guy, but then he married a 22-year-old blonde woman who murdered him and declared herself the leader. And the rest of them - this band of amoral assassins - just let this happen, even as she declared "none of you matters but me," and killed them every time they "failed" her.

This is in the past tense, because as soon as Nightwing and Wonder Girl go down there to punch these idiots, the blonde woman electrocuted all of her remaining people, then committed suicide. She also built a giant red missile and shot it at Atlantis, but Aqualad grabbed onto it and turned it off.

The H.I.V.E. master plan was to 1) poison all the world's oceans, 2) ???, 3) PROFIT, so it seemed like maybe that plan was going to thwart itself, really. They only seemed to have robot guns and tentacles exclusively inside their base, and also an army of loyal commandos in purple gimp outfits. But none of these could operate or breathe underwater. And all of their assassins had already failed to kill the Teen Titans. Which, no offense, but probably should haven been their first indication that they really weren't ready for primetime.

I don't know for sure who was on the Titan team at this exact point, but I DO know that Cyborg and Beast Boy (aka Changeling at this point, because ugh) don't even go on this mission. They stay back at wherever-it-is-they-live so Beast Boy can have an emotional break-down over his ex-girlfriend (Terra, some girl with floating-rock powers and a bad costume) turning evil, while Cyborg yells at him. Then a woman with pink hair wanders in.

She tells Beast Boy he's hot, and this makes Gar feel better enough to agree to not turn into a green tiger and murder people. Which was his actual plan before she showed up.

Starfire goes on the mission. This happens to her:

...Aren't they all supposed to be like 16 or 17? What are we doing here, gentlemen?

There is also a guy on the team named Jericho, who has muttonchops, dresses like every "cool" bard in every DnD campaign ever, can't talk, and can do whatever arbitrary psychic thing the plot suddenly demands of him. I had to look him up because so does everyone else.

He is apparently the son of Deathstroke, who became mute when someone after Deathstroke slashed his voicebox. His psychic powers are a result of it doesn't matter. No they don't explain why he looks like THIS in 1984:

Aqualad is also here. With his girlfriend Tula, who is Aquagirl. Who is an Atlantean cave-woman, or something...? She doesn't do much besides yell his name, and her presence in no way stops him from talking about how hot but insane Starfire is. To Nightwing. Who seems fine with this.

Dick and Wonder Girl are both here to punch and yell exposition, and they are immediately out of punches! Dick spends a quarter of the comic in a tube trying to turn off robots, which he fails to do? Or then kind of does? I've read it twice now and I'm not sure even Marv Wolfman knew what he had going on here.

Raven turns into a black void to save the Titans from drowning at the beginning of the comic. After they get out to safety, she says she's used too much power to help anymore and Poochie's on out of there.

I mean, they DO have Wonder Girl, kicking people and talking about her upcoming marriage. Who needs the incredibly powerful witch? It's fine. And easier to draw!

The art is George Perez, so it looks great, even if all these teenagers look like sexy 30-year-old adults, and half of them spend most of the comic not doing anything. The costumes are technically awful but in that 80s way that is just wonderful now. But as a conclusion to some kind of story arc, this is as mid as mid gets. There is exactly one cool splash-page battle, and it means exactly nothing.

This comic might be worth $3.50 now. It was 75 cents when it came out.

...This implies we in 2024 value this slightly more than anyone did in 1984.

I don't think that's true.

[jenyifer]

Pit Babe ep 13 initial reaction

Okay let’s do the final photo review. Okay ep 11 10 12 weren’t for me but I think 13 was good. My initial rating has to be an 8/10. A very surprising 8/10.

I was EXTREMELY upset that the racing bl that I had been looking forward to was ABO I like race car driving in general so I really was said abo was gonna happen. However this show didn’t take ABO in the creepy ways I hate mainly the sexism and homosexuality of it all. Honestly it’s straight girl’s fantasy most of the time. As a lesbian I am turned off by the sexism and breeding 🤮. But Pitbabe was interesting and bearable idk if there are subsequent seasons will lean into those tropes but I hope not. I love the actor for Babe he’s extremely talented ep13 only cemented this for me. I really enjoyed JeffAlan, PeteKenta, and NorthSonic I thought they had a good amount of side character relationships. JeffAlan felt very natural and sweet. I loved the characters of Kim and Kenta just interesting. What I didn’t like was how clownery the plot was. It was a little cheesy hokey. I think the writing didn’t do any favors for Charlie either. Charlie is very V A N I L L A I don’t think it’s the actors fault. I’ve decided it’s writing. Although I think the motivation of Tony was cartoon villain the actor really brought the evil to life I enjoyed his portrayal of a cult leader really. Anyways let’s get on to the photo review

Babe in this scene is just chef kiss if people question can bl peeps act show them this. He’s hysterical to see Charlie again. I was worried Babe would just accept Charlie back or be Angry but this is better. You can see he’s hurt but so happy Charlie is alive and with him that Babe is healed in a way. Charlie was being weird but I think it’s the writing. So beautiful in his emotions omg.

Wow… the three of them beating up winner and NorthSonic uploading the video. So cool. Really these scenes had me sitting on the edge of my seat rooting for them. ALSO WE ALL KNOW I LOVE KIM. I’m on board with Kim being a third for NorthSonic. Kim is also very fashionable. He fits in perfectly.

A little fall of rain can hardly hurt me now

You’re here and that’s all I need to know

I’m glad someone died. I do find it poetic and fitting that Way died saving Babe very full circle. I didn’t hate Way as much as everyone else. He was wrong for what he did but… I feel like he had the bones and the actor to make a compelling rejected love interest. I do think babe always cared about way in a true friendship which was beautiful.

Pete and Kenta bad ass bitches getting shit done. I think Kenta might legit be Tony’s child. Like biologically. That would be a good twist. I was said we didn’t get any PeteKenta reunion in the end.

Alan and Jeff are so…

Idk they have very high chemistry. Jeff really feels like a person who hasn’t been exposed to the real world really and he’s truly trying to comfort Alan. To be fair Alan has been through a shit ton but he does feel that pain and seeks comfort in Jeff. It’s very sweet even though we get the sexy scenes for them.

Quick note is way buried at the race track or something?! Why is his grave on his own?! Way’s ghost is going to be lonely…. It’s pretty but still.

The my kid is sick and so I need to sell him trope is sadly something I’ve seen before BUT!!!! I enjoyed the Dad’s acting he seemed really torn about it and he never ever gave up.

North Sonic’s contrast pants and hyping up Kim was perfect. Kim being happy to watch Babe and Charlie is very endearing. I hope Kim and Babe can be besties who push each other. I know Kim isn’t a special alpha but I like the dynamic of him being the best human? Idk. He’s 10/10 I love him.

Idk why Babe is so shy about Charlie lol it was very cute.

ALAN AND JEFF’s BRACELETS AND SNUGGLING ONTOP OF THE CAR OMG UNDERSTATED MARRIED COUPLE THINGS

How beautiful. I really loved this show and I enjoyed the ending. I wish Pete and Kenta had been there but I found this very beautiful and meaninful. Babe and Charlie crashing Alan’s intricate date so they can be found family couples together gahhh I really loved the family aspect to the series it wasn’t super loud or overdone but you knew Babe Alan North Sonic were truly family who added in Charlie Kim Jeff.

Anyways I had fun idk what I’m watching next. I need to catch up on 23,5 or I’ll lose my lesbian card hahahaha but I am quite busy. If anyone has a suggestion for what I should start on next plzzz tell me. Other people motivate me more than myself hahaha.

[messinwitheddie]

Nny "Happy Noodle Boy has no plot line. It's just nonsense and venting."

Stan "You can work those things into a plot line. Hear me out--"

Nny "No-"

Stan "Happy Noodle Boy enters the demolition derby."

Nny "No."

Stan "Happy Noodle Boy saves the roller rink."

Nny "No."

Stan "Happy Noodle Boy buys a mail-order bride."

Nny "Stop."

Stan "Happy Noodle Boy goes on tour with Alice Cooper."

Nny "NO."

Stan "Happy Noodle Boy inherits a yacht, gets lost at sea then abducted by pirates."

Nny "No."

Stan "Sexy pirates."

Nny "Still no."

Stan "Happy Noodle Boy enters the big chili making contest."

Nny "Just let me enjoy my brain freezy."

Stan "Happy Noodle Boy gets abducted by the mafia and has to chew his way out of the trunk of a car."

Nny "I said I was sorry for stabbing you. I won't try it again."

Stan "I never said don't try it again. I said next time go for my jugular."

Nny "I went for your jugular. You grabbed ahold of MY throat."

Stan "Happy Noodle Boy accidentally gets roped into a firearms/ toy chihuahua breeding cartel."

Nny "I hate you."

Stan "These pitches are gold! Start writing these down!"

Nny " angrily sips on brain freezy*

Stan "Happy Noodle Boy gets his prostate checked."

Nny * loud slurping*

Stan "Happy Noodle Boy pays off a massive gambling debt by adopting a wayward teen, harvesting his organs and selling them on the black market."

Nny "If that's your endgame, you should know, I pretty much LIVE off these things. My kidneys are worthless."

Stan "Happy Noodle Boy discoveres he's allergic to latex after getting really heavy into BDSM."

Nny *chokes on freezy*

Nny *coughs/ laughs*

Stan "Happy Noodle Boy discoveres a new species of dolphin then hunts it into extinction. Happy Noodle Boy gets assassinated trying to blow the whistle on where baby powder comes from; it's dehydrated babies."

Nny *still laughing*

Stan "Happy Noodle Boy infiltrates the Vatican. Happy Noodle Boy accidentally shoves his egg head scientist twin brother through an interdimensional gateway and spends decades trying to bring him back to this dimension. Some of these are based on real life experiences."

Nny "At least 10 of these can't possibly be based on real life experiences."

Stan "Happy Noodle Boy joins a cult then becomes the cult leader and herds all his followers head first into a giant meat grinder."

Nny *laughs*

Stan "You have a mean sense of humor, Johnny."

Nny "You're the one making this shit up."

Stan "Happy Noodle Boy gets his groove back."

Stan "Happy Noodle Boy builds a Frankenstein monster out of the unearthed corpses of Princess Diana and John Lennon-- and together they change the world!"

Nny "Leave me alone, Boss."

Stan "Wait! I have about five more."

Nny "I'm eating my lunch on the roof from now on."

Stan "I'm telling you, Johnny, Noodle Boy's character has legs! He can go places!"

[There are probably dozens of spelling errors up here. I was speeding through this.

The BS I come up with on four hours of sleep in three days. There's so much else I meant to get around to drawing today (Sorry to anyone who sent me messages, asks or submissions that I haven't gotten around to yet). This one is for me.]

[g33se]

Playing bg3 right now. Got to the point with the druids and the tiefling city. A couple of opinions about the party:

Lae'zel: I liked her a lot when I met her first (competent, straightforward, my type of girl) but she's being very rude about the tieflings. Given that I'm playing a tiefling... well. Not keen on the way she compared us to cockroaches or the way she made the tiefling bow- granted the tieflings did have reason to want to stab her. So liking her quite a bit less now. Still, looking at her respectfully. She is hot.

Shadowheart: Never really liked elves all that much. Not super keen on the way she did a racism at Lae'zel as soon as we met her, but the moments of emotional vulnerability have me liking her a lot more.

Astarion: Stupid loser bastard. That man is clearly a vampire- I mean, look at the eyes/teeth/the literal VAMPIRE BITE on his neck and the ten thousand clues he's been dropping. Sexy of him to greet me by holding a knife to my neck I thought he was going to rob me. He's such a fucking idiot I want to jump his bones.

Gale: This man has bard energy. At least, the way I play bards. Also kind of single dad energy? Just a random wizard running around. Just a Dude, if you will. Had to put him back in the campsite since I'm a sorcerer and party comp will get fucked though.

Wyll: Thought he was a paladin at first. Then he started doing warlocky things. I like how he acts it's a nonstandard edgy warlock thing, I hope his storyline pans out well. Really like his back-and-forth with Lae'zel about ever doing nice things with her life. Immediately taken with the fight scene I saw him in first, looked fucking epic.

Overall, I really love Mind Flayers. They're fucking cool, that little starter scene when I converted a woman into one was fucking nightmare fuel. I did see the button saying perfect and press it knowing what it would probably mean. What the hell were they doing in Avernus though. And isn't Zariel the angel who fell because she wanted to kill demons with GREAT PREJUDICE?

I've also been save scumming whenever I steal stuff a lot because, habit. I just want to collect all the boxes and put them into the campsite. Also reloaded the same save three times because I wanted Asterion to take that one potato off a crying guard. (Probably going to try to see if I can do a revivify on the dead guard later? I don't know if the game has the 1 min timer on revivify or not.) Also I do like how yoinking just makes people do 'hey wtf' or 'you're getting arrested' because instantly trying to kill the party is. Weird.

Also reloaded the save once because I couldn't revivify Shadowheart because she died on stairs that were on fire. I know how to play dnd I just have a hard time conceptualizing it with game graphics.

Lower level dnd's always interesting. The take action to restore someone else at 1hp is also... inspired. Would be interested to see normal downing rules- that would force me to think in more dnd terms to play the game. I also keep clicking wrong and wasting attacks on the space right next to a person.

Weird how everyone can use scrolls.

I hate the 1/short rest mage hand it's a fucking cantrip and it can do, like, nothing. Going to download a mod for it later.

Going to have to use the speak with dead amulet a lot I hope. I love that spell. Not quite sure how I feel about your camp being a separate room- I feel like it trivializes inventory management and sending things there is. Weird. Where is all the weight going. I do like stacking all the boxes I find though.

Thought the Absolute people were part of a mind flayer cult so had to kill a few of them.

Current leader druid is a bit cringe. Don't want to kill her but definitely ousting her asap. Stop being a dick to my people (tieflings). Also really liking the tiefling responses so far.

Also wonder at the deal about the tiefling village. They seem to have a lot of hell stuff going on there.

Anyway, this is cool! Looking forward to what happens next.

[nightguide]

doctor who speeches as it should have been

9 to 10 regen:

'i can't even remember who i am' (end credits)

'i'm a little bit dishonest about what i am because i just came here and i (coughs out regeneration energy) and i don't believe.. you're my missus arent you?'

rose: well no.. i

10: well i don't even see myself either because what happens is that (points at alien at the background and says the name of that alien) is not trying to kill me but it's trying to kill you and i personally think that i should let you see it for yourself.. until i.. (flashes sonic at alien to check if it actually obeys the social connection to Rose to affirm her identity than the alien itself because the alien isn't on anyones side but is actually River's erotic carnage after 9 unleashed his energy to her in real life)

'once a cynic, twice a cynic, always a cynic Sarah'

'i don't actually see the world shifting in my view mirror either, baby i would spin your crinoline again to the rim of my heartbeat one more time (wink wink wink)'

'okay, first off lipstick hornets, i know you're pissed off at the wrong two feet because, A. your cult leader in the middle (mental waves 'hi' to skaro and mouths 'i'm sorry' to him physically) should not actually obey you androids become because you're too afraid of putting up (andrew garfield tries to speak up at the background but i shush him because he doesn't know who he is but to me (river) knows who he is so it's like a very sexy flirt at him if i told him to shut up because it's like River saying 'down, boy' and he obeys) your pictures up on the cloud (social media) so if you were to be your regular Johann Sebastian Bach of the new social life, then so be it, (strips off) take mine.'

(body of 10 in danger automatically becomes River's to sustain his life as his life might go to River in heaven if she were there to save him, she will save everybody with it)

i will put more up

[waylyngdraws]

my cunty culty monsterhearts oc

i, waylyng, have never played monsterhearts.

if you don't know what that is, i refer to the ttrpg based on all those supernatural teen romance novels; think stephene meyer, cassandra clare, all that jazz. it's a gloomy morning in the village, and you are a sexy vampire.

i made this character, however, because i wanted to be in my friend's campaign, and we each had to make an 'audition' character to see who'd take the last spot. didn't get it, but they're making a oneshot soon, so to celebrate, i'm showing you my character !

this is cassius (he/him). he's the monsterhearts skin 'queen', which, for the monsterhearts virgins among us, is like a regina george-style clique leader, whose power relies on keeping lots of loyal followers.

so, naturally, i decided by blorbo would be a cult leader.

he's been sent out from the "hub" where he grew up to tell people about the true happiness. do the popular kids not understand you? do you not understand when people talk about romance? do you feel like you belong in a skirt rather than trousers? well, you'll fit right in with Us. We will show you a True Community, and you too will feel the Love of the Thunderer.

(i chose the thunderer as the cult name of the god as a cheeky greek myth reference; bromios, the cult name for dionysus, translates as "the thunderer". i tried to find out what the cult name was for aphrodite, which is more appropriate, but like,,, they didn't slap as hard. looking back tho maybe should have chosen hestia though, for all the stuff about the hearth relating to community, and spooky death connotations. oh well. tangent over)

illustration ! religious ecstasy !

(looking back i'm not happy with the rim lighting, a bit flat lmao (like me—) and the shirt looks a bit strange. i will stop now)

here's a vignette i did as a "taster" for the character!

Who is Cassius? Don't you know?

When I say he's magnetic, don't think I just mean hypnotic — he's an obelisk, a monolith of cold, harsh metal standing far above you. You throw iron filings in the air, they fly straight to his side; such an austere exterior, why do they keep coming? It's a question they might even ask themselves.

The bell's rung, students are flocking to the cafeteria. You hear him before you see him, the hush of the surrounding voices, the rise of the mumblings that constantly follow. Cassius strides past, covered in his clique. You see the kid with piercings who transferred last week — they mustn't have fit in anywhere else. How easily they fall in.

They look so together, his swarm; all wildly different in appearance, but moving with a single mind. Like a flock of birds, they flow around him, so in tune with each other you'd call them a polycule if you didn't know better.

Through the people, you catch a glance: a wave of soft brown hair, punctuated by a shock of white. The school has no uniform, but he always wears a blazer. His nails, almost claws, a new look every week — today, they're black, dripping with molten gold. And of course, he's wearing that ever-present half-smile. You feel almost as if you could talk to him…but there's a chasm between you larger than words. You can't think what his life must be like. But still, to talk to him…how can you not try? And, trying, how could you not fall? i hope you enjoy my blorbo !! for my morally gray characters, i like taking a concept i really believe in, like community, and pushing it that extra bit too far. i hope i've accomplished that with cassius. he wants to keep you safe, he thinks he's doing the right thing, he thinks he's saving you. but. you can only be saved his way. enjoy !!

[ash-and-books]

Rating: 2.5/5

Book Blurb: #1 New York Times bestselling author Tessa Bailey delivers a sexy, hilarious standalone holiday rom-com about the adult children of two former rock stars who team up to convince their estranged mothers to play a Christmas Eve concert…

Melody Gallard may be the daughter of music royalty, but her world is far from glamorous. She spends her days restoring old books and avoiding the limelight (one awkward tabloid photo was enough, thanks). But when a producer offers her a lot of money to reunite her mother’s band on live tv, Mel begins to wonder if it’s time to rattle the cage, shake up her quiet life… and see him again. The only other person who could wrangle the rock and roll divas.

Beat Dawkins, the lead singer’s son, is Melody’s opposite—the camera loves him, he could charm the pants off anyone, and his mom is not a potential cult leader. Still, they might have been best friends if not for the legendary feud that broke up the band. When they met as teenagers, Mel felt an instant spark, but it’s nothing compared to the wild, intense attraction that builds as they embark on a madcap mission to convince their mothers to perform one last show. 

While dealing with rock star shenanigans, a 24-hour film crew, brawling Santas, and mobs of adoring fans, Mel starts to step out of her comfort zone. With Beat by her side, cheering her on, she’s never felt so understood. But Christmas Eve is fast approaching, and a decades-old scandal is poised to wreck everything—the Steel Birds reunion, their relationships with their mothers, and their newfound love. 

Review:

Two children of former rock stars have to team up to convince their estranged moms to play a Christmas Eve concert but might find love along the way. Melody Gallard and Beat Dawkins are the children of the infamous rock band known as Steel Birds, their moms were music royalty until the huge mysterious band breakup, and ever since then their moms have hated each other. Melody and Beat met only one time when they were sixteen for five minutes, but that one hug, that one meeting was seared into their brains and now 16 years later when they are both 30, they are about to meet again. Beat is being blackmailed, and has been blackmailed for the past 5 years and the price just keeps getting higher and now he's running out of money, he hasn't told anyone and if the secret gets out it could ruin his mom and his family's lives and reputations and thats not something he's willing to risk, but the only way to come up with the money this time around is if he accepts a tv producer's deal that he and Melody are filmed on their journey to getting their moms to reunite the band for a Christmas Eve concert. From the moment Melody and Beat meet again it's instant attraction, it's more than their 16 year old selves could believe, but Beat has a secret that he's afraid will ruin this friendship and potential relationship with Melody, he only likes being edged and only finishes alone, he doesn't feel comfortable enough to give himself to someone fully and prefers to just be edged. Yet being constantly surrounded by Melody is not helping at all because he's become obsessed with her and now he'll have to ask if he's ready to finally give himself fully over to someone, to let someone in and to trust them, with all of his secrets. Can these two find a way to get their mom's back together, save Beat, and work out the relationship between each other? This one was a lot if I'm going to be honest, it laid in THICK with the whole "Beat and Melody" are a pair, they are two parts of one whole rockstar kids vibe. Then there was the insta love (which can be great at times), the communication issues, and it felt a bit cringey at times and not enough of a cute Christmas read despite it being set during the festive time, it really did not read as a Christmas romance. Overall it was just a bit much for me personally, but if you like rockstar children romances mixed in with reality tv show vibes then give this one a go, maybe it'll be right for you.

*Thanks Netgalley and Avon and Harper Voyager, Avon for sending me an arc in exchange for an honest review*

[isabeauwolf]

Proud Villain Lover here! 😍❤️

Of course, there are some side or main character husbands I adore too, but...

Would they burn the world down for you? Prioritize you over saving the world? Take you with them? Fulfill any of your darkest fantasies? The possibilities are endless! They match your crazy and love you for it!

Hehe, just saying 😉

Give me my sexy Yakuza Husband Birdman any day 🐦‍⬛

The cult leader with long hair and a silver tongue

The smug assed, bratty King of Curses himself

The red headed Oni Yokai whose body is invincible as his fire and loves canned peaches 🍑

The blue eyed casanova, walking zombie man with a thirst for vengeance as crazed and hot as his blue flames 💙🔥

Yes, I'm thinking about Overhaul, Sukuna, Geto, Dabi, and Akura-Ou to name a few~ Wbu?

Idk why people get so mad when you find villains hot in an anime or manga. They don’t have to be a good person they just have to be good looking 😭😭

[are-we-really-doing-this]

What a fantastic fucking week, if only people didn’t suck (not you Tumblr people, y’all are my saving grace. Muah.)

ANYWAY. I’ve already talked about this song and how it makes me feel. It’s so much more than a song to many of us here on tumblr dot com but I’d like to take this time to talk about the song. You got some of the best guitar playing EVER (fight me) accompanying psychedelic funk-y heavy metal/hard rock and a very compelling vocalist with straight up unabashed good songwriting and production that makes me swoon every. Single. Time. Yeah no, this song makes me feel things and not just for…him…reasons.

Also the way he says “That leader dies.” is fucking sexy.

[ryoryeonggu]

THE UMBRELLAS VS THE ORIGINALS

Seven siblings

Worst parent(s) in the world turning children into monsters

Abused, manipulated and traumatized childhood

Dysfunctional dynamic

A bunch of idiots with a worst/chaotic team up ever

Luther Hargreeves / Elijah Mikaelson

Leader of the family

The strongest one

Protective

Honorable aka "thAT'S mURDER" vs"neeeeeklaussss"

Polite and respectful to the elders

Tries to keep his siblings behave then finally gives up in the end

Only wants to protect his family and decides what's best for them but ends up making all bad decisions

Suits (Black suit / Monkey suit)

Diego Hargreeves / Finn Mikaelson

Hero complex

Mommy boy

Easily manipulated

Wants to save people but his strategies always involve violence and murders

Has no clue of wtf is going on

Made fun of him and called him a fool multiple time by his siblings

DILF

“Batman aim lower” vs “Sherlock Holmes after one too many tequilas”

In love with a crazy bad bitch who would fight anyone but them (Sage/Lila)

Allison Hargreeves / Freya Mikaelson

Big sister who takes no shit from anyone

A powerful bad bitch with "i don't give a sh*t" energy

Lost her child

Cares a lot about her siblings but also so done with their stupidity and endless bickerings

Done with everyone in general

Rolls eyes 90% her screen time and shut people's mouth with her power

Would do anything to get what she wants

Has soft spot for his little sister / smol little brother

Klaus Hargreeves / Kol Mikaelson

No one takes him seriously but ends up having all the answers, everyone pls listen to him

"nowhere to be found" but always shows up when needed

Wildest and wisest

Unique power amongst family (seeing ghosts / witch)

Alcoholic and high all the time

Tells the kidnapper "my family don't give a shit about me" while being tortured

A punching bag

Highest death and coming back from the death counts

Deep quotes / nonsense shit / inappropriate jokes

Sexually active

Lives for dramas and chaos

"Disgusting but consistent" aka a sexy trash

Fun uncle

Looks sociable but actually anti-people ("don't touch me" and you can't say Kol didn't accidentally start a cult too then ran away from his worshippers)

Five Hargreeves / Klaus Mikaelson

Psychotic murder

An aggressive sarcastic dramatic bitch

Master of planning

Disappointed at his incompetent siblings all the time

"is it too late to be unadopted" vs "this family makes me want to murder people" - but actually just wants to be with his family and wants them to stay together

"I'm better than all of you" aka "I'm the hybrid" "I'm the DADDY here"

"LISTEN TO ME YOU IDIOTS/USELESS PUKE BAG" and "if you don't do it I will kill you" aka yelling, insulting and threatening are his love languages

Throwing, kicking and screaming aka the stress relievers (note: the stress level is always high)

Teleports out of nowhere and hovers over people like creeps

Everyone want to kill him (including his own family and his brothers's lovers)

Grumpy boomer and anti-people

Anger issues, paranoia and potentially some personality disorders

A romantic when he's in love

Has soft spot for his little sister / smol little brother

Ben Hargreeves / Henrik Mikaelson

DEAD

Sweetest angel who never did anything wrong in his life

Adored by everyone in the family

The family fell apart after he died

Viktor Hargreeves / Rebekah Mikaelson

The baby of the family

Soft, sensitive and emotional

Looks like a cinnamon roll but actually can kill you

Adored by everyone in the family but also was abused, manipulated and lied to all his/her life

Abandonment issues

Stubborn and naive, but grew to be the mature one

Almost got his/her family killed twice but has precious bonds with all siblings

Desperate for love and finding identity

Kissed boy(s) and girl(s) (terrible taste in men)

Note: Finn and Kol could pretty much switch places to each other since they has a lot of similarities - anger issues, trauma from being locked/abandoned in coffins/ graves, being overlooked, underestimated and treated like a fool, dying and coming back to life repeatedly... Kol is also head over heels for a special power girl who had a vendetta against his brother and tried to kill their family. And he also did have a bit of hero complex, given the fact that he died twice for trying to save someone/the world. But I prefer that way because Kol is the one who matches the chaotic energy of Klaus xD

[exlibrisfangirl]

For the character ask: Chris Argent

NOT ANNA BEING PREDICTABLE AF <3

do I like them: Duhhhh. Just a little bit.

5 good qualities: loyal, compassionate, intelligent, blue eyes, BEARD

3 bad qualities: loyal lol, cult survivor who has been indoctrinated and radicalized from birth (but he gets over that), fictional

favourite episode/scene/etc: I love 3x19 (Letharia Vulpina), 3x22 (De-Void), and 6x19 (Broken Glass) - all for Dergent reasons, of course - but also because Chris’s relationship development with Derek is intrinsically tied to his redemption arc. Sorry not sorry, I don't make the rules.

I also love 6x20 (Wolves of War) for Chris because he finally gets closure where his family is concerned, and we see in the flash-forward that he's happy with his found family, upholding his redemption by still following Allison's code and devoting himself to protecting innocents and the people he loves.

Don't even get me started on scenes. Every time he does something iconically passive-aggressive. Literally every scene he shares with Derek. Every single time he makes a badass entrance, guns blazing.

otp: Derek "Don't Expect Me to Risk My Life Saving Yours" Hale. Dergent. OTP: You Saved My Life. Ironically, they have ruined my life in the best possible way.

I do also ship McArgent (OTP: The Hunter and The Healer), though, because MAMA MCCALL DESERVES NICE THINGS, OKAY. GET IT MAMA.

brotp: I guess Dergent also fits here, since they started out as a BROTP before they evolved into the raging, ravenous monster of an OTP they are now, lol.

ot3: Does Dechrissa count? Asking for me.

notp: Petopher (Chris/Peter Hale). Argentcest (Chris/Kate, Chris/Allison).

best quote: “Didn't anyone ever tell you not to bring claws to a gunfight?”

“AnOTHER wEREWOLF?!”

“You know the question I had after Gerard first told me about our family... why us? He quoted me Winston Churchill: 'The price of greatness is responsibility.' Personally, I think it's more about knowledge - what we know, the truth we know about the world - that makes us responsible... for a young couple, their newborn daughter, anyone who doesn't have the power to defend themselves.”

“I believe in Derek Hale.”

head canon: Hand-to-hand combat and handling weaponry actually did NOT come naturally to him the way it did to Kate or Allison; Chris had to work really hard at it... which is especially interesting to think about when you consider the fact that the Argent men are raised to be soldiers, while the women are raised to be strategists/leaders. Chris's incredibly sexy competence and ease (and even, dare I say, flare?) wielding weapons is the result of maybe 10% innate talent, 20% reading about/studying them, and 70% practice.

give me a character and i'll answer

[chasingfictions]

ok actually im mad about this now....FAITH SHOULD NOT HAVE GONE 2 PRISON—- alternate ats s1 where faith joins the team to atone for her sins and is just a member of the fang gang from the jump ..... angel needs 2 do some complicated errand for wolfram and hart as a trade to get them to expunge faith's record ..... faith and wes have a deep-seated tension due to their collective trauma ...... faith pushes angel to work through the way he is projecting all of his serial killer psychology onto her when she's just a child who went astray ...... faith and cordy being sexy and correct and brash and going shopping together and gossiping about their love lives..... another woman being in the fang gang ...........

faith and gunn getting along incredibly well actually and becoming immediate besties.... faith and gwen raiden fucking because faith is not going 2 let a little electrocution stop her from screwing the hot leather-wearing girl .......... faith being so deeeeeeply betrayed when angel abandons the gang for darla in s2 like seriously another fucking blonde girl u kidding me........ faith becoming the leader of the fang gang in his absence instead of wesley but still making wesley do all the boring parts and they continue 2 bond and heal their trauma ........ aith and fred Reaaalllly not understanding each other but they have weird girl solidarity and fred is so genuine that faith can't even be annoyed at her ..... faith actually KILLING IT at caritas karaoke and her and lorne clocking each other as fellow gays immediately ......... faith kicking the shit out of lilah and lindsay on the regular ............ faith literally becoming the most revered warrior in the history of pylea ..................... faith and angel bonding over catholic trauma and their love of white ribbed tank tops underneath leather ................. faith dating every single supernatural gay girl in LA ........ faith and angel commiserating over being baffled by updates to buffy's love life .................. faith being SO confused about connor but also having a lot of Bad Mother trauma from seeing darla sacrifice herself to save connor and keeps trying to buy the baby knives as presents bc she doesnt know what else to do and angel is like STOP BUYING MY BABY KNIVES and faith is like BUT THEY'RE REALLY SMALL ONES THEY'RE NOT EVEN TOO BIG FOR HIS HANDS........ faith and lilah having a lot of weird tension bc faith lvoes an authority figure who purports to know her and it brings up a lot of mayor stuff .............. faith going Allll Innnnnnnn for Jasmine because you know she is absolutely cult bait and then being So Pissed when it ends ......... faith being a full agent of chaos during the s5 wolfram and hart era ............ GUYS IT MOTHERFUCKING WRITES ITS FUCKING SELF

[persepholline]

I've read that article about the romanticization of the Darkling and while I absolutely understand people who are pissed off/sad and I agree that it's shitty, I find LB's attitude towards Darkles stans very funny in a "girl what are you doing" sort of way because it's so petty like I've never heard of a bestselling author writing a portion of their fans into their books as a crazy cult before, it clearly hit a nerve

I'm new to the fandom but the feeling I get is she wrote something problematic ten years ago and became very embarrassed about it afterwards so she turned on the fans that liked it as a way to absolve herself. Especially since fandoms in general have become a lot more focused on discussion of what constitutes healthy/acceptable relationships to write about. And in a way I get it I had a huge Twilight phase in high school and afterwards I was super embarassed about it because of how problematic and cringe it was. But now with distance and more maturity I'm able to both still see why it was problematic and also why I was drawn to it (mostly the very unhinged representation of female desire) and like...it's really not the end of the world and no it never made me believe that breaking into somebody's room at night to watch them sleep was actually ok in real life lmao. This feels so obvious to me but apparently it needs to be said.

(More under the break this is turning into an essay, I've been thinking of this a lot recently)

And of course it's good to have these discussions about how historically romance tropes have echoed social dynamics of men's shitty behavior being romanticized and excused. But these days they often are so simplistic and focused on chasing clout that they become this weird new puritanism and moral panic about oh now women are reading novels it's going to make them hysterical or something

So you have these weird assumptions that you can't like a character and also be critical of their actions, or enjoy certain parts of a character and not others, or wish they were written differently and like them more for their potential (which I'm sure stings a bit for an author lol) - it assumes that if you like a character it means you would approve of their actions in real life, or that people just stupidly reproduce whatever they see on TV. That tendency to treat fictional characters like real people is the thing that actually worries me, to be honest, because it indicates a lack of distance and critical capacities regarding how stories are used and received. But people - fans and authors - are so scared of being called out as problematic and harassed for it that they're going to shy away from any nuance.

And yeah I think that it's good that standards of what constitutes an ideal relationship are evolving and becoming more feminist and communicative and all that and we definitely need more of that. But not all fiction has to be aspirational! Sometimes you just want to read about fucked up shit, because it's cathartic or fascinating, even healing at times because with fiction you are absolutely in control and can choose when to close the book. Toxic relationships in fiction can have an appeal specifically because they go to extremes of feeling that we don't want to go to in reality, in exactly the same way as horror movies or very violent action movies - which I don't see a lot of people besides fundamentalist Christians argue that they turn you into violent psychopaths (and that feels very obviously sexist). And for women, who are often taught growing up that love is the purpose of life, the "saving someone with your ability to love" can be a power fantasy in the same way that being a buff superhero who saves the day with their capacity for incredible violence can be a power fantasy for men. Still doesn't mean those women are going to fall in love with actual murderers or that those men are going to start beating up people at night. And love is scary, and weird, and weirdly close to horror at times, with all the potential for loss of self and being vulnerable and overwhelming feelings and potential for being horribly hurt and it should be possible for stories to explore that without anybody screaming about how this is going to Corrupt the Youth or something

And I mean I get it LB wanted to write a cautionary tale for teenagers, but it just did not work for reasons a lot of people have already written about - the fact that the Darkling is the leader of an oppressed minority and is the only one with a real political agenda to end that oppression in the first trilogy, the fact that he helps Alina come into her own power while her endgame LI is someone she keeps herself small for, that she's shamed for wanting power after growing up without any, a generally very wonky conception of privilege, and a lot of other stuff with yucky regressive implications to the point where stanning the villain actually feels liberating and empowering which is a surefire sign that the narrative is broken (unless it's a villain focused story lmao). But of course that Fanside article makes almost no mention of the political dynamics, it's all about interpersonal stuff which is an annoying trend in YA, there are those massive events happening in the background but it's made all about the feelings of the hero(ine) ; war as a self-development quest (which is kind of gross). Helnik is kind of an example of this too - I like them, I think they're fun ! But Matthias spends a big part of the story wanting to brutally murder Nina and her kind, and he mostly changes his mind because he finds her hot. Like you don't feel there is some sort of big revelation that his entire moral system and political framework is completely rotten ; it's all better because of feelings now.

As a teenager that kind of sanctimonious bullshit would have annoyed the hell out of me ; I read those books in my early twenties and I found the ending so stupid I wouldn't have trusted any message or life lessons coming from them. And I liked reading/watching dark stuff as a teenager, as a way to deal with the very intense inner turmoil I was dealing with - and I turned out fine ! Meanwhile I've seen several times women in very shitty relationships being obsessed with positive energies and stories ; they were so terrified of their life not being perfectly wholesome they ended up being delusional about their own situations.

Like personally I think the Darkling is a compelling, interesting, alluring character and also a manipulative, murderous piece of shit and that Alina should get to punish him (like in a sexy way) - but he's also the end result of centuries of war, oppression and trauma and reducing that to "toxic wounded boy" feels kind of offensive ngl ESPECIALLY since the books don't offer any kind of systemic analysis or response to oppression beyond "the bad guy should die" and "now the king/queen is a good guy our problems are solved!!!!"

In Lives of the Saints, we see how Yuri is abused extremely badly and almost killed by his father, and so when his father dies when the Fold swallows Novokribirsk, he thinks the Starless Saint has saved him. Later in KoS/RoW he's turned into this fanatic who explains away all the Darkling's crimes. The other followers talk about how the Starless Saint will bring equality for all men. Then the Darkling comes back and actually thinks his followers are pathetic, which feels again like a very pointed message to his IRL stans. Which is absolutely hilarious to me. Like oh no, if he was real he would not like you and think you're pathetic ! Yeah ...but he's not. Real. Damn right he would not like the fics where Alina puts him on a leash. I'm still going to read them. What is he going to do about it, jump out of the page ? Jfjfjjdhfgfjfj

Anyway I think the intended message is "assholes will use noble political causes for their own gain and to manipulate people" and "being abused/oppressed is not an excuse to behave badly." Which. Sure. But that's kind of like...a tired take, honestly ? A big number of villains nowadays are like this ; either they've been bullied as kids, or they're part of an oppressed group, or they have "good ideals but too extreme". This is not surprising because a lot of mainstream heroic narratives present clinging to the status quo as Good and change as chaotic and dangerous. And like sure in real life people often do bad shit because they're wounded and in danger. But if you want to do a story like that, you have to do it with nuance, talk about cycles of violence, about how society creates vulnerable people to be exploited, about how privilege gives you more choices and the luxury of morals, etc. The Grishaverse does not have this level of nuance (maybe in SoC a little bit but definitely not in TGT). So it kind of comes off as "trauma makes you evil" and "egalitarianism is dangerous" and "if you're abused/oppressed you're not allowed to fight back". And ignores the fact that historically, evil generally comes from unchecked privilege.

I guess my point is that there are many things I like about LB's writing, she knows how to create these really exciting character dynamics, and the world she has created is fascinating. But these stories are not a great starting point for imparting moral lessons. And her best characters tend to be, at least in canon, the morally grey ones. I hope one day she'll be at peace with the fact that she wrote the Darkling the way she did and leave his fans alone but in the meantime I'm just not going to take this whole thing seriously I'm sorry

[rozrae7030]

[Image description: A series of posts from Mark Hulmes @sherlock_hulmes dated July 19, 2023, reading:

Welp, #Criticalrole fam. I couldn't help myself, after thinking about Calianna a lot last few days, I went and did a Levelled-Up version of her and planned my own head cannon for what has happened to her. I'm a Very Amateur Artist so please don't judge me too harshly. (ROFL Emoji) (Sparkling Heart Emoji)

(There is an image of Calianna Mordsson, Mark's half-elven Draconic Sorcerer. He drew it himself. She is graced with several draconic features such as patches of black scales on her right leg, a tail, a fully draconic right arm, scales on the right side of her face surrounding a yellow right eye, and large wings. She has shouler-length black hair and her non-draconic eye is light green-blue. She is wearing a green dress with one white sleeve and a leather corset, confidently cut to show off her draconic features rather than hiding them like she used to. She also wears a red brooch and gold bracelet.)

High Level Calianna Calianna continues to oppose the Cults of Tiamat after meeting the Mighty Nein and generally goes Adventuring. Finds other people taken by the Cults who have draconic lineage. Tries to help them, but some are drawn to Tiamat's power and must be fought. Is nearly caught by the Cult but saved by allies (see Wildemount Campaign Setting) who continue to help her on her journey. Learns thst Serrissa (Cali's adopted mother-figure &cult leader of Caustic Heart) plans to sacrifice a Young Gold Dragon to Tiamat. Cali and allies go to rescue her. As battle ensues, Cali Falters but feels the presence of Bahamut who helps encourage her and overcome her fear & shame of Draconic nature (Gift of Metallic Dragon feat). Cali & Friends save the Gold Dragon, named Goldheart who stays with Cali for a time. They become close and begin a relationship. At some point they "wed" and have kids (how, dragon magic), twin half-dragons with black and gold scales. The boy is named Jest and the girl Calea. Cali now embraces her draconic look and is more confident and joyful with her life in Port Damali.

For the outfit, the idea is the it keeps many of the elements @ornerine did for her official art, but now it's the non-dragon part of her that's more obscured as Cali embraces her dragon lineage. She's more confident & happier and it also reflects my own discovery of femme confidence As the two of us are interlinked, I wanted to add a little touch of my own discovery of embracing sexy, femme, empowerment, and outfits. Also, Dragon Mommy. Enough said. OH and the little bit of written Lore is a VERY short summary version. I actually wrote a full page of stuff and then filled out the new character sheet with more details. But too much to cover in a few tweets! Maybe a fun video idea?

Had a quick go at sketching what Cali's Dragon Wife, Goldheart, would look like in humanoid form. Not sure I can be bothered to finish it, but gives you an idea of what I was envisioning. (ROFL emoji)(Cool Sunglasses emoji)(Thumbs-Up emoji)

(There is an image of Goldheart the gold dragon as a humanoid. She has shoulder-length blonde hair with long bangs parted and pushed back behind her long pointed ears. She has a green orb earring in her right earlobe. She has two gently curved golden horns pointing upwards at maybe a thirty degree angle; they are about 8 inches long with one metal ring on each and a gold cap on the end of the left one. She has large golden eyes decorated with green eyeshadow, a small amount of bright pink lipstick, and faint golden runework surrounding her eyes and on her chin. She is blushingly smiling, showing off her fangs. All in all she is gorgeous. Below her head is a sketch of the rest of her body, standing with left hand grasping her right elbow, like a lesbian marveling at how lucky she is to have married her wife [source: me every time I see my wife]. She is wearing an elegant gown with off-the-shoulder sleeves.)

Twitter user @Gabriellowena replied: "The sons name is JEST cries I was just thinking about her the other day I'm glad you gave us an update (Happy Cry emoj)" Mark Replied: "Jest and Calea, names inspired by two of her first friends and people that changed her life. (Big Smile emoji)"

/end image description]

So Mark Hulmes posted some thoughts on post-campaign Calianna on Twitter the other day and I for one am emotional

Calianna naming her children after Jester and Caleb may just be one of my favorite things now 🥺 Also dragon wives beloved

Hulmes considers this headcanon because it didn’t happen in game and Matt hasn’t approved it, technically, but it’s very sweet and Calianna is his soooooo. Canon. Yeah.

(I attempted to add alt text for all images but tumblr started replacing every image with the first one so… text transcripts would be greatly appreciated! 🥲)