#saltyrant

[saltysaltdog]

Turns out there's a third more embarrassing option than passing or failing a driver test, which is: due to an error in the booking system you never had a test to begin with and have to make numerous phone calls explaining the issue and putting minimum wage workers into uncomfortable conversations that neither of you want to be in!!!!

I'm very normal about this!!! And about the more phone calls I'll have to make!! I'm feeling average and neutral about the situation!!! Like a normal person!!! Median!!!

[mediumsizetex]

MLP Pillars Human by saltyre

[saltydoesstuff]

Y'all ever just not feel real?

Like you're there, but not there. You feel things, but you aren't. It all feels the same, which is nothing- or it's too fuzzy to tell any difference? You see yourself, but it's not you. You don't recognize yourself in the mirror, you don't know who that is, but it isn't you. You don't know what you look like, but it isn't what is in the mirror.

I want to do things, but I can't. And I don't know why.

I don't like these days.

[jessicas-pi]

The Shuttle AU where Nigel Anstruthers is even more devious and DOESN'T separate Rosalie from her family, and he pretends to be nice and good and even invites Bettina to spend her school holidays at Stornham Court one year.

(That last one was not his best idea, tbh.)

Through chance, circumstance, or maybe the weaving hand of Fate, Bettina Vanderpoel and James Hubert John Fergus Saltyre meet, speak, and quickly discover their mutual distaste for Sir Nigel Anstruthers...

Anyway I call this one Jem and Bett Ruin Nigel's Life (Ten Years Ahead of Schedule)

[saltysaltdog]

Ah... I thought that was just the premise for the cotl world in case somebody didn't know what it was, not necessarily what the books contained. Rip.

(Even if it is a retelling they still need to tell us what aspects they're focusing on, however. Grumble grumble)

You're probably right that it's based on concepty art like the don't starve collab. the artist seems to have done cartoony comic tie ins, like powerpuffs, Rick and morty, etc, so he should've been able to emulate the cotl imagery that's more popular(nicer), but yeah I can only assume that they were conceptualising the comics before the game fully took off. Which is... ominous for the quality.

Vs their more official art style they use regularly

Gotta wonder what happened.

All the custom art I could find for "The First Verse" so far, i wish i had a bigger/higher quality version of the "panorama" style artwork (if anyone finds one, pls let me know)

[jakexneytiri]

tagged by @beautyofattolia

tagging: @neytirisgroove @beautyliesbehindthehills @thevanityofthefox @patrycore @jakesullyspillowtits @jakesullyfatjuicypeen @oceanstide @sulieykte @teyamsatan @upside-down-peonies @bway-car @saltyre

[kanerallels]

The second best part about having read The Shuttle is that you'll be watching a British drama and the broody love interest (who you don't care for) will lose his temper at the main character and you can go "smh my head Lord John Jerry Saltyre Smith Dunstan would NEVER"

The best part about having read The Shuttle is that you'll see a typewriter and immediately go "G. SELDEN???" like you're the Beyonce meme

[becoming-not-became]

Heart

I found my heart in the root cellar hiding behind cans of pickled beets and tomatoes way back tucked away in a dank corner crying no actually thathad stopped now drybut I knew ithaving seen faint saltyrings all around itlike little chalk outlines where bodies lay dying one in the same I thought then staring one in the same

[saltysaltdog]

As a heads up, im over 130+ pages in, and the writer keeps mistakenly attributing decisions to Michael Bay.

Steven Spielberg was the executive producer and worked with Orci and Kurtzman on the first drafts of the first film.

Michael Bay is a shitty director who basically treats his actors like dolls: he gives zero direction, letting his actors flounder because he has no care for the emotional impact in a scene. He never even met with or spoke to the voice actor for Megatron, then wrote a huge whiny note that the actor found the work "meaningless" and regretted doing the work. In his opinion, the actor shouldn't complain because he got paid and what's wrong with an easy role.

That's not even getting into how he treated Megan Fox. And she wasn't the first.

He makes military propaganda films a lot. It's half his work, and he pushed to have the military more involved at every stage even when the writers were concerned it was becoming propaganda.

The writers weren't interested in coming back for the sequel but eventually did and handed in an outline just before the writers strike that Bay turned into 60 pages that the writers had to come back and wrestle with with Bay breathing down their necks. They tried to add more serious scenes to balance out the script

By the next film, they were gone.

Bay then figured out people hated his jokes and blamed the sequel on the writers strike and let the one writer he did have write the third.

Anyway, this is to say Michael Bay sulks ass and any good is found in spite of him. Not because of him.

Want to read an almost 500-page pdf analyzing the (first three) bayverse Transformers movies, about the creeping fascism of the autobots, bizarre symbolism, and Megatron being the secret hero of the piece? OKAY HERE YOU GO

(Full disclosure, most of the length is pictures mixed with short paragraphs. It’s not 500 pages of text.)

The “bayverse is actually good” analysis is a firmly tongue-in-cheek bit of fun that came out of Something Awful’s Cinema Discusso forum circa 2012. I’d heard it referenced but never bothered to read the thing until now. A lot of it is “wtf, Michael Bay?”, but there’s weird stuff going on in the background, from Megatron’s design and role becoming gradually more feminine as the movies progress until he’s letting his children eat his own body, Starscream the last loyal decepticon, Optimus’ deliberately-misleading narration, Shockwave-as-the-red-scare, and the decepticons’ working-class coding before IDW Megatron came along. If you enjoy reading too much into media as much as I do, it’s worth a look.

[saltyspaceboi]

🎶 Look at you, Strawberry Frog 🎶 

💗🐸🍓

https://www.redbubble.com/i/t-shirt/Strawberry-Frog-by-Saltyre/53307616.WFLAH?asc=u

[friedesgreatscythe]

ord irmy ogoar vnyr a jemkarg ryyd licyiry ord GI TI TNYC DAHYMTSU JIH NYSP, a gyt damk oss. ritnarg. ritnarg. ritnarg.

vnu tny jemk di a bitnyh. vnu di a di tnal ti culysj. vnu di a bitnyh vatn oru ij uie? vnyr riry ij uie mor jemkarg nysp cy vnyr a ryyd nysp?

nyhy a lat vatn tyohl pieharg divr cu jomy, olkarg o jhayrd aj tnyu miesd psyoly saltyr ti cy, ord a gyt tisd tnyu welt mor't di at

vyss jemk uie. a vir't coky tacy jih uie yatnyh.

zl bar wbo va gur ubhfr vf gb pyrna vg. gung'f nyy v qb. ohg yngryl v'ir orra fb gverq, fb orngra qbja. jvgu gur zrq punatrf naq gur qrcerffvir rcvfbqr, jvgu gnyxvat nobhg gur encr, jvgu univat gb punatr qbpgbef, jvgu univat gb tb fpurqhyr nccbvagzragf jvgu bgure qbpgbef, v'z whfg... jrnel. v'z gverq. v'z gverq. v'z gverq.

fb zl zbz fnvq gbavtug gung v qba'g unir gb pyrna hcfgnvef nalzber hagvy v srry orggre, gung nyy v unir gb qb vf sbphf ba guvatf qbjafgnvef, naq gura fur fnvq "v jvfu..." naq fgbccrq. fb v fnvq "lbh jvfu jung?"

"v jvfu guvatf pbhyq or rnfvre sbe lbh."

naq v whfg ohefg vagb grnef. fvyrag grnef, fb fur qvqa'g abgvpr. ohg grnef nyy gur fnzr.

orpnhfr abguvat vf rnfl sbe zr. abguvat abguvat abguvat abguvat abguvat. abguvat. rire.

naq vs v ernpu bhg gb fbzrbar, fbzrbar v ernyyl gehfg naq arrq gb gnyx gb, v trg shpx nyy. rvgure gurl nera'g nebhaq be gurl qba'g xabj jung gb fnl be gurl whfg pna'g yvfgra evtug abj. naq vg uhegf. vg uhegf vg uhegf vg uhegf.

v jvfu guvatf jrer rnfvre sbe zr gbb. ohg gurl'er abg. gurl'er abg. gurl'er abg. naq gurl jba'g or.

yngryl gur bayl crbcyr jub arrq zr ner fgenatref va zhygvcynlre tnzrf jub nfx sbe zl uryc orngvat obffrf. gubfr ner gur bayl crbcyr. v'z jbeguyrff naq hfryrff naq haarprffnel naq hajnagrq bgurejvfr.

[saltysaltdog]

Man, Prowl just adds extra layers of insufferable to being a war criminal, huh?

He yells at you for committing a war crime, then once you confront him about him wanting you to commit that warcrime in the first place he gets all shy like, "oh I never said that 👉👈, but yes but no, but you shouldn't have done the war crime in *That* way. I meant a different warcrime." And then just does that forever, setting up other people to do all the warcrimes but not explicitly telling them what to do and just waiting for the dominoes to fall into place. Then, when they don't, he gets angry at everybody. Oh and he's also committing secret warcrimes the whole time.

God, at least everyone else can be direct with the crimes they want you to commit. Or just commit it themselves without waffling over it for several issues waiting for someone else to do it so you don't have to.

This is why he's the worst, Hit him with a stick.

[mediumsizetex]

MLP Pillars Human by saltyre

[saltydoesstuff]

Was gonna start on making more bots, but then stomach decided that it is death day-

My power is too strong- the universe is nerfing me

[lucasbezian]

Blue #Saltyre #sky in #Gourock #Scotland #Clyde #photography #picoftheday #landscape #nature #sunshine #sunporn #bluesky #sea #geoporn (at Gourock)