#sam: isn't that too much meat?

[streets-in-paradise]

Andy Barclay and Dean Winchester are two of my favorite characters I would invite over for an asado because I know they would appreciate it.

[sakuravalelp]

Don't eat anything else - DC X DP

Using this prompt

Next part

Masterpost

Danny is sure that if it wasn't for his ghost side, he would have already died from malnutrition. Vlad, the monster he is, doesn't allow him to eat any meal without human meat. It's not that he isn't allowed vegetables, fruits, and animal byproducts, but every meal has human meat somehow. Vlad watches him with piercing eyes while he eats, making sure he doesn't avoid the meat.

He's gone days without eating just to avoid it, but eventually, he does have to eat. He has eaten human meat! He wonders if this is why Dan decided to renounce his human side.

Future Vlad had told him that Dan wanted to get rid of his ghost side due to his grief, but maybe Dan thought he would feel better about eating humans if he were a complete ghost. Danny could understand that, but he now knows it wouldn't work...

The Infinite Realms are full of different species, and the act of eating another species that's able to coexist with you in a society feels just as horrendous as cannibalism. Was finding this out what drove Dan mad?

He isn't getting much nutrition when he does eat either, not with him vomiting at least half the times he does. Not that Vlad cares about that;

"Ectoplasm will take care of your body while you stubbornness dies. I do think it would be easier for you if you just stopped being ridiculous and eat."

Ectoplasm and water are the only things he has free access too, and Danny hates how grateful he is for at least having that.

As if things couldn't be worse, he's also been forced to cook the meat. When he started learning how to cook with Tucker's mom, he never, never, would have imagined he would be using his abilities for this. He has grown numb to butchering human corpses…

Corpses are a frequent view in the kitchen. He's scared one day he'll recognize the face of one of them. Vlad knows it and uses to control him, telling him that if he doesn't behave, their next meal might be Tucker or Sam. He hates to admit how docile he's grown.

He hasn't seen Tucker, Sam, or anyone since the explosion in the lab took his family. Vlad doesn't allow him to leave the mansion for anything besides galas. He has him collared like a dog to prevent him from leaving. Except, his collar is a shock bracelet charged with blood blossoms that would inject into his wrist if he tries to escape.

He thought Vlad was bluffing and tried escaping once. His whole body felt like it was burning up in flames, and he wasn't able to move for a week. Vlad told him that next time, the dose would keep him in bed for a month. He hasn't tried escaping since.

He's still talking with them through chat. He doesn't know if Vlad knows, but he doesn't think he does; he told him his phone exploded with the lab. But he can't tell them anything. How could he? How is he supposed to tell them he has cooked humans? That he has eaten humans? That he has grown somewhat numb to it? He can't, and then he feels like he can't talk about anything else that is happening.

Today, as he serves the entrance dish to the first guests Vlad has had since he took Danny in, he forces a fake smile on his face. Inside, he feels a wave of nausea and dread as intense as the first time he was forced to eat human meat. The grotesque irony of presenting this dish, knowing what it contains, twists his stomach and makes his hands tremble ever so slightly.

They don't know. They have no idea that they're being served their own species. They don't know, and Danny is the one forced to make them eat their own kind.

The appetizer is a vegetable-based soup with barely any traces of meat, but the main dish features a full human fillet. The guilt and revulsion claw at his insides, nearly choking him. He has to at least stop them from eating that. He needs to get them out of here somehow. And maybe, just maybe, it’s time to try and put a stop to everything else. He can’t let this atrocity continue.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Tim didn't feel comfortable listening to Masters talk about how good the food would be, while Masters' heir served the appetizer with the fakest smile Tim had ever seen. The teen looked so clearly uncomfortable and scared around his guardian that it was hard to resist the urge to grab the boy and leave.

Masters had praised his godson’s cooking during the gala last week, all the while keeping a hand possessively on the teen’s shoulder. Tim didn't like how controlling it seemed, nor how the grip tightened when the teen mumbled quietly about his name being Danny. It was difficult to witness the entire interaction, especially as the teen appeared to fall into a state of complete dissociation afterward.

They were already planning to investigate Masters due to the suspicious nature of all his contracts, but after the gala, they had to shift their focus to helping the teen. They were fortunate that Masters had granted them easy access to his mansion with the invitation to try Danny's cooking.

They couldn't all go to Masters's and leave Gotham behind, so at the dinner, it was just Bruce, Cass, and Tim. Jason was also in the city because he refused to stay away from an obvious abuse case, but he wasn't allowed at the dinner. He would have attacked Masters just from seeing Danny’s uncomfortable stance under his hand during their greeting.

Masters had insisted that Danny serve the food since he had made it, and now Danny stood beside him, serving him the last plate of soup. Danny stumbled for a moment, and before Tim knew it, he was bathed in soup. Tim blinked, surprised at how the soup wasn’t as hot as he had expected, given the steam rising from the other plates.

"Daniel! What the hell are you doing!?"

Vlad exclaimed, standing up from his place, and the teen beside Tim paled.

“I—I am so sorry!” Danny apologized, using napkins to help clean off the soup, his hands slightly trembling. “Did you get burned?”

"No, no, don't worry about it. I'm okay."

"It isn't okay. Daniel, you ruined Mr. Drake's clothes!"

"Sorry... Let's- I think I have clothes that could fit you... So you could change?"

Oh, so that was why his soup wasn’t hot. Danny had poured it on him deliberately; he was trying to get him alone. Despite how scared Danny looked, it seems he still clung to the hope of escaping. Tim felt a surge of relief and determination. He was glad to see that Danny was looking for a way out, and this chance could be their opportunity to devise a plan.

"Thanks, I would appreciate that." he said as he stood from his sit. He saw how Masters was opening his mouth to say something, but Tim didn't want to risk loosing the opportunity. "Please, don't worry about it Mr. Masters, accidents happen, we'll be back in a moment."

Tim locked eyes with Bruce for just a second, a barely noticeable nod telling him Bruce trusted him to do this right. He then followed Danny through the mansion’s halls and up the stairs, noting that Danny’s bedroom was on the top floor. Danny kept his arms crossed, trying to make himself appear smaller.

"I'm really sorry Mr. Drake. I should have been more careful."

"It's okay really, and please, just call me Tim."

"Oh, um, thanks, but Vlad doesn't like nicknames... would- would it be okay to use Timothy instead?"

“… Yeah, sure.” It seemed Vlad controlled the way Danny was allowed to speak. “Would you mind if I call you Danny then?” Tim asked. He had been mentally referring to him as Danny since the gala and wanted to match that with his spoken words.

Danny shrank farther into himself, and Tim was about to retract his suggestion, but then a small smile appeared on Danny's face and he turned to look at Tim.

"Yeah, I would like that." Danny said in a hushed toned, and a hint of fears in his eyes. Like he was afraid to accept the suggestion.

Tim wondered if Masters had punished Danny for mumbling his preferred name at the gala. However, before he could dwell further on the types of punishments Masters might have used, Danny's eyes widened.

"Ancients, you even have soup on your hair-"

Despite Tim’s attempts to reassure him that everything was okay, Danny continued to apologize throughout the journey to his bedroom. Lamenting how foolish it had been to let the plate slip, and how he should have known better.

Danny’s constant self-reproach made Tim question whether he had misjudged the situation. Maybe it had been a genuine mistake. In theory, it wouldn't matter, because he got to talk alone with Danny either way, but he liked thinking that Danny was reaching out for their help.

Once in Danny's bedroom, Danny beelined to his closet to give Tim a change of clothes. Tim took the opportunity to look around. Danny's room was… impersonal. It was sophisticated and extravagant, like a room that would be featured in a magazine. Tim was sure Danny hadn't decided on the decor. He was surprised to see the bedroom had a large balcony connected to it. Maybe Masters trusted it was high enough for Danny not to attempt escaping through it?

"Would this outfit work for you?"

Danny was holding a suit similar to the one Masters had worn at a previous gala. Now that Tim paid attention to Danny's outfit, he noticed that Danny's clothes today were almost a smaller version of what Masters was wearing, with just enough differences to not be immediately recognized as the same. Thinking back to last weeks gala, their outfits were also similar. To what extent was Masters controlling Danny's life?

"Um... if you don't like it I can grab another one..."

Tim blinked, realizing he had just stared silently at Danny while he offered him the clothes.

"No, sorry, got lost in thoughts, I'm okay using those."

"Okay, I'm glad. Again, sorry for..." Danny motioned to Tims clothes "You can change in my bathroom over there." He pointed to a door beside the bed. "Maybe also take a shower?" Danny got a towel from his closet and offered it to Tim.

"Yeah a shower would be good." Tim said, taking clothes and the towel and entering the bathroom.

He'll talk with Danny once he was changed into clean clothes. If only to calm Danny's guilt about the incident.

Danny's bathroom was spacious, with a jacuzzi bathtub, a separate shower, and one of those popular bidet toilets. From an outside perspective it must look like Danny has anything he could want, but Tim knows better than anyone that money doesn't guaranty a good household. It's sad knowing that any CPS agent that did decide to look into this, would be easily push away by Masters money.

Once Tim had showered and changed clothes, he prepared to go back to the bedroom to talk to Danny, but before he did, a green glow from the corner of his eye caught his attention. Tim sucked a breath when he saw what it was. A syringe with traces of Lazarus waters and blood sat beside the sink.

"Timothy? Everything okay in there? Did the clothes don't fit?"

Tim took a photo of the syringe and sent it to the group chat with the caption, "We may have to add experimentation to Danny's abuse." After taking a sample, he decided to leave the syringe behind, considering the possibility that Masters might use the same syringe more than once and notice its disappearance. He really hoped to get Danny out of there that same day, but if they couldn't, he didn't want to make things more difficult for him.

"Everything is okay! I'll be out in a second."

Tim took one last look around while picking up his dirty clothes, just in case he found anything else. When he left the bathroom, Danny was waiting for him, shifting nervously from side to side. It was time to talk to him.

"Danny, look, I wanted to talk-"

"Ah, let me take your clothes! I'll make sure to clean them and get them back to you!" Danny interrupted him, grabbing his arm and shaking his head with a pleading look.

Tim looked incredulous at Danny for a second, before he realized what was happening and mouthed. "Your bedroom is bugged." He hadn't meant it as a question but Danny had nodded anyway. It was fucked up, Danny couldn't even talk confidently in his own bedroom?

"Right, thank you Danny. I would appreciate that. Perhaps we could take the opportunity to meet again in the future."

Danny gave him the look an adult might give a naive child when talking about an unreachable fantasy, and Tim couldn't help but frown at it. Did Danny believe that even seeing them again was too out of reach?

"That would be great, I'll talk with Vlad about the possibility."

Tim was going to say something else to try to reassure Danny that they would be able to meet, but Danny just handed him two pieces of paper. One was unfolded with text on it, and the other was folded into a small square, smaller than his pinky. He read the unfolded paper first.

- Don't eat anymore of the food. Pretend to have some sort of family emergency and leave, please. Read the other paper when you're far away. -

Tim looked at Danny with questioning wide eyes, but Danny just gave him another pleading look. Tim took a deep breath and took a photo to the paper and sent it to the group chat.

"Oh common, aren't you a little old to ask your guardian about every little meet up you have?" (Would you leave with us?)

Danny gives a nervous chuckle.

"Maybe, but after my family, Vlad tends to be really protective, you know?" He said while pointing to his bracelet.

Tim hadn't noticed how tick the bracelet was before. It was metallic, with a red liquid line in the middle.

"Shock bracelet?" He mouthed.

Danny nodded and then mouthed, "if I scape, it poisons me."

Tim pales a bit at that. They had underestimated how dangerous Masters was.

He motioned to his phone and took a photo of the bracelet after Danny nodded and sent to the group chat with the caption: "Shock bracelet with the capacity of poisoning Danny. We won't be able to get him out right now."

"We should probably go back with the others now."

-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-

Group chat

Coffee is my life: *Photo of the syringe*

Coffee is my life: We may have to add experimentation to Danny's abuse.

Death boy walking: Fuck!

Death boy walking: @ Adoption addict, we have to get the kid out of there now!

Bones? What bones?: Bruce is entertaining Masters with Cass at the moment little wing.

Bones? What bones?: I doubt he'll read this.

The blood son: There's no way that buffoon has any relation with grandfather. He's company does not follow any of the leagues morals.

Light & shadow: Maybe he found another Lazarus pit?

Light & shadow: They're supposedly naturally formed right? It shouldn't be that crazy for someone out of the league to have one.

Computer genius: It might not even be Lazarus waters. The tone is slightly off.

The blood son: It is possible that it is a different variation of dionesium.

Death boy walking: Who cares? He's injecting the kid with that thing!

Not Bruces kid: Hate to say it but the zombie is right, we can find what exactly when Danny is safe.

Coffee is my life: *Photo of paper with text*

Light & shadow: ????

Light & shadow: Is the food poisoned!?

Computer genius: Already told them through comms to not eat anymore food.

Computer genius: If the food is poison it hasn't affected them yet.

Light & shadow: Do you guys have a way to deal with the poison there?

Bones? What bones?: Don't worry Bruce doesn't go anywhere without the poison antidote kit.

Death boy walking: Of course he doesn't. The paranoid bastard.

The blood son: It isn't paranoia if the danger is real Todd.

Computer genius: I'll call Bruce in 10 to pretend a family emergency.

Death boy walking: You are NOT going without Danny!

Bones? What bones?: Any possibility on taking Danny with you @ Coffee is my life?

Coffee is my life: *Photo of bracelet*

Coffee is my life: Shock bracelet with the capacity of poisoning Danny. We won't be able to get him out right now.

Not Bruces kid: WTFWTFWTFWTFWTFWTFWTF

Not Bruces kid: Wasn't this a low stakes rescue???

Not Bruces kid: Why is this man coming up with plans in the big villain category?

Light & shadow: I'm scared of whatever "the other paper" that Danny gave Tim says.

Light & shadow: Wouldn't be surprised if Masters was connected with a trafficking ring.

Bones? What bones?: @ Death boy walking?

Bones? What bones?: You're too silent...

Bones? What bones?: Remember you won't be able to barge in without putting Danny in danger.

Death boy walking: I ALREADY KNOW THAT DICKFACE.

The blood son: Tt, don't be so surprise by the warning Todd.

The blood son: Your past actions have prove it necessary.

Death boy walking: Shut the fuck up demon brat. You're not one to talk.

... The blood son is writing ...

Light & shadow: Everyone have had their outburst of bad decisions.

Light & shadow: Can we go back to Danny?

Light & shadow: How likely do you think it is that he's a meta?

Light & shadow: Because, I think it's pretty high.

Not Bruces kid: Did you see something strange in him on the gala?

Light & shadow: No, but the bracelet are pretty similar to the meta-suppressors collars I've seen in the past.

Computer genius: I'm calling Bruce right now.

-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-

next part

[aimedis]

redacted audio headcanons: jealousy | shaw pack edition

sam and darlin are going in the solaire clan one

david likes to think he's above such "immaturity" in his relationship with angel to get jealous. but he's not. it doesn't happen often, but when he notices the way people look at his mate, he gets so pissed. he knows that angel smiles at and is kind to almost everyone, and they love that trait in them but he honestly would like it a little more if they didn't ever smile at anyone that isn't him. like ever. they laugh at him for being so dramatic but he's like 60% serious. but other than mild irritation when angel waves excitedly at literally everyone, david hates it when they jokingly flirt with their friends/packmates. at least once a day he sees them giggling with baaabe or sweetheart either in person or on the phone and he has to fight the urge to pull them (gently) into his side and keep them there. a fight he loses more often than not if they're within arms reach. he's been known to toss their phone away from them while they whine, keeping his arms wrapped around them (and recently, absentmindedly toying with the ring on their finger). angel has taken to rubbing his arm while softly reassuring them that they're only joking and that he's the only one they love as he pouts hums into their neck.

angel gets jealous a little more often than david does. obviously, david gets a million stares whenever he steps outside. he's tall, sexy, handsome, big, all of the above, and angel knows that. those are the exact reasons why they stare. but that's them, they're david's mate. and the fact outside people think they have the right to look at what's theirs drives them insane. it's not david's fault, they don't blame or not trust him to be loyal. they just hate other people looking at him like he's a piece of meat. on a shopping spree at the mall david and angel went on, david had at least three people try and give him their number as if angel wasn't standing right there and that's not counting the hundreds of second glances he got. to which david would only flash his ring at them with a completely straight face and pull angel away. however, they had enough by the third person "accidentally" bumping into him and started making out with him in the middle of the store they were in. david didn't have many complaints, he had already seen how irritated they were getting and just suggested they leave afterwards. angel spent the entire car ride home complaining angrily about every single time someone so much as looked at him for more than two seconds. david gave them their hand to hold, barely wincing when they squeezed it as tight as they possibly could. he honestly thinks it's sexy whenever angel rants about him being flirted with, he can't help but smirk when he asks what he should do about it. he offers to tattoo their name on his forehead, let them bite him everywhere that's visible hard enough to leave a bruise, punch anyone who dares to even breathe near him etc. and in the moment, angel would prefer watching david spit in peoples' faces but they know he can't do that. so they resort to the bites option. everywhere.

asher gets jealous once in a blue moon. most of the time when baaabe talks about other people being interested in them he's just using it as an opportunity to flex that he's the one actually in bed with his mate. he says things like "and i'm the one you come home to at the end of the day" with the widest smile on his face. asher always talks about being so lucky to bag someone like baaabe instead of focusing on being overly protective over what's his. still, there have been more than a few times where asher can't hide the annoyance he feels when it comes to baaabe spending time with other people as opposed to him. baaabe spends a little too much time talking about the work parties they go and people they talk to without him and he starts pouting. only slightly, but baaabe notices and they laugh a little. they run their fingers through his hair when he starts dramatically sulking about people trying to "take them away from him", letting him get it out of his system before they reassure him firmly but kindly that no one could ever replace him. and asher usually recovers by that moves on. despite not being jealous often, asher still gets possessive with holding onto baaabe in public and obviously staking his claim on them subtly. it doesn't happen often, but if there was ever a moment where someone tried to "take" his mate from him, they would find themself of the wrong end of a wolf's teeth.

baaabe shows jealously just as much as asher does, not a lot but not never. asher is very friendly and he talks to everyone about anything. some people appreciate this on a surface level, but others sometimes try to take it in a way that was never intended. asher has had people blatantly flirt with him due to this but he just pretends to not notice until baaabe comes to save him. most of the time baaabe isn't bothered enough to feel negatively about it, choosing to be amused by it. but there are times where they feel uncharacteristic anger when they see someone making an obvious move on their mate or he talks about someone a little too much/kindly. to which they go to play save a hoe a little faster, pulling asher away a little harder or subconsciously frowning. asher takes baaabe's jealously very seriously, knowing that they spiral easily when they feel like this. he showers them in affection for a while until he's sure they're fine. baaabe recovers fairly quickly as long as they get to snuggle up to ash for a little bit.

milo has definetly threatened to kill someone for sweetheart. he's very possessive but in a "never touch my mate" way instead of being mad at sweetheart themself for being around others. sweetheart didn't think he was overly possessive when at first but once within the first year of their relationship, they mentioned a coworker flirting with them and milo went deathly silent before he growled. sweetheart laughed at him because they were caught off guard but milo was genuinely ready to fight someone. milo has a love hate relationship with people appreciating sweetheart. he knows damn well his mate is attractive and he believes that people can appreciate that, but he hates it when anyone at all flirts with them in any capacity. he feels his eyes twitch when even packmates make small comments about them jokingly flirty. he'll laugh and tell whoever to back off under the guise of a joke but sweetheart can tell he's genuinely irritated. when he gets the chance he'll pull them as close to him as possible and rub his hands wherever on sweetheart's body they were touched by anyone else. they let him because they think it's both funny and cute as well as enjoying the feeling of being "claimed". but sweetheart "brat" greer never passes up an opportunity to tease him about it which only leads to milo taking his jealously out on them in the bedroom.

sweetheart doesn't get as jealous as milo does as often. milo is a pretty social guy and is a natural charmer so they understand why people would be interested in him. and they love showing off the fact that he only ever has eyes for them. then again, on the worse days, they can't help but feel jealous when milo doesn't pay as much attention to them. sweetheart is a very expressive person facially, so their expression shows their annoyance before they can even verbalize it. still, they'll pretend they haven't even noticed milo talking to someone else, brushing him off in their typical petty manner. milo notices them sulking in a corner for presumably no reason, but because he can read them like a book, he figures it out soon enough. he pokes a little fun at them to which they only sulk harder, turning away from him and telling him to go back to whoever is so much more important than them. milo finds them adorable when they're (minorly) upset with him so he wraps his arms around their shoulders, working the tension out so they can relax while he whispers apologies in their ear for ever making them jealous. that they'll always be his top priority, that they can always prove who he belongs to in front of everyone. sweetheart lets him do whatever and pretends they don't love hearing those words come out of his mouth while they're already planning every single hickey they're gonna put on his body.

[justmeinadaze]

Gunslinger (Eddie X Y/N)

A/N: So yeah this was my idea for Sam in Warfare but I didn't want to write for him just because he is a real person. Plus, I thought with Eddie there's more meat in his history. Idk but lol yeah kind of same elements in what happened to Sam happens to Eddie but this is more about the PTSD aspect of the aftermath. While writing I was listening to music and "Gunslinger" by Avenged Sevenfold came on which felt perfect for the story and the title <3

Warnings: Husband/Solider Eddie & Fem Wife Y/N, SMUT, light dirty talk, p in v, praise (good girl), aftercare always, FLUFF, these two definitely love each other and are high school sweethearts.

ANGST *plays angsty drums with angsty sticks in an angsty room*

This does primarily focus on PTSD, not just for a solider who got hurt but the partner of someone who has to experience the effects of a husband with PTSD. His injuries are mentioned but not delved into too deeply, he does have flashbacks, trouble sleeping, overstimulation with sound, etc. Reader does get the brunt of these, mentions of him accidentally choking her (brief), him trying to protect her while disassociating.

She talks about how much it hurts her to see him in pain.

They do talk about a letter he wrote to her if anything ever happened to him and he does read it to her. You will feel that because I felt it and I wrote the thing lol

My trauma isn't from the military but I utilized what I've experienced myself as well as from experience talking to friends who served. If you feel like this may trigger you I understand! Im angsty, I write angsty stuff. and sometimes I delve into certain angsty themes because it not only helps me to write it out but I know you guys experience things like this as well. You're not alone.

Please if you can, donate to any fundraisers that help vets like the Wounded Warrior Project. I worked for the VA for a few months when the pandemic started. You'd be surprised how long they wait for care.

Word Count: 4401

"Never let it show The pain I've grown to know 'Cause with all these things we do It don't matter when I'm coming home to you."

“What would you like for breakfast?”, you ask as you display both boxes of cereal you know he likes. 

“You ask me that like I won’t be eating either of those as breakfast, lunch, dinner, and the occasional snack.”, Eddie teases, his grin growing when you laugh and toss both boxes into the basket. 

When he got back from serving overseas, things had been incredibly rough. 

Hell, even before he got back, it was hard. His COs had called to tell you he was wounded in battle but wouldn’t tell you anything more. You begged for a flight to him as soon as possible and you were thankful they were able to get you to your husband without much resistance. 

He was in surgery when you landed and by the time you got to the hospital, he was asleep in a bed next to another passed out solider. 

You sobbed as you took in all the bandages and cuts along his body. 

The military didn’t tell you much, just that a bomb went off and Eddie got caught in the middle. They said he was a hero, trying to warn and push away as many of the others he could. 

Of course he did because that was Eddie Munson. 

 One of his friends who survived, told you the entire story about being held down in a house and a bomb going off. Your husband saw it coming when no one else did and warned his unit to run. 

When the smoke cleared, he was the one bleeding and screaming.

They said the only time he stopped was when he talked about you. 

“We told him everything would be ok and to hang on so we could have a chance to embarrass him in front of you.”, the man chuckles lightly. “He told us to give you this letter and if he didn’t make it for us to look after you.”

You never opened that letter telling yourself he made it even though you knew the real reason was it would kill you to hear what your husband believed his last words would be to you. 

After a month, the military discharged him from being overseas but allowed him later on to work as a mechanic for the cars and tanks on the military base. Once you were in the states, he became a part of a rigorous physical therapy routine, that got him back on his feet in no time even though now he moved a bit slower than before. 

The PTSD triggers were always different, more so how he reacted to them. 

The more time at passed the more jittery he became. You assumed that was because the more he got comfortable the less his guard was up. That didn’t remove the fact that for the first few months, his head was always on a swivel, checking for threats that weren’t there. 

You allowed him as much space and time to process that he needed but that never erased the effect it had on you. The nightmares that had him screaming left bruises on your skin when he would jump up and hit accidently hit your body. The night terrors that had him sleep walking into the living room holding an imaginary weapon as he murmured commands and “yes, sirs” to his team that were currently asleep within their own homes. 

The doctors told you not to wake him but when Eddie began shouting about a threat in the house, you couldn’t help yourself when your palm touched his shoulder and he grabbed your wrist to spin you around, smacking your back to the ground with his hands around your throat. 

You managed to get him awake and he sobbed on the floor beside you as he apologized repeatedly. 

The ramp up to a break down was always the hardest, not just because of how he was with you but how he was with himself. He would glare into a void while you talked during dinner or were watching a movie together in the living room. 

“And my mom mentioned that house again down the street from her. I told her we’re fine where we are but…”, you trail off as he absently nods. “Eddie? Are you ok?”

“Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?”, he snaps as he throws his fork down onto the table. 

“I…you just…seemed distant…”

“I heard you, Y/N. Your mom for a ten thousandth time brought up how you should move closer to her because she thinks she’s being subtle about the fact that she thinks I can’t fucking take care of you!”

“Edward Munson, that’s not what I said and neither did she.”

“Oh please! Your mom has never fucking liked me and now that I’m fucking crazy she thinks she can finally convince you to—”

“You’re not crazy—”

“DON’T INTERRUPT ME WHEN I’M FUCKING—” He sees you jump causing him to blink as if realizing where he was and who he was talking to. “Sweetheart, I’m…fuck…I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean—”

“I know…I know, Eddie.”

Reaching for your arms, he guides you onto his lap and wraps his strong, muscular arms around you. 

“I’m sorry. I just…I’ve been in my own head these past few days, you know? I love you so much.”

His eyes follow the sway of your hips as you step forward and search for the next item on your list while he pushes the cart after you. 

The first time he met you in high school, he was mesmerized by those hips and never hid how sexy he thought you were. The more you both hung out the more he learned that your beautiful personality matched your gorgeous exterior and he knew fairly quickly that he would marry you one day. 

A year after you did tie the knot, he signed up for service and 6 months after was deployed. You tried to push away the pain of knowing he was leaving soon by having as much fun with him as possible. 

“Ok…are you sure about this?”

“No.”, he sighed playfully as he stared at himself into the mirror.

“Oh, come on, Munson, don’t be a baby!”, Steve shouts as he takes a sip from the bottle in his hand. 

“Fuck off, Harrington! Let’s see you cut off all your hair.” All your friends in the room laugh and Eddie exhales as he closes his eyes. “Ok, baby, do it.”

Everyone cheered after the first buzz of his hair was removed and by the time you were done, he had come to accept it, rising to his feet and raising his arms in victory as the younger kids in his friend group jumped up to give him a hug. 

That last night you were together was one of the hardest nights of your life, not just for you but for him. Eddie held you tightly in his embrace as his thumb continuously caressed your arm and his nose would occasionally inhale your smell, committing it to memory to take with him. 

“I don’t think we’ve slept alone in almost three years and before that you used to sneak into my trailer, remember?”, he smiles when you giggle. “I would hold you like this and kiss your skin… asking myself ‘Damn…what the fuck is this perfect angel doing with me?’”

“Eddie. Don’t talk about yourself like that.”, you lightly scold. “To me, you were perfect to. Except maybe the smoking…and the weed…and your sense of humor—”

“Ok, ok, calm down. Those are some of the TOP reasons you fell in love with me.” Rolling on to your back, your eyes take in his face before his lips gently press to yours. “I love you, Y/N.”

“I love you to, Eddie. Make sure to come back to me, ok? Don’t you dare leave me here to live my life without you.”

“I promise, pretty girl. I’ll do everything I can to come back to you.”

As you stop to stare at the cans in front of you, your husband comes around the cart and circles his arms around your waist from behind you. You can’t help but smile as you lean back against him and your arm circles his neck to run your fingers through the small bit of curls that had finally come through. 

“You are so fucking sexy when you stare at a can of peas.”

Your cackle makes him laugh as he hugs you tighter. 

“Thank you. I’ve been working on this new look called ‘domesticity’ and…”

Eddie chuckles harder as he lifts you off your feet and spins you around before dipping you so he could kiss your lips.

“I love you.”

“I love you to, freak.”

Another quick peck, another laugh. 

You enjoy these soft moments…why does chaos always seem to follow?

A loud bang echoes through the store, most likely a clerk dropping a box or someone knocking something heavy over. 

To Eddie though, it was like a bomb going off and without hesitation he shielded you with his body as he pushed you both to the ground. 

Your eyes assessed everything around you.

Your husband was crouching down on one knee with one arm secured around you and the other gripping the shelf in front of him with his head tucked down. 

“Eddie, baby—”

“Shhhh…shhhh…have to be quiet…”, he whispered, his eyes closed tight. “Can’t let them find us.”

“Sweetheart, everything’s ok—”

His large palm roughly clamped down on your mouth as he pulled you to his chest. 

“You have to be fucking quiet!”, he hisses. 

A stranger appears and places her palm delicately on his shoulder. 

“It’s ok, son. The threat is over. Can you confirm?”

With that command, his eyes snap open as he looks around him and even you can see he’s still on the battlefield mentally. 

“C-Confirmed. Hostiles no longer engaging. We need evac now.”

“For who, solider?”

“For…um…” 

You watch as he blinks, slowly taking in the situation as his chest heaves in panic. 

“For who, solider? I need to know who needs help.”, the woman repeats as her eyes comfortingly flick your way as she mouths the words it’s ok.

“Um…I think…my wife…I need to make sure she’s safe.”

“Ok, and if I may ask, when did your wife enlist?”

“She didn’t!”, Eddie snaps as if she just asked him a stupid question. 

“Ok, solider, then again if I may ask, how can I get her evac when she’s not there?”

You saw the momentary doubt flash through his irises before the softness returned and he looked down to realize how he was holding you. 

“Fuck, sweetheart, I’m…I’m so sorry. Are you ok? Did I hurt you?”, he asks as he helps you to your feet.

“Thank you for what you just did.”, you say as you extend your hand out to the older woman who helps him off the ground. 

“Not a problem. My husband and I went to therapy for years and even now sometimes he still has to use what we learned to pull me out of the war.”

“Thank you, ma’am.”, Eddie murmurs as he uses both his hands to encapsulate and shake hers as well. 

“Not a problem at all. You have a beautiful wife who loves you very much.”

“Yeah…I’ve known her since we were kids. I carried her with me while I was there.”, he relayed without prompting as he pulled out his wallet and showed her the now wrinkled with time photo of you he always kept within. 

“Aw, look at you.”, she coos. “And you haven’t aged a day. I bet your kids look as gorgeous as their mother.”

“Oh, uh, no ma’am. No kids yet.”

“Hm.”, she nods knowingly as she shifts her gaze back to you. “Well, there’s still time. It’ll never be easy but definitely worth it should you decide to go down that route.”

#############

Eddie’s sigh filled the room before he firmly walked towards the tv in your bedroom to turn it off and placed himself in front of where you were on the mattress. 

“Everything alright?” Silently, he pushed a folded-up piece of paper in your hand. “What is this?”

“My letter I wrote to you. Before they moved us anywhere, I always wrote something to you just in case something happened to me.” Nodding, you smile in a thin line as you continue to hold it in your palm. “Read it.”

“I can’t.”

“Why?”

“Because I can’t, Eddie.”

“Fine. Then I can read it to you.”

“Edward—“, you growl as you start to try to stand but he pushes you back down and clings to your wrist. 

“I have it memorized. I read and reread it sometimes to make sure I was always conveying how I felt. I learned pretty quickly there weren’t enough words to fully express how much I love you.”

You jaw clenched as you tried to keep your emotions in check.

“Sweetheart, 

Tonight, they are sending us to a little town outside of hostile territory. I’m terrified but my Captain said nothing should go down. If it does and something happens to me, pretty girl, just know I love you with all my heart.” 

“Eddie…stop, ok? You don’t have to do this.”, you grumble as you try to get up again but his hand doesn’t budge. “Let me go, please.”

“From the moment I met you, baby, you changed my life. You never looked at me like I was trailer trash or ever once made me feel like a burden or a problem.”

As he spoke, you kept pulling trying to get free to no avail finally settling on punching and pushing at his chest. His voice never faltered as he continued. 

“You were (are) so beautiful with that tight leather skirt and Dio shirt that had me pushing Steve’s arm telling him ‘That’s the girl I’m gonna marry!’ During band practice, you would sit on my lap and run your fingers through my hair…I would lay my head on your chest and just smell your perfume. Whenever I think of home, that’s the first thing that comes to mind.

If you’re reading this, I’m probably gone…”

The fight in you stops and his hands cup your cheeks as you sob.

“…and I’m so sorry…so fucking sorry for breaking my promise. I said I’d come home to you but I want you to know I’m always with you, honey. In the music we listened to on our road trips to different places. In the wind when you sleep with the window open because you love the smell of the flowers outside. In my clothes I know you’ll wear because even now I bet you’re sleeping in my Hellfire t-shirt! 

I’ll even be there when you find someone new, maybe later down the line, and start a family.

That will be my only regret, pretty girl. Never having a family with you. I know you’ll be a wonderful mom. 

You were the perfect wife to a freak like me.”

Eddie tilts your forehead against his as he grabs your thighs and lifts you till your straddling his lap with your arms circling his neck. 

“Please know you’re always on my mind…even in those last moments…your face will be what I see. 

I love you,

Eddie.”

“I don’t like picturing you in pain…or thinking of my life without you. I hate that your mind takes you back there.”, you whimper as your thumb caresses his cheek. 

“I try to control it. Some days are a lot better than others.”

“I know, baby.”

“Are you afraid of me?”

“No, Eddie—”

“I wish I could fully explain it…how my brain SEES…everything when it’s happening…”

“Eddie—”

“There was that loud pop and I could swear I was back on the street but instead of me bleeding it was you.” Silence befalls you both as you let him continue. “It doesn’t make rational sense for you to be there but…it does…nothing is rational when gun fire and explosions are happening around you… That woman touched me but it felt just my captain when he lets us know he’s there…right behind. She was talking but all I heard was radio chatter…

It was loud, Y/N, and it gets so overwhelming…all your senses are overloaded… Which is kind of odd because when—when it happened, I couldn’t really hear anything. All I could do was feel the pain…”

“They, while you were in surgery, told me they distracted you by trying to talk about me.”

Eddie chuckled then as his chocolate eyes meet yours. 

“Yeah, I remember that. I think I told them I would be pissed if your tattoo was gone.”

Grinning, you carefully lifted up his shirt and tossed it aside as your fingers traced over your name in ink along his chest along with the quote from the song he performed for you at the school talent show. 

“Y/N Y/L/N Munson

When I see you smile, I can face the world.”

Because of his injury, part of the LD in world was lighter than the rest.

His eyes close as you tilt down and allow your lips to tenderly kiss along his skin down his scar that trailed along his side to his stomach. Falling flat against the bed, he happily sighs as he pets your head.

“I’m not afraid of you, baby. I know you’re trying and working hard with your doctor. I know you don’t mean to… Eddie, I know you would never consciously hurt me.”

His stomach deflates underneath your mouth while your fingers gradually reach up to unbuckle his belt and lower his pants with his boxers. Your palm rubs along his thighs as the pads of your fingers bump along the darker scars and indents of the numerous incisions the surgeons sewed into him to save his life. 

“And you’re still as handsome as ever…with your muscles, tattoos, and the cute little pudge on your stomach—“, you tease as you poke his tummy, making him laugh before tugging you to his side and rolling on top of you. 

“Ooooookay, jerk. That’s what happens when your wife is a good cook.”, he jokes back as he softly kisses your lips. “How about, um, we give you some pudge?”

“Hey, I eat my food to.”, you giggle, lightly punching his arm. 

“No, I meant like filling your belly with something more than food.” It takes you a while to catch on but when you do you can’t help but blink at him as your eyebrows furrow together. “I mean, we don’t have to have a baby right now. I know with everything going on—”

Your lips cut him off as your take hold of the back of his neck to bring him to you. After flipping him onto his back, he yanks off your oversized shirt you had worn to bed and promptly attaches to your nipple as you hug his head to your chest. 

“Fuck, baby.”, you moan, grinding your hips against his while his palms glides down your back. 

Your husband’s expert tongue swirled around the bud as he made out with your breast and your eyes rolled as his cock pressed deliciously against the cotton blocking your core. 

“Eddie, please.”

Pushing up into a sitting position, he kissed you feverishly as his fingers pulled at the waistband of your panties making him grunt in frustration before deciding to just tear them so he could slide them off you without you having to let him go. 

“I’ll buy you more. Shit—come here, baby.”

You bit your bottom lip to contain the giddy giggle as he spun you around till you were underneath him once more. His arm twists between you both and the two of you mewled as he ran his mushroom tip between your folds. 

“Eddie, please…I need you.”

“You need me, sweetheart?”, he panted out, kissing your cheek when you vigorously nod. “Say it again, honey.”

“I need you, Eddie. I need to feel you inside me.”

As he guides his length into your entrance, you feel his tongue run along your neck as he sucks a hickey into your skin and your pussy clenches around him. 

“Fuuuuck…that’s my good girl. Always takes my dick so well.”

He finds a steady pace allowing skin to smack against skin as your legs and arms hold him as close to you as possible. 

Sex was never dull with Eddie, granted you had no one to compare it to since he was your first but he was continuously careful with you, praising you and making you feel loved. When he came back home, it took a while for you both to even be intimate again and when you were he was bit rougher than he had been. 

It took him a few months to notice but when he did it killed him. 

“Are you ok? Why are you grabbing your…did I hurt you?”

“It’s…it’s ok, baby.”

Eddie glared into the void before powerwalking to the freezer and coming back with an ice pack that he placed between your legs. 

“Did I hurt you? Tell me the truth, Y/N.”

“You…you’ve been a bit more aggressive with me than you used to be…”

“Fuck—”

“Eddie, it’s ok—”

“It’s not ok! Listen, we’re going to come up with a safe word. That way you can get my attention and I can immediately stop. I wish you had said something…”

“I didn’t want to hurt you or make you feel bad.”

“No, sweetheart, you could never…just…promise me that you’ll be more open about…everything. I’m still kind of figuring it all out again…life, you know?”

It took some time but you finally found your rhythm again. He was able to walk that line of soft and firm while making your eyes roll till you came screaming his name. 

“Just like that, Eddie, fuck.”

You whimper with need, glancing beside you to notice his fist grip the sheets as he rolls his hips pushing his cock deeper into you till you practically feel him in your stomach. 

“Cum, baby.”, he grunts into your ear. “Mmph—M’not gonna last much longer. You feel too good. S-So fucking tight.”

Your nails softly trail up his neck to the back of his head making him shudder in pleasure as his pant warms your skin. 

“Cum inside me.”

Your head turns toward him as his eyes shoot open and his pace falters for a moment. 

“Are you…are you sure?”

“More than ever, Eddie, please. Cum for me. Cum WITH me.”

You feel his face scrunch as he whines and his arms slide between you and the mattress to hold you close as his release paints your walls. Never feeling this from him before your pussy fluttered around him and his hooded eyes watched as the coil snapped within you. 

His hips were still lazily thrusting, giving you all he had as you both tried desperately to catch your breaths. 

“Are you ok?”, he whispered as you exhaustedly nodded. “I’ve never cum inside you before. It…it felt like heaven. Everything about you is heaven.”

It took him a moment but it was then he realized that you were trying to hold back tears. 

“Hey, hey, hey. What…what’s wrong? Fuck, I was too rough again, wasn’t I? I told you to tell me!”

As he starts to push up off your body, your limbs promptly hold him still. 

“No, you weren’t…weren’t too rough. I’m sorry I just…I love you so much.”, you cry. “I know you worry about how…how all this affects me but, baby, I hate how it affects you.”

You don’t see it but his eyes close as he sighs and his heart breaks. 

He hates seeing you in pain. 

He saw it when your parents scolded you for dating “the town freak” or when you were let go from your job in town because they needed to downsize. He saw it in your eyes when he told you he signed up for service and when he finally had to let you go to get on the plane to fly to what would be his new home overseas. 

He heard it in your voice when you two would talk over the computer and it would crack when you told him how much you missed him. He read it in your writing when you would send letters begging him to stay safe and reminding him how much you loved him. 

Eddie felt it when his fingers twitched, feeling something sweaty in his palm before opening his eyes to realize he was in the hospital with you clinging to his hand by his side. When you watched every wince during his physical therapy and afterward helped him with his stretches so his muscles would reawaken. 

When he had his night terrors and his hands flew to your throat… a new regret he could never take back…

Silently, your husband made sure you were secure around him as he lifted you up and carried you to the bathroom, whispering soft comforts in your ear as he pet your hair and started a bath. 

Once the porcelain was full, he tapped your shoulder and you let him go as you climbed in before he did the same placing himself behind you. Calloused palms rub your arms and shoulders as he leaves gentle kisses along your skin. 

“On Monday, I’ll talk to my doctor about what happened and about some other recommendations he may have when it comes to those triggers. I also want to talk to Wayne…tell him he’s going to be a grandpa soon.” 

Eddie smiles when he hears you giggle. 

“Y/N…thank you…for everything you do. I know you didn’t sign up for all this but, Jesus, I don’t know what I’d do if you weren’t here. I love you so much to.”

Craning your neck, you kiss his lips as his arms pull you back against his chest. 

“I signed up a life with you, Eddie, and no matter what happens I’ll always be here for you…freak.”

You smile wide as he snorts out a laugh and playfully tickles your side. 

These were the moments you hung on to, the moments he was at peace and happy. Anything that follows, you’d handle together because he deserved that…to live his best life with his wife and future little family. 

#################

[scoobydoodean]

what is your opinion on people calling dean a heavy misogynist? i don’t agree personally but i feel like you could put my thoughts into better words

First, I have to chuckle a little at "heavy misogynist". Apparently, some people have begun to realize their fave is also guilty of misogyny crimes therefore they focus on making sure all of us know Sam is a light misogynist and Dean is a heavy misogynist. I just find that amusing.

This is a broad topic in a long show, so I won't endeavor to address every conceivable incidence of misogyny in the show I can think of. Instead, I'm going to create a few headings, at least one of which I think most criticism falls under.

Misogyny through the writing team

How Sam's misogyny gets a pass

Purity culture wank and Dean performing for Sam

How Dean actually treats women

Misogyny Through The Writing Team

First, Supernatural in of itself has issues with misogyny—as in, the writers of the show (including female writers) have issues with misogyny which they are happy to put on display semi-frequently. The show started in 2005, during a period of time where casual sexism was absolutely rampant on TV and no one thought anything about it. Female celebrities were regularly mocked and dragged on cable television in a way men simply weren't. They were called bitches and skanks and whores, and even "progressive" voices were inundated with casual misogyny and a fixation on purity culture (that largely applied to women only). Quite simply, I think fandom tends to be far too generous toward the writers, assuming certain things were "flaws" the writers intentionally wrote for the characters.

Put another way, there are some criticisms I prefer to level at the writing team rather than the characters, because what is written plainly reflects their ignorance in the real world rather than any intent to give Sam or Dean or any other character meaningful flaws—much less outright terrible ones that greatly harm their image. I'll give a few examples:

2.17 "Heart" makes me very uncomfortable as I sit here in 2024 and observe how Sam and Madison's romance develops. Me feeling that way does not mean the authorial intent of 2007 Sera Gamble was that I think to myself, "Man Sam comes off as uncomfortably rapey here." Hopelessly bad with women, perhaps—but not creepy.

In season 2, the writers begin to develop a running “joke” that Sam is afraid of not just clowns but also little people. The latter “joke” is (wisely) dropped fairly quickly. I have never criticized Sam for being afraid of little people, and I never will. It is readily apparent to me that this running "joke" reflects the ignorance of the writing team rather than an intent to give Sam meaningful or interesting flaws. Their intent was to use little people as the butt of a joke. I personally find this "joke" distasteful, and the idea of trying to take that and somehow "dunk" on Sam for the bigotry of the writers is more distasteful to me.

This is also how I feel about the running "joke" of a porn magazine and website (BAB) that solely features Asian women, that is put on display on multiple occasions during the show—first in 2.15 "Tall Tales", where the context is Gabriel infecting Sam's laptop with a virus from the website and making him believe Dean is responsible. BAB continues to make "Easter Egg" appearances in the show afterward. While often associated with Dean by fandom, the writers clearly think of BAB as a general, "funny" (it isn't), running gag with no more depth than "haha men like porn funny". An issue is stolen by a sentient teddy bear in 4.08 "Wishful Thinking". An issue is owned by the teenager who swapped bodies with Sam in 5.12 "Swap Meat". The Men of Letters also collected a considerable number of issues (8.17). I simply do not believe the writers thought for a single moment about BAB being a grossly racist gag. They most certainly did not write it as an intentional criticism of Dean from that perspective. It reflects nothing but their ignorance and racism here in the real world, and absolutely SHOULD be criticized from that REAL WORLD impact.

How Sam's misogyny largely gets a pass

One of the things I have not been able to stop noticing on this rewatch is Sam's issues with misogyny, and how often Sam's misogyny comes out in conflicts with Dean... starting from the very first episode of the show. Pretty much any time you get anything that feels like it might be a misogynist Dean or horn dog Dean moment... Sam either just has or is about to follow that up with some misogyny of his own.

In 1.01, right after entering Sam's apartment and meeting Jess, Dean mentions the Smurfs on Jess's shirt. We think to ourselves "Okay. A little misogynist... a little horn-dog Dean." Sam is happy to 1-Up that in two ways. First, Jess voices her intentions to go get dressed. Dean dismisses this, but while doing so, makes it clear he intends to leave the room with Sam, as he'd like to have a private conversation with Sam anyway. Sam objects, walking over to Jess and putting an arm around her, demanding Dean say whatever he needs to say right then and there. Maybe this would feel supportive if Jess wasn't in her underwear and hadn't just made it clear that now that the panic over a possible break-in is over, she'd really like to not be in her underwear in front of a stranger. But nope. By god she needs to stand there so Sam can prove a point about misogynist Dean! Second, Sam immediately (and I think quite erroneously) jumps to imply Dean is trying to cut Jess out of the conversation because she's... a woman? Or... something? He makes a big show of moving over Jess and standing beside her, saying anything Dean has to say, he can say in front of Jess. However, the moment Sam actually understands that Dean is here because John is missing on a hunting trip, he dismisses Jess to speak to Dean alone... because he's lying to her. By painting Dean erroneously with this "The men are talking" bullshit that had nothing to do with anything, Sam sets himself up to be viewed as a misogynist by his own framing of the situation and what it means to leave Jess out of a discussion. He also reveals his own alleged principles as a performative illusion. Despite being his intended life partner, Sam never intends to tell the woman he loves about his past as a hunter (he makes this clear later on the bridge). However, I think because Sam's actions usually co-occur with what gets called out more directly or more immediately recognized as misogyny from Dean (should have gotten him for the Smurf's comment, Sam!) Sam's misogyny often flies under the radar... and he's really... pretty bad.

I spoke here at length about how Sam tends to look down on women who interact with Dean (often before meeting them). There is absolutely an intersection with purity culture here and there's discussion in that thread about that as well, and whether this is a "2000s writers" issue or intentionally written flaws.

In 1.06, Sam cuts Dean off before Dean can accept an offered beer from Rebecca, but then as soon as Sam needs Rebecca out of the room, Sam asks her to not just bring them those beers... but also fix them sandwiches. Rebecca says, "What do you think this is, Hooters?" and Dean mumbles, "I wish" and we somehow lose sight of the fact that Sam literally just asked a woman to make him sandwiches which is possibly the number one misogynist man trope. Sam vaguely suggests Dean is a misogynist in 1.19 for nudging Sam to go on a date with Sarah Blake and possibly get information on the case, because that would be "using" her, but Sam wants to "use" Meg Masters in 1.22 and he wants to "use" Ruby to get what he wants, and when he said getting information from women was "Dean's job", he was also showing he was perfectly willing to use Dean and Sarah—he just doesn't want to get his hands dirty. It also comes to light in 1.19 that this is more about Sam's belief that he has to protect women from him, and Sarah herself ends up calling Sam antiquated for it.

I mentioned before that Sam doesn't plan to ever tell Jess who he is, and he makes the same plans with Amelia. Dean, meanwhile, confides in Cassie (it's what leads to their breakup) as well as Lisa.

I also have to mention... one of the funniest things I see deancrit samgirls in particular dig at time after time after time is Dean calling women "bitches". Never mind that Sam also calls women like Ruby and Bela bitches and calls a woman a bitch in front of Madison. Apparently none of these occurrences count because... *looks at notes* reasons. "Bitch" only counts as misogyny when it's Dean saying it. Also, let's not mention that Sam exclusively uses the word "bitch" to refer to women, while Dean also calls men and creatures bitches at different points so it isn't a gender specific insult for him.

Dean is definitely the "heavy" misogynist here... right? (I guess Sam is a "tall" misogynist instead).

Purity culture wank and Dean performing for Sam

Dean is commonly treated in fandom as if he's some kind of sex pest, and quite blatantly... he isn't one. Women almost always proposition Dean first (thejabberwock has sets on this here and here), but him asking people out also isn't inherently creepy in any way? Co-occurring with Sam's purity culture inundated judgements, we often see fandom's own as well, where Dean is some kind of sex pest because he... likes women? Or... because he has sex with consenting women who also want to have sex with him? Sometimes it's giving purity culture wank, sometimes it's given big radfem energy... but regardless, I sometimes see people talk about Dean like him so much as making eye contact with a woman is a violent sexual threat, and that's just laughable—as is denying the agency and autonomy of consenting women in general.

Even though it doesn’t matter in the grand scheme of things, I'll also add that Dean... doesn't even actually have sex with the frequency that people talk about it? Dean has sex with Cassie—who was a long term partner of his in 1.13. He has sex with an actress in 2.18, and with Doublemint twins in 3.01. He has sex with a waitress 4.05. He plans to have sex with someone in 3.04, but turns her down when he realizes she's a prostitute who's working. This happens again in 10.07. I'm on season 4 of my rewatch and haven't been formally keeping up... but Dean is not actually having a lot of sex? We get implications he's been out partying a few times, and can maybe infer he scored, but we don't actually know.

I'm not a huge fan of performing Dean, in the sense that I think over the years I have seen it wildly overstated far too many times. But I do think Dean sometimes plays a character for Sam especially. Dean tells us this himself in 2.03 "Bloodlust" when confiding in Gordon. He never says so directly when it comes to the sexy sex guy doing sex persona, but his actions reveal him. One can think of plenty of examples of Dean saying horny stuff about women to Sam... but what about his actions?

How Dean actually treats women

Finally, there's how Dean actually treats women... and one would be very hard pressed to prove to me that Dean is sexist toward the women in his life. He's been close friends with multiple women and worked with women on hunts on multiple occasions and never once batted an eye. Jo in 2.06 is sometimes floated as an example, but it's actually discussed within the episode. Dean makes it very clear that he thinks women can do the job just fine. What he has a problem with is Jo's lack of experience and her romanticization of the job (especially during a period where Dean has fallen deeply out of love with the job himself). Everything we see as the series progresses supports Dean's assertion as truth. He's very good friends with Charlie, Jody, and Donna and doesn't go around excluding them on hunts while favoring men. That is not a thing that happens. While he initially tries to talk Claire out of the life (as he does everybody—this is not unique to women—see Adam for example) when she decides to hunt, he supports her regardless. There is nothing uniquely overprotective about how Dean treats women who hunt. End of. Dean has no illusions about traditional gender roles or any of that nonsense, jumping to clean dishes after dinner at Jody's and cooking breakfast for Lisa and Ben. (Our knowledge of Dean and the chores he does for his family already tell us this—but regardless). Even Demon Dean, an entity with no love for anyone and close to zero principles, targeted men who abuse and threaten women, and when Crowley ordered him to kill Lester's wife to fulfill the terms of Lester's demon deal, Demon Dean instead became so deeply annoyed with Lester's hypocrisy (he cheated on his wife first) and his assertion that it's different when men cheat, that he killed him and smiled while doing it.

So anyway, nope—I don't think Dean is a "heavy" misogynist.

[winchestermysterymachine]

what happens when a winchester makes you juno?

Dean Winchester

although you're both super careful, there comes a time in dean's life when he just really wants one. just one baby, and after trying for so long, it finally happens. you're pregnant! he's doing everything in his power to not let his fears get the best of him. the reminder of who john winchester was haunts his mind every day like a never ending storm, but the minute he sees the baby, he knows he's not gonna let his past affect his future as a father. he wouldn't let you hold the baby for longer than an hour (unless you're feeding it). he doesn't let you hold the baby cause he wants you to rest as much as possible. he takes care of every dirty diaper, plays with it, shows it his favorite shows. he's falling asleep with the baby on his chest way too often. i kinda think he's a girl dad not gonna lie. being a girl dad and being a boy dad is so different. the minute he realizes it's a girl, he's already swearing off boys for the rest of her life. no man will get close to his precious baby girl. of course he worries a lot that the monsters of the world are going to come after his baby, so that will mean less hunting for you after baby girl's born. he was tempted to name her mary, or something to do with his own mother, but it just didn't fit him anymore, so he lets you pick the name. her middle name ends up being mary anyway. during the pregnancy process, i can imagine him at the store with sam, just throwing everything into carts even if it doesn't look important, he's getting it. he will go grab you every single pregnancy craving you have. pickles and peanut butter? already stocked up. every fast food restaurant around the bunker knows his name, knows your order by heart. dean has to back off from meat for a while. one of your pregnancy symptoms had been the sensitivity to meat. there had been tons of times when you rolled over and glared at dean and told him he better to get a burger and not come back until he's fulfilled your request. but in the beginning, the scent or sight of meat make you sick. he likes that now that you are pregnant, you both can just relax together. aside from the fact that you're super sexy carrying his child, the mother glow is so real i promise. but now you can literally stay inside all day and watch all his favorite movies and songs. there isn't too much driving around, car sickness, so there's a few walks outside the bunker. up and down the gravel road. the day when you actually gave birth, he was running around like a chicken without a head i fear. it probably happened in a super funny way. he's just got home from a hunt, unpacking in the bucker with only sam. aside from himself, and sammy of course, the only person dean trusts you to be alone with is castiel. i can imagine the two of you at the store getting some last minute snacks for the baby who's about to pop out of you, when dean's phone is ringing and you heaving and requesting his presence at the birth of his first born child. he's running around, collecting stuff for the bag and shouting nonsense. sam has enough and reaches over, smacking him across the face in a way only sam would be allowed to do. and he's like dude 'get your fucking shit together' and dean's okay again. he's by your side as soon as he gets into the hospital. castiel making sure to stay close by incase there's a lot of damage from childbirth, but overall it's probably the safest childbirth anyone's ever seen. now with the baby finally here, she's just the cutest. dean, who once worried if he'd turn out like his dad immediately throws that thought out the window and promises to himself he's never gonna treat her like a soldier. his whole entire life changed in the span of nine months and he couldn't ever imagine a life without you or baby girl in it again. he's a lot more calculated once he sees her while he's away on his missions. no more going in blind. he couldn't imagine dying and leaving you both alone. of course he did make cas and sam promise that if something happened to him,they wouldn't let you or baby suffer too much, and that they'd look after you.

all in all, my heart is breaking knowing that he never got to actually have a real family and a child, but in my mind he's very happy with his wife and baby girl. as she grows up, there's a lot dean gets to learn from her. he learns about the important of high heels, and flowers. he learns that his sass will be carried down through generations to come. he probably teachers her self defense rather quickly. he knows being a girl in this world comes with a lot of vulnerabilities, and it isn't just about monsters. nothing makes him more proud than when she's at the playground and kicks an older boys ass so bad the dudes mom comes over to complain. sure he'll reprimand his daughter while in front of the dudes mom, but as soon as they leave the park he's treating her to ice cream. he just wants to make sure she's not gonna let people walk all over her. he teaches her to be brave, have fun, and to stick up for the little guys; something dean's own father never would have been able to teach him. 

"If you love me right, then who knows? I might let you make me Juno."

Sam Winchester

sam is a boy dad. and i'm not just saying that cause he ends up being a boy dad, but it's because he needs to experience all those thing's dads are supposed to do with their boys. playing baseball, and football, and teaching them the right way on how to be a real man. he's giving you massages as much as you need. there's a lot more cooking on his end than usual. he just loves you sitting in bed, yelling at the characters on the tv while you eat the chocolate you've been craving. he handles mood swings like a pro. he always has tissues in his back pocket in case you see something that makes you cry. thinking about how sam was able to have a real bond with his son actually crushes me bad. definitely wasn't named after john, and was named after dean, who was touched of course. he too would be so protective over you two and hunts wouldn't really be something you attended anymore. he's definitely doing a lot of research on pregnancies too, seeing everything from your point of view will make it easier on him to help you out with carrying a baby. he's definitely the kind of guy to do that thing husbands do when the cup the bottom of the belly and lift it a little. everything about dean with the hunting is all very true too. he's so careful now, and he also makes dean and cas promise that if something happened to him they would take care of you and the baby. now the day the baby actually does arrive, you're both together, he's cooking dinner and as soon as you stand up to call it a night, your water breaks. he's hoisting you up bridal style and carrying you to the car. dean's probably like 'not the baby, not my baby!' but you just glare at him like 'dean this is childbirth!' and that shuts him up. dean's nervously driving in the front, speeding probably too much while you sit in between the boys, leaning on sam. he's coaching you through breathing exercises, and probably even timing how far apart the contractions are. he's read so much about pregnancy, he's so calm and collected whereas dean won't stop talking. sam is holding onto you, repeating that everything's gonna be okay. once you get to the hospital, dean drops you both off at the front while sam carries you into the hospital. dean drives around to park the car and calls castiel to come in. while the nurses make sure you're comfortable, sam walks around the hospital. usually hospitals give him the creeps from all the times he or dean have had to be in them, but the idea that you're just upstairs being prepped for labor makes hospitals seem a whole lot less scary. he goes to the gift shop, grabbing both you and the baby some sorta ugly trinkets, a stuffed bear for the boy, and for you a vase of flowers. he probably would have done better if everything didn't say 'get well soon' or 'feel better'. after meeting up with dean and cas, the trio finally head back upstairs where you are just about ready to push for the first time and sam kicks the boys out and says he'll get cas if thing's go wrong. the two disperse into the waiting room. sam continues to be supportive and helps you breath through everything. lots of gentle kisses and hands brushing your hair back into a ponytail or braid. as soon as the baby has been born, he's making sure you're doing okay while the nurses work on the boy. as soon as you're handed the baby for bonding time, sam's running out of the room and grabbing castiel and dean to come meet him for the first time. watching the three (now four) people he loves the most meet the newest addition to the winchester family warmed his little heart. this is genuinely something he deserved to see in his life and in my world, happened for sure. i think sam has a bigger chance of crying during the birthing process. he's just been through so much and worried about being a terrible father figure, but once again, seeing the baby it's like all his worries are thrown out the window and he knows he would never treat such an innocent baby like they weren't even human.

throughout the boys life, sam is making sure he's doing all he can to keep the kid out of the hunter's life of course he does want his child to keep himself safe in the off chance (cause the winchester family have monsters hunting them too). but he doesn't force them into thing's they're not ready for, shooting doesn't come until their teenage years, but thing's like properly handling guns and knives are learned early on. they're all around the bunker and the kids need to know how to properly handle that kind of thing. he also understands the some of the worlds scariest monsters aren't demons or vampires, but regular people. he teaches him to be smart, strong, observant. he teaches him everything his father never got the chance to.

"You know, I just might let you lock me down tonight. One of me is cute, but two, though?"

Castiel ; coming soon

castiel knew that you were pregnant six days before you knew. and in my perfect little world, angels and humans can have babies together, but the child is no more powerful than an average human, but with a little umpf ya know? anywhoo, so he doesn't need to sleep. one night after sex most likely, he's just holding you, watching as you fall asleep cause it's one of his favorite things. now he's running his fingers through your hair when he feels the subtle shift in texture. he notices the way you don't smell the same either, humans have a certain scent (similar to that one time castiel smelled the dead guy to see what disease he had or whatever it was). and for a moment, he's thinking it's your period. you hadn't started yet, and he's thinking that the shift in your pheromones are just that kind of feminine cycle. so he's about to press his hand against your head, clear any headaches, body aches, breast and back pain, and cramping you have when he feels it. a whole other life form. even though cas doesn't sleep, this information actually makes him restless. his brain won't stop running a million miles per minute and he's flying over to dean's bedroom and telling him. not you, dean. so then dean's like 'just give her a few days to realize she's pregnant, let her tell you, women like that kind of thing!' and cas is like 'okay :)!' so he waits. six whole days. meanwhile you on the other hand, you can feel the difference in yourself from the moment you had woken up the next day. your breast and back pain was a little bit different than periods, plus it wasn't your time for that either. you felt hungry, tired, a little moody, and slightly sick when dean made his burgers, bacon, and ate like a freak. thankfully, castiel didn't need to eat so he'd grab you some fruit and guide you back to your shared bedroom in the bunker, because if you had to watch all three boys eat, you'd probably kick them all out  of the bunker and keep the space for yourself. of course, this newfound sickness worried you and you took to the internet. of course the most common (and easiest) answer all doctors give their female patients when something is wrong with them, the answer was pregnancy. and for a second, you were absolutely angry, there's no way you were pregnant! but then thinking back to last month, there were a shit ton of times you and castiel hadn't come out of the bedroom for more than two days. so maybe you were pregnant. after borrowing one of the cars from the garage, you head to the gas station and pick up a couple pregnancy tests. they all come back positive of course, so you're mad again because false positives are real, so you go to castiel and you tell it to him straight that you want him to see if you're pregnant and he's like ! yes you are pregnant i already knew !. for a moment you're a little irritated that he's known for six whole days and didn't say anything, you could have saved the cash, saved the worrying with a simple answer he already knew. so anyways, he's always doing random check ups on baby girl. he's definitely a girl dad. i think he also tries to invite claire into your little family. he feels responsible for her, even when she doesn't want him to take care of her. castiel doesn't let you do anything. you are carrying his child, and he worries way too much. he also wants to take care of any and all pain you have using his angelic powers, but you don't want him too that much cause this is the most feminine thing ever, pregnancy, so you kinda wanna take everything in stride and be able to relate to the women before you, the mothers around you. you wouldn't even let him take care of the contraction pain either. the delivery process was the most simple though. you didn't need to go to a hospital, although you did anyway, you wanted her birth done right. so he, sam, and dean wondering around like lunatics, hurrying you off to the hospital. castiel stayed by your side the entire time, subtly helping you with the pain and healing every tear and mishap before it gets too bad.

i don't think castiel ever really worried about being a father. he doesn't really have one, or really know what that means. he relies on sam and dean a lot and thinks of them as family, so he definitely asks them what he's supposed to do now that she's here. you were asleep while castiel held your daughter for the first time. claire had been on her way but wouldn't arrive until later, so sam and dean did their best to explain father hood to him, at least what father hood is supposed to be. he definitely asks them both to make sure if something happened to him, they would make sure to keep claire, the baby, and you safe and they both promised. 

“You know I just might, let you lock me down tonight.”

so, what position are you getting juno'd in?

[shanastoryteller]

so, here's some long meta that no one cares about for 5.14 my bloody valentine and dean's relationship with sam's demon blood addiction

ok far be it for me to defend s5 dean, but i actually think the criticism of dean in 5.14 my bloody valentine is too harsh

the thing i think dean messed up on is not reassuring sam that his sudden desire for demon blood isn't his fault and he doesn't need to be ashamed of it because it's literally because of famine. the horseman is making everyone crave something so badly they kill themselves, including castiel, an actual angel of the lord who can't overcome his desire for red meat to the point that he's literally on all fours in front of famine scarfing down hamburger, not a care in the world while famine is getting read to eat a soul and do who knows what with dean

the thing is sam is so obviously embarrassed and ashamed, especially considering how earlier in the season dean was a huge dick about it, saying he couldn't trust if sam was really clean and didn't want it anymore, ect. if anything, the way sam reacts to the cravings, before they know what's going on, shows that he really had pretty much moved past it - even that low level of craving he had in the beginning was different enough to be noticeable.

the "i think i'm hungry for it" "hungry for what?" "you know." "demon blood? are you kidding me?" exchange is something else i see brought up - but i don't think dean is saying demon blood out loud to be a dick, to push the point and enforce sam's shame like i've seen people say about this moment. i think he's scared of sam's addiction and that jesus, are you fucking kidding me tone isn't really about sam

the thing is dean has decided that sam's addiction has made him a different person, that it wasn't really him and what he did while under the influence wasn't his fault. in 5.11 sam interrupted when they're telling the shrink about the apocalypse so they can get committed, dean says of sam starting the apocalypse, "my brother's not a bad guy, he was just high" and he could be just saying that, but if everything else they were saying was true, so i think this is too - this is how dean is rationalizing it. which is better than when he was saying sam was solely responsible for it, but it's still not great

it's just another way to absolve himself of responsibility and deny sam his autonomy

the thing is that demon blood is not portrayed as a 1:1 with real life substance addiction - it's actually portrayed to be much less damaging (something something about how sam managed to go off demon blood on his own, without the panic room, definitely once but possibly twice - after dean comes back from hell, and after killing lilith, but that's not what we're talking about rn), and sam's addiction doesn't seem to really change his personality. the only time this is even sort of true is when he's going through withdrawals, and even then it's an intense focus to get demon blood - and then he's back to baseline, which is not even a little bit how real addiction works

sam doesn't kill lilith because he's high. he kills lilith because that's been the goal the whole time, because he and dean were both led to believe that would stop the apocalypse, not start it. the tunnel vision revenge to kill lilith also isn't addiction related - i've talked about before how i think it's partially motivated by his desire to see if he really could have killed lilith and saved dean from his deal before, but beyond that - sam having tunnel vision revenge tendencies after someone he loves is taken from him is canon. see the entirety of season 1 after jessica. the only thing that snaps him out of it is the threat of losing dean in 2.01. this is just a facet of who he is

sam didn't go after lilith alone because he was high - it's because dean and bobby lied to him and betrayed him and locked him up and left him to die in the panic room. then when dean tracks him down again, despite sam very clearly not wanting him to do that, fresh off demon blood, he still asks dean to join him. he still wants to do this together. he doesn't want to fight. bobby warns dean to be good to sam, but he's so angry that he pushes and pushes sam until he throws a punch. after that first punch, sam hesitates. he still doesn't want to fight dean. he stands there, doing nothing, waiting to see what dean's going to do - hoping, maybe, that dean will do what he did back when dean lost his temper and punched sam in 2.03 - nothing. instead, dean starts up the fight again, and when sam leaves, throws dad's words back at him

dean talks about sam trusting a demon over his brother, but the thing is dean agrees to go after lilith with sam - as long as he leaves ruby behind, even though ruby is the one that knows where lilith is. also, he trusted an angel over his brother, and that sounds more reasonable on paper, but the the thing is they were both manipulated by ruby/cas.

the reason sam went after lilith alone is because that's what dean pushed him to do. it's not because he was high. saying it was about that absolves sam of his responsibility, sure, but it also absolves dean of the part he played too. worse, dean may say it, but sam knows better. he knows the demon blood doesn't effect him that way and you can see it on his face when dean says it. so he's stuck between not arguing against that and taking responsibility for his actions, something he's done over and over again and he clearly views as part of his penance, or saying something and risk rocking the tentative truce he has with dean, the brother he loves and really the only person he has left in the world. so of course he lets it lie

(a sympathetic interpretation of this is actually because dean doesn't know his voicemail was changed and the sam he knows wouldn't have still gone after lilith without him after receiving it - and he's right, which is why the angels changed it. so he has to justify it as sam being high, because it's the only way sam going after lilith after hearing him say they're still family and he shouldn't have said those things and he's sorry makes sense - but we've already veered off topic as is)

dean views sam's decision to leave him (his biggest fear/weakness) and his drinking of demon blood to be inextricably linked. additionally, sam has made it clear again and again how he doesn't want to be on demon blood anymore, and now he's craving it again. his first reaction is to tell cas to get sam out of here - but it's too late, because famine already infected him

dean is pretty clearly starting to panic here - it's right there in his voice, in the "then what do we do?" and in the look of desperate fear when he turns to face his brother when sam says "you go and cut that bastard's finger off" (which has the ring, the source of his power, and will get rid of everyone's cravings)

i will say i think this is actually a pretty nice moment for their relationship. sam tells him what to do, how to handle this - and dean pretty visibly calms down, turns to cas and says, "you heard him"

even while being pulled towards demon blood, he lets sam make the call. he doesn't insist cas take him somewhere else anyway, he doesn't dismiss sam of not being in his right mind - he does what sam says

which includes handcuffing him

sam is the one that asks to be restrained while dean and cas go after famine. he says to make it good, but dean only handcuffs him to the sink - i was like, come on, the teenagers that captured sam in 5.12 do a better job of tying him up than that

then dean and cas go after famine and cas is too busy shoving hamburger down his throat to do anything and there's like a dozen demons and a literal horseman in front of him. dean's screwed

except famine sent demons after sam, who kills them and drinks their blood. this is not anymore sam than the virgin who ate her lover was herself or the guy who hadn't had alcohol in 20 years and then drank himself to death was himself. sam so far had resisted his cravings in their entirety, not even licking the blade with demon blood, no matter how clearly he wanted to, which is something no one else has been shown able to do

sam shows up, mouth still bloody, and dean's horrified. famine says that sam has nothing to fear and offers him the blood of the dozen demons surrounding them while dean begs him not to do it

cas, mr "i'm an angel, i can stop whenever i want to" is still eating meat off the ground at this point. that's how powerful famine's pull is. and cas's craving is just based on his vessel liking red meat

sam says no

he uses his powers to pull the demons out of the vessels, making their blood useless to him. famine eats the souls instead and sam uses his powers to pull all the souls that famine has eaten out of him, leaving him powerless. sam's powers saving the day again (samhain, alistair) but it's a power he didn't want to use - a power he wouldn't have needed to use, if castiel had a will equal to his own

the next scene is the one people tend to judge dean for pretty harshly, but i'm going to offer a counterargument to that

sam's in the panic room again while dean and cas are outside. i do think a sam that asked to be locked down and refused famine pulling at him drink demon blood did go in there willingly, while he was still in his right mind - before the withdrawal hits. he's calling out - saying "no, please! don't! dean! cas! are you there? dean, help me!"

cas says, "that's not him in there. not really." dean says, "i know" and cas tries to say that sam just has to get it out of his system, then he'll be - and dean walks away, saying he needs some air

a lot of people take dean and cas's exchange to mean that once again sam isn't sam when he's on demon blood - when he's high - and leaving him to suffer alone as a form of punishment/weakness

but i don't think so - and i'm pretty hard on s5 dean's treatment of sam

the thing is, sam just refused famine and pointedly didn't give in to his cravings when cas did. he saved dean, choosing him over demon blood, the thing that in dean's view he hadn't done before

and dean is powerless to do anything for him in return

i think sam is hallucinating in the panic room just then, just like he did the first time. and just like before, when he's hallucinating and detoxing he's using his powers, throwing things around the room. there's no reason to think this time is any different than last time. which means 1. even if dean or cas were in there, there's a decent chance sam wouldn't be able to tell. and 2. it's not safe for them, or at least dean to be in there. maybe cas could, but he's low on mojo and frankly i think sam's powers are strong enough to knock an angel around pretty good if he wanted to

sam's not asking to be let out. he's asking for his brother (which is actually another good sign for their relationship, i think, because last time he hallucinated dean saying he hates him and this time, even addled, he believes that dean would be there and helping him if he could) and i think it's pretty clearly killing dean that he can't go and help him. it's actually specifically because sam isn't asking to be let out that i think the hallucination/powers explanation makes more sense than anything else, because if dean being in there really would provide some sort of comfort to sam, i think he'd be there. there's not really an explanation for why he wouldn't that tracks with the rest of his behavior this episode

when he gets outside, he tosses his drink aside and cries. he prays to the god he doesn't believe in "please. i can't... i need some help. please?"

dean doesn't suffer from any cravings because of famine and famine tells him that's because he's dead inside. this is very obviously not true. one, because dean has show real enjoyment in food and drink and sex in previous episodes so deciding right at this moment that it doesn't exist doesn't really make any sense, and for another - sam is, as always, still able to pull emotions from him that he's shoved down. hell, if anything, famine should have given him a craving for his brother and dean should have spent the whole episode trying to not lie on top of him like a cat

(my personal explanation for this that isn't bad writing is that dean's real craving is just for some numbness, that he's tired of feeling everything he's repressing all the time - and then when famine discovers he's here he purposely doesn't pull any deeper as a way to fuck with dean's head, to break his spirit, to make him that much more likely to say yes to michael and give them the apocalypse they want so badly)

dean is so low at this moment i think because he couldn't protect sam, couldn't help him, and it's a canon component of his character that failing to protect/save sam is gutting for him (shtriga and cold oak as stand out examples but also, like, see: the whole damn show)

he locked sam up and left him helpless for when demons come after him. watch his face when he famine says he sent the demons for sam to consume - it's panichorrorguilt. sam asked him to do it, it's not his fault, but he put those handcuffs on sam and he blames himself for it. then sam has to save his ass using his powers, again, and dean can't do anything but listen to him suffer

sam did the thing that dean asked of him, he picked dean over demon blood, first by asking to be restrained and sending them after famine, then again when he refuses to drink the demons famine offers him

and dean couldn't do anything for him

he couldn't stop the demons that famine sent to his brother, he couldn't stop famine in time to make sam's artificial cravings go away, he can't even help his brother when he's calling out for him

sam trusted him and he failed

(i do not actually think this is his fault - what was he supposed to do? he did everything he could. it just wasn't enough. but even if it wasn't in dean's nature to blame himself for things he shouldn't - and not blame himself for things he should - the cold facts of the situation are crushing enough)

what's he supposed to do now?

they stopped famine. it should be a victory. this is a battle won in the war of stopping the apocalypse. but dean breaks down in a way the actual losses haven't pulled from him because dean of the one track mind really only has one concern, one question, and in that area, this was a loss, not a victory

how does he save his brother?

[diceig]

It probably has already been talked about, but. The lost boys are special, they are set apart from other typical horror movie antagonists because they care about each other. They love each other.

This is proven by three moments;

1. You killed Marko!

The Frog brothers are a target for Paul. Reasons could have been; they were a danger to Paul, or they had simply gotten Paul's attention by getting close to him. This line proves otherwise. Paul does not want to kill the Frog brothers for himself, but as an act of vengeance for Marko. One of the other boys death affected him enough to push him to do something about it.

2. David's reaction

Let's go through the scene;

Marko is staked.

The other three boys are woken up, David screams "You're dead meat!"

He chases the Frog brothers and Sam up to where the sun shines. David gets burnt and has to let them go. He screams and lets go.

One tear falls from his eye. He laughs, "Tomorrow."

The first thing to note is how David doesn't laugh right away. It doesn't match his behavior in his previous hunting scene, where he laughed before going to kill. Instead, he screams. The laugh he gives in the end is also far from what it usually is. It's not loud or joyous.

Like with the previous point, it could be taken as David defending himself, and the tear could be thought to be of pain. But, narratively, the tear isn't necessary to tell he suffered from the burn, he already reacted. A new information it could give would be sadness, or shock, which would be towards the death of Marko.

3. The boys looking for eachother

This is the first scene of the movie, which is used to set the tone and the plot of the movie. It is also the boys' introduction, in which relationships and personalities are explained to the viewer in the most efficient way possible.

David comes first, as the leader. He looks around and sets the path for the other three. Dwayne and Paul follow, and they both turn towards the lasts, with a smile. This explains that the Boys don't just hang out because it's convenient or because they have too, they actively want to stay together. Dwayne and Paul make sure everybody is following and sticking close.

This genuine care the boys have for eachother is the most important reason for why people like them so much as characters. It gives the boys a deeper dynamic, a feeling of group instead of staying individuals.

It also gives dimension to the characters. They cannot be simple animalistic killers with the only desire to stay alive, since they love. This opens a gate. What else do they feel? How 'human' are they? Since so little is seen of the boys, it's free to be intrepreted and imagined as anyone wants.

In short, the boys are brothers <33333 and that's why everyone loves them.

[sdv-confessions]

Sending an ask with regards to the anon that said Sam/ Penny didn't make sense to them.

Not a shipper myself but I do know one of the main reasons is opposites attract but another, and a personally, more compelling reasons is that on the surface they seem like opposites but their more alike than they appear. And oh boy am I gonna go off about them.

Again not a shipper but I do like it when fics and general creatives explore how Sam, despite not initially appearing as such, is burdened with the responsibility of growing up a bit too fast because of the absence of a parent. Obviously this is about Kent and how he never really raised Vincent and even when he was there, he wasn't fully there or Vincent was too young to remember. Not Kent's fault obviously but it still left a noticeable absence in a male guiding figure that Vincent needed after being comfortable with one. And Sam, initially would try and prop his dad up, making him out to be a good father who was serving the country. He's out there kicking Gotoro butt. But as the years passed by of Kent not coming home, gradually Sam became more responsible for Vincent in the prior role. He probably taught him how to ride a bike, or tie his shoelaces and other activities and skills traditionally taught by a father.

Fics tend to explore this more reserved side of Sam that a general chunk of the fandom isn't aware of. Cause the cutscene that presents this more complex side of Sam is one of the only truly missable cutscenes of the entire game (the year 1 beach scene with the perfect circumstances). So general concensus is that Sam is an aloof skateboarder who kinda takes his job seriously and has his head in the clouds dreaming of becoming a popular musician. That's what's presented with most cutscenes and dialogue of Sam.

Penny, however, contrasts this image completely with honestly more grounded cutscenes. You can tell she's a hopeful person trying to make the best of the hand she's been dealt. And everybody knows she was forced to be the adult when Pam spiraled into alcoholism and negligence. And Penny herself admits she does the cooking, she does the cleaning. She takes care of the family by herself. And she's been doing this, presumably, since she was a child.

Penny's circumstances and character (doting and anxious but hopeful) make her maturity levels leagues above Sam's. But that's an assumption based on Sam being the loopy golden retriever stereotype (but he is a good boy, one of the best). And when you base their relationship purely on that, it is opposites attract.

But then that would be focusing on the surface and to get to the true meat and potatoes of the ship, you gotta dig deeper.

With Sam, once you include both the fact he was Vincent’s important male figure/ role model AND the fact that he's a silly goofy guy as previously mentioned, the ship gets so much more interesting. You also have to include the fact that Penny isn't all doom and gloom. She knows how to have fun and can be relaxed. Examples of this would be the picnic, the recipe testing and especially her 10 Heart event cause that shows she can be a bit adventurous.

And they both share a similarity in how they utilise their passions and hobbies as an escape from their circumstances. Penny primarily reads for the sake of escapism. Sam plays the guitar and writes his own lyrics, most likely to express his frustrations (I admit this is a bit of a stretch. I'm spitballing here). And both have an oddly nurturing nature to them. When married Sam is a children's edutainment performer, a job he's extremely proud of, therefore showing he has said caring nature and love for children. Penny is the town's sole educator for Jas and Vincent and has admitted their resources are limited with regards to educating the two. And yet she takes them out for educational field trips, that are most likely unnecessary but she's aware that even if they are, they're fulfilling experiences for the children. They both have a passion for caring for children, going the extra mile for them (I especially commend Sam, as I do have experience with being a musical children's edutainment performer and to genuinely go through with it takes serious mental fortutude unironically).

In most SamPenny content and to my understanding, the ship thrives in how they contrast yet compliment each other well. Sam can relate to Penny's struggle of being forced to grow up too fast, having to fill in for somebody who should be but isn't there (I still love Kent, this is more for Penny's dad and Pam specifically). And in some depictions, he comforts her on it. And in Canon, he would do exactly this as seen with Year 1 Beach Scene (that beach scene is the glue for this entire argument). And Penny could educate on new topics as Sam is a curious person in general.

And another opposites attract element that I really like about them that I rarely see being explored is how their weather dialogue reflects this so well. When it rains, Penny's dialogue is gloomy and distant. She doesn't like the rain, seeing it as unpleasant and an environmental reminder of her home life and how washed out and depressing it is. Meanwhile, directly opposite her trailer, Sam is happy as can be because he gets to play his guitar as loud as he wants. A genuinely optimistic view of the weather. A good contrast with Penny's more depressive perspective. And this does apply vice versa.

To me, their relationship can be summarised as this: Sam is the sliver of sunshine on a cloudy day and Penny is gentle breeze to cool one on a blistering summer day. Penny acts as the unexpected calm to Sam's chaotic storm whilst Sam shows Penny the beauty and positivity in even the most seemingly negative of scenarios. When there's excess of one, the other balances it out. They comfort each other in their pain, they lift each other up when down. They can choose to indulge the other's interest for the sake of feeling fulfilled by their partner's apparent excitement when discussing their passion etc.

In conclusion to this silly little rant for a ship that isn't even in my top 20 Stardew ships, nevermind otp: he was a skater boy, she was a scholarly girl, could I make it more obvious?

.

[ananke-xiii]

I like "My Bloody Valentine" just like any other SPN fan because, well, it's a cool episode, let's face it. What I like about it the most, however, might differ from the vast majority because I'm obsessed with the Cas/Jimmy/Sam/Lucifer parallels.

Cas/Jimmy and Sam fall prey to Famine because they're ambitious characters at their very core and ambition goes hand in hand with appetite, the main theme of the episode. Cas and Sam also have some issues when it comes to pride because they sometimes have an excess of it (hybris). Which, of course, since S4-5 are about Lucifer who "sinned" because of his pride, makes the two the most Lucifer-like characters (even more than Lucifer himself, at least the SPN version) of the series.

They're ambitious not just because they crave power for power's sake but because, secretly, they want to explore their limits, which means they want to go beyond their limits. Maybe there's also something to be said about wanting to prove their faith by accepting the unknown into their lives but I'll have to think about it.

Now, of course, things are different for the two of them because well, for instance, Sam is a human who thinks that his ambition is a sin he needs to get rid of. Also, appetites for humans are a hell of a problem. Hence, the imposed need of getting restrained, handcuffed, and eventually imprisoned.

Like Sam, Cas, too, tries to keep a rigid control over himself and his impulses. Like Sam (who has Bobby and Dean as his "wardens"), Cas, too, is actively controlled and monitored by Heaven. Unlike Sam, Cas doesn't need to get imprisoned because his own mind is a prison in almost the literal sense of the word because of Heaven's brainwashing and mind control. But in Cas' case things are a bit more complex because of Jimmy. "There were three of us in this marriage, so it was a bit crowded."

Apart from Heaven and from "himself", there's aslo Jimmy in Cas so this episode also shows one important thing: the body of the vessel, provided that the stimulus is impactful enough, can overcome the angel "inside". Not the mind, the body. The body which angels don't have.

And this is why Jimmy resurfaces in this episode to show that "the vessel" can gain momentary control... even by means of total loss of control. Which is, of course, not the same exact thing that happens to Sam (or there wouldn't be any "surprise" at all) with Lucifer but the principle remains the same, what changes is that it's not about gaining control back via kilos upon kilos of red meat or infinite gallons of demon blood but via the power of love, the memories of a lived life, the connections that are made along the way. The body remembers, in a way.

Also Jimmy, just like Sam, was a, very secretly, highly ambitious man. It's not a coincidence that both Jimmy and Sam will say "yes" to being possessed because, as much as the show frames it as bad (and, I mean, I can't say it isn't by the way they put it), what's more ambitious, aka what screams more "go beyond your limits", than taking your hands off the wheel? Cede control, merge with the Other, lose yourself completely. It's a seductive thought that also shows that one has faith in themselves (or one is proud enough) to think that they can go see what's beyond the fence, can actually go there. That they can make it.

And since SPN s4-5 are seasons of prophecies... who was the famous prophetess who was cursed by her own god because she didn't cede control, she didn't merge with and completely lose herself with him? Of course it's Cassandra. Which in SPN terms is Dean. Which also means, in this reading of mine, that the emptiness inside of Dean doesn't mean that he's "dead inside" but that he lacks ambition and pride. No, let's say it better: that he has a super strict control over his own ambition and his own pride, perhaps that he's actually scared of them because to have an ambition means to be willing to take risks, to fly without parachute thinking that the net will appear, if you will. Taking risks means playing with the gods, playing to be one with the gods and Sam and Cas are way more fascinated by this idea than Dean is. Or maybe they're just less dominated by fear because of their hybris.

What I'm trying to say is that yes, the episode is about sex and appetites but appetite pertains to ambition as well and to the charm and sexiness that radiate from power, control and the lack thereof.

[thollandneedy]

Photobooth- Tom Holland

A/n: I had this idea for so long, like, not even kidding.

Warnings: Explicit language; hot make out between T.H, Y/n and Z

Summary: Y/n it's tired of the media commeting on her relationship, then she decides to break the internet

Don’t forget to share, like, comment and leave your ideas here

Bellah’s Masterlist 🪻

“ Fuck me,” Y/n complains, throwing his cell phone on the armchair next to him in the living room.

The woman put her hands to her face, pulling it down in discontent. It wasn't the first time that the media had tried to destroy her image because she was dating a Hollywood star, who coincidentally is making a movie in which the famous actress Zendaya is taking part. From comments on her Instagram posts to people in the street when they saw her walking with her boyfriend and taking the dogs for a walk. All she heard was: “You're stealing him from her”.

Zendaya and Y/n were friends, and there was no relationship of jealousy or dispute over Holland, but the media always made it seem like they were in a constant fight for the attention of the year's hottest new thing, Thomas Holland.

“What's wrong?” Thomas approaches Y/n with a cup of tea in his hands and his hair in a mess. “It's seven in the morning, love. Let's not have another crisis over the building's wifi.”

“It's not the wifi.” The girl complains. “It's those… ugh.” The frustration is evident in her voice, and then her index finger points to the cell phone lying on the burgundy armchair next to the cream sofa.

The brunette bends down to pick up the cell phone, then reads the news out loud:

“Tom Holland and Zendaya Coleman. Off-screen romance? This afternoon, a photo of the two in a coffee shop in Los Angeles, California, was taken by fans who were present at the scene. According to the interviewees, the couple were talking about building a family and how they should improve their relationship. In 2019, Thomas Holland started dating his childhood best friend, Y/n L/n. Apparently, close sources say that they are going through a crisis in their relationship due to the fact that Holland has not yet asked her to marry him. This would have led to constant fights, and finally, a hidden romance with actress Zendaya Coleman. There has been no statement yet about these photos or the news being spread. Keep an eye out for more news, and leave us a comment on who you're most in love with.”

Thomas lowers his cell phone close to his face, letting a disgruntled grunt come out of the brunette's mouth.

“I didn't mind the comments on my photos before, or even the insults on Twitter, but this is too much!” The woman said dissatisfied, getting up from the sofa and heading towards the double bedroom.

“Love, I'm really sorry.” Holland tries to say. “We were going over the lines from the new movie, which, by the way, talks about building families and so on.” The brunette follows his girlfriend, managing to touch her fingers in an attempt to calm her down somehow.

“I know you were. I'm not suspicious of you, but these tabloids? What do they think I'm doing with my life?” The woman says, abruptly removing her pink pajamas with flowery details. “Fuck!”

“I can talk to my agent. Ask him to take down this report or even block the page for spreading fake news about us, me-” The actor follows her towards the closet.

“This isn't going to end any time soon. Not as long as people think there's a rivalry between the two of us, and you're the meat in the middle. We need something that really impacts people.” The girl opened her drawers, patiently picking out something she could wear to the gym.

“Like what? A text statement about the case. Or if you don't want to show up, I could choose someone to speak for us. Harry or Sam.” Holland tries to take charge of the situation, spreading his arms as a sign of disorientation. “Or we could post a photo together with a cheesy caption.

Y/n rests both hands between the clothes that have ended up in the drawer of gym tops, staring at nothing for a few seconds. The woman lifts her face, relaxing her tense shoulders and finally, having an enlightening moment, replies:

“I already know what I want to do, but you can't be jealous”

(…)

Weekends, for some, were a day of rest from a long day's work. But for the wealthy, it was synonymous with extravagant parties with big names used for networking or just getting a chance with people of great influence. The loud sound of the speakers positioned near the swimming pool of the large mansion meant that even from the water the pulse of the beat could be felt. The number of people started to become countless as soon as the clock struck ten. The various rooms were full of different activities, with the kitchen being the center of drinks and the living room the center of board games along with couples sitting on the sofa.

Thomas was drinking with some work colleagues, while admiring the expensive watches he wanted to buy one day to build a collection. While he seemed distracted, Y/n found himself in a group of women chatting about various subjects, in search of his real target. The brunette actress, with her hazel eyes and divine height, entered the room in a clingy dark blue dress and silver high heels, which didn't seem to affect her posture. Y/n focused his eyes on the actress, silently excusing himself from the women he was talking to and heading towards the brunette. Passing between the guests and the men who stared at her because of her provocative black outfit, Y/n's warm hands found the actress's back, touching it slowly

“Hi, Y/n!” Zendaya smiles as soon as she sees the image of the woman behind her, and greets her with a hug. “What's up? You look stressed.” “I'm fine actually.” Y/n comments, holding a drink in her hand and approaching the woman to say into her ear. “Can we talk in private?”

Zendaya narrows her eyes, with a confused face.

“Why?” The woman asks, only to receive a penetrating look in response.

The brunette decided to leave the conversation and follow in the footsteps of the woman in front of her, who was leading her towards a photo booth, where her boyfriend was already waiting for her, as if something was being planned between the couple. The actress smiled confusedly, sharing a look with Thomas, who was wearing a white dress shirt that showed off his muscles. The actor looked at his girlfriend, who stared at the actress determinedly, even though she was afraid of what she was about to do and ask.

“Did you see the news that came out this week? About our photo in the cafeteria?” Tom asked the woman, who quickly looked at him in confusion.

“Yes, I did. I'd asked them to take it down, but since the content of our conversation wasn't a lie, because we were talking about the script, they can't delete it. It wouldn't be considered fake news, just a double entendre because the teenagers who were watching us didn't know we were talking about the movie.” Zendaya loses her poise, crossing her arms and leaning against the photo booth door.

“I don't want you to take it off the air.” Y/n speaks up, taking a step forward. “I've had enough of all the times I've felt like a complete fraud, where we've all been the targets of lies and what they think we are.” Y/n says, expressing her discontent.

“We don't want to be talked about anymore. And that goes for you too.” Holland says to the actress leaning against the booth.

“Well?” The brunette asks, giving them room to explain what the plan is.

“We want to do worse. Something that's so surprising that it takes them by surprise and no one else will have any arguments to say about us. And I thought maybe we could get involved in something. The three of us.” Y/n approached the two of them, stepping into the middle of the small circle that had formed.

The air became dense, and their gazes hovered with the same density as a wave against the rocks of the sea. This had to end, and it would somehow, now.

“A sex scandal?” Holland frowns, wondering at his girlfriend's suggestive comment.

“I don't know yet. I was hoping you'd have better ideas than me.” Y/n is overcome by a lack of creativity.

Zendaya squints at the spot she was leaning on, and then an idea lights up her mind. The brunette turns away from the black wall and faces the booth, giving a smug smile as soon as it's finally possible to tangibly see what could put an end to all the rumors they've been suffering for the last few months. The brunette catches the eye of the couple who seemed lost, and then one of her hands finds the black velvet curtain used to cover the entrance to the cabin. Y/n silently agrees as soon as he sees the seductive smile of the woman in the blue dress.

Yes

That's what she wanted

Both women enter the cabin already feeling their bodies meeting each other, and then Thomas enters the cabin, closing the curtain behind him. The actors looked at each other as Y/n stood in the middle of them, feeling her breathing get heavier with each warm touch that found the waist of her body and the beginning of her back. The place seemed smaller than usual, and the heat began to become part of the environment they inhabited.

“What's up?” Thomas asks his girlfriend, who just watches him from the corner of her eye, giving a sideways smile in response. “And you?” The brunette stares at the actress who agrees with a somber look, stipulated to face the consequences that could come later.

Y/n touches the glowing screen in front of her, causing her eyes to shine with determination. The warm air of the actors' breathing hit the back of her neck, causing her hair to stand on end and her cheeks to turn redder than usual. Holland's jaw was clenched as he stared at Zendaya with worried eyes, even though she wasn't feeling pressured by the situation. It was all just a new way of getting into trouble while playing with each other. The countdown numbers began to appear on the screen, causing Y/n to turn away from the screen a little in an attempt to take one last look at the actress.

5

Y/n turns her body towards the actress

4

The brunette takes a step forward

3

Their eyes meet and their breaths merge

2

Their breasts touch

1

Their lips come together in a wet kiss, as the sound of the camera clicking is heard. Zendaya's tongue slides against Y/n's, letting out a brief moan as she feels her body being pressed against the wall of the small room.

Holland, for his part, gently touches his girlfriend's hip, who then leaves the older actress's kiss and attacks the lips of her boyfriend, who was watching the scene. The kiss quickly deepens, and he can even taste the drink that Zendaya was sipping before talking to both of them. The Brit takes one of his hands to the back of his girlfriend's neck, who grunts softly against the kiss.

Another click

Taking a deep breath after leaving the kiss, he pulls away from both of them, allowing an empty space to remain between the two actors. With a permissive look, Y/n's two hands find the backs of both of their hands in support of the intriguing atmosphere generated. Thomas nodded in agreement, taking a step forward and lowering his eyes to the dress that the brunette wore delicately with its fine linen features. The woman allowed herself to be touched, and finally both wet lips intertwined into one, tasting each other. Zendaya's hands playfully touch Holland's face, while the actor traces a line with his finger down the side of Coleman's waist

Another click

A strand of saliva is shared by both of them as they leave the kiss, and then, as a last shot, the three of them come together in a mixture of flavors and saliva while the photo was being uploaded. He was sloppy, inexperienced and completely dirty. Their lips made slippery sounds, and the sounds they shared were in tune. Their bodies were on fire, and although they hadn't talked about any kind of desire for threesomes, it was something that had certainly crossed their minds as they kissed in a naughty photo. The clicking sound was heard one last time, but the kiss hadn't stopped yet. It was only when the trio's hands began to descend to places beyond what was expected that Y/n leaned against the wall to catch his breath. His chest was heaving, and his lipstick, which had once been only on his mouth, was now down to his chin.

Thomas and Zendaya moved away from each other as soon as they missed Y/n, who stared at them laughing to herself.

“Holy shit” The woman fixed her hair, smiling at the couple in front of her.

“I didn't expect it to be… good.” The Briton said without thinking, causing a deafening silence that was broken by the women's laughter at the embarrassed look.

“Me neither,” Zendaya replied, smiling at the woman in black.

Finally, the sequence of four photos came out in black and white, eliciting a satisfied smile from Y/n. The woman nodded, showing the photo to the couple who also agreed with a drunken laugh.

1 day later

Breaking News! On Sunday morning (23), a photo was posted on Marvel actor @Tomholland2013's Instagram, which shows a sequence of four photos in which he, his girlfriend, Y/N L/N and actress Zendaya Coleman are seen kissing! Y/N L/N and Thomas Holland have been dating since 2019, but there were rumors that Zendaya was the main one in the relationship after fans started to ship the couple after the first “Spider-Man: Homecoming” movie. Sources close to the couple say that Thomas and Zendaya were uncomfortable with the rumors influencing their personal lives, and deny such an affectionate relationship off the set We had the pleasure of catching up with Y/N by phone, and the only thing she allowed us to put into this interview was:

“We're THE motherfucking trio”

[dashofmonsters]

Dreamers & Delusions- Pt. 1

Male Merman x Female Reader

You didn't like the idea of moving to another state and having to have a new life, but you hated the idea of staying even more so. There was nothing left for you but misery and you were just so tired of it.

When you moved to the west coast to live with your grandmother things seemed different. For the first few months there you felt like you could finally breathe, but that was short lived. Little by little things started to get worse.

First your grandmother kept making little snide remarks about your lack of interest in you not wearing make up. Then your job at the local diner had you working double shifts on the weekend. Your ex blasts some stupid shit about your break up all over social media and two of your close friends ghost you. Oh and then you discover a beautiful little slice of beach.

The last one wouldn't be so bad you tell yourself, if it wasn't for the same old stalking creeps who bother you at work. The only bright side was the mean mugging merman lifeguard who was built like a fucking god and had the attitude to back it up. In short, he's an asshole. But you know the difference between the good, the bad, and I'm just doing my job assholes and he's a weird mix of all three.

At first going to the beach was like free therapy for you. You could relax and get away from your judgmental grandmother and the creepy customers from the diner, it was like heaven. But just like moving here, things got worse over time. Somehow your three stalkers found your slice of heaven. Somehow you couldn't get far enough away from them. Somehow the beach became another slice of hell.

So you decided to sit as close as possible to the lifeguard when you wanted to lounge or swim out as far as possible. And that seemed to work, until today.

"Come on, I'm just asking you to have dinner with me," Kevin hovers over you, his arms crossed like an indignant child.

"For the last time man she's obviously not interested in an asshat like you. She'd rather go for drinks with me," Martin chimes in, his overly tattooed body stinking of cheap cologne and lack of deodorant.

"You two are fucked if you think she's going with either of you. She needs a real man, someone who can take care of her," Sam pushes the two aside and kneels down next two you. "Ain't that right sugar?" The accent, nickname, and bad breath nearly combined has you retching.

That response unfortunately spurred an impromptu fist fight. Kevin and Martin started wailing on Sam and then Sam the fuckboy threw punches filled with sand and Martin got punch so hard he moaned which made Sam hit him below the belt and the-

"I SAID ENOUGH!"

The scene died immediately. The nearly seven or eight foot tall merman lifeguard prowled towards the three idiots and parted them like they were curtains. Sam was the first to flee followed by Martin and Kevin who kicked up a ton of sand as the skedaddled towards the parking lot.

Mr. Asshole lifeguard stares you down hard now, his yellow eyes burning into you.

"Why is it whenever you're on my beach those three headaches are sure to follow?" he asks, very very pissed off.

You've had a similar question come up at work whenever those three would cause a ruckus on your shifts.

You roll your eyes, "Unfortunately some guys don't understand the definition of the word 'No'."

"So that means they have to follow you around like a group of parasites trying to latch at fresh meat?" he asks.

His question throws you off so much and the image it implies makes you giggle.

He's a merman from another realm who's acclimating, I should cut him some slack.

"That uh isn't too far from the truth but in all honesty, they're trying to bother me so much that I eventually have to say yes just to get them to stop bothering me," you explain.

The lifeguard crosses his arms and looks to the ground in serious contemplation before looking back up to you.

"And is this normal courting behavior," he asks.

"Unfortunately it is for some, but it's bad and wrong. For me it's annoying and I get no peace. They bothered me at work and now they bother me here when all I want to do is relax," you sigh, feeling oddly relieved to have gotten this off your chest albeit in an educational way.

"I see," he nods. "So you are not attracted to those parasites?"

"Not. At. All." you nod back.

"Noted," he grimaces and turns to walk back to the guard tower.

"Hey wait! What's your name?" you call out.

"It's Tao," he says, stilling walking towards his destination.

You smile and shout your name back to him but instead of dismissing you like you thought he would he waves back before ascending up the tower.

So it's Mr. Tao, mean mugging asshole lifeguard and crusher of parasites.

~~~~~~~~~

Things seemed calm for the first few days after Tao broke up the fight between the creeps. They didn't pop up at the diner nor at the beach but you still kept close to the guard tower. Well as close as Tao allowed it. He gave you a strong lecture that you needed to sit at least seven feet away from the tower for safety reasons.

Your grandmother even relaxed on her remarks for a little bit but moved from makeup to your weight. Something about working with food adding some extra pounds. It was a new hurt, but you'd numb to it eventually.

Getting numb was your specialty at this point.

And somehow finding new ways to bother Tao, though that was more unintentional. At first it was the sitting too close to the tower, then it was swimming without suntan lotion even though it was cloudy. Then it was not having an umbrella for shade which he oddly enough provided one for you a day later along with a lecture and a half. It would have been super annoying to anyone else but you found it oddly cute.

He'd henpeck at some of the parents over their kids running amuck or scold some of the too rowdy teenagers but no one could say that this guy didn't take his job seriously. No one got hurt or even so much as sunburnt under his watch.

Until they came back.

You had worked a long ass shift Sunday and all you wanted was to go to the beach and lounge. It was a short walk from your grandmother's house and you always enjoyed tuning the world out on that little trek.

It wasn't sunny but it wasn't too cloudy either. It was the perfect day to take a nice beach nap, watch a couple episodes of your favorite cooking shows, and maybe bother your favorite lifeguard for a bit of suntan lotion that you seem to keep forgetting.

You saunter down to the beach and lay out your favorite tie dye towel and stretch. Scanning the scene you notice that it'll be a very very calm day, that is since it's a Monday after all.

As you're about to walk over to the guard tower a familiar and annoying voice stops you.

"Hey babe, it's been a while!"

Ughhh Sam.

You ignore him and keep heading towards the tower. You hear him run towards you so you pick up the pace but are dragged back as he catches your arm.

"It's fucking rude to ignore someone talking to you," Sam spins you around and holds you in place.

"Like you'd fucking listen you fucking parasite. How many times do I have to say no or I'm not interested for you to get it through your thick fucking skull you goddamn idiot!" you yell at him, hoping Tao will hear.

Sam shakes you before jerking you around, "A pretty thing like you shouldn't be talking like that, come on and be sweet."

You start kicking your legs and land squirming violently before headbutting Sam as hard as you can right into his nose. He curses but doesn't let go so you decide to go to bite his hand until you're suddenly being ripped out of his arms.

Thinking it might be Tao you turn to smile only to be assaulted with that nasty cheap cologne smell. You grimace and try to pull away from Martin only to get yanked away by Kevin.

To his credit, Kevin doesn't hold on tight and he actually turns his back to the others before they try to continue their game of tug-a-war with you.

Sam kicks Kevin in the shin but somehow Kevin is able to stand long enough to push you in the direction of the tower. Without saying anything he turns and decks Sam in the face. You're frozen in horror for a moment then turn to run to the tower only to be met with a brick wall called Tao.

"I see the parasites are back on my beach," he seethes before looking you over. He looks furious.

Before you have a chance to say anything he stomps over and grabs Sam by his neck and hoists him in the air. Kevin and Martin fall back on their asses before scrambling to get out of the way.

"When someone says no, they mean no. It is not an invitation to continue your inappropriate courting behavior," Tao tightens his grip around Sam's neck.

"F-fffuck you fish boy. I will get you fucki-ing deported for this! I saw er first," Sam grits as he flails about, face turning all sorts of shades of red.

Tao tosses him to the ground like a ragdoll and before Sam can catch his breath, Tao holds him down by just a foot alone. He kneels down till his knee is almost digging into Sam's throat and says something that makes that asshat still.

You feel your heart still when Tao turns to you and beckons you over. Taking little steps at a time as your feet feel like lead you come to a stop next to Tao and Sam.

Sam is pale as a piece of printer paper.

"Tell her," Tao snaps at Sam.

"I-I-I am sorry. I won't bother you here or at the diner again. I promise you'll never see me again," Sam stutters and shakes like a leaf in a hurricane.

"And?" Tao presses.

"I-I'm a lowly parasite unworthy of your time and presence," he cries.

Tao nods then looks to you, "Anything you want to add?"

You're taken back by the soft look on his hard face. His eyes look worried even though his expression is still pissy offy.

You shake your head and cross your arms to hold yourself.

Tao moves off of Sam and forces him up and threatens to call the cops if he ever shows his ugly face on his beach again. Sam quickly scampers away, tripping several times as he makes his way to the parking lot.

There's a strange numbing feeling building in your chest that is suddenly washed away when Tao gently touches your shoulder.

"Come on, let me go look over those wounds," he nods towards the tower.

All you can do is follow him silently, still shocked about what just happened. You're so used to just going with the flow, dealing with whatever life gives you and fighting when you can. You've never had anyone come to your rescue. Not once.

"I have something that will clean the cuts where they got you with their fingernails and some band-aids. Unfortunately there will still be some bruising from when they were tugging at you," he says, a tinge of regret in his voice.

He leads you to the steps of the tower an has you sit down while he climbs up and grabs his first aid kit. You silently let him fuss over you as you try your best not to cry. Even though it's his job it's the first time anyone has treated you with this much kindness in a long while.

"Thank you," you mutter, finding it hard to speak.

Tao sighs and rubs some more antiseptic ointment on your arm, "I had thought my last conversation with those three would have been the last. Those males really are thick in the skull... I'm sorry."

"Don't be, you still came to my rescue," you try and smile but a stupid tear slips down.

Tao stills his hand, "Did that hurt?"

You shake your head, "No no, just uh got some sand in my eye. I'm fine."

He glares at you but sighs, "Alright then. Try and stay out of trouble and for the love of the goddesses please tell me if those parasites bother you again, in fact tell me if anyone bothers you while on my beach."

"Why?" you ask, feeling a bit strange that he'd go that far for your safety.

"Why?" he repeats, almost not sure of himself. "Because I like peace and you come here bringing chaos, more so than the kids whose parents are stuck to their devices or the teens who shoulder fight in the ocean."

"You mean chicken?" you ask, trying not to laugh.

"Whatever it's called! You humans have a major lack of self preservation and it's a wonder you've lasted this long," Tao stands, sounding frustrated as hell.

You dust yourself off and stand up too, "Well it's a good thing you're here then Mr. lifeguard... Because if it wasn't for you-"

You cut yourself off when the realization finally dawns on you. If it wasn't for Tao, things could have gotten a lot worse, you could have been hurt or dragged off the beach.

"If you weren't here, I might have been hurt a lot worse than just some bruises and cuts," you finish.

"If I got to you sooner you wouldn't be hurt at all," he replies, his face riddled with guilt.

"Yes well, what happened happened but you still saved me so stop blaming yourself for something that was out of your control dammit, " you kick some sand in his direction making him roll his eyes.

"You are too forgiving and far too kind for your own good," he shakes his head.

Too forgiving? No, he did nothing wrong. Too kind, maybe. You always hated confrontation when you could avoid it so you just smiled through things and mustered on. What was the point in getting upset when anger never solved anything.

"You might be right about the kindness thing, but forgiving," you pause to laugh. "I wouldn't say I'm forgiving at all, probably more spiteful if anything."

Yeah that felt right but not in the correct way. If you were going to prove a point it was usually in the worst way possible.

"Noted," Tao raises a jet black brow. He has such an interesting look with his tan skin and white hair with black streaks on one side. It was like if a Hollywood action star and a kpop idol had a baby or something. He has black bands on his arms that start right after his shoulders and stop right above the elbow. His hair is slicked back most of the time but right now it's messed up from his one sided fight with Sam.

"So uh, I'm just going to go back over there and do what I was going to do and relax," you give him your most nervous goofy grin.

Tao, in his ever so Taoness just nods.

~~~~~

True to his word you never saw Sam at the diner again or Martin, but Kevin did come by ever so often. Kevin was less on the creep side now, apparently very very sorry for his behavior and how he made you feel uncomfortable.

It didn't excuse what he did even though he tipped extra now to make up for it whenever he did come in.

Your grandmother though started to get worse again. From your make up, to your weight, and now your resistance to wearing booty shorts to catch a man's eye.

"I'm not going to wear it and that's final. I told you time and time again I'm not comfortable wearing shit like that," you raise your arms and try to stomp off.

"You ungrateful bitch are you afraid of looking like a slut? There are models and actresses who wear this! Are you slut shaming them," your grandmother shouts at you as she practically walks on your heals.

"God no! I just don't want to wear! Can we just drop it please," you beg her.

"I'll drop it once you try it on and walk outside in it for awhile," she tosses the shorts at you and crosses her arms.

"FUCK. NO." you crumple them up and toss them back at her feet.

"You're supposed to humor me remember? That was part of our deal for you to live here," she crinkles her face and slaps your arms.

You crumple back a bit and bite your cheek as you curse yourself for ever agreeing to live with her.

"Not at the expense of my comfort. I'm not your fucking dress up doll," you say through your teeth.

"You're insufferable, fine we'll make a trade deal. Don't humor me, but you owe rent now. two hundred a month. I believe that's more than fair," she throws up her hands and kicks the shorts to the side.

"Fine, that's fine. I can do that much," you exhale in relief. "I gotta get ready for work ok?"

"Yes yes and... I'm sorry, you know I get hot real easy. It's why I'm alone. I just don't want you to be. I just want you to be happy and well," she sighs and picks up the shorts.

"I know," you respond, the numbness starting to set in at her very stereotypical response.

"I love you," she coos as she forces you into a hug.

You give her a limp hug so she won't have something else to bitch about and tell her you love her too.

She's always like this after you two fight, so loving, so caring like she used to be when you were a little kid. She's changed to much after granpop cheated on her. No one saw it coming, they had such a great relationship but that was just what they showed everyone. In private, they both ran hot and your granpop was no saint. He cheated since the dawn of their marriage, he just didn't get caught until ten years ago.

Ever since that happened you tried to keep yourself better guarded so you wouldn't have to hurt like your grandmother. Unfortunately you're a hopeless romantic with a record of getting your heart broken very easily. That's part of the reason for the drastic move.

~~~~~

"Fuck I hate these dead shifts," you groan as you clean your section for the third time this evening.

"Enjoy it while it lasts sweetheart. Once summer hits, you'll be begging for a dead shift," Denise says as she lounges against the door to the kitchen.

"I know, I barely survived the ass end of it," you roll your eyes.

Working here was a breeze to be honest, but working under Mikey the shift manager was hell. He loves playing Russian Roulette with shifts, especially close to holidays or birthdays. Jessica bitched him out so bad in front of everyone that if he scheduled her on her birthday or her son's birthday one more time she would burn this place to the ground.

Needless to say when your ex-wife raises hell to a full diner, you listen.

You've stuck onto her like glue ever since, you needed an angel here.

"Any plans after you cut out," she asks.

Oh yeah, you have plans. Change and skip your happy ass down to visit your favorite lifeguard. You can't help but smile at the thought.

"Mmm you do have plans," she grins back and wriggles her drawn on brows.

"It's not like that," you roll your eyes.

Yes Tao is attractive but you hardly know him. He's nice and predictable. Safe and just wants things to be at peace. He's someone you respect for that for sure, but you can't see yourself crushing over him. It would ruin the faint friendship you've slowly but surely built with him.

"It really isn't it. He's like you. The only other friend I have here and I don't need more than that right now," you explain.

She gives you a sad smile and nods, "I know baby girl, you're still resetting from all that bullshit."

Jessica is the only one who really knows your situation as you spilled your heart out to her a couple weeks ago after she took you out for drinks for your birthday. She held you and patted your head as you ugly cried for a solid hour.

"How about you, anything new and exciting," you quickly change the topic and Jessica beams.

"Oh you know, just a little date with Mr. Perfect," she grins.

"This will be date number five Jes, you're really serious about him aren't you," you tease.

She crosses her arms and tosses her hip a bit and smiles, "Listen, if you asked me a few years ago if I ever saw myself dating a wild fae with a beard that would make every biker in the states jealous then I'd say you're crazy. But here I am, about to go on my fifth date with my wild man and I'm as happy as a bee in a bouquet."

She goes over her past dates with you until Mikey interrupts saying that you both need to get back to work. His interference was cut short by Jessica poking him in the chest and lecturing him about how there's no reason for the diner to be fully staffed during a dead shift and got the both of you off hours early.

"There will come a day when neither of us have to come back to this shithole ran by assholes. Just assume that if I never return that I got swept off my feet to the fae wilds to have crazy hot wild fae sex everyday," she laughs as she shimmies into her leather jacket and lights a smoke away from you.

"And if I never return, assume that I magically saved up enough to start my own restaurant," you smile back.

That's been the big dream. A small tapas style restaurant that catered to humans and the fair folk. There are so few establishments opened that cater to their palettes and it's not fair. Food brings people together and you see it as a great way to mix the fair folk into your world. Problem is, you don't know a lot of fair folk aside from Tao.

Suddenly the lightbulb in your head goes off.

"That's it," you say under your breath before hugging Jessica goodbye and running towards the beach.

I can ask him what he likes to eat and start from there. This is doable! I just hope he doesn't mind playing a million questions.

~~~~~~~~~

"Hey Tao, are you up there?" you shout as you round the tower.

Without so much as a word Tao drops with a sandy thud.

"What did you forget now? It's too dark for sunscreen and too warm for a shawl. Water perhaps?" he guesses and turns to climb back up the tower but you quickly stop him.

"No no, none of that. I uh um... What do merfolk like to eat?" you ask.

"Why do you want to know? Is a male courting you or something?" he asks back.

"What? No no. It's just that one day I want to run a restaurant that serves food for the fair folk and you're the only one I know so...," you shrug to him and he blushes.

This big ass god like brick wall just blushed?

"Ah, I see," he clears his throat. "Well in that case I can create a detailed list of ingredients and dishes that suit a saltwater diet."

"That... That would actually be amazingly helpful. Wow... Thank you!" you grin but then remember that thing about courting.

"So what was that thing you meant when you asked if I was being courted?" you raise a brow.

Tao's eyes go wide and he has this nervous look on his face that you've never seen before. "It's uh, customary for the males of my kind to present a feast to a female they are courting. Usually a female has many suiters and picks whoever has the most impressive spread the privilege to continue courting her."

"Oh, that's interesting. I haven't heard much on mer culture and traditions so this is new to me. I'm sorry if the question made you uncomfortable," you apologize.

"No, no. It's just that no one has asked or even seemed a bit interested in my people's ways. They're just interested in me," Tao waves up and down to himself.

"Well if they were truly interested in you, they'd try to get to know you," you cross your arms, upset for him.

Tao nods and you can tell he's thinking really really hard about something until he shakes his head.

"How can you tell if someone is wanting to get to know you for reasons other than trying to get me to their... uh what is the human word for nest again," he snaps his fingers trying to think.

"Bed?" you ask.

"That's it, how would I know," he repeats.

"Hmm, that can be a tough one. Some people will really put in a lot of effort to make you think that they care when they just one a night of fun. Some will check in on you everyday till they finally get you into their bed and ditch you when they're done," you explain.

Tao looks disgusted, "And this too is normal behavior?"

"For the people who just want a good time and don't give a rats ass about someone's feeling, yes," you grimace.

"Is this from your personal experience or observation," he asks.

Tao's famous curveball question hits you right in the gut. You look away from him and hold yourself for a moment as the numbness builds.

"Yes," is all you manage to say.

"I am sorry. It seems my question was insensitive," he bows.

"It's fine, you're just curious. I'd rather help you not make the same mistakes that I had to. You're like the only other friend I have here," you admit.

Tao looks shocked when you say that, like you slapped him with a wet towel.

"You consider me a friend?" he finally asks after a long moment of silence.

Shifting a bit in the sand you bite your cheek and nod, "You're the only guy friend I have. I feel safe when I'm at the beach and you don't make me feel uncomfortable at all. I just... some things are hard for me to talk about ok?"

He nods and although his expression doesn't change much, there's a brightness in his eyes you've never seen.

"Is that ok? I mean if it's against your culture I understand it can be o-"

"No, it's alright. I just didn't think a human would want to be friends with me," he run his hand through his hair and stares at the ground.

"Well, I mean you do mean mug just about everyone you talk to but I know deep down you're probably just being on your guard and it's hard to be nice sometimes," you tell him.

"I see, so not being expressive keeps people away? Hmm what could remedy this without me having to give up my uh... mean mug," Tao cocks his head and crosses his arms.

"I'm not sure. Most people tend to like it when you're more welcoming and less upset looking all the time. Is your stoicism like some cultural thing?" you ask in turn. Turns out Tao is playing a million questions with you now.

"Yes. Typically we're only expressive with close friends, family, and our mates. They're the only ones who are supposed to see your true face," he replies.

"That actually sound reasonable and nice," you smile.

"Do humans not have something like that," he settles against the tower later, full into the conversation now.

"Yes and no. Some of us rely more on friends than family and vice versa. Some will rely on their mates alone if their family or friends aren't available. It can be all sorts of combinations really," you shrugs and lean against one of the pillars holding up the tower.

Tao looks up thoughtfully before his gaze settles out towards the ocean. There's a comfortable quiet between the two of you as the sun sets behind a cluster of grey clouds.

"Looks like rain," you comment.

"It's been smelling like a set of storms all week. Probably about to usher in some cold weather," Tao sniffs the air and sighs.

"Not a fan of the cold?" you shift in the sand and turn a little more towards Tao.

He shakes his head, "I grew up in a much warmer climate. If it ever got too cold we would sleep in our clusters or migrate. I can't do either here so I've just been adding more layers to my nest with every paycheck I get and buying the warmest clothes that fit me."

"I gotchya. I like some good mild weather myself. Not too hot or cold. By the way what will you do once winter hits? Beaches are usually closed once winter hits," you ask, realizing you might have to find another safe haven of sanity during that time.

"I'm not too sure, I haven't given it much thought," he admits. "At least I have a little time to consider a winter job so I don't have to hibernate."

"Yeah that would be... wait what?"

Part. 2>

[queen-of-deans-booty]

Red Meat: Part One

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Female!Reader

Word Count: ~2k

Warnings: canon angst and violence, extra angst, getting shot, nearly dying

Summary: What you think is a routine werewolf case is actually your nightmare. Amara is finally ready to have her vessel, whether you like it or not. There's not much choice when she threatens the ones you love.

Season Eleven Masterlist

Author’s Note: I do not own anything from Supernatural. All credit goes to their respective owners. I love seeing any and all comments <3

x

Today is going to be a good day. You've declared it. You rest your feet on the library table with a plastic ball in hand. Colonel is lying by your chair watching his younger brother bark and jump around. You throw the plastic ball across the room and use your magic to let it go into the war room. Zeus barks and runs after the ball just as Dean walks in.

"Whoa, where's the fire?"

"It's in ball form and Zeus is loving it."

Zeus comes running back into the library and drops the slobber ball into your hand. You toss it back into the war room and wipe your hand on your jeans.

"How are you doing? Feeling better about... everything?"

"There are good days and bad days. This is a good one."

Dean smiles. "Good."

Sam walks into the library with an iPad in his hands. "I think I found something."

"What, on Amara, Lucifer, or a Hand of God?"

"Neither. It's a case. Werewolves. There's a pattern of missing campers. Five in the last three months."

"So, they got lost?" Dean asks, frustrated.

"That's what the rangers thought, too, until a couple of days ago when they found a body missing a heart. They're saying it's an animal attack but you know how that goes."

"Alright, we'll make a call for someone else to handle it."

This isn't about getting someone to do the job. It's about Castiel. Dean misses him, and you know Sam does, too. You do.

"Baby, we'll get him back," you sigh.

"How?"

"I don't know, but we'll figure it out. I mean, you got me back and we got Sam back when he didn't have a soul. We got Castiel back after the Leviathans got to him. We'll figure it out."

"She's right. We need to get out and clear our heads. We've been stuck in here for two weeks. This is a case. Let's do what we do. Let's work it."

"Fine," Dean sighs.

The five campers went missing the the same area in a densely wooded park near a very, very small town. There are only three heavily populated areas in this part of town, and you've already hit two of them. The last place is the only bar in town, and that's where you, Sam, and Dean are. Dean stops to grab something to eat while you and Sam chat with the bartender.

"You know, I used to be good with faces, but it's my age and the number of folks that come through this place that ruined that for me. I seem to have lost the knack so these days, everybody under forty looks the same to me. I'm sorry."

She leaves the counter and you sigh in frustration. Just like the other two places. No one seems to want to help in this goddamn town.

"Great," Dean scoffs.

"Alright, we know we're in the right place. We've tried the police station, the fleabag motel we're staying in, and this bar."

"That's it. We've officially run out of things to interrogate. Unless you want to go outside and start talking to the trees.

"Okay. Let's call it a night."

"Can we get the check, please?" Dean asks the bartender who comes back.

"We can go to Park Services in the morning and talk to the rangers," Sam suggests.

"You folks should check out one of the Easement Cabins. It's private property within the park. It's just held onto for tax purposes, so campers stumble on them and can hole up in there for weeks. Some of your missing could be in one of them."

"Do you mind showing us where they are?" Sam asks and provides a map to her.

"Sure." She points to an area deep in the park. "Right about there."

"That is a big help. That's great. Thank you."

"No problem."

Dean slaps down some money for the bill, and the three of you leave the bar. Wanting to get this over with sooner rather than later, Sam opts to look through the pitch-black darkness in the woods for the cabins instead of waiting until sunrise. To be honest, you'd rather do it this way, too. You want to get home. Dean parks right where the cell phone reception starts to be fuzzy so you know you're in the right place. Werewolves can kill their victims without having to worry about them calling anyone for help.

"I think if we head that way," Sam points away from the car, "we should be about a four-mile trek to the cabin." You and Dean don't say anything. "You know, we always talk about taking a break and going camping. This could be like camping. It could be fun."

"Which part? Freezing our asses of in the middle of the woods on a thin lead?" Dean asks.

"Yeah, that part. Oh, come on."

"Okay," Dean sighs.

You have no choice but to leave the car behind because there aren't any trails that the car would fit on. You create a ball of magic and allow it to light your way so you don't have to hold a flashlight. It's thirty minutes later of crunching leaves and stepping on twigs that you start to break off from Sam and Dean. You'll be able to locate them by their flashlights so you're not worried about losing them. Dean watches you break away but doesn't say anything knowing you can take care of yourself out here.

You think you see what looks like a cabin. Turns out, it's a large tent someone left behind. You must be getting close if there is an abandoned tent all the way out here. It must belong to one of the missing campers.

"Y/N? Where are you?" Dean calls out from a hundred yards away.

"Right here. Be right there."

You turn to head back when you notice someone standing in your path. Before you convince yourself it's the werewolves, you shine your flashlight on the person's face.

Amara.

"It's time," she grins.

You look around for Sam and Dean but their flashlights are even further away now. They won't be able to get to you in time.

"For what?"

"I need my vessel. You're doing so well with magic."

Anger blooms in your chest, and you suddenly become pissed at her.

"Like hell, I'm going to give up my body for you. You killed my son." Your voice cracks. "I am never giving you what you want."

"I did apologize for that, you know. This isn't up for negotiation."

"The answer is no. Now go away."

You push past her but she doesn't let you get too far.

"Fine. I'll just take Joanna, then. She's another vessel, you know." You stop in your tracks, your eyes as wide as saucers. You slowly turn to Amara who looks at the sky in thought. "I'll just take her and make her do unspeakable acts, force her to grow up, and use her until she begs me to let her go." She laughs. "Actually, that sounds more fun. I'll just do that instead."

She turns to leave, but you're quick to stop her. "Wait!"

Amara smirks and turns around. "Yes?"

"I'll do it," you say without hesitation." She begins to walk toward you. "On two conditions."

"What are they?" she asks with a sigh.

"You leave my children alone. No harm will come to them at all. You leave them out of this."

"And the second?"

Tears come and you don't stop them from falling. "You let me say goodbye to them."

"Fine."

"Really?"

"Despite what you may think, I am not a monster. You have until sundown tomorrow night. Twenty-four hours. Not a minute longer."

Suddenly, she disappears. The rest of the tears fall down unwillingly. So much for your good day. You turn and sprint back to Sam and Dean who are looking around for you with their flashlights.

"Whoa, hey, what happened? Are you okay?" Dean asks when he sees your tears.

"No. It's Amara."

"What?"

"I just saw her. She... She wants me. She wants her vessel. She's giving me until sundown tomorrow night before she'll take me."

"Like hell! She's getting shit!" Dean roars angrily.

"Dean, we knew this was coming," you cry.

"No, she can't take you away! Tell her, Sam!"

"She threatened Joanna," you say before Sam can say anything. "She'll take her instead. What kind of mother would I be if I let that happen? Maybe I'll be strong enough to beat her. I can lock her inside my head."

"You want to know what I think?" Sam asks. "I think we came out here to do a job. Y/N, you know I have your back but these missing campers don't. More people can go missing if we don't kill these werewolves. You said she gave you until sundown tomorrow night. Let's finish the job tonight and if we can't, we'll call another hunter and go home before sundown."

"Yeah, you're right," you sniffle.

It might seem dickish and not fair, but Sam is right. You have more time than these missing campers. The cabins aren't far from where you're standing, and luck would have it that the werewolves are inside with two of the five missing campers. They must have seen your flashlights or heard you because they started a fight as soon as you walked through the doors. The two missing campers are strung up by their wrists, both of them knocked out.

The male werewolf grabs Sam and bodyslams him into a wooden table, breaking it into pieces. He takes out his gun to shoot him, but the werewolf kicks it out of his hand. He tries to stomp on Sam's face, but the younger Winchester grabs the boot and tries his best to hold him at bay. The female werewolf runs at Dean and slams him into a glass cabinet. You conjure a silver knife out of magic and fling it at the female werewolf, watching as it plunges into her upper arm.

She backs away from Dean with a painful howl, and your husband takes this opportunity to punch her to the ground. You blast the male werewolf in the gut to get him off of Sam, and he goes flying across the room and into a wooden post that supports the house. The male werewolf bounces back easily and runs at you full speed. You don't have enough time before he is barreling into you, slamming you against the window.

The glass shatters behind you, and you grab one of the bigger pieces and shove it into the werewolf's neck. He staggers back and you conjure another silver knife before stabbing it into his chest. He falls to the ground, and you look over at Dean to see how he's doing with his werewolf.

Instead, you're staring down the barrel of a gun. The gun that the male werewolf kicked out of Sam's hand. The gun that the female werewolf is holding. She pulls the trigger, and you gasp when pain erupts in your left side. You look down to see blood gushing out of the wound. If you had to guess, you were shot in your stomach. You fall to the ground just as Dean kills the female werewolf.

Dean rushes over to you while Sam rushes to help the campers who are strung up by their wrists.

"Can't you heal yourself?" Dean panics.

"I can't heal until the bullet is out," you gasp in pain.

"Okay, you're going to be okay. I'll get the bullet out. Stay with me."

Dean gets up and runs around the room, looking for a first aid kit. You look at the couple and see the man already away.

"Baby, you still with me?" the man asks, but the woman isn't responding.

Dean comes back with a first aid kit and looks through it for something that will help dig a bullet out. You can already feel your stomach acid leaking through and attacking your other organs.

"Okay, I'm going to get that bullet out of there, but it's going to hurt like hell."

"I've been through worse," you cry.

"Hang on, sweetheart. I got this."

He grabs some tweezers and uses his lighter to sanitize the end of it, the part that's going inside your body. He hates to do this but he sticks the tweezers into your wound, and you tip your head back and scream as loud as you can. Dean closes his eyes and tries to block out your cries of pain as he searches for the bullet.

"Come on, come on! I almost got it." Dean feels the bullet. "Okay, there we go. I got it." Dean pulls the bullet out of your body and holds it up. "Look at that, huh? Are you still with me?"

"Yeah, I'm good," you cry.

x

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[scoobydoodean]

sorry, i'm genuinely confused by your s6 deancas conflict take. i don't think either is the bad guy but i think cas was doing what he could with what he had. i don't think he was in the wrong but i'm curious to know what you think he could've done to be in the right? be honest and upfront? that would jeopardize his mission and put him on the outs with dean. sure, that happened anyway but he did stop raphael

i've also always been confused by dean's "i was here where were you?" because was he though? when they did find out, they punished him and cut him off instead of idk, strategizing with cas. it was a lose/lose situation for cas from the get-go starting with his decision not to involve dean as much as he could help it because cas did care about him. if the issue was working with crowley, cas ended up double-crossing him anyway. if the issue was being dishonest, well, that's nothing new among the winchesters

anyway, i don't have a favorite between deancas because i could never pick but in s6 i very much sympathized with cas so again, i guess i'm curious what you think he could've done differently. i hope this ask doesn't annoy you too much

Let's separate this into two pieces. 1) What I actually said (i.e. the disk horse I was addressing) 2) The utility of Cas's plan to pop Purgatory.

First, what did I say today based partly on a post I made yesterday?

It’s not remotely hard to see that Cas repeatedly uses Dean without his knowledge throughout the season. But you’d think based on how 90% of destiel shippers talk that Cas was waiting on Dean hand and foot while having his own needs ignored by a callous asshole. That’s literally the story people try to tell you while Cas uses Dean for everything from spells to forced labor to a meat shield for Raphael and Virgil while only showing up when Sam and Dean having a lead on an angel weapon is mentioned. They just erase Cas’s problems in order to misrepresent and reduce Dean down to a mean friend who doesn’t deserve him.

I'm wasn't talking about the plan to pop Purgatory and the conflict that happens over it in 6.20 (we can address that in a moment). I'm talking about how a large chunk of destiel fandom erroneously argues that season 6 Dean is a bad friend throughout the entire season who only cared about Cas being useful to him, when Cas is the one who spends the entire season using Dean without his knowledge. You want to have a conversation about something slightly different, which is fine, but don't conflate two common streams of disk horse about separate things. They have some overlap yes—but don't get it twisted.

What could Cas have done differently?

Cas could have asked to use Dean's blood for a spell instead of yanking his wrist over and cutting his palm open for blood without a word, but instead, he did it without asking (and that small act sets the stage for how Cas treats Dean the entire season). Cas could have asked if Sam and Dean would look for leads for him on angelic weapons. He could have asked them if they would look for leads on Purgatory instead of secretly cosigning Crowley coercing them into forced labor capturing alphas. He could have asked them if they would keep Raphael and Virgil off his tail long enough for him and Balthazar to collect their weapons. Instead, Cas used them without their permission or knowledge. All Dean asks in these moments is to be told that Cas needs his help instead of being used without permission.

You seem certain that giving Sam and Dean any information would have "jeopardized his mission"... but how? Setting aside the actual utility of Cas's plan to pop Purgatory for now, Cas actually could have communicated what he needed in every single one of these situations without revealing his plan to pop Purgatory. In fact, that's exactly what he did with Balthazar, isn't it? But again—we're talking about two slightly different things here. EYE was talking about whether or not it's true that Dean was a mean and bad friend who didn't care that Cas needed help and never offered him assistance while Cas moped like a wet cat, back aching from bending over backwards to help Dean with *looks at notes* something. EYE pointed out that Cas absolutely did not fail to make Dean useful to him. He just didn't bother to tell Dean he was doing it. YOU are talking about whether or not the Cas's plan to pop Purgatory was the only viable solution to the Raphael problem and whether Dean should have supported Cas despite everything when the plot was revealed in 6.20. Again—this is a separate (though somewhat interrelated) discourse.

Despite all the crying about Bad Friend Dean, it was Cas who showed through his behavior throughout the season that he would rather treat Dean as a pawn than as a friend. Cas coerces and lies instead of just asking his friend for help. Forgive me if I'm not going to coddle him over it. If you've been in this fandom for a single moment, you know that the fanon fantasy of Dean being a horrible bad mean friend with a angelic guardian waiting on him hand and foot starts long before 6.20 when Dean rejects the finally revealed plan to pop Purgatory, and the whitewashing of Cas's actions and outright denial of Cas using Sam and Dean also starts long before then. So lets not move goal posts. I'm asking people to stop ignoring and misrepresenting every single thing that happened between Dean and Cas leading up to 6.20. I'm asking people to stop assigning all of those things only selective importance (i.e., they're only important when Dean was the "bad friend", but when Cas was, it didn't matter/didn't happen).

Now let's talk about "the plan to pop Purgatory" briefly and the utility of that plan and whether Dean not jumping to help Cas swallow every soul in Purgatory makes him a bad and mean and terrible friend. Multiple people in Cas's life tried to tell him his plans would backfire, and he didn't listen. He ended up starting an apocalypse which was the very thing he was trying to prevent. He just traded out Raphael for the Leviathan and made no meaningful progress toward an actual improvement in terms of "threats to the world as we know it". How exactly did he make anyone better off?

For some reason, some people insist on arguing that while it did backfire spectacularly, it was "the only option" to dispense with Raphael and "there was no other choice", but nobody saying that actually knows that. In fact from a meta/lore perspective, this is just... outright wrong. Archangels have been dealt with in any number of other ways over the course of the show. The Cage. A weird ass egg. The archangel sword. Spellwork. You can invent whatever goddamn lore you want. You cannot reasonably argue it was "the only option" when archangels repeatedly show up and are dispensed with in a variety of ways that aren't "swallowing all the souls in purgatory, going insane, declaring yourself god, and starting a new apocalypse so we're right back where we started".

The only reason "popping Purgatory" is the only plan we get in season 6 is that it's the only plan that Cas allows to be made. He refuses to so much as consider the possibility of anything else because he's so deeply caught in sunk cost fallacy. When Sam and Dean and Bobby finally learn what he's up to and disagree with his plan, Cas breaks Sam' brain to keep them out of his way. When Balthazar disagrees with his plan, Cas murders him.

i've also always been confused by dean's "i was here where were you?" because was he though? when they did find out, they punished him and cut him off instead of idk, strategizing with cas.

...No? It was the other way around.

6.20

Dean tried to get info on what was going on with Cas from 6.03 when he learned about the angelic war onward, and Cas would give vague answers then fly off. In 6.10, Dean asked if there was anything he and Sam could do and Cas said there wasn't. When he found out about Cas working with Crowley, Dean asked to brainstorm a new solution and work as a team and Cas refused to consider this for a single moment. He insisted nothing about his plan was broken despite multiple people warning him, and his own secret-keeping suggested his own conflicted feelings.

[starwrighter]

I am not a baby!! (yes you are)

(Ao3) (Masterpost) (previous) (next)

(Chapter ten baby!!!!)

Danny isn't stupid. He knew Giga Fish was still here somewhere. Watching him... Hairs on the back of his neck stood on end, oxygen ticking lower and lower as he darted back into the semi-safety of his base.

A backpack full of peepers and bladderfish smelled awful. Getting the fishy smell out of his suit was going to take ages! Bladder fish are natural water filters. The fabricator draws out drinkable water from the fish's well...Bladder. Ancients, he hoped the fabricator sterilized this with its little lasers.

Non vegan water...

Sam would have a conniption fit, Tucker would love everything about it. He'd find a way to contact them soon if they didn't find him first. The earful he would get from Jazz might just be worse than his giant stalker. Getting lectured by Jazz would be preferred over sitting here with a gigantic fish a few dozen meters away. At least with Jazz, he knew she cared about him. He didn't know what the big guy wanted from him. Danny wasn't exactly a snack you'd travel through the sea for.

Whatever the guy wanted, Danny didn't care. As long as they both stuck to themselves, things would go just fine...

Peeking through the curtain, Danny saw the massive eel-like fish curled up, staring directly at his base.

Danny really wanted to study the guy. What were his eating habits? He didn't seem to be interested in eating any of the fish around him. Both the sharp teeth at the front of his maw and the shiny bioluminescent stripes that drew fish closer to him suggested a carnivore, but his complete disinterest conflicted with this.

Could a fish be vegetarian? A fish capable of sentience like this one probably could, but Danny didn't want to shove his head in the lion's mouth to test that.

Drawing on his PDA, Danny sketched out the blueprints for a table with a trash bin that slotted into the left side. Two air-tight cabinets were built into it. One smaller one underneath the trash bin and one larger, like a fridge on the right. In the middle was a collapsible set of stairs that'd allow him to reach the top of the table. Maybe making the table shorter would be more convenient, but giving up that extra storage space along with his dignity would be too much for him right now. The table top was a bit too empty for his liking, so he added small drawers at the back edge of the table. A perfect place to store small blades and silverware when he created the blueprints for them. Overall, it was much more like a workstation with built-in storage than a table, but Danny still planned to eat his meals here just as he planned to prepare them.

The fabricator would've been sufficient to cook his meals, but the lasers vaporized the shit out of the organs and bones of the fish. Anything nonedible in a fish's body turned to dust. The dusted ligaments and organs gave the meat a medical taste, like using hydrogen peroxide as mouthwash. Sure, the lasers were cool, but what was the point of cooking if your food tasted like high-tech sadness? It was bad enough that the only seasoning he had was salt. He didn't need his food to taste like it was made in a lab. Gutting his own fish was a necessity. Anything he couldn't eat could be tossed outside for the carnivores to snack on. They deserved a little treat for dealing with his stupidity.

Danny built his little table close to his fabrication station, ensuring it was anchored to the floor and wall. An unsteady piece of furniture could flatten him into an ugly pancake. If his friends were here, they'd agree he looked much cuter when he's only fifty percent dead.

Quickly stepping up to the table with his backpack full of fish, he unsheathed his survival knife... The knife would've been so much more effective than his teeth when he fought the big guy. Danny fought the urge to facepalm. What's done is done, he bit someone like a feral raccoon, but everything worked out!

Gutting fish was more difficult than he'd expected it to be. It was hard to tell if his lack of experience or now tiny hands were what made the task feel a thousand times harder. Peeper blood was yellow, but his own was still a vibrant red that dripped onto the table with every slip of the hand. It felt like a fishing trip with Dad, only without the forty-minute lecture on the dangers of ghost fish.

Running his hands over the now gutted Peepers, Danny used all the power he could muster, freezing them solid. Spots danced in his peripherals, the floor spinning underneath him like a carousel. It took a minute or two to regain his composure. Sitting on the ground with his frozen fish head pounding, face flushed red. Forcing his powers was like trying to drink scalding hot coffee through a toothpick-thin straw. It left him out of breath, fingertips burning with no evidence of damage.

There was an ecto dampener on this planet, he was certain of that. One stronger than any of the ones his parents had built. A radius that reached far past the planet's atmosphere yet still remained potent enough to prevent any significant power usage.

Unfortunately for whoever put the field up, it didn't cancel out his powers completely. Maybe if it did, he would have died completely, saving the culprit or culprits from being mauled. If Danny was anything, he was a stubborn bastard, and there was no amount of dampening that would stop him from clawing the faces of whatever had the audacity to do this! If he had access to his powers he could've saved everyone!

Over a hundred people died because he wasn't strong enough to save them! Because he was prevented from saving them. Ships like the Aurora don't just crash and burn for no reason. Alterra might skimp out a bit on employee safety, but the engineers they hired for serious maintenance were top-of-the-line. Underpaid, but top of the line, they wouldn't make a mistake that could cause that much damage. The way the ship shook, it felt like something had hit them. Everything about this seemed more and more suspicious the more thought he put into it.

For now all he could do was survive in hopes of finding some kind of lead. Finding and stopping whatever was stifling his powers was number three on his to-do list. Just above studying the wildlife but below finding other survivors and surviving himself.

First things first was rations! Both he and any other survivor would need food and water. While he was set with his... questionably hygienic water, fabricating more was a necessity. Giga fish was still out there, Danny could feel eyes on him whenever he passed the glass. All it would take was a split decision to plop his tail in front of the hatch, and Danny was trapped in here to either starve or dry out like a sponge under a sunlamp.

Coral samples and crumbling chunks of salt were taken by the fabricator, turned into bleach within the blink of an eye. The PDA screamed at him, a pitch that could've made his ears bleed. Warnings flashed on screen, the AI desperately pleading with him not to put the substance anywhere near his face. A wild contradiction to the PDA entrance that recommended using it to disinfect his wounds.

Only when he used the bleach to fabricate more water did the tablet stop screaming. The water smelt chemical, and it tasted vaguely of metal coins. Like the overpriced bottled waters, you'd find at an airport vending machine. Laying the bottles on their sides, he stashed them away in the cabinet, placing frozen peepers between each layer. Cold water wasn't a luxury he'd be willing to give up, nor was it something he'd give himself a mind-splitting headache over. So the obvious solution was to turn the cabinet into a disturbing refrigerator with dead fish eyes that stared into the deepest depths of his soul!

Nobody ever said survival was aesthetically pleasing.

Walking back to the window, Danny stares flatly at the curtain. Apparently, the whole "You can't see me, therefore I no longer exist," rule didn't work on this guy, so the curtain was completely useless. Peeking past the cloth, he could see the fish staring at him. Didn't even bother to hide, just sat there like he didn't belong hundreds of meters down doing anything else.

If watching him gave this guy joy, he's going to do something nobody could be entertained by. No longer should he be the comedian for giga fish! He was going to do something so drastic, something he'd only done sparely over the past year! He was going to...

Sleep!

He collapsed down onto the floor, curling himself up with the low-hanging curtains. Spite made it all the easier for him to fall asleep.

@ashoutinthedarkness @avelnfear @meira-3919 @thought-u-said-dragon-queen @hugsandchaos @blep-23 @zeldomnyo @bytheoldwillowtree @justwannabecat @shepherdsheart @starlightcat04 @stargazing-bookwyrm @pupstim @dragongoblet

[goodluckclove]

Movie Night With Your Eccentric Older Brother Simulator (Free Weird Movies Recs)

So I've always had a vague awareness of the archetype surrounding an Alt Older Brother who introduces you to weird media. I have no real-life frame of reference for this person. While I was close to my actual older brother for a long time, I don't think he introduced me to much.

But after finding that list of free movies and realizing the link to Evil Dead II was a podcast video about the movie as opposed to the actual movie, I decided to put together my own list of cult/weird movies. Nothing too intense. It's got some horror, but it's not all horror. Consider this a way to LARP a kind of skeevy older brother with a strange inner world who you idolize despite him clearly not doing super great right now. He loves you in a weird, scruffy way that he doesn't like to talk about in precise language.

(EDIT: Also I did go out of my way to pick kind of shitty VHS rips for some of these. I do consider them the ideal way to view them. For immersion's sake.)

Uh, hey man. So Mom and Dad left for some fuckin' - I don't know, I still had half my headphones on so I wasn't really paying attention. But they're gone for the night and I guess I'm in charge or whatever. They said I could use their card to order pizza which is pretty sick. I'll order one for each of us, and then I'll just hole up in the basement to listen to The Flower Kings and -

What? You wanna hang out?

No, that's - yeah, I guess I did make a face. My bad. Um, sure I can hang. I know you've been kind of bummed lately. I guess we could watch a movie if you want. No, dude, step the fuck away from the DVD shelf. If I have to watch Click one more goddamned time I'm gonna' blow my brains out.

I'm kidding. That was a joke. Don't tell Mom I said that. Also, scroll through this. These are all the deep cuts my friends at community college have been collecting while we stay out late and smoke - meats. Yeah - my bros Skeet and Blazer? They're big...big barbecue fans. Yeah.

Stop looking at me, dude, just pick a movie.

Pink Floyd's The Wall (1982)

Oh fuck yeah. Uh, no it's not the album. I mean, it's technically the album - but remember how I told you that The Wall is a Rock Opera? This is the visual adaptation of that Rock Opera. It's got the whole album - complete with a short song from The Final Cut which is another Pink Floyd that came out after The Wall but has a lot of the same themes. This thing has some fuckin' killer animations by Gerald Scarfe. It's a pretty intense take on modern masculinity and fame in post-war Britain from someone with direct experience in all of that.

Evil Dead II (1987) and Armies of Darkness (1992)

What? It's Sam Rami, dude, of course there's gore. It's a Sam Rami movie that isn't Spiderman, so there's a ton of gore and jump scares. No but like - they aren't good jump scares and the gore is absolutely nonsense. It's a horror comedy but it's pretty heavy on the comedy, you know? In Evil Dead II (No, you don't need to start with the first one. The first act of Evil Dead II is a remake of The Evil Dead.) the main guy Ash has his hand turn evil, so he cuts it off and replaces it with a chainsaw.

Shut the fuck up, man, it's not spoilers. It's barely top five in crazy shit that happens in this movie. It's awesome though Bruce Campbell is like horror Mister Bean. He's also hot as fuck. Nevermind. Forget I said that.

Hellraiser (1987)

Seriously, if you pick this you can't tell Mom and Dad I let you watch it. Well, I don't think it's scary, but the practical effects are pretty hardcore for its time and I remember you were pretty upset when you came in and hid in my room while Skeet and I were watching The Thing.

It's pretty gory. It's a body horror film. But aside from some retro-horror staples it's definitely not - like - realistic gore. It's like a guy will die because he gets exploded by chains from goth BDSM demons. Then he's resurrected but he's got no skin and he's kind of bitchy about it for a while. It's pretty cool. Pretty - um - it's got pronouns, you know? It's - I can't call it gay, right? No, it's literally gay. Clive Barker is a gay man. This is a pretty queer horror series.

Shock Treatment (1981)

So Jim Sherman and Richard O'Brien made Rocky Horror Picture Show. They then made an AU of their own movie musical - which is this movie, Shock Treatment. Call me a contrarian, but I like this one a bit better. RHPS is great, but it's so overwhelmingly Tim Curry that it does drown out everything else. This seems like a bit more of an ensemble cast where you can really enjoy the whole movie. Plus their song "Bitchin' in the Kitchen" is like one of my favorite musical songs.

Paprika (2006)

Satoshi Kon is easily one of the best animators of all time. He's the same guy that did Perfect Blue, but that's a little bit more of an intense watch (Although is you do decide to do it do not watch the dubbed version. I'm not being a 'subs not dubs' weeb again the ending was so subtle that the dub fucked it up). Paprika is fantastic It's a beautifully animated science-fiction adventure akin to Inception if Inception was led by a cool lady. It's gorgeous.

Synechdoche, New York (2008)

Charlie Kaufman is one of those directors who people think encourage Angsty Indie White Guys, even though all of his movies specifically focus on how pathetic Angsty Indie White Guys are. This is a big one, but it's beautiful and I've seen it five times. Every time it leaves me quiet and thoughtful. If we watch this and I cry you aren't allowed to say shit about it.

Sorry to Bother You (2018)

This is a surrealist, sci-fi black comedy by writer/director, rapper, and communist activist Boots Riley. it's pretty crazy right off the get go. It's cool to see a blatantly anti-capitalist speculative fiction story that isn't - like - blatantly ideological. It definitely has the ideology, but not at the sacrifice of great writing and directing and a really fun story.

How's that film major I'm dating? Kai is fine. Kai's cool. Kai's...enough about Kai.

Brazil (1985)

This is like 1984 but in the hands of the most creative Monty Python guys. It is crazy how creative this movie is. Like early Tim Burton. Just chaotic and hilarious and horrifying. It's awesome.

But I'm getting sick of talking. Would you pick something already?

You picked: Dancer in the Dark (2000)

The...the fucking Lars Von Trier musical starring Bjork? The that starts with Bjork playing a poor immigrant mother who's slowly going blind and struggling to make ends meet and only gets far sadder from there?

You're getting into Bjork? Now? In 2024 you're just now deciding to get into - ?

Nope. That's fine. I said you can pick, so you can pick. I'll warn you though. this thing's like two and a half hours long and I'm going to spend most of it weeping. If I see you even quiver a laugh I will doxx you online I swear to god.